#may it someday see daylight

[elise-51-blog]

"Run to Daylight" WIP snippet

“Why do you love sports so much?”

“‘Cos I’m a dumb jock,” Guy laughs, bunting the question away. “Plus there’s beer. And it’s easier than readin’ books and shit.”

“Shut up,” Kyle laughs, shakes his head.

It’s about dinnertime, and he wonders what he has in the fridge or if Kyle might want to get something in a bit except he’s probably not hungry after all the beer and hotdogs. 

“I dunno. I guess it’s just. When everything else in my life was shit, sports seemed like the real thing. Like the only real thing in a world of bullshit.”

Kyle hums. “It’s weird, I mean. I always thought the opposite, to be honest. Everyone cared so much about the football team, or how the basketball team was doing, and just seemed like a distraction from…from actual life. From more important things.”

Guy’s heard this spiel a million times. Mostly from chicks.

Kyle clears his throat. “I mean I--I’m not saying I’m right. It just seemed like everyone always acted like winning on Friday night was like, it’d be the end of the world if the guys lost. But I mean…I didn’t get it. It’s just--it’s literally just a game.”

“And paintin’ pictures, what’s that?” Guy almost tries not to sound too dickish.

Kyle sighs, rolls his eyes, looks away. Oh, but there’s an edge there. Something old. “I don’t think you’d understand what…what that gave me. Art. What it still gives me. It’s making something…something meaningful out of,” Kyle gestures in the air. “Out of what was meaningless.”

Guy knows if this was a movie, he’d be the asshole. Well this ain’t a fuckin’ movie.

“And the football team, just a bunch of morons tossin’ a ball back and forth?”

“That’s not what I said!”

“It’s what you meant.”

“No it’s not--”

“Listen, you say it’s only a game. And you’re right but you’re wrong too.”

There’s a long pause. They’ve never really dug into this truth between them. The gulf of difference. The dumb jock and the sensitive artist thing. Kyle tilts his head at Guy, giving him his full attention. “So tell me.”

“You can’t just put it down on a--on like a postcard. It’s…you gotta see it, right?”

“Sure. Like coming to this game? Green grass and red dirt and, and all that.” 

Guy shakes his head, it’s not what he means, he hates trying to say what he means. 

“It’s more like…it’s Michael Jordan’s jump shot.”

Kyle stares back blankly.

“David Beckham’s corner kick. Joe Montana and Jerry Rice on a Sunday. And it’s--it’s Bob Gibson 1.12 ERA and refusing to shake Joe Torre’s hand ‘cos it’s war and not a picnic. It’s Zizu’s head and Materazzi’s big mouth. It’s Curt Schilling’s bloody sock. It’s Derek Redmond limping to the finish line and Bronko Nagurski crawling to the end zone. It’s a routine ground ball rolling under Bill Buckner’s glove and Steven Gerrard slippin’ on the grass. It’s Barry Bonds’s hat size and Pete Rose’s bookie.” 

Guy doesn’t know how else to say it. It’s just all of it. It’s life but boiled down to the stuff you need. Forget tax returns and the DMV. Just good guys and bad guys. Pure love, pure hatred. Grief, agony, pain you wouldn’t believe. Outrageous joy. Selfishness, sacrifice. Blood, sweat, tears. War. Love to last a lifetime. 

“It’s everything. All of it. It’s all there. On a pitch, or a diamond, or a gridiron. Just…everything. Waitin’ on a whistle.”

“Wow.”

“Fuck off.”

“No, really!” Kyle laughs, clasping Guy’s forearm. “I mean I don’t know who any of those people are--”

“You fucking know David Beckham--”

Kyle laughs, looking away with his eyebrows raised, his dimples deep, his cheeks a little pinker. He looks so good in the ballpark lights, they should wash him out, but they can’t. “Yeah, I know David Beckham.”

#guykyle #run to daylight #may it someday see daylight #wip #maybe giving away my best stuff #guy gardner #kyle rayner #for the love of sports #david beckham #kyle knows him because he's so fucking hot c'mon now #fic wip #jocks and nerds the oldest love story #kyle and the green crayon #yeah I'm still working on it I'm just so damn slow

[strawberrystepmom]

gojo x f!reader. cw food (they’re eating ice cream and reader enjoys *glass shatters* mint chocolate chip). fluff, established relationship, feelings etc. | wc 901, divider thanks to cafekitsune!

Sitting thigh to thigh with Satoru on a park bench not far from your home, the two of you decided to take a bit of leisure time to yourselves. The sweets in your hands were a must according to him and now that you’re sitting to enjoy them, you have to admit that he was correct.

“When I was eight, I told my mom I wanted to marry ice cream someday,” you sigh after scooping a spoonful in your mouth.

The anecdote makes you feel a little embarrassed to share though you recall it easily. Sitting next to her in her car, merrily enjoying the mint chocolate chip scoop topped cone in your little hand, on a day not entirely unlike the mid-spring one you’re enjoying now. You meant every word of it, as big of a lover back then as you are now, even for the inanimate and edible.

“You treat me like I’m ice cream sometimes so maybe you were right.”

He wiggles his eyebrows salaciously, the motion visible over the tops of his sunglasses. You giggle and playfully swat at him, careful to keep your cup and spoon steady. The reference to your pension for enjoying licking every inch of him (as if he doesn’t have the same proclivities...) you possibly can warms your cheeks and you scoop a bite from your cup and into your mouth to cool yourself down, a pleased hum further grabbing his attention.

The two of you aren’t married, not quite yet, but he has told you for years that you will be. It’s you or no one as far as he’s concerned, well aware he’s going to live an easy lifetime listening to that same pleased sigh on repeat for years to come.

“Do that again?”

You scoff and roll your eyes although there is no bite to it. The ability to roll with the punches is one of the things he has always enjoyed the most about you. There is an innate playfulness to you that perfectly compliments his own even though you may pretend to be Miss Serious when the mood strikes you.

Like right now.

“Stop being gross and enjoy this beautiful day, Satoru.

He plays off your displeased warning with a laugh, tossing his arm around your shoulder and pulling you closer to him. It really is a treat to get to spend this time with him during the daylight hours considering how busy both of your schedules tend to be thanks to, well, the whole sorcery thing and the sun illuminates him enough you can almost see a halo around the top of his head.

This world is beautiful because he’s in it, you think to yourself.

Dreamily, you sigh and glance down at your thighs instead of looking at him which would only further your lovesick feeling. Your heart is so full it feels it may pop like a balloon, a sign you need to let out what you’re thinking about.

“You know, sometimes I think about anything I loved before you and that love feels so shallow.”

That is not what he was expecting you to say. Satoru’s eyes widen and he tilts his head, puffing out air loudly.

“You loved something before you met me? What a betrayal.”

The smile on your face dims and your posture tightens while you turn your face away from him. He has seen you in every vulnerable state a person can be in - naked and clothed, sick and well, broken and whole. Even if you withdraw, he will always bring you back. This time is no different.

Gojo reaches for you, turning your face toward him with his free hand.

“No no no, come back here. I was just kidding.”

His fingers rest against your jaw and his thumb runs over the round of your cheek and your sour look fades in an instant. There are many things you loved before him, people too, and though it stings to know your feelings weren’t preserved until the day he landed in your life he smiles at you softly. From the day he admitted his feelings to you years ago, you were his and his alone. There’s no use in being jealous now and whatever remains of the bitter taste dies within him when he looks at your face and leans over to glance into your cup.

“So are you saying you love me more than ice cream?”

Giggling, you tap his nose with the handle of the wooden spoon in your hand.

“I’m saying that I love you more than anything that has come before or after you at the very least.”

“Then I’ll take this as a sign you don’t want that then.” Reaching for your ice cream, he wiggles his fingers and you hold it out of his grasp with a laugh. “No,” you feign annoyance and sigh loudly. “But I’ll share it with you.”

Reaching into your cup you pull out a scoop and feed it into his open, waiting mouth. He dramatically hums his pleasure, bundling his hands against his chest and shaking slightly. It’s a ridiculous move but you can’t help but laugh at him, reaching for another scoop in to feed him again.

“I love you too, by the way.” He adds after accepting the second bite, mouth still half full and cold. Nodding with a soft smile, you know he always will.

#gojo x reader #gojo satoru x reader #kendall writes #satoken #he’s the loml………..thank u for understanding me during this difficult time

[mysicklove-main]

Parings: Yandere! Rengoku x Fem! Reader

Word Count: 14.3k (Part 1/3)

Warnings: This chpt is pretty chill so, overprotectiveness, slight possessiveness, vague meanings, rengoku personality does 180s, character injury, minor character death, gore (demon eating human and reader gets impaled)

Summary: Meeting the one you have idolized for years is a once in a lifetime experience. So, you live it up, baking him all the treats in the world. When you finally befriend him, you believe that everything is going great. But he keeps saying strange things, and is acting like he isn't leaving by the end of the week...

𝐅𝐈𝐂 𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓

Growing up, you have always idolized demon slayers. Your father was one, and he told you and your brother everything about them from a young age. Sure, it may have scared the daylights out of you, but at least you were forever prepared for the real world. 

He had planned to teach both of you the ways of a slayer, but he passed early into your childhood. With your mom passing at birth, it was only you and your older brother. The two of you made do with the loss.

Instead of following in your father’s footsteps, the two of you lived a simple life. The both of you live in a small cottage, just on the outskirts of a village. You woke up early every morning to sell fresh baked goods to the villagers, while your brother traveled west, aiding the sickly, and making money through donations. He always came back after one week of being gone.

When the two of you are together, you always are reminiscing over the stories your father once told. Most of the time referring back to how he met the Hashiras.

By god, you idolized them. You have always dreamed of meeting them like your father did. He described them as the most skilled people on the planet. The protectors of the human world. His words couldn’t help but draw you in. You wanted to know everything about them. How they trained, how they spoke, how they lived. 

You daydream all the time about meeting any of them. 

Specifically, the son of the man who once saved your father from death. Who granted him an extra three years with you. You have fond memories of how your father used to mention how strong the boy was from such a young age. The boy who was built to protect.

You dreamed of meeting him. You were a plain girl who lived a normal life, so you couldn’t even fathom the thought of being your age and fighting off demons. The thought of him drew you in and you vowed to someday find him.

You knew what he looked like. Your father went into detail about the child. The boy who looks like the flame. Fiery hair and eyes.

You shiver in glee like you always do when you think of your idol. He has to be your age by now, maybe a little older. You wonder what he is like, of course, he has to be unbelievably strong, but was he arrogant because of it? Or was he kind? You didn't care, you just want to see him. Talk to him. Just one time. That's all you needed.

“Hey, Y/N!” Your brother calls as you begin your journey toward the village. You turn, to see him in front of the house, his travel backpack on, and waving at you.

You frown. “You're not leaving right?” You respond, and the waving arm hesitates. He had just got home yesterday, he usually stays for a week before leaving.

“I have to! I just got word that someone needs my help.”

You sigh but nod. He always was so kind. “You'll come back? In a week?”

He grins at you, that bright smile he inherited from your father. You wish yours was as bright as his. That's part of the reason he was loved by all. “Always. I'll be back in a week’s time. Be good without me!”

You throw up a hand, waving him goodbye. “I will! Be safe!” You call and he smiles in return, before turning his back on you and beginning his journey.

You sigh when he disappears, sensing something amiss, but brush it off. Your worries always got the best of you, and you needed to focus. 

Alas, you begin to walk forward and toward the village.

You are greeted by your regulars, and many of the elderly come up to you to complain about how big you are getting. You always have to remind them that you are not a child anymore, but nevertheless, they never seem to get it. 

The villagers have always been kind to you, and you were forever grateful. With the lack of parents, it was nice to have someone to turn to for affection.

Currently, you were walking around and greeting the villagers, with your hands completely full of fresh goods. A handful of people approached you and paid their dues, with a warm smile. The business was going well, and you were having a nice time chatting with the villagers. 

You see a dark hooded figure in the distance, walking quickly toward you. Politely, you make your way to the other side of the road to avoid the stranger. You slightly nod to yourself and continue forward.

Suddenly, at a couple steps away they switch back into your lane and run completely into you. Their shoulder knocks into yours and you wince. Black gloved hands move quickly and you can see them snatch the money in your pocket. You can’t seem to do anything, because the force of his shoulder has sent you falling backward.

You land on your backside with a groan and watch all of your baked goods tumble across the pavement. Immediately you look up toward the stranger, but he was gone. So, you turn back toward the ground and try to scoop up any of the pastries you can. 

They are all ruined. You try not to let it get to you, but it hits you hard. You sit on your knees on the hard pavement and clench your fists, trying not to cry. All that time you spent baking and selling was for nothing. Just for some thief to steal your hard work from you. 

A shadow stands in front of you, but you ignore it, too focused on yourself to deal with another kind villager. You don’t want to lash out at them. 

A booming male voice says, “Are you alright?” 

You jump at the sheer power of the stranger’s call but continue to keep your head down. Tears were now pooling in your eyes and you quickly wipe them away. “I'm okay. It's fine, you can go now,” You mumble, but the shadow doesn't move.

“How could I leave a maiden in need?” He continues, still abnormally loud. You shake your head and sigh, before grabbing the remaining pastries and putting them back in their holder. When you begin to stand up, you feel a strong arm, grab onto yours and help ease your way up.

You finally look up to take in the man’s appearance and your eyes widen. Eyes and hair of a flame. A fire kimono. A sword connected to his side. 

This was him. The man you have wanted to meet your entire life. It had to be.

Your mouth hangs open as your mind blanks. He frowns slightly. “Are you alright, ma’am?”

“Its…It’s you,” You say breathlessly, not caring at the moment how strange you may sound.

He frowns even more at your vague statement. “Oh! Do you know me?” His voice causes some heads to turn, but he seems to ignore it, almost used to the stares.

You blink at him. You are at a loss for words. He was here. You didn’t actually think this would happen. It was supposed to be just a dream.   

A couple of seconds go by. 

He instead changes the subject at your silence. “Well! I see that you dropped these.” He points to the now dirty danishes. “How upsetting! I wanted to buy some. Will you make more?”

This seems to snap you back into reality and you begin to ramble nervously. “Oh…Yeah. A thief knocked me over and took my money. Just my luck, huh? But i'll be back tomorrow with fresh ones.” You're blushing. You didn’t say or do anything embarrassing, but the fact that you are finally in his presence is making you squirm.

He smiles and you tear your eyes away from him, a wobbly smile pulling at your face. “Great! I'll buy the whole bunch in advance!” He hands you a huge stack of money and you gape at him. He just handed you two days worth of cash.

“Sir, this is way too much!” You splutter, beginning to hand him back the money. He just laughs in return. His huge body tilts back with the booming noise. 

“Nonsense! It's to compensate for what the thief did to you.” 

“Are you sure sir? You don't have to do that.”

“I want to. As long as you promise to make more of those danishes!”

His kindness makes you beam and the words slip out of you before you could stop them. “You are so generous, sir. As expected of such a high-rank demon slayer!” 

You knew you sounded like a total fangirl, clutching your fists with sparkles in your eyes, but you didn’t care. The fact that you weren’t freaking out right now was impressive. 

He cocks his head to the side, the soft smile never falling. “You know who I am?”

“Of course, I know who you are! The flame harisha. One of the strongest demon slayers out there. I am a huge fan, sir!” You grin up at him, setting the ruined danishes aside, and he lets out another powerful laugh.

He didn't seem as shocked that you knew about demons as you thought he was going to be. Or maybe he was just hiding it pretty well. “I didn't know I had fans!”

You hum with a frantic nod. “If everyone knew what you did for us, you would have millions of fans!”

He places a hand on your shoulder and you buzz with happiness. “You are too kind, ma’am. But please don't give me so much praise! I am only doing my job.” 

You shake your head, “You’re being way too humble! You have no idea how great you are.” You pause, coming back to reality. You don't want to annoy the slayer with your useless rambling, he was a busy man.

You sigh and instead, bow. “Thank you for everything. I won’t take up your time.” Your voice is quieter and more controlled but still expresses your immense gratitude.

You grab your stuff and head home with a gleeful look in your eyes before he could even say anything. 

A second goes by and you begin to daydream about the types of danishes you are going to make for him. Suddenly, you feel a presence, so you turn to your side to see him walking beside you, a small content smile on his face. You almost jump, his movements were so silent, how did he catch up with you so fast? 

When he notices you take in his appearance he turns to you and grins. “You’ll be back tomorrow, right? I must dine on some of your baked goods!”

You match his intensity with a wide smile. “Of course. I wouldn’t lie to you, sir!”

“Please, call me Rengoku.”

“Of course, Mr. Rengoku!” You are buzzing again. Two conversations you have had with him and now you know his name. You couldn’t wait to tell your brother all about this.

“Great! I’ll see you tomorrow…” He pauses, turning toward you, hinting for you to continue.

“Y/N.”

“Tomorrow then, Miss Y/N. Stay safe!” And just like he appeared, he disappeared in a matter of seconds, while you are stuck red in the face from your idol saying your very own name. 

You could die happy.

You woke up extra early the next morning. The goods had to be absolutely perfect. You were determined for him to like them. You even used some frosting to draw little orange flames on them. You hoped he didn’t think they were lame. It’s definitely a very good possibility he did.

When the sun rose, you grabbed your iteams and quickly headed down the hill. The quicker you got there, the better. You didn’t want them to get cold.

The town was extra busy that day. More people greeted you on the streets and you had to apologize to many that you weren’t selling today. After all, he bought every single one.

Your head hung high and you were practically skipping around the town, beaming at anyone and everyone. 

You don’t seem to notice the small curb in front of you. You run into it, and screech when you begin to fall forward, not knowing what to do. You could drop your danishes and save yourself from pain, or you could move the basket up and brace yourself for a harsh fall straight to the face.

You weren’t about to let Rengoku’s desserts get ruined. 

Just as you were about to hit the floor you stop. You feel a hand on your shoulder, as you stare face to face with the ground. You clutch the pastries. “Miss Y/N, its a pleasure seeing you here!” The familiar voice calls and you turn red out of sheer embarrassment at the situation you are in.

He pulls you back with just one hand and you have to physically restrain yourself from fangirling. He held your entire weight with one hand like it was no big deal. 

You quickly turn around, trying to ignore the fuming of your face, and hold out the pastries to him. “Here! I hope you like them!” You exclaim while pulling the lid off to show him the decorated buns. You take in a deep breath and wait.

His eyes seem to sparkle when he takes in the frosting and you take this as a good sign. He smiles wide and grabs one of the goods. Without a second thought, he plops the entire thing into his mouth. 

He chews in silence, and you could almost hear your heartbeat pound as you wait for his thoughts.

With a swallow, his eyes fall back to you, and he says, “Tasty!” 

You beam instantly, matching his wide smile. “You think so?”

“I know so. These are one of the most delicious baked goods I have ever had!” The gleeful buzzing is back, you knew that your baking was good, but to hear it from his mouth was such a gift. 

He puts both hands on both of your shoulders and you freeze at the touch, internally freaking out. “Come with me, Miss Y/N. Let us eat them together!” He exclaims, before snatching the goods from your hands with one hand and pulling you behind him with the other. You don’t have room for protest.

He leads you to the edge of the town and plops himself on a curb behind a small restaurant, and faces the hill you live on. You sit next to him, and he doesn’t seem to care about personal space, because almost instantly he is crowding yours. 

You’re going to have to get used to this, you can’t freak out anymore than this.

He opens the box again and hands you one of the goods, but you pull away. “Those are for you, Mr. Rengoku. I can’t take something you bought!”

But, to your dismay, he grabs your hands, places a baked good into them, and shuts his fingers over yours. “Eat!”

You weren’t going to ignore his demand, so you pick up the bun and begin to nibble on it. He stares, waiting for a reaction. You smile hesitantly, “It’s good!”

“Right!” He exclaims before placing another danish into his mouth, with another loud, “Tasty!”

You begin to laugh at his antics. The way he yells, the way he dragged you away like it was nothing, and simply how enthusiastic he seemed to be. He was a strange man, but you couldnt help but like him even more.

He looks at you as he chews, while you throw your head back in a laugh. “Is there something funny?” He asks, glancing around the area. It was just the two of you.

“You are just so…so human!”

He mimics your smile, even if he is totally lost at your vague statement. “Well, I'd hope so!” He says before taking another huge bite.

Your smile softens as you stare at the food in your hands. “It’s just, I thought you would be different, you know? A Hashira, shouldn't you be super serious or arrogant?”

He swallows his bite and looks out toward the hill. His voice comes out softer, “You idolize me too much Miss Y/N. I am nothing but a man who must protect the weaker people of this world.”

“But do you want to? You aren’t forcing yourself to do this because of your father, right?” He turns to you with slightly wider eyes and blinks. The two of you remain in silence for a couple of seconds.

But then he grins, with the tilt of his head. He places a massive hand on the top of your head and you freeze. “Not to worry, Miss Y/N. I love what I do. I wouldn't change it for the world,” He says, slightly ruffling up your hair. 

Another couple of seconds go by as you think of what to say. But he speaks up before you do. “You knew my father?” The man prompts, turning his attention directly on you. It makes you nervous, his watchful eyes seem to take in your every move.

You press on either way, tearing your eyes away so you can focus. “No, but he saved my father about ten years ago. So, I am forever indebted to the Rengoku family. I cannot thank you enough, Mr. Rengoku. Even if it wasn’t you who saved my father, you and your family have protected so many people. Saved so many. It's incredible, really, you're incredible,” You hum and he continues to stare.

You continue, you have been waiting to tell someone this, specifically him, so you couldn’t stop the rambling. “All of the Hashira are. For years I’ve daydreamed about meeting them. You specifically.” You glance up at him and quickly look back down in embarrassment when you see his small smile. “I've always idolized you all. It’s strange to think, we are the same species, but you are someone who risks their lives daily to kill demons, why I sell pastries to keep food on the table. It’s kinda embarrassing when you think about it…” You trail off, taking another bite of the good to keep yourself distracted.

Seconds go by and you begin to get uncomfortable. You turn toward him to meet his watchful stare. His fiery eyes seem to look through you. “I’m sorry, did I make you uncomfortable? I said way too much, please just enjoy the bun, I'll be quiet, I promise!”

He sets the danish down and your eyes follow it with a slight frown. He forcefully grabs your hands and you quickly look up shocked at the sudden touch. “Thank you for the kind words!” He yells and you cringe slightly at the volume. “But like I said yesterday, we are just fulfilling our duty. You are not indebted to anything. And Miss Y/N please don’t think that way! You don’t have to kill demons to be great, you know. Being this good of a baker is way more important than someone like me!”

The way he says it throws you off. It all sounds so genuine like he truly believes that what you are doing is important. He definitely knows how to make someone feel special. “T-Thank you, Mr. Rengoku!”

He smiles wide. “Please, call me Kyojuro! I think we are going to be friends, Y/N!”

You are taken aback. You didn’t think you would ever be friends with someone like him. It makes you grin. “You really think so?”

“Yes! Besides how else am I going personalized fresh goods from a pretty lady?” He says, gently letting go of your hands so he can point to the wobbly icing drawing of a flame located on the center of the bun. 

Your face fumes, both from embarrassment at his compliment and the ridiculous decoration. You wave your hands in front of your face. “It’s nothing! You deserve much more sir—Kyojuro.”

“Nonsense! How could anyone deserve something so magnificent!” He declares, loud and full of pride. 

It made another small laugh slip through your lips. It was endearing to see how passionate he was about the smallest things. He was unreasonably kind to you. 

He grins with a small hum, when he sees you smile, before shoving another bun into his mouth. 

“Tasty!” 

And just like that, you made friends with a Hashira.

The two of you were quick to get closer to one another. I mean it was simple really, you interviewed him on his entire life story, while he happily explained. You bring him goods every day, and no matter how much you reassure him it’s fine, he always insists on paying you the full amount.

But nevertheless, you have been avoiding the question that hangs in the air. Why are you here?

You don't want to know. There has to be a demon near or else he would never come to this small town. You fear that when you ask that question it’s going to spur his leave. It’s been four days now. He has to be on his way soon.

You've grown attached even in this short period of time. He has to have that effect on others; you wouldnt believe him if he said otherwise. He was the type of person who people couldn’t help but be drawn to. It made you feel possessively good that he was spending time with you rather than the other villagers.

A shoulder bumps into you while you are lost in your daydream. You flinch back and into Kyojuro. He glances down at you and then snaps his gaze back to the man that knocked into you. In less than a heartbeat, the Hashira steps in front of you and grabs onto the jacket of the stranger. You could barely even process what was happening.

“Sir, I’d ask for you to apologize. You’ve disrespected a lady,” His voice is tight, but the Hashira smiles at the man. It makes you gulp.

You realized quickly that Kyojuro is…overprotective. It made sense though, his whole job is to protect people, but these were humans he was protecting you from. And most of the time they weren’t even doing anything amiss. Simple things like, a salesman having a snarky tone at you, a man trying to flirt with you for your service, a small child almost tripping you, or now, someone who accidentally bumped into you.

He never gets truly upset, the smile is still plastered on his face, but the tone is always sharp, dangerous even. His voice was powerful naturally, so to hear it shift was intimidating. 

You grab onto his arm before the man could speak. “It’s fine, Kyojuro. It was my fault, I wasn’t paying attention.” You turn to the man and quickly bow in apologies. 

His gaze sharpens, and you see his eyebrows begin to furrow at your actions. He didn’t seem to like this.

The man remains in his grasp. “Hey, you can let him go now,” You say, moving your hands to his fingers to try to coax them open.

His eyes remain locked on the man who was now struggling in his hold. “Apologize, sir.”

“Kyojuro, I said-”

He cuts you off, his loud voice cutting your train of thought short. “He touched you, so he must make up for it.” He smiles at you, but this time it doesn’t feel the same as it usually does. The malice in his voice is unhidden.

“I’m sorry! Can you just let me go you crazy bastard!” The man complains, grabbing at the Hashira’s wrist to pull himself away. 

In an instant, Rengoku drops him, and the man scampers away, mumbling curses underneath his breath.

You sigh, your gaze following the man that beginning to disappear into the crowd. When you turn back around, Rengoku is staring at you, the familiar small smile on his face. “Was that really necessary?” You whine.

He huffs a small laugh, before placing a hand on your head. Something he seems to do as a sign of affection. “Of course it was! I can't let you be treated that way!”

His usual smile is back and you find comfort in it. In these moments he was always different, but he always snapped back to usual not long after. So, you tend not to dwell on them.

“Whatever you say, Kyojuro,” You hum, before changing the subject. “C’mon, let's head back to my place, I wanna teach you something!”

He pauses, eyes slightly widening. He has never been to your place before. The two of you tended to stay in the village, spending daylight hours with one other. You have never asked him over, and at this time. It was almost evening.

It made him concerned. Do you invite other men over to your place? He knew you idolized him, but if you had met Tengen or Giyuu first, would you have invited them over as well? It made him feel strange to think about it. You were too accepting, you should be more cautious of inviting people over. The two of you only met a couple of days ago.

“You don’t have to go if you don't want to…” You say, your voice unsure at his original silence.

He snaps back to reality, and blinks at you a couple of times, before grinning wide. “I would love to go!” He bellows, causing heads to turn. 

You’re used to it by this point, so you grab his hand and lead him up the mountain.

He looks massive in your small cottage. It wasn't just his height. It was his overall frame that made him look so out of place. It wasnt built for a Hashira to live in.

You decided not to comment on it, you didn’t want to hurt his feelings. Besides, a demon slayer needs a frame like that. It was rather intimidating.

You lead him into the kitchen, pulling him away from the shrine dedicated to your parents. He didn’t comment on it, instead bowing low and letting himself be dragged. 

You begin to pull out your baking materials, while he stands and watches, occasionally asking if you need any help, to which you deny with a hum.

Finally, once settled you dramatically slam your first on the table, and look up at him with a smile. His eyes follow your fist in a confused, but delighted stare. “I am going to teach you how to bake!” You exclaim, hands thrusting into the air with excitement.

His eyes light up. “Tasty!”

You in turn roll your eyes, the smile still plastered on your face. “That's the goal. I hope that you can make your own goods when…you know.”

His eyes soften, and his voice drops. “I leave?”

“Yeah.”

He walks over to you, and he uses his hand to lightly trace the area near your temple, bending down slightly to meet your gaze. “Don't worry about that for now. We've got time.”

Your mind travels back to that question.

Why are you here? 

You ignore the recurring thought. It never seems to leave you alone. It wasn’t worth thinking about it. You were here with your idol, and that should be enough for you. Just meeting him should have been enough. You found yourself getting greedy.

You nod into the touch, blushing slightly, when he pulls away with a hum. You never got used to how physically affectionate he was.

He seemed to think nothing of it, constantly brushing his hand against your body. You’ve thought it was an accident at first, when his hands lingered on your hips for a second too long, or when his hands seem to twitch when they graze yours. But when he led you through a crowd with a hand on your back, it made you realize how touchy he must be.

You didn’t mind of course. If he was showing any affection toward you, it had to be a blessing. Demon slayers would kill to talk to a Hashira, nevertheless, be friends with one. 

“So where do we begin?” Rengoku prompts, rubbing his hands together as to prepare them for heavy work. 

You laugh, cutting your thoughts off, and begin the lesson.

It turns out he is horrible at baking. For all of the talents he was gifted with, the kitchen was not one of them. 

He tried, truly he did, his face is covered with flour, and whenever you asked if he needed help, he pretended that he was doing completely fine. It was cute, really.

But, after twenty minutes of struggling to follow your commands, you saw him begin to get frustrated. His brows were pinched as he tried to knead the dough, way too hard than usual. His fingers dug into it, and you heard his noises of annoyance under his breath. 

You walk over to him and stand next to him, before reaching over to put your hands on his. “Gently, Kyojuro. Like this.” You murmur, before guiding the both of your hands to knead the dough, gently this time. 

His hands are much larger than yours, and you struggled to move them, but he went completely lax under your hands. He lets you lead them into the repetitive motion, while you mumble instructions. 

His silence becomes deafening. Rengoku isnt one to stop talking, especially in situations like these. 

You glance up at him, to see that he is staring at you. His eyes are opened wide, his mouth curled up in a small content smile. “What?” You muse, automatically removing your hands from his. His smile drops when they leave.

“That's the first time you touched me.”

“What? No, it’s not, I feel like the two of us are always somehow touching one way or another.”

He barks a laugh, shaking his head. “Yeah, but I always initiated them. You touched me, Y/N!”

You turn red. “Am I not allowed to?” You say, trying not to let the embarrassment get to you.

“Of course not! Please, feel free to touch me at any time and anywhere!”

“Don’t say it like that!”

“What? I am merely speaking the truth. I enjoy it immensely when you touch me, Y/N!” Your hand covers his mouth before he could get anything else out. He blinks at you, before closing his eyes with a wide smile. Probably grateful you were touching him again.

What he was saying was true. You tried to keep a little bit of space between the two of you. Even if he enjoys physical contact, you didn’t want to catch him on a bad time and have him snap on you. Honestly, you don't want to do something that may make him upset, because the idea you have of him in your mind would be tarnished. You like how you see him now.

“Are you done now?” He nods frantically under your hand. You pull away and he beams at you. It was rare to see him not smiling honestly. 

He turns back to the dough, a determined look on his face. “Alright, I believe I can do this! Gently this time!” 

You nod and stand close to him as he begins to try to knead the dough. 

Too soft. Way too softly. It looked like he was afraid to touch it. You sigh. “Kyojuro, I don't think this is going to work.”

His body snaps over to you, his eyes wide and looking a little panicked. “What’s not going to work?” He splutters. 

It was the first time he didn’t look like a Hashira in your eyes. He looked like a regular man, who also have their fears and worries. But you have no idea what he seems to be worried about. 

You place a hand on his lower arm and tilt your head to the side in a soft grin. His eyes flicker to it, and his body seems to jolt at the touch. He focuses his stare on you. “You baking. I think you should stick to demon-slaying, hmm?”

“But how am I supposed to eat these delicious goods?”

You pause, using your other finger to tap your chin. “You could visit me from time to time and I can make them for you.”

He stares at you, a small frown on his face. He seems to do this a lot, you’ve taken notice too. The staring. It’s like he goes into a whole different world when he looks at you. Sometimes he would speak on what he was thinking about, others he would change the subject.

It seemed that he felt like talking today. Even if the results shocked you so. “Or you could live with me!” He exclaims so loud you swear you saw your porcelain cups shiver.

You blink at him. He smiles in return, and grabs both of your hands, cupping them in his own. “What?”

“I said, you could live with me!”

You shake your head, eyes flickering to your hands in his hold. “No, I know what you said, but what are you talking about? I can’t just pick up and move in with a guy I just met, simply because you like my danishes.”

His smile falters. “It will be more than just you baking for me, I promise Y/N. Besides, we met four days ago and we seem to get along perfectly!  Do you not trust me?”

“Of course I trust you, you are a Hashira after all. The world has to trust you.”  He doesn't seem to like this answer. His smile drops completely now, and his eyebrows slightly furrow. You gulp, not wanting him to be upset at you. “I mean–It's just that I can’t leave my brother alone! I have to stay here and watch the house when he is gone!”

He drops your hands, the smile returning. “Of course! The brother. You are so kind, Y/N, really.” His hand lands back on your head, ruffling the lose strands. His voice seems to be just barely strained, and the grip on your head is a tad bit harsher than usual. Not enough to hurt, but enough to notice the difference.

It’s not that you don’t want to go with him. It would be a dream come true to live with a Hashira. But you weren’t dumb. You knew that underneath the kimono and the blade by his side, he is still a man. A strong one at that. 

The thought made the image of him in your head start to blur once more. You are getting too close to him, and although it was nice to be his friend, when he leaves you don’t want to think of him any differently.

You focus on the task at hand. You fix your hair quickly, while he laughs gently. You beam back at him. “Well, lets finish teaching you how to bake!”

“Right!”

Tomorrow your task was to pick up necessities from the village next door. Stuff like flour, cloth, string, baking supplies, and maybe, if you made enough this week, a new pair of shoes. You go on these trips once every three weeks. They took about the whole day, as it was about a five-ish mile walk and you needed to visit many different shops.

So, you couldn’t see Rengoku tomorrow. The thought made you a little sad, but the two of you had seen each other for five days in a row. You didn’t want him to get sick of you anyways.

The two of you sat on the bank of the nearest river. Him filling up the containers for you, even when you tried to stop him, reassuring you that you could do it by yourself. He didn’t listen of course.

It’s silent between the two of you, instead listening to the sounds of the river passing by. His leg is touching yours. You don’t know if it’s purposeful or not. “I’m leaving tomorrow,” You hum, trying to start up a conversation.

Silence. Your eyes flicker to him. He stares at the ground, eyes wide, and darting back and forth along the grass, as if trying to process something. His hand grips his kimono. “Where?” He breathes, after a couple more seconds of thick tension.

You try to laugh it off, confused by the mood shift, and his eyes snap toward you. Recently, he has gotten more…serious. It made you even more afraid that he was beginning to not like you. “Where?” He questions again, his voice louder this time.

“To the next village over. Need some supplies. It will only take a day,” You reason, and you swear you could see his body begin to relax. 

And suddenly, as if nothing happened, he turns to you with a grin on his face. “Of course! We shall go together!” 

You blink at him, the thoughts of him getting sick of you resurfacing. Besides, he had a mission to do, you know he did, whether he told you or not. “I appreciate that, Kyojuro, but I kinda wanna do this alone.”

His grin falls in a heartbeat, and his eyes become wide again. Similar to how he looked yesterday. Panicked. “Are you sick of me?”

“What? No! Of course not. How could I ever get sick of you?”

He huffs, turning toward you. “Then we go together!”  

“But,” You continue, causing his smile to drop. “I think it’s a good idea for us to spend some time apart. We’ve only just recently met, and we have spent every day together.”

“That’s true! But we are enjoying it, are we not?”

“Well yeah, but we may not…soon.”

“Why?” He begins to move closer to you. You can almost feel his breath on your skin. The proximity makes you shiver.

“Because…Because I don’t know! That’s just how it works.”

“I will not enjoy spending time with you, Y/N. I hope the same for you.” He says that now, but you don’t believe him truly. It’s human nature for one to need alone time. It was strange that someone like him who works alone most of the time doesn’t understand it.

Your head is scrambling for something else to say, and without meaning to you tell him what you have been wanting to know for so long. “Kyojuro, what are you even doing here?”

He falters at this and your own eyes widen. You didn’t mean for it to come out like that. “I’m sorry–I meant, It’s just…are you on a mission out here?”

He smiles at you, his gaze soft, like you say anything, and still, he wouldn’t be mad at you. “Yes. There is a group of demons near the woods. I’m here to end them!” 

His story sounds plausible, but you weren’t stupid, he was a Hashira. This mission should have ended after at most two days. And not only that, you haven’t heard of any people going missing. Was he saving them and taking his time to kill the demons? 

Rengoku wouldn’t do that. The flame Hashira would never leave demons walking on this world willingly. He must be planning a strategy to kill them. He must be. 

But you’ve heard stories of how his father took down hundreds with little to no trouble. Was Rengoku weaker than you thought?

You couldn’t stand the thought of the glorified picture in your head being damaged.

So, you nod. “Well, you should probably stay here to protect the villagers in case something goes amiss?”

“Don’t you worry, my Y/N! Demons don’t come out in the day! The villagers will be completely fine with my absence. Please let me come along! I will not be a nuisance!”

He seems adamant about him coming, and you didn’t want to be a bother. So, with one last sigh, you nod and give in. Besides, you wouldn’t ever be sick of him, and you couldn’t help but cling to the idea that maybe he wouldn’t be either.

The Hashira accompanied you on your journey the next day, grinning the entire time while carrying your bags.

Two days have passed by. You’ve been with him for six days in a row now, and honestly, you’ve never been better. You were wrong about the idea of getting sick of him. Nothing about him steered you away.

In fact, you believe that you have started to have a crush on the Hashira. 

Not that you would ever admit it. It was a ridiculous idea, but you couldn’t help but fall for him. It wasn’t even him being a Hashira that drew you in now, it was his personality. Sure, he would always make you feel safe and protected from harm, but it was the way he smiled at you that made your heart flutter. The way he was always so polite, and treated you with the utmost respect.

You haven’t experienced many people like him, so like a moth to the flame, you began to fantasize about what it would be like to be with him. 

But, it was naive of you. He was bound to leave soon. A group of demons has ought to be killed soon. If not, his master would surely call upon him soon.

You were growing too attached to him. It was weird to think about how you would have to start doing everything alone again. How silent everything is going to be again. 

If you went with him, what would life be like for you?

You throw the thought out. You couldn’t leave your brother alone, he’s all you had left. The two of you needed each other to survive.

“I feel jealous of whoever you are thinking about, Y/N,” Rengoku calls from behind his shoulder, as he helps you put away some dishes. He turns to you with a smile on his face.

You laugh lightly, beginning to get used to his teasing. “Aw, too bad you’ll never know.” 

He sets the dish down and begins walking over to you, with a small smirk and raised eyebrow. You don’t move. He approaches you, much too closely as usual, and you try to refrain from blushing. “What?”

“And if I make you tell me?” He questions, eyes staring deeply into yours.

“Hmmm, how?”

His smile widens at your tone. “I have some ideas!”

You laugh at this and jab a finger into his chest. “You, my Hashira, wouldn’t hurt a fly.”

He blinks at you. “You know just what to say to make a man blush!” He exclaims, the familiar loudness returning. It was true, his face seemed to have a twinge of pink.

It took you a second to understand. You didn’t mean it like that. The “my Hashira” was only supposed to tease him in turn. It made you fume from embarrassment. You begin to scramble to explain yourself, but he places his large hand on your head again.

His voice goes softer. “But my flame, that isn’t true. Please don’t doubt me. I wouldn’t hesitate to end someone if anyone hurts you. It’s my job to protect you.”

The seriousness in his voice makes you uneasy. “A demon right? Not a human?” You question, sounding way more nervous than you should be. The way he said it made you really think about how strong he truly is. Without a second thought, he could kill you or anyone if he wanted to. 

This thought confused you. Rengoku would never hurt you, nor any human, why does the thought seem to leave a chill down your spine? How are you having these thoughts, when not even a minute ago you were thinking about potentially leaving with him?

He stares at you, the smile not leaving his face. “Exactly,” He says, and then removes his hand from your head, to turn back to the dishes. He was always booming with confidence, why did he sound so doubtful?

Why are you questioning a Hashira’s morals?

You have to get your mind off the subject. It was making things complicated and you were allowing paranoia to get the best of you.

You creep up next to him, grabbing the clay cup from his hands, and away. “Kyojuro, do you remember the time I showed you how to bake?”  

He turns to you with a wide smile, eyes lighting up. “Of course! They were delicious!” Well, yours were. His didn’t turn out as well. You gave up on teaching him how to bake correctly, and he didn’t seem to mind at all.

“Well, you must pay a price for my knowledge,” You hum, turning your back towards him to hide your smile.

“Not to worry, I will pay for all the ingredients!”

You roll your eyes at the offering. “A different price. I did you a service, now you have to do me one.”

Footsteps approach you rapidly, and suddenly his chest is against your back. You jump at the feeling and crane your head to look up at him. 

Two bright eyes stare down at you, blinking owlishly. His hands fall to your shoulder, and his smile is different this time. It seems more like a smirk, rather than a grin. But still, you could tell that the man was practically gleaming. “What type of service, Y/N?”

His low voice startles you, and you flush at the noise. As on instinct you jump away from his hold and turn toward him. “Not that type of service!” You scramble out, trying and failing to keep your cool.

He laughs at this, and you clench your fists in embarrassment. “I apologize, I was teasing you, Y/N!” When you don’t respond, he continues, tone lighter than before. “I am at your beck and call, what do you need from me?”

“I would like for you to teach me some basic self-defense mechanisms.”

His eyes sharpen in an instant, the laugh in his voice gone. “Why? I will protect you.”

You frown at him, not expecting this reaction. “When you leave, Kyo.”

“You don’t need to protect yourself, I said this earlier. I will not let anything touch you. It’s my duty.”

“When you leave,” You repeat when he doesn’t get the memo. He’s acting like he could protect you even when is gone for his next mission.

His eyebrows furrow and his voice comes out flat. “Do you want me to leave?”

It feels like an accusation.

“What? No, but its inevitable.”

He grabs onto your hands and holds them tightly. It feels more than a regular friendship hold, it seemed desperate, but you were too engrossed in the situation to even think about that. “It doesn’t have to be that way.”

You try to pull away, but he holds them in place. Your voice goes softer, almost as if you were soothing a small child. “I can’t go with you, Kyojuro and you know that. My brother needs me.”

His smile drops in an instant and his face turns cold. “Fine. I’ll teach you. Let’s go outside.” The swordsman says cooly, dropping your hands and beginning to walk toward the door of your house. 

Regret fills your veins. You have never seen him upset at you, and you have no understanding of what you did was wrong. He should know that the two of you living together was strange. Unless he was asking for marriage? But that doesn’t seem right, he hasn’t made any romantic moves on you and he would need your brother’s blessing to even be considered.

Or was it asking him to train you that made him upset? But that also didn’t make any sense. Wouldnt he want you to be more protected? Learning basic self-defense is something that everyone should know, and could possibly save your life. 

He was so confusing. In one second he’s smiling at you with stars in his eyes, and in the next, he seems to be a completely different person. 

Who was he, really?

You scramble toward the door.

He stands in front of you, back facing you. His figure stands tall, and his hair gently falls on the top of his shoulder. Even from far away, he oozes with power.

You tip-toe your way over to him, gulping when his eyes flash to you the second your feet land on the pathway. You smile awkwardly at him, and he in return nods his head with a huff. He turns around to face you. The two of you stand in front of one another in silence. 

You begin to apologize, the strange mood was not something you intended, but he cuts you off. “To begin, take out the knife in your pocket.”

You flinch, staring at him in shock. You never told him about the knife you store in case of emergencies. It’s hidden beneath enough fabric that nobody could feel it on you even if they patted you down.

He watches you begin to scramble for an explanation and laughs. The powerful noise throws his head back, with the return of the smile. Another strange shift in his personality. But you don’t mind it at the moment. The cold shoulder he gave you worried you. The laugh makes you feel more at ease immediately, almost forgetting completely about the knife. 

“I saw a glimpse of it when you reached for the top shelf!”

A simple explanation. Obviously, it had to be, you were being dramatic, Rengoku would never do anything weird. So, you just nod at him and reach into the cloth to pull out the steel blade. 

It was nothing fancy, but your father gifted it to you when you were younger, so you treasured it deeply.

“Great job, Y/N! Now attack me,” He beams, stepping a couple of feet away to give you running room.

You blink at him, trying to ignore the borderline embarrassing encouragement. He said it like you actually did something great. “What?”

“You heard me! Attack me! Pretend I am the thief from a couple of days back!” You do what he says without much hesitation. You asked to be trained, and he knows exactly how to do it. Besides, he was a trained swordsman it’s not like you were going to actually land a blow on him.

You charge at him and swing the knife up toward his shoulder. As expected, he dodged immediately. He now stands behind you. “Again!”

You shift your feet toward him, clenching your teeth as you take another strike, this time aiming for his neck. Like before, he seems to disappear. An arm grabs onto your wrist. He quickly moves your hand positioning on the blade, huffing when satisfied. “That was great Y/N!” 

You nod your head, ready for some pointers or any sort of criticism. But Rengoku just stands a couple feet away, and waits for another attack. You grip the knife, and try a different strategy, instead aiming for his feet. It’s useless, he jumps away. “Creative!”

You huff from the exertion and glare at him. Frustrated at the lack of advice, you speak up. “You are supposed to be teaching me.”

He flashes you a grin. “I am!”

“No, you’re not. Your toying with me. How am I supposed to get any better?”

“I actually think you are great at self-defense! And with me around you will never be in danger. I think its time to head inside for the night!”

When he turns to walk away, you jump in front of him, clutching the base of the knife. “Kyo, this is training for when you are gone.”

His eyes flicker to the blade, and for a moment, his voice is flat. “If you want to continue, keep swinging at me.” You obey his command and try to slam your arm into his shoulder. He continues, voice now expressing more of his emotions, “Why do you keep bringing that up? We will deal with that later!”

You scan the area for where he landed after the dodge. “Your mission is bound to end soon. I know how these things work, my father told me about it. You will leave and it will be soon.”

With a swipe to his collarbone, he jumps back behind you, and you feel his hand caress your neck. You shiver at the soft touch of his calloused fingers. His breath is right next to your ear. “Are you forcing me away?”

You clench your teeth at this and try to turn to him, but he has already moved. “Why do you keep saying these things?”

“Because it sounds like you want me to leave. Is that it, Y/N? You’re sick of me already?”

Another swing, you're so worked up that you don’t even care where to aim at.

“No! My god Kyojuro, you are acting so strange!” In an instant, you feel the blade come in contact with flesh and you freeze. Your heartbeat picks up, eyes wide, as you stare at the Hashira.

Blood drips from his hand and feel yourself pale. Your pulse picks up when the Hashira eyes for the first time during this training leave yours. He hisses out in pain and you watch his eyes widen at the wound. 

“Oh. Ow.”

You immediately rush over to him to make sure he was alright. You grip his hand, mind trying to grasp anything your brother has taught you. You half drag him to your cottage, dropping the knife midway. He follows behind you silently, holding his hand up to try to slow the bleeding.

You push him into the nearest chair, and scramble toward the first aid kit your brother left. 

When you return, he’s staring at you silently, like he is waiting for some sort of reaction. You pay no mind to it, trying to stay focused on the task at hand. 

You kneel down in front of him and he jumps, grabbing onto the chair with the other hand. You glance at him with a raised eyebrow, before grabbing his hand and beginning to clean the wound. “I'm sorry. I should have been paying attention. I didn't mean to.”

“Hmm. It really hurts.” His tone comes out whinier than you have ever heard before and you begin to really panic. He was a demon slayer, he must get hurt all the time, and if this was hurting him, then it must have been a sensitive spot.

When you pour alcohol on the injury, he hisses and you place a hand on his leg to try to comfort him. You feel his gaze on you, as you hold back tears, the guilt tearing ruthlessly at you.  “I’m sorry. What can I do to make it up to you?”

A smile begins to resurface and you feel better almost instantly. “No more lessons?!” he says, placing the other hand on your head again. 

Why was he so insistent on you not being able to protect yourself? Wouldnt he feel better knowing that you can be safe on your own? 

Maybe he has some sort of traumatic past for self-defense that you don’t know about? You don’t know much about him, so that does sound like a reasonable answer. 

 “Of course! I promise I won't ask again.” 

He beams down at you and your heart begins to pound, like it has been the past couple of days. “Great!”

You nod at him, and his eyes flicker to the hand still placed on his leg. You immediately pull away from him, embarrassed, but he grabs it before you can fully remove it. “One more request.”

You try your best not to blush, as he places the hand back on his leg, and begins to rub his thumb over the back of it. His voice softens, and his stare is unwavering. “You have to dote on me. I’m injured, so you can't leave my side until I have healed.”

You blink slowly, but nod your head automatically. It was his dominant hand that was injured, so he may struggle with basic tasks. Plus, you didn't mind not leaving his side. It’s not like the two of you have not been glued to one another since you met. It wouldnt be that big of a change. “Of course! I'll take care of everything. You don’t have to lift a finger. I’m sorry again, Kyojuro.”

He smiles, with a tilt of the head and picks up your hand, giving it a gentle, but affectionate squeeze. “Nonsense! But Y/N, I need you to promise not to leave my side. Do you understand?”

The intensity in his words makes you hesitate. “Until you are healed?”

His words become more frantic, and the grip on your hand tightens. He refuses to look away from you, the bright eyes seeming to peer into you. “Yes. Can you promise me?”

You had no idea why he was so insistent about this right now, but you give in immediately under his stare. “I promise I won't leave your side.”

He stands up, pulling you up effortlessly with him.“Good! Now, don't you think its time for bed!”

You pause for a second, completely forgetting about the fact that he was spending the night. At night he was off slaying demons, or so you assumed, so you never really saw him past sundown. You glance at the hand and sigh, he must have to stop because of you. You ignore the ache in your heart. You already apologized, it was the best you could do.

“Sure. You can sleep on my brother’s cot. He isn’t here.”

He uses your hand to pull your forward, so you had to look directly up at him. You are used to the forwardness, so when you collide with his chest, you don't even question it. “You just promised,” He says with a cocked head.

“But you won’t need any help when you're sleeping!”

He throws his head back in a laugh. “You never know! Besides, I think–” He hisses out and his eyes fall back to the injury. Your own eyes widen and quickly cup the injured hand, worry plastered on your face.

You are quick to reply, not wanting to make it harder for him. “Okay. I'll bring the cot into my room!” You scramble out, before heading into your brother's room and beginning to drag it over. 

He starts to walk toward you, as to help you, but he stops midway. He glances at his hand, and then sighs gently, fidgeting as he watches you move the cot by yourself.

Once finished you turn to him with a small smile. “I am going to get ready for bed. I can lend you my brother’s sleep attire?” 

“It’s okay! I have clothes under my kimono that I wear to bed.” He says, already peeling himself from the top layer of clothing. You slam the door shut immediately, and you hear the booming laugh from behind the door.

As you head back to wash your face, your mind travels back to the incident. No matter how you think about it, it was strange. He dogged every single one of your attacks without even a hint of a challenge. It was like he wasnt even taking you seriously.

So how did you land a blow? You were just a regular girl and he was a trained Hashira, ready to defend himself at any moment.

Was this on purpose?

But Rengoku wouldn’t do anything sly. He was always kind to you, and a Hashira. Hashira’s don’t trick people, they protect them from people who scheme.

He must have been distracted from the whole self-defense thing. You should really stop doubting his morals.

Out of the corner of your eye, you see a slightly burnt piece of paper on the floor. About the size of a letter. 

Immediately, you wander over to it, confused because you haven't received a letter in a while. Plus, you would have read it before and why was it opened?

When you bend down to pick it up, a hand lands on your shoulder. You jump back in shock, to see a shadowed figure.

You know it’s Rengoku, even in the darkness, his figure is very much defined. But the presence still makes you unnerved. Maybe it’s the fact that you can’t see his smiling face in the darkness. “Kyo?”

His voice is flat. “C’mon, Y/N. Let's go to sleep.”

Your eyes flicker toward the paper on the floor. “Sure, one second I just need to–”

“In the morning. Please? I can’t go to sleep if you aren't there.” You feel the brush of the bandages on the back of your neck. It makes you shiver, and remember his injury. You clench your fist for a second, but sigh and turn around. 

He was right, it will be there tomorrow, and besides it would be hard to read at this time anyways. “Right.”

As the two of you lay next to one another, his non-wounded hand brushing over your face, you make small talk. The two of you whisper in the dark and laugh over nothing important.

He tells you stories of the demons he slayed, and you unconsciously lean even closer to hear them. He is powerful, and kind, and smart, its overwhelming that someone like him is next to you.

You see a hint of a smile in the darkness. “What are you thinking about?” 

“You are so cool Kyojuro.”

His body rumbles with a laugh, quieter than usual since its late and the house is silent. “You praise me too much.”

He leans closer, and the two of you are only a couple of inches apart now. “It’s true. Do you know what I give to be like someone like you?”

The face petting stops for a moment. “I don’t like that idea. It’s too dangerous out there for you. I like the thought of coming home to you, with fresh goods in your hands. Safe and away from any threats”

Your face heats up at the words. He makes it sound so romantic, and to be honest, you don’t mind the idea. But your brother should be home any day now. “I can’t live with you. You know this.”

He hums at you. “What if I told you I have fallen for you?” He murmurs, his voice low and soft. His calloused fingers return to tracing your face.

Your heartbeat picks up, and he must have noticed, because he chuckles lightly. “You like me?” You say, eyes wide, wishing desperately to see his face better in this moment.

“Is that outlandish?”

You look away, instead focusing on the shadows of your fingers. “Well…I don’t know. I’m just surprised.”

“I thought my intentions were clear. Please forgive me, if I confused you.”

It made sense that he was pursuing you. All the stares and the adoring touches. You just didn’t want to think of the possibility of someone as amazing as him liking you. Didn’t want to think of the fact the two of you won’t work out. “No, you didn't, it's fine. I actually like you too…But you are leaving.”

“Come with me. Live with me. I will treat you well. We can be happy together.”

At this point, the two of you were going in circles. You have had this conversation multiple times, and still, he doesn’t seem adamant about giving up. “I won’t leave my brother alone.”

He rolls himself on top of you, most likely annoyed that you weren’t looking at him anymore. He rests his body on his forearm, and his hair brushes your face. His voice is in a hoarse whisper. “You are too kind, Y/N. Think about yourself for once.”

You try your best to ignore the position. His body seems to engulf your own, and it makes you feel unreasonably small, but you’re unwilling to back down. “You know I can't do that. You know what it is like to have a sibling.”

His eyes become wider, and more desperate looking. You can’t meet his stare. “What if he was gone? You would come with me, right?”

Your head snaps back to him, and you look at him in shock. “Why would you say something like that?” You seem to hiss out.

At your tone, he becomes meeker, as if he was hiding into himself. He rubs his forehead against yours, with a hint of a whine in his throat. “Do you even like me?”

You immediately regret what you said, and instead begin to grow concerned. You have never seen him sound so upset before. “I do. I promise I do!”

His head falls into your neck, and his body begins to tremble. “You're causing me so much pain, my flame,” he whines and you begin to internally freak out.

Rengoku was never one to get his emotions involved. He was always upbeat with you, and the fact that he was so hurt over this must mean something big to him.

You place your hand on the back of his head, to try to get him to calm down. He was your idol, and now crush, you didn’t want to see him hurt, but you love your brother.

“If my brother found somewhere to live and be happy with, I would go with you. But he isn’t looking for a wife currently. So, I can't. I would love to, but I can't. I’m sorry, Kyo.”

In a heartbeat, his mood switches. He pulls his head out of your neck and begins grinning from above you. He rubs his nose onto yours, and you on instinct scrunch it up in surprise. “You want to. That's all I need. You want to live with me. Thank you. Thank you, so much!”

He rolls the two of you over so now the both of you are on your cot, with your head on his chest. You smile lightly at him, glad whatever you said finally made him calm down. 

His non-dominant hand rests on the back of your head, and you blush, finally taking in a new position. His body expels warmth, and you find comfort in it. 

Savorying the last amount of time you have with him to the fullest. It’s getting harder to ignore the ache in your chest whenever you think about him leaving.

Slumber begins to take a hold of you, and you listen to the rhythmic sound of the man’s heartbeat.

A couple of minutes go by, and you hear a whisper near your ear. “My flame?”

You hum and try to hold back a smile. “I like the nickname.” 

He chuckles, and your body shakes from the force of it. “Me too. But Y/N, make sure you come back to me. Always. Do you understand?”

You yawn, in your half-sleep state, but mumble out a, “Okay.”

He sighs, and he continues to pet your hair affectionately. “Good. Goodnight. Sleep well, Y/N. Tomorrow is going to be an eventful day.”

But you couldnt hear his warning. You had already fallen asleep the second after you agreed to his strange request.

You are awoken at 2:50 AM the next day by frantic whispers and aggressive shaking to your body. You blink a couple of times and flinch at the harsh light in your face.

Your pupils begin to constrict to the light, and your eyes scan the figure in front of you. Your brother was shaking you awake, with panicked eyes and a lantern in his hands. “What are you doing here? You were supposed to leave!”

He drags you from the cot, and you stumble forward. Your mind finally begins to awake, and you regain consciousness of the situation at hand. “Brother? What’s happening? Are you okay?”

He grabs your hand and pulls you through the small house, scrambling through cupboards looking for something. When he pulls out your father’s sword, you gulp.

He heads back over to you and begins to drag you away. “Didn’t you get the letter? You are supposed to be heading east by now!”

“What’s happening?” You reason again, voice louder and more panicked. He turns to you, and you jump at his appearance, finally able to see him clearly. His hair is a mess, he’s slightly trembling, and he looks like he hasn’t slept in days. 

He grabs onto your both shoulders, and his voice coming out frantic. “A demon. Or maybe multiple. I got messages that people have been disappearing from towns, and some of their….remains have been scattered around villages. It’s traveling from village to village, and yesterday it hit the town where we get our goods. Five innocents are gone and our village should be next. Tonight.”

You stare at him, eyes wide in shock. “Why are you here? You shouldn't have come!”

“I was going to grab fathers sword. We need some sort of protection while we wait until the demon slayer’s corpse comes.” He doesn’t know how to use it, he's a healer, and neither do you, but it was better than nothing. Especially if the two of you were without a home until everything clears up. 

“Grab your knife. Everything going to be okay. Just trust me. Everything is going to be fine,” He mumbles, seemingly trying to comfort himself more than you. He begins to drag you toward the door and you begin to reach in your pocket for your father’s knife.

It wasnt there. You lost it when you cut Rengoku.

Your eyes widen when you finally realize his disappearance. You turn around and quickly scan the room before your brother pulls you completely outside. 

“Kyo-” A hand covers your mouth immediately.

Your brother looks at you in pure fear, and you feel your own bubbling up at his gaze. “Quiet. We have to be as silent as we can. It could be near,” He whispers at you, and you nod from behind his hand. 

Your eyes dart around the area for the demon slayer. But he is nowhere to be found. He’s probably out looking for it by now. 

But he’s injured. Is it really okay for him to be fighting in his state?

Your brother removes his hand from your mouth and begins to drag you forward, a sword in one hand and your hand in the other. You gulp and follow him in the darkness.

A couple of minutes go by and the two of you haven’t said a word. The both of you had heard eerie noises, and you swear you heard a woman’s scream far off in the distance.

Your mind flashes back to all of the villagers you have gotten close to. It was better not to think about it. Rengoku should be there soon.

The two of you took the path into the woods. It was not the normal path to take when heading eastward, but it was safer. You both knew the woods well, and the chances are the demon is raiding the village. That’s what they have targeted the last couple of days at least.

Suddenly, you hear a growl to the right of you guys. Your brother freezes, and you run into the back of him. Your heartbeat picks up, and the hair on your neck rises. Your brother is trembling in front of you.

You turn to noise to see three bright yellow eyes staring at the two of you. A deathly aura creeps on the two of you, and it’s pin-drop silent.

Your brother grabs you by the shoulders and pushes you forward yelling out, “Run!”

As on instinct, you turn back to him to pull him with you, but he’s gone. As if he vanished into thin air. The eyes disappeared as well.

A mass amount of dread and fear weighs on top of you, as you begin frantically scanning the woods. Your heartbeat is pounding in your chest and you’re shaking out of your wits. “Brother? Brother, where are you!”

Tears begin to form in your waterline, and you begin running, searching desperately for any trace of him. In the back of your mind you know your not going to be able to do anything, but it doesn’t stop you from trying.

You wish Rengoku was here. He would be able to find your brother in a heartbeat, but he was most likely in the village. Where the demon should have been. But it doesn’t stop you from calling his name desperately for help.

Which is exactly how you attracted your very own demon. Your brother told you to be quiet, and you should have listened better. Fear made you naive.

It was standing in front of you, its eyes seemingly pinning you down. It was smiling at you, showing off its razor-sharp teeth, and you take a step back. You were trembling, alone, and defenseless against the demon.

“What’s a young girl like you doing out here alone?” The voice was high in pitch and shrill. A step toward you.

You don't respond, eyes darting around for an exit, while the demon continues to laugh and move forward, closer toward you.

You turn around and run. You dont have many choices in this situation and you rather take a chance than be a sitting duck.

It didn’t work, but you knew it wouldn’t. The demon grabs at your leg and pulls you back toward him. You fall forward onto the ground and hiss at the feeling of rock digging into your skin. You are being pulled backward, and the clawed hand on your ankle makes you shiver.

“I think I will take my time with you,” The being coos, licking a stripe up the back of your leg. 

Tears stream down your cheek as try to kick it off, to no avail. It’s going to tear your limps apart and eat you. Your brother is not going to be saved, and your family line is going to end.

With your last plea, you begin to scream. Loud enough to most likely alert every living being in the forest. Even the demon hisses out in annoyance.

Suddenly, there is a flash of orange and red. A flame.

You hear the plop of a sliced head a second later, and the slicing sound of the demon’s arm being physically removed from your leg. You cringe at the sound, but relief immediately floods your veins.

You turn your head to the side to see Rengoku, slightly frowning in concentration while he sheathes his sword. When he catches your eye, he smiles, and the comforting action makes the tears continue to flow.

He's holding you in an instant, crouched on one knee while wrapping his arms around your figure. His eyes are wide with slight panic, and his grip on you is tight. In any other situations, it may have been overbearing, but you craved the warmth.

His voice is hoarse and seemed to have a waver in it. “I was so scared, my flame when I couldn't find you. I thought you really left me. Or something worse had happened to you. The thought makes me feel ill. Tell me, why were you in the woods? You weren't supposed to be in the woods!”

You take a couple of deep breaths to calm yourself down, while he runs his hands up and down your body as if reassuring himself that you are actually there. “We were trying to–” You freeze, eyes widening and immediately squirming in his grasp. “My brother. We have to find my brother! A demon has him!”

His hold on you doesn’t let go, and your movement is futile. He stares into the distance as if almost entranced by something. He doesn’t say anything for a long second, but when he does, his voice seems to be in a whisper. “Does it now?” 

You don’t pay attention to the tone, too distracted by the thought of your brother being on the verge of death. “Yes! So we have to go. Kyo, we don't have time!”

He hums, and the grip on you loosens, allowing you to stand up, and away from him. He stands in front of you, calm and composed while staring at you. You, on the other hand, are scanning the woods frantically trying to figure out where the demon is and failing miserably.

“Let’s go this way,” You say with uncertainty, pointing to the direction where you had last seen him. When you take a step forward, a hand grips your wrist, and you make eye contact with his owl-like eyes.

“You will stay. I will find him for you. It’s too dangerous for you.” The statement is unwavering as if it was a command to you, with no room for question.

“But-”

“Don't be afraid, my flame. I will place you in a tree, safe and hidden from harm.” He didn’t understand that you did not care for your own safety, it was your brother that you were concentrated with.

You turn to him with pleading eyes. The idea of you sitting here while your brother could be getting murdered, makes you feel sick. You need to be there for him the second Rengoku saves him. “Please, I won't get in the way! I can help, please just don’t leave me behind.”

His eyes widen at the statement, and he grips onto your shoulders with both hands. “I would never leave you behind. Never in a thousand years. But I am not the type of person to put the one I care about in danger. You will sit on a branch until I grab you. Safe from harm.”

He scoops you up with ease, and you jump with slight surprise. Then, he walks over to the nearest tree. “Please?” You plead for the last time, and he smiles at you.

“Everything will be fine, my love. After tonight, everything will be perfect. Just let me do this.” He murmurs and you sigh, and allow him to do whatever must be done. 

He walks up to the nearest tree and eyes it, before making a small huffing sound. Then he holds you in one arm and jumps. Way higher than a normal man would be able to you, and your eyes widen in shock.

He grabs onto a branch and pulls the two of you up, while you continue to stare at the fact that he is doing this effortlessly with one hand. He sets you down onto the branch, with your back leaning on the trunk for support.

You glance down and gulp. It was way higher than you expected, but Rengoku didn’t seem to notice it. He is balanced on the branch with ease and instead is focused solely on you. “You will be okay, do not fret. If anything goes amiss, shout for me and I will come running.”

You nod your head and he smiles softly. He begins to turn around but pauses when you grip his kimono. “You will save him right?”

He blinks at you and sightly frowns. “Everything will be alright.”

You believed him.

You were an idiot. An idiot for believing him. An idiot for jumping out of the tree in the first place.

Not long after Rengoku left you, you heard your brothers scream.

You acted on pure instinct. You moved within a second, trying to climb down the tree. The Hashira made it seem easier than it was to maneuver on the tree. You slipped and fell. 

You hissed when you landed on the floor. Very much close to breaking your legs, but you got lucky. You stand up and try to ignore the pain shooting up your spine. Then, you turn toward where you heard the noise.

It was during your sprint you realized you made a mistake. What were you going to do against a demon? How are you going to help your brother? He was the one medically trained, not you. Aren’t you just going to make things worse? You could be killed too.

But you were too deep in it now. Tree trunks turn into a blur as you continue to run, your legs throbbing with every step. 

You notice a figure and stop immediately. When you catch your breath and notice who it is, you cover your mouth. Your father’s sword lays next to the curled-up body. There was so much blood, he was barely recognizable. 

But you couldn't keep your eyes trained on your loved one. Crouching above him was a demon, chewing. 

Nausea hits you like a train and you’re forced to take a step back. You dont have it in you to scream for help. Would Rengoku even get here in time?

Where is he? What was he doing all this time? He told you everything is going to be fine, why is your brother laying in a pool of his own blood?

You continue to stare, the fear making you immobile. You take in the demon. It was strange, nothing like the one you had last saw. It was trembling before the body, as if afraid of something. It’s letting out disgusting wavering whines and cries, between each bite. 

Your thoughts are cut short. 

A shiver runs up your spine, and you freeze. You see the hair on your arms begin to raise, and your breath catches. Your eyes flicker back to the body, and the demon hasn’t moved. 

A nail as sharp as a dagger, trails its way up your arm, and you begin to tremble. You feel the power the demon emits, and it is different from the one before. 

You shouldn't have moved. You shouldn't have left the tree.

You hear the horrific noise before you can feel it. Your eyes flicker to the space right above your hip, to see the long fingernail peering out. Through you. And in an instant, you hear the squelching noise, and the finger is gone. 

Like a dog lapping a bone, you hear the demon lick its finger clean and shiver.

You hear frantic, nervous mumbles behind you. “Just a taste is fine. It’s alright if I have just a taste. I didn’t kill her, just wanted to try it…”  The being that made your skin crawl, sounded absolutely petrified. You didn’t know of what, and you didn’t want to find out. 

But, you didn’t have time to ponder. Your kimono is turning a deep red, and you feel the blood beginning to drip down to your legs. You fall to your knees with wide eyes, not knowing what to do. If you don’t wrap it, you are sure to bleed out within minutes.

The demon behind you panics, frantically telling himself that you aren’t going to die and everything is fine. But you’ve tuned it out.

You look up toward your brother again and freeze. Just a couple feet to the right of the two figures was a man leaning against a tree. The fiery hair that you could pinpoint in a crowd makes him recognizable in less than a second.

Rengoku was watching your brother get devoured with a blank stare.

The loss of blood had to make you see things. Or maybe it was the fear. Something had to be wrong with you. He would never do such a thing.

You clutch at your side with your hand. “Kyo?” You mumble, and his head snaps toward you, somehow hearing the call. He removes himself from the tree in an instant, and he stares at you with wide frantic eyes. You’ve never seen him look so petrified. 

In a blink of the eyes, and a flash of a flame you hear the demon behind you getting beheaded. “She isn’t dead! You promised! I was–” Another slicing sound and silence.

He’s by your side in the next second. He’s tearing off his kimono in an instant. “What are you doing here? Y/N, you're not supposed to be here! Fuck, the bleeding.” He’s tearing apart the cloth with his teeth, and wrapping it around your torso. You don't notice the shaking of his hands.

You feel dizzy and weak, from the mix of the bleeding out and all the other beatings you sustained. You can’t focus on his words, you are staring at your brother.

You miss the panic of his words. The way he trembles in front of you. “It's going to be okay. Don’t worry, I will take care of everything. It'll be okay.”

The demon has scrambled off, and it was just his mutilated body left behind and the sword. Tears well up in your eyes, and your brother’s now lifeless eyes stare into yours. 

You point to him and Rengoku follows your finger. Your words are soft, broken. “Help him. Please.”

But he ignores you. You're being lifted again, the callused hand putting a decent amount of pressure on the wound. He leads you back to your house, while your left staring at the body left in the grass. 

You're exhausted, you can't fight him. For the last time, you plead, “Help him.” before closing your eyes and slumping against his body. 

“It's going to be alright, my flame. I won't let anything happen to you. I will protect you now.”

#rengoku x reader #yandere! rengoku #fem! reader #rengoku fanfiction #rengoku kyojuro #rengoku #kimetsu no yaiba rengoku #kimetsu rengoku #rengoku kyōjurō #kimestu no yaiba #x reader #reader insert #yandere #kny fanfiction #kny x reader #kny rengoku #kny kyojuro #kyojuro x reader #yandere! kyojuro #mello.writes

[biteofcherry]

Getting caught in a downpour with Bucky, by the time you guys make it to shelter your little sundress is clinging to every curve and your nipples are showing and you're soaked

Meanwhile Bucky is like 👀👀

This may have turned not the way you expected, sorry 🙈

A splash of courage

Bucky Barnes x female reader

warnings: none! 😱 a tiny dose of nudity and a hint at smut, but overall it's just pure, sweet fluff

word count: 2.1k

Though the day started sunny, hence your choice of a sweet, flower-patterned sundress, the sky bore strokes of gray clouds when you exited the library. 

It was still warm, the slight breeze tickling your skin with a lick of early summer heat. You hoped the wind would chase the clouds away, too. At least until you get home. You needed this day to go as least catastrophic as it could.

It would be the first time Bucky visits your place. 

To ease your anxiety and make both of you feel more comfortable, you agreed on spending the afternoon together. Bucky wanted to cook lunch together and maybe watch something. Keeping it in the broad daylight meant less stress at the prospect of spending time in the intimacy of your apartment. 

Though you craved intimacy with Bucky. 

He was sweet and caring, flirtatious enough to have your heart racing and your fingers helping you out at night as you thought of him; but he was never too pushy. When you visited his place - which he shared with his best friend, Steve - Bucky kept himself close enough that his warmth accelerated your pulse, but made no move to push your boundaries. 

Oh, he made no secret of the fact he was into you. That he wanted the kisses to lead to more. That he wanted to kiss not only your lips, but other spots on your body. 

“Mhm, doll, I wonder if you’re as sweet all over.” He murmured after parting from your swollen, kiss-reddened lips, his hand stroking your upper thigh.

That need grew in you as well. The first few dates he took you on were a dizzying rush of excitement and romanticism. The more you met casually, on a daily basis, the closer you drifted to each other. Your touches became bolder.

You were still shy about making the first move, however.

Compared to Bucky, you had very little experience. It made you feel awkward at times, especially when Bucky seemed so smooth and confident in sexual matters. 

Asking him over to your place was your first step of your own courage to someday (soon, you hoped) ask him to touch you all over. To ask him to make you come. Just like you imagined when you used your fingers, or your small, cute vibrator. 

For now, you focused on the sweet afternoon you were about to spend together. However mundane the things you did were, Bucky’s company never failed to improve your mood.  

You trotted down the library steps and looked around, searching for him. Bucky was supposed to meet you in front of the library, on his way back from the gym. 

You looked for him among the colorful crowd of people that passed by, some students mingling around the stairs, a few tourists taking pictures. Your head jerked up when you heard Bucky calling your name. 

A smile instantly beamed on your face upon seeing him. Your step gained a little bounce to it as you walked towards him. 

“Hey, doll.” Bucky’s broad smile radiated sunshine that was currently seeping through thickening layers of clouds. 

He put a hand on your waist as he leaned down to give you a greeting kiss. A soft, lingering peck that evoked butterflies in your stomach.

His hand found yours when you pulled apart, fingers intertwining in a gesture that became easy and natural for you over the past weeks. Bucky readjusted his gym bag over his other shoulder and playfully tugged on your hand.

“Ready?” It melted your heart that he checked in with you every step of the way, making sure you were comfortable with things even as simple as spending a day cooking and being lazy on the couch. 

“Yes, Bucky.” You replied, matching his steps as you walked across the street. 

A rumble of thunder boomed over the treetops when you were strolling through the park, interrupting your conversation about a book you were currently reading and which Bucky already finished a few weeks ago. 

“Crap, we better walk faster.” You laughed nervously as you glanced up at the dark sky peeking through the branches. 

“Don’t lose your sandals as you try to match my steps.” Bucky teased, but his hand tightened its hold and he pulled you closer to him. 

Rain poured down less than three minutes later, catching you in the middle of the park. You squeaked as cold, heavy drops splashed across your body. Water trickled between your joined hands, making your palms slippery. Bucky squeezed your hand tighter, but didn’t let go. 

“Come on, let’s hide in the gazebo!” He pulled you with him, the both of you now running across the grass toward a round, roofed shelter.

A few people already hid there, shaking and muttering quiet curses at the weather. You and Bucky jumped inside with laughter; yours more breathless than Bucky’s. Perhaps you should join him at the gym in the future, to improve your fitness a bit.

“Hopefully it’s one of those rapid summer storms.” You said, watching the downpour cascade just a few inches from your faces. 

The air still held some warmth, but being soaked head to toe made you shiver. 

You glanced down at your feet, pink nail polish on your toenails chipped in a few spots. Your sandals were drenched, leather turning darker and a bit abrasive against your skin. Your sundress clung to your body, delicate fabric becoming close to see-through as it stuck to your curves. 

Bucky’s gaze, always so attentive, turned darker as he looked at you. 

Drops of water were sliding down your neck, dipping into the valley between your breasts. Your nipples hardened, two vivid points drawing attention to your chest as you caught your breath. Pretty sundress, which was short enough it gave him a stroke as you bounced down the library steps, now seemed even shorter - the fabric clinging to your ass and hips, sticking between your thighs. 

His hands itched to run up your legs, roll the sodden fabric off your body and lick the water from your skin. 

Bucky noticed your shiver. As well the way you wrapped your arms around yourself, somehow curling in on yourself.

He suspected it may not be from the cold alone, but from the stares you were receiving from the two men who were also hiding in the gazebo. A flare of anger snapped him to attention. He dropped his gym bag down and crouched to rummage through it. 

“Here, doll,” Bucky offered you his hoodie. “It may be a bit stinky, but it’s dry and-”

You took it from Bucky’s hand without hesitation. It was thick, but so soft you nearly moaned in delight as you put it on. The sleeves were too long and the size of it swallowed you, but it provided instant warmth.

And it smelled of Bucky.

“Thank you.” You sighed, smiling up at him. 

You went on your tiptoes to give him a kiss; one of your hands resting on his chest, the other weaving into wet ringlets of his hair at the back of his head. 

When fifteen minutes later the storm passed, Bucky took your hand again and you raced toward your place. It was better not to risk another rainfall to catch you.

You were both giggling at the squishy sounds Bucky’s shoes were making as he walked up the stairs to your apartment. 

“I hope we don’t catch a cold.” You ushered Bucky inside the warmth of your apartment. 

“It would be best if you take a hot shower.” Bucky dropped his bag by the door, to not bring more water further inside. He took off his water-filled shoes, his socks were completely soaked. 

“I have a dry set of clothes in my bag, so I can change here.” He offered. “I’ll make us some tea, too.”

“Yeah?” You looked at him, melting from his thoughtfulness all over. 

From the way Bucky looked, too.

His shirt was already tight on his broad chest, water made it cling to him, underlining muscles that rippled beneath the fabric. The hem of his tee rolled up on his belly, exposing a stripe of skin right above his jeans. 

A single drop trailed slowly from his navel, disappearing beneath the waistband of his pants. 

A few times you had the opportunity to feel what was hidden behind his zipper. When you made out and your thighs spread, and Bucky grinded into you just right, you felt the hardness. Sometimes, afterwards, you laid in your bed and tried to draw the outline of it in your mind, assess its size and girth…

You quickly shifted your gaze back to Bucky's face, feeling embarrassed for staring. Bucky’s mouth was curved in an amused, quite pleased smile, but he made no comment about your moment of daze. 

Like you, when Bucky’s eyes roamed over you in the gazebo; his gaze undressing, betraying dirty, hot thoughts. Which you wouldn't mind coming true.

“Okay, yeah.” You cleared your throat, turning on your heel to save yourself from further embarrassment with an escape. “I’ll bring you a towel!” You called over your shoulder as you opened the door to your bedroom.

With fingers still on the knob, barely a full step inside, you stopped. A thought crossed your mind. Impulsive, a little reckless perhaps, but you couldn’t shake it off as it unfurled along with heat in your belly. 

You swallowed nervously and slowly turned back around. 

You walked up to Bucky, holding his gaze. Toe to toe, you stood there in front of him. With surprisingly sure fingers, you pulled the hoodie off of your body and tossed it aside. Leaving you standing in a soaked dress, with every line of your body visible to Bucky’s hungry gaze. 

“I think-” you started shyly, but adamant on not cowering- “we should take a hot shower together.”

Bucky’s eyes glinted with cold fire. His gaze remained on your face as he moved his feet wider apart, standing so much closer to you that you felt the heat of him graze your skin. 

“Are you sure, babe?” With how low his voice dropped, you knew it took a lot of his willpower to not be touching you already.

As an answer, you took the drenched sundress off in one smooth motion. 

Letting it drop to the floor with a wet splash, you tilted your chin up and arched your chest forward, boldly displaying yourself in front of Bucky. Pink lace of your bra and panties was equally soaked. 

You were becoming wet, too. Especially at the prospect of being naked with Bucky. 

His eyes remained trained on your face a moment longer, before he slowly dragged them down your body. It felt as if every inch of your skin was burning up just from his gaze swiping over you. 

“You’re beautiful.” Bucky murmured and reached out his hand to touch you. “So fucking gorgeous.”

His hand caressed your side, his other arm wrapping around you, hand dipping to spread over your ass. Bucky leaned down. His mouth ghosted across your cheek, warm breath chasing off tiny drops that lingered there. 

When his lips pushed against yours, you arched with a gasp. Mouth parting willingly, allowing Bucky’s tongue in. The way his tongue rubbed against yours urged you to rock your hips against his thigh in a needy rhythm. 

“How about-” Bucky pulled merely an inch from your lips, hot breath mingling with yours. “We take a shower and then dry off in your bed?” 

He kneaded your ass and you groaned, your fingers slipping beneath Bucky’s wet t-shirt. 

“It’s our first time together, I wanna enjoy it thoroughly.” He nipped your lip as his other hand ventured up, fingers teasing the lace of your bra. “Shower sex can be fun, but not practical for a long session I plan for you.” 

“Now you’re just bragging.” You chuckled, pulling his t-shirt up.

“Wait and see, doll.” Bucky snapped the strap of your bra against your shoulder, grinning at your little yip. 

He complied to your unspoken demand when you started tugging his tee upwards, lifting his arms and taking it off completely. Your palms instantly splayed on his chest, fingers tracing lines of his muscles. 

“Come on, baby. Let’s warm up in that shower first.” Bucky grasped your wrists gently, lifting each to his mouth to kiss it. “There’ll be plenty of discovering and touching involved there, too.” 

Bucky picked you up with ease, your legs wrapping around his hips. A surprised laugh bubbled on your lips, shifting into a soft moan as your breasts pressed into Bucky’s naked chest. 

Outside, another thunder rumbled.    

#dumbgothbunny #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x female reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes #my writing #a splash of courage

[mono-dot-jpeg]

morning routine - jingyuan

summary; just a lion and his cub waking up

genre/extra tags; fluff, quite a bit of fluff, jingyuan is a single father no drama (/ref), reader is younger than yanqing

[platonic] [5-9 year old! reader] [gender neutral reader]

word count; 523

a/n; this made me realize that i dont remember the last time i watched the lion king. but nonetheless, i am a man of the people and i give them what they want (within reason). it's kind of close to the scene im pretty sure you're talking abt but i just changed it a bit. hope you enjoy!

also i realized, looking at jingyuan's art, mimi has a mane so mimi would realistically be a boy, no? but like mimi is referred to it/its. i mean honestly mimi being a boy is cute to me KSDJKSJ and also it makes sense since mimi had a mane and lionesses dont. whatever-

daylight burns into the window, waking you up earlier than your lazybones dad. but to be fair, anyone could wake up earlier than him. he was a hardworking man. for the most part. but he was a single father too. your father.

you cherish the time you spend with him every day. you may not know everything but he teaches you everything. he tells you of the world you both live in, how there is war and peace, how someday you would have to lead alongside him and yanqing. you were enamored with the world that people have helped build. and you were determined to help protect it.

but for now, you can still be a kid.

"dad!" you press a hand on his face, squishing his cheek. "dad wake up!" you push against him, hearing his grumbling as he turns to face away from you. "dad!" you whined. you brush your head against his heavy white locks as if you were a cat. "we were gonna spend the day together. wake up!"

"you wake up earlier than me, are you sure you're my kid?" he jokes tiredly as he laughs.

"come on! let's go papa!" you climb over him, earning a grunt and groan as you slide off the bed. you make your way to get ready. you see mimi striding out of his bed, yawning and stretching. "hi mimi! good morning!" you greeted the large lion, who brushes against you chuffing a tired greeting. "papa! hurry!" you called out to him, you can hear your father shuffling around the bedroom and grumbling his responses.

you feel yourself get picked up before you can open the bathroom door. you laugh as jingyuan tosses you up for a moment and catches you, holding you under his arm like a sack of flour. "you already have too much energy in the morning. we have some time to relax."

"you promised you would teach me today!" you squirmed in his hold as he opens the door to the bathroom.

"well, let's not get too hasty." he hummed, placing you on your feet and onto your step stool in the bathroom. he doesn't say it out loud but he wonders how much faster you're going to grow up or how much faster you want to grow up. "i'll teach you when the time is right. for now, you have to learn how to be a kid."

"but 'm already a kid! i wanna be like you!" you start to brush your teeth. jingyuan takes his time to get you ready as he's fixing your bedhead and pinching your cheeks, making you whine through your brushing.

he smiles gently, "you don't need to be me. you can be you. the world is yours, alright?" he pats your head as you nodded rapidly.

when you finish brushing your teeth, you raise your arms to him to get carried. he obliges and you hug him tightly. "i'm gonna make this world the best for us!"

"well, you have to get out of your pajamas first for that." he chuckles, pressing his forehead against yours as a sign of affection.

#honkai star rail x reader #honkai jing yuan #honkai x reader #honkai jingyuan x reader #jingyuan x reader #hsr jingyuan #hsr jing yuan #hsr x reader #honkai star rail #hsr jingyuan x reader

[justgrey]

I have something worse up my sleeve on Vander that idk if im gonna post that includes the shimmered up version of him we see for 10 seconds before he dies and some bussy gobbling if yk what i mean 😈🥱🔥

Vander x Reader - General Relationship HC's

Warnings: Swearing cuz we fukin' balling

Beefy

b e e f y

He gives really great hugs, obviously. He's got so much meat on him that he feels like a really large pillow, and I'm here for it. And if you're reading this, I guess you're for it too 🤷‍♂️

Crazy protective, too. Man doesn't love easily after what happened with Silco, but when he does, mwah, you are not leaving his sight for longer than an hour before someone on his side is just "keeping an eye on you"

Vander loves jokes. Especially dad jokes. Because he's a dad. Please joke with him. Please, his kids always respond with "ughghh" and all he wants is an adoring audience. Please be that for him.

"What's the time?"

"It's... time to get a watch!" *big goofy grin*

"Hah- hahahahhahahahhaahhaahhaha please, Vander."

"Right, sorry. It's a quarter past seven, love."

👉👈

Anyway, Vander loves nicknames. Like, a lot a lot. He loves nicknames. What one's? Great question. Take a guess. He loves playing games with you and this is one of those games

Guess.

If you said anything along the lines of sweetheart, love, sweetie, or honey. You'd be right. He loves using generic nicknames with you because he wants to be as domestic as possible.

He likes to feel like his life is as normal as can be despite it being absolutely the opposite of that. He loves his children, and he loves you, so why not make the most of it? At least, that's what he figures.

The wackiest shit happens sometimes. There's a real mix of interactions in his little family and we living for all of them.

"Can you pass the sa-?"

*glitter bomb explosion from Powder's bunk*

"Oh, for the love of- POWDER, ARE YOU OKAY?!?"

His kids are all extraordinary. Mylo is very charismatic and is able to talk his way out of a lot of trouble, Claggor is great at lifting heavy shit, Vi can punch the daylights out of everyone, and Powder has the potential to be a great inventor someday. His goal is to inspire them all to be the best versions of themselves and to always be kind when they're able to despite living in the meanest area around.

You are also very intertwined with his children's lives to the point where they're basically your kids as well. If you didn't want that, break up with him. He's a package deal. All or nothing.

"Hey... what's that you're tinkering with, Pow Pow?"

"It's a bomb."

"It's a what."

"She means- uhm- it's full of confetti...? For... For Mylo's birthday! Y'know, that's totally coming up soon."

"Wait, my birthday isn't-"

"Yeah, yeah... for Mylo's birthday!" *innocent smile*

"For some reason... i d o n ' t b e l i e v e t h a t . . . Just... just stay out of trouble. As much as possible."

The kids treat you like a member of the family as well if you couldn't tell. They latch onto you, some take longer than others but they all eventually view you as their other parent.

First it was Powder, then it was Claggor, followed by Vi and then Mylo a little later on.

Vander actually wants to make it official with you someday and make you stay with him and his family forever by proposing to you, but with the current state of the Undercity, he may never get to. He's a busy, busy man, trying to hold the Lanes together. Sometimes, he gets too focused on that and forgets to share his attention around when crime is really bad.

But even just being around helps him out 🫡

Thanks gang 👍

#vander x reader #arcane #arcane vander #vander arcane #arcane vander x reader #arcane x reader #i love men #big beefy men #i need a big beefy man #where da bears at #jinx #powder #arcane jinx #arcane vi #arcane mylo #arcane claggor

[gingkos-eldritch-secret]

Fanfiction commentary and recommendations: Lex Luthor´s ascend from supervillainy to fatherhood Part II (chapters 6 to 10)

For the (probably nonexistent) person who wants to know where to find the other parts:

Part I

Part III

Part IV

Part V

Part VI

Part VII

What follows is the commentary for the next few chapters. For the simple reason that i have not yet named it as part of why this fanfiction is so good: It has a pretty decent (read: for a normal person a quite long) chapter lenghth - perfect for just cuddling up somewhere with a mug of tea or any other hot beverage of choice and keep on reading. As the full lenghth of this fic has as of this day reached around 500k words and there are still 59 to go you, there is still quite a bit to discuss!

I do hope I don´t just regurgitate the story itself, but we´ll see how it goes.

I want to try to include some things that may count as spoilers. I´ll put the spoilers in using this:

So if you see this - there may or may not be a spoiler here but at least you can ignore the text if it important to you?

○○○••○○•••○○••○○○

Okay so there´s been a time jump between the fifth and sixth chapters. And what do we see? Danny as well as Lex struggling with a few important revelations.

The first one being Danny even realizing that: yes, he actually IS smart. Who would ever question that with the number of languagges Danny even speaks? And with all the knowledge he has about astrophysics? Or even how he is able to tinker with his parent´s weapons and actually understanding them? But no.

Our boy has been told he was the dumb one in the family for long enough, that is was an actual surprise for him to realize how well he has placed in his placement tests. And it does break my heart a little to know what must have gone down to behave like that …

But that´s only just really scratching the surface, isn´t it? Because what follows is Lex being a worried parent and realizing that his son has been left reeling with a realization.

Because Danny, now that school is about to start again, knows that he can´t just leave soon anymore. He has built somewhat of a life in this dimension. He as people he cares about. He´s about to continue his schooling here. And our boy? Has not wanted to think about the repercussions.

So here he sits. In his room. Devastated after months in this dimension because … he´s happy here. He´s happy and he doesn´t want to be happy. Doesn´t want to be safe because this? This isn´t home. And how my heart hurts when I read this.

A child should feel save at home. They shouldn´t be forced to literally fight for this sense of safety. But he was. And now all of this tension is just gone and it feels good and in a way he feels as if he´s betraying his family and friends. Which I completely understand. But - he should get to feel save too.

What I do find a funny kind of satisfaction in is just how Lex continues to bash Danny´s parents. Because as bad as it sounds: it´s all the truth. And that it is probably just makes it a much harder pill to swallow. Poor boy, but he´ll understand. Someday. Probably?

All in all: this chapter is just such a wholehearted conversation that I´m a bit sad to see it go. But it just gets better from there because it continues with a mind controlled superman and Danny deciding he´s got to do something about it. Which he does. By absolutely beating the living daylights out of him. Lex gets a very satisfying video out of it and by god, is the fight scene nicely written. Another wonderful little thing to point out is how lex explains to Danny how 'Superman´s been mind controlled again' and then just does not stop bashing him xD Wonderful scene tbh, i need more of snarky Lex!

After the fight? The Justice League gets CURIOUS. And a curious justice league? I don´t know if that would do Danny all too much good, not that they care at this point. He could be a danger after all.

And to be honest? I fear for the day they may try and interrogate Danny as Phantom. Though I have not yet decided if I fear more for Danny or the League. He´s slightly (very) unhinged after all.

Also: Danny lands on the news! And on Twitter! And oh my god, does Twitter have THINGS to say about the whole thing.

And boy oh boy - Twitter loves Danny! From his looks to his smarts and his relationship with Lex or his sassiness: everything gets discussed and it´s just so funny to see this happening from an outside point of view xD

What also follows is the funniest Twitter discourse i have seen in a while. It does include Danny non-stop snarking at Lex so it is an absolute win for me xD

Also: people find out about his and Cass´relationship and they are very enthusiastic about it. Or at least, that´s one way to put it xD

Even though it´s only friendship. For now. I swear to god they´re not gonna stay friends for long before they´re in a committed relationship with each other.

Which Bruce apparently also knows. He´s already plotting the shovel talk. Is it bad that i want to see that discussion go down?

Alfred just being the absolute sweetheart that he is being like 'Cassandra can can take care of herself silly son'. It´s just so wholesome?

And with that Arc I ENDS. And it was such a sweet arc :3 Full of heart for sure and the fun also did not get the short end of stick - superman got it instead xD

It´s not the end however as we get to the first interlude, which shows us how Jazz is dealing with the whole situation. 'Not good' may be an understatement to be honest.

She has to accomodate so many things: what her parents did to Danny, what they did (and also did not) do while they were 'raising' them, how to deal with the negelct and sometimes borderline abuse, how to deal with college and how to search for her brother without losing either herself or her connection to her friends and family…

What probably does not help is that his disappearance has created a rift between Tucker and Sam that seems to get worse as time goes on.

And Jazz? She seems lost. A classic case of older sibling syndrome, not furthered by her study into psychology. She´s spreading herself thin trying to help. Has been doing so for years at this point and to be honest? It feels as if she´s about to snap.

What she does feel for sure is lost. And i can relate. I really, really do. I mean i may not have been in such a dire situation yet (knock on wood), but … i can kind of feel her despair and sadness over these circumstances: She wanted to do more. To help more, but also to finally be free of this burden. She feels as if it´s her fault Danny died. That it´s her fault she couldn´t bring him back. And doesn´t that just mirror Danny´s whole 'I must save the town because i turned on the portal' sacrificial mindset?

The surely are much more similar to each other than they probably think. And if they are gonna see each other again? There are many tears and conversations to be had…

#phandom #dpxdc #dp x dc #danny fenton #danny is lex´ adopted son #danny phantom #lex slowly turning into a parent tm #commentary #Lex Luthor´s ascend from supervillainy to fatherhood #llafstf #danny phantom fanart #dp x dc crossover #Danny being a billionaire magnet #danny being a little shit #people are concerned #twitter loves danny #the justice league just wants to know who phantom is please #they are worried #he beat superman #easily #how #what if he becomes a danger? #To himself or others? #I have the feeling either one or both could become true #Though so far this has been a rather fluffy fic #I smell angst though #I SAW those tags in AO3 #And I am #Concerned #Fanfcition Commentary

[kai-atlantis]

I'm late 😬 but I broke my ankle again so JUST PLEASE ACCEPT MY LATE ENTRIES OKI.

CW: grief, language

Artwork by @irunaki who graciously allowed me to borrow her work

FowlFest Day 2 - Diary Day

A Glimpse in Time

Holly ShOrt!!!

1953 

  HI DIARY!!! Today is MaY 3! It's my bIRTHDAY! I'M 32 today and at skool my class sang to me and gave me kandy! Escept for Riles Ross, cause he stole my space bar and ate iT in fronT of ME! >:( so i hit him in his face and all the kids laughed and Miss Persimmon sent me home. :( bUT I CAME HOME WITH CAKE! and its carrot. Mommy says it looks like our hair! :D cause we have orange hair! Daddy gave me a bow n arrow after cake and said I was a natural! Daddy is so strong he could hold me AND MY CAKE TOGETHER! :D then i got in trouble for hitting Riles Ross, but daddy told me later in secret that he was proud of me. :) 

  Anyway Diary, did you have a good day today? I sure hope so cause I did! I would share my cake with you but i dont wanna get cake on your pages :( sorry. BUT YOU CAN SLEEP WITH ME AND FOXY TONITE! we are having a secret sleep over under the bed. Foxy is so CUTEEE. sHH! Dont tell mommy or daddy. It's only for us :) 

  See ya there! 

Holly Short

1983

Today was fucking bullshit. It was so fucking stupid, I almost don't want to make an entry about it, but my therapist claims it's good for my grief to vent my feelings, so, here I am. Venting my fucking feelings. And no. I don't feel better.

So, you want to know why today sucked. Today was my second day at the Academy. The LEP Academy.

I've always known I was going to be an officer, but lately, I've been compelled to do something more than LEPtraffic, or Immigration. Yesterday was already weird enough because I got tons of looks from all the beefheads, but then today, in my Criminal Investigations class, the professor asked us what our goals in the LEP were. Anyone that knows anything knows girls who join the LEP are destined for traffic, or some bullshit area of "policing". We never go further than that… Unless you're Wing Commander Vinyáya. And nobody is as cool as Wing Commander Vinyáya. She's a total babe. Definitely not me.

But anyway, I have other aspirations. Dad was Internal Affairs. Mom's LEPmarine. It's my destiny to be in the force, and if I'm gonna go in, it's go big or go home. So, I answer that I want to be in Recon. And I shit you not - everyone laughed, even the professor. The FUCKING professor.

Fuck.

Why can't a girl be Recon? We're not all airheads. Some of us are actually capable of handling ourselves. Mom always says my aim is deadlier than a stink worm too, so those townies don't know what they've got coming.

Shit. Said, not says. Mom is dead. Stupid mistake.

Whatever.

The only plus side to today was that I ran into Trouble Kelp. He's the hot Kelp brother. An idiot, but he has a good heart. He's a junior, and super famous for his scores. Everyone knows who he is, so you'd expect him to be a total glow slug, right? But he's actually really kind. Some guy tried to trip me in the hall, and before I could punch the daylights outta him, Kelp shoved him into the trash can and swore him off. It was totally cool. He'd make a good partner someday, I think.

OH! Back to Recon. Adding onto today's bullshit, I overheard some rookies going on and on about Commander Root. Apparently he's a tough nut to crack and hasn't ever had a girl in his unit, and he intends for it to stay that way. Well, too bad for him, because I've got my sights on Recon. I work alone, and fly alone. Nobody to bother me, no stinky males and their gross ear cheese. Just me, the wind, and the surface sky.

It's what mom and dad would want.

I hope they're proud.

Oh yeah, one last thing: it's my birthday today. I'm 62 today. Is it super lame that I put up pictures of mom and dad on the table with me? Just so, you know… I'm not alone?

Fuck. Duh. That's super lame.

Hey. I'm back. Don't mind the weird gap between pages. Didn't feel like writing for a bit so I took a nap. But I'm back.

Honestly? I'm a bit mad. And before you ask me in the session: about everything?

Being a girl is hard enough, right? 'cause I'm stuck in this gnarly place of not being pretty enough yet also not being "tough" enough to be accepted by the guys. And I just started. Why should my appearance fucking matter? I'm a fucking hotshot. I'm resilient. I already know how to pilot a shuttle. That's more than these maggots can do.

My dad would've known what to say. I didn't know him that long, really. But still, when I'd spaz out and tussle with other kids, he'd always have my back, and he always knew the right things to say. I wish I had that now, you know? I miss him.

I miss mom. But I don't want to talk about it. I don't want to talk about her death and I won't be forced into it either, k?

Oh yeah, duh. My original point. It's my 62nd birthday, and I'm all alone. There's supposed to be some junior thing at a pub in the city. Juniors. Not rookies like these dorks. Mom would kill me if I went.

Hah. Guess I should rebel and go make some friends then? Maybe Trouble will be there? Not that I'm into him or anything. Just a friend or two would be nice.

Anyway. I've got basics in the morning.

Night, journal. See ya.

#fowlfest2023 #holly short #artemis fowl #oops im late but hey it's VIRGO SEASON #grief journal

[larissa-the-scribe]

Terrarium Lights, Part 2.1

Continuation of my Inkling's Challenge story, started >>here. Next part >>here. Not sure if I'm supposed to tag @inklings-challenge anymore since times have moved on, but will do so just to be on the safe (the tag may be ignored if so desired). Last time on Terrarium Lights: The ghost disappeared after getting an existential crisis when he realized he didn't know his own name, to everyone's surprise.

"I'm sorry."

Gail nearly jumped out of her skin, scattering her basket of freshly cleaned rocks across the dining room table. She wheeled around toward the kitchen, which had been empty a few moments earlier, to see the lad from before standing sheepishly in the middle of it.

She released her apron and took a deep breath.

"Oh?" She replied—with only a slight quiver in her voice—and allowed him to insert his own explanation.

Truth be told, she wasn't sure what he was apologizing for, unless it was scaring the living daylights out of her. It was, however, reassuring to see him again and to know she wouldn’t be stuck for the rest of her days with the mystery of what on God’s green Earth had happened.

"Well, I feel like I may have overreacted." He was looking at the floor, so she couldn't see the state of his eyes.

"About your memories?" She asked, and then mentally smacked her palm against her forehead. Perhaps it wouldn’t be wise to bring up the incident that had so upset him right the second he came back—in her defense, her heartbeat was still rather drowning out thought.

"Yeah."

"I see." Gail turned back to the table and started picking up the rocks—mostly shale and creek pebbles—from where they'd been flung, gathering her wits with them.

It had been several days since the ghost had come and gone.

At first she toyed with the idea that her mind was going on ahead of her to heaven. They did say solitude did odd things to mind, but while she didn't have concrete proof that the lad had been there, in the end she had decided to regard it as fact until proven otherwise. There were her sodden clothes and her pail of moss, confirming that she'd gone out in the rain at the very least.

After she'd settled that, she started to go over the interaction in her mind.

She had had no idea if he'd come back or not. Her gut reaction was that he would, someday. The whole venture was rather too strange and unfinished—he was clearly haunted by something, still. Whether or not she would be there to see it, she did not know.

Eventually, she decided that if he did return to her, she should handle him with more care and tact, and make him feel more generally comfortable before prodding at him again. That seemed like the best way to figure out what was going on, at least. From there—well, she didn't know. But one so rarely did know what one was doing, so that wasn't a great matter in the long run. Besides, if this was the Lord’s doing, he’d hardly abandon her here. Wasn’t His style.

And here the lad was, once again standing in her kitchen, though this time much shyer and more unsure, and she’d already prodded him more than she meant.

"I appreciate your thoughtfulness," she replied, rubbing her thumb across a smooth piece of shale. "Though I suppose I should apologize, myself, for startling you."

"Well, technically I think that was the kettle," he said with a nervous chuckle.

She snorted. "True. Dreadful loud that kettle is."

As she swept the last bits of rocks towards her, she heard him shuffling his feet. It was an odd sound. Not quite all there. "It… it doesn't seem to be raining anymore."

"Nice and sunny out, indeed." She kept an ear on him, still managing her rocks.

"Um. Thank you for letting me borrow your roof."

The rocks clattered back into the basket. "You're welcome to it as long as you might need."

"…Even if it's not raining anymore?"

She turned back round to face him and smiled. His eyes were a satisfying shade of brown. "Even then."

He beamed back.

Gail walked over to a makeshift desk to the side of the room and started sorting the rocks into their proper containers. Hesitantly, the lad hovered into the doorway between the kitchen and the dining room space.

“I… I still don’t really remember anything,” he said. “I think I have amnesia.”

“I’m sorry to hear that.” Gail gave him a sympathetic look. “I don’t suppose there’s anything I can do to help with that?” She gestured for him to come closer.

“Well, I don’t know.” Like a puppy prepared to be yelled at, he edged further into the house. “In all honesty, the fact that I couldn’t remember anything terrified me. Still does, kind of, but it’s not as shocking now, I suppose. I don’t know why I didn’t realize. I mean, how do you forget your entire life but just not think about it? Doesn’t make sense.” He trailed off with an attempted chuckle.

“Maybe it was something that happened recently?”

He squinted at what she was doing, seemingly half-intrigued about her activity, half-absorbed in his own nervous narrative. “I… I don’t think so. Or maybe the amnesia was recent? I don’t know. I kind of… remembered bits? But it’s very fuzzy, like it might have happened in some odd kind of dream, a long time ago. Or maybe not that long ago. Dreams can be weird. But so can memories. Like when something happens yesterday but it feels like it’s always been your past, that kind of thing. Or at least that’s what last time I was here felt like, I think, but that could just be because that’s all I can remember right now. But I don’t even know how long ago it was that I was here. I get the impression that memories are tricky.”

“True, that,” Gail chuckled. “You said you remembered something, though?” She rubbed her thumb over the ridges of a large creek pebble appreciatively, then dropped it into its jar with a satisfying clink.

“What are you doing?” He asked, tilting his head, curiosity temporarily overshadowing his dilemma.

“Oh, me? Sorting rocks.”

“Why?”

“If I don’t, they’ll just be a mess.” She waved her hand over the assortment. “This way it’s easier to get at the ones I need.” She wasn’t sure if he was dodging the question again or just distracted.

“O-oh.”

She chuckled again. “For terrariums, that is. I’m not just mad about rocks, though I do like them.”

“Terrariums?”

“It’s a hobby of me and my husband’s. While he’s away, I gather materials—and sometimes do a few myself—and then when he’s back, we work on one together.” She was sorting them roughly by size and color. Absently she wondered if she’d need to take a trip to the shore sometime soon to stock back up on driftwood.

“Could I… maybe… see one?” He had his cautious puppy act on again.

Resisting the urge to kid him a bit for his skittishness, she nodded and went to the living room (really only a bulge on the side of the dining room, but still rather nice for sitting), and picked up one of the first ones she and Michael done together, in the bottom of a large, broken canning jar that had once been the size of a small bucket.

“Here,” she said, and held it towards him. “The edges aren’t sharp anymore. We sanded what we could and covered the rest with a sealant.”

It was a simple terrarium, really. Not much more than moss arranged around a large lump of red flint they’d found when wandering along the creek, with a few small little plants stuck in. And the container wasn’t the prettiest, with the sealant smeared across most of the edges around the opening. Still, it was a good memory, so she liked to keep it watered and tended, and even though she didn’t know what kind of moss they’d gathered, it was one of her favorites—it flowered in the summer and smelled lovely.

"Can I touch it?" He asked. When she nodded, he slowly reached out and put his hand in the container, running his fingers along the rock and pressing their tips gently against the moss. "It's so strangely soft and not soft." He looked up and smiled and his eyes were very brown. "It feels nice. Almost scratchy, but comfortable. I like its texture."

"Isn't it just lovely?" Gail agreed. "Moss is one of those things that isn't hard to find, but is still so satisfying every time you do. I think it's one of the marks that God made this world with love."

The lad nodded absently. He was frowning slightly, and for a moment didn't seem quite all there, his edges ever so slightly blurring.

"I think I remember something about moss," he said. "I'm not sure. But it wasn't very green, and there were whole plains of it. Underground, I think. And blue. I think we might have been safe there, but I don't know." He looked back up at her. "Does any of that sound… familiar? Since you know about moss."

The lad looked so hopeful, Gail wished she could say yes. "Well,” she replied, pursing her lips as if in deep thought, “we don't have many caves around these parts. Soil's not built for it. And I don’t profess to know much about the subject one way or the other, but I can't say as I'm familiar with blue moss."

"Oh." Feeling along the edges of where the rock and moss met, he pressed his hand down again, softly. Gail noticed that it did not leave much of an impression, if any. "Maybe it was just the way it looked? Maybe it wasn't blue." He withdrew his hand. "But if there are no caves around here… I don't know. It was certainly underground." He frowned. "Well, I'm pretty sure. I… I guess I can't say for certain, can I? Since I don't know."

Gail resisted the urge to set her terrarium down and pat his back or try to hug him. The poor lad looked frightfully lost. "Perhaps you were a traveler in your time, before coming here. I will admit, I don't know much about what lies beyond my little corner of the world, so who's to say caverns of blue moss might'nt be out there, somewhere?"

Even as she said the words, they felt unlikely. Maybe because she didn't quite believe them herself—but it was true, at least, that she didn't know much about the world beyond Florida, or even beyond this northern slice of it. She could have hope in her own ignorance, for the lad's sake. Perhaps her Michael might know, or she could write to her son up in the Northern colonies. They were both much more widely traveled.

"As your memories come back, mayhaps you might learn to know more about it."

He nodded, stuffing his hands in his pocket, eyes still on the ground. "I hope so. It's… disconcerting, to know so little about what you can trust from your own head."

"We'll figure it out," Gail said, wondering if there was any way to physically console someone who couldn't be touched.

"I… I also really don't mean to drag you into this," he said. "We're both just strangers to each other. I wouldn't want to presume too much on your hospitality."

Gail clucked her tongue at him as she put the terrarium on the table, where he could still find it if he wanted. "Trust me, young man, this would be the best use of my time. I couldn't in good conscience just turn you out, anyway, and well, what can I say? I'm a meddlesome old lady. I like fixing other peoples' problems, if I can."

"Oh." He picked at the edge of his waistcoat. "That's… that's really kind of you. I… I'm not sure what to say to that."

"You don't have to say anything, if you'd rather not. You're welcome to just be here for a bit, if you'd like."

"I… I think I'd like that." He looked up at her again. "I wouldn't be a bother if I just stood by and watched you work?"

"No bother at all." Gail waved a dismissive hand. "I guarantee you'll be a lot easier to work around than toddlers, though admittedly it has been… a few years, since I've had to do that. I'll just be working on a new terrarium, anyway, for old Mrs. Oberson. She's been quite sickly for a while now, and having living things about you really brightens a room up."

He followed her back to the desk, where she pulled out a largeish jar and set it up, hunting down the different components she needed from the desk, and adjusting her glasses to a higher zoom setting to better view the details. The plan for this terrarium lay on a card pinned to the desk, half-recipe, half-sketch. Michael had helped her come up with it before he left, and now was as good a time as any to get it going. She’d need more time, too, since her hands weren’t as steady as they used to be.

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#Hopefully the read more link works on mobile this time #anyways #gail goffrey #terrarium lights #the santa juliana files #inklingschallenge #inklings challenge 2023 #team lewis #genre: portal fantasy #theme: burial #theme: visiting the sick #story: finished #ocs #original story #scribe does inklings #salt and light #first draft

[dk-thrive]

We cannot stop all the destruction, but we can light candles for one another.

The mornings are dark, the late afternoons are dusky, and before we finish making dinner, the daylight is gone. As we approach the darkest days of the year, we’re confronted with the darkness of wars, a dysfunctional government, fentanyl deaths, mass shootings and reports of refugees crawling through the Darién Gap or floundering in small boats in the Mediterranean. And we cannot avoid the tragedy of climate change with its droughts, floods, fires and hurricanes. Indeed, the world is pummeled with misfortune.

We can count ourselves lucky if we do not live in a war zone or a place without food or drinking water, but we read the news. We see the disasters on our screens. Ukraine, Israel and Gaza are all inside us. If we are empathic and awake, we share the pain of all the world’s tragedies in our bodies and in our souls. We cannot and should not try to block out those feelings of pain. When we try, we are kept from feeling much of anything, even love and joy. We cannot deny reality, but we can control how much we take in.

I am in the last decades of life and sometimes I feel that my country and our species are also nearing end times. The despair I feel about the world would ruin me if I did not know how to find light. Whatever is happening in the world, whatever is happening in our personal lives, we can find light.

This time of year, we must look for it. I am up for sunrise and outside for sunset. I watch the moon rise and traverse the sky. I light candles early in the evening and sit by the fire to read. And I walk outside under the blue-silver sky of the Nebraska winter. If there is snow, it sparkles, sometimes like a blanket of diamonds, other times reflecting the orange and lavender glow of a winter sunset.

We can watch the birds. Recently it was the two flickers at my suet feeder with the yellow undersides of their wings flashing, the male so redheaded and protective, the female so hungry. Today it may be the juncos, hopping about our driveway, looking for seeds. The birds are always nearby. Their calls are temple bells reminding me to be grateful.

For other kinds of light, we can turn to our friends and family. Nothing feels more like sunlight than walking into a room full of people who are happy to see me. I think of my son and daughter-in-law on my birthday, Zeke making homemade ravioli and Jamie baking an apple cake, their shining eyes radiating love. Or of my friends, sitting outdoors around a campfire in our coats and hats, reciting poetry and singing songs.

We also have the light of young children. My own grandchildren are far away, but I spend time with 9-year-old Kadija. My husband and I are sponsoring her family; they arrived here from Afghanistan, with only the father speaking English, only a few months ago. Already, she can bring me a picture book and read “whale,” “porpoise” and “squid” in a voice that reminds me of sleigh bells. I know someday she will be a surgeon, or perhaps a poet.

In our darkest moments, art creates a shaft of light. There is light in a poetry book by Joy Harjo, a recording by Yo-Yo Ma and in a collection of Monet’s paintings of snow.

The rituals of spiritual life will also illuminate our days. In my case, it is sun salutations, morning prayers, meditation and readings from Thich Nhat Hanh, the Vietnamese Buddhist monk and influential Zen master. Also, it’s the saying of grace and the moments when I slow down and am present. Whatever our rituals, they allow us to hold on through the darkness until the light returns.

Finally, we will always have the light of memory. When I recall my grandmother’s face as she read to me from “Black Beauty” or held my hand in church, I can calm down and feel happy. I feel the light on my skin when I remember my mother at the wheel of her Oldsmobile, her black doctor’s bag beside her. Driving home from a house call, she would tell me stories from her life on a ranch in the Great Depression and during the Dust Bowl.

Deep inside us are the memories of all the people we’ve ever loved. A favorite teacher, a first boyfriend, a best friend from high school or a kind aunt or uncle. And when I think of my people, I’m suffused with light that reminds me that I have had such fine people in my life and that they are still with me now and coming back to help me through hard times.

Every day I remind myself that all over the world most people want peace. They want a safe place for their families, and they want to be good and do good. The world is filled with helpers. It is only the great darkness of this moment that can make it hard to see them.

No matter how dark the days, we can find light in our own hearts, and we can be one another’s light. We can beam light out to everyone we meet. We can let others know we are present for them, that we will try to understand. We cannot stop all the destruction, but we can light candles for one another.

— Dr. Mary Pipher, from “Finding Light in Winter” (NY Times, December 11, 2023). Dr. is a clinical psychologist and writer in Lincoln, Neb., and the author, most recently, of “A Life in Light: Meditations on Impermanence.”

#Mary Pipher #light #war #mental health #art #children #peace #calm #nature #politics #ukraine #hamas #palestine #israel #hate #racism #candles

[vellaphoria]

@marirah, thanks for tagging me!!

Rules: Go to your published works on AO3 and list the first fic you ever published there, the last fic you published, any fic that you wrote for a fandom/ship only once, your favorite fic you wrote in the fandom/ship that has the most works, the fic you wish more people read, the fic you agonized over the most, the fic that sprang fully formed from your mind without any effort, and a work you are proud of—for whatever reason. <3

Most recent published fic: daylight is not what we came all this way for (teen, dicktim) I always enjoy a good nightwing!tim fic <3 Fandom I only wrote for once: Unto Your Enemy (Mature, for physical, emotional, and psychological abuse; Silvergifting) For the Silmarillion/broader Legendarium fandom the sheer amount of research and cross-checking things from the Legendarium that I did for this was *a lot.* Like, I read laws and customs of the eldar way too many times to double-check that my interpretation of elf marriage at least had some basis in canon. And there are still probably things unintentionally inaccurate about it. I maybe also wrote this when I was supposed to be writing my undergrad thesis lol Favorite fic written in most common fandom: Recursion

(M for mild nsfw content, dicktim)

Recursion, my beloved. I had so much fun writing this, but it was an absolute mess figuring out all the ripple effects from who knew what, when, and why. I enjoy this one so much that there's an epilogue in the works somewhere on my computer that may even see the light someday lol.

Also a contender for the "fic I'm proud of" category because it just recently broke one thousand kudos on ao3 \o/

Fic I wish more people would read: Afterimage

(T for trauma lol, dicktim)

Cyberpunk-ish au where Tim died but was preserved as a digital ghost in Dick's brain; aka an Incredibly Specific premise that I suspect most people in this fandom aren't into. But I'm into it and that's what matters :D

Ends on a hopeful note because I'm incapable of writing 100% bleak endings lol

Fic I agonized over the most: Deadfall (M for violence, Lazarus!Tim, gen except for Ra's hitting on Tim because he thinks it's funny) You have no idea how many times I've rewritten this one. Neither do I, because I've lost count. It's currently more or less on hiatus because I'm working through some plot snags that I haven't had the spoons to tackle lol Fic that sprang fully formed into my mind: Red in Tooth and Claw

(M for incredibly unhealthy relationship dynamics, dicktim) The first chapter, anyway. I wrote it in a 2am haze after learning about DC vs. Vampires #6 lol A fic that I'm proud of: Midnight Elegy

(E, dicktim)

I'm really happy with how the dynamic between Dick and Tim turned out in this one. Plus, angsty drunk sex is a favorite trope combination of mine <3

#jagn answers #jagn writes #tag games #dicktim

[runwithwolvcs]

Right Where You Left Me

Out of the Woods

School sucks. Somedays, I feel like I can conquer anything. I feel like the smartest person in every room I walk into, a never ending fountain of knowledge. But others, the mere thought of hearing my name being called out in front of my peers made me want to run for the hills. Today was one of those days.

“Paul,” I rushed to him, only stopping when I was mere inches away from him. His body heat radiating onto me like a furnace. The comfort it provided though, was immeasurable. He looked up from his phone, placing it down in his locker before wrapping one arm around my shoulders. He pulled me in and all my worries faded away as I sighed in contentment. 

“Hey, beautiful.” He greeted me before pecking my lips. I barely registered the intimate greeting and kiss. Only one thing is on my mind.

“Did you do the readings?” I ask, the feeling of panic rising again. 

He shifted his body, keeping me tucked into his side protectively as he continued to switch out his books for the afternoon, “When have I ever done the readings?”

“Paul,” I whine, “Clove told Tessa Mr.Faire is cold calling for participation marks today, and I didn’t have time to do the readings,”

“You’re talking to Tessa again?” One thing about Paul that I’ve always loved was that he was a great listener, at least when it doesnt involve school work.. Not the type of guy who looks like their listening but really they are eye-fucking you, but really listening. 

I had ranted to him one night about Tessa, and how we had a falling out because she refused to believe that the pack wasn’t a gang. She had said that I was a bad friend, as if she hadn’t shut me out because of a silly rumour.

Paul wasn’t exactly happy with Tessa now, though I think it may have to do more with the fact that she was the one that had set me up with Gage.

I pinched his side gently and he looked down at me amused. He knows he’s off topic, and I don’t answer his question, “Mr. Faire hates me. I’m going to look like a fool, again.”

“It’ll be fine, Sask.” Paul reassures me.

“We should skip.” I state. I know I shouldn’t ask him to skip with me, he skips enough as it is but it would be nice to see each other in the daylight that doesn’t involve schoolwork. Work on that friendship of ours.

“You have puppy eyes.” He noted before turning to close his locker, sans bookbag. He leaned against it, pulling me with him so I was leaning against him with his fingers hooked into the belt loops of my jeans.

“Woof.” I joked, putting my hands up to the top of my head, mimicking dog ears.

He grins, asking, “What do you suggest we do instead?”

That’s how I found myself perched on Paul's lap in the back of his old truck, lips and teeth clashing in a fight for dominance. I didn’t care to have control, that was his thing and he was damn good at it. What I got off on was making him work for it, the grunts of frustration as I held his wrists away from my body or the slight whine he’d make when I forced his lips away from my neck just as a red splotch began to form so that I could pull his bottom lip between my teeth. He particularly liked when I sucked on it though, given by the guttural moan he produced.

My hand pressed against the foggy window for balance as the two of us pulled away from each other momentarily, the sounds of our ragged breath and lull of the low radio filling the silence in the truck.

“Please,” I whispered before pushing my lips against his again, my hips involuntarily shifting downwards in search of some friction. Paul was still refusing to go below the belt, the most action that he’s given me was his hand under my shirt, over the bra. It was unlike him to say the least and I was growing needy. I needed a release that wasn’t brought on by my own hand, it wasn’t enough.

Paul shook his head with a sharp breath, “Not yet.”

I groan, leaning forward and resting my forehead on his shoulder, “I’m going to combust.”

“Stay over tonight,” his hand grazing up and down my spine, “We can watch a movie and I’ll make it up to you.”

“It’s Friday.” I point out. Delta's night for undivided attention.

“My shift ends at midnight. Delta will be sick of you by then.” He teased me.

I scoffed lightheartedly before asking curiously, “What’s your definition of making it up to me?”

Paul smirked, “Well I was thinking it would start with your head on a pillow and mine between--”

The sound of a phone ringing interrupted his thought, and what a wonderful direction he was heading in. The ringtone signalling that it was in fact, my phone.

Its always my fucking phone.

“Sorry,” I mutter as I pick it up from the seat. Delta written in bold letters across the screen as I quickly answered it. 

“You’re supposed to be in class,” I snipped at her, noting that we had twenty more minutes before the bell.

“I don’t feel well.” Her voice was soft and airy, a stark difference from her outgoing personality.

“Like sick sick, or you just want to go home?” I asked worriedly, shifting off Paul's lap and onto the seat beside him. His hand squeezed my thigh comfortably. 

“I want to go home,” Delta mumbled into the phone and I let out a sigh of relief. Taking care of a sick kid was not something I knew how to handle, at least not on my own. Knowing my dad was working in Port Angeles for the weekend, the responsibility would have been left to me.

“Okay, um, when the bell rings, come to the parking lot okay?” I tell her, trying not to laugh as Paul straightened himself out before combing his fingers through my wild hair, caused by him, of course.

“‘Kay, love you, Sassy.” she chimed, and I rolled my eyes at the childhood nickname she had given me as a toddler.

“Love you too, Del.” I say before hanging up, looking at Paul, and telling him, “We’ll walk.”

“Not a chance, Sassy,” He teased, causing me to scowl.

“You have Spanish next, you need to go.” I point out, he was no longer failing but it was contingent on him actually showing up.

“Can’t.” He said, a lopsided smile forming on his face, “My friend, who is also the most important person to me in this universe, her little sister is sick, so I have to make sure they both get home alright.”

My face heats at his explanation and it feels like a million little butterflies have just taken flight in my belly. Never in my wildest dreams would I have ever thought that he would tell me I was the most important person to him, let alone in the universe.

“It’s a ten minute walk and she’s not actually sick.” I point out, though the smile on my face shows that I’m not exactly arguing against him driving us back home.

“Sorry, babe.” Paul pressed a kiss to my lips, “Imprint over Spanish class any day of the week.”

“Imprint, soulmate, friend,” I list off the things we have labelled ourselves with over the past few weeks before adding quietly, “Lover?”

He rubs his nose against mine, our lips barely touching, “Did I create a nymphomaniac?”

A breathy laugh leaves my lips, “Does it feel different for you now, too?”

“Like a fire that only your touch can put out,” Paul mumbles before pulling the trigger and pressing his lips to mine again feverishly. I thread my fingers into his hair, guiding him over top of me as I lay back on the seat, the feeling of his body weight pressing against me eliciting a  moan from my lips to his. I ache to touch him. All of him.

The bell rings and I can’t help the groan that leaves my throat, “Ruined by the bell, as always.”

---

My sister and I were both absorbers, we got that from our mom. Any new piece of information we learned could cause a domino effect of seeking out more knowledge in any given subject.

Science was Delta's main curiosity, specifically biology. I never thought I’d see the day where she would not want to learn a new topic, but here we are.

They were learning about genealogy and had to create, from what they knew, a family tree. She wasn’t a fan of the assignment and well, simply put, she missed mom. I’ve never liked to see my sister cry, but seeing her cry over something that I can’t fix is a terrible feeling. So, I offered to finish the assignment for her. Out of sight, out of mind.

“Mr. Waters said the Northern Lights would be viewable tonight.” Delta said, poking at her food, “Said to tell you.”

I hummed in acknowledgment, “Yeah? Maybe Orion’s Belt will be too.”

She perked up at my response, adding,“He also said that. And the Milky Way.”

The Milky Way was our mom's favourite thing to see when it came to astronomy. The mythological history behind the galaxy was never the full story she associated the stars with. She often said there is no use crying over spilled milk, sometimes accidents have a way of creating something wonderful. Like a billion stars held together by gravity, lighting up the midnight skies. 

I smile to myself at the thought that I have created my own Milky Way.

I am the stars, and Paul is my gravity. Holding me together with the promise of never letting me fall apart into the black abyss that is this universe.

“We should go.” Delta announced, placing her cutlery on her plate to show that she was finished eating.

“Go where?” I ask with a raised eyebrow. It was nearing nine oclock, and technically her curfew was ten on Fridays, though it’s not like our dad was here to reprimand her.

“The cliffs. That's a good place to see them, right?”

“It is.” I agree, before standing up and grabbing both of our plates. “Maybe next time.”

“But it's Friday!” Delta argues as she follows me to the sink, where I begin to scrap our food into the compost.

I shake my head, reminding her, “And you came home sick, remember?”

“Mom would take me just like she used to take you,” I hear Delta sulk as she quickly leaves my line of sight and into the living room.

My eyes widened at her words, she was right. I know she is. Our mom used to let me stay up late on a school night with her and point out the constellations. She even used to take me to First Beach where there was less light pollution. That was before she had gotten sick. After her diagnosis, the swing bed on the back porch was reserved for stargazing and hot chocolates.

I knew sooner or later she would guilt me or dad with the dead mom card, but eight months after her death? It stung a lot.

“Fine!” I shout from the other side of the kitchen, fighting the urge to toss the plate in my hands. Taking a deep breath, I put it in the sink.  Rounding the corner into the living room where Delta stood. A pout still on her lips as I put my hands on my hips,  “Grab your jacket.”

---

The trip to the cliffs was a bust. The sky had been clear of any clouds when we had left the house, keeping our spirits high, but as we made it to the top of the cliffs too many clouds had rolled in to even see a single star. The downfall of living in the rainiest part of Washington.

My phone had died on the way back, and if I hadn't known at least one wolf, if not mine, was patrolling the area, I would have let the paranoia of my nightmares fuel my quick pace home.

Plugging in my phone was the first thing I did once I stepped inside, telling Delta she needs to go to bed, or at least pretend to be asleep in case our father calls to ask how she is. Though he wasn’t concerned enough to come home early when I texted him to let him know I was pulling her out of school for not feeling well. My phone chimes as it turns back on, two texts from Paul, ‘meet me at mine.’

Followed by, ‘we need to talk.’

“Fuck,” I whisper to myself.  Sent fifty-eight minutes ago. I quickly changed into cotton shorts and a tank top. Although the air was still cold in the early months of spring, I’ve become quite prone to overheating when I sleep in the same bed as him. I quickly open my window, and notice his is already open.

“Bathroom,” Paul called out as I entered through the window. “I sent that text an hour ago,” His voice was harsh and not at all what I was expecting as I entered his bathroom. His mood was a complete 180 from when I last spoke to him.

“I was just waiting for Delta to fall asleep…” I tell him a little white lie, knowing if I told him that my phone had died his anger would only worsen. Rightly so, even I could admit that.

“I told you to stay out of the woods without me,” his voice strained, like he was trying really hard to keep his composure. I kept my distance from him as best I could in the small bathroom.

“I know, but--”

“Fuck, Saskia!” he bursts, “Do you not listen when I tell you what’s going on?!”

“You don’t tell me about anything that you do, “ I say harshly, “and lower your voice before your dad hears you.”

“He’s not home.” He mutters before turning away from me. I watched the bronze boy warily, something was off with him and I don’t think it's all due to the fact that I took Delta into the woods to look at the stars.

Paul leans over the sink, biceps and forearms taut, veins prominent under his skin. I rub my palm over his back. “What’s wrong, Paul?”

“I called my mom..It’s her birthday.”

“Oh?” I questioned. He never talks about his mom. All I know is that when he moved next door from Tacoma when we were eight, his mom didn’t come with. I knew divorce was the reason for the move, but the severity of it was unknown to my knowledge. 

“I haven’t spoken to her in months, she didn’t even call on my fucking birthday. She called a week later and you know what she said to me today, ‘I can’t talk right now, I’m out with family..’”

I cringe at the words his mother told him as he continues ranting. Clenching my hands at my side as the bond between us pulls at my heartstrings. 

“I’m her fucking family, her only goddamn son and she won’t even talk to me.” Paul spits angrily, a small tremor running through his entire body. He gripped the counter tightly, knuckles turning white, in an attempt to ground himself and not lose control.

“I wish she was fucking dead!” Paul shouts and I can’t help but flinch, not from his volume, but his words, “At least then I’d know why she doesn’t answer my calls or texts...”

My vision blurs at his outburst and I take a step back, mumbling quietly, “You don’t mean that…”

I would give anything to have my mom back, to tell her about my days while sitting on the porch swing with tea’s keeping our hands warm. Sharing a blanket she no doubt made while Delta and I were at school. To tell her about Paul, and the complicated entanglement we have found ourselves in.

But she's gone, and she's never coming back. Paul wishing death upon his mother was not something he needed on his conscience, no matter the amount of pain he was in.

“I do.” He growls out, his body trembling again. But it's not an angry tremble, it's one that I recognize all too well.

I rush forward, wrapping my arms around his neck tightly, and his arms circle my waist, holding me just as tight. The first sob leaves his lips and my heart aches for him. “It’s okay, Paul.” I shush into his ear, palms smoothing over the thick muscles of his back.

He starts to crumble, knees bending and hitting the cabinet doors, back bowing, shoulders turning inwards. I fall into him, gently guiding him to the wall. “Please don’t leave me,” he heaves. “Everyone leaves. When we graduate, you're gonna--.”

Kneeling between his legs, I hold the sides of his face between my palms. “Look at me, Paul. Look at me.” I force his gaze upwards by shaking his head. “I’m here, I’m right here. I’m always going to be here for you, no matter what.”

“My mom left me…” He whispers, fresh tears falling down his face.

“I know she did.”

“I-I couldn’t handle it if you left me-me.” he stuttered, looking at me with sad, red eyes, glistening with tears.

“Shh, shh,” I pulled his face into my upper chest, fingers curling into his hair. “I’m not going anywhere.”

“Your mom didn’t leave because of you, okay?” I reassure him, “You just got caught in the middle..”

Paul scoffs, the pain he was feeling turning to anger, “She doesn’t even try anymore.”

“Then she doesn't deserve your attention. If your mom wants to let what happened between your dad and her blind her from seeing what an amazing son she has, that's her problem and I know damn well she will regret it.” I hold his cheeks, forcing him to look me in the eyes. I’ll be damned if he is going to think that he is not worth staying for.“Your dad loves you so much, and I know he’s gotta be so proud of you and everything you’re doing for the tribe. He’s not going anywhere, the packs not going anywhere, and neither am I. You have so many people who love you, and want to be in your life. There's no need to focus on the ones who aren’t making the effort they should be.”

Wiping the last few tears off of his soft skin as he nodded. I give him a small, teasing smile, “Now, you need to shower, you smell like dirt and rain more than usual.”

A small chuckle escaped his lips before he asked, “Shower with me?”

I watch him stand, pulling the shirt from over his head and then slide out of the jean cutoffs. Standing in front of me completely naked, it's weird how comfortable this all feels. Normally when we are naked in front of each other, we’d roll around in his bed for a few hours. But this is an intimacy I’ve never felt with anyone, let alone Paul. I sort of like it. 

“Okay,” I agreed, pulling my shirt over my head, and peeled myself out of my jeans. I know he keeps spare wash clothes in a small bin under the sink from the many nights spent in his sheets, so I grab one and join him in the shower. 

“Thank you,” he whispers, the water pelting his back.

“There’s no need to thank me.” I take the bottle of body wash from his hand, and pour a little onto the cloth and start by scrubbing across his chest, down over his stomach and sides. I ring out the washcloth, clearing off the suds and then scrub his back. I move to his arms and neck. Paul stops me for a second, cupping my face before planting several soft kisses to my lips. 

Stretching my arms up to lather his hair with shampoo I had poured into my palm as he bent his head forward, giving me better reach. I take my time massaging the suds into his scalp, though the feeling of his fingertips lingering on my outer thighs was making it hard to concentrate. I quickly rinse it out and then repeat the process again with his conditioner.

Once I’ve finished, he switches our positions. 

He uses his own products in my hair, and I don’t complain. The feeling of his fingers in my hair providing nothing but bliss.

Watching as he lathered his hands with the body wash in front of me, inhaling the scent deeply, bourbon and maple. “Now I’m really going to smell like you.”

“Good.” he murmured, smoothing his hands over my bronze skin. Gentle, yet firm as he pressed his fingers into the knots in my shoulders. A quiet moan leaving my lips as I shut my eyes and let him work.

“I’m sorry, for what I said..'' Paul mentioned gently, running his soapy hands across my abdomen and along the curve of my breasts. I revelled in the feeling. The feeling of being taken care of, rather than always being the caregiver. 

Leaning back against his chest, I looked up at him, “Don’t be. You were upset.”

Paul caressed my bottom lip with his thumb gently, his eyebrows furrowed as an emotion that I can’t quite decipher crossed his sharp features, “Stay the night.”

I simply nod. 

There was no way I was making it through the night without him, I could practically feel the paranoia already setting in. I also couldn’t fathom leaving him, no after his show of emotions.  I’ve never seen Paul like that, and I would prefer never to see it again. 

--

“Why?” Paul asked,

breaking the comfortable silence. His head was tucked in the crook of my neck with an arm draped over my torso, keeping me flush against him. I could feel the little, petal kisses he was placing on my bare shoulder, only a thin, cotton tank top separating our skin from touching.

“Hm?” I hummed, playing with his growing hair at the nape of his neck. I had noticed he had let it get a bit shaggier after I had mentioned in the woods how I liked it long. Though I doubt he would let it get any longer than it was now. 

Paul asked the question that had been looming all night, “Why would you take your sister into the woods at night?”

“She wanted to see Orion's Belts, her teacher told her to tell me it would be viewable and, well, she wanted to go.” I explained with a shaky breath,  “Delta told me our mom would have taken her, and I-I just, I couldn’t say no because I knew she was right.” My eyes started welling up at the guilt eating at me for the stress I caused him, “I’m sorry.”

Paul wraps his arms around me with a tight hold. No doubt in my mind that he could sense the underlying agony I was in, but couldn’t verbalise. “It’s okay,” He rubs my back soothingly while quietly shushing me. Another sob shakes my body. “Deep breaths, Sask.” 

“I’ll tell you next time..I.. You can come too..” I breathed out, wiping the tears from my cheeks.

“I’d be honoured to look at the stars with La Push’s greatest astronomer.” Paul teased, carding his fingers through my wet hair before leaving his hand to rest on my collar bone, his pointer finger tracing it softly.

I pressed a small kiss to the centre of his chest, “Go to sleep, jerk.”

His grip on my hip tightened at the gesture before Paul mumbled tiredly, “Wake me if you have a nightmare…”

I nodded in acknowledgement, but no matter how hard I tried, sleep was lost to me. Paul's warmth blanketed me like a safety net and I knew in his arms a nightmare was not likely to occur. The worry I felt for him was what kept me awake, listening to the even sounds of his breath and brushing my fingers over his skin. I promised to never leave him, and I intend to keep that promise. Telling myself the nightmares that plagued my mind weren’t real and there was no pale faced redhead with glowing red eyes waiting in the shadows to make her move. There can’t be.

#paul lahote imagine #paul lahote fanfic #paul lahote #paul lahote x oc #twilight wolf pack #twilight wolves #twilight

[gritsandbrits]

Thinking about my Narnia OCs. Spoilers for Narnia, the last battle

Octavia loves to solve mysteries but the one mystery she refuses yo touch is the one about Aunt Girdy. Cold, aloof, possibly bakes children in her oven Aunt Girdy. Rarely seen at family outings and when there is one it's a funeral.

When Octavia's parents drop her off to spend the weekend with the old bat, Octavia thinks it must be divine punishment for forgetting to thaw the turkey last week. While Girdy proves to not bake children in ovens, she has proven to be cold and strict.

That night Octavia sneaks into the attic and finds a box full of trinkets. She uncovers some interesting things: a dagger, an arrow broken at the tip. A vintage tin of Turkish Delights - the hell are Turkish Delights, Octavia asks herself - and an old b&w photo of a young woman with a young (white) man.

Octavia hears some noises and is about to leave but suddenly she finds herself outside in the middle of broad daylight when it's supposed to be nighttime. The grass a brighter shade of green brighter than humanly possible, the sky azure blue, musty odor replaced by frangipanni. And more unnerving Octavia realizes there is no door for her to return to.

On the other side Girdy wakes up and see that Octavia isn't in bed. She panics, she hate the police and doesn't want them at her house but doesn't want to get charged either. In the eye of tve hurrcane she spots thw attic door open and heads inside she finds evidence of Octavia messing in her trunk. At first Girdy is angry but it dawns on her she may have travelled to the place Girdy herself once visited-Narnia. Suddenly Girdy is digging around in books and the boxy clunker of a computer to find ways of travelling worlds. And then she spits another clue: the book Octavia brought with her to read was written by a Susan Pevensie.

Octavia is taken to the court of the Summer King, Salamann. He beguiles her with tales of the narnian race, of the defeat of the winter witch at the hands of the Four Kings and Queens. He talks of the Last Battle, and of the missing Flower Queen Gertrude. Octavia says she has an aunt named Gertrude but she isn't fit to be queen, more like a tyrant. Salamann tells her that in his domain fun is free and nobody has to work. Well almost nobody, he puts criminals to work as punishment. He plans to expand his world of fun to all Narnia, perhaps someday he might even cheer up the real world too. Salamann believes that the prophesied return of the Flower Queen, he could have the power to make things right.

It turns out Salamann's plan for a peaceful world is causing suffering. On his whims to built amusements he disrupts important monuments and nesting places for the animals and creatures. He puts "unfunny people" to work as punishment. In reality the unfunny people are political dissidents and critics, or people just having a bad day. Soon Octavia learns the truth from a young mouse whose home was destroyed by the construction of Salamann's park. She says in order to stop him they must find the Four Kings and Queens, who are currently in hiding.

Girdy is desperate to find Octavia but nothing she does works. Finally she brings herself to read Susan Penvensie's book.

In Girdy's youth she had lived with the old man, when four English children move in. Girdy was a shy girl, partly due to the bullying she experienced as a mixed race girl. She suspected the Pevensie kids to be tbe same to her relief they aren't. She accompanied them to Narnia, and learning of her powers over plants and nature, became the Flower Queen. As she got older she lost her ability to travel to narnia but never lost her penchant for plants. When the war was over, she and Peter - whom developed a romance with - decided to get married. Getrude had wanted to open a flower shop.

Gertrude was visiting family in Canada when she found out that the Pevensies as well as several of their extended family passed in a train accident. Susan wasnt there, making her the only survivor. In the aftermath, and with her dreams of a happy life shattered Girdy became bitter and lost contact with Susan. They hadn't spoken in years. But Girdy did keep a lot of things to remember them by. It was all she had.

Wait Susan can help her! Girdy finds the number and calls her expecting and answer. An unfamiliar voice answers and it is one of Susan's kids. They tell her that Susan passed away a few years ago. Before her death she wrote a book based on her experiences in Narnia. At this new info Girdy becomes ashamed. How had she been so foolish? To let so many years go by without a single hello or how are you? It was too late for reconciliation. All she could hope now is for Octavia to make it through.

Octavia journeys through the land avoiding Salamann's forces and befriending narnians along the way. Girdy continues to read Susan's book and feels a weight lifting off her, she goes back to the attic and uncovers the dagger the arrow the tin of turkish delights everything she kept of her friends. Now she truly cherished them. It was all she had.

Once she steps out again she finds herself on the same meadow of frangipanni, the sweet summer breeze in her now imperfect coils. The frangipanni whisper to her of the young girl and the soldiers in red and orange and gold. Of the king who rule the domain with dreams and eternal laughter.

Girdy hears it all and asks the frangipanni which direction she needs to take. She and Octavia eventually reunite but they are caught by Salamann, who asks Octavia why have she left their game. Girdy attempts to shield her niece but what can an old woman do? Suddenly an arrow comes their away distracting Salamann enough for the heroes to get away. A mystery figure guides them away, through a hidden pathway until they reach a boat. One the boat the figure unveils their hood - a servant of Caspian. Girdy reveals she once visited Narnia but told no one in their family. Having met Caspian before she trusts his servant to bring them to safety.

As Octavia learns more of her family history, Girdy and Susan have a long overdue conversation. Girdy apologizes for not talking to Susan while she was alive, that she did keep her letters but afraid to write back. Susan replies she also was too anxious to write anything back and was sidetracked by her boo and personal life. But even all this time never lost hope that Girdy would find her happiness again. Girdy and Peter meet again, Girdy is still an old woman at this point, she hasn't fully regain her joy but Peter tells her he still loves her no matter what. He had been disappointed that she seemed to forget about him and his siblings but promise to help her break free of her demons.

Caspian's Servant takes Octavia and Girdy to a castle ground far away from Salamann's cluthes. There in all their sparkling glory are the Four Kings and Queens. To Octavia's surprise one of them is her favorite author - Susan Pevensie!

Susan reveals that after she died she was reborn into her queen form, to finally rejoin her siblings. Octavia says her aunt has been to Narnia before, She mentions Salamaan spoke of the Flower Queen having the same name. The royals reveal that Gertrude IS the Flower Queen. Octavia is shocked but Girdy admits they are telling the truth. She tells Octavia that in their world Peter was her childhood sweetheart and that they had planned to marry after the war. When she lost him & their family, she lost a part of her soul. Only until Girdy regains her spark she can use her powers. Realizing all this makes Octavia feel guilty for judging her own aunt. She had no idea that underneath all that coldhearted resentment, was very deep pain.

At the end, Girdy and Octavia returns to the human world, the older lady having finally accepted that she can live again. Peter promises he'll wait for her like always. Edward gifts Octavia a tin of turkish delights. Susan gives Octavia her blessing to continue the chronicles.

Salamann plans to use Girdy's magic to rid the world of all sorrow and pain. He had seen portraits of her and fell in love. But he needs all elements: he already has water, ice and of course his own fire magic. He needed earth, spring. In a night he ambushes the royal place and kidnaps her. Salamann tries to seduce Girdy but she refuses. While the idea of changing her past seems tempting she didn't want to destroy her beloved Narnia or the real world to do it.

Octavia, The Four Kings and Queens and their allies launch a rescue operation; on the battle Girdy reclaims her joy and her power. Girdy reminds Salamann that pain and sorrow are just as valid as happiness and joy and to run away from negative emotions is just as bas as letting them consume you. Salamann doesn't listen and in a jealous rage tries to kill Peter. Girdy summons a spell and Salamann is swallowed into the earth, never to be seen again.

The story ends with Octavia and Girdy not even being gone that whole weekend, just as Octavia's parents arrive to pick her up. They're shocked to see Girdy in a better mood. They never seen her so...joyful. Perhaps she's thankful to get the brat put of her hair bur she tells them Octavia has been a good girl and open to visit her anytime. A week later Girdy and Octavia go to an ice cream shop in town to talk about Octavia's Susan Pevensie collection.

#narnia #narnia oc #peter pevensie x oc #oc x canon #the chronicles of narnia

[pangolin-404]

hey ...... the wip snippet . i know i already requested one but what if i did another. imagine

Ultrakill | The Kamen Rider Crossover Nobody Asked For <- this one :3

[ask game] :3 woag

ohhh hhough this one . skeleton in my closet that rattles at me menacingly from time to time. there is a high likelihood this one will either never see written completion in a way I see fit, or I will try to draw something for it, because this is one of those ideas that is just. lurking in the back of my brain always but it's never a full beginning-middle-end plot. I think it deserves to be Seen, Eventually

very very little is written in the actual doc and what is written is probably going to be deleted and rewritten. need to find a balance between worldbuilding and actual story because it's from Gabriel's POV and that has weird holier-than-thou bureaucracy. BUT the jist is:

the Council serves as a very powerful organization that carefully picks and chooses who can be a Kamen Rider. it is treated as a highly esteemed position, and Gabriel is expected to never leave his Rider form (though it can exhaust him because they're. not convenient in daily life,) and always be ready to get sent out to deal with crime or patrolling. his identity is stripped from him, and he is not considered a person beyond a Kamen Rider, a vigilante-ish figure who does what he's told without question, a weapon.

V1 and V2 are artificial Kamen Riders built to surpass the power of the Council. I haven't fully settled on who made them, likely human scientists (could add a healthy flavor of robot-war-is-threatening-to-happen in this setting here). V1 is an escapee that was meant to be scrapped because it could not be controlled, and springs around causing mayhem. V2 was either released to destroy V1, or escaped also, although for budding-self-awareness reasons and not kill-all-humans reasons. V2 here is a lot pettier than canon V2 because its predecessor is pretty openly running around and it has self-esteem issues because instead of being too murderous, it's not murderous enough.

Gabriel is sent to destroy the weird threat skittering around, attacking not just humans and Council staff ("angels" are just,, lower-leveled Riders I suppose) but machines that it SHOULD share a common goal with, but it does not care who gets in the way of its bullets. He doesn't realize V1 is a machine and has a crisis about that, and he didn't know V2 existed until it shot in from nowhere to attack V1. overall Gabriel is having a terrible time questioning what it means to be a Kamen Rider etc etc. he has his little gay awakening when V1 beats him in a fight

Mirage is canon. I don't know HOW Mirage would be canon. maybe a hologram or an evil V1 that just. ended up an existential young woman. but she is canon. vital information

I feel like I need to do more tinkering with the setting, what role the prime souls and the ferryman might play, and make a nice and tidy checklist for plotpoints . the kamen rider formula was not built for being written out. this has been in my brain for a year so someday it will be real or else I think I will be cursed

bonus year-old discord WIPs that may or may not be familiar (looking at these is killing me, ). the only reason I am showing these is because the files are now lost so if I ever had to touch the OG comic idea again I'd be doing it from scratch so these might as well see some glimmer of daylight

#thoughts #asks #🥚 #ask game #one of those stories that would appeal to 6 people max #but by god I think it's a good one #kr zero-one save me kr zero-one #the only two series I've watched is ex-aid and most of zero-one so that's where All of my kr knowledge is from

[same-pic-of-the-sun-everyday]

It's been pretty cloudy in my area lately, and I'm sad about it. Not to insult the clouds, they don't control their positions (to my knowledge), but I can't see you! It's just blinding whiteness in the sky and it makes me sad!

Side note, did you know just going outside and seeing the sun does wonders for human mental states?

Burn bright, my daylight, and may we meet someday.

aw im sorry dear mortal, but its good that you cant see me, for i would harm your eyes

i did not know that

i love you

#sun answers #☀️ appreciator anon

[villain-in-love]

Prisoner No.00 aka Zero's playlist:

ALIVE by SkyDxddy feat. LYELL

This ain't just some fairytale your mama read, you woke up the beast Feeding time is here again so sacrifice yourself just for me Answer to the calling of the fallen, let me see if it bleeds Only here to haunt you and exhaust you, can't you see?

...To Be Loved by Papa Roach

I've got another confession I fell to temptation And there is no question There was some connection I've got to follow my heart No matter how far I gotta roll the dice Never look back and never think twice

First Death by TK from Ling tosite sigure

Razor-like, super-dominant, Creepy immortality, invincible and imprisoned Give it to me, avatar of fear, Devil’s barter, I hugged you tighter

Сказка by IC3PEAK

I came from a scary russian fairy tale, I don’t care where you are from I’m not afraid of the daylight, there’s enough darkness anyway The world will give you anything you ask for, and then take it away when you least expect it I’m not playing your games, you’re going to die someday anyway

Power Makes A Queen by HalaCG

I don't care, don't reciprocate Don't compare, won't be fair, I'll make you behave Walk in like a god, no façade, just a rule to break Beyond the top, we don't stop, let the crimson reign

masquerade by siouxxie

Masquerade, Masquerade, Masquerade, Catch your skin right on my fang, Masquerade, Masquerade, Masquerade, Soon you’ll know what is my name Masquerade, Masquerade, Masquerade, Mortal souls is what I crave

Who Is She x The Perfect Girl by I Monster x Mareux (Mashup)

You're such a strange girl I think you come from another world You're such a strange girl I really don't understand a word...

Cannibal by Ke$ha (rapidsongs edit)

I eat boys up, breakfast and lunch Then when I'm thirsty, I drink their blood Carnivore, animal, I am a cannibal I eat boys up, you better run

Black by The Soft Moon

I don't care what you say, you say Living life my own way, own way I don't care what they say, they say Living life my own way, own way...

Hellhound by DeathbyRomy feat. Jazmin Bean

Cynical Sharp teeth, play sweet, I’m a cannibal I feed off flesh like an animal I leave my victims critical

Вендиго by Канцлер Ги

Frosty air slept In the fluffy owl feathers I called out to you in the night And you followed my call While I’m quietly weaving Your footprints into a thread Tonight you may Satisfy my hunger!

Miss Jackson by Panic! At the Disco

Climbing out the back door, didn't leave a mark No one knows it's you, Miss Jackson Found another victim, but no one's gonna find Miss Jackson, Jackson, Jackson

A Little Bit Dangerous by CRMNL

Cold heart, with a smile I'm free, extra wild Locked up, for while now Look at what you made me Look at what you made me - do

P.S. Because the sound is just as important as the lyric, I chose altered versions of some of the songs for this playlist.

P.P.S. Pieces from "Сказка" and "Вендиго" were translated by me. Translation for "First Death" was taken from the internet.

P.P.P.S. Unfortunately, Канцлер Ги (who is one of my favourite musicians of all time, mind you) doesn't make any music videos and doesn't even publish her songs on YouTube, so I picked a fan video because it has the clearest sound. But there's a lot of videos of her performing this song live!

#Let's be real I couldn't not put ke$ha's Cannibal in this playlist. It would have been disrespectful. #And all of that is not counting a couple of instrumentals that have no lyrics at all #Anyways should I make a continuation post with explanations why I chose these songs?.. Because I can. #s/i: no.“00” #self insert #self ship #self shipping