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thebubblesareevil · 1 year

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Family grows, it evolves…

Part 1, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5

There was a new exhibit on Ancient Greece at the museum, and as the resident expert Diana was given free range of the exhibit. Normally this wouldn’t be an issue, normally the League doesn’t find a clone of one of its founding members and spend a, frankly, ridiculous amount of time deciding how to proceed.

Diana sighed as she looked at the large room filled with artifacts needing to be catalogued before display. She lamented not having the same speed as the flash for but a moment before getting to work. It was 5:00, if she wanted to get any sleep tonight, she needed to get to work.

She steadily made her way through stacks of paperwork, working with the efficiency that was drilled into her since birth. It had been hours since she began her work, and though she tired, she resolved to head home to get changed for the next day. It wasn’t until she made her way from the basement that she realized something was off. Doris was sitting at reception, though she should have left at 8:00, the sun was still high in the sky, not yet ready to make its decent.

“Calling it an early night, Diana?” Doris asked “Big day tomorrow! Finally setting up the new exhibit. I can’t wait to take the kids, they’re so excited to see it.” She said with a wide smile. Diana surveyed the desk, catching a glance the clock. There in bold numbers and as 7:00pm, she smiled as she replied.

“I finished things up sooner than planned, so I thought I’d head out for the night. I need to get dinner started before my guest arrives.” Doris’ face nearly split in two.

“A guest, is he handsome, oh how could you hold out on me Diana!?” She said excitedly “I need all the details!” Diana laughed.

“Nothing like that, my Grandfather decided to pop in for a surprise visit. I haven’t seen him in quite some time, so it’s a lovely surprise.” Doris nodded along.

“You’re a good grandkid. I miss my grandparents everyday, you never know how much time you’ve got.” She said with a sigh. “Have a good night!”

“All the time in the world.” She said to herself, checking her watch and grinning. It read 4:30 am, she yawned as she left, making her way back to her apartment.

Everything thing was silent when she arrived, though that was to be expected at this point. She wade her way to the kitchen passing by the figure on the couch.

“Would you like some tea? Do you drink at all?” She inquired.

“I am perfectly capable, though I rarely indulge.” He replied in a monotone voice, if she had been anyone else she like would not have caught the edge of sadness clinging to his voice. Diana set the kettle on the stove and made her way over to the couch.

“Something troubles you, something big enough to approach me after all these years.” Clockwork smiled “You’re much sharper than your father ever was” the smile dropped.

“You are aware of the multiverse.” He said, Diana nodded. “As the Master of time, I bear witness to each world, each time line. There exists a world where humans built a bridge to the Infinite Realms, creating a being both born and killed by the infinite.” Diana gave him her upmost attention. “Sometime ago I was tasked with the elimination of this creature, this child, to prevent the tragedy he would bring upon that world.” He smiled “I was never one to listen to orders though, and instead I set the boy on a path that would bring about great change… it had unexpected side effects.”

“What kind of side effects?” Diana asked, worried.

“He began to cling to me, seeking me out for advice. I even found him asleep in my clock tower more than once. I have admittedly come to see him as my grandson.” Clockwork have a soft smile “He reminded me so much of you when we first met.” He sighed “I am here to ask a favor, young Danny is approaching a crossroads. There are two possible paths his timeline might take, one where he lives of the rest of his years moving between living in dead, his truth hidden from those who wish him harm. However there is another path, one I fear is becoming more and more likely than the last.” Diana had never seen her grandfather look so old, his entire form shifting to match his tone.

“What is it? What is going to happen?” Clockwork looked at her with sad, tired eyes.

“He will be betrayed, from this betrayal he will suffer such agony that the Realms themselves will retaliate. Then he will sleep eternal, bound to the infinite. His world destroyed.” Diana gasped. She placed a hand over his,

“What do you need me to do?” She asked firmly.

“Should the worst come about, I intend to steal him away from that world. Cutting off its connection to the realms permanently. However he is a being of both life and death, he cannot neglect his human half. What I ask of you is this, that you allow this boy to stay here, with you. There is no one else I would trust with such a task.” Diana hesitated.

She was a warrior, trained for battle from birth. She knew nothing of caring for a child. She thought her grandfather intended for her assist him in battle but this…. She looked at her grandfather, his sad eyes resigned, as though he expected her to refuse.

“Very well, on one condition.”

“Anything my dear.” She smiled.

“You must visit more, when last we met I told you I needed time. You gave me that, now I ask once more for time, time spent together.” She nearly jumped as his form shifted to that of a child.

“Nothing would please me more.”

“And grandfather? Should the worst not pass, I would still like to meet tho cousin of mine.” Clockwork froze, before he practically melted.

“Of course.” His form shifted once more to that of a young adult. Diana smiled pulling her grandfather into a hug.

“Thank you.” He whispered and he was gone. The kettle screamed. Diana got ready for a long nights rest.

—————————

A week passed before she heard anything from her grandfather. It was to the night before the opening of her new exhibit and she expected everything to go as planned. Just as she was picking out what she was going to wear to the gala, the sound of cars outside her window stopped.

“What do you think? Red or black?” She asked as she turned around holding the two dresses. Her grandfather stood tall, a stern look on his face. Diana set down the dresses. “It happened, didn’t it?” Clockwork nodded. Making his way towards the living room he stopped by the couch. There, asleep on her couch was a young teen, not much older than some of her teammates protégés. He had pitch black hair and pale skin, with lightning scars crawling up his neck. He chest did not move.

“He’s not breathing!” She turned to her grandfather, but he appeared unbothered. He smiled, watching the boy sleep.

“As I said before, he is a being of both life and death, sometime pieces of one form bleed into the other.” He turned to Diana, “He needs his rest, as for your first question, the blue dress will suit you much better on this occasion.” Diana gave him a soft smile.

“Come, I shall make us some tea while you tell me more about my cousin.” Clockwork nodded, taking a moment to readjust the blanket around the teen, before heading to the kitchen.

——————-

When Danny woke, to the sound of people talking he had a horrid migraine. He did his best to ignore the pain as he tried to remember where he was. The last thing he remembered was a dream of his parents yelling and the GIW knocking down their door. He slowly sat up, looking around the room, every wall was covered in pictures. Danny slowly stood and made his way over to the pictures. They all took place over varied times, ranging from, at the earliest, the 1920s all the way to the 2000s. All of the featured the same woman, she remained unchanged even as those around her grew old.

He listen to the voices, one familiar, one not, as he made his way towards the source of the noise. When he opened the door he was greeted by the familiar face of Clockwork. Next to him was the woman from the photos just as unchanged.

“Good afternoon Danny, did you rest well?” Danny did his best to disguise his flinch at the sound, grinning at the old ghost.

“Just fine thanks, what….what exactly happened? Where are we?” Confusion dripping from his voice.

Clockwork looked Danny in the eye, what he said next nearly broke him.

“I’m so sorry, Danny.”

Danny’s legs almost gave out under him. “It happened didn’t it? They tried to turn me in, to the GIW. That wasn’t a dream.” The ancient stayed silent, Danny's eyes went wide. "Is Jazz okay!? She... she was upstairs... if they hurt her!" Clockwork stopped him.

"Your sister is fine, they were only there for you." Danny took a deep breath, trying to process everything.

"So what comes next? Where are we?" Clockwork looked at him with a deep sadness.

"We are in a world separate from your own, connected by the Infinite Realms. I saw the possibility of what was to come and made arrangements. Due to the crimes of your world against you, the Observants and myself decided the best course of action would be to remove you from your world, and cut the living off from the Infinite Realms entirely." Danny looked down, resigned to knowledge of what they planned to do to him. "As you know, as a half-ghost you must tend to both sides of your being." Clockwork turned to the woman, "Danny, this is my granddaughter, Princess Diana of Themascyra. She has agreed to have you stay here, with her." Danny frowned.

"Your granddaughter? But she's...uhh" he paused, not sure how to continue. Diana laughed.

"Alive? Yes, I do believe I am. I'm assuming my grandfather has neglected to explain his past life" Danny nodded "How much do you know of the stories Ancient Greece?"

"More than most I think, there are a lot of constellations named after the myths. That and it's hard to visit Pandora and NOT get an hour lecture on Greece" Diana's eyes went wide.

"You know Lady Pandora? How wonderful, I grew up hearing stories of her bravery!” She smiled “That being said, that will make things a bit easier. My mother is Hippolyta, her desire to have a daughter was so great that she molded me from sand, Zeus, king of the gods, used his power to give me life.” Danny blinked once, then twice.

“So…you’re a Demi-god? I don’t understand how that makes you Clockworks granddaughter.” Diana smiled. “I mean, I know Clockwork probably used to be Chronos, Jazz and I had a whole debate about that, but what does that have to do with Zeus?” Diana smiled patiently.

“Danny, Chronos is the primordial god of time, yes?” Danny nodded “Okay, well he is also the primordial form of Kronos, the father of Zeus, my father.” Danny froze, looking over to Clockwork who merely nodded, as though Danny’s brain was currently trying to shut down. After a moment the dots finally seemed to click.

“YOU ATE YOUR KIDS?!?!”

Clockwork sighed, Diana laughed, Danny had a mental breakdown.

It took close to five minutes for Clockwork to fully explain as Diana grinned in the background drinking her tea. Once he calmed down, Clockwork finished continued expaining.

"As for your ghostly half, I will be providing plenty of ectoplasm for you to eat as well as bringing you to the Infinite realms each week until you learn to create portals of your own." Danny nodded.

"What about school? Or hell, anything really. I don't exist in this world, how exactly do I go about doing anything?" Clockwork smiled.

"I called on the power of the ghost writer for any legal documents and I personally filed them in the proper time period to ensure you have what you need. I have given those to Diana" she nodded "as well as giving her legal custody of you. As far as the law is concerned you are her recently orphaned cousin. Son of her estranged Uncle Haiden and Aunt Penelope, who tragically died a few days ago." Clockwork smiled, rising from his seat.

"I'm afraid I have over stayed my welcome, I think it's best I take my leave and allow the two of you time to acquaint yourselves better." Danny stopped Clockwork, giving him a hug he whispered.

"Thank you." Clockwork gently carded his fingers through his hair before stepping back.

"If either of you need anything, just ask." and he was gone. Suddenly there was an influx of noise coming from outside, just enough to tell them that the world outside was moving once more.

Danny stood awkwardly by the chair their grandfather was occupying.

"You know, I don't bite." Diana said, trying to break the ice.

"I do." Danny replied on reflex, before covering his mouth. He looked at Diana, she looked back before they both burst out in peals of laughter.

"This is so weird, what even is my life?" Diana wiped a tear from her eye.

"Well, considering one of my teammates dresses up as a bat and beats up criminals, while another talks to fish, I think it's safe to say neither of our lives can be considered normal." Danny broke out in another fit of laughter.

"No shit?" he asked. Diana lifted a single brow at the term.

"No shit."

"What kind of team are you on exactly? Extreme cosplaying? Underwater battle royale?" Diana smirked.

"How about we get you some food and I tell you all about it?"

Danny smiled "Sounds like a plan."

@a-salty-sal@impulsiveasshole@meira-3919@alcorbearson@cute6troll@samgirl98@skulld3mort-1fan@addie-lover-of-stories@amercurio@chronicallyonline-fandomwh0r3 @heirxofxtime @gin2212 @thegatorsgoose@wanderer-of-worlds@terzatheunderscorerima@bright-shade@satanicrutialspecialist@mur-ururu@birdie-24-05@ascetic-orange@cyber-geist@thatrandomsarahchick

#ho boy definitely cross posting #diana of themiscyra #diana prince #danny phantom #dc x dp #clockwork #its going on ao3 #no ships right now #maybe later maybe not #is there an easier way to make a tag list?!#dp demi-god au

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theomnicode · 2 years

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That scene when they say there' no such things as absolutes, but only "if you're talking about "people" and they show Saitama... That must mean anything man

Hah I was just gonna get into that because we all share the same braincell here on tumblr when it comes to OPM it seems.

New arc, New struggles; Dealing with dehumanization and emotions

Dehumanization starts when you see people as lesser beings. Not capable of feeling pain and hurt, not having empathy for them, even if they are simply worn down by everyday struggles.

Worn down to the point of exhaustion from being too empathetic and too compassionate. From feeling too much compassion fatigue.

So what would happen if...for instance, Saitama started to get too fed up with how the world is going around him and really, REALLY started to struggle as empathetic person?

There are apparently people going without housing because rich elites are buying them since HA need funds. Sickening corporate greed.

Random robots looked like they tried to attack him and then he almost got into 9 billion yen debt EACH (60million usd, which is frankly so insane it has to be exaggerated). That would be enough to financially cripple him for the rest of his life if word got out.

Other heroes probably coming around his house and having preconceptions about him, that he's rude, lazy and other kinds of awful persona when he's not. Someone or something gave him access to A-class while he didn't do much anything, shooting past slew of other heroes and breeding discontent and envy towards Saitama. A PR disaster in general, one that may get something even more added to it if what he did on the moon gets out. Then heroes being taken advantage of is abuse of power on itself.

The environment outside still being a wreck. Saitama's house is probably very sparsely furnished and little items in it because he can't afford anything. Dark, urban, enclosed and packed environment with no sunlight I may add is not very good for someone who frequently walks outside in the sun and who's chosen apartment was an empty ghost town higher up so he has a decent view from his balcony.

Just lack of sunlight alone is enough to de-vitalize a person and cause depression. People living in the northern parts of the world perpetually suffer from seasonal depression just from lack of sunlight.

Not being in touch with nature is generally bad for empathic person, because they need the serenity nature offers to them.

They need the escape from the world around them and decompress in the safety of their own home. Home which won't really even feel like homely and welcoming anymore, it will feel unfamiliar, cold and foreign and impossible to relax in.

Sparsely itemized, he only managed to scourge a frying pan and couple hangers and a broken Game boy. And even that left Saitama feeling like he personally wronged King for not taking good care of his possessions and then not feeling like inviting him over for playing, because the negative emotions would just accumulate. So he declined and pushed King away and distanced himself emotionally.

But having less people around him is even worse for him if he remains in such an environment in solitude. Social connections and especially emotional connections are really important for empathic person to be able to decompress and not get overwhelmed.

All this creates A TON of emotional stress. Empathic people will feel this even more keenly than the rest.

So, what will happen if Saitama is too fed up, because apparently, he's being more attuned to his emotions lately and more impulsive and holding himself back less? Less inhibition. And become more depressed from all the shit things going around him and the shit environment he's thrust into, with no fault from his own?

He'll start to make mistakes, react in anger and resentment at the perceived slights against him and even tiny things become more and more irritating. Moody, irritable, impulsive, what have you. If he has no way to decompress and emotionally vent, all those feelings will just start to pile up. He has learned that he can vent by hitting stuff.

Coincidentally, the chapter name is "The Cruel Staircase"

Someone will notice if he will go around trying to defend himself and acting up because he's going to be feeling like shit, because everything is going to shit, everyone else feels like shit and even the place he lives in is shit.

He himself will also notice and will also start to think of himself as monster. Because feeling pissed and reacting in anger and everything only gets him into trouble and into deep shit. If he accidentally hurts other people, especially those he cares about, he'll truly feel like he's a horrible person and feel like it's unsafe to be around him.

Someone will also notice he's housing monsters. At some point.

Dehumanization, aka the cognitive dissonance of monsterization. What it truly means to be a monster? Are Saitama's emotions monstrous? Is divine power monstrous then?

Integrated AI has massive capacity to learn, but machines are not humans and so do not have a shred of empathy. They just do what their AI tells them to do and what they learn to do.

That special sensor is probably capable of learning of Saitama's divine power. It is the same power that monsters use. That Saitama just used to defend himself and other monsters who happened to be with him.

Once the AI learns to correlate divine power = monster = human form...

Damn straight Black S.

Saitama and his monkey paws.

(Which is even funnier because Black S is pretending to be a monkey and he's the one who said he has a bad feeling ahaha I love this writer)

Future plot point unfolding in front of our very eyes.

But also, the dehumanization will be on point. If Saitama defends himself against an aggressor or simply expressing his emotions or even empathy for other people, he will be made to feel like he's the villain, he's the monster and the bad guy and will be deemed danger to society. He will have to fight against cognitive bias of fading compassion when there are more and more people he needs to help. It will breed cynicism and at worst, misantrophy.

Caped Baldy is in for a rough time when the depths of his emotional intelligence and his empathy will be tested. In the harshest environment possible.

It is time for the Hellish Training arc.

(The shitter's clogged yo or maybe someone's toilet is leaking because they had enough of humanity's shit. Someone who talks through people like they're in a bathroom or something...)

#opm #one punch man #saitama #opm spoilers #opm meta #empathy #dehumanization #compassion fatigue #emotional struggle #asks #opm manga panels

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booksforkidsonline · 1 year

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Appreciate Your Kids with Quotes Coloring Book

While it is a relaxation to watch kids, parenting is not that fun. It involves times when you feel frustrated, desperate, overwhelmed, and have reacted before you could think it through. It's all part of the game. But if you can train yourself to act with intentionality, you will feel better about your choices and be grateful for the results. Every parent wishes their child to develop into a decent, self-confident human being. But how do we achieve it? In her famous book "Start with the Heart," Dr. Kathy Koch talks about strategies to motivate your kids to be compassionate, responsible, and brave [1]. Dr. Kathy says that there are no quick fixes, and it's all about consistent efforts to motivate your kids and change what they believe to change how they act ultimately. It's indeed a long journey to move your child from "I can't, I won't" to "I can, I will, and I did." Books like "All Done Day: How to Win at Everyday Parenting" [2], "There's No Such Thing as a Bad Kid" [3], and "Raising Good Humans" [4] detail the approaches to mindful parenting and how to break free from reactive parenting to cooperative parenting.

As Dr. Kathy says in her book, the confident self-image of your kid comes from small changes that you inculcate in their everyday lives. Inspirational quotes effectively mould kids' thought processes and direct their energies towards a positive path. Constantly feeding the subconscious with a flow of positive commands can create a fantastic uplift in your kid's behaviour, personality, and success. We all have benefited from a quick and timely burst of energy from motivational quotes that help us get our focus back, offering the inspiration needed for the day or occasion. It is not just adults, but kids need motivation too, whether they are struggling at school, having friendship woes, or need some encouragement to believe in themselves. Finding appropriate motivational quotes for kids can be a struggle. To make this task easy for parents, we have compiled a list of inspirational quotes for kids in our coloring book "The powerful you" [5]. Positive affirmations should not be introduced as a chore to kids. Let them enjoy the process of self-transformation. We have complemented the quotes collection with beautiful illustrations so that kids make affirmations a fun practice [6]. They could turn each of these quotes into a piece of artwork for their room and be reminded of their unlimited potential whenever they feel down. These quotes cover most of the common life events and situations kids will have to work through.

Let your kids appreciate the value of little gifts in their life, the power of gratitude, kindness, and love. Let them develop confidence in their abilities, trust that they have inborn capabilities to drive them to greater heights and the potential to bring great changes to the world. Let them build a powerful self-image through simple steps every day. We would have heard quotes that remind us of the values of aiming higher, dreaming bigger, giving thanks, and helping each other. However old these quotes might be, they never lose relevance in your life.

#Positive affirmations #Quotes Coloring Book

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profoundtyrantharmony · 3 years

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Title : That’s How I Feel

Warning : None. Italics means flashback. Y/f/c => your favorite color. Y/f/sc => your favorite summer clothe.

Words : around 2260

Painting : Loki x Black!Chubby!Reader

Requested by @rootbeergoddess “Can you write a story where a chubby, brown skinned reader is dating Loki and Loki decides to spoil her one day by taking her to the mall and buying her everything she wants?��

My name is y/f/n y/l/n, I’m a young adult living in 21th century. You wonder why I would say that ? Simple. I’m a woman, black and chubby, and apparently in this era this is a huge problem. I didn’t do anything wrong, I mean yeah I love good food and I’m not overly fond of any kind of sport but is this really enough of a reason to basically bully me everyday. Let me answer this basic question : HELL NO !!! I’m pissed of all this bad comments about my appearance, what I should do to lose weight, to eat healthier… I can’t stand the fact that we are being judge (yes because of course I’m far from being the only one) based on our looks rather than our sharpe mind. I know my worth, and I am far more worthy than all of these piece of…garbage…those wanabe decent human. Right now I seem like I am incredibly confident but I’m not. I’m alone in my room talking to myself in my head because I am not capable of doing it in front of my bullies !! You wanna know what happened for me to be alone instead of happilly working ? Let me tell you a story…

I live in a cute two bedrooms appartment not far from the Avengers quarter (I’d say 20 minutes on foot). It’s a charming place, the neighbors are the nicest and most of all not judgmental. I live alone but sometimes my boyfriend come to spend the night at my house, those are the best night that could happen. But today I woke up alone in my king size bed, unfortunatelly for me he had an important meeting early this morning so he had to go early. His name is Loki of Asgard heir to the crown of Jotunheim, adoptive son of Odin, brother of Thor and most importantly the Holder of my heart. It’s been 4-5 months that we are actually together but we’ve known each other for about one year. We met at the Avengers compound where I worked as an assistant for Pepper Potts before I became the analyst that I am today, but that’s a story for another time. As I was saying I woke up alone this morning, it was 8:30 am. I’m not due to work until 10:00 am. I decided to take my breakfast while mentally visualise what I will do to work, whilst thinking about how to avoid my mescreants of co-workers (you read it right co-workers not collegues, I’m not appreciate enough to call them that, I only consider Bonnie a collegue, she’s the closest thing I have to a friend at work. ). Once my coffe and my toasts spread with honey were eaten I went to to the bathroom to prepare myself. The most difficult part for me is to chose what I am going to wear if I don’t want any comments. The purpose is to clearly become invisible, like a shadow lurking in the corner of the room. I don’t want to wear a cute dress, a fluffy skirt or a top with some lacework on it cause i will 100% receive insults, mockery, and I just don’t have the strengh anymore, it already happened before it will happened again I can’t do anything to stop it. I already try when I was younger and guess what “it’s just words don’t listen to them”, thanks a lot I feel better now ! I finally decided on a simple dark tight blue jeans and a white shirt with an afro motif on it (just like me). I put some liner and mascara and I was ready to face my personal hell. I went to work on foot, it was sunny with a bit of fresh wind, perfect for 20 minutes of walk. I arrived at exactly 9:50 am, and went to my desk to begin with my daily task. It took time and mental energy cause i’m a bit perfectionnist. My boss knows of that fact and are still satisfied with me because my work is ALWAYS perfect and NEVER need rework, the fact that I won the award of the best employee last year and this year too is something that didn’t escape me. That’s why I went to the communal area to get some tea and a chocolate and pistachio cookie, I really needed it. Just before I arrived I heard my name being said, and clearly not in a friendly way. I stayed hidden in the corridor to listen to what was being said. I recognised the voice of five persons (three men and two women, all agents of shield), they were talking about how fat I am, how ugly I am, how my clothes are too tight and not meant for me. But if it was only about my body it would be just like usual, nothing to worry about, but they were talking about my personnality (low confidence, shy, discret) and about Loki, and that, I couldn’t stand it ! How dare they insult him after all he has done for humanity, for shield, for them, only to be treated as a lesser man, it’s absolutelly despicable. Understanding that whatever I could do I will never be enough for them made me sad and angry at myself. I didn’t wanna eat anymore and decided to quit work for the day (don’t worry I informed Pepper) and get back home and stay alone in my bedroom, laying on my dark green new bedsheets.

I stay alone like this for quite some time until I hear the familiar voice of my tender one.

“I came as fast as I could, Pepper warned me you left work early what happened ?” He seems so worried, I don’t want him to see me as a weak little human even if I know that he doesn’t see me like that at all.

“Don’t worry it’s nothing. Lets talk about something else, how was the meeting ?” He was looking at me as if he could read me, maybe he can, he is too cute, look at his face, his eyes, his…sad smile ? What happen to him ? “Why the sad face Loki ?”

“I’m not sad, I know what you’re going through on a personnal level trust me, plus there is no such thing as secrecy when you work with and for the Avengers and shield. I know what those pathetic little things called humans have said about you, your collegue Bonnie was close to the area when she heard them, she called them on their bullshit (has been insulted short after) and came to Pepper who then came to me right after.” He come to sit beside me, his face coming closer to mine, his hands taking my face in his, our forehead touches, our eyes getting close, we breath each other’s in, it was so calm and tender. “The things you make me feel princess, I don’t think you understand the power you have over me that’s insane !” His smile when he said this makes my tears almost came free. We kissed each other slowly with a lot of passion until we stop to breath.

“I just don’t understand why they are so mean with me, yes I’m black but I can’t change that, yes I’m chubby but i’m don’t have cardiac problems, cholesterol issues or diabete, I walk everyday to go to work, I’m as healthy as I can be and those buffons can go to hell because I’m so freaking smart that they can’t understand how wonderful I am !!”

“You have a lot of confidence in you princess so why don’t you use it at work ?”

“You mean why I do not take the lead ? You mean taking the lead the same way I take it last time we were together in bed ?” I was trying so hard to change the topic of conversation but that was vain.

“Hmm you’re being a naughty girl don’t play this game right now I’m being serious.”

“You’re no fun !! Well, when I’m with you I feel respected, love. I trust you the way i never have thought I could. You never judge me and you make me feel whole, you’re the first person I see myself with for the long term, you’re the one for me and I hope you will love me for the rest of our time.” Tears were flowing from his eyes, he takes me in his arms and kisses me for all his worth. The moans that come out of my mouth was like a fuel to him, he could never stop loving me. “Come with me princess, we’re going shopping !”

The road to the mall was short cause we live close by and we took the car. It was still pretty early in the afternoon, maybe 3:00 pm si we had all the time we wanted, we were not in a hurry. When he parked the car I still didn’t know why we came here.

“Why did we came here Loki ?” I asked him.

“I have some items to purchase Princess.” He says with with a smile that could bright the entire universe.

“How many items do you have to purchase?” He smirked at me, and calmly told me :

“A healthy amount”.

We entered the mall, I didn’t know what to look for, it’s been so many time i didn’t come here, work kept me grounded in a way. I always asked one of my neighbors to do my shopping in exchange of some petsitting (when hollidays comes, familly week-end…it’s better than abandonment if you ask me). There were so many things I’d like to buy but I didn’t do it. Loki was leading to the litterature corner of the mall, I remembered that my favorite author just published a book days ago but didn’t purchase it. Without a word, he took the book and paid for it, I know he loves reading maybe he is a y/f/a’s fan. We looked at each other, smiling.

“Where do you want to go now ?

"I heard about the new summer collection, I’d like to go and check it out of that’s okay with you princess.” How could I ever refuse this face. He took my hand in his and lead me to the summer clothes sections. There were to many wonderful skirts, dresses I couldn'tstop looking at them…but would I ever be worthy of wearing them…

“Princess what do you think about this gorgeous y/f/c y/f/sc ? I think it will compliment your figure and make your pop more.”

“Why would you wanna buy it ? That’s not exactly what you would wear my sweet.”

“It’s not for me” he said laughing, “That’s for you !”

“…But why ?” I was shocked.

“Why would I want to spoiled the best thing that ever happened to me you mean ? Because I can and most importantly I want to do it. I want you to see yourself as I see you. I want you to feel self confident enough to allowed yourself to wear whatever you want without feeling self concious. And above all I want to please you as the Princess tou deserve. So I’m asking you, will you let me buy you books, clothes, make up, knits…”

“How do you know about the knits ?” I asked interumpting him.

“It doesn’t matter, I know that you knit some tiny socks and caps for orphans babies, that you don’t tell to anyone cause you don’t brag about the good thing you do because that’s not who you are and I love you all the more for it. You take so much care about people you don’t even know but never about you. I’m here to change it I’m here to take care of you the way you won’t do.”

“Loki…I..I..Thanks you”. I was crying my soul out. It wasn’t from sadness but from hapiness, i couldn’t describe the amount of love I felt for him this right moment. We hugged each other, the time stopped around us and we were floating like two leaves dancing with the wind.

“Lets go eat something, I saw a french backery at the other end of the mall.”

“Good idea, I didn’t eat since breakfast so I’m a little bit starving.” I happilly answered.

“There is a lot of choices princess, croissant, paint au chocolat, chicolate chips cookie…a millefeuille…” he was undecided.

“Why not take the four and split, this way de could taste and eat a bit of everything.” I told him, secretly hopping he’d say yes, cause, lets be honnest here, french food was literally my péché mignon (*cute sin/guilty pleasure*). He was more than happy with this idea, and more than happy to share his food with me. We talked a lot, purchase many other items, especially a bouquet of several flowers ( bouton d'or for joy ; white camellias for the eternal love ; fuchsias for unbreakable love ; gardenias for honesty ; lavender for respect and tenderness, last flowers but not the least the white roses for pure love). I was so overwelmed with joy that I couldn’t contain my tears.

“What did I do to deserve all this Loki ?” I asked crying.

“There is no reason really…” he looked me in the eyes and I saw all the love pouring into them as he continued “…that’s how I feel.”

*This is the end of my first fic, hope you liked it, remember, english is not my mother tongue so there might be some mistakes.*

*If you want to request check out here*

*Likes, Comments and Reblogs are also appreciated*

#loki x reader #loki laufeyson #loki laufeyson x you #loki x you #reader insert #black!reader #loki x black!reader #chubby reader #oc character #black!chubby!reader #loki x black!chubby!reader #fluff #fanfiction

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honeybunnybeez · 3 years

Note

Duuuude. Sfw alphabet for Eret or Bad??? Or even Fundy. All very underrated and I need see much content for them -⚰️

SFW alphabet:

C!BadBoyHalo:

♡Reader is Gender Neutral!

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

Bad is pretty affectionate when it comes to you, almost never leaving your side if he can.

He's very affectionate physically and verbally, clinging to you and giving you kisses while calling you sickly sweet pet names and praising you. Despite what he's supposed to be, he's incredibly adorable and hard to resist.

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

The friendship starts after you're introduced to him thanks to Skeppy, who you met first around the server and clicked well with. After getting to know you better and seeing you get along great with Skeppy, he easily accepts you as one of his close friends.

As a best friend he's kinda clingy, often wanting to see you and knowing what you're up to. He also likes to make sure you're okay and comes to visit you often, making sure no one messes with you.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

Cuddles are his jam and given the opportunity you two would probably never leave the bed for the whole day. He doesn't have a set cuddling style, though one thing stays the same and it's that he wraps his arms around you pretty tight.

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

He does seem like the type to want to settle down. It sounds like a very nice thing to do once everything in the server calms down, well, if it ever does calm down.

Domestic life wise, he's pretty decent at it! His best chore is cooking, he makes a pretty good meal when he cooks.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

Depending on the situation and what led up to it, I think it'd end on good terms but he would get very emotional while doing so. He would be crying while apologizing and explaining why he feels like a romantic relationship wouldn't work as to not hurt you too severely. He still wants you to be in his life as his best friend though so you two do keep in close contact if you're okay with that.

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

He is rather loyal and commited to the ones he loves so I think he would get married. Maybe after being together for 6 months or a year would be when he pops the question.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

He is very physically and emotionally gentle with you, not wanting to hurt you in any way.

Sure he does tackle hug you in his human form but in his demon form with his tall height he makes sure to treat you like glass if he ever handles or holds you.

Emotionally he doesn't ever want to say mean things to you. He always apologizes profusely (almost crying himself) if you ever get truly upset with something he teased you about.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

Loves hugs, the moment he sees you he's running up to give you a big old hug. Hug him back, please. Please, (y/n). Hug him back, he wants you to.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

He used to say it quite often back when you two were friends, so there's no exact way to tell when the I love you's started to be genuine.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

Lord above, we've seen this man be jealous. He's super jealous when you start to spend more time with others. Can and will blow up your communicator asking you where you are and who you're with. Sometimes Skeppy joins in too half jokingly. If you're with Quackity you bet your ass you're getting dragged somewhere far away from the man.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

Loves giving you surprise kisses and half expects you to return the gesture. ESKIMO KISSES! All the eskimo kisses, he loves them. He love giving and receiving eskimo kisses from you so much.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

Oh he adores kids quite a bit. Innocent, active and still full of life, he thinks they're precious. Though he can't really handle the spoiled ones, the ones who scream and throw really bad tantrums when they don't get what they want in the supermarket.

I don't think he's capable of having his own kids with his partner (being a demon and all) but he'd like to adopt one or two if you're into that idea. He's had experience raising Sapnap (and he doesn't hate bad's guts as far as I remember) so he's sure he can handle it.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

Before you wake up he likes to stare at your peaceful face while you rest. At first you did get a bit surprised when you wake up to see a pair of dimly glowing eyes staring back at you so closely. Now, you just instinctively reach out to give him morning kisses when you wake up.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

He holds you in his arms while you slowly drift off to sleep. Sometimes he hums a soft happy tune while playing with your hair as your eyes grow heavy.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

Skeppy totally tells you a few of Bad's secrets before you two started dating, only very minor ones though. Other than that, he's a pretty open book and if there was a secret he has he spills pretty easily when you say his name in a dissapointed tone.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

Unless you insult him or swear like a sailor on purpose to annoy him, he has a good bit of patience with you and your shenanigans. If you're best friends with Skeppy then you're bound to get into a little bit of trouble.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

He remembers things about you quite well. Such as what you like to eat, what your favourite ore is, your schedule, etc.

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

He loves you and he loves his best friend Skeppy too. He enjoys every moment you guys are all together but his favourite moment was when you three all hung out with one another watching the sunset on the roof of your home. It was all so unsually calm during those few minutes. You 3 totally held hands, just saying.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

He knows you can hold your own but even so he does get pretty defensive when others try to threaten you. Will stab a person for you if they really hurt you, no hesitation.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

He puts in a lot of effort to make you and everyone happy! It doesn't always feel like a chore when he's trying to find something you like or helping you around here and there. Anniversaries with him are simple but they're very sweet and memorable.

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

Oh boy, his clinginess and jealousy does tend to be a bit of a problem. You have to remind him that you need personal time too. He always pouts when you say that and often times you do give in because of it. Though, if you really do need to be somewhere without him, promise to spend your next free day with him and he'll happily agree.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

Not very concerned, he's aware that he looks a lot different than others but he doesn't think it matters when almost everyone in the server is a different kind of human or hybrid. Everyone's different and that's normal, he thinks.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

Sure we know that Skeppy is his whole heart both metaphorically and literally in a sense, but he would be devastated if anything were to happen to you. He would feel like a part of him is missing and it would frustrate and upset him to no end knowing that the missing piece could never be found again.

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

In his 9'6 form he will carry you around in his arms like a doll just to tease you. He think you look adorable as you whine and tell him that you aren't a toy to haul around.

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

He wouldn't like someone who takes advantage of him or does things he doesn't like consistently on purpose. Like, teasing him is fine, he does that too, but don't do what he doesn't like on purpose everytime you see him. He just thinks that's disrespectful even if you were just teasing.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

When he sleep he's absolutely wrapped around you. Laying by your side, arms and legs wrapped around your torso and waist respectively. You are his pillow now and you're being held hostage until he's decided he's satisfied.

A/N: Hey ⚰! Thank you for the request! I have to admit it was a little hard not to make it reference poly!c!skephalo because of how often its referenced that Bad and Skeppy are close to one another. (Someone please give me an excuse to remake this with poly!c!skephalo-) Anyways, I hope you all enjoyed reading this!

(Requests are open and anon is on!)

#mcyt x reader #mcyt imagine #mcyt headcanons #dream smp x reader #dream smp imagine #dream smp headcanon #badboyhalo x reader #⚰ anon

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blueink2k · 3 years

Text

Propaganda in Death Note and How It Played Into Light’s God Complex

[This is based on information from the anime, as I have yet to read the manga for myself. Caps from or references to the manga may be included to emphasize points or provide visuals, but the version of the plot I'm referring to is taken from the anime.]

Light Yagami does not pick up the Death Note knowing he’s going to use it to commit mass murder and become the God of his New World.

Actually, he does the opposite. He kills someone to test it as he’s under the impression it isn’t real, convinces himself it was a freak coincidence, and decides to try it out in a way that will provide a more concrete conclusion. When it does end up working he’s stunned, to say the least.

“I killed them both...I killed two men. Those were human lives. I-It won’t be overlooked. Besides, who am I to pass judgment on others?”

Light Yagami, the perfect, straight-A, model student, has just confirmed he killed two people using some strange supernatural notebook that just happened to fall into his hands. He’s always believed strongly in his morals. He’s been on course his whole life to join the police force like his father an deliver justice, and here he is, an indirect murderer.

So what does he do about it?

...He comes up with a reason to justify himself.

The people he killed were criminals. Mere scum who do nothing but rot and infect the world. Wouldn’t everyone be better off without them? It isn’t that he’s never considered this before, he has, albeit not to the same degree as taking their deaths into his own hands. But now that he has the power to do so, why shouldn’t he? He’s smart, he’s determined. He’s capable of it.

In fact, in his mind, he’s the only one who is.

He’s kind of right. He’s the top of his class, he comes out on top in national tests, he barely even has to try. Plus, he’s the only one that has a Death Note, and therefore the power to do this.

At this point in time, he doesn’t consider himself a god. He doesn’t want to rule the world, he just wants to change it. Something else important to note is that he doesn’t refer to himself as Kira or anything other than Light.

...That is, until...

Websites start popping up all over claiming that whoever this mass murderer is is named “Kira”, a god among men risen to punish criminals and save the world.

Two things to note here;

Apparently, “Kira” is returning, meaning there must have been some kind of previous belief in an entity that either did something similar to Light or had the same beliefs. There isn’t any other canon mention of a previous Kira, and this in and of itself is pretty vague, but given that there’s tons of religions in real life that have never had a big breakthrough, it’s reasonable to believe this could be something similar. That, or a creepypasta. Or a cult.

Light created this understanding that he had to be the one to change the world to cope with his murders. Actually - that might be the worst way to put it, since we know how strongly he feels about justice and being given an outlet to carry out this wish of world peace just enhanced this, but nonetheless... It’s impossible to assume he’s doing all of this without even a speck of guilt. Therefore, this is the first hint of appreciation or even just acknowledgement that what he’s doing is right.

Disregarding the first point (as interesting as I find it), this is really the first time Light is ever told what he’s doing is good. His own father - who he idolizes -considers Kira evil. His sister flat out says she hates him. Of course, this is all after Kira actually does become popular, but still, all he receives from that point on is disapproval from the people he cares the most about. The online love for Kira is all he has.

So, yeah, he probably internalizes it.

He thinks he’s doing the right thing. He thinks he’s giving others justice. He thinks he’s the only one who can do this. Others agreeing is only enhancing this. They’re the ones who call him God.

As the story progresses, Kira’s power and popularity grows. He gains direct news coverage, people begin sending him names of people to kill, his following grows. So much so, that when someone gets a Death Note and figures out that must be what he’s using, their immediate response is to find a way to contact him.

Cue Misa Amane and Sakura TV.

Sakura TV is a news program known for its unreliability. Demegawa, the director, even says he’s willing to make things up for publicity. And that’s when the Second Kira tapes arrive.

This, however, is only the first encounter with Sakura TV.

After this, the only direct involvement the police has with it is in the Yotsuba arc, when it’s used to lure out Higuchi. Otherwise the program promotes Kira all on its own, even going so far as to create Kira’s Kingdom - half a scam for viewers’ money, half a way to get more people to see Kira as God. And it works. He gains a following of people who believe he will create a new, better world, and will even give themselves up to help him.

An example of this following is when a mob of followers attacks the SPK under Kira’s orders. They’re so quick to join in, and are even willing to put their names and faces on TV in trust that Kira will not kill them.

All of this publicity sparks fear in the general public. People begin fearing that if they do something wrong Kira will kill them, causing crime rates to drop nearly 70% over Kira’s 6 year reign, as well as completely stopping wars.

Demegawa is eventually killed. Other news programs begin scrambling to claim the voice of Kira, topped by NHN, where we are reintroduced to Kiyomi Takada as Kira’s spokeswoman as well as one of his greatest supporters.

Light, as much as he hates Sakura TV and NHN’s depictions of Kira, uses them to his advantage as much as he can.

But really, imagine what this is all doing to him.

At the beginning, he struggled with grasping what he was doing as right. His sense of justice, righteousness, and perfectness shattered by a single notebook. But this is perfect, he figures that if he really wants to fix the world, this is one surefire way to do it. And yeah, his family hates Kira, but online he’s worshiped as God. We already know he has a pretty decent ego, and all of this is doing nothing but fueling it.

To top it all off, as he continues with his killings, his following grows. More and more people begin to support him, every single day there’s news stations upon news stations covering his story, some negative, some positive. People from all over express admiration towards him, even the President of the United States sides with him. He is literally worshiped as Kira, as God.

This all makes it sounds like his god complex starts later in the series, so to clarify; no, he does not pick up the book with plans to become God, but the second people start fueling his ego, the more twisted his ideals and motivations become. He’s the only one who can fix this rotten world. He holds the power of a god in his hands, he does what only a god can do, and everyone treats him accordingly. He is Kira, he is God.

Between websites, news programs, and his cult-like following, Light had enough attention to feed into his ego for a lifetime. He was perfect pre-Death Note. Smart, charming, set for success. There never was a time where he was particularly not narcissistic, it was just that he only felt this way inside of himself. The way he presented to others? A perfect, cool guy persona with an - in all honesty - annoying prickly jerk hiding inside. But no one ever knew this, he never let them know, and because he was always naturally successful it was more of an expectation he just met rather than surpassed, so he wasn’t consistently praised and this incredible self-esteem wasn’t propped up by anyone but himself.

To cycle back to the title of this rant-essay-analysis-whatever you’d like to call it, I want to share some examples about exactly why I even classify this news coverage and whatnot of Kira as propaganda.

Kira’s supporters cause a riot at SPK HQ under Kira’s orders and Demegawa’s direction.

Mikami providing his insight as to why he supports Kira on television, openly promoting Kira and encouraging others to join him.

Takada announces her new role as Kira’s spokesperson on NHN.

Mikami uses his power as Kira to kill members of Kira’s Kingdom, supposed followers of Kira who have been using his publicity to gain money and attention.

Most of this doesn’t exactly look like your standard propaganda posters or news story, but it does fit the overall criteria;

Information from a biased viewpoint used to promote/publicize a certain view (accepting Kira as God)

Shows exclusively positive views on Kira

Assigns Kira positive adjectives and makes him appear as good (God, savior, messenger from Hell), never considering or showing the bad

Presenting only positive statistics (Light does this in his monologue where he brings up the 70% crime rate drop, and given there’s no way he could have calculated this on his own he likely got it from one of these media sources. Not that it’s incorrect, per se, but he does fail to mention how many innocent people he’s killed in order to do this.)

Appeals to regular, everyday people by talking about how he’s doing this for the betterment of the whole world. People who are directly affected by crime are also likely positively impacted by this.

Initiates and spreads fear by explaining how Kira only attacks those who do wrong.

In the end, Light’s personal descent into his god complex, as well as his effects on the world can be attributed to many things, but it would be a crime to ignore just how big of a role news and other types of media played in this without his direct input. To think, if Light had won and overtaken the police like he was going to, he’d have absolutely no problem stepping into his shoes as God. Everyone else already set the stage, he just had to get there first.

This is my first Death Note analysis, so please excuse any errors, I just watched the anime for the first time and am doing my best to piece together all of the plot and especially Light’s deep characterization the best I can. If I ever read the manga or find something new, chances are this will be updated. But as for now, it’s finally finished after a week or so of procrastinating. Thank you for reading if you got this far! <3

#death note #light yagami #kira #analysis #anime analysis #rant #essay #hitoshi demegawa #do people even care enough about him to have a tag #💀#death note anime #teru mikami #kiyomi takada #yagami light #mikami teru #takada kiyomi #long post #meta

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stars-trash-18 · 3 years

Text

Home lll

Ngl this was kind of a filler chapter. but it’s what I got, if anything this will give you more background on reader and the planet’s history.

Again please message me about corrections about anything, especially if I use anything gendered or with racial descriptions.

You did as promised, you delivered some crops and spare farming supplies. After that you turned your focus back home. You went about as normal, getting Attila to school, smoking meats, tanning hides, and prepping everything else for the monthly market. The town several miles from your ranch had a weekly market for smaller sales, but once a month they had a large fair to sell bulk items for better prices. It helped keep some income during the weeks coming in and when the fair happened it brought in tourists or larger buyers to bring in the bulk income for many of the families, including yours.

Over the years you had gained the reputation of being one of the better ranchers to buy livestock off of. You cared for them like they were your own children and made sure that everyone walked away with a decent price, whether or not you gained a profit or broke even.

Because of this the fair became one of the only markets you showed up to, you'd bring your products and had the city wives falling over themselves for the leather and furs, the galactic ranchers trying to outbid each other for whatever prized bull you brought with you, and the smaller families happy when you turned the wealthier business to them. Because, although you had a wider range of product than most other farmers, you made sure to make a sly comment about others like, "The Ferdorick's leather products are some of the finest, if you decide to buy from me i'm sure they'd make this hide into a wonderful jacket,".

Something you valued so much more than the core worlds was the community that surrounded the outer rim planet, in planets like Coruscant people walked by the needy everyday. But here if someone needed shelter or something to eat the locals would give it to them, whether they were one meal away from the same fate or not, they still extended a hand and gave what they could. They did it for you when you ran, when you first landed with Attila balanced on your shoulders wondering what to do it was the Ganoris' who set you up in their spare bedroom, the Ferdoricks who taught you how to tan hides and gave you your first 5 head of cattle, and the Actorias who gathered the materials and taught you how to build and thatch. You were a stranger who was more dangerous than they knew, but they extended their hands to you and you work so that you can prosper and help them too. So when the Armorer landed on your doorstep you wondered if it would be wrong to turn her away, because you were tired of seeing people.

You enjoyed chatting with those you knew, but seeing so many strangers more than once a month made your social batteries drain. But you reluctantly invited her in and sat across from her at your table as you went about preparing the morning coffee. Already preparing yourself for the long day ahead. She sat regaly for someone who was so weary weeks prior, she reminded you of the tall bamboo stalks from your ex’s estate with how she could go from being bent with stress to tall and strong. She only watched you carefully as you moved around your small kitchen and rested a hand onto the table, only moving it to say no when you offered her a mug.

“How can I help you today, is everything alright?” you inquired carefully, blowing the steam away to cool the sweet nectar of the gods.

“Everything is alright in our new home, it’s been a long time since we’ve been able to call anything that,” she receded, her voice filled with warmth at her family’s good fortune before she continued.

“I’m here to ask if you would be willing to help us again, we’d like to gain some income but don’t know how we’d be received by the community and we’d prefer to stay as hidden as possible,” she breathed a heavy sigh when she finished. You blinked at her owlishly for a moment before giving her a calming smile and leaned back in your chair.

“I’d be glad to help, from what little I know of Mandalorian culture your people are famous for their care of those they consider family and it’s the same here,” You paused to sip your coffee before further explaining, “ There’s a story that the natives tell, the natives that have been here long before space exploration, that this planet was steeped in war but over time as the war dragged on the blood spilled by the fallen started to poison it, causing more to die from starvation than battle itself,”

“They came to the agreement that to preserve themselves they had to merge, it took many years but finally there was peace and balance, they shared their knowledge with each other and valued cooperation and helping others and that has remained the same since, they are wary of outsiders but would still help them at any cost, because with all the bad in this galaxy they hope to heal it one person at a time,” you finished before pausing again in thought, “But don’t mistake the peace for weakness mandalorian, the people of this planet will still fight if it’s the last thing to do, because though they prefer peace if you threaten their homes and family they fight like you wouldn’t believe, now onto the business at hand,” you chimed as you pulled your datapad in front of you.

“That was insightful, all the same. We'd like it if one of our own accompanies you to the market so you can show them how this planet works,” She replied thoughtfully, tapping her fingertips onto the table briefly in thought. “We understand that there are a few threats to you at the monthly fair but Paz has volunteered to accompany you to help carry your goods and some of ours with the added benefit of protection, from what i’m told you’re more than capable but at this moment it is the only labor we can provide,” she clarified. “ We'll give you a percentage of our sales since by extension we’re using your reputation to do so and to compensate for you teaching Paz the ropes, because what he learns with you he’ll bring to us,” she further revealed.

You huffed a laugh before waving your hand at her, “nonsense, here knowledge is free and openly shared, I’ll send you the coordinates for the public libraries and can have Attila look out for your children if you ever decide to put them into the school, besides you have more mouths to feed than I do and I could frankly use an extra set of hands at the market so this will go towards you’re payment for the land,” you receded. The armorer jolted for a moment at your news, her breathing seeming to stutter for a moment before she straightened further.

“Very well I accept the terms, I must ask however why you show us such hospitality,” she prodded, you understood what she really meant. She was trying to find any ulterior motive, and you could see why with how the mandalorians have been treated throughout their history. So you only thought for a moment before answering her, setting your mug down and looking to the floor to try and keep the memories at bay.

“I was running from someone who wanted me dead and to take my son, I was an intelligence officer for the resistance during the war so I knew that this planet would be the safest and furthest away, when I got here all I had was a small bag with necessities and little Attila slung over my shoulders,” You breathed in heavily to try and build a wall around the memories that flashed into your mind, trying not to get thrown into an episode, “I had nothing, but the people here took care of us, they helped me and as the saying goes taught me to fish,” you smiled softly at the memory of the elderly patriarch of the Actorias lecturing you.

“So to repay them for their kindness is to pass it forward and no one is more deserving than the Mandalorians, you guys were really screwed over by history,” you finished with a slight chuckle and turning back to the mandalorian matriarch, who sat rigidly. She rose from her seat at the table and placed her arm over her chest and bowed slightly.

“That was all I needed so I’ll take my leave, but know that you have a clan of mandalorians in your debt, those who threaten you threaten us,” she said like a vow before she swiftly turned and walked out of your home. Using the jetpack you didn’t even notice light up as she took off back towards the bunker.

~~~~POV switch to earlier that week~~~~~~

“Paz you don’t have to be the one to accompany the rancher, we can send one of our more experienced merchants to better learn the trade,” The Armourer explained with a hand to the front of her helmet in exasperation.

“I know, but if you send me it’ll be better to gauge how the people would react to us, I can also provide security,” He stressed, adamant about being the one sent to learn.

“From what you told me they are their own security, you just find them attractive,” Din teased his brother playfully, earning an elbow to the side gap in his armor from Paz and a groan from the Armourer.

“Enough you two, Paz if you’re so enthralled with the rancher I’ll grant your request now both of you out,” she reprimanded before waving her tongs at them in dismissal so she wouldn’t have to deal with their childishness.

As they left Din passed his brother with one last jab, “try to learn a little Verde”.

#paz x reader #paz vizsla x reader #paz vizla imagine #paz vizla x reader #paz series #home series #home lll #paz vizsla

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chaoticallygray · 3 years

Note

Hi! How are you? Can I request a oneshot about Leopold from the Irregulars? Like that they get into some sort of an argument and the reader storms out, Leo chases after them and accidentally confesses? It's fine if you don't want to do it.

Requested by: Anon!

Hi!! I'm good I hope you're good too! Wasnt sure what gender or pronouns you wanted so I tried to stay general. Might have gone a bit overboard but go big or go home right?? I hope you like it anon even though I feel like I strayed a bit

It had been another day of running with the gang and solving another case given to them by Watson. It was also another day where Y/N felt utterly useless. It wasn't an entirely new feeling for them but with the added cases it felt like everyone had a part to play. Spike made sure everyone got along and always lighened up the room, Jesse had that whole psychic thing going on with her, Billy was the muscle, Bea was the leader and always had a plan, Leo was the brains, and Y/N was just... there. Y/N tried to help but was always told to stand aside. It never really seemed apparent that Y/N didn't do anything necessary to help on cases (not for a lack of trying) until earlier that day.

---

Leo, Y/N, and surprisingly Billy were tasked to find information on any and every poison that could be found in London as two women and a man had suddenly died in their homes and were all found with a note in their hands saying that the clock is ticking.

They'd been trying to solve this case for two days now and getting antsy. They were stuck.

"I'm going to go over there and see what I can find. I'm thinking they could have been injected something or someone poisoned their food." Leo said already grabbing three different books from the shelves and mumbling to himself.

Billy and Y/N looked at each other and shrugged. They were used to Leo being this odd when it came to books. It was his thing.

Heading in a different direction than Billy, Y/N started brainstorming letting their hand glide through some books until a book about botany caught her eye. Whenever Y/N could have more than an hour alone they liked to read. It's not really a secret but they have never mentioned it to the others especially now that Leo joined. He was so much smarter than Y/N and that was precisely what made him catch Y/N's attention when they were first introduced on the case with the missing babies.

Shaking their head and smiling fondly at the memory Y/N sighed. There was no way Leo would ever look twice at them. They weren't going to even entertain the thought. There was a case to solve.

Opening the book, Y/N realized that they had read this one before which was why it probably caught their eye in the first place. Closing it and going to place it back where it belonged Y/N remembered having read about a plant capable of causing respiratory problems and stopping the heart of anyone that touched it for merey a second. Quickly trying to find the page on the plant Y/N ran back to where Leo was looking like a madman with fifteen different books open around him.

"Leo!" Y/N exclaimed and then dropped their voice to a whisper remembering where they were with a blush.

"I think I've found it" Y/N whispered to Leo who wasnt paying attention.

"Yeah Y/N go ask Billy to read it for you. This is important" Leo said waving around a hand in dismissal not really listening to Y/N.

"What? No Leo I think I found what they were poisoned with." Y/N said confused by what he said about finding Billy.

"Y/N don't be ridiculous. Can you stop? I really need to find this" Leo said not even sparing Y/N a glance just continued flipping through different books.

"But Leo..." Y/N started protesting but was caught off by Leo slamming a book closed.

"Y/N stop it! I need silence to think and you going about whatever it is you think you found isn't helping. You never actually help us solve the cases so can you do me a favour and go look at a book with pictures or something while I find the poison and we can all get a decent nights sleep?" Leo told Y/N without even thinking about how he just basically called the one person who is always there for him and the one person he has been heavily crushing on since they met, useless.

Immediately standing up to apologize he didn't get the chance as Y/N whose lip was already trembling slammed the book they had in their hands onto Leo's chest where he already knew he was going to bruise but at this point he thought he deserved worse for hurting Y/N like that.

Running out of the room Y/N nearly collided with a confused Billy.

"Y/N? What's wrong?" Billy asked but was promptly ignored.

Billy looked back to Leo who had a kicked puppy look to him shocked at what he had said.

Shaking his head at Leo, Billy went outside to try to find one of his best friends with no such luck.

Y/N was already long gone.

---

Falling asleep miserable yet with no tears was something Y/N was not a stranger to. It had been happening too frequently now and at this point they're exhausted.

Y/N didn't go back to the cellar that day. Whenever they needed space to breathe and just br they always go to a surprisingly very empy not so much of an alleyway near the docks. There is a small nook int he corner where Y/N can sleep peacefully without unwanted company. For safety reasons Y/N only told Spike about this place in case the gang needed Y/N for something. So far, they hadn't.

It was precisely here that Leo found Y/N the next day. He had immediately wanted to run off after them but Billy told him to give them space. When Y/N didn't go back to the cellar that night well after the case was solved, Leo got concerned and started overthinking. He couldn't sleep and all he could think about was how he messed up. He was scared that Y/N didn't want to be friends anymore. Yes, he dreams about being more but he rather be friends than have nothing.

The next day when the rest woke up Leo was still sitting near the cellar doors waiting for Y/N to come back. He looked as though someone punched both his eyes.

"Mate why don't you go to sleep? Y/N will be back" Spike said trying to reassure him.

"I can't. I need to apologize. I didn't mean it I was just stressed." Leo said looking up at Spike, who had a hand on his shoulder, with wet and red eyes.

"Look mate, I'm only telling you this because I've seen you two. You're great together and the best thing is you don't realize you both like each other" Spike said sighing and then told Leo where Y/N was probably at.

Quickly thanking Spike, Leo wasted no time and ran as fast as he could out of the cellar doors on his way to make things right.

Arriving at the docks, Leo went to the left and tried to find the little alleyway Spike told him. Walking as quick as he could with his cane he finally spotted Y/N sitting on top of a wall just looking out at the water.

Stopping at the wall Leo took a second to admire Y/N. The sun was still low in the skyly but it was making Y/N's eyes shine and he had never seen then more serene than in that moment. He wished he could see that everyday and he hated to think that he was the reason why Y/N was upset enough that they didn't feel like they should have gone back to the cellar the day before.

"Are you here to call me useless again or are you just going to stare?" Y/N said without looking over at Leo who was momentarily startled out of his staring spell.

"I'm actually here to apologize." Leo answered.

"Save your breath Leo. You can go back and tell Bea or whoever sent you that I'm fine and I'll go back to the cellar later" Y/N said jumping off from the wall they were sat in and starting to walk away. Leo quickly trying to catch up with his limp.

"No one sent me I-" Leo started but was quickly cut off when Y/N sharply turned around to face him.

"Not surprising since I'm useless." Y/N said to Leo scoffing and turning around once again to continue on their journey with no destination.

"No Y/N listen please" Leo said but Y/N didn't care they just kept walking.

"Y/N" Leo kept trying with no luck.

Getting tired but not willing to stop, Leo tried to speed up but his leg thought that this was the best time to lock up and seize movement and he fell.

Hearing Leo's quick grunt of pain and a slight thud, Y/N turned around and seeing him groaning on the floor trying to get up quickly ran back to help him.

"No, no stop I deserve it." Leo said swatting away Y/N's hands.

Not listening to him Y/N got him in a sitting position. Rolling Leo's pant leg Y/N assessed the situation and didn't think he needed anything more than rest and something cold against his leg. Also less restricting clothes.

"Why are you helping me?" Leo croaked after a minute of looking at Y/N with tears in his eyes from the pain.

Y/N just looked at him and got a small tin from the bag they're always carrying.

Opening the tin and pushing some type of paste on their fingers, Y/N concentrated on applying a light and even coat on Leo's leg hoping the mixture would help soothe the pain.

"You're not useless." Leo said and Y/N hesitated for a second then went back to applying the salve not saying anything.

"I didn't mean what I said. I should have never said that to you. The case was taking so long and my leg was starting to bother me but Billy was there and I didn't want to say anything. I always slow us down. I was angry at myself. At my body and I took it out on the last person I ever wanted to hurt" Leo said closing his eyes willing himself not to cry.

Hearing no response just feeling light careful touches on his leg he continued spilling his thoughts.

"You're so brave and compassionate. You're so so smart and so kind. You always make sure that everyone has eaten and you always somehow know when one of us is having a bad day and you make it your mission to make us smile at least once. You're always polite and make sure to help anyone you see that needs help. You're so selfless Y/N. Always helping everyone and I wish I could help you and treat you like a queen but I'm always hurt and you deserve the world. You deserve someone who isn't afraid to climb a tree with you or even do something as simple as walking all over London. I can't be that and it pains me because I'm so in love with you and I'm so incredibly sorry for hurting you. All you do is help and I called you useless" Leo rambled hoping that Y/N will forgive him not even noticing that he slipped up and told them that he was in love with them.

Sensing that Y/N stopped their movements on his leg Leo opened his eyes thinking that Y/N left him. What he didn't expect was for Y/N to look at him with tears in their eyes.

"You, you're in love with me?" Y/N whispered scared that if they talked louder the moment will have turned out to be a dream.

Widening his eyes Leo finally realized what he said.

"No! I mean yes! I'm in love with you Y/N. I didn't mean to say that! I know you don't feel the same and I know you want someone stronger and not broken like I am but I can't help my feelings. It's ok though I'll leave. I'll leave you alone-" Leo was cut off from his nervous babble when a pair of lips pressed firmly to his.

Hesitantly pulling back from him, Y/N smiled softly at him not caring that they're still on the ground near the docks but needing to say this now.

"I'm in love with you too Leopold" Y/N said and with that Leo didn't care anymore about his leg that strangely enough had stopped hurting when Y/N started applying the salve but he saves that thought for later and focuses on how the person he thought he could never have loves him of all people.

"Are you sure?" Leo said placing both of his hands on Y/N cheeks wiping away a tear that seemed to have escaped from their eyes.

"Yeah I am. I love you" Y/N said looking into his eyes.

"I love you so much" Leo whispered before pulling in Y/N for another kiss.

#the irregulars one shot #the irregulars x reader #the irregulars #leopold #leo x reader

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theonceandfutureking6481 · 3 years

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BBC's Merlin Season 1 Episode 3: The Mark of Nimue Analysis

*SPOILERS FOR THE WHOLE SHOW*

First off I always look fondly on this episode, mainly for Morgana being hilarious and epic, I mean she has the best line in the whole episode:

Arthur: You could get hurt

Morgana: So could you.... if you don't get out of my way

This episode is also fun and interesting from the perspectives of plot, characters and themes. Sorry, this is extremely long, I have a lot of opinions about Merlin.

Gwen and Merlin

This episode is in many ways about Gwen and Merlin's friendship, it is the driving force behind all of Merlin's actions within this episode and is the stepping stone for this show considering how to find a balance between acting for the greater good without suggesting that the ends justify the means.

Merlin and Gwen are first off just very sweet, their friendship is really characteristic of this show's representation of friendship overall, just genuine love and consideration for others. It is also self-sacrificing, that's one thing about the relationships in this show they are so self-sacrificing.

When Merlin says to Gwen "I didn't like to see you upset." It reveals a wonderful fact of Merlin's characterisation that I would argue stays consistent for the whole show. His motivation is always grounded in how much he cares for the people around him. He cares deeply about his friends and they are largely his reason for doing the things he does. This line is a wonderful parallel to in season 3 when Merlin decides to let Morgana die (after he accidentally trips her down the stairs), but then in the end he heals her because he couldn't watch everyone's grief. Merlin cannot separate his actions from the people he's doing them for, and he can't stand to see people hurt when he has the power to fix it because the people he loves are his motivation, they are the reason he wants a better world. This show does establish (as I'll discuss further down) that what seems immediately right (healing Gwen's father etc) isn't necessarily the right decision to make for the greater good. This is some ways always questions the validity of Merlin's motivations and his actions, but I'd argue it more seeks to find a balance. Besides a Merlin who didn't act motivated by his love for others is not a Merlin that could have helped Arthur build Camelot.

Medievalism: duty and social obligation

Quick disclaimer cause I'm touching on a more scholarly issue here that I have limited knowledge of, so I will undoubtedly make mistakes and this is my opinion. Everything I write is my opinion, but that's more obvious when I'm commenting on the themes of a fictional world rather than making a comment on actual fields of study which is what I'm doing here.

BBC's Merlin is an example of medievalism, it is an engagement with the medieval era (or ideas/images associated with it) for modern times. I honestly don't know that much about medievalism, or the medieval era, certainly not enough to make an extensive commentary on its representation in Merlin. One thing I would argue is that Merlin's representation of friendship has its roots in idealised views of the virtues of the medieval era. For many people the Middle Ages represents a time of duty and social obligation, this on one hand does lead to a stringent class divide but it also finds its idealisation in the sort of friendship represented by Merlin. The premise in most societies that place great value on social obligation is that the needs of the community outweigh the needs of the individual, that people should sacrifice themselves for the community as a whole. Every society places emphasis on this in different ways and to greater or lesser extents and our view of it as being prevalent in the medieval era is largely an idealisation based in some historical reality but also our own desires about what this era represents. There is a kind of social responsibility in the relationships in Merlin, there is a great emphasis on loyalty which is part of this idealisation. However, Merlin makes it more personal than is often depicted. We idealise social responsibility and obligation, it is often tied into the social roles of people such as loyalty to a king, or paying back debts of honour which is a form of social obligation. Merlin is more about friendship, it takes our idealisation of medieval social obligation and makes it the obligation and loyalty we owe to people who love us and who we love. I will always say that fundamentally Merlin as a show is about love, and it emphasises what we owe to people in our lives in a way I believe echoes idealisation of medieval loyalty.

This idea can also be seen in Arthur's fundamental trust of others, his fundamental assumption that everyone around him is not seeking to harm him, and that people are generally good. This ties a bit into the idea of social obligation. Arthur's idealised world is one in which people have bonds of social obligation towards each other, that people are seeking to act in the interests of the community. It's an idealisation, both of the medieval era but also an idealisation in Arthur's own head of the world he lives in.

Morgana and Gwen

Their relationship is somewhat expanded on in this episode, and they are just so sweet. Gwen gives Morgana flowers to cheer her up and its just lovely. They have a very genuine and close relationship. Morgana also has great respect for Gwen, for the work she does, and she treats her with respect.

Morgana: "If she was a sorceress, why would she kneel on the cold stone floor every morning if she could make these things happen with a snap of her fingers, like an idle king."

Aside from being one of Morgana's many quality burns towards Uther, this also illustrates one of her greatest characteristics, her empathy and genuine respect and admiration for what Gwen does everyday. She doesn't see the class divide in the same way Uther sees it or Arthur pretends to see it.

Also interesting note I heard in a Merlin podcast (I can't remember which episode), it could have been the episode about this episode. It's called Destiny and Chicken (you can listen to it on Spotify and anywhere else you find podcasts- they even did an interview of Bradley James who plays Arthur at one point), and its very good. But, they said something interesting about the paralleling between the relationship between Merlin and Arthur and the relationship between Morgana and Gwen. Both are fundamentally important and genuinely caring relationships for the character. However, for Morgana and Gwen (unlike Merlin and Arthur) the class divide remains much more in place, Gwen treats Morgana like her friend but she also treats her like her mistress in a way Merlin just doesn't with Arthur (especially not so early in the show when he's not so admiring of Arthur). This isn't to say their relationship is bad or has problems, its just different whilst still acting as a parallel. I'm not sure exactly the extent to which I agree or what this says overall in themes but its definitely interesting to think about.

Uther: "A Good and Terrible King."

This episode shows Uther at both his best and his worst which is always fun because Uther is a genuinely interesting character. I got the line from my favourite Merlin fanfiction Coronation by rageprufrock, which you should definitely read, I'll link it down the bottom, it's not too long so you can read it in half an hour. It's a character study of Arthur more than anything else and its amazing, wonderful and deeply poetic. Uther is not a huge part of this fanfic, its about Arthur's character and his relationship with Merlin and his kingdom, I'm not even sure he actually appears. This line though perfectly tapped into how I always felt about Uther so it connected:

"He's been a good and terrible father, a good and terrible king."

I often think in characterising Uther we do tend to villainise him to an extent which I personally don't find accurate. This is obviously just my opinion, and I have a tendency to think the best of people so more intensely negative views of Uther are very jarring for me. He did terrible things and I truly believe he is the ultimate villain of the show but he is very human and he could be a good king and he loved his children more than anything else. We cheapen Merlin's point if we cast Uther as pure evil, everyone is capable of evil just as much as goodness. Uther is the tragedy (like Morgana) of a person who could have been good or at least halfway decent corrupted and destroyed by his own hate and ignorance. That's the point of the parallels between Uther and Morgana, we love Morgana and she was capable of so much good, but she corrupted herself with hate.

Onto this episode, Uther shows both his capability and goodness as a king in this episode as well as his hatred and ignorance. Uther's initial reaction to the fact that the plague is caused by magic is a concern about his own authority, which isn't entirely unfounded, but does reveal a huge priority of his which is control. He fears not being able to control, that's were his cruelty as a father comes from and to some extent his opposition to magic. This does not show Uther in the best light, but his actions later in regards to dealing with the plague show a decent king who cares about his people. This scene in which he tells Arthur to shut off the lower town perfectly illustrates this:

Arthur: But what about the people who live there

Uther: Don't you think I haven't considered it? What else can I do? I have to protect the rest of the city

In this situation Uther is right, there is very little other choice, he's making a hard call but it's one he has to make, and he seems genuinely distressed at having to make it. He does care about his people's well being, and he feels the burden of their protection, he can be a good King. Much of Arthur's story is in breaking away from the legacy of Uther, and rightly so, but Uther also taught him many things and one of those things is the duty Arthur has towards his people, it's a duty he takes even more seriously than Uther, but nonetheless he learnt it from him.

This however, as I've hinted, is not the whole story of this episode, Uther is also shown at his worst, and his worst is his ignorance and prejudice towards magic. He is willing to sacrifice justice and even sacrifices logical thought to his blind persistence that magic is evil.

Arthur: She's right Father. You hear the word magic you no longer listen.

Uther: You saw it for yourself, she used enchantments.

Arthur: Yes, maybe. To save her dying father, that doesn't make her guilty of creating a plague. One's the act of kindness, of love, the other of evil. I don't believe evil's in this girl's heart

Aside from what this says about Arthur. Arthur's comment about Uther hits right to the point of things "you hear the word magic you no longer listen". You no longer listen implies its a choice, and it is. Uther has made the choice for the last 20 years to choose to go on a dogmatic campaign of hate against magic because its easier than considering the alternative, that he was complicit in his wife's death. What Uther says immediately after "there are dark forces threatening this kingdom." is the argument used by so many people throughout history, used to justify so much hate. That there is an evil out there threatening the stability of life, that the world must be controlled and people have to live a certain way or risk destroying their own lives. It's an argument that justifies campaigns of hate and makes them personal to ordinary people who usually wouldn't care, and it is always a lie, that's not how the world works.

This episode thus shows Uther at his best and his worst, both a dutiful king and a stubborn tyrant. It's a tragedy of what he could of been, and shows how twisted up people can become when they justify their decisions with hate and fear.

Arthur

This is the first episode where Arthur really opposes Uther, he directly questions Uther's indiscriminate hatred of magic, and an episode where he realises to an extent he perhaps hadn't before some of the ways in which Uther has failed as a king. He also consciously acts in deception of Uther, because he can see Uther can't see sense. Arthur shows far more nuance of view than Uther does, understanding (even whilst still accepting as he will for a long time that magic is dangerous and it corrupts) that using magic doesn't make you automatically evil. To see the world the way Uther does is a conscious choice, you have to choose to be blind to the virtues of every apparent magic user you come across, you have to believe harmless spells are the signs of greater evil. Arthur is not someone who lets his own cowardice blind himself to reality, and so his worldview can see far more nuance than Uther can.

"One's the act of kindness, of love, the other of evil. I don't believe evil's in this girl's heart."

He further has a very positive view of others, Arthur will always see the good in people and that is a great strength in my view. In a lot of versions of the story Arthur's not just inspiring because he's good but because he assumes others are good too, he trusts people to do the right thing and I do believe that, that can inspire people to do the right thing. It's funny in Merlin Arthur's trust gets betrayed so many times but it never really hardens his heart, he continues to trust people no matter how many times he gets betrayed. This can be seen in his perception of Guinevere here, he will not assume she is evil because she has made a mistake, he can see the virtue in her actions, and he will assume goodness until proven otherwise. Innocent until proven guilty, in other words. It's its own form of justice, a justice Uther is forgetting, its a tenant of many legal systems and its a tenant Arthur clearly supports.

Arthur is also seeing his role as the king of Camelot in creating a Camelot that he would like to live in.

"Yes I am yet to be king, and I don't know what type of king I will be. But I do have a sense of the type of Camelot I would wish to live in. It would be where the punishment fits the crime."

It's not the Camelot he would wish to rule, its the Camelot he would wish to live in. Arthur wants to live in a just world, he wants his people to be treated with justice just as he would like to be treated with justice. This further illustrates that unlike Uther he is not letting anger or ignorance blind him to reality, he wants the world he lives in to be fair without exception.

Finding the Balance between The Greater Good and The Immediate Good

The Greater Good is a tricky concept, you can justify any amount of cruelty if it will lead to good later on, but do the ends justify the means? It's not really a question its ever possible to provide a definitive answer for. It's easy to say that they don't, that you should just do the right thing, the nice thing, the good thing in the moment but actions have consequences and doing the good thing all the time (especially in a position where thousands of lives depend on you) is not usually possible. Merlin tackles this theme, I believe, quite well, trying to find a balance between acting for the greater good and acting with what is immediately good, and this episode is a good example.

In a just and fair world you would be able to do good all the time, but this is not the case for everything, though you should never use the worlds not fair as an argument for not doing good things but I digress. Merlin's decision to save Gwen's father ultimately backfires on Gwen because the world is not fair, the world Uther has created mean even these acts of love are punishable with death. Because, for Uther, magic is magic, and magic is evil. Gaius was, in this situation, ultimately right, Merlin can't always do what is easy and what feels right because the consequences may not be good. In other matters like closing off the lower town, Arthur's initial response is concern for the people who live their, but Uther's right he has to make this one tough decision because otherwise he risks the whole city.

However, Uther's attitude to Gwen (aside from revealing his own stubbornness and prejudice) is an example of the greater good taken too far. He has absolutely no evidence that killing Gwen will stop this plague, but he's making that sacrifice anyway because it might, that is not justice or fair or anything resembling goodness. And he justifies his decisions with what I've already said is an age old argument- "These decisions must be made. There are dark forces threatening this kingdom." This is just another version of any easy choice, acting without regard to the greater good is an easy choice but so is ignoring what is immediately right in pursuit of some ambiguous goodness. He's confusing his own weakness and ignorance for strength.

The point Merlin is, I believe trying to make is that there must be a balance. Sometimes you have to pursue the greater good, but the ends don't really justify the means.

There is a reason Arthur and Merlin will create the Camelot of legend and Uther and Gaius don't, Merlin and Arthur aren't going to sacrifice their own goodness for the sake of the greater good. Merlin for one ensures Arthur never has to, its sad but Merlin in many ways makes the harsh and cruel decisions that Arthur never has to make. However, he also often doesn't make those decisions. He reaches a point where he wants to let people die, but he never actively attempts to kill Morgana or Mordred by himself unless it is an absolute in the moment choice between them and Arthur, and even though there is plenty of moral ambiguity about that and plenty of debates you can have about that. Fundamentally the point remains, Uther would have killed them and that's why he could never be the king Arthur would be or the influence for decency Merlin would be, the ends don't ever entirely justify the means. Besides if Merlin had thought that and killed Mordred and Morgana for their possible futures he would not have been the decent person he was and he could not have helped Arthur build a good Camelot, Camelot would not have existed if Merlin had acted entirely with the greater good in mind to ensure Camelot's future.

Other Stuff

Gwen's scene in the cell is so terribly sad, she's trying to be brave and her final request to Merlin is just so sad, "Remember me." She's so young and its the injustice and cruelty of Uther's kingdom that's condemning her, his own blindness to anything involving magic. We all want to be remembered don't we, especially when you die so young that you've barely had the chance to live. -----Also Guinevere will be remembered, she is a legend so there's something very bittersweet in this. She is not forgotten, then or ever

It's funny watching back to season 1, Merlin spends a lot of the time complaining about how Arthur will never recognise him for who he is. He wants recognition. But by the end of the show, yes of course he'd like recognition but he's learnt to just put up with never getting it. His priorities have changed so much.

There's this thing that happens a lot in season 1 and 2 (and I think a bit in season 3 but its less funny then) where Morgana persuades Arthur to do things by insulting him and its the funniest thing ever, and the first instance of it is here. I like to call these her 'epic sibling powers' cause they are just such siblings and its hilarious every time

"You are one side of the coin, Arthur is the other."- Kilgaharrah--> Just, yes.

Also when Arthur gets Merlin out of when Merlin confesses to being a sorcerer—> he's obviously making stuff up on the spot—> like he might sort of believe it (the stuff about Gwen) but fundamentally he's just trying to protect him without really knowing for sure why Merlin's lying

"One day people won't believe what an idiot you were."- Gaius--> Fun little nod to the audience who know Merlin of legend (as nothing like the BBC Merlin)

Also at this point we don't know why Uther really banned magic so there is an element of moral greyness to it all. We know magic's not evil, we know Uther went too far but at this point there is still a question about 'how too far' did he go?

Coronation by Rageprufrock (seriously read it. It's amazing): https://archiveofourown.org/works/5749

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random-thought-depository · 3 years

Text

The infamously corny Star Trek TOS episode The Omega Glory was on TV last night and I watched it. My ideas for how I’d rewrite it to make it less silly:

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The Yang ancestral culture wasn’t literally the USA, it was just a society that looked kind-of sort-of like the USA in the same way some pre-Columbian American and ancient Indian societies may have looked kind-of sort-of like ancient Athens. That by itself would make the episode much less stupid, and you could keep most of the same basic ideas.

Since we’re not bound to absurd levels of parallelism anymore, I’d personally be inclined to make the Kohms light-skinned blue-eyed blond(e)s and make the Yangs darker-skinned with darker hair and eyes, and imply that the Kohm ancestral society was fascist instead of communist. Maybe sprinkle some symbols distantly reminiscent of Nazi iconography around the Kohm village. It’s not like there was any meaningful connection between the Kohms and communism anyway, and I feel this resonates better with a lot of the ideas the episode was going for. Admittedly, this is probably influenced by my own biases.

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Basically swap the roles of Cloud Williams and his mostly silent female companion who doesn’t really do much.

Why? Let’s think about how Yang society might work for a moment. I’m going to say they’re horse-riding big game hunters, like the nineteenth century Great Plains native American cultures on Earth, because 1) that fits with the idea that they’ve been driven into marginal lands and had to become nomads, 2) if you want nomads capable of assembling armies of thousands of people it’s either that or Eurasian-style herders, 3) it fits with the “they’ve become like native Americans” idea. They’re very slow-aging, theoretically capable of living over a thousand years ... but if they’re like their precedent cultures on Earth they probably live fairly rough and dangerous lives and I think would probably tend to live only a few decades or centuries before dying in a hunting accident or battle or something like that. But... going by Earth precedent, it would probably be mostly the men who do the most high-risk activities of hunting and war, which might result in very gender-asymmetrical life expectancy patterns, where men tend to only live a few decades or centuries while women stay relatively safe and have a decent chance of living to be thousand year old ancients. This would be compounded by 1) a lower death rate would mean a lower birth rate for replacement rate reproduction, 2) they’re almost immune to infectious diseases, which would make childbirth in primitive conditions much safer, so that would greatly reduce the probable primary cause of death for women in such a society (childbirth complications). So I think it’s pretty plausible that they’d have a more-or-less matriarchal society where women have a lot of power because they live a lot longer and hence have a lot more time to accumulate experience and become repositories of culture (important for a low-tech nomadic society that will have a mostly oral culture!).

So, I’d gender-swap Cloud Williams; my version of her would a matriarch with a leadership position in her tribe because she’s one of its oldest able-bodied members, she’s got a thousand years of experience and she’s had time to memorize a lot of the oral histories of her tribe and become basically a living library. Why would such a person be anywhere near a battlefield? Well, “the oral histories of her tribe” would include a lot of war stories, with detailed and often basically accurate descriptions of tactics and strategy because that’s how knowledge of how to win wars against Kohms and rival Yang tribes is transmitted in her society. She’s a living tactical manual, so of course she leads her tribe’s warriors in battle.

She could have a companion who’s a big guy who doesn’t talk much and does the brute strength side of what in the episode is Cloud Williams’s role (fighting Kirk in the cell, ripping out the bars). Maybe he’s her grandson, and was captured with her because one of his roles in the tribe is to be her bodyguard in battle.

----

Related to what I just said, have a bit where Captain Tracey says that he expected the primitive and superstitious Yangs to be overawed by phasers, but instead it was almost like they have a recent cultural memory of war with modern weapons and war against technologically superior opponents and they quickly started using effective counter tactics. Given the explanation in the episode for the long lifespans of people on Omega IV (very strong selection pressure for disease resistance), none of the Yangs would actually remember the ancient high-tech Yang civilization and original war against the Kohms, but the generational transmission chains from a lot of presently living Yang matriarchs to that time might be relatively short. For a lot of the presently living Yang matriarchs shooting down Kohm helicopters with surface-to-air missiles and ambushing Kohm armored columns in mountain passes might be something like “my grandma’s time.”

----

The reason the “Eee Plab Neesta” sounds like gibberish is that Cloud Williams is reciting it in its archaic original language, which the living Yang language has evolved into mutual incomprehensibility with. The Yangs might have one lovingly preserved paper copy of their equivalent of the Declaration of Independence, but their culture is mostly oral, and they mostly preserve the “holy words” in the heads of the matriarchs, who memorize it and transmit it from mother to daughter exactly (“by heart”), being careful to get every syllable right so it does not become distorted. The oldest matriarchs can still speak the ancient language, but for most of the Yangs, especially the relatively short-lived men, it’s like me listening to somebody recite Beowulf in its original language.

This is more-or-less my headcanon for what’s going in the actual episode too: the “Eee Plab Neesta” is just the text in its original now archaic form of the Yang language, which the universal translator can’t translate because it doesn’t have a big enough sample to work on. I’d make that much more explicit though.

The way I’d handle the scene is to have Cloud Williams start to recite the Eee Plan Neesta, and then have Kirk ask her what it means and suggest that she try to translate it into the everyday language of the Yangs so all her people could hear it with understanding, and of course it wouldn’t be the actual Declaration of Independence but something different but with a similar spirit, something like this:

“We the people of these five colonies of the nation across the sea and seven nations of the original inhabitants of this land, establish a Union, which we found in and organize according to the following principles: that all people are equally precious, that laws exist by the consent of the people and to serve the people, that leaders serve the people and hold their offices by the consent of the people...”

Then have Kirk give his speech about how these words are meant for everyone and not just for chiefs and should be something shared among all the people and lived by and not something gatekept behind archaic language most people can’t understand. Have him reference the USA founding documents by saying that his world has something very similar and he knows from the history of his own world how world-changing these ideas can be and how precious they are.

----

Obviously you can’t do that “the Yangs try to find out if Kirk recognizes the holy words, and Kirk almost recognizes them but not quite” thing with this version, so the equivalent I propose is:

Kirk recognizes the original functions of Yang “holy relics,” i.e. relics from the ancient Yang civilization: one is part of a machine that once carried people through the air (it’s a snapped-off piece of a helicopter blade), one was a device for seeing far away things as if they’re near (it’s a broken pair of binoculars), one was a machine which people could use to talk to people who were beyond the horizon (it’s a broken-down cell phone), etc.. OK, the last thing is anachronistic for TOS, but if I were writing this as a fanfic it’s what I’d do.

Cloud Williams starts to recite a long epic poem the Yangs have that tells their entire history, to see if Kirk will recognize it. Of course Kirk doesn’t, but while the Yangs don’t have history books they do use visual textile art as an aid to memory and they’ve set up a big story cloth that depicts the narrative in the room and Kirk goes over to it and starts pointing to pictures on it and correctly interpreting them:

“Here, the Yangs were oppressed by kings. The Yangs rebelled and overthrew their kings and made a new nation that had no kings. After this the Yangs became very rich and very powerful, they built great cities. The lords of the Kohms were threatened by this and they used terrible weapons on the Yangs and invaded the Yang land with great armies. Here’s a Yang city being destroyed in an instant by a Kohm weapon. The Kohm lords were so threatened that they tried to destroy the Yangs’ whole way of life. The Yangs retreated to the bad lands and kept fighting. Here are Kohm flying machines attacking a Yang village, and a Yang warrior hiding behind a rock destroying one of those flying machines with a lance of fire. The Kohm lords couldn’t overcome the Yangs until they brought the Death Thirst to the Yang lands in a box and let it out. But that weapon had a life of its own, and turned against the Kohms, and almost destroyed them too. Only a few Yangs survived in the bad lands, and the Kohms claimed the good Yang lands and settled them. But the Yangs survived, they learned the bow and the lance, and eventually their numbers started to increase. The survivors lived longer than people had before; you interpreted this as a gift for the Yangs and curse on the Kohms by the Great Spirit, so that both might live to see you retake what was once yours. And little by little, you did retake what was once yours...”

----

One way to suggest the Enterprise crew making a positive difference on Omega IV at the end of the episode: have Kirk convince the Yangs to spare the Kohm civilians in that village.

The victorious Yangs are all set to give the last Kohms the Numbers 31 treatment, which is what they usually do when they overrun a Kohm community. Of course, Kirk is horrified by this, and he manages to use arguments involving the Yang “holy words” to convince the Yangs to be merciful instead. “Your own holy words say that every person is equally precious! Every person! That includes the Kohms too! If you really mean it, it includes the Kohms too! They’re no threat to you anymore! Did you fight for so long just for a chance to do to them what they tried to do to you? If so, how are you any better than them? Your own holy words claim to be for all people! Your own holy words say that all people are more alike than they are different, and all people are capable of appreciating the gift of freedom! If that’s true, then your holy words are for the Kohms too! That’s why the Kohm lords were so threatened by you, because they were afraid of what would happen if the Kohm people heard those powerful, good words! Tell the Kohms about your holy words!”

So Cloud Williams agrees to make a merciful and peaceful settlement with the “last of the Kohm places,” let it integrate peacefully into Yang society with no further bloodshed and no abuse inflicted or spoils taken. And then Kirk says “If you mean your words of freedom, your work didn’t end today, it’s just starting. Build good seaworthy boats that can cross the ocean, and send people to the Kohms across the sea, so they can hear your words of freedom too! The words of your ancestors are for them too! You’d never be able to conquer them, but they can hear your words!”

#Star Trek #fanfic ideas #cw: Nazis #kinda #cw: genocide #I read/watch something

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kingofthewilderwest · 3 years

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This hasn’t been a good year for me first I was stalked then I lost someone who I thought was a friend because my mental health issues caused me to impulsively lash out at people I been apologizing and apologizing they refuse to listen to me all they told me was get outside help. The thing is I was there for them when they needed me but when I needed them they abandon me I am autistic and have trouble regulating my emotions I explained that to them when they told me that I keep lashing out at people even after I apologize for it. :( what should I do? Should I just just keep spamming how sorry I am and that I will keep my mouth shut and not lash out at people anymore I just want them to like me again I don’t like lashing out at people I have no control over that why can’t they understand? How many times do I need to cry in their inbox until they realize how sorry I am and that this time I won’t lash out impulsively.

Hello, friend. <3 I'm really sorry for the struggle and pain you are going through. That's tough. My heart reaches out for you. I was in an extremely similar experience once (I'll talk about the experience and results below), so I both care about your situation, and I hope my message can help you with your choices moving forward. My phrasing might sound blunt, but every word is written with love, and I will give comfort through the end, so bear with me. Sorry that I suck at brief. XD

From the way you’ve described your situation, you’ve already been messaging friend(s) repeatedly explaining your actions, giving apologies, etc. My answer is under the assumption you’ve been sending repeated messages. Here’s the unfortunate kicker.

You need to stop messaging them. Period.

If you want them to feel better and feel better about you, you need to give them space for a decently long period of time without breaking that silence once, it doesn’t matter if your desired topic is helpfully explaining how you tick, apologizing, or talking about something entirely unrelated to the drama.

I know that's probably the hardest thing to do. I know for me, when I was in a situation like this, every fiber of my being *SCREAMED* at me to try to make things right by messaging again. I was so terrified I couldn’t leave it alone. I understand how scary it can be for someone to not listen to your apology. I understand the drive to get someone to understand your circumstance for why you messed up. I understand the overpowering pressure of guilt for having done something wrong and the itch to keep acting until I make it right. But you can't make it right by messaging someone repeatedly.

While your intent is reparation, your result is harassment. I'm so sorry to say this, but if you’re messaging like that, you are continuing to inflict pain and make matters worse because your constant messaging gives them no relief. It’s like constantly picking a scab to make it bleed again rather than letting it heal without touching it. If you pick that scab too much, you’ll lose more blood and you’ll get a scar. Lots of people, after being hurt, need time to process their emotions before they can be comfortable resuming a chill conversation. So long as you keep acting like this, they aren't going to want to listen to you, and your actions are going to make them wish they weren't around you. They’ll see you in a worse light because if you can’t give them time and space to heal themselves and you can’t stop fixating on past events, then they see that you’re not handling the situation well.

Now. If you do talk to them again, after that *LONG* break, there are several things you have to do. Ask if it’s okay to talk first and be clear it’ll be a one-time event. Be rational, be calm, be objective, accept responsibility for yourself without trashing yourself or sounding desperate for their response, and make sure you acknowledge their feelings and experiences as much as your own. Accept responsibility for yourself in your words. Make sure you listen to them, too, and respect their thoughts.

I know that’s hard to do. I can get scared, tongue-tied, and emotional in conversations like this. The way I get around that is writing down what I’m going to say beforehand. That way, I can spend several days carefully tweaking my words so they’re optimally diplomatic (and have someone else check me if I need a second perspective). Now I have a script I can follow that can prevent me from tumbling into babbling emotion. “I’m sorry, I’ll keep my mouth shut, I just want you to like me again” will turn more people away, unfortunately. People don’t trust that because it sounds like you don’t have control of yourself, which makes them think more bad things could happen. Level-headed but kind discussion of the issue is essential; it shows you are *capable* of handling the situation. Showing capability helps engender trust. Also, please make it clear to your friend(s) that once this convo is done, the goal is to move on.

Note that your friend can say “no” if you ask to talk. And that’s okay. If they say “no,” leave it at “no,” and don’t try to get a “yes.” Your friend can still say “no” to points you make during your conversation. Those aren’t the words you want to hear but you have to accept them if they come. Stay humble. Do not try to get them to fully be in sync with you because that may be impossible and only hurt everyone more. All you can do is present yourself at your best; after that, it is their choice how they respond, and their responses must be accepted. If they are bitches, that’s on them, and you’re better off not being friends with shitty-ass uncaring bitches. If they choose not to be friends with you for understandable reasons, it hurts, but it’s valid; we do not have to be friends with every person we meet, even if they’re cool. And if they choose to forgive you, which they could too, then you guys have a basis to move forward again without reopening cans of worms. I do want to reassure you: I’ve had plenty of conversations like this go well and friendships get repaired. <3 It can be done.

Now. You said you feel your friends aren’t helping you at your time of need. I understand the pain of supporting a friend but the friend doesn’t reciprocate at the time I need them most. This was hard for me to learn, but: a friend is not obligated to help you. Yes, good friends will help when they can. Yes, if you’re only helping them and they’re nevvvvvvver helping you, that’s a one-sided relationship and that’s a bust. But healthy relationships also have boundaries and “no”s. It’s not a contractual obligation to help a friend through everything. Plus, not everyone has the skillset to help you for every need. Friends who are not used to neurodivergence might not know how to handle neurodivergent-specific challenges (that’s what I’ve experienced with my own support networks). You can explain it and hopefully they’ll get better about understanding how you tick, though. There’s even types of friends who understand how you tick but still not want to be around it, and sometimes that’s because they have to protect their own health. They can understand you lash out but still need to leave to heal themselves because lashing out hurts them, and they don’t have the energy or emotions to help or listen to you right after. They have enough on their plate trying to keep themselves going without assisting someone else too. Those things can happen. You may find out what type of friends yours are later.

And I know it’s really hard to regulate emotions... I’m saying this as someone who had extreme issues regulating my emotions due to neurodivergence and mental illness, albeit of different kinds... but ultimately mental health is an explanation, not an excuse, and you are still responsible for the results when you are cognizant enough to act well enough. You are valid for being autistic and that is not a problem, that is who you are period, and if they don’t respect that, that’s their issue. Explaining why you act like you do is a first step. It’s good to communicate and I think it’s good you want to your friends to know why it’s hard. But you do have to work at getting better with your treatment of people, too. Sometimes we do things outside of our control. Sometimes these will never be in our control. But some things will be in our control. Part of our responsibility as a friend is to not just admit we hurt someone in the past when we’re at our worst and least controllable, but make an effort, as we can, to prevent these things in the future, as we can. Figure out prevention tactics. Figure out ways your friends can be equipped and prepared if something happens. Find professionals who can help you with emotional regulation. And so forth.

Your friends do have a point about getting outside help. I love supporting my friends and helping them through emotionally dark times, but sometimes a friend’s mental health struggles are out of my abilities and I can’t be expected to be the one to handle it. I cannot help my friend with heart surgery because I am not a heart surgeon; likewise, sometimes I can’t help my friends with mental illness ailments because I am not a professional psychologist. If it is within your budget, this may be a valuable resource for you that will help you, your friends, and more.

If you’re anything like I was, what I said may make you want to go into another round of apologizing, but before you do that (you shouldn't! you can't!!!!), I want to explain what happened to me. This involves me talking about the worst period of my life, the worst mistakes I ever made, and the worst legacy I'll have to contend with. I haven't talked about it on tumblr because I haven't wanted people to misread me or judge me, but the truth is, those old mistakes are a defining characteristic of my everyday life because of how thoroughly I fucked up and hurt someone else by my desire to "make things right."

I was eighteen and sharing a dorm room with my high school significant other. We broke up several months into the school year. At first things were okay, but then our friendship started to slide. We both did foolish things and wrongdoings against each other. The result was my ex needed breathing space to heal, whereas I felt I needed to heal by coming closer to them. As you can see, these are opposites, and it... didn’t work. It resulted in me pestering them and them wanting to get further from me.

I was also suicidal at the time. I had undiagnosed ADHD and rejection sensitive dysphoria and maybe more, and all that put me in the worst psychological state of my life. My emotions were more powerful than I could control. I had no coping mechanisms yet. My diary entries sometimes don’t sound... sane... from that time period. Being suicidal, I begged my ex for help, and my ex said “no”. My ex was rude and cold (understandable... hard to be polite when you’re stressed), but still, she had a right to say “no.” No one is obligated to do anything, but I was extremely emotional at her denial. Terrified for my life, I tried telling my ex that I had helped HER through HER problems when SHE was depressed, why the fuck wouldn’t she help me with my low point? I felt like she abandoned me and I told her so. I was intending to suggest she was breaking a promise and being an uncaring, unfaithful friend... but my words came out sounding like I was guilt tripping. My friend felt emotionally abused, forced into a situation where someone was threatening their life if she didn’t do what I said.

That’s a lot of pressure on someone, a roommate screaming at her that she had to do X or someone would die. It’s a cruel thing to shove someone into. I did that. I did it accidentally, my only intentions were making amends and saving my life, but I’m still 200% responsible for the results. It destroyed her psychologically, and ten years later, I don’t think she’s fully recovered.

When I recovered from the worst of my mental illness lapse, I felt sick to my stomach about how much my emotional responses harmed her. Thus began my rounds of apologizing. At first she coldly “tolerated” it, but I couldn’t leave it alone because it didn’t feel like closure. She outright told me she would never forgive me and that made me more desperate. About once every six months for the next three years, I tried talking to her. She felt harassed. She increasingly hated me. Soon, she thought I was stalking her, and sent the start of what could’ve become legal action against me. One time, I tried talking to her about something entirely unrelated (I was trying to save a friend who was having panic attacks and my ex was unknowingly responsible for the panic attacks), I panicked, I grabbed her arm, she threatened to call the police on me, had the teacher drive her home from class, and the next thing I knew, we were both in the university’s Office of Student Conduct. Oof.

And that’s just the tip of the iceberg.

For the rest of my life, I will have to contend with the fact I fucked up the person I loved the most, and that the best thing I could ever do to help her was... to... leave... her... be.

If I had let my friend breathe after my first apology, if I had given my friend space to process through her hurt emotions until she no longer felt hurt, we might have been able to rekindle a friendship. But I never gave her the time to heal. I never respected her “no, stop talking to me.” My apologies were intended to make her feel better because I knew I was hurting her, my apologies were intending to say “I’ll never hurt you again!” But instead I kept digging a deeper and deeper and deeper and deeper hole.

I realize this is a dismal story. I don’t want to scare you. I want you to read this private story of my pained heart to understand what happens when I let desperation do all the talking. I want to share it to show how much I care for your situation. And I want you to understand that... after I learned taking a step back... I had radically better results with the friends I got into conflicts with. It took a ton of effort and work to retrain my conduct, but it worked, and I’ve found stabler and happier and relatively drama-free relationships. And if I fuck up for some reason mental-health-wise, it’s usually a single conversation and done to get us back on track.

I fuck up, but I’ll never fuck up like that again, never ever EVER, nowhere CLOSE. And that’s a... happy ending in its own right, yeah?

I do believe in you. I believe that not every story has to end like the one between my ex and me. I want to give you that hope. I believe you have a good heart and you definitely want things better. You wouldn’t have messaged me (and I believe... others... on tumblr?) if this didn’t matter to you. And anyone who wants to do something about a problem has the starting kernel of Betterness happening. I believe you can find more peace. Maybe it won’t come right away and maybe there’ll be rocky points, but life can become better, relationships can become better. There are ways, even with mental health struggles, to find that comfortable equilibrium again.

I wish you the best, friend. Take care. <3 Rooting for you. I apologize if any of my words ended up coming out wrong accidentally. I really do hope you find some relief in this situation. <3

#long post #ask #ask me #non-dragons #don't mind me

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sevenstarsinning · 3 years

Text

Invasion Ch. 12

Description: A planet conquering race of Saiyans invaded Earth and deemed it worthy of habitation. After bringing the humans to their heels, they set up a new society where humans had one role, to serve. You found yourself in the unlucky faction of being bought and sold as a human pet. With absolutely no interest in owning a human but no way out of having one, Kakarot made a bid on you at the urging of his brother. It was only a matter of time before you were either killed or forced into obedience.

You can find previous chapters in this link: Ch.11 or you can read it here on my AO3

__________________________________

A routine developed for you, wake up, eat, meet with Gine to train, eat lunch, train more, eat dinner, heal any bruises and scrapes in the healing pod, then back to the palace. Bulma had left you alone for the most part, which was good because you really didn’t feel like explaining to her where you were going and what you were doing. That morning you finished your breakfast and opened your door to head out, but you ran smack into the one person you were just trying to avoid.

“Shit, sorry, Bulma.” You said as she took a step back.

“Where are you going in such a hurry?” She asked the question you were trying to avoid.

“Um, just out. I need some fresh air.” You lied.

She pushed her way into your room, “yeah, I understand that completely. Today is not going to be fun for anyone.”

You turned to face her with your brow furrowed, “why not?”

She stared blankly and confused at you, “you- today’s the trial for Kakarot. Did you forget?”

“Fuck. I didn’t even- I knew it was coming up, but I didn’t realize it was so soon.”

“Are you okay? You’ve been a little off lately.”

“Yeah, I’m fine. Um, the trial, you’ll let me know what happens?” You hoped to distract her from more questions.

“You do know that you’re expected to be there, right?” She continued to regard you as if you had a second head or something.

“Me? Why? I didn’t have anything to do with it.”

“Because Vegeta wants to show us off to his father and from now on you’re required to attend any event in the palace. But besides all of that, you love Kakarot, I thought you’d want to be there?”

“Loved,” you corrected, “he made it abundantly clear that it was just great sex.”

“I’m- I don’t know what to say here. You seem so careless about this?”

“No, I cared, I cared too much and ended up hurt. I can’t hold onto those feelings when they meant nothing to him. I’ll go to the trial because the last thing I need is Prince Dickhead angry at me, but I’m not going because of any assumed loyalty to Kakarot.” You felt bad for snapping at her, but you honestly didn’t have the capacity to show any sympathy anymore.

A heavy silence fell over the two of you as you stood there for a moment, “is there anything else I need to know?”

“Just be ready within the hour to meet with the King before the trial and I’d change your clothes if I were you. Also, Vegeta says we don’t speak unless spoken to and even then we probably shouldn’t speak.” Her expression had dropped from concern to one of sadness as she left the room.

You let out a frustrated sigh, wishing you’d said more to her or done something else to make her understand, but it was all too overwhelming and you honestly wanted to just forget everything and move forward, whatever direction that actually was.

Picking out a decent dress shouldn’t have been as hard as it was, but there you were with too many choices and honestly, not enough motivation to care. You grabbed the one that didn’t make you feel completely exposed, black silk with a low cut back. You threw your hair up in a semi-presentable bun and headed down to where you assumed Bulma and Vegeta would be.

You descended the stairs to the main hall to see the two of them standing next to one another as they waited a few feet away from the door.

“Cutting it close, human.” Vegeta snapped as soon as you were within earshot.

“Sorry, dresses aren’t my thing.” You shrugged.

“Clothing isn’t your thing, breeding isn’t your thing, if we weren’t so pressed for time, I’d love to hear what your thing actually is.” He grabbed your arm and pulled you around to his other side.

You peered over to Bulma who looked absolutely flawless in a long, strapless, red dress that hugged her curves almost as if it was her own skin. Vegeta was also apparently wearing his best, his armor was adorned with gold around the seams, a cape flowed behind him, and his emblem was embossed on his breastplate. They really did look like a royal couple and then there was you, looking like you’d rolled out of bed just moments before.

“I’d rather not go on the assumption that she told you this already, but you will not speak, no utterance of even a syllable If you’re spoken to, you’ll answer with a nod of your head. Understood?” He seemed even more tense than literally any other time you’d seen him.

“Got it. No words.” You wondered if Gine was going to make an appearance. She probably didn’t even show for training that morning, especially if she knew about the trial being that day.

“When this is over, there is still the matter of your use to be discussed. Don’t think I’ve forgotten.”

Before you could respond with some half thought out comeback, the large doors opened, and you immediately felt a tenseness building in your stomach.

The second you laid your eyes on the King, you knew what all of the hype was about. His demeanor alone was demanding of respect as he carried himself without an ounce of carelessness or patience. The scowl he held on his face seemed like a permanent fixture, at least you’d seen Vegeta with a little more range.

“Father.” Vegeta nodded with a slight bow of his head.

“Don’t be so familiar in front of others. Have you already forgotten all of your etiquette?”

“I apologize, King Vegeta.”

You held back any facial expression you wanted to give in the moment about his name being the same as Vegeta’s and their entire planet. Vegeta didn’t seem like the ‘junior’ type.

“Allow me to introduce my humans, this is Bulm-“

The King waved his hand dismissively, “I have no interest in knowing either of their names. My concern only goes as far as the abomination of their blood mixing with a saiyan’s.”

“Our race has bred outside of our line in previous years, they’re the most compatible to-“

“You’re doing nothing but chasing a myth with this hybrid idea of yours. I’m only allowing this rouse to continue because this planet has resources we can exploit and the humans seem to keep the morale up for the lower class saiyans.” The King seemed to sneer at the two of you with a glance that barely lasted one second.

“Of course, sir. I apologize for suggesting their usefulness expands beyond that.” Vegeta cowering was an odd sight to see.

“We need to discuss the sentencing before the trial begins. Where can we speak privately?” He made no move to look at the either of you.

Vegeta snapped his fingers at one of the saiyans standing to the side, “show the King to the study, I’ll be along shortly.”

“Do not keep me waiting, Prince Vegeta.” He shot him a warning glance before following the saiyan.

You waited a moment before relaxing a little. Your entire body had been tense that whole time and it was exhausting.

“Go to the throne room and wait for the trial to begin.”

“Do I have to be there?” You asked.

A thick silence lingered for a split second and you noticed the Prince’s jaw tense before he turned to you and clamped his hand over your throat.

“I’ve suffered your insolence for long enough, if you truly wish to be excused from this then I’ll be more than happy to end your involvement now.” He tightened his grip, his fingers digging into your skin and cutting off any air supply you had.

You grabbed at his forearm, struggling to breathe as your vision blurred, “p-please-“

“I’m not in the habit of repeating myself.” He released your throat and left you gasping and choking for air as he headed in the same direction the King had gone.

You held your throat as you inhaled sharply and filled your lungs with air once more, your eyes watering.

“Let’s go.” Bulma placed her hand on your back and guided you with her, offering nothing else for comfort.

After a moment of walking with her, you were finally able to breathe normally and felt like the color had returned to your cheeks.

“He won’t hesitate to kill you, especially not with the King around.” Bulma finally spoke as you walked.

“Maybe that would be better than this?” You rubbed your neck, knowing bruises were already forming.

Bulma stopped suddenly and turned to you, “if you want to keep toying with your life, then do it when I’m not around. This isn’t a perfect life and it’s by no means the life I wanted for myself, but it’s what I have and I enjoy waking up everyday knowing I’m still alive because I’ve seen what happens to the others who weren’t as lucky, who didn’t get the same opportunity as me.” The tears in her eyes remained there, never falling and staining her cheeks.

“Bulma, I-“

“Just stay on his good side when I’m around, please?” She didn’t wait for you to respond before she returned to her path and walked ahead of you.

You felt bad for putting her in any kind of harm’s way. You could tell she was just as frightened as you, but there was something more to it than that. There was still a lot of unknown bits to how Bulma ended up where she was. You never really asked and she never really offered the information freely. Of course there was the curiosity, but you assumed it wasn’t the same as yours. She always seemed so much more capable and put together, and less likely to end up in an auction. She had a genuine fear that doesn’t come from just hearing about something bad, it comes from experience.

You followed her in silence, wanting to reach out and apologize for being selfish, but you couldn’t find the right words that didn’t make you sound like a complete jackass. You entered the throne room, which had been altered a bit for the trial. Two thrones sat at the far end and a cement post had been placed in the center with what looked like an iron fixture on it.

Bulma took her place next to one of the thrones, obviously knowing which one was for the Prince and which was for the King. You stood next to her and fought with yourself on an apology before deciding on how to say what you needed to say. You grabbed her hand suddenly and squeezed it slightly, pulling her gaze directly to you. She offered a small, fleeting smile before turning away again, but she made no move to take her hand from yours.

You stood there together for what seemed like hours. Either time had stopped or it was just going by so slowly due to the anticipation. You felt anxiety sitting like a rock in the pit of your stomach, not just about the trial, but seeing Kakarot again. You hadn’t seen him in what felt like months but had only actually been a few days. You flexed your freehand, feeling the ache still settling in your fingers from the last session with Gine. You didn’t have the full time in one of the healing pods so there were still bruises and aches that remained. As a few other saiyans entered the room to stand in witness of the spectacle, you thought about how far you’d come since your first time take a step into the palace. You were overshadowed by Kakarot, all of it seeming so daunting in the moment.

The second Vegeta and the King entered the room, Bulma released your hand and seemed to stiffen. Her demeanor changed completely, but you assumed she was more accustomed to this sort of thing than you were. You silently chastised yourself for not asking her what to expect at the trial, how it would go down and what would happen afterward. A few moments passed after they took their positions in the thrones, then the large double doors at the end of the room opened, several saiyans entered, surrounding Kakarot. He was restrained almost in overkill. He was adorned with a collar similar to the one you had, only this one was thicker and probably had a lot more stopping power in it. They even had his tail restrained and pinned down around his waist. You couldn’t help but smirk at the black eye Turles was wearing, it made you feel a little better knowing Kakarot was most likely the one who gave it to him.

“Kakarot.” Prince Vegeta spoke first, drawing attention from everyone in the room.

“Prince Vegeta. King Vegeta.” He offered barely a nod at them while he glanced at you.

Just his gaze alone sent a shiver through you. You still felt that pull to him, regardless of what he’d said before. The pain and hurt was still there, but seeing him again made your feelings grow complicated. Your eyes met his in a split second and you wanted two things, to hit him and make him hurt the way he’d done to you, and then kiss him.

“Let’s begin. You’re being tried for murdering seven elite warriors and conspiring to overthrow myself and the Prince. These are treasonous charges, how do you plead?” King Vegeta said with as much disinterest as he could.

“Not entirely guilty.” Kakarot said.

“Explain.” The King urged.

“I’m only guilty of some of it. I did kill the elite warriors, I take the full sentencing for that, but my motives were my own. I had no plans to unseat you or the Prince.”

A lull of gasps and muttering spread throughout the room from the other saiyans. You noticed Gine and Bardock standing towards the front of the crowd with Raditz near. You wondered if they would stay after the trial, mainly Gine.

“You admit to slaughtering seven saiyans without provocation?” The King questioned.

“I admit to killing them, but it wasn’t without reason.” Kakarot continued to steal glances at you.

“Out of my own curiosity, I will grant a less severe sentencing if you share your reasoning behind murdering your fellow elite warriors.”

There was a silence that fell over the room as everyone froze with intrigue, wanting to hear his explanation. You were also extremely interested in why he would do such a thing, especially when he made such a point to be in defense of his brother and the other saiyans. Kakarot looked back at his family, his gaze meeting Gine’s in that moment before he turned back around.

“I can’t do that.”

“Can’t do what exactly?” The King pressed.

“I can’t share my reasoning.”

“Kakarot, please!” Gine called out, but was quickly silenced by Bardock pulling her back and placing his arm around her.

The King seemed to grow annoyed as he sat forward, “and why not? Are you protecting someone? An accomplice?”

“I acted alone. I’d like to request my sentencing now.” He seemed to be in a hurry to get it over with.

You looked over to Vegeta who had remained quiet. His hand gripped the arm of his chair to the point where his fingers were digging into the wood itself. There was more to this than Kakarot was letting on and Vegeta seemed to have answers.

“You’re forfeiting a right to a fair trial? Without sufficient evidence to discount the charge of treason you will be taking on all charges, regardless of your plea.” The King explained.

Kakarot gave you one last glance, “I plea guilty to all charges then.”

Your heart sank as more muttering erupting throughout the room. Gine turned towards Bardock and buried her face in his chest. Kakarot remained calm and stoic, giving no emotion away as he awaited his sentencing.

“Why is he doing this?” You whispered to Bulma.

She turned her head towards you, “I-I don’t know. I’ve never seen a trial like this before. Normally they have witnesses to their character, their actions, someone to defend them, but he’s giving up all of that.”

“You leave me no choice but to continue with your sentence. Since you are under the Prince’s orders, I’ll allow him to deliver the ruling.” The King sat back in his throne.

“As an elite warrior you pledged your allegiance to protecting all saiyans under the rule of myself and the King. You broke that allegiance when you took the lives of those you swore to protect. We find you guilty of all charges of murder and treason, for which the sentencing is death.” Vegeta spoke with little emotion, his hand still holding a death grip on the arm of the throne.

#lynn #invasion fic #kakarot #kakarot x reader #Gine #bardock #raditz #bulma #vegeta #king vegeta

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profoundtyrantharmony · 3 years

Text

Title : That's How I Feel

Warning : None. Italics means flashback. Y/f/c => your favorite color. Y/f/sc => your favorite summer clothe.

Words : around 2260

Pairing : Loki x Black!Chubby!Female!Reader

Requested by @rootbeergoddess "Can you write a story where a chubby, brown skinned reader is dating Loki and Loki decides to spoil her one day by taking her to the mall and buying her everything she wants?"

Masterlist // Request

My name is y/f/n y/l/n, I'm a young adult living in 21th century. You wonder why I would say that ? Simple. I'm a woman, black and chubby, and apparently in this era this is a huge problem. I didn't do anything wrong, I mean yeah I love good food and I'm not overly fond of any kind of sport but is this really enough of a reason to basically bully me everyday. Let me answer this basic question : HELL NO !!! I'm pissed of all this bad comments about my appearance, what I should do to lose weight, to eat healthier... I can't stand the fact that we are being judge (yes because of course I'm far from being the only one) based on our looks rather than our sharpe mind. I know my worth, and I am far more worthy than all of these piece of...garbage...those wanabe decent human. Right now I seem like I am incredibly confident but I'm not. I'm alone in my room talking to myself in my head because I am not capable of doing it in front of my bullies !! You wanna know what happened for me to be alone instead of happilly working ? Let me tell you a story...

I live in a cute two bedrooms appartment not far from the Avengers quarter (I'd say 20 minutes on foot). It's a charming place, the neighbors are the nicest and most of all not judgmental. I live alone but sometimes my boyfriend come to spend the night at my house, those are the best night that could happen. But today I woke up alone in my king size bed, unfortunatelly for me he had an important meeting early this morning so he had to go early. His name is Loki of Asgard heir to the crown of Jotunheim, adoptive son of Odin, brother of Thor and most importantly the Holder of my heart. It's been 4-5 months that we are actually together but we've known each other for about one year. We met at the Avengers compound where I worked as an assistant for Pepper Potts before I became the analyst that I am today, but that's a story for another time. As I was saying I woke up alone this morning, it was 8:30 am. I'm not due to work until 10:00 am. I decided to take my breakfast while mentally visualise what I will do to work, whilst thinking about how to avoid my mescreants of co-workers (you read it right co-workers not collegues, I'm not appreciate enough to call them that, I only consider Bonnie a collegue, she's the closest thing I have to a friend at work. ). Once my coffe and my toasts spread with honey were eaten I went to to the bathroom to prepare myself. The most difficult part for me is to chose what I am going to wear if I don't want any comments. The purpose is to clearly become invisible, like a shadow lurking in the corner of the room. I don't want to wear a cute dress, a fluffy skirt or a top with some lacework on it cause i will 100% receive insults, mockery, and I just don't have the strengh anymore, it already happened before it will happened again I can't do anything to stop it. I already try when I was younger and guess what "it's just words don't listen to them", thanks a lot I feel better now ! I finally decided on a simple dark tight blue jeans and a white shirt with an afro motif on it (just like me). I put some liner and mascara and I was ready to face my personal hell. I went to work on foot, it was sunny with a bit of fresh wind, perfect for 20 minutes of walk. I arrived at exactly 9:50 am, and went to my desk to begin with my daily task. It took time and mental energy cause i'm a bit perfectionnist. My boss knows of that fact and are still satisfied with me because my work is ALWAYS perfect and NEVER need rework, the fact that I won the award of the best employee last year and this year too is something that didn't escape me. That's why I went to the communal area to get some tea and a chocolate and pistachio cookie, I really needed it. Just before I arrived I heard my name being said, and clearly not in a friendly way. I stayed hidden in the corridor to listen to what was being said. I recognised the voice of five persons (three men and two women, all agents of shield), they were talking about how fat I am, how ugly I am, how my clothes are too tight and not meant for me. But if it was only about my body it would be just like usual, nothing to worry about, but they were talking about my personnality (low confidence, shy, discret) and about Loki, and that, I couldn't stand it ! How dare they insult him after all he has done for humanity, for shield, for them, only to be treated as a lesser man, it's absolutelly despicable. Understanding that whatever I could do I will never be enough for them made me sad and angry at myself. I didn't wanna eat anymore and decided to quit work for the day (don't worry I informed Pepper) and get back home and stay alone in my bedroom, laying on my dark green new bedsheets.

I stay alone like this for quite some time until I hear the familiar voice of my tender one.

"I came as fast as I could, Pepper warned me you left work early what happened ?" He seems so worried, I don't want him to see me as a weak little human even if I know that he doesn't see me like that at all.

"Don't worry it's nothing. Lets talk about something else, how was the meeting ?" He was looking at me as if he could read me, maybe he can, he is too cute, look at his face, his eyes, his...sad smile ? What happen to him ? "Why the sad face Loki ?"

"I'm not sad, I know what you're going through on a personnal level trust me, plus there is no such thing as secrecy when you work with and for the Avengers and shield. I know what those pathetic little things called humans have said about you, your collegue Bonnie was close to the area when she heard them, she called them on their bullshit (has been insulted short after) and came to Pepper who then came to me right after." He come to sit beside me, his face coming closer to mine, his hands taking my face in his, our forehead touches, our eyes getting close, we breath each other's in, it was so calm and tender. "The things you make me feel princess, I don't think you understand the power you have over me that's insane !" His smile when he said this makes my tears almost came free. We kissed each other slowly with a lot of passion until we stop to breath.

"I just don't understand why they are so mean with me, yes I'm black but I can't change that, yes I'm chubby but i'm don't have cardiac problems, cholesterol issues or diabete, I walk everyday to go to work, I'm as healthy as I can be and those buffons can go to hell because I'm so freaking smart that they can't understand how wonderful I am !!"

"You have a lot of confidence in you princess so why don't you use it at work ?"

"You mean why I do not take the lead ? You mean taking the lead the same way I take it last time we were together in bed ?" I was trying so hard to change the topic of conversation but that was vain.

"Hmm you're being a naughty girl don't play this game right now I'm being serious."

"You're no fun !! Well, when I'm with you I feel respected, love. I trust you the way i never have thought I could. You never judge me and you make me feel whole, you're the first person I see myself with for the long term, you're the one for me and I hope you will love me for the rest of our time." Tears were flowing from his eyes, he takes me in his arms and kisses me for all his worth. The moans that come out of my mouth was like a fuel to him, he could never stop loving me. "Come with me princess, we're going shopping !"

"Why did we came here Loki ?" I asked him.

"I have some items to purchase Princess." He says with with a smile that could bright the entire universe.

"How many items do you have to purchase?" He smirked at me, and calmly told me :

"A healthy amount".

We entered the mall, I didn't know what to look for, it's been so many time i didn't come here, work kept me grounded in a way. I always asked one of my neighbors to do my shopping in exchange of some petsitting (when hollidays comes, familly week-end...it's better than abandonment if you ask me). There were so many things I'd like to buy but I didn't do it. Loki was leading to the litterature corner of the mall, I remembered that my favorite author just published a book days ago but didn't purchase it. Without a word, he took the book and paid for it, I know he loves reading maybe he is a y/f/a's fan. We looked at each other, smiling.

"Where do you want to go now ?

"I heard about the new summer collection, I'd like to go and check it out of that's okay with you princess." How could I ever refuse this face. He took my hand in his and lead me to the summer clothes sections. There were to many wonderful skirts, dresses I couldn'tstop looking at them...but would I ever be worthy of wearing them...

"Princess what do you think about this gorgeous y/f/c y/f/sc ? I think it will compliment your figure and make your pop more."

"Why would you wanna buy it ? That's not exactly what you would wear my sweet."

"It's not for me" he said laughing, "That's for you !"

"...But why ?" I was shocked.

"Why would I want to spoiled the best thing that ever happened to me you mean ? Because I can and most importantly I want to do it. I want you to see yourself as I see you. I want you to feel self confident enough to allowed yourself to wear whatever you want without feeling self concious. And above all I want to please you as the Princess tou deserve. So I'm asking you, will you let me buy you books, clothes, make up, knits..."

"How do you know about the knits ?" I asked interumpting him.

"It doesn't matter, I know that you knit some tiny socks and caps for orphans babies, that you don't tell to anyone cause you don't brag about the good thing you do because that's not who you are and I love you all the more for it. You take so much care about people you don't even know but never about you. I'm here to change it I'm here to take care of you the way you won't do."

"Loki...I..I..Thanks you". I was crying my soul out. It wasn't from sadness but from hapiness, i couldn't describe the amount of love I felt for him this right moment. We hugged each other, the time stopped around us and we were floating like two leaves dancing with the wind.

"Lets go eat something, I saw a french backery at the other end of the mall."

"Good idea, I didn't eat since breakfast so I'm a little bit starving." I happilly answered.

"There is a lot of choices princess, croissant, paint au chocolat, chicolate chips cookie...a millefeuille..." he was undecided.

"Why not take the four and split, this way de could taste and eat a bit of everything." I told him, secretly hopping he'd say yes, cause, lets be honnest here, french food was literally my péché mignon (*cute sin/guilty pleasure*). He was more than happy with this idea, and more than happy to share his food with me. We talked a lot, purchase many other items, especially a bouquet of several flowers ( bouton d'or for joy ; white camellias for the eternal love ; fuchsias for unbreakable love ; gardenias for honesty ; lavender for respect and tenderness, last flowers but not the least the white roses for pure love). I was so overwelmed with joy that I couldn't contain my tears.

"What did I do to deserve all this Loki ?" I asked crying.

"There is no reason really..." he looked me in the eyes and I saw all the love pouring into them as he continued "...that's how I feel."

*This is the end of my first fic, hope you liked it, remember, english is not my mother tongue so there might be some mistakes.*

*If you want to request check out here*

*Likes, Comments and Reblogs are also appreciated*

#loki x reader #black reader x loki #black reader #chubby reader #loki laufeyson #loki odinson #fluff #oc character #reader insert #loki x fem!reader

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spiffyspuffy · 4 years

Text

My Mystic Messenger Opinions

(That no one asked for)

Zen

Character: 8/10 I know a lot of people think Zens annoying but I find him endearing. One of the best things about this game is the complexity of the characters and I love that Zen’s cockiness is actually how he hides his insecurities. Even though he’s egotistical about himself, he’s never shallow with MC. He says multiple times that he doesn’t care about MC’s looks. He loves her for who she is and shows this in how he makes an effort to get to know her and be her cheerleader everyday. An underrated thing about Zen is how emotionally intelligent he is. He’s great at helping the RFA members when they need emotional support (Yoosung’s grief over loosing Rika, Jaehee crying from the stress of her job and MC’s shock at almost being kidnapped).

Route: 2/10 Zen is a great character and he deserves a better route. The false rape accusation plot is horrible and offensive. Also, his route functions as an introduction to the game’s plot, so it’s exposition heavy and lacks action. The creators said that the lesson of his route is that when our insecurities are handled in a healthy way, they can push us to be better people. I love this message and I wish it had been highlighted more in his route.

Romantic Potential: 9/10 Zen is arguably the most dateable of all the characters. He’s a bad boy without being sketchy. He’s protective without being possessive. He’s kind without being a pushover and he’s smart without being pretentious. His biggest drawbacks are his overconfidence and and how busy he is with working. There aren’t any glaring red flags.

~ More under the cut ~

Jeahee

Character: 7/10 I love this adorable theater nerd! She comes across as formal and stuffy at first, but reveals herself to be passionate and funny the more you get to know her. I gave her a lower score because she does have a strong personality that rubs me the wrong way sometimes (her jealousy of MC in Zen’s route, her lack of sympathy towards Jumin in her own route and her general rudeness towards Yoosung). She is the most mature of the RFA though, so her exasperation is warranted. Being mature and grounded also makes Jaehee the least complex Mysme character. I’ve got a lot of respect for her though!

Route: 5/10 Getting to engage in discourse about capitalism and the patriarchy? Amazing and hands down the best part of her route. It’s really inspiring to see Jaehee stand up for herself and choose to follow her dreams. I think it’s important for every young person to hear that they should have a positive work/life balance and demand that their employer supports that. Other highlights are Seven helping Jaehee by making the Power Point presentation for Jumin’s cat project, getting to fangirl with Jaehee over Zen and the creepy stalker plot. I thoroughly enjoy her route and the only reason the score is so low is because some of the other routes are seriously incredible.

Romantic Potential: 8/10 Jeahee doesn’t have any red flags either. I think she’s perfectly capable of having a healthy, romantic relationship with MC. The biggest issue standing in their way is Korea’s bias against lesbian relationships. As a fellow coffee lover and theater enthusiast though, I could definitely see myself or someone similar having a happy life with her, even if it might have to be in secret.

Yoosung

Character: 6/10 I can’t stand people who aren’t competent. Yoosung is a terrible cook, he barely cleans and he doesn’t pay attention to his studies. On top of that, 80% of his personality is that he’s a gamer AND he’s in love with his “dead” adopted cousin. Yuck. ~ But ~ I understand that he’s depressed and depression can seriously effect someone’s executive functioning. Taking all of those negatives away, we’re left with a young man who’s trying to his best to be taken seriously, which is something I can relate to. It’s nice to see imposter syndrome represented and I admire his loyalty to his friends.

Route: 8/10 This route is sooo good! Who can forget the night when the RFA starts being aggressively stalked by Minty Eye? And the pic Zen takes of a believer looking at him through his apartment window...chills. His route only gets better from there when he infiltrates Mint Eye with Seven. This is the first time we get to see the twins interact and damn, is it confusing. But in a good way!! The biggest drawback is that MC is stuck in Rika’s apartment and doesn’t play much of an active role in the story.

Romantic Potential: 7/10 Despite all the negatives I listed about Yoosung, I do think he’s capable of have a healthy, romantic relationship with MC. Yoosung is also the only true sub of the RFA men, which is a definite plus for some players. Yoosung’s yandere side is a huge red flag though. MC better watch out if she doesn’t dote on him as much as he wants. Once he falls for her, he’s all in.

Jumin

Character: 5/10 Unpopular opinion, but I hate Jumin. I understand that he’s some people’s guilty pleasure though. Jumin’s good aspects are that he’s intensely loyal, an animal lover and has a dry sense of humor. I appreciate how devoted he is to the RFA and it’s members. He offers to help Zen multiple times (albeit rejected), sends everyone body guards in his route and pays the hospital in the SE to keep Saeran’s identity top secret. What I’m not a fan of is the way he obsesses over MC and traps her in his house. This isn’t the first time he’s shown obsessive tendencies either. Seven explicitly states that Jumin acted this way with Rika in the past. Huuuge red flag.

Route: 3/10 His entire route is fraught with rich people problems. I’m supposed to sympathize with him for an arranged marriage? All he had to do was say no. His father couldn’t force him. He’s possessive of MC because women have only ever wanted to be with him for his money? Not an excuse. Elizabeth going missing was a vaguely interesting story line, but Jumin’s relationship with his cat was cringey enough to overshadow the drama of it for me.

Romantic Potential: 3/10 Jumin has some serious issues. He’s never had a good female role model which has given him a deep seeded hatred of women. Remember when he tells MC that respecting women goes against his core beliefs? Yikes. Then, after meeting a woman who respects him and he actually likes, he locks her up and tries to change everything about her (cutting her hair, buying her a new wardrobe, teaching her the ‘proper’ way to walk, etc). We’re supposed to believe Jumin learns to be better by the end of his route, but he still proposes to MC after only a week of knowing her! I’m having a hard time picturing Jumin in a healthy relationship.

Saeyoung

Character: 10/10 I’m not saying Saeyoung is a good person. Far from it actually. But he IS very well written and extremely interesting. In the other routes, Saeyoung is energetic and funny, bringing much needed humor to heavy moments. It’s always a joy being in a chatroom with him. Then you have the reveal that he actually hates his job and that he was faking his personality, all to a sad and slowed down version of his theme song. This plot twist shook me to my core. What makes him so well written is that the devs did a good job dropping hints to his real personality in the other routes that players might not notice during their first play through.

Route: 9/10 This route is a wild ride from start to finish. This is when the plot threads from the other routes come together and start make sense. This route has secret agents, assassins, a deadly bomb, kidnapping, an evil twin, a powerful cult... It’s action heavy while still carrying enough emotional weight to make me cry every time. Saeyoung’s route is heavy and emotional and sooo worth playing.

Romantic Potential: 6/10 Saeyoung has a shady job and a complicated past. Choosing to be with him means putting your life in danger every day. If you’re okay with that, he’d be a decent romantic partner. He’s a little rough around the edges, but I do think he has potential to become more like his ideal self (God Seven) after reading his AE. He’ll always have that mean and serious side to him, but I don’t think he’s hopeless.

Character: 4/10 He’s low-key the worst. I sympathize with his trauma from being abused by Rika, but I don’t understand why he feels the need to fix everything by himself. Rika might be the source of most problems in this game, but V is partially responsible for standing by and letting her get away with everything.

My first issue with him comes from encouraging Saeyoung to join the agency. I know Saeyoung didn’t have many options, but how was encouraging him to train to become a hacker and assassin the best option?! On top of that, he stalked Zen per Rika’s request and took creeper photos of him, failed miserably at protecting Saeran and don’t get me started on how he loves Rika unconditionally. V has some good characteristics but I really don’t care about those when he’s so terrible otherwise.

Route: 10/10 This route is *chef’s kiss* the BEST. I wouldn’t call it a romance since Vs barely in it but damn is it riveting. Saeran is the perfect amount of loving and unhinged, MC get’s to know Rika on a personal level and V finally gets to be active instead of just reactive like he is in all the other routes. It’s also satisfying to find out how much V has been keeping secret and to get a glimpse into Rika’s psyche. But what really makes V’s route stand out among the rest is that there are spy action scenes like in Saeyoung’s route, but the player also gets to spend time in Mint Eye.

Romantic Potential: 7/10 I’ll be honest. I don’t think V will ever be able to move on from Rika. He’ll always love her, as evidence in his AE. Besides that drawback, I do think he’d be a good romantic partner for MC. V was never the issue in his past relationship with Rika. She was the abusive one and he was 100% the victim. I think he would treat MC just as well in their relationship as he treated Rika.

Saeran

Character: 7/10 I know I’m not the only one who loved the suave and cunning Saeran of the main routes who, after getting the therapy he needed, became an adorably shy and awkward man. Sadly, that’s not the character we got in AS. Instead, we met Ray, the split personality of Saeran’s psyche. Ray is charming and sweet as well as possessive and manipulative...which is something I’m into. But it’s not for everyone. Saeran’s real personality in AS is revealed to be angry and abusive and not at all similar to who he was in the main routes. I’ll give Cheritz props for writing a fairly accurate portrayal of disassociative identity disorder, but I think Saeran’s characterization is inconsistent. I get the impression Ray was an afterthought when creating AS.

Route: 7/10 A mixed bag for me. I really enjoy any chatroom/scene with Ray. He’s undeniably creepy, but those scenes were entertaining in a dark romance kind of way. On the other hand, the Saeran scenes had a lot of unrealized potential. Abuse is never cool. All his route needed to fix this was a scene where Saeran explained to MC that he was pretending to hate her to appease Rika and the other believers. While this fake hatred is implied, I think it needed to be outright stated. It’s also hard to believe that Saeran overcame his DID in the course of one night. I know all routes are limited to 11 days, but this one needed more. Highlights of this route are Saeyoung being kidnapped by his father and of course, dark Yoosung with Elizabun.

Romantic Potential: 7/10 I truly do believe that Saeran could go on and live a happy life in any of the endings where he escapes Mint Eye and receives therapy. While we only get a glimpse of what an emotionally stable Searan looks like, we know that he was kind and attentive with MC. Saeran is a giver and would do anything to make MC happy. Red flags are that Searan is still clingy at the end of his route. Yoosung makes a comment that he’s always holding MC’s hand when he sees them together. Also, his DID is something that will occasionally return and that’s something MC has to go into their relationship knowing.

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dragonflymage · 3 years

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(This has taken me forever to write. Be prepared for a long answer! *kicks it out of the draft box*)

I don’t think I’ll choose a Type for this answer because I chose Types in similar questions. This time I’ll go with the word “ideal” and play with that for a while.

This answer will be about the steps to finding an ideal match. INFP style.

Everyone knows that INFPs are the dreamers. They dream their way through being a child, through the teen years, and yes right through adulthood. It’s unavoidable. If a potential situation creeps up on an INFP, it won’t be long before they have come up with all the imaginative ways to live it and make it their own. Within their minds.

I am going to reveal some things about myself as an INFP that aren’t easy to reveal. Tapping into this realm of idealism that INFPs seem to be known for.

What exactly does it mean when someone says that INFPs are idealistic? It’s more than just seeing the good in others and hoping for a bright future. There’s a side of darkness within it as well because this doesn’t always mean ‘realistic’. It can mean searching for qualities that only exist in our thoughts.

My topic within these imaginative daydreams will focus on “The Ideal Match”.

I have to say that the first sensation that comes to me while thinking of this topic is… wistfulness.

In my expansive INFP imagination, my ideal match is someone who wants to know me.

That’s it.

Okay, that’s not all, but that’s where it begins. With someone who has SEEN me. And not just seen me, but moved closer instead of shaking their head and walking away. Of course, that doesn’t make an automatic match, but it has to begin somewhere.

Can you imagine the elation of being truly seen? That tiny ray of INFP light shown outward has caught someone’s attention. What should be done now? It isn’t love yet. Right? This elation isn’t love. But what if it is? No, it’s much too soon. Maybe if the door is opened a little bit more. … What are they doing now? Running? Moving even closer? OMG. What should I do next?!

Breathe. This doesn’t mean they are devoting all of their eternity. It just means they are curious. Stay calm.

Does that sound like panic? It might be. There’s always the fear of doing too much too soon, yet wanting to reach out and touch. The unseen internal tug of war.

So, this is where the INFP stands now — Revealed some of their deep self and was noticed for it. Then the person stuck around wanting to know more.

This is a great beginning. But what’s next? It would probably be easier to know what to do if this took place in-person. Body language and tone of voice is clearer to decipher. Most likely this all happened online, where emotions and reactions can be filtered through the process I refer to as: “I’m doing my freakin’ best to explain myself with only text!” *flails*

I would say that being seen and someone wanting to get to know you are where new friendships and possible future-relationships reside.

Being seen is nice, but being understood is even better!

It looks like a connection is forming. This is where our INFP will decide what sort of sharing is appropriate.

There are all sorts of sharing:

💙 Surface sharing - which involves interests and everyday activities. Also known as “small talk”. Topics such as pets, job or school, hobbies, books, etc. This isn’t always an INFP favorite, but conversations have to begin somewhere. During the small-talk phase, an INFP will determine whether there is potential for a connection. And, yes, an INFP is more than capable of this discovery just from small talk. This could last for a brief time period or for many days, depending on the person’s comfort level. 💙 Test sharing - which involves emotions attached to topics. Such as the meanings behind this or that event in life. It could be another subtle test to see if the other person is still interested in talking. Or it could be a bit of desperation to have someone to finally discuss the deeper aspects of the world. Some of these emotion-laden topics might not be used by most people until later in a potential friendship-relationship, but INFPs may reach this level of conversation fairly quickly. This type of conversation could continue throughout the friendship-relationship, obviously while no longer in a ‘testing’ fashion. 💙 Personal sharing - which involves longer and more frequent conversations. It’s a bit like sharing your life in ‘real-time’. At this point, the INFP has decided this is someone who is interested because they haven’t run away, and maybe it’s okay to invest more of ourselves with them. These sorts of talks are like inviting them to our home and giving them a glimpse of what life is like for us. These discussions are saved for close friends and potential love interests. 💙 Deep sharing - which involves all those things an INFP shares with no one. And by ‘no one’ I mean ‘a rare and special someone’. I think many INFPs have an inner vault where they keep all the topics that have been too much for other people to handle - such as traumatic memories. Some INFPs, after being rejected in the past, may choose to never touch this level with anyone again. Other INFPs may decide that if this special person can understand what’s in the vault, then they are absolutely ‘the one’. Whether as a love interest or a very close friend.

🍵 There could also be a level 5 which may involve fantasies or the darkest of secrets they may never tell anyone, but some INFPs might lump those in with #4. It depends on the individual. 🍵

The difficulty with those Sharing Levels is finding an order that works and sticking to it. It wouldn’t work well to start with #1 Small Talk and then skip right to #4 Deep Sharing. (I mean, unless you’re talking with a therapist, then go ahead.)

Now that I got the informative portion out of the way, it’s time for some INFP idealism!!

INFPs are amazing humans. We care with our every breath and we want the best for those around us. We can also become stuck within our idealistic thoughts. No, that isn’t a secret.

We are called The Dreamers for a reason.

INFPs have a difficult time with this strange thing called Reality. We are flooded with violence from the media, and sometimes it exists in our personal lives. Reminding us of all the hurting souls we can’t help. We have potent plans of how we will change the world. Then Reality sneaks up from behind and whispers “you do realize no matter how hard you try, you can’t save them all…” Thanks, Reality.

It’s these realizations that can infiltrate all aspects of life - how we envision our future, how we envision our environment, and how we envision our Ideal Match or our Ideal Partner (in a potentially romantic sense).

I first started imagining a ‘love interest’ at around age 12. It wasn’t marriage or white gowns that I imagined. It was someone who cared by listening to me.

One of the first crushes in a love-interest way I had on a person (other than classmates I mentioned in a different answer) was Hawkeye from the MASH re-runs. ( I don’t know what it is about me and ENFPs, but anyway… I spent long hours daydreaming about somehow being illogically inserted into that environment just so I could sit and have long conversations with Hawkeye. 😅 I thought he was the perfect match for me. Of course, he had other issues going on, but I was willing to overlook them all! This daydream went on for a few years until I moved along to other potential unreachable love interests.

The important factor about the idealism and daydreaming is that I was internally forming a list of what I hoped to find in a future partner.

Attention and caring were important. Kindness to others. Devotion to helping people. Silly humor. Depth of character. Capable of understanding pain. Willing to imagine what could be.

Sadly, if an INFP isn’t paying attention, they can idealize themselves through life…even through the most painful events and can become addicted to this coping mechanism.

Like I did.

The downside was that since I never truly encountered a great deal of decent treatment personally, I didn’t know how to recognize it in others. It was unfamiliar territory (for many depressing reasons). So in my early 20s, what I did was latch onto a person who I thought had the potential and idealized everything else about him. He gave me attention, sure, but I think I consciously idealized everything else about him. Even when there were many clues that he wasn’t a good match for me.

I rejected every natural instinct I had and encompassed myself in flowery daydreams in order to survive the life I’d suddenly found myself in.

That is probably an extreme example of what idealism can do to a person. But I think that INFPs have the very real probability of slipping into this unhealthy internal mindset.

If we aren’t careful, idealism can turn into an INFP mind-trap.

I don’t want to turn this into a negative answer. Idealism has wonderful benefits if used in healthy creative ways. To imagine what could be. But there also needs to be a balance with Realistic thoughts.

Always stop and ask yourself “Is this truly a possibility? Is this actually what is taking place? Am I somehow coloring the truth from myself?”

Only then will an INFP truly find, not just an Ideal Match, but a True Match.

Without any of the rose-colored glasses interfering with what is Real.

#mbti #infp #infp thoughts #relationships #mbti thoughts #introvert #myers-briggs #hsp #emotions #emotional #sensitivity

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