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surveys-at-your-service · 3 years

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Survey #368

“whatever doesn’t kill you, is gonna leave a scar”

Have you ever bought a YouTuber’s merch? My favorite shirt is the Day of the Dead design by Cloak, which is Markiplier's and jacksepticeye's clothing brand. Mom's friend/former co-worker also got me a Ninja Sex Party shirt because she knew I liked them. There are SO MANY YouTubers I wanna support by buying shirts. Do you think oatmeal tastes better when made with water or milk? Milk, 110%. Have you ever left a note in a library book? No. What time of day do you prefer to wash your hair? Morning. Has anyone ever spread lies about you? Yes. Have you ever taken a photograph with a celebrity? If so, did it turn out the way you wanted, or do you wish you could retake it? No. If you could move out of your home country permanently, would you? If so, where would you go? If it didn't mean being so very far from my family, I would love to move to Canada. Is there a celebrity that everyone else seems to love, but you find totally overrated? Why is it that you don’t like them? I legit don't know who's considered currently popular, and I especially don't know who they are as people. If you could volunteer for any charity, which one would you choose? Do you think it’s more important to help humans, or are animal and environmental charities equally important? Something relating to animals, and I think they're both equally important. Do you prefer holidays where you relax, or actually do things? I like a mix. Something chill, but you still do some stuff as a family. Do you think that after we die our spirit is still alive? Yes. Has anybody ever told you that you could be a model? Someone has mistaken me for a model in a picture I once took. It was one of the most flattering things I've ever heard, haha. Do you use different kinds of moisturizer for different body parts? ie. hand lotion for your hands, face cream for your face. Or do you just use one moisturizer for all body parts? Yes. Have you ever felt like you were someone’s rebound? No. Has anybody ever broken up with you over something really pathetic? What was it? Have you ever been dumped in a disrespectful way? (eg. through text, through a friend..) I have 100% been dumped in a very cowardly and disrespectful way; after dating Jason for nearly four years and being very serious, he broke up with me very abruptly over Facebook Messenger. His reason was valid, but at the same time, he NEVER talked to me about it. Apparently my depression was dragging him down. If he'd fucking communicated it, I would have explored new treatment options so goddamn fast. But no, he decided to snap his fingers and disappear. That's exactly WHY it was so traumatic, I think: it was so unexpected and sudden. Did you have a lot of role models as a kid? Animal enthusiasts like Steve Irwin and Jeff Corwin for sure. Do you feel like anyone looks up to you? Why or why not? God no. I'm just... not someone to aspire to be like. What was the last thing you found offensive? I'm not sure. Who is the nicest person you know? My mom. Do you feel safe in your country? I feel safe in NC, rather. Like I don't expect an atom bomb or terrorist attack or something in this obscure area. In the U.S.A. itself, sometimes I do, sometimes I don't. America is definitely not loved by every other country. Do you feel safe where you live? Not in this city, no. Have you been falsely diagnosed with something by a bad doctor? Yup. Did y'all know I apparently have ADHD? I know, shocking. Have you ever had a doctor refuse to treat you? No. Name the strangest game you’ve ever played (video game or real game): The first Silent Hill, probably. It took a lot of reading to get it. Do you know anyone who has been struck by lightning before? No. Which cartoon character would you want to keep as a pet? Does Stitch count? Or a Pokemon. Do you like marshmallows? Yes. What is your favorite flavor of candy cane? I really like the Jolly Rancher candy canes, I think they are? Have you ever fostered an animal? No. Do you still take hot showers when it’s hot out? Not as hot, but not cold except on very extreme occasions. When writing $ sign, do you draw one line through the S or two? Two. What animal have you always wanted as a pet but couldn’t have? I'm thankful that my parents were pretty open-minded to what pets I really wanted, but one I was never allowed to have was a ferret because of how messy and smelly they are. List three people you’ve had crushes on: Jason, Sara, and Sebastian were probably my biggest crushes. Have you ever thrown up from cramps? No, but god have I felt close. List three people you had a hard time forgiving. Jason, Colleen, and my dad. Who is the most spiritual person you know? Probably my sister's mother-in-law. Would you ever start a vlog? God no, I'd bore people to tears. Are your dreams coming true yet? I mean, I guess in some ways with my mental health. In my deepest depression, what I have now was a dream, even though current me is very discontent with it. Most of my dreams, though? No. Do you struggle with depression? I've been diagnosed with severe depression since 7th grade. Are you haunted by your past? A few things won't leave me alone. What medical conditions do you have? Just a lot. There are even more that are up for debate. I've talked about my diagnosed conditions enough. Do you use a Magic Bullet? No. What does your apron look like? I don’t have one. What are your favorite spicy foods? Hot Cheetos, Takis, hot wings, jalapeno pizza... Man, I love spicy food. Which do you like better: being an adult or being a kid? Being a kid. Were you excited to be a teenager on your thirteenth birthday? I had very mixed feelings. Did you feel insecure in high school? Shit, I still do. Would you ever be friends with someone who was suicidal? What the FUCK is this question? No fucking shit I would be. Someone being suicidal in no way affects who they are as a person. Who was the biggest bully in high school? I don't think there really was one. What was your favorite class in high school? Art. Would you rather have a daughter or a son? If I wanted kids, a daughter. Have you ever written to an advice columnist? No. Have you ever had a doctor not believe what you told him? Maybe? I did however have an employee at the ER the first time I went try to pry out of me that my self-mutilation was for attention, and it wasn't until I insisted about a dozen times that it wasn't that he believed me. It's odd looking back that I got REALLY attached to him during that stay, knowing now that it was absolutely horrible and extremely unhelpful for him to do that. If you’re female, would you feel uncomfortable having a male gynecologist? I would absolutely refuse to have a male one. Do you like Lisa Frank? Yeah, like can you talk about aesthetic. What gives you nightmares? Boy, I wish I could tell you, given how much I have them. Were you ever hospitalized as a child? No. Did you get senior pictures taken? No. What color is your bicycle? I don’t have one. Did you ever have to take home a fake baby in health class? No, thank fuck. Would you rather wear ivory or white on your wedding day? What color will your bridesmaids wear? I'd rather wear black. I think red will be the bridesmaids' color. Would you rather have a swimming pool or trampoline? I want a swimming pool so damn badly so I could exercise my legs without worrying about sweating, and I can stop and rest whenever I want, unlike going walking or something. I don't think my knees could handle a trampoline. Do you think babies are cute? Some, sure. But a lot, not really. Do you dream about the future a lot? Yeah. Do you think about your past a lot? Way too frequently. How good are you at living in the moment? I'm trying to get better at it. Have you ever questioned God’s existence? Yeah. Vanilla frosting or chocolate? Chocolate. What’s your favorite foreign cuisine? I've actually been exploring Italian pasta lately. I'm not a big fan of foreign food that I've tried, though. Have you ever moved to another state? No. Did you do anything productive today? No. .-. Can you say the alphabet backwards? No, actually. Do you like flowers? Of course; does anyone not? Have you ever thought you were gonna die? I didn't care if I did or didn't. What kind of mood are you in today? I was honestly really depressed through most of it. Just health stuff was really getting to me. I just woke up from what was honestly like a four-hour nap and I feel all right, I guess. What are you craving right now? I REALLY want Domino's jalapeno pizza. Is there anyone you would seriously punch right now if you had the chance? No. What is worse, physical or emotional pain? Definitely emotional. Have you ever walked in on somebody doing something… questionable? When Dad still lived with us, I think he might have been watching... you know... on TV when I came into my parents' room for something. Idk for sure though. I didn't ask, and I don't want to know. If you were to make videos on YouTube, what would they be of? Oh god, idk. I don't want to make any. What I'd have most fun with would be reptile education, but I 1.) have literally one snake, 2.) am not extremely educated on a good number of them and don't want to be misleading, and 3.) I would run outta content fast. So, leave it to Snake Discovery, haha. Posting pictures of yourself in a bathing suit on the internet - ok or not? Yes, it's okay????? If you're talking about me personally though, you won't see me dead in a bathing suit picture. Do you typically laugh when somebody falls down? No, I gasp and see if they're okay. What is the most disturbing movie you’ve ever watched? Paranormal Entity. The ending is... a lot. Your opinion of Katy Perry, please? I like a couple of her songs. If you could say anything to your Mom right now… what would it be? "Thank you for absolutely everything."

#survey #surveys #questions #lyrics: ''leave a scar'' by marilyn manson

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nubianamy · 3 years

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35k, PG, Finn/Sam, pre-slash, pre-canon, camp, series, drama

from chapter 3

Every time Finn and Sam were around the campfire after that, Finn encouraged him to sing. Sometimes it was with Aggie’s borrowed guitar, and sometimes it was just him, without any accompaniment. Sam had a strong, melodic voice, and it didn’t really need the guitar, but Finn noticed he was louder and more confident when he was strumming along, and that was great to witness.

One evening, after most of the guys had gone back to their cabins and Finn and Sam were there tending the dying fire, Sam turned to him curiously. “How come you never sing by yourself? I mean, I would play anything you wanted to sing.”

“I don’t sing,” Finn shook his head perhaps a little too quickly, “that’s kind of the rule me and Puck have. Like, he’s the front man for the band, and I get to do the harmonies and stuff when we mess around.”

Sam seemed to accept that at face value, which suited Finn just fine, even if it involved throwing Puck under the bus with the implication that Puck had decided on the rule. When really, it was because whenever Finn had taken lead vocals, he’d managed to almost put the beater through the kick drum, he got so tense.

“The thing is, I can barely hear you when I’m singing,” Sam said, poking the fire with a long stick. “I’m kind of loud in my own ears, if you know what I mean. But what I can hear sounds really good.”

He smiled over his shoulder at Finn, not teasing, not waiting for Finn to say something, just because that was how Sam was. Being next to him, watching him smile like that, gave Finn courage. He took a deep breath. “I, uh… I used to sing all the time, when I was a kid. My mom had all these cassette tapes, and we’d play and sing in the kitchen and in the car. And she dated this guy, Darren. He always said I should be a singer when I grew up.”

“Sounds like he was really supportive.” Sam turned so he was facing Finn, digging the stick into the ground so he could lean against it, “What about your mom? Did she... not like it?” He quickly added, “I just... you don’t sing anymore, so I assume someone convinced you not to, or something.”

“Nobody,” Finn said, shrugging. “I mean, nobody in particular. You know how guys are. It just stopped being cool to do stuff like that. Like playing video games or reading comics. Me and Puck, we still do those things together, but… we don’t tell anybody? That would kind of be the death of our popularity, and Quinn, she thinks that’s really important.”

Sam nodded slowly, and in the darkness and the firelight it was hard to read much of his expression, “I guess people don’t do a lot of things they want to do. But, everyone here likes the singing. And I definitely do, and I like comic books and video games, so you already know I’m super lame.” He reached forward to nudge Finn’s knee with his fingers as Finn chuckled. “If you ever wanted to try with me, that’d be cool.”

“Try singing? I mean, we’ve done that lots.” Finn gave him a nervous smile. “Maybe if nobody else was around, I would. If it was just us.”

Sam looked down at the log they were sitting on for a long moment before he looked back and smiled, “I mean, Sean’s always sneaking over to the cheerleading camp, right? You come and get me when you’re ready, and I’m happy to listen.”

It didn’t happen that night, or the night after that, but Finn thought about Sam’s suggestion a lot, maybe more than he should have. It was running through his mind pretty much all the time when he wasn’t focusing on something else. Which, unfortunately, seemed to be during a lot of the practices.

“Hudson! Are you planning on running at any point this morning!” Coach Tyler yelled, and Finn picked up the pace as he quickly as he could until he was next to Sean again.

“Look, dude,” Sean looked around and gave Finn a pointed look, “You need to focus.”

“I’m trying—”

“No, your mind’s somewhere else,” Sean reached over and tapped the side of his head with the back of his hand. “Listen, I get it. You’re not finding this challenging. But the QB boat has sailed, and you need to be giving this your all, okay? Now... What can I do to get your mind off whatever it’s on, and back on these plays? Because we’ve got our second game coming up, and if Lucas loses to Sam’s team? He’s gonna be fucking insufferable.”

“Seriously, it’s nothing. It’s just something between me and Sam.” Finn shook his head, “We haven’t had time to really work it out—”

“Great. Me and Aggie are gonna go smoke weed in another cabin tonight. So, you and Sam can pick a room and hash this all out, before I lose my patience with you, dweeb.”

Finn watched as Sean moved away and was about to move himself when there was a hand on his shoulder, stopping him dead. He winced, expecting to see Coach Tyler, but instead Lucas was looking at him with a very neutral expression. “You’re interested in being QB?”

“Kind of?” Finn tried to settle under Lucas’s gaze. He’d been friendly enough to him, but then he’d turn around and be terrible to Aggie. Finn didn’t trust him. “I mean, yeah, I’m interested, but… that’s your position, right? Yours and Sam’s?”

“It’s like saying the circus belongs to the ringmaster and the accordion-playing monkey,” Lucas rolled his eyes, and looked Finn up and down, “I’m not going to be playing next year, and I kind of like the idea of passing this on to someone. I mean, you’ve got shitty taste in friends, but...” He shrugged. “I’ll find you when I’m ready, Hudson.”

Finn watched him walk away, feeling much the same as he had when Darren told him he should be a singer. Seriously, if I had your voice, my group would still exist. Keep it up. He felt a shiver. It didn’t matter in that moment if Sam wanted to be QB or not. He pictured himself on the field, in the center of the team, calling the plays, catching the hike, passing the ball for the touchdown. It actually felt possible.

Maybe that was why, when Sam asked him at dinner, “So are we singing tonight by the fire?” Finn shook his head.

“Aggie and Sean are busy,” he said. “We can be alone in the cabin.”

“Oh.” Sam seemed to hesitate, causing the line of people waiting for food behind him to stop for a moment, before he quickly took a step forward again. “Yeah. Okay. Uh, your room or mine?”

“Whatever. Except our room has that chair with no arms. It might be easier for you to play guitar sitting there, instead of on the bed?”

“Isn’t that chair really uncomfortable?” Sam said, walking straight past the salad bar without stopping. “I mean, I’m fine with either. The chair sounds great. Just, if you want the bed instead, I can make that work.”

It turned out the evening was drizzly, anyway, so Finn didn’t feel so bad keeping Sam all to himself. Back in their cabin, however, Sam seemed restless, moving from one thing to another. Finn tried to give him space.

“You know, I think I’m going to go for a run,” Sam told him finally.

Finn raised an eyebrow as Sam stripped off his t-shirt. “In the rain?”

“Just a short one. It’ll make it easier for me to focus.” He backed toward the door in his undershirt. “I won’t be long.”

“You’re gonna get wet.” Finn said, but before he could try his argument for why Sam should sit down before he lost his nerve, Sam had vanished out of the door, his glasses abandoned on the side table. Finn stood by the door, watching Sam’s legs carry him around the lake trail until he was out of sight. Then he went through the bathroom into his and Sean’s room, dug his phone out of his jacket pocket, and dialed Puck’s number.

It went to voicemail once, but the second time Finn called, it clicked to life. “You have the worst timing, Hudson. I’m in the middle of something.” Puck sounded annoyed, but there was the sound of music playing softly in the background so he couldn’t be too busy, “Or, I mean, I’m about to be getting into something.”

“Dude, you could have let it go to—uh.” He laughed sheepishly. “Sorry. I’ll be quick. What’s a song you and I sing together that’s really good? I mean, really, really good. One that shows off a little.”

“How about...” Puck trailed off, and there was a noise in the background that sounded almost like a groan.

Let's talk about sex, baby Let's talk about you and me Let's talk about all the good things And the bad things that may be

“Not that,” Finn protested. “Dude, I’m not trying to get in anybody’s pants. What the hell. I’m talking good singing.”

“Why’re you singing to someone if you don’t want to get in their pants?” Puck scoffed. “Can I offer...”

Come out Virginia, don't let 'em wait You Catholic girls start much too late Aw but sooner or later it comes down to faith Oh I might as well be the one

Finn flung himself onto his bed, staring up at the ceiling. “No, no, Billy Joel is your range, not mine. Something higher.”

“So much for being quick about it. Sounds like the rumors about you aren’t exactly accurate.” He could hear a scuffling noise, and shushing and snorts of muffled laughter.

“Dude, who’s there with you?” Finn said suspiciously.

“Oh, this big, handsome, burly right guard. Yeah, we’re going at it pretty hot and heavy right now.” Puck sounded almost bored. “And, oh, yeah, there’s Mr. Ryerson coming through the door.”

“You really know how to make everything gross,” Finn said, grinning. “Okay, well, if you can’t think of anything, I’m going to have to default to Journey.”

“Do that Steve Perry single, the one from Straight Talk.” Puck hummed the chorus, and Finn sat up. “Can I hang up on you now, or do you have more stupid questions?”

“No, I think I’m good. Have fun… whatever you’re doing.”

“Looks like I might be doing some singing, actually.” Puck sounded amused. He added, to whoever was there, “You’re serious? Right now?”

Finn laughed. “I’m out of here. Whoever she is, good luck.”

He had to look up the lyrics to the song on his phone, not because he hadn’t sung it eight thousand times, but because he was sure he had been singing some of them wrong for years. Somehow it seemed important to get the lyrics right when he was singing for somebody else. Not that he was singing to Sam, or anything like that.

Actually, now that he was reading the lyrics, Finn decided he might want to have second thoughts about singing this particular song. It wasn’t because it was a love song, but it was kind of sad, and not exactly upbeat. But it was too late to call Puck back, and he wasn’t going to pick something else now.

There was the sound of footsteps on the stairs outside, and Finn sat up on the bed quickly, his phone almost bouncing on the mattress as it slipped from his hand. He had begun to swing his legs off, but the door opened with a very loud noise, and Sam stepped in, shaking out his hair.

“Paul wanted us to know that the hose for the sprinkler system is working again,” he said dryly, barely looking as he pulled at his undershirt that was soaked to his skin. “It came off and sprayed me, but he, very heroically...” he trailed off, his eyes finally falling on Finn who was resting back on his hands, his legs splayed wide. “Uh... are you... waiting for someone?”

“Me? No.” Finn straightened up, trying to figure out what to do with his hands. He rose to his feet, tripping over his shoes a little. “Who would I be… um. Can I get you, like, a towel or something?”

“I should get to the bathroom,” Sam gestured but his shoes squelched as he took a step, and Finn quickly shook his head.

“No way, you need to lose the shirt at least, man, before you get sick. You can borrow one of mine until you go next door.” He grabbed one of his big, comfy McKinley High athletics shirts from his drawer and held it out. “Just—sit there and take off your shoes. I’ll get you that towel.”

He ducked into the bathroom. The towels on the rack both smelled like feet, so he rummaged in the shelf above the sink until he found a clean one. It was a worn towel from Six Flags, the one with the picture of the roller coaster on it.

Finn brought it back into his room where Sam was sitting on the floor in a puddle, his soaking-wet undershirt in a pile next to one of his shoes. He was struggling to get the other one off. When Finn snickered, he shot him an exasperated look.

“It’s really hard to untie wet shoelaces,” he protested.

“Hey, I’m not saying anything,” Finn held up his hands with a grin.

He exchanged Sam’s wet undershirt for the dry towel, then took the shirt into the bathroom to drip dry. He couldn’t help but pause in the doorway, though, and glance back at Sam, who was contorting himself trying to get a better angle on the lace, until his foot was nearly over his head, as he got more and more frustrated.

“Here.” Finn knelt on the floor next to him, gesturing for Sam to put his foot back on the floor. “You’re just making it hard for yourself. Let me.”

Sam looked very unsure about this, but he let Finn tug at the heel of his shoe until it finally slid off his foot with a sloppy sound. It made them both snicker. When Finn presented him with the shoe, like it was a priceless gift, Sam laughed harder.

“Thanks.” Sam rolled his eyes. “For the towel, too. It’s been a pretty crappy evening so far. Maybe... I should just turn in.”

“You think it’s going to get any better if Aggie gets home and sees you’re asleep?” Finn joked lightly, “I bet he’d put your hand in warm water just on principle. Come on, why don’t we just... hang out. I’ve got this dumb book I’m supposed to read for my classes next year, I’m sure you could do some sketching or something, right?”

That made Sam brighten a little. “Yeah, that sounds pretty good.”

It didn’t take long for the two of them to get comfortable, but the separate beds felt like way too far away to Finn’s mind. He pulled the blanket off the bed, and made himself a little half-nest on the ground, his back to the drawers. Sam spread out on the mattress, not physically, but between the sketchpad, a small pile of comic books, and the guitar resting against the headboard, there wasn’t a lot of space there.

The book was very boring, but listening to the sound of Sam’s pencil skritching away on the paper was strangely relaxing.

It wasn’t until the third time that he lifted his hand to his nose, and Sam hummed in a mildly negative way, that he turned to look. Sam finished with a line, and then looked back towards Finn and froze. Finn offered a small smile, “You doing all right?”

“Yeah, I was just...” Sam glanced at the sketchbook on his lap and then back to Finn. “Art, you know?”

“Are you drawing me?” Finn couldn’t help but ask, his chest feeling strangely warm. Sam looked mildly horrified, but after a beat he slowly nodded. “Can I see?” Finn continued, and that got a sharp negative. Finn tilted his head. “Why not?”

“Because... it’s embarrassing.” Sam shrugged, “And private. And you were supposed to sing, and you didn’t, so I’m holding my art ransom.”

“Oh, yeah?” Finn felt his smile broaden. “Does that mean you would show me if I sang something?”

Sam glanced back at the sketchbook and then back to him, “It’s honestly not that good. I mean, I really want to hear you sing, but I don’t want you to be disappointed if you’re expecting the Mona Lisa or something.”

“Dude,” Finn said softly. “There is literally no way I would be disappointed by you, Sam. Ever.”

Read the rest of chapter 3 | Read the whole story on AO3

#@karofsky #finn/sam #sinn #@beshrew-my-very-heart #glee fanfiction

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itsanerdlife · 4 years

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Cruel Boy 4/33

Pairing: Howie Stark x Reader

Warning: Lies. Betrayal. Just a lot of violence. Mentions of Domestic abuse. Parental abuse. Murder Suicide. Death. Guilt. Hate. Deception. Lots and lots of anger.

A/N: This is a bit darker theme, but Howie isn’t dark. Anger problems and bad choices but he’s not a bad person.

Playlist!!

First love. First heart break. Life time of hate. When the silver spoon feeding you love is taken away, you learn to lick it off the knives. Howie Stark broke you. Him and his brother ruined your life. Destroyed your dreams and crushed your soul. Your best friend is dead and your life is a mess. When you take a bartending job, it just happens to be owned by the Bastard Son’s MC. Just your fucking luck. Jokes, you haven’t had luck since Gwen died and Howie ripped out your barely beating heart. There is no way in hell you’re giving him a second chance. Hell will freeze over before you let him touch you again. Not a chance are you ever letting the Stark’s near you again. Hell might have just frozen over.

Tag List Open

His jaw works, his beer tastes bad, throbbing jealousy fills his chest. He’s not paying attention to the conversation at the table he sits at with his brother and Luke. His eyes locked on her and Steve. They’re having a bantering conversation as she moves around the bar, always coming back to Steve.

“Don’t do it.” Peter warns him.

“Huh?” He looks over at his brother. Luke laughs, picking up his beer.

“Don’t do it. Steve’s a good guy, I don’t want to get into a fist fight with him.” Peter shakes his head.

“Pete.” Howie huffs.

“Dude, we royally fucked that girl up. You take whatever she dishes out. You think stumbling upon her five years later, and saying you miss her is going to fix that extremely fucked up shit she went through?” His brother calls him out. “I know we’re stupid, but damn.” Peter scraps a hand down his face.

“I didn’t say it was going to fix it. But why is she so pissed off?” Howie scoffs.

“Maybe because you literally ripped her barely beating heart out of her chest and left on the side walk in the rain?” Peter shrugs.

“I know what I did.” Howie grumbles, glaring at his brother.

“Look, maybe try to talk to her. Talk, not smart ass comments. Maybe it’s time she gets some of the truth.” Peter sighs.

“Cause telling her the fucking truth is going to make her hate me less?” He scoffs.

“Maybe you hate yourself.” Luke spoke suddenly. Howie’s mouth closes, he doesn’t say anything. Instead he picks up his beer bottle and downs it.

“You didn’t see her. You didn’t hold her in the hospital. You didn’t watch her fall apart. You weren’t there on her porch that night.” Howie bites out at his brother. “Hate myself?” His eyes cut to his friend. “You have no fucking clue.” He shakes his head, getting up. Stalking towards the bar, her eyes cut to him. She picks up two bottles from under the bar, moving towards him.

“Tequila or whiskey?” She asks, head tipping to the side. Fucking gorgeous, sassy, smart mouthed, everything pulled right from his god damn dreams.

“How did you know?” He smirks.

“I’m sure your jaw is aching.” She quarks a brow at him. He drops his head, a smirk on his lips. Looking up again he nods.

“Your pick.” He looks at the bottles in her hands.

“You’ll need the tequila.” She nods, pouring into a glass.

“Why’s that?” He takes the glass.

“Cause you’re already fucking salty.” She snorts, walking away. Son of a bitch. He watches her, filling shot glasses a smug smirk on her fucking mouth. He leans in on the bar, her eyes cut to him.

“That make you bitter?” He asks, smirking. He pushes off the bar, walking back to the table.

“I said talk, not smart ass comments.” Peter scraps his hand down his face.

“She started it.” Howie bites back.

“Why do you like pissing her off?” Luke asks.

“Never seen her jealous before.” Howie shrugs.

“Hell is about to break loose around here.” Peter sighs, downing the rest of his beer.

“Shits going to be fucking interesting.” Luke chuckles.

“Fuck off.” Howie bites out. He downs his glass, wincing. She laughs, behind the bar. Eyes locked on to him.

“I swear to God, I heard her call you a pussy with that laugh.” Peter grins.

“I’m going to tell MJ to stop letting you into her pants.” Howie shakes his head.

“You wish.” Peter snorts. Luke laughs, downing his beer.

-----------

His hands tucked behind his head, staring up at the ceiling. The pit in his chest, opened up and pulled him in. Each time his eyes closed, it was like a replay of home movies. Memories they had, how it was before he went and ripped her world to pieces.

He sits up, pulling his laptop on to the bed. He digs into the bottom drawer of his nightstand. Finally finding what he was looking for. He plugs it in, settling back, pulling a pillow over his chest.

Tucking it into him on his chest as he waits for it to load. He hits play, going back to holding the pillow. Sitting around a bonfire, in Gwen’s backyard. Her acoustic in hand, hair piled up. Gwen sat next to her, her fingers strummed, they sang a Katy Perry song, The One That Got Away. Fitting to how it all went down just a few months later.

The video changes, they’re in the car. Gwen’s driving, Peter in the passenger seat, he sat in back with her. Phone recording, as she sings along to the song playing. Her hair whips around with the breeze, she’s in her own little world. She was his whole damn world.

He slams the laptop closed as the screaming starts. Howie jumps out of bed, throwing the pillow back at his bed. Ripping the door open, he looks both ways.

“GWEN!” Peter screams.

Howie curses, running down the hall. Luke opens his door, their eyes connect before he runs past. Throwing open Peter’s door, his blankets are ripped from the bed. Head rolls from side to side, his body ridged. Night terror hooked deep into him.

“Peter!” Howie grabs his shoulders shaking him once. Peter yells something incoherent. “Peter!” He shakes him a little harder once more. His eyes slam open, terror filled his brown eyes.

“Howie?!” Peter’s grabbing hold of him. Clinging on, hugging him, trying to catch his breath and groundings.

“It’s okay.” Howie spoke softly, breathless himself. “I know. I know, Pete.” Howie hugs his brother back as Peter mutters into his shoulder.

“I was there again.” Peter pants.

“I know. But you’re not. You’re here.” Howie nods, pulling back to look at his older brother.

“Seeing her, it brought it all back.” Peter nods.

“Me too, me too.” He swallows.

“Howie.” Peter shoves his fingers through his disaster hair.

“What?”

“Why did you leave her?” Peter looks up at him as he stands up, backing away.

“Don’t do that.” Howie shakes his head. “Don’t ask those questions.” He swallows.

“How, why won’t you just tell me? You’ve never talked about it.” Peter points out.

“Because I’ve been taking care of you. My shit isn’t important. Keeping you sane is my main job, Peter.” Howie snaps. Peter’s mouth closes, disappointment and guilt on his face.

“How.” He swallows.

“Don’t Peter. You’re my fucking brother. I always put you first. That’s the way we are. Don’t fucking pull at the strings.” He growls at his brother.

“But you’re always important. You’re my little brother.” Peter shakes his head.

“My shit, it doesn’t compare to needing to take care of you. So drop it.” Howie runs his fingers through his hair. “Just try to get some sleep.”

He shakes his head, stalking out of the room. Back to his own, slamming the door shut, finding his laptop half under the pillow. He grabs it shoving it under the bed, dropping down on the bed with an irritated sigh. He falls back, rubbing his hands over his face.

The pit in his chest, dragging him down once more. He finally nodded off with the sound of her singing. It turns to screams, crying, begging. Warm blood on his hands. Peter pleading with God, Gwen motionless, unbreathing. Her blood on their hands.

------------------

Everything Peaches 9/3/19 @mo320 @courtmr @avxgers @eliza-kat @irepeldirt @jordan-ia @jcc04220 @dumblani @nishanki1 @allyp1023 @joannie95 @rogvewitch @rileyloves5 @sarahp879 @sexyvixen7 @doctoranon @queentoffee @abschaffer2 @tony-stank3 @tomhardy41 @bookluver01 @drayshadow @teller258316 @nickimarie94 @wandressfox @cutekittybast @amandab-ftw @carostar2020 @thelostallycat @henrietteoaks @nea90sweetie @circusofchaos @bettercallsabs @miraclesoflove @queenkrissy11 @shield-agent78 @elite4cekalyma @sadyoungadult @destiel-artemis @isabelcrichards @iwillbeinmynest @sweet-honey15 @scooby-doodoo @chanelmadrid13 @killerbumblebee @spookygrantaire @geeksareunique @supernatural508 @itzmegaaaaaaan @optimistic-babes @elizabethaellison @rainbowkisses31 @aspiringtranslator @mariekoukie6661 @pure-princess-97 @capsheadquaters @youclickedthislink @futuremrsb-r-main @lovemarvelousfics @notyourtypicalrose @petersunderoos96 @loving-life-my-way @itsy-bitsy-spidergirl @buckystolemyheart @booktvmoviefangirl @thatpeachybandgirl @supernatural-girl97 @thefridgeismybestie @dumbbitchenergytm

@eggingamazinglove @deathofmissjackson @awkwardfangirl2014 @queenoftheunderdark @laneygthememequeen @writingaworldofmyown @death-unbecomes-you @shann-the-artist-moon @supernaturallover2002 @daughterofthenight117 @mcuwillbethedeathofme @verymuchclosetedfangirl @for-the-love-of-the-fandom @ocaptain-mycaptainmorgan @crazy-little-thing-called-buck @letsgetfuckingsuperwholocked @stupendoussciencenaturepanda @supernatural-strangerthings-1980

Howie 'Damn Boy' Stark: @ml7010 @gabile18 @crayonwriting @callme-barnes @untoasted-ravioli @andycanbeemotional

CB: @coley0823 @csigeoblue @lakamaa12 @hellshedevil @tomhardy41 @ms-rogers06 @wolfiemichele @eridanuswave @tireddork-knight @honey-bee-holly @multifandomgirl-us @eggingamazinglove @badassbeckettswan @fandomsstolemylife00 @dreamingofthenightmarexrhea @jamesbarnesappreciationsociety

#Marvel #OFC!Howie Stark x Reader #Avengers #OFC!Howie x Reader #Cruel Boy #Marvel Fanfiction #OFC!Howie Stark Series #Avengers Fanfiction #OFC!Howie Series

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theyearoftheking · 4 years

Text

Book Forty-Three: Storm of the Century

“Now I know how easy it is to just get... yanked out of the world. I wish I didn’t, but I do...”

It’s been blisteringly, hot-as-balls here in Wisconsin for the past few weeks. It’s gotten to the point the heat is actually making me anxious in a, “Global warming is real, and going to kill us all...” kind of way. To be clear, the recent heat hasn’t just convinced me global warming is a threat. I’m a woman of science. A woman of science who composts and celebrated the fact we’re officially out of plastic grocery bags (we use them for cat litter disposal); and hopefully will never see another one again. Wow. That was quite the overshare. I swear to God, my life is more than celebrating the fact I can now scoop cat poop into paper bags.

Ok, that didn’t help. I’m just going to stop now.

Back to the heat... I’m not going to lie, reading Storm of the Century had me fantasizing about a cold, snowy blizzard. Which, thanks to quarantine, I won’t have to leave the house to go drive in. I kinda hope this whole social distancing thing will extend through March, so I can live in Uggs and leggings all winter long, drink lots of tea, and continue to binge watch Cold Case Files with my daughter. A girl can only dream...

In the introduction, Steve talks about how he wanted to try his hand at a screenplay, and a jailhouse image wouldn’t leave him alone: “...that of a man...sitting on the bunk in his cell, heels drawn up, arms resting on knees, eyes unblinking. This was not a gentle man, or a good man... this was an extremely evil man. Maybe not a man at all.”

I have to give Steve credit for trying a new format, and I thought he was successful. I fully anticipated reading a dry screenplay, full of director’s notes. But instead it was a vividly descriptive screenplay, with plenty of Steve’s humor and snark throughout. For example, “He bends out of the frame, and we hear the SOUND OF VOMITING. (Sort of like the SOUND OF MUSIC, only louder.” and then later on, “He gestures to the girl, who is (pardon the pun) just about CATatonic.” The girl in question, her name is Cat. Groan. But also kind of snort-laugh.

There were also plenty of references to Steve’s universe:

The story is set on Little Tall Island (the former home of Dolores Claiborne)

“There hasn’t been a murder on this island for almost seventy years... unless you counted Dolores Claiborne’s husband, Joe, and that was never proved.”

“Crawl out of the sewer” (It)

“A friendly, grinning, Saint Bernard” (Cujo)

Storm of the Century takes place seventy years after Dolores Claiborne killed her husband. Little Tall Island is bracing themselves for... you guessed it... the snow storm of the century. People are stocking up on groceries, getting the town hall ready in case the island loses power, and picking their babies up from daycare.

While all this hustle and bustle is going on, Andre Linoge bludgeons Martha Clarendon to death with his cane (black, with a silver wolf’s head on the top); while whistling “I’m a little teapot”.

Local kid Davey Hopewell is walking home when he stumbles across the crime scene, and immediately alerts the police. When Constable Mike Anderson arrives on the scene, he finds Linoge calmly waiting to be arrested. Creepy. Of course a murder happens just as a massive snowstorm is starting, and he can’t contact the authorities on the mainland.

Mike tries to get Linoge into the jail, but the door won’t budge. So, he needs to parade him inside the grocery store, to get to the attached jail. While in the grocery store, Linoge locks eyes with a few townsfolk, and spills some dangerous secrets. He seems particularly fascinated with Mike’s son Ralphie. Mike eventually gets him locked in a jail cell, and calls on teams of men to guard the cell.

All hell breaks loose.

Linoge has the ability to visualize a crime from his cell, and have unwilling participants commit it. For example, he has one woman bludgeon her boyfriend to death, and he has one of his guards hang himself. And he keeps leaving little notes everywhere, “Give me what I want, and I’ll go away!”

What Linoge wants is one of the town’s children. He puts them all into a deep sleep, and makes the parents pick which one of the eight children will leave with him. If they can’t decide, or decide not to give him a child, he’s going to kill all the kids. Mike is the only parent that strongly objects to this, but the town (and his wife Molly) quickly overrule him. The parents all pick a stone out of a sack, and whichever parent picks the black stone, loses their child. Of course Molly picks it, and Ralphie leaves with Linoge.

Mike is understandably heartbroken, and leaves Molly and Little Tall Island for San Francisco. One day he’s out getting groceries, and sees an older man and a teenage boy walking down the street singing, “I’m a little teapot.” He’s convinced it’s Ralphie. He chases after them, and Ralphie turns around and snarls, showing him his fangs. Mike decides to leave well enough alone.

And that’s pretty much where the book ends. It was an annoying, and frustrating end: I hate it when the good guys get screwed over without any silver lining. But there was a rather prophetic moment in the book. Mike tells some of the local townspeople, “You know the story about Job? In the Bible? Well, here’s the part that never got written down. After the contest for Job’s soul is over and God wins, Job gets down on his knees and says, “Why did you do this to me, God? All my life, I worshiped You, but You destroyed my livestock, blighted my crops, killed my wife and my children, and gave me a hundred horrible diseases...all because You had a bet going with the devil? Well, okay... but what I want to know, Lord- all your humble servant wants to know is- Why me? So he waits, and just when he’s about made up his mind God isn’t going to answer, a thunderhead forms in the sky, and lightning flashes, and this voice calls down, “Job! I guess there’s just something about you that pisses me off!”

Well, I guess there’s just something about Mike Anderson that pisses God off too.

Overall, I thought the book was good. There were a few loose threads for me: what exactly IS Linoge? Is he a monster like Pennywise, or a villain like Leland Gaunt? Lots of fan sites claim he might be Randall Flagg. And what’s up with the word “Coratan?” That was never really teased out. I also feel like three quarters of the screen play was the lead up, the end felt kind of rushed and unsatisfying. But all in all, it was a quick, fun read. And now I need to watch the television series.

Speaking of television series... there was a character I thought was named Fred Andrews... which made me sniffle, thinking of Luke Perry in Riverdale.

You can imagine how dumb I felt when I realized his name was FERD and not Fred. Selective dyslexia strikes again.

Total Wisconsin Mentions: 28

Total Dark Tower References: 39

Book Grade: B-

Rebecca’s Definitive Ranking of Stephen King Books

The Talisman: A+

Wizard and Glass: A+

Needful Things: A+

The Green Mile: A+

Rose Madder: A+

Misery: A+

Different Seasons: A+

It: A+

Four Past Midnight: A+

The Shining: A-

The Stand: A-

Bag of Bones: A-

The Wastelands: A-

The Drawing of the Three: A-

Dolores Claiborne: A-

Nightmares in the Sky: B+

The Dark Half: B+

Skeleton Crew: B+

The Dead Zone: B+

Nightmares & Dreamscapes: B+

‘Salem’s Lot: B+

Carrie: B+

Creepshow: B+

Storm of the Century: B-

Cycle of the Werewolf: B-

Danse Macabre: B-

The Running Man: C+

Thinner: C+

Dark Visions: C+

The Eyes of the Dragon: C+

The Long Walk: C+

The Gunslinger: C+

Pet Sematary: C+

Firestarter: C+

Rage: C

Desperation: C-

Insomnia: C-

Cujo: C-

Nightshift: C-

Gerald’s Game: D

Roadwork: D

Christine: D

The Tommyknockers: D-

Next up... ugh... I put it off long enough. It’s time to come back to the twisted world of the long-deceased Richard Bachman. It’s time for Regulators. Mount up!

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Until next time, Long Days & Pleasant Nights,

Rebecca

#storm of the century #constant readers #stephen king #dolores claiborne #It #Pennywise #Cujo

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suffering-and-happy-about-it · 4 years

Text

Love Will Take You (Chop and Change, Part 8.)

Series descriprion: Twenty years ago, you’ve given a promise to a boy who claimed to imprint on you. Against your will, you decided to keep it and to visit La Push just to see if anything has changed.

Part summary: This is a cliché fantasy and you will let me live through it.

A/N: So, I was thinking about deviding into two chapters, but I’ve decided against it. It wouldn’t have as much impact. So, it’s kinda long, but also kinda sweet and sometimes even funny.

Also, let me live about Rosalie being a nice character; I love her and I honestly think she’s not the person Midnight Sun tries to convinces us to think she is... Because I simply believe that she had enough of Edward’s mind-reading fuckery and acts ‘shallow’. Also, have a bold Alice, because she isn’t by any means the fragile lady movies want us to believe - she’s pretty badass, tbh. And loving, supporting dad/brother Carlisle? YES by all means.

Inspired by none other than Christina Perri and her Thousand Years (feat. Steve Kazee). (IT STILL SMACKS)

Warning: It’s highly recommended to read the Football Time miniseries first since this contains an unlike pairing which is explained in the series, also the circumstances are given there.

Word counter: 8.7 K

Tagging: @nemodoren. @missdictatorme

Spotify playlist: ✨ Twilight Crackheads ✨

Series masterlist: H E R E

It was way worse than you had imagined. Dear Lord, Alice put every tactic to make you suffer in use. At least the didn't bring the sandpaper and didn't start to brush your skin to make it more... Appealing, if you will. But you've enjoyed Alice giving you so much care.

There was a ton of questions in the evening - are you nervous? Do you think that something will go wrong? (To which Alice answered 'Oh please... With me being the organizer and Emmett the man of honor? Nothing can go wrong.') Are planning some honeymoon? Where will you go? Especially Sue and Leah were carefully tiptoeing around the topics of your nervousness and cold feet. But you just smiled and answered... - "When you know it's the one you want to spend the rest of your life with, nothing can stopping from marrying them." - With this, you looked at Leah who held sleeping Samantha on her chest. She could precisely understand what you had on your mind by saying that. Bella could understand to some extent, but imprinting was a stronger bond than some... Dumb blood singing or whatever she had with sad Ed.

Truly, it couldn't be seen that anyone in the Cullen would be preparing for a wedding. In the morning, when the kids and most of the women woke up, you were still dressed in a velvet robe - trying to stay away from Alice the longest you could. It was your smell that was giving your location away as she dragged you back to her room every time, making you sit on a stool as she prepared you for the whole day. - "You're gonna be so pretty that you'll make him cry." - The small woman jolted with a happy smile, whipping a small make-up brush out. - "He's going to cry either way." - Bella mumbled from reading a lifestyle magazine and Leah, who was just trying on her dress, with Rosalie's assistance, looked at you funny in the mirror. The rest of the women, mostly the moms and their kids, were in the dining room, eating their breakfast. - "Yeah. It's Seth. Wear a potato sack and you'll still make him the happiest." - The Quileute woman rolled her eyes, making you laugh out loud. Rosalie burst out of laughter to the back of her palm, but it wasn't quite enough for Alice to not hear her.

"Oh, stop it." - Alice threw an angry gaze to all of them while simultaneously prepping your hair into a comb, so it wouldn't be in her way. - "This isn't helping. We're gonna make her look the best." - At that, she gave you a warm look, leaning in to quickly kiss your temple with a loving smile. The last member of the family was finally getting married. Oh, Alice couldn't be happier.

To be honest, no-one made Alice take charge of all the wedding preparations - like location, decoration, food, alcohol, DJ, and other things. Alice just told you with a straight face - just the evening after Seth had proposed, but still before you thought about the Volturi when you just got home from your soon-to-be workplace when your phone rang. It was a FaceTime call. From Alice. With a furrow, you picked it up.

Before you could say hi, she started talking. - "So, here's what we're going to do. I was thinking about June, but August will have better weather, therefore," - "Alice, stop for a minute. What the hell are you talking about." - The man turned his head at you from watching the match, curious about the call. - "Seth had proposed, right?" - Alice asked and her eyes widened as if she just told you some secret you weren't supposed to know about. - "Oh, did I just blew his cover? Damn!"

"He proposed, today, yeah." - You answered with a hint of fear in your face. First off, Alice must've seen you in a white dress or something - she couldn't visualize the proposal itself solely because Seth was a werewolf and she... Couldn't see them. Or anyone's when it entwined to a wolf's in some way. She had to see some part of your wedding day in that scenario. - "Well, obviously, I'm calling to tell you what we're going to do, dummy. Don't worry about anything, me, Emmett and Rosalie will gladly assist you with everything." - Something in the way she said everything made you shiver in fear. Seth was watching the exchange with wonder and joy in his face - the wedding was sure to happen. He didn't know where, when or who'll be there, but you will be his... Wife. Someday in the future, of course. - "Alice, stop yourself for a fucking minute. He proposed... Like three hours ago and you're already thinking about a date. Unbelievable."- "We gotta start somewhere. So, I was thinking..." - "Goodbye Alice! Have a nice evening!" - You cried at the screen of your phone, waving at her before you ended the call, putting the phone in quiet mode. Then, you sat next to Seth and cuddled closer, enjoying the personal heating Seth was. - "Goddamn foreseerers, I tell you that." - A low whisper filled the room when Seth kissed your temple, making you scoop even closer. After that, you both paid attention to the football match.

This small road bump didn't stop Alice from taking the creative freedom of starting with planning every small detail. She was sure before you admitted it will be better that way, that she'll be the one who will take care of the planning.

There wasn't anything she could tell for sure - she didn't know who'll drink too much and wolfs out, who won't make it or how the whole day will be overall. But she could see small glimpses and details. The wedding, as most things she planned, eventually became her full-time obsession, just for a few weeks, until the moment she had all the details planned out - especially after the call you've given her. In this call, you've agreed to have Alice as your coordinator. But only if she'd let Emmett be the man of honor. To which she, of course, agreed.

In the end, the wedding was yours. The first time happens only once - and even if you'd decided to renew your wows and the whole marriage after some time, it would never be the same wedding. You were immortal... But what about your family and friends? Jacob didn't seem to be stopping shifting anytime soon, but Sam, Emily, their kids, and kids of their kids? They won't be there anymore.

It was unconventional to have a best man instead of a maid of honor, but it was supposed to be your day. And Seth's day, of course. Alice didn't say a word against it. At first, she tried to tell you a date you should choose, but in the end, she'd be able to prepare the wedding anywhere and anytime. To her pleasure, you, on your free will, picked precisely the day she was interested in.

With making the details regarding you, she had no trouble - she already saw the dress you were about to wear. This time, Alice was more careful with affecting your opinions, showing you many versions of different dresses before settling on the one she already knew you're going to pick. Even if Alice wanted to come to La Push, stay with you, and to talk with you eye-to-eye, you made her talk everything only through FaceTime.

This was making Alice go crazy - you were working in your veterinary clinic, Seth was working at the kindergarten, so she had to wait for most of the days. Yet, more importantly, she had to talk with Seth about everything. Since Alice made up that she'll make sure about every small thing is perfect, she couldn't see him in her visions at all. Small glimpses of you, when the dogs weren't around you, but there was a void other times.

And this led you to the present moment. Alice was playing with your hair in perfect, mechanical movements. She wasn't just making a haircut, she was making the perfect one. Rosalie was helping the other bridesmaids with trying on their dresses, tailoring small details at the last moment.

Bella was sitting on the bed, for the most part, sometimes, she got up and helped the bridesmaids when Alice felt there might a small bump on the road. It never was anything that would create any problem, yet Alice was proud of her parties and weddings were always perfect.

The dress was hanging in a huge plastic bag, carefully leaned into one of the dresser's doors. Emmett was supposed to make sure Sam's place will be beyond ready for your big day. It was supposed to be a nice, breezy late summer day with the sun here and there, so the first thing they were doing was that they put up two high beams in the middle of the meadow next to Sam and Emily's place, covering it in a huge piece of almost invisible, thin fabric. It was just enough to let the light in, but it was a safe bet against any of the vampires shining. A safe, reasonable choice.

The last part of the make-up process was to put the actual make-up on your face. Alice completely covered the mirror in a piece of cloth, painting you like a piece of art. She refused to show you before the women will have a careful look at you - you've been scared when you walked the stairs down, still dressed in the velvet robe, showing yourself to your bridesmaids. Sue started crying even before she saw you and this alone almost made you cry as well. - "Not a chance. You're not ruining this." - Alice mumbled and wiped the tears before they got out. Rosalie was sitting in the back, softened by the overall atmosphere, hiding her small smile. But Leah wasn't. - "I kinda see why my little brother fell for you now. Wow. Alice, you've overdone yourself." - The woman stepped to you, admiring every small touch of Alice's brush. - "Excuse me?" - Sam added from the back with a giggle, making you sure she's just joking. - "You've been the most beautiful woman I've seen, of course, but you have to admit..." - "It suits you. I need to borrow you sometimes, Alice." - Samantha ended the conversation and just before you've been allowed to look at your damn face in the mirror, you heard Alice mumble 'Anytime you need. I'm kinda bored these days' as if she didn't prepare the wedding a whole year ago.

The person you've been looking at in the mirror... It was you, undoubtedly, but each small tap of the brush, every eyeshadow blended and every small spinner she used had their meaning. Damn. You were a hell of a bride. If Seth wouldn't come to see you in front of the priest, he'd be genuinely dumb.

When all of the dresses have been tailored by Rosalie and Nessie, who was more or less just watching the blonde working and everyone had their make-up and hair done, this time, both Bella and Alice put their hands to use, you've set on your way to Sam's.

Emily wasn't comfortable with being one of your bridesmaids, showing her face to everyone. So, gently, you've all told her that she's breath-taking - it wasn't that you'd all just come up to her and just spilled the tea out. No. You all came to her at a different time and told her so subtly she might have not caught it. Yet when you arrived at Sam's, she was glowing with healthy confidence.

The whole meadow was undergoing huge preparations - the dedications were yet to be set, but the seats were prepared. Which was followed by a question, while you and Alice sat in the car alone, waiting for the men to move out of the house for you. - "Dear God, Alice, how many people have you invited?" - You wondered, watching Emmett putting a name tag on each of the seats. His expression reminded you of a small, fifth-grade boy who was doing his homework. - "Most of the seats are just for the people from La Push. Seth has a lot of friends, which might surprise you. You haven't seen them all together? I've sent an invitation to the most members of the pack and their families - and they've accepted. Then, there are seats for your bridesmaids, of course, and their partners. Emmett hotheadedly wanted to be the only one standing behind you. You've allowed this, remember?" - Suddenly, Alice's eyes were on you as her palm gave you a slight idea of which section is meant for whom. - "I did." - "And then, there's the Denali pack."

"You invited these two? Alice!" - It was nothing but an angry hum coming out of your lips. - "They won't come. Or at least they didn't decide yet. It was just decency to show that you care." - "But I don't care." - This one was less angry since Alice didn't see them coming. Dear God, you couldn't stand these sisters, ugh. You didn't even know why you've just... Didn't understand each other from the very beginning. - "Listen to me. Here's what you're going to do." - Suddenly, the small girl was turning you to look her in the eyes.

"I get that you're nervous," - "I'm not." - "You'll be, don't worry. But even through that, you need to make sure that everyone will put their dresses on and help with the rest of the things, yeah? Me, Emmett and Jasper will be working on the decorations and catering." - By the worries in her voice, you'd say it's the most important job in the whole world. It was just putting the dress on, that was it. It wasn't that deep. Alice knew nothing can go wrong, if there was something that could do wrong, she wouldn't leave the house until she would destroy the source of the trouble. - "Sure. Whatever." - You smiled back at her.

At that, you both jumped when Edward knocked on the rolled-up window of Alice's canary yellow Porsche he gave her years ago. Alice turned her eyes at him, nodding with a smile. - "The way's clear." - With that, she opened up the door and let you get off. - "See you there, Canadian." - The small woman whispered before disappearing out of the car like a shadow.

From that moment, Edward was about to help you with the rest of the preparations. Not to look at the women changing, no, just in case the groom would like to get close. Alice could be old-fashioned in this. There was a zero chance Seth would see you beforehand, ruining the big moment at the aisle. Immediately, you went for a hug. - "Hey, how was last night?" - You mumbled, slowly leading him to the house. Edward first grinned at the question before he slipped his palms into his pants and followed you. - "It was... How to describe it... It was wild. Your almost-husband got so drunk we had trouble waking him up." - "Did Jacob took some photos? I would love to see that." - Edward laughed again, now at some memory flashing through his brain. - "Just to the part before he hammered himself." - An unpleasant grunt came out of you. - "I've missed all of the fun, come on. How's he doing? Still sure about what he's doing?" - You asked with a smile as you entered the door. Edward checked that the door is closed before following you deeper into the house.

Once more, it was filled with pleasant chatter and laughter coming from all of your bridesmaids. - "I shouldn't tell you that. It's against the rules, you know? Can you imagine how hard it's for people who don't have any friend who would be reading minds?" - The man asked, watching Bella and Nessie playing with his daughter's hair to fix it in place. - "Ugh, don't be ridiculous. I can't imagine." - "He's just nervous. I've been nervous too, back when I was about to marry Bella. It's nothing. No cold feet, no thoughts about leaving... The man wouldn't stop in front of anything that might get in his way to the priest." - The vampire sighed with a gentle smile lingering on his lips. - "I'm amazed every time I look into the mind of someone, who had imprinted. There's so much love, adoration, endless... The emotion can't be described by words. Trust me, that boy isn't running away anytime soon." - With that, Edward stopped as you entered a full room of women, who already started to put their dress without your help - they must've been instructed by Alice as well.

The time was flying incredibly fast, maybe faster than you were able to realize. And just like Alice told you, you were slowly getting nervous. At first, the feeling snuck just past your radar, until it crept into your head - and since then, you couldn't keep your head straight. What if you weren't pretty enough? What if you change your mind about this? Was this the right choice? Were you sure about what you were doing? Edward, who heard every small thought that passed through your brain, didn't tell you a word about trying to keep it together. Hell, everyone knew you were nervous as hell. Who wouldn't be nervous before getting married?

As the hour was coming closer and closer, as you glanced out od the window, you realized two things - the meadow was finished. Alice did just as she told you - there wasn't a single flower misplaced, the aisle was prepared, the chairs were lined up perfectly, geometrically. You were almost sure that Alice had a sketch of every small detail her visions allowed her to see, and she used all of them now. The second thing you've noticed was that... Almost all of the guests were there, gathering and chattering while slowly finding their seats. You could see Charlie, who was looking at Sue's dress. Paul, Jared, and Jake already appeared there too, all of them dressed up in perfect tuxedos. - "It's here." - You've heard as you watched the people through jalousie. It was Alice, slowly dragging your dress out of the plastic bag. Suddenly, she looked at you and her expression froze for a small minute until she smiled once more. - "Sure, you can run away into the woods, cross the border to Canada and disappear. But you won't do that, come on." - Carefully, Alice held the dress for you and waited there until you slipped your calves and thighs through the skirt before she made sure to put the torso part up.

"What do you know? I can make it, it's not even that far. I can hide so well that you nor Edward won't be able to find me." - You mumbled under your breath, while the small woman's hands worked on the buttons on your back. She was as fast as lightning. Dear Lord, you almost freaked out when you felt the velvet corset hugging your chest. Sure, you almost couldn't feel it on you, it just surprised you that it slipped without any problem. - "You won't do it because you're in love. Come on." - Alice was sure of that. - "But what if I fall and smudge the make-up?"

"Who are you? This is the biggest human thing I've heard you stressing about in years. I have two things that might calm you down." - The woman was now almost finished buttoning up the back of the dress, slowly getting to make the dress merge the right way. It had so many layers. Maybe too many layers. The work regarding laces was extraordinary - you haven't seen a dress made with so much love. Alice surely paid way too much for this - even if you made her pay all of it from your account, you still felt kind of bad for it. - "For starters, you're a vampire, silly. You wouldn't fall and smudge your make up... Ever. Vampires aren't this clumsy, darling. And the other thing is... Carlisle wouldn't let you." - Just when you started to crack a smile, two teenagers from La Push invaded into the room. One of them was holding the camera, obviously making sure the whole wedding was documented. You've heard Alice's murmur - 'Don't worry, we hired a team of professionals as well. But the boys were so excited to do that, I couldn't stop them from doing this.'

The boy interviewed you for a bit, asking about things that were clear as a day - they asked if you're nervous or not, how were you doing so far, it was mostly making you laugh. Maybe way too much, because the nerves and anxious thoughts were now imprinted into your whole behavioral pattern - but when you saw the footage once it was completed, you seemed to be a happy bride who wasn't stressing about anything in the world. In addition to that was when Liam, the younger and taller one, asked you if you love Seth. It was a simple question, but the way you answered was immediate, almost as if you didn't even think about the question at all. As if it was a pure fact.

Soon, you realized why you hear such rumble from the main hall of Sam's house. The bridesmaids and their men were slowly gathering behind each other, standing on couples, as the kindergarten kids did. Alice made the system even for this - there were three couples of vampires and three couple of La Push inhabitants, so she mixed them up as her eye pleased her to - this time, Alice herself was waking the aisle down with Jacob, who was three times bigger than her, Emmett was leading Sue, Jasper paired up with Emily Young and the biggest surprise was when Rosalie agreed to drag Sam Uley down the aisle.

To be honest, these two weren't fond of each other, but when you saw Rosalie, who was scolding Sam down about something and then both of them laughing at the said thing, it just made you grin widely. Any of the Cullens forgot about being on the La Push territory and both parties reminded the others about the smell, yet it was warming something inside you, when you saw them just being friends for the whole time Cullens were there. They were now more than just allies at that moment. - "Time to meet your accompaniment, come on." - Alice jolted almost unexpectedly, making you aware she was there with you the whole time you were staring at everyone from the window.

The guests were slowly sitting down, which told you it's about damn time. But just before you caught a glimpse of your man, Alice dragged you to the door. - "Carlisle? Prepare for the biggest makeover I've done 'til this day!" - The woman cried out. It was borderline rude, but she genuinely was proud of the fact she managed to make you look like a whole different person. - "Here we go." - The small vampire mumbled and opened up the door for you, letting a quiet high-pitched sound of excitement escaping her lips.

And dear Lord, you've stopped yourself when watching Carlisle as well. It's been some time since you've seen him in such clothes like a suit. It wasn't anything too blinding, just a normal suit as far as you were concerned, but it indeed suited him. Someone, whether someone else or Carlisle himself, slicked his hair back without a single one sticking out, and both the shirt and vest were doing him good. How could someone look both younger and older than you at the same time was beyond you at the moment, but Carlisle pulled it off perfectly?

Throughout the whole time, you've had super surprised expressions on your face, trying to decode the whole situation somehow. - "You look great." - You mumbled with a smile, realizing you were doing that. It was just a matter of minutes before you'll be walking down the aisle, giving all the guests a shy smile. - "I should be the one giving you all the compliments today. You look... Gorgeous, without a single doubt." - Carlisle smiled back, ignoring Alice's bragging about being the one who had made you look this good. - "I need to run. I already hear Jacob mumbling because I'm late and that's never a good thing." - Quickly, she kissed your cheek for the last time, smoothing over your shoulders with a small smile. - "You're not going to fall. I promise." - Just like that, Alice was gone and Carlisle was the only one standing there with you. There was a lot of hurly-burly coming from the lower floor, which gave you a sound cue regarding the approaching march.

"Are you that worried about falling?" - Carlisle asked with a hint of joking inside his topaz-like eyes. - "Weren't you when you saw Esme walking down the aisle? I mean, it's not an irrational fear." - You mumbled back at him, carefully entwining your elbow with his. With the other palm, you've picked a few layers of the skirt up, making sure you won't step on it and rip it off. - That's an unfair point. I wasn't thinking about anything other than how beautiful she looks. I was a fool in love back then and I am one even now." - At that, Carlisle finally made you walk forward. Even if you didn't realize at the moment, you've been so stiffened that Carlisle dragged you to at least the start of the stairs. You could hear how your high heels made a few deep grooves into the wood on the floor and you giggled at that. Well, you'll be the one to face Sam's fury later.

"You know, I can still make it to Canada. I'll cross the border in less than an hour." - Your shaky voice informed Carlisle in a whisper, making the blonde man honestly laugh at your concerns about leaving the whole wedding just because you were stressed. - "I know you can." - Carlisle answered back, leaving out the snarky comment about you not being able to do so. For how much hurly-burly came from the lower floor before Carlisle led you onto the top of stairs, now the room became silent. So silent that you'd hear a pin falling. Rosalie tugged on Sam's elbow pretty harshly as she smiled, not realizing she's doing so.

While she and Emmett had more than five weddings and their account and counting, you've been a late bloomer. And a boomer, according to Emmett's alligations. Damn, even sad Edward married sooner than you. But dear Lord, was it worth the waiting. Anyone had seen the dress beforehand, or the sketches, no-one than you, and Alice knew what you were planning to pull out. For a moment, you thought that something might be wrong with you - everyone who was still waiting for their cue was turned at you, scanning you from your toes to your forehead without a hint of what they were thinking. Soon, you saw the tears in Sue's eyes, realizing they most probably liked what they were looking at.

Slowly, another pair walked out of the room, making space in the small kitchen for you and Carlisle. That was the exact moment when all the nervousness kicked in. For a vampire, you've been feeling too much of dynamic emotions that day. At first, you were lethargic, then you got a bit scared, then happy when Liam was interviewing you and now, you were slowly crossing the line of freaking out. Yet as you tried to smoothen the natural looseness of the skirt while Rosalie and Sam were helping out with the flower, you felt Carlisle covering the palm holding his elbow with his. When the last pair your party slowly gathered in front of the exit, while Rosalie and Sam still mumbled jokes to each other, you've looked up to your oldest friend... Just to see him smiling into the distance as the palm continued with smoothing yours. Nervously, you got a better grip on the flower and let out a huffy breath.

How the fuck were you supposed to gather yourself? Did all brides felt this pressure of nerves? Because you felt that something will crush you any minute. How were you supposed to be brave? You could be glad that you didn't feel the other pressures humans usually were going through - like sweating, fainting, fastened breath, and ferocious heartbeat because you wouldn't most likely be standing there on that day anymore. You'd have given up much sooner. It was at this moment you felt as if you weren't courageous in your life before. Running from the Volturi? Playing tackle with the wolves? Going against Emmett in a fistfight? Where was the bravery in that? There wasn't anything more terrifying than having a wedding, you were sure of that. But Carlisle's warm, smooth voice slipped into your ear at the exact moment. - "You're doing good. Trust me. I wouldn't say that you're nervous if you weren't breaking my arm apart." - This made you smile, laugh out loud at the complaint.

"Are you proud of me?" - You asked suddenly, looking him straight in the eyes. Well, if you'd like to say it, you were kinda his mother. But since the physical age between you was barely three years, you were more like his sister. And now, he was portraying the role of his father. It was confusing and complicated for sure, but you wouldn't have it any other way. You were still a member of the family - whether you were looking at it from the changing-Carlisle standpoint or from the fact that most of the Cullens viewed you as a sister or at least a close friend. Just like Chloe, Aaron, and Ariadne - but they were seeing you way often than the tree vampires or other of Carlisle's friends, especially after you moved into La Push. The question you've asked wasn't that out of place. - "I am as proud as a father can be." - Carlisle mumbled back, making your smile even wider.

"I still can't believe he asked you for permission. I mean, it's sweet, but..." - "It's nice. He tried to make the impression here, let's give him that." - Carlisle answered and as you focused on the music for a moment, you've realized in horror that Rosalie and Sam were just entering the aisle themselves. It was your turn now. - "Sure thing, paps." - You whispered without a hint of joking, closing your eyes for a second there to breathe it out. - "Come here." - Carlisle smiled and quickly, without smudging some of the artistry Alice painted on your face or stepping on the dress, the vampire pressed a kiss on your forehead. It was partially for one of the cameras, which was filming all of the main party walking out of the house, but it did help you. - "Thanks." - At that moment, you straightened up and almost freaked out as everyone on the meadow suddenly stood up.

It was here. The music cue said so pretty clearly too - it was time. - "Are you ready?" - Carlisle whispered just before you took the first step forward. - "One can't get ready for this." - You answered when you walked out of the doorframe, making your way to the isle itself. Fuck the cameras, your face looked as if you had stunned farts and you couldn't make yourself smile. The Denali pack hadn't arrived, as Alice told you, but facing the first gazes of people who either lived in La Push and knew you or lived there sometime before, was unnerving. When Carlisle smoothed your palm again, you got the simple hint of that maybe, you should smile at the guests a bit. And so you did, quickly looking at everyone who was sitting there.

Seth had so many friends and pack/family members that some of them took even your part of the chairs. Most of the Cullens were standing alongside their partner, leaning into them with a graceful smile - but there were also people like Charlie Swan, who was hugging Sue's shoulder, quietly crying with her. Seeing this man crying made your bit on your bottom lip, smiling at him happily. This wasn't so hard. No. The hardest part came when you had to look in front of yourself. You did it, slowly, to peak at the men.

First, of course, there was Emmett, covering as much space as he was capable of. His grin was full of teeth, but even through his himbo-like expression, you could see that his eyes were soft. The priest didn't catch your attention for too long - it was just a normal guy on a not-so-normal wedding, that was all. You almost did look at Seth, you did, but you stopped yourself and quickly jumped at Jacob. Was he crying before? Did you just not noticed that? Or did he start crying now? Oh Lord, he was looking like a small girl.

Yet then you noticed why was he crying. It was just a small moment, but the whole world stopped when your eyes jumped at Seth. Since that moment, no-one was there with you. Only the two of you, from now on. You couldn't imagine how would he look in something like a suit, mainly based on the fact that you've never seen him wear anything else than t-shirts and flannel shirts, but you didn't know Seth is capable of looking this good. His hair was masterfully styled, probably by Alice, and he was crying way more than Jacob did.

Suddenly, you could tell that everything will be alright. That the nervousness was just plain nonsense. It was a matter of seconds, but it could be seen that your whole posture shifted, your smile and eyes brightened. It wasn't just the exterior of you that changed - your whole world suddenly put Seth into its center. If Carlisle wasn't holding you in place, you'd have run to Seth, trying to calm him down. Now, you were walking too slow for your liking. All you wanted to do was to make sure he's fine.

But on his defense, you were a breathtaking bride. Before, Seth couldn't quite understand the others when they told him about their weddings, about the wild mix of feelings they've been through the whole day. Now, it all made sense. It was logical. He finally knew what Sam, Jake, and Quil were all talking about. Sure, they hadn't their wedding planned by a maniac, but the feelings were still the same.

You were just inches away when Carlisle slowly planted another kiss on your forehead. With a smile, you gave your flower to Emmett, he looked great holding it, and then you got back to Carlisle and all of those wedding traditions. When the blonde vampire told the priest, that he's indeed the one who is presenting you to the marriage, you gently took the man's palms - just before you scolded him about crying. It was a gentle, loving gesture when you wiped all of the tears. You've been laughing at it with tenderness, so did a lot of the others. Just as you caught his palms again and gave him one of the crooked smiles only you could pull out, the priest started talking.

It would be rude to say that you didn't listen to the priest that much - but you weren't listening at all. Just when you heard that questions were given to you, you shortly said an answer or repeated after the man. The whole time, you made sure you won't glance away, not even for a second. The dark, chocolate eyes were everything you needed to see. And with each passing second, you knew you're doing the right thing. This was the way it was supposed to be.

The wows didn't make much sense for most of the guests, mainly because they were cryptic and filled with inside jokes only you could get, but it made the guests grin nonetheless. When it was Emmett's time to shine with the rings, while Jacob handed you the wows, he made sure he's unmissable. This made you laugh again, just because this was all Emmett and no-one else. He'd be unmissable either way, so what was the point of talking him down?

Shortly after the kiss, to your surprise, it still felt the same, the nervousness was gone out of the window completely. Now, there were no tears and no bad feelings, just a bunch of people laughing and smiling. For a short while, Alice made sure everyone waits in the proximity of Sam's house - they needed to carry in the tables and to prepare other things. If it wasn't his wedding, Seth would most likely join them without a second thought - but the man couldn't keep his eyes from you. - "I wanted to run away." - You said honestly, slowly looking around at the guests. This was the first few moments of silence you had for each other - the congratulations were coming from all directions, everyone wanted to have a short chatter with the new married couple. - "But then I realized what I would be leaving behind." - "I would come after you and dragged you back, don't you worry." - With that, the man took a good look at your all-white dress.

Seth was positive that until that day, she hasn't seen a prettier girl in a wedding dress. That was exactly what all the grooms thought and Seth knew this, since he spent a lot of time in Jacob's mind. Speaking of Jacob, he was just chatting with Bella - and they were laughing at crazy. Bella was also keen on small Sakari, who was a big girl now. The celebratory mood was in the air, and honestly, it was making you smile to see most of the people just standing around, chatting. Because you knew that when the dancing part comes, you and Emmett will show everyone what it meant to dance; after giving your first dance to Seth and the second one to Carlisle, of course.

Alice did a splendid job with planning out the details regarding the dancefloor and the place where people were about to eat their dishes. It was wonderful that even if Emily had a small kitchen in her house, Alice's people managed to cook all of the meals at a rapid pace - let alone the rest of the catering, that was done prior to the ceremony. - "She's a genius." - You muttered out before moving back to the meadow, where everything was ready to be set in place.

As the majority of the wedding go, you've done the things expected of you - eating the first dish together, cutting the cake, breaking a plate (you especially liked this one), and let guests drink and eat something, just before you sat down to listen to the speeches. There also was a small basket with cards, but you wanted to save that one for later. Sure, you were starting to feel uncomfortable in the dress - but there was a threat that if you won't have the speeches first, most of the party will get pretty hammered - at least Edward said that was what Jacob, with Emmett's full support, was about to do. This was a safer option. And you wanted to be filmed dancing your first dance in the expansive dress Alice had bought for you. Well, she let it be tailored according to a list of her wishes, but that wasn't the point.

Dear God, you loved the speech part so much. For the other guests, it might've been too long, yet as long as people had things to say, you were willing to listen. Most of the people kept it short and simple - Sue was talking about Seth growing up and how did that feel like, about the hardships and about how proud she was at that moment. Now she was the one to make you cry while she was crying as well. As you clapped for her with the others, Seth got up and pulled his mom into a big, bear hug. Jacob was talking about meeting you, though he didn't specify that it was such a long time ago and that they were playing football in their spirit animal form - he just mentioned the worries he had at the start, but being thankful he was wrong in you. Cullens probably kept it the shortest - only Emmett went out of his way to talk about your friendship. With an important smile, he rose his glass and toasted to both of you. Once there was nothing to say, Alice finally let the barman mix drinks as others wished him too. There were no worries about the small amount of alcohol; Alice did bring a lot for the La Push friends and Seth's former pack to drink.

The first dance was something. Maybe it was the fact that you and Seth rarely danced, but it could be seen that you were the one leading the dance. You've been preparing for so long, but even if Seth did something wrong, you'd find it rather sweet than something to be mad about. When you saw Carlisle at the dancefloor, you hadn't seen much of him throughout the evening, he was taking pride in you. - "Careful, you might blow up any minute now." - A whisper left your lips when you danced around. He was more adroit with dancing than Seth, but he didn't let you take the lead. For you, the dance was too slow - you couldn't wait for your dance with Emmett. - "I don't care about that. The wedding was beautiful... Esme is taken away. She cried when she saw you, you know?" - "Esme is too nice to me. You have to invite us to your wedding as well." - That was all you wanted to say during the dance, so you just leaned your temple into Carlisle's shoulder, closing your eyes while the music leads your moves.

After that, one would not be able to say the difference between this and a birthday party. But you loved it - the people were fun throughout the whole time, Jared in combination with Paul and Jake were a great bunch, but the drunker they got, the more fun it got. As you expected, soon after you changed into a less binding dress, Emmett was standing right next to you with his tux taken down, offering you a dance. What came after made most of the people widen their eyes.

The huge vampire, who would overpower almost anyone, was throwing you from one side to another. At moments, it almost seemed that Emmett can just tear your arm off your body as he spun you around. Seth was looking at it with terror - more so when he realized you're laughing. - "Don't worry about them. This is their version of an unconventional waltz..." - Edward told Seth with boredom in his voice. He saw this many times. - "Yea, they dance like this at every wedding. I can't recall when they've done it the last time?" - Rosalie joined the conversation, standing next to the groom from the other side. - "It was your wedding, Rose." - "Do you mean the one where she called Tanya a bitch?" - Rosalie asked back immediately and sipped a bit of the champagne, even if she didn't have to pretend anything. Seth, now lured away by the conversation, let his eyes wander off of you and Emmett. Edward was widely grinning into his glass - and Rosalie did so too.

Seth didn't understand their reaction, no matter how hard he was trying to. Why were they grinning at the memory of you, his wife, calling his family member such a word? Edward, hearing Seth's confusion loud and clear, looked back at him. - "It was... Nothing, really." - "Are you crazy? It almost didn't ruin the wedding." - Rosalie said, pretending to be serious, but the sparkles in her eyes disclosed her amusement at the memory. - "Wasn't Alice there to stop them from... This?" - Seth wondered. - "No. She was in Russia back then." - Rosalie smiled. - "The best wedding I've been on, honestly. But don't tell Alice I said that." - But based on the intense gaze Alice gave Rosalie, she already heard her sister.

"The thing is... The Denali pack never sat right with her - and she never sat right with them. It was both-sided from the very start. And, well, it was how it was, they got into a fight because of something Emmett said. I swear that I hadn't seen them leaving so fast before." - Edward explained simply. There wasn't that much into it - it was a conflict that happened more than fifty years ago. - "If you'll be lucky enough, Emmett won't be throwing her over the rooftop." - Rosalie patted Seth's shoulder before offering him her palm. - "As a part of a waltz, I guess?" - Seth mumbled uneasily and Rosalie smiled back at him, nodding at the suspicion. Yes, that indeed happened as well. Emmett had thrown you over the rooftop - truth be told, it was a vampire-only wedding, but there were people now. So, for that, Rosalie hoped you won't get too carried away.

Honestly, your dance with Jake made you laugh so hard you'd swear your muscles hurt from it. He was telling you pretty dumb stories about younger Seth, the bold ones you hadn't heard mixed in as well, wishing you only the best - more than thirteen times during a five-minute-lasting dance. He was hammered - and funny as hell. Both you and Seth decided to stay until the very end of the party, helping with cleaning up everything and driving the drunk guests, as Jake himself, home. Alice promised moving guys to come for all the furniture in the other morning - as well as she promised to come and help them with the whole coordination and moving. It was almost four in the morning when you finally turned off the engine in front of your house. - "Do you think that Esme will take the tradition seriously? She caught the flower and I hope to see their wedding once more. It was magical the last time." - You asked as you got out of the car - you were bringing home all of the cards because neither of you wanted any sorts of gifts from your guests, some spare food and a bottle of booze for Seth. - "She's thinking about traditions while she hasn't done all of the wedding ones herself. What a wife." - The man mumbled to your ear and made you laugh while picking you up from the ground. Seth didn't seem to be bothered with the weight of everything he carried as he stopped in front of the house, looking at the front part with a furrow. - "Through the window or the door?" - He wondered. - "Door. I don't think the window can handle both of us."

Even getting through the door was enough of a puzzle for Seth - since the door and hall in your house was kind of small, he had to figure out how to get in. And it wasn't just some romantic, out of a romance novel cliché - it was filled with your laughter and a lot of curses mumbled under his breath. But after ten minutes of persistent effort, he was putting you down in the kitchen - the only room big enough to do so. - "What do you want to do now?" - The man asked, obviously already having his head filled with scenarios, just to be shut down. You sent him a big smile, though, so Seth was able to get over it. - "I'll go over our cards while you'll have a shower." - And with a peck on his lips, you danced away with the small basked full of cards in your hand.

It was obvious that Sue had written the once she and Charlie gave you, but it was a sweet one nonetheless. Cullens stuck to a pretty similar format, all of them, except Emmett and Rosalie. - "Can I for a second?" - You asked, already opening the door to the bathroom. Then, you dramatically coughed before reading it out loud. - "'Dearest Seth and Y/N. We hope that you have found your lifetime (and longer than that) partner, we sincerely wish you all the best love and happiness, a loving home you'll have to create for yourself, and the sweetest memories.' But now, this is the part Emmett had written and dear God... 'We've taken care of her for a long time, so now, it's your turn, bro. Be patient, loving, care for her and cherish her - because she really is the best sister I've had (don't tell this to the others, I don't want any trouble). Love, Rosalie & Emmett Cullen. P.S.: We hope, from the bottom of our hearts, you'll let us borrow her sometimes, so we can play sports together. P.S.S.: You're invited too, of course. P.S.S.S.: I'm sorry if it sounded like you weren't.'" - You finished their card with a big smile on your face. It was craved in gold, glowy font into the card - so it had to go through Alice's hands, at least. But it was very sweet and very Emmett-like. When you finished reading the card, you've got back to the table.

There was one from Jacob and Jean, with Sakari's big heart on the bottom of it, from Leah and Sam, which was also very sweet - these two were encouraging you to be patient with Seth as well. You couldn't believe how quickly you got over the cards. But there was one you couldn't identify by solely looking at it. With a confused furrow, you picked it up and looked at the red letters. It was an elegant card from an expansive paper and you've surely had seen this handwriting. When you opened up the card, you couldn't breathe and panic overtook you all of a sudden. Alice had to see them. Alice had to know, didn't she?

'To the newly-wedded couple, Seth & Y/N Clearwater.' - The card started formally. It was the second part of it that was scaring the living hell out of you. - 'We wish you all the best - love, happiness, and everlasting life. We will be watching. With best regards - Aro, Marcus & Caius.' - Someone from the Volturi must've snuck the card beyond Alice's visions and Edward's mind-reading. The pack would be alerted if there would be more of them, so maybe it was one of the wedding guests, doing it unknowingly. But it did make you worry about your husband even more. They weren't planning on attacking La Push for now... But if Alice hadn't seen this, what else could fly past her radar? Dear God...

Yet just for that night, you didn't worry about Volterra or Aro, no. You were focused on spending as much time with Seth as you could. You could worry about the vampires on the other morning, couldn't you?

FIN

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avengerscompound · 5 years

Text

Mixology - Bucky and Hope

Mixology - A Captain America Fanfic

Series Masterlist Previous //

Buy me a ☕ Character Pairing: shhh it’s a secret

Word Count: 3723

Series Warnings: Angst, Character death, Breaking up and making up, past trauma, pregnancy, talk of abortion, smut (vaginal sex, fingering, other things)

Synopsis: Steve Rogers comes into your bar and after a night of flirting you take him home. When he leaves the next day you never expect to see him again.

A/N: This fic was written pre-Infinity War. Here’s where it deviates from canon.

Bucky and Hope

Hope Rogers was born at 3.46 am on a Monday night. The labor was long. By the time all 9 pounds 6 ounces of her entered the world you were exhausted and barely conscious. Bucky had been by your side the whole 26 hours. Getting you ice chips. Letting you lean on him as you walked around. When you complained about the heat and stripped off your clothes he didn’t even flinch. He put on board shorts and hopped in the shower with you, letting you sleep against his chest as you sat on a chair and he held the shower head on your lower back. When the shower wasn’t doing it anymore, he took you to a bath and kept your head above water as you dozed between contractions.

He held you while you tried to breastfeed Hope for the first time. When you broke down in tears because all you wanted Steve to be there, he wrapped his arms around you and let you sob into his chest.

You spend a few days in the Avengers compound. Letting the others come and ooh and ahh over Hope. Accepting their help when they offer. Then, much to Tony’s dismay, you and Bucky leave and move into your new home.

Tony has gone above and beyond for you with the house. It’s fully furnished with brand new furnishing. There’s even a nursery set up. Unfortunately, he’d had a mural with Captain America painted on the wall and going in there hurt you so much. Bucky ended up moving the crib and change table into your room with you.

You lie on the bed feeding Hope as Bucky makes her crib up. You keep finding yourself nodding off. The help you’d been getting during the day wasn’t enough to catch up on the exhaustion you feel after waking to feed Hope four times the night before.

Bucky comes over and picks her up, putting her in her crib. You hadn’t even noticed that she’d fallen asleep you were that tired. He leans over you and kisses your temple. “Get some sleep, doll.”

You doze off and wake to the sounds of Hope stirring. You get up to see her looking up at you with her big blue eyes. She takes after you a lot, but she definitely got those from her dad. Or maybe that's just what babies are like and they would settle to their right color later. You pick her up and change her carrying her out to the living room. Bucky is in the kitchen cooking. He’s wearing a tank top and his hair in a bun and is actually singing to himself. You can’t tell but you think it might be Katy Perry. He’s happier than you’ve ever seen him.

“Hey, Buck. Whatcha doin’?” You ask.

He turns and blushes. “I figured we should eat. You hungry?”

“Yeah. Thank you.” You sit at the counter and start making faces at Hope. She makes intense eye contact with you, which you know won’t last long. Bucky serves up the spaghetti with the marinara sauce and salad he’s made and slides it in front of you.

“Oh hey, look at how alert she is,” Bucky says. “Can I hold her while you eat?”

You hand Hope over and Bucky walks around the living room with her, telling her how pretty she is and talking about things he did with Steve when they were kids. You have these mixed feelings. You love seeing Bucky like this. He is like a new man. At the compound, he tried to make himself small and unnoticeable. Less than a day away and he’s how you pictured him when Steve talked about him. Confident and like a small piece of sunshine. But it should be Steve. He shouldn’t be telling Steve’s daughter about her father. Steve should be telling her about his friend.

Before you’ve finished eating Hope starts crying. You go to get up and Bucky comes over and puts his hand on your shoulder. “It’s okay. Finish first. We’ll be fine.”

He takes her out of the room and you rush down your dinner. When Bucky returns Hope is doing that little pathetic sob sound but isn’t crying. You sit down and as you feed her she falls to sleep.

Bucky takes her from you and puts her into bed. When he returns he sits beside you on the couch balancing his plate on his lap. “How are you doing?” He asks.

You shrug. “Am I supposed to have moved on? I feel like everyone expects me to have?”

Bucky frowns. “I don’t think anyone expects that. I know I haven’t moved on.”

You curl up against his arm. “Is this just our life now? You and me in this house, pretending to be normal?”

Bucky laughs. “Doll, I’ll take this over the past 60 years of my life. This is what I want. Just to be me, to be safe and to have someone with me who isn’t terrified of me.”

Your heart suddenly breaks for him. You close your eyes and try and picture what he must have had happened to him. Broken down and stuck back together as a dark shadow of who he was. Tortured. On the run from the people who both loved him and wanted to hurt him for so long. You were two battered souls who had finally come to rest next to each other. Maybe it was time to appreciate the still.

“Being safe is definitely a nice feeling.” I agree.

You and Bucky stay up together until Hope wakes for her 10 o’clock feeding. You put both her and yourself to bed about an hour later and fall asleep immediately.

You wake a few hours later to the sounds of cries. You’re confused for a moment and reach for Steve to comfort him. You then remember that he’s gone. He hasn’t been here for months.

After a few beats to get your bearings, you realize it’s Bucky. Of course, he has nightmares. His life had been up until recently a permanent walking nightmare. He must have been having them this whole time, but the thick walls at the compound hid his cries. Now you just have the thin walls of this house separating you.

You slip out of bed and tiptoe past Hope’s crib and into Bucky’s room.

“No, please. I don’t want to.” He whimpers, thrashing in the bed.

“Shh… Bucky. You’re safe.” You whisper as you approach the bed.

Bucky shakes his head and throws his hands over his head. “Please don’t. I’ll do what you say.”

“Bucky… they’re all gone. You never have to do that again. Shhh…” You sit down on the side of the bed and put your hand on his chest. He flinches at first but slowly he stills. His heartbeat is racing and his breath is coming in fast and shallow. You lie down beside him and wrap your arms around him. “It’s okay, Bucky. You’re safe. And I love you. You don’t have to be scared.”

He stills and his breathing becomes slow and steady. You rest your head on his chest and drift back off to sleep.

You’re woken an hour later by Bucky shifting from underneath you. You realize you can hear the very beginning hiccuping whines of Hope crying. You sit up and Bucky puts his hand on your shoulder.

“It’s okay, doll. I’ll get her. You lie back down.” He says.

You put your head on the pillow and doze back off. Bucky wakes you by touching your shoulder. “She’s been changed and just needs to be fed.” He whispers, laying the infant down beside you. You offer her your breast and she latches on. She drinks making little peeping sounds and opening and closing her fist on your breast.

“Why are you in here?” Bucky asks, keeping his voice low and quiet.

“You were having a nightmare.” You answer.

Bucky hangs his head and looks away from you. “Oh…”

“Steve used to have them too. Every night. He slept better if I was there. Still had them, but I dunno. Not as bad or for as long.” You explain, trying to reassure him.

He turns back to you and looks at you. Trying to assess if you’re lying to him or not. “Steve had them?”

You nod your head and kiss Hope. “Every night.”

“I don’t know what to do to make them stop. I’ve been seeing the psychiatrist. I think what happened to me is beyond her.” Bucky says.

“I don’t mind if you want to sleep in with me. I know that’s not a permanent fix. But I’m not going anywhere.” You offer.

Bucky looks at you expectantly. “You don’t mind?”

You shake your head. “It’s kind of nice. I - I said before… Steve was it for me. I don’t get a happy ending. I don’t want us to be … well, you know. But we can be our own thing. Comfort? A warm body to lie beside. At least until you get your happy ending.”

Bucky leans in and kisses your cheek and then Hope’s. “Don’t give up on the happy ending.”

This becomes your life for the next eight months or so. You and Bucky raising Hope together. Sleeping in the same bed. Making a life out of the scraps available to you. You’re happy. Or at least, you’re not miserable.

Hope grows quickly. Most babies do really. But even compared to most babies she’s a little ahead on the developmental curve. At eight months she can pull herself up on furniture and cruise around. And she can walk if she’s holding someone’s hand. As long as she has something to hold on to.

Tony has you registered as Bucky’s official handler. That means that he can actually leave Avengers property, as long as you’re with him. It gives you just that little bit of extra freedom. The two of you take morning runs pushing Hope in her stroller.

Bucky gets called into work with the Avengers more and more frequently. They seem to start accepting him as one of theirs, instead of seeing him as burden dropped on them by Steve. Getting to see him with Hope and just spending time with him, seeing the man Steve knew. They stopped being scared of him and resenting him, and start enjoying his presence.

Bucky gets home from a mission one night while you were giving Hope her bath. He looks a little battered and bruised and ready for his own bath. He sits down on the edge of the tub and swishes his fingers in the water.

“How’d it go?” You ask.

He shrugs. “It went.” Hope scoots over to him and starts handing Bucky toys, babbling to him. “How about my favorite girls?”

“We’re okay. We worry when you’re on a mission.” You lean up and kiss his cheek.

“I worry when I’m on one too.” He says. He scoots down to the ground and puts his head over the bath. Hope picks up the sponge and starts wiping his face. “Tasha asked me out.”

You try and act completely unsurprised. It doesn’t work it seems.

“Yeah, I know.” He says.

“I thought because of what happened…” You say.

He shrugs. “Yeah, so did I. I wouldn’t forgive me for that.”

“It wasn’t you though, Buck.” You say trying to reassure him.

“Still happened. And god, doll. It was bad. If she’s forgiven me…” He boops Hope on the nose and she starts giggling. “You have no idea what that means to me.”

You rub your hand up and down his back. “Did you say yes?”

Bucky shakes his head. “I told her I’d think about it.”

“Do you like her?” You ask.

“Yeah. She’s really cool. And hot. Well, you know her.” Bucky laughs.

“So say yes.” You say.

He sits back and looks between you and Hope. “You’d be okay with that? I really love you two. I don’t want to lose this.”

You pick Hope up out of the bath and wrap her in a big fluffy towel. “Buck, you can’t be celibate for me. If you have a chance for something you should take it. If anyone deserves it, you do.”

“You deserve it too though,” Bucky says following you out of the room. He takes hope from you and dries her off as you go.

“Bucky, I had it. Grab it while you still can.”

For the next four months, things change again. Bucky and Natasha start seeing each other. They both go slow. There’s a lot of history and none of it was good, but they do really seem to click. After a couple of months, she starts sleeping over and you get your bed back to yourself. He sleeps much better with her than he did with you. You just wish that they weren’t so loud when they had sex.

Bucky is still so devoted to you and Hope though. You’re glad that Natasha isn’t the jealous type because he sticks to you like glue most of the time. Hope starts walking when she’s ten months old. Bucky loves chasing her around the yard. You get a puppy which you name Cookie. All four of you, sometimes five if Natasha is there, chase each other around the yard. It’s as close to real happiness you’ve felt for a long time.

You sit on the stoop blowing bubbles. It’s a Saturday and the snow has melted and the weather is just beginning to warm up again. Cookie and Hope squeal and chase the bubbles around and Bucky scoops her up and swings her above his head.

When you see him coming down the path you think you must be dreaming. Everything starts happening in slow motion. Natasha is behind him and he stops when he sees you and frowns. Natasha whispers something in his ear and he starts moving forward again smiling. You get up and start running. Your movement catches Bucky’s attention and he turns to see what’s happening. He reacts immediately and no sooner are you wrapped in Steve Roger’s arms but Bucky is wrapped around you.

You’re crying before you even realize that it’s happening. “Oh my god. I thought you were dead.” You sob into his chest.

“I thought I’d never see you again.” He replies and you can hear in his voice he’s crying too. You all just stand there holding each other. Natasha standing off slightly awkwardly. After what feels like an eternity you pull away and look up at him.

“Where were you? They said you were dead.” You sniff.

Steve looks at everyone in the yard. For the first time, you notice how battered he looks. He’s lost weight and he’s filthy and bruised. “Come inside. I need to sit.”

You take him inside and while you Bucky and Steve sit on the couch, Natasha goes and makes tea.

Bucky holds Hope on her lap and she wriggles to the floor and toddles around after Cookie. Steve watches her, mesmerized.

“Hope come here, sweetie. Come meet your daddy.” You call, holding your hands out. Hope toddles over and you lift her up and sit her on Steve’s lap.

“Here’s your daughter, Steve. Her name is Hope.” You say.

Steve hugs her and smells the top of her head before breaking down into tears again. “I missed so much.”

You lean your head on his shoulder and rub his leg. Eventually, Hope fusses and he lets her go again and turns to you and Bucky.

“When that blast came at us, Stephen opened a pocket dimension and dragged us into it. It was supposed just be temporary. He can usually move from one to the other, but … I don’t really understand anything that he told me. There were… demons… something about a power exchange.” He shook his head and rubbed his hands down his face. “We had to fight… constantly. Rocket is not easy to get along with for that long. I - we - there was this crystal and they needed it. It was guarded by these - things. Oh god.”

You could see his distress having to relive it and you cup his jaw in your hands and kiss him. He drags your body against his and almost devours you. There is no doubt in your mind that he has been trying to fight his way back to you for the past year and a half. He’s had that time stolen from him. He missed the birth of his daughter. He missed his best friends gradual return to the man he was. And he missed you. You pull back from him and lean your forehead against his. “Are you hungry?”

“No. Tony made me eat on the drive over here.” He answers.

Bucky gets up and scoops Hope up from the floor. “Tasha and I will take Hope for a walk okay? Let you guys get reacquainted.”

Steve gets to his feet and hugs Bucky. “I missed you.” He says, tears pricking his eyes.

Bucky hugs him back, holding Steve like his life depended on it. “Til the end of the line, pal. Now, go take a shower with your girl. You got a good one.”

You lead Steve down to the bathroom. “So Natasha and Bucky?” He asks.

You smile. “Yeah. She calls him James and he calls her Tasha. It’s really cute.”

“Did you…?”

You shake your head. “You know me, Steve. It was hard enough for you to convince me to settle down.”

You enter the bathroom and turn on the shower.

“Bucky lives here?” He asks.

“Yeah. Tony bought it. He wasn’t dealing with being at the compound well, but he’s not allowed to leave Avengers property unless he’s with a handler.” You explain as you start to undress him. “Anyway… he’s been much happier here with me and Hope. And I’m glad he was here. I don’t think I could have done it without him.”

“Thank you, sweetheart. Thank you for taking care of him.” He says, pulling you against him. He sounds so sincere and thankful, you hold yourself against him and you don’t let go until he does.

You lead him into the shower and as he stands under the hot water you pick up a loofa and clean him from head to toe. He has been through hell. You can see his ribs, and there are large scars along his back and down his side. When he’s clean you turn him to face you. Your gentle touching has made his cock rock hard and it leaks precome.

“Steve, no more okay? You’ve given enough. It’s time to just have something for you.” You whisper.

He nods. “I can’t. I can’t do it anymore.”

You wrap your arms around him and he nuzzles into your neck for a moment before lifting you off the ground. He kisses you, pressed against the wall, your legs wrapped around his waist. You melt into him. You thought this would never happen again. That you’d never have him holding you. You’d never feel the touch of his soft lips against yours.

He lifts you onto his shoulders and he nuzzles at your pussy before sucking at your folds. Heat floods your cunt and you moan leaning back against the shower wall bracing yourself on the wall. He laps at you, his tongue flat licking over your entrance and up to your clit. He focuses his tongue on your clit before sucking it into his mouth and flicking his tongue over it. He moans softly as his tongue explores every inch of your pussy. Each muffled grunt expressing his pure pleasure.

You don’t keep quiet either. It’s been too long. You give yourself completely to him. Letting your orgasm come and crash down over you. Your body clenching and your cunt spasming.

He sets you on your feet and kisses you deeply, his hands in your hair. You lick your juices from his lips.

“Let’s go to bed.” He growls. You nod and switch off the water. As soon as you wrap your towel around you he picks you up and moves into the hallway. You point him in direction of your room and he carries you down there.

He drops you on the bed and crawls up between your legs, his fingers go to your pussy stroking up and down. “Do you want me to do the thing with my fingers?” He asks.

You shiver in anticipation. “Yes, please.” You squeak.

He pushes two of his fingers inside of you, curling them and stroking them inside you. Drawing out your wet. You mewl and wriggle underneath him. His lips meet yours again, his tongue pushes into your mouth and you yield to him. Giving him complete access to you.

Your head fogs and a third finger enters you. He drags them over your g-spot again and again. You feel like you’re on fire. You arch of the mattress and moan his name. “Oh god, Steve. Please.”

He spreads his fingers inside you. “Feel that?” He growls.

“No bigger than that.” You whimper.

He looks into your eyes, a soft smile on his lips. “That’s right.”

“Oh god, I love you, Steve. Don’t ever leave me again.” You squeak and pull him down into a kiss.

While you kiss, he pulls his fingers away and his cock thrusts into you. You gasp as he fills you. Clinging to his back. He rests his forehead on yours. Staring into each other’s eyes. Breathing each other’s air. You slip your hand down in between the two of you and stroke from his shaft to your clit.

You both come apart. You cry out, grasping at him. He moans your name as he comes inside you in quick pulses.

You lie holding each other until his cock stills. He rolls onto his side and strokes his fingers over your belly.

“I’m sorry I left you alone.” He says, his eyes darting away from you.

You touch his cheek. “Don’t worry about that. You lost time again Steve. Let’s just make it up.”

He nods and you snuggle up against him. “I see you, Steve Rogers.” You whisper.

He smiles. “I see you too, Mrs. Rogers.”

~ END ~

#steve rogers #steve rogers x reader #captain america #captain america fanfic #fanfic #fanfiction #reader insert #smut #angst #mixology #bucky and hope

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future-dregs · 4 years

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The Music of K/S

Kirk's perspective --------------- You Might Think, The Cars What About Love, Heart You Make Me Smile, Uncle Kracker Let My Love Open the Door, Pete Townshend You've Lost That Lovin' Feelin', The Righteous Brothers TMP Ebony Eyes, Bob Welch Seasons Change, Exposé, TMP Second Chance, .38 Special, TMP 1,2,3,4, Gloria Estafan Dreamin', Cliff Richard The Longest Time, Billy Joel I Won't Hurt You, The West Coast Pop Art Experimental Band More Than You Know, Axwell/Ingrosso Pink in the Night, Mitski He's So Shy, The Pointer Sisters Faith, George Michael If I Could Turn Back Time, Cher, TMP Kiss On My List, Hall & Oats I'd Love Making Love to You, Leonard Nimoy Every Time You Go Sway, Paul Young, pre motion picture Hole in My Heart, Luke Friend, TMP I'll Be There, Jackson 5 Babe, Styx Being With You, Smoky Robinson Right Here Waiting, Richard Marx Are You Lonesome Tonight, Elvis Presley I'll Be Around, The Spanners Dance with Me, Orleans Foolish Heart, Steve Perry All I Want, Kodaline, after TWOK Geyser, Mitski I Wanted You to Feel the Same, The Radio Dept. TMP Talking in Your Sleep, The Romantics Betcha By Golly Wow, The Stylistics We've Got Tonight, Bob Seger and the Silver Bullet Band When I Need You, Leo Sayer You Make Loving Fun, Fleetwood Mac If You Leave Me Now, Chicago Somebody, Bryan Adams Eternal Flame, The Bangles Open Arms, Journey I guess that's why they call it the blues, Elton John

Spock's perspective ----------------- I Need Your Love, Calvin Harris Anchor, Mindy Gledhill You've Made Me So Very Happy, Blood, Sweat, and Tears Sunny, Bobby Hebb Like a Prayer, Madonna Glad You Came, The Wanted All For You, Sister Hazel Words Get in the Way, Gloria Estafan, five year mission before TMP Sister Golden Hair, America Atlantis, STRFCKR Lovergirl, Teena Marie Lucky Star, Madonna In Your Eyes, Peter Gabriel You Are My Sunshine You Don't Know Me, Ray Charles What's Love Got to Do With It, Tina Turner Love Will Keep Us Together, Captain and Tennille So Emotional, Whitney Houston Sunshine of My Life, Carmen McRae Take Me Home, Phil Collins, mix of movies 3 & 4 I Do Adore, Mindy Gledhill Hard to Say I'm Sorry, Chicago, after TMP Lullaby, Dixie Chicks Goodnight Sweetheart, Dean Martin, spock prime, alone Lady, Styx Nothin' at All, Heart Your Smiling Face, James Taylor Can't Fight This Feeling, REO Speedwagon Forever Young, Rod Stewart, Spock, when he is left alone Laughter Lines, Bastille, Spock telling AOS Kirk about TOS Kirk Then He Kissed Me, The Crystals The Tide is High, Blondie Maybe I'm Amazed, Paul McCartney Affair of the Heart, Rick Springfield Sunflower, Post Malone I'd Like to Walk Around in Your Mind, Vashti Bunyan The Wonder of You, Elvis Presley Throwing it All Away, Genesis, when he is dying TWOK Lady, Commodores

Both/ spirk in general ----------------- Mirror, Justin Timberlake You Are the One, Firefall We Are Stars, The Pierces The Time of My Life, Bill Medley Heaven, Bryan Adams Say You, Say Me, Lionel Ritchie Who's in Your Heart Now, Studio Killers Funky at Heart, Studio Killers We Belong, Pat Benatar It Was You, Ashley Ballard You're Still the One, OMS Could It Be I'm Falling in Love, The Spinners Give a Little Bit, Supertramp Oh Boy!, Buddy Holly Nothing's Gonna Stop Us Now, Jefferson Starship You're the Inspiration, Chicago Something About You, Level 42

#Kirk #spock #space husbands #k/s #star trek #star trek tos #music #own meta #whenever I would hear a song that reminded me of them I would write it down

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queer-disabled-activist · 3 years

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OMG

LOOK!

LOOK AT THIS

IT IS BEAUTIFUL 😩😩😩😩 Thank you Raymond Boczek for posting these on insta because it is heaven✨✨

#steve perry #neal schon #journey band #no i won’t stop talking about journey #no i won’t stop talking about steve perry #rambling

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belladonnaandulriched · 4 years

Photo

artwork by badmotorartist on instagram; do not repost without her permission

the mirror never lies | chapter two: far from home

Joey’s point of view

Let's see, this is my first tour of Europe—it's kinda weird being here and not knowing a soul. No matter if they're speaking English or French or German, it all feels so alien.

We're just five guys who are far from home, clear across the Atlantic. On the flight en route to Great Britain, I kept wanting a rear view mirror right next to Frankie and me so we could watch New York City drift back in the cloud bank and with the curvature of the earth.

Someone, I think it was Scott who said this to me, that Lars came to the United States with that very prospect behind him. And he went further than us, out to California. That little Danish kid with that round moonlike face.

Danish… Danishes? I'm hungry.

Another really weird thing about this continent is the light in the sky. Since it's September, and winter is coming for us all here, the sun is setting sooner and the sky here is dark as anything in existence. When we were in Cardiff, I stood before the rail of the porch outside of our hotel room with my hands in the pockets of my jeans, and I just stood there to feel the breeze run through my hair. Dan told me my hair, in particular the curls atop my head blended in with the darkness so I looked like a ghost there on the porch.

I hadn't eaten anything at that point of him saying that, either. I looked at myself in the mirror afterwards to find my face was in fact kinda pale. Pale enough to make my brown eyes stick out like big black holes.

I have this nose on my face, too. This beak of a nose which my dad describes as a “true Roman”, except we're from around the Tuscan area and not Rome. When I was getting older and things were changing with me, my aunt told me I look distinguished with it. A true Italian boy fused with the earth of the Iroquois.

A true Italian boy with two other Italian guys, two Jewish guys, a Danish guy, a Filipino guy, and two white guys. Thus, the world of metal!

I do in fact love this whole mindset that anyone and everyone can be a part of the world of metal. I really do, it makes me feel like I'm a part of something greater than myself, and with my voice working for the other four guys behind me, we can stand out from the rest.

But every so often I'll find an offhand sign or signal around me that tells me otherwise.

When we toured in Wales, I found myself watching a couple of girls on the sidewalk. The five of us were across the street from them, and I don't think Frankie paid any attention to the blonde—he likes blondes, too. At least, that's what I'm told.

The brunette was cute: she kind of looked like me with her big brown eyes and her wavy dark hair down to her waist. She wore this frilly low cut blouse with a neckline lined with white lace, just a total girl. She looked at me, for something like a minute. I was bit of a mess, too: my hair was still wet from my shower and I neglected to brush it. Nothin' fancy in the wardrobe department, either, just my jacket and my jeans and my Chucks.

But I felt it. She was interested. But then I flashed her a grin and a nod of the head, kinda being Mr. Sexy Italian American, and that look of interest turned into a look of disgust. She even dropped her gaze to my ankles and scanned me like she looked on at the grotesque before she and her friend sauntered away.

Yeah, that sucked. She was cute, too!

Two days ago, we had our stop in London, and I ran into her in a pub. She had on these big ass hoop earrings about the size of a tangerine and her black hair smelled like strawberries—alright, I'm getting really hungry thinking about this now. If no one's going to give me fruit while I'm sitting here and waiting for dinner, I might have to get up and find some for myself.

Anyway, Scott, Frankie, and I bellied up to stools before the bar and she just so happened to be right there right next to me. She gasped when she saw me—it wasn't like I was creepin' on her, though. But she showed a nervous smile at me.

“How ya doin'?” I greeted her; I was still kind of a mess from the few days before.

“I am good, thank you,” she said—that Welsh accent hit me like a truck.

“I'm Joey—would it be alright if I get ya a drink?”

“I would like that very much, thank you,” she replied, “I'm Jessica. Everyone calls me Jessie.”

“The amazing Jessie!” I declared as Frankie started breaking peanut shells right next to me.

“I like your accent—American, right?”

“Upstate New York. Kinda misunderstood and out of the way like beautiful Wales and the cute brunette from there.” That got a giggle out of her. She was about to say something when the big hulk of a bartender at the end of the bar gestured these two big fat fingers at the four of us.

“I'll get to you guys in a second,” he told us in a snippy tone, and then she turned to me and her. “Oi, Jessica! Don't hang out with that loser, will ya?”

That's what the bartender said.

I soon found out thereafter that that bartender was her boyfriend.

She not only had a guy in her life but he called me a loser and she bought into it with her sliding away from me with an uncomfortable look on her face.

You know, I look at a guy like John Bush and I overhear Scott and Charlie talking about him in a good light, to which I have no problem with, but there's this nagging feeling inside of me. John's got that deep full voice and I have this lightweight tenor choir boy thing going like my hero Steve Perry.

I might not look it, but there's a part of me that wishes I could sing like him.

He's bigger than me, too. I don't want to feel like this towards a guy I met like just the other day. I don't want to feel like this towards anyone, if I'm honest. It's not good. But it's there, like I feel it within me. There's no denying it.

I mean, look at me: I'm this skinny guy from upstate New York, from the shore of the lake—I might as well as be a water creature. I debate between brushing my hair and not even bothering because it's only going to get messy again. I literally lost count how many times I've been told that I'm too skinny. God... I've been trying to put on weight since I was a prepubescent teen with a hockey stick on my back, and it just doesn't do shit for me. Even with these sinewy muscles on my arms and on my thighs, I couldn't do it if it killed me.

I couldn't do it if it killed me, even as I'm looking on at this buffet, this Swedish smorgasbord before me. All the Swedish meatballs and those “princess cakes” as Lars called them. It all looks so good and decadent.

But I'm standing there contemplating grabbing a plate and hearing that over and over again in my memory is leaving a pit in my stomach.

This is a terrible idea, but I won't eat tonight. I don't think I could, either. Hearing and reminiscing on all of that pithy chit chat has made me lose my appetite.

I'm supposed to be welcome here. I'm supposed to be here. I keep telling myself that, too: “Joe, you're supposed to be here, you idiot. Knock this shit off or it could land you in a bad place.”

But words hurt. Words cut through you like a sharp knife, especially when you don't know when it's coming or if it'll hit you hard enough. I've lost a couple of teeth from getting smacked in the face with a hockey puck and I've gotten cuts on my legs from the blades on my skates and falling on ice, but words dig under the skin.

It doesn't look like Lars is eating, either. He's just standing there in Metallica's corner with his glass in his hand.

And nothing else.

#the mirror never lies #the mirror never lies fanfic #anthrax #anthrax fanfic #joey belladonna #joey belladonna fanfic #fanfic #fanfiction #chapter 2 #also on ao3 #text #at land's end

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starkerforlife6969 · 5 years

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Starker - I go back to You

High school AU: After Peter and Tony break up, Tony tries to get his baby back.

TW: Mentions of cheating and violence, but with a happy ending :)

Steve lets him know with a sympathetic expression and kind eyes that he saw Peter take Stephen upstairs about fifteen minutes ago.

He’s all blind rage and fury as he storms over the drunk people cheering some out dated sports chant on the stairs, and he bursts into three different bedrooms all on varying degrees of make out- one room is quite clearly a first kiss, the second one stinks of weed and sex, and the third one is full of sweaty grunts.

But the fourth one is the one he cares about.

He shoves the door open and Peter and Stephen pull apart in surprise.

Tony sees red. Peter, his Peter, all flushed- shirt half way unbuttoned, lips bitten red and hair all mussed, and Stephen, lips a little wet but otherwise as infuriatingly put together as always and Tony can’t wait to punch him into a bloody pulp. He takes two strides forward, reaching for Stephen’s top when Peter jumps in front him protectively- all indignant outrage.

“Tony! What are you doing here?” He accuses, a red flush across his gorgeous nose and Tony’s anger gives way in a sudden crest of pain.

“Bruce told me you were gonna be here tonight,” here, Natasha’s pool party. The perfect way to celebrate the end of finals, there were two other parties happening tonight and Tony hadn’t known which one Peter was gonna be at. He needs to talk to him, has to explain- he turns to Stephen who looks half petrified and half angry on Peter’s behalf. “You.” He growls, “leave.”

Stephen almost makes to stand up before Peter puts a firm hand on his shoulder and keeps him sat on the edge of the bed. “No, Stephen, you don’t have to do what he says,” Peter whispers, turning back to Tony angrily. “What are you doing here, Tony?”

Tony’s throat feels dry and he has to work it a few times, reaching out to touch Peter’s neck with trembling fingertips the way he used to. Back when they were together and everything was good. “I miss you, baby,” he whispers, wrecked. “I know, I know I fucked up, but I’m sorry, I can’t- I can’t bear the thought of you with someone else. Please, please, please forgive me, I-“

“If he wants you to leave,” Stephen interrupts, voice wavering but brave. “You should leave.”

Anger, quick as a flash, comes back and he sneers at Stephen. “Oh yeah? What are you gonna do about it?”

“I’ll-I’ll-“ Stephen gets to his feet, but he’s tall and wiry, and Tony is broad and muscular, and he knows he’ll win in a fight-

“No! Stop it!” Peter cries, distress on all his beautiful features. He turns to Tony with a gentler look, and shakes his head. “Tony,” he whispers pleadingly, “leave. For me.”

He doesn’t wanna leave. He wants to be here with Peter, where he belongs. He wants to punch Stephen and his self-righteous face so hard his own knuckles bruise. But-but- self-loathing swarms inside him. Peter doesn’t want him here. Peter hasn’t forgiven him, Peter’s ready to move on- move on to someone else and Tony can feel tears start to burn furiously in his eyes and he can see Stephen stare in shock. Peter’s not shocked though, he’s seen Tony cry before. Peter looks sad and small just like he did when he saw Tony and some girl he can’t even remember. He’d been so drunk, he hadn’t meant it, he- he can’t make up for it. Great. Now Stephen knows he cries just like everyone else, and- Peter makes another small, pleading sound and Tony feels the pain rise to an intolerable level, and he nods.

“Okay, baby,” he whispers, voice hitching. “For you.”

A perfect tear drop slides down Peter’s cheek and Tony hates himself more. Has he caused that? Has he caused his baby more pain, again?

Well, he won’t anymore. He turns to Stephen, wiping his face with his denim sleeve harshly. “You treat him right,” he hisses warningly, and Stephen looks utterly bewildered but also devoutly serious. Maybe he’ll be able to love Peter the way Peter deserves to be loved. “You fucking- you fucking cherish him.” Tony snarls, tears slipping out despite his best control, “because Peter is- he’s the kindest person, and he’s- he’s sensitive and deep in a way that people don’t- they don’t realise and-“ he breaks off into a harsh sob, and Peter whimpers; crying earnestly now.

Stephen swallows hard and reaches out to touch Tony’s shoulder. Tony wants to shrug him off, but he doesn’t. He takes the small comfort for what it is, before turning and leaving.

Steve’s sympathetic face nods at him as he leaves. The music is blasting and there are people screaming happily from the poolside, a few people shout Tony’s name drunkenly, but he ignores them, and lets the biting cold try to numb the twisting heartache.

The night air is chilly, and in his black jeans and denim jacket, he relishes in it, and tips his face up towards the stars and wonders if the pain will ever go away. He wonders if there is anything he can do to make this right, or if the only thing is to…is to let Peter be happy with someone who isn’t him. Someone like Stephen.

“Tony,” comes a breathless, blubbering, choked out hiccup, and he spins to see Peter: eyes all rimmed red, chest heaving and arms out in that way he used to do when all he wanted was Tony to lift him into his arms and make everything better.

That’s what Tony does now. Runs to him and picks him up and breathes him in, peppering kisses onto his neck and whispering vows as Peter clutches him. His heart is pumping with disbelief, and Peter wraps his arms tight around him and whispers wetly into his ear:

“Don’t hurt me again, Tony, please,” he sobs, “I love you, I love you, and you can’t do that to me again-“

“I won’t,” Tony swears vehemently, “I won’t, baby, I-god- I swear, I won’t.”

They hold each other till the cold air becomes too much, and then Tony guides them to his car, and Peter splutters out a laugh when he sees the cheesy, science bumper sticker. The bad joke and the poor quality are almost enough to lower the overall aesthetic of the gorgeous car, but Tony wouldn’t remove it in all the world because Peter had given it to him.

“I’m so sorry,” Tony says again, as they look over the hood of the car at each other. They’re outlined by the night and the stars.

Peter sniffles and wipes his face, his fingers a little red from the cold. His brown eyes shine hopefully. “I know you are,” he whispers, “but I also know you really love me.”

Tony nods so hard he thinks he might snap something. “I love you so much.”

Peter lets out a little giggle, the way he used to laugh whenever Tony licked his collarbones, or nipped at his fingertips. “We should get pizza,” Peter offers, tugging open the door and sliding into the passenger seat in a move so elegant and familiar Tony feels whole again.

He slides in too, and starts the car. “Perry’s?” He asks. It’s Peter’s favourite. He had also liked- “with cheese in the crust?”

Peter smiles; pleased, and he nods shyly. It’s the same smile from when Tony used to leave him little notes in his locker, the smile whenever he saw Tony at the end of his drive in the mornings to drive him to school. It’s a smile that Tony thought he’d lost the privilege to ever see again. It’s a smile he won’t ever take for granted. “With cheese in the crust,” he nods, and then as Tony pulls out onto the main road and heads for the city, Peter reaches out and threads their fingers together over the gearbox.

Just like he used to.

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loyolahcmass · 4 years

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Homily on Don’t Stop Believin’ by Journey

This week Fr. Rossi will be talking about the song Don’t Stop Believing by Journey! Here is the preview of his homily:

“Don’t Stop Believin’" “It goes on and on and on and on.” Journey Thirty-nine years after its release, "Don't Stop Believin'" is still the go-to anthem for perseverance. It has successfully ridden wave after new wave of music trends. Though born in the era of rock radio, the song found its real glory at the dawn of the smartphone. And it has woven its way into weddings, bar mitzvahs, graduations, the 2005 World Series, The Sopranos and Glee. __________ "Don't Stop Believin'" holds the record as the most downloaded song of the 20th-century. And it has nearly 800 million streams on Spotify. What is it about this track that just won't stop? __________ The backstory begins with Journey keyboardist Jonathan Cain. In the late 1970s, he was a struggling rocker in LA. Ready to call it quits, he thought about moving back to his hometown, Chicago. __________ Cain says everything had been going wrong. He and his girlfriend had split up. And he'd had to pay a costly vet bill to save his dog after it was hit by a car. __________ "I called my father for some money". "I said, 'Dad, I'm out of cash here. ... Should I come home? “This thing is just not, you know, panning out?' __________ “And he told me, 'I’ve always had a vision, son. “Don't stop believing.' “I had a lyric book next to me, and I wrote down his words." __________ Things started looking up for the musician after that. Cain found himself in a band opening up for the mega-act Journey. Then, Journey itself poached him. __________ In 1981, when the band was recording its album Escape, lead singer Steve Perry asked Cain to come up with a final track. Cain still had his dad's advice in his old lyric book and from it drew inspiration for the keep-the-faith song. The aspiring characters in the first verse, a small-town girl and a South Detroit city boy, are now familiar to everybody. As for the singer in the smoky room with wine and cheap perfume, that image evokes the desperation Cain felt at a Sunset Strip bar during his rough Los Angeles days. __________ "I really believe this song is about wanting to make it," he says, “Not just make it big, like a star". “But when you think you're stuck in life, when your soul seems lost, but you won’t give up. __________ “Even before most people discover 'Don't Stop Believin,' I think it’s their motto. “You know, to never stop believing in something greater than yourself. “Through all the tough times, you never stop believing miraculous things can happen in your life." __________ “That kind of faith’s got universal appeal. “Everybody wants to hope. “Everybody wants to believe.” __________ On social media, you can still find plenty of photos of stop signs playfully defaced with the song’s title. Those “streetlight people” had a point. “Don't Stop Believin" goes on and on, because we need it to. __________ And that’s why Easter goes on and on as well. Not after a mere 40 years like the song. But 2,000 years and counting, even in the midst of a pandemic. __________ Last week, I was driving through the Hampden neighborhood of Baltimore. One house was completely decked out for Easter. This family decorates for every holiday — Christmas, Thanksgiving, Halloween, St. Patrick’s Day, you name it. Often, it’s lit up at night, which is a sight I look forward to. __________ Still, there was something incongruous about the decorations this time. Not that they were early, even though we were not yet at Palm Sunday. And I really didn’t mind that the decorations were all pastel bunnies and chicks. Let’s face it. Easter is a difficult season to decorate for, if you want to focus on “The Reason for the Season.” __________ No, the incongruity was the cheeriness of it all in the midst of COVID-19. I say this with no criticism, only gratitude for a family making the effort to hope in a time that emphatically doesn’t evoke cheeriness. It’s one thing to find meaning in a pandemic in light of Lent, a penitential time, but Easter seems ill-suited. __________ Yet, I find perspective in the fact that this is the world that Jesus found. And, not only to inhabit, but to heal. After all, disease and misery were far more prevalent in his time. __________ “Christ had to rise from the dead.” Gospel of John Jesus came into the world so that we might have life and have it to the fullest. He went about preaching and healing as signs of what was to come. He didn’t heal all the world’s illnesses or raise all who were dying. __________ No, his healing was a sign that there was something more to believe in. Much more! You know, the “more” that Journey is telling us “Don’t Stop Believin’” in. __________ So, let’s find a way to celebrate Easter — in the deeper meaning of the Resurrection, as well as in the cheeriness of the bunnies and the chicks. Even if we have to do it from 6 feet apart.

#don't stop believin #don't stop believin journey #journey don't stop believin #don't stop believin'#journey #homilies #homily #catholic homily #Catholic Mass #hcm homilies #loyolahcmass

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lululawrence · 5 years

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2017 Fics Written by lululawrence (2/2)

Master Fic Masterpost / Buy me a Coffee?

(And Things Will Be) Hard At Times (35k)

Louis and Nathan had been talking about marriage and kids and a family for years now, but it had never felt right. If anything, the talking about it had petered out over the past while because they were busy living the lives they had settled into. It wasn’t that they didn’t think they’d ever have kids, just that they weren’t to a point where they were ready for it yet.

Well. Ready or not, it was happening.

Or the one where Louis and his boyfriend of five years unexpectedly find themselves pregnant and Harry is the paternity photographer that makes everyone think twice.

Wait for the End to Change (8k)

Harry was running late. He was running late, because apparently his electricity had been turned off overnight, which had caused his phone to not charge, which meant it died and the alarm didn’t go off. He would have just kept sleeping if it hadn’t been for the paper thin walls and his neighbor’s alarm being horribly loud. Anyway.

Harry took his second sip of his glorious morning coffee when someone biked past him and hit him with their bag. It jostled him enough to pour the hot coffee all down his front, staining his work shirt and trousers.

“Sorry!” the cyclist called over his shoulder, and Harry just stood there, staring at his ruined outfit. Maybe he should just go home, climb back into bed, and see if he could try starting the day over again.

Or the one where Harry has the Worst Day that won't stop haunting him, but Louis might be more than just the silver lining.

If It's Meant To Be (It'll Be, It'll Be) (4k)

“So, anyway. I’m done here and on my way to the airport. I think I’m expected to be there in the morning, around ten. I’ll let you know when I’m getting close.”

“Sounds good.” Harry pulled back from the window and threw himself onto one of the beds. Once he got comfortable, he steeled himself and then went for it. “It’s been too long this time, Lou,” he finally whispered. He watched as Louis bit his lip and nodded slowly.

“I know,” Louis agreed, just as quiet in return. “We have to swear to never go this long without seeing each other again. Two months is just...unacceptable. I’m gonna go now, but I’ll see you soon. ‘Kay?”

“Yeah. See you. Be safe,” Harry said, far too fondly for his best friend. He couldn’t help it though. It was how he always had been and probably always would be.

They hung up and Harry threw his arm over his face.

“I am so in love with him,” he whined to himself. “Fuck.”

You Can Read Me Anything (7k)

“So wait, why are you upset over having five classes so far with Louis?”

Harry heaved a dramatic sigh. “Because! It’s so exhausting trying to pretend to be somewhat cool all the time, Li!”

Liam stared at Harry, obviously unamused. “For Merlin’s sake,” he muttered before standing from the table. “I don’t have time to deal with this.”

Or...the one where Harry has pined over Louis from afar, but his sixth year at Hogwarts is when it all changes.

(This Could Be Forever) Right Now (3k)

From the time Mrs. Barkley met them as unruly and hyper twelve year olds in middle school, she took them under her wing. She’d breathed color and hope into their dreams, helped them realize that they could actually go out and attain them. When everyone else was telling them to be realistic and see that their future was just like everyone else’s, she taught them how to do what they needed to in order to get out of their beautiful, homely, loving town.

And now, the woman who had taught all of them such important lessons, the woman who had never failed to send them birthday cards no matter where they were scattered around the country, the woman they’d call in addition to their moms on Mother’s Day, she was gone.

Or the one where OT5 are back together in their small hometown for just one day and maybe that's the perfect time for Harry and Louis to do more than just reminisce.

Will Love Be There (14k)

Louis didn’t care who he had to pay or how much, but he was pretty sure he would give his entire life’s savings and a year’s salary if it meant that whatever was causing someone’s fucking phone to ring would stop.

The person calling must have gone to voicemail, because it stopped ringing and vibrating, but it started up again almost immediately.

“Make it stop,” Louis whined. He lifted his head enough to pull the pillow out from beneath it and smothered his head to dull the sound. “Oh shit, I think I’m gonna puke.”

“Just be sure to get out of bed first, please,” a deep, gravelly voice said from right beside Louis.

“Holy fucking shit!” Louis cried in surprise as he shot up in bed.

Or the one where Louis attends a Steve Aoki concert and accidentally ends up with a husband.

With You In Your Dreams (5k)

“And how are you boys doing?” Professor Trelawney asked as she came to their table. Her wide eyes blinked at the two of them before peeking into the cup. “Ooh, a heart! How interesting…”

Harry’s eyes widened and he looked at Louis. Louis was just looking into the cup in interest. “Should I note that as well, then?”

“Absolutely, Tomlinson. What others do you have?” Trelawney looked at his scroll and she let out an overdramatic gasp. “Oh my my. It looks like someone definitely has love in their future! Those signs all stand for love, marriage, stability, togetherness, and when combined like this predominantly new love! Very interesting reading you’ve done there, Mr. Styles.”

She gave a wink at Harry and then whisked herself off to the next table.

Or the one where Professor Trelawney plays a very unlikely matchmaker.

Couldn't See Past Me, Till I Saw You (13k)

“Look at us, living the dream,” Louis said softly. “But Harry, I don’t know if I’m going to be able to finish my last semester with the baby. I don’t know how far along I am or anything. And what about my internship and all of that?”

Harry shook his head emphatically and pulled back once more from Louis, this time placing his large, strong hands on Louis’ shoulders and squeezing them tight.

“We’ll make this work, Louis. I’ll help take care of you and your little one and I know you’ll help me make it through whatever happens with this. We’re always there for each other, right? Just like we promised when we were in middle school.”

Louis laughed a bit and smiled through his tears that finally seem to have left. Again. Hopefully they stayed away a little longer this time.

“We’ll figure it out, yeah?” Harry asked again.

“Yeah. We always do.”

Or the one where Harry and Louis have been best friends since they could remember and their friendship has withstood it all...but an unexpected pregnancy might change everything.

All I Want Is To Be Free (11k)

“Uh, you saw photos? Of me wearing the shirt?”

The guy nodded eagerly while he pulled his phone out of his pocket. “Yeah! I took a picture of the photo I saw so I could remember to look it up. Hold on.”

The guy scrolled through his phone and made a happy sound when he found it. “Here!”

Louis grabbed his phone to look at the picture. Yep. That confirmed it. He was going crazy.

The photo he was looking at was definitely one of him wearing his beloved shirt, but there was a taller man standing beside him, looking at him and laughing as Louis had his hand resting possessively on the guy’s hip. Louis had absolutely no recollection of this ever happening.

Or the one where Louis keeps finding photos around campus of him with a man he's never met before, and the only logical explanation must be he's going crazy.

One Taste And He Want It (10k)

Stan: Yeah, dude. Listen to Steve and Oli, as much as I hate to say it.

Perrie: Well I’m supportive. If you two actually got together, it would be super cute. Perrie: Jesy says she stans you and supports your marriage

Stan: Shut up, Perrie. He doesn’t need more fuel for this. Stan: For real, Louis, I don’t think it’s a good idea.

Louis: Too late. I’m captain, which means my vote counts more than yours, and my mind’s already made up. I’m gonna woo him and learn about his team and we’re gonna kick their asses.

Or the one where Harry and Louis are the captains of the two Frisbee Battles teams in the finals, and Louis has to find a way for his team to win. Seduction is, naturally, the only option.

Better Walk That (Pap) Walk, Baby (25k) - Co-Written with @suddenclarityharry

Harry sat and stared at the print in front of his eyes where the names Louis Tomlinson and Harry Styles looked to be in neon lights. It made him think back to those early days when all they’d dreamt of was seeing their names lit up on the signs for popular venues. Back then, things had seemed so black and white. Their love had grown as their popularity had, fast and intense and overwhelming. Maybe that was part of the problem. They’d never anticipated having to weave their way through a love so all encompassing at that age, much less at the same time as navigating brand new careers they’d been lucky enough to be a part of.

Harry stared at the papers as if it wasn’t him who had just signed them. He could do this. He could. He could pretend he was still as in love with Louis Tomlinson as he had been all those years ago no problem. He was now an actor in addition to a musician for fuck’s sake, he could make this work.

Or the one where, after years filled with the anger and pain that accompany a bad breakup, Harry and Louis have to try to put it all behind them, at least for the cameras.

Love So Soft (5k)

“Harry?” Louis called out. It was light out and a Sunday. Harry was probably in the kitchen.

Right then, Harry came walking back into the room with some scrambled eggs and toast on two plates. He froze about three steps in though, and looked up at Louis, his brows furrowed.

“I made breakfast, but...you…” Harry stopped and cleared his throat. “Uhm, your scent changed? Just since I got up to make breakfast. You okay?”

Louis bit his lip and shook his head. “I think my heat is coming early.”

Or the one where Harry and Louis have been friends since they were kids, but when Louis' heat comes early, that balance that always existed between them suddenly changes.

Got This Feeling In Our Souls (8k)

Louis sat up, awoken by something he couldn’t quite put a finger on. He scrubbed at his eyes, unsure if he was actually still dreaming or if he was awake. He didn’t dream often, but when he did they were always vivid like this. Louis opened his eyes and squinted through the darkness before jumping back, his heart racing.

Dream or not, there was a person sitting in the chair in the corner of the room. The chair that usually was only used by Charlie while Louis slept.

“Who the fuck are you and how did you get in my apartment?” Louis asked, voice a bit more squeaky than he’d like to admit. Suddenly there were two flashes of green, and the world went black again.

We're Both Stubborn (Two Hearts in One Home) (13k)

The crickets that somehow were still chirping in the chilly October air suddenly sounded louder after Louis went quiet. Harry wasn’t sure what to say in response though, so he let their song remain unbroken.

“I guess I’m just scared ‘cause I don’t know what I’m doing after this,” Louis confessed with a whisper. “Some days, with the way my mom and dad are fighting, the only thing I’m sure of is you.”

Harry wrapped his arms tightly around Louis’ torso and turned into him, ignoring the night sky they were supposed to be observing.

“Doesn’t matter what else is going on, Lou. You’ll always have me. Always.”

Louis nodded and Harry could feel the movement from where he was, and that was enough.

Or the one where Harry and Louis stumble their way through life and their relationship, but at least they've got each other.

Before I Knew That I Had Begun (3k)

Louis closed his eyes and carefully rolled over so he could wrap his arms around Harry as well. Things were permissible at night that he wouldn’t allow himself otherwise, and snuggling up to Harry, breathing in his scent like this, was definitely one of those scenarios that was only allowed in the dark. Once light broke, they pulled apart again and didn’t speak of the way their bodies fit together so perfectly or the way they always ended up with awkward morning wood that needed to be taken care of separately. The blue haze that filled Louis’ dorm room and the snores from Logan in the bottom bunk afforded them a soft safety net where the impossible seemed possible and where, just for a few hours, Louis could let down his guard and not worry about why his body was so drawn to the curly haired boy sharing his bed.

A Real Work of Art (12k)

“I don’t understand,” Liam said for probably the fiftieth time in ten minutes. “You have to explain again how this is a bad thing.”

“Leeeeyummm,” Harry whined into the phone as he leaned his head onto his desk. “I felt like this year was my year for getting his attention, you know? That senior year I would finally get Logan Thompson to realize I exist! But he’s in almost every single one of my classes, Li. How am I supposed to survive that?”

“Easily,” Liam answered, with the same matter of fact tone his voice always took when Harry was in one of his fits. “He doesn’t know you exist, so it shouldn’t be a problem. Right?”

Or the one where Harry calls on an old friend, the super popular Louis Tomlinson, to help him change his look to capture the heart of Logan. Things only mostly go as planned.

You Can't Blame Me For Tryin' (5k)

Reason # 38 - Because He Is From One of the Countries You Haven't Had Sex With a Person From Yet.

Louis had been accepted into the study abroad program through his uni back home and therefore got to spend a year in rural Minnesota, of all places, but he wasn’t going to complain. It was still a pretty cool experience, even if it was far different from what he had been expecting. And besides, if he’d been sent to literally any other university, he’d never have met Harry.

Christmas at the Holly Lodge (17k)

Harry made his way to the back of the lodge and saw a building that looked like it used to be a barn, that had obviously had some renovations done. The lights were on and it looked a little like Santa’s workshop. As Harry walked closer, he saw that one of the windows was cracked open and through it came the tune of Mariah Carey’s All I Want for Christmas is You. Dancing along was the most beautiful man Harry had ever seen.

The guy was really going to town, too. It looked like he was organizing boxes of ornaments or something, but he had taken time to pause and hold up...was that a hot glue gun?...to sing into so he was belting right along with Mariah.

Harry covered his mouth with his gloved hand to hold back the giggles, and continued walking. He didn’t want to disturb the guy and embarrass him by letting him know he’d been seen. It was adorable and Harry needed to make sure he had a better first impression than that. He could already tell this visit was going to be interesting.

Or the one where Louis is the owner of the Holly Lodge, Harry is an investment advisor, and maybe Christmas miracles really do exist.

You've Got My Heart (2k)

Harry and Louis are celebrating being together for fifty years, but they can't seem to agree about who initiated the first step of the journey.

#mine #my fics #my fic rec #my fic masterpost #2017 fics masterpost #fic rec

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redhoodssweetheart · 5 years

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Fools Rush In (1/?)

Genre: Alternate Universe, Romance, Fluff, Slight Angst

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Word Count: 2.1K

Warnings: Mentions of alcohol, angst later on in the series, and talk of sexual situations, plus pregnancy mentions.

Description: Bucky oversees the buildings of clubs and bars and when he gets back from a recently completed project he learns he’s heading out to Las Vegas to build a new one and if he does a good job he’ll get the Brooklyn project, something he’s been coveting for a long time. But when he meets you things take a different turn than he expected.

A/N: I normally don’t write reader insert stories, but I had this idea and I felt like it would be better as a reader insert. It’s based off the movie Fools Rush In (1997) starring Matthew Perry and Salma Hayek. Enjoy! (Also I do not take requests. would love too, but I have too many other things that I have to do and I just don’t have time to try and keep up with requests.)

Bucky was tired, he had just gotten off a plane from Miami and all he wanted to do was go back home and sleep it off, but he had to go into the office and drop some things off. He had completely forgotten about the office Christmas party that was currently taking place.

So when the elevator doors opened and revealed all his co-workers partying and drinking all he could do would sigh. Why did this have to be tonight?

He maneuvered around people saying hello as he went. He waved to Maria Hill and saw his boss Nick Fury talking with Thor and his brother Loki. His eyes scanned the crowd for his best friend, but the tall blond was nowhere to be seen. Maybe Steve had gotten out of the party, or maybe his best friend was in the back with his wife making out like a couple of teenagers.

Bucky felt a hint of jealousy flow through him. He was happy for Steve and Peggy, they had been married for nearly two years now and they were still very much in love. But Bucky had been on a handful of dates in that time and still couldn’t seem to find that elusive one he had been looking for.

He was almost to his office when arms wrapped around him and gripped him tightly, “Hey Buck! Long time no see man.”

Bucky chuckled and turned so that he could hug his best friend, “What’s up punk?”

“Just partying,” Steve said with a grin. “There’s something we need to discuss.” He slung his arm around Bucky’s shoulders and steered him toward the office spaces in the back. “Fury wants you on the Las Vegas project.”

Bucky groaned and slumped down on the edge of his desk, “Steve, I just got back from Miami, I was hoping for a little break before I got back out there.”

Steve placed his hands on his friend’s shoulders, “Listen, if you take the Las Vega job and do well on it then you get the Brooklyn project.”

Bucky’s head snapped up and stared wide-eyed at his friend, “What?!”

Steve grinned, he knew that would get Bucky’s attention, “You heard me, you do the Las Vegas project, and you do well on it then you’ll get the Brooklyn project.”

Bucky had dreamed of the Brooklyn project since the company had come up the idea. It would be his crowning jewel in his career. He embraced his friend the two of them laughing when the door opened and revealed Fury. He arched an eyebrow, “Barnes, I need to talk to you if you all aren’t too busy in here.”

Bucky and Steve broke apart, “What do you need, sir?”

You bent over the table and began to clean up the glasses that were left behind by the previous patrons. It had been a long night and the heels you were wearing were beginning to pinch your feet. All you wanted to do was grab some junk food and head home with your roommate and best friend, Wanda, to watch sappy movies all night.

“Hey Miss Y/N!” You looked up to see Peter rushing toward you a wide grin on his face. “I got into MIT!”

A smile broke out onto your face and you enveloped the kid into your arms, “Congrats, Peter! I never doubted you for a moment”

He squeezed you tightly, “Aunt May was so thrilled, and I got the Stark scholarship! I’m getting a full ride.”

You knew this would be a huge weight off of his and his aunt’s shoulders. You may have called Tony yourself and pulled a few strings to get the kid in, but even Tony could see what a bright kid Peter was and was more than happy to help the kid out. “I knew you could do it, go tell Wanda.”

He nodded enthusiastically and went running for the kitchen where Wanda was helping clean up the dishes. You finished cleaning off the table and picked up your tray before heading into the kitchen to help with the rest of cleanup.

You and Wanda were shooed away by Vision who told the two of you that he and Peter could handle the rest of the dishes. You thanked him and headed out with Wanda, the two of you hopping into your old Jeep and taking off for the all-night grocery store a few blocks from your apartment.

“You get the snacks, I’ll get the alcohol, then we’ll meet at self-checkout,” you told her as you stepped inside the store. She nodded and darted off to get the things she needed. You made quick work of the alcohol aisle, your grabbed everything you would need for sangrias and headed for the checkout lines.

Wanda came rushing over, her arms loaded with food, “I grabbed some cool ranch Doritos and the marshmallow fluff you like so much.”

“Perfect,” you sighed as you began to scan the items while Wanda bagged. Once you were done you waved to the clerk behind the counter and headed home.

You were both watching Pearl Harbor, the sounds of Wanda’s twin brother snoring from the next room were faint over the sounds of the music score for the movie. You were both staring at Josh Hartnett and Kate Beckinsale as he snuck her into the cockpit of the plane with him before taking off. The two of you sighed. “When are we gonna find our own Danny?” Wanda rolled her head so that she was looking at you.

You snorted, “I think when we actually have a social life. We work too much, Wan. When do we have time to meet a nice guy like Danny?”

She sat up a bit straighter, “Okay, then let’s go out tomorrow night. We both have off. We can go to a bar and have some fun.”

You laughed, “I don’t think we’re gonna find our Danny among the drunken tourists looking for a good time. Remember, what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas.”

Wanda shoved you, “Just come out, if not for looking for a boy then just to have some fun. When was the last time you had fun?”

“Last night when Pietro was so drunk he decided to use your good makeup on his face and you nearly killed him. I got the whole thing on film,” you chuckled. The look of rage on Wanda’s face as she took in Pietro’s makeup covered face was hilarious. He had looked like a child that had gotten into their mother’s makeup and decided to smear it all over his face.

Wanda frowned, “That wasn’t funny and you know it.”

“Oh, it most certainly was,” you giggled. “I tried stopping him, but you know what Pietro’s like when he’s drunk.”

She shook her head, well aware of her brother’s antics when he was inebriated. “Still, will you please come out with me tomorrow?” She gave you her best puppy dog eyes and you sighed knowing that you would never hear the end of it unless you agreed.

“Fine!” You huffed. “I’ll go out with you.” She squealed and gave you a hug. Maybe you would have some fun, and hey maybe you would meet your Danny while you were at it.

Bucky and Steve landed in Las Vegas and Bucky hated how bright it was. “Why did I agree to this?” He complained as they headed toward the taxis lining the front of the airport.

“Because you want the Brooklyn project, now quit complaining. At least it’s not snowing here,” Steve opened the door to the taxi and slid inside while Bucky helped the driver load their things into the back.

Soon they were driving off and heading for the company home where Bucky would be staying. Steve had decided to stay at a hotel in the city, but Bucky didn’t want to deal with the noise the strip would cause. He also didn’t want to be tempted by the casinos or bars, he needed to have a clear head for this project.

“Just keep reminding me that this is all for the Brooklyn project and maybe I won’t complain,” he said to Steve.

“I have an idea, why don’t the two of us go out tonight? We can grab a beer, it’ll be like old times.”

“I don’t know man--”

“We’re doing it,” the finality in Steve’s voice told Bucky that he wasn’t going to take no for an answer on this one.

Steve dropped Bucky off at the home and left for his hotel promising to pick Bucky up later that evening. Bucky entered the home, it had the bare necessities inside which was fine, he wasn’t going to be here long anyway. He made his way upstairs to unpack some of his things and wash the plane off of him.

When he was out he plopped down on the bed and promptly fell asleep.

He was shaken awake sometime later by Steve. “Get dressed man, we’re going out now.”

Bucky groaned, he had been having a good dream, “Just go on without me. I was having a good dream.”

Steve pulled him up, “Nope, not gonna work, get changed and meet me downstairs in ten minutes.” He left to give Bucky some privacy.

Knowing that if he didn’t follow Steve’s orders then Steve would come back in ten minutes and drag Bucky out whether if he was dressed or not. He quickly changed and headed downstairs. They headed out to the car that Steve had rented earlier and made their way into the city.

Bucky had to admit Las Vegas was pretty at night with all the lights, but he didn’t know how people could live somewhere where there were constantly tourists coming in and out, most of them in a drunken stupor as they partied away their life savings.

Steve parked the car and they headed into a little bar that was farther away from the hustle and bustle of the main part of the strip. Bucky appreciated that Steve chose somewhere a little more lowkey for their night out.

The two of them took a seat at the bar, completely bypassing the dancefloor. The music wasn’t too loud, but it was enough for the drunker patrons to move too. Steve ordered two beers and the two of them toasted, wishing for a good build.

They talked, a few women coming over to talk to them and trying to get them onto the dancefloor. Steve politely declined, telling them he was happily married and was just out for a drink with his friend.

The women looked expectantly at Bucky, but he too declined their offers and even the drinks they sent his way. “You can have fun,” Steve said as he watched Bucky turn down the fifth woman that had come over to talk to him.

“I’m not here to have fun, I’m here to do a job. But my punk friend decided to drag me out tonight,” he said with a grin before taking another sip of his beer, he was still nursing the first one that Steve had ordered for him.

Steve merely shrugged and continued to talk about Peggy and how they were finally thinking of having kids. Bucky’s attention was pulled away from the conversation when the doors to the bar opened and he noticed two girls walking in.

One had red hair and a dress on, but the other woman was wearing jeans and a simple t-shirt. She was clearly in the same boat as him. Her bubbly friend had dragged her out when she would rather be anywhere but there at that bar at that moment. The red-haired woman said something causing the other girl to grin, but it didn’t quite reach her eyes.

Bucky continued to watch her as they headed for one of the tables on the other side of the bar. They sat down when a waitress came over to take their order. The girl who clearly looked like she would rather be anywhere else scanned the bar lazily when he eyes locked with Bucky’s. They went wide for a moment, before she quickly turned away, clearly flustered.

Steve had noticed Bucky’s attention had been pulled from the conversation and he followed his friend’s gaze. He grinned when he noticed what had caught Bucky’s attention, but didn’t comment. Bucky flagged down the bartender, “I want to buy her drink.” He was pointing at you, and you were trying not to stare at the gorgeous man you had locked eyes with seconds before.

The bartender nodded and told the waitress what Bucky had said. When she went back over and told the woman that Bucky had offered to pay for her drink her head snapped over to him, her eyes wider now. She said something and slipped off the stool she had been sitting on.

Steve patted Bucky on the shoulder, “I’m gonna go get some fresh air.” He chuckled as he exited the bar, he wondered how well that was going to go over.

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