#i'm watching a happy one next because i can't take too much tragedy

[rapha-reads]

Gods, I just watched Kedarnath and... I'm going to cry a little I think. Or a lot.

First of all, Sara Ali Khan is fantastic, no doubt about that.

Secondly, Sushant Singh Rajput, you are a star and you are eternally missed.

Thirdly, floods and tsunamis are one of my biggest fears and mother of gods I'm going to have nightmares. That was A LOT of water.

Fourth, the songs were so good. So, so good. Qaafirana and Jaan Nisaar and Sweetheart? Gods, take a knife directly to my chest, won't you.

Fifth, the valley is beautiful. The movie is beautiful, the settings, the story, the love, the realness of it all...

And finally, I loved it and my heart was beating so fast, and my eyes are full of tears and I'm going to go and curl up in my bed and have ten thousands feelings.

#rapha talks #rapha watches movies #kedarnath #bollywood #bollywood movies #sara ali khan #sushant singh rajput #may you rest in peace sushant #list of favourite movies #i know it's based on a real event but like i said flood and tsunamis feature heavily in my list of nightmares so i'm not going to look it u #sushant died the same way my brother's love died and this is making me really sad #i am very sad now #gorgeous movie but everything surrounding it is so so so sad #i'm watching a happy one next because i can't take too much tragedy #i want to watch another sara ali khan she's fantastic - i'm a huge fan of saif ali khan and i think i'm going to be a fan of hers too

[pablitogavii]

PLEASE I NEED A NEW STORY NOW

Counting Blessings

You practically ran to Mikky's apartment , and you needed to tell someone.

"He's so tiny..can't believe he was living inside my belly for nine months" she said playing with the little boy laid on the couch while you were sipping on some tea completely lost in thought.

"What's wrong girl??" she said and you finally snapped out of your dreamland. She could help you, but you had to tell her now.

"Umm..I..I..ne..ed..advice??" you say and she nods waiting for the question.

"Mikky..I'm..pregnant" you say touching your stomach not believing it until it finally left your lips. Now it was all true. And you were panicking more than ever!!

"Oh My God! Congratulations!! How's Pablo taking it??" she asked already knowing he doesn't know from the way my face looked. I was too scared to tell him.

"I was too scared to tell him with everything going on..I found out on the day of his injury" you explain

"And still you haven't told him?? When will you!?" she asked

"I don't know! Everything happened so fast with him..and..tomorrow is his surgery" you say

"You have to tell him tonight! It will help him tomorrow!" she said

"U sure? I don't know if it's good idea?" you say worried he might hate it deep down knowing he's not a man like that.

"He's not gonna hate it! He loves you! And this will help him overcome this tragedy that happened" she said and you smiled thinking the same thing. Maybe now he won't feel useless these eight months..

"You're right! I gotta go!" you say and she smiles as you rushed passed Frankie who yelled "say hey to Pablo for me!" before you left.

When you arrived home, Pablo was sitting at the sofa. You came in nervously playing with your sweater edges.

"Amor? You wanna sit or keep standing in front of a screen like that?" he mocked and you quickly moved sitting down in silence. Now he was intrigued.

"Que pasa? Everything ok with Mikky and the baby?" he asked and at the mention of beby your stomach literally flipped.

"Yeh..yeh..they're fine..but um P, I have something to tell you" you say and he nods waiting while lowering the volume on the tv.

"Just please don't talk to me about the surgery, I'm nervous enough.." he said with smile but you knew he was not in such a mood..at least not yet.

"No..umm..it's not about that..well it is about the next eight months..and I know it seems like the end of the world to you..but um..I..j..just..don't know how to tell you this..it's so hard" you said and Pablo started to have fear in his eyes.

"You don't love me anymore? Yeh, you love a footballer and i'm an invalid now.." he said and you shut him up with your hand as he stared at you with big eyes.

"Shut up P..I love you so much..and..I think these eight months don't have to be so horrible..b..because" you move your hand while he keeps quiet. This was it..

"I'm pregnant Pablo.." you say touching your belly and he just sits there frozen.

"I..will..be..dad?" he said and you smiled nod

"Yes, cariño..you will be papi in eight months" you moved closer kneeling in front of his legs holding his face that was covered in tears.

"You happy cariño??"you try nervously not knowing what type of tears these were.

"Of course I feel happy! You're the love of my life preciosa..now you have my baby..it's all perfect" he said as you hugged him tightly letting him cry into your shoulder.

"I'm blessed preciosa..so blessed" he said and you smiled nodding your head and kissing his the top of his.

"You shouldn't be on the floor! It's cold! Venga! Let me take you to bed preciosa.." he said and you chuckled reminding him he is the patient now but he refused to listen holding your hand and taking you to bed where he tucked you in before joining behind you to cuddle you.

"Um, preciosa..could..I?" he said referring to your belly and you smiled taking his arm and wrapping it so he touched your still invisible bump.

"It's your daddy mi amor..he's the one touching you now" you say he watched in utter love with blushed cheeks.

"What would you like to have amorcito??" he asked still touching gently and you smiled wide.

"Hm..it's a boy cariño..I know" you say to his confused face.

"Don't you find it out later??" he asked and you chuckled nodd

"Hm..it's mother's instinct..we will have little Pablito in eight months" you say looking at his brightened face. Then you turned around touching his face worried.

"Just..please..return to us P" you say to him before he kissed your lips lovingly with much force.

"I promise..there's nothing I wish more..just to keep counting blessings with you two.." he said into new kiss that gave you reassurance..<3

#gavigif #gavi #fc barça #fc barcelona #fc barca #pablo gavi x you #pablo gavi x y/n #pablo gavi x reader #pablo gavi icons #pablo gavi #gavi x reader #gavi x you #gavi x yn #gavi x vini #gaviral #pablo gavira #pablo martín páez gavira #gavira #pablogavixreadersmut #pablogavixreaderfluff

[thatfuckinjester]

gonna hurt myself with that one but i'm already crying so why noooot

yk how phantom doesn't get sent back to the pit in my one au? so what if he does.

no one was there when he was sent back, no one said goodbye, he was all alone.

no one even knew that he was gone, not until aether and omega came back and no one could even sense the energy of another quint in the ministry.

finding out that phantom has been sent back, it probably broke them.

aurora has locked phantom's room so no one will ever step inside, so maybe she can just pretend that he's still there, that she can still talk to him and he'll hear her. every night ends with her whispering "goodbye" to his door, because she never got to say that last goodbye.

rain hasn't left his room. grief can have that affect on you, or maybe not really grief because he never actually wanted to get to know phantom until it was too late to do it, and he knows he had let everyone down. he let phantom down, and it doesn't matter how many times he chokes out "i'm sorry" through sobs, he knows he can never make it up for him.

dew knows that feeling way too well, that feeling when you don't really appreciate someone until they're gone? it happened with everyone who ever were in his life, he should have known it would happen with phantom too, sometimes in the early mornings he's so sure that he can see phantom out there, next to a tree, his voice always gives up when he tries to csll out phantom's name and then he realize ot once again. phantom's gone.

swiss looks at the stars every night with sad face, he can see phantom's magick traveling between the stars and his heart ache. he did this, he caused this, and he used to be so happy when he talked about it before it was all real. he didn't feel like this for so long, not since he was a kit. and he keeps looking at the stars because you can take the stars out of the quint but not the quint out of the stars.

mountain can't. for the life of him he can't. so he stays in the greenhouse and loses it when he's alone, the flowers won't judge him for grieving someone he claimed to have hated. but when it's snowing outside and he can't go to the greenhouse? he looks at phantom's room door, looking at the empty plastic name plate that used to contain phantom's name. the next morning phantom's name was craved onto the locked door.

cirrus have sat down, back leaning on phantom's old, locked door, two cups of tea in her hands, one she sip from and one she left next to the door. she didn't talk, she never had the chance to actually talk to phantom, never wanted to beforehand, and now that she does want to it feels wrong, so she sits in silence, slowly sipping her tea, until it was all gone, leaving behind a cold cup of tea. when she looked at the sky, she saw how far away the moon actually was from the clouds.

cumulus keep leaving an empty plate on the table. phantom has been to two pack dinners, both times he sat between her to aurora, both times he always cleaned the table after himself unlike everyone else. she can never stop the silent tears when she clean away the unused plate.

maybe the quints were always meant for tragedies and not for greatness, maybe omega will always have to look at the stars with sore eyes, maybe aether will always have to see himself burning between the stars, but what's sure is that phantom will never get to watch the stars he loved so much, held dearly in his heart, ever again.

okay anyways goodnight i gotta be up in three hours

#jester rumbling #ghost #the band ghost #nameless ghouls #phantom ghoul #phantom ghost #aurora ghoulette #aurora ghost #rain ghoul #rain ghost #dewdrop ghoul #dewdrop ghost #swiss ghoul #swiss ghost #mountain ghoul #mountain ghost #cirrus ghoulette #cirrus ghost #cumulus ghoulette #cumulus ghost #omega ghoul #omega ghost #aether ghoul #aether ghost #phantom believing that he's being sent back to the pit

[historicity-was-already-taken]

I want to echo all the nice things people have said about your work, and add one more: I appreciate that your blog offers space to mourn the Holocaust. Not the Holocaust as a metaphor, not the Holocaust as a rhetorical invocation, but the Holocaust in and of itself. It provides a sobering kind of relief. When I was a kid learning about the Holocaust, my classes always showed me Life is Beautiful and The Boy in the Striped Pyjamas (UGH) and one teacher insisted that she wanted me to understand "how the Jews kicked Hitler's ass!" Which... no. On so many levels. So I admire how your work holds the dialectical truths of mass tragedy and brave resistance. Your scholarship matters, your mental health matters, and I can't wait to read your book next year!

This message is so lovely I was too verklempt to even answer it last night. Thank you, so much, for taking the time to write and send this.

And yes I totally get what you mean. It's not some, as you put it, rhetorical invocation populated by faceless martyrs, but the very real murders of millions of real, flawed, living, breathing humans. I think the rhetorical version, with its ideologies and hagiographies, is easier to swallow.

I hate most Holocaust movies. At least, American ones. They just want so badly for there to be a happy ending and...the Holocaust doesn't have one. [Unnamed legendary Jewish director] optioned the rights to [book similar in scope to mine which came out in the last 4 years] and I'm not even upset, because I don't enjoy that director's gentile-focused quasi-uplifting attempts to depict said events. Hitler said he was going to destroy the majority of European Jewry, and he did. In the space of 12 years he destroyed civilizations, cultures, and languages spanning 1000+ years; more, if you hold him responsible for the ethnic cleansing of MENA Jewish communities post-1948. Nothing uplifting there.

That's why I think I like weird, post-modern, magical realist approaches to Holocaust fiction [see: my boyfriend recently convinced me to watch Jojo Rabbit and Inglorious Basterds]. Telling any of these stories doesn't fit into Western narrative conventions. So make it weird; have the characters dance to David Bowie; make it a Western with subtitles; make the audience wonder if magic or just mundane in the specific context of the story. That's, imo, the only way to capture the sheer unreality of these very real events in fiction. I would LOVE a work of magical realist Holocaust fiction that involves the golem of Prague (if it exists omg tell me!) or something similar. Keeping in mind, of course, that I'm neither a film not a literary scholar. Just, as a historian who took one cultural criticism course in undergrad, those feels the most...right.

And oy your teacher. I feel for her; this is a difficult subject to teach. But...the Jews didn't kick Hitler's ass. That's the opposite of what happened. The Warsaw Ghetto Uprising is the most famous instance of organized Jewish resistance to the Holocaust, and those fighters only kicked ass until the Nazis (quickly) realized that they needed reinforcements and flamethrowers because oops these Jews came prepared. And even the fighters themselves knew that they weren't going to "win" anything. They were making a symbolic historical gesture/statement and fully expected to die. To the point that survivors almost uniformly express in their memoirs and testimonies that the ones who died fighting were the only real heroes and they rest of them are nbd, and this isn't something that should be talked about (which, is something that I'm trying to respect in my book! Like the fact that Zivia Lubetkin utterly rejected any attempt to describe her as a hero matters, even though that's how I personally view her).

Anyway I've rambled enough. Thank you again for the message!

[anxietywriter]

assorted prompts!

no particular theme, just a few ideas that i think are neat :3

a character that really likes journaling, and another character that accidentally happens upon it and reads a few lines

"You are so much more than what people say you are."

a character waiting for their flight in the airport. and the stranger that asks to sit by them because they're near a charging area.

addendum to the last one, finding out they're sitting next to each other for the whole flight.

the trope of a cafe being too busy and having to share a table with someone they don't know lives rent free in my head

alkf soulmate au soulmate au soulmate au, i personally like the matching marks one the most, but a lot of other popular ones i've seen are to do with eyes meeting and seeing color, touching and marks forming in the shape of that touch, being able to write on their skin for their soulmate to see, and shared dreams

maybe because i'm a sucker for angst but i'm also a big fan of soulmate au's in which one character's soulmark disappears or covered because of scars or a near death experience. not just because of the complications it creates for their fated to find them, but also the feeling of losing the one thing that connected them to their soulmate

painting/studio mates that are always working together. always in the studio together, working on projects late into the night. and it's this almost silent rivalry of who can make the most progress or who can stay in the studio the latest. how they always examine each other's painting and critique them in front of the whole class. at one point, they get to talking, reluctantly admitted to each other's skill. catch feelings. become each other's muse/inspiration. the works.

something about the tragedy of watching someone go to college in a major they hate. that they would be disowned if they chose their passion. how they were only happy in the one art class that their schedule allowed them to take. painting the walls with your name, if you can't remember this moment at least that room will. there was pain in the thought that they could've double majored. if only they knew about the possibility sooner.

like it's so tragic to me watching character be groomed as an heir to a big company or throne, when all they want is to know peace away from that world. they want the freedom to choose but can't for fear of losing everything they have. they will go through the motions if only to survive for the few moments of joy. but my favorite trope? when we see them find others that bring them the peace they crave. or y'know. when they leave their whole life behind, bright-eyed into the unknown.

i fucking love au's. i think i mentioned a pokemon au before but like aughhh love them. idk i just like thinking about what pokemon a character would use and what their ace would be. ALSO if they would be the kind of person that wants to beat the gym masters, win pokemon beauty competitions, use them for help in their profession, or just like, as a little guy, just a pet, what an adorable friend.

#writing prompts #prompt list #story prompts #AHHHH reincarnated as a slime season three in APRIL? #please be real i would love to watch it over the summer #kind of unreal #it's almost summer again already a;dlkfal

[blackhakumen]

Mini Fanfic #1181: The Return of the Mishimas (SSBU X Tekken X Fire Emblem)

10:45 a.m. Smash Mansion's Outdoor Patio........

Owain: (Sitting on the Grass and Panting Along with his Cousin, Lucina).......FINALLY!......I've never been....more happy.....to reach Break Time.....in my whole....life......(Looks Up at the Sun While Letting Out a Relaxed Sigh Before Getting a Drink of Water From his Bottle)

Lucina: Tell me about it.....I.....almost....forgot how....huge....this town......truly is......(Forms a Small Smile) Still, I can't thank you enough for accompanying me on my workout routine, Owain.

Owain: (Chuckles Lightly) Think nothing of the sort! I'm always happy to spend my morning working up a sweat and muscle gains, with you, my dear cousin.

Lucina: Likewise. (Claps her Hands Before Getting Herself Back Up on her Feet) Okay! Break's over.

Owain: (Eyes Widened in Disbelief) Already? But we JUST sat down!

Lucina: (Starts Wiggling her Finger in a Lecturing Fashion) Now, Owain, can't let our Break-Time distract us from our training sessions too much, no matter how luxurious it truly is. (Takes Oit Something From her Workout Bag) Besides, now that we're out here, I figured it would be the perfect time to start our next portion of the routine. Catch! (Toss Owain his Sword)

Owain: (Let's Out a Gasp as Catches his Sword Successfully) We're having a sparring match?~

Lucina: Indeed we are. (Takes her Sword Out From Inside her Bag) It's been so long since we've clash our blades in any form of fashion, so I figured we make up for old times. (Forms a Bit of s Competitive Smirk on her Face) Though, I do hope your swordsmanship skills hasn't falter during your time at Nohr.

Owain: (Chuckles Some More) Oho come now, cousin. I may have developed into the Darkest of All Mages you see before you......(Whirls and Tosses his Sword Up into the Air For a Brief Second Before Perfectly Catching it by the Handle and Forms a Competitive Smirk and Battle Stance) But my experience with a blade hasn't rusted one bit.

Lucina: Hm. Nice catch. But let's see if you still have what it takes to keep up with me.

Owain: I believe that was my line you used there, cousin. But yes, let us commence on this fine bout! In 3.

Lucina: 2.

Owain: 1.

As they both scream out the word "GO!", the two cousins of Ylisse rushes towards one another with their blades in hand, dodging and clashing with every bit of attacks that comes their reach.

'Door Open'

Mewtwo: (Levitating Himself Out the Door While Talking to his Bestie, Zelda) I fail to see the appeal of this Romeo & Juliette type of stories you and everyone else here has been speaking so fondly of.

Zelda: (Smiles Brightly) Just give it a chance, Mewwy. Once you see and analyze how each scene plays out from start to finish, I'm sure you'll grow to appericate the romance, drama and tragedy it has to offer as much as I....do.......

Zelda suddnly stops walking and widens her eyes up and sparkle as she watches a sophisticated looking young man with short blonde hair, sparring against Lucina, in slower motion.

Zelda: (Suddenlyyyyy!~ Life has a new meaning!~ To meeeeee!~ There's beauty up aboveee~ And things we never take notice of~ You wake up....and suddenly.....You're in Lo-)

Mewtwo: Zelda.

Zelda: (Immediately Gets Startled amd Coming Back to Reality) I WASN'T STARING AND DAYDREAMING AT HIM, I SWEAR!!

Mewtwo: .....I was going to ask you what version of Romeo and Juliette you recommend me to watch first. But I can see that your priorities is elsewhere now.

Zelda: ('Sigh') I'm sorry, Mewwy. My mind went completely sidetracked for a second. (Eyes Starts Sparkling at the Blonde Hair Boy Again) And it's all because of him~ Who is he?

Mewtwo: (Turns his Attention to the Boy in Question) Hm. It seems that's the new Dark Mage Hades mentioned. Odin, I believe is his name.....(Grabs his Chin While Thinking) Or was it Owain?

Zelda: They both sound like lovely names~

Mewtwo: You're crushing on him, aren't you?

Zelda: (Comes Back to Reality Once Again) What!? N-No! Of course not! (Chuckles Very Awkwardly) I-I mean, that would be silly of me! I would never- (Slouches her Upper Down Slightly While Sighing in Defeat) I am not doing a really good job in convincing you otherwise, am I?

Mewtwo: Your attempts were sloppy at best and predictable at worst.

Zelda: (Starts Whining) Mewyyy!~ This is the first time since forever that I'm developing a crush on someone and I'm already lost on what to do! You gotta help me!~

Mewtwo: Calm yourself. I'm sure you'll have a better chance of forming a potential relationship going forward with him if you just talk to him first-

Zelda: ODIN! OWAIN!!!

Owain: Hm? (Stops Sparring for a Secind as He Turns to See a Girl in Pink Happily Waving at him in the Distance)

Zelda: PARDON THE INTRUSION, BUT MY NAME IS PRINCESS ZELDA FRO. HYRULE! I HOPE WE CAN BE FRIENDS GOING FORWARD!!~

Owain: (Stares at Zelda For a Brief Second Before Happily Waving Back at Her) Ah, ahoy there, my fair maiden-(Suddenly and Quickly Dodges Himself Away From his Opponent's Blade While Letting a Terrified (And Somewhat Girlish) Scream)

Lucina: Stay focus, Owain!

Owain: Y-Yes ma'am! Will do, ma'am! (Continues Sparring with his (Slightly) Older Cousin)

Zelda: (Let's Out a Gasp Before Turning Back to Mewtwo) Mewwy, did you hear that?~ (Place her Hands onto her Chest While Putting on a Love Struck Smile on her Face) He called me his FaIr Maiden~

Mewtwo: (Already Has a Deadpinned Look on his Face) Pretty sure that was his way to be proper and polite. You are a princess after all.

Zelda: ('Sigh') True......(Smiles Softly While Blushing) It's still sweet though~ (Let's Out a Cute Giggles)

?????: Aww~ The princess' falling in love already?~ Don't blame you though. He I'd quite the looker and prince charming type~

Zelda: (Turns Around and Gasps at the Sight of....) Reina!~ (Happily Hugs the Short Hared Girl) It's you!~ Happy New Years!~

Reina: (Giggles Softly) Likewise, Zelda-san~ Really great to see you again. (Turns to Mewtwo) Same with you too, Mewwy. (Smiles Sheepishly) You don't....mind me calling you that, do you?

Mewtwo: Zelda's usually the only one allowed to call me that. (Rolls his Eyes a Bit) But I suppose it wouldn't hurt to let you do so as well, so long as you don't push it.

Reina: (Happily Hugs Mewtwo) Arigatō, Mewwy-Senpai!~

Mewtwo starts blushing in silence.

Zelda: It's been so long since we've last seen you. And Kazuya too now that I think about it.

Reina: (Starts Rubbing The Back of her Head Back and Forth) Yeah, sorry about that. I've been pretty busy for the last three months. Participating in the 8th Tekken Tournament, take part of a world global war against onii-san and the Zaibastu back in our universe......

Mewtwo: (Has his Deadpinned Look on his Face Again) That's explains it.

Reina: Oh! And while that was going on, I took a full powered Devil Gene to the entire body!

Zelda: (Eyes Widened in Complete Shock Along with Mewtwo) You did what!?

Mewtwo: That....Couldn't be pleasant.

Reina: Oh no, it wasn't. It was incredibly painful. But luckily, I was still able to survived all of that in the end. (Forms a Bit of a Devious Smirk) As well as making a few VERY interesting discoveries along the way.....(Went Back to Smiling Brightly) Buuuut now that you mentioned onii-chan......

Meanwhile at the Dining Room Hall........

Bowser: You lost ALL of your Devil Gene powers?

Ridley: While you were fighting your own son on a meteorite falling down from space?

Kazuya: To the ends of the Earth, yes. Even with those turns of events combined, they're STILL weren't enough to stop me from fighting-

Ganondorf: You still lost, didn't you?

Kazuya: ('Sighs in Defeat') Yeah, the mistake actually got the better of me in the end. You know, this new feeling I been having as of late. (Looks Down on the Palm of his Hand) Having pride in someone else.....Not entirely the most bothersome feeling our of the bunch.....(Balling his Fist Up in Anger) Too bad it's going be quickly overshadowed by my UNYIELDING RAGE!!!!

Kazuya angrily bolts himself up from his seat, creating a short shockwave strong enough to push it away and create a small crater on the floor he is now standing on.

Kazuya: (Starts Panting a Bit Before Calming Himself Down Shortly After) ..........Are you guys seeing any horns or wings on me right now?

Everyone at the Table: Nuh-uh/I don't see anything/Nope.

Kazuya: Damnit.

???: Kazuya!

The League of Evil Villains members turn themselves around to see a woman with long, beautiful black hair and a black and white attire, making her way to their table

???: Are you in here, my darling?

Kazuya: (Sighs While Pinching the Bridge of his Nose) Speaking of bothersome.......How goes the tour of the mansion, dear?

Ganondorf/Sephiroth/Pichu: Darling?/Pichu?

Bowser/Ridley: Dear!?

Dark Smaus: ('Gasps')

Hades: (Starts Forming a Long, Diabolical Grin on his Face) Well, I'll be bloody damned! Are we about to witness another bombshell in here today, on this fine morning?~

Sephiroth: (Turns to Kazuya) Mine telling us who this woman is, Kazuya?

Kazuya: ('Sighs in Defeat') This woman is-

???: (Smiles Softly at Former Devilman) It's okay, Kazuya. I got this. (Turns her Attention to the Rest of the Villains Before Bowing Politely to Them) Please excuse my intrusion this morning. My name is Jun Kazama of the Kazama clan. And I....just so happen to be Kazuya's one and only wife.

Everyone: WIFE!!!? (IMMEDIATELY Turns Their Heads Back to Kazuya)

Kazuya: ...............('Clicks Teeth') So! About my fight in space-

Hades: (Let's Out a Very Evil Laugh) OHOHOHOHO NO!~ Don't even think about changing the subject here, lover boy!

Ridley: How the hell someone like you got yourself a wife?

Kazuya: (Snarls at Ridley) ('Hmph') Unlike you, I wasn't an hopeless incel of a punching bag.

Ridley: (Glares at Kazuya) Hey, at least I finally got me a girlfriend after all this time! (Turns to Dark Samus, Smiling and Holding her Hand) And she's very lovely by the way~

Dark Samus' heart begins to melt in genuine happiness as she place her other hand onto her chest.

Kazuya: (Rolls his Eyes) And you're standards must be as low as your intelligence if you consider that THING an actual lady.

Jun: (Glares at her Husband) Kazuya!

Ridley: (Angrily Slams his Hands on the Table While Getting Up From his Seat Along with Dark Samus) YOU TAKE THAT BACK RIGHT NOW, ASSHOLE!

Dark Samus growls at Kazuya as she's about to summon her arm cannon.

Bowser: (Burst Out Laughing) Ahaha man! He got you guys good, not gonna lie!

Kazuya: (Turns to Bowser) I dunno why you're laughing. There's not a day that goes by where you haven't gotten rejected or bitch slapped by the very same princess you tried to kidnap, on a daily basis

Bowser: (Immediately Cease his Laughing and Frowns) W-Why you gotta do me like that, man? I was just laughing.

Ganondorf: ('Sigh') Everyone, please! We are clearly getting off topic here. (Turns to Jun) Now tell us, Jun, how is a sweet and polite woman such as yourself, managed to fall for someone as repulsive as him? (Points Jun to Kazuys, Who is Now Flipping him Off)

Jun: (Giggles Softly) You know, i always ask myself that exact question, even more so now that I've come out hiding. (Smiles Fondly) But then I started to think back about all the moments we shared together, despite how little it was, and how much of a sweetheart he truly was, even if he doesn't show it off at times~

Kazuya: (Notices Everyone in the Table Went Back to Stare at Him) Will you quit staring at me already!? I know how much of a mess I am!!

Jun: (Place her Hands onto Kazuya's Shoulders, Calming Him Down) Calm yourself, my dear. It's true that you're a mess of person, but that cold, rough body of yours hides a lost, scared soul yearning for the chance to grow into becoming something new and better. I know you have what it takes to improve yourself Kazuya, my love, and I will do whatever I can to help and support you every step of the way, as ypur loving wife. (Kisses Kazuya on the Forehead) And I believe a good starting point is for you forming an proper apology to everyone you've wronged and hurt I the past, the first being Jin.

Kazuya: (Scowls and Groans in Annoyance) Are you seriously?

Jun: (Forms a Motherly Glare at Kazuya) Yes, I am. He's our son, Kazuya.

Kazuya: He's a purest definition of a mista-

Kazuya immediately shuts himself up once he sees Jun's glare is now piercing through his inner soul.

Kazuya: I-I mean....('Clears Throat') Yes. He's......our..... son alright. But have you forgotten that HE was the one who started a global war in our world in the first place?

Jun: ('Sigh') I haven't, and I will most certainly have a long talk with him the next time we see each other. But let's not sit here and forget that you and your organization caused just as much, if not, even more damage to our world even before the war even started. And what us this I hear about you celebrating in front of your father's grave?

Kazuya: The man threw off a cliff when I was six and tried to kill me ever since, I'm pretty sure I have every right to celebrate his rightful demise. Besides, didn't you sent Jin away to training with him throughout his teenage years, knowing full well how evil and twisted he is?

Jun: He was the only available family member I could contact at the time! ('Sighs in Defeat') But I realized that it wasn't the best choices I made the over the years........

Kazuya: (Simply Nodded) ('Hmph') As you should be.

Jun: (Starts Pouting at her Husband) Don't give me that! You still have a lot apologizing to do, you know?

Kazuya: (Sighs While Rolling his Eyes) I know, I know, I'll get around to working on that. (Gets Himself Up From his Seat) But can I at least get some fresh air first? (Notices Everyone in the Table Smirking at Him) Away from these aggravating idiots?

Jun: (Giggles a Bit) Of course. Take your time.

Kazuya: ('Sighs in Relief') Thank you! (Starts Walking Away Before Stopping For a Second Without Turning Back Around) Oh and....Jun?

Jun: Yes?

Kazuya: Thanks.....for believing in me and junk. And...... (Takes a Deep Breath Before Speaking)......I love you. (Finally Continues his Walk)

Jun: (Heart Begins to Melt in Genuine Happiness) I love you too, dear.

Hades: (Smiles Brightly) Love ya too, Kazie!~

Kazuya: (Flips Him abd Everyone Else Without Turning Back) Eat a dick!

Hades: I'll pass, thanks. (Chuckles Evilly) He's way too easy to piss off.

Pichu: (Smiles Brightly) Pi-chu!~

Sephiroth: (Chuckles Lightly) That's right, son. He is purest definition of a "Whipped Man"

Bowser: (Scoffs While Rolling his Eyes) More like punk man if you ask me. Who do he think he is dissing me like that?

Ridley: I mean, he's not wrong. You gotta move on from Peach sooner or later man.

Bowser: NEVER!

Jun: (Politely Bows at League of Villains) I cannot thank you all enough for being friends with my husband after a this time. Or....rather, tolerate his presence for this long. I can tell he caused you trouble along the way.

Ganondorf: ('Sigh') You're not wrong in that assumption, I know. (Smiles a Bit) But I'm glad we got to finally meet you in person.

Ridley: (Smiles Brightly) Same here! Really don't get why you married Kazuya of all people, but i still think you're pretty nice lady all things considered.

Hades: You know.......If you want, you're more than welcome to join our club. The more, the merrier.

Sephiroth: (Nodded in Agree) I agree to this. It could give you more opportunity to watch over him, make sure he doesn't cause too much trouble.

Ganondorf: (Forms an Evil Smirk on his Face) Not like he's gonna do much of anything considering he's now an ordinary man. What do you say, ma'am?

Jun: (Smiles Brightly) I'd be honored to join you all. Thank you so much.

Bonus

Outside of the Mansion.....

Kazuya: (Sitting on the Front Steps While Grumbling to Him) I despise this new year so far.....My Devil Gene powers are gone, I got humbled by my mistake of a son, and my credibility as a villain is decreasing as we speak. ('Sigh') But at least I'm reunited with Jun again. So there's that at least

?????: Onii-Chan!~

Kazuya: ('Groans') What do you......

Kazuya's eyes slowly starts to widened up as he suddenly see Reina in the sky along with a Levitating Mewtwo, carrying cheery Zelda in arms.....While she is in her devil form.

Reina: Fancy seeing you on this fine morning!~ I would love to come down and chat, but I have a princess fly around at the moment.

Zelda: (Happily Waves at Kazuya) See you in a bit, Kazuyaaaaa!!~

As the trio flies off, one of Kazuya's eyes starts to twitch rapidly before screaming out........

Kazuya: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

@zionjedi8

@ma-lemons

@theweebmaster31

@caleb13frede

@albion-93

@bestpony666

@cyber-wildcat

#super smash ultimate #tekken #fire emblem #kazuya mishima #owain #lucina #mewtwo #zelda (ultimate) #reina mishima #hades #ganondorf #sephiroth #bowser #ridley #pichu #dark samus #jun kazama #takes place a month or two after the events of tekken 8 #humor #cute romance #fluff #kazuya x jun #valentine's month #edited #league of villains

[stargazer-sims]

Making breakfast and bring it to your bed - for Victor and Yuri thanks

Thanks @dandylion240 ! All of these prompts are so cute. I'm glad you asked me one, because I couldn't decide which one(s) I wanted to do first. I really enjoyed doing this one, and I think I'll try to choose a few more to do, and set them in the same general time period.

Anyway, I'm putting this one under a cut because it's long. Enjoy!

__________

Yuri cracks an egg and watches with a strange kind of fascination as its contents plop into the clear glass bowl on the counter in front of him. He can't help marvelling at himself, at all the ways in which he's changed. There was a time when he wouldn't have touched an egg, let alone broken one open. The mere thought of the slimy egg white and squishy yolk would've sent him running for the nearest restroom with his stomach trying to turn itself inside out.

Amused at the memory of his squeamish former self, he wipes a bit of egg off his fingers with a paper towel and then drops both it and the eggshell into the trash bin. Careful not to get any on himself this time, he cracks two more eggs into the bowl and begins to whisk them. When he's satisfied that the yolks and whites are well blended, he adds some milk. A splash of vanilla extract goes in next, followed by a dash of nutmeg and a generous pinch of cinnamon.

Yuri knows this recipe by heart now. French toast is on Victor's list of favourite things to have for breakfast, and although Yuri himself isn't a fan, he's learned to make it because it's one of the simple pleasures in Victor's life. When they first met fifteen years ago, Yuri recognized almost straight away that Victor was the sort of person who knew how to take joy where he found it, even in the smallest of occurrences. He's still like that, always ready to appreciate the little things and to find reasons to be happy and grateful.

Yuri likes doing things to make his husband smile. Breakfast in bed should be a nice surprise for him this morning, especially after returning home from what Yuri can only infer was a particularly difficult overnight shift.

Victor got back from his shift at the hospital less than an hour ago. After giving Yuri a perfunctory kiss on the cheek, he'd gone straight upstairs to shower and sleep. On most mornings after a night shift, he doesn’t go to bed immediately. After showering, he normally makes his way back downstairs to share breakfast with Yuri and chat about their respective evenings. He does most of the talking. Yuri typically doesn't have much to say since he's often in bed by the time Victor leaves, but he's content to listen to Victor's anecdotes about cute or funny patients and his recounting of the daily drama of the paediatric unit's staff.

When Victor doesn't want to talk about his night, Yuri knows it must've been a rough one. Victor copes with the stress of caring for sick and injured children fairly well, and Yuri thinks he's figured out how not to become too emotionally invested in his patients, but Victor is a loving and sensitive person and besides, no one is completely immune to the psychological effects of trauma and tragedy.

Only a week ago, he'd come home crying because one of his new patients that day was a six year old girl who'd lost her father in a car crash involving a drunk driver. He'd barely been able to get that much information out before he was full-on sobbing in Yuri's arms. The only other coherent phrase Yuri had caught was, "She's called Caroline."

Victor's younger sister's name was Caroline. Thirty years ago, when he was just six years old, he'd lost her and their father in a collision with an impaired driver. His patient's circumstances had obviously overwhelmed him, and if he wasn't ready to talk, Yuri understood why.

The best thing to do, Yuri knows, is to let Victor come to him when he feels comfortable. Often, they'll be curled up in bed together and Victor will tell him in subdued tones about the death of a patient, the raw anger, fear or grief of a parent, or the crushing cosmic injustice of a child suffering with an incurable disease.

Yuri doesn't say anything, because Victor doesn't want sympathy or advice. All he wants is for someone to hear him and comfort him, to help him let the bad thoughts go. Yuri is more than willing to do that. He just holds him and tells him he's brave and says how proud he is of him.

With the egg mixture ready, Yuri turns his attention to cutting up some fruit. He wants everything else to be prepared before he cooks the French toast, so he can plate it and take it upstairs while it's still hot. The eggs probably have enough protein, so he doesn't bother with any side meat, but he does cut some cubes of cheese and arranges them alongside the slices of orange and quartered strawberries.

Soon, the kitchen is filled with the scent of the sizzling French toast. It smells heavenly, and he wishes fleetingly that he could appreciate the flavour as much as he appreciates the aroma.

Three golden slices of French toast and a tall glass of cold milk later, the preparations are complete. Almost.

Struck by sudden inspiration, Yuri hurries out the back door and into the yard. In late May, his garden is already in bloom and it’ll only grow more vibrant and beautiful as spring brightens into summer.

He studies the flowers for a few seconds. The tulips are blossoming in abundance. He carefully picks a red one — Victor’s favourite colour — and brings it back to the house.

Laying the red tulip on the breakfast tray next to the utensils rolled in a white cloth napkin, Yuri decides the meal looks perfect. He carries the entire thing upstairs.

The door of Victor's room is partially open, as if he were anticipating Yuri joining him. When Yuri steps across the threshold, he notices that Victor is in bed, but he's certain he isn't sleeping. The blankets are pulled up to his neck and he's curled on his side, facing away from the door. Victor doesn't like to sleep curled up like that. He has a tendency to sprawl, and he doesn't like to have his arms under the blankets for whatever reason.

The chunky bedside table is just large enough to accommodate the breakfast tray, and Yuri sets it down.

"Victor?" He says his husband's name quietly, so as not to startle him.

Victor rolls onto his back. He opens his eyes, and upon seeing Yuri, he offers a tiny smile. "Hello again."

"Are you okay?" Yuri asks him.

"I'm okay. Just tired."

"I made breakfast for you."

Victor angles his gaze toward the bedside table, and his reaction at seeing the tray of food is absolutely not what Yuri expects. In the space of a heartbeat, his eyes fill with tears. Victor has always cried easily, but this is unusual and alarming.

"Victor, what's wrong?" Yuri asks, anxious as to what it could be.

"Nothing," Victor replies. He sniffles. "Nothing's wrong. It's just... I really love you. I love that you thought of bringing me breakfast in bed."

Yuri climbs onto the bed and slips under the covers with him. It's immediately obvious that Victor wants to be cuddled more than he wants food, and Yuri doesn't hesitate to oblige. Victor rests his head on Yuri's chest, and Yuri combs his fingers through his soulmate's beautiful silver hair. Victor cries softly for a few minutes, but eventually he settles beneath Yuri's gentle touch.

"Okay?" Yuri asks, once he realizes Victor's tears have subsided.

"Yeah," Victor says.

"I love you."

"I know. Even if you never said the words, I'd know. It's what keeps me going, having you to come home to. Like, when the whole world feels as if it's spinning out of control, as long as I've got you, I always know there's a safe place for me."

"Was it bad last night?"

Victor nods. "Yeah, it was. We lost a patient. A little boy. Nine years old."

"I'm sorry," Yuri says.

"And then there's Caroline," Victor continues. "The little blind girl who got admitted last week. You know, the one from the car crash? Dr. Reid-Mayfield told me they're going to have to discharge her into foster care. I mean, I know that's how it goes, but like... she doesn't speak English, and she's just been through all this horrible stuff, and..." He trails off, as if he's suddenly run out of words. "Sorry."

"It's okay," Yuri reassures him. "She's gotten into your head, hasn't she?"

"Maybe into my heart would be more accurate," Victor says. "That's not supposed to happen, but I guess I let my guard down."

"Perhaps it happened for a reason."

"I don't know," Victor says, and Yuri thinks his tone sounds more pensive than doubtful.

They're quiet for several minutes after that, until the silence is broken by Victor's stomach growling audibly. Yuri has to stifle a laugh as Victor murmurs, "Shh..." as if his body might actually respond.

"Let me guess," Yuri says. "You're too comfortable now to sit up and eat?"

"No, I'm definitely ready to eat. I just wish I could be comfortable and full at the same time."

Yuri finally lets his laughter out. "I'll tell you what. Why don't you have your breakfast before it gets too cold? I'll stay in here with you, and then afterwards we can cuddle as long as you like. Then you can be comfortable and full at the same time."

"Don't you have to go to work?" Victor inquires.

"It's Saturday, love," Yuri reminds him.

"Oh. Right. Night shift rotations totally mess with my sense of time."

"Fortunately for you, you're on early shift for the next two rotations."

"Yeah," Victor confirms. "And I've got three days off now, so my brain can recover before I have to go back." He rolls away from Yuri and sits up. Then, he reaches for the breakfast tray and positions it on his lap. "This looks amazing, by the way."

"Thank you," Yuri says. "Here's hoping it tastes as good as it looks."

"What are you talking about? French toast is your specialty."

Judging by the way he devours it, Victor's initial assessment of the French toast must be correct. He shares the fruit with Yuri, feeding him pieces of strawberry with his chopsticks.

Yuri recalls a time in the past when his doctor had put a strict ban on Victor feeding him anything. He's never had the best relationship with food and eating, and when he refused to eat on his own back then, Victor had fed him. It'd grown into a dangerous habit that they'd been forced to break in the cause of literally saving Yuri's life.

They still stick to the rules for the most part, but these days they're both confident enough not to be concerned about a small indulgence here and there. Yuri likes the attention, and although Victor probably wouldn't admit it, Yuri is convinced he likes to baby him sometimes. In any case, Yuri isn't about to complain.

Victor places the tray on the floor beside the bed once he's done eating, and then he and Yuri snuggle under the blankets again. When Victor kisses him, Yuri tastes maple syrup. He smiles against Victor's mouth and whispers, "You taste wonderful."

"Like dessert?" Victor says.

"Mmm..."

"So, what you're really saying is that breakfast in bed isn't over yet? You brought me more than French toast?"

Yuri isn't so lacking in awareness as to believe Victor has forgotten everything he carried home from the hospital in his mind, nor that he's forgotten their earlier conversation. They may revisit it again later, but Victor has the enviable ability to live in the moment and right now he clearly isn't dwelling on his worries and fears.

Breakfast in bed, it seems, is indeed not over yet.

#sapphire answers #writing #writing prompt #oc asks #yuri okamoto #victor nelson #stargazersims

[dxckgrxsonx]

Okay okay more exbf thots and forgive me if this has already been said but

It's the "I'd be lying if I said I didn't want you to be the one"

And the "I want you to be happy with me"

And the unfollowing and refollowing their social media because you don't want to see them be happy but you do, oh god you do.

And it's a tragedy you can't look away from knowing that you'll never have better but you can't stay or it'll ruin the both of you but what sweeter ruin is there than loving and being loved in return?

Stop it you're killing me. i'm dying. how can you do this to me??

just not being able to say it. thinking it over and over again. thoughts horribly twisted, painful. your own hands wrapped around your throat to stop it coming out. words stuck endlessly in your head because would it change anything if they knew? would it make a difference. "i thought you were the one." "i swear to god you were it for me; there won't ever be anyone else."

my whole life was centred around you, revolved around you, lived and breathed and spun on the axis of you and now you're gone. nothing left but empty space. "you're gone and i'm alone and i think you took my heart with you when you left." "i don't know if i ever want it back." "i don't know if i can have it back."

our lives were tangled together. holding hands. convinced that what we had was for forever, that it was eternal. that we would take on the whole world back to back. there is a hole inside me. gaping and empty and shaped like you. "i have to learn to live without you." you orbit something for so long you become accustomed to it. its as natural as gravity. and then its gone and you're circling nothing at all. barren desolate space. "i don't know if i can ever live another day in my life without you next to me."

shaking hands. an awful pull in your chest when you see them. its nothing but a photo and you're not in it but there they are. there they are. reach out with your fingers and touch nothing but a screen. unfollow. it hurts too much. you're fine. you're fine. you're fine. endless, repetitive. its just a photo. but you're not in it. they've taken down everything with you in it. you're crying on the bathroom floor. refollow. they're happy. its bittersweet. you want them to be happy. you want them to live their life. you want to throw your phone at the wall. someone's turning a knife in your chest. "how can something hurt this bad and not kill you?" "I want you to be happy but good fucking god i wanted you to be happy with me." "why aren't you happy with me?" "why don't you want me?"

tragedy in heartbreak. tragedy written all over your face. tragedy in the empty side of the bed where you used to sleep. tragedy in the bathroom where your shampoo bottle still sits in the shower. tragedy in knowing you have to let go. "these tragedies are all i have left of you. i don't know if i can let them go. let you go. i'll have nothing left."

i'm watching us ruin our lives. i can't stand it. our very lives are on a collision course but its not a good thing anymore. we'll destroy each other if we don't walk away. "would you turn around? would you look back?"

"i'd watch my whole world burn if i could love you one last time." "I'd burn it to the ground myself if you asked me to." "what sweeter ruin is there than loving and being loved in return."

#im experiencing feelings #this has fucked me up #you've fucked me up #how can i be normal after this #the unfollowing and refollowing their social media :( #that made me so sad #just having this little window into their lives #but not being able to touch it like you used to #knfjknajkfkek #asks #answered #anonymous #exbf!dick grayson #writing inspo

[slightlytoastedbagel]

For the ask game, what’s a pairing you love and/or despise? I’m interested to know :)

also, choose any fandom you’d like <3

Hmmm. I've already done this with sekai... Fuck It I'm doing Twitch Plays Pokemon. (Nothing for despise because there isn't really much stuff pairing related for this and I just can't think of anything).

To me it's not even necessarily in the romantic sense, but Rattodile is the closest thing to "canon" anything can be when the entire story and characters are made through interpretation by the people watching and playing on a twitch stream. I just think they're neat. One of the first subplot's was about the kid who has gone from "mama's boy who doesn't really like anyone else" to "the face of a war against God" within 14 days having a form of support that, despite not knowing what was going on, was able to give him a break. The support coming from another kid who desperately wanted someone to listen to him and take him seriously. They are best friends they probably realise 7 years later they're in love I want to cry.

I also think Camila/Alice is cool. "Hey. Your dad reset the entire world to bring you back to life. I tried to stop him but I reached the Champion too late. You learnt about it when you went on your pokemon journey and dedicated the next 3 years of your life to bringing the old world back because this new 'wonderland' as he called it is actually really unstable and the world will end soon if you don't. I was in the void with the guy from the first run because when the world reset it resulted in a timeline where I was never born and he sort of just... never existed? No clue why that Godslayer kid got to stay in Johto but good for him I guess. We were sort of just watching you the whole time. I know you had to try and figure out a way to save yourself as well because you are still a teenager at the end of the day. We're all kids. We shouldn't have to be putting up with all of this. At least we're all alive now I suppose. Hey do you like girls?"

Evan/Azure as well. The tragedy of it all. You thought your childhood best friend died when the boat you were both on got hijacked and crashed but it turns out you were the one that died and she lived and became champion and defeated the people that led to the boat crashing but when she sees you again you've been taken over by an eldritch God and your happy to see her but she knows the you in front of her isn't her version of you.

#twitch plays pokemon #AHHHH #first post in the tag (hi) #don't expect much from me #bagel answers #someone: *unknowingly gives me opportunity to talk about anything* #me: twitch stream about fossil pokemon being gods go brrrr #i'm sorry for this but also i'm really not #thank you for bringing out my special interest i've been meaning to do that

[sword-dad-fukuzawa]

🌿🤲🕯🍉

ooh thanks for sending this in! had to dig deep for some of these, hehe.

Fic Writer Asks

🌿how does creating make you feel?

Like flying, on good days. Like I'm the livewire between some great sea made up of A Story and my computer. Sometimes it's like I'm a subtitler/transcript writer for the characters talking inside my skull. I'm never an active participant and when the writer juice is juicin', it's easy to listen and watch and put everything down on paper. It's one of the few activities where I'm totally focused (rock climbing and martial arts are the other ones, LOL.)

On bad days, it's like pulling teeth. Like the characters are having conversations but the fuckin door is closed and lined in poor soundproofing material, so I can tell they're doing stuff in there, and catch snatches of interactions, but nothing I can turn into a narrative.

🤲what do YOU get out of writing?

THE DAMN PROPHESIES AND VISIONS OUT OF MY SKULL!!

In all seriousness though, I get a lot out of writing. It's relaxing, it lets my scattered brain fixate on One Thing for a bit, and it makes me feel productive and satisfied in a way that few other things can manage. It makes me happy :)

Also hearing that my fics can make other people feel things is. Huge to me. It's tangible proof I can connect with other people on an emotional level, that something I made meant something. I can't go into full on Atsushi mode and say that tells me It Is Okay to Be Alive but it does soothe the "nothing you do matters" nihilistic urges.

🕯️was there a fic that was really hard on you to write, or took you to a place you didn't think it would take you?

Mmmm. This one. Writing it was like pulling the ugliest parts of myself out into daylight and turning it into a fictional argument. This dovetails real nice into the next question too.

🍉in what ways has writing helped you process trauma and/or navigate through your own life?

I write a lot when I'm depressed. The stuff that comes out of me in periods like that isn't necessarily my best works, because it's all...raw. There's a long process that my experiences have to go through before they're distant enough from Me, Quinn, the Writer, that I can put them into a fic without feeling strange about it; this gets expedited when I'm in a bad place. I'm already fairly prolific normally but the sheer amount of writing I do when I'm sad is unhinged.

What We Left in the Ashes (from which a chapter is linked above) is 98k written in a period of about two months. They were a bad two months considering I was in a crumbling relationship and in denial about it, plus knee deep in a toxic ass fandom on top of struggling mentally. I didn't realize that I had projected all my conflicted feelings about my relationship into Prayers to Imminent Tragedy until much later, but it just goes to show that writing is a way for me to express feelings that I don't want to examine closely in the moment. For that, it's a goddamn invaluable tool.

It should also be noted that I write a lot when I'm happy, too. The fics are usually a lot better quality, and come out slower :)

#narky!! #fic writer asks #ahhh this got a lil heavy and personal sorry T-T

[akshayaasblog]

Bloodletting on 5th Avenue

My father asked me once why I never wrote happy endings. It was because I never knew of one, and I could only write of what I knew. But I couldn’t tell him that- the truth of how things were. Not my mother, no, I could never tell her. I never told her anything anyway. I hadn’t spoken to her in years, not really. My sister- in her own trenches of despair, could take on no more. Besides, we never really did see eye-to-eye. And I’d already had no friends anymore. Not a soul knew. 

They wouldn't understand anyway.

How it had all chipped away at me, until all I had was just the barest parts of me left. And eventually, I had nothing, nothing at all left of me- a purged skeleton, a hollow shell, a weightless husk. It wasn’t just one thing, no, it was everything else too- one thing after the other. A cluster of instances, a sequence of tragedies, each discrete trauma piling onto the next- augmenting, compounding, overbearing. And how it had ripped but all out of me, first as abrasions on my skin, then lacerations, and then contusions, concussions, fractures, and then all the hemorrhaging on the bathroom floor that saw too many tears. An evisceration. I'm so hollow now.

And then I came to a strange place, I wished to explore, but was too dead inside to do so. 

I was dead inside. Do you hear me?

I felt nothing. There was concrete and there was steel, but I saw no colour. The greatest city in the world, the birthplace of culture, the pearl of the oyster- holographic, and I saw no colour.  The skyline beamed crassly with the jagged monotony of recursive rectangular blocks. Headlights loomed over tar roads where sirens howled against revolving lights that answer to calls of distress. There was so much distress. The giant billboards of Times Square- nothing but a giant corporate charade. What a farce. It all sucked the life out of me. All of this information- every cathode light, steel beam and concrete column. Every shuffle of a footstep, scuff on the traffic sign, every scratch on every brick of a brownstone wall. I see it all. Every step, every beat, every scribble- It's all too much. So much redundancy- futile as good advice to a lost soul. It’s always there, always so much, and yet I feel nothing at all. Nothing but a gnaw that grows and grows. It grew to a whisper, a voice, and then a battering ram against my temples.

I was dead inside and nobody heard me. The world was a cold and dark place, bleak and hostile, lonely and sad. Nobody else saw it either, they couldn't...oh, how could they? That was part of the tragedy, wasn't it? That they couldn’t see..what a cruel, cruel world we live in. And the disdain grew, grew to a mountain, a world, an entire universe upon me...a universe of disdain, of pain, of darkness, of suffering. I bore a universe of suffering upon me. Do you hear me?

...

What had I done? What had happened to me?

I haven’t moved in ages. There’s thornbush growing between my toes. They’ve taken root in the soil underneath my nails. They’re digging into my skin that crumbles like pumice stone. I’m so barren.  Nothing brought me joy anymore. Nothing made me happy. Every motion- an insurmountable task. Every thought- an unbearable burden. My mind had been taken from me, and in its place, a thousand mountains. Everything but my sense of self- taken from me. It’s always noisy. There’s no music anymore- watch me grieve. You are so far gone. No...no, that’s not true. Nothing’s changed. This is who I always was, don’t you remember?  Ever since you started becoming your own person, trying to find your place in this world, getting to know the world outside. You were always strange, lost, ugly, dirty, broken and in pain, never fit in, unfit, improper, insufficient, insignificant, unworthy, fractured. You ugly, broken thing. You are nothing. You are nobody. You had no right to be here, how dare you? You can't even get yourself out of bed, how pathetic. You sorry, broken thing. Leave, LEAVE right now. This world doesn’t need you, it doesn't require you.

But then, You’re too good for this world anyway, aren't you? Fuck everybody. All the contortions from bending to their will, my limbs fractured, my stomach haemorrhaging, my blood and guts on the bathroom floor. Who are you? 

Do you know how I am? Who I could be? What I'm capable of? You'll see. Watch me.

And then the grandeur kicks in. Soaring intellect and pipe dreams, thoughts of progress and realized purpose. My final salvation. You’ll be somebody...someday. Someday you'll achieve, and then you'll show them, won't you? Watch me. All my naysayers, my detractors, all the haters. I’m in the greatest city in the world, don't you know? The pearl of the oyster.

How I need all your approval- the irony escapes me. 

You'll be great, you'll be fantastic, you'll be recognized for all your value. That was all the driving force I had left. Unable to die, I cling desperately to a remnant sense of worldly ambition that I remain here for.  It was all I was inside aside from the suffering- it was...What an amazing person I could be, the unsung hero that you are.  Someday. And then it'll ease the suffering, won't it? Or at least make me realize my purpose despite the suffering, keep it at bay, set it aside for a bit. I could be someone of value. I'll be fantastic, you'll see. You'll show them all, won't you? The worthless little worms who all chipped away at you.

But how worthless I am today,  for never doing any of it- unable to try, unable to reach, unable to do anything. You worthless little worm. Every breath you breathe you're sucking oxygen out of this world, oxygen better spent elsewhere, your expanse of space- a grand charity. You're a disgrace- unused inertia, a stain upon this world, the hollow behind a drywall.  You’re nobody now, why the fuck would you be somebody someday?You are so far gone. You shitstain, skidmark, pile of garbage in the back-alley of a third-rate motel. What a delusion. How self-absorbed. How arrogant. How conceited. You're the same as the lot of them- the bottom-feed, the dirt of society. You're the deceit of a casino pretending to play a chess-game. You sicken me. You can’t even get yourself out of bed. Who the hell are you to be someone, you nobody?

I can hear them whisper. They’re all thinking it- the wicked, vile little creatures.  You’re nobody.

Everyone is. And we all suffer. At some point, we do, because that is what we are when we are all that remains. This slow hell we call life, do you see them all crawling? Life is suffering, laughter is a distraction, joy- a passing mirage, a house of cards, tumbleweed in the desert, 

a silliness, a callow indulgence, a foolish lie. 

The only constant is suffering and meaninglessness.

..

The city breathes. She chokes like she has cherry-seed stuck in her throat. Like a whore who had no choice but to be born and to breathe- be choked.  We’re all crash test dummies, lacking the needed faculties to thrive. But somehow we survive. What a cruel joke. Subsisting. With lives swimming in saltwater- the more you drink, the more you thirst. All anything does is go from bad to worse,  Some fraudulent solace passes as a charitable in-between, and then right back again; so it goes.

The click-clacking of keyboards and phones ringing. How was your day? What did you do last weekend? The words strain at me like nails on a chalkboard, and it grows, it grows to a bullhorn, a siren, to a battering ram against my temples. Nothing. I did nothing. I did nothing today, yesterday, last weekend, all of last week and last month, I can't even remember most of last year. I can’t even remember my last meal. Liar. Liars- the lot of them. You don’t want to know that. Not really. Stop asking me. Stop talking to me. Don't even look me in the eye. Leave me alone here, in the middle of nowhere. Nobodies living in nowheres. Everywhere is the middle of nowhere. Meaning is a construct. Life is misery. We’re all so unseen. Never truly ourselves, never truly belonging, never truly connecting; in these bullshit masquerade balls we call life. All the dancing in empty rooms full of people, limbs bending to noise we call music, marionettes flopping side-to-side to static, with muscles like trembling leaves turning spastic. Too many, toppling, turning. Trying, trying. Always trying. It’s always never quite, just almost, just a little longer, just a little harder, just a little and you’re almost there, you'll make it in life, just a sliver, just a hair, and one day life will finally be fair.

Fair. What a farce.

Hope is an endless cycle. It’s a foolish lie. Indulging in these fraudulent illusions, these petty things we resort to to make us forget. Have breakfast, feed the kids, go to work, eat, sleep, a few drinks at the end of the day, a few more on the weekends- some libations to mollify. And then again. How they all suffer, the poor things. 

We’re all crash test dummies, walking around pretending to know what we’re doing. We DON'T and we’re all liars. Lying, lying, keep lying. People are thoughtless, vile little creatures. The inflections on all these faces that I now recognize, couldn’t help but notice- the cadence of their voices, the pause between their words,  the countenance of their faces, the manner and contortions of their bodies. Every choice, every instinct, every inflection, glaring at me- revealing sorrow, resentment, condescension, arrogance, conceitedness, pride, pretence, predation. MALICE.

Taking, taking, keep taking. All the bodies burning in this slow hell we call life. It’s a jungle out there. 

The clack-clack-clacking of keyboards and bleat-bleat-bleating of sheep, Their beady little eyes, watching, lurching, everywhere. Paper tigers, russian dolls, and the cowardice of prey, They run, run, run. There’s nowhere to go anyway, Apex predators, wafer-thin egos and noses up in the air, They ravage and consume all with none left to spare, Their scheming faces, conniving, sly, bleating mouths that speak and sigh, The hunt plays out, vicious and vile, Watch me grieve as my childhood dies.

Does your God ever feel remorse?  Maybe we all deserve to suffer.

An unbearable loathing for humanity takes over.  The veil has lifted away.  You see this? Do you see this hellfire? The world is burning, don’t you see? Of course you don’t. That’s part of the tragedy, isn’t it? Remember. Remember, just how dark, how hostile, how callously cruel, how unjust, how malicious. 

Cold. Frigid. Ruthless. Heavy.

You're heaving on my chest

You're heaving on my chest

YOU’RE HEAVING ON MY FUCKING CHEST.

I’m cutting diamonds with the back of my teeth, a finger in a dike, a swollen wound, a broken deluge, Till it all comes crashing down on me. Hold me back lest I’m unleashed.

The city eats me, she swallows me whole, I’m taken by the voracious greed of this hellhole. I swell to a brim, deep in the stomach-pit of New York City.

I pass a giant chainsaw through the middle of the street, it flies by like a skyscraper on wheels, a kraken parting the seas. Tendons snap and cartilage cracks, skins they tear, and breaking backs. Bodies flail and split down the middle, they fall apart like wind to thistle, through SoHo, Battery Park and Bleecker Street. The East Village, Times Square and Wall Street, the epicenters of culture and the world economy-  I’ll make them all bleed. The man in the corner of the street, stark naked and raving mad, the void of his voice grieves all the things he once had, I’ll ease his pain, bring him a salve.  

Life is so hard. Why shackle ourselves? Put an end to this here madness. 

I'll walk down stairwell houses and elevator shafts, all the while the teeth of my blade slashes that which crosses my path in half. The false charm of cornice stone and the crooked acanthus of Corinthian columns- I’ll paint them red from looming black. The pinheads of skyscrapers, and the steeples of churches all topple on their backs. Heathens, liars, and thieves- the lot of them, I see it, I see it all and then, I’ll chop, slice, and maim them- the whole lot of them, put an end to these here vermin. Vindictive bastards and wall street cats, cut them up and trim the fat, mangled guts stringing down streets, lining up pavements, streaming over trees. KILL THEM, KILL THEM ALL, THE LOT OF THEM. I’ll kill them all, not one left back. Slicing, dicing and slashing their meats, I lay siege upon the cancer of humanity, upon these lecherous lice and sorry leftovers of what could’ve beens and never will bes. The mortars thunder and buildings splinter, the napalm seeps through their veins, how the poppies bleed. I watch their little lives all plead, novocaine dreams, narcotic schemes. There are funeral pyres burning in these streets. I’ll ride down the subway trenches, the torrent stains tiled wall-art and slaps against cold hard steel. The blood gushes down subway tracks, drowning, drowning subway rats, I’ll split open subway cars full of apex predators and wall street cats. The massacre follows suit, toppling, turning- how the bodies reel. I’ll put an end to these subterranean blues. 

And how they all bleed. carmine tides wash over, the cobblestones sprout poppyfields,  the spines of the spine-less bend backwards to a Pythagorean degree, I summon upon thee a crimson baptism- purified, free.

There’s nothing left anymore. Nihilo sanctum estne? Nothing but a giant cosmic joke. Ain’t that the cosmic way? All the contusions, concussions, fractures, broken backs and pulverizations. This is no warzone, nay, this is the compassion of tortured animals euthanized. I’ll leave behind plague pits, mass graves- a catacomb lined with drain pipes. 

The city becomes me, with this haemorrhaging stomach-pit of New York City. 

I undo the clotting of these lives, tumors, cancers metastasized. I grant you this gift, hell or heaven follow, freedom garnered still,

I do you this mercy. with this Bloodletting of the arteries of New York City.

………………………………………………………… Footnote: Streamofconsciousness Originally completed 11042021. Deleted due to negative vibes. Reposting for Transparency

[darklcy]

15 and 2 with armin

oof this one's gonna bite இ_இ but thank you for the request!! (this calls coming from inside the house and i mightve gotten emotional while writing this buuut i hope you all enjoy and maybe cry w me lol <3)

᠃ ⚘᠂ ⚘ angst prompt list ˚ attack on titan masterlist ⚘ ᠂ ⚘ ᠃

→ prompt : s/o storming out the house : "just fucking leave me alone."

→ pairing : armin arlert x reader | Attack on Titan

→ warnings : takes place in S4, swearing & yelling

→ word count : 1.2k

You didn't know where you went wrong.

What bump in the road you wreaked to lead to this demise. All sense of worth, love, and respect you harbored towards yourself filtered out the window the second he swatted you away as if you were a mere fly, not his lover he slept beside each night.

The painful gnawing bubbles in your stomach pushed the threat of bile as you stared at him with hot tears in your eyes, lips resting in a pout and body littered in trembles.

You were tired of this. Tired of all the yelling, all the damage, all the insults thrown your way. In the bottom of it all, you were just trying to show your love.

Some say it's dangerous to fall in love young. Others say it's dumb to be in love in the midst of a war. Your older relatives laughed when you mentioned your recent plans of moving in with Armin, stating it was far too early in your relationship for that. That couples' true colors reveal themselves upon living together too early in their affairs. While on the other side, your comrades uttered teasings under their breaths about you two living in a damned relationship, shadowed by his curse of limited life and threat of death.

You and Armin looked past the condescending jokes. Despite the war and tragedies, you were just happy to be able to wake up to each other at last. Having shared mutual feelings since the early years of military life, your relationship was ready to soar to the next intimate level of domestic life. Unfortunately for you two though, living a simple life as a soldier can only bring so much.

Armin tended to lash out whenever his stress tipped over. He knew he had to release it before that happened, that he was working on it with his therapist once a week. You tried to give him the benefit of the doubt in the beginning, but as it became more consistent, you wondered if you had any input to his complexity.

Were you one of the reasons for his overwhelming anger? Did he come to despise living with you? Had you not given him enough?

Self ridden reassurance can only take you so far. With Armin not giving you any, it was hard to put a smile on your face and claim you weren't the problem. Because there was no way Armin was, he was your beloved. Your partner. You loved him so much, you never wanted to think ill of him.

But maybe that was the problem.

Armin pulled and twisted at his blonde tresses in front of you, pacing violently around the kitchen. All you could do was watch and silently weep, wondering what monsters lured in his mind to take control of his actions and spill these lashings towards you.

"[First] I..." He took a deep breath. "Please, just-just go away.."

He was shutting you out again. When his blue eyes flitted to yours, you shook your head and bit your lip. He groaned and slammed his hand onto the nearest tabletop. You finally found the courage to speak up.

"Armin, please. I'm here, talk to me."

"No, you don't fucking get it! I...I-I can't deal with this. I can't deal with you right now."

A pang. You sniffled and swiped a hair behind your ear. His uneven breathing patterns were the only noise in the room as he grounded himself with the table beside him, both palms widespread on the wood.

"...I can't do this. I can't do this, [First] I need you to leave, please."

"Is it something I'm doing?"

Armin froze. You stared right back at him, brows pushed together as you studied him. He faintly shook his head.

"..No, hon this isn't about us at all. I'm just really, really overwhelmed right now."

"Yes, but am I putting in any input to that? Is our relationship a contribute to your stress..?"

Armin clenched his eyes shut and turned away from you. "[First] please!"

A sob left your mouth. "I'm just trying to help you. I love you, Armin, and I want to help-,"

"You really want to help?!" His eyes met yours again, wide and wild with thousands of emotions.

"Yes! That's what I've been trying to tell you!"

He moved to stand right in front of you, chests barely grazing each other and his heavy breaths puffing over your skin. The muscles under his brows twitched as he observed your tears and frantic pleas, before he huffed an exhale through his nostrils. For a split second you swore you detected shame in his ocean colored irises, but before you could look any further he parted his lips.

"....Then give me some time to think.. For now, just fucking leave me alone."

Another sharp pang, impaling your heart and shattering it into pieces. Without another glance your way, he stomped out the room and threw open the front door, not caring about the way it slammed back into the house. The sound echoed throughout the empty rooms, emphasizing the brutal reminder you were now the sole resident.

Your legs couldn't hold you up anymore. Crumbling to the ground, you wept harshly into your hands, crying out sobs and yells until your throat grew sore. You wondered where in the loving relationship you shared with Armin did it become so south, did it steer off the right path into a decent of insanity. You missed the warmth and security Armin used to give you. The whispers of sweet nothings he voiced inside your ear while holding you close.

A few years ago, when the two of you were still youthful, naive teenagers, Armin would've never imagined speaking to you the way he did mere seconds ago. He hated himself even more for it, hating the cold guilt and sobs it rung up. One of these days he'd make it up to you, that is, if you were still willing to love him after those harsh unforgiving words.

He can only hope the love you held for him was strong enough to fight off those monsters in his brain that reminded him everyday how it should've been Erwin instead of him. That told him how worthless he was, and how undeserving he was of your affections.

As much as he could Armin fended them off, but recently they'd been tipping him over the edge at every small inconvenience. All you did was speak to him and he was gone. What did that mean for your relationship..? He refused to entertain those intrusive images. The thought of you no longer being in his life like this frightened his every nerve. He cursed himself as a tear tickled his skin, promising himself to show you his apologies tonight when he returned.

When your hollowed out sobs finally came to an end, you sat up and stared at the closed door, silently wishing for him to come home. But as the echoes of his last words rang in your brain, you found yourself wishing for him to stay away for just a bit longer.

Some say it's dangerous to fall in love young. You used to mock that ideology, claiming it to be incorrect on all levels. But now, as you cleaned your face with a wet towel, you were beginning to believe it.

#attack on titan #aot #shingeki no kyojin #armin #armin arlert #armin x reader #armin arlert x reader #aot x reader #attack on titan x reader #armin x reader angst #angst #angst prompt #darklcy prompt list #x reader #x reader angst #attack on titan angst #scenario #aot armin arlert #attack on titan armin #attack on titan armin arlert

[everafterkeiji]

Song: drivers license by Olivia Rodrigo

Summary: How the flashing lights in the street bring you to the moment that was once yours and Oikawas.

Parings: Tooru Oikawa x fem! reader

Word count: 7.3k

Genre: angst

A/N: fuck it honestly, self control we don't know her boo, pls be careful with the flashbacks and little details, enjoy pt. 1 <33

next

"Can't you give me just one more kiss?" Oikawa begs, leaning his arm behind your seat as you see his irresistible pout resting on his lips. You chuckle before leaning close to him and him copying your actions.

Lips lingering with each other, as he removes his arm behind you to ghost upon your cheek. It was so intoxicating, a distance too great that was covered in tension. He glides his finger through your lips before resting it on your chin.

"Run away with me."

He states, closing his eyes and leaning his forehead to yours with a shaky sigh, his hand now running through the hair from the back of your neck. You smile at his words, caressing his arm, shutting your eyes like he did, embracing his warmth in his car.

"And we'd go everywhere?"

"Everywhere, any time, you name it babe." He whispers with desperation in his tone. This close. Why can't he hold you like this forever? A tear nearly escapes his eye as he cherishes your touch. Why did he have to lose contact with his true self?

He opens his eyes to see yours closed and in full serenity. He bites his lip before allowing the tears to cast down his cheeks. He tried not to sniffle so you'd let this moment last without any trace of pain.

"In that case, I'm not driving."

You joked, making him let out a soft laugh as he wipes his tears before you can see. Instead, he leans in finally breaking the distance between you two. You kissed back, not knowing his cheeks were tear stained as he lets his lips tell his apology. This wasn't him, this wasn't a kiss that could last more than once.

He hesitantly pulls away as you caress his cheeks as he leans into your touch, melting in the skin he's adored every inch of. He takes in the way you stared at him, the lights of the passing cars glowing on your face as his hands shakes at the sight of you.

He wished the silence wouldn't give out how painful it was to watch you like this, so with a disguise, he smiles.

"You'll be able to in the future." He says, earning him an ache to surround his heart. You intertwine your hands with his, your thumb assuring him since you've noticed a change in his aura.

"Maybe, but it's still you and me right?"

His eyes wander around his car, reminiscing on each memory that you've made in just a vehicle. Every moment where you'd leave the window open, freedom in your clutch. Every time your voices were close to being gone from furiously shouting the lyrics. All the times you'd rather sleep in his car and run from your problems. Even the random placements of clothes from the two of you, to scattered photographs and snack wrappers.

Just one more, Tooru.

"You and me, love. That's all it takes. "

You let your head rest on his shoulder as he turns on the engine, surprising you with your hands still intertwined with his.

"What'd you say babe? One last drive?"

You nod happily as he chuckles looking at you before driving, his facade weakening with every mile.

One more.

-

"Pick up, Tooru!" You shout, aggressively clicking the button on your phone as each call was heard with his voice mail. You threw the phone to the floor as you let out a scream, your throat begging you to stop torturing yourself.

"Pick up!" You scream once again before lying down on the bed, not giving a care that your sobs echoed outside his apartment. Your cheeks were warm, with heavy eyes and mascara staining the pillow cases. Tears nonstop with the crumpled paper in your hand. Shaking uncontrollably as you denied what he's done.

Running to your door, the breeze greeting your legs since you wore his hoodie to sleep and little shorts to cover the weather. Frantically turning left and right to reach the entrance of the building.

You let your hand cover your mouth as you see his car nowhere in your sight. You gripped on the handle of the door to steady yourself from falling, with your sob catching the attention of strangers.

"Y/N! Fuck- I'm here- hey I'm here."

Clouded with water, you barely recognize the person who was hugging you tightly. Falling to the rough surface of the ground, he joined you in your downfall and it seemed that nothing made sense anymore. The noise of the world drifted far from you as the only sound that replayed was his words, and you despised it.

How come it was only you?

"Y/N- I got you, it's okay now." Iwaizumi whispers but you shook your head punching his back as you fell into a state you didn't know Oikawa could put you in, solitude.

Iwaizumi hated hearing you cuss at the universe. It still scares him the way the color was drained out of your body when he saw you got out of the apartment looking like an absolute tragedy. Your punches felt numb to him but he couldn't ignore how painful it was to hear you scream Oikawa names, and for him to desperately come back.

"W-why-" You couldn't form the words properly since you were having trouble breathing. Iwaizumi carried you in his arms since he noticed your knee had been scraped, as he tried his hardest not to fall in rage for his best friend.

"I'll be here. C'mon, let's calm you down yeah?" He assures you making you nod, left with no energy but what remained was your heart torn by the person you loved the most.

-

You woke up to Iwaizumis voice making you shift in the sheets, mistaking him for your Tooru. When you opened your eyes, you didn't see your favorite pair of brown eyes instead you were face to face with the same hue but a different person.

"Y/N- hey I got somewhere to go to today but I made breakfast, is that okay?" He asks softly, a comforting hand to your shoulder. You nod as he smiles standing up to open the curtains now that you were wide awake.

"Thank you, Hajime." You bid him as he sits down on the bed, beside you. You turn to where he is and stare at him, overwhelmed with how he chose to stay.

"I'll be gone for half the day." He states as you sit up slowly, rubbing your eyes.

"I've never seen a birds nest this up close before." He jokes making you glare at him before punching his shoulder as he laughs.

"Says the fucking spikey ass hair." You threw back as he laughs, delighted that your past self was resurfacing every now and then.

"What about you? Don't you have any plans today?" He asks as you check your phone. You sigh as you saw the reminder on your phone as he takes a peak and his heart drops at it.

"It's nothing."

"You have to go. "

"It doesn't matter anymore."

"Okay now put your foot here babe." You obeyed Oikawas words as he pecks your cheek. Before you could insert the key in, he stops you. Questioning him, he turns to you with a smug smirk before leaning close to your lips.

You expected him to kiss you the way that he does but instead he pulls away before strapping you in, putting your safety first before kissing you. He laughs at how you were clearly upset that he lead you on. He strapped himself in as well.

"You'll get that kiss if we make it out here alive." He jokes as you gasp in betrayal, making him stick out his tongue, still taunting you.

"I'm kidding baby! But you will get that kiss when we reach that pole over there." You glanced to where he was pointing as you sighed in relief at how easy it was. Turning on the engine, he smiles at how eager you were to succeed.

"Then I'll get us there."

"Y/N-" he bites his lips before he could throw you something he'd regret. You look to him, wondering why he became silent. Clicking in your mind that he's being careful with his words since Oikawa left, you leaned your head on his arm.

"I know, Iwa. I'm sorry." You apologized so suddenly, surprising him that you'd catch up on his behavior. He shakes his head before wrapping his arm around yours, just like he always would.

"I know how much this means to you. Hate me for saying this, but he'd be proud to see you get it." He says, making you smile at how honest he was. If he were here, he'd immediately bring you to your favorite restaurant and go all out just because you aced it. To others, it'd look like another step into growing up, learning how to drive and how to maintain the quality of the car.

It wouldn't be this important if his words didn't paint you perfect memories.

"You know what makes me so excited?" Oikawa asks as you continued to run your fingers through his brown locks. His head was laid on your lap as he draws constellations in the air, smiling to himself.

"What is it babe?"

"I'll get my drivers license." You whispered as Iwaizumi pats your hair, happy that you managed to push yourself through that cloud of sorrow.

"Okay that is extremely random, Tooru." You chuckled but he shakes his head before sitting up to meet with you. Slowly, he pulls you into his lap as you wrap your arms around his neck as his hand loosely finds its home to your waist.

"We don't have to wait anymore, think about it." He asks making you focus on what he's hinting to. Once he realizes you couldn't figure it out, he chuckles before pulling you to him gently. Your heart beating too quickly for you to even realize that it felt normal for you to be this dangerously close to him.

"We can come home to each other."

At first you questioned why he was so worked up in teaching you how to drive and finally getting your drivers license, but now it was too clear for you and you hated it.

"Call me when you get it ok? Maybe by dinner we can celebrate?" Iwaizumi suggests as you nod, genuinely smiling that he was there to celebrate with you. You immediately wrap your arms around him as he does the same, closing his eyes, proud of you.

"You got this." He whispers as you embraced him longer, desperately wanting to cry at how thankful you were for him. Iwaizumi feels a flush to his cheeks as he pulls away, fearful of the pace of his heart.

"Well don't get my shirt wet with your tears again- I need to look presentable!" He jokes make you wipes your eyes as he smiles when he hears your laugh.

-

Hajime: I'm sorry I can't make it tonight, Y/N. I'll promise I'll make it up to you by morning.

That was the message that was sent to you hours ago yet here at 11pm, you were staring at the movie in the ceiling. Oikawa insisted buying a projector for the two of you to enjoy movies in the comfort of your own space. So using it now felt nostalgic remembering how much he loved this movie.

Sighing, you sat up as you lift the drink to your lips, relieved at the sensation of alcohol entering your mouth. It's been a while since you've got a hold of it. Iwaizumi being protective of the amount you could consume while he was gone so he kept the alcohol cabinet away from you. He promised that he'd allow you to drink once a month because he was indeed worried for your health if you allowed yourself to drink everyday.

On this day, you chose to ask him if it'd be okay to drink. Understanding the pain that you were in, he agreed. Before he went away, he got the key and unlocked the cabinet handing you your favorite drink. You thanked him as usual, now being satisfied with being alone with a bottle of liquor that could temporarily drown the pain.

Hearing a smack from where the projector was set up, the bright lights of the ending movie flashed through your eyes so you shield yourself from it. You immediately turn your back to the projector that was now facing you since it's lost it balance from your previous angle.

The credits rolled in as you reached for your laptop to stop the screening but then another video plays, making you read the date of the video.

"Hello! Unfortunately I'm still here in the car but I'm making this video as proof if I died, it's because of my girlfriend right here who can't drive properly."

It's him.

Turning your attention to the video playing in front of you. You scoot to the left so your silhouette doesn't create a barrier while you watched.

You had a hand to your mouth, lost at words for this unexpected video to play. His voice immediately brought you to tears as you gripped the pillow beside you as your laughter in the video echoed in the background.

"For the record- I'm learning so get this camera away from me, Tooru!" You defended yourself as Oikawa looks at the camera before rolling his eyes.

"On this episode, I'm teaching her how to park! So wish me good luck- maybe prepare a casket for my car." You immediately slap his shoulder as he lets a loud laugh. He sets the camera in a better landscape angle.

You smiled at his teases. It struck you how much you missed his little remarks that would always make your day. Wiping the tears from your eyes, you watched the way he looks at you as you tried to figure out which direction to turn to. His stare was one of the things many people wished they could experience.

A look as if you were the reason they believed in love and how endless it was.

Surprisingly, in your last drive, he still looked at you the same way.

Your chest tightens as you fell for his illusion. It felt like it'd be an eternity for you to move on from how he looked that night. You should've asked him why a tear landed on your clothes, why was his fingers cold and trembling? You thought that his kiss felt like the one you'd receive when you finally hear the priest bid you two as husband and wife but it was a kiss that held farewell in secret.

"Would you look at that! I'm alive and barely a scratch on my car so far- good job baby!" He cheers engulfing you in his arms. You swarmed him in sweet and tiny kisses as he giggles at each one before placing a delicate to your lips, closing his eyes as you pull him closer placing your hand on his cheek.

You wondered if there was something that could hold you back from how much you allowed yourself to endure the pain this long. Moving closer to the wall, your chest heavily coming up and down, difficulty in finding a way to breathe properly.

Kneeling to reach him, you let your hand touch the wall as your hand lands in Oikawas face as he laughs at something you said in the video. You felt how you closed your eyes and reminiscing on what it felt like to hold him in your hands again. His soft lips, his skin that warms you up during your cuddles, his hair that would be snuggled in your neck when he embraced you.

"I love you, Y/N."

He says, leading you to sob as you turned away from the wall, the light of the projector passing through you as you dropped to the bed with knees to your chest, the walls of the room was familiarized with your cries again.

You felt every part of you crumble as you continued to scream, having another miserable night. You'd rise from your knee from time to time to gasp for air from the unstable breathing.

You felt like a stranger to him.

That alone was enough for you to be swallowed by darkness once again.

-

How careless was he to assume you'd give him a call?

You're probably out with Iwaizumi celebrating and driving freely with him. Oikawa sighs as he removes the reminder from his phone as he takes another punch to the steering wheel as he feels the irony hit him that he's jealous of his best friend.

For someone who has been with you since you went to Aoba Johsai, Iwaizumi would've been perfect for you, Oikawa thinks. To keep you grounded, to take his position in making you the happiest.

He's everything Oikawa is but the difference is that Iwaizumi was the one who could give you more, and importantly, he stayed.

And nothing scared the setter more than to lose you to a person that can truly love you more than he ever could.

Though it feels like he's defeated already.

"Sir! Good morning, this is Oikawa from room 104?" He greets through the phone as the man smiles fondly at the sweet boy who he's seen chasing around in the hallway with his girlfriend.

"Ah! Mr. Oikawa! I barely see you nowadays what happened?" Oikawa sighs, running a hand through his hair, debating on what answer to give to the landlord.

"I've been okay sir, I just called to ask about the payment due-"

"No worries Oikawa-kun, the man took care of it for this month!"

Man?

"E-excuse me sir?"

His heart was beating too loudly at the sudden information. What man? He feels sweat rushing to him, heavily anxious of what happened to you and his apartment.

"Hajime was it? Ah anyway he's covered it this time!"

Iwaizumi?

It felt as if he was struck down by force as he drops to his couch with his mouth agape and eyes widened with his heart raging too fast for his liking. He let out a gasp, putting each piece into its place as he feels a swift of the threatening atmosphere surround him, along with anger.

"H-he's my friend sir- does he stop by often?" He asks, biting his fingers in anxiousness. With his other hand, he reaches for a pillow, gripping it tightly like he'd want it to collapse in his hand.

"Often? He lives there silly. I was honestly surprised you'd let him but I guess young love isn't for everyone, son."

He didn't even notice that he's thrown the pillow all the way across the room as he stands up, his phone held tightly in his hands, wanting nothing more than to be slammed to the floor but with sourness in his tone, regret in his heart then he replies.

"You're right."

After that day, even if it's been months since he was informed, he chose to feel numb but there was a tug on his heart at the thought of Iwaizumi taking care of you. You deserved every ounce of effort that the ace gives you. Oikawa is more than thankful that Iwaizumi was there to wipe your tears and embrace you since he was the one to cause you this overwhelming amount of pain.

But he didn't expect this.

"Iwa-chan, how are you?" He asks with envy hidden from his true intentions of calling him. Iwaizumi stretches, tired from the workout as he answers the boy.

"I'm tired. What about you?" Oikawa lets out a mocking laugh as he leans on the couch, hands behind his head but both hands were formed into fists as he converses with him.

"I'm sure Y/N is there to patch you up huh?" He exclaims making Iwaizumi sit up, nervous at the outburst but then he looks at the apartment, seeing your sleeping state on the couch, and he sighs. Oikawa was bound to know sooner or later.

"I'm sorry Oikawa but-"

"Hajime that's my apartment!"

"And she was your girl wasn't she? But where are you right now!"

He was at lost for words, like the life of him was knocked out of him, deeply taking in Iwaizumis words. It was unhealthy with how much he was shaking and how he felt so cold and empty. On the other end, Hajime bites his lip, suddenly regretting his words but he can't turn back knowing it struck a nerve to Oikawa.

"Oikawa, listen to me." Iwaizumi starts as the setter was left to no other option then to obey since he couldn't think of anything else to respond to him.

"I know you love her but you're never going to be there for her. You asked me to go to her when you left and it's been a year. I know it's a dick move to move in with her but I don't trust her when she's alone. If you ask her, it feels like it's been forever so I'm just- being there for her cause she needs me."

He hated how right he was. If he would be honest, leaving you alone would be the least appropriate thing to do. All he can hear was your screams and imagining the way you look made his heart throb with too many emotions.

What made him lose was the fact that he can come back with hundreds of medals, but he'll never have you.

And Iwaizumi was more than ready to win.

-

He was surprised to see you awake at 12am but seeing how distraught you were, he couldn't help but want to end the day with you smiling or at least a reaction where he'd feel his heart flutter at the sight of it so he sighs before asking.

"Wanna go for a drive?"

The question that left you with so much trauma, sounded so soft when Hajime said it bringing a new feeling to it. It didn't sound like an unfulfilled promise and you nod to him knowing he could never hurt you the way Oikawa did.

Maybe it was best for you to escape the apartment.

Spending time with Iwaizumi as you drove around made you realize that there was a world where you can enjoy life without wondering about him.

Or maybe because it was suffocating.

Being in your apartment and Iwaizumi moving in with you was something your heart can never handle. To this day, you couldn't put into words how you despised that Iwaizumi had to care for you so much, even letting him living with you for a year. You admired the way he's known you since high school and now that you all had to choose different paths but he still took the one that had you in it since Tooru left you stranded.

With every tear that left your eyes, he was one step ahead to wipe them away and comfort you with his embrace. His patience when he sees you passed out on the couch from binge watching a series you were never really interested in, even to bringing you to random events just to spark your interest like you had back in school. Taking the time for you to fully open yourself to him by sharing your memories with Oikawa and why you've gained an attachment to his white car that held too many memories for you to just let go instantly.

At first, Iwaizumi wanted to laugh at how simple it was. What was so special about these late night drives and basic driving lessons from him? Wasn't that just one of the little things included in a relationship?

But then he sees the way you'd always ask him to put the windows down and how you preferred driving at night, driving without a specific location. Even when you'd clung to the seatbelt when he'd drive in the rain. He was more than curious. There were so many questions in his head but he had to give you some space knowing these memories course through your heart and mind everyday.

Now looking at you as you leaned on the seat with a solemn look on your face, he realizes how heavy it was for you to drive like this, without him by your side.

"He's proud of you, you know?" Iwaizumi whispers as you shift your body to face him, leaning your head on the seat.

"If only that was true." You whispered as he shakes his head before hesitantly sets his hand on your knee as a way of reassurance.

"I never understood it at first but now I guess it makes a fuck lot of sense why you didn't wanna get your drivers license." He comments, making you nod drunkenly.

"Because what's a journey without him?"

Iwaizumi then shifts his body like you did, fully invested in whatever you had to say feeling like this was finally the moment where you'd let him just how bad were those memories embedded in you.

"He used to say- that the best part of getting my license was that distance can never be a problem but says the asshole who's fucking miles away huh?" Iwaizumi knew that even if it was a joke, you held nothing but the truth. He sees the way your eyes didn't hold a sparkle anymore when Oikawas name was mentioned or just the sight of him. You didn't look like the lovesick fool back in high school, that made Iwaizumi realize how love makes such an impact on a person.

"I don't even know who to come home to anymore."

"You have me."

Iwaizumi boldly confesses as your eyes gaze at him, wide eyed at his statement. How come it held something that you could never figure out? Realizing that he held his heart in his hands, he switches the tone of his voice, finding it hard to fight the urge to be real with himself.

"As your friend, idiot. Plus, I don't trust you around cup noodles." He adds, trying to clear the tension that surrounded the two of you. Smiling at him, you close your eyes, wondering why it felt right to be in this moment. You felt your self drown in intoxication as you took him by surprise as you let your hand rest on his cheek as Iwaizumi flinches at the sudden contact but finds himself accepting it, ignoring the pleas of his thoughts to back away.

"Don't fall in love with my broken pieces, Hajime. You deserve someone who is- complete."

You let a tear slip from your eyes as it mixed with exhaustion as Iwaizumi lets out an anxious breath as he takes in every word you said.

Yet there he was picking every piece of you wherever you went, admiring each of them.

Before he could answer, he felt your hand slip away from his skin and he turns to see you asleep. He gently puts you back in your seat, putting on your seatbelt as he frustratedly runs his fingers through his dark hair as he feels the trembling of his fingers. Hands to the steering wheel, gripping it knowing he's betrayed his own promise.

Opening his phone to check the time, what flashes before him was a photo of the three of you when you graduated. He sees Oikawa with a hand to your waist, grinning brightly at the camera while you had your eyes closed with a smile, holding out a peace sign. His eyes linger on Oikawa before he watches over your figure on the passenger seat.

Lastly, he throws his head back before glancing at Oikawa in the picture, closing his eyes before painfully whispering to himself.

"I've never felt this way for no one."

He then shuts his phone as he turns on the engine, hoping that this isn't the night where he'll regret leaving his heart open.

-

"Don't overthink it." Iwaizumi whispers as you sniffle in his arms, he let his hands play with your hair as he removes the phone from your hands. Why did it have to be so early? It's 10am, both of you were utterly exhausted from the night before, one of you experiencing a heavy hang over, and the other just extremely tired from his racing thoughts.

Unfortunately, Hajime found you sat up frantically on the bed as he quickly stepped in just to see an image of a post from one of Oikawas fan pages. Spotted in multiple places were the one and only Oikawa Tooru, accompanied by a certain blonde. Captured in photos were segments of them in a café holding hands, smiles plastered on either lips. Which lead him to sit beside you and embrace you, seeing that your luck was purely running out.

You hated how in each photo, he looked painfully happy. Even if you were meant to skip the photo, how could you when this was real evidence that he's promises were turning into thin air the more you look at it. After a year of constant aches and wasted tears, here he was smiling, which you envied until the end.

"God- she's tall, gorgeous, I can never-" Iwaizumi shushes you as you wiped you tears as they continuously ran through his sweats. Iwaizumi leans his head on yours, sighing as he prepares himself, wishing that you'd realize that not enough words were there to describe how beautiful you were.

"Don't try to tell yourself that you can't compare to her- because you're all he could ever want. "

"Shit, I'm so sorry. " Iwaizumi says as he watches a figure pick up the ball that landed next to her, a ball that was spiked by him, almost hitting her directly. You turn around, the ball in your hands with a smile.

"No it's fine!" You say but Iwaizumi was struck with the view of you. You hand the ball to him but the beating of his heart was as loud as fireworks during New Years. He knows you, of course he does. Oikawa never stops ranting about you anyway, showing him multiple photos of you, completely bragging about the fact that he's got you to himself.

And fuck- you were prettier than what the pixels display you in the setters phone, you had the ace momentarily blank at your presence.

How lucky. He thinks.

"Iwaizumi was it? I'm Y/N!" You reach your hand out as he smiles at you, taking in your hand shaking it lightly, as he stared at your eyes and admired the way your lips were tugged in a beautiful smile.

So this is her. He says to himself and the feeling washes away when Oikawa walks up to greet you with a kiss to your cheek. Turning away, he shrugs his shoulders returning to play.

She's his.

"Believe me that Oikawa can never look at anyone else the way he does with you." He puts your face in between his hands, wiping your tears as you sobbed holding onto his him. Iwaizumi wanted to scream at how the world kept pushing you through your limit.

Seeing the images felt like the universe added salt to your open wounded heart. It felt like your heart was progressively being tossed around like it was nothing. How come everyday felt like you weren't given a chance to be at peace? How come the moment you felt the tiniest amount of calmness was being in the car with Iwaizumi and then the next day you were back to zero all over again.

The image of yourself was already broken when you let yourself completely fall for the insecurities, but how can you rise from all of it? When it was clear that she was all you ever wanted to be.

"Hey, why don't we take a break? For real now, Y/N. Let's just put the phone down and- rest." Iwaizumi whispers, caressing your cheek as you closed your eyes, desperate to remove all trace of emotion. You wanted to blur out the world even for a second and Iwaizumi could promise you a silence worth more than you could ever want.

Your lungs were giving out, every muscle in your body, every function. It felt like any time you could collapse from the lack of sleep, the lack of proper nutrients, the lack of a smile. Your confidence was down to one as you held onto Iwaizumis words, drifting off into what he said before about Oikawa.

If all that he could ever want was you, how come you didn't feel like you weren't what he needed?

-

"You know that you're just being an asshole at this point, Tooru." Iwaizumi says as Oikawa sighs at the other end of the line. The blonde casually looks over to the setter as she takes a sip of her coffee. Oikawa leans on the pillow as he chooses his words wisely.

"How is she?" He asks, he can imagine the way Iwaizumi would roll his eyes, followed by a disappointed scoff. Oikawa knew the way your mind would work, and it never grew on him how every motion of his would bring destruction to you in any shape or form.

"What do you think? She's fucking crying again."

Even if there was a pinch to his heart, he simply took a deep breath to sustain how painful it was.

"Who is she, Oikawa?" Iwaizumi asks desperately. Oikawa turns to the girl sat in the dinner table as she meekly smiles unknowing she was the certain topic of the two best friends. The setter tiredly runs his hand over his face, wondering if there could be a way that he can exit without stepping on you and Iwaizumis heart.

"You owe me at least one explanation. If you can't give me one, then I'll be-"

"I'm ready. I'll tell you who she is."

And with the following sentences, the ace felt his ears ring along with a ruined heart.

-

Driving has never felt so rueful before but with every passing mile, all Oikawa wanted to do was stop and turn to where you were.

With a stab to his heart, he promised himself that he can never come back until he's found the silence in his mind.

"This is for us. I'll be better, Y/N. I'll come home to you- and I hope you can wait."

Those words may seem like they were directed to you but Tooru can feel himself stand small to his own declaration. He knows you're willing to wait for god knows how long, but he's indecisive if he has the power to wait for this emptiness that surrounds him.

He couldn't allow the rage in his soul to sit around and act like he's deaf to the screams of it. He needed to stop the sensation of his hands missing the way the ball was placed in it and how each serve leaves a breathtaking reaction on any crowd. The hole in his heart was too big enough for him to ignore, and he'd allow anyone to call him selfish knowing it was the inescapable truth.

Hearing all your voice messages to him the following morning had his heart begging for release. Every crack in your voice had him tipping over the edge. He deserved it- god he deserved it more than anyone else because he would have never heard such pain if he didn't book a flight to Argentina.

"Tooru, baby what happened? Please tell me this is a joke."

"Please fucking answer I need you- god Oikawa please!"

"Come back to me, Tooru- I'll do anything please."

"I love y-you, but I guess you've changed your mind huh?"

"Tooru, let's go home yeah?" A soft voice calls out for him as he averts his gaze to her. He sees how his bags were packed as well her tiny suitcase next to her, all dressed up to go. He stands up from where he is, gripping the handle of the luggage as the girl turns to him with such worry.

It was usual for the girl to awake him from his thoughts and he was thankful that she was brought to him, helping him in ways he could never imagine. She was a mere light in his street, a guide in his moonlight trips, and this was finally the moment to stop the waiting.

He takes a look at his apartment, before landing his eyes on the blonde girl who was tying her hair. He smiles fondly as he's felt the adrenaline to finally move again.

"Yeah, let's go."

TWO DAYS LATER ; 9:16PM

"Hajime, stop fucking around!" You laughed as you continued to drive. What a breather it was, to drive with somebody who brought warmth to the passenger seat. Previously, Iwaizumi tested your so called driving skills as he purposely flicks your forehead from time to time for no absolute reason.

You two were on your way home from a movie and Iwaizumi was the star that had grabbed your heart the entire night. He was pulling these jokes, making you cackle to no extent, threatening you that if you'd lose the arcade game one of you will have to forcefully wash the dishes for a week, of course both wouldn't back down.

Maybe for the first time, Oikawa has never visited your mind.

And damn did it feel good.

The part that you found pieces of yourself slowly gathering as you were introduced into a new way of light, it felt too good to be true. Felt like each piece was slowly coming all back together because Iwaizumi was the glue that got you together, it may take a long time to fully be fixed, but the ace proved to you his promise.

You're finally resting.

After the anger that rose above you, Iwaizumi stayed confident to his promise of finally giving you a break you well deserved. He fulfilled you days without technology to shield yourself from any knives from the social world, got you out of bed to watch the sunrise with you, left you places to visit while he was out for his internship. This was more than you could ever ask for.

It felt like flowers were decorating your lungs, heart was slowly being treated with a smile, and laughter that radiated growth.

All because of Iwaizumi.

Now there's a new feeling that has unlocked in your heart and you could feel the burn of it when you noticed how everything felt so light. Unlike before where every step felt too heavy for you to carry on, now that weight is being lifted off by Hajime.

And nothing feels better than that.

-

Inserting your hands into the pocket of your hoodie, you shivered in the nights embrace. Once Hajime has fallen asleep on the couch, you decided to take a stroll and your feet lead you to a place you've yet to visit in a year.

It was a walk meant for you to clear your head, to settle if everything was going to be permanent because you had to know which part of the moments you wanted to hold onto.

This was entirely a mistake- to stroll around his neighborhood like it was always welcoming you with open arms. All the things you wanted to decide on felt like it vanished once you became familiar with the turns of his car when it drove to this place.

This is where it all began. The lessons, the confessions, the blossoming of love, everything. It doesn't matter how many times you try to deny it, this place will always make your heart bleed at how noxious it was. You can never hate the way chills ran up your spine because of how they all rushed to your mind as fast as light.

It's truly a crime to despise how love is formed.

With the sight of his house, a smile creeps on your face remembering your last interaction in this household.

"This is my lovely, Y/N." He sweetly introduces you as you respectfully bowed but you were taken by surprise when you were hugged by his mom, making your boyfriend laugh at your crazed expression. You lose this tenseness when you felt how endearing she was as you gained courage to gently wrap your arms around her too.

"Welcome honey! I've been wanting to meet you so badly since this twat never shuts up about you." She says earning a pout from your boyfriend and a giggle from you. You turn to his dad smiling softly, as he reciprocates your gesture.

"Might as well get used to the house babe, you'll be an Oikawa soon."

You felt your heart clench with his words and you avert your eyes on the road instead. Finding it hard to sustain the bite of how it all turned into a pile of lies.

"No, mom! Please don't embarrass me like that."

You hear a voice shout out making you jolt from your previous stance.

Meanwhile, Iwaizumi awakens with a groan as his phone dings with every second. As he grumpily opens his phone, he was greeted by a flood of messages coming from a certain setter making him sit up and frantic to reach for you. Seeing your door that was wide open, he lets out a gasp as he fidgets for the door, cussing himself at the situation.

"Fuck, Y/N please no."

You suppressed your sobs with a tight hand to your mouth as you felt your feet gain the urge to ran away but your mind demanded you to stay to finally awaken you in this false hope you've been holding onto.

A silhouette of his tall now much more bulky figure was stood next to more of a petite on with hair tied in a ponytail. Wiping your eyes to sharpen your vision, it hit you like a grenade at war.

There he was, proudly introducing the girl that's haunted your dreams.

Oikawa was smiling brightly at her as you watched her look at him with the same expression.

He's right there with someone who isn't you and can never be you.

"You and me, love. That's all it takes."

"Tooru." You whispered as if you'd ever get the chance to let him notice your cries. God, it was unbearable. No words came to your mind, no beating of your heart, it was all gone because the only thing that will forever linger in your mind is the sight of the person you waited so long to come home to, has gone and found the perfect replacement.

Her.

Another glance meant like a sword heading straight to your heart in one swing so you finally decide to turn your back on something you knew you had to forget.

Love.

-

"Tooru, who is she?" His mom asks softly, not wanting to let the curiosity lace her tone knowing the smile on his sons face was an exact look he had when he had you.

"This is Himari." He glances to her, wrapping an arm around her shoulder, with his lips tugged into a smile, a genuine one that's been kept a secret for too long.

"My dear little helper." Oikawa jokes as Himari rolls her eyes as his parents grew more in confusion at the sight of this stranger.

"Help with what Tooru?"

"To get Y/N to live with me in Argentina."

#haikyu x reader #oikawa x you #oikawa angst #iwaizumi x y/n #hajime iwaizumi #oikawa tooru #haikyuu iwaizumi #haikyuu!! #hq oikawa #hq iwaizumi #iwaizumi x reader #iwaizumi x you #oikawa toru x reader #oikawa torū

[myfearless-love]

The Wildest Place You Run (1/?) - Better Safe Than Sorry

It's finally here! My contribution to this year's CSSNS! This is my first time participating in this event and I couldn't be more excited to share my story with you! Recently I watched a lot of supernatural/fantasy TV shows on Netflix and so the concept of this fic was born. It has all kinds of creatures, mixed with adventure, drama, mystery, suspense, and of course, most importantly CAPTAIN SWAN.

Huge thank you to my beta and artist, @thejollyroger-writer for clearing up my mistakes and help me get this story to you. Check out what gorgeous art she made for the fic!! ☝️

I hope you all enjoy it as much as I enjoyed writing it!

Summary: Vampires, Werewolves, Mages, and Elves. For centuries, they kept their existence a secret, but the constant rebellions against the strict laws of the Guild had led to a terrible tragedy. In an open clash, it became apparent to humans just what kind of monsters lived among them. Emma Swan loses the love of her life in the first battle of the war. A few months later, while still trying to process what happened, a mysterious and terrifying figure worms his way into her life. But the man is hiding far more terrible secrets than he reveals to her, pulling them both into a horrible situation...

Chapters: 1/? - Better Safe Than Sorry

Fandom: Once Upon a Time

Rating: M

Relationships: Killian Jones/Emma Swan

Read on: FF.net or AO3

Words: ~1.7k

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The cobbled streets of the city were dripping with rainwater, and the light from the tall lamps hung like balloons in the cool, misty night air. The harsh wind tore at the branches of the balding trees, a vast amount of withered yellow and brown leaves stirred up a path on the uninhabited sidewalk.

The weather had cooled down more than she’d expected. She pulled up the zipper of her red leather jacket and quickened her steps. She knew it would have been wise to get home on time, she was sure David was already working up an ulcer, marching up and down in the living room.

Somewhere nearby, the clock tower struck ten and she shuddered, accelerating her pace as the curfew had just taken effect. Her hand instinctively slid onto her bag where her Glock 19 lay safely.

She dug into the satchel, and the startled hammering of her heart subsided somewhat as her fingers touched the barrel of the gun. She very much hoped she wouldn’t have to use it. In this world, bandits and robbers were the least dangerous kind, as it was enough to just simply shoot them…

When she finally emerged from the cover of the trees in the park, she opened the heavy wrought-iron gate and hastily crossed the narrow street to continue on the main road. Her footsteps echoed emptily on the deserted avenue, not a soul in sight.

Her destination wasn’t far off, and she fought the urge to run the last few yards. She turned around the corner and into a narrow alley, rushing toward the last, albeit slightly shabby, apartment building.

At the front door, her nearly frozen fingers rummaged awkwardly for her keys in her pocket. But before she could slide the key in, she heard the click of the lock, the massive iron door slamming open with a bang.

As she had suspected, she found herself face to face with a seething David, who, for the moment, was still silent. She risked an angelic and rueful smile and quickly slipped into the house beside him.

All her hopes were dashed when the door crashed back into its frame behind her and David turned to her vigorously. He put both his hands on his hips, a move she found rather comical despite the situation - it reminded her of an agitated lunch lady before scolding a kid in the cafeteria. Still, she couldn’t laugh at it. At the sight of his flashing eyes, she squared her shoulders and waited.

Come what might.

“Where the fuck have you been?”

Her only brother never cursed unless he was furious.

“I was just taking a walk in the park,” she replied quietly, and by that time, all her humor was gone. David was right. What she had done was really stupid. “I’m sorry. I should’ve kept better track of time.”

“Didn’t you even notice it got dark in the meantime?” David grew angrier by the minute, and her face began to burn with shame.

She hated arguing with him, so when the opportunity arose, she tried to heed his advice. Today’s case was an exception. “I’m really sorry,” she muttered, lowering her gaze to the pave-stone.

After long seconds of no response from him, she looked up cautiously, only to see him disappear behind the door that led to their apartment.

“David!”

She took off her boots and rushed after him, but as soon as she caught up with him, she grimaced. In the living room, on a mahogany-carved coffee table, David’s nearly complete arsenal of weapons lay spread out. Pistols, knives, rifles, magazines…

“What happened?” She dropped her bag on the couch and walked over to her brother, who was lounging in front of the window.

“A pack of werewolves in the middle of town in broad daylight! That’s what happened!” he hissed between clenched teeth, he was still trembling with fury.

“In the city center?” she repeated, stunned. That was a new one. Plus, it was happening during the day? It was getting weirder and weirder.

David took a deep breath, but it didn’t help much. He was still too upset.

“What happened? Are you hurt?”

“I’m fine. Although, it wasn’t up to me. If Killian hadn’t intervened, I would've certainly kicked the bucket," he shrugged as if it was incidental.

"Jesus…" She reached for David's shoulder, but he pulled away.

"At least fifteen people died. We weren't fast enough."

"Stop it," she admonished him. She grabbed im vigorously by the shoulder, turned him to face her, and urged him to look her in the eye. "And tell me, how many people did you save? A hundred? Two hundred?"

He expelled an angry breath. His tousled, sandy blond hair almost resembled a crow's nest, and his five o'clock shadow made his handsome face look unkempt. His light blue eyes stared at her with mixed despair. Meanwhile, he involuntarily stroked the small scar on his jaw.

"David, for God's sake, you’re a Hunter. I understand it's a shitty feeling, but you can't mourn every single person you can't save."

"I know," he whispered hoarsely, finally raising his head, then he shook it slightly, staring up at the ceiling dotted with tiny cracks. Emma could see his Adam's apple bob as he swallowed hard. "I'm sorry I yelled at you. I was just afraid something had happened to you. I was about to call Killian and the others to search for you."

"I understand and I'm really sorry. I’ll be in my room if we’re done here."

"Alright. I'm going to pack up my things then," he signaled with his head towards the pile of weapons adorning the table.

Emma nodded and picked up her bag, marching across the living room, and heading straight for her room. But before she could peel off her coat, someone outside their apartment started frantically knocking on the door.

"I'm coming!" David's voice was calm, but Emma could still see him securing his favorite rifle as he strode toward the entrance.

"David, open up! It's us!"

When she recognized Robin’s voice, her lips twisted into a relieved smile and she hurried to the front door as well.

"Hey, mate. Are you happy to see us?" Robin laughed at the troubled expression on David's face and the gun in his hands.

"Very funny." David pursed his lips, then stepped aside to let their friends in.

After Robin, Mary Margaret entered, followed by Ruby and Killian.

"We heard Emma had wandered away, so we thought we should sniff around town and look who we found!" Laughing, Ruby flicked playfully at Mary Margaret's back who grimaced as she walked away from the long-haired brunette.

Ruby wasn't exactly your average type of girl. She wore her waist-long chocolate brown hair in wild curls mixed with pink streaks. She invariably wore her favorite black leather garments: military boots, pants, and her signature black studded leather jacket. She looked like a rock star of the nineties.

"I need to make a call,” Mary Margaret said, nodding toward the kitchen, fishing her phone out of her pocket.

"Of course,” David nodded, kissed her on the cheek, and quietly closed the door once everyone was inside.

Robin, Ruby, Killian, and David took a seat in the living room while Emma joined Mary Margaret in the kitchen. Her friend walked over to the counter, unlocked her phone, but her fingers were trembling so badly that she was unable to dial.

“What’s wrong?” Emma anxiously stepped next to the brunette, who just shook her head violently, but her chalk-white face suggested the opposite.

“Didn’t David tell you?” she lifted her troubled hazel eyes to Emma. Her rain-soaked pixie-cut dark hair clung to her forehead, a stark contrast against her alabaster skin.

“What was he supposed to tell me?” she asked carefully.

“Leo was in that run-in with the wolves this afternoon, too. I just found out from Robin that he had to be taken to the hospital right after,” her voice trailed off and Emma could see her shaking.

“He’s probably fine,” she said firmly, trying to give her friend the hope she so often received from her.

“Yeah,” Mary Margaret nodded profusely, then feeling ready, she grabbed the phone and made the call.

While Mary Margaret talked to the hospital receptionist, Emma walked over to the refrigerator and returned to the counter with an unopened orange juice in her hand. She snagged two glasses from the kitchen cabinet and filled them both almost to the brim while tactfully not eavesdropping on Mary Margaret’s conversation because judging by the few words she could pick up, she was already talking to her cousin.

And it was rude to listen in.

“So, how’s our little lion?” Robin entered the kitchen with a grin and plopped casually down on the chair at the dining table.

“Fine,” Mary Margaret replied, not even reacting to Robin’s mocking tone.

It remained an eternal mystery to Emma why they disliked each other so much, but as long as they behaved in a relatively civil manner when they were in the same room together, she didn’t particularly care.

“Anyway, we need to get going soon. Someone saw some of Vampires near the nightclub. So far, they haven’t done anything that would violate the Guild’s rules, but better safe than sorry. They ordered us to look around.”

“And what about the curfew?” Emma raised an eyebrow.

“Humans are stupid. They don’t take Mages seriously. A lot of people aren’t willing to accept the existence of Werewolves and Vampires, even after what happened…”

Robin fell silent at Emma’s expression. He coughed sheepishly, then ran his fingers through his rich brown hair. “I didn’t mean to… I apologize,” he muttered and walked out of the kitchen with his head down.

“Emma…” she felt Mary Margaret’s hand on her shoulder. “Neal wouldn’t want to see you like this. You have to let him go…”

“I know… But… he shouldn’t have been the one to die…”

#cssns21 #cssns 2021 #captain swan supernatural summer #cs ff #cs fic #emma swan #killian jones #emma #emma 2020 #TWPYR #cs au #captain swan #captain swan ff #captain swan fic #my fic

[newtsies]

When I Was Your Man || A Ralbert One Shot

a/n - hello! so basically this one shot is a College Newsies AU where Racetrack and Albert broke up and Race started dating Spot :'). it's about ralbert though?? so it's like- okay its from alberts POV and it's based on When I Was Your Man so yeah :D (all lyrics from the song will be in bold and italicized),, i'll only be writing the chorus once <3

also i didnt edit this cuz its late and IM TIRED SO sorry if it sucks lol

tw('s) - cussing

same bed but it feels just a little bit bigger now

Albert didn't sleep well at night, if he even slept at all. His bed was empty. The same bed that he had slept in since the beginning of college. But it wasn't his bed, it was their bed. At least, it used to be theirs. Now, it was just his, but he couldn't accept that it was only his.

But at one point, it was theirs. Him and Racetrack, it was once their bed. Even if it was only his, Albert could swear that Race's body was still outlined in the cushion of his bed.

The bed used to be so small, too small for the two of them. They cuddled together to keep each other from falling off. But now it was huge. He had no-one to roll over to in the morning, he was alone.

He couldn't even sleep on the right side of the bed. That was Race's side. Even if Race hadn't slept on the bed for a long time, even if he would never sleep on the bed again. That was his side, not Alberts.

And often times he would lay awake in bed, staring at the ceiling. He would reach over to the right for his boyfriends- ex-boyfriends hand. But it wasn't there. He reached over and was met with sheets and pillows.

So he didn't sleep, because he had no-one to sleep with and his bed was too big to sleep in. And he stayed awake until the next morning when he got into his car and drove from his apartment to the school.

Not even in his car did he get peace. It wasn't his car, it was Race's car. Race had picked it out, he liked the color. And it smelled like Race's cologne and it held memories of Race in each dent of the leather seats.

So he sold the car. He got a new car, his own car. But even with the smell of Race gone, with his memories in the seats gone. The radio in the new car betrayed Albert.

our song on the radio but it don't sound the same

The car radio had one station, and Albert could swear that the station only had one playlist they played each day. Because every day, and it never missed one day, it would play their song. The song they first danced to. So Albert turned off the radio, and he never turned it on. Even when friends begged him to play music, the radio staid off and he played music from his quiet phone.

Every day, Albert showed up to school exhausted. He nearly passed out in class. Lunch was the only time he ever slept. Everyone assumed he didn't get sleep due to his hard classes, which couldn't be farther from the truth. He didn't do his work. He couldn't pay attention in class, not with Race there.

when our friends talk about you, all it does is just tear me down

"You really lucked out being with him, Al," Jack said.

Romeo agreed and added onto the comment, "Kelly's right. He's gorgeous. And a genius too. Too smart for his own good."

Albert raised his head from his arms with a desperately sad look. He sighed and shook his head, "I told you guys. I know we broke up a while ago, but it still hurts, okay?" He rested his head back into his arms and closed his eyes tightly. His heart ached with every comment. He knew Race was gorgeous. He knew Race was a genius. He knew so much about him, yet he didn't know him enough to keep him happy.

"Sorry, man. Forgot," Jack mumbled. Romeo muttered something of an apology and scratched at his neck.

"I know you hate school activities," Romeo started, "But you should come to the party tonight. Dance a little, I think it'll cheer you up."

Albert sighed and tried not to think about why dancing would be hard for him. He looked up and pushed his hair out of his face, "I'll come."

'cause my heart breaks a little when i hear your name

"Race!" Spot called from the couch. The music boomed and Spots voice was quiet, but Albert heard the name anyways. He immediately turned to the boy.

Spot grinned as Race made his way over to him. Race plopped into his lap and smiled back as he hugged the boy. Alberts eyes widened and his chest ached.

Even just hearing Race's name hurt Albert, brought back a wave of memories. Each yell of Race's name when he did something dumb, each fond laugh of the name when he complimented him, each whine of Racetrack's name when he bugged Albert too much. He missed it all.

it all just sounds like ooh, ooh, hoo

Jack and Romeo were definitely talking to Albert, but he couldn't hear anything they were saying. The music sounded like gibberish and he couldn't think. All he could do was stare at the couple on the couch and ache at the sight.

mm, too young, too dumb to realize, that i should have bought you flowers

Albert watched as Race giggled at the flower Spot offered him. Spot smiled and put the small yellow flower behind Race's ear. The stem stuck between his ear and his head whilst the bud pointed outwards.

The years that they dated, Albert and Race were young and naive. He didn't know how to be romantic or how to make Race happy. No matter how hard he tried.

"I should've bought him flowers," He sighed. Jack and Romeo shared a knowing glance before pushing Albert to sit down on the couch.

and held your hand

"I mean," Albert continued, "I was too insecure to do anything with him." They didn't even hold hands in public, because Albert was scared. Scared of what society would think.

should have gave you all my hours, when i had the chance

Albert and Race had started dating their first year of college. Albert was constantly busy with classes. He was always doing work and stressing about class.

Anytime Race would make an attempt to spend time with him, he shut it down.

"I'm doing work," He would say, "You should be doing work, too."

He wanted to do well, get a good job, find a good home, start a family. But all of that was dumb. It was pointless. To hell with it all if we didn't get to come back from his job to see Race. Because Race was his home and he didn't want to start a family with anyone else.

take you to every party 'cause all you wanted to do was dance

"Al!" Race would whine and grab at his arm, "Dance with me, please. Just for a little bit."

Albert never did dance with him. No matter how much he asked, he refused to do so. He couldn't, he needed to get good grades. He needed to provide.

"We can dance later," He would say.

The usual response he would get was, "Promise?" But one day, he received a different answer, "There isn't going to be a later. Not for us, Albert."

now my baby's dancing, but he's dancing with another man

Race pulled Spot up from the couch. They smiled as they moved together to the middle of the room. The music vibrated around them as the two danced.

Albert watched from the camp as he shook his leg. He took in a deep and quaking breath before stumbling out of the house. He threw his cup to the side and gulped in a large breath.

my pride, my ego, my needs, and my selfish ways, caused a good strong man like you to walk out my life

"What do you mean their won't be a later for us, Racer?" Albert had asked, finally looking up from his studies.

Race had scoffed, "Oh, of course! That's what gets you to look me in the eye, huh?" He had rolled his eyes, "We're done, Al. I can't do this anymore, can't do us. Okay? You're so god damn selfish. You only do what's best for you. Ever think about what's best for us, huh? Do you ever even think about me?"

"Of course I think about you, Race. You're all I ever think about," Al had stuttered out.

"Sure," Race had laughed sourly, "I just wanted to fucking dance, Albert. You wouldn't even do that with me. I'm leaving." With that, Race had grabbed all of his stuff and walked out of the apartment.

now i never, never get to clean up the mess i made, oh. and that haunts me every time i close my eyes

Albert closed his eyes when he left the house. Their breakup flashed behind his eyelids and he choked out a sob. He fell to his knees on the grass.

"God damnit," He weakly hit the grass beneath him, "I could've fixed it. I could- Could've. But- Spot. I can't fix it anymore."

although it hurts, i'll be the first to say that i was wrong

He shook his head, "Race was right. I never thought about him." And his stomach twisted with that realization.

Albert has thought he was thinking about Race, about their future together. But it was never about Race, it was about him. He needed to good grades, Racer didn't. Everything that happened was his fault, and he knew that.

oh, i know i'm probably much too late, to try and apologize for my mistakes

He took a deep breath before falling back to sit down on the grass. The door opened and a boy with curly blonde hair sat down next to him.

Race gave Albert a sad smile.

"I'm not going to say sorry," Albert started, "Because that won't make up for anything. I was wrong, about everything." Race nodded.

"Al," Race said quietly.

Albert shook his head with a small grin, "Don't. Go get, Spot. Be happy. Go love the boy who you want to see when you get home from long work days, okay? Love him the way I love you." He paused, "Not the way I treated you, but the way I feel about you. I know it didn't seem like it. But I love you."

Race smiled and gave Albert a pat on the cheek, "I loved you too."

That was the sad tragedy of their relationship.

Albert was in love with Race. Race had been in love with Albert.

They loved each other at different times. But Albert could accept the pain of being in love with a boy would didn't love him back, because even though Race was in love with someone else, he was happy. And that's all Albert wanted, because Race deserved to be happy.

#:) #i actually don't think this is that sad tbh #but maybe thats cuz i wrote it IDK #like i think its bittersweet #idk if thats the right word #anyways #actual tags now #ralbert #racetrack higgins #race newsies #albert newsies #albert dasilva #race higgins #racetrack newsies #livesies #newsies #broadway #musicals #one shot #newsies oneshot #oneshot #mylo.types #mylo.headline #ralbert oneshot

[dumbasscorn]

Exothermic - chapter twelve

Amalthea vs The Game 

"Thea, my dear niece. Is Harry corrupting your young, innocent mind?"

previous chapter 

1,064 words 

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The dullness of school after Trevor stopped showing up was quite a shock to Amalthea. He no longer texted her every twenty minutes, disrupting her from tedious work and begging for attention.

Which had resulted in her phone being confiscated and held until the end of the day more than once, only to retrieve it once again to see a spam of messages. They all were along the lines of asking if she died, and if she did, to then come back alive because Trevor hadn't yet had the time to call a witch.

It was nearly two weeks since Amalthea last received a text from Trevor. Jackson fell into a bit of a slump, whining to the girl about not having his best friend to mock teachers with. That being said, Jackson King took it upon himself to uphold the responsibility of being the nuisance in Thea's life, stating that it is necessary until Trevvie (as he so happily nicknamed the missing boy) came back to fill his duty.

Amalthea was not happy with her predicament. Trevor Uley better be cured of his illness and get the hell back, or else she was going to snap a neck.

It was Friday afternoon and Jackson, as they pushed through seniors to get to the exit, was pestering Amalthea. The soccer player was moping on about how Trevor wouldn't be there to see him play -and that she should feel really, really bad for him cause it sucks a lot- as Thea focused in on the rock music playing from her right headphone.

"If I say I'll go, will you leave me the fuck alone?" She finally snapped, clenching her teeth together. Widening his gray eyes, Jackson jumped up and down, "Oh my god, yes! Can't believe you cracked-- only took two weeks." He pretended to wipe sweat off his forehead, sighing in relief. Amalthea ignored him, giving no indication that she was listening to a single word he spoke.

After arriving home -not without the silent, weird car ride, of course!- Amalthea tossed her body onto the comfortable cushions of the couch. Her eyes were closed in comfort when she heard chortles of laughter, disrupting the small moment of bliss. A manly voice, that she had grown accustomed to, called for attention.

"Rough day there, bud?" Charlie asked with humor laced in his voice.

"Oh, absolutely. Uley was a no show again-- it's getting a bit annoying having to deal with his child alone. Dumb-dumb annoyed his way into making me say I'd go to his game, which is going to be boring by the way, and Uley is gonna pay for this one. He owes me big time." Amalthea droned on, not noticing the other man sitting at the kitchen table listening to her vent.

"Woah. You, Amalthea Rue Swan, are going to an actual high school event? Unheard of. Revolutionary!" Charlie gasped, hand on his heart.

Thea waved an arm around her head. "I know! A tragedy. Mortifying. Gonna hate every second of it. Honestly wish I wasn't an awesome, amazing, beautiful, hilarious, enigmatic person. Maybe then people wouldn't beg me to do such mundane things, like watching dudes kick a damn ball around a field."

"Gross. Good luck though. Gonna need it with that attitude!" Charlie pointed at her, "How're you getting there? Someone gonna pick you up, or what? I'd take you, but Harry and I are going back to fish again. We're gonna have a fish fry soon and you need fish to do that." He smirked, finally bringing her attention to the man next to him.

Amalthea snapped her head up, eyes meeting those of Harry Clearwater's, whose eyes were riddled with mirth as he looked at the girl on the couch.

Finally realizing that her uncle was not the only person in the room, Thea smiled brightly at the man. "Charlie's fishing friend! How're you doing? Catch any fish without Charlie? Man probably wards them off with his corny ass jokes."

"Language!" Charlie called from the fridge, not bothering to defend his jokes.

Harry hid his laughter and winked at the teen, who still laid on the couch with her head now resting on the ledge. Wanting to gossip about her uncle, Amalthea maneuvered herself into a sitting position, perched on the edge of the seat. "So, what's Uncle Charlie like with friends? Are his jokes still dumb? Wait- does he curse a lot? Tell me, tell me, tell me." Thea egged him on, watching as he walked over and took a seat aside her.

The man whispered back, just as quietly. "Actually quite the sailor mouth, that one's got. I swear, I'm not lying!" He swore, once the girl began to look at him in disbelief.

Charlie walked in on the elder man and his teenage niece whispering to one another, laughter sounding from the both of them. After overhearing Harry tell the girl a story about how Charlie once drank a bit too much as they were watching a baseball game and fell face first into the mashed potatoes, the uncle felt the need to interrupt.

"Thea, my dear niece. Is Harry corrupting your young, innocent mind?" Charlie questioned, breaking the two apart by placing his hand on Thea's head and pushing her away.

Amalthea gasped, "Uncle Charlie! How dare you assume such dastardly things! We were just talking about what out favorite flavor of cake was! Tut-tut! Always assuming the worse, you are." The girl shook her head in shame, knocking Harry on the elbow so he did the same.

The man next to the girl nodded in agreement, adding a "I would never!" to back his argument.

After listening (and ignoring) Charlie's lecture about the animals in the woods and how to steer clear from them, Thea nudged her way out of the front door, walking back to the school she escaped from some hours ago. Asking Bella for a ride was definitely not an option. She just barely avoided that mess when she told Charlie that she did not want to bother her cousin.

'Uley owes me mega. There's no way in hell he gets to skip and stay home, and I have to freeze my ass off through a game!' Thea thought, tugging her sleeves further down.

Ignoring the rustling of leaves and trees, Amalthea trudged her way to the bleachers.

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if y'all see any mistakes seeing harry being called henry no you didn't

also i have a government essay to do and i’d rather die than do it 😍

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