#let him embrace his stupid. its stress relief.

[lessnowon]

i mean. sure. bruce could be an absurdly competent actor who is capable of going about his everyday life flawlessly portraying an entirely fictional personality without ever breaking character...

but personally, i like to think that he is actually just extremely good at compartmentalizing and exaggerating different facets of his real personality, and that both "brucie" and "batman" are rooted in truth to some degree

#batman #dc comics #dc batman #bruce wayne #brucie wayne #is this a hot take?? #i have no idea #but it seems to me that a lot of people think of 'brucie' as a mask that he wears #and i just want to give bruce himbo rights #let him embrace his stupid. its stress relief.

[chans-room]

Stress Relief

Pairing: Frat boy! Namjoon x thick college! Reader (poly ot7 x reader alluded to)

Genre: established relationship, hurt/comfort, fluff, smut

Rating: 18+ only

Warnings: Hurt feelings bc of a professor, thick reader insecurities, reader talks poorly about herself briefly, imposter syndrome feelings, day drinking to cope with emotions, explicit sexual content, Daddy Dom!Namjoon, sub!Reader, over use of the word Daddy, fingering, marking, cockwarming, dumbification if you squint, finger sucking?, talks of punishment, allusions of a d/s relationship

Word count: 1.9k

Thank you @eureka-its-zico for helping me edit this and alway reading the random stuff that comes out of my brain.

————————

She sighed, dropping her bag on the floor, making a bee-line for the kitchen. She figured no one would be home, and by the time someone did come home, she would be wasted. She picked a half-empty bottle of tequila off the counter, unscrewing the cap and taking a drink.

“What’s got you so worked up, baby?” Namjoon’s deep voice stopped her in her tracks. Her eyes slid over to his form, sprawled out on the couch lazily watching her. “Is my girl skipping class to drink all by herself?”

She pouted, walking over to him before plopping herself in his lap, not bothering to discard the tequila bottle as she slotted her knees over his hips. She normally wasn’t so bold as to put all her weight onto any of them, still conscious of her size despite their many, and repeated, protests. His giant hands reached out to take hold of her, kneading into her plush thighs. “No, I didn’t have class today because we had individual evaluations,” she mumbled, taking another shot as the tears welled in her eyes.

Namjoon frowned at her, wiping away a stray tear that she didn’t realize had escaped, “Oh baby girl,” he sighed, taking the bottle out of her hand before crushing her into his chest. She couldn’t hold it in anymore; she let the tears fall from her eyes as he rubbed her back gently, whispering softly in her ear as he held her.

“I just feel so stupid, Joonie,” she whimpered, burying her face in his shirt, her arms wrapped around him.

“Baby you’re not stupid,” he cooed, kissing the side of her head, “I don’t date stupid girls. And you’re my only girl,” he teased gently, making her pout at him.

“You didn’t hear what he said,” she mumbled sadly into his shoulder.

“What did he say to you baby,” Namjoon asked gently, his hand threading into her hair as he held the back of her head. She closed her eyes, releasing the tension in her shoulders, already feeling more calm. Namjoon had that effect on her, he always had. He seemed to know when she needed to be held, and his embrace was a solace for her. “Come on now baby, I know you’re a lightweight but you’re not about to pretend two sips of tequila can take you out.”

“It’s not the tequila, Joonie,” she sighed, nuzzling into his neck, “You know my brain goes a little fuzzy when you hold me like this. It makes me feel safe.”

He laughed, his lips dropping to the top of her head before pulling her tighter to his chest, “That’s because you’re my love, and you’ll always be safe with me,” he said seriously, “Now tell me what your professor said to you, baby.”

“He told me that I should never have been let into the program because I’m not good enough and implied that I stole the spot from someone more deserving,” she recounted sadly. She had felt extra confident walking to class that morning with Jungkook by her side — she had been so sure her professor would have some positive feedback for her final project that she'd even worn the cute, but short, dress Jin had put in her closet the week before. But the meeting had undercut any confidence she’d been building.

Namjoon’s body went rigid under hers, the shame from her professor’s words cutting through her like a knife as she sunk back into herself. Maybe her professor was right and Namjoon just didn’t know how to tell her he agreed. What if everyone agreed but hadn’t said anything to her to spare her feelings? Shame rose in her chest like bile and she tried to push herself off of Namjoon’s lap, but she was caught by his strong arms easily.

“Baby girl, tell me what’s happening in your head right now,” he demanded, his voice dropping an octave in the way he only did when he was slipping into a dominant headspace, or when he was angry.

“Do you think he’s right?” She whispered, earning a sharp inhale from Namjoon.

“I can’t understand why anyone would say something so disgustingly false to you,” he spat out through ground teeth, tugging the hair at the back of her head firmly to tilt her head backwards. The rage burning in his eyes made her stomach flip, a small gasp flying out of her mouth at his sudden aggression. “No one should talk to you like that. You’re fucking amazing, and smart, and talented, and the fact that he suggested that you were anything less, is not only ridiculous, but stupid.”

“I really appreciate you saying that, but he’s my professor and his opinion of me is really important, Joonie—“ she sighed, but was cut off by another firm tug on her hair and the soft moan that followed.

“Do you think that I would lie to you, baby girl,” he smiled darkly as her eyes rolled back, “Do you think that low of me?”

“No, daddy,” she pouted, making him hum in approval, “But you tell me to be a good girl and respect my professors, even if I don’t like them.”

“You’re right, sweet girl,” he smiled softly, releasing her hair before both of his hands wrapped around her thighs tightly. “But I don’t like this professor of yours very much. And I doubt anyone else will appreciate what he had to say about our perfect girl either.”

“But what if he’s right, daddy?” She sighed, her gaze dropping to her hands, “I’m not as smart or talented or driven as the rest of you,” she mumbled sadly.

“Nope, none of that. What’s rule number two?” Namjoon asked seriously, catching her chin between his fingers and tilting her head up.

“I’m not allowed to talk badly about myself,” she mumbled, staring into his eyes.

“That’s right,” He nodded, “Now hold onto me,” he instructed before propelling himself off the couch, keeping her pressed tightly to him as he headed up the stairs to his bedroom.

“Namjoon! Put me down! I’m too—“

“If you say one more negative thing about yourself today, baby girl, I’ll tell Yoongi and I’ll let him decide what your punishment is, you got that?” He said

Her arms wrapped around his neck tightly, “Am I being punished right now?” She whispered into his neck, almost afraid of what the answer was going to be.

“No baby,” he said kicking his bedroom door closed with his heel before settling against his headboard, not letting her move off his lap. “You need to remember how important you are, and how loved you are. I can see you doubting yourself, and me, so we’re going to try something.”

She nodded, grateful that he was able to understand her as intimately as he did. One look and he knew how vulnerable she was, and she trusted him to take care of her needs. His plush lips met hers firmly, making her melt further into his embrace. There was something about the way he kissed her that rendered her brain useless. Her hips started rocking against him of their own volition, his hard length dragging against her core.

She almost didn’t realize his hands were already under her dress until she heard a loud rip, a small gasp flying out of her mouth. “I’m sorry, baby, I’ll buy you a new pair, but I’m not letting you out of my arms,” he shrugged, a finger sinking into her heat. She whined loudly at the intrusion, her hands finding purchase in his wheat coloured hair. She’d helped him choose the colour after he lost a bet against Hoseok. “Fuck, you’re so wet for me already. You’re my good girl, aren’t you?” He asked sweetly, making her cheeks flush.

“I always try to be good for you,” she sighed. Namjoon’s hands always made her feel good, giving her more pleasure than pain, and rarely teasing her. Those giant hands of his — the ones everyone else said were the cause of destruction — were only used to destroy her sanity when they were on her body. His long, thick fingers could reach spots she could only dream of, and always managed to remain gentle, even in the most heated moments.

“You’re such a good girl, baby,” he smiled tenderly, removing his finger from her entrance. But before she could protest, his tip was at her entrance, making her eyes roll back. “That’s it, just take my cock nice and slow, baby girl,” he said encouragingly, holding her hips in his hands. He inched himself inside her, painstakingly slow as she whined and shuddered against him, “You’re doing so good,” he whispered into her hair, voice low and raspy.

“Daddy,” she keened desperately, burying her face in his neck as she showered the exposed golden skin in affection, leaving a collection of hickeys across his chest. “Please, don’t tease me,” she whispered before he bottomed out, dragging a breathy moan from her.

He chuckled softly, trailing his fingers up and down her back to calm her, “I’m not going to fuck you into the mattress like I know you want me to,” he grinned, but her mind had gone blank. All she could focus on was how full she felt; it wasn’t an entirely new sensation, but it was usually accompanied by him pounding into her like he had a point to prove. Namjoon was huge everywhere, and he’d always made her feel deliriously fucked out whenever they were together but now, just sitting with him inside her made her realize how entirely consuming he could be when he wanted to be. She felt like she was floating, only half in reality as he settled her weight against him as he saw fit.

She was almost dizzy at the sensation, her words slurring as he held her hips against his with one arm, “Fuck, daddy, ‘m so full,” she mumbled, her hands shaking as she clung to him, eyes trying to focus on his face.

She could see his proud smile, “My perfect little girl, so full she can’t focus,” he hummed happily. Her eyes rolled back as he pulled her almost impossibly closer, changing the angle as her face came to rest against his chest, cradling the back of her head in his hand.

If her mind hadn’t been blank before, it was now. The gentle lull of his heartbeat in her ear, combined with the mind numbing fullness, and the comfort and security of Namjoon’s embrace had her nodding dumbly.

“We’re gonna sit like this until everyone else comes home, and then we are going to remind you how perfect you are,” he explained, getting a slow nod in return. She was struggling to stay coherent, and he knew it. “God, you look so good like this baby, so perfect. Your eyes are all glassy and your cheeks are flushed,” he smiled, lifting one of his fingers to her lips to trace over the curve of her Cupid’s bow.

She gazed up at him through her eyelashes, taking the pad of his finger into her mouth, “Thank you daddy,” she mumbled, not bothering to remove his finger from her lips.

A low hum emanated from Namjoon’s chest as he stared down at her lovingly. Exhaustion overwhelmed her, the security of unconsciousness threatening to pull her under. “Daddy’s got you, baby girl,” he cooed softly, “Just rest. I’ll be right here when you wake up.”

Tagging @bibbykins @walkxthexmoon @blushingatyou @smasmashie for telling me to post this 🥴 sorry it’s like a week later than I said

#namjoon smut #kim namjoon smut #college Namjoon au #college bts au #namjoon fluff #Kim Namjoon fluff #Namjoon fic #kim namjoon fic #bts fic #bts smut #bts fanfiction #bts non idol au #ot7 college poly au #ot7 x reader #namjoon x reader

[zaceouiswriting]

Fairy Prince - Hearts of Leviathans - Ch.11

Character: Sky x male reader, Riven x male reader, Brandon x male reader

Universe: Somewhere in Winx Club/Saga

Warnings: None

Slowly I wake up from a deep, restful sleep. When I open my eyes, I see that the room is still shrouded in darkness and that no sound can be heard within these walls. It almost seems like a dream. But my rumbling stomach suddenly shows me why I woke up. Still sleepy, I just wanted to turn over and sleep longer.

Unfortunately, my body doesn't appear to be fond of this notion. It leaps from a hungry growl to a painful reminder of who's in charge. "Damn, you're not serious," I mumble angrily at my body. I swear if my body could do that, it would grin contentedly. Almost as if my body had its own thoughts.

Since my body leaves me no choice, I get up, go to the window and open the curtains. The garish light from outside blinds me for a moment. "Gahhh! Stupid idea!"

Blinded, I turn to escape the light, to hopefully see my life again. After only a few steps it gets a little darker, making me a little calmer. More relaxed now, I take longer steps, only to suddenly feel something standing in my way, stopping me harshly. But when I realized it was already too late. I land face-first on the floor with a violent thud. Like an idiot, I spread my arms instead of using them to break my fall.

Can this morning be any more stressful? Just as this thought is slowly running through my head, a knock on my bedroom door brings me back to the situation.

"Coming!" I call to whoever dares to disturb me on the very cozy stone floor. I push myself off the ground with some difficulty. Back on my feet, I immediately started to walk to the door. By doing so, I pass a mirror. Although I felt like I shouldn't do it, I take one quick look seeing my body in bad shape. And to be honest? I really shouldn't have even looked. My reflection broke something deep inside me. Nothing was left from the muscles hardened by war. Nothing showed my earlier hardships, for never has a blade scratched my body during the war. Now there was just a skinny little boy looking back at me. Pretty depressing. There's a way to get back in shape quickly, but it won't be enjoyable.

But there wasn't much time to sink deep into grief because someone was waiting for me, which under other circumstances would be annoying. So I used the few seconds to get to the door and wallow in the overwhelming sadness. Dressed only in a thin shirt and underwear, I take the gold handle and push it down, slowly opening the door.

"Nice to see you're finally awake! My name is Cory. I'm a senior, and here to-"

"Since when does an a'Fulgenor bow to one of my family?" I couldn't hold my mouth from speaking or smirking widely at him.

He stayed silent, his right hand still resting on his chest, slightly below his shoulder, as he was frozen in his bowing position. But even then, I could see his wide eyes and a sour expression. He straightened his back from his bowing position and dropped his hand. "What are you doing here?" His voice is so deliciously poisonous. It almost makes me want to laugh.

"Nice to see you too, Cory. How are you doing? Haven't seen you in quite a while."

"Yes, since you arranged for the engagement between me and Lady Arabella d'Monter to be broken."

"I couldn't let a sweet girl like her... marry a man from your family. You know that,” I said mischievously.

A heavy silence spreads over us. His face shows disgust and disapproval. But only for a second before his lips break into a wide grin. He looks sheepishly in both directions. His suspicious behavior makes me nervous as the twinkle in his eyes has never been something good. But before I could even think of moving back, his two strong arms suddenly pulled me towards him. He hugged me tightly to his firm chest. I felt relief wash over him. His arms are wrapped so tightly around me. His hands embrace me with ease. But his scent... the smell was so homely that I felt protected, as I always did when we were younger.

I enjoy this moment a second longer than necessary and even snuggle up against his broader chest. Luckily I'm not strong enough to cry if I were waterfalls would fall from my eyes, that's for sure.

Cory didn't say a word the whole time, for which I'm grateful. We both know how much it would hurt my pride. And my pride is the last thing that's mine that no one can take away from me, unlike anything else.

I carefully free myself from his tight grip. His eyes filled with held-back tears, making them sparkle like amethysts.

Still close together, I brush a few strands of hair away from his face. "I guess I have to thank the stars that you're standing here, in front of me, and not one of the other three idiots, don't I?"

His head tilts to one side, staring at me with wonder. "I'm sure you've heard about it. A guy got into Alfea, made a ruckus, and got arrested by three specialists.”

"Was that you?" he asked in complete shock, but a short chuckle broke from him anyway.

“Yup.“

"But you are a fairy!" He burst out angry. "I've been already wondering why you're here! Rumor has it that a dangerous, unruly mage with nefarious intentions has somehow breached the fairy barrier. They even boast about your capture and are certain they will be made "Knights of Honor" for it.” Cory's face was twisted in disgust the entire time he retold the story how he had heard it.

I could only shake my head. "Someone tried to kill me here," I threw nonchalantly in, obviously shocking Cory even further. "Therefore, no one should be trusted here. Maybe they're not just after me.” Quickly I take his hand in mine. My body isn't fully restored yet, but I could use the immense magical power soaring through me for something useful. "Do you have an… item you always carry with you?"

He's perplexed by my question and seems to think for a while. But then he suddenly jumps into action. Pulling up his sleeve, I could immediately see a piece of metal that I know all too well.

“You still have it?“

"Of course," he tells me with a big, honestly silly smile, "it was made by my favorite brother and the future of our great world!"

My eyes widen, blush appears on my cheeks. "Idiot," I murmur with a fond, hidden smile. I need to divert his attention from my face, so I grab the bracelet with both hands. As I felt the magic rush through me like a current, the air around us began to compress. The pressure finally shattered the bracelet into a million pieces. Although my focus was almost entirely on the bracelet, I could still see the sadness in Cory's eyes, the shimmer of a layer of tears over them. But he remains strong and doesn't dare to shed a single tear. He's been so preoccupied he hasn't even seen the dirt I've conjured up.

With even more magical pressure, a bright, earthy green light surrounds the bracelet, stunning the much older man in front of me.

I soon felt that the strenuous activity was taking a toll on my already ailing health. Pushing back my exhaustion, I push more magic into the bracelet until I see the results slowly unfold.

I stare at it with a relieved look and slowly let my magic fade away, saving me from burning out from accumulating too much magic. If Cory hadn't come to me, I would have gone outside and wasted most of it. At least I could put it to good use.

As the earthy, green light slowly faded, Cory's eyes widened, still glistening with the same tears. "Wow!" he commented on his newly formed bracelet. The silver is much purer than I could have done as a child. It was now braided from several thin silver threads into one of three thick braids tied together. In between are small green and brown diamonds created by the immense magical pressure and the dirt I conjured up.

“What? How?“

"We both know that you will be the one to become a Parrihan. You will need some extra protection," I tell him quietly. Usually, an artifact made by the Protector of our world is given at the "Thousand Star Ceremony" to herald a new Parrihan. But considering someone tried to kill me. I can't let someone as promising as Cory die with me.

He's obviously taken aback and doesn't know what to say. So I took his arm like a lady would do with her partner at a ball and pulled him with me, effectively using him as a crutch. I would never say out loud that my body is so weak. He would only want to give me my magic back to heal me, even though my magic is the reason I'm so fragile.

"Let me put some clothes on and take a shower. Then we can do whatever you're here to do."

Without saying anything else, I sat him down in a chair, got some clothes that Grandpa most likely got for me, and happily, if a little clumsily, went to the bathroom.

Stalking beneath the warm water conjured by a magical crystal bound to the wall of the room, evidently drawing magic from the ground. So I ask myself: How does the magic crystal know how I like my water? It's warm but not hot, just right for me.

The amazement faded when a flood of ice-cold water suddenly flowed down my body. I tried very hard to hold it back, but when it reached the end of my back, I couldn't anymore. "Ahhh!" I scream loudly, maybe even a bit shrill.

Before I knew it, the bathroom door was flung open. Cory's panicked amethyst eyes searched the room for the reason for my scream until they focused on me and my… naked glory. "You don't look so good." His voice was soft, caring even.

Stunned at his audacity, I could only stare at him, hurt. “Well, thank you to your comrades. So shut up and tell me how to raise the temperature of this stupid crystal and keep it at the temperature I want!”

Immediately his eyes dropped, hopefully, ashamed of what happened to me. Without looking at me, he stepped forward, even waiting for me to get out of his way, and then tapped onto something I'd haven't seen before a display.

"With this screen, you can control the water temperature down to the smallest detail and even across several different functions of how the water is dispensed."

He walked backward, turned away, didn't even look in the mirror, and closed the door with his back to the bathroom. 

Only when he left could I breathe easily again. Stepping back under the water, I sighed with relief as the warm water poured over my still-hurting body again.

Looking down at my now scrawny body, anger rises in my stomach. How could this happen? Where were all the security precautions? But most importantly, how the heck am I supposed to get my body back into shape? I have to fight against specialists in training, but like this, I couldn't even hurt a piece of paper. Should I... No, I can't! It's really too dangerous! I shouldn't even consider it!

But while I'm still staring at my body, I already know, deep down, that my decision has already been made. "Fuck it!" I say out loud. Only to finish my morning shower, bracing myself for another wave of pain that will soon test my limits again. Only this time, the probability of dying will be much lower than these stupid magic-suppressing handcuffs.

Exiting the bathroom, washed and barefoot, with only a towel covering what Corey has already seen, I head back to the bedroom. Standing in the middle, I finally notice that there is no sign of the older brother of one of my dearest friends. Even if it feels strange, I shrug and use the solitude to get dressed in the room. Before I could do that, however, I went to the dresser and pulled out a shirt, the only thing I forgot. All were too big for my fragile statue, but I took one anyway. After all, I did not want anyone to see my body like this. This problem wouldn't last long, and Grandpa seems to have smelled something like that already. If not, he would have given me clothes that would fit my current body and not the one I lost in my shirt captivity.

Once again, I stepped to the center of the room, this time fully clothed and with my eyes closed. I could feel the magic that resides and surrounds everything dancing around me as it hadn't done since I'd soaked my hands in blood. I take a few deep breaths, asking the magic to show me where Cory went. Magic quickly began to travel through the air.

It didn't even take a second to find him. Involuntarily I open my eyes, only to roll them, realizing the older I have always known has not changed a single bit, even after the rigorous training at this academy. I silently thank the magic for helping me. It waved me off by wrapping me tightly as if to hug me. Lowly chuckling, I go over to the bedroom door leading to the hallway and knock on it twice. I wait a second and knock three more times, only to crack the door open. "I thought you ran away."

Corey didn't answer me. His gaze is strictly forward, apparently not ready to meet mine just yet. For now, it probably would be the best not to push it any further.

"Take me to the cafeteria. I could eat an entire Rhintora raw."

Worldless, he leads me there, leaving me wondering what I can do to make him understand that what I said wasn't an attack on him or the Institution of Specialists, which Corey wouldn't be a part of for long anyway if he really wants to become a Parrihan.

However, I know, as it is with me, his pride often gets in his way, and this is just an extension of that. That's one of many reasons we became friends, even though he's older than me.

Hopefully, a little time would close this crack in our understanding.

[Masterlist]

#brandon x male reader #brandon #sky x male reader #sky #riven x male reader #riven #winx club x male reader #winx saga x male reader #winx club #winx saga #series #fairy prince

[cloudninetonine]

A past that still haunts me

A/N: Hey guys, it's me (ya boi) I'm back with my still current hyper fixation Genshin Impact and a vent fic because I've been really stressed and well, it's hard living in my house :) It's a hurt/comfort fic because they always get to me and I needed to make something for myself

I am willing to do aftermath where the boys confront the abuser or do scenario but with different characters

Synopsis: You’re not a damsel in distress, you never have been and you never will be, but, well, sometimes you need a hero to rely on and that’s okay

Characters: Diluc, Kaeya, Zhongli and Childe

Warnings: Hints to past abuse, confrontation of abuser, violence, mentions of blood, threats, foul language

It had meant to be like any other menial day of an adventurer: sign in with Katheryne, complete your commissions, sign out with Katheryne with your payments - done and dusted.

But that wasn’t how it went, no, far from it - archons, so damn far from it.

“Thank you once again, (Name)” Katheryne’s smile was kind like usual, holding that familiar feeling of gratitude as she handed over your remission within a marked package, hand returning to the desk’s polished surface once you had taken it graciously, sending her a beaming grin back. “The Guild really appreciates your work ethic when it comes to the Ruin machines, it’s hard to come across adventurers who want to handle them anymore”

You sent her a shrug as you placed away the box “Can’t blame them really, they’re a hard bunch to handle- I was terrified of them when I first started too, but I had my vision to help me out, a lot of these folk only use there pure determination to eradicate them, gotta admire that!”

She laughed along with you politely “Have a good evening, (Name), I’ll see you again tomorrow?”

“Of course you will!” You backpedalled away from the guild reception, throwing the woman a polite double fingered salute as you did “Ad astra abyssoque as they say, my fair lady!”

She parrotted back her usual phrase before disappearing into the building, you walking further down the path of the city for your final activity for that day.

Of course, you didn’t reach that far, after all, it wasn’t that menial day you had expected, that you had wanted. Life was cruel sometimes, so incredibly cruel for no justified reason just for the sake of it all and you wished, archons, you wished you could rewind the clock and stop yourself from bumping into the body, to save yourself from all the repressed trauma bursting forth like a flurry of butterflies, well, more like moths, disgusting, ungodly, monster moths that aimed straight for the face.

“Sorry!” You yelped, too preoccupied with gathering your pocketwatch you had dropped in the stumble to see who it had been, after all, you were on a schedule and you didn’t want to be-

“(Name)?”

...late.

All of a sudden, time didn’t seem to exist, or maybe it was moving way too slowly from that horrid spike of adrenaline that shot into your bloodstream as soon as the voice registered.

You hoped to the Archons that it wasn’t, that it couldn’t, but did the gods hear your prayers?

“Oh Archons, it is you! It’s been such a long time!”

Of course, they did, they just didn’t care to listen. Ignoring the cries of your people were in fashion to them these days.

They stood there with a smile so excited it almost seemed to tear their face in half, with eyes sparkling with recognition after so many years away from them, they opened their arms welcoming you into their embrace like it was something just so normal for the two of you like you would come bounding to them like a lost puppy who had finally found their master.

The fear of your abuser dwarfed in comparison the pure feral rage and loathing to think that they even deserved to be breathing in the same space as you.

People were looking, of course, they were looking, you knew what they were doing, being bright and jovial, bringing others attention towards you both so that whatever scene you caused would be your fault like you were the bad guy. It was old tactics, of course, you wouldn’t dare do anything when you were younger, you’d just push through it, but this wasn’t old times, this wasn’t younger you, scared, smaller you afraid them, this was you now, a warrior, unwavering in battle, a person who smiled in the face of danger, who laughed at the pitiful fights that 2- no- 4 abyss mages brought to you!

To hell what other people thought, you’d stomp their head into the cobblestone if they had so much as poked you.

“Come here and give me a-”

You took a step back, mustering the deadliest face you could, but you wavered, it was only natural, no matter how much you could try to hype yourself up, this person was your first true experience of real-life nightmares, the first person to bring you true pain, no matter how many ruin guards, hunters, millachurls, mages- anything you faced, nothing could prepare you to face your first fear:

The fear of your older sibling.

“If you fucking touch me I’ll stab you-” The growl cracked nearing the end, you were always an angry crier but you were not about to fall back to this- this monster. “In front of all these people, I won’t hesitate”

Their face dropped followed by your stomach, though, the food you had for lunch sure did feel its way up your gullet.

“What’s with your language? We haven’t seen each other in four years and this is how you treat me? Your older sibling?” They laughed in disbelief because onlookers would think they were shocked, I mean, how could you speak to family like that? But they didn’t know, they didn’t know the words they had told you, the insults, the threats, those tight grabs, those beatings- they didn’t know, so they obviously didn’t know that the shock came from the fact that you had stood up to them.

You licked your lips to get rid of the dryness, but the problem you faced was that your mouth had dried out along with them, as did your throat.

Don’t let them turn this on you, don’t let them get the upper hand, you were better than them, so much better.

“You’re not my fucking sibling” You spat, feeling the air vibrate around you, a sudden shine from your cloak hinted you to the cause “You haven’t been for a long time, don’t fucking try that shit with me”

There it was, that familiar enraged spark, that look of hatred on their face, the thing that warned you about what you said had been the right thing to set them off, that they were just as easily triggered by the smallest act of rebellion just like when you were kids.

Of course, they hadn’t changed.

Evil never did.

They took a step forward but you didn’t back off, just hardened your resolve as they leaned in menacingly, as though their stupid little intimidation tactic still worked after all these years.

You told yourself it didn’t but you knew deep down that wasn’t completely true.

“Don’t speak to me like that, (Name)” Facade gone, they showed you what they really were, what they were really like after all, “Don’t you ever speak to me like that, you show me fucking respect”

Respect?

RESPECT!?

Oh Archons, you were angry, no, seething from the thought that they ever deserved respect.

That pathetic piece of shit, that gruelling pleb, mere gum on the bottom of your damn shoe-

You’d kill them, right here, right now.

You felt the familiar materialisation begin to form in your hand when another voice called out, a familiar loving one that nearly made your throat swell from relief.

“(Name)?”

Diluc

He could sense the tension. Of course, he could sense the tension, Diluc had faced this tension so many times before, he was practically the one that owned such a vibe anytime Kaeya even breathed near him for a second longer than necessary.

But being the one to witness it, to see you, the usual awkward, goofy sweetheart stare at another with such overbearing malice made him uneasy, caused his stomach to churn in ways he didn’t like, set him off in a way that was only reserved for the most chilling on moments.

Diluc wondered what exactly this stranger had done to warrant such a reaction from you.

“(Name)?” The redhead called, glancing around the many citizens of Mondstadt that watched the exchange with intrigue, guard and worry, eyes focused on the scene of this foreign stranger and fuming you, hand poised by your side with weapon particles dancing on your palm.

When Diluc finally made it over, his form seemed to curl protectively around you, hand landing on the small of your back delicately while keeping face with the person, eyes narrowed dangerously but still holding an air of civilness.

A true gentleman, even when you were close to merking some rando.

“Is there a problem?”

The stranger straightened immediately, backing up a few steps with their hands up in defence, sending Diluc a charming smile that the man could see through crystal clear.

“No problem, no problem at all” They glanced back at you, seemingly friendly despite his partner’s obvious ill intent that radiated off you in waves “Isn’t that right, (Name)?”

Diluc saw you tense up once again, the buzz from your Vision rising in volume with your obvious anger as you tightened your first, ready to just screw your weapon and go for the throat.

“If that is the case” The noble’s hand softly pressed against your back, gently but coaxing, knowing that conflict in the middle of the town centre would just bring the knights to meddle in affairs that they had no business attending “Then we shall be going”

“There’s no need to leave, after all, my sibling and I were just chatting”

He paused, shouldering a questioning glance your way but at the sight of your unruly expression, he pushed down his enquiries and once again began coaxing you away from the scene. Angel’s Share had already been open for a while, meaning the usual folk would already be settled in, but the storage room was sure to be a good place to chat and to calm you down, all he needed to do was get you away.

“We already had plans” The side glance had the stranger- your sibling, biting their tongue, brows furrowing in a known annoyance as the two of you began your way towards the pub, you still vibrating in anger. “Good day to you”

The two of you had made it a few feet when they called out once again “Don’t worry, (Name), I’ll see you again real soon”

Diluc’s arm tightened around you faster than you could react, tugging you away quickly “Diluc-”

“No, (Name)”

“Stay out-”

“Not here” Sharing a look, he softened at the shine in your eyes. “You’ll just attract the knights' attention”

You didn’t care, no, not one bit. If the knights had dared to interfere at that moment, they too would have been caught up in your blinded revenge, thrown aside or slashed down without single care just to finally eradicate the bane of your existence and you didn’t care about what consequences you brought about, you just didn’t and you made sure to tell Diluc that, as soon as you had the privacy of Angel’s Share’s storeroom, pacing up and down while he stood off to the side against the wall, watching silently.

“You had no right to get in my way!” You snapped, voice shaking from the pure emotions you were releasing “I finally had my chance, I was finally going to do it! They deserve to end by my hand, by my decision, after the years of torture they put me through! They deserved it! And you got in my way! How could you get in my way! I-”

Pushing off the wall, he slowly advanced towards you, carefully, hands out like he was approaching a wounded animal.

“I understand you’re upset-”

“I’m not upset!” You cried at him, stopping mid-step before dropping your head and tightly, grabbing your hair in your hands “I’m not upset! I’m angry! I’m so fucking angry! And I deserve to be fucking angry! I-”

The sob ripped through your throat despite you trying to hold it back, tears finally gathering in your eyes and rapidly falling down your cheeks “You should have let me kill them! I should have had the chance to rid the world of their evil! It’s not fair! It’s not- it’s not fair, I-”

You didn’t bother to fight him when his arms finally wrapped around you, just fell against him as you wept. The pent up rage, fear and sadness from years of repression taking its toll as you cried, your partner whispering sweet words as he raked his hand through your hair gently and leaned his head against yours.

“I’m sorry” His hand held your cheek fondly, ruby red staring back into your own eyes with a softness that made you melt “I didn’t know this meant so much to you, but if you’re willing to tell me, I’ll listen. I’ll always listen”

With another choked sob, you leaned into his hold “Please just hold me for now”

And he did just that.

Kaeya

The captain had promised to meet you at his office, a simple task really but with the lingering presence of Jean and the words ‘There’s so much work that needs to be done’ leaving her lips he bolted, hoping to catch you by the Guild and drag you to Angel Share for your date. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to help her, it was just he had already promised you this night and Eula could have always taken his place with paperwork, her threat of “vengeance” as she liked to call it could wait for another day.

It was also due to the fact he had no intentions of filing any paperwork for as long as he could avoid it, but that was his secret to be kept.

Being the perspective man he was, he could tell straight away he had walked into something tense, surveying the surrounding people of Mondstadt who looked on in concern, the unbridled rage upon your face, the obviously intimidating lean that the stranger held over you- something was wrong and he knew he had to put a stop to it.

“(Name)?” You glanced for a single moment before your furious glare had returned to the stranger, another flag waving right in his face as he approached, “My dear? Who might this be?”

Before you could snap, lip curling in disgust, the stranger stood back to their full height, switching quickly with a fake charming smile that practically mirrored his own, holding out their hand towards him “(S/N) (Last), (Name)’s older sibling. it’s nice to meet you”

Kaeya’s smile widened and despite the glare from you that was now focused on him, he shook your sibling's hand in-kind “Kaeya Alberich, (Name)’s partner-”

He made sure to tighten his grip with his last words “And Cavalry Captain of the Knights of Favonius”

Successfully, as he always was, Kaeya held back the smug, mocking grin that itched to climb onto his face when the neck of your sibling bobbed nervously, forehead reflecting the afternoon light as sweat gathered on their brow.

The man hadn’t obviously threatened them, surely, Kaeya was smarter than that, but then again, he could still present himself as a threat, a good one and well, his title was a menacing one when it came to the right moment. ‘Try anything and not only do I have the authority to kick your arse but the power to put you in a place many didn’t dare even step’ shortened into an innocent sentence with only 8 words.

“Cavalry Captain? That’s quite impressive” They laughed off, tugging away their hand awkwardly when Kaeya continued to keep a firm grip, his present eye focused solely on your siblings face. They glanced over to you “Quite an achievement for you, aye (Name)?”

You growled, “I’ll show you an achievement-”

Kaeya’s arm had wrapped around your waist not a second later, tugging you tighter to his side as the two of you turned, the man throwing your sibling a smile over his shoulder.

“As nice as it was to meet you, (S/B), we must be going”

And then without another word Kaeya dragged you away, heading in the direction of your home instead of Angel Share tavern, feeling your pure, unfiltered anger the whole way along with the citizens as they parted ways, rushing off from your rage.

It was only when you had returned to the sanctuary of your abode did you snap, jerking away from your boyfriend with angered strides and beginning your seething lecture towards him, moving up and down through the living room while he ventured off into the kitchen, grabbing 2 glasses and a bottle of wine.

“How dare you Kaeya! How fucking dare you! Do you have any idea what you were doing back there!? What was even happening back there!? So much for being the most observant man in Mondstadt because you seemed pretty dense to me the whole fucking time!” Your hands raked through your hair as you yelled, trying so hard to hold back the tears “I didn’t need your damn help, Kaeya! Nor did I fucking want it! Know to stay out of someone's business when it isn’t wanted!”

Logically you knew what he had done, you were smart like that and you knew Kaeya long enough to know what he was doing but your rage, fear and sadness blocked out everything in that moment, made you blind to reality, made you only think irrationally and Kaeya didn’t blame you for that. He could never blame you for that.

Though, it did hurt him to see you in this state.

“Wine?”

You gawked at him for a moment, staring at him with shock and confusion as he held out a wine glass towards you, another held in his other hand and a sweet smile plastered on his face, before your moment morphed into rage, grabbing the drink from his hand and tossing it towards the wall, the red wine splattering over the wallpaper and glass shards falling to the floor.

“Well, that was a waste-”

“Do you think I’m an idiot, Kaeya!?” You cried, not even bothering to hold back anymore as the tears fell and your voice cracked, hand pointing accusingly in his face “Is this some kind of joke to you!? Huh!? Am I a fool in your eyes!? Some sort of blubbering idiot!? Why must you- why do you-”

The second glass was placed on the dresser by you both, Kaeya’s hand coming to hold your cheek fondly while the other came to grab your hand that dangled in the air, still poised at him “I don’t think you're either of those, my dear, in fact, I think you’re one of the brightest in the whole of Teyvat, nevermind Mondstadt”

You hiccuped “Then why-”

Brushing away the wetness from your cheek, he brought your hand to his mouth to place a fond kiss on your palm “Because you mustn’t cry, (Name), don’t waste your tears on someone like them”

“I’m not crying, I’m-”

He shushed you gently and you finally relaxed, falling into his embrace with a heavy heart “-I’m not, I swear-”

Within the familiarity of your home, you wept in his arms, exhausted from the whirlwind of emotions and the scenes that had transpired that day, ready to just curl into yourself and try to block the flooding memories of history. Although, having Kaeya at that moment helped more than he could ever know, having him to rely on made it all so much easier to cope with that day.

“Tell me what ails you and I’ll listen” Brushing back some hair, he pressed a kiss to your head.

“Can..can we just stay like this for a while?”

“Of course, my dear”

Zhongli

He had sensed the incoming danger like it had been revealed in some sort of premonition. Maybe it had been a skill he had acquired after his long, eventful life, maybe it was his connection to Liyue and his citizens, but for some reason, as he sat before Iron Tongue Tian as the man recalled his tales of ancient Liyue like usual, Zhongli knew that the crowd that was forming around Wamin Restaurant had something that he need urgently attend, especially when even Tian paused his story to glance around the corner of the restaurant building to see the commotion.

When the archon had finally borne witness to the scene, he paused within the crowd, surveying the surroundings carefully. You were the centre of attention, along with another stranger, both glaring at one another with anger and disgust, though your own anger seemed to double compared to the other’s, seeing as your weapon was slowly materialising in your grip. Zhongli could also see Guild Master Lan making her way down the steps leading to the Guild reception, a worried expression on her face glancing between you and the approaching Millelith.

Zhongli made his decision, politely pushing through the crowd until he had finally made it by your side, hand being placed gently on your arm “(Name)?”

Both you and the stranger glanced at him, but he paid no mind to them, only held eye contact with you when Lan appeared by your other side, glaring at the stranger with a hardened gaze.

“Are you harassing my guild member?”

Before the stranger could respond, the Millelith had also popped in, glancing between you and them “Is there a problem?”

Zhongli had taken up your view when Lan began her take, she had borne witness for much longer than he had of course and he was certain that you were in no state to talk to the guards. Your eyes were glazed with hatred, pupils pinpricks in a sea of (E/C) and your hands were shaking, balled into fists.

If anything, he needed to try and calm you down first.

“Get the hell out of my way, Zhongli” Your teeth ground together, words shaking with anger “Don’t push yourself into my business”

“I’m sorry, my love, but I can’t do that” He tried brushing your cheek but you jerked away, glaring at his hand before glaring back at him, in no mood to be coddled “I don’t want you to do something you’d regret”

“Trust me, I won’t regret this one bit”

Zhongli held his tongue for the question that almost rolled out, knowing now wasn’t the time for inquiries when the stranger’s voice rang out, condescending and snarky as they addressed you.

“Still need people to protect you, aye (Name)? Of course, you’re still the same pathetic bitch from years ago”

You were lucky for your reputation around Liyue, for the picture of the kind and caring adventurer that had swept through the town from your years of living here because had it not been for that, you pushing aside your boyfriend and materialising your weapon to aim it at your sibling’s throat would have had you in cuffs that instant.

Lan grabbed you, tugging you away as you screamed “I’ll show you pathetic you fucker! Let me go!”

The Millelith didn’t wait to drag your sibling away, much to their cries of dismay, one sending Lan a nod while you continued to fight against her, crying out in frustration.

“Kid, you have to calm down-”

“Calm down!? No! Get the hell off me!”

Zhongli watched as you finally broke away, huffing and puffing up a storm before glancing amongst the crowd, staring at their worried and concerned faces, your own eyes tearing up before you looked away pushing past the crowd to find somewhere to be alone.

When Lan went to call out for you, Zhongli raised his hand, the two sharing a look before the archon made his way after you, his longer legs keeping a steady pace to which he could catch up to you, just beyond the bridge that led into Liyue Harbour. There were no people where you stood, just the lush green plants and great mountains of nature, a perfect place for you to let out your frustration without the prying eyes of the citizens.

“(Name)-”

“Leave me alone!” You cried, curling into yourself with your back turned to him “I don’t want you here, Zhongli! Nor did I want you back there! I didn’t need your or anyone else's help!”

You knew he was here from a place of concern, and deep down you begged that your words didn’t harm him in any way, but currently, you didn’t care, you didn’t want to care, you just wanted to be numb, numb to the flashbacks of your horrid past and numb to the feelings that were dragged along with them.

“My love, please, return with me to our home, I will brew some calming tea-”

“Tea? Tea!? Does it look like I want any fucking tea?! I couldn’t care any less about some fucking tea, Zhongli!” Spinning around on your heels, you scowled at him, not bothering to hide your rushing tears “Don’t you get it!? I want to be left alone, I-”

Two gloved hands gently encased your face, your angered expression morphing into one of shock as your partner stared down at you with glowing eyes filled with a deep-rooted love, affection, worry and so much more that you couldn’t put into mere mortal words. At that moment, everything felt as if it had melted away, only you and him were in this world, nothing else, just the two of you.

And you felt as though your heart had been lifted from the pressures of this life.

“I do not think it is best for you to be left alone” His baritone voice was always so calming, so serene and in your sane moment, you finally felt its effects “I wish to stay with you, so please, let me stay”

With a whimper, you grabbed onto his forearms and leaned your face into his hands, tears continuing to fall as your eyes fluttered shut “Okay…”

“They have hurt you deeply, haven’t they?”

Hesitantly, you nodded.

“Would you be so kind as to tell me the details?”

“I-...” Sharing eye contact once again, you whispered “Can- can you just...hold me for now? Please”

Moving his hands from your face, he engulfed you in his arms, leaning his head against yours “Of course”

Childe

The Harbinger had just left the Northland Bank, hell, he was just about to make his way down the spiral staircase but when hearing the commotion, he paused, something in his gut telling him to check just before and he was glad he did.

Glancing over the elevated walkway, he felt a fiery pit roar in the depths of his stomach, eyes narrowing dangerously at the scene; you were snarling in some other person’s face, their own face nothing short of disgust and a crowd that only seemed to grow by the minute.

Who the hell did this person think they were? Did they even know who you were? To stand so close to you, with a look of threat on their face like you weren’t about to kick their arse? Like he wasn’t about to kick their arse? How did this insignificant speck of dross not know your connections with him, the 11th Harbinger? Or did he know and was just trying his luck?

“Seems like someone has a death wish” And a death wish they had indeed.

Ignoring the perplexed glance from his subordinate stationed outside the building's entrance, Childe made his way down the steps, murderous look stitched on the whole way to the circle of civilians, the mass parting ways for the man that was Tartaglia and continuing to watch the moment in silence.

“Who the hell are you-” You both turned towards him, you in shock while the stranger stared in confusion until Childe’s hand wrapped around their collar, tugging them closer to look down at them with a deep-rooted disgust “-And why the hell are you harassing my partner?”

They fought against him, obviously, they did, but the surprise came when you saddled up next to him, grabbing his arm “Stay out of this, Tartaglia”

What? It hadn't been your request, no, you were always one to finish your whole fights you weren't "A damsel in distress after all!" no, you were so much more, so much greater but that look on your face, murderous and downright cruel- he just couldn't believe his ears.

Childe stared at you in shock while the stranger struggled, throwing him a dirty look in their attempts “Yeah, this is between my sibling and I”

Childe straightened in surprise, feeling embarrassment flood his system. Had he seriously just grabbed and threatened his lover’s family member? Oh, Archons, his judgement had been clouded by anger at the look of the scene, I mean, why would your sibling look at you that way-

“But it’s really no surprise that you still need to be babied, (Name), how shameful”

His eyes widened but not a moment later had you tackled your sibling, the crowd crying out in alarm as you threw back your fist and crushed their nose under the weight of your punch. “I’ll show you fucking shameful, bastard!”

There was shouting and a glance showed the oncoming Millelith marching towards the circle.

Being Fatui always did garner the attention of the guards nowadays, especially for him, who had tried to lure out the attention of their Archon by summoning an ancient god that nearly drowned the entirety of the harbour, so it was no surprise that they seemed to hurry in the pursuit when they noticed his appearance at the scene. However, lucky for him, your reputation as a great adventurer preceded you and throughout Liyue you were seen as a trusted and well-liked individual, meaning whatever trouble you got in, containing his meddling or not, was usually waved away due to the trust of the people.

So, without another thought, Childe tugged you off of your bloodied sibling and held you close, even as you thrashed violently, shouting at him to let you go.

“What is going on here?” A guard called, slamming the hilt of his polearm into the ground as he surveyed the area, eyes landing on the sibling before following the small trail of blood to you, still fighting against your boyfriend with threats falling from your lips “Was there a reason for this brawl? Who started it?”

As your sibling raised themselves on their forearms, they scowled and opened their mouth to respond, only for Childe to put in. “It was them, sir, they were the one that started it, (Name) was merely acting in self-defence”

The Millelith scowled at him, raising a brow and once again looking you over “Is that so?”

He addressed the crowd soon after “Is this what happened?”

And as expected, they all glanced over the sibling, then to you and piped up in agreement. It paid to be a hero, it seemed, the whole harbour returning the favour of years of helping out the community.

“If that’s the case, please come with us” The sibling cried out, anger and fear laced into their voice, trying to argue for their innocence only for the guards to grab them, hauling them away to archons know where while Childe did the same with you, slowly dragging you away from the scene and back into the bank, you screaming and cursing the whole way until you had made it to his office, finally managing to push him off and storming to the opposite side of the room practically seething.

“Who the hell do you think you are, Tartaglia!?” You cried, throwing out your arms in exaggeration “I didn’t need your fucking help! And why the fuck would you pull me off them!? I had them right where I wanted them and you fucking did that! Are you a moron!?”

“You had a sibling” He breathed, watching as you began to pace, muttering in an angered state “And you didn’t tell me”

“-after all these years I finally had the chance to end their pathetic excuse of a life and you just got in my fucking way! I’d waited too long for this moment and you fucking ruined it! How dare you, how fucking dare you-”

“(Name), why didn’t you tell me you had a sibling!?” He cried, walking up to you and grabbing your wrist to stop you “I was ready to kill them right there! And why are you talking about them like this!? They’re your family aren’t they-”

“They are not my fucking family!”

The scream echoed through the room, chilling Childe to the core as you ripped your arm from his grasp, running your hands through your hair before gripping it so tightly it felt close to being ripped from your head. But you didn’t care, no, you couldn’t, you were so angry and you needed something to keep you grounded, to keep yourself from losing yourself and getting lost in those haunting past memories.

The Harbinger felt his chest squeeze painfully as the tears fell down your face, red rimming your eyes and cheeks wet as you sobbed, chest heaving from trying to breathe “Family takes care of you! Family thinks of you in the highest light possible! They love you for who you are and they love you no matter what! That bastard hurt me, made me feel worthless and they refuse to believe they could do no wrong and I hate them! They are the bane of my existence! They are not my fucking family! I hate them, I hate them, I hate them, I-”

Arms were around you instantly, Childe’s face pressed into your hair as you wept, grasping onto the lapels of his suit and shoving your face into his chest to muffle your cries.

“I’m sorry” He whispered, his own eyes shining slightly “I’m sorry, I was being insensitive. Please, don’t cry”

“No, I’m not crying, I promised myself I wouldn’t-” You hiccuped “I wouldn’t waste any more tears on them-”

Then you broke off into more wails, your boyfriend holding you close and letting you continue to cry in his arms, warm and comforting until you were finally reduced to whimpers, leaning into him heavily as the remaining adrenaline in your body began to wear thin when he pressed a kiss to your forehead.

“Will...will you tell me about it?”

You sniffed “Later...just hold me for now, please, Ajax...”

His arms tightened protectively “Anything for you, my love”

#genshin impact #genshin impact x reader #genshin impact imagines #genshin impact imagine #genshin impact diluc #genshin impact diluc x reader #diluc x reader #genshin impact kaeya #genshin impact kaeya x reader #kaeya x reader #genshin impact zhongli #genshin impact zhongli x reader #zhongli x reader #genshin impact childe #genshin impact childe x reader #childe x reader #genshin impact tartaglia #genshin impact tartaglia x reader #tartaglia x reader

[its-me-im-coraline]

Birthday Surprises // Damiano David

words // 984

warnings // none

pairing // Damiano David x F!Reader

author's note // let me know if you want to be tagged. its a little stupid, with a little stupid humor cause i saw something like that online and i just... it inspire me

request // yes by @ starslazyandcozy, happy belated birthday babe, I hope you like it.

summary // Reader has her birthday and thinks Damiano has forgotten but the man has a few tricks up his sleeve.

It was a special day today. Her birthday was finally here and she could not wait to spend it with her lover. Y/N woke up that morning full of excitement - it would be the first birthday with Damiano - but the aforementioned man was nowhere to be seen. His side of the bed was empty, and cold by the time Y/N woke up, only a note there , folded in four and left on the pillow.

Good morning, amore. I did not mean to leave so early but I was needed at work. Seems some of our demos have been ruined and we might need to re-record them. There’s breakfast already made (I did promise, didn’t I? I made some waffles - yes I put syrup on top) and coffee is at the coffee maker (oh I wish it will stay tasty till you wake up).

I’ll try to be back before lunch. There’s this new place at the end of the town square - Thomas told me about it - and I thought we should go.

Have a good day dolcezza, I love you.

♡ Damiano

Not a word about her birthday. Nothing at all! Y/N tried to not start the day on a bad note, instead taking a deep breath and deciding to go and enjoy the breakfast Damiano made. Maybe he did not entirely forget. Maybe he did not have time to even think about it when he left. He must’ve already made the breakfast before they called him to go. Yeah, yes, that’s the only logical explanation. He will surely text me later.

But later never came. Y/N spend the morning entirely alone - well with the exception of Damiano’s cats. There were phone calls occupying the phone all day, from family and friends and all of that, but nothing from the one person she expected to call her the most. The man had gone in radio silence, not even a text shot her way.

By the time striked 15.00 PM Y/N was convinced Damiano forgot. Of course he did! It’s not like he does not have entirely too much on his plate. He’s so busy, I understand, she tried to convince herself but she knew that she was actually pretty upset. It did hurt that Damiano did not remember her birthday, after a whole year of being together and over 5 of being friends. It was impossible, or at least it seemed to be, but as the facts show it did happen.

“Amore, I’m back,” called Damiano entering the apartment, “are you ready to go?” He walked in the house all excited (and with a few surprises up his sleeve) but it was not reciprocated. “Amore?”

Y/N was sitting on the couch asleep in a state that the man could only explain as (very mildly and kind of falsely) depressive. There were dry tears in her face, her hair was a mess. Damiano simply could not believe it. He felt guilty, having a few ideas as to what got his girlfriend in that state but he wanted to make sure. So he did the most ‘logical’ thing he could: wake her up.

His fingers started softly running through her hair, landing on her back and rubbing it over the thin material of her his t-shirt. “Dolcezza, hey, hey baby, hi,” he whispered seeing as she slowly opened her eyes. “Happy birthday baby.” A soft kiss was all that followed his words and a soft smile of relief as he saw his love smiling as well.

“Did you sleep well?” He questioned, never pausing his very relaxing actions.

“Not really,” she said truthfully, “I thought you forgot.” The confession felt very freeing to Y/N. It had almost stressed her out - the possibility of her lover forgetting such a day.

“I could never forget you, amore-”

“Yeah but you never said happy birthday all day,” she whined a bit, slightly joking but slightly actually complaining about his actions. To his defence he was not planning on ignoring his lover, only giving the birthday wishes and gifts a little later that day, in an attempt of a surprise.

“I only wanted to surprise you,” he explained, pulling Y/N out of the couch as he got up and walked to the front door. There, by the door, on a comfortingly old chair, sat a bouquet of flowers and a big pastry shop box with two candles and a little stick that throws fire sparks taped up top and two candy bars (Y/N’s favorite). “The lady gave me those for free. She said I was - and I quote - so funny, she had to gift me at least those because she has not laughed this much in a while. I don’t even know what that means,” he laughed making Y/N laugh with him before embracing him strongly.

“Hey, get off! You have to see the cake.”

“What did you do Damiano?!”

“Nothing, open it up!” If he could be ‘too excited’ then Damiano was just that. He had this stupid little boy-ish grin all over his face, all but yelling ‘immature teenage boy’ in the most positive sense that could have. He could be an adult rockstar at 23 but sometimes his humor matched a 15 year old.

Y/N did as told, opening the box of the cake and almost falling to the floor while laughing, tears in her eyes. In the open box sat a cake in the shape of a crooked penis with a lopsided smile and a few words written on it. ‘Another year you’re alive. It will be my pleasure’. No wonder the lady found it so funny.

“Do you like it?” Questioned Damiano, not much that curious about the answer, his own entertained smile turning into laughter soon.

“I love it,” replied Y/N and kissed the man softly, “thank you.”

“Happy birthday, amore.”

tag list: @bieberhoodforever @tabi-toast @ginny-lily @moriro-da-regina @the-killer-queenie @makapaka11 @teenyweenynightghost @superchrystaldrug @selenophiliaxx

#måneskin #maneskin imagine #maneskin fanfiction #maneskin #damiano david imagine #damiano david #måneskin headcanon #måneskin x reader #måneskin imagine #måneskin fanfic

[nextdoorharry]

imaaaaagine a world like that..can you?

-

in which you and harry are exes, but still remain good friends when you’re always there for each other. both of you can’t help but reminisce…in your head.

a/n: super sorry i haven’t written in FOREVER!! been crazy busy with school (still am) and i will get back to the writing grind when i’m not as busy, with that being said this is just a quick thing i was thinking of. also, no hate to olivia and harry’s relationship at all. pr or not, both deserve respect and anything written in this piece is solely for writing purposes only. no hate will be tolerated toward an individual. we’re all human.

-

it happened when you were on your way home from dinner with your friends. a call from harry. this wasn’t out of the ordinary for harry to call you, being exes and all. you both apologized after the breakup and agreed that you both couldn’t let 5 years of love, being close with each other’s families, and a pet cat all go to waste. you agreed upon being friends with him. still hang out here and there after the breakup, acting all platonic. you can’t help but have a glimmer of hope its a call wanting to start a relationship again.

“hello?” you said, one hand on the wheel, other holding your phone.

“hi love, sorry s’a bit late, was wondering if i can come over. it’s about olivia.” harry says. still sending you butterflies when he said the simple yet warming term of endearment. but once he said olivia, your heart dropped.

she’s beautiful, confident, and makes your harry happy from what the tabloids portray. the last time you and harry spoke was before he went off to LA, filming for don’t worry darling, a movie his new lover produced. still a few texts since then like “happy birthday!” “congrats on the grammy,” or “how’s the cat?” you two always saved catching up for in person. it was just your thing you kept during the 5 year relationship and after. it keeps things more meaningful at the time, rather than texting or quick phone calls.

“ah, olivia. isn’t she my replacement?” you teased while laughing. you hear a burst of giggles from the other end of the line. god you missed hearing that everyday.

harry on the other end of the line, heart aches a bit hearing you say that. no one could ever replace you. ever. you are so special to him. if only it wasn’t for his team making it difficult for him to ease down on touring for a bit for you. you asked for one thing from harry, which was to start settling down. you both were only getting older and the talks of marriage and kids were frequently becoming the topic of discussion with family. a year and some after the breakup, which happened to be during quarantine, where he had so much time on his hands without you, he reflected on what could’ve been and how stupid he was for letting you go. you were always so patient with him. going to his shows, god awful dinner parties with industry people, changing your work schedule just to fit into his. you asked for one thing. and instead of fighting for you with his team, he instead sided with them, and let you go.

teasing not dying down, harry goes, “someone keeps up with me in the tabloids, eh?”

it’s the fact that he’s not wrong. you remember that tabloid very well. when the first pictures of harry and olivia came out in an article titled, “harry styles and olivia wilde new romance? is y/n replaced?”

your heart was hurting.

“of course i am. keep having to make sure my name is finally out their mouths.” you joke. “i’ll be home in about 15 minutes if that’s okay?”

-

you pull into the driveway already seeing harry sitting on your porch chair. he waves at you and you get out of the car, walking up to him. he stands up and greets you with a bear hug.

“missed you, y’look nice. where’d ya head out to?” he asked, hoping and praying you weren’t out on a date looking like that. he knows you only wear a red lip when its date night. his mind filled with jealousy at the thought of you with someone else. whereas he has no right being there are pictures of him kissing, cuddling, and whispering to olivia on a yacht in italy. all for the cameras. his stomach turns. that was supposed to be you and him. on a yacht on italy. except leaving the display of affection for the bedroom.

“on a date” you say blatantly.

his heart drops. and lets you go from the hug. lying through his teeth he says, “ah really? happy for ya, you have to tell me about it, hope it was with a good bloke.” he says lightly.

“i’m kiddingg, was out for dinner with friends. mel got engaged by the way! was celebratory dinner for her.” you say, unlocking the door, letting harry in.

harry sighs in relief. “that’s good! m’happy for her, pass on my congratulations.” harry follows you into your kitchen, sitting down on the counter stool, watching you making his favorite “calm down” drink, loving that you remembered how he likes it. he didn’t even have to ask you to make it. you just know its what he needs right now. he can’t help but ponder that it should have been you. it should be your friends out for your celebratory dinner for your engagement with him.

you pass him his tea, knowing he’ll only take a few sips of it yet keep it in his hold for warmth. you were on the other side of the counter across from him, making a mini cheeseboard you two can snack on while talking.

“so..what happened?” you ask, heart not ready if you can handle what he’s about to say about his new lover.

“s’just so complicated. originally it was supposed to be a pr stunt for the movie. but now i don’t know how the pr team messed up so badly but they did. no one is really believing it. everything was executed poorly. it sucks because it’s her team conducting everything which means i barely have a say in it. i look like the bad guy being portrayed as a home wrecker, and she’s not doing anything about it! s’like she’s enjoying it. the kissing, the night outs, etc. she knows that if my team did have a say, it would have been over a while ago.” he breathes out. he’s been wanting to rant to someone for so long about this. he also just wants you to know that he’s not into her. it’s all for show. he’s still all about you. he wants to make that crystal clear.

you nod your head listening to everything he’s saying. body feeling uneasy filled with jealousy when harry says she’s enjoying the intimacy they have to do for show.

“well, did you talk to her about it? or talk to jeff at least? there has to be something he can do..?” you ask.

harry sighs, “i’ve tried so hard. jeff said nothing they can do about it. and he’s telling me not to mess with olivia because her team can do more damage than good with my name. not that s’already ruined.” harry rubs his face with his hands, feeling stressed.

the way he’s acting is familiar to you. early on in your relationship, when you two were a freshly new couple, you guys wanted to be completely private. during that time, with harry and the band’s album coming out, his management made him do pr stunts like these. he was as stressed as he is now. you were so new to dating something in an industry. he didn’t want to scare you away. but you understood. you get it. and you still get it as he’s speaking.

“hmm..if i can recall, back when you had to do a stunt with kendall on the yacht, m’pretty sure it was the same situation. with kendall’s team being difficult, your’s not having much of a say. do what i told you back then, stand your ground, harry. tell olivia like you did with kendall. also kendall’s team at the time played dirty, yet they still were understanding with you and got someone new for a stunt. olivia’s team will probably get someone new as well. and how badly can they ruin your rep? everyone knows you’re the nicest person who wouldn’t kill a fly. and tabloids are tabloids. would you rather have a few bad headlines about you or would you rather deal with a stunt for what? another year now? that you feel uncomfortable with?” you state. smiling a bit because you know harry knows your right, he’s smiling a bit too. he knows you love being right and debating, pulling out facts. that’s what you always did during an argument. which is why you were always right.

man. why couldn’t he stand his ground with his team. why didn’t he take your advice back then? he should’ve sided with you. not his team. why is he always so scared of them?

self-loathing, harry breathes out a laugh, “always have to be right don’t ya? you know what to say every damn time,”

“what can i say? the lady is always right.” you say, smiling proudly while cleaning up the remains of the cheeseboard you and harry snacked on.

“thanks y/n, really, i know i can always come to you with this stuff,” harry states. looking at you with his piercing eyes, meaning every word he said.

you smiled and nodded, cleaning the kitchen a bit. it started to pour early on when you guys were having a chat about his situation, hoping silently it would come down faster so harry has an excuse to stay, you offer nonetheless. “why don’t you stay back for a bit, hm? s’pouring out there, only gonna get worse. we can watch something?”

“love island?” harry suggests.

“thought you’d never ask.”

-

few gasps and scoffs at some of the islanders and their drama later, you slowly were drifted off to sleep. harry, sitting on the other sofa from you, peaks to see if you’re still watching. his face was in awe. he misses this. domestic nights with you, chatting away eating in the kitchen, then watching something afterwards. only difference is that you two are on different sofas. whereas before you’d be coddled under his embrace. he slowly drifts off to sleep as well. rain still going on, technically he can still go home. driving in the rain was never an issue for him. but he’ll always use an excuse just to be with you.

-

iMessage: Olivia Wilde

1:34 AM - I miss you, and our casual hookups. Can’t stop thinking about it.

that was one part harry left out of the story. he hooked up with her.

-

ahhhhh!!!! lmk if you guys want a part 2!!!

#harry styles #harry #harry styles blurb #harry styles fluff #harry styles imagine #harry talk #harry styles one shot #harry styles angst #harry styles x reader #harry concept #harry styles fic

[sabxism]

Never Have I Ever

Pairing: Poe Dameron x Reader

Word count: 2k

Warnings: none besides Rose and Finn being conspiratorial little shits

Summary: You've always been too nervous to tell Poe how you feel. A night out after the end of the war may change that.

It feels surreal, to put it simply. It’s over. It’s finally over. For years, you’ve known nothing but chaos and panic and uncertainty. But now, you can leave all of it in the past. Palpatine’s gone. The war’s over.

Leaping from your x-wing, you spot Poe across the tarmac. He locks eyes with you, breaking into a huge, beaming grin. You sprint towards him, sporting an equally bright expression. He holds out his arms, and you leap into them. He spins around as you bury your face in his neck, laughing. He sets you down, placing his hands on your upper arms.

“We did it,” he breathes, and you nod in disbelief.

“We did it,” you repeat, still smiling. You’re about to compliment a particular barrel roll he’d pulled off earlier when Finn comes barreling over, wrapping him in a bear hug. You smile, walking away to grab some water and allow Poe some time with his friend.

He watches your retreating form with a faint smile, content with the universe for the first time in years. Finn looks at him with a knowing expression and nudges him with his elbow. Poe snaps his head around, cheeks flushed.

“You should tell her,” he says, and Poe’s eyes widen.

“No way,” he replies, carding a hand through his hair. “What if I fuck everything up?” Finn rolls his eyes.

“Poe, I love you, but you’re the most oblivious man I’ve ever met.” This earns him a shocked expression from the older man, and he laughs. “Trust me. Just tell her.” Poe opens his mouth to object, but loses what he was going to say as Rey walks up and wraps him and Finn in a hug.

You watch as the three embrace, smiling. You’re so proud of Poe your chest could burst. He’d handled that last battle with the grace and strategy you’ve seen in him time and time again. You hear footsteps headed your way and glance up, to find Rose standing next to you.

“Hey,” she says quietly, and you scooch to the left a bit to give her space to sit, patting the bench next to you. “It’s crazy, huh?”

“Yeah,” is all you can manage, but you can tell that she understands the magnitude of emotions contained in your reply. No words could encapsulate the feeling of joy and relief flowing through you.

“I heard Poe did some pretty amazing flying out there.”

You grin, nodding. “He really did. Per the usual, of course.” Smiling, she takes in the look of admiration on your face.

“You like him.” Not a question, just a statement. An observation. You look at her slowly and nod.

“I do,” you say, taking a sip of water from the canteen in your hand.

“He likes you, I think. From what Finn’s told me.” You splutter, choking on your drink.

“What?” you exclaim, face turning red as a tomato as you cough. She laughs loudly, and you shoot her a death glare. “If you’re pulling my leg I swear-”

“I’m not, I promise.”

Narrowing your eyes, you swallow another mouthful of water. “What exactly has Finn told you?”

“He’s caught Poe staring at you too many times to count, that damn idiot never shuts up about you, and once Rey saw him fiddling with his mom’s ring behind his back while talking to you,” she lists, ticking off the instances on her fingers.

“That doesn’t mean he likes me,” you point out, and Rose sighs. Ignoring her, you continue. “He could’ve just been spacing out, we’re friends, so he’s bound to talk about me, and he just has a thing about not being able to sit still. Those are just...normal Poe things.”

“What are?”

You whip your head around, to see him standing right behind you. Of course.

“Nothing,” you reply calmly, glowering at Rose as she tries to contain her laughter. “Just talking about that maneuver you did earlier. Very impressive.” He grins, clapping you on the shoulder.

“Thanks,” he laughs. “Anyways, we’re headed out to celebrate-” he gestures to Finn, Rey, and his squadron. “-would you guys wanna come?”

Rose nods excitedly, and you do the same. “Sounds awesome.”

The music in the bar pounds in your ears. Normally, you hate crowded, public settings like this - they stress you out. However, you decide to make a special exception for tonight. After all, you just saved the fucking galaxy.

Poe, expectedly, makes a beeline for the bar with Jess. They order several rounds of shots and bring the drinks back to the table the rest of you are sitting at. He slides into his spot next to you, his thigh brushing against yours.

“Ok,” he says loudly, so your group can hear him over the clamor of the establishment. “Never have I ever - pretty simple,” he adds when Rey shoots him a look of confusion. “We’ll go around the table. Someone will say something. If you’ve done what they say, you take a shot. Snap, you go first.”

“Ok, uh, never have I ever gone on a supply run hungover,” he replies, grinning. Poe groans, taking a shot. You gasp as Finn does, too.

“No!” you say, aghast.

“It was one time!” he shouts in defense of himself, and Rey chuckles.

“He threw up within the hour,” Rose says, and you snicker. Finn kicks the mechanic under the table.

“Alright, settle down,” Jess says, clearing her throat. She shoots a pointed glance at Karé. “Never have I ever flirted with a superior officer to get a different assignment.” The woman sighs, pouring liquor into her mouth. Blushing, you do the same. Poe gapes at you.

“You’re kidding me.”

“It wasn’t here,” you admit. “Navy stuff.” Snap laughs as he recalls the event you’re talking about. “I was about to get assigned janitorial duty for the seventh week in a row, so I insinuated some very...” you pause, grinning. “inappropriate things to my commander. He put me on guard duty on the bridge instead.”

A strange feeling flares in Poe’s chest as you and the others laugh about how flustered the officer had gotten, and his knuckles turn white as he clenches the table. You discreetly nudge his leg with your knee.

“You okay?” you ask quietly, and any jealousy he’s feeling melts away as he takes in the concern in your eyes.

“Yeah,” he nods. You smile.

“Cool.”

“Okay, okay,” Karé laughs, shooting a death glare at Jess. “Rose. Your turn.” She smiles conspiratorily at Finn, who nods at her, before glancing at you briefly. You send a befuddled look towards Rey, who simply shakes her head, shrugging.

You have a bad feeling about this.

“Never have I ever…” she trails off, scratching her chin animatedly. “Had a crush on a close friend.”

Your stomach drops. Rose giggles as she feels you tense up beside her.

“Fuck you,” you say, throwing back a shot. A barrage of gasps sounds from your friends. “Oh, grow up,” you laugh, and Finn chuckles. You glare at him, and he raises his hands in surrender. Slowly, Poe leans forward, grabs a shot, and knocks it back. You barely constrain your shock.

“Oh my gods WHO?” Karé squeals, clapping her hands together.

“That’s not part of the game,” Poe quips, offering her a smug expression. She turns hopefully to you, and you laugh.

“No way,” you say, shaking your head. She sticks her bottom lip out in a pout, before letting her mouth fall open.

“Is it someone here?” she asks breathlessly. You clear your throat, face heating.

“I’m gonna go get some fresh air,” you murmur, slipping out of the booth. Karé and Jess boo loudly at your excuse, but you just flip them off as you head outside.

A light breeze tangles its fingers in your hair and tugs at your shirt, small ripples moving along the fabric. You take a seat on a nearby bench, bringing your legs up and crossing them over each other. Fiddling with a loose thread on your sleeve, you glance upwards. The sky above is littered with small pinpricks of light, twinkling back at you.

A creaking noise sounds to your right, and you look back, to see the door to the bar open. You watch as Poe walks through it, puffing his top lip out and shoving his hands in his pockets. He glances in your direction. You offer him a small wave, which he returns, making his way over to where you sit.

“May I?” he asks, and you nod, turning your gaze upwards once more. He does the same, laying an arm across the back of the bench.

“I wonder how many of those we’ve flown by,” he wonders aloud, motioning to the countless stars and planets above you.

“Probably lots. We really went all over, huh?” He smiles, nodding. You stand, walking to the gate in front of the bar and leaning on it. Poe follows suit, bracing his forearms behind him as he leans back.

“Look, it’s stupid of me to ask, and you don’t have to answer, but...who was it?” You turn your head toward him, puzzled. He nods to the bar. “The game. That last question.” You scoot closer to him, leaning your head on his shoulder. The familiar gesture makes him smile.

“Eh, you don’t wanna know,” you say, and he chuckles.

“Oh, but I do.” You laugh. There’s a moment of silence (not uncomfortable - it never is with Poe) as you figure out how to word your next statement.

“It’s a bit complicated,” you admit, and he turns his head to look down at you.

“Oh?”

“I really like this person, but I also love how close I am with them right now. I’m worried that if they know, that…” you trail off, worried that voicing your concerns will bring them to fruition.

“That everything will change,” Poe finishes quietly. You swallow nervously. “That you could lose them, and you don’t know-” he takes a deep breath “-you don’t know what you would do if that happened.” You turn to face him as he leans up to stand straight, heart pounding in your chest so loud you swear he can hear it. His eyes flit down to your lips momentarily, and your breath hitches.

“Poe,” you say, barely above a whisper. His eyes lock onto yours, and you bite the inside of your cheek.

You open your mouth to continue, but your words die in your throat as he takes your face in his hands. Your whole body goes rigid, and he notices, starting to pull away. Panicking, you place your hands over his, silently reassuring him that it’s ok. He smiles softly, and your cheeks warm.

“Can I kiss you?” he murmurs, and you nod, heart racing. He brings his mouth down to yours tentatively, nose brushing against yours. You smile against his lips, bringing a hand up and burying it in his curls. He fits his hands to your waist, thumb gently brushing over your side. His lips taste like the tequila you’d both taken shots of in the bar, and it’s sweet on your tongue, reminding you of the nectar from the sapflowers back home on Naboo.

The two of you break apart, hot breaths mingling in the small space between you.

“You have no idea,” he murmurs, smile as bright as a thousand suns, “how long I’ve wanted to do that.” His grin widens as you grow flustered, mouth twisting into a small smile.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner,” you say, eyebrows furrowing together. “I didn’t want to mess everything up, and there just wasn’t a good-”

“Hey,” he says gently, taking your hand. “It’s ok, you have nothing to be sorry for.” You smile.

“I really like you,” you say, and he laughs warmly, bringing a hand to your cheek.

“I really like you, too,” he responds, and you lean into the touch. “We should probably head back in, or they’re gonna think we abandoned ship.”

“Sounds like a plan,” you say.

Nobody says anything if they notice how you and Poe hold hands for the rest of the night, sitting closer than you usually do, talking only to each other.

It seems natural, if anything. Like it’s always been that way. Like it’s how it should be.

taglists (open):

permanent: @staarshines

#poe dameron #poe dameron fic #poe dameron x reader #poe dameron / reader #poe dameron fluff #poe dameron angst #star wars #star wars fic #star wars fluff #star wars angst #poe dameron fanfic #poe dameron fanfiction #poe dameron x you #poe dameron / you #fluff

[buckyownsmylife]

daddy issues - chapter xv

The one where Ransom doesn’t feel ready to become a father, but he should have thought about it before sleeping with a complete stranger.

When Ransom’s latest one night stand lets him know that he’s going to become a father, he finds himself looking for the qualities he never believed to have so he can become the parent he never got to witness as a child.

for general warnings and author’s notes, please go to the fic’s masterlist.

A/N for this chapter: this is 3.2k of unedited drama and I am so fucking proud of it. I wrote this entire thing today, and it’s easily one of the pieces I’m most proud of. So I haven’t been able to fit a proper conversation between the reader and Harlan - I couldn’t make the scene justified if his presence was there, since he does seem to be the one thing that keeps the family on the line - but that means I had some ideas of how I can make up for it in the future! Extra chapter? Perhaps. We are approaching the end though. I only have two more chapter planned for this fic and an epilogue. We’ll see how that goes!

Y/N’s P.O.V.

“Hey!” I got into the car excited to see him again, but I tried to reason with myself that it was all because of his visit to his grandfather’s publishing company, of course. I wanted to know how that went and I was curious as to what Harlan’s plans were, that was mostly it.

The fact that I had genuinely missed the man by my side after spending just four hours away from him had very little to do with it, or so I tried to tell myself. I didn’t know how to deal with depending so much on someone yet.

But I was trying to.

Ransom’s silence alerted me that something was different. I stopped trying to fix myself to look to the side and find him staring out the window, face expressionless and eyes void of any sentiment.

“Ransom, what’s wrong?” Reaching over, I squeezed his thigh to get his attention, and he jerked as if he was genuinely surprise by my presence in the small vehicle. “You look stressed,” I clarified, eyebrows furrowed in worry as I reached over to push away a strand of hair that had fallen out of place.

He just stared at me for a while and still I couldn’t read what he was thinking. Was he mad at me? Had I done something wrong? After what felt like eternity, he sighed, gripping the steering wheel as he looked on his lap and admitted, “I’m gonna have to go to this family dinner on Friday.”

Immediately, I breathed deeply in relief, suddenly realizing just how worried I actually was that his mood had something to do with me. But then I was reminded of the little that Ransom had told me about this family - even that little felt like too much.

I could only imagine the anxiety he was feeling, and my heart ached to soothe him as best as I could. “Do you want me to go with you?” I asked, running my digits over his nape calmly, keeping my voice as soft as possible to help him relax.

Still, his head snapped up so he could meet my eyes, his wide as two saucers as he struggled to process what I’d said. “… You’d do that?” He sounded so surprised, so genuinely shocked by my offer, that I couldn’t stop myself from giggling, taking both of his hands on mine and squeezing them gently.

“Of course I would, honey.” Ransom’s eyes were so soft as they stared into mine, even as my heart doubled its size in its effort to reach out for his, I found myself justifying, “You went with me to see my parents!”

The way his smile dropped at my explanation had me feeling cold and empty, desperate to see him look at me the same way he was doing only seconds ago.

“Besides,” I forced myself to admit it, trying not to sound as breathless as I felt while I opened my heart to him. “I-I don’t want you to go through that alone. I wanna be there for you, like you were for me.”

Immediately, I felt rewarded on my effort to open up by the smile he gave me. “Thank you, baby.” He squeezed my hand this time, and when he leaned over and connected our lips on a quick peck, my heart skipped a beat.

I was in love with this man.

Ransom’s P.O.V.

I sighed as we stood in front of my grandfather’s front door, trying to adjust my sweater that suddenly felt uncomfortable. Beside me, she seemed to be doing the exact same thing, fingers pulling on the end of the dress she was wearing, making me smile.

The dress highlighted her bump - it was now undeniable that she was pregnant and even if I’d never been particularly attracted to women in this stage of life, I couldn’t tear my eyes away from her now.

It was like she shined from within. Her beauty amazed me, and so when she noticed me staring and stopped fiddling with her clothes, straightening herself up to ask, “Do I look okay?” I had to stop myself from laughing.

“Yes.” More than okay. “But are you sure you won’t be cold?” We’d gone through this argument before leaving the house, so I was prepared to see her rolling her eyes as she reached out to take my hand in hers.

“Unless your family has the habit of dining outdoors regardless of the weather, I think we’ll be alright.” I chuckled, rubbing my thumb on the back of her hand, but it sounded nervous even to my own ears. It didn’t surprise me that she noticed it. “Are you ready?” She questioned, voice in that soothing tone she used whenever she noticed my stress.

“Not at all,” I admitted, but in all honesty, the prospect of joining my family for dinner didn’t seem as bad as it usually did. Not with her by my side.

“I’m here for you.” Hearing her say those words meant more to me than I was able to properly express at that moment so I just stared at her, taking in the fact that this incredible person actually cared about me.

“Just… don’t leave me alone, okay?” Her immediate nod had me smiling. It prompted me to once again lean over and connect our lips, only this time, when I tried to pull away, she kept me close with her hand on the back of my neck.

Who knows where this kiss might have led us if the door hadn’t open right at that moment, revealing my lousy uncle who stared from me to her with wide eyes?

“… She’s pregnant? With your baby?” A groan was all I could muster as a response, tugging her into the house with me. “When were you going to tell your family?”

“For fuck’s sake,” I cursed, looking around the living room for the bar. “Where’s the goddamn alcohol?” There was no way I’d be able to survive this night without it, as much as I wanted to be supportive of Y/N.

“I think that’s a bottle of scotch,” I heard her whispering next to me, pointing towards a corner of the room, and I sighed in relief at her understanding.

“Thanks, sweetheart.”

Y/N’s P.O.V.

An hour into the evening and I had already understood why Ransom was the way that he was - and why he liked his grandfather so much, despite how he felt about the rest of the family.

Harlan was gentle where all of his children were… prickly. In fact, he was the only one who addressed me at all, but I found myself feeling grateful for it, since when the dinner actually started, I wanted the rest of the family to forget about me completely.

“I am so sorry,” Harlan apologized, rubbing his hands nervously as he stared at the rest of the family who was walking towards the dining room. “I sleep early, everyone knows that, but this is the only time they could all gather and since they didn’t know you were coming…”

I waved away his apologies, offering him a hug as I wished him good night. “Just as long as you’ve had your dinner, Harlan. Thanks for welcoming me into your home.”

He accepted my embrace easily, taking advantage of the proximity to whisper in my ear, “Just hang on to him, dear. I promise it’ll be worth it.” I smiled when we parted, nodding in confirmation to his words.

“It already is,” I assured him, but he only sighed.

“Make sure to remember that during dinner…” Now I understood why. It started with a simple question, one of the maids offered me some meat, and when I hesitated to answer…

“God, are you daft, girl? Have you never eaten lamb?” My eyes widened in surprise, but before Ransom could have the chance to throw himself at his mother, I just squeezed his thigh.

“I was going to ask her if there was any oregano in the sauce. It’s been making me feel sick.” I didn’t need to add why - the reminder of my situation, of what led me to be there with them in this dining room was very clear in me.

And still, that didn’t stop them.

“That’s a pretty necklace…” Ransom’s father commented before we could even grab a bite. I chuckled to myself, immediately catching onto what he wasn’t saying.

“Thanks, I got it at a little boutique back home. It was a gift for myself after I got my first paycheck.” I could feel Ransom’s gaze on me, the waves of pride rolling from him in waves. It made me smile, but it was just the calm before the storm.

“Ransom, have you contacted a lawyer?”  This question came from his uncle’s wife, Donna - I think that’s what she was called. Not that she tried to introduce herself to me or anything, but Harlan made sure I knew everyone’s name as soon as I stepped inside the house.

“Why?” Ransom’s tone was vicious and his squinted eyes alerted everyone that he was prepared for a strike, but the fact that he still hadn’t anticipated what was coming almost made me laugh.

Even Donna herself hesitated, unbelieving that he was going to make her say it. “There’s no way you’re that stupid.” And just like that, the doors to hell were opened up.

Ransom’s P.O.V.

I couldn’t believe what I was hearing, but then again, was I really surprised?

“You should make sure to draw a prenup,” Donna insisted, while the rest of the family pretended not to hear, undoubtedly coming up with their own ways to insult Y/N. “Something that will assure only your kid has access to your money.”

I could hear Y/N quietly laughing to herself next to me, but while she was able to find the irony in the situation amusing, all I felt was blinding rage.

“God, do you even hear the shit you say? I never asked for your input, this, right here, is precisely why I didn’t tell any of you all about my baby.” I saw Y/N flinch from the corner of my eyes before I heard my mother’s fork drop against the precious porcelain dish she was pretending to eat from. I knew this was the sorest topic of discussion for her. I knew this was why she had been pretending Y/N wasn’t even there, hadn’t even been invited to dinner with me.

“Fair enough,” she spoke, lying back against her chair as she finally raised her eyes to meet mine. “I don’t know if we even should learn anything about this child, considering it most likely isn’t even yours.”

It was like someone had thrown a bucket of ice over me. Y/N was oddly quiet now, seemingly as frozen as me - and when I realized that, my anger returned with twice its power.

“Watch your fucking mouth,” I warned, just as my mother retorted, “Don’t you talk like that to me.” I didn’t even have the chance to talk back when she stroke again. “You fuck so many ransom desperate chicks, I’m surprised this is the first you knocked up.”

This was as insulting to her as it was to me, and it also struck a chord in me because of how I feared this was just reinforcing Y/N’s views of me. “Don’t say shit like that,” I threatened, to no avail. “Don’t talk about her like that.”

“Ransom…” Her sweet voice tried to intervene, but I was too far gone to hold myself back now. I couldn’t stand the thought that I was hurting her because I was the reason she was here in the first place.

“You know nothing about her, and yet you feel comfortable judging her,” I continued, ignoring her completely. “She’s a lawyer, actually. You would know it if you had even bothered to talk to her. If there was ever the need for a prenup, I’d have her draw it.”

Maybe they thought I’d stop at that - I thought so myself, until I realized there was still so much I wanted to get out, and I was going to do that now.

“And you know what? I trust her more than I trust you, and I came out of you. So maybe you should consider that before you attack the one person I try to introduce to my family.” I hated everything about this. I hated how they still managed to get to me, how the fact that my own mother, who I didn’t even respect, still managed to make me feel inadequate about the one thing in my life that made me excited.

I knew I’d always lose with them. They just had this way of inciting the beast in me - they brought out the worst in me, and I felt helpless to fight it.

“Okay, so she’s not some random skank,” my uncle oh-so-helplessly interrupted, immediately making me want to punch him in his stupid face. “But this just means she’s the one playing you.”

“Oh, shut up!” I threw my hands up, pushing my chair away from the table, fully intended to storm out of the room until Meg was the one who stopped me dead in my tracks.

“Did you even get a paternity test, Ransom?” She seemed almost uncomfortable to voice it, eyes darting from me to Y/N, but I could read her apologetic smile perfectly.

She just didn’t want someone else to get Harlan’s attention and interest because that would potentially mean less money to each and everyone of the people in this room, as he’d add one more person to his aid list.

My father took advantage of what Meg said, waving in her direction. “Don’t you know how important this family is? How quickly she could rise in any job because of a connection to us?”

My mother scoffed, finally ready to interfere again. “Knowing she’s actually smart leaves me even more surprised that you’ve relented and decided to become someone’s little plaything until this baby pops out. I’m assuming a few months with a screaming kid and you’re just gonna abandon her anyway. Which is fine by me, I won’t have to pretend to be a grandmother for long.”

Y/N’s P.O.V.

All I could think was how grateful I was that I had accompanied him to this dinner tonight. As I watched his chest heaving with fury, I could not imagine how he would have felt having to deal with all of this on his own.

“Ransom,” I tried to catch his attention, pulling him back to his seat. “Ransom, it’s okay,” I tried to appease him, but he was too fucking gone to care.

“No, it’s not okay, he pushed my hand away, getting up from his chair to lean over the table, both hands on top of it as he stared at his mother.  “What the fuck is wrong with you?” He yelled, making me flinch, although Linda hardly seemed bothered by it.

Then, much to my surprise, Ransom straightened up, running a hand through his hair as an emotionless chuckle escaped him. “No, you know what? You’re right. You’re not gonna be a grandmother. I’m gonna be a father, Harlan’s gonna be a great-grandfather, but that’s it. I’m not gonna keep taking your shit anymore, Linda, you know why? Even if this child wasn’t mine, I’d still want her and this kid.”

My heartbeat pumped out of control as he continued, “She’s not just someone who’s carrying my child. I care about her. And if you can’t respect her, than I guess I was right in keeping this pregnancy from you.”

I held my breath as Ransom apparently caught his, my head swirling with the different emotions running through me - my infatuation for this man, who had so fiercely defended me from his entire family, the adrenaline from witnessing such a vicious argument.

I truly believed this would be the end of it. I didn’t know where they could go from here - that was, of course, until Linda decided to attack him.

“Oh, and you think you’re going to be so great with it?” My blood boiled when her words turned against her own son so easily. Attack me and my dignity? That was okay, these people didn’t know me.

But seeing her attack Ransom was just too much for me.

“Do you think she’ll want to keep you around once she realizes she’ll be raising two children with you to weigh her down?” Ransom visibly faltered, like she had slapped him, and that’s when I had enough. “You’ll never be able to give her the emotional support that she needs and you know that.”

I rose to my feet at that, holding onto my lower back as I softly slapped Ransom’s back in an attempt to calm him down. “I got this, babe.” He was so surprised - and still so hurt by his mother’s statements - that he didn’t even try to stop me. In fact, I think he didn’t even realize what was going on until I turned to Linda and started talking.

“Do you really think that poorly of your son that you can’t believe he has anything to offer in a relationship?” Now she was the one who looked up at me with an expression that looked like I had physically hurt her.

“Is it that unbelievable to you, that someone would be able to like him for him?” She didn’t seem to be able to find anything to answer to me, and when I turned to Richard, I was also met with silence.

Ransom’s P.O.V.

“Well, I do,” she announced, like it was the single most obvious thing, the simplest fact to deduce in the world, while I stood back watching her with my mouth hanging open. “I like him enough to be willing to open up to him even if one day he might leave me because to me, he is worth any possibility of future pain.”

I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. I’d never had anyone defend me like this, not even Harlan - not even my parents, when I was a kid and the bigger children decided to bully me.

No, back then all I got was a talk about how “real men don’t cry” and if my father ever caught me cowering from someone else again he’d give me a real reason to be afraid.

“And I do say possibility,” she continued, not having raised her voice for even a second and still to effortlessly able to catch the attention of everyone in the room, assure herself the ground to speak her mind without the fear of interruptions. “Because Ransom’s actions have never given me any reason to think that outcome is even remotely probable.”

“So maybe you think about your own opinions of your son’s character and see if they don’t reflect your own more than they reflect his actions.” She turned around after that, tiny hand encircling my wrist as she began to yank me in the direction of the front door.

“Let’s go.”

#ransom drysdale x reader #ransom drysdale reader #my series #ransom drysdale reader insert #ransom drysdale reader inserts #ransom drysdale fanfiction #ransom drysdale series #ransom drysdale writings

[niskoo]

Memories kept in the pink hoodie

pairing: Ex! Heeseung x reader

genre: angst, fluff in the end ig, breakup! AU

warnings: swearing, uhhh they like break down together

word count: 2.2k words OMG

a/n: another one of my requests!! thank you all for the ideas its really helping!! mmm this one was very interesting to write because i usually write crack/fluff, aaannndd ive literally never done anything ive written IURHWIU thank you for the great idea anon <33 THIS HELPED SO MUCH OMG USUALLY MY ANGST SUCKS BUT IM PRETTY PROUD OF THIS AAAA ALSO IM SORRY IF THIS WASNT REALLY WHAT YOU WANTED IDK THERE ALWAYS HAS TO BE FLUFF IN MY IMAGINES IG 😓😭

feel free to request and help get rid of my writers block!!

a bit based off of 'try again' by jaehyun and d.ear

You should've known the consequences of dating an idol, you should've been careful. Of course they wouldn't let you be together, he's in one of the rising groups, heck, he was in one of the biggest companies.

It wasn't necessarily the company's fault you were so heartbroken, it's both your faults. You couldn't help but blame each other for how careless you were. You know better than to make things worse, and yet you did.

The evening you go back to his dorm after being confronted by the company, you two started a huge argument of who's fault it was. Either it was his fault for not taking caution during work, or your fault for always checking up on him. All loving actions in the past became reasons for why you should break up, thus cracking your relationship further.

When you went home that night, with your backpack full of your things, you did nothing. You didn't cry, you didn't rage, you simply thought that this was the end, you felt guilty that it had to end like this, instead of just working it out and breaking it off peacefully.

Your heart was left cracked and hurt for sure, but this time, you blame yourself. You shouldn't have met him, you shouldn't have got to know him, it's all your fault. And for the first time that night, you cry.

Your heart clenched at every thought of having to leave Heeseung, more tears falling at the fact that he's not gonna be a part of your life anymore. He's gone, and it's all your fault.

It's when you unpack your things when you realize you still have a bunch of things left at his place, you realize you never want to go back and face him.

You leave your stuff there for the next 2 days, your heart still unready to confront and be reminded of the fact that Heeseung is gone. Unfortunately, he has other plans.

Your phone lights up, and the last name you want to see is lighting the phone up.

'Hey... you left some of your stuff.'

You instantly turn your phone off, breaths picking up as you quickly look away from it and finish your lunch. You can feel the anxiety filling your body as you notice it light up once again, and it swarms in your chest even more when your mother winces at the next text.

You put down your spoon, quickly glancing at the text.

'If you want, you can come by and pick them up? I'll pack them for you...'

Your heart clenches yet once again, you know it's true, literally half your stuff is still there and you have to pick them up. You unlock your phone, quickly sending an 'okay' before completely shutting your phone down. You wouldn't stand a second more looking at his contact.

You decide to go at 11, because that's when the other members are at the company training. You don't know if Heeseung's gonna be there to give you your things, a part of you hopes he is, another hopes he's not there. But then again, who else would open the door for you?

You stand outside the familiar door nervously, picking on your nails and the lint on the hem of your cardigan. Just as you were about to knock, the door swung open, and instead of your ex boyfriend standing there it's the youngest of the group, his eyes wide and puffy lips parted.

As usual, he woke up late. You can't help but chuckle as he picks his shoes up and scurries down the stairs, bidding him a friendly goodbye.

You almost forget about Heeseung, but as you hear shuffling from inside, it all comes back.

You two share awkward glances, the tension slowly building itself back up. Instead of the heated, rage filled tension, this time the tension is guilty, and without each other knowing, yearning.

“T-this way,” Heeseung mutters tightly, eyes glued to the ground as he shuffled quickly to the living room. You follow along just a few seconds later, still processing the fact that this is the end. He could be gone out of your life after this, it’s your last chance to speak.

Your eyes slowly travel up when you stop, the beating of your heart quickening with the slight burning in your eyes. Lo and behold, there your things laid, ready for you to bring back home. You can’t help but notice how it’s packed completely how Heeseung would pack, neat and with care. It’s not too stuffed, it’s in the perfect place.

Biting at the dead skin of your lip, you trudge towards the duffle bag—his duffle bag—and kneel down to grab the handle. The moment you pick it up, you notice how the bag isn’t fully zipped, and a certain pink sleeve peaks out from the tiny space.

All too familiar, the pink sleeve was. It was the one he took from Daniel in I-land. He knew you loved it, for you loved the kid like your little brother. But, he can’t. It’s his, it’s his favorite, he can’t just give it to his ex.

You instantly place the bag down, the tears starting to well up in frustration and sadness. You zip open the bag and take the pink hoodie out, before shoving it into Heeseung’s chest, “Take it, Heeseung, Please don’t give it to me.”

It takes him a few moments, before Heeseung is shaking his head and handing it back to you. “No, it’s practically yours anyway. And you really like it right? It’s just a-“

“Don’t tell me it’s just a hoodie!”

You both are shocked at your sudden burst, frozen in your spot. Your breathing is heavy, like a weight is holding it down and slowing your breathing. There are tears keeping your cheek moist, warm, they stream down continuously, the sensation as if there was fire dripping from your eyes and burning your skin.

Heeseung’s just on the verge of crying himself, the grip on the pink hoodie deathly, he feels the material ripping against his skin. How did it come to this? When did it even happen? It all feels surreal, to think what you two had could fall apart.

All the happy moments in your relationship fading to memories, the hoodie representing the fact itself is true. None of you wanted to take it, afraid it would remind you of the other.

Deep down, you wanted to keep it, keep the memories it held, keep the tears that once soaked it when you vented all your stress to him, keep the scent of Heeseung that lingered on the fabric. You were just too afraid of being reminded that along with the happy memories, came the sad memories of the night you fought and broke it off.

Your grip on the poor hoodie eases, as you slide to the floor helplessly with tears messing your face up. You desperately wanted to hold the pink piece of clothing and keep it forever, and another part of you cursed at you for being too vulnerable.

Your hand quickly wipes away the tears on your cheeks and chin harshly, almost hitting yourself for being so sensitive. Before you could do the action again, a softer grasp is stopping your hand, Heeseung’s other hand reaching up to brush the tears away dearly, blowing your hair away from your face.

Before you could even bring yourself to stop, you’re already reacting to his touch, cowering into his hold and placing your hand over his on your cheek, almost intertwining them together.

“I’m sorry,” you whisper into his palm, your other hand reaching up to grasp at his t-shirt. You’re sorry for so many reasons, for not being careful, for all the things you said in the argument, for making a sudden commotion just because of a stupid hoodie. “I’m so sorry...”

“Shh, it’s alright, it’s alright.” Heeseung grabs you into his infamous embrace you would hate to leave, stroking your back with patterns just the way he knew you loved, just the way it would calm you down. “We’ll be alright.”

More tears fall between your eyelashes, dripping and soaking into Heeseung’s shoulder as he himself sniffles quietly into your hair. None of you want to leave each other behind, it’s the painful truth that you both can’t have, the truth you’ve always feared.

A sudden feeling of relief fills you up inside, his words reassure you in a way, we’ll be alright, you’ll be okay, it just had to leave his lips for you to believe it. You crawl closer to Heeseung, squeezing yourself in his bear hug, “We’ll be okay, we can make it right,”

A hoarse and hearty laugh leaves Heeseung, it shakes right by your ear as you press it against his chest, and he nods, “Yeah,”

He gently pulls your head back right in front of his, wiping the last of your tears and tucking the stray hairs back to the back of your ear, “Let’s just talk,” his whisper tickles your nose, causing you to lightly giggle at the feeling, his lips pressing softly against the pink tinted skin, “Make everything better?”

You nod, finally grasping at the pink hoodie and holding it tight to your chest as Heeseung laughs and bonks his forehead right on yours.

For the next few hours, you talk, make up, talk some more, maybe even a small cuddle, but that’s a secret. You make ramen for when the other members come back from practice, you feel happy to see the members thank you and eat with enthusiasm, you feel glad this is how your last moments together last.

Now you have the (practically ripped) pink hoodie in your arms as you bid the boys goodbye, slightly tearing up at the sight of them sadly waving, but you keep it in and continue your way back home, where you would tell your mom how you ended it on good terms.

And that night, you slip on the pink hoodie before you sleep, and you feel a piece of paper poking at your arm. You’re surprised to see a crumpled envelope poking out, your name written messily in blue ink.

You pull the envelope out quickly, opening it out with something bubbling in the pit of your stomach as you notice the handwriting as Heeseung’s.

‘My dear Y/n,

Hello there! I don’t know if i got the guts to make it right with you or if i pussied out and watched you as you drove away with regrets, but that’s what this letter is for. hopefully you didn’t throw this letter away hehe

i just wanted to thank you. for everything. your love, your care, your trust, Your happiness, thank you for everything you’ve given me. im sorry we had to end our journey, but know that you’ll be in my mind everyday. when we practice, I’ll remember your encouraging smile, when we win, I'll remember the fact that it’s you who gave me the courage to start this whole career.

i love you y/n. we’ll both probably find our other person in the future, but you’ll forever be in my heart as my first love, my first heartbreak, my best memory. thank you for helping me through my hardest times, thank you for helping the other boys through their worst times, especially jungwon, he’ll miss you the most.

i guess this is goodbye, y/n. not forever, of course, but for some time. thank you for everything, i hope you enjoyed the times we had together as much as i did.

with all the love in my heart,

Lee Heeseung :)’

You wipe at your tears for the nth time that day, folding the paper back into the envelope. “Fuck you Heeseung, you’ve ruined my makeup again!” You curse under your breath as you slip the letter into a certain box at the corner of your bedside table, patting your cheeks one last time.

You truly cherish the memories you had with Heeseung. You hope he does too.

#ehypen #enhypen imagines #enhypen angst #enhypen fluff #enhypen blurbs #enhypen drabbles #enhypen x reader #enhypen scenarios #enhypen heeseung #lee heeseung #lee heeseung angst #lee heeseung fluff #lee heeseung blurbs #lee heeseung x reader #lee heeseung scenarios

[messrmoonyy]

number 3 from the physical touch list (hiding face in neck) for remadora please :)) (no pressure)

Not me neglecting previous prompts/requests because this one the one I got motivation for.

Prompt from this list.

I used this to do my spin on the aftermath of the Battle of the Seven Potters, Cause I like anxious overprotective Remus🙃😗✌🏻( I also changed like. The entire dialogue from the original scenes because why not ). Think battle of seven potters but add a little ✨spice and drama✨. I went off on a total tangent on this tbh. As I do with every prompt it seems. Anyway. Hope you like it my dear anon.

Pairing: Remus lupin x Nymphadora Tonks

Warnings: none

Check my masterlist for all my other writing!

She was late. Incredibly so. Her and Ron should have been one of the first pairs to arrive at The Burrow, he’d arranged for her to have one of the shortest routes. He’d not told her that of course but he was quite sure she’d known he’d gotten a little too tetchy and secretly spoken to Alastor. But he had a right to be over protective didn’t he? This was was his wife. The woman he had literally, and in every sense of the word, sworn his life to. Sworn his dying breath to protect her, care for her.

Yet he’d let her put herself in danger. He could have tried to persuade Alastor to let him and George go the same route as Dora and Ron, or at least in the similar direction. He knew he had to be focussed on the war effort, knew he had a duty to protect the children. But… he also had a duty to protect her. His wife. His Dora. And now for all he knew Bellatrix could have struck her down, her body lying lifeless in a field somewhere.

He wasn’t a particular calm man at the best of times, his stress had its own stress, but he had never felt worse than he did in that moment. He’d already practically attacked Harry, was in no way of any comfort to George and Molly. Or anyone else.

So he was waiting out of the way by the window, constantly looking up at the sky through the glass and waiting for her to materialise through the burrows guards, come skidding over and laugh at him for being anxious over nothing. But the sky remained clear of her vibrant hair and her joyful laugh. The stars practically mocking him as he waited.

“ she’s a tough one. She’ll be okay “ Kingsley had appeared at his side “ Bill and Fleur, Ron and Tonks. They’ll all be here soon. Stop fretting Remus “ Remus almost laughed at the sheer stupidity of telling him not to fret over her. As if he ever did anything else. He always worried for her safety, had done long before they had even become a couple. Waiting up for her to come home from late shifts at the ministry in the days she’d stay at Grimmauld, worrying about her when she’d turn up with a new bruise or gash from something. Marrying her had simply made him fret more.

He’d never felt so protective of anyone in his life, never thinking he ever would either. Yet here he was, constantly putting her first and wanting to do nothing but take care of her. She never left his mind, was his first priority forever and always. He didn’t even want to think about what he’d do if he ever lost her, if he ever failed to protect her.

“ Bill and Fleur were scheduled to arrive as one of the last. Dora and Ron should have been one of the first pairs here “ he said it slightly more harshly than intended and turned to apologise to his friend immediately after, but as he did there was the sound of something passing through the guards outside.

Remus charged outside, almost tripping over his own gangly limbs as he went. He froze to the spot in a mixture of shock and relief as Doras broom appeared in the sky, the bristles smoking and charred as she made an unsteady decent to the ground. She landed in a long skid,stumbling from the broom and directly into Remus’ arms. She practically fell into him and would have knocked him to the floor if he hadn’t been stiff as a board.

“ Remus “ she gasped, hugging him so tightly it took the air from his lungs. But he didn’t even care, he’d give his last breath if it meant dying with her there in his arms. Because she was alright. She was right. There “ was so worried about you. The death eaters and- fuck I know you’re really no good on a broom and you bloody hate flying at the best of times. Merlins balls I was so scared “ she rambled so fast Remus barely understood what she was saying to him.

His hand slipped into her hair in some attempt to hold her as close as he could, still trying to accept that she was really there. Safe. Alive. He had worried for nothing of course. He should have known. She was tough. So much tougher than he gave her credit for it seemed.

He gently pried her out of his grip slightly, needing to see her face just to make sure it really was her. That he wasn’t dreaming it.

“ where were you “ as had most of his words that evening, it came out a little harsh but she didn’t seem to care. She reached up to cup his face in a soothing manner that was the complete opposite of his previous words to her.

“ Bellatrix. Wants me dead just about as much as Voldy wants Harry. Missed our port key. But I’m fine. Ron’s fine. We’re fine. You’re fine? “ he could feel tears welling in his eyes and he felt a bit stupid, but he couldn’t help it. Words failed him and he simply just nodded and pulled her back into his arms “ fucking deatheaters “ she grumbled.

He pressed his face into the crook of her neck, breathing in her scent and letting it calm him. She smelt like the fresh air, her hair all wind tousled and the slightest hint of smoke. Probably from her charred broom. Her hand rubbed gentle circles into his back and it made him feel… small. Which was funny with how much smaller she actually was compared to him.

“ sweetheart… I’m fine “ she said softly, clearly reading his fear still evident on him “ Remus “

He lifted his head as her hand patted him lightly, but he couldn’t bare to part from her again just yet and his forehead dropped to hers.

“ I’m afraid I underestimated you once again, darling. I knew deep down you’d make it back to me, I’m getting far too old to be worrying like this “ he said with a hint of a smile.

“ oh don’t worry, you won’t get rid of me that easily. Take more than a few of old Voldys mental lackeys to take me out. You’re stuck with me now. Im going no where “ their faces were so close he could feel her cheeks shift as she smiled with her words. Her nose brushed against his before she pressed a kiss to his lips. He usually was rather strict on his avoidance of showing affection to his wife in front of well… anyone really. But he happily kissed her back, even if he did cut it off a little shorter than he truly wanted. Still wondering at the back of his mind if any of the order were secretly judging him. It’d never escape him no matter how hard he tried not to care about it.

As they pulled apart she then only seemed to notice that there was blood on his hands and his jacket. She took a step back, her hands suddenly searching for an injury.

" blood? Remus? " her hands were frantic as she yanked at his collar, pushed up his sleeves, searching for anywhere she could find an injury. He grabbed ahold of her hands and shook her slightly so that she would look at him, it was clearly her time to fret and not his.

" Dora. Dora relax. It's not mine. It's not my blood. George was hit.. don't worry he's alive. He's lost an ear but he's okay. So am I. Not my blood love, it's not mine " she couldn't seem to help herself then and dived for lips again, holding his face in her hands and kissing him harder than before. He still couldn’t help but be a little reluctant but kissed her back, his embarrassment of kissing her in front of others not mattering when they were both just thankful to be alive and with each other.

" I'm just so happy you're alive " she whispered when she pulled back, resting her forehead to his. He opened his mouth to say something else but suddenly she was yanked out of Remus' embrace and shoved away, her clumsy legs stumbling in the gravel and she fell quite ungraciously onto her ass with a grunt of pain. Remus immediately rushed to her side in confusion.

" what the fuck! " she shouted and Remus looked up to see that Kingsley had been the one to pull her away, his wand now pointed at her face.

" Kingsley! Lower your wand! " Remus immediately jumped to her defence, crouching beside her and placing a hand to her shoulder  " Dora are you okay? Dora? "

" someone betrayed us we have to check everyone. You didn't even confirm her identity Lupin, she could have killed you. Look I didn’t mean to knock you down- we have to be certain you understand? "

" are you bloody mental?! " Dora yelled again, rubbing at her elbow that she’d clearly hurt on the way down.

" Kingsley... lower your wand she got Ron back safetly it's quite clearly- "

" we have to check " Kingsley said cutting off Molly, who had come outside with the commotion. Remus helped her back to her feet and then grabbed her hand, stepping in between her and kingsleys raised wand.

" lower. Your. wand. " his voice was commanding as he could muster, Kingsley was his friend. But Dora was his wife. And she came first. And he would put himself between her and a raised wand any and every time. No matter who was on the other end of it.

" Nymphadora Tonks gave me a present for my birthday last year. What was it?" Kingsley asked, ignoring Remus entirely, his wand still pointed at her as she was half hid behind Remus’ body.

" this is ridiculous! We're all turning on each other now? "

" answer the question " Kingsley ignored Remus again, which only made his blood boil more. He was already on edge that evening with the fear of losing his wife. This wasn’t helping to lower his stress levels.

" I know my own damned wife- "

" what was it! " Remus drew his own wand then at the increase in Kingsleys anger, pointing it in Kingsleys direction.

" Remus! "

" lower. Your wand. And step away from my wife " he demanded, not wanting to hurt Kingsley… but willing to if he had to.

" you don't even know if that is your wife"

" please! Stop the both of you! " Molly shouted.

" fucking hell " Dora said and held onto Remus hand harder, stepping better into view " I gave you a new set of quills because I charmed your last lot to throw them self out the window whenever you touched them. Happy? " Kingsley was quiet for a moment longer " now drop your wands. Both of you " Kingsley looked to Remus before finally lowering his wand. But Remus couldn’t. He felt betrayed almost, that someone he thought as a friend would do something like threaten the woman he loved.

Dora pressed gently on Remus' wrist to make him too lower his wand when he didn’t do it if his accord immediately " Remus. Lower your wand...Remus “

" this is exactly what Voldemort would want. To see us all turning on each other. We cannot let ourselves get paranoid like this " Remus said bitterly, wrapping an arm around his wife protectively and finally dropping his wand arm. He knew that Kingsley has been right to check in a way. He had needed to check. Though there were much better ways to go about it rather than pointing a wand at her head. To hold a wand to a witch or wizard was one of the most disrespectful things you could do.

" someone betrayed us "

" Dora and I are never out of each other's sight long enough for anyone to have made a switch or have her as their spy. And you know that. How dare you hold a wand to her head. How dare you " Remus was itching for an argument. And Dora could sense it, also so incredibly good at reading his emotions and thoughts before even he was.

" Remus " she said softly, lifting a hand to gently turn his face to look at her instead of glaring at Kingsley " Remus look at me " she ran her hand gently through his hair and he instantly seemed to relax. His own muscles losing tension without his consent at her touch. She had a knack at being one of the only people to get him to the calm down in almost an instant. Sirius and James had been the only other people he knew that could " relax. It's okay " she transported them into their own little bubble. As if the others were no longer in the burrow too and she kept him there, gently rubbing at his hand until his first unclenched and angry breaths returned to normal.

#messrmoonyy writes #enjoy! I loved writing this #god I’m just churning them out rn arent i? pat on the back to me #remus lupin #nymphadora tonks #remadora #harry potter #remus x tonks #ronks #the marauders #lupin #tonks x lupin #tonks #remadora one shot #remadora fanfic

[lifesanssin]

11 of kisses, Koda, they/them pronouns please

Kisses #11: welcome home kisses Characters: Koda (Horrortale Sans); Sequoia (Horrortale Papyrus)

Read On AO3 🔗 https://archiveofourown.org/works/38320651/chapters/95755360

It was today. Koda knew. He was certain, had checked his notebook, the shared calendar app he had with his brother, and the pinned message you'd sent him two days ago.

Today was the day you were coming home.

He'd had difficulty sleeping since you'd been gone, but he had even more trouble than usual the night before. His mind was too busy, caught in-between what-ifs and all the other, stupid little hypotheticals that had his metaphorical blood run cold. Koda hit the little button in the side of his phone to illuminate the lockscreen, the time clearly on display top and center. A few taps of his thumb, and he'd unlocked the device and was scrolling through the last twelve hours or so of messages.

Messages reassuring him that you'd be home soon. That you missed him so much, and loved him even more so. That your train back was supposed to come in at 3pm, and he'd said he would be there to welcome you.

And that was… it was fine, good even! But he couldn't help the soft groan of frustration when he realized he still had roughly seven hours before their train would arrive, and that was only if it was on time. And for all the patience he held within him, it seemed that none of it was available for this. Even Sequoia had noticed, and he'd been quick to ban Koda from the kitchen.

It wasn't really his fault he started stress-eating the dry pasta again.

So here he sat, hunched on the large sectional across from the television with a bowl of cheez-its in his lap, already half empty, definitely *not sulking*. But, even if he was, its not like Sequoia could blame him. Part of his family was away, and he couldn't see them, or reach out to feel them, or hear them from right beside him… Okay. Maybe there was a little sulking.

The sound of the front door had his skull perking up, and he'd just managed to turn to see who it was when he saw *you* there, your bag slung over your shoulder. His eye light dilated and softened,his soul *yearning*, and… well, his brother's squawk of irritation as Koda knocked over the couch went mostly unheard. You reached for him, but even if you hadn't he was still strongly inclined to scoop you up into his arms, anyway. One arm tucked under your butt, he held you up with ease and used his other hand to guide you closer, until he could press his teeth to your lips in a kiss. Relief and happiness were palpable, both in the kiss and from his soul; the loud, steady purr that started up within his ribcage was also rather impossible to ignore, the force of it a soothing rumble against your body.

By the time he pulled away, you were more than a little breathless, and you dove in for another sweet kiss that had your giant skeletal love whining.

His free hand pawed at your back through your jacket as he circled the couch, and you were quick to shrug out of it, letting it and your bag drop to the floor. When he sat on the couch again (that Sequoia must have righted during your smooching), you were settled in his lap, facing him, and you leaned to press your chest firmly to his.

Large skeletal hands pet over your sides and back, combing through your hair, and you broke the kiss to instead rub your cheek against his in a nuzzle.

"welcome home…"

The deep, raspy bass of his voice was sweetened by his incessant purrs, and you smiled before sliding your arms around his neck in an equally relieved and tender embrace.

"Mmhm… I'm glad to be home."

You didn't state out loud that the 'home' you were talking about really had nothing to do with the house, but something in the way he clung to you, nuzzling into the crook of your neck with a shaky sigh, told you that he understood.

Because, just like he was the home you always longed for, you were the home he never wanted to leave.

And here, now, wrapped up in one another and the feel of his soul so close to yours, you knew that everything was okay.

My AO3 🔗 https://archiveofourown.org/users/Life_sans_Sin Buy me a Dr. Pepper 🔗 https://ko-fi.com/lifesanssin Commission Me 🔗 https://ko-fi.com/lifesanssin/commissions

#fanfiction #undertale au #horrortale #writing prompts #ask game #ask meme #asks #anxietea and cookies #koda #ht!sans #horrortale sans #reader insert #brit•fic

[mypoisonedvine]

Rainstorm (Bucky Barnes x Reader)

credit goes to @princess-of-riviaa for this idea although I think I took it in a slightly different direction than she intended… I hope she won’t mind ;)

this isn’t a “dark fic” in the traditional sense because Bucky himself isn’t very bad (he’s in Winter Soldier mode so he’s no saint, but he’s not a sadist either, just kinda morally ambiguous) but the situation and topics are pretty dark so be wary.  

Summary: the Winter Soldier has basic biological needs.  HYDRA has hypotheses about the hereditary capabilities of super soldier serum.  You’ve been brainwashed into believing that these two goals are your life’s purpose, and that nothing would make you happier than to be at the mercy of HYDRA’s favorite weapon.

Word Count: 4.3k

Warnings: kind of non con* (see below), somewhat painful loss of virginity, mention of blood, captivity and grooming and general HYDRA nastiness

*This is certainly non con because the reader has been brainwashed to comply to orders, but it has none of the trappings of traditional non con fare for the exact same reason.  She’s not gonna resist and she doesn’t want to, it’s just that she lacks, on a greater level, much of a choice.

The scientist made a final adjustment to your hair, putting every curl exactly in its place.  He examined your face before nodding proudly.  “You’re ready.  Let’s go to his room.”

You tried to contain your thrill, following the scientist closely and listening to the echo of your heels on the concrete floor.

The scientist used his fingerprint to unlock the soldier’s door, and as it slid away, you finally saw him in person for the first time.  He was standing in wait, and turned to look at you through the doorway.  Your heart skipped a beat, properly; you were excited to see him, and yet so terrified.  You had been training for months for this exact moment.  There was so much riding on this, and you found yourself afraid that he would be disappointed.

“I have someone here we’d like you to meet,” the scientist informed the soldier.  As you stepped inside, he looked at you with a hint of confusion.  “We understand that you’ve been stressed.  She’s here to help with that.”

The soldier furrowed his brow.  “A woman,” he observed.  He hadn’t seen one in quite some time, at least not this up close.

“This woman represents a lot of money, and time, and research.  She’s not as strong as you, so be careful, but what she lacks in agility she makes up for in obedience.  I promise you, it knows no bounds.”

“She’ll do anything I say,” he realized-- or maybe it was a question.

“She’s eager to please,” the scientist smiled, “and she lives to serve.”

The soldier placed a finger under your chin and you jumped a little before allowing him to move your head side to side as he examined you.

“Is she not to your liking?” the scientist asked nervously.  “We can make some changes.  The hair and outfit can be different.  We figured you would want a… domestic look.”

You tugged at the bottom of your dress, suddenly feeling uncomfortable under your soldier’s observation.  

“No, she’s…” he trailed off and began again.  “She’s beautiful.”

You felt your face getting hot and you shuffled your feet nervously.

“I’ll leave you two be, then,” the scientist nodded before awkwardly stepping back.  “One thing, soldat,” he added, looking the soldier in the eyes.  “Do whatever you need to with her in order to… relax.  We ask only one thing in return: your mission is to impregnate her.”

The soldier nodded and the scientist finally left.  

You felt very aware of the silence in the room as the soldier began to pace around you.

“You were created for me,” he posited.  You nodded quickly.  “Well, get on with it then.  Show me what you can do.”

You dropped to your knees, looking up at him as you palmed the front of his pants.  You felt his cock underneath the fabric growing harder, and you smiled.  

His uniform was somewhat difficult to open but you did your best and finally managed to get his cock exposed.  

You remembered what you had been trained to do and set forth to your task.  You had been programmed to love whatever he loved, get pleasure from his pleasure.  So as his head fell back and his fingers laced through your hair, you moaned with him, taking his cock as deep into your throat as you could fit it.

He was bigger than the men who had trained you, and harder to swallow.  You did your best and earned a groan from him in reply.  The fingers in your hair curled into a fist and the pain of your hair being pulled was unexpected but arousing.  

You used your hand to stroke the parts of him your mouth couldn’t reach.  You looked up and watched him as he watched you, his eyes piercing into you with fiery intensity. 

“Stop,” he gritted out suddenly.  You pulled back and released his cock from your mouth. 

“I-I’m sorry,” you whimpered, “I’ve done something wrong.”

“No,” he shook his head, “I have a mission of my own.  Stand up.”

You obeyed quickly, so quickly that you felt a little light-headed.  

“Take off your dress,” he commanded.  It was designed to come off easily, and with just a few opened snaps it fell to the ground.  “Help me take off my chest plate,” he added, and you stepped forward to begin undoing the straps of his gear.  He watched your nimble, delicate fingers and thought they looked a bit out of place next to his armor.  But you did manage to get it off, and he shrugged his shoulders to help you slide it off his arms.  Instead of tossing it to the ground though, you folded it and set it on top of a nearby counter-top.  

“What did you do that for?” he asked.

“Would you like me not to?” you countered.

“No, it’s fine,” he nodded.

He took off his boots and you set them aside while he shimmied off his trousers.  You didn’t stare at his naked form for too long, because he hadn’t asked you to, but you were sure you’d never seen anything so perfect.  You understood that you were made for him, but now it felt like he was made for you too, in a way.  

He pulled you towards him, pressing his body against yours.  He was so warm, and you smiled as you melted into his embrace.

“Kiss me,” he requested.  You slipped your arms around his neck and leaned in, but stopped just as your face was right against his.

“How?” you asked.  He seemed confused.  “There are different ways.”

“Whatever you want to do,” he answered.  That didn’t make much sense to you, but you didn’t want to keep him waiting any longer.  You pressed your lips against his as your eyes fluttered shut, feeling the stubble on his face scratch you a bit.  His hand held the back of your neck as he deepened the kiss, his tongue delicately beginning to explore between your lips.  You moaned a little against him, savoring his taste.  After all this time, it felt so right to be in his arms like this.  Your life had meaning, your existence had value, and you were so lucky to be here providing whatever he needed.

He pulled back from the kiss and you found yourself chasing him for just a moment before you stopped, meeting his half-lidded gaze.  “Mine,” he said quietly.  “All mine.”

You nodded, biting your lip a little.  

He bent you over the bed, one hand tangled into your hair to hold you up and the other guiding his cock to your entrance.

They had prepared you for everything but this.  They explained that you needed to be untouched here, for him, and that you didn’t have to worry about being good at this part.  All you needed to do was follow his instructions.

“Please,” you begged, “put your cock inside me.  I need to feel you inside me.”

He slipped into you in one motion, plowing through the resistance of your walls and grabbing your hips when he bottomed out.  Pain seared through you but it was irrelevant.  He didn’t take long before he began to pull back and push into you again, and you focused on suppressing your whimpers as you figured he wouldn’t like to hear you in pain.  If he wanted to, he would hurt you more, and you were ready for that if it was what he needed.

“Does… does it feel good?” you asked weakly between shallow breaths.

“Yes,” he hissed sharply.  You smiled, sighing with relief as tears of joy prickled your eyes.  

“I’m so happy,” you admitted, savoring the feeling of purpose fulfilled.  “Tell me how to be good for you.  I want to be good for you.”

He leaned in and wrapped his arms around your body, putting his lips right against the shell of your ear.  “You want to be good for me?” he repeated.

“Yes,” you sobbed, “please.”

“Tell me how much you love it,” he demanded.  “Tell me how much you love my cock inside you.”

“Soldat, I love it so much,” you cried, “it’s everything I ever dreamed of.  It feels so good to be yours.  I love your cock inside me.  I love you.”

He laughed a little, kissing the shell of your ear.  “You don’t even know me.”

“I don’t need to,” you explained, “you’re my mission.”

“You’re bleeding a bit,” he realized as he looked down at where your bodies conjoined.  

“I’m sorry,” you apologized.

“It’s not your fault,” he corrected.  “Don’t apologize.”

You almost apologized again for apologizing, but realized that would be stupid and just murmured out an awkward “okay.”  

“Am I hurting you?” he asked in a way that made you unsure if he wanted to hurt you or not.

“Please don’t stop,” you avoided answering, because it didn’t really matter.

He adjusted his angle so that each movement was deeper, the tip of his cock brushing against something inside you that made you nearly scream from overwhelming sensation.  He was claiming you so thoroughly that you felt like your body was being molded to his shape, just as your mind had been molded to his presence, and it was intoxicating.

You savored every moment of it, hoping it wouldn’t be over soon and you could stay like this for a while-- although you knew a quick finish was a sign of a job well done, so you were a little torn on how to feel.  In the end, you would be satisfied with whatever he gave you.

You’d never been told that you could come, but you were starting to put it together as pressure built inside you, leaving you incapable of suppressing your moans.

“Yes,” you found yourself chanting, over and over, without really meaning to.

“Louder,” he demanded, and you hadn’t known you could get much louder until you did.

“Yes!” you screamed.  

“Beg,” he growled, his own voice growing in volume.  That you definitely knew how to do.

“Please!  Please don’t stop!” you sobbed.  

Even with how loud you were, you could hear the sounds of skin on skin as he pounded into you and you loved it.  You loved the way his fingers, metal and flesh, dug into your hips as he held you down, keeping you from lurching forward from his forcefulness.  You loved the smell of sweat and sex and damp concrete and old leather.  You loved everything about this moment.  

“Fuck, ‘m close,” he grunted.

“Please,” you repeated, your voice nearly going out, “please come inside me, I need it, I need you, I’m yours, soldat, please-- yes!” 

You gasped as an orgasm crashed into you like one of those rainstorms that start with just a sprinkle and then instantly become torrential; thunder, lightning, the whole shebang.  You’d never seen a rainstorm like that, but that’s what you would’ve compared it to if you had.

He moaned loudly when he came, continuing to pump into you until he was sure that he’d spilled every drop.  The flutter of your walls milked his cock encouragingly and it all produced a cycle that you wished could last forever.

“Stay still,” he demanded breathlessly, holding you down even though you had no desire to resist.  “Stay right there, fuck, don’t move.”

You nodded against the pillow.  You listened to his breathing as it slowed, relishing the feeling of his cock pulsing inside you.

He pulled out of you and both of you winced a little, him laying down beside you gently.

“It’s better if you don’t move,” he explained, and you weren’t sure what exactly was better, but you trusted his judgment regardless.  

The bed was small-- it was never meant for two people.  But you loved being pressed against him as he laid on his side and ran his fingers down your back.  It made you shiver, but it made you smile, too.

“Did I do well?” you asked weakly.

“Yes,” he nodded.  

You both caught your breath for a while, and you just soaked in the way his arms wrapped around your shoulders, like you fit together perfectly.  

“Can you handle another round?” he asked quietly after a few minutes had passed.  You jumped up at the opportunity to make him happy again. 

“I can handle anything you need me to do,” you answered eagerly.

He pulled you onto his lap, looking up at you as he maneuvered his cock towards your entrance again.  You sank down onto him and ignored the sting of soreness as your body accepted him once more.

“Yes,” he hissed, “just like that.”

You keened at the praise, arching your back a little more as he pulled you down to lay on his chest.

You felt him holding back a little bit, reacting to your whimpers of pain as his cock pushed even deeper into you than it had before.

“Don’t restrain yourself, please,” you begged.  “I want all of you.”

“I thought this was about what I wanted,” he whispered against your ear.

“It is,” you confirmed, “and I can tell you want more.”

He kissed underneath your ear with a smile.  “I’m afraid I’ll break you.”

“Never worry about me,” you shook your head.

“Ask me for it then.  Ask me for what you want.”

“I don’t want anything that you don’t,” you replied, confused.  He pulled you closer and held you down against his muscled chest. 

“Then ask me for what I want.”

You pulled back from his embrace to examine his face, which was looking back at you expectantly.

“Fuck me hard, soldat,” you begged in a weak voice, “please, I want you to use me--”

Before you could even finish he was grabbing you again and holding you still as he bucked his hips up into you, fucking you ruthlessly.  You cried out with joy as your head fell back, and he leaned into suck at one of your nipples which made your whole body tense up.

“Ride my cock,” he instructed, “show me how much you want it.”

“You know I need you,” you gasped as you followed his command, bouncing on top of him as he released his grip on you to free your movements.  He slipped a finger between your bodies to roughly rub at your clit and you choked.  “S-soldat,” you whimpered.

“Feels good?” 

“I don’t need it,” you explained, “I don’t need anything but you.”

“What if I want you to come right now?  Can you?”

You felt guilt burn through your chest.  “I-I’m sorry,” you cried, “I’m close but… I can’t yet.  I’m so sorry.”

“It’s okay,” he soothed, stopping you from riding him for a moment.  “I was just curious.  You don’t need to.”

“Please don’t think you need to do anything for me,” you added quickly.

“I want to,” he assured.  “I want you to like it.”

You almost laughed.  What a ridiculous concept.  “I love it.  As long as you’re happy, I love it.”

He smiled, wrapping a hand around the back of your neck to pull you into a kiss.  “I’m happy,” he whispered, and you started to move again, gasping as you gripped his chest to keep your balance.  

This one was different from the last.  It didn’t make your skin burn or your bones sore.  There was an ache, yes, but a softer one, one that snuck up on you as you clutched his face and he looked at you with an expression that reminded you of how you felt about him.  Like he couldn’t get enough of you, like you were everything, like you were the only thing.

He only asked one thing of you that time.  “Say that you love me again,” he requested in a soft voice.

“I love you,” you told him, and you kept telling him until you were too close to form words anymore and he pulled you into one more kiss, deep and slow and perfect, as you wrapped yourself around each other and fell backwards into the abyss of pleasure.

You laid in silence after that, just holding each other as you waited for your panting to still into slow, meditative breaths.  

You weren’t sure what to do now.  He didn’t seem like he knew, either.

“Would you prefer I keep you company, or that I leave?” you asked.

“Stay,” he decided.

“What would you like me to do?”

“Lay with me.”

You nodded, nuzzling into his chest and letting your eyes flutter shut.

The next few weeks passed relatively quickly.  Certainly faster than any weeks of training had.  There wasn’t much to do but make love so that made up 80% of what you did, the rest going to sleeping and the occasional meal.  One time he taught you about his gun, showed you how to take it apart and put it back together, and you had found it pretty interesting.  Mainly because he was the one explaining it, but still.

You asked him to wake you up before he left for his mission but he didn’t.  You woke up to an empty bed, and you’d think you would’ve been prepared for that after years of it, but just so little time with him had spoiled you.  You cried a bit but got over it quickly, straightening up and deciding you needed to be prepared for his return.  You anticipated that he would need a lot from you after having to work.

You were right.  You had been meditating when he flung open the door, and you jumped up.  He looked so different with all his gear on, including the mask and goggles.  

He stormed across the room, tossing away the coverings on his face and kissing you with an intensity that bordered on rage.  You reciprocated, glad that he had finally stopped asking you for what he wanted and learned to take what he needed.  He seemed to understand now that you could handle it.

It was a fury of tearing at clothes and pulling at hair and biting at skin after that, and you ignored the blood in his hair as you ran your fingers through it.

You frankly had no idea what he was doing when he laid you down on the bed only to slide down and start biting at your thighs, though you had no intention to question it.  As he suddenly licked a thick stripe over your sex, it was like you had stumbled into an entirely new world.  He found your most sensitive places and targeted them with the same ruthless efficiency he approached nearly everything in his life.

He had shown you pleasure that made you melt but this was like something else, something that made you grip the sheets and kick your legs and arch your back.  He had to hold your hips down to keep you from bucking against him, and when the growls he emitted against you didn’t get the message across, he let his teeth graze over your bud.  You yelped but finally stilled-- at least, as best you could.

You were speechless, even as you realized that you should remind him that he was focusing too much on you, that you wanted to make sure he was happy too…

But then again, this was what he had wanted.  What he needed, it felt like.  And who were you to doubt that?

So you let your head fall back as he sent you headfirst into a violently powerful orgasm, enough to make your entire body shake as you made sounds you hadn’t realized before that you could make.

And that seemed to only inspire him to keep going, offering you no reprieve as he kept you suspended in the peak of your sensation.

Tears burned your eyes as you were overwhelmed by him, numbness prickling at the tips of your fingers and toes and even in the places he was licking you.  You were so lost in it that you didn’t even notice he had stopped until he slipped his cock into you, still holding your hips down as he finally fucked you.

He stayed upright for a while before leaning down and caging you in under his arms.  He smelled like gasoline and gunpowder.  

“Mine,” he growled, right against your ear, sending chills over your skin.  

“Yours,” you agreed quickly, your voice coming out broken and wavering.  “Just yours, only yours, please--”

He rubbed that spot above your opening with his thumb again and you wrapped your legs around his hips.  “Ohh, yes,” you whimpered.

He kissed you and where you had found fire before, you found rain.  You felt his suffering, the exhaustion that sank deep into his bones and never seemed to leave.  You felt his guilt for leaving you.  You felt his guilt for coming back.

You hoped that you could kiss him back in just the right way that would say everything you wanted to tell him. It’s okay, you’re okay, we’re okay.

You loved the entire concept of we.  You loved being with him, in any way, although admittedly this way was your personal favorite.  It was the language both of you seemed to understand best.

Just a moment after he pulled back and looked into your eyes, you heard the beeping of his door being unlocked.

He jumped a bit before pulling the wrinkled sheet up over the both of you as the scientist walked in briskly, not even seeming to care that he was obviously interrupting a private moment. 

“Okay soldat, time to go back on ice,” the scientist informed you both mundanely.

“No,” the soldier refused.  “I don’t want to.  I’ll stay awake until the next mission.”

“Not an option,” the scientist shook his head.  “Come on, get dressed and let’s go.”

He sighed as he obeyed, slipping past you and standing up as he found his discarded clothing and put it back on.

“What will happen to her?” he asked, looking at you where you were laying on the bed, nervously clutching the sheet to your chest.

“She’ll wait.”

“You’re going to put her under too?”

The scientist didn’t answer, and the soldier clenched his jaw.  

“You’re going to keep her awake, aren’t you?  So you and your colleagues can keep ‘training’ her.”

Still no answer.

You yelped instinctively when the soldier grabbed you, pulling you up holding you in front of him with a hand around your neck.  You scrambled for footing but made no effort to cover yourself; it was nothing the scientist hadn’t seen before.  You relaxed into the soldier’s arms once you understood what had happened.  You trusted him.  If he hurt you, there would be a reason for it, and you were ready. 

“I’m not going under,” the soldier hissed.  “Don’t come any closer or I’ll kill her.”

The scientist shrugged.  “She’s yours to do with as you please.  It’s no skin off my nose.”

“Didn’t you say that you spent a lot of money on her?”

“We spent more on you.”

“What if I told you that she’s pregnant?”

The scientist’s eyes went wide.  That seemed to get his attention.  “There’s no way you could know that.  Our tests haven’t come back yet.”

“But we both know that she could be.  How much trouble would you get in if the tests come back positive but she’s already dead?”

He pressed his lips against your ear, gripping you tighter.  “You’d die for me, right?  If I wanted to kill you now?”

“Yes,” you nodded as best you could with the metal hand around your throat, “of course.  Anything for you.”

“Maybe you trained her too well,” the soldier mocked as he addressed the scientist again.

“Alright, alright,” the scientist relented, “we’ll meet your demands just… let her go.”

“I won’t go under,” he repeated, “and no one will touch her but me.”

“Of course,” the scientist rushed, “anything.  Let her go, please.”

The soldier dropped you to the floor and you clung to his legs, laying yourself at his feet.  The scientist slinked out of the room, apparently to inform everyone that the soldier would not be going into cryo as expected, but all you could think about was what he had said.  No one will touch her but me.  It was like a dream come true.  You could stay with him and make him happy, he wouldn’t have to leave you, you wouldn’t have to practice on anyone.  You could just be his. 

He knelt down to join you on the floor, wrapping his arms around you.  “Never let anybody near you but me, okay?  You’re mine.”

You nodded, looking up at him with teary eyes.  “Of course.”

“I wouldn’t hurt you like that.  I’m gonna protect you.”

“Whatever you want,” you insisted.  You felt his hand on your stomach and you looked down at it, putting your own hand on top of his.

“They’re going to take it away,” he realized solemnly.  You weren’t sure what to say.  You just wanted him to feel better.  He looked at you and glanced to where you both knew a camera was watching you from the corner, and he leaned in to kiss your cheek.  “We won’t let them,” he whispered.  “We’re going to get out, with the baby.”

You nodded a little, and leaned in to rest your head on his shoulder.  You closed your eyes as he stroked your hair and at some point you fell asleep, and you dreamt of things you didn’t understand-- freedom, choice, family.  You dreamt of a world you hadn’t experienced yet; or at least, one that you couldn’t remember.  He stayed awake, but as he carried you to the bed in his arms and laid beside you, he was dreaming too.

#bucky barnes x reader #winter soldier x reader #winter soldier smut #winter soldier x y/n #winter soldier fanfiction #bucky barnes smut #bucky x reader #bucky barns imagine #bucky barnes x y/n

[nevertheless-moving]

Suicidal Misunderstanding VII

Star Wars Time Travel AU #27

Part I - - - Part II - - - Part III - - - Part IV - - - Part V - - - Part VI

CONTENT WARNING: Please be advised this chapter may contain triggering material. More detail available in tags. 

It wasn’t until Anakin was staring at the hot sauce bottles and solitary mysterious green takeout container that he remembered they were at war, and therefore no longer in the habit of restocking the apartment’s cold stasis.

“Obi-Wan, there’s nothing to eat!” 

"I know!” came the call back. “I’m trying to meditate!”

Anakin closed the stasis door and walked back out to the common room. Obi-Wan sat crosslegged on the window sill.

“Do or do not, there is no try,” the knight quipped.

Obi-Wan opened his eyes to look fondly at the man standing before him. Maybe tomorrow, when he woke alone in a dusty desert hovel, he would regret letting himself play pretend for so long. Maybe this whole day would fade from his memory like a dream.

But right now, he felt... peaceful. He wouldn’t claim to be satisfied by the explanations he imagined for Anakin, but it would have been far more disturbing if he somehow came up with an actually sympathetic justification for genocide. He got to say and hear a number of goodbyes. He even got to cry over Anakin with the comfort of his presence. 

Now he had to let go, to be there for Luke. (And he could always get more spice...)

“I guess if you need to meditate, I can go pick us up food from the Temple Tapcaf.” Anakin offered. 

“Thank you, Anakin. Today...helped. More than I can explain.” Obi-Wan said softly.

“I- I don’t really deserve that. Considering it was all my fault.” Anakin bowed his head, helpless for words, but uncomfortable with being praised.

“Not every terrible thing that has happened is your fault. You made a series of terrible choices, yes. But there were, there are, other dark forces at work and not a single Jedi in the order was able to stop them. At least for a short time today I was able to set that aside, so for what it’s worth, thank you.”

“Kriff.” Anakin said shocked. “Of course there’s more. Ok. That’s all right, we-” he was cut off by a growl from Obi-Wan’s stomach. 

A snort of laughter escaped before Anakin smacked a hand over his mouth. “Alright, I’m going to the Tapcaf, you just...meditate until I get back.”

Obi-Wan swallowed and nodded, “I love you so much.” 

“Force Obi-Wan, you’re going to make me start crying again.” He pulled him into a bear hug. “Don’t do anything stupid while I’m not gone, ok? Just...meditate. And drink some water.”

"Hmm, I don’t know. Some of my best choices recently have been stupid,” Obi-Wan laughed. The words were light, but Anakin felt a prickle of unease, a hint of danger. There was no clear cause, and Obi-Wan seemed relaxed but...

Anakin gripped his Master’s shoulders, staring him dead in the eye. “Promise me you won’t do anything stupid.”

Obi-Wan sighed, “I promise.” He pulled Anakin down to press a kiss to his forehead. “Goodbye, Anakin.”

"I’ll be back in 20 minutes.” He paused, then mumbled, “i love you too” before speeding out the door.

Obi-Wan settled back into meditation, reaching inwards. Everything but his body and the light within faded. He magnified his hunger, his thirst, visualizing the pack of dried jerky in his hut, the precious jars of water in the basement. He could almost feel the heat that never quite abandoned Tatooine, even during the short nights. He opened his eyes

and saw the temple apartment.

He shut them again quickly. He was sure he could snap himself out of this. He sank deeper inward, careful to leave his shields perfectly intact. With the galaxy as dim as it was, a real show of force had the potential to grab attention across star systems. Force purging toxins, fortunately, was more a matter of internal concentration than outward power. It was one of the first skills Obi-Wan had truly mastered as a Jedi, thanks to numerous kidnappings at the start of his apprenticeship and hard drinking towards the end. 

It was uncomfortable to be that keenly aware of one’s kidneys, but Obi-Wan managed. It was less intense than a healing trance, anyway. His heart rate increased as various metabolic processes sped up- and almost immediately slowed down. Huh. The drug must of almost run its natural course, and now he 

still in the temple.

Kark. Shit. 

‘Breathe’ he thought. Stress was only going to increase his chances of a stroke. Alright, so meditation wasn’t working. Maybe he could try for longer, but part of him was nervous that if ‘Anakin’ returned he’d lose the willpower, and so far the passage of time had been extremely linear. He was too invested in the fantasy at this point for anything easy.

Remember your training. Your eyes can deceive you, do not trust them. 

Padawans were taught three main methodologies to move beyond mindtricks, hallucinations, visions, and the like. Looking In, Reaching Out, and Breaking Out. 

Looking in wasn’t working. That left the other two options. In the past, when his senses were lying to him he could always trust in the force, but now...it was just too much risk. Reaching out like that, with his whole self, meant the chance of finding someone.

That left breaking out. Obi-Wan jumped up, staring intensely at the details in the molding, the stains on the carpet, at everything. At no point today had he spotted objects fading to grey in the corner his vision, or ripple as memories from different time frames overlapped, but surely there must be some weak point.

Nothing. 

Shit, he really had stayed too long. Alright then, time for more uncivilized measures.

He walked to the kitchen and pulled their butcher’s vibroblade from its block, holding it to his neck, then hesitated.

This had to be done, but it didn’t make it any less unsettling. It was his own fault for lingering in the delusion so long; all the more palatable paths to escape had closed off, and after all he had been through he refused to die from a drug overdose. Gods, it might take years for someone to find the body.

He steeled himself, bringing the blade back up decisively only to drop it with a clatter. Pressing a hand to his throat, he was unnerved but not entirely surprised to find a stinging line of pain. His hand came away wet with blood. He instinctively pressed both hands to the cut, pulse rapid and heavy and slippery beneath his palms.

It’s just a hallucination. It’s just an extremely vivid hallucination.

A thought occurred to Obi-Wan then, and he felt something in the pit of his stomach drop in horror.

What if...what if the blade was real. What if he was actually moving around his home right now, hazily sleepwalking in a pantomime of the peaceful stroll and tender embraces he was imagining. It would explain the immediate relief from the water this morning...hadn’t he found his way to food and water even dazed from sleep-debt and blood-loss during the war?

He had a vibroblade in the desert too...

His pulse pounded harder beneath his hands. The cut wasn’t even that deep, but for the first time Obi-Wan felt the true existential horror of his current trap well up. If he didn’t know where the walls were...how could he escape.

He took a deep breath, acknowledging and letting go of his panic.

He had the force. He would just have to be delicate in his application. He picked up the bloodied tool from the floor but decided to simply to clip it to his belt for now. A force-null object would be harder to distinguish at first touch.

Obi-Wan walked to his temple bedroom and opened the barest crack in his shields, just enough to reach out, get a sense of existing currents in the force. He stirred at one until a small vortex of light formed. To anyone looking, it would appear a naturally occurring, low-powered whirlpool, common enough on Tattoine. Any gentle moves he made in the minutes before it fell apart would hopefully be obscured by its wake.

He hesitantly laid a hand on the lightsaber on his bedside table, lowering his shields a little further. His heart sunk when he realized that his memory had even recreated the perception of force-imbued temple walls in the periphery. The Kyber in his saber reverberated with a familiar song. He jerked his hand away. That felt too much like his real lightsaber. He couldn’t risk it. 

Before Obi-Wan truly began to panic again, he realized something missing. Anakin’s- Darth Vader’s saber. Since picking it up on Mustafar, the crystal in it had screamed at him, halfway to corruption. When he touched the blade he could almost feel... feel what horrors it had been bent to commit.

Most of the time he left it buried under a rock pile in his basement, too afraid to work on healing it.

He couldn’t hear it now- but he could feel the memory of what it used to be.

It sat innocently on his Anakin’s bedside table. There was a tinge of darkness to it of course- this saber had only ever known war. But when he rested a hand on the blade it was clear this belonged to the memory he had walked with today, not the tyranny of reality.

Grasping it firmly, he marched back to the windowsill and settled, intent on his choice. Sunsets here couldn’t compare to tattooine- they were just too different. The binary play transformed the infinite horizon. It was something on Tatooine he unabashedly marveled at.

Courasant, on the other hand, transformed the sun into a reflection of itself. Untold millions of transparisteel buildings refracted the star painfully at some points while casting shadows on the rest. The filter of light through constant smog resulted in strange shades of neon green and blood red. It was beautiful, but uncomfortable to look at too long.

He closed his eyes and pressed the saber to his chest.

---

Anakin was impatiently waiting in the hot service line when the urge to return to his apartment insistently welled up again. He pushed it back of course- Obi-Wan needed food and Anakin couldn’t keep putting his own selfish impulses in front of his Master’s wellbeing.

He held out for a few seconds, but the itch was getting stronger, sharper. He looked down at the tray- it already had most of Obi-Wan’s cold favorites, but he really wanted to get him his favorite soup if the line would just move a little faster. He jolted when, for the first time that day, Obi-Wan’s shielding thinned the slightest amount. Not enough to get anything clear, but the fact that there was movement at all...

He left the line; they could always come back together if Obi-Wan wanted. Hells, maybe they’d do a late night visit to Dex’s for some real comfort food. Anakin still couldn’t get a sense of what Obi-Wan was up to through their muffled bond. He felt a buzz in his ears, not unlike the moment before an enemy blow.

He picked up speed, tea sloshing in its thermoflask. An elder looked at him annoyed as darted around him.

He started speed walking in earnest as the feeling got more intense. A sandwich fell to the wayside.

Speed walking quickly switched to jogging, then running; there was a shout of complaint as he ditched the whole tray carelessly behind.

He took the last few hallways at a full-out force-assisted sprint, the Force itself screaming at him to move. A small part of his mind thought we’re safe inside the temple Obi-Wan promised not to do anything stupid i’m going to get such shit for freaking out over nothing. 

He sensed nothing from Obi-Wan over the bond; not a hint of fear or anger or surprise. He blurred around the last corner, feeling like he might throw up with his increasing, unexplained panic.

Not caringabout anything butgettingto Obi-Wan beforeitstoolate he smashed down the door at the same moment Obi-Wan, sitting peacefully by the window, turned on the lightsaber pointing directly at his heart.

Time seemed to slow. Splinters of the door frame hung in the air as Anakin desperately pulled the lightsaber away from Obi-Wan in the half-second between activation and ignition.

He wasn’t quite fast enough.

Blue plasma pierced Obi-Wan’s chest as time caught up. Pieces of the wall shattered like shrapnel as he turned, shocked to see Anakin. The saber flew away in a straight arrow. 

Anakin threw himself to Obi Wan’s side, wildly trying to draw heat away from the searing hole before it could vaporize the surrounding flesh. He couldn’t tell what the saber had pierced, or how far it had gone in considering its last second movement.

One hand trained on a hundred battle fields robotically reached for his comm-unit to call for emergency medical assistance. His mind however, had largely been left behind a few minutes ago, when he was trying to pick what Obi-Wan would want to eat for dinner.

What came out his mouth was more incoherent shrieking than anything else, but he had at least called the correct line for temple aid.

He threw down the comm, focus intent on controlling the smoldering burn. The air around them seemed to boil and Obi-Wan started struggling to get away. Anakin bodily held him down, finally finding words,

“What the FUCK, OBI-WAN! YOU LITERALLY JUST PROMISED NOT TO DO ANYTHING STUPID! YOU PROMISED!”

“that’s why- hkk I  have  to” Obi-Wan rasped.

“Karking Fuck.YOU- STOP MOVING!”

Anakin felt a twinge of danger come from the side but was too focused to do anything but shift his body as shield. A sharp pain pierced his gut but he ignored it. 

The air crackled with heat and power as the wound beneath him cooled. A faint trickle of dark blood oozed out, probably burns breaking from recent movement, considering the instant cauterization. He couldn’t see any light coming through, which meant he had moved the saber at least a quarter klick before it activated, Anakin thought semi hysterically.

Finally, someone showed up to investigate the disturbance. In truth, probably less than a minute had passed since Anakin entered the room, but he really didn’t care.

“HELP ME!” Anakin shouted.

“What happened?” Mace Windu asked grimly, falling to the ground next to them. Not waiting for an answer, he set his lit saber aside and placed his hand to Obi-Wan’s forehead, stilling the violent thrashing.

Anakin opened his mouth but he just didn’t have the words. He didn’t know. 

“General Skywalker, report.” Mace Windu commanded sharply. 

“I left him alone to get dinner for us. I ran back and when I broke open the door he was holding the lightsaber to his chest. I tried...to pull it away. It pierced him, and I’ve been trying to manage the initial burn risk. I called for medi but I don’t know their eta.”

“They’re behind me. How did you get stabbed?” the Master demanded.

“How did I what?” Anakin looked down to see a vibroblade sticking out from his left side. Right, the pain from before. Obi-Wan suddenly mustered up the energy to wake up despite his state and Windu’s compulsion. He looked around wildly before yanking the knife from Anakin’s side.

Anakin gasped, but managed to still his brother’s hand using the force before he could finish bringing it up to his neck, which Anakin just noticed was bloody.

“STOP TRYING TO DIE!” Anakin screeched.

“...I’m...not....I’m....trying.....to...” 

But before Obi-Wan could finish the sentence, the healers finally arrived, pushing Windu aside to grab hold of Anakin and Obi-Wan. He could feel a buzz of energy go through him, stopping at the growing damp patch at his side. He tried to push the man away but the heat in the room was starting to make him dizzy

“I’m fine! Focus on Obi-Wan.”

Mace placed a hand on his shoulder, and in the gentlest voice he had ever heard from the man, said, “You’ve been stabbed Anakin. Let the healers help both of you- you’ve done well looking out for him.”

Obi-Wan, still occasional thrashing was being loaded onto a hoverstrech for transport. A second stretcher waited next to it. 

“Master Windu! He’s fighting us,” Master Che called sharply. “Can you tell us what happened?”

“Master Kenobi tried to kill himself,” Windu replied flatly. “His wounds are self inflicted and he’s violently fighting assistance” 

There was a beat as that information was processed. Knight Bant, who must have arrived at some point, said in slightly less flat voice, “He displayed erratic behavior earlier today, and I ruled out drug interactions.”

“Thank you, Knight Bant.” Master Che plunged a syringe of some kind into Obi-Wans thigh. He finally stopped attempting to fight, falling down onto the board. “Red team, with me. Orange, you have Skywalker,” She instructed sharply. 

Anakin numbly watched most of the healers leave with Obi-Wan through a hole in the wall. He slowly started to stand and somehow ended up guided into a seat on the hoverboard. Looking down, he was surprised to see his tunic cut away in favor of a large bacta patch. 

“Hey,” he protested. “Who stabbed me?”

“We can discuss that after you have surgery,” A Human healer replied. Master Covamos, he thought.

“This is my fault” Anakin said, suddenly urgent. “I shouldn’t have left him. He told me goodbye, he was saying goodbye all day, I should have...”

“You saved his life,” Windu interrupted. “You got to him just in time, don’t waste your energy on should-haves. Now sleep.”

Anakin wanted to argue more, but instead found himself laying down, vision blurring. His face felt damp, had he been stabbed more than once? Windu said a few more words he couldn’t quite make out. There was a brief stinging sensation, then everything faded away. 

----

Part VIII

#star wars #potentially triggering #self harm #attempted suicide #blood #graphic depictions of injury #violence #character is not actually suicidal but is severely divorced from reality due to space wizard plot device #suicidal misunderstanding au #my au #star wars au no 27 #angst #obi wan kenobi needs a hug #KRIFF this was intense to write #i need a hug #jeez #story was supposed to go emotional catharsis Healing TRAUMA healing Emotional Catharsis but i may have played myself with the middle bit #hope you enjoy :) #or at least suffer with me

[fairytsuk1]

sweet japan breeze | (f)

pairing: izuku midoriya x reader

genre: fluff

words: 3.2k

summary:

Midoriya grins as he traces the soft bridge of your nose, immediately looking away when you turn.

"Is there something on my face?"

"No! No, not at all."

Just the lack of a kiss, is all.

Sweat soaks through your white collared shirt and a string of curses towards the Department of Rare-Quirked Animals goes with it. Gracing you with a uniform more befitting of a tennis player, you grumble noisily. The net handle nearly slips out of your slick hands until you fumble and hold it with a grip that turns your palms white. You can see Midoriya’s green hair appear in your field of vision. He’s trying to act as if he isn’t squinting and analyzing your every behavior, but he is. The look makes you feel like you’re the rare-quirked animal.

“...What,” you squint back at him, squaring your shoulders to face him head on, “are you looking at?”

“What?! Sorry, were you concentrating? You just looked really stressed so I thought you might want a snack,” Midoriya whips his head left and right before sheepishly smiling at you, “I think we’re off trail anyways, my bad!”

You can’t find it in yourself to be annoyed with him, he’s been your partner since you first joined the DORQA. Your head aches at the thought of the insufferable acronym. If you had to see one more poster promoting their stupid monogram, you might need to be locked up.

But him. Your partner Izuku Midoriya...he always had a gleam in his emerald eyes no matter the job, and he always regarded you with a warm smile! He was the epitome of warmth and sunshine, your heart twinged at the thought of you ruining that with your sourpuss attitude.

Your hand brushes his as you take the protein bar, Midoriya’s face lighting up into beautiful shades of salmon. His back straightens and the apples of his cheeks lift. He’s so inexperienced that it’s funny to watch. He was also definitely a people-pleaser; normally you’d poke fun of him but you were too exhausted to do anything but munch on the almond-chocolate bar.

“I’m gonna radio back to headquarters so we can go back to our tent and get some dinner.”

He pulls his radio out and extends the antenna before turning away to call. A realization dawns on you whilst scanning the clear sky. It’s been four days and the white speckled fox was nowhere to be found. There hadn’t even been droppings or footprints; classifying it as extinct would make your life a lot easier but would lead to repercussions in Aizawa’s office. Aizawa...well, you didn’t want to know what would happen if you even dared to think about it.

There was absolutely no way you were going to let him call headquarters and let them know you’d failed on the excursion you begged to go on. It was just plain humiliating; the thought of Bakugou’s smug grin made you want to strangle someone. Bakugou wasn’t even here!

Midoriya had been moments away from speaking until a big fat finger slammed onto the hang-up button. Your foot beat on the ground, aura reeking of stubbornness. Midoriya cried out and turned to remedy the building lecture he was going to receive from Aizawa. You were quicker than him, swiping like a cat and jerking the phone from his grasp. The device cascaded into soft dirt and was nearly squashed under steel-toed boots.

“No way are we telling headquarters we haven’t found that damn fox yet, we’ll be here till we die as far as I’m concerned,”

“But I feel like we’re getting burnt out! Aizawa will understand!”

A loud sigh rings out as you press your palm to your forehead, squeezing your eyes shut as an attempt to calm down. “Understand my ass!” Retrieving his phone, you toss it to the boy and he lets out a sigh of relief.

“Let’s just go back to camp, okay? I can sway you with more food, can’t I?”

Your cheek twitches with the urge to smile as your eyes roll, settling on him dramatically. You cross your arms, he wasn’t going to win this battle.

“You think I’m gonna listen to you?”

“No, but I think I’m the more responsible one out of the two of us so I should at least try!”

Your shoulders drop as your jaw opens, a gasp of disbelief coming from your lips. If it had been anyone else, you would’ve screamed about the toxicity in the workplace as you stomped to Toshinori’s office. But in this moment, all you could feel was warmth washing over you. Embarrassment, you were responsible!

“I can be very responsible for your information, write that down in your little notebook!”

Picking up the forgotten net with a harrumph, you stomp your shoe to kick off dirt before walking away. Only two steps ahead, your body quickly turns around adorning the smile of someone who was losing their mind.

“You may be more responsible, but I’m more determined! I’m finding that fucking fox and you can come with me or not!”

You secretly pray he won’t report this, the termination letter left on your desk would be the final straw, your new life beginning by moving countries away and living within a secluded cabin. A strand of hair falls into your face and frustration explodes out of you with ascream. Shaking your hair out before tying it back up, Midoriya’s lips are strawberry and swollen at that point. With the way he’s biting them; they’ll turn into a pretty cherry red soon.

He shakes his head too, clearing the budding laugh in his lungs. He might’ve even looked a bit beautiful had he not been laughing at you.

He was such a nerd.

“Of course I’m coming, what kind of partner would I be if I didn’t? Besides, you need someone to keep you from losing your mind,” he settles his net on his back (firmly strapped in, he would never let you forget that important tip.) You find yourself looking away. Your eyes tug at the wants of your consciousness, desperate to admire the way his forearm flexed when adjusting his belt.

“Did you know this fox is patient and a hard-worker? Looks like you two are total opposites.”

You don’t miss the subtle dig and there’s a bruise to your ego with the way he smirks at you. Retaliation comes easy when your arms swing to capture his head in your net, a proud grin covering up the hearty laugh.

“Whoops! Looks like I caught a total dork in the wild, how’d that happen?”

His voice feels like the sunshine shining on your skin as he shakes his hair out, fluffy with his sweat gleaming under the rays. You only had a few hours left till you were blinded, only able to see his freckles in the shadow of an orange fire. The cool air that would breeze through as the two of you sat in silence, tension soon replacing the chilling wind. You slept in separate tents, professionalism was still a thing.

But you did wonder how it would feel to cuddle up under his arm and stare at the tent ceiling together. Maybe even the sky on a grassy patch in the summer. You envied your daydreams.

Every once in a while, Midoriya’s tracker beeped to remind you of where you are (well, not really, it was so you didn’t die out in the middle of nowhere) which knocks you completely out of your haze. There was no red, white, speckles, or fox anywhere. Anger courses through you at the thought of having to return back to camp empty-handed; your shoes stomping harder into mud. You rub your eyes before taking a deep breath, ready to zero in on the next nearby animal.

“We should probably go back soon, I think I might run out of water unless we find a stream but then…”

Your partner’s voice fades into obscurity when you see it, a flash of white in the corner of your eye. So fast you might have almost missed it if it weren’t for your keen senses. You could practically hear the crunching of leaves as it ran behind a bush.

In that moment it would’ve been much better to yell shhh and come at it with an element of your surprise. Your mind blanks, legs springing into action with a fierce jump. Your vocal chords could only make out one word.

“FOX!”

Both bodies soar through the air, Midoriya following your lead as you crash through the bush. Bramble sticks you in your side and your eyes shut to embrace the impact your elbows, your whole body really, were about to receive. Wind knocks out of you as you grin once you can feel yourself fully settled on the ground.

“I got you, you little…” your eyes open. You blink once, twice, you even squeeze them a bit, “...bastard.”

There is no fox, even the trees have gone silent. The pinecone with white sparkles on it sits perched perfectly on its bottom, it’s mocking you. Surely.

“That’s—”

“I know what it is, Midoriya.”

Shivers run across his skin at your cold throaty voice. Your head plunks into the ground, you lay there for a bit. It hurts so bad, if only the Earth could crack open and swallow you whole. Maybe falling into the Earth’s crust wasn’t so bad, burning to death must be colder than the shame that courses through your veins.

You can practically taste it in your saliva.

How was it possible to have made this...this rookie mistake?

“I want to die, Midoriya.”

He shushes you and lays a warm, large hand between your shoulder blades to comfort you. He winces when the shirt drags across your skin due to the moisture soaked through it.

Gross. He opts for patting your back lightly.

“It’s alright, we all make mistakes.”

“I’m considering quitting the field. How much do accountants make?”

You can hear the smile in his voice, “an actual accountant? Or is that a metaphor for something else?” He’s holding back his laugh, snorts coming out every few seconds.

Your head shoots up to give him an incredulous look, you didn’t even think he knew about that type of stuff. Let alone have the bravery to say it, your mouth opens and closes as you scramble to find something to say.

“You’re a pervert!”

His laugh echoes in your ears again like before, your own sounding out at the absolute ridiculousness of it all. Leaping towards a pinecone and now lying with a mud stain on your pristine white shirt. Things could not have gone any worse with this type of turn around. Maybe this was the good ending.

Midoriya’s hand reaches to his pocket, digging out his tracker and standing from his squat.

“Ready to go eat some nice soup from a can?”

You snort and push yourself up, kicking the pinecone with the remnants of your anger before turning to him, “soup in a can?”

“It’s all we have…” he trails off and fiddles with his tracker, “soup. Soup is all we have…”

“Yeah, you said that. What’s up? Don’t tell me...did Aizawa find out I did that?! Did you leave your radio on?” you reach towards your pocket and pull your radio out, “did I?...”

The incessant beeping you were used to hearing was silent now. When Midoriya sheepishly looks at you, flashing the dark screen of his device you think you might try to find the nearest cliff.

“Oh wow, oh great. That’s just, it broke? Like just now, it decided to fucking break?”

Rapid nods in quick succession.

“Okay. This isn’t a joke or anything right?”

“No. It is broken and you left yours.”

You spend a few minutes screaming with a stick in your mouth at the sky, the makeshift gag effective at silencing you but the rage still swirls like a storm inside you as you pace incessantly. Midoriya sits on a log, trying to radio in or charge the tracker with sun power (“it doesn’t have that capability!”) but it’s a lost cause.

You’re stuck in the forest.

“Fuck! ”

It’s not long before you’ve given up hope. You’re going to die out here to some sort of animal that will eat the meat off your bones like a plate of ribs.

“Midoriya, I feel like we’re walking in circles. I’m also going to starve to death so we should call it quits.”

“I didn’t know you were so weak! I told you we should've gone back earlier, but you’re stubborn!”

He’s mildly irritated, you can tell by the way his jaw clenches while he looks rapidly for a familiar landmark. You feel bad, you didn’t mean to be so rude. He was way more put together than you were, you needed him.

Your eyes search the surroundings, looking for something to possibly cheer him up. “Berries!” Your hand leaves the back of his shirt and you miss his disappointed frown from the disappearance of your warmth.

“We can eat these, maybe there’s hope after all.”

These are poisonous, you learn this within the first few days. If there was one thing Midoriya liked, it was teaching. You were sure if he weren’t here, he’d be helping some little kid realize their dreams of working in the safari.

“Well, aren’t those like-the poisonous ones?! Don’t put anything in your mouth!” He grabs the bush branch and shakes it away from you, the berries falling with little thumps on the ground.

You grin.

“I must be going crazy, we have got to find a way home before I mistake you for a nice piece of broccoli.”

“Shush. Look, remember when I went to pee? I found a water source.”

You blink, a dead look in your face.

“Listen, I may think you’re attractive but I’m not drinking your pee.”

He scrambles for words and shakes his head with wide eyes.

“Attractive?! I was just-there was a stream so I took the time to purify it!”

“Oh! Well, I just thought you were taking a shit.”

“You’re being inappropriate!”

Had someone been listening in, all they would be able to hear were the pleads from a male and the wonderful laugh of his partner.

Midoriya always felt golden light flow through his chest when you were around. The trail you two were on continued downhill, a man-made path making itself known once the two of you kicked astrew leaves away, it was mutually agreed to head downhill as you (possibly) recalled going uphill to get where you were in the first place.

The stars were beginning to rear their pretty heads, speckling in and out of the sky and it left a heavy feeling in your chest. You didn’t want something to happen to either of you, unconsciously clinging to Midoriya harder, you sighed shakily.

“I was joking before, but I'm actually getting a little nervous.”

You admire his freckled jawline, illuminated by the lantern he’d broken out. He gives you a quick side glance, searching for a trick being placed before nodding.

“Me too. I’m really sorry about the tracker, I should’ve charged it!”

A huff escapes you from the way he was so utterly wrong, you were the one mistaking pinecones for foxes and being ridiculous.

“No way! I was the one being immature, I’m sorry about that one. We should’ve gone back like you said.”

His shoulders square a bit more, your frame shrinking in tandem. You two were like two animals, one protecting the other with its teeth bared and stance wide.

“You’re...You’re really the reason I’m here.”

“What?”

A beat of silence passes through the both of you, your lips ruby red from the way you gnawed on them with your anxiety chilling you.

“I just mean, you’re the reason I joined. You were so little, prattling on and on...It inspired me too. I probably wouldn’t have been able to get here if it wasn’t for you.”

He’s a bit shocked, half his face is lit and you can tell he doesn’t know what to say. His mouth opens and he can’t even resist the ear to ear grin making its way to imprint his feature.

“I-I mean...well! I’m glad,” he takes a deep breath, “I have to tell you something.”

Midoriya’s hands clench at his side, dripping with sweat as you look at him with big eyes, eagerly anticipating his anecdote.

You watch as if it’s slow motion, he takes a breath and the ghost of a word escapes him but the sound of a tiny scream beats him to the finish line. You’re sure he said something, but your eyes flit past his shoulder, lower, to stare dead in the eyes of a white speckled fox.

The two of you stare in a locked gaze as it’s tail swishes back and forth. You don’t even breath, blood rushing in your ears.

“You motherfucker.”

“Huh?”

You bound past Midoriya, heels digging so hard into the ground that dirt flies up in a cloud. It was like you nearly disappeared.

“The fox Midoriya, the fox!” you cry, “I need you!”

He wasn’t sure if it was the fact he’d confessed and your selective hearing had kicked in, or the fact that it was his job. He didn’t know what made him feel so happy, maybe it was the part of you saying you needed him.

A phrase so simple that struck him in the heart. His feet dashed behind you, lantern outstretched as he cried for you, “I’m coming!”

It was like life or death, but it wasn’t. Why did everything feel so emotionally charged? Your thighs ached and the threat of collapsing was gaining on you.

It hit you though, jumping from rock to rock, that red tailing practically swishing in your face.

“I like you. More than partners, like! I want us to, you know, date and stuff.”

It was totally jerky and awkward, but the words registered in your mind when the fox darted into its burrow. You pause, careful to not ruin it’s precious home. Midoriya comes barreling beside you, barely even panting while a stitch in your side wrecks your lungs.

“Did you get it?!”

“You like me?”

Midoriya gives you an incredulous look, “you’re asking that after we just ran all the way here?!”

“It has a family.”

He sighs a loud breath and squats, “yeah. It does.”

You stare at the opening and listen to the soft squeaks in the nighttime air.

“I like you too.”

His head snaps up, voice wavering while you two share an interlocked gaze.

“Really?”

A familiar smirk quirks up, “duh. What kind of a girl follows a boy into the same field if she doesn't like him?”

Oh! He supposed it should’ve been more obvious when it was worded like that. You plop down next to him, leaning fully against him.

“We can’t capture her. She is a mother.”

“I’m glad we agree.”

The stars shine the brightest at this moment, you can’t exactly see his freckles the way you could before but you know they’re still there.

“The moon looks beautiful tonight.”

“I’m glad I could share it with you.”

A soft nudge is given to your shoulder, “I didn’t know you were such a romantic.”

You snort and let your head hang. Midoriya resists the urge to kiss you right then and there.

“I don’t know, I guess foxes just do it for me.”

A wordless hum reverberates through his chest, shifting to wrap an arm around you. The moment’s sweet.

“So, how are we going to get back home?”

“I have no idea.”

#izuku x you #izuku midoriya x reader #midoriya izuku x reader #midoriya x reader #bnha x reader #boku no hero x reader #my hero academia x reader #mha x reader #izuku midoriya fluff

[madpanda75]

“Taking Chances Part 12: The Aftermath”

See how everyone reacts to Theo’s attack on the reader. Feelings get hurt, relationships are exposed, people shout. This chapter is ALL ANGST and FEELS! 😭

Trigger Warning: This chapter mentions assault and rape.

One thing at a time. That was all you could only focus on. Otherwise the reality of what had just happened would overwhelm you. Just one step at a time as you walked into the precinct with your family, Fin, and Amanda.

“Are you sure you don’t need to go to the hospital?” Amanda asked.

“I’m fine,” you mumbled, having barely spoken since Theo ran out of the gallery that morning. The metallic taste of blood still lingered on your tongue from where he had smacked you. 

Liv walked out of her office to greet you and your family, but before she could say anything, your father spoke up. “Please tell me you’re gonna get this bastard.” 

“Dom!” your mom scolded 

“No! Don’t ‘Dom’ me. That monster assaulted my baby. I could go out there right now and take care of it.”

“Dad! Please!” Bella interjected. “Let the cops do their job!”

“Ok, everyone lets calm down,” Olivia said over the bickering.

Your eyes darted between your sister and parents, arguing over what was best for you in this situation. You felt like a child, small and helpless. You also felt partly responsible for the unnecessary stress and worry your family was feeling right now. 

Mustering as much strength as you could, you reached into the darkest depths and found your voice. “I should’ve fought harder!” Your words reverberated around the room. Everyone halted and turned their attention to you. “I should’ve followed Phoebe to the front door. I know how she forgets to lock the door.” 

Olivia gently squeezed your shoulder. “You did exactly what you had to do. You survived.”

“She’s right,” Bella chimed in and wrapped her arm around you.

Your mom nodded and ran her fingers through your hair. “I’m just so grateful to God that you’re ok.” She sniffled and kissed you on the cheek. “My patatina.”

Just then a slightly sweaty and out of breath Rafael burst into the precinct. It looked as if he had run all the way from his office. “Y/N!” He pulled you into a tight embrace before realizing that bum rushing you after you had just been assaulted was not the best idea. Wanting to respect your personal space, he immediately jumped back. His eyes scanned your body for any injuries. “Are you ok?”

Tears welled in your eyes. “As well as can be expected.” 

With a tentative hand, he reached out and cupped your cheek. You trembled under his touch and wrapped your arms around him. Rafael enveloped you, silently praying to God, the Devil, or whatever Deity existed that kept you safe.

The squad looked at each other in total shock while witnessing the public display of affection between you and Rafael. 

Fin subtly turned towards Amanda. “Did you know these two were--”

“Nope,” she murmured. “And from the looks of it neither did Liv.”

“Let’s talk in here,” Olivia said, gently leading you away from Rafael and towards an empty interrogation room.

“Why don’t I get everyone a real cup of coffee other than that sludge they have here,” Rafael offered.

Your mother smiled. “Thank you. That would be nice.”

“I’ll take a latte,” Fin teased only to receive a deadpan stare from Rafael.

While everyone went their separate ways, Amanda and Fin got to work on getting an arrest warrant. “Wow. Barba and Carisi’s younger sister.” Fin shook his head in disbelief. 

“That explains why Carisi’s been acting the way he has,” Amanda said while searching on her laptop for Theo’s office building.

“Think Barba gave him the shiner?”

“I don’t know.” Amanda glanced up and saw a frantic Sonny bounding into the precinct. “But here’s your chance to ask him.”

“Where is she? Where’s my sister?” Sonny demanded.

“She’s in there talking to Olivia,” Amanda said. Sonny looked to where his partner was pointing. It was the interrogation room used to talk to victims. Victim. His sister was a victim. He couldn’t even wrap his mind around the concept. Through the window, he could see you sitting in between your mom and Bella while your dad paced back and forth in the background. 

He barged into the room without even knocking. “Son, why don’t you wait outside,” your father said, trying to lead Sonny out of the room. 

But he side swept him and knelt down in front of you. Tears were streaming down your cheeks. “Y/N, I’m so---”

You pushed Sonny away before he could finish. “I’m going to be sick,” you whimpered and ran to the bathroom. Your sister and mom trailed after you, each giving him a severe look.

Sonny stepped out of the interrogation room and plopped down in his chair, slamming his fist down on the desk so hard the metal rattled beneath his quivering hand. 

“Hey,” Fin said. “Don’t sweat it, Carisi. We’re gonna get this creep.”

“Yeah,” he mumbled and reached into his drawer for the Pepto Bismol. The Carisi nerves reared its ugly head. He felt green. His stomach churned with guilt, grief, and whatever was leftover from breakfast. 

Rafael stepped back into the bullpen with coffee and bagels from your favorite deli, knowing you probably hadn’t eaten a thing all day. Unfortunately for him, it was another Carisi he found. He brushed past Sonny towards Fin and Amanda. “Where are we with Theo?” 

“Just finishing up this arrest warrant. Although it’s gonna be hard to get a judge to sign off on it with so little evidence,” Fin said. Rafael shuddered at the thought of you undergoing a rape kit. Having a SANE nurse poke, scrape, and prod you, searching for DNA, fingerprints, skin, and semen.

“That’s SVU for ya’.” Amanda sighed. “A victim’s word is never good enough.”

Rafael whipped out his cell phone. “I’ll call in some favors at the office. Give them a heads up about the warrant. And for the record, I’m glad there wasn’t a lot of evidence.” He glared at the back of Sonny’s head. “This could’ve been a lot worse.”

Feeling Rafael’s eyes on him, Sonny turned. “What?” he snapped. “Ya’ got somethin’ to say. So just say it.”

“You just couldn’t leave us alone could you?” Rafael shook his head in disgust and started towards the interrogation room to dole out coffee and bagels when Sonny’s voice stopped him.

“What the hell does that mean?” he sneered

Rafael scoffed. “Don’t play naive now. Grow up and realize your actions have consequences.”

Fin watched as the two men provoked each other. “Hey, fellas. Chill.”

Sonny ignored Fin and walked over to Rafael, getting right in his face. “If you think for one second—”

“Guys c’mon,” Amanda chimed in. “ Don’t do this.”

Rafael held his ground. “I think that when you invited Theo you were stupid enough to believe that she would crawl back to him. And because of you that monster almost raped her.”

Sonny’s blood boiled. “How dare you! I love my sister more than anythin’ in this world.”

Rafael let out a mirthless laugh. “Got some way of showing it!” 

Everyone stopped their work and began inching closer towards the two men to get a prime view of the potential fight. Some of the junior officers had their phones out ready to capture the action. All eyes of the precinct were on Rafael and Sonny. 

Sensing this was seconds away from coming to blows, Fin stepped in. “Barba, that’s enough!”

Rafael eluded Fin’s attempt to keep the peace and continued, “I don’t care if she is your sister. I love that woman more than anything in this world and I will do anything to protect her. Especially since her brother doesn’t know how to.”

“Stop it! Both of you!” Your voice pierced the air, causing everything and everyone to come to a screeching stop. 

Rafael took a step toward you. “Y/N, I’m--”

“No!” you interrupted. “I can’t take it anymore. I can’t take this fighting. If you can’t behave like civilized human beings then get out!” You pushed past the small crowd that had formed and went back into the interrogation room with your mom and sister. 

Amanda clapped her hands. “Alright, guys. Show’s over.” As the crowd dispersed she went back to her desk, raising her brow in a manner that said, ‘Serves you boys right.’

Rafael cleared his throat and sat in an empty chair while Sonny went over to his desk. The two men were silent with Rafael staring at his phone and Sonny chugging more Pepto Bismol. Being scolded in front of the entire precinct was enough humiliation to suffer through for one day.

One hour later and the interrogation room door opened. “Is she ok?” Sonny asked Bella.

 “She was just assaulted by her ex. How do ya’ think she is?” Bella snapped.

“Bella!” your mom reprimanded before turning to her son. “Give your sister some time. She’ll come around.” She kissed his cheek and left.

The minute you came out Rafael popped up out of his chair. He had been acting like an expectant father, pacing the floor and waiting. “Do you need anything? How’d it go?”

“Ok,” you said with a shrug. “I’m gonna go home with my folks. I’ll call you later.”

Rafael nodded. A cocktail of terror, relief, and anger etched into his face. You gave him a half smile. It was the most emotion you could muster. As you walked away, both of you knew that after today your relationship would never be the same.

****

The hours may have ticked by, but for Sonny time stood still. While Rafael and the others had left, he hadn’t moved from his desk.

“What are you still doing here?” Olivia asked when she stepped out of her office, surprised to see him alone and staring off into space rather than at home.

“My family hates me,” he softly said.

Olivia sighed and pulled up a chair. “No they don’t.”

“I didn’t...I mean when I invited Theo...I never thought…” He couldn’t finish his train of thought, a lump rising in his throat which he bitterly swallowed back down. The words that Rafael spit at him earlier still stung. Although it was nothing compared to the guilt and shame he felt. 

“Hey, this is not your fault,” Olivia sternly said. “You can’t think like that.”

Sonny studied his scuffed shoes and nodded his head when he heard Theo’s voice. “Watch it will ya’! That’s police brutality!” 

“Keep moving,” Fin said, leading your ex-fiance into the precinct with Amanda following behind. 

In an instant Sonny lunged at Theo, gripping him by the collar and shoving him against the wall. “You sonofabitch!” he growled. “You attacked my little sister!” 

Fin tried to separate the two men, but he was no match for Sonny, who’s anger gave him almost superhuman strength.

“Hey! Get off me, man!” Theo exclaimed and tried to wrench free from the vice-like grip his friend had on him. 

Sonny slammed Theo’s head into the wall again, so hard that it practically vibrated around the room. “I trusted you with her!” 

“Someone help!” Theo shouted. It took several officers to get Sonny off him.

“Ya’ know, I could sue the NYPD for this,” Theo said as he was led to the cage.

Amanda rolled her eyes. “Yeah, go ahead and try that after you’re found guilty of assault and attempted rape.”

Before Olivia or anyone else could reprimand Sonny for his behavior, he grabbed his jacket and left, unable to stand being in the same room as your attempted rapist. 

****

Not wanting to be alone in your apartment, you ended up spending the night at your parents’ house. As you laid in bed in your childhood bedroom, staring up at old boyband posters, you thought of Theo. How many memories you had shared in this room. From endless games of Bop-It when you were kids to sneaky makeout sessions during your teen years, always ready to split apart in case your mom came barging in. 

It was amazing how much life had changed since then. How much Theo had changed. From the sweet innocent boy next door to a conniving monster. Perhaps that evil streak was always in him, kept well hidden in the darkest corners of his being, but over time became more difficult to conceal. Until today when that mask he wore so well, fell and revealed his true self.

As hard as it was, you tried not to waste too much energy thinking about the happenings of today, especially when you had Rafael. You tried to call him several times that night, but every attempt ended with your thumb hovering over the call button before eventually giving up. 

You didn’t know what to say, and in reality you didn’t want to say anything. You wanted to go back to when life was simpler. To when life was easy. But there was no going back, so instead you shoved your phone under the pillow and tried to sleep.

*****

Since you had never called Rafael, you weren’t too surprised to find him standing outside your apartment building the next morning when Teresa dropped you off. “Want me to go in with you?” she asked.

“No, that’s ok. I need to speak to Rafael in private.” 

As you stepped out of the car, Teresa smiled and waved at your boyfriend. “Poor bastard,” she muttered to herself.

“Hi,” Rafael said,

“Hi,” you replied. “What are you doing here?” 

“You didn’t call last night so I came to check on you.” He followed you inside and into the elevator. You wanted to scream at him to stop being so damn nice, to stop making this harder than it had to be, but instead you were silent. 

When you got to your door, you hesitated. What if Theo was in there. Of course, you knew that was nonsensical. Fin and Amanda had arrested him last night; however, that did nothing to quell your fear.

Noticing your reluctance, Rafael spoke up, “Do you want me to check?”

“No,” you said before sighing in defeat. “Yes, please.” You waited outside for several minutes before he came out and gave you the all clear.

Rafael had intended to spend the day doing whatever you wanted to do whether that was to sit and talk or just to hold you while you cried. Instead, he followed you into your bedroom and watched you pull out a suitcase and begin to pack.

“What are you doing?” he asked.

“Packing,” you replied. Rafael crossed his arms and arched his brow, not in the mood for your sarcasm, especially since he was up all night worried sick. “I’m taking off work for a while so I’m going over to my sister’s place. I can’t stay here alone right now.”

Rafael followed you around the bedroom like a lost puppy as you moved from the dresser to the bathroom and back. “You can stay at my place if you want.”

“You have work,” you said.

“I know, but I can easily work from home right now if you need me.” He sauntered up behind you and started to massage your shoulders only to have you jump a mile high and flinch away from his touch.

“I’m sorry,” he said and immediately stepped away from you. As you continued to stuff your suitcase, Rafael began to get a funny feeling deep in the pit of his stomach. A premonition that something was coming. “Are you ok?”

You began to shake and it was only after a moment that Rafael realized it was because you were laughing. “Am I ok?” Your laugh grew stronger until it was maniacal. “I was just assaulted!  My family is falling apart! My life is falling apart! I am not ok!” 

You grabbed a photo of your family from your nightstand and threw it as hard as you could, watching it hit the wall and fall to the ground, the glass shattering. It felt good to unleash your anger, addicting almost. Your hand trembled from the adrenaline. Soon you were tearing apart your bedroom: throwing clothes, tugging the curtains off their rods, knocking a vase and art books off your dresser. Rafael stood there in silence while you had your tantrum, figuring you needed to release your pent up emotions after such a harrowing experience.

Once you had exhausted yourself, you collapsed on the bed out of breath. “I think we should take a break.”

At your admission, Rafael’s heart stopped. “Excuse me?”

“I think we should take a break,” you repeated. 

Rafael felt completely blindsided. He had expected there would be some tough times ahead given Theo and the assault, but he was not prepared for this. “Why?”

You let out a breath and hoped Rafael would understand. “I need to be on my own right now,” you explained. “I need space to clear my head and battle my demons. I need to learn how to take care of this myself.”

“We take care of each other. That’s what a relationship is.”

“What about work? I saw the looks of the squad’s faces when they realized we were together.”

Your words sliced through Rafael, exposing his deepest insecurities. “I thought you didn’t care what people thought about us,” he quietly said.

Unable to face him and see the pain in his eyes, you focused on tugging a hangnail instead. “I don’t, but I don't want to ruin your career and if we’re together that’s exactly what I’m going to do.”

There was silence between you both as Rafael tried to process your words. He ran a hand over his face and braced himself against the wall before kneeling down in front of you. “This is just temporary, right? Things will calm down and then we’ll be back together.”

You shrugged. “Maybe. I’m not sure. To be honest I’m not sure of anything right now.”

Rafael scoffed. “Let me guess, this is one of those ‘Don’t call me, I’ll call you’ kind of things, right?”

“That’s not fair,” you mumbled.

“I’m sorry. I just...I was willing to fight for us. To fight for you. I thought you felt the same way. But I was very very wrong.” Having nothing more to say, Rafael stood up and left.

You remained sitting on the bed, listening to his footsteps move down the hall, farther and farther away. It was only when you heard the door close that you gave yourself permission to cry. 

Not wanting to be in this place another minute, you grabbed your suitcase and left, leaving your bedroom a disaster. Teresa was waiting for you outside. You stuffed your suitcase in the back of her car and hopped into the passenger seat. “Wanna talk about it?” she asked when she noticed you crying.

You shook your head and looked out the side view mirror as she drove away. Through your tears you could’ve sworn you saw Rafael walking down the street, his figure getting smaller and smaller until he blended in with the crowd and then there was nothing.

Tag List:

@glimmerglittergirl @southern-magnolia @sweetcannolicarisi @dreamlover31 @obfuscateyummy @sass-and-suspenders​ @eclecticminded @thatesqcrush @katmstanton @amirightcounsellor @beltzboys2015-blog​ @letty-o @sonnysdoll @lyssa1385 @sweetsummertime99 @burningsorr0ws @gibbs274 @izzythefanfreak @babypink224221 @livxrafa @esparza-army @obsessionprofessional @ottosuricato @mgarner1227 @dreila03 @tropes-and-tales @thecraziestcrayon @goodluckfindingone @scarletsoldierrr @youreverycolor @yeah-boiiiiiiiiiii @imagine-all-the-imagines @imjustreallynosy @graniairish @ashley-chi @lolacolaempath @cocomel0613 @mysterioustrashadventures @that-girl-named-alex @scapricciatello @mrsrafaelbarba @zizzlekwum @katierpblogg @crowleysqueenofhell @garturbo @rachelxwayne @averyhotchner @sarcastically-defensive17 @permanentlydizzy @beccabarba @infiniteoddball @ritajammer21

#rafael barba #rafael barba fanfic #rafael barba fic #rafael barba x reader #rafael barba imagine #barba #barba imagine #barba fic #barba x reader #sonny carisi imagine #sonny carisi x reader #sonny carisi #sonny carisi fic #law and order svu fic #law and order svu imagine #taking chances

[burnedbyshoto]

memories

— Shouto loses his memories, and you can’t do anything but watch as your world falls apart. —

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pairing: todoroki shouto x reader

warning: angst, fluff, cursing

word count: 8,459

a/n: so, I promised i had an amazing idea for an angsty angst, and this is it. I really don’t know how to outdo this. good luck, I cried while writing it :) also italics means its a memory

message to join tag list

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“You need to get here now.”

There were moments in life where things felt like time had slowed down. Moments where you felt like you were moving at an average pace, and yet nothing else was keeping up with you. As a hero, you had these moments on the field, these moments had saved your life countless times, and it was all apart of the adrenaline corroding your veins, but you never experienced it outside the fact. There was no horror when a villain was shooting at you a hundred miles a second, but those words sent ice down your back. Those words held nothing but fear, worry, and pity.

The landline phone dropped from your hands, and it fell in slow motion, your hands grabbing your things, and the door slamming closed behind you. There was nothing but a clattering silence of the phone on the floor and the shuddering door when you left.

The house you left would never be the same, your home would never be the same.

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“Where is he?!”

Sweat poured down your face, your chest hammering when you entered the waiting room. You hadn’t asked where the room was, or where he was, the call had told you that they were waiting on the eighth floor, ignoring the yells of the nurses you clamored up the stairs like an animal.

There were so many people, people you recognized, people you didn’t, but they were all here for him. It was evident in what they wore, in how they gave you the most regretful look. Your throat tightened, your head shaking when Midoriya approached you. 

“He’s in the OR right now,” he says calmly, a soft smile on his face, but you know Midoriya too well. You see how the smile doesn’t light up his green eyes, nor does his voice speak with his usual tone. This was his hero’s voice, the voice he used to calm down victims who had just gone through trauma. “We got here just in time.”

“Don’t bullshit me,” you whisper, your body quivering. Fear was consuming you, making you unhinged, and ready to attack. “What happened to Shouto?”

With a gentle push, Midoriya sat you down on a leather chair, and he slowly explained what had happened.

Severe head trauma. A villain with a quirk that could manipulate the brain’s functionality had attacked Midoriya, Bakugou, and Shouto with the intent to destroy the hero lifestyle. They hadn’t seen a civilian, and the villain took it to his advantage. Shouto had intercepted what should have been a life-ending attack, and now you were sitting in a waiting room with a blanket on your lap that provided no warmth waiting for the OR light to turn off. He needed to live, he had to live.

One hour of waiting turned into twelve hours.

It was now four in the morning, and everyone in the waiting room had fallen asleep. Fuyumi, who had shown up shortly after her school was out, was leaning her head on your shoulder as she slept. You hadn’t eaten in that time, the water bottle in your hand barely touched, and your eyes concentrated on the light, unblinking, unmoving. 

“Are you okay?” A voice grumbles. It was Bakugou who most likely hadn’t been able to fall asleep as well. It was thick with needed slumber, uneven with the lack of use.

Your head nodded, your attention still on the light.

“It’s been hours,” you whisper, and you swallow a lump in your throat, more tears threatening to spill over your waterline. “I don’t want them to walk out and see looks of defeat. I want… fuck, I didn’t get to see Shouto. What if this is it? What if I don’t see him again?”

“Don’t fucking talk like that,” he snaps, but his tone isn’t as strong as it usually is. It’s filled with pity, and it hurts your heart even more so. “That bastard won’t die as long as you two have a fucking future together. He’s stronger than that, and you know it, so stop fucking sulking. He’s going to make it.”

There’s a weak laugh, and you roll your head to the side, your eyelids feeling heavy.

“You say that like I-I’m his only reason for living.”

“You might as well fucking be with how much he never shuts up about you,” Bakugou groans. “It’s goddamn disgusting.”

Those words would be reassuring any other day, but right now, they pushed the final bits of your emotions over the edge, and you begin to cry again. You sit there, tears streaming down your face, uncaring about what Bakugou would say about it. You didn’t want things to end between you and Shouto, especially not in this way. Not when the two of you spent countless nights talking about your future, planning a life together that seemed disastrously picture perfect. But it was fun imagining the life you could have together, especially since Shouto agreed with every stupid little thing you said.

“I don’t want to lose him,” you plea to anyone and anything that would listen and help you.

The light turned off.

Your body jerked up, your voice letting out a squeak that seemed to remain trapped in your throat. Fuyumi grunted at your side, and through the corner of your eyes, you saw Bakugou stand up too. 

Walking out of the room, a team of doctors walked out. Fatigue heavy in their steps, exhaustion evident on their faces. 

“I’m assuming you’re here for patient Todoroki,” the surgeon you assumed was heading the case spoke; a tired and tight-lipped smile on his face. “He’s going to make it, but there was significant head trauma. We do not know what the boundaries are from it, we are waiting for him to wake up, but he’ll be in his room now.”

Relief flooded your body, drowning you quickly, and you crumbled to the floor weeping. He was okay.

He was alive.

Shouto was still here.

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You sat at Shouto’s bedside.

His eyes were closed, shut to the world around him. His red and white hair was shaggier now, his current hairstyle pressed into his eyelids. The scar on his eye even looked paler on his body, and he looked malnourished. But he was alive, he was here.

Your hand held onto his, your thumb stroked his knuckles. He had been asleep for about a week now, he had been waking up for about two minutes every ten hours to eat and drink something. You had only been here to see it once, the other times you had been at work. You, unfortunately, couldn’t get yourself time off to be here with Shouto, at least not until he needed help at home. 

You sighed, your head pressing into the mattress of the hospital bed. You were bored and tired, the emotional toll of this situation was really hitting hard, but you needed to stay awake just in case he woke up for good. 

“Hi, y/n-chan,” a quiet yet warm voice spoke from the doorway. Your head shot up to see Rei standing there. A basket of fruit in her hands, and a warm and weathered smile on her face. Her white hair was twisted up, her clothes fresh and pressed. She looked much more put together than you were at the moment. 

“Rei-san,” you greeted, you stood up, bowing at your boyfriend’s mother, who then embraced you in a hug.

The two of you talked silently, and you gave Rei the seat by Shouto’s side, her hands gently holding onto his forearm as she spoke. You discussed how things were going on at work. How you were feeling about this situation, and you did the same with her. She explained that Natsuo and Fuyumi would be joining her later, and if you wanted to join them for dinner afterward, that was highly encouraged.

You smiled widely, your body at ease while you talked with Rei, her soothing aura helping you in this time of need despite it being her son. She relayed stories of Shouto as a child, tales you weren’t that familiar with since Shouto had no recollection of them. They helped your aching soul.

“M-Mom?”

The two of you froze, and both your attentions were drawn to Shouto. His eyes were barely cracked open, the grey and turquoise color burning into you despite their attention, not on you. Shouto’s eyes closed, a grunt escaping his lips, and he shifted in the bed. 

“Hi, Shoucchan,” Rei gasped, her mouth filling with a watery grin, and your heart pounded in your ears. He was awake.

Not wanting to intrude on Shouto taking notice of his mom first, you hit the red button to inform the nurses of Shouto being awake and cognitive. There’s a warmth in your body again, happiness leaking into your veins at the knowledge that Shouto was back. Staying quiet, you stood up, seeing nurses and doctors coming towards the room. Charts and data in their hands.

“What are y-you doing here?”

“You’re hurt in the hospital, why wouldn’t I be here?”

You let the medic team in, but there was something that Shouto said that made you freeze. His voice is raspy, nearly unusable from three weeks of no use, but there is no hint of a lie in his tone.

“Because… you’re supposed to be in a hospital, too.”

“What?”

Staring at Shouto, your eyebrows scrunched together, and your head tilted. Shouto finally took his gaze to you, his eyes cold, uncaring, unknowing.

“Who the hell are you?”

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“It’s traumatic amnesia,” the doctor sighed, his fingers pinching the bridge of his nose. “We noticed a slight swell in the hippocampus area when doing the surgery, but it wasn’t anything abnormal for concussed patients.”

Your eyes trailed from the doctor to the window in Shouto’s room. A group of nurses was administering a set of tests. Examining where he was cognitively, physically, and emotionally. 

“Despite what you may think, amnesia is rare. There are less than five cases for every 100,000 individuals, and most cases involve patients in higher ages. Patient Todoroki is still young, and a skilled hero at that… there’s no saying in what will happen.”

They spoke, but their words were barely registering in your mind. Your attention was too focused on Shouto. Too worried and stressed about what was to happen from here on out.

Shouto’s face was reminiscent of your high school days, reserved, quiet, and with underlying displaced anger. He was ignorant to the way the nurses stared at his body, the lingering touches, and the most obvious flirting. His shirt had been removed for whatever reason, and while he was still muscular, he was thinner.

“Do you have a sense as to where he is with his memories?” Rei asked, her hands clasping tightly together, worry and discomfort heavy in her features.

“Well, considering that he didn’t recognize Y/l/n-san, I’m going to say that he can only seem to remember up until he was fifteen.”

Fifteen.

You met Shouto when you were fifteen. He was a whole other person, someone that no longer existed. But you were now twenty-three, the world finally being made to your manipulation, not the will of others. So much had changed between then and now; all you knew is that you were a stranger to him.

He was a stranger to you.

“But it is traumatic amnesia,” the doctor smiled, a smile gesture of confidence and hope. “Most individuals will always regain their full memory, and better yet, there are things you can do to get him back into the flow of things.”

“What do we need to do?” Rei inquired, a palpable tension melting off her body.

You froze when Shouto’s eyes locked on yours, his eyes were unwavering, almost challenging you to look away. It made your stomach twist, habits from his fifteen-year-old self were foreign and strange on him now. It made your eyes drop, and you turned towards the doctor and Rei, who were looking at you expectantly. 

“I-I’m sorry,” you apologized, your eyesight falling to your feet. “I didn’t hear that last part.”

“We think that a good thing for restoring his memories is having him go through his normal routine, outside of his workdays at least. Having him stay in his regular space, hanging out with his usual friends, eating the same things. To refamiliarize himself with what he was familiar with. It can help unlock those memories.”

You nodded your head, your throat clearing.

“I can do that.”

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“Welcome home,” you spoke, throwing open the door to the apartment that you and Shouto shared together. Despite everything, he didn’t trust you in the slightest.

He refused to speak to you unless necessary. He didn’t ask you questions, he refused to let you explain anything to him, and he didn’t like walking ahead of you. He was cautious, calculating, and deadly. You weren’t used to having him on the defensive with you, and to be honest, you hated the way he seemed to view you as a threat.

But on the other hand, you didn’t blame him.

He thought he was fifteen years old, it was cruel to wake up suddenly eight years older to people that would never be in his room, to begin with. But even if your rationality told you to not care, it still stung when he refused to be at ease around you. 

“This is our place,” you explained, your hands showing off the decorated hallway. 

The walls were filled with photos of you and him, friends, family, and all achievements. There was no order to it, only uncontrolled chaos because when you first started arranging them, Shouto had messed up. Somehow he had destroyed the lineout you had explained to him, and as you howled with laughter while he attempted to make the disastrous arrangement better, he had also begun to crack with laughter. 

The presentation of the pictures was in no way shape or form beautiful, it was ugly and chaotic, but the two of you loved it. You remember crying into his shirt, your laughter overwhelming you, and Shouto barely keeping you on your feet because he too was weak with laughter. You didn’t stand a chance the second his mouth pressed against yours. That night the two of you agreed to keep the disastrous presentation up, and the giggles of the event could be heard for miles. 

“Is it supposed to look like that? It’s ugly,” Shouto surmised, his eyes focused on the pictures, and you felt your heart drop. 

Oh.

“It was a creative choice,” you smile in response, trying to not ruin the good memory with this one. You placed your bag on the kitchen table, taking out the pills that Shouto was supposed to take daily. “Um, I’ll show you around.”

So the two of you walked around the apartment. You explained where everything was, your hands opening a countless number of drawers telling where plates, cups, bowls, and utensils were. You showed Shouto the cabinets with the food and the closets where you stored winter clothes. The bathroom came; next, you showed him what shampoo he used, the conditioner he had, and the body wash he liked. You pointed out his toothbrush and toothpaste, then pulled out a razor and scissors.

The bedroom was last. 

You pushed open the door to the bed that sat in the middle of the room. It was neatly made, with your things flowing over onto Shouto’s side of the bed. The restless week of not having him here and caused many a night of you curled onto his side of the bed, falling asleep to his scent that was ingrained into his pillow. 

You slept on the left side of the bed, and Shouto slept on the right. It was a decision the two of you made months before you officially moved in together. You both had argued about wanting the left side, and both of you were stubborn as fuck. You remember staring him down, your point of being the little spoon far more often than he was your most strong point. 

~ You both enjoyed to lay onto your left shoulder; with you on the left side, it would allow for the most exceptional comfort for both of you. You remember wagging your finger in front of his face, and him swatting it out of the way, his nose scrunched from your hard jabs to his face. It was then that he grabbed your wrist and pulled you into his chest. You screamed, his body falling onto the mattress, and you landed on his chest. Your hands pressed against his warm chest, and he looked fondly up at you. 

“I’ll take the right side, only if you kiss me goodnight every night,” he whispered, his fingers brushing through your hair. “And if you promise to sleep like this on occasion. Cuddling makes my arm go numb.”

Your face evolved into a face splitting smile, and you nodded, pressing a kiss to his lips.

“I promise.” ~

“I would never sleep on the right side,” he inputted, walking towards the right side of the bed. His eyes taking in every detail presented on the nightstand. “This room is a bit messy, and I don’t like the western style to it.”

Your eyes fluttered, the forgotten memories of the traditional Japanese style he used to replicate immediately popping back into your head.

“Oh, um… if it makes things easier for you, we can put in a futon?” You try to compromise, your chest tightening at the fact that he hated the layout. You knew it wasn’t him saying it, but it was him. It used to be him. 

Did he always hate things like this and just chose not to tell you anything?

Shaking your head, you suppressed the insecurities that ate away at you, there was no point in fretting over his opinions that no longer held. This was him as a fifteen-year-old, he was no longer this person. 

“We decided on that a while ago,” you reasoned, your arms folding across your chest, and you watched with curious eyes when he turned towards you and began walking towards you.

By instinct and pure muscle memory, your arms stretched up, ready to embrace him in a hug. But the look of confusion, distrust, and dislike that filled his face made you retract back into yourself, an acidic taste at the back of your throat. When they said to introduce him to his old routine, you had no idea how much of his old method you were supposed to enforce.

Good-morning kisses? The late-night cuddles? Were you supposed to be intimate at all? Or just some background character ordering him around, erasing and ignoring his autonomy, the autonomy that made him want to be anywhere but here it seemed. 

“What time do I go to bed?” He asks, his hands slipping into his pockets. His gaze was unnerving, a chilling reminder of the familiar stranger before you. “What time do I wake up? Do I still train in the mornings?”

You swallowed the prickle in your throat, your fingers brushing aside your hair, and you nodded your head. “You’re always in bed by midnight when you don’t have work the next day, but the time you actually sleep varies from midnight to four in the morning. You wake up whenever you feel like it, but are always out of bed by eleven. And on occasion, you work out in the morning, although you can’t be doing anything too crazy yet.”

Shouto didn’t seem impressed. 

“If you have any questions, you know you’re more than welcomed to ask me.”

“I know,” he answers, his hand pushing through his hair, his shoulders shrugging. “I just don’t see how I can trust you with anything. Besides, I don’t see how I could be attracted to you.”

There were moments in life where you could feel your soul being crushed to a powder, and this was by far the hardest thing you’ve experienced.

“It’s truly a mystery,” you smile, thin-lipped and stiff. “But I do understand how this can be a complete shock, and that it’s a lot. We all have different coping methods, and that’s okay. You very obviously do not like me, and that’s okay… the regular routine of your sleeping schedule does include me sleeping with you, but since you don’t… l-like me, I’ll take the couch…”

You didn’t wait for a response, your head dropping low so that your hair covered your eyes, and you pulled out your pajamas with no issues. The room was silent, the squeaking floorboards and sliding drawers being the only noise echoing in the room. As you left the room, your voice called out one more time.

“Goodnight.”

The couch was comfy thankfully, and as you changed into your pajamas out in the open, uncaring if Shouto walked out, not that he would, you remembered the night before the injury.

~ You sat on the couch, your knees tucked under your chin, your fingers punching the channel button, desperately trying to find something to watch. 

“You find anything yet?” Shouto asked, and you groaned when he chose to sit beside you, his hands dragging you onto his lap. You giggled, burying your head into his neck, a noise escaping your lips, telling him that you had not found anything to watch. “Mm, that sucks.”

Scoffing, you pulled away from him, your nose scrunched up at him, “It’s not my fault there’s so much on. What if I pick the wrong movie and watch something lame without my consent?”

“We can read the reviews before selecting anything then. To really get a feeling as to what we’re watching.”

You hum, the corners of your lips twitching up into a coy smile. You continued to fondly stare at him, and you brought him in for a sweet kiss. 

The remote in your hand was quickly forgotten, and you rejoiced when he returned your sweet kiss with much more passion than you had asked for. His fingers held your waist, massaging soft circles into your exposed skin. Your noises were breathless, and soon enough, you found yourself being pressed onto the couch, your eyes fluttering open when his intoxicating mouth left yours.

“Fuck,” he sighs, his fingers brushing your hair out of your face. “You’re beautiful.”

“Shouto,” you groan, your face feeling like it was on fire, and you tried to bring him back down to resume kissing. You knew he had work tomorrow, so you wanted to live the best of the dying time together.

“No, really,” he insists, his finger gently caressing your cheeks. You felt frozen while you looked up at him, “You’re breathtaking. You’re strong, kind, resilient, an amazing person, and you fuck me up in the best way, y/n. I love how you always eat hot soup and will cry for minutes afterward for scalding your tongue, I love when you come home from a long day at work and just fall on your face. I love when you join me in the shower just to make the worlds longest bubble mohawk, and when you come over for lunch during weeks where we hardly have one on one time… I love you so much.”

There was a small whimper that escaped your lips, tears clouding your vision, and you laughed.

“Kiss me, you idiot.” ~

You gasped for air, silent sobs wrecking your body, and you held your arms around you. The words he used to attack you earlier, corroded your soul and left the taste of bile on your tongue. You had him back, but this wasn’t him. Where was he? 

When were you going to get your Shouto back?

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“WELCOME BACK!”

Your smile grew when you looked at your friends who popped out from behind the wall. Well, at least the ones who would do that, Bakugou and Tokoyami remained sitting on their seats, but they at least expressed their versions of excitement to seeing you and Shouto walk in. 

It was seven days after Shouto had been released from the hospital, but the relationship between the two of you had not improved even a drop. He didn’t trust you, his eyes hardening whenever you attempted to instruct him around. But you knew that the curiosity of who he was had caught up, but he refused to ask you these questions. Shouto asked every question he had online, resulting to gossip tabloids and youtube videos to figure out who he was.

The only thing he had asked you was the truth about his fire: if he actually did use it. You had been sitting on the couch, your blankets and pillows scattered everywhere. The sofa was comfortable, and all, but your body craved to be curled up by his side, not here. You responded with a straight face that he did use his fire. But it wasn’t an answer he wanted to hear, his upper lip curling into a snarl before he turned onto his heel and left.

But it was a week now, a week of Shouto being cognitively functional. The doctors assured you that this was not abnormal to keep Shouto on this routine. However, it was easier said than done, primarily when Shouto had managed to get his body back to normal in six days and now wanted to start training again.

For now, and with the suggestion of the doctor, you brought him somewhere outside of his typical routine. A Class 1-A hot pot dinner!

You embraced your fellow classmates, your smile tight, your answers avoidant when they asked on how your relationship was going. It didn’t matter how it was going; after all, if this was temporary, you could handle this cold attitude. You knew he would apologize for it, but you had to remain resilient. 

You sat down between Mina and Uraraka, the two girls holding your elbows, trying to extract as much information out of you as they could. Their words fall deaf on your ears though, your attention focused on the way that Shouto quickly talks with Momo, Midoriya, and Bakugou. His face is no longer convoluted with that underlying anger; you did nothing to ease, and there’s a small smile on his face.

Just because the man before you wasn’t the same man you knew didn’t mean you couldn’t read him like a book still. He was happy, genuinely happy. There was no fear, no hesitation, no suspicion.

There was something bitter that flashed through you; jealousy and corrupt sadness flooded your veins at the way Shouto stared at Momo, who laughed easily. You recognized that stare on Shouto without a doubt, and your shoulders deflated a bit, your focus returning back onto the two girls beside you.

“Y/n!”

“I’m sorry,” you laugh, your body battling the tears that threaten to pool in your eyes. “I didn’t catch that…”

“We asked if he has fallen back head over heels for you again!” Mina asked, her voice at her usual volume, but worry and pity were biting at her tone.

“Yeah, the last time we got hot pot as a whole group, the two of you had announced you were dating!”

It was as if that unlocked a memory from you, as if you were the amnesia patient and not Shouto, and you recalled that night a few years ago. 

~ “Hi,” you croak with a smile, your hand holding Shouto’s. Somehow the two of you were the last to arrive, and your fingers began to sweat when your nineteen friends zeroed in on your hand in Shouto’s. Despite your instinct to immediately tear your hand away from his, Shouto held your hand tighter, his thumb tracing your knuckles.

“We’re dating,” Shouto announced a smile on his face that was directed at you.

You bit down on your lip, your gaze moving to meet his, and you snort shoving him with your shoulder. But your old class explodes in screams, arms grabbing you away from Shouto despite his best efforts to keep you near. Hands hold your arms, and you’re suddenly sitting down between Uraraka and Mina, who are screaming for details.

But you look up at where Shouto is. He’s talking with Momo, Midoriya, and Bakugou, his cheeks slightly tinted, and there’s a smile on his face. You feel frozen when he looks over at you, his eyes glowing with thoughts only you could understand, and your smile grows.

“Y/n!”

“Sorry!” you laugh, your stomach flipping with butterflies after you break the gaze with your boyfriend. “I didn’t catch that, what did you ask?” ~

The memory played with your emotions, your shoulders tensing when everyone sat down.

‘He’s happy right now, he’s happy right now, he’s happy right now,’ you mentally chanted, your fingers gripping the skirt of your outfit. You sighed, looking at your friends while Shouto took the seat across from Uraraka. 

“Everything’s going well, the heads over heels thing is still a work in progress, haha!”

Fortunately, they don’t press more, Kaminari throwing open the door exclaiming that the dishes were being brought over. But this was a good day, this was a day where Shouto could learn more, and see just how amazing your friends were. You wouldn’t ruin this night because his amnesic ass couldn’t remember who you were and treated you differently due to things not being the same. Eight years changed people, and you couldn’t expect eight years of growth in a matter of seven days. 

Grabbing your chopsticks, you faked a bright grin when Kirishima yelled out praise. And so, for the second time at this restaurant, you watched the servers jaw drop to the ground when they saw the twenty-one accomplished Pro Heroes acting like the children you all were. But despite your best attempt to kid around with your friends, you struggled to remain positive.

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Two Weeks Later

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You weren’t sure how to explain how things were going.

After the dinner with your friends, Shouto had finally begun to talk to you regularly. He would sit as far away as possible, his arms folded, his gaze averting every few seconds before returning to you. His questions were often surface level and sometimes went more profound than you thought was possible.

He asked about his life outside of you, mostly. Asking for more insight into why he finally decided to use his fire, how he felt towards his family when his mother made a full recovery and particular friendships with the old class. 

You did your best to give him the most honest answers, and sometimes you felt like some all-knowing creature with the way he looked at you. It was reminiscent of a child asking an elder things, curious, challenging, unsure. It made you uncomfortable, you just wanted your boyfriend back, but he wasn’t there yet. 

At three weeks out of the hospital, he could now recall his memories up until the sports festival during your first year. It was a definite improvement place. It helped him to feel at ease, but not enough where you could feel like you had your boyfriend back, much less your best friend back. And it was an improvement that was made not because of you, but because of someone else — Momo and Midoriya in particular. But it was Sunday night, and you sat on the couch, your fingers flipping the page of the book in your hand. 

How you wished your life was a novel, all it took was a love confession, a kiss of true love to break the spell between lovers who had forgotten people. But these novels weren’t written with a lover who had a terrible childhood, who held animosity towards something you no longer knew how to fight.

There was the creaking of the floorboards, and you tore your attention from the book to see Shouto placing a suitcase onto the floor. His face was neutral, and your heart stopped beating when he walked over to you. 

He sat on the couch opposing you, his hands resting on his knees.

“I’m going to be moving out,” he informed you, and your will crumbled like that. “It’s not that I haven’t appreciated everything you’ve done because it’s been a lot… but I don’t see how I became the man you talk about. It’s hard to talk to you or be around you because you look at me like I’m doing this on purpose.”

You watch on silently, your gaze falling, your eyebrows scrunching. You couldn’t think, were you always that obvious?

“I-I’m sorry,” you mumble, your hands placing your book onto the coffee table. “Um… is there anything I can do for you? Are you moving in with anyone?”

Shouto stared at you, his own eyebrows scrunching, but while yours scrunched in the act of sadness, his was in irritation.

“Get mad at me,” he says.

“I can’t,” you respond.

“I’ve made your life hard for an entire fucking month,” he snaps, his eyes raging yet cold. “You clearly are in love with me, or this person I used to be, and I’m not him! Why don’t you speak what’s on your mind? Tell me when I’m doing things wrong?! Why did you take the couch and never once ask for the bed back? It’s your bed, is it not?”

You shake your head, your heart now pounding so quickly you felt dizzy. This was not happening, this couldn’t be happening.

“It’s not, it’s—”

“Ours.” 

He says that in time with yours, and your hands clench into fists. 

“I don’t love you. I’m sorry if that’s harsh, or rude, but I don’t. You’re the only person I haven’t been able to click within the beginning the same way I have with others. I haven’t had an issue being friends with other people, so tell me why you’re the only one I can’t even be friends with? It’s pathetic of you to be so insistent on this passive way of approaching me. Because right now, I don’t even value you as a friend. So it just brings me to question if I really loved you?!”

“You did!” You spat, your chest trembling with suppressed rage and sorrow. He had pushed you too much, he went too far, and now you would not be helpful. Your love was real, even if he refused to see it now, it was real, and it was true. “You loved me as much as I loved you! I didn’t ever want to push anything because I don’t know what to do with this situation! I researched everything I could to help you, but everything I did was useless, it was pointless. I get that I’ve been walking on eggshells around you, but what was I supposed to do?! Would you have let me go up to you and hug you whenever I fucking felt like it? How about kiss you?! Would you have seriously let me just hop onto your lap and make out with you whenever I needed distractions?! How would you have reacted if I asked to sleep curled into your chest when you don’t even like me? Or what if I wanted to shower with you in the morning? Or a casual conversation? Because whenever I tried to be just a friend to you, you rejected me! What about fucking sex, Shouto?! Would you have let me fuck you? No, you wouldn’t have! You think this is so fucking hard because you don’t have your memories, but I don’t have my safe zone anymore. I don’t have the person I need the most in my life anymore! I recognize you, I can still read you like a goddamn book, but there’s no p-point because I don’t understand it.”

Your chest is heaving, tears overflowing in your eyes.

“Well, what was I supposed to do?” He asks, his eyes ablaze. “I woke up thinking I was fifteen years old, and you had this puppy sick emotion on your face from the first moment. How could I say no to you? Whenever I denied you things, you looked ready to cry. You should’ve just accepted that I’m not the same person that I was and tried to work from there. You’re the one stuck in the past, stuck on this person I’m clearly not anymore. I’m not going to pretend to be someone I’m not, so do us both a favor and move on.”

“Go fuck yourself, Todoroki,” you hiss, standing up, tears flowing down your blazing cheeks. “I did this because I love you, there is nothing in this goddamn world that I loved more than you. Yeah, I know you don’t want to hear it because emotions make your fifteen-year-old mindset split. Because you don’t 'deserve love and other bullshit excuses.' You don’t recognize who I know you because it took years of fucking work to get you there. It wasn’t a goddamn overnight process. But don’t let me keep you from going, fucking leave this place. I’ll move on just fine, I’ll be just peachy keen. We haven’t been lovers for more than a month, and even though I prayed to whatever I could that you’d wake up from this bullshit one day, I see that it’s probably not going to happen… I love you, I always will, but I can’t do this. I will not be talked to this way, nor will I be attacked in such ways. You’re a victim of some bullshit, but that gives you no fucking right to be an asshole! I hope that you don’t remember anything so that I don’t have to listen to some bullshit apology from you l-later. So do us both a fucking favor and leave.”

There’s only silence, and then a scoff broke it.

You remain frozen in place when Shouto gathers his things and storms out of the apartment, the slamming door echoing in your residence. You lost it then, your wails pouring out of your mouth as you sank to the ground. You lost him.

Your sobs wracked your body until you passed out on the couch, tears, and sorrow staining your face.

When you woke up, your body was in pain. Your neck screaming in pain from the awkward angle it was in. You pushed up off the couch, your body screaming at you, but you could care less, your heart hurt more.

Staggering to your room, you felt odd when you collapsed onto your bed. It had been so long since you lay here, and the scent of his body on the sheets comforted you in the most bittersweet way. Moving your hand, you felt a weird lump in the sheets.

Grunting, you moved the sheets to reveal a small present made out to you. It was from Shouto, and by the looks of it, it was before the injury. Rolling your eyes, you opened the box that fit in the palms of your hands.

Your breathing stopped when you pulled out a delicate crane ornament. It was two interlinked cranes that you had told Shouto you had absolutely loved when window shopping one day, and there it was, delicately resting on your fingers. It hurt more. You hated this. Your fingers pulled out the next object in the box, and your fingers trembled, you sobs caught in your throat at the sight of the shiny engagement ring.

It was a ring you had described to him during a drunken discussion, and it was perfect. You couldn’t keep from crying more, the realization that this was the reason that Shouto left. He left because he was a coward; you knew that now, but you understood entirely now, even if you didn’t agree with it.

What had you done?

What did you do?

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One Week Later

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Shouto walked around the mostly empty streets of Japan, his hands shoved into his jacket while he strolled. It had been a week since he left, and he could only remember the look of utter betrayal and brokenness on your face. But he had discovered the engagement ring hidden in his underwear drawer when reorganizing his clothes, and he had panicked. His memories weren’t all back. He had no recollection of you, but the idea that he had finally succumbed to someone so lovingly scared him. It worried him how his body remembered you, but his mind didn’t. He knew whenever you needed a kiss or a hug, but his mind kept him from giving you said affection.

That couldn’t be him. 

Midoriya had yelled at him for leaving you, especially with the large scene the two of you created. Now he had no idea if he wanted his memories back or not. On the one hand, he wanted to be the man you had obviously known, he wanted to do all of that stupid shit with you, but on the other hand, had he fucked up too much for you to ever forgive him. He felt guilty without his feelings, with the added knowledge of what you two were, it could be catastrophic.

But he had started his hero work again. A month after hospitalization, he was okay’d to begin working. It had genuinely helped in busying his mind during the day and night. Most days he could go the entire length without thinking of your broken expression. But it haunted him. He felt like he didn’t deserve the love you held for him. So he left.

Stopping in front of a large window, his eyes focused onto a ceramic tree with an extensive collection of glass ornaments on it. 

His eyes focused in on a prominent part of the tree, an ornament once hung but now was gone. His eyebrows scrunched when he focused in on the tree, his head tilting.

“They’re beautiful, aren’t they?!” A voice whispered to him, and Shouto snapped his head to where the sound was, only to find no one there.

Wait…

A memory crashed through him.

~ Your hands clutched together, your smile wide while you pointed at the delicate glass cranes. They were one ornament forming a heart shape in their elegant and dainty poses; the setting sun of the day made the glass shimmer and illuminate your face. Shouto could barely tear his attention away from your face. He felt like some love-struck idiot who had barely figured out he was in love. 

Your eyes were bright, that love-struck expression on your face that always sent his heart into a soaring mess. He loved the way you rocked on your feet, a small way to show how in love with this ornament you were. But you turned suddenly towards him, and Shouto went unembarrassed when your smile only grew. You had caught him staring, and by the small fluster on your face, he was glad you did catch him.

“Ew, I just caught you staring, how embarrassing,” you tease, wrapping your arms around his neck. 

Shouto snorted, his nose brushing against yours, “No one’s ever embarrassed to look at a masterpiece.”

You groaned, but he felt the heat radiating from your face, and without so much as asking, your lips connected in a sweet embrace. He held you close, your body keeping him close, connected, and needing more. But you pulled away, your teeth pressing into your lower lip, your eyes glazed over in the way they did whenever you kissed. 

“I love you,” you mumbled, shoving him away when he chose to laugh at you instead.

“Ew, don’t touch me!” You declared loudly, moving away from his attempt to hold you. Shouto could not help the loving smile on his face while you walked away, your eyes still darting back to him, making sure that he was following after you. 

He focused on the cranes in the window, the ones you had fallen in love with, and it hit him then.

When he proposed to you, the cranes would be included.

“Catch up!” You hollered, paces ahead of him now.

Shouto sighed, rolling his eyes playfully at you. With his fingers pressing into the box that remained in his pocket for some time now, he went after you. ~

Shouto’s head pounded, memory after memory flooding into him. So many of them having to do with you, with the way that he had become a better person, a person he never thought he could manage to be with your help. His heart hammered, his breathing unstable when the reality of his actions from last week came crashing in. 

Would you forgive him?

His fingers trembled when he pulled out his phone, ready to call you a million times in an attempt to get you to hear him out. 

BOOM!

Shouto’s head snapped around, despite the migraine he was experiencing, the billowing smoke and flames made him freeze. The phone in his fingers was thrown back into his pocket. As all heroes do, he took off towards the destruction. You would still be there when he finished this.

⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆

Your body convulsed, shooting pains slamming through you in uncontrolled volume. Your eyes focused on the downed Momo, Kirishima, and Mina, your ears were ringing still from the loud explosion, and only one villain remained. His eyes wide, speaking volumes of his insanity, and his eyes a near white from the quirk enhancing drug he had taken.

As you stood, nausea slammed into you, and it took everything in you not to collapse onto your knees and throw back up. Your fists raised into a weak fighting position, your vision swimming despite your steady stance. Keep it together. Keep it together.

Your fist wiped your pounding lip, blood smearing across your dirty fist.

This was your fault.

This was your fault. 

“You heroes never know when to quit!” He roared, his arms thrown out in a manically glee. 

You saw the high energy converging back into his hands, the source of the initial blast, and you threw yourself forward, hoping to intercept this explosion with your body.

But before you could, his body was encased in ice, his hands no longer able to control the energy, and it poofed from existence. Your breathing was ragged, and your eyes followed the trail of ice to where Shouto stood, his eyes wide, staring right at you. 

It had been a hard week. With your break up and finding out that he had planned on proposing, you weren’t exactly mentally stable. Your eyes tore from his, staring at the man who had become a jagged ice statue, and you felt uneasy.

“We should be safe,” Shouto told you, and your head nodded numbly, but you didn’t believe him necessarily. “I arrested him months ago; the second you cover his hands, he’s unable to use his quirk.”

You nodded, relief flooding you. You hobbled to your downed friends, checking their pulses, grateful to see that they were alive.

Wait, months ago?!

Your head snapped back at Shouto, your eyes wide, and a broken sob poured from your mouth. 

“S-Shouto shut the fuck up… o-oh my god, do you… do you?”

“I remember,” he responded, and your knees buckled, your body falling to the floor. Relief and stricken sadness flooding your body. It didn’t take long for Shouto to be at your side again, his arms enveloping you into a warm hug. His left side was to the frozen criminal, and his right hand cooled your heated body.

You cried into his white t-shirt, your arms pulling him in, you needed him closer. 

You missed him.

“I thought I’d never see you again,” you sobbed into his neck. “I thought y-you hated me!”

“Princess,” he whispered, his hands soothing you gently, “I was afraid you’d hate me.”

Your head shook, pulling away from him, your cheeks were dirty and wet from your muddied tears. 

“I love you...”

“I love you too, y/n... so fucking much,” he whispered, and your heart soared when his hands found a home on your cheeks and drew you close.

Your eyes fluttered closed, waiting for his lips to meet yours, but a thundering scream stopped your impeding mouths. Your vision snapped over to the villain who escaped the ice, his body blue, but trembling in rage.

His hand raised, a gun in it aimed at you, and like weeks before your world slowed down. Fire exploded from the barrel of the gun, and you swore you could see the bullet whizzing towards you. But your limbs were too heavy, and your eyes clenched closed. 

But it never hit.

Thud.

“SHOUTO!!!!”

There was no call this time, no warning of what happened. All you knew is that the villain was now buried under ice. But that was the least of your worries.

Shouto’s body slumped against the floor, the most heroic save he could have mustered fulfilled. His eyes were fading, his fingers weakly tracing your face.

“No, no, no,” you sniff, your fingers pressing into the bullet wound that pierced through his chest. “Nonononono, Shouto, no! No! Please don’t — fuck! Please don’t close your eyes, baby, please don’t do this!”

Shouto remained silent, his breathing raspy, short, and shallow. The life in his eyes dimming, but the love that you craved to see for so long was there. Glowing brightly despite the lack of energy in his body.

“Baby!” You shriek, your voice growing more and more desperate. Your hands were pressed against the wound, a vain attempt at getting the bleeding to stop. “Don’t! PLEASE! Stay awake! You’ll be fine! I promise! Just please don’t close your eyes! Not yet! Please don’t go! You finally remember, and I fucking love you! I saw the engagement ring! I want to marry you! Please, you need to fight this! I love you, I love you, please don’t do this!”

Shouto’s hand fell from your face, too weak to keep it up, his blood staining your hands and costume.

“I… I love you,” he whispered. “I’m… s-sorry for what I said… you’re p-perfect… I love you.”

Your eyes widened more and more, tears pouring from your eyes as your lips collided with his cold ones. Once, twice, too many times to count.

He was gone.

There are only a few moments in time where you will indeed hear a sound of utter and complete heartbreak. On this night, this fateful night where Todoroki Shouto was reborn and died, your shattering curled screaming sobs would forever be remembered. Your love was forever, but you would never get to see it last that long.

You loved him, but he was gone.

Now the only thing left of him was in your memories.

#todoroki shouto #todoroki shoto x reader #todoroki x reader #todoroki angst #todoroki shouto x reader