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#more like looking through a broken clock than a mirror
keeps-ache · 2 years
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do ya ever think about how a bell pepper is like a small pumpkin ? it's like its lil sibling. small, similar, but definitely not the same at all
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utterlyotterlyx · 3 months
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Another Love - Alternate Ending
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Azriel x Fem!Reader
Based on this ask
Original here
Summary - Azriel knows you'd never leave his side, no matter what, but when his new situationship with Elain takes over his every living moment and he takes advantage of your feelings, you make the only decision you can to save yourself only for him to hurt you in a way you never thought he could.
Warnings - ANGST, fluff, swearing, neglect, abuse of feelings, mentions of death, slight grovelling, lots of sadness, feminine rage
Word Count - 6.5k jeez
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The clock ticked away, idly counting the seconds by, seconds that turned to minutes, and minutes that turned to hours, hours that Azriel had seemingly forgotten about the promise he had made to take you to the theatre.
The cobalt blue bow in your hair, that you had chosen to perfectly match him, swayed sadly as you moved about your room with a heavy heart, hanging up the dress you had bought especially for the occasion and changing into something more comfortable to wallow in self-pity.
It had become normal, his lateness, his nightly visits became later and shorter until they had stopped all together, well, that is until he needed something from you, and you would give him whatever he asked for, no matter how much it hurt you.
You had been a part of the Inner Circle for over 500 years, you were one of the originals, growing up in the camps with Rhys, Cassian and Azriel, Rhys' mother protected you fiercely, and you were very close to Selene, your chosen sister. You were the one they turned to for everything, you were wise and brutal, an incredible warrior and tactician, but also soft and kind; you were the blue break in a sky of storm clouds, you were the spring breeze that cut through the edge of winter, you were everything.
A thing Azriel knew all too well.
It didn't surprise you when Azriel had become fond of Elain, like it didn't surprise you when he had pined after Mor for all those years, completely looking over you in the process. Elain was a soft and fragile thing, she was quiet and graceful, and Azriel was completely besotted by her. A fact that made your heart curse your stupidity, cursing the hope you had willed into it that maybe he would finally see you.
It was no secret that you and Azriel were the closest out of all of the members of your growing family, you had shared 500 years of respect and adoration for one another.
Azriel was by your side when Selene had so brutally lost her life, he had held your hand through the depression and brought you back to life. Azriel knew every single thing that you loved and hated, he knew what every facial expression meant, he knew every tick of your body language which silently conveyed how you were feeling. Azriel knew you better than anyone, even better than he knew himself. The map of you laid etched bare on the back of his hand, a map he used to scour daily, but now barely even glanced at.
It wasn't so one sided.
You knew Azriel better than anything, and you knew a lot. 500 years of life pointed to a rich knowledge. You were the one who cleaned him up after a mission, you're the one who mended his broken bones and washed his turmoil away. You were the one who helped him overcome his insecurities with his hands. You were the one his shadows shot to at family dinners. You were the one who sang him to sleep when his demons had become to much. There was nothing you wouldn't do for Azriel, even if it meant standing on the side-lines until he wanted you.
Moonlight streaked along the floor of your bedroom, cascading across the pale blue of your comforter and drifting along the edges of your antique furniture. The dress you had wanted to wear to the theatre hung off the frame of your mirror, rippling softly in the gentle breeze that entered through the slightly ajar window.
It was silly to feel upset, you knew Azriel didn't owe you any of his time, but you had really thought he would pull through, especially after you had told him how much you missed spending time with him.
Interrupting your damaging thoughts, your door opened to reveal Azriel, who looked annoyed and not at all in knowing of his lateness or the promise that now lay in tatters in your chest. From the look on his face, you knew instantly that Elain was the one who plagued his mind, she was the cause of it every time he had come to see you recently.
Huffing, Azriel trudged to your cream living area, propping his feet up on the antique table you had asked him to be careful with far too many times and sinking into the cushions. He hadn't spared you a glance as he entered, he didn't note his colour in the form of a bow in your perfectly styled hair, he didn't see the sadness in your eyes laced with that naïve hope that he may have turned up to apologise for being late. He didn't see you.
"What happened this time?" You inquired, wrapping yourself tighter into your robe and sliding into the seat beside him, tucking your legs underneath you and propping your head in your palm as you stared at him.
Azriel was beautiful, scars and demons and all, the height of his cheekbones, those hazel oceans of a thousand emotions, the golden skin and arched brows, the curve of his muscles under his second skin, everything about him was intoxicating.
"Lucien," Azriel through his head back and closed his eyes, breathing deeply through his nose, "I was so close to kissing her, so close, Y/N. And then Lucien walked in, he ruined it."
The revelation had stung, he'd never admitted to you to being close to kissing Elain before, it was always a myriad of stolen glances and ghosting touches, of hushed words laced with a million differing meanings. But never a kiss.
Azriel paid no mind to the hurt that radiated from you, he knew it was there, he always knew it was there but he couldn't focus on it.
Only an idiot could be blind to the clear feelings you had toward Azriel, the way you looked at him was not the way a friend looked at another friend, no matter how close they were. Azriel knew that he could never truly push you away, no matter how much you were hurting you'd never leave, he knew that, he knew you'd always be there for him to fall into.
It was so awfully wrong, but he lapped in serenity you gave him, in that unwavering loyalty, and he had no intention to stop drinking from your fountain of love.
"Lucien is her mate, Az. He's bound to not like whatever it is that's going on between you," your voice was gentle and full of understanding, your hand rested on his shoulder and he felt any anger disappear almost immediately. That's what your touch alone could do to him, bring him immeasurable peace.
"I know," he sighed, opening his eyes and turning his head to the side to look at you, a small smile tugged at his lips when he noticed how pretty you looked, with your hair parted just how he liked it, and with a bow tied neatly at the back, "I still think that the cauldron was wrong," your face faltered when he immediately continued on his weekly rant, "It gets it wrong sometimes, we know that. It's wrong, it has to be."
All you wanted was for Azriel to be happy, he deserved it more than anyone you knew. Rhys had found Feyre, who you adored tremendously. Cassian had found Nesta, who had become a very good friend of yours. So, you couldn't blame Azriel for believing that Elain was fated to be his, three brothers for three sisters. Even you had to admit that it made sense, The Mother moved in mysterious ways.
You plastered a smile on your face, you vision catching the satin of your new dress moving softly against the breeze, "Maybe it is," Azriel hummed at your words before continuing on, listing everything he adored about Elain.
"I wish sometimes that she was you, you know? That her and I could be like this, with no one watching over us, to be able to spend time alone and do whatever we wanted to do and talk about anything," it was like he didn't realise what he exactly he was wishing for.
Azriel wanted you to be Elain, so that he could have the life he dreamed of. Elain. Not you. Elain.
You weren't good enough for him.
"I hope you get to that point one day, Az," your voice was strained from holding in your strangled sobs, "I'm tired, can we talk about this more tomorrow?"
"Sure," Azriel smiled at you, rising from his seat and heading to the door, standing in the doorway and looking back at your form still glued to your spot, "I like your bow, Y/N. Blue suits you, always has," and then he closed the door behind him, you waited a few moments before letting your sobs flow through your lips and ripping that damned bow from your hair.
Azriel would never see you the way you begged to be seen, and you couldn't sit around and be the one he fell back to when life wasn't going his way.
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More days had passed, more days of Azriel complaining to you, more days of Azriel wishing that Elain and you had switched paths so that he could finally get what he was owed.
Azriel didn't care for your tear stained skin, he didn't care for your weary eyes whenever you spoke of Elain to you.
It was awful that he knew exactly what he was doing, he was abusing your relationship with him, he knew you'd never walk away from him, he knew you'd never be able to put your foot down and tell him to cut it out.
The idea of a mate had him completely obsessed, obsessed to the point that he became blind to what was right in front of him, what had always been in front of him. That blind faith in your loyalty crumbled in his fingers once Rhys had told him that you had decided to purchase your own home in the city, a home away from them all.
"What?" Azriel had asked from his place at the dinner table, bewildered by the news given to them once he had asked where you were.
Nesta knew the exact reason why you had decided you separate yourself from them, you couldn't handle the rejection anymore, and you couldn't begin to heal from the decades worth of heartbreak under the same roof as Azriel and Elain. Nesta knew you held no ill feeling toward her youngest sister, you were too kind for that, you knew it wasn't her fault that Azriel came to you each time something went wrong in their situationship, but that didn't make it hurt any less.
"She left, Az," Mor had cried when Rhys had pulled her to one side that afternoon to tell her that you had decided to move into the home that Rhys had bought you after you had made it clear that you needed your own space, and Rhys had spent an hour trying to convince his cousin that your decision was not impacted by anything any of them did.
"Why didn't you tell me?" Azriel asked his brother who frowned, Feyre grabbed Rhys' hand and squeezed it in hers, "She can't just leave, Rhys."
"She has every right to after everything she's done for all of us, she deserves some peace," Rhys spoke calmly, snapping his fingers and allowing the sentient home to rid the plates and serving dishes from the table.
Azriel was speechless, he felt a frantic pull in his body, one that was poisoned with desperation at the thought of you being anywhere else than under the roof of the River House, the home you had spent a century redecorating and perfecting, paying special attention to each room to make it feel as homely as possible.
He didn't believe it as his chair groaned against the floor and he took off up the stairs toward your room, pushing his way through the doors to find it completely empty. No pictures hanging on the walls, no lines of hooks containing an array of ribbons in different hues, no dresses draped over your mirror, no antique furniture. It was all gone, and the scent of you that was usually so strong that it drowned him was a whisper in the atmosphere.
You had left.
Anger bubbled within him, how could you leave without saying anything? How could you move out of your shared home without a single word? How could you leave him after 500 years at his side?
Azriel flung open the doors to your balcony, a balcony plush with fresh flowers and greenery, he flexed his wings and hurtled himself into the starlit sky, allowing his shadows to peel from his body and search every inch of Velaris until they returned to him reeking of your scent and pulled him down to a small townhouse along the bank of the Sidra.
It was a charming home, pale brickwork, large bay windows, golden light emitting from them, and a large garden full of rich wildlife and botanicals. Your scent flowed from the closed oak door, lavender and honey with a hint of firewood and he found himself following that smell up the winding path until he was knocking on your door.
Golden light flowed from the home as you opened the door. You were dressed in denim overalls that were spatted with cream paint, you hair was loosely bound on the top of your head, and your face was full of uneasy surprise as you looked at him, "Az, what are you doing here?"
Azriel pushed past you and stood in the centre of your hallway, listening to your deep exhale as you closed the door. The space was pretty, it was very you, the walls were half painted cream from their original sage colour that you were obviously painting over, the coving was white and saturated with intricate little sketches of leaves, the carpet was a rich brown and had clearly been laid that day from how interrupted it looked, the only pattern on it being the imprints of your bare feet. Azriel didn't stop his shadows as they extended from him and scoured each part of your new home, nodding with approval and curling around your fingers in understanding adoration.
White sheets were draped over your perfectly placed furniture, to protect it from the paint no doubt, and the same tarp lay at the foot of the walls to protect the carpet. Music drifted softly about the room, and boxes upon boxes of books lay open, with some of them idly placed on shelves to get them out of the way to be sorted properly at a later date.
"It's true? You've really left," he noted the intricately presented kitchen, white cabinets and exposed wooden beams, just like you always wanted.
You rounded him, walking into your new living space, bending down to pick up one of your plant pots before placing it on the window ledge, your back faced him but he could see the pain in your features through the reflection in the window, "Yes, I live here now."
"No. No. You're coming home with me, this is ridiculous," his heart was beating a mile a minute, he couldn't think straight, all that was consuming him was the reality that his fear had come to fruition, that the one person he believed would never leave him had actually walked away.
"I'm not coming back, Azriel," you told him softly, and he saw your shoulders rise and fall with each deep inhale of breath you forced your lungs to take.
Then you turned to him, in the middle of the home that you were trying to make yours, a home away from him, "I thought you'd never leave me. You can't leave me. You're my best friend, I need you."
"No, you don't. You need someone to fall back onto when life isn't going your way, that's all I am to you now," you felt your heart breaking, you felt it shattering in your chest, "I can't be the one you turn to when something becomes between you and Elain. I can't be the one you wish was her. I can't do it anymore, Az. You've taken advantage of me for too long. You promise me the world and show up empty handed. You don't realise I even exist until you need someone to complain to and I just can't do it anymore."
Azriel knew every word you were saying was the truth, he knew he had been using you, but he never expected you to actually walk away from him, you were supposed to love him too much to leave.
Your heart was in the palm of his hands and he knew it, he knew you'd spent hundreds of years falling deeper in love with him each passing day whilst he pined for someone else. The fact of your departure made a bitter monster appear in his mind, he allowed it to tug on the venom in his heart, he allowed it to control him, "Aren't you supposed to be in love with me?"
Azriel watched your eyes widen and a breathless gasp fall from your lips, "You know?"
The Shadowsinger scoffed, "Of course I know. Only a fool wouldn't be able to see it," he saw your face contort into painful sorrow but did nothing to stop himself from saying, "I've known for years. I've known that you'd never leave, you've always been the one that I come to for anything I need and you never complain or tell me to leave. You made it easy to take advantage of you."
A tear slid down your cheek but Azriel made no move to wipe it away, "I want you to leave."
"I'm not leaving without you."
Fire roared in your eyes, "You have no right to command me after what you've knowingly done. I honestly thought that you didn't know, that it was innocent and that you just needed my advice. Now I know that you've willingly abused my kindness, Azriel, you can rot in hell," the tears didn't stop flowing from your eyes, your voice was strained and sore, your chest was so tight that you thought it may stop beating all together, "Get. Out!"
Azriel had left you then, he had left your door wide open and soared into the skies, leaving you in the home that was now tainted by his deceit.
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It had been months since Azriel had seen you, Nesta and Feyre had practically forbid him from going anywhere near your home, that being from the land or sky. But that didn't stop him from allowing his shadows to slither under your front door or linger in the streets, he was desperate to know how you were.
Azriel hated himself for what he had said to you, he hated himself for taking advantage of you. In some way he tried to justify it, you were too good for him, he didn't want to ruin you, but it was clear that he already had.
Your absence had left a void that no one could fill, not even Elain despite her efforts, even the thought of her made his stomach drop and sickness swirl to the point where he couldn't bring himself to be around her. All Elain did was remind him of how he failed you.
Azriel had tried writing to you since you wouldn't see him, he gave the letters to Feyre and Nesta, the latter of which still saw your daily, and grew colder toward him with each passing moment. Even Cassian did nothing to hide his disappointment in him, and Rhys had some very telling words to express once Feyre had told him the truth of what had happened in your home that night.
Nothing was working, things with Elain were strained and difficult, the problems between them so raw and everyone's opinions so disapproving that it created a distance between them that was unmanageable.
Then it dawned on him that nothing was working with Elain because it wasn't meant to. The person who was meant to be his had been under his nose for 500 years, and now wanted nothing to do with him.
Cassian had pulled Azriel from his thoughts by stepping through the threshold of his room, "Are you coming to training?"
"Tell me how to fix it," Azriel lifted his head from his hands and turned his head toward Cassian who sighed in reply, moving to the bed to sit beside Azriel, "I need to know how to fix it."
"Only you can figure that out, Az," Cassian spoke to him, throwing his arm over Azriel's shoulder before continuing, "Y/N loves you Az, she has for 500 years. A few months apart won't change that. You're really fucking stupid for this though, she's the only one of us who knew the exact right thing to do and say every time. Y/N deserves more than the basic requirements of respect, she deserves the world in the palm of her hand and a person who loves her more than he loves himself. Don't bother her unless you can do that."
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It was the anniversary of Selene's death, and the day hadn't gotten any easier for you to deal with.
Rhys and you had made a habit of doing something together each year, though, Azriel was the one to accompany you when Rhys had gone Under the Mountain. The location was sacred to you, you and Rhys would bundle yourselves up in blankets and watch the sun set over the Sidra, you'd rehash old memories and stories, ones that you both knew the script to by heart, but that never got old.
Your High Lord had tried to convince you to come home, but didn't push you when you had told him no. Your life had began to feel rather empty without the family antics that consumed your day-to-day life.
"I miss her," you had told him sadly, your head rested on his shoulder as the sun tipped her toes into the water in the distance, the sky grew darker each passing minute.
Rhys hummed, holding you closer to his side, "So do I," he replied with equal sadness, you had all grown up together, you basically were his sister by blood, and when you both had lost her, it only made him clutch to you more, "She'd nail Az's balls to the wall for sure."
A laugh passed through your lips before it died in your throat, you had done your best to not think about Azriel despite him owning your soul, you had done your best to heal from what he had done, but even then, you missed him more than anything, "How is he?"
It was the first time you had asked about him since before you had moved to your new home which was now fully decorated and yours, thanks to Rhys, Feyre and Nesta who made it their priority to help you settle, "He's-" Rhys couldn't lie to you, he was never able to even when you were younger, "-Not great. He misses you, he hates himself for what he said to you that night."
"I'd hate myself too," you had hummed, shifting to stand on the stone ledge where you and Rhys had sat, wanting a better view of the sun as it began to disappear against the horizon.
A familiar cold kiss pecked at your ankles and you looked down to see those shadows you had missed so dearly meandering around where you stood. Cedar entered your lungs and you shivered in painful delight as his warmth curled around your back.
"Y/N," his voice was deep and rough, it was pleading, you looked to your side and found that Rhys had vanished. That damn meddler. "Please look at me."
Not able to say no to that voice, you indulged the Shadowsinger and turned on the balls of your feet to peer upward at him. Azriel had his wings neatly tucked behind his back, his hands dangled at his sides, and his head was hung low. He looked terrible.
"Why are you here?"
Azriel clenched his jaw, he didn't expect you to be happy to see him, but it didn't stop the self hatred from growing in every single cell of his body, "I know how hard today is for you, I just wanted to see if you were alright."
"Well I'm fine, so you can go now," you made a move to walk away, to take the path down the edge of the Sidra to your home which had become your haven away from reality.
Though, you didn't get very far, perhaps two steps before Azriel's fingers curled around your wrist, stopping you in your tracks and pulling you back to him, "Y/N, I don't even know how to apologise in the way that you deserve. I don't know how to say sorry and make you feel like I see and hear you."
"What I did was disgusting, I hate myself for it. I never should have taken advantage of you like that, you've done everything to help me the entire time that I've known you and I ruined everything for someone I don't even want. I've always wanted a mate, you know that, and I got so carried away with wanting it that I completely ignored the only person who's ever truly loved me for me despite all of the horrid things I have done. Elain isn't you, Y/N. No one compares to you. No one makes me feel safe like you do, no one makes me feel alive like you do, and no one can make me hope for death by their void like you do."
"I am yours, Y/N. I always have been. I couldn't be the reason you ever got hurt, I couldn't be the one to risk extinguishing that glorious fire in your soul. You are the only one I cannot bear to lose, the thought of losing you terrifies me, it always has, and instead of protecting you, I took advantage of you and pushed you away because I would rather hurt someone else with everything that I am than hurt you with just a a part of it."
"I'm so stupid for ignoring you, I'm a prick for using you as my security blanket rather than let you in, you know me better than I know myself, you love me more than I could ever imagine, and it terrified me because I couldn't let myself love you. I couldn't let myself taint you."
Azriel lifted his hands, cupping your face in his palms and you could see every inch of despair within him, that conflicted flame dancing within his soul, "I'm not asking you to forgive me, I don't think I will ever be able to forgive myself after what I've done to you. I'm not asking for anything from you. I just need you to know that no matter how severe your storm, I promise I won't leave your side, I'll stay with you through the howling winds that whip my cheeks raw and red. I will stay and hold you when the night leaves you shivering and give you space when when your searing heat pushes you into a fiery rage. I will stay and love you in whatever way you crave, whether that be from next to you or from wherever you cast me to."
"Azriel-" tears flowed freely from his eyes and you knew he meant every word he was saying. Every single word was being plucked from the core of his essence.
"I know that you're scared, and that you don't trust me. I'm scared too. But you're the only one I can face love with because I only want to feel it with you. At the end of the day I want it to be you and me, I want your early mornings and late nights, I want you on your good days and bad. I will never stop wanting you. I will never stop needing you filling my lungs like oxygen and giving me life."
Azriel dropped his forehead onto yours, and you felt your own cheeks dampening from your own tears at his words, "I love you, Y/N. I will always love you, even if you don't want me to, even if you decide to walk away from me I will not stop loving you. I am so thankful for you, and I know I haven't shown that, but if you give me one more chance, I will show you exactly the man you have made me into. I will give you the world you have always dreamed of. My soul is yours until you stop loving me. Please. Please."
There was a silence as you contemplated his words, maybe he did mean them, but it still didn't detract from the clear fact that he had knowingly abused your love of him, that he had knowingly taken advantage of you.
"No," Azriel physically winced as you removed yourself from his embrace, his forehead and fingers crying at the loss of your touch, his shadows retracted like they had been burned, withering away before his eyes.
"No?"
"No, Azriel," you wiped your cheeks free of your sadness which had turned into rage, "You can't come here on my hardest of days to confess your love for me after abusing me endlessly, after overlooking me our entire lives for others. I will not be your second, third, or last choice. If I'm not your first choice then I don't want to be a part of it at all. I loved you, Az. I loved you more than my lungs needed air to survive, I would have done anything for you. I did do everything for you. And this is how I'm repaid, by being consciously used to inflate your precious ego?"
"Y/N, no, it wasn't like that," he reached for you and you took a step back, the stars illuminated the sky in their richly elegant glow, and you could feel Selene wrap her heavenly arms around you and tell you to stick it to the man.
"But it was Azriel. It was like that. First it was Mor who you pined after for decades, I could deal with it then, I knew how much you wanted to be loved and cherished, and with Mor, you never came to me and complained, it was like you didn't even want her. But then Elain, you made me so small and insignificant, you had the gall to wish she was me, you knew I loved you and you chose to say that?"
"Y/N, please-"
"Stop fucking talking," you hissed, "I do not live to serve you, the purpose of my life is not to be your maid and mother and nurse so you don't have to lift a finger. I am not your therapist or path to live out your pathetic picket fence dream. I am Y/N, I was your best friend, I would have given you everything and I did even when you gave me nothing and I am done. I am done being the thing you can throw aside and pick up when you want to feel good about yourself. I'm done."
Your body felt ten times lighter, like you had just off loaded all of the rage that had been stacked within your mind and soul directly to the person who deserved to know just how vile they had been to you.
"I never want to talk to you again. I'm not sorry, the only one to blame for everything falling apart is you and your whimsical other-worldly dreams. Grovel your heart out, Az, you're never going to know about my life from here on out. I forbid it."
And then you left, you had left Azriel stood on that rock looking the most broken you had ever seen him, even his shadows had fully retreated into his body, wounded by your words and ashamed of their master. They had just lost their favourite thing in the world.
He had continued to try and get your attention in the weeks that followed, appearing on the streets and trying to speak to you to which you wholly ignored, he had showed up at Rita's and tried corner you, begging you to just listen, but you looked right through him.
Rhys had agreed to give you a different position, one that would mean less opportunity to bump into Azriel. You had become an emissary to the Night Court, Rhys' most trusted one at that, and you travelled Prythian and kept bonds alive and strong between the courts.
The Inner Circle were mostly just polite to Azriel, they respected your decision, some even admired it, and Azriel stood and watched as Elain accepted the bond with Lucien, feeling foolish for ever believing that he was deserving of such a sacred thing.
Every time you had returned home, Azriel would have all manners of gifts delivered, from pastries to fine jewellery and dresses . It had gotten so out of hand that you had to scream into Rhys' mind to get his brother to stop. You had kept your word, you didn't speak to him even when you did see him.
And soon enough he stopped, he didn't linger in the streets or on the bank of the Sidra, his shadows no longer followed you, no more gifts arrived at your home that was bursting with new wonder. Azriel had finally realised that no amount of pleading words or pretty things would bring you back to him. You were gone.
The hope that had filled his heart, that had broken the shadow shrouding his soul, when Rhys had announced that you were joining them for dinner that evening, was enough to bring some happiness to him. Azriel had been a ghost of himself, wallowing in self pity and loathing, completing his missions to a far more gruesome degree before returning home and tending to his own wounds. No one was there to help him anymore.
You were ethereal, you had stepped through the door with a happiness he hadn't seen in your in decades, your skin was glowing and your eyes were bursting with happiness. You were dressed in a ornately stunning forest green dress, one that he had never seen before, and you sat in your usual seat, that one that had laid empty for thirteen months wedged between Feyre and Nesta's chairs, the one they glanced at longingly each day.
Yet again, you avoided Azriel, but not obviously in a sense, you just negated to recognise his presence entirely. The only thing you did recognise were his shadows that pecked your wrists, and he willed you to look at him, instead, you only smiled at the shadows and that was enough to make them feel validated and still loved by you.
Rhys had asked how you'd been and you didn't relent on sharing your tales from your travels across the continent, from the libraries in the Day Court that Helion had given you access to, to learning the healing powers from the top healers in Dawn, you were enriched with knowledge and you were loving every moment.
"I do have some news," you spoke and if Azriel hadn't been listening to your stories, which he certainly was because it made him feel like a part of your life again, he was definitely listening to you now.
Azriel noticed the blush creeping up your cheeks and the bashful look in your eye, he watched your chest rise and fall shakily as you tried to form the words to tell them what you needed to. Azriel knew that look, because that's how you used to look when you were thinking about him.
"I found my mate," you had admitted, and your eyes found him for the first time in over a year, they held sympathy within them, and he felt all of the air rush from his lungs.
Your look only lasted a couple of seconds before Rhys wrapped you up in his arms, laughing joyfully at the news as the rest of the room, even Elain and Lucien, stood to congratulate you, everyone but him.
"Do we know him?" Feyre asked, her blue-grey eyes brimming with happy tears, all they wanted was to you to find your happiness, in whatever way that would be gifted to you.
You nodded, a love-sick smile on your face, "You do, we've already accepted the bond, and I know you may not approve but I need you to, for me? He's coming tonight, I want you all to meet him."
Rhys kissed your forehead and Azriel felt the fire rage within his chest, he'd give anything to have your skin under his lips again, "Of course," the door sounded and Azriel felt as though he was in a fever dream.
You had a mate. His Y/N had found her mate.
You had inhaled deeply and squeezed Feyre's hands in your own before you left the room, the muffled muttering of your voice conversing with your mate sounding to Azriel's left. He knew they were glancing at him, but they didn't say a word, and he didn't meet their gazes, he didn't look up until your scent mixed with another's entered the room. The perfect harmony of lavender and pine, of spiced oranges and honey.
"I believe you all know Eris," he heart dropped to his stomach and Azriel felt the room spin as he looked toward you, toward Eris Vanserra, High Lord of the Autumn Court, who gently laid his hand on your hip and pressed his lips to your temple.
Eris had become an ally after overthrowing Beron, Mor had forgiven him for his past transgressions, Rhys had even considered him a friend. Eris Vanserra was your mate.
The room audibly gasped and rushed to you both, hugging and congratulating you, so unbelievably happy that you had found your person, "The moment I saw her in my court I knew it was her. It snapped for me before she realised it, but I couldn't have anyone else whilst knowing that this beautiful creature was out there fated to be mine," his eyes were full of love, unblemished untainted pure love, and yours twinkled in reply as you unveiled the large sapphire on your ring finger, "Y/N is set to become my High Lady. I promise you all that I will cherish her every moment of every day. I am so irrevocably in love with her and I just know that our souls will find one another in every universe we may wander into. She's my everything and I will always choose her. Always."
Azriel watched you, doing his best to simmer down the fire raging within his heart, he looked at your bright smile and sparkling eyes, he roamed your glowing skin and inhaled your mated scent, and then his gaze fell on the barely there swell of your stomach and he decided in that moment that you were divine and untouchable, and that he would finally let you go if it meant that you'd be happy and breathe the life that you were meant to own.
A life full of the love that no one deserved more than you.
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Authors Note
I think I like this version better..
@saltedcoffeescotch @fxckmiup
636 notes · View notes
shawnxstyles · 5 months
Text
the only one
DATE: JANUARY 2, 2024
summary: you go on your first date with peter, and it ends even better than you could have ever expected. ;)
request: yes!
words: 6.3k
warnings: SMUT (f-receiving [oral, fingering, multiple orgasms], protected sex, dirty talk), language, and the most gentlemanly man.
note: i cannot believe i’m finally writing another gyno!peter after all this time… anyway, this is NOT an actual series, simply just more situations/scenes of these two together!
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gynecologist!peter x patient!y/n
Every date that you’ve been on in the past never made you this nervous. You didn’t spend two hours just deciding on what to wear and taking an extra hour to prepare yourself. You worked for a fashion magazine, editing and reviewing comments and critiques. You were surrounded by clothes and creativity all day, but struggled to pick a “first-date look” from your closet. You swore you read something about that before…
You never thought first dates were anything more than a simple introduction, a first impression of another human being. It was one of the foundations of the question, “Could I get along well enough with this person to go on a second date?”.
You had only been on two first dates: one with your ex, who you were with for four months, and recently with that guy from your work. The second one was mainly just a hook-up, and the first one obviously led to some type of relationship that didn’t work out in the end. Maybe you didn’t have enough experience in the dating world to be wondering if the amount of nerves you had right now was healthy.
Your hands were clammy as you strapped on your black heels. You noticed you were swallowing more frequently than normal, and you didn’t understand why. When you looked in the mirror, your hands flattened out your black dress more times than you could count, ridding wrinkles that aren’t even there.
After your appointment a few weeks ago, you had texted Peter. More specifically, you texted him the next day. Immediately after simply saying hello and your name, you thought of how many other people he may have given his phone number to. Or worse, how many people he had fingered in his office… You started worrying if you shouldn’t have texted him at all because he was a doctor. He was probably too busy for anything. It was just a nice gesture, maybe?
But an hour later, in the evening, he had texted you back with a short apology. He was working a little past the clock in order to get more doctor stuff done. Even his texts were sweet with a dab of charm. How do women control themselves around him?
Or maybe it was just you, and you were a fucking weirdo.
Yeah it could be that.
Peter and you went on to texting every now and then to texting daily. Texting him was something to look forward to after a long day at work. It also became pretty clear that he wasn’t texting anyone else because well, he was working throughout the day doing doctor stuff while you were doing editor stuff. He would even text you during his lunch break and that always made your heart skip to see his message in the middle of the day.
One night in particular, you were complaining to Peter (yes, you had gotten to the point where you could complain about little inconveniences) about your sink malfunctioning. Instead of asking you to send pictures of the pipes under the sink, he had you FaceTime him. It was the first time you guys have ever called and the second time you’ve ever seen his face, so your heart was a little race-y. But when that charming, wide grin flashed on your screen, he easily slipped into conversation. Peter helped you fix your sink with a little wrench movement along with replacing a broken screw through the phone.
It wasn’t awkward. It was relieving.
You didn’t have to force a certain personality in order to engage in a conversation with him. You felt more yourself than you ever have when talking to him, flowing easily like two streams into one. You hadn’t even realized how late it was by the time you guys ended the call until he was gone. The serenity of your place felt a little more emptier than usual without the sound of his beautiful accent from your speaker. It was nearly midnight by the time you went to bed, wondering how things would be if you and Peter took your friendship a bit further.
Would talking always be this simple? Would he always be this charming?
After that night, you would make excuses to call him. He never denied you, even after he told you he had a long day at the hospital. You guys were not only texting now, but calling daily. You would get excited for his texts and calls, looking forward to talking to him. That’s when you realized you wanted more with him. It felt like you knew each other forever, but it had merely been a few weeks. You wanted to go on a date with him, wanted to be with him in person again. And of course, your mind wandered to the thought of how he is in bed.
If he was that good with just his quick fingers, then how good was he with more space and time? You began to dream about it.
Then he finally asked you. It was so sudden, you honestly didn’t expect it.
You were debriefing your plans for the week and what you had to do at work.
“Sometimes, I feel like my life is on repeat,” You chuckle, but it sounds tired.
“You’re always doing the same thing every week?” Peter questions. He found that he loves just listening to you talk for hours about whatever. He prompts you with questions, and you always answer thoroughly. It’s like an unspoken routine for you two.
“I mean, it feels like that. I never have time to go out and do anything. And when I do, I don’t go out,” You half-smile to yourself as you look down at your lap. You sounded kind of lame, so you were trying not to cringe at yourself.
“You told me your agenda for this week, but what about Saturday and Sunday?”
“Oh, well, you know I don’t work on the weekends. Sometimes, I get extra stuff done at home, but only because I’m bored. I watch TV…” You squint your eyes, trying to think of things you do on the weekend when you’re not busy. “You know, I’m listening to what I’m saying, and I am so lame. God, I need a life outside of work.”
“You’re not lame. Just busy. Give yourself some credit,” he waves off your dig at yourself, and you don’t stop yourself from smiling. He’s just too nice. You can’t take your eyes off him through the small screen as he watches you back.
“Yeah, yeah. Enough about me. What are your weekend plans?” You definitely talk too much, so you always attempt to ask him questions back.
“Well, I was thinking of taking you out,” he very casually says, nonchalantly staring at you through the camera. “Unless you’re busy watching TV.”
“W-What?” Heat crawled up your neck and ears, skin flaming off of his quick words. He’s always charming and always confident with you, so why are you surprised he’s this smooth? You wonder if he’s been thinking about it for a while or if he just got the idea randomly. “Are you serious?”
“Yes. Unless you don’t want to. In that case, I am joking…”
“I want to, Peter,” You smile with the words. It feels impossible to lower your cheek muscles because of the giddiness coursing through you. “If I’m honest, I’ve kind of been waiting for you to ask me.”
“I was a little slow, yeah?”
“Yeah, both the turtle and the hare beat you to the finish line,” His wonderful laugh echoes through the speaker of your phone, and it fills you with warmth.
While other people have belittled you and forced you to be one way, Peter naturally allows you to be yourself. Your wit flourishes, and your insecurities fade into unique parts of you. Whether you two are friends or more, you need more people like Peter in your life.
After you two had confirmed the plans for Saturday, you two both went to bed when the call ended. When your head hits the pillow, it’s instantly filled with scenarios of you and Peter. Mostly how your first date might go. Is he the type to pull out a chair for you? Definitely. Would he pay without a second glance? Probably, knowing he has that doctor paycheck. Would he kiss you after walking you back to your door? Maybe, maybe not.
But he did finger-fuck you in his office, so nothing is really that impossible.
So, you let your mind wander for the rest of the night while you sleep peacefully. Yes, you had some great dreams.
Instead of texting you that he’s here, Peter knocks on your door. The sound itself made your heart accelerate instantly as you stride quickly to answer it. You’ve been overthinking all the ways that this day could go bad, seriously hoping that it doesn’t.
“Hey,” Peter says, clearly eyeing you up and down. He sounds slightly breathless, but not as if he just ran to your door. No, more like he’s speechless. But you could just be overanalyzing every little detail.
“Hey,” As you repeat the word back, you’re both silent for a second. It’s not awkward as it is tense. You’re both just observing and taking in the appearance of the other, appreciating the time and effort in the looks. Peter’s wearing a navy button-up with black slacks. The first two buttons are undone, giving you a peek at his seemingly smooth chest. He’s not wearing a jacket, so you get a view of his arms. From the way the rich fabric stretches around his muscles, it’s obvious that he works out. He just keeps getting better. He continues to check more of your boxes. “Let me just go grab my purse really quick.”
You snatch your bag off of the coffee table after checking you have everything. What if his one flaw is that he won’t pay for at least half the dinner? You must prepare for all the possible outcomes.
“You look brilliant,” You can see him swallow before his compliment, and you wonder if he’s as nervous as you are. He never makes it a point to look even the slightest bit unsure, which you admire. He’s very charming, which takes a lot of confidence, and he’s very good at it. When he asked you out in his office, you saw that persona slip just a tad, enough for you to see that he is human and that he gets nervous too. You found him adorable. You still do.
“You as well,” You blush as you shut the door behind you. The two of you walk to his car, and of course, he opens the door for you. You can’t stop blushing. “Seriously, how do you make such a simple outfit look so good?”
“Unbutton it,” he answers before gently shutting your door closed. Your mind instantly went to places that it shouldn’t have, making your skin burn. You thought about unbuttoning his shirt slowly and sensually until it fell down his bulky arms. You thought about unbuttoning his slacks and palming his cock. He would be so hard for you, and you didn’t hesitate to get on your knees. God, you wished it was real because you truly would not hesitate for this man.
You shake your head, attempting to rid yourself of those dirty thoughts, so you can have a peaceful date. A first date with Peter.
When you guys get to the restaurant, that small voice in the back of your head expects it to be awkward the second you sit down. But once again, you were proven incorrect.
Peter instantly engages in a smooth conversation, asking how your week was overall. You told him all about work and the papers you’re reviewing, and he told you about some of his patients. Every time he mentions anything doctor related, it just makes you swoon. It’s impressive how intelligent he is, and even more so how hard he works. It’s obvious he loves what he does, and you never realized that loving one’s passion was a must-have in your partner checklist.
You also just love the way he talks. His accent makes your skin hot and your spine tingle. Your mind wanders to places it shouldn’t more often than not. And his gaze never leaves yours, only when talking to the waiter when ordering.
There is never a dull moment. Even as you were patiently waiting for your food, you still found things to talk about.
“What do you think they’re celebrating?” he asks, observing two people in the back corner with smiles on their faces.
“They’re dressed nicely, and they’re holding hands too much to be together for that long. I’m going to guess the three or four month anniversary.”
“What about them?” he nudges his head in the direction of the people not too far from you two, sitting with straight faces.
“Oh, they’re not celebrating. Probably breaking up.”
“Who goes to such a nice restaurant for a break-up?”
“I don’t know. Sounds like rich people problems to me,” You joke, and you both share a chuckle. It feels nice to casually chat and people watch with somebody else. When your food arrives, you both eat with more adding silence, slipping in words slowly.
“Did I tell you you look really good tonight?” Peter changes the topic, eyes fixating back onto you.
“Yes… Thank you,” You feel yourself blushing all over your body. You use your napkin to wipe your lips, but you’re really using it to protect your face. It was so obvious what his words did to you, that’s probably why he said them. Suddenly, the room feels a little too hot, even just in your dress. “Took me a while to find out what to wear.”
“You could have worn a garbage bag and still looked great,” Peter says, causing you to roll your eyes.
“Oh, stop it. You’re such a charmer. What’s your game? What do you want?” Your words are playful, but the look in Peter’s eye seems more serious. More powerful and heated. Eyes you haven’t seen for a long time in another person, and it freezes you still. The only thing that’s countering the lust circling his irises is the uprising smirk on his lips.
“To take you home.”
Boy, was he a charmer.
“Don’t ask if I’m kidding because I’m not,” he adds, setting down his napkin on the table. He leans over, a curl falling onto his forehead. A hand reaches halfway across the white cloth and rests delicately on your hand. Even his touch was warm and soft, not forceful in any way. “If you want, I’d like to.”
“I…” You were speechless. You knew what your answer would be, but you were just starstruck. How can one person be so gentlemanly yet hot? Cocky yet so sweet? God really didn’t give anyone a chance when making Peter. “Yes, I would like that a lot.”
Your thumb rubs reassuring circles on his thumb while you smile like a fool. Peter’s smirk only got bigger as the night went on.
You talked. You laughed. You smiled.
But as he drove you to his house, you got nervous again. Maybe you guys would do something as normal as watch a movie. Maybe even cuddle a bit. But you really, really hoped it was more. Especially after your first meeting, you knew Peter wasn’t too shy about sexual matters. However, maybe he didn’t want to do that with you yet and just wanted to take things slow.
But his office…
When his hand was on yours on the table, your memory was brought back right to the moment of his fingers inside of you in the chair. You remembered the feeling of him pushing his digit in and out repeatedly and how good it felt when he removed his latex gloves. Your core rumbled with lust, getting off on the mere fantasy of it all.
When you arrive at his house, you both silently get out of the car. Besides the sound of nature, you could only hear your racing heart and how it was racking against your ribcage in intense beats. He unlocks his door, keying jingling while the breeze flows past. You’re hyper-aware of every noise as if Peter could hear your choppy breath. When he finally opens the door, he lets you in first and you smile, trying to not let your obvious nerves surface.
But you clearly fail when he points it out.
“What are you thinkin’ about?” Your eyes lock on his hands as he rests his key on his door side table and feet as he casually slips off his dress shoes. Everything about him was mesmerizing. You swear you could just watch a documentary of a regular day in his life and you could be starry-eyed.
“Bunch of things.” But it was really just one thing.
“Care to share?” Peter shifts to the kitchen and you follow him like a helpless dog, clutching your bag for dear life.
“I keep thinking about…the last time we were together,” the words fall from your mouth as you round the counter. You felt like you needed to create some distance between you two if you were going to admit something like that.
“What about it?” Peter’s knack to ask questions right now is making your face burn from embarrassment under his bright kitchen lights. He grabs two glasses and fills them up with fridge water without even asking if you wanted some.
“You know, the fun part,” You round the counter to reach the water, slowly taking a sip. When you set the glass down, your eyes don’t leave his chest. You’re too afraid to look into his eyes.
“I thought it was all pretty fun,” he says, placing down his own glass and taking one large step towards you “Especially the part where you came all over my hand.”
Your skin flames, eyes peering at him for a moment before dashing away. His finger slides beneath your chin to turn your face back to him. He could feel your radiating heat and could see the widening of your pupils under the luminous lights.
“Were you thinking of that?” His finger directs your chin upwards, forcing you to look at him. His voice was low and husky, only for you to hear. “Because I haven’t stopped since the day I walked out of that room.”
“Peter…”
“Just say the word, honey, and I’ll kiss you right now.”
You could just melt into a puddle on the floor of his kitchen. His words are so sensual, there is no way you could ever say no to this man. He’s irresistible without trying too hard.
“Please,” You mustered out seemingly breathless while your eyes were locked into his surely.
He doesn’t miss the beat. His head turns as his lips crash against yours. Your lower back hits the island of the counter of marble, but you don’t flinch. His lips electrocute yours, sending jolts of energy coursing through your body like a shock. Your hands naturally find his neat yet messy styled hair on his nape, fingers rummaging through the curly ends. One of his hands holds your waist down from moving as if he already knows you’re antsy to grind on him. His other caresses your jaw in a stable position, the type of dominance you’ve been craving since that day in his office.
His hand goes underneath your thigh, leading you to wrapping your legs around his waist. You thought he was going to sit you on the counter, but he walked all the way to a bedroom without breaking the kiss.
Peter gently lays you on the bed, causing you to depart from the kiss. He wordlessly goes to unbutton his shirt, but you quickly sit up to do it. You’ve been thinking about doing it since he picked you up, so it only seems right that your fantasy comes true, right?
Just like you imagined, you slowly flicked off the buttons and delicately removed the fabric until it was a bundle of cloth on the floor. On the edge of the bed on your knees, you stare up at Peter with a lustful glint in your eye. That glowy look caused Peter to kiss you again, hungrier than before. His force makes you fall onto the mattress again, making you gasp. He trails down your neck in sloppy kisses, touching every inch of your neck and chest with his lips.
“Where did you get this dress?” You didn’t expect him to ask you that while he was groping your breasts through the material. You moan at the feeling of his rough thumbs on your nipples. It’s very distracting while you try to remember where you got the dress that is currently in the way.
“Um Zara? I-I don’t remember,” You moan loudly, not having time to conceal it as he suckles a mark on your neck.
“Do you like it?”
“What?”
“The dress.”
“S-Sure, yeah. It’s-It’s not my favorite, though,” His tousled hair tickles your face as he gets closer to your boobs.
“Maybe you should have worn a garbage bag.”
“Why?” You pull back a little, moving his head up so you can see his face. You thought maybe you would see some expression of disgust, but he only has pure enjoyment. His soft smile turns into a smirk that you’re growing really fond of. It means he’s about to do something hot.
“Because then I wouldn’t feel so bad about ripping it off of you.”
Just like that, the thin straps are easily snapped from his large hands while he yanks the long dress down your body and onto the floor. His mouth instantly went onto your nipple, sucking until he was satisfied with the raw peak of it. He repeated the same movement the opposite one until you were a panting mess, huffing and puffing from just his mouth on your chest.
You can tell he knows how to do this. Yes, he works in gynecology so it’s a benefit that he knows the female body inside and out. But he’s actually skilled in his technique. Although he is hungry and nearly primal, he takes his time with certain areas, making your body want him more and more each time. It’s incredibly smart, and you’re wondering why every man doesn’t know how to properly treat a woman.
You don’t even know your body the way he seems to know it.
His mouth is at your panties before you could even process it. Right when you think he’s about to widen your legs like you so desperately want him to, he stops when his hands rest on your knees gently. He had been going at a fast pace, but now, he’s slow and controlled. Taunting in a way. Torturing.
“I’m going to remove these now, yeah?” He knows you want it now because he has you in his bed right where you want to be. His tone is not as shy as it had been in the office. It’s more controlling yet still soft. “Words, Y/N.”
That demand was all too similar to his words back in the chair with his hands on your waist. He was about to pull off your underwear then for professional reasons, and now, he’s going to yank them off for selfish ones.
“Please take them off,” Just like you had then, you clenched around nothing. Just his sensual words that make you spiral into horny oblivion. Your wavering tone makes him smile as he tugs down the thin material from your legs, tossing them somewhere in the room.
Then he finally widens your legs, facing your aching pussy that hasn’t forgotten about him since all those weeks ago. You were throbbing and leaking to the damn bed sheets, but you couldn’t give a fuck less. You wanted his fingers, his mouth, his cock–anything that he was willing to give you.
“That day,” he starts, “I really wanted to taste you. You were dripping all over my fingers. It was so hard to stay professional.”
He leans down and gets really close to your cunt, inches away from doing what he really wants to do.
“You’ll let me taste you, right?” he asks in an innocent kind of way, but there’s hints of taunt in there. It makes your core burn, and you almost moan at the way his breath hits your center.
“Yes, please. Do whatever you want,” You say that because it’s true–he can do whatever he wants to you, and you would be grateful.
“So polite. So eager,” he kisses your thigh, dangerously close to you now, “And so, so wet.”
“Peter, please,” You were begging now, but you didn’t care. You would beg all night for Peter to touch you the way he did in his office. You’ve tried to replicate it, but it’s no use. You’ve been craving that feeling for weeks now, and he seems to be the only one who can get you there.
“So polite. Good girl.”
To your luck, he doesn’t say another word. He finally puts his mouth on your pussy by slurping up all of your juices. You immediately moan, just by the mere knowledge that his mouth is on you. His tongue slips through your folds all the way up to your clit. Peter suckles on it, feeling it throb in his mouth.
“Taste even better than I imagined,” You don’t know if his whispered words were meant to be heard by you, but you heard them. They caused you to clench right as his tongue slotted inside of you, desperate to taste more of you.
His large hands are pressed against the insides of your thighs, forcing you to stay spread for him. You can feel them ache, but nothing feels as prominent as his tongue inside of you. And then, just when it starts to feel good, he makes it feel even better. One of his digits finds your clit, circling pressure until you’re a moaning mess.
“Fuck, Peter. That’s… so good.”
His mouth pops off of you for a second to catch a breath. But he could honestly drown in the taste of you. He smoothly slides a finger to replace where his mouth was, filling you up just like in his office. Now, his mouth is sucking on your clit, needing to make it throb. You feel that feeling you’ve been chasing for the past few weeks building up in your stomach, and you know it’s not going to be long at all until you achieve it.
“Come. Show me what only I can make you do,” Peter grumbles, his words cascading over your body. The deep rumble of his voice tips you over the edge, causing you to come all over his fingers again. After cleaning up some of your orgasm, he lifts his mouth, but doesn’t remove his fingers. He continues to pump them in and out, even though you’re sensitive.
“So fuckin’ tight, and I haven’t even given you a second finger,” one of his fingers taps of your clit, causing you to gasp at how sensitive you are. “Can you give me another?”
“A-Another one?” You’re panting and sweating from just one, but he wants to give you another? Who is this man, and where has he been all your life? “I can’t.”
“Oh, but you can. The body is an amazing thing,” he inserts another finger into your cunt and increases his intensity on your nerves. You gasp again, moaning without caring how loud you are. “See, your clit makes you do that. And I love that.”
“Oh, Peter,” You helplessly whimpered. As he thrusts his fingers inside of you with that charming smile and a hint of a smirk, you already feel your high approaching you again. The sight and the feel of him was just too overwhelming. With each thrust of his fingers, his arms bulged, forearm veins popping deliciously. He was a sight for sore eyes.
“C’mon, baby. Give me another. Want to feel you clench around my fingers. Imagine it’s my cock. Imagine how big my cock is going to feel in your little, tight cunt.”
His words oozed sex. So it only made sense that you came not long after. Your release coated his skilled hand once again, and this time, he seemed satisfied with your two orgasms.
When you could finally catch your breath, you didn’t see him reaching for his belt like most men do. But you really, really wanted him to reach for his belt.
“Are you tired? How do you feel?” The tone in his voice was soft. He was easily able to change from sex Peter to caring Peter. Your heart melted at his concern.
“Tired, but good tired. I’ve only ever had three orgasms, and you just gave me two of them,” You laughed breathlessly while he chuckled. “Would I be selfish to ask for more?”
That made him laugh. It was wholehearted and deep, echoing throughout the room. “Not at all.”
And then he reaches for his belt. You feel your organs twist in that lustful, horny way that they do when he does anything. When all his clothes are discarded and you’re faced with his raging cock, you’re practically drooling. He was right when he said he was big; thick and veiny all along the sides. It seemed unfair, really.
He reaches over to the nightstand and grabs a condom, ripping it and rolling it on easily. You continue to watch him in awe as he strokes himself a few times over the condom. Truth be told, he’s already incredibly hard. The second he slips inside of you he fears he will come on the spot because of how tight you are.
But he leans over your body, elbows holding himself up. You can smell his fresh scent, full of pine and wood.
“Did I tell you you look beautiful tonight?” he whispers next to your ear, his warm breath hitting your skin, which gives you the shivers. Your hands trail up over his body until they’re resting on his broad shoulders. You can feel his tensed muscles working to hold him up right, even though it looks like an effortless task to him.
“Oh shush. But thank you,” His comment makes your face warm, like a candle right next to your cheek.
“You look especially pretty under me,” his cock brushes your cunt, sliding delicately through the folds. You’re not shy of gasping, trying to mentally prepare yourself for his impeccable size.
When he finally pushes the head in, you take a deep breath and release it in a small whimper. You know you’re tight because you haven’t been with anyone in a few weeks. The most you’ve taken are Peter’s fingers, which are nothing compared to his cock.
He waits a few moments before moving again, giving you time to adjust. But you don’t think you’ll ever be able to fully settle with his size. It seems like he’ll always be stretching you out, no matter how many times you take him.
“Breathe, baby,” his words are breathy and wavering, but so sweet. The small nickname gives you the butterflies you haven’t felt for a while. Not the nervous butterflies, but that tingling, excited feeling of fondness. It’s one of your favorite feelings, and you’re so glad Peter gives you them.
You listen to him, taking deep breaths. He takes the opportunity to push himself a bit further until he’s fully inside of you. He stays still, looking at your face as you grow more comfortable. He watches as your expression contorts into desperation, which is what he’s been waiting for.
“You’re so tight, honey. But you’re taking all of me. Knew you could,” Peter reassures you, even as you clench snuggly around him. It’s embarrassingly hard for him to stay still, given how warm you feel wrapping him.
“Please move. Fuck, I need to feel you.”
Slowly, Peter removes himself and then slots in again. You remember to breathe as his movements become less languid and more fluidly quick. Soon, his thrusts have a bit of speed, causing you to scratch his shoulders at the intensity.
“You’re so big… so deep,” Your moan bounces off the walls of the room, making Peter smirk as he continues to move. His cock pins your hips, shutting down your squirming.
“No one’s ever fucked you like this? Never been this good, baby?” A small huff of his breath hit your skin and you were awed. His words alone could get you off, and then he’s pumping himself perfecting inside of you too, just making you go insane. He knows where all the right spots are, lifting up one of your legs with ease to get a better angle. You love that you can just let him take over you without having to work for your orgasm like you’re used to. You’re used to being on top, but it’s evident that Peter just wants to take care of you. He wants you to be satisfied for once, and you’ve never felt so seen. You’ve never felt so… good.
“Y-You’re the only one,” You sigh as you bite your lip, loving the way he's speaking to you. He’s all sultry in tone and even sexier with his words. You believe he has no flaws that are worth noticing.
“S’right. I’m the only one who can make you feel this good. You can only take my cock like this, deep in your cunt,” All you can do is moan and shake as you feel your next orgasm approaching.
Just when you go to reach down to your clit to push yourself even further, he reads your mind and does it for you. His thick finger circles the throbbing bud until you’re arching your back. Your fingers play with the pebbled nipples on your chest as your insides grow more tight. You haven’t had an orgasm feel this intense yet, so it’s hard to anticipate the feeling.
“Gonna come, baby? Come all over my cock, I need to see it. Need to know I’m the only one who can make you feel this way.”
With one entire pump inside of you, you’re coming over Peter’s cock and showing him that he’s the only one. All you can see is his charming, fatigued smile surrounded by stars. His brown hair is tousled and a dash of sweat is above his eyebrows, but God, he’s never looked so fucking hot.
It’s not long after that he’s coming after you, his release filling the condom completely. Peter was trying his best to hold himself for as long as possible. But with you, he discovered it was very difficult. Like he thought, the second he was inside of you, he could’ve come. You’re so slick and warm, just so alluring.
He gets up from the bed to discard the condom in done trash while you lay there in naked awe. You already know that you’re going to be sore tomorrow like the day after the gym.
As Peter comes back, he has a wipe that he uses to clean you up.
“What are you doing?” You ask before he starts to wipe you.
“Cleaning you up. You know, like aftercare. You can go to the bathroom and even take a bath if you’d like,” Peter answers while you sit straight up dumbfounded. “May I?”
“Yeah, yeah go ahead,” You allow him to soothingly clean you while you just accept it. Your mind is still whirling with confusion. Are all guys supposed to do this? Or is he really just that great? “Thank you. I… No one’s ever done that before.”
“Really? God, you were really with some twats, Y/N,” he shakes his head and walks back to the bathroom while you chuckle. It’s funny that you had to go through those two guys in order to get to Peter. Third time’s the charm. “Want to take a bath?”
You ponder for a second. You were tired, but not like you would drown in the tub. Maybe if you had better stamina you would ask Peter to join you, but for now, maybe you just need to sit and think about what’s happening alone. Peter is too good to be true. He’s such a gentleman, he never misses a beat. You hope you’re not overstepping by accepting.
“Can I? Or is it too much—”
“Nonsense, I want you to be comfortable. Now, do you like the right or left side of the bed?” You stare at him in confusion. One, because that was a random question. And two, because when did he put on boxers?
“What?”
“Which side do you sleep on?” You felt your cheeks burn for some reason, and then you realize you’re still naked while he’s semi-dressed.
“Um right, I think. Why?”
“So you can sleep there. You are staying, aren’t you?” Peter’s cheeks tint rosy red, that peek of nervousness shining through. It made you smile because even if he seems too good to be true, there is a little human in there who’s just like you.
“Yes, of course,” You can visibly see his tenseness fade as a small smile grows on his lips.
“I’ll start the bath then get you some clothes then, or else you’ll keep me hard all night.”
Your skin burns, but you feel like that’s not the last time that will happen to you. Not with Peter. No, you know.
thank you all for being patient!! i also think this is the longest taglist i’ve ever had, so thank you again!! ���
taglist:
-> @motheroffae @noa217 @nelly-belly97 @spidermanffh3000 @httpscomexe @mysticdaisy21 @emilyparkerholland @deathst9r @ellenita98 @ellabellabus07 @mrstealuregirl @bisexual-desi @sherlockstrangewolf @madsttx @graywrites20 @bradtomlovesya @princesspannnn @sageisswaggg @purplerose291 @girlbossnancy @lockwood-lover @marzipaanz @eatshitanddiee @invisibletrolleyson-jeremy @lnmp89 @crybabyddl @pretty-npeach @marine-mayday @aerangi @justanotherpasserby-blog @tinafuentes @moniffazictress11 @eywaheardyou @alwaysclassyeagle @raajali3 @likeapplejuicenpeach @winuvs
crossed out= not able to tag
825 notes · View notes
answer2jeff · 6 months
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break-up, make-up.
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song : post break-up sex
warnings : fem!reader, porn with some plot, smut, unprotected piv, make-up sex, lip being needy, mentions of alcohol and smoking (tobacco), reader has scumbag friends, sad pathetic banging, intentional lowercase. (lip and reader are 18.)
word count: 3,707
authors note: this is only like my 2nd time writing smut.......
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your abdomen felt cold pressed against the marble of your bathroom counter. pulling at the skin of your face, running your fingers through your messy hair, and picking yourself apart in the mirror that doubled as a medicine cabinet. you didn't feel like yourself. you swung the cabinet open, reaching for a hard candy eyeshadow pallet, a black eye pencil so old the label had rubbed off, and a mauve-brownish lip liner.
your phone buzzed against your pocket. you groaned, dropping your products into the sink before snatching it from the depths of your jeans.
773-642-3719: party @ ashleys 2night. u coming? 2:36pm.
it must've been karina. ever since you gave her your number on your break during your waitressing shift at patsy's, she'd been trying to drag you out of the house. you couldn't blame her. mopey from your breakup, picking up as many hours as possible, spending your free time collecting coupons for shopping sprees you'd never go on to spend money you didn't have, she was sick of you ruining the atmosphere everywhere you went.
or, wherever you didn't go, more accurately.
"he's just a guy. just—go fuck someone else! who cares if he's a dick just like him. focus on the task at hand: getting laid," she told you, licking strawberry jam from the tip of her middle finger.
"i'm just gonna miss him more," you sighed, watching the clock tick as your 15 minutes of what was supposed to be relaxing free time, was going to waste.
"*** ******** is not some kind of sex god, okay? the sex was good. you can find good sex anywhere."
"whatever."
he was more than that. he was more than the sex. he was the kisses in the early mornings where you'd wake up with him in your sheets. he was the whispers of 'you're so beautiful,' and 'i love you,' whenever you doubted yourself. he was the shitty jokes and late night walks, splitting cigarettes and dabbling in gossip. he was your best friend.
but he was also the hands that slammed your bedroom door. he was also the alcohol on his breath. he was also the words that told you to 'get your shit together.' he was also the broken promises he could never keep.
but he was more than anything karina saw him as.
i'll be there :) 2:38pm.
773-642-3719: bring some1 cute with u! 2:40pm.
you stared blankly at her text.
👍 2:42pm.
bring someone with me? who the hell would i bring? daniel's working tonight. and he's not cute. well—he's not ugly, but...no. stop. just drop it. you don't need to bring a guy with you. jesus. you don't need anyone. relax.
i'm here. 12:37am.
you knocked about 3 times before a lanky, raven haired boy with puke all over his title fight t-shirt swung the door open. you looked past his shoulder to see a group of familiar faces behind him.
"please tell me that's not h—" a short blonde girl groaned before a redhead, eliza, butted in.
"there she is!" she yelled, calling karina over.
the warm glow of the living room complimented the post-punk rock that rang through the poster filled walls of ashley's house. you were met with waves from your friends. karina beamed and quickly made her way over to the front door to greet you. her chunky sandals boomed against the hardwood floor, her red solo cup nearly falling out of her hand.
"you made it!" she smiled, taking your hand and dragging you into the makeshift frat house, slamming the front door behind you. the atmosphere was uncomfortably warm. probably due to everyone sweating their asses off from drunkenly dancing and grinding on each other.
"uh, yeah—i'm kinda late. sorry."
"fashionably late," she corrected you as you followed her through dozens of other girls and into the kitchen.
you analyzed the space. you knew a couple people here, either from work or highschool, since it was the summer after senior graduation, but there were plenty of girls and guys you'd never seen in your life. for the first time in months, meeting new people was sickening. immediately reaching for the bottle of tito's to help ease your mind, eliza stopped you. she furrowed her strawberry blonde eyebrows at you, shaking her head.
"uh-uh. you're the designated driver, sweetie. we can't have you drunk, too!"
your mouth gaped open in disbelief. were you seriously dragged here just to play babysitter?
"but there's plenty else to do," karina peaked her head out of the kitchen and eyeing a couple of her friends that resided on the couch, beer bottles in hand. you couldn't help but turn your head to look, too.
"mikey's got weed," she pointed to a shirtless brunette, "and i think destiny brought some—fuckin, i don't know, xanax to cool your nerves."
you nodded, lips pulled tight in a painfully neutral expression that read 'okay' and 'fuck you i hope you break every bone in your body and live your life as a spiritless vegetable,' at the same time. your arms were crossed against your chest, your body pretty much caving in at the amount of sheer embarrassment that coursed through you.
"since you're, y'know, kinda losing it," eliza wiped the corner of her mouth where whiskey-soda had been dripping from it, pointing her finger at you. her messy red nail polish on healthy long nails taunted you.
you felt like a wad of pink chewing gum: slammed between teeth and tongue just to be spit out and drenched in spit. but you weren't useless enough to be thrown away. just stuck under a table for some gross, unsanitary bitch to pick it up again and stick it right back in her gossipy mouth. cursing yourself for being here, you stormed out of the kitchen and made your way toward the back porch.
if you left, you'd be a prude. but if you stayed and drank, kissing strangers and making up stories filled with little white lies, you'd be deemed a slut for the rest of the summer. your last choice was to stick around, being that annoying girl who smoked cigarettes outside of the party to freak people out.
and so, you did. you hung around outside, watching people come in and out. occasionally, someone would stop to ask if you were alright, if you wanted a drink, or just someone to talk to. you politely declined every time. almost like you were waiting for some other opportunity to spring up in front of you.
"hey," a voice behind you rasped.
it startled you. it was painfully familiar. so much it made your heart drop to your empty stomach. you turned yourself around, eyes met with blue orbs that stared directly into you.
there he was. lip. your lip.
except he wasn't yours. not here. not now. possibly not ever.
"oh, you've got to be fucking kidding me, gallagher."
your hands grabbed onto the wooden railing of the porch steps. hoisting yourself up, you brushed off any dirt that smeared onto your dark blue jeans. your eyes were glued to the ground as you tried to swiftly move past him the moment you could stand up.
"no, c'mon—" he pleaded, rolling his eyes and following you back into the house. he hadn't had a sip of booze. for once, his mind was completely in the clear.
eliza and karina sat on the kitchen counter, their shoulders pressed together while shared a beer bottle, possibly their 6th or 7th of the night. you seriously wondered what they even talked about. they didn't have much in common other than the fact that they both liked reeking havoc on innocent people. and you.
"did one of you fucking invite him?" you spat, stepping just a foot away from the two of them snatching the beer bottle from karina's hand, you held it tightly in your fist, your fingertips turning pink at the brute force.
"lip? yeah, i did! wait, did you guys break up, or something?" eliza laughed, twirling a red curl around her finger while she gave an obnoxious wave to lip as he stood behind you. he bit the inside of his cheek, his hands stuffed deep into his pockets and balled into enraged fists.
your jaw had been nailed to the floor at this point. karina looked down at the ground in shame. she didn't care about your 'healing' or 'getting laid.' all she cared about was stirring shit. it was such a middle school stunt for a 19 year old girl to pull. finally snapping, you slammed the beer bottle onto the ground, watching it shatter into a million pieces. clenching your teeth, you looked back up to see the disturbed expressions on your 'friends' faces. they weren't allowed to make this decision for you. you would decide if and when you were ready to act like a normal fucking person around lip.
a boyfriend wasn't the only thing you lost. you lost a friend, a piece of yourself.
hot tears pricked at your waterline. you spun back around and darted towards the front door. shoving through people, your hands grabbing onto their arms and not-so-gently moving them out of your path. you could feel lip's footsteps behind you, his pathetic whines calling out for your name; calling out for his friend ex-girlfriend.
"hey, would you just fucking talk to me? please?"
you finally stopped, taking a deep breath and letting the salty tears that streamed down your face smudge your mascara before turning to face him. the angry knit of his brows from earlier was gone. his face relaxed, a breath of relief escaping his mouth when he could finally just look at you. he took in the sight of your tears, your swollen lips, your shoulders that tensed under your jacket, the way your jaw trembled when you cried.
"i don't wanna talk," you muttered as you shook your head, "i just—i don't wanna talk here. can we go upstairs, or something?"
you stared back, half of your bottom lip barred behind your teeth, analyzing every inch of him. the way his hair that ended at the middle of his ear had grown a bit too thick, the line that formed between his chin and his lower lip when he frowned, his short eyebrows, how prominent his philtrum was, and his blue eyes that caught your attention the day you met in 10th grade chemistry. you missed the way the top row of his small teeth would beam whenever he laughed.
"yeah," lip nodded, "we don't have to be down here, alright? c'mon," he reached for your hand, tilting his head as he tried to stare into you.
you worried about forgetting the feeling of his hands gently caressing your face, rubbing your back when he held you close, twirling your hair around his fingers, when his palms would indent the plush of your thighs, or when he'd grab onto your waist when you kissed him.
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there was no way you'd ever forget now.
"jesus, lip—" you huffed through open-mouthed kisses, your fingertips digging into the flesh of his shoulders. the cold wall against your warm back made you shiver once he tore your shirt off from over your head, along with the jacket he zipped down and gently slipped it off from your arms as he trailed kisses from your jawline to your collarbones.
in the most needy, starved way possible, you tugged at his cotton t-shirt. almost as if he'd read your mind, despite him being on a completely different planet, he pulled away from your mouth and peeled his grey t-shirt off with the same hands that rubbed those fucking circles against your hips the way he always did when he kissed you again.
some things just never changed.
your fingertips pressed against his bare abdomen until they made their way up to his chest. you missed seeing that little triangle tattoo that tyler gave him in the school bathroom. kissing it, tracing your fingernails around the perimeter, occasionally biting and soothing the mark with your lips.
"fuck this stupid party," he scoffed, his hand getting a hold of your chin and tilting your head back up to face him. you looked into him through your lashes, lids low with desire. the look in your eyes ruined him.
"yeah. fuck it."
you glanced at his lips and back into his eyes, just for him to smash his mouth into yours again. it was a mess of teeth and tongue while you entangled your hands in his hair.
"shit—" lip detached himself from your mouth to fill his lungs with hair that smelled like your perfume and sex.
his hands cradled your face so gently it was like you'd break if he ever dared to let go. your hands moved over the groves of his arms and up to his shoulders over and over again, the feeling of soft, supple skin never getting old.
"c'mere, pretty girl," lip breathed against your ear, his hand wrapping your neck gently.
he desperately began sucking and biting the tender skin, coming back to comfort it with pecks and blows of fast, cool air. tuffs of curly blonde hair tickled your jawline every time. his veiny hands roamed down the sides of your torso, never traveling up, until you tried removing your bra yourself. lip shook his head, removing his hands from your hips and reaching behind you to unclip the uncomfortable fabric while you clung to his shoulders for support.
"lip—" you protested, slowly growing impatient.
"i got it, baby," he whispered, kissing your shoulder before carefully slipping the straps over your shoulders and off of your body. that pet name hadn't bounced off of his tongue and rang through your ears in weeks.
once he tossed the bra to the floor, your body relaxed as lip backed away just an inch or two to admire you. he smiled, teeth and all. maybe he really did miss you. your hands rested on his shoulders, slowly backing him up towards the bed of the guest room.
funny. you swore what you and lip had was more than the sex. and it was. you weren't lying about that. but my god, the crave for his skin against yours was unbearable. flashes of your hookups projected over your head. the moans that erupted from you while you tugged on his blonde curls for dear life as he pounded into your weeping cunt—you missed all of it.
"i can't believe you even showed up here," you muttered, using the pads of your fingertips to shove lip onto the soft mattress, silk sheets feeling cold against his back. he glared at you through furrowed brows, propping himself up on his elbows. but his expression softened when he saw you unbuttoning your jeans, zipping the fly down and hastily kicking them off.
"me? you—" he let out a shaky breath, gnawing at the inside of his mouth and sitting up right, "you haven't been out of the house for days."
he stared down at the white lacy underwear you wore, fighting the urge to get up and tear them down your ass until they fell at your ankles.
"and how the hell would you know that?"
you raised your eyebrows, signaling to lip to fall back again so you could reveal the aching bulge in his pants. that same bright smile of excitement made your stomach stir as you were unbuttoning and unzipping the denim that imprisoned his cock.
"been spyin' on you a little bit," he joked, but he wasn't totally kidding. for the past week and a half, he'd been taking 'shortcuts' to get to any destination just so he could briefly stop in front of your place. just to see if you'd ever come out and coincidentally run into him. he even started going to your usual hangout spots to see if you'd turn up.
but you never did. him even going to this party was solely based on the off chance that you might've been here. possibly with a new guy. but you weren't. you were alone. just like he often was.
"how sweet," you teased, tracing the tattoo on his chest. caving into your urges, you tilted your head lower to pet it with a kiss, your eyes closed before trailing your lips back up to his own. he huffed through his nose, laughing at your gesture. it was cute. you were cute. lips hands moved down to your hips, his fingers slipping underneath the waist band of your panties. that little puddle of arousal shining through the white fabric of your thong only egged lip on. he looked into your eyes for permission, not wasting any time to help you remove them the moment you nodded your head.
letting him pull them down the plush of your thighs, you turned just enough where you could slip them past your calf's where they pooled at your feet before finally slipping off onto the floor. a delicate hand reached to pull down the fabric of his boxers, his leaking, pink tip practically making you drool the moment his cock sprung out. the heat and humidity of the room making the thick vein down the side of his length twitch just the slightest. you felt a yearning heat build up in your core as you wiggled your hips closer.
"now," you reached between your thighs to coil your fingers round lip's hardening cock, "i need you to fuck me like you haven't gotten laid in a thousand years."
"that's pretty much what it's felt like." lip mumbled so quietly you barely caught it. he looked up at you, his hand brushing a strand of hair behind your ear before he used his thumb to caress your cheek.
"wait, you—you haven't been with anyone else?"
lip paused, realizing he admitted to not seeing a single other person since you broke up. it almost surprised you that you weren't the only one who was sex deprived.
"fuck would that do? bring you back?" he tried to laugh, accidentally gasping at the feeling of your wet cunt brushing past his throbbing dick. you noticed this, smiling back at him and slowly trying to position yourself perfectly.
"well, you have me now."
those words were all it took. with one swift motion, lip finally caught a grip on the fat of your hips, guiding you gently down his cock, your wetness making a makeshift lubricant.
"always so fuckin' wet for me," lip praised, smiling at the sight of how easily he filled you up to the brim of your cervix. watching your face contort from slight discomfort and into full bliss was his fucking kryptonite. you gasped, the immediate stuffed feeling hitting your stomach. lip winced at the tight sensation, already cursing under his raspy breath and whispering incoherent praises. "so—so fuckin' tigh...fu–ck" you gave him some time to adjust, propping your hands behind you so you could grind against him just right.
lip began rolling your hips back and forth, wet sounds of sex filling up the room. whimpers of "fuck, yes lip," and "just like that," only made his sexual frustration worse.
"'missed you so fuckin' much, baby. shit—you make me feel amazing. so, so fuckin' good." his hands dig deeper into your hips, making their way to your ass to squeeze and occasionally slap the flesh. you flinched with a moan, his dick hitting your gummy walls at a slightly different angle each time.
"m—fuck, missed you too, lip. you have no idea," your lungs begged for air, your tits bouncing slightly at the constant movement of your hips as you chased your high. you looked down at him, tears of arousal filling up your hooded eyes. lip marveled at the sight of your pleasure, inching closer and closer to cumming inside of you right then and there—but he had to savor this. grunting
how could he have waited this long to make amends with you? his groans felt like they practically echoed and bounced off of the walls. he needed to focus on your needs tonight. he pried between your crotchets, pressing his thumb against your clit and rubbing sloppy, rough circles against the bundle of nerves.
"slower, hun," you cooed, moving up and down his cock to keep his tip pounding right into your g-spot every time. the idea of staying quiet had never been this hard—but the music and shouting from downstairs was bound to cover for the two of you. lip nodded his head, slowing down his pace and gently grinding his hips into yours as his thumb remained at work.
after the few moments of pure bliss, moans and cries of lip's name coming from you that he wished would last an eternity, he felt the knot in his stomach tighten. similarly, you started forcefully catching your breath as you stared up at the ceiling. your head went foggy, every word that fell out of your mouth turning into messy gibberish. lip could tell you were close, but he wasn't quite ready to give up.
"i don't think i'm gonna last any longer," lip clenched his teeth, his hand aching from prioritizing your pleasure while his thrusts became sloppier and sloppier. he'd been fucked out without even finishing a single time.
"me neither—"
desperately trying to get a hold of yourself, your body gave out. your thighs began to shake, your cunt contracting. trying to muffle your shrieks, you cupped a hand over your saliva-slick mouth. your hips moved as fast as you could ever dreamed was possible, forcing you to grab onto lip's shoulder blades for support. lip could literally see his dick rolling up and down your stomach as he moaned your name, his eyes screwed shut. finally, just at the very last second, he took every bit of strength left in his body to flip you over, your back pressed against the sheets while you reached your climax. he pulled out with a groan, white ropes of sticky cum coating your lower stomach and the space right under your tits.
makeup sex was not how you envisioned this night would go. but how could you complain?
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803 notes · View notes
bigboysfalldeep · 9 months
Text
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As a senior officer, rookies are assigned to Raùl up to four times a year. He shows them the basics, how to stay safe, what places to avoid and simply, how to be a good cop. His newest partner just graduated from the academy about three weeks prior. Being very green, days are extremely exhausting. Nonetheless, Raùl enjoys his job a lot.
He just brought him home after a very long, draining shift, and hes happy to spend an hour alone, to relax and to do paper work. The young one is learning this soon enough, and as long as nothing eventful happens, those reports are pretty easy to fill out.
Raùl is sitting inside the car in midst an empty parking lot a little out of town, lighting a cigarette. As he takes a deep breath, he leans back against the seat. With a huge exhale, he sighs and blows smoke out of his mouth.
He checks the clock. His shift is nearly over, time to head to the station. He turns the key, and the engine roars to life, but it dies soon after. Bewildered, he turns the key again, with the same result.
Sighing again, he thinks for a second. He cant afford that car to be broken. So much paperwork. Annoyed, he reaches for the key, but as he looks into the rear view mirror, he spots a dark figure sitting on his back seat.
"What the fuck? Who are you?" He grunts angrily, but as he blinks, that figure is gone. Raùl turns around to see where that man has gone, but there is no one in sight.
His heart is racing and his breath quickens rapidly. He feels his whole body shaking in fear. "What the fuck?" Raùl exhales, and the sound of his radio spooks him. He jumps, hearing the voice of his operator echoing through the car.
"Raùl. Can you hear me?" She says, and the cop takes a deep breath.
He turns back around and leans against the seat. "I can hear you." He turns on his microphone and holds back a nervous chuckle.
"Captain wants to talk to you, you may come in." She says calmly.
"On my way." He coughs, trying his best to not show his growing anxiety.
Raùl closes his eyes and runs a hand across his face and through his hair. 'Just my nerves' he thinks, but once he opens his eyes, however, the ghostly figure is hovering right in front of his face.
Letting out a guttural scream, he cant stop it from entering his body through his open mouth. Like sticky liquid it covers the inside of his mouth, his tongue and slides down his throat. Raùl gags, and tries to grab his attacker, but it doesnt work. He reaches for his gun, the radio, but then, his throat starts burning.
Its warm, goo-like, and more and more of it enters his mouth. In horror he watches the figure disappear inside him, deeper, until its gone.
His body reacts right away, getting harder than ever before. Its a extremely weird feeling. On the one hand its disgusting, the smell and texture of it all, but on the other hand, hes getting arroused.
Raùl blinks a few times and holds his throat, and stomach still feeling that sticky liquid running down inside him. He gags again and again, a defensive mechanism, but it doesnt work at all.
His entire body stiffens harshly, as all of his muscles bulge against his now tight uniform. "What is...." He growls deeply, but suddenly, his body starts twitching.
His entire being starts tingling, as warmth fills his entire chest. Subconciously, he starts stroking himself, feeling his skin heating up even through his clothes. His breath quickens again and he desperately tries to open up his vest, to make it easier for him to breathe.
After a few failed attempts, he opens the zipper and takes a huge deep breath in relief.
Just then, the warmth starts spreading through his arms right into his fingertips. The tingling gets even worse but he cant help himself but moan in blissful satisfaction.
Still stroking himself, he feels his skin move slightly, something or someone is adjusting to his bigger frame.
Its painful yet more waves of pleasure echo through every fiber of his body.
His upper body grows heavier and the warmth keeps spreading, now, through his waist into his thighs, further down, reaching his toes.
Raùl moans again as even his cock is tingling rhythmically. It grows larger, pressing against his pants. He never felt like that before, and nothing caused him to leak precum and stain his boxers that fast.
Unable to control himself he grabs his bulge firmly, moving his hand along his ever growing shaft.
"Soo good."
A voice enters his thoughts, causing Raùl to snap out of this state of pure pleasure for a moment.
"Who are you?" He opens his mouth, but hes just drooling. Instead, hes talking to that voice inside his head.
"Im the new owner of this beautiful body."
The voice says sassily.
"What? Who?"
Unable to form a coherent thought, Raùls mind starts spinning even faster.
Just then, his mind is flooded with so many different images, thoughts and feelings, which simply overwhelm him.
All of him tells him to give in. That its okay. So easy.
"Im merging with you, Raùl." The voice says. "Ive been looking for a host for months. And watching you with those rookies made my heart melt."
Raùl leans his head back, letting out a long guttural moan at the simple thought of his new partner.
His cock pulsates happily, staining his clothes even more.
"Im sorry. Couldnt help myself." The voice giggles.
"Please....dont."
Raùl cries out, the feeling of losing control getting worse and worse.
"I want you. I need you." The voice says. "And I always get what I want."
The pressure on his body gets nearly unbearable, and with a last effort, he tries to fight back, but the batlle is already lost.
Moaning, groaning and grunting deeply, Raùl shoots load after load into his pants. His body is giving in, and that voice is embracing this fully. The eyes turn glassy and unfocus before they roll back into his head. All of the muscles are testing the limits of the uniforms fabric and his voice breaks before it stops.
For a moment, all goes numb.
Then, 'Raùl' opens his eyes, and lets out a low groan.
With a smile, he looks at his reflection inside the rear view mirror, enjoying the sight of him.
"Very nice." He growls and inspects his face, running a hand through his nicely done hair and groomed beard.
'Raùl' then inspects the rest of his body. He enjoys how it feels to be a well trained cop. His muscles flex easily, and then, subconciously, he strokes his cock through a huge wet patch.
"Fucking good." He smirks, and raises his eyebrows. "The first time is always the best."
His captain wants to speak to him. Thats going to be fun.
771 notes · View notes
rabbidbunwy · 23 days
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🔞 Gojo x reader| Minors DNI| TRIGGER WARNING 🔞
LINGERING
synopsis:He can't seem to forget that day
Featuring: Gojo Satoru-Yuji-Megumi-Nobara
Contents: Gojo Satoru x Gen!reader-explicit content-death-s*icide-reader is dead-sad-teacher!reader- angst-minor character death-hurt-no comfort?-nightmare-hallucination-sleep deprived-heavy angst-forgiviness-touching-grave visiting
i'm no english native so sorry for some mistakes
please reblog 🔁 and like❤️
@muzansslxt @candy69gurl @kiwicopia @satorkive
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Satoru arrived at school early in the morning. He parked his car and got out, stretching a little after sitting for so long. The whispers and commotion caught his attention. He furrowed his eyebrows as he heard your name. Satoru’s heart tightened, and his eyes darkened behind his glasses as he looked toward the crowd on the other side of the street. He slowly approached, his heart pounding. “What’s going on?”
"Sensei don't.. you can't" some student grabbed him stopping him "please you don't wanna see it"
The world around him faded as panic set in. “No. No, no, no” Satoru tried to push past the students, but they held him back. He wasn’t thinking. He couldn’t think about anything but you. Satoru didn’t care about anything but getting to you. “Get the hell off me!” He snapped, his voice tight and desperate.
A student held onto Satoru as more voices and whispers reached him. It sank in all at once as his chest tightened painfully until he could hardly breathe. All the color had drained from his face. It wasn’t real. This wasn’t happening. Satoru ripped away from his student and began pushing through the crowd. He reached the source of the commotion and froze.
His knees grew weak as he stared down at the ground. His eyes slowly rose to your broken, bloodied body on the sidewalk. You’d fallen from the school’s rooftop and he was no longer strong for you. He was finally too late to save you. You should have stayed with him Why did you let him let you go? Satoru fell to his knees, tears blurring his vision and choking him. “You’re not dead” he whispered to himself, reaching to hold onto you, but his hand grasped at empty space as his eyes opened.
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With a strangled gasp and tears filling his eyes, Satoru woke. Cold sweat was running down his face, and his chest ached like nothing else. He sat up, burying his face in his hands as tears streamed down his cheeks. This was the third time he’d had this nightmare. He kept reliving your death over and over. The pain, the guilt, and the grief were overwhelming, even in his dreams.
It was still dark outside. Satoru looked over at his clock - 4:03 AM. He could feel the tears still rolling down his cheeks. He quickly wiped them away, standing from his bed. There was no way he’d be able to fall back asleep. Every time he closed his eyes, Satoru would see your body on the ground.
He pulled on a sweatshirt and walked out of the room, closing the door softly behind him. It felt a little easier to breathe out in the hallway, as if it helped him separate himself from the dream. Even so, it didn’t make him feel better. He quietly went to the bathroom and splashed cold water on his face, staring at his reflection in the mirror.
When suddenly he saw a black siluette in the mirror staring at him with white eyes as it touched his shoulder cold radiating from it but when he turned around it was gone
Satoru jumped and let out an embarrassing yelp, instinctively shoving whomever had touched him. However, there was no one there and the bathroom door was shut. He gripped the edge of the sink tightly, his heart pounding. All that kept him from panicking was the idea that it was a hallucination.
He stared at the spot in the doorway where the figure had been. There was no way. No way he actually saw that. Maybe it wasn’t just a nightmare. He could have been sleep deprived and just seeing things. That made more sense than the alternative possibilities. He needed to just go back to sleep. Satoru quickly left the bathroom and went back to his room before closing the door firmly behind him.
But the siluette returned looking at him in the corner of the room,it somehow resembled you in a way,your waist distorted,bloody nose but "you" were simply staring at him
“I’m going insane” Satoru mumbled to himself as he stared back at the figure in the corner of his room. It wasn’t real. There was no way he was actually seeing you. There was nothing there, yet he couldn’t pull his gaze away from the hallucination. He froze in place, gripping his bedsheets in his fists. The figure wasn’t moving, only watching him.
"why didn't you save me?" 'you' asked in a distorted tone "i'm dead because of you"
Satoru was frozen in shock and confusion. If he wasn’t dreaming, and he knew he wasn’t, then this was more than a hallucination. This was 'you' standing there talking to him. But that should be impossible, you weren’t alive. You were dead. Yet… you hadn’t left yet. “Don’t say that.” His voice cracked and his vision blurred with tears again.
The figure still looked at him,is piercing gase deafining "why? why didn't you help me?"
Satoru’s heart squeezed tight when he heard those words come from your mouth. His fingers dug into the comforter as tears fell down his cheeks. He shook his head, his vision blurring. “Don’t say that. Please don’t say that” he repeated, almost pleading for you to be anything but that. Anything but a painful memory of his regrets.
The figure suddenly lunged at him, and Satoru let out a strangled cry as he flinched and snapped his eyes open. He was alone in his room. The clock read 7:21 am. Sunlight was filtering through the curtains on his windows. He’d fallen back asleep, but now he couldn’t tell what was real anymore. The exhaustion from having nightmares and seeing hallucinations had left him in a daze.
The next morning
"Hi Sensei!" Yuji yelled as he saw his teacher at school
Satoru jolted, quickly snapping his head to stare down at the first year who’d yelled at him. He stared down at Yuji for a few seconds before his brain decided that he was, in fact, really there. “Hey, kid.” He forced a smile and ruffled Yuji’s hair, hiding the fact he was still in a daze.
Maybe he should sleep more. Satoru had already experienced several nightmares and hallucinations just today, and he wasn’t even fully awake yet. “Sleeping enough, Yuji?” Satoru asked, attempting to distract himself and appear as natural as possible. Yuji had probably never seen him anything less than perfect. He had to hide this strange experience from everyone.
Yuji grinned and nodded, his smile as bright and naive as usual. It was one of the few times he wasn’t covered in scars and cuts. “Yeah! I slept really well last night” Yuji replied happily. He was oblivious to the fact that Satoru hadn’t actually slept last night. “When’s training today?”
Satoru had completely forgotten about training today, but that was a welcome distraction. “As soon as I get my coffee” he replied, letting out a sigh. He needed a distraction and caffeine would definitely keep him awake now. Besides, he couldn’t be that far from well-rested. “Let’s go.”
Gojo was about to press the chosen coffee button machine when he still saw you in the reflection of the automatic machine
No. No, not again. He’d already hallucinated twice and now again? It couldn’t be real, this was another hallucination. He needed a lot of coffee. Satoru quickly stabbed the button, his gaze never leaving your reflection.
The pressure was building up the longer the shiluette was staring at him but it broke when Yuji spoked "Sensei? everything okay?"
He had just managed to distract himself for a few seconds, but Yuji’s voice snapped his focus back to reality. Satoru glanced at Yuji, giving him a small reassuring smile. “Yeah, I’m fine” he lied. “Just didn’t sleep well last night, that’s all.”
There was no need to worry Yuji. Satoru was supposed to look after him, not the other way around.
"it's about y/n is it?" he asked approaching his sensei
Satoru tensed slightly at the name, his eyes widening for a moment. He tried to conceal the surprise and discomfort at having been seen through so easily. “Why would you say that?” He mumbled, still avoiding Yuji’s gaze as he leaned against the counter.
"Because…" Yuji sighed taking a breath "because…i ..we see you're more distant,you...you never stop looking at the place caressing it in where they died with a sad, guilty look" the boy breathed shaking "and also because we see that sometimes you talk to 'someone' even tough there's no one"
Satoru stiffened when Yuji mentioned seeing him touching where you died. He knew he had a habit of doing so without thinking, but he didn’t realize just how obvious he must be. The boy also seemed to know he’d been seeing 'you' lately. Had he truly become that obvious?
“I’m fine, kid” Satoru tried to insist again, but his mask was slowly cracking.
"you're not sensei" Yuji spoke trembling "it..it's not your fault if y/n sensei died,they..they…just.." the boy grabbed his arm as he tought whenever or not saying or not,he didn't wanted to be the victim here
“Yuji, stop.” Satoru warned as he tried to jerk his arm away, but Yuji’s grip was firm. He stared at the boy, his eyes hardening. “You don’t understand.” Satoru hissed, his voice becoming tense. This wasn’t something he should talk about. No one should have to deal with his guilt and grief, especially not his students.
"i am!" Yuji shouted "because" Yuji stopped biting his lip "you weren't there when i tried to stop them!" he sobbed covering his eyes with his sleeve "so don't tell me that i don't understand!"
Satoru stiffened, his eyes widening slightly at Yuji’s words. He stared at the student in disbelief, not knowing how to respond. How the hell was he supposed to respond? It was his fault. Satoru hadn’t been there that day, and he hadn’t saved you. Even Yuji had tried to save you, but no one had succeeded.
Yuji let out strained choked sobs "i miss them Sensei"
He reached out and pulled Yuji into a hug, wrapping his arms around the boy. “I’m sorry, Yuji” he whispered, clenching his eyes shut tight. He hadn’t seen how much Yuji also needed this comfort and closure. Satoru had been so focused on himself that he hadn’t realized he wasn’t the only one suffering from your loss. He rested his chin on Yuji’s head and squeezed him tightly, his heart aching.
You were like a parent to Yuji and when the boy remember it he letted out a deafeaning bloodcurling anguished cry as he sunk in Gojo chest
Satoru held him tighter, tears filling his eyes and streaming down his cheeks. It was breaking something inside of him to hear Yuji cry like that. It made him realize how much they had all lost. His family had been torn apart in front of him, and he hadn’t been able to do anything about it. Satoru took shaky, shallow breaths as he tried to rein himself in so he could help Yuji, but it was becoming increasingly difficult.
They stood there for what felt like hours, both of them grieving and letting their sadness wash over them in waves. Satoru’s own grief, the exhaustion, and everything felt more than enough at this moment to break him. Yet, he somehow managed to hold himself together for Yuji’s sake. He gently guided the young boy to a seat, sitting beside him and draping an arm over his shoulders. Satoru let Yuji lean into him for comfort, trying to keep himself under control.
“It’s going to be okay” Satoru whispered, his voice quiet in an attempt to be soothing. He didn’t believe his own words, but he wanted to try. They both needed a little hope right now. “We’re going to be okay” his voice cracked and he squeezed Yuji lightly. “I promise,” he added, his heart clenching painfully. Satoru only hoped it wasn’t another empty promise.
Gojo could saw you again but you were slowly clearing smiling "thank you" you said before fading away
Satoru couldn’t help but smile sadly as you faded away. He knew you weren’t really there, but the sight made him calmer somehow. It was like you were granting him a little forgiveness. “Thank you…” he repeated, his voice a whisper. He rested his chin on Yuji’s head again, taking in a deep and shaky breath. Maybe he would finally be able to start healing now.
Perhaps your soul had been trying to give him a sense of closure all this time. Satoru leaned back in the chair, staring at the spot where you had vanished. As he held Yuji tightly and comforted him, he felt a sense of relief wash over him. You weren’t really gone, and maybe, he could start to accept that he had your blessing.
He would do his best to take care of Yuji and make sure he had the support he needed. He would continue to train him and guide him like you would have, and he would ensure that Yuji never blamed himself for not being able to save you. There was no need for regret, after all. Satoru gently ran his hands through Yuji’s hair, offering a small smile. “I don’t think they would want us to mourn forever” he whispered.
“They’d probably want us to be happy…” he added, looking down at his student. Seeing Yuji’s tear-stained face was difficult, but at least he was letting out his feelings instead of struggling to keep them bottled up. “And they want us to keep pushing forward.” Even still, Satoru couldn’t help but miss you.
The pain of losing you would never truly fade. It would always remain, a constant reminder of his failure and the love he had lost. But perhaps it was time to start trying to move on. To start living again and not focus too much on the past. After all, you wouldn’t have wanted Yuji or him to suffer like this.
Bonus:
They had gathered at your grave once more, each of them holding a bouquet of flowers or a small gift to lay beside the headstone. Megumi was uncharacteristically somber as he placed his own bouquet next to the rest, his expression dark and drawn. Nobara held a box of your favorite sweets, her usual upbeat attitude replaced by a quiet sadness. Yuji stood silently, gazing at your name on the stone with a sense of loss in his eyes.
And finally, there was Satoru, standing off to the side with a thoughtful expression. His eyes were clouded by a mixture of grief and guilt, but he remained standing quietly, observing the others. He had placed his own flowers beside the headstone, a bouquet you’ve always liked. Despite the pain of the loss, they were all together. And maybe that was enough.
“It’s been a year…” Gojo murmured, his voice unusually soft. He stared at your name, a bittersweet smile tugging at his lips. “I can’t believe it’s been a full year already.” He felt the familiar pang in his heart as he looked at the others, all of them clearly struggling to keep their emotions in check.
Nobara was sniffling, tears streaming down her cheeks despite her obvious effort to remain strong. Yuji had his head down as he tried to hide the fact that he was shaking. Megumi stood silent, staring at the tombstone with a stoic expression, but his body language betrayed his own pain.
It was obvious they were struggling with the same guilt and lingering pain that had haunted them all for the past year. They had lost someone who mattered deeply to each of them, and it didn't matter how much time passed, the wound would never fully heal.
Gojo could feel his own heart ache as he watched them mourn. He wanted nothing more than to somehow bring you back, but he knew how futile that wish was. Everyone was trying to move on, but there was a part of them all that was still stuck in the past, clinging to the memories of you.
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raffe156 · 1 year
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Spoils of War
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Pairing: John Price x f!reader (Tank) OC
Warnings: Smut/nsfw, 18+, unprotected sex, mentions of violence, Possessive Price, Dom!Price, rough sex, age gap in my head Price is 41, fluff at the end
Summary: You make Price jealous, end of hahaha 
A/N: Thanks for so many likes and reblogs on my last post! Possessive Price has got me in a hold and I really like this MC and Price dynamic, got more ideas and wips for them :)    @yeyinde and @irnbru32​ this one's for you two!
Please as always comments and feedback welcome 
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Call of duty characters - Only Tank
3:00am 
You glanced at the alarm clock on the small side table. You knew you needed to get up, but Price had you trapped under his arm you were tucked right into him. His soft snoring in your ear. You traced a scar on his forearm the hair had not quite grown back. The man was like a space heater, you could feel it coming off his bare chest. You were just in his T-shirt but you could feel yourself sweating. The Ac unit had broken days ago on the Los Vaqueros Base, you had asked Alejandro to fix it god knows how many times only for him to respond with “Maybe you shouldn’t be wearing so many layers querida” followed by Rudy apologising for his Captain.
You tried to turn yourself in the small cot so you could put your foot on the floor, but Price gripped you tighter to him.
“Not trying to do a smash and dash are you love?” - The sleep was thick in Prices voice. You turned your face back to him.
“Yeh your my 1am booty call John…I’ve got Ghost pencilled in for 3:30…” - You laughed, but you noticed the change in his body.
“Oh I'm joking John…I need to make sure Im at least back on my side of the base before everyone wakes up…can't be seen doing the walk of shame back from my Captain's room can I? knickers in my pocket…speaking of which can I have them back please…their on your desk” - You sat up on your elbows. Price looks over at his desk your black underwear draped over his desk lamp.
“No…Keeping them thanks…spoils of war and all that lot” - He mirrored your body sitting up on his elbows a smirk on his face.
“Spoils of war?…John you can't keep my knickers…I'll take your boonie hat then...I think I'd suit it” - You got up moving over to the desk to swipe your underwear and his beloved hat his top just covering your arse. Your weren’t fast enough he was up and already at the desk your underwear in his fist, he gave your arse a slap for good measure.
“Now now…got to be quicker than that love, even half asleep you can't beat me” - He was feeling cocky now. He eyed you up and down god did you look good in his T-shirts. He leant back against the desk you could see the outline of him in his boxers, fuck he was handsome. You slinked over wrapping your arms around his neck hugging your own elbows noses pressed together.
“It’s ok you keep them…ill ask Simon if I can have my lace ones back…” - you sighed leaving the whisper of a kiss on his cheek. You pulled away feeling pretty smug with yourself.
Why was he feeling like this? He knew you were joking, but the image of Ghost with his hand on you…you clawing at him while he’s buried deep in you. Him hearing the soft sobs as you cum saying his name…his tongue all over you…Price felt like his blood had turned to acid and it was boiling through his muscle into his bones.
“Have you seen my pants…cause your not keeping them as well…” - You looked over at Price, he looked like a storm cloud.
“what’s the matter? You know I'm joking don't you?” - you walked back over to him cupping his face. Your eyes were pleading with him. You and your big mouth. Price didn’t say a word instead he started kissing you, but it was all teeth, biting greedy, rough.
“Mhmmm….slow down John…”- You tried to pull away but he had you locked in his arms, he moved down to your neck, biting and sucking at it so it left marks. He wanted to mark you as his.
“John don’t, your going to leave marks and I'm not wearing a neck gaiter for the next few days in this heat…ahhh!” - he had bit your shoulder.
“Call me John one more time I dare you…I'm your Captain and I think you need reminding of that” You could feel him on your thigh he was hard, and you couldn’t lie it was making you wet.
“Yes Sir….Captain” - Your heart was racing.
“That’s better…on your knees” - He said pulling his cock out of his boxers, the tip already leaking, you did as you were told.
“Open your mouth…tongue out” Price could see you squirming on your knees. He was going to enjoy this he thought as he slapped his cock off your waiting tongue. You wrapped your mouth around him softly licking the underside of his head. You looked up at him as he slid further down your throat.
“That’s a good girl…” - His hand snaking up into your hair.Price growled as you took him as deep as you could, He was moving your head for you, he hit the back of your throat causing tears to well up in your eyes, he wiped them away with his thumb and pulled out leaving you drooling and gasping for breath but it was short lived as he thrust himself back down your throat and held you to his base your tongue flat to his balls. You tapped his thighs. Fuck the oxygen was leaving your brain, but you could feel how wet your were.
“Alright, easy now take a breath” - Price pulled your head back, saliva on your chin, he wanted to ruin you. You were trying to steady your breathing, you liked this game and wondered how far you could push your Captain. Price could see the look in your eye you were scheming, well he was going to put a stop to that.
“You have 5 seconds to get on the bed…or I'm using my belt on your arse”- He stepped away from you reaching for his pants to unloop the belt his cock bobbing against his stomach. You didn’t waste any time getting to your feet and crawling on to the bed where you waited for further instructions from your Captain.
“Good girl, 6 seconds, but i'll let you off this once…” - he slapped the belt together. It made you jump but the spring in your stomach said otherwise. Price grabbed your wrists slipping the belt over them pulling it tight. More marks you thought. He raised them above and over your head leading you to lie on your back arms reaching towards the top of the cot, tying the other end to the metal rail headboard. A nervous laugh escaped from your mouth. Price noticed you pull your knees up defensively. He cocked his eyebrow at you not a chance your were hiding now. He bullied his way between your thighs pushing your knees apart leaving your bare. He loved the sight of you spread out for him on display, loved the way you couldn’t help buck your hips up. Loved the way your squirmed under his gaze like it was burning you. He was right his gaze was searing into your skin causing your blood to rush and thunder in your ears. You were begging him with your eyes to brand your skin with his touch.
“Look at you…all laid out for me…or would you prefer Ghost between your legs looking at your wet cunt?” - He was smirking as he traced the inside of your thigh with his rough hand, his thumb grazing over you slit. You were feeling brave and wanted to see how far you could push your luck.
“Ghost would already be eating me out like it was his last meal” - Your grin bit at him you could see it in his eyes. Price knew you didn’t mean it you were trying to get a reaction out of him, but he couldn't help the image that formed in his mind.
“Oh I’m sure he would…in fact I know he would be, any of the men on this base would be I wouldn’t blame them either” - Price lowered his head , you could feel his breath on your sensitive skin an inch away from your throbbing cunt.
“I've seen the way they all look at you…wondering what you sound like when your moan, when your begging for it, how you would feel pressed against them tight and hot…” - Price swipes his tongue flat over your folds, flicking the tip off your clit. He takes a quick glance up at you you face is buried in the crook of your elbow, he can hear your panting the dry heat suffocating you. He’s toying with you but your answer got you what you wanted, you always got what you wanted with your Captain, his face buried in you his beard rough on your inner thighs. It was short lived just as you were wading in, Price removed his mouth and replaced it with the sting of his hand the pain spreading up your body.
“For fuck sake…” - You where reeling at the sudden shift in touch. Price gave you a cruel look as his fingers prodded into your cunt thick and heavy, curling up hitting you just right causing a choked moan to escape, his thumb pressed against your clit, rubbing tight circles. You eyes screwed shut as he applied pressure to your abdomen.
“Fuck…John, please…” - Your pleas cut short as he corrected you with another slap to your pussy.
“What did I say about calling me John?…I'm your fucking Captain…”- Price was enjoying this and he couldn’t help feel sorry for you, but you need to be taught a lesson. He sat back resting your legs over his bare thighs he loved the dirty scowl on your face. He gives you that eye crinkling smile but it's laced with smugness and you wanted to kick it off his face. Before you get a chance to kick out Price lines himself up with your centre, rolling your clit with his tip coating himself with you, it sends sparks up your spine that crackle through your nerves. He slides his T-shirt up your body exposing your hard nipples kissing in-between them, rough, nipping kisses, he sucks a bit too hard on one of them leaving a pink hue that will bloom into a dark purple love bite by the time the sunrises.
“Please…Sir…” - Your begging his cock resting at your entrance you can feel your walls clenching around nothing and your really cant help let out a little sob the frustration getting to you.
“That’s a good girl…see your….learning” - Price rammed his cock in, not giving you the time to adjust around him like he usually does. No his rhythm is heavy and powerful each one you feel him at your cervix, you arch your back while your bitten breasts bounce with every thrust. You cant even choke out a moan, the sound of his hips connecting with your arse and thighs is obscene also his swings are causing the headboard to hit the wall, someone was going to hear you.
“Think Ghost or Soap could fuck you till you couldn’t speak love?…After the other night I bet they have wanked themselves dry at the sight of your naked wet body…but i'm telling you now i'm going to make sure they know how good you get it from me…” - he growls, slamming back into you making your eyes roll back in your head. Your caged under him his arms resting either side of yours, he wants to hear you, he needs to hear you. He starts to bite at your neck, licking it his beard scratches you face. There your on the edge he's dragging your walls with every pull of his hips, its pooling in your stomach your going to snap open. You want him to snap you open.
“OH FUCK!…” - You cum, your legs shaking around him its loud, but you don't care.
“Feels to fuckin good love, your so fucking tight, want me to fill you up…” - Price can feel your walls tightening around him pushing him into his own realise.
“YEs…Plea…Fuck me…i want your cum in me Captain!” - You sob the words out, desperate. Price is drunk on the sounds your making as he fucks you rough and hard, the sounds filling the small room, he groans loudly as he cums inside you, panting your name.
He falls to the side of you his cock still twitching inside you, he presses his forehead to your temple. You both try to catch your breath. Price reached up to unbuckle the belt from your wrists, the skin scorched from the rough fabric. He made a mental note to kiss them better later.
“So does this mean I can have my knickers back?” - Your voice is wrecked and dry as you turn your face into him.
“No and dont ask again” - He chuckled lifting his head up to kiss you softly this time. Priced wrapped his arm around you tightly. You were back in the same position as when you woke up you glanced over at the alarm clock 3:35am
“Shit i'm late to meet Ghost…” - You laughed ringed around the room. Price looked at you like your were deranged a smirk creeping at his mouth.
“Really woman? Your going to be the death of me?” - He nudged you back into him, You laughed.
“No really John…I need to get up…In 10mins everyone is going to be gearing up for the brief with Laswell and I don't want to be scurrying back to my room with the best part of you running down my leg thanks” - You tried to push your way up, but he was stronger despite being nearly half asleep again.
“John…really…let me up” - You really were struggling now. Price wasn’t budging he wanted you to stay there with him in your own little bubble, because once you left this room you both had to resume your roles, him making sure you didn’t get yourself killed, you barking back at him for doubting you.
He made another mental note to ask you when this was all over out on a date, dinner and drinks, but for now he was happy like this in your little bubble.
“shhhh shhh…love just give me 5 more minutes” - He felt the lull of sleep pulling at him, his mind showing him the life you both could have together, he could hear you laughing, sing song voice as you danced around the kitchen belly round with his baby glowing and beautiful, two more running at him hands open and sticky. He wanted that and he was going to do everything he could to get it.
2K notes · View notes
holdmytesseract · 1 year
Note
So, there's this song that I've been listening to non-stop.
Kind of an oldie...with Robbie Williams. LoL.
I imagine a scenario in my head of Reader and Loki who were once in a relationship and had a falling out (because of whatever reason - maybe of his insecurities). But he sees that the Reader is fine after the break up (she isn't really, she just acts like it) and it bothers him that they moved on so quickly.
But he tries to get her back because he really does love her 😍. I thought this would be so cute.
Resurrected Love
Loki Laufeyson x fem!Reader
Summary: What once had been undying love between you and Loki, had seemingly turned into dust. After the breakup, the god just isn't himself anymore; barely coping with losing the love of his life. Unlike you. You seem to be just fine; having moved on quickly. Or was it just an illusion? Nevertheless, Loki decides to try to get you back. Will he be successful?
Warnings: sadness and heartbreak, thirst? angst, swear words? suggestive smut, fighting/shouting, fluuuff - tell me if I forgot something!
Word Count: 4,5k
a/n: Ahhh first of all, I'd like to apologise... Sorry @mochie85 that this took me SO long... 🥺 Thank you again for making me the incredible Baby Fever mood board! 🥰 I hope you like this little present I got in return! ☺️💝
Tagging: (In the comments!)
Masterlist °☆• Loki Masterlist
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The blaring sound of the alarm clock ripped the sleeping god out of his peaceful slumber. Groaning, Loki moved his hands from underneath his pillow and instead buried his head underneath said pillow. Bare, muscular arms pressed down on the soft, fluffy cushion; trying to drown out the noise. In vain.
A deep, husky grumble left his sore throat, before he reached out blindly to shut off the alarm. Tossing and turning in the bed, he came to lay on his back; big palms running over his face and rubbing his tired eyes. A few rays of sunshine peeked through the emerald green silk curtains; illuminating his small, cosy bedroom. Loki sighed and stretched; causing the light duvet to expose his bare torso. His gaze was directed towards the ceiling; idle and aimless. The god could still feel the tiredness and exhaustion in his bones. Not his physical, though. His mental exhaustion. It just wasn't the same since you were gone. Since you packed your bags and walked out of his apartment. Out of his life. He could sleep for hours and yet he didn't find rest. His bed was so small, but without you he was afraid to get lost in it.
Not even five minutes later, his alarm clock told him again to stand up - and he had no other choice but to give in. Shutting it off, he sat up in bed and rolled out of the comfortable confines. Sighing, he pulled the curtains to let the first rays of sunshine into his bedroom, before he slumped to the bathroom. Dressed in nothing but black briefs, Loki came to stand in front of the mirror of his cabinet, hanging above the sink. He couldn't help but to look at himself. Look at the picture of misery he had become. Dark rings were underneath his eyes. His hair was tousled and resembled more a bird's nest, than a glorious, untamed mane of a god. Fingertips grazed his cheeks and chin; feeling the black, scratchy stubble which had grown so wildly. He had let himself go since you were gone - and he knew it. But it had been pointless. Sure, eye circles, messed up hair and a wild beard was nothing a bit of seidr couldn't fix, but... It couldn't fix his broken heart, so what was the point in using it?
Nevertheless, the god was forced to regain his 'good looks'. There was a very important meeting today. A meeting he couldn't skip like the last ones. Thor would bite his head off, if he wasn't going to appear. After all, this meeting was about his future... With another deep sigh, Loki went to work. He took a shower first; cleaning his ethereal body and godly locks. After that, he shaved; getting rid of his beard. Once his skin was as smooth as it could get and clean shaven, he got dressed; slipped in one of his finest suits. Loki absolutely wasn't in the mood to leave his apartment - but he had to. And so, the god closed the door behind himself, already regretting it.
Absent-minded Loki walked through the white, plain hallways of the S.H.I.E.L.D headquarters; on his way to meeting room number 204. He wasn't paying attention to his surroundings, and so it came how it had to come. The god ran into somebody. His hard, strong chest collided with a way smaller, softer body. "Norns," Loki cursed under his breath, "Apologies. I don't know what-" but stopped dead in his sentence, when he registered who he ran into. "Y/N..." Your name fell from his lips so easily, and yet it felt like he was committing a crime.
You were standing in front of him, like frozen to the ground. It was the first time he was seeing you since the breakup almost a month ago. Sure, he hadn't left his apartment in that time, but he had heard from his brother that you had been away a few weeks on vacation - and it seemed like it did you really good. Of course couldn't the god help himself but to ran his eyes over your body. You wore your familiar shield uniform. The one he had ripped off your body countless times. Your Y/H/C hair was loose; framed your face beautifully. Unlike Loki's face, yours looked well-rested and refreshed. No bags or dark circles underneath your eyes. All in all, you looked recovered and yes, happy. Not in the slightest hurt or broken - like him. His eyes travelled upwards. Loki knew he was on a self-destructive path, but what was he supposed to do? His heart was screaming at him; yelling from the top of his lungs to give into it. Oh how much he loved you. Still. And then it happened. His deep blue eyes collided with your Y/E/C ones - and suddenly he felt like drowning; the world burning to ashes right in front of him. It brought back everything. All the memories. Good ones and bad ones. And all the pain.
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"Lokiii!" You yelped, as he wrapped both his strong arms around your thighs and lifted you off the chair; hindering you from decorating the Christmas tree with another bauble. "Let me down!" Smiling, the god shook his head and tightened his grip a bit - only to let you know that he had you. To show you that he would let nothing happen to you. "Not until you finally speak your mind, darling." "W-What do you meeeeean?" You shrieked up, as Loki carried you away from the safety of the chair. "Tell me, if we can finally call ourselves a couple." You blinked down at the handsome god, who threw you that smouldering look which turned your knees into jelly. "I-I, uh..." He smiled again, winking. "Come on, darling." You couldn't help but giggle; shaking your head. "Lokes... We didn't even have our first kiss!" "Oh, that can be changed in a heartbeat," he purred and let you down quickly. Before you could even catch up to what was going on, his perfectly shaped lips danced with yours.
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"L-Loki, p-please, I-" You moaned helplessly; writhing on the sheets beneath him. "Shhh, my goddess," he shushed you immediately; interrupting you. "Don't speak. Just feel," Loki panted; nipping at the inside of your thighs, before hypnotising blue eyes meet yours; pupils blown wide with lust. The god wore a smouldering, yet dangerous smile. A predator looking at his prey. You were completely at his mercy - and you loved every second of it.
Your hand found its way into your lover's hair; finger winding through those long raven curls. You gently tugged; nudging him on to finally do something. "Please..." You whispered; breathless. The hairs on the back of your neck raised up, when Loki gave you another smouldering smile, before he lowered his head. Your breath hitched; a chill ran down your spine at the anticipation. You knew what was to come - but you'd be never prepared for it.
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"Darling, please." Loki's voice was unstable, pleading; on the verge of breaking - filled with pain and regret. Tears shimmered in his eyes. Tears of despair. Not hope. He felt like the ground fell out from underneath his feet. He was losing his grip; felt like falling into an abyss of darkness - blindly.
You shook your head, as you threw the last item of clothing in your suitcase. "No, Loki. No. Don't 'darling' me. Please don't make this even more difficult as it is." The god watched you helplessly; running a hand through his hair. "If it is so difficult for you, then why don't you just stay?" He sounded so sad. So... desperate. You swallowed hard; jaw clenching in order to suppress your own tears, before you turned to face your now ex-boyfriend. You looked him straight into the eyes, but with the seconds ticking by in silence, you avoided your gaze again - unable to stand the hurt, wounded look in his blue orbs. "Because I can't, Loki. I just can't. Don't you see? I cannot do this any longer." Now it was Loki who swallowed. "I-I understand that, lov- Y/N, but please... Give us another chance. Let us keep fighting for this love!" You snorted out a bitter laugh at his words; "Fighting, he says..." shaking your head. "I already fought so hard and long for this! For us! But apparently you were too blind to see." Your nerves were on edge; stressed out by the past weeks. "I tried and tried and tried to get through to you, but all you ever did was shut me out!" Loki wanted to answer something; opened his mouth to speak, but you immediately cut him off.
"Don't you dare pull the 'I don't understand you' card now! Because it isn't true! I do understand you! I always did! This was never our problem!" You were almost shouting by now; all the bottled-up emotions exploding within you. "You know what the problem is, Loki, huh?! You know what?!" His chiselled jaw flexed. You could tell that he was losing it as well. "Tell me, Y/N! Tell me!" He shouted; gesturing around wildly. "Scream it to me, if you have to!"
You took a few dangerous steps closer, before whispering: "Your damn insecurities." Loki gasped; almost stumbling backwards. This hit hard. Bore a knife straight through his heart - and yet he knew, that it was true. And the realisation of it made him even more angry. On himself. His hands clenched into fists; desperately trying to keep his cool. Unsuccessful.
An almost maniacal laugh escaped his lips. "Oh, I am the problem now?!" "Yes! Because you never managed to let your damn guard down around me! We've been together for over almost two years and you still don't trust me enough to just let me in! I know that your childhood and past was not easy and quite dramatic, but you can't just hide yourself away from the rest of the world for eternity!" You snapped; taking deep breaths and let the accusing words you just spat at Loki sink in. Loki said nothing; just stared at you. "Because if you do, it's going to eat you up inside someday..." You added in a way quieter voice; almost whispering. Then you returned to the bed, in order to zip the suitcase shut.
Behind you, Loki sunk to his knees; the harsh truth and reality finally hitting him full force. He knew. He had always known, and yet he couldn't bring himself to open up. He tried to fight his demons a million times, but he always lost the fight. He should've tried harder - better, because now... Now it was too late. He had lost you - because of his insecurities. Tears streamed down his face, as he started one last attempt to stop you from walking out of his life. "Y/N, p-please, please... I am so sorry, I am so sorry. Please... I-I can't lose you. If you leave m-me now... I-I'll drown a-and sink."
You swallowed hard; tried to fight against the desperate screams of your heart to stay. You had never seen him so... lost and vulnerable before. It tore at your heartstrings. But you had to do this now. There was no going back. "I'm sorry, Loki, but like I said... I can't. I can't keep fighting against the walls you have built up around you." With those words, you walked past him, "Goodbye, Loki." and out of his bedroom - out of his life. It broke him and his heart. He was nothing more than a wreck after that day.
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Loki swallowed hard at the vivid memories, playing out in his head. He had to fight hard to not lose it completely in front of you and to not break down and cry. As for you, you seemed to be completely fine. "Loki." You said in a regal voice, giving him a nod - as if you didn't have a whole lot of history together. As if you never had told each other all of your secrets and wishes. As if you never had shared the deepest bond possible between human beings - mentally and physically. You greeted him like you were nothing more like acquaintances. It hurt Loki; bothered him, how quickly you had moved on. So, he tried to hide his emotions and not letting show how much of a wreck he was.
"What..." His voice cracked, so he cleared his throat quickly. "What brings you here?" The god asked; gesturing blindly towards the meeting room. "I, um, I was assigned to overwatch the meeting." Loki's eyes widened at your words, so you quickly added: "Believe me, I don't like it, too, but it is how it is." Don't like it too? Loki asked himself. Norns, he could've screamed from the top of his lungs how happy he was about this. Just to be able to see you without an excuse for a longer amount of time was like heaven for him. He wanted to answer something, but was interrupted by the arrival of Nick Fury, some of the Avengers and a few other S.H.I.E.L.D agents. "Loki, Y/N," the man with the eyepatch greeted you, before he opened the white, wooden door for everyone to get inside. "Let's get over with this, Laufeyson." Loki swallowed hard, then nodded obediently and stepped inside the big, barren room.
Throughout the whole process, Loki couldn't focus. His thoughts were circulating around you. It was all he could think about. He was so absent-minded; he didn't even listen to the others talking. Only the voice of Fury caused the god to snap out of his trance like state. "Well... It seems everybody has the same opinion..." The man with the black coat started, before he turned to face Loki directly, who sat at the very top of the table. "S.H.I.E.L.D and the United States of America allowing you to stay - as long as you're going to play by the rules." Loki swallowed and nodded - still not entirely present in his mind. "You improved; did a great job as an Avenger. Keep it up, Laufeyson."
Fury's words were the last ones of the meeting. Most agents scrambled to get out of the room; having other duties to tend to. Most of the Avengers clapped Loki on the shoulder or gave him a short nod of approval - and you? You were watching him from the sidelines. Seeing him again after almost a month had caused your feelings to run wild again. They were so quiet and chilled during and after your holiday, and now? Just one look was enough to set everything on fire again; storms battling within you. You wanted to scream, you wanted to cry - but most of all, you wanted to run. That's what you did. You fled from the meeting room; unable to be in his presence a second longer. When Loki settled his look on the chair you sat in, it was empty. Scanning the room for you wasn't fruitful as well. He sighed. You had left already, of course. Why shouldn't you? It had been nothing more than a job for you. Nevertheless, it was another small cut into Loki's already bruised and battered heart.
From that day, where once again his fate had been decided, he started to see you more often. Probably because he left his apartment more often as well now. He started to find hope again and decided to not just give up on you. Loki had made that mistake once - and he'd never let it happen again. He wasn't just giving up. Oh no... Now he was really going to fight for you, because one thing was certain... He still loved you with all his heart and he wanted you back. For good this time.
Over the next days and week, Loki repeatedly placed little cards, gifts or flowers in front of your office in the S.H.I.E.L.D headquarters. It was an easy task for him to sneak incognito inside the big building. Nobody knew and nobody recognised him. At first, you were quite confused and surprised...
You hurried to your office; messily rearranging the weapons belt around your waist on the way. You were late. Ten minutes already. Your alarm clock just decided to take a vacay today and not wake you up. "Morning, guys. Good morning." You hastily greeted everybody on your way. Once you reached your destination, you almost stumbled over the little bouquet of flowers, laying in front of the door. Y/F/F (Your favourite flowers) - your favourites. Frowning and a bit surprised, you picked the flowers up; admiring them. There was no card or such. Just the flowers. "Uh, Rob?" You asked your fellow agent, who was just passing by your office. His office was directly across yours. "Oh, hi, Y/N. Good morning." "Morning. Uh, do you know who left those flowers for me?" The man shrugged his shoulders. "Unfortunately, not, no. Sorry." "Okay..." Still frowning, you took the flowers in your office. Of course you didn't notice the craftsman, who worked on the water dispenser right beside your door. He watched you disappear inside the room with oceanic blue eyes, smiling.
That was only the start. Every day, you'd find different things on your door step. Your favourite chocolates and other sweets. Cards with little poems written on them and quotes out of books. And more flowers. Every day, you went to work with an even brighter smile, knowing that a small present was waiting for you.
You picked up the little box and opened it; finding a bottle of your favourite perfume inside. A chuckle sounded from across your office. "I think you have a secret admirer, Y/N," stated Rob, gesturing to the little present with a grin. Your cheeks reddened; nodding. "I, uh, think so too." You felt really flattered, but... Were you ready for something new? For another man after Loki? Could you imagine another man in your life who wasn't the handsome, mischievous god? You swallowed hard; staring down at the little vial in your hands. No. No you couldn't.
"Do you know who it is?" Asked Rob further, but you just shrugged your shoulders. "No, I... I have no idea. Most likely one of the other agents." Rob nodded, "Think so, too." but frowned. "You don't look really happy about it." Once more you shrugged your shoulders; sighing. "I am. I mean, it's really sweet and thoughtful, but..." "But?" Your colleague looked at you expectantly, but you didn't answer at first. And suddenly Rob had a guess. "Loki... You are still not over him, right?" Defeated, you nodded. "I never was and I think I'll never be. It seems like every decision I make, every path I choose to walk on... Everything leads me back to him. I can't forget him..." Rob looked at you compassionate. "Sounds to me like Loki is the love of your life..." You swallowed hard, in order to suppress the upcoming tears. "He is. I realise that now. Too late, perhaps..." "Do you still love him?" Rob questioned you further, "Y-Yes. I do." and placed a hand on your shoulder. "Then you should tell him." "I-I don't know, I... Excuse me." You fled into your office, closing the door behind yourself. All the suppressed feelings coming back at you; crashing down on you like warm summer rain. It was overwhelming. But could you do it? Could you go back to him?
Unbeknownst to you, Loki had heard everything. Dressed up as an electrician on his daily undercover mission. His heart beat violently against his ribcage; yearning and crying out for you. It broke him to see you so broken - but it also made him unbelievably happy, because he knew now, that you were struggling just as much as he was. That you had worn a mask all the time and just pretended to be perfectly fine. It was the sign for him to finally make his move and get you back. Back into his arms, where you belonged.
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It was Saturday evening, when Loki put the plan he made into action. He showered; then dressed up in your favourite suit of his. It was a black one. Black shoes, black trousers and black shirt. He rolled up the sleeves and left a few buttons undone - just how you liked. He applied a bit of the cologne you enjoyed to smell on him so much; and left his untamed raven curls hang loosely over his shoulders. Loki looked at himself in the full-length mirror; eyes travelling down his body. Perfect, he thought; smiling. Grabbing the bouquet of red roses on his dining table, he left his apartment and went straight to yours. To his luck, you lived in the Avengers tower as well. Benefit of being Ms. Romanoff's best friend.
Taking a deep breath, the god knocked gently on your door. The answer he received was a frustrated sigh. "Naaat, I told you I'm not in the mood tonight to go-" You had literally ripped the door open - and were now standing open-mouthed, with a bathrobe and tousled hair in front of your ex-boyfriend. You swallowed. There he stood… Your drop-dead gorgeous ex-boyfriend. "L-Loki?" You stammered out; clearly not expecting something like that to happen. The god smiled at you. "Hello, darling. Apologies for the disturbance, but... I'd like to talk to you. May I come in?" Blinking and still in some kind of shock, you nodded. Stepping aside, you let him inside. "For you," he said, once you closed the door and turned to face him. He held the flowers to you; still smiling. "U-Um, t-thank you." You hesitatingly - almost shyly took the flowers from his hands. A chill was running down your spine, when his warm, big hands grazed yours. A touch you haven't felt in weeks - months, and immediately noticed you missed a lot.
Taking a deep breath, you placed them on the little shelf beside the door. "What, um, what do you want to talk about?" The god standing opposite you swallowed hard. You could see how nervous he was - a rare thing to happen. "About us." "U-Us?" He nodded, "Yes. Us." and stepped closer; slowly taking your hands in his. Loki waited for a moment to see if you weren't comfortable with him, touching you - but you let it happen, so he continued. "First of all, I'd like to apologise. For everything. For letting you fight so hard and long without me realising. For not opening up to you like I should have, because you are right. If I don't learn to talk to the person I trust and love most in all the nine realms, then my past and all my insecurities are going to eat me up inside. I see that now." He was gazing directly into your eyes - and you could swear you were already drowning again inside those oceanic blue orbs. "I came to the realisation those past weeks, that I am not able to live without you. Without your love. I feel like I can't breathe when you're not near me. Your absence suffocates me. I love you with all my heart and soul. You are everything I ever wanted and needed. So please... Please give us another chance. I beg of you." You just looked at him, stunned; words failing you. "
"This is what my heart tells me," he continued, squeezing your hands gently. "If yours doesn't speak the same language anymore, then please, tell me - and I'll walk out of that room." Your gaze softened. You freed one hand from his gentle grasp and lifted it up to caress his defined cheek. "Loki..." You started, shaking your head. "My heart never stopped speaking your language. Never." The god gasped at your touch and words. "Does that mean you'll give us another chance?" You smiled; nodding and stepped closer to him. So close, that you were just a few inches apart. His hand left yours; coming to rest on your waist, while your palm wandered to land on his chest. "Yes, Loki..." "Really?" He breathed; overwhelmed by your sudden closeness, and, again your words. Once more you nodded; signalling him that you meant it. "Oh, darling," Loki sighed; a few tears rolling down his cheek. He leaned down, wanted to capture your lips with his - but you stopped him; placing a finger upon his lips. "I'll give us another chance - if you promise to trust me completely and finally open up to me." His eyes met yours again; blue eyes filled with love and vulnerability. "Let me help you, my love. Let me sooth all those scars your past has left on you," you whispered and pressed a soft, slow kiss on his lips. "I promise, darling, I promise - and I'll start tonight," Loki said, placing another kiss on your lips, before he took a step back and took your hands in his bigger ones again.
"Close your eyes, please." You were confused, but did what he asked you to do; closing your eyes. Suddenly, you felt how his hands got cooler; temperature dropping. "This time, I want to go into this relationship with showing you all of me. I want you to see me." You frowned, but kept your eyes closed. "And I don't mean me, being naked. You saw that quite often already." You couldn't help but giggle at his words; blushing. Loki smiled. Something you weren't able to see at the moment. "Well... If you put it that way, I am naked in front of you now nevertheless. Showing you my true self. The way I was born." You gasped; breath hitching in your throat. Now you knew what he was talking about. "Your Jotun form? You... You want to show me your Jotun form?" He never did before. It was a huge part of his insecurities. "Yes, my love. Open your eyes." "L-Lokes, you don't have to show me your Jotun form right away! I know how difficult this is for you! I know how uncomfortable it makes you sometimes!"
He took a deep breath; was on the verge of crying again. "I know, love, I know. And I appreciate this so, so much - but I really want to show you. If we begin again, we begin with honesty. No secrets; no hiding. Now open your eyes." "O-Okay." You were quite a bit nervous as well. You knew that this took him a lot of effort. Opening your eyes, you gasped; heart skipping a beat. His deep blue eyes were replaced by shimmering ruby ones. His alabaster coloured skin had turned into a soft blue. Unique ridges and patterns adorned every inch of his tall, strong body. "Are you afraid?" Loki's shaky voice cut through the silence then. You shook your head immediately. "No, gods, no! You're beautiful, Loki. Stunning, breathtakingly beautiful." His eyes widened; pure relief flooding his veins. "R-Really? You... You think so?" You nodded; cupping his cheeks. "Yes. And it's finally time for you to accept this side of you," you said, pulling Loki gently over to your bed.
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fuckmymunson · 2 years
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could you write an angst thing where reader finds out sirius only started dating her for a bet but she doesn’t take him back? like he admits to what happened and says he actually ended up falling for her but she decides to leave him anyways? idk it just pisses me off when the reader is so forgiving like i would never recover from that 💀
Liss is my Hufflepuff OC, lol. Hope you like it! Thanks for the ask♡.
ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ
When you woke up that morning, you didn't have any plans to eavesdrop on your two best friends' conversation.
It just sort of happened.
The long, old and dusty tapestry covered your entire figure, from head to toe. A clammy hand was pressed against your mouth, as you listened to a conversation that was supposed to be private. The worn material was see-through enough to let you figure out who was who, and if their voices weren't enough, you recognized the yellow and red jumpers.
“Please tell me you are joking, Lilly. Please.”
“Liss, you can’t say a thing, less to y/n.”
Your stomach twisted in anxiety; They were hiding something, a secret.
“Lilly,” Liss spoke again, she was mad, you could always figure it out by how her accent deepened. “This isn't fair.”
“I know it isn't.” Lilly agreed with her, mirroring the other girl's frustration. “I overheard it from a conversation between James and Sirius.”
Your stomach made another painful jolt at those words, your boyfriend, Sirius, was hiding something, and not only your two best friends know, James, Lilly’s boyfriend, knew too. The loud click of the clock hung up on the stone wall was all you could hear for a few minutes, minutes that felt like hours.
“I'm going to tell her,” Liss said, scoffing loudly. “This farce needs to stop.”
“Hey!” Lilly grabbed her hand before the Hufflepuff girl could walk away. “Believe me, there’s nothing more I want than to tell her what's going on.”
“And then?!”
“It's not our responsibility, Liss.”
“But as her best friends—”
“Liss! Sirius is the one who needs to be sincere about this!”
So he was hiding something. The nauseous feeling only gained weight inside your stomach, all the way to your chest. Your lungs struggled for air, the whole hallway felt suffocating, and you could taste the vomit in your mouth.
“He’s not going to! He’s going to keep lying to her! Because that's what he's been doing the past three months!” Liss practically shouted.
Three months, three months ago Sirius asked you on a date.
Three months ago he kissed you next to Blake Lake.
Three months ago he asked you to be his girlfriend.
“What do you want us to do then?” It was Lilly’s turn to shout, swinging her hands in the air.
“For Helga’s sake, for being Head Girl you are such an idiot! We have to tell her Sirius is only dating her over a stupid bet he had with the boys! I don't give a fuck if it’s not our responsibility! She’s our best friend!”
And with those three words, your whole world shattered, just like your heart.
Over a bet.
One of them stormed away, quickly followed by the other, but it didn't matter much, all you could think about was those three words.
Over a bet.
You released a breath you didn't know you were holding. The world felt distant as if someone used a spell to stop time, even the seconds felt slow; The tears were silent but the thoughts inside your head were messy and loud. The anxiety, the shock, the anger, the sadness, everything was mixed, combined into this big, green monster that threatened your satiny.
With shaky steps, you walked towards Gryffindor’s common room, knowing that's where your beloved boyfriend was going to be. And he was, leaning against the stairs as he talked with Remus.
“So I told Prongs— Oh hey, doll.” He smiled the second he looked at you, a smile that faded when he noticed your teary cheeks, your puffy eyes, and how you carried your broken heart in the palm of your hand. “What's wrong babe?”
He sounded worried, but you knew better. It was a lie, just like everything else had been, for the past three months.
Remus gasped in shock when your hand collided with Sirius's pale cheek. The whole world froze again, but this time the sadness and anxiety were far gone, there was only anger.
“What the fuck—” Sirius started, but you quickly stopped him, pushing him. You were never the one for violence, but this time it just felt right.
“What the fuck is wrong with you?” You asked through hiccups. “A bet? That's all I am?”
His grey eyes melted, you could read the guilt, but it was fake, it had to be, just like his love was, fake. Everything was fake. All the kisses, all the dates, all the late-night conversations, everything.
“I—” He said, stuttering, glancing up at you with his doe, breathtaking eyes. “I'm sorry.”
“I'm sorry.” He repeated, biting his lip.
“Over a bet.” You hissed, nostrils fluttering with rage. “And for what? To boost your pathetic ego? To prove you can pull every girl you want?”
“I didn't—” Sirius choked, with his own words, with his lies. “I tried to call down the bet, I promise.” He promised, just like he promised he loved you on your second date, holding your hand, stargazing. “I tried to when I realized I was falling in love with you.”
In love, those sweet words only fueled your anger.
Remus, who looked beyond embarrassed, stepped away, slowly, silently.
“And you.” Your attention was now on the tall boy, and he shrunk in his place. “You knew. You fucking knew!”
“I'm sorry,” Remus muttered, blushing, even the tip of his ears were crimson. “I tried to talk to them about how wrong it was—”
“Save it for later.” You snapped, flipping him off. “I wouldn't be surprised if you started dating Liss over a bet too.”
His honey eyes widened at your words. “N—no!” He replied, shaking his head. “I promise!”
“Sweetheart, please,” Sirius spoke again, diverting your attention from Remus who used it as an opportunity to run away from the catastrophe.
“Don't call me that!” The tears made their way again down your cheeks. “Don't ever speak to me again.”
“y/n, please.” Sirius pleaded, standing up. “I love you, I do. I know it was wrong, I know it shouldn't have done that.” He continued, word after word, he rambled, about how much he loved you, about how hard he fell for you, about how special you were.
“I love you.”
He was crying. The tears were like shiny diamonds, staining the marble stairs.
“I love you.” He whispered again, as the remorse and shame coated him.
Sirius shouted your name, as you walked away, away from him, from his love, from his lies. Back facing the man who fooled you. You heard his pleas, his promises, but those were lies too.
Your first relationship was over, dramatically, it even felt like a novel. That night, you laid in bed, safely wrapped under your duvet, crying your heart out, over a bet, over what could've been.
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novacqnes · 1 year
Text
pre-show ritual // ellie williams
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warning: very smutty, fingering
pairing: ellie williams x fem reader
a/n: been noticing a lot of ellie in a band posts and it got me thinking— also i didn’t have the energy to turn this into a full fledged fic so here are all of my thoughts randomly jumbled together at 3 am
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what’s a good performance without a pre show ritual…?
you were her assistant, the band’s success was more than ellie had bargained for so she sought out extra help. this included the regular coffee fetching, interview planning— at times casual sex. although it wasn’t at all your job description it became a regular thing, and to be honest you looked forward to it. she was under loads of stress being the lead guitarist and needed some sort of outlet, thus she found it in you. the opening performance was coming to a close and the crowd's chants grew even louder, fueling ellie’s ego to a dangerous level.
her fingers were slick with your wetness, pumping in and out of you with every stroke. her body was hot, raging with desire as she pressed against you. it was ten minutes till show time and ellie showed no signs of stopping. she adored the sound her name falling from your lips and your sharp cries that only seemed to urge her to continue.
“w-we have to stop—fuck—they’re probably looking for you,” you mewled, nails sinking into deep ellie’s skin. nevertheless, she persisted, slowly curving the tips of her fingers up to meet your g-spot. she toyed with the sensitive tissue, bringing her lips to the nape of your neck.
“eight minutes till the show.”
her breath was warm, raising goosebumps as she whispered, “we’ve got time.” the chants roared through the stadium, ellie’s name sticking out in all of them and it became a mission, you were going to come before she got on stage.
your legs were slowly giving out and your vision blurred as hot tears brimming in the corners of your eyes. ellie’s thumb toyed with your clit, rubbing it along the pad while simultaneously fucking you to the brink of tears. the noises filling the small room filthily were consisting of ellie’s curses, your pleas, and the slick sounds of your pussy.
“five minutes till the show.”
“fuck….i can feel it. you’re close aren’t you?” she purred, sinking her slim fingers into you with even more fervor. you could hardly produce a coherent sentence mumbling broken clauses into her ear. you wrapped around her deliciously and she knew it was a matter of time before you began to unravel.
ellie felt like she was experiencing heaven on earth. the crowd’s repetition seemed to mirror you, with each chant she was closer to bringing you to a high, one that would leave you shaking for the rest of the show. with the utmost strength and vigor, she brought her lips down onto yours, fingers reaching an unfathomable face.
“that’s it baby….come for me,” she cooed, easing you through it. you became drenched in your own arousal, nearly wetting ellie herself. she placed soft kisses on your neck as she brought fingers to your lips, ushering you to taste.
“two minutes till the show.”
“you have to go,” you whispered weakly, eyes glancing towards the clock. the shockwaves still rippled through your body but ellie couldn’t miss her performance, with a cocky smile she kissed you once more before dashing out of the room.
you slid onto the floor, gasping for air as the performance began. the deep resonance ellie’s guitar echoed through the walls, pulling you from one high to the next. she struck each chord meticulously and with intent nearly mimicking the exact way she fucked you just minutes prior. your moans reverberated throughout her ears, providing a perfect base for the music as she played all night long.
546 notes · View notes
utterlyotterlyx · 3 months
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Another Love
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Azriel x Fem!Reader
Based on this ask
Summary - Azriel knows you'd never leave his side, no matter what, but when his new situationship with Elain takes over his every living moment and he takes advantage of your feelings, you make the only decision you can to save yourself only for him to hurt you in a way you never thought he could.
Warnings - ANGST, mega fluff, swearing, neglect, abuse of feelings, mentions of death, slight grovelling (I’m more of an epic admissions girlie you all know this), lots of sadness.
Word Count - 4.9k oops
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The clock ticked away, idly counting the seconds by, seconds that turned to minutes, and minutes that turned to hours, hours that Azriel had seemingly forgotten about the promise he had made to take you to the theatre.
The cobalt blue bow in your hair, that you had chosen to perfectly match him, swayed sadly as you moved about your room with a heavy heart, hanging up the dress you had bought especially for the occasion and changing into something more comfortable to wallow in self-pity.
It had become normal, his lateness, his nightly visits became later and shorter until they had stopped all together, well, that is until he needed something from you, and you would give him whatever he asked for, no matter how much it hurt you.
You had been a part of the Inner Circle for over 500 years, you were one of the originals, growing up in the camps with Rhys, Cassian and Azriel, Rhys' mother protected you fiercely, and you were very close to Selene, your chosen sister. You were the one they turned to for everything, you were wise and brutal, an incredible warrior and tactician, but also soft and kind; you were the blue break in a sky of storm clouds, you were the spring breeze that cut through the edge of winter, you were everything.
A thing Azriel knew all too well.
It didn't surprise you when Azriel had become fond of Elain, like it didn't surprise you when he had pined after Mor for all those years, completely looking over you in the process. Elain was a soft and fragile thing, she was quiet and graceful, and Azriel was completely besotted by her. A fact that made your heart curse your stupidity, cursing the hope you had willed into it that maybe he would finally see you.
It was no secret that you and Azriel were the closest out of all of the members of your growing family, you had shared 500 years of respect and adoration for one another.
Azriel was by your side when Selene had so brutally lost her life, he had held your hand through the depression and brought you back to life. Azriel knew every single thing that you loved and hated, he knew what every facial expression meant, he knew every tick of your body language which silently conveyed how you were feeling. Azriel knew you better than anyone, even better than he knew himself. The map of you laid etched bare on the back of his hand, a map he used to scour daily, but now barely even glanced at.
It wasn't so one sided.
You knew Azriel better than anything, and you knew a lot. 500 years of life pointed to a rich knowledge. You were the one who cleaned him up after a mission, you're the one who mended his broken bones and washed his turmoil away. You were the one who helped him overcome his insecurities with his hands. You were the one his shadows shot to at family dinners. You were the one who sang him to sleep when his demons had become to much. There was nothing you wouldn't do for Azriel, even if it meant standing on the side-lines until he wanted you.
Moonlight streaked along the floor of your bedroom, cascading across the pale blue of your comforter and drifting along the edges of your antique furniture. The dress you had wanted to wear to the theatre hung off the frame of your mirror, rippling softly in the gentle breeze that entered through the slightly ajar window.
It was silly to feel upset, you knew Azriel didn't owe you any of his time, but you had really thought he would pull through, especially after you had told him how much you missed spending time with him.
Interrupting your damaging thoughts, your door opened to reveal Azriel, who looked annoyed and not at all in knowing of his lateness or the promise that now lay in tatters in your chest. From the look on his face, you knew instantly that Elain was the one who plagued his mind, she was the cause of it every time he had come to see you recently.
Huffing, Azriel trudged to your cream living area, propping his feet up on the antique table you had asked him to be careful with far too many times and sinking into the cushions. He hadn't spared you a glance as he entered, he didn't note his colour in the form of a bow in your perfectly styled hair, he didn't see the sadness in your eyes laced with that naïve hope that he may have turned up to apologise for being late. He didn't see you.
"What happened this time?" You inquired, wrapping yourself tighter into your robe and sliding into the seat beside him, tucking your legs underneath you and propping your head in your palm as you stared at him.
Azriel was beautiful, scars and demons and all, the height of his cheekbones, those hazel oceans of a thousand emotions, the golden skin and arched brows, the curve of his muscles under his second skin, everything about him was intoxicating.
"Lucien," Azriel through his head back and closed his eyes, breathing deeply through his nose, "I was so close to kissing her, so close, Y/N. And then Lucien walked in, he ruined it."
The revelation had stung, he'd never admitted to you to being close to kissing Elain before, it was always a myriad of stolen glances and ghosting touches, of hushed words laced with a million differing meanings. But never a kiss.
Azriel paid no mind to the hurt that radiated from you, he knew it was there, he always knew it was there but he couldn't focus on it.
Only an idiot could be blind to the clear feelings you had toward Azriel, the way you looked at him was not the way a friend looked at another friend, no matter how close they were. Azriel knew that he could never truly push you away, no matter how much you were hurting you'd never leave, he knew that, he knew you'd always be there for him to fall into.
It was so awfully wrong, but he lapped in serenity you gave him, in that unwavering loyalty, and he had no intention to stop drinking from your fountain of love.
"Lucien is her mate, Az. He's bound to not like whatever it is that's going on between you," your voice was gentle and full of understanding, your hand rested on his shoulder and he felt any anger disappear almost immediately. That's what your touch alone could do to him, bring him immeasurable peace.
"I know," he sighed, opening his eyes and turning his head to the side to look at you, a small smile tugged at his lips when he noticed how pretty you looked, with your hair parted just how he liked it, and with a bow tied neatly at the back, "I still think that the cauldron was wrong," your face faltered when he immediately continued on his weekly rant, "It gets it wrong sometimes, we know that. It's wrong, it has to be."
All you wanted was for Azriel to be happy, he deserved it more than anyone you knew. Rhys had found Feyre, who you adored tremendously. Cassian had found Nesta, who had become a very good friend of yours. So, you couldn't blame Azriel for believing that Elain was fated to be his, three brothers for three sisters. Even you had to admit that it made sense, The Mother moved in mysterious ways.
You plastered a smile on your face, you vision catching the satin of your new dress moving softly against the breeze, "Maybe it is," Azriel hummed at your words before continuing on, listing everything he adored about Elain.
"I wish sometimes that she was you, you know? That her and I could be like this, with no one watching over us, to be able to spend time alone and do whatever we wanted to do and talk about anything," it was like he didn't realise what he exactly he was wishing for.
Azriel wanted you to be Elain, so that he could have the life he dreamed of. Elain. Not you. Elain.
You weren't good enough for him.
"I hope you get to that point one day, Az," your voice was strained from holding in your strangled sobs, "I'm tired, can we talk about this more tomorrow?"
"Sure," Azriel smiled at you, rising from his seat and heading to the door, standing in the doorway and looking back at your form still glued to your spot, "I like your bow, Y/N. Blue suits you, always has," and then he closed the door behind him, you waited a few moments before letting your sobs flow through your lips and ripping that damned bow from your hair.
Azriel would never see you the way you begged to be seen, and you couldn't sit around and be the one he fell back to when life wasn't going his way.
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More days had passed, more days of Azriel complaining to you, more days of Azriel wishing that Elain and you had switched paths so that he could finally get what he was owed.
Azriel didn't care for your tear stained skin, he didn't care for your weary eyes whenever you spoke of Elain to you.
It was awful that he knew exactly what he was doing, he was abusing your relationship with him, he knew you'd never walk away from him, he knew you'd never be able to put your foot down and tell him to cut it out.
The idea of a mate had him completely obsessed, obsessed to the point that he became blind to what was right in front of him, what had always been in front of him. That blind faith in your loyalty crumbled in his fingers once Rhys had told him that you had decided to purchase your own home in the city, a home away from them all.
"What?" Azriel had asked from his place at the dinner table, bewildered by the news given to them once he had asked where you were.
Nesta knew the exact reason why you had decided you separate yourself from them, you couldn't handle the rejection anymore, and you couldn't begin to heal from the decades worth of heartbreak under the same roof as Azriel and Elain. Nesta knew you held no ill feeling toward her youngest sister, you were too kind for that, you knew it wasn't her fault that Azriel came to you each time something went wrong in their situationship, but that didn't make it hurt any less.
"She left, Az," Mor had cried when Rhys had pulled her to one side that afternoon to tell her that you had decided to move into the home that Rhys had bought you after you had made it clear that you needed your own space, and Rhys had spent an hour trying to convince his cousin that your decision was not impacted by anything any of them did.
"Why didn't you tell me?" Azriel asked his brother who frowned, Feyre grabbed Rhys' hand and squeezed it in hers, "She can't just leave, Rhys."
"She has every right to after everything she's done for all of us, she deserves some peace," Rhys spoke calmly, snapping his fingers and allowing the sentient home to rid the plates and serving dishes from the table.
Azriel was speechless, he felt a frantic pull in his body, one that was poisoned with desperation at the thought of you being anywhere else than under the roof of the River House, the home you had spent a century redecorating and perfecting, paying special attention to each room to make it feel as homely as possible.
He didn't believe it as his chair groaned against the floor and he took off up the stairs toward your room, pushing his way through the doors to find it completely empty. No pictures hanging on the walls, no lines of hooks containing an array of ribbons in different hues, no dresses draped over your mirror, no antique furniture. It was all gone, and the scent of you that was usually so strong that it drowned him was a whisper in the atmosphere.
You had left.
Anger bubbled within him, how could you leave without saying anything? How could you move out of your shared home without a single word? How could you leave him after 500 years at his side?
Azriel flung open the doors to your balcony, a balcony plush with fresh flowers and greenery, he flexed his wings and hurtled himself into the starlit sky, allowing his shadows to peel from his body and search every inch of Velaris until they returned to him reeking of your scent and pulled him down to a small townhouse along the bank of the Sidra.
It was a charming home, pale brickwork, large bay windows, golden light emitting from them, and a large garden full of rich wildlife and botanicals. Your scent flowed from the closed oak door, lavender and honey with a hint of firewood and he found himself following that smell up the winding path until he was knocking on your door.
Golden light flowed from the home as you opened the door. You were dressed in denim overalls that were spatted with cream paint, you hair was loosely bound on the top of your head, and your face was full of uneasy surprise as you looked at him, "Az, what are you doing here?"
Azriel pushed past you and stood in the centre of your hallway, listening to your deep exhale as you closed the door. The space was pretty, it was very you, the walls were half painted cream from their original sage colour that you were obviously painting over, the coving was white and saturated with intricate little sketches of leaves, the carpet was a rich brown and had clearly been laid that day from how interrupted it looked, the only pattern on it being the imprints of your bare feet. Azriel didn't stop his shadows as they extended from him and scoured each part of your new home, nodding with approval and curling around your fingers in understanding adoration.
White sheets were draped over your perfectly placed furniture, to protect it from the paint no doubt, and the same tarp lay at the foot of the walls to protect the carpet. Music drifted softly about the room, and boxes upon boxes of books lay open, with some of them idly placed on shelves to get them out of the way to be sorted properly at a later date.
"It's true? You've really left," he noted the intricately presented kitchen, white cabinets and exposed wooden beams, just like you always wanted.
You rounded him, walking into your new living space, bending down to pick up one of your plant pots before placing it on the window ledge, your back faced him but he could see the pain in your features through the reflection in the window, "Yes, I live here now."
"No. No. You're coming home with me, this is ridiculous," his heart was beating a mile a minute, he couldn't think straight, all that was consuming him was the reality that his fear had come to fruition, that the one person he believed would never leave him had actually walked away.
"I'm not coming back, Azriel," you told him softly, and he saw your shoulders rise and fall with each deep inhale of breath you forced your lungs to take.
Then you turned to him, in the middle of the home that you were trying to make yours, a home away from him, "I thought you'd never leave me. You can't leave me. You're my best friend, I need you."
"No, you don't. You need someone to fall back onto when life isn't going your way, that's all I am to you now," you felt your heart breaking, you felt it shattering in your chest, "I can't be the one you turn to when something becomes between you and Elain. I can't be the one you wish was her. I can't do it anymore, Az. You've taken advantage of me for too long. You promise me the world and show up empty handed. You don't realise I even exist until you need someone to complain to and I just can't do it anymore."
Azriel knew every word you were saying was the truth, he knew he had been using you, but he never expected you to actually walk away from him, you were supposed to love him too much to leave.
Your heart was in the palm of his hands and he knew it, he knew you'd spent hundreds of years falling deeper in love with him each passing day whilst he pined for someone else. The fact of your departure made a bitter monster appear in his mind, he allowed it to tug on the venom in his heart, he allowed it to control him, "Aren't you supposed to be in love with me?"
Azriel watched your eyes widen and a breathless gasp fall from your lips, "You know?"
The Shadowsinger scoffed, "Of course I know. Only a fool wouldn't be able to see it," he saw your face contort into painful sorrow but did nothing to stop himself from saying, "I've known for years. I've known that you'd never leave, you've always been the one that I come to for anything I need and you never complain or tell me to leave. You made it easy to take advantage of you."
A tear slid down your cheek but Azriel made no move to wipe it away, "I want you to leave."
"I'm not leaving without you."
Fire roared in your eyes, "You have no right to command me after what you've knowingly done. I honestly thought that you didn't know, that it was innocent and that you just needed my advice. Now I know that you've willingly abused my kindness, Azriel, you can rot in hell," the tears didn't stop flowing from your eyes, your voice was strained and sore, your chest was so tight that you thought it may stop beating all together, "Get. Out!"
Azriel had left you then, he had left your door wide open and soared into the skies, leaving you in the home that was now tainted by his deceit.
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It had been months since Azriel had seen you, Nesta and Feyre had practically forbid him from going anywhere near your home, that being from the land or sky. But that didn't stop him from allowing his shadows to slither under your front door or linger in the streets, he was desperate to know how you were.
Azriel hated himself for what he had said to you, he hated himself for taking advantage of you. In some way he tried to justify it, you were too good for him, he didn't want to ruin you, but it was clear that he already had.
Your absence had left a void that no one could fill, not even Elain despite her efforts, even the thought of her made his stomach drop and sickness swirl to the point where he couldn't bring himself to be around her. All Elain did was remind him of how he failed you.
Azriel had tried writing to you since you wouldn't see him, he gave the letters to Feyre and Nesta, the latter of which still saw your daily, and grew colder toward him with each passing moment. Even Cassian did nothing to hide his disappointment in him, and Rhys had some very telling words to express once Feyre had told him the truth of what had happened in your home that night.
Nothing was working, things with Elain were strained and difficult, the problems between them so raw and everyone's opinions so disapproving that it created a distance between them that was unmanageable.
Then it dawned on him that nothing was working with Elain because it wasn't meant to. The person who was meant to be his had been under his nose for 500 years, and now wanted nothing to do with him.
Cassian had pulled Azriel from his thoughts by stepping through the threshold of his room, "Are you coming to training?"
"Tell me how to fix it," Azriel lifted his head from his hands and turned his head toward Cassian who sighed in reply, moving to the bed to sit beside Azriel, "I need to know how to fix it."
"Only you can figure that out, Az," Cassian spoke to him, throwing his arm over Azriel's shoulder before continuing, "Y/N loves you Az, she has for 500 years. A few months apart won't change that. You're really fucking stupid for this though, she's the only one of us who knew the exact right thing to do and say every time. Y/N deserves more than the basic requirements of respect, she deserves the world in the palm of her hand and a person who loves her more than he loves himself. Don't bother her unless you can do that."
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It was the anniversary of Selene's death, and the day hadn't gotten any easier for you to deal with.
Rhys and you had made a habit of doing something together each year, though, Azriel was the one to accompany you when Rhys had gone Under the Mountain. The location was sacred to you, you and Rhys would bundle yourselves up in blankets and watch the sun set over the Sidra, you'd rehash old memories and stories, ones that you both knew the script to by heart, but that never got old.
Your High Lord had tried to convince you to come home, but didn't push you when you had told him no. Your life had began to feel rather empty without the family antics that consumed your day-to-day life.
"I miss her," you had told him sadly, your head rested on his shoulder as the sun tipped her toes into the water in the distance, the sky grew darker each passing minute.
Rhys hummed, holding you closer to his side, "So do I," he replied with equal sadness, you had all grown up together, you basically were his sister by blood, and when you both had lost her, it only made him clutch to you more, "She'd nail Az's balls to the wall for sure."
A laugh passed through your lips before it died in your throat, you had done your best to not think about Azriel despite him owning your soul, you had done your best to heal from what he had done, but even then, you missed him more than anything, "How is he?"
It was the first time you had asked about him since before you had moved to your new home which was now fully decorated and yours, thanks to Rhys, Feyre and Nesta who made it their priority to help you settle, "He's-" Rhys couldn't lie to you, he was never able to even when you were younger, "-Not great. He misses you, he hates himself for what he said to you that night."
"I'd hate myself too," you had hummed, shifting to stand on the stone ledge where you and Rhys had sat, wanting a better view of the sun as it began to disappear against the horizon.
A familiar cold kiss pecked at your ankles and you looked down to see those shadows you had missed so dearly meandering around where you stood. Cedar entered your lungs and you shivered in painful delight as his warmth curled around your back.
"Y/N," his voice was deep and rough, it was pleading, you looked to your side and found that Rhys had vanished. That damn meddler. "Please look at me."
Not able to say no to that voice, you indulged the Shadowsinger and turned on the balls of your feet to peer upward at him. Azriel had his wings neatly tucked behind his back, his hands dangled at his sides, and his head was hung low. He looked terrible.
"Why are you here?"
Azriel clenched his jaw, he didn't expect you to be happy to see him, but it didn't stop the self hatred from growing in every single cell of his body, "I know how hard today is for you, I just wanted to see if you were alright."
"Well I'm fine, so you can go now," you made a move to walk away, to take the path down the edge of the Sidra to your home which had become your haven away from reality.
Though, you didn't get very far, perhaps two steps before Azriel's fingers curled around your wrist, stopping you in your tracks and pulling you back to him, "Y/N, I don't even know how to apologise in the way that you deserve. I don't know how to say sorry and make you feel like I see and hear you."
"What I did was disgusting, I hate myself for it. I never should have taken advantage of you like that, you've done everything to help me the entire time that I've known you and I ruined everything for someone I don't even want. I've always wanted a mate, you know that, and I got so carried away with wanting it that I completely ignored the only person who's ever truly loved me for me despite all of the horrid things I have done. Elain isn't you, Y/N. No one compares to you. No one makes me feel safe like you do, no one makes me feel alive like you do, and no one can make me hope for death by their void like you do."
"I am yours, Y/N. I always have been. I couldn't be the reason you ever got hurt, I couldn't be the one to risk extinguishing that glorious fire in your soul. You are the only one I cannot bear to lose, the thought of losing you terrifies me, it always has, and instead of protecting you, I took advantage of you and pushed you away because I would rather hurt someone else with everything that I am than hurt you with just a a part of it."
"I'm so stupid for ignoring you, I'm a prick for using you as my security blanket rather than let you in, you know me better than I know myself, you love me more than I could ever imagine, and it terrified me because I couldn't let myself love you. I couldn't let myself taint you."
Azriel lifted his hands, cupping your face in his palms and you could see every inch of despair within him, that conflicted flame dancing within his soul, "I'm not asking you to forgive me, I don't think I will ever be able to forgive myself after what I've done to you. I'm not asking for anything from you. I just need you to know that no matter how severe your storm, I promise I won't leave your side, I'll stay with you through the howling winds that whip my cheeks raw and red. I will stay and hold you when the night leaves you shivering and give you space when when your searing heat pushes you into a fiery rage. I will stay and love you in whatever way you crave, whether that be from next to you or from wherever you cast me to."
"Azriel-" tears flowed freely from his eyes and you knew he meant every word he was saying. Every single word was being plucked from the core of his essence.
"I know that you're scared, and that you don't trust me. I'm scared too. But you're the only one I can face love with because I only want to feel it with you. At the end of the day I want it to be you and me, I want your early mornings and late nights, I want you on your good days and bad. I will never stop wanting you. I will never stop needing you filling my lungs like oxygen and giving me life."
Azriel dropped his forehead onto yours, and you felt your own cheeks dampening from your own tears at his words, "I love you, Y/N. I will always love you, even if you don't want me to, even if you decide to walk away from me I will not stop loving you. I am so thankful for you, and I know I haven't shown that, but if you give me one more chance, I will show you exactly the man you have made me into. I will give you the world you have always dreamed of. My soul is yours until you stop loving me. Please. Please."
"I can't stop loving you, Az. I've tried but I can't and I don't want to," his thumbs wiped your tears away and you found yourself reaching to rest your fingers on the marred flesh around his wrists, "One more chance. Don't fuck it up."
Azriel pressed his lips to your forehead, relishing in your warmth as you bundled into his chest, "You're mine."
"Take me home, Az."
"Yours or mine?"
You grinned against his chest, "How about ours?"
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Authors Note
I really hope this does the ask justice x
Alternate ending incoming 👀👀
934 notes · View notes
circe69 · 1 year
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𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐈𝐧𝐧𝐤𝐞𝐞𝐩𝐞𝐫'𝐬 𝐆𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐬𝐨𝐧 - 𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝟐
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As you arrived in the rainy Manchester, England, you found yourself to be in a slight predicament. With a drenched suitcase in one hand and a wasted train ticket in the other, you wander into a somewhat shady bed and breakfast, with Simon Riley's grandfather as the owner, and Simon Riley himself being your neighbor.
link to part 1
🗝 cw: suggestiveness, making out 🗝 genre: fluff 🗝 fem!reader
⋆。゚☁︎。⋆。 ゚☾ ゚。⋆
The sound of a familiar alarm clock shook you out of your sleep, the repeating tune bouncing off the walls and making you groan as you turn over to slam your hand on the machine.
7 AM. All for a breakfast, you thought, but truthfully, you were curious about the man you'd met last night, Simon, and desperately wanted a chance to see him again, even if it meant losing a few hours of sleep.
You rolled out of bed, sliding on some complimentary slippers that the Inn had offered. Manchester was freezing this time of year, and the hardwood floors didn't help. As you padded your way across the small room, you passed a floor-length mirror. Your mouth downturned at what you saw, your hair going in all different directions and your pants rolled up to your thighs. Well, I guess it means I got good sleep, you shrugged as you passed the mirror into the bathroom, unraveling your curling iron in impatience.
The weather was chilly, and slightly rainy, as always, but you didn't mind it. You'd brought a perfect outfit, anyways, some flare leggings and a dark green sweater. Your makeup had been done in almost record timing, not to mention it was one of those days where it had turned out amazing (out of pure luck, no doubt.) and your hair wasn't as frizzy as you'd expected it to be. It was strangely perfect, and as you slid some UGG boots on, you started to get excited for breakfast.
Just as you were about to turn the door knob to walk out, slinging your purse over your shoulder, there was a loud knock at your door.
"You up?" Simon yelled from the other side. You jumped in response, and opened the door with a hand over your chest. "Goodness, yes I'm up!" He smirked at your slightly out-of-breath sentence, but his face fell when his eyes swept over you.
They didn't miss an inch. They were curious, hungry. Dark brown eyes watched every part of you as if he was studying for a test. "Wow, you look," he stopped to look back up at you, and cleared his throat before saying, "Put together. Way more than yesterday."
You gasped at his attempt of a compliment, dramatically leaving your jaw agape for him to see. "I'm always put together!" You tried to catch up with him as he made his way down the stairs.
After stepping foot on the first floor, Simon led you into a small dining room that was already filled to max capacity with people. You looked around to see the Simon's grandfather, some old ladies knitting scarves, a few younger boys playing with toy trains on the ground. It was a nice sight to ease into the morning with, the sunlight shining through broken blinds and resting on the tops of people's heads.
"Mornin," Simon's deep voice said as it broke through the previous chatter of the people. Everyone stopped what they were doing to all respond in harmony as he led you to an empty seat and pulled it out for you. You politely nodded and as he scooted you in, Simon leaned down to whisper in your ear, "You snored like a bloody freight train, y' know that?" You slapped his arm as he sat in the seat closest to you, "I did not!" Simon winked at you before tucking a napkin into his shirt, "Yeah, I didn't sleep at all, you were too loud."
"Alright, alright, Simon, leave the lady alone," his grandfather said before tapping a rusty spoon on a mug, "I'd like to make a toast, to all of you lovely people who decided to join our breakfast. I reckon my wife is still asleep, but I'll bring her up somethin'." He paused to clear his throat, "As rundown and grimy as this place can be, it means a lot that you all have come to stay. So thank you." He lifted his mug of coffee and you all did the same, cheering quietly and clinking cups with one another. One of the old ladies said from across the table, "I'm starving, hurry up and open those dishes befor' I keel over."
⋆。゚☁︎。⋆。 ゚☾ ゚。⋆
"Ugh, I'm stuffed," you said, slumping back and leaning your head on the back of your chair. Simon turned to look at you, his cheek resting on his palm. He kept sleepy eye contact with you as his foot slid up your ankle, gently rubbing back and forth on your bare skin. You smiled at the action, leaning up in your chair and placed a hand on top of his. He whispered next to your ear, "I wanna show you something." You nodded and followed him out after he stood and pushed both of your chairs in.
Simon led you to a small garden in the backyard of the Inn, with rows and rows of both fruits and flowers. It was quaint, but perfect, and well-kept. Probably the most well-kept thing of the whole establishment. "This is so pretty. Who takes care of it all?" He didn't even look up at your question, but stayed in his kneeled position on the wet grass, fiddling with a strawberry plant in his fingers. "I do," he spoke, "Well, whenever I'm home, it's my hobby. But my grandfather tries his best when I'm not." He stood up, holding a hand out to you, signaling for you to take it. "If you think this is pretty, you just wait."
He walked you past all sorts of different plants, explaining what each of them were and what food it was good on. You admired it, how this strong Lieutenant who kept to himself most of the time was so adamant when it came to gardening. Before you knew it, the two of you stumbled upon a vine-covered gazebo, green laced the white paint underneath it all, and it overlooked a small but gorgeous lake. Your face said everything it needed to; it was the most beautiful thing you'd ever seen. The sun was perfectly reflected on the water, gentle ripples popping on top every so often.
"Wow," was all you could say, and as you turned around to face Simon again, you noticed his eyes weren't focused on the amazing sight beyond the gazebo; they were focused on you, perhaps even the whole time you'd been there. All he needed to see was your face light up at things he'd seen his entire life, things that to him were mundane and boring, but maybe with you they could mean something again.
He took a step closer, slowly stepping to close the distance between the two of you. You watched chest rise and fall with nervous anticipation, feeling your breathing falter as well. His hand hesitantly moved to your waist, the other to your cheek and slowly pulled you in, his lips gently resting on top of yours.
The kiss was slow, nothing was to be expected from either of you. Your hands were still at your side, but steadily reached up to wrap around Simon's neck. You slightly opened your mouth at the same time you tugged a fistful of his hair, making him groan into you and squeeze both of your hips. He walked you backwards until your butt hit the railing of the gazebo, and braced himself on one side of you while his other hand roamed the entire length of you; from brushing his fingertips on your collarbone to gripping the meat on your thigh, nothing was left unconsumed by his large hands. Your tongue swept against his bottom lip before rubbing against his own, soft groans and whines were the only sounds overlapping the soft waves breaking on the rocky shore below you.
Simon broke the kiss to rest his forehead on yours, panting and swallowing deeply before going back in for seconds, his teeth nipping at the skin on your neck and jaw, then kissing the redness he'd marked away. He pulled his head up again, looking at you and your swollen, pink lips, all from his doing.
"Mm," he groaned once more, his eyes closing and burrowing his head into the side of your neck.
"Simon?" You said in a soft tone. He hummed in response, his hands rubbing your lower back, gathering fabric in his fingers to massage your bare skin. "I'll open my door tonight."
He looked up at you, his eyes widened and a small smirk dressing his face. You spoke again, teasing him while letting your hands roam over his chest.
"Are you gonna knock?" You smiled into the question.
Simon planted one more kiss on the tip of your nose, then one on the side of your mouth, "Maybe," he responded.
But Simon knew in his head, it wasn't a maybe, he'd been waiting since he first saw you to get his hands all over you, to whisper sweet nothings into your mouth and behind your ears. He wouldn't just knock at your door, he'd be there on both knees, ready for you to open it.
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overthattwilight · 9 months
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Ace through the mirror AU
-An AU where Ace Trappola doesn't exist, but he exists in the mirror
-He's a mysterious magical being who lives inside the mirrors of NRC
-Not only mirrors, he can exist in any object that has a reflecting surface
-He can also go to anywhere he wants if there is a reflecting surface, but he's sticking on NRC
-According to Ace, inside of the mirror looks weird as the staircase of Heartslabyul dorm. He says it's like moving through various movie sets
-Normally he prefers to appear in smooth mirrors. Other objects that are curved, unclear, or broken, has a distorted view, and distort Ace too. He doesn't really like getting distorted
-Ace has appeared in NRC 7 years ago. No one knows where or how he came
-He likes to tease students by popping up in the mirror and doing mischieve. Or even saying creepy things outside the mirror
-He teases the faculty too. But mostly his target Crowley
-Ace can affect the person with their reflection in the mirror. But Ace can't be affected by the person on the other hand. He is only in the mirror after all
-He's been quite infamous in NRC, and the upperclassmen would say 'Yeah, if you see a kid with brown spikey hair and red eyes, he's gonna pull a prank on you"
-Of course the 2nd/3rd years know Ace too. Ace had some interest about them, and followed them more than other students
-Currently his target is Deuce, Grim, and Yuu/MC. He has appeared to them since the entrance ceremony
-Especially he likes to tease on Deuce, he would follow everywhere he go through the mirror, constantly talking to him. He would usually say "Watcha gonna do today? Watcha gonna doooooo, tell meeeeee"
-Deuce is annoyed how the infamous Ace chose to follow him, for no reason. He doesn't know why Ace is so obssessed to him. He even decided to pop up on winter vacation through Deuce's pocket mirror
-There are some times Ace doesn't tease Deuce. During VDC practice, Ace became the mirror tutor on Deuce's dancing. He also accepted Deuce's request to check on Yuu/MC during winter vacation
-Ace acts quite the same to Grim, always teasing him. He would knock over Grim's tuna can in the mirror, which made Grim no longer eat in front of a mirror
-Sometimes Grim would blow fire on the mirror Ace is in, which eventually leads to getting scolded by Crowley. By the way, Ace is scolded too
-To Yuu/MC, Ace doesn't make pranks that much. Sure he likes to tease them, but he wouldn't make such pranks using the refelction of the mirror
-Usually they would talk in the mirror of Yuu/MC's room. Every morning Ace calls Yuu/MC through the mirror, and every night they have a chat before going to sleep
-He has no idea about the Yuu/MC dreams coming from the mirror. Ace saw nothing when Yuu/MC had the weird dreams
-He also hasn't seen Mickey. He tried staying in front of the mirror, but he saw nothing
-Deuce and Yuu/MC carry a pocket mirror with them so Ace can talk to them without having to search for a near mirror
-During winter vacation, Ace has left with Deuce to prank on him, but returned to NRC after Deuce received an S.O.S. message from Yuu/MC. He spied through the Scarabia students' accessories to see what's going on
-Yuu/MC would break the mirror then scatter the pieces, in order for Ace to have a wider sight when there isn't a mirror that is large enoigh arround. It is inconvenient, but at least it's helpful in urgent situations
Under this is Ace's backstory. It's quite dark
-Something terrible happened in the future(the prologue battle), and Ace was the only one left
-He wanted his normal back, he wanted his school back, he wanted his friends back, he wanted everything back
-By some miracle, his wish came true. He got the magic to turn things back. To rewind the clock
-However, the cost of the wish was cruel. Ace Trappola is no longer an existing person in the real world. And he is trapped inside the reflection of the world
-For the first days, he has been grieving of his fate, trapped inside a fake world reflecting the real world
-He did meet someone to cheer him up. It was his brother
-Of course Ace's brother no longer remembers Ace, but they got to be close friends. This helped Ace to relieve his grief
-He got to tease the students because the long time after his brother's graduation made him bored. He felt empty and teasing was his way to erase it
-He could have followed his brother and leave NRC, but he wanted to see his friends, and decided to wait for them
-Crowley realizes Ace might have used a powerful magic with a dreadly cost. He also knows there is no way to bring him back. Ace doesn't care, he gave up going back anyway.
-Ace just wish that the dark future he has seen in front of his eyes won't happen now. He don't want it to come. Then what would be the meaning of the price he made?
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rogueshadow1124 · 1 month
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RESTLESS NIGHTS
[BATFAMILY IMAGINE SERIES]
Dick grayson x Vigilante!Reader
Summary: Ever since the reader had a run in with the scarecrow one evening, she couldnt let go of the image she got under the influence of the fear gas- her worst fear - losing her beloved.
Word count: 955
Warnings: mentions of blood/slight death.
The rain spattered against the window pane, creating a low and soft thumping sound that was almost calming. Y/N lay in bed, eyes barely open but struggling to close while her boyfriend was asleep peacefully beside her- how she envied him in this moment. She wanted to sleep, even more so needed to sleep, she was tired but restless at the same time, she didnt want to fall into the same nightmare she did everytime she closed her eyes because everything seemed too real. It was like a warning really.
A sigh escaped her throat, emitting into the silence of the room. Her head turned to the right, catching a glimpse of the digital clock beside her that lit up in an voluminous red colour. 1:30am was what shone on the small screen, she had been laying in the same position for hours. She should be thankful Dick was next to her and asleep because neither of them got to spend this kind of moment together or even remotely fall into a slumber with their daily rounds of the night patrols that were set for them.
Y/N placed her hands on eiether side of her thighs and pushed up so she was now sat against the headboard. Her Y/E/C orbs trailed around the messy room, switching between every object in her eyeline. Her mind went elsewhere, flicking back to the time where everything was supposedly easier, not normal but easier.
Then her thoughts drifted to something that wasnt so nice. The nightmares that haunted her daily and nightly. It had all started when she was on night watch with Dick one night, they ran into Scarecrow and she was put under his fear gas. Everything seemed too real in that moment, the blood that stained her hands, Dicks blood to be exact. She watched him die and she couldnt do anything about it, all she did was hold his deceased body in her arms as she sobbed and begged for him to come back.
Though it was only an image that was engraved into her mind by some mere chemicals mixed together, she couldnt shake off the thought of something like that actually happening because it was more than possible. When she finally came back to reality that night she didnt speak a word to Dick who was trying to console her broken aura, she ignored him and ran straight to the bathroom locking herself inside.
Her eyes deceived her as she continued to see the blood that covered her body in the mirror, her mind was playing games with her but at the time she had no clue. She was inconsolable. She spent what felt like hours inside the shower, scrubbing harshly at her sensitive skin making it peel and burn- that was until Dick grew worried and came to her rescue before she caused any harm to herself.
"Babe..." A hoarse voice spoke from her right, bringing her back to reality. Her head tilted down to see her boyfriend hugging her waist, his head burried in her stomach as he looked up at her with his deep blue hues.
"Hey bub." Y/N whispered tiredly, letting out a small yawn as she brought her hands up to rub at her eyes.
"Why are you still awake?" His raven locks stuck in every direction making the girl chuckle slightly and smooth it out as he started to sit up beside her against the headboard.
"Couldnt sleep." She leant over, head falling into Dicks chest. He raised a hand and ran it through her hair, humming while he yawned in response to her statement. His fingers stroked lighty on her scalp in a calm manner, running through the length of her unruly Y/H/C hair.
"Y'look tired baby." Dicks half lidded eyes peered down, taking in her sleepy for though he tell she was forcing herself to stay awake and it wasnt the first time she did, he remembers how she had done this on many occasions after the incident when everything became to much for her to handle. "Why dont you try sleep, m'here."
"I-I cant Dick, I close my eyes and all I see is the same scene infront of me only this time I cant interact I have to watch it happen over and over again." Her voice cracked slightly, head pushing further into the warmth of his chest. Her hands came to rest where his heart would be, running over he clothed skin.
"I'm not going anywhere Y/N/N-"
"You dont know that Dick. What about when were on patrol and something goes wrong, just like my nightmares? Or maybe I wont be there and you disappear, I dont want to be alone. I-I love you and you can call me selfish but I'd rather die protecting you then allow you to die at the hands of someone when I'm not there." She breathed out heavily, a single tear strolled down the perimeter of her cheek as she continued to run a hand over his chest as if she was making sure he was still there.
"I'm never going to leave you behind baby and I most certainly wont let any harm come to you. Ever." He pulled her quivering form into his bigger one, cradling her like a child as she let out another sob, sniffling. "Try and sleep. S'only a few hours before we need to be up anyway."
Y/N hummed, nodding into his shoulder. She moved so her body was practically ontop of his, her arms tucked into her chest just above his stomach where she curled up as much as she possibly could, seeking comfort.
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beepersteeper · 1 month
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I Will Always Find You -- Astarion x Tav - - The Night is Young | part 4
Astarion and F!Tav live happily together for the remaining years she has, she refuses to be turned into a vampire because her faith says that her soul isn’t finished with its work yet. Tav dies of old age and leaves Astarion to put together the pieces of his broken heart. AN: Lord of Light lore taken and changed to fit the story's means. Not canonically accurate. TLDR story line stuff. This is an AU where Astarion ascends but isn't a power hungry bastard and Tav is able to help him continue healing. Wyll is immortal and the Duke. Karlach in my mind, if given a new engine would be able to live a lot longer than the usual tiefling. Another AN: idk if anyone wants tagged in this WIP but let me know. 
Astarion shuffles the books onto a shelf quickly and straightens them out. “If the offer to visit stays I'm sure I'll be around.” He unwraps his sandwich and enjoys a bite. After a few more hours, the customer stream becomes stagnant. “Why don't you kids take the rest of the day to yourselves. I can close up shop today.” Her dad says, looking from the clock on the wall to his daughter.
Ta’vira smiles wide and kisses him on his cheek thanking him and walking quickly to the curtained room. When she was out of sight her dad walked up to Astarion and put a couple silver into his palm “Buy her something nice" he winked.
Astarion smiles and returns the coins “I will sir." Patting the back of the man's hand.
Her father raises his eyebrows and nods approval and watches Astarion offer his arm to Ta’vira to take after reaching for his pack. “You kids have fun.” He waves “but not too much fun, you hear me Little Star?"
Astarion blushes, his ears burning and laughs holding up both of his hands showing innocence. “Only modest wholesome fun sir."  He chuckles while being practically pulled through the door.
"Well daddy sure seems to like you.” She laughs, slowing her pace to a walk after they are out of view of the bookstore.
"What's not to like?” He says running his fingers of his free hand through his hair. “He did say I was impressive." He jokes earning a soft swat to his arm “I'm nearly 350 years old, I have to admit being called ‘son’ and ‘you kids’ is a bit novel.” He laughs and offers his arm to her to take. She does and he pulls her arm closer to his body. They both laugh and walk through the town stopping by every little shop they pass to see the wares. Not finding anything to buy but appreciating them nonetheless. 
Ta’vira found a silk shawl in the clothing shop that she could not take her eyes or hands off of. She would go to set it down and then wrap it back around her shoulders looking in the mirror turning from side to side. Eventually she frowned and sighed under her breath and folded it neatly to return it to the shelf. Astarion watched from a few steps behind her as she fell in love with the garment. He stepped forward sliding his hand under the soft fabric, stopping it from being placed back where it came from. He takes the shawl in his hand and quietly carries it to the teller while Ta’vira watches with her jaw slack. “No! Don’t! You don't have to do that." She protests. Reaching in vain for the shawl. 
“I'm aware." He says playfully with a half smile on his lips “have to and want to are different things entirely, Ta’vira." He laughs, handing the woman at the counter enough coins. And nods a thank you to her. He turns to Ta’vira and wraps it around her shoulders through her useless protest and threads the button through an opening securing it around her shoulders. “It suits you." He states with a soft smile while smoothing the fabric on her frame. He holds the crook of his arm out again.
She rolls her eyes and takes his offer. “Thank you." She sighs “it is beautiful."
“Like I said. It suits you." He smiles, turning his eyes to meet hers, watching her turn away to hide her smile and blush filling her cheeks and ears.
The duo walk through the town again finding a crowd forming around several sorcerers putting on a light show with their magic. The two weave through the crowd to get a better view. He moves her to stand in front of him making sure she can see, but also making sure that she is safe, and that she wouldn't have to worry about pickpockets or people with bad intentions. Letting her be completely in the moment while he half watched the show and half took stock of their surroundings, old habits that he is mostly glad he had. As the show continued she kept making impressed sounds and he watched her face light up from the lights but also from her pure excitement. As the show winds to an end, he feels her lean her weight into his body watching the grand finale, he instinctively places his hands on her slender waist to help support her. He sighs a smile, feeling that knot in his chest loosen. After scanning the crowd again his eyes fall to her. Admiring the way her hair falls over her shoulders smoothly and effortlessly.
“That's always amazing," She says excitedly. Turning her body to face him “don't you think?”
"Yeah~” he smiles. The street performers have always been enchanting to watch but he has become hyper aware of his hands at that moment. Somehow the touch was way too intimate and comfortable at the same time. “Where to now?" He flashes a crooked smile. 
“Are you getting hungry at all?" Ta’vira asks, still facing him as the crowd dissipates, her hands gently placed on his chest from the other people bumping around and into them she had lost her balance and caught herself there.
“I could eat." He shrugs and looks down the line of food vendors.
“Do you need… " she trails off and mouths blood “or like dinner?"
He chuckles “Dinner.” He puts his arm around her torso, leading her through the crowd to find lines of food vendors “What are you feeling?”
“I don't know, I don't come out here at this time almost ever. Let's just see what looks good.” She shrugs and scans the vendors she can see. Settling on a vendor touting “The best meat pies.” 
Astarion orders two and pays and tips the vendor before being handed two chicken and gravy pies. They find their way to a bench near the water away from the other patrons. They sit quiet enjoying their dinner enough to forgo conversation. “The sign didn't lie” Ta’vira laughs wiping her face with a balled up napkin. She looked go Astarion who was finishing his pie and had crumbs scattered across his face. She giggles before she reaches over and brushes them off “More a messy eater than I assumed.” 
He rolls his eyes, wiping his own face, putting his hand out to gather her trash with his. “That was delicious, I couldn't help myself.” He laughs, “I usually have more tact than that.” He walks a few steps away from her to throw away the garbage, careful to not let her out of his sight. He returns to the bench and leans into the back looking onto the water, watching the lights from passing ships and the moon reflect off the calm water. 
“Vira, by the way." She breaks the silence pulling her knees to her chest covering her legs with her new shawl.
“What?" Astarion asks, confused by her statement.
“You can call me Vira." She smiles into her knees. “You asked what you should call me.”
"I thought your friends called you Vira.” He jokes, nudging his shoulder into hers gently toying with her.
“Are we not friends?” She feigns being hurt, putting her hand playfully to her chest.
“I suppose we are.” He smiles, putting his arms on the back of the wooden bench, returning his gaze to the horizon.
“Can I ask you a few questions? If they're too much you can just say no." She asks as she turns to face him.
He nods, putting his arm around her gently “Why not."
“How old are- were you when you became a vampire?"
"39.” He sighs, forcing his shoulders to relax. Fix your shoulders darling. He heard Tav's reminders. You always carry your stress there.
“Wow, so young." She sighs a small frown on her face “was it willingly?"
“Not quite, but that's a story for another day darling." He doesn't lie, but doesn't want to talk about that right now, the night has been perfect. No need to dirty it with talks of him.
“That's okay.” She shrugs happily taking his response, not trying to force any conversation “How are you able to be out in the sun? I've heard of a city of vampires in the Underdark but never like you.” Her eyes meet his.
“That’s… that is a very long story.” he draws a shallow breath. Steeling himself to answer the question he is least proud of. “But  the short version is I've been given an opportunity that no other has ever been afforded. Had to do some terrible things for a greater good, and ended up with a handsome reward for the effort. I have all of the strengths a vampire has while still being able to enjoy the luxuries of the living.” he states plainly moving his eyes to the horizon again.
“One more and I promise to be done for now. Where have you been for the last 30 years?” she shyly asks, readjusting herself on the bench.
“Now that's a question" he tuts “I've been to so many places. I needed to get away from the Gate to clear my head. Everywhere I looked here was Tav. I couldn't tell you where I was exactly but nowhere felt right so I was constantly moving, looking for something I couldn't find. I guess I was looking for Tav like I promised I would.” He shrugs “But I never felt whole like I did when I returned to the cemetery.” He points toward the direction of the cemetery with his thumb before returning his arm to her shoulders.
“That's kind of sweet." She smiles leaning her head onto his shoulder trying to sap some of his warmth.
He smiles and pushes her away gently “Up for a moment darling." He takes his jacket off and offers it to her, holding it to allow her to put her arms in the sleeves. Vira removes her shawl and slips her arms into the jacket. She smiles and puts the shawl over her legs while thanking him. He pulls gently on her shoulder to return to his. “Do you remember specifics from any of your past lives?" He takes the moment to ask  question of his own.
“Nothing that I can pinpoint as being more or less recent." She shrugs “But like… I have these crazy dreams and bouts of…  deja vu. This one in particular I see myself fighting impossible enemies with faceless friends.” She laughs a hearty laugh “like I swear I've fought a machine made of ancient metal that was crushed by a giant forge hammer. And then my large and incredibly warm friend was beside herself, cackling hysterically when the hammer both killed the Titan and created the weapon in the slot.” She laughs at the nostalgia playing with her hair.
“Faceless friends?" He was shocked by hearing a story that he lived from someone who wasn't there. No one else was besides him, Tav, Wyll and Karlach. They didn't even tell the rest of the party because the shadow lands happened so quickly after and that took all of their attention. “And you crushed a titan… with a forge hammer?"
“It sounds crazy right? Like something Volo would write.” She scoffs “All of my memories are clouded and distorted. I don't see people's faces or anything of the like. Unless they're from my current go at things.”
“Not as crazy as you'd think." He tries to hide his shock. Eyes wide still staring at the dark horizon. 
She shrugs after a moment of looking at him without his returned gaze. “Thanks for a great night." She sighs, returning her head to his shoulder.
“Don't thank me yet” He smiles “the night is still young. Let's go find something else to do.” He stands up and holds his hands out for her to take. 
She smiles wide and puts the shawl in his open hands. He scoffs playfully and tucks the garment under his arm and returns his hands to where they were. This time she takes them with a smile being pulled to stand. She threads her arm through his arm that isn't holding her shawl, holding his upper arm with her free hand.
They weave through the town not stopping anywhere in particular but enjoying the company and adventure around their town. Eventually they just make their way back to the bookstore. “I hope your father doesn't think I kept you out too long.” He smirks, squeezing onto her hand that's holding onto his bicep.
“He doesn't.” Her father speaks from the open window on the second floor. “Just hope you treated her like the lady he is.”
“Wouldn't dream of anything but sir." Astarion laughs covering his mouth with his hand trying not to yell into the night while others might be sleeping. “I even bought her something nice.” He holds the shawl in the air. 
“Don't look down here daddy.” She warns as she pulls herself onto her tiptoes placing a hard kiss on Astarions cheek "Thanks for a great night.” She smiles, her face staying close to his. Hearing her father groan and shut the shutters. 
“Of course darling.” He coos placing his finger under her chin and his thumb on its front holding her face close to his “I had a great time. And I could only hope to be so lucky to have another one day.”
“Why don't you come by tomorrow and see if you're a lucky man.” She smirks, leaning her chin into his grasp. 
He kisses her forehead and hands her her shawl “Until tomorrow then." He smiles, slightly but enough to crease the lines by his eyes “Goodnight Vira."
“Goodnight Astarion." She smiles and walks into the building.
He doesn't leave until he hears the door lock and sees the candle light disappear from the windows.  When he does leave he walks through the cemetery first, resting his bag next to him in front of Tav's headstone. “I hope this is all okay. It feels right and wrong all at the same time." He whispers, reaching into his bag looking for his books to be greeted by a beacon that had a note tied to it in case you wanted to feel close to Tav. With a flourished signature Vira~. “She's not you, but…” he trails off and gestures the beacon toward the headstone and bookstore. “I have to admit some things are uncanny.”  He sighs, smiling at the beacon. “this is the kind of shit you would do my love.” He chuckles, replacing it in the bag, no longer looking for the book. “I just hope I'm not insulting you. I'll come by tomorrow. I love you more.” He kisses the stone and flies back to the palace, becoming more in need of rest than he realized.
When he arrives Wyll is in the office leafing through papers. Astarion makes his presence known by clearing his throat. “I hope I'm not intruding."
“Not at all my friend. How was your day? You've been gone all day."
“Honestly Wyll." Astarion sighs, letting himself down into a velvet chair across the desk from Wyll leaning his forearms on his knees. “It's the best day I've had in decades." A smile peaking at his eyes again.
“Do tell. I've looked forward to seeing you smile like that again.” Wyll says, setting his papers to the side.
Astarion rambles on about his day. The beacons. The cemetery. The visions. The outing. The pie. "You'll have to get one. Seriously the best thing I've eaten in a long time.”
“You had a date?” Wyll prods "I'm happy for you!”
“Not a date.” Astarion protests "Just getting to know her. It can’t be a date, I've barely known her for a full day.”
“Riiight.” Wyll drawls out his response. “Not a date." He chuckles “I think my friend has a crush. But what do I know." He jokingly shrugs, returning to his stack of paperwork.
Astarion scoffs "If I protest you'll just take that as admittance anyway.” Wyll nods smiling at him. “If it was a date, it was a wonderful date.” Astarion says leaning into the back of the chair. “I just feel guilty. Tav was my one. She was everything and more than I could have ever dreamed.”
“Be happy Astarion.” Wyll urges, giving his full attention to his friend. “Tav would want you to be happy. That's all she ever wanted, truly. And if she's right, you have to meet people to find her. I guarantee she would not be sour if you're dating after 30 years of mourning.” Wyll moves his hand and wrist to gesture as time passes.
“You might be right.” Astarion sighs contentedly “Gods I hope you are.” he blinks away the daydream “Enough of that are you working on tonight?" He changes the subject right before they hear a quiet knock on the palace door followed by a louder one. They look at each other before moving quickly to the door, getting in front of the night employees, both with their hands on their weapons as they open the door.
“Hi,” Vira waves “I'm sorry it’s late, I just realized you forgot this." she adds sheepishly with Astarions jacket in her outstretched hand.
“Come in here." Astarion sighs, blinking a long blink while grabbing her hand in his and pulling her carefully into the foyer. “You shouldn't be wandering out this far at this time. There are harmful people out there” He shuts the door behind her “and your father will kill us both if he finds out that you're here right now." He tries to sound sour but can't while stifling a laugh at her reckless behavior.
“He knows I'm here.” She tuts sticking her tongue out laying his jacket in his hand.
“Right, of course he does.” he chides “Well, this is Vira, Wyll.” Astarion introduces her by putting his hand on her shoulder and using the other to bring attention to her. 
“Well met, My friend was just recounting your night. I'll leave you two to it. I'll be in the office for a while longer." He bows his head and excuses himself, patting Astarion on his shoulder reassuringly.
“He doesn't know you're here does he?" Astarion crosses his arms around the jacket already knowing well enough her father would never let her out this far at this hour.
“Fine, not so much, he knows I was going to the cemetery and I realized I had your jacket, and I wasn't going to bring it until I felt that rock in your breast pocket-” she gestures a hand towards the jacket “and decided that you shouldn't be without it." She shrugs explaining her excuse. "Look, I already have her beacon, I don't want her to be sour with me for keeping your special rock too.” She puts her hand on his arm and steps closer to him.
He laughs taking her hand in his "She hasn't asked to see it in a long time. I think one night would have been fine." 
“Maybe I'll have to start asking for her, to keep you honest." she smirks.
"I think she would appreciate that.” He laughs loudly thinking about Tav checking for the silly stone even from beyond the grave. “Now let's get you home. Again. Before your father finds me a lot less impressive.” He guides her by the waist out the door. 
Before they leave the front of the palace she quickly turns to him grabbing his face in both her hands and kisses his lips. Their eyes meet for a moment before he puts his hand on the base of her head and pulls her face to his, kissing her more passionately than she had just done, feeling the butterflies in his chest take flight.
“I have no idea what we're doing." She laughs sheepishly, her ears burning red. “I just know that I wanted to do that all evening.”
“I can’t say I mind." He whispers and licks his lips. They smile at each other and walk hand in hand to the edge of the cemetery. “Now go home Vira, for real this time.” He chuckles, kissing her knuckles before letting her hand go. “Goodnight. I'll make sure you get in safely. And I'll see you tomorrow."
She whispers a goodnight and turns to walk away their fingers slipping from each other's grasp as she does. He turns into a white bat and follows her back to her house, watching her enter again, And the candle light fading through the windows again. He smiles to himself and flies home. He returns to his natural form and enters the office.
“She seems nice. Stubborn. Like she'll keep you on your toes." Wyll chuckles “Coming all the way out here to bring you your jacket? That’s bold.”
“Stubborn." He responds by exemplifying that word he rests in the chair again. “She's something.” He states not realizing a smile creeps on his face. “Maybe I'm reaching. Maybe I've completely lost it. But I would bet that I found her. She doesn't know it. But my Tav is in there somewhere, Wyll.” Wylls face wears the question he wants to ask as Astarion continues “Do you remember the adamantine forge?"
“Of course. Big monster. Bigger hammer. Mama K in stitches after the sword just popped out of its mould from the force. I'll never forget that.” He laughs into the desk
“EXACTLY!” Astarion sits up straight and scoots to the edge of his chair, excited. “She told ME about that today! That's no coincidence, Wyll." He explains the story as Vira did.
“A faceless but warm friend laughing hysterically…wow. There are only 4 souls that know about that…” Wyll thinks quietly for a while “Now what?”
“From what I've read she needs to figure it out, and hopefully will in due time, supposedly memories become more clear as people mature- unfortunately she is an elf so it could still be years before she really remembers anything.” he groans “I don't think I can just tell her.” He shrugs “It seems like I might have more work cut out for me than I thought. But I'm not crazy for thinking that, right? Not just blinded by my own want? “
“Not if she knows about that, I mean, there's no way right?”
“No, that's why Karlach held that sword up like she did, leaving a joke in that painting that only we would understand.” Astarion said before wyll joined in.
“It'll be funny, come on! Just let me hold it." They both mock Karlach calling back to that night. They laugh together for a moment, before quietly sitting in each other's company before Astarion asks again what Wyll is working on.
“I’m just examining the Flaming Fists by-laws. There have been complaints about them overusing their power and I plan on showing them exactly what their breath of abilities are. Want to take a look?" He holds a folder out to Astarion who takes it.
“Are they beating and jailing innocent folks again? Because that seems to be the cycle they always fall into." Astarion groans, remembering being physically thrown into a cell after Tav accidentally nicked a book that was supposedly owned, even though she just wanted to read it and put it back down.
Wyll points a finger toward him “You're right. I'm meeting with the head of the Fist the day after tomorrow, do you want to join me?”
“Sure, might as well get my feet wet again, I'm a little out of practice.” he sighs, honestly not wanting to take his roles back entirely.
“I won't lie to you, I'll be at a bit of a loss when I ultimately return your seats to you completely.” He chuckles, “I've gotten quite comfortable up here.”
“If you want to keep it, it's yours. You're doing far better than I would anyway. I'll just fall in behind you, be the Duke's right hand and all.”
“We'll cross that bridge another time.” Wyll waves his hand "I would hate to take advantage of your current affliction.” Wyll jokes making a love heart shape in the air with his fingers.
Astarion tosses a pencil at him to get him to stop. “I mean it, you ass.”
“As do I” Wyll calmly returns the pencil to Astarion and points at the papers “Now read what's in front of you if you don't mind.” They discuss the packets for the better part of an hour before they both retire to their rooms.
Astarion steps into his and Tav’s room and feels the knot in his chest barely tighten when he looks at the bed. He sighs a smile and changes into his night clothes. He sets himself in the chair to rest again, deciding he’s still unwilling to sleep in bed. He is awoken again by a knock on his door and someone on the other side offered to fetch his morning goblet.
“Two please." He stretches his body, joints cracking from being contorted in strange ways to rest. As he waits for his breakfast he gets dressed in another set of his plain clothes- plain pants with boots and a black button up shirt with a vest and a jacket he folded and put in his bag, careful to put Tav's stone in the pocket. Dabbing on some of his sweet scented oils from years gone by before he retrieved his breakfast and drank them quickly, excited for another day with Vira. He hurried out of the palace with his bag holding his own studies and her beacon. He was still buttoning his vest as he was walking down the sidewalk. 
He walks into the front door of the store moments after it opened. Greeting Vira's father with a firm handshake “Good morning sir.” as he looks over to Vira who is perchinging on the arm of a chair looking over a packing list for a shipment of books to a local church. Wearing a black cotton dress with her new shawl draped over her shoulders. 
“Welcome back Astarion, my Vira told me you both had a great evening." He smiles, eyeing Astarion, causing his ears to burn a little. “She said you were a perfect gentleman.”
“I am capable of more than my roguish looks might convey sir.” He jokes, shaking his hand again. Sneaking another glance at Vira as she stands to pack a crate of books. 
“Go on son, I'm smart enough to know you didn't come here to talk with me.” He smiles and ushers Astarion to go see his daughter. “But I do appreciate a man with some sense between his ears."
Astarion tries to mute his excitement as he walks cooly toward the counter and starts handing her books. “Good morning, darling." He smiles, honeyed words rolling from his tongue and letting his fingers brush against hers “I hope you slept well." 
Vira blushes, “It took me longer than usual to fall asleep.” She blushed “I was studying Tav's beacon for a while” before she whispered to him quietly. “and I couldn't stop thinking about our wonderful evening.” she beams a smile to him.
He smiles wide handing her the last book from the pile “Did you get any more information from the beacon?" He asks, leaving her last comment where it was.
“Nothing more than I did when you were here." She shrugs, pressing the lid on the crate and calling to her father “Daddy, the order is ready!"
“Leave our copy of the packing list on the desk. Why don't you and Little Star take it over, they'll be happy to get it early.” He states looking over the top of his morning paper. 
She nods and slides the heavy crate from the counter with a grunt struggling to balance the load. “Goodness." Astarion grumbles helping her steady the crate in her arms “Would you just let me carry that?"
“I am very capable of carrying this." She readjusts the parcel. “Thank you very much.”
“I am sure you are perfectly capable darling." He laughs taking the crate from her hands without any real fight earning a chuckle and an approving paper waggle from her father “but you are also able to ask for help when you need it.” He tuts holding the crate with ease.
“You tell her Little Star.” Her father jeers.
“Don't encourage him, daddy." She grumbles, opening the door, urging Astarion out of it “We'll be right back." She shuts the door and tells Astarion where they're going. 
The two walk through town, talking about nothing in particular as they arrive at their destination. They deliver the crate and set their course back to the bookstore. They walk slowly enjoying the time they get to share. She wraps her arms around his holding onto him just above his elbow. He almost on instinct raises his forearm across his stomach. She sighs contentedly, squeezing his arm softly three times.
He looks down at her quizzically “What was that?” he says as he hears Tav's voice in his mind just saying I love you even when I don't want to speak. She would squeeze his hand or arm or thigh millions of times through their life together. During dinners, meetings, while walking through their adventure, or even during arguments.
“What was what?” Vira asks, confused.
He laughs to himself “You just squeezed my arm, just making sure you're okay.”
“I'm great.” She sighs “If I'm being honest this has been the best I've felt as far as I can remember.” she smiles to herself still walking in stride with Astarion, looking around their surroundings taking in the day.
“I'm glad.” He says returning three squeezes her hand. “And thanks by the way.” He hums “for the beacon, I didn't anticipate a trade when I gave you Tav's."
“I know” she plainly shrugs “but seeing the way your face lit up when you used it, I knew it wasn't meant to be mine.”
“You're too good to me." He tuts tugging in her arm to help her avoid a pothole “you barely know me.”
“But I feel like I do." She says seamlessly avoiding the divot. “And I think you deserve goodness. Even if you might not think the same thing." 
He rolls his eyes hearing Tav's voice saying the same thing every single time he speaks negatively about himself. Smiling at hearing the words out loud again. They walk the rest of the way to the bookstore continuing to talk about trivial topics. Astarion opens the door for Vira to walk though being greeted by her father. The three elves spend the day organizing and cataloging books for more orders and onto shelves. Vira and Astarion find any excuse to work on a task together throughout the day.
“Well I guess it is more efficient this way." Her father chuckled watching the two stacking books orderly in several crates “You know you're not on the payroll here, right son?"
“I know sir" Astarion flashes that award winning smile and lets his eyes drift to Vira “I just like having an excuse to keep myself in such beautiful company.”
“Is that right?" He laughs, raising an eyebrow “You kids getting hungry? Vira will you go and grab lunch from that meat pie vendor. I need Little Star’s help moving some heavy shipment from this morning.”
“Be nice daddy.” She scolds "he's a good man.” 
"I am nice dear. We'll both be here when you get back. Now run along, the sooner you leave the sooner you get to come back to see your new friend.”She begrudgingly sighs and leaves, giving Astarion a sorry smile to apologize. When the door latches her father walks over and flips the open sign to closed, making Astarions stomach flip with it.
Taglist:
@zoeloveslotr @silverfangmarks @prudent-nerd
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joleneghoul · 3 months
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Everyone wants the jacket lore do not be silent
Okay obviously this is going to be me rambling on about my own headcanons but also the tiny canon reasons I have these headcanons.
Okay first I'll start off by saying the jacket I personally Always draw Rip in and the one from my design used to belong to Booster during Boosters (short lived) College days.
That being said, It's a jacket that's very...dated and old for the future, so I believe it was from a thrift shop before Booster owned it (so while being in a similar style to futuristic bomber jackets, it lacks that neon bright color scheme that seems to of been popular for Boosters generation.)
Here is just an example of Rip side-by-side to Michelle (who's outfit is based on her introduction in Issue 15 of BG vol 1- post Booster leaving, and post her mothers death). again, that 80s-escque big shouldered, large collar/lapel was in, but the colors are muted and off. I like to think about future fashion trends a lot, how staying on trend in the present is something Booster clearly cares about, how that probably wasn't as much of a possibility in his own past (the future).
Rip's design is based on a theoretical future fashion while having more earthy muted elements- augh its a whole meta thing I got going on in my head. Earth tones instead of neon primary colors, Silver/chrome accents instead of Gold, etc etc.
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But anyway when it comes to canon I find it fun that in this arc of Vol 1 we get to see multiple reactions to Jack and Rip's clothing. They get the obvious "those are dated clothes" comments but nothing to say they are insanely out of place. They even use the excuse that they are just college students working on a play-their outfits are similar to something a student department would scrounge up at a minimal cost but still seeming off and inaccurate to the time frame they're trying to portray.
(now that's also because all historical documents of the past during this time were destroyed but- ykno. I like to imagine there's multiple reasons why people weren't like "NEVER SEEN CLOTHES LIKE THAT BEFORE!".)
It's clear to me that even in this arc, Rip's jacket is important enough to him that he makes Jack sell HIS jacket instead of his own. Now, Rip's a selfish guy and all especially at this time in his characters history, but with the meta context that Booster is Rip's father, and this arc being about Booster wanted for treason- the idea of Rip running around in his fathers old star quarterbacks jacket (while modded with red accents) just is fun to me. Not to mention even within this arc Rip is weirdly avoidant of anyone seeing him and looks EXTREMELY like a slightly younger Booster despite men in this series explicitly looking very different from each other.
aka: I think it would just add to the weird cycles that surround Rip's non-linear life.
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Now I am someone who is Really into design elements that tell story, aka why I like drawing Rip's hands covered in scars because he wears improper gloves as someone who works with his hands, and why i like adding patches and scuffs to the leather jacket when I make it more detailed. It's old, It's older than Rip, It is something he cares a lot about because it's a piece of home and something that was his dads that he gets to have with him most of the time. I don't think Rip would ever call himself sentimental- i think these are things he holds onto nonetheless (similar to him literally clinging to the old family heirloom clock despite it being broken throughout time masters.) He is a character who cares so intensely but wont say it out loud, you have to show these things in the tiny details or what he surrounds himself with.
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This becomes important when A lot of the paranoia he faces in time masters revolves around the triggers he experienced WHILE seeing the place his dad grew up in, what created it, how these family cycles started.
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I think in a way to mirror his growth through the end of this, realizing there's things he can't change but he can change himself and how he treats others- look towards bettering his own future than fearing the lack of control he has in the (non-linear) past- I like to add the sunflower to the back of the jacket post this arc. this Arc has a lot of differences in my head with the addition of so much new lore/canon since the 90s and my own headcanons (time gardens- hence flower/bug/plant imagery so often in my shit), but still the theme remains the same really.
While Rip is a character i many times in my art associate with Daffodils ( a flower representing rebirth and such) and sunflowers are flower i associate with the likes of Wave & Booster I do think the meaning behind them of new opportunities through others and happiness is something that would both honor the history of the jacket while making it his own.
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LASTLY 4th person who "owns" the jacket, and this is shown in my art a few times, is Jeff (occasionally) because I think that's the only person Rip would trust with it when he outgrows the jacket (bc I do think as Rip gets older he fills out more and its moreso a piece for someone a bit lankier). It smells old and reminds them of when they were younger. ugh. I just find the idea of sharing clothing with significant others/partners really fun ok? sap for it.
anyways sorry if this makes no sense its just one of those things i think about a lot and only i do bc its something i made up lol!!
AKA 1 stupid jacket means a lot to a few weird time travelers.
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