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sansaorgana · 2 months

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— THROWN TO THE WOLVES (I)

PART TWO || PART THREE || PART FOUR PART FIVE || PART SIX || PART SEVEN PART EIGHT || PART NINE || PART TEN

PAIRING — Na-Baron Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen x fem!Reader // Atreides!OC

SUMMARY — After receiving the news from the Emperor about moving to Arrakis, Duke Leto suspects the upcoming war with the Harkonnens. His daughter's marriage with the Baron's heir is supposed to create an alliance and ensure his family's safety. Previously sheltered and protected Princess Atreides must now face the harsh reality on her own.

AUTHOR’S NOTE — It’s written as an usual x Reader fic without describing anything about the Reader’s looks but I still classified it as an OC as well since she is Paul Atreides' half-sister. I had this idea even before watching the movie... 😂 but I patiently waited to go to the cinema before starting to write. The fic starts around the events of the first movie but I imagine all characters to be a bit older than in canon – I hope it's okay since all the actors are adults. I can't believe I used to write fanfics where the Reader was Duke Leto's wife and now I'm switching sides like that! 🤣 I don’t know much about Dune’s Universe because I’ve only seen the new movies but I tried to do a bit of research. 🙏🏻

WARNINGS — arranged marriage, blood, mentions of death & actual death, violent behaviour, syringes & blood drawing, mentions of planned and scientifical breeding, Reader's behaviour might be interpreted as spoiled / ungrateful / rude (she's not supposed to be a good person)

WORD COUNT — 6,340

ENGLISH IS MY SECOND LANGUAGE.

THROWN TO THE WOLVES (I)

Duke Leto was standing by the window with his hands clasped behind his back as he watched his son training in the courtyard and his daughter reading a book on one of the stone steps. Last week he had received the news about the Emperor’s decision to move his family to an unfriendly world of Arrakis. He was aware of the consequences of such a decision. He knew that the Emperor always had his bigger purpose.

“What is troubling you?” Lady Jessica stood behind him and put her hand on his shoulder.

“The war with the Harkonnens is coming,” Duke Leto sighed. “And I don’t know what to do to protect my family from it.”

Lady Jessica furrowed her brows. She had been waiting for this moment for a long time now but the moment never seemed to be right.

“What if you make an alliance?” She proposed with her lips inches away from his ear as her hands hugged his chest from behind.

“An alliance? With the Harkonnens?” The Duke couldn’t grasp the concept. “How?”

“You have something very precious here that for some reason you are hiding from the world. But we all have to serve our families. Women serve their families in their own ways, Leto,” Lady Jessica smiled softly and pointed her finger at Princess (Y/N).

Innocent and unaware Princess (Y/N), reading a book and watching her half-brother train. She was wearing a pretty dark green dress with long sleeves that were supposed to protect her from the harsh winds of Caladan. Her hair was done up in a beautiful way by one of her maids and her eyes were as sad as usual.

“She will be sent to her mother’s family soon,” Duke Leto reminded Lady Jessica. “That was my agreement with them.”

“Yes, and what will she do there? She can’t hide away from the big world. She is her mother’s daughter but she’s also an Atreides. You raised her. She owes you loyalty,” Lady Jessica explained. “If you ask her to keep your family safe, she shall do it.”

“I would never send my daughter to those monsters,” The Duke shook his head and turned around to face Lady Jessica. “I am her father. I might have not loved her mother like I love you. But I love her as much as I love our son.”

“If our son was a girl, he’d be the one sent to the Harkonnens,” Lady Jessica reminded him. “Of course her bloodline is not as perfect as Paul’s but she will do. I’ve spoken to the sisters about it and…”

“You’ve spoken to the sisters about it?!” The Duke’s eyes widened at that revelation. “You have already discussed my daughter with the Bene Gesserit?”

“I raised her, too!” Lady Jessica raised her voice. “She is not mine and I would never call her my daughter but I care about her, too. I watched her grow, I teached her, I soothed her after her nightmares. I was there for her. But she can’t hide from her destiny on her grandparent’s planet. She is Princess Atreides.”

The Duke remained silent. He took a deep breath in and looked out of the window once more. His son was already hiding the blades after the training and approaching his sister.

You closed the book and squinted your eyes at the sight of Paul approaching you with a smile. He was a little younger than you but he was the future Duke. In a fair world, you would be the Duchess of Caladan. You were older and you were a daughter of your father and his wife. Paul was basically a bastard.

And he was weak. You didn’t want to say it out loud but you had been watching him train for quite a long time now and you didn’t see a future Duke in him. You kept thinking that you’d make a better one. After all, you were supposed to be born a boy and a future Duke. But your mother was no Bene Gesserit witch and she could not manipulate her child’s gender. She died giving birth to you and she didn’t secure your father with an heir. Lady Jessica did.

So you had to watch Paul struggling with his trainings as you pretended to read books. You had asked your father to let you train as well but he didn’t agree. You were a Princess. If you were to gain an ugly scar on your face, your value would decrease.

“How was it?” Paul pinched you teasingly as you closed the book loudly to show him your annoyance at that gesture.

“The book?” You asked.

“No, my training.”

“I haven’t been paying attention to it,” you lied and shrugged your arms. “It’s starting to rain, let’s go back inside,” you stood up and he followed you to the gates. “I was thinking of giving away most of my dresses to the poor. I won’t need them on Arrakis, the ones with long sleeves and fur,” you told him.

“But you won’t be on Arrakis with us for long,” Paul reminded you.

“My mother’s planet is warm, too. It’s sunny and it almost never rains,” you explained. “I will not need these dresses there either.”

“It is sad that you will have to leave us,” Paul looked down.

You tried to hate him but sometimes you couldn’t. And as much as you hated everything about this family and how you were treated in it… He still remained your younger brother. And it wasn’t his fault that his mother was a witch and that your father loved him more than you.

“I will visit you and you will visit me,” you told him with a shy smile. “I am looking forward to moving to my grandparents and to choose any noble man on their planet I want to marry,” you chuckled.

Of course you’d rather stay and become a Duchess of Caladan. But that was out of option.

“I’ll see you later, I have to look through my dresses. I don’t trust my maid’s choices with them,” you told your brother and you went to your chambers.

You placed the book down on the desk and you caressed your mother’s picture. You had never known her since she died giving birth to you. But you always craved to meet her and you always daydreamed about her still being alive. Lady Jessica was no substitute to you. And she had never tried to be.

There were political marriage unions that were supposed to make alliances but there was also a different type of an union, a more mysterious and weird kind of it – the one that was calculated and planned by the Bene Gesserit. Your mother was supposed to give Duke Leto his heir and Lady Jessica was supposed to give him a daughter that would later be sent away to another great house and continue that malicious and intentional bloodline. To you, it was all witchcraft. You didn’t trust any of that because you didn’t trust Lady Jessica.

You knew that when your mother had been dying and you were being born, your father was not there. He was with her as she was already pregnant with Paul.

You knew about a lot of things from the maids that had come to Caladan with your mother. You knew your father had not been a bad man to her but he couldn’t force himself to love her. And you knew how much she had wanted to go back home. She had missed the sun and the warmth. And now she would remain forever on this grey and rainy planet. As a former Duchess of it, she had to be buried on Caladan.

You were occupied with the dresses in your closet when you felt someone’s presence in the chamber with you. You turned around and sighed at the sight of Lady Jessica.

“I’m thinking about giving away some of them to the poor,” you pointed at one of the dresses laying on your bed. “They will be no use on Arrakis,” you explained.

Lady Jessica remained silent as she leaned on the wall and kept watching you. You didn’t like that.

“What is it?” You asked.

“There’s a change of plans,” she finally cleared her throat as she straightened herself. You furrowed your brows.

“We are not moving?” You asked with hope. You were not a fan of Caladan but Arrakis sounded a hundred times worse.

“No. We are but you will not come with us,” Lady Jessica informed you.

At this point, you were confused.

“Am I moving to my grandparents earlier? Or… Or will I stay here to represent House Atreides?” Your eyes sparkled at the idea.

You already imagined yourself ruling the planet in your father’s name. Wearing regal dresses and being important. Perhaps proving to him that you’d be good at this job and he would let you do it for the rest of your life.

“You will help us to prevent the upcoming war with the Harkonnens,” Lady Jessica smiled softly. “You will be sent to Giedi Prime to marry the Baron’s heir.”

The sparkles in your eyes disappeared in an instant as your hands dropped down the gown you had been holding.

“No…” you whispered. “This cannot be true… My father would never agree to that.”

“He just did.”

“It’s… It’s your mending, you witch,” your fists clenched. “I must speak to my father myself,” you walked past her furiously.

You didn’t know what to think. But as long as you didn’t hear that from your father, it felt like it was a cruel joke on Lady Jessica’s side.

“Father,” you pushed the door leading to his office without knocking. He was sitting behind his desk as if he had already been expecting you. There was a deep wrinkle on his forehead and his eyes looked sad and worried when he laid them on you. “Tell me it is not true,” you demanded.

“You will be sent to the Harkonnens,” the Duke nodded his head.

“You can’t do this to me!” You yelled and banged your fists on his desk. The loud sound echoed through the chamber. “I had my whole life already planned… You cannot just…”

“I can,” he interrupted you and stood up, “and I will. We were not supposed to move to Arrakis. We were not supposed to be involved in this spice conflict. Things changed for all of us. You will go to Giedi Prime and secure the alliance.”

“How can you even speak to me about the alliance with them?” You asked. “How? Ever since I was a little girl, I’ve been taught about the Harkonnens. I’ve been taught everything about them for the simple fact that they are our enemies. How can you send your daughter to them just like that?”

“You’ve said it yourself. You’ve been studying them since you were a little girl. You know their culture and their customs. It will be easy for you,” he tried to convince you.

Convince you to… what exactly? Convince you to agree to this without being forced to? Convince you that it would be indeed easy? Like it had been easy for your mother…? And all the women of all history forced to get married before her?

It was never easy. It was only easy for men to say it.

“I wish it was women ruling over the world,” you gritted through your teeth. “And I wish it was men being sent away from their homes and families to unknown worlds to start their life over, to become someone else’s property, to obey. I really do wish that, father.”

“That remains nothing but a wish,” he commented on that with a sad smile. “It brings me no pleasure to send you there. But you have your duties, too.”

“I have studied their customs and their culture. They are monsters. You are throwing me to the wolves. I will not survive this,” your voice finally broke as the realisation hit you that it was indeed happening.

You would be sent to Giedi Prime.

“Father!” Paul’s voice interrupted you both as he ran inside the chamber. His cheeks were flushed as he was taking deep breaths in after running. “You can’t do that! You can’t send her there!”

Oh, how cute your little brother was sometimes.

“The decision has been made, my son,” the Duke told him.

“Don’t be angry at him,” you turned around to face Paul. “You can thank your mother for that,” you added viciously before leaving the chamber angrily and going back to your own.

Everything was packed and the castle seemed to be as empty as never before. The ships were ready to take off and the Caladan weather was saying goodbye in its own manner – with a never ending rain.

The thing was, your family was going to Arrakis. You were going to Giedi Prime. Alone.

Well, you had two of your maids with you like your mother had been gifted two from her homeplanet on her way to Caladan. And you had your mother’s wedding dress, too. Beautiful, handmade snow-white lace, layered and folded in all the right places. It was elegant and innocent looking. Your mother’s maids had been telling you stories that for a moment they thought your father would love her. Because he had been so mesmerised by her in that dress.

It hadn’t happened, though.

“I thought you’d go with me. You or Paul at least. Some man from the family to give me away to them. To stay for the ceremony and make sure I am safe,” you told your father as you were walking beside him. It was your last walk together on Caladan.

“I can’t go now, I am needed on Arrakis. Your safety is ensured. They would not dare to hurt you. You’re Princess Atreides, don’t let them make you forget about that,” your father put his hands on your shoulders.

“Sometimes I wish I wasn’t,” you admitted and looked down, defeated. Your father’s hands dropped down to hold yours. He furrowed his brows at how cold and shaky they were.

“Have some courage, my child.”

“Why does it feel like you’re getting rid of the burden?” You asked while biting on your lower lip.

“You have never been a burden to me,” he pulled you closer for a hug. You felt warm tears rolling down your cheeks.

You really wanted to believe his words but you couldn’t. You still felt like an unwanted daughter and a painful reminder of a woman he had been forced to marry once.

“You are my daughter, remember that,” Duke Leto took a step back to wipe the tears off of your cheeks. “You will forever be.”

You didn’t say anything to that. How would you even tell him that you wished you weren’t?

You went back to the hangar silently. Everyone was waiting for you so the ships would take off. Paul ran up to you and gave you a hug.

“I wish you could go with us on Arrakis,” he said with tears in his eyes.

“I can’t believe I’m saying this but I’d also rather go to Arrakis than Giedi Prime,” you confessed. “That planet sounds dreadful.”

“They’re lucky to have you. You’ll make it bloom,” Paul tried to cheer you up.

“Or they will poison me and I will wither,” you smiled sadly and kissed his forehead goodbye.

You only nodded your head at Lady Jessica and she nodded her head back with a smile.

You had been trying to overthink her plans. She either wanted you on Giedi Prime badly or she didn’t want you on Arrakis for some reason. But there was no point of losing sleep over that. You had other things to worry about now. Because finding out her motives wouldn’t change your situation anyway.

You had been informed in a message from the Harkonnens to your father that your husband would be Baron’s nephew named Feyd-Rautha who was your brother’s age and a future baron. His current title was na-baron and he was known for winning many fights as a gladiator. Really, the whole message from the Harkonnens sounded more like an eulogy praising him and his achievements. But it didn’t include his portrait or anything said about his character.

Your achievements were nonexistent but you were a Princess and no one expected any from you. Still, it felt humiliating when your father had been writing in his message that his daughter was innocent, pure, well-behaved, educated on the matter of the customs of her new house. Tidy, pretty, ready to give heirs. It made you feel nauseous.

You knew that the atmosphere on Giedi Prime was unusual after centuries of pollution. You knew everything about this planet and people. Still, looking outside the ship’s window, at first you thought something was wrong with your eyesight.

“Everything is black and white… I don’t see colour,” you rubbed your eyelids.

“It is normal, Princess. The colours cannot be seen outside,” one of the maids reminded you in a calm tone of voice.

You wondered how they could be so calm, your maids. After all, they were moving away from homes, too. And they would never leave to Arrakis with the ship like its captain and the crew. No, they’d stay on this planet with you forever.

“Time to get dressed, Princess,” the second maid entered your cabin. “The captain says we are landing soon.”

“We will be greeted by the servants. They will lead us inside where you will be officially introduced to the Baron and his family,” your first maid reminded you of the schedule. “What dress would you like to wear now, Princess?”

The wedding would take place tomorrow. Now you had to choose a dress to make your first impression.

“I’ll go with something bright,” you decided. “Modest, humble. I want to present myself to them exactly as they imagine me.”

“How would that be then, Princess?” The maid asked, slightly confused.

“Like a prey,” you explained.

They looked at each other but they said nothing. You stood up and opened your arms to let them undress you from your nightgown and then dress you. They put a creamy white silk dress on your body. It could have been your wedding dress if you hadn't already chosen your mother’s.

The jewellery was modest, too. The biggest and the most outstanding piece was a necklace with your house’s emblem. You asked for delicate makeup, too but your maids still made sure the blush on your cheeks would stand out.

When the ship landed, you left it with your maids and a few crew members. The Harkonnen servants looked both scary and scared – and that was an odd mix, especially in that black-and-white light. Their eyes were huge and dark, their skin pale and their heads bald. Both, men and women. They were also dressed in long white robes and they seemed to be terrified of doing something wrong. The men showed your crew members where to take all of your bags and chests. The women bowed down to you and led you inside the huge black fortress.

You swallowed thickly at the size and architectural style of it. It was black and industrial; reminded you of a jail for very dangerous criminals. You couldn’t imagine spending the rest of your life in a fortress like that. Certainly not after growing up on Caladan, in a castle on a cliff. You’d spend your whole days walking around and admiring nature. But on Giedi Prime there was no nature.

The air made you cough and you were exposed to it for five minutes maximum. Still, your lungs felt as if they were filled with a black, slimy liquid. You tried to cough it out before entering the Baron’s huge throne room.

One of the maids tapped your back lightly and you thanked her with a nod of your head. There were tears in the corners of your eyes now from that air and from trying to stop yourself from coughing when the heavy black doors opened in front of you.

“Princess (Y/N) Atreides,” you were announced.

You tried not to show any emotion on your face as you walked towards the throne. Your maids stayed behind and you had to face Baron Vladimir Harkonnen on your own.

As scary as he looked – especially with all the machinery around him – you tried to remember what your father had once told you. He was just a pathetic man who would be easily killed if someone had enough courage to stand very close to him and cut all these bubbles and tubes off. It was his morbid obesity – not his cruelty or special abilities – that made him look even less human than other people on this planet. He was a cruel man, of course he was. But he was also sick and that was the reason for his unusual looks that were so scary to most. You tried to remember about that but it was difficult because he was clearly the most powerful person in this room as he watched you with a smirk.

The power of that gaze was so strong that you stumbled a little on your way. And then someone else’s chuckle made you finally remember that Baron Vladimir Harkonnen wasn’t there alone.

You laid your embarrassed eyes on the young man standing next to the baron. His eyes were watching you closely and they were squinted as if he was a snake. The other man, standing on the other side of the Baron, was much older. So you assumed that the laughing one was your husband-to-be.

Your heart skipped a beat at the sight of him. He looked better than the other men you had seen so far on Giedi Prime. But it didn’t mean he was handsome or that he looked kind. On the contrary, he looked terrifying. And the way he laughed at your clumsiness was nothing but cruel. You felt blood in your veins turn cold.

You would die on this planet. Sooner than later. You would die, you thought. You wouldn’t survive it. You weren’t able to. At this very moment you felt like laying down on the floor and crying already. How were you supposed to keep being brave? It was impossible.

You were not raised for this. You were not prepared.

You suddenly felt angry at your father. At Lady Jessica. At Paul, even, for not stopping them. It no longer felt like you had been sent here to be ridden of. It felt like you had been sent here to die.

“Princess Atreides,” Baron’s voice caught you by surprise. You didn’t expect it to be so rough. But on the other hand, what else would you expect from a man like him?

He was visibly mocking you as you stood in front of him and bowed down a little. None of the men bowed down to you, though. You were a Princess, they were supposed to do that. But they did not care and you had no courage to remind them of the courtesy.

“Baron Harkonnen,” you greeted him.

“Welcome to my world,” he opened his arms. “I do hope you find it pleasant.”

You swallowed thickly. Another mockery.

“I do find it interesting,” you answered diplomatically.

“Let me introduce my nephews to you,” he pointed at the older man. “Count Glossu Rabban.”

“My Lord,” you bowed down a little again but he did not move. In fact, he looked quite bored to be there.

“Princess,” he only said and nodded his head very slightly. He was not a pleasant man and he was big and intimidating.

“And my favourite,” Baron pointed at the younger one, the one you had been trying to avoid looking at for a while now. You feared to lay your eyes on him because seeing him would make him real. As long as you weren’t looking, you thought, he wasn't existing. But the world didn’t work this way.

You were also surprised that the Baron didn’t hesitate to so openly admit which one was his favourite. As Paul’s sister, for a short while, you almost felt sorry for Count Rabban. You had this one thing in common with him – being second favourite.

It was weird to realise how similar some things might be between people so different.

“Na-baron Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen,” Baron introduced the younger man. “Your husband-to-be.”

“My Lord,” you bowed down at him.

“Princess,” he greeted you with a hiss. Tone of his voice was identical to his uncle’s and it made shivers run down your spine.

This was the voice of the man you’d spend the rest of your life with…? You found it difficult to imagine how you’d ever get used to it.

He didn’t bow down nor nod his head even a little. He had a menacing smirk on his lips as he watched you so intensely that you had to look away for a while. From the corner of your eye, you noticed him licking his lips in a vulgar manner.

“You will be taken to your chambers now to rest after your journey. The wedding will take place tomorrow,” was all the Baron announced and both of his nephews left the room just like that.

Not that you actually wanted to spend time with Feyd-Rautha but you were surprised that they didn’t care at all for you to get to know him a bit better before the wedding.

“One more thing,” Baron said when you were about to leave the room as well. You turned around to look at him. “A medic will visit you. You will obey his orders. Don’t get shy when he tells you to take your clothes off. He will not hurt you.”

“Y-yes, my Lord,” you nodded your head. You were in no position to tell him you disagreed. You might have been a Princess but you quickly realised it meant nothing to them and your father wasn't here to remind them.

You were surprised to see the room you had been taken to. It was not princess-worthy. In fact, it was not even guest-worthy. It looked more like a prison cell. You had the privacy of your own bathroom but there was nothing more except for the bed and your bags and chests scattered all over the floor. The room had no balcony and no windows either.

“Is it my room?” You asked the servant girl. She looked terrified when you spoke to her.

“Yes, Princess.”

“Is this a joke?” You asked her and she took a step back, probably used to the Harkonnens being violent towards her.

“It’s temporary… For now…” She stuttered out.

“Alright,” you nodded, feeling sorry for her. “I do not blame you. What is your name?” You tried to ask but her eyes widened even further and she ran away out of your room.

When she left it, the doors closed heavily and you could hear that the guards locked them.

“Marvellous,” you whispered to yourself with a sigh.

You took a shower and went to bed. You were exhausted after the journey but you were also too anxious to actually fall asleep. Under your pillow, though, you found a small black box. You opened it and it contained two white pills and a note.

It will help you sleep – Baron H.

You didn’t trust any pill given to you by the Baron Harkonnen but you were desperate to fall asleep and forget about your troubles for a while. And if it had killed you, well… You would be grateful, to be honest.

You put one of the pills on your tongue and it dissolved quickly, leaving a bittersweet taste. Two minutes later you were already asleep.

In the morning you were awakened by your maids and the Harkonnen medic. He ordered them to undress you and he inspected your body all over. It felt humiliating but you were aware that some families had this custom of checking the brides thoroughly before the wedding.

What surprised you more, though, was the fact he was drawing your blood, too. And he tried to make an injection of a weird substance, but you stopped him.

“What is this?” You asked, terrified.

Sleeping pills was one thing but getting injected with an odd liquid to your veins was another.

“It’s for health, Princess,” he tried to explain but it was obvious that you didn’t believe him. You moved away from the syringe as far as you could.

“What is this?” You asked once again.

“It will help to control your cycle,” he admitted.

“My cycle?” You furrowed your brow.

“What do you think is your purpose here?” He asked, without even addressing you properly. That was no way for a medic to speak to a Princess. But you assumed that if you told Baron Harkonnen about it, he’d only laugh. No one was taking you seriously here.

Your father’s voice echoed through your mind… That no one would harm you because you were Princess Atreides… Oh, how surprised he would be now. If he had been here. But he was not. You kept thinking about his absence all the time. How could he leave you like that…?

“My purpose here is to ensure an alliance between my house and The Harkonnen Dynasty,” you straightened yourself.

“No, your purpose is to give na-baron an heir and secure the Harkonnen bloodline. You will be given many injections like this and many tests will be run on your body. None of this will harm you but it will ensure that you will give na-baron a healthy son who would inherit only the best genetic material from both sides,” the medic told you.

“This is insane,” you shook your head. It reminded you of the Bene Gesserit ways… only it was even worse.

“Insane or not, Princess, you will obey,” the medic approached you with the syringe and injected the liquid into your thigh. You hissed at that and he chuckled. “Why would we hurt you before you give our na-baron an heir? Until that moment you are the most precious and protected cargo in this fortress.”

Until that time. You didn’t want to think what would happen after.

“Your bloodline is not as perfect as your brother’s but it will do. Especially with my help,” he patted your thigh and walked away to hide your blood samples into his bag. “Your son might rule the whole Empire one day.”

You pursed your lips, trying not to say anything because you were sure that the medic was also Baron's spy. You wanted to tell him, though, that they were all insane.

“Oh, also,” he said before leaving your room, “na-baron wants to see you before the wedding. Tell the guards when you’re ready and they will take you to his chamber,” he bowed down to you and left.

“Is it customary here to consummate the marriage before the ceremony?” One of your maids asked you.

“No,” you shook your head. “But this man doesn’t look like he cares about any customs. None of them do,” you shook your head, trying not to burst into tears.

Shakingly, you allowed your maids to put your mother’s wedding dress on you. It had been adjusted to fit you perfectly but now you almost regretted choosing it for the wedding. The Harkonnens didn’t deserve to see it nor to see you wearing it. It was sacred and this planet was the opposite of that.

Your bridal make up was a bit bolder than the day before. Still humble but more visible. Your hair was done really pretty and there were small white pearls here and there that complimented your beautiful dress and the pearl earrings.

You smiled sadly at your maids and knocked upon the door of your room for the guards to open it. You heard them unlock it and you walked out carefully, holding your dress up to make sure it wouldn’t get dirty on the floor.

“I am ready to see na-baron,” you told them and they nodded.

You followed them through the fortress, thinking of how much in fact you were not ready to see him. A few times you gained the courage to face him but it would quickly disappear. And you still were walking through the never ending mazes of corridors and halls.

The part of the fortress where they took you was much prettier than the one you had spent your night in. You could see that it was a palace where the nobility lived. And you became quite sure that your last night’s room had indeed been a cell.

The guards finally stopped in front of one of the heavy, black doors and knocked upon them. You swallowed thickly, realising that you still had no strategy on how to deal with Feyd-Rautha.

You hoped that you’d get an idea once you’d get to know him more.

“Come in,” his deep voice ordered and the guards opened the door. They showed you with their hands to walk inside, so you did, and they closed the door loudly behind you.

Feyd-Rautha was standing in the middle of the room, surrounded by two servant girls and three women that looked nothing like the servants but they also did not look like any ladies. They were dressed in black leather and eyeing you up and down as if you were a dessert. They were clearly making fun of you and your wedding outfit. They were making you feel uncomfortable and you’d rather be alone with him than have their company.

Feyd himself did not mind their rude behaviour. He was shirtless and wearing nothing but black pants.

“Come, come,” he encouraged you to walk closer, “I am getting ready for our ceremony,” he informed you and nodded at one of the servant girls. She was working on putting the clothes on his pale and incredibly muscular body.

You realised that he’d be able to break you in half if he wanted to. And you did not like that idea.

You walked up to him, slowly and nervously. You were scared to disobey his order.

“Well, well, well,” he teased and three women giggled viciously.

“Who are they?” You asked, having a feeling that they were his lovers.

Your pride and honour won with your fear. After all, you were a Princess. They were no equal to you.

“Oh, they’re my pets,” he explained to you with a smirk. “Don’t worry, you’ll be my pet, too. Just of a different kind.”

The women hissed at you jealously and you straightened yourself to present yourself more dignified.

“Why did you want to see me?” You asked.

He froze for a second as his eyes scanned you.

“You have a big mouth, Princess,” he noticed.

“Do I? What makes you think so? Because I speak to you like you are my equal? We are equal,” you reminded him.

Yes, he was scary. But he was pissing you off. Everything was pissing you off about this whole situation. And your fear would often turn into anger. You had problems with that ever since you were a little girl. Spoiled little Princess, your father would call you. And when you were getting angry, you weren’t thinking of the consequences.

“That is where you are mistaken,” Feyd moved swiftly and before you noticed, you had him standing right in front of you with a sharp blade pointed at your face. “We are not equal, woman.”

That was when you realised your mistake. The medic had told you that you were the most protected cargo. But not for Feyd. For his uncle.

“My Lord, the Baron said to treat Princess gently,” one of the servant girls gasped and you laid your eyes on her. It was the same girl who had shown you to your room the previous night. She had to like you if she risked so much.

She quickly regretted that outburst of courage. Feyd moved his arm without even looking at her and slit her throat.

Your eyes widened as you had never seen death like this. And the blood from her neck splashed all over your face and your beautiful wedding gown.

You burst into tears, not being able to control it anymore.

“Aw,” Feyd raised your chin up with his blooded blade as his three pets laughed at you, “my delicate Princess is crying over dead slaves?”

You did cry about her. And about yourself. But that was not the answer he wanted.

“You’ve ruined my dress,” you sobbed and he smirked.

“Don’t cry, my pet, my servants will wash it,” he took the blade away.

“I don’t have any other for the wedding,” you sniffed and tried to dry your cheeks with the palms of your hands. They soon became bloody since your face had not been wet only with the tears.

“I think you look good for the wedding,” Feyd walked away from you to let the remaining servant girl continue dressing him up. “In fact, I think you look better now,” he added and you looked at him like he was crazy.

Well, he was crazy.

“You might leave now. We’ll see each other at the ceremony,” he told you and you nodded your head before turning around to leave his chamber as soon as possible. You wanted to be out of this room.

“You may feast on your breakfast, my pets,” was the last thing you heard before walking out and from the corner of your eye you saw the three women jumping on the dead servant girl’s body.

You felt sick and dizzy. You wanted to scream and run away but the guards took you by your arms to guide you to the throne room that had been decorated for the ceremony of your wedding to na-baron Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen.

MASTERLIST

#dune imagine #dune x reader #dune fanfic #feyd rautha x reader #feyd rautha imagine #feyd rautha fanfic #feyd rautha harkonnen x reader #feyd rautha harkonnen imagine #feyd rautha harkonnen fanfic #lilysfiction #austin butler x reader #tttw

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queers-gambit · 6 months

Text

Tell Me Every Terrible Thing

[ part one of two ]

prompt: you embark on a secret but passionate affair with the Rogue Prince, and when his wife, Rhea Royce, passes away, he chooses you to wed next - a decision that angers his niece and changes history.

pairing: Daemon Targaryen x female!Hightower!reader only description given: red hair

fandom masterlist: House of the Dragon

word count: 5.6k+

note: what the fuck is this, Cherry? also two parts 'cause author gets carried away!

warnings: show spoilers, cursing, author has small bouts of feministic ideas, author also really likes the "little birds" storyline (let her live!), wonky brain is wonky, i think hurt and comfort, angst, very mild NSFW (brief female receiving oral), technically alternative timeline 'cause this goofy-ass author has an overactive imagination, #icanmakehimworse, another reader-episode-insert (this warning is for the fucking losers in my inbox).

part two: "Tell me every terrible thing you ever did, And Let Me Love You Anyway," - Edgar Allan Poe

"How angry do you think he'll be with me?"

You offered your best friend, The Realm's Delight, Crowned Heir to the Iron Throne, Princess Rhaenyra, a unamused, stale look. Sarcastically, you replied, "Oh, come now, Nyrie, why would your father be angry? It couldn't be because you rejected every suitor His Grace put before you, or even how you abruptly ended the tour with two months remaining. What father would be angry after that?"

She groaned, "I know, I know, you don't have to be so right all the bloody time. I just... I couldn't do it anymore, you saw what it was like," her head bowed and you knew the girl was truly overwhelmed by her 'job' picking a suitor.

"This was no easy feat to arrange, Princess," you spoke diplomatically, aware of the ship's crew dotting around the royal ship. "Our fathers went through much difficulty to ensure this tour's success, Princess, and I'd imagine neither will be thrilled by our early arrival."

"But it's just - "

"I know," you soothed with a knowing, sympathetic smile. Your arm extended around her, her head dropping to your shoulder for comfort. "In an ideal world, women would have a real say in their futures. Perhaps, that is what you're meant to do, Nyrie... Perhaps you're meant to break this wheel, give the other half of humanity a fighting chance against the men who have long suppressed us. Being heir is a monumental stereotype to shatter, but most women are not born into royalty and have nobody protecting or defending them."

She picked her head up to stare at you for a single moment, then nodded slowly, "That's a lot of pressure."

"Less if you pick a respectable man to help you lead," you advised softly, reaching to caress her cheek briefly. "You're to be Queen, Nyra, which means you need a King Consort that the common folk will respect, who will play his part in the courts to come. I know it's not ideal, my friend, but it's not meant to be - it's meant to be strategic." You paused, adding, "Similar to Ali marrying your father, yes? That was a strategic move on my father's end. Now it's up to you to chose your own match, to plot your own strategy."

"Who would you see me marry?"

"In truth? I'm unsure if anyone would fit the bill perfectly, so, I don't know who I could see you with. Definitely someone smart, though."

She only hummed, sighing deeply and making you frown. Before another word could be said, there came a distant screech that sounded all too familiar - though you refused to let it show that you knew this particular dragon's sound.

Nyra moved away from the ship's railing to stare longingly up into the sky, and about a minute later, without visible sight of any threat, Ser Criston Cole was shouting, "Take cover!"

And then, like a bird swooping to snatch a fish, a crimson dragon descended from the cover of clouds - seemingly materializing from nowhere. The large, long, slithery beast with wings knocked into the ship's main mast; jolting everyone on board enough to topple over.

You tried to stabilize the Princess, but you lost balance and dropped to your knees as Cole rushed to help Rhaenyra to her feet. When able, you looked to the sky; grinning to yourself as you recognized the retreating Blood Wyrm. Seeing the distinct form of Caraxes made you giddy with anticipation, however, that was short lived as you clocked Rhaenyra's gaze of awe and wonder.

It seems she was excited for her uncle's return, too. Though, it won't be till later that you learn the extent of her adoration.

Less than an hour later, the ship was docking and you escorted Princess Rhaenyra from aboard; her guards surrounding you both as you trekked to the Red Keep. "Just... Perhaps try to stay invisible," you advised your friend, arm-in-arm. "The King won't be pleased if you interrupt court, even just by being there. With luck, we won't be noticed."

She agreed softly, continuing on. She started fiddling with her necklace, the piece of Valyrian Steel jewelry that her uncle, Daemon, had gifted her years ago before Queen Aemma passed away. Your lover had told you the Princess was owed a piece of her Valyrian history, and since he could not gift a sword to a young lady, the necklace was chosen, crafted, and gifted.

When you returned to the Red Keep, it was just in time for court to be called to session and your friend was all too eager to join. "Nyra," you warned, hand in hers.

"It's all right," she assured, "come, it must be Daemon - "

"No, I should return to my chamber. Don't piss your father off too much," you warned her with a smirk, watching her grin in response, squeeze your hand, and then file into the Throne Room with the other members of court.

You retreated to your old room, sighing in relief when you discovered nothing was disturbed. "My Lady!" A voice gasped at the open door. You glanced over, smiling at Milah, your usual handmaiden, and opening your arms when she rushed forward. "You're not supposed to be back yet! Oh!" She tutted, looking you over. "I'll get your bed made and - "

"No, it's fine - "

"Nonsense, let me do this," she insisted, already busying around the room. "I was wondering why they were bringing things into the foyer - must be all the Princess' luggage, hmm?"

"Yeah," you sighed, helping her strip the bed and change the sheets. "It was strange," you admitted, "the men, I mean, and the way they all competed for her hand in marriage."

"Did you expect anything else?"

"I did not think they'd honestly kill one another. Though it was more so their pride than the Princess they fought over."

Milah smirked, "Sounds about right. Well, what of you? Anyone catch your eye?"

"Of course not," you sighed a little sadly.

"Still hung on the Prince, aren't you, my Lady?"

"Perhaps," you mused.

You spent the better part of an hour gossiping with Milah before she had to go grab a few things, but promised she'd send your belongings up as soon as possible. You thanked her, walked her out, assuring you were just going to get a bath or something, and just as you shut and locked your chamber door, gasped when a pair of hands seized your waist.

"Daemon!" You hissed when you saw the short, white locks of your surprise guest. "The bloody fuck is wrong with you?" You demanded, turning in his grip to shove your hands into his chest. "What're you doing here? Want to get us caught?"

"Three years," he grit, gathering you in his arms to heave upward and force your legs around his waist if you wanted to keep balance, "three fucking years I've been gone - away - missing you, do not deprive me a moment more."

"Someone will come looking," you whispered, caressing his face as your forehead met his. "And perhaps I want a moment to just look at you, 's been years," you breathed. "You cut your hair," you commented, running your hands through the short strands.

"I cut my hair," he agreed softly, just holding you close and tight.

"I like it... But I'll miss braiding it."

"I will, too," he admitted. He nuzzled closer, inhaling your neck sharply, boldly licking a flat tongue up your pulse point to make you shudder lightly.

"Daemon," you whispered, pulling his head back so you could look in his eyes, beaming, "I missed you, too."

"Viserys is arranging a lunch for my return," he informed, turning so he could approach your newly-made four-poster bed; dropping you flat on your back with a grin. "Which roughly translates into only allotting a few minutes to make up for lost time."

"We will have time later - "

"I overheard Viserys saying he and Otto intend to take evening tea with you regarding the Princess' return from tour," he eased, reaching to spread your legs, bunching your skirts. "But I will call upon you tomorrow? Yes? Officially?"

"If you insist," you teased, letting him finally descend to smash his lips against yours. In truth, you were used to his empty promises of 'calling on you officially' because of his marriage to Lady Royce, but it was his way of telling you without words that he wished it was you instead of Rhea.

Daemon groaned, melting into your form; breathing heavily. "I've missed you past words," he whispered, nuzzling your nose with his. "But for now, I just need a taste - "

"We don't have time - "

"We'll be fast. Tell me, love," he nipped your pouting lips, soothing his tongue over the puckered skin, "have you taken another in my absence?"

"Of course not," you hissed in offense.

"Good," he nodded, kissing you sweetly.

"Need I ask?"

"There were no concubines," he mused, "though, they were offered, I did not accept. So, we'll be quick - faster than quick," he promised, pawing at your undergarments and exposing your dampening cunt to his sight. "I'll take my time with you later, but for now, I need this," he all but seethed before diving tongue-first into your core.

His spit mixed with your arousal, creating a slippery mess.

"Shit," you hissed, grabbing his shorter hair as his tongue flattened to lap at your entrance, dripping in your essence. One of his hands held your thighs apart for his access, the other releasing his cock from the pair of breeches he wore. Daemon groaned at the taste of you, lapping wildly like a man starved, and stroking his bare cock in rhythm with his ministrations.

It truly took no time at all once he found your clit and sucked mercilessly, the hand holding your thighs now extended up to paw roughly at your tits. Alternating his tongue around your sloppy cunt added to your heightening pleasure, swirling his tongue as he bobbed and shook his head - making an absolute mess, and causing your climax to shatter your mind and soul.

Your legs twitched, spine curled, stomach contracted as your arms quivered from the rush of adrenaline; hand slapped over your mouth to keep your moans to a minimum. You grabbed his hair so tightly, he groaned in mock pain; legs then contracting to a suffocating grip around his ears and head while Daemon met his own end, spending in his hand whilst milking you for all you had.

He panted with satisfaction when he pulled back, grinning at you in mischief when you released your hold on him. "Good fuckin' girl," he praised, standing to his feet only to slither over top of you. "Like not a day's gone by, huh?" He whispered, kissing you messily, smearing your cum on your tongue; grinding his bare cock into your recovering core to make you shudder. "Take a moment, then get ready," he whispered. "I expect to see you at the celebrations... Wear that dress I got you for your fifth-and-twentieth nameday," he smirked, adding, "if you'd so please, my darling."

You chuckled, "You magically learned manners during the war?"

"Perhaps," he mused, pecking your lips again.

"Hey, Daemon?"

"What is it, my sweet one?" He asked, seeing the sincerity in your eyes and hearing the seriousness in your voice - something in his heart jumping.

"Would you tell me about it all later? The war, I mean? Would you tell me what you've endured?"

"I do not think it's a tale befitting a lady's ears."

"Please? I wish to know..."

"Then I will tell you," he promised, "but only if you wear that dress."

Your eyes rolled in humor as Daemon stood. You watched him wipe his cum on a spare rag, tossing it away, and after one last kiss, was leaving out of the secret passageway's door. Taking another moment, you finally stood on weak legs and unlocked the main door, preparing how you could for your day before Milah returned.

After arriving at the luncheon, you made a beeline for your father, greeting him happily before explaining your surprise reappearance. He filled you in on that day's court, explaining that Prince Daemon was back; and you felt almost guilty for the way your skin was still set ablaze from your lover's earlier visit.

For all Otto's faults, he was still your father, and you felt guilty for sneaking around with Daemon behind his back. Your father ushered you off to mingle, insisting he was only there for the King; and no, he wasn't hungry. So, you parted ways with a chaste peck to your forehead; the feeling of his scratchy beard lingering on your guilt-riddled flesh.

"Sister, what a surprise!" Alicent happily distracted by greeting you with a bright grin. You adjusted course to approach the Queen, King, and newly-returned Prince. "Oh, what a lovely dress you've chosen," she complimented with ease, reaching for your hand. "You always do have the best eye for clothes, I feel as if need you to live in my wardrobe, tell me what to wear everyday."

"Thank you, Your Grace, I'd be honored," You smiled at her, holding her hand, looking to the others. "My King," you curtsied to Viserys, glancing at Daemon and bowing your head respectfully, "my Prince, how nice to see you, again. Welcome home."

"Thank you, my Lady," he smirked. "Might I welcome you home as well? I hear you've been gone from the Capital."

You hummed with a nod, "I was on tour with the Princess, my Prince. I've only arrived home today, as well - though not by dragonback."

He eyed you up and down, offering, "I must agree with the Queen, my Lady, that is a lovely dress you've chosen."

You pet the black material, smiling genuinely, "Thank you, my Prince. It's one of my favorites."

"I can see why, given how beautiful you look," he flirted, and from behind you and Alicent, you could hear your father scoff.

"Thank you," you whispered. "What conversation did I rudely interrupt before?"

"Oh, nothing of importance," Daemon told you, looking to his brother and your sister.

"Because we spoke of how Daemon, here, was always Mother's favorite," Viserys grinned. "Do you want to know, my Lady? About how much Mother adored Daemon?" He asked you, his little brother trying to drone over him - but Viserys was determined to tell you the examples he could think of regarding his brother's favoritism.

You giggled from both Viserys' stories and Daemon's evident embarrassment.

However, almost awkwardly, on Alicent's other side, Princess Rhaenyra approached the group and stood amongst you. You knew the King must be unhappy with his daughter, but did not voice any opinion since you were not the source of disappointment at the moment. Instead, you listened to the King's complimenting words to his brother; thinking it was interesting that Daemon was so egotistical and yet, flushed under his brother's praise. Princess Rhaenyra waited until a natural lull to tell Daemon, "Congratulations on your victory."

It was awkward as Viserys just glared at her, Rhaenyra's expression falling short. Daemon covered smoothly, "Thank you, Princess."

Trying to save the tension, your sweet sister offered, "Perhaps Prince Daemon would care for a tour of the gallery? He hasn't yet seen the new tapestries gifted to you by Norvos and Qohor."

Viserys nodded and whispered, "Oh, oh," mockingly. He asked his brother, "Would you like to see the tapestries?" But by the end, he broke character and laughed with his brother; the latter who whom you knew spat on trivial things - such as tapestries and such. Through their laughter, Viserys proclaimed to his wife, "He has no interest in such things!"

"But thank you for the offer, sister," you smiled at her, trying to reassure her when her husband laughed in her face. "The tapestries are very beautiful, you've chosen a grand place to display them. I saw them on my way here."

"I'd like to see them," Rhaenyra jumped in, seemingly to Alicent's aid - something she'd not done in an age considering the tension between them. You just smiled politely, seeing the way Viserys dropped his grin when he looked at his daughter with distain while the rest of you looked away sheepishly.

"Then you should not deprive yourself."

Rhaenyra offered a pained, pursed smile, "I shall enjoy them alone."

You, Alicent, and Daemon all stared after Rhaenyra with varying degrees of pity as she walked away to sit solemnly by herself on a distant bench while Viserys went on about his and Daemon's youth; over Daemon being their mother's favorite. However, Alicent excused herself to follow the saddened Rhaenyra, perhaps to offer the Princess comfort in her father's anger. The King looked ready to protest, but instead just shook his head in disappointment.

Viserys turned you and Daemon away from the sight of the girls, showing off the Godswood in bloom; your father approaching you three stiffly. "Your Grace," he bowed to Viserys, then nodded in resepct, "my Prince. Daughter," he smiled, trying to instigate, "how was tour with Princess Rhaenyra?"

"Oh, as eventful as a Royal Tour can be," you smiled, deflecting, "though I must admit, while seemingly exciting at some parts, I'm sure it pales terribly in comparison to the Prince's adventures in the Stepstones." Viserys smirking broadly at your redirection. "I do wonder, what brought the war to an end? We've heard rumor, but surely the Prince might know for sure what brought the Triarchy down?"

"Surely," The King nodded, looking to Daemon expectedly.

The Rogue Prince smirked and readjusted his stance, deflecting, "Perhaps a conversation for later."

"Oh, come now, brother!"

"Your Grace," Otto interrupted, "I do apologize, but there are matters at hand that require your attention. The Tully's still - "

He sighed and waved your father off, "Yes, yes... Well," Viserys nodded, "I'll call upon you both later."

"Your Grace," you instantly curtsied.

"Your Grace," Daemon bowed right after. Viserys smiled and nodded back at you both, patted his brother's shoulder, turned, and when he walked away, Otto followed with a single look to you and Daemon.

"Daughter," he bid curtly - and you read between the lines. He really wanted to say, "Do not linger around the Prince."

When the King moved, his usual procession of advisors, guards, and entourage followed right after. You sighed as almost all of the Godswood cleared out, Daemon eyeing you as he readjusted his stance; subtly reaching out to pet your hand with his fingers.

"Daemon," you warned quietly.

"Nobody is watching us," he smirked. "You look beautiful, love. I'll have to buy you more dresses, you wear them so well."

"I cannot believe I will not see you tonight," you whispered with a pout.

"I will call on you tomorrow," he reminded.

You opened your mouth, but another voice answered. "Sister," Alicent called, you looking over and smiling innocently. You caught sight of Princess Rhaenyra glaring at her uncle, but didn't think much of it.

"I look forward to your tales from the Stepstones," you told him calmly, offering a curtesy.

He took your hand, pressing a soft kiss to the back, "I look forward to any time spect together, my Lady."

You hummed in contentment before stepping away, instantly taking Alicent's arm when close enough. "What was that about? Daemon looks so smitten!" She whispered with a growing grin.

"He was being polite," you whispered back, "and simply being Daemon - you know how he is. He's got three years of mischief to make up for."

"I see," she giggled. "He's quite handsome with the short hair, isn't he? It suits him well."

"I have to agree," you gossiped. "I can see why the ladies of court have missed him so."

Your younger sister giggled, smiling at you, offering, "I've missed you greatly. Come... I wish to hear of your time away."

"Oh, sister, please, I've only just returned."

"But... Wouldn't you tell me before the King?" She whispered.

You paused, then nodded, "Got me there, sister-dearest."

"We'll take tea together," she decided, leading you around the Keep until she saw a familiar face she knew. "Talya, my sister and I wish to take tea in the gardens, please. Privately, of course, so do not announce it," she directed the handmaiden. "We'll be in the gazebo in the rose gardens, bring tea, sandwiches, and my sister's always loved those peach crumbles?"

"I know the dessert," she nodded, smiling at you. "Can I interest you, Your Grace, in anything specific?"

"No, but bring enough for us both. Come, sister."

You three parted ways, Alicent leading you to the gardens as promised. She dismissed anyone in the area, even telling her guards to wait at the front hedges to give you ideal privacy while deeper in the roses at the gazebo. While sitting, you exchanged gossip about what happened while you were away, Alicent happy to catch you up because she was happy to finally have a friend, even if it were a sister, back in her corner.

You were happy, too.

While you loved Rhaenyra, the tension between her and Ali made you feel in the middle despite both parties assuring you "you weren't". Nyra was a good friend, your best, even! But it was something about your sister that was calming and assuring. She was trustworthy to a fault, but she was still your strongest pillar.

As Talya dressed your table with tea, lemon water, sandwiches, fruits, and other foods (including the peach crumbles), you giggled at Ali's retelling of whatever failed proposals occurred this past season you were away. When alone, at last, Ali turned to you in her padded chair and asked, "Tell me in truth, how was the tour? Why did you return early?"

"In truth, sister, vying men made the Princess uncomfortable. She did not need the two months more, she knew she was unhappy with the men so far presented to her."

Alicent sighed, "So, who does she intend to marry?"

"Yes," a new voice agreed, you both jumping in shock and looking up to see Viserys approaching with your father behind him. "Who does my daughter intend to wed, Lady Hightower?"

"Your Grace," you uttered, both you and Alicent standing in respect to bow your heads.

"Please, please," he permitted you both to sit, taking the lone chair across the table as your father remained standing. "I only wish for the unfiltered truth. I know what is said, I know what is reported, I know..." He sighed, "I know what my daughter might say, but please, Lady Hightower, what is the truth of it?"

"The truth, Your Grace, is that Rhaenyra was overwhelmed. Perhaps it was too long for her that she eventually, I'm not sure, shut down? She did not care towards the end which men was presented, she was overwhelmed with the options and pace at which everything moved."

"Kings and Princes before her have done the same, many Queens and Princesses embarking on their tours to find proper suitors," Otto reminded. "Why was this different, my Lady?"

"Because she is the first," you reminded. "Never before has a woman been named heir - she holds a different responsibility. Perhaps having everything thrown at her was too much, she has to filter through lesser men that would be King Consort. Nobody stood out, she became discouraged, and honestly, Your Grace?" You spoke earnestly, "I think it just made her sad. She did not want to disappoint you by choosing a man not worthy of being her King, so, she would rather face your anger in coming home early."

Alicent frowned but nodded to herself.

Otto adverted his eyes.

Viserys looked dejected, but sighed, "I see... Thank you for your words, my Lady, truly, you've always been a trustworthy advisor to the Queen, Princess, and I."

"It's the least I can do, Your Grace, since you and Queen Aemma - you - you were so kind to me when Mother passed. And Rhaenyra - to both Alicent and I - she was a true friend. I am in debt to you, Your Grace, and whatever I can do, be it just a simple different perspective, I am happy to provide."

"Well," he considered, "in the spirit of your unfiltered perspective, who would you see Rhaenyra marry?"

You blinked in shock, "Oh, Your Grace, I-I am not qualified to say."

"You serve as my Master of Whispers, do you not?" He smirked. "Speak, please."

You sighed deeply. With a small gulp, you blinked twice, then admitted, "I do not think my opinion matters, but... It would make sense to marry her to Ser Laenor Velaryon, would it not? He's a warrior who survived the Stepstones, is of Valyrian stock and blood, rides the dragon, Seasmoke. He's kind, brave, true, unmarried, heir to Driftmark. I think when it comes to filling the position of King Consort, Ser Laenor Velaryon would make a fine candidate."

Apparently, this was all Viserys needed to hear.

You could not sleep that night. You could not explain why, but something foul was in the air and prevented you from drifting off. So, you chose to browse your private library, select a literary favorite, and stroll the deadened halls of the Red Keep; reading by flickering torch light.

Good thing you were up and out, because one of your Little Birds chirped at you from the shadows. You looked around to see nobody in the hall, but another chirp directed your attention to a darkened alcove. "Hmm, oh, Kaela," you hummed, approaching her slowly and bending at the waist. "What is it, child?"

"I came as fast as I could."

"What's wrong?"

"I've seen something - something you'll want to know," she glanced up and down the hall, "but not anyone else."

"Come," you whispered, pushing her further back into the dark and sheltering yourselves safely. Once knelt before her, you asked the child, "All right. What is it you have seen, little one?"

"Do not get angry, my Lady..."

"I promise I won't," you spoke softly, confused - you never got angry at your Little Birds... Why start now?

"I-I saw... I saw the Prince Daemon and... Princess Rhaenyra."

You nodded slowly, asking quietly, "Where?"

"In the city, in a pleasure house."

You blinked, "And what were they doing?"

"What grown-ups do."

"I see. They were coupling?"

She shrugged, "No, just kissing, but it stopped fast. He left her there."

"He left her there? In the pleasure house?"

The little girl nodded. "The Prince looked sad... When the Princess tried to kiss him again, he pulled away... Then he left."

"Where did he go? After?"

She blinked, frowning, "My brother, Grenn, said he saw him at the pubs - but he was always on the move, very drunk. I came here right away."

"Good girl," you smiled, offering her whatever Gold Dragons from the pouch you usually kept on your person under your robe for times like this. "Where will you be tomorrow evening? I will bring you and Grenn supper."

She smiled, "We can meet you at the dock!"

"The dock?"

"He likes watching the boats."

"The docks, then. By the Fisherman's Pier?"

"No, Grenn like the Harper's Pier. They're not there around supper, they're still out at sea."

"Harper's Pier for supper," you agreed. "Go on."

The little girl looked around before scampering off down a different passageway and you stood from your knelt position with a stony look of tentative contemplation on your face. With a deep breath, you did the only thing you thought you could... You went to your father.

With a rapid knock at his chamber door, it took a moment or two before he was opening it - still dressed. "What is it, daughter?" He asked gruffly. "It's late, this should wait till morning."

"The castle is about to wake - "

"I know and I've much to attend to - "

"Father," you hissed, glancing up the hall.

He sighed and let you in, "What is it?"

"I carry scandalous news," you muttered, his door's lock echoing around you. "About the Princess Rhaenyra."

He turned to you sharply, you taking a step back in surprise. "You... Know?"

"About her sneaking around in a pleasure house?"

Otto frowned, "Do you know with who?"

You could not tell him, so you answered, "No, just that she was seen in disguise."

"Who told you this?"

"One of my Birdies."

"All right," he decided, nodding to himself, "thank you, daughter, for reporting this. I will... I will figure out what to say to the King."

"Should you say anything?"

"I'll figure it out - but now we both know."

You nodded, "So you knew before I came?"

"I was awoken an hour ago to hear this news."

You nodded slowly, "Then I will leave you to it."

"Thank you," he whispered, letting you peck his cheek in parting before slipping out of his chambers. With nothing left to do or anything else to say, you went back to your chambers as to limit your exposure to the castle's tenants.

The less that could say they saw you this night, the better.

Once safe in your chambers with a locked main door, you could do nothing else but (over)think, wishing to all the Seven Gods you didn't know what you knew. Information and knowledge was vital to maintain power, this is true, but it also made you dangerous - also a target. The more you knew, the bigger the target.

It was only a few hours after dawn when the secret passage doors to your chamber opened. You were braiding your hair, ignoring the man you knew to have the only balls to use that door - especially now.

"I've always wondered, if we had children, would they have white hair or waves of fire, like you? Perhaps something between?"

"Fuck off, Daemon."

"So, you've heard," he sighed deeply. "Won't you even look at me?"

"I can't stand the very thought of you right now, nor the actual sound, I'll lose my stomach if I have to look at you."

"Let me tell you the truth," he begged, "before I have to leave the Keep, let me tell you the truth. Let Viserys and everyone have their ideas and opinions, their lies and slander, but let me tell you!"

"Excuse me?" You asked, whirling around in your seat to glare at him fully. "Viserys banished you, again?"

"He did... Back to the Vale."

You scoffed, "Good... Your Lady wife awaits you."

"Viserys thinks I've sullied Rhaenyra's virtue. I do not need you thinking the same, so, please, let me tell you what happened - no matter how uncomfortable, please, let me tell you the truth."

"What difference does it make?"

"I can't have you thinking something more occurred. Was I tempted? Yes, but I refrained. Did I touch her? A little - but not how you think."

You sighed, shaking your head, "I don't care, you're returning to your wife in the Vale, and I will be rid of you. No matter for how long this time, you will be gone - "

"For a time, yes, but I intend to return for you."

"No, I think I'll let Father make me a match. I despised the North, it was too cold, so the handsome Cregan Stark is out. I don't mind Dorne, perhaps a Martel to marry? Or even a Tully of Riverrun?"

"Do not speak such atrocities to me."

"You're one to talk! Your niece, Daemon? The girl I consider my closest friend? You couldn't just find that whore you like and be satisfied with her? Couldn't wait a single day, could you? Huh? How fucking pathetic!"

"Perhaps you are not as close with Rhaenyra as you thought," he tisked, making you feel disarmed. He spent the next hour and a half explaining to you what happened the previous night, and despite your disgust, you just listened.

Knowledge was power.

"I will return," he sighed at the end, "and in that time, you can make your own decisions if you want me or not. But I will return and I will have you, if you will have me, and this foolishness will be behind us."

"I'll give you a single year. I will not wait for you longer than that," you whispered, tears streaming down your face. "I can't stand that you've done this, but I will wait one single year for you to find a way out of your marriage and back to me. Any longer than that, and I will simply move on. I do not want to live my whole life in the Red Keep, and the truth of it is, I cannot live in the Princess' shadow any longer. One year, Daemon."

"One year," he nodded, stepping closer. "My love, please - "

"Do not assume to touch me. Not after you've touched her," you snapped, stepping away. "Get out, I need to be alone, you have been banished - you need to go, you cannot be seen here." Your eyes rolled, muttering, "Probably have to go collect your whore for this banishment, too."

"Not this time," he smirked, "this time, I leave with my promise that I will return for you, my sweet Lady Hightower."

"Fuck off, you perverted Prince Daemon," you sassed, watching him slip out the door; shutting you in an echoing silence. Your heart ripped itself apart, making you wonder what the fuck you had done to deserve getting caught in such a scandalous affair. But you knew, in your heart, you'd do anything for Daemon - the thought sickening your stomach as you pondered how far this would all go.

requesting rules and masterlist

HOTD masterlist

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mionemymind · 1 month

Text

Lost in the Universe (Part 1)

Summary: Y/n is transported to a different universe and by chance, meets the Wanda that inhabits it.

Warnings: Fluff, Cursing, Slight Angst?

A/n: I know I haven't written in a while. But recently I've been on a surge to start writing again. I hope you all enjoy and please tell me honestly how you feel about it. Hopefully, I'm not too rusty.

Word Count: 1.6k

Masterlist

Part 2

Y/n dropped into a new universe, barely landing on her feet. She scrambled to find balance as the portal above her closed. “What the fuck?” Y/n wiped off her hands as she looked around the unfamiliar area.

“Are you lost dekta?” Y/n spun around at the sound of her voice. A smile plastered on Y/n’s face when she saw Wanda. She took a couple of steps when she felt something was different with the girl in front of her. “Wanda?”

The brunette chuckled at the obvious confusion. “It’s me dekta.” Y/n still grew apprehensive. She looked around the location she was in. They were on a simple farm surrounded by acres of grape trees. There was a barn and home in the distance and sheep and cows grazed the plain. “I don’t think you’re my Wanda though,” Y/n said as kindly as possible. It was scary to be in a new world without a clue as to how they operate. Even though Y/n knew that the woman in front of her wasn’t exactly her Wanda, it still gave her some type of peace knowing there was a version of her here.

“And you’re not my Y/n.” Y/n’s nerves eased with the comment as Wanda broke the distance between them. “So let’s get you back to my home and figure out how this happened.”

“Make yourself at home.” Wanda took off her dirty boots at the front and walked to the kitchen. She took the kettle out from the drawer and filled it with water. “I’ll make you some hot chocolate. Is that your favorite in your world?”

“It is!” Y/n yelled from the front of the house. She took off her shoes and jacket, hoping to not get the house dirty. The entrance of the house led them into a decent-sized living room filled with various decorations and plants.

Y/n didn’t mean to snoop but she couldn’t help but look at all the photos framed on the wall and tables. The first photo that caught her eye was a picture of young Wanda and Pietro back in what Y/n could guess was their hometown. She picked it up and analyzed it in detail.

“I miss him,” Y/n whispered to herself. Wanda noticed this as she walked in with two cups of hot chocolate. “We were only five in that photo. I think we went to the zoo that day. Probably one of our better pictures when we were younger. Everything else is either him or me or the both of us crying.”

“If you don’t mind me asking,” Wanda nodded for approval, “is your Pietro still alive?” Wanda could sense this was a sensitive subject and gave Y/n one of the cups while directing her to the couch.

“Yes, my Pietro is still alive. Currently, he’s away on work.” Y/n gave a small smile, the feeling of missing Pietro grew inside. “I’m happy to hear that.” Y/n took a small sip of her hot chocolate, making sure not to spill the hot drink on herself.

“So your Y/n likes hot chocolate?” Wanda smiled in agreement. “Yes, my Y/n does like hot chocolate. She’s the only reason I have some. I’m just glad that part of her is with you as well. I hope it finds you comfort though because it must be scary to be in a completely different universe.”

“Well,” Y/n thought maybe lying would help ease her anxiety, but the presence of Wanda, even though it wasn’t necessarily her Wanda, made her want to tell the truth, “it is scary. I’m just hoping they find me. But you have been pretty calm for this whole ‘I managed to drop on your farm out of all the locations in this universe’ thing.”

“Your humor appears to be the same no matter the universe,” Wanda playfully said. “But the reason I’m not freaking out is because in this universe, I’m aware of my other counterparts. Luckily enough, you dropped into a universe where I have my powers.” Wanda proceeded to show off her magic, covering Y/n in red swirls momentarily.

“Are you able to drop me back home?” Wanda politely smiled, setting her cup down on the table nearby. “I’m sorry dekta. I unfortunately don’t have that type of power as of yet.”

Y/n sighed in defeat, her anxiety coming back with worried thoughts. Wanda reached out and grabbed Y/n’s hand in a comforting manner. Even in different universes, Wanda Maximoff cared for Y/n Y/l/n. This was a simple fact that would not change. “However, your Wanda is currently on the hunt for you.”

“She is?” Y/n placed her cup down, her hand still interlaced with Wanda’s. “The rules of the universe don’t allow any conversation to happen between each other but we can still feel each other. So when you dropped into my world, I could feel the slight imbalance. But, you just happen to be dating one of the most powerful people in the universe.” Y/n blushed at the compliment, already knowing that she was lucky to even date Wanda in the first place.

“And the perk of dating powerful people is that we can feel other things in different universes. Right now, I can feel her dropping into other universes, trying her best to find you.”

“What if she can’t find me?” Y/n pouted. Wanda smiled even more. It was refreshing to see that their love expanded beyond her world. Wanda cupped Y/n’s cheek with her free hand, “This is something I will share only with you.” Listening intently, “You and your Wanda have a special connection. Think of it as a tether. Right now, she’s tugging on that tether hoping that if she continues to pull on it, it will lead back to you. No amount of magic, power, or science can cause this tether to break. It might be a little tangled with how many universes you might’ve accidentally gone through, but she will reach you in time.”

“So believe me when I say this dekta, Wanda will always find you.” Wanda kissed Y/n’s forehead and proceeded to get up. “In the meantime, my Y/n is away on a mission. You’re free to stay here with me until all of this gets sorted out.”

Wanda walked back to the front of the house, putting her shoes back on. “Is there anything I can do to help out while I wait?”

“Wanna help me with the goats?”

After a long day of work, Wanda and Y/n lay in the hammock near the campfire, admiring the stars that the night offered. “When I looked at your photos, I noticed none of them were of just you and I, how come?”

Wanda blushed at the directness and was thankful that it was nighttime. “You see, my Y/n and I aren’t dating yet.” Y/n faced Wanda with a ridiculous look. “Are you serious? How come I haven’t confessed? If there’s a world where there’s a you and an I, then we must be together.”

“I’m not sure. We bought this farm together to get away from the city and have some peace time before they spring our next mission on us. Even then, she doesn’t seem to have the courage to confess.” Wanda sighed, her patience was running thin but she knew it was worth the wait.

“Do you need me to get myself together?” Wanda laughed at the offer, clearly imagining two Y/n’s talking to each other. “I’ll probably be the one to have to confess first if she doesn’t do it soon.”

“Just to be sure, does the Y/n here like you like that?”

“Oh, I’m more than positive that my Y/n likes me back,” Wanda cockily states.

“What makes you so certain? Back then, it took me forever to confirm that my Wanda even liked me.”

“Cause within our tethers, I can feel her. I’ve only ever felt her. The universe wouldn’t be so cruel to tie me to her if she didn’t feel the same way.” There was more to the truth than Wanda could let on, because in every universe, Y/n and Wanda always fall in love with each other, no matter the circumstances, no matter the era, and no matter the time.

“I didn’t know the universe could be kind like that.”

They continued to star watch when a red portal in the sky opened up and out came two figures. One landed roughly as the other descended slowly onto the ground. Y/n and Wanda got up from their hammock and walked towards them.

“Wanda?” Y/n yelled out in the distance, hoping it was them and not an alien invasion. “Y/n?!” Wanda came rushing into Y/n’s arm, feeling her worries slip away as she finally was with her again. “I thought I lost you,” Wanda stated with worry. Today had been a long day for her and America Chavez. Hopping from universe to universe was hard, especially with a young teen that has no clue how to control her powers.

“You could never lose me,” Y/n stated confidently. Wanda pulled back from the hug and sealed a kiss, one that made both of their knees weak and minds numb with love. Pulling away slowly, pressing their foreheads against each other, Wanda said, “Let's go home dekta.”

Y/n nodded in agreement and intertwined their hands. They walked back to the portal but not before Y/n waved goodbye to this universe’s Wanda. “I hope she confesses soon!”

Wanda smiled back in return and waved. Telepathically, Wanda said, “Thank you for taking care of my Y/n.”

“Anytime, Wanda.”

Part 2

Taglist: @halobaby @arelyitsherec8 @blackxwidowsxwife @cristin-rjd @madamevirgo @trikruismybitch @paradiselost916 @mmmmokdok @morbid-gaymer @dailyavengering @itsnottilly @helloalycia @randomshyperson @tomy5girls @daenerys713 @ensorcellme @lezzzbehonesthere @imagine-reblog @sighsam @olsensnpm @tquick99 @feolok @emilyprentisslittlewhore @mvddison99 @iamapotato @shadowybailiffdreamer-donkey @yuhloversxx @mjaudrey @upsidedowndanvers @somewhatgreatexpectations @wandavixen @second-try-stevie @magicallymaximoff @username23345 @coollemonsaresour @littlewinchester15 @aimezvousbrahms @afuckingshituniverse @am-just-a-cosmic-joke-to-me @ohmygooddamnbisexualmood @diaryoflife @s7uts @newyork1432 @the-anxious-stargazer @hello-mtf @marvelousbelladonna @ima-gi–na-tion @obsessed-with-wandamaximoff @the-camilucha @itsnottilly @171611 @kaitlynroseb @daisybri7 @drpepperobsessed @bemyvitamin @musicinourlips @marvelousbelladonna @gingerbreadcookieforlife @xastrydx @chasethemoon @naixia00 @lostandsearching @stupidsapphicsstuff @haechanana @the-camilucha @severepeanutartisanhands @owloftheshadows @somewhatgreatexpectations @ywuen @mixed-fandom-mess @loomontoia @ilovemarvelwomen @isitallreallyworthit @coxmicbabygirl @cyanide-mustard @mrs-avenger3000 @prentisshoe @andrea-stark @simpforwandanat @abimess @randomshyperson @yourtaletotell @magically-queer-stuff @imapotatao @iliketozoneout @maximoffbrossupremacy @olsensnpm @psychadelichues @whitelotus00

A/n: I just used the same tag list from Fake Memories. If you didn't want to be tagged, I'm sorry.

#wanda maximoff x reader #wanda x reader #fluff #lost in the universe #marvel #wanda maximoff fluff

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foxy-eva · 8 months

Text

Wild Honey

Summary: Reader gets emotional during sex with Spencer

Request: Spencer dicks down Reader so good it makes her emotional. Then lots of fluff with aftercare (originally requested to @imagining-in-the-margins)

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader

Category: Smut, Fluff

Content Warning: (18+, minors DNI) crying (happy tears), praising, implied breeding kink, unprotected penetrative sex, aftercare

Word Count: 1.1k

Masterlist

The color of Spencer's irises reminded you of wild honey, so warm and alluring when he looked at you. His lips captured yours as he hovered over you, letting you taste the sweetness of his kiss.

Being with him truly was one of life’s greatest pleasures.

You whined when his mouth left yours, only to be soothed by the sensation of him caressing your neck. Gently, he kissed and licked over sensitive skin until you couldn’t think about anything else than being one with him.

"I love you," he whispered right before your bodies merged.

There was no need for you to speak those words for him to know that you loved him, too.

"Spencer!" You moaned instead.

With a smirk spread over his face, he purred, "I know, it feels so good."

He took his time entering you, relishing the sensation of your walls enveloping him. You shared your body with him without any resistance, almost feeling greedy to feel all of him. When he was at your deepest point you could feel both of your hearts beating inside of you. Just for a moment you had to close your eyes to let this moment enter your memory, to be able to cherish it forever.

When you locked eyes with him once more, his pupils had almost completely swallowed the warm amber of his irises. His cheeks were flushed and his lips slightly parted when he slowly began moving. Even with his weight on top of you it felt like you might start floating at any moment now.

Spencer knew your body better than you did, so it was no surprise that he had you dancing along the edge of euphoria with just a few skilled motions. The sounds of your pleasure fell from your lips as he pushed into you and he became eager to hear even more of them.

"You're doing so good, my love," he praised you. "Are you gonna come for me?"

"Yes!"

With your arms and legs wrapped around him there was no distance allowed between your bodies. Spencer found your neck to bite on your pulse point, eliciting the most enticing sound he had ever heard from you. It all became too much for you to handle, it felt like you might drown in the love you had for him.

When he kissed your cheek he could suddenly taste the ocean on your skin. In an instant he stopped moving and propped himself up on his arms only to find saline droplets spilling from your eyes.

"Please don't stop," you whimpered as you wiped your tears away. "I'm so close."

"Oh my sweet girl," he cooed. "Are those happy tears?"

A bright smile formed on your face while you nodded. "You make me feel so good."

"You have no idea how much I adore you," Spencer breathed as he kissed one of your tears away.

You began grinding your hips against his and demanded, "Show me."

He met your motions with his own thrusts, moving with you in perfect synchronicity to guide you into the sensation of pure bliss. Your lips were attached to his, your kiss only interrupted by the moans and sighs escaping your throat.

With one particular hard thrust he finally pushed you over the edge, your entire body trembling as your walls began pulsing around his hardness.

When you came down from your high he whispered against your lips, "Good girl."

Once he was sure you could take it, he accelerated his pace again, now chasing his own climax. You moved with him, watching his face intently as he got lost in the pleasure.

"You feel so good," he groaned when you clenched around him. "So tight for me."

"Please, Spencer!"

He knew what you were asking for, aware of what it was you needed from him. When he shared his essence with you, you moved with him until he had nothing left to give. The warmth Spencer provided spread through your entire body and you couldn't stop smiling at the thought that the love you two shared could one day grow into something more.

“I love you,” you cooed and welcomed him inside your arms.

He kissed away the stray tears he still found on your cheek before he buried his face into the crook of your neck. You held him tightly against your body until he had caught his breath enough to whisper, “I love you more.”

Your bodies were still connected and you fought against letting him go but he slipped out of you eventually. Spencer got up from the bed and offered you a hand to follow him into the bathroom. He motioned for you to sit on the edge of the bathtub while he ran some warm water over a washcloth.

When he kneeled before you, he gently parted your legs to get access to your center. He let the washcloth run along the insides of your thighs and followed it with his lips, kissing every inch of your soft skin the piece of fabric had touched. There was the utmost tenderness in his motions when he reached your folds, ridding you of the remains of your shared desire. He took care of you, cleaning your body as if it was some sacred ritual. In a way it was.

Once he was done with that he set the damp fabric aside to continue with his kisses. He let his lips move along the apex of your thigh until your hands flew to his unruly curls, tugging on them until he tilted his head to lock eyes with you. He looked up at you like you were some kind of deity and he was ready to worship you.

“Spencer, what are you doing?” You snickered when he wanted to bury his face between your legs again.

“Showing you how much I adore you.”

When he got too close to your core, you shied away from him, still sensitive from your previous high. He got up from the floor to place a soft kiss on your lips before asking, “Are you feeling okay?”

“Yes,” you reassured him. “I just want to be close to you.”

Spencer took your hand in his to guide you back to the bed. Gently, he pushed you onto the mattress just to join you seconds later. You found your home inside his arms with your head resting on his chest. His fingertips began dancing over your back, drawing soothing patterns on your skin as he pushed his body further against yours.

You turned your head to find the wild honey of his eyes again, longing for the warmth they radiated. Gratitude washed over you when you realized how much sweeter your life had gotten since you met Spencer.

Taglist: @nomajdetective @reidsbookclub @gspenc @justreadingficsdontmindme @samuel-de-champagne-problems @matthew-gray-gubler-lover @malindacath @pauline5525mgg @sanaz1dlol @luredwithpretzels @reidselle @alexxavicry @frickin-bats @spencersprettyslut @sebs-oxygen @beepbooptoop @lovejules888 @encyclo-reid-ia @lilibet261 @fandomstuffff @spencer-reid-wonderland @happymangospot @conniesanchor @reaux02 @ellamaianderson @cynbx @dashneydanger @melifluorei-d @bitchassbecky691 @iameternallylonely @hotchandspencearedilfs @kobaltdragon @amititties @castiels-majestic-wings @torigorie @emiliaserpe @thenerdthatwrites @reidtopia @velvetthunder93 @cncoxlifeline @jordie-gvf-admin @saturnstringz @missabsey @spencerslove @guacam011y @whoopdy-doo @hugyourlungs

#spencer reid #spencer reid smut #spencer reid fluff #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid x reader #criminal minds #criminal minds smut #criminal minds fluff #criminal minds fanfic #criminal minds fanfiction

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cambion-companion · 1 year

Note

How woud Aemond react to his wife cheating... in chess?

Every time he looks away, she steals a piece off of the board and just smiles when he looks back at her. Like she isn't even trying to win she's just doing this to mess with him a little

Oh wow, I found another drunk drabble prompt! Thank you Anon, this is a hilarious follow up to the message I answered "How would Aemond react to his wife cheating" haha

Aemond x wife!reader | tipsy reader | cheating at chess | Aemond indulging his lady, teasing ensues

"It's your turn, Y/N."

You continued sipping on your wine, your mind already fuzzy from the drink, swirling the bitter liquid around in your mouth as you studied the chessboard in consternation.

Aemond sat back in his chair, his lips pressed together as he watched you with a mixture of impatience and amusement.

He opened his mouth to say something else, but you held up a hand to shush him. "I'm thinking."

"A demanding endeavor, it seems."

"I'm not losing to you again, Aemond."

"Perhaps more wine would help." He smirked, catching your eye as you shot him a withering look, taking another deliberate swig from your goblet.

"Fine." You moved your rook forward several spaces.

You winced as Aemond immediately took your piece with his knight. "Fuck."

"Check."

You groaned, holding the rim of your cool glass against your aching temple.

A servant bearing more drink arrived, drawing away your husband's attention for a few crucial moments. You reached forward, surreptitiously removing Aemond's own rook from the board and stowing it in the cushions beside you. "Ah, thank you." You beamed at the servant as he refilled your cup.

Aemond was studying his board with a raised brow, his violet eye flicked up to your studiously neutral expression. "Your move, Y/N."

"Oh yes, of course."

This went on several more minutes; you losing your pieces to Aemond's keen strategizing and him losing his own pieces whenever he was sufficiently distracted enough for you to steal them.

As Aemond turned his head to observe a group of guards moving across the hall, you tried to take away his queen without him taking notice. Long fingers caught your wrist as Aemond turned swiftly back to you, aware the whole time of your ruse. He pulled you toward him, unseating you and causing you to tumble onto his lap, scattering the remaining pieces across the board.

"You tried to take my queen?" He rolled his eye, snorting a short laugh. "You do know cheating at chess is nigh impossible."

"I'm the only queen you need, my king." You giggled, feeling his dexterous fingers begin probing at the ticklish part of your sides.

Your face was flushed from the wine and the sudden proximity of the Targaryen prince you called husband.

Aemond sighed, hoisting you so you were more securely seated against him. "I've always thought it interesting the queen is the one with the most power over the board." You watched him with soft adoration as he continued his musing. "She is the one with the most power to protect the king."

"I'd protect you with my life too." You nuzzled into the crook of his neck, feeling the low vibration of his chuckling, his grip on you tightening slightly.

"My ember." Aemond said affectionately into your hair before placing a gentle kiss to your crown.

The warmth of his arms encircling you combined with the heady heat of the wine caused your eyes to droop with sleepy contentment. "Take me to bed, Aemond." You murmured, your lips brushing the soft skin of his neck.

"As my lady commands." He rose with you in his arms, your arms coming to grip around his shoulders as he strode toward your chambers. "Remind me to not play chess with you while you're drinking."

"You're just a sore loser." You smiled, kissing his temple. "My strategizing prowess is clearly too much for you to handle."

"Hmm." Was your terse answer, Aemond shaking his head in fond bemusement as he carried you to bed.

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cheriladycl01 · 5 months

Text

My love, is mine all mine - Max Verstappen x Norris! Reader x Charles Leclerc Part 2

Plot: Norris' Twin sister is also a driver in the 2021 line up and is in her rookie era. Not only do the commentators struggle to now talk about the pair in the race, but they also struggle to talk about talent. What happens when two drivers find her eye-catching.

Credit to countingstars-17 for the GIF

After you'd spent the week at home you travelled to France, you asked McLaren to set you in a different hotel from the other drivers. You found one that was cheaper and still within a decent distance from the race track.

Your sisters in your groupchat that didn't have your bothers in, had texted you telling you Lando was getting worried you wouldn't be showing up for this race. It was Thursday and normally drivers would come to the paddock for media duties but when he came it was just him doing stuff for the F1 YouTube and being pestered by the McLaren social media teams for content.

"Zac where is she, you guys wont tell me and I'm worried she wont be here for practice which starts in 20 minutes!" Lando asks Zac whose in sat in hospitality having a pre-race coffee.

"As far as I'm aware, she's already in her car getting ready for the practice session ... so I'd get yourself down there now so you can get a good time Lando" he smiles, Lando rushed to the garage Zac slowly trailing behind him, wanting to get to the garage to get a set of headphones and sit with the race engineers.

"Y/N can you hear?" you hear through your in ears.

"Loud and clear, let me know when i can leave the pit" you say shuffling down in your seat to test the pedals.

"Nico, the pedals are feeling a little stiff, its like there's no traction" you complain as your directed out onto the pit lane.

"Okay, just do a slow lap, testing the breaks and make sure the throttle is all okay. Then we'll see if we need to bring the car in quickly before a flying lap.

As you'd gone round on a normal lap, it was determined that there was an issue with the breaks, the minute you'd tried to do the flying lap your car had major under steer. You'd managed to keep it out the gravel but you had spun out. You were called back to the pits and only placed P16.

You slammed your wheel onto the bonnet, and the engineers all immediately started to work on your car. You talked with them helping them out.

You spied Lando's car in the corner of your eyes being pulled into his half of the garage.

"Y/N hey" he says jumping out the car pulling him helmet off.

"Kinda busy trying to fix this trash can of a car right now Lando, later" you say not even sparing him a glance. Grumbles come from the mechanics making you whisper an apology as they jokingly scowl at you.

Was it petty that you weren't speaking to your brother, yes.

Was it petty that you were trying to get him to have a spoon of his own medicine for the way he'd treated you in Azerbaijan, yes.

Were you going to stop right now? Nope!

"Oh, erm okay well I'm going to go grab something to eat before the next practice" he smiles.

"Cool" you nod a smile, before kneeling down pointing something out to the mechanic that didn't look quite right.

"I'll be back in a bit, will the car be ready for FP2?" you ask.

"Should be, just needs some greasing and tightening. Trust us you'll be flying out there in no time!" the head mechanic says and you smile nodding softly before walking out towards the rest of the motorhomes.

You walked past, shyly waving to the drivers she encountered. Sky had seen her but were already busy interviewing Christian Horner and Toto Wolff who were currently talking about the championship this year and Mercedes rough start to the season in Bahrain.

"Y/N?" a voice asks from a table outside the Red Bull hospitality.

"Oh! Max, hey how have you been" you exclaim crossing over the Sky cameras who unbeknownst to you followed you for later review. You pull him into a hug, happy to finally see someone on the grid who hadn't upset you in the last few weeks.

"I'm good but i think the actual question is, are you okay?" he asks rubbing up and down your arm.

"Yeah, I just don't really know how to even talk to Lando about all of this, he's never not been there for an achievement of mine up until now. The team's strategy was shit, and I got us more points passing Lando, i was on the fresher tires, I had DRS i don't understand why they wouldn't want me to overtake" you complain, you really genuinely couldn't understand it.

It wasn't like this in Formula 2.

"You'll come to learn, that people don't like being my team-mate because im golden boy. I was the hot shot that Horner took a gamble on and he won jackpot. It's never easy being the second driver on a team to a golden boy" he advises, making you look down tears in your eyes.

Is that all Zac thought of you? The secondary to your golden boy hot shot brother.

Well that just wouldn't fly, you'll show them that your made of more and that you are worthy of sharing the seat with your brother.

"You know, keep it up Schat, Horner's been keeping an eye on you. So have Mercedes and Ferrari" Max whispers leaning in and holding your waist. You gasp as he leans back looking at you nodding before wandering off and into the Red Bull motorhome.

You check your phone for the time seeing that you really should make your way back to the McLaren garage to see if your car is ready.

"We didn't talk" you hear from behind you and a hand grabs your wrist and pulls you back to them.

Charles

"I don't want to talk to you Charles" you grunt shrugging his arm off.

"Why not?" he asks looking over you.

"I think you know why, just concentrate on FP2 Charles" you say, for the first time you see a sort of desperation in his eyes. It's almost as if he came here with the intention to say something to you, but he also doesn't want to admit it.

"Y/N... wait" he starts again but you continue walking. You manage to get back to the motorhome and see Lando sat in the hospitality, he was with his personal trainer Jon and then the performance engineer Jarv.

You walk past them and here Jarv say something to your brother.

"Go follow her, you need to sort this out before the race"

"She doesn't want to talk to me, I've tried" he groans as you wait behind the door just in earshot of them.

"You call earlier in the garage trying? Jheez man" Jon laughs before getting up and discarding of his food tray.

"Your right!" Lando sighs before jumping up to come and find you. You start to walk away so it didn't look like you were listening in to their conversation.

"Y/N, please can we talk" Lando says stopping you right by the coffee cart.

"Mmmmm"

"Look, I was terrible the other day. Your my twin and we've shared everything together. I- I'm sorry i wasn't there to celebrate with you. It's just annoying when Jon's telling me that you've been told not to go for the overtake and then you do. I see now that you taking over worked better for the team but i cant help but be upset" he tries but you look at him in shock, why on earth was he making this moment, this apology about him and how he was affected.

"How are you still making this about you?" you scoff.

"What what do you mean, I'm explaining why i wasn't there..."

"By saying that I've upset you, when I'm the person you've affected. Do you even know what they have been saying about me in articles because of this whole thing with you and Charles? I'm being told I'm a shit driver and i shouldn't have my seat and that my own brother and multiple other drivers agree... I'm being told im a danger to the sport and that I wont have a seat come next year!" you sigh, knowing that he had a right to be upset about you overtaking him, but it shouldn't be at you.

"I'm sorry, I know I ruined it. I should've celebrated with you! Its my fault" he says, before pulling you into a hug. You hug him back, your shoulders sagging into it. Your brother was always your other half, you guys were two peas in a pod. It broke your heart when he left you behind in F2 before going to F1 in 2019. So this year, being the first year that you were back driving with your brother it was special for you.

"It's not like I wont have other podiums to celebrate this year" you jab him making him laugh.

"Oh yeah, not if i have anything to say about it!" he jokes as you both start walking back to the garage.

"I'm still upset though, just so you know. But I forgive you" you smile as you both get back to the cars.

"Hey, how's the car looking?" you ask the people around your car.

"You'll be good to go, breaks are sorted and its looking good!"

And that was true, you came P3 in FP2.

You didn't have a good night sleep, thinking about Charles and how he's tried to talk to you today, how you'd made up with Lando, and you kept asking yourself if it was too quick. But what was in your mind the most was Max and what he'd told you and how he'd been so nice to you over the last few months.

FP3 the next day was worse and you came P10, which then set the mood for Qualifying, where you finished P10 which would mean that your are in the middle for starting the next day.

Lando was in P8 meaning he was directly in front of you, you were hoping you could get a slipstream from him, and overtake Fernando on the start.

By the end of the French Grand Prix you and your brother both simultaneously moved up 4 places ending with him in P5 and you in P6, Zac was happy as you'd managed to stir Ferrari and get ahead both of them.

You were walking to your car, when you notice a sleek Ferrari next to your McLaren and a familiar man leaning against it.

"Charles I really cant deal with this, the interviews have tired me out. I'll see you in Styria!" you say, clicking the keys to open your car.

"Y/N please I need to apologize" he says grabbing at you wrist again turning you round.

"Charles, look. I forgave Lando for not being at my podium and yelling at me, but you actively told me I didn't deserve my seat when i've had to work twice as hard for it than anyone on the grid. So to be told that its undeserved is horrible because this is all I've ever wanted..." you say tears brimming your eyes.

"I'm sorry I'm so so sorry. I don't know what's wrong with me, but I'll think I'll regret this forever if I don't do this" he says before grabbing your cheeks with his hands, one sliding down to your neck before leaning in and placing his lips against yours.

You kiss back, it's more out of anger, you weren't sure why you actually kissed him back. After the initial shock you pulled away, your hand slipping in between you too to push him away.

"Charles what the hell" you shout, looking at him eyes wide.

"I'm sorry, but the reason I get so annoyed with you is because I've had a crush on you for years. At first I hated that you always were better than me, I got more aggressive and you were the safer driver back then, so you'd give me room let me pass. I knew I'd never have a chance with you, getting you attention was easier when I teased you, but i guess as i got older i got more sour at you, and how everyone seemed to adore you and grab your attention apart from me" he reasons now holding her wrist again.

"Charles, you cant, you cant do that" you cry.

"What, I cant admit what I've been feeling for you for years. Y/N please" he begs, the puppy eyes looking down at you as you shrunk yourself.

"What's going on over here" Max asks coming over looking between you and Charles, you turn away so that he doesn't see the tears in your eyes, wiping them with the sleeve of your orange McLaren rain jacket.

"Nothing Max" you say before turning back round smiling at the both of them.

"Come on Y/N. I know you better than that" Max said but you decided to stay silent.

"Is he bothering you again? Charles, just leave her the fuck alone. We spoke about this after Azerbaijan..." Max says pushing him away from you.

"Max don't! Its fine I promise, I'll see you both in Austria okay?" you say getting into the car. You sit there for a second, contemplating what the hell just happened before you realize both the drivers are still stood there watching you.

What. The. Hell.

A/N: I don't know if i like this, it feels like I made her and Lando make up too quickly, and Charles felt kinda quick. But for future ideas in this series, her and Lando making up now means room for more angst in the future *wink,wink*

Taglist:

@littlesatanicassholebitch @hockey-racing-fubol @laura-naruto-fan1998 @22yuki @simxican @sinofwriting @lewisroscoelove @cmleitora @stupidandunnecessary @clayra-g @daemyratwst @honey-belden @moonypixel @lauralarsen @vader-is-hot @ironcowboycopnickel @itsjustkhaos @the-untamed-soul @beebo86 @happylittlereader @ziejustme @lou-larcher5 @thewulf @purplephantomwolf @chasing-liberosis @chillyleclerc @chanthereader @annoyingmoonballoon @summissss @evieepepi08 @havaneseoger08 @celesteblack08 @gulphulp @fandom1ruined2me @celebstories @starfusionsworld @jspitwall @sierruhh @georgeparisole @dakotatankbig @youcannotcancelquidditch @zzonsbeek @tallbrownhairsarcastic @mellowarcadefun @ourteenagetragedy @otako5811 @countingstacksandpanicattacks @peachiicherries @formulas-bitch @cherry-piee @hopexcroc @mirrorball-6 @spilled-coffee-cup @mehrmonga @bigsimperika @blueberry64857959 @eiraethh @lilypadlover @curseofhecate @alliwantisadonut @the-fem1n1ne-urge @21stcenturytaegi @dark-night-sky-99 @spideybv28 @i-wish-this-was-me @tallrock35 @butterfly-lover @barnestatic

#f1 imagine #f1 x reader #formula 1 x you #formula 1 #formula one #formula one fanfiction #charles leclerc #charles lecrelc x reader #max verstappen x you #max verstappen #lando norris imagine #lando norris #f1 fandom #max verstappen fanfic

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lycheedr3ams · 11 months

Text

Choke on It ~ (part 1)

Fem!reader x hard!dom!konig

MDNI! NSFW!

Part 2

This is complete filfth and probably the most sinful thing i've ever written. not proofread

TW: gun kink, mean konig, hard dom konig, choking on his massive dick, slight masochism, hair-pulling, mask kink, swallowing his cum, lmk if I missed anything

(I'm not sure if a gun kink counts as dark content, so just be aware of this. Always use safe words and enthusiastic consent! Don't try this stuff at home.)

A few weeks ago, you told Konig that you'd like to...experiment in the bedroom a bit. He was usually a little rough, given his massive size and strength, but his words and the way he looked at you was always so gentle and loving. And you were fucking tired of it. You wanted him to just use you like you knew he could.

"I just want you to be really rough, for once," you explained to him one night. "I know you can use me however you want. Please, just do that."

His eyes widened in surprise, with a hint of worry. "Are you sure, Liebling?" he asked, concerned. "I don't want to hurt you."

You looked him right in the eyes as you said, "That's exactly what I want, Konig. Show me that I belong to you. I want you to do anything. You can even... bring a gun into it. I don't care."

His breath stopped for a moment as he stared at you like a deer in the headlights. This massive beast of a soldier, who has killed so many people, is frightened by your words.

"If...if that's what you want...." he said nervously. But he couldn't help the excitement that started to blossom in his chest at the thought of finally being in control in the bedroom for once. He was always so willing to submit.

"Just surprise me, okay baby? Really, nothing is off the table."

Konig nodded and thought hard for the next few weeks.

.......

You didn't think it would happen tonight. You were just laying in your shared bed in you and Konig's apartment when he came back from maintenance training during his time off. When you heard the door shut as he entered, you got off the bed and happily walked up to him with a smile.

"Glad you're back from work," you say as you wrap your arms around his massive frame. But he doesn't hug you back. You look up at him, confused. "Are you all right? Did you have a bad day?" you ask.

His sniper hood was still on, and he was wearing the more casual camo pants and a tight black shirt, still drenched with sweat from his workout. He looked down at you without any emotion in his eyes.

"Kneel," he commanded with a low, raspy voice.

You looked up at him, blinking in confusion.

"Did you fucking hear me?" he asked as he looked down at you.

You gasped. "Y...yes. I was... just surprised, is all," you say as you begin to sink on your knees. Before both of your knees can even reach the hardwood floor, his gloved hand tangles tightly in your hair, and he pushes your face right into his crotch. You can smell his musk through his pants.

"You fucking wanted this, so you'll take it," he growled from above you. "You know what to do."

You look up at him with wide eyes before nodding and quickly undoing his belt and sliding the zipper down. Before you can even reach to pull him from his boxers, you can feel how hot and hard he is.

"You're so hard, Konig," you observed. He pulled your hair, and you yelped in pain.

"I didn't tell you to speak, now did I?" he said punishingly. "The only time your mouth should be open is when you're choking on my fucking cock. I haven't got all night."

Your heart fluttered in your chest at his words. This is it - this is exactly what you wanted, and you felt shame as you could feel yourself drenching your panties. You quickly pulled his hard length out from his sweaty boxers, and the scent of his sweat almost made you faint. You pumped his thick, hot length in your hand before roughly pushed your hand away and shoved your mouth down on his cock with his thumb and index finger prying your mouth open. Tears instantly sprang into your eyes from the sting of his entire length shoved into your mouth so quickly. You could feel his thick, hot tip poking the back of your throat.

He groaned above you and shoved your face down so that your nose brushed against his pubes. You coughed and sputtered with him still in your mouth, and he shook his head at you.

"Come on, you're used to my length by now, are you not?" he mocked with a teasing smirk hidden by his sniper hood. "Fucking. Take. It." He commanded, each word punctuated by a thrust of his hips into your throat. His cock touched your tonsil each time and you couldn't stop choking. He roughly pulled you off his cock by your hair and stared down at you, shaking his head as you choked and spit dribbled out of your mouth and onto the hardwood floor.

"Fucking pathetic," Konig spat. You looked up at him, hoping for some sort of comfort from your normally loving boyfriend, but only saw a demon in that moment. "Relax your throat, yeah?" he said before suddenly shoving your mouth onto his wet cock again. You were more prepared for it this time, but nothing could stop your gags when he thrusted past your tonsils. He pulled you off his cock again and let go of your hair as he reached for something tucked in a back pocket.

Your eyes widened as you coughed when you saw him holding the hand-gun that he always conceal carries. He stared at you as he turned the safety on. But it was still loaded. You looked up at him, and he almost felt pity before he harshly reached down and dragged you back to your knees by your hair.

"You're going to fucking take it, and not choke, do you understand?" he commanded as he held the end of the gun right against your head. The cold metal poked into your skull, a contrast from the warm fingers of his gloved hand in your hair. You gulped as you look up at him. He shoved the gun deeper in your skull.

"I asked you a question," he growled as he bent over you.

"Yes! I understand!" You squeaked as you nodded.

Satisfied with your answer, Konig shoved you on his length again. One hand holding the back of your head and forcing you on his cock, the other holding the gun that was shoved against the side of your head. You felt completely powerless as he thrusted deep into your throat and groaned above you. You hollowed out your cheeks and wrapped your tongue around him, trying to focus on that rather than your gag reflex and the gun against your head.

"Scheisse," Konig hissed. He looked down at you and saw your heavenly face: your nose shoved right against his pubes, the tears flowing freely down your cheeks, and your throat bobbing as you struggled to take him.

"All you need is a gun to your head to make you behave, is that it?" he teased as his cock twitched. "I know you're so fucking wet right now. This is what you asked me for, remember?"

You closed your eyes as you tried to nod with his length halfway down your throat. Spit was dripping down your chin and down your throat, and Konig laughed at the sight.

"So desperate for this cock, aren't you?" he teased further. He suddenly stopped thrusting and instead used your hair to move your head up and down his cock, your lips wrapping perfectly around his thick length. You could feel one prominent vein slide against your bottom lip with each stroke. You sucked hard on his tip each thrust, and he began to tremble.

"Don't fucking stop," he said as he gripped your hair tighter. The tingling pain of having your hair pulled was almost just as unbearable as his cock down your throat. He dropped the gun and placed his hands on either side of your head as he thrusted into your mouth at a frantic pace before he came loudly down your throat. You could feel his hot cum spurting and sliding down your esophagus. He finally pulled you off of him, and you nearly collapsed on the floor as you gripped your throat, coughing loudly and with spit dripping down your chin.

Konig took off his sniper hood and sat on the floor with you. He placed his hands on your shoulders and squeezed gently.

"My love, are you okay?" he asked with worry plainly laced in his voice. "I hope I wasn't too rough with you..."

You shook your head, your throat unable to form words. You offered him a tired smile as you placed your hand on his thigh.

"Oh, you can't speak?" he asked as you shook your head "no."

"I'm sorry, Liebling, here," he picked you up easily and set you down on the couch. Part of you wishes he would throw you around the living room too. "Let me get you some water." Konig disappeared into the kitchen and returned with a glass of water, which you drank gratefully. He sat next to you and you cuddled close to him as he gently stroked your hair and undid the knots he created.

hehe

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channelinglament · 1 year

Text

Sksjdjjkskskskskksk

I know I should be focusing more on reqs, but I had to take this off my mind skskksskks (btw I'm rn in the underground belobog part of story) (I kinda called it SAHSR as in self aware hsr)

☆•°Self-Aware Honkai Star Rail°•☆

Tw: no proofread, mentioned drowning(but it didn't happen), war, hate, religious themes, self awareness, kinda ooc, grammar mistakes because I am typing this at 12AM instead of sleeping, isolation

So, you know how in the beginning we play as Kafka? Yeah, I'm pretty sure she felt your presence. At first she was kinda weirded out, and was on guard. Who knows what you would do to her, while controlling her?

Oh look, you're helping her.. Hmm, maybe you aren't that bad after all. Still on guard, but thankful. With you she seems to fight more faster and is more efficient.

Same goes with Silver Wolf. They don't seem to mind your presence that much.

You even helped them to pick a trailblazer! But after picking them, you left Kafka and Silver Wolf. They didn't really mind it. They have been doing good without you, so it should be fine!

Meanwhile, the trailblazer is confused. First, they don't remember anything except their own name(or the name you gave them), then Kafka leaves and someone is watching over them. Oh how confusing and strange. But they caught early on that you're helping them. You're not an enemy.

During their "adventures" trailblazer starts thinking of you as a family. Kinda annoying since you control their body most the time (unless it's a cutscene) but you're cool nonetheless. They see you as a safespace.

Meanwhile March 7th and Dan Heng don't understand what is happening. Who is controlling them? Why after they met trailblazer? Why are you controlling them?

I think March would, just like the trailblazer, like you and find you annoying at the same time. Dan Heng would stay on guard (but also see you as safe space/nice person to hang with). Not as much on guard as when you first...met but still. It'll take him time to get off guard. The more time you spend with them, the more familiar they are with you, the more they like you.

Why annoyed, you may ask? Well, imagine you want to.. for example fight, but someone controls your movement and does it instead of you. Or goes the other way (aka exploring) instead of the path you've originally chosen.

They certainly would like when you make them stronger. No matter who is on your team, they'll like it (I mean, who wouldn't?)

But.. sometimes, even if they like you, they get tired of always being on the team. Thank you, yes, but they need to rest too. They mostly rest when you're offline, since..time kinda stops there. But when you're online? damnnn they walk and fight so much.. (I fr walk everywhere to find enemies to fight, so uhh, if you're like me, they would be tired and maybe annoyed at it)

I think some characters would even hate you. It doesn't apply to the main trio btw, they'll always like you. The reason some may hate you is that they have so much stuff to do, yet you choose them to walk around and fight all day. They're even supposed to be here! (For example, using Herta when fighting someone in Belobog)

If they could, they would scold you. But sadly game doesn't allow that.

It only appears in normal, self aware circumstances. Aka a normal self aware. Some like you, some hate you. You just kinda exist. (That one strange friend/sibling, y'know?)

But what if they would see you as a God? Something divine? Like in SAGAU?

Well, you're doomed, what can I say?

Everyone would want to be in your team. Oh, poor Gacha system.

They would hate it tbh. While in just self aware some would avoid you on purpose (aka busy characters), here? Where everyone sees you as a divine being? Oh dear..

Imagine several people trying to come through a single door, all at the same time? Yeahhh that's what happens. The standard and limited banner would literally fist fight while trying to get "home" to you. So don't be surprised if nobody comes home, at all.

But some may cooperate, and you may get more 5☆ or 4☆! Basically characters you wanted.

Those on your team would be proud! Mostly if the main trio are still there. Some would be envious of trailblazer. You're always with them, even if they're not on your team.(how could you?!)

Kafka and Silverwofl would be devastated. I'm pretty sure Silverwolf could possibly destroy the gacha system and come home. Only her (and maybe Kafka)

People in Belobog would hate the lore and everything game makes them do what they do. They're so happy they met you! You're here to save them! They don't want to fight you, so please don't be mad at them.

Honestly, if you were to get isekai'ed into hsr, I would recommend to the normal au.

The ones who hate you would just tell you off and never interact again, while your family/friends would hang out with you. Plus you could help a lot in Astral Express!

Maybe get Himeko and Mr.Yang some tea? Or help Pom Pom with whatever he needs?

If you get into the Worshipping Lunatics au..? I feel sorry for you.. You would never rest-

Whether you choose to stay at Astrak Express, or Herta's *I forgot the name* or whatever, they are all ready to wage war against each other. And if you decided to stay somewhere, that means you clearly favor them and their place more! Those who were chosen are happy/smug. While other try to improve their place/copy the place you've chosen to make you reconsider and stay with them.

The amount of gifts.. try to not drown okay?

They might even all agree to keep you in one place. Lock you in there and hope you won't be mad at them.

That's all for now

(Gotta work on reqs now or in the morning, they're still open btw)

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unseededtoast · 6 months

Text

I’ve Got My Eye On You | Spencer Reid x F! Reader

Summary: A piece of Spencer Reid died the day Tobias Hankle kidnapped and tortured him. Seeing your friend in desperate need of help, you take it upon yourself to keep an eye on him and help him every step of the way, no matter how hard those steps may be. Inspired by “Say Yes To Heaven” by Lana Del Rey.

Content warnings: mention/discussion of addictions, narcotics references, withdrawal description.

wc: 9.3k

Also cross-posted on Wattpad and AO3. Link to my masterlist for everything else I’ve posted

a/n: thank you to all who take time to read my stories. I appreciate each and everyone of you, and you all deserve the softest forehead kisses.

- - - - -

"Spencer I know what Tobias did to you, and I want you to know that I'm here for you. You're one of my closest friends and I don't want you to feel like you have to handle this on your own. It's not your fault, and what he did to you was wrong, please don't blame yourself. And please let me help you, I know you'd do the same for me. I can't lose you to this, you mean too much to me and you deserve to be free of this torment." Your throat constricts with emotion and you can't help the single tear that rolls down your cheek.

"I've tried to stop but I can't." Spencer's voice cracks through his tears, beckoning you to lift your head to meet his gaze. His eyes are tear-filled and his grip on your hands tightens. Sniffling, you nod your head, prepared to take on this challenge with him.

- - - -

A part of Spencer Reid died the day he was kidnapped by Tobias Hankle. You noticed it like day turned to night. After he had been rescued, there was a hollowness in his eyes you had never seen before. The rest of the team seemed quick to move on and it's like they almost disregarded the horrors and trauma Spencer endured.

But you were not as quick to forget, nor did you brush it under the rug. You had taken note of the needle tracks left in his arms when he was rescued, and you were keenly aware that narcotics addiction is one hell of a beast to slay. And so you took it upon yourself to keep an eye on him; you were not about to lose one of your closest friends, and it became obvious that nobody else was going to be there to support him.

As you look across the bullpen to the man who occupies your thoughts you reminisce about the Spencer you knew before the tragedy. He was bright-eyed and innocent, socially awkward but charming in his own way. And while many of those things are still true, he's changed.

You've noticed how he's taken on a much more serious tone on cases, how he's becoming more skeptical of people. And you don't miss how his fingers find their way into his pockets during stressful conversations or how he's developing a short temper. Alarm bells sound off in your head and you wonder how the others could be missing this. But you know if nobody else is going to intervene and help him, then you will.

Spencer turns around with papers in his hands and you avert your gaze quickly, not wanting to be caught staring at him. The clock lets you know it's time to go home and the other team members head out the door with farewells. You politely say your goodbyes to them but hang back intentionally.

The bullpen is occupied only by you and Spencer now. It's not unusual for either of you to work over, but this time you're not staying for the paperwork. While Spencer wraps up his work you feign busyness, you don't want him to become skeptical of you. This plan had been mulling over in your mind for a week now, and you've just now been able to find the courage to act on it.

Twenty minutes pass before you see Spencer start wrapping up his final report, and so you casually begin packing up as well. What a coincidence that you two finished at the same time. You stand from your chair and shrug your coat on, preparing for the crisp air that awaits you outside.

"Hey, if you want I can give you a ride home. The buses stopped an hour ago and it's pretty cold out." You softly break the silence between the two of you. Spencer stops in his tracks and you see the conflict on his face. You hope he takes you up on your offer, your entire plan kind of hinges on it. After a few fleeting moments of contemplation, he nods his head.

"Sure, that would be nice. Thank you." He gives you a small smile and you let out a breath you were unaware of holding. The two of you walk side by side out of the building and into the cold air, where your breath turns to white clouds.

"How'd your reports go?" You ask, trying to keep a conversation flowing. Your stomach turns in nervousness and you remind yourself of what's at stake so as to not back out of your plan for fear of rejection or failure.

"They went okay." His answer is too short for your liking. As you buckle your seatbelt you notice how his hand finds it way into his coat pocket. Your heart drops, but you remain casual as you start driving towards his apartment.

"So do you actually think we're going to get a full weekend off?" So far your plan is going almost as well as you had hoped, and you count down the minutes before you'll arrive at Spencer's building. He sighs in the seat next to you,

"Maybe. I think I heard JJ and Hotch talk about a no-contact weekend unless it's an absolute emergency." He turns his head to look out of the window and you swallow your nerves. You only hope that he's not trying to read your body language.

"So any fun plans this weekend then?" You come to a stop at a light and look over to Spencer. From the soft glow of the street lamp you see how tired he looks, and your heart aches for your friend.

"No. You?" His answer is simpler than the ones he usually gives you; conciseness is also a new development it seems.

"Nothing particularly fun." You honestly answer before pulling up to the curb next to his apartment. Pushing back all doubts that float in your mind, you know the time has come and only hope that things turn out well.

Spencer goes to reach for the door handle, uttering a thank you, but you reach out and grab his bicep to keep him in the car for just a few more moments. Your heart thumps in your chest as he settles back into the seat and looks at you with curiosity. Taking a deep breath, you decide to just rip the bandaid off and be straightforward with him.

"Spencer. There's something I want to talk to you about." Your eyes meet his, faces only illuminated faintly from the street.

"What is it?" There's no trace of skepticism in his voice and it gives you a boost of hopefulness. So far his short temper hasn't effected your relationship with him, but you know full well that this conversation could change that.

You and Spencer had developed a good friendship over the years. The two of you were hired around the same time and so it was easy to bond over being the newbies on the team. And after a few years the two of you had been able to build a strong bond based on trust and respect; he was one of the few people you know you can count on. You trust him with your life and now you hope he trusts you with his.

Keeping a gentle hand on his arm, you want him to know that what you're about to say is coming from a place of love.

"You know I care about you, right?" You start off your rehearsed lines, careful to pick your wording just right so that he doesn't feel attacked or judged. His head nods almost instantly.

"Of course." He says, and you see the authenticity clearly in his eyes. But they're not the eyes you've come to know, you see within them the anguish he's going through.

Though you had practiced these words several times over the week, saying them out loud makes this situation all too real for you. The reality hits you like a brick wall that if Spencer doesn't get some help, his life may be on the line.

Spencer's jaw sets tightly and you see his eyes follow the tear down your cheek. Your lower lip quivers as you try to keep your composure, but once you see his jaw waver, your façade cracks. Soon enough, you and Spencer are crying together, both of you gripping onto each other's hands like a lifeline.

His hands shake as they grab onto yours, enveloping them completely. You know the tremors aren't from nerves, and it causes you to cry harder. All you want is for him to be free of this addiction.

"You don't have to do it alone. I'm right here with you, every step of the way." You rest your hand on his cheek, letting him know that your words are true. And though you have a long road ahead of you, you know you'd walk across fiery coals every second of your life for him.

- - - - -

The road to recovery is one full of bumps, twists, and turns. You knew that this would be difficult, but you had severely underestimated just how challenging it was going to get.

As soon as Spencer had accepted your offer of help, you had done everything you could to educate yourself about narcotics addiction and how to support someone who is seeking recovery. An interesting fact you had come across was that the withdrawal symptoms for Dilaudid addiction typically cease quicker than other drug withdrawals, but they're more intense. And this had never been clearer than it is right now.

"Is there anything else I can get for you?" Your hand brushes hair out of Spencer's eyes as he lays on the couch, drenched in sweat with shaking hands.

He had been running a fever for a few hours now, and developed nausea and anxiety recently; all normal and expected symptoms but that didn't mean they were easy to handle.

"Some space." He snaps back quickly, and you try hard not to take it personally. Irritability is also an unfortunate side effect of withdrawal.

With a sigh, you back away from him and walk over to the window, which has frosted over with fresh snow. Due to the holiday season, Hotch gave everyone two weeks off to celebrate Christmas and also New Year. Spencer had asked you to stay with him during these two weeks so that he could quit, and of course you said yes.

It's not like you had family plans anyway, the team is more of your family than blood relatives at this point. And before you arrived at Spencer's you had delivered gifts to the rest of the team, peddling a story of how you're going on a vacation during the break, so that they don't contact you. And how you wished you were on a tropical island sipping a fruity drink somewhere instead of watching your best friend writhe in pain.

Turning your head slightly to look over at him, you see his trembling hands ball themselves into fists over and over again, a likely coping mechanism for the torment he's experiencing. From the research you've done, you know the worst is yet to come.

- - - - -

Hours later, in the middle of the night, you hear Spencer make his way to the bathroom. Seconds later you hear him get sick and you check the watch on your wrist. According to your estimates, he's likely hitting the peak of withdrawal symptoms.

Sighing and rubbing the sleep from your eyes, you cautiously enter his room and see the bathroom light on. Spencer's hunched over the toilet, hair sticking to his forehead with sweat that's dripping down his temple. Upon hearing your arrival, he looks over to you in the doorway and you've never seen a more pleading look.

Instead of just standing and staring, you move to run cold water over a cloth and place it on the back of his neck. Another wave of sickness comes over him, and you kneel beside him, rubbing circles on his back to try and bring some sort of comfort to him.

After the nausea has ceased, he collapses back against the wall. You take the cloth from around his neck and gingerly wipe away the sweat and clean up around his mouth.

"It's okay Spence, you're doing great. I'm proud of you." You whisper and place a kiss to his forehead, and you mean every single word.

You sit beside him and his clammy hand finds yours, and he holds it tight. Your eyes travel up his arm, seeing the faint marks from previous needle injection and you hope that they fade quickly, he doesn't need a constant reminder.

"Did you get rid of it?" He asks suddenly, startling you out of you focus. His head is tipped back against the wall and his eyes are closed.

"I got rid of it all. Nothing is left here." You confirm to him with a gentle squeeze of his hand.

Earlier when you arrived the first step was for you to destroy the vial of Dilaudid and all the needles he had so that when this stage of withdrawal came around he wouldn't be able to give into the intense cravings.

"I need it." He says, eyes opening and staring into yours. Spencer's eyes are glazed over and watery. You shake your head, encouraging him to keep going.

"No, you don't need it. This is the peak of the withdrawal Spence. A few more hours and things will get easier." You recite the information you remember from your research.

As if he's suddenly disgusted with you, he drops your hand and looks away, pushing his own hair out of his face. His jaw tenses and his foot starts tapping against the floor.

"Get out of here." His tone is harsh, and your heart drops, but you listen to him.

Without a word, you leave his bedroom and close the door behind you. You know that the withdrawal is wreaking havoc on his mind and body, but it's hard to watch and hear your best friend behave so differently.

You go to take a seat in his couch, and reminisce on the good times the two of you shared here. There were weekend nights spent completing puzzles and making cookies together, and other times you just lounged around while he read. The connection you two shared was an easy going one, there were never any expectations and you two were just content with each other's company.

You can't wait to have those nights back, and you know they may not happen for a while. And that's okay, as long as Spencer was getting better that's more than you can ask for.

- - - - -

One week had passed and thankfully Spencer's condition improved greatly. His hands no longer tremble, he doesn't break out into cold sweats anymore, and his personality is beginning to shine through again. Sure, there are still some bouts of anxiety and irritability, but overall you couldn't be happier with his progress.

While you wait for him to get up for the day, you make him some pancakes and bacon. His appetite had also made a reappearance. The maple smell wafts throughout his apartment and makes your tummy grumble.

The sound of Spencer's bedroom door opening cues you to turn on the coffee pot, so that he can have some fresh coffee with his breakfast. You place his favorite mug beside the pot and flip the bacon, estimating another two minutes before everything is ready.

"Good morning." Spencer's raspy morning voice says from behind you. He walks around you, mindlessly placing a hand on your waist as he squeezes past you to get to the coffee pot.

The warmth of his fingers on your waist in the cool air of the apartment sends a wave of heat through you before taking residence in your cheeks. Spencer had touched you a hundred times before, but his touch had never elicited a response from your body like this before.

"Good morning, how'd you sleep?" You ask, trying to distract yourself from whatever it was your body was doing.

After pouring steaming hot coffee into his mug and dumping a small ton of sugar into it, he leans back against the counter. Unable to help yourself, you glance over at him and see his unruly hair and take note that he's decided to wear his glasses today. Another wave of warmth radiates through you.

"Good, I didn't wake up once throughout the night." He says with a small smile, sipping his coffee. You match his smile, happy to hear that he's made another improvement.

You turn the burners off on the stove and motion for him to help himself. He sets his mug down on the counter and you turn to get yourself ready for the day. Not that you're going anywhere, you just prefer to feel a little put together. Plus, this gives you a reason to get away from Spencer's observant eyes. What if he noticed something was weird with you this morning?

Mind occupied with dissecting your own feelings, you manage to toss on a sweater and some comfortable sweats, not even bothering to see if they match or not. No, your brain is too wrapped up in decoding why your body had reacted the way it did to Spencer's touch.

In all the years you two had been friends, he had touched you like that before to get past you, he had held your hand after particularly hard cases so you could fall asleep on the jet, and yet none of those times made you feel like he just had in the kitchen. So what exactly had changed?

The question plays itself over and over in your mind as you rejoin him at the dining table for breakfast. Only the soft ticking of the clock and the occasional scrape of a fork across a plate can be heard. It's typical for the two of you to share your mornings relatively peacefully, letting each other wake up for the day. It's a calm routine, one you know you'll miss after this is all over.

"Are you ready to get back to work next week?" Spencer breaks the silence, finishing off his bacon.

"Yes and no. I'll miss the free time, but it'll feel good to get back out there. What about you?" You admit that you're not completely ready to get back into the swing of things, you've found that you quite enjoy spending your days with Spencer.

"I'm just ready to be back to myself." He says, a soft smile on his face. You nod knowingly,

"You will be, Spence." You fight the urge to reach across the table for his hand, afraid of how your body may betray you again, so instead, you offer him your most genuine gaze. But it hardly conveys the sincerity you want it to.

"I still crave it, and I know that once I'm back out there I'll want it even more." He tells you with a sigh. Unfortunately, craving the drug of choice is a lasting side effect, especially for those experiencing stress.

"That may be true but you've worked so hard to get here. And I'll be there for you, never forget that. If it ever feels like it's too much, come to me and we'll work through it. I promise." Spencer's eyes look slightly enlarged from his glasses, and it only allows you to see their beauty enhanced; it's like you could spend hours swimming in them.

"I know, thank you." His voice drops to a whisper, and you know he means it. Spencer has never been very good at expressing his feelings or emotions, but you know him well enough to understand the depth of his sentiment.

The two of you spend the rest of the day together tangled in blankets to keep warm. Spencer chooses to read while you only pretend to read, your focus is stuck on Spencer for some odd reason. Your back is up against the couch's armrest which gives you a clear view of Spencer overtop the book you're "reading".

You can't help but to admire the delicate crease in between his eyes as he scans the words on the page, or appreciate the soft curl of his hair that falls to his shoulders. Of course these are all things you had noticed before, but it's like you're seeing them in a new light, like it's all new. An unfamiliar feeling blooms within you but you're unable to put a finger on it.

You're sure it's nothing more than caring for you friend. Right?

- - - - -

The first day back to the office comes sooner than you would've liked. Last night you spent the night alone in your own apartment, just like any other night, except it felt oddly empty and cold. And this morning when you woke, you had almost expected to see Spencer sitting at your dining room table with a cup of hot coffee in his hands. But instead you were met with a barren table, the sweet smell of coffee nowhere to be found.

When you reach the office building you're thankful for the distraction it offers. Everyone is in good spirits from the extended break, and even you find yourself excited to get on another case. The team congregates in the briefing room, and Spencer strolls in at the last second and takes a seat next to you like always.

You turn to greet him and notice the dark circles underneath his eyes and your heart drops to your stomach. It's only been one night alone, surely he didn't give into temptation. But to your relief, he gives you a sly head shake and a thumbs up, as if he could read your mind. Perhaps he also didn't sleep well last night.

JJ presents the case as usual, and Hotch tells the team to be wheels up in thirty. You know you'll have to review the case file on the jet, your mind was anywhere except the case and you hope that you're able to get your head in the game before the team lands and starts working the case.

- - - - -

It seems your wishes for a clear head go unanswered. The team had successfully caught the unsub, but you felt guilty because you know you were distracted the entire time. Sure, you helped out where you could and still did your job, but you know that your analyses were not as thorough as usual.

Instead of being fully dedicated to the case, you kept glancing over to Spencer every few minutes and found your thoughts seemingly to revolve around him. Sometimes he would see you looking and other times not. But when he did catch your eye, a bundle of nerves within your stomach would ignite themselves, leading you further into your mystery.

There's just no good reason for you to be reacting like that to something as simple as his gaze. It's perplexing you, a puzzle you can't quite seem to put together. Nothing had changed between you two, there's no clear reason why you would begin having these feelings.

"Meeting for drinks tonight?" Garcia walks into the bullpen as the team arrives back, in a chipper mood as always.

You wait to see how others answer, not particularly in the mood to go. You would much rather go back home in silent contemplation or maybe see if Spencer wanted company. Seeing as how bars weren't really your scene, it was common for you and Spencer to find something else to do together. Usually you two would end up agreeing to a movie or going for dinner somewhere.

"Sure." Morgan answers first, slinging his jacket over his shoulders. Emily and JJ agree as well and you watch as Penelope waltzes over to Spencer.

"How about you my favorite resident genius?" She nudges him with her shoulder. As if on instinct, he looks over to you. You know his mind is going down the same path yours is, deciding whether or not to go. To answer his silent request, you simply shrug your shoulders.

"Uh, yeah sure." He eventually answers, loosening the tie around his neck. A part of you is grateful he said yes, you know this will give you plenty of opportunities to distract your mind.

The team enters a familiar bar, providing some comfort though the environment is anything but tranquil. Everyone takes a seat around a table, chattering about the case and everything else that comes to mind.

"What's up with you tonight?" Morgan asks, nudging your arm. With a sigh, you shake your head and look at the drink swirling in your glass.

"I don't know. I guess I just feel a little off." You admit, but fall short of the whole truth. You should've known, working with profilers, that one of them was bound to pick up on your unusual behavior. Giving you a knowing nod, Morgan brings you in for a side hug,

"Happens to the best of us sometimes." He says, and you nod, knowing he's right. During your time on the team you've seen everyone experience a lull of some sort. Maybe that's what this all is, just some weird mental lull.

The rest of the night goes off without much excitement. That is, until everyone is about ready to leave. As you grab your jacket off the back of the chair you notice Morgan lean in to whisper something in Spencer's ear. You watch as their eyes flit across the bar to a woman who's staring right back at Spencer.

A nauseous feeling rises within you, but you force yourself to be quiet and watch as Spencer smiles to Morgan before crossing the bar to talk to her. In all your years of knowing Spencer, this was out of pattern behavior if you've ever seen it.

"Come on pretty girl, I think our boy is finally catching on." Morgan wraps his arms around your shoulder and guides you out of the bar. The last thing you see is the woman wrap her arms around Spencer's neck.

The walk home is so much colder and lonelier than it usually is.

- - - - -

Months later, you realize that the feelings Spencer gives you aren't going away. In fact, you think they've only become more prevalent with each brush of his fingertips and each smile he gives you. But, you've done a good job suppressing them so far for the sake of the friendship. After all, you and Spencer work closely together during cases and still keep up your routine friendship activities.

Or at least, you did up until three weeks ago.

Something happened around three weeks ago that you haven't been able to put your finger on. Spencer's been distancing himself from you little by little, but it's glaringly obvious to you. At first it was skipping a planned movie night and then it was taking a rain check for dinner at his favorite Thai place. And then during cases you'd noticed how he doesn't joke with you as much and that he almost avoids your gaze.

Sitting at your desk, you look across the bullpen and try to zone in on the conversation Spencer is having with Morgan. It seems Morgan has become Spencer's confidante of choice these days. And while you want to respect Spencer's choice, you can't help but wonder why he doesn't come to you anymore. A piece of you feels hollow without Spencer around as much as he used to be.

You considered that maybe you had simply become too attached to his presence during his detox, and that you're overthinking everything. Maybe this is all just in your head. You try to convince yourself of any other explanation, but a nagging voice in the back of your head tells you that it's something wrong with you, that he just doesn't want to share a close relationship anymore.

Later in the day, you find Morgan in the break room and decide to get some answers. As casually as you can, you join Derek in finding a snack.

"Can I ask you something?" You keep your voice quiet, and give Derek a look to let him know that this isn't one of your jokes. Standing straighter, he nods.

"Of course pretty girl." You pick at the skin around your nails before you can force yourself to say the words.

"Is Spencer okay?" You tread lightly, unsure of how much Derek is willing to give you.

"Yeah, he's fine. Why?" Derek's eyebrow quirks and you sigh, knowing you have to come clean to him or he won't let it go.

"It's just that he doesn't hang out with me much anymore and he hasn't been talking to me. We used to go out at least once a week and we always talked. I don't know if I did, or said, something." You meet Derek's eyes reluctantly but see no traces of judgment in his expression. He reaches out and puts a hand on your shoulder.

"I don't know if I'm supposed to keep this under wraps or not, but I think you deserve to know. He's been, um, putting himself out there lately." Your eyebrows scrunch together, not following what Derek is trying to say.

"Putting himself out there?" You ask for clarification but a pit of dread begins forming in your stomach. Derek licks his lips and offers you a sad smile, the pit of despair grows.

"It seems that he's becoming quite popular with the ladies." Is all Derek has to say before it sinks in. Your mouth goes dry and you suddenly lost your appetite for your snack. Pushing yourself off the countertop, you give Derek a rushed thank you before retreating back to your desk.

Spencer's sitting at his own, filling out paperwork and you can't help but to look at him in a different light. If you concentrate hard enough, you think you can see traces of bruises on his neck. They're faint enough that you wouldn't really be able to tell they're there unless you were looking for them.

Your heart hurts with the realization, you miss your friend dearly. After helping him detox you were sure that there was nothing getting between your friendship, but you guess other women seem to have won his favor.

Images of Spencer's lips on other women makes your skin crawl. This behavior just isn't like him. It's almost as if he's traded one addiction for another.

Your blood runs cold as the thought crosses your mind. In your studies of addiction during detox, you had read about addiction transference and how people who are prone to addictions can sometimes trade off. In Spencer's case it seems like he's traded the needle for sexual gratification.

While his dependence on Dilaudid was easy to pinpoint and treat, sex addiction is another beast entirely. This kind of addiction gets brushed under the rug by a lot of people, and commonly isn't seen as an issue. And truthfully, if it was anyone but Spencer, you may not have even noticed or cared. But as images of his hands on other women's bodies, his lips attached to their neck, their hands traveling his body flood your mind, you realize that you care a lot.

The realization dawns on you that you're actually feeling jealous of these faceless and nameless women.

- - - - -

Your patience is tested two weeks later, when the team is out celebrating another victory. And instead of Spencer sitting beside you or Morgan like usual, he's across the bar talking to a beautiful woman.

Through your jealousy you try to figure out when Spencer became such a social person, it's unlike the man you became friends with. Never would you have ever imagined that Spencer regularly seeks out women to spend his nights with. But here you sit, watching as he leans in and whispers something in her ear.

Your face runs hot and you tip back your glass, desperate to go numb. You had known Spencer was partaking in this lifestyle, but it's something entirely different when you're face to face with it and be forced to actually acknowledge what's happening.

"Woah that's your fourth already. You good?" Garcia asks from beside you, nursing her second drink. Ripping your gaze away from Spencer, you give Garcia a wide smile.

"Never been better." The sarcasm drips from your voice. You slip from your seat and go to the bar, your steps only slightly wobbly.

Purposely, you take a spot beside the woman Spencer's talking to, partially to eavesdrop and partially to get the bartender's attention. The woman beside you giggles insufferably at something Spencer said, causing you to tap your fingers against the bar top impatiently waiting for the bartender.

After you finally get another drink in your hand and turn to go back to the team, your eye catches Spencer's. His gemstone eyes meeting yours is enough to cause your heart to stop beating. Your lips fall apart, suddenly overwhelmed with sadness. You miss Spencer so much.

But unfortunately he doesn't keep your gaze for long, as the woman beside him runs her hands up his chest. Fighting the urge to get violent, or get sick, you give him a half-hearted smile before returning to your spot.

Perhaps you should've cherished your time with him more. Maybe you shouldn't have taken for granted your movie nights, shared dinners, or days spent underneath the same blankets. You certainly should've been more appreciative for his friendship. And now that all of that is gone you feel lost.

Drowning your sorrows with tequila, you understand that it's not just jealousy that fills you. You had actually fallen in love with your best friend. And now you're destined to watch him love other women.

You only wish it could be you.

- - - - -

"Rough night pretty boy?" Derek teases Spencer across his desk. Your eyes look over just in time to watch Spencer adjust his sweater and rub his eyes.

"Something like that." He answers, a faint blush creeping up to his cheeks. The wave of emotion that washes over you is the perfect storm of sadness, grief, and anger.

Unable to handle hearing their conversation, you abruptly get up from your desk and carry your paperwork back to Garcia's office. You know her office is like a safe haven, and truthfully, you're hoping she can brighten your dreary mood.

Knocking on her door lightly, you hear her invite you in. Like a child coming to their parents' room, you peek in before entering all the way. Screens are lit up across her desks and it looks like she's completing ten tasks at once.

"Are you busy? If this is a bad time I don't have to-"

"Nonsense, come here." She interrupts you and clears off a space for you to put your things. At least you can still count on Garcia.

You sit next to her and open the folder, half of your report already written. As you go to put pen to paper again, Penelope speaks up.

"Are you gonna tell me why you're here?" She has a knowing tone. Your pen taps against the desk a few times as you decide on what to tell her.

"I just needed a change of scenery" Your voice isn't very convincing, and you know she doesn't buy it from the look on her face.

"Okay and now the truth?" She asks, voice light yet firm. Relenting, you decide that it's not fair to yourself to keep your emotions bottled up, where they'll inevitably erupt.

"I guess it's just that, it's silly really, but I think I just miss Spencer." You attempt to downplay the severity of your feelings. But Penelope, in her typical fashion, presses you for more because she knows there's more to the story than you care to let on.

"He's right out there." She points out and you shake your head.

"Yeah but he's not him, if that makes any sense. We never hang out anymore and we rarely even talk to each other. And we used to be so close. But maybe he just outgrew me." You think out loud, fingers playing with the pen in your hand to try and distract your mind from all the racing thoughts.

"Outgrew you? Not a chance, he adores you." She says like it's a fact, but you have trouble believing it.

"Maybe he did some time ago, but he's adoring other women now. Lots of them." You can't hide the disdain in your voice. Every time you think about someone else with Spencer, it makes your blood boil. The selfish part of you wants him all to yourself, you want more shared mornings together and you crave more afternoons spent next to one another.

"Well, that may be true, but, I know him well enough to know that he still cares about you. I see the way he looks at you from across the room. Have you tried talking to him about it?" Of course Garcia would offer a logical and mature way to handle the situation. And you're thankful for her level head, because the way you want to deal with the situation involves dragging a woman by her hair out of his apartment.

"I don't even know what I would say that wouldn't make me sound like a kid who saw their friend playing with someone else at recess." You drop your pen on the desk, frustrated with your feelings. Penelope puts a hand on your shoulder, and you look up to meet her eyes.

"You've been friends for years now, I think he probably misses you too." She tells you, a soft look in her eye that lets you know she's being genuine.

"Maybe." You shrug.

"Finish your report and before you leave for the weekend talk to him." She spins around in her chair and gets back to work, allowing you to finish your report in peace.

Her words play over and over in your mind, and you realize that she has a good point. There's no way that after being friends for so long, and going through a detox together, that he just doesn't miss you either. You know Spencer well enough to know that he's a creature of habit, he likes routine; and lately he hasn't had much of one.

Feeling more like a bad friend for not checking in on him, you talk yourself into seeking him out at the end of the day. He's not responsible for your feelings, and you shouldn't have taken his actions so personally. Spencer is your friend first, and you've been neglecting your end of the friendship. Though, a voice in the back of your mind reminds you that he has as well.

Soon enough, the end of the day rolls around and you turn your report into Hotch. Thankfully Spencer is still here, collecting his things before heading out. It seems everyone else has left for the most part. With a deep breath, you swallow your pride and walk over to him.

"Hey." Your voice is meek and much weaker than you had hoped for. Startled by your presence, Spencer turns around. Your eyes meet his but trail down his neck, where there are sure signs of bruises. But this isn't about you, you try to remind yourself. This is about making sure your friend is okay.

"Hey." He greets you back, shrugging his coat over his sweater. There's an obvious tension between you two, and so you just decide to rip the bandaid off.

"Is everything okay?" You ask, making yourself keep your eyes on his face. Spencer's eyebrows crease together,

"Everything is fine, why?" He acts as if your question is coming out of left field. Finding it difficult to come out and say what you really mean, you shift your weight from foot to foot.

"It's just that we haven't really talked much lately and I just want to make sure that you're okay." You tell him truthfully.

"I'm fine." He tells you and glances down at his watch.

"Any fun weekend plans?" You ask, knowing full well that his answer could ruin your mood for the rest of the night.

"Um, yeah. I'm supposed to meet a friend tonight. But, you could come over tomorrow if you wanted to? Or we could go somewhere?" He offers, and a smile finds its way to your face.

"I'll be there tomorrow, I'll send you a text when I'm on my way." You tell him, satisfied with your plans. He gives you a quick nod before leaving the office to go meet whoever it is that he has plans with. You doubt that he even knows her name.

But you take some comfort in knowing that you'll be able to spend time with him tomorrow. And maybe, just maybe, it'll be exactly what the two of you need to smooth things out and go back to how things used to be.

- - - - -

You awake with an unusual happiness, excited to see Spencer. It's been months since the two of you actually spent any time together and you're eager to get over to his apartment to see him. Last night you had told yourself that no matter what he may be doing, that he's still one of your closest friends and that you still need to be there for him.

After picking out a nice outfit and ensuring your hair looks nice, you send him a quick text that you'll be there shortly. And of course, you never go empty handed, and so you pick up the plate of cookies you had made last night for him.

The trip over to his apartment seems to take less time than you remember, and you make your way up the stairs until you find yourself outside of his door. You knock on his door and wait for him to answer, but a minute passes and you hear no movement on the other side. Thinking that maybe he was in the bathroom or something, you wait another minute and then knock again. This time you hear movement.

The door swings open and you smile, but it quickly drops once you see who has answered the door. Her makeup is smudged on her face and she's still in the dress she probably wore last night. Feeling sickness rise in your throat, you wordlessly turn to leave.

"Hey what are you doing? Who is it?" You hear Spencer come to the door, but you don't bother to look back. You don't want him to see the tears in your eyes. You blink the blurry tears from your vision so you don't trip and make an even bigger fool of yourself, and you get halfway down the hall before Spencer is calling your name. But you act like you don't hear him.

Just before you reach the stairwell, you feel a hand on your shoulder. You stop in your tracks and a breath catches in your throat. Looking back, you see Spencer with disheveled hair and beyond him, his friend he met with last night. The sight of her in his doorway makes you shrug his hand off of you, disgusted to think about where those hands may have been just moments before you knocked on the door.

"Where are you going?" Spencer's voice is quiet, but you can hear the hurt and curiosity in his words. With a sniffle, you look from the woman back to him.

"I'm going back home, I didn't mean to interrupt your plans or whatever." You say, words cold and curt. Turning back around, you're determined to go back home, but Spencer stops you again.

"Please don't go. Come in, please." He practically begs. And as if she just got the hint, the woman leaves down the opposite end of the hall, heels in hand. You glare at her retreating figure before turning your attention back to Spencer.

"Fine." You agree and follow him back inside his apartment.

His floor is littered with the outfit he wore to work yesterday. Tie slung across the back of the couch and shirt tossed in front of the bedroom door. Nausea washes over you and you try your best to keep your facial expression neutral. The plate of cookies finds its place on his countertop and you stand with your hands in your pockets, feeling oddly out of place in an apartment that used to feel like your second home.

"I'm sorry about that, I um, I didn't see your text." Spencer closes the door behind him and walks over to you. Trying your best to appear calm and collected, you shrug.

"It's okay." You say, feeling like it's anything but.

A silence settles between the two of you and you almost regret your decision to come over. You watch as Spencer tries to quickly tidy up the place, throwing dirty clothes into his bedroom and tossing trash away. As he makes his way through his apartment you realize that you two hadn't made any real plans, just that you would come over. And while that used to mean movies and relaxing, you know that it just wouldn't feel right tonight.

"Listen, if now is a bad time we can always reschedule." You offer and go to move towards the door.

"No! No it's okay, I want you to stay." He says, throwing the last piece of garbage away. You sigh, realizing that you're probably not leaving here without some sort of confrontation.

"So how have you been? We haven't really talked in a while." You ease into conversation, hoping to coax Spencer into opening up. He rubs the back of his neck and his eyes dart around, looking anywhere but at you.

"I've been okay. And you?" The conversation feels like one between two acquaintances, not friends.

"Yeah I've been okay. Just worried about you." You somehow find the courage to tell him your true thoughts. After all, you figure you can either tell him or simmer in your own feelings.

"Worried about me? Why?" His eyebrows scrunch together. Feeling like his gaze is too intense, you look over at the counter and let your fingers trace the lines of granite.

"I know what you've been doing Spence. And it's none of my business but, don't you kind of think it might just be a trade off?" Sure, this might be out of line and too bold, but your concerns are real.

"A trade off?" He asks, taking a step closer to you. Standing firm, you nod your head.

"Spence you put down the needle and started picking up women. Just take a second and think about it Spencer." Your eyes find their way back to his. The image of the woman opening his door gives you newfound confidence.

You watch as he closes his mouth and thinks, instead of retorting right away. It's almost as if you can see the gears of his mind turning and churning the information and analyzing his actions over the past few months. After about five minutes, he looks back up at you with his mouth slightly agape.

"It's just addiction transference." He confirms what your suspicions had been for weeks now. And Spencer isn't stupid, he knows he needs to hold himself accountable, and you're thankful he is, or this conversation could've take a far more drastic turn.

You watch as his face falls and he buries his head in his hands. Your angry resolve begins to crumble, and the love you have for him reblossoms within you, washing away any other feeling. Walking over to him, you place an unsure hand on his back to try and bring him some comfort.

"It's okay." You whisper, rubbing circles on his back. With a sigh, he looks back up to you. His soft, caring eyes look into yours and you finally recognize him. This is your Spencer.

"How could I not have seen this? It's plain as day and I let myself fall into another addiction. I was doing so good while you were here and then-" He cuts himself off abruptly, as if he said something he hadn't wanted to.

"And then what Spencer?" You push him for an answer, desperately needing to know what he was going to say.

"And then you left and I felt so alone." He admits and you can almost feel your heart stop beating in your chest.

He stands back to his full height, towering over you. Your blood runs hot in your veins as you stare into Spencer's eyes, searching for an answer.

"I know I've been a really bad friend lately but, do you think we could go back to how we were?" His voice is tender and vulnerable. Your mind was already made up the second the question left his lips.

"Of course, that's what friends are for." You say, despising having to describe yourselves as friends.

But at least you have your Spencer back.

- - - - -

"Come in!" Spencer's voice carries through the door and you let yourself into his apartment.

The past two weeks have been good, albeit a little rocky between the two of you. Spencer had stopped picking up women after a few failed attempts at stopping, but you can tell that his mind is itching for another fixation.

You step into his apartment and close the door behind you, seeing Spencer already on the couch, movie ready to play. He had let you pick out the movie this time, which is a rare occurrence but you didn't question it.

Sitting beside him, you relish in the familiar smell of the blankets. One of your demands is that he wash all of them before tonight, and he happily agreed. With a bowl of popcorn on the coffee table in front of you, you snuggle underneath your blanket and watch the movie, but you can almost guarantee that you'll fall asleep before the end.

The movie is about halfway over when Spencer spills his drink on his blanket. He balled it up and threw it in the washer to deal with later, and as he resumed his spot on the couch, you offered half of your blanket.

Scooting closer, you gave him a generous share of your blanket, and you don't miss the way his hand rests on your knee. Suddenly your attention is no longer on the movie.

He keeps his hand on your knee, until he slides it up your thigh. Breath catches in your throat and you glance at him from the corner of your eye. He's still watching the movie, he probably doesn't even realize what he's done.

Spencer's thumb lazily draws shapes on your skin, causing you to shiver. He must've noticed, because you can swear a grin spreads across his face. His hand dares to go a little higher, and this time you're able to find your voice.

"What are you doing?" You keep your voice soft. Spencer doesn't miss a beat, and he licks his lips before answering.

"I'm just watching the movie." He answers with faux innocence. Not buying his explanation, you cock an eyebrow.

"Spencer." You say, urging him to tell the truth. A part of you is worried that he's unable to help himself and is just trying to satiate his need for satisfaction.

"I'm not allowed to love on my friend?" His voice is raspy, eyes dark in the dim light.

"You can, I just, you never do this to me." You stumble over your words, the feeling of his warm hand on your skin making your brain short circuit.

Without another word, he pulls you closer to him. Your shoulders are touching, faces inches apart. With this proximity, you're sure he can hear your heartbeat.

"It's nice having you here. It doesn't feel right when you leave, it feels empty." He whispers, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. His fingertips graze your neck and you shudder.

"I miss being here all the time with you." You admit, feeling particularly vulnerable. The way he looks at you is almost enough to make you melt.

"Then stay." He says, hand coming up your arm and resting on your cheek.

"What are you doing?" You ask again, brain foggy from his touch.

"You want to know something?" He keeps his voice deep, and you nod silently.

"All of those women had one thing in common." He says and almost causes you to retract from his hold. But he follows up quickly, sensing your aversion to the topic.

"They all looked like you. But, none of them could ever begin to compare. I was searching for you in each one of them but came up short each time." You're breathless with his confession, and you allow your hands to reach up and rest on his shoulders, begging him to stay close.

"Why didn't you tell me?" You ask, keenly aware that your noses are almost touching. Spencer's eyes flick from your eyes to your lips,

"Because I didn't want to lose you. I couldn't live without you in my life, and if you didn't feel the same way then our friendship would've been in disrepair." He says and it's ridiculous to you, the thought that you didn't feel the same.

"I watched you with those other women and wished it was me. I wished you would've said yes to me, not them." You come clean, one hand trailing up to the side of Spencer's neck. This time it's his turn to shiver.

"Having you would be like having a piece of heaven." He says, and before you know it, his lips are on yours.

The two of you are warm from the blanket and from burning desire. His hand keeps you close and you grab onto the front of his shirt. Spencer kisses you with a hot need, his lips desperate to know yours intimately.

One of your hands releases his shirt and tangles in his curly hair. The brown curls still as soft as you remember.

Spencer's lips leave yours and start placing wet kisses on your cheek, to your jaw, before landing on your neck. You gasp with pleasure, eyes fluttering shut.

"Just like heaven." He mutters against your skin before finding your lips again.

When he pulls away, you can feel your swollen, wet lips and your warm cheeks. Spencer looks equally as flustered, but it's the most alluring thing you've ever seen.

Resting his forehead against yours, he takes your hands into his own. This time they're free of tremors, they're warm and inviting.

"This is me saying yes to you, if you'll have me. I've realized that nothing, and nobody, will ever be able to satisfy my heart the way you do." He states, pulling back to watch your reaction.

Squeezing his hands, you nod,

"You don't know how long I've been waiting for you. I've had my eye on you since day one." You admit, leaning in for another kiss.

Spencer wraps his arms around your waist, keeping you pressed flush against him. Your fingers find their way into his curly, and now disheveled hair, and you wouldn't have it any other way.

The feeling of his lips on your skin is indescribable, each kiss lights your love on fire.

- - - - -

Morning rolls around, sunshine breaking through the curtain in Spencer's bedroom. You roll over to face him, eyes heavy with sleep and love.

Your eyes are met with his, and as you take in his beauty you think you can see the hollowness in his eyes begin to fade. A small smile finds its way to your face as you reach out and run your thumb over his cheekbone.

"What are you smiling about?" He asks with a grin on his own face.

"Nothing, I'm just proud of how far you've come." You say, gingerly caressing his face. He hums with contentment, leaning in to kiss your forehead.

"I'd be nowhere without you." You can feel the authenticity in his words, and you know he never had to thank you for anything. You bury you head into Spencer's chest and take in his warmth, appreciating the moment with him.

Being held in his arms, you know that you would do everything over again and again if it meant that Spencer found a piece of himself again, that he's been able to heal from the damage Tobias inflicted upon him. You told him you'd be there for him every step of the way, and those words have never been more true.

You're glad you kept your eye on Spencer Reid.

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anonymityisfunwriter · 3 days

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we’re still friends

pairing: bucky barnes x reader summary: you're still friends. it's wonderful. it's mature. and though you've changed in your endeavors, you still have plenty in common, like that you're both still hopelessly, irrevocably in love with each other. based on this song - we're still friends - amy winehouse

a.n. - back to listening to amy winehouse records in between listening to TTPD. hope you guys enjoy! 💛

Bucky Barnes Masterlist | AnonymityIsFun's SongFics

you weren't sure what you were expecting.

you thought knowing he would be here would make it easier. it's why you thanked sam for the heads up. you knew he would be here. you had weeks to ready yourself for this moment.

still, nothing could prepare you seeing him for the first time since that quiet separation.

friends.

you were friends, you reminded yourself.

it’s wonderful.

it’s mature.

you’re friends.

friends that have explored every inch of each other. friends that have bared their souls to each other, that know their deepest, darkest, most intimate secrets.

yes, you were friends, but you knew in every fiber of your being that it shouldn't be this hard to see a friend. it shouldn't hurt this much to see your friend walk through the door without you by his side.

"hello… friend."

he gives a shy smile with a hesitant wave. there's a staleness in the air. a tension that makes you so viscerally aware of each and every move you make. each move is strained, rigid, forced like you're moving against tar. “how have you been?”

"good."

"good." bucky offers another half smile. it's impossible for him not to notice everything about you. it's only been a few months. time could only change a person so much. and you hadn't changed. not a bit. it's only because he notices everything about you that he realizes he still hasn't introduced the woman standing beside him when your eyes shift to just over his shoulder. he clears his throat, "oh, sorry, um, this is my friend."

"that's - it's wonderful." it doesn't take more than a split second to know that she's not just a friend. still, because you are just friends with him, you stick out a hand to her, "it's nice to meet you."

she smiles at you, a warm, genuine smile. for some reason, it only makes it hurt more. she looks at you, genuine curiosity shimmering in her eyes, "and you are?"

"um, we're - we're old friends." you're not sure what he's told her. you'd lost your old title. you were just friends now. you jut your thumb in the opposite direction. "it was nice to meet you, but i should go find sam. wish him a happy birthday."

his first clue should be the fact that he almost immediately goes after you. he barely tosses an explanation over his shoulder to his date to go after you. it's instinctive. it's natural. it's what feels right to him.

bucky catches up to you a quick moment later. he reaches for your arm, barely making contact with your skin before he remembers he lost that privilege some time ago. you turn around with a distant, tired expression. "hey, she is - she really is just a friend."

a huff of laughter leaves your lips, "you've been using that word a lot tonight."

"look, i'm sorry, i didn't know what to say," bucky stammers out. "the last time we spoke -"

"it's alright. really. that's what we are now. i mean, we are still friends, right?” that's what he said the last time you two spoke. you parted amicably. that was the story you purported. you and bucky were friends now. there's a long beat of silence. you've picked up the habit of chewing on the inside of your cheek again, bucky notices. “right?”

yes, you were friends. friends that were still hopelessly, desperately in love with each other. but at least you're still friends. at least he still had a place in your life.

he clears his throat, shakily nodding, "yeah, of course. we're friends."

you nod once, offering nothing more than a tight smile before you take off again.

"that looked... intense," sam interrupts as you walk away.

"just a friendly conversation. between friends." the word escapes bucky's lips like he's spitting out a mouthful of venom. friends. just friends.

sam quirks an eyebrow. "you're friends, really?"

bucky's eyebrows pull together as he defensively replies, "of course we are. we were friends before everything. we can be friends after too."

sam crosses his arms over his chest with a small shrug. "i still don't understand why there is an after."

"it just - it got complicated," bucky replies with a shaky sigh. "we called it before things got ugly, before we couldn't stand to be in the same room together, before we stopped -"

"loving each other?" sam finishes the sentence for bucky.

"sam." it's a short, clipped warning that falls from bucky's lips without a second thought. this wasn't up for discussion. that night was not one he was keen on reliving more than he already did.

"i'm just saying," sam raises his hands in defeat. "you stopped fighting before you even had to."

"it wasn't like that," bucky insists, still watching the doorway you left through.

"so what was it like?" sam wonders. "the right person, wrong time?"

"something like that."

"and now you're pretending to be friends."

"we are friends," bucky doubles down. "we've always been friends."

sam quirks an eyebrow. "and how exactly are you friends?"

“what do you mean?"

"you two don't hang out anymore. you don't laugh together anymore. you don't have anything in common."

"we have plenty of things in common.” like the fact that you’re both still in love with each other.

sam grips bucky's shoulder, offering a comforting, grounding squeeze, "all i'm saying, you were so worried about losing her. but take a look, buck, you lost her anyway."

there isn't anything that bucky can say to that. not as he ambles back to his date. sam's words hit him like a ton of bricks. isn't that exactly what he was worried about? losing you. and isn't that exactly what happened? friends to lovers. lovers to strangers. strangers masquerading as friends.

there's a longing look on his date's face that he's sure wasn't there just a moment ago.

bucky gives his date a sheepish, apologetic smile, "sorry, i had to-"

his date looks over bucky's shoulder to find you finally talking to sam. a wistful smile tugs at the corner of her mouth. "that's her, isn't it?"

"huh?"

"the reason why we'll only ever be friends. it's her, right?"

for the second time tonight, bucky is rendered speechless. his mouth gapes for a moment, debating the merit of lying. it's not worth it. by the looks of it, his date has seen right though him. "yeah, that's her."

she juts her chin towards you. "you should go after her."

bucky quirks an eyebrow. "i should?"

"you should," she agrees. "i understand. and to be honest, you just reminded me that i deserve to have someone look at me the way you look at her."

"you do deserve that, but no, we, uh, we didn't work out. we're just friends now," bucky states, more as a reminder to himself than to inform his date.

she softly snorts, rolling his eyes, "i know i'm the stranger here, but i don't think you'll ever be just friends with her."

"i'm sorry."

she waves him off. "i'll be fine, but it looks like she's leaving, you should go."

it was the kick in the ass he needed and the second one he'd gotten tonight. bucky nods, "thank you."

the door slams shut behind you as you step into the nighttime air. your lungs painfully expand then clench as you take your first real breath of the night. something about watching the person you thought you'd have a lifetime with stand with another woman was just too painful.

it didn't matter what you promised him all those months ago. sure, you'd pretend. you'd keep up the facade. but you knew down to the depths of your bones that you couldn't be friends with someone you still loved with your entire heart.

"hey!" bucky calls after you.

you jolt at the sound of his voice, schooling your face into a soft smile as you whip around to face him. "what are you doing out here?"

"funny, i was about to ask you the same thing," he half heartedly chuckles, stopping less than a foot away from you. just out of reach. the corner of your mouth twitches up in the most sincere smile you can muster in this moment. it only makes his heart ache even more. "i'm really sorry about tonight."

"it's fine. we're friends, right?" your words are so stilted that you're not even fooling yourself anymore. there's a long, drawn out silence. the silence is your answer. you weren't friends. you couldn't even pretend. it was too soon. perhaps it would always be too soon. maybe you would always love him. but you and bucky would never be just friends. "we can't be friends, can we?"

he takes a long step forward. the familiar smell of your perfume wraps around him like a warm blanket on a blistery day. he looks at you and he can't even remember why he thought you could ever be friends. it doesn't make an ounce of sense to him anymore.

his hand twitches with the urge to touch you, to feel you once more.

how could he be so foolish?

how could you be friends when the taste of you still lingered on his lips? when he could still feel your warmth on your side of his cold bed? when his heart still called out to you with each rising morning and setting sun?

he finally caves to his most base, most desperate desire to simply touch you again. his thumb drags over your bottom lip. "no, we can't."

Bucky Barnes Masterlist AnonymityIsFun Masterlist

As always, let me know what you think! Reblogs and comments are always appreciated! 💛

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catmiemy · 6 days

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Another Chance to Live Part 1 (Ana Maria Crnogorčević x Reader)

Summary: Ana and you are both struggling with unwanted transfers, but maybe you can at least find happiness off the pitch.

A/N: This is the first part of a story I've been working on for a while. I guess my way of processing my emotions about Ana's transfer. I've been in the denial stage for a long time 😅

The next two chapters are already written (just need to edit them) and so far it's a total of about 13k words. I'm now at a crossroad which will decide how long the story becomes. So I thought I'd publish the first part and see how much interest there is in a story like this to help me decide.

It felt like a cruel joke of the universe that now, now when you had been forced to leave, the woman you’ve had a crush on for years, joined your team, or well your former team. Words that made your heart crack a little more every time you thought them. Never in a billion years had you expected your team to become your former team.

Ever since you had first laid eyes on Ana you had been dazzled by her, not necessarily only by her looks, although you definitely enjoyed them, but also by her personality and her aura. She always radiated so much kindness and positive energy. It was impossible not to be drawn to her.

Sadly your paths didn’t cross all too often and when they did, Ana was always somewhere in the heart of whatever group you were part of, while you were lingering on the edges, looking in. So the Swiss woman was probably only vaguely aware of your existence, while you soaked up every detail you could find about Ana. The more you learnt, the more you liked her.

And yes, sometimes when you lay in bed at night you made up little scenarios how the two of you would meet. One of your favorite ones was Ana coming to Atleti, not really knowing her way around Madrid yet, so you take her under your wing and show her everything. And of course she starts falling for you as you spend so much time together. It was your imagination after all, so you could day dream all you wanted.

Now part of this little fantasy was actually coming true, Ana really was joining Atlético, and it frustrated you to no end that now that she came, you were gone. Although perhaps it wasn’t the universe being cruel towards you, maybe it was protecting you because even if you played for the same team there was no way the Swiss woman would ever go for someone like you.

Still, you spent a good amount of time fuming about it in your apartment. Possibly also because it was easier to focus on that rather than on the fact that your childhood club had just dropped you like you meant nothing. Every time you remembered the conversation with the club’s managers you felt like throwing up, hiding under the covers for the rest of your life, and ripping off your ears so you didn’t have to listen to one more word from them. So yeah, it was comforting in a weird way to think about your missed chance with Ana, especially since it never had been much of a chance anyway.

It was harder to hold on to that strange comfort when training actually started and you had to go to Real Madrid’s training center every day. Most days were spent attempting to do your best and keep your negative emotions in check, while thinking nonstop about how much you hated this, how much you wanted to return to Atelti, how much you wanted to leave Madrid altogether.

So all in all you weren’t having the best time, barely getting by was actually a more accurate way to describe it. Then a few weeks after the season started you got a call from Lola.

“Sooo I heard you’re doing a lot of moping these days,” she teased you.

However there was an underlying note of worry in her voice. You had done your best to pretend as if Atleti’s decision hadn’t hurt you, that these things happen in football, and you were completely fine with it, but Lola had seen right through it.

“I’m not moping, I’m just quiet and focused like usual,” you quickly defended yourself. It was only partially true, you hated every single second you spent at the training center of Real Madrid.

“That’s not what I’ve heard, but how about you convince me over a cup of coffee. Maybe tomorrow afternoon?”

You didn’t even question how Lola knew that you had the day off tomorrow, apparently she had some spies at Real. As much as you didn’t want to continue talking about the misery that was your new club, you did want to see your friend, so you agreed.

“I might ask some other people if they want to tag along. Everyone misses you,” Lola continued, making you happy and sad at the same time. It was nice to be missed, but you wished you weren’t in a position where you could be missed.

Before you could hang up, Lola told you to bring “your moping buddy Misa”, then she ended the call with a cackle, not giving you any chance to retaliate. In all honesty there was some truth to it, both you and Misa were unhappy at Real, so it wasn’t surprising that she was the only person you had really bonded with so far.

Going by Lola’s words you expected a big group the next day when you entered the café you had agreed upon. What you found however were merely three people, Lola, Misa and no one other than Ana.

Suddenly your stomach was filled with butterflies flapping their wings wildly, making you somewhat nauseous as a result. You hadn’t expected this and you weren’t prepared for it at all. If it wouldn’t have been incredibly rude you would have walked right back out of the café.

Instead you walked over to the small group, doing your best impression of a friendly smile. You could have sworn you saw a knowing glint in both Misa’s and Lola’s eyes. There was no way they knew about your crush though, right?

Lola jumped up when she saw you, hugging you tightly. “It’s good to see you, chica, I’ve missed you,” she told you.

You had to blink a couple of times to chase away the tears burning in your eyes. There was no denying that you had missed her too, all of your former teammates really. You longed to be back at Atlético, and not only because Ana was there.

Right, Ana.

You extracted yourself from your friend and smiled at the blonde. Should you hug her as well? Or greet her with kisses on the cheeks? That’s exactly why you should have been informed that Ana would be there, so that you could think this over beforehand. Or, well, over think it.

Unlike you Ana knew exactly what to do; she got up, greeted you kindly and gave you a quick hug. “It’s nice to see you again, Y/N. We’ve never had much of a chance to talk, so I’m glad we get one now.”

For a few seconds too long you started at her. You were torn between awe, and a little bit of envy, at how easily the Swiss woman had navigated this greeting, and shock. She remembered you? She was happy to see you? Once your heart slowed down from a wild canter to a moderate gallop and your brain was working more clearly again, you realized that this was probably just something Ana had said to make the situation less awkward, not something she truly meant.

“So, do you want to sit down?” Lola suggested with a smirk on her face. Thankfully she left it at that though and you quickly sank down into a chair. You felt too embarrassed to look at Ana, so you completely missed the reassuring smile she sent your way.

After that things went much more smoothly, mostly because Lola and Ana carried the conversation, allowing you and Misa to remain in your preferred role, attentive listener. Your former teammate as well as your crush tried valiantly to draw you out of your shell, but out of fear of saying something stupid, you kept your answers as short as possible without being weird or unfriendly. If only you could think of something witty to say!

On the bright side your relative quietness gave you a good opportunity to study Ana. She was stunning as always, but you could easily spot the signs of the toll this move to the Atlético had taken on her; her smile wasn’t quite as wide as usual and didn’t reach her eyes, her voice was a little duller, there were badly covered up dark bags underneath her eyes and she was a bit more subdued than normal in general. Man, you really had spent way too long looking at any video of her you could find to notice things like that!

Then all of the sudden Misa let out a gasp. “I completely forgot I promised my neighbor I’d let in her daughter today. I need to leave right now to make it.”

You frowned at your teammate; it wasn’t like her to forget something as important as that. Was something more than her unhappiness with being stuck at Real bothering her? You made a mental note to ask Misa about it the next day, remind her that you were always there if she needed someone.

Misa’s departure didn’t really change anything in the dynamic, she hadn’t contributed much just like you. But then Lola got a phone call from her girlfriend who apparently needed your former teammate urgently. She looked at the two of you apologetically, however you could swear that there was some glee shimmering behind her regretful front.

“You girls should stay here and enjoy the rest of the afternoon. Really I’m so sorry about this, don’t let it ruin your day,” Lola babbled, pressing a kiss to both your and Ana’s cheek before dashing out of the café.

You looked after her with confusion. The confusion however was short-lived, quickly drowned out by panic once you realized that you were now left alone with Ana. No more hiding behind other people, no more safety net. You weren’t ready. However leaving also wasn’t an option, there was no way you could do so without offending Ana, so you had to pull yourself together.

“I’m sorry about that,” Ana apologized, bringing your confusion back. As far as you were aware the Swiss woman had absolutely nothing to apologize for.

“They probably planned this because they think I need to be more social again. I wouldn’t be surprised if Jenni put them up to it, she’s been pretty worried,” the Swiss woman specified, leaving you reeling because you didn’t know how to deal with that much honesty.

“Oh,” you replied, praying that some more words would enter your brain. “Maybe they also did it for me. They think I’m pretty antisocial in general,” you finished, kicking yourself for making yourself look even more pathetic than you already did.

To your surprise Ana didn’t seem put off; on the contrary she chuckled and said, “Well we can be antisocial together then.”

The Swiss woman using the word ‘together’ in reference to the both of you made you feel all warm and fuzzy inside, you could definitely get used to that.

In an attempt to take control of the situation and not end up blurting out something stupid if Ana asked you a question, you inquired how she was liking Madrid so far. It seemed like a normal thing to ask someone that had just moved to a new place.

However the Swiss woman didn’t answer right away, which was atypical for her who always seemed to have a reply ready. That combined with the guarded look in her eyes made you realize that this wasn’t a safe and easy topic for her. In your rush to make sure nothing that would be complicated for you came up, you had totally forgotten that Ana’s own move to Madrid had been anything but a happy occurence. Way to be selfish!

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry. Forget I said anything, that was such a stupid thing to say,” you apologized frantically

“No, don’t worry, it’s fine,” Ana quickly reassured you. “I just don’t really know what to say. Obviously I didn’t want to come here, I miss Barcelona. Both the city and the team. So I’m not having the best time to be completely honest. Then again I also haven’t given Madrid much of a chance yet. So…”

The Swiss woman’s openness left you stunned once again. This could never be you, sharing your thoughts and feelings so freely. At the same time you noticed with a surge of excitement and dread that Ana’s explanation gave you a good opening, not unlike your daydreams in fact.

Your fear of being annoying and overstepping was battling hard against your longing to get to spend more time with the blonde in the future. In the end you decided to go for it, maybe Ana would appreciate it and if she didn’t want to hang out again, she could just say so. Of course there was still the fear of rejection holding you back, but you shoved that to the back of your mind. If you didn’t ask the answer would always be no, right?

“If you want to I could show you around Madrid sometime. I’ve lived here all my life so I know the place like the back of my hand and know some nice places. Totally fine if you don’t of course, I’m sure there are many other people that could show you around.”

You spoke in record speed, making it hard for Ana to follow, which was why it took her a moment to answer. These few seconds were some of the most horrible ones in your life. If she said no now all your hopes would be shattered once and for all. Everyone always said it was important to know so you could move on, but honestly if the Swiss woman didn’t want to spend any time with you, you didn’t want to know.

“That sounds great, I’d love to,” Ana replied once she had enough time to process your jumble of words.

“Really?” You double checked, the words out of your mouth before you could stop yourself.

“Yeah, definitely,” the Swiss woman confirmed with a gentle smile. A smile that you returned happily. You hadn’t felt this excited in a while, it was a nice change from the bleakness that had become your constant companion.

The rest of your time together was spent chatting easily. You weren’t a great conversationalist, however with Ana it came much more natural. The blonde definitely did the heavy lifting, but you were happy with your own contributions. You even made her laugh a few times!

Later that day when you were back in your apartment you were much more critical, taking apart every single thing that you had said and coming to the conclusion that you must be the stupidest person on the planet. Thankfully you were going to get another chance in a few days and this time you would be better prepared. You would say interesting things and you would make sure Ana had a great time. The blonde deserved some joy and happiness and you would do your best to give her that.

Before your next meeting with Ana you actually made a plan; you would make a list of her interests and think of possible questions, some jokes and interesting facts you could mention. You spent one evening on it, working furiously and then you realized what you were doing, feeling very foolish all of the sudden. You scrunched up the piece of paper and threw it into the trash with some force.

This was pointless and unnecessary and totally embarrassing! Maybe you weren’t the best at coming up with things to say on the spot, but rehearsing everything like this was a role in a play was stupid. The urge to do absolutely everything to get Ana to like you was huge, however is she only liked this carefully crafted version of you that wasn’t any better than her not liking you at all.

Also, you shouldn’t even attempt to get the Swiss woman to like you. Just like you should keep your own crush in check. Ana’s life was complicated enough at the moment, you didn’t need to add your infatuation into the mix.

Unfortunately your noble plan to ignore your crush failed miserably. Whenever you spent time with Ana you fell a little more for her. It was simply impossible not to when she was the kindest, funniest, most interesting and on top of that most beautiful person in the world.

Like when you were out and about on one of your strolls to the city and a young couple approached you, asking if you could take a picture of them. As was typical for you, you hesitated for a moment; not necessarily because you didn’t want to, but because your mind was already working in overdrive, supplying you with every possible negative outcome.

Ana on the other hand smiled at them. “Of course! Where do you want to take it?”

And then she proceeded to take several pictures of the two, showing them to the couple, and when they weren’t completely satisfied yet, she even offered her own suggestions on how they might turn out even better.

All the way you were just watching them, well mostly Ana, with a goofy smile. You loved how much she cared, how much effort she put into random people she didn’t even know. No wait, you didn’t love that, you liked that, admired it.

Or when Ana convinced you to go into a tiny café. A place you would have never frequented on your own because the intimacy of it freaked you out. Not the blonde though. Within seconds she began chatting with the owner, a middle-aged woman who was thrilled someone showed so much interest in her small establishment.

The cake you got was very tasty as was the coffee and the homemade ice tea. You were quick to admit that Ana had made a good decision by forcing you to go there.

However what really pulled at your heartstring was that the Swiss woman went up to the owner afterwards and asked if it was okay to post about this place on Instagram. The poor woman almost started crying out of happiness and thanked Ana profusely, while the blonde kept insisting that this was nothing and really it should be her thanking the owner.

So it was safe to say that you fell deeper and harder every time you saw Ana. But it was okay, you had a foolproof way to make sure that the blonde didn’t figure it out and therefore her life didn’t get disrupted because of you. Whenever you echoed a statement Ana had made about how much she liked hanging out with you or that she thought you were a great person, you always added ‘friend’ into the mix; “I enjoy hanging out with you too, you’re such a great friend.” and “Aw thank you. You’re one of the best people and friends I know too!”

Sometimes when you were feeling particularly hopeful you wondered if the lack of specification on Ana’s part meant that she liked you as more than a friend. You always discarded the idea quickly though. It was much more likely that the thought of being more than friends was so ludicrous to the blonde, something that had probbly never even grazed her mind, that she didn’t feel the need to explicitly state it.

Despite having to resign yourself to the fact that Ana didn’t like you like that, it still made you happy that she was usually in a good mood when you were hanging out. Something you were secretly very proud of. Still every once in a while her sadness shined through, for example when she heard someone speak Catalan or when she saw something that reminded her of Barcelona.

One time a group of fans came up to her. They were friendly and excited and the Swiss woman matched their energy effortlessly. But then one of them mentioned how sad they were that Ana wasn’t playing for Barça anymore. You were forced to watch the blonde deflate slightly after that thoughtless statement. She was good at pretending though, so the fans were none the wiser.

When they were gone you gathered all of your courage. Up until now you had stayed in the shallows of easy conversation so this was a first and once again you worried about overstepping. But when you saw Ana’s sad eyes and the forcefully pulled up corners of her mouth, you couldn’t stay silent.

“Do you want to talk about it? I mean your transfer from Barça? I know we haven’t really talked about that or othe serious things yet, but I’m always happy to listen. I’m actually pretty good at that.”

The Swiss woman sighed, rubbing a hand over her face.

“That’s very sweet but honestly I’ve been talking so much about it lately. Sometimes it feels like it’s the only thing anyone wants to talk about anymore. So if it’s okay with you could we just continue like before? The distraction has been helping a lot.”

You had been helping! Happiness flowed through you and your smile was maybe a bit bigger than was warranted for a situation like this. However unless Ana was studying you as intently as you always studied her, you doubted that the blonde would notice.

“Yeah, of course. I’m happy to help in anyway.”

Ana and you kept seeing each other regularly and it was the undisputed highlight of your current life. Honestly it was a little worrying how few other things brought you any joy, but you didn’t allow yourself to dwell on that.

So when you were put into a situation where you had to cancel on Ana you were devastated. It wasn’t an appropriate reaction to something so small, but you had a ten minute crying session until you could even begin to function properly again. Calling the Swiss woman was out of the question though, you were still chocked up and sniffling.

Instead you texted her, apologizing multiple times and explaining that you were roped into doing all sorts of things last minute for your father’s birthday tomorrow. You could have slapped yourself for not seeing this coming. Sure, your parents had assured you time and time again that everything was taken care of, but you should have known better. Then you could have done it before today and weren’t forced to cancel on Ana.

Only minutes after you had sent the text your phone started ringing with a call from the Swiss woman. With wide, panicked eyes you stared at the screen. In the end your desire to at least hear Ana’s voice if you couldn’t see her won out. Hopefully she wouldn’t notice anything.

„Hey I just saw your text and wanted to ask if I can help out with anything.”

You smiled at your phone, your heart warmed by Ana’s kindness. There was no doubt in your mind that she would actually follow through on your offer. Not that you would ever take it.

“Aw thank you so much, Ana! But it’s okay really. Most things I have to do at my parents place anyway. You know help them clean and decorate. So I’ll be out most of the day, and then in the evening I’ll have to bake the cake. Who knows how that’s going to go.”

You chuckled, even if you were feeling slightly panicked at the idea of baking. Normally your mother was in charge of that, but she had broken her arm a few weeks ago, so that was out of the question. Moments like this made you wish that you had some siblings or some cousins for that matter, just anyone to help you out.

“Not to brag, but I’m actually a great baker. So if you want some help, I’m happy to come over in the evening and help,” the blonde offered.

It would be nice to have some help, and you always wanted to see Ana. Plus she had brought up the idea of her own accord, so surely it was okay, right?

“That would be great actually. Thank you so much,” you replied, not giving your mind any more opportunity to drive yourself crazy.

Ana and you quickly planned everything out before you hung up and left to do everything else. With the prospect of seeing the Swiss woman later today you were a lot more cheerful than before.

“What’s got you so happy?” Your mother asked you while she supervised the decorating process.

It was incredibly frustrating since she kept criticizing everything you did. Every few minutes you had to step away for a moment, take some deep breaths and visualize how your evening with Ana would be, full of laughter and fun conversation.

“Not this, that’s for sure,” you muttered, low enough so that your mothers whose hearing wasn’t the best anymore, couldn’t here you.

“What?”

“Nothing,” you said louder, “I’m just in a good mood, I guess.”

There was no point in bringing up Ana. Nothing would ever happen between the two of you and even after knowing about it for almost ten years your parents still struggled with your sexuality. To avoid unnecessary conflict and awkwardness you never spoke about women you liked unless it was something serious. So never.

“You should focus on decorating and not smile so much. Maybe then we would get somewhere.”

You rolled your eyes, but kept your mouth shut. No point in pointing out that most parents would be happy if their child was happy. And it wasn’t like your mother wasn’t happy about it, she just wasn’t good at being pleasant around you. Somehow she always felt the need to criticize you.

Hours later you got into your car, quickly drove away and as soon as you were a decent distance from your parents’ house you let out a loud scream, releasing all of the built up frustration. Then you set your focus on the near future, on the fact that you would be meeting Ana in half an hour at your apartment. Baking wasn’t really your thing, but baking with the Swiss sounded like a lot of fun. Anything was fun with her really; just being around her made you so happy.

When you got to your apartment Ana was already waiting for you, leaning against her car. A big smile appeared on the blonde’s face when she saw you and she waved at you happily. It warmed your insides, swept away any remnant of frustration from the long day with your parents, seeing how excited Ana was to see you.

You got set up quickly, putting out all the ingredients and opening up the recipe you had settled on. Then you turned to the Swiss woman expectantly.

“So any baking pro tips from you before we start?” You asked teasingly.

Ana looked at you sheepishly.

“To be completely honest I don’t really know that much about baking. I usually only bake once a year to make some Christmas cookie,” the blonde admitted, scratching her nose.

You frowned at her in confusion. This didn’t really make any sense to you, but you didn’t want to make Ana feel bad about it.

“So why did you say you did?” You asked carefully. „I mean only if you want to tell me, it’s totally fine if you don’t. I’m sure you had your reasons.”

The Swiss woman blushed a little as she explained herself, “I really just wanted to spend some time with you today.”

Your heart started racing at this confession, your hopes going through the roof. It didn’t take long for the logical part of your brain to bring you back to earth though. Surely this didn’t mean what you wanted it to mean. Most likely Ana was just struggling today and didn’t want to be alone.

“Oh I’m sorry you’re having a hard time today. You know you can always tell me that and if it’s possible at all I’ll always make time for you. You don’t have to make up reasons to hang out.”

Ana stared at you with a pained expression. It hurt your heart to see her in pain and it made you wonder if something had happened today, perhaps something that reminded her of Barcelona?

“Do you want to talk about it?” You asked when the blonde stayed quiet, but then you thought better of it. “Wait no I’m sorry, you already said that you’re tired of talking about it before and that you prefer a distraction. So let’s bake!”

You put some extra excitement into your voice and made sure to keep up a stream of easy chatter as you got to work. For a while Ana remained a bit distant and quiet, but before too long her smile returned and she began talking and joking.

When the blonde laughed loudly at a joke you had made you felt very proud of yourself for giving Ana what she needed, a distraction. If you continued to be helpful she would keep wanting to hang out with you and that was also very much in your interest. Even if the knowledge that it meant something else to you hurt somewhat every time you thought of it.

However it was all worth it to get to spend time with Ana. Everything was worth that.

#woso x reader #woso imagine #woso fanfics #ana maria crnogorcevic imagine #ana maria crnogorcevic x reader

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talaok · 7 months

Text

The mission

Pairing: Joel miller x reader

Summary: Joel is the boss of a group of criminals in the QZ, and you're his little bunny everyone knows better than to look at, and this time, you wanna help him on a mission.

warnings: smut| the tiniest smudge of fingering, unprotected p in v sex, exhibitionism (yes again. dont look at me) and of course daddy kink

this is the fourth part to this but it can be read alone

"you want to what!?"

"I wanna help" you repeated, leaning back on his desk so you were right in front of where he was sitting.

"no"

"but-"

"absolutely not" he shook his head, not even listening to what you had to say.

You raised an eyebrow, getting ready to stand your ground.

"You need me" you said, making him look up at you, a mix of anxiety and frustration fogging his eyes.

"How would you even know?"

"David told me what you're planning to do"

You watched his fingers grip the edge of his chair to try and relieve some anger.

Fucking David. He was gonna have to teach him a lesson later.

"Still. We don't need you"

You huffed, crossing your arms,

"You need someone to distract the guard"

His eyes shut for a moment as he shrugged

"I've got plenty of men who can do that"

A smug smirk tugged at your lips at his words "And that's exactly the problem"

You watched his brow arch in puzzlement

"You've got men" you explained "But what you need is a woman"

A chuckle fled his lips at your feeble attempt at convincing him "A man can distract a guard just fine, sweetheart"

"Yes" you agreed "But I could do it much better"

He leaned back in his chair, watching you closely.

"you could" he conceded "but not only would you distract the guard, but all my men. Me included"

You had to roll your eyes at that.

That must have been the worst excuse you'd ever heard

"You know I would be good at it" you continued

"I know you would, baby, but you know I can't let you do that" he said, gentler now as his hand reached for your waist to draw slow patterns on it "You're too important, I can't let anything happen to you"

"but nothing has to happen to me, I just gotta distract a guard"

"it's still dangerous" he shook his head, "You've gotta understand baby, I-"

"please" you pouted, looking down at him with the best doe eyes you could muster

"bunny, I can't-"

That hadn't worked, so you had to retort to the only method you knew was fool-proof.

"please" you murmured again, placing your hands on his shoulder as you straddled his lap.

"please Daddy, just this once" you whispered, gently kissing his cheek before making your way to his neck.

"bunny..." he groaned, as his hands betrayed him and reached for your waist "I know what you're doing"

"'m not doing anything" you lied, going as far as grinding your core against his crotch while you kissed him right below his ear "I promise I'll be good"

"fuck- baby this ain't fair" he groaned again, his cock hardening in his jeans

"please daddy" you whimpered, passing a hand through his hair in that way you knew he loved "I'll do whatever you tell me to do" you promised "I'll follow all your instructions" The way your hot breath tickled his skin made him want to forget about everything and just take you right there and them "I'll be real good for you daddy"

And that was it.

He was 100% aware of having just been manipulated, but fuck- if you asked him with that sweet voice of yours, he would have agreed to jump off a cliff without a second thought.

"fuck me- fine" he sighed, inhaling your heavenly scent, as his fingers started already infiltrating underneath your top "But you're gonna do everythin' I tell you to do, ok? I don't wanna hear a single complaint"

Your grin resembled one of a child in a candy store

"yes daddy"

"and I know you don't like 'em but I'm givin' you a gun" he spoke, his attention not on your eyes but on your tits as he groped them underneath the fabric "we'll go over the basics again later" he spoke, before his gaze found yours, suddenly serious.

"and bunny, if anything goes wrong... if even one thing isn't how it's supposed to be, you run." he said "You get the fuck out of there, I don't care if it gets me and all my men killed. You save yourself first, we clear?"

You had to bite down the huge grin spreading on your face to try and at least look like you weren't jumping out of your skin in the excitement.

"Yes daddy" you nodded

"good" he murmured "Now c'mere you fuckin' smartass"

__ __ __

Joel had prepared you for the mission like you were about to go to war, you don't think he'd ever gone that long talking to you without touching some part of your body, and yet he'd spent a whole hour explaining to you what was gonna happen, and how everything was gonna proceed and most importantly, how no matter what, you had to "save yourself first"

But it was dumb really, your job was to do what you'd learned to do since you hit puberty: flirting with men to get what you want.

There's not a lot of ways a girl can survive on her own in a post-apocalyptic world, so the moment you understood the power you and your body held, you started using it to your advantage.

Which is why your task was a walk in the park.

The guard had forgotten all about what he was paid to do, which was paying attention to the security footage, from the moment you walked in, and all you needed to do was to put on a small little skirt and smile at everything he said.

There's only one thing men like more than a woman: a woman in distress.

Which is why you had made up this whole story about being new to the QZ and having gotten lost.

But hey thankfully, you'd stumbled upon this Fedra building and found "such a handsome, smart-looking man" that was more than eager to help you.

Joel and his crew had all the time in the world to steal whatever it was they were stealing, all the while you had fun.

You hadn't felt this ecstatic in years

You were basically skipping as you walked out of the building.

"there you are" you watched Joel breathe a sigh of relief as you walked over to where he was leaning on a black car "you got me scared for a moment bunny"

You frowned, peeking at the watch he'd insisted you wore.

"I was only one minute late"

He shook his head, grabbing your waist with both his hands to force you flush against him "and it was enough" he murmured, ignoring the fact that his whole crew was standing right beside you, and leaning in to kiss you as if he hadn't seen you for days.

You melted right into him, softly whimpering in his mouth when one of his hands traveled lower to grab one of your asscheeks.

You grinned widely as he leaned away, and he couldn't help but smile too watching that look on your face.

"get inside the car" he murmured, leaving another quick kiss on your lips before getting out of the way to open the door for you.

Surprisingly, he wasn't driving this time.

Just as you bent down to get inside, you heard him bark behind you at someone to his right "The fuck are you looking at?"

"N-nothing boss, I'm sorry"

Joel didn't answer, he only removed his hand from where he held his gun and got inside the car with you, shutting the door behind him.

You watched through the windshield, as the poor guy put a hand on his chest, probably checking if it was still beating.

"you scared him" you half scolded, half cooed as you wasted no time scooting closer to him

A soft smirk pulled at his lips as his thumb reached for your cheek to stroke it

"what a shame" he murmured, kissing you.

As the kiss heated, his tongue infiltrating into your mouth as you moaned into his, you felt his hands take hold of your waist to guide you on top of him, and you gladly complied.

"hey there" you smiled

"hey b-"

An awkward cough made its way to both his ears

"Should I... give you some space?" the guy at the wheel asked.

Funny, you hadn't even noticed he was there.

"who's gonna drive the car if you do that?" Joel huffed a laugh

"I just though-"

"start driving" Joel interrupted, already focused on you again "and keep your eyes on the road"

"yes boss"

And just like that, the car was moving.

"You don't mind Pike being here do you bunny? he's very discreet"

"I don't mind daddy" you murmured, not resisting anymore as you latched your mouth to that irresistible neck of his.

Just like every time you were in his arms, his scent and warmth wrapped around you like magic.

"good" he smiled, losing himself in your touch for a moment before he remembered something.

"What was the guy's name bunny?"

"mh?" you frowned, looking up at him confused.

"the guard, darlin', what was his name?"

You arched a brow as your left hand went to his hair as you inspected his face.

"why?" you asked suspiciously

"I'll need to take care of him"

"Daddy he didn't do anything wrong" you whispered, trying to reason with him.

"he looked at you didn't he?"

you couldn't help but roll your eyes "he needed to look at me to be able to talk to me"

"yeah but I'm sure he was doing a lot more than talking in that brain of his"

"daddy" you murmured, as your index finger traced his jaw "you can't kill every guy I come across on every mission "

"every mission? who said this is happening again?" he tilted his head, a soft amusement shining in his eyes

"I did"

"oh bunny," he smiled as he shook his head" this was a one-time thing"

But you both knew it really wasn't up to him.

Yes, he was his crew's boss, but you were the boss's boss.

"we'll see" You shut him up, crashing your mouth with his in a frenzy of clashing teeth and tongues.

The mission had gotten you so worked up you'd been wet since he first kissed you.

You couldn't help but grind on him to relieve some of the tension that had created between your thighs, before losing your patience and just deciding to get to the real thing.

He was groping your ass with one hand while the other busied itself with your tits when your left hand sneaked down his torso to find that hard tent straining from his jeans.

"Actually..." he breathed, as you undid his belt as quickly as you could "If this is what you going on missions gets me, I think I might have to take back what I said "

You let out a small giggle at that, "I thought you might say that"

He smiled too, but his mouth was back on yours as quickly as it had parted, tasting all that you would give him.

You made quick work of his zipper, and eagerly freed his cock from his boxers, making him groan loudly.

"fuck bunny" he breathed, glancing down to where you were stroking his cock with those heavenly soft hands of yours.

The fact that Pike was not even two meters away from you wasn't remotely crossing your minds.

You mimicked him and looked down at his manhood, and god it looked so delicious, but as much as you wanted a taste there wasn't really that much space for maneuver in the back of this car, and to be completely honest there was also the fact that your pussy had been screaming for any type of attention for some time now so-

"spit"

You hadn't even realized his hand was in front of your mouth, but the moment you did, you complied.

You watched as that same now spit-filled hand made its way underneath your skirt and panties in no time.

He slathered the liquid all around your folds, making you squirm uncontrollably, before, without any type of warning, plunging two of his thick fingers deep inside your heat.

"daddy!"

"she's ready" he decided, continuing to watch you as you slowly raised yourself to sink down on his cock.

"o-oh my god" you whimpered as your head fell to the crook of his neck.

He was stretching you so good... and god, but he was so deep

"fuck baby" he groaned, both his hands now on your ass to squeeze it however he pleased, "feel fucking perfect"

You softly smiled at that, kissing up his neck as you started moving with the help of his hands, which guided your movements a bit.

"I was good wasn't I?" you whispered onto his pulse point, before gently sucking on it

"the best" he promised, groaning a bit as you fastened your pace "my precious little bunny" he praised into your ear "always such a good girl"

The sound that was spreading around the car was filthy, but all either of you could think about was the other.

Your fingers were grabbing at the hair at the nape of his neck, while your other hand was grasping his shoulder for dear life as you bounced up and down on his cock.

"jesus you're so tight sugar" he groaned as you bit down on a spot on his neck "So perfect" he continued, watching you pleasure yourself on his dick "So beautiful"

Your clit was grinding against his crotch and it was only making you reach your climax faster

"and so fucking smart" he murmured "You're amazing bunny, you really are"

what before were soft breathy moans whispered in his ear, had now quickly evolved to higher and louder cries that were making poor Pike want to die.

"f-fuck daddy" you whimpered, leaning your forehead onto his to look at him in the eyes

"you coming bunny?"

"mh-mh" was all you could muster

"yeah? then come for me baby" he ordered "Come around my cock"

And just like that, You did, you came, screaming his name at the top of your lungs as your movements got more and more sloppy

"Thank you daddy" was the only coherent sentence that came out of your mouth as your orgasm took over your body

"Whatever you want bunny" he promised, watching mesmerized as you came apart before him "fuck-whatever you want, you know that"

And you did know that, because as he'd proven times and times again, for you, there wasn't one thing he wouldn't do.

if you wanna read more of Bunny and Joel → here

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nikkisheep · 17 days

Text

To Be Alone With You (Part Six)

Anthony Bridgerton x female!Sharma!sister reader

Benedict Bridgerton x female!Sharma!sister reader

Warnings: improper alone time (Ben & reader), sexual tension, me as a writer questioning if I want Ben or Anthony to be the end ship, kissing, male nudity, reader fences Benedict (I know nothing about fencing so I'm sorry if this is bad), semi-smut, handjob, hair pulling

*One of the longer chapters

Summary: You spend more time with a certain Bridgerton brother and start to question whether you could be happy with Benedict rather than Anthony.

Playlist:

Labyrinth by Taylor Swift

If Only by Dove Cameron

Back to the Start by Somo

Dark Paradise by Lana Del Rey (Maybe not a good choice, just depends)

Tag List: @shealuna , @m-rae23 , @littlepeanut03 , @aellabridgerton @sydney-m, @faatxma , @wildthoughtnananna @uraesthete, @themadhattersqueen, @theroyalmanatee, @urfavnoirette, @budugu, @helen06dreamer, @galactict3a, @imagineme2you. @sabii5, @anehkael, @aesthetic0cherryblossom, @lxovesgy, @lemonwithstupidity, @luvwithau, @stvrdustalexx, @jess4rush, @tallrock35, @msrawog

Not many nights had passed since the ball and you were being invited to the Bridgerton house by Daphne, or at least you thought. The days following the ball had been crazy as you were having numerous suitors calling on you because they thought the viscount had forgotten your sister and set his mind on you. Not that it was completely wrong, but you were not talking to Anthony and would not do so until the wedding which was to be in about a month. Not that you were keeping up for when you would have to walk down the aisle, not in a white dress.

Upon your arrival to the Bridgerton home, you were wandering around the house trying to find something interesting. You wandered to the garden and sat under a tree. The refreshing wind cooled you as the tree limbs were shading you away from the harsh sun. You close your eyes and listen to the sounds of nature. Soon, rushed footsteps and shouts had called your attention and you decided to follow it.

---

Benedict and Colin were fencing, and it looked like Colin was winning this match. Benedict was sweating in his fencing uniform and a bead of sweat slowly drips down the side of his face and disappears under his collar.

"Are you going to just stand there and stare or are you going to come over?" Benedict called out, snapping you out of the trance-like state you were in.

"How long have you boys been fencing?" You ask, shielding your eyes from the sun.

"About an hour," Colin smirked, watching you watch Benedict. "I actually have grown quiet tired."

"Would you like me to take over, Mr. Bridgerton?" You asked, hands folded together in front of your waist.

"Do they teach you girls how to fence during your lessons?"

"No, but I have seen my cousins do it."

"You are quiet aware that fencing is a man's sport, Miss Sharma," Benedict said, pushing you. He knew that you would see it as a challenge and it was, the results were exactly what he wanted.

"Rule number one, Mr. Bridgerton, do not underestimate a woman."

Colin mentions your clothing and you realized that it would be harder to move in your dress. You press your lips into a thin line before deciding to walk to the shed. Once inside, you look through the wardrobe inside, finding a pair of fencing clothes. You pull at the buttons of your dress, slipping out of the many layers, including your corset. Putting on the trousers felt odd but they were quite comfortable, more so than your corset.

Coming out of the shed, you walk to the boys again, pushing the leftover shirt into the trousers. You gave them a twirl and beamed brightly.

"Well, don't they fit lovely?" You smiled.

"Yes...yes they do," Benedict looked at the sky, not trying to hide that he couldn't look at you. Your shirt wasn't completely buttoned and Benedict was struggling not to look.

"Are you all right, brother?" Colin asked, a teasing grin creeping onto his face.

"I am quite well, you need not to worry about me brother."

You move closer to him and press you hand against his forehead and felt his temperature. Your breathes mixed in front of you, your chest was practically pressed against his. Benedict's first instinct was to lean in for a kiss, you were intoxicating to him, but as soon as he went to slightly move, he pulled away.

"Shall we return to fencing?" He spoke into the silent garden.

All while Colin was just sitting on the bench, watching the interaction between his brother and the love of his other brother's life.

---

Colin eventually leaves the garden because the heat nearly made him pass out. As you were fencing Benedict, he kept talking as a distraction, and it was working.

"Darling, are you prepared for the art lesson that I have planned for us?" He asked.

"Can't make it, Mr. Bridgerton," You said. "I have a tea party with Daphne. She sent me an invitation letter."

"That was me," He said, tapping you on your left side.

"Benedict, did you invite me here to teach me art or something else?"

The two of you stepped closer, leaving the fencing weapons on the ground. His hands came to rest on your hips, looking around the garden quickly before turning back to you.

"Did you or did you not come here for an art lesson and nothing more?" He asked, dipping his mouth to the underside of your jaw.

"I came here thinking that I would be having tea with your sister," You gasp when his teeth graze your skin. "Benedict, someone will see."

"Let them see," He said. "You should be mine."

Your head tips backwards as his mouth continues the assault on your neck. You let out a moan and he pulls away, placing his index finger over your mouth, making a shhh-ing sound.

"Quiet darling, do you want me to stop?"

You shook you head.

"Words or I will stop."

"I don't want you to stop, Mr. Bridgerton."

His mouth pressed against yours in a searing kiss, lips moving in sync and his hand moves down to your bottom. He walks you over to the bench that Colin had been sitting and he sat you down, bending down to kiss you, never wanting your lips to leave his. You pull back, pressing your hand against his chest and try to catch your breath.

"Stop...stop, we shouldn't do this," You whisper as his mouth chases yours. He is in a kneeling position and his hand is on your hips, covered by your trousers.

"We shouldn't, but we want to and who are we to deny our desires?" He pants.

"Benedict."

---

Making it to his art studio, you laugh at his rain soaked clothes. You were still in your fencing clothes and your dress was in Benedict's hands. You brace yourself against a table, smiling as your hair clung to your face and neck. You were breathtaking in Benedict's mind. How Anthony did not see how truly beautiful you were was beyond him.

"Shall we get to drawing?" He asked, breaking the silence in the cooler room.

"Yes," You said. "I was wondering if I could draw you?"

He nodded and moved to the couch. You shook your head, motioning him to come over to you.

"How do you want me?" He asked, smirking at the fact that you were watching him with such attentive eyes.

"I want you...right here," You moved him to the center of the room, right in front of the window that was lit up by the thunder and lightening from outside.

You moved to the couch to start sketching him, frowning because you could not get his figure right. You walked to him and looked up at him, your noses nearly touching.

"Does sketching me include you being so close to me?"

"I need your shirt off. I need you naked."

"Why?" He asked.

"So I can get a better view of how your body is shaped."

He slowly starts to unbutton his shirt and shrugged it off. Smirking when he noticed your hand instantly reached out to touch his toned chest. He grabbed your sketchbook out of your hands, placing it on the nearest table, and placed them on his warm body. Your mouth opened slightly at the feeling of him. He felt warm, sturdy, and perfect.

His hand was still on yours and he slowly moved it down his chest to his abs to his trousers. You gasped when he moved your hand lower.

"Do you feel what you have done to me?" He asks. "How crazy you have me feeling?"

You nod. Too dumbfounded to say anything.

He moves your hand back up and then completely off him. He takes the button of his trousers into his fingers and pops it out of the hole. He then slowly moves them down his strong, long legs. He then pulls down his underwear. His cock springs up and hits his stomach. He was big. You could tell that the genes in this family were extremely strong. You shook your head and grabbed your sketchbook, instantly drawing what you saw.

"Is this what you wanted?" He asked, his wet hair sticking to his skin. Water droplets were still falling from his head and dripping down his body. The lightening from outside lit up his entire body, making him look like a literal angel.

"This is exactly what I needed." You walked over to him once again, pressing your lips against his. His mouth opened to allow your tongue entrance, swallowing his moans of pleasure. You were doing that to him. You were making him needy for you. You were making him want you, he needed you.

You grip his leaking cock, slowly moving up and down, feeling the silky skin. He threw his head back in pleasure as your hand stroked him.

"Oh my..." He gasped.

"Is this what you need, Mr. Bridgerton?" You look up at him before grabbing his hair to pull him down to your level. "Is this what you need?"

"Y-Yes," He stutters as he tries to hold in his moans.

"Let me hear you, baby." Your hand starts to get more slick with his pre-cum as he gets closer and closer to his end. He starts to shake in your hands as you speed up your hand. He starts to curse and moans started to spill from his mouth.

"Oh fuck, darling," He moans out as he cums on your hand.

You kept pumping him as he shakes from his orgasm. You slowly come to a stop and look him straight in the eyes as you lick his cum off your hand and moan at the taste, eyes rolling back.

"Oh fuck..." He pants, hair sticking to his forehead.

"I love you," He whispers, you don't hear it and he quickly gathers himself up.

"How was your drawing?" He asked, once dressed. His hands were resting on your hips as he presses a quick kiss to your neck.

"I think I will need to finish it a different day."

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