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thelastspeecher · 4 years

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Spirit Touched - Chapter 1: Little Prince

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 AO3

Uhhhh so this is the first time I’ve written and posted something for ATLA, and of course it wound up being because of a fanart of a fanfic that I adore. Basically, yesterday I saw this art drawn by my pal @agent-jaselin. And that art appeared to apply one of my all-time favorite tropes (de-aging) to one of my all-time favorite fics (Salvage, by @muffinlance). And dagnabit, I...got inspired.

So, without further ado, here is my interpretation of a theoretical Zuko being de-aged after Chapter 8 of Salvage. Enjoy.

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Praying to the spirits for guidance was a mistake. Hakoda could see that now. He pinched the bridge of his nose in a vain attempt to dispel the headache already forming.

This is what I get for thinking the spirits might make things easier. Their actions are rarely convenient for us mortals.

“Bring him to Kustaa,” Hakoda said after a moment. Toklo nodded and hurried for the healer’s room, his friend in his arms, buried in a pile of furs. Bato looked at Hakoda. He raised an eyebrow silently.

“That’s new,” he said. The casual tone made Hakoda’s headache pound in full force. Bato was treating this as just another matter of fact. Like seeing the former Prince of the Fire Nation reduced to a toddler overnight was just as common as…

Hakoda’s head hurt too much to even think of something that was common.

“Yes,” Hakoda finally said. “It is new.” He was struggling to align the grumpy teenager of yesterday with the toddler he’d just seen drooling in his sleep.

“How could this have happened?” Bato asked quietly.

“I asked the spirits for help last night.” Hakoda scowled. It was help he’d desperately needed, after Zuko had broken down in front of him and renounced his crown, maybe even renounced his own nation. And it was help he was obviously not getting. “Apparently, they didn’t want to make things easier.”

“The spirits work in mysterious ways,” Bato said. “It’s best to trust in their judgement. Eventually, you’ll understand why they’ve done…this.” Hakoda eyed his second-in-command.

“Since when are you so spiritual?”

“Since meeting the bridge between the spirit world and ours,” Bato said flatly.

“Fair enough.” Hakoda sighed. “I should go speak with Kustaa.”

“I might be best if you were there when the little prince woke up,” Bato agreed. He thumped Hakoda on the back. “At least you’re good with children!”

-----

Unlike every other day since he’d recovered from his illness, Zuko didn’t wake up with the sun. If he didn’t remember how much his own children slept at this age, Hakoda would have been concerned. He sat in the infirmary, having a hushed conversation with Kustaa while Zuko continued to snore. The sight of a toddler swimming in furs was painfully cute and reminded Hakoda of when Sokka was young.

“I’ll be able to get a better examination done once he’s awake,” Kustaa said in a low voice. “But from what I can tell, he’s perfectly healthy.”

“He’s a toddler,” Hakoda said.

“A healthy one.” Kustaa glanced at Zuko. “By my estimation, about four years old. So, almost out of the toddler years.” Zuko rolled over in his sleep, mumbling something. Kustaa and Hakoda held their breaths. Zuko didn’t wake up. “From what he’s told me, he didn’t get that scar until a few years ago, so I’m not completely sure why he still has it.”

“The spirits are testing me,” Hakoda moaned. Kustaa chuckled.

“No, Chief. The spirits are testing all of us with this stunt.” He sighed and leaned back. “Now would be a good time to have a waterbending healer, to examine his spirit and chi. But the odds of finding one of those…”

“Aren’t good unless we stumble across a Northern Tribe ship,” Hakoda said, finishing the healer’s sentence. Kustaa nodded. There was movement from Zuko’s pile of furs. Hakoda and Kustaa looked over. A small hand fought its way out, followed by a head. Zuko’s regular scowl was replaced by confusion as he stared at Hakoda and Kustaa, who most likely seemed larger to him than they had yesterday.

“You’re up,” Kustaa said calmly. Zuko shoved away the furs he was buried in. His eyes widened at the sight of his body. Hakoda grimaced.

There was a split second of dumbfounded silence before the screaming started.

-----

Kustaa wasn’t sure whether he preferred Zuko like this or not. On the one hand, it would be difficult to run the ship with a literal toddler on board. But on the other hand, it was much easier to handle Zuko. He could literally be picked up and carried somewhere else if needed.

“This doesn’t fit right!” Zuko whined. Kustaa glanced over at his young charge. Zuko had insisted on dressing himself in the smallest shirt they could find on the ship. That smallest shirt came down to past his feet.

Then again, so will everything else. Kustaa beckoned Zuko to come. Zuko scowled but walked over. Kustaa fought back an amused grin at the firebender’s toddling gait. While not as severe as it would be for someone younger, it was still evident.

“Nothing is going to fit right until either we adjust clothes to fit you or purchase ones already in your size,” Kustaa said. He adjusted the shirt as best he could by pinning it up and wrapping rope around Zuko’s waist to act as a belt. “Now that you’re dressed, we need to go see the chief.” Zuko’s eyes went wide in horror.

“No! I’m not going outside like this.”

“Everyone knows what’s happened to you,” Kustaa said, getting to his feet. He took Zuko’s hand. It was small and warm. “Most of them saw you already, and the rest were informed by either the chief or Bato.”

“…Fine,” Zuko grumbled. Kustaa led him out onto the deck. The moment eyes landed on him, Zuko dropped Kustaa’s hand to hide behind his legs.

“Wow, you’re barely older than the babes we left at the South Pole,” Panuk remarked. Zuko didn’t move or speak.

“I think he’s adorable,” Toklo said firmly, marching over. He crouched down to Zuko’s eye-height. “I always wanted a baby brother.”

“I’m not a baby,” Zuko snapped. At his high-pitched, youthful voice, Toklo beamed. “I’m sixteen.”

“Four,” Kustaa corrected. Zuko scowled.

“Either way, that’s not a baby.”

“Aw, no need to pout,” Toklo cooed. Zuko’s scowl deepened. “It’ll be fun having a little kid on board.”

“Will it?” rumbled Aake. “We only let men join the crew for a reason.” Zuko let out a small squeak as Toklo lifted him up and held him out for Aake to see.

“Try saying ‘no’ to this face,” Toklo said. Aake’s deadpan expression didn’t change.

“No.”

“Were you saying ‘no’ to Zuko or ‘no’ to saying ‘no’ to him?” Toklo asked. Aake shrugged and continued to sharpen his spear. Zuko squirmed in Toklo’s hold.

“Let me go!” he snarled. He broke loose, falling to the deck with a soft thump. Kustaa waited for the tears that would come from a toddler being dropped. But Zuko didn’t cry. His eyes were glistening in a way that suggested he was holding back tears, but he remained otherwise stoic. Kustaa filed this observation away for now. He walked over to Zuko and pulled him up.

“The chief needs to talk to you, remember?” he said. Zuko nodded silently, allowing Kustaa to lead him to Hakoda’s cabin.

-----

The moment they set foot inside the cabin, Kustaa could tell Hakoda was going to struggle with not seeing Sokka every time he looked at Zuko. At least Bato was there to help mediate things.

“Take a seat,” Hakoda said. Zuko toddled over to the chair he normally sat in. After a moment, he climbed onto the seat with obvious difficulty. Bato stifled a laugh. “Zuko, we’re not sure why the spirits have done this to you.”

“Probably because they hate me,” Zuko muttered, crossing his arms.

“Well, no matter why you’ve been turned into a toddler, the fact of the matter is that it has happened to you. Generally, we don’t allow children your age to be on our ships.” Zuko paled and opened his mouth to make his case. Hakoda held up a hand. “Given your…extenuating circumstances, we won’t be dropping you off at the next port or something like that. Who knows, maybe you’ll wake up tomorrow sixteen again. Until we have a better understanding of your condition, including how long it might last, you’ll be staying on the Akhlut. Do you understand?”

“Yes,” Zuko said with a nod, visibly relieved.

“Good. Now, just because you’ll still be on board, don’t expect things to stay the same for you. You won’t be required to do any chores on the ship. If you want to help, you can, but the crew has been instructed to stop you from overexerting yourself or doing something that might hurt you at your current age.” Zuko’s eyes boggled. “Additionally, you’ll be sleeping in the infirmary with Kustaa for the foreseeable future. It will be more comfortable for you.”

“Understood,” Zuko mumbled.

“Another change is that you will be expected to do what a child your age must in order to remain healthy,” Hakoda said. Zuko tilted his head curiously. “In particular, you will have to take naps.”

“What?!” Zuko shrieked.

“We can’t have a cranky, overtired firebender on our wooden ship,” Bato said. Zuko crossed his arms, scowling.

“Those are the major changes. We will adjust things as we see fit,” Hakoda said.

“Okay.” Zuko fidgeted in his seat, an abrupt reminder to the men in the room of how hyperactive toddlers were. “Um, about my clothes…”

“Go see Panuk and Toklo. They offered to try to cobble together something for you until we can make port,” Hakoda said. Zuko ducked his head.

“Thank you.” He slipped off his chair and left the cabin, his head held high in an attempt to maintain any dignity. Once the door closed, Kustaa looked at Hakoda and Bato.

“He’s not going to act like a toddler if he can avoid it,” Kustaa said. “He’s almost certainly going to resist the reduced workload and naps.” Hakoda nodded.

“I agree,” he said solemnly.

“This won’t end well,” Bato said, shaking his head. “There’s a reason we wouldn’t normally have someone his age on board.” There was a loud ruckus from the deck; clattering, heavy footsteps, and Toklo’s voice.

“Come on, Zuko, it’ll look so cute!”

“That,” Bato said, “is the reason.”

-----

Hakoda begrudgingly agreed with Toklo’s assessment. Zuko was cuter than he had any right looking, walking around the ship with a blanket draped over his shoulders like a cape. According to Toklo, Zuko had begun shivering while he and Panuk were working on finding something for the new toddler to wear. Toddlers tended to get cold easier, and Hakoda supposed that being a firebender might make Zuko more vulnerable to cold as is.

“Are you hungry yet, little prince?” Panuk asked. Zuko looked up from his fumbling attempts at making a net.

“Don’t call me that,” he snarled. Panuk patted Zuko’s bald head.

“All right. You hungry yet, Zuko?” he asked. Zuko’s stomach rumbled loudly. “I’ll take that as a yes.” Panuk got up. “Come on. Let’s fill you up with sea prunes.” Zuko got to his feet and eagerly followed Panuk. Hakoda watched Zuko toddle across the deck and to the kitchen.

“You’re getting soft, Chief, I can tell,” Aake, standing nearby, said quietly. Hakoda looked at him. Aake sighed. “But I’m getting soft, too. We left when Sitka was about that age.” A weary and wistful expression settled on Aake’s face. “I miss my son.”

“I miss mine as well,” Hakoda said quietly. Suddenly, Zuko burst onto the deck, his arms full of sea prunes, running from Panuk.

“Hey! You don’t get all of them!” Panuk protested, coming onto the deck as well. Zuko merely sped up. Hakoda and Aake’s eyes widened as they realized the former Fire Nation Prince was giggling as Panuk chased him. Zuko’s lighthearted, childish peals of laughter filled the air. He rushed belowdeck, his blanket still wrapped around his shoulders. Panuk followed. A silence fell. After a moment, Tuluk, who was swabbing the deck, spoke.

“Well, that was adorable.”

-----

Hakoda expected Zuko to hide belowdeck, embarrassed by behaving like a toddler. But Zuko returned to the deck after a while, seemingly unaware of how childish he had acted. He walked up to various crewmen in an attempt to do some of his old chores. Each time, he was turned away. His regular scowl settled on his face, chubby with baby fat.

“Can’t do anything,” Zuko muttered as he stalked around the deck, his blanket trailing behind him. He finally sat down next to the mast, pouting.

“It’s good that you can’t do anything,” Hakoda said, walking over. Zuko looked up. “Leaving a task in the middle of doing it doesn’t usually produce good results.”

“Why would I not complete a task?” Zuko asked. He crossed his arms. “I’m not really a child, I can focus.”

“You’d need to take a break for your nap,” Hakoda informed him. Zuko’s eyes widened. “I saw you yawning just now. You’re tired.”

“No, I’m not!” Zuko said, jumping to his feet. He shed his blanket cape. “I won’t nap.”

“You agreed to take naps.”

“Only if I needed them. I don’t. I’m not tired.” Zuko’s argument sounded eerily like those Sokka made as a child.

“There’s nothing for you to do anyways,” Hakoda pointed out. He reached for Zuko’s hand. Zuko darted away before he could be grabbed. Unfortunately for his millionth escape attempt, Aake was nearby. Aake picked Zuko up as he ran past.

“Let me go!” Zuko said, twisting in Aake’s grip. “Let me go!” A breath of flame escaped from his mouth. He suddenly stilled. Aake handed him over to Hakoda. Zuko didn’t make a peep as Hakoda carried him across the deck and into the infirmary. Kustaa looked up from the book he was reading.

“Is it time for my nephew’s nap?” he asked. Hakoda nodded and set Zuko down.

“Sleep,” he said firmly to Zuko. “That’s an order.” Zuko nodded, visibly cowed.

“Yes, chief,” he mumbled. Hakoda turned to leave. “Sir, I apologize for firebending earlier,” Zuko said suddenly. Hakoda looked over his shoulder at the toddler.

“You firebending on accident wouldn’t have anything to do with agreeing to nap, would it?” he asked.

“Uncle says that sleep works in concert with meditation to control your inner fire. Children who are too young to know how to meditate only avoid burning down their house by taking…naps.” Zuko scowled slightly. “That’s the excuse he gives for being so lazy.” Kustaa chuckled softly.

“Judging by what happened on deck, your uncle might be right,” Hakoda said, feigning a casual tone. Zuko nodded. “Sleep well, Zuko.”

Hakoda poked his head into the infirmary after he had checked on the rest of the crewmen. Some of the crew felt Zuko’s current size was an improvement. Hakoda could see where they were coming from. Zuko was yet again buried in a pile of furs, his minute arms wrapped around Scuttles.

“He went down almost right after you left, chief,” Kustaa said quietly. “I didn’t even need to make him any tea.”

“Hopefully he won’t argue against naps in the future.” Hakoda continued to watch Zuko sleep. The toddler let out a soft snore. “It’s foolish to expect that he’ll ask for a nap, though.” Kustaa nodded.

“I would agree with that.” Zuko rolled over in his sleep with another snore.

“Let me know if anything happens,” Hakoda said.

“Of course,” Kustaa said. He picked up another book, opened it, and began to read. Hakoda left the infirmary, closing the door behind him as softly as he could.

#Spirit Touched #ATLA #Zuko #Hakoda #Bato #muffinlance #agent-jaselin #(idk how to tag the various OCs eek)#I wrote quite a bit more but that stuff will probably wait until more chapters of Salvage are posted #just to keep things as in line with the fic as possible y'know #(I haven't been this nervous about posting a fic in a while hhhhhhhhhhh)#my writing #my stuff #fanfiction #speecher speaks

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mcu-fan-fics-blog · 3 years

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The Helping Hand

Summary: Y/N Krast Illegitimate Daughter of Tony Stark. Product of an unwanted teen pregnancy. What would Howard Stark be capable of doing to assure his sons future? What will happen when Tony meets our Beautiful, young, genius, rich philanthropist.

Word Count: 2000 approx

A/n: I will try to finish part 2 during the week maybe Wednesday or Thursday. I did change what happens in the movie but it will call make sense I promise. See you soon!

Tw: Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Drug use, Drug addiction, Teen Pregnancy. (If there are any I missed please tell me.)

Ch.8

Chapter 9: Civil War Pt.1

Ch.10

Secretary Ross what a bitch. I mean you save the world you'd expect a thanks maybe a parade or something, but no. Instead they ask you to legally give up your rights, your anonymity basically all you value. "We can't seriously consider signing this." Steve spat out. "You're being Hyper nonverbal." Nat points tony out. "That's because he's already decided." Steve points out calmly. "I can't sign… I won't sign the accords." You mutter out quietly. "I'm not even an official part of the 'team'. I don't even have a hero name." Pietro chuckles giving you an approving nod.

Nat brings you and Pietro back to reality. "You were still there." She points out matter of factly. "Either way that does not change that we have made some very public mistakes." She continues. "We need to be put in check." Tony states. "If we don't do it now they will do it to us later and they won't be asking nicely." He says. "I agree it's better to keep one hand on the wheel, than letting go completely." You're honestly not listening at this point anymore. You jump back in after Visions statistics. "My friends are dead because of you." You point out.

"You blame Wanda for an accident. When I saw your effect on Sokovia way before you blew it up." You mention spitefully. "If you want to sign because you feel guilty go ahead. I'm not being forced into this..." Tony sighs hurt by your comments' brutal honesty. "I'm just trying to protect Wanda." He says looking at you. "Too little too late… where were you when she was in Lagos." This is when Wanda steps in. "Just calm down okay… Just- lets just hear him out." She says looking at you. "Either we have her here with her brother or they become government property." He continues. "You can't just not sign… think about everything you'll lose." Steve jumps in again. "If we sign, we lose our chance to choose. We work under our own authority now, but people have agendas and you know that better than anyone." Steve points out.

Tony and Steve go at it for a minute when he abruptly leaves. Soon you find out why… Peggy passed. You and Nat flew out to be with him for a moment. After which he told you he was not signing the accords. "Wish you the best Captain Rogers." Is what you said. You hesitated but pulled him into a hug. "If you ever need anything talk to me… I'll do my best to help you out." You tell him and he hugs you back. Nat convinced you to fly to Vienna with her and sign the accords there. So you did and regretted it not long after you arrived. It was a complete bore fest. You let Nat do her own thing and you just walked around like a lost puppy until something called your attention. You rush back to her immediately. "Nat, something's wrong, something is very wrong." You repeat then you look out the window confirming your theory. "EVERYBODY GET DOWN" you yell as you leap on Natasha. She's about to reprimand you for causing a scene when the whole building shakes.

It was a blur and everything hurts. You stand up and all you can hear is ringing and a faint voice. As you stand you hear your name faintly Natasha is calling you but there's something else. Your head begins to throb. The voice it's clear now. It's repeating words. "Zhelanie, rzhavyy, Semndtsat', Rassvet, Pech', Devgat', Dobroserdechnyy, Vozvrashcheniye na rodinu, Odin', Gruzovoy Vagon." You grab your head to try and steady yourself. But the voice gets louder and then you recognize it. "Don't believe what you see… dig deeper Y/n. It wasn't him." Then you're pulled out of your daze by Nat standing before you. "Y/n are you okay?" She asks worried. You only nod turning your head and noticing that somehow you made your way outside. "I umm- I need you to call tony and tell him it happened again." You say calmly she nods and takes off to make the call. As she did that you called Steve. "Yes, Steve I'm fine we're fine… but you need to listen to me."

He was scared and the news spread like wildfire. "It wasn't him… Steve it wasn't him." He's quiet. "How do you know?" You sigh. "I just do Steve okay. I believe in you alright. But you can't look for him. If you find him the rest will find him. Keep your distance a week two tops just listen to me please." You plead with him he eventually sighs. "I'm trusting you Y/n" you sigh in relief. You hang up when Nat begins to walk back to you. "Tony is sending a Plane." She mentions looking around them fixing her sight on you. "How did you know something was going to happen?" Her voice nearly a whisper. You shake your head. "Y/n you told me something was wrong very wrong at least 30 seconds before the bombs went off."

"I-i don't know Nat something felt wrong… off then I looked out the window." You say trying to piece together your thoughts. "Lets go… let me drop you off at the airport." She says helping you up. The drive was quiet and uncomfortable. She wasn't sure she believed you, she saw that you called someone. Her walls were up and your answers were not helping that. She helped you board the plane and said her goodbyes and walked out. The ride was quiet what you wanted. But those words kept circling your mind. You couldn't have heard them more than three times but they were burnt into your mind. Vision and then twins were waiting for you when you landed. "Mr. Stark and Dr. Banner will not get here in a couple of days." You nod taking your time getting off.

"Are you okay?" Pietro asks when you trip down the last step. You shake your head. "I'm just tired, plus it's not everyday that you live through an explosion." You chuckle. "I just need some rest." You finish. Your sleep was not as peaceful as you'd like. Your head kept going back to that state of limbo the same words repeating over and over again. In the morning you're feeling well enough and make your way down to the kitchen. You weren't surprised when you found the Maximoff twins already up and going. "Good morning" you say as you walk up to them noticing Vision floating in a corner. "Good morning do you feel better?" Wanda asks as she flips a pancake. You nod watching Pietro chop vegetables extremely fast. Wanda clears her throat catching your attention. "Your thoughts were very loud last night…"

"Oh my Wanda I am so sorry if I kept you up." You begin apologizing but she cuts you short. "It's fine I only brought it up because I can hear them… they are there, but I can read them?" She says questioning whether or not you understood. You nod. "Did it happen again?" She asks, worry filling her eyes. "I-i don't know how to explain it. Yesterday I felt something was off. I heard a voice after the explosion." You mention trying to wrap your head around the situation. "It was repeating these words. I can't stop thinking about them." You finish off. She gives you a confused look. "Bruce said it's kinda like the green guy… It keeps me alive."

"Is that why I can't read you anymore?" She blurts out. "I don't know probably." You shrug. "Nat, she doesn't believe me… I saw it in her eyes." You mention quietly. Pietro rushes over to you and puts his arm around you, messing with your hair. "Well we believe you, isn't that right?" He looks at Wanda and she nods. He has to throw a piece of fruit at Vision. "Yes, I think there is something to your condition." He mentions a smile growing on his face… Or what you think he thinks is a smile. It causes everyone to break out into laughter. After that you and the twins have a nice couple of days hanging out and living in some type of normalcy. You would watch the Dik Van Dyke show and Bewitched per Wanda's request and then one night something was off again. "Wanda… something's off. It's different." Is the last thing you manage to say before Vision rushes over to your side. This time the threat was internal… your heart.

"Y/n to my understanding your heart is going into cardiac arrest. Stop fighting your mind, it will protect you." He mentions. You clutch your chest and let your mind loose. "Mr. Stark and Dr. Banner have been informed and will be here soo…'' is all your hear before you black out. You're in and put at one point you think you see Bruce but you're not sure. Then you're back in that white tundra and she's there waiting for you with a warm smile on her face. "Why do we keep meeting like this?" You ask as you run towards her. "It's you…" Is all she says hugging you. "Yes, who else would it be." You say playfully. She chuckles but she shakes her head. "It's you we meet on your terms. You only let me in when your guard is down." She steps back. "Are your okay?" She asks cautiously. "I really hope so." You say honestly taking a seat on the floor. "That's not what I meant… I-i um I had to give you a push in Vienna." She sits next to you. "That was you! Of course that makes sense. What do they mean." She smiles. "You'll figure it out… I know you will." She says again and you lay your head on her lap. She runs her fingers through your hair humming. "How long can I stay here with you like this?" You ask with your eyes closed. "As long as your want monkey."

"Where is she, is she okay? What the hell happened?" Tony burst into the compound the anger masking how scared he was. "Dr. Cho is in there right now and she's stable. She's almost done. Dr. Banner is assisting" Vision answers Tony calms down slightly turning to the twins. "What the hell happened?" They both shrug and Pietro speaks up. "You should ask her." He says his head nodding towards Nat. Tony makes a double take when Steve and Sam walk out behind her. Natasha walks up to them "What happened?" Tony only signs "That seems to be the Billion Dollar question." Wanda jumps back in. "She said something was off… something happened in Vienna." Now Pietro get defensive and jumps in to back his sister. "She said you didn't believe her." Tony turns to Nat. "Did she tell you this?"

"What was I supposed to believe Tony… she knew a building was going to explode before it did." Tony is now pacing. "She told you something was wrong… MY DAUGHTER told you something was wrong, that something was wrong with her. And you didn't think to tell me!" Natasha is left speechless and so is everyone else. That's when Dr. Cho walks back into the waiting room. "The surgery was a success and we replaced the damaged heart. She should wake up in a couple of hours depending as their medications wear off." She says not noticing the tension. Tony sighs in relief and Dr. Cho walks off. Tony points at Natasha. "You will stay away from her agent Romanoff." With that he walks off.

It had been more than a few hours. It had been days and you hadn't woken up. "What is happening to her?" Tony hadn't left your side. Everyone had stopped by everyday their hopes diminished. Bruce calls him over and makes him take a seat. "Tony we have to wake her up soon!" He nods. "Of course we do!" He says looking at Bruce shake his head. "Her medical directives legally bind us to remove all life sustaining measures after two weeks."

#avengers #marvel #natasha romanoff #natasha x y/n #pietro maximoff #tony stark #wanda x reader #fanfic #reader x avengers #wanda maximoff #bucky barnes #civil war #captain america #chapter 9 #vision #tony x pepper #tony stank #howard stark #helmut zemo

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the-modernmary · 3 years

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my best habit || aaron hotchner x reader (ch. 8)

Chapter summary: When Aaron gets stuck at work late and Jess has to go help out her dad, Aaron has nobody else to turn to but you to watch Jack. The only problem? Up until now, Aaron has been keeping his home life completely separate from you, and you have no clue how this will effect your already precarious relationship with Aaron.

Warnings: N/A

A/N: This was not part of the original plan at all for this story, but I couldn’t get it out of my head.

masterlist || read on ao3

In between What I find is pleasing and I'm feeling fine Love is so confusing, there's no peace of mind If I fear I'm losing you it's just no good You teasing like you do - Blondie, “Heart of Glass”

~~~~~~~

You were on your couch doing homework when you got the call from Aaron, and you frowned in confusion when you saw his name flash across your cell phone screen. Aaron never called you while he was working, and you especially didn’t expect a call from him today. He was doing a custodial interview with an inmate sentenced to death somewhere in Virginia, and you figured prison didn’t have the greatest cell service.

“Hey there, jailbird,” you greeted. “Are you inviting me to the dance?”

“Very cute, Elvis,” Aaron joked, but it was half hearted. You could hear the exhaustion in his voice. “I need to ask you for a favor, and I want you to know that I wouldn’t be asking you if I had any other options.”

“Mhm, I love being the last choice,” you mused sarcastically. “You really know how to make a girl feel special, Aaron.”

Aaron elected to ignore your last comment. “The prison just went on lockdown, so I’m going to be stuck here for at least a few more hours,” he explained, and there was an unnatural nervousness to his voice. “And Jessica has to go deal with an emergency with her father.”

You frowned to yourself, unsure of where Aaron was going with his explanation, and even more unsure of who this Jessica person was. A pang of jealousy shot through you, but you quickly bottled that feeling.

Aaron took a moment to compose himself before continuing. “Would you be willing to watch Jack for a few hours? I know it’s not ideal, but it would just be for a little while until either I get out of here or somebody else from the BAU gets off of work. I would even be willing to compensate you for your time.”

Oh.

OH.

Silence crackled through the phone as you took in his request, and you could practically feel Aaron’s nervousness. It shouldn’t have been as big of a deal as it was. It had been two months since you’ve been with Aaron, you slept over at his house enough, and you worked in the same building as him. It was pretty inevitable that of course you were going to meet Jack at some point, but you always figured it would be with Aaron there to mediate. You had pictured that it would probably be accidental, maybe Jack would wake up early and would catch you sneaking out of Aaron’s house. Or you would be invited to one of Rossi’s famous dinners and the kids would be there and then there would be no questions asked. You definitely didn’t expect to babysit.

“Yeah, of course, I can watch him,” you said finally, and you heard Aaron let out a sigh of relief. “And you don’t have to pay me… or worry about finding a replacement. He can hang out with me for as long as you need.”

“Thank you,” Aaron told you, still sounding completely drained. “I will send your address to Jessica, and she will drop Jack off at your place in about half an hour. I really owe you, Y/N. I have to go talk to the warden now, but please call me if you need anything, okay? Bye.” Before you could even answer, Aaron hung up.

You took a deep breath as dread settled in the pit of your stomach. How hard would babysitting be, really? You’ve babysat before - Aly had a little brother who basically became your little brother. However, a weird part of you was nervous that Jack wouldn’t like you, which was ridiculous. It didn’t matter whether or not Jack liked you.

Right?

Deciding that you couldn’t just sit there and panic, you chose to use the time to tidy up your apartment, just to make it extra presentable. The organized mess that was your homework space was quickly arranged so that all of your notebooks and papers were in a neat pile. You took down the half empty tequila bottle from forever ago that was sitting on the top of your fridge and shoved it into a cabinet somewhere. The throw blanket that you had been wrapped up in was refolded and placed on the arm of your couch. You wanted to at least give the illusion that you were prepared to babysit Aaron’s son, and not completely freaking out inside.

Right on schedule, knocking came from your door, and you rushed to open it. You were greeted by a blonde woman, probably a few years younger than Aaron, who you assumed to be Jessica. Next to her was the elusive Jack, with his blonde hair and missing front tooth. You had seen a few photos of Jack in passing, hanging up around Aaron’s house and whatnot, but you never got a good look at the photos.

“Y/N?” Jessica asked cautiously, and you nodded slowly. “Hi, I’m Jessica, Jack’s aunt.”

Jack’s aunt. A million emotions hit you at once. Oh god, she was Haley’s sister. Your stomach started to feel queasy, and it took you a second to realize that it was guilt, although you weren’t quite sure what you felt guilty about.

Logically, you knew Aaron had a life outside of you. Hell, you had slowly become part of that outside life now that you were friends with his coworkers, but you really tried to avoid thinking about Aaron’s home life. When he wasn’t with you, it was out of sight, out of mind. He was his own individual entity.

Now you were face-to-face with just how insignificant you were in the grand scheme of Aaron’s life. The fact was that you were probably no more than a side storyline in his life, a character created just for Aaron’s own development. He had a life and a family that you barely knew about. There was evidence of his home life everywhere - the bins of toys at his house, drawings on his fridge, family photos in matching frames in the hallway, even a small jewelry box on his dresser that looked like it had been collecting dust for a few years - but you had gotten good at averting your eyes.

“Hi, yes, that’s me,” you replied, shaking Jessica’s hand. Then you bent down so you were closer to Jack’s height. “Hey dude, I’m Y/N,” you introduced, giving him a small wave.

Jessica took the backpack she was carrying and helped Jack slip it onto his shoulders. “Thank you again for doing this on such short notice. Aaron should have sent over my phone number if you need anything, but Jack’s a good kid. He just has some homework that he needs to get done,” she explained.

“It’s no problem,” you told her, giving her your best reassuring smile. “He’s in good hands here.”

Jessica smiled gratefully at you before kneeling down to say goodbye to Jack. You stood in the doorway awkwardly as you watched the interaction curiously. It was as normal as it could get, Jessica telling Jack to behave and that she loves him, but it also fascinated you, like you were watching a movie and all of the characters had popped out of the screen.

Jack gave his aunt a hug before she left, and the two of you stepped into your apartment. That same nervousness came back in full force. What kind of games did he like to play? You didn’t have any toys for him. What if you couldn’t help him with his homework? Do kids his age learn fractions yet, because you did not remember fractions. What if-

“Woah!” came Jack’s voice, breaking you out of your spiraling. “Can I please sit on the bean bag chair?”

Well, Jack certainly wasn’t nervous, which offered you more relief than you thought it would. “Yeah, of course, you can. It’s my favorite place to do my homework.”

Jack flopped onto the bean bag chair, his tiny frame almost completely consumed by it. You could see the confusion growing on Jack’s face. “You have to do homework?” Jack asked.

“Yup,” you told him. “And I know you do, too, so we can do homework together.”

Jack jutted out his bottom lip in a pout. “Will I have to still do homework when I’m old?”

At that, you let out a genuine laugh, even if you were a little shocked. The kid had personality, you had to admit. “I’m not that old,” you halfheartedly protested, “And maybe. It depends on what you want to be when you grow up.”

“I want to be a superhero,” Jack said matter-of-factly. “Like Spiderman.”

You nodded, the movement playfully exaggerated. “Oh, well Spiderman is really smart. I’m sure he does a lot of homework, so you better get to work. Let me know if you need any help, okay?” You chuckled again at Jack’s increased pout, obviously disappointed in the fact that even superheroes had to focus on school.

Jack reached into his backpack and pulled out a pencil and a brightly colored folder with papers sticking out of it every which way. He started on his worksheets, his eyebrows scrunched in concentration, and it hit you just how much he looked like Aaron. The blonde hair threw you off, but you had seen that exact look on Aaron’s face many times, eyebrows together and lips pursed ever so slightly. Like father, like son. You had to resist the urge to audibly coo at the sight. You were only human, after all.

You tore your eyes away from the boy and glanced over at your laptop, which was sitting open on your coffee table, the cursor blinking back at you teasingly, reminding you that you also had to get to work. You had essays to write and practice contracts to draft up. The two of you did your work in comfortable silence for a while, Jack occasionally asking you to help him read the instructions of his worksheet.

“Done!” Jack exclaimed proudly after a while, holding his packet of papers high in the air.

Just in time, too, because if you had to do any more criminal tax litigation work, you were going to pull out your hair from boredom. There was only so much corporate fraud you could read about in one sitting.

“With all of your homework?” you clarified, and he nodded so fast that he looked like a full-on bobblehead. “Good job, dude!”

“Did you finish your homework so that we can play?” he asked you.

“Yup, I’m all done,” you lied. Your paper wasn’t due for another week, anyway. “So what do you want to play?”

Jack tapped his finger on his chin as he thought about it. You were aware that you didn’t have much in the way of kid’s toys, but you had stuff to color or paint or play board games, and you were confident enough in your imagination to come up with a game if it came down to that. Jack looked around and suddenly his eyes got wide and he pointed to your Switch.

“Do you have Mario Kart?” he asked hopefully. “Can we play that?”

“That sounds like fun, let’s do that,” you told him, making your way to set up the console. “I’ll even let you be player one.”

Jack was practically bouncing up and down in his seat now. “I’m really good at this game. I can even beat my uncle Dave!”

You laughed as the two of you picked your characters. Jack chose Yoshi, a solid choice, and you went with Toad. “You can beat your Uncle Dave? Wow, that’s impressive. I have to warn you, though, I’m also very good at this game. Do you think you can beat me?” you teased.

“Definitely,” Jack challenged, and the game began.

The two of you played for a little while, and Jack’s mind was blown when you told him about the shortcuts on each track. After about three cups and you telling him where every shortcut you knew was, the 7-year-old was starting to get antsy just sitting, so you decided to switch gears.

You brought out some leftover paints and canvases you had from a paint night with your friends, and you and Jack laid on the floor and did some painting, although you were not prepared for how messy it would get. Somehow, Jack ended up with his fingertips covered in blue paint, and you had a streak of green on your cheek from where you mindlessly brushed hair from out of your face. As you placed the artwork to the side to dry, Jack had already decided on the next game - the floor is lava.

Before you even realized it, three hours had passed and it was time to make dinner. Jack chose pizza, which you luckily already had in your freezer. The game was still going, but you and Jack agreed that the kitchen was the only safe place without lava, considering there were too many dangerous things in that vicinity.

Babysitting Jack was easier than you expected, and much more fun. Even in his more playful moments, Aaron was always a little bit guarded and on edge, so you had a hard time imagining what his child would be like. A weird part of you almost imagined a mini adult in a child-sized suit and a briefcase full of fruit snacks and crackers, as ridiculous as it sounded. But Jack was just like any other 7-year-old - goofy, a little loud, and excited about the world.

You wondered if Aaron was like that as a kid, or if that part of Jack’s personality came from his mom. Maybe Jack was a mini version of his mom. Now that you had gotten the tiniest taste of Aaron’s home life, you found yourself craving to know more, to see Aaron in dad-mode.

Selfishly, you also wanted Aaron to watch you interact with Jack, just to see his reaction. It was a gamble and you realized it. Best case scenario, Aaron would be able to breathe a little bit easier. There wouldn’t be that half second of awkward silence between the two of you every time he mentioned Jack’s name. That stupid guilt you felt so often would dissipate because, hey, you met Jack and now that was out of the way.

On the other hand, everything could come crashing down. Aaron could walk in, see you with Jack, and immediately regret his decision and regret you. It would solidify in both of your minds that you were no more than somebody he could call and fuck when he felt himself on the verge of breaking down. Any self-imposed importance you had placed on yourself in Aaron’s life, no matter how small it was (and it was pretty small), would be a lie. He had a shorter temper now than before, and maybe this would be the exact thing that would set him off.

You didn’t want that, of course, but you really did want to know what would happen, to see where you stood with him. Call it morbid curiosity.

You were pulling the pizza out of the oven when you heard the knock on the door. “Coming!” you called.

“Don’t touch the lava!” Jack reminded you from his spot on the coffee table, just as you were about to leave the kitchen. Your method of movement to and from the kitchen was the rolling chair from your desk and a broom so that you could push yourself where you needed to go, which you had to justify to Jack as being a lava boat.

You “rowed” yourself over the door and looked in the peephole. Aaron was on the other side, nervously rubbing his thumb over the rest of his fingers. It took some work, but you were able to open the door without falling off the chair.

“Hey, I know you,” you greeted Aaron, but your smile fell when you took in his appearance. His whole body was tensed up, like a rubberband about to snap. He didn’t have his tie or blazer on, and the cuffs of his shirt were undone.

“Dad!” Jack shouted, waving excitedly.

“Hi, buddy.” Aaron smiled, but it didn’t quite reach his eyes. He was scanning the room, studying the scene in front of him. Aaron’s expression slowly shifted to confusion as Jack bounded across your furniture to get closer to his dad. “Jack, what are you doing on the table?” Aaron’s eyes shifted to where you were, noticing for the first time that you were kneeling on a rolling chair, holding onto the broom like a trident. “And why do you two have paint on you?”

“The floor is lava,” you explained nonchalantly.

“And you’re going to get burned!” Jack pointed out.

You chuckled and swiveled your chair so that you could get a better look at Jack. “How about we give your dad a minute to find a spot, okay dude?” You turned back to Aaron, lowering your voice. “The kitchen is a safe zone, if you don’t want to have to crawl around on furniture.”

Aaron frowned, and you could see the wheels turning in his brain. “No, I should take Jack home anyways,” he finally said. “You’ve helped enough today and I don’t want to impose.”

“You’re not imposing,” you insisted. “Besides, we just made a pizza that I’m not going to be able to eat by myself. Come in, have dinner. You look like you need it.”

He really did. You were certain that he hadn’t eaten anything the entire time he was at the jail. He looked exhausted, too, and it was taking every bit of his energy to keep his usual stoic and stony composure.

Aaron wanted to argue, but instead, let out a resigned sigh. “Thank you. You, uh, said that the kitchen was a safe zone?”

“Mhm, and you might want to hurry because Jack is in it to win. Already tried to sabotage my chair boat.”

While Aaron’s face remained emotionless, his gaze softened as he stepped into your apartment. “Jack, did you have fun with Y/N?” he asked, making his way to the kitchen.

Jack hopped from the coffee table to the couch and onto a trail of pillows he had made. “Yeah! She taught me how to cheat in Mario Kart!”

You rolled your way back to the kitchen, chuckling sheepishly. “Shortcuts aren’t cheating, it’s playing smart,” you defended.

Jack just giggled and continued to animatedly tell Aaron about his day at school as you each started to dig into dinner. Well, Jack and you dug into the pizza, while Aaron took all off two bites and pushed his plate to the side. You had originally thought that it was the interview that caused Aaron’s tenseness, but you realized with a start that Aaron was completely focused on you. He was watching you curiously, like you had subtly changed your appearance and he couldn’t quite put his finger on what was different.

He was just intrigued by your interaction with Jack as you had been with Jack and Jessica’s interactions. You had thought that he was going to make a snap judgment and decide if he was ever going to want to see you again the second he saw you with Jack, but he was taking his time. He was profiling you.

“Hey Jack,” you interjected once he finished eating. “Your dad and I are going to do dishes, but I need you to do me a big favor. I can’t win Bowser’s Castle no matter how hard I try. Do you think you could do that race for me while we clean up?”

Aaron looked at you in confusion, but you kept your eyes on Jack, who was all too happy to have an excuse to get out of cleaning and go back to playing video games. He practically bounced back into the living room, leaving you and Aaron alone.

“Do you want something to drink?” you offered. Aaron was watching your every movement, studying you carefully. “I have tea, coffee… Irish coffee, if it’s that kind of night.” You added the last part as an afterthought, only partially joking.

The corner of Aaron’s mouth twitched upwards so subtly that if you weren’t looking for it, you wouldn’t have even noticed. “No thank you,” he answered formally.

You mindlessly traced circles on the tabletop with your finger, keeping your eyes downcast. You knew you couldn’t just outright ask what was on his mind, he’d never answer truthfully. “Do I want to know what that creep did to be put on death row?” you asked, keeping your voice as indifferent as possible..

Aaron shook his head. “I wouldn’t tell you even if you did,” he admitted and the two of you fell into silence again. It was the answer you had pretty much come to expect from him.

Despite the fact that, as a lawyer, you’d have to hear about all these awful things and see the evidence, Aaron tried to shield you from his work. He didn’t talk about cases, didn’t glamorize the work he did the way some younger agents would. In all the time you’ve known him, you could count the number of criminals you knew he took down on your fingers, and some of those were only because you learned about them in class.

That was fine. You didn’t want Aaron to have to bring that to your bed, not when you were supposed to be his distraction from all that mess. And what a fun distraction you were.

Aaron looked at his watch, effectively ending the conversation. “We should go, it’s getting late. Thank you for watching Jack. And for dinner.”

You paused, debating your next move. “It’s no problem,” you said sincerely. “And if you need anything else from me… I’ll be awake for a while.” You let your offer hang in the air for a few moments, watching as Aaron seemed to be weighing options in his head, you just didn’t know what those options were.

You were just about to rescind your offer when he opened his mouth to speak. “Are you sure you don’t want any compensation?”

You waved off his offer. “I’m positive.”

Aaron shoved his hands in the pockets of his slacks. “Then let me buy you dinner sometime this week. It’s the least I can do.”

You paused, trying to keep your expression as neutral as possible. Aaron had never made an offer like this before, never took steps towards anything that could push this into something even remotely considered a relationship. It was easy to explain the constant sex. You could even justify the lingering morning-afters or the nights spent hunched over your textbooks while Aaron wordlessly refilled your coffee cup without you having to even ask by claiming that it all happened organically. It’s not like the two of you planned to stay up and debate the lost history of the term “beyond a reasonable doubt”. It just sort of happened, and who were you to turn down free coffee?

Anything more would complicate the carefully curated system, and neither of you had the time or energy for complicated.

Despite every logical bone in your body screaming at you to walk away and leave while you were ahead, you couldn’t help the soft “Yeah, I’d really like that,” that slipped past your lips.

You could have sworn Aaron smiled at your answer, but he didn’t say anything more.

The two of you walked back to your living room in silence. “Alright buddy,” Aaron called, ruffling Jack’s hair. “It’s time for us to head home. Say thank you to Y/N.”

Jack pouted as he exited the game. “Can Y/N watch me again soon? Please? It was fun!”

“We’ll have to see, she might be busy,” Aaron mused, looking at you so that he could gauge your reaction. It was enough of an answer to not crush Jack’s hopes, but vague enough that it gave you room to deny the offer. He was letting you choose how much you wanted to be around Jack, if you wanted to be around him at all.

You grinned down at Jack and held out your hand for a high five, which he took as an invitation to try and slap your hand as hard as he could. How could you say no to him? “Of course I can watch you again. I’ll even have Legos next time.”

For the first time that night, Aaron gave you a real smile, one that you could actually see. It was small, but it was genuine. “Thank you again. Goodnight, Y/N,” he told you and Jack echoed the sentiment, waving at you as they walked out the door.

#aaron hotchner #aaron hotchner fanfiction #criminal minds #criminal minds fanfiction #aaron hotchner x reader #aaron hotchner x y/n #jack hotchner #my writing #my best habit

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duchesschameleon · 3 years

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what if - chapter 8

pairing: Aaron Hotchner x GN!Reader words: 1929 a/n: Carolyn is here! this is the second to last chapter and we get some happiness and some angst. I’m super, super excited to share this with everyone!! the last chapter still needs some editing, it’ll get posted probably next week! as always, thank you to @qvid-pro-qvo for being the best beta

warnings: angst, some discussions of death

what if masterlist

You watch Dave’s face as for the first time in nearly 50 years, he lays eyes on Carolyn Bartolini. His jaw drops in surprise, face full of disbelief and wonder as he takes in the sight of Carolyn approaching on her horse.

“Oh my god,” Dave whispers, slowly moving closer to Carolyn as if being pulled by a magnet. She pulls on the reins, coming to a stop and you finally get a good look at her face. She’s aged gracefully, you can see the ghost of the girl she was from the photos Dave showed you. Right now her face is mirroring Dave’s shock as she slides down from the horse and approaches him.

“Dave,” she whispers, stepping closer to him. “Is it really you?”

“Si, Caro,” Dave says, coming the distance between them and grabbing her hands. “It’s me.”

Aaron’s standing next to you, watching Dave and Carolyn reconnect, watching their eyes search the others’ faces and seeing the changes from nearly 50 years apart. You don’t notice the tension between you and Aaron, the tension still lingering from last night's kiss. You’re too focused on Dave and Carolyn as they smile at each other.

“I’m a little late, Caro,” Dave says, voice thick with emotion and you can picture the tears welling in his eyes.

“You’re here now, that’s what matters,” Carolyn responds.

And then they’re kissing. It’s chaste, but you can see how tightly they’re holding on to each other, needing that contact to believe they’re together again. When they part, they’re still smiling and then Dave is turning, beckoning to Aaron and you.

“Caro, I need to introduce some people to you,” Dave says, shifting so he’s standing next to her, arm around her shoulders. He gestures to Aaron and smiles broadly. “This is Aaron Hotchner, he’s a dear friend and basically family, and he insisted on coming here to find you with me.” Aaron goes to shake Carolyn’s hand and she laughs, pulling him into a hug instead and kissing him on both cheeks. The tips of Aaron’s ears are red and you bite back a laugh, focusing instead on Dave who’s introducing you now. “- a writer, from New York, who wrote the letter that convinced me to come here and find you,” he’s saying, smiling softly at you.

Carolyn kisses you on both cheeks as she hugs you too, holding on to your arms as her expression conveys the thanks she cannot say. You nod and pat her hand, silently telling her you understand.

She turns back to Dave, taking his hand and smiling at him. “You all have to stay for lunch. You have to meet my family, and I want to hear about yours,” she says, nodding at each of you. You smile weakly, and catch Aaron looking at you from the corner of your eye. But you ignore him, instead nodding at Carolyn.

Carolyn’s family comes up to her, trying to figure out what’s going on. She’s explaining in rapid Italian, hands gesturing to you, Aaron, and Dave and then her daughter is nodding, catching on and moving to bring you all to the big house.

There’s a large table out behind the house, on a little covered patio. The Bartolini’s settle around it, leaving space near Carolyn’s spot at the head for you, Dave, and Aaron. There’s an impressive spread of food on the table, plus wine, and you all tuck in to lunch, getting to know each other over the food.

Once you’ve all had a chance to eat and get to know each other, Carolyn stands up and gets her family’s attention. “Mi famiglia, today I went on a ride as an old woman, and came back a teenager.” She pauses as everyone around the table chuckles. “Truly though, it’s been the greatest gift to have Dave come back here and to have him meet all of you, and for us to have met Aaron and their wonderful friend who is responsible for all of this,” she continues, gesturing to each of you as she talks. After a moment, she starts up again, “Dave, you have told me that you lost your Hayden, and you know that I have lost my Giovanni,” she says, voice wavering with emotion, “but destiny wanted us to meet again. Grazie destino.”

Everyone echoes the sentiment as Carolyn sits back down and grabs Dave’s hand. They haven’t let go of each other for more than a few moments since they saw each other. It’s sweet, seeing them reconnect and hang on to one another. Seeing that physical manifestation of love that’s lasted over the years.

“Caro,” Dave says quietly, “I’m sorry I was late.”

She smiles softly at him, “No, no. When we are talking about love, you can never be late.”

You smile at them before turning back to your plate. Lunch finishes not long after that, the younger children congregating in the yard to kick around a soccer ball. You see Carolyn and Dave wander towards the fields hand in hand and you smile as you sink down into a chair, a warm feeling spreading through your chest.

At least someone gets a happy ending, and you can finally finish your story. And then go back to New York, hopefully get your piece published, and move on to the next story. No more seeing Aaron, no more seeing Dave, this whole trip fading into a simple memory. You blow out a sigh, staunchly ignoring the tears pricking at the corner of your eyes.

“Well, there’s your ending, huh?” Aaron says, walking up from behind your chair. You twist to look at him, a confused look on your face. “Just when all hope is lost, she rides in at the last minute on a white horse. Who’s gonna believe that?” Aaron asks, running a hand through his hair. You shrug, still so uncertain what to say to him after last night. After you just walked away. Before you can even open your mouth to attempt to say something, anything, about it, Aaron’s walking around to sit on the table in front of you. He says your name urgently, immediately grabbing your full attention. “Promise me you’ll finish the story. It needs to be shared, and your writing deserves to be seen,” he says, voice full of conviction.

“Of course,” you whisper, nodding. Aaron nods too, wiping his hands on his slacks.

After a moment he lets out a breath and meets your eyes. “So I guess this is it. And I’m sorry it is.”

“I guess it is.” You lick your lips, still searching for the words to explain last night but again, Aaron beats you to it again.

When he says your name this time, there’s a weight to it, sincere feelings behind it. “I, I never should have kissed you last night,” he says, glancing down at his hands. You control your face, trying not to let it crumple and show your disappointment. “I was completely out of bounds, you’re still grieving and I’m-” He clears his throat and runs his palms over his knees. “Well, I shouldn’t have done it.”

You swallow around the lump in your throat and nod in understanding, even passing agreement. Of course, he’s not actually interested in you. It was a spur of the moment thing. Something that never should have happened. No matter how much you want it to happen again, no matter how hard your heart clenches when you look at Aaron.

So you do what you have to. You look back up at Aaron, meet his eyes, and say, “I guess it’s time to go then.” And then you’re pressing a kiss to his cheek and standing, walking away without looking back, again. Ignoring the tears forming, again.

You focus on Carolyn and Dave, who have come back from the fields, and jog up to them. “Hi,” you say smiling tightly at them, “I, uhm, I need to get back to Verona. My flight to New York -”

“Oh, of course! I’ll have Aaron take the car, we’ll get you back, no worries,” Dave says, moving to untangle himself from Carolyn but you’re shaking your head.

“No, no, Dave, I can’t take you away from this place,” you protest, tears pricking at the corners of your eyes. “You should stay here, you and Aaron. This is what you came here for anyway.”

Carolyn steps forward, putting a hand on your shoulder. “My son can drive you. It’s no worries,” she says and you nod your thanks, finding it hard to speak. She squeezes your shoulder before unwinding her arm from around Dave’s waist and searching for her son.

Dave puts his hands on your arms as he searches your face, noticing the tears in your eyes threatening to fall. “Is something wrong?”

You shake your head, “No, it’s just,” you shrug and glance around your surroundings, “all of this is...” you trail off unable to find the words.

“I know,” he whispers, bringing you in for a hug. “An angel brought you to me,” he says, kissing your cheeks. You smile wetly, and he wraps an arm around your shoulder, walking you towards the front of the house. Carolyn and her son are already there, grabbing your bag from the rental car and moving it into theirs.

You hug Carolyn, kiss her cheeks, and thank her as you climb into the passenger seat. Dave waves goodbye as he wraps an arm around Carolyn again and hugs her close. And then your door is closed and the car is moving, Dave and Carolyn waving to you as they grow smaller in your vision, going blurry as the tears finally fall.

Back at the house, Dave looks around Carolyn to see Aaron walking towards them. He kisses Carolyn’s temple and then stands next to him. “Aaron, we’re practically family so I think you understand why I’m telling you you’re an idiot.”

Aaron whips his head towards Dave, brow furrowed. “Sure, don’t sugarcoat it Dave,” he grumbles, arms crossed.

“I won’t,” Dave says. “You don’t know where this one will end up settling. Don’t wait 50 years to get your head out of your ass like I did.”

Dave’s words slowly register with Aaron. He realizes what Dave is saying, is telling him, and it hits him instantly. He’s fallen for you. He’s in love with you. Aaron springs into action, running to the car and driving off after you.

Halfway to Verona, Aaron thinks about what he’s doing. About what he’ll say when he finds you. He looks around to the empty seat next to him. Or almost empty. There’s a pen there, one that fell out of your bag this morning. He pulls over to the side of the road and picks it up, holding it reverently in his hand. The only piece of you in this car, the only evidence you’d been here at all.

He sighs, the realization washing over him. He can’t follow you to Verona, can’t think of anything he could say to you. Can’t think of anything except how you’ve already walked away from him twice. He can’t risk you walking away again, not with Jack to think about. You’re heading back to New York, he’s going back to DC and will probably never leave. Even if he had proof that you did like him, that you love him the way he loves you, he can’t risk putting Jack through that, much less himself.

So he sighs and turns the car around, heading back to Carolyn’s.

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#aaron hotchner #criminal minds #letters to juliet #aaron hotchner x reader #gender neutral reader #gn reader #letters to juliet au #my writing #fic stuff #what if tag #aaron hotchner x gn!reader #criminal minds fanfiction #aaron hotchner fanfiction #romcom au

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project-rosewood-476 · 3 years

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Chapter 2 part 1 Of Every Rose Has Its Thorns is out now! the AU and some of the ideas and characters belong to @creepypasta-shtick and Maplehood Creek, Rosewood, and Tabby Anderson belong to me.

TW: character death, mentions of blood and gore

Tabby was always an early bird due to her stepdad getting her up at 5 in the morning. Also with Rosewood starting at 7:45 am. But she slept through until 7-8 in the morning. Tabby woke up and stretched and winced at her bruises. She slowly sat up and rubbed her eyes confused. This wasn't her house. This wasn't her room...then last nights events came rushing back to her

"So it wasn't a dream after all... and I'm alive...I survived my first night in this strange new world. One day down and another one to go" she said in thought. she grinned as the new reality set in.

"I'm free...of my stepdad, Rosewood, and Horacio!" She said in thought also she let out a quiet giggle to herself.

She got out of the bed and put her knives on the nightstand for now. She took a good look at herself in the mirror. Her red-brown hair turned into a messy low ponytail with a couple of wavy strands that were out. That was due to the tossing and turning in her sleep. She still had dark circles under her eyes and they still appeared to be sunken back slightly. But they had that spark of life back in them again. But you can never catch up on lost sleep. She fell asleep in her clothes from yesterday but she'll change today. She really had no use for PJs she only used them on occasion. Her older bruises were almost completely faded away and her new ones started the healing process. Pretty soon all there would be was the scars from her old life and new bruises and cuts from training and missions and stuff. Hopefully less than what she has now.

She quickly got dressed in a long-sleeved white shirt and blue jeans to cover up the scars and bruises. She was more clear-minded than she was last night. No one else needed to see her bruises and scars and think that she's weak and sickly. She put on her shoes and went out of her bedroom and into the kitchen.

Toby has done a lot for her in one night. It was only fair to return the favor. The least she could do is cook him breakfast. She looked in the fridge and saw some eggs. She took out the carton and put it on the counter. She saw some bread laying about too and saw a toaster.

"Perfect!" She thought to herself.

She looked around for a frying pan, plates, and utensils. It took her a while to find the stuff in the kitchen but she made her way around and made very little noise as possible. And was humming a song that she knew to herself. She put the two pieces of bread in the toaster and started making the eggs for herself first.

Toby was still kind of groggy but he pulled himself up and yawned. It took him a little while to get used to being awake so he waited for a bit before turning off his radio. He went up to go to the bathroom. He had several wounds he needed to make sure stayed clean after all. After cleaning himself up, he figured he should go out and get the newspaper or something. He knew that after a couple of weeks he would have a huge mission that would involve putting on a fake identity and infiltrating a school, which he was not looking forward to. He was incredibly anxious about it. From the bathroom, he could hear a knock on the front door. Oh right. He had locked it. It was probably Jane and she had probably finished Tabby's mask that night.

Tabby put her eggs and toast on a plate and went to answer the front door. She unlocked it and opened the door a little bit. warily and cautiously.

Jane had left the box on the front door. It was a nice-looking box. It could be easily opened. She had stayed up all night doing the mask.

Tabby opened the door wider and cautiously picked up the box. She eyed it suspiciously. She decided to leave it on the table and decided to wait for Toby to come out so she wouldn't be alone while opening it just in case it could be a trap.

Tabby began to eat her breakfast. She kept eyeing the box in a mixture of suspicion and curiosity. She wanted to open it badly but decided that she knew better than to open it by herself as Jane's words echoed through her head from last night.

'Don't trust gifts that are given to you even if they're given by people you know, there are a lot of backstabbers here'.

She continued to wait patiently.

Toby came outside the bathroom and headed towards the kitchen. He saw Tabby and the box.

"Oh. That looks like the box Jane uses to deliver masks." He stared plainly.

He went to the fridge and began rifling through it. Jane's boxes always looked distinct to show that they carried masks that she had made her own.

"Oh you don't have to rummage through the fridge," she said in between bites "I was going to make you some eggs as a sort of a thank you. But then I realized that I don't know how you like your eggs...or even if you like eggs...I also didn't know if you were like me in needing to watch your food being made to make sure it's not poisoned. So I waited before I did anything."

"But if you do like eggs how do you like them? I could make you some..." she said a little shyly as she looked down and went to open the box.

She opened the box slowly and warily. She took out the mask and inspected it. It was a pretty teal with golden spirals branching out from one another and at some angles, the gold glittered in the light. She checked the inside of the mask and smiled to herself when she saw the names of the people she lost engraved inside. She put it on and looked at Toby.

"Oh, it's okay. I'm the type of person who likes taking care of myself." Toby explained.

He had needed to make his own breakfast since he was 8, and a change from routine would just feel somewhat alien. He thanked her for her offer though. He turned when he felt the air somewhat shift and saw that she had put on her mask.

"Oh, that looks great. Does it feel okay? Natural?" He asked. He got out some leftover breakfast from the day before and went to heat it up.

"Fair enough," she said.

She understood not wanting to rely on others since she has been neglected since she was 4 so she had to learn how to do the basics of taking care of herself.

"It feels weird at first but I'll get used to it" she put the mask in her box and went to pick up the eggs and put them back in the fridge.

She finished up the last bit of her egg sandwich that she made and went to do up her little bit of dishes. She unwrapped her left hand so the bandages can stay clean and dry. You could see the surgical incisions that were made to get the glass out. The scars were in that in-between stage of old and fresh. Her hand was healed but you can tell that the doctors didn't set it right as it looked out of place.

Toby nodded.

"It will feel weird at first but soon you'll freak out seeing yourself without it."

He wanted to make the transition into this new life as painless as possible. He remembered being incredibly freaked out at the beginning. He noticed her hand. Oh, man. EJ would lose his shit 'seeing' the work done on that hand. Toby thanked her for doing her dishes.

"By the way, you said you wanted to go to the library today?" Toby said. "While we're out, I could sort of show you around if you want. A lot of your first missions will be fetch and deliver, so it's nice to know where to go." He was finishing up his breakfast.

"Yeah I did say that and it would be nice to know my way around. I mean I'm going to be on my own at some point so yeah"

She dried off her hands and notice that he was looking at her damaged hand.

"Yeah I know it's not a pretty picture. Reason number 1025 of why I hate and don't trust doctors. They can't do their damn jobs right" she gave him a bitter smile.

"So your mission was fairly riskless huh?" She raised an eyebrow as she nodded towards his injuries "I do hope you took care of them properly" she gently re-wrapped her hand in the bandages.

Toby nodded.

"Yeah, you will be. Once you finish training, the boss will give you a new place." He said. "I'll show you around, introduce you to a few people." He said.

"I understand the sentiment about doctors though, but for me it's therapists. My therapist knew I was abused and, as a mandated reporter, didn't call CPS for me." He said.

He knew there were competent doctors and therapists, but that didn't change his experiences.

At her comment, he nodded. "They're just small cuts and bruises. Come from running through the woods." He said.

"Same. I hated therapists too. I've been through 7 psychiatrists. My parents believed that I was delusional and paranoid because they didn't believe me about my horror stories at Rosewood. My therapists didn't believe anything I said about Rosewood or about how my stepdad abused me but left the rest of my family out of it" she gave him the finger guns and another bitter smile but she looked like she just wanted to die.

Toby nodded. "I got a therapist after my sister died. I still remember her. She was this older woman, about the same age as my mom and she always had this fake, vacant smile. It used to piss me off." He said.

He understood.

"They used my mental illness to totally discredit what I saw and what I said happened to me. She tried to have me involuntarily committed."

Toby shrugged a bit while clearing his dishes.

"I've thought about killing her, honestly, but I figured it wasn't really worth it." He said, starting the water

"But they did manage to diagnose me correctly on OCD, Anxiety, PTSD, and Paranoia which all had to do with Rosewood and my stepdad but not for the reasons that they thought. We're probably missing a few others since they can't diagnose me fully correctly", stated Tabby.

"I understand," Toby said.

He finished cleaning up his dishes. He already was dressed for the day and was still wearing his mouth guard and goggles. He put on his gloves.

"You ready to go in a bit?" He asked.

"Honestly they're just doing it to get paid and not caring how they do it" "I've thought about killing my stepdad and I would have if it was just my mom and not...someone else involved...", she trailed off and looked away.

"Well, I killed my dad," Toby said with a shrug.

"And I let my mom find the body." He put his dishes away.

"I feel like my life would be so much different if I had actually had a decent therapist. I know they're out there and I'm just so pissed that I got a shitty one. If I had one that actually cared, I probably would still be human."

"Lucky you. I would have done the same but I never had the luxury to be selfish. This is the first time I actually put myself first"

She knew that wasn't entirely true either. She would have gladly let masky and hoodie kill her. She wouldn't even have had to put up a fight. But toby was the one who spared her life and he did it for a reason. She promised herself that she would stay alive for him so his efforts wouldn't go in vain. It wouldn't be fair to him if she died. On top of her promises to kill Horacio and avenge her friends. But he doesn't need to know that.

"Yeah I'll be ready to go in a few minutes I just need to brush my hair and teeth real quick." She said not ignoring his previous statement.

Tabby went to her room to get her things and went into the bathroom to do her thing. She came out with a neater-looking ponytail. She grabbed the box and headed back to her room to put her things away. She then came back out wearing her thick red plaid jacket that she always wore with her gray hood up and put her new mask on.

"I'm ready to go"

Toby nodded. "Alright. Let's go." He said. He was in his usual attire. It was worn, but clean.

"Do you want to go to the library first, or would you like me to show you around first?"

"I would like to go to the library first please if that's okay. Afterward, it will give us time for you to show me around and meet a few people", said Tabby.

"Okay, that works. There are some things that you'll want to know about the library through." Toby explained.

Tabby paused for a minute "Which are?" She trailed off.

"Well, the librarians are all disgraced proxies and monsters as well as retired proxies," Toby said.

"And usually you're not supposed to talk to the librarians unless it's for something strictly about the library. However, the librarians are very smart and have very large comprehensive knowledge over things."

Tabby nodded slowly in understanding "okay I got it. I don't usually talk to anyone in general"

"If you get on their good side, they'll defend you though," Toby said. "A lot of stuff can go down at the library."

She snorted "doesn't surprise me"

She had a mini flashback to the library at Rosewood. She was a bookworm and the library was the least sinister place in the school. Even though it too carried its own dark secrets of Rosewood. Libraries were considered sacred and neutral ground at Rosewood.

Toby knew of a proxy who had gotten beaten to death in the library. The library was usually quiet but sometimes could get very messy. He held the door for her. It was good practice to say goodbye to the desk lady before they left.

"Is that all?" She asked.

"Yeah, pretty much. Would you like me to stay there with you?", he asked.

"Yes, please. Two is better than one right?"

She mentally cursed herself for saying yes. She had to prove to him at some point that she could take care of herself and hold her own. But she didn't want to be left in this strange new world that was day 2 for her. Especially around strangers who wouldn't hesitate to kill her if given the chance. If she had someone with her the chances of that happening would be slim to none. And she was taught from a young age that you never go anywhere alone. Especially in Maplehood unless you had to.

"Survival reasons", she told him to justify herself, "I'm fresh meat as it is and curiosity about the new girl is inevitable. I'm crippled and small and I would be alone which means it would be easy for someone to kill me without a second thought. I'm young, not stupid so it's better to go with someone and only go alone if I absolutely have to".

She babbled on her reasoning to him and she was getting defensive about it because she didn't want him to think that she was a little bitch that can't take care of herself.

Toby understood. She didn't need to justify herself to him, he understood.

"Hey, it really is okay. I'll just sit nearby and maybe chat to a few people." Toby was decently popular.

"Okay… can we go now?" She asked.

"Yeah," Toby said. He moved to let her out of the apartment.

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leejihoonownsmyheart · 3 years

Text

Click, Click

Chapters: 1, 2, 3, 4 , 5 , 6 , 7, 8 , 9 , 10 , 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29

Chapter Thirty:

The worst part about being crazy was the way people acted when they realized you were crazy.

People always treated you oddly. Some as if you were as fragile as glass, others treated you like the most precious thing in life. Overall no one treated you the right way. You weren’t some trophy to be won, only to be kept up on a shelf for the rest of your life.

You weren’t some token that helped people achieve things in their lives, and yet you were constantly fighting for basic human recognition. People always treated you differently and then the minute they put together the pieces of why... They gave you the look.

You couldn’t stand it. Not because it came from strangers or form people in your life that meant practically nothing to you. But because it always came from people who knew you. People who should be able to understand. But no one ever did.

Instead, they made their realizations and they looked at you... Like they were scared of you and it was terrifying.

It was terrifying to see them stare at you and make the realization that you were unhinged, and you would do whatever you felt was necessary to protect the people you cared about. And that terror that gripped your heart when someone looked at you scared just made you angry.

This was a close friend who was supposed to love you, to trust you unconditionally. But instead, they were terrified of you. They didn’t trust you in the least.

And on top of that, they would proceed to compare themselves to you- Something you may not have minded were in not for that damned look. The one that told you the people that you cared about the most and would die for, didn’t care about you in that way in the slightest.

“You’re what?”

You hadn’t been thrilled to meet the CEO of Pledis.

After all, he was the man who made thirteen of your favorite people in the world work harder then they needed to. The man who put so much stress on those same thirteen people that you felt like most people had to worry about them too much. And he was the man, who didn’t seen to appreciate how hard the boys worked for him.

He promoted Nuest badly, and he let Pristin break up and he did a number of things you simply didn’t agree with.

And the fact that these awful decisions still got made despite the fact that Seventeen was there fighting for their futures under the company made you realize that he must be a difficult man to pick a battle with and win.

So standing before him, hand in hand with Jihoon- heart thumping in your chest at the prospect of him saying something about you that you didn’t want to hear or convincing Jihoon that he didn’t need you in his life or something terrifying like that was pretty much all you were thinking as you looked at the man.

“I’m dating y/n,” Jihoon repeated firmly. He wasn’t as scared of the situation as you were. INfact you noted that you hardly ever saw him scared. He was a fairly easy-going person it seemed. Hard to nudge towards any extreme unless he was with the boys and he was really happy. “And Carats found out, and now you need to make an announcement that we are dating.”

He paused and shrugged, tugging you closer to his body.

“Or I will.”

The threat in the air sent a very real chill through your body despite the fact it was rehearsed. Seungcheol’s plan of course. Jihoon was going to play the hard ball- be stubborn and unwavering- and you would be less so to make the CEO like you, and maybe possibly not insist you two break up.

“He doesn’t mean that!” You interrupted, a nervous laugh bubbling in your chest. “He just means that we need to do something before things blow up.”

The CEO’s face only got redder and redder as you two spoke, the anger clearly growing. It made you tighten your grip on Jihoon’s hand unsurely- and you felt Jihoon mirror that reaction.

“What do you two think that you can do? Just come here and demand I do what you want so you love birds can stay together?” He asked. “Did Seungcheol tell you to do this? Jihoon you know the rules of dating.”

Jihoon opened his mouth to argue with the CEO but you placed a hand over his free hand to stop him from doing so.r

“Look other idols have been able to manage without much backlash,” you stated softly. “The world is changing. Don’t you think that maybe-”

“No.”

He slammed his hands down on his desk, a serious expression crossing his face.

“You two are going to break up. Jihoon is getting suspended from the group- I can’t tell you what comeback he’ll be allowed back in but studio songs and everything? That’s definitely being taken away from you-”

“We aren’t breaking up. Carats won’t like an album written by someone else. Who are you going to hire?”

“Bumzu,” the CEO fired back. “He’s wrapped around my little finger all I have to do is say the word.”

“If you take away my song writing I will leave this company, and Seventeen will follow me.”

“Do you think anyone is going to want to have to manage a group of thirteen children one of which broke a rule he knew was there just for some foreigner to seduce him?”

Your mouth fell open at the insult to your own proud but you weren’t angry about that. You were angry about something else that he had said.

“Do you really think that Seventeen needs you?” You blurted. The CEO looked surprised by the outburst, as did Jihoon. “They don’t need you. Nor will they ever need you. They could manage themselves on their own and even if they did not a company they could always just go to PSY Nation who I know for a fact would be able to handle them better then you do.”

The CEO opened his mouth but the reddness was draining from his face- he knew you were right.

“Without Seventeen your entire company will crumble. They’re the majority of your income, and you’ve proven again and again that you can’t handle managing groups. If you don’t let us handle this situation it could mean the collapse of this shitty company- and that only sucks for one person and that’s you.”

Silence fell over the room at your words and Jihoon looked between you and the CEO wondering what was going to happen next. Finally the CEO sighed heavily and he clicked a buzzer on his desk.

“Get me on the line with every news network in the city that cares,” he said over the buzzer. “Lee Jihoon of Seventeen has a girlfriend.”

You hadn’t thought it was possible for a weekend to be as chaotic as this one, but everything sort of flew off the rails at that point.

You spent literally every second with Jihoon, his fingers tightly knitted with yours. You two went from interview to interview to do damage control and explain to everyone in Korea that you were dating. It wasn’t the most fun. Korean’s were mean.

Each and every little word out of their mouths was a chip at your intelligence, at your appearance, at you and Jihoon didn’t really seem to notice.

“I never imagined that was the sort of girl that would be your type,” One host joked.

“I thought foreigners were supposed to be prettier.”

“She’s not really... Much is she.” You honestly didn’t really think you had ever felt more insulted in your life, and that was saying a lot considering that you pretty much didn’t trust that anyone in your life actually thought that you were doing anything right.

But despite your anxieties, you kept to yourself, reminding yourself that all would be alright- in time. Jihoon had done a lot for you. Whether he thought he had or not, and this was the least you could do for Jihoon.

No- It was everything that you had to do for Jihoon. If you didn’t do this, you didn’t deserve the right to be his girlfriend. You just needed to breath evenly, and trust Jihoon.

It was weird, you had to admit, going out with a facemask and a hat on. After only doing it a few times, you decided to just stay at Jihoon’s instead of leaving every night, and frankly no one was protesting.

“What if... You and Jihoon did a choreography together?” Soonyoung suggested as your feet dangled over Jihoon’s lap. You looked over at the boy, who wasn’t even looking at you. Instead, he was toying around with a tiger plushie.

“Sounds fun,” you said, but you didn’t really mean it. It sounded like busy work. Something that you could completely submerge yourself in and let take over you as you waited for this all to end. “What dance should we do?”

“Rewrite the Stars,” Jihoon replied. You were surprised by his immediate response, but you didn’t say that.

“Alright,” you agreed. “Rewrite the stars.”

It seemed fitting as a song for you two to do but you couldn’t help but notice after your millionth watch that it seemed really difficult. You had to be really emotive, and have a lot of control over your body. Not only that, but it mostly had the girl as the center it was barely a duet, and more a solo.

“I don’t know about this one Jihoon,” you mumbled. “It seems...” “You can do it,” Jihoon interrupted. You gave him a pressed look and turned the computer to show him what you were looking at.

“You see that move, ten seconds in I absolutely can’t do that,” you insisted. Jihoon didn’t even look at the screen.

“Not with that attitude you can’t.”

“And,” you continued, deciding to ignore his indifference. “Yoojung Lee is a really emotional dancer. I can’t be even half as emotive as she is.”

Jihoon glanced over at you an incredulous expression on his face.

“Do you even know yourself?” He asked. You opened your mouth to inform him that you did, and that was how you knew that you would not be able to do this dance, and that he thought too highly of you, but before you could say that, Jihoon contined speaking: “You can easily do this. You’re just as good as Yoojung Lee.”

Such a statement was equally comforting and discomforting at the same time.

You really liked that Jihoon was so confident in your skills as a dancer. You had always wanted to be with someone who was a big supporter of you and everything that you did. After all, you were, deep down, rather ambitious. You liked to do a lot of different activities that you needed to be good at. You didn’t often yield much support from people outside of:

“Oh, you can almost do it as well as me” or with some digging for it maybe a: “That is really good actually.” Neither of course being an ideal situation.

You supposed in a why, Jihoon had picked a perfect song.

You didn’t think it was possible for you to dance with someone like Jihoon. You thought the fans would rip you to shreds, and you would do the dance moves wrong, and you would mess up, but Jihoon was right there.

Maybe if Jihoon thought you could do it, everything really would be okay.

The dance itself required a lot of body control. Outside of facials and fluidity, the biggest command from the dance was being able to move yourself limb by limb. It wasn’t an easy feat for most people, much less you. The dances you did didn’t often require such control, and generally when you did dances it was with a large number of other people so your control wasn’t focused on.

But with this song, it would only be you and Jihoon, and rotated through a few members of Seventeen in the background to show their support, so you would have to be perfect.

The first thing that you had to focus on was the arm movement only a few seconds in the dance. Turning over your left shoulder, and drifting your hands through the air was easy. But making your arms wave so fluidly was going to be difficult.

Luckily, past that, and making sure each move looked clean, the hardest part of the dance could be overlooked. Soojung was a very thoughtful choreographer. She hit a lot of the beats in the song that many people missed.

That made it easier to follow her dance movements, because it was like you could feel the way the dance was supposed to go while watching her and hearing the music.

You turned over your shoulder, hands touching your head as you waved them down. The song practically reverberated through your body as you waved your arms in a ripple. Each movement, coming to you faster and easier then you had thought it would.

“You look great,” Jihoon complimented as you too hit the final pose, his shoulder brushing against your back. You looked back at him.

“I could be better. You make it look so easy.”

You knew that you were being hard on yourself but you hadn’t become a dancer that Jihoon thought could actually do this stuff without working hard.

You flipped over your shoulder, your back to Jihoon’s as you turned your hands in, and began to flutter your fingers. Each dance move making you feel more and more tired. You were getting a lot better, but good enough for the Carats? You weren’t sure.

“I’ll call the boys in and we’ll film,” Jihoon suggested. You turned to him, a nervous smile on your lips.

“Can we film tomorrow?” You asked. “I just know I can get it, but tomorrow for sure.”

Jihoon relented, and stayed in the practice room with you all night while you practiced.

With a formal introduction of you and Jihoon’s relationship in the form of a dance cover posted on the internet, you felt a little bit better about everything. The hope was that seeing you and Jihoon dance together would be enough to make Carats relent with the backlash you two were receiving.

It wasn’t the worst backlash you could be facing. Carats were pretty considerate, but there was still backlash, nonetheless.

“You doing okay?” Jihoon asked you softly. You turned off your phone, wishing you hadn’t been looking at yet another article about you two.

“Yeah,” you lied. Jihoon sighed.

“We need to get you out of these dorms,” Jihoon mumbled. “You’re getting sad again.”

He was right. You hadn’t felt very good in the last little while, and nothing that you usually did was helping you to feel better. Being close to Jihoon was only going to help so much.

“We can’t going anywhere,” you stated softly.

“Sure we can,” Jihoon replied. “We’ll just go grab something to eat. See the night lights.” You knew ultimately it was a bad idea, but you let Jihoon convince you into it anyways. He was so happy by the idea of running out and grabbing some Ramen and taking a walk in the park that it made you happy to think abot as well.

You thought maybe everything would be okay.

It of course wasn’t. As soon as you got out on the streets the two of you were swarmed by people.

And Suddenly, you felt... Nothing.

It wasn’t like you hadn’t expected really. Walking out of a building to be surrounded by hundreds and hundreds of people all tuned in to you and what you were doing. You had always imagined it would pull your brain in too many different directions. So much so that you ended up being dumb to what was actually happening. You thought you would get overwhelmed.

Instead, your brain just... Stopped being able to focus on anything.

You couldn’t hear what people were saying. You couldn’t see what people were doing. In fact you weren’t even really sure anymore where you were or who was near you. Your brain just stopped processing everything.

You knew that there was an angry crowd of people there. You knew that you needed to be responsible and own up to all of the sneaking around that you and Jihoon had been doing. You knew that you needed to be strong, and not shut down, bu...

There was nothing. You just suddenly felt like you had stopped existing.

Until warm fingers wrapped around your wrist.

And then you were brought into reality.

Well, a sort of reality.

Jihoon wrapped his arms around you, pulling you close against his body. He was quiet and calm despite it all and most importantly, was as gentle as he needed to be. Your heart, strangely enough, was beating out of control. Your body was stable, you weren’t scared.

It was strange to think that you felt safe here with Jihoon, despite everyone that was around you. But you were.

You wrapped your arms around his waist, and in response he pulled you closer, his lips burying themselves in your hair.

“I love you,” he mumbled.

“No matter what,” you agreed softly.

You didn’t need the affirmation, but you did appreciate it. It was nice to hear that you were loved as often as Jihoon felt like it needed to be said. He really did know you well, you supposed.

As you two stood there, finding solace in the eye of a storm, you noticed that the carats at the edge of the circle had stopped screaming. They were no longer hoisting their large signs up and down in the air, and instead were just standing there staring at you and Jihoon quietly.

In fact, they stood there in silent observation until the point where you noticed that no one was standing there and yelling obscenities at you any longer. Instead, they had confused expressions. Eyebrows slightly quirked in question.

If you had been Jihoon you surely would have been confused.

Why were they so confused? Why are they staring at us like that?

But as a carat, you weren’t confused at all.

You could feel what it was like from their point of view. Their anger melted away and they realized that Jihoon had found someone who made him happy- and that person, whether you could truly believe it or not- was you.

The fans didn’t have to say a word to one another. Instead, they silently began to make a path, moving away the reporters so that you and Jihoon could safely escape. You tugged Jihoon gently.

“We can go,” you mumbled softly. Jihoon looked surprised. He must not have been watching.

“How?” He asked.

You shrugged, and said possibly the cheesiest line that would ever leave your mouth in your entire lifetime:

“I guess the power of love.”

Chapter Thirty-One

#Lee Jihoon #Lee Jihoon Seventeen #Lee Jihoon Series #Woozi #Woozi Seventeen #Woozi Series #Woozi AU #Lee Jihoon AU #Seventeen Fanfiction #Seventeen Fanfic #Woozi Fanfiction #Woozi Fanfic #Lee Jihoon Fanfiction #Lee Jihoon Fanfic #Kpop Fanfiction #Kpop Fanfic

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myblueeyedbuggers · 3 years

Text

My Boys

Chapter 10

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8 Chapter 9 Chapter 11 Chapter 12 Chapter 13 Chapter 14

Pairings: Reader x Steve Rogers (best friend) Reader x Bucky Barnes

Word Count:1843

Warnings: Slow Start, Language.

Summary: After being abandoned by her parents in Brooklyn in 1929, y/n makes a living for herself by working for the Црни лабуд gang until she meets two boys in a back alley and her life slowing begins to change.

Annnddd I’m back! so I know it’s been a while since the last update and I just wanna thank you all for having patience with me while I finished up with college, just a warning this chapter may feel a little awkward to read due to me just getting back into my writing mind so apologises in advance for this one. Anyways I’ll quit blabbering, Enjoy everyone! :)

This was my day of reckoning, my punishment for all the bad deeds I’d done over the past couple of years…I was finally being sent to school. Okay maybe that was a tad dramatic, but can you blame me? I mean who wants to be trapped in a building against their will for 7 hours straight learning about dead guys?! No sane person would willingly agree to that crap!

I’ve tried just about everything to avoid my approaching doom, hell I even went as far as hiding in the basement surrounded by cobwebs to try and get out of this, but as per usual neither Steve or Bucky took mercy on me, hence why in currently trapped between the two. “You are aware I’m perfectly capable of walkin’ by myself aren’t ya? The looping of the arms is not needed boys” I swear down these two are being more annoying than usual, and I didn’t think that was humanly possible cause these two are basically the living embodiment of annoyance. Steve turned and raised his eyebrows at me, shaking his head as he let out a small laugh, “Yeah there’s absolutely no way I’m fallin’ for that again, last time that happened it look me and Buck an hour to get you outta that tree”. Ah crap there goes that plan.

I’m pretty sure the noise I made wasn’t even human, it was a mix between a seal and a possessed monkey “I’m not gonna get outta this am I?” “Nope” and que another frustrated groan. “Is this payback for the time I placed that bucket of flour above your bedroom door and watched the both of you turn into ghosts? If it is then I want you to know I regret nothin’” both of them stopped and glared at me, for some reason they didn’t find that as funny as I did, and I have no idea why. Okay whatever you do y/n don’t laugh, even if Steve’s face looks like a slapped arse don’t laugh! A snicker slipped past my lips and a few seconds later I was full on laughin’. Goddamn it.

Both of em just let out a bunch of sighs and started draggin’ my butt along the street, wait there’s somethin’ I haven’t tried yet…in hindsight this is completely stupid but screw it. “OH MY GOD LOOK A SPACESHIP!” I’m pretty sure poor Bucky jumped outta his skin, Steve ended up trippin’ up and falling down, I’ll admit that I felt bad about but hey may plan worked! So why am I still standin’ there?… maybe we try this thing called running y/n! I quickly pulled my arm away from Bucky and used my new-found freedom to run in the opposite direction of them, I could hear the shouts of protest from the both of them, so I decided to kindly ignore them and absolutely leg it. “GODAMMN IT Y/N! THIS IS THE FIFTH TIME THIS MORNIN’!” when were the boys gonna catch on that I didn’t wanna go? Do I need to prepare a firework show and blast it in their faces or somethin’…probably.

I know I probably shouldn’t be smiling, but the feeling of the wind flowing through my hair as my feet hit the ground made me feel free, after so many years I could finally begin acting my age and enjoy my childhood. I finally felt content with my life, which is probably the opposite of what I should be feeling at this moment in time, considering I was currently making my grand escape. And to completely honest I’ve got no bloody clue as to where I am. I glanced behind me to see where the hell those idiots were, to my surprise Steve was directly behind me, Buck was somewhere in the back holdin’ his knee and I’m guessing the daft sod decked it. Why am I not surprised? Okay maybe I should of kept my mouth shut cause literally a second later my foot tripped over a rock and, you guessed correctly, I landed on my ass for the thousandth time!

“Sh*t! Cr*p! B*lls! That f**king hurt!” and that ladies and gentlemen is my fine command of the queens English, a groan of pain made me loose my train of thought as I turned my head to Steve, to put it simply he was laid flat on his back with his eye closed. Well there’s the rush of guilt I’ve been waiting for, “Sh*t Steve I’m sorry, you okay down there tough guy?” I quickly offered him my hand to help him up, I mean it’s the least I could do. Steve’s hand grabbed mine, a not so quiet grunt of pain made me feel even worse, quick question why am I such an assh*le at times? “Yeah, I’m fine y/n, don’t worry about it you know for a fact I’ve had worse” a quiet sigh left my lips as I brought him in for a hug, which was a tiny bit awkward due to the height difference. Once we pulled away from each other, I couldn’t supress the need to check him for anymore injuries, much to Steve’s embarrassment and Bucky’s amusement, “Jesus I’m gonna have to start wrapping ya up in blankets and pillows, Steve how the hell did you manage to get a bruise on your ear?!”

The sudden gasp behind me pretty much answered the question for me, it’s safe to say barney boy is in trouble…for the first in my life Bucky looks pretty f**king terrified of me, perfect. Slowly I started inching towards him, the glare I was sending him would probably make a demon cry for his mum…so yeah imma go kill the boy. I didn’t even have to say anything, he just started runnin’, “IT’S NOT MY FAULT HE STOLE MY FR**KING PUDDIN’ AND THE PUNK KNOWS I LOVE MY PUDDIN!’” YEP DEFINITELY KILLIN’ HIM “HE IS A SMALL AND GENTLE BOY HOW IN THE NAME OF HELL CAN YOU EVEN THINK OF LAYIN’ A HAND ON ‘IM?!” god this sounds like a bleeding soap opera.

At this point I wouldn’t be surprised of someone called the cops on us, all everyone woulda seen was a big lad runnin’ for his life as a small lass tried to murder him while a smaller lad ran after the pair yellin’ for em to quit it. Now that I think about, that’s actually hilarious. Wait, where was I? ah yes the murdering of one James Barnes…okay that is not a normal sentence I am aware. “HE.STOLE.MY.PUDDIN’! THAT A CRIME WORTHY OF DEATH!” oh for f**ksake “HOW THE HELL DO YA KNOW IT WAS HIM?! DID YOU NOT THINK IT COULDA BE BECCA?!” I think he made a sudden realisation, cause the dumbass stopped running and BOOM I was on the freakin’ floor. Again. We both groaned, mine was mostly in annoyance more than anything, but seriously the bloody floor is quickly becoming me best mate! “…. It just dawned on me that that could be a possibility…” if my neck twisted any quicker I’m 100% sure that I’d end up doin’ that weird owl thing “Oh now you realise?! Ya gonna say sorry to Steve or not?” a few seconds of silence gave me my answer. “Don’t give me that look y/n! I ain’t doing s**t till I’ve got some evidence so he’s still under my list of suspects!” oh my Jesus Christ this is gonna be the day I get arrested for murder isn’t it?

“Barnaby…you have exactly five seconds to run for your life so I highly recommend you get your affairs in order and kiss ya ass goodbye” oh hey look at that I didn’t yell at him! Well done me I’m so proud! “could you two quit trying to kill each other for 5 minutes?! We’re already late enough as is it and I ain’t explainin’ to the teacher why Buck’s outta it on the floor!” my f**kin god Steve just yelled! At me! why do I never have a camera when this s**t happens? “Jeez, alright I’ll murder him later, calm your damn t*ts Rogers” and cue the sound of barely contained frustration in 3,2,1….

“I’m beginning to get the feelin’ that you don’t like me y/n” oh really? I wonder what gave that away “wow you catch on quickly don’t ya Barnaby?” by the looks of things I’m really doing wonders for his ego, buck’s head looks like it’s gotten smaller so the risk of him turning into a hot air balloon’s gone down. The feeling of a pair of eyes glaring at the back of my head once again reminded me that the blonde boy was quickly getting tired of our crap, my worst fears were confirmed once I met Steve’s surprisingly intimidating glare…how he manages to be both adorable and beyond f**king terrifying is a mystery to me. “Okay I’m comin’ just stop staring at me like I just murdered your kitten!” and the little s**t has the nerve to smirk and look pleased with himself, ugh he’s been hanging ‘round me and Bucky too long that’s for sure.

“Ya know Buck and you are gonna be the death of me” right do I be offended or pleased with that statement? “actually, if anything it’s gonna be the pair of you that send me to an early grave cause god knows the both of ya don’t know how to stay outta trouble” two muffled sounds of protest came from my left and from behind me, “what’s that supposed to mean?!” once again the point has been missed “do you really wanna know the answer to that? I’ve got my report and presentation ready on how you two are a pair of numpties”.

Maybe that was a tad harsh…okay wait never mind it seems I’ve learned how to fly again with the assistance of one James Buchannan Barnes. “this is coming from the girl who can’t walk five feet without fallin’ over somethin’?” as much as I hate to admit it the walking embodiment of frustration and annoyance has a point “what you call fallin’ I call floor hugs, now how about you pUT ME DOWN FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!” wait when did Steve walk off? See this is what happens when an overgrown ape demands attention. I don’t even have to look at Buck to know he’s givin’ me that look that says, “what the hell?” and “I’m not surprised by this” at the same time, “Nah I don’t think that’s gonna happen doll” the temptation to kick ‘im where the sun doesn’t shine is too much to bare for me at this point. “And you wonder why I love Steve more that you” Buck’s face kinda looked like someone just shoved a whole lemon in his mouth, I’m almost certain that he woulda dropped me on my ass if it wasn’t for the fact that Steve came over and dragged us both through the gates of hell.

This is gonna be so much fun!……said no-one ever.

Okay…maybe it didn’t suck as much a thought it did, hopefully my skills as a writer will come back for the next couple of chapters XD Thanks for reading ! :)

Rose xxx

#winter soldier x reader #winter soldier #captain america x reader #captain america #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers #mcu #fanfic #reader #reader insert #sebastian stan #sebastian stan x reader

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beck-a-leck · 3 years

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Fanfic Writer 20 Questions

Tagged by @thychesters Thanks Kate!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

56 on my main page, plus 5 others that are secret (aka Anonymous and don't show up in the count)

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

772,412

3. How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

~10, I have a lot of sub-fandoms as part of a larger fandom. Including but not limited to: Star Wars, Story of Seasons/Harvest Moon, Rune Factory, MCU, and many moons ago Voltron, Transformers, and Harry Potter.

4. What are your top 5 fics by Kudos?

[Redacted Anonymous fic] at 1218

Aggressive Negotiations at 312

Wells of Silence at 287

[Redacted Anonymous fic] at 280

Weekend Guests at 209

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I do! Or at the very least, I try to respond to as many comments as I can. I love being able to strike up conversation with my readers, and wallow in angst with them for a while. At the very least, I like letting them know I appreciate their feedback.

6. What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

Hmmm... that's probably the fic where I gave Anakin Skywalker an almost happy ending; twins, husband, you know the drill. And then I violently took pretty much all of that away. Killed Obi-Wan, killed the twins, left her with a heaping pile of survivor's guilt. That's probably my angiestiest fic.

But also, I write rather a lot of angst, so...

There's also the one where I gave a child 23 older sisters, and then had them slowly and painfully die off, leaving her alone as the sole survivor. (Star Wars)

And there's the one where I detailed how an 8 year old accidentally killed his brother, thus screwing up everything so badly, the whole timeline had to be erased. (Loki)

And, well, Wells of Silence IS a canon compliant AU. And we all know how Revenge of the Sith ends.

Writing angst is fun okay!

7. Do you write crossovers?

Not really, no. Usually only when I'm messing around and being goofy, or if I'm combining a lot of sub-fandoms from a larger fandom group. But I don't really count those as true crossovers.

8. Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Nothing specific comes to mind. I'm pretty sure years ago (and I mean like well over a decade at this point) I got trolled/hate on a fic by someone who was out to attack me specifically. I remember deleting the fic, and beginning to distance myself from the fandom. but obviously it didn't stop me from writing so... jokes on them. 😂

Otherwise, more recently I can only think of instances where people have used my fic comments as an excuse to vent about canon things they hate thinking they'll find a sympathetic ear, or got 5+ chapters into a long fic before saying 'it feels unrealistic that this character would do these things' to which I'm pretty sure I just shrug and don't respond.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I don't really write fanfic smut, no. It's not really my thing, and I'm happy cutting things off at an M/PG-13 rating for sexy times.

That being said, I have written non-fanfic smut before. No I'll never share it. It is well and truly laughably terrible.

10. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

To my knowledge, no I haven't.

11. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope

12. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Many, many, many years ago @jessi-08 and I co-wrote and absolute crack fic for Jak and Daxter. It was deliriously fun times. But in a more ""serious"" capacity, no I have not.

13. What's your all-time favorite ship?

Nobody? I guess?? I'm not much of a shipper, really. I enjoy reading and writing ship-content, but I've never really felt devoted to any single ship in any fandom. I'm a multi-shipper? Omni-shipper? Basically, if the fandom can bring its A-game to a ship, I'll probably quite enjoy it.

14. What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

I mean, there are a couple dozen unfinished WIPs in my writing folder that I keep around with the intention of maybe finishing them, but deep down I never will. But also, none of those are posted.

Thinking of where I am and how my fandom interests have shifted, I'm probably never gonna finish Weekend Guests. And I stubbornly refuse to admit that Dust and Ashes is dead, but also, I haven't touched it in years, and kinda forgot what I wanted to include in the story. 😬

15. What are your writing strengths?

Oh gosh... (what is this question? I can't say nice things about myself)

I guess I would say my scene setting. I love spelling out descriptions and providing the sensory experience when I can in the scenery. Otherwise, probably my ability to sink my angst claws into people and hurt their feelings with words about fictional characters while I torture them worse than canon does (usually)

16. What are your writing weaknesses?

Sticking to a goddamn regular posting schedule. I try not to get too wrapped up in writing regularly, so as to not punish myself for doing (or not doing) something that's supposed to be fun and relaxing for me. but damn I look at those WIPs that haven't been updated in months and I can't help but feel guilty.

Also, tied in with the above, starting too many projects before finishing up something else.

Also action scenes. and romance.

17. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in another language?

It can work, I think, if it's done well. But usually, it's not done well, and it just feels clunky or tossed in for "spice." But like... pet names/nicknames in a native tongue, I am so weak for those! And it can also be a fun way to drop hints/foreshadowing, but as a bonus for the people who speak the language.

Idk, I'm not fluent enough in any language to feel like I have any definitive voice in the matter. I typically don't add other language dialogue because I don't trust google translate.

And if I'm writing for Star Wars, and it's an alien language anyways, I'm not digging that deep into the lore to construct a fictional language. That shit gets Universally Translated babey!

18. What was the first fandom you ever wrote for?

Jak and Daxter my beloved! I'll never let you go! Every five years or so, I'll spit out a new fic for you 💜

19. What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

Oh no! I can't pick favorites! Don't do this to me!

Wells of Silence still sits up in my top 5, for a number of reasons.

Another of my tops is actually one of my Anonymously posted fics, so I will not mention name or fandom, but it is very beloved.

And they've been on the forefront of my mind, so I've got a soft spot for Earth and Rebirth and Our Dear Empress

20. Who do you tag?

Hmmm, let's see. @durotoswrites, @jake-marshall, @lookforaspoopynewangle (I know kate tagged you, but consider yourself double tagged), @jessi-08, and... I have all of a sudden gone completely blank on which of my mutuals writes fic 😂😬 (i only slept for 3 hours last night. leave me alone. my brain is swiss cheese.)

As always, if you want to play along, you are more than welcome to say I tagged you!

#tag games #becky writes things #writing #fanfiction #yes. I see the irony in the fact that my most popular fic and one of my faves is a Secret Fic #No I will not share it

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lambourngb · 4 years

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Get me out of here - places to go when canon is complicated

It’s Day 3, time to celebrate those stories that I turn to when I can’t deal with canon, or when I don’t have the emotional energy to untangle all the emotions I have for what’s going on in canon. Alternative universes, the safe harbor for us. Below are a mix of rewrites of canon, remixes of canon, or out right not even set in Roswell- to fill every type distance you want from canon- from near to far.

The first story I’m reccing is a long one,- so pardon the very long review below.

my love is a life taker by @jocarthage (267,600) So one day, Jessi popped into discord to share a dream she had about timetravel and being able to save yourself in the past basically, particularly Alex getting to give his baby-self a hug, and we all went, “holy shit that’s a cool fic idea please write it!” and really reality sucks right now with quarantine and whatnot, so what better thing to do than follow a WIP? I can’t tell you how badly I needed to something to look forward to as I was staring down a milestone birthday with all my plans in tatters, and this story filled the void.

Okay- now about the actual story itself, the world building about time travel in this is incredible but easy to absorb. Jessi dumps you straight into the action in chapter 1 with Alex, at 28, assassinating an Iraqi intelligence agent in 2009 that averts a bomb that was planned on US forces. You learn so much about both the story-universe and Alex here- one, that even dressed in mask and killing someone, Alex is kind and uses morphine as an overdose and has arranged for his victim’s family to be compensated, you learn that time agents can only visit places they themselves have visited during that time, and Jesse Manes had dragged his son, who was ‘time aware’ to every place of war and ruin on the planet before he was 18 and that, Alex’s victim, even as he’s dying, recognizes what a shit childhood Alex had but that Alex doesn’t.

The next part is where Alex’s time crystal malfunctions, instead of returning him to 2018, it takes him to 1998 where an 8 year old Michael is getting beaten by his foster dad and Alex, out of his time line mysteriously, visible to only Michael, saves him, but only temporarily. We all know with abusers, until you’re out of the house, it’s just a matter of time before the next beating. However, with one act, Alex at 28 starts putting into action (even though he doesn’t recognize it at the time) the steps to save his own life as he works to save Michael from his childhood. Each mission, each jump through time, Alex meets Michael, always a year apart and only for 1000 seconds, or almost 17 minutes. Jessi takes you through some of the darkest points of US foreign policy, only as Alex takes control of his life, he also starts to change the missions, and change the world. The details of places, people, food, etc are authentic from the author’s experience, if you don’t click on the links at the end of the chapters and disappear down google-rabbit holes about the events in history, well- you’re made of stronger stuff than I am. There are lots of heavy subjects discussed, but there’s always care and honesty behind the intent. The way Michael grows, the way Alex grows, and of course the journey to the present time when they could be together? It’s like pining on steroids but it’s so wonderful. I wish I could pull out one thing that I loved in particular in this story- but it’s impossible, only to say that I love that I could disappear completely within the confines of ‘my love is a life taker’ knowing that I would be kept safe by the author, that goodness prevails.

 when I’m oceans away by @neapeaikea (28,000) this is a post-2008 shed canon-divergent AU where Alex Manes, after the best/worst night of his life bolts from Roswell and leaves Michael behind. 10 years later, on the hunt for a child conceived at Caulfield, Michael walks into a youth home in California and finds Alex. A few things, I love that this author writes an Alex who didn’t join the Air Force but still lost a leg, I don’t really enjoy disability erasure in modern AUs (I’m better at looking past that in historical or sci fi aus) . It’s pretty clear after five minutes that the connection between the two men is still there and strong despite anger, secrets and guilt. The teasing and flirting between them is great but so is the acceptance of baring their vulnerabilities. I loved the care they take with each other, and the tie in to an alien child is just so perfect.

Crucibles (series) @ninswhimsy (9,000)- I’m cheating and naming both here, but obviously nin had her finger on the pulse of fandom, by writing crusade-set queer stories before The Old Guard ever boomed into a fandom from the movie. I was lucky enough to trade DMs over the ideas of holiness and the body, and how Alex would have treated himself, certain of his doomed soul, and how Michael would have responded in turn. It’s no secret I love everything Nin writes, but this series stuck in my mind. I will be drifting off to sleep, and think about Alex walking through the ancient city of Aleppo, ready to be done with his burden and Michael there with soft palms and scented oil, and boom! I reach for my kindle to re-read it.

no regrets if we walk this new road by @andrea-lyn (97,000) This author has written so many amazing AUs, some quite far away from canon events like her Mummy AU or her Avengers AU, but I have to say, I have a very soft-spot for this rewrite of season 1 for a lot of reasons. I mean, it’s 2020, so my appetite for Cop!Max is definitely at an all-time low, so the idea of exchanging his job with Kyle’s was extremely appealing. At least Kyle is a POC holding the badge, not a white man like our canon. Anyway, politics aside, this story is special to me for the scorching good Isobel/Kyle relationship that develops, the way Isobel sharpens herself into a lawyer (not an event planner) and how Michael rounds his own edges off in turn by becoming a teacher (and being secretly married). Each deviation from canon made complete sense once you alter the way Rosa’s death affects the pod squad, and how they covered it up ripples out toward Liz, Kyle, etc.

 Layer on layer, down on down by @dotsayers (9,440) I love sci-fi tropes, especially time-loops, but they are incredibly hard to write (I know, I abandoned mine a while ago) so this story stands out because of just how well done the execution is and also the angst. Michael in a time loop about Caulfield, like how great/agonizing is that? The plot is so good, how it ties into Caulfield and why it happens in the first place, like wow. The care, and the hurt, and the fatigue that Michael has in this story, oh you just want to wrap him in a blanket. There’s a tiny throwaway line about how one of the first things Michael learned to do in foster care was to make himself heavy and unmovable- and you instantly picture kid!Michael not wanting to be removed from a house - like my heart broke! The structure of the story, with the background of his just how much he loves Alex but how badly it hurts to see him die, really makes this study of 1x12 special. Along with all the angst, there’s tiny gallows humor lines, so am I weird, that I laughed through a couple of these scenes even as Michael kept dying?

Petty pace by @aewriting (11,600) Aewriting has a couple of stellar AUs, so trying to pick just one was difficult, but I rather feel this story is sadly underappreciated it (mind the tags). It was a remix of @iwontbeyourmedicine ‘s fantastic ‘Freaky Friday’, where the humans and aliens swap roles. Alex in the role of Michael basically was something I had never pictured until Ly wrote that story, and now feel utterly changed by it, especially with this backstory- the idea of Jesse Manes bringing a foster child home? Incredibly well done because there’s an off the charts level of menace in this story. The way Jesse watches Alex, who at first mistakes it for how a pedophile might size up a victim, but then catches on quickly that it’s so much worse in a lot of ways. And Alex is such a loner in the beginning, even as he reconnects with his pod siblings Liz and Maria, he’s still planning on keeping his head down and leaving Roswell far behind. Like freedom is literally the only thing he can conceive of for himself, no real dreams outside of that until Michael slips under his defenses. I probably could have saved this story for angst day- because the second half of the story, if you don’t sob while you read it, then I dunno. It’s helpful to read Ly’s story right afterward as a reminder that things do get better for Alex ten years later. In a lot of ways this story is sadder than canon (though there’s no murder of Rosa/4th alien), I’m comforted that at least Alex has Liz in the aftermath, alike in heartache in a way that Michael didn’t have because of the pact he and Max made about Isobel in canon.

Unexpected tidings by @bestillmyslashyheart (24,800) Another rewrite of canon, that explores a couple of very interesting questions, like what would it look like if Michael never made it back to Roswell as a kid but met Alex by chance in 2008? Imagine the cornerstone of the Lost Decade love affair revolving around the mundane questions of a long distance relationship that wasn’t built on the pain of the shed or Rosa’s death? Marlo writes an amazing take on this, that is both real and deep with the normal couple problems, before introducing that spanner in the works of oh yeah, aliens are real. With Michael on the east coast, and Alex finishing off his service in Roswell, Project Shepherd still entangles Alex with Liz bringing him in on the secret in hopes that with his hacker skills he can track down the third alien child that Max and Iz remember so they can warn him. As interesting as the current plot was, I found myself absolutely revitted the slow piecemeal reveals that Marlo doled out about Alex and Michael’s relationship over time. (I also while rereading this recently got very nostaglic for season 1 Alex who didn’t trust Jesse as far as he could toss him.)

Don’t Punish Me For What I Feel by @winged-fool (3,600) Tarsus IV AU - another wonderful author with a catalog of great AUs, both sci-fi and dark, and honestly it was difficult to narrow it down to one. This story, well in 2009 I was a hard core Trek movie fan, so when I saw a trek-fusion story appear, I knew I would love it just on that basis. The thing is, this gave me Michael as the Captain, a surprisingly rare role for these space fusions, even though genius level repeat offender Jim Kirk and genius level repeat offender Michael Guerin seems pretty married in my mind as a connection. As a Tarsus-like story, all the tags are well earned by the story that Alex finally shares with Michael. It hit on so many levels, the hurt/comfort level for sure, but also to have a story where Michael is this stalwart protector of Alex was really nice to find.

this isn’t the ‘holiday best friends championship’ by @usbournejez (6,090) alright to leave this on a lighter note, my final AU rec is this masterpiece by Kieran that was part of Malex Secret Santa gift fics- and what a gift it was to all of us! The way she writes established Malex is first-rate, because she always includes their canon-levels of snark/sharpness but it’s never directed at each other and that’s something I love. Here we have Alex, where we learn in just a few short lines, is a huge control freak but has the extremely big emotional handicap, and that’s his love/fondness/deserve to caretake Michael. Emotional cactus Alex who is soft for Michael? Love it. There are small drops of angsty backstory peppered in this, but really that just fuels just how sweet and wonderful the main theme of the story- which is Alex might hate the whole world at large, he loves, protects and worships Michael (and vice versa). As someone who can bake cookies, but that’s about it, I was still enthralled with the baking details and this story has never failed to encourage me to eat dessert before dinner basically.

#rnmcreate2020 #malex fic #roswell new mexico #malex fic rec #malex #MALEX FEELS #michael guerin #alex manes #fandom positivity #worship our great authors in this fandom #can we pretend it's Wednesday?#a day late and a dollar short #working on today's now!

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mertronus · 3 years

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Secret Mission - Chapter 8 (Epilogue)

A/N: Thank you so much to everyone who read and gave feedback on my first fic, I appreciate you all so much and now truly know the power of commenting on others fics when I read them. (I tended to usually leave a review but now more than ever I definitely will! Your reviews really lit up my little heart!)

Here's the conclusion, tie up some loose ends...and let's not forget, Hermione had a secret of her own didn't she?

****

"So," Hermione said softly, "Harry tracked down the two witnesses who heard McLaggen?" She was lying in Ron's childhood bed with him, his orange Chudley Canons blanket draped haphazardly over their glistening bare bodies as she listened to him recount the events of the morning. They were entwined in an intimate post-coital embraced as her delicate, ink-stained fingers toyed wit his long, calloused fingers lazily - almost as if they were conducting a slow, mesmerizing dance in mid-air. Ron's return followed immediately by the wedding, reception and basically spending the entire day celebrating the newlyweds with family meant they did not get a moment alone until they retired to Ron's bedroom after the festivities were over.

But, they did save the actual catching up for after Hermione properly welcomed Ron home, and he showed her just how much he missed her. In the afterglow came the questions and explanations.

"Yup," Ron said enthusiastically. "I don't know how he did it, but he found them and brought them into the Ministry to speak to Robards and a member of the Wizengamot. They told them everything they heard McLaggen saying, including the way he was talking about you."

"I can't believe he said those foul things," Hermione said in disgust, clutching the blanket to her chest as if the vile man was in the room at that very moment. "It feels...violating, the way he was looking at me. So to hear what he said?" She shuddered and Ron pulled her close, kissing her temple.

"I know love," he said, his voice low. "But he can't come anywhere near you. And he won't if he knows what's good for him." Hermione leaned into her husband, grateful for the way he made her feel safe. Ron kept his arms around her as he continued recounting the events of the morning. "And the great thing is, the witch from the Wizengamot agreed that he was out of line. She seemed like a right prude witch, probably even a bit of a - what'd you call it? Feminist?" Hermione nodded. "Yeah, so she was as offended as if McLaggen said them to her! She told Robards that it was her opinion that I acted accordingly - as any doting husband should act in defense of his wife - and that I should be released immediately. Her words exactly," he chuckled. "Robards still wrote me up, as a warning, but no further action will be taken."

"Oh Ron that's wonderful!"

"I know, isn't it? It also helped that the witnesses both stated that I did not actually use my wand on McLaggen, like the bloody tosser claims I did, and that they did not see me have one drink the entire time I was in the Leaky. Harry always pulls through for me." He smiled. "We always pull through for each other, really."

"Harry is amazing. Ginny too. Your entire family." She smiled and propped herself up on her elbow hovering over him slightly. "I'm so in love with your family Ron. I've barely been with them for 24 hours and yet...I can't explain it. I feel like this is home. More so than my own home has ever felt. I love my parents, but being here...I can't explain it."

Ron raised his hand to rest on her cheek, his thumb running lightly along the corner of her lip. "You don't have to explain, I get it. And I'm so happy you feel that way." He looked at her for a moment then remembered another important piece of information that was lost in the shuffle of the day. He sat up and rested against the headboard and grinned. "Guess what else?"

Hermione sat up and faced him, holding the blanket over her chest. "What?"

"We don't have to head back to France after all."

"Oh?"

"The team from Belgium came through. They captured the last three wizards who were on the run last night. Robards will be sending word tomorrow for us all to come in for a briefing on Monday, but he got word while he was with me so I was first to know." He smiled, then looked at Hermione and frowned. "Unless...you have to go back to France, don't you?" Ron realized they never actually discussed Hermione's plans after the mission. Where she would work and what it would mean for them. He felt a knot growing in his stomach.

"Well," she started, suddenly enraptured with a loose thread in his blanket, "I actually wanted to talk to you about...staying in London."

"Really?" Ron's heart raced happily, the knot disappearing immediately.

"Yes, really. I was speaking with your brother Percy earlier today, and he mentioned quite a few openings in a couple of departments that peeked my interest at the British Ministry. He already said that between you, Harry, him and Arthur and probably even Robards and Ledwig, I could get any position I set my eye on at the Ministry. I already have the connections on top of my education and experience -"

"And your brilliance," Ron added with a smile.

Hermione blushed and rolled her eyes playfully at the compliment. "Yes, well...anyway...I had already spoke to my boss in Paris about the possibility that I may stay here. I've been helping with research from afar, and may have to travel to Paris soon to tie up a few things, but as my only real task these last few months was the mission with your team," she shrugged and looked back up at Ron, "I can pretty much make a clean break."

"So...you'll stay here - WE'LL stay here - and you'll work in the British Ministry?"

"That's my hope?" She smiled but then her face got serious. "But as an Auror MAC, you may have more extended missions, won't you?"

Ron nodded slowly. "But, I was talking to Robards about that today, and he said we can discuss if I want to remain with the Auror MACS or make a switch. If I stay with the MACs though, and do have to leave, at least knowing that you'll be here, surrounded by my family...I'll hate to leave you but I'll feel better about it."

"Just don't go falling in love with an intern helping the team in Bulgaria or something," she joked. Ron pulled her into him, pressing her body flush against his own.

"I could never," he whispered, dotting her cheek and jaw with light kisses. "You are it for me Hermione Granger-Weasley."

"Good, because I quite like you too."

They settled back into the pillows holding each other close, then Ron cleared his throat. "So, we have some work to do Mrs. Weasley."

"What's that Auror Weasley?"

"Well, I figure step 1 is we'll need to find a home. I don't fancy shagging my wife for much longer in my childhood bedroom."

"A home? Like...a house?"

"Well, yeah. We could just get a flat in London, but that might hinder step two."

"And what is step two?"

"Step two is to put a baby in you," he growled into her neck while spreading his large hand over her bare stomach.

Hermione bit her lip and grinned, then she shook her head. "Oh Ronald. You did it again."

"Did what again?" he asked pushing up on his elbow over her with a concerned look. "What did I do?"

"You skipped step one...and went right for step two." Ron stared at her puzzled, then chuckled when he remembered that his plans were not for Ginny and Harry to know about their marriage first, but second.

Suddenly he sat all the way up, thinking about what Hermione just said. "I did wh-what now?"

Hermione sat up too, and took his hand and placed it back on her belly. "Step two...you've already done." Ron's wide eyes darted between her stomach and her own deep brown eyes. "I was feeling poorly a bit this week, so I went to St. Mungo's yesterday to confirm. I'm pregnant Ron," she whispered the last sentence.

"Y-you're...I'm gonna...we're...really?!" Hermione nodded smiling. Ron pulled Hermione onto his lap and peppered her entire face with kisses. "Oh Mione!...This is...so amazing...Merlin!...I love you...so much...so fucking much!" He continued planting kisses all over her cheeks and jaw and neck in between his professions of love as Hermione giggled in his arms. He lay her down tenderly then moved the orange blanket from over her. He touched her smooth stomach lightly and tried to imagine how it would look as the months went by, growing rounder right in front of him. He leaned in and kissed her stomach reverently. "I love you too, little one." He looked back up at Hermione and saw the tears in her eyes. "Oh love," he whispered as he straightened out to lay next to her. He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her deeply.

"I love you too Ron. So much. You insufferable prat," she teased.

"You love me because I'm an insufferable prat or in spite of?"

Hermione's laugh filled the room. "Hard to say!" She said through chuckles.

"Merlin, I love your laugh," Ron breathed out.

"Good thing you're relatively funny then!" Ron rolled his eyes and tickled her, delighted to hear the sound of her laugh once again reverberate around the room.

****

A/N: All the secrets are out! Yay! This was a really fun fic to write...so much so that I already have a few one-shot ideas that will be based on this AU so keep an eye out on FFN/AO3! I think we need to see more of Ron and Hermione's growing love in France, don't you? Or maybe I'll write the "before" story...hmmmm... We'll see! Now that I've "popped my cherry" and shared my first fic (and received so much love!) there's definitely more to come! I'm working on a massive one right now that I'll start to get out to you all shortly, and another completed fic I'm sitting on. So, until next time...Mertronus OUT 3

#Ron Weasley #auror ron weasley #ron and hermione #ROMIONE #romione fanfic #hermione granger #au harry potter

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maybankiara · 4 years

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PHONE SWAP (DREW STARKEY)

10: BAD DAY, HUH?

summary: Addie Mallory is just your average economics student when she meets Drew Starkey at her local Target in Atlanta. This is where the story is supposed to end – a short meeting and a picture to go – except Drew accidentally leaves with the wrong phone, and the story begins, instead.

w/c: 3k

a/n: ah. the bittersweet taste of our own flaws. -- probably addie in this chapter tbh. basically marianne being very british and making addie Question Everything, as best friends do

read on wattpad

previous part | series masterlist

Virgin Mary | 3:47pm so the gang is planning a night out this week, you free saturday?

Me | 5:07pm why this saturday? Me | 5:07pm is it someone’s birthday?? Me | 5:07pm pls say no

Virgin Mary | 5:08pm Tom’s is in two weeks and you better not forget that

Me | 5:08pm ffs marianne i won’t

Virgin Mary | 5:09pm you better not bitch I need your help with the present Virgin Mary | 5:09pm can’t give my boy anything less than perfection

Me | 5:10pm wow what a way to not put pressure in your about-to-burst-from-stress friend

Virgin Mary | 5:11pm you mean my overdramatic friend? Virgin Mary | 5:11pm get your hole and you’ll be fine

Me | 5:11pm MARIANNE

Virgin Mary | 5:12pm BITCH WHAT Virgin Mary | 5:12pm you need to shag Virgin Mary | 5:12pm when’s the last time you got your hole

Me | 5:13pm I’m busy okay i don’t want a boyfriend rn

Virgin Mary | 5:14pm so that’s totally why I’ve been hearing about Holden for the past three months 👀

Me | 5:15pm you do realise we work at the same place right Me | 5:15pm i can’t just hook up with a guy i have to see every day for at least 8 hours

Virgin Mary | 5:16pm fucking hell you’re a tuff nut

Me | 5:17pm go make me some tea pls Me | 5:17pm I’m home in 20 and I’ve got some late emails

Virgin Mary | 5:17pm whatever bitch Virgin Mary | 5:18pm you’re a freaking workaholic Virgin Mary | 5:18pm shag Holden

Me | 5:19pm shut up Me | 5:19pm ur blocked ❤

Virgin Mary | 5:20pm so are you free on saturday or not? Virgin Mary | 5:33pm ur cancelled❤

◇

The music coming from their apartment is loud enough that Addie hears it as she walks up the staircase. She can’t distinguish the song, but the beat’s there, and she’s either imagining Marianne singing along, or it’s actually happening. One is just as likely as the other.

It gets louder when Addie walks through the door, and she figures it’s safe to assume it’s her friend rather than her imagination. The door closes behind her, sound swallowed by whatever rock song Marianne is blasting through the speaker – this is what Addie is used to.

She leaves her purse on the drawer at the side of the hallway, one that’s filled with trinkets they’ve got nowhere else to put, and she hangs the raincoat right next to it. Her shoes are the next to come off – the loss of the three inches that the burgundy platforms come with comes as soon as she steps out of them. Her feet are grounding her on the floor, now, and a moment’s break is all she gives herself. It’s peace after a tedious day of relentless work; it’s the calm from the scent of cinnamon candles, Earl Grey tea, and the dish Marianne is making that smells very Italian – this feels like home.

Addie makes her way to the kitchen. Her roommate is singing her heart out to music coming from the speaker on the round table, stirring whatever’s in the pot in front of her. Marianne doesn’t notice her come in, so Addie walks over to the speaker and tunes it down, low enough for them to talk.

‘Honey, I’m home!’

Marianne turns around with a big smile on her face. Her ginger hair is pulled into a high ponytail, loose from what Addie assumes must’ve been a kitchen concert. This is paired with sweats and a loose crop top, and Marianne’s demeanour is enough to tell her she’s ready to tackle the weekend ahead of them.

‘Honey, welcome home’’ She points behind Addie. ‘There’s your tea. I’m making lasagna and it’ll be ready in about half an hour.’

‘Shit, I've actually been craving that today.'

The girl goes back to stirring the pot, swaying her hips to the tune of the music. ‘Sixth sense, Addie. Bruce Willis had it right.’

‘I told you that movie creeps me out!’

‘It’s a masterpiece and you’re a pussy.’

Instead of a reply, Addie huffs with an eye roll, taking a sip from the cup. It’s midnight blue with a quote from one of the books Marianne likes, imported straight from the British Isles. The colour is faded on the holding part of the mug, but it remains the girl’s favourite mug despite a variety of prettier, newer mugs she’s acquired over the time.

Marianne is simple. She’s got things she loves and doesn’t stray from that.

They chat for a bit, Marianne preparing the lasagna to go into the oven and Addie drinking her tea. Addie learns that the firm Marianne is interning for has gotten a new project for a family home on the outskirts of Atlanta and the interns are being allowed to try out their hand at designing it, and the firm will end up critiquing their work and possibly giving one of them the chance to have their design turned into reality.

It’s an exciting thing – the most Marianne has gotten in the past three months of working there.

The lasagna is put into the oven and Addie announces her shower time, and promises Marianne she better tell her about her day after she scrubbed off all that reminds her of the office. Taking her contact lenses out and getting into the shower after a long day is the one feeling Addie cherishes more than just the arrival home in itself. Her showers are long, with steam rising and fogging up the blurred glass sides of the shower and the mirror in the bathroom.

When she gets out of the bathroom, she’s wearing an outfit that mirrors her roommate’s. Her hair’s wet and wrapped into an old T-shirt, basking in a curl-defining product she got the other day. She’s got a facemask on, too, and Marianne sighs at the sight of it.

‘Bad day, huh?’

Addie walks up to the counter beside the oven, taking out some cutlery and begins to set the table. ‘I envy you. All your bosses are so self-absorbed that they don’t even notice you guys. Mine are self-absorbed and narcissistic, so we get all the work nobody can be fucked with.’

Marianne taps on the table with the fork she’s just been given. ‘No swearing, missy.’

The brunette raises an eyebrow, trying to figure out if her roommate is joking. Then she remembers her resolution from a few days ago -- “I will swear less because I’m not a fucking sailor.” “That’s a quarter in the jar, Miss.”

‘Whatever,’ mutters Addie. She places the last of the dishes on the table and plops into the chair across from her roommate, resting her head in her hands. ‘I’m so tired of Harrington. The divorce isn’t going well because his ex has actually got a brain, which he hadn’t anticipated, and now he’s literally just throwing the worst shit at us. And to complete it, Patty is just being her regular cruel self.’

‘That’s horrible.’ Marianne scrunches her nose. ‘That’s also three quarters now.’

‘I’m allowed to say shit!’

‘Well, you’re the one who decided to swear less.’

‘Saying shit isn’t swearing. It’s basically a normal word.’

The look Marianne gives her is full of friendly scorn. Addie sighs and fishes three quarters out of her wallet that’s on the table—she can’t believe saying “shit” alone cost her two quarters—and throws them into the jar that's on the part of the table closest to the wall. There’s hardly anything in it, but Addie reckons that’s more because of the fact that she’s hardly both home and awake anymore, as opposed to her not swearing a lot.

Marianne walks over to the oven, checking the lasagna. She pulls the door open and hot air fills the small space, alongside the smell of a beautifully done Italian dish – or Addie is just really hungry.

‘Patty made Holden and I work on a budget plan for some Grubson’s subdivision upstate. We did budgeting. He majored in finance and I majored in economics and we’re doing damn accounting.’

‘You’re interning for a law firm,’ notes Marianne, putting oven mittens on. ‘You shouldn’t expect to do exactly what you want to do.’

Addie’s lip curls into a bitter grin. Her friend is right, and she knows it and she hates that this is what her career has come to -- wasting her actual talents because the industry is shitty as it is. She’s got to put in triple the effort her white male colleagues do, and even then, her brilliance is hardly registered.

The lasagna is on the table. Marianne gives each of them a piece and Addie fills their glasses with some Coca Cola-ripoff they got at Tesco. The music from the speaker changes to something more dinner-appropriate.

‘This looks delicious, Marianne.’

‘It better be. Took me nearly three damn hours.’

Both girls blow on their slice before taking it, and both of them still end up having to half-blow through the food while it’s in their mouths, bursting into laughter as they watch one another struggle.

‘I don’t know what’s your excuse,’ says Addie, having finally swallowed the piece, ‘but mine is that I’m absolutely starving.’

Marianne pretends to chuck some food at her. ‘My excuse is that I invested a lot of time in this.’

‘Fair. It’s amazing.’

At this, the girl beams with happiness, and Addie can’t hold back a smile even as she struggles through the heat of another piece, her stomach grumbling.

‘Anyway, it’s shit. It got so bad today that I ended up spending nearly all of my time with Holden— No, hush, I’m not having it— Seriously, Marianne, we’re literally work colleagues!’ Addie sighs in exasperation, one finger raised in the last effort at getting her friend to stop nagging her about her colleague.

Marianne pouts, then gives away an innocent shrug. ‘All I’m saying is that there’s something there.’

All Addie can do is roll her eyes and focus on the plate in front of her. Her fork pierces through the lasagna with a little too much force than warranted, and the brunette concludes that’s enough to show how irritated Marianne got her.

Despite her hardest attempts at denying it, Marianne’s kind of got a point. Addie’s been at the internship for over three months now and it’s not like she has gotten close with anyone – at least, not enough to call them friends. Her career and education have always taken the priority over friends and temporary relationships, and it’s never hurt her in any way. Sure, she might’ve been lonely from time to time, but that doesn’t mean she didn’t end up with great friends, regardless.

With the internship and a Master’s degree to work on, Addie doesn’t really have time for personal connections that won’t last.

Addie shakes the thought out of her head. The lasagna bit is steaming in her mouth and Marianne rolls her eyes, but it eases the tension between the two.

‘There’s nothing between us, Marianne,’ says Addie, once her mouth isn’t burning anymore. ‘We’re a good team. Patty and Harrington noticed that we get more done than any other teams.’

‘So there’s work chemistry. You don’t have that with just about every other person, Addie. Especially not you.’

Especially not Addie, who likes to have her work done at specific times of the day, filing it in a specific way, handling her responsibility like a drop of water. Again, Marianne’s got a point.

‘Plus, he’s pretty good looking.’

The memory of showing Marianne pictures of Holden makes her chuckle. ‘You flipped out. I was scared for Tom.’

‘Please,’ scoffs Marianne, waving her hand. ‘There’s no one better than Tom. But after I spent a whole month listening to how well you’re getting on with this Holden guy, how much better it’s to work with him than other people, how much he’s helped you join the group… How else was I supposed to react when I found out that he’s a hot piece of blonde-hair blue-eyes?’

‘I just…’ Addie’s fork moves some of the lasagna around the plate. ‘I don’t know. I didn’t want you to think he’s hot.’

Marianne huffs. ‘All I’m saying is, don’t write him off.’

‘I’m not writing him off. I just don’t have the time to focus on anything romantic right now.’

‘That’s bullshit and you know it.’ Marianne finishes the last of her slice and puts her fork down, leaning back in the chair. ‘Addie, you’re the most organised person I know. You never have a problem making it to any of the things our group organises, so why do you always say you don’t have time to hang out with people from work?’

For a few moments, the only sounds in the kitchen/dining area are whatever’s coming out of the speaker, Addie’s work scratching the bottom of the plate, and her chewing.

She knows Marianne’s got a point, again. It’s starting to annoy her.

‘Things are good the way they are,’ she finally says, the admission heavy across her lips. ‘I get closer to any of them, it’ll become more difficult to point out what they’ve done wrong, or do my own work if I want to know about their day. It’s already difficult enough with Holden, and we’re just friends.’

‘That’s different. You want to shag him.’

‘I don’t—’

‘Are you seriously trying to deny the fact that you’re attracted to someone who looks like a damn nineties movie star?’

Addie grunts, burying her face in her hands. ‘Fine. He’s hot.’

There’s a pregnant pause and when she finally dares look at Marianne, the girl has a tired smile on her face. She knows this look -- a combination of I told you so and I could be your therapist, you don’t need to pay for one.

‘What.’

Marianne taps her hand, her smile widening. ‘I know your career means a lot to you, but you’ve got to loosen up. You’re going to burn out.’

‘Everybody burns out.’

‘Yeah, but you’re gonna do it at, like, thirty.’

Not dignifying this with a response, Addie rises to her feet, taking her plate and Marianne’s, then stacks the cutlery on top. She’s acutely aware of Marianne waiting for a reaction, even if she doesn’t want to give her one. Instead, she gets to washing the dishes. Running water drowns out the tension easily enough for it to slip into the back of her mind.

She hears Marianne’s chair let out a squeak a moment later. Her ginger hair appears in the corner of Addie’s eye, and she sees her put the uneaten half of the lasagna into the fridge, wrapped up in aluminium foil. When finished, Marianne rests against the counter with the small of her back.

Neither of the girls says anything. Addie is trying to ignore the gnawing feeling in the pit of her stomach that’s trying to convince her Marianne is right.

She sets the washes dishes aside, letting them air dry on the dish rack.

‘All I meant was that you could go out with them, for a change, not turn your life upside down,’ says Marianne. ‘Just think about it.’

Addie presses her lips together. ‘Okay. I’ll think about it.’

‘Great! Anyway, you need to come out with us on Saturday. Leanne spent fifteen minutes of our coffee date today just freaking out over the fact that you met Drew Starkey.’ A beat. ‘She binged Outer Banks yesterday.’

‘I can’t believe my life is finally interesting to you guys.’ Addie puts away the last of the dishes and wipes her hands with a kitchen towel, smiling. ‘All it took was meeting an actor.’

Marianne pushes herself up on the counter, grinning like a fox. ‘It’s not just that you met him, Addie. It’s been three months and you still talk.’

‘Not really. We haven’t talked in’—she counts the days in her head—‘about two weeks.’

‘Oh, so you haven’t talked since he read your essay and shared it to his hundreds of thousands of followers and said how much he liked it?’

‘Nope.’

The sigh Marianne lets out is pure exasperation. Addie walks out of the kitchen and the girl follows suit, bringing the speaker along. Both of them plop on the couch as they usually do for half an hour after dinner, before going each to their own studying sessions. Deciding to room with Marianne, who’s currently also doing an internship and a Master’s degree (in architecture), was one of the best decisions Addie has ever made.

Except for the times when Marianne is awfully nosy for a Brit – must be the French part of her.

With her legs criss-crossed and an arm draped over the back of the couch, Marianne is in her element. ‘That is not your average celebrity interaction.’

‘I know.’

‘So you’re telling me you’re not trying to get on that?’

‘On what?’ asks Addie, feeling her irritation levels steadily rising again. ‘Jesus, Marianne. I’m not trying to get with every guy who’s good-looking and nice to me. We share some opinions on social media and whatnot, he agreed with them. It’s not that big of a deal.’

‘So you’re saying you wouldn’t shag him if you had the chance?’

Addie looks away. Her cheeks are hot and body is on fire, and she’s had more than enough of Marianne’s attitude today, and that’s on top of already having had a pretty fucking shitty day in the first place.

‘You can’t be ser—’

‘I don’t want to talk about this anymore.’

She grabs her phone and, absentmindedly, checks her Instagram notifications – none. The feeling in her stomach intensifies and she opens up her work group chat instead, and curses herself for hoping that maybe there’d be a specific person in her messages.

Maybe Marianne isn’t that far off.

◇

11: WELCOME TO MY LIFE

tagging. @jjmaybanksbaby @taiter-tots @sacredto @snkkat @drewswannabegirl @yeslifeofateen @rudypnkw @stfukie @x-lulu @sacredto @drewstarkey @butgilinsky @solllaris @hyperactive2411 @chasefreakinstokes @surferkie @jroseron @k-k0129 @starlightstories

#drew starkey #drew starkey fic #outer banks #obx #phone swap series

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steve0discusses · 3 years

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The Full Metal Alchemist Live Action Movie Part 8: Watch This Episode Covered in Butts be the Only One Not Flagged by Tumblr

Gonna be risky business and not only upload all of these caps the way I screenshot them--which has just SO MANY poorly CGI’d butts but also gonna do it on the Tumblr Drafts folder, which I have been assured works now.

I’m so worried about so many things, but considering all the fears I have about like...everything else in the world right now...I guess I’ll take a risk on tumblr.

Edit: I cannot believe that I had 8ish episodes of Kaiba’s tall dueling tower get flagged but not this movie. I just....wow I cannot.

So anyway, last we left off, General Hakuro stepped in and was like “Hi guys, you like my wily plans that no one in their right mind would have ever guessed???”

Yo remember this part of the anime? Where the bodies drop from the ceiling and it’s a hunk out of the final arc--it’s here. In this movie. This movie that can’t possibly afford to do that. Lets get some CGI animated bodies in here ASAP.

(see some texture regrets under the cut)

It’s like a Monet, as the Mean Girls say, because far away and shrinked to 500 pixels this looks kinda neat. They sort of look more like those slime ball that grow in the back of your throat rather than human bodies, but they still look pretty gross hanging up there.

But then.....we zoom in. Remember again that this was full screen on my computer, and at one point was on a freakin movie screen. This level of 3d...was on a movie theater screen.

The mind boggles. The mind boggles!

Like as you know, I am an artist, and I’ve dabbled in...basically everything in my pursuit to make a dollar...and I have taken about 2 years of classes in 3D art with Maya and all those. I’m not thaaat great at it--I’m much more an illustrator/painter--but I feel like I have that reference point. Can I just say--the model is...fine...you can do a lot with layers of bump maps so you don’t need a truly detailed model (not like they did that, because they didn’t do that, but I can figure that maybe they had an intention to do that and forgot?)

But, there’s no connection of the wires to bodies. They just kinda float? The bodies are also all the same shiny-ness? To the point that it looks like a copy paste? (I don’t think it is, the wires are slightly different on a few of them) There’s just not much in the way of a texture map or a bump map. It just...there’s also something missing from the skin.

Skin is actually kind of rough to render, so when I did it back in the day, I followed like a checklist to make sure I had all the layers and steps to make someone look...clammy. Some things are kinda translucent, they reflect light a different way...especially white skin like this wouldn’t be just...white like putty. Dunno if you ever saw a white person, but we got so many veins...there was so much potential to make something really gross and fleshy.

Instead we got silly putty. It’s fine. I’m fine.

So General Hakuro decides to just...kill everyone right now.

This makes no sense to me.

That means that the whole thing of Lust killing Hughes was completely unrelated to General Hakuro. All Hakuro needed was Shou Tucker, who has been in prison for...I assume months since Ed shipped him off. And Shou was only released today? Just now? Just now when Hughes was shot?

So this all just happened at the same time by accident?

I mean the General sent us to the wrong lab initially, so he didn’t actually want us to be here, and now that we are here, he’s going to set off an entire army as a reaction to three people walking in and going “oops”?

So, lets get a look at our army.

Oh it was so disappointing, this reveal. Not just the eyeball that has a bounce light coming from below the top lip there (how did that even happen???) but also when it opened it’s mouth, it had a flat animation of skin breaking--it wasn’t actually rendered 3d skin, it was like a jpg wrapped around it or something (or at least that was the illusion I got. That is fine for a video game or a TV show, but this is a movie. This is shot so that it can be displayed in a size bigger than your own house.

What happened to the animation team on this one? Not saying I can do better, cuz no, I can’t, that 3d chapter in my life was a while back, but I’m just one guy. This was an entire animation studio and they just...didn’t render 3d face ripping (which is their entire job, to work in 3d) and then they kinda just turned on the stock physics dynamics and dropped em instead of animating them.

The way they fell was like fish from a bucket--the same amount of speed, too. they all ragdolled like a 3D shooter, their rigs just hanging on for dear life (and yes, you could see the deforming happen on the joints of these models.) I’m fine with having a computer program render something out with a physics engine...but there is a balance.

You do have to still go in there and finangle it back because...real life is hella stupid. Real physics? So stupid. It was hilarious how nonthreatening it was, too because they’re like...the size of shrimps in that zoom out image. The scale is just so wild!

It was like one bored guy in a sound booth and they multiplied his voice three times. Golden. Absolutely golden.

So these guys stride over, all of them with the same amount of speed (leading me to think it was probably a recorded walk cycle they all share with slight alterations between all of em) and they kinda just...pile on eachother in a weird way.

I will give them this: I was happy to see something that wasn’t physics or procedural. They mo-capped and animated that part for sure. It had the touch of an artist’s hand. It was also a very funny way for Hakuro to die because this guy was on screen for like 5 minutes, and maybe 7 minutes of this whole movie.

Youknow...I think it really says a lot about your nude 3d models if they’re not disturbingly human enough to trigger the tumblr filter, youknow?

Anyway, Envy looks on.

And then Gluttony saves the city.

Meanwhile, they decide to bust out the fire effects and Mustang becomes the most useful person in this entire movie. Like honestly this movie was poorly named, because it should have just been “Mustang saves the FullMetal Alchemist’s Entire Ass.”

The next part seems like I forgot a cap, or maybe missed something. I swear to you, I did not.

First off, Al becomes fullmetal and makes this happen without an alchemy circle. The show doesn’t really care to talk about that though, it’s just a thing he can do now, and you’d only notice it if you were writing a Tumblr post about it.

I swear to you, Winry is just inside of Al and there is no explanation.

There is no explanation for this.

She was on the couch...why is she not on the couch? What?

And then when you think they might have a moment, Ed’s like.

Damn.

For reals what the hell was that entire scene except for a way for Ed to get his arm stitched back on in like 2 minutes?

Outside, Envy and Lust are just strolling around the back-alley of this red brick building we have seen used for this entire movie.

And like...it’s so funny to me because they weren’t trying to run or hide. It makes complete sense why they got shot. This is what happens when you just...walk away when the whole military guard wants to kill you.

Now lets go see how Hawkeye is faring.

Luckily, all of the ambling bodies have decided to walk slowly through this one weird grass section between extremely long buildings.

And Hawkeye tells everyone “You have to shoot their heads off” and I want you to look at that scene and tell me how many of those bodies still have heads.

Oh, all of them. Don’t worry about it.

Kinda hard to see, but Ed shows up to give Mustang a hand, which was fully unnecessary but we’ll get to that in a bit.

This movie is such a gem.

Ed goes big brain and realizes that Envy is still burned up, and thus is about to pass on.

And whatever, I’ll take it. It’s not like the movie has told us that they are made out of 1000000 lives, for all we know, in the movie universe, they really are only 4 lives. Like half a cat. Maybe Father only killed half a cat instead of an entire city.

Yugi Muto would be so freakin proud of Envy for how often this guy gets hit square in the chest with fire balls. It’s basically every scene where Envy and Mustang share screen time.

And don’t worry, I don’t think Envy died? But they sure made it look like he did, which I’m sure everyone everywhere was really happy to see, since Envy’s death was one of the climaxes of the whole series. Like people used to make these lists of “top 10 saddest anime deaths” and how many people had Envy on there? Like everyone? People freakin love Envy and they did him so much dirty in this movie.

Again I have no explanation for Winry.

So Mustang is like, Ed, you make sure Winry doesn’t biff it in that corner, and I’ll do my actual job over here on this side. And yo, he did.

And so then that’s it, Lust is dead, and now we have a Sorcerer’s stone.

Man it looks delicious, right?

I’d eat the hell out of that.

Anyway, we only have one more update and we’re done with this movie!

I know!

I know! They only have 10-15 minutes to resolve pretty much everything, and that’s assuming that the credits don’t take up a heap of that. Hell, I might only have 3 caps next episode if that’s all credits. I honestly don’t remember.

Anyway, hope y’all take it easy this February, here is a link for people who just got here to read these FMA recaps in Chrono order.

https://steve0discusses.tumblr.com/tagged/fma/chrono

#FMA #Fullmetal Alchemist #Fullmetal Alchemist Movie #recap #photo recap #ed elric #colonel mustang #hawkeye #al elric #Winry Rockbell #so much fire #so much almost there CG

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dokidokivisual · 3 years

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Gochiusa BLOOM episode 9 impressions

Previously: 8 - 7 - 6 - 5 - 4 - 3 - 2 - 1

That’s right, the long-awaited review of episode 9 is finally here! I haven’t managed to finish it last week and kind of lost motivation since almost nobody reads these anyway, but there we go. Not sure what I’m going to do with the remaining episodes at this point, maybe I’ll combine 10 and 11 together?

The episode starts with a flashback from Chiya and Sharo’s childhood which shows the origin of Anko’s crown. The scene is “shot” in widescreen aspect ratio, a technique that I don’t remember being used before in Gochiusa anime, such as during the previous Chiya/Sharo flashback in Season 2 Episode 9.

I’d like to bring the attention to the opening shot of flowers, which are periwinkles (Vinca major). As you might know, Japanese media often uses the flower language, or hanakotoba which assigns specific meanings to various flowers. The meanings of greater periwinkle are “pleasant memories” and “childhood friends”, which seems to apply rather well here. In fact, if you see a shot of flowers in an anime, there’s a very high chance they have a relevant meaning in hanakotoba.

Of course I couldn’t help but look up chamomile as well, and its meaning seems to be “patience in the face of adversity”...

It seems that Chiya has now lost the crown, but it’s honestly surprising how it stayed on Anko all this time considering he has been carried away by crows and dropped from the sky more than once. Also, I feel like revealing the crown is lost so early in the episode deprives the viewers from being able to spot it on their own, just by seeing crownless Anko in various scenes (as has been done in the manga chapter).

In Chiya’s class there’s an election for picking the candidate from the class for the student council president position. The only two people competing are Chiya and the class president (who doesn’t have a name and referred to only as Iincho). In a surprising turn of events, Chiya gets 16 votes versus 14 votes for the prez (refer to the tally mark chart in episode 3 review), which means there are at least 30 people in the class.

Imagine losing a popularity poll to Chiya. The prez is a tragic character...

Cocoa volunteers to be Chiya’s “producer”, but Chiya calls her “First Lady” which totally means she wants to marry her. By the way, it was Cocoa who nominated Chiya for the election, which I don’t think is mentioned in the anime. In general, this particular chapter has been rearranged rather heavily for the adaptation with things happening in a completely different order, so it’s quite interesting to compare the two versions.

For example, when we see Chiya coming up with the names of various student committees, it seems like a completely natural and Chiya thing to do. It’s hard to believe that in the manga, it is Sharo who comes up with the idea of renaming all the committees. In fact this particular Chiya/Sharo tête-à-tête is not in the manga at all. However it’s an important scene to establish Sharo’s feelings towards Chiya’s presidential ambitions and she doesn’t seem too happy about them, in fact she doesn’t even congratulate Chiya.

Next we have another anime-original scene where Chiya goes to accessories store (from episode 6) to find a replacement for Anko’s crown. It should be pointed out that the design of the crown itself is not completely arbitrary. It features a moon crescent, which symbolizes night (the last character 夜 of Chiya’s name) but is also associated with Arabic world. The closest thing to Anko’s crown I could find is this heraldic crown of the King of Egypt. Anyway, this is also a reference to Chiya’s name, namely it being derived from Japanese name for 1001/Arabian Nights 千夜一夜物語 (Sen’ya Ichiya Monogatari).

Meanwhile Rize is trying to change image to be more like a college student, notices Chiya and asks to make her an adult (phrasing?). As a result, we get an appearance from Rize’s alter-ego Rose for the first time since season 1 episode 9.

The interesting thing about Rose is that despite being featured in only a small number of chapters, she gets a mention in Rize’s character blurb in Manga Time Kirara MAX until this day. It literally takes like a third of her character description!

Anyway, this scene is just a prelude for the adaptation of chapter 2 of volume 7 which is named after a Rize character song 鏡合わせのアンビバレット. In the song, Rize tries on outfits in front of a mirror and tries to convince herself that it’s still her. The illustration for this chapter also shows Rose as a mirror image of Rize.

We see Sharo looking through a bookstore window, which I think also appears in the following episode, and this is a foreshadowing that she works here too. The bookstore is named “Dreamy Books” which is seen later in the scene.

Chiya and “Rose” appear and at first Sharo doesn’t recognize Rize, and only does after Rize points a finger gun at her. Well, it’s not like there is anyone else in this town having purple hair or anything.

By the way you might notice that compared to the last episode the characters are dressed much more warmly, which reflects the fact that it’s already December. Looking back at the scene in episode 8 where Rize and Chimame cross the bridge at night, it’s quite shocking how lightly they’ve been dressed there.

Chino and Cocoa come by, and recognize Rize as Rose. It’s lampshaded that the last time they’ve seen Rose was more than a year ago, so it’s quite impressive that they still remember her, as well as her promise to visit Rabbit House (in s1e9 she only visits Ama Usa An). Rize thinks it’s a good chance to “infiltrate” Rabbit House to see what the others think of her when she’s gone.

Rize’s infiltration goes relatively smoothly until Maya and Megu barge in and immediately recognize her. Chiya manages to get them to play along in time, however Megu makes up a ridiculous backstory painting Rose as a ballet kempo practitioner who fights an evil organization.

Aoyama Blue Mountain also backs up Rose’s existence, by mentioning that she is in her literature club and also does food reviews. She gives Rize a cheat sheet which seems to parody the tendency of food reviews to describe food as “melting in your mouth” (for example wagyu beef).

Later Rize ends up having a conversation with Chino where she reveals that Rize’s been taking more days off than usual and it gets lonely without her. She has also started lazing about in the sun, just like Cocoa does, which wouldn’t have happened if Rize has been around upholding the discipline. In the anime Rize doesn’t really react to this, but in the manga she seems a bit disappointed in Chino.

This scene is a callback to the very first episode of the show, where Rize pretends she can’t easily carry these bags of coffee beans, because they’re too heavy for a “normal girl” according to Cocoa. Soon after, Rize’s cover is blown after she reacts to an intruder who is just Takahiro.

It turns out that Cocoa has already recognized it’s Rize. One thing that Cocoa and Rize have in common is that they change hairstyles a lot compared to the other characters, so it makes sense that Cocoa would not be fooled by a simple hairstyle change... or would she? Shortly after Cocoa has a realization that Rose has always been Rize, which makes her feel really stupid... until she finds that Chino is still completely in the dark about everything. Maybe Chino has propagnosia, or inability to recognize faces? Anyway, Rize is quite supportive about it and asks Chino if she’s ok if she does image change in the future.

But there’s still one more twist in this chapter, since Cocoa’s sister Mocha makes an appearance! Considering she appears in the opening, this season hasn’t really done anything with her yet. But it turns out it’s just Cocoa in a wig (why does she even have a Mocha wig???), nevertheless she successfully fools Rize and Chino for a second. Maybe the last episode of the season will have real Mocha (I’m assuming she won’t be in the Christmas arc).

And we’re back to the student council election storyline. The “sandwich” composition where one story “wraps” another seems to be used a lot this season. In this case the stories have almost zero relation to each other so I don’t know why the episode had to be structured like this.

Chiya’s election poster (aside from Cocoa’s scribbles) follows a traditional Japanese election poster design, featuring a closeup photo of a politician, her name and a slogan (which implores you to vote like a shiratama dumpling for some reason). I feel like a poster like this prioritizes the looks of a politician over their policies or whatever, but maybe there’s some sort of election law that these posters have to follow.

Cocoa and Chino also wrote letters of endorsement for Chiya, although Cocoa’s was mostly written by Aoyama and was basically a food review. Chino not only made Chiya almost explode from praise, but also presented a verbal takedown of Cocoa on the fly. Later, Chiya makes a passionate speech trying to emulate Rize, but maybe Chino should’ve written that too.

Next I’d like to point your attention to the name of the dish that Chiya made to celebrate the occasion:

Aki no sora (in the autumn sky) Todoroku oto wa (a thundering sound is) Omedetai (auspicious)

If you count the syllables, you’ll find that it is actually a haiku. and it even includes a kigo (season word, “autumn in this case”). The final line is a pun, as tai indicates the presence of taiyaki (a bean paste filled cake shaped like a bream fish) in the dish.

Another anime-original scene appears to flesh out the episode’s “moral” and show how Ama Usa is where Chiya really shines. A bunch of old ladies (who seem like they starred in a Kirara manga a long time ago) enter the teahouse to celebrate the birth of a 5th grandchild for one of them. Cocoa also helps Chiya, donning the Ama Usa uniform once again.

Chiya sprinkles gold dust on her dish, doing her best “salt bae” expression. Pure gold is inert and as such can be safely eaten. In Japan, gold leaf is even added to tea, which might explain why Chiya has it.

As everyone is about to go home, Chiya’s grandma appears through a rarely-opened sliding window and offers some manju as a treat. In the anime this is how Sharo eventually discovers the lost Chiya’s crown, which her grandma uses as a hairpin (the hairpin functionality explains how this crown doesn’t fall off Anko). Surprisingly she doesn’t appear at all in the manga chapter, and Sharo just randomly finds the crown “outside”.

By the way, the text on the manju box says “congratulations on winning the election”, which might’ve been a bit premature.

Sharo goes to return the crown back to Chiya, and Chiya repeats Cocoa’s reaction from part A, which sounds like breakup song lyrics. This dialogue wasn’t in the manga in either scene and I think it was included to somehow tie the two parts together, and make the inability to notice something obvious that was around you the whole time the unifying concept of the episode.

For Chiya the crown was the symbol of ambition, and her dream to become the director of Ama Usa An and conquer the world. Sharo has a lot of drive to work multiple jobs, but doesn’t seem to have a goal she aspires to. When she finally gets an opportunity to move up the ranks, by becoming a student council president, she declines it. Living side by side with Chiya forever (zutto issho) seems to be the extent of her ambitions. Sharo feels betrayed by Chiya being ready to “leave” her and spend more time with student council than at her own restaurant.

After the ED we see the conclusion of this conflict. Sharo sees the preparations for celebrating the winner of the election, and begrudgingly congratulates Chiya. We see Cocoa, Rize and Chino helping out, but Sharo wasn’t even invited...

But it turns out class prez was the winner, after Chiya has declined the nomination. She probably had all the posters and speeches at the ready just in case, and didn’t have to prepare at all. In the manga, this is also where she returns Sharo’s uniform that she borrowed back in episode 4.

Meanwhile Chiya and Sharo have a talk and agree that it was the best for them to decline their nominations and they should stick with what they have. Not sure if that applies to Sharo though, she wasn’t really shown to be “shining” but more like “barely getting by”. There was also another reason in the manga for Chiya to agree it was the right choice: Chiya’s classmates totally trashed her menu names, which means they probably wouldn’t like her committee names either. Most of the classmates dialogue was cut out in the anime though.

So that was episode 9 and all that’s left for this season is a 2-episode Christmas arc and the season finale. Hope you enjoyed this review and until next time!

#gochiusa #gochuumon wa usagi desu ka?#is the order a rabbit?#review

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imalifegen89 · 3 years

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A Legacy Left Behind - Chapter - 5 - The Gemmond Incident

Part 5 - Final

Stargate Command, Cheyenne Mountain - Colorado

As promised, Lieutenant Colonel Cameron Mitchell had shown up with SG-1, which had included himself, Teal'c, Vala Mal Doran, and Dr. Daniel Jackson. Sam Carter had not been available since she had been called away to the Daedalus for an urgent matter. Dr. Rodney McKay and Dr. Radek Zelenka had both shown up in her place to specifically study the two downed crafts and find a solution to free the trapped Gemmondians. SG-3, SG-8, and SG-9 had accompanied the Colonel in order to disperse around the city and help with the clean-up and whatever other tasks the citizens were in need of help with. Dr. Sandy Van Denson and Dr. Ian Carmichael along with three other medical staff had also shown up, bringing along the promised medical assistance for the traumatized Gemmondians.

Sheppard and the team had been upgraded to local celebrity levels and almost all of the people there in the city had wanted to catch a glimpse of the Tau'ri who had managed to successfully wipe out the Wraith. The locals had insisted on the feast they had somehow managed to prepare despite everything and made the SG-11 the guests of honor. The team had stayed for a few minutes, enjoyed a few local cuisines, and taken their leave in quiet relief when Mitchell and the other teams had finally shown up to take over.

..........

"Fucking hell! Hearing about all this crap in the briefing and looking at nasty photos is one thing. But this, man - this is something else." Danny's voice was equal parts awe, fear, and incredulity.

"So, this telepathic attack basically had a domino effect on these creatures. Powerful as they are when they are mentally connected to each other, it can also be a major weakness. Too bad only the ATA gene carriers have this ability," Adam Noshimuri sounded wistful. He was fascinated by the footage they were all now going through of the day's operation.

SEALs always went on ops with recording apparatus as a part of their standard kit. SG-11 had permission to keep this particular Special-Operator-trait for their operations, in keeping with the Navy standards, and it came in handy. They could always study the ops footage later to get more information and also it could be used to educate other teams whenever they went through something like this. Only a few of the team had body cams that day since they had been going to a party. But they had managed to team up to maximize the coverage and now they had mostly complete footage of the entire operation.

They had all gone for their post-Gate-Hop medical checkups once they had returned to the mountain. As promised, Colonel Mitchell had retrieved the rest of the SG-11 from the village near the jungle and they had returned to the mountain about 20 minutes later. They all had reunited in the infirmary during their medical checkups. Sheppard, Lorne, and Danny had garnered extra attention - the first two because of their dealings with the Wraith and Danny for getting partially stunned. But they had all been cleared without needing to spend the day in the infirmary once the doctors had been satisfied. They had all had early dinners in the mess hall and the two pilots had retired to the quarters since they had both been still suffering from headaches. The rest of the team had gathered in one of the smaller recreational rooms to go through the footage and get their AARs (After Action Reports) done for the debriefing the next day. They had already gone through the cam feeds from Steve, Bates, and Vega and now knew what each team had faced. They had exchanged praises, criticisms, and good-natured ribbing while watching different areas of footage with fascination. Now they were all at the part from the cam Lorne had been wearing.

"Yeah, that's the thing. These guys are rare enough as it is. When the Wraith find out about this, they’re going to start hunting them. The gene carriers are a real threat to Wraith. All they have to do is ask the Goa'uld to take care of the gene carriers while they deal with the non-gene carriers. We’re going to have to try and keep this stuff under wraps as long as we can," said Vega, after they had all finished watching the feed.

"Keep what under wraps?" asked Sheppard at the end of a huge yawn. He was leaning against the door of the rec room and was wearing a black t-shirt, loose sweats, and a pair of slippers. He still looked half asleep and Steve wondered what had made the man wake up and come looking for them.

"Ah, sleeping beauty, come take a seat. We were just talking about your horror show," said Danny, with his usual lack of tact.

They were using the TV screen in the room to watch the feeds and a few laptops and PDAs were scattered on the stool in front of them. Steve, Adam, and Kono were sitting on the long couch, Danny, Bates, and Vega had claimed sofas and Cadman was settled between Higgins' stretched-out legs on the floor. Sheppard pushed off from the door frame and walked into the room eyeing the seating arrangement. Then he huffed and went to settle on Steve's lap, who let out a quiet laugh and moved to accommodate the burden. John wriggled and shifted until he was sitting comfortably, resting sideways on Steve's chest with his head on Steve's shoulder, and let his long legs dangle off the armrest of their side of the couch. Steve wrapped his arms around the sleep-warmed body on his lap and closed his eyes. Then John looked at Danny expectantly. Danny keyed a few commands on the laptop closest to him and started the feed from Lorne's cam for John to have a look.

Steve felt him tensing up the moment John saw himself on the screen. It occurred to Steve then, that this was the first time John had seen himself going through the 'online experience.' The other time he had been alone and when he was discovered, he was already back to normal. Steve rubbed his back, offering silent comfort.

"Wow! That's... um... disturbing. My eyes - they look creepy - I look creepy..." said John. He was thoroughly disturbed at witnessing his physical transformation.

"I don't know brah, I was once involved in a raid at a meth factory. I've seen creepier-looking dudes running around, believe me," said Kono matter-of-factly from the middle of the sofa.

"And I know for a fact that you are a complete lunatic. One, because I've seen you fly and have had the misfortune to fly with you several times. Two, you are dating the other lunatic you are sitting on. So this little drama is nothing. I wasn't even that surprised," said Danny, his hand slicing away at the space in front of him, emphasizing his point. John and Steve both sent identical glares at Danny who just upped the wattage of his shit-eating grin.

John could clearly see the easy acceptance from his team of his rather weird ability, and That made it much easier for him to accept the fact himself. (He did remember how Lorne had looked during the change. Okay - he had looked like he was high on something - but not a full-on-mutant like John, though.)

"So the point we were discussing was, to keep this bit of intel from falling into the claws of the Wraith because that would lead to those fuckers declaring open-season on gene-carriers," said Bates, with a grimace. The others nodded in response.

"Dr. Carson is working on artificial gene therapy. He says his serum would have a 75% chance at activating junk DNA in a non-gene carrier to become ATA positive. I actually helped him to find some information he needed from the Alteran archives back in Antarctica. The way things are going, we are going to need him to deliver soon, so that we'll have enough people to deal with these assholes," said John thoughtfully, his mind drifting back to discussions he had with the Scottish doctor during his visits to the Defense Outpost in Antarctica.

"Yeah, and let's not forget the Snake-Heads. At least we have some sort of warning system against the Wraith. But the Goa'uld - do we even have a way of identifying them in advance?” The question was from Steve. he still had his eyes closed, enjoying the proximity to John.

"There are some medical scans that can spot them. Other than that, the Jaffa and some of the previous hosts, like Vala and Carter can sense them. Of course, the Tok'ra would know. But that's about it I think," said Cadman, remembering the facts from Daniel Jackson's lectures.

"Yeah, they've been quiet enough on earth for what, closer to two months now? But busy stirring trouble in other worlds? Whatever they are planning, we are not going to like it much when it happens. I really can do without these times of suspense, you know?" said Vega.

"I know it's tempting fate, but I do agree. By the way, did you guys hear? The word is, that the big boss is going to show up tomorrow. Probably for our briefing. He usually shows up when things are really going to get sent up the creek without paddles," informed Cadman conspiratorially.

"What big boss?" asked Sheppard at the same time Steve asked, "Where do you even hear this stuff from anyway, hah?"

"Oh, I've got my sources, Mr. Major, Mr. Lieutenant Commander," said Cadman, grinning from ear to ear.

"Awesome. Better get our paperwork and shit together then, yeah?" suggested Bates and grabbed the PDA closest to him.

Sheppard slid off the comfortable lap he was sitting on and settled on the floor between the Commander’s legs, then grabbed two PDAs - one for himself and one for Steve. They all then got busy with their respective reports on the day's events.

..........

Early next morning, Sheppard was sitting inside the Jumper helping the Air Force Lt. Colonel Samantha Carter to extract the data pertaining to their jaunt in Gemmond. He was transferring the flight records, blueprints of the Darts and Wraith Dart Carrier, all details about hull compositions, weapons, and other data, the scans and the footage the Jumper had managed to capture to Carter's PDA. When the data transfer finished, Samantha Carter went away, letting Sheppard know that they'd be called in for the debrief later on.

He knew that Kono and Steve had also prepared a comprehensible version from all the cam feeds they had on themselves during the mission as well. They had all submitted their detailed AARs to the SGC server already and were now waiting to be called to the briefing room for a Q&A session with the General and whoever else was present.

The summons came via Sergeant Harriman who came to fetch the SG-11 team leaders, Sheppard and McGarrett, into the main Briefing Room just after breakfast.

Briefing Room, SGC, Cheyenne Mountain - Colorado

Entering the Briefing Room, Sheppard experienced a feeling of déjà vu, since the atmosphere held the same intensity as his first briefing at the same place, several weeks ago.

This time there were more participants. Even in his BDUs, the bald Major General had an imposing presence. Brigadier General Jack O'Neill was sitting to his right and Lt. Colonel Cameron Mitchell was to his left. Next to O'Neill were Dr. Daniel Jackson and Lt. Colonel Samantha Carter with Teal'c sitting beside Mitchell. Dr. Rodney McKay was also present, busily typing on the laptop in front of him while munching on what looked like a blueberry muffin. Dr. Zelenka was sitting next to him trying hard to look like he had absolutely no association with McKay. SG-11 leaders had the seats on the opposite side of the big conference table, facing everyone, completing the assembly. There were two projector screens, on opposite sides, so no one had to twist their necks to see the feeds or any other data that was projected onto the screens. They also had their own PDAs or laptops with them, so they had ready access to anything they needed at any moment.

"General, you wanted to meet the trouble magnets. Well, here they are. The team leaders of SG-11." General O'Neill made an unorthodox introduction as they both entered the room and gathered in front of the conference table.

"You shouldn't complain much O'Neill, when you were the one who was bugging me for a group of special operators in your ranks. Now you've got some, and if they’re bringing extra workload for you, well, you've got no one else to blame," said General Hammond pleasantly.

"You know, it was more like Marshall's wish, come to think of it," O'Neill informed General Hammond. Colonel Marshall Sumner who was at the Earth Alpha site on an inspection, was not there to defend himself.

General Hammond shook his head in amusement, already much used to General O'Neill's eccentric ways, and turned to address SG-11." Anyway, gentlemen, it's a pleasure to finally meet you two. I have seen your personal files and the files of everyone in your team, of course, but I always like to meet trouble magnets in person, whenever I can manage. Please sit and make yourselves comfortable. We’re going to be here for a while," he informed the Major and the Lt. Commander.

"Major Sheppard, if you can please give a brief report of what took place in Gemmond?" he looked to Sheppard once they were seated.

Sheppard recounted the mission as ordered. He started from the point where they had to force the connection to Gemmond via the Jumper's DHD and detailed their entry to the hot zone. Then he briefly described the recon they conducted and the subsequent entry to the Wraith Carrier. Then he recounted the rescue operations and the entanglement with Wraith. He then summarized blowing up the ship, how they split up to accompany the Gemmondians and how the rest of them returned to the gate to report back to SGC, followed by the handover to Lt. Colonel Mitchell who showed up to take over the clean up. Once he finished, General Hammond turned to Mitchell.

"Lt. Colonel Mitchell, will you tell us what happened next?"

"Yes Sir. I went to Gemmond with SG-1, SG-3, SG-8, and SG-9. SG-3 was sent with the medical staff to the city to provide medical help and SG-8 went with them to help with the clean-up. I dropped off the Doctors McKay and Zelenka at the Dart crash sites along with Teal'c and SG-9 and took the Jumper to orbit to run a scan in near space. There were no other Wraith Spaceships in the vicinity. Then I returned to the city and stayed there to coordinate with the city council. I also spoke to some of those travelers who were taking refuge in Gemmond. They were from Holdus, Aegis, some even from Charos. They all had similar stories about this 'Culling', as they called it. It seems that this started about two weeks ago and there seem to be few other worlds targeted as well. So far they've been avoiding the technologically advanced planets though," continued Mitchell. "Then I took a trip to the village near the jungle where the rescued Gemmondians gathered with a couple of medical staff. They were all okay and being taken care of by the Nasyans. We spent the whole day in the city and the clean-up was rather quick, seeing as SG-11 got there pretty quickly and the Wraith didn't have much time for a larger attack. Then I collected the Doctors from where they were camping near crash sites and returned to the mountain for the debrief."

The General then turned his attention towards the two scientists;

"So Dr. McKay, Dr. Zelenka - any luck extracting the people stuck in those Darts?" he asked.

"Hmm, we've scanned those two Wraith Darts and found a way to connect with their interfaces. Basically, we’ve gone over the controls that dematerialize people, store their information, and then rematerialize them again when commanded to. It's a very complex process and requires a lot of power. Now, the Dart I scanned has five life signs and Radek's one has eight life signs. But according to the power readings we've got, those darts don't have enough power to rematerialize people on their own. But we can hook up a Naquadah generator into each of them and give a bit of extra oomph to restart the controls and activate the beam. Sort of like jump-starting a car battery." Rodney looked quite proud at having managed a properly dumbed-down report for the academically challenged.

"Ano, Rodney, we discussed this. There is a chance that those generators might not be the best way to restart those controls. You mustn't forget the biological components in those Darts - they are not like normal batteries that we can jump-start." Dr. Radek Zelenka pushed his spectacles further up his nose and reminded Rodney.

"I know, but if we regulate the levels and write a subroutine to abort if it gets over the power levels we need, it'd be fine." Rodney turned to face the Czech scientist and gestured with his muffin.

"A subroutine that we need to translate to match the coding on the interface. Yes, yes! It might work. But then we need..." Zelenka had already started typing something fast and McKay was leaning over to watch his screen.

"Ah, wait, there," he interrupted and the Czech said something unintelligible in his own language, still typing away. Now Rodney had abandoned his muffin and was also busy on his PDA while talking to Zelenka about code.

The two scientists had forgotten about the rest of the assembly and were completely immersed in their planning, typing, and conversing in increasingly complex scientific jargon. General Hammond let it continue for a while and then decided to interrupt when the scientists showed no signs of returning to the briefing. Out of all of them, only Carter seemed to be able to follow the dialog between them with an amused look on her face.

"As riveting as it is to be listening to you two gentlemen, can you please tell us whether this venture is possible or not? We really don't need to know the exact process," Hammond asked them both with great patience.

"Yes, General. We can do this. Maybe by tomorrow evening, we should be done. We will need a Naquadah generator though," said McKay, without looking up or without stopping his typing.

"Jack, can you accommodate that?" asked the Major General.

"Yeah, I'm sure we have one or two of those lying around here, somewhere," General Jack O'Neil replied, looking pointedly at Sergeant Harriman who confirmed with a firm nod.

"Well, then," started General Hammond, but was interrupted by Dr. Zelenka. "Can we be excused? We need to clean this up and get a proper program before we need to return to the planet."

"Yes, please. You may both take your leaves, doctors." A rather relieved General excused the pair without further delay. They both got up with their PDAs and left the room, bickering about the code and power levels.

"Commander, I was informed you have the footage of the entire operation?" he then inquired of McGarrett, who confirmed. "Now, Jack, I think this is something we should get all our Gate teams to start practicing. There is always one team or another who runs into something unexpected whenever they conduct Gate operations." He turned to the General.

"Yeah, I agree. But there is a concern, you know? What with the IOA and all their crap about respecting the privacy of the natives and such. SG-11 has a bit of leeway on this because they are a joint ops team and we had agreed to keep up their SEAL standards. So all their Gate missions go under Special-Operations per that agreement with the Navy. I think it's about time we took a long hard look at those pesky civilian regulations, especially since it's starting to look like trouble's brewing," said Jack O'Neill, for once looking completely serious.

"Hmm, I have a meeting with the IOA in a few days. I'll speak to the President as well before I meet with them. The chances are that we are going to have to raise the threat levels and will have to change some protocols accordingly, very soon," replied the General. He was already thinking about reaching out to the other races with advanced technologies and capabilities the earth had connections with; about this latest threat and ways to defend against it.

He then turned to Samantha Carter. "Carter, I'd like to review that footage now please."

Lt. Colonel Carter projected the video onto the screens on either side while Harriman dimmed the lights in the conference room. For the next 90 minutes or so, the entire conference room was quiet except for the sounds coming from the footage of the mission.

General O'Neill took it upon himself to break the thick silence that had descended in the Briefing Room at the end of the mission footage. "You know, I remember I sent SG-6 last year to Gemmond for the harvest celebrations. They brought back cake - really nice cake - and even nicer wine," he said wistfully, and then turned to where Sergeant Harriman was seated. "Walter, remind me next year when the time comes around, yeah?"

"Of course, General," the Sergeant replied with an equally serious air.

"That was an excellent bit of soldiering. My compliments to your team. Well done." General Hammond said. He was extremely impressed with the way the team handled the situation. He had harbored some concerns about how well they could mesh a SEAL team with an SGC team and this incident proved that it could be done quite seamlessly. He could see that each and every member brought a unique and impressive skill set to the team.

"Jack, I need a copy of this footage and all other data collected in a summarized report so I can present this to the president and the IOA. I might call an extra-planetary meeting to discuss this too. So be ready. And keep me posted if you get news from other planets on any encounters like this," He informed O'Neill. "So far, is there anything on the surveillance on those satellites and the Goa'uld activity?" he inquired.

"Nothing, but I believe this explains why they are waiting for the Wraith to stock up on supplies before starting whatever they are planning on. I have a feeling this might include an armada or two of alien fleets by the way things are going," said Jack O'Neill thoughtfully.

"The work on Prometheus is nearly completed. She will undergo her space trials in the next month, bringing our fleet to six. We shall see if we can persuade our allies to contribute as well. This information might just be what we need to apply that persuasion," General Hammond reflected. "All right people, thank you for your time. I will be in touch." He stood up, bringing the briefing to an end.

With that, everyone stood up as General George Hammond took his leave.

..........

It had been two days since the meeting with Major General George Hammond and SG-11 had just returned from a training session at the Alpha site, off-world. They had completed the medical checkups, cleaned themselves up, and were seated around a long table enjoying their dinner in the mess hall when Steve's phone started ringing.

The call came from a landline bearing a Hawaiian prefix. "Is this Mr. Steven McGarrett?" The voice was female. Steve winced at the 'Mr.' involuntarily, not used to being addressed as such.

"Yes, that's me. Who is this?" he asked.

"Sir, my name is Diana Curtis and I'm calling from Honolulu General Hospital. You’re listed as the next of kin for Captain John McGarrett. He was admitted to the hospital yesterday when he suffered a heart attack. Sir, his condition is stable for now. But we'd like you to be here and visit him if it is at all possible?” The professional no-nonsense voice delivered the news in such a calm manner, it took Steve a few seconds to register what the woman was saying and the seriousness of the situation.

"WHAT?" he barked into the phone, when he had recovered from the shock. The team sitting around him all stopped what they were doing and stared at Steve.

"Mr. McGarrett, please calm down. Your father's condition is stable for the moment. He was brought to the hospital on time. Are you able to make it here safely as soon as possible? Is there anyone who could bring you here?" The hospital admin on the line tried to placate the very agitated SEAL.

"Uh? Yes, yes. I'm not in Hawaii at the moment. But yes, I'll be there as soon as I can. Thank you for calling and letting me know," Steve collected himself enough to reply. His mind was still reeling at the shocking news he had just received. He had called his old man only two days ago and he had sounded fine on the phone - even happier at the fact that Steve was stationed somewhere in the mainland and could call home more or less on a regular basis.

"You’re welcome sir," the voice said crisply and disconnected the call. Steve stared at the phone in his hand dumbly, his mind refusing to cooperate and start being useful for the moment.

"Steve, what was that all about?" The touch on his arm and the concerned face of John - which was quite close to his - brought him back from the stupor he had got lost in. Steve stared at him for a moment and then found the words to reply.

"That was the Honolulu General. My dad, he's in the hospital, he had a heart attack," Steve said in a dull tone, still not able to believe that it was real. He felt John's grip tighten around his arm at the revelation.

"What? When? How?" Questions bombarded him incredulously. Steve took a couple of deep breaths in an attempt to bring his turbulent mind into some semblance of control and deal with the situation.

"I don't know, but I need to go there now," he said decisively, standing up.

"Hey, Steve, hey, they didn't say it's bad, did they? Just don't go by yourself." John was also standing with him and he realized John was holding him by the shoulders, shaking him slightly. He grabbed onto John automatically, his presence so close to him, helping Steve to ground himself. He concentrated on what John was saying to him and could hear the regret in his voice at not being able to go with Steve. They were the team leaders of SG-11 and one had to be at the mountain if the other was going to be unavailable.

"Don't worry man, I'll go with him," Danny was also standing up and looking worried. He also looked determined to follow the SEAL home no matter what Steve had to say about it.

"I need to go pack a bag, and yeah, Danny, you can come with," said Steve, starting to mentally list the things he needed to do in order to get moving.

"I'll help," Kono volunteered.

"Let me talk to Walter and contact Peterson AFB - there might be a transport or something going that way. It'd be quicker," Sheppard suggested, and was already moving towards the elevator to go to level 27. "I'll come back and see you in your quarters," he threw back over his shoulder as he entered the elevator.

"Shit, I need to apply for leave," said Steve, watching John disappear into the lift.

"Don't stress Commander, we'll take care of it." Bates patted him on the back and Cadman nodded along. "We will apply on behalf of you two. This is an emergency. So it'll be fine," said Vega. Then she and Bates both took off towards the HR offices to handle the paperwork for their Commander's emergency leave.

"Thanks, guys," Steve shouted after them. And then he hurried towards his own quarters with the rest of his team tagging along. He already had a duffel packed for emergencies and only needed to add a few more things. He tried calling his dad’s friend but the call went to voicemail. He figured that he could try contacting them once he reached the hospital. He wouldn't even think about calling his sister until he had the chance to see his father and knew more about his condition.

..........

Within 20 minutes, Steve and Danny were both waiting by the exit at Cheyenne mountain for the vehicle that had been signed off for them to be delivered to Peterson AFB. Walter had made the arrangements. There was an army cargo plane making a training run to Hickam and he had managed to arrange transport for the two SEALs with it. They'd make their own way back after the visit to the hospital.

"Steve, listen, it's gonna be alright. You hear me? It'll be fine! Your dad's a tough guy, he'll be fine." Sheppard was holding his face in his hands and Steve found himself nodding along to the assurances pouring out of his boyfriend. Then John kissed him softly on the lips and Steve sighed, leaning into the comfort. He rested his forehead on John's and wished with all his heart to wake up and realize that this was all just a bad dream.

"And don't forget to call, yeah?" John implored as he straightened and very reluctantly let go of Steve.

"Sure John, I'll call," He promised as the SUV came to a stop in front of them. He and Danny both got in and seated themselves. He then gave a short wave to John who was still standing there by the exit watching them leave. Steve hoped what John had told him would be true, that his dad would be able to make it through. He was not ready to lose his only remaining parent. ‘God please, not again! Not so soon...' His mind was repeating the mantra as Steve let out a weary sigh and closed his eyes.

#fanfiction series #stargate atlantis #steve mcgarrett #john sheppard #ao3fic #cross over #hawaii five 0 #stargate #fiction #my writing #writers on tumblr #bamf!John Sheppard

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serendipitous-magic · 3 years

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what's your writing process like? do you plot things out beforehand? or do you sort of write it as it comes? a mix of both?

Depends on what I'm writing!

In general I'm a planner. I can't write from a blank page, unless I'm just like... really really captivated by whatever I'm writing, which was what happened with the first chapters of both The Art of Living Your (Second) Life and The Partnership Plan.

a) In general, if it's a fanfiction I'm writing, I tend to build the plan as I write - meaning, oftentimes I'll be inspired to write the first chapter, and I'll write that with little idea what the rest of it will be. Or, even if I have an idea what the rest will be, it's more of a vague skeleton than a full plan. And then, as I continue to write, I think more about where the story is going and I continuously add to and refine my plan kind of alongside the actual writing. In this way, the plan grows at the same time that the actual chapters do - but because the chapters take significantly longer to write than planning does, the plan outpaces the "real" writing and I usually know the basic story arc from fairly early on. Then it's just a matter of fleshing it out, adding detail, writing down scenes I thought of, etc. And then when I get to that point in the actual writing, I have a framework in place already.

-_-_-

b) Sometimes for fanfic, I have a more complete plan upfront - although I use "complete" here to mean "from beginning to end," not "completely detailed." So, more like a full skeleton than a full body, if that makes sense. I did that with Roll for Strength. What usually happens is that my plan will look something like...

...

Chapter One

-Will suspects Mike has a girlfriend and is kind of put out about it but thinks he's over Mike so he tells himself he doesn't care

-Will walks in on Mike and his BF (name??) and has a crisis (they don't see Will, so Will knows about Mike but Mike doesn't know that Will knows)

-Will might get off to that later, guiltily? (Or move to chapter two)

Chapter Two

-Do Mike's POV to tell about how he ended up dating a guy, how he got very disillusioned with the world after canon events and got into a "fuck it, the rules don't matter and I hate them anyway" mentality, which eventually snowballed into him kind of realizing and accepting his sexuality earlier than usual fanon

-Also introduce BF (name??) in a scene

-Set time and place - season should set the mood if not already mentioned in Ch 1

-Maybe also do BF's POV briefly to introduce him?? Or leave that for later

...

Etc.

And that's the original skeleton plan. And then it gets expanded upon more and more and more as I continue to think about the story, sometimes even with full pages' worth of unbroken text blocks as I get inspired and start basically thought-vomiting an entire scene. So by the time I get around to actually writing it, it might look like the above, or it might be a few steps shy of an actual draft already, depending on how much I've thought about / worked on that part.

See #5 in this writing advice post to see what I mean about a "thought vomit" draft.

-_-_-

c) Here's the thing - the above was for fanfic, or for short stories, or stories that I'm just kind of having fun with.

For original stuff, I adhere much more tightly to the "rules," because the guidelines for original work (that you might try to publish in the actual publishing market) are much stricter - and for good reason! Fanfiction is a sandbox, and we're all invested in the characters and worlds and settings already. We're all reading and writing fanfic because we already love these characters and this world, and we just want to play in it.

It's a different situation with original novels that you hope to publish. The plot, pacing, tension, and story beats have to be much, much tighter and more polished. Because people reading original work have no prior reason to be invested in it or care what happens - that's work that you have to do. For fanfic, that work was done for you by the original thing. Not to mention, the publishing world is so absolutely choked with competition, and the emphasis lies so heavily on sales, that if your book isn't fucking top-tier compelling, no publisher or agent will take a second look at it. Which is kind of unfortunate, because there's value in slower, more relaxed, more reflective storytelling, too - it's just not what capitalism has decided to value, which is sad.

But anyway.

When writing an original thing, I basically need a full plan - beginning to end, covering all plot points. Not necessarily all the details, just all the plot points - I need a skeleton and I need connective tissue. The rest comes later. But to start, I need to know what happens, why, and how the characters get from event to event. I need to know the physical story events, the emotional beats, and how those things logically flow throughout the story.

Some people can write without this and it still turns into a compelling story, tight narrative, etc. I envy these people. I have all respect for these people. I cannot do this. If I write original work with no plan, and especially without at least like 50-75% of a plan, I end up with something slow, meandering, and kind of limp. No bueno.

So, I usually use a beat sheet.

What's a beat sheet?

It's a 15-beat plotting structure used by screenwriters. And, yeah, technically it's for movies / screenplays. But storytelling is storytelling. And it's highly flexible. (And my favorite professor ever taught it to me in college so you can pry it out of my cold dead hands.)

Google it. It's what I use to make sure my (original work) plots are tight, have momentum, have a satisfying character arc, etc.

Okay, okay, I'll paste the basic structure below just so you can see wtf I'm talking about:

-_-_-

-Act I:

1) The First Frame

-What is the first thing we see? This should be a snapshot of the main character’s problem, before the story begins

-Ex: the Star Destroyer in A New Hope

2) The World Around Us

-What is the main character’s world like at the beginning of the story?

-What is missing in the main character’s life?

3) State the Theme (sneak this into The World Around Us)

-What is the story secretly about? This should happen during The World Around Us

4) Inciting Incident (smol tentpole)

-What happens to put the hero on the road? This is where the hero’s life changes forever.

5) The Hero Questions

-1st introspective moment

-Can the hero really do this? Should the hero chicken out?

-Oftentimes the hero fails at something

-Ex: Luke gets his ass beat by the raiders

-Act II:

6) Crossing the Threshold / The Emotional Hurdle (big tentpole)

-The main character makes a choice

-Beginning of Act II

7) The B Story / The Love Story

-Introduced here

-Often but not always a love story

8) Promise of the Premise

-Fun and games in the world you promised

-Horror movie? Creeps here!

-Sci fi? Space battles!

-Animation? Shenanigans!

9) Midpoint (big tentpole)

-The hero finds out that what they want is not what they need

-Luke rescues the princess - turns out that’s not really what the story was about

10) Bad Guys Close In / Throwing Rocks

-Events conspire to tear the hero’s goal to shreds

-Wesley is mostly dead, Inego is drunk, Fezzick is part of the brute squad

-This is the other side of the fun and games coin where things are no longer fun

11) All is Lost

-Something super bad happens, and that goal is impossible

-If someone important is gonna die, it’s probably now

12) The Pit of Despair (smol tentpole)

-The hero mourns the death (if someone died) and wallows in his/her lowest point

13) Inspiration

-A fresh idea

-Act III:

14) Come and Get Some / Final Confrontation (big tentpole)

-The final confrontation - the final showdown

-A and B stories wrapping up at the same time

-The theme makes sense and the battle is engaged

15) Final Frame

-Opposite of the first frame

-The hero is changed

-_-_-

It's what I use. But hey, you don't have to. What works for me might not work for you.

I'll finish this off by pasting in a section of actual real-ass planning I have open in a document for one of my novels at this moment (it's giving me the evil eye, I swear) so you can see what I kind of mean by "thought vomiting." Also note that in my actual document, the bullet points are indented incrementally to be kind of "nestled" underneath the relevant points, if that makes sense, and that it's a whole eye-watering mess of different colors. But for Tumblr, it's this:

-_-_-

-You have to be rescued by the rest of the team, because you fell down that hole - and you are, eventually, after screaming yourself hoarse some more (plus it’s been like an hour or more now, so they have since noticed that you were missing)

-I could gloss over this, like end the chapter when you run away, and open the next one with “It takes another half hour of screaming your throat nearly bloody before the team finds you,” or something

-They berate you for chasing after ghosts - you say you didn’t find anyone down there, because you know for damn sure nobody’s gonna believe what you think you saw, and you don’t even think you believe it

-This leads to a trip to the local doctor (a clinic, probs, akin to UrgentCare), which you’re not happy with because that’s more people taking notice of you

-However, you’re also going through the change in mindset here - see below

-Note: I as the writer don’t have to worry about the paperwork or whatever that you’d normally have to fill out, getting hurt on the job, because you weren’t officially hired - however, it would be a good “humanity is okay” moment if the guy who hired you came in and helped you with the medical expenses because he felt bad - he’d also probably be a little nervous about you suing or something, but you assure him that you have zero interest in that

-I could include a funny line where the guy says he’ll pay for your doctor bill and you try to say no (being indebted to someone is bad news for you) but he insists, because he says he feels responsible, and you just kind of stare at him and then blurt, “Do you need me to kill anyone for you?” (Something you probably regret as soon as you say it, not because you expect him to accept but because you abruptly remember what happened two days ago.) (Would it be too much to also add like “You want me to murder anyone for you? You want a blowjob? I will do anything,” and he gets flustered and bats it off like “Nah, nah, nah, chill out. You’re crazy, man.” And insists that you don’t need to pay him back)

-Here’s a decision I have to make - does the guy pay for your doctor bills as well as paying for your work today (leaving you enough money to potentially split town, but you decide not to), or do you have to pay the $2,500+ in doctor bills with no insurance for the injury, which raises the stakes by depleting all your money?

-I think I like Option A best, because it gives Sam more agency as a character if they decide to stay despite having the option to leave, versus them just being stuck completely - plus I don’t know how else I’d be able to explain away you having money for the hotel

-The guy who hired you pays you for the work day here - and maybe, just maybe, that gives you barely enough to buy that used car (although, why would it? It couldn’t have been more than like $200 for 8 hours of work, maybe $300 if he was really really desperate - if it was a really cheap used car, that might give you barely enough to buy the car but literally nothing left over)

-Point being, maybe you have enough money to bolt now, if you chose to - and you have to make the choice not to

-The car you found might be a $1,500 Honda Civic (or Jeep or whatever) with a dead battery, and the guy selling it says it should run fine with a new battery, which you Google (apparently it would be somewhere in the range of $100-$200) - maybe you think of how nice the mechanic was for you and wonder if you could cut a bit of a deal with him, if you get this car - and if the guy pays for your trip to the doctor and pays you for the temp work, this could just tip you into the margin of being able to afford the car, if you haggle with the seller

-_-_-

Or another example, with more actual sentences:

-_-_-

-As you approach the trailer you start to register a smell that turns your stomach - something like a porta potty and something like the sharp tang of rusting metal. It makes you pause - maybe there really is someone in there, using the place to live whether there’s a sewage hookup or not - it wouldn’t be the weirdest thing you’ve heard of. But after standing for a bit, silent and listening, and then hiding behind a large tree to chuck a rock at the vehicle to no response, you continue forward. You’ll just have to be cautious. Your spirits lift when you see the door. It’s completely grown over. (Leafy vines lace over it, tangling in the handle, yellowing and unbroken. If someone is living in there, they’ve been using the window to come and go, and that doesn’t seem all too likely. Bolstered by a new swell of confidence, and picturing the unlikely riches you might find stashed away in a cabinet or a glove compartment, you cross the last few feet towards the shape.

-You find the body and recognize it as one of the two obnoxious vlogging dudes from the motel

-I’m kind of imagining the moment of discovery like the wardrobe moment in Narnia where, during your nice forest trek, there’s been some pleasant acoustic music playing (like All the Pretty Girls by Kaleo maybe) and then it just stops abruptly in the middle of a phrase, maybe echoing slightly, when you see the body, and all at once everything is sickly silent.

-Oh dude, maybe you continue thinking it’s a duffel bag (possibly feeling pretty upbeat, though cautious until you’re literally about to step over it, and then you happen to glance down and get a sickening, chest-slamming shock when an empty human face is staring up at you

-Note: there should be mushrooms growing in, on and around the RV, because mushrooms are Creepy

-You go to investigate the RV

-Maybe you recognized the body as one of the vloggers and you’re trying to see if his friend is around - or maybe, in a kind of sick daze, you short circuit and find yourself doing the only thing you can think to do: continuing along your trajectory, stumbling towards the RV and tearing the rusted-out door free from the lattice of brittle vines that held it in place (this is what alerts The Dude that someone has been here), like if you just get to your original goal that’ll fix everything - somehow, if you just keep moving forward on the track you set out on, that thing won’t be real anymore - at the very least you have to get inside, to put a door between you and the body, like you’re pulling the blankets over your head to shield yourself from the boogeyman. Just as long as you’re not out there with, with...

-_-_-

Anywho, I'll stop.

I apologize again for... (scrolls up for a million miles) all of that, but you asked me about my passion and now you pay the price, lmao.

#asks #anon #writing #writing advice #i guess?#my writing #thought vomit draft #also you get a sneak peek at The Vanishing Day I guess lmao

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