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britswriting · 1 year

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Devotion C.B (1)

Welcome to book 3 of my unbroken series!

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*Leighton's POV*

I thought getting engaged meant you immediately opened Pinterest and started looking at wedding dresses, but it took me almost 2 months to even daydream about it.

The first thing I did was yell at Uncle Garrett for not telling me, Colby and I walking hand in hand back to the car, before I pulled out my phone and FaceTimed Aaliyah, showing her my ring, listening to her gasp then squeal.

"If I'm not your maid of honor bitch I swear!" She declared, making me laugh.

"You'll have to fight Logan for it!"

"Shit" She muttered and I laughed. "Wait! He would totally rock that though! WAIT WHAT IF HE WAS THE FLOWER GIRL" Aaliyah cackled. "Brock, I didn't think you had the balls to do it!" She called out and my eyes widened, bringing my finger to my lips since Gemma was next to me, falling asleep.

The day of my 24th birthday, we all (My dad, mom, aunt, uncle, Melissa, Colby, Gemma and I) went to the Mall of America, back to the rainforest cafe; Gemma losing her mind at all the animals.

"The last time I was here, you were in mommy's belly" I cooed, feeling weird seeing my two and a half year old sit across from me, in the same exact place where I didn't know if it would all work out.

Here I was two years later, engaged, sober and happy... It felt surreal.

The day before we had to head back home, Colby asked if we were going to publicly announce our engagement now that everyone important already knew.

"If you want to, we can, but I don't mind keeping it to ourselves. You're Mr. Social Media. It's your career. You can do whatever you want" I replied, and he sighed. "What?"

"You're important, you do know that, right?" he asked, confusing me. "I want to share you with people. You're a part of this decision"

"I understand, but it's your job. It's your name. If you want to tell your followers I said yes in some cheesy post, go right head, but I don't care"

"You don't care?" He asked and I shrugged, scrolling through my texts with my mom, trying to find a picture she sent, to send to Aaliyah. "Why don't you care?"

"Social media isn't my life Colby"

"I understand... but don't you want to tell people?" He asked, getting me to look at him.

"We did. We told everyone I want to tell. People who watch your ghost hunting videos don't matter to me. They're not in my life, they're not getting invited to the wedding, they're not someone I really think about. I'm not involved in that side of you, and to be frank, I don't want to be. That is your job. That's where you work. If you want to share that with them, that is your choice, it doesn't affect me"

"Leighton, it's more than just where I work. It's everyone knowing we're together. We're getting married. We're starting a life together" he tried to explain, seeming upset, which was confusing me.

"But we've already started a life together long before you proposed?"

"But I never shared that"

"So then why does it matter if you share that we're engaged?"

"Because..." He paused, letting out a deep breath, "Because you're a part of my life I want to share. I don't share because people have too many opinions and think they can control me... but why can't I have what Sam and Kat have? Why can't I post photos of us kissing? Why can't I share fun adventures we do, and show us doing couple like things, without getting yelled at? I want to share the proposal because it means you're staying. You're someone they have to take or leave. I already plan to marry you. Their voices don't matter anymore"

"Colby, if you want to tell people, then tell people"

"But you don't want me to"

"Oh my god! Colby! if you worked an office job, why the fuck would I care if you told your coworkers you were engaged? I'll more than likely never see them in my life. You're asking me if I want to post on social media about a life event they're not a part of? I don't use social media, I don't post on it, I barely type it into Google. Posting about an engagement isn't something that I have a desire to do, but I understand if you do. If you want to post a cheesy photo and say "She said yes" on your Instagram, then do that. Whatever your choice is, does not matter to me"

"I want it to fucking matter, Leighton!" He groaned, his hands covering his face.

I sighed, watching him run his hands over his face.

"Colby, baby, I love you and I support your decision if this is what you want to do. — Are you listening to what I'm saying? I said I don't care if you want to, or not. If you want to share me, us... do that. Do whatever will make you happy, but something as small as an Instagram post should not be controlling your life. I don't know why you're freaking out about this, when you barely use Instagram as it is. What is the real issue here? Why is this such a big deal to you, besides you wanting your fans to know we're getting married?"

"It's not controlling me! I just.. Why can't you care? Why don't you want them to know?"

"Look at me" I demanded, his face still covered by his hands. "Colby, look. at. me."

He removed his hands, his eyes glossed over as he stared at me.

"You are Cole Brock. A boy I met because I needed a place to live, and we just happened to bond and like getting greasy diner food together. You're not Colby Brock, the big YouTuber who has money and fame and followers. I don't give a crap about what your "fans'' have to say about me, or my life, or our relationship. You don't share things because you're insecure of losing people. Why are you so afraid to lose someone who's never supported you to begin with? If you're going to get hated on for falling in love, they didn't deserve you anyway. If posting this post is going to make you happy, post it. I'm not going to see the hate, or lose a wink of sleep over it, and you shouldn't either. If you want to keep it private, do that by all means. If you want to shout from the rooftops that you put a ring on it, fucking do that!" I laughed, seeing a smile crack on his face, a tear rolling down his cheek. "They only get to see what you show. You control how much you let them in, and how much you tell them. If you want the world to know, share it, and if you want it to just be us... that's perfectly fine too"

"I'm sorry" he mumbled, wiping at his cheek, and I leaned down to kiss him softly.

"I love you"

"I love you too, and we don't have to post anything if you don't want to" he said and I groaned.

"Oh my god! Just hit fucking post, will you?"

****

colbybrock: The start of something beautiful

****

Life got busy once we got home, that logistics like "Now what?" never really crossed our minds. Sam and Colby got back into the swing of filming, and I got back into the swing of working, and visiting family and friends, April and Noel coming over here and there to hang out, that our one year anniversary really snuck up on me.

"I don't know what to do for it" I complained to Aaliyah, scrolling through pages of Google links.

"Have you heard from Colby?" She asked, tiredness worn on her face like she was ready to crawl into bed, even though it was currently 2:35pm.

"I mean, we FaceTime, but he's been so busy with work.."

"Ask him. No one says it has to be a surprise. You can plan things together"

"I just.. I hate that every time I try to do something nice for him, I fail. I can never get it to go to plan"

"Babes, that's just your life" She laughed and groaned.

"I know! What did you and River do for your first?"

"Honestly, we don't even know our anniversary. We know the month, and that's it. We sort've just picked a day and rolled with it and we've gotten to the point where we just make dinner and hang out for the night. It doesn't have to be something extreme, Leigh. It can be small simple things"

"But he likes the extreme things"

"Has he seen your bank account before he put a ring on it? He's going to need to like poor man's soup and a movie night cuddle if you two are going through life together"

"Hey!"

She laughed, "Leighton, be real. He doesn't care. He's happy you just said yes"

One way or another she was correct, and Colby flew in on the day of our anniversary, commenting about how weird it was to walk into the apartment and not have a toddler screaming at his feet since she was with Gabe for the next two days.

We stayed in our pajamas all day and hung out in my apartment, ordering in food and reminiscing on all of the things we did before we got together, Colby pulling up old explore videos, mentioning how they thought about doing more things like that, just this time actually getting permission.

"See, I'd be down to go for that. As long as you don't whip an EMF meter out of your ass, I'll go"

"Why do you hate ghosts so much?" he laughed, pausing the video.

"Because I have a hard time believing in the fact that once you die, your soul goes somewhere and can get trapped here, and you're still stuck here. I have a hard time thinking there is more. If I've lived so many past lives, why is my brain still confused?"

"If we're going to stay engaged, we are not walking down that road right now" He laughed and I rolled my eyes, snuggling more into my blanket.

"I understand you have your beliefs and you've seen some unexplainable things, hell, even I have. I still don't know what kinda bullshit that Amanda girl was on, but.. I just.. it's easier to block it out and pretend it didn't happen, then look it in the face. Maybe deep down I just don't want it to be real.. but because I think it's all bullshit, it's not fun going and I'm sure it isn't fun watching me be there. I'm glad you guys are getting to do crazy shit, but mostly I'm glad you have something to do with Sam, without me. I'm glad you guys get to spend time together like that"

The second week of September Colby and I somehow got on the topic of moving in together, and it wasn't like we didn't want to... but it came down to where, when and how.

Where would we move?

When would we move?

and how?

I can't just move us across the country, because Gemma see's Gabe every other weekend, or on weekdays. With our schedules being so crazy right now, I can't imagine possibly finding the time to do that, to which Colby claimed that we just make time.

Sounds easy, right?

"Would you want to move to Nevada?" Colby asked and without thinking twice I shook my head. "Why?"

"Because that's not home to me. I hear Nevada and I think Vegas strip, and that's like bachelor party or vacation time. I don't picture raising a family there"

"Families live there" he chimed back.

"I know, but I want to move more east... I just... I don't want to be away from my family, and asking them to follow me back home is a lot right now. I mean, my mom has all her doctors here. I can't just make it Leighton's world and ask everyone to move for me"

"But you also can't put your life on hold for your mom"

I rolled my eyes, walking down the hall, leaving him in my bedroom.

"Leighton?" He called, his footsteps behind me, his hand grabbing my shoulder. "Please don't"

I groaned, turning around. "I get that I can't put things off.... But I would rather live here, with them, and be able to see my mom whenever I want, then be in Minnesota and get the call that she died. I have literal nightmares about that. So I'm not moving. If you wanna live in Vegas, live in fucking Vegas, but I'm staying here"

"Why is this becoming an argument? Nevada isn't my forever place either"

"I'm not arguing. I apologize if it's coming off like that, it's just... I want you to know that I want to stay here, and why"

"But you shouldn't put what you want off. Your mom could live for 10 more years Leighton"

"And she could die tomorrow. I'm not negotiating and I'm not changing my mind, so can we drop it? If you want to live together, move back here, otherwise, stay where you are" I muttered, continuing my way to the kitchen.

I started cleaning up from breakfast, Gemma having made a mess of my floors and table.

"Leighton"

I mentally groaned, ignoring him as I wiped down the table.

"Leighton"

"What?"

"Can we please talk about this?"

"What is there to talk about? I'm staying here. So clearly, if we're living together, you're moving here. It's not like you hate California"

"That's not the point. You're brushing off an important conversation about us moving in together"

"You're literally here all the time" I motioned to my apartment, moving around Colby who was leaning against the counter.

"Leighton, I love you, but I don't want to live with your brother forever"

Oh.

Shit.

I looked up from the sink, Colby watching me, looking confused and frustrated.

"Leighton? Why are you shutting down on me?" He asked and when I didn't reply, I watched him get up and my heart dropped.

Was he leaving?

I closed my eyes, taking a deep breath, only to feel his hands wrap around my waist, pulling me into him.

"Please don't shut down on me"

"I'm.. not"

I heard him chuckle, and felt his hands on the front of my hips before he had me turn into his chest.

"Why are you getting quiet on me? You only go quiet when you're insecure. It's just a conversation baby"

"I just.. I can't really afford a house mortgage" I admitted, hating how I feel like I'm holding him back.

I watched a smile crack onto his face, turning into a grin.

"What?" I asked, confused why he looked like he was about to make fun of me.

"It's always Leighton against the world, huh?" He teased me.

"What?"

"Why is it that I brought up us moving in together, and your brain went to some expensive house you can't afford? Do you really think I'm going to force you into a situation you're uncomfortable with? I already know you won't let me just buy us a house. We have other options, you know. We could do what you're doing now, but on our own" He said and I felt stupid.

"I'm sorry" I immediately apologized, wishing we could just restart this whole conversation over.

"I love you, you know that?" He laughed, my face becoming warm as I leaned into his chest, groaning.

He held me for a minute as I let my embarrassment rush through my veins, praying we can just pretend my stupidity never happened.

"What about Landon?" I asked, my words muffled against the fabric of his shirt.

"Leighton, he can't expect you to live with you forever? Especially now that we're engaged. Plus, he has friends, a boyfriend, I'm sure he'll figure it out. You need to stop worrying so much about other people"

"Well I'm not going to leave him high and dry!"

"Leigh, you're acting like we're moving out tomorrow with no warning. Do you just not want to live together, is that the problem?" He accused me, and I pushed away from his chest glaring.

"Why the fuck would I say yes if I didn't want to live with you? Do you think we were going to get married and we just continue to live in different states?" I asked, creating distance between us/

"Well you're not talking to me, and bringing up issues that aren't even issues yet! We've been engaged for three months, and we haven't even discussed it"

I took a calming breath, my head starting to feel fuzzy as I tried to pull my thoughts together.

"There are a lot of lives affected if we do that. What about Sam and Kat?" I asked, knowing that if we moved out, we were leaving a lot of people with unexpected changed lives.

"Sam and Kat are perfectly fine if I leave babe" he chuckled, yet again making me feel stupid.

I sat down on the floor, feeling overwhelmed and just wanted to be alone for a minute.

"Babe?" He said and I shook my head. "Leighton?"

I opened my eyes to see Colby sat in front of me.

"Can you please tell me what you're thinking about?" He asked and I groaned.

"It's dumb. I'm dumb. I'm sorry" I immediately spat out, going to stand up, only for Colby to grab my wrist and pull me back down to him.

"You're overwhelmed" he stated, and I just stared. "It's okay to feel overwhelmed, but can we at least talk about it?" He asked and nodded. "What is in your head right now?"

"Things are changing, and fast" I mumbled, feeling extremely pathetic.

He nodded, "They are, and that's not a bad thing"

"But... I finally got comfortable"

"Being comfortable is overrated" he teased, getting me to smile, shaking my head.

"Not when you're poor and stressed. You welcome comfort" I giggled.

"Just because change happens, doesn't mean you're taking steps back. I brought it up because I come back here frequently anyway, plus we're engaged now, and I'd like to start the journey of fully creating a life together. I'm not saying we need to live in a mansion, I'm perfectly fine with us living in an apartment..... I just want to be with you"

It felt nice to be able to sit down and talk about our future, without being told that I'm wrong, or that my insecure feelings are stupid, even when I know I'm overreacting, or taking things out of proportion.

The two of us probably sat on the kitchen floor for an hour, talking about possibly moving into an apartment together and what that would look like, which eventually led to both of us sitting on our phones, looking at listings and just daydreaming a little bit about the idea of actually taking this step together.

"So would you say three bedrooms then?" He asked.

"Well.. we only need two? The more you add, the more expensive it gets"

"Baby, let's just put in our dream things first and go from there"

"But"

"Worry about money later" He stated and I frowned.

"That is a foreign concept, Brock"

October rolled around and we finally set up time to look at apartments, and a few small houses, but Colby immediately said no, not liking the neighborhoods they were in.

By the time we found an apartment we could both agree on, everything started to feel a little too real.

"Is this really happening?" I whispered to him, both of us reading over our renters agreement.

"You know what will be even more real?" He quietly asked.

"Hm?"

"When your signing Brock as your last name"

Oh.

I stayed quiet, pretending to be focused on the contract, signing and dating the few pages.

"I can't believe I'm legally bound to an apartment with you now... and my dad isn't a co-signer" I joked, Colby finishing writing his name down.

"I almost put Colby" he chuckled, double checking that he didn't miss anything. "We did it" He grinned, looking over at me.

"I can't believe you roped me into sharing an apartment with your annoying ass. I'm going to have to see your stupid face every day" I fake groaned, Colby grabbing my arms and pulling me into his chest.

"You signed it, no take backs! I can't believe we're engaged and renting an apartment together. It's almost like we're becoming real adults" He grinned, looking down at me.

"Gemma is going to love that she doesn't have to say goodbye anymore"

We decided to tell Gemma on her birthday, since we were going to be moving in on December 16th.

Colby and I sat her down in the living room and told her we had one final present for her, the now three year old not being able to sit still.

"Is it a puppy?!" She ecstatically asked, making a pit form in my stomach.

Ever since she got to hang out with Dakota, and Melissa teasingly told her to ask us for a puppy, she hasn't dropped it since.

We figured we'd give her a few weeks and she'd forget, but clearly we're inexperienced with little girls who want puppy dogs.

"So you know how Coco gave me a pretty ring and we get to spend forever together?" I asked her, Gemma fiddling with the stuffed cow she had gotten the year previous.

"Yes! He gives me ring too!" She showed me her hand, which proudly showcased the ring he had gotten her.

"Well Coco and I got an apartment together, like how me and Uncle Landon did, and you, Landon and I lived here" I motioned to the apartment, Gemma nodding. "Colby and I got one together, so you, me, and Coco can live together forever!" I exclaimed, hoping my excitement brushed off on her.

I watched a frown appear on her face, causing me to side eye Colby.

She pushed herself off the cough.

Was she not happy about this? Did she not want to move? Did I royally fuck up already?

She ran over to Colby, her arms wrapping around his legs.

"No lying?" She asked, looking up at him.

"I'm not lying. Are you happy bug?" He asked and I thanked God he did.

She quickly nodded, hiding her face in his legs.

"Then why the tears G?" He asked and I made my way over to them, crouching behind her, my hand rubbing soothing circles on her back, moving some of her hair out of the way, placing a kiss against her wet cheek.

"I dunno!" She cried, Colby chuckling and picking her up.

"Are you happy bug?" He asked and she nodded, hiding her face in his neck, melting my heart.

"No go bye bye" She cried.

I wrapped my arms around Colby's waist, sandwiching the three year old between us, and once she stopped crying, we started to explain how moving works and how she'll still be able to see her Uncle Landon whenever she wanted to and that she could pack up all her toys to the new place.

When move in day came, I was stressed out of my mind, and extremely thankful to April for offering to take Gemma off my hands for the day.

Sam, Kat and Colby were driving Colby's stuff from Nevada to California, leaving me to make all of the choices, which were surprisingly more overwhelming than you'd think.

Did I want that bookshelf in the living room? My room? The extra room? I don't know!

Sure the kitchen stuff went in the kitchen and the bathroom stuff in the bathroom, but what about Gemma's new doll house? Is that going in the living room, or her bedroom?

My dad and Logan brought in my bed, assembling it in the guest room whilst I started to unpack the kitchen stuff, Lexi and Landon working on the bathroom, wanting to get the most done in the least amount of time.

"The party has arrived!" Kat exclaimed, making her grand entrance into our new apartment. "Now where do you want Colby's box?" She laughed, shifting the box upward, struggling to keep her grip on it.

"In the living room is fine, Where is Colby?" I asked, not seeing Sam or Colby following behind her.

"They're working on carrying the bed frame up first"

Ah yes.

The bed Colby was so admit on keeping, and the reason that my bed was going in the spare room.

Colby and I treated our family and friends to some pizza and 20 bucks, the twins happily taking the cash, my dad and Logan refusing and Sam telling Colby that Colby paying for the road trip food was enough payment, Kat making a comment about how I needed the twenty dollars more than she did, which definitely felt like a low blow.

Maybe I just took it the wrong way?

I decided to let it go and work on getting Gemma's new big girl bed put together whilst Colby went to pick her up, but I caught myself wondering if I really was just in my head, or if she meant it the way it came across.

"Mommy!" Gemma squealed, running into her new room where I had just finished placing her brand new bedding on.

"Hi baby, did you have fun?" I asked which sparked her to go into telling me her entire time hanging out with Noel, followed by a load of "and then"'s causing me to get lost along the way.

Colby was put in charge of making our bed whilst I got Gemma ready for bedtime, Gemma being overly excited about taking a bath in the new bathroom.

"Bath toys?" She asked, pulling her top over her head.

"They're still on a box, I think"

"Oh.... but.... No new bath with no toys" She stated, frowning.

"Next time, okay?"

"Mommy!" She whined, the running water drowning out the pitch of her cry.

"Gemma, we have to find them. That's part of the moving process, baby"

"No ducky, no bath" She scrunched her face.

"How about we listen to some music?" I offered up, hoping I could prevent the brewing meltdown.

Thankfully she gave into the idea and even let it go that we didn't have bubbles, both of us singing along to one of my clean version playlists.

"Gonna go show Coco your cow towel?" I asked, Aaliyah having gifted her a towel that had a cartoon cow hood at the top.

I listened to her feet run down the hall, yelling "COCO! LOOK AT MY TOWEL!" as I drained the tub.

"Look at you, bug!" I heard him cheer, followed by giggles.

I slipped out of the bathroom, ready to brush her hair, preparing for the fight we were about to have.

I was nervous about our first night in the apartment, because even though it felt like when he'd sleepover... I knew it was permanent.

This is what my life looked like now, and that appeared scarier the more I thought about it.

I just kept telling myself that it was like any other day, but deep down I knew it wasn't.

I laid in Colby's... well, our bed, waiting for Colby to finish brushing his teeth, just staring at his pillow.

He had a permanent spot in my bed every single night now.

There was no, "Colby is coming over tomorrow, I need to change the bedding, buy food and do laundry" this is our home now.

I heard the bathroom door open, the light getting shut off as Colby walked into the room, tossing his clothes onto the floor.

I cleared my throat, getting him to look at me, "Once we have a hamper, you're not allowed to do that anymore. Do you know how many times my foot has tripped over your jeans when I got up to use the bathroom? I already have a toddler to clean up after. I'm not cleaning up after an almost 27 year old man" I warned, Colby nodding, crawling into bed.

"Promise?" I asked and he hummed, leaning over to kiss me.

"I'm so happy I get to be here, like this, with you, every night" I said softly, wrapping his arm over my ribs, resting under my boobs as he nuzzled into me.

The first week wasn't anything different then when he would visit, but as a couple weeks went by, things began to feel a little more complicated.

I caught myself snapping at Colby a few times, or arguing with him about household chores.

The closer we got to Christmas, and the more together our apartment was becoming, I wanted to put up Christmas décor, but when I brought up about us buying a tree, Colby shrugged it off, telling me "Maybe next year"

"What do you mean next year?! This is our first Christmas in this apartment as a little family!" I exclaimed, my voice raising as I watched Colby scroll through his phone on the couch. "Cole!" I snapped, "Can you listen to me please?" I asked, annoyed that his eyes were locked on his phone.

"What, Leighton? We spend Christmas at your parents house anyway. Why bother putting up the decor for 2 weeks just to take it down? we just got finished unpacking" He explained, and I could see the logical side of it, but that only pissed me off more.

"It's our first Christmas as a family!"

"Leighton, technically our first Christmas as a family was when Gemma was a baby"

"Ugh! WHY ARE YOU FIGHTING ME ON THIS?! We need Christmas décor anyway! What's so wrong about me wanting to put up décor for the holidays?"

"Because we're going to have to take it all down in two weeks, and we literally just got done unpacking all of our shit. I don't want to repack a bunch of décor in 2 weeks"

The tears began to well up in my eyes, so I walked away, taking a few deep breaths, but it only turned into a quivering lip as I held back my sobs.

Why didn't he want to celebrate Christmas with me? What was so wrong about putting up a few decorations together?

I felt a hot tear roll down my cheek, quickly swiping it away.

I expected him to follow after me, but when a few minutes went by, I only began to cry harder.

Did he not love me anymore?

Was all of this just one big mistake?

I dropped it for a few days, but whilst Gemma and I were walking through Walmart, we came across the Christmas décor and all of the cute ornaments and I was immediately pissed all over again.

Who was he to tell me I couldn't put Christmas décor up in my own home?

I'll just do it my fucking self, I don't need him!

"Gem, want to help mommy pick out a pretty tree?" I asked and she nodded, wandering down the aisle.

We picked out a fake green one, placing it in the cart before turning towards all of the Christmas tree décor, both of us wanting everything.

"Look mommy!" Gemma squealed, showing me a My Little Pony ornament.

"That's cute, did you see the farm animals?" I motioned towards the cow and sheep, a border collie figurine next to them.

"Puppy!" She exclaimed, jumping to point at the dog.

"There are other ones" I showed her a few different dog breeds, her eyes full of wonder.

"What's dat?" She asked.

"A begeal"

"What's dat?"

"A german shepherd"

We went on like this for a while, completely fascinated about how curious she was over the immense amount of decorations.

"Why put burger on tee?" she giggled, having looked at the big glittery food items.

"I bet if Nonna let him, Papa would put a burger on a tree"

"Burger no go on kissmas tee!" She snickered, the noise bringing the biggest smile to my face

"I love you so much Gemma"

We got home and Gemma demanded she get to carry the two bags if ornaments whilst I got the other two bags of decor.

"Coco gone?" She asked in the elevator and I nodded.

"He's working baby"

"Coco no elp?"

"He didn't want to"

"Oh..... why?"

I shrugged.

"No good" she shook her head, not bothering to wait for a reply when the elevator opened, running to our door that had the cartoon cow doormat, that way Gemma knew which door was ours.

"Urry ease!" She demanded, bouncing on her heels at the door.

I set the bags, down slipping off my shoes, "Gemma? Do you need to pee?" I asked her, trying to get her fully in the swing of potty training.

"I go pee all-eddy"

I took a deep breath, nodding.

"Next time you have to pee, tell momma okay? We need to go change your diaper now"

"No puffy?" She frowned and I shook my head. "No fair!" She whined.

"You get a puff ball in your jar when you go potty on the big girl toilet. If I gave you a puffy for peeing in your diaper, that defeats the purpose of the system bug" I laughed.

"BUT I NO GO PEE!" She began to cry, her face getting red.

"You just said you did"

"No I get puffy!" She cried, stomping her feet at me.

I rolled my eyes and led her to the bathroom, pulling a new pair of training underwear out of the drawer.

"Take your pants off please so we can change your diaper"

"I no go!" She wailed.

"Gemma, please"

"Puffy!" She cried.

"You can try again next time baby"

"But.. but... mommy!" She sobbed.

I hooked my thumbs under the band of her Jean's, dragging them down her legs, seeing she did indeed need a diaper change.

"I no need it!" She cried, shoving my hands away.

"Would you rather sit in your own pee?" I sternly asked, Gemma frowning and shaking her head, "Then let's change your diaper, and the next time you need to go potty, tell mommy and we can go. You're not in trouble Gemma"

"But no puffy?" She frowned.

"You can get one later baby"

"Now!" She whined, stepping out of the soiled training underwear, taking the wipe and practicing wiping herself before stepping into the new ones.

I ignored her demands, adjusting her pants, and felt her tug at my sweater.

"Puffy?"

"No Gemma"

"Mommy!"

"Your puff balls are for when you potty in the big girl potty" I explained again, starting to feel frustrated.

I called Logan, asking him to come over and help me carry up the heavy boxes tree, Logan bringing Harper for Gemma.

The girls giggled to themselves in the elevator, messing about before running out into the hall, squealing.

"Girls, indoor voices!" Logan called out, walking backwards towards the door, each of us having a side of the box.

"I elp!" Gemma called out, running over to her, her little hands barely reaching the box as she "helped carry" it.

Logan helped me set up the tree, mentioning how he just did this with Cynthia, asking me if Gemma was going to put the tree topper on.

"Can you reach it? I can't" I asked, fluffing out the branches.

"Yeah I can reach it, what topper did you get? Did you get an ugly angel like mom has?" He chuckled.

"Hey! Mom loves that angel! And tree angel toppers aren't ugly! Mom's is just old"

"Well... did you?"

"Yes" I shamefully admitted, Logan chuckling as I dug it out of the bag, showing him.

"I'm sorry but dolls are just creepy" he shook his head, hooking another ornament oh three.

"You literally have a daughter whose obsessed with baby dolls"

Not long after the girls came strolling out, wanting to help.

They put the decorations as high as they could reach, making the bottom of the tree cluttered compared to the top.

"Pwetty?" Gemma asked, looking over at me.

"It's very pretty lovebug"

"We-ah!" Harper yelled, showing me the chocolate lab figurine Gemma picked out. "Brown ike me!" She exclaimed, melting my heart.

"The puppy does have a familiar color to you, doesn't it? You know what else you have in common with the puppy?" I asked, "You're both so cute!" I squished my niece into a hug, loving her little giggle,

"Mama es I bown ike her! I no ow-n like emma!" She pointed at Gemma who was obvious to everything around her as Logan handed her ornaments.

"You are brown like mommy" I nodded, "Your skin is very beautiful baby. Mine is pale and icky" I wrinkled my nose, making her laugh.

"Am-ah eye me baby doll ike me!" she boasted, pointing at herself.

I loved listening to her talk, and watching her explore the world in her own way.

Harper was very different compared to Gemma, but they still shared the same curiosity similarities, just Harper was more tame about her findings, and it took a little more prodding to get a giggle or a flash of excitement.

"Momma? Etty ights ease!" Gemma asked, pointing at the tree.

I handed her the remote, letting her choose which color, when I heard the front door open, my whole body freezing.

"Coco!" Gemma shrieked, taking off toward my fiancée, my body cringing out of anticipation of his reaction. "Momma buy pwetty ights!" I heard her say and I wanted the couch to swallow me hole.

Fuck!

Please don't be pissed. Please don't be pissed. Please don't be pissed.

I saw him enter the room, his eyes widening as she turned on the lights, his blue eyes snapping to me immediately.

Shit Shit Shit Shit

I waited for him to speak, but he just headed down the hall instead.

Fuck.

"Are you staying for dinner?" I asked, Logan shaking his head.

"Gotta get back home to the wife. She's making this little one's favorite"

Logan and Harper big their goodbyes after I thanked them for their Help, Gemma informing me she had to pee.

I let her flush the toilet and she immediately asked if she could have a puffy.

"Yes G, but just one!" I warned, following her to her jar in the kitchen.

She dug out a purple one, throwing it into the jar of other purple puffs, claiming she needed to go in order by color, and that purple must go first.

Gemma helped me make dinner, and I still hadn't heard from Colby which was beginning go worry me.

Was he really that pissed at me?

It's a Christmas tree! Where is the harm in that?

Gemma out her silicone plate placemat on the table, climbing up into her chair as I dished out her food.

"Coco join?" She asked.

"I don't know baby"

"Why? Coco always eats with me" she frowned.

"I think he's moody baby"

"Why? I no do nothin" she immediately shook her head, making me smile.

"I know, just eat your dinner okay?" I kissed the top of her head, moving her hair out of her face.

The apartment was quiet, and I hated it.

It was too quiet.

The kind of quiet where you wanted to play noise just to fill the uncomfortable silence.

I picked at my food whilst Gemma gobbled hers down, asking for seconds.

I was scooping more food onto her plate when Colby entered the kitchen, silently opening the fridge.

I kept my back to him, hearing him open and close drawers.

"Leighton?" He spoke up, almost making me jump out of surprise.

"Yeah?"

"Where is the bottle opener?" He asked, getting me to turn around, my forehead wrinkling out of confusion.

"I don't know. You put it away"

"Well it's not there"

"Okay? So why would I know? I don't use it"

He gave me a look, one I've seen one too many times on my ex.

He didn't believe me.

"I'm not in the mood for your bullshit right now. Where is it?" he asked, shocking me.

"Language! Little ears!" I hissed, motioning towards Gemma who was watching us.

"Coco eat with me?" She asked, frowning when he ignored her, rapidly opening and closing drawers.

"Leighton!" He groaned, slamming a drawer shut, both Gemma and I jumping.

"What? I don't freaking know! You had it"

He rolled his eyes, opening the fridge and putting something back and walking out.

"Coco moody" Gemma muttered, pushing her food around.

When bedtime came, I threw stuff into the dryer, wiping down the kitchen counters and just trying to keep myself busy since Colby had locked himself in our bedroom.

Was he really this upset over a damn tree?

I was apprehensive to walk into my own bedroom which pissed me off immensely.

I walked into the room, seeing Colby laying in bed on his laptop.

"Are you going to talk to me anytime soon?" I asked, my arms crossing over my chest as I stared him down.

"You went behind my back" he muttered, not looking up from the screen.

Oh my god.

"It's a fucking Christmas tree, you scrooge! It's not hurting anyone! What's so wrong about putting up a damn tree full of fucking joy?!"

He looked up at me over his screen, "I told you I didn't want to do it, and you did it anyway"

"You didn't even have to help!"

"That's not the point Leighton!"

"What is so bad about me putting up a tree?"

"What if I wanted to help?"

"Oh fuck off! You didn't want to do one in the first fucking place! I'm so fucking tired of your pity party! I can't do shit without you moping around! Oh poor Colby, he didn't get his fucking way! Feel so sorry for him, OVER A DAMN CHRISTMAS TREE!"

"That's not the point Leighton! You went behind my back and did it anyway, instead of consulting me!"

"You already said no!"

"Exactly!" He exclaimed and I rolled my eyes, letting out a puff of hair through my nose. "You didn't take my opinion at all into consideration"

"YOU DIDN'T WANT TO DO IT!"

"But you did it anyway! If I knew you were going to do it anyway, I would've liked to help"

"Oh my god" I groaned, my head starting to hurt from his conflicting answers. "Are you pissed about the tree, the fact that I went behind your back, or the fact that you didn't get to help?"

"All of the above"

I took a deep breath, trying to gather my thoughts, speaking slowly, "I understand you don't want to unpack just to pack again, and if that's the only reason... I'll do it. It's not that big of a deal. I'm sorry I went behind your back and got the tree, but I really didn't see the problem in putting up a tree and I'm sorry I didn't include you in the process" I apologized, Colby shutting his laptop, swinging his legs off the bed and walking over towards me.

"I'm not a scrooge. I'm just overwhelmed, I'm sorry" he apologized, his hands slipping to my waist, leaning his head down to rest his forehead against mine.

"There are still some ornaments left if you would like to help?" I asked him, Colby cracking a smile on his face as he leaned down to kiss me.

"That sounds like fun, thank you"

* * * *

And so it begins! Buckle up ;)

Written on: January 20th, 21st, 22nd, 23rd, 24th 2023

Published on: January 24th 2023

Word Count: 7018

Part two

#colbybrock #samandcolby #samandcolbyfanfiction #colbybrockfanfiction #colbybrockimagine #colbybrockimagines #wattpad #colbybrockwattpad #samandcolbywattpad

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goddamnwebcomics · 2 months

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Monster Girl Academy: The Second Beatdown (Issues 11-14)

Monster Girl Academy remains the worst webcomic I've ever riffed. I've been holding off from riffing rest of the chapters because I wanted to save them for July 2024, which will be a special flashback month in honour of the 10th Anniversary of this blog.

However, picking the right issues to riff for that period, it's difficult. I've read so many issues of this shit, and all of them are terrible.

So, I originally wanted to riff those issues in old school way of posting the pages one by one to spite Kraw, but I don't think it matters since my blog is niche. So instead, I am going to do an issue by issue beatdown of remaining MGA chapters, and highlight everything that is wrong with them. However, I will still be posting the full pages that, if they were to be riffed normally, would receive Crappiest of Crappy Crap tags, and those pages will carry on this counter.

Let us begin with the Issue I skipped, Issue 11.

Issue 11: Nurse Rapist Returns

Zack is on grocery store, when he spots a child crying in the aisles. The child belongs to Nurse Rapist, who I didn't recognize at first because she looks so different in her civil form. Why does she have a child? Who fucking knows.

And we IMMEDIATELY see the thing that I fucking hate most about MGA. Zack's stupid fucking horny monologue. It's a shame Vincent's mom is a rapist. Maybe one day he will join Dullahan's little sister and flee this cursed city.

We're back to "Everyone's eyes are always wide shut" mode which takes this look way lewdier than it should. We conventiently learn that Nurse Rapist is a single mother and HER LIFE IS HARD.

Also, we're in page 3 and Zack has already fantasized multiple times. And they're just as ridiculous as his inner monologue.

How fucking convenient she said that, then again she is a rapist and probably taking advantage of Zack. I would feel bad for him if he wasn't such a fucking piece of shit.

Anyways, Zack asked Nurse Rapist on a date and this gets him excited.

And we already have the first CoCC page on our hands

Not only are we posting yet another shitty meme, we're also BRUTALLY besmirching the good name of David Bowie, let him rest in peace. Also god, does ANYONE have ANY public decency in this universe?

And we get an implication Nurse Rapist wasn't always a futa. So uh, does this mean the cock was caused by a late blooming? So girls with dicks ARE monsters in this world, good job Kraw. I'll be sure to tell that to my 7 transgirl friends.

Zack gets a latte for Nurse Rapist as he does more of his shitty inner monologue, I swear there's more of it in this chapter than EVER before.

We learn Nurse Rapist is also a researcher for an organization, which is kind of suspicious, and we learn her first name is something I won't remember so I'm gonna keep calling her Nurse Rapist.

Zack then makes Nurse Rapist cry when he suggests doing something about his succubus transformation instead of...having sex?

Something tells me this has happened with every NORMAL woman Zack has known during his life.

Zack then kisses Nurse Rapist and Nurse Rapist gets a boner, if what happened earlier was supposed to be an emotional scene then good god it's even worse than this comic's last attempt at being emotional. Also their date lasted like 1 page.

They go in their apartment and strip and start doing the hey nanny nanny, we also get a Kraw making a random ass reference to Food Wars?

Food Wars for those who don't know is an anime where food is treated like ecchi fanservice. I don't know why this is necessary, Zack mentions drinking ice cold beer in a hot tub with Nurse Rapist, he has mentioned food before. Dude, you sat down to watch Food Wars and forced a reference to it, that's why you did this reference.

Also, no way Zack will EVER drink beer of any kind. Pepsi is probably too intense for this moron.

After that we get this CLASSY line.

So women with penises aren't women? Maybe Kraw locked this comic behind a paywall so he can protect himself from people who rightfully want his head on a plate. Seriously, the day he writes Spinnerette to have trans representation he is fucking doomed.

Even worse than that, Zack's response to that is

Shut the fuck up, seriously.

The hey nanny nanny begins for reals and Nurse's cock is slamming against him, and then arguably the highlight of this arc happens.

Zack licks Nurse Rapist's cock, yes, your boy Zack is now OFFICIALLY homosexual. And in the next issue he fucks Minotaur's brother. If this comic actually had any guts, Zack would have a bisexual harem. Not gonna say it would make this comic any better though.

Also we get this masterpiece, Nurse Rapist officially is the first harem girl in this comic to get her own off-model cumming face. Turning it upside down will not make me not notice it, Kraw

Nurse Rapist then suggests they'd have fun with Zack's succubussy form and they kiss. Blah.

Alright I will start rating these issues from 1 to 5 stars. 1 star means, it was better than expected, 2 stars mean, it was mediocre which is still a stepup from this comic's average quality, 3 stars mean it was average shit, 4 stars mean it was shittier than average shit, and 5 stars means it's the worst issue in MGA history. For this chapter I'm gonna give it

⭐⭐⭐⭐

It would've been 3 stars if it wasn't for the terrible dialogue about Nurse Rapist wanting to feel like a woman and Zack's terrible inner monologues being more frequent than usual. Also Kraw needs to keep David Bowie's name out of his damn mouth.

Issue 13: Zack's Double Date Part 2

This is the first time in MGA history we directly follow from the events of previous issue, as Zack is still in his festival outfit and coming to Cheenotaur's apartment after pleasuring her brother all night. Zack then spots her lifting weights because gyms bro Kraw loves gyms bro that's why he has the build of a fat chipmunk.

Zack thinks Cheenotaur is mad at him for leaving, but she isn't, she is embarrassed for being so sweaty though, but of course Zack's inner monologue tells a different story.

I'm starting to think the reason Zack never says these out loud is because the girls aren't stupid enough to take his fucking simptalk.

Anyways, we see the proud Kraw tradition of Cheenotaur having ridiculous muscles, because she has to exercise or else she gets stressed. Gurl, you don't get muscles like that unless you're bodybuilding 24/7. Kraw thinks routine exercises make you a fucking bodybuilder, apparently.

They go inside to get a shower and we get an update on Cheenotaur's fish, because that was necessary. Fuck it, Dullahan's sister will never appear again, so the fish is the new best character.

Free him.

Turns out Cheenotaur built a fucking JAPANESE BATH HOUSE to his room, completely with a picture of Mount fucking Fuji on the wall, even Zack finds it ridiculous.

And Chee asks Zack to do a backrub and of fucking course this happens.

My god, you're aroused over the back of a woman. What bodypart hasn't Zack complimented yet? Teeth? Ears? Nostrils? Navel? Armpits? Fingernails? Elbows? Rectum?

Oh, hands. Zack also compliments hands. God this comic is godawful

Anyways Chee now rubs the back of Zack and Zack doesn't wanna show his boner because he fears Chee considers him a creep. HAHAAHAHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHHA

I keep forgetting other characters aren't exempted from dogshit dialogue.

She then massages Zack's cock, and then THIS HAPPENS

PFFFFTHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, I guess Zack's eye is pregnant now, who am I kidding, nobody ever gets pregnant in this shit.

So will Zack praise his eye for being so sexy? I mean, he did cum on it. This is funny, I hope that happens to him anytime he does an inner monologue from now on.

PFFFFT THIS GETS EVEN BETTER. Though I think him being shot in the eye with cum is funnier, I think getting sperm in your eye would be painful. And who the fuck is Osha?

Then Chee does a sexy pose and...I have to say she doesn't look THAT bad. I mean, she looks way better without those ridiculous fucking poms and the lipstick. She is still not a fucking minotaur though.

Of course we can't have a sex scene without inner monologue

And then Zack gets crushed by thighs, and we get another amazing visual of Zack's HEADLESS BLOODY CORPSE ON THE GROUND.

If I knew any better I'd say Kraw wrote this chapter to please me, but nah, I only accept permanent deaths.

And then they have back sex. Yes, seriously, fucking BACK SEX.

There are times I feel Kraw is playing too safe, and then he throws this thing into the mix which is so overly specific I don't think anyone but him likes it. And then Zack's dick breaks.

And then we end on this note, I have no clue what this means. I guess Zack died, I wish that was true.

⭐

Yes, this chapter was probably the best chapter in the entire comic thus far. The amount of Zack abuse we got actually made it kind of funny. Maybe this will become a running gag and reading this comic will become easier!

Sadly, next chapter proved me wrong, hard.

Issue 14: Tongue of the Fat Cat

Zack hears that a new coffee shop has opened which is ran by a cat girl.

Haha, everyone knows Worky Zark can't draw furries, or Kraw doesn't allow him to.

Zack is of course excited as once again his inner monologue takes over. He even calls catgirls NE Plus Ultra of catgirls, what the fuck does that mean?

Oh wow, that is an actual statement, not a reference to anything. I don't get Zack's excitement over catgirls, he has banged minotaurs, eldritch horrors, dullahans, centaurs and dickgirls. Catgirls are just girls with EARS AND A TAIL. At least the other girls I mentioned have some specific traits to them.

Zack goes to investigate and oh no, she is fat!

Fat??? FAT??? Godfuckingdamn it Kraw you did it AGAIN. Yeah this page gets another CoCC tag. How the fuck has Kraw forgotten what HYPER is? Or maybe Worky Zark can't draw fat chicks, nah, you know this was 100% asked and detailed and refined by Kraw.

And this doesn't look anything like a cat. It looks more like a fox or squirrel, what with that poofy tail and that weird orange shade that doesn't match any cat aside cartoon ones like Garfield. You're fucking a human female Garfield, Zack. I hope you're proud.

Of course, she is a stranger and she shows her ass to this boy and of course Zack goes nuts.

Her name is "Fatcat", although she ISN'T FUCKING FAT and of course Zack thinks basic self-awareness is sexy.

So Zack is now working for Fat Cat, and they have a little bit of sexual tension which is expected.

And then of course, Fat Cat gets stuck somehow and Zack has to grab her booty so she can shove her. So typical. You know, some of you may think that I am complaining about porn comic having porn comic situations, but this situation is so fucking forced even by porn comic standards. "As a boss, I am ordering to shove my booty!" In any other porn comic instead of her getting stuck she would've just asked Zack to grab her ass because you know she fucking hired Zack despite Zack having no work experience, of course she's gonna fuck him.

You know, like this. Yeah, after Zack gets her out of the frame, she asks for belly rubs. This is not cat behaviour, cats objectively HATE bellyrubs. I know because I have a cat, and giving her a bullyrub is like a death sentence!

She is not fucking fat. Nurse Rapist is a woman, Cheenotaur might be moe, Hua might be modest but she is not fucking fat.

And then of course, Fatcat reveals her massive granny panties which she throws at Zack's face. Maybe it's me but I just don't fucking find panties to be sexy and I don't know why anyone else does.

She is now naked and Zack bangs that Female Human Garfield ass as expected. The End.

⭐⭐⭐

This was the usual MGA trite, we have the fat girl whose boobs and ass are only fat and she finds Zack hot and they bang. That's it. She doesn't look like a cat, I think Kraw just finds female human Garfield hot. I am not going to kinkshame that but least you could do is ask Worky Zark to learn how to draw fat chicks before you call her fat. Oy vey...

Anyways, this was gonna go on for a lot longer but tumblr image limit crashed my plans. I will continue anytime I am in a bad mood.

#monster girl academy #review #crappiest of crappy crap

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neptunetheplanet7 · 3 years

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𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐰𝐨 - 𝐢𝐜𝐞 𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐦

DM ME IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO BE PUT ON THE TAGLIST!!

;mikasa ackerman x fem!lesbian!reader

;modern au, band au

word count: 2.1k

warnings: swearing, floch’s bad flirting

bold italics is a text conversation

listen to the music masterlist

prev | next

disclaimer again!! i wrote this a long time ago. i know there are things that need to be fixed and things that don’t fit right. i plan to edit this story more in the future but today is not that day :)

You took a shaky breath in as you stopped midway of putting a clean sheet on the bed Mikasa would be sleeping in. The room still had some of her old stuff in it, it's just no one ever came in here after she left. You looked around at all the items she left behind. Smiling fondly at an old picture of you two, you noticed a small figure crossed out in the background. Glancing at the rest of the photos on the shelf, you noticed that every photo had something crossed out.

After looking at each picture, you came to the conclusion the figure was Jean. She must have only taken the photos without him and did this to the rest. You frowned and walked back to the bed. Carefully, you climbed onto it and propped a few pillows up to support you as you leaned back.

For the first time in two years, you got a good look around the room. On the side of the room with the door, there was a large glass window overlooking the balcony above the living room. You always found it strange that she chose a room like that when she usually kept those blinds shut. Her bed was in the middle of the room with a tv mounted on the wall across from it. On the other side of her bed, there were a couple of bean bags below the bay window that looked out on the driveway.

You sighed and took out your phone, pulling up old texts with Mikasa. The last time you texted her was three months ago when you got too drunk at one of Reiner's ragers.

mikasa

mikasas pleasdse

come home

i miss you

i miss you so much

we all miss you so much

come home to me.

She didn't respond to that and you wouldn't know if she even looked at it. She turned her read receipts off for everyone after the first week of trying to contact her. The only time she had ever contacted anyone was two weeks after she left the house.

Don't look for me. Don't contact me.

You got a lot of your friends asking if you got the same message. She sent the same thing to everyone who tried to get in contact with her. You still didn't know where she was or what she was doing. The only thing you knew was that she was coming home the next day. You sighed. Suddenly, you didn't feel like cleaning anything else. You briskly walked out of her room and dialed the number of your best friend.

"Hey, Y/n! What's going on?" Sasha's cheery voice rang through the line.

"Hey hey, Sasha. I'm doing great. At least, I think I am. Do you wanna go somewhere? You can pick me up? Or I can pick you up if you like."

"I'll come to pick you up, honey bunny, don't you worry." You heard her struggling with her keys on the other side of the line and snorted at the noise.

"Need some help, Sash?" You grinned while skipping steps.

"Fine, thanks." She grumbled. "I'll be there in fifteen! You stay put!" She briskly hung up.

Sasha had been your best friend ever since Eren's nineteenth birthday party. She caught you and Eren coming back inside just as she was about to leave, with half the pantry in her arms. She asked for your number to make plans to hang out and chat sometime. You happily obliged, which was probably the happiest thing you had done that night.

You tossed your phone onto your bed as you walked into your room. Your room was on the first floor. You got first pick since you were the one who inherited the house. The house was big and beautiful. It was also on a lake. Perfect for the parties Eren and Jean loved to host. Perfect escape from paparazzi.

Your room had big glass doors that opened to the balcony that wrapped around the back of the house. You had a great view of the lake. The room was painted white. There was a black marble fireplace in one wall with a small wardrobe you used for storing memorable items to the band. You didn't need to use it for clothes since you had a walk-in closet in the big bathroom you partly shared with your bandmates. Jean liked to use the large bathtub.

You collapsed onto the bed and stared into the vanity mirror next to it. It was then when you realized you were still in your pajamas. "Oh shit." Your eyes widened as you hurriedly stumbled over to the closet, falling over once.

You grabbed a pair of baggy sweats and a big t-shirt. With duck socks, of course. The outfit didn't look much different than your pajamas but Sasha would probably be wearing something similar.

You threw your hair into the easiest hairstyle you could muster. You grabbed your boots and hopped up and down while trying to put them on while also leaving the room. "Jesus." You muttered.

Your phone vibrated, signaling that Sasha was here. "I'm heading out with Sasha! You're on your lonesome!" You called out to wherever Armin was in the house.

"Okay! Don't be back too late!" He shouted back.

You laughed aloud as you realized how much he sounded like a dad. You opened the front door and ran to Sasha's car. "Let me in!" You knocked on the passenger window as she reached around to find the button that unlocks the door. Once it was unlocked, you swung open the door and hopped inside.

"Nice outfit," was the first thing she said to you. You glanced at her outfit and scoffed. Your predictions were correct, she was wearing something similar.

"Gee, thanks." You gave a lopsided smile and rolled your eyes.

"Where to, honey bunny?" Sasha said, giving a mock salute while her other hand rested firmly on the steering wheel. You giggled and thought about it. You called her on such a whim that you forgot to even plan anything.

"Uh how about Brain Freezes? I could really use a catch-up with Connie right about now." You suggested.

"That sounds like a great idea! Turns out you do have a brain up there." Sasha snickered.

"Oh good one, because you're the real genius here, clearly."

After a lot of lighthearted banter, you arrived at Connie's workplace. Sasha aggressively grabbed the door handle and slammed it open, causing the bell to fall off its perch and land on your face. "Oops." You grimaced and bent down to pick up the bell. You rang it in front of her face.

"Sasha! Y/n! My two favorite customers!" Connie jumped up and down on the other side of the counter. "How can I assist you ladies today?"

"I'll have the usual." You gave a half-hearted smile, head still impaired from the bell. Sasha had quite the habit of accidentally hurting you.

Sasha snatched the bell from your grasp and started ringing it. She announced her very long order that you could barely keep up with, but Connie was used to this kind of thing, especially with her.

You noticed one of his coworkers scowling at Sasha. You didn't like Floch, to say the least. He was always inviting himself to your parties but he was rude to all of your friends at the same time. He noticed your gaze and smirked.

He strutted over to where you stood, pretending to become very interested in toppings. "How are you, Y/n? It's been a while huh?" He leaned over your shoulder in a way that workers shouldn't with their customers. You made a hasty effort to slip away from his presence.

"It really hasn't. I came here last week. I come here every week and you say that every time." You usually tried to be nice to Floch, but today you didn't feel like being nice.

"Well, even a day without you feels like an eternity." He flirted horridly. You stared blankly at him until he awkwardly cleared his throat and traded spots with Connie at the register.

Connie took off his apron and handed you and Sasha your orders. "Sorry about him. That guy really can't take a hint even if it's right in front of his face." He shot Floch a venomous glare. "Luckily, you guys got here right as my shift ended! Wanna get out of here?" His previous anger seemed to dissipate in an instant.

"Yeah, I do! Where should we go?" Sasha beamed with her spoon still in her mouth.

"Can we just drive around? I've got something I wanna tell you guys." You played with your spoon in the ice cream, averting eye contact.

"Sure thing, Y/n. Let's go." Sasha and Connie said in unison.

Sasha let you drive her car since she was preoccupied with her mountain of ice cream. Connie didn't have a car, he failed his driver's test every time he took it. You'd think he'd learn most of the material by now. "Hey, Y/n?" He asked from the backseat.

"Yeah?" You nodded to him.

"Are you gonna finish that?" He said, referring to your cup of ice cream in the front cupholder. You sighed.

"Go ahead." He thanked you over and over as he leaned over and snatched it.

"So, Y/n? What was it you wanted to tell us?" Sasha wiped her hands on her pants and set the empty container in an extra cupholder.

You gripped the steering wheel harder then relaxed. You took a shaky breath in. "Mikasa is coming home tomorrow."

Connie started choking on your ice cream. "I know, I had the same reaction." You quipped.

"Mikasa..is...WHAT?" Connie managed between coughs.

"After all this time? It's been two years. Tomorrow? That's so sudden! Are you even ready to see her?" Sasha's mouth was gaping open. You leaned over and shut it for her.

"Yes, tomorrow. I still have to get the house ready. I couldn't even make it through her old room without calling you. Jean told us this morning. I don't think we should be worried about me being ready to see her. I think we should be more concerned about her and Jean." You informed. "But, then again, she told Jean about her return first. Plus he's picking her up tomorrow at the airport. So based on that, I think they're on better terms."

"You don't think they'll get back together, do you?" Connie said, his eyebrows furrowing.

You snorted. "Of course not. You know Jean is with Marco now, and he seems pretty happy with him. They've been together for two years now, probably longer if I'm being honest."

"Then what do you have to worry about?" Sasha asked, confused.

"Are you joking? I mean, what if she has found someone? What then? What if she quits the band forever? What if we argue? She dropped off the map two years ago. Completely. She stopped responding to me, to all of us. For two years I thought she lost her interest in everything and went to live a new life, with people better than me. And now she's coming back, out of the blue! It's too much." You stressed.

Connie and Sasha made quick eye contact. "Y/n, I think you're reading too far into it. I doubt anyone could lose interest in you. You're too cool! Let's look on the bright side, she's ready to come home and you finally get to see her again," Sasha said in an attempt to lift your spirits. You smiled graciously. You really were lucky to have a friend like her. "Right, Connie?" She gestured to Connie who looked very deep in thought.

"Didn't you and Mikasa go out in high school?" You almost crashed the car from the shock of the question.

"Briefly, yes. But we weren't 'going out' so to speak. We just, like, made out a couple of times." You could feel your face grow hot at the subject. You thought you were over your crush on Mikasa, but after hearing that she was coming home, the familiar feeling was coming back.

"You're going red, Y/n. I think it was more to you than just a make-out." Connie grinned while Sasha wiggled her eyebrows.

"You're totally in love with Mikasa!" Sasha sang.

"Shut up, you two. I don't wanna get into the details right now." You couldn't even try to hide your heated face since you were the one driving the vehicle.

"Not right now? So maybe somewhere down the line, you will?" Sasha raised her eyebrows and broke out into another infectious grin.

"Whatever, Sash. Enough about Mikasa and me. I really wanna hear about you and Niccolo." You gave her a similar grin while she slowly turned red.

"Nice one, Y/n!" Connie cheered.

"You idiots should just shut it!"

posted: 8/24/21

no reposts, edits, or modification to my work by anyone other than me.

#mikasa x reader #mikasa x you #snk fanfiction #aot fanfiction #mikasa ackerman #band au #modern au

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m-aster-of-spinjitzu · 3 years

Text

orange and gold

...I just need more Cole and Vania content, they seem like they'd be great friends.

Basically it's just 'Cole goes to visit her there, they almost burn down the kitchen, and make way too many puns', lol.

Set a few months after Master of the Mountain, but before Seabound or The Island.

Also yeah, I couldn't think of a better title, sue me- I just know that they wear one of the colours at some point, so... 🤦‍♀️😂

Trigger warnings: none I think? Huh-

Also, bingo!! I really need to learn better time management, dear freaking gosh- I hope I'm not too late though? I know it's like half a day late, eek- and I was supposed to post this earlier, but I ended up literally falling asleep while writing it😂

Thank you so much Fabro, for hosting such a cool event!:D Your comments on my fics literally never fail to make my day<3. And I'm so glad that I met so many awesome, really skilled people through this event too - it's been a lot of fun working alongside y'all:D, I wish I'd had more time to interact instead of posting stuff and vanishing lol, but exams be like:////

Prompt: cooking (does baking count as cooking? I realized too late lol-) from @ninjago-bingo 's warm board.

Word Count: 2497

---

Trying to escape from killer dire-bats hadn't been on Cole's to do list today - although the mountains were kind of beautiful.

It was a bit difficult to see them while he was being dragged to his death, but hey, didn't Jay always tell them to be more positive?

That was, until he made the mistake of looking down.

Miles of snowcapped mountains touched the pastel blue sky, but he was more focused on exactly how high he was from the ground.

Great.

Trying to swing back onto the Bounty, he didn't notice a golden-winged blur shoot past the bat, almost dropping their spear in haste.

"Let my friend go, or I'll-"

"Vania?"

She throws the spear at the bird, successfully knocking one of its wings.

Huh. She must've been practicing - throwing with accuracy while flying seemed kinda difficult.

"I'm so sorry!" she replies, grabbing his arm before he fell down too. She winces at the strain on her wings, almost dropping him onto the deck. "I was supposed to come earlier, but there was an issue with one of the mines, and it took forever to-"

"There ain't anything in this world that's managed to kill me yet," he replies jokingly, checking that the autopilot hadn't been damaged. "I doubt an angry bird is going to be the first."

"Didn't you mention that you became a ghost once? Pretty sure that means you were dead-"

"Shh, that's not an important detail," he jokes.

"If you say so," she replies with a grin. "Did I mention that Chompy's been tearing down the palace flower arrangements again?"

"Send my regards to the gardener-"

"Did you just make a pun?"

"Remind me why I decided to visit you again?"

"Because you love me?" she asks stepping onto the ground as the Bounty landed gently.

"I hereby crown you as my platonic soulmate," Cole deadpans, taking her hand. "Vania and Cole-"

"Destined to annoy each other for eternity," she giggles, swinging their hands up and down. "But seriously - thanks. I don't think I realized how much work being a queen was."

"What's it like?"

"I mean - I'm glad that people trust me, and they come to me if they have a problem, but the paperwork is a nightmare. I never get to go outside anymore, I swear."

"Paperwork? Also, you just invited me here for a week. I don't wanna disturb you?"

"Nah, I cleared my schedule, don't worry. And trust me, you don't want to know. Everything requires some sort of official written thing, and it's so boring-"

"Official? But you're the queen?"

"Well, yeah, but I don't really want to change something unless it benefits the people. Not after..."

Her smile dims, eyes straying to the palace walls.

Oh- oh.

"You're nothing like him," Cole says firmly, squeezing her hand. "I mean, if you need to take a break, or you can make your job a bit easier by cutting out something unnecessary, that's just gonna help you become a better queen. You've definitely got the interests of your people at heart, and that's the most important thing, you know? And well, uh, everything seems to be going great so far - you don't have to beat yourself up over someone else's mistakes."

"Thanks," she replies softly, her smile slowly returning. "Speaking of breaks, what do you think we should do this time?"

"You could show me around the city again?"

"You've already seen everything cool," Vania giggles, skipping ahead of him. "We don't renovate much - unlike you guys-"

"Hey, it's not our fault that our city gets destroyed every few months-"

"More like every few days," she teases, tying back her golden hair. "How about we find some dragons to adopt?"

"Tempting, but where would you keep them?"

"They could sleep in my room-"

She breaks off when she notices him laughing. "What?"

"N- nothing," Cole replies, in between laughs. "Jay and I just made a bet."

"On what?"

"How many dragons you've adopted. I bet at least six, he bet fifteen."

"Well, jokes on both of you - I'm pretty sure my advisor's going to throw a fit if I show up with another one," she starts, giggling. "We've got twenty living in the palace right now."

"Twenty dragons?"

"They're so cute! You just look into their adorable little eyes," Vania pauses for breath, continuing her animated gesturing, "and you can't help but wanna hug them!"

"Oh, Jay's going to be so mad."

"Aww, I'm sorry guys. They're just too adorable!"

"...Wanna hear a funny story?"

"Yeah, sure!"

"I actually used to be terrified of dragons-"

"No way!" Vania exclaims. "Y'all have been on a lot of adventures though, so-"

"Nah, we used to have our own dragons at first. They were pretty cool! I just- I'm a simple guy! Huge animals with wings are scary up close when you're barely a teenager."

"Or when you're really short-"

"We're the same height!" Cole exclaims, facepalming in a bit of a fondly exasperated way.

"I'm two years younger than you-"

---

"Ugh, whose idea was this?"

"Yours," Vania grins, sitting down on the kitchen counter.

"You were supposed to help me, not leave me high and dry!" Cole accuses jokingly, staring at all the appliances they'd found in the cupboards.

"'One must always be prepared for new adventures,'" she quotes seamlessly, waving one of- what was his name again? Mulch something? Oh! Clutch! Some explorer he was, leaving them to die in the pyramid - Clutch Powers' books in the air.

"Fine," he sighs, staring at the old recipe book she'd found in one of their back cupboards. "But you've gotta help me? I almost burned down-" "Woah, what? If you finish that sentence with 'kitchen'-" "In my defense, Kai was playing a prank on me-" "In my defense, I wouldn't like to explain how the queen of Shintaro burnt down the palace by teaching one of her friends to cook," she grins, flipping through the pages. "What do you wanna start with?" "Something simple?" "Have you ever tried baking bread before? It's a lot of fun!" "I haven't really had the time, but that sounds kinda interesting."

He skims the recipe, raising his eyebrows. "Wait, why does this take hours? I thought you said it was simple?"

"Trust me, it is," she laughs, adding, "besides, I still wanna hear about all your adventures!" "Uh... okay," Cole replies hesitantly, "but if this fails, I'm so sorry." "Give yourself some credit, you guys literally saved the world! Multiple times!" "Bold of y'all to assume we know how we did it," he laughs, only half-kidding. "Besides. I botched soup once."

"I've botched toast," she mock-sighs, smiling. "Pretty sure that makes us even."

"Lemme get this straight. You've messed up toasting bread, but you can bake it from scratch?"

"Trust me, I don't know either," she giggles, trying to open a brightly coloured packet of... something? Did flour come in packets that small?

"Uh, why are you opening something called 'feast'?" he asks, eyebrows creased in confusion.

"Feast," she echoes, trying to stifle her laughter. "Off to a... rocky start, aren't we?"

It took him a second.

"I already regret this," he jokes, facepalming. "But I'd say that your puns are, uh, gold."

"I've un- unleashed-" breaking off, she half-falls off the counter, laughing so hard her face starts to go red, "a monster."

---

"Uh, is it supposed to look like that?" Cole asks, frowning.

The mixture looked less like the dough he'd been expecting - more like one of Jay's inventions gone wrong.

Badly wrong, he thought, eyes widening at the goopy mess of foam that threatened to spill over the jug.

"The yeast?" Vania echoes, poking her head out of one of the cupboards. "Yeah, all good! It always looks a little gross, and you're gonna doubt ever eating bread again, but at least it doesn't taste like it's fermented-"

"It's what?"

"Yeah," she grimaces, exaggerating her disgust a bit. "If aliens ever fell from the sky, they'd think we were crazy for eating bread-"

"Aliens? I think we're a bit crazy!" Cole exclaims, trying not to laugh.

Vania smiles, then sighs, lugging a huge bag of flour onto the counter. "I can never open these bags properly," she starts, eyeing the the bag a bit warily, "and it always makes such a huge mess all over the kitchen. You'd think they'd make it easier for people to use, right? I swear-"

He jokingly puts his hands over his ears. "I can't hear you!" "But you know that I've sworn off swearing-" she replies, breaking off with a laugh. "Pun not intended - that actually made sense in my head. I swear!"

"No," Cole interjects with a grin, shaking his head. "You don't, remember?"

"See, this is why we're friends-"

"Friends? Is that all I am to you?"

"Oh, be quiet," she shoots back, exaggeratedly dragging a hand down her face. "I mean, sure, just because everyone thinks that we're dating doesn't mean that we-"

Wait. What?

"People think that we're dating?" he asks, clamping a hand over his mouth in a poor attempt to muffle his laughter. "I- I- really?"

"I know, right?"

"Even my friends thought so at first," he confesses, dragging a hand down his face. "I mean, as much as I love you-"

"I love you too," Vania replies, completely seriously. "Even if you'll always be more like an annoying-"

"Hey-"

"Sibling to me than anything else," she finishes, grabbing a pair of scissors. Cole watches, a little alarmed, as she stabs them into the flour bag over and over.

"Is it... supposed to be this difficult to just open the bag? Seems kinda stupid-"

"Well, er, they have this piece of paper with glue that you're supposed to pull away from the rest of the bag, but it never works properly and I-"

"Well, we could always make our own flour," Cole interjects, laughing. "I mean, I've got a scythe? Let's go!"

"Uh, but we don't have wheat growing here. I don't think it'd suit the climate very well?"

"Wheat a shame," Cole sighs jokingly, measuring out the flour (which had, finally, escaped the bag).

"Oh my gosh," Vania deadpans, "you did not just-"

"Yep, I did."

"You're horrible," she giggles, "then again, I was the one who started this whole debacle, so I think we'll share the blame."

"Debacle? Where'd you pick that one up from? Sounds kinda cool-"

"Oh, it's from a book someone wrote about you guys," Vania says casually, pouring a cup of water into the bowl.

"Hey, uh-" Cole starts hesitantly, twisting his fingers back and forth, then breaks off. "Why'd you read all that stuff about us, anyways? Adventure books don't really seem like something you read a lot, since we have similar favorite books. I mean..."

"Well, um..." Vania trails off, clearly uncomfortable. "Uh- I guess, well, it sounds kinda stupid, but I'd never really met anyone my age who wasn't a royal or something. I... er, I didn't want to be left out, you know?"

Cole thinks back to a scroll; a quest, a sacrifice. One that his friends never seemed to really notice, unless it was with horror or flinches. Not that he blamed them, but - joking about how he was much more useful to the team when he was freaking dead than he was before he'd stumbled and fell in the temple?

That had been a bit far, even for his best friend. Locks could always be picked or something, he didn't need to be a ghost to provide some sort of value-

Well, that's not completely true, is it? a small voice questions, and he can't keep his hands from shaking a little.

"Jay here thinks you're the least valuable ninja."

Not enough to be a performer. Now, not good enough to even be a ninja, apparently.

Well, he reminds himself firmly, you don't have to be the best - just stand up to those who are cruel and unjust.

Nothing but a scar that glowed warm orange occasionally left of the whole Cursed Realm ordeal, sometimes it was all too easy to forget - or pretend - that it had never even happened in the first place.

Other times, like when he'd dropped a glass of water on the floor and his hands hadn't stopped shaking for hours, or when he woke up screaming, expecting to fall through his bed again, it still felt like he was trapped as a ghost. Literally - and maybe a little figuratively as well.

Yeah. Yeah, I know.

"Thanks for trusting me with that," he replies softly. "And I'm sorry. That sounds... horrible, but, honestly, you're a pretty cool person, and I ain't just saying that because we're friends. People can be awful, and they can- they can leave, but you don't need to pretend to be someone you're not for people to accept you. I kinda know what it's like, and it's... just, uh, not great."

"No, thank you," Vania says, rubbing her eyes. "You're pretty cool, too. And I'm glad that we become friends, even if wasn't in the- the, er, greatest circumstances."

"Right back at ya. The fall was pretty terrifying, though," Cole says casually, as if memories of that nightmarish plunge into the depths of earth don't still send shivers down his spine.

"No, definitely! I was so sure we were gonna splat onto the ground or something, thank gosh we didn't."

"Yeah..." Cole trails off, reading the recipe they'd been following. "Oh- do we just leave the bowl somewhere for a few hours now?"

"Oh, yeah," Vania answers. "Other than clean up the kitchen, what else do you wanna do?"

"That's kind of you, but, ah, I don't mind. You can choose something."

"I don't mind either," she replies, covering the bowl with a dishcloth. "Seriously, I don't."

"Same here though."

"Really, I don't mind-" Vania breaks off with a laugh, adding, "Well, actually, there is something."

She doesn't elaborate, thoughtfully gazing out the window.

"Well, what is it? Don't keep me in the dark."

"Ugh, it's kinda stupid-"

"I'm sure that it's not- well, unless you want to try to jump off a flying ship with a homemade parachute to prove a bet to someone-"

"Do I even wanna know?"

"...uh, probably not. We're way too crazy sometimes, our Master has a hard time keeping us in check. Your thing, though?"

"Can I give you a hug?"

Cole blinks for a second, expecting some sort of punchline.

"That's your thing?"

"Well, yeah- I mean, I said it was kinda stupid-"

"No no, that's not what I meant. You're so sweet - that's all."

"Well, not more than you-"

"Nah, you're sweeter-"

"Let's just call it a tie," Vania says with a smile, reaching over to give her friend a hug. "Thank you so much, I swear- well, no, I don't, but you know, anyways-"

"Yeah," Cole replies, laughing softly. "I know."

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stargaze-issei · 4 years

Text

— "𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐞" (𝐛. 𝐤𝐚𝐭𝐬𝐮𝐤𝐢 𝐱 𝐟𝐞𝐦!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫)

𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐭; when your father, the head of the japanese mafia, was killed, your childhood friend swore to protect you till his death. now, you're the empress of the underground world, and he doesn't know what's harder, to keep you safe or manage to hide his feelings. what will he do when, for the first time, your life's at risk and he isn't anywhere near?

𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞; mafia!au, angst.

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬; swearing, mentions of blood, guns, murder, kidnap, yk... mafia stuff.

𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭; 2.7k

𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞; lemme know if u want a part two bc i felt like it was getting too long and i don't know if anyone will read it or like it 👉🏻👈🏻

"where the fuck are you?" bakugou's voice stroke over the phone, noticeably angry. he had told you several times to never go anywhere without him, which you mostly did, if it weren't for him being away a lot of times. nothing less was expected from your right hand, who handled every dirty job, and considering your line of work, it wasn't scarce. but you did had other bodyguards, just as trained as katsuki, willing to give their lifes for you, which was extremely better than having bakugou giving his life.

to his eyes, you were still the little girl from before. he saw you as a someone who needed protection. at first, you agreed. your father was murdered, someone managed to get through all his security and killed him, none of the guns he and his security team carried around could protect him, killing you would be like stealing a sweet from a baby. bakugou had always kept you safe, despite his agressive usual safe, he cared about you more than he cared for himself. so you stuck to his side, believing, hoping, he'd die for you. but that was a long time ago, now, you could defend yourself, and had raised a sense of loyalty in your people by your own. your father's empire was based in fear, yours? by admiration. you didn't see your people as working ants, but as important parts of a whole. still, anyone who was a threat to you, bakugou made sure to erase them forever.

"don't talk to me like that, i'm your boss" you could feel him losing his shit, a smile began to form in your face. even when everyone respected you, he was still the same.

"you can't boss anyone if you're fucking dead, you dumb shit" a laugh came out of your throat, he couldn't avoid smiling at the sound "wait, oh, okay, i know we're you are. stay there, i'll be in three" he hung up before you could reply.

you looked back, at one of your guards who was just putting away his phone. of course they told him. why couldn't you go get your own coffee? being in the office all day was tiring, to be five minutes outside was all you asked for. a few seconds after, they handed you your coffee, obviously, a guard had to try it first, in case that barista wanted to suddenly murder you. of course he didn't.

"who let her go outside without me knowing, huh?" a furious katsuki appeared through the door, making a scene in the place. you gave him a warning look. if there was something you hated, was that. everyone in the area knew who you were, but why make it any more obvious. those people were just living their usual lifes, and people tend to get nervous around you. "the car is waiting outside" he understood, but you knew he was going to scold you anyways.

you walked outside, smiling, and got into the car, followed by katsuki and one of his subordinates, the other one got in the front sit, next to the driver.

"save it, i'm n–"

"the fuck you are" he cut you "your safety is my responsibility, if i say you can't go out without me, then you fucking don't. specially not when there are people after your head" there was no denying he was right, but still, it upset you.

"there's always people after my head, bakugou".

two weeks ago, two men went into your office. they were in charge of some dealing territories, though small, important. most contraband had to pass those places, you controlled those police departments making everything easier to your truck drivers. they were beaten, cover in blood and barely standing.

"our men, all of them... they all..." only one of them could talk, the other being too shocked to even look at you. "kazuhito's men, it was them... they said we had to tell you, they're coming after you" you couldn't show any fear in front of your so called soldiers, and your template remained at ease. a shout was enough to get those men the help they needed, after holding their hands, you promised to go see them once they were checked by doctors. you called bakugou as soon as they left, he was the first who should know and help you decide what to do next.

the kazuhito family had always been rivals, enemies of the worst kind. everyone suspect they were behind your father's assassination, but with no proof, even you knew it would be the biggest mistake to charge against them, despite your personal desires.

"i already told the drivers they had to take rout b for a while, but we can't let them just keep what's our" you explained to katsuki once he arrived. "those drugs have to get in town by us, damnit". it was clear how frustrated you were, those assholes had mess with your and your father's hardwork.

"if we retaliate, a war will unchain. your father tried to avoid that for years"

"and see how he ended up" bakugou didn't know if it was the anger, or you talking. "we will lose everyone's respect if we don't do something, they killed dozens of our people, katsuki".

he was trying hard to stay objective in that situation, but it was near impossible. a war would put you in more danger than ever, your life was at stake, and bakugou wasn't sure if he was willing to risk it. growing up by your side, your father taking him in when his parents died, you were his only family. more than that, he loved you. the only reason he was able to do his job right, was the fear of losing you. your head was already valued in millions, how could he protect you in the middle of a conflict, that would end only with your death or the kazuhito's leader's death? your power was bigger than theirs by little, but they did something that reckless, which meant they thought they had out powered you. had they? or were they just bluffing? had they miscalculated?.

"we're taking action, wether you support me or not" you looked into each other's eyes, you knew him enough to understand his fear, just not the reason behind it. your voice softened "but i'd much rather do it with you by my side".

"you're the boss" he spoke, already regretting it "i'll schedule a meeting so the high charges let everyone else know, i'm staying at your place so we can trace a plan".

and there you were now, being reprimanded by bakugou. he was extremely tired, he decided to stay with you until things were calmer, which could be several months from then. getting up at six a.m, going to sleep past midnight, being always looking for possible threats, it had given him bags under his eyes.

"i'm sorry" you said once you were alone with him, it was only then that you could let your guard down "i'm making this harder for you".

"yeah, you are. but it's my job, after all" that came out wrong, he thought. it wasn't his job, it was his fucking life purpose. he wanted you to live a long, happy life, as hard as it seemed.

"i guess it is" deep down, his response disappointed you.

"hey, look at me" out of nowhere, his body was insanely close to yours, you felt his breath in your face as he lifted your chin with his finger "there's nothing i wouldn't do for you, got that, dumbass?"

for a brief moment, the taste of his lips was all you could think about. i bet they're soft. but as fast as it started, it was over, katsuki pulled away harshly, inventing an excuse to leave. he had flown too close to the sun, so close that it burned his skin.

a few more people went to see you that day, asking for diverse permissions, advice and stuff like that. since it had been slow, compared to other times, you decided to home early. a call to your team, and the car was already outside. bakugou left instructions for your departure, because he had things to do somewhere else, much to his displeasure. you were accompanied by your escorts to the doors of the building, that seemed like a normal office compound. there were waiting two other guards, making a total of six people protecting you. way to go, bakugou.

"how's your wife, ryota?" you asked the driver. of course, not everyone fitted in the same car, so you got into the second one, middle seat, between a built up woman and a big man. you tried to remember everyone's name, but it was difficult.

"she's good, ma'am, sends her regards" he smiled at you over the mirror.

"and the baby? he must be a month old, right?" at the memory of his child, his face lightened "you should take some days off, i bet your wife and son miss you"

"i have a duty with you, m–" a loud impact interrupted him, the front glass had exploded. the car had an abrupt movement back and forward, all you could see was blood, everywhere.

the woman next to you took her gun out, in order to protect you , you thought, completely wrong. before everyone could react to her act, she shot the guard in front of you. you looked at your side, searching for someone alive, the same bullet that had killed ryota was in the guard's at your right forehead. besides you , the only other person was that woman. if she hadn't glasses on, that stare could've seen throughout your soul. then you remembered, katsuki made you bare with a knife under your sleeve. with a weird move, you felt its sharpness against your skin, it was there, but she read you like a book. before you could even pull it out, another shot stroke followed by a intense pain in you thight. the bitch had shot you. you blamed it on the adrenaline, because nothing hurt. what happened after was a couple of blurry images in your memory.

bakugou had called you more than a hundred times, you, the drivers, the guards, everyone in his fucking team, but no one knew anything. the cameras at your house never showed you arriving, your phone's location was off. he was out of his head, if he didn't hear from you in the next five minutes, someone's going to die. he rushed into his car, following your rout at a dangerous speed.

both cars were full of bullet holes, and every guard he had hired was dead. there wasn't a place without blood. tears of pure rage came to his eyes, fuck, it was his fault. he started to look for you, but the whole world was spinning around him. where were you? where was your body? were you alive?, this couldn't be happening. he had left you unprotected, alone, and now you could be dead, because of his uselessness. his phone vibrated in his pocket.

"sir, we– we have– the kazuhito's are here" he left as fast as he came. they had touch you, they had taken you away from him, and he wasn't going to let them get away with it, even if he had to go against a whole army, whoever was behind it all was going to pay.

a man in a suit was sitting in the chair of your office, smoking a cigarette, as calm as a rock. katsuki was so close to rip his head of right there, that somebody had to hold him down. his own people updated him, saying that he had gone into the building alone, with no weapons of any kind, not even a cellphone.

"where the fuck is she?" he crashed his hand against the desk.

"ah, mr. bakugou, please take a se–"

"tell me where she is right now if you want to keep your head, fucking bastard" his hand had wondered to the tip of the gun in his belt, menacing to blow up at any second.

"you won't do that, mr., if i don't return to my people in one hour, she'll be so fucked up that not even you will recognize her" a laugh surge grom bakugou, a dark, cold laugh.

"i don't have to kill you, then" one of the man's hand rested in the desk, like asking for katsuki to rip it off his body. as you did, he also carried knifes under his shirt. in less than a second, one of them was buried into the man's hand. he screamed, both in shock and pain, giving your bodyguard a hatred look. "what do you want, shitface?"

"i-it's quite simple, actually" his face was white as paper, and even though he wanted to talk normally, his voice shivered "we want you to take over the y/l/n's business, under our command of course" he let out a sigh, trying to keep his composure and ignoring his bleeding hand "if you– if you agree, she will have to leave japan and never..."

bakugou won't agree to that. not now and not ever. to give away what you and your father built from scratch, and spent decades keeping safe, was like killing your child, and your father's memory. to send you away, alone, where he most likely won't see you again in years, was also off the table. it wasn't funny anymore. he started walking around the man's chair, picking up his sleeves. he checked the clock in the office, he had forty-five minutes with the man, meaning, forty-five minutes to make him talk. he ressourced to every fast interrogation method he knew. the people outside the door weren't surprised when they heard the man's screams, even wondering what had taken so long for the boss to start acting. katsuki was never a patient man. his senses were blocked, he couldn't hear anything but screams and begging, all his eyes could see was pain through all the man's body, his hands felt nothing but warm blood. but for the first time in a while, he wasn't enjoying it. he was doing it out of need, the need to save you. every minute that went by, was a minute were your life risked. he never felt so close to losing his sanity.

"outside the city! she's in one of our safe houses outside the city! i don't know which, please stop!" ten minutes before the timeline he finally gave up. your intelligence had all their safe houses, storages, garages, every location needed. not a second passed when one of yours men delivered a map with all the points marked. there were five in total.

"throw him outside in ten minutes" he shouted, walking to the armory "two teams, six people each, my fucking people, hear me? now, dammit! we're leaving in a minute, if i have to go by my fucking self, i'll do it"

when he was armed to the teeth, almost a dozen of people followed him outside. they were his most trusted men and women, being trained together, he knew they were as skilled as him, and they were all willing to put their life's at stake for you, their boss. in the car, bakugou barked the instructions. he had narrowed it down to two possible locations with all the information he had. if they had to kill every person in those places, then be it. he's going to get you back.

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m111nho · 3 years

Text

What a shame

What if after you joined the scouts in order to help Eren get through his Titan experiments with the special operations squad you start getting close to the captain whom you've been bickering with all along?

(A/N) I thought about this while listening to "what a shame" by leyla blue so enjoy,,,I'll probably do sum parts lol.So I'm 4'11 irl,I didn't do it so Levi would be taller.

swearing,kind of violence, insinuated smut, agegap

around 4.8k words<3

(F/N)'s POV

It's now been twenty four hours after the stupid trial they held for Eren and we are about to set off for the old scouts' quarters where Eren will be going under a number of experiments.Now don't get me wrong I love Eren but requesting me to join him with the special operations squad to help him get through it? Couldn't he have asked Mikasa or Armin instead?Well I know they chose me because I was the only one of age,still though at eighteen Mikasa is still stronger than me so I don't see a problem with her replacing me.Yesterday's still fresh in my mind,after the trial Commander Erwin and Captain Levi approached me while I was sitting with Sasha.

"Cadet (L/N) can you join us in my office?"I heard a voice behind me say,I turned around and I was shocked.Commander Erwin with Captain Levi were asking me to join them to Commander's office.Oh shit what did I do?

"Yes sir."I saluted and looked him in the eyes feeling intimidated,I didn't even look at Captain,hell he even scared me from what he did to Eren about an hour ago.He beat the shit out of him infront of everyone for god's sake!

I followed behind them through hallways taking a few turns to Commander's office.I was the last one to enter and I closed the door behind me bracing myself for what's to come.

"Please take a seat (F/N)."Said the commander and I awkwardly sat down in front of them.Then I took the courage to look at Captain only to find steely gray eyes looking back at me,however I kept looking at him while I felt my face getting hot.Now that I've taken a better look at him I don't understand why people don't find him attractive,his face is symmetrical with a straight nose and he has a killer jawline.His hair is pitch black and styled nicely and overall he has a good physique even though he is indeed short,he is taller than me by a few inches though.Of course I've heard the stories of humanity's strongest soldier and how incredible he is but to be honest after today I think that he's nothing more than an entitled ass.A very attractive entitled ass.

I turned my head around to face commander and before I could speak he started talking.

"Don't worry cadet you're not in trouble." I let out a breath I didn't know I held. "What we want from you,is kind of a command." he continued.

"Oh." I said and he probably noticed the glimmer of confusion in my (e/c) eyes.

"Well Eren Jaeger will be brought to the old quarters of the Survey Corps under the supervision of the special operations squad led by Captain Levi,"he motioned to the raven haired man who stood still with an expressionless face."And since Eren will be experimenting all the time I thought that it would be good for him to see familiar faces,so we handpicked you to join him."he finished and I was left speechless.

"Sir,I'm sure Eren would prefer for either cadet Ackerman or cadet Arlert to join him,they're all very close."I said and looked up to the intimidating commander.

"Nonesense the reason we picked you is because you're of age and on top of your class." he replied.

"It's actually cadet Ackerman who's on top,I come in second but okay.I will be joining Jaeger and the special operations squad if that's your command."I slumped down my shoulders.

He nodded and started filling me in on what I would be doing there for the rest of the month.

I sighed turning back to see Petra who was talking with Eld.Oluo was talking about something irrelevant with Eren while Gunther was just waiting for Captain's order for departure.I learned all their names yesterday at dinner since we'll spend quite some time together.Eld and Gunther were more quiet and laid back,Oluo was the one trying to imitate the captain so he talked a lot about past missions and himself.Petra was sweet and I could see she admired captain a lot.Maybe a bit too much but that wasn't for me to judge,she was a few years older than me so we clicked.

"Oi"we heard from the very front of our formation,"We're leaving,follow my lead."Captain Levi said with a stone cold face.

A couple of ''yes sir's" were thrown and we started our journey on our horses.By noon we could see the White castle nestled in between the green of the forest.I was chatting with Petra about her Father,he seemed very sweet like her,when captain spoke.

"So when we arrive we'll be cleaning the whole place,got it?" he said looking at me and Eren.

Both of us nodded frantically but I sighed internally.I never really liked cleaning,I found it boring but I always kept my body and clothing clean,I hated the feeling of filth on me it reminded me of the streets.

We continued galloping until we reached the gates of the castle,it was massive.Oh hell no we'd spend the whole day and night cleaning it,the place looked dirty and in no way shape or form fit for residence.

It was now starting to get dark, it's been a few hours since we arrived and we've been cleaning non-stop.Captain ordered me and Eren to clean the whole the left wing.Eren wouldn't stop talking and all I could do is mentally block him out of my head to keep going with the cleaning.A knock was heard from the door of the room we're now cleaning, a second later captain Levi opened the door and I had to compose myself so I wouldn't laugh.He wore a white bandana over his hair and a fucking mask.Both me and Eren saluted.

"Are you done here?"he asked eyeing the room.

"Not yet captain,we still have a room left but we'll get right to it."said Eren before I could speak,I was still trying to hold my laughter in.

"Eren go start the other room and leave (F/N) to finish this, you'll get it over with more quickly,she will join you when she's done."he ordered and Eren agreed,running off to the next room.

I picked up the rug I was working with on the window and started scrubbing, painfully aware of captain's steely eyes on me.

"I don't know why Erwin picked you to join us."a quiet voice said behind me.

"In all honesty captain neither do I."I said not loosing my temper or turning around,I was familiar with his rude remarks,having heard a lot of soldiers complain about it over the years.I didn't hear anything apart from the door behind me close,leaving me alone.

In what felt years later we were done and heading down to the kitchen to grab some food.I caught Petra by the stairs and we walked down to the kitchen meeting an already seated captain.Petra practically run to the table and I flinched at the noise her shoes made sliding on the rocky floor.

"Captain would you like me to make you some tea?"she asked while I sat two seats away from the head of the table.

"No thank you Petra,I am already aware that you know how to make tea.Cadet (L/N) will make some for all of us."he said looking at me and I returned his gaze slightly nodding.Standing up I made my way to the kettle that was already filled with water,placing it on the stove.A yellow light filled the room and I took the tray with the cups,placing it on the table infront of the captain.When I heard the water bubbling I walked over to the kettle,taking it off the stove and throwing three teabags in it,swirling it around and letting it steep.Minutes later I took the teabags out and held the kettle in my hands.Now back at the table I started with the captain,taking a cup off the tray and placing it near his hand.I could smell his hair from where I was standing,which by the way was kind of behind him and a bit on the left side while pouring tea in his cup.I looked down to him and found him starring sight back to me.

"Do you take it with sugar or milk sir?"I asked keeping the eye contact.He raised his eyebrows.

"No,thank you."I nodded and walked around the table pouring tea to every single one of the special operations squad,Eren and then myself.I could see from the corner of my eye captain holding his cup in a peculiar way,instead of holding it from the handle like a normal fucking person,he holded it from the rim,his palm over the opening.Pouring the last bit of tea to my cup as I sat down I looked at Eren who was talking with Eld,Eld was sitting both on my left and captain's while Oluo was sat at captain's right with Petra next to him on his right .Next to me was Gunter at my right and at the far end of the table was Eren.I drifted off looking down at my cup on the table,my hand wrapped around it when a noise was heard from the kitchen's entrance.It was section commander Hange Zoë.They were supposed to come in tomorrow but I guess they were too excited.

"I was examining two titans we caught alive in the city,I would love for you to help me with tommorrow's experiments.I came here to ask for you permission." they said to Eren.

"An experiment?What am I going to do exactl-" Hange cut him off before he could finish.

"What else except of the amazing thing you already do?"

"Well I can't give you the permission, you see someone else in charge for me."he replied and Hange turned to captain.

"Levi does Eren have to do something tommorrow?"they asked and Captain seemed displeased.

"He has to clean the garden."his reply was short.

"Fine then it's settled!Eren tommorrow we're going to collaborate!"they said taking his hand in theirs.Eren looked overwhelmed.

"Yes."he stuttered."But what kind of experiments to you do with titans?"he asked and their face lit up.

"Uhm,what exactly are this experiments?"he asked once again.Then Oluo spoke.

"Hey stop.Don't ask them this."he said and I looked back at Hange.

"Ah I knew it,your expression have away your desire for knowledge!"the captain suddenly sat up along with everyone else and I did the same.I waved Eren goodbye mouthing <<goodnight>>.I felt kinda bad leaving him there all alone with Hange but he asked for it.As I turned to the left where my assigned room was I was stopped from the captain.

"Since Eren will be accompanying Hange, you'll be cleaning the garden.Understood?"he motioned down infront of the window where an overgrown carden was.I sighed, tommorrow was my day off and I really didn't want to spend it this way.

"I'm sorry captain I'm afraid I can't, tommorrow's my day off."I said respectfully and his jaw clenched.

"I see Erwin hasn't informed you about this,that bastard always leaves the hard work to me."he whispered the last part,almost to himself."Cadet while you're with us here,you will not be having days off."he stated sternly.What?

"What?I never agreed to this."

"You don't need to,these are orders cadet."

"Then I don't want to follow orders."I am not loosing my long awaited day off for this shit.

"You see (F/N), you really don't have a choice so go to sleep and be up at dawn or there'll be consequences, besides it's almost curfew."he swiftly turned around and walked on the opposite direction.Great.

As if his orders were engraved in my mind I really did wake up at dawn.Groaning I dragged myself out of bed and in the bathroom,I doubt anyone will be awake at this time so I didn't bother to change off my nightclothes which consisted of a long white tank top,I noticed that the awaited morning cold had hardened my nipples,and a pair of loose fitting pants.I actually stole these from Reiner,he was about to throw them away anyway because of a rip on the left knee.I sewed it up and now it was my favourite piece of clothing I owned.The cold water run down my body and it waked me up instantly,grabbing the soap bar I scrubbed my hair thoroughly.It smelled like lavender.Finishing up cleansing my body,I run the cold water once a gain to rinse off.I reached for the towel and wrapped it around my body,with my left hand I clenched on the material in order to secure it on my body and on the other hand I had my nightclothes.Walkind down the corridor I shivered,I almost dropped my towel when a dark figure appeared infront of me whilst I made a turn.

"By the walls captain you scared the shit out of me!"I cursed forgetting the ultimately embarrassing situation I was in for a moment.But that moment didn't last long when I remebered my appearance.I felt captain's body tense up under the back of my hand.I was practically stuck on his front so I took a couple of steps back,my face now red from the embarrassment of my captain seeing me like this.I heard him clear his throat and he most probably regained his composure.

"Uh change,have breakfast and go start with the garden.I'll be joining you shortly after I make sure four-eyes doesn't kill Jaeger."he said and I nodded sprinting to my room.Unaware of the pair of bright brown eyes that just saw my entire encounter with captain.

Quickly I pulled on my chest wrappings,underpants and a white shirt with my military trousers.I didn't have to wear the harnesses today so I ditched them in the chair near my bed and I laced up my leather boots.I combed my wet hair with my fingers,they fell just bellow my shoulders in a middle part.The kitchen was empty but it looks like someone has already brewed some tea and there's porridge on the stove.I ate quickly,drinking my tea in a hurry and I left the kitchen.The garden was peaceful but also chaotic.It was so overgrown with weeds and it desperately needed organisation,the stone path was also cover in moss.I picked up the water/vinegar solution and a scrubber.I started working on the stone pavement,getting the moss off.

Some time later it was finally finished,the sun now brightly above my head.A few drops of sweat run down my forehead,my hand willing them off in an instant.

"Oi cadet!How is it going?"captain's voice said.

"So now you join me? It's been surely hours!"just breathe (F/N) don't let your anger take over you.He seemed to catch on my anger even though I tried my best to cover it.I felt a harsh grip on my chin,tilting it up where I met his cold eyes.I was still on my knees and his force hold didn't help.

"Why are you complaining cadet?I already told you I'd be joining you when it was possible."

"Couldn't you have joined me earlier,it surely wouldn't take you more than a few minutes to ensure Eren's safety."I spat at him.

"Now brat even if I didn't join you,you still would have to finish this garden.It's orders."he said releasing my chin from his grasp.My eyes shot daggers at him,only if he weren't my boss..."Anyways I'll help you finish so we can start training."he finished.Training?

"Training?Why?"I asked

"Because." he replied and began to pull on weeds from the garden.What an asshole.Having no other option I did too and almost an hour later we were done.

"Four-eyes must have finished now,I'll get the others,you though should wear your gear."

Truly in about a quarter of a clock we were standing all together for training.Apparently Eren didn't have any progress in transforming,now with a bangdaged hand.

"Warm up, we're doing hand to hand combat today.I'm pretty sure you know it isn't as important with titans but as a soldier you won't have to face only those.Hand to hand combat is something you should rely on when times get tough."said captain."Petra you're with Eren,Gunther you're with Oluo and (F/N) you're with me,I want to test your abilities."he finished,I suppose Eld was helping Hange with something.

Everyone got in a line,captain in front of me.I made sure to keep my ground while he was just there waiting for me to do something.I could hear everyone else grunting while they fought with eachother,yet me and Captain we're not rushing ourselves, circling around each other.

"Aren't you going to make a move on me captain?Afraid aren't we?"I said with a smirk and he scoffed.

"It's not my fucking skills that are being tested (F/N) so just start."he did have a point so with all my strength I went in with my right fist straight to his face,I already knew he'd avoid it so the moment he did I tripped him using my leg.He did however notice and he wasn't about to fall down,at least without me.His right hand grabbed my waist and I fell on top of him with a whelp.In my state of surprise he took both of my wrists,rolling over on my body pinning them over my head.I grunted,his smug face inches from my own,he really did have beautiful eyes.It looked as if I was defeated but I had another trick up my sleeve.Due to my years spent in the streets I had to learn how to adapt so I learnt how to slide over stuff,making me very flexible.Carefully, without him noticing I lifted my right foot from under him and brought it over his left side,me now rolling over him,in his now surprised state his grip on my hands loosened.I retrieved full control of my wrists so I yanked them off his palms completely.I grabbed each one of his hands and pinned them to his sides,now sitting on top of his waist.

"Shorty has lost finally!" a voice said,Hange.

"Tsk,you win cadet,now get off me."I did exactly as he said.He walked back into the castle after dismissing us.

"Oh my god (F/N)!Captain hasn't lost in hand to hand combat,like never!"Petra walked over to me.

"Really?"woah."Well there's a first for everyone,now let's go to eat I'm fucking starving."

After I showered and changed again,fucking Levi had to choose hand to hand combat the day I showered,I went to the kitchen to eat with the others,everyone was already in there eating.I joined in the conversation with Oluo about how wall Rose has little to no supplies left while eating.It wasn't so bad here after all...

Since Hange was joining us we had to add an other chair,with us moving around I ended up to the captain's left,a bit closer than I would have liked.I looked at Oluo across from me and flashed him small smile.After we finished I joined Hange to their laboratory,them explaining me what happened today,Eren and the others will experiment more in the evening.They asked me if I wanted to join them but I said no,I wanted to relax for the rest of the day,maybe read some more pages of my book.It was about a girl who was helplessly in love with someone she couldn't have,it was more of a diary to be honest.It tugged painfully on the strings of my heart for a reason.

"(F/N) I'm going to need your help in the library once four-eyes is gone."captain said opening the door of my room and I screeched.

"Captain what are you doing?I could have been bare!"who even does that?

"Nothing I haven't seen before now in about an hour I need you in the library, we're going to organise the books in alphabetical order and dust the shelves."I groaned but hid it with a cough.

"Yes captain."he nodded and left,as soon as he did I fell on my bed cursing at him.

It is now almost night,me and Levi have took out all the books off the selves.We are dusting the inside of the selves but I can't quite reach the top.Being 4'11 at eighteen isn't enjoyable,even the military's shorty is taller than you.

"What's wrong?"he asked,he must have saw me struggling to reach the top shelf on my tiptoes.

"It's nothing sir, it's just that I can't reach the top shelf don't worry though I'll just get on top of a chair."shrugging it off I started walking towards the end of the room where a stack of chairs was placed.

"Don't you dare step on a clean chair with your shoes.I'll just lift you."he said gabbing my waist with both hands and placing me on his right shoulder so easily,as if I weighted nothing.God how was he able to do it? Military training,the guy's probably shredded.No don't think about his body right now what the fuck.

"Uh alright,can you go to the left and as I clean move to the right?"I felt his head nod on the outside of my left thigh and I started moving.When I finished I felt the weight under me gone and in a matter of seconds I was on the ground with a big thud.

"What the fuck captain why'd you do that?"I said while getting up.

"Revenge for this morning."he walked off and towards the door.

"Asshole..."I said quietly to myself,or I thought so.

"What did you say?"fuck fuck fuck.

"Nothing sir."I replied my face getting red.

"Look cadet I don't know who you think you are but addressing your superiors like this is unacceptable."his words came off aggressively but his face stayed stone cold.

"Well I'm sorry but what am I supposed to say to someone who won't accept their defeat because they think they're so damn unbeatable?"I snapped and in seconds I was pinned to the wall next to the selves.

"This is the last time I'll go easy on you brat, I'm your captain and I demand respect."venom dripping from his words,his hands tugging hardly on my jaw.

"I only show respect when I know it'll be returned and with all honesty sir you've been quite an asshole to me today." I smirked and I felt a hand slap my cheek,not hard but enough to make me angry.

"What the fuck did you just say?"his eyes burning into mine.

"What the did you just do?"I bit back wiggling my way off his grasp,pushing him down with all my strength.I was on top of him now just like in training this morning.

He reached out to turn me around with his hands but I took them both and locked them behind my back.I knew I'd regret this later,but I was so damn mad.

"Cadet get off me right now and I'm willing to forget what happened today."he said scowling.

"There's no way in hell I'm doing that until you apologize for being an asshole."I replied smugly.He must've not liked that because next thing I knew I was under him,his nose grazing mine.I could feel his laboured breathing on my lips and a thought flashed in my mind.As soon as it did I pushed it away.

"Let me go!"my voice trembled from both fear and fury.His hand had clutched both my wrists in a tight grip,his other hand under my chin tilting it up so I wouldn't miss his eyes.I felt the steely gaze piercing through my (e/c) one.Without thinking I subconsciously looked down on his panting lips and returned my gaze back to his.His eyebrows slightly raised,his eyes now we're traveling down to my panting lips.I knew what was bound to happen any second right now.He slightly shifted, softening his grip on my wrists,his straight nose moved on top of mine,a ghost of a kiss lingered millimeters above my mouth.I closed my eyes waiting for him to lock our lips but that moment never came,on the contrary I heard a sound of steps nearing the door.Captain quickly rose to his feet,pulling me up with him.

"(F/N)! Captain!"Eren exclaimed.He seemed quite disappointed,I wondered if he failed again.

"Jaeger help (L/N) finish organising the books."he ordered and left the room.

Putting the books back in the shelves a realisation came upon me.He wanted to kiss me,and I was to kiss him back.

Dinner approached and everyone was in the kitchen eating except captain.

"Hey Petra do you know where captain is?"Gunther asked and she shrugged.

"He seemed angry so I don't know,he might not want to eat tonight."

"Why would he be angry though?"

"I don't know but (F/N) you were with him right?Did you guys fight?" Eren interrupted and I wanted to throw my spoon at him.We were great friends but he just doesn't know when to shut the fuck up.All eyes on me now.

"Well we did kind of have a disagreement." I said looking at my plate."It's okay I, I'll get him some tea and apologize."they all seemed content with my reply.

The tray wobbled in my hands,I reached his temporary office.Knocking twice I heard a voice behind the door say <<come in>> and so I did.

His gaze didn't falter when I stepped in,walking in a straight line after closing the door,I placed the tray on the desk before him.

"Sir,I would like to apologize for today's incident,I shouldn't have been disrespectful to you and I definitely do not want to be the reason you don't get to enjoy this evening with your comrades."I said and the bastard laughed.He laughed.I've never seen him laugh.That's when I noticed a bottle of dark liquid on the corner of the window behind him.

"Cut the bullshit (F/N) we both know you don't feel sorry for anything that happened today."he said,now I understand,his laugh was a mocking one.I mean he wasn't wrong,I only said that to avoid punishment.He sighed and motioned for me to get to the left side behind the desk so I did.Standing up from his seat,his palm cupped the side of my neck,bringing us closer.He didn't get to do anything else though because I took his face between my hands and pressed our lips together.I sighed into the kiss.He kissed me back,forcefully,teeth grazing my lips.Bevuase of my surprised state of teeth on my lips he took the opportunity to lift me up from my waist,sitting me on top of the desk and slipped his tongue in my mouth.He grunted when my hands left his face and went straight on his hair,running my fingertips over his undercut and tugging at the longer hair on top of it.Humming I slowly tore my lips from his,placing small kissed from his chin to his jaw where I traveled down to his neck,leaving opened mouthed kisses all around until I reached the collar of his shirt.My hands trembled while I unbuttoned the first three buttons off his shirt,moving the collar out of the way I attached my lips on the base of his neck,where it connected with his torso and sucked on the skin,slightly biting it.I was no strangers to lovebites.He sucked in a breathe.

"Fuuuuck." a throaty moan came out of him.I smiled to myself and continued with my work,leaving a few more marks to spots I knew his clothing would cover up.As I pulled away from his torso,I looked up at him.His eyes were full of lust,just like mine.I smiled devilishly at him,kissing him once again.We left the office discreetly and he led me to his room locking the door,pinning me against it.

"After all I don't think you mind discipline."Oh boy.

Streaks of blinding gold twinkled over my eyes the following morning.My face twisted,turning around I let my hand touch the bedding but instead it hooked over a hard surface.Then it hit me.Shit,shit,shit.Last night me...and captain...my eyes widened.Red faced me looked up,captain was sleeping with his hands under my waist.Moments of yesterday's interaction flew through my mind when I heard a groan leave his red lips.His hands tightened around my waist bringing me on top of him.That's when his eyes opened up and found my head in the crook of his neck.The muscles of his stomach tensed up.I rose up using the sheet to cover my chest.

"Uh goodmorning captain?"I said unsure of what to say.He grabbed my nape and forced me on his hard chest once more.

"Shut the fuck up."so he didn't want to talk about yesterday,okay he's saving me the embarrassment.His fingers combed through my hair and I hummed kissing the surface of his chest.He tilted my head up by my hair,I felt something harden against my thigh.Morning sex?Count me in.

When I was about to make a move someone knocked on captain's door.Panicking I pulled away and covered myself in the sheets leaving him naked.

"Captain it's almost nine in the morning,how come you haven't gotten up yet?"Petra.

"I have a headache Petra,I'll come down once the painkiller (L/N) gave me starts working."he replied.

"Oh,I'm sorry to hear that sir.I'll go and make you some tea."her steps became less and less loud until they were completely gone.

I covered him with the sheets and started putting on my clothes.After everything was on I turned to the captain.

"I better get going,see you later captain."I smiled and he nodded.Opening the door and making sure no one was around I returned to my room.Now what the fuck was all this?

#leviackerman #levi #aot #eren #levixreader #attackontitan #snk #erwinsmith #hangezoe #xreader #romance #fanfiction

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rainbowrider1290 · 3 years

Text

My take on a Genshin Impact Circus AU Part 4 with Noelle as a strongwoman and Amber as a death-defying archery stuntwoman. Their backstories are under the cut!

Noelle:

First off I have a very self-indulgent headcanon that she is ridiculously strong. Like. Can benchpress people. Canonverse or AU.

She used to help out around the circus and she was kind of indifferent to the fact that she was likely going to be a maid. It's a respectable profession. And helping out at her childhood friends' (Kaeya and Diluc) manor as she'd been born into doing seemed like a good job.

How she got into the circus life requires a bit of backstory. Back when they were kids, Kaeya, Diluc, and Noelle would mess around (as kids do) and have little challenges for themselves. Who can run the fastest, who can do the best cartwheel, who can jump the highest, and the like.

Noelle got a little hesitant as she got into her early teens bc she was always told to be ladylike, so she spent one or two of their hangout sessions watching Kaeya and Diluc and talking. One day, however, Kaeya and Diluc are being Teenage Boys and lifting heavy things trying to outlift each other. Noelle has lifted furniture when cleaning up after these two so she figures this one unladylike thing would be okay.

She comes up behind them and just. Picks them both up. On top of the things they were lifting already. Kaeya and Diluc have to take a second and just look at her like "yeah no you are never sitting out of our competitions again"

And so they try other things like cartwheels and tests of courage like who can climb the highest on a tree and things are back to normal.

Skip forward a few years and Crepus dies. There's a huge mystery around it that not even his son's attendants are privy to. The only thing people know is that the sons have been sent away to boarding school. The whole manor is abandoned, all the workers fired.

Noelle for the next few years spends her time working at laundromats, and other odd jobs, but eventually she runs out of luck and suddenly there's too many people and not enough opportunities.

One of her friends from one of her old jobs invites her to go out and see this new circus that happens to be in town. She goes because why not. And wouldn't you know it one of the acts is her childhood friends doing these death-defying stunts that hit her with a wave of nostalgia bc their entire act consists of essentially the song "anything you can do" but with more and more dangerous stunts.

Noelle of course has to say hi, so they catch up and Noelle's lack of work comes up and would you look at that Aether and Lumine happen to have an opening for a maid.

So Noelle settles in, continuing to lift heavy shit to clean under it (Bennett swears up and down he saw her lift a fridge once but he might've been sleep-deprived). She also got into helping Chongyun with the techy stuff so sometimes she'll be at tech rehearsals moving things around and one time a rope holding up a person breaks near Noelle and she. catches it.

Now, one night. One of the acts drops out at the last moment bc injury or last-minute commitment or the like. And it leaves a gap in the show. Everyone else is busy. And panicking bc the circus is still relatively new and they really need to build their rep rn.

They start wondering what kind of last-minute acts they can put together like "what about the gymnasts??" "They all have group routines" "do they have old routines??" "Not polished enough for what we need" and someone somewhere pipes up "man I wish we had a strongman or something" and Diluc and Kaeya immediately whip their heads around to look at each other for like half a second before Kaeya bolts. He finds Noelle doing her usual rounds she's been doing for like a month now and Bennett was right, she is currently under a mini-fridge that she is lifting over her head whilst leaning it against a wall.

Kaeya takes Noelle by the shoulders and just zooms her over to where the commotion is happening and pitches the idea to Aether and Lumine. They're hesitant as hECK bc this is a huge risk they're taking since Noelle isn't even a performer but Diluc pitches that they could literally just scatter really heavy items and have Noelle clean under them and as long as she looks at the audience every once in a while it can be played off as a bit.

Noelle with qUITE the stammer says that she'll try her best but at this time is in need of a moment. She has never performed before. Kaeya and Diluc have to go perform so they leave her with a shoulder squeeze and a thumbs up.

She gets on-stage. She flinches under the lights for a second. She takes a deep breath and focuses on the first thing before her with her best "oh heavens, it's filthy in here", and she gets through the entire act by doing that for every object. So the audience is seeing this seemingly petite young girl lift the equivalent of a hecking car in order to clean under it.

Needless to say, there's roaring applause the second Noelle leaves (which she hears from far away because holy shit I just cleaned for people and they liked it)

This was a bit of a one-time thing and she goes back to her regular maid duties until the circus gets a new strongman by the name "Zhongli".

His style is more about lifting exTREMELY LARGE ROCKS, and breaking them in half whilst giving a history/geology lesson on them.

He quietly observes the maid who he hears fantastical stories of That One Time She Charmed An Audience By Cleaning. He was bewildered at first but saw the merit of it while watching her clean. He immediately decides that this girl has sO MUCH. POTENTIAL that is being wasted by having her work as a maid. He has nothing against maids or their profession, but he invites her to train with him.

Noelle gets hELLA stronger and they come to a conclusion. Noelle performs part-time and is a maid part-time. She doesn't have a particular performance style. She'll sometimes play catch with Zhongli and his big rocks, other times she'll be in the background of performers like Amber in the art lifting some hEAVY SHIT.

She gets along with Chongyun super well bc Chongyun has to make less trips to move his equipment since he's worked with her. She's a blessing for when they have to pack up and move.

Amber:

Amber's story is a little more straightforward. She started out engaged to a suitor. Amber was the kid in kindergarten who was learning about dragons and "idk what everyone else was doing". She's known what she wants for a long time, and what she wants at the moment, is not a relationship.

Throughout her childhood she was a very lonely child. Her family exposed her to lots of academic or ladylike things (do not ask me when this au is set, it's the 1800s and the 1990s at the same time or a suspendes steampunk time) to get her away from the thing she liked most: archery. She'd been exposed to it as a kid and latched on.

This drove a bunch of suitors away, so her family got more desperate and exposed her to more classes and activities to get her away from it. She went "that's easy, I'll just practice at night"

So she does that. She practices at night and underperforms in the coming weeks. It is during this time that her parents (high class ppl) find her a man to marry for some business deal idk.

The man's nice enough. It's just obvious he can only take Amber in small doses, and Amber takes full advantage of this to practice and stay in shape.

How Amber gets into the circus life was essentially running away. She bonds with Eula over this.

So because of all the attempts to make her fit into the ideal lady description, her rebellious streak said "yeah we're going to go as far away from that as possible" and she goes "I'm going to run away with the circus" bc that's what the books she's read say is the most rebellious thing you can do.

She finds THE FIRST circus she sees and begs to be let in. This is the shadiest most sketchy place but Amber sees it as the key to her freedom. She signs a contract.

They treat her like the US treats their students. She barely gets time to practice for performances and she's mostly doing dirty work. When they ask her what she can do she's like "I'm really good at archery" and they go "cool, you're going to be doing that while everything is on fire now. Can you do a handstand"

Essentially they push her and push her and push her to do more and more hazardous things she has to pick up on under the threat of being kicked to the curb.

After a while of this Amber is extremely burned out (pun intended) and as she's packing up after one of her shows, covered in burns but proud bc she hit all her targets without killing anyone, she's approached by a blond foreigner.

Tbh for all she's read, Amber really doesn't consider leaving and this time she can't run away since she's now bound by a contract (not Zhongli's btw in case anyone was wondering).

This foreigner tells her that there's so many ways to improve her situation and that he runs a circus looking for members.

Amber refuses since she's not getting tangled up in another legal mess, but she takes his advice on how to take care of her burns, and improve safety while she's performing.

Skip a few months. She hears word of this mysterious new circus around. Her encounter with who she'll later know as Aether stuck with her, and so she goes. To see whether she could really shoot her arrows without being burned alive.

After a show one night, she tries to get past security and fails repeatedly. She turns to leave and wouldn't you know it there's Aether. And Lumine. Waiting for her once she turns the corner. Amber's biggest concern is her existing contract and when Aether and Lumine say they have a nICE lawyer, Amber sees her next step to freedom.

Aether and Lumine essentially gain custody of Amber (but like for adults) and Amber is. Shocked. She's walked through her new contract of employment clearly and essentially treated like a human being.

And now that she knows things and has more freedom (though still under the watchful eyes of Aether and Lumine to see how she does) her creativity and competitive streak flourish. She decides she actually doesn't hate fire, she just doesn't like when she doesn't know when or where it's coming. And she makes fast friends with the gymnasts, so she ends up incorporating that into her routines. Now she uses her canon goggles to protect her from the burning eyes of prolonged smoke exposure when she uses fire.

When she meets a little pyromanic girl named Klee, she's thrilled that someone this chaotic and sure of herself exists.

#genshin impact #genshin #genshin impact noelle #genshin impact amber #genshin amber #genshin noelle #genshin impact circus au #genshin circus au #circus au #genshin impact fan art #genshin impact fanart #genshin fanart #genshin fan art #genshin noelle fanart #genshin amber fanart #genshin impact headcanons #genshin amber headcanons #genshin noelle headcanons #my art

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aquarianlights · 3 years

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I am in a serious financial bind. 😥 If anyone is in a position to listen & help or signal boost, pls keep reading...

This is from my apartment complex. I am in low-income housing. I called them & sent them proof I could pay on the 23rd. I told them I could (just barely) put 100 down now & they said that was too little.

They said they would file for eviction on the 16th, which adds $150 to my rent. They will cancel the court date and eviction on the 23rd when I pay.

But that doesn't cancel the $150 filing fee.

Idk where that $150 would come from. Idky they think it's fair that someone who cannot pay should be forced to pay even more??? That makes no sense. I can only just barely afford my rent every month as is.

These are from my energy company. I apparently owe them over $600. I genuinely do not know how this happened. We were on the phone for a very long time trying to figure it out & I was in tears for the latter portion of it because I swear I paid.

I usually keep record of my payments via taking a picture of my receipt since they are electronic, but my dog chewed up my phone (which I have pics of if need be for evidence) and broke it, so I had to get a replacement phone sent to me from the insurance company & nothing transferred from the old phone, so all my pics were wiped.

I found no record in my emails, either.

The meds I am taking to try to go into remission and the autoimmune disease itself both cause brain fog and issues with time warping, so it is possible maybe I skipped a month or something, but I highly doubt I would have skipped up to 600+ dollars worth of payments.

I have tons of electronic and hard copy calendars & they are all synced and constantly updated so that I know when payments are due. I also have text and email reminders sent to me, but I could find no reminders in my email for MONTHS now until they were telling me they were going to shut my power off if I didn't pay this. Idk why I was not sent reminders for months???

In the end, I agreed to set up a payment plan. Paying, like... 50-60ish on top of whatever my electric bill is every month for 12 months. It was the lowest they could go.

I can barely afford my electric bill as it is, so idk how I will be able to do this? They did give me a list of charities in my area so I will be using what little energy I have to call around & see if any of them would be willing to help me pay this. Idk how those work (they're mostly churches???), so I'm just gonna try & see what happens. 🤔

On top of all that, I *think* this is telling me my Medicaid has been cancelled but I'm not 100% sure?????

I'm going through treatment for a very serious, disabling problem that should last ~1 year and rn Medicaid is picking up what my Medicare doesn't cover and some of my doctors/specialists and treatments are medicaid only.

If I lose this, I'm basically done.

I know they'll do backpay if I get it back, but Idk if I *will* get it back. I'll be trying to get it back, but in the meantime, I guess I'll just have to pay out of pocket, idk??? Which I do not have.

I have lost almost ALL autonomy due to this autoimmune disease, which (in a very simplified form) is basically my immune cells "eating" my muscle tissue. I can barely get out of bed. Treatment should put me in remission & give me my life back. I am seeing a rheumatologist, neurologist, dermatologist, PCP, physical therapist, psychiatrist, psychologist, and going to a holistic pain treatment center that does a different kind of physical therapy to bring down pain levels (which I was put into that program by my rheum). All of these are in relation to & necessary for my disease. I am going through TONS of testing almost weekly now & trying out treatments like IVIG and chemo where I am in the hospital hooked up to an IV for 4-6+ hrs of that day and the cost of those things without Medicaid picking up what Medicare doesn't cover is astronomical. I have to sign waivers every time I get my blood drawn (which is almost weekly now), do tests, and do treatments saying I will pay if Medicaid does not pick up the extra.

I already have crippling medical debt; I don't need more. I'm scared they won't let me do any more tests or treatments if they see I am just letting it all go to collections & am not paying.

This could mean the difference between having a life worth living (to me) where I am happy & thriving & autonomous or being bed-bound & living a life of just existing from day to day & miserable & in pain & suffering & unable to do anything for myself. This is literally life and death for me because I wouldn't be able to handle continuing to live in the latter scenario. I cannot handle living like I am now. Knowing my treatments are progressing is what keeps me going. Knowing I can go into remission is what keeps me going. Knowing my future is one completely different from now is what keeps me going. But if I cannot have that and am destined to live in this current state, it's just not worth it. I don't know a person alive who would want to live like this.

Finally, my anger noodle needs to get to the vet for MULTIPLE things. Nothing is, like... life threatening or super immediate like his cancer was last year, but they're things that need to be addressed in terms of preventative care & to make sure he isn't in pain.

He needs his trachea checked, possibly x-rays for that, maybe more...

He needs some medication updates, needs a physical, needs a full groom & nail clip under anesthesia (for those who are not familiar with Echo, he has extreme fear-based aggression & usually gets this done under anesthesia; since I worked with him so much, he had his first non-anesthesia nail clip at the beginning of quarantine, but he has gotten worse during quarantine & with my muscle eating disease, I can no longer restrain him & don't have the physical strength to run a brush through his thicker fur as his winter coat is in, so I can no longer groom certain areas of him at home, so his tummy & back legs are matted & I fear he may need to be shaved... which breaks my heart since you don't shave double coat dogs unless medically necessary.), he needs a full physical, & needs to be checked over for MCT's.

He may also need a fecal test or something else, as he has been having odd bowel movements. 😥 His tummy has been upset lately.

I have been crying myself to sleep every single night & often during the day because I cannot get him to the vet. No, it isn't urgent or life threatening. But he is reverse sneezing more than normal & I worry about tracheal collapse, which is a common small dog thing & even MORE common in pomeranians specifically. Every time he has a fit, I think "Oh god, this is it. This is the time I'm gonna have to rush him to the e-vet & get slammed with a huge bill & he is not gonna be okay..."

It breaks my heart to see his legs & belly matted. He is horrible about letting me groom him coz of his aggression so he only gets a full grooms at the vet, but I do short grooming sessions at home with him nightly. Takes about 2 hours just to do the majority of one side of him (not even all of it; just most) coz he needs breaks & lots of praise every few strokes or he will tear me to shreds & hurt himself snapping on the undercoat rake. 😥

But now that my autoimmune disease has atrophied my muscles to the point holding up my phone without something to prop it up feels like I am lifting weights & tires my arms out with a lactic acid burn & pain, I can no longer groom him with the patience he needs & can only groom in 20 minute intervals at the VERY longest. By the time I have gotten one leg done during the week, his entire other side is matted. 😞 Matting on dogs---especially double coat dogs---hurts them. It's like if someone were to wrap your hair around their fingers & then pull it taut. It's a constant pulling pressure on their skin... it's painful & irritates the epidermis. I feel miserable feeling the matting on his back legs & tummy & now feeling the mats beginning to form on the rest of him. He hates me working them out, even with the detangling spray. I know it must hurt so much...

So he may need to be shaved at this point & that will destroy me. I feel sick thinking about it. But anything to get him out of pain. Maybe it is what's best for him while I go through this year of treatment & get my muscles back. But in order to do that, I need to get him to the vet.

The stress of not being able to get him to a vet is tearing me apart & literally making me physically ill.

He is my world. My everything. My #1. My heart dog. My priority in life. My entire universe revolves around him. I would do anything for him. Not a single person, animal, thing, etc, comes before him. It is KILLING me that I cannot provide proper care for him right now. I always always always make sure to sacrifice for him if need be & his things ALWAYS come first, even if it means I'm not eating or not paying bills or whatever. As long as he is taken care of & his needs & wants are met, nothing else matters to me. And right now........ I feel he is suffering because of my finances & the fact my treatment with building my muscles up is not going fast enough.

I cannot control the latter one, but the first one is something I can at least ask for help for. So that is what I am doing.

If anyone is in a place to help, these are my venmo & cashapp codes. I also have paypal.

💙 Venmo: @kqroswell

💚 Cashapp: $kqroswell

💜 Paypal: @kqroswell or [email protected]

If there is another form of payment you're thinking of, lemme know. I also have fb pay activated if you have me on FB (Killian Q Roswell).

Thank you to everyone who read through this & anyone who can help or reblog this. 💖

Sincerely,

Your v scared, struggling transman who really wants his bills/rent paid & his dog to go to the vet,

Killian 💞

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nancypullen · 2 months

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What Day Is It?

Thought I'd drop in and let everyone know I'm still kicking. I'm really liking my job but really hating the long hours. I worked until 8 o'clock last night and it nearly killed this old lady. The people that I work with are exceptionally nice, the work itself is interesting and there's never a dull moment, and the paycheck is tasty. If I didn't have to be on my feet most the day it would be darn near perfect (or if my days were just shorter). I shelved books from noon to 3 o'clock yesterday, then hauled stuff in from the outdoor book drop and checked it all in, pulled books that people put on hold, worked the circulation desk and helped people with copying, printing, etc then (hallelujah!) I got to spend a couple of hours in my favorite part of the library. Tucked away from the hustle and bustle, it's the sweetest room and has the best light.

youtube

The children's room! I made that little video during a lull in the action, it didn't last long. Every time I get to work in this room I find more wonderful books to check out for the grandgirl's next visit. I've got a stack. Those zippered kits on the shelves are wonderful, they're for parents to check out and they're filled with children's books on topics like potty training or welcoming a new sibling. Some include games and puzzles. They get a lot of action. I've inherited a job from a lovely gal who is leaving to pursue a career in architecture so I get to do all of the library displays. You know that doesn't break my heart. Before leaving she prepared stuff for March and pulled the books, so my ideas will start in April. I'm already working on puffy clouds with strings of raindrops falling from them and a banner that says APRIL SHOWERS. Underneath will be a sign that says:

surrounded by the books and right in front a big box of Kleenex. April is also National Poetry Month so of course I'll have a display for that, but I'm also planning a display of gardening books with this sign.

I know, I'm corny. I don't care. I'll probably make one change to the plans for her March displays because March is Women's History Month and you know I can't let that go without recognition. I'll just make a pink banner that says Women's History Month and I slapped this together.

I've got a list of books to pull - everything from Wild Women of Maryland to books on female codebreakers, fashion icons, spies, inventors, authors, politicians, and all sorts of biographies. I'm not kidding when I say that I'm really enjoying the job, but it might kill me. Because there is a lot of lifting, and I'm on my feet most of the day, my sciatica is raging. It ticks me off because I spent months doing telehealth PT and starting my day with stretches and being ever so careful, and it worked. I was able to beat it down to a dullness that allowed me to do pretty much anything I wanted. Now I want to cry by the end of the night. Ugh. Because I work with such youngsters I keep it to myself. They wouldn't get it. I'm also not going to ask anyone to do anything for me. Either I can pull my weight or I can't. I'm really, really hoping it gets better. I do wish that I was a bit more part-time. I'm embarrassed that it's even an issue for me, but it is what it is. All I can do is keep going and see what happens, right? Every night when I try not to limp to my car I swear I'm quitting. Then I think of the nice people I work with, the fun kids in the children's room, the interesting questions when I'm at the information desk (that's a whole blog post) and decide to take a handful of ibuprofen and try again. Speaking of walking to my car at night...funny story about my car. I mentioned that the Edgewaters were buying a new vehicle so we bought one of their cars. I just needed something small and fuel efficient to get to work and back (the library is less than a mile from our house, I should probably walk) and to have when Mickey is out and about taking photos. Anyyyyway, I always buy a decal to place on my back window. It's easy to spot in a parking lot and it's also just cute. You know I'll decorate anything. I usually choose a bright peace sign - simple, and as I said, easy to spot. Normally it's just this.

But this time I found a version I liked more, so I stuck it on there.

I was super happy with it until a someone asked why I had a Playboy bunny on my car.

Me, a 60 year old granny who works in a library...were they serious??? They were serious. Surely that's not what the rest of this town thinks. They must be so disappointed when I get out of my car in my comfy shoes and stretchy pants. Oh well, that's all from me tonight. Just wanted to pop in and assure you that I haven't made a run for the border or thrown myself into the Chesapeake Bay. I'm still plugging along traying to find the best in every day. It's always there. There's a bubble bath calling me and a couple of cats that want to snuggle. Rumor has it that there's snow on the way tonight and I'm hoping to wake up to a blanket of white. Cross your fingers! Sending out lots of love tonight. Take as much as you need and pass it on. Stay safe, stay well, stay warm. XOXO, Nancy

#Youtube

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ladywinterwitch · 4 years

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Run Away (Eight- What You Gotta Do)

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Avenger! Reader

Summary: You and Steve complete each other. Your love is that strong and devoted kind of love that pushes people to things like marriage, making a family. You couldn't imagine that a baby would be something you really wished, until the possibility wasn't your choice anymore.

Warnings: A bit of angst, pregnancy talk, mentions of injuries, mentions of abandonement (mild), fluff, reader is still an emotional rollercoaster, cursing and swearing, smut, unprotected sex (too late for these two lmao), oral sex (f recieving), brief mentions of body insicurities, Bucky’s a puppy dog.

Words Count: 5289

A/n: Part eight! I can’t believe that I’ve actually come this far lmao. Plus, me posting stuff with less than 44827 years of distance with each other? A miracle. I always said that I would wrap it up at 10 chapters,but while writing this chapter I realized that I will need one or two extra chapters + the epilogue. We’ll see. For now I’m happy to be able to write lol. Series masterlist here, main masterlist here. Enjoy <3

ps: Chris’s look in that gif,,,chile

(gif not mine)

In the following week you saw Steve once a day, just to assure that he was doing fine. He wasn' sleeping in your shared room for the moment, but in a spare bedroom. You knew that you were probably being harsh with him, but you were so mad. It wasn't the first time that he did something stupid to try and save others. Hell, just think about that damned plane crash that put him in the ice in the first place.

You understood the reasons why, and basically everyone tried to talk with you and kinda 'sugar coat it' but the issue wasn't that you didn't understand: the issue was that he couldn't afford to think only about himself. Was it selfish on your behalf to think that way? Maybe. But you couldn't help it. You told yourself that it would've been different if you were just married, or just lovers. His decisions would've still been his. But now it's different. In less than six months he would've become a father. And that comes with responsibility. Wasn't he the first to tell you how important it was for you to put aside your job, for months or maybe even forever, just for the wellbeing of the creature inside you? That kid is yours just as much as he's his.

You and Bucky went out for a shopping trip that afternon. You would've asked Wanda, but she and Vision went to Clint's farm for a few days to see him and his family. Steve still had to be inside the tower, since he wasn't fully healed yet. You knew that he was watching a football game with Sam now, while Tony and Bruce were working on a new project, and Thor went to Asgard for a while to go check that Loki and Odin weren't at each other's throats.

You didn't mind Bucky's company at all. And in any case it wasn't like you felt like going out with Steve, not just yet. The brunette drove you both to the mall where he parked and then you went inside.

-So, what absolutely exciting and girly shops I have to visit today?- he asked while you curled your hand around his bicep. You laughed, looking up at him while you walked.

-Well, this mama is getting bigger every day, so I really can't wear my old clothes. I wouldn't even fit in them, and I can't go on with you guys' hoodies and t-shirts. I mean, I'm still a woman. Who said I can't look good while pregnant?- you responded, dragging him to a maternity clothes shop. As soon as you entered like half of the women in the shop turned to look at Bucky. You glanced at him and saw that he blushed and was looking everywhere except them. You bit you lip to not smile while you started to look around at the clothes. You made sure to engage in conversations with him to try and take the attention away.

-Damn homie, I think you just made those women regret their partners.- you said lowly so only he could hear you, and being a super enhanced supersolier, he did hear you very clearly. He snapped his head towards you with a look of disbelief on his face. His expression was so funny that you couldn't help but laugh. He looked around quickly then got closer to you.

-Stop it! It's already embarassing without you pointing it out.- he whined with a low voice. You stopped laughing but you couldn't help but smile, pressing your lips together.

-It's just so funny to me, because I understand these women. Turns out that pregnancy doesn't only make you sick, but also terribly horny.- you rose an eyebrow and he face palmed himself. You laughed again.

-Too much information, doll.- he groaned. You chuckled, putting in his hands a bunch of clothes. He caught them with both arms and followed you like a puppy to the changing rooms.

-Thank you kind sir, now I'm gonna see if they fit then I promise we're out of here.- you joked, hanging the clothes into the changing room. You closed the tent and he let himself fall delicately on one of the couches. He looked around while he waited but it turned out to be a bad idea when he saw the women from the various isles and even the shop's staff looking at him. He awkwardly smiled and then looked back at the closed changing room, sinking in his seat and covering the side of his face with a hand nonchalantly. He heard a few muffled giggles but no ne bothered him.

-Y/n are you done?- he asked, more embarassed than anything. Suddenly she pulled back the tent and started to gather a few of the garments in her hand. Bucky's gaze got caught on her figure. It was essentially the first time that she wore something fitting and not exaggerately large, so her belly was fully on display, even more so since she was turned to the side. The man felt a mix of emotions all at once and didn't quite catch the first time she called him.

-Buck, did you hear me?- he snapped out of it and stood to his feet, blinking a few times.

-It looks great.- he commented. You had on a nice flowery minidress, the sleeves were short and puffy, the square neckline showed just enough cleavage to remain classy, the breast area was tight but just below the skirt was soft and fell perfectly on your figure, showing the belly. You looked at him with a smile, chuckling slightly.

-Yeah, it fits well doesn't it? I'm getting these,- he gave a three dresses, two shirts, two t-shirts, two pairs of jeans and a pencil skirt to him, while she had other stuff in her own hands. -And I'm leaving these.- she sighed.

-Would you do me a favor? I'm dropping these off, meanwhile could you go to the pay desk? I'll be there in a sec.- he nodded and you thanked him while you walked away to the isles. Bucky walked towards the counter and dropped the garments on the desk, giving a quick smile to the girl behind it. He pulled out from the back pocket of his jeans the wallet and then the credit card, which was obviously Tony's, and put it on the glass above the counter. He waited a few seconds until the clerk, which was a nice girl with black hair and amber like eyes, spoke to him.

-So, how far are you guys?- she asked. Bucky almost choked on air at that phrase.

-Oh we- - he was about to say, but you arrived at his side and saved the situation. You smiled kindly at the girl and gave a pat on Bucky's arm.

-I'll be exactly of five months in a week, and he's more like the uncle than the father.- she tileted her head towards the brunette. The clerk smirked.

-Is he now?- she said rethorically. Then added, -That would be 277$. You're paying with cash or card?- Bucky gave her the Visa and she thanked him, finishing the payment. Y/n glanced at him with a knowing look and a slight smirk. He rolled his eyes and shook his head a little, she furrowed her brows as if to ask 'Why?' and he just mouthed 'No', so she didn't push. For now.

-Thank you for your purchase, congratulations and we hope to see you soon.- the girl said with courtesy, her gaze lingering a bit on the man, whom didn't return the look. You could see the slight disppointment of the girl.

-Thank you, have a nice day.- you saluted her and then headed out with Bucky. An hour had already passed and you still had in mind to buy a few things, but first you needed a break.

-I desperately want a piece of cake. What do you think?- you elbowed him delicately to catch his attention. He turned his head and nodded, still carrying the two bags. You arrived at the mall's cafe and ordered. He picked an iced coffe and you a slice of cheesecake and some tea, knowing that coffe wasn't that good for pregnancy. You took a seat at one of the tables outside, even tho you were still technically inside the mall.

-So, wanna tell me why you didn't accept the clear as the sun advances that the pretty shop assistant did?- you brought the fork to your mouth. He huffed and shrugged.

-Because I am not interested. I don't think I'm in the right mindspace to date right now.- he responded. You exhaled, tilting your head slightly to the side.

-Buck, I know that it didn't end up that smoothly with Nat, but she's gone.- she realized how that sounded like and quickly corrected herself, -I mean, not gone. But...gone, you know?- you cringed at your own words and he snorted.

-Very smooth y/n.- he joked, earning a glare from you.

-Shut up, I'm trying to help here. What I meant that while I understand that things with Nat didn't end up in the best of ways, she went away to give both of you the space you need to get back on your feet.- you paused, drinking a sip of tea, then offring the last bite of cake to him. He shook his head, giving you a lopsided smile.

-Don't worry, it's all yours.- you pointed your finger at him, while chewing the cheesecake. He chuckled.

-Right answer. Anyways, what I'm trying to say here, Buck, is that you have to allow yourself to try again. Because you deserve it. What do you tell me about that person you said you were interested in? I've never seen you with anyone in the last three months.- he looked to the side for a moment casually.

-They're taken so, yeah.- he simply answered, shrugging while taking a sip of coffe. You got sad all of a sudden. You eyebrows knotted in a sad expression and he noticed, giving you a small smile.

-Hey, don't do that. It's okay. I'm not like heartbroken or shit. I'm happy for her.- he assured you, -She.. well she has a family. She deserves it, so I'm happy for her.- he nodded, smiling softly. You smiled at him too, still with a hint of sadness. He took a nother sip of coffe an then raised an eyebrow, looking at you.

-Why are you crying?- he asked confused. You furruwed your brows in confusion and wiped your fingers under your eyes, realizing that a few tears had escaped. At that point without a reason, you started to feel worse and embarassed and a mess, so you sterted to actually sob a little. Bucky got up and moved his chair next to yours, hugging you.

-Hey what's wrong? I promise I'm alright.- he laughed to try and lighten the situation. You hiccupped into his chest.

-I- I know..it's just.. I don't know, these stupid hormones are making me act hysterical.- you had sittle sobs coming out every now and then. He kissed your head while he stroked your back.

-It's okay, you're not hysterical.- he chuckled softly making you smile. You pulled away from him looking in his eyes.

-I'm a mess aren't I?- Bucky wiped a little smudge of mascara under her eye, and then smiled at her lovingly.

-You look just fine, darling.- she hugged him, whispering a 'thank you, I love you' in his ear.

-I love you too- he answered.

After that, they finished their drink and Y/n told Bucky that she wanted to order a few things for the baby so they did just that. They went in a baby-stuff shop and she choose and placed some orders for a crib, a baby seat for both the car and the kitchen and the changing table. You didn't wanted to buy them right away, so you told the shop to bring them at the tower when they wanted.

When you exited the shop, it was already six thirty pm, so you decided to head back at the tower.

In the car, you told Bucky about your idea to get a midwife to help you during your pregnancy and especially when it'll be time to deliver the baby.

-I don't know y/n... I mean I think that you don't need a midwife or some other stranger to take care of you and the baby. You have Steve. You have me, and Sam, Wanda and the rest of the team. Bruce has basically become a doctor of everything, I'm sure that helping to deliver a child isn't that hard.- he shrugged while keeping his eyes on the road.

-I can't and wouldn't expect you all to babaysit me for another four months, Bucky. You have missions, classes, a you know, your own lives.- he glared at you, probably wanting to intervene and contraddict you, but he remained quiet in the end.

-And, you really can't expect Bruce to handle this. He's a fucking physician for God's sake. He's absolutely amazing, but a delivery? No, that would be too much even for him. And I would be kinda embarassed, for crying out loud.- you added with a high pitched voice. You absentmindely started to cradle your belly. He thought about it for a few seconds.

-I don't know y/n, you know how I am with strangers. But in any case it's your and Steve's decision. Please, talk to him. He's been miserable this week without you. He wouldn't shut up about how he was sorry, and stupid and in love with you and that he misses your smile, your belly and I don't know, I stopped listening after a while.- he said exasperatedly. You suppressed a smile.

-Really? - you asked sheepishly. He turned his head to look at you for a second before smiling knowingly.

-You know it's true. Your fucking married, for God's sake.- he said, tired of you two being idiots. He could just imagine how it'll be when you'll become parents. You will be great at it, but also a mess at the same time.

-Hey, Whiny Soldier, how was shopping? - Sam shouted when he saw the two of you coming in the room with your hands full of bags. You didn't see him, but you just knew that he pursed his lips and shook his head.

You came back at the tower just in time for dinner. Vision and Wanda had aprons tied on their chests, while the others were just chilling in the common room. Steve was there too, beside Bruce.

-Shopping was productive, thank you very much.- you answered pointing for Bucky to put down the bags.

-Let me help you take these to your room.- he offered, but you gave him a look and he understood immediately, putting them down. You smiled and kissed his cheek.

-Thank you for being my human cart today.- his jaw dropped, pretending to be offended.

-Oooh- Sam howled and the others laughed. Steve smiled slightly, still mortified by your little 'cold shoulder week' thing.

-You're lucky I can't tickle you to death right now.- he pointed his finger at you before walking to the fridge to pour himself a glass of water.

-Yeah, yeah, like you say big guy.- you teased him. You paused, shifting your gaze to Steve. He was wearing a blue hoodie and gray sweatpants, his dirty blonde hair were starting to get a bit long at the sides and a few strands fell on his forehead, while his jaw was covered with a slight scruff. His puppy dog eyes met yours and you couln't help but melt a little.

-Steve, are you well enough to help me with these?- you asked and even before you could finish he was on his feet. He almost tripped from how fast he tried to reach you.

-Yes I'm perfectly well I mean I'd love to help you. I mean obv- - you raised an eyebrow and he stopped, looking down. The whole team was watching in silence like it was a damn movie.

-I'm rambling, I'm sorry.- he said lowly. You sighed and places three of the four bags in his hands.

-C'mon. And you all, get a life.- you called them out while you two walked to the elevator. A few minutes later, after the short, silent, trip, you arrived to your room. He placed the bags on the bed and you did the same after closing the door behind you.

-Help me take off the price tags.- you invited him. He grabbed the bag, taking out the first garment. It was a white baby onesie, with Captain America's shield logo on it in white, blue, and red. His breath got caught in his throat and he suddenly let out a sob.

You snapped your head up in confusion, your features softening when you saw him. He sat on the bed, head down, onesie still in his hand. You put down the dress you had in your hands and went to sit next to him, since it would've been really uncomfortable for you to bend on your legs now. You hand went istinctively to rub his back.

-Can we talk?- he asks with broken voice. You tilt your head to the side to look at him with the shadow of a smile on your face.

-Only if you stop crying. Or else none of us will be able to talk at all.- he chuckles slightly making you smile lovingly. He wraps his big arms around you, nuzzling his face in your neck, your collarbones exposed due to the large shirt you were wearing. The wave of relief that washed over you in that moment was hard to describe.

-I missed you so much, baby. I couldn't stand the thought of you being mad at me. I'm sorry for being so impulsive.- he sniffed while he talked. You nodded, cupping his face gently. Steve melted into your touch.

-I know you are. And I'm sorry too. I know that I've been harsh with you these past days, it's just...- he waited patiently, -You're not responsable for only yourself anymore. I understand, please trust me, I understand what you wanted to do and also that you feel like it's your duty to do that. And it kinda is, but my point is- you shook your head realizing that you weren't really explaining yourself.

-What I mean is that you cannot put your life behind other's. Not for me, not even for the team. We're grown ass adults okay? Fow how much you can love us and we can love you, we are our own person. But this- you placed his hand on your belly, -This had been a choice. Your, mine. We both are responsable for this life. The same way I gave up my job, and the lessons. Now, I'm not asking you to stop going on missions, but I'd like you to be with me as much as possible. And that when you go, you'll be careful. Please, Steve.- you say softly, almost in the verge of tears. Again. You've cried more in five months than in your whole life probably.

-You're right. It was pretty hypocritical of me to get mad at you for the same reason in the first place.- he shook his head in disappointment. You rolled your eyes, adding -Work. I think we'll have to rearrange ourselves in this department.- you smiled and he laughed, agreeing.

-So, are we gonna get these off the bed and use the space in a better way or what?- your lips curled in a seductive smirk that quite shocked him. He recovered quickly, jumping on his feet and placing the bags on the ground in a split second. You threw you head back laughing at his eagerness, but you honestly couldn't blame him. Your hormones were a mess and your horniness at level 100, but you often were either sick, tired, hungry or he was. And not to mention the missions that separated you. So let's say that since you got pregnant the sex decreased noticeably, which was something that you wanted to fix. You phisically missed and needed him.

He returned to you and crashed his lips to yours, and soon enough you were a mess of tongues and lip bites and sucks that got interrupeted just briefly to get your clothes off. He didn't have anything under his hoodie, and you happily noticed that he was completely healed and that his weeks in the tower were due to the lack of new missions. You sincerely hoped it would last. After his hoodie, his pants and boxers were next. With you the situation was a bit more complex: first the light material shirt you had on had to be unbuttoned, then your tank top, the jeans' belt and the pants themselves. When you were left in just your underwear, a plain set of cotton white bra and panties, Steve stopped to look at your body.

He was in awe of you. He rose his hand and started a caress that began on your cheek, his thumb on your bottom lip, then descended to your now fuller breasts, to the curve of your waist to to your baby bump. At that point he bent down on his knees and kissed it softly.

-Hey little one, if you want to take a nap, now it would be a good time.- he whispered directly to the stretched skin. You let out a sound that was halfway between of a whine and a laugh.

-Steve, Jesus Christ.- you covered your face with your hands. You heard him laugh and stand on his feet again. He removed your hands gently, kissing you again with slow, agonizing passion that even let escape a ridiculous whine from your lips at the loss.

-Where were we?- he reached behind your back and unclasped the bra, sliding it off your shoulders and freeing your breasts.

-Mrs and Mr. Rogers I'm sorry to disturb, miss Maximoff would like me to inform you that dinner's ready.- you stopped hearing F.R.I.D.A.Y.'s voice. You groaned, annoyed at the interruption, but Steve suddenly started to push you on the bed and to lick and suck your boobs.

-Tell miss Maximoff that we have dinner here.- he responded biting softly your nipple, making you whimper.

-It will be done, mr Rogers.-

-Geez Steve, couldn't you be more specific?- you sassed with a deep breath, distracted by your husband's mouth. He snorted moving further down to remove your panties.

-You're already pregnant, couldn't be more obvious than that.- you started to laugh, but it soon became a loud moan when you felt his tongue licking a long stripe on your pussy. You closed your eyes and istinctively wanted to bring your hand in his hair, but you found an obstacle. A medium big, round and naked obstacle. You huffed and Steve stopped, tilting his head to the side, since now you couldn't even see him from between your legs.

-Are you okay?- he asked, worry in his voice. You sat on the bed, helping yourself with your hands. He returned beside you, waiting.

-It's just..ugh I'm so awkward and big and not confident if I have to be honest.- you say for the first time out loud. You wanted to cover yourself by curling your knees to you chest, but again, you swollen stomach didn't allow it. At that point you got even more frustrated.

-Damn it.- Steve places his fingers under your chin and made you look at him. His eyes were serious but not mad.

-Hey, none of that. Do you even realize the miracle your beautiful body is doing? You're creating a whole life in there, baby.- he smiled brightly looking in your eyes, -And by the way, you're still hot as fuck.- that made you laugh. He kept smiling while he made you lay down again on the sheets.

-This beautiful face..these cheeks are even sweeter now.- he peppered them with kisses making you giggle uncontrollably.

-Don't get me started on these ones...- his hands cupped your breasts while his mouth attacked your nipples and the soft skin. You moaned softly, your hand immediately in his short hair, your nails delicately scratching his scalp.

-But you know my most favorite thing?- he kept going, -This.- he was now between your legs, kneeled in front of your stomach. He caressed it and kissed it a few times. Then his gaze locked in yours again. You almost felt hypnotized, both by his velvety voice and his touch.

-I love it because it's round and soft and most importantly because it's giving me a family. A baby. And you know who's giving me all of this? You are. So don't ever be insecure about this wonderful body, please.- you smiled at him softly. Soon enough the mood changed again when he spoke his next words.

-Now, are you gonna let me thank this stunning body like it deserves or not?- you felt the smirk in his voice, his blue eyes hungry. You mirrored his expression propping yourself up on your elbows.

-Would like to see it.- you answer. He huffs out a laugh and reprises what he started doing a few minutes prior. He took good care of you until you came on his tongue, and at that point you grabbed him to crash your lips together. You kept moving and bringing him with you, until he found himself laying down on his back and you straddling his hips. Steve's hands immediately went to your sides, trying to not move and let you do the work, even though all he wanted was to fuck you until you both could't anymore.

You kept you eyes on his while you stroked him a few times before slowly sinking on him. He squeezed both his eyes shut and your hips, huffing a long breath. That could've almost made you laugh if you weren't just as wrecked. Your hips started moving, back and forth, to the sides in painfully slow circular motions. At one point he grabbed your ass, sitting up and making you gasp.

-Doll I'm kinda struggling here- he breathed out kissing your neck while you kept moving. -I want to be delicate but damn.- he nipped at your sweet spot between your neck and shoulder. Your hips started going faster with the help of his hands guiding you and soon enough you were panting and kissing each other passionately and messily.

-Oh, Steve I'm almost there- you moan hugging his head to your chest. He moaned too, reaching in front of you with his hand to circle your clit.

-I'm right behind you baby.- he reassured you while in reality he was trying hard not to come in that exact moment. He craved you more than usual, not only beacause your body was actually so fucking hot to him but also because he hasn't touched you for almost two whole weeks.

Just a few seconds later you gripped his shoulders, hiding your face in his neck. His breath got caught in his troath at the way you clenched around him when you came. And as a cue, he followed you short after, coming inside you. You stayed like that, hugging and cuddling for some minutes, then he kissed you and moved you gently on his side, hissing slightly when you lost contact.

-Be right back.- he said going to the bathroom and returning with a wet wash cloth. He cleaned you up from both of your releases and then went back to throw the dirty fabric in the laundry basket. You looked at him with a lopsided smile, still hazy and quite tired from the recent activity. He mirrored your expression with messy hair, crawling in the bed to you and pulling you on his side after.

-I needed that.- you say. He sighed, -I definetly did too. How come we always end up having sex after we argue or talk?- he asked casually. You shrugged.

-I don't know, the important thing is that the talk comes first and then, the sex.- he agreed with a nod. You chewed on you lip a bit before speaking again.

-Honey- you called, he hummed.

-While you were away last week I started to think about how I will probably need more help in the future, you know. And the fact that you and the others are often away on missions. And I mean it's totally alright, that's work but... I felt so bad when Sam and Wanda were left behind last time. And just to 'babysit' me.- he looked down at you with a frown.

-They offered to stay behind because they wanted to. We're taking turns on missions all the time.- he responded. You barely noticed that he had started to caress your belly.

-That's not the point, you know it. The last mission was quite big. I know my work well enough to know that Fury would've sent all the team, if I weren't left behind. Also by now we both understood that this baby isn't a normal baby and that is why I'm so sick so often. Bruce can't be here all the time, and for how good and skilled he his, he's not an expert in the baby field.- he was listening to you intently, but he wasn't quite sure with where you wanted to go with this.

-What's the point?- he asked, moving a strand of your hair from your face with his fingers.

-The point is, that I've read a lot in these months, and I think that we should hire a midwife. It would be someone that stays with me most of the day and helps me. An actual expert.-

-And how would you explain that our child has the blood of two super soldiers?- his hand motioned himself and you. You got up, towards the bathroom.

-Steve, we share the house with a god, a giant green monster, enhanced people, a witch, a kid that has the powers of a spider and an intelligent robot. I think it wouldn't be a great surprise.- you closed the door, peed and then refreshed yourself before going back to take some clean clothes. You saw that he was waiting for you to get out, probably wanting to shower.

-Okay then, I guess we can arrange that, if that will make you feel better.- he finally spoke. You kissed his cheek, already in your underwear.

-Thank you. You're showering?- he nods, the raises an eyebrow.

-Wanna join?- you laugh and shake your head.

-No, baby not now. I get tired quite easily and if the bed's already a bit difficult to work with, the shower must be a nightmare.- he pouted.

-You're right.-

-But- he stops the door before it closes, waiting for you to continue. -I want to fix your hair and your beard if you let me.- a lopsided smile opens on his face.

-Be my guest.-

After you sat him down on the edge of the bathtub, you shortened the longer strands on top with tiny scissors. After that you picked up the electric razor and groomed the sides, shortneing them but not removing them completely. You did the same with the beard, leaving a short, barely visible scruff. About twenty minutes later you were done. You put down the razor and took a step back to look at your work.

-Perfect.- you commented, brushing the hair that fell on his chest and shoulders. He stood up and looked at himself in the mirror, smiling.

-Is there anything you can't do?- he asked. You smirked, kissing him before starting to clean up.

-No, I'm a woman.-

*************

Tag list: @polarcrystall @a--1--1--3 @silver-winter-wolf @jessyballet

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radiorenjun · 4 years

Text

Hug. iv

Pairing: Liu Yangyang x Reader

Genre: Angst, Comedy, Fluff

Warnings: Swearing, Bullying, Attempt Suicide and mentions of self degrading, insecurities, anxiety, negative thoughts, physical injuries.

Looking from the perspective of Liu Yangyang, the boy who bullied a girl to the point she had a scar to burden both of their lives. He lived on with a heavy heart until he finally enters college and bumps into a girl with a familiar scar and the same tattoo on her wrist as his.

Chapters: iii, iv, v

Tags: @wonho-ssi @chuu4you @fullsun-haechanie @you-cant-spell-slay-without-lay @carefreebubble @uglyratlmao @harleyblaze

Yangyang walked down the halls of his school after he was finally dismissed from his class of the day. It had been a while since he came across his supposed soulmate, even then, his life didn't change much. The college life everyone was looking forward to didn't seem as interesting as Yangyang thought.

It was just like his life in high school. He saw a few of his old classmates around the halls and majoring in music didn't seem so exciting than his brother made it out to be. Speaking of his brother , he and Ten agreed that they both should start opening up more to each other just to spend more quality time.

"What?!" Ten exclaimed in the loudest voice possible. Yangyang flinched at the loud tone after confessing what's been on his mind lately. "You got into contact with Y/N L/N again?! That's great! What happened?! Did you two made up?" Ten slammed his palms on the table in excitement.

The bright smile stretched across his brothers face made the memory of his sad smile with bruised lip from back when he was still young flashed his mind. Yangyang winced at the memory before avoiding his brother's eyes.

Yangyang gulped down a chunk of egg yolk before continuing his story. "Nothing much happened, we just came across each other in the same building. And well..." Yangyang paused briefly, biting his lip anxiously as he tried not to eye the mark on his wrist.

"Well?" Ten waited for Yangyang to continue. Yangyang silently tugged on the sleeves of his baggy black hoodie down to reveal his soulmate tattoo, laying his wrist in the table. Ten's eyes darted from Yangyang's to his wrist in confusion before it all clicked.

"Holy. Fuck." Ten gasped, realizing what it meant. Yangyang shushed his brother loudly, putting a finger to his lips, making the sleeves of his hoodie fall down to hide the mark once again. "Ten, you idiot! Chenle's right down the hall!" Yangyang scolded.

"You two are soulmates?!" Ten squealed. Yangyang put his head in his palms in embarrassment, "dont remind me." he mumbled. "Thats-wow. I literally have no words, right now. So what was her reaction?" Ten asked eagerly.

"Well I- I didn't exactly tell her that. I don't think she knows. I don't want her to." Yangyang shook his head profusely, putting his hands in his hoodie pockets to clench his fists. "What? Why?" Ten whined. "Why? Why?! Oh I don't know, Ten, how would you feel if your soulmate is suddenly the kid who bullied you mercilessly back when you were 12?!" Yangyang snapped.

"Okay I get that part but this is your soulmate we're talking bout. They're supposed to love you no matter what!" Ten reasoned. "You dont understand!" Yangyang barked. "She's better off having no soulmate than having her old bully as a soulmate." Yangyang calmed down slightly.

"You don't understand, Ten. This isnt like your relationship with your soulmate. You didn't bully her when you were kids." Yangyang hissed harshly. Ten winced at the mention of his soulmate who had previously passed away.

"Dont bring her into this, Liu Yangyang." Ten snapped, glaring daggers into Yangyangs eyes. "She's your soulmate whether you both want it or not. Your her soulmate whether you feel guilty or not. When the time comes you two will eventually be together, that's how the world works. Okay, kid?" he lectured.

Yangyang felt the pain in his chest tighten. Sighing in defeat, he knew he couldn't battle with fate itself so he did nothing but nodded. "Okay." Yangyang sighed, unclenching his fists. Ten huffed grabbing his plate and walking towards the sink.

"Im sorry for bringing her into this." Yangyang muttered, he hated the thought of his family getting hurt.

"I was just-"

"It's fine. Just promise me you'll talk when something's bothering you." Ten said without giving his brother a single glance. "Okay, baby Yangyang?" Ten grinned, turning his head to his brother who gave him a frown. "Baby- Im not your baby. I'm going to college next month." Yangyang deadpanned.

"Still."

Yangyang walked passed the crowded halls filled with students. His eyes focused on the ground to avoid eye contact, it seemed as if his ears had blurred out all the sounds around him. He felt numb. Yangyang decided that he would walk by the park to get some fresh air before picking up Chenle from his tuitions.

Yangyang walked down the park to see the oh-so-familiar siamese cat that he and Ten rescued months ago, which ran away the moment it saw that Ten was carrying a bucket full of water to bathe the dirty thing despite Yangyang's protests.

"Hey, I remember you." Yangyang spoke softly, kneeling down to brush his fingers against the cat's thin yet fluffy fur. The small creature purred in response as Yangyang gently caressed it's head with his thumb, scratching the underside of its chin.

"How are you, buddy?" Yangyang smiled as the cat stared up at him. "What are you doing here you little rascal?" he giggled to himself. He was too indulged in the cat's hypnotising blue eyes to realise that someone had been coming towards him.

The person kneeled down infront of him, the moment their eyes met with Yangyang. The boy jumped back in surprise, "oh, Y/n!" his body tense at the sight of the girl carrying a small package of cat food. Y/n blushed at the sight of Yangyang, waving shyly before kneeling down to squeeze out some food infront of the cat.

Yangyang avoided her gaze when she patted the small cat's head before pulling out a notebook from her saddlebag, quickly writing down on it before showing it to Yangyang. His eyes widened slightly at the gesture, slowly taking the book in his hands to read what's written.

'Is Yumyum yours?' it read.

"Yumyum?" Yangyang asked, furrowing his brows before looking at the cat, not noticing the flushed look that spread all over the girl's face. "Is that what you name him?" he chuckled, caressing his fingers over the small creature's messy fur as he handed over the girl's notebook back to her.

"No, he's not." he replied, a small smile stretching across his face. "My brother and I found him a couple months ago all wounded. When he got better, he just ran away before we could give him a proper bath." Yangyang chuckled at the memory.

Y/n started writing down quickly on her notebook, the sound of lead scratching on the surface of paper filling their ears as they ignored the people around them. Yangyang looked up, getting a moment to look at his soulmate's appearance as she writes.

The sunlight reflecting on her eyes made it seem as if he was seeing stars in the night sky. Her lips formed into a small pout as she wrote, her eyebrows furrowed in concentration. Her hair framing her face, exposing her features.

He was brought back to his senses when he realised that y/n was staring back at him in concern, her fingers snapping infront of his face. "Sorry, I was daydreaming." he mumbled, attempting to avoid her gaze by looking down at the cat which was finishing it's meal. He could feel heat taking over his face as Y/n brought her notebook to his line of vision, gesturing for him to read it.

'Not to be rude but, what are you doing here?'

Yangyang let out a soft sigh, sitting down on the concrete with his legs crossed after he put down his violin case carefully on the floor along with his bag. "I just wanted to take a walk before I pick up my cousin from school, then this little guy caught my eye" he replied with a smile. Y/n nodded slowly, her mouth forming a silent 'oh'.

"What are you doing here?" Yangyang asked after a pregnant pause, intertwining his fingers together and laying them on his lap as he stared up at her curiously. Y/n bit her lip before writing down in her notebook once again.

'I started coming here every Friday to feed Yumyum. I like to have sometime after a long week of school.'

"Is being an art major that hard?" he asked, feeling his body relax as he continued to have a conversation with her. Everything felt as if it was meant to be. Y/n was surprisingly nice to talk to, even though she was slightly shy to talk to the person she hasn't seen in years.

Yangyang forgot all bout the tension between them. Her hand pushing against his shoulder when he let out a corny joke, his smile widens as she let's out a silent giggle against her palm. It felt so natural talking to her. As if they had been good friends their whole lives. As if he had never hurted her. As if it didn't feel like a punishment nor a curse to be bounded together by a mark.

Yangyang's eyes widened at the thought, his body tensed up immediately. "I-uh" he stuttered, grabbing his violin case and his bag, slinging it over his shoulder. His hand going over to his left sleeve, tugging it over his fingers behind his back as he stood up abruptly.

"I j-just remembered I gotta pick up my cousin." Yangyang stammered nervously, his heart felt heavy again as he avoided y/n's eyes laced with concern. "I-Im sorry. I h-have to go. I-I'll see you around c-campus," he bit his lip, avoiding her gaze before walking away as fast as he could.

He felt his heart ache as memories flooded his head. 'Shit,' he thought. Flashbacks of him pushing and kicking the young girl, his brother's bruised lip and the bullying he endured fluttered through his mind. He grabbed the waterbottle from his backpack, chugging down some water to calm down.

Yangyang sat alone at the table of the cafeteria like always, mindlessly eating his food. His eyes wandered around the room, gaze falling at the innocent girl with the scar on her lips smiling happily in a table surrounded by her friends.

He sighed at the sight of her, leaning his face against his palm. The sunlight shining on her form making her aura brighter as she let out silent laughs and scribble quickly on her notebook. It felt nice to see the young girl get along with so many people.

Yangyang looked down at his food, playing with food once again. He pondered if this is what life would've been for y/n if he hadn't come into the picture. He wondered if he would be sitting in the same table as her if he hadn't kicked that ball towards her.

Yangyang's thoughts were interrupted when he heard someone pull the two chairs infront of him, two boys filling in the empty spaces. "Liu Yangyang right? The German violin kid who's also in Professor Zhou's class?" the boy who looks as if he came from the sports department.

Yangyang raised his brow, nodding hesitantly. "Great, I'm Guanheng. You can call me Hendery, if you like. This is Xuxi." the other boy introduced, his forearm laying on the table as his other hand pointed towards his friend who waved with a toothy smile in response.

"In case you didn't know. We, too, are also in the same class as you." Hendery smiled. Yangyang nodded in confusion, not seeing why they're sitting infront of him, eyes wandering from theirs to his soulmate's form. "Look, we know that the music project could be done solo and all. But-"

"We need your help!" Xuxi slammed his hands on the table, making Yangyang flinch in shock. Yangyang's eyes widened in surprise before sparing a glance at y/n who was still calmly communicating with her friends.

"What do you need my help for?" Yangyang spoke, raising his brow as he meet their nervous eyes and awkward smiles. "We wanted to do a duet for the project. Then our dumb asses realised we can't play instruments for shit." Xuxi explained.

"So you need my help to be your instrumentals?" Yangyang questioned, raising his brow. "Yes," the two boys said in unison, letting out similar cheeky grins. "Why should I help you guys exactly? I don't even know you guys that well." Yangyang went on.

"He's got a point." Xuxi mumbled to Hendery, only to get shoved by the shoulder. "Come on, we could be your friends! No offense, the table seems empty." Hendery smiled innocently. "I'm good," Yangyang mumbled, going back to his food with his eyes occasionally glancing back at the girl a couple tables away from them.

"Come on, we'll do anything!" Lucas nagged. "Yeah, what you want, Liu? Money? Cheat answers to the exams?" Hendery went on. Yangyang couldn't be bothered to even consider a word they were offering, for he was too busy gazing into the radiant beauty that is his soulmate.

"Yangyang? You listening?" Hendery asked once he realised Yangyang wasn't listening to a word he said. Both boys turned their backs, following Yangyang's eyes to the girl in sight. "Ooh," Xuxi grinned, giving Hendery a knowing smirk.

"Wow man. Didn't know you'd be the type to like someone other than your soulmate but I'll do the job for you-" Xuxi stood up from his chair, causing Yangyang's eyes to widen in panic. He stood up abruptly and reached out to grip his shoulder to stop Xuxi from taking a step further.

He watched as the girls began to stand up and leave the cafeteria. Yangyang let out a sigh of relief before glaring at the two boys, "dont you dare talk to her. I'll join your group, just-" he paused with a click of his tongue. "Just don't talk to her." Yangyang growled, pushing Xuxi's shoulder away before picking up his bag and gripped the case of his violin, leaving without another word.

He jogged out of the cafeteria, ignoring the two boy's loud voices of questioning when to meet up to practice for the project. Yangyang slowed down once he felt like he had gone far enough from the cafeteria, taking small breaths as he walked down the hall.

He stopped when he saw a familiar girl sitting all alone in a table with a pencil hanging on the top of her ears, a ruler in her hand and a piece of paper in their other. Brows furrowed in concentration, tongue slightly stuck out.

Yangyang smiled to himself at the sight of how cute she looked, leaning to get a better look of her expression. But he was soon interuppted by a male stepping into his line of vision, he looked around his age. "Who are you?" the male spoke in a rude tone.

Yangyang took a step back in surprise before stuttering out, "I-I just came here t-to talk to y/n." The male raised a brow in suspicion, frowning as he crossed his arms. "What? Are you like, her friend or something?" he asked.

Yangyang didn't know how to respond. Was he her friend? Or was he still that same bully in her eyes? "I-" he was cut off with a click of the male's tongue. "Thought so," the male then rudely shut the door to his face, leaving a baffled and flustered Yangyang standing in the hallway in confusion.

Yangyang ran a hand through his hair in frustration. He couldn't get this note right for tomorrow's solo presentation, he took a long sip of his Americano, clearing his throat before starting to play once again.

The sound of his violin echoing through the small room, once again. Yangyang's tired eyes never wandering away from the music sheet displayed before him. His mind concentrated on the notes to realise that a girl had walked into the music room.

The sound of a chair grinding against the tile caused Yangyang to jump back in shock, looking back in relief to see y/n placing the chair back to its original place. "Y/n?" Yangyang raised his brow in confusion. "What are you doing here? Curfew's in half an hour." Yangyang asked.

The girl smiled, quickly writing in her notebook and shoving it to the distressed boy's face.

'I was done with my assignment for today, I was heading back to the dorms to hear the beautiful melody of a violin. What are you still doing here?'

Yangyang bit his lip slightly, smiling up at her shyly. "Same here, I just kept getting these notes wrong. I need to get them done before tomorrow," Yangyang explained, scratching the back of his neck with one hand and pointing at the music sheet displayed with his bow in the other.

Y/n nodded, looking around the music room to observe the instruments around them. Yangyang put his violin back in its case, trying to ease his heart rate as he felt his heartstrings being tugged with every movement the girl made.

His left wrist ached to touch hers, but occupied it with tidying up his things and putting them into his case and bag. "Um, I'm closing up soon. You wanna walk back to the dorms together?" Yangyang asked hesitantly, swinging his bag over his shoulder as his eyes wandered to his feet to avoid eye contact.

Y/n nodded, walking out of the room, clutching her notebook in her hands as she waited for Yangyang to lock up the room and walk down the halls together. There was an awkward tension in the atmosphere around them as they didn't know what to talk bout.

Yangyang gulped internally, putting down his violin case as he closed the door, turning the key twice and ensuring the door is locked. Yangyang didn't notice y/n's eyes wandering curiously down his tall form, how his hair was tussled and messy from his fingers running through it I'm frustration.

How his lips were plump and sucked in between his teeth nervously. His freshly dyed brown hair. The baggy sweater making him look casually aesthetic. Y/n knew it's wrong to be looking at her friend like this, especially if Yangyang had a soulmate.

Speaking of soul mates, y/n's eyes wandered down to Yangyang's wrist. The long sleeves of his sweater barely covering the black ink mark staining the skin of his left wrist. Her eyes widened as she spotted two balloons, similar to the ones on hers.

When Yangyang moved away, y/n look up at his eyes which were filled with nervousness. He coughed lightly to release the awkward tension, "let's go." he mumbled shyly, turning to walk to the direction of the dorms before he was held back by a small hand wrapped around his forearm.

Yangyang's eyes widened as he looked back, looking down at the fingers gripping his white sweater tightly as to not make him leave. His eyes hesitantly looked at her own. Yangyang felt like he was going to melt at the sight of her eyebrows furrowed cutely. "Y/n?"

The hand that was on his forearm went down the his wrist, right below his tattoo. She lifted it up, tugging down the sleeves which made Yangyang's eyes widen. "Wait, no-" he stuttered out, trying to tug his wrist out of her grip before she could see the mark.

Unfortunately, he didn't realise how hard he was pulling. With the sheer amount of force he applied to pulling back his wrist, he made the girl fall forwards to the floor, eliciting a small broken hoarse squeak from the girl. "Oh my God, Y/n," Yangyang gasped out, realising his mistake.

His heart clenched. Once again,that excruciating feeling in his chest appeared. He couldn't make himself move to help you get up and once you do, you were looking at him with such concerned eyes, his guilt increased tenfold.

"I-Im sorry, I have to go" were the last words Yangyang stuttered out before sprinting out of there. Trying to go somewhere to clear his clouded mind, leaving his soulmate standing there in confusion. Yangyang took a deep breath as he barged into his dorm room, not caring the questions his roommates bombarded him as he quickly went to his room.

'Life couldn't get any shittier'

A/n: hey! This took me so long forgive me for the delay. I'll probably release the next chapter sooner than later so keep an eye out for that. Sorry for those who waited for so long for this lol. I realised its 12:40 AM and I'm on 10% and there's a chance that I have a quiz tomorrow that I have not studied for. Wml

Btw

#hug.#yangyang angst #wayv yangyang #nct yangyang #yangyang x reader #yangyang #nct angst #nct wayv #nct x reader #nctzen #wayv angst #wayv #wayv x reader #wayv scenarios #wayv au

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