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#incorrect suits
djcanipe99 · 10 months
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Marcus: Which one of you is George o malley,Spencer Reid ,Shawn Spencer,Neal caffery,Andy Dwyer ,Mike Ross jake peralta and Sheldon copper
George,Spencer ,Shawn ,Neal ,Andy mike ,jake and Sheldon : Oh, that's me.
Marcus: Wait a second... is your great grandfather father Indiana Jones
George,Spencer ,Shawn ,Neal ,Andy mike ,jake and Sheldon : nervously)Yes.
Marcus : You poor bastard!
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samthechaotic · 1 month
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Tim: Whenever I face a horrible situation, I ask myself "what would Jason do?" and do the exact opposite.
Damian: For the first, and probably last, time in your life Drake, you're right.
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thatssroughbuddy · 5 months
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he is trying his best
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frownyalfred · 8 months
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what Bruce Wayne had for breakfast: coffee and a smoothie
what Bruce Wayne had for lunch: more coffee
what Bruce Wayne had after someone tried to touch one of his kids: a FELONY
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incorrectbatfam · 5 months
Conversation
Dick, when Bruce first adopted him: He can't tell me what to do. If I want to skateboard, I'll skateboard. If I want to jump on the bed, I'll jump on the bed.
Dick, climbs onto the bed: Oh! Look! I'm jumping on the bed! I'm gonna hurt myself! I'm gonna hurt my—
Dick, falling: Ow! I hurt myself.
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Anthony, to Eloise: Look, could you stop insulting Colin? His life is pathetic enough without you.
Anthony, to Colin: Don’t say I never defend you.
Colin: Can I say you never defend me WELL???
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Happy Easter: Dysfuctional Family
Charlie: (blowing a kazoo through the hotel while wearing white bunny ears and tail, carrying an Easter basket, and throwing bright colored and decorated eggs everywhere)
HAPPY EASTER, EVERYONE!!!
Hazbins: (groan collectively)
Vaggie: (slightly distracted by the tail) Hun, love the enthusiasm, but do you even know the purpose of Easter Sunday is?
Charlie: (cracks open a Cadbury egg and siphons out the innards with her tongue) Isn't it just an excuse to binge on chocolate and snuggle fluffy little bunnies and ducklings?
Angel: (clutches his pearls in ex-Catholic Italian horror) Mama Mia!
Lucifer: *Squeeeeee!* I'll be right back!
Vaggie: I guess that's a more corporate way to put it.
Angel: That's IT!!! I'm making my Mama's Italian Easter Bread! Charlie, you need to be schooled on Easter!
Alastor: Hmmm... I suppose if we're doing a full celebration, I can do a little something to liven things up. (Snaps his fingers, and everyone's clothes are transformed into various colored Bunny footie pajamas)
Charlie: (wearing hot pink bunny jammies and twirls) Oooooh! These are so cuuuute!
Vaggie: (in pastel lavender pajamas and snarling) Cabron!
Angel: (sneaky smirk as he wears a pastel pink and white two-piece pajama suit) Oh, Smiiiiiiles?
Alastor: (simply wearing red bunny ears) No.
Angel: C'mon! Hear me out! (Whispers in Alastor's ear)
Alastor: Hmmmmm.... I'll allow it! (Snaps his fingers again)
Vaggie: (baggy bunny jammies suddenly transform into a black and velvet purple, Las Vegas Showgirl bunny suit with white tail and ears, fishnets, and heels with purple wrist cuffs)
Angel: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! LOOKING GOOD, VAGS!!!!
Vaggie: (growls and tries to cover herself) FUCKING-A, ANGEL!!! WHAT THE HELL DID YOU TELL HIM?!?!?!
Angel: Does it matter? I don't have a soul to sell. (Sees Charlie) Ha! Might wanna focus on your girlfriend, Toots.
Vaggie: What? (Looks at Charlie)
Charlie: (blushing, heart eyes, panting like a puppy, and her pajamas turned into a similar Showgirl suit but red with fox ears and tail)
Vaggie: Ch-Charlie? Charlie! No. No! Charlotte Morningstar, we are in front of guests! Shit! (Runs down the hallway)
Charlie: (hearts explode around her head) Hippity-Hoppity, that ass is my property! (Gives chase)
...........
Vaggie: (rounds back around the corner while carrying Charlie bridal style) Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!
Lucifer: (rides in on a tidal wave of fluff infused rubber duckies while wearing yellow ducky footie pajamas with orange webbed feet) RELEASE THE QUACKEN!!! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Alastor: (sighs in aroace exhaustion as a random rubber duck bounces off his head)
Angel: (slowly calming down as he wipes a tear from his eye) It's just like home~
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zootopiathingz · 2 months
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Charlie: those girls were flirting with you..
Alastor: they were?
Charlie: yes! They were all over you! How could you not notice?
Alastor: Charlie, my darling, you’re the only woman I notice.
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incorrect-dnd-classes · 7 months
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Bard: Don’t be cocky. It doesn't look good. Wizard: [clears throat] Bard: On you. I can pull it off.
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meebles · 1 year
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cody (about obi-wan): unfortunately his beautiful eyes and cunty behavior have captivated me
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gallusrostromegalus · 8 months
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AEIWAM: WHY does Aizen eat mayo on white bread?!!
There's a lot of things wrong with that guy.
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Leo: Mikey, make some ocean noises so I can get to sleep. Mikey: Whoosh. Leo: More like a French beach. Mikey: Le whoosh.
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lisalosingstreak · 2 months
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Eugene: Wednesday, are you sure this will help me get a hot werewolf girlfriend in time for the Rave’n?
Wednesday: Of course Bee-Boy, they go wild for it for some reason. I mean, what’s not to love about it?
Eugene: I’m not sure, Enid said it looked silly.
Wednesday: All I know is that she rips it off me whenever I wear mine.
Eugene: ………..
Wednesday: Just give me your infernal phone Eugene I haven’t got all day.
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Credit to @caitlynskitten who is inspiring these unhinged beekeeping thoughts.
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watchyourbuck · 9 months
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*Buck in a suit prancing around the 118*
Eddie: *seeing him for the first time in a suit* damn
Hen: you good there, Diaz?
Eddie:
Hen:
Eddie:
Eddie: *getting up and running* yeah no I need to tap that ass immediately
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godofstory · 2 months
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incorrectbatfam · 10 months
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Kory: Roy is looking for a six-foot guy.
Dick: Well that’s unrealistic.
Dick: Jason's only got two feet.
Kory:
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