#i love graduation more and more every episode
Text
THE MOMENT
izuku x fem!reader
synopsis: izuku is asked the exact moment that he fell in love with his wife, and he knows exactly when
authors note: why do i keep writing about podcasts all of a sudden lmaoooo 😭 also i proofread this when i was tired asf so if it’s bad sorryyyy
“it’s really nice to have you here mr. midoryia! thank you for agreeing to join us on our podcast. we know how busy you are saving the country, so it’s nice to see you in a different light” the man flashed him a smile, which izuku was happy to return.
“yeah of course! i figured i should see why everyone is telling me that this podcast is so great” izuku crossed one of his legs over the other. his pr team thought it’d be a good idea to branch out from the regular news interviews and talk shows, so they had scheduled him a podcast episode on the number one podcast in japan.
“so having the number one hero with us is of course a prime opportunity to pick your brain. all about your hero work, who your role models were throughout the years, and maybe let us look behind the big deku label and just let us get to know midoryia izuku if you allow”
izuku nodded with his picture perfect smile “i’d like that. most people don’t respect that i’m an actual person and not just some figure with no feelings, so i really appreciate that”
the host nodded looking down at his phone “so first we wanted to give you a big congratulations! you are your wife are celebrating your second year of marriage. that must be nice”
“yes we did! thank you from both of us really. i took some time off and we had a really, really nice vacation together. it was nice to be away from all the eyes for a while”
“of course! i know it can probably get hard with all the fans that you have. everybody wanting an autograph, kids lining up to meet you, both women and men alike wanting a chance with you even though you’re clearly married. how do you deal with that in your relationship?”
“a lot of communication, like, a lot” izuku nodded his head slowly just to make his point “we set boundaries to make sure we’re comfortable with everything that happens. like one thing she’s not very comfortable with is fans kissing me on the cheek, and i totally respect that! the first time it happened we did have a bit of falling out but we communicated and got through it”
the host nodded his head listening along “he’s not just good at saving the world folks! he’s also a relationship pro”
this made both of them laugh easing away any underlying tensions that were there before.
“staying on the topic of your relationship we have a question. every week we ask people what questions to ask to our guests when they come onto the show, and the most asked question was this. what was the exact moment that you fell in love with your wife? i mean she must’ve done something to make you look at her the way you do”
“hearty question,” he joked rubbing his hand against his chin “but i’m pretty sure i know when. it was back in UA, third year. it was our last big event before we graduated and i was struggling to get ready”
he could imagine it like it happened yesterday. third year izuku midoryia stood looking at himself in the mirror with an annoyed look on his face. it had been three years and he still hadn’t learned how to tie his damned tie. the lump of a tie sat dead center on his chest staring right back at him, taunting him.
it’s not like he didn’t try to learn. he had kacchan try to teach him. that didn’t end well. he had his mom try too, and he ended up getting his hands tangled. and youtube? forget it.
he silently cursed to himself taking off the tie once more. there were three soft knocked at his door, which at this point, annoyed him further.
“kacchan i said i’d be right out! could you at least wait five minutes before coming back?”
“izuku? it’s me” your voice alone made his shoulders ease. he came over to the door shaking his head.
“i’m sorry y/n. i thought you were kacchan-“ when he finally got a good look at you all of his words caught in his throat. you were wearing a sage green dress that went down to your ankles. he wasn’t complaining though because on the left there was a slit where he got a good view of your legs “but you are definitely not him”
you walked past izuku white heels clicking against the floor “i sure hope not. i don’t think he can pull of this dress like i can” izuku shut the door softly then made a beeline over to you. as soon as you turned around you noticed he was leaning down to kiss you “woah there pretty boy,” you held up a single finger blocking his lips “attitude check first, kisses later. what’s the matter?”
he sighed when you rejected his advances “i don’t have an attitude-“
he stopped when you made your ‘don’t lie to me face’
“fine,” he stood in the mirror and watched as you stood next to him. you looked stunning. the way you wore the dress like it was perfectly crafted for you had him staring long and hard. it made him feel like a doofus beside you with his slightly messy hair and chunky tie.
“i can’t get my tie right”
you snorted turning him towards you “you’re acting like that’s new news” he rolled his eyes at your comment pulling away from your hands “no! baby i’m sorry i didn’t mean it” your hands gently grabbed his wrists pulling him back “i’ll do it for you”
his eyebrows scrunched together as you started slipping off his tie “you know how to tie ties? how? why? when?”
you couldn’t help but laugh at his confused state going to wrap the tie around his neck again straightening it out “my grandma taught me. she said that i need to learn if it i ever find that special man in my life. i didn’t really believe her because who the hell would i be tying a tie for?”
he watched carefully as you flipped the tie around with ease. folding it this way, then slipping it through one of the openings. he also watched your face. concentrated on the task at hand. his heart was racing by the time you slide the perfect knot up to his neck. tilting your head you nodded.
“but i’m glad she did y’know,” you grabbed the middle of his tie pulling him in for a kiss. he wrapped one of his arms around your waist and the other hand went securely on your back. when you pulled away there was a stupid grin on your face “cause there’s no one else i would want to do this for”
it was like he was getting hit by a truck of nostalgia. all the feelings he felt in that moment came rushing back to him. the swoop of his stomach when you pulled him into the kiss. the alarms blaring in his head from the new sensation.
he. was. in. love.
the kind of love people look for in movies, books, shows. he found that in you.
he sighed into the kiss going to move you against the wall. you had your hands on his waist trying to steady yourself. when he pulled away your face was flushed from his sudden actions. which he made sure not to mention in the podcast.
“well maybe i should do your ties more often”
“yeah.. you should”
izuku snapped out of the memory finally placing himself back into reality “that’s how i remember it. i don’t know if my wife remembers differently” he shrugged with a smile on his face.
“wow, that is straight out of a romance book. so does she still tie your ties today?”
izuku nodded “oh yeah, i don’t trust anyone else to do it. even on our wedding day i forced her to tie it. she was all worried about me seeing her before the wedding so i covered my eyes”
you stood there in your white dress trying not to laugh at your 6 foot husband covering his face like a child playing hide and seek “you really want me to do this?”
“please honey”
“only since you asked so nicely, but no peeking!” walking over you went to put his tie on like you did every other time. when you finished you gave his chest a pat “there you go champ”
“y/n.. you didn’t give me a kiss”
“what?”
he let out a childlike sigh “every time you do my tie you pull me in for a kiss. that’s how this works”
now you laughed.
“izu we can’t kiss before we have the wedding. it’s not the way it goes”
“i won’t tell anyone!”
after a couple moments of silence he could feel a tug on his tie as you drew him close. it was a quick kiss, but just enough to get him through.
the host nodded along a bit jealous that his love life wasn't as magical.
"if only we could all be like you and your wife deku”
“i get that a lot. my wife’s pretty great”
taglist! @sagejin 🫶🏾
comment if you’d like to be added
#honeipie#anime#bnha x reader#mha#writing#x reader#izuku x reader#izuku midoriya#mha midoriya#bnha midoriya#drabble#bnha deku#deku x y/n#mha x reader#deku x reader
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HEARTBREAK SYNDROME.
episode eleven :: “REDBULL FANS”
꒰꒰◌‧₊ ⬪˙⋆ pairing ︴various drivers x y/n
꒰꒰◌‧₊ ⬪˙⋆ genre ︴social media au / irl snippets
꒰꒰◌‧₊ ⬪˙⋆ summary ﹔musical releases resume and so does the drama.
꒰꒰◌‧₊ ⬪˙⋆ face claim ﹔ wonyoung jang (28)
꒰꒰◌‧₊ ⬪˙⋆ warnings ﹕ excessive cussing, none.
ylnestate
♡ liked by lewishamilton, carlossainz55 and 18,450,948 more.
ylnestate U&U no. 44 will be released tonight at midnight. ‘Grandstand Girl’ is the 44th mini album by ﹫y/n and features artists like ﹫theweeknd, ﹫justinbieber, and ﹫champagnepapi. All songs (apart from Trust Issues) were produced and written by Y/n in the past couple months as she’s currently working on her biggest record yet, so stay tuned for that 😉⭐️!
tagged: theweeknd, champagnepapi, justinbieber.
1,492,592 comments.
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username U&U MEANS FULL ALBUM ON THE WAYYYYYY THANK YOU MOTHER 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽
justinbieber thank you for having me ❤️ love you
username CLAIMING I DONT DO DRUGS
username i’m new here!!! what’s does U&U mean?
→ username u&u stands for undecided and unreleased, y/n usually drops u&u eps right before an album when she has songs that don’t fit the genre/make sense with the rest of the album. they usually consist of 2-6 songs and this one is ep number 44! hope this helped 💗
→ username totally did!!!! thank u bae
username NEW ALBUM ON THE WAY?????????
[liked by y/n]
username oh my god I CAN NOT RIGHT NOW. LOOORD.
theweeknd 💙💜
username drake finally got that feature 🤣
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username let me be delulu for a sec. what are the odds that u&u no. 44 is called ‘GRANDSTAND girl’ 🤨 looking at you lewis
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jensonbutton i already knew abt this yet i’m still surprised
→ y/n u should be used to my bullshit by now 🤨
→ sebastianvettel i know i am lol
→ username “slay” “abt” “lol” who are you folks anymore
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→ aussiegrit it’s the y/n effect
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lilymhe how dare you
→ lilymhe do it again 🤭
landonorris NEEDED A FIX OF YOU 🗣
→ charles_leclerc NOT JUST A KISS FROM YOU 🗣
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→ username SPOILERS?????
→ landonorris yes.
username YES?????
y/n
♡ liked by lewishamilton, oscarpiastri and 11,393,159 more.
y/n SEBASTIAN VETTEL PLEASE COME BACK 💔 adopted another papaya fucker and a williams kid ft. fernando rizzlonso and sir lew 🩷
993,593 comments.
y/l/nestate more kids?
username LEWIS 👊🏽 IS SO 👊🏽 HANDSOME 🗣
→ mercedesamgf1 real
username all this content today i feel like a ten year old at a sephora 😍😍😍
username THE ROSCOE STICKER.
→ mercedesamgf1 so cute isn’t he 😍
→ username ADMIND KAKFJSKSK
username lewis graduated from a bank cause that face card can’t decline.
username how does he *just* look like that ????!,!,’ 😭
username FERNANDO RIZZLONSO.
fernandoalo_oficial in slayzuka
→ username IN WHERE????
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username aRE WE GONNA IGNORE HE COVERING MAX’S FACE WITH A ROSCOE STICKER???
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landonorris new brothers unlocked
→ logansargeant hello brother
→ landonorris hello, i hope you know you’re my step brother bc i don’t share y/n 🙏🏼
→ oscarpiastri what about me?
→ landonorris read the terms and conditions, same rules apply to every adopted kid AFTER lando norris 🫶🏻
→ logansargeant ok
→ username PLS
→ username TERMS AND CONDITIONS 😭😭😭
yukitsunoda0511 why does lewis get the good photos
→ y/n he was literally just standing there and he looked good
→ georgerussell63 not fair u always catch the rest of us off guard
→ y/n i caught him off guard too, maybe he’s not the problem 🤭
→ charles_leclerc I’m-
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username casually posts after ep announcement, no one like you, y/n y/l/n.
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→ y/n on our way rn 🏃♀️
carlossainz55 you adopted oscar???
→ y/n yeah.
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→ y/n if u have a problem with my son u talk to me 🤨
→ oscarpiastri thanks mum
→ username … is the beef squashed now??
→ username i mean.. i hope
#☆ — ¡h4m1lt0ns!˚⁎⁺˳ .#f1 x y/n#f1 fanfiction#f1 smau#f1 x reader#f1 x you#lewis hamilton x reader#carlos sainz x reader#charles leclerc x reader#lando norris x reader#daniel ricciardo x reader#yuki tsunoda x reader#pierre gasly x trader#george russell x reader#fernando alonso x reader#mark webber x reader#oscar piastre x reader
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—NEON GUTS
I got them bad grades I was in love with my tutor <3
Summary; Scaramouche is “forced” to tutor you the “dumbass” in the class
A/n; hi this my first story and I just came from wattpad please give me some tips <33
Warnings; Fem!reader (Sorry </3), an oc will be used for your group, Highschool au, timestamps don’t matter unless said otherwise
Genre; smau, fluff, & a little angst
Status; hiatus
Updates; Every two days
Playlist
EPISODES & MORE!!
CREDITS!!
[Name]’s dumbasses | Scaramouche’s group(?)
SEASON 1!!
Episode 1 - Your handwriting pisses me off
Episode 2 - I almost got sent to the hospital
Episode 3 - Tutor Session yay… I’m gonna cry (wc)
Episode 4 - A COMMUNITY PROJECT!?
Episode 5 - Anime binging
Episode 6 - Boba bomb!
Episode 7 - First Customer!!
Episode 8 - HE FOUND OUT?! GASP (wc)
Episode 9 - FALSE NEWS </3
Episode 10 - HAPPY HALLOWEEN
Episode 11 - HALLOWEEN PARTY
SEASON 2!!
Episode 1 - FALSE NEWS </3 Pt.2 (wc)
Episode 2 - Jealous boy
Episode 3 - Just a Tutor
Episode 4 - BLOCKED </3
Episode 5 - Good Days
Episode 6 - Apology DENIED
Episode 7 - Start from the beginning
Episode 8 - Apology pending
Episode 9 - Meet Kianta (wc)
Episode 10 - Date? Date!
Episode 11 - Label? Boyfriend & Girlfriend
Episode 12 - who?
Episode 13 - NOOOOOO
Episode 14 - Arcade Date <3
Episode 15 - EXAMS NOOOOOOOO
Episode 16 - RAINNNNNNNN
Episode 17 - tba
Episode 18 - tba
Episode 19 - tba
Episode 20 - Graduation… this sucks
FILLER EPISODES
Episode 2 season 1 - I almost got sent to the hospital
Episode 5 season 1 - Anime binging
Episode 10 season 1 - HAPPY HALLOWEEN
Episode 11 season 1 - HALLOWEEN PARTY
Episode 5 season 2 - Good days
Episode 13 season 2 - NOOOOOO
EXTRA - tba
#scaramouche#scaramouche x reader#genshin x reader#genshin impact#kunimix#scaramouche smau#female reader#genshin smau
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get him back! → theburntchip
pairing , theburntchip x youtuber!reader
summary , where, in lieu of yours and chip’s reconnection, fans find out how it happened, and just why you ended things in the first place.
part one (bad idea, right?)
oh, i wanna get him back! 'cause then again, i really miss him, and it makes me real sad
🔴 Y/n L/n Talks On Breakup, Reconnection, The Launch Of Her Brand, & More! FULL POD EP.77 -Saving Grace
join premiere!
LIVE CHAT !
user: stop i’m actually gonna cry ☹️☹️☹️
user: I KNEW THOSE TWITTER B WORDS WERE WRONG I KNEW THEY DIDNT END BADLY
user: that’s so lala land of them
user: “if i ever complained, i’d be the nagging girlfriend” NO BABY 😭😭😭😭
user: never thought i’d say it but i’m glad they broke up bcs if they hadn’t done it then, it would’ve been MESSY messy
user: off topic but can we please talk about how pretty she is :(
user: “if he ever complained about you, i would’ve given him a belting” YES GRACE 👏👏👏
user: WHY DIDNT WE GET Y/N ON HERE SOONER OMGGGGGG I LOVE THIS DUO SM
user: Sending love from Brazil! XX 🇧🇷🇧🇷❤️❤️
user: stop that’s so sad ☹️
user: she’s so real for the anxiety thing
LIVE CHAT !
user: i feel like i’m watching a tv show
user: “i don’t want to lose this again” and when i start sobbing????
user: ok but is the dick game good
user: HE SWIPED UP ON A COSTA TOASTIE ☠️
user: nah he’s down BAD me too but like 😭
user: he def would’ve thrown a temper tantrum if she didn’t respond
user: grace booing is so real i wanted a kissing in the rain screaming ‘i love you’ confession
user: her smile when she said she’s happy now man they’re literally my parents ☹️
user: Love you both X ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
user: ❤️🩹❤️🩹❤️🩹❤️🩹
user: the world is healing
user: NAH MAN SWEAR THATS CHIPS BOICE COMING IN NOW
LIVE CHAT !
user: i’m actually gonna cry i missed them sm ☹️😭
user: the camera switching to her looking at him with heart eyes after calling him a bellend is so funny GET HER ASS 👏
user: chip is the new an*rew t*te 🙏
user: oh how i missed him calling her lady and missus
user: he’s the leader of the sassy man epidemic oh lord
user: OMG I FORGOT WHEN SHE YSED TO GO ON COFFEE DATES WITH HIS MUM
user: leave my girl and her spotify playlists alone
user: this has literally made my year
user: just in time for y/n’s fall vids
[tagged: savinggracepod , gkbarry_ , theburntchip]
❤️ liked by georgeclarkeey, georgebxggs, and 98,992 others
yourusername mum! mum! i made it! i’m on saving grace!!!!!! (and i figured i deserved at least one pic of chip from the launch x)
user that episode was the funniest thing ever i can’t even i nearly pissed myself when grace pretended to spank u with the paddle 😭😭😭
user mother ur so gorg i’m speechless
user you know the content is gonna slap when y/n l/n is there
user im so obsessed with u pls
user CAL AND CHIP AT THE FUNCTION SIR 👏🙇♀️
user best video in youtube history methinks
gkbarry_ loved having you on babe, even if the boss man gatecrashed 🫶❤️
yourusername he doesn’t like feeling left out smh
theburntchip oh alright then
max_balegde ICONIC!!!!!!
user MY ROMAN EMPIRE
user i hope you know that twt is in flames rn
user i gen teared up a bit when you talked about the breakup 🥹
user icons only
[tagged: ynapparel , nellarose , theburntchip]
❤️ liked by landonorris, behzinga and 97,872 others
yourusername self representing by wearing @ ynapparel the past (and every) week 😩🤭 featuring the love of my life & chip ig…
theburntchip wow alright
theburntchip i thought you were a g 😔
yourusername oops sorry babe
theburntchip we’re over smh
yourusername oh no… what a shame ☹️ anyway… hot girl winter!!!!!!
theburntchip the fits are fire though 😮💨
yourusername as always x
user EATING SLAYING DEVOURING
user OH MY GODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
user forever obsessed with u
user graduated from cuntingtion university with an phd in slaying
nellarose love you bae x
calfreezy chip looking dashing as per usual
theburntchip aye thank you brotha
nellarose AYYYY LOOKING SEXY 🔥🔥🔥🔥
yourusername ALL YOU BABY 💋💋💋
ynapparel looking good and dressed to kill 😉😇🩷
user face card NEVER declines
lissiemackintosh this barbie is my mother
user ur so real lissie
faithlouisak doll 🤩
alice_hez 😍🔥🖤
user WHATS THE SQUARE ROOT OF 64?????
user angel girl 🤍
centralcee 😮💨🔥🔥🔥🔥
user NAHHH HES BRAVE COMMENTING ON THE POST W HER BOYFRIEND
user CENCH GET OUTTA HERE MAN
user SIRENSIRENSIREN Y/N BABY RUN!!!!!
user OH??????
user wait am i missing smth why are we freaking out
user @ user cench has always been lowk flirting with y/n, like she interviewed him at some event last yr and he was being so flirty and obviously she was giving him blank wall back BUT when her and chip broke up he got even WORSE like man was always in her comments tryna chat her up and she entertained it a lil but now the bitch is back and he’s bold
user NAH MAN GTFO WE JUST GOT CHIP BACK IN THE PICTURE WE CANT HAVE U RUINING THAT
theburntchip just posted to their story
#theburntchip x reader#theburntchip imagine#theburntchip fic#theburntchip x y/n#youtube x redaer#youtube#british youtube x reader#british youtube#british youtuber x reader#uk youtube#calfreezy#gk barry#max balegde#nella rose
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Cyborg, the Greatest Titan
(Titans (2023) #7- Cyborg shows why no one can bring him down)
So there was once a seemingly innocuous question asked on Titans Twitter:
Though some used it to prop up their faves, it turned into a serious and big discussion: Who is the Greatest Titan, epitomizing what it means to be a Titan the most?
There were a variety of answers, majority being one of Dick, Donna, Starfire, Raven, or even Wally. But what I noticed was the surprising lack of one answer: Cyborg.
One of the most popular Titans, whom DC clearly sees as one of the Titans Trinity (upper right corner):
(The Promotional Art for DC Comics' Dawn of DC Initiative by Dan Mora. Cyborg was to chosen to represent the Titans along with Nightwing and Starfire)
Whose removal from Titans lore caused a massive fan uproar, yet among Titans Twitter, probably the most dedicated of Titan fans, Cyborg's name was barely mentioned as a candidate to be the Greatest Titan:
Victor Stone who at his lowest, found the Titans, a team who became the family he needed who loved him without judgement:
(New Teen Titans #1 - Cyborg meeting the Titans for the first time)
(Teen Titans 5x10 "Go" - The prequel episode where all the Titans meet. Cyborg is ashamed of his cyber-mechanics but Beast Boy repeatedly assures him that they are cool and shouldn't be hidden)
The man who took what the Titans did for him and made it his mission to be that for others.
(New Teen Titans #22 and Titans Vol 2 #21 - (Left) Cyborg realizes the Titans mean so much to him because they are his friends who helped him not feel alone & (Right) Cyborg's internal monologue about how Titans taught him being part of team and accepting help from others was a good thing)
(Teen Titans 5x10 "Go" - Assured by Beast Boy, Cyborg tell an ashamed Raven she's a freak among freaks and fits in just fine, a nice callback to his NTT origin)
(Teen Titans (2003) #1- Cyborg relaunches the Teen Titans to include the upcoming generation of teen heroes so they can have a place to grieve Donna's death & find acceptance)
(Teen Titans 3x12 - "Titans East" - Cyborg helps establish the first off-shoot of the Teen Titans: Titans East)
He transformed the team from simply being a group of former sidekicks to a safe haven for all teen heroes
(Teen Titans #100 and Dark Nights: Death Metal: The Last Stories of the DC Universe: Together - showcasing the multi-generational roster of Titans that Cyborg helped establish)
(Teen Titans 5x12- Titans Together - The global roster of Teen Titans that Cyborg helped to create that expanded from the initial off-shot of Titans East also started by Cyborg)
The Titans Are About A Team of Teens That Grew Into A Family
(Dark Nights: Death Metal: The Last Stories of the DC Universe: Together - Donna talking about how much the Titans grew from a team of 5 into multi-generational families)
A Family of Teenagers that not only help each other in the struggles of being a hero but also the struggles of being an adolescent, having turbulent emotions in a turbulent world
(Dark Nights: Death Metal: The Last Stories of the DC Universe: Together - Donna talking about how much the Titans had it tougher than the League because they had been facing Justice-League-level problems since they were kids, and yet every time still came out on top)
And who has committed to this mission more than Cyborg?
Victor who fought for the team when everyone including past leaders like Dick and Donna walked away:
(Titans/Young Justice: Graduation Day and Titans (2008) #21 - Left: After Donna's death, Dick decides to disband the Titans and everyone walked away. Right: After Final Crisis and Prometheus' attack on Roy, nearly all the Titans have left the current Titans roster, but Cyborg stayed fighting for the team)
Why: Because he knew how much future teen heroes needed the Titans. To guide them and give them a home as the Titans did for him long ago
(Titans/Young Justice: Graduation Day and Titans East Special- Left: After Donna's funeral, Cyborg sees members of Young Justice, especially Cassie, not handling Donna's death well and generally feeling worthless and he decides to restart the Titans. Right: Cyborg tried to convince the New Teen Titans and Roy to start up a new team of Teen Titans to help more teen heroes, but they all refused)
Stubbornly keeping Titans alive when everyone else wouldn't, allowing Titans to reach their greatest potential: a global network so any teen of any generation can find a home
(Dark Nights: Death Metal: The Last Stories of the DC Universe: Together - Titans across generations have gathered to join the fight against Batman Who Laughs)
A man who because the Titans gained utter defiance in who he is, saving not only himself from despair, but also became devoted to giving other teens that same courage, inspiring them to show that they are not freaks nor they are ever alone, thus changing so many lives (go to 2:38 for the start of the iconic speech, but I recommend starting at 2:17)
youtube
(Teen Titans 3x13 - "Titans East" - Cyborg's defiance in who he is prevented him from falling to Blood's mind control, defeating Blood saving his fellow Titans, and thus saving the day)
Victor is not only a candidate to be the Greatest Titan, but ultimately is the Most Deserving.
Cyborg is the Greatest Titan, the Lynchpin, without whom the Titans will not work and ultimately cannot because he believes in it the most and thus embodies its ethos the best
(Teen Titans #20- Tim Drake realizing how essential Cyborg is to the team and how he changed Tim and helped Tim after the death of Donna)
The Greatest Character in Fiction, An Inspiration, A Legend: BOOYAH!!!
#cyborg#victor stone#vic stone#teen titans#teen titans 2003#starfire#robin#beast boy#raven#raven teen titans#new teen titans#dc robin#wally west#kid flash#the flash#wonderfam#wonder girl#nightwing#dick grayson#titans dc#dc comics#dc#donna troy#bumbleebee#teen titan#teen titans east#titans west#Youtube#cassie sandsmark#superboy dc
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nonidol!kevin moon x f!reader
another summer break, another annual trip to the lake! except, it seems like when you and kev get there, you'll have to make some tweaks to the original rescue protocol.
▷ genre, warnings. childhood friends 2 lovers, fluff, hurt/comfort, humor, swearing, motherly meddling and matchmaking, shirtless kevin..., kissing, talks of academic expectations/pressure/insecurity/and lack of fulfillment, kim seokjin is my favorite plot device, this could technically be slow burn, pining-ish?, im sorry joshua + serena, little to no interactions with the other boyz 😔
▷ word count. 29.0k (...hah)
this is the sixth installment of the love in unity series! reading the prev fics is not required, but i do encourage it :] all prev yns will be referred to as _!yn
a/n: return to summer with me 😌 or for those of u on the other side of the world, we can give summer an early welcome :') treat her w kindness pls </3 hope u enjoy!!
EPISODE ONE (PILOT): DON’T YOU LOVE FORESHADOWING?
"IT still feels weird, man." Kevin Moon brushed his hand over the surface of his newly cropped hair, freshly cut specifically for this summer break, just earlier this week. He probably should have gotten it done before he took all those pictures with his graduating friends, but life had been busy as of late.
Jacob Bae, best friend, roommate, and one of the recent graduates, chuckled from the other side of the video chat. "I'm sure it does. But hey, it looks good, so it's not like you have anything to worry about."
Kevin glanced over at the car where his dad was gassing up. His mom was in the back seat, waving her arm out the window to beckon him back to the vehicle. "Thanks," he grinned. "Looks like my mom is telling me to come back. This is probably the last time I'll have signal for a few weeks."
Just behind Kevin was the little gas station he and his parents stopped at for snacks and the last leg of their drive. It was tradition that every summer his family made the trek to their lakeside cabin a few hours out of Vancouver. Except last summer, Kevin couldn't make it; in contrast, this summer, Kevin and his parents were going without Kevin's younger sister. Usually, there were a couple other families that were there at the same time, too, who Kevin had grown up with. It was usually a grand time.
Kevin adjusted the bag of snacks he'd purchased from the store that hung on his arm as he made his way back to the car.
"Make sure to take pics! And say hi to your mom for me," said Jacob.
"Why don't you say hi to her yourself, Jacob-ah?" Kevin's mom chided teasingly as Kevin took his place in the passenger seat next to his dad. Ever since Kevin and Jacob had met at that one, fateful out-of-country student mixer at university, neither of them shut up about each other to their own families. It was like finding a needle in a haystack, locating a fellow Korean-Canadian.
Kevin passed his phone back to his mom, and he heard Jacob's immediate, "Hi imo! How are you?"
"I've been doing well. Wah, you look so glowy," his mom marveled, and Kevin felt her nudge him in the shoulder. "Hyungseo-ah, maybe you should get a girlfriend, too, if this is how radiant Jacob looks after so long."
Jacob's warm chuckle contrasted Kevin's groan. The latter rubbed his hand down his face with an embarrassed wince. "Eomma," he said weakly, sliding down in his seat. Not this again.
The car began to roll out of the gas station and he lowered his window to catch the breeze as they went. He already recognized the pattern of trees in this area, and his heart fluttered at the thought of being so close to childhood again. The lake was always a favorite place of his.
"—Kevin mentioned something about other families being there?"
"Oh, yes. We're always there with the Ln family, and more recently, Kevin's cousin—you know Yuna, right? She and her husband Seokjin meet us there with their kids now."
Kevin rested his elbow along the edge of the window. "Uncle Seokjin is an interesting character, Cobie," he mused. "I think you'd get along."
"Seokjin gets along with everyone," his dad chimed in.
"You know who you should get along with, Kevin?—" Kevin already knew where his mom was going with this, "—Yn Ln! You're not gonna be shy after spending so long away from her, are you?"
Jacob's voice echoed in the car. "Who's Yn Ln?"
Kevin squirmed in his seat. "Just—a family friend. Mom, can we please not make this a big deal?" And why in the world would he be shy around his childhood best friend? Three years couldn’t have changed a person that much, could it? You were cute—but in a dorky way—that was how he had always seen you.
She sent him an innocent look. "What? I don't know what you're talking about."
"You know what I'm talking about," he said, twisting around in his seat to send her a pleading look. "I don't wanna make her uncomfortable, especially since… y'know… we're not kids anymore?"
His mom made a sound of disapproval, but relented. "Aish, fine. I won't say anything; I promise."
A beat of silence. Then from the phone, "I still have no clue what's going on."
The twins were being a pain again. Most of the time, since you were away at college, you actually missed the twin hellspawn, but you should have known that bliss would shatter the moment you had to endure another five hour car ride with them.
"—MAMA, CONNOR IS BEING A JERK—"
"WELL, ALICE WOULDN'T SHARE THE GOLDFISH!"
The noise-canceling headphones weren't working. Usually, they worked substantially well when trying to block out the frat party noises at school, but they weren't holding up well against adolescent discourse. You would have thought that once they had grown out of toddler-hood, they would calm down a little, but sibling rivalry prevailed.
You shucked your useless headphones off and twisted around in your seat to peer into the backseat. "Here, have mine," you said, dropping your bag of goldfish into your little brother's lap.
Connor's eyes lit up in delight. "Thanks, Yn!"
Your ears rang as you turned back to the front.
The drive up to the lake house was something you and your family did every summer, except, you hadn't gone two summers ago for a summer internship. It was a tradition completed with other families—namely the Moons, who were longtime family friends out of Vancouver. You hadn't seen Kevin, their only son who was your age, in two years because of your conflicting schedules. It would have happened again this year, but your misfortune had you internship-less. Then again, a trip to the lake was never a bad thing.
You leaned your head back against your seat rest to enjoy the rare moment of silence in the car. Already, you could begin to point out the familiar scenery out of your window.
“I heard we’re gonna be getting new neighbors this year,” you heard your mother say from the front row, breaking the brief quiet.
You blinked out of your daze, shifting in your seat and to give momentary relief to your aching behind. “Oh, really? Do we know who they are?”
“Aw, so Uncle Jin and Auntie Yuna aren’t coming to the lake with us?” Alice pouted from the backseat.
“No, Uncle and Auntie are both still coming up with us,” you dad piped up from the driver’s seat. He caught your eyes through the rear view mirror. “Their little ones are coming, too. We’re just gonna have even more people this year.”
“Should be fun,” you murmured. You leaned down to rummage through the backpack at your feet for your backup bag of snacks (because some part of your brain just knew that the twins would forget how to share).
“I can’t wait to see Kevin!” This was Connor; you could feel the car shake as he bounced up and down in his seat. “I’ve been wanting to show him my new helicopter—”
Your eyebrows furrowed. “Con, you brought the helicopter?”
“Yeah, and what about it?”
Before further argument could erupt between you and your brother, your mom stepped in. “Speaking of Kevin…”
You could feel the coming conversation like there were dark gray storm clouds forming in the distance—impending doom, you liked to think. You fumbled with the opening of your chip bag. “Mama, could you possibly, by any chance, not try and set me and Kevin up anymore?” There, you’d said it. It was out in the open.
“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” your mother sniffed. “I only think that you and Kevin would be very nice together! It’s already so convenient that our families are long-time friends, and—”
“Mama,” you emphasized. “I don’t wanna get into a relationship for convenience's sake.” Your skin was already beginning to heat. Having known the Moons for so long, as well as having kids the same age, your mom and his mom had harped on the opportunity to bring your families together through more than one way.
“She just doesn’t want to get into a relationship at all!” Your little brother cackled.
You sent him a dull look over your shoulder. “And after I gave you my goldfish?” The situation concerning relationships wasn’t as Connor so bluntly put it; rather, you simply had yet to find the right person, as it was for many people. A relationship would have been nice, but when it came, then it would come. Plus, you were pretty sure that Kevin wasn’t the most comfortable with being matchmade with you by the Mother Matchmakers either. That was what the pact was for, anyway.
“I’m just saying that Kevin is a smart, good-looking young man,” your mother teased.
You hadn’t seen him in almost three years, but how much could three years change a guy? Maybe you would admit that he was cute. If you hadn’t known him since he wore Cars diapers, maybe you would have had a crush on him. “No matchmaking,” you repeated.
Your mother sighed melodramatically. “Fine. No matchmaking with Kevin.”
“Thank you,” you said, settling into your seat. Something stirred in the back of your mind, though. For some reason, you had a feeling that this wasn’t the end of this conversation. But as you turned your attention back to the scenery whizzing past you, you let all dealings with matchmaking, boys, and relationships sink to the very back of your mind.
EPISODE TWO: IT’S CALLED AN AMBUSH
THANKS to the convenience of no signal, you could safely attempt to forget about the internship you hadn’t landed this year. The entire debacle had been a headache and a half, but the residual sadness still lingered. There was something about the lakehouse, though, that gave you hope that you could get over it. While you wouldn’t spend this summer doing something “productive” toward your career, you would at least be presented with a pleasant alternative.
Your dad pulled the family SUV into the gravel driveway of your family lakehouse, and childhood flooded back to you. All of the dark oak walls and browned window sills and wildflowers blooming in the front walkway among the grass… You could remember crashing your bike into that one bush to the side of the house where the rain gutter now stood hugging the building.
The twins had fallen asleep sometime between the matchmaking conversation and here, which left the car in a sort of serenity that matched the surroundings. Your house in particular was one of the few houses that was perched a little higher than the lakeshore. There were a couple around the lake that sat directly on the water with docks built into their lower levels though.
You notched your car door open, shouldered your backpack, then quietly lowered your car’s seat. Connor, who was sitting directly behind you, had his head tilted to the side, mouth wide open to catch flies as he slept. With a cheeky smile, you snapped a picture of him. Once tucking your phone away, you climbed into the back to shake him and Alice awake.
“Hey, we’re here,” you murmured. Your parents were already beginning to unload the car of your supplies for the next couple of weeks.
Your brother’s eyes fluttered open, and his arms stretched over his head as he began to compute his surroundings. “Mmm… I’m hungry,” he babbled and smacked his lips together.
Yep, this one was awake.
You patted his face in your version of sisterly affection as you leaned over him to get to his twin. “You gotta wait, dude. You’re gonna ruin your dinner.”
He rubbed his hand over his face. “You always sound like Mom when you say that.”
“I’ll take that as a compliment,” you huffed. You nudged your sister. “Hey, Alice. Up, hm?”
She shifted in her seat, eyes still closed. “Are we here yet?”
“Yeah, hon. We’re here.” With your task completed, you backed out of the car to make space for the twins to climb out after you. You took a step backwards, your foot catching against something and making you tumble into the person directly behind you. “Ah! Shi—”
“Language!” Your mom called from the other side of the car. “Hi Kevin! Wow, did you get a haircut?”
Kevin…?
You recognized the warm chuckle behind you, and the arms helping to steady you patted your shoulders in greeting. “I did!”
When you whirled around, your mouth stretched in a grin, but you didn’t expect to come face to face with the confident stature of the man behind you. He was in a tank top and shorts, which were definitely proper attire for the humid temperature, and yet, your brain was thinking about the amount of arm muscle there was. Oh, and of course, the cropped black hair. You could have sworn his jaw got sharper, too… This was not the timid-faced Kevin Moon—rising freshman in college—you last recalled.
“Kevin!” Connor’s body rocketed past you and crashed into Kevin’s legs.
Kevin bent down slightly to ruffle your little brother’s hair. “Hey, little man! What’s good?”
“I wanna show you my helicopter—!”
“Connor,” Alice said as she hopped out of the car, “Mama wants you to help bring in your stuff, and then you can show Kevin your helicopter.”
Connor’s mouth gaped open like a fish’s. “Wha—what about Yn?”
“Well, that’s just what Mama said, so,” your little sister said matter-of-factly. She raised a hand in a wave to Kevin. “Hi!”
Kevin returned the gesture with a sweet smile. “Hi, Alice.”
You and Kevin watched as your twin siblings raced into the lakehouse with their backpacks strapped onto their bodies. You could hear their hollering from out here as they fought over who would get the top bunk this year.
“They’ve gotten taller,” Kevin commented, drawing your attention back to him.
You brushed your hair from your face. “Yeah, you should’ve seen my reaction when I came back home and they were like, not small enough where I could trip over them anymore.”
The two of you shared a small laugh, and you held one arm with your other. You hadn’t realized how a few years could reset things between the two of you, but you supposed it was also attributed to the fact that three years away at college could lead to a lot of difference and a lot of growth.
“So what’s new with you?” You asked him and nudged his arm with your elbow. “Have you been working out?” You blurted, but ran with it.
Kevin smiled, reaching back to cup the nape of his neck with that sheepishness you recognized as something distinctly Kevin. Maybe things weren’t so different. “Hah, yeah actually. Is it that noticeable?”
You looked him up and down with what you hoped he saw as teasing and not you actually checking him out. “Yeah, dude. You look good though.”
“Really? Thanks, Yn. I appreciate it.” He stuck his hands in the pockets of his shorts. "You look good, too—and oh my god, I have so much to catch you up on—"
"Hyungseo! Stop hogging Yn and come in to help with dinner." Just a little ways down the path, Kevin’s mom peered out from the front porch of the Moons’ house. The houses in this neighborhood were a little more spread out than the average suburban street, but their house had always been the closest to yours.
You could have sworn you saw a dusting of pink on your friend’s cheekbones. “I’m not hogging her,” he groaned. He turned back to you, throwing a thumb in the direction of his house. “I’ll see you guys over at ours in a few then?”
You gave a nod. “For sure. My mom and I marinated a couple things for tonight this morning, so we’ll be bringing those over.”
“Sweet,” he grinned, already backpedaling toward his house. “See ya, Yn!”
“Bye, Kevin,” you chuckled and bounded up toward your house.
Once everyone in your household had settled in for the most part, your dad corralled your siblings over to the Moon house, while you and your mom brought over your family’s offerings of tonight’s dinner. Instead of entering through their front door, you simply bypassed the invisible property line between your houses and found Kevin and his dad firing up the barbeque on the back lawn.
Kevin looked up from the box of aluminum foil in his hands and dropped it onto the table. "Oh, auntie! Let me get that for you," he said, meeting you in the middle and taking the tray out of your mom's hands.
"Thank you," she said to him. "How has school been, Kevin? Remind me again—you're a…?"
"Photography major," he replied. The three of you swept past Kevin's dad on your way up to the Moons' house.
"Ah, how's that going for you?"
"It's going well—" Your mom slid the screen door open and you all deposited your shoes to the side before entering the kitchen. "—I should be able to graduate two quarters early, which is nice."
Your mom nodded her head. "That's good, that's good. Katherine, it's nice to see you again!"
As your mom shuffled over to the sink where Kevin's mom was washing a colander of cabbage, you and Kevin set the trays down on the kitchen island.
You heard Kevin's gasp of delight when he lifted the foil off his. "No way. I love your mom's short ribs so much," he said, tipping his head back with his eyes closed.
You laughed at his reaction. "Me, too dude. It's never the same when I try to recreate it at school."
"Oh, for sure," he agreed. He cocked his head to the side, a frown coming into his face. "These should probably go back out to the grill then, huh."
You considered the two trays of meat before you. "You're right."
You both covered the trays back over and began to make your way back out to the lawn.
"Has Connor showed you his helicopter yet?" You asked Kevin while you slid your shoes back on.
The screen door slid shut behind him with his other arm carrying his tray. "He did." Kevin brightened, "It's cool. That kid should go into aviation or engineering."
"That's what I'm thinking," you said. "Though, he's not the greatest at math, but I guess he still has a long way to go before he even needs to consider all that."
He nodded, sighing. "That's true. The twins have a long way to go. Crazy how far we've gotten, y'know?"
You both dropped the marinated meat trays over by Kevin's dad, only to greet your dad on the way down to help out. You were sure that you and Kevin were needed up at the house anyway; your dad had mentioned something about having Connor and Alice start on the batch of kimchi. You hoped he had set up some newspaper this time to avoid a mess.
"My sister says your porch swing broke last year," Kevin said as he followed you back into the kitchen.
"Oh yeah!" You snorted. "Pro tip: don't try to fit two families on that thing. Not a good idea."
The moms directed you both over to the fruits and vegetables on the counter that still needed to be prepped, and you picked up a knife, and Kevin a peeler.
Kevin's brows knitted together as he tossed and caught an asian pear with one hand. "You guys tried to fit both families on that thing? It could barely handle two people the last time I remember."
"Hey, in our defense," you started, already giggling at the memory, "we wanted a cool picture, but then we ended up almost putting a hole through our porch. Lesson learned."
"Lesson learned, indeed." He shook his head as he shucked the pretty ring of golden peel he'd gotten from the pear into the paper bag beside him. "Is it fixed now?"
"Should be," you said. You used the blade of your knife to help coax the peel of the red onion off, then diligently began to take the rest off. "We need a maximum occupancy sign to go with it."
He laughed. "Something like 'less than four people' or something?"
"I think it can handle four people!"
His eyebrows arched high. "You wanna test that theory?"
You glanced up from your diced onions for just a second to meet his gaze. "Uhm no. But you are definitely welcome to."
"Oh, no, no! I'm not getting looped into this solo again like you did with the tire swing that one year."
"Okay, that time wasn't my fault! You said that you bet we could ride it together without breaking the tree branch, and I said—"
Your thought train cut off when the doorbell rang. Both yours and Kevin's heads perked up at the sound and darted in the direction like a pair of meerkats. Even from this room, you could hear the front door being opened and the commotion firing up. There was only one family left to join the party, and you knew exactly who had come to make his presence known.
In minimal time, a lanky man with dark brown bangs and a magazine-cover-worthy face barged into the kitchen with his hands raised, full of grocery bags, and a child riding in a carrier on his chest. "Hello, everyone! Your favorite, most handsome uncle has arrived."
"Hi, Uncle Jin," both you and Kevin chorused, as Kevin's mom took the grocery bags from him with thanks. Your mom must have been the one who opened the door since she had gone into the other room to monitor the twins and their kimchi.
"Hello, children—wow," Kim Seokjin said as he made eyes at Kevin's arms, giving them a little squish. "Close the gyms, everyone. What have they been feeding you at college?"
Kevin's face reddened. "It's nothing, really."
"Nothing?" Seokjin made eye contact with you. "You're seeing this, too, right?"
You swallowed your laugh, but you couldn't suppress your smile. "I'm seeing it, too," you confirmed. You set your knife down and gently ran your finger over baby Leena's head; you wondered how she was still asleep with how loud her father's voice was. "Awh, she's adorable."
Your uncle by association put his hands on his hips. "Fatherhood is great, but let me tell you," he said with flair, "after two kids, I don't want anymore. I think I've seen enough dirty diapers for you both combined."
Kevin laughed. "I'm sure Yuna-noona's on the same page."
"Yes, your cousin and I are definitely on the same page," Jin confirmed while clasping a hand on Kevin's shoulder. His eyes widened, and he gave the muscle beneath his fingers a squeeze. "Jesus—"
"Jin! Do you know where the bag with the formula is?" That was Yuna, Kevin's cousin, calling from the next room over. Soon, her head poked in through the doorway, and her mouth curved into a delighted smile at the sight of familiar faces. "Oh, hi everyone!"
"I think it's in the red colored bag, babe," Jin said as he turned away from you and Kevin and waddled over to where his wife was.
"That's what I thought, too, but I can't find it."
With the young couple now off in search of their bag of baby formula, you and Kevin were again left to yourselves with the fruits and vegetables.
You scooped the diced onions up with one hand and the blade of your knife into an empty bowl for later. "Well, that was…"
"Quite an entrance?" Kevin finished. You could still see the rosiness in his cheeks. "Yup."
"You can always count on Uncle Jin to liven up a place."
"Oh, definitely." Kevin picked up another pear to peel; they would probably either be sliced up for the kids to eat or maybe used to make a dessert later. Something of the sort, at least. "Now where were we?"
You raised your brows as you picked up a carrot. "I think we were talking about how you broke the tire swing in seventh grade."
The evening progressed swiftly with everyone's combined efforts in throwing dinner together. By the time the sun was about to make its descent into the horizon, all three families were moved out onto the back lawn with chairs set up and meats cooking on the grill. There was something beautiful about the lake at this hour—then again, there was always something beautiful about the lake. You couldn’t put your finger on it, but even the way the mosquitoes danced in the waning sunlight made your chest feel warm and fuzzy.
If you strained your vision a little, you could even make out the shapes of people on the opposite shoreline beginning to light campfires of their own. Most of the people who lived around the perimeter of the lake sublet their properties during the non-vacation seasons like your family, the Moons, and the Kims. Then, when the time came, they would return to their lakehouse hideaways for much needed rejuvenation.
As golden hour painted the landscape glorious shades of auburn and butter, you caught your mother making her way toward you out of the corner of your eye.
“Yn-ah,” she said to you with a plate of the fruit that you and Kevin had cut earlier in her hands. She gestured for you to take it from her, then nodded up over to the house on the other side of the Moons’ place. “Take the twins and go welcome our new guests.”
You furrowed your brows. “New guests?” When you followed her gaze, you saw that the house next door had acquired a new car in its driveway. You definitely didn’t recognize it, but you managed to spot what looked like someone disappearing in the front door of the house.
“They’re one of the new families, I think,” she told you. She then gave you a little nudge, urging, “Go. We’re still working on dinner anyways.”
You glanced between the plate of fruit in your possession, then searched the back lawn for the hellspawn. When you located their whereabouts (skipping through a pair of hula hoops over by the big oak tree), you marched over to them to repeat your mother’s instructions.
“Oi!” You called out.
Alice looked over at you as she stopped her skipping. “I don’t want fruit,” she said when she saw what you were holding.
You stopped just short of Connor’s hula hoop circumference. “It’s not for you. Mama wants us to go say hi to the new neighbors. Come on.”
“Do we have to?”
“If I do, then yes. And Mama said so.” Plus, you were not planning to go alone upon any circumstance. Your social anxiety could not take showing up at a stranger’s doorstep alone and with fruit.
The twins dropped their hula hoops and begrudgingly trudged after you. No child could trump the “Mom said so” card. At least, not in this household.
With your siblings following after you like two ducklings to a Mother Goose, Kevin saw the line of you walking past from where he was stationed beside his dad. His eyes zipped from you, the kids, and the plate of fruit, then cocked his head to the side in bemused inquiry.
You inclined your head toward the house you aimed for in the distance and lifted the plate of fruit as if that was enough explanation.
He gave a grave nod for your sake, teasing of course, then held up his free hand in a thumb’s up for encouragement.
Nonetheless, you and your siblings carried on.
The lakehouse on the Moons’ other side was similar to all the others around the lake: dark wood walls, doors encased in a protective screen door, grass and flowers growing out of the cracks where the house met the earth. You could feel your siblings converge on you, nearly hiding behind you, as you all approached the front door. It wasn’t that the house looked scary in any way—it was just the prospect of new people that was the scary part. You were sure this family was just as friendly as everyone else, but it didn’t hurt to be a little nervous.
When the three of you reached the front door, you raised your hand to ring the doorbell.
You could hear the echo of the bell inside the house, followed swiftly by a man’s voice, “I’ll get it!”
Footsteps drawing closer… then the locks came undone, and finally, the main door inside the screen swung open.
“Hi,” greeted the young man on the other side.
You paused when his face became clearer after opening the screen door. He was, to put it bluntly, awfully pretty. Dark hair swept back out of his face and behind his ear, a prince’s facial features, and a smile that was as beautiful as the golden hour greeted you and your siblings. Even his voice was soft.
Alice held onto the side of your shorts pocket. “You're pretty.”
The man made an expression of humble surprise, and heat rose to your neck. “Sorry,” you stammered. “We’re from a couple doors down and we wanted to welcome you to the lake. These are for you and your family.” You managed to pass the plate over to him without being any more embarrassing.
He accepted the offering graciously. “Oh, wow. Thank you so much! That’s so thoughtful.”
You placed your hands on either of your siblings’ backs to push them forward slightly. “I’m Yn, and these are my little siblings, Alice and Connor.”
Your siblings chimed in their hellos to the pretty man.
His eyes narrowed in upturned crescent moons, smile widening. “Well it’s really nice to meet you guys. I’m Joshua, but my friends call me Josh or Shua.”
EPISODE THREE: MAMMA MIA! HERE WE GO AGAIN…
IT turned out that your mother had an ulterior motive for sending you and your siblings to greet the newcomers. She had popped up behind you soon after Joshua had introduced himself to invite him and his family to have dinner with you. You could sniff out the conspiracy from a mile away, but you still wanted to give your mom the benefit of the doubt.
When the first night passed without anything happening, though, you slowly let your guard down. (Rookie mistake.)
Everyone crashed into bed after cleaning up dinner. The move up to the lake was a tiring one, and the promise of an early start the next morning proved to be more than enough encouragement to hit the hay.
You were on the living room couch with Alice sitting on the floor between your legs the next day. It was late morning by this time, and you and your siblings had just woken up less than an hour ago. Your dad was still asleep, and your mom? Well, you weren’t really sure where he was.
“Ow, can you stop tugging?” Alice whined under her breath, her hand rocketing up to the back of her head to stop your hands.
You paused your movement for the third time in the past fifteen minutes. “It wouldn’t hurt this bad if you would just let me run a comb through it.”
“The brush works fine if you use it correctly!”
You exhaled sharply and pressed your lips together. There was never any rest between your two little siblings, whether it was amongst themselves or against you. You supposed you could just suck it up for the time being; it wasn’t often that you got to braid your little sister’s hair. She usually just liked to leave it down.
You heard the backdoor open and shut behind you, and the both of you turned your heads to see who it was. Your mom entered the house with perspiration gleaming on her face as she took off her sun hat and tossed it onto one of the dining room chairs.
“Hi Mama,” the two of you said, one after the other.
Your mom settled onto the couch cushion next to you. “Hi girls. Is your brother and dad up yet?”
“Connor’s with Uncle Jin and Aunt Yuna,” said Alice. “Daddy’s still asleep though.”
“Mm,” she hummed. She combed her fingers through her sweat-soaked hair. “It’s a warm morning out,” she murmured, then quickly added, “hey you.” She knocked her hand against your arm.
“Hm?” You asked as you finished up Alice’s braid and tied it off with the blue Cinnamoroll hair tie she’d chosen. You patted her back with your hand. “You’re done.”
Your little sister hopped to her feet. “Thanks!” She dashed away and out of the room—to where, you had no clue. You figured she knew where the food was if she was hungry.
You angled your body to squish your side against the couch cushions and face your mother. “What were you saying?”
“Ah, I was going to talk to you about the Joshua Hong boy.”
Joshua Hong. You didn’t realize you could hear a man’s name so often within twelve hours.
You made a gesture with your hand. “What about the Joshua Hong boy, Mom?”
“Well, isn’t he a handsome one?” She asked you enthusiastically, straightening in her seat. It was alarming how bright her expression became. “I spoke to his mom while Kevin and I were walking just now, and he’s only a few years older than you, you know.”
You heard a metaphorical record scratch. What? There was so much in that one sentence that you needed to unpack. You raised your hands to signal her to pause. “Wait, since when do you and Kevin take walks together?” What could they have been talking about? You knew Kevin was an exceptional conversationalist, but never in your time at the lake had you known of this interaction.
Your mother blinked. “Oh, we started the tradition when you didn’t come up with us that one year.”
“Tradition?” So this happened more than once? You didn’t know why you were so scandalized by this information—it was just Kevin after all. You knew your parents and even your siblings were all fond of him—of course they were. You were arguably even more fond of him, but that wasn’t the point. You hoped she hadn't said anything about you and him as an item at any point of time… you trusted that Kevin could handle that though; that was what the pact was for, after all.
“Why are you making such a big deal out of this?” She arched a brow. “But anyway, yes, so we bumped into Josh’s mom on the last leg around the lake, and she mentioned that he’s majoring in chemistry and planning to go into medicine. You guys might have something in common.”
You pursed your lips. Perhaps the two of you might have something to talk about, but your track was pre-veterinary rather than pre-med. There was probably a middle ground though... Maybe you were just being stubborn.
“Just make friends or something,” she said to you while standing up from the couch. “You need more of those.”
Your eyes shot wide open. “Hello? Mom?” Now that was simply uncalled for.
She chuckled impishly as she walked away and disappeared down the hall, leaving you to yourself. You were lucky neither of the twins were here to hear that burn.
It wasn’t much longer than a couple hours later that you found yourself on the backyard lawn space setting up the badminton net between two oak trees with Kevin’s assistance. Everyone was outside and awake, and the kids were all seated up on your house’s back porch munching on the watermelon that Yuna cut for them.
You tightened the string on one side of the net. “So he didn't kiss her?” You queried.
Kevin sputtered a laugh, yanking his side to test its integrity. “Yeah,” he said. “Isn’t it so funny? According to multiple sources, Sunwoo and Chanhee barged in at the perfect moment, and frankly—” Kevin raised his arms up in the air and let them fall for effect, “—ruined the moment.”
"Pfft.” You considered that for a moment. An almost kiss ruined by a comedically timed interruption from a guy drunk off liquor and love, and the friend tasked with dumping his ass at home. That was bad luck if you ever heard it. “And what about that other dude? The Hyunjae guy? Did he finally fix his eyesight?”
Your friend leaned back against his oak tree, ankles crossed over the other and arms braided over his chest. A pair of shades rested backwards on his head to complete his summer-worthy ensemble of shorts and T-shirt. “His literal eyesight is still shit, but yeah, he and HJ!Yn are together now. Took for-fucking-ever, but—”
“Language!” Jin yelled like a referee on the sideline of a soccer match. “We have children in the vicinity.”
Kevin brushed a hand through his hair. “Whoopsies, sorry!” He turned back to you. “Anyways, yes, they are finally together. Man, having someone watch my cursing makes it seem like Jacob is here with me.”
You noticed the fond twinkle in his eyes as he stared out at the still waters of the lake just down the way from you both. “You talk about this Jacob guy a lot,” you said to him. “I think I need to meet the person who’s threatening to knock me off the best friend pedestal.”
“He already has,” he jested.
You let out an indignant squawk. “Hurtful!”
Connor, watermelon juice smeared all around his mouth, added rather unnecessarily, “So you don’t want a partner and you don’t have friends. What do you have, Yn?”
You leveled a scowl at him. “An annoying little brother.”
“Hey!”
In a tone dryer than the Sahara Desert, Alice chimed in, “Guess that makes me the favorite twin.”
“I should tell you about Sangyeon. I need to yell about Sangyeon,” Kevin huffed indignantly, snapping his fingers as if the thought just hit him. You whipped your head back over. “Oh my god, dude, you know what happened at the graduation ceremony? It was like, straight out of a scene from a movie—!”
You never got to find out what was just like it was out of a movie, because your mom appeared in the distance with the Hongs. They all came wielding badminton racquets—how convenient. You didn’t mind the extra company, of course, and despite your stubbornness, you knew Joshua and his family were very nice people.
You caught the tail end of your mother’s conversation with Josh and his mom: “...Yn used to play badminton on the high school team. She could’ve gone to the Olympics if she really wanted to—”
Well, that was only partly true. Your team had gone to Nationals, but the Olympics was one step above Worlds. You liked to think you were pretty good at the sport, but you hoped your mom wasn’t talking up you and your abilities too much.
“Oh, wow. I’m a soccer person myself,” said Joshua good-naturedly. “I don’t really know much about badminton, but it seems like a really fun sport.”
"Yn's a great teacher. She taught the twins how to play." Ah, there it was.
When they were within a comfortable distance, you raised your hand in a wave. "Hi hello!"
"Hello Yn," Joshua's mom said back. "Hi Kevin."
Kevin dipped his head with a smile. "Hi Auntie."
"Yn-ah," said your mom as she took you by the arm, dragging you over toward Joshua, "I was just talking to Josh about how good you are at badminton."
Your eyes widened slightly, and you noted the way Joshua's did the same. You made eye contact with Kevin as this happened. He seemed caught at a crossroads, unable to help or say anything. "I guess I'm okay at it."
"Liar," Kevin suddenly jumped in.
You sent him a look. Wait really?
He shrugged sheepishly. "I don't wanna downplay your abilities, dude. You're really good."
Oh. "Thanks, Kev," you said, blinking. Your heart warmed at the finger guns he sent your way. It was nice to know he had your back.
"Good! See? You and Josh should play doubles together." Your mother somehow got a racquet into your hand. She clapped her hands and ushered her two other children off their butts. "Come on, you two, you can be on Kevin's team."
"But that's not what doubles means, Mama—"
Joshua sidled up beside you with an apology in his smile. "Sorry, you don't have to do this if you don't want to. I don't want you to be forced to teach me or anything."
Guilt wormed itself into your stomach. "No, no! It's totally okay," you amended swiftly. "This all just happened really quickly, but I'd be so down to teach you badminton, if you'd like."
He bobbed his head up and down, patting the netting of his racquet. "Okay, yeah. That'd be really cool actually."
You nodded, returning his expression. "Cool."
You and Joshua had somehow taken over the makeshift badminton court. The twins had gotten tired of the "big kids" playing too hard, and Kevin… actually, you didn't know why Kevin put down his racquet. But at some point, you noticed that he was just hanging out in a chair, sipping some kind of fruit juice as he observed you and Joshua. (That was what you assumed he was doing. There was a book propped open in his lap, but you hadn't seen him turn a page in a while. And he had put his sunglasses on, so you couldn't exactly see what his eyes were doing.)
You tracked the birdie as it flew over the net to your side. "Nice!" You praised, taking a few steps in the diagonal to hit the birdie back over with an easy backhand flick.
Joshua stumbled forward, but hit it back over. "Shoot," he said, barely catching himself before he crashed into the netting.
You chuckled, "Careful." You backed up and gave the birdie a gentle bump.
It sailed over the net, but it landed too close to it for Joshua to get a clean shot back over. He sighed as he bent down to pick the projectile up from the grass. "Dang. Nice hit, Yn."
Content with your shot as well, you walked over to the net to meet him. "Thanks, man."
"Hyungseo-ah!"
You watched as Kevin stood up from his chair at his mom's call. "Yeah, what's up?"
As she strolled over to him, she was reapplying sunscreen onto her arms and face. "We have more new neighbors. Since you're not doing anything, you should come and welcome them with me. There’s someone I think you should meet."
You and Kevin locked gazes for a second before he turned back to his mom. You didn't know why you kept looking at each other—this all felt like déjà vu, but maybe it was the fact that it seemed like your moms were separating you both instead of bringing you together that was throwing you off.
"Uhm, sure, Mom." He dropped his book into his seat and followed after his mom.
Your gaze trailed after him for a moment before you snapped back to reality. You swiped the sweat off your forehead with the back of your hand. "Sorry, where were we?"
Just then, Seokjin made his way down the lakeshore with baby Leena strapped to his chest again. He threw up an arm in greeting. "Hey, kids. You guys still at it?"
"Yup," you said back. "He's getting good at it!"
Joshua laughed lightly. "Ah, you flatter me. It's just 'cause Yn's a good teacher."
Seokjin's eyes flickered between the two of you. "Huh. I'm sure she is."
"Anyways," you coughed. "Did you just come from the new neighbor's house or something?" He hadn't arrived from the direction of his own house, which was on the other side of yours.
Your uncle by association gave his affirmative, one hand pressed gently on the back of his baby in his holster. "Of course! You know I'm too nosy to not have gone to introduce myself and see what's up. The couple has a girl around your age, Yn-ie. Their son is off in Paris for his job or something though."
The two men could probably see the gears in your brain turning. Another person who was around yours and Kevin's age? You really didn't want to read too much into it, but—you pushed the thought to the side. It probably wasn't what you were thinking, right?
"Uh, you good, Yn?" Joshua asked.
Your eyes shuttered. "Yeah. I was just thinking about something." You gestured with your racquet in a flourish. "How about another round?"
EPISODE FOUR: THE DAMSEL IN DISTRESS DEAL™
THE crickets were particularly melodious tonight. Their chirrups became lovely background music as you perched on the stairs of your back porch beneath the warm glow of the outside light. Moths swarmed the bulb, casting little shadow puppets along the wooden deck.
You were hunched over one of the few books you brought along with you for the trip. Your siblings liked to tease you for bringing “school work” on a summer trip, but these had been purchased out of your own interest. It was an anthology of experiences related to animal behavior. The certain piece that had originally caught your eye had been about the Alaskan husky’s primal nature to run, and their participation in dog sled racing. You’d come across it originally in a magazine on an airplane, finding yourself enthralled in a story of the stamina, determination, and hard work that these dogs faced in the brutal Alaskan winters.
When your plane landed, you had gone online and found more stories like them. Thus, the book in your lap and money down the drain. (Though, you would argue that it was money well-spent.)
“Warm night out.”
You startled, heart galloping in your chest, as Kevin appeared in your periphery and stepped into the light.
To his credit, he took on a sheepish sort of grin. “Oops, sorry. Probably should have given a warning or something.”
You pressed a hand to your palpitating heart and scooted over to give him room to sit on the step next to you. “No, it’s all good. I don’t think there was really any way that you could have warned me.” You were probably way too deep into your book to have even noticed if he was any quieter.
He took a seat beside you, posture mimicking yours with his forearms pressed onto his knees. “You’re right,” he murmured. “Whatcha reading?” He asked while inclining his chin toward the pages in your lap.
“Oh.” You kept a couple fingers wedged between the pages you were on as you flipped to the cover to show him. “It’s just this, uhm, collection of stories on animal behavior. Real fascinating stuff, actually, and a lot of it is kind of inspirational.” You tucked a strand of hair behind your ear, unsure of why you were always shy about telling people about something you were passionate about. You shouldn’t have thought so little of Kevin Moon, though. He never gave you any worries about being judged.
“Oh, that sounds neat,” he said, scooting closer. “Is it for your major? You’re still doing wildlife biology, right—or is it ecology?”
“Wildlife biology,” you confirmed. “It’s not for my major or anything, no. Just something I was interested in.”
A thought suddenly occurred to you and you were rewinding all of the things that had happened in the past couple of days. Before Kevin could comment further on the topic of majors, you piped up, “Actually, I wanted to talk to you about something.”
His eyes widened a smidge, his posture straightening. “Oh? What about?”
You felt around the porch deck for the receipt you had been using as a makeshift bookmark, hand flopping around before you snatched it up and slipped it into the pages of your book. You set the book aside. “Is it just me, or are our moms… you know…”
“Doing the Thing again?” He finished. He sighed with a little grimace, “Yeah, I think I’m seeing it.”
The “Thing” that both you and Kevin were referring to was none other than the very act of matronly matchmaking taking place between you and the new kids on the block. At least you could confirm that you weren’t overthinking it.
You recalled the events of earlier today when Kevin and his mom had come back to where everyone else was with the new family that had just arrived. The Xus were another party of just three—their oldest son was in Paris, as Seokjin reported, but their youngest, Serena, was yours and Kevin's age. It didn't take a rocket scientist to figure out who Kevin's mom wanted to introduce her son to.
“You know what’s crazy?” You said to him then, “On the car ride up here, I asked my mom—like, point-blank, you know?—to not try to matchmake us anymore.”
Kevin perked up. “Dude. That’s crazy, because that’s what I asked my mom on the car ride up here.”
You sputtered, “You’re kidding.”
“Great minds think alike,” he said, lip curling upward into a smile and his arms coming up in a halfhearted shrug. “But I should have known it wouldn't be that easy.”
Now that you were thinking back to your own conversation, you should have known something fishy was going on when your mom mentioned Kevin specifically… You only thought that she was being thorough in her understanding of what you were asking her to do, but turned out, it was only a loophole. “You’re so right,” you groaned and tilted your head backward. “Literally what are we gonna do?”
The two of you stewed in silence on this fine night.
There was one night, similar to this one, where you had sought each other out. You couldn’t remember what year it was—something close to sixth grade when both of you had the mind to realize the game your moms were trying to play. From that night came a pact of sorts, one that would hopefully try to steer each other away from a fate that neither of you were sure that you wanted yet. After all, eleven years old was a little premature to be talking about who you wanted to spend the rest of your life with, right?
Kevin leaned back onto his palms. “We need to make a new pact, I think.”
Your head swiveled over to him. “Amendments to the pact?”
“Either amend it or come up with a new one to fit our current situation,” he said. “A rescue protocol.”
A rescue protocol… you could see it begin to take shape in your head. The previous pact was different—an agreement between you and Kevin that you were both simply friends, no matter how many times your moms made you do chores together, or tie each other’s shoelaces, or swap numbers and emails and social media. And it had worked, for the most part; you were both still friends after all these years.
But this time would have to be different. Your moms weren’t driving you toward each other anymore.
“The Rescue Protocol—is that what we’re calling it?” You mused in an attempt to bring mirth to the conversation.
Kevin made a sound like a laugh. “Better than ‘the pact,’ I like to think.”
“How about the ‘Damsel in Distress Deal?’”
He let out an actual laugh this time. You got to watch his eyes turn up into crescent moons, the corners crinkling with pretty smile lines. His smile was always contagious, even after all this time. “The ‘Damsel in Distress Deal?’” He parroted. When he allowed the phrase to soak into his brain for a second, tongue massaging his bottom lip, he relented. “Okay, that’s actually not bad.”
You giggled. “So we either call it the Rescue Protocol or the Damsel in Distress Deal, trademark.”
“Trademark?” His reaction sent you into a flurry of snickers, hand clamped over your mouth so the sounds wouldn’t wake up your family. “What? Are we gonna advertise this idea to people?” He chuckled.
“It’s a good idea!”
“We don’t even know what the parameters are yet,” he sputtered. Kevin lightly punched your upper arm. “Silly goose.”
“Geese are not silly,” you found yourself replying. They could be mean creatures. “But I think they’re cute.”
“Jacob thinks they’re scary.”
You gave a playful roll of your eyes. “This Jacob guy again?” After a moment, you sighed, toeing the dirt on the bottom step with the tip of your shoe. “Hey, can I ask you a question?”
Kevin sobered a little, but the remnants of his merriment remained in the shine of his irises. “Shoot.”
“Are you…” You struggled to string the words together. There was a question you’d come up with already, but you didn’t know if it was too forward or not. “Are you ready for a relationship?”
The question caught him off guard. His gaze flickered from you, to the grass, to his lap, to the moon-soaked surface of the lake further down the hill. “I… I’m not sure, really,” he muttered, then added, “I think I would know the right person when I meet them.”
“Yeah,” you agreed.
“Or maybe not,” he shrugged. “Maybe I’ve already met the person I want to spend the rest of my life with, but the relationship just hasn’t gotten there yet.”
You pondered on that for a moment, then realized you agreed with that, too. If you already met the person you were meant to be with, the thought of a relationship was a little less daunting. You already knew this person. “So we’re in agreement then? This new pact is something we both want?”
“As usual, we are in agreement,” he nodded. “What’s our plan then? Fight fire with fire?”
You snorted. “Pretty much, right? We just have to, you know, swoop in whenever we can to counteract their movements. Help each other out, y’know?” You laughed at how ridiculous this all sounded. “I guess it’s really just doing what they’ve wanted us to do this whole time.”
Kevin grinned to himself. “Spend time together?”
“Yeah.”
“I’m down for that. You?”
“Yeah, man.” You shifted to angle your body toward him and stuck your hand out. “You still remember it, right?”
Kevin sent you an incredulous look, as if offended that you could think so lowly of him. He reflected your angled body, hand primed and ready. “Uh, yeah. Do you remember it?”
You clicked your tongue. “Of course, I do! It's the seal."
You knocked the back of your hand against his to signal the beginning of the handshake.
Like second nature, the two of you made your way through the unnecessarily (but also completely necessary) convoluted masterpiece that was your sixth grade handshake. It was what you used the first time you sealed the deal on the pact, and whenever you made any other agreements of significance (e.g. the Juice Pouch Accord of Eighth Grade). Now, it would seal the Rescue Protocol/Damsel in Distress Deal, too.
When the handshake combination finished (marked by twin flicks to the forehead—"Ow! You always flick so hard.”; “Yikes, hope that doesn’t leave a mark…”—and a… proper handshake), the only thing left to do was put it into motion.
Teasing, you sent him a look of approval. “You did remember.”
“Funny how you say that as if you have the better memory out of the two of us,” he quipped back with an unimpressed look.
You hummed your own amusement back to him, taking the book that you’d set aside earlier back into your lap but leaving it unopened. There wasn’t any signal in this area, so devices were practically useless, so books and board games and sports became the go-to for entertainment. It was what your parents originally liked so much about the place, and eventually you and your siblings. It allowed for moments between the moments like this… whatever this was.
Kevin leaned back onto his palms again, and the shadows and moonlight cut across his jawline like glass. “I didn’t think you’d be up so late.”
“Yeah,” you drawled and picked at a strand of grass sticking out between the boards of a stair step. “I couldn’t sleep for some reason and decided to read, but then I opened my window and realized it was a nice night out, so here I am.” You nodded to him, “You?”
He gave a soft sort of chuckle. “You know I never sleep.”
Your chest felt heavy all of a sudden. “Still have the sleeping issue?” You asked softly. It had been a big thing when he was a kid. It had started off as being a very light sleeper, but over time, you discovered that sometimes Kevin just did not get sleep.
“Yeah…” he said, "I'm usually able to sleep when I'm here though, y'know? The peace, the quiet, the familiarity—it all helps. It was just tonight that was out of the ordinary." When he glanced over at you, the side of his lip quirked upward. "Don't worry too much."
You'd always thought about the lake as your home away from home, your safe space. A part of you had always thought it was the same way for him.
“How could I not worry?" You asked, poorly masking your concern as you leaned over your knees and looked at him. “How did you ever get used to your place at uni?” There must have been some reason that he was able to survive over there.
The corners of his mouth curled upward into a smile. “I was lucky,” he admitted. “I met people who have become some of my best friends and family. I guess it’s just weird being so far away from them and it's catching up to me.”
As much teasing as you did about this Jacob character, you were glad Kevin had found him and his other friends. Being away from home like that could not have been easy. At least you could rest assured that he was taken care of over there.
He had grown so comfortable over there that even his subconscious missed them.
You shifted a little closer to him and gently leaned your head onto his shoulder. He seemed surprised at first, but relaxed and let you keep your head there. “That’s good,” you whispered. “I’m happy for you.”
A beat passed, and the crazy thought occurred to you that maybe you should have asked to do this first. “Is this okay?”
His hand warmed the top of your head. “More than okay.”
The two of you sat there like that for however long—you couldn’t really tell. Time passed by differently here, it seemed. Friends definitely comforted each other like this though, right? Right.
EPISODE FIVE: [SHENANIGANS ENSUE.]
"KEVIN, would you mind giving this snack pack to Serena?"
"Oh, I got it, Auntie!" You snatched the Ziploc bag of trail mix from off the counter where Kevin's mom had set it out. "I haven't properly introduced myself to her yet," you said as some kind of explanation.
Out of the corner of your eye, you saw Kevin look away to conceal his laugh at your inconspicuousness.
Today, the five families planned to go on a long nature hike as a large group. There was a specific path that your family, the Moons, and the Kims always took at least once every year that led out to a waterfall. It was a beautiful slice of nature, but then again, you thought this entire area was beautiful.
You swung out of the Moons' kitchen and out onto the back lawn where everyone was slowly gathering to take off. Eyes scanning the immediate area, you located Serena Xu standing off to the side plaiting her hair into a simple braid over her shoulder.
As you made your way over to her, your Uncle Jin suddenly appeared beside you. “You look like a woman on a mission, Yn-ie. What’s the sitch?”
Your brain took a second to register the reference. “Has Sana been watching Kim Possible or have you, Uncle?”
“And if I said it was both of us?” He sniffed. Sana was his eldest daughter, only three years old, but Jin and Yuna were very updated in the essential kids shows they wanted their daughters to watch.
“As you should,” you said with an indulgent nod. You turned your gaze over to your intended target.
Serena’s eyes wandered up from her hair and met your eyes, then glanced over at Jin. You hoped she didn’t think the two of you were ganging up on her or anything. Two new people at once could be intimidating.
“Hi, Serena, right?” You asked as you and Jin approached her.
She gave a small nod, pulling her braid’s end over her shoulder as she fidgeted with it. “Uh, yeah. And you’re Yn?”
“We already met yesterday,” Jin said chipperly.
Serena nodded again.
Your fingers danced along the edge of the Ziploc baggie in your hands, squeezing along the edge to make sure that it was closed properly. Your teeth ran over your bottom lip before you were passing her the bag in your hands. “Kevin’s mom made all of us snack bags, and I just wanted to say a proper hello.”
She accepted the bag, eyes wide as she inspected its contents through the clear plastic. “Oh, wow. Thank you; that’s really thoughtful.”
“Oh!” Seokjin illuminated like a lightbulb, clapping his hands loud enough to make both you and Serena wince. (You and she met each other’s eyes with awkward laughs.) “Didn’t you mention yesterday that you were pre-law?”
Your eyebrows flew upward. “Pre-law?” Your head bobbed up and down with a low whistle. “That’s cool.”
“Yeah, uh, I guess so,” she said. “It’s a little intimidating right now, if I’m being honest.”
“Yn!” Ripped out of the conversation, you excused yourself and found the source of your name. Your mom was perched on one of the picnic benches outside of the Moons’ place, slathering sunscreen on your brother’s face. Connor’s face was wrinkled in extreme displeasure as she patted the white cream into his skin with a slapping sound.
Always amusing.
Perched upon the picnic table next to them was none other than Joshua Hong. He sent you a friendly greeting wave.
“What’s up?” You asked, leaving Uncle Jin with Serena so you could make your way over to your chagrined little brother, your mom, and Joshua. “Where’s Dad and Alice? Hey Josh.”
He replied pleasantly, “Hey Yn.”
“Your dad’s grabbing something from the car with her,” she dismissed. “Would you mind showing Joshua where we put our bandages? We have so many of the little ones—”
“It’s just a little cut; I swear I’m fine!” Joshua chuckled good-naturedly. He showed you the slice in the side of his finger that was only a couple of centimeters long, but you could tell that he’d just recently cleaned it up and was holding it with a small piece of napkin.
Your mom made a noise of disagreement. “It’s going to get infected on the hike.”
You shuffled on your feet, offering him a small smile. “Sorry, man. I have to agree with her.”
“Thank you. You remember where the bandages are, right? You and Josh just go run up really quick together.”
You didn’t even realize when Kevin got here. “Oh, why don’t I just get one from my place for you?” Kevin waltzed into the conversation with an innocent expression, hands tucked into the pockets of his shorts, as he appeared at your side. “Since we’re just right here.”
Joshua gestured toward him with his hand-clutching-hand situation and hopped off from the picnic table top. “If you don’t mind.”
“Yeah, dude, it’s no problem.” Kevin’s hand met the place between your shoulders with a warm pat, and he led Joshua up to his family’s cabin for the bandages.
Your amusement followed after them as you watched them leave. Your mom sent you a curious look, eyes narrowed in question, and you could only shrug helplessly.
The hike commenced shortly after the boys got back from raiding the Moon’s medicine cabinet. Your dad and Alice returned sometime before they did, and Alice had once again requested you put her hair up in, as she said, “Something nice.” As if the wilderness would care about her nice hair-do, but you gave her a plait that matched Serena’s.
Your brother and sister kept near to you as you led the group through the beginning of the trail. Though you didn’t consider yourself as someone who exercised religiously, you never turned down a good foraging session. Your freshman environmental science course had presented you with plenty of opportunity to dive into the dense forest areas near the building. Even in the early reaches of the morning (8:30 morning labs were sometimes difficult to be disciplined about, but you were determined), when the fog clung to the forest floor and dew slipped down velvety oak leaves, you found yourself at peace.
At some point in time, Connor picked up a large fallen stick and used it as a hiking staff. “You shall not pass!” He declared after running a little ways ahead of you and mimicked the deepness of Gandolf’s voice.
You snorted as you passed by him and ruffled his hair. “Name the series that’s from and then we can talk, dude.”
“You’re never any fun!” Connor garbled, jogging after you.
You scoffed, pressing a hand against your chest in feigned offense. “I’m way more fun than you are,” you retorted.
“Okay, prove it! Make this more fun.”
“So you’re saying this hike isn’t fun?” You gasped.
Connor stabbed at the dirt path warn into the ground that weaved through the trees ahead for miles. It was by no means a challenging hike, just a lengthy one that required a bit of enthusiasm and endurance. “Well last time, you brought that thing—”
“Sugar water,” you supplied.
“—yeah, that one—and we caught butterflies!” Painted Lady butterflies were a common species of butterfly that was widespread among North America. Luckily, it hadn't been too difficult to find them.
“Woah, you guys caught butterflies last year? Without me?” Man, this guy was just everywhere today, you thought jokingly, as Kevin appeared on your other side with a boyish grin on his face. “That’s cool.”
“We didn’t catch them,” you corrected. It was more so a lure with the sugar water (a substitute for nectar), letting the kids see the insect up close, and then setting it free. You were no lepidopterologist—butterflies were cool, but no special interest of yours. “They just landed in my hand for a little. You should’ve been there to take pictures.”
Kevin hit the palm of hand against his forehead. “That’s what I forgot! I forgot to bring my camera on the hike.”
“Tsk tsk, what would your sister say now?” You chided playfully.
He pressed his lips together in a grimace. “Don’t bring her up—I can hear the echo of her voice as we speak.” To prove his point, he pressed his fingers to his temples, eyes fluttering closed, as if he really could hear his sister’s teasing from wherever she was.
You humored him with a laugh—
“Yn! I’m gonna climb that boulder!”
Okay, fun time was over. You tracked the sound of your brother’s voice, and with barely enough time to catch up to him, you set off the beaten path to follow. “Hey, you better be careful or Mom’s gonna put you on bedrest for the rest of the trip,” you chuckled as Kevin fell in step beside you. You said to him offhandedly, “Would you possibly mind…”
“Yeah, I got it.” He did a small jog over to the cluster of boulders your brother had begun to scale. Going bouldering wasn’t a new activity for you and your siblings, but you remembered that these ones were a little larger than your mom was usually comfortable with. You were grateful Kevin understood immediately.
He was already standing below where Connor was, playing along with whatever roleplay your brother had made up, all the while hovering in case he fell.
The rest of the party caught up to you at this point, and Alice, Uncle Jin, Sana, and even Josh converged upon the rock formation in a flurry of giggles and mirthful playtime. You observed the action with ill-concealed fondness for everyone there as they came together and helped one another climb to the topmost boulder as if it were the peak of Mount Everest. Something warmed within you at the sight.
On your left, Yuna, who was on Leena duty this morning, came to stand beside you. Some of the parents were pulling out cell phones to record all the chaos going on. “Why don’t you go up with them?” She asked, inclining her head to the rock formation.
Josh was just beckoning Kevin up with him, and you saw Kevin’s head turned back over his shoulder. When his eyes found yours, Kevin waved you over, too.
“I should,” you murmured in agreement.
Yuna hummed as she adjusted the little bonnet on Leena’s head. “You know, Kevin…” she began. You waited for her to finish, but she smiled instead, shaking her head. “Nevermind. Go have fun, you bean.”
You giggled at the nickname, then wasted little time going to join everyone else. You could probably ask her what she was going to say later.
The evening found the group of you gathered on the shady back lawn between yours and the Moons’ cabin for dinner once again. The Xus and Hongs had all retired to their own respective houses for downtime, so it would just be the three original families. You perched a little ways away on the back stairs of your house’s porch, a bowl of peelable tangerines in your lap. At your feet, you had rolled the edges of a brown paper bag you’d found beneath the sink to use as a disposal. All of the compostable waste you and everyone else produced while here would become great fertilizer and mulch. It was something you usually had your siblings help with, especially before you left the lake.
Kevin had his cap turned backwards as he made his way over to you in flip flops. “That seat taken?” He asked with a nod toward the board next to you.
Your eyebrows rose. “All yours.”
“Thanks,” he beamed, doing a silly waddle, then sitting down next to you. He reached into the bowl on your lap for an orange, and you moved the compost bag between your bodies. “Your mom was talking about Josh again,” he said as he dug his thumb into the skin of the tangerine. Its juices sprayed into the air and released its sweet fragrance.
“Why am I not surprised?” You sighed with a shake of his head. “You know, he’s really good with my siblings though.”
“Oh, is he?”
You shrugged, shoveling a tangerine half into your mouth. “Mm—yeah,” you said once you’d swallowed. “But you’re also good with my siblings. I dunno, it was just an observation.” Based on what you saw on the hike, you could confidently conclude that your siblings agreed with both Kevin and Josh. They were both friendly beyond means, easy on the eyes, kind on the soul.
Kevin didn’t say anything for a beat, and still didn’t say anything until he’d finished the orange in his hands and picked up a new one. “I hear he’s going into medicine. I have a friend who’s going into medicine.”
“Which one?” You asked, then joked, “Don’t tell me it’s Jacob now…”
When Kevin gave you a sheepish expression, you shook your head, “Okay, now I think you’re obsessed with this guy.” All the teasing was in good fun, of course.
“He’s just my soulmate,” he lamented with a hand draped over his forehead for added effect. “No biggie.”
“Damn,” you laughed. You popped a wedge of tangerine into your mouth, eyes going to the sky for a moment as you pondered on something. “So you say that when Jacob met his current girlfriend, it was because of you.”
“Yup.”
“So you set them up? You matchmade them?”
He nodded. “I’m very proud of myself, actually. I take credit for all of their milestones and anniversaries. I better be the Best Man at their wedding, and—”
“But you matchmade them; doesn’t that make you a hypocrite?”
Kevin’s speech came to an abrupt halt. You watched, in blatant amusement, as his face contorted and arranged itself in the five stages of grief. “Oh my god… I am a hypocrite.”
For a moment, you felt bad for laughing at his blanched expression. “It doesn’t make you a bad person,” you assured him.
“It makes me a hypocrite.” He hung his head, but shot back up just as quickly. “Okay, but wait! It’s different.”
“Do tell.”
“It’s different because Jacob never told me he didn’t want to be matchmade.” The calculations taking place in his head were as stark to you, the observer, as if he was working it out on a white board. His eyebrows knitted together. “Yeah. That’s the difference. Plus, that match was fully successful, and he ended up putting in a lot of the work himself by the end anyway.”
You bobbed your head in agreement. “Fair enough.”
Kevin settled his chin on his hand, eyes slicing back over to you. “Aren’t you a hypocrite, too, then?”
You blinked. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
His face said it all. “Jenna from fifth grade.”
Oh. It all came rushing back to you…
But before anything else could be commented on the matter (read: before you could go through your own miniature existential crisis like Kevin had), a presence appeared, squatting down between the two of you. “What—” Jin covered Leena’s ears as he sat down, “—is the mother-effing tea?”
You and Kevin immediately scooted over to make room for the uncle coming in hot. You moved the compost bag back to the other side of your leg.
Kevin chuckled. “You said ‘mother-effing.’”
“Aish,” he exhaled, wrinkling his nose up. “Yuna’s on relax mode right now and has two beers in her. I get a pass, okay? Now catch me up on all of the exciting stuff.”
You and Kevin traded glances. “What exciting stuff?”
Jin’s expression flattened into a deadpan. “Don’t be like that. You two have been so secretive lately; I wanna be let in on the secret stuff.”
“I don’t know if it’s necessarily a secret…” You drawled.
Kevin scratched the back of his head. “Uh, yeah. Well, we’ve kind of figured out that our moms are trying to set us up with Josh and Serena instead of each other now.”
You didn't know what you were expecting Uncle Jin to reply, but he gave a nod. "Ah, I can see that." He sucked in a breath through his teeth, "Why did they suddenly go 360 on the two of you? It seems kind of out of left field."
"Well, we kind of asked them to stop trying to get us two together."
Jin hummed. "Yah, that makes sense. It all makes sense now." He made an old-man noise out of his throat as he shifted his position and the way that Leena rested on his chest. You and Kevin buckled down and hung off his words. "They probably only mean well, you know that, right? Right. But I can see that you both are still uneasy about that, and I get that, too. So—I'll tell you what.
"I'll help you guys out," he said. "I think they already know I'm nosy enough to butt in everywhere, so it shouldn't be a problem for me to… tch tch, y'know—" He gestured very indulgently with his hands, "—do my thing—am I making any sense? It's been a long day."
Another look passed between you and Kevin, then you both shared a laugh, relief making your postures relax and your grins widen. "No, we understand completely."
It seemed like you just gained an ally.
EPISODE SIX: CAN I BE A ROCK IN MY NEXT LIFE? THANKS.
THERE was a collection of jet skis that someone around the lake owned, and Kevin's parents would rent them out once every summer for everyone to use. Of course, it was mainly for the older kids and adults; thus, your siblings and the little Kims were banned from partaking in the festivities, much to your siblings' chagrin. It was for safety reasons that they were forced to find some other method of entertainment for the day.
You trudged your way down the path from the Kims' house to yours. In your hand, you wielded the light blue stick of baby sunscreen Seokjin asked you to fetch for his girls, but based on the fact that Leena, Sana, nor Yuna were even out here, it was safe to assume it was really for him.
Those who were participating in riding jet skis, and some who just wanted to watch and soak up the summer sun, were gathered somewhere between your house and the Moon house again. The two properties shared a single dock made of wood faded out from the sun and washed by the lake water. You could recall summer after summer running down the pier and cannonballing into the water.
"Hey! I got your sunscreen!" You hollered as you neared the group down by the water, raising the sunscreen stick up in the air.
The five or so heads turned toward you at the sound of your voice. You didn't miss Kevin's presence specifically, his arms sticking out from the life vest strapped to his chest. You did not deign to look further.
Jin raised his hand. "My Savior! Thanks, Yn-ie!"
You tossed the sunscreen down to him and he caught it between both of his hands before beginning to slather the cream all over his face.
You noted the last life vest sitting on the edge of the dock closest to land and made a beeline for it.
Just as you descended the hill, your mom appeared in your view with an empty plate in her hands, the bottom ringed in a translucent red liquid. "Yn, honey. Can you do me a huge favor and chop up the last watermelon? I didn't realize we would need more. Your dad and Kevin's dad are driving into town right now for some extra provisions and an extra large watermelon."
"Oh, sure." Your eyes skittered to the vest on the dock, but you realized slicing the watermelon wouldn't take too long.
You took the plate from your mom without further comment and began making your way up the hill to your house.
As you slid the door open, the sound of chatter carried from the living room floor. Eyes peered up from where they were seated, surrounding the coffee table on the floor. A colorful array of beads and string was strewn over the surface, and you came to a distinct conclusion as to where all the non-jet-skiers had gone.
"Hello everyone," you mused, closing the screen door behind you.
Josh was the first to say hello back. "Wanna join us? We're making friendship bracelets." He lifted the craft in his hands as if the beads and materials displayed weren't proof enough.
You leaned over the back of the couch. "Looks like fun! Maybe I will."
Outside by the lake, Kevin monitored the back door of your cabin for when you would make your way back out. He had been wanting to race you on a jet ski ever since the owners brought them over for everyone to use.
There were a grand total of five people surrounding the opening to the dock: Kevin and his mom, your mom, Jin, and Serena. Everyone except for the moms were strapped in lifejackets in preparation to board one of the two jet skis sitting in port.
"Huh," Jin said as he craned his head up in the direction Kevin's was in. "Wonder what's taking her so long."
"I'm sure she's just taking her time or something." Kevin pushed off of the post he was leaning against. "I'll go check up on her—"
“Oh, no-no-no! It’s okay,” your mom protested, her body already turn-tailed to head up to the house. Even Kevin’s mom made a gesture for him to stay put. “We’ll go check up on Yn.”
Kevin’s mom then gestured with her arm toward Serena, who had wandered off further down the dock to inspect one of the vehicles waiting in the water. “Why don’t you go help her with the jet ski?”
“And me!” Seokjin boisterously slung an arm around his cousin-in-law’s shoulders and swung him toward the entrance of the pier.
Kevin’s eyes went wide when he almost tumbled face-first into the hardwood. “Shit,” he sputtered. “Uh, Uncle Jin?”
“Yep?”
“That sounded fishy to you, too, right?”
Jin let out a laugh and patted Kevin’s shoulder in consolation. “Yep.”
“I feel like I haven’t seen you all afternoon.” The words left your mouth as you blocked the unforgiving golden hour sun with a hand to your forehead. The light at this time of day gleamed across the surface of the lake and gave the illusion of a molten pot of gold. You imagined swimming in it, dipping your toes into its warm innards from the end of the dock.
Kevin stood at the edge of the lake’s shoreline with his hair dried from a day of jet skiing, a fresh T-shirt over his chest and the lifejacket from earlier nowhere to be seen. That, along with the jet skis. Those had been returned a little over an hour ago. “We were off doing our separate things, I guess,” he said, his arms folded across his chest. “Speaking of, where’ve you been? You went to cut watermelon and never came back.” He added a small laugh to his words, hoping you wouldn’t think he was bothered by the fact that the two of you didn’t get to hang out on jet skis together.
“Oh, heh.” The sheepishness in your voice made him glance over at you. You didn’t know why you were suddenly getting so shy about it, but from the pocket of your shorts, you withdrew a small piece of beaded string, tied at the end in one of those fancy loops that were adjustable. You didn’t know how it was done; Joshua had done something with the end like magic. “Yuna, Josh, and the kids were all inside making friendship bracelets and they kind of roped me into it.”
“Ah.”
“This one’s for you,” you said, holding it out to him. It was a quirky piece with white block letter beads strung together next to acrylic star and pony beads. You’d scavenged a crescent moon somewhere amongst all the pandemonium, and it sat next to the letter N on the chain.
Kevin peered at you and his irises gleamed with the brilliance of golden hour. He frowned in joy, delicately accepting the chain from you with his bottom lip jutted out in a combination frown-pout. “You’re incredible,” he gushed as he inspected the little gift. “Dude, I’m honestly so touched. This is so cute.”
You broke out into a grin, your heart bursting with pride in your chest. “Glad it’s not cringy.”
“I’m offended for you,” he scoffed, aghast. “How could you think this is cringy?” It was probably a genuine question, but you kept silent as you watched him loop the end of the bracelet around his wrist and struggled to figure out how to tie off the end with one hand.
You stepped forward, and he stuck his hand out to you. “Shua showed me how this works,” you murmured, wracking your brain for the quick how-to Joshua showed with his own wrist. (You had been too confused to ask him to see it done again, and only nodded and smiled.)
“Shua?”
“Mm, yeah, apparently he makes a lot of friendship bracelets, especially for friends at school.” Your tongue stuck out of the corner of your mouth as you tried something and… “Ta-da!”
With the bracelet secured onto his wrist, Kevin beamed like a kid on Christmas, and held it up to show it to the setting sun. “It’s great—it’s perfect. Thank you, Yn.”
It was some sort of cosmic magic that corralled everyone back down to the shoreline again, but this time, with all of the kids and non-jet-skiers, as well. Another tradition that your party liked to share every year at the lake was rock-skipping. Perhaps it was more of just an activity than a tradition, but it was something that none of you failed to remember to do whenever you were up here. Since you were a kid, you had been practicing to hone your technique.
Your siblings and the Kims, especially, all ran up to the shoreline beside you and Kevin, and the search for the perfect throwing rock began. In the chaos of merriment and childlike glee, the lot of you trudged into the cooling water of the lake’s shallow shore.
“I know you just gave me the coolest friendship bracelet ever,” said Kevin from beside you as he sifted through the rocks beneath his flip flops, “but I hope you know that I’m gonna crush you this year.”
You snorted. “Okay, Kevin.”
“No, I’m serious!” You guffawed at the sight of his expression; he’d even stood up straight in the water, a pair of flat stones in either hand. “My friend YH!Yn—she’s an engineer, right—”
“Oh, so you’re gonna win by cheating?”
“Nuh-uh,” he rolled his eyes, unimpressed by your posturing. “She showed me this video online. You know Mark Rober? She’s a huge fan, but that’s besides the point. The point is that the video taught me the perfect technique to rock-skip.”
Something in you liked to think that was still cheating, but then again, neither of you had ever really established any ground rules to this, and certainly none about doing research. Your eyes narrowed. “Explain yourself.”
Kevin decided between one of the two rocks in his hands with a brief peek at both of them, before discarding the one in his left hand back into the water with an anticlimactic sploosh. “You’re supposed to launch the rock so it hits the surface of the water at a twenty-degree angle.”
Joshua trudged into the water near both you and Kevin with the sleeves of his plaid over-shirt rolled past his elbows. “I don’t even know what kind of rock to look for, and you guys are bringing trig into this?”
“Oh my god, don’t even get them started,” Jin grumbled from a handful of meters away from the three of you. He kicked through the shallow water with his eyes pinned to the ground in his own search for a rock to skip. “Yn almost gave me a black eye one year.”
“That was an accident and I was ten!”
“Yeah, well rocks hurt!”
Joshua bent down slightly and scooped up a rock from the water. He considered it for a minute, taking in its size, its weight, and how pretty it was. “I guess this can work. So do you guys have, like, a training boot camp for beginners or something?” He chuckled.
“I can show you,” you offered once you’d decided on your own rock for the first round.
“Tch,” Kevin huffed, “if you wanna show him the wrong way to do it.”
Your jaw unhinged. “If you keep this up, I will take back that friendship bracelet, Moon Hyungseo.”
Jin covered his mouth with one of his hands and sidled up next to Joshua. “Ooh, she used the government name.” That coaxed another laugh out of the Los Angeles boy.
Kevin held his decorated wrist to his chest. “You can pry it from my cold, dead hands.”
Suffice to say that when it came down to it, Kevin did have the better technique. There were really four main things to consider when rock-skipping, one of them being that the rock ideally should hit the water at twenty-degrees, as Kevin had mentioned before. Though, you did have to give yourself some credit for managing to work your way up to thirteen skips in a row without the help of an engineer friend.
EPISODE SEVEN: ALWAYS TREAT YOUR PLANTS WITH CARE
VACATION granted you the express permission to be the laziest bum in the world. After three years of college work, sometimes it was nice to have even a single day to yourself to do what you always wanted to: relax. In a world that moved as fast as this one, it was nearly impossible to take breaks without feeling the aching guilt of a day without productivity.
But there was something about the lake… you didn't know. Maybe it was just because years of coming here and associating it with the ease and carefree air of childhood that made it easier to sleep in and feel the sun on your toes.
The house and the neighboring ones were quiet this late morning. At ten or so, the Kims had swept up your siblings and their children and towed them off to town for ice cream and provisions. (You hoped they remembered to grab you some bird seed. You still had yet to replenish the bird feeders around the lake.) You weren't sure where your parents were off to, but you recalled them briefly mentioning a visit to the hidden swing at Lookout's Peak about a three mile hike from here. That meant that you had the whole house to yourself.
And what else did that mean? That you would not be in the house.
When it hit noon, you ate a quick lunch at the kitchen counter before gathering up your supplies to head outside. There was always a spare picnic blanket stashed in the hallway closet, and you grabbed a book, your neglected sketchbook, and a pencil to come along with you.
The weather was perfect, you liked to think—temperate, and not popsicle-melting, with a hint of a breeze wafting through the boughs of the oak trees. You trudged your way over to the largest oak tree with the most amount of shade, gunning to get some full relaxing done when you realized that you were not as alone as you thought you were.
You and Kevin locked eyes from where he sat against the trunk of the tree, his iPad left at his side and his camera being fiddled with between his fingers. The friendship bracelet you gave him the other day still hung around his wrist.
"Hi," he grinned. "I thought you went into town with the twins."
"Ah, nah" you sighed pleasantly as you shifted the things in your arms, "I decided to sleep in. You?"
"Same here." He amended, "Well, as much as someone like me can sleep in." He gestured to the picnic blanket bundled over your arm. "How about I help you with that?"
With teamwork (because that made the dream work), the two of you laid out the picnic blanket on the shady grass beneath the oak tree, overlooking the view of the lake. You settled yourself atop it while Kevin moved his things beside you; shoes were discarded at the edge, so you both sat comfortably on the blanket, half-facing the other.
You reached for your sketchbook, inclining your chin toward the DSLR now sitting abandoned as he picked up his iPad. "What were you up to before I got here?"
"Oh, uh, just looking through some photos I took this morning to maybe use as a reference," he said, twirling his Apple pencil between his fingers. "I keep forgetting to take pictures on this trip."
"Maybe it's a good thing," you offered. You tucked a lock of hair behind your ear and flipped to a blank page. "Let's you live in the moment, y'know?"
"Yeah. I guess so." He tapped the end of his pencil against his cheek. You were never the type for fancy technology and equipment, mainly because you were a little stubborn, but nothing could beat a good pencil and paper. "I'm gonna draw you," he suddenly declared.
A giggle bubbled out of your chest. "What? Me?"
"Yeah, why not?"
"Well then, I'm gonna draw you."
His eyebrows shot up, an amused smile worming onto his face. "You do you, honey."
The two of you, coincidentally, came to share quite the handful of interests. One of them was sketching, and you liked to give credit to your ecology and biology classes at school that gave you the time to practice your drawing skills, even if super accurate drawings weren't always required. It just gave you an excuse to combine two things you loved.
You never did pick up how to use a DSLR though. At least, not like Kevin knew how to.
You sat there for a moment with your cheek to your fist and your eyes glued to the man across from you. Drawing people was difficult—it was always the subtle details that threw you overboard, the movement of the hands and fingers, the crevices in the wrinkle of one's eyes, the… the look. The thing that made them look like a human being.
Kevin had always been a beautiful subject matter. His bone structure was near perfect in your eyes; his smile was awful to draw just because it was so pretty, and you couldn't do it justice. You could never achieve the right curl of his lips, or infuse it with his humility. And even now, you watched the way his eyelashes fell so gently over his eyes and the dusting of pink falling across his cheekbones…
"You're staring."
You blinked, breaking out of your daze. "I'm studying my subject," you clarified pointedly and began to sketch out a rough outline of his head. A portrait would do just fine for the day.
Kevin mimicked your position from earlier where he leaned in slightly and rested his cheek against his fist. "There was this internship I turned down this summer."
His words made you glance up from your paper for a moment.
He continued on, straightening, then absentmindedly sketching out an outline for your face. "It was supposed to be in New York, at this studio, but…" He blew air out between his lips, "I don't know; I couldn't do it. It was a great opportunity and it didn't call to me, but I feel so guilty about not even trying."
You waited a beat in case he wanted to continue. You could see the conflict warring across this face, the subtle flex in his jaw at his frustration—with the portrait or himself, you weren't sure.
"Sorry, I don't know why I suddenly just thought of that," he said to you. "I was just thinking about this place and not being here last year, and I think my brain just went to that."
You looked over at him in earnest. "I feel you, I mean… some things just aren't meant to be, and you shouldn't force it. That's how you get burnt out, y'know?"
"Yeah," he murmured in agreement.
"I was looking at an internship, too," you piped up with a shape exhale. "I—I didn't get it, clearly, but uhm…" It still hurt.
Kevin frowned. "Oh, man. I'm sorry, Yn. I feel like I'm just complaining now that—"
"No, oh my gosh, no!" You hurried to interrupt him. "Don't be silly," you said gently, "you shouldn't invalidate your feelings like that. Some things just really aren't meant to be." It didn't mean it hurt any less that they weren't, but maybe this was the path you were meant to take instead. "It's something I'm coming to terms with, too, but don't compare your troubles against mine. Please."
He worried his bottom lip between his teeth, and it took him a little to finally try for a half smile. "You're gonna get the next one."
You smiled back at him. "Thanks. And you'll find one that suits you."
"I hope so."
"Do you ever worry about," you began as you played around with the slightest curve of his nose on your paper, "not being who people want you to be?"
He hummed. "What do you mean?"
"Like, successful. I'm not really sure where I'm going with this." You didn't know where this had sprouted from in the first place, but one insecurity in particular had nested in the inner cavities of your chest and made itself a home. As someone who wanted to be at wildlife encampments, not catering to fancy rich dogs in a clinic, your path wasn't conventional. You were becoming a veterinarian, but your parents always thought you would end up someplace nice with a pay that was equally nice. Something practical, something they didn't have to worry over. Your calling was… elsewhere though. Somewhere a little more difficult to reach without the prying eyes and mouths of those around you.
Kevin marinated on it. "I think… the two of us are kind of similar in that way. We're both not taking on things that people have expected of us."
Out of everyone you knew, you had a feeling he would be one of the few who could empathize. "There's—there's this thing I want to do," you said. You couldn't figure out the words to string your thoughts into coherent speech; you felt like it would never come out right. But Kevin was patient. "I've always wanted to go on safari expeditions, and observe wildlife in the wild, and do research, and work with conservatories. It feels so unattainable sometimes, when I think about the people looking at me and expecting something good. Does that make sense?"
He gave a thoughtful nod, his Apple pencil tucked behind his ear for the time being. "Yeah, that makes sense. I remember you talked about it before."
That rang a bell. "When I made you watch the David Attenborough Our Planet doc series," you mused. In association, your brain sparked images of late nights, blue-light screens, and flashlights beneath blanket forts. You had been fully convinced Kevin would say the documentary series would be boring like everyone else, but to your pleasant surprise, he had been just as enthralled as you'd been.
"You didn't make me," he smiled. "I liked it."
Your chest warmed. "I still have it downloaded on my phone if you wanna watch."
He screwed his face up in amusement, shaking his head. "You're one of the biggest dorks I know. And I know so many dorks now."
"I'm still your favorite dork though, right?" You smiled down at your paper when you were satisfied with how his eyes turned out.
"Always."
A beat passed, and from your periphery, you saw him tap the blanket in front of you to get your attention.
"Hey, you're gonna be okay," he said. "One day, you will go hide in a bunker in the Siberian winter to wait for tigers like a crazy person—"
"Okay, wait, out of all the examples you watched in the doc, you chose—"
"Anyways!" He grinned at the look you sent him, unfazed. "We're both gonna be okay, alright? We're chasing dreams, and sometimes the chase is hard, but the reward is sweet."
You knew he was right; of course he was right. Talking things out was always a good idea, especially with a trusted person, and who better to trust than Kevin Moon? You had friends who understood, but not really understood.
You reached for his pencil with the end of yours and you bumped ends like ET. The corners of your lips curled upward as you met his gaze, and you were struck by the softness in his rich, chocolate irises. No sketch, painting, portrait could do those beautiful eyes justice. "Don't call me a nerd for this."
"No promises."
You fixed him with a look. "There's this thing that plants do called phototropism. Because plants need light to synthesize into food and energy, they often turn and grow towards the nearest light source. So even in, let's say, a dark hole in the ground—if there's a crack in the roof that brings light in, the plant will grow in that direction, and probably grow its way out." You cleared your throat. "Thanks for showing me the light."
Kevin's eyes shone big and wide, doe-like you liked to say, almost in awe of the explanation of a basic function plants performed to survive. But twisted in a certain way, and one could apply it to everyday non-plant life, as well.
"Now how can I possibly call you a nerd after that?" His voice went raspy and he had to clear it, too. "I think I'm getting misty-eyed," he said, fanning his eyes.
You chuckled at his antics. "Oh, hush. I guess it's my way of saying thanks for reminding me I'm not gonna be a failure." It was scary how often you thought about it, especially at college.
Kevin reached over and warmed one of your hands with his. "You're not gonna be a failure, Yn. I promise you that."
All of the kids were asleep in the back of the Kims' minivan, and it took two trips back and forth between the car and the living room to transfer all four sleeping munchkins. By the time Jin and Yuna were done, the former was certain he was going to need a cane much earlier in his life than previously anticipated.
He held his back as they made their way out onto the back porch. "I think I'm aging faster," he said to his partner.
Yuna sputtered out a laugh. "Aye, so dramatic, and for what? You're gonna survive."
"No sympathy," he sighed melodramatically as he hung off her frame. "I wonder where everyone else is."
His voice trailed off as they stood on the porch and overlooked the valley below. Just further out, they could easily see the occupants of the big oak tree between yours and the Moons' houses. You and Kevin sat slightly angled toward one another, not quite sitting next to each other, but not quite facing each other either.
The laughter was apparent on your faces as Kevin showed you something on his iPad. You grabbed the screen with ill-concealed delight, your eyes lighting up like a pair of fireflies. "No, oh my god, the little sprout on top of my head! You didn't!"
Yuna murmured softly to her lover with a chuckle, "Should we go say hello?"
Seokjin adjusted his position so now his arm rested around her shoulders. A smile etched onto his face at the view; he was so fond of the very thing neither you nor Kevin could see just yet. "Well, how could you possibly want to break that up?"
EPISODE EIGHT: NOD AND SMILE… YUP.
YOU weren't really sure why it took so long before you all deigned to take a proper dip in the lake, but as they said, better late than never.
The sun beat down on the little lake population, even at ten in the morning, which made it perfect weather to go swimming. Your house was a-bustle with life, thunderous footsteps, and motherly yelling to her children of “You better all have sunscreen on!” You were just finishing up the task yourself, rubbing in the last handprint of sunblock onto your calf before you were grabbing your towel at the end of your bed and heading out.
You caught Alice coming down the stairs with her floral one-piece on and a set of blue goggles strapped to her head. This morning, her hair was in two braids. “Do you have sunscreen on?” You asked her as you opened the back screen door.
“Yes,” she groaned as if this was the hundredth time she’d been asked that question today. Knowing your family, it probably was the hundredth time. “Do we still have the flamingo floatie?”
“We can probably pop down to the shed and see,” you suggested. You blinked in surprise at the person you found leaning against the railing of your back porch. “Why hello there.”
Joshua glanced up from the piece of string in his hands that he had tied at the ends to form one, large ring. “Hi guys! Either of you ladies know how to play Cat’s Cradle?” His hands slipped in between the string so that the ring rested on the backs of his fingers. In a movement that sent a wave of nostalgia down your spine, he maneuvered his hands through the string to form the zigzag pattern correspondent with the beloved childhood game.
“Ooh! Me, me!” Alice bounced around on the balls of her feet and rushed over to where Josh was to pick out the next pattern.
The screen door behind you opened up again as soon as you stepped foot onto the deck. Your dad appeared with your little brother, both of whom were dressed in rash guards and swim trunks. Your dad hustled his son along. “Yn-ah, we’re going down to the shed to get swimming things. Wanna come?”
“Wait, Daddy, can we get the flamingo floatie?” Alice asked your dad. Joshua finished up the next pattern, and your sister was quick to grab the next.
“Sure. We have to go now, though.”
With little else left to say or do, your dad ferried your little siblings off and around the house to where the shed was. It was tucked out of the way somewhere between your house and the Kims’ place.
You sidled up beside Joshua and slung your towel over your shoulder, noting his tank top and shorts. “You going for a swim with us?”
He gestured to his attire, nodding. “Seems like it. My parents wanted to run into town to do some shopping, see the sights. Your mom mentioned last night that you all were planning to go swimming today, so I thought I’d tag along, if that’s okay.”
“Yeah, man—it’s totally cool.”
You gazed far out toward the lake down the lawn. There were already a few people there, including Kevin and the Kims. Sana and Leena were already frolicking around in the water with their dad, while Yuna and Kevin stood off to the side on the dock. It seemed that Yuna had brought down a pair of foldable chairs to set up there, perhaps to soak up a little sun.
The two of them exchanged a couple more words before Yuna left him there so she could go pick up Leena from falling face-first in the water. Leena was still an infant, after all.
You decided that this would be a good time to run and join him, but your thoughts slowed to a halt when Kevin picked up the bottom hem of his shirt and pulled it over his head. You even heard Joshua beside you lose his breath. The sunlight had to be a paid actor or something, because the way it glowed across your friend’s shoulders, enunciating the firm muscles in his back, had to be illegal in nature.
Joshua’s low whistle of appreciation met your ears. “Wow… he’s ripped.”
You nodded absentmindedly. “Yeah.” Whoops, did you say that out loud?
The man simply chuckled and bounded down the porch. “C’mon, Yn. Let’s go join them before he catches you staring.”
If there was anything else that you and Kevin took seriously besides rock-skipping, it was the game Marco Polo. The rules were simple: an elected tagger would play with their eyes closed, yelling out “Marco” in order to locate other players in the water. The tagger had three or five opportunities to open their eyes (this was enforced for safety reasons) in order to tag everyone. Those who were not the tagger were required to reply with “Polo” in response to the tagger’s call.
Boundaries of the game ranged from your house to Kevin’s house, and no hiding beneath the dock. (Only the tagger could pass beneath that zone.)
By the time it was Kevin’s turn to tag, nearly an hour and a half had gone by, and you could feel the sun’s rays seeping into you. The heat was getting to you, and by the looks on everyone else’s faces, it was getting to them, too. But… one last round never hurt anybody.
"Are you guys ready?" Kevin's mom stood on the dock with her hands on her son's shoulders. Kevin's eyes were screwed shut where he sat on the edge of the dock, his feet swinging where they dangled over the water. Everyone stood scattered in the water, biding their time before Kevin's mom let him hop in.
She surveyed the surrounding water for nods of confirmation. You lingered just at the outer edge of the boundary, face half in the water with your eyes peeking out to hide your smile. You would swim back in should he come this way, but the buoy behind you kept you from cheating.
When she was satisfied with what she saw, she patted him on the shoulders. "Okay, Kevin."
He lowered himself into the water. "Marco!"
"Polo," came the wary response, a voice from every corner and reach of the boundary, it seemed.
He honed in on a voice—not yours, it seemed, but Uncle Jin's—and slowly treaded over toward that direction. You saw your uncle's eyes widen in fear, and he ducked under the water for a swift second to attempt at a silent getaway.
"I can hear you," Kevin chuckled as he swung his arm over his head to adopt a freestyle stroke. The tone of his voice sounded awfully menacing.
"YAH! GET AWAY FROM ME!" Jin screeched, no longer trying to stay quiet.
One by one, Kevin picked people off. Yuna had a little disadvantage since she had Sana clinging to her back the whole time, so she was given a merciful second life. But when she was caught once more, it was onto dry land for her and her daughter.
Kevin treaded water on the other side of the boundary. In the water, it was just you two.
"Fighting, Yn-ie!" Jin cheered from the shore. A towel was draped over his shoulders with Sana sucking on a watermelon by his leg.
You saw your siblings and Josh raise up their fists in encouragement. "Get him, Yn!"
"Wow, thanks guys," Kevin replied dryly, shaking the water out of his hair. His eyes were miraculously still closed; you had no idea how and when he got so good at this. He still had one more opportunity to open his eyes.
You grinned. "Are you sure you're not cheating by the way?" You drawled with a feigned look of consideration, as if he could see what you looked like.
He gasped. "Me? Cheating? My abilities are far greater than the need to cheat."
"Okay, prove it."
Why did the universe curse you with such a big fucking mouth?
A swear left you as he launched himself across the safe zone. It was like he knew exactly where you had been hovering in order to reach his ridiculously long arms over his head to try and tag you. You gunned out of the way, narrowly missing the dock as you backstroked back from where he came to avoid him.
"Marco!"
"Screw you—polo!"
His white teeth glistened as he grinned, eyes closed completely shut still. Damn. "I can smell fear."
"Sometimes you can be so dramatic," you taunted.
"Now that's just hurtful." And he took it personally.
Around and around you both went, lakewater thrashing as your arms and legs kicked and pumped as hard as you could. You felt so agile and free at times, a dolphin in your own right.
There was a lull in the game for a minute when you managed to evade Kevin's grasp yet another time. He was patrolling the other side of the dock while you loitered just around the corner, by a post. You could hear on land that everyone had turned their attention away from yours and Kevin's competitiveness in favor of the bag tossing boards Kevin's dad brought out.
"Oh, Yn," he smiled, brushing a hand through his hair absentmindedly. "I'm gonna get ya."
If you weren't worried about being so close to him, you would have thrown a retort right back.
But there was another poor, poor hinge to your plan, and that was the very core of the game you were playing.
He whispered, "Marco."
You screamed internally. "Polo," you whispered, barely audibly.
His head whipped in your direction, and before you could even blink, he used his shortcut beneath the dock to yank your wrist back toward him. "Gotcha!"
"Goddamn it," you groaned as you rested up against the post behind you. The water in this area was just shallow enough that your feet could reach the bottom.
Kevin chuckled as he finally opened his eyes. He blinked feverishly to adjust to the sunlight, then ran a hand through his slicked-back hair. He was so close that you could see the water droplets on his head dribble down the sharp slope of his nose. He took in his surroundings, a sly kind of smirk curling up onto his face. "No hiding beneath the dock, Yn."
"I technically wasn't beneath the dock," you shot back.
"Mhm," he pressed his lips together, brows furrowing. He moved closer and braced one arm against the post above your head. "Say I believe you."
You brushed the sudden butterflies in your stomach away as the heat melted your brain (and not Kevin). "That sounds like you don't believe me."
"Well, either way…" He brought a finger close to your face and tapped your nose. You could have sworn you saw his eyes dart downwards for a second, away from your eyes, toward your mouth. "I win."
EPISODE NINE: KINDLING FOR ALL KINDS OF FIRES
A campfire was always in order.
There were quite a few things that needed to be done before it could happen, however. One of the few things on the list just happened to be going out to find firewood, as well as filling up the bird feeders you left hanging out in the forest beyond. You could kill two birds with one stone. (Definitely not literally though. You hoped you never needed to kill two birds with one stone unless it was for pure survival purposes.)
The bird seed you'd requested to be brought back was… somewhere around here. You couldn't remember where exactly Auntie Yuna said they put the bag, but you would go hunting for it.
You meandered through the first floor of your lake cabin, gradually approaching the kitchen area where you heard voices. As far as you were aware, your parents were holed up in the kitchen with Kevin’s parents, as well as Kevin himself. Your siblings were probably either upstairs or at the Kims’ place. Probably.
“—know Judy’s daughter, right?” You recognized your mom’s voice among the fray. By this time, you stood in the middle of the living room with your hands on your hips. Where in the world was that sneaky bag of bird seed?
Kevin’s mom replied next, “Ah, she’s doing that drawing major or something, right? I forgot what it’s called—”
“Animation,” supplied her husband.
“Yes, that’s the one.” A clinking of metal on china; they were most likely digging into the trifle cake that was assembled earlier in the day.
“I hear there’s something going on and it’s getting more difficult to find work for them.”
A disgruntled sound. “Yah. That's the risk that comes with those art majors. If she had gone into bioengineering like Judy wanted her to, then she wouldn’t be worrying so much.”
You paused from your position in the living room. From your vantage point, you got a clear view into only part of the kitchen, but it was where Kevin lingered with his back to one of the cabinets. He had a bowl of dessert in one hand, the other using the tines of his fork to prod at a bite of cream and cake. His head was tilted down though, and you caught his periodic glances toward the part of the kitchen you couldn’t see where the adults probably were, prattling on and on as if he weren’t standing right there.
Your heart sunk to the pit of your stomach.
Why was he subjecting himself to this? Why didn’t he just pick himself up and leave—? The thought came to you that maybe he thought he deserved to hear this.
Having surveyed the living room enough to know that the bird seed wasn’t here, you did happen to note the presence of his camera sitting on the coffee table. You snatched the device up and headed for the kitchen.
“I think it’s good to cultivate creativity, but there’s a difference between a career and hobbies—”
“Psst.” You grappled onto the side of the doorway, quietly catching Kevin’s attention.
His head perked up at the sound and his eyebrows shot up in question. He offered the bowl in his hands to you. Want some? He mouthed.
You shook your head, then used your free hand to wave him over. Bird seed?
He seemed to understand. With one, massive bite, he finished the rest of his bowl, deposited it in the kitchen sink, then quietly slipped out of the room with you.
When the two of you were in the clear and you were following him over to the closet beneath the stairs (damn, had you really forgotten that this closet existed?), you handed him his camera. “I’m invoking rescue protocol,” you told him.
Kevin accepted his camera with a furrowed brow, watching as you opened up the closet door and found a canvas sack of birdseed sitting there. Huzzah! “Wait, but…” He considered you for a moment, and a slow smile slid onto his face. He ducked his head and threw his camera strap around his neck. “I appreciate you. Have I told you that?”
“And I—” You grunted as you picked the bag up into your arms and used your foot to kick the door closed. “—appreciate you. How’d you know this was where the bird seed was?”
“I just remembered what Uncle Jin said,” he told you with a shrug.
The two of you meandered out of the backdoor and onto the porch in a silent agreement to go fill some bird feeders together. The forest at this time of day was streaked in golden sunlight, emerald green leaves painted over in an amber wash of glitter. It felt warm and comfortable like autumn, but with the color palette of summer. The air was fresh, not crisp, and there was still a dollop of pollen floating around in the air from the tailend of spring.
You and Kevin entered the forest proper, and you shifted the bag into your right hand when you finally got the bag’s handles up and at ‘em. “I know the protocol wasn’t meant for those kinds of situations,” you started.
Kevin let his camera rest in his hands at midriff once he had fiddled with the settings enough to his liking. “I know.”
“They’re wrong, you know?” You turned to look at him as you stopped at the first feeder and let the sack of seed and grain fall to your feet with a thump against the earth. Before you opened up the bag, however, you peered up into the wooden house hanging from the branch, slobbered in messy paints and melting smiley faces. There wasn’t a speck of grain or seed left in this one. Satisfied, you bent down to rip the bag open and take out a scoop with your hands.
The shutter of a camera lens fired. He sighed, lowering the camera so he could inspect the test shot he took. “I’ve come to terms with that—all of their opinions, I mean.” He lifted the viewfinder back up to his eye and took another shot as you shoveled the bird seed into the hole. A small stream of it missed and tumbled to the forest floor. “Sometimes I do think like that, though. Whether or not I should have stuck with psychology and become a teacher instead of photography.”
You folded the edge of the bag over itself after dusting your hands off, and the two of you continued onward. “Are you happy with photography though? Do you like the things you’re learning, the work you’re doing?” That was one of the few metrics that kept you clinging onto your dreams—your hands were getting scraped and sweaty holding onto the side of the cliff face, but even though your shoe slipped against the ledge and threatened a long drop, you held on. Some days, you thought it was a sad, desperate effort; others, you found extra strength to dig your soles in.
He didn’t have to think much before answering. “Yeah, I do. It’s… it’s fulfilling.” He shot you a glance. “I guess it’s something I enjoy so much that most days it doesn’t even feel like work. All of the logistic, ‘real world,’ adult stuff is kind of a headache, but…” Even though his sentence trailed off, you could still follow.
You plopped the sack of seed down on the ground beneath the next bird feeder. “I know that it’s hard to think about what-ifs, and I’m kind of a hypocrite about it, too—but I think—” you scooped up a handful of bird seed and poured it into the opening. This house had a little sunshine painted on the roof. “—Kevin, I think you made the right choice. Obviously, it shouldn’t matter what I think; that’s just what I’ve observed so far.”
“It matters what you think,” he replied quietly. “To me, at least.”
The two of you shared a smile as you dusted your hands off again. The chase is hard, but the reward is sweet—those had been his words to you the other day.
“Do you want me to carry that for you?” He mused, in view of your struggle to pick the damn thing off the ground.
You suddenly gained a spurt of strength and energy. “I’m—great.”
His low chuckle followed you as you went. You could hear his shutter go off again.
“Thank you for assuring me that I took the right risk.” Kevin fell into step beside you once more with his camera cradled in his hands. There was a softness to his eyes again, a kind of tenderness you recognized only when it was just the two of you.
You went for a smile. “I feel you, you know? Maybe not on the same level, but you’re not in crisis alone, okay?”
His shoulder bumped against yours. “Get on my level,” he jested.
Your smile haplessly curled up further. “Yeah, yeah, you five year old.” You leaned over his arm to peer at his camera screen. Your heart hammered, blood spiking, when you saw what the subject of all his shots had been thus far. “Oh my god, have you been taking pictures of me?”
He giggled at your reaction. "What? What else am I supposed to be taking pictures of?"
"Uhm?" You gestured with your arm in a wide arc. "There is literally a whole world around us. Nature is much more photogenic than I am." A nervous laugh bubbled out of your chest as you adjusted a lock of hair that had gotten in your face.
"You are totally photogenic," he scoffed. "Literally look."
The two of you stopped in the middle of the path so he could show you the pictures he had taken thus far. Like most people when they saw a picture of themselves, you wanted to grimace, but you tried to search for what Kevin was seeing.
They were all incredible candid shots. The color was so vivid and bright, the edges crisp and focused. He had captured you at the moment when you were smiling, peeking into the bird feeder. It was that split second before the smile bloomed into something bigger when it only teased at the corner of your mouth.
You leaned back and coughed. "I only look good because you made me look good."
"Now that's bullshit."
You both resumed your walk to the next bird feeder. He said to you, "You can't possibly appreciate nature's beauty without appreciating your own, Yn."
You tilted your head and sent him a sidelong glance. "Why did that sound actually profound?"
"What do you mean actually profound?" His face arranged into an expression of offense. "Am I not regularly profound?"
You smiled to yourself. "I mean… if you had to ask—" Click! "Hey, now wait a minute!"
He beamed something boyish at you from over his camera lens. "Whoops?"
The bird seed bag thumped onto the forest floor again and you moved to check the inside of the next bird feeder. To your utter delight, you were greeted by the sight of sticks and mud and leaves slotted together in a messy riffraff, otherwise known as a bird's nest. You could hear the bright chirping coming out from the feeder's hole, and dark gray feathers poked out.
"We won't disturb these ones," you whispered, backing away to collect your bird seed. But before you left, you took a little of the grain to sprinkle on the outer landing ledge.
You didn't even realize you had been smiling out of pure giddiness until you reached the next feeder on the path. You had always secretly hoped that a bird would take over one of the houses as their own. Lo and behold, that hope manifested into reality.
Kevin helped you out with the next one since this tree was hung with a duplex. It was similar to a human duplex; the house was split down the middle to hold double the feed. The two of you carefully transferred seed and grain into its proper place.
"If you really are uncomfortable with me taking pictures of you," he said as the two of you picked up where you left off, "then I can totally delete them." He made a gesture with his hand. "No harm, no foul."
Heat rose to your cheeks. "It doesn't bother me that much," you admitted sheepishly. "They were good pictures."
"See!" Elated, he slung an arm around your shoulders and tugged you against his side with an affectionate shake. "You see the vision? Do you see it now?"
You couldn't possibly say no to him when his expression was brighter than the sun at high noon. At this moment—this perfect moment—when the sunlight streaming through the trees painted his face in a filter of buttery gold… you could definitely see the vision, but perhaps not the exact one he saw.
EPISODE TEN: YOU WOULD NOT BELIEVE YOUR EYES…
"OH, thank god, you guys went and got firewood!" Jin pressed his hands together in prayer as he jogged over to you and helped transfer the lumber in your arms over to his. On your way back from replenishing the bird feed, you let Kevin hold the remainder of what was left in the bag while you picked up any spare tinder for the fire. There were quite a few loose sticks around that would work nicely for the campfire tonight.
He walked off with your gatherings from the trip, and you and Kevin continued up to your lake house to drop off the bag of bird seed.
"So you were saying about the animal representation thing?" You piped up, recalling where the two of you last ended before your return to home base.
"Oh!" Kevin grinned. "It's so funny because some of my friends—you can totally see the resemblance of an animal, right? But then others don't really get an animal. Like Younghoon: he's just kind of bread."
You nearly tripped over a patch of dirt. "Bread?" You stammered incredulously. "Come again?"
"Bread," he nodded. He murmured in thanks to you when you slid open the screen door for him so he could shuck off his shoes and step inside the house. "But Changmin's a squirrel. Or a giraffe. That's what JC!Yn calls him, anyway; it's because of his long neck."
"Huh," you pondered. Interesting friend group they had going on there. You wondered what you would be…
As you passed by your bedroom on the first floor, you could hear your phone sounding off in aggressive vibrations even through the wooden walls and the closed door. You swore under your breath and pushed into your room to turn it off, then paused when you realized why it had gone off in the first place.
Fireflies.
"Everything okay?" Kevin's voice came back around the bend, his head poking into the space and the bird seed bag nowhere to be seen. He must have put it away just now.
You glanced up at him as you silenced the alarm and tucked your phone into your pocket. You hadn't needed it all that much this entire trip, but you would definitely hold onto it tight tonight. "Huh? Oh, yeah. Ready to head out?"
He didn't question your behavior and nodded. "Ready when you are."
Sometimes campfire smoke burned Kevin's eyes, but that was mostly when he was younger and didn't know any better. The embers of the fire were always so warm and inviting, always luring him toward it and inviting him to stare into its core. He could still feel the sting of the ash in his pupils as he looked at it from afar now.
The summer sun had sunken down into the horizon and gave way to a comfortable nightfall. Above your heads hung curtains of leaves from oaks, and above them was the blanket of night sky bedazzled in stars. Nature, as you had said earlier today, was quite photogenic.
He sat perched slightly away from everyone in the group, settling at the picnic table with his back to the table surface so he could still face into the fire. When everyone regrouped, Joshua had brought along an acoustic guitar and played it for everyone now.
"Sunday morning, rain is falling."
Someone lit up in a small hoot of approval. Kevin observed the group before him, the several families that had come together. He was especially pleased that the Hongs and the Xus were still hanging out with the lot of them, the latter being around a little less, but still coming out to join the fun, nonetheless.
He hadn't even realized when the last time his mom tried blatantly pushing him towards Serena. At some point, she stopped and it slipped his mind.
"Clouds are shrouding us in moments, unforgettable. You twist to fit the mold that I am in."
Kevin scratched his jaw as he turned his eyes down to the iPad settled in his lap. After he had finished up dinner, he ran inside to swap out his camera for his device to get some sketching done. There wasn't a particular project he was working on; he just wanted to practice a little.
When he lifted his gaze back up to pick a subject, he found himself looking in your direction. Your dad and Connor brought out the goodies to make s'mores. Long, slim skewers were passed around the circle, and the kids were the first to receive marshmallows to spear.
You and your sister sat beside one another and you helped her grab two of the mallows to impale. The light from the fire flickered across your face in differing levels of shadow, a play on contrast. Your expression seemed softer here—he wasn't really sure what it was. Maybe it was the tenderness at the corner of your eyes as you laughed at Connor's marshmallow falling burnt into the pit; maybe it was the triumph you shared with Alice when you helped her sandwich her marshmallows between a slab of chocolate and twin graham crackers.
He liked to believe his hand started before he consciously knew what he was doing.
"That may be all I need… In darkness, she is all I see."
"Are you sure you don't want me to make you one?" You asked your brother as he grabbed his redemption marshmallow from the bag.
Connor huffed, puffing out his chest. "I got this."
Your eyebrows flew upward. "Okay, big guy. Have at it." You chuckled and grabbed a marshmallow for yourself, sticking it onto your skewer to let it broil over the heat.
Kevin traced the lines of your face with his eyes, his hand transferring that memorization onto his screen. Sometimes human expressions were a little difficult to portray accurately, and there was a thorn pricking the back of his mind, urging him to do you justice. He didn't know if he could.
Your head slowly swayed to the sound of Joshua's pretty melody, the corners of your mouth tilting upward. Kevin shifted his position on the bench and drew the little tick mark at the edge of your mouth for that slight smile.
He always knew you were beautiful—for fuck's sake, he'd practically said it today in the forest. It had been among the crush of other important conversations, but he meant it. He still had the image of you engraved in his brain, the moment when you discovered the family of birds in the feeder house. You'd lit up like a goddamn star.
You stood up from your spot once your marshmallow became the perfect golden tone over the edges. You stepped over to the chair that held all the ingredients and smooshed the marshmallow between chocolate and cracker. Then, you turned and marched over to him.
Surprise alerted in his features, and he subtly tilted the screen of his iPad up against his chest. "Hey," he greeted softly while you approached.
You returned the expression and held out the s'more to him. "Here. It's for you."
The organ in his chest did a somersault. "What?" He laughed, "For me?"
"Yeah, silly. I don't know why you're so far away, but I know you like 'em." You settled on the bench next to him with one arm braced behind you on the table and your legs crossed, one over the other.
"Thank you," he said, using one of his hands to bite into it with childlike giddiness. The mixture of flavors exploded in his mouth—the crunch of the graham cracker, the soft, gooeyness of the chocolate and marshmallow. A perfect, sweet treat, and done exactly right. "Mmmh, this is so good," he mumbled behind his hand to catch any crumbs on his lips.
You chuckled. "Nice, glad it has your stamp of approval." Your eyes wandered down to his iPad, and you could see the white screen lit up against his shirt. "What have you been up to?"
His eyes widened a smidge, and there came a bashfulness to his face. (Cute.) "Oh, uhm," he swallowed down the remainder of the s'more and tilted the screen away from you. Huh, strange. "It's nothing really. Just sketching."
You hummed in understanding, though it was a little out of character for him to hide it from you. "Ah, I see."
The two of you descended into silence, and you leaned your back against the table to get comfortable. Kevin passed you sidelong glances from the corner of his eye, unsure of how you knew he wanted you to stay. (Because he definitely did want you to stay.)
Perhaps this was a sign. Thoughts had been brewing in his head as of late, and he wasn't quite sure what to do with them. They all just… sort of piled up in his hands and he didn't know how to free them up to reach out to you.
He opened his mouth to say something—anything—maybe even about the pact—to retract the pact?—it didn't matter.
But when he turned to look at you this time, your gaze was elsewhere. That soft, tenderness remained, but you had turned your attention to Joshua.
Ah. He shouldn't have jumped so soon. A hopeless kind of ache twisted in his stomach that made him uncomfortable. He briefly glanced down at his screen of what he'd sketched of you so far and decided it might be better to finish it later.
Fireflies. You nearly forgot that you planned to sneak out and see fireflies tonight.
By the time the campfire was cleaned up and everyone was tucked away into their beds, it was probably nearing midnight. You quietly rustled around your room in the dark and used only your phone's flashlight to gather things into a little knapsack—just the essentials, of course. There was no need to get fancy with it.
You wished you had signal so you could text Kevin and warn him ahead of time that you were about to go appear at his window, but you figured it would be fine anyhow. Even if he wasn't awake, the excitement buzzing inside of you could hardly wait.
Shouldering your bag, you headed out the door and crossed the divide between your house and the Moons'.
You located Kevin's window on the second floor, quietly rejoining when you realized it was cracked open. This had to be fate; what other reason would his window be open? (Clearly not for the cool, evening breeze or anything…)
You cupped your hands around your mouth. "Kevin!" You stage-whispered. "Kevin!"
A moment later, a head popped out the open frame. His hair stuck up a little bit and his eyes squinted down into the darkness at you. "Yn?"
"Yes," you said with a grin that he probably thought was idiotically too large. You waved him down. "I'm gonna go see fireflies!"
It took him a second to compute. "What time is it?"
"Like, midnight."
"Okay."
Seven minutes later, Kevin emerged from the back door with a T-shirt and sweatpants on, a yawn splitting his face. He shook his head out as if he was shaking out the remaining remnants of sleep from his system. You met him on the back stairs.
"So what's this about fireflies?" He asked you as the two of you ventured off into the wilderness.
Last year when you were up here at the lake, there was one night when sleep refused to take you. Your solution had been to go on a walk, and as completely dangerous as that sounded (because it was), you'd stumbled upon the meadow you now took Kevin toward. You hadn't the faintest why you never knew about this place after years of coming up to the lake town, but it was where the fireflies took flight.
The meadow was not too long a walk from where you both lived, and by the time you arrived, Kevin was wide awake.
"It's just over this crest," you told him, the jubilation in your voice nearly spilling over.
Kevin smiled at the sound of your excitement and eagerly followed you up the hill.
As soon as you made it over, you lost all your breath in awe. The meadow sprawled at your feet for miles was completely a-glow. Little beads of yellow-green light dotted the field in every corner like light bulbs strung together by invisible string. You had only ever seen this once in person, the rest via the internet and popular culture (movies, TV shows, and the like), and yet, it never compared to the real life experience.
You and Kevin stood there for a moment to soak in the sight. What a wonder of nature this was.
When you finally gained the sense to, you dug around in your bag for wherever you'd stashed your phone. Your tongue stuck out of the corner of your mouth as you fidgeted with the settings on your phone camera. You just wanted one little picture to show one of your professors at school, but it seemed your camera-working skills left much to be desired.
"Here, let me," Kevin murmured and gently took the phone from you. He showed you the screen as he fixed the settings—et voilà! Like magic, the field before you became visible on your camera screen in the crispiest, sexiest quality you had ever seen. "And… there you go."
He clicked the photo for you and handed you back your phone.
Mouth agape, you zoomed in on your completed photo. "Thanks, Kevin!" You gushed as you admired his handiwork.
He clasped a hand against the back of his neck. "No worries. Just a few tricks I learned."
You still warmed at the gesture. With your phone now tucked away, the two of you could sink back into the glory of the field of fireflies.
You heard Kevin's voice, soft, "How do they light up like that?"
"Bioluminescence," you replied in a whisper back. "It's a biochemical reaction that basically lets them convert energy into that light you see." There were plenty of other examples of bioluminescence in nature, as well. One particular instance you'd read about once, was a wave of bioluminescent algae appearing on the shores of a Southern Californian beach during the summer. It was neat stuff.
"Wild," he marveled.
A wave of calm fell over your form. You'd never felt so at peace in your life—just you, the outdoors, and one of the few people who made you actually feel this comfortable. You swallowed at the thought.
You were suddenly hyperaware of how close you were standing to him, the backs of your hands grazing against each other. You could feel his skin, his knuckles against yours—and maybe your brain was making it up, but the touch felt intentional.
For a second, you indulged yourself in what it might be like to close the distance and take his hand into yours. Of course, it wouldn't have to be in the romantic way; friends could hold hands… right? They could hold hands and your heart could skip several beats and he could look at your lips, and you would still be friends. Right?
You cleared your throat, and the sound seemed to thunder in the silence. "We should—we should probably head back," you said, sparing a glance at him.
He caught your eyes and held them. His lips turned upward, and the shine in his eyes was fond. "Okay."
With renewed energy, you made the trek back into the neighborhood. Your bucket list items for the summer had nearly all been checked off—not like you had a physical list written out. These were simply traditions you hoped to fulfill every summer while you were here in your happy place.
The crickets chirped a lovely serenade as you and Kevin strolled back onto the street where your houses stood. At the point where you both needed to split off, you nudged him with your elbow. "Thanks for coming out with me tonight."
"Thank you for inviting me," he countered with an amused hum.
"Good night, Kev."
You both lingered for a second. "Good night, Yn," he said back, pausing for a moment. Then he leaned over toward you and pressed his lips to the crown of your head. Your eyes fluttered shut. "Hope the lovebugs bite."
EPISODE ELEVEN: ROCKING THE BOAT
IF there was one thing that Kevin Moon was good at (besides the myriad of things he was actually good at), it was waking up his cousin to exercise with him in the morning.
"I think I deserve a nice, fat stack of pancakes after this," Yuna grumbled after nearly tripping over a raised tree root and kissing the forest floor. She grappled onto her cousin's shoulder to steady herself, the cousin in question giving a light chuckle at her antics. "When your mom said we should exercise together, I thought she meant the next time I was in Vancouver, not right now."
"Well, it's only because Yn's mom planned to go out with my mom this morning," Kevin mused. "Usually I have a designated walking partner."
"Woe is me. Alas, I have become your Plan B," Yuna sighed melodramatically with a hand draped over her forehead.
This morning, at a lovely 9:46am, the lake and its surrounding forest was just as alive and awake as Kevin was. The sun had taken up its perch in the clear, blue sky and the birds had long since begun their morning songs. They were awfully loud at this part of the lake, the exact three-quarter mark around the perimeter. Kevin thanked his parents for choosing houses away from this area—he would have never slept ever if they bunkered up here. (Not that he slept anyway, but that was beside the point.)
The walk began a little later than he usually did with your mom, but he granted Yuna a bit of leeway since she hadn't exactly been given a head's up. (He argued the opposite, but he let this once slide.)
"You're so dramatic," he chided playfully. "Watch out for that rock."
Yuna's mouth morphed into a deep frown, eyes wide open, as she narrowly missed being nature's fool another time. "Oh, speaking of Yn… Yn's mom? Whatever, I just mean Yn."
Kevin perked up at the topic change. His brain was fresh from last night's midnight endeavor with you and the fireflies. His lips still tingled from when he ventured to kiss you on the head… he wasn't sure where that courage had come from, but the memory of it kick-started his heart into a gallop. "What about Yn?"
She shrugged. "I dunno. You tell me." A smile crawled onto her face, and Kevin could smell her slyness a mile away. "The two of you have been hanging out a ton recently."
"We usually stick together," he sniffed, fidgeting absentmindedly with the beads on the bracelet you'd made him.
"Aish," she pressed her features into an unimpressed look that reminded Kevin of a typical Chanhee deadpan. "You're so unhelpful. You know what I'm talking about!" She smacked the side of his arm, and Kevin erupted into a fit of laughter.
His smile grew shy. "I don't really know what to say! I'm sorry—that's the truth." Because how could he even begin when it came to you? Where did it end, where did it begin?
"I see the way you look at her, Kev."
Kevin shoved his hands into his shorts. Suddenly the bird nest he spotted in a nearby tree became all too interesting. The bird nest reminded him of the birds who had made a home out of one of your feeders, and that reminded him of the adorable elation on your face when you discovered it and that reminded him of—he came to a stop. Oh, god, he was so far gone. "How do I look at her?"
Yuna peered at him curiously, then stopped to face him. "You look at her like I look at Jin. At least, that's how I think I look at him." She offered him a supportive smile. "But right now, you look like you're going through your midlife crisis."
"I might as well be."
She barked out a laugh. "Save that for when you buy a house, my friend."
He rubbed his temples with a wince. "Houses, domesticity, money, partners. Why is adulting so hard?"
"Hey, you'll get through it," she told him and nudged his shoulder. "What's going on, dude? What's on your mind?"
Kevin swallowed. He still hadn't the faintest idea where to begin, but everything had to start somewhere. Yuna had always been kind to him (a menace at times, but that feeling was mutual), and he trusted her with his vulnerabilities. He toed the ground. "Okay, last night, I kissed her—"
"YOU WHAT?"
He sputtered, red rushing to his face, as he grabbed her shoulders. Her eyes were practically falling out of her head. "Nonononono! Let me finish, you—I kissed her on the forehead, okay?"
Her gaping mouth closed only slightly. "Oh…" She thought about it some more. "Oh."
Kevin nodded gravely. "Yup."
Yuna straightened with a furrowed brow. "Well, that's not that big of a deal, is it?"
"What do you mean that's not a big deal?" His hands shot to the top of his baseball cap. "How is that not a big deal!"
"That's because the two of you refuse to acknowledge or entertain the obvious!"
Kevin hissed when she reached over to give his forehead a very hard flick. He rubbed the spot that began to smart; getting flicked in the forehead twice in one lake trip was twice too many. "The obvious?"
"That you guys can have the mushy gushy feelies without it being a product of the placebo effect from your moms' collective matchmaking efforts."
He made a face. "That was a lot of words…"
She deadpanned. "Kevin, listen to me: just because the two of you made a stupid pact when you were ten—"
"Eleven."
"Whatever. Eleven—doesn't mean that you can't leave room to, you know, amend that. You have to give yourself the opportunity to explore it, especially when I can clearly see that your feelings are changing about this girl." Yuna grasped her cousin by his shoulders this time in an attempt to telepathically insert these words into his brain. Or at least, just make him listen.
The words seeped into his head. The two of you had already made amendments earlier this trip, but you had never commented on the "only friends part." He even entertained the idea of bringing it up to you last night at the bonfire.
He didn't realize Yuna already began tugging him along the path to circle around the remainder of the lake to get back to the house. Everything was so muddled… but a part of him recognized that Yuna was right. He just wished he could get an idea of where your thoughts laid.
There were moments when you thought life could be like a movie, but then why was doing this pedal boat thing so much less glamorous than it seemed? Then again, maybe you shouldn't have thought doing this at high noon was the greatest idea.
You should have been like your Uncle Seokjin, who sat to your left, swallowed up in a blue lifejacket, a pair of big sunglasses, and a crocheted bonnet with a duck face to keep his face out of the sun. Yeah, maybe glasses would have been a good idea.
Sweat dribbled down the side of your face and down the slope of your nose, and you wiped it off with the back of your hand. "It's so hot, Uncle. We couldn't have waited until later today when it cooled down?"
He leaned back, his cheeks and skin reddened and damp from the heat and the fire in his calves from pedaling. "Okay, okay. Let's stop here."
"Right in the middle of the lake?" You asked incredulously, but immediately brought your feet off the pedals to give your legs a deserved break.
"What better place to do so?"
The two of you lounged in your seat beneath the molten afternoon sun, limbs screaming, water draining from your bodies through your pores. This would have been nice if you brought a sun umbrella… or maybe some water… man, did you make so many poor choices today.
"So what's going on with you and Kevin?"
The question snapped you out of your heat-fazed daze. You nearly thought you hallucinated him saying that. You stammered, "What about me and Kevin?"
You could see his overexaggerated facial expression even from behind his sunglasses. "Yah, don't give me that. You know what I'm talking about—I saw you two last night."
You lurched out of your seat and caused the violent rocking of the boat. You and your copilot let out twin swears as the boat evened out on the waves, and luckily, did not capsize. "Sorry—the fuck? You did?"
"Actually, I didn't," he snickered. "But now I know something did happen. So what's the tea, girl? Hit me with it. It's hot outside but I always take my beverages scorching." He shifted in his seat, carefully, in order to give you his full attention.
You couldn't believe he dragged you out to the middle of the lake just for this conversation. Total Uncle Seokjin move. You walked (or pedaled) right into his checkmate.
Moments of last night flooded into your brain—the campfire, the fireflies, the kiss, the… the him. Kevin. You gulped. Where did you even think to begin? "I took him to see fireflies last night."
Jin scrunched his eyebrows together. "Fireflies? Since when did we have fireflies? You didn't take me to see the fir—oh, you know, what? It was your little romantic moment; I got it."
"It wasn't a romantic moment!" You sputtered helplessly, uselessly. "It was—it was a moment of serenity and scientific marvel."
"You are such a nerd. What did he do, huh? Did you guys hold hands or something?"
Almost. "No," you said. "He… he did kiss my forehead once we got back though."
"Aha!" You both careened as the boat trembled violently from Seokjin's sudden Einstein epiphany. "I knew that something happened," he said once the boat slowed to a stop again. "I just had a feeling in my gut."
"Are you sure it wasn't the yogurt you had this morning?"
"How dare you," he huffed. "I brought my lactose pills. And hey! Stop changing the subject."
You laughed aloud, but inwardly, your gut was churning. Maybe you could blame the heat, but you knew the real reason why you were suddenly feeling as unstable as the pedal boat you sat upon. The idea that the entirety of your friendship could be so easily uprooted… well, perhaps not easily. Picking apart your friendship would be like flushing weeds out of a garden—you would have to get at the roots, and right now, the roots were so deep that you would fall into the ground before finding the bottom.
Not that you wanted to uproot your friendship, or relationship, with Kevin. Of course not.
What did that forehead kiss even mean? What did all of the moments you shared between him this summer, as a whole, even mean? Why, all of a sudden, did you want the way he looked at you to mean something different besides platonic affection? Why did you want more when you had never really thought about more before?
You voiced all of this aloud to your uncle, who sat staring out onto the calm surface of the lake. When you were finished with your ramble, he said, "You need to get your shit together, girl."
You coughed. "Thanks, that was so helpful."
"I'm told that a lot," he beamed. "But really, those are all very good questions, Yn. And they're super important, too."
You frowned, lifting the rim of your baseball cap to wipe away the perspiration collecting at your hairline like a cult. "Do you think that these mixed feelings are a result of all the matchmaking going on? Like, somehow, we've let it affect how we view each other?"
"Honestly?" He sighed, his shoulders lifting and dropping in a half-hearted shrug. "Could be. But, Yn honey, is it really such a bad thing? And let's think about it this way—how do you feel about Joshua?"
You didn't need to think too hard about it. "He's a catch, but not my type of butterfly."
"Exactly, and oh my go—"
"Don't," you chuckled menacingly, "call me a nerd."
He gestured vaguely with his hand. "I wasn't; I was gonna call you a dork."
You snorted. With another swipe at your dripping neck, you said, "But Kevin and Serena—"
"'Kevin and Serena' don't exist," he told you with a smack of his lips. Jin peered at you from over the rim of his glasses, which in kind, made the duck's beady eyes stare straight into your soul, too. "That girl bats for the other team, and Kevin has shown zero interest in her other than helping her not fall off a jet ski."
Huh. You leaned your elbow onto the knee of one leg, propped up to your chest. "Well when you put it that way…"
"When I put it that way," he finished for you, "it makes it a little clearer, hm?" You were quiet for a moment, and Jin gave your shoulder a pat. "Some things are just meant to be."
The words, so familiar to you, rang true as a bell. Some things are just meant to be. You couldn't help the smile that started to work its way onto your face, and it was all thanks to Seokjin helping you sweep away some of the webs confusing your brain. You weren't completely confident, but you could feel yourself being nudged in a certain direction, and this time, you weren't pushing back.
The tide could take you where it may.
Your uncle by association added quietly, "Haven't you thought just once that, after all this sneaking around, there's been another reason for it other than a pact?"
EPISODE TWELVE: FISH IN THE SEA, ANTS IN THE GROUND
BY the time you and Jin returned to solid ground, you discovered that Kevin was away with his dad helping the Xus pack and clean up. Today they would be departing the small lake town, as they hadn't planned on spending as much time up here as the rest of you did. You and most of the others already said your goodbyes at the campfire, so you had little else to do but twiddle your thumbs until you could confront Kevin with your thoughts.
A shower always produced productive results, especially after melting Wicked Witch of the West style in the middle of the lake.
There was time, you realized, to bring things together. Of course, there was a part of you that shied away from wanting to even address this epiphany. What if bringing this up opened up a whole new can of worms? In other words, what if talking about the elephant in the room only led to regret? You didn't want to lose Kevin, and because your families were always so close, you didn't want to lose this. This connection, this tradition, this place.
Too many memories made their home here at the lake. It was your happy place… his happy place. It was everything.
Everything could change, and wasn't that terrifying? But it could also be great, and who best to share the scariest, greatest moments of life with other than your Kevin Moon?
As rubber tire wheels ate gravel, Kevin nodded to his dad and set off back across the lawn toward your cabin. The afternoon had him busy with helping the Xus head home, which he didn't mind doing, of course; the lot of them had fun with his party, and his party with the lot of them. He and Serena left on friendly terms, undeterred by his mother's half-hearted attempt to get them sort of talking. Serena said she understood.
Kevin needed to talk to you though. After the morning was spent with Yuna getting him to see the big ass elephant in the room—trunk in his face and trumpet in his ear—there was no other course of action left but to tell you the truth.
The truth. God, the truth. The truth was that he didn't want the old pact in place anymore. That was it, plain and simple. It was crazy to think about how long the two of you had let it restrain your relationship—wait, did you want it to though?
"Hey Kevin!"
Kevin slowed to a stop, attention perking up at his name when he saw Joshua making his way over to him. He worried his bottom lip. You didn't… like Josh, did you? He just had to be sure because, well, that would throw a rock into things. "Oh, hey, man."
Joshua offered him a bright smile. "Hey. Did Serena and her parents just take off?"
Kevin cupped the back of his head. "Uh, yeah! Just now, actually."
"Cool, cool." Joshua nodded his head. "I wanted to talk to you about something."
His heart threw itself over the side of a cliff. Oh no. He let out a laugh, hoping to push the nerves out of his voice, but he was sure it wasn't too convincing anyhow. "Really? What—what about?"
"It's about Yn—" Oh, double no. "—I kind of," he winced, "noticed that her mom was trying to… nudge us together?"
"Oh god, let me be the first to apologize—"
Joshua broke the tension with a chuckle. "Hey, it's no worries! I just didn't know if you were aware or not because you and she kind of seemed like a couple to me, but I didn't know if her mom knew."
Kevin blinked, heart quickening for a different reason. "What?" He stammered. "Sorry, can we rewind?"
"Hm? That you and Yn are a thing? Are—are you not?" He gasped, eyes going wide. "Shit, that was stupid of me to just assume. Sorry if that was totally awkward!"
Oh, but quite the opposite. Kevin could feel the blood rush to his cheeks, clear as day. There was a warm feeling in his chest knowing that more people thought that you and him looked like a couple. It was ridiculous how the thought got him giddy now. Kevin shook his head though. "No, no, you're good, dude. But we aren't a couple." Yet. Hopefully.
Joshua cocked his head to the side curiously. "Oh? I guess… it's still a little strange of me to assume, so I apologize. You're…?"
"Interested?" A nod. "Yeah." (Wow, that was a verbal admittance. One step closer to the real thing.)
Kevin cleared his throat and grabbed his shoulder with his opposite hand. "You're not—you're not interested in her, are you? I mean," he rushed to add, "it's totally fine. I understand—"
Joshua shook his head. "Oh shit, no, I'm not interested. Not that Yn's a bad person or anything, but I'm taken."
Pause.
…that made sense.
Joshua laughed, ducking his head to hide the smile that blossomed on his face. "Yeah, I'm already spoken for. My parents don't really know yet, but… yeah. I didn't wanna get in the way of whatever you and Yn have, and hopefully I'm not saying this too late."
On the contrary, a weight lifted from Kevin's chest and he sucked in a lungful of summer breeze. "Nah, man. Thanks for saying it in the first place; I appreciate it."
"Yeah," Joshua said pleasantly. He nodded at him, lips pursed with one eye squinted. "She digs you, too, you know? I've seen it all throughout this trip."
Hope filled his heart like the air ballooning his lungs. He didn't know what to do with all of these. They just kept coming up onto the stack of things in his hands that he wanted to take into consideration and tell you to your face, once and for all. Your face just kept flickering in his mind's eye, and the nerves were slowly melting into excitement. He wanted to share this with you, as the two of you had done for years.
"I hope so."
Joshua clasped a hand on Kevin's shoulder. "I would say 'go get 'em, tiger,' but I have a friend at school who is scarily obsessed with tigers, so I'll just say—" A squeeze of his shoulder, "you got this."
Kevin didn't know what to do with that extra factoid, but he gave Joshua a grateful grin. "Thanks, man."
The pair split off from there, one heading back toward his own cabin, and the other, marching toward the future. Whatever laid ahead, he could take on.
His step gained a skip, and soon, he was jogging across the green until he appeared at your back porch. He hadn't really prepared anything—no romantic gestures, no flowers or candles, no chocolates. All he had were the words on his tongue and his newly realized love for you. Love, a strange phenomenon. He had his love for you stashed away in his breast pocket and it blossomed every summertime.
He let himself into the house and went poking around for you. "Yn? Yn, you back yet?"
No answer.
He ducked his head into the kitchen, the living room, before he came upon your bedroom door left slightly ajar. Through the sliver, he saw the bottoms of your feet on the bed, and he gently knocked on the door before pushing through.
"Yn…? Ah," His voice quieted to a whisper.
You were curled up over the bedsheets, asleep. Kevin slowly tiptoed his way over to you where your body was angled toward your phone screen, lying discarded on the pillow and actively running an episode of Our Planet.
A smile, fond and tender, pressed itself into his mouth. He reached over to carefully turn the downloaded episode off to descend the room in complete silence.
His head swiveled toward the foot of the bed where your patchwork quilt hung off the railing. He carefully draped it over your sleeping form, then made his exit.
You deserved the rest. And though he couldn't confess to you now, this gave him the time to ensure he got this exactly right.
EPISODE THIRTEEN: THE DAMSELS IN DEVOTION DEAL™
TIME passed by differently here.
One moment, you were biding your time and indulging in an episode of Our Planet; the next, the bedroom was dark and the house was quiet. You roused from sleep confused and delirious. You stretched your limbs up over your head, taking note of the quilt draped over your body.
Huh, you wondered how that got there.
Your eyes fluttered and squinted when you stood up and saw a flicker of amber light from outside your window. The view looked over only part of the backside to the house, so all you could see were the shadows that the campfire created. They danced by way of the breeze, their puppetmaster.
The time on your phone read a (slightly alarming) ten o'clock. You hadn't realized you slept that long. Maybe you were more tired than you originally thought.
Wait, then why was the campfire still blazing?—
"Yn! Psst!"
You pressed your face against the open slit in the window to track the sound of your name. Déjà vu swept over you as you discovered Kevin making his way over toward you from the outside. "Kevin? Is everyone still up?"
He shook his head. "No, no. I've just been waiting," he admitted sheepishly. "Come on out. Have you eaten yet?"
"Oh, no. I just woke up."
"Ah… right." He clasped the back of his neck. "Well, come out anyway. We can sit together."
Together. You liked the sound of that.
Without wasting more time, you promised him two minutes and scurried out of your room to round to the back door. The campfire crackled on your side of the lawn, rather than the middle of the properties this time, and Kevin tended to it on one of the two foldable chairs present.
You took a seat in the open seat. "S'mores?" You chuckled, noting the basket of ingredients at his feet.
He ducked his head. "Yeah," he loosened a laugh, "I thought I'd make you a s'more this time."
It was just a s'more, and yet, here was the organ in your chest palpitating in your chest. You didn't reject the s'more, of course, and watched him skewer a marshmallow and hold it over the blazing embers. As he did so, you caught the way his other hand fidgeted with your bracelet on his wrist, how his tongue darted out to wet his bottom lip. Was he as nervous as you were?
The thing, Yn.
"There's something I—" You both stopped short at your simultaneous words. They were the same, too, and had the pair of you fumbling.
"You first," you said, gesturing to him.
He hummed and tried for a smile. "Do you remember that night in sixth grade when we made the pact?"
You nodded.
"It was kind of like this actually," he mused. The marshmallow had browned into a beautiful gold, and you reached into the basket to help him assemble the chocolate and graham cracker pieces. Your fingers grazed his as he squished the outer crackers together to hand it to you. "A late night, s'mores, the campfire."
You took a chunk out of the s'more and swallowed before adding, "Seems like so long ago."
"Right?" He slipped the metal skewers back into the basket and leaned his arms onto his knees, body angled toward you. "The pact, I…" He considered his words as they melted on his tongue like the chocolate and marshmallow on yours. "I wanted to ask if you would think about another amendment."
You met his eyes now. The burning fire reflected in his dark irises, warm and bright. "An—an amendment," you parroted. Was this what you thought it was? You finished off your s'more, hoping not to choke when he told you whatever he wanted to tell you. You suddenly wondered if the s'more was just to soften the blow.
Kevin nodded. "Yeah, another amendment. We didn't really discuss the biggest part of the original pact when we made the rescue protocol."
"The 'just friends' clause," you finished, breathlessly.
"Yn, I don't wanna be just friends anymore."
It didn't hit you at first. You swore the ash from the fire was making you hear things, but it hit you, milliseconds later. "Oh."
He pursed his lips for a moment. "It's taken me a stupidly long time to come to this conclusion, and I was thinking about what we were talking about the other night—about if we were ready for relationships. And I said that maybe the person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with was someone I already met.
"Yn, I think I'm in love with you," he said. "Not just in a way that friends love each other, but something… something more. And I wanted to let you know because—if I'm being completely honest—I want to share everything with you."
You could feel the way your lips curled upward and your heart soared. "I wanna share everything with you, too. And I don't know how long I've sat on this, but what I do know is that I feel so much for you." Every admittance that was released into the night air like sparks flying was another card laid out between you two, face up. "This place, the lake, has been my place, Kevin. But I want you to be my person."
He smiled at you, sweet and boyish, the type of smile that made you feel on the edge of seventeen. He helped you out of dark places with that smile; he was always showing you the light. "Your person," he murmured, letting that sink into his tongue and be familiarized with it. "I would love to be your person, Yn."
Your hand found his across the gap between your chairs. His thumb caressed over the side of yours, and he tucked his other hand over top until you were enveloped in his clasp—safe and sound.
When the fire was reduced to nothing more than ash and memory, you and Kevin raced each other down to the water's edge. The lake was stilled beneath the moonlight, a pool of silvery mercury. You reached for his hand again and intertwined your fingers firmly, a comforting weight and hold.
It felt right.
"So since we made an amendment to the protocol again," you started as he swung your laced hands between your bodies, "we need to seal the deal."
A grin bloomed on his face, and he bit his lip. "Hear me out," he drawled. "Maybe we should update the seal, too."
You narrowed your eyes in jest. "You just don't want me to flick your forehead."
"Sue me, you flick hard," he laughed.
"But shoot."
He licked his lips and turned to face you. "Can I show you?"
Your heart gave one big lurch as he leaned over to you. You closed the rest of the distance and sighed something happy at the feel of his lips against yours. It was gentle and brief, his mouth parting from yours to give you enough room to back away.
You could feel your twin smiles. "I kind of like it."
"Yeah?" He hummed. "Well, that can be our practice round."
You shook your head and threw your arms around his neck to pull him back over to you. His arms curled around your middle, hands pressed to your sides and holding you close.
When you broke apart this time, his warm chuckle ran a delicious bolt of electricity down your spine. "I know things are gonna be different now… But we got this."
It was the way he looked at you—the one that assured you he was the same Kevin he was three years ago and beyond; the kid who broke the swing set when you challenged him to a bet; the kid who sketched butterflies in meadows, and now sketched you in the firelight; the kid who would never judge you or ridicule you for your feelings, but validate them, always. You didn't know how you were so blind to it before.
It wasn't so scary anymore, not when you knew he would be there with you.
"Yeah," you said softly, running your thumb down the back of his neck, "I'm not really worried."
He let out a breathy laugh, and it coaxed one out of you, too. Kevin pressed his forehead to yours, pressed a kiss to the tip of your nose, pressed his heart to yours.
Some things really were just meant to be.
a/n: now the question is how are they gonna tell their moms... 🤡 if you enjoyed, pls remember to reblog, or comment, or send in an ask!! thanks for reading :] see you in at your convenience!
permanent taglist: @flwoie @vatterie @seomisaho @hqrana @ja4hyvn @tinkerbell460 @kaaimins @hyunjaespresent-deobi @otterly-fey @zzoguri @floatingpluto @winterchimez @ethereal-engene @gyulfriend @polarisjisung @jaehunnyy @shakalakaboomboo @loveliestfelix @bless-311 @zhaixiaowen @leaz-kpop-life @amourdsr @pxppxrminty @kqyutie @sseastar-main @kxthleen14 @fluorescentloves @mosviqu @justalildumpling @jaerisdiction @super-btstrash-posts @jundundun @http-gyu @mvvnsseul @outrologist @vernonburger @maessseongs @ericlvr @kflixnet
#deoboyznet#bjnet#kflixnet#the boyz x reader#kevin moon x reader#the boyz fluff#the boyz imagines#the boyz oneshot#the boyz scenarios#the boyz drabbles#kevin moon imagines#kevin moon fluff#kevin moon oneshots#kevin moon drabbles#kevin moon scenarios#the boyz fanfic
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⌗ SEASONS OF LOVE ₊ ˖ ་. a 呪術廻戦 miniseries
“ ࣭⸰ ★ SERIAL ROMANTIC ; gojo satoru x fem reader
⠀ ꒰ . . episode one ! ꒱ . . . word count; 1.2k
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ᯇ remember when we first met?
⊹ ⠀⠀ you might possibly be the least helpful person in the world when it comes to making a hinge profile...gojo can attest to that.
contains; gojo satoru x fem reader, university (year 2) au, fluff, gojo's a dick, swearing, best friends to lovers, love triangle
⋆⋆⋆⠀ ⠀pm or send ask to join/be removed from taglist,,
⋆⋆⋆⠀ ⠀link to miniseries masterlist
"y'know, i'd appreciate it if you could help at least a little bit."
gojo can feel your hard glare targeting him, piercing into his skull like a red laser beam, yet still chooses to ignore you. he doesn't understand why you can't just finish unpacking later. you're kind of being a buzzkill. yes, he'd be a better friend if he continued to help you unpack your boxes and organize your cluttered dormitory; but he's got more important things to do. things that require his complete and utmost attention. things that are life or death on a college campus. things that will make or break his entire young adult experience...
...things like finishing his hinge profile!
"i promise— wait no. i pinky promise i'll put all of your shit away later, just tell me which photos to pick for this prompt, i'm stuck." he's begging and pleading for you to focus on him, which isn't unusual when dealing with a narcissist such as himself. c'mon. c'mon. gojo knows exactly how to win you over. it really isn't that hard. all he has to do is beg and whine a little, give you some puppy dog eyes, and you'll do whatever he says! there's no way he's actually going to put all of your clothes away; that'll take like...forever.
with an eye roll in response to the cheer of joy gojo lets out, you set your boxes to the side and lay beside him on the carpet. he can feel your nose tickling his neck as you lean close to see his screen, and he wonders why his heart skips a beat. eh, it's probably nothing.
"this is so dumb, satoru." you point to his screen, your finger directed at his favorite prompt so far.
don't hate me if i: have blue eyes
"okay, wait!" he flicks your forehead, laughing as you pout, and clicks on the 'add image' prompt. "it's like a thing now! girls hate guys with baby blues like mine!" being handsome is so hard nowadays.
if he asked anyone at jujutsu university who the biggest player on campus is, they'd name him off without blinking twice. while only being a freshman last year, gojo managed to become a household (or a dorm-hold?) name that'll be talked about for years after he graduates. there may be a possibility he's either flirted or made out with every girl in his graduating class, not including you, all in one school year. without the use of dating apps, he went on a total of eighty-seven first dates from august to june; albiet seeing a few girls more than a few times for some special alone time, if you get what he means; and he had the absolute time of his life and needs to recreate that thrill again.
"you don't need an app to get girls, you get plenty already."
ugh why do you always have to rain on his parade?
"obviously i don't need an app, but it's way more fun this way." he argues, "imagine if i hit a hundred first dates before may. i'd break last year's record."
"and why are you getting so butt-hurt about my dating life?" he's treading into dangerous territory. the two of you never talk about your romantic experiences, considering you never want to talk about them with him. "it's not my fault you had a total of...hm what was it? zero dates last year?"
"just find a fucking photo and get this over with."
yeah, your love life is off limits...
a chuckle rumbles from his throat as gojo continues scrolling through his camera roll, searching for a photo that screams 'boyfriend material'...or to be more specific 'one night stand material'. while he's searching for a photo that'll make girls want to sleep with him, he doesn't notice that his brightest smiles only appear in the photos with you. then again, he never notices you; and if he ever did, it's unlikely he'd date you anyways. you're his best friend. he doesn't want to ruin that. he can't ruin that, because then he'd have to imagine a life without you in it.
a particular picture stands out from the rest, and you choose to point it out. it's the two of you in your high school uniforms, standing side-by-side beneath the cherry blossoms after your third year graduation ceremony. his hair is slightly shorter and his height hadn't reached its full potential yet, but you look absolutely adorable— almost like a kitten that he's protecting from the no-good boys of the world (technically he belongs in that category, but that's besides the point).
"do you remember when we first met?" a soft hum is murmured in his ear and gojo finds the sound quite comforting.
he thinks for a moment, completely blanking as the memory escaped his mind, and takes a random guess. "middle school? english class?"
the look of disappointment on your face immediately tells him he's wrong.
"look it was a really long time ago, i know that at least." no amount of excuses will make up for his awful recollection, but he tries nonetheless. gojo satoru is a shitty friend. that's just how it is. you both know it and he tries his best to be better for you, however, he can't help the way he is. some boys are born to be boys. "i'm trying my best—"
"it's alright, just stop."
you're so upset.
"there are more important things to remember, really it's fine."
why are you so upset?
"i'm sorry," he mumbles. this feeling of guilt isn't familiar to gojo and he can't help but hate it. "i'll try to remember."
what is it that you were trying to reminisce about? he wants to know but he shouldn't pry any more, you're clearly done with the conversation and want to move on with a concentrated thinking face gracing your features. you look pretty. woah. you look really pretty. he's never thought that before. why hasn't he noticed before? suddenly, the thought of however many hinge girls want him isn't very appealing and he just wants to make you smile again. you're so pretty when you smile. his heart is beating ten times faster than usual and he's urging it to calm down, but it won't.
...maybe that's a good thing, though.
⋆⋆⋆⠀ ⠀pm or send ask to join/be removed from taglist,,
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⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀ ⊹₊｡ reblogs are greatly appreciated! ˚₊⊹
#i.e. seasons of love#୧ ‧₊˚ 🎐 ⋅ my writing#gojo x reader#gojo fanfiction#gojo satoru x reader#satoru gojo#gojo satoru#jjk gojo#gojo x you#gojo x y/n#gojo ff#gojo fanfic#gojo fluff#gojo angst#gojo satoru fanfiction#gojo satoru angst#gojo satoru x y/n#gojo satoru x you#gojou satoru x reader#satoru x reader#jjk#jjk ff#jjk fluff#jjk angst#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen x reader#geto x reader
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It's about time I show y'all my stinky CLH oc that I hate (love)
Meet Viveo! The voice of Eden and main antagonist of S2 in my dreams!
He is a podcast host, co-owner of the "Just Dance" Club, and controls all the radio stations in Eden.
(So, Rayman, but in radio form)
Viveo is arrogant and views himself higher than his peers. He may be a selfish bitch at times, but he is an entertaining guy to talk to. He knows how to keep a conversation running for as long as he pleases. He’s rather competitive however, always wanting to be the best of the best. He views Rayman more as a rival than a friend, but from the outside it doesn’t look like that. He owns his own podcast, all of the stations of Eden, and a club so he’s super successful. His TV screen works as a camera and can play back past memories of his, he could also use it to impersonate voices, which helps to make a podcast episode on a whim. Some say that his screen could hypnotize people, but no one has been able to prove it. He’s also pretty manipulative and will do anything to be the best (He maybe was the one who sent Rayman the message idkkk)
Now, no one really knows about Viveo’s past, and he’s pretty hush hush about it. He went to the same college as Rayman and the two became good friends for being different and wanting to entertain people. They graduated together and became the poster boys for Eden, with Viveo being every narrator's voice people hear on shows. The two had a pretty good bond, but Viveo found himself jealous of Rayman’s fame at times, unhappy with the lack of credit he gets. He’s a valuable aspect in the Eden machine, being able to easily persuade people. Viveo actually knows about the wrongdoings of Eden, but he doesn’t care. He’s not in poverty or scraping to survive so why bother. He knows if he speaks out against it, he’ll be fired instantly, removing everything he worked for. So, if you can’t beat them, join them.
(So, Rayman, but he's a bitch)
Viveo teams up with Red and Fakeman in S2 (who are a duo in my silly little heart). They're so of a trio, but Viveo's the leader because he's the most experienced (joining Eden around the same time as Rayman)
I love this stinky TV man with all my heart as you can tell by the millions of drawings. He wasn't my first CLH oc, but he is my dearest. Dunno, maybe I'm biased.
For funsies, y'all get an edit of him <3
#clh viveo#fun fact but when i met adi irl#this was his favorite oc of mine#so like#viveo in s2 when???#also he and rayman may or may not have dated in college idk i think it would be funny#and yes he is inspired by the VKTRS coach from just dance 3 theyre my pookie#rayman#captain laserhawk#fanart#digital art#captain laserhawk a blood dragon remix#clh rayman#clh#clh ramon#clhabdr#clh fanart#clabdr#oc#oc art#viveo#just dance#just dance 3#clh oc#captain laserhawk oc#orginal character art#orginal character#ramon#fakeman#rayplacement
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Unknown, Ep 11: To Grow Taller
Alright y’all, I just want to say that I am not super thrilled with how Episode 11 went. I felt like they completely obliterated the emotional build up to the change over after they did such a great job of navigating it in Episode 10.
So as much as there were some lovely images of hands, I’m not that interested in writing about it. So it is time, it is time to do the thing I should have done long ago.
It is time to write about Lili and San Pang.
Hands down my favorite part of this episode (and probably one of my favorite scenes of the series) was seeing the two of them interact, of seeing more of Lili’s inner workings, of understanding that she knows more than she lets on. I loved Yuan telling Qian that Lili is smart, and I loved the proud little smile Qian had when he heard that.
The most important scene in this episode, to me, starts with the height wall. That thing has been causing me psychic damage since episode one. It pans down to Lili. I like how long the camera lingers on her eyes. Lili has seen everything that has happened in their lives and she’s been spared from a lot of the violence, but that doesn’t mean she hasn’t beared witness to it.
I was really struck by her words to San Pang:
“When we were little, Qian was always there to help us with everything we did. He would measure our height every year. I always wondered when I could grow taller than him. Then I could protect him.”
I know we have seen Lili constantly take a back seat in this story. We have seen her even acknowledge Qian’s focus on Yuan multiple times throughout the show. We don’t see her doing as much for Qian as Yuan does. She doesn’t know how to wrap up leftovers, she’s not a great cook, she doesn’t try to pay the household bills. But that’s because she loves Qian like a sister does, she’s got a secure position in the household, she’s not trying to be Qian’s partner, and it is a testament to Qian’s love for Lili that she does not know how to do some of the basic life things, because it means that she’s been so well taken care of she hasn’t been forced to learn.
There are all these little elements scattered across the series that show Qian’s love for Lili. The picture on his desk at home is of him, Yuan, and Lili at Qian’s graduation. He has the magazine she’s featured in on display. He immediately softens on his anger towards her relationship with San Pang when she asks him to go on a family vacation.
She has seen how much Qian has suffered, and she loves Qian enough to want to shield him from any more harm.
And San Pang is so lovely in this scene, with his head resting on the stair railing, a sleepy look of love on his face as he stares at Lili. I love the way San Pang smiles to himself when she tells him this. Because Qian is family to San Pang and San Pang is family to Qian. San Pang loves Qian and wants what is best for him always. And I do think there is a difference there between the soft, dreamy, comfortable expression he has when looking at the woman he loves, and the small smile that lights up his eyes at the thought of Lili loving her brother enough to want to protect him.
Lili’s face is serious, and she does not always look in San Pang’s direction when she talks:
“Even though he is a few years older than us, his hands are always covered in scars and calluses.” Lili tells the ground. It’s interesting to me to see when she is comfortable enough reviving a memory to look San Pang in the eyes because she doesn’t do so until partway through her hand cream story:
“One year, I took the hand cream my classmates gave me” she looks at San Pang “and rubbed it on his hands at midnight.”
The camera cuts to San Pang who is listening to Lili absolutely enraptured by her. And I do have to commend the show for how they have navigated Lili and San Pang’s relationship change. In very few frames, with little fanfare or flare they have made San Pang and Lili’s relationship clear, understandable, and believable. We’ve had like, two minutes of them together up through now, and all I need to believe these two will be together forever is all in the way that San Pang looks at Lili. That man is not only head over heels in love with Xiao Bao, he’s ass over tea kettle in love with her as well.
“He scolded me for it. Do you know why?”
“I do.” San Pang says with a smile. And I love that because we remember that San Pang and Qian have grown up together. San Pang has been helping take care of Qian and the rest of the family for years. You know in the way that San Pang smiles that he is remembering Qian as a young man complaining about Lili lotioning his hands in the middle of the night. Hell, I can picture Qian’s rant right now. “Because it smelled like roses.”
Lili laughs and covers her face in embarrassment. “That’s right.”
But like a lot of scenes in this show, the transition from lighthearted to more serious changes on a dime. Lili’s face slips back in to a frown as she turns over a thought. “Nobody cares about Qian.”
And this is what it feels like sometimes, with how stubborn Qian is, with how much weight he wants to carry for himself, with how much debt he owes to the likes of Le, Xiong, and San Pang. But they don’t expect repayment, they did this because they care about Qian. San Pang has helped Qian weather many many storms. He has pushed when Qian needed pushing, he has pulled when Qian needed to be held back.
“Yes, they do. We all love your brother.”
Qian has so much love in his life, if only he stopped long enough to see it. If only he let go long enough to feel it. I was not thrilled with how they fumbled so much of the emotional weight of Qian and Yuan getting together in this episode, but I am glad the show took time to highlight how much they all love Qian and to show the audience that they want to protect Qian just as much as Qian wants to protect the rest of them.
All this to say San Pang and Lili work incredibly well together as a couple, and I’m so happy that we got to have this little moment between them, both to breathe a bit more life in to their relationship and to remind us all that Yuan is right. Lili is not as naive as she seems.
__
All gifs by the lovely, wonderful, marvelous @wanderlust-in-my-soul. THANK YOU SO MUCH YOU ARE THE BEST <3
#this scene is so important to me#I have been severely neglecting talking about Lili and San Pang and that sin ends today#unknown#unknown the series#unknown the series ep 11#unknown the series analysis#unknown the series meta#san pang#wei lili#xiao bao#san pang x wei lili#she loves her brother so much#she sees what he has done for her and for their family#she hoped to one day be big and strong enough to protect him#i was so close to crying about it y'all
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Secretary (Javier Peña x Reader)
summary: You graduated from university with dreams of becoming a DEA agent. One year before your graduation, a class trip took you to Colombia, where you met Javier Peña. The two of you quickly bonded over the six months you spent together, but after you left, he grew distant. When you return as a freshly minted DEA agent, you discover that you have not been hired as a DEA agent, but as a secretary.
words: 5.2k
this ff takes place in the late 1980s! (but you still can chat with him? yeah, doesn't make sense)
trigger warnings: 18+, MINORS DNI, age gap(reader in her 20s, Javier in his late 30s), explict language, mentioning of s3x in public, fluff, violence, smoking, being catcalled and harrased by a man, a little bit of angst (?), spoilers of narcos season 1 (?), one mention of y/n
a/n: sorry for taking a while for writing a new ff, but i thank you for over 500 likes on bad guy and also thank you so much for over 108 followers<3 this really keeps me motivated to write.
I also apologize if I mess up the plot of narcos and don't get everything right like it is in the series. English is not my first language and I'm not finished with the series yet. I just finished season 2 episode 3, and lord have mercy with this sex scene of pedro.
But please don't spoiler me in the comments what happens next in the series, thanks<3
And I guess I'll be making a little series out of this, when my creativity is working, what do you think?
i wish you a fun time reading:)
-------------------♡❀˖⁺. ༶ ⋆˙⊹❀♡--------------------
You are finally getting your mark on your uniform from your teacher. You stand there with a proud smile, looking into the crowd and seeing your parents.
You finally graduated from university to be a DEA agent.
Since you were a kid, your dream was always being a DEA agent, just like your dad. Your dad was stationed in Colombia, that’s why you didn’t see him that much, but when you came visiting him or he came home to Miami, he told you about his stories. He told you how he chased drug traffickers, went on missions and all the other stuff. As a kid, it just amazed you.
That’s why you began to train early for being an DEA agent. Since you were 5, you started solving riddles, like: ‘who stole grandma’s cat?’ and so on. When you got older, you loved solving murder, drug cases or already solved cases from your dad, which you had to solve again.
And it was pretty fun… and to be honest, you were god damn good.
That’s why after you finished high school with 19 years, you went to a DEA university. You were lying, if you're saying it wasn’t pretty hard… sometimes, when you were on your lowest, you even thought about quitting. But even if it was difficult, you didn’t want to throw away your dream, so, you kept going.
One year before your graduation, you went to Colombia with your class. You stayed there 6 months and of course your lessons continued there.
You visited the station where your dad was working and that was also the time where the hunt of Pablo Escobar started. And also, the time… well, where you met Javier Peña.
Every Sunday, you and your class were allowed to go to the station and were shown around, got told some stories and some tips how life works as a DEA agent. It was pretty interesting…
and who really made it interesting was Javi.
You and Javier got pretty close for the whole six months. You got friends… well maybe a little more than that…
Of course, you also met his partner Steve Murphy and you got along also, but just as friends.
You didn’t remember exactly how everything with Javier started, but in the first weeks you were going to the station, you and Javi always talked and you two just got along well. Sometimes he would steal you from the rest of the group to show you some more private folders, because he knew how interested you were in all of this… and also, to make out with you.
But expect of how good he kisses… or fucks.
He was there when you needed him.
Unfortunately, in the last month, your dad got injured when he was on a mission with Javier and Steve. Your dad got shot bad in a shooting and when you got the news, Javi was there to comfort you. Luckily, your dad did survive, but he was left incapable of working ever again.
Also, you didn’t ever know, what you and Javier really are. You know, he slept with a lot of women, mostly to gain information for work, but he also stopped sleeping with other women, for the whole six months when he was with you,
well, that’s what Steve told you.
But he never actually asked you if you would be his girlfriend or something… but neither did you.
One time when he showed your class around, the topic was the balance between work and personal life. He told everyone that he personally doesn’t do ‘relationships’ because of work and he isn’t interested in it, he finds it more exciting to get to know many women. And that’s what probably kept you from asking him because you were scared to get rejected.
Of course, you fell in love with him, but you thought he didn’t.
Also, your dad doesn’t know anything about what you and Javier had… and if he would have found out, he would probably fire Javier. Since his incident he was very protective over you and worried about you getting a DEA agent like him.
But nothing got in your way again, even if you were really not feeling great because Javi and you barley had contact after you left.
You kept going.
And now you're finally standing on the stage, proud with your mark on your uniform and even graduated as the class best.
At the evening you begin packing your suitcase for the flight to Colombia. You planned since the beginning of your studies, to go back to Colombia and work at the same station your dad did. You feel excited of the thought that your dream is finally going true. Also… how will it be meeting Javi again?
You sigh at the thought and suddenly your phone vibrates. You grab it and look on the display.
-
Javi
‘heard you graduated, congratulations, hermosa.
-
Your heart skips as he writes you that and you don’t notice how red your cheeks get. He didn’t write you often, nearly never, but when he did, he continued calling you hermosa, cariño,… and all the other names he had for you.
-
you
thanks, agent. maybe I’ll be your boss soon.
Javi
you wish. your dad told me to pick you up at the airport tomorrow.
-
You start to get a nervous feeling in your chest, but also can’t help to smile.
-
you
okay, looking forward for tomorrow then, agent.
Javi
see you tomorrow, cariño.
-
You throw your phone on your bed and lay down next to it. You can’t keep down your butterflies in your stomach. The thought of seeing him again after one year has you smiling, but also getting you even more nervous.
What should I say when he picks me up?
Should you hug him? What if he kisses me?!
God, I really need to know what to talk about, I hate awkward silence.
You think and start panicking. You groan in frustration into your pillow. You grab after your phone and scroll through your chats with Javi.
Your smile fades as you see your calls he didn’t pick up, how he responded to some messages from you after literally one month. Sometimes he didn’t even respond. You know, he has really much work to do and doesn’t have it easy… but seeing how he barley contacted you, makes you feel disappointed… you really thought he would like you back…
Maybe I have to high expectations, you think.
Maybe he doesn’t care so much about that, but you do. You gave him your trust in so many ways…
And with that thought, you get up with a sigh and look frustrated at your closet. You watch at some of your bikinis. “yeah, I think I’m going to take this one”, you mumble to yourself with a smirk, taking the string bikini in his favourite colour.
…
You walk towards the exit with your two suitcases and back bag. As you step out of the airport, you take in the warm, tropical breezes. You feel the air brushing across your skin and hair. The sun’s rays are warm and comforting as they peek through the clouds. You take a deep breath and close your eyes, taking a moment for yourself that you’re finally reaching your dream.
“bienvenido a casa, hermosa.”, you hear a very familiar voice saying and you wince.
“goddammit- you scared the shit out of me”, you say out of breath and then take a moment to look at him. He’s leaned against the car, with a cigarette between his fingers. Your feelings are going insane again. He’s still the same, just like when you left. But… he got a little more muscular.
“really? that’s how you act when we see each other after this long time?”, he chuckles and raises an eyebrow.
“shut up”, you mumble as you roll your eyes and walk towards him. You don’t think about it and just wrap your hands around his neck and pull him into a hug. You hug him tightly and you don’t know why, but your eyes start to get wet. Smelling his scent again of cigarettes, leather and musk… it’s addicting.
As you feel how he pulls you closer by wrapping his hands around your waist, your heart skips.
“missed me?”, he whispers and you sense his smirk. “maybe.”, you answer and even if you don’t want to, you end the hug and go some steps back to take your suitcases.
As you feel a wet drop rolling down your cheek, you immediately wipe the tear away and pull yourself together to give him a happy smile. “would you mind helping me with these?”, you point out your baggage.
Javi chuckles as he takes the last drag out of his cigarette until he throws it away and takes two of your suitcases, putting it into the trunk. “god woman-, how many clothes have you in these?”, he gasps and closes it.
“‘need something to dress, you know”, you chuckle and roll your eyes while going into the car. You expected him to say something like: “around me you won’t have to wear many clothes”, but… obviously he holds himself back.
You take a seat next to him and he starts the engine, drinking away from the parking lot. You roll down the window to let the warm breeze of Colombia fly against you. As you were driving through the city, you couldn’t help but just stare out of the window. “feels good to be here again”, you mumble and notice how much you missed this.
You expected him to say something like: “feels good to have you near me again”, but no… nothing.
After a while you finally hear his voice again. “class’s best huh?”, he chuckles and you roll your eyes. “yeah. my dad told you?, you ask and see him nod. “yeah”
“How’s the situation with Pablo? I watched the news, but they don’t tell much and you never know if they’re telling real shit.”, you ask while looking at all the buildings. You see kids play soccer outside and smile. “He’s a fucking pain in the ass, that’s what I can tell you”, Javier mumbles while concentrating on the road.
“You know, we’ll be working together now, you can tell me?”, you point out and raise your eyebrows.
“Let me say, the situation got worse. It’s true that he killed all these people by blowing up an airplane”, he answers and you gulp when you hear that. “There’s a fuckin’ war right in Colombia.”, he adds.
You see that he’s tense because of this topic. As you take a closer look at his face, you also notice he didn’t get proper sleep for like a whole month. “And… you’re fine?”, you mumble concerned.
“I’m fine, hermosa. Nothing to worry about.”, he answers and drives in the streets of Medellin. You remember now where you are. You see the streets you and your class walked down. You also remember that you will soon drive past an ice cream truck… and memories pop up in your mind.
…
Javier kidnapped you from a trip with your class through the streets of Medellin, again. You were walking down the road, he was right behind you and constantly staring at your ass, because you wore a shorts.
How couldn’t you? It was like 40 degrees in the middle of the day.
A heat wave was surrounding you and the sun was shining right into your face. “you’re not very unobtrusive when it comes to staring, you know.”, you smirk and take a quick look behind you.
“maybe I don’t want to be unobtrusive…”, he says while taking a drag from his cigarette. You roll your eyes at him. You just continue walking and hear a chuckle behind you as you rolled your eyes.
As you keep walking, you spot an ice cream truck. “You know, I really need to cool down now.”, you say and with that you just cross the street, walking towards the ice cream truck. “ice cream, really?”, you hear Javi saying behind you. “You want one too?”, you ask but he shakes his head to no in response.
“Hola señor, me gustaría una cucharada de vainilla y fresa en la oblea, por favor.”, you order in Spanish. You smile proud as the man in the truck understands you and gives you a smile. “Impressing.”, you hear Javier whispering right behind you what makes you laugh. Your Spanish wasn’t actually that bad, when you came to Colombia as a kid to visit your dad, you heard this language all around you. And in school you also had some Spanish lessons.
The man hands you over the ice cream and you hand him the money instead. “Gracias”, you say with a kind smile and then go on the crosswalk again. You and Peña walked to a shady spot, to give you two a break from the burning sun.
You start licking your ice cream from the bottom to the top. And, he was watching you.
He sees how you take long stripes of the ice cream, sometimes licking just the tip. Because of the hot Colombian sun, the ice cream begins to melt quickly.
Drops of ice cream land on your hot, light sweated neck, your thighs and your chin. Then, also on your tank top. “Fuck…,” you mumble and don’t notice how hard you’re making it for Javier. You take your finger, wipe the ice cream away and lick it off your finger.
“goddammit, y/n.”, you hear him cuss quietly, you look at him and notice the bulge on his jeans. “Ops.”, you say innocently and chuckle. You just continue licking your ice cream while looking directly into his eyes. You love teasing him… and always know where it leads you too.
It doesn’t take long to Javier grab your arm and drag you into a small alley. You let your ice cream fall, because of him. “Javi! My ice cream!”, you say literally heart broken like a kid and pout.
Suddenly you feel his tongue licking up the ice cream, which landed on your neck. “Javi, what are you-“, he cuts you off by smashing his lips onto yours. His tongue slips into your mouth, tasting the flavour of your ice cream.
Some minutes later, you find yourself being fucked from behind and pressed against the cold wall.
…
You don’t notice you’re pressing your tights together, but he does. “How about we get some ice cream? I really want to have ice cream now”, you ask with a slight smile on your face. You wanted to see if he remembered, if his body still responses to the memories of you.
And… it does.
He hesitates and wants to disagree. “Please...”, you beg and you know one thing, he can’t resist your begging… well, not for a long time.
You hear him let out a loud sigh, before whispering a quiet: “okay”.
Yup, still works, you think.
He pulls over and parks right next to the ice cream truck. And it’s really the same as one year ago.
You get out of the car and order yourself an ice cream, you feel him looking at you while you’re waiting. After you finally got your ice cream, you come back in the car and buckle up. You took the same flavours as last time. You take a long stripe of the ice cream and let out a soft satisfying moan.
God, how you missed this.
You hear Javier starting the engine quite impulsive and you can’t help but chuckle.
“So, where we’re going?”, you ask while licking your ice cream. “I’ll let you out at your dads old apartment. You can get yourself comfortable there and unpack your suitcases until I pick you up to drive to the station.”, he says tense but focussed on the road. You let out a cute short “okay” and just continued looking out of the window.
After thirty minutes, you arrive at the building where your dad’s old apartment was. You get out of the car and Javier opens the trunk, taking out your suitcases. As you wanted to take the suitcases, Javier has them already in his grip and getting them up the stairs.
“such a gentleman”, you tease and he opens the door of your building. “just get your ass up these stairs”, he says while rolling his eyes and you laugh.
As you two walked up some stairs, you finally arrived at your apartment. He gets out the keys your dad left for you and locks up the door. You walk through the door and immediately look around while Javier is getting your baggage inside. “It’s cute”, you say and walk to the front door, where he’s standing.
“There you go, cariño.”, he hands you over the keys, “‘gonna pick you up at 4, okay?”, you nod in response. “Thanks”, you say to him with a smile before he closes the door and you see him driving away.
You sigh and everything still feels pretty unrealistic. You go on your small balcony, feeling the hot sun burning in your skin. “I’m back, Colombia.”
You started unpacking your suitcase and made yourself comfortable. You took a shower, put a little make up on to cover the rings under your eyes and got yourself a dress. You’re wearing a white tank top with a shorts, since it’s still very hot outside. “I really need to go grocery shopping...”, you mumble when you’re looking in the empty fridge. You grab an apple out your bag pack and take a bite.
You look at the clock and it’s already 4 o’clock. You grab your cardigan, in case it gets colder in the evening and walk down the stairs, going out on the street and looking around for Javier. It doesn’t take long until you see a black Jeep Cherokee driving down the street.
Yeah, that’s him.
He pulls over and is leaned out of the window with a cigarette in his fingers. He’s wearing the same as in the morning, but now with yellow toned sunglasses.
God, he looks fucking hot.
“Ready?”, he asks while taking a drag of his cigarette. “always”, you reply with a smirk and get in the car. As he starts driving, you feel the excitement building up in you. The thought of you finally working and getting your place in a DEA station, makes your heart jump from happinesses. You worked your whole life for this.
You don’t live far away from the station and as Javier was parking, you saw Steve waiting outside. A big smile comes across your face. You two get out of the car and we’re walking towards the entrance.
“Hello, newbie”, Steve chuckles as he pulls you into a hug. “Shut up”, you roll your eyes and hug him back. “good to see you again”, he says as he lets go of you and you give him a smile. “good to see you too”, you reply and suddenly the door opens and Colonel Carrillo comes out.
You’ve seen him not often, just sometimes when your dad talked with him. “Buenos días, señorita Álvarez”, he says and offers his hand for a handshake. You give him a smile. “Colonel Carrillo.”, you nod and shake his hand, as Javi and Steve greet him too. ”also congratulations for graduating”, he says kind but with a stern face. “Follow me”, he says and walks into the station with you three following.
You squeak quietly because of excitement and your heart beats out of your chest. You walk through the hallway, and already seeing the office of the DEA agent, but instead of walking further, Carrillo opens the door to the secretary’s office.
“There you go”, he says and you just stand there confused. But not only you’re confused, you also feel Javier and Steve’s confusing look. “Um… that’s the secretary’s office”, you mumble and Carrillo nods. “Yeah.”, he says confidently. “I’m a DEA agent, sir.”, you point out, still completely confused.
“Oh, your father didn’t told you yet?”, you shake your head to no. “Your dad wanted you to watch first, to get some feeling for the job before working completely as a DEA agent. Also, the case with Pablo Escobar is kind of heavy.”, Carrillo continues explaining and you can’t believe what you’re hearing.
“What.”, you gasp slightly and feeling complete anger flowing through your whole body.
“‘being your boss soon’, huh?”, you hear Javi quoting your message with a chuckle. You find that anything but funny. “Shut the fuck up.”, you growl to him, and then force a smile to Carrillo.
“If you would excuse me for a minute, sir.”, you mumble tensely and get out of the office, walking out of the station and calling your dad. Murphy and Peña follow you outside, watching you walk up and down while holding your cellphone to your ear.
“poor girl.”, Steve sighs while leaning against the wall. “guess daddy is pretty scared for her”, he adds and Javi sighs while lighting up a cigarette, handing the lighter to Steve. “I mean, she isn’t bad… I think she would be a good help for us.”, Javi says while taking a drag of his cigarette while they watch you literally yell into your cellphone.
“Dad what the actual fuck?! You know how hard I worked for becoming an agent, and now you’re hiring me as the fucking secretary?”, you yell upset. “You’re not even working as the Colonel with Carrillo anymore, how can you still decide something like that!?”
“I wouldn’t want to get into an argument with her, that’s clear..”, Steve mumbles as he’s taking a drag of his cigarette too and looks over to Javi, who’s just watching you.
“You’re planning to fuck with her again?”, he asks and laughs slightly. “Shut up, Murphy”, Javi mumbles. “No I mean seriously… I know you like her, man”, Steve says while you’re still yelling into your phone, shortly before throwing it on the street.
“‘dunno… I didn’t reply to her calls, or texts often after she left…”, Javi sighs.
“Wow.”, Steve gasps as he finishes smoking. “You really are an asshole”, Steve points out and claps on his shoulder.
“but seriously, she likes you, Peña. Make it up to her ”, he says seriously while you’re on the edge to destroy your phone. “You really need a woman in your life, man”.
“Dad, I’m fucking 26! I can take care of myself”, they hear and see you scream.
Javi starts thinking about Steve words and finishes his cigarette too.
“she’s not gonna throw her phone, is she?”, Steve asks while raising his eyebrows as he keeps watching you how literally go rage. “If you think that, you don’t know her enough”, Javi just answers and one second later, you hang up and throw your cellphone directly throw it on the ground.
Steve just stays there in shock. “Told you”, Javi chuckles. As Steve sees how you walk towards them, he immediately makes his way into the station again. “‘need to do some paperwork”, he excuses and Javi rolls his eyes at him.
You take a deep breath and walk to Javi. “Well unfortunately my dad thinks I’m incapable of taking care and defending myself, even if I trained my whole fucking life for this.”, you complain and run your hand through your hair.
“'guess being class best and graduating after such a long time, isn’t enough.”, you sigh and try to calm down. Javi just keeps looking at you.
“I’ll talk to him”, he suddenly says and you look at him. “what? with my dad? that won’t help”, you scoff. “No, I mean with Colonel Carrillo. "I have a good rapport with him.”, he tells you and puts his hand into his pockets.
“If it doesn’t help, you can come over to us in secret, going through some folders and stuff”, he suggests and you nod slowly. “yeah…”, you just sigh. “thanks.. “, you add, turn around and take your phone with a pretty broken display from the ground.
“Would you mind driving me to the grocery store? I don’t have my car yet”, you ask after some minutes of silence. He takes a look at his watch. “Well, I have thirty minutes until my shift begins, if you do it quick, then I can drive y-”, he replies while still leaning against the wall. “good, thanks.”, you cut him off and make your way to his car.
…
You're leaned on the card and walk through the market. Your cart is already half full and you’re soon finished. Javi was walking behind you and the whole time his eyes were fixed on your ass, you could feel it.
And that’s why you couldn’t stop smirking. “Stop smirking so much, you’ll get wrinkles”, he chuckles and you make your way towards the checkout. “says the man who’s soon in his 40s”, you tease him back and he laughs.
How much you love his laugh…
When you walk to his car with him carrying your two full grocery bags, he takes a look at his watch again and you hear him cuss in Spanish. “I’m already ten minutes late..”, Javier hisses.
“Oh, I’ll walk the rest. My apartment is not far from here and I have to get my cellphone repaired anyway.”, you say, wanting to take the bags from his hands. “I won’t let you walk home alone on these streets, especially if it’s getting dark.”, he says serious, not handing you over the bags. “I can defend myself, it’s fine. Go to work”, you mumble more seriously and grab your bags, ripping them out of his grip.
“When something happens to you-“, you cut him off. “Go to work”, you shout and make your way on the other side of the street.
You hear him cuss in Spanish behind you and just chuckle. You changed in many ways after one year, but one thing always stayed the same.
Your obstinacy, confidence and trust in your skills.
“maybe if you hadn’t been busy with staring at my ass, you would’ve checked the time earlier.”, you shout with a cheeky smile to him as he goes into his car. You chuckle and hear him drive away.
You know when the whole case about Pablo Escobar wasn’t so serious, you know he would’ve driven you home, but unfortunately it was.
It was getting dark and you made your way to a electronic shop. After you talked with the man behind the counter, he told you, you can pick up your phone tomorrow.
When you got out of the store, it was dark outside and got kinda cold. You wanted to put on your cardigan, but notice that you forgot it in Javier’s car. “fuck..”, you mumble and continue walking with your grocery bags.
A group of men were walking next to you on the other side of the street, beginning to catcall you. You start to feel uncomfortable and walk a little quicker, ignoring them. They were continuing catcalling you, and being a woman, alone on a street while it’s fucking dark, is kind of scary.
But that’s life as a woman, I guess…, you think
But you pull yourself together and remind yourself of your confidence, knowing you would knock the fuck out of them. You were five minutes away from your apartment, but suddenly one of the men decided to switch sidewalks and walk to you.
“Buenas noches, hermosa. ¿Buscas alojamiento?”, he asks while walking next to you.
Someone else calling you hermosa, who’s not Javier, gives you the shivers.
Your Spanish wasn’t perfect, but you think he asked you if you have a place to sleep tonight or something.
You continued ignoring him, and he continues speaking to you, but now you didn’t understand shit… and to be honest, you didn’t want to understand it.
You could sense and smell he’s drunk. “Vete a la mierda”, you tell him to fuck off.
Suddenly he grabs your arm, and that was it. You let fall your grocery bags, grab his hand and kick him right into his balls. He couldn’t react fast enough because of the alcohol, so you also kicked him with your knee right into his face.
You hear a car coming nearer, but ignore it. As the guy lies on the ground, you punch him right in his face. You hear his mates being shocked. “You want too? Come here then!”, you shout challenging, but they didn’t thought twice and ran away.
You just scoff as you see them walking away and bending down to grab to pick up your groceries.
Suddenly, you feel a hand on your back. “Cariño, are you o-“, before your brain can process and recognise that it’s Javier’s voice, you punch him directly into his face. You hear him groan in pain and as you look up, you see his car. “Omg- I’m so sorry-“, you panic and take his hand into your face, looking at his bleeding nose. You take out a tissue of your shorts and hold it against his nose.
“I thought it was someone of these men-“, he cuts you off and takes the tissue himself. “You got a hell of a punch, you know that”, he says while holding the tissue at his nose.
A part of your brain starts thinking, he deserves it. For ignoring you for so long. You start to form s slight smirk on your lips, but then throw the thought away.
“What a secretary I am, huh?”, you chuckle and pick up your groceries. He stuffed the tissue into his nose and then helps you, getting all your groceries together and then lifting up your grocery bags.
“Don’t you have to work?”, you ask him confused because it was just 20 minutes ago when he left. “‘told Carrillo I forgot a folder at home, I can’t let a beautiful woman like you, walk home alone.”, he says while going to his car. “but I have to say, you handled the situation pretty well, he’s completely knocked out.”, he smirks and gets the grocery bags in his car.
As he called you beautiful, you blush slightly and take a seat in his car. “‘didn’t train for nothing, you know”, you giggle while he starts the engine and drives you home.
As you arrive after literally 2 minutes, you take your cardigan and get out of the car. “thank you for still looking for me”, you mumble and put the cardigan on.
“no problem… but I kind of deserved this punch, didn’t I?”, he sighs while you take your grocery bags.
Now you can’t hide your dirty smirk anymore.
“Yeah, you kind of did”, you answer and close his car door.
“‘wish you a good shift then, be careful”, you give him a smile and then walk to the building, getting out your keys. “see you tomorrow, hermosa”, he calls after you and as you walk through the door, you hear him drive off.
...
The next morning you finally got your car and could drive alone. Even if you enjoyed Javier’s as your driver. You get to the DEA station and walk to your office…
You see a sign with your name on your desk, and under it is written: secretary.
Yup, still hate that, you think and let out a loud sigh.
You take a seat on your chair and lean back. After a while some woman comes in and gives you some paperwork, and also a folder that you can catch up with everything. Even if the thought, that you normally could work in the DEA office to take down some of Pablo’s guys, makes you angry, you need to live with it for a while now. And then, you get started…
After some hours you hear a knock on your door. “Come in”, you say loud and as you look up who it is, you roll your eyes. “Agent Peña”, you call him while having the folder in the hand.
“‘The previous secretary was fired because being caught flirting, kissing and sleeping with one of the agents’”, you read out loud and then look up at him. “And who might that be huh?”, you ask serious while raising an eyebrow at him, knowing exactly who it probably was.
“Even if you won’t believe me now, it wasn’t me”, he answers and places a coffee on your desk. You raise your eyebrows at him. And he was right, you didn’t believe him.
But, why should you care? You’re not together or anything… but the thought of him fucking another women, makes you jealous… and kinda sad.
“you’re fucking all your secretaries now, Agent Peña?”, you ask cheeky while being leaned back in your chair. He just chuckles while shaking his head and places his hands on your desk, leaning against it.
“No, just you.”, he answers and you choke on your coffee because you took a sip.
“We’re definitely not fucking and I’m not your secretary.”, you say serious to make a point.
He takes a cigarette from his ear into his fingers and puts it between his lips, while making his way out of your office.
“Yeah, we’ll see about that in some weeks.”
#pedro pascal#pedro pascal x reader#ff#oneshot#pedro pascal fic#pedro x reader#pedro pascal fanfiction#smut#narcos#Javier peña#javier peña x reader#javier pena x reader#javier pena fanfiction#narcos fic#javier pena x you#javi p#narcos fanfic#reader#javi x reader#pedro pascal characters#fluff#narcos fluff#pedro pascal fluff#pedro pascal x you#pedro pascal x female reader#pedro pascal imagine#Joel Miller#Joel X Reader#tlou#tlou fans
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a litte headcanon i thought a few munites ago
sonic is the ulitmate photobomber, there has been millions of photos across the planet with blue streak behind them and there no way to plan for it, he is fast enough to pose for the picture and be gone before you even turn around, there a ton of then
Imagine Sonic and eggman beating the life outta of each other in background of your family photo
he will never apologize for this
Vdrgghghbghb YES! This is so real I love this headcanon
I think I made a HC like this one with Sonic Wachowski in some other post but yes Love me Sonic who photobombs every picture
Remember that Sonic X episode where Sam challenged him to a race and it appeared to be a tie so they checked the slowed recording frame by frame? Yeah, he does stuff like that on the regular. This is what happens when a silly teenager who loves having fun is given super speed
He'll infiltrate Eggman's base and make faces at every security camera while running past them. They're a little secret 'gift' if Eggman or Metal ever reviews any footage
He'll be like a little cryptid ghost urban legend in places where he never frequents but shows up in the group photos of teams like them unsolved mystery pics where a person who's supposed to be dead is in picture taken after their death kinda deal but like, more cool than scary.
What is Sonic the hedgehog doing at our wedding? Why is he amongst the graduates? Etc. Most of the people don't mind getting photo bombed by Sonic, they are instead excited.
The people who'd actually be most annoyed are his closest friends because his bombs in such pictures are so hilarious and half the time his expressions are those of a little menace enjoying causing them misery. (He's reclining over the Master Emerald in the picture Knuckles had asked Tails to be taken for commemoration and record. He's grinning evilly from behind with mints in hand as Tails captured some images for his video's thumbnails. He's blowing a raspberry at Abraham Tower in the official picture of Team Dark receiving some award. He's playing dead in the background of his friends' selfies, he's moonwalking on Tails' live stream and disappears before Tails reaches the lounge, he teams up with Charmy to ruin Espio's timer photos of cool ninja poses, he shows up in one of the images of Amy's picnic with half the deserts gone and stuffed mouth while giving a deer in headlights look at the camera, she turns around after checking the photo and nothing is there but half the deserts are gone. )
#Sonic my silly SILLY son i love him#sonic the hedgehog#sonic#sth#sonic headcanons#ask answered#cosmo-production#miles tails prower#knuckles the echidna#team dark#g.u.n.#amy rose#team chaotix#espio the chameleon#charmy bee#dr eggman#abraham tower
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safe haven (how much longer do we have?) ➵ kim taerae
kim taerae x reader, slight sung hanbin x reader
you can only hope for more tomorrows with taerae.
genre/warnings ➵ strangers to lovers, heavy angst with a happy ending, touch of fluff, afab reader (no gendered terms), lowercase intended, apocalypse au, hurt/comfort (both physical and emotional), depictions of grief, descriptions of gore/blood, use of guns, allusions and discussions of suicide, minor character deaths, hanbin is your ex, zhanghao and matthew appearance :’), elements of the last of us (don’t support neil druckmann!), mostly written in past tense (because u’re remembering!)
word count ➵ 6.2k words
inspired by ➵ “anaheim” by niki, “are you happy?” by wavesmp3, “love wins all” by iu, episode three of hbo’s the last of us, and “you’re gonna carry that weight” quote from cowboy bebop
a/n ➵ thought i'd make my official debut to zeroseblr with this lil piece that i absolutely love!! i hope you guys look forward to more zb1 fics from me :DD here's the original one if you're interested! if you enjoyed reading, please do reblog and leave feedback!
want to be part of my taglist? send me an ask!
masterlist
time was the one thing that occupied everyone’s minds. it held value, something that shouldn’t be wasted, and people revolved their lives around it.
questions flew around with every tick and tock—what day is it today? when’s your next doctor’s appointment? how long has it been since you’ve last seen your friends from high school? until when does this meeting last?
as the hands of the clock continue to rotate, the calendar pages would flip along. birthdays were celebrated with every revolution as candles on cakes were lit up, awaiting the puff of celebrants as they wished for their desires. holidays were ones to look forward to; people dressed up to celebrate periods of the year that mattered to them while others slept in until noon. and days were spent counting down until graduations, where caps with tassels would fly to the expanse of blue and orange as cheers and sobs sound throughout.
but now, no one keeps track of time. clocks stopped moving and calendars weren’t produced annually. once the surge of the infected took over, grabbing on humans, taking them away from the lives they’ve lived, everyone ran like they were running out of time. with every second that passes, people are ridden with possibilities of how they might bid farewell to life itself—would it be through the hands of the infected or their own?
now, only one question echoes within their minds: how long do we have?
yet, the clock continues—tick, tock, tick, tock. it keeps going, and going, and going, like how everyone expects it. while everyone seemed to let time go, you still kept track of it all: birthdays, holidays, a graduation you never had.
the outbreak hit two years ago on the day of hanbin’s graduation. cheers turned into screams. white togas and diplomas were splattered with red. the lively became lifeless.
you remember hanbin’s hand in yours, fingers gripping you as if you were his life, as you charged out of the gymnasium, legs keeping up with the speed of his. you darted off to nowhere as images of the infected tearing people apart took up every block, all the way from skin to bone.
and while it was a rush of tragedies, hanbin was the only hope you had.
“keep your eyes on me,” he glanced at you, eyes off the path as he met your gaze. “don’t look at them. only look at me.”
it was impossible to ignore the wails that filled your ears, but you would repeat his words—his soft-spoken voice—to drown them out.
by nightfall, you and hanbin found yourselves in a motel room, skin cleaned from blood splatters and dressed in clothes that engulfed your figures, and in each other’s arms on a twin-sized bed. the duvet that wrapped around you two is thin, not at all keeping you warm for the night, but the warmth of hanbin was enough to provide you a sense of security—stability amidst the ever-changing world.
he whispered into the crown of your head, words meant to dispel your fears, all while you sobbed into his shirt. there was nothing that he could do but stay strong for you.
and for a few days, that room acted as your safe haven. the time spent within those four walls is the life you imagined your future with hanbin. it would’ve been in a two-story house with a garden where a singular orange tree stands, lounging on the couch as you played movies to fall asleep to, but all you had was an old room with a carpeted floor with unrecognizable stains and a bathroom unable to fit two.
yet, you would choose this over anything. even if it meant eating instant noodles for every meal or sleeping on a mattress that ruins your backs, you would choose this if it meant hanbin would be with you.
still, time continues to move. hanbin knew that you both couldn’t stay in that room or else the infected may reach you. so when you both went to bed on that last night, you outlined his features from the space between his eyebrows all the way to his lips, and you spent that time memorizing his warmth to carry with you for the rest of your life. you could only hope that he stays with you until the end.
after a month passed, you and hanbin met zhanghao, an injured boy who only wanted to live. at first, hanbin was hesitant to take the stranger in, but you wouldn’t allow yourself to live with the idea of abandoning someone in need. in a world where the infected have taken over, it only seemed right to help out others, save them from a fate they’re not ready to meet.
what started off as a pair turned into a trio. you’ve learned more about what it takes to survive in this life. long gone is the need for money to buy necessities; you need to scavenge if you want to live in an infected-ridden world. thanks to zhanghao, you and hanbin got to learn about how to find supplies in every building that you pass on the journey.
but it’s not enough to know where to find food and bullets. hanbin decided that it was only right to teach you how to use a gun. with every morning that came, you two spent hours learning how to hold, reload, and fire.
“don’t worry,” he told you as his chin hovered over your shoulder. you both stared at the tin can situated on a stack of boxes only a few meters away. “you won’t have to worry about fighting alone. i’ll be here with you.” as you exhaled, your eyes zeroed in on the target. “now, shoot.”
six months have passed, and you were happy that you were still a trio. zhanghao became your best friend over that time. his laughs were enough to shine glimmers of hope onto you. you were glad that you decided to help him off the ground and tend his bullet wound that day.
until you found yourselves retreating from the horde of infected.
time moves at a constant speed but it can become swift if it decides to. when you and zhanghao reached the doors leading to safety, you remember seeing hanbin fighting off those who were once like you, bullets firing at their heads. you remember your screams, telling him to run to you—go to where it’s safe—so that you can keep having tomorrows with him.
yet, hanbin glanced at zhanghao, nodding at him before his eyes met yours. you watched how his mouth moved, a soundless three-word phrase leaving him before the doors shut before you. you would’ve pried them open but zhanghao kept his arms around you, holding you back. from letting the infected reach you. from letting hanbin come back to you.
the wails that left you are enough to attract the infected. if only the infected were to burst through the doors, grab onto you and bring you to hanbin, then maybe you would stop crying. yet, zhanghao dragged you away. you never saw him as your best friend after that.
a month passed, and you still refused to talk to him. the boy tried to strike up a conversation with you, trying to earn your laugh like he used to, but he was only met with a cold shoulder. with every brick he put, you smashed your sledgehammer against it, dispelling any hope he had in rekindling his friendship with you.
the two of you learned to live in silence, fighting for survival while dealing with the loss of the one who would always bring you both to safety.
until you came across another boy who pointed his gun toward you. his defensive demeanor reminded you of hanbin, and you wondered if this was his doing—his reincarnation. but before he could pull the trigger, zhanghao saved you from meeting your fate.
somehow, the duo had turned into a trio once more. you still refused to talk to zhanghao, but would eavesdrop on the conversations he shared with the stranger. you learned that the new addition is named taerae.
but even the stranger wasn’t enough to fill the void that hanbin left. with every nightfall, when the soft snores of the two boys filled your ears, tears streamed down your face as sobs threatened to spill out of your mouth. the palm of your hand wasn’t enough to muffle your weeps. behind your eyelids, hanbin’s last words to you play on repeat. the ones he failed to say. the ones you’ll never hear again.
maybe if you didn’t leave that motel room then he would’ve still been with you, arms finding their place around your waist as he trails kisses all over you. if the outbreak didn’t happen, then maybe you would be living in that two-story house with him. maybe you would wake up to a glass of freshly squeezed orange juice by the bedside table and the warmth of his lips on your forehead. and maybe you could finally tell him yes before he slips the silver band on your finger—you could’ve grown with him until your hair turns grey.
the weight you carry never got lighter with time. the void continued to consume you whole with the goal of ripping you apart. as another month passed, another life was lost—not to the infected but to the raiders.
“hao, you have to stay with me.” those were the first words you told him since hanbin’s death. crimson continued to spill out of his abdomen through the gaps between your fingertips in the same way tears flow out. “taerae! find gauze, betadine, anything!” you never glanced at the stranger, keeping your gaze on your best friend whose eyes continued to droop.
still, zhanghao caressed your face, thumb wiping teardrops. as he slowly entered territories that you both knew he would never escape, he grinned at you one last time. “i missed hearing you. i’m glad you’ll be the last thing i hear.”
but you tried to tell him that you couldn’t be the last voice he heard. it should’ve been with someone he can imagine his future with, maybe in a two-story house or a cramped flat in an apartment complex. he deserves more tomorrows in the same way hanbin did.
but time continues to move. it took him away from you in a matter of minutes, slithering away without a second thought and no regard for the value of life, and all you were left with was his temple—still. lifeless. as you sobbed into his shirt, still holding the wound, the warmth of taerae’s hand stayed on your back, moving along with your wails.
now, you carry the loss of two. it never got easier with time.
taerae still sticks with you. it only seemed right. stay strong in numbers as you wander off to nowhere, grasping at the loose ends of survival.
two weeks have passed. you and taerae got used to the new dynamic; while he went hunting and you were tasked with scavenging, you both played your roles in combat, ready for any raid or horde. when night came, you both took shifts, keeping watch while the other got some shut-eye.
until that one evening.
you recall the sounds of wood crackling from the fire. it stood strong against the breeze—burning, shining—surrounded by greens that latch on browns. hues of amber cascaded over your skin, painting you with warmth—it’ll never compare to the one you craved. your eyes drifted to taerae who sat across from you, his eyes trained on the fire as he rubbed his palms together. perhaps he craved the same type of warmth you longed for.
“we used to be three.” his eyes snapped towards yours. “before you came, we used to be three—zhanghao, me, and—” it rose in you like bile, wanting to escape but never leaving. “we were three then.”
you glanced at the fire that continued to burn. “we met zhanghao a month after the outbreak, spent six months together until—” the claws of the void struck against your throat, holding you back from sharing with the stranger what your life was before he came. while you never found the right words to say, taerae never pushed, letting you say what you wanted to share while filling in the blanks on his own.
“i resented zhanghao after what happened.” you moved your gaze to taerae whose eyes never left you. “refused to talk to him. refused to forgive.” and you remember how you hesitated, taking a deep breath in before sputtering out the next sentence. “refused to accept.”
nine months ago, the outbreak didn’t happen. nine months ago, you were attending hanbin’s graduation. nine months ago, you two were imagining your tomorrows—together, for eternity.
and those nine months fractured all hopes and dreams; the glass is now littered with cracks, ready to burst into shards.
“but i think about the last time we saw zhanghao,” the image of him sitting in front of you all frail, treading the line between life and death, flashed in front of you; it’s quick but strong to remind you of what’s lost. “and i wish i could’ve learned how to forgive during those two months.”
but it was an impossible request. how could you ever forgive a boy you’ve known for only six months for taking your future away? how could you forgive a world that took him away? how could you forgive and live?
and still, you did.
you left it at that. they were enough. so when you told taerae that you’ll take over tonight’s shift, he never asked to hear more. instead, he laid near the campfire as you keep an eye out.
and once enough hours have passed, you allowed yourself to sob like other nights. the breeze that passed through branches reminded you of zhanghao; rustling leaves imitated the giggles of the boy you’ve only known during the apocalypse.
the wind that grazed against your skin should’ve been a nuisance, but the warmth of the fire wrapped you up like the duvet in that motel room. and you don’t complain—it’s the only part of hanbin you have left.
the heat was enough to last you the night, but the chill of reality sent you back to the void.
that night, taerae listened to your sobs. not one of you got enough rest for the journey.
another two weeks went by. you two got into a better groove of the routine; instead of hunting and scavenging in silence, you and taerae found yourselves talking more about your lives before the outbreak. you learned that he’s only a year younger than hanbin, and he shared that he had plans to pursue music.
“if the world finds a cure to this mess, you have to promise me that you’ll get me front-row tickets to your first show.” it was a joke. in what world could there be a cure for the infected? but the wishful thinking of what could be—what could’ve been—is all you had left.
still, taerae promised you that.
that night, you two stayed in the living room of an abandoned house. instead of lighting the fireplace, candles were placed on the coffee table. they shined in the middle of you two, you who stayed on the couch and taerae who sat on the mattress lying on the floor.
“where were you?” his eyes met yours. “on the day of the outbreak, i mean.”
he leaned back, hands resting on the mattress before he looked once more at the wax that continued to melt. “i was there for my upperclassmen’s graduation.” it hit you like a sudden downpour on a sunny day. “i knew the people in the music program and we were going to celebrate after. until the infected came.”
and when you said the name of the university, his gaze met yours as his shoulders stiffened. “m—my hanbin.” it’s the first time you spoke of his name, and the sight of taerae’s eyes widening over it was enough to speak for himself.
“i—i didn’t know,” he whispered, but his words were loud enough to shatter glass. “i only spoke to him a few times. he spoke of you with so much love.”
your heart skipped beats; it should’ve been enough to send you off into the same territories where hanbin and zhanghao now stay. your mouth turned dry as taerae’s voice morphed into radio silence.
before you knew it, the two of you left the information to hang in the air as you tried to drift into slumber. the clock continues to tick. minutes turned into hours; time moves like it usually does once more.
yet, you were stuck in the same gymnasium, fixing hanbin’s toga as you scolded him about how wrinkled it’s become—hey! you’ll go up on stage soon. we can’t take pictures of you like this. despite your words, he smiled at you before grazing his lips on your temple—his silent way of telling you the three-word phrase.
in a split second, you were off the couch. you barged out of the house, clutching your chest as the knot constricted your throat, and your feet dragged you off to nowhere. every sound has turned into a buzz—only the voice of hanbin being the one clear thing amidst the hysteria.
before you knew it, you stood before a horizon of green. it takes only one step into the woods, alone with no protection, for you to meet your demise. you would’ve charged into it in the same way you would’ve charged out to save hanbin that day.
all it takes is one step, and—
“what are you doing?!” a pair of hands gripped your shoulders, spinning you around until you were face-to-face with the last form of life that you know of. his breaths were short as his fingers dug into your arms. “you can’t just rush out in the middle of the night! i woke up worried sick.” his eyebrows knitted in frustration. confusion. distress.
the voice was caught in your throat. how does one begin to unpack the baggage they’ve learned to carry? when the items they bring are revolting, rotten, repugnant, how does someone not feel shame about showing all the tattered-up objects?
how do you learn to open up to someone you’ve only known for three months?
your hands trembled; you’ve carried the weight of it all for too long.
in that split second, your nose met the juncture between his chin and shoulder. the material of his shirt against your cheek allowed you to bathe in what you miss—the hand of zhanghao that once caressed your face. the lips of hanbin that lingered with every kiss. all the moments that you hoped time would freeze just for you lives in the boy you stick with for survival.
all it took were taerae’s hands to rest on the lower side of your back for the tears to begin their stream. the sobs spill out. for once, they weren’t muffled like those other nights. they sounded throughout the space that surrounded you two. you allowed yourself to drop the baggage only for a few minutes.
taerae took you back to the house that night, allowing you to sob about all that you’ve kept under the wraps. when sunrise came, you found your legs mixed with his as his arms remained wrapped around you, and your ear pressed against his chest. the sound of his breathing is the one reminder of what a safe haven is.
half a year went by. taerae still stays by your side. the baggage got lighter.
it should’ve been the same routine; taerae goes off to hunt while you scavenge, and you’ll take turns on the night shifts. but that night shifted something between you two—stolen glances, quiet giggles, linked fingers.
two months have gone by. the moon shined through the trees, their shadows cascading on an abandoned cabin that you and taerae decided to stay in for that night.
it should’ve been the same set-up as other nights spent in abandoned houses; you’ll sleep on the couch while he sleeps on a dragged-out mattress. instead, he sat with you, your back resting on his chest along with his hand staying on your arm.
a lit candle rested on the table; its amber tones painted the taerae’s skin—close to the fruit tree that stands in your lost future.
“what would you do if there is a cure to this?” you watched how his fingers danced across your skin, calloused from plucking guitar strings or wielding a gun.
taerae’s chest rumbled against your back as he hummed. “what would you do?”
a giggle left as you looked at the boy. “i was the one who asked you first!”
he shot you a grin as his hand slipped into yours. the candle continued to burn; it did a poor job of giving you light and warmth that night. but he did it all—one smile. one exhale. one indication to show that he lives.
“travel, maybe? or i’ll go back to writing music.” you nodded at his plans before looking back at the light source. “what about you?”
“i don’t know.”
there was no point in going back to university after such a catastrophe. if anything, the year spent surrounded by the infected, fighting for survival, has shown you that there’s more to life than the perpetual cycle of working a nine-to-five.
so…
“i would settle down if i could.” the wax continued to melt. “i think i’ve seen enough of the world. for once, i just want to stay home, indulge in my hobbies, live the life that i want.”
his breath grazed the top of your head. “with someone?” and suddenly, you became aware of it all—the heat that emitted from his palm, the movement of his chest against your back, the gravity of his question.
the words get caught in your throat. your heartbeat rang in your ears. for the first time since hanbin’s death, you considered it.
“with someone.”
before you knew it, his hand caressed your cheek. you were forced to meet his eyes which glistened with devotion. he leaned forward, his breath grazing your skin while you held in yours. you didn’t miss how his gaze flickered to your lips before he met your eyes once more.
then, he held back. it’s a choice, one only you can make. but when your eyes shut, it’s a quiet plea—a silent yes.
his lips met yours.
the warmth that blossomed in your chest wasn’t like the one in that motel room. not like the embrace of the one you’ve lost. it was one of all seasons—changing with the weather, bringing comfort throughout the everchanging times.
it’s a perpetual cycle of fighting for survival. you’ll endure through it all.
a month passed by, and you came across another boy on the journey. he’s named matthew, and he told you of a safe haven located in the town that you and taerae grew up in.
for a moment, it was an internal debate—should you go back to where the downfall started? can you go to where the memory of hanbin still lives?
but one glance at taerae was enough to settle it. the three of you embarked on your journey.
you remember that day. it was a walk with the goal of finding a car to make the journey back an easy one. the heat of the sun prickled against your skin, but you still kept your arms crossed.
“are you two together?” matthew asked, causing you to whip your head towards him. your eyes met taerae’s for a split second—confusion, dejection—before they landed back at the stranger who kept his eyes on the path you took.
“no, we aren’t.”
for the rest of the journey, it was quiet.
sundown came, and you found yourselves in a convenience store for that night’s shelter. taerae was in charge of taking the night shift, allowing you and matthew to rest up. when the stranger went off to sleep on the makeshift bed, you were left alone with taerae.
you watched how he cleaned his gun with a rag stained with dark splotches. the moon gleamed through the window—it cannot compare to how taerae shines.
you needed to get some sleep, is what you tell yourself. with one spin, you were about to make your way to where you’d sleep for that night.
“are we really not?” you halted in your tracks. you couldn’t look at him. “did it mean nothing?”
not a single answer left your mouth. your eyes remained straightforward, refusing to meet his gaze.
the warmth vanished with a lack of an answer. instead, it was replaced once more with the cold—the void—that attempted to consume you whole.
and when a scornful chuckle left taerae, you knew that you’d burnt the bridge. you walked away, leaving him to do his job, bidding farewell to the closest form of a safe haven.
two weeks went by and another goodbye had to be done. matthew stood in front of you two, a grin on his lips while tears streamed down his face. his arm was out, revealing a bite mark. the veins near the wound had already turned black. he would’ve turned in a few hours.
“go out.” those were taerae’s first words to you since that night in the convenience store.
you remember the last thing you told matthew before you left the room—you’ll get to your safe haven. the sobs that spilled out of him are ones you’ll never forget. and when you shut the door behind you, it took 20 seconds until you heard a gunshot.
the weight got heavier once more.
another two weeks went by, and you and taerae found yourselves standing in front of the remains of a safe haven. the fences were torn down. streaks of dark red littered over pavements. not a single sight of a soul lived.
still, you two trudged your way through the town, all the way until you reached taerae’s house. like others, his was abandoned. the cream walls were littered with red strokes and vines. when you both entered, you didn’t miss how taerae’s eyes lingered on a photo hung on the wall—a picture of him, his sister, and his parents.
you gave him all the time he needed to explore, to sit with the mess, while you stayed in the living room. as you sat on the couch that had gathered dust, you caught sight of a bowl of plastic produce that rested on the coffee table. it held a variety of fruits whose paint had chipped: watermelon, chestnut, and fig.
but amidst the crowd of old, torn-down, plastic fruits, a strawberry and an orange leaned against each other as grime collected on them. once your hands reached out to the fruits, you pulled them apart—a mess of red and orange stained the two.
he came back to you in 30 minutes, eyes glistening with tears. yet, he only gave you a nod, and you two went to another house.
you then stood in front of your old house with taerae by your side. weeds grew in the front yard, and the wooden exterior has turned a few shades darker. silence settled between you two.
to be back in a place you grew up in, where all your memories live, is a process—a grieving one. being face-to-face with the damage brought by the infected can only remind you of what you had and could’ve had.
and once you made your way to your childhood room, you were reminded of all your hopes and dreams before the outbreak. dust rested on top of books. the laptop on your desk had no charge. potted plants have withered.
when you approached the picture frames found on your table, your hand darted out to a photograph of you and hanbin. there was no occasion when that picture was taken—the fact that you two were together was enough for it to be remembered. memorialized.
as you made your way back down the stairs, you saw taerae crouched in front of the console table with eyes trained on photographs. “was this your high school graduation?” you approached him and saw the picture he was referring to, you who stood beside hanbin with a big grin as his lips were on your temple.
“yeah,” you said as you crouched beside taerae. “we knew each other back when i was a freshman.” your fingers trailed on the wooden frame, gathering the dust before flicking it away. despite your efforts, it was still covered in grime, but you didn’t mind.
“and you stayed together since?” all you did was hum. “did you find anything up there?”
for the first time since you entered your old house, you looked at taerae and he met your gaze. your eyes trailed his features. the eyes that speak of a thousand words. the lips that once kissed yours.
and it hit you like the gunshot that filled your ears, the breeze that rustled the leaves that one night, the doors that shut close. it was 20 months since the outbreak happened, 13 months since you lost hanbin, and 11 months since zhanghao told you his last words—but it was also 13 months spent with taerae, choosing to survive with him.
“yeah.”
you found a lot of things within those four walls. there were books you once read growing up, stuffed toys you slept with, and the one picture of you and hanbin; they’re the remaining pieces you have left of a life that was good.
you would’ve kept it all, rebuilt the life that was ripped away by the hands of the infected—
“but nothing to hold on to.”
they’re memories, ones you’ll carry with you, but ones worth moving on from.
“oh,” he said as his eyes still held your gaze. “okay.”
and with one exhale, you said, “let’s rebuild it, just a place for us two.”
it was a whirlwind of emotions in taerae’s eyes, ones you can’t identify. for a moment, you thought he’d say no. maybe he decided that 13 months was enough. one more day with you would be too much, and—
“okay.” when his hand reached out for yours, linking fingers with you like all other times, you gave him a small smile.
when you and taerae stood up, you made your way out of the house, off to find a place just for you two—a safe haven to last you many tomorrows with him.
a month passed. the safe haven was rebuilt; the fences stood strong with electrical wires and barbed wires, and the town was cleaned of all remnants of grime and blood. the two of you took up different tasks ranging from cleaning, cooking, building, and maintaining the haven.
but while you were okay with a knife, accidents did happen. “fuck!”
“what happened?” you remember how taerae came rushing in, only to see you pressing on the skin around the cut on your finger.
before you knew it, you were sitting down with him as he wrapped gauze around the wound. “taerae, it’s just a cut. i’ll be fine.”
“still, i don’t want you getting hurt.” you watched how his eyes were focused on treating your finger. “i’ll be in charge of cooking now.”
you shook your head. “no, i like to cook. i want to cook for us.” his gaze then met yours, his filled with worry while yours filled with determination. they flickered back to your finger, and his hands busied themselves with covering it up.
once he was done, his hand continued to hold yours. you remember the heat of his thumb as it drew patterns on your hand. he’s etched himself onto you.
his eyes met yours once more, and he said, “okay, just let me help out.” all you gave him was a nod.
another month went by, and you woke up to the sound of gunshots. you remember how hazy your vision was that night, fresh from sleep but panic coursing through your veins. and when you looked beside you to only see an empty spot, you didn’t think twice about rushing out of bed.
when you exited the house, you saw taerae holding his gun, firing at the people who attempted to tear down the haven’s fences. “taerae!” when he looked back at you, you caught sight of the crimson that poured out of his abdomen.
another gunshot was fired, grazing taerae’s leg, and he fell to his knees. you ran to him, reaching out to rest your hand on the wound as you began to sob. “fuck! you have to stay with me.” with his arm resting around your shoulders, you dragged him back to the house.
you set him on the table and moved his hand to hold where he was shot. “hold it.” you rushed to where the medical supplies were stored and gathered whatever you could hold. when you got back, you saw how blood continued to spill out.
you got to work, focused on trying to patch him up. making sure he stays. “you can’t go. i won’t let it happen.” and while your hands busied themselves with treating the injury, you remember how taerae’s hand caressed your cheek, thumb wiping away the spilled tears.
“in the basement, there’s a piece of paper that has all the codes. if you ever—”
“no, you’ll be okay.”
still, he continued to talk. “if you ever forget the codes, you can always look at the paper. don’t forget that you need to always check the water system every two days, and—”
“taerae!” you croaked out his name in between sobs. “you’ll be okay. you have to, okay?” the more he went on about what to keep in mind, the baggage got heavier. “i can’t do this without you. i won’t allow it.”
because 15 months ago, you would’ve bid farewell to the mayhem. 13 months ago, you hoped for time to drag you away. 12 months ago, you would’ve walked into the forest. but it’s been 22 months, and you were still walking on this earth, choosing to live amidst the chaos—so long as taerae was with you.
and when you leaned your forehead on his, eyes closed, you felt his breath graze against your lips. “i need you.”
all it took were three words from you. “okay.”
it’s been two months since that happened. the safe haven was rebuilt once more. you and taerae fortified the defense system, hoping they’ll be enough to keep any infected and raiders out. all that matters is that you two were protected—safe—from the chaos.
now, you sit on a couch as you flip through the pages of a book you didn’t have time to read before the outbreak. when all responsibilities vanished, you were able to find enough time to do things you couldn’t do then.
you were ready to get yourself sucked into the world of the novel, but taerae came into the living room with his hands behind his back and a small smile on his lips. “do you remember what you made me promise you before?”
you frown at him, confused, until he shows you an acoustic guitar. “oh my god, you found one?” you put the book on the coffee table.
he takes a seat beside you, body facing towards you as he rests the instrument on his lap. “here, front-row tickets to my first show.” you almost laughed because this is no stadium or club, but a home—one you built with him.
it takes only one smile from him for you to hold it back.
“any song requests?” he strums on the guitar strings, perfectly in tune. it’s almost as if he tuned it before coming to you.
a hum leaves you as you rest your head on your hand propped on the couch. “whatever you want to show me.”
it takes him a few seconds, fingers fiddling with the strings, until he figures out what to play. when he sings out the words—dearest, darling, my universe—you melt like the candles you lit up those nights. as he continues to play a song of a world in hysteria but a love that endures, that’s when you realize what you’ve had all this time.
time is the one thing that occupies your mind. it holds value, something that shouldn’t be wasted, and you learned to revolve your life around it.
it takes you two years to figure out that life doesn’t end after the outbreak—and 17 months to realize that your safe haven is not a two-story house with an orange tree in the garden but the boy in front of you.
when you lean closer to him, his fingers falter, messing up the chords. your hand reaches out to caress his face as your eyes flicker to his lips. you don’t miss how taerae holds his breath, how he stops playing the guitar, how his eyes look back at yours—it’s a slurry of warmth, tenderness.
“i love you.”
all it took was a three-word phrase from you for him to close the distance.
the warmth that spreads within you is like the one you experience in the abandoned cabin. but now, you’re full of hope—a reason to stay—in an infected-ridden world.
now, only one question echoes within your mind: how much longer do we have?
an eternity is what you hope.
taglist ➵ @kflixnet @blankjournal
#works of moni#kflixnet#bjnet#k-labels#zerobaseone#zb1#zb1 x reader#kim taerae#zb1 imagines#kim taerae imagines#zb1 angst#kim taerae angst#zb1 fluff#kim taerae fluff#sung hanbin#sung habin fluff#sung hanbin angst#sung hanbin x reader#sung hanbin imagines
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Imagine you are Hayden Christensen's closest friend from college and you help him going through his divorce. Will friendship be enough for either of you? Based on the request made by @calzone-d ...
Warnings: *long post*, drama, explicit smut, fluffy endings.
Recommendations: "Summertime Sadness", "Ride", by Lana Del Rey; “Scared to be Lonely” by Dua Lipa; “Here with me”, by the Killers; “Always” by Gavin James.
***
How it started...
You were 19 years old when you finally got the chance to study cinema at Y/C's university. An old dream you had, to be able to transmit onscreen all your ideas. Your family encouraged you to pursuit the academy of arts in order to become an actress, but you thought yourself too introspective to act.
Well, here you were when you met him. The one who was destined to remain a principal figure in your life over the years. Taking acting classes--well, you did need to study it anyway--you bumped into Hayden Christensen.
"Excuse me", he said to you, a little out of breath.."Is this the acting class with Miss H/N? I fear I am slightly late..."
You remembered finding his blue eyes the handsomest pair of eyes you ever came across with: they were intense, secretive, but friendly too, somewhat emotional. You were instantly captivated.
"Yes, it is. And you are not in the slightest late, young man, but /very/ late indeed. Come in, take your seat, I'll have you updated..."
He gives you a long gaze, relieved for being saved from a bigger trouble—and you can tell he is a freshman like you.
“My name is Y/N”, you side smirk at him.
“Nice to meet you, Y/N. I am Hayden.”
You both shake hands. Something ignites within, but you think it’s because he has such a good aura…
*
“You are such a great actress!”, he is telling you, so many months later. “Quit with the production, you are better than me in decorating the lines.”
You grimace, which makes him laugh. The sound of his laughter is so comforting, like this call to your home.
“I don’t like this acting thing”, you dismiss his compliments nonchalantly. Today, you are in a cafeteria, celebrating the end of another semester. One more to go and you will be ready to keep up with your lives, though you and Hayden had vowed to each other never to be apart. “I feel more comfortable behind the cameras. By the way, I just had this idea!”
And then you lean to him, ready to shake him by his shoulders. He nearly chokes with his coke—but then laughing as always because your impulsiveness often brings him to laughters.
“For the love of God, woman. Do you want to see me dead before the time?”
You side smirk, silently apologizing with your puppy eyes. Hayden smiles back, before encouraging with what you had to say with only a nod. As you do, he seems to suddenly notice how nice your hair looks this day.
“I just had the greatest idea ever! I could film your audition and send to George Lucas. The Star Wars director is looking for someone of our age to portray young Anakin Skywalker. You know, before he becomes Darth Vader, of course.”
Hayden is taken aback by what you tell him. You can see the mix of sentiments that rises behind his blue eyes: insecurity, suspicious before reasoning to excitement.
“What? Are you for real, Y/N? How come did you hear about it? I mean…”
You tell him how your internship led you to it. This is how the fun begins, how both of you in fact begin your career.
*
You are there in every moment of his life: when Hayden has to conciliate his last semester with the filming of “Episode II: Attack of the Clones”, when he tells you that he and his on-screen romantic pair are having a thing.
He is also present at your graduation, the moment when you begin to transit to adulthood. What about it when you get yourself drunk for the very first time?
He is there too.
“I hate the taste of alcohol”, you grumble, unsure how come you are at his couch. “It aches my stomach, makes me sick.”
Hayden chuckles at how all of a suddenly you turn into these kind of discoveries after spending five years in college doing nothing but well behaving. However, due to such a strong bond you two share, he takes care of you.
“This is the moment where I tell you something you told me once: better to put out than to swallow all in.”
You raise your face, eyes twinkling with amusement.
“Did you just hear yourself?!”
“Wasn’t that what you told me?”
“No!”, you laugh hard at his remark. “Oh my God, H!”
He chuckles after you.
“Well, it did make you laugh, didn’t it?”
***
• The subtle changes…
You are single again. Your ex dumped you. Coincidently, Hayden is single as well. He’s also been going through a difficult phase in his life after all the critics coming from the fans of “Star Wars”. “Episode III” of the franchise didn’t go that well and even though it’s been a year since it’s release, he’s still affected by it.
“We’ve been through so much together”, Hayden tells you one day. “We should definitely do something new for a change.”
“I agree”, you sigh. Currently unemployed, you haven’t been yourself lately either. “Any thoughts?”
“A good journey would do us well. Let us go to Scotland”, so he says, excited. “Come on, Y/N. I’ll let you drive!”
You chuckle at his old tendency to be so reckless. And you do so because you can’t refuse him anything. A bad omen you clearly ignore, of course.
“Very well. When should we do this trip?”
But why’d you bother to ask when you know the answer? Hayden smiles warmly at him.
Oh that damn smile…
“Tomorrow. I’ve already bought the tickets and booked the hotel.”
You scoff at him, offended.
“What? Why? Are you taking me for granted, Christensen? For the love of God…”
Just like that he lifts you up and throws you over his shoulder, smiling as you scream out of surprise. As he puts you down, Hayden messes with your hair, delighted when seeing he’s the reason of your amusement.
And he realizes this is a nice view to contemplate: the sight of your smile, the sound of your laughters, the joy that sparks in your eyes… Seeing you like this makes him genuinely smile in his turn and forget about his bad phase.
But he doesn’t realize that this may mean something else. Or perhaps he doesn’t want to. It’s been years now since you and him became the closest of the friends, so what if all of this is just the result of genuine admiration from one friend to the other?
Regardless, he’s going to take you with him to Scotland. And so you go with him… It is wild to consider how you are usually all straight, not doing nothing that goes out the line all the whilst Hayden is more prompted to take chances and live the present quite intently.
On that fact you blame him being very aries all the whilst you, as taurus lady, prefer to know where you are going. However, he makes life so interesting that even you, as already observed, cannot deny him anything.
So here you are now at Edinburgh.
“I love everything that is medieval”, you tell him excitedly with a spark in your eyes that makes Hayden smile. He does like when you speak passionately about the things you are interested. “I cannot believe I took so long to come here!”
“Yeah, me neither!”
It is a good time to be alive, both of you agree. The landscape is seductive, peaceful, traits much sought after such a bad period you both went through. People too are kind, albeit reserved, but very pleasant.
Those days are being built in your memory as something great to be remembered, but perhaps there is just more that neither seem too attentive…
“Lady, one bedroom with two beds”, asks Hayden, when you got to London eventually because he, of course, is a man who plans very little—much to your distress, the woman who likes everything settled.
But this is not any hotel, but a fanciful one. The said lady looks at him pitifully.
“Mr Christensen, my apologies, but there is only a suite with one bed.”
You two blush, but Hayden somehow doesn’t mind it. This is when you realize you not only don’t mind it but you also want it…badly. Perhaps that’s why you sabotage it.
“You know what? Let’s make it for another day. Come now, Hayden. Thank you”, you blurt out, pushing him outside.
“What the hell was that?”, he frowns at you. “Y/N, what’s wrong with sharing a bed? Do you honestly think anything would happen or what?”
He doesn’t realize his words hurt you, but in truth there is more than his subtle frustration at your refusal allows him to admit. There is an unspoken rising desire between you.
And of course you have to ruin everything.
“I just… please don’t be upset! It’s because I cannot afford it and…” and you tell him the other reason for it, which appeases his anger and is more palpable than you’d care to admit: you are expecting an interview.
Hayden softens, naturally, but you know he’s changed. You hate it because you know why. There are so many things that suddenly rise in your throat but they die choked.
Somehow Hayden knows it too. But he chickens away. He hugs you instead, not willing to lose his best friend.
“I’m sorry for being such an impulsive jackass. But we did have a great time, didn’t we?”
Oh but if only you knew what waits for you back to US…
***
• The marriage
Here you are, dressed in yellow, standing as a maid in honor for the bride and groom. Your heart breaks because you realize a little too late that you are in love with your best friend.
Worse is: had you accepted to share one bed with Hayden in London, everything would be different. Yeah, you may not have gotten that job as a producer of that movie, but Hayden wouldn’t meet Rachel Bilson.
Nonetheless, here you are. Celebrating their vows, wondering if you could be there for a moment, what would be like if you were her.
“Hey, Y/Nickname!”, Hayden exclaims after the ceremony is over. He is wearing his gorgeous smile and dressed in fanciful robes, which all highlights his handsomeness. But you have learned to bury everything deep inside your heart. A secret that you’d take to your grave.
“I can’t believe you are married, Hay!”, you giggle when you greet him with a tight embrace. “I’m so happy for you! Oh my God, look how grown up you are!”
He laughs quietly.
“I know right? Who’d ever thought? The idea of marriage was hardly ever entertained for me”, so he says.
“Oh right! As I told Rachel once, I do have recollections of your drunkenness state and all that came between”, you laugh too, remembering the first time he had a hangover.
“What a time to be alive”, says Hayden in his typical good mood.
As you speak, you do seem to come to terms that if he is happy, so are you. You are at peace with it at long last. Hayden, on his turn, for a time seems to have suspected that you harbored feelings for him. But he always ignored it for the sake of your friendship. Now seeing how genuinely happy you are for him, certainly he believes it was all a thing of his head.
But why does he have a bittersweet taste of it?
“Could you introduce me to that man over there?” You nudge his sides, pointing to a handsome man that is not very far from Rachel herself.
Hayden raises an eyebrow.
“Really, now, Y/N?”
“You don’t expect me to be a nun, do you?”
He chuckles.
“Well I don’t want to see you get hurt, is all…”
Quite unwillingly, though, he leads the way. And maybe the night will not end that bad for you, after all.
***
•The divorce and the consequences…
In fact, looking back now it was really a great job pushing Hayden to introduce the guy to you because he ended up becoming your boyfriend.
This new relationship of yours, however, changed the dynamics of your friendship with Hayden for some time—but maybe it was all because he was living a different life now, becoming a father in the process.
A few years rolled upon, though, when everything started to fall apart—for you and Hayden. You found out that your new relationship was damaged because you and your boyfriend were scared to be lonely. A crisis developed to fights, to exchange of words that only broke hearts.
In the meantime, Hayden realized how long he missed his best friend. His own marriage started to fall apart, but the more it broke down, the more he needed you again.
Was it a selfish wish to have you by his side? Such questionings never reached you out due to his pride, that masked his hurt. Perhaps he was only scared to be lonely too. He could deal with it himself.
Nonetheless, destiny—the same destiny that pushed one from the other—is about to bring you two together again. One call and your night would be different.
You are single now, ready to go out that night with your girlfriends when suddenly a phone call startles you. It’s Hayden. Your heart races: he hasn’t been the one to call, and hasn’t done so for a long while.
“Hey, H. How are you? Haven’t heard of you for some time. Is everything ok?”, you ask, concerned.
There is a pause that accelerates your heart. You know he is not well. Before he answers, you immediately add:
“I’ll be in your home in a few minutes.”
“I’ll give you the new address. I’m not living with Rachel anymore: we got divorced.”
You are stunned upon those words. Now your silence leaves Hayden uncomfortable. He breaks it by saying:
“Y/Nickname? Are you there?”
“Yes, honey, I am. I’m so sorry, Hay. Please stay there… I’ll be on my way.”
He chuckles.
“Where else would I go to?”
In a matter of minutes, after requesting an Uber, you, dressed the way you are, arrive to his new home. Hayden side smirks when seeing you, though how he eyes you up and down makes you blush lightly.
“Wow, Y/N. Looking hot, aren’t you?”, he laughs when seeing the pink painting your cheeks, hugging you tight when receiving you. “Please tell me I didn’t ruin your night.”
You slap his shoulder playfully, eyes rolling at his drama.
“Don’t say bullshit to me, Christensen. I just wish I knew it properly before. I hope you don’t mind me looking like this.”
“You have always been a distraction to my eyes”, he teases you, pleased to see nothing has really changed between the two of you. “We need some wine, it’s not really a warming night, I suppose.”
As you look into his new apartment, he promptly gets the best wine to serve you. Without your knowledge, Hayden’s eyes follow your moves: noticing your y/c hair is now on your shoulders, how vivid your eyes are, remaining as observing and curious as before.
He cannot help admiring you physically too: though this is a cold night and you are dressed accordingly, when you drop your black coat on his coach, he sees your warming blouse shows some skin.
Indeed, Y/N, looking as hot and beautiful as always. Such is his thought.
He never really told you but Rachel was jealous of you. According to her, she could see you harbored feelings for him and part of her feared Hayden would correspond. Nonsense, he’d tell her.
But now, was she really so wrong? Yet, another and more important question he asks himself is: how could have he let go of you? Not only about matters of sentimentalism, but you’ve been an important piece of his life.
Seeing you back hurts his heart because he now sees the stupidity in letting go of you. He wishes he could have asked you to wait for him, to never let go of you. But this is such a state of complex selfishness that he quiets his internal riot and puts a smile on his lips when bringing the two of you the best wine he has, aware you prefer the sweet ones.
“I was admiring your new apartment”, you tell him, smiling in thanks as he passes you a full glass. “Whoa, looks like we are having a full drinking night, aren’t we? Christensen, I am not that young anymore. Not sure I am prepared to have a full hangover again.”
Hayden cracks loud and the sound of his laughters makes your heart skip a beat. Nothing feels different, you think, pleased.
“I’m bringing us something to eat, silly head. Besides I’ve always taken care of you, right?”
“That is true”, you agree. “But what are we having to eat today?”
“Always hungry, eh?”, he teases you.
You shrug playfully before saying:
“What can I do? I am a Taurus, you know it!”
He rolls his eyes, laughing loud again at your remarks—and that sound has always made your heart race, hasn’t it?
“Not with that astrology nonsense again!”
You slap his arm playfully before joining him in chuckles.
“Always with that astrology nonsense, silly.”
It is not until pizza is brought to you that the serious conversation is finally there.
“So what happened, Hayden?”, you ask him softly.
He sighs heavily, avoiding your gaze. He is silent, but you are patient, giving some time, for which he appreciates it.
“How often do we fall for the idea our minds make of the person?”, says he, sounding frustrated. “Not rarely we come to romantic ideas of marriage that break before the crude reality, you know? It’s not just about being different, Y/N, it’s… the commitment, I suppose, in making everything right. Turns out we had very different ideas of making it right.”
“I’m sorry, Hay. I really am”, you speak gently, taking his hand to yours, realizing how broken he is makes your heart sensitive to his pain.
He appreciates it, but when feeling your skin against him, Hayden is remembered the days before he met Rachel. The way he made you smile, the jokes that brought him to laughters. How easily it was to be around you, how you softened him. He, who was never a sentimental man, hugged you more times than he realized.
But Hayden sweeps away such memories.
“I am too. But I am fine now”, he shrugs. “I mean, not entirely recovered, but better than being broken.”
“Take your time, it’s the best you can do. How long has it been going on?”
Hayden hesitates but says:
“Six months.”
Your eyes go wide and your voice comes louder than expected:
“YOU HAVE GONE THROUGH A DIVORCE SIX MONTHS AGO?”
At least he has the decency to blush.
“Hayden! How could you keep me in secret for such a long time?!”
You’d remove his hand but Hayden doesn’t let you to. Pulling you to his side, he says, almost in a tone of desperation:
“I thought I could handle this by myself”, he explains. “I really didn’t want to bother you…”
Perhaps it’s the wine, but your tongue runs loose with words that have long been choked in your throat.
“And what am I to you? A second option, a plan B that didn’t work out? You’ve kicked me out of your life, Hayden. You’ve never called me to ask me if I was doing ok!”
He gives you a painful look that makes you regret instantly of what you said. You’d think he let go of you and a fight would come—this happened once when both of you were drunk, though by then you were both silly and immature.
“I’ve got a war in my mind for a long while”, he exclaims, holding your wrist and he pulls you even closer to him. “I was fucking stupid, I screwed it, I know. But never would I kick you out of my heart, Y/N! And I… I’m sorry I was fucking blinded by my pain. But only because I feared to hurt you.”
You await for his burst to end, very familiar with his intensity—but when his blue eyes search for yours, your soul is denuded.
Oh fuck.
“I stepped away because he was a douchebag”, he proceeds. “You deserved better than such a man, Y/N. I’ve heard of his doings but I couldn’t reach you out when… when I was in the mid of a crisis myself.”
“You’ve always been too shut in yourself to let others in”, you sigh. “But what relation is there with the fact I was in a relationship?”
“You deserved better”, he says with greeted teeth, holding your face with his hands, both of you barely noticing how your bodies have been dancing dangerously close to each other. “You are still slow after all this time?”
You are shocked, perplexed by his words. You freeze. Hayden smiles slowly at your reaction.
“I feel it everywhere, nothing scares me anymore. I won’t let you go. Now now, not ever. Fuck, I married the wrong person. Heaven has always been my favourite place on Earth when I was with you.”
“You have always been the best”, you mumble incoherently.
Just like that your lips clash against his. In between fervent kisses, where he pulls you to his lap, no reason is admitted. Not anymore.
“I’ve missed you, Y/Nickname”, he groans against your lips. “Like the sun misses the moon.”
“Always the romantic”, you chew his bottom lip as your hands run over his hair, pulling it gently. “Don’t want your memories anymore. Fuck, Christensen, you took so long.”
“This is not a game, I swear”, he breaks the kiss to pursuit your skin, his tongue already on your neck as his hands hold your hips, making you feel his rigid pants.
“Oh Lord. My worst sin is to never be able to refuse you anything”, you hate how wine makes you speak your mind.
Raising his head to watch you intently, he messes with your hair before holding your chin, drawing you closer to him.
Oh that intensity that involves one to the other!
“Then make me a sinner too for giving you all that you deserve.”
You crawl over him, you know you do, when your tongue pursuits his, one pairs the other rhythmically, perfectly. And then he lies you there on the couch, hands already working to remove your pants.
His eyes are set on yours like that of a hunter about to capture his prey. He knows you are on fire and that he is the gasoline. You lean partly to remove his shirt, hands all over him. You gasp when feeling his muscles under your touch and you want more, but…
“Patience, Y/Nickname”, his voice is husky and domineering when laying you down again.
“Yes, Master”, you giggle softly, in such a state that makes you both smile to the other.
And just like that his hands find way to your thighs, gently parting before inserting one right there in your feminine parts, not really taking away your panties for such.
“Oh, God!” You moan sensually, enjoying his eyes on you as he works wonderfully on you. “This is better than I thought!”
“Is it?”, he groans softly in your ear. “How long have you been thinking about it, dear one?”
“For a long while! God knows how much…”, another moan breaks you, earning him a smirk. “Hayden…”
“Yeah?”
“I fucked him thinking about you”, you admit.
His eyes dart, his body shakes lightly with desire. Slowly moving on top of you, his moves increase intently, watching you with desire.
“Damned be you for never speaking your thoughts to me”, he lifts your blouse gently but you help him removing it. As he starts to kiss your neck down to your chest, your legs begin to get heavy at his tenderness. “You should have spoken it to me…”
“Never had I the courage to do so”, you moan, enjoying having his hand over your neck lightly as he bites down your bra, slowly removing it with his mouth.
“For you should. It would have spared us some time. I fucked her thinking of you too”, he admits it drunkly before burying his lips to your nipple, much to your delight.
Hayden ruins you and it’s better than you could have thought. You want him to yourself, to make him unspeakable things but it’s difficult to do or say anything when his lips are so occupied with each nipple, twirling his tongue around it, sucking and biting it.
The sounds in his living room go louder each time. You are brought to heaven, and only then you take control of yourself again.
“Hayden…”, you barely speak when he finishes with you.
You both are a puddle of mess when you, nude, sit over his lap. You share a drunk look, one filled with the darkest desires for so long muffled, now brought to light.
“Yes, babe?” He kisses your shoulders, groaning as you rub yourself against his hardness. “Will you forgive me for such a behavior?”
His words are barely heard when his head is thrown back because your skillful hands find way to his pants and remove it so soon.
You glance at his manhood, impressed by how it is when it’s this hard under your touch.
“You don’t deserve forgiveness”, you giggle softly as you start rubbing it, enjoying to feel the drip of it. “You should be punished.”
He holds back a gasp at your words. Now eyeing you, interested in your upcoming moves. And when you slide to your knees…
“Babe…”
“Yeah?”
One glance. Unspoken words fill the air. And you take with his mouth at long last, not stopping until you have it all down your throat.
“For God’s sake!”, he gasps. “I can’t wait any longer to have you with me!”
All gentleness is left aside when he helps you settle on his lips and he slides inside you. To feel him throbbing like this, going so hard in you makes you arch your back.
“This feels so good!”
His hands move down your back as his lips pursuit your skin, licking and taking every bit of you—though he does know how much you enjoy when he takes his time around your nipples, which he does graciously.
But it’s not until his eyes meet yours, sealing your lips as much as you seal your bodies together, that all is at long last truly consumed….
***
• Nowadays
In a sober state, everything is better appreciated. Hayden watches as you gleefully prepare breakfast. There is nothing but genuinely love in his eyes.
What had started as an explosion of sentiments for so long kept in secret has now flown to what should have always been: a genuine relationship. From friends to lovers. From lovers to something better.
He smiles, not now missing the lateness of his realization that you have always been the love of his life. He stands and moves to behind you, holding you close and smelling your scent as you prepare him some eggs.
“What? I’ve been sensing your eyes over me”, you giggle like a little girl. “Don’t get me weak again, Christensen. This is so not you.”
He turns you at him and holds your face between his hands.
“I love you, Y/Nickname.”
Hayden smiles wide when seeing a blush painting your cheeks. And he beams when you tell him the same.
“I love you too, H. Though I fear I love you more.”
“That is not true”, he protests in between laughters.
But before you fall into that old cliche you and him enjoy in secret intimacy, breakfast is ready. As you two enjoy that morning moment, it doesn’t strike as how many years have passed before you two achieved it at long last.
“I have news to tell”, says Hayden with a bright smile on his lips.
You rest your chin over your hands and say:
“Well? Tell me at once.”
He appreciates all the love that comes from you. The way you look at him, how genuinely you listen and help him in every moment, how kind you always are, how sincere you speak your heart out. So many virtues and even your flaws he appreciates.
There is so much love between the lines and out of them too.
“I was asked to play Anakin Skywalker again.”
And how fantastic you are as his soon to be wife when you jump in his arms excited with his news.
“That is awesome, my darling! I’m so happy for you!”
“A better start than I could have thought”, he admits, pulling you to sit on his lap.
“You deserve it all”, you brush your lips against his. “I love you, my heart.”
“I love you, my soul”, he whispers back.
And this is the ending you deserve.
***
•Epilogue…
When you show up dressed in red—from your full lips to your body—Hayden feels something rise in his chest.
“My God, you look gorgeous, Y/N…”, so he says mischievously when you show up after leaving him waiting for 30 minutes. “It was worth the time…”
You giggle, blushing lightly after all this time. Your hair is loose wavily, put on side as you wear the necklace and earrings Hayden gifted you in your birthday.
“Don’t be silly. Have they arrived yet?”
The occasion is to celebrate Hayden and Ewan’s series “Kenobi”. Hayden’s aforementioned friend said he was going to pick them up in a limo so they’d go all together.
“They are about to… which leaves us a few minutes”, he places right behind you, holding your waist tightly.
“Hayden… It took me some time to get properly dressed. Besides, I…” you get lost at your words when he starts kissing your neck and his hands move up and down your back.
“What are you trying to say?”
Hayden smirks, enjoying the effect he has over you. It’s been some good years since you got together, but even now he manages to get you speechless.
“I…”
Your mind goes blank when he turns you to the mirror and see the naughty look that rests in those blue eyes. His hands move to your breasts, playing with your nipples before slowly exposing them.
“Hayden… they are….” You moan softly, struggling to keep your composure.
He turns you now against the wall of your bathroom, mouth dropping to your full chest all the whilst his hands move to your thighs.
“Hmm”, he sings softly, humming against your skin. “Hot as hell, wife.”
You try not to fall from your heels.
“Hayden!” You cry out when his fingers find all the way to you.
“You get your man on knees every single time. Getting me overzealous, uh?”, he smirks when going to his knees. “All wet for me, honey? Let me taste you thus…”
You are almost ruined as he does so, his tongue in you the way you want him to. You forget yourself, forget the reason why this expensive gown you bought three months ago was quite difficult to dress—precisely why you’d want to tell him by the end of the night.
You forget your state, you forget you should be checking time before your friends arrive. There is nothing to remember as he fucks you with his tongue deliciously until you are about to come undone…
Just like that he lifts your thighs and before you complain, he slides his manhood within, fucking you slowly and pleasantly.
“Oh God!” You scream but he has to quiet your sounds, especially because… the bell is rang.
“That was quick”, he manages to say breathlessly as he rushes to keep himself recomposed.
You giggle, suddenly shy as you do the same.
“Indeed…”
Hayden finds you adorable and peppers kisses around your face.
“They can wait a little. I thought you wanted to say something… you know, before…”
You two share a giggle and he smiles when you bury your face in his shoulder.
“I… I am pregnant, H.”
He hugs you closer. What a night, what a life with you is. Hayden Christensen could not have been any happier…
#star wars#star wars imagine#imagine star wars#Hayden Christensen#Anakin Skywalker#darth vader#Hayden Christensen smut#hayden christensen x y/n#Hayden Christensen x female reader
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simp notes
this is a bonus chapter for 'support your local caffeine dealer'
okay that being said AHHHHH!!!!! I've had this written for so long and ik chapter three of mmi is taking a bit so I wanted to post this now!! I love it, it's a peak into their relationship past the fic w lots of introspection from shayne, it's adorable! 2.8 words! enjoy xx mwah 💓
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Shayne woke up much earlier than he planned to, so he found himself sat in silence at your shared dining table, staring at his mug of coffee. He unintentionally mirrored your actions in the exact moment that brought him to this point today.
The start of your relationship was a bit rocky, filled with pining and misunderstandings, but Shayne wouldn't change a thing about it.
Four and a half years, one shared apartment, and two cats later, everything felt right. Not perfect yet, but close. Your lives meshed together perfectly in every little way he never imagined it would.
You had similar food tastes, but neither of you liked the other person's favorite snacks or cereals, so no arguments about stealing. You like opposing chores, making it easily to share the weight. You showered at night, him in the morning. You liked the same books, so you shared your libraries now.
You'd been promoted recently, the position allowing a bit more flexibility with your schedule; so you and Shayne often woke up together in the morning and arrived around the same time at night.
The welcome addition of you to his friend group even meant that making plans was extremely easy. Shayne was also immensely thankful to have you with him at pretty much ever group outting.
He felt like you two knew every small thing about each other, so the secret he was keeping weighed heavy. For three months and twelve days he has been keeping the biggest secret from you, and everyone else.
The small velvet box sat in the bottom drawer of your dresser, stuffed between a pair of jeans that were actually too short for Shayne and a pair of Halloween themed sweatpants that matched a pair of your own. He could find it blindfolded at this point with how often he took it from it's spot, almost four times a day, contemplating when it would be the right time. It didn't feel right until earlier in the morning.
Just at 7:39AM, Shayne shot out of his sleep, his heart fluttering as he glanced over his shoulder, finding you softly snoring. His alarm hadn't gone off yet, the two of you didn't need to be up until around ten.
You had the day off and Shayne only had one shoot on his schedule, one you were going to be apart of.
You had been in a couple of shoots in the few years since your relationship had been known to the internet. Some fans had recognized you from the crew and casts personal accounts, especially Kimmy and Damien's.
You were very well received in your first appearance at Shayne's graduation, your speech bringing him and most of your friends to tears. After that you had been brought into an 'Eat It Or Yeet It" video, getting your first chance to witness your boyfriend's grave mouth first hand. After all of the love for you came in, you appeared on a Board AF' episode and began making memes for 'Who Meme'd It?'
You kept your privacy and boundaries still, your social medias were all still set to private, making it clear that you'd appear on occasions, but wouldn't join.
Shayne was fully supportive when you told him this after he mentioned the idea of you coming in for a video. You loved your job, having moved up into management of the shop, the promotion coming as a huge surprise to you, but not to Shayne.
Today you and Shayne were do on set at 2PM, shooting another TNTL episode, as per request of the other's lined up in the shoot. Damien and Courtney were quick to shoot Kimmy the idea, which wasn't hard to greenlight when the producer was your best friend. The easy part was over, convincing you was much more difficult. It tooka lot of coaxing from your friends, but Shayne remained neutral. It almost pissed you off that each time you asked him for advice on whether or not you should do it, he'd say it's up to you. Shayne couldn't help it, he still finds himself not wanting to push you too far, he still wants to protect you from anything he can. Most fans loved you, but what if it stops? He was still in shock of how much everyone seemed to like you. His heart couldn't help but flutter with pride and joy each time he read a comment that spoke highly of you.
It couldn't compare to the love Shayne has for you. He writes every small, tender thought he has about you down in his phone. He isn't sure when they started now, but it was definitely before you had started dating.
He started off using it to get things off of his chest, to write down the words of admiration that he wished he could tell you. Overtime it'd had begun to be every thought he'd had about you.
"I told the stars about you"
"you're the only one want to wake up next to"
"I wonder what goes through your mind when someone says my name"
Damien and Spencer have heard almost all of them, extremely supportive of him, always quick to call it sweet. That's then followed with different ways to call Shayne a simp. It turned into a joke between them, dubbing them Shayne's Simp Notes.
Gears were turning as Shayne shuffled from your bed quietly, grabbing his phone from the night stand before wandering into the living area, brewing coffee.
He took a deep breath, unlocking his phone as he finished replaying his morning in his head before noting the time. 8:17AM is when the perfect idea strikes, apparently.
Shayne was quick to open the notes app and begin writing out everything. He's loosely planned sketches for the show before but this was much bigger, he wrote out every detail to make sure it'd go right.
After about an hour of nonstop writing with Shayne's eyes glued to his screen, his coffee long gone cold, your yawn echos down the hall.
A smile stretches across his face as he finishes his last line, closing out of the app before setting his phone on the tabletop. You enter the room rubbing your eyes as yOu mile softly at Shayne. His ASU shirt covered your top half, an old pair of gym shorts covered your bottom.
Without a word, you made your way over to Shayne's lap, straddling him as you rest your head on his shoulder while he rubs your back gently.
The two of you tend to lay in bed together and cuddle if you're up before your alarms, enjoying the peace of being together before beginning your respective days. On the off days where that doesn't happen, you tend to make up for that lost time whenever you can, like right now.
"Ditch me on my day off, I see how it is." You chuckled as you sat up, rubbing your fingers lightly through Shayne's hair as he groaned playfully.
"I'm sorry, you're just dating an absolute genius, and I had a breakthrough, baby." Shayne laughed softly as you rolled your eyes; he moved to cup your cheeks pressing his lips to yours softly.
The two of you sat there for a bit longer, chatting until your alarms rang in your distant bedroom. You sullenly removed yourself from Shayne's lap, snagging his mug of coffee before disappearing down the same halway you'd wandered out of earlier.
"Ew, Shayne this is so old! How long have you been up?!" You shouted as your turned off the ringing, prompting a laugh from Shayne.
He makes sure to bring you a fresh mug, prepared just how you like as you're busy getting ready later. Your heart swelled at the small action.
It wasn't anything out of the ordinary from Shayne, he loved using small, subtle ways to show his affection. You always had fresh flowers from the very beginning of your relationship, sometimes you'd have more than one bouquet at a time. He's been a big fan of ordering things to you while he's away, off on shoots or even while hest at work.
He once ordered groceries to your apartment and video called you to cook together when he was on a trip to visit his parents.
You adored him so much. This relationship had far exceeded what you thought it could be, and you couldn't be happier. You're heart swells at just the thought of your boyfriend and everything he means to you.
The two of you arrived on set a bit early, giving you time to mingle with everyone. You were quick to dart from Shayne, heading toward Kimmy and Courtney across the room.
Shayne stood off to the side, staring at his phone screen once more. He felt like he was gonna scream, throw up, and cry all at once. He just needed to get through this. It's just an episode with his friends, he's gonna tell jokes and do his characters, his girlfriends gonna be there, it's gonna be amazing.
The box sat heavy on his thigh in the front pocket of his jeans, the outline barely concealed by the flannel he had buttoned over his white tee in an attempt to hide it.
Shayne eyed Kimmy, chewing his lip as she finally departed from her conversation with you. He was quick to grab her, requesting something weird of her. He needed you to go last, this wasn't something he wanted to have as the opening bit.
He kept the reasoning to himself, and Kimmy didn't seem too concerned about it so she happily agreed.
Once the others had arrived, Noah only setting the shoot back half an hour, they began rolling. You did great, getting Damien out quickly with an inside joke the three of you had shared after a trip to Universal one night.
Shayne was so nervous he found himself laughing his way through his joke, which eventually got Damien after it had become evident that Shayne wouldn't be able to stop his laughter.
His nerves had settled a bit, his arms wrapped around your shoulders, small kissed placed on your forehead between your bits, hidden by the divider.
You grinned as the end of the video neared, you being called to the yellow stool last. You filled your mouth with water and gave a thumbs up as you heard rustling from behind the divider.
"Okay, this isn't my turn but just wanna do this real quick" Shayne called out, peering around the corner as you shrugged.
After a few seconds, a toy crow flew over the clothing rack as Shayne belted out a purposefully bad impression of Train. You spewed instantly as cackling sounded from your boyfriend.
"I hate you!" You called out as you refilled your mouth, shaking your head.
"No, you don't." He called back, laughing.
The others' bits flew by as Shayne stood behind the divider, his wig and phone clutched tightly in his hands as he took deep breaths.
Shayne told you to close your eyes as he pulled on the curly, bob wig from a character of his.
You had a hate/love relationship of Shayne's simp character, Sir Phillip Simpne, so he felt it was right for this occasion. He had his phone hidden behind an open book as he moved to stand beside you on the stool. He cleared his throat, offering you a smile as your opened your eyes.
You groaned, keeping your mouth shut as you shook your head, determined to hold it over Shayne that he couldn't make you laugh with this bit.
"I haven't a poem for you today, m'lady," Shayne begun, trying his best not to laugh as you stared at him blankly. "I offer you something better. I bring love notes that I have written about the fair maiden before me today."
Shayne's palms felt sweaty as he looked down at his phone, deciding to drop the accent as he read to you, the giggles from others were silent to him.
"l'm gonna start from the beginning, kind of," He smiled, nodding as he looked up at you, removing the wig. "I wrote 'I never planned to like you this much and never planned to think about you this often' right before we started dating."
Shayne couldn't look at you as he felt tears prickle at his eyes, his throat running dry as he knew he'd run out of time.
Nobody in the room was counting anymore. Once Shayne had gotten more serious, the air in the room shifted and everyone grew quiet.
You sat in the chair, head tilted in confusion when Shayne had dropped the character, the game leaving your mind all together as you tried to process what was happening.
"Uh, 'I wonder if we ever think about each other at the same time.'" He kept his eyes on his phone, a bit scared to meet your eyes. You stared at him in perplexion.
"Okay, on my birthday I wrote 'of all the things my hands have held, the best by far is you', then the next day wrote 'there's been a place for you in my heart since we first met.'" Shayne sniffled, looking to you with teary eyes, chuckling a bit.
You took in his appearance with your brows furrowed, his cheeks were bright red, his blue eyes glistening.
"So, yeah, those are some of my Simp Notes." Shayne spoke softly as he caught sight of you laughing, some water dribbling from your lips.
You stood from the stool, taking a few steps away as you swallowed, wiping your mouth. You were still clueless as to what exactly was happening, but the name had caught you off guard and made you laugh.
Shayne felt like time slowed down, everything was going too perfectly as he removed the box from his pocket, your back still to him as you laughed.
He found himself grateful for your unwillingness to laugh at him, you allowed him to tell you some of the things he hadn't been able to before.
The energy had come back to the room, everyone laughing as soon as you broke, the assumptions previously made now leaving everyone's mind until Shayne drops to one knee.
A few gasps are heard as you turn back toward Shayne. small shriek leaves you as your eyes widden quickly at the sight.
You two had talked about marriage before, and you both wanted to get married, but you didn't expect this. Nothing could've given this away for you.
"I wanna spend the rest of my life making you laugh." Shayne chuckled as you laughed a rolled your eyes as the purposely bad joke.
"Y/N, will you marry me?" Shayne's voice barely audible, the crew further back hadn't even heard him ask.
"Yes, Shayne!" You squeal, your boyf- no.
Your fiance is quick to grab you, wrapping his arms around your waist as he lifts you up. The two of you are a mess of tears, smiles, sniffles, kisses, and whispers as the room is filled with cheers.
You and Shayne are quickly enveloped with loads of your friends, the shock and excitement evident throughout the room.
After a few minutes, Kimmy hugs you and Shayne tightly, congratulating the two of you continuously, quickly gasping as she looks up.
"I can't believe you didn't tell anyone!" Kimmy sniffles, smacking Shayne's chest lightly as he laughed. You looked to him with wide eyes, quickly looking to Damien in confusion as he shook his head.
"Yeah, I've had the ring for... uh, some time now" Shayne laughed, blushing brightly as you at him in awe. "I wanted to surprise you, and| wanted to have a bunch of people we care about with us to celebrate, it just felt right."
Shayne couldn't hide his embarrassment as you wrapped him into another hug, the two of you embracing each other for a few moments, happy tears falling from and for the couple.
"Oh my god, we're still doing a video, holy shit." She laughs, wiping her own tears as she quickly moved out of frame, the rest of the crew following suit. The cast quickly surrounded you once more, each with bright smiles and tear stained cheeks.
You sit back on the stool, grinning as Shayne stands beside you, his arm draped over your shoulders.
"Pst." Damien called loudly from Shayne's other side. "You should give her the ring, Shayne." He whisper-yelled, causing a fit of giggles to ripple through everyone, both you and Shayne blushing deeply.
He fumbles a bit as he opens it again, pulling the delicate, ornate ring from the box before sliding it on to your finger.
You pressed your hand on to your lap, grinning as you stared at the accessory that fit you perfectly in every way.
"I could not imagine being a comedian and having to go on after this guy." Spencer called from out of frame, causing Shayne to cackle.
You guys were quick to wrap up your outro, Shayne still wrapped around you the whole time, placing a kiss to your forehead as they called for a wrap on the shoot.
This was the perfect he was looking for.
#AHHHHHH#i love this so much#i started writing this before i finished chapter four#this fic is my favorite#its my baby#this is my pride and joy#shayne topp au#shayne topp smut#shayne topp x reader#smosh shayne#shayne topp#shayne topp imagine#shayne#smosh#damien haas#kimmy jimenez#Spencer agnew#sylcd tag#mine#smosh au#smosh games#damien haas imagine
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You Are My Heaven On Earth - Joel Miller
Pairing: No outbreak!Joel Miller x Fem!Reader
Summary: You and Joel have been dating for over a year, but you never knew he could sing until Sarah revealed his little secret to you during a movie night.
Warnings: Sub!Joel, Oral sex (fem receiving), slight cockblocking, Joel singing is his own warning, soft!Joel
WC: 2173
A/N: It's finally here! This is my first time posting smut, so please be kind. Shoutout to @tightjeansjavi and @chaotic-mystery for helping me when I started to PANIC. Y'all are my saviors.
Link to the song Joel sings here.
You’d met Joel about a year ago, having just moved a few blocks away from his house in the same neighborhood. When a neighbor suggested Joel’s company to fix the fence on your property, you were pleasantly surprised to find that Mr. Miller was an extremely attractive man your age and not an older gentleman with decades worth of relationships in your vicinity.
Joel and his younger brother Tommy replaced your fence easily and in a timely fashion, even sealing the wood when you asked about weather protection.
You spent the week watching the brothers work and when Tommy wasn’t there, learning more about Joel. You learned he was a single dad to a daughter named Sarah, who was ten and his entire world. He’d been a contractor since before graduating high school and started his own company just a few years ago after his brother returned from the military.
He also learned about you, how you worked at the museum in town as a curator after graduating from graduate school a few years previous. How one of your great grandparents had died and left you a chunk of change big enough to put a deposit on a house.
You made him lunch every day, paired with either countless glasses of water or lemonade. It started as a kindness, something to show him appreciation for his work. But by the third day, you were itching to see his sweat soaked face and thick arms enter your house, sit at your table and eat the food you’d prepared for him.
By the end of the week, you weren’t willing to let Joel walk out of your life until you needed another job done. As soon as you had handed Joel the check for his work and watched him place it in his pocket, you took the pen you were holding and boldly grabbed his hand, scribbling your house number over his knuckles.
Joel called you as soon as he’d gotten home that evening.
So here you were, a year later, snuggling with Sarah on their couch watching the newest Barbie movie while you waited for Joel to come home for the night. When he still hadn’t arrived at her bed time, you went through the motions with her and tucked her in before returning to the couch.
The evening’s Jeopardy episode was rerunning when Joel entered the house about an hour later, a heavy sigh falling from his lips. He was happy to see it was only you on the couch, though he felt horrible for leaving you with Sarah duty, again. It was an unfortunate habit over the last few weeks, a particular job causing him anguish and keeping him late.
You looked at him brightly from where you sat, your smile wide as you greeted him. “Hi, honey. Come sit.” You patted the couch next to you, luring him in.
He abided, sighing again as he settled into the cushions. Immediately, you crawled your way into his lap, hands rubbing up and down his arms and shoulders soothingly.
“Hi, sweet pea,” he whispered, eyes falling closed from the bliss of your touch. God, he loved you.
“Sarah told me a secret today,” you whispered back, hands still moving.
“Oh yeah? What’s that?”
Your smirk was evident in your voice as you said, “She told me how you can play guitar and, I couldn’t believe it, sing. What have you been hiding from me, cowboy?”
Joel’s chuckle rattled in his chest, his eyes opening to see your mischievous grin. “She said that? She must have gotten me confused with another dad.”
“Hm, I don’t think so. There’s only one Joel Miller that lives in this house.” You leaned forward, pressing a kiss to his lips gently. “What do I have to do to get a pretty boy like you to sing for me?”
Joel’s cock twitched as you uttered the words, making you smirk. “Tell you what, pretty boy,” you paused, emphasizing on the last two words. You watched his Adam’s apple bob with his hard swallow, eyes watching you carefully. “Sing a few songs for me and I’ll let you have your way with me. How does that sound?”
Joel nodded, albeit a bit frantically. He’d take you right here on this couch if it meant you’d keep calling him your pretty boy.
“Guitar is in the bedroom, s-sweet pea,” he stuttered, hands gravitating to your hips as you ground against him.
“Okay, honey.” You grabbed his hands as you stood, leading him up the stairs to his bedroom. You’d changed into one of his flannels after Sarah had gone to bed, the fabric almost reaching your knees as you walked.
You hadn’t planned on teasing Joel to death, truly. But when he walked in after a long day with exhaustion exuding from his body, you figured he could use a little fun before the weekend began in earnest.
When you reached the bed, you settled yourself in the middle, legs open and on display while Joel pulled the guitar case from under his bed.
Joel was nervous as he clicked open the case, pulling the acoustic guitar from its resting place. He hadn’t sung for anyone in a long time, anyone except Sarah of course.
His hands shook as he moved himself onto the bed next to you, guitar settled on his lap. He tested a few strums, taking his time to tune the instrument before he began.
Your voice caught in your throat at the sound of Joel’s sweet melody filled the room. His voice was soft, yet gritty as he crooned the lyrics of Garth Brooks’ “If Tomorrow Never Comes.”
If I never wake in the morning
Would she ever doubt the way I feel
About her in my heart
If tomorrow never comes
Will she know how much I loved her
Did I try in every way to show her every day
That she's my only one
Tears welled as you listened, love pouring from Joel’s soul as he went through the chorus and second verse. You laid your hand on his thigh closest to yours, watching him with soft eyes.
Though his voice is rough from lack of use, the song was beautiful and full of his love for you. He had glanced at you several times during the song, but it was your expression at the end of the song that gave him purpose.
He’d barely put the guitar aside before his hands were on you, lips chasing yours. You met him with equal force, bounding into his lap. His hands roamed your bare skin under the flannel you wore, finding purchase on your thighs as they straddled his hips.
“That,” you moaned as his lips explored the skin down your neck and chest. “Was the most beautiful thing anyone has ever done for me.”
With your hands tangled in his brown curls, Joel explored lower, leaving marks along your collarbones and a particularly harsh bruise on your left breast. You gasped as his teeth sunk into your sensitive skin, the feeling soothed moments later with his gentle kisses to the area.
Carefully Joel flipped you onto your back, undoing the buttons on the flannel as he moved down your body, head hovering just above the place you wanted him most.
“Please,” you breathed out, hand tugging at his hair. “P-please Joel, right there.”
Joel placed a kiss to your inner thigh, smirking into your skin as he tugged your underwear down your hips and tossed them behind him.
“Are you going to be good for me, darling?”
“S-so good…I’ll be so good.” Joel nudged your clit with his nose as you spoke, your hips bucking up in response.
You felt his fingers first, sliding between your folds to collect the wetness there. He used his free hand to hold your thighs apart as his tongue found your clit, tracing skilled circles around the bundle of nerves.
“Oh, fuck,” you muttered, back arching from his touch.
Joel made a muffled sound of approval, continuing to devour your clit while two of his fingers inched into your entrance. You mewled at the feeling of his hands slowly spreading you open, his fingers curling just right to hit your most sensitive spot.
Joel ate you out like a man starved, his fingers finding an equal rhythm to match his pace against your cunt. You tugged on his hair in response, heavy moans escaping from your mouth.
He pulled his mouth away from you slightly, hand continuing his movement as he said, “shh, darling. We don’t want to wake Sarah now. Be good for me and stay quiet sweet pea.”
His fingers curled in that moment, your frantic nodding the only response you could give him as he continued his assault on you.
With his mouth back on your clit, fingers continually reaching the spot that made you see stars, you were close.
“Oh fuck, Joel,” you choked, your free hand grabbing the sheets for purchase. “Joel I’m gonna,” you groaned as he hummed against your skin, somehow moving faster than he had before.
Joel coaxed your orgasm out of you at a deliberate pace, your wetness covering his chin and beard as you came undone underneath him.
He loved watching you come, the way your back arched and heels dug into the mattress. How you closed your eyes, groaning in pleasure as you called out his name. He loved knowing that he was the only one who could bring you to this state, panting and writhing from his touch.
He carried you through your orgasm, mouth sucking at your clit until you couldn’t take it anymore, a hand gently shoving him away from over sensitivity. He slowly pulled his fingers from within you, raising them to his mouth and sucking your wetness from them, eyes watching you watch him.
When he was finished, he trailed kisses back up your body, leaving a tender one on the bruising spot he’d left on the side of your breast before he reached your mouth again.
You kissed him lazily, tasting yourself on him as you explored his mouth with your tongue. Joel moaned in return, a hand finding purchase on your hip.
You tugged on his shirt, raising it over his head and tossing it aside before you began to work on his jeans when you heard a gentle knock on the door. “Daddy?”
You paused your movements, watching Joel as he sat back on his heels. “Just a sec, baby girl.”
You squeezed his hand as he moved off of the bed, using the flannel still hanging on your body to wipe your wetness from his chin before he walked to the door.
You sat up also, taking the few steps to Joel’s closet to find some more respectful clothing to put on for Sarah to see.
Joel opened the door gently, peering down at his young daughter in the darkness of the hallway. “What’s wrong, baby girl? We didn’t wake you, did we?”
She shook her head, tears welling in her eyes. “I-I had a nightmare, daddy.”
“Oh darling,” Joel fell to his knees in front of Sarah, pulling her into his chest. “It’s alright, you’re safe now.
You heard her sniffle before she mumbled, “Can m-mommy come lay in bed with me for a while?”
You stilled, your heart warming at her words. She’d never called you mom before and you’d never expected it in a million years.
Joel felt your hands on his shoulders as he stuttered, “mommy?”
Sarah nodded, looking up at you expectantly. “You’re going to be my mommy now, right? I…I overheard you and uncle Tommy talking about it the other day daddy.” Her eyes drifted down to Joel’s and back up again, a pout forming on her mouth. “Can you come lay with me and tell me one of those stories? I really like it when you tell me stories before bed.”
“Of course, honey. Why don’t you go get settled and I’ll be right there, okay?”
Sarah nodded, giving her dad one last hug before she made her way back down the hallway and into her room.
You leaned down on Joel’s shoulders then, wrapping your arms around his neck. “Mommy, huh?”
“I, uh…” Joel was glad you couldn’t see his face, red creeping up his neck and into his cheeks and ears. He hadn’t bought a ring yet, had barely started thinking about it when Tommy mentioned the idea a few weeks previous. How Sarah heard the conversation, he had no idea.
“Don’t worry,” you whispered against his skin. “Your secret is safe with me. Why don’t I go and get Sarah back to sleep and then you and I can continue what we started in the shower, hm?”
“Sure, darling, whatever you say.” He could feel your smile on his neck, your lips brushing against his ear.
“I love you, pretty boy.”
“And I love you, sweet pea.”
#Joel miller#joel miller x reader#joel miller x fem!reader#joel miller x you#joel miller smut#sub!joel#no outbreak joel#the last of us#the last of us fic
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Rivalry [C.G]
Carl Gallagher x Male Reader
Requested // Request Rules
(Via Message)
"Hey! I don't know if you're taking requests but maybe we can get another Carl X male reader? I'd really appreciate it since all the ones I can find aren't the best or have certain problems."
A/n - Yes actually. I always take requests. But I'd love to make more male reader fics so yes! Thought it'll take a hot minute since your like third in line 😅 (I do my requests in order~)
"Thank you so much! Could it perhaps be a angst rivalry one shot? :)"
A/n - YES, of course, lol! Really hope this didn't disappoint! 😅🙏
Submitted by @masonvoices
Warning! Cussing, Small spoilers, Weapons being activated, Pranks, Targeting, Vandalizing, PTSD episode
Word Count: 1,968
[Enemies to Lovers]
Shameless Masterlist
Fandom Masterlists
/"Talking"//Thinking//Muttering-Whispering/
***Narrator's Pov***
You were at school doing your usual routine. Every day before school started, you would walk into the boy's bathroom and enter the biggest stall. There you would wait for the biggest dummies in school. There they would give you the money you asked for in exchange for the homework you did for them.
"Thanks again Y/n."
"Yeah, no problem, now pay up." You said, opening your hand, gesturing for him to put money in it.
"Right; how much money do I owe you, now?"
"Well considering how this took me about an hour and I had to write 2,000 words within one night, I'd say 20 dollars."
"20 dollars?! Last time it was ten-!"
"Yeah, well, last time it was a word puzzle. Now hand over my money or you aren't playing this season."
"Okay, okay, here." He gives you the money. "Though, if this doesn't give me an A you're going to be in a world of hurt Y/n." He gave you a death glare and walked away.
Yeah, sure whatever.
That's how it would usually play out however... Today was a little different. Today you had someone in your spot.
Carl Gallagher.
He used to be a regular no-good bully in school, but ever since he came back from juvie, he became an 'all-that gangster man.' Or what people called him- White Boi Carl.
Now you and Carl never really had a good history together. It all started back in elementary school, during lunch. Now Carl's family wasn't wealthy at all, and well, he barely had anything to eat; meanwhile, you had a full plate. Of course, school food is disgusting, but Carl was starving, so he had the bright idea of fighting you for your own food.
Of course, you didn't have any of it and told him to leave you alone, but that only fueled Carl's hunger. You two ended up in detention for a week. You got a huge scolding from your parents, and you were mad. You were mad at the school for punishing you even though you were the victim, you were mad at your parents for not hearing your side of the story, and most importantly you were mad at Carl for putting you into this pointless situation that ended up not helping either of you. What's worst was that it could have all been avoided if only he asked.
Before, you didn't even know he existed, but after that, it felt as if everything you did, he would do better. Of course, you outshined him during school curriculums, but when it came to school activities, he was the star.
And this frustrated you. Now your family wasn't very welcoming when it came to losers. In fact, your family lived on the wealthy side of town. Each member of your family shined in their careers, and they shined brighter in school, each graduating as valedictorians.
So, you had a huge tradition to uphold, and you hated it. What's worst was that you were born a boy. Thus, automatically making you a sports star in your family's eyes. It should have been easy, if only Carl wasn't there.
Sometimes you felt as if he did things to annoy you on purpose...
Like today-
"Carl, why are you here?" You asked, annoyed. "You know this is my spot."
"Oh, is it now?" He said as he loaded a gun.
"Yeah. It's been my spot since day one." You flapped around a few papers. "You should know this! I helped you a few times!"
"Yeah, well, I won't be needing your help anymore." He said with a smirk on his face. "Once I get my gun-selling business going, no one will remember you because no one will need you to do their homework anymore. Because there will NO LONGER BE HOMEWORK ANYMORE!" He said that so proudly, as if it would actually work.
"That will never wor-"
"Uhhh- is this the place where we can buy... uh- you know... guns?" A random guy asked, interrupting you.
"You got to be kidding me." You muttered as Carl smirked at you as you walked away.
The next day!~
***Y/n's Pov***
You found a huge line to the boy's bathroom... What's worst was that even the girls were in on it now.
Are you fu*king serious?! Oh, it's on Gallagher!
From that point on, your high school feud came rising to its peak.
Alright. If he's going to sell guns in my spot, then I'll make him regret selling those guns to everyone. It's a good thing I'm rich... it really helps to connect with people. You smirked evilly as you thought up your evil plan to get him back.
The next day!~
You spent the whole day yesterday thinking of the greatest way to get him back without hurting him; of course, you wouldn't want to damage your high school credibility, after all.
It was honestly a simple plan. You wanted to show him that there was a reason why people shouldn't bring guns to school...
Time skip!~
It was during lunch. You made sure to go in extra early to set everything up but of course, you didn't want everything to set off before Carl and Nick got there so you waited a little bit before placing your trap. This would only work once after all.
You waited for Carl to get comfortable sitting at his lunch table. You also made sure Nick was in sight, too; you didn't want him to spoil everything.
You wanted to make sure he and his buddy didn't spot you as you walked around the entire lunchroom, sprinkling your tiny little bombs everywhere, preparing for a catastrophe that was about to unfold as the student body left the lunch line.
Then you sat there thinking to yourself- Man, if this works... You couldn't help but giggle thinking about it.
What was best about it was that everyone was secretly on edge. Waiting if their enemy would make a move on them.
The best part was everyone was rushing to their tables, so there were huge crowds coming out of the lunch line at once, and then- BANG!
Tiny little explosions popped everywhere around everyone's feet. Immediately after, everyone grabbed their guns out, pointing them at one another. Triggers were pulled but luckily no one got shot.
You just sat there all smug-like drinking your tea as you stared at Carl and his table with amusement. You found it enjoyable seeing his shocked face. The best part about it was that you managed to capture a picture of him jumping a little when everything set off. Of course, the picture was blurry but that didn't matter.
And then he saw you. He was completely baffled at the situation, but when he saw you smirking, he knew that was your doing.
He then said something to Nick, but you couldn't tell what as he got up and left.
Time Skip!~
The next day Carl wasn't in your spot. You were glad to see that you scared him off. You weren't entirely sure if he stopped selling guns in school, but you getting your spot back was good enough for you.
And with that, you grabbed onto the toilet lid but found that it was stuck. You then pulled a little harder only to find gum... a lot of gum. It covered the entire lid and it stringed onto the wall. It was a huge, disgusting, sticky mess.
That bastard!
He knew how much of a germaphobe you were. Always a stickler for messy things, so obviously, this was going to bug you, hard.
But that wasn't even the cherry on top... You turned around to see the inside part of the stall door. You didn't even realize it before when you walked in, but it was a huge graffiti drawing of a di*k. It had the saying- "BANG!"
You were completely livid... shacking with frustration, your face turned red with anger.
When will he ever learn!
And then a big dummy came in. "Woahh... What happened here? Wait, are you getting bullied-?!" He said, holding in a laugh.
"Get the f*ck out of my way!" You said, pushing past him. Now feeling somewhat embarrassed.
If he wants to play dirty, so be it.
The next day!~
You waited around the corner, hiding from Carl. You were excited about this one. If he was going to embarrass you in front of that underling, then you wanted to do the same, but bigger.
Then, you saw Carl walking with Nick from the far side of the hall. It didn't take them long to get to his locker. You leaned in closer to get a bitter look. It was somewhat hard since most people were getting in the way. But then you heard that ruffed voice squeal. This caught the attention of the student body as they all gathered around the sight.
You had to fight your way through only to see Carl and Nick covered in silly string. That part you expected, but Nick punching Carl's locker over and over, causing a dint was not what you expected at all. You couldn't help but laugh in the background as the rest of the student body joined in. A few even started to video the whole thing as Carl struggled to get the silly string out of his hair. Meanwhile, Nick continued to punch the life out of that locker...
It was a huge fiasco. It took three male teachers to get Nick to stop punching that poor locker. Carl couldn't even get him to stop.
It must have been the PTSD... You thought.
You then walked off; however, in the corner of his eyes, Carl saw you and then chased you down as the bell ranged.
Small time skip!~
You were now behind the school building, under the football bleachers. This was the place where you'd always go to hang out during study hall. Barely anyone ever went under there, so it was the best place for you to relax without getting bothered, until-
"What the he*l was that?!" An all-too-familiar voice yelled from behind you.
You turned around to see Carl with his angry face.
"What? Are you asking for tips or something? Cause last time I checked, you're not really good at making thin-"
"No!" He interrupted you walking closer. "I mean you gave Nick a PTSD episode!"
"Well, what do you want me to say? Sorry? I didn't plan that you know!"
"Well, you should apologize!" He was all up in your face now. "But not to me, TO HIM!"
"WELL, THAT WOULDN'T HAVE HAPPENED IF YOU DIDN'T START THIS!"
"Start this? You're the one who started this! With all your prep talk bull*hit! I just wanted to keep people safe!"
"Safe! You think it's SAFE to let EVERYONE young, dumb, individual hold a deadly weapon IN SCHOOL!?" You yelled back. "The only thing dangerous in this is YOU!" You pushed him away from you. "Every time I see you, you're always beating someone up!? I MEAN, SERIOUSLY! WHAT THE HE*L DID THEY DO TO-"
"THEY WERE TALKING SH*T ABOUT YOU!!!" Carl pushed you against the wall but then realized what he had just said. His face quickly turned red, and you just stood there, shocked. Soon after, your face turned red too... and then you didn't even know what possessed you to do this, but you pulled him in for a kiss. He kissed you back... and you two both slowly pulled away in shock.
"Uh... ummm..." You were completely speechless.
Carl then whipped his lips. "Well then, I suppose it's my turn to get you back. Right?" He said, smirking.
You blushed. "Re-Right."
A/n
I REALLY HOPE THIS DIDN'T DISAPPOINT! I would have added more scenarios, but I didn't want this to get too long.
#shameless#carl gallagher#carl gallagher x reader#carl gallagher x male reader#carl x reader#carl x male reader#male reader#reader insert#fanfiction#fanfic#shameless fans#request#requested#lgbtq+
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