#bucky barnes x f!reader
Oh oh what about Bucky's little staying over at Steve's for the weekend cause Bucky is busy. She's being a brat but whenever Steve calls Bucky to show him she's a Angel. So Bucky sneaks by unexpected & sees her being a brat
Word Count: 2,901 (i tried to cut it short, i tried, but i'm hopeless when it comes to soft stuff)
Warnings: ddlg dynamics, and angst i think? the rest is fluff
A/N: Nonnie, thank you so much for sending this and sharing your idea with me. i hope i didn't take too long and i hope i didn't disappoint?:" please enjoy xx.
“Give her the phone, would you? I missed her,” Bucky requested, desperate to hear the little one's voice.
“Quick question while I still have you though,” Steve scratched the back of his head, not sure if he should tell Bucky.
“What do you usually do with her if she's being a little.. troublesome?” Steve didn't want to get her punished; he just wanted a way to deal with her behavior.
Steve obviously knew he could punish her the small punishments, like no screen time for a day or a timeout, but he didn't want to. She already seemed to dislike him enough, he wasn't about to make it worse. He didn't want to punish her but he also couldn't take all the brattiness and backtalk.
He was a kind uncle and he actually enjoyed being around her. But her behavior has been driving him crazy this time and it needed to stop. He knew she didn't want Bucky to leave this time and was most likely punishing Steve for telling him he could take care of her while he was gone. She probably thought Bucky would've stayed if there was no one to tend to her during his absence, and she had Steve to blame for it.
“Being what? What did she do?” Bucky's angry voice asked from the other side of the phone, and Steve could picture him narrowing his eyes.
“It's nothing major, Buck-”
“What did she do, Steve?”
“Well, uh, for starters she says no to almost everything even if she's eventually gonna do it anyway. She knocks stuff over when I don't do what she wants and pretends it was an accident,” Steve stopped and sighed, “she's giving me a hard time and it all goes away when you call!” Steve almost whined.
He sighed again when Bucky went silent, knowing she'd really get it now but she didn't exactly leave him much of a choice.
“I'm gonna handle it. I'm sorry, Steve,” Bucky said, sounding pissed.
“Hey, it's all good. Hold on, I'll give her the phone.”
“Yeah, please do.” Bucky wasn't as excited to talk to her anymore.
He could hear Steve softly calling out for her to come talk to Daddy and her feet hitting the wooden floor as she came to the phone. What he didn't hear though was a thank you to Steve.
“Dada!” Her happy voice spoke and Bucky couldn't help but smile a little.
“Hey, doll! How've you been?”
“Been good, dada. Missed you,” she sighed, pouting.
“I missed you too, baby. Are you behaving for Uncle Steve?”
“Yes, daddy,” she lied all too quickly and Bucky clenched his jaw.
“Sweetheart, please get in your skirt,” Steve sighed again, holding the item of clothing low for her to step into.
“No.” Her naked leg kicked the mini skirt from Steve's hands before she crossed her legs and leaned on her bed.
“Don't make this hard now!” Steve rubbed his face in frustration.
“I'll do what I want. You're not my daddy,” she said stubbornly before snatching the skirt off the floor and slipping it up her legs to her waist. If she looked messy, she didn't care.
When she turned around to leave the unorganized room, Bucky was standing there with the biggest scowl on his face. Her heart stopped and her world froze. How come they didn't know he was arriving today? How come they didn't hear him come in?
“Dada,” she whispered in mixed fear and shame, making Steve look up, a look of utter relief washing over him when he saw his best friend.
Everything was about to get better now that Bucky was here, including her temper.
“Is that what I taught you, little one?” Bucky's tone dripped of disappointment.
“Dada.” Tears quickly came to her eyes as she saw the letdown look in Bucky's.
“And here I was thinking you were my good girl, returning home early to see you.” Bucky shook his head at her.
“Dada, I am your good girl. I am,” she begged, walking closer to him, but Bucky didn't reciprocate.
“Dada, I missed you.” She went to hug Bucky but he stepped away. She tried to hold his hand and he slipped his fingers out of her grab.
“You don't get to welcome daddy home after you've disrespected Uncle Steve like that, little girl,” Bucky told her, his frown not disappearing, only deepening.
“Dada, I'm sorry.” Her lower lip trembled.
She’s missed Bucky so much. She was touch-starved because she hadn't given Steve a chance to come anywhere near her all weekend. She refused to let him hug her, kiss her, or carry her. She was distant and bratty and rude. She needed Bucky's warm touch but he was far too mad at her.
“I'm not the one you should be apologizing to.” Bucky crossed his arms, looking at Steve behind her.
“Uncle Steve, I'm s-sorry,” she mumbled quickly, without even looking at the blond man, moving to hug Bucky again but he still wouldn't let her.
“Dada,” she called, tears leaving her eyes.
“You have to mean it, little one.”
“Daddy, I mean it,” she whined. It frustrated her little heart that Bucky kept calling her little one. He only did that when he was mad at her; too angry to use a pet name.
“Enough lying already!” Bucky raised his voice and she flinched.
“I'm not going to talk to you or touch you until you've made it up to Uncle Steve. Until then I'm gonna pretend I haven't come home and saw what I just saw.” Bucky left her room, walking over to his and slamming the door behind him.
He didn't normally choose to be hard on her; she was his baby doll, but what she did with Steve was just unacceptable. Bucky couldn't let her get away with disrespecting anyone, especially Steve, not after witnessing it all himself.
He'd thought it over on his way home. If he spanked her or took her favourite things away, she'd dislike Steve even more, if not hate him. Bucky couldn't give her more things to blame Steve for or more reasons to refuse him.
“Sweetheart,” Steve called, feeling bad after Bucky left and she stood by the door frame and started crying.
He didn't really want Bucky to punish her; he just wanted to know how to deal with her bratty behavior. He just wanted a way to communicate better. Steve never intended on making her cry. Bucky surprised him with that punishment.
“'S all because of you. I hate you!” She cried harder, throwing herself on her bed to hide her face in the mattress as she sobbed.
Her words broke Steve's heart to tiny pieces and he felt even worse now that Bucky was here. His mouth opened but no words came to him so he closed it again. He gathered her clothes from the floor and hung them back in her closet before leaving her to cry it out, giving her some time.
“I'm so sorry, Steve.” Bucky shook his head, embarrassed by her behavior towards his best friend.
“Hey, it's alright. I know she's a good girl; she just missed you.”
“You know I missed her too but she can't just get away with such stuff,” Bucky sighed, taking another sip from his beer.
“Dada.” She entered the room after a good crying session, rubbing her puffy eyes.
True to his previous words, Bucky didn't answer her, swallowing the lump in his throat with his beer. He couldn't give in.
“What is it, sweetheart?” Steve responded instead, not wanting to leave her hanging, which made her pout in annoyance.
Like him and Bucky had agreed, if she wanted anything she'd have to go to Uncle Steve for it and relearn to use her manners.
“Dada,” she called again and got the same reaction. Bucky pretended he wasn't there.
Tears gathered in her eyes again and she hid her face in her hands and began crying. The sound shook Bucky's heart and he almost broke and forgave her.
“Hey, hey, no, it's alright,” Steve cooed, immediately coming to her side.
He hated this. Once he got her to stop crying he was going to talk to Bucky about calling it off. He didn't care if she was bratty or bad-mannered, he just wanted her happy again.
Steve led her back to her room and sat down on the bed beside her.
“Daddy's never gonna speak to me again!” She sobbed and Steve's heart ached for her.
“Sweetheart, please don't cry.” He gently patted her back.
“Can't you just tell him I said sorry and I mean it?” A pair of teary eyes implored Steve's blue ones.
“I will, but no more tears, okay?” Steve quickly agreed, wanting her to calm down.
“You will?” She wiped at her cheeks and Steve nodded with half a smile, his thumb catching her new tears.
“You'd lie to daddy for me?” Her red eyes widened.
“I'd do lots of stuff for you.” Steve chuckled.
“Like what?” She mumbled, sniffing and wiping her nose before Steve grabbed her a tissue off the bedside table.
“Like let you pour your milk on me and pretend it was an accident.” Steve smiled fondly, dabbing the tissue on her wet cheeks and under her nose.
In that moment as she looked up at the man with tear-filled eyes, her little mind seemed to recall all the ways she'd tortured him all week. She'd disobeyed nearly everything he'd told her and he still didn't hurt her or even raise his voice at her. She'd 'accidently' dumped all the salt in the salt shaker on his dinner. She'd dropped his phone on the kitchen counter multiple times after talking to Bucky, adding to the cracks on its screen. She'd wet him and got soap in his eyes during shower time. She'd constantly knocked stuff out of his hands whenever he held them out for her. She's been a real demon. If it was Bucky he would've punished her in every way in the book. But Steve didn't. He didn't make her pay for any of it and he was ready to lie to Bucky to save her bratty, ungrateful ass from having to endure his silent treatment.
“And then you leave?” She wondered.
She saw Steve's face fall at her question. She really did hate him, didn't she?
“And then I leave.” He still nodded with a kind smile.
“But could you not though?” She whispered, playing with the ends of her mini skirt.
“What?” Steve looked at her in surprise; he must've heard her wrong.
“Don't leave,” she told him, clearer this time, awkwardly extending her hand to touch his.
“I'm sorry, Uncle Steve,” she started tearing up again in regret, “I didn't mean to be so bad.” She shook her head and cried.
“Aw, sweetheart, it's okay.” Steve hugged her to his side, smoothing a hand on her head.
That was all he needed to hear.
“You know I like you, right?” She asked, sniffing in his shirt and Steve chuckled.
“Yeah?” He asked cheekily and she nodded, silently crying.
“Yeah, you make the best cookies, but don't tell daddy,” she said and Steve chuckled, “I'm sorry.” She cried more.
“I like you too, darling. Don't cry now, we're good.” He assured her, holding her closer to him and gently patting her back.
“So you’ll stay?”
“If that's what you want.” Steve's thumb wiped her tears away as she nodded again.
She wanted to make things up to Uncle Steve like Daddy wanted and Uncle Steve deserved. She wanted to show him she truly was a good girl.
“On one condition though,” Steve said playfully, slipping her hair behind her ear.
She looked up at him, waiting for his next words.
“You let me take care of you like I was supposed to.” Steve's face was serious. It was all he wanted all weekend.
“Okay.” She nodded, smiling tearfully.
How kind was Uncle Steve and how blind was she to not see it!
Steve kissed her forehead and smiled down at her, wiping the rest of her tears away. He adjusted her skirt before they walked back out hand in hand and he sat her down on the couch beside Bucky, who on his turn pretended she wasn't there.
Was Bucky curious about what happened in there? Yeah, he was. But he wasn't about to ask her. He was just glad Steve has got her to stop crying because nothing hurt more than seeing her pretty face all sad and teary.
Steve prepared her snack and came back. He lifted her on his lap and handed her the plate before grabbing the remote to turn on her favourite afternoon show.
“Thank you, Uncle Steve,” she whispered shyly, kissing the man's cheek.
Steve smiled and kissed her temple, rubbing her back as he encouraged her to eat, even feeding her a couple of times and she let him, thanking him every time.
Bucky raised an eyebrow at the scene unfolding beside him but still held back from interfering or interacting with her. He was still mad and she needed to prove herself good again. He bit back a smile, pressing the beer bottle to his lips instead.
As the day came to an end and Steve put her to bed, she was keeping her 'please' and 'thank you's up, using her manners just right and Bucky would secretly, proudly grin every time she did.
“Would you please tell daddy I said goodnight?” She asked Steve, trying not to cry again before bed. She'd wished he'd forgive her by bedtime but he clearly didn't.
“I will, sweetheart. And I'm sure he wishes you a good night too,” Steve pecked her forehead and she smiled.
“Goodnight, Uncle Steve.” She pecked his cheek before resting back, pulling the covers to her chin.
If Bucky was listening, he made no effort to let any of them know.
The next morning Bucky was the same, still giving her a taste of her own medicine. She wanted to cry again but didn't, focusing on fixing things with Uncle Steve, whom she'd been awful to.
“Uncle Steve, please come with me?” She held onto Steve's wrist while he stood with Bucky in the kitchen.
Steve mumbled a 'sure', tilting his head in confusion as he followed the shorter girl.
She sat him on her bed and stood on her tiptoes till she reached her pink piggy bank on the upper shelf on her wall.
She walked to Steve and put the small safe in his lap, “I thought all morning long,”
“What's this, sweetheart?” Steve eyed the object before looking at her.
She smiled sheepishly before shaking the safe left and right in his lap, “to fix Uncle Steve's phone.”
Steve's heart soared in his chest and he remained speechless. She waited for him to take the money but he didn't.
“'S a lot of money. Dada gave me some to keep with piggy every day,” she assured Steve, taking his big hands and wrapping them around the pink safe, wanting him to accept it.
“Sweetheart,” Steve mumbled, setting the piggy bank on the bed before holding her to his chest.
She let herself be squished in his embrace as she stood between his legs, not really understanding what was happening, but at least he wasn't mad at her.
“You don't have to do that.” Steve shook his head before kissing her head.
“But I wanna make it up to you, Uncle Steve. I can't take away the salt in your food or the soap in your eyes or the milk on your pants-” She stopped and pulled back and her smaller hand cupped Steve's cheek, “do you wamme to wash your pants?”
Oh, how precious! She spent her morning thinking about ways to fix what she'd done to him. And she wanted to give him all of her savings to fix his phone. She was even ready to try and clean his pants. She was such a kind little one.
He’d done it. She finally likes him. Steve was beside himself at the progress. This kind of connection with her was all he ever wanted and it made him forget about whatever evil things she'd done during that weekend.
And on the other side of the wall stood a very pleased Bucky.
When they walked back out to the living room, Steve was beaming as he helped her up on his lap. Her body was facing Bucky’s as she leaned onto Steve’s chest. She looked at Bucky and when he looked back she cast her eyes down in shame.
“Come here, doll.” Bucky beckoned, opening his arms for her.
She grinned happily, jumping into them as he lifted her to straddle him. She wrapped her arms around Bucky's neck, burying her face in his shoulders and smelling his scent. Steve smiled, satisfied with their reunion.
Bucky wrapped her up tightly in his arms, pressing a longing kiss to the side of her head, “I missed you too, doll. I missed you so bad.”
“I’m sorry, dada,” she sniffled, clutching Bucky’s shirt.
“I know, doll.” Bucky pressed his lips to her forehead and let the kiss linger there.
In each others' arms, now both, her and Bucky, were really home.
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POV: You chose Bucky in the 'Call It A Night' series 🤍
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ultimatum, bucky barnes
— (fem!avenger!reader x tfatws!bucky)
summary; ❝Bucky had almost succeeded in ruefully completing his list of amends. He had almost took to grasping at a form of unintended peace before an all too familiarly fronted name had spilt it’s blood across his relationship. A story in which secrets and lies have piled themselves up and unknowingly lead to an unimaginable form of heartache -- a choice.❞
warnings; fluff, angst, ANGST, mentions of cheating, coarse language, verbal arguments, miscommunication, minor mentions of previous character deaths, idiots in love, flashback scenes, kissing, making out, mwah.
word count; 6381
a/n; hii! my prompt for this fic was the chain by fleetwood mac (i lov this song). this was not supposed to be so damn long but, i always seem to get carried away. here is my submission for @edenslibrary @buckyblues ‘s 4k writing challenge! congratulations you gorgeous human, you deserve the world <3 p.s, the timeline is kinda weird and all over the place ; it’s set during tfatws, 2024, a year after endgame. they live in the avengers tower.
Talking is just a nervous habit.
It is but a semblance of silly fumbles, and exhausting customs – all glum and lonely and sealed off by a stretch of scotch tape. It is a commonly protruding mechanism, a well-oiled machine made up of trembling hands and shaky whispers.
She thought too much, pointless questions mingled with a lingering sense of curiosity – and when she thought, she spoke. She babbled and professed. Divulged and shared. She would stupidly rant on about the most mundane things – an excessive talker by definition. Y/N so wished that she could write the way she spoke, the way she worried; incessantly, obsessively, maddeningly.
She would write herself into an unsettling amount of manuscripts, full of uncaused breakdowns and emotive essays. She would write trilogy after trilogy, create document after document, text after text, and she would surely write about Bucky Barnes more than she should – more than she would want to.
She was genuine, and fair and infuriatingly passionate, but she was not an idiot.
She sat awake, rigid red eyes catatonically glued to the veiling fog that had been gently floating above the rim of her mug. Her coffee was hot – too hot, but she could not be bothered to let it cool. Her tongue was burnt, tastebuds withered and afraid as she watched the sun rise just above the horizon. The wind was loud and angry, threateningly blowing up against the glass panes of the windows that lined the terrace.
He had been lying to her – compulsively.
Had he willingly confessed to withholding the truth from her? No. Was she still ridiculously sure of this hurtful fact? Yes.
Her knees had been pulled up to her chest, the pads of her feet gently rocking her body back and forth as she tried to still her mind.
Where was he? It was 4 o’clock in the fucking morning, and her boyfriend was still nowhere to be found. She was angry and confused, but above all she was worried. Something had to have gone wrong, right?
“Good morning, agent Y/L/N.”
The electronic voice of the A.I shook her from her stupendous daze and jarred her head.
“Good morning, Friday,” she said back, carefully going to retract the steaming cup of coffee away from her mouth. Just as she was about to interrogate the mechanical aid on the breach of Bucky’s whereabouts, the door to the communal living room swung open.
Before the darkened figure could have fully waltzed himself into the flickering halo of light provided to him by the gawky night lamp, Y/N had jumped to her feet, tugging the drawstrings of her pajama pants against each other.
“Where have you been?” She asked urgently, barely aware of the guilty grimace that had taken to decorating the side of the man’s jaw.
Bucky stood there, in the middle of the hallway, his freshly cropped hair damp and curly.
“Training,” he replied gruffly, lividly avoiding her gaze.
She huffed, indecently folding her arms across her chest and looping her fingers around the hem of her shirt, “At four in the morning?”
“At whatever damn time I please.” Ouch. She froze as if he had struck her, the pain grit tone cutting though her skin like a handful of sandy pebbles against a consistently flat tire. “What?”
Bucky turned towards her at the hoarse tamper in her throat, his split lip shining. Their eyes met for no longer than a second – a blissfully reckless moment – before he sullenly dug the heel of his boot into the floor and hurriedly pivoted away towards their room, “I’m tired.” He amended quietly, “we’ll talk tomorrow,” and with that, he had soundlessly slipped himself through the gaps of her fisted fingers yet again.
“You can’t just shut me out, Bucky! You can’t, I won’t let you.”
“I’m not shutting you out.” He silenced, tossing her a half-assed smile, “Good night.”
She couldn’t do it. She could not stand by him in the midst of a fight that he could not have even been bothered to inform her about, “Goodbye.”
He stiffened, “What do you mean, goodbye?” His fidgets were anxious, but he decidedly chose to remain with his sweat-slicked back turned to her.
“I’m leaving,” Bucky felt the air concave his chest, “I need some space, some air – I’ll call Sam.”
He knew, that in that moment, he had absolutely no right to feel so unabashedly betrayed, but the loud coherent buzz of his friend’s name made him snap, “You can’t just leave!” He was yelling now, face red and plashed.
“God, Bucky. What the fuck do you want from me?” She cried back, her hands going up to grip at her hairline, “I can’t keep doing this with you!”
“Doing what?” He knew what she meant; he wasn’t delirious. Y/N felt the back of her knees meet the couch, and she hesitantly went to slide her back to it.
“This back-and-forth thing that we have going on! I can’t do it; I don’t have it in me, not anymore.”
She would not allow for his arrogance to drown her.
He chaffed, beyond annoyed, “I see. So, what then? This is what you’re gonna do? You’re just gonna leave? You’re just gonna walk out that damned door like a coward?”
“You have no right!”
“I have no right?”
“No, you don’t,” her rage was simmering, boiling up to a distasteful fleck of fuel. “This is toxic, Bucky. You won’t even tell me what’s wrong! What kind of trust is this bond built upon? This chain of – I don’t even know, lies?”
“You’re not leaving.”
She loved him, she truly did. She loved him so much that it hurt – burned. It hurt her to know that she was going to end up inevitably losing him as well. First Natasha, then Tony, then Steve, and now him.
She loved him to the ends of the world, but she also knew that people were not homes. They were not the pedestals of Olympus, and they were not an unfathomable relic. They were flesh and bone.
She glared at him, saltwater staining at the edges of her looking glass, “Then give me a reason to stay. Please.”
He mellowed out at the tragically crafted choice that grew beneath them, genuinely on the verge of a shattered heart, “I can’t.”
8 years ago.
“Listen, Buck,” Steve encouraged politely, steadily guiding Bucky through the front gates of the tower. “Just be yourself and smile every once in a while. You'll be fine.” Of course, Steve Rogers would assume that. He was perfectly immortalized and adored – he could do no wrong. Bucky though, he could do a lot of wrong. Plenty.
Steve grimaced at Bucky’s lack of response, clapping a confrontational hand over his shoulder, “Hey, c’mon. You trust me, right?”
There was no hesitation in his reply, “I do.”
“Good, then you’ve got nothing to worry about. Let’s go.” The accords ordeal had been recently absolved, much to Tony’s relished dismay. After the two soldiers had left him stranded in Siberia, half-beaten to the pulp and frozen, he had had no intention of ever seeing them again – ever.
Steve had received a conditional pardon, under the impressionable ask that Bucky be put through an extensive recovery program. They had both been stationed to move into the avenger’s tower – Tony’s home – and there was no way that the man who had rightfully proclaimed himself as earth’s best defender was anywhere near relieved about this lonesome solution.
Bucky guardedly followed Steve through the labyrinth of puzzled hallways as he led them towards the conjoint living quarters.
“That’s 5, Wilson, step back.” A loud guffaw of laughter and mocked up insults followed Tony’s vent. His words were decipherable – rich and entitled – so it was easy for Bucky to tie down who had said what.
“Alright, boys,” crooned a female voice, “my turn.” Her say was new, and Bucky near paled at the sheer amount of confidence that stewed deep within her composure – almost identical to Tony’s.
“What’s going on in there?” Bucky implored, head cocking to the left as he regarded his friend with a curious look.
Steve shrugged half-heartedly; his blonde hair mussed. “Who knows? I haven’t been out here since before the accords.” The two of them swiftly snuck themselves into the room and were greeted by a ridiculously domestic family-like portrait.
Tony Stark was standing immutably by the burnished coffee table that was summed up at center of the room, a pretty redhead – whom he had recently come to know as Natasha Romanoff – was perched on the edge of the leather bound couch by his shoulder and Sam ‘the falcon’ Wilson was defeatedly making his way over to join them as they watched the fourth member of their little game pull herself up onto the marbled counter. Her legs were neatly folded over each other – criss cross apple sauce – and her eyes were sparkling with mischief.
“Oh, come on! There’s no way that you can top that.” He whined, throwing the grinning girl a terribly forced sneer.
“Try me.” She mused, beckoning for Tony to bring it on.
Utterly confused, Steve and Bucky simply watched in anticipation as to what the hell these four so called ‘heroes’ were playing at.
Natasha’s smile widened as she watched Tony pluck a grape out of the bowl that she had been holding, and joking flick his wrist around, “You ready, snippy?”
The girl in question laughed, wiggling her eyebrows, “Always.”
Tony tossed the grape up into the air, watching expectantly as she dropped her mouth open and easily caught it on her tongue. “One.” Natasha counted.
Tony went for another, but Sam gleefully slapped his arm away from the bowl. He groggily proceeded to grab a piece of fruit himself and effortlessly let it zip through the air. She caught it again.
Grape after grape, she successfully enraptured every single one.
Sam gaped at her with wide brown eyes as Natasha pumped a fist through the air, “I knew she would win.” She glowered smugly.
“Whatever.” Sam grunted.
“It’s not my fault that a measly grape beat you in the field of aerodynamics.” She teased, gracefully edging her hips off the counter, and letting her bare feet hit the floor. Sam childishly stuck his tongue out at her before finally taking notice of the two newly arrived additions.
“Oh, hey Cap –”
At his all too irregularly blunt greeting, Tony’s head nearly spun off his shoulders like a riddled beyblade, only to be beaten by the chillingly disapproving scowl that had doused the mystery girl’s face.
“Hey,” Steve replied, barely above whisper. His nervous gaze was desperately attempting to become adjacent to Tony’s, wanting nothing more than to tell him how unutterably sorry he was.
“Well, if it isn’t thing one and thing two,” she muttered lowly, protectively inching herself to Tony’s side. Who the hell was she, and why the hell was she – of all people – so upset with them?
“Agent, Y/L/N.” Steve acknowledged tersely, failing miserably in maintaining the intense staring match that she had initiated.
“Good to know that you still remember my name.” She hummed, turning her fully undivided attention towards Bucky, who was still awkwardly glaring at the ground. “Sergeant Barnes.”
“Ma’am,” he looked up at her, calculatingly taking a note of the way that her lips twitched up in a mild form of amusement at his formalities. Her face was so pretty – so delicate – that she nearly had him smiling back.
“We’re sorry for barging in,” Steve piped up, gladly shifting the gears away from the apprehensively awaiting train-wreck, “we should get going.”
“Yeah. You should.” Tony agreed, joylessly stalking away from their comically short interaction, accompanied devotedly by agent Y/L/N. Steve looked dejected – absolutely crestfallen – at Tony’s leave, but warily allowed for Natasha to whisk him away.
“So, you three,” she smiled grimly, using her right hand to flag out the area that withheld each of their rooms, “Steve, your room is the first door to the left, and then both Wilson and Barnes are positioned right across the hall from you. You just saw the kitchen, and you each have your own bathroom,” She paused, “Any questions?”
Bucky felt the retched burn of his previous confusion tingle it’s way up his throat like a gagging sense of word-vomit, and before he could stop himself, he posed, “Who was that girl?” Sam instantly smirked at his outward eagerness, while Steve and Natasha simply looked apologetic.
“That was Y/N,” Steve started, “she was recruited by Stark about a year before we found you in Romania. His prized pupil.”
“Yeah, she’s crazy talented,” Natasha added, “She’s got absolutely perfect aim and an even more perfect brain.”
“That’s why – the grapes.” Bucky recalled, and understanding flowing through him, “she doesn’t like me.” He murmured suddenly; the pernicious reminder stinging at his eyes.
“No, Buck,” Steve corrected, “she doesn’t like us as a whole – any of us.” Well, that didn’t make any sense, did it?
Natasha looked almost pained as she comfortingly set a hand on his arm, “Long story short, her and Steve were close, but not closer than she was with Tony.”
“I misguidedly asked for her help when I was planning on refusing the accords, but you know – she sided with Tony, so it didn’t really matter. I don’t blame her,” he reiterated honestly, “He’s like her father. She picked him over me, just like I picked you over them.”
“Was she at the airport?” Bucky asked, his blood clotting.
Natasha winced, “Yeah, she was actually there as our sniper, she would have killed you both had Tony not called it off. You should be grateful for that by the way, She doesn’t miss.”
Steve’s eyes were sad as he nodded along to whatever Natasha had been explaining, “And then after all of that we -”
“- We left him there. We just left him there.”
Bucky’s lies had initially started off as harmless.
Little, ‘I’m fine’s’ here and there whenever he didn’t want her to worry, because he knew that it was in her nature to do so. Simple, ‘they’re really not that bad’ whenever she took to lightly scalding her all too widely adored chocolate chip cookies. Easy, ‘everything will turn out okay’s’ whenever she was sad and fragile beneath his embrace.
His lies had been harmless until they weren’t.
He had a list. A very prim and proper list, decked out nicely across the pages of Steve’s old notebook.
Oh, how he missed Steve. He missed him everyday. He also knew that Steve would ceaselessly tell him that he was being an absolute moron for planning on destroying the best thing that had ever happened to him.
As much as he knew that Steve would scold him, it didn’t matter; he had his list, and he knew it well. His file was nearly complete, the littered names crossed off and obliterated by a finely started graphite scratch. Thinly processed lead amongst a roughened sheet of paper.
He had been making amends – real, true, soul-crushing amends. He had been content with his progress – genuinely proud of his achievements – until he had reread that godforsaken list. He had loyally reread the precious piece of wooden foil only to be pummeled to the ground by the tenacious force of a single name.
A last name.
So, he lied.
He lied, and he deceived, and he hid. What else could he have done? How the hell was he supposed to tell her that he had been the one to kill her double? Her former second marksman – her partner in crime.
He tried to play it off as a semi-believable case of sleep deprivation, but she noticed – of course she had noticed. Y/N and her intricately woven brain.
Bucky was laying awake, his blue eyes glued lawfully to the bubbly popcorn ceiling hung above the mattress. His heart hurt at the anguished look that he had plastered across her cheeks. His breath faltered at the knowledge of the remorseful tears that she had shed the second he had left the room.
She had left.
She had left him because he had hurt her.
He threw himself off the bed in a current, pressingly scouring around his room for a jacket before exigently stuffing himself into the first pair sweatpants he could find. He had let her leave, he –
His thoughts were foggy, his memory falsified, but he could not care less. Bucky ran through the mirrored tower of lolling corridors, mumbling soft ‘sorry’s’ to the sublime handful of shield agents that were aimlessly roaming the halls. She could not have gotten far.
He reached the ground floor without an ounce of serenity, lamentably seeing the familiar sweep of light-washed jeans tumble her way into the flaunted seat of the brightly painted yellow taxi. He sprinted, pushed his legs against the cobbled walkway without a single song of repercussion.
He ran at an impeccable speed, but the annoyingly joyful splash of the lily-livered car had already fled through the bustling streets of New York.
He had not been fast enough.
His jaded gaze was focused on the drops of pooled up liquid that the rain had left behind, drowsily molding down the asphalt.
He could have simply told her. He could have sat her down and held her face, coiling her hair around his finger. He could have pecked her nose and begged for her forgiveness, for it had always been her who told him that his past was not irrevocably his.
He felt defeated – sullen and sick and tired. He was so, so tired.
Dolefully, Bucky mucked up a graze of fervid dignity and skeptically went to find himself a drink at the nearest possible bar – not that he could get drunk.
His eyelids heaved against the breeze, the morning chill disking through his eyelashes. He had barely made it past the entrance before a girly drawl was thrown his way.
“What can I getcha’ handsome?” He dizzily looked up, locking down onto a pair of turbid grey eyes. She was pretty, with straight auburn hair and a well-suited nose. Her smile was bright and shiny, a mouth full of perfect pearly whites minus the slight chip in her bottom left incisor. She was charming, but she was not Y/N.
“The strongest of whatever you’ve got. Just keep ‘m coming.”
“I can do that,” she jostled, her still-warm grin settled lowly into a lopsided position.
7 years ago.
“For the millionth time, Barnes. I don’t hate you.”
He smiled, “So then what? Mildly dislike?”
A shocked laugh blew past her lips, the sudden show of delight causing her to slap a hand over her mouth. “Mildly annoyed by. Take it or leave it.”
He watched her adoringly, “You drive a hard bargain miss, but I am afraid that I will have to accept your terribly gracious offer.”
“It’s your funeral, sarge.”
“Hm. Sure, whatever you say, doll,” he turned his gaze back towards the tv, shifting his head against her immorally high mountain of pillows and lazily continuing to scrutinize as the show rolled on, “Do you really enjoy watching this stuff?” he pondered, peeking at her through the lowlights of the room.
“Well, I don’t know. I just figured that if you do what we do- “
“Bucky,” his breath hitched at the sound of his name disintegrating on her tongue, “criminal minds is very far away from being considered what ‘we do’. Plus, have you seen Doctor Reid- “
“Not this again,” he groaned, “Come on, Y/N, he’s so young – “
“This is season 1! Of course, he’s young. And besides, everybody is young in comparison to you.” She fired back, faultlessly leaning her head against his broad, Henley-clad shoulder. He froze. The sudden jerk of his arm against her sweatshirt made her pull back, repentant.
“Oh my god, I’m so sorry,” her eyes widened in realization.
“Hey – no. That was my fault, I just wasn’t expecting it.”
“I should have asked” she countered, studying him.
“Well, you’re asking now – and I’m telling you that it’s okay.”
She relaxed a little, slowly going back to snug herself underneath his left arm, “how’s this?”
He thawed, “That’s perfect.” A moment of silence hung in between them before he spoke again, “Were you just trying to profile me? Like in the show?”
She hushed him, snorting a little under her breath, “Definitely not. You’re too much of an open book.”
“Oh, you are so in for it,” he spurred mockingly before dissolving her into a fit of pitchy squeals as she dutifully held the remote control to her chest and ran through the sleeping compound in an attempt to escape his rudely commenced tickle fight.
The taxi driver was without a doubt confused. Confused, concerned and maybe even a tad bit conflicted thanks to the drizzled line of tears that had drawn a salty texture down her face.
Y/N had given him address after address, but every single time that he had announced their arrival at her desired destination, she had promptly placed another neatly printed dollar bill against the worn-out leather of the divider.
“Is there someone you can call?” He had asked her kindly. He was young, perhaps mid-twenties, with a mop of jet-black hair that curled out deliciously by his ears and a pair of green gemstones for eyes. Pretty, she thought. He was awfully pretty – terminally pretty. He looked like a sunken Adonis, and had he not been right by her side, she would have supposed that he could have escaped from one of the Louvre’s renaissance paintings.
He was pretty, but there was not a single feature on his unmarred face that outshone Bucky.
“Yeah, I-” She swallowed. She could not call Sam even if she wanted to, “-No, I don’t.”
He peeked at her through the glare, a sorry look swimming across his fine, aristocrat nose.
“Do you want to talk?”
She craned her neck towards him – intrigued by his genuine attempt at sparking a conversation – and then she laughed. She laughed a pillowy kind of laugh, pained and light.
“I’m not so sure that that would be considered appropriate.”
It was his turn to chuckle, “Well, I’m off the clock,” Y/N gaped at him before checking the time, “I have been for about an hour.”
It was six a.m.
“Oh, God,” She ran a hand over her face in embarrassment, “I am so, so sorry,”
“Hey, c’mon.” he assured her, “Don’t worry about it. It looked like you could use a friend.”
She groaned, “Yeah, I don’t seem to have to many of those lying around anymore.”
He was smiling again, a fluid and purely palpable gesture, “Well?”
“Y/N,” she offered, reaching her hand out towards his for a handshake.
She squinted at him, watching as the now newly littered light caressed his face, “Like the planet?”
“Kind of. Technically, the planet was named after the roman god Mars,”
She puffed, “Oh, close enough,”
“Sure.” He agreed sarcastically, firmly returning her greeting, “Will you let me take you home now? I’m sure your boyfriend’s is worried.”
She almost bawled again, gorgeously perplexed by his unfairly exquisite way with words, “Geez, what gave the boyfriend part away?”
He smirked, “The tears? Or maybe the melted mascara on your forehead?”
She coughed, “There’s mascara on my forehead and you didn’t tell me?” Her voice was jokingly disturbed.
“I’m telling you now, so, it cancels out. PEMDAS, baby.”
She sniffled on a giggle, “I hate math.”
“You and me both,” He promised, helping her slide the mirror open, “So?”
She shied away at his repeated reminder, “I suppose I’ll let you, Mars.”
“I am never going to be living that down, am I?”
“You know, you should really be blaming my parents, not me.”
“I actually quite like it. It suits you.”
“Are you calling me godly?” He teased, drooping his head to his shoulder, “Incessantly charming, sexy and irresistible?”
“Wow, you’re so modest.
“Nah, I just know I'm right.” She chaffed a little, treating herself to a private little smile that she managed to hide against the back of her palm. She knew why it had been so easy for her to let him dry her tears. He reminded her of Tony.
6 years ago.
“Okay so let me get this straight,”
“You don’t like the peanut sauce?”
“You, Bucky Barnes, do not like the peanut sauce?”
“Y/N, I literally just said- “
“How is that even possible?”
“It’s really not that big of a deal- “
“Are you sure you’re real? Maybe you’re an alien?”
He blanked, “What?”
“Bucky, everybody likes peanut sauce. It’s the best part!”
“I think that it tastes better without it!”
“This is insane,” Her expressions were frantic, her hands gripping at his shoulders in an attempt of snapping him out of it. “Eating a salad roll without peanut sauce is like… a crime.”
He choked on the remainder of his food, her bluntly honest remark making him giddy, “Doll, coming from someone who has indeed committed actual crimes,” she flinched, “I can assure you that this is in fact, legal.”
“I hate you,” She grumbled and unconvincingly rolled off the picnic blanket. She clumsily assembled the takeout boxes that had scattered themselves around the checkered fabric and went to toss them away.
“Mildly annoyed by,” he reminded her cheekily, watching her as she rolled her eyes. He was laying down, his front leisurely basked against the warm summer sun, with one arm propped up behind his neck and the other fumbling around in the plush expanses of the grass to his right.
“That comment is retractable.”
“Oh, is it?” He whispered, sitting up to grab at her waist and sweep her off her feet. She yelped as she came tumbling down, their limbs tangling around each other. His breath was festering against her neck, his nose skimming at the skin that wrapped it’s way around her jaw. He had never been this close to her before. He had never been this confident.
“And what can one do to have it remain as it is?” His face was stoned, his pupils drawn out big amidst the flailing rims of blue.
“Well, what do you want to do?” The question was vague, she knew that, but it was necessary. Was she reading this all wrong?
“I don’t know.”
“You don’t know?”
He sighed a little breath against her skin, finally pressing a taunting peck to the tip of her shoulder, “I think I want to kiss you, but- “
“But what?” She mumbled, locking her legs around the back of his thighs in order to miserably restrain her trembles.
“I don’t want you to regret it,” Bucky’s eyes shut as he nuzzled his nose further against her pulse point, “I don’t want you to ever have to see me the way that Steve does, or Tony, or Nat,”
“They don’t see you like I do.” He stiffened at her confession, an injured look assembling itself over the layers of his flesh. “What is it?”
“It’s like I want to be alone, and yet I still want to be touched.”
“To be touched by- “
“By you.” She gasped softly against his lips, the mere tilt of his chin connecting their mouths. A domino effect. Their kiss was so full of unsaid ‘thank you’s’ and ginger pleads, that his mind went limp. He let her lead the way, his body pliable beneath her. They kissed and nipped at each other’s faces until the lack air between their embrace took it’s toll. Bucky’s face was flushed, his eyes still closed.
“You’re a dumbass,” She mumbled, her own skin split in half by the grin she was sporting.
“It took you two whole years to do that.” His free hand had secretly snuck its way back into the grass, and was childishly tugging at the stem of a larger daisy.
“Better late than never,”
She snickered at the concentrated look that had graced his face as he tried to ease the plant behind her ear, his nose scrunched up and his lips sucked in, “I can see that you’re struggling a little,”
“Just shut up and give me a second, doll.” Once he had successfully secured the dainty petals against her hair, he leaned back in awe to admire the girl that was strewn out atop his chest.
“Well, it’s only fair that since I have one, you should have one too.” Confused, Bucky patiently waited for her as she found herself her own little flower to insert into his hair, “Now we’re even.”
“Now we’re even.”
“What about Sushi?”
“Have you ever tried Sushi?”
“Doll, I lived in both Russia and Romania- “
“That one I haven’t,” He yielded.
“It’s Greek. You’ll love it.”
“So, the avengers, huh,”
Bucky awkwardly swished his glass around, watching dumbly as the drink meddled itself into a riptide. “Well, it’s not really the avengers anymore.”
Rachel – the bartender – had sat herself down by his side, nursing her own shot of liquor. “Still, it’s rather impressive.” They had been exchanging a few measly words here and there, but her constant increase in mindless touches had begun to set him on edge. “You know, I’ve never seen you around here before.”
“That’s because I’ve never had a reason to come.” He blanched truthfully.
“Yeah, I could tell,” she commented sourly, “I could spot a heartbroken man from a mile away if I wanted to, same thing applies to those who just got dumped.”
“I did not get dumped.” He denied vehemently.
“No need to lie, honey. It’s her loss anyways.” She was way too close.
“Rachel, I’m serious- “
“Do you have a girlfriend then? Oh, maybe a boyfriend?”
“C’mon, sweetheart. We all know that honesty is the best policy,” and just as Bucky was about to tell her to fuck off, she had swiftly leaned up and kissed him.
Her lips were rigid and chapped, almost uncomfortable in their friction. He was frozen, shocked by the spontaneity of the assault.
Thoughtlessly, he shoved the girl away from him, furiously wiping the palm of his hand against his mouth. His eyes were huge, a lingered feel of cold disgust seeping through his tongue at the aftertaste of her matted lipgloss.
“Don’t you ever,” He growled, “touch me again – or any, taken man for that matter.”
She ogled at him from her seat, watching as he yanked his jacket on and hurriedly deserted the pub. He had to find Y/N. He had to find her and hold her and promise her, that his heart was hers and only hers. His shallow breaths were iced around him, the gelatinous rays of sun carding through his hair. He had kissed another woman – not consensually, but to him that did not matter. It was Y/N lips he craved. He was going to lose her, and in that agonizingly treacherous process, he would equally lose himself.
Bucky was about to purposefully cross street and bound across the pavement until his opaque eyes met hers across the intersection. Y/N’s heart torn gaze left him breathless, his feet lurching him towards her. He was ecstatic to see her standing there, wrapped up amidst one of his hoodies. His girl. He was so happy to see her standing there, that he almost missed the person that was yapping by her side.
He stilled unwillingly, staring fiercely at the dark-haired man that was coolly leaning against the taxi. Y/N tore her eyes away from Bucky’s, twisting around to whisper something against the other’s guy’s ear.
Bucky hadn’t even realized that he had begun to move until he came face to face with the tall, ruggedly charismatic lead singer of some surely superficial boyband. He was certainly not apart of chase atlantic or whatever the hell it was that Y/N listened to, but he definitely fit the type.
The tightness that was spreading through Bucky’s throat was bitter, it was jealous.
“Who the fuck, are you?” He hissed out, possessively going to grab at her waist.
“Bucky, calm down. This is Mars, and he was just leaving.”
The guy – Mars – gave her a knowing nod, and replied, “Yeah, I’ll text you.”
“Like hell you will.” Bucky seethed and went to skillfully lunge across the sidewalk, but she gripped his arm.
“Thanks again. Bye.” She said softly, parting ways with the pompous looking asshole who seemed to have the word ‘douchebag’ written all over him. Y/N dragged Bucky down the side of the cement road, gifting him with nothing but a whole lot of upheaving silence. He was sinking.
The second that she had managed to lug the both of them into the hollow cage of the tower’s elevator, he was on her.
“Who was that?” He asked lamely, trying his best to remain impassive.
“Oh, so now you wanna talk? This is ridiculous.”
“Just answer the question, damnit!” So much for that externally unbothered demeanor. His outburst did not go unnoticed, and he inwardly cringed at the look of unrequited rage that spun itself off her eyes.
“Fine! He was the taxi driver who willingly and unselfishly drove me around for the last two hours! He watched me cry and he offered me advice – I mean, he even gave me a packet of fucking baby wipes to clean my face!”
Bucky’s face dropped, what had he done? “I’m sorry-”
“You don’t get to tell me that you’re sorry. It just won’t cut it.”
He looked down at his feet, not knowing what to do, “Then what can I say?”
“Tell me the truth- ”
“I love you.”
“Damn your love, damn your lies, damn all of this! Tell me, the truth.”
“I kissed another girl.” He rushed out, the words spicy and hot against his teeth. Her face went slack, her jaw dropping open in an uttered silence. It was so quiet that they could both hear the mechanical whir of the elevator hinges.
“What?” Her voice was so small – so frail – that he just wanted to die. He wanted to dig a hole, crawl inside of it and die.
“I… When you ran out, I went to go after you,” There were tears in her eyes, “but you had already called a cab and... I was so close, baby.” The look of pure horror that roused behind her cheeks at the mention of her favored nickname shot a hole straight through his heart. “I went to Rori’s because I was sad, and upset and hurt, and then the waitress she…” A whimper escaped her lips, “She kissed me.”
“Oh god.” A disbelieving sob left her lungs, “Oh, Buck…” He felt his own tears well as he watched her slide her back down the wall. “Did you kiss her back?”
He looked up, “What?”
“Did you kiss her back?”
“No! God, no, Y/N. I didn’t. If anything I probably hurt her when I pried her off.” There was no laugh, no general twitch at his terribly placated joke. “Baby, I’m so sorry-”
“That still doesn’t answer my question about all those other nights.” She interrupted, her bottom lip wobbling between her teeth as she tried to ignore his overly recited apology. She wanted to be the bigger person, “I can forgive you for something that you did not agree to, but I cannot keep pretending to okay with the constant secrecy. If you don’t love me now, it’s over. We’re over,” his breath hitched, “You will never love me again. So, please.”
“You’re giving me an ultimatum?” He intoned, his heart skipping over a full fledged beat when she remained mute. It was now or never. “Okay then.”
“Okay?” She repeated cautiously, timorously reaching for his hand.
“Okay.” He repeated, reverently lacing their fingers. “I killed-” he tightened his grip on her palm as she sent him a disapproving glare over her elbow, instantaneously making him rebute his statement, “the winter soldier, killed…” Y/N’s eyes were calm and serene, the perfect example of a relinquished safe haven that he was about to lose – demolish. “Daniel.”
She frowned, the dimpled crease between her eyebrows making her look oddly enchanting. “Dan? As in...”
“Yes.” He hushed, a tear glissading past the barriers of his waterline and burning its way down the length of his face before it was surprisingly met by her index finger.
“You stupid, stupid boy.” She whispered grimly, leaning her neck against the cool plates of the elevator, and allowing for the buttons to etch themselves into her back. He wordlessly pressed his nose to the tip of her collarbone, inhaling. “Bucky… James,” she pushed him away from her chest, “Daniel is a very old wound that can not be easily unstitched. I loved him very much, and he was one of my best friends, but he died saving hundreds of people.” Bucky whined lowly at the mention of the sniper’s death, “You didn’t kill him, Buck. That wasn’t you, and you know that I believe that. Why would you hide that from me? Why would you- “
“I didn’t want you to see me as a murderer.”
She snipped, “You deceived me; you didn’t trust me enough to tell me. You let us suffer over something that could have easily been avoided. You let me think that there was something wrong with me-”
“Baby, no,” his voice wavered, “I’m sorry- “
“Stop apologizing!” His jaw snapped shut, perspicuously stunned by her tone. “Me and you,” she gestured between them, “we’re a team. You could have told me, Bucky. You lied to me.”
“You hurt me.” Her accusation was candid, like a sweetened caramel apple dipped inside of a raw precision.
“I know.” She sighed as she listened to him breathe his approval, her eyes tabulating through some sort of internal conflict.
“I know you do. That’s what makes this so much harder.”
He held his breath as he lent her his next question, “How do I fix this? Please, tell me how and ill do it. Anything.”
“You don’t fix this Buck; you learn from it. You grow.” This is it, he thought. She’s going to end it.
“I don’t know how.” He breathed huskily, unsure of whether or not he felt like crying.
“I’ll help you,” She hummed softly, her words causing for his eyes to shoot open, half-lidded and confused.
“You’ll stay with me?”
She smiled, “So long as you can promise me that you’ll be honest with me from now on. You’ve chained my heart, Barnes. It’s all yours.” He exhaled, a loud and disbelieving gulp of air before he pinned her mouth shut with a kiss, basking his soul against the familiar closeness.
“I swear to you, no more secrets and no more hiding.”
Her head swayed around his clavicle, “And no more kissing other girls.”
He groaned, “You’re the only one I want, I promise.”
They stayed like that for who knows how long, a pair on unsuspecting lovers curled up against the refreshing sling of the elevator slab.
“Salad rolls?” He mumbled tiredly, punctuating his words into her wacked out hair.
“Salad rolls.” She agreed happily, “Can I have your peanut sauce though?”
He scoffed under his breath, “First you want me to like the peanut sauce and now you wanna steal it, huh?” She narrowed her eyes at him, unamused by his query. “I’ll get you all the peanut sauce you want, doll.”
@dardardarina @aderiex @petersslvt
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Pairing- Bucky Barnes x F! reader (Y/N)
Word Count- 1783
Warnings- canon typical violence, angst, language
Summary- Y/N is a top notch agent that left SHIELD years ago on not so great of terms. Now she is forced to go back and face the past, including a blue-eyed someone she used to call her best friend.
A/N- Here’s an angsty little something I cooked up to vent. Based loosely on some real life issue and events. I truly wrote this for myself to help deal with things. It’s a five part mini series.
Let me know if you’d like to be added to the tags
Sitting in the waiting room of the medical bay, you leaned forward and placed your face in your hands. Consumed with fear and guilt, you were still wearing your tactical suit, not having bothered to change since coming home.
You and Bucky had been on a mission not far from headquarters. It was supposed to be a simple snatch and grab of some data about potential Hydra bases that remained in the US.
Only, it wasn’t simple and things went bad. Fast.
Everything had been running smoothly. You had uploaded the data and started making your exit. In the next instant you were both surrounded by 20 adversaries on the loading bay of an abandoned warehouse. Heavily outnumbered, the two of you battled your way to an escape.
As you both began running away from the building and towards your car, you failed to see a man on the roof that had taken aim directly at the back of your head with a rifle. At the last second as he pulled the trigger, Bucky had jumped in front of you taking the bullet in his chest. Hearing the gunshot and then turning to watch Bucky go down, you quickly took aim and shot the man that had just injured your partner. Holster if your gun, you then bent down to assist Bucky back to standing. With his arm around your shoulders, you mostly dragged him the remaining distance to the car then sped back to SHIELD.
Although he was a super soldier, you were still scared for Bucky. You’d seen him get hurt before and knew he wasn’t invincible. As the fear seeped into you as you raced down the highway, you realized just how intricately woven he had become In your life.
By the time you arrived at headquarters, Bucky had lost a significant amount of blood and was beginning to teeter on the edge of consciousness. He was immediately rushed to surgery while you were left in the waiting room.
Four hours later, a doctor finally came through the double doors.
“Ms. Y/L/N?,” she asked as she approached you.
“Yes?” you responded, your voice hoarse from disuse.
“We’re done with Mr. Barnes. He’s going to be fine. We’ve already moved him into a room and he’s been asking for you. We don’t normally let people in this quickly, but he was pretty adamant about seeing you,” she explained.
“So can I? See him, that is?”
“Yes, just follow me,” she said as she gestured down towards the double doors and down the hall.
Standing up, you followed her down the white hallway and attempted to steady your breathing. Although you were accustomed to injuries and blood, the thought of seeing Bucky laid out because of a mistake you made had you feeling a mixture of anxiety and guilt.
After two left turns, the doctor opened a door on the right and let you inside a room where Bucky was on a bed in the center. His tactical suit had been removed and he sat shirtless with white bandages covering the right side of his chest. Several wires were hooked up to his arm and there was a monitor beeping softly in the background.
“Thanks doc,” he said, looking past you and essentially dismissing the doctor from the room. She took the cue and exited, quietly closing the door behind her, leaving the two of you alone in the room.
“Before you say anything, this is not your fault,” he asserted in a very stern voice. “So I don’t want you feeling guilty or anything.”
“But I should have checked up high. . . that’s just basic training,” you argued back, feeling the sting of tears in your eyes, ”and I didn’t and you got shot and could have died and--”
“Y/N, stop,” he interrupted as he sat up a bit straighter. “I’m fine. I’ve had a lot worse. I’ll just be sore for a little while.”
“I’m so sorry, Bucky.”
“Don't be. I willingly jumped to take that bullet and I’d do it again,” he smiled at you with a wink. “Besides, you can make it up to me.”
“You’re going to make me take care of you while you’re laid up aren’t you?”
“Somebody’s got to do it. Lucky for you I heal fast so it should only be a week or so.”
Without another word, you walked forward and leaned down to give Bucky a hug. He returned the favor as best as he could without pulling out a wire.
“I’m really glad you’re ok. I was pretty scared for a minute there,” you admitted, still holding him lightly for fear of causing him pain.
“Me too,” he breathed back into your hair.
After your encounter with Bucky the night before, you found sleep difficult as old emotions took over, keeping you awake. In lieu of rest, you opted to look over the file he had sent you on the Flag Smashers. Reading through, you found yourself caught up in the history of the organization, as well as their current objective. You also found yourself impressed with Bucky’s plan to infiltrate them as it was well thought out and would require you to go deep undercover.
As intriguing as the report was, you must have passed out at some point because you woke up with your face stuck to the keyboard. Opening your eyes further, you saw the first rays of sunlight seeping into your office.
After removing your face from the keys, you got up and made yourself a quick cup of coffee then went back to your desk. Clutching your oversized mug, you tried to read more but your eyes refused to stop crossing as you tried to look over the file again.
Setting the file down, you started to weigh the pros and cons of going on this mission.The itch to get back out into the field after almost six months away from it was extraordinarily enticing. However, in this instance it would mean working directly with Bucky. It would also mean being away from your mom as this case would take some time to execute and would require you to be away from the Avengers tower. She was, however, under excellent care now and was even taking steps towards walking again.
After spending some time debating with yourself about the mission, you walked out of your office and decided to try to clear your head. You made a quick stop at your room to change then went outside for a run. You were somewhere on mile four of your jaunt on the eastern edge of the SHIELD campus when you saw a dark, yet familiar figure. There was no denying the powerful presence of Nick Fury.
Slowing as you approached him, you came to a full stop in your run once you were ten feet away to greet him.
“I doubt you’re here to join me for a run,” you breathed out as you placed your hands on your hips to help catch your breath.
“I don’t run,” was his only reply.
“Then I assume you’re here to persuade me on the Flag Smashers mission.”
“Something like that. Mostly, I came out here to tell you to let the past go,” he said.
“What is that supposed to mean?” you asked as you pulled your head back slightly offended at the accusation.
“It means whatever happened between you and Barnes needs to be put to rest. I knew you were still sore on the subject when we brought you back, but for fucks sake, it’s over. Let it go,” he told you.
“I’m sorry, Nick. I know you’re used to being in charge but you do not get to tell me how I’m supposed to feel or what emotions I’m allowed to have,” you spat back at him. “You knew I was still pissed about this, yet you begged me to come back. And now you’re telling me to snap out of it? With all due respect, you can go fuck yourself.”
“Watch it Y/L/N,” he warned.
The two of you sat staring at each for a few moments more before you broke the silence. “So are you going to persuade me or not.”
“No. I just came to tell you to take it easy on Barnes.”
“Why?” you inquired.
“Because he didn’t do anything wrong.”
“Right, the perfect soldier. I didn’t realize you had such a soft spot on him. You know, especially since he almost killed you.”
“Would you cut the crap Y/N. I’m telling you to take it easy on Barnes because it wasn’t his decision all those years ago.
It was mine.”
In that moment your heart stopped. If the decision for not being promoted wasn’t Bucky’s then he had been lying all these years. He watched you run and allowed the dissolution of your friendship and your entire life at SHIELD.
“What. . .” you squeaked out.
“It was my decision to not promote you. Not Bucky. So you can stop hating him.”
“B-but why?” you whispered.
“I had my reasons. Mostly that the two of you worked well together but you also clouded each other’s judgements. I thought by keeping you down, it might ease some of the reliance you two had on each other. I never expected you to run like you did.”
“C-cloud each other’s judgment? What does that even mean?” you asked as you mind raced to try to process this new information.
“It’s beside the point now. We all made mistakes. But you’re here again and you have a good job. Better than the one you wanted back then,” he reminded you. “It’s time to move forward. So hate me if you want. But go on that mission. And stop blaming Barnes.”
With that he turned and walked away at a steady gate until he reached a perimeter door then stepped back inside the building.
You remained planted in your spot. Everything had changed in a second. Your world turned upside down again. Even if Fury had made the decision, Bucky had still lied. Heartbroken, you had run away from your friends, family, and everything you knew. Bucky may not have made the decision but he certainly had a hand in the events that transpired afterwards by lying to you.
It was several minutes before you realized you were still standing in the same spot crying. Your mind racing at all the possible reasons Fury thought you two clouded each other’s judgment. Why Bucky would lie for him? How life could have been so different if honesty had prevailed? Finally composing yourself, you resolved to confront Bucky to get answers.
Tags- @stevetonycupcakes @angstysebfan @sltwins @capmanranger @maryosprinkle
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Chapter 48 // SHADOW BOXING
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“Romanoff, Barton, take the right...we’ll come up behind him—” Steve started as he rounded the corner in front of you, the metal of his shield glancing off what little light entered the stairwell and illuminated your lurking form.
“Or,” you hummed, your cloaked voice harmonizing with itself in the stairwell. Steve jumped, raising his shield in front of him and the team, “You could meet me mask-to-face.”
Steve froze, staring at you like a deer in the headlights, “Jesus Christ.”
“No, just me,” you shrugged, not bothering to get up as the rest of his team came into view, “Just...Ghost.”
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» Chapter 48 // Shadow Boxing «
| Battle Scarred : Aftermath | »Darke15
wanna live comment as you read? click here
#wraith_revealed ... ?
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This is a timeline of my own making. Bucky’s just been fucking around America after the events of CA:WS and Steve has been working on getting him a pardon with the help of his bestie Tony
Warnings: swearing (?), character death, crying, dementia
Bucky may be an old man, but he never forgets his promises.
“Evening ladies, enjoy your night.” You waved at the parting day staff tiredly, dropping your bag in the break room and returning to find the nurse with your allocations. You bumped elbows with Evan, another care assistant that was working with you that night.
You went through the usual routine of filling your pockets with gloves and all the essentials before doing your checks, peeking in on the day room to spot the residents still awake and then checked each room, making sure the ones in bed were comfortable.
“Evening Peggy.” You called, stepping into the old woman’s room. She smiled brightly, looking up from the magazine she was reading. She pushed her gray hair back from her face and you smiled, gathering her evening requirements and helping her through a change.
“You do much today?” Peggy asked as you fixed her blankets around her. She wasn’t sure which one you were but she knew the uniform symbolized that you would help her.
“Slept after last night’s shift. Watched some crap tv and slept on the couch and then came back to work.” You told her with a laugh.
“Ah, you’re my girl. I didn’t know you were working today.” You smiled gently, brushing through her hair.
Peggy fondly referred to you as her girl when she was aware. She had coined the name when you would come in to her first, helping her through as much of her confusion as possible. So when she heard you talk for a while the fog lifted and she remembered as much of you as possible.
“That’s me, Peg. You need anything before I get going?” You asked gently and she pointed at the jug of water weakly. You filled her a glass, thickening the fluid for her and offering her a spoonful. Her swallow hadn’t been the best lately so all of her fluid had to be thickened up now.
“Thank you.” She whispered when you wiped her mouth. You offered her a gentle smile, your hand smoothing her hair once more and she closed her eyes, drifting off to sleep.
When you got to the next room you found your next resident rolled up in his blankets, fast asleep. You had to cajole him awake and into pyjamas before letting him back to sleep.
On your rounds you came back to Peggy’s room, checking her over and pausing in the doorway when you saw a shadow against the window.
“Joe, that you?” You turned the dim light on but the shadow was gone. You took a second to check behind the curtains for one of your wanderers but when he didn’t show up you left the room, leaving Peggy to sleep in peace.
Joe was in his bed when you checked his room so you pushed it from your mind and went about the rest of your shift.
The following night on one of your later checks you found someone by Peggy’s bedside, her hand in his. She was shushing him quietly, attempting to comfort him.
Peggy often got guests who didn’t have to sign in or provide identification. It was a side-effect of who she had been. You watched the pair of them for a minute and when it appeared he didn’t mean any harm you stepped into the room.
“You need anything, Peg?” You asked gently and she looked up from the hand she was clutching and shook her head, wiping away a tear.
“I’m good. You need anything James?” She asked carefully. The man shook his head without turning around and so you left them both in peace.
On your next check he was gone and Peggy was fast asleep. You checked her over, rousing her quietly to make sure she hadn’t been harmed in any way. “Don’t tell anyone. He wasn’t supposed to be here.”
“Will he hurt you?” You asked quietly. She shook her head and so you gave her a soft smile. Over the years there had been countless visitors who didn’t leave a name or even come in the front door.
You didn’t mind keeping this secret for her. You were willing to offer any of your residents the same. They told you things, the knew they could trust you. Many residents over the years had admitted to something or other. Be it affairs, accidents or illegal doings.
More than one young woman had knocked a ladder out from under their step dad and it wasn’t your place to tell them it was wrong.
Seeing as you worked with cognitively impaired residents it also wasn’t a reliable truth. You just had to let it go sometimes and assure them their secret was safe.
The visitor became a regular and you often brought him coffee on your round, knowing he’d be there. Sometimes he talked to Peggy and she’d comfort him. Other times he’d just hold her hand while she slept.
“When I first saw him I thought I had died.” She told you one night while you helped her into bed. “Because he‘s supposed to be.”
You continued to comb through her hair, taking in her words but not really registering them. Sometimes there was little sense in the things dementia patients would say. There was often times where all you could do was nod your head and tell them you agreed with what they were saying.
“What do you mean, Peg?” You ask, fixing her hair out from under the collar of her nightgown and continuing to comb it just how she liked it.
“James fell from the train. I remember when Steve came back, how he’d looked. James was his last family.” She told you and your brain caught up with the conversation and you paused in brushing her hair. “I think that’s when Steve came to terms with the fact that he might not make it out alive.”
“You mean Barnes, right?” You asked and she nodded solemnly. She took your hand in hers and was about to say something when a cough from the window drew your attention.
“You ladies talkin’ ‘bout me?” You hadn’t heard him speak before but he stood by the window, arms folded. He had similarities to the man from the stories but you guessed he was probably a grandchild or something.
“Peggy has the best bed time stories. Sometimes they’re ghost stories.” You explained and Peggy laughed fondly, smacking your arm. She knew you would listen no matter what she had to say.
“Sometimes ghosts are real.” Bucky told you gruffly and you shrugged, the dots connecting in your head. This was him, this was Bucky Barnes.
“I ain’t ever seen one.” He understood your promise, how this would remain a secret between you three. You had no business sharing his story.
“Better keep your eyes open then.” You smiled at him and left the two to have their nightly chats. You stopped by later in the night with a coffee for him and he smiled at you, returning to holding Peggy’s hand.
He began to arrive in Peggy’s room just before you left it most nights and you joked that he’d give the other staff heart attacks when you weren’t there.
“James only comes by when your here. No one else knows.” Peggy told you, her eyes twinkling when James blushed red.
“Peg says your her best girl. Hard to earn that kind of trust from the founder of SHIELD. Decided you’d be worth the risk.” He shrugged and you smiled, closing the door softly behind you.
He arrived late one night, not arriving until you’d been doing one of your rounds. You found him by Peggy’s bedside and handed him his coffee before leaving, looking frazzled.
It had been a long night with a new admission who arrived without medication. It made the woman violent and hard to predict so it had been a team effort to get her into bed.
You had to rotate staff, playing up to her hallucinations. She thought Evan had been breaking in so you had taken over, agreeing that he was awful and that you’d called the cops and then she’d decided you were her husbands mistress so the nurse had swept in, banning you for your misdeeds.
It was a constant rotating game and so you were exhausted and covered in scratch marks. You’d never change your job for the world but nights like these more than tempted you.
You usually took the visitor room for your breaks, curling up on the comfortable couch in an attempt to get a moment of shut eye. Until you were joined.
“You look stressed.” He takes a seat and you narrow your eyes at him. “I don’t mean that as an insult. You look nice but stressed.”
“New admission. It’s taking a lot to calm her down.” You told him, your knees pulled up to your chest.
“I’d imagine that’s very tough.” He told you and you laughed, nodding.
“Nothing on Nazi Germany though.” You told him and he rolled his eyes, shrugging.
“Yeah well I thought I’d really look my age if I started with the ‘when I was your age’ bull.” He told you and you shrugged.
“I love hearing stories. It’s the best part of my job. What’s your favorite memory?” You asked him quietly and he took a second to consider your question.
“Brought Steve on The Cyclone out on Coney Island and he puked so much.” James laughed and you grinned.
“Back when he was just a little slip of a thing? That’s just mean.” You told him and he shrugged.
“He always wanted to prove he was the big guy. Had to take him down a notch or two.” He shrugged again and you smiled against your knees.
“When did you meet Peggy?” You ask and he smiles before thinking hard.
“I, I don’t remember it all. I just remember this red dress. God she was a sight for sore eyes that day.” He told you and you smiled. You’d seen pictures of the red dress.
“Paired with the lipstick, she was a showstopper.” You agreed.
“She had to be the most gorgeous woman I’d ever seen back then.” He told you honestly. “I woulda’ been jealous had she been with anyone that wasn’t Stevie. He deserved the attention.”
“Real nice of you.” You teased, pulling your knees up to your chest. “What do you do all day?”
“I try to learn again.” He told you honestly. “Try remember who Bucky Barnes was. Someday I feel like I’ve forgotten more than Peggy.”
“Well, you are old. Holes in your memory aren’t uncommon.” You told him, suppressing your grin. “It’s called being senile.”
“If you count the time I was awake for then I’d be only a few years older than what I was when I fell from the train.” He told you and your brows furrowed.
“Awake?” You asked. “We’re you in a coma or somethin’?”
“Or something.” He told you with a shrug.
Bucky joins you on your break every night your working for the following months. On the nights you fall asleep he wakes you when you’re due to go back.
He visits Peggy every night, talking with her as long as she can stay awake for him. She fills the holes in his memory. Helps him view things how she had.
Several weeks later you got word during handover that Peggy had a bad day. Steve had come to visit and thrown her completely off her rhythm. It was normal and it happened but it hurt to see her so distressed.
You joined her at bed time and she was crying, distraught over Steve’s death all over again.
“Hey Peg.” You smiled, sitting on the side of her bed, smoothing her hair. She was sniffling, wiping her face.
“Sorry you had to see me like this. I lost someone important today.” She told you solemnly and you nodded.
“Steve was quite a guy, huh?” You asked and she shook her head.
“No, Steve got back okay. We lost Sergeant Barnes and Steve is so lost without him.” She told you, a fresh wave of tears taking over. Steve must have told her Bucky was dead, not knowing that she knew better.
“Awh Peg, don’t be silly. ‘m right here.” Peggy’s face lit up, her eyes locking on Bucky as he came through the window. You smiled happily, glad he made his entrance on perfect time.
“James!” She cried in relief and Bucky joined you by her bedside, wrapping her in a hug. “Your hair!”
“Not up to regulation. I know but the dames love the length.” Peggy laughed, delighted at his scandalous words. “Gives ‘em something to hold onto.”
“Now Sergeant Barnes. Myself and Peggy are ladies.” You reminded him with a wink and he laughed before nodding.
“I’m sorry. Pretty ladies make me nervous.” He told you and you rolled your eyes. “Makes me run my mouth a little.”
“Peggy is so very gorgeous.” You agreed and she smiled.
“I don’t think he’s talking about me, dear.” She told you gently, patting your hand.
That night when he joined you for a break he had his ever present gloves off. The metallic one shone in the light.
He told you everything that night. How he had been on the run, how he couldn’t go home because he doesn’t know where that is.
The next morning when your shift ends you find him waiting outside, leaning against a motorbike.
“Where’d you get that?” You ask, joining him on the back without question.
“Borrowed it.” He told you, his shoulders shrugging. You wrapped your arms around his middle and he started up the bike.
“You’ll never get your pardon with moves like this.” You called in his ear. You could feel his laugh through his chest and you smiled against the shoulder of his leather jacket.
When he pulled up outside your apartment block after following your directions you climbed off the bike, letting him help you.
“You wanna come up?” You asked and he nodded, almost shy. “I’m not sure how good of company I’ll be. I’ll crash soon because I’ve another shift tonight.”
You tell him more about yourself as you make breakfast. You tell him about your family, about growing up. You tell him how you ended up being a cared, how you love your residents just like family.
“We aren’t supposed to, you know? Supposed to maintain a professional relationship.” You tell him, stirring the eggs on the pan. “I can’t ever help myself. They’re all so lost and they just want to go home. I try make it home.”
“She loves you, ya know?” He asked and you looked up. “Peggy. She talks about you like you hung the mood and the stars.”
“She’s a hero. She doesn’t remember it sometimes but I always do. She did more for us than we could ever do for her.” You shrug. “She’s like a grandma to me.”
Bucky winced and you laughed, knowing it was because he was the same age as her. “That’s right, grandpa.”
“You know back in the forties I had a couple of Dames call me daddy. But this has gotta be the first time someone called me grandpa.” He teased and your cheeks flushed at his crass words.
“Now James Buchanan, I’m a lady and you’ll treat me as such.” You warned, dishing up his eggs.
“Oh I treated plenty of ladies back in my day. I’d have treated you just like them.” He promised, his flesh hand over his heart.
“How’d you treat ‘em?” You asked, curious for the glimpse at who he was.
“Bring them flowers. Whatever I could pick on the way over. Then I’d dance with them all night long. Until the band stopped playing. Then I’d walk them home, pull them into an alley and get under their skirts.” He teased and you laughed.
“I thought sex before marriage was a sin?” You asked and he nodded.
“Oh yes. I never want all the way with them. Well except that one nurse out in Italy but that don’t count. We both thought we were gonna die out there.” He told you, lost in the memory.
“You said you got under their skirt.” You reminded him and he grinned wickedly.
“Yeah, to get my mouth on them. Always showed the ladies a good time.” He promised and you swallowed roughly. “None of ‘em ever returned the favor though.”
“So you went down on all those ladies and none of them ever gave you anything back?” You asked and he nodded.
“Not so much as a helping hand. Didn’t want to soul their dresses.” He told you.
“That’s not very lady like.” You told him. “Tit for tat, that’s what I always say.”
“Is that so, Doll?” He asked, pushing his stool back. “You willing to put your money where your mouth is?”
“Not my money. But there are certainly other things I’d like where my mouth is.”
When you woke you were alone. You expected to be, Bucky had told you as much. You were deliciously sore and you stretched languidly before sliding out of the bed.
You showered before work, getting dressed and heading outside to your Uber. You were looking forward to seeing your super soldier again.
He joined you that night on his break, taking the seat next to you and pulling you into his lap. He held you in silence for several moments before whispering against your hair.
“I’m gonna go back to New York. Hand myself in to Steve and Tony.” He tells you quietly and you nod slowly. “Only way I can ever have a normal life.”
“So I won’t see you?” You ask quietly and he holds you tighter.
“I’m hoping I’ll be gone for a year at most.” You we’re about to reply when your pager goes off, alerting you both to Peggy’s room.
By the time you get to Peggy she’s at the end. She’s smiling, a picture of her family clutched in her hand. She traces her finger over her fallen husband and she’d a tear.
“Time you got something to hold onto Bucky.” Peggy died with both of you by her side, clutching your hands.
“He’s going to need you now more than ever.” You tell Bucky. “But don’t forget to come back.”
A year passed and then six more months. You get random phone calls at all hours from Bucky where he tells you about trial after trial he has to stand. He tells you about the emotional rollercoaster of Tony finding out about his parents.
Tony had stopped visiting Bucky then but Steve had continued. He tried to excuse what Bucky had done but stopped when Bucky warned him how it took away Tony’s right to be mad.
His parents had been killed. He was allowed to be upset over it. Tony was smart, he’d come to his own conclusion no matter what.
You missed the breaking news about Sergeant James Barnes being pardoned for his crimes as The Winter Soldier. You kissed the headlines about how he had lived, how he was better.
You missed everything right up until you went for your break and found two coffees waiting for you and your super soldier on the sofa.
“Fancy seeing you here.” He joked as you barreled into his arms.
“Not that surprising. Care homes are where you usually find men over one hundred.” You tell him, wiping your tears away. “Especially senile ones with faulty memories.”
“Promised you I’d come back.”
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Giggly Drunk Sex Headcanons | B.B.
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader
Word Count: 555
Warnings: NSFW 18+, reader is drunk/tipsy, consensual sex, sex happens but is not described (sorry guys lol)
Notes: Trying out a slightly different format. I couldn’t stop thinking of this today so bon apple teef! Happy reading!
So first and foremost there would probably be one of Stark's parties going on
You would tell Bucky that if you got drunk and horny that if he wanted to have sex with you to go for it (because consent is key)
You wouldn't get blackout drunk but you'd be pretty tipsy so stumbling a little, slurring some words, thoughts all over the place
Bucky would be dead sober because (1) he needs to watch you and (2) alcohol doesn't do anything to him anyways
And Bucky would be helping you walk back to your room and at some point would just pick you up bridal style
You'd be super giggly and touchy with him
Being carried bridal style means that you can focus on touching and kissing up on him since you don't have to focus on walking
You'd have your arms around his neck and would keep making him stop to kiss you and as he's walking you'd be kissing down his neck and leaving a bunch of hickies and failing to whisper sweet nothings in his ear
He'd be acting annoyed but secretly he would think it's the cutest fucking thing in the world how much you wanna kiss him and touch him and he'd be a blushing mess
Bucky wouldn't be thinking of what you had said earlier and would be thinking that he was just gonna put you to bed and cuddle for the rest of the night
But he'd make it back to the room and you'd let out a little squeal of excitement and he wouldn't be able to help laughing
He'd lower your back down onto the bed and begin to bend back up but your arms would be around his neck and would keep him down
You'd start kissing him again and now that he'd no longer be walking he'd let himself really kiss you and you'd start making out
You'd stop with your arms still around him to secure him down and be like "I love you so much Bucky" in between kisses "I love you baby"
And then you'd start undoing his black dress shirt that he wore and asking him if he remembered what you said
He'd ask you if you're still sure about that and you'd be giggling so much and say yes like four times just to get the point across
You’d get his shirt off and be running your hands all over his arms and chest and he’d be loving all the attention you’re giving him
He’d lean down and kiss you and slowly crawl on the bed over you and put his knee in between your legs
You’d stop momentarily to take off your dress off and you keep giggling and that would make him laugh and it would make you laugh even harder
You guys have really cute fluffy sex and every now and then break out laughing or into fits of giggles
Steve and Sam would walk down the hallway when they’re clocking out for the night and as they pass by your room they hear you guys moving but they also hear hushed giggles and just smirk and shake their heads
This would be one of the rare times Bucky would feel really care free
He’d be so happy to be laughing and to have you with all your energy and giggly sweetness there with him
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r. neighbor!bucky barnes x dark!reader | w. 3.2k | cw. nsfw 18+, minors dni, smut, drugs, alcohol, stalker behavior, reader is a little crazy, bucky doesn't even flinch tho, dd/lg, kidnap, poisoning someone [no one dies], use of handcuffs, mentions of violence.
note. hey lovies. first, the entire fic is one big warning, please proceed with caution. if you don't feel comfortable with dark topics, please don't read. I hope you like this, let me know what you think. as always, be nice and tomen agüita💋
summary. Bucky learns that not everything is at it seems, and his friendly little neighbor may be hiding more than he imagines.
DO NOT repost, translate or copy in any way my work. these are my babies, treat them as such and respect them (and me).
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The little town of Westview was nothing if not homey. The people were so nice, most of them had never left the town, but were always open to receive outsiders. You had moved here about six months ago, bought a nice little house with a garden to take care of, enough space for a home office, a lovely kitchen and the hottest neighbor one could ask for. Bucky Barnes was the number one mechanic in town, he had a shop not long from your house and you could swear, every time that man showed up riding his bike it was like the universe was laughing at you. Not only the man had the body of a god, he was also the sweetest person you’ve ever met in your life.
Bucky was the first one to welcome you to the neighborhood; you had been unpacking your boxes from the moving truck when he approached you. He had just come from work, his skin glowed with sweet and he smelled like leather and aftershave and you couldn’t help the appreciative look in your eyes as you roamed his body with your eyes. Sticking your tongue out, you licked your lower lip and Bucky followed the movement with his eyes. You could tell he also liked you, if not by the way his eyes lingered a little too long in your legs, by the way he grabbed your extended hand and flipped it so he could kiss your palm, sending shivers down your spine.
The little flirting game had been going on since that day; every morning before leaving for work Bucky would wave goodbye to you and every afternoon you would see him come home. No matter what you needed, he was always there. Something needed fixing around the house? He was your guy. After the incident when you slipped in the bathtub and dislocated your shoulder, he kept an extra eye on you, always making sure you were okay. In return, you would constantly take food over to his house. The man ate like a bear preparing for hibernation, you seriously had no idea how he was in such a good shape. But he loved everything you made; your baking specially. You took some brownies to a barbecue one of the neighbors hosted and Bucky demanded you made a whole batch just for him. You agreed, only if he would dance with you. And that he did, all night he waltz you around the little impromptu dance floor they set up. You’d never felt so happy, in the arms of the man you loved. There was no denying it, you were in love with Bucky Barnes. Which is why the fact of seeing him bringing some girl to his house one night hurt you like nothing else.
That was two weeks ago, Bucky had brought that girl back almost everyday for the past week and you were sick of it. At night the town got particularly quiet, which meant you could hear every noise coming from his house and just hearing her screechy voice screaming his name made you want to slid her throat open. You tried everything, loud music, meditation, noise cancelation headphones; just knowing she was there with him made something inside of you boiled with anger and you swore you’ve never hated anyone this much. Of course, it wasn’t enough to see her leave his house every morning, you also had to run into her at the worst time.
It was just a regular tuesday, you had gone to the supermarket to do some grocery shopping and of course the only cashier that was free was her. Tammy, that was her name. A blonde bimbo whose voice made your eyebrow twitch.
– Hey, I know you! Aren’t you Bucky’s neighbor? – mustering the best polite smile you could, you just nodded, trying to speed things up. Apparently, she had a different idea – He always talks about you! You just have to share some of your recipes with me, he adores your cooking – Over my dead body, you thought as you squinted your eyes and the smile in your face looked more threatening by the second.
For a moment you wondered what it would be like if you just took the credit card machine and shoved it down her throat. Bet that would shut her up. Given that you hadn’t said a word yet, and were just staring back a forth between her and the small device, Tammy was starting to feel uncomfortable and she didn’t understand why. Everyone had said you were so sweet, always helping around your neighbors, offering a smile and kind words to whoever may need it; this person in front of here was completely different and it scared her a little. Finishing faster than before, Tammy offered you the recipe and waved you goodbye as you walked away from her.
Soon, the days passed and a new town event was in full effect. As usual, you were in chart with the sweets, but since you needed to keep your hands busy from strangling a certain someone, you decided to help Earl with the drinks. Earl was a nice man, a little dumb and easily distracted, but he was respectful and making sure he didn’t mess anything up would help you ease your mind. Or so you hoped, and it was working, up until the moment the lovely couple from hell approached the tent. Now, a part of you knew this was wrong, but another one, the dominant one, thought it was only fair you had some fun after all the sleepless nights you’ve suffered lately. You knew by now she was wary at best with your attitude, so why not mess with her a little more? As you greeted both of them, you did your best to maintain the friendly smile you’ve been given to everyone all day. Not really interested in the small talk, you offered Bucky his drink and gave a different one to dear old Tammy.
– I hope you don’t mind, I made this especially for you. I just wanted to apologize for my attitude the other day, I was a little out of it and I’m afraid I may have scared you.
– You, doll? You wouldn’t scare a fly. – As Bucky chuckled under his breath your smile grew and you raised one eyebrow, your sight never leaving the blonde by his side. She had to take it, Bucky himself said it, you wouldn’t even scare a fly. You were the sweetest person, you would never do anything to harm her, right?
With a breathless little laugh, Tammy hesitantly took the drink, but didn’t do anything to taste it. You wouldn’t push, that would draw suspicions. So, you just wished them a good day and went on to attend to some new clients. However, you kept an eye on the couple and you couldn’t help to laugh when you saw Tammy sniffing the drink before taking a sip. The mental torture was fun enough, but the idea that her drink was filled with laxatives just added an extra kick, and when you saw her run towards the portable bathrooms, your day suddenly got better. Good thing was, in her rush, she actually dropped the cup to the floor, so all the evidence she could have to accuse you was splayed all over the grass. Not that it stopped her from accusing you to Bucky, which led to a fight. It was absurd, you would never do something like that. You were his angel… No, not his. Just, you were too pure for this world, you would never harm anyone.
Needless to say, Bucky defending you was not something Tammy needed at the moment. Specially after going to the hospital and her exams coming out clean. The doctor told her there wasn’t any substances in her blood other than the alcohol she admitted ingesting, much likely she just ate something that made her sick. However, she knew the truth. Bucky was tired of listening to her nag about you, so he told her it would be better for her to stay home that night, he needed some rest.
Meanwhile, you were sitting in your porch, enjoying the peace and quiet when the sound of his bike interrupted your train of thought. As he hopped off, you waved him a hello and he stopped a minute before approaching you. Talking to you always calmed him, and the last few weeks he’d barely even seen you. Supporting his weight in the rail, he leaned close to you and gave you a tired smile.
– Hey, angel. What are you doing up so late?
– Just wanted to enjoy the silent, it’s a beautiful night. Are you feeling okay? You seem upset
– ‘s nothing, don’t worry about it. You shouldn’t be alone out here at this hour, doll.
You shrugged your shoulders and focus on your feet swinging near the floor. He could tell something was bothering you, and he frowned as he walked around the rail to kneel in front of you and take your hands in his.
– Talk to me, sweets, what’s going on?
– You’re gonna think I’m dumb
– I would never think that about you, c’mon.
Taking a big inhale, you barely mumbled under your breath, but he couldn’t understand you. Seeing as you weren’t complying, he leaned into you and stared into your eyes. Oh my god, is this it? Is he going to kiss me? Yeah, no, think again. Bucky just wanted to get you to talk, and he thought the best torture technique would be tickling you until you gave up. You lasted a good 10 minutes before you couldn’t take it anymore.
– Fine! Ok! I can’t sleep in my room.
– And why is that, doll?
– I think there’s something wrong with my lamp, the other day it started to make weird sounds and it smelled like something was burning. I’m afraid to stay in there.
– Why didn’t you tell me that before?
– Well, you’ve been busy lately, it’s not like we’ve talked a lot.
As much as you tried to not let your jealousy show, he noticed and it made him smile. You were just too adorable.
– Let me take a look. If it’s too bad I can always come back in the morning and fix it for you.
– Oh, no. It’s too late and you look really tired, really, I don’t wanna be a bother.
– You could never bother me. Now, come on.
He had already done a few repairs around the house, so he knew exactly where everything was. As he made his way to your bedroom, you went to the kitchen to fix some lemonade for the both of you. When you went to give it to him, he had already taken off his jacket and was trying to figure out what the problem was.
– It may be some wiring problem, but I can’t really see it now. I think I’ll have to come back tomorrow with my tools and get a better look at it.
You agreed with him as you sipped your drink. Not long had passed before Bucky started to feel lightheaded. He stumbled a little in his feet and was trying to focus his eyesight, but everything was moving around him. He felt dizzy, like he was going to throw up. You quickly took the drink from his hand and helped him lay down on the bed before he blackout.
Slowly, Bucky’s senses were starting to wake up. He could smell your perfume and hear your low humming, he also notices he was naked, a little breeze ran through his body and made him shiver. When he tried to cover himself, though, he couldn’t move his arms. Opening his eyes, he saw they were chained to the bed he was currently sitting with his back against the headboard. The rattling of the cuffs against the iron alerted you of his awake state, making you come out of the bathroom. Another thing it took Bucky a moment to notice was that there was taped covering his mouth, so he couldn’t even speak.
– Oh, good, you’re awake! I was afraid the dose may have been a little too much, but hey, better safe than sorry, am I right?
Your soft smile alone with the innocent flicker of your eyes were a high contrast from this entire situation. However, being the man that he is, Bucky took a minute to run his eyes through your barely clothed body. You had taken off the summer dress you were previously wearing and the only thing covering you now was some lacy underwear that really did nothing to cover you up. He always wondered what you’d look like under your clothes, he never imagined this is how he would get to see you, though.
– Now, I know you probably are a little confused, but I assure you I mean no harm. You will always be safe with me, Bucky, but you’ve been a very bad boy and you deserve a punishment. – As you talked a pout formed in your glossy lips and you slowly approach him, siting with your legs on either side of his tight. Bucky didn’t move, he was feeling better, he was sure he’d done worse drugs back in the day, the effects of whatever you gave him quickly wearing off but he wanted to see what you’d do next.
You licked your lips while roaming your eyes over his body in appreciation. Noticing how Bucky’s cock twitched under your gaze, you bit your lip. He was hard already and you could feel the wetness in your pussy. Extending one finger, you took a little drop of precum before slipping in your mouth and moaning at the taste. Bucky was agitated, if his rapid breaths were any indication, and you could hear the muffled groan as you closed your eyes, still sucking your finger, while you rolled your hips. The lustful movement sending waves of pleasure at the brush of your clit against his tense muscles. Opening your eyes, you held his gaze as the movements turned more desperate. Releasing your finger with a pop, you dig your nails in his chest for support, prompting another groan from him.
Bucky’s eyes were filled with hunger, that adorable blue longed forgotten now with his dilated pupils. All he could see and feel was you, the smell of your arousal, your juices licking out your underwear and onto his leg, your sweet voice moaning his name, he was desperately trying to get out of the cuffs and when you were about to stop to check on his now bruised wrists, he flexed his tight muscles, giving you the push you needed to cum over his leg screaming his name. Trying to catch your breath, you fell on top of his chest and whimpered rubbing your body against his, your movements almost catlike. Raising your head, you left a kiss over the tape covering his mouth and giggled when you saw his frown.
– Oh, don’t look at me like that. I couldn’t resist it; you look just too good. Would you like me to help you out, baby? – You gestured to his throbbing erection as he shifted in his place. He really wanted to get out of these cuffs so he could fuck your brains out. He never imagined you would be like that, but he wasn’t going to complain.
Leaning closer to him, you ended up dragging your warm cunt against him and it made him throw his head back with a grunt.
– Now, I’m gonna take this from you. But you gotta promise me you’ll be a good boy and won’t start screaming or somethin’, okay? Think you can do that for me? – Bucky was getting tired of your patronizing tone and couldn’t wait to show you who was really in charge here, but he knew he needed to let you play so he could be free to show you a lesson later. So, he just nodded along and groaned when you ripped the tape from his mouth.
Leaving that aside, you kissed all the red area trying to soothe the irritation on his skin. He let out a sigh at the feel of your warm mouth and trapped your mouth in a sloppy kiss that made you whimper and press against him. Pulling back, Bucky stared at your dozed eyes and chuckled darkly.
– Goddamnit, angel, if I would have known you were this desperate for my cock, I would’ve fucked you a long time ago. – His words made you frown and pout as you stared at his chest, not wanting to look into his eyes.
– Well, you were too busy with your friend to notice me – You mumbled softly, and for a moment he forgot his confinement and tried to take you in his arms, only to huff at the restraint.
– I’m sorry I’ve neglected you, doll. Why don’t you let me make it up to you, huh? Let me outta these so I can properly show you how sorry I am. – Quickly you shook your head, you could feel the power shifting; he may be the one in cuffs, but you were already putty in his hands and every fiber in your being wanted to let him take charge.
– No, daddy – As the word slipped from you, a surprise gasp left your mouth and you ducked your head down in embarrassment. That only excited Bucky more, he wanted you begging for his cock.
– Why not, angel?
– I have to punish you; you were mean to me and if I let you free, you’re just gonna leave again with her.
– Oh, sweets, trust me, there’s no other place I’d rather be. And this is hurting me. You don’t want that, do you? Good girls don’t hurt their daddy.
Praying to the universe you weren’t making a mistake, you hesitantly nodded and lifted yourself up to undo the restraints. It took less than a minute for Bucky to grab your hips as soon as he was free and pull yourself over his lap. In this new position your pussy was rubbing against his cock and it made you whimper his name as he teased your entrance.
– You’ve been a brat, angel. Tell me, all this just to get my attention? – You were trying to sink into him a fuck yourself but his iron hold wouldn’t let you; seeing that you weren’t answering his question, Bucky gave a quick slap to your ass that made you moan – Is my dumb baby unable to answer a simple question? You were so confident before, baby, what happened?
– I-I’m sorry, daddy. I just want you, please.
– Well, since you ask so nicely. – In one thrust you were filled with his cock hitting that spongy spot inside of you that made your eyes roll to the back of you head. You were so wet from your previous orgasm that Bucky decided not to prepare you, he knew you could take it.
Delivering one brutal thrust after the other you could feel the second orgasm of the night approaching as you cried out his name. Your nails dug little moon shapes along his arms and shoulders. The only sounds were the ones coming out of both of you, and the pounding of the bed against the wall. It didn’t take long for him to fill you with his cum. As you both were catching your breath, you tried to get up to give him some room, but he just pulled you against his chest before flipping you up to lay between your open legs.
– Where you going, angel? I’ve barely got started with you.
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Anything | B.B.
Summary: Bucky is NOT in love with reader (except he very much is). Bucky catches reader during a small depressive episode and comforts her.
Pairing: Bucky x Reader
Word Count: 1.3k
Warnings: Mention of depression, Bucky being sweet, slight angst
Notes: This was an idea I got at 3am and I’m not sure how I feel about this but it helped me get out of my writing slump :)) Happy reading!
Bucky only had two friends in his life, Steve and you. Steve was his brother, in childhood, in war, in life. To him it just made sense that that was how having a friend should feel. That’s how it felt when he met you. He could see you were a pretty woman, most of the women on the team were, but he never felt attracted to you in a way that was any different than seeing a pretty woman on the street. When he joined the team there was no shocking, firework-and-spark-producing moment that solidified you as partners, it just happened over time. The two of you felt naturally drawn together, if it came down to it, both of you were sure you’d have each others’ backs.
After weeks of training together and the team seeing the natural bonding between you, Steve set you up as partners for all missions. Through those missions you’ve taken hits for him and he’s carried you bloody back to the quinjet. Bucky often thought about the memory of you laughing and coughing up blood at the way he yelled your name when you jumped in front of him; Steve was his brother, but you were definitely his best friend. That was it.
Bucky faintly remembered the feeling of romantic attraction. When he was young, he had his fair share of dames kissing up to him and an even smaller bunch that he really liked back. However, life had been cruel, and he hadn’t had much time to sustain the memory of the fluttery emotion he got whenever the girl he liked would walk into the dance hall. He figured he would probably never feel it again, and he had accepted that his life was far too involved in other things to bring him back to that vulnerable state.
Life really was cruel, but it was also complicated. Even though the memories were faint, he started to notice more and more how, when you’d make that face at him during boring meetings and try to hold in your laughter, he felt like that 20 year old kid who’s hands would shake when asking his best girl for a dance. It was moments like those that he wondered if your eyes had always sparkled like that, or if your lips always looked that soft. It was moments like those that he wished he had forgotten the feeling altogether. You were his partner, his best friend, he wasn’t supposed to like you, at least he wasn’t in love with you. He disregarded it to the feeling of being close with a woman again. Of course, you were pretty, nice, funny, and trustworthy, that was all. He wasn’t in love with you, the friendship you two had was just really good. That was it. He’d just keep telling himself that that was it.
You had already confided in Bucky about your depression, about the weeks where the cloud that followed you constantly would completely crush you. He knew about the nights you wouldn’t sleep because of all the dark thoughts that took the spotlight in your head. Those were the times Bucky missed you the most. During those times, the dark would inhabit you like a crab taking temporary residence in a shell, leaving the person he knew stranded somewhere to find her way back.
It was happening again. Bucky noticed how you went straight to your room and didn’t come out after the last mission. He noticed how you would silently make your dinner, flash a half smile to the team and retreat back to safety. He noticed how the muscles in your face drooped despite how much sleep it seemed you were getting.
Unlocking the door of his room and stepping out into the wide hallway, Bucky, clad in sweatpants and a loose shirt, made to the kitchen in search of a glass of water before bed. The night was unusually quiet in the residence floor of the compound. It was only eleven, yet the lights were dimmed and there were no stray members wandering around. He could hear his steps, how the sound changed as he left the carpeted hallway and entered the hardwood floors of the lounging area.
You almost spooked him, the way you sat in the dark. He observed your place at the head of the dining room table, the length of it emphasizing your solitude. Your head was buried in your hands, slowly rising from them to stare at the wall in front of you with a blank expression. You looked tired. Bucky could see it, but he still admired the way your silhouette moved in the soft light. A pang of guilt tugged at his heart, how could he be thinking of you like this when you were clearly hurting? He couldn’t help it, he could push down his feelings, but there was nothing to distract him from how beautiful you were.
Bucky stayed in the shadows, watching you with furrowed brows. He wasn’t sure if you wanted to be bothered, you were obviously out there to be alone. You took in a shaky breath as a line of light reflected its way down your face, following the tear running down it.
He closed his eyes. There was no more running, no more distractions, there was nothing else but you. He knew he was in love the moment he saw you sitting there, in fact, he had known it well before that. He had known it from the first time you managed to get the upper hand in a sparring match against him, from the time you asked him to help you bake cookies even though he burnt them the time before, from the time you had saved him a seat at the table even when he didn’t come out to eat, from all the times you smiled through injuries and he vowed to do anything to make the pain bearable.
His eyes opened, he would always vow to do anything to make the pain bearable.
Bucky took small steps towards the table and stood next to you. He looked down at you and cursed himself for thinking of how pretty you were. Shaking the thought out of his head, he focused his gaze on your slumped shoulders, he could think about that later, right then he had to be your best friend. Wordlessly, he pulled your shoulders and held you to his abdomen, taking deep breaths so that you would feel the steady rise and fall of his stomach. You closed your eyes, matching his breathing.
The two of you stayed like that for what felt like hours to Bucky. As much as holding you like this was something he had imagined countless times, he just wanted to know you were okay, some kind of assurance.
Your head turned up, your chin coming forward to lean on him. Bucky met your gaze, keeping eye contact as he lifted his flesh hand to cradle your head. Your eyes were glassy and your lips swollen.
“Thank you, Bucky.” It was the faintest whisper, Bucky would have missed it if he wasn’t already looking at your lips. You turned your head back down, resting the side of your head against him. Bucky swallowed the lump in his throat.
Bucky tried not to focus on how you felt in his arms, or how your head felt on his stomach, or how the tears made your eyes glimmer. He tried not to think about how things would be different now that he couldn’t hide his feelings from himself anymore. He didn’t want to think about how he wasn’t supposed to love you, about how it would go nowhere, so he didn’t.
Closing his eyes, he held you tighter. He had you, at the very least he was keeping to his vow to do anything to make the pain bearable. You were his person, and he was your best friend. If that was all he could be, then at least he had you.
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Pairing- Bucky Barnes x F! reader (Y/N)
Word Count- 1646
Warnings- canon typical violence, angst, language
Summary- Y/N is a top notch agent that left SHIELD years ago on not so great of terms. Now she is forced to go back and face the past, including a blue-eyed someone she used to call her best friend.
A/N- Here’s an angsty little something I cooked up to vent. Based loosely on some real life issue and events. I truly wrote this for myself to help deal with things. It’s a five part mini series.Let me know if you’d like to be added to the tags
Crouching, you braced yourself for the pounce that your opponent was about to release in an effort to take you down. The beefy bastard across from you was a brute force on the mat, but you were tired of him winning every sparring match.
Today, you were taking this son a bitch down.
As he sprung to come at you, you spun to the side and grabbed his bicep to propel yourself onto his back and grab hold of his neck from behind with your arm. Hanging from his neck in an effort to use your weight to take him down, you suddenly felt the world begin to spin as the beast of a man began to turn in circles. As he picked up momentum, you could feel your grip on his neck slipping and the next thing you knew you were flying through the air, then collided with a nearby wall.
Catching your breath, you slowly stood up to see the man had flung you with centrifugal force into a wall about 10 feet away from the sparring mat. You gathered the little bit that remained of your pride and walked back to the group of onlookers standing around the arena.
Once you rejoined the group, which was already watching the next match, you heard a woman’s voice behind you, “You had the right idea, but you've got to use your legs for a move like that.”
Turning around, you saw that Natasha was standing behind you.
“I was trying to use my weight to take him down. If I held on with my legs, it wouldn’t have been as strong on his neck,” you explained.
“Actually if you hold your legs low enough you can gain more force on the neck by crunching down. And you have more security and won’t get shot off into a wall,” she countered.
“Got it. Thank you.”
“No problem,” she smirked and then walked away.
At the end of sparring practice, you gathered your stuff and began walking towards the exit of the gym when you were greeted by familiar blue eyes. Leaning sideways against a door frame was Bucky, who was popping cashews in his mouth as he grinned at you.
“Are you ever not eating?” you greeted him.
“I’m a growing boy,” he frowned at you. “You give my regards to that wall?”
“Ugh, you saw that?” you asked as he nodded in return. “Wait, how long have you been here?”
“Long enough to see you fly through the air and hit that wall.”
“Don’t you have more important Avengers business to attend to than watch sparring training? You know, some damsel in distress or global crisis?” you scoffed.
“I’m not terribly interested in damsels. Gotta see how my best girl is doing,” he smiled at you.
Since your initial meeting at the teambuilding lecture, you and Bucky had grown quite close. It began with your second encounter with him at the firing range where he showed you a better way to grip your firearm, which you found to be quite effective. He then offered to coach you weekly with different weapons. From there, you two had started texting and hanging out outside of work related events and trainings.
From the start, it was easy when the two of you were together. Conversations flowed, time passed, it was always comfortable with Bucky. He had quickly become your closest friend at SHIELD and always had your back.
“Seriously, why are you here?” you pressed.
“I have a mission coming up next week,” he started.
“Ok, how long are you going to be gone? You need me to take care of Alpine?” you asked, curious as to why he would show up to tell you something he usually texted.
“Nat’s going to take care of Alpine. I’m here because I wanted to ask if you’d care to join the team on this mission?”
“R-really? You know this would be my first special mission,” you reminded him.
“Yeah I know. But Steve and I will both be there and I think you’re ready. That’s why I specifically asked for you to be part of this,” he said nonchalantly.
“You asked for me? Specifically?” you questioned in disbelief.
“Yeah. You’re by far one of the most resourceful recruits in there and I honestly think you’ve been ready for some time,” he explained. “So whatcha think? You want to go get some bad guys?”
“Yes! Oh my gosh Bucky, thank you,” you exclaimed as you threw your arms around his neck in an appreciative hug. “This means so much. Thank you, thank you, thank you.”
“Sure thing, doll,” he said back as he returned the hug.
Several weeks had passed and you were getting acquainted with your new position and teams. Your mom was progressively doing better and better. Overall you had started to find your own swing to life at the Avengers tower again. It was still nothing like the joy and comfort you had once known with the sHIELD family, but for now it was enough.
Interactions between you and Bucky were kept to a minimum. Most days you didn’t see him and if you needed to communicate for any reason, e-mail was your savior. On the occasions where you did have to interact in person, your talks were short and kept strictly to business.
Then one night while you were sitting in your office finishing a report you heard a soft knock at your door.
“It’s open,” you called, not looking up from your laptop.
“You always did go above and beyond to get a job done,” the familiar voice said and broke you away from your typing.
“What are you doing here Bucky?”
“I came to see how you’re doing.”
“At 11:30 on a Wednesday night? Bullshit,” you asserted.
“I am technically your boss and if I see someone working this late, I kind of have a moral obligation to check on them,” he defended.
You stared at him, not buying his excuse, waiting for more.
“I also need your help,” he continued.
“Here it is,” you sighed.
“Here what is?”
“The fuckening,” you told him.
“Wh-what is the fuckening?” He inquired.
“Everything had been running too good, for too long. This is the point where everything starts to turn to shit. It's the fuckening,” you explained.
He simply stared back at you, confused.
“What is it you need my help with?” you asked.
“I need you to run a job with me. And before you sa—“
“Before you say no, just hear me out. Please,” he begged.
Unsure of where this was heading, you leaned back in your chair and folded your arms across your chest. “Fine, tell me about the job and why you need me.”
“Ok, so you know about the Flag Smashers?” He started.
“I’ve read the reports.”
“Well they have a new operative and they’re stronger than before. We need someone to get on the inside with them. Someone experienced and unknown to them,” he explained.
“You want me to infiltrate the Flag Smashers. Why? Don’t you have some top notch recruit that is itching to have their big break?” you postulated.
“I have tons of agents and recruits. None as good as you.”
“You’re so full of shit,” you spit at him.
“What are you talking about? You’re one of the best agents I’ve ever worked with and you know it,” he told you, raising his voice in frustration.
“If I’m so great, then why?”
“Why didn’t I get that promotion years ago?” you questioned in a raised voice to counter his.
“Not this again,” Bucky sighed and rolled his head away.
“This again? How about this still!” you snarled, exasperated by his dismissal of your feelings. “Do you not understand how much that hurt me? How you stripped me of my dream?”
“How many times do we have to go through this? I’ve told you time and time again, the decision was made with the best interest of the team. It had nothing to do with your ability, how much you are appreciated here, or the relationship between you and I,” he argued.
“That’s such a load of crap and you know it. I can’t believe you’re still spouting that same story after all this time.”
“I’m saying it after all this time because it’s true. You’re one of the best agents we have ever had and your ability to strategize is unparalleled,” Bucky retorted.
“Then what the fuck? If I’m so special, why was I passed up? And what did you expect me to do? Just stick around and watch everyone get their dream job, but me?” you croaked on the verge of tears.
“You’re a spoiled brat, you know that. You got everything while you were here and it was never enough. Then the one time you don’t get your way, you run half away across the world and abandon all that you know in some sort of tantrum,” he spat at you.
“Fucking finally. That’s the most truthful thing you’ve said to me in a long time. Tell me Buck, what else do you think of my actions?” you prodded, cocking your head sideways and giving him a glare that dared him to speak more truth.
Clenching his fists as he sighed, Bucky opened his mouth then closed it again before saying anything. You watched as he then tightened his jaw, causing a muscle to twitch as it always did when he was flustered or on edge. “Y/N, are you going to help with this Flag Smashers case or not?” he asked with clenched teeth.
“Send me the file and I’ll look it over. I’ll let you know in the morning,” you said, resigned to end the conversation.
“Fine,” he sighed, then left your office, closing the door behind him.
Tags- @sltwins @capmanranger @maryosprinkle @angstysebfan @stevetonycupcakes
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r. bucky barnes x reader | w. 1.9k | cw. minors DNI, violence, alcohol consumption, some angst, fatws spoilers [kinda], loki spoilers [maybe, but not really], sexual tension, some smut implied, lovers to enemies kinda, reader really hates Strange.
note. hello lovelies! first off, shoutout to my one and only@fairyevans for all the help, ily bby astro💜 second, this is my little baby and I really hope you like it. feel free to give me some feedback. as always, be nice and tomen agüita💋
DO NOT repost, translate or copy in any way my work, these are my babies, treat them as such and respect them (and me).
time(less) AU: part I | part II | part III | part IV
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SPOILERS BELOW THE CUT!
As soon as I appeared in my room, I noticed I wasn’t alone. Someone’s broken into my apartment. How the fuck. I was about to freeze time when I remembered the reprimand I’d just gotten. Damn. Okay. Let’s go old school on this. Summoning two daggers in my hands I slowly stepped into the living room, a familiar tingling in my skin. No, it can’t be. I must be dreaming, because there’s no way in hell James Barnes was laying on my couch like he owned the place while he played with my favorite knife.
– Good, you’re home.
[a few thousand years ago]
Around it time stood still, and they worshipped it like a god. No one really knew what it was, where it came from or what it could do, but nothing around it seemed to ever perish. Animals and plants, space and time, all stood as it once was, never changing, never dying. My parents thought it would save me. They had no idea what it would do to me. It’s not their fault, I never really blamed them, they did the best they could with what little they had. Back then things were different, and I wasn’t strong enough to survive on my own. Hell, I wasn’t strong enough to survive at all. That was until we heard the stories, of a place so deep within the forest only a few could reach it alive. Only someone desperate enough would take that chance. Turns out, we were.
It was supposed to be a simple ritual, say some prayers, we didn’t really know. Expect the unexpected, that’s what they told us. We had no idea how over our head we really were. The stone, now I know it very well, it’s a part of me. The memories of that day, it’s like it happened to somebody else. I remember my father carrying me, my legs couldn’t hold me up anymore, we’d been walking for so long now. I didn’t know it at the time, but the oxygen level around it was extremely low. My mother was the first one to fall, my father next. I don’t really know how I actually made it there. There was a voice, like a chant dragging me near. Its light attracted me like a moth to a flame.
My body was too weak, as it turns out. My soul, on the other hand, was stronger than it ever was. As I felt my body perish, I learned my first and most important trick: I can always come back. It took me some years to find a new body, even longer to perfect my skills, but eventually I did it. The stronger I got, the more I learned, the more trouble I seemed to find myself in. Thanks to the powers of the Stone and my particular coming to life, I wasn’t really part of the timeline. Which means that I wasn’t supposed to exist, but it didn’t really disrupt it as long as I behaved. I existed outside of space and time, or so they said.
It took me a second to process everything, why was he in here? I just ran into him a few hours ago and he didn’t show any signs of knowing who I was. Doing a quick sweep of the are I noticed the balcony doors were open, we were on the 30th floor. I get the whole “Winter Soldier” thing, but did he learn how to fly all of a sudden or what? My thoughts were interrupted when I saw him approaching me. I want to say that my first reaction was purely my self-defense instinct kicking in but, in reality, I’ve been wanting to do this for a long time. Bucky had lowered the knife and was moving slowly, carefully, like he didn’t want to scare me; his lips were moving, but I couldn’t hear anything as my body moved. It was so fast it took him by surprise and I’m proud to say he stumbled in his feet; with a kick to his chest, I didn’t exactly knock him down, but it was a good start. As I charged in with my knife, he catched my fist and turned my arm as to pull me close to his chest.
Now, what happened next may be considered cheating by some, but to those people I say: bite me.
With a flick of my wrist, Bucky’s movement slowed down long enough for me to free myself and turn the tables in my favor. It was mere seconds, nothing that could easily be noticed, I hoped, but it allowed me to push him off of me, and as I took my momentum, my legs surrounded his head as I flipped him on to the floor. By now, he was moving normally and was struggling to let out of my hold. I growled as I squeezed my tights around his head, I could tell he was holding himself back and, in reality, I wasn’t really hurting him. The man’s a super soldier, if I wanted to hurt him, I would have to try harder. For a moment, he stopped struggling and I eased my hold, maybe I did hurt him, had he gotten weaker?
He hasn’t, in fact, he’s a pretty sneaky bastard, if you ask me. He noticed my hesitation and took advantage of it. As if I weighted nothing, he quickly flipped me and held my hands with one arm as he pushed my body to the ground. At some point, in the middle of the struggle, I’d lost my knives, not that it really mattered, I could always summon a different weapon. It was hard to think straight, however, when I could feel everything pressed so close to me. It was like time hasn’t passed and I hated myself for it. I hated how much power he held over me. I hated that under his arms I went back to that seventeen-year-old girl that danced the night away and laughed till her stomach hurt. I hated that my body reacted to him, recognizing his warm as my own, claiming him; an ache deep within me screaming his name, begging for him as many times before. I let my forehead rest on the wooden floor as I took a deep breath, stopping the tears from falling, a sob wanting to break from my chest. His voice brought me back to reality, like a siren incantation, luring me to that happiness I’ve so desperately craved.
– Not that I complain about being between your legs, doll, but we have some things to discuss first. – He practically growled in my ear, he was pissed, I could tell by his tone. I could feel his warm breath against my neck and it made me shiver, cursing under my breath as the slight movement made me brush against him. I could tell I wasn’t the only one affected by the closeness and I enjoyed the little fill of pride in my chest.
– The only thing we have to discuss is how did you break into my apartment and how soon are you leaving – Trying to get out of his grip only ended in me grinding against the very hard bulge on his pants and it made you flush as he groaned in your ear.
– Now you’re just being a tease, princess. I’ll let you go, only if you promise to be a good girl for me and behave. Hmm, sugar, think you can do that? – He said that so close to my skin I could feel his beard scratching my neck and a tingle sparked my lower belly as I wondered if it would still feel as good that burning between my legs. I could feel my body heating up and this wasn’t about the physical struggle anymore, this was different, I hadn’t felt this in ages.
Being unable to find my voice and cursing myself for my weakness, I just nodded and he slowly stood up, releasing his grip on me. As the old gentleman I remembered, he offered me his hand to help me stand up and I just snapped it away and huffed, refusing to look at him as I made my way to the bar. I needed a drink, immediately. Really, could my day get any worse? Leaning into the marble counter I reached for my favorite tequila and chugged down a drink. I felt the burning liquor run through me as some kind of cleansing water and after taking several breaths I turned to see Bucky. He hadn’t said a word yet, but he was studying me, I could feel it, his eyes were piercing through me. Throwing my jacket on a chair I took a moment to enjoy the appreciation in his eyes as he checked out my chest in a top. Motioning for him to sit down, I offered the bottle I was just drinking from. As I saw him drink from it, I couldn’t help but thinking it was almost poetic, like an indirect kiss. Licking my bottom lip, I sat in front of him in the coffee table.
– So, Sarge, what brings you to my humble abode? And what can I do to get you out of it?
– I have some questions for you first – He leaned back in the chair and I nodded for him to speak, may as well get this over with and I could find out how much exactly he remembers, if anything – How do you know me?
So that’s a no in remembering, okay. Well, the how is a little fuzzy, Sarge, I just remember playing the medium gig at the fair and you suddenly showing up when I was having fun with your girlfriend. The thought made me laugh, his first words to me were “This is a scam”, and yet he stayed and listened to everything I had to say. Clearing my throat as I bit my lip trying to hide my smile, I shrugged my shoulders like it wasn’t a big deal.
– Everyone knows Captain America’s BFF.
– Then why did you run away when you saw me in the street?
– Are you trying to tell me you usually have fangirls screaming your name and asking for autographs?
– Not exactly… But you don’t strike me as the type to get scared. Back then when you were fighting me, you were upset, not afraid. I need to know why.
– You don’t think I have enough reason to be upset? You breaking into my apartment and all?
I noticed he was growing frustrated, I knew what he wanted to know, but I just couldn’t tell him. How do you tell someone your souls are technically bounded, because you technically did a spell before he went to war so he wouldn’t die? Also, I couldn’t deny there was a small part of me that felt hurt that he actually forgot about me. I certainly never forgot about him, and it’s not like all this time I’ve been tanning in a beach.
– Look – I paused for a moment as he leaned closer to me and I could inhale his scent, he always smelled so good – Why don’t you just tell me what you want from me? – He looked at me for a minute and I did my best not to squirm under his gaze.
– I have a job for you.
– I’ve heard about your work. It took me some time to find you, everyone seems to believe you’re a ghost; but I saw you that day, at Sharon’s party. Let’s save us the time when you deny it, you were there, I know you saw me and for a moment everything stood still and you disappeared, wanna explain that, sugar?
– How did you–?
– Yeah, I also noticed your little trick back there. My guest is you’re some kind of sorcerer, like Strange…
– Excuse you, I am nothing like that man – I snorted with disgust; his eyes opened with surprise and a little laugh left him.
– My bad. Didn’t mean to offend you, dollface.
– So, what’s this job you got for me? Aren’t you one of the good guys now?
– I… I’m working on it. That’s why I want you, you’re gonna help me find The Power Broker.
Now that, I was not expecting it.
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The Last Chthonian
Bucky x Reader, Sam x Reader, Zemo x Reader
A/N: It is here! So sorry for the late update lovelies! I’ve been having really bad writers block lately and my job keeps switching my hours up so now my sleep schedule is all fucked up. And after writing this part I want to go stargazing so bad but the light pollution kind of sucks where I live. 🥲 Also this is my first time writing a steamy scene so I’m sorry if it’s awkward. Feedback is much appreciated and let me know if you want to be added to the tag list. 😊
Summary: Imagine being Hekate, the Greek goddess of magic and witchcraft, the night and the moon, doorways and crossroads, creatures of the night, and ghosts and necromancy. You stumbled upon Earth many centuries ago and since then have resided on the foreign planet. During the recent years you created an alias for yourself to hide your true identity, and after the war against Thanos you chose to live out your days in the Scottish countryside, until a certain trio appears at your doorstep one day.
Warnings: language, angst, some foreplay and making out
You had still been wrapped in Zemo’s arms, the two of you indulging in each other’s presence in a silence, which combined with the faint beating of his heart, you only found to be comforting. The meteors still swept by the earth’s atmosphere above you in flashes that lit up the sky, leaving behind trails of white that resembled the strokes of a brush, as if your mother Asteria had painted the celestial bodies using diamonds onto a canvas that was the night sky. You could only make out the few stars and constellations that were scarcely scattered across the vastness above you, caused by the light pollution that unfortunately managed to mantle the wonders and beauty that settled just beyond, separating humanity from the marvels of the universe. The stars flickered like the diminishing of the flame of a candle, a farewell to the billions of years lived by the remnants of those enormous spheres of hot plasma, thus leaving behind the birth of other stars to fulfill their legacy. However, there was a certain star that did not flicker like the ones around it, a certain spectacle distant in time and space that still managed to burn bright despite the innumerable amount of light-years that separated Earth from it. The remaining light of your planet Olympus. You stared at that particular star, your brows knit together and your face etched with this certain melancholy that one could not explain. How could one thing be so near, within the reach of your fingertips, and yet be entirely outside the capacity of reach.
“Draga.” You heard Zemo softly speak, his chest slightly wavering beneath your cheek from his words.
“Something troubles you.”
“What makes you say that?” You stared off, your eyes still fixated to the fading existence of your world.
“Your eyes draga.” Zemo looked down at you, his eyes scanning over the troubled creases that masked your features. “I have seen this shadow in your eyes that has seemed to occupy them as of recently. What troubles you?”
“…………You see that star there, right between those two constellations?” You pointed above you.
“Mhm.” Zemo nodded as he followed the line of your finger, his eyes now focused on the same exact star yours have not yet left.
“That’s my planet………Olympus.”
“You’re welcome to tell me about it if you’d like.”
“Well, when I was little, I used to live with my mother in this quaint cottage by the sea, similar to the one I live in now with my daughter. She used to bring me out most nights for stargazing. She had built this outdoor platform with bedding and blankets and we would have a small fire going to keep us warm as we watched the stars and constellations while she told me different tales and epic poetries. As silly as it sounds, she would make shooting stars appear in the sky for me knowing how much I loved them. Gods, I wish you could’ve seen my home back in its days, back when everything still remained. Everything was so…..beautiful, and the skies, gods the skies, you could see the different planets and galaxies as if they were only miles away. To this day, I have yet to see anything in my travels that compares.”
“I would have loved to seen it Schatzi. Your mother sounded like a wonderful person.”
“She was the kindest soul I knew.” You turned your body so that you could look up at him, resting your chin on your hand.
“You miss her.”
“There’s not a day that goes by that I don’t miss my family and planet.”
“I’m sorry about what happened to them Schatzi. I wish you never went through what you did.”
“If only I could bring them back. I’d do anything to be able to just see them again.”
Zemo was silent, believing that no amount of words could have provided you comfort, no matter how deep the meaning or how significant. He could not imagine what you went through. He had lost his country and his family, and you had lost your family as well, but you lost your world, your entire race, leaving you to be the last remaining entity of your people, the last Olympian and the last Chthonian. Words could not bring your family back, just as they could not with his. So he only did what he was able, making a silent unspoken promise within the abyss of his damaged heart to be there for you as he held you closer to him and pressed a kiss to your forehead.
A sudden feeling of guilt crawled up your spine like a venomous scorpion ready to sink its stinger in your skin with means to cause nothing but pain and suffering. You felt guilty for being here, lying next to Zemo wrapped in his arms like a pair of star-crossed lovers from the pages of a novel. A part of you felt selfish for what you did, undeserving of the affection that was bestowed upon you from a man who had suffered enough from the loss of his family. How much longer did you think you could give in to your mindless emotions without a single thought of the consequences it might bring about. Did you really think you could go on as if nothing is happening? As if you can conceal your true form from him forever. No. You could not. You did not have the heart to keep such knowledge from him. If you wanted to pursue what you had with him, you would have to tell him the truth when the time came.
“We should probably get back before Sam and Bucky notice.” You mumbled, blinking back the tears, your heart aching to go back to the way things used to be, wishing you could leave all of this and just be able to go back home. You didn’t belong here on earth, an immortal amongst mortals. At least on Olympus, if your titaness form had been revealed, many would not have bat an eye. They had already seen the likes of Titans before and the locals had become accustomed to you. But here on earth, you were nothing but a stranger, a drifter.
The two of you walked back to his place in silence, the only sounds being the whistling of the wind, the chirping of crickets, the voices of the few pedestrians and the humming of the cars that drove by. Your hands brushed against each other, craving to intertwine your fingers with his as you walked down the stone paved streets lit by the lamps that lined it, the two of you still withdrawn despite what occurred between you both. You felt it would have been silly, holding his hand like a couple of teenagers, though a century ago, you wouldn’t have gave it a second thought.
You arrived at his place, standing at the bottom of the steps in front of the double doors with Zemo opposite you, illuminated by the street lamp that stood just behind. Feelings of conflict washed over you, drowning you in waves of despair. As much as you wanted to be with him, a small part in the back of your mind kept telling you that it was wrong. Neither of you wanted to go through those doors just yet, wishing you could have spent the night under the stars. But life seems to have a way of working against your favor. The Wakandans would be here to collect him possibly tomorrow, and you would have to bid him farewell, separated from each other for what could be forever. As much as you did not look forward to that moment in having to turn him in and never see him again, you wouldn’t stop the Wakandans from what they were promised. And though you hadn’t said a word, Zemo had already knew what your decisions were regarding it, and he could not blame you for it. You were a woman of justice and you followed a code, and he respected that.
“Zemo.” A frown appeared on your face.
“Please,” Zemo whispered to you as he pushed a strand of your hair behind your ear, “Call me Helmut.”
You looked at Zemo once more, a look of longing hidden behind your eyes as you unconsciously swiped your tongue across your mouth, watching how his eyes followed the movement before lingering on the wetness of your lips that resembled the petals of a rose after the pouring of cold rain in the midst of spring. Oh how he wished to be the drops of rain that were gifted the pleasure of grazing upon the velvety petals that belonged to such beauty of a flower, a symbol of union between the two domains in which the heavens came down to declare its love for the earth. A pulling sensation filled within your core, drawing yourself to Zemo as if he were the sweet berries of deadly nightshade that have lured many unfortunate souls. Banishing the thoughts of doubt that clouded your mind, you grabbed him by the collar and pulled him to you, crashing your lips against his in a heated kiss. Zemo was initially shocked by your bold gesture and stiffened from the way your mouth moved against his, surprised you would pull something like this when just a wall away Sam and Bucky were awaiting your arrival, before loosing himself into your embrace.
Your fingers clenched the collar of his sweater and your fingers grazed across the exposed skin of his neck while his hands went to your waist in a desperate attempt, fumbling to grab at anything and bunching up the bottom fabric of your sweater as he pulled you against him. The tips of his fingers brushed against the skin of your waist that was exposed below the hem of your sweater, leaving behind goosebumps in its trail. You smiled into the kiss from the way he completely melted under your touch, a part of you amused from the affect you held over him as you managed to elicit a moan from deep within his throat. Zemo’s brows were furrowed in the passionate moment, something you have noticed when you first kissed him, a small crease in the muscles of his face that showed just how lost he was when encased in this moment with you, and it absolutely melted you. He was addicted from the warm numbness, the ecstasy he felt from kissing you. Your lips were like heroin to him, leaving him yearning for more, and it didn’t ameliorate the fact that his years spent in a German prison had left him somewhat inexperienced and filled with a chasmic longing for touch and intimacy from the lack thereof. Deep within him, masked by his ideas and objectives, Zemo wanted to be able to love someone again, a chance at a new life and a family, and perhaps, he saw that possibility with you. But, behind the passion of the kiss you shared with him, there was something else, a poison that laced your lips with feelings of despair and forbidding that consumed you as if you had tasted those sweet berries of nightshade, slowly loosing yourself to its malice. His lips which were at first warm to the touch, now felt cold like ice and sent shivers of dread through your veins, as if this would be the last kiss you shared with him.
You pulled away from the kiss to catch your breath, your teeth softly grazing against his bottom lip as you did so. Both of you were left breathless as you rested your foreheads against each other, panting as your breaths fanned each other’s face as if you had just been trapped in the depths of the ocean before breaking through the surface to allow oxygen to fill your lungs.
“If you keep doing that Draga.” Zemo rasped between breaths, “I won’t be able to compose myself.”
“Good. Maybe I don’t want you too.” You smirked before placing a playful kiss on the tip of his nose. “But I really should go back inside, and you should do the same. Just make sure you go unnoticed.” You slipped his coat off your shoulders, his cologne that lingered on his fur collar leaving your senses with discontent as you returned his coat to him before going over to the doors, stopping to turn back to him with a smile before stepping inside and closing the door behind you. Gods, what the hell did you do that for???? You felt your cheeks heat up in embarrassment as you wanted to slap yourself for pulling a move like that.
“Gods I’m stupid.” You muttered to yourself.
“Hey.” Bucky smiled once he spotted you, his voice soft as if he were afraid you would shatter at any moment from the discussion that took place earlier. “How was your walk?”
“It was nice, relaxing. I went to the park to stargaze.”
“That’s good. As long as you feel better.”
“I do, actually. Thanks Bucky.”
“You look flushed. You okay?” Sam noted as he stepped over to you.
“Huh?” You stopped short. “Oh yeah, I’m fine. I just had to kind of uh power walk back here so you guys wouldn’t get worried. But I’m fine, yeah. Anyways, I’m going to hit the sack since I’m feeling a bit tired. Goodnight you guys.” You waved them off before going to your assigned room, making Sam and Bucky give each other questioning looks before they both shrugged it off.
You shut the door behind you, letting out a breath of relief that they had not caught on to anything and praying that Zemo had managed to sneak in. You had just gotten off the phone with Maze and your daughter, catching up on their activities after cleaning yourself up and changing into your nightgown. You had pulled up a chair next to the window that was in your room, your feet tucked underneath you and a warm cup of rose and blackberry tea in your hands. Your robe hung loosely off your shoulders as your index finger twirled above the small silver spoon that swirled in your cup, mists of violet wrapping around the handle of the spoon as you used your powers to stir the contents of the tea. You stared out the window onto the old streets of Latvia before glancing down at the teacup that was nestled in your hands, the glow of your eyes reflected off the window pane along with the tiny stars that swirled through the small globe of your necklace your mother gave you. You hadn’t stopped thinking about the moments that passed and the ones that have yet to come.
There was a knock on your door, interrupting you from the thoughts that had resided in your mind. “Come in.” You spoke as you looked through the reflection of the window and saw a figure step in. “Zemo?” You stopped using your powers, the clinking of the spoon scraping against the sides of the porcelain cup coming to a stop. “You know, you gotta stop sneaking into my room.” You teased before frowning, seeing the expression that sat on his face. “What’s wrong?” You got up from the chair, setting your cup down on the table before walking over to him.
“The Wakandans will…….be here for me tomorrow.” His eyes were lowered to the floor, the browns of his irises which reminded you of the dunes of the Sahara desert were whirling in thought, resembling the dunes caught in the midst of the fury of a sandstorm, as if searching for an answer to his troubles.
“Ze-Helmut, I………” You sighed, your tongue and mind lacking the ability to compose any words that might have provided some solace. “I’m sorry………..I don’t know what to say.”
“Y/n, schatzi” Zemo grabbed your hand, tracing his thumb over the bumps of your knuckles. “You don’t have to say a word. My actions………must be accounted for.”
You were silent, your brows knit together and your lips sealed as if your voice was ripped from your throat. Your heart wanted to tear itself from your chest, begging to be released from its cage so that it could be free to lament, so that it may be able to express the words that held it captive. But your tongue was tied, held back between the prison that was your teeth as you clenched your jaw. Zemo’s hand still held yours, stroking the soft skin on the back of your hand which were a contrast to the small rough patches on your palm, before you heard him speak again. “Can I kiss you?”
You blinked at him, lips parted in surprise that he would even ask such a question when you were honestly willing to kiss him any time of the day. The Zemo you had come to know was far different than the one you had heard about, his cold demeanor seemed to completely fade when he was around you, like a fog that dissipated with the coming of daylight. A part of you pondered whether this was how he used to be, before the events that happened. Though he hadn’t had a chance to share such affection with anyone and lost practice, you still found him to be great kisser and it always managed to leave you breathless. “Yes, please.” You whispered, your voice barely audible before you felt his lips brush against yours. What was sweet at first became more feverish and filled with hunger as an unfamiliar spirit seemed to possess your body, darkening the amethysts and golds of your eyes that resembled the galaxies, into the blackness of the abyss that swallowed the outer edges of space where not even the slightest bit of light could reach, almost as if you were sinking your claws into your prey.
A heat pooled in the pit of your stomach, filling your body with an electrifying warmth as his mouth moved against yours more confidently this time, catching you utterly by surprise and leaving your knees weak, a feeling similar to the stillness in the air a mere second before lightning strikes the ground beneath your feet. His hands slipped down to grab the flesh of your waist, dehydrated, and filled with an intense thirst that could only be quenched by your body that was the ocean, your skin separated by the silk fabric of your nightgown. Your hands went up to grip his shoulders as a gasp escaped your lips upon feeling him move down to your jaw and neck. Gods, since when was the last time you were touched like that?
“Helmut.” You rasped, struggling to hold back a moan as his lips sucked on the skin where your collarbone met your neck, making you lean your head back to allow him better access. Your robe had fell to the floor, leaving your arms completely bare while Zemo’s hands caressed the skin that lined them before resting on the dorsal part of your upper arms, the combination of the frigid air and his fingertips that felt like the touch of fire sending shivers through your body. “What if they hear?”
“Well if you’re that worried Draga.” Zemo stopped to look at you. “The walls are thick enough.”
Gods that completely sent you over the edge. It felt as if you were on a high, your mind was not even within this dimension as Zemo met your lips again. You had to throw your arms around his neck to keep yourself from collapsing as the two of you shifted in the room, Zemo guiding your body before the back of your knees came in contact with the side of your bed. You let yourself fall back into the soft mattress, bringing Zemo down with you. You both were a mess, your hair disarray, the thin straps of your nightgown fallen past your shoulders had almost left your breasts exposed, and the skirt of your nightgown had ridden up to your thighs as you wrapped your legs around his waist. Zemo squeezed at the soft flesh of your thigh before attacking your neck again. He didn’t know how to describe it but you tasted absolutely divine. Perhaps being a goddess made you taste of ambrosia; the golden, honey-flavored fruit that grew on the trees of Olympus. You were in absolute bliss and thanked the gods he wouldn’t be able to leave a mark, at least you hoped not.
“Helmut.” You moaned, your nails digging into his biceps as his warm lips made a trail down your collarbone and lower to where the lace trim of your nightgown met just above the curve of your breasts, lingering on the space between, filling your mind with thoughts of a certain region you desired those lips to be. “Fuck.” You hissed from the contact, your hand moving its way to his head as you ran your fingers through his soft hair, your nails raking across the back of his scalp as the heat between your thighs only grew. You unconsciously pressed your heel to the lower part of his back, beckoning him closer to that heat between your thighs as you bucked your hips up. Zemo growled at the movement, slightly nipping at the skin where your breast had started to form, causing you to gasp and your eyes to fly open from the sensation.
“Apologies draga.” You heard him mutter before tenderly kissing the spot where his teeth had been.
Seeing Zemo in a close proximity above you in such a position had you dazed, wanting him to take you right then and there and not caring if the others heard you or not. And as your eyes wandered lazily over the sight of him, they widened in horror once they glimpsed at the image of your hands. Your nails became sharp, claw-like, and that deathly color had returned once again, slowly making its way up your arm like the tendrils of a shadow belonging to a demonic spirit.
“Helmut.” You whispered, your voice becoming panicked as you loosened your grip on his arms, being careful not to pierce his skin. “Helmut wait.”
Zemo stopped, pushing himself up to meet your eyes as his concern grew from seeing the frightened look that filled them. “Schatzi, what’s wrong?” He brought his hand up to your face, brushing away the strands of your hair. “If you’re uncomfortable let me know.”
“No, gods no. If anything I don’t want you to stop.” You breathed out, trying to catch your breath. “It’s just that………….”
“What is it schatzi?” His voice was soft as his fingers caressed your cheek, afraid that he might have offended you in some way, afraid that he might have been too forward.
“I’m sorry Helmut. I want to, I really do, but not like this.” You shook your head as you got up, shifting over to where the dark shadows of the room fell on the bed to hide your arms, afraid to meet his eyes as if you had made a fool of yourself. “Not like this.”
“You don’t have to apologize to me y/n.” Zemo smiled at you. “If you’re not ready, than I’m not ready.”
“Thank you Helmut.” You smiled back before giving him a delicate kiss. “I’d………uh like to think some things through.” You prayed that he didn’t see your hands, hoping that the darkness of the room managed to disguise it.
“Of course draga.” Zemo placed a lingering kiss on your forehead before leaving your room, stopping at the door to give you a comforting smile as he carefully shut it behind him.
Your eyes still lingered on the door, waiting to make sure he didn’t come back before turning on the bedside lamp and staring down at your hands. You had managed to stop the color from spreading up your arm, yet it strangely still remained, stopping halfway up your forearm. This wasn’t good.
“What the hell?” You scrunched your nose, trying to use your powers once again to remove it but to no avail. Fear coursed through your veins as you attempted to remove the color, spell after spell, hoping those vine like tendrils would crawl back down your hands and disappear. You cursed under your breath as each attempt proved to be as futile as the one before. What the hell was going on? Why were your spells not working? It vanished before from your magic, why wasn’t it doing so now? You were struck with a sudden realization that perhaps this change would become permanent, that maybe suppressing your true form for all those years had caused it to spiral out of control and in turn try to overpower you as if it had a mind of its own. You growled through gritted teeth, the furniture around you shaking as your fists were clenched in frustration, the violet mists of your powers encompassing your hands and sparking with small bolts that corresponded with the vexation that overwhelmed you.
You closed your eyes and took a deep breath, the mist around your hands disappearing and the shaking of the furniture coming to a stop. You had to work something out. You were left no choice but to keep your hands covered from now on until you found a solution. If any of them questioned it, you had to have a damn good lie. Getting up from the bed, you walked over to the double doors that led to the small balcony and opened them, your hands gripping the cold iron rail as you stared out at the view of the Latvian streets and buildings before you. Oh how you wished your sister Athena were here. She knew everything.
“Oh Athena.” You stifled a sob as you stared up at the stars, focusing on the light of your planet as if she could have heard you, a tear cascading down your cheek and dropping to the streets below. “Gods I wish you were here. I really need your help.”
Despite your pleas, you knew she wasn’t there, her existence only an artifact of the past. You were praying to nothing but a memory. It was extremely urgent that you got information on this matter of your form and the words of the prophecy that still threatened and echoed within the depths of your mind. And since you couldn’t obtain such knowledge from another Olympian, you would have to gather it from the old texts. Muttering a few words in Ancient Greek, you waited, searching, until a small white moth came into view, fluttering in your direction. You held out your finger, letting the tiny creature come to rest upon it.
“Hello little one.” You smiled at the moth as you gently stroked it in greeting, bringing it closer to your face so that you could speak to it in your language. “Please send word to my familiar and tell him to gather as much information he can on Titans and the prophecy. And tell him to come find me when he is done. Thank you.” The moth looked at you with understanding behind his tiny black eyes, it’s antennaes twitching before fluttering away into the moon. You sighed, watching it disappear into the night before giving your distant planet one last glance before shutting the doors and going back over to the bed. You laid down under the covers, your hands rested on your stomach as you stared up at the ceiling, dreading the day to come. How could you face Zemo? And however were you going to keep your hands a secret? Surely the three are bound to find out sooner or later? You just prayed that the message you sent would be returned in a short time. You needed to fix this before it would be considered too late. And the sooner you found Karli the better. Your mind was racing with thoughts, but you closed your eyes, desperate to get some rest and forcing those thoughts away. Gods help you from this moment on.
Tag List: @girl-obsessed-with-things @aerynchromie @sunshinepower17 @viviace @kakimakiloh @thehornyles @awhorewithissues @gambitsqueen @spookycereal-s @lulu-yuming @mochminnie @Gabitanaka47 @s00nhi @vanteguccir @tomhollandsslilslut @dracoxxyoflam @suchababie @uhhhcrypticbastard @on-my-way-to-erebor @thewinterrbucky @mylifeispainandiloveit @fillechatoyante @padmoonyfeorge @montypythonsholysnail @pollynx @aziraslowlylosestheirshit @roundbrownlover @awesomeowlbook @bookloverfilmoholic @hargreevesd @death-is-beautiful @ilovespideyyy @peakyrogers
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25 part Bucky Barnes x f! reader (Y/N) action, slow burn.
Post End-game era Bucky Barnes and Sam Wilson are working together with S.H.I.E.L.D. to help make the world a better place. One night they are working to stop a human trafficking ring and they discover a woman with some abilities and a history they have to uncover together.
Broken Dreams- in progress
5 part mini series, Bucky Barnes x f!reader (Y/N) angst with some action
Y/N is a top notch agent that left SHIELD years ago on not so great of terms. Now she is forced to go back and face the past, including a blue-eyed someone she used to call her best friend.
Mood board by @killsandthrills
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Broken Dreams Masterlist
(If this is your art, please let me know, I’d love to give credit)
A five part mini series I needed to get off my chest
Summary- Y/N is a top notch agent that left SHIELD years ago on not so great of terms. Now she is forced to go back and face the past, including a blue-eyed someone she used to call her best friend.
Bucky Barnes x f!reader (Y/N)
Warnings- language, canon typical violence, agnst
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Pairing- Bucky Barnes x F! reader (Y/N)
Word Count- 3197
Warnings- canon typical violence, angst, hospitals, language
Summary- Y/N is a top notch agent that left SHIELD years ago on not so great of terms. Now she is forced to go back and face the past, including a blue-eyed someone she used to call her best friend.
A/N- Here’s an angsty little something I cooked up to vent. Based loosely on some real life issue and events. I truly wrote this for myself to help deal with things. It’s a five part mini series.
Let me know if you’d like to be added to the tags
Part 2- 2015
The countless assignments, hours of training, and extra caseload you had volunteered for were finally paying off. Here you were. An official SHIELD agent getting ready for weapons training by the Avengers.
As long as you can remember, you’ve wanted nothing more than to be an agent for SHIELD. The thrill of working on missions, the chance to work alongside the Avengers, the pressure of having people’s lives in your hands- it all sounded amazing.
You were waiting for instruction to begin in the middle of a gymnasium. Anxious to see what new impressive techniques you would learn, you started fiddling with the hem of your shirt. Right as you felt your excitement couldn’t be contained anymore, Natasha Romanoff walked into the room.
“Good morning everyone,” she greeted the small class of ten you were a part of.
“Good morning,” everyone repeated back in unison.
“Since you all know how to use a weapon at this point, I’m going to teach you some unconventional methods that you won’t find in any academy,” Natasha explained. “For starters, when your gun runs out of bullets, don’t discard it. It’s metal and it’s going to hurt a lot more than a fist will when hitting someone.”
She then proceeded to show you the various points that would cause the greatest amount of damage on an enemy with various weapons.
After several hours of unique weapons training, you were ushered to an onboarding orientation for new agents. The presentation was held in a large room, which was occupied with several other new field units and various other new hires.
Taking a seat on the outskirts of the room, you reached down into your bag to grab a pen and paper for notes and saw in your periphery someone sit next to you. Straightening again in your chair, you turned to your left to see none other than the infamous Bucky Barnes.
You had heard stories about the Winter Soldier. How effective he was as an assassin and how intimidating he was in person. Sitting there with him right next to you, you understood. While he certainly wasn’t the biggest man you had ever encountered, he had a large presence and a fearsome aura that permeated from him.
Catching your glance, he turned to face you then looked down at the pen and paper in your hands.
“Do they really expect us to take notes on this?” he asked.
“I-I don’t know. Probably not, but I’d rather have it ready,” you explained now feeling a little embarrassed at your over eager nature. You always had been extra prepared and a bit of an overachiever.
“I’m not judging you. I just don’t like these sort of things,” he offered as he gestured towards the screen at the front that showed the opening slide labeled “Working as a Team- building a brighter future for SHIELD together”.
“I mean, who believes this bullshit anyway?” He scoffed.
“You don’t think working as a team is important?” you quizzed.
“I do. But some rah rah presentation put on by a suit isn’t going to help anyone out in the field. That just comes with time and working together,” he answered. “I’m Bucky by the way,”
“Y/N,” you said as you offered your hand out for a formal shake, which he returned.
“So, Bucky. I’ve got to ask. Why are you here? No offense, but I thought this was for new hires only. And you’re. . .you,” you asked.
“Technically I am a new hire for SHIELD. And I think given my history they’re trying to send a message. Plus, I’m pretty sure Fury is still pissed about my almost killing him and this is some sort of punishment.”
He then proceeded to pull out a bag of baby carrots from seemingly nowhere and eat. “Want one?” he asked, holding up the bag while holding a carrot between his teeth.
“Good afternoon everyone, let’s get started. My name is Gwen and I’m going to walk you through today’s topic of team building,” a bright eyed, blonde woman spoke at the front of the room.
As she continued on in her speech, you listened as Bucky made scoffing noises every time she brought up the importance of emotional intimacy with your teammates or how there was no “I” in team.
Finally, after her lecture about building trust, you got a nudge on your elbow and turned to see Bucky handing you a note. Opening the small piece of paper, which turned out to be a gum wrapper, you read the message.
How far do you think I’d have to shove this carrot up my nose to get out of this?
You craned your head to see Bucky with a baby carrot held at the entrance of his right nostril and his eyebrows raised. A burst of laughter escaped your mouth, which you immediately tried to hide with a cough.
Gwen, the lecturer, paused her talk and turned her attention to you. “Is everything ok? Do you need some water?”
“I’m fine. Just had a little carrot caught in my throat. Sorry about that,” you apologized.
Satisfied that she could continue uninterrupted, Gwen proceeded to discuss various team building exercises. You, however, took the opportunity to turn and glare at Bucky to which he simply grinned back at you and shrugged nonchalantly as he bit into another carrot.
An hour and half later, the lecture ended. As you packed your unused pen and paper back into your bag, you heard Bucky grumble, “Lectures like that make me wish my mind was still scrambled.”
“Aw c'mon. Poor Gwen really gave it her all up there,” you smiled at him as you both stood up and started walking towards the exit.
“Maybe that’s it though. She was trying too hard. You can’t force a team to work well together. Sometimes people click and other times they don’t. You know?” He explained.
“Yeah, I get what you’re saying. But I don’t get to pick the other members in my unit. And I have to trust them with my life,” you countered.
“Good point. I guess it’s just better when you find those people that get you. You know?” He clarified.
“Anyway, where are you off to next?” He asked, looking sideways at you.
“To the gym. You?”
“Assassin stuff,” he deadpanned in reply to which you had an inquisitive look in return.
“Ok, Former assassin stuff. I need to go see my shrink,” he admitted.
“I had heard that’s part of the deal with the pardon they granted you,” you told him.
“So you do know my history?” he asked.
“Of course I do. Who wouldn’t know that here. You’re kind of a walking legend.”
Suddenly he stopped and turned to face you. “So what exactly do you know of my legend?” He asked.
“The full story?” you clarified.
“Ok, you’re James Buchanan Barnes born 1917. Fought in World War 2 where you were first captured by Hydra and then rescued by your best friend Steve Rogers aka Captain America. From there you continued fighting in the war and taking out Hydra bases as part of the howling commandos. On one particular mission you fell from a train and everybody assumed you had died. In actuality you had survived the fall thanks to the super serum Hydra had injected you with.
Then over the next several decades Hydra experimented with you and gave you your first metal arm. They turned you into the first Winter Soldier as part of their super soldier program. You escaped Hydra's grasp a few years ago after Helmut Zemo tried to frame you for bombing the Vienna convention and killing king T’Chaka.
There you went to Wakanda where they erased your trigger words making it so you could no longer become the Winter Soldier. You got a new arm and have now joined the Avengers,” you concluded. “Did I miss anything?”
“No, I think that’s all the major events. Aside from stuff I did under Hydra,” he muttered.
“I’ve read a lot of that too. Figured it would be impolite to bring it up.”
Looking over at him, you could see the shame that still surrounded his memories of that time and the actions he participated in. After blinking a few times he looked back at you.
“I gotta run. It was nice meeting you,” he grinned.
“Nice meeting you too. Maybe I’ll see you around,” you said and then turned to start in the direction of the gym. After taking a few steps you suddenly heard Bucky call out after you.
“Hey, Y/N. . . thank you.”
“For what?” you asked, truly baffled at the sudden gratitude.
“Treating me like a person. Lots of people that know who I am are afraid or act weird around me. So. . .thanks.”
“You’re welcome,” you responded.
The arrangements for your mother to be moved to the medical bay at the Avengers tower happened within a day of your agreement. She immediately started improvements in speech, mobility, and clarity of her surroundings. Bruce Banner himself was the main attendant on her case, ensuring that she was receiving the best treatment possible.
Your return to the tower happened a week later. After packing your suitcases at your hotel room and returning the minivan to your brother, you waited outside your Starbucks for your ride. Standing at the curb, you saw a large, black SUV pull into the lot and drive in your direction.
The vehicle stopped right in front of you, but due to the tinted windows, you were unable to view the driver. Grabbing your bags, you went towards the rear of the vehicle where you were greeted by Sam Wilson.
“Ha-haaa, they really did get you back! Man it’s good to see your face,” he smiled widely and grabbed you in a bear hug. In spite of yourself, you returned the embrace as Sam was one of the few people that had remained a good friend and neutral throughout all the chaos of your departure.
“Hi Cap,” you muttered into his chest. “I’m only doing this for you,” you winked when you pulled back from him.
“Well, let’s get on the road and catch up,” he stated while grabbing your bags and lifting them into the back of the vehicle.
The ride to the tower was comfortable as you and Sam conversed easily about events of the past five years and happenings with the Avengers. Thor was still somewhere in space, Banner was happily living as his green self full time, Parker got his driver's license, Fury was still Fury, Wanda had gone MIA since taking a town hostage, Clint had a new protégé, and Scott was still a lovable dork.
It wasn’t lost on you that he failed to mention anything about Bucky and his rise through the ranks. You knew he had attained some high up position and title, but you tried your best to ignore it.
When you finally arrived at the tower, you felt a rush of nerves in your stomachs tighten. This was a mistake, you should back out now. You could surely come up with some plan for employment. But then you reminded yourself that this was for your mom. She needed and deserved the best care, and you had the ability to provide that if you swallowed your pride and played nice with everyone here.
Well, not everyone.
Once parked inside the garage, Sam called some interns that happened to be nearby to carry your bags to your room in the main dormitory wing. Sam then escorted you to your new office which was spacious and adorned with a large desk in the center, floor to ceiling windows on the western side, and comfortable seating for at least six others.
“Fury wants to get you up and running as soon as possible, but I thought we could squeeze in a visit to your mom first,” Sam offered.
“Thank you,” you grinned back at him and followed him down the hall.
You had never set foot in the new rendition of the Avengers tower, but found the layout quite comprehensive and intuitive. The medical wing sat on the western edge of the complex, close to the air hanger for easy access should an injury need immediate medical attention.
Your mother’s room was a large suite at the end of the hall. Much like your office, it had floor to ceiling windows on one side allowing natural light. It was decorated like a regular bedroom rather than a sterile hospital room with nice curtains, a wooden table with chairs, and a comfy looking recliner in the far corner.
Approaching the bed, you gently grabbed your mom's hand and greeted her, “Hi mom. How are you feeling today? They treating you good here?”
She opened her eyes and blinked in recognition as she was still unable to smile properly. “Hi honey,” she mumbled.
“I’m moving in today, so I’ll just be down the hall from you now on. No more hotel rooms. Ok?” You explained and you saw your mom look past you at Sam.
“Mom, you remember Sam. Captain America . You used to get nervous watching him fly on tv,” you giggled.
“Hi Ms. Y/L/N, it’s good to see you again,” Sam spoke softly, addressing your mom.
“Listen, I can’t stay long. I’ve got a lot to cover today, but I’ll stop by again later and we can catch up,” you explained as you leaned down to give her a gentle kiss on the forehead.
“K,” she croaked out and gave your hand a small squeeze.
Leaving the room, you felt better about the entire ordeal. Your mom's face looked a thousand better than it had in the hospital, full of color and life. That she was able to squeeze your hand was truly a miracle. Smiling, you walked down the hallway behind Sam with a newfound resilience and reason for being here.
Sam then toured you around various other parts of the complex including the armory, the training area, R&D, and meeting areas. He introduced you to a slew of new faces, many of whom seemed excited at the chance to meet the famous Y/N.
“Next on your agenda is a briefing,” Sam told you as you turned a corner.
“Alright, who’s involved in that one?” You asked, starting to feel a bit tired from all the touring and introductions.
He didn’t answer.
“Sam, who’s involved in this briefing?” You asked more accusatively.
“Well. . . Here’s the thing—“
“What the shit,” you deflated knowing full well what it meant.
“Y/N, he works here too and you knew it would be a part of the job,” he reminded you.
“Yeah, but on the very first day?” you whined.
“He’s kind of the director of operations now, so yeah. You do need to see him,” Sam argued.
“I don’t care if he’s God, I’d really rather not,” you begged as he reached for the handle to a door and opened it. “Sam please, wait. . .”
Inside was a room much smaller and darker than your office. The cramped workspace only had one tiny window and dark colored walls. Neat piles of paperwork and a laptop were spread out on a table that was being used as a desk. There was a metal fold up chair pushed back from it. Lining the walls was a showcase of various weapons, which you were sure weren’t just for display.
Bucky was nowhere to be seen though.
“Well, guess he’s not here. Too bad. Moving on,” you spoke in quick succession as you turned to leave.
“He’s on his way now, he had a meeting run late,” Sam explained.
“And what about you? Don’t you have some meetings to attend with your executive title these days? What about your office?” You inquired.
“Yeah I have meetings, but my role is more political. Not tactical. And I sure as shit wouldn’t be caught dead in this dungeon he calls an office.”
“Look, you two are going to have to work together. And technically speaking he will be your boss,” Sam told you.
“Wait, what?! Nobody informed me of this. Deal is off. I —“
“What deal?” Bucky interjected as he approached you from behind. “Sorry I’m late.”
“The deal where I got swindled into working here,” you proclaimed.
“How did you get swindled? You agreed to this,” Bucky stated.
“No one told me I’d have to work directly with you,” you said exasperated.
“You won’t be. I mean, yes, I’ll be In charge but I’ll leave you alone. I trust your ability and judgement,” he spoke assuringly.
“Sure, just like you did in the old days. So much trust,” you shot back.
“I’m going to go and let you two hash this out. Just please. . . No weapons against each other,” Sam pleaded as he turned and walked away.
“Can we sit down and talk about this?” Bucky pleaded. “Please?”
Giving his dark office a once over, you asked, “Do you even have two chairs in there?”
He chuckled in response then made an exaggerated gesture for you to enter. Once inside he closed the door behind you. Bucky then walked over to a closet where he pulled out another fold out chair, opened it for you, then strolled over to his own seat.
A brief moment passed where you two stared at each other, daring the other to speak first. Finally, Bucky broke the silence.
“Look, I know this is hard for you. I understand I’m still somewhere on the top ten of your shit list.”
“Top five,” you corrected.
Sighing, he continued, “My point is, I do trust you. I always have. In spite of whatever happened in the past, you were always my go to-“
“Just let me finish,” he cut off your snide rebuttal. “This place has not been the same without you. Sure we keep going and making advances and improvements. But not like when you were here. When we worked together. I’d like to try to work together again, for the betterment of this organization and the world as a whole,” he finished.
“This director thing has really got you by the balls doesn’t it,” you deadpanned. “I still can’t believe you’re a director now.”
“That’s what happens when you stay,” he stated.
“No, that’s what happens when you stay,” you spoke bitterly.
“I’ve told you before, I’m sorry about what happened,” he said apologetically as he averted his eyes towards the ground.
You huffed in response, hating this situation and all the emotional baggage it brought to the forefront. “Apologies don’t change anything that happened.”
“I know. But. . . I’m trying now. Again. I need your help Y/N. You’re the best person for this job.”
“Just one thing I want to make very clear before we move any further,” you glared at him. “You and I are not friends.”
“Understood,” he mumbled.
“And you are not forgiven.”
“Got it. Anything else?” Bucky prodded.
“What’s the first assignment?” You asked as you sat back in your seat. “And when can I meet my team?”
Tags- @capmanranger @angstysebfan @maryosprinkle @stevetonycupcakes
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golden (you’re so golden)
summary // bucky is in louisiana with sam when he meets you, one of sam’s close friends, and immediately gets along with you. (bucky x fem!reader)
words // 3.5k
warnings // it’s fluff! some tiny insecure bucky but that’s about it. sam calls reader bubbles a couple times. use of y/n.
notes // 💞
》* 。 • ˚ ˚ ˛ ˚ ˛ • 。* 。° 。* 。 • ˚《
Bucky enjoyed Louisiana.
He enjoys being with Sam and his family in Louisiana. It’s slow and relaxed and everybody in town is so charming that he finds himself settling in easily.
There’s a level of trust Sam shows Bucky allowing him to help with the family boat and while he hadn’t said it, he did appreciate Sam’s unending kindness.
Perhaps Bucky has found the beginnings of a new home in Sam Wilson. A friendship based on respect and love helped Bucky. He was slowly but surely rebuilding himself into a better man.
“Word on the street is Sam Wilson was back in town.” A voice calls out from above the two men. Bucky looks at Sam and finds him smiling and shaking his head. There’s footsteps and then you’re standing in the doorway with a smirk. “I just had to see for myself.”
Sam lets go of the wrench in his hand and moves to meet you at the top of the stairs. Bucky watches curiously as Sam hugs you tightly. He had never mentioned a girlfriend, although Bucky wasn't particularly forthcoming about his personal life either.
“Hey, Bubbles.” Bucky scrunches his nose at the nickname and you roll your eyes and shove Sam off of you.
He laughs heartily clutching his stomach. “The nickname wasn’t funny in the seventh grade and it’s not funny now.”
Sam presses a kiss to your head and Bucky clears his throat. He feels like he’s interrupting a personal moment, but your smile is turned on him and then Bucky freezes because that’s a beautiful smile.
“Who’s your friend?” You nudge Sam with your elbow but your stare doesn’t waver. Bucky smiles nervously before lifting his hand up in an awkward wave.
“Bucky.” He introduces. You nod slowly. “Barnes.” He adds on and you laugh at him making Bucky deflate a little.
“Y/N.” You respond easily. “And don’t call me Bubbles, I hate it.” Your glare and he nods. “I just came to see if the rumors were true.” You shift your focus back to Sam. “I just couldn’t believe Sam Wilson was here, working on the boat, without telling me.”
Sam scratches the back of his neck awkwardly. “Wasn’t sure how long I was gonna be here.”
You purse your lips and Bucky thinks that wasn’t the right thing to say. He’s so curious about what your relationship is because he can’t tell if it’s just friends or dating or maybe even exes. You’re affectionate and comfortable with one another, that much is obvious in the few seconds Bucky has been able to observe.
“Even if you were here for a day, I would like to see you.” You punch his shoulder. “But whatever, I’m not gonna hold a grudge.”
There’s a moment of silence between the three of you before you shrug. “I’ve gotta go. I’ll see you tonight, Sarah invited me for dinner.”
You give a quick hug to Sam before waving goodbye Bucky. He waves back with a smile and watches as you walk away.
He doesn’t even realize Sam’s staring at him until the man clears his throat. Bucky shuffles and adamantly ignores the fire he feels burning at his cheeks. “Who’s that?” He asks in a faux nonchalant tone.
Sam shakes his head and laughs. “We grew up together. Went to prom and all that.” Bucky nods and tries to think of how to ask his next question, but Sam beats him to it. “Not as my girlfriend or anything. She’s like a bonus sister.”
Bucky nods and looks back down at the pipe they had been working on. “Cool… We gonna finish this?”
Sam snorts, but Bucky can hear his footsteps come back down the stairs. “Let’s get it done. I just know Sarah’s gonna make something great for dinner if Y/N’s coming and I’m starving.”
Bucky nods, excited for some home cooked food. And maybe seeing more of your smile.
Bucky sits next to you at dinner. The kids across from the two of you with Sam and Sarah at the ends of the table.
He notices your eyes trail over the black and gold of his arm and tries to not to blush. “How’d this happen?” You nod to it after a moment of silence.
Bucky turns to you at the same moment Sam’s head shoots up to look at you. “Bubbles.” He hisses your nickname like you’re a child with their hand in the cookie jar.
“Sam.” You hiss back, eyes narrowed at the nickname. Bucky wonders if Sam would ever call you by your first name. “It’s okay.” He nods to Sam.
Bucky is sure that the kids sitting across from him had been wondering too, if Sam hadn’t already told them. He takes a sip of his beer before deciding on sharing a condensed version
“Lost it when I fell off a train in 1945.” He shrugs. You look him up and down. “Got this arm a few years ago.”
It’s silent as you process his words and your eyes move back to stare at the arm. His fingers twitch and your eyes snap to them.
“You don’t look like you fell off a train in 1945. You don’t even look forty.” You say skeptically. Sam runs a hand over his face while the kids laugh.
“Just eat.” Sam orders. “You don’t need to ask him all these questions. It’s rude.”
You turn to your food and roll your eyes at Sam. “I asked one question.” Then your eyes move to Bucky again and you smile apologetically. “I wasn’t trying to make you uncomfortable though. I’m sorry.”
He shakes his head. “It’s cool. You can just google me for all the answers anyways. I’m pretty sure the Smithsonian has a webpage on me.”
You snort. “That’s a subtle brag.”
Bucky feels his cheeks flush and shakes his head. “No. I just meant… like, Howling Commandos and Steve-“
“She’s just messing with you, man.” Sam laughs as he reaches across the table for a biscuit. “She knows who you are.”
Bucky looks back at you and finds the teasing smile on your face. He flushes red and that only makes you laugh too. Bucky presses his lips together and nods slowly. “Nice.”
“Hey.” You nudge him with your elbow. “If it helps, I think you look pretty good for someone who fell off of a train, lost an arm, was brainwashed for decades and then fought an army of Titans.”
Sam’s shaking his head and Sarah is just staring at you with wide eyes, but Bucky’s lips quark up as he tries not to laugh. “Thanks.” His eyes move over you. “You look pretty good for someone who’s friends with Sam.”
“Hey!” Sam cuts in defensively. “You know, most people think I’m cool.” You and Bucky smirk at each other before both turning to Sam with open mouths, ready to tease him. “Nevermind.”
Bucky can’t help but watch as you throw your head back and let out one of the most beautiful laughs he’s ever heard.
“Boys!” You call from the dock with a bright smile. Bucky spins so fast he thinks he’s got whiplash until he sees your happy face. You’ve got your sunglasses hooked in the collar of your t-shirt and a tray of iced coffees in your hands. “I know I’m late, but I come with some refreshments.”
Sam scoffs from next to Bucky. “Coffee isn’t really all that good for rehydration.”
Your smile drops for a millisecond before you turn your attention to Bucky. He gestures awkwardly for a moment before his right hand lands on his hip and his left hand waves. “I like coffee.” He blurts.
You bite down a smile as Bucky ignores the blush he knows is on his cheeks. Maybe it’ll just pass off as a sunburn, or heat exhaustion.
“See, Sam.” You smile victoriously. “Bucky appreciates my gifts.”
Sam scoffs and Bucky just stares at you avoiding Sam’s glare. “He won’t when he tastes the sugar monstrosity you’ve probably brought him.”
You pout and step closer to the boat. You shakily try to step onto deck, but stumble at the last minute. Bucky’s hands shoot out to steady your waist and you look at him with a shy smile and grateful eyes.
“Thank you, Bucky.” You say softly as he helps you step onto the boat deck steadily. “I didn’t know what you liked, so I got you what I drink.”
You lift one of the iced drinks out of the carrier. Sam was right, it looks like a sugared disaster, more cream than coffee; Bucky has to force himself not to scrunch his nose up at the drink.
“Thank you.” Bucky takes the coffee from you and stares down at it. You hand one over to Sam and then finally pull your own out.
“If...If you don’t like it, don’t even worry.” You say as the three of you move back to the part of the deck the boys had been working on all morning.
Bucky takes a sip and well, it’s not awful. Nor is it even that bad. Definitely more sugar than he was used to, but he needed to get out of his comfort zone anyways.
“I like it.” He states. “I’d like anything you give me.” He smirks as you look down at your feet nervously. “You’ll have to tell me what you order so I know.”
Your smile brightens and you nod excitedly, pulling your phone out. “Give me your number, I’ll text it to you.”
“You can just write it down.” Sam says with a teasing smirk when Bucky looks up and glares over your shoulder. “I mean-“
“Ignore him.” You roll your eyes and hold the phone out, the contact page already cued up. As Bucky takes the phone and begins to type his number in, you spin around to face Sam. “I’m trying to make friends here, Wilson. Stop trying to discourage it because you’re afraid he and I could lead to world destruction together.”
Sam laughs loudly and Bucky hands the phone back to you. “I’m not worried about the world as much, I'm worried about me. I can already tell you two will be a pain in my ass together.”
You glance at Bucky and wink before slipping the phone back into your pocket. “Stop stalling Sam, we’ve got work to do.” You scoff as you begin to pull out tools.
Bucky looks at Sam with a smirk. “Yeah, Sam. We’re trying to get some work done while you’re just standing there.” Bucky sturdies the piece you had begun screwing in with his left hand.
Sam sighs and returns to his earlier position. “I’m so glad you two have met.” He mutters sarcastically.
The shield slips onto Bucky’s arm easily. “Looking good!” You wolf whistle as you make your way towards the boys in Sarah’s yard.
Sam rolls his eyes, but Bucky puffs his chest out a little and smiles. “Hey!” He says as you come to a stop in front of them.
Bucky’s eyes trail over your figure. “Hey. I heard you were leaving today.” Your attention is solely on Bucky as Sam stands beside him with a knowing smile.
He nods apologetically. “I’ve got some stuff to do back home in Brooklyn. I uh-“ He looks down at his boots. “You have my number. I would love to keep in touch.”
You bite down on your lip as you nod. “Of course! Anybody who can handle Sam is someone I want in my life.”
“Are you two just gonna make fun of me everytime you’re together? Because I’ll cut this off right now.” He says jokingly.
You rock back and forth on your feet nervously before finally talking. “I’ll let you two get back to it. I just wanted to say bye!” You pull Sam into a tight hug before turning to Bucky. “Um, I’ll see you later. I hope?”
He nods enthusiastically. “Yeah! Yeah, I mean. I hope so too.” He stands awkwardly in front of you, unsure of if he should hug you or just settle for a handshake.
Your hands land on his shoulders as you lift yourself onto your tippy toes and press a kiss to his cheek. His cheeks are burning red by the time you pull away and wonders if you’re as nervous as he is. “I’ll see you around, Bucky.” You say sweetly before spinning on your heel and walking off.
Bucky watches you go with soft eyes as Sam just stares at him incredulously.
Bucky doesn’t get to see much of you the next couple weeks, but he hears from you all the time. Text messages telling him to have a good day. Photos of animals you see around your hometown. Photos of you and your family or friends.
It always makes his day and you never seem to mind if it takes him a long time to reply.
“You gonna come down?” Sam asks as he and Bucky walk through the empty streets of Brooklyn. “Y/N has been asking about you. When you’ll be in Louisiana again.”
Bucky shrugs. “I don’t know. I... I might stay up here.” Bucky answers quietly. He wanted to see you. You had easily become one of his favorite people to talk to, even if you had barely seen each other in person.
Sam snorts. “Come on. The boys want to see you. Sarah. We all loved having you around.” He bumps his shoulder into Bucky’s.
“I won’t be intruding?” Bucky asks softly.
Sam shakes his head. “You know that you won’t, Bucky. I’m not gonna force your hand, but I know she would like to see you as much as you would her.”
“Really?” Bucky tries not to sound too excited by the idea of you asking Sam about Bucky and when he’d be back in Louisiana.
Sam rolls his eyes. “Yeah. She asks about you. Just… Come down for a few days?”
Bucky nods slowly. “Yeah… Okay. I will.”
The dock is packed with people. Bucky smiles at the laughter and cheerful screams of the people around him. Crowds weren’t normally his thing, but this town of people loved each other so much he couldn't help but relish in the warmth.
“Bucky! Bucky!” He slips his sunglasses off as Sam’s nephews come rushing towards him excitedly. They throw fake punches and kicks that Bucky dodges before they lead him to the food table.
He places his cake on the edge and stops to look around. He knows he’s searching for you, but he can at least try to be as nonchalant as possible about it.
“You went all out for your dish, huh?” Your voice makes him spin around. You’re behind him with crossed arms and an amused smile on your face. The sun is casting such a beautiful light over you that Bucky is speechless for a moment.
Bucky shrugs. “I didn’t… I’m not much of a chef and I didn’t want to come empty handed.” He explains sheepishly.
You shake your head before moving forward and wrapping your arms around his neck. Bucky immediately responds and wraps his arms around you tightly.
“I’m so happy you came down again.” You whisper to him and pull back to look at him. He smiles sweetly at you. “Me too. It’s nice to see you again.”
You pull completely away, but slide your arm through his and begin to walk with him. “Come meet everyone. I’ve been talking about you non-stop, everyone is so excited to meet you.”
You pull him around and introduce him to friends and family. Your arm never leaves his and that makes Bucky feel extremely warm on the inside. He’s positive he’s going to melt by the time you’re pulling him towards the food.
“Hey!” Sam is the last person you and Bucky find. He’s sitting with Sarah and his nephews as they all eat. “Sit! I’m sure you’re tired of introducing your boyfriend to everyone.”
You and Bucky look away from each other nervously as you take your seats. “Shut up, Sam.” You hiss as you take your seat next to him.
Sam rolls his eyes as he hands over food to you and Bucky. It’s not awkward, but everytime you and Bucky make eye contact he feels his cheeks get warm and you look away with a nervous smile.
“I should head out.” You finally say, picking up the plate in front of you to throw it away on your way out. “Thanks for all this, Sam. Sarah. It was so great to see everyone again.” They nod with bright smiles and your attention focuses on Bucky. “Will you be staying for a while?”
He shrugs, unsure of what to say. “I…I think so. Yeah.” You nod slowly and stand in front of him for a moment like you’re waiting for something before sighing. “Well, I’ll see you later.” You wave before turning and beginning to walk away.
Bucky watches you for a few seconds before turning back to look at the table. Everybody is staring at him with poorly concealed smirks.
“What?” He asks defensively. He takes a sip of his water and they continue to just stare. “Stop staring at me. It’s weird.”
“You better go after her!” Sam shoves his shoulder which makes Bucky choke a little on the water. “She just waited for you to walk her home!”
Bucky begins shaking his head vehemently. “No. No way! She was saying goodbye. To all of us.”
“Don’t be an idiot, Bucky!” Sarah chimes in. “She likes you! She literally introduced you to everyone she cares about today!” There’s a chorus of yeahs from Sam and the boys that has Bucky glaring playfully at them.
“Really? She wanted me to walk her home?” He asks Sam quietly. Sam scoffs. “Yeah, man. So you better start hustling to catch up with her!”
“Shit!” He pushes himself off of the bench. “Okay! I’ll see you guys later!” He calls out with a hasty wave before jogging away from the table.
You can’t have made it far, but if you’ve already left the dock entirely there’s no way he’ll find you. He had no clue where you live or even what direction he would have to go in to find you.
He stops at the entrance of the dock and looks around while huffing out breaths. His eyes catch on your sundress and he smiles. “Y/N!” He calls out, jogging to catch up with you.
“Hey! Wait up!” You pause and turn around to face him. Your eyes light up but you don’t say anything to him as he comes to a stop beside you. “Let me walk you home?” He asks nervously.
Surprise crosses your features before an excited smile takes place. “Okay.” You say softly. “I would love that.” You wrap your hand around his bicep and step closer as the two of you begin to walk.
Bucky appreciates that you seem to be comfortable with talking because the entire twenty minute walk passes quickly with your stories and jokes. By the time the two of you have reached your front door Bucky is trying to come up with a reason to go around the block one more time.
“Thank you for walking me home, Buck.” You say quietly. You cross your arms over your stomach and run one hand up and down the opposite arm. Bucky smiles at you as you speak. “I had a nice time talking to you.”
Bucky stuffs his hands into his pockets and nods. “Me too. I enjoy talking to you. You’re a breath of fresh air.” He admits. It was nice to talk to somebody who wasn’t a part of his old life, who was completely new and who only knew this him, not Bucky from the forties or the winter soldier. Maybe his therapist had been right about needing to talk to more people.
You bite your lip and look off to the side before your eyes find his again. “Thank you. You’re really sweet.”
“Well, I’ll let you go.” Bucky takes a step back from you and your house. The two of you watch one another and Bucky knows he should say something. Ask you on a date. Tell you you’re pretty. He just can’t get the words out.
“Oh, Bucky.” You sigh as your hand wraps around his wrist and pulls him back into you. His left hand immediately lands on your waist in order to steady himself. Before he can apologize or pull it away, you’re leaning in and pressing a soft kiss to his lips.
He doesn’t respond, unable to with how quickly you lean in and pull away, but you’re smiling sweetly at him. “Ask me out.” You demand softly.
Bucky chuckles. “Do you… Would you want to go on a date with me?” He asks, still a little nervous.
“I would love to.” You wrap your arms around his neck and Bucky lifts his other hand to rest on your waist too. “I can take you to some of my favorite places around town.” You offer and Bucky nods quickly.
Bucky enjoyed Louisiana.
He thinks he may have finally found a home outside of Brooklyn, which was a once upon a memory. Somewhere clean of Steve and a life Bucky would never get back. Somewhere with Sam forging a bond of brotherhood and you building something new with him too.
》* 。 • ˚ ˚ ˛ ˚ ˛ • 。* 。° 。* 。 • ˚《
notes // i don’t know how some of you write only on your phones it stresses me out so much kudos to you lol hope you liked this short piece, keep an eye out for my other two requests this week!
reblogs and replies are always appreciated if you enjoyed this!
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Could you do a Bucky/Reader fic for 16 on the smut prompts?
The intimacy of shaving
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female Reader, Sam Wilson x Reader
Bucky Bingo Square: New haircut square
Characters: Bucky Barnes, Sam Wilson, Sarah Wilson
Setting: three months after the end of Falcon and the Winter Soldier
Rating: M (Mature), E (explicit), NSFW, +18 only please
Warnings: fluff, angst, bickering, smut, oral female receiving, yearning, pining, unrequited love, smutty dreams, broken bones, mention of torture, Bucky’s old memories,
Word count: 10,800
Summary: Frustrated with being left behind, worry taking hold after finding out just a fraction of how bad your boys are. Making you start to search your feeling's for both men. Especially with the intimacy of giving Bucky a hair cut and shave. Unexpected emotions surface on all parts.
Notes: Sequel too “My own worse enemy," filling in a bingo square for #buckybingo and also an Anon request asking for smut prompt #16 “I’m going to die if you don’t let me cum.” Hope you don't mind me adding Sam into the mix sweetie. Also for my head cannon Sam uses Delacroix LA for his base of operation. Wanting to help take care of his family while taking on the mantle of Captain America. Hope you enjoyed doll.
Tag list’s: Are open
Forever’s: @jedi-mando @chickensarentcheap
Bucky Barnes list: @learisa @eclipses-and-moondust
Story list: @sammyissassy @feelmyroarrrr
Wearing a path from the kitchen to living room ignoring Sarah’s stare, thumb nail damn near nibbled to the bed with how much your chewing the poor abused finger. Cell phone pressed to your ear, listening to Sams deep baritone, “What’d ya mean three places Samuel? How the f-ing hell did you both managed to get so banged up?”
“Explanations will roll out once we touch down Y/N for now know at least he didn’t break his funny bone that’s still none existence,” glancing towards Bucky stretched out over the metal helo bench. Right arm in a sling snug to his body, thick plaster cast covering from mid bicep to mid palm, fingers still visible.
“I heard that and I do to have a sense of humor just not your brand of stupid jokes bird brain,” deep voice unmistakably Bucky’s catching a wobble in the cadence not there when last they spoke.
Swiping a hand over your face wanting to kill them both for leaving you behind. Plans to do just that forming in your mind while snarking, “Remind me again why exactly you chose to leave me behind?”
Staying home you could’ve possibly worked with, the unknown danced on your nerves more than you’d give credit to. Having grown even closer to both men over the last six months, always brushing those pesky feelings and thoughts away that surface during weak moments of worry or sleep.
“To dangerous and I’m not arguing with you on those semantics it’s bad enough cyborg got the shit beaten out of him,” quickly pulling the phone from his ear at the high pitched sound from down the line. Forgetting a moment your attachment to both men, “You finished?”
Low growl in answer, biting off the curses you wish to fling at both Captain America and the Winter Soldier. “Don’t worry you’re in for it once you get home. ETA?” Checking the watch strapped to your left wrist, “I’ll come pick y’all up, gotta stop in town for supplies anyway.”
“No worries my trucks at base I’ll get Buck and myself home.” Glancing at his watch, “Landing in about two hours, think you can grab a couple of Miss Bridgette’s pecan pies?”
Too many years working with that man not to know what he likes, “For the shit you and Barnes pulled get your own pie man.” Soft chuckles lets you know Sarah heard you. Eyes locking with her’s for a moment seeing the worry in those warm browns matching as you knew in your own. “Just bring you asses home so Sarah and I can roast them.”
Almost feeling the deep groan from over the phone line, “What did you tell her?”
“Nothing since that’s what I got,” shaking head tips to the side picking up on Sam’s easy breathing and the helo’s engines in the back ground. “Just get home dumbass,” affection in your tone. Ending the call, slipping the cell into your front pocket to flop down into the worn out but still comfortable couch.
“They get hurt?” Anxiety tainting her voice from across the room.
Peeking through your fingers at her, dropping them to your thighs to run the length of denim covered skin, “Don’t know really, Sam sounds fine but a concussion or another type of head injury wouldn’t show it’s self right away. From what I did gather they finished up the mission a little over four hours ago, in flight for the last two.”
“What about Bucky?” Meeting your eyes having confided in her years ago about the crush harbored for a certain metal armed ex-assassin turned Cap’s left hand man. Always leaving out the other part of your secret crush. “Speaking of which you ever gonna tell them how you feel?”
“Busting chops about that again Sarah?” Exasperated sigh marches passed barely parted lips, “Something’s broke in three places that’s all Sam ‘Stubborn ass’ Wilson would say. Just not which one of them or what body part exactly.” Firmly ignoring her last question and not picking up on the fact she said them instead of him. To stand hands to hips, leaning back to stretch and possibly pop your spine. “I’m going to town you wanna come or need anything.”
“And you call Sam stubborn,” head shaking with a fond smile tipping her lips upward. Picking up the subtle shift in your demeanor as relief floods your system with knowing they're coming home at least safe. Having guessed your feelings for her older brother not long ago however, keeping that little tidbit to herself. “I’ll come with, give you company and grief along the way. The boy’s won’t come home till later anyway.”
Eyes roll you reach for the car keys on the coffee table, patting your back pocket to check for wallet and the front for cell phone. “Ready to roll?”
Hour and a half later arms loaded with grocery bags, making sure to hide Miss Bridgette’s pie’s from Sam, you and Sarah set to work putting everything away. Setting to work fixing dinner efficiently dancing around each other like a well oiled machine working together in tandem getting each task done. Back door quietly trying to open, Sam poking his head around the well loved oak wood door. Showing a face littered with cuts, a busted bottom lip and dark shadow of a black eye around his left. But his smile still widens flashing pearly whites at seeing the two of you. Entering, Sam places a large locking suit case and round leather carry case not far from the door.
Soft gasp leave’s Sarah’s lips, quickly moving towards her brother to look him over, “You were ugly before now it’s just worse bro.”
Snort existed through his nose, stepping fully into the house with a limp on his right side, accepting the hug she gives him carefully. “You should see the other guy.”
“I’m the other guy,” voice slightly strained but still light almost playful unlike the Bucky of months ago. Though seeing him coming around Sam, arm cradled close in a black cloth sling. Peeks of plaster noticeable making you groan, head shaking at the very sight of him. Assortment of bruises littered his face, his own busted lip, and a three inch cut circling just above his collarbone. Seeing the storm brewing in your eyes, “No we didn’t fight and Sam didn’t cause these wonderful souvenirs.”
“Stupid ass got captured, wouldn’t listen to my plan…”
“You didn’t have a plan Sam not a logistical one…”
“Oh, so you bulldozing in like a raging bull in a China shop worked so well. Who got capture?” Pressing a finger behind his ear to lift the shell listening for Bucky’s answer. “I’m sorry I can’t hear you. You’re gonna say you right Robo soldier cause that’s the correct answer.”
Exasperated with them both, “Shut it and sit down dinner’s ready. I swear the two of you fight worse than Cass and AJ.” Authority ringing through Sarah’s tone cutting eyes at both men.
“Oh sweetheart Cass and AJ have nothing on these two bone heads, more maturity in their little bodies than both of them put together.” Rubbing your temples trying to fend off the building migraine behind your eyes. “Listening to constant bickering I wanna put them in a ‘Get along shirt.'”
Scowl in place while giving them a full once over. Cataloguing the damage you could see and wondering about that which you couldn’t. Noticing the length of Bucky’s hair almost a shaggy just falling a little over his ears and brushing the collar of the black t-shirt he’s wearing. Full beard dusting his cheeks and chin reminding you of those days long gone back in Wakanda. In contrast to Sam’s neatly kept mustache and goatee, close cropped haircut smartly framing his handsome face. Looking much like the day he and Bucky left three months ago on their reconnaissance mission. Knowing better as looks deceive and clothes cover up places eyes can’t see without stripping them naked. The very thought peeking interest but pushing those thoughts back with a frown. Of course it doesn’t stop you from wanting to hug them both mindful of injures unseen that brings a scowl to your features.
“You wouldn’t?” Traces of fear slicing through those deep russet browns. “I thought you loved me Y/N?”
Speaking over Sam, “What’s a ‘Get along’ shirt?”
Caught between wanting to roll her eyes and chuckle, “It’s a big shirt we’d put the two of you in till ya stop bickering like children and actually get along.” Dishing up dinner, Sarah looks towards both men. Trying hard not to burst out laughing at the sour look on Sam’s face nor the still slightly confused one on Bucky’s.
“I see smoke coming from his ears,” snarky quip receiving a back handing smack to his arm.
Bowel’s placed at the table, “Aim for the head next time Sar.” Taking the seat on Sam’s right offering him a cheekily smile, “Might actually knock the few brain cells he has left around and jump start the hamster running the wheel.”
“You both wound me,” clutching his chest dramatically. “With friends and family like this who can you trust.”
“Dramatic’s must come with handling the shield,” cerulean eyes rolling edged with teasing tone. Glancing towards Sam first then you beside him, going to explain for Sarah’s benefit. “Steve could put on some high melodrama back in the day. Much like Samuel here.” Scratching at his chin with vibranium fingers, a low hiss only you catch sounds when the plates catch the little hairs.
Scoffing, “Only Sarah calls me that first off, second look who’s talking Mr. Bionic Staring machine scaring off everyone who comes within two feet. Dramatics run through your veins just as well. ”
“Children,” both women exclaim hands coming down to slam the table at the same. Before time digging into dinner as the back door opens with Cass and AJ storming inside with excited chatter upon seeing both Sam and Bucky.
Each asking about what happened, how’d the mission go and why exactly Bucky’s sporting a sling and cast. All questions peeking the interested of both women with brows raised and narrowed eyes.
“Settle in first and eat dinner,” Sam intones wanting to keep most of what happened from his family. “For the most part the mission went successful.”
Very unladylike snort leaves your nose hidden behind a glass of sweet tea you sip from, “At least you came back in one piece or three in someone’s case.” Eyes narrow even farther on Bucky who has the good graces to look sheepish and divert his eyes.
“But the super serum why didn’t it help like that,” AJ snapped his little fingers for emphasis on the quickness the serum should work or so he thinks.
“Doesn’t quiet work that way AJ,” Bucky starts running a hand through his longer than usual hair. Giving a short frustrated tug before returning to the topic at hand. “Yeah the serum helps speed up the healing process it’s not instantaneous and,” pausing to side eye you not wanting to admit there’s more injures than just his arm.
Scowl returning having a feeling you know why he’s paused in explaining, “Takes longer to heal when multiple injures are involved.”
Dinner finishes with other questions, skirting the full truth about the mission, discussing the coming week with work and school. Sam’s boyish smile appears when Sarah brings out the pie, cutting out slices to pass around with Reddi-whip, coffee for the adults, milk for the kids. Silence settles for a moment the enjoyment of pie more important to savor and only once done do you raise to start cleaning up.
“I’ll,” shooting Sarah a look with a shake of your head.
“You got paperwork to catch up on babe I’ve got this, besides Sam volunteered to help. Didn’t you Sam?” Shooting a look his way, clearly speaking volumes if the answer comes back no.
Brow arched in question but thought better then to ask, though he flips the script on you, “Of course, Bucky volunteer’s.” Quickly moving away from the hand threatening to land a hard punch to his right thigh. Almost toppling to the floor in his hast to move Sam tweaked his hip a twinge of pain slicing through his features.
“Serves you right Wilson,” thought a slice of regret skates across your thoughts. Head shaking you stand gathering plates as the boys excuse themselves to play video games.
“Homework first or I’m taking those games away,” Sarah yells after them looking in your direction for a second. “You got these two?” Pointing at each of them in turn with her own frown dropping her lips downward.
“Sadly yes,” exasperation clearly written in the rigidness of you stance and narrowing to slits of your eyes. “Blissfully unaware or want to know everything?”
“Unaware I’m just happy their back whole,” nodding Sarah takes her leave, heading for the home office.
Times flown, six months in fact since Karli’s death and Sam taking over the mantle of Captain America. Going above and beyond to change how the worlds become and see’s the shield. Using Delacroix as home base to keep himself grounded and around for his family. Surprisingly enough including you and Bucky the house feels a touch over crowded but wouldn’t want things any different.
“Care to explain what that means?” Limping with hands full towards the sink, Sam places his arm load down watching you move around the kitchen. Putting leftovers up, setting to work on the dishes, the familiarity you exude warms a place in Sam’s heart. Always pushing those thoughts from his mind, your his best friend and wouldn’t see him in any other way. Especially with your heart firmly filled with Bucky.
Giving your back to both men and only acknowledging their presence when Bucky comes over with a bowel. “Thanks,” leaves your lips with a nod.
“We’re sorry for leaving you behind Y/N, but Sam and I agreed things were to dangerous neither of us wanted you to get hurt,” trying to reason Bucky leans his back against the counter beside you. Tugging once again at his too long hair that gets slightly tangled in the plates of his fingers.
“You actually agreed on something?” Catching his actions, your head shakes grabbing for the towel to dry soapy hands and help with his dilemma. “Instead you both come back looking like train wreck’s all beaten, broken and bruised. With a busted arm,” finished with untangling his fingers to point at his arm. Whirling around to assess Sam who’s trying not to put weight on his right leg, “Banged up hip and God know what else internally. Neither one of you are spring chickens for heaven’s sake.”
“Don’t know what your talking about Y/N? I’m not a day over twenty-five,” taking an aim to make you smile and ease the tension in your shoulders. Frown appearing when your countenance doesn’t change but deepens, “Talk to the resident Centurion who got his ass captured and tortured for over a week.”
Low growl leaves your lips pursed together in a grim line, “Do either of you think about the consequences of your actions? Of what’ll happen without either of you in this God forsaking world?” Tossing your hands up and turning back to dish washing, something to keep from chocking the life outta the two of them, or spilling your inner most thoughts. Afraid to loose either man the very thought making your heart clinch painfully in your chest, breathing picking up as tears gloss over your eyes. Plates clang loudly, forcefully slamming them into the drying rack making both men wince at your actions.
“Y/N,” coming up behind you large warm hands carefully rest on tense shoulders. Aware of your feelings for a certain cyborg the thought a little bitter to take but Sam resigns himself to the role of best friend. “We’re sorry really,” taking a breath and clearing his throat wanting to make amends and explain. “We thought, planned, things just…”
“Went to shit around us, it’s not like Sam or I wanted to get the crap beating out of us doll it just,” shrugging vibranium hand coming to rest on your shoulder beside Sam’s. “Got complicated.”
Taking a deep breath drawing in the scents of Sam’s citrus and cider wood cologne you couldn’t put your finger on naming, mixing with Bucky’s old world sandalwood base cologne of 4711. Eyes close for a moment blinking back the tears, and to gather thoughts, righting them in an order that makes sense. Trying to keep out the feelings currently jumbling up your brain. “I know,” body sags back against Sam’s strong chest while unconsciously leaning towards Bucky’s hand. “Neither of you will do that shit again. Do I make myself clear?”
“Not if things go dark side like this time, we’re not putting you in harms way,” feeling you stiffen Sam steps back, Bucky’s hand drops back to his side when you whirl on the man behind you. Stance ridge and firm, Sam crosses his arms adding his own glare and not backing down. “My decision is final on the matter and no amount of arguing will change that.”
Understanding Sam’s position, however the thought of staying behind, waiting to find out if… no you push those thoughts aside. “Mine, that’s who makes the choice not either of you,” heat of annoyance flaring to life as you look between the two men. “Knowing what I signed up for, choose to stick around and help put this broken blue marble we call home back together. I won’t sit out the next mission we clear on that?”
Rubbing the back of his neck, barely audible hiss leaves Bucky’s lips at having hair yanked out by the roots. Though his voice is steady when asking, “Why did you stick around? Thought once Walker handed over the shield, the Flag smashers agenda crashed and burned you’d skip out on the next train back to normal.” Not that he minded of course, in fact Bucky rather enjoyed your company, reminded him of those first months out of cryo getting to know each other. Plus his questions distracted you from getting an answer that won’t satisfy.
“I have my reasons,” giving a half hearted shrug you turn back to finishing up the dishes not really wanting to explain. Not fully sure yourself why you’ve stuck around though deep down you know it has to do with both men. “Reasons neither of you need to know.”
Sharing a look with Bucky, “Don’t pull that shit with us sweetheart you demand answers now we ask the same in return.”
Sure they still argued like an old married couple but a begrudging understanding has built between the pair, coming to an almost friendship neither would fully admit to. Both wanting to protect the small family friend’s circle patched together like grandma’s old quilt. Tattered, frayed and a few wholes but well loved and always cared for. Eyes landing back on you to watch the forward slump of your shoulders rounded inward along with your chin dropped to your chest.
“I have the two of you house broken,” idea forming to steer the conversation away. “Don’t need that headache on repeat and I wouldn’t leave the two of you bone heads alone to kill each other or drive poor Sarah crazy,” quicker than either can react you’ve scooped up hand fulls of soap bubbles to smash into both their faces. Deflecting the conversation away from having to answer and lightening the mood. Or so you hoped with the playfully murderous looks both men shoot you. Skirting Sam’s grabby hands heading to put the kitchen table between yourself, Captain America and the Winter Soldier. “Now boys that’s just all in good fun and your both hurt so I suggest you think about your actions before retaliating.”
Wiping the remains of soapy bubbles from his face, thick fingers making wet tracks over denim to dry hands. Sam edges a little closer intent on trying to snag your arm. That ghosts through his fingers, “For now but remember paybacks a bitch sweetheart.” Bright smile tugs his full lips, head shaking though he knows there’s so much more your hiding from both he and Bucky. One day he’ll crack that secret you hold so dear, for now Sam lets you cling tightly.
Watching him go you turn towards Bucky who’s smirk sets you back a moment. “I don’t think I like that look Barnes,” arms crossed mustering a half glare. “Sam’s right you really can see the smoke rising from your head.”
“Hahaha that jokes getting old,” light hearted quip falling from his lips, eyes raking your form as you near the sink. Catching you looking between finishing the dishes and making sure Bucky’s not going to retaliate. “I come in peace promise besides I’m too old for revenge I’ll leave it to you young whipper snappers,” throwing his voice to sound like an old man.
Laughter rings full and deep from your parted lips, soapy hands gripping the sink to keep from toppling over in mirth. His own chuckle exists on a grin, cerulean eyes taking in how carefree you look. Tension and worry melted away with his well played grandpa joke. Making Bucky wish he got to see you like this more often but then he remembered why he never searched. Why he left you alone and only within the last ten or so months managed to reconnect the missing dots in his life. Sure there’s still blood on his hands he tries to scrub clean with each mission, to make those amends and not just avenge. But truly help people in ways that didn’t require lead or blood.
Still wondering, so he gives voice to those thoughts, “Why didn’t you go back to your life doll?” Feeling he’s perpetuated a grave error in asking the question but a part of him wants. No needed the answer to know why you’d give up a happy life for one of danger and uncertainty with him and Sam.
Sobering, his question hitting you like a ton of cement bricks keeping you from turning to face him. Wincing when another hiss echos around inside your head from your right side. “Tell you what Buck you let me cut that hair and beard of yours I’ll answer your questions.”
“I get you don’t… wait… what?” Not sure he’d heard you right. Pain making a return to fog his brain for the moment as throbbing radiates across his broken clavicle to the dislocated shoulder, dancing along the fractured radius and painfully tingling his fingers. Soft curse exists his lips reminding himself to take Sam’s suggestions next time though he wouldn’t let the other man know. “Don’t happen to have any pain meds do ya doll?”
Eyes narrow, “Which parts did they break?” Holding up a hand to stop him from answering while you head towards your room. Grabbing up the small med kit Sharon gave you months back for times like these. Pausing to scoop up the hair scissors and trimer, along with a shaver and cream, both of which belonging to Sam. “Now you were saying?”
Placing everything on the table, unzipping the medium size unassuming black bag pulling out a small bottle to pop the top and wiggle out two pills. Handing those over to Bucky who just stares at them resting in his metal palm.
“Trying to kill me doll?” Teasing tone to the cadence of his words while popping them into his mouth and excepting the glass of water. Downing in one go and handing it back, “Never did like pills reminds me of Steve.”
Resting a gentle hand on his bad shoulder, “If I tried to kill ya Buck you’d see it coming,” snickering at the wide eyed look he gives you. Sobering with understanding filled eyes that stay locked with his, “I’m sorry it”s not my intentions to bring up the past.” Moving to put the glass down, you stay at the sink looking out over the backyard, orange and reds dancing over the rippling surface of the bayou. Sinking sun creating a cornucopia of color heralding the on coming twilight and the end of another day.
“You didn’t Y/N,” coming to stand next to you watching the golden ball of life giving light slowly sink into the horizon. On the tip of his tongue to speak about Steve, the abandonment he felt acutely with the absence of his best friend. Slowly filled by your present, that of Sam’s and his family. “I guess ‘Till the end of the line’ meant just till he could get back to who he really missed.” Anguish heard loudly through soft spoken words not meant for your ears but once uttered there’s no going back.
Out of your peripheral vision you study Bucky for a moment heart breaking for the man who’s lost so much to then fully face him. His own gaze staying straight ahead staring unseen out the window with tan lace curtains framing the coming twilight. Over head light casting shadows in the hallows and angles of his features, bringing out the bruises highlighting the cuts, making your heart ache for this man in ways you’ve tried to push aside. Ways you didn’t want it to feel in case of rejection but couldn’t help the tightening in your chest nor the want to embrace and hold Bucky close.
“Come on,” without thinking your hand slips into his vibranium palm tugging till he follows and only dropping to scoop up trimmer, combs and scissors before heading out the back door.
For a moment Bucky stood there thankful to Shuri for the ability to feel warmth and the weight of your hand in his vibranium limb. The very thoughts your simple gesture conjures damns his heart making it beat triple time. When your head pops back around the door sweet smile crossing those kissable lips. Bucky has to remind himself you’re off limits friends nothing more and to breath. Your beauty stealing the air from his lungs, making it hard to focus on anything except your present.
Catching the out of focus look in his cerulean eyes mind swirling with questions as to what he’s thinking about. “You gonna stand there taking root or get your silly ass out here,” motioning with a jerk of your head over your shoulder smile still firmly in place. Making sure he’s actually moving before existing to place a stool about middle of the back porch. Patting the hardwood barstool then reaching up to tug on the pull string as light floods the area casting a bright glow.
Transfixed for a moment in the doorway with the peek of skin allowed to his eyes. Your heather grey band shirt riding up teasingly tormenting him. Cursing internally, tongue trapped between indenting teeth to keep the sounds at bay. Till the hard slap of your palm against wooden seat draws his attentions and he robotically takes the seat. Stiffening with the fluttering of a barber’s cape hating to have things around his neck. Only to settle once you have it in place and buttoned reminding him your not there to hurt or torture him. Fingers brushing lightly over the exposed skin of his neck, creating goosebumps to dance across his flesh.
“Not too tight?” Gently running nimble fingers through his hair, blunt nails scratching the scalp. Finding it hard to keep from rubbing into your hands and fighting the urge to purr with each pass. You work the larger knots out carefully, pulling a comb from the back pocket of your jeans to run through his hair. “You with me Buck?”
“Hmm?” Simple noise issues from the back of his throat lost in the tingling sensations your fingers bloom across his body. Wanting to chase the feeling bringing peace to his mind much like the soft cadence your voice takes on with the intimacy surrounding the two of you. Sweet chuckle music to his ears and snaps him back to now, noticing you’ve paused your hands waiting for a response, “Sorry no I’m good.”
“Enjoying yourself Barnes?” Teasingly quipped while adjusting the cape to cover his back. Making sure all his hair lays over the edges and carefully combing out the smaller knots your fingers missed. Secretly enjoying the soft chestnut strands as they curl around your fingers. Massaging his scalp hoping to relax his tense posture when a particularly stubborn knot has you accidentally giving a not so gentle tug. Garnering a low moan from the man in front of you. “Sorry Buck,” working the knot out with a little more care taking the sound as one of pain.
Throat clearing, thankful his crotch is currently covered to not give away the secret he’s concealing. Praying to all the heavens you’ve taken the moan as one of pain instead of pleasure that’s surfing through his veins with a simple hair pull. “Yes, and it’s fine,” words pushed passed lips held taunt to keep from letting any sound out. Searching his mind for a topic to settle on, willing his body to stop reacting to the warmth of yours.
Each brush of fingers sends heat flaring to life along his nerves. Knowing the pain killers don’t worked through his system that quickly. Yet, the throbbing ache once present has diluted to a low annoying thump with the heat of your hands on his cotton covered shoulder. Wanting to lean back into your body but holds himself ridge from doing something stupid like enjoying the moment. Therefore clears his throat, “You’ve got me at your mercy doll ready to answer my questions?”
“Should I worry what you’ll ask?” Moving from behind him to head back into the kitchen. Grabbing the empty spray bottle to fill with warm water and head back out.
Eyes close with the first spritz of water, chin dropping to chest as you work to wet his hair. “Why?”
“Why what?” Knowing what he’s asking, your distracted for a moment putting the spray bottle’s trigger through a belt loop incase its needed once your satisfied with the wetness of his hair. “I’ll need more specifics than just why. Why’s the sky blue? Why’s it so damn hot? So many why questions you gotta stop wasting your breath Buck.”
“Cheeky doll very cheeky you know damn well what I mean,” keeping his head still to prevent you from severing an ear.
Smirking, setting to work on trimming up the top back portion of his head, trying to keep from childishly making faces. “Sure don’t Sarge.”
Groan slipping passed before he’s able to trap and swallow the sound at the off handed use of his military rank. Wondering which deity had it out for his ass today. Cursing the fact he’s let you so close to breath in the flowery scent of your body. Gentle use of those skilled fingers through his hair not making things any better for the growing problem tenting his jeans. Returning to himself when you move to his left shortening the hair over his ear. “Why’d you stay with us? I thought,” remembering those painful words back in Madripoor. “I thought you had a happy life to go back to.”
“Ear hustling Barnes?” Switching sides and glancing down with a raised brow you know he doesn’t see.
Looking up to try and catch your eye your focus on cutting his hair makes the attempt impossible. So he settles on, “Don’t know what you mean doll. Just asking a question,” trying to hold the shiver at bay when your fingers brush over the shell of his ear.
“Since your asking it means you didn’t hear everything Sam and I talked about,” thankful that’s the case or things would get a whole lot complicated. “I lied.”
Head whipping to the side so quickly you fear he’s damaged his neck with the wince taking over his handsome features. “Lied why?”
“Reasons,” ‘Ones I won’t tell you James,’ speaking the last words in your mind, careful probing fingers check for anything popped out. Garnering a hiss of pain when you’ve found the break in his clavicle. “What did you break besides the hamster running your wheel brain?”
Bitting off the curse as pain flared over his right side. Gritting out, “Clavicle, dislocated shoulder, fractured radius, you can see the cuts and bruises so take it a little easy on this old man.”
“How… Why did you get captured?” Worry fights fear both dance with anger marching through your veins as a Thanksgiving Day parade band would down the streets of New York City. The very thought of both your men hurt and so far away from home torn a hole in your heart. Thoughts you try to push away and focus on the job of cutting Bucky’s hair.
Finishing up what you could on the back of his head, Bucky feels you come around to the front. Knees spread to accommodate your body, closing his eyes to keep from staring at your breasts. Licking suddenly dry lips with having you extra close, he tries to gather an answer to your question. “We needed an in so I made a decision.”
“One I’m sure Sam disagreed on,” carding your fingers through the top, snipping pieces checking length. Jealous over how soft his hair feels between your digits. Woodsy pine scent reaching your nose that twitches in pleasure at the fragrance matching what you always thought he’d smell like.
“Yeah well we ran out of time doll. Couldn’t let what remains of LAF get away,” eyes quickly open only to slam shut again with having you still too near for his own good.
Every brush of your fingers, thighs brushing against his with every move, your flowery scent wrapping around his heart to squeeze tight. Breath punched from his lungs when your knee makes slight contact with his erection. Shooting pleasurable fireworks off behind his closed lids. Wishing for your hands on his body, wondering what they’d feel like over bare skin. If you’d shy away from the scars littering his flesh or… he wouldn’t, didn’t need to think about the alternative.
Unsure why he gasped you move from between his legs and look upon his face confused as to his ridge posture eyes held tightly closed. Insecurities rushing through your mind, setting up shop to remind you no man let alone someone as handsome as Bucky would ever want to look at you. Shoving back those thoughts to ask, “You okay Bucky?”
“Fucking fabulous doll,” bitting out the words while trying to reign in the need to grab hold of your hips, bringing you back against him. Wanting to find out if you’d fit as good or better than what he’s imagined during those dream filled nights he doesn’t talk about with anyone. “Finished?” Praying you’ll say yes, the temptation becoming almost unbearable.
Unconvinced by his words but pushes that aside and stepping farther back to round him, grabbing up the trimmer on the way with a numbered comb. “Almost but then I still have your beard to do.”
“Fuck,” low gravely voice intones the single word hoping you’ve not heard and cursing the heaven for this test of his will and desires. In another life Bucky wouldn’t have hesitated to ask you out, wine and dine with dancing till midnight. Taking you home with a simple kiss of promise with more to come. But he’s different now and you don’t deserve to have a broken man on your hands.
Swallowing harshly to cover your growing need to escape and bury yourself in another program or book to distract from those awful thoughts running around in your mind. Replaying all the brush offs and look aways as rejection shattering your heart. Pushing you to finish his new hair cut that much quicker. “Done, now how short you want your beard?”
“Gone,” knowing exactly what he’s saying and damning himself to the torture of a different kind.
Coming back in front of him, you slip between his parted knees so easily a thought you try to push away while switching the trimmer combs and flicking the on button. Carefully cupping his left cheek while shortening the right for a closer shave once your done. “Surely you didn’t just let them capture you.” Returning to a safer subject other than how good his bearded jaw felt in your warm palm. Wondering how it’d feel in other places.
“Offered myself up for a little bloody torture and a few broken bones. I’m here to tell the tale instead of those guys Y/N. They're off the streets and we have the information needed to finish taking down LAF.” Teeth gritting to keep from rubbing his jaw into your palm, from turning to kiss the center and devour you with his mouth.
Pausing a moment, “But you could’ve gotten killed James.” Sorrow coloring the cadence of your tone, eyes filled with fear at what could’ve happened. “You should’ve called me, I could’ve helped.”
Heart stopping, never had you spoken his first name, always Bucky or Buck, Barnes when your angry but never James. Opening his darken cerulean orbs breath trapped somewhere between lungs and mouth at the sorrow written deep in those eyes he never could not stare into. Heart hammering back to life with the subtle brushing of your fingers over his cheek, “Would it have matter?”
Confusion tips your head to the side, “What you dying or me helping?”
“Dying,” single word dropped like a bomb destroying everything in the path.
“James,” softly spoken with so much emotion held within the countenance of your features. Watching the ghosts float through those beautiful cerulean eyes, memories of a time he couldn’t control, of deeds done to people who didn’t deserve the pain and death he dealt out as the Fist of Hydra. Tears gloss over your eyes once again trying to blink them away to keep them from clogging your emotions filled throat. “It matter’s Barnes, matters to a lot of people you’re just too stubborn to realize that.” Shaking your head to clear the fog and get back to work.
Speechless Bucky just sits there letting you finish up trimmer the hair away as if trying to erase the past months, the torture he let happen with no regard to his personal well being. During this time your words chase around his mind, combined with Sam’s out right demand of him to never put himself in harms way like that again. Adding more questions added than any true answers. Delicate fingers brush over trimmed facial hair bringing him back to the present right as you move to take the barber’s cape from around his neck. Missing the warmth of your touch, heat radiating from your body, your scent filling his nose and making him drunk on you.
Folding the cape to drape over your arm, “I’ll shave you as well come back inside.” Voice slightly rough with unshed tears avoiding looking directly at Bucky and missing the longing written in the ocean pools. Mistaking his lack of response for rejection of your words and feelings. You enter the house placing the small hand load down and moving a chair over towards the sink. Returning to grab up the shaving cream and razor, pulling a fresh wash cloth from the draw by the sink too wet it hot.
“You don’t have to,” entering and closing the back door with the heel of his boot. Bucky leans against the counter watching you with a closed expression. Pain dull but still worming its way through his veins along with so many thoughts.
Glancing his way, “I know,” motioning with a wave of your hand, “but if I don’t that beard’ll come back in short order and we’ll have to do this all over again.” Going for playful to ease the tension built from the lingering words of out on the porch, “Bring your ass over here Buck.”
Your change in mood has a confused frown pulling his mouth down but complies with the order. Taking up the seat with spread legs and turned up face watching you wring out the wash cloth. Using your elbow and tipping his head back to gently place the hot cloth around what’s left of his beard to soften the hair and wake up the pores. Catching the small muffled groan, “To hot?”
“No, perfect,” faintly hearing the two simple words you grab up the shaving cream to put a generous amount in your palm before pulling the quickly cooling cloth from his face. Tossing it towards the sink and applying a layer of cream to his skin. Left overs rinsed from your hands quickly before drying and grasping the razor with steady hands. “Just a little off the top if you please,” boyish smirk slips over his lips tipping cream covered cheeks up while trying to be funny.
Eyes rolling, “To late for that one top’s already taken care of.” Using the pad of your thumb to push the skin of his cheek taunt. Carefully dragging the razor over his flesh intending to keep your gaze directed towards working the blade over his check. However, you’re unable to do so while cleaning the razor as your eyes dart up catching the fact Bucky’s gaze firmly rests on your face. Heat blooming across your body, eyes drop back to his cheek intent on getting finished quickly to avoid any farther embarrassment.
Meanwhile Bucky maps every feature of your face, the slant of your nose, set of your eyes, cupids bow of your top lip. Visions of drawing the plump flesh in for a bite and pull before letting go with a wet pop, filter through his mind. Finding himself in a rather precarious predicament, thighs spread to accommodate your body, his palms itch to grasp and tug you into his lap. Bitting back a moan each touch brings, the gentleness tearing a new hole in armored covered heart. Wanting to keep you out but finding it harder to do every time you show the kindness his life lacked for decades.
Minds eye drawing the curves of your cheeks, lips twitching to caress, fingers tapping trapped in plaster and cloth against his body. Wanting to brush his knuckles over your throat to gently grasp the back of your neck and bring your lips against his for a slow sweet drink of the tempting cavern of your warm mouth. Only snapping back to reality with the soft brush of your fingers along his jawline.
Searching for any hairs left behind, soothingly palming his cheeks with cool hands desperate to taste his skin. Drag your lips over the same spots the razor just graced. Teasing the tip of your tongue along the hard edge of his jaw to place a kiss just below his ear. Tempted to even suck a mark for everyone to see. You swallow harshly removing your hands from his cheeks to rinse and warm up the cloth to clean off any residual shaving cream from his face.
“Finished,” clearing your emotions clogged throat, stepping towards the sink, your profile the only side Bucky sees as you work to clean up the mess.
Feeling rather than hearing him stand heat radiating of his body just a few inches shy of brushing against yours. “Thank you doll,” impulsively leaning forward to brush his lips over your cheek. Lingering longer than he should but unable too stop himself from pressing soft slight chapped lips to the corner of your mouth. “Next time I need shavin’ I know who to come too,” breathing the words before pulling away, taking his leaving quickly to keep from doing something even stupider. Like wrap you up into his arms and actually kissing those pillow soft lips. Backdoor swinging closed a little harder than he meant in his bid to get away from your warmth and tempting body.
Frozen in place, skin tingling from just that slight press while your heart beats almost out of your chest. Pounding against your rib cage so hard fear it’ll crack a rib any second now. White knuckles grip the sinks edge, heat flaring across your body to pool low and throb through your lady parts. Thighs unconsciously rub together needing friction to alleviate the ache growing between your legs.
“Did you cut him or take a hunk of hair out and now he looks like Frankenstein monster?” Teasing tone to his quip, Sam enters the kitchen still staring at the back door. Having watched the exchange from the darkened hallway. Reverting his eyes to your back, taking in the ridge posture of your spine with a slight very subtle shake. “Y/N what’s wrong?” Swiftly coming up behind you, hands gripping your shoulders to turn you around. “Did Bucky say or do something wrong?” Worry creasing his brow the want to hold you close growing with each second your not in his arms.
Looking up into the kind russet eyes flashing with concern and worry, “No,” head shaking, “no he didn’t Sam just…” unable to stop yourself from burying your body against Sam’s firm chest. Trying to figure out how to explain what’s running around in your head. The indecision, thoughts you know shouldn’t roll through your mind doing just that as your arms wind around his trim waist.
“Just what sweetheart?” Wanting to help smooth things over between his two best friends even if it meant swallowing his own feelings.
Keeping your eyes closed, breathing in his cedar wood and citrus scent, burying your nose against his collarbone. Always able to calm the raging storm of emotions boiling through your veins. Confusion setting in with those same tingles you feel when Bucky touches you now dances across your body at the warmth of Sam’s arms cradling you close. Reminding you of earlier when his chest pressed to your back strong hands gently placed on your shoulders. The shiver you suppressed at the touch of both men. At the memory your eyes pop open and you quickly push away from Sam as if he’s burnt you. Needing to escape and figure out what’s going on.
“Nothing, it doesn’t matter, I’m sorry,” feet quickly taking you from the kitchen into the safe arms of your bedroom.
Missing the confused look marring Sam’s face that turns into hurt at the way you’ve shoved him aside. Body sagging against the counter, hand rubbing at the back of his neck searching for what’s changed in such a short period of time.
“Men, blind and just plain foolish,” landing a hard hit to his shoulder, which he rubs to alleviate the pain. Sarah comes up beside her older brother with a raised brow. “Still don’t get it? Searching for exactly why she reacted so strongly? Think Samuel use that big brain you have and actually put it to good use.”
Frown creasing between his eyes and drawing his lips down, “Left behind sucks Sarah that’s all it amounts to. But we… I couldn’t have her along, wouldn’t risk her life like that.”
“Has nothing to do with leaving her home Sam,” giving him a meaningful look that still bewilders him. “Why didn’t you want her along but you took Bucky with you?”
“He’s a super soldier Sar he can take the hits not that I want him hurt either. Shit when he let himself get captured,” moving towards the abandoned chair to plop down heavily. “He scared the living shit outta me, I thought…” hard to swallow the memories of watching those men pulling an unconscious Bucky into a van. Driving off before he could plant a tracker and barely able to get up with bruised ribs making breathing painful. Sam runs a hand over the short hair unsure when things got so complicated between the three of them.
Pulling up a chair in front of Sam, “You’d lost him?” Seeing the nod Sarah’s features softened knowing from the tell’s she picked up watching the three of them for so long. “You love them?”
“What?” Head whipping up so quickly making Sam wince. “Of course I do but not like that I mean their family, you know I’ll do anything to protect my family.”
Hand resting on his shoulder, “You keep telling yourself that big bro maybe one day you’ll actually believe it and able to push those feelings away good enough to keep them at arms length.” Looking up at her, “Just a word of advice,” seeing him nod, “don’t push those emotions away, you deserve that love they both would readily give you.”
Softly closing the door behind you heading towards the ensuite bathroom for a nice cold shower, preforming your nightly routine, and shutting off every light except the one beside your bed. Falling into the soft mattress with your current book keeping you company for the rest of the night. Eyes start to droop, words blur and you read the same sentence half a dozen times. Book falling against your chest as a yawn takes over your features.
Body stretching out against cool sheets jumping when a soft knock echos around your room, eyes darting towards the clock to see its just a little passed mid night. Slowly getting out of bed, pulling the extra long dark blue with little pink flowers dotting the sleep shirt down to cover your ass and thighs. Thinking its Sarah checking on you, eyes shocked wide with the small crack you open the door to spy Bucky standing there fidgeting.
“Everything all right Buck?” Opening the door wider to lean against the casing arms crossed just under your breasts.
Swallowing, glancing from your eyes to lips repeatedly. Trying to form the words he wants to speak when the decision makes itself clear and Bucky surges forward. Gently wrapping vibranium fingers around the back of your neck and bragging you against his strong chest. Slanting his lips against yours, nipping your bottom lip to make you gasp and slipping his eager tongue passed into the warm depths of your mouth. Leading the kiss and praying he’s not wrong.
Rewarded by your arms winding around his neck careful of his injures. Fingers tugging at the now shorten strands thanks to your expect hands. Garnering a low moan from the depths of his chest, one that rambles with a pleased hum as you return the kiss. Tangling your tongues together making nothing soft nor gentle about this melding of mouths. Only breaking apart for both of you to gasp for air.
“No, nothing’s all right doll. I can’t stop thinking about you,” resting your foreheads together sharing common air. Fingers at the base of your skull massaging the tension with surprisingly easy pressure. “I’d done fighting, done pushing you away, I need you Y/N.”
“James?” Lips tingling from a kiss you’ve only dreamt about as confusion marring your tone, eyes blinking a few times to make sure you’ve pushed the sleepy haze from your mind.
Soft groan issues at hearing you whisper just first name, hand slipping down to wrap around your waist and pull your taut to his body. “If…” trying to push the next words past his lips, “if you don’t want…”
“Us, we need to know now sweetheart. We won’t push you into anything you don’t want,” Sam’s voice full of desire and longing cuts across Bucky’s for a moment.
Making you look up from eyes locked with Bucky to stare at Sam trying to process his words, the look in those beautiful russet eyes you can’t pull yours away from. Till Bucky presses a kiss to just below your ear, “We know it’s a lot to take in doll and you can say no…”
“I,” gulping like a fish out of water, heat thumping through your veins at the unspoken promise both sets of eyes show. “I don’t know what to say.”
Stepping forward to push you back a step so Sam can fully enter your bedroom and close the door. He comes behind you sandwiching your body between two walls of muscle and masculine warmth. Pressing a kiss to the opposite cheek, lips brushing over the shell of your ear, “There’s no going back sweetheart you’re ours if you say yes. But if the answer is no I’m not going to lie things will change. Awkward as hell yes especially at first but I,” Bucky clears his throat to which Sam nods, “we would work through that with you. Loosing your friendship can’t happen no matter what.”
Removing yourself from between their warm bodies to collapse at the end of the bed, head in your hands. Mind so confused, a jumbled mix of desire and lust touched with a heavy dose of love that scares the living shit outta you. Feeling the bed dip on either side, removing your hands to glance at both men. Seeing the reassurance in those cerulean and russet orbs you swallow to wet your parched throat. Gaining strength to finally speak, “I don’t want to loose either of you,” looking between both men. Taking each hand within your own, “But this last mission taught me I don’t want to deny my feelings any longer.”
“What feelings doll?” Giving your hand an encouraging squeeze.
Looking into Bucky’s cerulean eyes, “I’m in love with both of you.” Switching to Sam’s russet orbs seeing the blatant want shining only boosts your confidence to lean over. Cupping his jaw and bringing your lips against his. Different from the kiss you shared with Bucky. Who’s bottom lip begs for a nibbling, Sam’s fuller lips press against your own in tender caresses.
Gentler too, a soft slant of his mouth against yours, pressing twice at different angles before tracing over your bottom lip. Gaining entrance on a sigh of need to check in with your tongue before tangling together. Heated palm cupping your cheek, thumb brushing over the apple twice while he artfully pillages your mouth. Drawing out a low moan squeak following when a set of lips slide over the side of your neck nibbling a short path to suck a mark behind your ear. Making you weak and boneless against Sam, who releases your cheek and hand to grip your hips, having you straddle his thighs.
Kiss breaking for air, “I’m to heavy Sam, your hip.”
“You’re prefect baby girl no arguing understand?” Cupping your ass in both hands to roll your hips against the hard bulge of his erection. Teeth gritting at how good you feel in his arms, the damp heat of your core only serving to make him grow harder with each brush against your cloth covered pussy. Sam reclaims your mouth, this kiss much different. Desperate and demanding taking no prisoners this time as he immediately slips his tongue back into your mouth. Pulling a groan from deep within your chest, arms going around his neck to help move your body against his. The delicious friction sending jolts of pleasure radiating out over your body, clit throbbing with a need you’ve never felt before.
Hissing at the cool sensations of Bucky’s vibranium fingers drawing circles across your back. Pushing your sleep shirt off your body arms raising, breaking the kiss to accomplish the task. Looking over your shoulder at the bare chested Barnes, mouth salivating at the sight eager to touch and kiss every inch. Brought back to Sam with the heat of his mouth connecting to your pulse, adding his own mark to your body while his callused fingers dances across your back.
Cursing his rotten luck for not having use of one hand, Bucky steps forward lowering to his knees carefully. Brushing his lips along your spine while cool alloyed fingers sweep around your body between you and Sam to trace a line between your breasts. Head dropping back to Bucky’s shoulder and baring your breasts to Sam’s hungry glaze and Bucky’s questing fingers.
“So beautiful,” words whispered reverently from Sam’s lips against the damp column of your throat. Mouth tasting each inch of your skin he can reach. Till moist heat circles your nipple, wet tip of his tongue coming out to flick the tightly budded peak before sucking harshly. In contrast to the cool patterns Bucky draws, taking the time to tug before pinching just hard enough that your back arches into Sam’s mouth.
Pushing into Bucky at your back a whimper parting your gasping lips. Needing more of both men surrounding you, slick coating your trembling thighs as you clinch around nothing. Dragging a whine of desperation from you soul,“Please,” single word escaping your mouth.
“What doll? What do you want?” Drawing his lips up to your ear, nipping the lobe bringing it between his teeth giving a sharp bite at the same time Sam flicks his tongue over your nipple.
Letting go with a wet pop, smiling at the whine exiting your heaving chest, “I think out girl needs more Buck. Any thoughts on how to please her?” Brow wiggling over your shoulder at Bucky who just smirks.
Fingers sliding down then under the band of your panties to find you soaked and pulsing. Cool metal meeting heated flesh makes you jolt in Sam’s arms. Grinding down into those wonderful fingers and against the thick ridge of Sam’s cock.
“Don’t stop please,” gasping head lolling back, your eyes close as sensations crash through your veins. Tight coil starting to form with just the brush of his fingers.
Maneuvering closer to slip two fingers into your clinching channel. Deep groan vibrating through his chest and into your back, “Fuck Sam she’s tight and so wet for us. I bet she tastes just as good as she feels.” Rocking your hips, fucking his fingers desperate for that high traveling up from the bottom of your spine. Tickling your tummy with jolts of pleasure only to have it diminish when Bucky pulls his fingers out.
Frustrated whine leaving your lips only to choke on air when Bucky offers one of the fingers perviously buried inside your cunt to Sam. Who doesn’t hesitate to wrap his lips around the single digit, groaning at the very taste of your essence. Circling the tip with his tongue, making sure to clear every drop off while keeping eye contact with Bucky. Mimicking with his mouth how he’d suck Bucky’s cock, garnering a growl from deep within his chest. Letting go with a smirk, “Even better Buck and I bet from the source it’s simply heaven.”
“Only way to find out,” answering grin firmly in place he raises from the floor. Helping you stand on shaky legs turning you to face him. Capturing your lips in an open mouth kiss, flicking his tongue against yours, teasing your bottom lip and drawing out another frustrated groan making him chuckle. “Don’t worry doll we promise you won’t go unsatisfied we’re going to take care of your every need.”
“Don’t tease her Buck it’s not fair,” glint of mischief sparking through those russet eyes that only Bucky catches since your still face him. Sam comes up behind to pressing his bare chest against your back, hands resting on your hips, tugging and letting the band of your panties snap back against your skin. “You can still say no.”
Wiggling back against Sam then pressing forward to feel the hard line of Bucky’s erection against your lower tummy. Knowing why he’s asking, seeing the same sentiment mirrored in Bucky’s eyes that warms your heart filling with love for both men. “Now who’s teasing Samuel,” reaching behind you to slide your palm over his ridged cock giving a squeeze at the same time you palm Bucky. “I’m sure my loves,” enjoying the answering growls from both men. Before another word leaves your lips Sam tugs down your panties letting them pool at your feet as Bucky moves you towards the bed.
Swiping the book from the mattress to lay on the nightstand, smile on his lips at finding the well loved copy of The Fellowship of the Ring. Bringing you to sit then lay back against the cool sheets, trailing his vibranium fingers from your cheek down between your breasts. Circling each nipple, giving the right a light pinch that has your back arching and a gasp existing your paired lips. Distracted till Sam gently grips your left ankle, spreading you open to slide between your legs. Pressing kisses alone the inside of your leg towards your thigh. Soft bread tickling your skin making giggles erupt from your mouth.
“I think she likes that Sam,” the comment spoken against your ear. Placing a kiss to your cheek, “Have to remember to let my own beard grow back out.”
Whimpering softly at the thought one hand fisting the sheets as Sam draws his tongue over the crease between thigh and groin. Purposefully avoiding the spot you want him most, “Payback is a bitch boys,” words growled out right as Bucky envelopes your left nipple into the heat of his mouth.
“Teasing half the fun sweetheart have patience,” looking up from between your legs. Stiffen tongue drawing up from your entrance to clit, circling the little throbbing nub and making your back arch, gasping for air.
“Fuck,” single word breathed from deep within your body. Sweat starting to bead across your forehead. Head tossed back into the pillow free hand carding through Bucky’s chestnut hair tugging the strands harshly till he lets your breast go with a wet pop. You guide his mouth up to yours, demandingly taking the kiss over, slipping your tongue into his mouth this time. Swallowing your moans of delight with each thrust of his tongue. Matching the pace Sam sets against your dripping cunt.
Rutting into the mattress to find the prefect friction hoping to ease for a moment the throbbing of his cock. “Stop stealing all those pretty noises Barnes I wanna hear our girl,” reaching up to smack the other mans thigh hard enough to break the two of you apart.
“Sorry not sorry,” giving him a smirk while licking his lips from the heated kiss.
Filing away the fact Bucky knows what means only to have any thought fly from your mind as two thick fingers enter your quivering channel. Slowly thrusting, his mouth suctioned onto your clit, drawing little short patterns making your thighs shake around his head. Slacking off to lazily place kisses over those thighs but still pumping his fingers, crooking them into a come hither motion to brush over that special spongy spot.
Blooming stars behind your tightly closed eyes, “Watch him doll, see how much you loves devouring that pretty cunt.” Voice rough with arousal against your ear, Bucky’s metal fingers dancing over your chest only adding to your heighten state of desire.
At his command you eyes open to lock with Sam’s passion blown blacken eyes. Moaning at the picture he presents you with, panting breath as you keep drawing closer to your orgasm. Only to have Sam back off creating frustrating tension in your body. Gritting out, “I’m going to die if you don’t let me cum.”
Smirk showing in those beloved eyes as he doubles down on your clit. Lips puffy but forming a perfect O too suction and flick his tongue over the engorged nerve bundle. Fingers, third added to stretch you open and picking the pace up as your mouth drops wide in a scream Bucky devours with a deep kiss. To keep from waking the kids or Sarah, his own body on fire with a need to have you both.
Tingles quickly dancing through your veins, breath panting as you break from Bucky’s mouth, one hand gripping the sheets below the other still buried in his hair. Body on fire as you near that perfect orgasm Sam’s intent on giving you.
Denial’s not just a river in Egypt as your eyes pop open at the knock on your door. Reminiscent of what your sluggish brain comes to understand as just a very vivid dream. One that makes your heart drop with the book that’d lay on your chest now face down on the carpeted floor. You stand checking the time of mid night before heading to the door and finding Sarah on the other side with ice cream in hand.
“Figured you might need some cheering up,” letting her in and taking the bowl of your favorite ice cream.
Vivid dream lingering though you don’t share feeling a TMI moment she doesn’t and most likely wouldn’t want to know about her big brother. You steer the topics away from the non existent love life to plans for tomorrow and the coming weekend.
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Pairing- Bucky Barnes x F! reader (Y/N)
Word Count- 1971
Warnings- canon typical violence, angst, hospitals, language
Summary- Y/N is a top notch agent that left SHIELD years ago on not so great of terms. Now she is forced to go back and face the past, including a blue-eyed someone she used to call her best friend.
A/N- Here’s an angsty little something I cooked up to vent. Based loosely on some real life issue and events. I truly wrote this for myself to help deal with things. It’s a five part mini series.
Let me know if you’d like to be added to the tags
Part 1- 2029
Timing. Timing was everything. Sure strength, finesse, and strategy were important too. But without the proper timing, all of those traits were a waste.
Crouched against a wall, you watched chips of it blown away by gunfire aimed at your head. Buying time, you waited for the right moment to return fire. You were outnumbered and low on ammo. Back-up was somewhere on another floor of the building currently trying their best to not get killed by this onslaught. Despite the odds, you felt comfortable under the pressure, almost at home. A natural state of adrenaline you had become accustomed to over your many years as an agent.
Noticing the slight decrease in shots being fired in your direction, you decided to act. This was the timing you had perfected. Pulling the pin from the grenade you had been holding, you swung your body just far enough around the corner to lob it at your attackers. Quickly, you brought your body back behind the wall before the explosion rumbled the floor.
Not a second later you brought your entire body out from cover holding your Glock and took aim at the remaining bodies that still moved. After firing six shots, you scanned the debris for any more movement. Counting the 8 bodies that lined the floor, you kept your gun at the ready.
Spinning quickly at the sound of footsteps approaching you from behind, you saw your back up team had finally arrived.
“You guys missed all the fun,” you quipped as you lowered your weapon.
“We tried to get up here as quickly as possible. They had fifteen down there,” Luca, your second, tried to justify.
“Yeah and there’s four of you. I had eight. On my own!” You emphasized.
“This is why you are in command,” Luca flattered.
You simply huffed in return. Holstering your weapon, you started to give commands to the rest of the team to begin the clean-up and sweep for any remaining threats.
As you began to discuss the events in a quick recap with Luca, a woman you recognized approached holding out a phone in her hand.
“Excuse me Ms. Y/L/N. I’m sorry for the interruption but this call was placed as urgent to get through to you,” the woman said as she offered the mobile device to you.
Grabbing it and taking a quick glance at the screen, you saw the number was stateside.
“This is Y/F/N Y/L/N,” you answered.
“Hey Flip, it’s Matt,” your brother addressed you with a nickname you had tried your entire life to escape.
“What’s up? I’m a little busy right now,” you begrudgingly asked, feeling a sense of dread creeping upon you for this unexpected phone call.
“It’s mom. She’s in the hospital. They think she had a stroke and possibly a heart attack as well.”
“Fuck. Are you with her? Which hospital?” You asked, your mind racing a million miles a minute.
“Yeah I’m here in the waiting room here at Albany Med,” he sobbed.
“Ok, I’m getting on the next flight home.”
Landing in La Guardia airport felt strange. It had been a little over five years since you had been home or anywhere close to the US. It wasn’t that you weren’t welcome here, but it was uncomfortable all the same. Knowing that the swipe of your passport would signal your arrival to members of your past.
After clearing immigration, you headed for the car rental booths and acquired an overpriced sedan, then started your drive to the hospital in Albany. You used the two hour drive to finish phone calls and ensure that business would run as usual in your absence.
Pulling into the hospital parking garage, you steeled yourself before stepping out of the car and heading inside. You knew your family loved you and cared for you. But you had been absent for so long. Occasional phone calls and Christmas gifts to your niece and nephew were the extent of your existence in their lives.
Your move to Europe occurred seemingly out of nowhere and you never came close to explaining your sudden change to anyone in your family. Although you knew they’d never judge you, the fact remained that you were ashamed.
Now you felt like a coward for running out as you had without explanation and felt as though your approach to the waiting room was a move towards your reckoning. Making a quick stop at the nurses station to gain admittance, you walked through the barren white halls towards the ICU waiting area. There you saw your brother slumped in a chair sipping what you assumed was coffee from a white styrofoam cup.
Sensing a new presence, he turned slowly to look up at you.
“Hey Flip,” he greeted with a strained smile before standing.
“Hey Hoot,” you returned as you fell into him for a hug. “How is she?”
A month had passed since your return home and your mother had shown minimal improvement. While she had been moved out of the ICU, she still required constant care and was not considered completely stable from a medical standpoint.
You were doing your best to manage your team back in Spain as best as you could but it was becoming more and more difficult. Although you were their command, you were still a field agent. And it was pretty hard to be in the field with them when you were thousands of miles away.
Splitting your time between the hospital and your hotel room also wasn’t allowing for the best lifestyle. Your brother had offered up a room in his house, but it meant putting his two teen children together in a room and you felt bad enough having them deal with their ghost of an aunt. As such you had been living out of a Motel 6 not far from Albany Medical where your mother was still being cared for.
During your stay, you had become a frequent customer at the local Starbucks located on the ground floor of the hospital. The coffee was obviously better than anything your hotel had to offer and it provided a decent work space during the time you weren’t in the room with your mom.
At the counter, you were greeted by Kenny, your regular barista.
“Good morning dear. The usual?” he quizzed.
“Good morning Kenny. Yes, venti Latte please,” you answered as you reached forward with your card to pay.
“I got this one,” you heard the man behind you say as a metal hand reached from behind you, placing money on the counter
Knowing that hand from anywhere you spun around and met the ocean blue eyes staring at you.
“I heard you were back in town,” he smiled at you.
“This isn’t exactly close to town Bucky,” you countered as he grabbed his change from the counter.
“No, but it’s the closest you’ve been in a while,” he argued.
“What are you doing here?” You quizzed knowing he had ulterior motives.
“Came to share my support for your mom,” he answered smoothly.
“A card would have sufficed,” you muttered as you grabbed your latte off the counter and headed for the exit. “I’ll give her your regards.”
Following you out into the parking lot, Bucky called out as he jogged a short distance to catch up with you, “Y/N, wait. I really am sorry to hear about your mom. But can we sit down and talk for a minute?”
“There’s nothing we need to talk about Bucky.”
“There is. I...I think we could help each other out right now,” he offered.
“Are you fucking serious right now? You think I need your help? Or that somehow I’m willing to offer mine to you? Are you high?” you bellowed at him.
“Can we not do this here in a parking lot?” He pleaded.
“You’re the one following me. I’m trying to get to my hotel.”
“Y/N, I know how sick she is and that you need to be here to help. I also know your employer isn’t going to allow you to maintain this current situation under their payroll much longer,” he laid out for you as you fumbled for the keys to your car.
“I don’t give a rat's ass what you do and do not know. I don’t want anything you have to offer,” you hissed, turning back to face him and sticking a finger in his face.
“Do you really hate me that much after all this time?” he inquired.
“Yes. Yes I do. You ruined my life Bucky,” you stated with as steady of a voice as you could manage. “So please, leave me alone. Whatever you have on the table, you can shove it up your ass. I want nothing from you,” you seethed as you finally opened your car door and got inside, slamming the door shut behind you.
Pulling out of the spot, you sped away as quickly as you could before he could see the tears that broke free.
You knew this would happen. Somehow Bucky Barnes would find you. He always did. And he would complicate the shit out of everything you held dear.
A week later you got the call from your boss. Although they tried to be accommodating and understanding, they needed you back with the team in person. However, with your mother still in uncertain waters and your brother having to support his own family, you couldn’t leave yet. So you allowed them to terminate your employment on good terms in which they offered you a small severance package for the work you had achieved.
Unsure of what your next step was, you focused your energy on helping your mom with her physical therapy and spent time sitting and talking with her each day. Although it was hard seeing your mom in her current state, it was nice spending the time with her after all these years. She was slowly starting to talk again and regain control of her left side. But progress was slow and frustrating.
After a particularly long day spent with numerous doctors and therapists, you were walking out to the car your brother had loaned you to see a figure leaning against the hood.
“Barnes couldn’t hack another attack from me so they sent you?” You accused the man.
“Good to see you too Y/N,” Nick Fury greeted you.
“Look, I already told Bucky, I do not want whatever you guys are offering,” you reiterated.
“You haven’t even heard what we have to offer,” he countered. “And from that I’m told, you need employment. More than that, we can provide the best medical care available for your mother.”
“Her care here is fine, Nick. And I’ll figure out my own job situation. Just like I did before.”
You had started to walk away when he told you the offer, “You’d be head of strategy and planning, oversee 15 special units, including training. You could live at the tower, we’d offer a signing bonus. And your mom could move into the medical bay where she would receive the most high tech and modern treatment available for stroke patients.”
You stopped in your tracks and turned to face him.
“You know it’s a good offer. And that it's better than anything you’d ever be given overseas,” Fury reminded you.
“What about Bucky?” You asked.
“What about him? Are you going to let him stand in your way?” He challenged you.
You stood there for a moment to weigh the pros and cons. It was a great offer. A dream offer. But it would mean swallowing your pride to return to the place and the people that had betrayed you all those years ago.
With a sigh you asked him, “When do I start?”
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