#good clients know you're only human just trying to live

[godbirdart]

any tips/reassurance for when u have lots of owed art (comms, trades, etc)? i get stressed over making people wait too long sometimes with just a few things on my list. u manage to make SO MUCH stuff for patreon and personal work combined each year?? must be magic no other way /pos

let me start with saying:

people are [generally] more than okay waiting for art!

you are one person. you can get sick, have emergencies, and you also need personal time as well! you're not a company, and most clients are very understanding of that. there will always be the one odd client that's impatient, yes. it does happen. but as long as you are transparent, communicate, and [as a bonus] have a public queue - you really have no reason to fret.

i have commissioned artists that took three days to finish art. i have commissioned artists that took three months to finish art. there is no "standard" turnaround time when it comes to commissions. every artist works at different paces, not every artist is self-employed. some have school or jobs that take away time from their art, and that’s fine! it is okay to take a long time to finish your work! just be honest.

let me elaborate [i’m gonna say client a lot but these can also apply to trades]

be transparent: if you know it'll take you a while to finish the art, write that in your commission post and/or order form when you open. make that the very first thing the client knows before any payment is exchanged. i like to write it in my order form and in my first email back when i'm taking on a commission, as it covers my butt and keeps the client in the know.

public queue: set up a trello or make a post/journal somewhere [such as furaffinity or deviantart] where your clients can go and see the progress of their work. if they can go check where they’re at in the queue there, they won’t have to stress you out by having to send you an email every week for updates.

answer in a timely manner: i have an autoresponder set up for my email. it lets clients know that a) i got their message and b) i’ll respond to them within a couple business days [if there are no other delays / holidays]. it takes away the stress of having to drop everything and answer my client right then in there, as much as my adhd brain panics and wants to do that. it also reassures the client that their messages are getting through and that they aren’t getting ghosted if i don’t respond for a day or two.

if there’s going to be a delay, tell your client asap! if you have an emergency that’ll impact your work, tell your client as soon as possible. you do not have to go into personal details, just be honest and say “hey, there’s been an unexpected event that’ll cause a delay in updates. i will try and get an update to you as soon as i’m able. thank you for your patience!” and leave it at that. the majority of your clients will be understanding and grateful for the update.

be professional. a little professionalism goes a long way. you can be more lax with trades as usually you're doing that with friends, but if a client checks in to see the status of their commission maybe write "thanks for checking in! here's what i've got so far" and attach a WIP or "thank you for checking in! i don't have an update for you yet but will try and get one to you soon! thank you for your patience!". some artists merely say "i don't have an update sorry", and sure that does work, but it may come off dismissive to your client and they're not going to feel great about waiting. it's okay to not have an update yet when messaging people back! just be honest about it.

if you’ve bitten off more than you can chew: refund them. it's not bad business if you have to refund a client. if you find you've taken on more work than you can handle, or just cannot fulfill a client's commission - you absolutely have the option to simply refund them. be sincere, apologize for their time, thank them for considering you, and tell them you hope they'll consider commissioning you again in the future.

i hope this reassures you a bit! i 100000% understand the stress from making people wait in the queue for a long time. i’m the exact same way!! but rest assured they’re not going to get mad at you for having to wait. like i’ve already said multiple times; just communicate and be transparent and you’ll be fine!

#and ye nightmare clients sadly DO Happen #but they aren't that common #good clients know you're only human just trying to live

[wake-me-up-inside-imagines]

Ok, I just read your sweet yandere post and would like to add something.

I love the idea of like a mafia boss yandere or someone who is usually cruel (like maybe a Hades sort of character) but is an absolute sweet heart to their darling. One of my fave tropes

OOOOOOH I LOVE THIS TROPE! I have a character who's just like this actually, a total sweetheart to whoever he's with but has a very low tolerance for most other people.

Sorry, this is a long one lol

I'm gonna make headcanons now because you've inspired me lol.

(Banner/divider credit goes to @cafekitsune)!

Tw: Kidnapping, mentions of violence

Mafia boss! Charlie who is no stranger to violence. He's lived his entire life surrounded by it, in fact. Having a mafia boss for a father will do that to you, he guesses.

Mafia boss! Charlie who's spent his whole life working for the mafia, being trained to kill, smuggle, and deal ever since he was a child. He grew up living a life of crime, rising up the ranks (thanks to his father), before taking over as the boss when his father was killed by an unruly client.

Mafia boss! Charlie who's a cruel, ruthless man. He's killed dozens of people, injured many more, and runs his organization with an iron fist. He may be young, but he's learned enough to know that any show of trust, any display of kindness is a show of weakness, a show of vulnerability. He can't afford that, not when he's the head of the mafia, so he makes sure to make it so that no one will question or challenge his authority by any means necessary.

Mafia boss! Charlie who has very few real friends, keeping those he does have at an arm's length. He'd rather die than admit that he craves real relationships, that he desires to make genuine, true connections with others. But he can't, so he pushes his wants to the side, reminding himself that his only purpose is to keep his business running smoothly, nothing more.

Until he sees you, that is.

Mafia boss! Charlie who meets you out on a grocery run one day. Your interaction is nothing special, at least to you, but Charlie can't help but marvel at how easily you make conversation with him while ringing up his items, how seemingly unfazed you are by his snappy attitude and unapproachable appearance. It's been a long, long time since he's met anyone unafraid of him, and those people are usually rivals who are too cocky for their own good. So this, this is new. He knows it's stupid, he knows that your tiny interaction shouldn't have mattered much to someone like him, but he can't help but feel giddy about the connection he's sure he felt.

Mafia boss! Charlie who, against his better judgment, wastes no time in trying to find out who you are. It's not hard, he has an entire organization full of trained trackers, stalkers, and informants at his disposal, and by the end of the day, he has your full name, address, social media accounts, family tree, medical records, and much more safely in his welcoming hands. He knows this is a bit overkill considering he only met you today and your interaction lasted five minutes at most, but now that he has a taste of real human interaction, he's addicted. He needs more.

Mafia boss! Charlie who quickly becomes awestruck and obsessed with you. His whole life, he's been surrounded by the craftiest, cruelest. most violent people imaginable, so to see someone, especially someone as precious as you, live a completely normal life, naive to the dangers he faces everyday? It's captivating! Of course, he can't follow you all day, he is a mafia boss after all, but he has enough people following you around and recording your every move that he doesn't need to! He's never been happier to be who his is than now.

Mafia boss! Charlie who thinks you're the most beautiful person in the world. You're a sweet little thing, too gentle and too unaware of the dangers around you for your own good. He loves everything about you, no matter how weird or embarrassing. He's content to watch you carefully for a couple months, but as time goes on, his need to feel our touch, to talk to you, to see you face to face is too much. He needs you. He needs you NOW. It doesn't help that you're so vulnerable and weak compared to him, with no knowledge of weaponry or stealth to keep you safe. What if someone were to try and hurt you? Of course, his goons wouldn't let that happen, not if they wanted to keep their organs, but he would feel so much better if he could keep an eye on you personally. Not to mention, every mafia boss needs a spouse, and some of his higher ranking associates have been hinting that it's about time he found someone...

Mafia boss! Charlie who immediately starts planning your "transfer" to his house, meticulously drafting out every last detail to secure your safety. He chooses his best, most skilled employees to carry out his plan, only the best for his darling, and sends them out to bring you "home". That day you come home from work, completely unaware of the people in your apartment, completely unaware of the sleeping pills dumped into your water while you weren't looking.

Mafia boss! Charlie who's ecstatic to finally have you with him, to finally have someone to hold, to talk to, to love. He brings your unconscious body to your new room, laying you softly on the bed while instructing his employees to pack up all your belongings and bring them to him. He doesn't tie you down or chain you up, he has enough security measures in place to make sure you won't be able to escape. You won't even be able to leave your room without him being notified.

Mafia boss! Charlie who watches the camera in your room as you wake up for the first time in your new home, confused and disoriented. All of your stuff is here, but this is NOT your apartment. Where are you? He watches as you start to freak out, guilt flashing through him for the first time in his life. He doesn't want you to be scared, he just wants to keep you safe!

Mafia boss! Charlie who sends one of his gentler employees into your room to explain everything, too afraid of scaring you even further by showing up himself. He waits a few days before revealing himself to you, when your terror has calmed down and you've become more familiar with your surroundings. He kind of just stands there, unable to formulate a sentence, which is extremely unnerving to you. You've been told you're to be married to a highly respected and violent mafia boss, and here he is, just...staring. When he opens his mouth to speak, your surprised at how soft his voice is, calmly explaining to you that you're safe, you won't be hurt. He reaches out his hand to touch you, but recoils when you flinch, not wanting to push you.

Mafia boss! Charlie who does everything he can to make you more comfortable and less afraid of him, getting you anything and everything you've ever shown interest in, giving you as much space as you need, and letting roam the rather large house freely. All you can't do is leave. He doesn't understand why you're still so scared, sure he's a criminal, but he promised he would never hurt you!

Mafia boss! Charlie who gets more desperate for your love as time goes on. He starts appearing in whatever room your in, softly talking to you about his day or about whatever you're doing, trying to get you to be more comfortable with him. Once you've gotten used to that, he starting slowly initiating physical contact, holding you in his arms like he's never going to let you go (because he won't). He tried his hardest not to push your boundaries, but eventually his need to be near you becomes too great. Rest assured though, he would never, ever dream of hurting you or purposely scaring you.

Mafia boss! Charlie who can't get enough of the feeling of your skin on his. He starts hugging/cuddling you whenever he can, holding you like you'll break if he presses too hard. He's always near you, cuddling up to you while telling you about how much he loves you, adoration shining in his eyes. He's the clingiest at night though, whispering sweet nothings into your ear as you fall asleep, him watching over you until he succumbs to his own tiredness. And his kisses? They are the softest, fluffiest thing you've ever felt. He cannot get enough of your lips, and he always kisses you passionately, like you'll disappear once he separates from you. With how loving and gentle he is, it doesn't take long for you to start loving him back.

Mafia boss! Charlie who starts giving you more privileges the farther you fall into stockholm. He'll even start taking you out in public on dates once he thinks there's no chance of you trying to escape him. He'd be able to find you if you did, he has many, many connections, but he trusts you won't. He loves going out with you and doing normal, coupley things with you, it's a nice break from his usual, violent life.

Mafia boss! Charlie who is insanely protective of you, never leaving you alone in a room with anyone except for himself. He knows how dangerous it is to be associated with him and now that he has you, he refuses to let anything happen to you. Any rival who attempts to hurt, kill, or kidnap you is met with Charlie himself, who enacts the most brutal, torturous death he can possibly think of on them. Nobody will come close to hurting you, he'll make sure of it. But no matter what happens, he'll always make sure you're far, far away from the violence. He never wants to subject you to the horrors he's seen (and done).

Mafia boss! Charlie who feels awful the first time you hear him raise his voice. It wasn't at you of course, he would never, ever think of yelling at his darling, you just happened to be in the room when he was meeting with one of his associates. It's scary seeing him yell, threatening brutal acts of violence on his own employee, and for the first time you realize how different he is with others than he is with you. He's quick to shut the meeting down once he realizes you're there, spending the rest of the night apologizing to you and assuring you he would never speak to you like that. This'll be the first time he truly opens up about what his job is like and why he has to be as cruel as he is, trying to help you understand why he behaved the way he did. It's difficult for him to make himself vulnerable, but he'd gladly to it if it meant easing your mind. From then on, he makes absolute sure you aren't around whenever he has to take care of business. He refuses to let you see him like that ever again.

Mafia boss! Charlie who never lets you forget how much he needs you in his life. You're the only thing keeping him from devolving into insanity, he wouldn't know how to handle himself if you were gone. He'll give you everything and anything if you listen to him and stay by his side, so please... please don't try to leave him.

Not that you would be able to, anyway.

#x reader #yandere male #male yandere #yandere #yandere thoughts #request #gentle yandere #sweet yandere #obssesive #obsessive love #obsessive yandere #oc x reader #yandere x reader #mafia boss #mafia boss x reader #yandere mafia #yandere mafia boss #soft yandere #tw yandere #yandere boyfriend #ocs #my ocs #charlie x reader #charlie craven x reader

[absurdthirst]

Immortally Human {Max Phillips x F!Reader}

Rating: Explicit

Word Count: 10.3k

Warnings: Vampirism, suggestive banter, oral sex (male and female receiving), vaginal sex, mentions of child planning, hypnotizing, sacrifice, witch's protective spells, violence, throat ripping, staking, gore

Comments: When Max falls in love you, a human, he must get permission from his sire to tell you about his true nature. When he tells you, he must turn you or kill you and you don't want to be a vampire. Leaving Max to protect you at the cost of his own immortality.

Co-written with @storiesofthefandomlovers

**Follow @absurdthirst-writes and turn on notifications to stay up to date on all new fics.

|| MasterList || Max Phillips Masterlist ||

Click Keep Reading only if you have read the Rating and Warnings and understand the warnings may not be complete to avoid listing spoilers. As AO3 says 'creator chooses not to use warnings'. You also agree that you're the right age to be consuming anything here.

“Babe! Are you ready?” Max calls over his shoulder from his spot on your sofa. He knows you are running behind, but the reservations are hard to reschedule and he pulled a few favors to make sure he got a table tonight. He has a very important question to ask you. “I’m coming, almost done!” You yell back breathlessly, making him grin as he checks his watch. If you had told him six months ago that Max Phillips would be in a committed, monogamous relationship, he would have called you an idiot. Laughed in your face right before he went about doing whatever he wanted. But that was before he had invited you out for a drink and fallen head over heels. Most who know him would call him egotistical. A frat-boy douche has been thrown his way several times when he’s smoozed his way into a promotion or stolen an important client. Business was what mattered and he was good at it. Leaving his private life a series of hook ups and perpetual bachelorhood until you had flipped his world upside down. 

Max was faithful. He was trying to be kind and thoughtful. Loving. Bringing you lunch or taking you out to dinner. Even sitting through movies he had zero interest in. Not because he was looking forward to getting laid after - although the sex is mindblowing - but because it makes you happy. Even though you don’t live together, he’s positively domesticated and is ready to take the next step with you.

When you come out into the living room, Max whistles. “Daaaaaaamn baby. Look at you. Looking fucking delicious.” He stands up and reaches for you, pulling you up against him to inhale your scent. He hears your blood pulsing beneath your skin and his mouth waters but he pushes that aside. Your relationship is perfect…except for one thing: you don’t know he’s a vampire. He hasn’t had the guts to tell you. Scared that you’ll reject him or be terrified of him and he only wants to see love in your eyes, not fear. He will tell you. He has to tell you. Max murmurs your name and you slap his chest playfully when he asks if you have to go to dinner. 

“Yes. It took forever getting ready and we need to eat. You can devour me later.” You say and Max waggles his eyebrows, “is that a promise?” You snort and slap his chest again but he catches your hand, placing a gentle kiss on the back of it. “Come on baby, let’s go eat.” He says and lets go of you so you can get your purse.

Hustling you out to his car, Max races around it and slides behind the wheel. “Hang on, baby.” He tells you with a smirk. “Gotta rush to get there.” He prefers to drive fast, in complete control of his reflexes, but you always seem to worry when he’s zooming through the streets. “We don’t want to miss our reservation.”

You grip the handle on the door and squeeze as Max rounds a corner too fast. “We aren’t indestructible. I don’t care if we are late, I just want us to make it.” You wince as the tires squeal as he accelerates and Max snorts, wanting to tell you he’s indestructible apart from wooden stakes to the heart. 

“It’s okay, sweetheart. You’ll be fine.” He promises and reaches for your hand that isn’t gripping the handle.

You snort in disbelief beside him and Max takes his foot off the gas for a split second, allowing the speed to go down by a few miles per hour. He still can’t tell you why he’s so confident, but soon he will. “I know you’ve been looking at the menu. Tell me what you want to order, baby.” He knows talking will keep your mind off his driving.

You snort again, amused that he knows you look up the menu beforehand and already know what you will order. You squeeze his hand, "I was thinking about getting the duck. It's not something you see on a lot of menus. I want something different. Then they have this Death by Chocolate cake that is to die for, according to the reviews." You say, and Max smirks slightly at your choice of dessert.

“Then that’s what my girl will have.” He hums as he turns a corner sharply and wheels protest again. He’s only a mile from the restaurant and the reservation is in five minutes. It means he will pull up to the valet in time to escort you inside and be seated. “And we have to have a bottle of good wine to go with it.” 

“I’m gonna need a drink after your driving, Phillips.” You chuckle breathlessly as he screeches to a stop at the valet booth. “Thank God we made it in one piece.” You exhale shakily as the valet opens the door for you. Max is there in a blink of an eye to take your hand and you are always so amazed at how quickly he moves and you take his hand to let him guide you into the restaurant.

Max winks at the valet and slips him a fifty. “Take care of it.” He asks as he guides towards the door. “Was there any doubt that I would take care of you, baby?” He sends you a pout and a grin that somehow doesn’t look ridiculous on him when combined. Leaping forward so he can open the door for you to enter the building and biting his lip as your ass shakes in front of him. At the host stand, he gives his name. “Phillips, party of two for seven o’clock.”  

His commanding presence has always turned you on and to see him like this has you eager for him already. You are escorted to your table where Max holds the chair out for you and you sit down. “This place is gorgeous. You didn’t have to spurge like this, baby.” You say with a slight tut, knowing Max likes to spoil you but you never ask for it.

“Of course I did.” He winks at you and sends you a small air kiss. It might look smarmy to some, but he adores you. “Tonight is special. And there’s nothing like spoiling my girl.”

You wonder if you've forgotten an anniversary or something but you've been with Max for just over a year now and every day he seems to spoil you despite your requests that he saves money - you are happy to sit down at home with take out and watch a movie. You reach for his hand after he sits down, "you're too good to me. I'll have to make it up to you." You smirk, stretching your leg to nudge his ankle.

“Hmmmm, I know you will.” His own smirk is knowing, loving how uninhibited you are and how you just want him. Not anything else. You are addicted to him and he doesn’t have to do anything more than what he does now. The waiter comes up and Max looks over at you. “What kind of wine do you want, baby?”

“Mmm I think red.” You say, having decided on the duck before even sitting at the table. Max takes the wine list and scans it, selecting a Cabernet and you squeeze his hand. “Excellent choice sir.” The waitress says and says he will be back to take your order. “What are you going to order?” You ask him, “do you want to get an appetizer? I think I just want to have the entree.”

“No, no appetizer.” Max decides, sending you a suggestive smirk. “I want to save room for dessert.” Waggling his brows suggestively, he knows he will have your thighs spread wide and his tongue buried in your cunt tonight. “I’m going to just have a steak, rare.” He decides, barely even looking at the menu, too busy staring at your beautiful face. 

You fluster at the way he stares at you. Still unnerved by the way he looks at you like you’re the only person in the world for him. “That’s what you always get. And you never eat it. I swear…you always make me take it home for lunch.” You shake your head, concerned about him paying for a steak and never eating it. Before Max can explain, the waiter comes back with the bottle of red and opens it, allowing Max to taste before pouring your glass. He takes your orders and leaves you and Max to enjoy your drink.

“To us.” Max offers, holding up his glass as a toast. “To our future together and tonight is the beginning of happily ever after.” He offers, giving you a sincere smile as he waits for you to react to that. 

Your heart flutters at his words and you clink your glass against his. "To us." You practically sigh with contentment. Part of you wonders if Max is going to propose tonight and that makes your stomach twist with happy anticipation.

Taking a small sip of the wine, he makes a noise of appreciation and sets it down. Much preferring to watch you until he can capture your hand again. “I love you, baby.” He starts softly. “I’ve never felt this way, about anyone, but you - you’ve completely changed me. I can’t imagine my life without you.” 

"Max." You gasp softly at his speech. He's a very physical lover, cocky with his words but never emotional. This is rare for him to say and you are shocked but happy. He loves you and you are so in love with him, all of him. You look down at your joined hands, "Max. I- I love you too. More than you could possibly imagine."

“I want to ask you something serious.” His brow furrows slightly and he squeezes your hand. “I want you to go away with me, meet my family.” He’s never mentioned you meeting anyone in his family and while it’s not exactly a proposal, this is serious for him. “Would you come with me to Romania?”

You’re surprised again. A little disappointed if you’re honest. You thought he was gonna propose. You soon gather yourself, replacing your slight frown with a smile as you tilt your head. “Your family? I- I thought you said your parents are dead.” You frown again and Max nods, “yes, but I have an uncle. I want you to meet him. See where I’m from.” You bite your lip and think for a second, seeing the desire in his eyes and how can you resist? You nod, squeezing his hand. “Of course I will. I’d love to meet your uncle and see your homeland.”

He can tell that you are disappointed that he didn’t pull out a ring and propose to you. Knowing that you are unaware that he has to get permission from his uncle - his sire -  to marry you, and to tell you that he’s a vampire. “I love you baby. I promise that you won’t regret it.” He leans in and presses his lips to yours. “He’s going to love you.” 

**** 

It’s cold when you land in Romania and you are escorted to the black car waiting for you outside of the airport. “How the hell did you deal with the cold when you live in L.A?” You ask Max when the car is moving along to your hotel. You’re nervous to meet Max’s uncle. You haven’t heard much about him other than Max wouldn’t be who he is today without his uncle.

“Jackets.” He jokes with a grin, although he really isn’t affected by the cold like you are. It’s one of the perks of being a vampire. “You need me to keep you warm, baby?” He asks, scooting closer to you and wrapping his arm around your shoulder. “I can warm you up just as soon as we get to the hotel if you want.” 

You giggle, turning your head to kiss his jaw. “I wouldn’t mind that. After all, this is our first vacation together. We might as well make the most of it.” You smirk and nudge your nose against his jaw. You and Max don’t live together. It’s been over a year of dating but you’ve never pushed it, knowing he might just want to do things traditionally and get engaged first. “When are we meeting your uncle?”

“Tomorrow.” Max knew that jet lag would affect you, so he had told Serge that he would bring you by tomorrow afternoon. He didn’t want you to be tired or less than your best when you meet the man who had turned him into a vampire when he was here in college. “That way you can get a good night’s sleep.” 

You snort, “a good night’s sleep with you around? I doubt it, Phillips.” You nudge him and he squeezes your arm, “I want you to like each other so maybe best if you don’t look like you got your brains fucked out all night long, huh sweet cheeks?” He hums and you smirk, “you say that now but wait until you see what I brought with me to sleep in:”

Max groans, rolling his eyes at the thought of you in lingerie. You love wearing things that make him feral to touch you, although he’s never shown you how feral he could be. Carefully keeping that side of him contained, so he doesn’t hurt or scare you. “So you want me to fuck you all night, got it.” He smirks. “Besides, it’s gonna be on the floor in shreds within minutes of you showing me.”

“That’s why I brought more than one.” You smirk and kiss his jaw, making him growl softly under his breath. 

****

“Max. This isn’t a hotel, it’s a goddamn castle.” You gasp as you enter the impressive abode, the drapery and stone imposing but warm as you step into the foyer followed by Max.

“Did I forget to mention that?” Max squints as he looks at you questioningly. Of course he wasn’t going to admit that it was a castle, he wanted to see your face as you experienced it for the first time and you didn’t disappoint him. “Sorry if it’s not romantic enough.” He pouts.

"Are you kidding me?" You chuckle humorlessly, walking over to him to wrap your arms around his neck, dragging him down to press your lips against his. Your fingers running through his hair. "I love you Max. This is - it's incredible. Where on earth did you find this place?"

“It’s actually…” Max sends you an apologetic look, “not a hotel. This is my uncle’s house.” He explains. “But don’t worry.” He assures you. “I told the housekeeper we were going to keep to our room tonight. They will send up dinner and we can just crash…or…whatever.” He hums, waggling his brows again.

You are a little taken back that this is his uncle's place but you don't argue it, knowing that this place is incredible and Max likely didn't want to make you more nervous. "Uh, sure. That works babe." You nod, sliding your hands down his back. "Of course there's a housekeeper." You giggle, looking around the foyer in awe. His uncle must be important to have a home like this. "I think I'd like to try the 'whatever'." You tease, sliding your hands lower to squeeze his ass through his jeans.

“Yeah?” He leans in, growling playfully and he scrapes his teeth over your pulse. Never allowing himself to let his fangs descend, he tortures himself with the alluring scent of your blood. “Come on, baby,” he groans. “Let me show you where we’ll be staying.” His sire has already had his old rooms prepared and he knows that he won’t intrude on the two of you.

You let him guide you through the impressive hallways, walls lined with portraits, and you gasp when Max opens  the large double doors. "Max. Wow. This is - wow." You look around at the large four-poster bed, the heavy velvet drapes. It looks like a vampire's lair and the thought makes you giggle. "What's so funny?" Max snorts after setting down your bags and you spin to face him. "Nothing. Just can't believe this is real. You are - I am so lucky to have you." You turn sappy, wanting him to know how much you appreciate him.

You slide your fingers through his hair, tilting your head to deepen the kiss and he slides his tongue into your mouth. You know you need to shower after the long plane ride so you pull back before it can get too hot and heavy. "I want to shower baby. Can you lift my case onto the table? I gotta find my toiletries."

“Of course, sweet cheeks.” He pulls back and gives you a little wink before rushing over to the bags. You don’t know about his vampiric strength, so it’s always fun to show off how strong he is. Lifting the heavy case easily and setting it on the table. “While you search for your toiletry bag, you want me to call down to the kitchen for anything? Something to drink? A snack?” Having a human lover means taking care of your needs, far more demanding than his own.

"Some water would be nice. A snack too. I don't know what your uncle likes or has. You know what I like so just pick something, okay?" You kiss his cheek, "thanks baby." You say as you rifle through your things for your toiletry bag and the bag containing your nightwear. You shower, glad to wash the hours of traveling from your skin, and after you dry off, you put the lacy little number you bought with Max's reaction in mind. You open the bathroom door and find Max sitting on the edge of the bed.

Checking his emails, Max looks up and freezes at the sight of you in the doorway. The lacy lingerie has his cock immediately hardening and he flips the phone out of his hand behind him, letting it land carelessly on the bed as he stands up. “Fuck, baby.” He growls. “You look good enough to eat.” He chuckles. “Fuck a snack, I want the whole damn meal.

You giggle at his hungry gaze and his hands find your hips, squeezing them, and you gasp at the strength in his grip. "Damn Max, you're gonna leave bruises." You warn him playfully and he has a guilty look in his eyes that you haven't seen before. "Hey. It's okay. I liked it." You promise, cupping his cheeks.

“Sorry baby.” He’s a little out of sorts, being here. The scent of vampires is concentrated, seeped into the stones and you don't even know. He’s feeling more possessive of you, and his more animalistic side is simmering just under the surface. “I’ll make it up to you.” He promises, guiding you back towards the bed. “By eating your pussy until you scream.”

"Now that's more like it, Phillips." You let him lay you down on the bed and you look up at him as he shrugs off his button-down and exposes his chest. He's not chiseled but he's built, a strength simmering beneath the skin that takes your breath away. He slides his hands along your legs, making you stare at him, chest heaving as arousal dampens your panties. "I love you." You sigh when he kisses your knee.

“I love you too.” He’s certain that he does and he wants to prove it to you. He wants to remind you of how good it is between you before you meet his sire. Starting to shift to his stomach, he kisses down your thigh, inhaling the scent of your wet pussy and the sweet blood in your veins with a loud, pleased groan.

You whimper when his mouth presses against your panties, mouthing at your clit through the lace, and it's enough to make a moan escape your lips. Loud and echoing off of the stone walls. "That's it, sweetheart. Lemme hear you." Max murmurs as he pulls your panties to the side and you watch as his dark eyes meet yours while he drags his tongue through your folds. "Shit." You pant, toes twitching as he dives in.

Max had been good at oral before, but it was always given selfishly. It was so the girl would suck his dick or brag to her girlfriends about how good he was. So he could possibly bang them later too. This is just because he wants to. Because he’s addicted to your taste and sounds. His tongue curling up inside you and then coming back out to flick over your clit as he devours you. Groaning into your cunt like a man starved, he could spend all night between your thighs just like this and be happy pulling orgasms from you.

You whimper as he happily eats you out like a man starved. You can never complain that Max isn’t a giver with the way he licks your cunt for hours. You reach down to tangle your fingers in his hair and he growls into your flesh. His fingers digging deep and you know he’s going to bruise you but you don’t care, too caught up in the feel of his tongue curling inside of you, his nose pressed against your clit. “Fuck, Max. So good. Always so good.” You praise him, “love this. Love you so much.”

Max loves when you praise him, soaking it up and it makes him work even harder to pull an orgasm out of you. His eyes are dark and lust blown as he watches you, just shy of turning yellow in his desire.

You see that dark look in his eyes that he gets a lot and you love it. The hunger there makes your stomach twist and pushes you closer to your orgasm. He pushes his tongue deeper, curling it inside of you and you fall over the edge. “Max!” You squeal, thighs squeezing his head as you cum, soaking his tongue and you throw your head back as your orgasm shakes your body.

Max growls, the sound vibrating into you and he eagerly drinks down every drop of your release that you will give him. Loving how completely undone you are because of him. You���ve told him how powerful the orgasms are and he gets drunk on the pleasure he gives you as he strokes you through the high with his tongue.

You reach down to run your fingers through his hair, a lazy smile on your face as you melt into the mattress. “Shit. I fucking love you, Phillips.” You sigh happily, licking your lips and you beckon him up to you by tugging on his hair. “Want you inside me.” You request softly.

Despite the fact that he is hard and aching, Max takes his time to kiss you. Pressing his lips to your gently and licking into your mouth when you open for him. Not minding your taste, you kiss him back eagerly as he starts to slowly cover your body with his own and slide his hands down to lift your legs up onto his hips. “I love you too, sweet cheeks.” He promises when he pulls back, looking into your eyes as he notches himself at your entrance and slowly starts to push inside you. 

You moan his name as he pushes deep inside of you. "Shit Max, feels like you're in my guts." You groan in bliss as he nudges the back wall of your pussy. He is longer than any other lover you've had. You caress his back as he kisses along your neck, making you tilt your head until his lips are over your pulse. Unaware of the danger he poses as he scrapes his teeth over your skin. "Hmmm Max." You hum as he starts to move.

“You feel so good, baby.” He groans, pretending to pant because he doesn’t need to breathe. Sliding his arms underneath you, he pulls you closer as his hips start to rock fast and deep, making sure you feel every inch of his cock inside you . “Love you so much, you’re perfect for me.” 

You know you’ve never felt like this about anyone. It’s gonna always be Max. He’s your forever and you don’t know how true that rings for him. Your hands caress his shoulders as you lift your thighs a little higher, allowing him to sink deeper inside of you. “Yes, baby. Oh shit. I’m gonna - you’re - I’m close.” You tell him, amazed at the ability he has to make you cum so fast.

“That’s it, pretty girl.” He groans, eyes rolling back at the way your cunt clenches down on him. “Cum for Max, show me how wet you get when I fuck you.” He leans down and presses his lips to yours again. “I love you. Cum for me.” 

You moan into his mouth, unable to stop your orgasm from hitting you hard and your nails dig into his skin as you cum, toes curling against his ass as you clamp down on his cock with a moan.

He loves it. Moaning your name, he can’t help but fuck into you a little harder. Not too hard, he can’t hurt his little human, but enough that it enhances your orgasm and makes you squeal again. Max buries his head against your neck, hiding the way that his face starts to shift, feeling his own end starting to build. It only takes a few more pumps of his cock before he’s growling, pushing deep and filling you up with hot ropes of his useless seed. 

You sigh as Max fills you up, loving the way he relaxes on top of you, and you kiss his hair as he grunts against your neck. “I love you Phillips. So much.” You murmur, caressing his back and you feel his muscles beneath the skin.

“I love you too.” He turns once his face has morphed back to normal and presses his lips to yours, making sure that he pants so you will believe that is out of breath. He slowly pulls out of you with a groan and nudges his nose against yours before he rolls off of you onto his back so you can cuddle against him. “Didn’t tear this set.” He muses as he slides his hand up and down your lingerie clad back. “Must be tired.” Turning, he kisses your forehead. “Do you want to soak in a bath baby, or take a nap?” 

“Nap.” You murmur, shifting onto your side so you can look at him. “Definitely nap.” You close your eyes and you smile when Max kisses your shoulder as he leans over you. “Get some sleep.” He orders softly and you hum, knowing he will clean you up before he goes to sleep. He always falls asleep after you.

It never takes long for you to fall asleep after he’s fucked you. Watching you as your breathing starts to even out and before too long, you are asleep. It’s one of the reasons that you aren’t living together yet. You would notice that he never sleeps if you lived together. He could always pretend to have slept for the few nights you stayed over, but if you were constantly together, you would figure it out. You aren’t stupid. When he’s certain you won’t stir, he slowly shifts out from under you, moving towards the bathroom to get a washrag to clean you up. Smirking to himself when he sees the cum on the inside of your thighs and dripping out of you. While nothing could ever come of it, it makes him incredibly possessive to see it. 

Max sighs as he lays down beside you, watching you sleep, and he wonders what you are dreaming about until he hears his name across the castle. He can hear his sire calling him from anywhere and he groans, shifting off of the bed to dress and make his way over to his “uncle’s” suite. “Max.” Serge greets Max when he opens the door. “It’s been a long time,”

“It has.” Max admits, knowing he has not been back for years but he doesn’t apologize for it. He had been busy making his way up the corporate ladder. “And this time you have brought a human.” Serge’s expression is amused and he watches his protegé carefully. “The entire east wing smells of her blood. She is sweet.” 

Max swallows down the growl that threatens to make its way up his throat. “I’m assuming you’re here to ask me for permission to turn her?” He asks, knowing that Max needs the authorization of his maker to turn what some would call “his mate.” Max nods and stands straighter. “I’ll need to meet her of course. Tomorrow. I need to see if she’s suitable.” Serge hums, wiping some invisible lint off of his shirt.

“She will be suitable.” Max assures his sire, forgetting how abrupt he could be. “I- I love her.” He admits, knowing that Serge will take Max’s wants into account when meeting you. “She is perfect for me.” 

Serge chuckles, “I’ll be the judge of that. She smells delicious so I’m sure she will be sweet. She has tamed you, Maxwell.” Serge playfully tuts, “I never thought I’d see the day.”

He bristles slightly but allows himself to relax. “She has.” He admits. “She balances me out. Keeps me from being outrageous like I used to be.” He wants this to go well. “A perfect mate for me.”

Serge nods, “we will see tomorrow. I just wanted to see you when you arrived. You may go back to your human. She must be tired after all that traveling.” Serge says and looks out of the window at the moon that has risen high in the sky.

“Tomorrow.” Max nods and lets himself out of the suite to walk back towards his rooms. Hoping that Serge is impressed by you and allows him to turn you.

****

To say you’re nervous to meet Max’s uncle is an understatement. You know you need to impress the only family Max has if you have any chance of your relationship continuing and you focus on making sure you look good this morning so that Max’s uncle is impressed by you. You exhale shakily when Max calls you from the bedroom to let you know a breakfast tray is here. “I can’t eat, Max.” You admit, “what if your uncle hates me? I can’t ask you to choose between me and your only family.”

“Don’t worry baby.” He reaches out and wraps his arm around you to pull you close. “He’s gonna love you.” He nudges his nose against yours before he kisses you. “Please just eat a little? For me? I don’t want you to be hungry.”

You nod, kissing him again, knowing you should probably have something to settle your stomach. You reach down to take a piece of buttered toast off of the tray and bite into it, watching as Max prepares your coffee the way you like it.

“Don’t think of him as someone scary.” Max tells you, turning and handing you the coffee. “He’s just my uncle. I’m introducing the woman I love to him. He’s gonna be thrilled. You’re far too good for me.”

You take the cup and playfully roll your eyes. “Sure, Phillips.” You snort and take a sip of the coffee. “Says the man who brought me to a fucking castle.” Max chuckles and you set the coffee down after finishing it. “Okay let’s go.” You brush yourself down and try to ignore the hammering of your heart as you prepare to meet Max’s uncle.

Max holds your hand after leaving the suite, wanting to reassure you. “You look beautiful today, but you look beautiful everyday.” He compliments, lifting your hand up to kiss the back of it. “We are going to meet Serge in the drawing room. Nothing too formal, baby.”

“The drawing room isn’t formal?” You snort and Max smirks as he squeezes your hand to guide you through the ornate house to the drawing room. You exhale shakily, unaware that both men can hear your heart pounding as you enter the drawing room to find a man around Max’s age standing in the room already. That confuses you. Unless he looks really good for his age, Max can’t have an uncle that’s the same age as him.

Max beams, guiding you close to the other man. Saying your name, he motions towards Serge. “This is my uncle, Serge.” He explains. “Serge, this is the woman I want to marry.”

Your heart flutters and you turn to smile at Max as he says that. You figured he wanted to take the next step bringing you here but to hear him say it aloud has you grinning from ear to ear. “It’s a pleasure to meet you.” You hold your hand out to his uncle who hums as he takes your hand in his. “She’s a pretty one, Max.” He says with a wink towards you, squeezing your hand. “Do you think she’d make a good vampire?” He asks and you can’t stop the confused chuckle escaping your lips.

Max doesn’t laugh, just nodding seriously. “She will.” He tells his sire. “She has amazing self control and she’s smart as hell. If you allow me to change her, it will be good for our coven here and in the States.” Serge cares that he chooses wisely when turning people now, the unfortunate fiascos that can occur when you turn too many has been a lesson learned over the decades. He turns to look at you with a proud smile. “She would be amazing.”

You turn to look at Max with confused eyes, waiting for him to say “ha, gotcha,” but he doesn’t and that makes you gasp. “Wait…are you joking? Or - or are you for real? Like- like vampires exist and I- you are one?” You ask Max, still waiting for him to burst out laughing and say it’s all a joke.

“It’s real sweet cheeks.” Max reaches for your hand again. “It’s the reason that I’ve not been able to move in with you yet. Serge isn’t my uncle, he’s my sire. He made me a vampire and I have to get permission from him to tell you about all this.”

You pull your hand away from his reach and stare at Max in shock. He's a vampire. He drinks blood. He wants you to become a vampire. You feel sick and dizzy and have a thousand different emotions. Your vision goes fuzzy and your eyes roll into the back of your head as you collapse.

That had not been the response Max was expecting. His inhumane speed keeps you from hitting the ground and he scoops you up to move you towards the sofa. Serge tuts and shakes his head. “Does she do this often?” He asks, unsure of how well you would take transforming into a creature of the night if you fainted at the news. 

“No. She’s shocked.” Max huffs, caressing your cheek and looking down at you worriedly once he’s got you settled.

“Well she might be shocked but you have two options now. Either she’s changed or you kill her. You know the sacred rule…no human can know about us. It’s one or the other and if you can’t make a choice, I’ll have to kill her.” Serge declares.

“I’ll change her.” Max promises, knowing that he can’t kill you, not when he loves you like he does. “When she wakes up and accepts what I am, she’ll want to be changed.” 

Serge nods and turns to walk out of the room, bored with the scene. “See that she does, Maxwell.” He warns his vampiric offspring. “Or I will destroy her.” 

****

You wince when you come around, the bright light hurting your eyes and you hear Max shut the curtain as you open your eyes properly. “Max?” You croak and Max kneels beside you.

“I’m here baby.” He promises and you swallow, your throat dry. “Here.” Max says as he hands you a glass of water and you shift to sit up. 

You take a few gulps and hand the glass back to Max. “I had the weirdest dream. That you were a vampire and you -” You glance around the drawing room and back to Max. “Oh God. It’s true. You - oh my God.” You choke, trying to back away from him.

“It’s okay.” He soothes you, keeping his voice low. “Nothing has changed. I’ve been a vampire this entire time and nothing’s happened, right? I just can now offer you one hell of a health plan, eternal life.” He jokes, sending you a reassuring smile. “I love you baby, and I want to be with you forever.”

“I thought - I thought you were proposing.” You choke and Max chuckles, “I kinda am. This is the vampy way of proposing.” He winks at you and you shake your head, “that’s why- you don’t eat. You don’t sleep. You - oh God. How didn’t I see something was off?”

“Because I didn’t want you too, baby.” Max reaches for you, wanting to caress your face, but you rear back from him. Making him frown, upset that you think he would hurt you. He’s never wanted to hurt you and he never would. “It’s okay baby, I’m still me. The same man you love.”

"I - I need time to think." You murmur, head hurting from trying to process that Max is a fucking vampire, and you struggle to reconcile that the man you adore also kills people. "I - what would - if you were to change me...what happens?"

“Well….” It’s good that you are asking questions. “You would be a vampire. You’d be extremely thirsty for a few days, but I will make sure you have exactly what you need.” He promises. “You’d have better hearing, vision, and strength. You wouldn’t need any sleep. You would be the best version of yourself.”

You bite your lip as you process his words. "What about...what about having kids? Would we be able to have a family?" You ask him. You had never discussed kids. You've tried but Max has always distracted you and now you know why he did.

“Baby….” Max sighs, blowing out a sound even though he doesn’t need to breathe. “I can’t have kids. I could never have kids. Not since we met.” He won’t mention that it’s because he’s technically dead. “But we could have our own version of kids. Anyone we change.”

“Oh." You sound so defeated, almost devastated. You have been so focused on your career that you always put the children talk on the back burner but you wanted the choice. Now that's being taken away from you if you want to stay with Max. "What - what would happen if I wasn't changed?" You ask and Max closes his eyes for a second, "I have to change you...or kill you." He barely breathes out the second part but you hear it. "If I don't, then Serge will." He admits and you nod slowly. 

"I love you. I do. So much. I- I don't know." You confess and Max knows he made a mistake bringing you here. 

"It's okay, sweetheart. I'll take you home. I'll - I can sneak you out and hide you. Serge won't find you." He promises and you reach for his hand, reminded that this is Max. 

"What would happen to you?" You aren't stupid, you know there'd be consequences. 

“I'd be killed but I've had a good life. I - you made it better than I could've hoped." He reveals and you feel your eyes sting at the thought of him being killed. 

"Max. No. No. I - I'll do it. You can change me." You tell him and he shakes his head, "I can't. I know you don't want it. I can see it in your eyes. I can't change you and see you hate me in a decade when you realize how lonely this life can be." He admits and you squeeze his hand, "I want it." You try to convince yourself and him, "don't you want to spend forever with me?" You ask, wondering if he's changed his mind.

“I will have spent forever with you.” He’s grateful that Serge had disappeared to do whatever so he could talk to you. “My last days will be with you. That’s all I want.” He promises. He knows he can’t turn you against your will and you don’t love him enough to give up your humanity. “Quick. We need to leave now.” He tells you, standing up and pulling you up with him. “I’ll keep you safe.”

"No. No. Max- I won't - I can't let you die because of me. Please. Change me now." You beg, pushing on his chest as much as you can and tilting your head so you can display your neck to him. "I can't let you die baby. Just bite me, now. Please. Before I change my mind and freak out. Do it."

Max loves you even more for begging him to change you to save his life. He cups your cheek and smiles at you gently, ignoring the panic in your words and leaning in to kiss your lips. “Go to sleep, sweetheart.” He orders you, looking deep into your eyes and hypnotizing you with his powers or persuasion. “You will sleep now.”

You collapse into his arms, passed out as you unwillingly fall asleep. Max carries you through the house, abandoning your things to prioritize your safety and he is quick to get into the car and drive you to the airport. He needs to get you out of Romania before Serge realizes you are gone. His sire has always had such a strong conviction to vampiric law and Max knows he won't rest until order is restored. 

Max keeps you asleep until he's laying you down in your bed and he pulls out his phone to call that witch girl who he fucked a few years ago. He needs a protection spell on your apartment. When you wake up, you're extremely confused to find yourself back in your bed and Max nowhere to be found. "Max?" You call out, throat dry, and you start to sob when you realize what he's done. He's going to be killed and it's all your fault.

Max has been listening outside your apartment door, waiting for you to wake up. Since the witch has placed the spell on your dwelling, even he can’t cross your threshold. A horrible side effect, but he knows he will do whatever he needs to keep you safe. He can’t even touch the door to knock. “It’s okay, baby.” He closes his eyes and sighs, standing back a few feet from your door. “You’re safe.” He hears you rush out of your bedroom and fling the door open. “Don’t step outside!” He barks harshly. “You’re safe inside. Serge can’t reach you there.”

You don’t cross the threshold but you stare at him with tears running down your cheeks, “why? Why did you do this? I- I wanted you to change me. Now you’re going to be killed. I can’t lose you. I love you, Phillips and I - I’m so sorry. I should’ve said yes. I should’ve let you change me from the get go.”

Max shakes his head. “I love you too, sweet cheeks.” He promises you. “That's why I can’t change you.” He shrugs slightly. “You want kids, and to grow old, and I can’t do any of those things.” He swallows harshly. “I’ll protect you. I’ll make sure Serge doesn’t hurt you, even if it means that he has to kill me.” He wishes he could kiss you one last time, but the kiss he gave you while you were asleep will have to do. “Don’t be sorry, and don’t blame yourself.”

You shake your head, "don't do this. Please." You choke, clinging to the door frame as you stay in the apartment and Max blows you a kiss, "I love you, baby. Be good." He says and walks down the hall, letting you know he's going to sacrifice himself. You sob, falling to the floor and you can't let him do this. You rush out of your apartment down the hall towards where Max just disappeared down the stairwell when the elevator dings. 

"Silly girl. He was trying to protect you and you just ruined his plan. Nevermind, it makes my job easier." Serge chuckles, speeding towards you to grab your neck, making you cry out. "Max!"

Max hears Serge, growling and whipping around to race back down the hallway. Fear and anger when he sees his sire holding you by the neck makes Max snarl. His face shifting and transforming in the truly horrific visage of his true self, eyes yellow and bone structure heavy. “Let her go.” He growls, wishing you had never left the safety of the apartment.

“You can’t kill her, Max and she has to die. She knows the secret and she can’t be left alive. Either she dies or you do and I can’t lose you. You’re like a son to me. Just let me kill the silly girl. You’ll forget all about her in a few years and you’ll find another human.” Serge scoffs, squeezing your neck a little harder and you reach up to grab his forearms.

“No.” The growl is low, furious as Max speeds towards you and his sire. Reaching out and grabbing the older vampire’s arm, he twists it to make him drop you, lowering his shoulder to push the threat away from you as he hisses, his fangs descending, deadly sharp canines on display.

You gasp, backing up into the wall as Max grabs his maker and shoves him against the wall in your hallway. The drywall cracks and Max growls as he manages to wrap his hand around Serge’s throat. “You motherfucker.” He growls and squeezes as he fumbles to open his jacket. 

“She’s worth this, Max? If you kill me, you’ll die.” Serge reminds him.

“I don’t care.” Max snarls. “As long as she lives, I can die a happy man.” Instead of tearing Serge’s head off, Max lunges forward and sinks his teeth into the man’s throat, tearing it out and then pulls out the stake he had put in his jacket. Plunging it into his maker’s chest, fully prepared to die to keep you safe.

You scream as you watch Serge explode, blood covering the walls of your apartment hall and you shake your head. “Max no!” You cry, scared that he’s going to die because of you. “Why did you do that!” You shout, “You are going to - oh God. Max.” You fall to the floor when he turns around and you see him covered in blood.

He’s getting a few more seconds. Seconds he doesn’t want to waste. Grabbing you, Max hauls you close to him and presses his blood covered lips to yours. “I love you.” He promises, right before the pressure in his body builds to the point where he screams.

You cling to him, uncaring that he’s likely to explode in a spray of blood. You want to be close to him in his final moments, the life he sacrificed for yours. “I love you.” You cry as he screams until he slumps down beside you. He doesn’t explode, he collapses onto the floor unconscious and you sob, reaching for him to caress his cheek. His bone structure is still heavy, depicting his true nature until it starts to shift under your touch. “I’m so sorry, Max.” You sob, leaning down to press your face to his chest, mourning the man you love so dearly.

Long minutes pass. His body is still and unmoving. Changing back to the body of a normal man and not exploding into a bloody pile of goop like you had expected. You continue to sob against his chest until a strange sound captures your attention. One that you realize you had never heard before despite laying on his chest after sex. A tiny thud. Repeating again and again until it starts to resemble something you never thought you would hear. A heartbeat.

You pull back, looking down at Max in shock, and he inhales sharply after several seconds, spluttering as he chokes on a breath. "Max!" You cry, thinking something is wrong until he opens his eyes. "Max. Are you - are you okay?" You ask, hands covered in blood as you cup his cheeks.

Max grimaces, his head pounding in the first headache he’s had in…..since he was turned. “I- fuck-“ he gasps out, feeling his lungs start to burn from the lack of oxygen. “I’m- I’m human again.” He whispers, realizing what all of that must mean. 

You are in shock, your palm on his thumping heart and you look at him. “Max. You’re human.” You gasp, helping him to sit up and you know he has to be feeling everything all at once. “Are you okay?”

“I feel like shit.” Max admits and after he thinks about that for a moment, he starts to laugh. “Baby, I feel like shit!” He repeats, aware that he’s never felt like shit as a vampire. “Serge must have known that killing him wouldn’t kill me.” He realizes. “Motherfucker lied.”

You caress his cheek, “you’re human.” You are in shock and You surge forward to hug him. “You’re alive. Baby. Can I - you hungry?” You ask, wanting to look after him as much as possible.

Max wraps his arms around you and frowns slightly as his stomach growls. “I- yes?” It’s more of a question since he’s only experienced thirst since being changed. “I- oh my god, baby, I’m human. I-“ he chokes up and buries his face in your neck.

You caress his back, wondering if he’s happy or angry that he’s human. “Are you- are you upset that you don’t have - that you aren’t a vampire anymore?” You ask, unable to believe how warm he feels beneath your touch. You’ve never noticed that before.

“I don’t care about being a vampire.” That’s true, he realizes as Max pulls away to look into your eyes. “I want to be with you. Forever, for twenty years, it doesn’t matter, as long as I’m with you.”

Your lower lip trembles as you stare at him with tears in your eyes. “I love you Max. I want to be with you. I would’ve spent forever with you but I’m happy to spend the rest of my life with you.” You promise, “I just - I hope you don’t regret this.” You sigh, leaning in to softly kiss him.

“I’d never regret you, sweet cheeks.” Max promises you. “But I’m starving.” He groans. “And I’m so fucking sore. And my head hurts.”

“Do you want to shower and I’ll make you something to eat?” You ask, running your fingers through his blood soaked hair. “And I’ll get you some Tylenol.” You promise, knowing that he’s going to have to adjust to human life again.

Max grins, leaning in and kissing you again. “I fucking love you.” He breathes out. “That sounds like heaven. And then I want it see what human sex is like with you.” He teases, happy that he didn’t become a Jackson Pollock painting and he gets a second chance at being human, with you. “See if those swimmers work now.”

You chuckle, “well I have an IUD. Didn’t realize it was a waste of time, but let’s go get you that shower.” You say, shifting to stand up. “I love you, Max Phillips.” You say when he’s standing up and you guide him into your apartment, leaving the blood in the hall to deal with later and you shut the door, guiding Max to your bathroom. You turn on the water and work on stripping off his blood soaked clothes. “I’m so happy you’re alive. I- I should’ve stayed inside. I nearly lost you.” You choke, cupping his cheeks once he’s bare before you.

“Baby, I would do anything for you.” Max reminds you, holding onto your waist. “Even die.” He chuckles. “But I’m glad that didn’t happen.” He admits, leaning in and sighing softly.

“Me too.” You murmur, working on removing your own clothes and you guide him into the shower. “Temperature okay?” You ask and he nods. You grab the body wash you’ve kept in your shower for him and you work on washing him, loving the way he groans when you rub his head. “My hero. Saving me. Sacrificing for me. You are incredible Max.” You whisper, wanting him to know how much you adore him.

Max hums, closing his eyes and enjoying the heat of the water and your hands on his skin. “You are worth it.” He murmurs quietly. “You’re worth everything, baby.”

You smile and kiss his chest, right above his now beating heart. You owe him your life and your humanity and you will love him until the day you die. You shift to rinse him off, working fast to clean yourself up. This isn’t sexual, purely comfort and you work fast until you are handing him a towel. “Get some sweats and I’ll make you some food. “Grilled cheese and tomato soup sound good?”

Groaning, his mouth practically waters at the idea of the simple meal. “That sounds amazing. Do you know how long it’s been since I’ve had that?” He asks. “I will eat anything that you want to fix happily.”

You smile, happy to look after him after he’s taken such good care of you. You quickly dress in your shorts and tank top and make your way into the kitchen to prepare dinner for you both. You are surprisingly hungry after nearly being killed and it doesn’t take long for you to have the meal on the kitchen table. “Max. It’s ready!” You shout as he comes out of your bedroom.

Max stumbles out of the bedroom, his headache still a dull throb and he’s actually used the bathroom for the first time in years. “It smells amazing.” He’s drooling as he sits down and looks at the deceptively simple meal. “Thank you, baby.”

You know it’s a big adjustment for him but you’ll be there every step of the way. You set the Tylenol down with the bottle of water and tell him to drink. “Drink, baby. Take some Tylenol. You have been through a lot.” You say and he follows your order, taking two pills and swallowing them before he digs into the meal.

It tastes so good that Max can’t help but moan and groan over the meal. “Oh my god.” He moans, chewing his bite of grilled cheese and taking a spoonful of the soup. “I could eat this everyday for the rest of my life.”

You chuckle, “you can if you want. Maybe we can go back to those restaurants and you can actually eat your steak. Or try something different.” You suggest, loving the way he’s enjoying the food. You’ve never seen him like this before. You finish your meal after he does, full and suddenly exhausted. “I’ll put this in the dishwasher. Go get ready for bed. I’ll be right in.”

It’s strange to be tired after years of not sleeping. Pretending to rest while he lays with you to make you think he had just woken up. Now, his entire body feels like it’s about to shut down and he still wants to touch you. He follows your orders and goes to get ready for bed, using the tooth brush that he leaves here.

You watch him come back into your bedroom and you pull the covers over, letting him get under them with you and you shift to pull him close, throwing your leg over his hip. “You have freckles.” You murmur, tracing his chest. “You didn’t have those before.”

He chuckles a little self consciously, wondering if the human version of Max Phillips will be exciting enough for you. “Yeah.” He hums. “I used to go to the beach a lot. Oh shit, I can be out in the sun for more than ten minutes again.” He realizes, eyes widening. “Can we go to the beach this weekend?” He asks excitedly.

You smile, “of course babe. We can go.” You promise and lean in to press your lips to his collarbone. “I’m so happy you’re alive. Vampire or human. I don’t think I could ever survive without you, Phillips. I love you so much.” You confess and lean in to kiss his jaw. “You saved me.” You murmur against his skin, “let me - I want to suck your cock.” You say, grinding yourself against him.

“Baby….” He whines, loving the idea. “Okay but you can't let me cum.” He tells you breathlessly. “I don’t know if I can stay hard. And I want you to cum too.

You nod, knowing that Max’s endless fucking isn’t possible now that’s he’s human but you don’t care. You love him more than anything else. You shift to pull the covers back, loving that he’s already half hard as you carefully pull down his sweats after he lifts his hips. You settle between his legs, spitting into your hand and you grip his cock, looking at those beautiful dark eyes as you lean in to wrap your lips around the head of his cock.

“Baby, I fucking love your mouth. It’s so good for so many things. Kissing me, sucking my cock, telling me that you love me.” He groans. “I want to tell you everyday how much I love your mouth.”

You moan around him, loving how he twitches inside of your mouth, and you work the base with your fingers, letting your saliva drip down to your digits. You groan when he grabs the back of your neck and you think he's going to push you further down his cock but he pulls you off. You whine, saliva dripping down your chin, "baby. Why?" You huff despite your cunt dripping for him.

“Want to be inside you.” He pants. “Want to feel you around my cock when I cum.” There’s enough time later on for him to let you swallow his cum. Right now he’s wanting to live every day like it’s his last and make sure you know how much he adores you.

You shift, pushing your shorts down and moving fast to straddle him, wanting to take care of him after his body has gone through so much. You reach down to grip his cock. "I love you." You murmur as you start to sink down onto his cock.

“Oh fuck baby, oh fuck.” Max groans, his toes curling up. “I love how you feel. It’s so, it’s so good. You're hotter. Wetter somehow.”

“You are hotter.” You tell him, “you feel - you feel so good Max.” You moan, caressing his bare chest to place your palm over his pounding heart as you start to move. You moan his name and he hisses when you clench around him as you start to bounce on his cock.

It’s crazy to feel lightheaded and out of breath. Feeling more now that he was human again. His fingers curl into the flesh at your hips and he moans your name. “Fuck baby, your so pretty.”

You preen at his praise, making you whimper his name and you rock a little faster. He is so soft beneath your touch and you never realized how cold he was until you feel his heated skin beneath your fingertips. “God, I love you Max. So much. Need - gonna make me -” You reach between you to rub your clit, so close to your orgasm.

He watches for a moment, obsessed with how you look. Then he’s slapping your hand away to rub your clit himself. He wants to be the one to make you cum. Loving the way you immediately buck when he takes over.

Your mouth falls open as you rock on his cock. “Yes baby. Oh shit. Yes. I’m gonna - fuck. You’re gonna make me cum.” You hiss, your thighs shaking as you grip his cock inside of you. Soaking him as you cum and you slump forward into his chest.

“Oh god, oh god, that feels so good.” He moans, wrapping his arms around you and sighing softly. He’s almost content to just stay like this but he wants to feel an orgasm as a human again so he starts to rock his hips up slowly. “I love you, baby. Nothing’s gonna keep us apart.”

You know there’s so much that could keep you apart but you’ll fight tooth and nail to make sure you spend the rest of your lives together. He rocks up into you and you get yourself together so you can rock down onto his cock, loving the way he hisses when your walls grip him. “Cum for me, baby. Wanna feel it.” You tell him, “wanna feel you cum inside of me.”

Max whimpers, eyes closed and he gasps out your name. Knowing that he should have died today, but he’s been given a new lease on life. “I love you.” He moans, thrusting up into you and painting your walls with his hot seed.

You moan, loving how it feels and you caress his chest as he twitches inside of you. “I love you.” You murmur, wanting to say it over and over now that you’re both safe. You aren’t sure how long you stay like that, just breathing each other in as he softens inside of you

Max’s eyes close almost immediately, his arms wrapped around you and he breathes you in. Smiling softly as he truly gets to inhale your scent. He might not have eternal life or everlasting youth anymore, but he has something much better, you.

#pedro pascal #max phillips #max phillips x f!reader #max phillips x reader #max phillips x you #max phillips smut #max phillips fanfiction #max phillips imagine #bloodsucking bastards #max phillips bloodsucking bastards

[hannah-banana-lou]

Resurrection

not the best at writing but i was on c.ai talking to bots... as you do. and got a really good idea for a fanfic!!

also pt 2 of come back to me will be up soon! i've been super busy with work and stuff sorry!!

Steve Raglan x Fem reader!

Content warnings! : murder, corpse, death, smut, paranormal, age gap couple (reader early/mid 20's - Steve/william early 50's)

This Chapter content warning: Age gap, paranormal, murder mentioned, death. MDNI!!! 18+ ONLY

Ressurection - Chapter 1

Darkness. Cold. Dirt. Buried. Gone.

A year has passed. 365 days. 12 months since he killed you. a bullet to the chest. bleeding out profusely. disposed of like you were a weeks worth of rubbish accumilating in the bins.

It took a while to accustom to your ethereal form, it has allowed you to stalk, observe, learn. you knew the world was big, but not to the extent you have discovered. there is so much humans don't know, things... entities... lurking, preying, living amongst them. you've filled your time with learning about ressurection. your mortal mind believing it was impossible, your enlightened mind welcoming the propsect.

it was rather simple. to be ressurected one needed to have access to their corporeal form. like a demonic possession. although, a corpse doesn't pertain consent. the obstacle opposing ressurection... most bodies are buried, inaccessable. including yours.

You find yourself sat across from your murderer, Steve. a man you once loved with all your heart. a heart that powered your vitalised body. It's late, he turns the desk lamp on, offering a warm glow to his office. His eyes focusing on client files spread across his desk, glasses slotted into his shirt pocket. you want to hate him, with all your being. you yearn to hate him but your mind wants otherwise.

You're nervous, fiddling with the engagement ring sat snugly on your finger, a ring that once was a symbol of the love you both shared. you had to speak to him, scared, apprehensive of how to do it. maybe it's best to rip the band aid straight off, just appear. no... how would he react?

you decide to just do it, allowing yourself to become visible from your phantom form. staring at him, the wooden desk seperating the both of you.

he notices a figure sat across from him, head shooting up, eyes widened as his gaze focuses on your features. the perfect picture. a snapshot, identical to the day he destroyed you. ruined you. He's frozen, mouth agape, eyes wide.

"Steve" you greet him softly

no response, like a frozen statue of your former lover in front of you.

"you're not hallucinating. it's me"

he stands up, looking around the room in a frenzy

"this some sort of joke? HUH? WHO IS IT?" his tone becoming panicked, angry. storming around the room trying to find a projector or some sort of strings, you're unsure.

"Steve. sit down. no one is in the office apart from you"

He storms over to you, swiping his hand towards you. a firm slap to the cheek. his lips quivering as if he was expecting you to be some sort of hollagram. a hallucination maybe.

"sit down steve. i wont tell you again" you command sternly

he nods, sitting down quickly, a thousand yard stare across his desk at you. "H-How... you're dead?"

"i am dead, you made that possible. i'm an apparition. a ghost. i can present myself to you"

you can see his mind working overtime, trying to comprehend the mere concept of the fact that you are sat across from his desk.

"... what do you want from me?" he asks quietly

you stare at him unsure of how to begin, fiddling with the engagement ring. he notices, staring down at your hands

"you.. you still have that?"

you nod. staring down at it before looking back up, meeting his gaze. his eyes roam yours, one of his favourite features about you were always your eyes. always shining. like a jewel. guilt washes over his form as he stares at you. your eyes causing memories to flood his mind. happy memories. sad memories. remenants of what once was.

he stands up, walking around the desk to your seated form. you stand up, height meeting his chest.

he reaches his hand down to your face, the appendage cupping your cheek, carressing the temporary skin with his thumb "i didn't want to." he whispers, his tone melancholy. "you found out too much for me to let you live. i hope you understand that. i loved you. i still... love.... love you. i'm so sorry. i really am. i miss you so much bunny"

he leans his head down, nose against yours, a small eskimo kiss. something you both did as a small sign of affection.

"i stumbled across it by accident. that wasn't my fault. and i told you... i told you i wasn't going to say anything"

he recoils his hand, leaning back up. his stern gaze returning.

"i couldn't take that chance now, could i?"

"so i just had to be added to your long list of victims?"

he groans. ignorning what you said, picking his glasses out his shirt pocket and situating them onto his face "what do you want?"

"a favor. call it what you will, but you owe me"

he sits back down behind the desk. you follow suit, across from him. he flicks his hand, gesturing for you to continue. resting his elbows ontop of the client files spread amongst his desk. chin resting against his hand

"i need my bod-"

"no" he interrupts you. "not a chance in hell. that is absurd, what do you even need it for?"

you huff. not wanting to tell him but you know no one else knows where he buried you. "you're going to bring me back"

"oh so you can go to the police? no. how is that even fucking possible? bring you back? that's crazy talk right there"

"crazy talk? as if me sitting in front of you isn't crazy enough for you"

before he can respond you protest. always debating and arguing something. an aspect he adored about you at times. apart from when he was on the recieving end.

"you took everything from me! i was young! i had my entire life ahead of me and yet i agreed to spend it with you! how foolish of me! you have had too long on this earth. you are bringing me back. no if's or but's about it. i will not go to the police." you spit out.

his eyes narrow at your angry protest. shaking his head. "no"

"please steve. please baby. for me" you plea, softly. hoping to appeal to the man who loved you under that hard exterior.

he stands up, closing the files and gathering them up placing them into a filing cabinet before turning off the lamp. "i'm going home. no."

he leaves quickly. hoping that maybe he was just halluncinating. locking the office door. brisk strides towards the elevator. scurrying to the home once shared by you and your murderer

you're left in his office. in the darkness he provided. this was going to take some work.

#steve raglan #william afton x reader #william afton #fnaf au #steve raglan x reader #dark fanfiction

[gyusimp]

°•Sex Headcanons•°

🖤 Requested by: @wildfire317s-oc-box

🖤 MINORS DNI | NSFW Content

≫ ──── ≪•◦ 🖤 ◦•≫ ──── ≪

Gyutaro is very loud, he doesn't care at all that someone in the Kyogoku house can hear him.

Everyone will think it's a client and that's it, but if someone snoops in your room or yells at him to shut up, he'll just kill him and continue fucking you in peace.

His thrusts are strong from the beginning, most of the time he seeks his own pleasure before yours so he will only move as he wants since your cunt is serving him.

It's not that he doesn't love you or care about you at all, just that he is a demon and love is not a characteristic that describes him but you know that. Also, he has a greedy and selfish personality.

He likes to try new positions with you. He lived his entire life within the Entertainment District and his mother was a courtesan so he's probably watched humans do it, you know.

If he sees something new or that catches his eye, Gyutaro will want to try it with you. He won't ask you, he'll just do it, but most of the time you end up liking it.

Gyutaro is a creature of instincts so during sex he may bite or scratch you to taste a bit of your blood.

Sometimes he just says what's on his mind so don't be offended by what he might say. Gyutaro will be very honest at all times and will say good or not so good things like:

"I love how tight you're today."

"Your juices are fucking as delicious as your blood."

"What the fuck is wrong with you? You don't move as well as usual."

"I already told you to spread your legs wide, otherwise I won't be able to enter into  your pathetic little pussy."

Maybe there are some insults too.

I love to think that after Gyutaro has fucked you with full force, 2 big bruises will appear under your thighs that were caused by his hip bones.

His stamina is infinite so he insists on another round every time one ends but if you can't anymore he'll understand. Gyutaro will stop but mock your pathetic and weak human body for a long time before going to sleep.

If Gyutaro is horny but you are not around him for whatever reason that will not be an impediment for him. He loves to jerk off so he'll do it whenever he wants, it doesn't necessarily have to be because you two are mad or he's not with you.

He always thinks of you when he does it so consider yourself lucky when he looks at his fingers covered in his own cum because he imagines they are yours (or your mouth, why not?).

He agrees with the blowjobs, never turns you down but secretly he'd rather give than receive. Gyutaro just got almost as addicted to your taste as he is to blood. There's not a time when the two of you have sex that he doesn't stick his head out between your legs.

Your taste drives him crazy so what happens when you're on "those days"? He will be after you like a cat in heat.

If you agree to do it during your period he will be the happiest man in the world but if it's something that really makes you feel uncomfortable or you are not okay with it he will understand.

But don't think he'll be nice, he won't say, "It's okay, sweetheart. Don't worry." He'll get very angry, maybe he will argue with you and during the days that your period lasts you'll not see him again (also because for him it was very tempting to kill you smelling of blood all day).

He just cums where he wants. Inside you, on your thighs, your breasts, your tummy, your ass, face or mouth.

I think that for some reason demons are completely sterile since the only way to reproduce is through their blood on a human wound so nothing will happen if you two don't use protection.

Gyutaro will be rude most of the time and will only focus on satisfying his desires with his woman, but there are times when he is the softest and most considerate, even a little careful.

If he feels sad, frustrated, or disgusted with himself, you always make sure he feels better. You flatter every part of him with kisses and that's how one thing leads to another.

If it's about soft sex, he'll be very aware of you. He will ask you if you feel good or if it does not hurt too much, if this position is not uncomfortable for you or if you already feel tired. His kisses are more fragile right now and you treat him like he's going to break. These moments are very beautiful but also very rare.

There are times when Gyutaro gets annoyed that you are a human (this only happens to him in bed).

He thinks that if you were a demon, both of you would fuck without any concern or care. Even if he broke your waist or he opened your legs too much, you would regenerate and nothing would happen, but instead, he always had to be taking care of your fragile body and taking care not to hurt you.

After doing it with Gyutaro, you felt extremely tired 95% of the time while he could go on all night. You gave everything you had and if only you knew that he didn't use even half of his strength.

Despite that, Gyutaro would never turn you into a demon for such a stupid and selfish reason. If he did, he would feel the same regret he feels with his sister because he loves you too much.

If you are the one who wants to do it with Gyutaro he agrees immediately, only sometimes he teases you to beg and makes you wait but most of the time he takes you to kiss and throw you on the nearest futon.

He is not ashamed so if he feels horny he will tell you. If you reject him for any reason, he won't care and he will just touch himself, but just like him, you agree most of the time.

If Gyutaro wants to be very kind and chivalrous with you, he will ask you if you want to have sex with him, otherwise he will just start kissing you and touching you, implying what he wants.

This man, although it may not seem like it, lives for you. Gyutaro is never going to tell you but behind all that demonic rudeness in bed is a soft heart that melts for you making him feel as nervous and excited as his first time with you.

Am i right, baby? @gyutaro-shabana-upper6 lol

I think that Gyutaro fits so well with "A little dead" from The Neighbourhood 🥴

#gyutaro x reader #gyutaro #gyutaro x y/n #gyutaro shabana #gyutaro smut #kimetsu no yaiba smut #demon slayer smut

[actual-changeling]

Do you think Aziraphale has been verbally, emotionally and psychologically abused by Heaven as well?

I will answer this question like one asked in good faith even though my gut is telling me there's a 50/50 chance it is very much not one.

So!

There are two parts to his answer, or rather one question is actually two.

Firstly, we have to talk about whether heaven is abusive, what that abuse looks like, and how it differs from hell.

Secondly, how did the results of question one affect Aziraphale, if it is different from what the other angels in heaven face, and what additional trauma might he have experienced due to being on earth.

I could write a 10k meta post about this and go into the finest detail, but I will just try and stick to the main points for now. It's still going to be way too long because I am so fucking tired of people accusing me of 'hating' Aziraphale or harassing me on my posts or in my inbox.

Is heaven abusive? Yes, and it applies to both heaven as an institution and the Archangels running it.

Getting to know Muriel and what their life looks like was extremely helpful in properly defining this, because they showed us that although the Archangels tend to travel and work as a group, most of the angels are incredibly isolated.

The result is complete emotional neglect, which not only impairs your ability to form and maintain healthy relationships with other people, it also stops your from learning emotional regulation and how to behave and feel as a part of (angelic) society. We see the consequences of that in Muriel, who comes across as overly naive, socially awkward, and out of touch with not just people but themselves.

When your entire life has been shrunk down to what happens inside your own head, suddenly being confronted with having to live outside of your mind is jarring, overwhelming, and foreign.

How do you talk to people when no one ever taught you how to do that? How do you behave around someone after a lifetime of being alone? How do your regulate your responses to their behaviour?

Who are you when there is someone else to perceive you?

Figuring that out is complicated and it takes time, and while most of the angels are only distantly aware of how humans live and what kind of interactions some of the other angels might have, the effects of that neglect stay the same whether they are aware of it or not.

Muriel shows us that angels are not born/made as a blank slate, and neither are humans for that matter. Tabula rasa as a philosophical belief is one thing, but reality is very, very different.

Angels also appear to have the same inherent need for connection, for a caretaker that loves them unconditionally, for someone to help them figure out how to be, and that provides a safe space to make mistakes. Without some or all of that, you grow up into a disregulated, socially awkward if not inept person who does not know how to have relationships or how to properly exist.

It is one of the reasons why autistic people are a) almost always traumatized to some degree and b) do not know how to socialize. No one ever works with our brains, and the resulting neglect is very similar to not receiving any help at all.

If you are now curious what happens if you're both autistic and were completely socially neglected, the result is uh. me. Hi! Not nice, but at least I am very sure I win the award for being my therapist's most fucked up client, so that's something.

Yet the angels are not solely emotionally neglected, the system/household they live in demands a low self-esteem, a lack of individual identity, and complete adherence to a defined ideology and behavioural pattern. In short, you are told how to be a useless, tiny part in a bigger machine, that your only purpose is to succeed at your tasks, and any opportunity for individual development is removed or destroyed.

If you are now once again curious what that might be like, uh, yeah, hi once more. Obviously my childhood was not exactly like an angels life, but the core characteristics were the same, just realized differently. Again, not pretty, really, really fucks you over.

Take that and the neglect, combine it into one person, and then drop them in the Garden of Eden—hello Aziraphale! Crowley got dropped into hell first, experienced more abuse, and then dug his way up into Eden before joining him.

Aziraphale experienced everything Muriel (and Crowley, and every other celestial being) also experienced, with one main difference: He is the one who got away.

We have to remember that out of every single celestial being, Aziraphale got the best deal. He did not fall, he got out of heaven (more or less) permanently, and was then largely left alone.

Does that erase anything I laid out above? No, of course not!

It simply provided him with the opportunity to heal, to take his cPTSD and who knows what other disorders he developed as a result, and start recovering.

Canonically, heaven did not bother him, like, ever, except for the odd note about 'frivolous miracles' or ten minutes of catching up every millennia. They only started monitoring him once they started to suspect he was involved with Crowley and trying to stop the apocalypse from happening.

Aziraphale worked on some things, he got better in many regards, especially with Crowley there to support him, but after six thousand years, many aspects have stayed the same or regressed back to the start over and over.

I will tell you a hard pill to swallow now: If you refuse to acknowledge your issues to instead live in a world of nicer denial and compartmentalization even when you have been offered the chance to change it, that is partly on YOU.

Is it fair? Fuck no! It's not fair at all, and I have had so many breakdowns over that fact. I did not break it, this is not my FAULT so why should I have to fix it all on my own? Why do I have to do the work, not them? How come they get away with it while I am going to have to carry this for the rest of my life?

I still have to do it though. I have to do the work, no matter how uncomfortable and exhausting, because I want to get better.

-

This conversation has so many facets and is a lot more complex, but this is already long enough, so if you have any questions or want to know something specific (while asking politely and in good faith) just send me an ask; I will do my best to answer it.

-

We are now only missing the last part of question 2, and that one is also so fucking complicated reducing it to the main points almost feels wrong, but I will do it anyway. Again, just ask if you have questions.

Abusive households are horrible, and you want to get out and away, but they are also the only thing you know. The world is scary, too big, too open, where did all the rules go that were previously defining your life?

Surviving in an abusive environment means you establish routine after routine after routine for every possible horrible scenario, you write a mental rule book to try and reduce the abuse (don't make them angry, don't cry when they're already shouting, don't do this, don't do that, do x but not y), and THAT is your socialization. THAT is everything you know, everything you are, everything you know relationships to be like.

Once you are away from that, you are completely and utterly lost. Even breathing feels like making a mistake, you feel watched, judged, rated, berated, you have them stuck in your fucking head. So you keep sticking to what you know, your behavioural patterns that have kept you safe your entire life.

The problem is that they kept you safe, past tense. In a healthy environment, all of those coping mechanisms are now maladaptive and harm you instead of keeping you safe.

However, breaking out of them and starting from scratch is terrifying. So, so, so terrifying. I live in constant fear, I feel judged and unsafe in my own flat with the curtains shut and the lights on. I feel like I am about to get subjected to another one of his fits for daring to use the stove.

No matter what you do, your body and brain are SCREAMING at you that diverging from what you know will kill you—and then you have to do it anyway.

Do it alone and afraid and awkwardly but DO IT. Otherwise you will always find a way to recreate the environment you grew up in, whether that is people getting into unhealthy relationships and replicating the patterns they know (which Aziraphale does with Crowley, e.g. the push-pull of his affection) or eventually even returning to it because they ruined you, but a part of you is so, so attached to them you just have to try and change them.

Some people can move on from it without going back, but sometimes you need to try and experience that failure for yourself before being able to move on, and that's where Aziraphale is at.

He needs to try and fail to be capable of finally committing to recovering.

So, to summarize this entire shitshow: Yes, Aziraphale experienced emotional neglect and abuse, and while it is different to what Crowley went through and objectively less intense and physical, it is still just as valid and horrid.

Just because a car accident is objectively worse than falling off a bike doesn't mean the biker's pain is unimportant. Both can kill you, both can hurt you, and both deserve to get their injuries treated.

Questions?

#alex answers asks #alex talks good omens #good omens #good omens meta #aziraphale #crowley #aziraphale meta #good omens season 2 #go2 #aziracrow #crowley x aziraphale #ineffable husbands #ineffable wives #ineffable spouses #ineffable divorce #the final fifteen #heaven is terrible #trauma discussion #long post

[yanderes-galore]

Romantic/Platonic Chol 'Von (Halo) with a human trader darling, who lives on one of the colonies that does unsavory business with pirates like her. Don't care which format, whichever is easiest to write.

I'm going to be honest, I've never read Mortal Dictata or any of the Kilo-Five books yet. However, I did do my research on the character so I hope I get her character right. Sorry for any inaccuracies! As a result this may be short. When I find time to read the book maybe I'll rewrite this, I'm happy to take feedback!

Yandere! Chol 'Von with Human Trader! Darling

(Halo: Mortal Dictata)

Pairing: Romantic/Platonic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, Manipulation, Possessive behavior, Violence, Threats, Dubious companionship.

I wouldn't doubt Chol comes in contact with human traders.

With her ambitious goals and fondness towards human phrases and ideologies it isn't too far off to think she'd buy from you.

She needs supplies for her Kig-Yar navy and Kig-Yar have been known to ally with humans if it benefits them.

To you, Chol is merely a client when she visits your colony to discuss affairs.

She feels like an egotistical shipmistress T'vaoan Kig-Yar who enjoys intimidation.

Chol is also easily impatient and temperamental, very quick to be stressed when things don't go her way.

She's been known to be persistent in her goals and is stubborn.

To make some money you trade with her.

It isn't too new to you, you've traded with Kig-Yar and Sangheili in the past.

Yet this one is important... she's a feared shipmistress and knows it.

You've heard vaguely in Kig-Yar culture that females of the species tend to have a lot of power.

As a result you are always very respectful in your deals.

You supply fuel, weapons, all sorts of cargo.

In return you're given other valuable items or some sort of currency in return.

You're just in it for the connections and money.

Kig-Yar are pirates... but you feel they can be good allies if you provide them what they like.

Which is what Chol likes about you.

She likes your human ideologies and picks up certain phrases and info about you.

You aren't part of any major faction... just a human trying to get by.

In a way she relates due to her species culture.

Chol sees you as the key to seeing her goals through.

With your wares she can make that navy she wanted and maybe even convince the other Kig-Yar to listen to her.

Chol is more likely to be a platonic yandere to her new favorite trader.

However... toying with the romantic idea is a bit interesting albeit not plausible.

After all... she sees her current mate as a coward who fled from her and her chicks.

Maybe a human will provide much better... even if nothing can happen between you.

Chol is demanding towards you at times due to her egotistical nature.

It's an honor to help her as a human.

She respects you and is a fearsome T'vaoan shipmistress.

Can't you see you're special if she's interacting with you?

Having her as your ally will make you strong and protected.

So you better keep providing for her, yeah?

In fact... you only need her as your customer... she'll give you much better equipment in return for your services.

Her ego is definitely what makes her try to control you.

She promises you good things in return if you just make her your primary client.

If you don't do so willingly... she can threaten you.

Do you doubt her? She could cause so much trouble for you if you refuse her.

Chol feels she can control you.

After all she often boasts that she can get whatever she wants.

Any mate, any valuable, anything.

If not... she doesn't mind the ensuing bloodshed.

So when she makes an offer with you... one that makes you loyal to her on one of her ships by her side and under her protection as her primary merchant/negotiater...

She expects you to accept when she tells you.

#yandere halo #yandere halo novels #yandere chol 'von #yandere kig-yar

[unsentlettersforpalestine]

Friday, April 12, 2024

To you, fellow human

What time did you get up? Did you get enough sleep? How was your morning? What did you have for breakfast? You took shower with clean water, didn't you? Did you hear some birds chirping ? The morning breeze was certainly very tranquilizing, wasn't it? You were able to do your morning routine without any hindrance, right? There might be some inconveniences during the day but overall it's been quite a good day, right?

While you are spending your day with your family, relatives, friends, coworkers, clients, neighbors, strangers, or even only by yourself, don't forget to take some time alone to express gratitude. Contemplate about all the blessings God has given to you. Realize that you are living a damn good life. Make no mistake, I am not trying to belittle your problems or the shit you've been dealing with, but trust me when I say: you're lucky. Because you really are.

You might unintentionally come up with some grievances about your life every now and then, but be brutally honest and tell me, on a scale from one to ten, how much you are grateful for your life? Five? Six? Seven? Eight? If your answer is under 5, then I am begging you, please, sit down for a couple of minutes and listen to me.

I know we all have our own problems—both major and minor. But tell me, has someone ever bombed your house? Have you ever felt afraid of being kidnapped or ruthlessly tortured or sexually assaulted or shot at? Have you ever lost a bunch of family members and relatives and neighbors and friends at the same time? Do you, by any chance, know what it feels to experience forced starvation not for a day, not for a week, but for a really long period of time? Have you ever ran out of water, electricity, and fuel for months? The answer for all these questions is a clear no, right?

You are lucky. I am lucky. We are all lucky. Because despite everything, we are living a decent life. We have all that we need (or most of what we need or whatever) and we have never gone through what Palestinians have been going through for more than 75 years. Even the biggest ordeal that we ever went through is nothing compared to what Palestinians are constantly going through.

Some of us might complain about the same/ similar menu we have on a regular basis, don't we ever realize what a luxury it is have enough foor and be able to eat breakfast, lunch and dinner every day? Palestinians are literally being starved to death by Israshit and some of them don't even have a small bag of flour to make simple bread and look at us, here we are shamelessly throwing our foods away. Palestinians feel happiest when they can get a bag of flour and a glass of drinkable water but here, we are constantly grousing over trivial matters—be it intentionally or unintentionally.

It's worth nothing that regardless of what our respective life looks like, we are all privileged. Because unlike Palestinians, we are living a pretty decent life. We are never living under continual brutal occupation. We are not being massacred. We are never going through a fucking genocide. We are safe. We are good, we truly are.

Just a friendly reminder that as a human being, we have a duty to bear witness, be in solidarity and support Palestinians in any shape or form. I am not asking you to ceaselessly watch harrowing pictures and videos coming out of Palestine. I am simply asking you to have some sympathy with them. Do something, anything, to help them. Use the voice that has been bestowed upon by God for you. Spread awareness. Educate yourself and the people around you about Palestinian cause. Go to the nearby protests if you can. Have uncomfortable conversations with both friends and strangers. Don't stop talking about Palestine. Always remember Palestinians in your day-to-day life. And most importantly, keep making prayer for them.

FROM THE RIVER TO THE SEA, PALESTINE WILL BE FREE🇵🇸🇵🇸🇵🇸

#free gaza #free palestine #gaza #palestine #gaza genocide #gaza strip #gazaunderattack #i stand with palestine #stop the genocide #israel is a genocidal state #israel is committing genocide #israel is an apartheid state #israel is a terrorist state #fuck israel #deep feelings #deep thoughts #life quotes #love quotes #love #life #poems and quotes #writers and poets #writers on tumblr #writing #writeblr #writerscommunity #from the river to the sea palestine will be free

[amypihcs]

Hello humans and statisticians!! First part of illustrious client! The comments were written while i was recovering by one of my worst headaches so... yep. trying to give myself as many happy chemicals as possible.

LET'S BEGIN! With a VERY PERSISTENT Watson that still in 1925 as he's stroking Holmes' hair and just generally cuddling him asks if he can publish this story.

AND HE SAID YES, GUYS! Watson asked for TEN YEARS. When he asked Holmes if he would marry him it only took ten seconds for Holmes to answer by kissing Watson silly. THIS. Is a couple goal.

Anyway, let's see what happened -stirs hot chocolate milk-

Uhm, don't you say, Watson, you both? And you have your favorite nook? AAh. 'Long, thin, nervous arm' check. Flirting by Watson check. Burritoed Holmes check.

Now what is in that envelope?

A CLIENT! and an important one! Both our husbands know him, apparently, he's a household name.

Of course, my dearest, it's OUR case. Now DO kiss me, Watson. I want this matter out of my head until 4:30 -Holmes who had been staring at his husband just as much as Watson.

liar.

You had to write this to make up with the scenes UP. I do believe you are in practice again, but there's no WAY IN HELL that you're not living with your husband after he pratically asked you to bugger him at the turkish baths.

Well, guy arrives at Baker Street in good time. A nice impression already.

He was prepared to find Watson, he thinks he'll be important for the case. He ticks all of the boxes Holmes requires to behave in his best way! Good!

W: See Holmes CAN be polite... mfg H: -SMOOCH- If people are polite to my Watson.

SO an austrian murder! Good, good! (Is Moran alive? bah!) What's he up to?

I LIKE this guy. he has good priorities! Holmes agrees as well!

W-what? No client's name? NO, I WON'T PLAY THIS GAME!

'Client': -puppy eyes- may i... please tell you the facts? H: k. I promise nothing.

PROCEEDS TO TRY AND ATTRACT HOLMES TO THE CASE. (That tactic would've worked better on Watson, but this is good.) AND WHAT THE HELL. Sexism. bah! Bonking them, at least apparently this girl is (usually) a nice one-

And now, in good substance...

Holmes... I see what you're trying to do. But you're wrong this time. It's not the general but a friend. Please don't investigate on IT (They'll do it in their free time in sussex. or on vacation -wink-)

WELL, HOLMES LIKES THIS CASE! ACCEPTED!

now, infoinfoinfo!

Holmes you don't need to sound so admired. Really, my man. Well, byebye, need to think!

-proceeds to dissociate for half an hour-

Earth to Holmes? Ah Watson! Ideas?

tbh Watson's idea isn't an evil one. But Holmes is more logic and he's probably right! Well, do you have a solution, Holmes?

Of course, my friend Johnson! Ah, the criminal one? YES, dear readers, Holmes HAS friends in the underworld. What, they're USEFUL! And probably know a lot of good places to have a relaxing evening!

fast-forward to the evening! Holmes is getting them to dinner at their favorite place!

So they dine and Holmes updates Watson! And then lets a thing slip...

And Watson gets ANXIOUS AND PROTECTIVE!

H: I'm sorry, love, i didn't tell you not to worry you, you know me W: You were in DANGER Holmes, are you alright? H: Of course i am, i'll tell you what happened

What was basically two men trying to scare each other away. Gruner gets very physical with the threats. He's used to have his enemies attacked... Holmes is NOT SCARED AT ALL! You kidding?

He recognizes the danger of course. And now wants cuddles because he was really a good detective. And wants to stay near Watson!

#letters from watson #victorian husbands #sherlock holmes #dr john watson #they're so married.

[lunarhobbits]

misc sweeney hcs

(disclaimer. i am new-ish here and have no idea how popular/prevalent any of these are go easy on me ok. also a lot of these are dadben related wh o o p s)

i've seen some variance of if this is canon in fics and stuff but i really do like the idea of the barkers also living above the pie shop in addition to the barbershop being there. similar situation w the pie shop/lovett living quarters. ig it's just easier to picture in my head then????

(p sure the b*rton film confirms smth like this but i'm ignoring it bc i don't like that guy. this idea is mine now)

part of the reason i like this so much is it means that benjamin barker had all the more time to have lovely moments with lucy and johanna when he wasn't busy with clients

(this also makes sweeney returning there without them all the more painful. if he sits and doesn't do anything then he's flooded by memories of the life he had in those same walls fifteen years ago. like no wonder sweeney's so bent out of shape by being forced to wait for the judge and the beadle to come to him)

johanna had only JUST started walking when ben was transported. he was so excited and happy and loved to try and assist her, encouraging her to take steps holding his hands. chattering away about her with any customer that would listen, perhaps even showing her off ("look at my jo! she's such a fine girl!" "i'm sure she is, mr. barker, but could you please finish shaving me?")

he bought johanna a little lacy bonnet when she was a week old. she didn't need something so fancy at such a young age, and lucy had already sewn her a few bonnets months prior. it wasn't the most sound financial decision he ever made. but oh, his girl just had to have it, and it's a little big, she could grow into it! (lucy admits she looks very cute with it on, even though she says johanna doesn't need it)

(the bonnet is left forgotten in a drawer somewhere for years, until sweeney opens that particular drawer and finds it gathering dust upon his return. he feels sick seeing it, reminding him again how much he missed. then he puts it back and refuses to give it any mind.)

nellie lovett was infuriated by lucy barker in that way that you can't quite pinpoint why you're mad other than they're "too perfect" or "too pretty" or something. ofc there was the fact she was married to ben, but i think there was a little "get out of my school" energy going on there too

idk exactly how lucy ended up on the street (or in bedlam, as lovett says in the finale) but i do think that nellie was, sadly, at least complicit in inaction to stop this from happening (if not having thrown her out herself)

anthony is the sweetest dude around and genuinely loves johanna. doesn't matter that he barely knows her when he says he'd marry her, he knows that he's going to be happy as long as she is

johanna loves him too, and she's surprised by it. not because of anything to do with anthony, but because she's felt so little real love in her life (that she can remember). it's a wonderful and frightening rush looking at him, sometimes, but then he squeezes her hand, or does something silly, or even just sneezes or clears his throat and she's brought back down to reality, in a good way. that anthony is real, and human like her. she doesn't have to "earn" his love by being utterly perfect.

they get out of london basically as soon as they can, just wanting to leave it all behind, at least for a while

it took a little time and arguing but anthony did end up getting a good sum of money from the judge's death, through johanna's inheritance going to her husband (him). they immediately used this money to finance travel. they both love to travel, anthony promising to show her the beauty of the world that, still, cannot rival her in his eyes

this is all i got that's coherent rn really lol. anyway here you go sweeney todd fans who liked/reblogged my post haha @demonbarberofbeepbeep @captains-clever-goose @little-lovett @fabulousairpirate @funnygirlthatbelle

#sweeney todd #benjamin barker #johanna barker #anthony hope #lucy barker #sweeney todd the demon barber of fleet street #headcanon

[crownmemes]

The Outsider Sentences

(Sentences from The Outsider (2020). Adjust phrasing where needed)

"It's like he's begging us to catch him, but what kind of criminal does that?"

"My lawyer would probably fire me as a client if he knew I was talking to you."

"I'm as baffled by this conflicting evidence as you are."

"Is there a mystery here? Yes. Will there always be unanswered questions? Most likely. Sometimes that happens, and when it does, you just need to learn how to live with it and move on."

"I have no tolerance for the unexplainable."

"Every once in a while, I like to hear the voice of someone who's on my side."

"Why do people have to tell jokes? I've never understood that."

"You can't help me. No one can."

"It can look like a person if it needs to be, but it's not."

"I like you better when you're drinking."

"I just asked you a straight question. I want you to give me a straight answer."

"I'm sure it's too late for us to ever be friends, and for that I take all the blame."

"A human being cannot be in two realities at the same time."

"Don't you think I know what I sounded like today? Do you think I enjoy being humiliated and laughed at like that?"

"If I believe something to be true, then I have to deliver that truth no matter what."

"Whenever I find myself unable to uncover a reasonable explanation for a so-called inexplicable criminal act, it only means I haven't uncovered it yet. But then I do, because there's always one out there."

"You know, it's one thing to respect the unexplainable, but it's another to pretend that you know the specific thing, and give it a name and a resume."

"The way I look at it, he wouldn't be trying to stop us if what we were doing wasn't threatening to him, and he wouldn't be threatened if he wasn't vulnerable."

"So what is it? A vampire? Satan? How old is it? My age? Centuries? Before the big bang? Is there just the one, or are there others?"

"For all that we now know and understand about the world these days, that's a hell of a lot more that we don't, and maybe never will."

"I didn't drive down here in the middle of the night just to babysit!"

"It fucking hurts to be shot!"

"Save your ammunition and stop shooting - it's splitting my head in two!"

"You haven't come all this way just to turn back now, have you?"

"We're not very good at answering each other's questions, are we?"

"Are you really going to pull that trigger?"

"I eat to survive, just like you."

#rp meme #rp memes #roleplay meme #roleplay memes #rp prompts #roleplay prompts #sentence starters #specific; #crime drama; #supernatural drama; #filmtv; #the outsider;

[thedrarrylibrarian]

Hi! I heard this is the establishment if you're looking for fic recs! I was wondering if you had any werewolf recs? I don't mind if it's Harry or Draco that's a werewolf, I just love it when werewolves or especially creature politics are featured! Thanks so much in advance!

Hello! This is certainly an establishment for fic recs! I'm glad you're here and I definitely have some werewolf recs for you!

🌕 Howl for joy at tonight’s full moon because I’ve found some awesome recs for you! 🌕

Full Moon by @dracopetal (267 words, rated T)

Full Moon. Follow on from Wolf.

Far Side by @tackytigerfic (833 words, rated M)

Harry has a photograph of Draco and Scorpius on his desk at work. He says it's his favourite.

The Scent of Home by @vdoshu (1,000 words, rated T)

Years on from the war and Draco still has nightmares. Fortunately, home is never too far away.

First Kiss by @drarrily-we-row-along (1,060 words, rated T)

It wasn't that Harry personally didn't want to continue making out with people, honestly he was pretty sure that he could have been even better at it with his newly acquired senses if it weren't for the fact that everyone smelled awful.

It was really bloody annoying. The only thing more annoying was that Draco Malfoy smelled bloody fantastic.

Moon by @drarrily-we-row-along (1,279 words, rated T)

Harry closed his eyes and his chin dropped down to rest on his chest as he took a breath, “Please,” he whispered. “Draco, I can’t,” he shook his head. “I’m afraid.”

After sunlit days, one thing stays the same by flightinflame (2,057 words, rated T)

Harry wakes up sore after a full moon. Luckily, Draco is beside him, and knows how to handle it.

sink your teeth in by @softlystarstruck (3,831 words, rated E)

Harry, or the wolf, or the wolf-that-is-Harry, is possessive. But he's trying not to show it.

Draco, though? Draco wants to be wanted.

Look for Me in The Sun by @wolfpants (8,737 words, rated M)

Harry and Draco are on the run in America after a mysterious string of werewolf-like attacks in the Muggle community causes the Ministry to impose new and harsh anti-werewolf legislation. Giant trees, crashing waves, seedy motel rooms, and the long and winding coastal road awaits them, but will they ever be able to go back home?

Howl by @tackytigerfic (8,911 words, rated M)

After an encounter with a vicious werewolf, Draco Malfoy wakes in a field hospital with a mangled shoulder, a furry little problem, and an inconvenient crush on Harry Potter. Potter, meanwhile, is still trying to save the world, only this time he wants Draco right there with him while he does it. Taking part in a rebellion against a corrupt regime isn't always glamorous, but at least sometimes there are organic farmshop pastries and fancy hotel bedsheets. Just don't ask about that smell of burning.

The One You Feed by @sweet-s0rr0w (10,375 words, rated T)

Draco's been a werewolf for almost twenty years now, and he's an expert in helping new werewolves adapt to the change. He's seen it all before - or so he thinks, until his newest client, a recently turned Harry Potter, arrives on his doorstep.

Over the Moon by kasena and @veryspacecowboy (14,783 words, rated E)

Harry and Draco are Auror partners when Draco is bitten by a werewolf and flees. Now on the run, Harry must convince him to come back.

Take the Moon by @tackytigerfic (15,192 words, rated M)

Harry Potter has always wanted a family of his own, and when a deadly blood curse forces him into a marriage bond with his best friend Draco Malfoy, it looks like he might just have found one. Living with Draco (biscuit-lover, no work/life balance, good hair) and his son Scorpius (also biscuit-lover, colour-codes his bricks, proud bearer of plastic swan-shaped garden ornament) gives Harry the routine and companionship he’s always craved. There’s also the matter of the really great sex (because what’s a marriage of convenience without a little fun, after all?) It's just a shame they’d always planned to break up after a year…

Human by @ghaniblue (27,700 words, rated E)

(Official Summary) Harry isn't dealing well with being bitten and turned into a werewolf. Draco isn't dealing well with Harry packing up and leaving like a thief in the night. Things come to a head in a forest cabin in the German Ore Mountains.

(Unofficial Summary) An annoying posh wanker is stuck in a forest cabin for a month with the most frustrating, taciturn prat on the planet. The prat is a werewolf who ran away from home. The wanker desperately wants to make Little Red Riding Hood jokes. They are in love.

Names for a House by @teledild0nix  (45,556 words, rated E)

Eleven years after the Battle of Hogwarts, Harry is a wildly successful wizarding novelist and his godson, budding werewolf Teddy Lupin is about to start at Hogwarts. Teddy comes to live with Harry at Grimmauld Place, but after a boggart attacks Teddy in the house, Harry hires a cursebreaker to help with the decontamination of it. When the cursebreaker turns out to be Draco Malfoy, is there too much bad blood between Harry and Draco for them to be able to work together, even to keep the one person they most care about safe?

all the western stars by @oflights (78,342 words, rated E)

Draco is a Seer who has been struck with terrible, uncontrollable visions of the deaths of everyone around him, triggered by touch. He retreats to an Unplottable Black family cottage to research his condition and fix it. Things are going relatively well until Harry Potter shows up at the cottage with a furry condition of his own.

The Light More Beautiful by @firethesound (81,255 words, rated E)

Thirteen years after Draco accepts Potter's help escaping the horror of his sixth year, he returns to England where he makes the unfortunate discovery that Potter is still as obnoxious as ever. And worse, more than a decade overseas hasn't been enough to dim Draco's obsession with him.

Who we are in the shadows by @quicksilvermaid (99,714 words, rated E)

Ex-Auror Harry Potter, tossed out of the Ministry for something he had no control over, has been looking for a way back to his former life. When he comes across Draco Malfoy in the criminal underbelly of Wizarding London and in need of protection, Harry figures bringing him in to face the Ministry's justice is his ticket back to everything he's lost.

But nothing is exactly as it seems. Not even Harry himself. And as he gets drawn further and further into Malfoy's world of honour and deception he finds himself questioning everything he thought he knew—about his childhood nemesis, the Ministry job he misses so much, and most of all, about himself.

Way Down We Go by @xiaq (109,767 words, rated T)

In which Harry and Draco both run away from their pasts and conveniently choose to hide in the same tiny American town.

❤️ As always, if you find a fic you enjoy, please remember to leave the author a kudos or a comment! ❤️

Lots of Love and Happy Reading!

#harry/draco #werewolves #drarry fic recs #drarry fic rec list #drarry rec list #drarry fanfic rec list #lots of love and happy reading #the drarry librarian #harry potter #draco malfoy #harry potter/draco malfoy #harry potter x draco malfoy #draco malfoy/harry potter #draco malfoy x harry potter #draco/harry #draco x harry #harry x draco

[1rsoldiersince2012]

Bound by Law (Matt Murdock x Reader)

Words: 2701 (chapter 34)

Summary:

You and Matt met in the courtroom. Now, you may think that Matt was a knight in shining armour and defended you in the name of all United States laws, but that was not the case. Matt was totally destroying your client, and you wanted to tear him into pieces right then and right there, because with Murdock as your rival, your head is on the firm's plate with each case. Did Matt care? No, he only cared about bringing justice, he was a human-machine, driven by the need to bring righteousness no matter the cost. Or was he just that? What happens when you get involved in Fisk's business and Daredevil's lies against your will?

34. Lawyers, Guns and Money, pt. 2

It didn't take long for Matt to answer your kiss. Your lips, tightly pushed against his, demanding for more, drove him crazy. He felt your hands posessively squeeze his cheeks, then softly brush against his beard and he almost let out a sigh of bliss, but instead, opened his mouth to welcome your tongue. You almost saw stars in your eyes when your tongues met in the middle and Matt's hands pushed your body flush against his, fingers grasping the material of your jacket to ease the tension because otherwise he'd be too harsh.

His hair felt so good between your fingers, smoothly sliding on his scalp. You wished your fingertips would have memory, so you would never forget this feeling.

Matt wanted to stay like this forever. He didn't care about oxygen, the case, the devil, crimes and this fucked up city that he loved so much. He didn't care about anything in the world because he was finally touching you, clinging to your jacket like his life depended on it, he finally was so close to you that he felt your crazy heartbeat reflect on his chest through the layers of clothes, because finally your hearts were beating the same rhythm.

You reluctantly pull away, breathless like a fish thrown out of the water and look at Matt, eyes tightly closed, a dazed expression on his face and slightly puckered cheery red lips. You felt your lips tingle when you inhaled much needed air and it hit your wet lips. You wanted to lick them to stop the tingling but you didn't want the taste of Matt's lips to disappear so soon. "We're never going to work, Matt," words leave your mouth without too much though when you breathe in his cologne, savouring the scent.

"How do you know?" He presses his forehead to yours, heads and noses touching uncomfortably, yet souls starving for any kind of contact.

"I just feel it." You whisper, nails almost digging into his wrists that tightly hold onto your jacket. You knew why.

"But it doesn't mean that we shouldn't try." He furrows his eyebrows, making you do the same.

"I feel something for you, Matt." You close your eyes, taking a shaky breath, "but I feel like there's something keeping us away from one another." Your past. It was always about the things you wished to forget. Not Wesley, not Robert, not anyone who you have hooked up with in college. Someone else.

He sighs, exactly knowing what you're talking about. It's him. He can't live two different lives without sacrificing one of them. The Devil can't exist if Matt Murdock is being himself, but Matt feels like he can't exist without the Devil as well. This is the most toxic relationship he's ever had, and it's been constantly ruining his life.

"I don't want to ruin what we already have if we don't work." You say again, as he stays silent, breathing in your emotions. You felt like you two have worked on your friendship too much to throw it out of the window so easily.

"What if we have already ruined it?" He laughs humourlessly, feeling your soft hands on his wrist, where his pulse was tearing apart his skin.

"Then I guess there's nothing left to ruin." You whisper, and he frees his right hand from your grasp, touching your neck, feeling the hot skin under his fingers and your eyes close on instinct. He kisses you, in a possessive way, as if afraid that someone might steal you right out of his hands.

You pull him closer, hands getting lost in his dark hair again, Matt spins you around and presses your lower back to the cabinet. "Matt" you whisper when he pulls away, but not to breathe in the much-needed air, but to pepper your neck with kisses. You tilt your head back, all too suddenly, and accidentally bang it on the upper cabinet. "Shit."

Matt pulls away quickly, touching the back of your head, "you're hurt?"

"God, no." You chuckle and then both of you break into a mutual laughter, Matt presses his head onto your chest. Your hands hanging on his shoulders, you whisper, "why do I feel like this, Matt?"

"Like what?" He murmurs into your shirt, hands sliding behind your back.

"Like I can't breathe without the feeling of your lips. Like I can't focus when you're not in the room, but when you're in it, I can't focus either." You fall silent, and Matt squeezes you a little tighter. "Please tell me you feel the same."

Matt doesn't get a chance to answer when someone slams the main office doors. You both pull away from each other as if burned with fire, and you quickly pretend to be making coffee.

"Matt, how much sugar?"

"Uh, two, please."

"Oh, you guys are still here. I saw the light, and thought that I should come check..." Karen peeks into the kitchen and takes a weird look at the two of you. Matt looks lost and quite embarrassed, and you almost chuckle when you see the way he's sitting at the table, legs uncomfortably crossed.

"Yeah, we were still looking over the case. You can go home now, Karen, I'll lock it up." You smile cheekily, not looking at Matt, but putting on the kettle.

"I actually wouldn't say no to a cup of coffee. If it's no bother, of course." Karen drops her bag, and leaves the room. It was still weird between the two of you. With the way you shouted at her before and calmly spoke now, one would think that you have a serious mental illness.

"Sure!" You shout back, and feeling that she went far enough, laugh into your fist like a schoolgirl. "Problems, Matthew?"

"I'd rather not talk about it." He says embarrassed, yet still smirking.

"I think I haven't lost my charm over the years." You proudly say, fixing your hair, and then taking a look at Matt's head. "God, fix your hair before she comes back."

"So, any breakthrough?" Karen returns, and sits on the other side of the small table, eyeing Matt weirdly. You slightly fix your jacket, hoping that there are no wrinkles from the way Matt was grabbing the material.

"Uh, no, not yet." You say, putting on your serious lawyer mask.

"Well, that's a bummer."

"Yeah..." Matt finally says something, in hopes to throw Karen off the tracks.

"How's that... Printer business going?" You desperately try to make small talk before the coffee is ready, only then you can return to the case and out of Karen's sight.

"Um, good, yeah. I placed an order for the cartridge, I think it should arrive next week."

"Oh, good." You nod and turn around to fill up the cups when the kettle goes off.

"Wait, you're buying a new cartridge?" Matt intervenes, returning to the present moment again.

"Yes, I can't have Karen running to the library with our case documents." You turn around and place the cups on the table, purposely leaving yours on the counter.

"We have no money for that, I think you know." Matt argues, but you quickly silence him.

"I'm paying for it, don't get your panties in a twist."

"We've talked about this, y/n." The way your name rolled off his tongue made your insides drop again. Any other day you wouldn't have paid attention but now it almost drove you crazy.

"Hey, guys, it's okay, yeah? We'll pay you back when we get some money." Karen acknowledges herself again, stopping before you two start a quarrel.

"Nothing happens again without me knowing it, alright?" Matt crosses his arms, and frowns a little when you grab your cup and leave the kitchen area.

"Sure, captain." You shout from the distance and close the office doors, returning to the case, although who were you kidding, you couldn't focus on anything, except for the lingering feeling of Matt's lips on yours.

***

The late night session ends with you getting a call from your landlady, telling you that there's some water leaking from your flat to the neighbour's flat below, and you're needed there ASAP.

Which ends with you getting knocked out by three men in your flat, and put in a van, with a scarf on your eyes.

Which ends with you tied to a chair in a big, shabby room, with two big men guarding the doors. Someone pulls the scarf from your eyes and the bright light briefly blinds you. "Ah, what the shit." You say and notice the man who pulled the dark material from your eyes. "You."

"Me." Wesley answers with a note of regret in his voice.

"Should've known that." You chuckle, feeling how your hands already got numb from being tied behind your back.

"Yeah, you should've." He looks at you and then hesitantly reaches his hand to put the strand of hair behind your ear, face softening.

"Wesley, let's make our guest comfortable." A man bigger than the two standing near the door enters the room, and Wesley's hand quickly leaves your face. "Leave us alone." He says to the two guards, and they disappear in the depths of the corridor.

Wesley kneels behind you and starts untying the rope, hands gently sliding along yours. Involuntary, you shiver.

"I hope the journey did not cause any inconvenience." Fisk sits down on your left, Wesley remains standing on your right, as if the devil and angel on your shoulder turned into a parody with two demons.

"Yeah, sure, getting drugged and kidnapped is exactly how I wanted my night to end." You say sarcastically, mind briefly returning to Matt, who was left with Karen to guide him home.

"My apologies, if I interrupted your plans, Miss y/l/n." Fisk says with a fake sorrow in his voice.

"Why am I here?" You ask frustrated. Although your hands were completely free, you felt as if you were glued to the chair and couldn't move a muscle.

The little shadow of fear in your eyes felt as satisfying as ruling Hell's Kitchen, and Fisk's lips twitched into a loopsided grin. "I wanted to talk about some things with you. Give you an offer, a piece of my mind."

You say nothing, and apparently it gets on Fisk's nerves when he is ignored. "I don't do business with people who don't even tell me their name." You finally say, not breaking the eye contact with Fisk. He thinks for a moment, but finally one word leaves his mouth. Not what you expected, and definitely not what Wesley expected.

"Kingpin."

"Kingpin?" You ask, raising your eyebrows theatrically. "I think kingpig would suit you more."

Fisk grabs your chin, harshly and so suddenly, that you audibly gasp. Wesley moves an inch forward, his hand, still by his side, is sort of reaching towards you. Fisk notices the movement and lessens the grasp of his fingers.

"You have a big mouth, Miss y/l/n. We don't want it to get you into trouble. Right Wesley?" Fisk looks at James, without moving his head.

"Certainly, yes, sir."

"Understood?" Fisk tilts your head to the side, and towards him, so close, that you can feel the faint smell of the omelette that Fisk had for breakfast. You don't hurry to answer, and the fat fingers tighten again.

"Understood." You rasp out, and the hand, holding your chin, disappears in the sleeve of the black jacket again, as if it was a dog retreating on command.

"I'm grateful that we have this understanding between us, Miss y/l/n. It's nice doing business with people who have a connection between them. Do you think we have that connection?"

You bite your tongue for a moment before you say something that might get you killed on the spot again. "Perhaps we do, Mr Kingpin. How does it look for you, James?" You ask bitterly, turning to look at Wesley. He holds your glare and manages to nod a yes.

"Now that we have an agreement, I want to convince you that I'm serious about what I'm going to tell later. Just it's a pity that we have to meet under these circumstances, especially when you were so close to solving that case, Miss y/l/n."

You remain silent.

"I want you to drop it. Not only you, your whole firm of freaks in the suits. Drop the case, and we won't have to face any difficulties."

"What, did I scratch the nerve?" You retort, crossing your arms. Fisk grimaces, obviously containing another anger episode.

"What I'm offering, is a peaceful agreement, but if you decide to rebel, which... Would be too stupid for such a smart person like you, to put your loved ones into danger. I've been wanting to talk to your father for a while now." He notices how your jaw tighten, and a murderous smile appears on his fat face. Now he hit the nerve.

"I drop the case and, you what, just magically disappear?"

Fisk's smile never falls, on the contrary, it gets bigger. "Your lawyer strategies won't work here. Do we have an agreement or not, Miss y/l/n?"

Matt would kill you on the spot if he knew that you were signing a contract with the devil himself. "Possibly."

"I suggest you be careful about your choices. Now, why the sour faces?" Fisk looks at the two of you, Wesley staring at the dried blood spot on the table, and you, disgust on your face, looking at your hands in your lap. "I'm hosting a gala next week, and I'll be delighted to have you participating in it."

Your lips twitch briefly. "I have no other choice, do I?" Fisk doesn't answer, just nods to Wesley.

"Take her home. Friday, 7 pm." Fisk says, and you stand up on your own, before Wesley has a chance to grab your elbow.

The walk to the black SUV is as awkward as Wesley imagined it to be. Ordering the driver to leave, Wesley takes off his coat and puts it around your shoulders when you sit, and reaches to fasten your seatbelt, but you quickly snatch it from him without any words. He sits in the car, and locks the doors from the inside.

You huff a laugh, "didn't think you took me for a suicidal." You look straight ahead, hating the feeling of warmth that his coat provided for your shoulders.

"I can never guess what's going on in that head of yours." He says after while.

"If you could, you'd be working with Avengers, not him."

"I'm sorry that you had to meet him this way. I... asked him to wait." Wesley admits, shoulders slumping in defeat.

"Wait for what? A chance to chop off my head?" You finally turn to look at him, and he swallows uncomfortably.

"No."

"Give me a piece of your mind, James, c'mon." You mock Fisk's previous words and his hands on the wheel tighten their grip. "Or should I call you something else, huh?" He remains silent once again, and you nod to yourself. "What is it that he likes to call you? His bitch?" You bite and Wesley suddenly hits the brakes so hard that if it wasn't for the seatbelt, you probably would be lying in the middle of the road.

"Please... Can you just say nothing?" He mutters after collecting himself.

"Don't like my big mouth?" You ask him insolently, and flich when he unexpectedly punches the wheel and the horn rings through the city. Now you remain silent for the rest of the 20-minute ride, actually scared for what he might do if he lost his control. Finally, he pulls next to your building and turns off the ignition.

"I'll pick you up before seven." He dares to break the silence, and only then unlocks the doors. You don't hurry to leave, looking at him with a hurt expression.

"Goodnight, Wesley."

He watches you drop his coat from your shoulders, and slam the car doors loudly. Yet what pains him the most is how you didn't call him by his name. Not anymore.

#matt murdock #foggy nelson #marvel daredevil #matt murdock x reader #netflix daredevil #bound by law #matts superhearing complicates things for you #lawyers #daredevil #marvel #james wesley #karen page #wilson fisk

[69ottersinatrenchcoat]

I'm so sorry if this is too personal.. You've talked about suicidal ideation before. When you're feeling that way, what keeps you alive?

Gosh, this is… such a good question. And no worries <3 it's not too personal for me.

Cw: mentions of suicide and death (mostly positively)

It'll vary by alter, I'll try to get the others to respond if they're comfortable.. for me (🔥), there's a few.

- Knowing it's my role as the primary protector to keep our body safe to the best of my ability.

- I've always doubted the existence of an afterlife, and truthfully I'm a bit jealous of anyone who can believe there is one. And in doing so, I have no idea what's next.. is it just... an end? do we just decompose as science suggests? does my system get broken up according to their beliefs? do we get reincarnated? does heaven/hell exist..? If so.. where am I going?

Those kinds of questions keep me up at night. I don't like to admit it but I'm afraid of missing out on life, of missing opportunities to grow, to learn, to find out about the others.. to solve the hazy mystery that is our past, and to understand what motivates and drives humans to act the ways they do... and I'm afraid of dying; of the sheer unknown of it. No one who has ever died has ever lived to tell the tale, and that scares and intrigues me in a way I can't begin to explain in any comprehensible way.

And.. the three greatest things that keep me alive...

- our out-of-system friends and family; both the knowledge that our closest friends wouldn't be aware if we died (they're online, I doubt anyone would think to reach out to inform them), and that it would hurt our loved ones far more than a lot of our system realise.

- The knowledge that there isn't just One Of Us. Rock bottom does often appear absolutely bleak, and we have struggled with suicidal ideation on and off since the age of seven, and consistently since twelve. However, in my eyes... it's not really suicide when you know you're a system. The way I see it (and I'm not speaking for everyone in our system, or systems in general), but if I were to kill the body, I'd be killing more than just my conciousness. I'd be taking out not only myself, but my children, the host, our trauma holders; my family, friends, colleagues, and strangers. As I see it, it's closer to mass murder from non-consenting parties than a suicide, even if it appears to be a suicide from the perspective of an outsider. The others have as many thoughts, feelings, beliefs, and reflections on the would as I do. If I wouldn't commit suicide knowing that I would kill several others in the real world, why would I do that to a single body but multiple people? Just my take.

And lastly,

The hope of becoming a psychologist. Every time my mind strays to ending it, I imagine myself sitting in a pale blue cosy room decorated with a small pride flag, mental health posters, cushions and bean bags, speaking with a client. Maybe that client is telling me why they chose to continue living. Perhaps, I'm speaking with them about their worries about their mood. Perhaps we're talking about the weather, or their disability, or how their family didn't accept them for who they are, or how cupcakes are simply muffins with hats.

It could be a conversation about how they're scared they're treating others poorly. Maybe, my client is a small six-year-old girl whose father brought her in because she was struggling with attention in her classes...

Perhaps, they're six, maybe they're sixteen, they could be sixty, or a hundred and six and telling me about their life as a final gift. Whoever they may be... I'm staying for those future lives. For those I can learn from, and potentially, teach.

... Amber being vulnerable on main? What's this, the apocalypse??

#posted by 🔥 #thank you #actually did #actually dissociative #future psychologist #reasons to live #did joy #depression recovery #recovery

[akutasoda]

hello!! i found your blog through r1999, congrats on the 1k!!

i absolutely loved your angst hc for tennant, so i'd like to request something tennant-related for the event with number 10 & 2. i'm not sure if you can request two prompts at the same time, but if not, feel free to pick just one ^^ (smile)

i love your writing istg it's comfort food to me (even the angst ones) so pls take your time and have a wonderful day, you're doing great!!

polaroids + do you feel that? i don't

prompts - after you part ways the only thing they have left to remember you by is a singular photo + one sided relationship

includes - tennant

warnings - gn!reader, slight fluff, angst no comfort, flirting, wc - 1k

a/n: thank you so much! im glad my writing brings you comfort <3 (even the angst haha)

'humans are all the same, no matter where they are from' was something the great ada tennant had said to pandora. tennant had thought that with all her heart as most people had the same weakness and strengths as everyone else, they were all human at the end of the day. however nowadays she could gladly same there was an exception to her thoughts.

obviously the exception to her was you. the same individual that she met on the streets of paris where she first attempted to sell diamonds to but you surprised her by knowing what her scheme was. you had piqued her interest from that encounter as she had never quite met a stunning figure such as yourself who had the intelligence to call her out on her scams.

it was no surprise to tennant herself that she quickly found herself enamoured by your presence and found herself seeking you out, not just for petty scams that you were very convinced she was trying to pull off. she loved spending her free time with you, the arcanist became much more chivalrous around you andade your heart swoon in ways you never thought possible.

you wanted to memorialize your first date with tennant and so before she picked you up, you made sure that your polaroid camera was brought with. tennant spared no expense when it came to taking you out and she wanted to make sure you had the best time, so when it came to the end of the night as you both sood side by side on the skyline of paris and you held up your polaroid, she couldn't refuse you.

she hasn't been oblivious to the camera that you brought with you but she never mentioned anything as she could take a guess what you brought it for. so when you brought your polaroid up and brought her closer to you, she smiled and pressed a small kiss to your cheek eight as she heard the shutter click. another photo was taken afterwards and after she escorted you back to your accomodation you handed her the first polaroid.

she held that photo close and kept it in perfect condition, she feared that if she lost it she would never gain anything as precious ever again - not even the most expensive diamond could compare to that photo's worth to her. you felt the same really, the second photo was kept in perfect condition and displayed with pride.

it all seemed to perfect in honesty, tennant was the one of the best partners you could ever think of being with - she was so supportive and very quick to compliment you, to treat you right. it was endearing at first, making your heart swoon and fall deeper into live woth her but eventually you're mind started disagreeing. you see, tennant was very good with her words and still treated over people with the same admiration she would with you.

you knew it was part of her character and her trade, it worked wonders with clients who would happily purchase her 'diamonds'. however it just didn't sit right with you when she would start overly complimenting certain high end potential buyers right infront of you. you almost felt selfish for how you acted but who could really blame you when your lover was flirting with others - even for the sake of business.

you voiced your concerns to her as you didn't want your simple jealousy to tear the both of you apart but her honey sweet words that usually made you forgive her for small mishaps sounded cold and fake to you now. her reassurance didn't soothe you and it certainly annoyed you when she began doing the very same thing not even a day later. now you didn't feel so selfish for wanting her to tone it down.

she talked about chilvary and how she wanted to treat you like the gem you were but you really didn't feel that chilvary when she started becoming more distant. she told you time and time again that it was only temporary and she didn't want to get you involved and it made it more than clear to you that when you told her you wanted all parts of her if you were dating her, it went straight over her head.

you hated it but now you could catch yourself staring at the polaroid in your possession with almost a bitter resentment. a part of you felt disappointed in yourself that you fell for her honeyed words and kind actions, maybe she really was just a con woman that sought you out for a long term sale. you decided that you're heart deserved to be let free from the hands that brutally ripped it from your chest with distance and a disregard for your feelings.

the moment the words left your mouth, tennants face dropped. she knew something bad was coming when she came home to see you with a solemn expression on your face but this was what she dreaded. tennant knew and understood that she was becoming slightly distant and did disregard your concerns multiple times but she now realised her words had become fake to you and it was her fault for it.

she somehow managed to work her way back into your heart and convinced you she would change and you could only hope but wish that this wasn't a mistake. it quickly became evident that it was a mistake and all you could do is wonder how long would it be befofe you built the confidence to finally break it off. tennant knew she wouldn't be able to keep you much longer and it broke her heart knowing she had pushed you away - it felt cruel of her to convince you to stay but she didn't want to lose you yet although the way you looked at her made her want to beg for forgiveness. but now, all she could wish for is that you atleast had the kindness to let her keep the polaroid of your first date as a memento to the love she lost because of her own fault.

akutasoda's 1k event

#↪♡akutasoda's 1k event ♡ #↠angst prompt 2 #↠angst prompt 10 #x reader #x gender neutral reader #r1999 x reader #reverse 1999 x reader #reverse 1999 x you #re1999 x reader #r1999 tennant #reverse 1999 tennant #tennant x reader

[switchcase]

Hey! No need to answer this, I'm not sure how you feel about discussing books like this on your blog. Otherwise, if you're willing I was wondering how you felt about Alison Miller's writings? You gave a very good perspective on van der Kolk, so that's why I ask!

Prefacing this with a very big warning not to read any books about RA unless you are in therapy AND your therapist has read the book you want to read AND your therapist thinks you reading it is a good idea.

I don't mind talking about books, though I will say I do not give book recommendations for this topic publicly. I am also going to assume you meant the book she wrote for survivors. As an aside, I have both not read this in a while and don't remember certain sections of it. ∠( ᐛ 」∠)＿

Probably the biggest criticisms are that there is some misattributions for abusers and the belief she seems to have in psychic abilities being a real thing (unsure if this was just to not contest survivor beliefs or maybe I even just interpreted it weirdly at the time). She probably includes survivor stories in this but to be honest those are typically the chunks I do not remember for books on this topic.

Some of what is in this book is outdated and/or no longer considered best practice, which is not necessarily a reflection on her, because the book was published during a time when those were the best practices or the information was up to date. Eg, Miller posits in the book that if you have a dissociative disorder, your trauma likely began in infancy/toddler age. As opposed to the more modern and more expanded age range.

Some of what she writes about are things that I have not personally encountered in my research except in her books. Which is not to say that they aren't true, but a good rule of thumb with these topics is to withhold both belief and disbelief on what you read until and unless you have seen multiple sources all describing the same thing.

I will be very lenient with her on how vague she is about certain topics because it is very difficult to write a book on this subject that isn't massively destabilizing. And also, that her audience was intended to be a very niche group of people. At the time this was written, you basically only ran across resources like this if you were suggested it by your therapist, if you were friends with enough other survivors (aka probably in group therapy or residential) who recommended it to you, or you were digging so deep that you already found a bunch of other resources. I found Miller's book like 5+ layers deep into a therapist site that linked to a survivor support group which linked to another survivor support group that linked to a therapist's website that had a subcategory for RA resources. Meaning that while Miller does word things in very vague ways that now could be criticized as being...a bit too blanket statement-ish and perhaps a bit paranoia inducing, it was not written with the contingency that your average guy could randomly stumble into it. I do still think she was too vague, but I can also see her trying to reality check people throughout the book.

All that said, Miller is one of only a very small group of authors who has written something explicitly for survivors to read. It is probably one of the less triggering books on the subject if only for the detached way she talks about it. And is simultaneously one of the very few books focused on recovering afterward as opposed to simply talking about the how's and why's of the abuse type. Also, I really appreciated this list in the book that was like "positive qualities of survivors" or something similar. "Kindness despite...; Humanity despite...;" lives rent free in my head forever.

Also, I do know that Miller pissed off some groups so she must have done something right. 🤷 She and several of her clients were harassed incessantly for years, even after her retirement.

IIRC @felis-the-complex-multiple has recently been reading this book but idk if Felis is close to done or has thoughts on it.

#also if I remember right a lot of this book is rhetorical questions #ask #anonymous #ramcoa