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collaredkittyboy · 3 months

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Well it's come up multiple times today so I'll make a post about it.

I think the popularization of the word "twink" has ultimately been really bad for people in general.

I know it's hard to track the positive and negative effects of language but I don't think it's hard to see how creating a word for a group of people wherein the most consistent qualifying trait is "being skinny" is healthy for people's self image. Obviously people have lots of ideas about what it means to be a twink- gay, lacking body hair, feminine, beautiful, young, white- but the most consistent descriptor I've seen is "skinny." Hell, it's even a body type on Grindr; the size below "average."

So it kind of functions as a code word in the gay community: anyone can say that they're only interested in twinks and they don't have to look shallow by saying they only like skinny guys. It's such an accepted attitude that no one really bats an eye when they hear it.

I'm not even going to get into how it's become part of the larger issue of people turning "top" and "bottom" into gender roles 2.0, but that is closely related, because people with any internalized homophobia can look at a skinny, feminine man and turn off their fag alarms by viewing him as a woman or not a "real" man, and it makes twinks more acceptable to society at large.

No, ignoring all of that, one of the biggest issues is that gay men are taught by society that they are only attractive while they are skinny. Just having the label "twink" reminds a boy that people are looking at his body and judging it. There were countless times when I was growing up that people would tell me, "You're such a twink," or argue about whether or not I qualified as a twink because I had body hair. People around you, unpromted, judge your body and give you a label based on it, and that label has a large influence on whether or not you're seen as objectively attractive. I know many other gay people who say they wish they were a twink so they could be more attractive to guys.

So think, you have all these kids growing up being told whether or not they qualify as a twink, and then we have the gay community as a whole where it's completely acceptable to say you're only attracted to twinks. I think its because of all of this pressure to be a twink (in other words, to have a below average weight) that many of the gay people that I interact with struggle with a negative body image or eating disorders.

I mean, people talk about "twink death" like it's an actual event that makes a gay man much less attractive, and no one thinks that, maybe, it's harmful to tell a guy that the very day he stops being young and thin and pretty, he will stop being attractive and celebrated?

I'm not qualified to speak on fatphobia in physical queer spaces because I don't have the ability to frequent them where I live, but I can't imagine that these aren't issues at social gatherings as well. I also can't speak on my own experiences with weight discrimination because so far in my life I have had a naturally thin body, but I have experienced a lot of outside pressure to be thin that have caused me to pick up unhealthy eating habits to reduce my weight in fear that I could become fat later on. Thankfully that is something that I've mostly been able to work past. I'm not an expert, but idk, I just wanted to rant on my silly tumblr blog.

Obviously it's impossible for a word to be inherently bad. I'm not trying to imply that saying "twink" is a magic word with evil powers. Obviously the real issues at play here are fatphobia and harmful beauty standards and body shaming. But in my opinion, the popular use of the word twink has made it much easier and acceptable to express fatphobia, etc, in the gay community by turning "skinny person" into a "type of guy that you should try to be so you can be attractive."

#i know i sound annoying and woke but this is my blog and i can post whatever i want :3 #theres so much more to say but this is long enough as it is #no ones gonna read this anyway #gay #queer issues #fatphobia #cw ed mention

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americankimchi · 1 month

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Do you have any tips for writing Obi Wan or any meta in mind with his characterizarion?

hmmm sure why not! i'll give a few tips on how i'd write obi-wan. mind you this is how i interpret the character, so ymmv.

i truly do not like it when fics have obi-wan voluntarily leaving the order. like it's so out-of-character for me in my head that the premise of the story + the writing would have to work triple-time to get me to stick around. now if he's been removed from it by an EXTERNAL SOURCE (not the order. i cannot stress this enough: the jedi kicking obi-wan out is so jarring to me i'll leave the fic in an instant) or somehow unable to return to the order for whatever reason, all is well.

not a prodigy, but a genius. obi-wan is an incredibly intelligent person with an absolutely staggering knowledge base in a wide variety of topics, but all that knowledge was earned through blood, sweat, tears, and time. he sat down with his game face on and put in the work. that's also why he makes an excellent teacher: he knows what most students will struggle with because he struggled too, and knows through experience how best to overcome them. i headcanon that it contributes to why he's such a good negotiator: he's really good at stripping down information to the essentials and communicating that information effectively and efficiently to others because of his intense study habits.

humble, but not ignorant of his skills. it's pretty impossible to fully divorce yourself from pride in your achievements, and i don't think it's healthy to not feel any pride at all, so i think obi-wan has a very clear understanding of his skillset and how best to use it. i don't think he'd be ignorant of how good he is at something, especially since the direct consequence of his aptitude led him to being a member of the jedi council. pretty hard to be blind to your strengths when you're being asked for your input on topics that directly draw from that knowledge.

averse to healthcare. listen i enjoy obi-wan whump just as much as the next obi-wan stan (the desire to put him in the cosmic salad spinner comes with the territory, i fear) but as a character who grew up in an environment that deeply cares for the well-being of all, and knowing that you cannot help others unless you yourself first have the ability to do so, i can't really see him ignoring injuries outside of combat scenarios. like on the battlefield he's got more pressing concerns than a pesky little shrapnel wound or five, but once the battle's over?? he might not be first in line to the medics but i can't see him avoiding them entirely. an army without a general is working at a sharp disadvantage and i don't think he'd risk his men by neglecting his physical health in that manner. note that i said 'physical'. make of that what you will :)

duty. obi-wan is the definition of a paladin. he takes an oath and by the force he's going to keep it. train the boy? absolutely, qui-gon. whether or not anakin chooses to respect that training is another matter, but he did definitively get knighted! refuse to kill anakin? listen he's handed vader his own ass to him twice post order 66 and each time he did it he did it nonlethally. that takes skill. that takes dedication. exile yourself to tatooine for 19 years and then decide fuck it, we ball, and die after Once Again Deciding Not To Kill Anakin Skywalker? step aside casper, there's a new friendly ghost in town. every time obi-wan commits to something the man COMMITS. you GOTTA respect that grind.

flirty but in the sense that he's going to match the energy someone brings to the table. like he's a negotiator. he knows how to read people and figure out the Vibes. if he thinks the other person will be 1) 100% receptive and 2) will respond with a delightful wit, why the hell not? obi-wan's highest stat is charisma and he's got expertise in persuasion. whether they're allies or not does not factor into this equation. he can have a little flirtation with morally dubious and potentially hostile characters. as a treat.

this has nothing to do with his character but i firmly believe that he and quinlan vos had at LEAST a fling when they were padawans. there is zero evidence to back this up aside from a few comics where they were being goofy teenagers together but i stand by this. it is an unshakeable aspect of obi-wan to me that has only gotten worse with the kenobi show.

no matter what, no matter how terrible or devastating or downright apocalyptic it gets, obi-wan kenobi will never fall to the dark side. never. it won't be easy, but that is a line he has never, and will never cross. i will not hear any "obi-wan touched the dark side during the theed generator fight" slander. if that was true tell me why the force theme was playing during his moment of triumph!!! Would John Williams Lie To Us Like That?? to our face?????

anyways i could go on forever about obi-wan because he is My Ultimate Blorbo but this post is getting super long so i'll leave it there. hope this helped even a little or at the very least was entertaining for you to read <3

#anon #ask #star wars #obi wan kenobi #long post #THIS TOOK. SO LONG TO ANSWER IM SO SORRY LMAO;;;;;;;

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eloquent-edits · 1 month

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🗡️ “I can assure you, we are just friends.”

definitely not something that’s a little more than friends 🗡️ friends with benefits prompts 🗡️ 18+ prompts

While Person A is chatting with their friends, Person B sidles up to A and subtly trails a finger up their spine (does A stutter? go completely silent at the electricity going through their body? start to get red but manage to keep their composure? TELL ME WHAT HAPPENS)

B begs A to not leave any marks because they just can’t let this secret get out

For that beach episode: A takes off their shirt, exposing scratch marks from a recent session… B hides a sly grin as A is questioned about who they’re with

A is very physically affectionate in general, but has fallen into the habit of only bothering B in public with it

^ A wants to interact with B in many ways and just ends up biting their arm jokingly to satiate that desire (yes, their friends think this is weird)

B needs to be held accountable for finishing their work, so A comes over to hang out… they do not get work done for a while

At a party, B can’t help but feel a twinge of jealousy when they spot A flirting with someone

A’s childhood friend is in town and A is super excited to have them meet B (B is quietly panicking over making a good impression and wondering what A has said about them)

A and B are in the same anatomy class and they spend a lot of time studying together (A is most certainly a hands-on learner hehehehe)

“Is that B’s shirt?” “What? Oh, uh, yes… My shirt got dirty the last time I was over there so they’re washing mine for me.”

“Is that A’s shirt?” “Yes. What about it?” “…Does A know you have their shirt?” “Nope!”

They really only planned on the midnight rendezvous, not falling asleep afterwards, so A and B go get morning coffee together (they are both very grumpy but still enjoying each other’s company)

Inside jokes during sexy times bleed into their normal banter, leading to some questionable looks from their friends

A gets a little drunk and B expects them to slip up and expose their true relationship, but instead A is very wholesome and remains steadfast on their boundaries; B is so proud of them for this

B is desperately trying to get something off their mind, so A offers a distraction for the night… it’s Mario Kart and whoever loses owes the other a favor

Any of their plans to go out have to include wiggle room in case they get preoccupied (soon it’s not just B that’s always late to events)

While their friends are occupied in another room, A and B intertwine their bodies and try to stay quiet—key word here is TRY

“I bet A would really like [insert kink here]…” “Nah, they’re not really into that.” “How the fuck do you know that?”

All their friends take the BDSM test as a joke and A and B secretly take notes on what the other person likes/dislikes to make the benefits side better

If given the choice, A will always pick the seat next to B so they can tease them under the table

During a passionate session, A accidentally draws blood while gripping B’s back (A apologizes over and over while tending to B, who just has a shit-eating grin the whole time)

Whenever B cracks yet another terrible joke, A has to refrain from kissing it off their face

A and B take a break from the benefits whenever one of them wants to pursue someone else (your characters can have healthy boundaries and communication!!! I am BEGGING y’all to write characters that actually communicate with each other)

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stuckinapril · 3 months

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what red flags should i look for in a man?

I actually feel like I’m a good person to ask this question, not bc I’ve had a long healthy relationship or anything, but bc I’ve humored walking red flags way more than I should’ve lmao. Btw this list doesn’t go for just men. It can apply to man, woman, or any human being across the board. Ok so:

When someone tells you they’re not ready for a relationship, BELIEVE THEM. Idc what the reason is. Idc if it’s bc they aren’t that into you or if they have shit going on. They just told u straight up. Appreciate that and just leave. Please. For me.

Piggybacking off that point—listen to people when they tell you who they are in general!!! This was a major 2023 lesson for me. People self-report all the time, whether it be friends or romantic interests. Most people are legitimately incapable of hiding who they really are. Pay attention. Do not ignore the signs, however small. I could’ve saved myself so much trouble if I didn’t just pretend Not to See.

Not consoling you when you need it because “they’re not good with emotions.” This is just an excuse for being lazy. They just don’t wanna put the work into being there for you properly—especially if you’ve already gone through the trouble of communicating this to them.

People who talk the talk but don’t walk the walk. Actions over words. Actions over words always.

Fuck overextended talking stages. If you wanna know more about me, let’s plan something in person. Otherwise you run the risk of getting attached to someone who’s possibly nothing like how they actually are in front of you.

If you’re having to “communicate” extensively with a person like a month in, as in there are lots of miscommunications and misunderstandings and things you don’t like about them or they don’t like about you, I’d probably just drop it. I learned this the hard way last year after burning through a lot of friendships where I found that we didn’t know each other that long at all, but there was already a plethora of problems to work through. This can apply to relationships just as well. If you’re asking a person to change this early in, or they’re asking you to change this early in, it’s probably just not a match.

Mostly talking about themselves. Not asking you anything about yourself in return. Ew.

It takes months to actually know a person’s true nature. That’s typically around the time people start showing their true colors. Ik a lot of people choose to commit like a month in, so just take that as u will.

Fucking competing with you. People who’re incapable of just being happy for other people without inserting themselves into it are insufferable. Immediate next.

This isn’t conscious behavior, and all of us are guilty of it, but people have an innate habit of taking advantage of your fantasies. If they know you’re desperate for their attention, they’ll get lazy (even if they don’t realize it). If they know they’re the object of your desire, they will leverage that to get your benefits without putting in the work. This is like playing cards and immediately showing someone your hand. Do not do that. This isn’t “playing hard to get”—it’s just guarding yourself until you’re sure you can trust the other person.

Not always the case, but a lot of times the way someone’s last relationship ended is pretty telling for how yours will go. ESPECIALLY if they’re not at all remorseful about how the last one went down, lol. You’re not the exception.

People are busy and taking a while to respond is O.K., but if it’s a continuous pattern of them taking forever to reply, it’s probably just a matter of priorities (and you’re not theirs). Sorry.

Pls take the ego out of the talking stage and recognize that love bombing is not flattering. I’ve reprogrammed my brain to where any time someone is doing way too much like three seconds in, I get the ick. I’ve legit dropped guys over this. It’s such a red flag to me. They either don’t have a life, or just are a natural love bomber (who will overwhelm you w compliments and attention only to fizzle out just as quickly), or they know exactly what they’re doing and they’re playing to your ego. Whichever it is, ick. Big ick.

The way they talk about other people is a major tell. This goes for friends and romantic interests. I think a bit of gossip will always be unavoidable, but if someone is liberally trash-talking other people—ESPECIALLY EX-FRIENDS OR EX-PARTNERS—you could literally be next. Anyone who thrives off badmouthing other people / hating on others / just generally not giving others grace doesn’t have exceptions. You’re their focus for now. It could just as easily be you tomorrow.

#it’s fucking rough out there. take care #ask #r

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sovenusian · 1 month

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Matured Energy of Each Sun Sign

(does not to relate to what age you are.)

A matured Aries is a master communicator and story teller, they can easily pull and hold the attention of the crowd on them, only this time it is to shine light on something beyond them, and it's usually the wisdom they have gathered on their spiritual journey of having the self as the center of their wants and needs.

A matured Taurus is the tamed bull. They become much more calm and understanding of ways of life and mindsets differing from their own, and don't feel the need to make known, how thorough their stances on their beliefs are. They loosen up a bit, like a Cane Corso allowing a rambunctious chihuahua to feign dominance.

A matured Gemini uses the seemingly fractured personality to create genius works and can masterfully connect with any age group or walk of life. They respect they are the embodiment of "I have an idea" but on drugs (lol) and live in that truth. They don't provide tolerance for what they do not like around them.

A matured Cancer stopped being petty and stops wading in the murky waters of emotional manipulation, and starts wielding these energies as gift, for others. You may not find a more generous, selfless, nurturing being. They have the strength to grow other people and bring what's dead back to life.

A matured Leo finally takes more pride in the impact of it's works, more than the ability to do them or be recognized for being the one to do them. They enjoy showing the character traits that truly make them beautiful. The humility they acquire despite having achieved a great deal of refinement, is what becomes what makes them shine at their brightest.

A matured Virgo learned to put themselves, their hearts truly first. Their dutiful and ambitious drives have taught them their accompanying lessons, which are to allow yourself to relax, you are enough, you really are so damn dope, and comparing your output to the logistics was a stressful way to live and that is, the past. It's a death to criticism and a birth to healthy analyzation.

A matured Libra has learned how to be in love with love, in a healthy way. In love with Real Love; with the raw energy and authenticity of it's energy, that way when humans and opportunities come around that claim to be Love, they can be distinguishing and keep their own heart set on what they have learned to be it's truth. They have mastered detachment.

A matured Scorpio has adjusted their perspective, placing the abilities of being extremely passionate and emotionally intense, only in situations that don't create more chaos. Their lifelong journey for true power has moved them into a space where they are more settled and accomplished. They learn the rhythm of life and can finally become selfless, and this is where their energy is truly it's most powerful.

A matured Sagittarius is the ember stage of fire; warm, spreading and long lasting. The knowledge and philosophies acquired over the years are now steeped, grounded in substance and embedded in a person that can finally sit down long enough, and have the patience, to share it's inspirations. Their habit to be generous and spreading have switched out it's impulsive nature for selectivity and self- preservation.

A matured Capricorn drops the shrewdness, and can be an exemplified patriot of what they stood for when they initially started their ambitious climb of hard earned success. They realize just because they are the goats, does not mean anybody and everything are the rocks and steps to ascend upon, and they warm their heart up enough to trust others with their vulnerabilities. They retire their need to be serious for the upholding of the many responsibilities all Capricorns are dealt, and they let that beautiful ability to entertain and bring joy be what they now lead and corale others with.

A matured Aquarius honors the unbeaten path they chose and created by tooth and nail, by sharing with others the lessons learned from it. Their ability to be friendly and connect with anyone, becomes more filled out, & it becomes harder for them to be perceived as disingenuous, because they can now choose the role they'll play in the life of every individual they meet, and share the gems needed like the sages they were born to be. They feel the freedom to become even more obscure.

A matured Pisces is a vessel of universal love. They spend their lives being a collage of all the human personality could offer, from kind to cruel, yielding to stubborn, and they take each lesson from their colorful experiences, and only extract the most optimistic, high frequency wisdom from them. They keep their mystery while their ability to impart love to others unfolds endlessly.

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imnotevenusin · 7 months

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Some of My Favorite Aspects to see in a Natal Chart

Saturn trine/sextile Pluto : Saturn takes out unnecessary things/people in our lives, while Pluto shows us what has power over us, what gives us power, and control. Usually, this aspect indicates somebody who wants to “bring something to the table” to society; Saturn is serious, and practical, while Pluto is impactful and influential. They take huge responsibilities and never try to abuse their power (unless there are other aspects ofc). A great leadership aspect overall.

Jupiter trine/sextile Neptune (I have this one) : Jupiter is expansion and abundance, and Neptune is limitless, perceptive, imaginative, and artistic. Jupiter expands the Neptunian energy, making a person ego-less, empathetic, charitable, artistic, and a visionary.

Two notable Figures with this aspect(/) include : Martin Luther King Jr. & Kurt Cobain

Mercury sextile/trine/or even conjunct Saturn : Mercury is our communication and problem-solving style and Saturn correlates to discipline. I think this is a powerful aspect, since it indicates a person that doesn’t get distracted, only speaks when needed, and takes on mentally serious and challenging tasks—and they usually follow through.

Moon sextile/trine Saturn : The Moon is our emotional state, how we feel comfortable, and our habits, and when it comes in good contact with Saturn, we get a person thats very responsible and in-control of their emotions—which can make you successful in the long run.

Sun conjunct Venus : Wow, how lucky. The Sun is what we like to revolve our personalities around, our ego, and what we shine a light on through expression, whilst Venus is our charming attributes, tactfulness, and what we are attracted too. This aspect indicates a charming and likable person.

Jupiter sextile/trine Saturn : Jupiter being supported by Saturn is promising to say the least; Jupiter is like hope and Saturn brings that hope into reality, through patience and dedication. It can also indicate a structured life, with never too much un-healthy indulgence (Jupiter) or too much delay or feeling like somethings lacking (Saturn).

North Node trine/sextile Neptune (I have this) : The North Node denotes a part of our lives we have to learn to adapt and Neptune can be imaginative and hopeful. Usually, people with this aspect can utilize Neptunian energy/characteristics to reach their life path; this aspect basically says “follow your dreams”.

Sun trine/sextile Pluto : Generally indicates a strong and invincible ego, that deals with change and losses quite a bit. I know Dave Grohl has this placement, and he’s gone through many changes—from being the “awkward” drummer of Nirvana, to being the frontman of the Foo Fighters.

Mercury sextile/trine Mars : Your communication style is supported by the strong, defensive Mars; your words and messages pack a punch, and you aren’t afraid to speak up for yourself.

Neptune sextile/trine Pluto : The ultimate visionary aspect. Our imaginations and creations give us power, and sometimes influence. This can also be a great aspect for manifestation—look at Michael Jackson, who infamously had a manifestation journal that helped him carve out his public image in the 80s.

#astro observations #astrology #astro community #astro notes #astro placements #astrology observations #birth chart #natal chart #zodiac #jupiter #ascendant #rising sign #spirituality

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morelikeravenbore · 1 month

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✨Sebastian Sallow fluff alphabet

My personal headcanons based on the way I imagine and write Sebastian in How to Make a Villain.

This template is from this post by snowluvs and is definitely worth a read and a reblog! I loooove reading Sebastian headcanons so feel free to write your own, too!

A - Attractive - what do they find attractive about their partner?

We all know that Sebastian has a bit of a savior complex, so he's attracted to a partner who trusts him with their vulnerability by letting him protect them, care for them and fuss over them. However, he also likes a challenge, so someone with a bit of backbone to go with their vulnerability would really pique his interest. It doesn't matter what form that backbone takes, be it academically-focused, impressive duelling prowess, or just someone whose not afraid to call him out when he's acting out of line, Sebastian is undeniably attracted to that spark.

Read on 👇

B - Body - what is their favourite part of their partner’s body?

Given that he craves deep and genuine emotional connection with a partner, he's very drawn to the face: stroking your cheeks, kissing the corners of your mouth, your eyelids, your brows. He finds any excuse to touch your face, whether it be brushing your hair back behind your ear or tenderly wiping food or smudges from your chin with his thumbs. When being intimate, he holds your face between his hands, pressing his forehead to yours, never breaking eye contact.

C - Cuddle - how do they like to cuddle?

Sebastian is a squasher. He needs to feel physically close to you and will often forget this own size and strength in his desperation to hold you closer, closer, closer. He hugs you so tightly you can't breathe, or else lays his entire body weight on top of you when you're lying down together or sharing a bed. You often have to remind him to back up a little lest he squeeze the life outta you with his love.

D - Dates - what does their ideal date look like?

Sebastian is spontaneous and impulsive, but beneath all that bravado and charm, he is also quite afraid of rejection, so he might not always straight out "ask" you on a date. Rather, you might find yourself accidentally having dinner together at the Three Broomsticks, or huddled for hours in a cozy bookshop he "stumbled upon" at random. Sebastian considers any time spent alone with you a date, and would later tease you about how many "dates" you've already been on without ever being asked.

E - Equal - are they the dominant one in the relationship, or rather passive?

Generally speaking, Sebastian has a hard time relinquishing control to another. Given his history, he is used to taking charge, solving problems on his own and shouldering the burdens of everyone he cares about — and it goes without saying that he can be incredibly stubborn about accepting help or support, even when he genuinely needs it. However, this does tend to lead to mental and physical overwhelm; decisions become impossible, his body aches with exhaustion, and sometimes the boy just needs you to baby him — while still giving him the illusion that he has everything under control ;)

F - Fight - would they find it easy to forgive their partner? how are they fighting?

My personal headcanon that Sebastian is a Virgo sun, Aries rising. His Aries means he's reactive and oftentimes at the mercy of his more intense emotions (such as anger, jealousy — being ruled by Mars). He doesn't always communicate in a healthy way, he lashes out, snaps, or jumps to wild conclusions that don't make any sense. However, being a Virgo sun means he's ultimately a caregiver with a deep need to fix things and look after you, so he's very quick to apologise and make things right again.

G - Gifts - how do they feel about gift giving? what are their habits when it comes to this?

His gifts are either very practical (something you'll use every day), or something very sentimental (something that once belonged to his mother).

When it comes to receiving gifts, he doesn't believe he deserves them, so giving him something uselful like an interesting book, a set of quills, or a planner is the best way to spoil him without making him uncomfortable. However, if you gift him something sentimental, or something you made especially for him, he'll treasure it for the rest of his life.

H - Holding Hands - when / how do they like to hold hands?

If this boy can hold your hand, he will hold your hand, and if he can't hold your hand, he'll play with your fingers, trace the lines of your palms, brush his pinky against yours. You're his anchor, and your hands are the easiest part to hold on to.

I - Injury - how would they act if their partner got hurt?

Given his history with his parents and his twin, he is completely overbearing any time you're sick or injured. He'll fuss, worry, devise a strict recovery regime, won't allow you to lift and finger, and make you stay in bed long after you're well again. He'll research cures, studies, information about whatever it is that ails you, and will likely tell you all about it in great detail. This is where that lovely backbone of yours will come in handy, because you'll definitely have to sit him down and tell him to relax.

J - Jealousy - do they get jealous easily? how do they deal with it?

For all his wonderful strengths, Sebastian suffers from insecurities born from a lifetime of losing those he loves. His jealousy stems not from your actions, but from a deep-seated fear that you're eventually going to realise that he's as rotten as he believes himself to be and leave him. He can be a bit much, but communication is key.

K - Kisses - how do they like to kiss their partner?

Sebastian loves to kiss your face aaaall over, but once he gets started, he finds it hard to stop. Boy is a kisser, and he can get messy.

L - Love Language - what’s their love language?

Acts of Service and physical affection. Being useful gives him a sense of purpose, and touching gives him a sense of peace, so expect to be well looked after and loved. When receiving love, he responds just as strongly to physical affection, as well as words of affirmation. Tell him he's appreciated and that he's done a good job, and he'll be yours forever.

M - Mornings - how are mornings spent with them?

If you manage to get him into bed before he falls asleep where ever he's been reading or studying, it's a hard job rousing him again. He likes to cuddle, and you'll usually wake up half squashed under his body or tangled up in his arms and legs. He speaks in grunts and groans rather than words, and has super adorable bed hair. He's also usually very hungry in the mornings, so the promise of breakfast will be the motivation for finally getting him up.

N - Nights - how are nights spent with them?

Sebastian loves staying up late and doesn't need much sleep to function. His brain is always running a million miles a minute, so winding down takes him quite a while. He tells you he does his best work at night when the rest of the world is asleep.

O - Open - when would they start revealing things about themselves? how would they do it?

Typically Slytherin, he's evasive about himself and prefers to know everything about you before he opens up. Further to that, theres a lot of pain in Sebastian's heart that he won't share with anyone unless he trusts them completely. But, as Slytherins go, once he does trust you, he'll trust you unconditionally; his secrets will become yours, and yours his, and nothing short of death or betrayal will ever break that bond.

P - PDA - how comfortable are they with pda?

He's a real cheeky little smart arse about it. He loves you so much that he wants everyone to know about. He'll pick you up and spin you around as a standard greeting, sit you in his lap, kiss you midway through a sentence. Sebastian doesn't do things by halves, and the same goes for being in love.

Q - Quirk - what is a random ability that helps the relationship?

His optimism, his adventurous spirit and unquenchable thirst for knowledge means there's never a dull moment in your relationship. Above all else, Sebastian likes to have fun, and your life together will be full of it.

R - Romance - how romantic are they? cliche or creative?

There is nothing conventional or cliche about Sebastian Sallow. In fact, he thrives on being just the opposite. He probably courted you by acting like he was your boyfriend until suddenly he just was, there was likely never any conversation about being official, and the first time he said he loved you was probably in the middle of a heated argument or else said in a way that implied it was already common knowledge to you. But despite his quirks, Sebastian is hopelessly, singularly and passionately devoted to you — just don't expect any grand or sappy gestures of love.

S - Security - how protective are they?

Sebastian is so overprotective that it borders on being overbearing. Truth is, he's terrified of losing you, the one person he loves more than any other, and is prone to bouts of severe anxiety about your health, your commitment to him, and your general safety. His inability to relax is a point of contention in your relationship, and one that you both need to continually work on overcoming together. Communication is key, even when Sebastian jumps to conclusions and assumes the worst. He's not perfect, but he's trying.

T - Talking - what do they like to talk about?

Being a highly intelligent Slytherin means Sebastian loves getting deep. Nothing excites him more than discussing magical ethics, or taboo subjects like the Dark Arts or the use of the Dementors kiss against prisoners. He's unafraid to argue his point and loves a lively debate, but he has mental capacity to respect all viewpoints — even if they conflict with his own. He yearns to understand the inner workings of the mind and takes great pleasure in trying to understand opinions and perspectives that differ to his own. Any subject that expands or challenges his understanding of the world is taken on with great enthusiasm.

U - Understanding - how well do they know their partner?

He's a fast learner, very observant, and madly in love with you (obviously), so he knows basically everything about you. But sometimes he likes to think he knows you better than you know yourself. He needs to be reminded every so often that you are capable of looking after yourself, and that he doesn't need to solve every little problem on his own without being asked.

V - Vaunt - what are they proud of? do they like to show their partner off?

Aside from his intelligence, his quick wit and his sense of humour, he is most proud of his innate optimism, which (thanks to your help) has remained in tact despite all the tragedies and hardships he's endured in his comparatively short life. But more than that, he's proud to have you by his side: the embodiment of goodness and love that he never believed he deserved.

His egotistical side enjoys showing you off — you are, after all, the most attractive person he's ever seen, and having you by his side gives his confidence a little boost — but he can become a bit possessive or jealous if he's feeling insecure.

W - Whole - would they feel incomplete without their partner?

Abandonment issues and childhood trauma means Sebastian holds his loved ones very, very dear to his heart. Without you, he'd still be the driven, intelligent and ambitious Sallow he was born to be, but he'd likely lose the motivation to reach his full potential. Having lost every important person in his life, his desire to better himself after all his past mistakes is soley inspired by you.

X - XOXO - are they affectionate?

Physical affection is both how he expresses love and how he feels love; physical touch grounds him in reality and reminds him that you are safe and near. Smooth back his hair, tenderly touch his face, or play with his fingers and watch how fast he melts.

Y - Yearning - how well do they cope when they’re separated from their partner?

Since you are his home, he feels incomplete and off-kilter when he's away from you. And though he tries to honour your individuality, if you're apart for too long, he'll start to have intrusive thoughts about every bad thing that might happen if he's not there to protect you. Needless to say, when you are finally reunited, he greets as you if several decades have kept you apart — like a big, needy puppy.

Z - Zzz - what are some sleeping habits of theirs?

This boys sleeping habits are a nightmare, precisely because he has a lot of them. In fact, he actively avoids sleep, preferring to stay up reading or researching until he's tired enough to fall into an immediate slumber. Usually, you'll find him slumped over on a table or still snoring on the couch, still fully clothed, but if you do happen to get him into bed, he can't sleep without some part of his body touching yours.

#sebastian sallow #sebastian sallow oneshot #sebastian sallow fanfic #sebastian sallow headcanon #sebastian sallow fluff #sebastian sallow fluff alphabet #hogwarts legacy #hogwarts legacy fandom #hogwarts legacy sebastian

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stellarsagittarius · 8 months

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🎀 Venus In Synastry: How Do They Express Love 🎀

Masterlist: All my astrology posts at one place

Venus in 1st House

Values the ideas and beliefs of the house person. The house person feels seen by the Venus person. There could be competition involved on who is the better person in terms of style, appearance or attitude, depending on how healthy the relationship is. Venus person is naturally appealing to the house person, whether it's their looks or outlook on life that interests the house person. Venus person feels compelled to present themselves in a polite and well mannered way to the house person. There is a general adoration simply for who the other person is.

Venus in 2nd House

The Venus person sees the house person as someone with the same values, beliefs and habits the Venus person seeks in an ideal partner. Venus is intersted in the House person's finances and assets. Depending on the maturity of both individuals there could be competition regarding who is better, because Venus also rules vanity. Venus and house person admire each other's beauty and mannerisms. Venus is possessive over the house person. Venus' love language towards the house person is to bombard them with gifts or compliments regarding their achievements and possessions. Venus loves to see the house person dressed up ог beautifying their body.

Venus in 3rd House

Venus person is intrigued by the house person's mind and their way & expressing information. There is a lot of communication and exchange of ideas between both indricuals. Venus is like a curious child willing to absorb information about the house person and whatever they think about various subjects. The house person likes to hear the ideas of the Venus person as they view Venus as a gentle and well mannered communicator. Both are likely to plan and brainstorm on many things together, and they will be are a good example of the partners-in-crime archetype.

Venus in 4th House

The Venus person becomes very cozy and private around the house person. This is a placement of vulnerability and feeling "at-home" with the other person. There is a mutual understanding & appriciation of each other's past and childhoods. The connection is built on a shared comfort-zone. Venus loves to do activities with the house person that are only "between them" or super private. When these relationships end it feels as though they left all their deepest secrets & emotions with the other. This is also a relationship, built on shared beliefs and roots.

Venus in 5th House

This is one of the "good" placements to have in synastry, since Venus is in it's 'joy' in the 5th house. This is the house of creativity, children and pleasure. The Venus person enjoys being around the house person while taking on playful dates and spending time simply enjoying life. It is a very romantic and lighthearted placement which causes a lot of passion for the house person, through Venus' eyes. There could be a major involvement with children in the relationship. There is passion and a lot of sex involved. It is the adrenaline filled romance that takes you back to fun teenage years.

Venus in 6th House

With the 6th house, whatever planet falls here, facilitates some sort of change in the routines or work ethic of the house person. Venus signifies a smooth intermingling of routines, lifestyles and work habits. Venus person has a genuine appriciation for the house person's dedication and thoughtfulness regarding their physical enviorment & how they make the best use out of it. Laziness or putting off tasks might cause turn-offs or pet peeves from Venus' perspective. The two individuals like to generally plan things and value a proper schedule in their relationship. Both end up as part of each other's daily lives in some way.

Venus in 7th House

Venus in the 7th house is a good placement as astrologers call it "the soulmate aspect." The whole essence is rooted in the very experience of being in a relationship. The Venus Person sees house person as their ideal partner. These are very strong connections, as the attraction is very apparent. They tend to understand each other naturally and act as a companion with each other. Venus is well aware of the feelings of House Person. They are seen as & "ideal" lovers. Often a conventionally attractive couple and easily acceptable by others because the connection is too strong to be hidden away.

Venus in 8th House

This might be a little dark and tricky placement to deal with. This house is about intense transformation, bonds and deep attachments. Venus feels it stronger. There is a mystery surrounding the house person that Venus can't seem to wrap its head around. The more time Venus spends around House, the more it is transformed, whether mentally, emotionally or physically. They bring an intense amount of karma and change into each other's lives, and not always this is the best placement for synastry, unless its backed up by stronger & more grounded placements. The energy is strong and when these relationships end the individuals aren't the same anymore.

Venus in 9th House

These are fun filled relationships that also teach you plenty of new things. The best friends who live to learn from each other & teach each other about the world at large. Frequent travels, connections with other cultures or countries is very prominent in these relationships. These are more light-hearted relationships where house person becomes a student under the Venus person. House person ends up learning about life and philosophy through Venus. Venus on the other hand appriciates the enthusiasm and outlook on life, of the house person. These individuals expand each other's horizons.

Venus in 10th House

This is one of the houses. where the energy of Venus is felt strongly. But it's more outward focused that inward (meaning the matters of work, reputation and actions matter more than the actual relationship itself). With this aspect, the relationship has much publicity and the couple tends to be popular in some way or the other. Venus is focused on guiding or being a mentor to the house person. Likely, Venus also opens up plenty of opportunities for the house person. The relationship thrives on career achievement and the recognition it gets. Both are concerned with the public image & reputation of the each other which may lead to pretty shallow connections sometimes.

Venus in 11th House

The eleventh house is generally good for business partnerships and friendships. Regardless it can be a really romantic house as well! The Venus person is like the guiding north star that the house person looks and wishes upon. The Venus opens up a lot opportunities for the house person that are for reaching milestones and accomplishing long term plans. There is an energy of friendship that is built on a solid ground of shared interests and common goals. Venus values the ideas of the house person and both set to fulfil them, together. Venus is like a good luck charm. Both act as a team when on good terms, but on bad terms it may become rivalry.

Venus in 12th House:

This might be the house attached with karma, undoings, the unconsious, but when Venus is placed in this house it becomes mysteriously appealing to the house person. But there is karma attached to it, so this relationship will end up closing some cycles from the past. Venus is a benefic so the entire experience wouldn't be as hard (unless there are other aspects), but it can quickly become obsessive or a lot of subtle clues can go unnoticed. There is a more telepathic communication in which both can pick up subtle body clues or things that are not as easily apparent to other people, about each other. A lot of healing takes places due to this relationship, depending on how Venus is placed (positively/negatively aspected).

Hope you enjoyed it! Stay tuned for more Astrology content ✈️✨️!!

#astrology #astrology readings #natal chart reading #synastry chart reading #astrology chart readings #astrology husband #future spouse #natal chart

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mysoullanguage · 2 years

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#0009 a planet’s strongest & weakest °

sun —

strongest: 5°, 9°, 10°, 17°, 29°. strong self of identity and values. respect towards the self and others. extroverted and very expressive of their traits. good relationship with the father; high self-esteem, self-belief. very confident in personal abilities.

weakest: 7°, 11°, 19°, 23°. key issues to do with identity instability, issues with the father, issues with not having clear goals and ambitions in life. lonely and likes to be alone too much. heavily introverted. has difficulty expressing the sign’s traits.

— 🌸 — 🌸

moon —

strongest: 3°, 15°, 21°, 26°, 27°, 28°. strong emotional and logical balance. is playful and wears their heart on their sleeve. sensitive and empathetic; emotionally wise. mothers others. good relationship with the mother.

weakest: 8°, 10°, 20°, 22°. failure to rationalise emotion. issues with the mother, fear of vulnerability, emotional turmoil, emotional dissatisfaction.

— 🌸 — 🌸

mercury —

strongest: 0°, 3°, 15°. clear communication and ability to perceive and understand complex information. rational and realistic, but not excessively. good relationship with money and siblings. seeks to know more, constantly. open-minded and a team player.

weakest: 9°, 12°, 21°, 24°. failure to articulate reasoning and emotion clearly; disconnect from rationality and emotion; issues with siblings. failure to have independent opinions and thoughts. arrogant and opinionated. does not enjoy learning.

— 🌸 — 🌸

mars —

strongest: 1°, 8°, 10°, 13°, 20°, 22°, 25°. clear ambitions and goals in life. athletic and healthy; is not lazy. channels anger and emotion healthily. has little to no issues with men. is not sexually frustrated. does not lack self-esteem.

weakest: 2°, 4°, 7°, 14°, 16°, 19°, 26°, 28°. impulsive habits and excessive energy that’s improperly channeled; anger issues, laziness, unpredictability. low ambitions and self-esteem. issues with men.

— 🌸 — 🌸

venus —

strongest: 2°, 7°, 19°, 26°, 27°. unique fashion style. very social but knows to enjoy personal space and time. strong personal boundaries in relationships/in general. doesn’t seek external validation. strong self-esteem. good relationship with money.

weakest: 1°, 8°, 13°, 20°, 25°. issues with past partners, low self-esteem, issues with money. may be vain and attention-seeking. nonexistent social life, lonely life, bad experiences with friends.

— 🌸 — 🌸

jupiter —

strongest: 4°, 9°, 12°, 16°, 21°, 24°, 28°. strong faith in the self and others. clear spiritual/religious views. the person is a gambler in life but no excessively; they have faith in the universe. broad view on cultures; enjoys travelling and learning and exchanging information with others

weakest: 3°, 6°, 10°, 15°, 18°, 22°, 27°. over-gambling and putting too much faith into the unknown. not being able to plan. having issues with spirituality and faith; feeling lonely from religious beliefs; egotistical and a know-it-all

— 🌸 — 🌸

saturn —

strongest: 7°, 10°, 11°, 19°, 22°, 23°. strong personal boundaries, sense of authority, and relationship with money. strong self-worth and discipline. hard-working and virtuous. family-oriented and traditional. strong values and morals

weakest: 1°, 4°, 5°, 13°, 16°, 17°, 25°, 28°, 29°. key issues with personal boundaries and sense of responsibility; inability to enact personal change; fear of publicity, fear of independence, fear of change.

— 🌸 — 🌸

uranus —

strongest: 8°, 11°, 20°, 23°. rebellious and unafraid to enact change. strong self-esteem and sense of identity. unafraid of showing originality, honesty, and authenticity. unafraid to be a leader; is compassionate for others’ suffering. independence and highly resourceful

weakest: 2°, 5°, 14°, 17°, 26°, 29°. inability to enact progress in society and in the personal life; fear of public opinion. key issues to do with independence and personal freedom and originality. lonely social life or little friends. toxic relationships with friends.

— 🌸 — 🌸

neptune —

strongest: 4°, 12°, 16°, 24°, 28°. strong connection to the psyche and emotion. ability to dream and act on those dreams. healthy relationship between reality and the fantasy world. compassion for others. healthy channels of artistic gifts.

weakest: 6°, 10°, 18°, 22°. fear of reality and responsibility. fear of commitment. disillusion with fantasies and false dreams. escapism through excessive dreaming, sleep, and substance abuse. disconnect from reality. laziness and extreme solitude.

— 🌸 — 🌸

pluto —

strongest: 0°, 13°, 14°, 29°. transformative change. evolution of the soul/spirit. religious and spiritual awakening. transformation of the shadow side. renewal of identity. the person has little to no issue seeing the harsh reality of personal change. there is no resistance to change.

weakest: 2°, 11°, 14°, 23°, 26°. fear of change, abandonment, and transformation. fear of new beginnings and endings. fear of vulnerability and shadow traits. strong distaste of publicity — there is a deep need to be truly alone and isolated.

#astro notes #astro observations #astrology

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meowzfordayz · 1 year

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when you're apart

Author’s Note: is my Sanemi favoritism showing? 🤍 Spoiler Alert: yes. 😂 Don’t mind my psychology major brain showing ~a bit too. 🤓

when you’re apart

Hashira x Reader

Word Count: ~1,300

CW: anxiety disorder, explicit language, mild sexual content

Emergency Request Fulfilled: I was wondering if you could do how the men hashira react to a female reader with separation anxiety

I have a fear of being alone which makes me very clingy. My longtime boyfriend recently broke up with me due to me being “to much to deal with.”

Being clingy is such a bother I know I just hate being alone

~faqs~

When you’re apart…

… Gyomei doesn’t mind receiving calls from you throughout the day. He’s endlessly patient, always willing to listen, and warns you in advance if he can’t talk for long. His strategy for setting and respecting boundaries? Planning ahead and communicating his availability to make sure you feel prioritized and included in his decision making, while still fulfilling his own wants and needs.

… Obanai dislikes it as much as you do, but is ~somewhat more subtle about it. He, at least, has Kaburamura to keep him company, but kissing you is decidedly more pleasant. He’s mindful about maintaining healthy boundaries and expectations—he knows codependency shouldn’t be romanticized—but he’s also so wholly in love with you, that sometimes he gives up and surprises you anyway. “Obanai? You’re two hours early?? Are you okay???” He nods sheepishly, already pulling you into a hug, “I’m fine. Missed you.” “Is Sanemi going to complain to me the next time I see him?” you sigh, scrunched grin revealing your contentment despite the exasperation in your tone. “Probably, I don’t care. I left him enough to cover more than my share of the tab.”

… Mitsuri totally understands your anxiety, and is lovingly firm about ensuring you don’t slip into unhealthy habits. “You can text me anytime, but only call if there’s an emergency, okay?” she murmurs, pressing a soft kiss to your earlobe. You nod slightly, resisting the urge to pout. “I’ll be home before you know it.” Even though it stings, you know it’s never personal. Her willingness to draw straightforward boundaries, as well as her willingness to cross them if you’re truly upset, are just another reason to cherish her.

… Shinobu checks in every couple of hours. Sometimes it’s just a single sentence text, other times a quick call, but she knows how important feeling connected is to you. It’s important to her too, of course, but she’s apt to lose track of time when she’s at the hospital or her lab—she enjoys her work—so she puts in conscious effort to be proactive about your anxiety. When she anticipates a busier or longer day, she’ll ask, “Is it okay if I only check in during meals today?” Generally, you’ll reassure her that, “Absolutely, I’m so proud of you,” and if you’re having a low day, then she always figures out a compromise with you before she leaves.

… Kyojuro unknowingly reassures you, because—apparently—everything reminds him of you. Whether it’s a photo of a flower shortly after he arrives at work Pretty flower, but you’re prettier 🌻, a photo of the sky during his lunch break The cloud formations remind me of you, so soft and mesmerizing ☁️, or a blurry selfie as he finally heads home for the day Cannot wait to see you! 😁, you’re kept in the loop. The one time his phone fell into a puddle (he was trying to photograph a reflection of willow branches Elegant and dreamy, like you 🌿), he immediately visited the nearest shop to borrow their landline Hi, yes, how are you today? Would it be possible for me to make a call? I am happy to purchase something. I would just like to tell my partner that I will be unavailable for the day.

… Sanemi often forgets to explicitly text, call, or otherwise contact you. He doesn’t mean to aggravate your anxiety: he just doesn’t quite ~get it, and assumes it stems from insecurity or jealousy — which also confuses him. “You have nothing to worry about. How could I fall in love with someone else when I’m already in love with you?” he snorts, lightly tapping your nose. “That’s not…” you bite at your lip, unsure how to explain yourself. “I’m not big on texting, you know that. It’s not that I specifically dislike texting you.” You smile despite yourself, eyes rolling fondly, “I know it’s not specific to me.” “So then what’s the issue?” he’s determined to understand. “I’m afraid of being alone,” you shrug, gesturing vaguely, “Don’t worry about it. It’s nothing.” Arms crossing, he leans in, forehead bumping yours, voice warm and low on your skin as you gulp, “It’s okay to be afraid of things, and being afraid isn’t nothing.” Arms uncrossing, he settles his hands on your hips, kneading gently as he pulls back slightly, fixing an even gaze on your flushed expression, “I can’t be with you all the time, but I can promise that I love you and think about you.” “All the time?” you ask quietly. It’s his turn to blush, eyes closing as he dips his face into your neck, muttering softly, “All the damn time.”

… Muichiro is a bit absentminded, and rarely thinks to check his phone, but he sets reminders—around noon, and later in the afternoon—to make up for it. If he’s occupied and misses his usual look-at-his-phone time(s), then he’s never bothered by a call from you coming through (besides your number, his phone’s always on Do Not Disturb). In the bathroom? He’ll pick up. About to bite into his lunch? He’ll put it aside. Presenting during a meeting? He’ll literally answer his phone mid sentence, and leave the room (creative liberty: thank gosh he’s the boss hah). He’s aware of his head-in-the-clouds tendencies, just as he’s aware of your anxiety, and feels that having a specific routine is perfectly fair: if he forgets to uphold his end of your expectations, then you’ve every right to remind him. Conversely, if he’s feeling overwhelmed, he’s more than capable of reasserting his own needs — an infinite practice of mutual respect and taking necessary space.

… Giyuu feels uneasy too, but his discomfort stems primarily from how most people tend to socially drain him — you’re one of few that he can feel both stimulated and rested around. Therefore, if it’s a spend-time-with-you versus spend-time-around-others situation, then he’d prefer to be with you. Spend-time-with-you versus spend-time-by-himself situations are more complicated. It takes a lot of discussion, some heavy evenings apart, and tense evenings together, but you gradually nurture a shared understanding and acceptance of your varying needs. He’s always happy to reassure you that I’m not upset with you, nor am I tired of you; I’m just tired, while you’re slowly learning to trust him and his commitment to loving you.

… Tengen could care less about how clingy you are. Super duper clingy? He loves it. Not clingy at all? He’s cool and confident — he knows you adore him as much as he adores you. His easygoingness, however, isn’t the most productive in terms of processing and reducing your overall anxiety. In fact, you eventually have to tell him that he shouldn’t answer your texts or calls immediately, every single time, without a hint of irritation, because it reinforces your self soothing behaviors. “But I’m happy to?!” he grins, kissing the top of your head. “I know, and I appreciate you,” you chuckle, tucked snugly into his side, “But I don’t want to feel afraid of being alone-” “Sooo don’t be alone!” he interrupts enthusiastically, “Again, I’m happy to keep you company!” Inhaling deeply, you gently grip his jaw, a silent request for him to focus, “And again, I appreciate you, but sometimes I have to feel afraid to stop feeling afraid. If I’m never alone, then I can’t ever feel afraid,” hesitating, voice softer now, “And I know you’ll promise to never leave me, but shit happens. Y’know?” He’s silent, maroon eyes steady and tender as he holds your gaze. Before you can nervously murmur Tengen?, he touches his nose to your forehead, still smiling. “I love you. I’ll do my best to help, even from a distance.” “Well don’t go too far away,” you quip. “Of course not,” he laughs, “I’ll just go wherever you tell me to,” declared earnest and true.

#hashira x reader #preferences #modern au #kimetsu no yaiba #demon slayer #gyomei x reader #obanai x reader #mitsuri x reader #shinobu x reader #kyojuro x reader #sanemi x reader #muichiro x reader #giyuu x reader #tengen x reader

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yongislong · 1 year

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clingy partner + dreamies.

genre: fluff, nonidol!dreamies with a clingy partner and vice versa... ish?

note: tysm anon! im sorry this took so long, i've been so busy TT not proofread pls... b kind </3 lol

mark... would actually melt. likes being adored in a way thats different from the usual praise and skinship he receives from the people around him. he gives you a certain ability to be able to be clingy in ways others can't if that makes sense? doesn't have a preference on when you're clingy with him, he just loves that you hang onto him constantly. always encourages you to love up on him, especially if people make backhanded comments and he sees you slowly pulling away?? he hates that sm! would honestly want his own space sometimes because he's always busy, but never ever makes you feel like you're a burden or a chore

renjun... i don't know if he would like it too much! everyone adores him all the time and yes having a partner is different than him hanging out with the neos but i honestly think he just likes everything to be private and pretty basic. that's not to say he doesn't like you being clingy or won't be clingy to you back, he just prefers to have you in private. likes it when he senses you need him and he feels very wanted in a sense that you always seem to want to touch him and follow him around. usually doesn't mind it because you're not invasive about it. sets healthy boundaries though!

jeno... loves it. oh my god i feel like he would want a clingy parter. he's on the quieter side so someone to just sit with him and wrap themselves around him like a koala while he just goes on about his day just, sounds so nice and appealing?? loves it when you follow him around like a lost kitten... he pats you on the head as a reward each time, v wholesome overall! especially likes you being clingy in public because he lives and breathes to show you off like UGH and when you're not afraid to show the world how obsessed with him you are??? ugh! you sitting on his lap while he games?? feels as though he won at life

haechan... oh my god, its so hard to be clingy with him because he's already so clingy with you. he reminds me of those high school and university boys who like tease you sm but are always so sweet and look like a puppy and you can't help but... adore them?! and he thinks if you the same way. honestly if you're usually really clingy, he adores it regardless and you both are in your own lovey little world 90% of the time BUUT if you usually aren't and start being clingy with him out of the blue, oh he will never let you live it down

jaemin... takes it as an opportunity to baby you to the max!! if he had a partner i think, since his moods vary sm and he's more of an ambivert, he would want to gauge how clingy and lovey he would be to his partner whenever he would get into those moods, so when he sees you being clingy, he takes that as an open to be doting to you and he also finds himself getting into a cutesy mindset?? as well? really enjoys you in general and he's a pretty touchy person himself and i think he would especially be a fond of clinginess if he is in love with someone the way he loves you. a cuddler for sure

chenle... one of his favorite things about you hehe. likes to feel like a big man yknow, i've said this before LOL but its true!! i will say though he seems to me like the type of person who likes his alone time and personal space but does allow you to cling to him because... its YOU! and he has a very soft spot for you. but also, like renjun, makes it a point to communicate when he wants his own space. and he is very good at not making you feel bad about it, just offers different alternatives so he doesn't get like... overstimulated

jisung... is used to people being lovable and adoring but... this is so different like, you want to pepper his face with KISSES??? oh my gosh. doesn't mind you being clingy but never knows how to handle it especially in the beginning of you guys dating. learns your clingy habits and comes to adore the way you treat him when you lean towards a more doting mood like UGHHH and if you're shorter than him?? and he just looks down at you while you smile lovingly with your arms wrapped around him GAHHH. likes back hugs from you when you're extra clingy. he is obsessed with you and slowly becomes equally as clingy

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queenofcoquette · 6 months

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advice for teens

introduction:

hey loves! i know that being a teenager sucks, but i want to give some tips on what helps me. obviously some things might not apply to you and ik that we all have different lives. these are just general tips!

getting your priorities:

the first thing is thinking about what you need to focus on. such as:

doing your best in school

being involved in extracurriculars/sports

having hobbies

developing healthy habits

plan for the future! what're you going to do after high school? how can you accomplish that?

physical health:

STOP skipping breakfast! idc if ur short on time or don't have an appetite, me neither, but i always have oatmeal in the morning. it's quick, cheap and it doesnt make me feel nauseous. breakfast is important for your body so pls start ur day right.

make a workout routine. exercise is so good for your body, and starting now is easier than starting when ur older. i like to do home workouts, lift small weights and go on walks!

drink enough water! most americans are dehydrated so ik that this is a big problem. read about WHY you need to stay hydrated and what it does for your body, then get enough water.

getting enough sleep. ik life can get in the way, but if u just scroll on ur phone for hour instead of sleeping you need to work on that! go to bed earlier and earlier gradually.

go outside. get sunlight and fresh air everyday, sit in your yard or deck, or just open a window. but dont spend all day everyday cooped up in ur room.

mental health

keep a vent journal. THIS is so helpful. i use loose paper in a binder and whenever i get rlly stressed or just feel like shit i write down all of my negative thoughts. (then i throw it out) this helps you clear your head and regulate emotions so you can approach problems in a healthy way.

communication!!! learn to communicate with the people in your life- its crucial for all types of relationships. learn how to disagree in a respectful way, how to voice how you feel, etc.

obviously therapy is the best route but ik a lot of people either cant afford it or aren't allowed to receive it by their parents. :/

school:

have a to-do list

create a study routine that's attainable.

have a calendar to write down when you have tests, quizzes, etc.

research college admissions. create a plan.

join extracurrcular activities. good for college admissions and making friends.

avoid drama. this is obvious ig but just don't tell everyone your business, or your thoughts on every person/situation. drama just creates way too much stress. be mindful of who you hang out with and how you treat other people.

outside of school:

be aware. learn about whats going on in your country and in the world. dont be oblivious to current events and whats happening, pay attention!

reflect. i like to take time to reflect- i think about my goals and ask myself what steps im taking towards reaching them. i reflect on my behavior, how i can be a better person, how im feeling, etc.

have hobbies. find things you enjoy and can do in your spare-time. i spend a lot of my free time reading, sewing, or doing something along those lines and it makes me feel good.

getting a part-time job. getting a job helps you learn saving skills, real-world experience and is just good overall in the long run.

ik that being a teenager can be hard becuz ur emotions are all over the place, ur stressed about ur future and ur not a kid but also not an adult. it's a weird time but you can make it *better* through being healthier, being mindful and making good decisions. wishing u all the best :)

#that girl #that girl 2023 #self improvement #pink pilates princess #queenofcoquette #study motivation #healthy habits

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atravesty · 12 days

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Relationship Advice from the Universe

If you're currently experiencing conflicts within your romantic relationship, there may be some guidance meant for you below (please heart/share/follow if this resonated with you):

Pick a Crystal - 1. Brown Goldstone, 2. Dragon's Blood, 3. Aquarmarine

Pile 1 - Brown Goldstone

Ambition, Inspiration/Creativity, Power, Confidence

Tarot: Hermit, Tower, 3 of Pentacles, 10 of Pentacles Reverse

"Stop caring about what they think. This is your life to love and live!"

You may have recently had a falling-out with your love interest, resulting in a need to undergo drastic changes for the best of both yourself and the relationship (or vice versa, please take what resonates). One, or both of you, may have chosen separation after realizing the foundation of the relationship was unstable. You are being called to re-examine and challenge your current foundations; this includes your belief systems, engrained habits, perceptions of self and the world, and everything else that once defined your identity. You may be feeling overwhelmed, and are being called to retreat from external influences for a period of self-reflection to develop a new perspective that will allow for a new, healthier foundation to be built between the both of you. You are being encouraged to seek your inner wisdom through meditation, or other means of contemplation. Think creatively and develop the confidence to make the meaningful changes in your life, however painful, as that will ultimately benefit you in the long run. If there are people in your life that you can trust to collaborate with, such as your love interest, you are being supported in doing so to facilitate collective growth and expansion. You are being warned not to focus excessively on material items, wealth, and status, as this was likely an unhealthy pattern that was detrimental to the relationship that you need to release. Does this fixation stem from insecurities regarding your self worth or scarcity mindset?

Pile 2 - Dragon's Blood

Courage, Adaptability, Healing/Regeneration, Balancing

Tarot: King of Pentacles, Queen of Pentacles Reversed, King of Cups Reversed, Lovers

"You could use some self care time. Like now. Schedule it in."

You may identify as someone who feel secure and comfortable within their lifestyle, full of material and emotional abundance, and able to extend that wealth to your love interest to provide for them as well. You've likely had to undergo a lot of personal growth to achieve your level of success and prosperity, and understand how arduous this journey can be. Despite your generous nature, you may be dealing with a partner/love interest that is currently distant and withdrawn, both from you and their own emotions, resulting in a stagnant relationship (I'm getting that this is likely the early stages of a new connection). You are being called to stop overextending your energy and resources to them, as this is enabling them to remain stagnant in their own growth and causing an imbalance within yourself as well. Personal growth doesn't happen overnight and this can't happen if they still have access to you in the same capacity. Your love interest may be dealing with many burdens that are causing them to withdraw from this connection, and though you likely want to help, this is an opportunity for the two of you to practice self care separately. Healthy boundaries are required for the longevity of this relationship. You must have a healthy balance of giving & receiving, as they are ultimately the one responsible for allowing themselves to be emotionally forthcoming and invested in this relationship.

Pile 3 - Aquamarine

Hope, emotional clarity, spiritual growth/enlightenment, communication

Tarot: 5 of Swords Reversed, 9 of Swords, 10 of Swords Reversed, High Priestess

"Live your life with both feet in. Commit fully to being here."

You may have recently experienced a conflict with your love interest in which they deceived you in some way. They may not have been honest with you about how they feel about you, causing either separation or preventing a relationship from forming to begin with. You are likely not in communication with your love interest at this time, or your communication with them is limited. They have come to the realization that their dishonesty resulted in a lose-lose situation, and wishes to apologize and reconcile with you, however, their intense feelings of regret and despair about their previous actions is preventing them from reaching out to you. You are being called to allow them to surrender to hitting rock-bottom, as this is the only way they can truly begin their recovery and return with a stable offer. Take this is as an opportunity for both of you to heal. They may be going through some sort of spiritual awakening, or at least beginning to become more connected with their intuition, which is guiding them to develop a new perspective to make the proper steps towards you. You and your love interest may both be experiencing dreams, synchronicities, or other gut feelings related to one another, which could indicate a deeper level soul connection between you two. You are being encouraged to relinquish any need to control the trajectory of this relationship and remain hopeful, even if you are not currently in communication with your love interest, and trust that the Universe will align you both in divine timing.

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wing-ed-thing · 5 months

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Jean Kirstein Relationship Headcanons

Tags/Warnings: No Reader Pronouns

𓆃 All around a fairly well-rounded partner who will treat you right in a simple, low-drama but loving relationship.

𓆃 Jean is the kind of guy who thinks he already knows it all, especially if it's his first relationship. Most of this has to do with his mom, who raised him "to be a gentleman."

𓆃 Buying chocolates, flowers, holding the door open, walking closest to the road on the sidewalk, and paying the bill to name a few, Jean has a strict list of behaviors that he's already designated as his to perform in a relationship.

𓆃 It'll surely throw him for a loop if you don't want him to do any of them, especially if your relationship leans on the more non-traditional side.

𓆃 But no matter the dynamic or how you present in a relationship, Jean continues to function with his own idea of "chivalry."

𓆃 Throwing your card or cash out to pay the bill on one of your first few dates will surely throw a wrench in your night.

𓆃 And it's not that Jean thinks that "you think he's weak" or is insecure that you might "have a higher income," but it comes more from the fact that he had a specific idea of how things were going to go and Jean isn't great at readjusting.

𓆃 He's upset and semi-moody the rest of the night because Mama Kirstein taught him that he's supposed to get the bill, but how the hell is he going to bring that up? He can't.

𓆃 Not to mention if his finances are a lot lower than he anticipated. He wants to pay, but who else isn't embarrassed by their card declining?

𓆃 He's not attached to an unhealthy extent to the concept of being a man (or masculinity in general), but it is very important to him and a part of who he is.

𓆃 While this correlated to physical strength and status to him in his youth, as he grows older, this will manifest as healthy self-grooming, confidence in his communication skills, and emotional sharing, using language that doesn't denigrate others, and strong and inclusive leadership skills.

𓆃 And it's important to note that Jean's idea of being a man also strongly correlates to taking care of and caring for you.

𓆃 He's especially skilled at baking, and prides himself on making meals for you. Whether it's baked goods for special occasions or little treats like breakfast in bed, Jean enjoys using his skill in the kitchen to surprise you.

𓆃 Even if his surprises are impractical. You might have to tell him that while some of his gestures are thoughtful, they aren't practical.

𓆃 Breakfast in bed means you have to change the sheets because crumbs got everywhere. His running you a nice bath with flower petals was thoughtful, but you had just seen the largest insect you had ever seen in your entire life and you think it ran to hide in the towels.

𓆃 He gets a bit down on himself the same way you paying for your date would. Where he almost sees it as a personal failure. That he wants to do nice things for you and it's embarrassing when he doesn't hit the mark.

𓆃 Jean has a bad habit of inadvertently taking this out on you by becoming quiet and pouting, making you regret saying anything. That's a conversation to have.

𓆃 And sometimes he's misguided about what he thinks is best: for you, for himself, and for both of you.

𓆃 Sometimes, he'll fixate on something "chivalrous" to an annoying extent.

𓆃 Perhaps he notices you're walking on the street side of the sidewalk, he might grab you by the shoulders and physically move you to the other side saying, "Nope, wrong side."

𓆃 That might be annoying to you, and you'll have to remind him multiple times to stop.

𓆃 That's one thing that might be concerning to you, is when he locks into something, he needs to be told multiple times before he actually listens to you.

𓆃 He also has a hard time setting boundaries with his mother, so hope you have a good relationship with Mama Kirstein.

𓆃 Overall, Jean clearly cares about you very much. He's just a little slow when it comes to change and admitting when one thing isn't the answer to everything.

𓆃 It might take you both some time to adjust to and communicate how you want your relationship to operate, but once Jean understands what you need, you'll never want for anything.

Thank you to all who liked, reblogged, followed, and supported. Your support means so much and is greatly appreciated.

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