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#he was the only man in their block who didn’t hit his wife or children
thehmn · 2 years
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Psychiatrist: Does anyone else in your family have ADHD? It often runs in the family.
Me: I don’t know. Nobody ever got diagnosed with it.
Psychiatrist: That’s not unusual. A sign could be criminal activity because people with ADHD seek excitement and have less impulse control if they’re undiagnosed, so petty, non-violent crime is common.
Me: Well, the only criminal was my grandfather who kept robbing corner stores with his hunting rifle and was so well known by the police they’d show up at my grandparents’ apartment first if a corner store nearby got robbed. My mom woke up more than once because a police officer was shining a flashlight in her face in the middle of the night when they were looking for him and the fancy jewlery box in her bedroom was made by my grandfather while he was in prison.
Psychiatrist looking at me silently, then crossing a single thing off on her papers: I…see.
Me: Oh, and my dad bounced his legs a lot when he sat down.
Psychiatrist: Yes…that could be a sign too…
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Kiss In Stitches
Summary; Javier Peña x Fe!Reader/OC (Agent Jackson) -> Turns out, Javi is scared of hospitals so you distract him in the only way you can think of at the time, but it comes back to haunt you.
Disclaimer: Doesn't really follow Narcos, techincally. Fluff, angst, not proof read. Mentions of death in hospitals etc.
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You had met Agent Peña during a field opp. It had been you - working for Interpol - and Murphy until Peña finally arrived back to the DEA and you all made your way into the apartment block. 
With the drug trade growing, Interpol got more and more concerned. That was when they sent you. You were one of the best agents to graduate from your academy year. No-one had marksman ship like you. They also didn’t know as many languages as you, either. 
Both of your parents were diplomats. Your mother had the higher authority so you spent more time at home with your dad - who had taught you to speak Italian, Spanish, Russian and French. 
It had been a rocky start; Peña not being told you existed was the main thing. 
“Who’s she?”
“She has a name.” You voiced before Murphy could introduce you both. 
“Javi, meet Agent Jackson. Interpol.”
“Interpol?” Peña questioned before looking to you. “I wasn’t aware-”
“Clearly. Shall we?”
By the time you both got back to the Embassy, you and Peña had gotten onto better terms. Mostly because he’d saved your life. As one sacario shot at you and you shot back, one appeared behind you. If Peña hadn’t gotten there first, you’d probably (definitely) be dead. 
It had been a quick turn around and before you knew it, you found yourself permenatly partnered with Peña and Murphy. You became a good trio. It was also nice to learn that Steve had a wife. Connie. 
You both got on like a house on fire. And, with your sister back in Europe helping at the hospitals, you had 24hr access to medical knowledge - especially when it came to children. 
Your sister had trained, originally, as a general surgeon before she decided to retrain almost 10 years ago to be a midwife and help mothers and their children. Most of your medical knowledge came from your sister because, during the time of her exams, she didn’t have anyone else to help her revise and study. So, you became a sound board. 
It just helped that you listened. 
This was how you knew, during a raid, that Peña needed stitches. Several to be exact. 
“What?” 
He seemed a little panicked as you helped him stand and both looked down to the scar in his leg. 
“Murphy!” You yelled, and two seconds later, the blond came round the corner. 
“Yeah? Oh.”
“Medic’s are still 20 minutes out. I can get him to the hospital in 10. Mind holding down the fort, here?”
Murphy nodded. “Sure.”
“I don’t need a hospital.”
You scoffed and titled your head for a second as if to say Come on, Peña. “We both know that isn’t true.”
Grabbing him by the upper arm, you secured your gun away before dragging Peña out of the building, down the stairs and towards your car. 
“Honestly, I’m fine. I can wait for the medics-”
“Shut up.”
By the time you arrived to the hospital and basically had to drag Peña all the way inside to the point where he wouldn’t even sit down on the bed once they found him a room, so you had to place both your hands on his shoulders, walk him backwards til his legs hit the bed and sit him down. 
“They’ll fix you up in no time.”
“I didn’t-”
“If you say you didn’t need to come, I will personally shoot you myself.” You warned. 
It was over the next 10 minutes that you saw Peña’s emotions. 
You had sat down on one of the chairs and for at least 8 of those minutes, Peña had been picking his finger nails, bouncing his leg, flattening his ‘tash over and over, running a hand at the back of his neck and through his hair. 
“Penn-ya?” You sounded out, getting his attention.
This was a man who was on the hunt for Escobar. A man who you had been shoot down plenty of sacarios, risk his life every single day doing a job that he loves and yet…
He’s scared of, what? A hospital?
“Are you-”
But you didn’t get to ask, “Are you nervous?” because a moment later, the door opened up and in walked the doctor ready to complete his stitches. 
You watched as Peña tried to remain calm throughout it all. Every now and again, he’d swear under his breath. Even though they’d given him some pain-killers, he wanted back on the job. 
More so, he wanted out of the hospital. 
But as it was getting down to the final few sitiches, the pain seemed to be getting worse. 
And so was Peña. 
His nerves were sky rocketing because he didn’t want to look at his wound being sown up right before his eyes, but he also didn’t want to see around the hospital. 
So standing by his side, you got him to focus on you rather than the pain and the white-washed, bleach smelling walls. 
And that was when you did what even you least expected. 
You kissed him. 
It was…a surprise to say the least. The doctor paid no attention, finishing up Peña’s stitches whilst his body was completely still. The kiss, although lasted, still felt (oddly) too short. 
hankfully, by the time you pulled away, the doctor had finished and was writing Peña a perscription for some pain killers. 
“These should disolve, but if there are any signs of infection, come straight back.”
Peña, after a moment (having to tear his eyes from yours), nodded and stood up. 
“It will be sore for a few days, so I say rest. I understand your job isn’t exactly the most ideal, but try where you can.”
“Thanks, Doc.”
Peña signed himself out and it was awkward silence all the way to the car. But he broke it. 
“Thanks, by the way. For the…kiss. I was nervous, that was why you did it, right?” God, he’d never been this awkward around a woman. It was like he was going bright red from just the word kiss. What was he? A teenager? 
“It was the only way I could think about taking your mind off it.” You answered as you walked around to the driver’s seat. “Why…why do you not like hospitals? You attend med school and, what? Faint in the reception?”
In all honesty, you did want to know. But now it was also to deflect from the kiss.
Peña gave a small laugh as he lifted himself into the car and shut the door. “I don’t know…I’ve just never…They’re never a good place. They help people, but anyone I’ve met who’s gone in…9 times out of 10, they didn’t come back out.”
“So? What? You’ve never been in one since?”
Peña smirked. “Welll, if i got kissed every time I went, I’d be sure to turn up more often.”
Your smile back turned into a laugh that both of you shared. So, good, you both thought it was something to laugh about.
But…one question remained. 
Why didn’t it feel like that? And why did you (both) want to to happen again?
Okay, maybe two questions. 
The weeks that followed, everything seemed to go back to normal. Or, at least, what you both thought was normal. 
But, no. 
Murphy knew different. Everyone did. 
When asked by Connie, Steve couldn’t exactly pin-point it. It was just…something. Like, the way you’d look at Peña when he wasn’t looking, or the way he’d look at you when you weren’t. Or it was in the way, when left alone in a room together, Murphy could walk back in and he could cut through the tention. 
But it wasn’t hatred. 
Neither of you yelled at the other. Neither of you looked like you were ready to shoot the other given the chance. 
It was just, plain awkwardness. 
“Maybe the like each other?” Connie suggested. “I mean, if I didn’t know them, part of me would think maybe.”
“But…it’s Peña and Jackson. They work well together, but…romantically. I- I just can’t see it, Connie.”
“Well, have you thought about asking one of them. Maybe they might tell you. Ask Peña. If anyone is going to cough it up, it’ll be him.”
Connie was right. 
Peña was a good cop and, every now and then, he could get away with a lie. But you were something else entirally. 
In all honesty, no-one really knew much about you other than the information you had given up - even then it wasn’t out right. They’d have to pay close attention. 
Or read what they could of your file. 
They knew nothing of your childhood other than you moved around a lot, you had one sister (but you could have more siblings for all they knew), you trained in the academy when you were 20 having early admission since you graduated University early. But that was about it. 
They knew nothing other than what could be infered from a file. 
And they’d asked a couple of questions over the last few months - like your coffee order. But you wouldn’t even tell them that. You’d just stand and go and get the coffee’s yourself and since it was in a to-go cup - like the rest of their’s - they didn’t know what you drank. Creame? Sugar?...salt? Who knows. 
You also would disappear at least twice a week at lunch. At one point, they had decided to follow you but they’d lost you after twenty seconds. You were quick and light on your feet. 
This was why you were the best in your class. 
They had offered you the opportunity to work for the Secret Service at one point but you had turned the job down. Plus, with Interpol, you got to travel. 
Even if they weren’t the happiest of ‘holiday’s’. 
But all of this changed when Murphy out right asked Peña one day, what was going on between him and yourself. 
Of course, he denied everything. Nothing was wrong. Everything was normal. 
So, Steve brought in Connie. 
Within ten minutes, Connie had it out of Peña about what happened. 
“So, she kissed you…then what?”
“We left the hospital and…that was it.”
“And you haven’t talk about it.” Connie could already tell. 
“I guess. We joked about it but then we went back to work.”
“And how has it been since?”
Connie leaned back in his husband’s desk chair. 
“Normal.”
“You keep saying that Javi, but you keep watching the door waiting for her to come around the corner. Have you thought about telling her how you feel?”
Javi laughed. “What do you mean?”
“I mean, have you told her that you like her.”
“I don’t like her.” Javi denied. 
It was now Connie’s turn to laugh. “Javi, please. I know a love-sick man when I see him.”
“I like her just fine, it’s just…”
“What?Javi, you can say you’re scared. Look,” Connie stood up and flattened the collar of his shirt. “Just talk to her. You might find she feels the same way. Why else would she have kissed you? She could have slapped you instead, but she didn’t. Just think about it.”
After that, he did. 
And it wouldn’t leave his head. 
He’d be lying if he said he didn’t want to do it again. Because he did. So much. But you were- are a co-worker. There had to be rules around a cop dating a cop. Especially in the DEA. 
Nevertheless, it still played on his mind. Day in, day out. If he even looked in your general direction, he was always fearful if you could hear what he was thinking. 
Yet, it wasn’t until two weeks later, in the file room, did he try and talk about it. 
You had gone in there and shut the door behind you. No-one really came in the room hours after lunch so you had the small cupboard all to yourself, until Javi entered. 
“Hey,” he looked flustered. 
Nervous. 
“Can we talk?”
“About what?” you asked, looking back to the file. But that was short lived as he walked over and placed a hand to push to file down from your face. He needed you to look at him. 
“We need to talk about it. The kiss. Why did you kiss me?”
“Jav- Peña. Look, I’m sorry it happened okay-”
“I’m not.”
“But you were shaking like a leaf and- what?”
“I’m not.” Peña repeated. “I’m not sorry it happened. I-I don’t know what else to say. I’m just…I’m not sorry it happened and I’d by lying if I said I didn’t enjoy it and-”
“Javi, please. We…we can’t do this.” It felt like the walls were closing in on you. You could smell his colounge and it was intoxicating. 
“Please, hermosa.” The nickname rolled off his tough effortlessly. Like the name had always belonged to you. “Why did you…do you want it to happen again?”
His voice is soft and you can hear youself screaming, yes! but…something stops you. 
Nerves. 
“I…I can’t.”
With that, you left. All you wanted to do was run out of the building but the moment you left, Murphy slammed down his phone. 
“Where’s Peña?” 
Then he appeared by your side. “Grab your vests.”
A building of sacarios. Three of which were Escobar’s right-hand men. His most trusted. 
Get one…get them all. 
The sky above was growing darker by the hour and, although the temperature had dropped, it was still warm outside. 
And Peña had been watching your every move. 
He knew you…to an extent. He knew you well enough to know that you would say “no,” if you didn’t want it to happen. He knew, or maybe he hoped, there was still a part of you, no matter how small, wanted exactly what he wanted. 
For it to happen again. 
“Jackson!”
He approached the back of your car as you strapped on your vest. You tried to run, but you didn’t get very far. 
“Please, can we just talk-”
“No, Javi. I…I can’t do this right now.”
Peña stopped in his tracks, watching you walk down the hill. In truth, you were maybe 6ft in front of him. 
“Why did you kiss me?”
You slowed to a stop. 
“You could have slapped me, punched me, shot me in the leg for all I cared. But you kissed me. Why?”
He slowly walked closer to you and before you knew it, you had turned to face him. 
“Why, hermosa? Why?”
“I don’t know, okay! I don’t know. It was the only thing I could think of at the time.”
“And about what I asked you before?”
“I can’t…Javi. I…”
“Who says?”
It took you a moment. “I do. I…I can’t do this with you, Javi.”
“Why?”
He probably sounded desperate, and he was. He needed to know why before he walked away. 
“I just…”
When you didn’t say anything else, Javi held your head in his hand, cupping your cheeks before pulling you closer. The grip was lose enough for you to push him away if you wanted to but when you began to kiss back and pulled yourself closer, his grip became more secure. 
When he went to break the kiss, a small noise escaped your lips to which he chuckled and kissed you again. 
It was…intoxicating. Addictive. 
“Tell me you feel the same.”
“And that didn’t prove it?” You breathed. 
Javi chuckled, holding your head against his. His hand lay at the back of your neck, holding you in place. “I need words, hermosa.”
You smiled. “I feel the same.”
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six-eyed-samurai · 1 month
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Sorry this is so trash y'all, I was getting stressed out and had no idea where it was going. If you don't like OC children I suggest you don't read. Obanai is the character I'm labelled the most, so I still had a lot of fun with this though! If you zoom in real close you'll find my beautiful gf Megumi guest starring as Mitsuri too~~~
“If we ever get reborn, if we're born again as human beings, will you make me your wife?”
*** Some things never changed, no matter the time, distance…number of reincarnations.
The famously red and yellow shock of hair inherited by all the descendants of the Rengoku family, for one. The scarred faces and hot tempers of the Shinazugawas, for another. The whiny cowardice and obsession with girls in the Agatsuma boys.
And the beautiful but tragic love story that was the romance between the former sour Serpent Pillar and sweet Love Pillar.
***
Sometimes when Mitsuri met up with Shinobu they’d talk about if, hypothetically, one day the Corps were no longer needed and demons no longer existed, what would they like to do?
“I’d really like it if Iguro-san and I got together! He’s so sweet to me, he even gave me these socks! He’s kind of cute too.”
“Would you really like to get married to someone as bitter as him?” Shinobu hid her trademark smile behind her teacup.
“Of course! If - if he’d have me. I’ve always wanted to have a big family with a lot of kids. Three or four? I’m not too sure, but we’d have so much fun together! I’d love to braid my girl’s hair or - ooh, or talk to them about boys, and if I did have any sons I’d love to cook for them! Oooh, do you think we could play sports together? I’m sure I could keep up.”
“...you’d do more than keep up, Mitsuri-chan.”
Parallel in eerily similar ways Obanai too would pour out the same musings to his best friend in the Corps over complaining about Tomioka’s face or simply just training together. The only differences, perhaps, was that Sanemi was getting fed up that Obanai was not making a move and the Serpent Pillar wasn’t so sure he’d make a good father…or that he even wanted children.
“When are you going to stop dreaming and complaining about whatever sunshiney marriage dream you’re having with Kanroji to me and actually tell her? Fxxking coward.” Sanemi deftly swung his sword with a lot more force than necessary, fed up with hearing Obanai make excuse after excuse as to why he hadn’t done anything yet. “Man up, grow some balls and go confess. You both are so obviously lovesick I want to throw up.”
“...soon.” Obanai blocked his hit. “But if you throw up, go do it somewhere else.”
Soon, soon, soon, the both of them repeatedly answered each time. Were they to know their tragic fate, their ‘soon’ never to come? They did plan to confess eventually, some day, one day.
Just never planned on regretting only having to do it while awaiting at death’s door, one to never see his love even in their dying moments, the other unable to hold him and really tell him exactly how much he meant to her - but the universe wasn’t that cruel.
***
Obanai Iguro, a man renowned for his godly level cooking and sharp tongue capable of rendering even the most rude of customers into tears. Obanai Iguro, a man known to his family as someone who rarely showed affection but could be counted on to always be there for them. Obanai Iguro, a man only known to cry once in his life when his beloved wife gave birth to their first born twin girls and pass out from worry when Mitsuri went into labor early with their happy accident baby Fuyu.
Obanai Iguro, who still wasn’t sure what he had done to earn such an amazing family for he wasn’t the best of saints, but thanked his lucky stars every day to wake up to - 
“DAD! Can we go, please, please, pretty please?” 
“MOM, STOP, I DON’T WANT A HAIRCUT -”
“Mama! Mama!”
“Where’s my chocolate bar? Fuyu! Nii-chan!”
“DADDY, I’M HEADING OUT!”
-the utter chaos that was their big family of seven on the weekends, the only two days when their famous diner didn’t open.
“WHAT?” Obanai rarely raised his voice - his acidic, disappointed tone was always enough to scold his five children - but for once surprise had taken him by…well, surprise. With a stack of cereal bowls in one hand and their youngest in the other he dashed out faster than a demon of the kitchen and loomed (as well as he could with his lack of height anyway) menacingly at the newcomer standing at the threshold of their cluttered living room. “Baby, you never said you’d be going out today…at least not with this scumbag.”
“Daddy, please, can you not be so weird about it?” Oh, he should’ve known something was up the moment his second oldest and precious princess Junko had come home three days ago giggling like a maniac on her phone. Jeez, why couldn’t she stay a cute little four year old forever? Now all these teenage boys were coming over to taint his golden girl.
Out of the five, Junko was the one that resembled Mitsuri the most, even in looks with her magenta hair that her mother fawned over putting in double pigtail braids and bright green eyes always turned up in half-moons from her smiling. Adorable from the moment she was born. Cheerful no matter what. The most loving and clingy to both her parents. Truly a daddy’s girl; and there was no way Obanai was letting her go off with some ‘just a friend who also happens to be the opposite gender’. 
But it did make a lot of sense guys would chase after her just like they did with Mitsuri…still, what if she got her innocent little heart broken? What if she got dumped halfway? What if that bright sunshine she had eternally been faded after the certain failure this so-called hangout would be?
 He glared daggers irritably at the poor boy in question, and even looking as frazzled as he did from cooking seven breakfasts in a row he managed to make the receiver squirm a little. Okay, a lot. 
But to the boy’s credit he still managed to muster an awkward, shy smile and held out a hand. “Hi, Mr. Iguro! I’m Kaito - if it’s alright with you can Junko come to the park with me? If I’m interrupting your family time I’ll come back another day!” 
Hmph. He seemed nice enough but the bead of sweat dripping down his forehead was obvious to everyone. Clearly not a very brave one. What would he do if they got cornered by those neighborhood bullies the Iguro’s third born was always going head to toe with? Run, probably, no doubt. With spiky, tousled hair and rumpled clothes like that he probably wasn’t too bothered about his appearance. Lack of hygiene: red flag right there, Obanai was sure.
Junko edged closer to her father, playing with the edge of her skirt (oh, so he was why she had been taking so long to dress this morning) nervously. “Daddy, come on, you don’t have to be so threatening. Kaito’s…nice.” 
She colored up pretty fast and Obanai narrowed his eyes. “Absolutely not. You’re not going to go gallivanting the countryside with this…whatever he is.”
Kaito cleared his throat. “I live a few buildings down if that helps?”
Maybe Mitsuri might’ve let Junko go off with a lot of squealing about how cute they were and encouraging this “young love”, but Obanai would rather lose his arms and sight and life then agree to it. “No. Not with a boy, not ever.”
“Dad, come on, please?” 
Oh god, not the puppy eyes. Obanai stared up for a beat wondering what deity had blessed his daughters with such enormous doe eyes he could never say no to and how could he track him down before averting eye contact and muttering “fine”.
“ThankyousomuchIloveyoualotDadthankyousomuch!” Ah well, maybe it couldn’t hurt once in a while to let his little dove leave the nest if he got to see her beam so brightly all the spotlights in the world faded to gray and hug him so tightly.
“Be back by evening or I’ll have his head and put it on a spike outside the restaurant!” He made a “I’m-watching-you-so-you-better-not-do-anything-to-my-baby” gesture at this Kaito when they left. Why did she have to grow up so fast?
“Is he serious?” Obanai heard Kaito asking as they ran off.
“...I mean, he did tie up someone and left them outside for a day because they gave Kyoka a flower on White Day, but don’t worry! Daddy’s really nice!”
“You better not do the same,” Obanai grumbled down at the toddler clinging to him, fast asleep and drooling as he headed back to the kitchen. “You’re going to be the only girl left in this house who hasn’t gone into their teenager phase, Fuyu.”
Fuyu sighed softly and clung on even more, as if she understood what he was saying. Her tiny, puffy pink ponytail tickled his neck, as did the nagging suspicion that today’s adventures and problems hadn’t come to an end yet.
“DAD! COME UP, COME UP! MOM’S FIGHTING WITH KYOKA!”
“Dad, can you come up?”
“OBANAI, PLEASE GET UP HERE NOW!”
Aaand another problem arose to deal with. Who was he to deny any of Mitsuri’s, his queen, requests, so up he went as fast as he could after dumping the dishes in the sink to be washed another time.
***
Mitsuri loved her children a lot, and that was obvious to even an outsider. She had never punished them once, always stopped to give them attention individually,  constantly showered them in sugary confections, agreed to even the most ridiculous of games, played good cop every time they got into trouble and never, ever, raised a hand or used her crazily unnatural strength against them.
Until her eldest daughter Kyoka hit her fourteenth birthday apparently - as much as it pained her to do it she was pinning her down to the chair with all her strength to prevent her daughter’s desperate attempts to escape while Torao watched with wide eyes and Kenji excitedly explained the whole thing to Obanai. 
Why oh why couldn’t she be as easy going as her twin Junko or as compliant as Torao or as agreeable as Kenji? Heck, even Fuyu was a little less rebellious than Kyoka when she was in her moods. 
Not that Mitsuri was saying she wanted to change her daughter’s personality, oh no, never. She’d give up all the sakura mochi in the world before that happened. Kyoka was the most responsible girl anyone could ask for and had won so many awards at school the wall was running out of space for framed certificates. But honestly she could be rather…stubborn at times. 
Strangers and customers often commented on the amazing genetic spread between all of her five children, a perfect mix of her and darling Obanai: Kyoka had received her dad’s black hair and blue eyes with her mother’s beauty marks and strength of ten men; her fraternal twin Junko had inherited her pink and green scheme but Obanai’s petite frame; the boys Kenji and Torao had black hair mixed with pink beginnings and fading green ends respectively; Fuyu her mother’s candy floss hair and dad’s captivating golden yellow eyes. Mitsuri delightedly reveled in cutting, combing and styling them ever since they were young…
“Mom, please, for the last time, MY BANGS ARE FINE!”
“Kyoka, they’re too long and it’s slanted, I told you you shouldn’t have cut them yourself -”
“You weren’t free at the time, besides, this is the current trend anyways -”
But how could she have known it was going to be absolute hell now to give Kyoka’s short, unevenly sliced hair a trim?
“I don’t see what’s trendy if it’s getting in your eyes!”
“She’s been rubbing them a lot lately,” Torao piped up, but cringed when Kyoka shot him her signature death stare and hid behind Obanai. 
“Just let me cut them, Kyoka,” Mitsuri repeated, exasperated for the first time in history. Even Fuyu seemed to tense in her sleep. “Why are you being so insistent about having them in your eyes like that?”
“...Ryota said they looked cool.”
Once again the stark contrast between Mitsuri and Obanai’s personalities revealed itself as it did daily when faced with the realization their girls were at that age where boys had a lot of impact in their choices.
“KYAAAAAAH, WHY DIDN’T YOU SAY SO? I’M SO SORRY, I DIDN’T KNOW YOU WERE DOING THIS TO IMPRESS HIM!” 
At once Mitsuri exploded into sheer joy, glee and anticipation, grabbing her eldest into a crushing hug, crying that her little girl was all grown up and ready to go look for her soulmate; Kyoka awkwardly returned it with a red face. 
Obanai, on the other hand, looked like he was in the middle of a seizure, but that was a story for later. 
“WE SHOULD GO TO SHOPPING TOGETHER, IT’S BEEN TOO LONG SINCE WE BOUGHT YOU NEW DRESSES!” Mitsuri took a deep breath to calm herself, then launched into a barrage of rapid fire interrogation. “Have you made a first move? Is he showing any signs of being interested? What’s he like? Have you both gone on any dates yet?”
“Mom, please, it’s not that big of a deal! He just sits behind me!” Kyoka averted her eyes and shrank further into her untidy fringe. “...I don’t think Dad’s gonna like him much though.”
Mitsuri’s eyes gleamed. Ah, an opportunity for a little mother-daughter bonding time with a lil’ boy talk. Of course she’d wind up telling Obanai one day - she was almost as bad as the Kamado family at lying - but it’d be fun while it lasted. “Don’t worry, it’ll be our secret.” 
***
Mitsuri had been so enthusiastic about having a backyard when they had bought the house that Obanai had relented from his steadfast argument of not creating a garden even without flowers (bad enough he had to wear a face mask 24/7 to filter pollen) and they had come to the agreement that it would at least have be a mini playground for the kids - a lone, squeaking tire swing, abandoned bikes and littered toys today all ignored in favour of a - 
“DAD, DAD, DAD, CHECK THIS OUT! I FOUND A WORM!”
“Put it back!”
“Come on, I want to show Dad! I won’t hurt it!”
“Ew, don’t hold it to my face! Drop it back in the dirt!”
“Blep!”
“Nii-chan, don’t give it to Fuyu! She’ll eat it! NO, DON’T GIVE IT TO ME!”
Kyoka shrieked when Kenji deliberately dangled the worm in front of her, causing her to drop the phone she had been scrolling on with Fuyu on her lap. Torao took the opportunity to run away from his elder brother and hide behind Mitsuri standing at the doorway. Obanai wished he had a camera right then to capture the moment because her cheeks were red and puffed out from a terrible attempt to stop her giggling but unfortunately he was still fuming over losing his daughter to a…ugh, he couldn’t even say it. 
“Eh, Torao?! Don’t you wanna try holding it?! You’re always so freaked out over a little insect!!!”
Kenji had always reminded Mitsuri of someone on the edge of her brain but she couldn’t remember what - or who. As the years went on it began to push deeper and deeper, the way he unnecessarily shouted his words in excitement, his fire-bright personality and how he easily looked out for his younger brother like it was nothing. The feeling was usually accompanied by a wave of sadness (grief?), even more so the day he brought home a friend he introduced as Tojuro, but she couldn’t deny it was such a blessing to have him around. 
“I don’t want to! Just leave it be!”
Torao…on the other hand….where he got his shy, socially anxious genes from Obanai to this day was still wracking his brains over. Of course he was more than happy to indulge in him when he chose to stay home instead of going out to some friend’s party (less chances of getting picked up by some - shudder - girl!) but honestly he was terrified of everything and unbeknownst to him his dad had already plans to braven him up a little which may or may not involve some hostages (god did that Kamado boy irritate him but since he was Torao’s only friend he refrained from making…most of the complaints).
“Neeeeh! Worm!” Fuyu squealed and tried to reach for Kenji, squirming around in Kyoka’s death grip, a feebly cute attempt that had Mitsuri clapping her hands delightedly to catch the worm. Kyoka wrinkled her nose and took another step back. 
“Dad, can you just get Kenji to - OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD, DAD, HE’S THROWING THE WORM AT YOU!”
Perhaps he would’ve noticed, picked up the worm and thrown it back into the bushes on a normal day, but he was still staring hard at a blushing Mitsuri and wishing for a camera and half-heartedly reaching for the quivering Torao behind him.
Perhaps on a normal day he would’ve simply just made a sarcastic comment when the worm then landed on the top of his black and white striped shirt and flick it off, but today he was NOT expecting that and proceeded to yelp (the likes of which never have been heard of from OBANAI IGURO) and jump up and shake it off desperately.
“KYAAAAAH!” Mitsuri exploded into laughter, collapsing to her feet while Kyoka and Torao stared in horror. 
That was almost enough for Obanai to forgive Kenji, but not quite.
“Oh you sneaky little snake -” 
None of them knew it but maybe, just maybe, a little bit of their former Pillar selves returned when Obanai tackled Kenji to the ground and in turn Mitsuri had to tackle him off.
***
“Obanai?”
Strange. Usually it would be Mitsuri who fell asleep first but judging from her voice she wasn’t the least bit sleepy. Even more strange when Fuyu hadn’t caused any trouble that night; she lay peacefully drooling in between them. 
He blinked the gunk out of his eyes. “Yeah?”
“I’m so happy, you know that? I thought I couldn’t be when we started dating, then I was wrong when we opened the diner together, when we got married - Kyoka, Junko, Kenji, Torao, Fuyu…especially.” Mitsuri rolled over to face him, a sweet smile curving up her emerald eyes. “Thank you so much for all this.”
Obanai, careful not to nudge Fuyu, reached over to take Mitsuri’s hand. “Should be thanking you, stupid. Thanks for…loving me even though I’ve got the personality of  a lemon.”
That got a laugh out of her. “You can be pretty sweet when you want to. I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with you!”
“Why just stop at this one?” Obanai turned his head slightly, perfectly serious.
“True! It’ll be so amazing! Do you think we met in a past life too, Obanai?”
“Maybe. I don’t really care as long as you’re here right now.” 
“See, you can be sweet when you want to,” Mitsuri giggled softly, squeezing his hand. “Although you were pretty salty with Kaito when he came to drop Junko off. That was so mean, honestly. I hope you aren’t going to do that with Ryota.”
“He had it coming, taking her away like that - hold up, who’s Ryota?”
Mitsuri ultimately failed again at holding her laughter and woke up the whole household falling out of bed. 
***
“Of course. If you say you're fine with someone like me, then I will definitely make you happy.”
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milkywaygg · 2 years
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FOP-Lost Child Ch. 4
The next morning, while Darren was still asleep, Linnie had gotten up and got Julie ready for the doctor’s appointment, hoping for a physical check up and to examine the numerous scars that troubled Linnie so. After making sure Julie was nice and situated eating her breakfast, he dug through the closets to see if there was anything appropriate for the child to wear, before deciding to grab her a T shirt and some shorts out of a box of Chelsea’s old clothes as a child. They were a little big on Julie, as the shirt seemed to barely stay on her shoulders, but Linnie reassured her that they would go find some appropriate clothes once they were finished with the appointment.
The two found themselves back at the children’s hospital, Julie clinging on to her seat as she watched the children play with the wooden blocks and beads that were connected onto multiple colored wires. Noticing her behavior, Linnie smiled gently and rubbed Julie’s back, surprised that she didn’t jump.
“Sweetheart, don’t you want to play with the other kids while we wait? Maybe you’ll make a friend.”, Linnie offered gently. Julie just shook her head, causing him to frown sadly, “Why not? What’s the matter?”
“Why are you helping me?” Julie asked quietly, “I don’t deserve it.”
“What do you mean dear? Why don’t you deserve it?”
“Everyone always thinks I’m annoying. That I’m stupid and always want attention.”, Julie said sadly, “Even that other man doesn’t like me! He yelled at me and got angry. I didn’t want to make him angry, but I always do.”
“Oh dear.”, Linnie sighed softly, “Well uhm…honey of course you’re not annoying. You’re just a child. You need people to love and help take care of you.”
“But why does everyone hate me? How come you’re the only one who doesn’t hate me? Unless…you hate me too?”, Julie asked, waterfalls of tears threatening to spill. Linnie’s heart shattered into pieces and he pulled Julie close, hugging her tight.
“Oh now now, I don’t hate you. I like you very much, and I’m very glad I met you when I did. You remind me of my daughter when she was just a little girl.”, Linnie said, “And I don’t think anyone hates you. Are you talking about Darren? I-I know he can be in a bit of a bad mood at times, but his heart is in the right place. Sometimes he just doesn’t adjust well to change, darling.”
“Yeah but not just him.”, Julie said, making Linnie’s heart ache, “My mommy sometimes hits me when she has that icky brown water, and yells a lot too. I’m always messing stuff up when she’s around. Daddy also never gets out of bed. He just sits there and drinks wine and cries all day. Barely even notices me.”
“Oh dear sweetheart, come here.”, Linnie sighed, hugging Julie tight and rubbing her back, “I’m so sorry. No child should ever have to go through that. I know how much that hurts.”
“You do?”
“Mhm. See, my wife wasn’t very nice to me or my kids either, and you know, my daughter was a lot like you growing up.”, LInnie said, remembering that one night Nora had came home drunk after they had just finished dinner, “I remember one night after dinner, Chelsea wanted to help me with the dishes like she always does, but when her mother came back screaming, Chelsea grabbed my leg and begged me not to leave her.”
“Did you?”
“No of course not, dear. I just took her to bed so I could deal with Nora alone. Yes, it was uncomfortable but at least she was safe.”, Linnie sighed, before smiling at Julie, “And I would love to do the same for you. You deserve a good life, filled with people that love you, and I want to help you out the best I can. Is that alright?”
Julie was unsure of how to answer, but just nodded quietly before returning to watching the other children play. Fighting the urge to coax her to pick up some toys, Linnie eventually decided that he didn’t need to overstep his boundaries with her and decided to keep quiet until the doctor called her. After a good 15 more minutes, Dr Honeycomb opened the doors leading to the offices, calling Julie’s name, and leading them to one of the examination rooms. 
“Well, you’re looking a bit better than when we had last met. How have you been?”, he asked, smiling patiently at Julie. Julie didn’t say anything, but rather blushes and smiled shyly, “No problem. You don’t have to talk if you don’t want to. Let’s just get you weighed to see if we’re making any progress.”
Dr Honeycomb took Julie’s hand and lead them back down towards the hallways once more, turning a corner to the weight scale, and having Julie stand on it without flapping her wings. She did as she was told, and Dr Honeycomb smiled as she gained a pound, and seemed to have better balance on the scale.
“Well, it’s a start. I’m sure you’ll be a healthy weight in no time. Now then.”, he said, turning towards Linnie, “So, as you’re aware, we’re doing a physical, correct?”
“Yes, but I was wondering if you could take a look at sometime while you’re at it,”, Linnie asked, frowning worriedly, “There are a bunch of cuts and scars on her arms and legs, and I’m worried that they’ll get infected.” 
“Yes of course”, Dr Honeycomb knelt down gently, getting a brief look, “They don’t seem infected to me as none of them have a harsh red color around the area, or any crust. I will go ahead and document these and bandage them just so they don’t get infected in the future.”
“Alright thank you.”, Linnie sighed, as he took a seat towards the wall of the office, worried for Julie’s well being while also thinking about all the scars he had seen today. Watching as the doctor tended to her, Linnie couldn’t help but notice a sense of distrust towards Dr Honeycomb, even though he seemed like a perfectly nice and kind person to Linnie. She flinched whenever he attempted to take her arm to dab some disinfectant onto her bruises, and almost looked like she was about to cry the entire appointment. It took all his strength not to scoop the child up and give her a hug, wishing he could protect her from whoever was hurting her.
Why would you do something like that to a child, Linnie wondered. How miserable did you have to be to believe hurting a child would magically solve all your problems. Whatever excuse these parents had to abandon the poor child on the street and cause all the physical and emotional scars, Linnie was determined to make sure Julie escaped from the life she was living. To have the experience a child should be living. Instead of fighting for her life on the streets, she should be playing on the playground, and playing tag with her friends. It was all almost too much for Linnie to handle.
After a while, Dr Honeycomb finally finished tending to Julie’s wounds before handing Linnie a manilla folder, containing Julie’s documents, injuries, and x-rays; anything that was recorded on her behalf. 
“Well sadly, I can’t say this is the first time I’ve seen a child with this many scars.”, Dr Honeycomb commented, “But never have I seen so many in one place.”
“I know. It’s awful. I’m very concerned about her, and I’m not sure what I’m going to do next.”, Linnie said sadly, “I’ve planned on coming to the police and figuring out where her parents are, but I’m not so sure this poor dear should be going back to her parents at all.”
“You don’t think THEY’ve caused all of those, do you, Mr. Cosma?”
“I don’t know for sure, but she’s said some things that make me believe so. I probably shouldn’t repeat them.”, Linnie said quietly, “Anyways, thank you so much for looking after her. I know she seemed a little wormy and I think she’s just scared. Uhm, she’s not on our insurance so I’m not sure what you’d like for me to-”
“Oh, the receptionist should take care of it. Seeing as this is a special case, we might just be able to overlook the appointment and charge your insurance just this once.”
“Really? Thank you so much. You don’t know how much this means to me.”, Linnie smiled gently, clutching the folder in his hands as he reached out to Julie, “Come on sweetheart, we should probably head back to the house now. You’ve had a long day.”
Unlike the behavior he had seen with Dr Honeycomb, Julie seemed to be a bit more eager to respond, allowing Linnie to hold her hand, and walking almost right next to him, almost as if she were trying to hug him. Despite her rather anxious body language, Linnie couldn’t help but smile softly at the little girl, feeling somewhat proud that she was finally starting to trust him. Before he and Julie walked out of the doctor’s office all together however, Linnie had bumped into another green haired man, who groaned as the little boy in a purple shirt and overalls, and purple curly hair looked up, smiling. 
“Grandpa Linnie!”, the boy hugged, Linnie recognizing him as Poof. Linnie smiled warmly, kneeling down to give his grandson a hug.
“Hi sweetheart, I’m so happy to see you! I didn’t expect you.”, Linnie cheered, before looking down at the man, “Cosmo?”
“Watch where you’re going-Dad? ”Cosmo's tone immediately changed upon hearing his father’s voice, “What are you doing here?”
“I-uhm”, Linnie stuttered, Julie hiding behind his legs, “I’m just taking care of some personal business. What are you doing here?”
“Poof’s check up”, Cosmo said, with a somewhat bored tone, “Wanda was supposed to take him this go around since I have things around the house that needed to get done, but she ‘conveniently’ had to go to one of her father’s meetings at that garbage company. I swear, she always does this to me.”
“Does what, dear?”
“Every time something involving one of the kids needs to be done, she’s nowhere to be found, and then expects me to be ok with it just because she pays the bills around here.”, Cosmo complained, “And I’m like, what the hell does she need to go there so damn much anyways? Doesn’t he have his workers for all that stuff he does at the company? How about instead of running around and using the ‘I pay the bills’ excuse, you help you damn husband out with the kids. They’re your responsibility too.”
“You sound just like Daddy.”, Julie squeaked, catching Cosmo’s attention, causing him to raise an eyebrow.
“Dad, who’s this?”, Cosmo asked, studying Julie’s features, and felt himself jump back as he saw the condition she was in, and all the scars on her arms and legs, “And what happened to her? Why’s she got all those scars? And what’s with her nose? It almost looks as big as Darren’s.”
“Uhm, you know what, I think that’s something we can all discuss in private, dear. I don’t think this is the right time and place to talk about it.”, Linnie said, “Would you maybe want to come over for dinner tonight? I can explain everything then.”
“I don’t know. Depends on if Wanda’s lazy ass comes home to help with the kids.”
“Bring the kids, dear. I’m sure little Julie here could use a playmate anyways.”, Linnie said, before Cosmo and Poof’s names got called for the appointment.
“Maybe. We’ll see. Let’s go.”, Cosmo said to Poof before bringing him into the back offices, as Linnie continued to take Julie home, finally arriving back at the apartment. Upon entering the room, Linnie wasn’t surprised to see Darren at the TV, eating a bowl of ramen noodles he had left for him. Before striking a conversation, Darren waiting until Linnie had sent Julie for a nap, and took a seat on the couch next to him to clear his mind.
“How’d it go?”, Darren said, his mouth half full.
“FIne. She was very skittish at the doctors, but we were able to get what we needed.”, Linnie sighed, “Oh, and I ran into Cosmo on my way out.”
“Oh, is that so?”, Darren said, heart dropping suddenly, “I-I completely forgot to call him when I got out. Has he said anything about me?”
“Not really, other than Julie looking like you. I invited him over to dinner, so he and the kids may or may not be coming over this evening to discuss Julie.”
“Kids? Wait, Cosmo and Wanda finally did the deed, twice?”
“Mhm.”
“Great. As if my life couldn’t get any better.”, Darren groaned, remembering how much he and Wanda disliked each other, “Is she going to be there?”
“I’m not sure. Cosmo said she was working tonight.”
“God, I hope not. I don’t know what her problem is with me, but she always acts like I’m out to get her husband or something.”, Darren complained.
“Well, let’s just try to keep a more positive attitude about it.”, Linnie said, “After all, we’re here to discuss Julie, not any drama between you and Wanda. I’ll make sure we keep focus so that Wanda’s point of view against you will not be brought up, if that makes you feel any better.”
“Ugh fine I guess.”, Darren groaned, before noticing the envelope, “Are those her medical records?”
“Yes. This has everything from doctor’s notes, to her x-rays, so let’s try not to lose them, alright?”, Linnie asked, “I’m going to be taking these to the police within the next day or so. She’s uhm..said some very concerning things while we were waiting for her appointment.”
“Like what?”
“I don’t really want to say exactly, but something about her mommy and daddy hitting her.”, Linnie said, catching Darren’s attention.
“What the hell? Are you serious?”
“Darren language please.”, Linnie scolded lightly, “But yes, I’m very worried about her.”
“Damn, that’s crazy.”, Darren said, before receiving a sigh from Linnie, “So, what do we do now?”
“I guess there’s not much we can do until tomorrow. If you wouldn’t mind watching her tomorrow while I go to the police station and start a case after I get off work.”
“Shouldn’t I go over there too? I mean, they might want to ask me some questions since I was technically the first person to notice her.”, Darren brought up.
“Well, yes, I suppose so, but then we won’t have anyone to watch her-”
“What about that one lady you had helped with her niece? I mean, she seems like a nice person to me.”
“I’m not sure. I don’t really want to bother her.”
“What other choice do we have? Besides, it’s not like we’re leaving her with Julie all day anyways, It would just be for a few hours.”, Darren shrugged, taking his noodle cup to the kitchen to throw it away, “I’m just saying, sometimes you’ve gotta be resourceful. It’s ok if you need other people to do you a favor anyways, and it’s not like we can leave her by herself, especially since it’s obvious she can’t even go to the bathroom by herself.”
“Well.”, Linnie sighed, “I’ll give her a call, and if not, then one of us is going to have to stay behind.”
“Here how about this.”, Darren offered, “Call her, and if she can’t watch her, then I’ll go to the station since you’ll be with Julie as the nursery anyways and since you did her doctor’s visits. It’s not like I’m doing anything anyways.”
“Are you sure? I know you and the police don’t exactly get along.”
“Yeah well…”, Darren rolled his eyes, “This is important, and I got to do what I got to do. Uh…just let me know what she says, I’m gonna go shower before Cosmo and his bitch wife get here.”
Even though he was annoyed at his last statement, Linnie smiled at Darren as he watched him disappear into the hallway, proud that at long last, at least a little maturity was starting to show. Finally, he was starting to care about people other that himself. 
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sunphroggy · 3 years
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alright I have an au idea that im about to badly explain but it's a little strange so stick with me.
I call it: 'The Parent Trap but Opposite' au
So picture this: Tommy is Phil's only child, right. His mother died in childbirth so for his entire eight years of life its just been him and Phil. And that's fine, that's great, he loves it. Tommy doesn't want another addition to the family, it would only screw everything up.
That being said, Phil is lonely. Don't get him wrong, he loves his son and loves spending time with him, but he misses the feeling of being in love. He misses his wife.
Enter, Kristen.
They meet on a blind date, set up by a friend from Phil's work, and hit it off instantly. Months pass and Phil wants to propose.
One problem though. He hasnt told Tommy about it. He hasn't even introduced Kristen to him.
So what better way to merge both families that a holiday?
(I should probably say here that Kristen also has children. Take a wild guess who they are.)
Tommy is all for a holiday. Two weeks at a fancy ass hotel with room service, an arcade and a pool? Sign him up!
That is until, he finds out that Kristen and her boys will be joining them.
Enter, Wilbur and Techno.
(They're about fourteen. Their parents are divorced and, unlike Tommy, they knew Kristen was seeing Phil. They alse know that Phil is gonna propose - well, it's just a hunch)
Phil, god bless him, tries his hardest to get Tommy to warm up to Kristen, Wilbur and Techno. He plans all these activities and takes them all shopping, to the beach, to waterparks ect. But Tommy just won't take to them; he doesn't mind Kristen but Wilbur and Techno are weird, they keep making these cryptic comments about how they're going to be seeing eachother a lot in the future and Tommy just does not understand.
That is, until they decide to let Tommy in on the obvious.
Tommy, as expected, is in denial. Because there's no way his dad would do something like that without telling him first. Besides, Phil doesn't need to get married, they're perfectly happy just the two of them.
There's just no way.
Right?
Wrong.
Because Tommy is a curious little shit and he ransacks his and Phil's hotel room in search for the ring. He doesn't find it, of course, because Phil is used to Tommy's little raccoon tactics and hid it properly. But when he comes back from dinner with Kristen to a destroyed room and a confused Tommy, he decides to tell him the truth.
Needless to say Tommy has a fit. One moment, he's happy; just him and dad, living life. And then this lady and her shitty sons come along and fucks that up
(I imagine the conversation being something like:
Phil: Yeah im gonna propose Kristen
Tommy, inhaling deeply: *screams*
And then it would proceed to reinact that once scene from Steven universe with ruby and sapphire like-
phil: he'll eventually tire himself out :'D
Tommy, making even more of a mess than he already has: that's what you think! I am an eternal flame baby!! >:(
Yeah.)
Tommy, ever the drama queen, storms to Wilbur and Techno - who are like "we told you so :/" - and the three of them (because Techno and Wilbur also do not want this little racoon gremlin hybrid in their home either) team up and plan to ruin the proposal. The only problem, they don't know when Phil is gonna actually propose.
And this...this is where the hijinks and shenanigans ensue.
They just like, constantly ruin Phil and Kristen's date nights with their dumb shit.
(I'm thinking shit like the three of them stacked on each others shoulders in a trench coat pretending to be a waiter at the hotel restaurant Phil and Kristen are eating at and constantly spilling drinks and food of them whenever it looks like Phil is about to pop the question; following them on walks under the stars, hiding in bushes with binoculars and making birds attack them; tackling Phil into the pool ect. ect. ect.)
But, plot twist, while pulling off these epic plans, the three of them...bond! Dun dun dunnnnn!!! Wilbur and Techno actually grow to like Tommy and think "Hey, maybe this kid ain't so bad" so they back out on the plans and try to convince Tommy to do the same. He won't.
(Meanwhile, Phil is just wondering why all his proposal attempts have gone so fucking wrong like???)
Anyways, fast forward. Its the last day of their holiday the two families go out for dinner. Its nice, they're having a good time, Kristen is chatting away to Tommy about Minecraft and Tommy is happy to tell her all about his favourite game. And then, Phil clears his throat.
He starts talking about Kristen and how happy he makes her, and Tommy can tell what's coming the moment Phil reaches into his jacket pocket and pulls out a small black box. And, in a final attempt to keep the life he has, Tommy snatches the box out of Phil's hand and fucking runs.
He runs right out of the restaurant, ignoring everyone calling after him, and doesn't stop running until he's on the beach, where he hides. And he cries. He cries because his dad is gonna replace him with Techno and Wilbur, and he misses his mum even though he never met her, and because this he knows that stealing a ring and running away isn't gonna stop this proposal from happening, and because the only family dynamic he knows is going to change and he isn't ready for that. And it's just a big angst moment.
And then some fluff.
Kristen finds him hidden by the rocks, and Tommy quickly pretends he wasn't just crying bc he's a big man and shit like that. He half expects her to immediately call for Phil and then for Phil to disown him, but instead she sits with him.
She asks if he's OK and when he doesnt answer her she just goes on talking about random things as if Tommy didn't just ruin their entire holiday (about shit like how she thought the cake at the restaurant was too dry and about the stars and different constellations and she even continues asking him about minecraft) and Tommy, after a while, talks back to her.
They talk for a while, arguing about the best Minecraft block (Tommy wholeheartedly defending cobblestone like his life depends on it) until eventually Kristen asks why he did what he did. And Tommy explains everything (that can basically be summed up in "I'm scared of change")
It's just a wholesome moment really. They're just sitting behind a bunch of rocks, Tommy is spilling his guts and Kristen is just listening. And at then end of it she's there to give him a big hug.
(I imagine Tommy saying that one cliche line "please don't hurt my dad" and Kristen being like "I wouldn't dream of it" and then Tommy gives her the ring box)
But yeah, happy ending! Phil proposes to Kristen on the beach and it's all happy and nice and cool and Tommy, Techno and Wilbur watch and Techno starts crying a little bc he's so happy for his mum.
...
I came up with this last night when I couldn't sleep.
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heartshyuck · 3 years
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Pairing: Jisung x fem!reader
Genre: fluff, angst,slow burn, strangers to lovers au, first love, early 1900s au.
Synopsis: Lavenders symbolise purity, silence, devotion, serenity and grace. All endearing characteristics of the gorgeous boy, you met in the fields of purple.
Placed in the late 1930s , just before World War two starts, you flee from your family who are forcing you into a marriage. You lie low in a small village where you meet Jisung in a field of lavenders.
Word count: 23k lmao
Warnings: female reader, misogyny and very backwards ways of thinking, forced marriages, world war two + historical inaccuracy for progression of the plot, drinking
a/n: this is the longest fic i have ever written and honestly it was a mission, it took about a month to write and I am genuinely so proud of it and really happy with it. Please don't be scared by the length but when I say slow burn, I really mean it!
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Your legs seem to be moving on their own, feet hitting the ground at a steady and fast pace, you don’t look back and can’t seem to see what lies ahead but still you run until your lungs burn, run until the bitter metallic taste is at the back of your throat where bile threatens to rise. You run until finally your legs collapse, knees hitting the ground, grazing them and it’s the slight sting of the sediment seeping into the cuts that stop you from passing out. You’re not sure how far you’ve ran or how long you’ve been running, you don’t know where you're running to but you have to escape. 
Escape the life they’ve laid out for you, the one they’ve planned without your input, you can’t live a life where everything is set out, where ’everything is expected and perfect. A life where you’d get married at 18 to a stranger who was of a worthy social class, attend formal lunches with the wives of your husband’s work colleagues and host dinner parties and occasionally large balls in a manor that always felt empty no matter how many paintings you bought to hang on the never ending amount of walls, no matter how many more bookshelves you tried to fit into one room, a place that you’ll always hate. Then to have children by 20, as many boys as possible of course to then not have any say in their upbringing and watch nurses tend to them, your husband educate them and then watch them get married, meet your grandchildren and when you’ve reached a respectable age, death will meet you in your sleep and you’ll be mourned and then forgotten. A life filled with regret, a constant numbness, no fulfilment and no meaning.
You saw your mum live that life, a smile that never quite reached her eyes, always plastered on at any given moment as she walked around the large hall with a glass of nothing but champagne in hand greeting the hundreds of guests that you were never able to comprehend how she managed to remember them all. She never spoke unless spoken to, never put in any input and always obeyed your father even when you could see the frustration bubble up inside her as her eyes glinted and her jaws tightened with the urge to say something.
She would buy gifts upon gifts and shower you in expensive luxuries, spoil you in riches as a form of love and yet it always held another meaning behind it. There was a slight sadness in her eyes as she passed a gift every birthday,christmas and any other reason she found, almost as if she was saying sorry for the life you were going to live and how she’d use these moments as blackmail for when that time came. You’d overhear her quiet sobs when you would sneak around the house late at night, read letters she received from someone you didn’t know and how they wished for her life to get better and for her to find happiness in a world where happiness didn’t exist. You saw your mother cry when your father died, eyes bloodshot red in fear rather than grief. Her life was now uncertain and that's when you decided that you couldn't live an empty life, regretting choices and wishing for death to come to you first.
Your father had always made sure that you would receive a proper education, one where you'd read hours upon hours of the finest English literature, works of science and learned of the past and present politics. He always said "a lady should know about the world around her but should never venture off on her own" you hated that phrase but it was better than what you overheard your friend's father saying to her when she asked for him to explain the concept of communism, "a women does not need to busy herself with politics, for your brain could not even begin to comprehend it" he announced with his nose high up in the air as if he had just said the most inquisitive statement known to man. It baffled you how one could even think that, let alone truly believe it enough to announce it so stupidly in the open, it was obvious that women were capable of understanding concepts like politics, maths and science for you were living proof.
You did better than your brother at grasping algebra, better at them with understanding Versalius's "De humani corporis fabrica" and it didn't take your friend long to understand Karl Marx's theory on communism once you explained it to her. It angered you that this was dismissed especially when your brother soon went off to universities for they had outgrown your father's enormous library and knowledge, there was no more he could teach them but there was still much to learn and you yearned to do the same but as you approached a suitable age for marriage, your everyday classes on Shakespearean English, Tudor monarchy, Greek mythology and Italian art had now been replaced with sewing, crochet, dining etiquette and the differences between napkins, white laced ones for formal lunches, gold embroidery for important dinners and regular silk for everyday use, you'd recite to your mother and the many maids who were on standby.
You've left that world now, left the bustling streets of industrialised London where a black smog always hung around the air and the smell of burnt rubber that stung your nose, you always hated both. Though you grew up in a large estate where there seemed to be a never ending amount of land on the outskirts of London, you never were allowed out to explore. Only allowed out with your mother to pick out fabrics in the markets, surrounded by military men that guarded the general's wife and daughter but now you were alone, no guards, no mother and no black smog to block your view of what lies ahead, only the sun and the ocean sky, clear of clouds as you breathe in fresh air that cleanses your lungs from the toxins that hang in the city air, surrounded by vibrant lavenders that arrive with a strong, sweet smell of pollen which you welcome to replace the bitter rubber your sense of smell only seems to know.
You close your eyes and bask in the warmth of late August , the sun gleaming down on you, rays striking against your skin with the wind between the strands of your hair, blowing the lavenders and they slightly tickle your arms. You’re not sure how long you were in your euphoric trance but you weren't ready to leave yet when the dark shadow was casted over you.
Your eyes lazily open and beauty lies ahead, the sun gleaming behind him, lights him on flames and he burns with a presence so strong you can see it as his aura swirls around you, engulfing you. His features,strong and yet his eyes are soft and even as he's turned away from the sun they sparkle infinitely as they hold the brightest stars, his stare pierces through you and it makes your gut clench as you feel small under his gaze but you don't turn away, daring him to continue staring down on you, well that's what you tell yourself as you can't help but get lost in the beauty of his eyes. His face wears a worried expression, his hand out forwards for you to take and place in his and it takes you a while to realise he's trying to help you up, even longer to comprehend the words that leave his mouth, as you just watch his cherry red lips move. You're dazed and for the first time you're not thinking straight, your legs won't move to carry you back up onto your feet but your hand instinctively moves towards him and your own mouth gapes open as it does, and again he repeats himself emphasising the words as his eyes widen further “are you feeling well?” you stare blankly at him, no response until you feel the burning sensation of his hand in yours. A heat that sends shocks through every nerve, it runs through your bloodstream lighting you on fire and as if you were burnt you pull back, shaking off the dizzy spell you rise to your feet, your body finally responding to your screaming brain. A sense of relief washes over you as the fear of losing your mind slowly seeps out as the haze in your mind clears, until your eyes meet his again. “Really y/n, not for a boy” you cry out in your head as your mind seems to be lost in awe looking at him.
You shuffle uncomfortably and it’s just now you realise how much of a mess you look as the embodiment of beauty’s eyes fall down. Your expensive dress torn up, what was once a full sangria and silver ball gown was now rags that wrapped around you with the bottom half missing as it stopped just above your knees, an uneven hem due to the rough ripping which took all of your strength, the white net underneath was visibly stained a brownish yellow, the cuts on your knee not being the only thing the dirt seeped into  but his eyes don’t even seem to stop there, they didn't even seem to notice, only meeting a piece of paper that lied on the floor. He reaches down for it, his eyebrows perk up slightly before handing it back to you.“You dropped this” he avoids eye contact, continuing to stare down, his hand abruptly extends out in front of him and he clears his throat, adding to the excruciating awkwardness between you and you wince at the sudden sound.
“Oh thank you..” you can hear your voice waver and crack and for the first time in your life, your voice isn’t confident, seems like a day full of firsts, your mother would’ve been proud if she saw you acting like this, like a lady she would have put it. Quiet, reserved but really it was just a suffocating stiffness that lingered in the air.
“Jisung” he completes your sentence, a small, shy smile appears on his face as his eyes look at everything but you, the letter still in his grasp he shakes his hand at you slightly urging you to take it. Your fingers brush past his ever so slightly as you take the letter back into your possession, a spark is sent through you and your fingers twitch, as if wanting more but you stop them from moving any further, your eyes slightly widen as you catch yourself falling so easily and if Jisung catches the weird expressions on your face, he chooses to ignore them not saying anything. “You are not from around here, are you?” His voice is light and airy as he speaks softly, as if you were made of glass and any harsh tone could break you, you can’t tell if it’s because of the immense awkwardness or because of the pity he must feel seeing you in such a state. You hope it’s the former and decide that’s what it is, when he starts playing with the edges of his white shirt.
“No I live in London” the words die as soon as they leave your mouth, you used to live in London, you don’t anymore. This only adds to Jisung’s awkwardness and it reminds you no matter how beautiful he is, he’s only just a boy who’s probably around your age. So you smile at him, letting out a small breathy laugh in hopes of lightening the mood, it works as he visibly unstiffens. “Used to” Jisung doesn’t press on the matter any further, doesn’t ask anymore questions, just nods. The unsettling atmosphere sets in once again and your incapability of standing in silence for more than a second, you clear your throat "do you know where this address is?" your tone light and airy, you sound almost clueless and it’s now you realise the true meaning behind every etiquette class, the role of the women is the domestic war, the war on power. For one to rise they must make powerful allies and that’s what this voice is for, to obtain the power of a man and trick them into helping you; so you're glad when Jisung takes the letter back into his grasp and examines the writing at the front, it’s worked.
“I’ll show you the way” and you nod with a slight smile as a thank you, Jisung leads the way and you follow soon behind, with his face no longer in my sight you can finally observe the rest of him. Judging by his height and build, seems like he comes from a well off family. Though there wasn’t a day you felt hungry, you weren’t blind to the outside world no matter how hard your parents tried to shelter you from it. The world is living off rations but the wealthy still have access to more, Jisung must have some sought of status or most likely works for a household with high status considering it seemed like he was running errands, why else would he be in a field full of lavenders and it’s only reinforced by the fine silk that flows as wind rushes past you. Somewhat similar to the material that makes up your gown, or what’s left of it, it’s an expensive material imported from colonies in the empire. He walks with no flaw and so you guess he didn’t serve in the war, meaning he has to be around your age; this new life is exciting and scary, you’re not sure what you want yet but you certainly wouldn’t mind if the boy in the lavender field stuck around for a while.
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Jisung’s steps slowed and soon came to a stop outside a large estate, it was nowhere near as big as your parent's manor but comparing it to the small petite houses in the village you could just about see; it definitely was the biggest house in the village. You turned to thank Jisung, mouth slightly opened as the words were prepared to leave until you saw him pull out a key and a heat rose up your neck onto your face, in both slight embarrassment and excitement as you realised that Jisung must live here and your mouth couldn’t help but confirm your thoughts, “do you live here?” you blurted quickly with a slight lift in your tone, which you hope wasn’t too obvious in exposing your excitement.
His eyebrows rise, a small smile appears but he doesn’t answer your question, continuing to unlock the doors and allows you to step in first, a women who barely makes it past Jisung’s shoulders calls out to him, embracing him as she tightly wraps her arms around his waist, Jisung leans back slightly as a way of hoping to loosen her grip as his face scrunches up in pain as the struggle to breath sets in but there’s a constant smile on his face right until he peels her off. It’s then she punches him in the stomach, making him crouch down below her, holding onto his stomach.
“How many breaths must I waste in having to tell you to make sure you fulfill all your duties before you head to the fields'' she nags him and a smile is brought to your face at the violent display of affection, you guess he must be a part of the service team that works for the master of this house, which was exceptionally beautiful in the inside; much bigger than what it lets off from the outside, your eyes can’t help but linger elsewhere and observe the hidden beauty in all the small intricate designs. “Young master” the lady continues to punish him for his action and you head whips around at her words, she hasn’t even noticed you but Jisung’s eyes are constantly on you watching your expressions change as more as more information is being released to you, a smile appears on his face and at first it seems like a smirk but soon you notice the constant pink dust across his cheeks and you realise he’s embarrassed. There’s a strange feeling in your chest, a warmth that spreads and has you clutching your fists as you think at how adorable he is, your eyebrows furrow and you shake both the thoughts and the smile off.
Finally after what seems like hours of you staring at Jisung but in reality was no longer than a few seconds, the petite woman turns to you and acknowledges your presence,  her eyes widen in surprise and she rushes to your side. “Oh lord, my dear child are you okay?” she grabs your hands and ushers you down the hall into a secluded room that takes up a big portion of the ground floor of the house.
The kitchen, filled with plenty of workers,busy hands and food; she shouts at a maid to move a few things around and to make some space for you around the small table that holds vegetables and freshly cut meat. There’s the smell of spices that are definitely too exotic to be from these lands, parcels with German writing and several people cooking dishes you don’t recognise.
You're pushed down onto a small wooden chair that slightly rocks and it is by far the most uncomfortable place you’ve ever sat but you don’t dare complain even after the minutes pass and your legs begin to ache. The maids ran around you and even as you left that world behind, you still somehow ended up in the same position and then you realise it’s the fine silk you wear that sets you apart, the rows and rows of pearls around your neck and rings on your fingers. They don’t ask any questions, just wiping away at the dirt on your legs; the same women at the door pouring a type of alcohol over your cuts and it stings drawing out a hiss from you, “sorry” she whispers and blows slightly on the irritated skin. The kitchen quiets down and the other maids exit, leaving you and the same women who scolded Jisung, she didn’t bother to ask him any questions and quickly sent him away to carry on with the work he didn’t finish, she doesn’t ask you any questions either for it’s not her place to ask. 
She wraps bandages around your knees and your eyes wander around, landing on a picture of her with three little boys, you recognise the smallest to be Jisung, she catches your eyes and smiles “the masters, when they were little devils” she remarks making you and her both let out small laughs, “though they aren't much better now” she smiles fondly as she continues to wrap the bandages, you see love in her eyes and can tell that she raised them.
“The smallest is Jisung, am I correct?” you ask just to confirm your assumption, she nods and smiles, “i can tell by his awkwardness, it’s radiant even in pictures” you scoff and she laughs. "Who are the other two?" Your curiosity seemingly has no end.
"The tallest is master Jeno and the one in the middle is master Jaemin" she says as she cuts the bandage. You take note of their names and match it to their appearances though you assume they've probably changed quite a bit. The tallest, Jeno has crescent moons for eyes as his smile pushes them up, it's adorable. The middle, Jaemin also has a bright smile, probably the prettiest you’ve ever seen but Jisung still stands out the most to you, maybe it’s because you’ve seen how he looks now; the change is definitely visible, he’s grown much taller and into his sharp features. He's definitely handsome, epitome of beauty but by the way he timidly walks you’re not quite sure he knows it.
“Will these do, ma’am?” her hands hold onto a set of clean clothes and you only nod at her as you take the clothes from her hands, calloused and rough from years of labour. "Please just call me y/n" you tell her trying to remove your status and she only nods in return. "And what may I call you" you ask her.
"Daphne" she replies and you notice that she smiles at you, a full smile nothing quite like you've seen before and you'd like to think this what a smile should look like. Genuine. Instead of all the small smiles you recieved, the ones with hidden agendas and meanings, the ones because of who your father was, the one because of your status, name, title, money and a persuasion for your hand in marriage. So many smiles yet none truly considered one. God you hated that life.
"Now y/n let me show you to a room" she leads you out the room and you follow her upstairs, all the maids rushing back into the kitchen after you have left. She turns left and right and you find that the upstairs is far more complicated to navigate, with many different rooms. When she finally reaches a long corridor, she stops to point at the room that awaits at the end. "That will be your room ma'am" and before she even could finish her sentence properly, "y/n" you correct her and she only nods, giving you a soft smile as an apology."Please call for me if anything isn't to your liking" she says and just as she's about to step away, ready to leave you to get comfortable.
You call her back, "Daphne, can you please tell me who this is" you lift up the small blue letter that leads you here to this address, to finally put a name to the mysterious woman who only seemed to want the best for you and your mother. She takes the small letter from your grasp, examining the small font that's slowly fading due to the number of years it's collected dust. Her eyes widen as she reads the letter, her head snapping up to look at you, her lips parting slightly as if her jaw threatened to drop.
"My god" she says as she continues to read, shock written all over her face, "this is from the master's mother, dear" she tells you and you join her in shock as your jaw hangs a lot more obviously in shock. "She worked for your family when she was young" she continues to tell you and the ripples of shock continue to pulse through your body. Your mother and her are good friends from what you've gathered, reading all the letters you found. Yet your mother never even allowed you to mix classes, always telling you to stick with your own people, people who can pay for your time, literally. Yet here she was being friends with a woman considered below her, even considering sending you away to her. The hypocrisy is what shocked you the most, for you didn't think your mother could build relationships if it weren't for a social advantage.
"Can I meet her?" you ask, excited until you see sadness seep into her eyes, she looks down and she shuffles slightly. Her eyes glossy with tears threatening to fall and your own shoulders droop down and a frown is formed on your lips. "I'm sorry" you apologise but she shakes her head and wipes her eyes slightly.
"Don't be silly, you didn't know and it's better you found out through me anyways." She tells you and you're glad that you found out through her too, you don't think you would've been able to handle it coming from Jisung. "If you do not mind me, but when did she pass" you ask carefully as to not break her.
"Last May" she tells you and you hear sadness in her voice , as it slightly cracks and you release a deep sigh as to rid your body from the contagious mood. With that she hands the letter back into your hand and leaves you to wash up, "Dinner will be ready soon, please wash up" she urges you to go into the room.
You walk down the corridor, steps heavy as your heart grieves for Jisung and as you're reminded of your own father's death, though he planned on marrying you to a stranger you didn't love and never truly wanting you to live happily. You loved and still love him with every ounce of your being, all making grief an impossibly hard process. For your heart hurt and your mind could not comprehend why.  Your eyes stung with tears and your hands trembling with pain and still the mind was questioning why you felt sad. Then the guilt blooms, hovering above you, for this man raised you and cared for you and yet you question your grief as you sit by his deathbed. Yet you remind yourself that questioning your grief is better than not feeling any at all, you remember looking over towards your mother who wore black and instead of grieving her husband's death, she felt grief for her widow status that crushed her social status, for who was she without her husband.
So as you remove the many pearls and diamonds around your neck, gifted to you by your mother, you’re reminded why you left that life behind. You won’t be defined by your husband but by what you have achieved and for who you are. Yet you leave on the thin golden chain with a single pendant on your neck, as a reminder for where to come from and how far you’ve travelled. It was a gift from both your mother and father, the one gift you like to think wasn’t used as a symbol of your wealth to attract men in asking for your hand in marriage, the simplicity of this necklace led you to believe that this was a genuine gift of their love.
Changing out of your ball gown or the remainders of it, you feel anew. Stripping out of your old skin and into much comfortable and humble ones, you feel as if your new life is finally starting and though it’s far from what anyone would have wanted for your life to be like, it’s what you want. You’ve been here for just under an hour and instantly you're on cloud nine, floating to where only the sun is. The rays dancing on your skin and euphoria runs within your veins, this is life.  
You’re not sure how long you’ve been in a daze but soft knocks on the door is what awakens you and you're quick to open the door, not wanting to leave the person on the other side waiting but you’re met with a fist, that seems as if it malfunctions as it goes down by the side of the same person who seems to waking you out of all your dazes recently. Jisung stands there awkwardly, legs crossed and hands behind his back, he stutters as he says “dinner is...um.. It is awaiting” and with that he cuts himself off, rushing the words out of his mouth and quickly turns around, rushing downstairs.
You can only smile at him, how was someone allowed to be that cute. Following soon after him you enter into the dinning room, the smile on your face completely wiped off by the shock of two other men sitting around the table. Your back straightens as your body stiffens, by habit, you’ve been taught to look most confident when caught off guard.
“Sit here y/n” Daphne takes out the seat opposite of Jisung and next to a man you don’t know until he smiles your way, you recognise that smile and it’s still as pretty as it looks in the picture hanging in the kitchen. You smile back at him as you make your way by his side and take your seat.
“Hello, I’m Jaemin” he turns to you, dropping his fork and it clatters as it hits the plate, a beautiful smile across his face and you finding it comforting to think it hasn’t changed at all. He then lifts your hand to his lips, placing them softly on your knuckles all whilst keeping that damn smile held across his lips and staring straight into your soul, heat rises up your body slightly thrown back and he can see the shock in your eyes . Your well crafted facade cracking. His eyes are still boring into yours and you can’t move, stuck looking into his eyes, hands stuck to his until a kick. Coming from across the table, a force hits Jaemin’s shin causing him to yelp, instantly turning away from you and dropping your hand, you notice a small smile on Jisung’s face as he tries to conceal his laughter. You turn to look at where such a force came from, fierce strong features and an intimidating stare yet when he turns to you crescent moons appear, his aura changing immediately and the child in the portrait comes to life. “I’m Jeno” his voice is soft yet clear and all you can do is smile back before replying simply your name “Y/N” you tell him and he nods your way. 
Thinking that silence would now set in was foolish of you, for you should’ve guessed Jaemin isn’t the type to let there be silence and looking back now you could definitely tell he was itching to ask you so many questions. “I guess you have already met Jisung” he turns to you again and you only nod, looking up at the tall boy in front of you but he only stares at the soup in front of him but you know he senses your gaze as he twitches slightly in his seat, holding himself back from looking up and directly into your eyes. “He is not usually this quiet, he will warm up to you soon” Jaemin apologises on behalf of Jisung yet he grimaces at the words that leave Jaemin’s mouth but you smile at Jaemin ignoring Jisung’s expression.
The rest of dinner is filled with small talk between you and Jaemin, him asking you your favourite colour and trivial things like that, you discussed different authors and scriptors to which Jeno also chimed in on the conversation, both very impressed on your knowledge though you aren’t sure if they were impressed because you were a woman or genuinely impressed by the vast knowledge you had accumulated over the years spent in your father’s library however you brushed that thought aside, carrying on with the conversation, eyes drifting to Jisung at times who just sat there playing around with spoon, twisting it between his fingers instead of daring to look at you let alone to add to the conversation. Finally as Daphne takes away the plates, Jeno stands up dismissing himself from the table, “It was a pleasure to meet you Y/N, I hope you stay a while it was fun having you” he tells you with those same moons for eyes and you thank him for his hospitality “It was a great pleasure to meet you too, thank you for allowing me to stay” you say them at Jeno and Jaemin but they’re mainly directed to Jisung who brought you here.
“If there’s anything you need, don’t hesitate to tell me” Jaemin smiles, a hand on your shoulder as he stands next to where you sit and you only nod at him, he then comes to your ear, lips so close you feel them brush against the shell “Jisung will come around, I’m sorry if he’s making you feel uncomfortable” he apologises on his behalf for the second time that night and you wave him off with a smile. You could already tell that Jisung is shy and awkward but it’s not confused for hate or resentment, he simply doesn’t know how to act around a female and it’s clear the way he trips over his words and his very own legs but to be fair they are very long.
After everyone left the table and made their ways to their own rooms, you too made your way to bed. Laying there you think back to how far you’ve come, a few months ago this all would have been nothing but a dream and now it’s a reality and the euphoric feeling you imagine is everything and more. Freedom is worth anything is what you’ve learnt, the freedom to live your life the way you want. To be in control of all your decisions, living with the consequences but not a single shred of regret because you chose it and therefore it must have been for a reason. It’s new and exciting but so scary as the colony of butterflies bloom in your stomach, all the possibilities panning out in your head and for some reason as you drift off to sleep that night, you see Jisung in this future of yours.
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The sun shined in through the sheer curtains of your room, sunlight dancing on your skin and the warmth made you feel alive as it tingled. The house was quiet and as you look out the window you realise that even the Sun has still yet to wake fully, still sleepy rising out of the horizon. The birds chirp and the lavender fields roar as the wind dances but there in the middle of it all is a figure. Jisung. Your eyes light up and your legs are quick to move, still in your nightgown, hair in a mess you rush to meet him there. The stairs creak as you step down them slowly, as if a child trying not to get caught, you try your best not to wake a soul.
Once out the door you run out towards the purple sea, the cold morning air refreshing to the midday humidity that sticks your clothes to your skin, instead the wind blows through you and you feel free as all boundaries and confinements are washed away but then it hits you, causing your legs to halt. Jisung barely knows you, how weird it would be for you to run up to him at the break of dawn? Very weird you decide as you slowly make your way back to the house, hoping to not make any noise that might draw his attention your way.
Stepping back inside, your back against the heavy wooden door you let out a deep sigh as your eyes fall closed in relief. Thank god he didn't see you, you think to yourself as you just stepped into the living room and your heart dropped down to your stomach, lungs stopping as you see him there. Jisung flicking through a book, his eyes come up to meet yours which are blown out in shock as you stare between him and looking back at the door, his lips fold into a line and you practically see the questions forming in his mind as he scratches the top of his head.
“Good Morning” you say with a smile but the embarrassment isn’t covered well, eyes everywhere but his. He softly replies with a mumble you’re unsure if he actually said anything back or if you just made it up but as your eyes land on the book in his hand and all thoughts are banished. You rush round the table, Jisung’s eyes wide now as it’s his turn to be shocked as you sit down beside him, taking the book out of his hand to have a look at the title. “Ah a classic” you say as your fingers run over the title and Jisung only nods at your words. “Is it your favorite Shakespearean play?” you ask in hopes of starting up conversation, all you get in return is nod of the head but that does nothing but urge you to talk again to fill the silence. “I like Hamlet but i think Macbeth is my favourite. The best character being Lady Macbeth, a strong ambitious women” you state and Jisung only laughs at this causing you to turn back to him.
“She had lost her mind” he laughs again and you smile
“Yes but as a woman she exerts power and it’s not really seen much in female characters in stories and real life” you tell him, explaining how a woman like her is admirable for her strong spirit.
“Yes but doesn’t Shakespear describe her to have a masculine soul that within a femine body, he is saying the ambition and power are masculine and therefore is she really a good embodiment for strong powerful females?” he argues back, questioning you and you can’t help but smile.
“But he uses her and the witches to plant the idea of murder in Macbeth’s head, he shows that they are powerful and can achieve what they want through manipulation which he explains to be a women’s method, they are in control of the men and it shows that if it weren’t for social confinments that they would pursue their ambitions for themselves, is Macbeth really the one in control?” you question him back and he smiles
“You win” he laughs and pride is struck through you, there’s no feeling quite similar to winning a debate but there's sadness at the bottom of your gut as you remember and miss your brothers who you would debate with until frustrations would burst out of you all and it leads to punches being thrown around.
“Let me guess, you hate Romeo and Juliet” he expects you to say yes and you know it’s because he probably thinks their love for each other is shallow but you can’t say you do.
“I don’t actually, aside from the whole love at first sight, I somewhat relate to it” you tell him eyes staring at him but unfocused as you think back to how your own life was in comparison to Juliet’s, “the being forced into something you don’t want and dying for your freedom, in this case her freedom was Romeo but i don’t think he was the only reason she chose to flee, I’d like to think ran away for herself and to allow herself her own choices in life” and then silence as Jisung took in your words, a perspective he had never really thought about, the story was always solely based on romance but then again he had never been put in the position of being forced into something so life changing such as marriage. Jisung couldn’t begin to comprehend how it felt to be used so obviously for social gain and being stripped and deprived of anything else that would hinder that.
 Sensing stiffness in the air, you had to do something about it, you finally got Jisung to actually have a conversation with you. “Still Macbeth is the best” and again you manage to get a laugh out of him. The sound is so sweet that angels come down to listen to it, the heavens split open at the first bubble of laughter that leaves his mouth and your eyes light up as your body tingles with pride for causing it, you’re addicted to it and you're itching to hear it again. You need to hear it again.
The moment is cut off though with the entrance of Jaemin and Jisung’s eyes avert to his brother greeting him a good morning as quietly as he did to you and Jaemin sleepy replies in a yawn, rubbing his eye  before sitting down opposite you. “Morning y/n” he greets you and you smile before greeting him back, turning back to Jisung to hopefully start up the conversation again. “So what else are you reading?” you ask and your eyes light up as you scan over the many books on the table before you.
“Oh y/n, you know how to read!” Jaemin jumps up, it wasn’t expected for someone to be literate to the extent they could read Shakespeare or any higher educational scriptures, unless of a high class, let alone a women but your father taught you all he could and then you leached off your brothers who were lucky enough to be sent to school but Jaemin had already been aware of this “Yes my father taught me” you tell him and he nods rapidly.
“Yes I know, I just thought you’d like to know that there’s a library upstairs if you ever get bored and want to read something” he tells you and excitement bubbles up inside you and the instinct to run up there and have a look at their book collection is something far harder to conceal then it should be and Jaemin laughs at your eagerness. “Jisung could use someone like you, he’s always trying to get away from his studies” and you hear Jisung let out a nervous laugh as you turn towards him, completely offended.
“You have the privilege of being able to study and you want to run away from it” you gasp and it causes Jaemin to laugh again but this wasn’t a laughing matter, you were completely serious. You would die to be in his position and something about the way Jisung holds an apologetic look makes you think he knows you would.
“I guess you’ll just have to be with him to help him study” Jaemin offers a solution and your eyes light up at this, the excitement running through your veins. You all know exactly what that means, yes it’s babysitting Jisung to make sure he gets all his work done but it also means you get to study whatever he’s learning and expand your knowledge as far as you can. Jisung seemed hesitant at first but after seeing how you visibly lit up at the suggestion he couldn’t help but agree to take you along with him when he had to study.
After breakfast Jisung led you up to the library, it was a large room filled from ceiling to floor with books, the sight alone made you dizzy with excitement, as you stepped in the beloved smell of old books filled your senses and your hands instantly rushed to run along the spines of every book. Your eyes sparkled as you looked over each one and Jisung watched as fascination completely engulfed you, he couldn’t stop watching as you pick out a book, couldn’t take his eyes off you as your eyes skimmed the blurb, he was mesmerized by what he wasn’t too sure of. His eyes didn’t seem to be able to move on from your figure until you turned to face him, time stood still as he watched more and more of the bright smile that was held across your face be revealed to him, you were beautiful. Once met with yours, his eyes scrambled away as they always do and he was quick to turn around and seat himself at the desk that sat in the centre of the room.
You too situated yourself on one of the more comfortable chairs, opposite to Jisung, you watched him begin to write, his head slanted and both arms splayed out on the table, he was the height of beauty and grace, the gods carved him from marble, so ethereal Aphrodite herself was jealous of his perfection, Apollo envied his grace. Though you were here to study, read as many books time allowed you, your eyes were distracted and little did you know they were distracting Jisung as well. Your gaze causes his breath to halt, his hands to sweat and pink dust to decorate his skin. You were dazed, stuck in a trace of his beauty and had to do something to get out of it, you clenched your hand; nails digging into your palms, pressing hard to wake you. You forced your head to the side, eyes looking at the bookshelf once again but your actions caused Jisung to look up, you can feel his stare on you and a shiver is sent through your spine, too scared to look back at him, afraid you’ll be pulled back into his trance.
“You have a lot of German books” you say, hoping your nervousness isn’t obvious and just to be sure you get up and head towards the books. You feel him staring at every step you take and you just pray you're the only one that can hear the loud thumping of your heart against your ribcage as a colony of butterflies bloom in your stomach. Fingers tracing over the German writing on the spine of each book, you try to distract yourself from him and try to compose yourself once again but then his voice echoes through the room, deep and smooth it sends shivers rippling through you.
“My father was stationed in Germany” he tells you as his eyes finally move away from your figure, a sense of relief washes over you as he continues to write once again. Yet you're still too nervous to turn around, too nervous to look at him, he who is the epitome of beauty.
“Still?” you ask, filling in the silence as you pull out another book, examining the words on the front cover but you instantly regret it as Jisung’s eyes fall back onto you.
“After the war he was assigned a higher position in the Rhineland and then after they were dismissed he was asked to stay along the French borders'' he tells you and once again your curiosity gets the best of you and you ask him another question. If you remember correctly, it’s been 10 years since the dismissal of the troops in the Rhineland.
“So when was the last time you saw him?” and instantly you regret the words that leave your mouth, your curse yourself a million times over. Jisung’s silence is all too overwhelming and your chest grows tighter as guilt takes over your body and just as you’re about to apologise, he answers
“He visited last year” Jisung simply states but you can hear the strain in his voice, the pain he’s tried his best to cover yet it seeps through and your glad you can’t see him right now because you couldn’t bare to see the sparkle in his eyes fade slightly as you remember the passing of his mother, that most probably led to his father returning back home. Silence settles again and your frozen by the shelves, the air so heavy it feels as if weights were holding you down, your mind hazy as you space out and as the common pattern goes, Jisung wakes you out of the depths of your mind with a voice as smooth as honey, it provides a comfort that sends shivers down your spine.  “He’ll be back soon though, he’s officially been discharged for retirement” he tells you as if he can feel your stiffness and out of the corner of your eye you see he’s giving you a small comforting smile, just to make the air seem a little lighter.
Time seems to fly past as you both sit there, Jisung’s hands busy writing away as he refers back to scriptures and your eyes busy as you read up on German politics and the structure of the Weimar constitution, that revolutionised democracy, the sun was now high in the sky as noon approached. You didn’t even notice until Jisung let out a loud yawn, arms above his head as he stretched and let out mumbles of how you should stop for today or at least take a break. You only nodded in response as you stretched your own limbs out, you had ended up curled up in the chair with your legs tucked away as you leaned into what you were reading. Jisung couldn't help but smile as he looked up occasionally to see your eyebrows furrowed as you read and he can't help the soft laugh from escaping his lips now as he watches you stretch. "And what is it that you find so funny?" You question him, eyes narrowed but your lips are clearly fighting back a smile and the sight of it flusters Jisung, stammering over his words ``N-Nothing" he answers and you let out a small smile to let him know you were only kidding.
As you both leave the room, you can't help but follow Jisung "and what is it you do after you are done studying?" Your question startled him as he visibly flinched at the sound of your voice and he mentally tells himself to get used to your unquenchable curiosity. "Except for picking lavenders" you tease. He lets out a soft laugh, the same sound you've been itching to hear since this morning.
"Nothing much" he tells as he makes his way down the stairs. Following him down, he makes his way towards the drawing room, sitting himself down in an old velvet chair, you place yourself beside him in a matching one. Your eyes peering over towards his hands that pull at needle and thread and you’re astounded by the sight in front of you, a male who knows how to sew is as rare as diamonds, as impressive as gold. Jisung continuously stuns you, his nimble fingers work diligently as they pull the thread to make patterns across the once plain cloth.
He can feel the burn of your stare on his hands, his chest tightens and his nerves are lit on fire, he is hyper aware of every wander of your eyes. His mind clouded by the mere thought of you watching him, his mind so fixated on impressing you, for a reason he’s not sure of, he doesn’t pay much attention to the needle any longer; a mistake he realises once the sharp point collides with the soft skin of his index, drawing blood. He flinches back away from the sharp contact as you leap forward to cup his hand in both of yours. Pressing your thumb against his finger, applying pressure in hopes of stopping the seeping blood, you slightly blow upon it to relieve it of any pain but Jisung can’t feel any pain not when your overwhelming heat rolls of you and radiates on to his skin, with every touch sparks fly on top of his skin fizzling underneath and seeping into his bloodstream. A fluttering blooms in his stomach and Jisung has no idea what this feeling is, it’s new and exciting. He craves it as his eyes drift to your worried face and once your eyes meet his, the emotion is buried by the overwhelming nervousness he feels engulfing him, his cheeks flush and his breath is caught in his throat. He pulls away from you and quickly stands “I’ll” he pauses thinking what to say next “I’ll get a bandage” he spits the words out as soon as his mind comes up with the excuse.
“I’ll get it, sit down” you stand up and ready to head towards any one of the maids that could help you but your steps are interrupted by Jisung’s voice once again.
“No it’s fine, I’ll get it” he blurts out, hand stopping you as he places in front of you, your head moving back on reflex, and with that Jisung runs out the room; feet moving fast as his left hand tightly wraps around his right index.
You sit there for what felt like forever waiting for Jisung’s return but in reality it was no more than 10 minutes, you were never one to hold patience. So you rose to your feet, eager to find the tall boy that let awkwardness roll off of him. Heading to the direction you saw Jisung turn, you make your way to the familiar kitchen, many busy bodies work their way around preparing for dinner as the clock is nearing sun fall. Your eyes wander the familiar walls with the same pictures you stared at upon the first day of your arrival, until they stopped on the figure they seeked. There he stood by the wooden table that just about reached his waist. He poured flour into a bowl, followed by two eggs and your eyes watched his every moment again and as if he could sense you, his rose to meet you once again. You smile because it just comes so naturally when with him and he smiles back, how could he not?
Inviting yourself in, you step closer towards Jisung, “A cook too” you say, you’re impressed and it’s evident in your voice.
“It’s a basic necessity” he says yet there’s a pink coating that dusts his cheeks, you know he’s flattered by your words despite his own.
“Basic necessity?” you question as you sit down, legs crossed, on an empty wooden chair just by where he stands “I guess I should learn” you state nonchalantly, not expecting the reaction it would provoke from Jisung. His head snaps to turn to you, his eyes searching your face for any indication that you were only pulling his leg, that this was only a joke but those indications never showed because this wasn't a joke, you were serious.
“What? Does a girl have to know how to cook?” you question him in a scoff, an eyebrow raised as you question his thoughts that control his expressions.
“No they don’t but I can be surprised, I know you are surprised I can” he rebuttals, calling out your hypocrisy but to this you only smile, you were glad Jisung could stand his own ground, it wouldn’t be fun otherwise.
“More impressed than surprised” you state, earning a smile from Jisung once again, you pat yourself on the back each time you manage to pull out that sweet, healing smile that seems to wash all worries away.
“Who’s to say I’m not impressed” he questions you once again and continues to mix the batter, adding more ingredients, again you smile at his words and Jisung feels his heart flutter at every stretch of your lips. He craves to see it more.
“Can you teach me?” your question catches him off guard and his eyebrows leap up into the soft brown hair that covers his forehead, “what I’m not totally hopeless, I’ve read a book on it before” you pout. Laughter rings through the air as Jisung has doubled over, unable to hold in the snorts and his breathing unsteadies as your words register in his head and this only makes your pout more prominent and your eyebrows knit together.
“I’m sorry” Jisung laughs out as his eyes fall onto your expression but he can’t hold it in, a few bubbles of laughter spilling out as he tries to calm his breaths, his eyes glossy as tears threaten to fall and you try to fight back your own laughter as the corners of your lips slightly perk up. “Did you say you read a book on cooking” he can’t even get through the sentence without laughing but he’s quick to reign it back in to allow you to answer.
“Yes” you say proudly, head still held high and Jisung bites down on his lips as the splutters of laughter threaten to escape again. “It’s obviously not the same thing but I’ve read basic methods” you state in defence.
“You make it sound like science” he scoffs at your words and you roll your eyes at his.
“Is it not, the mixing of substances to achieve a product. It sounds like alchemy to me” you explain your thought process and Jisung nods in agreement. Though you can tell he has something to say.
“Alright then, let us say cooking is science” he begins and you raise your eyebrow in questioning as to where this is leading “reading a method for an experiment is not the same as doing the experiment, there are things that are not accounted for, practical errors, measuring errors. The method tells you what to do but not how to do it” and before he can even finish his sentence properly you jump up, startling him slightly as he flinches back.
“And that is where you come in to teach me, guide me through the experiment” you plead but it sounds like he doesn’t really have an option, you’re practically telling him. He sighs but he has to give, how could he not when you're giving him your sweetest smile and when your eyes are practically begging him.
“I’m surprised you want to learn” he questions you “I thought you’d avoid anything that would have been forced upon you” he explains as he hands you an apron.
Your smile extends ear to ear as you take the apron from his hands, tying in behind your back you explain your sudden want to learn “Yes but I’m choosing to learn, this isn’t about adding another quality of a wife to my resume. This about extending my knowledge and as you said it is a basic necessity.”
Jisung only nods at your answer as he hands you another bowl, some ingredients already placed inside “follow after me” he says as he cracks an egg and pours it’s insides into the bowl and then turning to you he see you struggle, knocking the egg against the table softly you try and mimic his actions “Did the book not mention eggs?” he laughs and so does Daphne who observes close by as you send him glares that wish him death.
“Like this” he says as he places his hands over yours, guiding you but your eyes aren’t focused on the egg in your hold, you’re focused on Jisung who’s so close, too close. You feel his breath on the side of your neck and goosebumps arise on the surface of your skin as shivers are sent down your spine. The scent of cotton, jasmine and of course lavenders invade your senses and blur your mind. You can’t help but stare at Jisung, perfection personified as he concentrates on explaining how to assure no shell falls into the batter. Yet the words enter one ear and exit the other as you watch his lips move, your eyes stuck and it’s only when his eyes move up to meet yours does he also realise the little space between the two of you. His hands still holding onto yours, his eyes move down. Slowly they trace the features of your face, the bridge of your nose, the dip of your cupid’s bow and then they stop at your lips. His breathing halts, his heart skips beats as it dances in his chest and when he feels unbearable heat take over him he forces himself away from you. Quickly flinching back, his warmth leaves you, he clears his throat and turns from your gaze that still stares, he continues showing you what to do and no more words are exchanged as the heaviness in the air sets in.
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Many weeks go by where you and Jisung spend all your mornings in the library, which had now become your favourite spot in the house, you look forward to picking up a new book every morning, look forward to watching Jisung so focused on his work, telling him all about what you’ve learnt and occasionally sparking up a debate but you also find yourself staring out the window wishing for the sun to only raise itself higher and higher as you wish for midday to arrive, to run away with Jisung down into the kitchen where he continues to teach you how to cook, some days he would take you into town to pick out fresh ingredients or some days into the drawing room where he attempts to teach you how to sow. After a few failed attempts, your patience wearing thin and much blood being drawn from your fingers, you give up on sewing however cooking is a much greater achievement and the outcome was worth every bit of it. The smile on Jisung’s face every time he’d taste something he’d liked, every time you remember a part of a recipe and every time he would sit down at the dinner table and Jeno or Jaemin would compliment your cooking. He felt immense pride in you and it fostered a love for cooking within you.
Other days when the weather prohibited it, Jisung would take you out into the lavender field. You’d sit in between the rows and rows of purple, picking at the prettiest ones.The sun high in the sky, august warmth embracing you as the wind blew over the roaring fields, dancing between your hair. “Look I learnt this from a book” you sit beside Jisung, his head snaps up and his attention is on your fingers now as they twirl the thin stems in and around each other to form a knot. “Purity, silence, devotion and grace are what a lavender symbolise” you begin to tell him “and you Jisung” you place the intertwined lavenders behind his ear, he’s visibly flustered as his cheeks turn hues of pink and it only urges you on “are exactly that” you whisper to him as if the lavenders had ears and could hear your confession, for these words are for Jisung’s only.
Jisung’s eyes widened as each word that was revealed to him, his heart thumping in his chest and his mind set on fire as chaos engulfed him. His thoughts scrambled and instantly his mind went to countless different possibilities as to what those words meant but looking up at you his mind cleared for he only saw beauty. The beauty your eyes held, as they sparkled infinitely each time they skimmed over the countless words on a book, the beauty your smile held when someone complimented your new found cooking skills, the beauty in your voice each time you called on him as the new found nickname “sungie” which caused his heart to melt, the beauty you held in the way you carried yourself never letting anyone put you down. Jisung adored you in every way, embers in his chest that grew into a flame, which spreads through his entirety burning all. A blissful pain sits at the core of him, aching, he longs for you but do you long for him? Is he but a fool to fall in love with a stranger, the stranger in the lavender fields. Is he a fool for falling in love with you? Is this even love? His eyes fixated on your lips, he examines the curve of them, the colour, their beauty. As if they were magnets he’s drawn to them, slowly inching himself forward, so close he could feel the warm air that made it past them.
So close and yet so far is he to you, the sweet smell of lavenders is dizzying, the sunlight burns your skin but against Jisung’s it only illuminates his, he glows. The urge to place your lips on top of his, eats away at your skin, the want crawls under and down your spine, shivers resonate throughout your body as he nears. The world falls away, the slight buzzing of bees fade, the tickles of the grass dissipate and you only feel Jisung. His presence, the brush of his knee against yours and the warmth that radiates off him. Your heart stops, you stop breathing, anticipating what’s about to happen next until suddenly Jisung’s head snaps to the right and reality comes flooding in as you hear both your names ringing and ripping through the air. “Jisung! Y/N!” Daphne shouts and Jisung jumps up answering for both of you “We’re coming!” Left completely stunned you sit there, mind in chaos as your embarrassment engulfs you. Your eyebrows furrowed, you think to yourself how you could allow for yourself to fall into his spell. What were you thinking? That’s the problem, around Jisung you can’t think, everything happens on pure instinct and desire. Then as if you had rewinded time, a shadow is casted over you, a hand is placed in front of you to take and as he did on that first day, he snaps you out of your daze. “Are you feeling well?” he asks in that same soft voice. Your hand twitches to move towards him and it takes everything in your power to stop it from falling into his grasp once again.
“Fine” it comes out much colder than you expected it to as you rise up to your feet on your own, his hand is left hanging awkwardly to which he slowly closes before placing it behind his head as he bites his bottom lip and your eyes can’t help but fall on them again, they which were so close and yet so far. “Let’s go” and this time you lead him out of the lavender field.
The walk back to the house is silent, the same awkwardness that hadn’t made an appearance in so long settles in the air, it’s thick and heavy and you can feel it weigh you down. Upon arriving back to the house, a carriage awaits outside, a military emblem on the back and your heart drops, eyes widen and your steps stop. “It couldn’t be” you let out at barely a whisper.
But the slightest sound from you is enough to have Jisung’s head snap up towards you, for he’s been waiting for you to make a sound, any sound to rid this atmosphere. "What is it?" He asks also hushed, his eyes follow yours and there it leads to the carriage, a smile rips through his face and he runs ahead.  Confused you rush your steps but the anxiety building up in your chest stays, the lump in your throat is still hard to swallow.
“Y/N!” Jaemin calls you whilst waving his hand eagerly, calling you to come quickly and as you step closer the constraining feeling in your chest dissipates as the figure that steps out of the carriage is an unknown one to you. You stand by Jaemin’s side, who radiates excitement off him and you can’t help but smile as the little boy in the picture is standing right before you, the same eager stance and pretty smile that even the sun envies. The man exists and immediately pulls Jeno into an embrace so tight and you swear you see Jeno’s eyes sparkle as tears threaten to fall. Jisung is much less subtle at concealing his tears, he sobs into the man’s shoulder and it’s only then you presume this is their father. Jisung’s eyes are red and he sniffles as his father let’s go of him and your heart clenches at his adorableness. Jaemin is as happy as ever, hugging his father as tight as ever, eyes closed in pure bliss. You’re smiling like a fool as the heartwarming scene unfolds in front of you, so busy looking at the happy smiles and the stray few tears that are still running down Jisung’s cheeks you don’t notice the new acquaintance step in front of you until he clears his throat and you jump to meet his gaze.
“You must be Y/N” he smiles extending his hand and you place yours in it, shaking it. “I’ve heard a lot about you in all my son’s letters” your eyes widen and your turn to the three boy, Jaemin with that damn smirk on his face, Jisung avoiding your eyes and as always finding his shoes much more interesting, thank god for Jeno who offers a comforting smile assuring it’s all good things. “Sir you’ve raised three fine men, who have all welcomed me” you bow your head in thanks and he smiles once again.
“I couldn’t possible take any credit for it, it’s all thanks to their mother and Daphne of course” he turns from you to her and she pulls him into an embrace “Thank you for looking after them” he says barely audible but Daphne catches it and just as softly replies “but of course”. As everyone heads inside you wait until Jisung is by your side to start heading in as well, “Crybaby” you whisper with a teasing smile you nudge him with your elbow, he scoffs as he’s wiping his tear stained cheeks but he can’t help smile back at you.
Seated around the dining table, as always by Jaemin’s side and opposite Jisung, their father sits at the head of the table and more food than ever is being served tonight in celebration. You’re much more quiet tonight despite Jaemin continuously making sure you feel involved in the conversation, you’re eternally grateful for him. “So Y/N, why did you leave home?” their father asks so casually it almost goes unnoticed by the boys but Jisung almost chokes on his water, Jeno’s eyes widen and Jaemin almost immediately tries to shut down the conversation “Father” he gives him a pointed look, jaw clenched, eyebrows furrowed as he shakes his head.
“Jaemin, it's okay" you smile towards him, "freedom i suppose sir" you answer the question and Jisung's father squints his eyes, as he lets out a hum in acknowledgement of your answer. "Even after all your family has done for you?" He continues to question "you come from the family my late wife used to work under, am I correct?" And you simply nod "yes I do".
"The late General's daughter" he states "I wonder if he's turning in his grave at this moment" Jisung's grip on his silverware tightens and you notice his knuckles turn white and once again Jaemin's stare is begging his father to stop as Jeno looks over to see how affected you are by his cruel words. You don't falter though, you know what you've done can seem selfish but it was necessary "I'm sure he is" you laugh out "but he's always known I'm never one to listen" you continue to pick away at the food on your plate and you can feel all there gazes falls onto you, as you look up Jisung’s eye bore into yours as he mouths a soft “sorry” to you and you smile back at him shaking your head.
“I assume you’ve run from marriage” Jisung’s father starts up conversation again and you only nod as an answer “Are you against marriage?” he asks and it’s if he wants tears to fall from your eyes as he keeps pushing where he knows it’ll hurt. “Of course not but I would like to pursue a higher education or experience the world first” you explain, still keeping your calm.
“You think a woman is capable of doing such things?” he asks again and it’s this question that really makes your skin crawl and your jaw tighten. Questioning your methods of gaining freedom is one thing but looking down on all women and claiming them unable is one you can’t stand for. “I think we are very capable, I think the suffragettes have made that very clear and sir didn’t you work with the Weimar Government, they were the first government to allow women to vote I would think their initiative would have rubbed off on you” and he only smiles at your answer.
“I was stationed in Germany and worked under the Weimar Government up until their collapse, you’re correct” he begins to tell you “I have to tell you that I agree with your view, I’ve seen much that women are capable of doing” he says and your eyes widen at his words “I think what you did was brave and admirable, my three boys could learn from you, I hope you can lend Jisung some of your courage” he smiles at you and your jaw still hangs as does everyone else's around the table and as you look up to find pink hues invading Jisung’s cheeks once again, if you didn’t know any better you would have thought it were always like that regardless. You nod at their father before answering back “I think I’m the one who’s learning a lot form Jisung sir” and the shades of pink darken
The atmosphere had lightened again somewhat although the topic on war was not a light one at all, as their father expressed his worry about sending his three sons off to war and how in ruins the country would be again, worry sat in your chest. Jeno and Jaemin are strong all physically, emotionally and mentally but Jisung is the sweet boy who wouldn’t hurt a bee. “What do you think of the current situation of our country Y/N'' Jeno taking you out of your thoughts, you head snaps up to him “I think the war is unavoidable despite our economic stance, Germany has already invaded Czechoslovakia and it’s only time before they invade Poland meaning our involvement in the war is definite whether we want it or not'' the table falls silent as they process your words and it’s not until Jisung’s father begins to nod and expand on your thoughts but you zone out as you watch Jisung fiddle with the knotted lavenders you had gifted him and your lips can’t help but curve.
The next morning a book awaited you on your vanity, a scarlet red cover with gold print, you ran your fingers along. “Sonnets'' it read and as you flicked open to the first page, familiar handwriting appeared “A collection of my favourite - Jisung” a smile spread across your face as it usually did when your thoughts ran to Jisung. You sat down flicking to the first poem “Sonnet 18” a giggle escaped your mouth and like a schoolgirl already aware of the beauty Shakespear's arguably most famous sonnet holds, the giddy feeling of butterflies blooming caused your heartbeat to quicken and a heat to rise.
Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day?
Thou art more lovely and more temperate:
Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May,
And summer’s lease hath all too short a date:
Sometimes too hot the eye of heaven shines,
And too often is his gold complexion dimm’d:
Annotations surround the poem as Jisung highlights and picks out certain lines. The second line is underlined and next to it he writes “Though you are lovely, temperate is definitely up for debate” he teases and you scoff at his words. You read on and lines four and five are underlined and his annotation reads “The eye of heaven is you who shines gloriously throughout the day and yet too often you allow yourself to dim. Don’t.”
And every fair from fair sometimes declines,
By chance or natures changing course untrimm’d;
By thy eternal summer shall not fade,
Nor lose possession of that fair thou owest;
“You are my eternal summer, your beauty is one that isn’t possible to vanish, it’s infinite unlike summer which collapses in winter” you read on as lines nine and ten are underlined.
Nor shall Death brag thou wander’st in his shade,
When in eternal lines to time thou growest:
So long as men can breathe or eyes can see,
So long lives this and this gives life to thee.
The the final annotation as the last three lines are highlighted, Jisung says “Your beauty shall remain eternal so long as my heart beats, so long as i live and breathe, so long as my eyes can see your beauty, I only seem to think of you now as i read this poem and in this poem the memory of you shall live on” you heart beats erratically in your chest, you’re breathless as his words halt your breathing. Forgetting such simple acts as thinking and even breathing seem to be a regular side effect in the presence of Jisung, just the mere thought of him. Your palms grow sweaty, your heart clenches reading over the words again and again, you pinch yourself. For this moment, seems like nothing but a dream, your heads in the cloud, you're living in the heavens. The feeling is suffocating, your own throat is closing in on you, the pain in your chest spreads like wildfire, your whole body aches with admiration for him. Yet the constant question looms over your head, what does he really mean by this? Is his feeling the same as yours? Or is he portraying the beautiful friendship you both have built over the weeks? One thing is sure and it’s that you can’t ruin that, can’t let the heavy air seep in once again and weigh you down.
The days folded out as normal, Jisung’s presence still as overwhelming as ever but you couldn’t help but find serenity in it, he was soft spoken yet his silence speaks the loudest for him, his grace and beauty as  were one to be envied by all but you were nothing more than grateful for being able to witness it day after day, it were as if he had walked out of your dreams. The stolen glances, lingering stares as he smiled or laughed, he stole your heart and he wasn’t even aware it was his anyways. Sitting opposite him, you stare not caring if he or anyone catches you for your far past the point of holding any shame and allowing your eyes to do as they please.
"I have something to announce" Jeno suddenly speaks up, breaking the silence, all eyes turn to him and he audibly gulps. You’ve never seen him so nervous, fiddling with his silverware you almost mistook him for Jisung. He clears his voice before speaking, taking in a deep breath he prepares himself for the words that are about to leave him, “I am to marry” he says quickly waiting for a response, an outroar, a gasp and maybe a few tears but none of them come.
“About time don’t you think” Jaemin laughs out causing the rest of the table to release small giggles at Jeno’s expense, “You have been all giddy and heart eyes at that girl in the village since we were all but five- OW" Jaemin's face twists in pain, hands rushing to his shin as he's cut off by a harsh kick. Jisung and you burst into laughter not being able to hold it in any longer.
"And what are you two laughing at" Jeno punches at Jisung’s shoulder, immediately causing him to halt his laughter as he rubs his shoulder “Well brother, it’s not like it is a secret. Even Y/N knows” and you giggle again as Jisung enlightens Jeno on his obvious swooning.
“What?” Jeno’s eyes widen as he turns to you and you can’t help but laugh even more. “We visited the village and your eyes were stuck, Jeno you walked straight into Jisung” you burst out laughing as you recall the memory. Once the laughter, the teasing, the amount of huffs that leave Jeno quiet down your left with comfort, a bliss that you’ve never felt before, a smile that just won’t leave your face. It’s a beautiful feeling and you wish to memorise it for if numbness overtakes your body, you can relive this exact moment of the solace you found in those around this table.
“Is that three out of the four of us in love?” Jaemin smirks as he lifts his glass to his lips, looking around the table, Jeno scoffs at his words but confusion is written all over you and Jisung. Did Jaemin know that your heart only seems to beat for Jisung? How did he know? Who was the other person? Was it Jaemin or Jisung? If Jisung, who did he love? The questions ran through your mind in circles and it only spewed more questions to follow, your head was spinning stuck in the spiral of curiosity, but curiosity always killed the cat.
But cats have 8 other lives right? That is what you had decided later that night, sat beside Jisung on the stone wall, letting curiosity take over you - slightly. Your legs dangled, swinging them back and forth, whilst Jisung’s gaze was set on the crashing waves of purple as the moon pulled them back and forth; yours were stuck on him. The moonlight illuminated, captured his beauty in a way the sun couldn’t, it seemed the goddess of the moon saw greater beauty in Jisung than Apollo could ever begin to understand.
“I could not fail to realise that sonnet 23 was not amongst your favourite” your eyes darting out towards the fields as his turn to you, “It’s one of my favourites” you tell him.
“I’m sorry to disappoint but do you not think it’s a bit cliche” he laughs and your eyebrows shoot up in slight disbelief “and sonnet 18 is not” you scoff, finally meeting his eyes.
“Sonnet 18 is beautiful” he argues and he swings into you, nudging you slightly, rolling your eyes you nudge him back “Sonnet 23 is just as or dare I say more” and he smiles slightly, eyes turning back to the night sky, the clouds running over the moon and Jisung is left amongst the stars. “How so?” he dares to question.
“It is, for one, far more romantic” you begin “the thought of one loving you with so much passion, so unconditionally that it can not even be professed by words yet the love they feel is so strong they need an escape, to tell that person what they can not truly express fully, to let them show you how much they love you. To hear with eyes as Shakespear so beautifully put it” you nudge him again and he looks down at you, a smile as radiant as the sun,moon and stars combined graces you and again Jisung has stolen your heart in complete silence
“Yet what I love about Sonnet 18 is that it is not too romantic, that the love that Shakespear professes can be for a lover or a friend, he speaks of all the imperfections of summer yet still he loves it, he describes the person he loves as someone who defies all the imperfections for in his eyes they are perfect imperfections when it comes to them” he nudges you back with a slight giggle but you can’t return his happiness for you have been stung as his words seep into your mind.
“Oh for a friend” you whisper, he hears your words but not the sadness behind them as he continues with that bright smile “and that is why it was so perfect to give to you” his words are daggers to the heart, piercing through, it shatters and the fine pieces scatter throughout you and the sadness seeps through every fibre, cell and atom of your body.
“Are you feeling well?”he asks and worry sweeps the smile off his face as he finds the glossiness of your eyes, the slight redness as well as the unusual silence from you. “Fine” you answer jumping off the stone wall, “Just tired” you say looking out to the goddess of the moon one last time, unable to turn and look at the art she admired most. “Goodnight Jisung” you say as you turn back to the house, not sparing him a glance for he stole your heart and then broke it. 
Though that night your tears mixed with moonlight until Morpheus took you to dream and then the next morning tears mixed with sunlight as Apollo pulled his golden chariot, with swollen eyes and a throbbing head you promised this wouldn’t affect the beautiful friendship that had bloomed. Jisung may not love you the way you would like but he still loved you, as a friend. The mere thought of the word stung, another aching rippled through you and your bones quacked.
Many dusks and dawns had passed and since,you’ve managed to create some distance between you and Jisung but as once said distance makes the heart grow fonder and you curse whoever uttered such truth. For every stolen glance and accidental touch seemed to make your dormant heart beat with every intent of being heard as it rose to your throat, suffocating you.
Jeno’s upcoming wedding being the greatest of all excuses to run away from the burning presence of Jisung, for you would flee to the village with Daphne and pick out materials, help Jeno’s fiance pick flowers, handwrite invitations with Jeno and accompany Jaemin on whatever errands he had been sent to do. No one questioned how you decided to spend your time, other than of course Jaemin who couldn’t help but let his curiosity lead the words that spewed out of him, to which you told him he’d regret someday.
“Just tell me Y/N” he groans as he carries the large basket of apples “Why spend your time with me instead of Jisung” he continues to pursue the answers you deny him of.
“Maybe because, and I dare to say, I like your company more” you pinch his cheek and laugh at the pout that forms on his face “What answer are you looking for Jaems, what would you have me say?”
“I want you to say you are helplessly in love with my brother who is just as in love with you however both of you are too busy quoting literature that is up for interpretation rather than professing your feelings because you lack the courage to do so” you freeze at his words and he also comes to a halt, turning towards you his eyes, sympathetic “you both are as obvious as Jeno” he lets out a small laugh.
“He does not love me Jaemin” your voice stern as you try to convince one who believes in fairytales, your steps quicken and he chases after you “and how exactly do you know?” he questions, curiosity endless.
“He said so, he said he gifted me Sonnet 18 as a friend.” You scoff at the absurd word that causes so much pain and you say it with spite everytime.
“Like I said he lacks courage and as my father said you, Y/N, can help him gain it” he tells you, eyes wide with hope and you admire Jaemin for being a hopeless romantic and you only hope he meets someone who completely fulfills his ideology of love.
“I don’t think I possess such courage anymore” you break it to him for Jisung has broken your heart once, how can you have the courage to allow him the chance to do it again.
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Jeno’s wedding arrived much sooner than expected, as the weeks rushed past in much haste as the many busy bodies prepared for the beautiful evening and as hard as you tried to separate yourself from Jisung, the universe liked to disrupt those plans. To the place it all started, so close yet so far apart, you stood rows away from Jisung picking only the prettiest lavenders as per Jeno’s request. The air was thick and heavy despite the August breeze that ran through the fields, an unfamiliar heaviness sat between you two for even as strangers you were far more comfortable. Maybe it’s due to the curiosity you held back then, for the boy in the lavender field, beauty that wasn’t done justice by the word but now that you know him, adore him and are in love with him and now that your heart belongs to him but his not to yours. There’s a void left for the seeping awkwardness to fill, an uneasiness sat in your gut and every moment was excruciating to bare as your heart pains at every beat that belongs to him who does not seem to care.
“Lavenders wouldn’t be my first pick for a wedding” he speaks up first, the silence with you was something he wasn’t used to, you always made sure to replace it with continuous talking and contagious laughter and now that you weren’t, it didn’t feel right to him but you only nod in response not entertaining his thoughts any further. Jisung preferred silence, his thoughts more coherent, his emotions understandable, the silence was comfortable and not overwhelming but with you he couldn’t stand it, mind always wondering what you were thinking, what you were feeling, he needed to know. 
So he carries on speaking, “If it were up to me, Irises and carnations” he expects an interrogation, your endless curiosity asking why that would be his pick but it never comes. So he continues speaking, giving you the answer you didn’t ask for “Irises mean faith, fitting for a lifelong vow” he laughs as he looks over to you stoic expression, cutting off his soft laughter he again begins to speak “and carnation, white ones that symbolise-”
“Eternal love” you cut him off, turning to him, finally speaking yet your tone is monotonous and there is no emotion evident on your face. There’s slight fear in him and it rises, a lump forming in his throat that he can’t quite seem to swallow “Exactly” he choked out, voice strained.
You let out a breath that seemed to be weighing you down, you couldn’t let him continue talking about the meaning behind the flowers, your heart couldn’t take it for aching stops momentarily and instead it flutters and swoons across your chest but then reality hit and it shatters all over again, the pain shooting through your bloodstream.
“Are you feeling well?” he asks as he always does and you answer “Fine” as you always do, even though you both know it’s a lie but he doesn’t push any further as always. The longing feeling for you to look at him and spill all your worries and feelings to him is so great but he doesn’t want to push you to nor does he expect you to trust him with that vulnerability when he himself does not have the courage to do the same back to you.
“I’m going to leave after Jeno’s wedding” you announce working up the little courage you have left, if you say it out loud then you’ll have to follow through. “Thank you for everything” you brace yourself to meet his eyes once more as you turn. “What? Why?” concern so evident in the way his voice wavers, eye glossed over as tears threaten to fall.
“I left to seek my own happiness in life, to make a mark on this Earth yet instead I ran from relying on my family to relying on you and yours” again your voice is completely void of emotions, yet every part of your body was screaming. Longing for the warmth, solace and peace you had found here and it’s at this point you curse yourself for memorising that bliss for all you will do is miss it.
“Did you not feel happiness here?” he screams out, harsher than he expected as he voice comes out rough and broken and you stand there eyes wide for this was the first time the pure,silent and serene boy that stands in the lavender fields has allowed so much emotion to course through his body and you can tell by the way he shakes, the way he struggles to breath and the shock that immediately washed over him upon hearing his own voice raised “I’m sorry” he mumbles in a heavy exhale.
“Thank you for everything Jisung” you offer him a smile as you leave, avoiding his question, leaving him standing alone in the lavender fields.
Leaving the basket of lavenders with Jeno, you rush up the stairs and only when behind the safety of your door do you allow the tears to come streaming down your face, sobs escaping and you hold your mouth to conceal them as you take deep shaky breaths to steady your breathing. Your whole body aches and shakes as it mours the end of your stay, the tears cloud your vision and as you lay down to ease the heartbeat in your head, you cry yourself into a slumber. Even as the dreams swirl around you, pulling you into the unconscious, reality never truly slips away, it haunts you as even in the world you build you can’t stray away from it. The ability to dream of anything further isn’t a possibility, he doesn’t love you and that’s the reality. Why bother dreaming of something that isn’t meant to be. Yet you can’t help but dream of him. His eyes, his smile, his warmth, the pink dust that always decorates his cheeks, his laugh and his existence.
In your days you are held hostage by the daydreams, the what ifs. It felt like you had loved him in every lifetime, you wonder if any had got it right? Had any been loved by him? Your body lies stiff, falling in and out of consciousness but your mind never leaves him. Days go by but time becomes nothing but a construct, eating only becomes a chore.
“Y/N?” a soft voice calls as the door narrows open, a steady stream of gold shining in. You don't move, your head feeling like it's weighed down but you can easily identify the soft voice that speaks. "I brought you something to eat" the footsteps near you, the heavy thuds vibrating through your head. Your eyes peek open to meet Jaemin who crouches down beside you. He moves the few stray strands of hair behind your ear, noticing the wet glimmer of your cheeks he wipes away the tears that stain them.
"What's wrong?" He whispers as if any harsher tone would break you, as if you weren't already broken. You shake your head as your only reply, voice too weak and broken to speak up. You would love to talk to Jaemin, to spill all your worries and heartache but this is a pain too painful to speak of. His hands hold onto your cheeks wiping away any of the stray tears that still fall. His warmth is comforting but it only makes you yearn for Jisung’s more.
Jaemin doesn't leave you that day, he sits by your side in silence. He holds your hand and wipes away your tears, he doesn't attempt to mend your heart, he just sits beside you as it cries out the pain. "It will heal, it will mend itself" he whispers to you as you drift off into the unconscious once again.
It’s the constant knocking at your door that drags you out of the depths of your slumber, pulling you back, the light that streams in as the sun is about to set and you wonder how long you have slept, what time it was and what day it is. Then another knock calls your attention from the window and Daphne steps in “Y/N” she says and her voice is high in surprise as she examines the puffy redness around your eyes. “I was expecting you to be already awake, it is almost time to head to the wedding” she chooses to ignore the wet stains on your silk pillow, choosing to bite her tongue. You choose not to answer her back afraid your voice was raspy and would break, you crawl towards the edge of the bed and swing your legs over as you make your way to the chair that neatly holds your gown for the night, the night that has finally arrived,your last night.
You can see her face change, each one expressing the internal turmoil within her as she questions whether or not to say something. “Just say it Daphne '' you sigh out in a weak smile as you change into the many layers that need to be placed under the gown.
“Ah well” she begins nervously as she fiddles with her loose strings of her apron, she stutters and stumbles over her words but you’ve been taught patience by Jisung as he’d do the same.You smile at the memory of him stuttering, blush across his cheeks as he got nervous causing him to stumble over his words more. You loved seeing him so flustered, loved seeing him progressively become so comfortable around you he never stuttered, became so confident and articulate it was as if he became another person but the same dust of pink never faded but the more you think of him the more it pains and your heart swells as it aches. “You see y/n” she finally spits out as if she had been wrestling the words “If this is your last night, would you not want to leave with a loving memory?” she asks nervously. 
“So it seems word has travelled” you let out a small laugh as you turn to her to pull the strings of your gown and as her hands move to tie knots she laughs as well “Nothing gets past me” and her nervousness visibly dissipates. No more words are exchanged as she helps you ready for tonight, no more words are needed as she sees you slip into the depths of your mind, thinking of what your next act is.
As she places the same pearl necklace you wore the day you came here around your neck, clasping it, she finally turns to leave and through the mirror you see her hesitate but she turns back around a smile across her face “It was a pleasure to meet you ma’am” she says with teary eyes “Y/N” you correct her as you rise quickly, wrapping your arms tightly around her and from the corner of your eye you see Jisung standing at the end of the hallway, witnessing the goodbye he run back down stairs. You saw the glossiness of his eyes and though you would love to leave as a happy memory, would he allow it?
You nervously make your way to the drawing room, there he sits in a black suit, his hair neatly styled yet it looks not much different to everyday. He should not look this good but he does because he is the epitome of beauty. He is beauty personified. You let out a deep breath before you step into his line of view, preparing yourself for whatever is to come next. “Jisung” you call softly but he refuses to look up at you, you can hear him sniffle and his breathing is heavy and you almost could trick yourself into believing he loved you the way you loved him. You sit beside him and take his hand in yours, rubbing small soothing circles by the knuckle of his thumb you attempt to speak, “I am leaving” you choke out,the words are stuck in your throat and he rips his hands away from yours, turning completely with his back towards you. You sigh once again, “Let’s me leave with good memory” you beg, voice small and shaky. This was not the y/n Jisung first met, not the y/n he knows now and definitely not the y/n he fell in love with for you were never one to speak so quietly, yet here you are broken. So he puts away his own selfishness to feel sadness, anger or whatever pulsing emotion that runs course throughout his body.
He turns back to you, eyes glossy and a pout on his lips as he raises a long string of black silk. “I cannot tie it” his voice breaks slightly and you can’t help but smile at his cuteness. You take the silk from his hand and wrap it against his neck, slowly weaving it in and out of itself, you form a knot. “Learn this from a book?” he teases and you can’t help but scoff and roll your eyes. Falling back to where you were with Jisung was never hard, falling in love with him all over again was never hard. “my father taught me” you say as you pull the silk slightly causing his head to jolt forward. A smile perks at his lips as he lets out air from his nose as a form of laughter and you don't realise the lack of space between you two until you feel it brush against your skin and you near closer, eyes drawn to his lips. Your breathing stops and your heart sporadically jumps around in your chest, beating louder than ever.
Jisung’s eyes are closed as he waits for your lips to be placed upon his but they never come and his eyes jump open at the sound of Jaemin’s voice, your warmth escaping him. So close and yet so far, his eyes land on you who’s now moved as far as possible from him. “Y/N, do you know how to tie a tie?” he walks in looking down at the balck silk he holds around his neck but he cuts himself off as his eyes rise to find you and Jisung awkwardly sitting beside each other. “Oh am I interrupting?” he asks in a chuckle as he raises an eyebrow and you shoot up onto your feet, making your way towards him “No not at all” you wave your arms as if it would convince Jaemin. You grab onto both ends of the silk strand, repeating the same movements as earlier and looking down at the silk you can practically feel Jaemin’s smile that beams from above. You weave the string in and out of itself and pull tight around his neck causing Jaemin’s head to pull back “OW '' he huffs out in a pout, you pat down his tie and with a smile as gleaming as his was a mere moments ago, you apologise. 
“Oh y/n you know how to tie a tie, thank god” Jeno rushes in with his father soon after him both holding the same black silk around their neck “Does nobody in this house know how to tie a tie” you laugh in disbelief. “Our mother used to do them,” Jeno whispers as your hands make their way up to form the same knot you’ve made twice already. He thanks you silently with a sweet smile, those crescent moons you adore showing up.You move on to their father, tying his tie neatly and much more carefully than the rest. “Thank you for everything, y/n” he bows his head to you and you whisper “It’s nothing” shyly. “It’s been a pleasure having you become a part of our family” he continues and his words are like a stake to your heart, the same aching reappearing as nothing fails to remind you of your departure.
“Thank you for welcoming me bu-t'' you're cut off instantly 
“no buts y/n, you are family” Jeno interrupts and if it was anyone else you don’t think those words would have held such meaning for Jeno is a silent lover, showing his affection through sweet smiles, concerned looks and kind gestures; he was never one for words of affirmation. So you smile, ignoring the tears that prick at your eyes, ignoring the deep breaths that leave Jisung and the solemn sadness on Jaemin’s face.
“We need to go” Jaemin looks down at his pocket watch, as always sensing the tension in the room and ready to dissipate it, he urges everyone out the door and as you’re about to step out, a warmth engulfs you as Jisung catches your hand in his. Turning back you are met with a smile but it doesn’t quite reach his eyes that hold a sense of sadness as they glimmer in the setting sun.
Hours after the sun had sunk into the horizon, the moon well into its reign, music rang through the center of town as everyone gathered to celebrate the new chapter of Jeno’s life. A ceremony so beautiful, you were sure you witnessed true love when Jeno’s eyes set on his bride that walked the altar.
After all the tears, it was finally time for the bubbling of champagne to intoxicate your bloodstream and to allow the music to take control of every swayed movement of your body. Standing under the yellow dimmed lights, Jisung glew a gold you didn’t know existed but easily was the prettiest you had ever seen. His cheekbones high and lips painted pink, golden flute in hand and silk tie loosened you could easily say he was the prettiest here, outshining all. For Aphrodite, the goddess of beauty lived through him, simple acts such as greeting guests left you stunned. Eyes chasing every movement of his, from the way his hands moved as he spoke, to the way he smiled once seeing an old friend, the way he laughed softly in conversation and when his eyes travelled back to you when he thought you weren't looking.
And to pull you out of that trance was none other than Jaemin, “Would you and Jisung stop exchanging lover eyes and dance already” he whispers as he places himself beside you, you scoff at his words and slightly nudge him with your elbow.
“Are you so bored that your eyes follow mine?” you question and his simple and instant “Yes” make your eyes roll as far as possible but you can’t help but smile. “When will you find your own love story? This is one hopeless”
“So when were you planning to tell me you were leaving after tonight” his words don’t come as a surprise, nothing goes past Jaemin but it still doesn’t fail to make your every movement halt as guilt overtakes you, turning to him you begin to explain “I was going to tell you as soon as the night was over, it was unexpected I promise” you say softly.
“I don’t suppose i can change your mind in any way?” he asks hopefully, still with the knowledge he wouldn’t be able to. You shake your head slowly, unable to say the words that will so obviously ruin the both of you but Jaemin is never one to sit in sadness, always being his priority to make you feel better. 
“Would you allow me this first dance?” he bows down asking for your hand and with that you place yours in his, placing a soft kiss to the knuckles he pulls you into the center of the floor. Legs moving to the beat, Jaemin’s hand on your waist he guides you through the waltz, breaths heaving and smiles plastered on your face he bends down once more to place a kiss on your knuckles as the music dies down declaring the end of the dance, a sad smile spreads across his face and he whispers “Goodbye” against your skin, looking up to meet your eyes who hold nothing but despair. Yet the hardest is to come when you turn and automatically your eyes find Jisungs, who just happened to be looking your way.
You offer him a smile before heading towards him “And why are you not dancing, I’m sure plenty of girls are just about dying to be your first dance” you tease him and he laughs along with you, hands rising they scratch the back of his neck as he prepares to confess to you “I actually do not know how to dance” he spits out fast hoping you don't catch his words but you do. Eyes widening and mouth agape, you let out a gasp 
“Jisung you do not know how to-” you're cut off by his hand on your mouth as he looks around to see if anyone has heard the sentence about to leave you. 
“Quietly, I think the whole of London can hear you” he says in a whisper still looking around. Removing his hand, you roll your eyes at his antics.
“Let me teach you” you whisper back and he turns to you, eyebrow raised as he assesses how good of a dancer you could be.
“I am not entirely sure, who did you learn from? A book?” he teases, still completely in character until you shove him and his laughter comes spilling out “You used the joke once already” you roll your eyes 
“I was taught by trainers actually, do you forget I was to be wed” you scoff at his assumption and rise to your feet, hand extended for Jisung to take. He stares at you, watches the way the light bounces off your skin causing you to glow, your eyes glimmer, smile bright and the confidence and charm you carry in inexplicably attractive as you stand under the moon, offering to be Jisung’s first dance and it’s here he decides you’ll be his last.
The moment his hand is in yours, you drag him straight to the crowd, the music is quick to start and you waste no time in giving out instructions. “Place your hand on my waist” you order
“Your what?” Jisung’s eyes are wide as he cluelessly asks
“My waist” you repeat again, emphasizing each word and you drag his hand up and place it on your waist for yourself. Then putting your own hand on his shoulder, you pull him a little closer. “Just follow my lead” you reassure him as you witness the petrified look on his face.
“Left foot forward” you say to him as you move yours back, “Right foot forward, feet together” you continue to guide him through the dance as you spin around the room, ‘Now left foot back, right foot back, now feet together” you repeat the sequined dance around the room, music thumping through your body and you convince yourself it’s that you feel and not the heavy beats of your heart as the space between you and Jisung seems to close more and more. As he leans in so close you can feel the air that leaves him, fanning over you. You look up and his eyes are set on you, only adoration is held in them and Jisung thinks it’s now or never as he tries to fully close the gap between you two, to place his lips on yours but then you let go, head turning to the right “Now we switch you” you say as you land into another man's arms, repeating the same steps you did with Jisung moments ago with another. So close and yet so far is all Jisung can think whilst his eyes watch you twirl about the room.
Once finally back in his arms, the music seizes and he’s forced to remove himself from you. You can’t help but smile at him as he looks down at you, breathing heavily with a flush of pink to his cheeks yet he seems to be gleaming in the buzzing sensation of a waltz. The air is heavy with sweat and alcohol, the room is filled with chatter and loud laughs but that all falls away once you look at Jisung. So you dance to every song as if you were the only two people to exist, for this was your last night and this was your last dance.
Endless glasses of champagne later your dancing feet carry you outside, the cool summer nights air washes over you, clearing your mind of the foggy mist of alcohol yet the coolness of the moonlight is overwhelmed by the warmth of Jisung’s presence as he stumbles next to you, tripping over his own legs he lands in your arms. “I think you drank a little too much” you laugh down at him.
“No I am perfectly fine” He quickly stabilizes himself, straightening out his clothes and you can only smile as he shakes off your support. “If you say so” you turn to the night sky, looking up to the moon who you haven't had the courage to face since. The wind rushing past you, crickets croaking and the stars blazing across the sky, your legs about to give way as the alcohol circulates your body, you find purchase on a stone bridge, Jisung following soon after you. The water trickles down under you, the calming sound washes over you and the solace you so missed seems to make an appearance once again as you allow yourself to surrender to Jisung’s presence. Silence sits between the two of you but it’s not the one you wish to fill, insead you choose to let it engulf you not wanting words to taint this moment. Your last moment.
Jisung however doesn’t think he can hold it in anymore, the liquid courage is just about enough for him to declare his roaring love for you, a flame that won’t go out no matter how far he pushes the idea of you away. He wasn’t sure if this was love but the ache in his chest all these days proved it could be nothing but love. The longing to be by your side as you found happiness, found your own way into this world and to watch you become who you want, is unbearably strong. This is his only chance before the goddess of the moon takes you away with her, for when the sun rises, you'll set into nothing but a memory. So here Jisung turns to you, staring at your beautifully carved features, moonlight highlighting every perfection; deep breaths he calms his nerves. Adrenaline rushing through every nerve, he finally builds the courage and out the words he never knew would feel so good to pronounce “Y/N I love you” it comes out in a whisper but by the way your eyes widen, breathing halts, Jisung knows you’ve heard.
“Jisung you are drunk” you laugh off
“Drunk lies are sober truths” he says in all seriousness, his eyes are begging for yours to turn to him and so you give in to their silent cry. “I’ve loved you from the moment I met you, for I thought soulmates were nothing but a fairytale until mine spoke to me upon laying eyes on you. I denied my feelings towards you, for I didn’t know if it was love I felt for you or not but I do. Love, adoration, affection and warmth. The moon only looks beautiful with you under it, the sun only shines with you beside me.” he professes and the sincerity in his voice strucks you, for every fiber of your being longs for these exact words but can you believe him?
He inches closer, his scent and warmth trapping you in a trance and you can’t find it in yourself to back away as he moves towards your lips, his breath mixing with your own, the flush off his cheeks that are illuminated by the moonlight. Everything is perfect except he’s drunk. Though your heart screams for you to close the gap, place your lips on his and kiss him until he’s breathless, your head scream the opposite, move back, wait till the morning when his head is in the right place, don’t allow him to make a mistake that’ll hurt you and when were you ever one to not listen to your mind. “You are drunk”  you whisper to him, so close he can almost feel your lips move against his, flinching back, ignoring the cry of your heart that desires nothing more than to feel Jisung’s confession. Jisung’s eyes open to find you pulled away, for once again he was so close yet so far.
“We should return” you jump up, step fastening back to the crowds of people who were still dancing and laughing. Jisung’s hurried footsteps rush beside you, his hand holding onto your wrist, he pulls you into him. Arms wrapping around you so tight, he’s afraid you’ll pull away and that he’ll lose you. You already pulled away from him once, you’re not sure you have the power in you to do it a second; so you let him hold you. His face hidden into the crook of your neck, he speaks into your skin 
“Love for you fades the exhausting hours till Kingdom come, for even then my soul only speaks of you, my heart only beats for you. Let me love and let me give, for both are infinite” he confesses once again.
Your arms instantly wrap around his figure, you allow your love to course through your body to his, you hope he can feel your heartbeat, the steady pace that keeps you alive for his existence, and him only. For without him what was the purpose of living? You stand there under the moonlight, red strings wrapped around you, Eros’s arrow shot through you, and hold onto each other.
Walking back, hand in hand, smiling like fools. The air smells sweeter, the world seems brighter as your heart skips a beat every now and then “In all honesty” Jisung breaks the blissful silence, his voice deep and smooth and it sends shivers down and through you just as it did the first day. Once your eyes are on him, giving him your undivided attention he continues “I lacked the courage to gift you Sonnet 23 but I wanted to” he tells you “Promise” he makes sure you believe his words and you can’t help but smile.
“You still lack courage, this is the alcohol’s courage” you tease him, swinging your arms back and forth as you walk on. He giggles at your comment because he knows it’s true, if it wasn’t for the liquid courage he doesn’t think he would have been able to confess to you but he’s glad he has because if he hadn’t, would he ever get the chance to?
“So will you stay?” he asks, voice hopeful and eyes pleading as he pouts, in hope it would convince you but you didn’t need anymore convincing, for if you want to follow happiness and happiness just so happens to follow Jisung, who were you to seek for more elsewhere. “Perhaps” a smirk makes it way up your lips as you give him vague answers. “I will take that as a yes” he laughs out, holding onto your hand a little bit tighter, to ensure you really weren’t going anywhere.
Love is a complex feeling, one that causes an unbearable amount of pain; as if your chest had been slit open, heart pulled out and crushed. An aching pain resonates throughout your whole body, endless tears and you don’t think you can live to see another sunrise yet it’s euphoric in every way. From the tingling sensation at just the sight of your love, the shivers, the heat that takes over, the trance you left in as their words hypnotise you, the warmth of their presence and sweet scent. In Jisung you found peace,solace,serenity and love.
“Jaemin” Jisung calls out as he can just about make him out in the distance “Y/N said she has decided to stay” he shouts out like a child, excited he’s jumping up and down and you find yourself smiling and laughing again, for with Jisung it’s the only thing you seem to be able to do. Yet as you draw closer to Jaemin and the guests he happens to be wishing a farewell too, your smile and heart both drop.
“Y/N” one of the two men calls out as your figure becomes more apparent to them, disbelief held in their voice as they call out to you. Jisung and Jaemin eyebrows shot up in shock, eyes widening as they wonder how you are acquainted.
“How do you know our y/n?” Jaemin asks, always being the first one to dissolve the awkward silences, the men are taken aback clearly by the way their jaws hang slightly.
“She is our sister” the taller stutters out, your blood rushes cold as the words leave his lips, what would happen now? Would they allow you to just roam free? You thought for a second before you mentally scolded yourself, they would never allow that. They will force you back. “I am not returning” you spit out, not beating around the bush, you get straight to the point.
“But you must, mother is left worried" he tries to grab onto your wrist but you move back not allowing him to get a hold on you.
"Worried for me? Or that the season is almost finished?" You question him and guilt is evident in his eyes as your question takes him aback.
"Don't be silly" your younger brother tries to calm you, "we just want you home" he tries to convince you.
"I am perfectly fine on my own" you stand your ground even though you see the frustration in your older brother, creep closer and closer to the surface "I have no intention of returning" you continue to press forward.
"Do you not feel shame, what would father have to say?" He dares ask. Shame? The word linger in your head for you to wonder if your brother truly knows the definition of the word or were all those years at Oxford a waste. For how had this brought shame upon you or your father, how does a want for purpose,happiness and freedom lead to shame?
"For if father was alive, this problem wouldn't have occurred. He would have listened" you hissed, jaw tight as you teeth clenched and the words slipped out through the small cracks.
"How naive of you to think'' he laughs and finally latches onto your wrist, holding tightly he's prepared to drag you to the carriage until another holds you back. Jisung’s hand holds onto your arm, pulling you back, looking back you don’t think you have never seen such fierce eyes. A red you never thought you’d see engulf Jisung, he’s not prepared to let you go. "Let go" your brother's voice is stern as he clenches his jaw yet Jisung doesn't budge.
"Jisung this isn't our place" Jaemin whispers, defeat in his voice and he is right. What say do they have in this? If you don’t even have a choice, who are they to decide but then again you are certain a man’s opinion will most definitely be heard by your brother over your own anyday. “Let go of her,” Jisung threatened.
Your brother couldn’t help but scoff at his words “She belongs to me, I am her blood and she holds mine and my father’s name” his grip tightening around your wrist as he pulls you towards him once more, your eyebrows furrow and you wince in slight pain, Jaemin instinctively flinches forward before stopping himself, getting involved will just make it worse he reminds himself. You smile at him weakly in hopes it can put him at ease but as both your arms are being held hostage, both cuffs tightening as the seconds go by not one daring to back down.
“She doesn’t belong to anyone” Jisung spits back “She is free to do as she pleases and she chooses to stay here” he continuously argues in hope of changing his mind , yet what can he possibly do? Now that they have found you, what is left for you to do? They will not let you live on how you wish, they will not leave without you and even if they didn’t take you tonight, they will come back for you. It’ll only cause chaos, you will again become a burden on someone else. “You do not own her” he repeats.
The words you so despise form on your tongue and as you open your mouth to say them, Jisung’s eye beg you not to. He knows what's to come and even as every ounce of your being screams and cries as the words are spoken, you let them leave you regardless. “Let go Jisung” voice weak, shaking.
“But you said you would stay” his voice shaky, encased in sadness, his grip weakens but his hold stays, unable to let you go once he’s finally got you but you were always a dream to him, one that never seemed quite real and though you mixed with reality, almost coming true, he was but a fool to believe you could be his.
“I said maybe” your voice quiet, breaking a promise you didn’t make, breaking his heart and breaking yours that was just put back together.
“She said for you to let go” Your brother interrupts, a smirk on his face that Jaemin has a dying need to punch off but he retains himself. Jisung lets go of you hesitantly, his hand still lingering onto the skin of your forearm and you take in his touch one last time. He watches you leave, tears falling from his eyes for you were so close yet so far.
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The tears from that night, months ago, have yet still to dry for every living and breathing moment is lived in agony, longing turning into nothing but numbness as it engulfed your being and became you. Days and nights merged, smiles are a forgotten act for it felt awkward even attempting. The large manor is silent, it perfectly resembles the void in your chest. You live as a ghost, sleepless nights and empty days your mind always occupied with the thought of Jisung.
His eyes that held the universe, his warmth the sun envied, his smile were solace was found, his laughter that was contagious, voice that was soothing, beauty unmatched, the gods were both proud and envious of their greatest creation. The years went by and yet the image of his is as clear as ever, preserved in your memories, you live on in your dreams that can’t escape reality. So close and yet so far from each other.
You sit in the empty rooms, walls bare for the art never compared to Jisung’s beauty, you never found art that could express the definition of art as well as Jisung did. Each time looking at Jisung you found a new feature to adore, hidden beauties that appeared when the moonlight hit his skin, features highlighted by the golden rays of the sun. No art seemed to do that, no art seemed worthy of showcasing.
Your library remains empty, clearing it out of all books, you couldn't bear to look at one again. For everyone of them taunted you with the memory of him. The way he used to sit in the center of the room, arms sprawled out on the desk, his head so close to the paper as he would write. Your eyes would follow every one of his movements, so distracted you would forget about the heavy book in your hand. Yet now with a book in hand, your eyes search for distraction. Yearning to find him, to make the pink blush, that you so missed, appear as he couldn't take your stare any longer. The adrenaline of when his eyes suddenly come up to meet yours, the scrambling of his when you catched his stare. You missed it all.
“Shall I compare thee to a summer's day” the performer begins, as you sit around the large table for dinner. Your every movement halts as the words leave his mouth, your mind runs back to the lavender fields, into the small room at the back of the house, finding the scarlet red book. “Thou art more lovely and more temperate” he continues on but no you are not temperate. Your heart aches, your eyes sting and a wave of nausea over takes you. Your fist smash into the table, legs standing up, you push the heavy velvet chair back
“Stop!” you shout, voice hoarse and broken, you can’t help the tears that roll down your cheek. You can’t help the way your whole body shakes upon hearing those words, you can’t help but miss him. The whole room stares at you, a heavy silence settles, the only sounds are your whimpers as you sob in your palms, falling to your knees. Their eyes lingered, terrified. No one dared to speak to you first, let alone the events of the night. Afraid they would cause you to break down once more but they failed to see it was they, who stole happiness away from you, stole freedom and ripped your heart out of your chest. You wandered aimlessly through the many halls, staring out of windows you wanted the sun rise and fall, watched the goddess of the moon shine down on the earth yet neither held the beauty they did when Jisung was by your side.
Summer has come to find you once again, those who say time heals have never been broken. Time doesn’t heal. Time forgets, the world may move on but you do not, you cannot share the same ecstasy the birds sing, the happiness in summer flowers, For now you hate flowers, you hate how their beauty and meaning are only reminders of your longing.
“How about lavenders for the drawing room ma’am, I’m told they are your favourite” the maid asks, her mission to make you smile, to rid you of the constant tear stained cheeks; nothing but a failure is awaiting her. Just the mere thought of lavenders causes your skin to crawl, for nothing symbolises him more than the vibrant violet. Yet you turn to her, a weak smile and you nod because maybe the scent will help ease your heart and just maybe you’ll find serenity in them once more.
Though days were long, summer left in a hurry for now autumn was here once more. The leaves had already begun to brown and the vase filled with lavenders, which sat upon the grand piano, had wilted now - their scent and comfort decaying with them.
And soon followed the day, the world knew would soon be coming, had arrived upon us, September 1st 1939:
“we shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills; we shall never surrender.” you read Winston Churchill’s words in the papers, war has arrived. The heavy ring sits on your finger as you stare out the window reminiscing the day you were watching the carriage be prepared and though it is your two brothers and the Earl’s son leaving you can’t help but let your mind imagine Jeno,Jaemin and Jisung, For the war will take them further away from you, to barren land filled with death, guns pointed at them, bombs dropping at anytime. Though the war has imprisoned many,taken from others, you thank it’s timing for it has liberated you momentarily. The Earl’s son waved goodbye to you and though you raise your hand to send him off to a war you’re not sure he’ll return from, you have no intention of calling him your fiance whilst he is gone and if he returns you have no intention of calling him your husband. You pity him in that memory.
“Ma’am” a voice calls out to you, you don’t recognise who it is for every voice sounds the same but regardless it pulls you back to the world of the present for the war was already well into its sixth year. Though your body is here, your heart and soul never left Jisung for he had stolen that long ago. You turn to find a small envelope, blue like the ones that found you happiness. “To y/n'' the handwriting is familiar but to you all letters were painted the way Jisung’s hand did, for your eyes can simply not forget but it is what the letter contained that brought a soul into your lifeless shell.
As an unperfect actor on the stage
Who with his fear is put beside his part,
Sonnet 23 with annotations is what your eyes fall upon, the second line underlined it reads: “With great courage I put aside this fear to confess to you such words that I cannot express on my own.” Your hand runs over the lines, the smell of gunpowder but there is a scent that you so long for. The scent of lavender still lingers onto the parchment which ripples under your clutch. .
Or some fierce thing replete with too much rage,
Whose strength’s abundance weakens his own heart;
The next lines highlighted “For this feeling was just as strong as rage yet it was where I found peace, my heart weakened at the sight of you and from that moment onwards it belonged to you.” A smile naturally took over you, the flutter in your chest an ecstatic feeling you forgot.
So I for fear of trust forget to say
The perfect ceremony of love’s rite,
And in mine own love’s strength seem to decay,
O’ercharged with burden of mine own love’s might.
O, let my books be then the eloquence
And dumb presagers of my speaking breast,
Who plead for love and look for recompense
More than that tongue that more hath more expressed.
O, learn to read what silent love hath writ.
To hear with eyes belongs to love’s fine wit.
“Know that I cannot express the words my soul speaks, for we are worlds apart so allow the empty words of the English language, attempt to convey my love. Look not at my words only but at the way the fool I make in your presence for my mind is clouded with you, heart beats for you and soul yearns for you. For you are my sonnet 18 as a friend and sonnet 23 as a lover.” Tears fall unnoticed, for you hear his voice so clear in your head, for six years you waited for a single word from him and here he has gifted you a sonnet between lovers, so how could you possibly love someone else.
“Yours forever Jisung, the boy who waits in the lavender field”. You sob as you read those words, a fresh new wave of tears staining the parchment as the longing to be in his warmth and comfort is washed upon you as if it were that day you were forced away from him. Opening a wound that never could fully heal.
Waiting is a virtue of love, it proves your love, for it feels equivalent to death and yet you still wait but there is a point in time where you can wait no longer, where you must stop waiting and strive for love now. At this exact moment, it is time. For you are ready to give up the world to run to Jisung, to find the beauty in the moon once more, to find solace in the sweet smell of lavenders once more, to find the warmth of the sun once more, to find happiness once more. For happiness was the only reason worth living.
You're not sure how long you’ve been running, legs moving on their own, you don’t look back you’ve learnt never to look back, never return. As the metallic taste at the back of your throat rises, oxygen running thin and your legs almost collapse from exhaustion. It’s as if you jumped out of the past, gown torn at the train station, you’re left in rags but it’s different this time. For before you ran to find your happiness and now you run to where happiness lies. In a field of lavenders.
Every fiber of your being pulses with the need to see him, hear him, touch him. To feel his warmth once more, to have his voice send serenity through you, to see his eyes again and to smell the sweet scent that lingers around him. You’re not sure what souls are made of but whatever it is yours and his are the same. For your heart yearns for him, desperate, it aches every living second of everyday without him. For a life without love, is a life unlived.
The rows and rows of purple are in sight and there in the middle of it all stands him, waiting. Jisung doesn’t need to turn around to know who it is, he can tell by your footsteps, your breath, your scent and the sudden ease he feels. You are there. Yet he does anyways for the memory of you has haunted him for the past 6 years, on the battlefield, in the barracks, he would only see you, only hear you but he couldn’t touch you; for you were merely a dream mixing with reality.
But here you are standing in front of him, Your expensive dress torn up, now rags that wrapped around you with the bottom half missing. He smiles as nostalgia washes over him, was this real or were you just a fragmented memory. Was he simply remembering happier times, a time where you were in his grasp. “Jisung” you call out, voice soft and unsure, a hand reaching out for his own, to make sure what you saw in front of you wasn’t a hallucination, a cruel trick your mind played on you. Slowly a warmth overtook your hand, sparks sent through your skin and into your bloodstream and the beating of your heart returned. Tears formed but never fell because one of you needs to be strong, Jisung sobbed as he fell into your embrace, gripping onto you. “Never leave again” he chokes out, breathing heavy and uneven. “Promise me” he whispers into your hair.
Pulling him back to face you, his eyes are red and puffy yet they burn with passion, his cheeks stained with tears but the pink dust is always still there, you smile at him closing the gap and finally placing your lips on his. The taste of salty tears invade your mouth and your lips move against his and he kisses you back, placing his hand on your cheek he pulls you closer, thumb brushing over the top of your cheekbone. Your knees weaken and you grip at his shirt, desperately clinging to him as your knuckles turn white, as he kisses you with passion overflowing with each soft movement, sincere and full of the love he can't express through words. The scent of lavender is overwhelming and intoxicating, you press yourself against him. Your lungs burn as he kisses you breathless, sparks flying into your bloodstream and unbearable heat takes over whilst your lips move as one. Pulling away, chests heaving as you pull in as you regain all the oxygen you exchange, Jisung places his forehead on yours, his cheeks pink and in between breaths you whisper against his lips “I promise” and again he pulls you in, lips crashing on yours.
This is your first love, it may not be your last but it will be the one you remember most, for it taught you how to love, it taught you the struggles of love and it taught you to feel loved. In search of fulfillment and meaning, you weren't looking for love but it found you and soon after fulfillment and meaning came in the form of a boy in a lavender field.
© (jisungiest) 2021. All Rights Reserved.
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Hi! It's an au twilight question.
What if Edward and Bella did the nasty in early New moon. Then the party happens and the Cullens leave. Bella discovers she's pregnant with Renesmee. What do you think what would happen?
A very interesting question, anon. One that will go very interesting places, I'm sure.
That said, as usual, because I'm a completionist, we have to go through the "why no canon?" routine. Bear with me, I simply must.
Why Didn't Edward and Bella Do the Nasty Pre-Breaking Dawn?
For all that Edward is, for all his... questionable morals and sexual fixations, he does have a moral code he strictly holds himself to.
Edward is adamantly against having sex with Bella in terror of the very real possibility that he will murder her in the act. He's very clear about this, he didn't think he could do it, at all, and only his sheer desperation that Bella never be turned, his desire to marry Bella, as well as Alice's thumbs up convinced him to do it.
If Bella was a reasonable person then she would have agreed as well. Sex with Edward, while she's human, is a bad idea. However, Bella never really seems to clue in on what vampires even are so I think the Man of Steel on Woman of Kleenex aspect is lost on her.
Had Alice not given the green light, I imagine Edward would have gone back to the drawing board and ended up either here or here. Bella turning is the worst possible outcome and Edward will risk almost anything, even Bella's death, to see it avoided.
But that doesn't mean it's an action he takes lightly.
He suggests pimping Bella out to Jake before he suggests sleeping with her himself. For Edward, this is a last resort.
More, Edward is a man of his time.
Edward was from an upper class family and, more to the point, still holds himself to the standards of the society he knew when human (much to Bella's amusement).
Edward wistfully talks about courting Bella, how he would have courted her had he been a true man in the time period he was familiar with, and why marriage to him is so very important.
That Edward doesn't seek out the approval of Charlie, Bella's father, is a hilarious aside to me. Edward's all about chivalry until all those old society standards get in his way.
What do you mean a gentleman doesn't sneak into a lady's apartments in the middle of the night to watch her slumber unawares?!
Regardless, marriage is extremely important to Edward, especially in the context of sex.
Edward will absolutely not have sex with a woman who is not first his wife. He also will not marry a girl that society defines as underage, he will wait until Bella's legal and probably until she finishes her primary schooling.
This means Edward was never likely to have sex with her before graduation and certainly not before her eighteenth birthday.
Which, at the earliest, puts her past the New Moon birthday bash.
Edward and Bella Do the Do Anyway
But let's pretend they do it anyway.
I'd say the most likely scenario is after the birthday disaster. This is it, Edward knows he is leaving Bella forever, if he is truly noble then he will never see her again.
Certainly, he will never interact with her nor hold her in his arms. To Edward, this is essentially his last true night on Earth.
So rather than pull a partial D.E.N.N.I.S. system, Edward pulls the full D.E.N.N.I.S. system, he initiates the "I" he was previously missing, "Inspire Hope". Or, in this case, get laid for the first and only time in his life.
He sneaks in through her window. They make beautiful, passionate, tepid love so Edward does not crush her in the act, and as she sleeps blissfully in the aftermath he sneaks back out the window to never be seen again.
(It takes Bella a week to admit that Edward just hit and run. The Cullens aren't coming back.)
However, because Edward didn't actually point blank tell her what was happening, rather than hit her New Moon stage of depression, Bella's instead in denial.
The Cullens are coming back. What, Carlisle has a new job? No, that can't be right, they're coming back. Alice would never leave her without a word. Edward would never leave her without a word.
Jessica pats Bella on the back consolingly and is secretly glad that it's not her. She might have been dumped by Edward Cullen, but at least he didn't humiliate her the way he did Bella Swan.
Leaving without a single word, yikes.
Two weeks go by then Bella gets the flu.
In a single day, she's unable to keep down anything. Huh, that's weird. Very quickly, Bella has her tampon epiphany. Bella is not a virgin, she had sex with Edward, she's late, and she appears to have a baby bump.
Bella is carrying Edward's child.
There is no question of aborting the child. This is Edward's child, the only piece she has left of him, even without Renesmee's gift it's ride or die. Bella is delivering this child even if it kills her.
However, she has some immediate issues.
First, she's visibly pregnant, it's been only two weeks. That's not supposed to happen. More, Charlie is bound to notice sooner rather than later, Bella would like to avoid that, the stigma of teen pregnancy, as well as the inhuman complications that are sure to come along.
Second, there's inhuman complications. Bella can't just go to an OBGYN, not even a town over. She's carrying something half human, a doctor will poke around and find that out, and then Bella's blowing the secret.
Bella knows vaguely of the Volturi at this point, but not the severity of the law, it's more that she promised Edward she would never tell a soul.
Plus, a human doctor wouldn't be able to help anyway.
That leaves vampires.
Bella tries to call/email the Cullens. However, thanks to Edward, all their numbers are disconnected and all their emails no longer exist. Her "Alice, help, I'm pregannant" messages are sent to a void.
(Alice, meanwhile, thinks she's finally successful in blocking visions of Bella. At least Edward will be off her back. Without the cliff diving and Jake, Alice does not assume Bella has died/committed suicide.)
A brief internet survey also yields Bella no results, but it does get her a lot of vampire porn. Thanks internet.
Bella... starts to get worried.
She's getting more and more pregnant in a matter of days, Charlie is starting to notice that she can't keep anything down, and the Cullens aren't taking her phone calls.
Then, Bella has it, she remembers that weird baroque painting Carlisle had of him and those Italian vampire dudes: the Volturi. Conveniently named after the city they live in, Volterra, Italy.
Bella debates her options.
Edward told her that these are the guys who make sure that humans who know the secret disappear. Well, Bella is a human who knows the secret, that's bad. Also bad is that they eat people, Bella is a person.
On the other hand, Edward implied these guys are civilized and friends of Carlisle. That's... good? Bella isn't sure she's on good terms with the Cullens, given the whole abrupt leaving thing, but maybe they don't have to know that.
Bella debates with herself, tries to look up the Denali, and only finds the National Park. She has no idea where these guys even live, or what they even look like besides "blonde hot vampire", and she's short on time. Plus, they are close with the Cullens, so the Cullens probably did tell them "Ew, Bella, No Gross, Do Not Want".
Because the Cullens all hate her now.
Bella has some money saved up, and this is probably a one way trip, and if she doesn't go then... well, it's not looking good. Bella musters up her courage, tells Charlie some outrageous fib to explain why she's disappearing off the face of the planet, and books a flight to Rome, then Pisa, then a bus ride to Volterra.
Bella subsists completely on blue gateorade, this doesn't go well, and she vomits blue in the parking lot.
Regardless, she makes it, huzzah she is in Volterra. It's sunny out and there are no vampires. Bella wanders around the city and looks for the most vampire building she can find.
Luckily, she happens to be right, and it's the very central castle. Well done, Bella.
Bella walks in and spots a vampire. She also spots a receptionist, Bella is very confused. Never the less, Bella says the magic words, "I'm a... friend of Carlisle Cullen?"
Even though Bella doesn't have Aro's name (or any of the other Volturi for that matter), Carlisle's name does the trick. Anyone who works for Aro knows that name.
Color Aro intrigued, he will meet this pregnant woman! (Caius, meanwhile, votes that they eat her immediately out of spite.)
Well, Aro touches her hand and lo and behold she's scarily gifted. And she knows Carlisle, what a great day to be Aro.
Aro explains that everything's totally fine with her knowing the secret, it just means they have to turn her eventually, after she gives birth of course.
Bella stares at him numbly and wonders why Edward made this such a big deal if it was that easy.
Aro insists Bella start from the beginning, as in the very beginning of her life. This is weird, but Bella complies.
An hour later they get to the interesting part: Bella meets Carlisle (and Edward Cullen, Aro guesses). Aro gets to hear the whole, sordid, ridiculous tale of Bella and Edward's romance including the part where he fucked her and ran off into the night.
Aro is stunned.
He first apologizes for the Cullens behavior, they should absolutely not have abandoned her, and not turning her was completely irresponsible (what the hell was Carlisle thinking?)
He then gives the bad news, he... has never heard of anything like this.
You see, normal vampires don't have sex with humans. It isn't done.
Also, there's this thing called Immortal Children (Edward tell you about that, no? Well, he probably thought it wasn't relevant). That thing your carrying might not be a child capable of growth but an insatiable monster.
Or it could be the alien from Aliens.
There's no way to tell, really.
BUT NO NEED TO WORRY, BELLA, THEY WILL FIGURE THIS OUT.
Aro promises Bella his protection and a period of observation for the child. Bella's not sure she likes that observation part, but this seems like a pretty sweet deal otherwise.
As for what to do, well, Aro has to call in the foremost vampire medical expert. Sorry, Bella, but there's only one man for the job.
Aro sends out Demetri to find Carlisle.
Demetri shows up on Carlisle's doorstep, "Carlisle, old friend, Aro has need of you. Your son knocked up a human girl."
Carlisle blinks, blinks again, then does a thousand yard stare. My God.
Unfortunately, or perhaps fortunately, Edward is already on Victoria's tail. Carlisle tries to call him, to no avail, Edward isn't taking his phone calls.
Alice and Jasper are already on their trip to hunt down Alice's past. Plus, given the Volturi, they'd be unlikely to come anyway. Carlisle sends them a message.
Carlisle, Esme, Rosalie, and Emmett travel to Volterra to clean up Edward's mess.
And sure enough, there's Bella, very pregnant with a child that is very much not human. Carlisle dies inside, Rosalie's on a warpath that Edward would abandon his pregnant girlfriend to the point where the only place she could turn was human drinking vampires.
Rosalie takes it upon herself to leave Edward the world's angriest voice messages until he returns her phone calls.
Aro's delighted to see Carlisle again. Even if he does have a wife now. Also, Aro claims finders keepers for Bella, Carlisle's not happy about this and less happy that Aro points out that if Edward cared so much he wouldn't be absent right now, would he?
They figure out the blood drinking thing, Carlisle desperately raids a hospital to prevent Bella from being fed the leftovers of the Volturi victims. This likely doesn't work out for him.
At the last possible moment, Edward finally picks up his phone. He learns that all he's tried to accomplish failed spectacularly. Bella is pregnant with his demon child, is literally drinking blood, and is in Vampire HQ with the leader insisting she will be turned immediately after the C-section.
Edward races to Volterra and strides into the room demanding Bella be aborted and remain human.
Aro stares.
Carlisle awkwardly explains that Bella's too far along, it's too late now even if they wanted to, more she adamantly doesn't want to abort and never did.
As for Bella being human... Bella pipes in that she's cool on becoming the vampire part. Aro's a great guy. She then races to embrace Edward, he's come back, after all this time. And he's going to be a father, isn't that wonderful?
Edward loses his mind.
And because this is Edward, I have no idea what he'll do, only it'll be utter madness. This is my best guess.
To be a little more serious, he probably tries to abort the child anyway, he mercy kills Bella and the child, or Renesmee manages to get through to him.
Given canon, it's likely the latter. Bella is convinced that her and Edward's relationship is perfect.
Aro has no idea what to think of any of this.
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uvobreakmylegs · 3 years
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Hypnagogia
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Warnings: kidnapping, graphic depictions of violence, death
The years of harsh training that he had received since he was a child ensured that Illumi could never fall into a truly deep sleep. It was something all of the Zoldyck children had learned, to be aware of their surroundings even while resting. Falling asleep completely would leave him vulnerable to a potential attack. Vulnerability was weakness, and when one came from a family of assassins who were open about their occupation, one could not afford weakness; one needed to be ready for any potential enemies that were competent enough to get past the mountain gate and the host of butlers in their employ.
So even as Illumi slept with you curled up by his side in bed, there was still a part of him that was awake and taking note of everything.
The sound of your steady breathing.
The way the moving air made the curtains flutter against each other.
The noises of the wildlife that came alive at night in the woods beyond the mansion.
Even the distant sounds of the servants in the hallways as they worked through the night.
At one point you shifted in your sleep, turning over so that you faced him, your hand grasping the fabric of his nightshirt and resting on his chest. He tightened his grip around you, holding you close while still staying asleep.
Things were as they should be.
When you woke up some time later he didn't react. Nor did he react when you sat up, pulling away from him as you left the bed. This was unusual, but not unusual enough to rouse himself from sleep to confront you. You got upset when he demanded an explanation for your every action, even if he had good reason to do so.
Your reason for leaving the bed appeared to be an innocent one as he heard your soft footsteps make their way to the bathroom, the door slowly closing shut as you tried not to make a lot of noise.
Illumi continued to sleep while waiting patiently for you, anticipating the feeling of your warm body against his when you would return and fall asleep next to him again.
The sounds of the toilet flushing and the running water from the sink echoed against the porcelain surfaces in the bathroom. You would be back soon, and Illumi would be content to have you in his arms again.
He waited for you.
And waited.
…....
…. Something wasn't right.
That feeling woke him fully, his black eyes opening as he sat up in bed, looking towards the bathroom door. The light from the bathroom still shone beneath the door, but he could sense that you were no longer in there.
He had made his way over to the door in a matter of seconds, throwing it open to find exactly what he had been expecting: an empty bathroom and you nowhere in sight.
A small window near the ceiling caught his attention. It was wide open, and though it was a fairly high off of the tiled floor and the ground outside, it wouldn't have been impossible for you to have gotten out that way.
Illumi let out a small sigh as he turned and made his way to one of the side doors within his wing of the house that lead to the outside. No need to risk one of the butlers seeing him and then reporting this incident back to his parents. He had no desire for another lecture from his mother on training you “properly.”
You'd been doing so well recently, and you hadn't tried to escape in months. He had truly thought you had given up on the idea and that you had accepted your role as his wife.
Once he caught you it would be back to training again, and he would take however long he needed to drill it into you that there were no other options: you were his, and your place was here on Kukuroo Mountain.
The wildlife in the forest grew silent as he left the mansion and began his descent down the mountainside. It was easy to spot where nature had been disturbed: small branches that had snapped and clumps of dirt that had been kicked up leaving him a trail to follow. He couldn't help but muse on how the results of your training were showing through. Though the trail was there, it was less obvious than the ones you had left on your previous escape attempts. You were more aware of your surroundings and knew better on how to leave with virtually no trace behind. He would have been proud of you if not for the circumstances. Why couldn't you put these skills to use for the sake of him and his family?
He continued down the mountain, following your path. He had yet to come across you at all, and his brows furrowed the longer he continued. Your skills had grown since you had come here, but he knew from experience that you could not outrun him. He should have found you by now. So why hadn't he?
Had you somehow tricked him?
Did you make this path as a decoy while you attempted to leave down another side of the mountain?
It was certainly possible that you would have known you wouldn't be able to surpass him physically and had attempted to outwit him to buy yourself enough time. If this was the case, he would need to make sure that the lessons he taught after capturing you would stay with you so you would never try this again.
Illumi was about to head back up the mountain to see where he had gone wrong in following you when he noticed something in a particular patch of soft dirt. Multiple sets of footprints heading down the mountain, none of which could have belonged to you.
More tricks? Perhaps accomplices of yours? Or.....?
Illumi sprinted past, descending the mountain as he searched for you, still following the path that he now realized may not have been left by you. There were possibilities in his mind as to what had happened, but it was better now to ignore them and focus on finding you.
He was almost at the base of the mountain when he spotted something.
Three black-clad figures in one of the lower gardens, two women and a man. And there you were, unceremoniously slung over the man's shoulder as the three of them ran. It was clear you were unconscious.
The three sensed him then, stopping beneath a pristine gazebo as they turned to face him. The terror was evident in their stiff forms when their eyes landed on him. Getting caught wasn't something they had accounted for. Perhaps they would have gotten away if it had been literally anyone other than a member of the Zoldyck family hunting them down.
Your limbs hung limply as the man held you, only swaying lightly when he pulled out a sword and pointed it at Illumi, the women with him following suit.
All the while Illumi stood there, silently assessing the situation before he came to a conclusion.
“Were you trying to kidnap my wife?”
The three tensed at the question, their auras flaring as they anticipated an attack. Illumi remained relaxed, even cocking his head to the side slightly as he asked “am I correct?”
After a bit of hesitation, the man nodded.
Illumi couldn't help the smile that formed (which only served to put the intruders more on edge).
“That's a relief,” he said, sighing, “I was worried she was trying to get away again. I'm glad that wasn't the case this time.”
“You.... You're glad we tried to take her?” one of the women asked.
As quickly as it had come, the smile on Illumi's face faded away, his aura flaring and engulfing the three of them.
“Of course not,” he said, his tone far more grave now.
“The fact that people like you would even think of touching her is unacceptable.”
The intruders were skilled enough, and had enough sense to know that an attack from him was imminent. As Illumi burst forward, needles in hand, the man threw you to the woman at the back, yelling at her to run. The other woman was too slow in raising her sword to block Illumi's first strike and a needle entered her skull and burst out through the other side, lodging itself in the stone pillar of the gazebo as she fell to the ground dead.
The man fared only a bit better, managing to block the needle thrown at him and running forward to swing his sword in an attempt to take Illumi's head. It was easily dodged, and Illumi threw four more needles at him, three of which hit their marks and leaving the man to join his fallen companion.
The last one hadn't gotten far, the other two having only been able to buy her mere seconds before Illumi turned his attention to her. She was carrying you on her back, effectively using you as a body shield as you obscured her vitals. There were a few ways in which he could strike the needle through you to kill her and only leave you with minor damage, but he rejected them. These people weren't worth making you go through any sort of pain.
He sent six needles flying towards her legs, embedding themselves from the back of her knee down to her ankle with three on each leg and making her cry out as she fell forward. She lost her grip on you and you fell to the side of her, the terrain making you roll away slightly. The woman was still trying to fight, but her attempts to pull out any weapons she could use to throw at him were quashed when he threw two more of his needles, these one stabbing through her wrists. She cried out as the nen in his needles worked through her, intentionally causing her pain.
But at the moment she wasn't important. Illumi brought his attention back to you, walking to where you lay and kneeling to examine you. There was minimal damage to you, some scrapes along your arms and legs where the branches in the forest had brushed against you. The worst of it was at the base of you neck where a bruise was beginning to form, the size and shape of the mark a clear indicator that this was where they had hit you to knock you out. Aside from that, you appeared to be fine, and Illumi allowed himself another small smile as he picked up your fallen form and held you bridal style.
The woman was now attempting to crawl away, her hands and feet tearing up the grass of the garden while the needles impaired her movement. The last of the intruders was taken care of with a flick of his wrist and a needle in the back of her skull.
His walk back up to the family home was brisk, and instead of heading for the side door to his quarters as he had originally intended, he went towards the main entrance instead. Even from his current position he could sense the activity from the mansion; someone had noticed that something had been amiss and had raised the alarm. Better to go in through the front and order whatever servants were there to clean up the bodies he had left in the gardens. That way he could have you back in the safety of his room that much faster.
What he hadn't expected was to see Silva standing at the mansion's entrance, Tsubone and Amane standing a few feet behind him. Silva glanced down at your unconscious form in Illumi's arms, a single brow raising.
“What is it this time?” he asked as Illumi made his way inside.
“Nothing that was her fault.”
A look of mild surprise settled on his face as Illumi continued “intruders found their way up here and tried to make off with her.”
“Did you find out how they got in?”
“They weren't talking.”
“Hmm.”
Silva sounded as though he didn't believe Illumi on that last part, but he made no move to stop him as his eldest son walked back to his wing of the house. Even if Silva (rightfully) believed that Illumi had made no effort to get any information from the intruders, there was little to be done about it now.
“Tell mother that her favorite garden is largely intact,” Illumi called back.
His father made another noise of disapproval, but ultimately decided to drop the matter.
“Tsubone,” Illumi heard Silva say.
“Yes, master Silva.”
“Get those bodies off of my mountain.”
Illumi tuned out whatever words were said next. As far as he was concerned, the matter no longer involved him. His focus was now on you and your well-being. From looking over you earlier, he knew that physically, you'd be fine. The slight injuries you had received would be gone in no time, but he was going to keep you by his side as much as possible for the next few days. He would just need to make it clear that this time it wasn't being done as a punishment. As he had said to his father, you weren't at fault for anything that had happened tonight. The most that could be blamed on you was the fact that you had been captured so easily, but that was a fault that was also on him; that he somehow hadn't been able to sense the presence of those intruders when they snatched you from the bathroom. There was room for improvement for both of you, and Illumi was content to work towards that as long as you were by his side.
After closing the window in the bathroom and changing you into clean nightclothes, Illumi pulled you back under the covers with him, arranging you so your head was resting against his chest while he wrapped his arms around you again. He was sleeping again shortly after.
If anyone was to walk in on the two of you, they wouldn't have suspected that the events of the last hour had happened at all.
When you awoke next Illumi woke with you, and he watched as you reached for the back of your neck, lightly touching the tender spot where you'd been hit.
“I-Illumi?” you asked, trying to find his face in the dark.
“Yes?”
“Did.... Did something happen?”
“You don't remember?”
You shook your head.
“You were attacked by intruders who tried to take you from me,” Illumi explained, “I chased them down and took you back.”
“Ah. I see,” you said, resting your head back down on his chest. You didn't bother asking what had happened to the intruders; the answer was easy enough to figure out.
The conversation seemed as though it had ended, and Illumi was waiting for you to go back to sleep before he did so himself. Outside in the mansion, the activity he had sensed on his way back up had died down as well. Tonight's little disturbance had ended, and everyone was more than willing to move past it.
“Illumi?”
“Yes?”
“Thank you,” you said, “sorry for getting caught.”
Illumi's eyes widened slightly at your words. He wasn't sure what exactly he had expected from you, but it wasn't that.
“I would be a terrible husband if I abandoned my wife so easily.”
You hummed in response, closing your eyes as you settled yourself on top of him. Illumi watched silently, repeating your words in his head and mulling them over. Before you could go back to sleep again, he got your attention by speaking your name.
“Do you love me?” he asked when you looked back to him.
“...... Yeah.”
It had taken a few seconds too long for you to reply, and the answer itself was not wholly satisfying. He had been hoping for a straightforward “yes”. Certainly by now he had proved that he cared for you.
Nothing more was said between you two, and you finally fell back into your slumber. As Illumi fell back to sleep himself, he reminded himself that you had thanked him unprompted, and had even apologized for your shortcomings. The matter of you loving him was unsatisfactory, but something was going right for your relationship. It was merely something else that could be worked on when the morning came.
As you fell back into your deep sleep state, that part of Illumi that always stayed awake remained aware of everything about you. The sound of your breathing as it stayed in a steady pattern, the feel of your weight against him, and the way you would shift in your sleep, at times attempting to pull away from him. Every time that happened, he would pull you back to him. Even asleep, he would make sure to keep you by his side always.
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creepytoes88 · 3 years
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His cumslut
Letting Vinnie do basically whatever he wants tends to benefit me more then most people might think. My best friends are always saying I’m gonna regret letting him go to whatever party or anyone's house. They say he’s a hypocrite because he always has tabs on where I'm at and who I'm with honesty it does get annoying at times but he can't help that he has trust issues. I knew what I was getting into when I said yes to being his girlfriend he has had a bad past with every girlfriend he's had, all of them have cheated and every girl he got with outside of a relationship just uses him. He was very clear on how he feels about unnecessarily revealing clothes “Wear what you want but if I have to kill a guy tonight I'm punishing you when we get home.”
A very common phase he uses but that's the worst of it I don't mind telling him who I'm with or where I am, I never ask him where he is because because I know he won't go looking around anywhere else. I've explained this to them a thousand times “Well tell us why your so confident he won't cheat” I blush slightly and shrug “YOU DO THIS EVERYTIME” I look down “it’s personal” they look at each other and laugh “tell us you prude” I chuckle slightly “promise no Judgement or making fun of me!” they both hold out their pinkeys and nod “wellllll...I let him do whatever he wants-” kay laughs “Yea we know” I look down “i mean anything” I slowly look back up “what he says goes.... Don't wear clothes for the rest of the week.....suddenly I'm busy all week” they look at me dumbfounded “of course there are exceptions but I let him have complete control with the sexual side of the relationship.” I say with a small smile “and he's good at it too” they look at each other and look back at me before busting out in laughter, “no wonder your not worried...your his sex slave” I tilt my head Vinnie had never used that term with me, I grew up with Vinnie me and him went to school together we weren't close till middle school we decided in freshman that we would be best as friends. The second week him and I were in LA we went to a party and ended up hooking up I was a virgin, and I thought it was gonna ruin everything but to my surprise, we just kept getting more and more serious.
After 5 months of living in the sway house, we moved out into our little house, our sex life completely changed when we no longer had people living with us. Vinnie told me his sexual dreams of having me whenever he damn well pleased and having me wear things he likes. Vinnie makes jokes about it but in real life I'm only allowed to call him Vinnie if we're in public inside the house his name is Daddy and that alone. The first time we had a fight in the house I called him by his name and he simply picked me up threw me over the couch, he edged me for hours when he finally let me release the power of it made me faint for a minute scaring the the absolute shit out of Vinnie. ”Honestly your not wrong...he’s never called me that but I guess your kinda right” they are quite for a second so I look at them “what” they look at each other before kay takes a deep breath “are you happy though, Outside of the sex he not controlling or pushy?” I smile “oh he's perfect and so sweet to me honestly I'm more worried of hurting his feelings.” I feel my phone vibrant and then Vinnie’s ring tone I answer quickly wondering why he didn't face time me or text me “hey bab-” I hear him breathing deeply “whats wrong?” I ask with worry “I really need you to head home now baby I’ve had a very long day and I need to release some tension.”
I feel shivers go down my spine and I feel myself already starting to get wet I let out a fake sigh “alright Vinnie if it’s that important I’ll be home in 10 minutes” hoping the girls won’t think it’s about something dirty. Vinnie lets out a chuckle “they are still giving you shit about me?” I laugh “I’ll be home soon I love you” I hung up and give the girls an apologetic face “girls I’m-“ they laugh and stand up “it’s okay Y/n we don’t want him to throw a tantrum because your not naked when you get there” I gasp turning around seeing their playful faces “you guys are ridiculous.” We all laugh as we go separate ways, I get in my car rushing home I want to beat him to the house so I can keep the plan of being naked. The second I step in the house I start stripping and then as I’m about to pull my skirt off I hear a door slam. I gasp and rush upstairs flinging my clothes off just leaving them there. I hear the Door open then slam shut I jump on the bed quickly, I place my head and chest against the bed my ass in the air. I spread my legs as far as possible trying to calm my breathing my heart is basically beating out of my chest as I wait for him patiently.
Vinnie's POV
I pull in to the house and shut off the car taking a deep breath ”Vinnie it's not Y/n’s fault that Justin is a dumbass” I say to myself getting out of the car I slam the door releasing as much anger as possible before going in the house to my beautiful wife to be. I will marry this woman she's everything I've ever wanted or needed but now isn't the time for marriage or at least that's what I keep telling myself walking in to the house and slamming that door too I am already kinda feeling better I'm still fucking pissed but I'm not raging anymore I toss my keys into the bowl and take off my shoes seeing hers just tossed to the side unlike usual. I walking into the living room to see her shirt and bra on the floor I smirk and walk up to the stairs seeing her skirt and her panties along with her socks right outside the closed door. “Hello my love-” I walk in to see her bent over with her ass in the air, her beautiful flower on full display along with her cute little button. The sight takes my breath away I can see her arousal dripping down her legs “well aren't you just the prettiest view.”
I see her wiggle her squishy cheeks making me laugh a little “wanna give Daddy a little dance show princess?” I was kidding but my baby never disappoints she immediately started to shake her butt to an imaginary song I watch with my mouth open a little I truly didn't know she was capable of dancing that way. I watch in awe as she began to make her ass clap (as one does💀) I grunt as I feel my dick become impossibly hard I began to take my clothes off as I pull down my boxers. My cock slaps against my lower stomach making my stomach twist I grab ahold of it watching as large amounts of pre-cum slip out. I swiping my tip letting out a little grunt, I hear her call my name I look up at her to see her look at me from between her legs “can I help?” she asks as she bites her lip. I immediately let go and I feel another large amount of pre-cum drip down my staff again making me blush slightly no one makes me as horny as she does.
Y/n’s POV
I jump up from my spot I roll off the bed dropping to my knees in front of him I take both my hands and intertwine them with his big warm hands. First I lick up the line of pre-cum that's made its way to his balls all the way back to his tip before sinking down till he hit the back of my throat. Vinnie lets out a gasp rocking his hips against my face pushing the rest of his cock down my throat a gag comes out as a result but I continue to bob my head and suck I pull my head off taking a breath or two before opening back up and taking him all the way till my nose is pushed against his naval. The prickly hair tickling my nose I let out a small giggle “Oh fuck what was that” Vinnie moans above me and he grabs the back of my head by my hair in a fist “I'm gonna fuck your throat baby are you ready?” I nod my head best I can with his thick and long cock stuffed in my throat and blocking my airway. He pulls back till his tip is almost out before thrusting back in a popping and gagging sound come from my throat and my eyes rolls to the back of my head. I never thought I would get so much pleasure from giving a man head in my life but something about his taste and the feeling of him stuffing my throat that I just can't get enough of. Once I spent a whole day just sucking his dick he came in my mouth and down my throat too many times to count I had a little stomach bulge after and it kinda looked like a food baby. I remember Vinnie asked if that meant I was technically carrying his children now I smile slightly at the memory but I'm brought back to reality when I hear him calling my name “oh fuckfuckfuck” he pushes his cock as far down my throat as possible “Shit Y/n fuck baby!” shooting a long, and hot load down my throat I grab his hips gargling my throat around his cock making him jump and try to pull away as he continues to cum down my throat. He succeeded in pulling out and the last little bit of cum landing on my tongue “mmmm Daddy you taste so good” I say licking my lips I use my finger to the the rest off my chin and off his tummy I look in his eyes at I take the finger and put in my mouth moaning at the taste again. “Fuck Princess you enjoy that way to much don't you think?” he laughs as he lays down on the bed “my balls hurt” he laughs I crawl back on top of him kissing his cheeks and finally his lips “you taste so good though Daddy, I just can't get enough of you.” I run my hands threw his hair “give me like 10 minutes and ill make you feel so good baby” he says as he kissed my neck I sit beside him rubbing his god like body (somebody said something about licking his biceps in the comments as I kinda like that idea so enjoy)
I run my hands over his shoulders and down his arms admiring his gorgeous skin I feel the need to worship him show him just how much of a slave for him I am he doesn't need to tell me I'm his slave, I already know I am and I'm gonna show him. “Mmm Daddy let me worship you” I whine as I began to kiss his chest and shoulders I run my hands up and down his toned stomach I began to kitten lick his hard muscles sucking little hickeys while I'm at it. “Fuck Princess what did you say” I start to kiss and lick his abs my hands rubbing his hard thighs pulling away I say “when I was at lunch with the girls I finally told them the truth about why I trust you so much they called me your sex slave.” I stop and begin to leave hickeys all over his hips and sex lines his hard cock brushing my cheeks and chin “I thought about it and I agree and honestly I wouldn't have it any other way” I lean down kissing his lips “oh princess I'm gonna make you more then just my sex slave” I sinister smile runs across his face and gleam appears in his eyes “I'm gonna make you my cumslut and your gonna beg for my cum....well everywhere if I have it my way.” he says looking in my eyes I feel a blush run on my cheeks and an excited shiver run down my back “you know you'll have it your way Daddy that my job right?” I say with a cute smile tilting my head trying to look innocent Vinnie let's put a dark chuckle “I can't wait to ruin you and really turn you into my cumslut” he pulls me down before flipping us over so he's on top “you won't be able to think about anything else except the way it feels for me to cum in your beautiful body” that sentence sent a violent shiver down my spine, I just got on birth control a little over 2 weeks ago but we haven't had raw sex quite yet mostly because we wanted to be sure the birth control is in full effect before taking the chance. (let's pretend you can't get pregnant on birth control at all lmao) I guess now is better than never “please Daddy make me your cum slut” I whine hooking my leg around his hip running my hands threw his hair.
Vinnie’s POV
My poor little bunny had no idea what she was doing to me as far as she's concerned these are just words flying out of her mouth but to me they are her words of true love and true trust. She trusts me enough to control her body and soon her mind, once she falls into the state of a cumslut I know she won't be able to control her body or her mind hopefully she feels relaxed in that state. The last thing I would want is for her to have a bad experience with me being the one in charge. I push my head into her neck running my staff between her slick lips a small moan falls from her lips “thank you, baby, I won't disappoint you I promise.” I kiss her lips once more before grabbing ahold of both of her legs pushing my spongy tip into her entrance the feeling completely different from when I have a condom on I let out a low gasp. Goosebumps pop up on my skin and a shiver runs down my spine as I pull out a light popping noise is made “UGH FUCK YOUR SO TIGHT” I let out a loud moan throwing my head back. I look back down seeing my sweet girl looking back up at me with wide innocent eyes and her mouth slightly open her hands hold tight onto my shoulders without even thinking I push inside of her both of us moaning as her wet walls fluttering around my dick about sending me into orbit I quickly bottom out letting out a grunt using my free hand to move her hair out of her face “F-fuck Daddy please I want you to use me” I began to jackhammer into her feeling her wall pulse around me her loud moans filling my ears as I pick up her legs pushing them into her shoulders feeling myself go further inside of her “Da-DADDY” I chuckle “what baby is there something you want” she whines and grinds her hips into me making me go even further if that's possible. “Daddy please cum inside of me I wanna feel it” Her little body was shivering, I feel my balls tighten so I began to rapidly pound inside of her “OH YESSS IM CUMMMING” she yells out thrusting her hips up. I grunt pushing as far into her as I can releasing deep inside of her, I look down to see her tense and shivering “you ok bunny,” I ask slightly worried “i-so um I-please” I look at her slightly confused “what baby?” I say with a little laugh I see her open her eyes a little before spreading her legs again “more please.” she whines out I drop my mouth open at my cute little whiney mess “oh princess you have no clue what you just did”
I have other things coming but should I make a part 2 to this
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wallwriterstuff · 3 years
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The Good I Come Home To ||Leon S. Kennedy x Female!Reader|| Part 1
Warnings: Angsty, PTSD Leon being very jumpy and shell-shocked, mentions of sex. 
Words: 3318
Summary: Originally posted to my Archive of Our Own Account. 
Part 2 can be found here
Leon has kept it very casual with you for months, seemingly oblivious of the growing feelings you harbour. You have no idea just how badly it hurts him to leave you every time until he tries to cut you out of his life completely. You have other ideas. You just have to persuade Leon they're the right ones.
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Leon S. Kennedy was a complicated man in many respects, but it was easy to unravel all those complex layers if you started looking at his core values, his sense of purpose. To serve, to protect. Leon was built to be the bodyguard of humanity, the first line of defence between unimaginable horror and the things he loved. Every experience had moulded him into this hard shell of a man, so far from the one people used to know. It had been interesting, really, to see an old friend from the Police Academy approach him and see just how different they had turned out. They both had the eyes of experience anybody in the force acquired over time, but Leon’s were sterner, like an unbreakable stone as opposed to ice you could chip away at and eventually shatter. This old friend of his had a small-town job and apple pie life. He had the white picket fence and the wife who kissed him when he came home to freshly made dinner. His children were doing well at school.
Leon had listened like his life was a whole other world away. It was visible in his eyes, though he carefully kept it off his face, that the comparison between each man actually disturbed him. You hadn’t meant to see of course. It was pure coincidence you’d happened to be in the supermarket, walking down that same aisle. His old friend had hit the barricade you so often hit when you asked. You’d stopped questioning it after a few months of back and forth and the looming threat of losing him became a dark and unbearable burden.
“So er, heard about the huge explosion at Raccoon. Where’d they place you after that?”
“Nowhere. I work for the government now.”
“Oh damn. FBI?”
“Something like that.”
His job was the complicated topic. Classified and bad enough to put a certain brand of darkness behind his eyes when you asked, it was  best left untouched by your hands because it was hidden beneath the many layers of the man you’d only ever been allowed to scratch the surface of – literally and figuratively. Beyond his core values, the simplicity of Leon S. Kennedy lay in his needs. He was a flesh and blood man after all. He was guaranteed to need to eat, to do laundry, to shower, to relieve himself. These simple needs were what made him somewhat predictable to you. On his best days, when he text you days or hours before, you were almost guaranteed to be wined and dined. Okay so the wine and dine option was sometimes more like beer and take-out pizza but it was always paid for by him if you bought the alcohol.
When he was feeling a little less than okay, you’d get no outright statement of his desire to see you, but he’d hedge around the topic and wait for you to ask him, like he was afraid to be a nuisance. You’d only get this awkward and prompting behaviour from him an hour or two before he showed up which left you little time to prepare, but a quick shower was always on the cards. In his worst moments, he’d give no warning and simply show up at your house with smouldering eyes that demanded your attention and everything else you had to give him. God help you, you always gave him everything. As simple as his needs were, as his feelings on the matter appeared, yours were much more complicated. Leon S. Kennedy had made it clear from the start when he met you at the bar that fateful night, all chiselled jaw and playful eyes, that nothing serious was to come of this.
It had progressed to a proper agreement when you both seemed to just keep running into each other. You were free to date, if you so pleased, and he’d stop showing up. He’d be gone like dust in the wind, untraceable and impossible to bring back. You didn’t want that. Until the day either of you became tied down you had agreed you were exclusive. You sated each other only. It was hard to keep to that promise all the time when he was away for long periods, but you remained true to your word anyway, and that was how it had stayed for a solid eight months. Leon came back to a bed you kept free just for him and left in the morning like it was no more than a pit-stop on a long and winding road.
You suspected he wasn’t proud of it. You thought sometimes you could see something softer in his eyes, something that made you think he wished for something more than he was already giving you. There were moments his eyes lingered when he said goodbye, times his hands stayed on you a little longer than they usually did. On rare occasions, when he was just a bit too drunk after what you guessed was a bad job, you let him sleep it off with his arms around you and listened to the whimpers in his sleep with an aching heart. Leon consistently let you have his body, gave you the briefest glimpses at the big heart he held so carefully hidden away, but never once did he let you into his mind. As much as you loved being with him, you had never truly been with him at all. You’d never truly connected with him beyond anything physical. It pained you to know you never would. You cared for him too much. You saw the deep pain he carried with him everywhere, and you’d never be able to alleviate that load because he wouldn’t let you.
You had to pause the TV to be sure you’d actually heard anything at all, but when you heard the noise again it was stronger, bolder. Knocking. Glancing at the clock, you turned the TV off with a frown. There weren’t many people who would come knocking at this late hour, and you didn’t know if your heart was in it tonight to let him in when he would forever keep you out. As if on cue, when you opened the door to a dripping wet Leon, thunder rumbled and rattled the open window in the corridor of your apartment block. A small puddle of water had formed on the windowsill, dripping in as the harsh rain battered the glass. Leaving your door propped with the door stop you kept nearby for moments like these, you crossed to the window to close it and lock out the weather. You felt sullen enough without the storm clouds invading your house.
“Leon if you’re here to drink that’s okay but I’m not really up for-“ you cut yourself off, uncertain all of a sudden as to what it was he was here for. His needs were always so simple, the looks and actions associated with them something you had come to learn to recognise without much conscious thought. This was entirely new. Those piercing blue eyes were sullen, fighting between being as hard as sapphire and as soft as calm ocean waves. What was frightening was the depth of the ocean you saw. It was like staring into an abyss of torment. Red-ringed and with whisky on his breath, it didn’t take a genius to realise Leon had been crying and was in fairly bad shape. Hair soaked and plastered to his forehead, he stared at you through those horribly complex eyes, his mouth half open like he wanted to say something but couldn’t force the words out. He was pale, breaths even but heavy, like he had to physically remind himself to huff out each one.
Wordlessly, you took him by the hand. His skin was freezing to the touch and you guessed the faithful jacket had done little to keep the bitter cold from seeping into his exposed skin. Your theory was proven right when his cheeks were just as cold to the touch.
“I…” you thought he might say more but it was like watching a caveman learn to talk. There were only sounds, no words. He was usually very skilful with his tongue but tonight those talents were nowhere to be found. Pushing his jacket from his shoulders you hung it to dry over the back of your sofa, hoping the radiator would do its job and leave it toasty for him when he inevitably put it on to leave you again. You ignored the stinging in your chest at the thought. Leon didn’t need you to be petty right now. Truthfully, you were frightened. Leon’s carefully constructed composure had been shattered by something and you didn’t think you wanted to know what was strong enough to shatter this man’s rock hard exterior and cut him so deeply. He stood dumbly in your hallway, and you gently pushed him to the edge of the sofa to take off his shoes so they wouldn’t traipse water into your home.
“Shhh Leon, just come with me.” You coaxed him back onto socked feet, leading him down the hall to your bathroom.
“No…no Y/N I, I don’t…” he swallowed.
“Do you trust me Leon?” you asked him, keeping your voice gentle like you were cajoling a wild animal into eating from your palm. Leon nodded without question and you smiled slightly. “Then just follow for me now.” You kicked open your door and led him to the edge of the tub, grabbing a towel from the shelving units there and placing it on the sink.
“What are you doing?” he could barely speak above a whisper, looking confused and upset and lost all at once.
“I’m going to run you a nice hot bath before you catch your death. I don’t know how long you were in the rain for Leon but you’re frozen to the bone.” You said calmly, putting the plug in the tub and turning on the tap for the hot water. Leon didn’t answer, merely watched you with the eyes of a man so lost in trauma he couldn’t find his way back to the surface world and make sense of the happenings around him. While you waited for the water to turn steamy, you rubbed at his hair with the towel in your hand to dry it. You knew something was incredibly wrong when he let you mess it up like that. There were very few instances you were allowed to touch his hair and you had to always, always comb it back into place or suffer the consequences. Occasionally, you took a break to fill the tub with some of your prized bath oils. Lavender, camomile, jasmine, all your favourite scents from a beautiful kit a colleague had bought you as part of secret Santa last year.
He didn’t comment as the room filled with intoxicating, relaxing scents, nor when you checked the temperature again and told him he could get in when he was ready. He held the towel in both hands, staring at the cotton as if it might hold some answers.
“Thank you.” He mumbled. You nodded once.
“Have you eaten anything yet?” you asked him. He nodded once, but he didn’t meet your gaze. He was lying you were sure. “Okay. Take as long as you need in here, I’ll be about when you feel ready to see me alright?” you promised, leaning up to kiss his cheek softly. Your lips lingered a little too long, but Leon didn’t move away. He closed his eyes as if the contact was all he had wanted and more. As the door closed behind you you heard the soft, muffled sob he tried so hard to bury in the towel, and your heart broke a little more. Something had shattered Leon S. Kennedy and it didn’t sit well with you at all to see him this vulnerable. He needed the space right now to get his mind back in order but once he did, when he was ready to face you, you weren’t sure you’d get an explanation from him. He’d shut down every time you’d ever asked for one before.
He’d woken screaming one night, lashing out so violently that if you had been sat upright there’d have been no way to avoid his fist and he’d have knocked you out cold. When you tried to ask what was wrong, he’d simply snapped at you to leave him be and left your apartment so fast there could have been a fire under his ass. So, what did you do? Did you just not even try? He hadn’t made a move on you, had specifically said no when he saw you heading in the direction of the bedroom. But if he wasn’t here for sex what was he here for? It only added to your anxiety that you really had no clue what he wanted if it wasn’t your body he’d come for, and though part of you thought that should make you angry, another part of you hoped that that meant it was something more that he was after this time. The kind of more you wanted.
No. You had to try for him. You couldn’t let him go on like this. He didn’t have to fight the war in his head alone, not when you were here. At least, if he wanted to go it alone, he could have someone stable waiting with a safety net if he stumbled. For now you’d let him linger and soak in the tub, and you’d make the most out of the ingredients you had in the fridge. If he stayed, he could eat it off a plate. If he didn’t…well, you’d make some in a container in case. Pasta bake had always been your father’s speciality and it had been your favourite as a child, was still your comfort food now. Chicken and bacon sizzled, pasta boiled, and you grated the cheese to the rhythm of your favourite song playing softly on the radio while the milk and butter warmed on the stove. You snagged a piece of bacon from the wok and let the salty flavour burn your tongue.
With your masterpiece constructed and more cheese grated on top, you slid the dish into the oven for it to crisp up and set your timer, setting about washing the utensils next. It kept your hands busy, kept your mind from wandering too much, but even the sudsy water couldn’t quite keep your mind from ticking over. Why had Leon come here in the pouring rain? What had spooked him so badly he’d thought, in his less than coherent state, that he needed to be here in your apartment? Did the fact he’d come to you mean anything at all or did he just happen to be nearby? You put the saucepan a little harder than necessary into the rack when it slipped from your hands, jumping and cursing to yourself at the loud clang it had made.
“Y/N!” Leon almost roared your name in pure, abject terror. Eyes wide you rushed for the bathroom, hands still soapy and dripping water. He was already out of the bathtub, naked and scrambling through his jacket until he came up with a gun of all things, aimed right at you as you burst through the door. A shriek escaped you and you immediately dropped to the floor, hands above your head.
“Leon it’s me!” you begged. Harsh breathing filled the room.
“Where is it?” he demanded. You peeked up at him from below your arms, lowering them slowly. He was half-crouched, eyes wild and fixated on the door that led back to your room. He offered you a hand. “Come on, get up and get behind me, where is it?” he repeated the question more firmly now.
“Where’s what? Leon I – there’s only us here. I just dropped a saucepan.” You breathed. His expression faltered, confusion flooding his features first , then guilt, and finally grief. His eyes closed and he inhaled deeply, held it, exhaled slowly. He lowered his gun after a few more deep breaths.
“I’m sorry.” He said, looking a little like a kicked puppy. You shook your head, slowly pushing to your feet so as not to startle him. His skin was tinged pink, little suds clinging to the ends of his hair. The timer went off in the kitchen and Leon flinched again, hand tensing around the gun. You soothingly placed your hand on his arm.
“It’s just the timer. We’re the only people here Leon, nothing’s going to hurt us. How’s about you dry off and come have something to eat?” you suggested. He blanched at the mention of food and you frowned. “You don’t have to eat everything, just a little bit, you look really pale.” You reached for the towel and held it out to him until he reluctantly nodded and wrapped it around his waist. You left the door slightly ajar and headed for the kitchen to switch off the damn timer. He was so jumpy, so eager to jump to your defence. You plated up a small portion, not wanting to put him off with a large one. You didn’t feel particularly hungry yourself but you’d had a proper meal earlier in the evening, a cup of tea would suffice, camomile and honey would soothe your nerves. Leon had a liking for peppermint you knew. Maybe if he was nauseous that would help him eat? Tea and pasta bake served you sat opposite his place, one hand wrapped around the handle of your mug and the other pulled up to your mouth, your teeth nibbling the side of your nail.
“You’ll make your thumb sore.” He lingered in the doorway like he wasn’t sure if he should sit down or run away. You dropped your hand and placed a more welcoming smile on your lips, nodding to the plate.
“Chicken and bacon pasta bake. It’s good.” You invited. Hesitantly, Leon shuffled to the chair and sat down. You didn’t push him to talk. Months of being with Leon had assured you that pushing would only clam him up further, and you wanted to pry him open tonight. With a sinking feeling, you realised it might be the last night you ever saw him. He’d let himself be extremely vulnerable to you already and you weren’t the type of person to see this kind of trauma and let it go unchecked. You’d want to check in on him, you’d want to help him feel better, and Leon didn’t appreciate the questions you’d have to ask to get the kind of help he needed right. He sighed slightly, picking up the fork and taking a small bite. He looked physically sick for the first few mouthfuls, and you made an effort to distract him with small talk about the weather, your day and all its mundane happenings.
He seemed enraptured by your very voice, soaking in every syllable that crossed your lips and mindlessly working his arm and mouth to clear the plate and drain the mug in front of him.
“Can I have a bit more? It’s really good.” He surprised you with his request but you obliged him, spooning some more on his plate.
“If you’re that partial to it you can take some home to.” You said simply. He nodded once, clearing the second portion with ease and looking much better for it. The colour had returned to his cheeks and he looked a little more put together than before. You settled back in your chair, watched him clean his plate and put it in the drying rack. It was a courtesy you’d never have asked for but were grateful for nonetheless. He didn’t turn around though, keeping his back to you and tightening his grip on the countertop.
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miamlfy · 3 years
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Finally
A/N: After nearly three months of not posting, I finally completed a fic. Feel free to give me feedback on this and just know my inbox is always open.
Pairing: Sirius Black x Fem!Reader
Summary: Sirius finally gives you the ring he promised you two years ago.
Warnings: THIS IS A PART TWO TO FUTURE TALK - read part one before this one! Mentions of death and most likely mistakes I missed
Word Count: 1,1k
Masterlist
Enjoy!
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(Not my gif, credit to whoever made it)
Two years have passed since the war ended. None of you thought to see the day when you could safely leave your house without having the sickly thought of being followed. Although it felt nice to no longer be at risk, most of the order was gone. A lot of lives were taken in order for war to end. The deaths of Marlene and Dorcas hit you the hardest, and you only wished they could once again live their lives unafraid.
Sirius also wished the same for his kid brother, Regulus. He felt so proud of him when it became known that it was Regulus who betrayed Voldemort and helped destroy him but that didn’t stop Sirius from feeling guilty, he left Regulus alone when he should have been there protecting him from the evil world.
James and Lily were finally safe to come out of hiding, and Remus could finally spend another full moon with his friends altogether. It became known that Peter was working alongside Voldemort, however he was still a part of your family and the five of you began to work on forgiving and trusting him again.
Since that night you and Sirius spoke about your futures together, Sirius has been waiting for the perfect time to go ring shopping and pick out the perfect one for you. He only hoped that you didn’t forget about that night and that your engagement, if he could call it that was still on. He just waited on the perfect day to go to the jewelry store.
Thankfully distracting you wasn’t a difficult task as you took up the duty on renovating the Grimmauld Place during the weekends with the help of Kreacher—somehow the house elf took a liking for you. The only issue now was trying to get James to go with him, ever since Lily became pregnant with their second child James has become clingier then ever and demands to be at his wife’s side 24/7.
“C’mon James, this is a special moment for me, and I need you, as my future best man, to accompany me!” Sirius pleaded.
James stood for a moment thinking with a finger over his lips. “No.” He said. Sirius let out a frustrated sigh.
“I went with you! Why won’t you come with me?”
“Because Sirius, what if Lily needs something and she can’t get it or what if Harry gets into something he isn’t supposed to get into?” James proceeded to look over to his three-year-old who was inches away from pulling their cat’s tail. James ran to move Harry away and placed him on his hip.
“James if you don’t come with me, I won’t visit you for a week and I’ll take Harry with me!” Sirius said in a semi threatening tone.
“You wouldn’t?!”
“Oh, I would, without hesitation James. Without hesitation.” Sirius began taking Harry out of his father’s arms, making James grip his son slightly tighter.
“Fine, I’ll go…if Lily gives me permission.” Sirius rolled his eyes as James ran to where Lily was.
Convincing Lily only took three seconds, which wasn’t very surprising considering she would complain to you on how annoying James was becoming and she needed a break from him. James and Sirius were now entering their fifth jewelry store, Sirius was having the hardest time finding the perfect ring for you.
Sirius was extremely close into taking home an Emerald ring with a silver band until James said it looked too Slytherin. However, James was becoming incredibly picky with any ring Sirius was close to buying.
“James, I hope you know this ring is for Y/n and not for you.” Sirius said slightly annoyed.
After visiting three more stores, Sirius and James both found a ring that they would both agree on. The ring would perfectly match your skin tone along with the stone. The next step on his plan was to figure out a good way to propose to you.
Sirius spent at least two weeks coming up with ideas, but nothing seemed good enough until he remembered the exact words, he said to you two years prior.
“I want you to marry me after this god-awful war, I want to marry you and I want to have children with you. I want the happiness, the love, the joy, the tears, and even the sadness and anger. I want it all with you. Take this as a proposal or whatever but I want to marry you after all this.”
Sirius thought to himself if it was a good idea to do it this way, but he promised you a ring and he’s going to give you said ring. Stuffing the ring into this jacket, he apparated to where you were as you were starting to spend more days renovating the once horrid house.
Entering the house, he noticed the walls were freshly painted and furniture that was more up to date. Hearing your softs singing coming the kitchen, Sirius ran down the hallway ignoring Kreacher’s comments towards him running in the house.
He stood by the entrance for a few seconds, admiring you as you were in your own world painting the cabinets. Taking out the ring box from his jacket, he opened it looking at the ring once more before placing it front of you.
Slightly confused at what was blocking your view, you pushed Sirius’ hand back to have a clear look at what he was trying to show you.
“Sirius what is this?” You asked, still staring at the ring.
“It’s the ring I promised you, my love.” He spoke softly. You felt your heart start to pound at his words. “Two weeks ago, I went out to buy it with Prongs just how I said I would.”
Tears began to fill your eyes as you turned around to face him, you honestly didn’t think he remembered since none of those thoughts were never spoken about since that night.
“I want to continue being with you for the rest of my life, you’re already working on our future home and it’s only fair that we live in it as a married couple. So, will you ma— “
“Sirius just put the damn ring on me already! Of course, I’ll marry you!” You said excitedly, cutting him off.
Sirius laughed as he took the ring out of the box and placed it on your finger. You held your left hand up, admiring the beautiful ring he chose for you.
“It’s perfect darling. I love you and can’t wait for what the future brings us” You said, kissing him afterwards.
“I love you too and I can’t wait either.” Sirius and you held each other tightly, not wanting the moment to end.
“We’re still naming our future kid Elvendork, right?” You said, breaking the silence.
“For Merlin’s sake Y/n, when are you letting the name go?”
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saturnsummer · 3 years
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flutter and kicks
notes: from lay's @/__ryubeom tweet + a pregnant solhwi anon ask. in headcanon form since it's more spontaneous! 
hello tumblr fam! i know, it’s been long... but ficfest and all has kept me kinda busy. a little different this time! a headcanon after a long time, since it’s more fun and easy on the eyes!
extra notes: drumstick reference to hospital playlist episode 4! a little reference to @scripturiends twitter au “dynasty” at the end. have fun! as usual, grammar mistakes by me!
attorney sol and prosecutor joon hwi have been married for a couple years, now well into their early thirties.
sol and joon hwi always take walks in the parks and wondered what it would be like if they had their own.
sol was initially hesitant, with her experience of broken families and having no dad figure. what makes her think her child could grow up in a loving family, if she didn't have one she could be a role model or look up to?
but joon hwi had it worse, having been an orphan from young, and raised by his uncle, his cousins, aunts and relatives ostracising him. yet, he still believed in the happy family he always wanted with sol.
he dreamt of kissing his kids good morning, sending them to school before going to work and sending his wife to work. on nights, they would work on their kid's homework together in fun ways and tuck them in bed after bedtime stories. they would spend the weekends at parks, meeting with seungjae's kid, and the children of their friends.
sol came round eventually, seeing how joon hwi never stopped believing. this time, it was different. joon hwi is not her father, nor is he her step father. he is han joon hwi, the man that saved her lives multiple times. han joon hwi, the man that stood by her when lee man ho was her biggest threat to her family. han joon hwi, the man who loves her, despite being a klutz in school.
he is han joon hwi, the man that loves her for every imperfection and perfection she has.
sol and joon hwi start trying for a baby, which is especially timely when kang sol's mom asks when is she gonna have a grandchild to hold and byeol pipes up saying she would love to have a brother as opposed to sister. (15 years with sisters have made her wonder what it would be to have a little baby boy in the house instead.)
a few weeks after their first time trying passes and sol has been feeling more tired. she's been busy with case after case at kang and park, so she doesn't think much.
only when she misses her period, she freezes. as stressed as she was, even in law school, she has never missed her period or was late. with shaky breaths, she wonders at the slightest chance of having a little life grow in her, as her hand unconsciously travels to her stomach.
sol is excited, but nervous at the thought that maybe nine to ten months later, she would have a child she can call her own in her arms.
over the weekend, sol raised this to joon hwi. joon hwi stops everything and even though he is beyond excited, he stays calm looking at how nervous sol is. together, they go out to get two pregnancy tests, where sol takes it.
the ten minutes of waiting were a complete torture for sol, as she paces back and forth.
"sol, stop pacing. you're going to burn a hole in our floor."
"joon! what- what if it really happens? i'm not ready! how are we ready? you just started your career in the prosecutor office, and i'm buried under cases! i can barely take care of my mom and byeol and myself, what about the child? oh no, what if i'm a bad mom?"
"honey, sit down. look, we'll get through this together okay? no one is ever ready for their first kid. remember seungjae-hyung? he freaked out the day juyeon-noona went into labour and he's a doctor! it's okay, just calm down, alright? do you want warm water?"
when the timer rings, they look at both the tests, showing the double lines indicating a positive test.
sol was pregnant. sol was going to be a mother. joon hwi was going to be a father. their family was starting.
shaking, sol finally let her emotions hit as her tears fall. she was so caught up worrying about herself, life, her work, family; she hadn't had time to process her own feelings on her own. she wanted the feeling of joy of holding her child. she wanted to know what it was like to share a mother's bond with a child.
joon hwi, looking at his wife, only hugged her as she teared up in happiness. his dream of having a family is finally coming. even better, his best friend, his biggest cheerleader, was next to him.
"what are you crying about? you should be happy!"
"j-joon h-hwi ah... we're going to be parents.."
but their journey was far from over. they booked an appointment with juyeon and made juyeon stay quiet about this. seeing the ultrasound and hearing the heartbeats of their unborn child was enough to move sol to another round of sobs and joon hwi held his wife's hand while the tears ran down his face. together, they smiled, knowing that a life was born and growing.
all could have been hidden, but seungjae walked in that moment, asking if his wife wanted to join for lunch. sol and joon hwi were prepared to lie, but having a printed ultrasound scan in their hands, and the fact that they were in juyeon's clinic, a OB-GYN clinic, confirmed suspicions.
"juyeonnie, do you want to go for— joon...hwi?"
"oppa..."
"ah, congratulations sol. congratulations joon hwi." seungjae only smiled looking at the best people he knew become parents. he recognised the pride in joonhwi's eyes, the same eyes he had when juyeon told him they were expecting.
the new parents smiled at their brotherly figure as they wished them a good lunch.
but out from the corner, yeseul spotted joonhwi and sol as she walked into the clinic and she locked eyes with sol. sol slams the door shut and drags joon hwi back and groans, letting a defeated whine.
"sol-ah, what's wrong?"
"yeseul is here! she's probably here for a regular check up, the one she told me about last month!"
and with that, their phones started beeping with countless notifications.
yeseul could put two and two together, especially when it wasn't just sol, but joon hwi in the clinic as well. she texted her boyfriend, bokgi, who spat out his soup when he was eating with yebeom, who sent a string of messages to the group chat.
when sol opens the door again, yeseul only gives a sheepish smile.
"yeseul ah..." sol sighs and joon hwi only smiles, too happy to hide this secret.
"sorry unnie, i can't miss the moment. congrats unnie, oppa! hello, seungjae-oppa, juyeon-unnie!"
"thank you, yeseul. we'll see you next week, as usual?"
behind them, seungjae grumpily argues with his wife.
"why are my ex-classmates seeing you more than i do? i literally work, like, five blocks down at the police station! they live all over seoul!"
"honey, let me see yeseul first, okay? then let's go get lunch. i heard they are serving drumsticks in the canteen today.”
-----
pregnancy wasn't easy for sol. she insisted on working, despite attorney park's orders to take on lesser cases in court. sol couldn't find it in her heart to reject her clients.
yeseul, working closer to sol, would lunch with her to make sure she eats for the sake of her baby. joon hwi did his best to join, despite sol's arguments to not bother and that she can care for herself.
her morning sickness was bad, and she would wake up giddy and nauseous. many times, joon hwi wanted to call jiho to ask him to cover him, but sol would not let him do it. she'll pull herself together and go to work, and promise to take work lightly.
on days she couldn't get out of bed and she was too tired, her mother would come over and cook her nutritious soups, stock their fridge with vitamins and supplements and tonics for sol.
sol's cravings were also odd. she was never one to like sweets, but she found herself craving sugary cakes, cookies and pastries. joon hwi made it a point to stock their cabinets with cookies and buy a cake whenever he could for his wife.
joon hwi was honestly the best husband anyone could ask for. he helped to tidy the house, clean the house while sol was resting. he made soups and tucked sol in bed on her down days.
sol felt bad that she was being cared for and doing nothing in return, but joon hwi would always remind her that she was already doing the most important job, which is to literally grow their kid inside her.
many nights before bed, they would sit together and their hands would rest on her stomach, as they whisper sweet things to their to-be child.
when sol first felt the kick of her child with joon, they smiled so wide, all exhaustion from reports and arguments in their offices were gone. all that mattered was their child responding.
yeseul was beyond excited, as she helped sol with getting furniture and clothes. the study group came together to help them set up a new cot in their small apartment, as the ladies sat while looking at the men, fixing a cot with much difficulty.
aunty yeseul was the first to buy a stuffed bunny for her unborn child, and sol b, even though she was usually cold, offered to babysit in the future.
eventually, attorney park made sol work at home instead of going to the office. she argued that professor kim eunsook was able to teach while pregnant, but attorney park only said "yang jonghoon's orders" and it was enough to shut her up from any complaints.
of course, professor yang. the only person attorney park really is afraid of and listens to.
when they found out that sol was having a boy, joon hwi was lost in thoughts, wondering if he will grow to be like himself. but sol only placed a hand over his and gave a comforting smile.
"remember what you said at the beginning? whatever it is, he will be of the next generation. from him, it will be different."
they then would discuss how they wanted joon hwi's dimples, sol's twinkling eyes and cheekbones and joon hwi's charming smile.
closer to the due date, jiho stepped in to cover for joon hwi as he started to work half days, afraid of leaving his wife at home. sol, now heavily pregnant, really only commuted to the bed from the bathroom and then to the table, where she would spend most of her time reading or doing something relaxing.
yeseul made sol put her on speed dial with sol b, just in case, and so they would be the first to know too.
the morning came when sol woke up to a wet bed and shook joon hwi awake when the contractions kicked in. joon hwi snapped out, grabbed their hospital bag and guided sol to the car where both of them spent the next day in the hospital as sol went through nine hours of labour pains, and another two hours pushing her baby boy.
joon hwi never left once, standing by her side and holding her hand as she pushed her baby out, wiping away the sweat from her face.
when the time came for him to be held in his mother's arms, sol only smiled, knowing that as tough as the past ten months of working, no caffeine and staying up late nights was, it was all worth it for the little life in her arms.
as his son's hand grabbed onto joon hwi's finger, joon hwi made a promise to love this child unconditionally, to guide him in the right direction and bring him up well. sol was right. from him onwards, it will be different.
welcome to the world, seungjun.
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autumnslance · 3 years
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FFXIV Write 2021 #15: Thunderous
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((A longer one. Violence, blood, and fire. Not safe for heretics or dragoons as we step back to last week and the aftermath of “Heady”...))
“There they are!” X’rhun exclaimed. “Thank the gods!”
Alberic only puffed a breath in agreement as they ran across and down the ravine to where Aeryn was tending to an ashen-faced Heustienne.
“The cavalry has arrived,” the injured dragoon said dryly, her damaged chainmail removed to allow Aeryn access to the wound. Not the worst Heustienne had ever taken, but more than bad enough.
“Thank Halone you’re safe,” Alberic said as X’rhun dropped to his knees next to the women to lend his own aid if needed. “We heard from Kal Myhk you’d tangled with a group of heretics—”
“They took us to Avengret,” Aeryn’s voice cut him off; quiet, too steady, too calm.
For a moment the world paused, until X’rhun’s tail lashed as he turned to look up at Alberic.
Aeryn wasn’t looking at him, her hands resting on her knees now, feet tucked under her. Heustienne’s gaze flicked between Aeryn and Alberic, her own questions barely held back.
“Let’s get Heustienne upright,” X’rhun said gently. “And then get back to—”
“Anyx Trine?” Aeryn interrupted. “Will they tell me the truth if I ask? They must know. If what she said is true.” She turned her head slightly toward Alberic without raising her face, looking at his boots. “She said I should ask you.”
“Aeryn…” His mouth was dry.
She looked up finally, lips parting to say more, but instead she drew in a sharp breath, eyes wide and shining silver, not seeing Alberic or anything else around her now.
He groaned, whether in fear or agony or relief, he wasn’t certain.
——
Alberic followed Corran Striker into the house. It was a pleasant little place, clean and airy. The edges of the walls were lined with brightly painted flower and vine designs, and small pieces of colored glass bordered the custom-framed windows to allow some of the light to also reflect rainbows into the rooms--that couldn’t have been cheap, Alberic thought.
“Please, leave your helm and lance by the door. I think my wife will forgive the boots this time.”
“I keep the lance close to hand, you understand,” Alberic replied as he at least set down his helm on the table by the door.
There was evidence of children; their house slippers by the door, a doll on a chair, a set of tin knights cluttering the low table in the sitting room. His heart ached. “What a lovely home,” he said. “Will the missus and children be joining us?”
Corran shook his head. “Emelia’s running some of her crafts all the way to Fallgourd in the Shroud, and took Zaine and Aeryn with her for the fun. They’ve been cooped up too long, she thought.” He smiled fondly. “It’s a way she deals with her homesickness, and shares that part of herself with our children; she grew up traveling part of the year selling wares as a girl in Thavnair.”
Relief, but also renewed wariness prickled along Alberic’s spine as he followed Corran to the kitchen, leaning his lance on the wall right behind his chair as he took the offered seat at the dining table. “Thavnair? That’s a ways away. Explains the colors though.”
“I got rather lucky,” Corran replied, his tone warm and genuine. “She misses it, but is somehow willing to stay with me.”
“Ever think of visiting?” Alberic asked casually as Corran went about the motions of preparing the lunch he had offered the tired dragoon when they had accidentally met in the treacherous priest’s chapel. Corran had seemed surprised to learn of Comfraire’s heresy, but had offered hospitality despite his own shaken state.
“If there wasn’t always so much work to do, perhaps someday we could,” Corran said quietly.
“I think I’d take the chance, perhaps even move permanently, were I a common man with a family. Get the children far from the war, among the wife’s people.”
“I won’t lie; the thought has occurred to me,” Corran said. “Though I’m surprised, Ser Azure; I’d think one like you would want to keep promising future soldiers for the war in Ishgard.”
Alberic shrugged. “As I said; were I a common man, with a foreign wife who misses her home and children with futures to think of.”
The chronometer in the hall ticked steadily as Corran worked. “Perhaps. Though much as she misses Thavnair, I’d miss Coerthas. I love my home, Ser Azure. There’s little I wouldn't do to see our homeland prosper.”
Alberic did not reply, not trusting his tongue to respond to the man’s gall.
As Corran came to the table with sandwiches and a decent-looking ale, Alberic smiled. “Then perhaps you can aid me in protecting our homeland,” he said. He hoped he was wrong about Corran. “I am tracking a dangerous creature I believe the false priest Comfraire was working with, coordinating an imminent attack from the Horde.”
Corran raised an eyebrow. “I’m but a simple farmer, Ser. I don’t know what help I could be.” He glanced down at his plate.
The chronometer in the hall continued to tick.
“Know you of anyone Comfraire spent time with, when not pretending to holy duties? Places the priest liked to go when not tending the church? I hear you were among those who escorted the fellow on his daily walks.”
“A duty many of us in the community shared,” Corran replied, tone growing strident. “Do you accuse me of heresy merely for minding an old man on his daily constitutional?”
“No of course not,” Alberic answered. He pulled the correspondence he had found in Comfraire’s hidden desk drawer from his pack. “These letters however do indicate guilt.”
“Well that is another story, isn’t it?” Corran asked, leaning back in his chair. The humble farmer demeanor fell away as he crossed his arms. “Why play along?”
“I wanted to be wrong. You seemed like a decent man with a family you love.”
“I do love them,” Corran replied, voice low and cold. “You’re very unlucky you came this day.”
“She doesn’t know what you really do, does she?”
“And once we’re rid of you, she never will,” Corran said bluntly. “Our war doesn’t concern her.”
“And the children?”
Corran’s grey eyes clouded like thunderstorms, his lips drawn into a snarl. “You’ll never touch them.”
They both leapt, chairs clattering to the ground. Alberic reached for his lance while Corran moved with preternatural speed to the sideboard, pulling a hidden blade he managed to raise in time to block Alberic’s swing.
The house was torn and broken as they fought, Alberic barely able to acknowledge the damage as they threw each other against walls and through furnishings. Corran had an advantage with his shorter blade in the cramped space, but Alberic was a far more practiced fighter. If he could get hold of a sword--or better disarm Corran of his--then the heretic would soon be at his mercy.
He finally saw his moment, spinning his lance to baffle Corran’s blade before using his more heavily armored frame to knock the taller man through a door and into what had to be the master bedroom.
The sword went sliding the opposite way down the hall, and Corran laughed bitterly.
“Give it up, Striker,” Alberic said, pointing his lance. He could see Corran’s waist and legs, but the broken door obscured his head. “Tell me about the coming attack!”
Corran's laugh only continued, growing deeper and more growling. Alberic’s eyes widened as he saw Corran’s body jerk, bones cracking and skin tearing, swelling as scales overtook skin.
He swung to drive his lance down through the man as a roar shook the windows, and through the back wall an aevis tore its way inside, the colorfully bordered window panes shattering across the bedding. The dragon leapt at Alberic, and he swung up, barely blocking the creature’s jaws from clamping onto his still helm-less head as they skid down the hall from the momentum of its impact.
Alberic managed to roll out of the way as the aevis let loose a gout of flame, the fire catching on broken furniture. It came for him again but he had made it to his feet, dashing back toward the kitchen for room to move. The aevis lunged at him as Alberic braced himself, a heel against the base of the sink.
His lance caught the beast’s chest and with a roar of his own from his Inner Dragon surging forth, he used the dragon’s momentum to pierce it deeper, throwing it over his shoulder and halfway through the large window, more bright glass breaking as the thing flailed, screaming flames across the yard as it bled out around the lance through it.
Alberic had no time to retrieve his weapon as Corran came for him, tearing apart the walls to fit his new bulk through them to get to the dragoon. He was larger than most transformations Alberic had seen, a heavy red wyvern, powerful and burning, his eyes filled with the same intelligence they had held as a man.
Alberic swore and dove out of the way of claws longer than his own hands. He managed to duck and roll under and past Corran and back into the hallway, needing the smaller space to disadvantage the dragon. Assuming said dragon didn’t just shoulder the walls out of his way, his fiery head rearing back to blast Alberic.
He barely managed to dodge, the heat unbearable as the walls with their pretty flower paint warped, melted, and crisped in the heat, flames now filling the house. He couldn’t last in here much longer, but also couldn’t let this fight further endanger the rest of the village, the commotion surely drawing attention, though any other knights would be too far away while Corran likely had more allies nearby.
His feet hit more metal that clattered, and he remembered Corran’s sword. As the beast came for him again, Alberic ducked to retrieve it, rolling in low as Corran leaped at him. With another shout, Alberic swung up, sliding along the floor on his knees as Corran passed overhead, the sword slicing down the wyvern’s side.
Corran screeched, landing heavily against the door in a tangle, blood flowing freely, wings and talons unable to get purchase in the too small space.
Alberic breathed heavily as he stood and hurried into the kitchen. The aevis was still jerking through its death throes, making a pathetic, pained cry as he yanked his lance from it, more blood pumping onto the sink and floor.
Alberic returned to the hall. Corran watched him, panting himself, lifesblood pooling around him as smoke filled the air.
“Finish me,” the dragon rumbled, in something resembling Corran’s voice. “But I want a promise first.”
“A promise?” Alberic asked. “Why should I pledge aught to a heretic?”
A weary claw gestured, holding a limp, blood-covered ragdoll. Alberic went cold. “For...them. They’re innocent. But we both know...Inquisitors….”
Alberic coughed as he shivered. They wouldn’t care that the children were only children. They wouldn’t care if Mistress Striker was Thavnairian--if anything, that would make it worse for her, no matter if she truly was unaware of her husband’s sins.
“Maybe...she’ll take them home,” Corran said. “She misses it. They could have…Not this.” His eyes met Alberic’s.
They were the grey eyes of a man.
Alberic nodded. “I promise,” he answered, as he pushed his lance through the wyvern’s heart. “Your family won’t pay for your sins.”
When he opened his smoke-stung eyes again, the dragon was gone, Corran Striker’s lifeless form before him, eyes colorless glass, smiling in relief.
Alberic considered for a moment, then drug Corran’s body toward the heaviest flames devouring the house, throwing him into the fire. With luck it would be so burned as to obscure how he had truly died, if Alberic was to keep his reckless promise.
The aevis in the kitchen was dead finally. Alberic retrieved the correspondence knocked to the floor during the scuffle, and gritting his teeth, threw all but one sheet into the flame as well; there was mention of a tower. If nothing else he could salvage something from this mess.
The heat and smoke were too much now, and people outside were shouting and trying to put out the flames, a woman screaming as she glimpsed the dragon half-hanging from the kitchen.
Alberic stumbled outside, battered and bloodied, and fell unconscious at the feet of the Strikers’ neighbors.
—————
It took only a few eye blinks before Aeryn’s groan echoed Alberic’s from a moment before. X’rhun tried to call to her, but she was on her feet in the next eye blink. She whirled in Alberic’s direction, braid whipping so quickly the end came back around to strike her cheek, unnoticed. Her eyes were a storm, lightning crackling in them.
Alberic did not move. He distantly realized that there was nothing any of the three of them could do to stop her of all people.
She flung herself forward and he took the weight of her body slamming into his, her hands gripping at his coat.
That was all.
Alberic didn’t dare move as she trembled against him, head down. X’rhun and Heustienne watched, breath held. Perhaps they had realized the same thing he had.
"I'd forgotten the windows,” Aeryn said hoarsely. “They were almost new; a Starlight gift from him, for Mama."
Alberic said nothing. What could he say?
“You didn’t tell me.”
He sighed. It took a moment to make sound. “By the time I’d realized who you were, why you were so familiar...Well, we had that mess with Estinien and neither of us were in any shape for more terrible revelations. Not the easiest thing to tell a girl you’re the man that killed her father, regardless of the why. And...If the Inquisition, the Ward, if any of them had found out…”
“I’d have handled them,” she said. Neutral, a matter of fact. She wasn’t one to boast.
“Perhaps,” he said. “I thought...Your mother took you to Thavnair. You would have a life there, away from the war. I never expected you to return. To be...this.”
“You should have told me.”
“I know. And you know I’m a sentimental, craven fool.”
She laughed, a wild, bitter noise, finally looking up. Her eyes locked with his, and he thought for as much as she looked like her mother, her eyes were too much like her father’s.
“X’rhun, can you make sure Heustienne gets back to Anyx Trine?” She said, not breaking her gaze with Alberic. The storm still rumbled in her eyes, but all he could see was old smoke.
“Of course,” the Seeker answered. “Aeryn—”
“I’m going home,” she said, shoving Alberic away. He staggered, barely managing to keep his footing. She was stronger than she looked. “I need time to think and rest.”
“You mean Revenant’s Toll, yes?” X’rhun demanded, tail still lashing.
Aeryn only nodded once as she retrieved her pack from next to Heustienne.
“Call me via ‘pearl when you arrive,” X’rhun insisted.
She paused for a moment, then nodded again, shouldering her pack and walking away.
“What the seven hells am I missing?” Heustienne asked after they watched Aeryn’s red coat vanish among the hills. “What did she see? What did you do?”
“Later,” X’rhun said, helping her to her feet. “Let’s get back to something resembling civilization first; Avengret’s heretics may still be on the trail.”
Alberic said nothing, simply following along as they made their way across the wilderness.
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ashintheairlikesnow · 3 years
Text
Misread Details: Robert
CW: Dehumanizing language, BBU blanket warning, serial killer/death talk, descriptions of death/abduction/murder, blood, whumper death, some real vague implied noncon references, creepy whumper, sadistic whumper
Part One: Nanda | Part Two: Brute | Part Three: Robert
The Dark Discovery in Robert Weber’s Basement: Box Boy Killer, Part 3
r/LetsTalkTrueCrime
•Posted by u/oshaycanyousee
3 days ago
After Part One, where we learned about the mysterious, but possibly entirely natural, death of Nathaniel “Nanda” Benson, and Part Two, where we saw Henry “Brute” Hanlon’s double life lead to his untimely gruesome murder, you see the single thread that connects these two men who otherwise never met, interacted, or even shared a single person in common… a nameless Box Boy, present at the death of Nanda even if he isn’t responsible for it, and the proven killer of Brute.
It’s my theory that this Box Boy may have accidentally killed his legal owner, Nanda, and then picked up a taste for the act and moved on to taking shelter with those he turns into his victims.
With Brute, he simply didn’t know the man had a wife and children and entire other life, and may have assumed no one would come looking for him or recognize his death. With our third individual, Robert Weber, it seems like our Box Boy Serial Killer got in over his head.
I give you… the Accidental Vigilante death of Robert Weber.
You decide if our unknown killer is simply the unluckiest guy in the world or a killer who even now may be somewhere living with - and earning the trust of - his next victim.
-
One bright and sunny day in the quaint, old-fashioned California town of Rancher’s Rest, Robert Weber was late for work.
Weber worked in a vehicle repair business owned by lifelong “RR” resident Randy Niles, who had known Weber since his childhood and had been his boss since Weber was eighteen years old and fresh out of high school.
Niles, who is now nearly seventy-five and still spends his days in the shop with an Australian Shepherd named Cody and a blind pit bull named Sue keeping him company everywhere he goes, stated that Weber had no living family he knew of beyond his sister in Vermont, and he was just about the closest thing Weber had to a relative just from having known him so long.
“He didn’t have too much to do with his sister,” Randy said in an interview with Unsolved Mysteries. (You can see the interview on the new Netflix reboot of the show! It’s a really good episode, definitely recommend. It’s how I got into this case in the first place.) “Or nobody, really. Just us at work, the guys at the bar, that kinda thing. He was quiet, kept to himself really. You’d never just strike up a chat around town or anything. But he got on just fine with the boys here in the shop. He was a bit of an egghead, too, always going on about this thing or that he’d seen on the news. Little… odd. Little bit off, you might say. But really, who isn’t? In any case, you know, I’d known him since he was a little boy, so he was just Bobby Weber to me.”
Then, of course, one day Robert Weber didn’t show up to work. Randy Niles immediately felt that something was very wrong.
“When nine, nine-thirty came and went and he wasn’t there,” Niles said, “I knew someone needed to go check on him. Bobby showed up for work right on time or ten minutes early, rain or shine, for twenty years. My first thought was maybe he’d had an accident at home, or some kind of, you know, health thing. Almost never called in sick, took one vacation a year, that kinda thing. So I drove right on over there. This would’ve been, oh, probably ten or ten-fifteen when I got to the house. Had my dogs with me, and they never did like Bobby much, but as soon as I opened my door and got out of my truck they just lost their damn minds. Barking, growling, Cody’s hackles were up like you wouldn’t believe. I know it sounds damn crazy, but I’m sure those dogs could smell that evil had been done in that house.”
On camera, Niles goes quiet, here, his gaze slipping away from the interviewer as he scratches at the side of his nose. When he looks back, the hint of good humor that seems to be an eternal part of his expression is gone.
“I didn’t know what Bobby had been up to all this time. None of us knew. I’ve known Bobby Weber his whole life, and I… I had no idea.”
Randy Niles was unable to convince his two dogs to exit the truck, and eventually rolled down the windows to give them some air and a way out if they chose (he is insistent on this point in the Unsolved Mysteries episode - “don’t you dare say I left my dogs locked up in a truck on a sunny day, I sure didn’t - Cody even knows how to pull a door handle if it’s the right kind”) and got out to knock on Robert Weber’s front door.
No one answered.
Niles knocked again. Still no response.
The front door was locked, but Niles was able to locate an unlocked back door into the garage, where he found Weber’s car neatly parked and nothing out of place. However, once he used an interior door in the garage to enter Weber’s home, what he found was so shocking he still struggles to describe it today.
“The, uh. The first thing I saw,” Niles says in the Unsolved Mysteries episode, wiping at his mouth with a handkerchief, “was a cage. Big old cage in the living room. Like a kennel for a big dog, Great Dane or something, except… except, you know, kennels’re usually mostly wire, not that heavy. You can fold ‘em up, put ‘em away. This was… geez. This was pure metal. Bunch of blankets all piled at the bottom, too. Here’s the-... you know, my mind just didn’t want to even make the thought, but I just, I looked at it and-”
In the episode, Niles has to take another moment, here. His eyes grow wet, and his voice is hoarse when he speaks again. “People cage. Bobby had a damn man-sized cage in his living room. That’s when my stomach just fell out. Even then, though, I couldn’t-... I just thought, oh, well, what people get up to in their own homes is their business. But still, I just. I just decided, find Bobby, figure the rest out later. So I kept walking around looking for him.”
Randy Niles continued to call out, hoping to hear Weber’s response, but received none… at first. The radio in the kitchen was playing a local public radio station (“Bobby always hated the country western and classic rock we played at work, he was a big news man, big into classical, jazz, you know.”)
Niles noticed, he says, that the cage next to the couch had a wooden top, as though it were meant to act as a side table, and on that table was a small woven basket. Inside the basket appeared to be several State IDs and Driver’s licenses. Niles took note of this but his first assumption was maybe that Robert Weber had stolen some IDs or something.
Which was technically true, just… not quite the way he thought.
The kitchen, hallway, and all three bedrooms were equally empty of life. Every room was clean, everything neatly in place. Empty bottles of Jameson whiskey, Weber’s favorite brand, were lined up like décor along the mantel, and one half-full bottle was next to two clean, empty glasses on the kitchen table.
Even the beds were perfectly made.
The only thing missing was any sign of Robert Weber himself.
The question of Weber’s whereabouts was answered when Randy Niles heard a sound coming from the open door to Weber’s unfinished dirt basement.
“Like a ghost,” Niles said in his interview. “Just this low moaning sound. Hardly even thought of it as human, you know. But I just-... I called out, ‘Bobby? That you?’ and the moaning got a little louder, like whoever it was was tryin’ to answer. I could still hear my girls in the truck just going nuts, probably worried about me knowing what they maybe could smell even out there. I figured… I figured I’d best call the cops and get them out here. Seemed like a plan. So I picked up my phone and dialed, and then I headed down those basement steps.”
What Randy Niles discovered in Robert Weber’s basement was a dying man, battered and stabbed eight times, lying in a half-dug grave.
Robert Weber had been beaten with the very shovel that had done the digging. The shovel lay off to the side, caked in dirt and blood. Police would find some of Robert Weber’s hair on it, too. Then, the individual who had beaten him had gone back upstairs - blood smears were found on the railing to the stairs - and taken a kitchen knife out of the knife block on the countertop. A bloody fingerprint was found on the side of the knife block. They had then returned to the basement where Weber was stabbed, almost entirely through the stomach and chest, twenty-six times, until the cheap knife simply broke from the force.
Randy Niles admitted in his interview that he became very ill at this time. “From the shock,” He elaborated. “I haven’t been able to smell much since I was in a car wreck when I was young, so I didn’t smell what-... what my girls prob’ly smelled from outside, and what the cops smelled. To me, it was just… just a little off, is all. It was the sight of it that got to me, not the smell. The sight of the-... the hand.”
Behind Robert Weber’s body, the hand of another person was sticking up out of the loose dirt, as though someone was trying to dig their way out.
“I remember… I remember her nail polish was pink. That’s when I got sick, actually, was when I saw that hand with the painted nails. That’s when it just hit me all at once what Bobby had done.”
Randy Niles went back up the stairs and waited for the cops to arrive. Rancher’s Rest is a small town where everybody knows just about everybody else, and Niles was on a first-name basis with every single police officer he spoke to that day and in the days after. He would learn alongside the investigation that Robert Weber was not simply the quiet, intellectual car mechanic he had always seemed.
Instead, Robert Weber was a serial killer whose potential final victim had managed a miraculous, deadly escape.
Robert Weber never answered a single question about his own murder - he never fully regained consciousness and died in the ambulance on the way to the hospital. His injuries were simply too severe. His autopsy showed that the cause of death was a stab wound that went deep into his chest and that he was first stabbed only after the beating with the shovel had taken place. Like Brute, most of his stab wounds were applied post-mortem in a rage rather than as part of the killing itself.
Medical examiners also found scratches on Weber’s face and arms, indicating that he had attempted to defend himself - or someone else had attempted to defend themself from him.
So why was Robert Weber killed, and why was there already a body in his basement? Investigators would piece together the story over the following days and weeks from a crime scene that only seemed to become darker and more baffling as time went on.
Excavating the basement was originally thought to be something that would be brief, but after the first body was removed, another one was found beneath it. Then another off to the side of that. And another, although this was simply bones.
Every time the forensics team thought they’d found the last human bone, they dug a little deeper or in a new spot and found more.
Eventually, the remains of twenty-two individuals would be removed from the basement of Robert Weber’s home, not including Weber himself. The oldest located victim was identified as Melinda Traxson, an Iowa woman reported missing by her family after she ran away in March of 1996… more than two decades before Robert Weber didn’t come to work one day.
Investigators are still working to match up every body with a missing persons’ case. For nearly all of them, the cause of death could not be easily ascertained due to the deterioration of the remains, but some showed signs of skull fractures. Identified individuals so far include:
Melinda Traxson, 19, from Iowa, ran away from home in 1996.
Billie Mortimer, 21, disappeared from a day out with friends at Lake Tahoe one year later in the summer of 1997. Her friends went to get lunch from the car after a swim and when they returned, she was gone.
Matthew Ranger, 22, went missing during a road trip to Yellowstone National Park in 1997 (only five months after Billie). His car was found abandoned by the side of the road with a flat tire.
Karl Janssen, 24, a tourist from the Netherlands who was also visiting Yellowstone, disappeared a month after Matthew. Last seen by an employee of the park who witnessed him speaking with another young man and getting into the man’s car. The employee said that the two seemed to be friendly with one another and did not seem like strangers.
Hannah Pointer, 26. She was reported missing in 1999 by her mother after failing to return home from work in Reno, Nevada. This disappearance occurred more than a year after Karl Janssen’s. Investigators would later discover that during this time period, Robert Weber dated a young woman from his hometown and he may not have wanted to risk her finding out what he was doing.
Isaac Jackson, 26, a Rancher’s Rest resident who disappeared after going out to a local bar to see his friend’s band play in 2000. His car was found submerged in a small pond two years later. This is the first time Weber apparently killed anyone close to home. He was actually briefly suspected in Jackson’s death, as he was the last person noted to see Jackson alive, but was cleared of suspicion at the time.
Dustin Swill, 21, who was driving from Colorado to California to visit his sister who had moved to Berras to work for WRU in 2001. He was last seen in a gas station near Yellowstone, where employees noted he spoke to a man who was smoking outside, who gave him a cigarette. When Swill left, employees saw the man put out his cigarette and leave shortly after. They did not find this unusual or noteworthy at the time.
Maria Vargas, 25, a Rancher’s Rest resident who was reported missing in 2002. Her family is intensely private and have shared few details about her, but it is known that her boyfriend at the time suspected Weber, who had attempted to convince her to leave the boyfriend for him and had apparently threatened her. He remained a suspect but there was never enough evidence to charge him.
Jennifer Striker, 28, from who never arrived for an appointment with a realtor in 2011. The long pause between Maria Vargas’s murder and Jennifer’s appeared to be due to Weber keeping a man named Finn Schneider within his home for more than a year after abducting him, as well as Weber serving five years in prison for a violent assault on a man he believed had sold him a defective vehicle. (Schneider was no longer in the home before the assault and prison time.)
Riley Nievelt, 25, was staying at the Big Meadow Campground with six friends during a weeklong vacation in 2012. She vanished while on a trip to purchase supplies. Her cell phone was found on the ground in the parking lot of the Food Lion in Rancher’s Rest, a short and easy drive away. At this time, with multiple individuals vanishing after being seen in Rancher’s Rest or being residents of the town, police begin to suspect and start hunting for a possible serial killer.
Alexander Peterson, 29, was a long-haul driver who vanished while working. He was last seen at a rest stop in 2014 on the California/Nevada state line, and would likely have passed right through Rancher’s Rest on his journey. He was reported missing by his ex-wife in South Dakota when he did not return as scheduled for a custodial visit.
The most recent victim, and owner of the hand that Randy Niles saw sticking up out of the dirt, was Yolanda Pierce, 26. She was a Rancher’s Rest resident with a troubled relationship with her husband, who had stormed out after an argument and was never seen again. She is believed to have died the same day as Robert Weber.
More remains exist but have not yet been identified. If you or anyone you know has a friend or family member who went missing during this time period in or near Rancher’s Rest, Yellowstone National Park, or Death Valley, it may be worth looking into, as those appear to be Robert Weber’s “hunting grounds”.
Disappearances in Yellowstone and Death Valley almost always matched up with Robert taking one of his rare weeklong vacations from work.
When investigators located three large diaries hidden inside a locked box in Weber’s closet, the first two fully filled up and the third nearly two-thirds finished, they found an exhaustively detailed record of Robert Weber’s crimes.
In these records, they discovered Weber’s first three victims were killed within 24 hours of abduction, with the rest being kept alive for longer and longer time periods. It is believed all of them met their end in Robert Weber’s basement.
Diary entries included records of two victims who were not a part of the bodies buried in Weber’s basement, both of whom may still be alive:
Finn Schneider, 19, a German tourist who disappeared in 2003 during a visit to Death Valley. Until Weber’s journals were found, it was believed he had perished in the park and had simply never been found. Robert Weber also visited Death Valley during this time. No one linked the two together. Evidence found in Weber’s home after his death, including the aforementioned diary entries and photographs, shows that Schneider was alive in Weber’s home for nearly sixteen months. It is believed Weber purchased the “human cage” that Randy Niles noticed around this time. The last diary entry that mentions Schneider states that he was “traded” on June 16th, 2005, to an individual only referred to as “Mouse.” What Weber received in exchange is unclear, but he was seen driving a new, custom-painted truck around this time, which he said he bought “from a personal ad” when asked by Niles about it. Schneider has never been found. However, his mother did receive a phone call in 2013 from an individual she believes to be her son, telling her that “Finn” was okay and to stop looking for him.
Our Box Boy, 334235, purchased by Nathaniel Benson years prior, whose whereabouts had been unknown since he murdered Brute Hanlon. Weber believed the Box Boy to be in his early twenties, according to his diary entries, and mentioned that he had picked the Boxie up hitchhiking and had intended to kill him before seeing the barcode on the inside of his left wrist and changing his mind. His diary suggests the Box Boy remained in his possession for roughly a fourteen months prior to Weber’s murder. Police have not released the details of what the Boxie was subjected to during this time, stating only that it is not the public’s interest for this information to be known, and they would like to locate the missing Boxie and interview him about certain details.
Four murders occurred during the time the Boxie was kept by Robert Weber. Weber noted that “the dog helped” with either murder or burial, suggesting that he may have worked as Weber’s accomplice in his terrible crimes.
Is it possible that they bonded over a shared urge to kill? Did the Boxie start a captive and become a companion?
Weber’s diary contained other disturbing facts, as well:
Weber also noted three failed abduction attempts in detail, in 1998, 2004, and 2017. In each he described with incredible precision of memory the appearances and descriptions of each person he failed to capture. He also appeared to do intensive research using their license plates and other information to find out where they lived and who they were. The names of these individuals have been kept quiet for privacy reasons.
Other failed abductions were noted, about one per year, without much detail. Or at least not enough for police officers to know who they were. Nearly all these failures were in one of three locations: Yellowstone National Park, Stanislaus National Forest and nearby campgrounds, and in or near Death Valley.
The last entry in Robert Weber’s diary was penned the day of his death.
NOTE: Weber referred to the Boxie as “the dog” in nearly all his journal entries. His last entry went:
May 6th, 20XX: The dog is pissed about something again. He’s always pissed about something. I think the thing in the basement probably kept him up all night with her caterwauling. He never gets used to the noises they make. God knows I can’t sleep either, at least not well. I’ll handle her tonight, have a drink with the dog after, see if that shuts up his nonsense for a while. Note: missed NPR interview with Senator Carlotta Grant on new leg. about the bb prohibition act. Find that on website later.
Found in Weber’s home, in boxes under his bed, were a series of restraints made of leather, high-quality items that appear to be custom-ordered to specific measurements. These included “gloves” intended to keep someone from being able to claw or scratch in their own defense, five sets of cuffs, a body harness, a leather half-face-mask that police referred to as a “muzzle”, several gags, some of which were deemed to be “designed to cause injury to the inside of the mouth”, and “other assorted items for use in torture and torment”.
You can find some leaked police docs online that go into more detail, but suffice to say they pretty much match the kinds of “toys” found in Nathaniel Benson and Brute Hanlon’s homes, too. And apparently, if you really know where to look, you can find some blurry low-quality photos Weber took, too.
While the items are a bit salacious, they aren’t entirely uncommon in consensual relationships, too, so it’s really not clear if they’re evidence of the Boxie being held against his will or not.
The investigation of the crime scene suggests that at some point after writing his final diary entry, Robert Weber made himself a pizza, which he ate half of and put the rest away in the fridge. His shaving cream and razor were found out on his sink, and Weber’s body was clean-shaven, suggesting he shaved shortly before his death.
He then watched three episodes of Law & Order: SVU. We know this because he texted during this time with his only living relative, the sister in Vermont. Little is known about Weber’s family and childhood, beyond his sister’s recounting of a quiet, strained home life with an overbearing mother and her mention that Robert endured several head injuries as a child and adolescent, including one that hospitalized him for days.
After he finished watching TV, Weber entered the basement and murdered Yolanda Pierce. It is believed he took the Box Boy downstairs with him, either as accomplice or witness. At some point while he was disposing of Yolanda Pierce’s remains, the Boxie became enraged for one reason or another, beat him with a shovel, got the kitchen knife from upstairs and stabbed him to death, and then left the house.
A neighbor remembers hearing odd noises around 3:30 AM and looking out their window to see a shadowy figure walking quickly down the road, but they weren’t able to see well enough to say whether or not the individual matches the description and WRU-provided photos of the Boxie. It does seem reasonable, though, to assume that the neighbor witnessed the Boxie fleeing the scene of the crime.
The Box Boy has never been seen again.
Police are pretty mum about the active investigation into the Box Boy’s whereabouts. I was able to get ahold of one source closely related to a member of the investigative team who said that there’s just not a lot of urgency. “Weber killed nearly two dozen people, just that we know of,” The source said. “The cops are a little bit ‘good riddance to bad rubbish’ about the situation. Unless the Boxie comes back to RR, they’re just inclined to let sleeping dogs lie.”
The sense of “let it be someone else’s problem” would be understandable… if this Box Boy weren’t responsible for one other direct murder, possibly two.
Police believe the Boxie has not left California, and is likely to be continuing to survive by engaging in prostitution or perhaps panhandling or some other hidden way of making money. Unconfirmed sightings have been located in three cities in central California, but all of these are unverified and should be taken with a grain of salt.
It’s also possible he hooked up with a pet liberation movement group, in which case he may be hiding out in a safehouse, protected from the consequences of his actions by the pet lib movement’s understandable insistence on total secrecy and anonymity for the Boxies they take in.
If he’s an innocent victim of circumstance, that’s fair.
If he’s a burgeoning serial killer with three victims under his belt and a taste for inflicting terrible violence on those who take him in… well… anyone who gives him shelter may be next.
Is our Boxie a purposeful killer or just supremely, almost incomprehensibly unlucky? Will he kill again? Was he Robert Weber’s accomplice or his victim?
Will he strike again?
Should there be an audit of WRU’s psychological testing on potential sign-ups to see if, perhaps, a Box Boy-wannabe with an urge to kill slipped through the cracks?
What do you think?
-
@astrobly @finder-of-rings @burtlederp @whump-tr0pes @raigash @eatyourdamnpears @orchidscript @doveotions @pretty-face-breaker @boxboysandotherwhump @outofangband @whumptywhumpdump @whumpfigure @thehopelessopus @downriver914 @justabitofwhump @butwhatifyouwrite @newandfiguringitout @yet-another-heathen @nonsensical-whump @oops-its-whump @endless-whump @cubeswhump @gonna-feel-that-tomorrow @whumpiary
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iamdarkness · 3 years
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To Feed a Tiger. Forces of Will.3
Chapter 3
Alfonse x Summoner, Alfonse X Summoner X Lif
And one sided (as of now) Dimitri X Summoner X Alfonse X Lif
Triggers for talk about mental health. It is Feral Dimitri after all. Mentions of death and depressive thoughts.
Sexual Harassment and maybe more than that.
Incest. (Freyr and mentions of Freya). Rater R for a little graphic scenes of battle and character death. Nothing we have not seen in the game itself.
-Hrid…- You hear Sharena say under her breath and it feels like all the happiness has been drained from her voice. Of course she would feel sad. Her big brother meant so much to her and seeing him suffer would make her suffer as well. They were so close. He was her best friend, confidant, protector and hero. Watching him so defeated had been a shock and more so that she herself had not reacted fast enough to prevent this. In a way she felt responsible as well.
-Summoner _______. Princess Sharena. Heroes. It is a pleasure to be your guest again.- Hrid says when he is close enough to take your hand and Sharena’s. His hand lingers on yours and you take it back to take Princess Laegjan’s.
- It is indeed as King Hrid has said, a pleasure to be here again.- Laegjarn says as she takes your hand and Sharena’s, her piercing red eyes watch you searchingly.
You greet them equally and introduce your heroes by name and title. You will not have them be nameless heroes to no one. They deserve to be treated, like the heroes that they are. As if sensing your unrest and because he has dreamed of your pain Freyr comes and stand by your side . He blocks Hrid from getting too close to you. You hear young Claude snicker behind you.
-How was your trip to the beach Summoner? I would have liked to come sooner so we could meet you there, but we had a little delay.
- It was great! We even had a sand castle contest and a nice nap.
-They even got a great tan!- Said King Claude nodding to Freyr in particular and you turn to give him a fake angry look. You notice he is watching Alfonse and he winks at him. Alfonse looks like he understands something unspoken.
- I will cherish mine. It was a wonderful and invigorating nap.- Says Lord Freyr to bring attention to his chest and he “looks” sideways to smile at you.
- I can’t say the same about mine my Lord! It stings a lot!- You tell him smiling.
- Yeah we got the wrong lotion, so now we need to go to the infirmary to get fixed up.- Said Sharena sheepishly. You notice Alfonse and Hrid are looking at Freyr’s bare chest. They can clearly see the white mark of your arm on it. Hrid looked a little scandalized and Alfonse… he looked amused. He looks sideways at Hrid.
-Is that…?
-Oh it’s my hand. I kind of hugged him while I was sleeping. Now if you all don’t mind. We need to get to the infirmary. I’ll see you all at the meeting.- You say and leave with the rest of your group to the infirmary. You hear Alfonse talking to Hrid.
-Everyone loves our Summoner. Some more than others and in different ways.- And there is a hint of humor in his words. <<At least he is having fun.>>
~*~
The meeting lasted three hours. Besides the heroes Anna had asked to attend, you had asked Hero King Marth, who was the oldest of the Marths and with more experience, Micaiah, King Claude and Lord Freyr. You were sitting between the former two. They had sat themselves with you in between before Hrid had claimed the chair next to you. You had seen Claude talking to Alfonse and thought they had a plan to distract Hrid or may be just make him re think his life. There was no announcement about the engagement, but Hrid said the royal ball that was supposed to take place in two wees was pushed back for two months. This would give them all time to prepare and gather more information.
- I also hope that by then it will be two good news to announce and not just one.- He tells you and Fjorm when the meeting was over. You feel Fjorm’s cold hand take yours and give it a squeeze.- Dear summoner, would you be so kind to sit by my side at dinner? I would very much like to talk about some important things with you.
-Sure.- You agree to it because, you want him to give you a reason to tell him you are not interested. Alfonse and Fjorm did not sacrificed themselves, for this man to think you are going to fall at his feet after a dinner. Besides, you were sure Claude and Alfonse were planing something and you trusted them. You turned to Fjorm and winked to let her know you got this. She blushed at this.
Once at dinner you do sit by his side. Commander Anna is sitting at the head of the table.Alfonse is sitting about three chairs from you, between Fjorm and Sharena. The chair next to you is the other head of the table and it is still empty. Suddenly, you see F Dimitri come inside the dinning hall. He seldom comes in here and you signal for him to come and sit by your side. He complies. Claude and Freyr sit on the chairs in front of you and Hrid.
Dimitri was dressed in a dressy black suit with blue cape that Forest had designed for you to give him. His hair was up in a ponytail.
-Dimitri. You look so handsome! Did you like the clothes?
-Thank you _______. I…they feel comfortable.- He says and his face is crimson red.
All through dinner Freyr and Claude kept on talking to you and taking your attention from Hrid. Claude was blatantly flirting and Freyr...you were looking at a different side of him, to be sure. It must have been because as someone who could be in your dreams, had the ability to see things others didn’t and know things about you that no one else understood, but he got your sense of humor. Something even Alfonse had, had trouble to adjust to, not understanding your references and knowledge. You had to read his same books to be able to make new references and jokes. After years of being together he had taken your humor and understood what you meant and some of the heroes even used your slang. Freyr was different. He knew stuff and he used the obscure references to make you laugh and it gave the conversation a more intimate feel.
Still you were giving Dimitri all the attention you could because he was important to you and wanted to make him feel that he was cared for.
-We should go to the beach tomorrow and make it a drink contest.- Says Claude smiling at you.
-Oh my Lord give me patience! I am not taking you to get drunk Claude. I have never seen you drunk, but let me tell you; you do not need it.
-I can not give you patience child. Only good dreams and many children.- Lord Freyr says smiling at you. Hrid stops eating to look at him. You notice Claude and Dimitri are doing the same. You laugh at it. You keep forgetting he is the god of fertility as well. Freyr turns to them and says amused.
-I am the god of dreams and fertility. Do you want my blessing?- He turned his closed eyes at Claude who laughed out laud and bring his hands off in a guarding motion.
Everyone seemed to breath again.
-Wait have you given ______ your blessing?- Claude asks and winks at you. You feel your cheeks heat up.
-I would give her, as many children as she desires.- He answers Claude. The wording is very on purpose and it seems it is not lost on the people sitting at the table. You hear Hrid chock on his food.<< Oh God! What are these guys doing!?>> You spy a look at Alfonse and he looks amused if not a little red faced and concerned, but amused non the less. You give Hrid your glass of water to drink and wait to see if he needs you to perform the whatever maneuver. He drinks the water and start breathing right. He thanks you with a blush to his cheeks. He looks mortified about the incident.
-Yes Claude. I’ll be having thirteen children.- You say the first number that comes to your mind.
- I’m going to need a bigger table at home then.- His eyes twinkle with mischief.
-You better. My whole soccer team and I will be visiting you often.- You hear sounds of laughter coming from various sides of the table.
-Hey! I meant children with my beautiful green eyes.- He wiggles his brows.
-Well you better start looking for a wife then, because those are a lot of kids to have. You better start soon.
-That is so mean!- He says fake hurt, dramatically touching his heart.
-You gave Dimitri your blessing.- Dimitri says suddenly, breaking the conversation and looking at Claude in a cold and annoyed manner. He is asking Freyr about baby Dimitri.
-May he never lack good dreams. They are the rest of the mind and the refuge of the soul.
-God, that is so true. I’m tired of dreaming of going to battle and finding my self back in school butt naked - You hear a noise like someone almost spit their drink. Hrid by your side actually laughs.- or zombies in the battlefield eating my heroes. The living dead. - You elaborate after you see Hrid’s confused expression.
-Are you afraid of school and the risen?- Asks Hrid trying to catch your attention away from Freyr and specially Claude.
-Heck no! Zombies are rotten corpses that eat the living like wild rabid animals. I used to watch a lot of moving pictures about them before coming to live here. I’m cool with risen. I even like the red eyes. I like red eyes. They’re kind of sexy, depending of whoever has them.- Of course you are talking about Lif.- And school…I mean…the bad part is finding yourself butt naked in a public place.
-I wonder what that dream means if it is a recurring dream.
-I think it means…- You get cut short by the conversation in the table next to yours.
-Oh You heard that Lord Corrin? The summoner finds red eyes sexy!- You hear Nile’s voice loudly tell Corrin.
-What the hell Niles! Why are you listening to my conversation?- You throw him your balled up napkin. He only laughs. Corrin who is sitting by his side, hits him with his elbow. You hear an “Ouch” followed by Niles laughing.
-Summoner you were talking loud enough for the whole kingdom. This makes you laugh too.
You look sideways at Alfonse who is talking to Fjorm. She seems to disagree with something he said, sighs and nods.
After a while when some of the heroes start to get up from the tables you hear Alfonse clear his throat. Claude is looking at him and you turn just in time to see Fjorm say something to Hrid.
-_______. Would you care to sing something for us?- Asks Hrid.
-Right now?- <<Are this guys trying to kill me of embarrassment?>>
-Yes _____! Sing that song you sing with the guys on campaigns! - That was Claude.- Make it to Freya like last time! You don’t mind, do you?- He asks Freyr. Freyr shakes his dead.
<<WTH is he talking about?>> there are many songs you like singing with the heroes when in campaigns by the fire light so you are kind of confused. He makes a gesture and you get it.
-Oh…Fine.- You agree mostly because that song does not need the best of voices. You lean in to talk softly to Dimitri.- Dimitri. It is going to get loud.- He nods at you like he is ready.- You look around and catch Shigure’s eye and signal to him. He goes pink but nods.
-When a humble bard…-There was a choir of whistles, “Yeah!”s and shouts.
Graced a ride along
With Geralt of Rivia
Along came this song.
From when the White Wolf fought
A silver-tongued devil
Her army of elves
At her hooves did they revel . - Freyr does look entertained.
They came after me- Shigure stands and sings alongside you.
With masterful deceit
Broke down my lute
And they kicked in my teeth
While the devil's horns
Minced our tender meat
And so cried the Witcher
She can't be bleat
Toss a coin to your Witcher -Everyone starts singing. Hrid’s brows are knitted and he is looking around to see everyone singing. Even some of the heroes like Tibarn who had gone out had come back to sing.
O' Valley of Plenty
O' Valley of Plenty, oh
Toss a coin to your Witcher
O' Valley of Plenty
(Rest of the verses here)
Toss a coin to your Witcher
O' Valley of Plenty
O' Valley of Plenty, oh
Toss a coin to your Witcher
A friend of humanity X3 - You leave the last choir to Claude who has the perfect voice for the part. ( 1)
By the time you finish the song everyone starts screaming. You have no idea why they like that song so much but every time you all sing it; it feels like you are all pirates or something.
-Goddess! I love that song. For a minute I felt I was in a tavern somewhere in a town far away riddled with monsters and villains.- Says Claude.
-You mean Fodlan taverns anywhere?- Asks Dimitri. He sounds serious, but the gruffness of his voice is gone and it makes you happy to see him put the effort to joke around. Claude laughs out loud and can only nod to agree.
All around you could hear the heroes talking excitedly about one thing or another. Some where inviting others to the town tavern. Others like Lady Camilla is heard telling someone something like “We should dress like pirates next Pirate Festival dear!”.
-That was something, you don’t see every day.- Says Hrid smiling and he looks entertained.- You are something else summoner. Who is the Witcher?
-Freyr.- Says Claude at the same time that Freyr says your name.
- It is a story about a monster hunter called Geralt of Rivia, that is sent to fight a half goat or ram and half man who was helping some elves, who were the “terror” of the nearby towns. I changed it for Lady Freya and her dark elves, who we had to fight in our dreams some time ago, with the help of Lord Freyr. I say the Witcher would be Lord Freyr. He was the one who gave up his life to save us. I summoned him some time ago.- You raise your cup to him in a toast. He smiles at you.- Besides he has the long white hair and beautiful golden eyes.- Hrid looks at Freyr and Freyr opens his eyes to reveal his beautiful eyes. They are a liquid, luminous gold color. They glow as if with the light of liquid fire but not quite lava.
-I thought he was blind.- He says in wonder. You could understand him. Lord Freyr was a beauty to behold. Even in his animal form he was the most beautiful being you had ever seen. Even the ethereal beauty of Lady Freya was nothing compared to him. Everyone was either a little jealous of him, felt intimidated by him, or had a crush on him.
-Just sleeping. - Freyr says calmly.
-Talking about sleeping. I need to get the younglings to bed. Dimitri what are you going to do?
-Whatever you ask of me.- He says readily eyeing Hrid. He has noticed how clingy he seemed to be with you and he does not trust him.
-I would like you to come with me on my patrols tonight; if that is alright with you. -His brows furrow and he gives Alfonse a long look. Alfonse seems to be listening but avoids looking at you.
-I will come with you.
-Hey I thought I was coming with you my dear!- Says Claude.
-You can come to get the kids to bed if you want to. I am going to need a handsome prince for tonight’s fairy tale and Marth is busy.- You tell him teasingly. Hero King Marth who is walking by looks your way and blushes.
-That is so cruel.- He says and pouts.
-Summoner. I was wondering if you would like to take a walk with me in the gardens or I could take the watch with you.- Says Hrid.
-Omm, I really need to take Dimitri. There are things I would like to talk about with him, but if you do not mind you can come to story time and then take a walk. Since my prince charming is sulking right now. It looks like he does not want to cooperate.- You notice Claude is looking at Alfonse and you have this distinct feeling that surprises will keep happening before the night was out.
<<Seriously guys? Like my heroes need to be told to do weird crap.>>
Dimitri went to prepare for your watch together, but before he left, you saw him frown at Hrid who returned it with a cold look. This of course annoyed you to no end because no one treats your babies that way. You go to the living area where the children gather every night for a hero to tell them a tale. You do this twice a week, usually with Alfonse by your side. You really wanted to be petty and reenact Frozen with Hrid as the prince, but you remember Anna and Alfonse said to treat him right.
<<Fine>>
When you are done with the kids you and Hrid go take that walk in the garden and decide that if he starts coming on to you; you will have to nicely let him down. You are even waiting for the chance. You are sitting on a bench around the entrance that lead to the Eastern stables. Hrid has like the spot to take a rest and sit as close to you as possible. Lucky for you the hour was still early enough that many heroes are still around and you do not feel uncomfortable.
- The heroes are very fond of you _____. It is very impressive to see. I have been told so many things about you and I thought it would be impossible for someone to posses so many qualities like you; but I can see that not only are all of those rumors true…they do not make you justice . I can see what you do for the heroes and for the people. I was told you aided in a birthing yesterday.-You nod but say nothing when he keeps talking.- I remember the first time I saw you. You came to help heal me and ask if I needed anything. My sister Gunnthra was so fond of you. She believes you are destined to be part of our family. I can only agree with her good judgement.
- I feel very humbled by her favor towards me. I…- Just thinking about her, and her horrible demise brought tears to your eyes.- I wish I had, had more time to know her better. Sometimes… I wish I could see her in a dream and see her happy again. I also wish I could save Fjorm…from everything. -He looks moved by your statement but he has no idea that he is the one you want to save her from.
-It may do her good to spend a weekend at home. You could come and visit with her. It would bring us happiness if you did. It would make me very happy.- He says and takes your hand in his cold one.
-I think it would be good for her to do so, but I am afraid that as long as there is a war; my place is here and I can’t take more than a day off every week. You see…I…-There is a pause since you were distracted by someone walking on your far left, as if trying to not be seen.- Hey!! Valter? You are back!. What do you have there?- You get up and walk towards the tall man.
-A shake…- He says . He has heard you say that to other people jokingly. He is not turning around to face you and has something big on his shoulder.
- Valter?- He finally turns around and you see he is all bloody from a wound on his arm and leg. There are gashes as if from big paws.- Oh god Valter! You are hurt! Let me see! You’ve been gone for three days! I know you came early but look at you!
-I am fine summoner. I will go to the healers in a while. Here.- He lowers the thing he has been holding on his shoulder.- I gift you the man eater,that has been plaguing the villagers in the Western villages.- He places the mountain lion at your feet. His tall figure kneeling on one knee to better show his prey.
- A fine prey Valter. I could not have chosen a better hunter. -He smiles with pride. At first you and Valter had not see eye to eye, with his way of trying to make you be afraid of him and calling you prey.  Alter he had a lot of talking to by Alfonse and Leon/ Fomortiis, you had come to an understanding and now It was a better relationship. You may not trust him as a person but you trusted him to be himself and now you had a better understanding of his motivations and personality. You also valued and respect his skills.- I thank you for an excellent job.- You take our your handkerchief and clean his mouth. It is dripping with blood and it is not his.
-Will you partake of it Summoner?- He asks lifting it up to his shoulder again.
-Of course, but only after it is cooked if you don’t mind. Are you going to skin it in the kitchen? -He nods- I’ll go take a look during my watch. Valter don’t eat it raw! Those cats have worms in their meat. - He nods and smears your cheek with blood. - Valter…- you whine at his retreating back. He gives a loud laugh.
- Was he drinking its blood?
- Yeah, probably.- You say whipping the blood off of your face.- I’ve told him not to eat it raw. I am afraid he is going to get sick in the long run, but he told me he was not going to live that long. Now I am seriously thinking of not returning him to his world… I’m gonna have to adopt him or something. - You notice now Hrid is looking at you a little open mouthed.
<<What did I do?>>
-Summoner!- You hear the shout of a familiar voice. You see a mop of white hair shinning bright in the light of the torches. His red eyes burning with annoyance.- Naga’s brat changed his patrol to be my partner. Did you allowed this?
-No Mr. Grima. I didn’t know about this. Which of them?
-The first one…the one from the river.- <<Oh Marth>> He says it pouting. You take his hand.
- Grima, dear. You have to understand that sometimes people may want to be your friend. Has he ask you about Robin?
-No. Never.
-See? He is not interested in returning Robin like Chrom wanted to, not only because he has never been friends with Robin before, but because he knows quite well there is only you in that body. What he wants is to be your friend. You see, like you; Hero King Marth was summoned after death. He will be staying here after the war, like you. I have talked to him already Grima dear. He has no evil intention towards you. He just wants to be your friend.- He looks to his side and thinks for a moment.
-Fine worm; but if he so much as thinks about “bringing back” Robin, I’ll eat him.- He is still kind of pouting and kind of bashful about it. You ruffle his hair playfully. He growls but lowers his head to rest on your shoulder.
-Come here you grumpy dragon. -You give him a hug.- Give the man the chance you gave me and Alfonse. And if he so much as hurt a single hair of my -You whisper so only he can hear- Baby dragon ( 2 )…I will personally behead him or something.
-Don’t call me that worm!- then he adds in a softer tone-…eat him…- He sounds angry to other people but you know him well. He does not move his head. You don’t know it, but he sends Hrid a venomous look.
-I’ll eat him whole Grima. He’ll make some great tacos or burgers, sausages…Ug! I grossed my self out now.-  You say laughing. He gives you a low laugh as well.- I didn’t see you at dinner Grima.
-I was busy training.
-I know. Here if you go to the kitchen and get something to eat’ I’ll give you this candy…but don’t tell Gaius about it.- He lets go.- Oh Valter is there with this mountain lion he killed. We ate roasted beef.- He makes a face. He dislikes Valter and mountain lion.
-I don’t like mountain lion. Fine. I’ll eat him instead.- He says smirking and turning to leave.
-No Grima! You’ll get sick!- You say laughing hard. You know he is kidding.
-That…That is the Fell Dragon Grima?- Asks Hrid when Grima is gone. You nod smiling.- The terror and destroyer of the world?- He looked at your face and can almost see pride in them, like a mother showing off his child who has done something great. And of course you feel pride. Grima was loved and happy. He no longer wanted to avenge himself, he wanted to be loved and be accepted. This was a big win for you.
The rest of the walk is spend like this. You walk for a while and then a hero shows up and take your attention away from Hrid. He seems a little frustrated but at the same time, that look he gives you, like you are something precious does not fade from his eyes. It is the time for you to go and you are about to say good night when he asks something of you.
-This night has been wonderful. I have seen you work your magic and the more I see, the more I think you would be a great queen.
<<Oh crap!>>- I am just a regular person who wants what’s best for her people and home. -<<Yeah sound more patriotic why don’t you?>>
- I know. That is the reason. I - He makes along pause and seems to change his mind on what he wanted to say.- I know, I asked this of you before but, I really would like to hear you sing. Only this time. Would you sing a love song? What would you sing to the person you want to spend the rest of your life with?
-I really am not that great a singer. I just like music a lot and since I came here I lost my… music so I sing it, to not for get it… besides I…that is very personal.- You say uncomfortable. This was going sideways fast and you knew it.
-I understand. I also understand you do not know me enough to fall in love with me. You must know by now I wanted ask for your hand in marriage, but I will not push it. I just want to hear what Fjorm has heard. It would make me really happy.
You think about it and realize that how worst could it really get? It was not like you were going to accept him any way. -OK, let’s walk this way.- You tell him and start singing when you are almost under Alfonse’s balcony.
I say I'll move the mountains
And I'll move the mountains
If he wants them out of the way. -- It did feel like you had to move a mountain to reach Alfonse, when you had just met. Now
look at you now. You could barely part from each other.
Crazy he calls me
Sure, I'm crazy
Crazy in love, I say.
I say I'll go through fire
And I'll go through fire -- There are flashes of you fighting alongside Alfonse to beat Surtr.
As he wants it, so shall it be
Crazy he calls me
Sure, I'm crazy
Crazy in love, you see.
Like the wind that shakes the bough
He moves me with a smile -- Yo see him in your mind’s eye smiling that rare sweet smile he has only for a few precious people and you.
The difficult I'll do right now --Well you did gave him an army of heroes and manage it well.
The impossible will take a little while -- And you will end the war and win it for him.
I say I'll wait forever --You look up to his window. Up till now you had been looking at the starry sky but the light in his room had gone out. He was surely looking out the window.
And I mean forever-- That was your promise. You will wait for ever for him.
If I have to hold up the sky
Crazy he calls me
Sure, I'm crazy
Crazy in love am I
Crazy in love am I. ( 3)
Luckily Hrid had not been here long enough to know where your room or Alfonse’s room lay. He did not know he had witnessed your promise to him.
-That was beautiful. That song… I could imagine you fighting against Surtr…Saving my land and my people.
<< Oh Lord! You have to be kidding me. This is what he got from this?>>
-You have to remember your highness, that I was not alone and I did the least of the fighting. You have Alfonse to thank for that and The Order. -<<And your sister’s sacrifice…>>
- I was lost in the song I have to confess. You look so beautiful right now. It is easy to forget everything else.- He steps closer to you. You are hit with the urge t to step back, but you have to stand your ground.- _____ I want to get to know you better. I want to be more than just acquaintances. I want to be..
<<God I hope he says best friends! Why can’t someone just come and save me?>>
-...more than just your ally. I want to be there when you need me and be the one you can count on.
<< Sir you are describing Alfonse…>>
-Hrid. I appreciate the sentiment. It is always a good thing to get to know the people that are important in our lives. I do agree with that, yet I need to tell you; that with the war and all the work I need to do; I can not offer you more than friendship. My priorities..
-She tells us all the same thing. Can you believe that? So very cruel Summoner.- Says King Claude from behind you.- I apologize for the intrusion, but princess Sharena has need of your help. Delthea drunk a kettle of coffee and is now running around playing pranks on unsuspecting heroes. I think she hid in the tower. Also Dimitri said he will be waiting for you in the library in half an hour.
-Oh Lord! Hrid, please forgive me for leaving you. Delthea is a very powerful and very imaginative witch, I can’t have her do this at this hour.
-I understand completely ______. In fact I would like to be of assistance.-  Hrid said eyeing Claude.
-That would be amazing. I just need to warn you about the consequences; but if you are alright with cat ears, be our guest. -Claude points to his head. Sure enough there lays a set of black velvety cat ears.
-Oh for God’s sake Claude! Wait. Is there a tail to match?…Oh what am I saying. I’m sorry Hrid. You better sit this one out. There are just so many guys with cat ears and tails I can manage in one night. I will see you tomorrow. Have a good night.
-As you wish. Good night and pleasant dreams.- You thank him and go away with Claude.
- You look so cute Claude.- You say and laugh.
-Mm interested in petting my ears  _____?
When you two are far enough, Claude takes his fake cat ears off and meet up with Freyr and Delthea who is not really playing tricks on anyone.
- I almost didn’t make it. I apologize ______ . I did hear you tell him you are not interested. That is good. I don’t think it will stop him though. It feels like no matter what we do, he can’t seem to mind that the heroes flirt with you. I mean I understand. I see you do this every day. You care for everyone and they can’t help but adore you and I understand it quite well and it only makes me love you more.- He says it matter of fact like he is not baring his feelings in front of other people.
-Claude…
-I know ____. I should have considered it. He just looks so stiff, controlling, possessive and well cold, I thought he would find it uncomfortable. Make him re think his choice. I’m thinking even you telling him you are not interested in a relationship may be making him more persistent. Like whenever you tell Valter not to eat mountain lion raw…He already ate the liver by the way. I saw him a couple of minutes ago.
-What?- Face palm <<OMG Valter. I feel like I’m dealing with toddles!>>
-Well. It is done. We will see what we can do tomorrow.
-I suppose. - You start walking towards the library where Dimitri would be waiting for you, but make some space to talk to Delthea quietly. -Oh Delthea. Did you ever find out what the book was about?
-Oh…I did ask Alfonse but he could not open it. He asked me where I had found it and I showed him. He had never seen it or heard about it before. He did not tel me the exact translation, but said it was about the first King of Askr. I asked him if I could help him find out how to open it and he said it was fine by him, so as soon as the Ice King takes off we get to work. I also told him I wanted to help him with his project and I managed to convince him to let me help. Like you say: “ Two heads are better than one.” he just told me not to tell you. ______ he is very upset. I am worried about him. I mean if he asked Claude to help him it means he is very desperate. That man better leave tomorrow or I will bewitch his underpants to be itchy for a month! What?! I can guarantee you he will never know it was us. Just like the time I turned Lord Virion’s undergarments pink. -she giggles.
- Was that you? Oh my God. -Virion was still looking for the culprit.- Please don’t do that. I don’t need more trouble for the Order or Askr. We can leave it as last resort though; in case we can’t find a way to break the deal.- You tell her to settle her down. When you finally meet up with Dimitri, you notice he is talking to Freyr and offering him something. On a closer inspection you see it is one of the key pendants to the tree house.
- I can not guarantee you she will not follow in a way, but no one will be getting in there but you, _____ and I, so there will be less chance of someone spiking your drinks. I am taking dreamless sleep pills and can’t dream. She will not tempt me.
- I feel touched by your gesture. I will take you up on your offer if you are sure of it.
-I am. I thought about it. I figure it would be hard to return to your room.
-Then I will stay with you. Thank you. I will wait for you reading in the library until you are done with your patrol.
- You can join us, if that is your wish.- Says Dimitri. Freyr seems to be thinking about it.
-I thin it is better for me to wait here. There are books here I have never read before.
Claude says his goodnights and leaves. Delthea stays to tell Freyr about the awesome book she found and where she found it. You are crossing the door to the outer grounds to talk to the inner wall guards. It is half past midnight.
-Dimitri. What you did back there for Lord Freyr. I am really touched and thankful for it. I thought about changing his room, but you know how all the rooms are the same except for Alfonse’s and mine, so it would be all the same. I was thinking to take him to my room and sleeping on the study. I was sure he would not agree to that. Then I thought to let him stay in one of the rooms at the infirmary.
-I thought about it when you told me what had happened to him. I am sure it was much more serious than what you mentioned.
- It is. It is much more serious.
-He seems to feel safe around you.- <<As do I>> He thinks.
- I wish I could save him from her.- << I already watched him die once…I could not take it if he were to die again because I failed.>> You do not voice your fears with Dimitri. It is better for him not to trouble himself with your fears.- I could have offered to sleep with him, but even voicing this sounds bad. Askr is so very conservative. - <<Although…We could camp out in the tree house with Dimitri! Wait…that sounds like a threesome or better yet a “treesome”…Damn!>>- we could…- You get cut short by your messaging pendant getting too warm. Something is wrong. Then you hear someone shouting your name. It is Gordin.
-______!!! Lord Freyr told me to tell you the Elmblan Empire is crossing our borders! They are about to attack the keeps in the Northern towns. He saw it some moments ago and sent Delthea to tell Commander Anna.
-Thank you Gordin! Dimitri. I need to tell Alfonse and Sharena.
-I can tell the princess!- Says Gordin seriously.
-Thank you! Let’s go Dimitri.- You feel the pendant again. It was Anna. The message was to get ready.
You are running down the hall to Alfonse’s room when his door opens up. You see Hrid and Fjorm getting out of her room down the hall.
-Lord Freyr saw Embla crossing the Northern border and attacking the keeps.
-Let’s get ready. Inform the heroes on rotation. We will wait for you in the War room.- You nod and walk yo your room to get to the list in the study, but you get waylaid by Hrid and Fjorm who tries to persuade him to wait until they are called.
-Are we being attacked?
-Not ourselves. The keeps in the Northern border are about to be attacked. We will probably march in a while. I’ll keep you posted. I need to call my heroes on rotation.
You enter your room and then the study. You hear Dimitri say something and then shut the door.
-_______. I am not in rotation, but I want to fight. Is Lord Freyr fighting too?
-Let’s see. He is in rotation…but…
- Let him go. It will keep his mind off of his troubles. I will fight too and keep my eye on him.
-If you are sure; I’ll add you to the rooster.- You start sending the magic signals to the heroes in rotation and once you are done you take the list with you to the War Room. On your way out you see Fjorm and Hrid are meeting after preparing themselves to fight. They follow behind you to the War Room.
-Fjorm, you are not in rotation. You are part of the base defence today. You want to come with?
- Yes. I already changed my turn with Mathilda. Oh and I found Valter on the way. He said he will be ready when you are.
-He is not on rotation. In fact he was supposed to still be off today, but returned early…well I guess. He can come.
- What is this about rotation?- Asks Hrid. He is dressed in full armor and ready to go.
-It is the way to manage the heroes. One part fights, another part is left as reserves and the defence stays to defend the castle and the people of town in case there is an attack while we march off. The heroes change every battle. Right now we are about to see where we are about go and what we are about to do and decide if we need to do some changes in the groups. Just like the Royal army.
-You manage it all by yourself? Impressive.
-Well it is my job to get to know the heroes abilities and weaknesses . Then decide who works better in what situation and what they should be doing and who to send them with. You know, tactician’s planing. I make the suggestions and then Alfonse, who is the brain decides if the draft is right for what he thinks the enemy is doing and stuff. He’s a genius. Then Anna makes the final decision… but I mean I also like to have other opinions. Like Robin’s and Soren’s for example. It is all simple and regular army managing.
- Well. Not really. Remember when we fist met and you had suggested this to Commander Anna, because you were afraid someone would try attacking the castle when you were away, just like the time Embla had tried to destroy the Summoning Ruins? I also remember Anna apologized to you for not taking your suggestion of having a fire brigade before Surtr attacked into consideration. It was also your idea to make the Heroes their Order Cloaks to blend in with the surroundings and re designed the Regular Army’s new camouflage uniforms. The Royal Army even changed theirs as well! (4)
<< God Fjorm! Don’t help me look good now!>> Hrid looked impressed. Fjorm looks sorry.
-I saw the changes. I like the new uniforms and their usefulness. Amazing!
-Well none of those ideas are mine. I just took them from what the armies use in The World of Steel. I mean, sometimes Alfonse lends me his brain cells and I do come up with some good ideas, but mostly it is him doing the job. I just help along.- Fjorm laughs at this. She knows what you mean, but the two men look at you with different levels of confusion. You finally arrive to the War Room and after asking if you wanted him to wait outside, you let Dimitri stand by your side during the briefing. Fjorm had stood on your other side and signaled Alfonse to stand by her. After a moment she whispers a quiet “sorry” in your ear. She moves from between you two to go talk to Laegjarn. You can feel Alfonse’s hand lightly touch yours when she leaves. God! How you wanted to touch him. Hold his hand and disappear from the world.
Since Lord Freyr’s dream was a forewarning you had time to get to the site and wait for the enemy to attack. It would be an ambush. You fear you will have to spend the trip avoiding Hrid and stealing moments to talk to Alfonse. During the first part of the night when you were walking besides F Dimitri, you remember he had wanted to talk to you about something important.
-So Dimitri. What was it that you wanted to talk to me about?- Dimitri looked taken aback for a moment and then he looked around to see if anyone was hearing you.
- I…I have been watching Lif when he comes to watch you…- He says and suddenly you are attacked by the memories of your last encounter.- I apologize for not telling you directly…I did not know if he was real or not.
-Lif…-<< My Alfonse>> the thought passes your mind faster that lightning and you had no time to question it.- I… I can see why you would think that. He is… He looks so …-<<Beautiful>>- different. My regret. -You had know he had seen Lif. Of course you did, but you wanted to let him tell you in his own time after that one time he avoided the subject.
-I saw him go inside your window…I am sorry. I was not thinking strait. I let him in, not sure of who he was until you mentioned him. I just knew he loved you and he wanted to be near you… so I let him. I wanted to know what he would do. Understand him.
You lower your head before someone notices your watery eyes as they fill up with tears. Those words were breaking your heart… and now he was gone.
-Don’t worry about it Dimitri. I practically invited him. I also understand you… and I can see your instincts are working just fine. I trust them and I trust you. Besides. I wanted to see him so badly. I was not sure if he had survived and now I know he is…still fighting.
- You love them both…
- I… I do…Do you think me wicked?
- At first. When I did not know who he was. I understand now. Would you tell me how it went? All of it? I want to know about him.
- I don’t blame you for wanting to know. He is an interesting person. I mean, he is Alfonse but…They are the same, but different. Alfonse plays the violin you know. He plays like the angels in heaven…They are both violin music, but different pieces you see? Both highly intelligent and both seriously passionate in everything they believe and do…but like music Alfonse is intense but contained, controlled, like Vivaldi’s Winter And Lif is just as intense but unbound like Devil’s Thrill…Both beautiful to behold but …Oh crap I forgot you don’t know what I’m talking about. The music sound kind of like - You hum the music and explain the differences in rhythm and tempo. You look at him to see if he gets it and you see him smiling. You have never seen him smile.- Heh… I got a little carried away didn’t I?- He nodded.- Were you there when he left?
- Yes.
-I still have to tell Alfonse. I forgot to do so with the…arrival of our guests and everything else.-You backpedal to not tell him about the engagement.
-You will tell him? Everything?
- Of course. I don’t want to keep secrets from him. He knew what I was doing. That was the reason he was not home. We wanted to help him. We even had a plan on how to do so and…you saw. It all went sideways. Alfonse knew Lif would decline our offer, but I wanted to believe. I could not even tell him the plan… I felt so selfish asking him to stay.
- It would be painful to be around you and not be near…
- (sigh) yeah…and let’s not forget Sharena.- You start telling him how everything had started. How you all had thought he was the first king of Askr and then found out the truth. You tell him about Sharena’s flowers he had placed in that shine he had made. You tell him about your Summoner’s coat folded neatly among your favorite flowers. His parent’s crowns. How he had built the shrine because there was no bodies to bury and no tombs to take flowers to. You explained his plans and how he had changed his mind to help you. How he had been used like a marionette by Hell to kill you and how you had finished her with the his most precious possession. His Summoner’s Breidablik…you omit it was your own weapon or so you thought.
After a while there is a pause in the trek for rest and meals. By this time the sun was already coming up. While you are talking to the men,you are interrupted by Hrid who wants to be your guard during the battle.
- King Dimitri is her guard today. He is her support.- Says F Dimitri in his gruff voice. Hrid looks coldly back at him, and you sense he is about to retort. There is tension in the air and you have to intervene.
- I appreciate it and you are welcome to stay, but he is right, Dimitri is my baby sitter this time.
- I understand you already have your support, but it would ease my mind if I could stay by your side. This way I can protect you and observe the way you lead your men. If needed I will assist in battle of course and like I said before in the meeting; you can use my men as if they are your own. As I wish you will see them one day.
-I… Thank you your Highness…- Dimitri was scowling and you could tell he was beginning to get angry.
-Were we not on first name terms _____?
-I apologize for interrupting, but I was wondering if his Highness would help me out.- The voice came from behind Hrid. It was Charlotte. Her huge soulful eyes were fixed on Hrid.Her voice was all sweetness and her demeanor bashful and coy. To her side Groom Marth stood looking at Dimitri.- Your sister said you could help me.
<<Oh Thanks GOD! I could kiss Fjorm right now!>>
-Oh Hrid this is Lady Charlotte of Nohr. She is a trusted friend and ally.- It had taken a while to warm up to her after the incident with Alfonse. He had to explain to her, in the coldest of voices that he was not interested in her in any sort of way and that, what she was doing was harassment and it was punishable in Askr. Prince Xander had been called as well and he had been even less lenient. After working with her you found out she was actually pretty cool when she was not obsession with someone. You even gave her pointers on what she was doing wrong with guys. Everyone knows guys do not like desperate women and she radiated desperation.
-I would help her, but I am afraid I am not tall enough.- Says Marth. Hrid excuses himself and goes to help Charlotte. You can tell he is very annoyed by the redness on his cheeks and ears. Charlotte turns to you and winks. Marth gives you a small smirk and asks if he can talk to Dimitri. They both leave to where King Dimitri is waiting for them. As soon as they leave, you feel someone tap you in the back. You turn around and King Claude takes a finger to his closed mouth and signals for you to follow him.
- Please tell me I am not as persistent and annoying as that man!- He says in a quiet hiss. You walk a little into the wooded area by the road and see a figure dressed in white waiting for you.
-Thank you Claude. I owe you. And for the record. You are not annoying at all and I enjoy spending time with you.
-Then minutes Alfonse. Make the best of it.- Claude says and winks. You turn around and Alfonse is blushing.
He walks up to you and takes your hand. He says nothing but his eyes speak volumes. His other hand comes up to your face and caresses your cheek. You lean into his touch and close your eyes. He kisses your forehead and then embrace you. You circle his waist as he cradles your back and head.
Meanwhile King Dimitri, Savior King Dimitri and Marth are talking to Fallen Dimitri. F Dimitri had gone to ask them what was happening to you and what was the deal with the king of Nifl. K Dimitri and G Marth had weighted the options of telling F Dimitri what they knew. They decided to tell him about the treaty and that he should be patient and threat the King with respect so that Askr could gain the aid they will need if they were to be attacked by another kingdom. They will tell him about the engagement after Hrid leaves.
-Yes. Apparently he is interested in building a relationship ending in marriage with her, but we all know she is not interested in anyone but Prince Alfonse. Still, we have to be careful and polite with him.- Explains Marth.
-Fine ,but if he so much as breathes wrong, her way I will cut his head off.- He is about to go when he is stopped by his other self.
-It is not wise to project your feelings towards her. She will not return them. Better men than us have tried and failed. She wants only to help you and it will only hurt you both.- Says King Dimitri.
-I understand who her heart belongs to and I would not come between them.- He wondered if any of them had seen the way you looked at Lif, or had seen how much you love each other, or if they only knew about Alfonse. The way he saw it; he knew better than any of them who your heart belonged to. Divided as it was.
Dimitri found you talking to Alfonse just at the edge of the forest by the road you were taking; but he did not approached you. You were looking at a map, but seemed to be talking about something else. He spied Hrid talking to the blonde girl who wanted to marry a rich man. Her charms were being neglected by the prince who kept scowling and sending you furtive looks. Dimitri could hear you talking thanks to his finer sense of hearing.
-Can we talk about that after the battle?- You ask Alfonse. He scowls.
- What did he do? Did he hurt you?
-What? No! He refused our help, just like you said he would. He left…for good this time.
- There is more.
-We should focus on the battle ahead. I don’t want to mess up something important because our head is in another matter.- Alfonse closes his eyes. He is loosing his patience and probably thinking there was something worst than what actually happened. You sigh.- I wanted to wait until later to tell you. The truth is just that, he refused our help, said he could never be my friend and that even if he agreed to be helped, he doesn’t believe we can help him. He showed me his face…then kissed me. - Alfonse palled and rubbed his face. He looked annoyed but at the same time relieved.- I did not tell him about my “memories”. I don’t know what he would do, if what we think happened to me, is real.- Alfonse looked even more relieved by that. Dimitri wondered what that meant.
-We will talk about this when we get home. Hrid will be your guard today. He asked Commander Anna. -His jaw muscles were moving with tension.
- Goddammit! Well so will Dimitri. I am not changing my plan. He is lucky I did not choose Grima. I’m being nice here Alfonse…a good girl Alfonse.- You smile coyly at him and at first he is confused, but you see him redden. He has no idea of your real meaning, but just looking at you giving him that look is enough to make him melt. He knows you are flirting, but he does not know the context. He is about to say something when you both hear Anna give the command to start the march.
After a meal brake, Fjorm comes to talk to you.
-_____. I heard my brother has asked to be your body guard. You have to deny him.- You look at her confused.- _____ remember our traditions. If he saves your life or Alfonse’s; you will owe him a life debt. I…do not understand him. I would not have thought him capable of using something like this or even demanding it of you, but he seems so different. I am not sure if it is because he has been alone without mother and Gunthra to guide him or something, but he looks different. I am just doing this as a precaution. I swear to you he is a good man and a honorable one, but I also know that he is stubborn and will fight for what he wants and what he thinks is best.
-I believe you Fjorm. I actually like him as a person. I just can’t help be angry at his ideas and the outcome of his requirements for the treaty. I will appeal to his warrior pride and make him be in the battlefield, just not close to Alfonse or Sharena. Deal?- She smiles and blushes when you take her hand in yours.
That night there is no time to put tents up. You put your roll up by Sharena and Fae who sleeps between you and Grima. You have noticed Grima had given the small dragon some of the candy you had given him. Fae is slowly becoming a younger sister of sorts to him. She started following him around and he let her after he was told she was alone in the world and had been isolated for a long time. She had been well taken care of, but had no living family. Although she had people who loved her and knew some half dragons, she was immediately drawn to Grima after she had heard of how he had been treated and how he had been isolated and alone. She had told you she wanted to help him. They were both alone.
You were awaken by a soft voice.
-The family has grown.- Alfonse’s smiling face is looking down at you from his sitting position by your head. You look around to find Fae had moved to Grima’s side and some time in the night, young Tiki had laid down on his other side.
<<OMG! What do I do?!>> You did not want Grima to wake up to find her there and get angry. You look at Grima and see that his eyes are open. He moves his hand from under Tiki’s head just a bit and signals you to not make a noise. <<Oh OK then..>> He closes his eyes again.
-Care to patrol with me?- Alfonse asks and you get up to join him. Hrid had, had the last watch and was sleeping now. You would be leaving in a few hours and arrive at the keeps before twilight.
-I guess it has grown. I wonder why the dragons just leave their kids so young wander around in the world, all alone like that.
-They probably have their reasons to do it.- He says quietly. You were thinking of arguing your point but remember that he himself was not as close to his parents and had had a more or less lonely childhood. If it wasn’t for Sharena he would have been much more of a loner. You decide to change the subject.
-Free for some hours then?- You ask. He looks back to where Hrid is laying asleep by his sisters.
-At last. Care for a tea after the patrol?- He asks you smiling. You take his hand and look him in the eyes.
-I’ll be happy to.
You do the patrol and drink some hot water since you could not find the tea. You talk for a while and fall asleep together sitting by the fire. This is where F Dimitri finds you to wake you up to re start the journey.
The second day goes on just like the first. Hrid comes often to talk to you and more often than not some heroes come to take you away for one reason or another. You walked alongside K Claude mostly and Grima who was followed by young Tiki and Fae. At some point Hero King Marth came to walk alongside and carried a sleepy Tiki who had placed a flower on his tiara. Fae pouted until Grima carried her as well. You looked back one time to find Chrome watching longingly at them.
You arrived past midday to the Keeps and after you help them all to settle and then seek Hrid out. You did not notice Alfonse had followed you and stayed in the shadows to wait for you.
-Hrid. I wanted to talk to you.
-Oh?
-You see… I don’t know how to say this… It is just, I wanted to ask you something. -He he looks at you expectantly with a small smile adorning his face. You also try not to sound flirty but keep it as interested.- I was thinking back at the time we found you in Muspell and remembering how you were fighting. Well the reason I was reluctant for you to be my guard was that I was curious about your style and I wanted to see more of it.
- Oh! I see. I was desperate and not at my best.
-Being desperate to save a loved one is probably when people are at their best in my opinion. Maybe not technique wise but at least morally.- He reddens and bites his lower lip a little.
-I would love to show you my style. Where do you want me?
<<Is he…?>>
-Umm. I was thinking of placing you, if you are alright with it of course; on the right flank, by Lord Seliph. That way you are in the fray and still close enough.
-It sounds good to me.- He says.
- We can talk about it after the battle. - You say because you knew he would want to hog the time again and because now at least you had something to talk about that does not sound awkward to you.
You attended the meeting with the Royal Army Officers. Alfonse had sent a messenger before hand to warn them. They had arrived some two hours before you.The plan was laid out for the officers and and after some debate it was approved. The Royal Army was very set in their ways and your suggestion on an ambush by militia attacks was taken with skepticism. You had met this kind of drawback before and it was always smoothed over by the heroes and Alfonse. The later had avoided your gaze every time you had asked for his opinion and you notice he looked angry. He had stood as far away as possible from you. Meanwhile Hrid had stood next to Claude which was as close to you as he could get.
As soon as the meeting was over, you sent out the mages and scouts to set up confusion wards in case enemy scouts came and saw you already there. Then mines were placed by the mages for when the enemy arrived. Not explosive mines but paint. The paint was magic and it help to immobilize , by temporally blind and confuse the enemy warriors; giving you precious time to attack them or retreat as needed. They also had the side effect of giving people hives. You seek out Alfonse to talk to him. You find him in the armory.
-Alfonse. I need to talk to you.- He does not turn to you and keeps on checking his gear and weapons. He looks like he wants to ignore you.
- I have no time. We can do this after the battle…unless you have someone to talk to later instead?
<<???>>
-Yeah… I promised Hrid we would talk about his sword style and technique…and that is what I need to talk to you about.
-I need to go check on the men.
-It will be just a minute…why are you so angry any way?
-What do you mean angry? Why would I be angry? Did you do something to anger me?
-I don’t think so…Look any way; Fjorm came and told me not let Hrid be my guard…- He looked at you now.- because she did not want him to save me or something and then I would owe him a life debt.
-What? He wouldn’t dare...- Now he looks even angrier.
-Yeah she doesn’t believe that either, but she says he looked different in a way and it is a “just in case” kind of thing, so I went to talk to him and ask him to fight. I was afraid for you as well as Sharena. It is better neither of us owe him something. - He nods. He still looked annoyed but at least he did not radiated that miasma of doom he does when he is really angry.
- I.. heard you talking to him.
-Oh! So that is why…Oh Alfonse!- You look around to see if someone is watching and take his hand. He leads you a little away until he finds a small door that he opens and you find yourself in a small closet full of weapon polishing products.
-I’m sorry I should have told you I was going to do that, but I didn’t found the time with so much stuff to do.
-No…I should not be jumping to conclusions. It is just…- He suddenly hugs you and kisses you on the forehead.- I…I love you so much…- He lowers his face and is about to kiss you. You feel like the butterflies in your stomach are having a party in there.
(Knock, knock)
-You two. It’s time to go!- Alfonse jumps back at the sound of Niles’ always suggestive words. You open the door and frown at him. Niles looks around inside the closet and smirks.- So…how was the sword polishing?
<<Oh I wish Niles!>> You roll your eyes at him.- We were only talking. You look back at Alfonse but he is looking down at his feet. You have never seen him look so guilty before. <<Adorable!>>
-Just talking huh…I love “just talking” with people inside closets too.
-Oh I wish Niles, but you went ahead an ruined it by knocking at the door. Besides we were in there for only like thirty seconds! Oh wait…Is that how long you “talk to people in closets”?
-______!!- Comes Alfonse’s voice behind you.
-.…Oh you got me good Summoner!- He says and starts laughing out loud.- I forget you are not afraid to use that tongue.
<<Oh Niles if only you knew… That’s exactly what I was trying to do.>> He looks at your face sees that little smirk and he just knows and laughs harder.
-Don’t worry your Highness. I am an expert at keeping secrets. I would give you fifteen minutes but we really need to go.- Alfonse comes out after you and his face is redder than a tomato.
-Wait. Let me fix your cloak.- He stops and lets you fix his scarf part of the cloak. You linger around his neck and then pass your fingers through the locks of hair loose from his crown. He is looking at you and you see his lips part and look at your lips for a second. His tongue comes out slowly to lick at his lower lip. The moment is so intimate Niles turns around to give you privacy and for once keeps quiet.
-You look good.- You tell him and his cheeks redden a little more.- Let’s go.- You say and both of you follow Niles out of the armory to Anna who is waiting for you.
~*~
The Emblian Empire attacked at midnight. The Askrn forces had let them get close to the bait, which was the keep where the the town people were hiding. Then the militia attacks were started in the enemy rear. Your surprise attack was successful and when they tried to retreat the mines enclosed them in where the men were not stationed. The battlefield was alight with fires suddenly burning, this way you could see where the heroes were and what they were doing.
From your position on one of the highest hills outside of town you could send the signals to the men and not be reached by enemy fire. King Savior Dimitri was by your left side monitoring the danger and the rear. Waiting for the moment he had to act.
Although you had smoother over the problem with Alfonse, he seemed still to be in a bad mood. He fights with the same skill as ever, but you could see there was something else in there. The same quality to his strikes that Lif had in his…like he really wanted to hurt something.
-Beruka tell Innes there’s an enemy sniper hiding far to his right flank over the tallest tree. - You mouthed over to Beruka who could read your lips. She nodded and before taking of to warn Innes.
Once in a while you look over to Hrid to check on his team and actually evaluating him so you would have something to talk about later on.
Next is Valter whom you had told to stay and rest after being on that hunt he went on. He seemed just as efficient, but there was a slowness to his strikes that if not corrected could end in a bad situation. You touch your medallion and say his name. It would let him know you are watching him or have something to tell him. He turns to you after making sure there is no danger.
- Are we the prey or are we the hunter?- That did it for him. No one would call him prey. He seemed to regain vigor, speed and strength.- Good. That’s my hunter boy.- You could hear Azura and Shigure singing over the noise. You turn to watch the others. Michaelis, Minerva, Seliph, Olivia,Eliwood and Roy, Hector, Rath , Eirika, Lyon and Ephraim…
You take your spyglass to watch the farther part of the field and spy on Xander, who is the leader of the Emblan army. He is watching you it seems, so you wave at him. He lowers the spyglass and for a second it looks like he is about to wave back but thinks better of it. This makes you chuckle. That man is actually a good man and you could understand his position. He not only kept Veronica company and keeps the vultures that try to make her their puppet away from them, but he had smoothed out some problems that could have escalated without his help. Without him the war would be worst and who knows where Veronica would be or what she would be doing. He kept her human.
Then from the North Eastern side of the Keep the flank breaks and reinforcements pour in. You knew about them and were prepared for them, that was what the mines were for. What you were not prepare for, was one of the heroes in the enemy lines. Adrestian Emperor Edelgard, dressed in her Reds and golds armor lead the reinforcements. You hear a hiss from S K Dimitri at the same time you feel your medallion warn you. It was Alfonse. You turn to watch him but you know full well what he meant. He points to F Dimitri. He has isolated himself as he always does. His backup Marth, is blocked form getting to him by a couple of lancers. Alfonse made his way to him, but before he reached him Dimitri looked up. It seemed like he could hear orders being given and recognized the voice.
Dimitri saw Edelgard and he froze for a second. Then he started to walk her way and he looked like he was not paying attention to his surroundings. Alfonse started to make his way towards him and so did Marth. You signal King Claude who is near by covering Alfonse, but he had already seen the scene unfolding. He started felling the enemies that were about to hit Dimitri. You signal Dimitri himself. At last he seems to react, but instead of returning your call, he started to relentlessly and brutally kill the enemies on his way.
You hear SK Dimitri growl in anger. You reach for his hand and squeeze it gently.
You can see with the spyglass that Edelgard has taken notice of Dimitri. She stands for a minute watching him and you see her close her eyes. The face she makes is almost one of regret. She turns around, then signals something to her men and she starts attacking the opposite flank. On her stead another hero is sent. Death Knight.
-Oh FUCK… Death Knight.- You had seen him before. That man was insane and brutal. He did not listen to orders and actively has tried to kill your heroes any chance he has. You see him make a bee line to where F Dimitri is trying to follow Edelgard.
You see it as if in slow motion. Ferdinand came down on Dimitri even before Death Knight arrived. You had not even seen him coming. He drove his lance with enough force to behead someone and the speed to not miss. He had the advantage of surprise. Dimitri could not deflect or evade; but before Ferdinand’s lance hit its mark; a golden shield came up to protect a falling Dimitri. Alfonse had reached Dimitri just in time to jump on the way of the strike and effectively striking the blond out of the way. Alfonse almost fell down with the force of the strike and the effort not to step on the fallen blonde. He stood with his legs on either side of Dimitri’s upper body. Then the second strike came just as he was trying to gain his footing. The force of the second strike almost made him stumble and had him straddling the blonde. Alfonse could do nothing but shield himself and Dimitri. He turned to see if Dimitri was alright and his faces were inches apart.
He was about to tell him to get up when they heard a yell. Ferdinand was falling down his horse and an arrow was stuck on the horse’s flank. Claude was covering him while trying to keep from getting hit by enemy arrows. This gave Alfonse the time he needed to get up. Alfonse was standing up when Death Knight’s scythe came sideways and hit his shield on the side enough to fling it and his arm away form his body. He deflected the rest with the sword.
Sparks like fireworks flew from Folkvangr. Death Knight was poised to strike again. Watching from the ground Dimitri was struggling to get up. He was backing away so he could get up and not be on the way.
You watch it all from your post. Unable to do anything about it. You feel like the life is draining from you with every beat of the heart. Hel’s scythe; coming down slowly and yet so fast. Just like it had done for Anna and Sharena before. It strikes Alfonse to behead , but the angle and motion playing their part have another idea. The scythe misses badly. He is falling down…
-ALFONSE!!!!!
…..He is falling….he is …. outside the Order's castle in a training arena. You followed him to see him train. He is doing something you had not seen him do before. He jumps and twirls his sword to gather power and at the point of the strike there is a beam of power coming out. The attack is one of the most powerful you had ever seen. It may even rival Aether.
-Incredible…- You say behind him. He turns and smiles at you. His naked torso glistening with sweat. In another time he would he dying of shame from being found with so little clothes.
-Do you like it? I am trying to create something powerful to kill her.
-Alfonse that is amazing! How do you call it?
-I don’t know yet…I want to make a future for us with it. Maybe then we can end this absurd war and get married,- He gets close to you and touches your cheek with his fingers. - My beloved _______. He kisses you slowly on your lips and then kisses your forehead.-…I might call it…
-DOOR TO THE FUTURE!!!!- Your yell resonates over the cacophony of voices and yells of the battlefield. Breidablik lights up…
A/N
This program is messing up my grammar instead of helping, especially names. I have no idea how many times I have gone and fixed them. When I transfer it to the page it gets messed up again. I think it gets confused because I write in different languages XD
As a side note, I am trying not to make Hrid sound like he is an asshole at all. I like him a lot, but the guy is in love and is very possessive and jealous of Alfonse who he believes belongs with his sister and passes most of his time with you so…He just wants a chance for you to get to know him and fall in love maybe…and maybe…and maybe…
I have this head canon that if Valter ever hears Guren no Yumiya from Attack on Titan it would become his National Anthem XD. Bless Natewantstobattle and his covers.
Have you ever wonder why Lif’s face and original skin only covers his nose and his mouth seems to be lost and to have no bone inside?….yeah…I do.
1. The song I am referencing here is the metal cover by Dan Vasc:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bS4Q-WWyl3Q
2. It is said that Grima is 2000+ years but I seriously think that he can’t be that much older than Tiki was around the time of Shadow Dragon. So to me he is still a kid. A very neglected and abused kid who is lashing out in the worst way, because he is so powerful. I am doing this because I think that a gown up Grima would be more a love interest and I don’t want that in this story. Also I ship him with Evostrashbin’s Summoner. BTW I’m so happy Evo got Halloween Mr. Grima! I love it!
3. Crazy He Calls Me. Natalie Cole’s version. I love this song all thanks to my father. I choose it because I could see the co-relation with the story line and situation.
4. I mean. I get that the order is supposed to be the good guys but dressing in white all the time in battle? That works well in winter and Nifl, but that’s it. That Lord of the Rings cloak, the Lorien Elves gave The Fellowship would be awesome to have for the Heroes on more stealthy missions. Camo uniforms would also work wonders on the Order’s favor.
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babybluebex · 3 years
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all for you: prologue (loki odinson x reader)
➽ pairing: loki odinson x fem!reader(y/n) ➽ word count: 1.7k ➽ summary: loki, upon finding out that you are marrying a different man, bitterly tricks you into marrying him.   ➽ warnings: canon fuckery, angst, forced marriage, asshole loki ➽ a/n: enjoy!​
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I knew that the prince was nearby by the feel of the air alone. Even if Loki didn't carry heady mischief wherever he went, every Asgardian turned quiet and respectful around him. They didn't do that with the older prince, the heir to the throne, but Thor was a different man; less brash and playful and... Mischevious.
"My, oh, my," the young prince chuckled behind me, and I turned quickly to be greeted with his green eyes. "And why are we dressed nicely today?"
My cheeks burned. "I have an..." I began. "A thing."
"A thing," Loki repeated, clasping his hands behind his back. "Care to divulge what thing this is?"
"I do care, actually, "I admitted. "Because it doesn't concern you."
"Ouch," Loki chuckled and he pressed a hand dramatically to his chest. "That hurts, Lady Y/N. Does the word 'confidante' mean anything to you?"
"It does," I told him. The marketplace was bustling despite Loki's presence, and several older women cast small smiles our way. Loki was just approaching the marrying age and had yet to lay claim to a proper suitor, and everyone could tell that the kingdom was getting restless. Thor had chosen a wife earlier in the year, a Midgardian magician named Jane, but the kingdom was obsessed with love. "But this truly has no place in your mind, Lo."
"Give me a hint?" Loki asked. He stepped in front of me and walked backwards, his brilliant green eyes locked on mine. Just like me, he was dressed to the nines, his green cape flowing in the warm breeze and his boots clicking against the stone. I would even venture to say that his hair was washed. What a miracle for the young prince.
"Loki, please," I sighed. I still smiled, but Loki had to have known how annoyed he was making me. "I don't have to tell you everything. And I'm sure that there are secrets that you keep from me."
"Never from you," Loki said. "Does a thousand years of friendship mean nothing to you?"
"Loki," I chuckled lightly. "Don't press. You'll find out soon enough."
"Will I?" Loki smiled. "Is it a surprise for me? It's not my birthday."
That was one thing about Loki Odinson; once he got an idea, he never let it go. He would pester me until I gave up the ghost and told him what I was keeping from him, but my chest hurt when I thought about telling him. Loki was the marrying age, but so was I. I remembered when we were children that Loki always said that he wanted to marry me, but, in my mind, that was children playing. It wasn't anything different than the sword fights with sticks we'd have in the courtyard. Children's words during play did not a proposal make. However, the farm boy that came upon my father's doorstep and asked for my hand could be classified as a proposal, and I took it. I knew Loki would be upset when he found out that I was to be married at sundown.
"Loki, please, darling," I huffed. I shook my head and trained a small smile on my mouth, and I whispered, "Let it go. You'll find out soon enough."
"Right then," Loki chuckled. "If I were to ask my brother or his wife, would they tell me?"
"They don't know of this," I told him. "So don't bother. The only ones who know are me, my family, and... And Theoric."
"Theoric?" Loki repeated. "Who in Hel is that?"
I chewed my bottom lip as Loki stopped walking, blocking my path. "Lo--" I began.
"Who is Theoric?" Loki pressed on. "Y/N?"
I swallowed thickly. "He is..." I began. "The man I am engaged to marry. The ceremony is in an hour."
I saw a million emotions flit through Loki's eyes in that instant. The playful smile dropped off of his pink lips, and he mumbled, "Y/N. You're not serious, are you?"
"Deadly serious, Lo," I told him. "I'm sorry I kept this from you, I only did so because I knew you'd be upset--"
"Upset!" Loki cried and pressed his palm to his forehead. "Upset! Y/N, this is more than upset! Grief, is what this is!"
"At what?" I asked. "Just because I'm married doesn't mean that you'll be seeing any less of me!"
Loki set his jaw tightly, and he reached into a pocket of his jacket and extracted a small glittering thing. It took me only a second to place it-- a light golden ring with a green emerald. Loki's colors on a ring. "Oh, no," I whispered. His grief ran through my chest when the pieces fell together. He was dressed nicely in order to propose to me. I pressed my hands to my mouth and mumbled, "Loki. No, my darling--"
"Guess you can't call me that anymore, can you?" Loki said with a venom. "Lest your husband see you pining for another man."
"Loki, if I had known--"
"A thousand years, Y/N!" Loki thundered. "I have been in love with you for a thousand years, and you never saw it! If you had known-- Ha! If you paid attention, you would have known years ago!"
"Please, don't be cross with me," I pleaded, reaching out for his hands. Every inch of his skin was always cold, but I never minded. "I... I have seen it. But I mistook it for-for something else, because how could you love me? How could the prince love me?"
"Do you love me?" Loki asked. His eyes were brimming with tears, but I could feel his anger radiating from his chest. His eyes locked on mine, and I couldn't help but feel small. He had always been bigger than me-- taller and stronger and perhaps even smarter-- but he never used it against me. I couldn't remember a time when Loki has ever truly been mad at me, and I hated every second that I was under his scrutinizing gaze.
I sniffled. "Lo, I do," I assured him. "But... Differently than I do Theoric. I love you like--"
"Like a friend?" Loki sniffed highly. "A brother, maybe?"
"We were raised as siblings--"
"I was raised that way," Loki said. "You were raised to give me and my brother, my whole family, reverence without a second thought. Did you ever consider that I could offer back the same, even when I was told not to? Did it ever occur to you that you were the only brightness in my life? Years of being passed over, being told I'm less than everybody else, and you were the one to make me feel worthy. But that all means nothing to you, it seems."
"That's not fair and you know it," I told him.
"I am a god, Y/N," Loki told me. "The god of mischief, trickery, lies. Truthfulness and fairness are not in my nature."
"Well, where were you, then?" I asked. "If you wanted so badly to marry me, why did you wait to ask?"
"I thought I'd have time," Loki said. "But apparently the first man who asks--"
"Don't," I said. "Don't you dare--"
"Oh," Loki laughed ruefully. "But I do dare. Have fun with him. I know you will. But, by all of my power and the grace of the Allfather, you will regret this." His lips were a frightening sneer, and he stormed off back from where he had come from. My chest hurt and my heart thrummed against my rib cage, but I didn't try to go after him. Loki was incorrigible. He always had been. There was no way he would ever forgive me for keeping my engagement from him, and I felt tears welling up as I realized how quickly I had lost a brother. I had no true brothers, only sisters that had been married for several 100 years, and Thor and Loki were the closest thing to brothers I had. Loki had undoubtedly already written me off, and I knew that Thor was close behind.
I took a deep breath and adjusted my dress, and I continued onward.
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The ceremony was small and quiet, only my mother and Theoric's mother in attendance. Theoric was a nice man, a few years older than me, and there was a small part of me that was afraid of the marriage. I hardly knew him and I worried about our compatibility, but my mother soothed my worries patiently. She told me that the Allfather would not have given me Theoric if it were not meant to be. By that token, she said, our marriage was to be blessed by the gods. Perhaps not the god of mischief, though.
"And you, Y/N," our priestess said. "You take Theoric to be your wedded husband?"
I took a deep breath and clutched Theoric's hand tighter. "I do," I said.
"And you, Theoric, take Y/N to be your wedded wife?"
My fiancé smiled at me, his eyes sparkling in the golden glow of the setting sun. His eyes were green. I hadn't noticed it before but, upon second thought, I hadn't not noticed it. A bolt of nervousness hit my stomach like lightening; if I couldn't remember the color of his eyes, how was I to remember anything else? Anything more important? "I do," he said.
"By my power and the Allfather," the priestess said with a smile. "I pronounce you husband and wife."
Just like that, all of my nerves faded away. My rings were on my finger and my husband was smiling at me. Theoric placed his soft hands on my waist and pulled me close in order to give me the deal-sealing kiss, but I stopped at the last moment. I could feel his hands. They were cold; even through the fabric of my dress, I could tell. Panic filled my chest and my limbs grew prickly, and I pushed him away by his chest. "How dare you!" I cried, and I felt my mother's arms wrap around my middle. "How could you, you monster!"
"Y/N, please," my mother said quickly, tugging me away. "What's the matter?"
"You!" I started, my anger flaring in my neck and chest. Theoric, now my husband, gave me a smile, and his green eyes flashed a deeper green before a sparkling emerald mist surrounded us. "What have you done with him, you-you witch?"
"You see, darling," the man opposite me said. "I told you that you'd regret this." And Loki smiled at me.
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