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#Not just rent free really i think i pay for it to stay there
Note
Okay here's one. I really dont think I'm the asshole but my ex sure does.
AITA for refusing to buy my partner a jar of pickles?
So this story has like, a little background and some confounding factors i think but i really could go both ways on whether i was the asshole.
Ill start with both my ex (21nb) and i (23f) had severe mental health issues and were working on treatment when we were together. Theyd been in and out of inpatient stays throughout our three year relationship. Towards the Day of Pickles, i had my first inpatient stay where i got help i desperately needed to keep myself safe. This happened to be about a week after my 23rd birthday, but about two and a half weeks before their 21st birthday.
Anyway, at that time i had just gotten out of the hospital and started a new job at Joanns Fabrics (i outlived that retail fucker and im proud of it). I had been unemployed for the previous year and a half because of the pandemic and so the retail job was really my saving grace to have some sort of income to buy gas and groceries. My parents let me live rent free with them in their basement but i spent a LOT of time essentially squatting at my ex's dorm because my situation with my parents was not great.
Now my ex was also being financially abused by their mom so they had a monthly "allowance" of 200$ (of their own money they made at their on campus job) and no access to their bank statements. So i spent a lot of my own money on gas and groceries for both of us, and anything we wanted to do for fun, like visit the city. Without an income, this was SUPER stressful for me and i spiraled pretty hard with feelings of worthlessness and hopelessness. Supporting two people, even minimal living expenses, on an income of exactly 0$ is the WORST.
Anyway, i got out of the hospital and pretty much immediately went back to picking up as many shifts as i could at work because id been on staff for all of two weeks before hospitalization. Knowing retail, i was probably on the precipice of losing hours or being fired altogether.
My ex wanted me to take time off to celebrate their 21st birthday (they didnt celebrate my birthday that year) and travel to see their family and drink etc. I got scheduled for an inconvenient time. I would have to miss their birthday if i didnt find someone to cover. I managed to switch shifts with another coworker who was nice enough to let me have her morning shift, so i was able to at least travel separately and be a little late to dinner.
The night of their birthday my ex wanted to get drunk and so we went to the liquor store. Now im generally pretty picky about alcohol but if i get anything special i always get enough to share. Mysteriously, no one ever offers to share the expense or pay me back. So with all of 150$ in my account, i purchased enough alcohol for myself and the rest of the party, and a bottle of (cheap af) liquor for myself. I was broke af until my next paycheck and was pretty much planning on giving up meals and staying at home because the commute to work was shorter and meant less gas.
My ex picked out a jar of boozy pickles and asked if i would get it for them for their birthday. I should note that with all the stress i was under i had found a birthday present for them but hadnt actually placed the order (was waiting to get paid). I also didnt lie to them about this and had told them that i hadnt gotten their birthday present yet. They were upset by this and told me they felt like i didnt care about them, to which i snapped and raised my voice a little.
I gave them a bit of a reality check. I told them in no uncertain terms that i was under a lot of stress, from nearly killing myself to being flat broke with little to no help from my family other than a conditional roof over my head, ordering their birthday present wasnt super high on my list of things to do and that i knew what i was going to get them and that i intended to order it as soon as i had the money to do so. After years of the sole attention being focused on keeping them alive, i needed some support and acting like i didnt care completely ignored EVERYTHING i did to keep us both afloat.They cried and played the victim as they tended to do and i was too stressed to do anything but be angry.
So when they asked for the pickles i told them no. I have NOTHING left in my bank account, and anything that was in my account was already allocated for something else.
They told me i was being selfish for buying myself alcohol on THEIR birthday, not even getting them a present, yelling at them, and then refusing to buy the one thing they asked for, especially after i refused to take off work the day before to hang out with them and their family. In front of our friends.
I told them that i was purchasing the alcohol for the whole party, that the present had slipped my mind, and that they were accusing me of not caring about them when i snapped. Then i walked out.
My bff went outside to help me cool down and i told him what was going on and how stressed i was and he said that he agreed with me, it was childish to expect me to pay for everything with no help from anyone and then act like im unreasonable for having to put limits on what i can purchase.
My ex ended up getting so pissed by all of this they broke up with me two days later, saying that their birthday was the final straw for them after I'd been so codependent and relying on them too much to survive.
I think its all ridiculous given all of the stress factors i was dealing with at the time. I feel like we're all entitled to the occasional emotional outburst/bouts of forgetfulness when we're stressed. But my ex seems to think im a selfish asshole. We've been no contact for the last two years so this isnt like a pressing concern or anything but it does make me roll my eyes occasionally.
So tumblr, aita?
(Btw im also much more financially stable now that I'm fully and properly medicated and away from them.)
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radio-writes · 2 months
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Your Place in the Eyes of a God
Synopsis: You thought yourself oh so lucky that the demon who owned your soul was charming and kind.
Most people just had monsters ordering them about, at least your owner Alastor saw you as a lovely companion.
Warnings: Implied abusive relationship, power imbalance
Tags: Relationship can be read in any way; Alastor x Reader; gn!reader
MDNI
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Being under contract, you weren't exactly overjoyed at the fact that you didn't own your own soul, but at least your contractor wasn't a monster, right? At least he was sweet, and funny, and charming.
And oh was he charming.
That is how your soul ended up chained to his after all.
He was always so kind to you. He treated you as if you were a friend—a person.
He had taken you out for meals; showed you off from time to time. He had adored every single gift you ever gave him. He had always asked you to smile because he just found you oh so
"Lovely," He said.
And it filled your head with clouds every single time. His soft compliments never failed to make you forget where you actually stood. 
So, you never really expected things to change so quickly. So drastically.
You desperately slapped your hands over your mouth, clasped tight against your lips to silence even the smallest whimpers that threatened to slip out. You pressed against the wall, hiding, maybe if even hoping that it would open up and swallow you whole. Take you some place else—anywhere else—but here.
You watched with wide, teary eyes, unable to look away.
It was hard for you to connect the charming man you fell for with the nightmare of a creature you saw looming over Husk. 
That thing that threatened to rip the poor man's soul apart couldn't possibly be your Alastor, right? There was no way that was your sweet, funny, charming Alastor. 
But those hands that yanked at the chain were unmistakably the same ones that gently combed through you hair at night. 
That smile he held while he threatened the man was unmistakably the same one you woke up sweetly to almost every morning.
That voice, albeit distorted more than usual by static, promising wicked acts, was unmistakably the same voice that softly greeted you good morning, asking if you had a good rest.
There was no mistake. There was no denying it. 
"Understood," You barely hear Husk's frightened response.
"Lovely," Alastor praised before he left Husk shaking on the ground by his feet.
You felt your heart sink immediately. 
Lovely. The word echoed in your head, your blood now ran cold.
Lovely. The mockery, the disdain, the obvious threat to obey him or else. You didn't think such a simple word could hold so much malice. 
"I can't wait to wear that new necklace you got for me!"
"I got you this tie because it just seemed like it was your style!"
"Of course, I'm smiling! I'm with you, aren't I?"
You didn't notice when your knees finally gave away under you. You didn't notice when you started crying. Your body simply crumpled to the floor as you continued to press your hands against your mouth, silencing the sobs that ripped through you. 
Alastor had already left. You didn't need to hide around the corner anymore. You were safe now. 
No. Have you ever truly been safe?
Because what was his response? What did he say every time you followed his requests? Every time you excitedly handed him whatever trinket you thought he'd like? Every time you smiled for him?
Lovely. The word rang in your ears.
Lovely.
It wasn't a compliment, you realized.
It was never a compliment. It was a praise. A praise for being such a good, obedient pet.
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tqmies · 5 months
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In Disguise
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Description. Desperate and broke, your trio of nerdy friends offer you a place to stay until you get back on your feet. Things are normal at first until you abruptly come across a camera tripod facing Doyoung's bed. Were your awkward friends really just camboy's in disguise?
Pairing. Kim Doyoung x Yuta Nakamoto x Kim Jungwoo x Fem Reader
Genre. SMUT, Camboy!AU, College!AU, Roomates! MDNI!
Warnings. Foursome (Do I even have to say it?), Unrealistic depictions of sex overall, A little MxM action, Fingering, Oral, Condoms taken off, Plan B mentioned, Voyeurism, Creampie, Degradation, Praise
Word count. 13K (oh...)
Note: This was supposed to be out ages ago but I'm proud (not rlly) to present this mess of a wet dream!
"You have no idea how grateful I really am." You state, placing down your last box into the vacant room. You sigh in relief as your back was literally killing you too much to drag another box up. And that was that the boys had helped you with a majority of it.
"You've said it a million times, I think we know." Yuta teases, opening the box on your bed as he shuffles through it. It was old books you had brought from your place, well a few of the tons you had. Most of them had to go into storage due to lack of room at your newest living arrangement.
Truthfully, you felt really bad about this whole thing, even though Yuta kept assuring you it was alright, all the boys did. But something felt terrible about rooming with your friends for free, and kicking Yuta out of his room at that.
The boys didn't want you to feel weird about sharing a room, so Yuta slept in the same room as Jungwoo for the time being, and that made you feel even worse.
"You can have your room back, I promise I can sleep on the couch."
"Then where would you put your stuff?"
And you had pretty much lost the argument then and there, but you were determined to make up for rent in other ways. You'd clean, do laundry, and cook a few of the meals you had mastered. You could buy groceries and maybe even pay the water bill every once in a while. Not that you planned to stay here for long, only until you found another job, seeing as the one you had rapidly started laying people off.
Which brought you back to square one, Yuta’s bed.
Not like that, get your mind out of the gutter!
"I'm home!" Jungwoo announces as you hear the front door shut, his loudness already alerting you. You heard the loud clank of his keys on the counter, and his footsteps making their way towards you.
"We just finished bringing all the boxes up." Doyoung comments, giving Jungwoo a much deserved side eye.
"Oh I made it just in time then."
Jungwoo came bearing gifts though, handing out bottles of water to you guys. "I got them from one of the tents on campus, here's a shirt too!"
And before you know it, you're being hit in the head with the shirt Jungwoo threw at your face. You throw it off as you jokingly threaten him. "I'm going to crack your glasses in half Kim Jungwoo."
The male cowers in fear as he scurries off to his room, shouting behind his shoulder. "Do you guys wanna see what I'm working on?"
Doyoung jumps up, always eager to divulge in Jungwoo's nerdy projects. "Sure."
"I'm designing a supersonic VTOL fighter jet!" The engineering major says, lugging his laptop towards you all, showing you some prints on his screen. They're blueprints and sketches, and random little notes on the side, but you really can barely tell what you're looking at.
It's not that you were dumb, you were actually a very decent student. But the men in the room with you? Jungwoo was a mechanical engineering major, which said enough. Yuta was pre-med studying to be a doctor, and Doyoung? He's here on a full ride scholarship studying computer science.
So, for lack of better words, you were the dumbest in the room.
Not that you cared anyways, the boys never made you feel less than or anything because of your simple major. You also took pride in it, sure you weren't designing future airplanes or developing software, but it was enough for you.
"Looks cool, but you should widen the wingspan, I see possible blockage through the-" Doyoung starts on with his commentary.
"Yuta! Do you want to help me start cooking?" You ask, the male seemingly uninterested in the plane, and you could relate. He nods and follows you to the kitchen, adjusting his frames.
After checking their fridge for ideas, you start filling a pot with water to boil some pasta in, directing Yuta to start chopping up some garlic. He follows directions well, as one would expect, and does as he's told.
"How did your mid-term go?" Yuta breaks the silence, referring to the grueling test he had helped you with.
"Fine, I got an 80." You reply, measuring out more pasta.
Yuta raises a brow as he places the knife down. "An 80? But we studied all week."
"Yeah but some of the questions were hard, I didn't remember." You say, and you were truly satisfied with your grade. Sure you had studied, but not everyone retained information as easily as your friends, and they were still having trouble learning that you weren't going to get a 100 points every time.
Yes the boys had extreme book smarts, but they lacked a little street smarts sometimes. They were less empathetic and more clear cut, but you knew they meant well. Though it didn't mean their lack of social cues hurt any less though.
Sometimes you wonder how you had even befriended them. Especially Doyoung, who was usually no nonsense and short worded on campus. But it could all be traced back to Jungwoo.
It was back in freshman year, and on your very first day of class. You had rushed in, confused to see that they had already started without you, which was weird seeing as your class wasn't supposed to be in session for another thirty minutes. You had just waved it off as an accident and sat down, right next to Jungwoo.
During a break, he had introduced himself and asked you if you were excited for Math 2414, and inquired about what your major was.
That was when you realized in horror that you were in Calculus, and not Pre-calculus. No wonder they had already begun, it was the wrong class! And you were not trying to take anything beyond what was required for your degree. "So this isn't pre-calculus?"
"No, I took that in high school! You didn't get that out of the way already?" He had asked, and just then did you realize what kind of person you were dealing with.
You had explained the situation to Jungwoo to which he was really understanding, offering to show you your actual classroom for your next class day. You had agreed, and then by some coincidence, you had run into Jungwoo a few days later. Catching up with him and mentioning you were having trouble with a certain concept already, to which he had offered his help.
You had started having sessions regularly, and Jungwoo had invited you to study with his group of friends, which is where you met the others.
Despite them being a little intimidated by you (And vice versa), you had all got along well, and you were thankful for that. Despite not having great social skills, they were actually a lot less complicated to deal with. They spent a majority of their time studying or doing school work, burying their noses in books. And if not? Then they're playing a computer game Doyoung designed, or testing if Jungwoo's rocket model could fly in the middle of a JCPenny parking lot.
They didn't have a lot of drama either, and you were sure they'd be simple enough to live with. Come to think of it, it's always been tidy whenever you've visited. Jungwoo's bed was always made and Doyoung's desk always clean. Yuta's was exceptionally organized too, even donning some expensive looking anime figures in displays on his shelf.
They were such nerds.
You snort to yourself as you pour the sauce onto the plates, food ready to be eaten. Funny enough, you hadn't even had to call the boys. Yuta had helped you but Doyoung and Jungwoo had hounded the kitchen counter and talked your ear off, both excited for a home cooked meal. Apparently, none of them could cook very well and they usually opted for take out, so this was a relief.
"You guys literally had all the ingredients already." You giggled as you sat down on the small table they had in their apartment.
Jungwoo shakes his head. "Doesn't matter if you don't know how to make anything out of them."
"Thank you by the way, this is really good." Doyoung nods, and by the way he scarfed down half of it already, you'd say he's telling the truth.
"Slow down, you'll choke." Yuta says concerned before his expression changes into a different one. "Wait, you should choke! I can finally practice my CPR on a real person!"
"Well if you haven't practiced on a human yet, I don't think I can trust you." Doyoung shoots him a glare.
"You're hindering my first-aid progression." Yuta narrows his eyes as he takes a bite of his food. The air grows quiet as you voice out what had been weighing on your mind.
"So, any plans for tonight?" You ask, wondering what you're going to get up to a Saturday night. You had a long week, especially since you had woken up on Monday to an eviction notice, so you'd say you could use some time out.
"Hm? Probably start looking over my lobotomy notes for my lecture next week." Yuta responds, earning a chorus of acknowledgment from the other males.
"O-okay, Doyoung?" You ask, but you think you can already guess too.
"I'm beta testing this program my friend just finished, probably'll take me all night." He speaks, attention on his food.
You deflate, looking towards Jungwoo. "Nice, and you?"
"Putting my blueprints into a 3D maker and drafting up a scale model of it." He says, and you take note of how he looks excited about it.
This was quite a turn from what you were used to, you had to remind yourself that these weren't your typical college guys. Yet, you could feel your left eye twitching slightly. "Guys! It's a Saturday night."
"Mhm?" Doyoung replies, his eyebrows furrowed, like the day didn't change anything.
You scoff, "So what, no frat parties? No bar hopping?"
You're met with blank looks, the men looking utterly confused as Jungwoo shakes his head, unfamiliar with both scenes. "No?"
You sigh, facing the fact that you're going out solo. You could probably text a few of your other classmates to meet up wherever you went.
"You guys do that, I'm gonna go get laid tonight." You shrug, getting up to put your dish in the sink. "Yuta you can sleep in your bed if you want."
"Wait- Where are you gonna go?" Jungwoo asks, following you to the kitchen with furrowed brows.
You shrug. "I don't know, maybe a club? Don't worry about me, I'll be fine. If I get home before morning then I'll just crash on the couch."
"If?!" Jungwoo's eyes widen at the prospect of you being out all night.
You place a hand on his shoulder. "I have a key, don't wait up."
And he stands there shocked, the other two watching as you head to your room to shower and change your outfit. You had a long night ahead of you.
Even afterwards, when you had stepped out in
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You try your best to quietly open the front door, met with only pitch black darkness as you assume everyone was asleep. It was two in the morning, and in their defense, you did tell them not to wait up.
Slipping your heels off, you step quietly towards the couch. You peel your tight dress off and realize you have nothing to change into, and you weren't going to wake Yuta to just grab a shirt. Luckily for you, there was a blanket you could cover yourself with, so you discarded the bra as well, thankful that at least you had worn shorts under your dress tonight. You sigh as you lay down, head still spinning as you come down from earlier.
You had succeeded in your quest of getting laid, thoroughly being manhandled by a guy named Mingyu who went to a neighboring university. The sex was actually pretty decent, but it could've been better. You had wanted someone to bend you into a pretzel and fuck you until your legs were rendered useless for the next week. And he just couldn't provide that. Maybe you'd have to trust in your rainbow dildo from now on.
You brush the thoughts to the back of your mind as you finally find sleep, eyes fluttering shut.
You swear, it felt like you were asleep for all of two seconds when you hear the blaring alarm clock from one of the rooms. Followed by the sound of things being knocked over.
Rubbing your eyes as you sit up, hangover hitting you hard, but your eyes are drawn to frantic looking Yuta running around the apartment out of his room. He moves over a few things on the dining table quickly and you watching confusion.
"Where are they?" He mutters to himself, throwing some things in the kitchen around as well.
Sitting up, you rub your eyes as your vision adjusts. "What're you looking for?"
"Just my- Oh, where is your shirt? Why are you naked?" He rambles, covering his eyes as he turns around.
You hadn't even noticed that the blanket you used to cover yourself all night had slipped down, accidentally revealing at least part of your boobs to Yuta. "I slept like this because I didn't want to barge into your room to grab a shirt, sorry. I'll go do that now!"
You get up and scramble to the room, feeling so shitty at making Yuta uncomfortable. Opening the drawer, you slip on the first shirt that's there. You don't even look at it before you're rushing out and apologizing profusely to Yuta. "It's only my first morning here and I've already flashed you."
"Is that my shirt?" He asks, eyes wide and your look down to confirm that it was, in fact, Yuta's shirt.
"Oh! And I stole your shirt, I'll wash it and put it back! I really am sorry, I'm just so hungover right now." You hang your head in shame as the words slip out.
"No! No, really it's fine." Yuta dismisses as he waves his hands. "I found my keys so I have to go now, see you when I get back!"
And with that, he's out the door, face tinted red.
God, you were a fool! Sighing in defeat, you make your way to your room, slipping off the shirt and trading it out for one that was yours.
What you didn't know was that Yuta was still standing on the other side of the front door, mind reeling as he replays the mental image of your nipples peaking through the fabric of one of his shirts. He didn't think you'd be giving him this much trouble already! It was the first morning!
Back inside, you're gathering clothes to take a shower. Jungwoo opens the door to his room, unexpectedly rushing out as well, saying he had somewhere to be as he's unable to meet your eyes. You had no idea everyone would be so busy this morning. Was it usually like this? You shrug, too tired and ready to be met with steaming hot water as you bid him goodbye.
After your shower, you not surprised to see Doyoung up as well, sitting near the kitchen as he munches on a banana. You can see his computer in front of him displaying some kind of code, and he doesn't look like he got a wink of sleep. Did these boys ever take a break?
"Good morning Doyoung." You yawn, making a bee line for the coffee machine. You grab a K-Cup and try to figure your way around the machine as you fail to notice Doyoung's stare.
"Oh, Morning." Doyoung finally gives a greeting back, thankful that your back is facing him right now with the way the blood was rushing to his face. Now, Doyoung wouldn't say he was a pervert or anything, but he couldn't help the way his eyes were glued to your shorts.
You break him out of his spell when you turn around, coffee mug in hand. You're frowning, "Why's everyone so busy today?"
"It's like that everyday, we rarely see each other in the mornings." Doyoung explains, keeping his composure still as he tries not to let his eyes wander. He's not stupid, he knew it'd be a little difficult to live with someone as hot as you, but he figured he could handle himself.
"Oh that's too bad, I wanted to make everyone breakfast." You speak, turning around to open the cabinets, unaware how Doyoung's eyes shot straight back to your ass. "So, how was your night?"
"I-it was alright, and yours?" He asks while he clears his throat, already semi-aware of your ventures that you had announced.
"Can't say it was any better." And you leave it at that as you sigh. What could you mean by that? Did you not get laid? With an ass like that?
"Oh.. Well, I have a meeting with my professor in twenty so I have to get going soon." He nods, and you just about lose your mind.
"On a Sunday?"
"Computers work on Sunday's too."
God, what was he on about? "Okay Doyoung, see you later then."
Weirdly, you felt the least your friends could do was amuse you. But so far, you were beginning to realize that they're likely this busy all the time, between their schooling and internship jobs, they were packed.
Speaking of jobs, it was time to start looking.
..
Eight online job applications later and you're about ready to move to the woods and start living like a cave woman off the grid. No money, no bills, and no rent. Sadly, you were too accustomed to running water to let that happen though.
So you decide to drop off an application at a promising job near you, before hitting the inevitable brick wall. You don't have a printer.
Surely one of the boys had to have one, right?
Wrong, it seemed as you looked into Jungwoo's room. It felt weird to just peep in there, but you didn't want to bother him by texting since you knew he was busy. Unfortunately, you were already aware that Yuta didn't have one either.
Which left you with peeping into Doyoung's room. Maybe if you had just, I don't know, used the printer available at your college campus, you wouldn't have discovered such a life altering sight.
Yet, for some reason, that possibility didn't cross your mind as you swung the door open. And you felt like your jaw hit the floor as you stared ahead almost immediately.
Positioned right above Doyoung's bed, was a camera.
And not just any camera, an ultra HD expensive looking one, and that said a lot seeing you knew nothing about cameras. To make matters worse, it was held by a tri-pod. Could it be any more obvious?
You close the door as you stand, feet plastered to the floor in horror. What the hell was Kim Doyoung doing with a classic porn set up in his room? Kim Doyoung?! The nerdy TA who ran from woman that were just trying to ask him class-related questions? The male who grimaced at any sight of public of public affection? The one who rolled his eyes in annoyance when others made dirty jokes?
That Kim Doyoung was making porn?
Yeah right, you could almost laugh at that.
There had to be another reasonable explanation, right? You had known Doyoung for a while now, and he definitely didn't even seem like a man who was too keen on pre-marital sex, there was just no way he was filming it.
You doubt he even watched porn, that's how busy and wound up he seemed. There was no way on this green earth that he was doing that. But that doesn't explain what the camera was doing there.
You had to find a way to connect this to his nerdy computer job or you were going to go crazy.
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You got home around five in the afternoon after dropping off the finally printed application, and picking up a few things, like toilet paper and laundry soap, that you had noticed missing around the apartment. Mostly just buying yourself time to get over the weird thoughts you were having now.
You doubt you'd be able to look Doyoung in the eye without crumbling, so you text your friend Mark if you can crash on his couch, he lives closer to campus anyways. He responds almost immediately with a sure dude, and you decide you'll stop by the house to pick up pajamas.
You don't expect anyone to be home as you unlock the door, but of course, everyone was home. All of them gathered in the living room with takeout boxes as Jungwoo spots you. He holds one up, "We didn't know when you'd be home, but we ordered for you."
You smile as you thank him, opening the box to reveal your favorite dish. You hadn't explicitly told them lately, but they had remembered? That makes your heart swell for your friends a bit as you spot Doyoung out of the corner of your eye. Oh, right.
"Actually, I have to go do this thing tonight." You lie. "So I just stopped by to get some clothes."
"Really? Is everything okay?" Yuta inquires as you nod. And it's as if there's no awkwardness from him after the incident this morning either, so you're grateful for that.
"I'm fine, I'll be home tomorrow." You explain.
"Well, could you spare a minute to eat with us?" Jungwoo pouts, and you find yourself nodding before you can stop yourself. You were always a little weak for him.
If Doyoung notices your odd behavior as you sit by him, he doesn't say a word about it. In fact, everyone seems to go about their business. Everyone filling you in on how busy their days were and asking about what you had been up to.
"Oh, I left the bags by the door, but I bought some stuff we needed."
"You're an angel." Jungwoo comments. "I was scared I was going to have to use napkins instead of toilet paper again."
"That's so gross Jungwoo." Yuta reconciles and you all laugh in agreement.
"So, you'll be gone all night then?" Doyoung asks, bringing your attention back to him. Your eyes dart to his hands, right as he twirls the noodles around his chopsticks. Sure you were still wondering a little about the camera situation, but it wasn’t like that right? Though you can’t help but notice how pretty his hands were. 
His fingers were long, and you couldn’t help but imagine how they wrapped around his own cock. If he filmed anything, would he jerk off and beg his viewers to let him cum? Or was he more dominant, shoving his thin fingers into a flashlight as he spoke nasty words, or maybe even in another girl. The visual alone is enough to get you hot and bothered. But you shake yourself out of it, this was the dorky comp-sci major you lived with, you should not be thinking about him like that.
"Yeah, I'm working on a project with Mark, figured I'd just spend the night since we have the class together in the morning." You put together, pretty impressed with how well the lie was coming out.
"Mark?" Yuta raises a brow, the name familiar to him. "Like the hockey player?"
You nod, curious. "You know him?"
"Not really, just know he's a jock."
You catch his implication. "Well, he's not like that. Plus, he's my friend so you guys shouldn't worry, not like I'm spending the night with a stranger."
Jungwoo grows uncharacteristically quiet. "Oh."
..
"So Jungwoo's being fucking weird, Doyoung might have an onlyfans, and Yuta's saw your boobs?" Mark parrots back as you two sit on his living room couch, he's shifting the lollipop in his mouth from one side to the other as he thinks. His brows furrow in concentration as he cooks up a response.
"Exactly."
Haechan, your friends roommate and fellow hockey teammate, laughs loudly as he enters the room. "And it's only your second day living with them?"
"Told you the losers would be a lot to handle." Mark shrugs, and you roll your eyes. These two didn't have the greatest impression of your other three friends, reducing them down to the nerds everyone thought they were.
"I didn't see you offering me a room," You defend. "Plus, they're super easy to live with so I don't have much else to complain about."
"You could always just share a bed with me." Haechan smirks, and you fake gag. "Your room smells like shit."
"Hey!"
"Anyways, I'd rather live with my beloved nerds than with you two sleazes." You state truthfully, scrunching your nose.
"Doyoung might be slinging his dick on camera, yet we're the sleazes?" Mark giggles, and you hit him in the arm.
"I don't think that's the case but, is there any other explanation?" You groan, stealing a chip from a bag hidden on Mark's side. He swats at your hand as you grab another one.
"He could just be into filming." Haechan offers, joining you two as he pops open a soda. And you ponder if Doyoung's ever been seen with a camera before.
You shake your head, doubting it. "He's never mentioned anything like that."
"Well running from him, and the rest of your roommates, is just going to make them think you're ungrateful. It'd be better to just confront them now and get over it." Mark advises, and the other male agrees.
Haechan places his soda down. "Why does it matter anyways? What Doyoung does in his apartment is no one else's business."
"Well-" You stop yourself as you look down. "I don't know."
"What's up?" Mark says at the shift in your attitude.
You hadn't confronted it yet, but the though of the things Doyoung did on his bed with his camera running? You hated that you wanted to see it. You hated that you ran with the implication of him having a scandalous hobby, and that you wanted a front row seat.
"I don't know, even with those wire-frame's and all, I think he's kind of cute." You admit begrudgingly, leaning back into the couch in embarrassment.
"Oh my God," Haechan sits up. "The thought of him doing that has you all hot and bothered! That's what it is, it's not even about him actually doing it, its about you thinking he is."
"And you're just having trouble grappling with your feelings." Mark shrugs as he pops a chip into his mouth, lollipop stick discarded.
You cover your face with your hands. "Stop.."
Mark sighs, throwing his hands up in defeat. "Don't hate the messenger."
"Okay sure, Doyoung's nice to look at but if anything, I'd be more into Jungwoo." You reveal, and it's true. If there's anyone in the house you'd like in that way, it'd be Jungwoo. You two just had a better connection, even if he'd be acting different lately.
"In a weird science-y kind of way?" Haechan tilts his head before groaning. "Why him when you could have the hottest frat boy on campus?"
"There you go again." You glare, knowing instantly that he was referring to Lee Jeno's crush on you. You know full well the two in front of you were rooting for their friend. They also thought you were too attractive to be hidden behind stuffy scholars all day. And sure, Jeno was sweet, and easy on the eyes, but you just weren't into him. "Stop trying to set me up."
"Worth a shot."
"Anyways, I think instead of just hiding here." Mark narrows his eyes. "You should go home and explain everything, that way you don't continue scuttling around out of nervousness."
"And admit that I thought about Doyoung in that way?" You exclaim, face palming. "Mark, that's a terrible plan."
"You don't have to say all that," Mark crosses his arms in retaliation. "Just talk about Jungwoo's behavior and clear the air with Yuta."
You hang your head in defeat. "Can I at least wait until tomorrow?"
"Nope. Now."
You plead as you caught off guard by his insistance. "But Mark-"
"He said now." Haechan repeats, grinning at your misery.
"Oh so now you two agree?" You scoff in disbelief. Those two loved to argue about everything, but of course they could team up against you.
Mark nods, pointing to the door. "Go before it's past their bedtime."
"Don't be ridiculous Mark." Haechan feigns seriousness before he chuckles. "They have to tuck each other in first."
"You two are so annoying." You mutter as you pack up your bag. Shooting the two endless glares as you slip your shoes on.
Thirty minutes later and you're at the front door of what is now considered your home. Even when it was just your friends, you had never felt this nervous entering it before. You take a deep breath in as you stick the key in the lock, ready for confrontation.
You're met with chatter in the living room, relieved that they were still up, at least you wouldn't be waking them. You close the door behind you quietly as you take your shoes off and make your way to the living room.
You take a deep breath as you round the corner. "Hey, I'm back-"
You freeze in your place at the sight before you. It seriously seemed liked your friends had been abducted by aliens. There was no way the image before you was real. Your eyes widen as your jaw slacks, "What. The. Fuck."
Your met with three pairs of eyes staring back at you, Yuta standing up from the couch first. "I-I thought you were going to be gone all night."
You stay still from shock, brain trying to come up for any reasonable explanation as to why your friends looked liked male strippers right now. "You...You're Yuta?!"
Yuta looks taken aback. "Just with a little makeup."
Just a little? Yuta looked completely transformed, his hair gelled back nicely instead of awkwardly parted down the middle. The black glasses and collard shirts traded out for thick rings and painted nails. He looked like a rock star, and was that a tattoo?
"We can explain." Doyoung awkwardly looks down. Your knocked out by the sigh of him as well. Gone is his usual stern put-together look, instead he's donning smoky eye shadow with layered gold necklaces as his dark hair messily frames his face. He's wearing a sleeveless shirt, and that catches you heavily off guard as he usually only wears loose fitting clothes. He had been hiding those toned arms the entire time?
You take a step back. "How do you plan on explaining why it looks like I just stepped onto the set of Magic Mike?"
Your eyes finally meet the quiet boy who had been on your mind recently, Jungwoo. And to say he looked stunning would be an understatement. He was wearing a cropped shirt that showcased his toned abs as he stood up, the red color of it contrasting to his skin perfectly. His eyes looked striking, and he's wearing dark makeup as well.
You'd hate to admit it, but the sight of the men had you suddenly rubbing your thighs together and trying to stop your head from spinning. What the hell was going on right now? What alternate timeline has you just entered?
"Why don't you sit?" Doyoung suggests, avoiding eye contact.
"Umm, alright." You comply, hesitating. When you look back up with expectant eyes, they start to get nervous.
Yuta sits as well, and you're trying not to drool. "Don't freak out."
You side eye him, this was an unusual reaction. "Right.."
"I'll just come out and say it," He pauses. "We're camboys."
He watches your face for a reaction but you provide none, instead choosing to have an explosion in your mind as you keep your composure outwardly. You turn to face him, calmly. "Oh."
Doyoung repeats. "Oh?"
"I don't know how I'm meant to react to this." You struggle truthfully. One, you were grappling with the explanation that you were right in your assumptions. Two, you were trying your best not to just gawk at them. "Plus, it's none of my business, I just came home to apologize."
Jungwoo furrows his brows. "To us?"
"I kind of already saw the tri-pod facing Doyoung's bed and jumped to conclusions. That's why I was acting distant, and I also flashed Yuta this morning-"
"You what?" Doyoung perks up.
"It wasn't on purpose." You wave your hands around before lowering your voice. "And I wanted to know why Jungwoo's been acting weird lately, and if I did anything wrong."
Jungwoo looks taken aback. "What? No, you didn't do anything wrong."
"Are you sure? You've been acting off since I've moved in." You respond, trying not to ogle your friends abs. It was proving to be harder than you thought as you forced yourself to look him in the eye.
Yuta and Doyoung exchange a knowing glance that you miss as Jungwoo stutters for an explanation. "I'm sorry, I've just been stressed."
And you just nod, the tense atmosphere in the room suffocating you. "Maybe I should go."
"Are you bothered?" Yuta asks, stopping you. The rest of the boys look genuinely worried, and you feel terrible. Your silence must've come off wrong.
"What? No, this is your house! You can all do whatever you want." You admit genuinely.
Doyoung shakes his head. "We could've at least let you know before hand-"
"No, really, it's fine." You reassure him as you make eye contact with the two other boys. "Also, your secrets safe with me, I won't say anything."
"We know you won't." Yuta nods. "We trust you, and we're sorry we didn't say anything sooner, we just didn't want things to change."
"Nothing has changed, alright?" You smile. "Everything's normal."
..
Everything was far from normal as the days progressed. Sure, the boys seemed a little more loose around you, knowing they didn't have to hide their nighttime activities from you anymore.
But you, on the other hand? Let's just say you were having a hard time not opening a incognito tab on your computer to search for your friends content. Though you knew their accounts wouldn't be easily traceable, likely not having their real name attached to it at all.
It still didn't stop you from wanting to look though.
"If you zone out one more time, I'm kicking you out of my apartment." Haechan voices in annoyance, noticing your lack of attention on some crazy story he was telling you today.
"Yeah, what has you so spacey?" Mark asks, returning to Haechan's bedroom with a water bottle in his hand.
They were unaware of the events, as you had kept your mouth shut, as promised. But it was beginning to grow harder to keep everything to yourself, especially with the way you'd been feeling lately. So with Mark's curious eyes on yours, the words spill out like a waterfall. You recalling everything that had happened to your closest friends, including how badly you wanted to know what the others were up to behind the camera.
Haechan looks gobsmacked, mouth agape as he takes in your words. "..Jungwoo has abs?"
"Is that all you got from that?" You voice frustratedly, they were insufferable.
"I'm never seen him in the gym a day in my life!"
"You don't go to the gym Haechan!"
"All three of them?" Mark repeats, in utter shock as well.
You nod back. "I don't know if they film together or what but-"
"You wanna see it." Haechan finishes for you. "You pervert!"
"I'm not a pervert!"
"You're a pervert. Pervert, pervert, pervert!" Haechan continues in a sing-song voice as you feel your eye twitch. You don't know why you told these two, not like they could offer any useful insight.
Before you can retaliate, Mark's shushing his friend. "I know how to fix this."
You listen because, really? How could Mark possibly know how to solve the inner turmoil brewing inside of you? What could make it all go away?
You admit. "I'm all ears."
"You need to get laid." He states, and your brows fuzz.
"Uh..." You trail, trying to figure out the nicest way to shoot him down.
"Not by us!" He responds, almost reading your mind, then turning around and pretending to puke in Haechans mini trash can. How mature. He comes back to his senses as he stands up again. "Come to a party with us and get fucked. It'll take your mind off of them, and anyways, I think this is just caused by sexual frustration."
Haechan pipes in. "He's right, you're just suffering from lack of dick."
"I slept with this dude named Mingyu like a week ago-"
Haechan stops you. "Shhh, Mark is always right! Right Mark?"
"Right!" And it's so strange how the two have been suddenly agreeing lately.
So you, almost unwillingly, find yourself attending a party with them that very night. Dressed in your tightest fitting dress and your nicest pair of lingerie. After about thirty more minutes of talking to you, they had you convinced your reeling horny thoughts were coming from sexual deprivation. You're sure they had brainwashed you, because seriously, you just had sex! This plan was dumb, but what else did you expect?
Though now, you're feeling stupid as your two friends subtly nudge Lee Jeno in your direction. God, you should've known those two were up to something.
You sip from your red solo cup as Jeno continues to shyly sell himself to you. He's telling you about his volunteer hours, his stellar sports stats, and his love for animals. If you didn't know any better, you'd say he's interviewing for a job, and not just attempting to grab a hookup.
Your heart somewhat aches for the boy, he definitely was trying to make you his girlfriend sooner or later, and it was almost sweet. But even if you weren't currently enthralled by the idea of your roommates, you still wouldn't have seen yourself giving Jeno a chance. He wasn't really your type anyways.
Jeno excuses himself to pour another drink as you shoot glares at your two friends from across the room. Not that Haechan sees it though, he's too busy trying to feel up some poor girl who fell for his pick up lines. Mark looks intimidated though!
You pull out your phone in an attempt to discourage any others from approaching you, and are met with a notification from Jungwoo. You open the message accompanied by his cute little contact photo and try not to smile.
It reads, Hey! Doyoung attempted dinner, you should come join us.
Granted, the boys had no idea where you were or that you were being forced into yet another mission, but you just stick your phone back in your purse and scan the room again.
While Lee Jeno may not have been your type, looking for something far too serious to even let you consider sleeping with him, Liu Yangyang seemed to be just what you were searching for. With your luck, he'd throw you off to the side the next morning. You're relieved by the fact that's he's not known to be one for committing.
You're about to approach him when Mark meets your eyes, sending you a silent don't, basically reading your mind. God, why did they have to play wingman? And curse Mark for reading your mind! So you stay rooted in your place as Jeno returns, handing you a drink that you won't even be drinking from.
Doyoung's dinner would probably be more entertaining that this right now. "Hey, sorry. I think I'm actually gonna head home, I'm pretty tired." You let out, interrupting whatever Jeno was saying.
There's a flash of disappointment in his eyes before he smiles. "I can drive you home."
Your eyes dart to the beer in his hand, passing him a fake smile. "I'll manage, but thank you for offering!"
You ignore the silent pleas and texts from your friends as you exit and get into your car, thankful that you hadn't taken a sip of anything at that party.
A few minutes later and you're back home, deciding to ring the door bell so you're not faced with another situation.
Yuta opens it, smiling as he welcomes you home. You grin back as you slip off your shoes, starving for whatever you could find. "Is dinner ready?"
But your question is answered as you walk into the kitchen to see instant ramen packets scattered across the counter top as Jungwoo holds a bowl, and Doyoung frantically scrubbing at a burnt pan.
Doyoung pushes up his glasses with his shoulder as he's still elbow deep in the sink. "Dinner didn't exactly go as planned."
You giggle. "I see that."
"Want some ramen?" Jungwoo perks up, gesturing his chopsticks towards you when you nod.
"Promise you'll cook for us tomorrow?" Yuta asks, watching as the charred food doesn't let up from the pan. You make a face as well as you shake your head.
"Promise," You say, swallowing your noodles as you sit next to Jungwoo. "Sorry I was out, Haechan and Mark are trying to set me up."
Doyoung somewhat stiffens at the names. "Yeah? Take it that didn't go well?"
You sigh. "Well, he's an athlete and he's nice enough,"
"But?" Jungwoo finishes, knowing you weren't done. Well, he was downright hoping something was wrong with this mystery athlete, truth be told.
Good thing he was right. "But, I don't think I'm into him."
"Why not?"
"No particular reason," You lie, managing to avoid eye contact with the men that were your roadblocks to anyone else right now. How were you supposed to manage a decent lay while thinking about the three hottest guys you've ever seen at home?
Even now, without their makeup and sultry clothing, you think they look attractive as ever. God, you had it bad. With those stupid collard shirts and wire frames, you think they've never looked better.
"I think I'm going to lay off the parties for a few days anyway, midterms are in a week." You continue, knowing the men in front of you had been preparing for them these past couple of weeks already.
"Right," Doyoung nods, sleeves still rolled up as he dries his hands. "Wanted to warn you by the way, we're going to be filming on Tuesday."
"Got it, I'll study at Mark's." You pass, already planning in your head how to get Haechan's loud mouth out of the room long enough to get work done.
Jungwoo looks bothered though. "Or you could stay?"
You look up from your bowl. "Hm?"
"I've been thinking," Jungwoo starts. "This is your place too, you should be able to go about your business while we film. It's not like I haven't done homework while Yuta recorded a fleshlight clip in the next room."
His boldness paired with his vulgar language — which you were definitely not used to — catches you off guard.
"I wouldn't want to bother-"
"No, he's right." Doyoung stops you. "We can't send you off everytime we have something to do, unless it makes you uncomfortable?"
You pause, you shouldn't even be considering this! Not just because of your lack of self control, but also, wouldn't this be dangerously pushing boundaries? "Oh but Yuta doesn't even have his own room right now-"
"Look, if Yuta ever needs to push something out, he can use my room. Or you could just come chill in mine while we wait." Jungwoo offers.
But goodness, being in the same vicinity as any of them when they're doing such sinful things? How were you supposed to hold back? You'd be expected to talk to Jungwoo while Yuta moaned up a storm in the other room?
"Oh, I don't know." You answer, wanting to drop the topic for now. It wasn't getting any easier to talk about it anyways.
"Why do you seem so nervous about it?" Yuta leans in, eyes meeting yours.
You subconsciously lean back, he was definitely onto you. Too bad it was a little hard to fake that you didn't fight the subconscious urge every past night to google their names. "Oh, uh-"
"We'll drop it," Jungwoo shoots a glare at Yuta. "Sorry."
"It's fine!" You smile, pretending to be preoccupied with your ramen. Though your mind is on anything but those stupid noodles right now.
“No we won’t.” Yuta smirks, ignoring Jungwoo entirely. “What has you so worked up, rubbing your thighs together below the table?”
You’re caught off guard at his openness. “W-what?”
“I bet it’s not that athlete, is it?” Yuta leans, tone seductive, and something you had never heard before. And you'd be lying if you said you didn't want him to bend you over the table in front of you.
You avert your eyes, wondering why everyone else had gotten quiet all of a sudden. You couldn't confront this right now, no you wouldn't! "I'll be in my room."
And with that you make a quick way for your temporary bedroom. Ignoring Jungwoo's call for your name as you close the door behind you. What the hell were you going to do now?
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Yuta knows he messed up, bad. Things had been tense in the house for the past few days, and you were more skittish than he had ever seen you. He wondered if you were spending time at Mark's place again.
That was Jungwoo's biggest nightmare, in all honesty. He wasn't sure what the nature of you and Mark's friendship was — and he didn't even want to think about it. You were gorgeous, you could have anyone you wanted! He had no doubt that your friends would fuck you if given the chance, if they hadn't already. He knows it doesn't matter who you're sleeping with, but it does make him feel jealous.
Doyoung remains indifferent, at least on the outside. He goes about his day as Yuta and Jungwoo lose their minds over how to return to their normal selves again. It affects him as well though. You were really close to all of them at one point, how had that changed in less than a week?
Doyoung just knows he wish things had went differently.
The sound of the front door opening alerts everyone in the house. Jungwoo's quick to jump up, greeting you at the front door. You smile back as you remove your shoes. You try to keep your composure as you ignore the men in front of you being dressed up. Ah, you forgot it was a filming day. "Today was so stressful."
"Really? Do you maybe wanna watch something in my room with me?" Jungwoo suggests, hoping he can attempt to ease things. "It'll help you relax."
You shrug, though you don't if you could handle the close proximity. It's already taking everything in you right now not to jump his bones in this hallway. "Why not?"
He mentally celebrates in his head, "I'll grab some chips and meet you in my room."
You nod, walking to your temporary room to change. Today really had taken a toll on you, and on top of it, you forgot you were coming home to your roommates alter-egos. Not that you were complaining, because you definitely weren't, but it had slipped your mind. At least Jungwoo wasn't being awkward anymore. Things were going back to normal, right?
You change into shorts and a simple t-shirt and make your way across the hall. You push open the door and see Jungwoo settled already on his bed, the tv already on. You and him to have movie nights in his bed during sleepovers, so this wasn't unusual. Finally, something was normal again. Even if now you were sexually attracted to him. Geez, could you get your head out of the gutter?!
You two watch the movie for a few minutes as Jungwoo starts to shift in his spot. You begin to grow concerned. "Everything okay?"
Jungwoo brushes you off. "I'm fine."
You furrow your brows. "Alright.."
It only takes a few seconds for him to break as he shoots up. He couldn't ignore it's presence, especially not with you in the room. The insinuation of the little red light on in the corner, as the two of you sat on his bed? It was taking his mind to places it shouldn't go. "I left my camera on my desk, its facing this way. Let me just put it up."
And with that he scrambles to his desk, shutting off the camera and tossing it in one of his desk drawers. He's frantic, and his mind is racing with how little you must think of him right now. "Sorry."
You shake your head. "Stop apologizing, it's fine."
Jungwoo covers his face with his hands as he leans against his desk. He breaks, "I can't keep pretending this isn't weird."
You had no idea he was losing his composure as well, you had thought you had been the only one blowing it out of proportion. But you didn't want him to feel ashamed. So you assure him, "I don't mind."
He moves his hands. "You don't feel weird?"
"Can I be honest, Jungwoo?" You ask, it was now or never. One more second of this back-and-forth and you were going to explode.
He meets your eyes. "Please?"
“It turns me on.” You blurt out, admitting the truth. And you can't believe it had came out so easily.
Jungwoo’s shocked as he fumbles over what to say next. “What?” 
It was too late to go back now, you had to say it. “I think it’s hot, Jungwoo, I think you’re hot.” 
Were his ears deceiving him? He prayed you weren't messing with him. “Really?” 
You giggle as you stand to your feet and he starts to feel stupid. “Mhm."
You continue to walk up to him as you place your hands on the desk behind him, effectively caging him between you. You had no idea where this boldness came from, but its likely he was drawing it out from you.
And he can't believe his circumstances. The girl he's been utterly in love with is leaning over him, in those tiny little shorts, telling him that he was the hot one? “So if I kissed you right now, you would-” 
You stop him mid-sentence as you bring your lips to his. It's reliving almost, the way your mouths slide together in synch. You had waited far to long for this to let him think he would take the lead. You wanted it far too badly.
He kisses you back, head dizzy with how much he wants you. Though he's laced with a feeling of uncertainty that he just can't shake off because what was this? Was this just a hook-up, oh he was getting ahead of himself. This was a kiss, who knew if you even wanted to sleep with him!?
He debates telling you right there, not letting another second go by where you don't know about his feelings. But he's scared, terrified even, of your reaction. So he savors the kiss, putting his hands around your waist to grab your hips and pull you closer together, if that was even possible.
You can feel your heart rate increasing as you lose your breath. You pull away slightly for breath as you and Jungwoo meet eyes. He's showing no signs of stopping though. Pulling you back in to meet his lips as gentle as possible, before kissing you with the hunger of a starved man.
He's devouring you, and he's not sure if he intends to stop there. He doesn't want to stop there, but he's completely blank on what you want. He separates, "We should stop."
You're hazy, drunk on the kiss as you eyes don't leave his lips. "Don't wanna,"
He stops you before you can go in again, squeezing your hips. He couldn't get enough of you, his body was craving you. "I don't know if I'll be able to control myself."
You smirk, hunger in your voice. "Then don't."
He groans, you had no idea what you were doing to him. How long he had dreamed of this moment. "I need to know what you want."
The statement has a double meaning, almost daring you to spill out about feelings that he's not even sure you had. Was he ultimately just hurting himself? Likely.
Though you only catch one meaning, "I want you inside me."
And he'd be stupid to deny you that. He tries to formulate a response but you don't give him a chance. You lean closer, brushing your sex on his semi-hard on, "Need you inside me."
"Fuck," He rasped, as he moves his knee between your thigh. You moan out in ecstasy, feeling slightly embarrassed. He had barely even touched you and you're bitching like a dog in heat.
You lick your lips. "Jungwoo, I-"
The door swings open as Yuta and Doyoung peek in. Yuta shakes his head as he crosses his arms, Doyoung standing in complete surprise. The two of them stare as if they caught you doing something illegal.
"Well, what do we have here?" Yuta speaks as he takes in the scene before him. You and Jungwoo hadn't even bothered to separate, too caught off guard to even have time to think about hiding what you were doing.
You swallow hard. "We were just-"
"Just grinding on each other like horny teenagers?" Yuta finishes, smirking as he knows he couldn't have walked in at a better moment.
"Yeah, thanks for the invite Jungwoo." Doyoung comments sarcastically, and you're left confused.
Jungwoo immediately catches on. "No that's not what we were-"
Yuta doesn't buy it. "No use in lying about it."
"I'm sorry, what?" You ask, unmoving.
"Yuta thinks we're filming." Jungwoo elaborates, sighing.
"You're not?" Yuta asks, and Doyoung looks intrigued.
You shake your head, "We were just kissing anyways."
"Jungwoo's boner says otherwise." Doyoung snorts.
Yuta crosses his arms, "Were you really gonna fuck her without us?"
The words hit you, without us? Who was us? Yuta and Doyoung?
You stutter, flabberghasted. "Y-you guy's would've wanted to watch?!"
Yuta shrugs. "I'll be honest, that's more of Doyoung's thing. He likes to watch, he's into those cuck things. I, on the other hand, would've wanted to join."
Yet again, you're phased by the casual talk of this all. A few weeks ago you never would've thought your friends were so, nasty. The guys who avidly avoided woman, the guys who go all shy when you got too close, the guys who would rather be studying than anything else. You don't think you'll ever get used to how they talk now.
Blinking, you speak. "You want to fuck me?"
Yuta brushes hair out of his face. "Are you serious?"
"W-what? Why are you acting like it's a stupid question, you guys have never shown attraction to me." You state, moving off of Jungwoo, and he winces as the loss of contact.
Doyoung groans. "I don't think we could've been anymore obvious without downright saying it."
Was that true? Had you missed all the signs? "I had no idea."
Yuta scoffs, quirking his head to the side condescendedly. "Look at her face, she's telling the truth, she really had no idea what she was putting us through. And here I thought you were being a tease on purpose."
"A tease?"
"Oh come on, flashing me. Walking around the house in tiny shorts and no bra under your t-shirts." He names and you see how that could look.
You mutter. "Flashing you was an accident."
"Well it's no accident how bad I want to fuck you." Yuta replies boldly, walking closer. "So are you in?"
Doyoung pipes up. "If you don't want to, you can walk out now. I promise, thing's wont be weird, we'll be fine."
You think over Doyoungs words for a minute, before looking back at Jungwoo. "I-"
You turn back to the other two. "I want to."
Yuta smiles, and Doyoung speaks again. "Are you sure?"
Jungwoo grabs your hand in his. "We're not trying to pressure you-"
"Jungwoo, I've wanted this for longer than you'd think." You admit, pressure off of your shoulders.
Yuta breaks the moment, pure lust in his eyes. "Get on the bed."
You do as told, laying down on the bed in excitement at the thought of what the three men are going to do to you. You had no idea what to expect.
Jungwoo settles on one side of you, rubbing you through your bottoms. “Thought you were too good for me, honestly. I’m little loser Jungwoo, and here you are, a sopping wet mess under me.” 
“Told Jungwoo I wanted to fuck you the day we met.” Yuta reveals, seated on the opposite side. Yet, you're too caught up on his words. 
“Really?”
“Yeah, baby. Told him we should get you in a little video too, what would you have said then?” He responds, and you flutter at the nickname.
“I had already thought of the title.” Jungwoo smirks. “Slutty college girl gets her tiny hole stretched by nerdy math tutors.” 
“I’d pay to see that.” Doyoung comments, eyes locked on you. 
“Of course you would.” Yuta teases, gaze full of pure lust. 
You feel fuzzy already. “I-I would’ve said yes!” 
“Are you sure?” Jungwoo asks condescendingly. Just because he wanted this as bad as you didn't mean he couldn't have a little fun. “I was just the nerd, remember? The nerd who watched you leave to get fucked by another guy while I was right here.” 
You moan out at his vulgar words going straight to your core. 
Doyoung takes a seat in the chair by Jungwoo's desk, seemingly content with watching. “We were all right here.” 
Yuta grins, hands pulling at your shirt. “I would’ve pounded you into my mattress the minute you asked.” 
You whine, the feverish desire taking over. “Wa-want that so bad.” 
“Yeah? Want me to fuck you until you can’t walk tomorrow?” 
You nod, overtaken with sheer desire.
Jungwoo suddenly leans down to capture your mouth in his, distracting how Yuta takes over and tugs your bottoms completely off. You shakily grab run your hands through his hair and he shivers when you touch him and gets slightly more aggressive with the kiss. He wants to be as close to you as he can, even if just for now.
You feel the air hit your bare cunt as you moan into Jungwoo's mouth. He smirks a little as Yuta shakes his head. "So wet just from a little kissing, who knew our friend was such a slut for us?"
You buck your hips off the bed, to which Yuta forcefully pushes your thighs back down. You're barely able to let out a yelp of surprise as the other male continues to meld his mouth with yours.
He’s clearly trying to keep the kiss going for as long as he can, he seems to be enjoying himself way too much. But you can't say you're complaining.
Jungwoo pulls off, moving his plush lips down to your neck as Yuta teasingly runs his fingers numbingly slow through your slit. "P-please stop teasing- umph!"
You're cut off as Yuta pushes a finger into you, quickly followed by another. He's agonizingly slow once again and you can barely handle yourself, "'S too much- too-"
"Oh so you want to give orders but when I follow through, now you're taking it back?" He moves his fingers inside you. "If you can't take my fingers, how are you supposed to take my cock?"
You moan at the thought of it, not knowing what he looked like under the belt should be considered pure torture, every other part of him was so alluring.
Jungwoo brings your attention back to him as he pulls your shirt up just enough to unclasp your bra, sliding both off with ease as you were too distracted to do it yourself.
"Your nipples are already so hard." He teases, though he goes to pinch one and that has you writhing. "Oh, they're even prettier than I imagined."
He continues to fondle one before putting his mouth on the other, sucking as Yuta continue to piston his fingers in and out of you, going faster by the minute.
You felt so good already, so overwhelmed that you weren't sure it could get any better, but oh were you so wrong.
You feel the familiar coil beginning to form in your stomach, unable to hold in your whines. "Don't stop, please,"
He doesn't, in fact he goes even faster. The pace matched with Jungwoo's mouth still on your boob makes you go dizzy fast.
Before you know it, you're feeling the coil snap and your release dripping out. But you were a fool if you thought they were going to stop.
Yuta continues to finger you damn near to heaven, Jungwoo's tongue jutting out to graze your nipple as he talks you through your climax.
But you're already halfway gone, "Want- want you inside,"
Yuta pulls his fingers out of you, and you clench around nothing as you whine at the sudden emptiness. Yuta doesn't seem too intent on giving it to you so easily though, "You want me inside?.. And what if I don't think you deserve it? What if I make you beg for it?"
You can feel tears well up in your eyes. "Please, please I'll beg. Please Yuta, I can't go another minute without your dick in me!"
Yuta smirks, satisfied with your response. He stands from the bed and pulls his shirt off, following by unzipping his pants. You watch intently as he does so, finally able to see his abs and that tattoo in all of its glory. You could feel yourself throbbing at the view.
"Condom," You whisper, almost like an afterthought, looking at Jungwoo. "Do you have any in here?"
Jungwoo nods, gesturing to Doyoung who sits by the nightstand. "Top right drawer."
Doyoung follows, throwing a package towards Yuta as he catches it before ripping it open with his teeth. Fuckkk that was so hot.
He wastes no time in sliding it over his length, positioning it outside your entrance. You hope he's about to enter but instead, like the tease he is, rubs your clit with his tip gently. Your body already trembling and he wasn't even inside yet.
"Beg," He commands as he continues his previous actions.
"Please! Oh please Yuta-" You chant his name like a mantra as he smiles down at you.
"Don't worry, I'll give you want you want." He speaks, pushing the plush head of his dick past your walls. "Not gonna stop till you're sore."
He continues to push himself farther in as Jungwoo rubs his thumb over your clit, how were they so in synch? Had they done this before?
Yuta finally bottoms out inside you, hissing as you clench around him. "Pussy so fucking tight for such a whore."
You groan as he starts to move, thrusting into you as you babble. Jungwoo's eyes land straight on where your tits bounce, obsessed with the view. God, he was gonna bust in his pants.
You can hear the slight tap of the headboard creaking as it hits the wall behind you, Yuta reaching up to grip it as leverage while he slams into you, and you're trying your hardest not to drool on Jungwoo's pillow.
The younger male smirks before he pulls you into a kiss, silencing your moans for the minute as his tongue explores your mouth.
You whine into Jungwoo's mouth as he continues to sloppily kiss you. Yuta never falters as he watches from behind, he never knew he could enjoy watching you so much. He's borderline obsessed with seeing you two make out while he's inside, he can't get enough.
Doyoung can't see as well from where he sits, but the sounds make up for it. The room filled with the sounds of your muffled moans and skin meeting skin, accompanied by Yuta's heavy groans and pants.
He's doing everything he can to not take his dick out and start palming it, convincing himself to just wait for his turn.
Yuta moved in and out of you, each thrust sending shockwaves of pleasure throughout your body. You cried out as the pleasure became almost too much to bear, body quivering beneath him.
He doesn't let up though, too keen on seeing your pretty face all scrunched up. You were shaking as his movements started to go deeper and deeper into you, there was no way you were going to survive this.
"You feel that baby?" He groans. "Feel how hard you make me?"
You just nod, too focused on the task at hand.
He keeps going, "Look how hard Jungwoo is, he's leaking all over his bed."
You'd love to see, but you can't bring your eyes steady enough to look towards him. Jungwoo lets out a quiet whine at Yuta's words, clearly embarrassed.
"Don't get all shy Jungwoo." Doyoung interjects. "It's cute seeing you so worked up."
You moaned, despite the words not being directed towards you. Doyoung voice mixed with Yuta hitting your g spot brought you directly to another realm of heaven.
Yuta felt his body tremble as his release began to build, his mind spinning as his pleasure reached its peak. He couldn't believe he was really getting to have you like this, in all his wildest dreams come true. His fingers dug into your hips, anchoring him to you as the orgasm started to take over.
You separated from Jungwoo as you started to feel the falter in the others thrusts while feeling a similar build up, managing to sputter out a "Are you close?"
He nods, "Are -shit- you?"
You can barely respond before Jungwoo's bringing your lips back to his. He never wanted to stop kissing you, he couldn't.
You suddenly felt your orgasm rush through her body, your entire body trembling with pleasure. You clung to Jungwoo, fingers digging into his arms as the intensity of the moment hit you.
You gasped as you came, body shaking with the intensity of it, breathing heavily as the pleasure slowly ebbed away.
With a deep growl, Yuta followed as he gave one final thrust and released into the latex. Mind incredibly hazy as he collapsed beside you onto the bed. Breathing heavy as you will your eyes not to close.
He stares at your fucked out face, proud of the little number he did on you. He knows this was likely his first and last chance to see you like this, so he was going to relish in it.
Though, others didn't seem to agree with the slower paced approach, Doyoung moving the other male out of the way to climb onto the bed.
Surprisingly, you try to push yourself up. Though, you're still too unsure to ask for what you want. "Can I..."
"Can you what?" Doyoung mocks after you don't respond for a few seconds. "Closed mouths don't get fed."
Who knew he could be so mean?
"Can I ride you?" You blurt out.
He smirks. "Is that what you want?"
You nod, "Fuck, please Doyoung."
He laughs, leaning back on the head board as he slips his pants down. "Be my guest, if you think you can still hold yourself up."
You place your hands on his shoulders as you wobbly throw your legs over Doyoungs lap before pausing, "W-wait,"
The others immediately halt, awaiting your words.
"Jungwoo's still so hard, and he hasn't touched himself. I should help him." You let out, starting at the male who you started this all with.
"Yuta's got it." Doyoung speaks, while the other male composes himself. "Right?"
The oldest smirks, wordlessly reaching over as Jungwoo's face grows red. He wraps his hand around the base of the youngers shaft and starts moving, kitty licking the tip as Jungwoo moans out.
"D-don't stop, I want to see you and Doyoung." Jungwoo gasps, locking eyes with you before squirming at Yuta's actions. It's not like it was the first time they had done this, but it felt so different every time, especially now that he was taking him wholly in his mouth.
You grow wetter at the sight of your roommates getting each other off, now you see why they like to watch so badly. Yuta looked so pretty with his mouth full of cock while Jungwoo moaned like a bitch in heat and clawed at his bed sheets. Not to mention that Yuta had grown hard again, his own hand snaking down to touch himself.
Doyoung lines himself up, his tip pushing past your walls as you slowly sink down. The stretch burning slightly even though you had been fucked already. You couldn't help but hiss, he was just too big.
You bounce a few times as Doyoung digs his nails into your hips. He's more quiet than Yuta, but less composed. You weren't sure he'd have much to say if he could manage to talk. The most you catch from him are quiet groans and deep breaths.
His eyes don't leave your cunt, directed towards where your bodies meet. He's never felt anything so good, not even his state of the art toys his viewers brought him made him feel this way.
“Need it off.” You mutter, reaching below you towards Doyoung’s cock. He hisses as you pry at the tip, harshly pulling the rubber condom off. You throw the item across the room, bringing your hand back to sink down on him as the other boys watch in awe. 
Jungwoo's quick to intervene, “But-”
“We’ll get her a Plan B.” Yuta reassures him as he comes up for air, and you take notice of the way Jungwoo’s face falls for some reason.
You continue bouncing as Doyoung grabs one of your boobs in his hands. You bite your lip at the feeling, mind already halfway to mush as you continue to spear yourself on his cock. “Feels so good.”
He growls as he meets your hips at an animalistic pace. He finally gains the reserve to speak. Teeth gritting, “You feel better than I imagined, slutty pussy dragging me in.” 
Jungwoo pushes Yuta's head down farther as the other teases, while the other gags at the action. The sounds of slurping register in your ears as you look back that way. You almost cum at the sight.
Jungwoo's face twists as he releases into Yuta's mouth, the latter swallowing it without a qualm. Jungwoo can feel himself growing hard again though. The squelch of your body parts melding together has Jungwoo's head spinning even though he already came.
Yuta snarks as he gets onto his knees, pushing his dick into the youngers face. "Your turn, put those pretty lips to use."
Jungwoo's eyes never leave your body as he opens his mouth. Now, if you thought Yuta looked good like that, nothing compared to how Jungwoo looked. So pliant and content to be helping his friend out.
Doyoung brings your attention back to him as he grabs your jaw, "I'm giving it to you so good that you're shaking yet you're staring at them instead?"
You shake your head, grinding down harder on Doyoung's dick as you stop bouncing, knees growing sore. "I'm sorry-"
He scoffs, grip tightening on your jaw. "No you're not."
"I-" You huff, hearing Jungwoo's pretty noises echo in your head as you fight every bone in your body to turn and look.
"Shut up," He cuts you off. "Look at me when I'm fucking you."
You nod as he thrusts up into you. You whine as he holds you in place, using you like a flesh light of his own design. All you can do is take it, feeling his tip kiss your insides with every thrust. Felt like he was rearranging your guts.
He pounds into you with such vigor that you wonder how he has the strength for it all. You try your best to meet his thrusts but he hardly gives you time to.
You would've never guessed the unbothered Kim Doyoung would be into fucking this rough. The more you know, you guessed.
You shout out, "I'm cumming!"
His speed doesn't falter, and he continues fucking you through your second orgasm of the night. He continues as you whimper at your sensitivity, hoping he was close.
"P-pull out," You sputter out, suddenly reminded that you two were going at it raw.
"I will," He responds, before he's moaning out. "Fuck, lift up."
"O-okay." You say, pulling yourself up slightly as his cock springs back onto his abs, covering his stomach in his release.
"That was so hot." You admit, sitting on the bed.
He blinks, "Yeah?"
You barely manage to turn as Yuta shoots his load out onto Jungwoo's face. His face looking ethereal as licks some of it off of his lips.
Yuta's about to say something when Doyoung speaks, "Yuta, lets go take a bath."
Yuta looks confused, not catching the others hint. "Now?"
Doyoung rolls his eyes, "So we can clean up."
"You're hard again, aren't you?"
The other shoots him a glare, clenching his teeth. "Let's go."
He basically drags the other out of the room as you two watch in confusion. Yuta bids, "See you later."
You stay quiet, unable to move without your body aching. Though you feel sudden energy to keep going as you look beside you.
Jungwoo leans over you and brushes your hair out of your face, and it feels more apparent that its just the two of you in the room. “You okay?” 
“I’m a little sore, but I’m fine.” You admit, wincing a bit as you move your legs in an attempt to sit up. Jungwoo shakes his head as he stops you though. 
“If you're not feeling okay-" He starts but you quickly shut him down,
You tilt your head. "But I've waited so long for you."
However, you can barely focus on his words as you take in his disheveled appearance. God, you wanted to kiss him so badly. Again. 
He grabs your chin gently, lifting it up to kiss you more, and you can almost taste Yuta on him. He takes his time as you feel the urge to press up against him, ignoring the pain in your legs that the others left in their wake. 
“Baby, don’t tease me there.” He whines, stopping the kiss. 
Yet you don’t cease your actions, wanting to hear more of his needy voice. “I want you so bad, Jungwoo.” 
His eyes meet yours, hesitance behind them. “Really, are you sure?” 
“Unless you don’t to-” 
“No no, I want to.” He responds, meeting your lips again. He’s more sure of himself this time, hand snaking to touch your cunt.
You're one hundred percent sure you were in love with Jungwoo. But who was counting?
Before you knew what was happening, he was throbbing inside you. Your cunt spent from the other two, but so willing to take him in as well. He was much bigger than you imagined, but once he was inside you, it was like he lost all semblance of control.
You almost wanted to laugh, what happened to the Jungwoo that was being almost mean to you earlier? Was he so drained that he forgot?
He had you in missionary, long slow thrusts pressing into you as you whimper. He caged you under him, hand holding yours as he used the other for balance. He went in for another kiss again, soft like he was scared you were going to break.
Being with him felt different, of course the others felt good but there was a clear line drawn in the sand with them. Yuta was a performer, he got off to the others looking at him put on a show. Doyoung didn't seem like he was focused on you as much either, and was more about himself.
But Jungwoo? He seemed to be worried about you and only you.
"You're so pretty." He mutters, looking into your eyes.
"P-pretty?" You ask, his length still bullying into you.
"I think you're gorgeous." He confirms, wanting to go in for another kiss.
"Jungwoo..." You wrap your hands around his shoulders as you pull him closer. "I think I like you."
He looks shocked at this, pausing his strokes. "Really?"
You smile, "Yes, really."
"But I'm just me." He avoids eye contact. "You're out of my league and I'm just this dork who studies mechanics! And are you sure you like someone who films himself-"
You interrupt him with a kiss, slipping your tongue past his mouth as you only pull away when you need air. "I don't care about any of that, I like you."
He smiles, "If you hadn't noticed, I've had a thing for you since that day in class when you sat next to me. I was so bummed you weren't even in that class and was just hoping I saw you again."
"Well, I'm glad we found our way back to each other."
"Me too." He speaks before pressing his face into your neck, mumbling as he continues his actions.
You two continue in almost silence, basking in pure love for each other as only small whimpers echo throughout the room. Everything that needed to be said already had been. You two were definitely going to have a long talk after this.
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Living with the boys was no longer temporary, it was now your permanent place of residence. Especially since you had packed up your things and moved into your boyfriends room, granting Yuta access back to his room.
Things had been going well. Midterms went smoothly, Jungwoo was great (The sex was too), and you had landed that job you applied for!
You had even made an appearance in your boyfriends job, with masks of course, but nonetheless his viewers ate it up. Now they even sent comments in begging you to start your own channel, but you think you're far from that.
Things weren't awkward with the boys either, in fact, it feels good to have everything open in the air. There weren't any secrets anymore and things just felt like they were almost back to normal.
Breaking the news to Mark and Haechan was definitely... a scene. Mark was heartbroken on Lee Jeno's behalf while Haechan was more worried about how he was the only friend who hadn't gotten to tap that. To which Mark corrected that he hadn't either, which just led to a mess of a conversation.
People were definitely caught off guard when the news of you together broke. Many thought the pairing was funny.
Those like Haechan and Mark thought you had gone mad. And Jungwoo's studious admirers shuddered at how he could be with someone as provocative as you. Ha! If only they knew.
Jungwoo placed an object in front of you, proud of his efforts. "Here it is, the finished scale model."
You pick up the small jet in your hands, giggling at its design. "I love it, it looks like a tiny plane."
"It's a fighter jet!" Doyoung corrects as he joins you both in the kitchen.
You roll your eyes, "I'm aware, I helped paint the stupid thing."
"Stupid?" Jungwoo gasps dramatically.
"That's not what I-"
"Nope." He stops you. "Too late, the damage has been done."
"Jungwoo, don't be dramatic." You plead, though his eyes are already bulging out of his head.
He places his hand on his chest as he pretends to be hurt. "I'm going to go cry and throw up in my room."
"Dear lord," You begin before he runs off to his room. You've grown used to his antics by now. "Guess I have to go reassure him now."
Doyoung snorts, "Gross."
"Not like that, you pervert!"
"Who said I even was talking about that! You made it all dirty!" He retorts back when Yuta enters the room.
"Contrary to popular belief, we don't just fuck every chance we get."
"Tell that to my ears! You guys keep me up most nights, it's so annoying." Yuta complains. "The walls are thin, you know!"
You giggle, walking out of the room to find your sulky boyfriend as you shrug. "Deal with it."
The two watch as you're out of sight, Doyoung pouring himself water for his tea. He notices the look on the others face as he pats him on the shoulder. "You ever regret it?"
"Regret what?"
"Not telling her."
Yuta sighs, looking down before he shakes his head. "No. Jungwoo makes her happy, and that's good enough for me."
Doyoung chuckles, "We could switch rooms, if you want."
"It's all good, It's not that bad."
"You like listening don't you-"
"I'm going to slap you if you finish that sentence."
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sevenofreds · 3 months
Text
Angel revealing the exact wording of his contract with Valentino (and how he can take advantage of it) recontextualizes so much about his and Val's relationship, his friendship with Cherri (and why it's ultimately toxic for him despite them clearly caring a lot for each other), and his reasons for staying at the hotel.
(Buckle up bitches this is gonna be a long one and I spent way too much time thinking about it)
SO, according to Angel, he only has to do what Valentino says while at the studio. Pay attention to that wording. Not "while working". "While at the studio".
Val's rant to Vox implies that, before Angel moved into the Hazbin Hotel, he was basically LIVING in the studio, which means that, by the wording of their contract, Angel was Val's to control 24/7.
While it doesn't really recontextualize Val's whiny bitchbaby moment in episode 2 (because regardless of the contract's exact wording, he clearly wants to be in total control of Angel), it does give us more information about it; Val was upset that he couldn't physically MAKE Angel do any thing at any time anymore, and Angel KNEW that, too.
So why didn't he ever just leave before? That comes back to Val's treatment of him, and how he views himself (or at least DID view himself until his husband friend Husk came along). Val almost definitely got it into Angel's head that nobody would WANT to take him in or help him, which is (one of, at least) the reason why he didn't trust Charlie at first during the prequel comic.
He wasn't just staying at the hotel because it was rent-free; it was because, as long as he "played nice", he was free of Val outside of work.
It does seem like taking advantage of the wording like that goes both ways (Val can apparently extend his hours on a whim without breaking the contract), but if you wanted out of a situation like Angel's, you'd take anything you could get.
And then we move on to Cherri, and her relationship with partying compared to Angel's.
Cherri Bomb is an anarchist. A chaotic partygirl. She's not trying to escape from anything. She parties so hard because she ENJOYS it. It's her way of having fun, of recharging, and it seems like throughout most of episode 6, she thought that Angel was partying with her for those same reasons.
But as we learned in episode 4, that isn't the case. Angel gets drunk and high to escape, to forget how fucked up his situation is, to forget how much he hates and blames himself for being the way he is. And once he found a functioning support system, and people who cared about him beyond his persona, he didn't need that anymore. He learned to accept that yeah, his situation is fucked, and there's not much he can do...but that doesn't mean that there's NOTHING he can do. And he's not alone.
This leads us to view Cherri as a toxic friend towards Angel, at least until she sees that he's getting serious about the hotel; she's perfectly happy with what she does, and was only goading Angel into it because she thought he was, too (she would thrive in Beelzebub's scene if she were able to go there; Angel would fall into the same category as Blitzø). Once she saw for herself that wasn't the case, she said she was glad for him, and that she'd be there if he ever needs her.
It's evident by that point that they care deeply about each other. But Cherri lives a lifestyle that wasn't ever good for Angel Dust; for Anthony. And that's okay.
Whether he was truly aware of it or not, Angel needed friends. He needed a support system. He wanted to be better than he was. And even if he doesn't quite realize it yet...he's well on his way.
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tia-222 · 5 months
Note
Success Storyy
This is gonna be long one I hope you don't mind I will be leaving from here so maybe my journey could be a little motivation 😅
First of all Tia I really love you and @gorgeouslypink 😭, I've been on the this journey for a very long time since I was like 16,I'm currently 19.
My Journey
After my father's death in 2018,we hit poverty real bad,and I wanted to be there for my mother but all she cared about was her restaurant and my brothers. My father before dying had already named the will under my name when because he wanted my brothers to earn something on their own. But I was allowed to use to use the money when I turn 18. I wanted to get out of the small apartment as soon as possible I found Law of attraction and as we know it was useless for 2 years I wasted my time in law of attraction then on 2020 I found Law of Assumption the best thing honestly.
My LOAssumption journey start during the pandemic,when everything shut down and my mom's restaurant closed. My living condition wasn't the best even before the restaurant was opened,we would earn $90 - $100 dollars a week sometimes even less but it wasn't enough for us because my mother have to give half of it to 3 of the workers,pay our electric and water bill,our rented apartment and my elder and younger brother's college and school fee.
I was the only one studying in a community high school from 3 the of us,both my brothers were in were in private college and school,I didn't had the best relationship with my mother she have always prioritised my siblings because they were boys and never really cared about me both my brothers had their own rooms while I was asked to sleep in the living room's couch.
At that point life was bearable for me,I had even manifested a part time job and was thinking to move out. But it wasn't all easy for me when the lock down was announced I saw how my mother would worry about everything even if she didn't like me I still was the only one who worried about her condition but my brothers were brat and didn't really help for 20 year old my elder brother was too immature and i didn't liked him at all.
And as everyone was there at home 24/7 I start finding it hard to manifest because my circumstances were very unbearable and I couldn't stay in a state. Then is stumble upon Void state and all I knew is i overcomplicated it, I wasn't able to persist in one method,I would constantly change method it continued till this year and then I went back again to LOA for my rescue and then again it was hard for me to manifest big desires and then here I was back again to Void.
How and when did I enter
Since the last week of October I was again persistent to enter void I read every single post properly and was motivated to enter void from there I made a routine but guess what I failed again because of my lazy ass.
About 2 weeks agoi saw a success story by a blogger I forgot her user name but it was Vixen she basically entered through lucid dream and i realized that through out my void journey I never gave importance to lucid dreaming,so why not try become lucid.
My biggest problem was I couldn't choose what affirmations I should use and I was never confident about waking up in void like not at all.
So I just choose one askfirmation to affirm it all the time"Why do I lucid dream every night?".
Along with that I choose random subliminals.
https://youtu.be/Hg3pLT6-JWw?si=aRrLF-JkljuKrs3e
https://youtu.be/nHDLd94SKUI?si=3gN1-zsdW_ki0isV
And I also did psych-k 10 mins not specific time I would do it everytime I'm free.
And I did it only for 9 days. And on 17th of November I officially entered void and affirmed that I always enter void whenever I want.
On 18th of November I made a list of my desires and enter void again official manifested my dream life and I revised my father's death along with that I manifested a new biological mother and also new siblings.
(Don't come at me for changing my mother and siblings I have my own reasons)
I even shifting to my DR I was a in 1940's it was really amazing.
Honestly if I say I'm pretty much of a procrastinator and even doing this easy routine was kind of difficult for me but if you are a person who is consistent then you definitely will lucid dream within a week.
I will be leaving Tumblr forever btw. So farewell to my fellow shifters and manifesters. May you all succeed in manifesting your dream life as well and never give up easily Bye bye✨
Once again I luv you Tia and pink.
MY BEAUTIFUL ANON, OMG CONGRATULATIONS ♡
I am literally so happy for you, my love and your success story is so heartwarming. You've been through so much and wow your persistence really pushed through. Thank you so much for sharing your success story and how you got in. Enjoy your dream life to the fullest, angel, and enjoy your adventures to your drs. I love you so much more <33
@gorgeouslypink ‧₊⋅♡🪐
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messylustt · 10 months
Note
I just finished the Miguel fic and its not bested YET my standers are HIGH. With that being said i have a hobie blurb/fic idea
goody reader! who hobie swear he cant stand (he's obssessed)
you angelllll and this scenario for hobie—ugh it lives rent free now THANK YOU my sweet anon
GOODY-TWO-SHOES AND BRITISH PUNK — hobie brown + reader: just hobie pushing away the fact that he’s obsessed with you, by finding your goody nature “annoying”.
marks no warnings. just a bit of banter. wc 1.6k.
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When you joined the spider society, everyone thought of you as ‘sweet’ and an all in all ‘do gooder’. Many found it endearing, while Hobie claimed to think the complete opposite.
Even though his mouth was saying things like “ya could ‘ave aimed that web better.” And “maybe try catchin’ the evil guy next time…ay?” His body had always stayed close to you.
He said things regarding your ‘sweetness’, pinning it as ‘no good’, it won’t help being overly sweet while fighting bad guys. And god did you being a little ‘do gooder’ and following the rules piss him off the most.
But even after all those confirmations in his head he found himself looking for you, standing next to you in de-briefs or when a few of you would just hang out. It was always when you were in a group—Hobie was near.
And right now as you listened to Jess speak on the new ‘villain of the week’, you felt a presence beside you. As you glanced to the left you saw Hobie, standing, hands in pockets, as he acted oblivious to his own body’s movements.
He had moved closer to you. In his head he brushed it off as him just making sure you were listening and paying attention to Jess’s words so that you wouldn’t fuck anything up this time. (Not that Hobie ever does pay that much attention himself).
Hobie had never been a nitpicker, but when it came to you he noticed all the details. He could almost tell you your own body’s habits before you even realised them yourself. Like the little nose scrunch you’d do when you were bored. Or the tilt of your head, signalling that you were really trying to listen. Or even the press of your lips, showing that you were just…thinking.
He didn’t pay much attention to his reasons for taking such close notice though. No. Because he's sure that the sole reason (only one) is because you've always annoyed him.
“So please….” Jess is saying. “Please don’t touch any of the guy’s gadgets.”
Then the debrief is over, and you’re getting to your feet, having jumped up onto a ledge. Hobie can’t help but watch as you began to walk towards a portal. “Careful there luv…woul’n’t want you to get ahead of yourself. Maybe ya should stay back this round?” Hobie walks backwards, leaning his head slightly to the side as he moves to the portal.
You press your lips together, eyeing him. What is she thinking about?—Hobie thought to himself, eyeing you back, as he continues to speak. “To be good at ya job, ya gotta loosen up on those rules, ya do know that…right?”
“You say that like you think I’m wound tight.” You say, slowly walking with him—his feet still walking backwards as you walked forward.
He raises a brow. “Aren’t you, luv?” He tongue began to absentmindedly play with his lip ring, dragging it slightly between his teeth as he neared the portal. Then he’s leaning back, and falling through it, you not far behind.
The portal had opened up over a high sky, resulting in you both falling. Hobie tilted his head, watching as you faced each other, skyrocketing down. You spare him a tilt of your head, before your web is attaching to a building as you slip away from his line of sight. And Hobie doesn’t know why but his lips had began to twitch up.
Shooting his own web out, he swung to a stop on the building, where everyone else resided. And of course, he yet again moved closer to you.
Directions were given by Jess as the spider variants all went their separate ways. "Nah, you're comin' with me." Hobie says, grabbing your arm as he pulls you towards the edge of the building. "I thought I bothered you too much..." you mutter more to yourself.
"What was that?" Hobie asks, but you just spare him a "Hm?" before you're web slinging to the next building. Hobie scoffs, copying the action.
Soon you're both swinging past buildings, and when Hobie attaches his web to where yours was gonna go, your face actually displays a slight scowl. Hobie raises his brows—effortlessly swinging backwards. "See...I knew ya were fakin' ya sweetness." Hobie comments through the wind.
"And when were you paying so much attention to me for you to know that?" You call back, slipping past him as your hand slightly brushes his guitar strap. He doesn't like the feeling that crawled up his neck when you brushed so close. He was the one who initiated the closeness, and you having barely touched him made him quickly follow you.
Then you're both swinging almost together, Hobie's gaze stuck on your relaxed posture. "Ya did learn from last time right, luv?" Hobie asks, to which you lazily glance at him.
"That wasn't my fault." You say, slipping through a narrow gap. Hobie went over so as not to scratch his guitar. "Ya can't be that blind...can ya?"
"You know, I've never understood why you act like this." You say, coming to a stop on a lower building and gazing down, spotting the gadget wearing anomaly. Hobie fluidly stops beside you as you both crouched down. But as you stared at the anomaly, Hobie stared at you.
"Act like what?" He asks, feeling a strange urge to pull your mask off. Why did he want to see your expressions when he was talking to you?
You glance at him. "Act like you hate me. Maybe you do...but I just can't pinpoint an exact reason why."
"Aw..." Hobie coos. "Scared not everyone is fallin' for ya goody-two-shoes act?"
"It's not an act. And I am not a goody-two-shoes." You slightly huff out.
"Yeah ya are..." Hobie hums out, almost sounding amused. "You always follow the rules, being a dottin' little helper to Miguel."
You look back to the anomaly. Jess had said to wait, as backup, so you do, trying your best to ignore a now closer hobie. "And you always do that...can't find a reason for it either." You mutter.
"Do what?" Hobie shifts closer. You turn your head, eyeing him. "That. Coming close."
"Maybe I'm scared you might do something overly heroic, just to get into Miguel's good books."
"Hobie being scared? Now that's a first." Hobie's surprised to hear the clear sarcasm in your voice. "And what makes you think I'm trying so hard to get into Miguel's 'good books'?" You ask.
"Ya are always the first to accept missions." Hobie says, and he hopes you don't notice his slight jealous tone. "And Miguel seems rather pleased with that."
"Maybe because I'm doing my job?" You ask, finally glancing at him again. And Hobie can't help but swiftly grab your mask. He wanted to know if you were bored, thinking, or actually listening to him.
"Hobie..." You say, reaching for your mask again. "I need that."
But Hobie just pockets it in his jacket. "Nah, Jess won't need us. She's too prideful and...usually completes missions..." He eyes you like he's hinting at something.
"I'm sorry—but when have I ever not completed a mission?" You have a slight frown on your face. And Hobie grins under his mask, liking seeing your expressions. Especially because he's been able to get new ones, like a frown and a scowl.
"Last week." He answers, fiddling with your mask material in his pocket.
You groan. "I told you, that wasn't my fault."
"Hm..." Hobie's eyes had begun to grow distracted in your moving mouth, noticing the details...yet again. The way they would slightly part when you were confused. You were confused now, so Hobie got a chance to see a fraction of your teeth. Why was he focusing so hard? And maybe if his mask was off, you would see exactly where his gaze was trapped.
"Hobie." You say, noticing he had stayed silent for a little too long. "Hobie." You shuffle closer to knock his shoulder. "Can I have my mask back?"
But he just began to shake his head. "Nah...I think I'll keep it." He then stands, looking down at you. You quickly get to your feet also, eyes narrowed. "Why? I do actually need it."
Hobie just shrugs, feeling thoroughly amused with the whole situation. You go to reach for his pocket, but he easily dodges. "This is really not the time." You mutter, trying again. But Hobie just moves around you.
You then swiftly shoot a web, aiming for the inside of his pocket, but hobie snatches the end, yanking you towards him, making tumble to a stop against his chest. And you can feel the slight rumble of a chuckle, making you quickly stand straight, only for your breath to hitch.
Because now his mask is off, and he's extremely close. Now you can see his eyes dart, fully absorbing your details, and you actually grow to feel a tad nervous. "Can I please have it back?"
"Back to the fake sweetness, are we?" He asks, his gaze now stopping on your lips.
"It's not fake." You mutter out, moving to step back, but Hobie tightens his hold on your web, keeping you still. "What are you doing?" You ask, a slight groan of annoyance edging your tone.
Hobie tilts his head, acting as if he isn't doing anything, as his finger comes out to just brush your collarbone through your suit. You don't know what to do, as you stare at him. He'd never been this close, facing you, at least. He's always been behind you or beside you. And now as his tongue comes out to lick his full lips, you find your gaze getting caught up in the action.
"I'm not a goody-two-shoes..." You choose to say, still slightly hung up on the nickname.
"Yeah...ya are." Hobie repeats, this time quieter. "...but it's..." You narrow your eyes on him. 'It's' what? "It's kinda cute, luv."
Your eyes widen. "W-what?"
"Hm?" He quickly hums, before he's webbing away, making you spin to gaze after him. "Hobie!" You call, as you quickly web after him.
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hellish-sunsets · 2 months
Text
Curses and Blessings - Chapter 2
Chapter 1 ~ Chapter 3 ~ Chapter 4 ~ Chapter 5 ~ Chapter 6 ~ Chapter 7 ~ Chapter 8 ~ Chapter 9
Summary:
In this part of the city, close to the outskirts, anyone and everyone could see the large building towering over the rest. It was in… not good condition, but better than the rest of the falling apart buildings, all bricks and old-fashioned architecture, with bright spotlights on the light up sign spelling out Hazbin Hotel. Obnoxious and pointless. 
Word Count: 1,554
Read on AO3
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In the chaos of Pentagram City, where sinners ran amuck and you couldn’t go anywhere without running into some fucker doing the things that got them stuck here in the first place, no one gave a second glance when some random woman was thrown out of a rundown building into the alleyway. She slammed against the far brick wall with a grunt, but made sure not to fall to the ground. A large beast of a man followed with a glower, but kept himself firmly rooted in the doorway. 
“Get going, bitch! Unless you want to get yourself fucked up for real.”
She glared at him, taking a shaky step forward, one arm clutching at her bruised side.
“The fuck is your problem, man? I paid my rent!”
The man just shrugged, a cruel smirk twisting at his lips. “Yeah, but I found a pretty bitch willing to pay just as much, and she’ll fuck me too.” He said with a bark of laughter. “Looks like you’re out of luck. Now get out of here!.”
With that he slammed the door shut, shaking the doorframe, leaving her on the street. Again.
He didn’t even let her get her stuff, the jackass. Not that there was much. Everything important was in the bag slung over her shoulders. 
She leaned heavily against the brick wall, wincing in pain slightly as she opened the bag to double check everything was there. With a nod to herself, she pushed herself off the wall and trudged through the streets of hell, unconsciously tugging her left sleeve down to cover the mark on her wrist.
Alright, first thing first, get a place to stay for the night. That was easier said than done, of course. It was hell, filled with the worst of humanity. There wasn’t going to be any well wishers or good samaritans to help and plenty of greedy or perverted men. Probably both. She would have to be careful.
God, she was so tired of being careful.
Of course, the big issue was her lack of money. She already gave that jackass everything she had for rent. He most definitely wasn’t giving her that back. 
She sighed, glancing up. In this part of the city, close to the outskirts, anyone and everyone could see the large building towering over the rest. It was in… not good condition, but better than the rest of the falling apart buildings, all bricks and old-fashioned architecture, with bright spotlights on the light up sign spelling out Hazbin Hotel. Obnoxious and pointless. 
Everyone in hell knew about the Hazbin Hotel, the little pet project of one Charlie Morningstar, the daughter of Lucifer himself. If it was brought up in conversation, it was with stifled laughter and condescension. As if anyone in hell was capable of something like redemption. Did she agree with them? She wasn’t entirely sure herself. If people didn’t want to change, then obviously they wouldn’t stand a chance. Maybe if they got a few people who actually gave a shit it might work out, but that was a big maybe.
Not of that really mattered right now. What did matter was that anyone could get in for free, and it was a hell of a lot better than a night on the streets. She didn’t want to think too hard about what commitment she was making by even approaching the front steps, but it couldn’t be anything too bad, right? From what she’s seen on TV, this Charlie girl seemed nice enough. The worst she could expect was what, some lame exercises? She could handle that. And it wasn’t like she was a shit person herself. She’d only been in hell for, what, three months? It would take more than that to drag her depressed ass down to these people’s level. She could manage this. She could do this, she could do this! She was already debating joining anyways, just to get out of her last building. 
She was dragged out of her thoughts by the sound of the doorbell, loud and very noticeable even from this side of the large double doors. She almost didn’t even realize she rang it. She took a few steps back, tugging her sleeve down again, anxiety clawing at her throat suddenly. After a few moments, she could make out the sound of hurried footsteps and voices. They hushed suddenly before the door was yanked open and she was greeted by the bright, warmth-filled smile of Charlie Morningstar herself, recognizable from her time on TV. Next to her was another woman, with gray skin and long white hair, not nearly as bright and bubbly. 
“Hello! And welcome to the Hazbin Hotel! Come in, come in!” Charlie all but shouted, ushering her inside the well lit lobby. “Oh my gosh, I can’t believe you’re here. Wait, I mean, um, My name is Charlie! It’s nice to meet you!” 
Charlie happily extended her hand and she hesitantly shook it.
“Um, Y/N…” she mumbled. “I’m, uh, here for a room? And, uh, the whole… thing you do here, I guess…”
“Great! Of course! Come on, let’s pick a room out for you and I can introduce you to the others! Oh, we can do session tonight! And then-” Charlie happily babbled on about sessions and introductions as she turned to lead the way. She hesitantly gave the other woman a look. She gave a friendly enough smirk and motioned for her to follow. 
“It’s Vaggie, by the way.” She mumbled so as not to interrupt Charlie’s rambling. She nodded in acknowledgement, not voicing her first thought which was how unfortunate that name was, but that wasn’t her place. 
As it turned out, the rooms here were a decent size, about what you would expect from a typical hotel with an attached bathroom. It was certainly a hell of a lot nicer than her last place. And she really didn’t have to pay rent? It seemed too good to be true.
“It’s… nice. Thank you.” She offered with a smile, making Charlie beam. She looked like she was going to say something, but Vaggie stepped in, placing a hand on her shoulder. 
“Why don’t you settle in, then you can join us at dinner.”
“Oh, yeah! We’re going to have dinner as a group today! Cook together and eat together, bring everyone together, it’s going to be great.” Charlie explained with her usual enthusiasm as Vaggie guided her towards the door. “Though, I guess you don’t have to help with the cooking today. You can join in next time! I’ll send somebody when it’s ready, okay?”
“Yeah, sounds good, sweetheart. Thank you again.” She replied politely, earning another beaming smile before Vaggie managed to get Charlie out of the room, closing the door behind them. She heard the girl’s excited voice as she was guided down the hallway. 
Y/N waited for it to be quiet before finally letting out the breath she was holding.
She could do this. 
She dropped her bag on the bed, then collapsed onto it face first with a thump. It smelled like fresh linen and laundry detergent, not even the faintest hint of mold or mildew. That, and the sheer softness of it forced a sigh out of her chest, her body melting into the comfort the blankets offered. Yeah, this would be okay. She just… had to keep herself in check, make sure she didn’t ruin this for herself, and make herself useful.
Just don’t be a burden.
She tensed up as the thought passed through her mind, and with it came the disdain of her fathers eyes. Don’t fuck this up, don’t be a buren. 
She dragged herself towards the pillow with a huff, burying her face in it and holding her breath, focusing on her heartbeat. She couldn’t let herself think like that, not now when she had to meet so many people before long. It would be fine, she was fine, it’s okay.
She didn’t even realize she had fallen asleep until the knocking at the door startled her awake. She immediately rushed for the door, yanking it open to the sight of a startled snake-like man. 
“Uh, hello! My name is Sir Pentious and Charlie has assigned me the job of escorting you to dinner.” He said, voice hissing with every syllable. She nodded.
“Of course, just, um, let me get myself ready.” She mumbled, leaving the door open as she headed towards the bathroom to look herself over, trying to tame her hair some and mentally prepare herself for what was to come. 
“We made a beef stew!” Sir Pentious offered from his spot at the doorway. “And that mark on your arm is very pretty! Mine isn’t nearly as appealing…” 
She froze at that, looking down at her wrist. Her sleeve must have gotten pulled up while she slept, revealing the array of gold and orange and pink. She cursed at herself and pulled her sleeve down. 
“I, uh, th-thank you!” she shouted back, wincing.
She had… complicated feelings about her mark and the whole… soulmate thing in general. It was just… better if she avoided the whole thing. She took a deep breath to steady herself and went out to Sir Pentious with a smile, at least pretending she was ready to meet everybody.
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chaoticbardlady99 · 2 months
Text
Never Have I Ever… (Astarion x F! Reader) MDNI 18+
Synopsis: You accidentally befriended the Heroes of Baldur’s Gate at Elfsong a little less than a year after the Elderbrain attacked.
Six months later, on your birthday, you are playing a game of “Never Have I Ever” at Elfsong Tavern and a topic of conversation takes a very interesting turn… that leads directly into the bedroom with your roommate, Astarion.
CW: PIV, Oral, Smut, loss of virginity, other sex words I can’t think of, brief mentions of past trauma
Pic does not belong to me
Likes, comments, and reblogs are always appreciated 💜 thank you for reading!!!
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The warm laughter that fills the air is infectious as you take another welcome sip of the red wine Astarion insisted you try. You are so horribly in love with the man that he could probably convince you to enjoy poison if he really tried.
As a new introduction to the friend group, you didn’t expect to find a roommate a short 3 months after getting your job at Shadowheart’s Clinic. You had just moved to Baldur’s Gate- you apparently have horrible timing- but you were happy to help with healing the injured, checking in on the sick, and even helping people grieve their loved ones appropriately.
You weren’t originally living with anyone. In fact, you had been staying at Elfsong for an extended period of time. Around month 3, you had been playing a late set (Being a cleric and Bard for Oghma is a big job) and you hadn’t noticed the man following you back to your room. Thankfully, Astarion had promised to go see your set and had noticed the intruder after you had said good night.
It was safe to say you were shaken and Astarion immediately told you that you A. Did not have a choice and would be taking his second bedroom and B. Need to be significantly more aware. You agreed to both.
He tries desperately hard to return your rent money to you- insisting that he is more than well off enough. You just stare at him silently until he feels so uncomfortable he takes it. You refuse to live in his very nice townhome for free- especially since you know his backstory.
Astarion has his first place, all to himself, and he has allowed you to intrude upon that space because you very nearly died or worse one night. He swear it isn’t an intrusion, but you always worry- it’s one of the few things you are very good at.
Paying rent also prevents you from becoming unrealistic in your expectations of your relationship with him.
It is just a friendship, roomie situation- nothing more, nothing less. You crave more, obviously, he’s everything you’ve ever wanted out of a partner- even the grumbly, more closed off pieces. You’ve stayed up with him through his nightmares and you’ve fallen asleep in each other’s arms more than a few times, but that was just comfort for him.
Right?
“Never have I ever…,” Wyll trails off, obviously very drunk as he leans on his fiancée, Karlach, for support, “had sex!”
The rest of the group groans about how unfair that is, but you aren’t necessarily sure what to do.
You’re a virgin and it’s something you’ve kept pretty close to the chest up until this point. You might as well keep the party rolling.
You barely drink- just enough to pretend- and no one seems the wiser.
Oh, but you are just a silly little drunk fool because of course Astarion notices. You are practically all he seems to notice anymore- or at least that’s what it feels like.
Everything about you pulls him in and he craves you.
Gods does he crave you.
He has to bite back the possessive growl that threatens to tear through his throat as he watches the alcohol not even touch your lips- the sleight of hand may have tricked their companions, but not him.
He adores you and at first it mortified him- now it just consumes him. Astarion loves spending every second he can with you- whether that be reading, cuddling, talking, etc. Maybe another activity could be added to the addendum…
His fangs nip his bottom lip as he tries to snap himself back into reality and not be stuck in the idea of what you would sound like underneath him. It’s especially hard to ignore the fact that he would be the only one who knows what pleasure looks like on your face and in your voice- how your body responds to being teased and worshipped.
“Star! You’re bleeding!”
Shit. I must have bit my lip too hard.
You take your clean napkin and begin to dab away the blood on his lip. The moment your other hand touches his cheek to keep him steady- he feels like he’s melting.
“All better,” you say with a beaming smile.
“Thank you, Darling. I have no idea what I would do without you.”
“I don’t know what he’d do without you,” Tav drunkenly chimes in, Gale facepalms at his wife’s antics, “gosh darn’t- stop spilling your own blood! Worst vampy ever!”
The collective HUSH around the table makes Astarion laugh and Tav looks at him sheepishly.
“Sorry.”
“Oh it is more than fine, my very drunk friend,” Astarion teases, “if anything, I think you need more wine.”
Gale groans, “please don’t encourage her.”
Astarion’s spirit became more and more restless the longer the night out continued. This wasn’t his ideal plan for the night, but he had chickened out at the last minute.
He had initially wanted to take you out on a date- today is your birthday and you didn’t want the whole group to know since you don’t love the attention, but Astarion has taken advantage of the opportunity.
He had already given you the flowers he had “just happened” to find earlier that day and you had been over the moon.
Astarion had also ‘purchased’ a gold bracelet for you- the delicate metal was simple with a single malachite heart charm on it. He learned very, very quickly that you believe in all that ‘crystal nonsense’ as Lae’zel puts it. Astarion’s heart glows a little bit when he catches it reflecting candle light off your wrist. You loved the bracelet equally as much and kissed him on the cheek.
While he isn’t necessarily sure he believes in that crystal nonsense, Astarion does believe in you so the Rhodochrosite bracelet you had bought him shortly after you moved in is almost always on his wrist. You explained that it was meant to heal trauma- he later learned that it more specifically helped with sexual trauma. You never elaborated on it or pestered, but the gesture in itself made him feel accepted and safe.
The first night he opened up to you had also been the first time it hit him that he genuinely has feelings for you. Those feelings have grown naturally and Astarion rarely feels the need to put a mask up when he’s around you anymore. Astarion is as ‘messy’ as he wants because you’d already seen through him and you have continued to hold space for him- grounding him in your atmosphere.
You want him too- of course. Whether you have realized that or not yet- Astarion isn’t sure.
You occasionally let him feed from you (if you don’t have to pull an all-nighter for a Tavern gig) and he can taste your desire in your blood. The shyness and lack of advances on your end make more sense now- you are entirely inexperienced.
It’s absolutely delicious and now Astarion is really kicking himself for not asking if you could both skip meeting with your mutual companions to go out together.
Astarion wanted to ask to take you to dinner. He wasn’t quite sure why that was his first thought considering he can’t eat, but he figured he could drink wine while the two of you talked. His next plan of action was to offer his hand to you as you walked home together, maybe read together for a bit, and then he was hoping that you could be, well, intimate with each other. He genuinely wants to be with you that way and he hopes the feeling is mutual, but that you don’t only see him as a sex object.
Astarion breathes a sigh of relief when the group finally decides to leave the tavern. It may not be the night he envisioned, but it’s quickly amended by the walk home. His idle fingers take up the space between yours and you don’t fight the invasion- instead you smile coyly and a Rosie blush paints your cheeks. He wonders what it would feel like to have your hands entangled in his hair as he-
“Astarion?”
His train of thought is interrupted by his name leaving your lips- your brows furrowed in concern.
“Are you okay? I’ve been asking you if you want to continue to read that book together when we get home, but you seem kind of out of it.”
“Oh!” he manages to choke out, “I- of course, Darling- I would love to continue our book. I apologize, I didn’t realize how lost in thought I had become.”
You open the door of the apartment, a look of concern still adorning your face. You are so adorable and wonderful- he wants to kiss the worry off of your face.
You are discarding your shoes at the door while Astarion goes to locate the bottle of wine he had purchased earlier that day. Reading is fun and all, but Astarion has another idea.
Why not use a childish game to move your relationship forward? It’s not like Astarion has ever claimed to be above that and he could easily pass the idea off as wanting to continue having fun.
“That’s not a book,” you tease, eyeballing the bottle of wine suspiciously, “are you attempting to put me in a stupor and on my birthday nonetheless?”
“Darling,” he says with a gasp, his hand splayed across his chest, “how dare you accuse me of such a thing? I’m positively hurt.”
You merely roll your eyes at him, but happily accept the glass he pours you. As you go to sip- he puts his hand over the top of the glass.
“I was thinking we could continue that debaucherous little game we were all playing earlier,” Astarion says with feigned innocence, “what was it called again? Ever have I? Never have I?”
“Never have I ever?”
Astarion tries not to smile too widely at the way your eyes slightly widen at his words and his enthusiastic nod. He wonders if you realize you’ve been caught.
“Yes! Thank you, Darling- that would have driven me to the brink of insanity,” he says with a chuckle, “in the spirit of good fun, you may go first.”
You give him an unamused look before giving in.
“Never have I ever….. been a VAMPIRE!”
“You wretched little-!”
Astarion scowls, pretending to be irritated as he sips his wine. He narrows his eyes at you and feels his chest bloom with feelings of affection as the mischievous glint in your eye grows brighter.
“Never have I ever… lit a bookshelf on fire.”
Your cheeks burn brightly as you leer at him over the top of your glass. The questions continue to be absurd and personal- questions that the others wouldn’t even begin to think about asking.
Never have I ever read this trashy novel, never have I ever been personally victimized by my roommate buying a ‘stay out’ sign, so on and so forth until Astarion finally feels comfortable enough to use the one ‘never have I ever’ that he’s been sitting on since you both arrived at home.
“Never have I ever lied about having sex.”
The look on your face is priceless. Astarion can’t help but let the thrilled little giggle leave his lips as you stammer over your words.
“Uh- I- hmmmmmmmmm,” you gulp the remaining morsels of wine, “how did you… was it that obvious?”
It’s moments like these where he forgets tact and says the first stupid thing that comes to his brain.
“No, I just made a point of watching.”
Shit.
Your lips purse as a look of satisfaction crosses your face. You wiggle your eyebrows at him before pouring yourself a bit more wine.
“Oh is that so?” you tease, “and why ever would you feel the need to do that?”
Cheeky pup.
“Hmmmm,” he hums, sliding closer to you on the couch, “you could say it may align with an interest of mine?”
The words you are about to say die on your tongue when his fingers begin to trail up under your dress- his eyes find yours in an attempt to ask a silent question.
Your eyes are blown wide with lust, need, and adoration. Your body naturally relaxes under his touch and he can already smell the scent of your budding arousal.
“Wh- what kind of interest?” You whisper, looking at him earnestly.
“Well,” Astarion moves until he’s hovering over you on the couch, he begins leaving a trail of sweet kisses along your jaw, “a tactful, brilliant individual such as myself needed to know for research as you are a subject I have yet to study.”
“And if you were?” you stammer, “given the opportunity, I mean?”
Astarion’s route along your jaw stops abruptly as he looks at you- the nervousness in your voice causing him to doubt his assessment of the situation. He’s surprised to see a hopefulness in your gaze- maybe you do just want sex? Maybe that’s all you want from this at all?
Astarion tries to suppress the disappointment that threatens to pull angry words out of his mouth. If this is what he is to you then he supposes he can live with that.
“Naturally we’d be having sex already, my Dear.”
You are searching his face and your lips are pursed in a thin line.
“I haven’t been… intimate with anyone because I want it to be with someone I really care about,” you say softly, “and I really care about you, Astarion. That’s why I want to make sure that this is what you want- that you care about me in this way too.”
Astarion isn’t really sure what to do with that information. He’s sure the blank stare on his face isn’t helping the situation or your nervousness.
A choked sob gets stuck in his throat- you care for him and you are willing to have sex with him because you care for him. It’s not just because you think he’s ‘pretty’ or fell for all his honeyed words.
“This is what I want, Darling,” he returns your words with equal softness, “I want to be with you in every intimate way imaginable.”
A shock overwhelms his body when you sit up and hesitantly press your lips to his, but he rebounds even faster the moment you start to pull away.
Your lips are soft and warm against his. They are even more wonderful than he could ever imagine. Astarion grinds himself into you- noting how perfectly you fit together with him between your legs. The shakey moan and clash of teeth causes him to smile.
Instead of taking control of the situation, he allows you to guide him. Your inexperienced mouth is clumsy with it’s affections as you learn how to intertwine yourself with him.
The touch and act is affectionate and unhurried, curious and innocent. Astarion feels like a giddy virgin himself as he begins to explore the skin hiding underneath your flimsy dress.
Your arousal is already coating the inside of your thighs, your underwear soaked through, and Astarion nearly loses his composure entirely. He wants to let you take this at your pace, but Gods above that is not going to be an easy feat.
His curious hands find purchase on your hips and at the hem of your underwear- his thumbs dipping underneath the fabric to tease you ever so slightly.
It feels like electricity courses through both of you with each moment of skin contact. You’ve laid next to each other, you’ve fallen asleep in each other’s arms, and overall, you’ve developed a friendship with each other.
You feel made for him and he feels made for you.
You have never felt more confident in a decision in your entire life. Your body sparks to life under his touch and you try to push aside the embarrassment you feel with every whimper and moan that leaves your lips.
You want- no need- more. You want to know him and you want him to know you.
You boldly allow your hands to meet his and you begin to discard your already soaked underclothes- Astarion growls against your neck at the action. His hands grab yours- pinning them above your head and you whine in protest.
“Someone’s eager,” he teases, “are you tired of feeling empty, Little Love? Would you like me to ruin you for anyone else?”
You clench around nothing and shake your head ‘yes desperately in response. Astarion clicks his tongue and smiles devilishly.
“That’s not an answer, Darling.”
“Please.”
He lifts an eyebrow expectantly and you huff in frustration- looking away from him. One of his hands guides your eyes back to his and his thumb gently glides along your lower lip, coaxing a needy whimper from you.
You feel so embarrassed- trying to express what you need, but maybe he finds it enduring? Or at least you hope he does.
“Will you please make love to me, Astarion?”
Astarion’s face looks like the definition of happiness as he smiles down upon you- for a creature of the night, he sure is capable of beaming like the sun.
The offending article of clothing is removed and tossed somewhere across the living room as Astarion settles his face in between your legs.
“Well since you asked so nicely,” he says teasingly while nipping at the sensitive skin of your inner thighs.
He takes his sweet time kissing and cleaning up the nectar that coats your legs, your growing need making you more and more impatient as you writhe under his touch. Astarion makes a point of avoiding your wanting heat- tears pricking your eyes as you become more and more overstimulated.
“You are so, so beautiful,” he breathes against your skin, “so beautiful and good.”
“Astarion, please.”
The desperation in your voice pulls a hum of pleasure from Astarion as he presses one more kiss on the inside of your thigh. You open your mouth to beg again- to ask for literally any contact- when you feel his cold tongue lick all the way up your folds, circling your sensitive clit, before latching his lips to the bundle of nerves.
You keen- loudly- at the sudden attention on your clit and Astarion has seemed to quickly find that perfect spot- teasing it with his tongue as your back arches and your hips press into his face.
Astarion’s fingers push your hips down, locking you in place against the couch, and you feel another shudder of arousal go through you when you think about the bruises that are bound to be on your hips in the morning.
Astarion’s expert tongue circles and teases at your clit- occasionally taking a detour to taste you, lapping up every part of your essence.
He feels like he’s starving as he devours you with his tongue- if he could have it his way, he would never stop.
You are so wet for him that the couch underneath you is soaked and your dress surely isn’t much better off. Your moans and whimpers cause his cock to strain painfully against the front of his pants.
He decides to kiss back up your body, ripping open the lacy fabric of your dress. The Gods must be real because it’s a damn miracle that you aren’t wearing a bra.
Thankfully you don’t seem to be too worried about the state of your dress.
Astarion greedily sucks one of your nipples between his teeth while the other is rolled between his thumb and index finger.
He wants to consume you and you want to be consumed.
Your fingers find purchase in his hair and you have his mouth on yours within seconds. His other hand returns to your now neglected breast. You cry out against his mouth with each pinch of his fingers and your pleasure has begun to soak through the front of his own pants. He’s certain he’s created his own mess anyway.
Admittedly, he’s been thinking about playing with your breasts all week. You loudly complained about how sore they felt since your moon blood was coming next week. Astarion has been thinking about every delicious way to massage the soreness away since.
His hips grind into your exposed cunt- snaking one of his hands inbetween the two of you, he begrudgingly replaces the pressure of his clothed cock by sliding a finger inside of you.
He adores how your back arches underneath him and the way his name falls off your lips like a prayer. Your heels are digging into his back and your head is thrown back as you keen with each movement of his finger. Astarion curls his fingers upward and focuses on the perfect spot- your toes curl with the sensation and your moans become higher in pitch.
The second one meets some resistance and he’s almost positive a third finger is going to be needed before you are ready, but you clench around his hips, grabbing his attention.
“Astarion- I need you inside me please,” you beg him.
Whatever resolve he had to make sure you were 100 percent ready has broken with that simple sentence. He’s pulling you up off the couch and into his arms- practically racing to throw you on the bed in his room.
To be entirely honest- Astarion can’t even remember if he was actually wearing any clothes considering how quickly he pulls them off.
Astarion has you laid across his bed- ready and wanting for him. You are positively exquisite.
Your shy eyes and body try to hide from him- your arms coming to cover your breasts and your eyes looking away from him. You are suddenly very aware of the lack of clothing and Astarion- well- he looks like an angel.
You drink in his silhouette while avoiding his eyes and you feel yourself clench around nothing at the sight of his cock- hard and dripping with precum because of you. You. The silly, awkward virgin that has never been in a relationship before.
Eager hands are entangling themselves with yours and Astarion’s suddenly on top of you again with your arms pinned away from your face.
“Look at me.”
The command sends a wave of desire through you- Astarion’s voice is thick with arousal and you forget to breathe when you finally look at him.
Astarion has been all sharp edges and mischief since you’ve met him, but right now?
His eyes are soft and inviting- akin to warm crimson bed sheets rather than blood weeping from a cut. Astarion’s lips are slightly parted as he tries to commit your face to memory. His usually perfect hair is mussed up from all the attention you’ve given it.
“I am certain the Gods have sent you to destroy me,” he murmurs in awe before pressing a kiss to your forehead, “tell me if I need to be more gentle, my Love.”
Astarion lines himself up with your entrance and you wrap your legs around his waist. He gently pushes himself inside of you, giving a little bit more every time until his hips are flush against yours. The further he goes, the more his train of thought disappears.
You feel wonderful and the whimpers that leave your mouth with every inch more he gives you makes him moan loudly into the crook of your neck. He kisses up and along your jaw, praising you for taking him so well.
You have never felt more full in your entire life- it feels… right. Like your body has been made to fit with Astarion’s. The light rocking movement of his hips works to ease the initial discomfort of adjusting to his size, but you already feel like you need more. You want to be lost in this moment with him- you want to know and feel everything.
It’s as if he reads your mind as he pace begins to pick up, his thrusts begin to get longer and more drawn out. The tears that were initially pricking your eyes have disappeared entirely in favor of desperate, borderline embarrassing, wanting moans.
“You feel so incredible, Darling,” Astarion whines as thrusts into you, “you are being so good for me.”
His eyes meet yours and he slows his motions ever so slightly- your body protests at the loss of friction, but Astarion’s lips gently coaxing gasps from yours distracts your body from the lack of motion.
The world surrounding you feels absolutely nonexistent as Astarion kisses you deeply. One of his hands finds purchase in your hair and deepens the kiss even more. You feel as if you could float away from the onslaught of affection as you return his affections with equal fervor.
Astarion pulls himself almost entirely out of you before snapping his hips- rutting himself back into you. Your lips leave his, favoring a shape fit for a breathy cry of pleasure.
He finds your eyes again in the haze of his own euphoria. This is a dream to him- a wonderful, beautiful dream.
“I adore you,” you whisper against his lips.
Astarion smiles giddily.
“And I, you.”
Astarion loses his composure as he picks up his pace again- you clench around him, your already tight heat engulfing him even more with each movement of his hips. Your orgasm runs through you- your legs are shaking around him as your grip around his hips begins to give.
Astarion supports the lower half of your body, groping your ass as he chases his own little death.
“I need you to cum inside me, Astarion,” you say wistfully, “cum for me please.”
That’s all it takes to drive him over the edge entirely- no longer able to hold on anymore as his seed pours inside of you. Astarion buries his face in the crook of your neck as he let’s the feeling of pleasure wash over him.
You smell of sex and your favorite soap, which has coincidentally become his favorite soap, and he sighs happily when you start lazily tracing circles along his shoulders. You’ve done this for him before, in a more clothed setting, but it’s a thousand times better when he’s able to feel all of you against him.
Astarion can’t remember the last time he had sex with someone and felt like he was comfortable in their arms. Honestly, he’s more than comfortable with you and yes, that does terrify him.
He just had the best sexual experience of his life and yet he is still terrified because he doesn’t want you to leave or decide this is all he’s good for.
“Starry?”
He hums in response.
“Are you okay?” you ask in a whisper, “you got really tense just now.”
Astarion is quick to look at you when you ask that question. Your eyes are curious and your brow is furrowed. He really can’t hide anything from you. Astarion rolls over onto his back- not wanting you to see how scared and already heartbroken he is. He honestly isn’t sure what he would do if he stopped meaning anything to you- anything of value anyway.
“I… I don’t want…,” he struggles to get the words out, “I- this has been probably the single best sexual escapade that I have ever had, my Love. My only hope is that… you don’t only see me for, well, sex after tonight.”
He’s surprised when you crawl over to him, straddle him, and then put his face between your hands. The serious look in your eyes worries him- did he upset you? Offend you? Are you going to-
“I want you to throw that thought away right now and if you can’t- then I will assure you everyday before it goes away,” you say firmly, “I’ve fallen for you- all of you- over these several months. I think you are the smartest, most interesting, and funniest man I have ever met. I look forward to coming home to you and I hate leaving in the mornings.
“I… you are all I have ever wanted out of a partner or even just a person, Astarion. I choose you- I choose you everyday- in whatever way you’ll have me.”
All Astarion does is cry in response. He doesn’t mean to and of course he wishes he would stop.
I’ve known you for 200 years. Haven’t I suffered enough?
I choose you- I choose you everyday.
You hold him while he cries and Astarion lets himself soak up the feeling of safety- truly believing it this time. You want him for him and you will never know how much that means, but Astarion always will.
When he’s done crying, he kisses you gently sitting you both up against the headboard with you still on his lap. Astarion runs circles into your thighs as you lay your head on his chest and his head rests against yours. You remain there together for a while before you finally break the silence.
“Do you want to talk about it Star?”
Astarion thinks for a moment.
“I- no,” he says hesitantly, “not right now- I just want to enjoy this moment with you, my Dear.”
You hum in response and then look around the room. Your eyes spot something that causes you to sport the cheekiest grin Astarion has ever seen.
“You didn’t finish your wine.”
He looks over and then back to you with an eyebrow raised.
“I suppose I did not. Why-“
“Never have I ever had sex with someone on their birthday.”
A pregnant pause envelopes the space between you- Astarion blinks at you a few times in astonishment and then reaches for the wine glass- a loving smile on his face.
He’s grateful- you never push him and you don’t force him to continue talking about difficult subjects once he’s calmed down. Perhaps he’s even more grateful that he may be able to spend a lifetime with you, if he plays his cards right. Gods, he hopes he plays his cards right. Astarion is not much of a planner after all.
“You’re lucky I adore you.”
“I know.”
183 notes · View notes
spider-man-199999 · 11 months
Text
Pacifier
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pairing: Peter Parker x Fem!Reader;
word count: 5K
warnings: drinking; mentions of sex ; Peter is younger than the reader, but still 18. Reader is around 20. Peter is trying to pin reader even though he is younger.
summary: In this one you’re hired as Morgan’s babysitter (and low-key underpaid Stark!assistant). Looking after a little girl isn’t too hard, but looking after her “big bother” as well, definitely is.
an: I might make a part 2; I had so much fun writing this!
part2!
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A loud crash from outside the room interrupted the story you were reading to Morgan. She didn't seem bothered, probably used to this type of sounds around the Stark tower, but you definitely weren't. Afternoon naps weren't her favourite and she was almost asleep when someone decided to be so loud outside and interrupt. You sighed and got up. 
"I'll be back in a second." you told the little girl as you paced towards the door.
The crashing sounds were becoming more frequent, like someone was hitting walls, falling over on the floor, knocking things out. You didn't really know what to expect on the other side.
"Hey, asshole, I'm trying to put Morgan to sleep here." you said as you opened. 
You saw a figure fall over on the floor and start rolling immediately after that. A red and blue suit. There was something on his face, it looked like an octopus but not quite and it seemed like it was trying to eat his head. You were relatively new to all of this Avengers thing, you were hired a while ago but Tony kept you at a distance, however, you definitely knew an alien when you saw one.
"Actually, nevermind." you corrected yourself and walked back in Morgan's room, closing the door shut.
That's how you met Spider-man. 
"I could really use a hand here!" he said between pants and grunts, fighting the thing. 
You pressed your forehead against the door, thinking about it for a second. Morgan was fast asleep the second you walked away from her, which made the situation a little easier. 
"I don't get paid enough for this shit." you whispered to yourself and opened the door again, walking out into the hallway. 
You looked around, trying to find something that would be useful. Spider-man was still rolling around on the floor, pulling at that thing that was making weird squeaky sounds and spreading something like saliva everywhere. The closest thing to a weapon there was a vase with the length of your forearm that got knocked over in the process. You grabbed it and walked over to the rolling man on the floor. 
"Stay still." you told him.
He lay on his back, still pulling the thing away from his head as you slammed the vase into it, breaking it. The alien squealed in pain and for a second stopped trying to bite off Spider-man's head. He took advantage of that and threw it to the foor, shooting a web over it after that. He finally relaxed as the fight for his life was over, looking over at you. 
"Thanks." he muttered
"Yeah um, no problem I guess?"
----------------------------------------------------------------------
"Hey, can you run to the lab, I forgot a black file folder there and I need it for my meeting that's in like 5 minutes." Tony said while checking his watch.  
You were playing with Morgan and her dolls in the living room when he walked in. He seemed in a hurry, fixing his tie. You looked around the room after he spoke, it was just the three of you.
"Me?"
"No, Morgan. Of course it's you, I'll play with her while you're gone. And skim over the papers, there should be 10 pages inside. You have 3 minutes."
You got up and moved as quickly as you could. On most days you were losing the idea of the whole babysitting thing. Often Tony would make you do things like you were his assistant, schedule meetings, arrange travels, send you off buying things. You didn't mind doing that, especially since he was paying you and you got to live rent free in the Stark tower with his family. You were free to attend your university classes, that was part of your contract, but besides that you didn't get any other off hours. A contract that Tony made you rewrite yourself after you got accepted into ESU to fit both of your needs legally. You couldn't really complain though. The job came with more perks than anyone could ever want. Plus, you got to know all of the Avengers and people that talked to you in class were always excited to talk to you because of that. 
You read through the pages in the folder on your way back to the living room. All 10 of them were there and they were about some new materials and research for the Spider-man suit Tony had been making. 
Oh, Spider-man.
After your first encounter with him, things got kind of awkward whenever he came by. He was a nice kid, a little nerdy, but would never pass up an opportunity to flirt with you. It's not like you hated the attention but your life was already too busy to think about boys. 
"Heyyyyyy" you heard when you walked into the living room, looking up to see Peter smile. He was blushing while he looked at you. 
You closed the folder and handed it to Tony while you held the awkwards eye contact with the younger boy. 
"You should review the third page, it's not clarified where the electrum that you're using came from. If it's a naturally occurring alloy or a man-made one. The origin may not be important when you're actually using it, but for the lawyers it is."
"Oh, right, thanks kid." Tony said, taking out a pen from the inside pocket of his jacket so he could write down the missing information. 
You walked over to the kitchen, grabbing yourself a bottle of water. Peter tailed after you like a puppy. 
"Can you pass me a bottle as well?" 
You grabbed one and tossed it in his direction. The two of you took a sip at the same time. 
"So how was school?" you asked him
"Fine, the usual. We had a quiz in physics, I think I did well. How was uni?"
You shrugged at his question, looking over at Morgan. You could see her sitting on the floor and watching something on the TV through the door. Pepper was about to be home any minute now, which meant you were off duty for the night. 
"Shouldn't you be joining the meeting?"
"No, mr Stark thinks the only thing I'll be good at is distract people there."
"He has a point."
"You didn't answer my question."
"I had to skip this week. Tony flew over to Germany with Pepper, I had to run things around here."
"There goes being a responsible student."
You rolled your eyes at him. University classes were nothing like school, you could afford missing them as long as you could catch up on the material on your own after that. Peter was so actively trying to close the gap between the two of you that it was getting annoying. 
"It's fine, next week The Vacation starts. I'll be free for 14 whole days to knock myself out with classes."
"The vacation?" Peter asked, following your steps when you went down the hall, headed to your room.
The Vacation was a tradition that you imposed on the Stark family as "a good habit to establish closeness between them and trust in you". It was an event that occurred for an entirety of two weeks every year since you started working for them. It was the second time they were going to do it and you were more than thrilled that your plan worked. The whole point of it was to bring the family closer together. You would pick the destination, make reservations in a very expensive hotel on a far off island and send all of the Starks there to bond. There were few rules, mostly ideas that you collectively brainstormed. They were not allowed to use phones, the only exceptions that could be made were if 1) the world was ending; 2) aliens were invading earth; 3) someone died. And in those cases, you had to call the hotel and make the staff inform Tony. The only downside was that you didn't get to go. But that wasn't all bad, you had 2 weeks to go to all the college parties your heart desired and do all the things you usually didn't have time to. 
"Yeah, we get two weeks off."
"We?"
"The Starks, I meant. They are the ones who get to go on a trip and relax for 14 days while we keep things running around here."
"Does not sound like something Mr. Stark would do."
"You're right, he hated it at first but after he came back it was... He was very different."
The two of you had reached your bedroom at that point, standing in front of the door.
"So you'll be gone for two weeks?"
"Unfortunately, no, but I already have plans."
----------------------------------------------------------------------
"Wait what do you mean he's staying here?" you asked, looking around the table. 
Tony said he wanted a big dinner before they left for Santorini, and that somehow translated to your regular once a month "family" dinners with Peter. You looked over at the flustered boy, throwing mental daggers at him while Tony spoke. 
"I took a chance last year, but no I don't really like the idea of you being alone here for an entire two weeks."
"Is this because I did something to lose your trust or do you just think I'm defenseless?"
"I don't think you're ENTIRELY defenseless. But it does feel more comfortable to have someone with, say, super strength around, just in case."
"In case of what? Me wanting to rearrange the entire house? Just a reminder that if I didn't help him three months ago, his head would be in some octopus' belly right now."
"You're exaggerating that!" Peter whined, embarrassed by the reference.
"Look, kid, I know you well enough to understand how irritating this must be for you, and a year ago I probably didn't care enough if you died while we were gone-"
"TONY!" Pepper tried to cut him off.
"-but as I was about to say, now I do. That's my decision and it's final."
You really wanted to continue the argument, to try and persuade him into changing his mind. But you didn't. His words touched you and you could really see where he was coming from. But Peter... out of all the Avengers out there, all of the 8 thousand mutants in New York, he had to choose Spider-man.
"I promise you won't even know I'm here!" Peter said, in a desperate attempt to appease you. 
"Peter, it's alright." 
Your reaction had taken everyone a back, they expected you to fight back more fiercely than this. 
"What?" you asked when you noticed everyone's stare. "Did you really expect me to throw a tantrum over this? Wow, maybe I should come with you after all, apparently you people don't know me at all."
----------------------------------------------------------------------
The first couple of days were actually going according to your plans. You wanted to go to some parties and you were doing just that. You stumbled out of the elevator, giggling to yourself. A spider web shot your hand to the wall. Normal you would immediately start asking what the fuck was happening, but drunk you just looked at the web and started laughing her ass off. 
"Oh my god I'm so sorry!" Peter ran towards you, pulling at the web on your hand. You kept on laughing. He actually thought you were someone who was trying to break in.
"I'm lucky you shoot webs and not bullets!"
"Well, webs aren't the only thing I can shoot." he muttered under his breath. 
"Ew, Pete, nasty." you giggled, placing your hands on his shoulders. "I'm so glad you have super-strength. I can't walk."
"What?"
"Take me to my bedroom, please." you laughed, your knees feeling wobbly because of the alcohol. He felt you start to relax and wrapped his arm around your waist, holding you tightly. 
"Damn, so Mr. Stark was right, you needed someone around to take care of you." He said, a blushing mess while he picked you up like a bride and started walking towards your room. You wrapped your arms around his neck, your head rested on his shoulder. 
"Pffff, no, I'm the caretaker!! I'm taking care of you too right now!" you protested. 
"Sure you are." he laughed, loving that side of you. He wished your normal conversations could be this effortless and fun. Peter hated the front you were always putting on in front of everybody, especially him. He opened the door to your room, walking in and placing you down on the bed. He looked at you laying on the bed, wondering if he should take advantage of your bubbliness or not. 
Your hands moved down to your jeans, you were drunk, but there was no way in hell you were going to sleep in your clothes. You undid them and started pulling them down your legs. 
"Wow, wow, wow, though we were at least going on a date before this." you heard Peter say, noticing him in the room just now. 
You gasped in shock, starting to laugh after that. He turned his back not to look while you undressed, wondering if he should just leave or not. 
"Hey, I was meaning to ask..."
"Shhhhh, you talk way more than you usually do in my dreams, I'm trying to sleep."
"In your dreams?" he asked, turning his head so fast he almost snapped his neck. You were laying down in your underwear, back turned to him. 
"Yeah, like now, you're almost always in my dreams, but we never talk."
"What do we do then?"
You rolled over on your back, head turning towards him to look in his eyes. Even in the pitch darkness he could feel your eyes burning the skin on his face and it made him blush even more. 
"You know what we do, you're always there!" you said, annoyance in your tone. 
That's when he knew he had to draw the line and walk out of the room, it felt wrong to take advantage of your state and he knew you would kill him the next day if you remembered anything. 
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Peter Parker was a lucky bastard. Not only did he get to be alone in the same house as his crush for two whole weeks, but somehow he even managed to convince her to go to Flash's party with him. Yes, you were very displeased with that fact, tried everything in your power to convince him it was a bad idea but he didn't listen. 
"How is this not embarrassing for the both of us?" you asked on the way there. 
"Why would it be embarrassing?"
"For starters, you're going to a party with your babysitter. And I'm a college student attending a highschool party... What's next? You blackmail me into being your date to prom?"
"You're not my babysitter, I'm yours."
"No you're not."
"How am I not? Mr. Stark made me stay over in his house so you wouldn't be alone! I'm the babysitter!"
"Peter you're like 15, you can't be the babysitter when you're the actual baby!"
"I'm 18."
"Wait you are? Why am I driving then?"
Despite the hard time you were giving him almost the entire time, he convinced you. And now he got to watch you while you chatted with his best friend, holding a cup of punch. 
"How do you even know a girl like that, Penis Parker?" Flash asked him, both of them standing side by side while observing you.
"Well, you know, the Stark internship and all."
"Honestly, I thought she was imaginary. She's not a paid actress, right?"
"Yeah, well no, if I paid her she'd have to be nice to me."
You glanced over to the two of them, smiling lightly when you caught them staring. You've been getting stares the whole night, and it really did feel like you were back in high school. The two boys got flustered when you caught them, turning their heads in opposite directions. You shook your head.
"It was lovely talking to you, Ned. But I have a fanclub to tend to, see you around." you said, placing your hand on Ned's shoulder as a goodbye gesture and walked off to Peter and Flash. 
"Ah, if it isn't my favourite senior!" you said with a giggle, standing next to Peter. The alcohol seemed to be kicking in because you were unexpectedly nice to him. 
"I'm Flash, the host." Flash said and reached out a hand to you. 
You looked at him. You didn't know too much about Flash, only that he didn't like Peter and was giving him a hard time. That was one of the reasons why you agreed to this, to help the poor boy out, stop the bullying for a little while. You blinked a few times, not taking his hand.
"Y\n." you said simply, turning to Peter again. You placed your free hand on his shoulder, scooting over to him so you could get on your tip-toes and whisper into his ear. "So that's the mighty Flash guy? Looks like a loser to me." 
Peter laughed softly at your words, placing a hand on your waist to help you keep your balance. 
"So, how do you like the party guys?" Flash tried to bounce back.
The two of you looked at him. He stared back at you, noticing Peter's hand on your waist that you didn't seem to mind at all. Flash was really feeling like the loser tonight. The guy he constantly bullied came to his party with a college girl. And not just any college girl, one that worked for Stark Industries, and was drop-dead gorgeous on top of it all. And she had Peter Parker's arm wrapped around her.
"For a high school party... it's okay." you said, resting your head on Peter's shoulder. 
"Well I throw the best parties! Peter wouldn't know, he's rarely invited."
"Peter's seen way better parties than this one, I take him to the ones we throw on campus all the time, right Pete?" You lied. You were lying to defend Peter and make him look cooler. 
He nodded to your words. You could practically see Flash's face turn red as he was showed up, once again.
"Whatever." He muttered and walked away.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
The more time you spent with Peter, the harder it got to dislike him. It's not like you really disliked him to begin with, but it annoyed you how absurdly confident he was in the Spider-man suit. He tried flirting as Peter Parker as well, sure, but nothing could compare to Spider-man. And for some reason you hated the fact that he was younger than you. There was nothing morally wrong with liking him, he was 18 and you were just two years older, in perspective this would not matter at all once he got in college, which was about to happen in a few months anyway. Something about the thought of having a high school boyfriend while you were halfway done with your degree really made you cringe. 
But you had to give him credit for trying so hard. The boy just wouldn't give up, no matter how brutal you were every time he tried something. This whole internal conflict of yours was tearing you apart, and it got worse since he moved in for the two weeks. 
"Okay listen." you started as you parked your car in the campus parking lot. "Do not go disappearing on me. And don't drink, not even a sip, you're too young for that. If the police come, run."
"And I thought you were going to have a positive influence on me."
"We're doing this because of you, remember? You were the one who wanted to make Flash shut up by posting a picture from an actual frat party."
"You were the one who lied about that."
"Well, I'm sorry that I was trying to help." 
You got out of the car and locked it after Peter followed. You knew in your heart that this was a very, very bad idea. You were just praying that you wouldn't get drunk enough to do something you'd regret and that he wouldn't get drunk at all. Someone had to drive the two of you back home and it definitely wasn't going to be you. You handed him the car keys before you started walking to the frat house. He put them in his jean pocket, following you like he usually did. Frat parties were nothing like the one Flash threw a few days ago, things here always got out of control. People were taking body shots, smoking, using drugs, making out. The whole "please don't break anything, it's my parents' house" vibe was not there. You knew it, Peter definitely knew it as well. 
"Let's get the pictures and be done with this." you told him over the loud music. 
He nodded, unsure if he actually wanted to stay or leave. He was not a party guy, but he didn't completely hate the experience. You grabbed yourself a drink, greeting a few people you knew from classes. 
"I cannot believe this!" Someone shouted behind you, making you and Peter both turn in sync. It was Lidia, a girl you had a group project with a few weeks back. You texted here and there but you could never make it to places she invited you. 
"Oh hey" you said, hugging the strawberry blonde and smiling. 
"How did you manage to get out of that corporate job you have? And who is this eye candy?" you smiled at Peter, offering her hand to introduce herself. 
"That's Peter Parker, he's my...." you stopped, looking over at him. You started the sentence with the wrong words but it was too late to switch it up.
"Boyfriend." He just had to jump at the opportunity, didn't he?
"He definitely wishes he was." you snapped back at him, looking over at Lidia again. "He's an intern."
"Come on babe, you don't have to be shy about it." 
He was pushing his limits here and enjoying it, smiling at how embarrassed and flustered you'd get trying to deny it. It really made it seem like you were just uncomfortable labeling something you really did have with him and he was taking initiative. 
"Such a shame, if I had locked up a snack like that I would be bragging to the whole world!" Linda said, laughing at your reaction together with Peter. She pulled him closer, whispering in his ear. "I'm not surprised by her act, she doesn't like sharing anything about herself, you have a tough nut to crack."
Lidia left the two of you with an encouraging smile, like you really had something to do with him.
"Traitor." you told him, drinking the entire content of your cup in one breath.
"Wow, take it easy, I'm not carrying you around like last time."
"I'm so mad at you! Why did you say that?"
"Why not? It's not like she'll see me ever again, tell her we broke up next time she asks."
"It was straight up unnecessary!"
He put his hands on your shoulders, lowering himself down on your eye level. 
"You're making a scene right now. Relax, I did it so girls wouldn't flirt with me."
You gave him the death glare that he was so used to seeing.
"Like anyone would flirt with you!"
"Yes, your friend did, the second she saw me."
He was right, she did start her introduction with a flirt, which annoyed you slightly, but it wasn't something you wouldn't get over. 
"Don't try anything with me." you told him. You knew how you got when you were drunk and you'd feel bad if he took advantage of that.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
"Pete?" you knocked on a bedroom door upstairs. No answer. 
You got absolutely hammered after your argument with Peter. He spent the night running after you like a bodyguard because you would wander off somewhere without even saying a word. You did it again, after he told you to stay put so he could go to the bathroom. He said he'd be back in 5 minutes. He was back in 3, but you were gone. Since you had no perception of time while you were drunk, you thought he was gone for more than half an hour and started looking for him. So, the two of you were basically looking for each other at a frat party. You went upstairs, walking in on two or three couples making out or even having sex while looking for him. He, on the other hand, was searching downstairs. He found Lidia and asked her for help, to which she agreed. 
After not having any luck upstairs, you headed straight out of the house before any of them could catch a glimpse of you. Peter tried calling but your phone, along with the car keys, were in his pocket. 
"I'm really starting to get freaked out here." He told Linda as they walked up the stairs together. 
"Look, if we find her here, I'm sorry. If we don't, I'll start to worry as well."
They didn't find you in any of the frat bedrooms which was both good and bad news at the same time. 
"Is there any chance she could have gone home?"
"No, I'm the one driving back. Unless she took a cab, but I doubt that, her phone is here as well."
They walked out of the house, Peter sat on the stairs and pulled at his hair nervously. How did you manage to disappear into thin air in 3 minutes? He was the one supposed to look after you. Lidia sat down next to him, placing her hand on his back and running it up and down for comfort. She leaned closer to him, her body pressing to the side of his. Peter turned his head to look at her but they were interrupted by a familiar fit of laughter. Peter stood up, looking in the direction of the sound when he saw you down the street. One of your arms was holding onto a lampost while you were swinging around it in circles and laughing. 
"Thank god." he said in relief, offering a hand to Lidia. "I present to you, drunk Y\N. One of the funniest people you'll ever meet."
The two of them paced towards you.
"PETEY!" you said, letting go of the lamp. You were dizzy from the spinning and the alcohol but made a few wobbly steps in his direction, so he could catch you just before you fell. You looked up to him and cupped his cheeks with your palms, squishing his face. 
''Here's my little, almost minor wanna-be-boyfriend!" you giggled. 
He turned you around, pressing your back against his chest and wrapped his arms around you so you could face Lidia. She was staring at you in disbelief. 
"My friend! The only one I have. Pete, look, my friend!" you turned your head to Peter and pointed at Lidia. He laughed at you, kissing the top of your head. Peter couldn't help but fall in love with you even harder when you were acting like a toddler that needed attention. 
"You weren't wrong, this is funny." Lidia said after the initial shock was over. 
"Okay, missy, we should probably go home now."
"No!"
"Why not?"
"Because you'll want to kiss!"
"I mean, I always want to kiss you, I don't see your point."
"But there are no people at home!"
"And?"
"There won't be a reason not to kiss!"
"So you're saying what's stopping you from kissing me here are the people?"
"Yes."
"And if there weren't any people around, you would kiss me?"
"No! You would kiss me!"
"I want to kiss you now as well?" Peter and Lidia laughed, making you puzzled. 
"No, you got it wrong!"
"How did I get it wrong?"
"We can't go home because we will kiss."
"Now you're making me want to go home even more."
You thought about it for a second, confused. You looked up at Peter and then at Lidia who were dying from laughter at that point. It got you even more confused than before. 
"Okay, Lidia, it was lovely meeting you, but I need to get her to bed." Peter said after they calmed down. 
"We can't go home!"
"If I promise not to kiss you, can we go home?"
"I guess."
Peter was holding you the whole time but let you go so you could hug your friend goodbye. He didn't want to let go, it was the only time you would ever let him touch you without getting angry at him and he wanted it to last longer, so when you turned to him again, his arm was wrapped around your shoulders as he escorted you to the car.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
You were awfully silent the whole ride back. 
"Are you still worried about me kissing you?" He asked after the two of you got inside.
"No." 
"Then why are you so quiet?" he asked, sitting down on the couch. You sat down next to him, staring at him. He turned his head to look at you, a bit weirded out from your act.
"You're starting to freak me out here."
"Sorry." you mumbled, looking down at your lap now.
You turned your head to look back at him, then down your lap again, and repeated the whole process a few times like a robot that was experiencing a glitch. Peter looked at you with the side of his eyes because he was checking the replies to his instagram stories from the frat party. He turned his head fully towards you, his eyebrows furrowed. Before he could say anything, you leaned in and grabbed the collar of his shirt, pulling him towards you. Your lips crashed together and you gave him the softest, sweetest kiss in his life. He dropped his phone on the floor but he couldn't care less about that right now, his crush was kissing him. His hands grabbed your waist while yours were on his cheeks, your lips dancing together. He tried to pull away because he was uncertain of how much you really wanted this but your teeth dug into his bottom lip and pulled him back in again. 
"Pete" you said softly after the kiss, both of your foreheads pressed against each other's as your hot heavy breaths mixed together.
"Yeah?"
"I wanna do the thing we do in my dreams."
808 notes · View notes
corrodedseraphine · 6 months
Text
you are not alone | one shot
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pairing: steve harrington x fem!reader
story based on a request by a lovely anon: Steve works as a nurse and lives in a two bedroom apartment. He decided to put out an ad for a roommate and the reader finds it. She’s in desperate need of a place to stay after her father dies. It was just the two of them and she has to use almost all the money she makes working to pay off remaining medical bills.
The reader and Steve have a falling out within the first month of her living there but he keeps her around because she pays her part of the rent and keeps to herself. The two of them are usually throwing digs at one another.
Steve doesn’t realize the reader is going through so much financial stress and the loss of her father. She works two jobs (diner and bar) and is gone a lot. However, Steve starts to notice she hardly eats and sleeps and it’s taking a toll on her health.
One night when Steve gets home from his shift at the hospital he finds the reader fell asleep sitting at the bar in the kitchen. He goes up and puts his hand on her back to wake her and she gets startled. Steve steadies her and tries to calm her down. She’s still disoriented and dizzy. Steve carries her to the sofa and tries to check her vitals but she pushes him away. He lectures her for not eating and makes her eat something before letting her go to bed.
A few weeks later the reader gets sick and is really weak, so Steve takes care of her even though she tells him to leave her alone. In her vulnerable state she finally tells Steve what’s been going on.
An enemies to friends type of story with a soft and caring Steve once he realizes she needs help. angst, slight enemies to lovers, and they were roommates trope, fluff in the end, modern!AU
7 830 words
the one shot is also avaliable on ao3
TW: mentions of: death, family member loss
Dear anon, thank you for your request and I really hope you won't be disappointed!
(I know you requested enemies to friends but I made it lovers instead, because the hopeless romantic inside me is desperate, I'm sorry)
steve harrington masterlist | general masterlist
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"Aaand here's for another failed date." Eddie smirked and tilted the shot into his mouth, immediately followed by Robin, Steve and Chrissy.
"I'm so damn tired of this, man." Steve said and slumped helplessly on a soft chair in the corner of the living room. "Everything looks the same, movie, dinner, after dinner we go to my place, have sex and the magic is gone, she sneaks out in the middle of the night and the next day she doesn't answer any messages."
"Maybe you're too desperate?" Robin asked, he sent her a questioning look. "Think about it, it is said that true love comes suddenly and unexpectedly, while you, on the contrary, catch on to anything that moves."
"Robin!" Chrissy jabbed her in the arm.
"What!"
"Be nice!" the blonde rolled her eyes. "Maybe Steve has already met someone who will turn out to be more than a hook-up, and he doesn't know it? Look at us, all through high school we didn't exchange a word with each other, and now I can't imagine a day without your voice." She kissed her girlfriend on the forehead.
"You guys are disgusting." Steve scoffed.
"And you're jealous." replied Robin pulling Chrissy to her and kissing her deeply.
"Ah, ladies! Please spare poor Harrington tonight!" laughed Eddie, filling the glasses anew.
"Thank you, Eddie!" exclaimed the brunette immediately reaching for one. "Can we change the subject?"
"How's your roommate? Doesn't she mind your guests?" asked the metalhead.
"Nope." He waved his free hand and after a moment he brought up a shot. "She's practically not at home at all, and when she comes back it's at night and she sleeps, but when we see each other, exceptionally, she annoys me to the core."
"Why?"
"She constantly walks around fuming, looking at me as if I've committed a crime and getting any word out of her verges on the most miraculous."
"Maybe you made a bad first impression?"
"Then why didn't she refuse when I said she could move in?"
"I don't know, you said she looked desperate."
"It's like I'm living with a ghost who wakes up once every few days and slithers around the apartment in misery."
"Why does it bother you so much that she's quiet?" asked Chrissy suddenly.
"Yeah, blondie is right, I think it's better to have a quiet roommate than to have her be loud, insufferable and pick on everything. Especially the fact that you bring a different girl into your apartment every now and then." Eddie added.
"Oh my God, he's so annoyed because he wants her to talk to him, he wants more than just conversation!" Robin jumped up on the couch as if she had made the discovery of the year. "He likes her!"
"Oh fuck you! All of you!" the other three didn't miss the fact that he didn't deny Robin's theory, but decided to leave the subject for now.
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The first month in the new apartment passed extremely quickly. Actually, you didn't quite feel the effects of moving out. Everything seemed to be behind a fog, and the days flew through your fingers turning into nights, and so on and so forth. The only thing that seemed painfully real was the longing and pain. These were the only things that reminded you that you were alive.
As you danced with a tray between tables at a nearby diner from early morning, and later in the evening served drinks to enamored couples at the bar, you didn't have much time to mourn. But that didn't change the fact that the void left in your life was heavy. As heavy as your eyelids, which began to close at the mere sight of your bed. Usually you don't even remember the moment you fall asleep, but today it wasn't so easy.
When you saw that the beginning nurse was looking for a roommate you thought you had managed to find someone calm and quiet. Unfortunately, reality turned out to be different. The frequent sounds of pleasure coming from his bedroom were not usually a problem for you, you quickly learned to simply ignore them or drown them out with music or a podcast. Nor were you bothered by the frequent visits of his friends, who brought chaos and disorder every time, not caring about the silence. Most of the time you weren't in the apartment at all because you were at work, but today they decided to have a movie night, which started with an argument about the choice of movie. Knowing that you wouldn't fall asleep with such entertainment, you exasperatedly got out of bed pulling on your sweatpants.
When you left the room everyone went silent and looked at you. You could see from their faces that they were just waiting for you to start shouting at them, but even though you really wanted to do it at that moment, you didn't have the strength. Exhausted after several hours of hard work as always, you didn't have the strength to do anything, so you passed them without a word, ignoring their attempts to say hello and offers to join them, and left the apartment. With a quick step, you went to the pharmacy located near your apartment, stocked up on a new pack of sleeping pills and went back to your place.
"Hey, y/n!" called out one of the younger boys, from what you associated was probably named Dustin. "Can you help us choose? Iron Man or the Amazing Spider-Man?"
You just rolled your eyes and, leaving him without an answer, went back to your room slamming the door behind you. Taking your pills you started getting ready for sleep again.
Lying in the darkness you listened to the conversation of Steve and his friends.
"See? She can't even say one word, I honestly can barely remember what her voice sounds like!" he said irritated.
"Come on, she looked tired." replied a female voice.
"Tired or not, she could at least answer! Out of politeness!"
"Let's just start the movie."
Then the voices quieted, and your thoughts grew louder. You thought about yourself from a few months ago.
The former you would have answered Dustin's question without hesitation and gladly accepted the invitation to join.
The former you would have been able to chat for hours with Steve from the very beginning and not push away every possible interaction on his part.
You knew it irritated him, he couldn't hide it. Every attempt to have any kind of conversation with you ended in failure, every attempt to get to know you better - spurned. You were not surprised by it. You were sure that the former you and your new roommate would get along very well. It's even possible that the former you would have noticed how his honey-colored eyes curiously followed you when you left the room, maybe she would have noticed the charming smile he sent you during the first days of your living together, and would have appreciated his willingness and interest in you. It is likely that the former you would also have taken an interest in Steve's person, in many ways. However, the former you no longer existed.
The present you was overtired and there was not a shred of energy in her.
The present you had far bigger worries than the handsome boy sitting behind the wall, whose sweet smiles turned into grimaces of annoyance and disgust.
Holding back the tears that rushed to your eyes, you looked at your phone. Six hours of sleep. You snuggled your face into your pillow hoping to fall asleep as soon as possible thanks to the pills. Lately, every minute of sleep was at a premium for you.
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Days passed and the tension between you and Steve grew. He was irritated by the lack of willingness to communicate on your part, and you were irritated by the fact that he was irritated. Without actually saying too many words to each other, sometimes one unpleasant glance was enough for one or both of you to feel a strange surge of negative emotions. The climax turned out to be Saturday, when you were getting ready for your evening shift at the bar.
You were walking through the living room holding a glass of Coke in your hand when you tripped over one of the nursing textbooks scattered on the floor. A moment later, all that was heard was the sound of glass on the floor and a rather hard fall.
"What the fuck Steve?!" you exclaimed, looking down at your soaked clothes.
"What happened?" he ran out of the bathroom.
"I tripped over your stupid book! Is it so hard to clean up after yourself?"
"I'm studying, I just went to the bathroom for a moment!"
"And leaving your books on the floor was a great idea!" you said standing up.
"If you had watched where you were going nothing would have happened!" he tried to defend himself.
"If you had kept things in order then nothing would have happened!"
"How could I have known that just now you would mercifully leave the room?! I'm used to you not leaving it for a second!"
"Go to Hell Harrington!" you yelled.
"Feels like I am already in it!" he yelled back, grabbed his books and went to his room.
Angry, you changed your clothes and picked up the glass, then quickly mopped the floor after the spilled drink.
Despite the fact that you had already left the apartment and left him alone in it, Steve felt bad about this whole situation. He didn't know quite whether he was angry, disappointed or tired. Sitting over textbooks for several hours never worked well for him, and arguing with you made him even more upset.
Sighing deeply, he grabbed his phone, where a Tinder notification popped up on the screen. The beautiful long-haired blonde on the screen was smiling broadly at him, he didn't even remember when he swiped her to the right. Each successive match on the app was more and more meaningless to him, despite the fact that he could spend hours there looking for "the one". Eventually everything started to blend together, he could no longer remember what he was saying to whom and what he wasn't, remembering names wasn't his advantage either. He looked at the girl's profile for a while longer, but he decided that he definitely didn't feel like going on a date tonight. Instead he went to the kitchen and took out a full bottle of rum from the refrigerator. Putting it by his face, he took a picture and sent it to the group chat.
Steve the Stupidest: wanna join?
Eddie the Dumbest: my place in 20 minutes?
Chrissy the Sweetest: count us in!
Robin the Smartest: do we need to bring something?
Eddie the Dumbest: your asses to my house lol
Eddie the Dumbest: and snacks
Eddie the Dumbest: I won't let you in without snacks
"You told her that living with her is like living in hell?" Chrissy asked shocked.
"I didn't say it directly! I just said it felt that way!" Steve tried to defend himself. The bottle of rum was emptied in no time and, as standard, Steve brought the tracks back to you.
"Which is exactly the same as if you literally said 'Life with you is like hell." Robin rolled her eyes and threw popcorn at him.
"The real question is do you really feel that way?" asked Eddie.
"No." he answered without thinking. "But it's not heaven either! I don't know what it is, no one gets on my nerves like she does, but I on the other hand..." he didn't finish the sentence.
"I'm still of the opinion that you like her but for some strange reason you're acting like an eight-year-old and instead of admitting it, you're telling yourself that all you feel is annoyance." Robin said.
"I think you two would make an adorable couple." interjected Chrissy.
"Until she would kill me with a single stare." If the relationship between you two was better and more friendly, maybe he wouldn't even try to deny Robin's words.
"You're not in Heaven or Hell, so you could say you're roommates from Purgatory," laughed Eddie. "The only question is which way you'll go, up or down?"
"I have a strange feeling it's going dooown."
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Even if the disagreement between you was still present, Steve had no plans to kick you out of the apartment. You always paid everything on time, did not interfere in his life, and, apart from occasional exchanges of words, did not cause any major problems. Over time, however, the atmosphere of irritation began to fade and was replaced by an acceptance of the fact that there would not even be a friendship between you. Not wanting to get in each other's way, you communicated with one another only on necessary matters.
That didn't change the fact that Steve was still observing you, and what he saw was beginning to worry him. Your pale face, blackened eyes and hunched posture betrayed your physical exhaustion. He also noticed that you weren't preparing any meals for yourself at all. In fact, he probably hadn't seen you cook anything once yet since you moved in. Sometimes when he prepared food for himself he would specifically make more to see if you would take what was left, but you never did a single time.
The autumn weather was not one of the best, it was definitely the type of weather during which the only thing to do was to wrap up in a warm blanket, turn on a favorite TV series and drink a big mug of hot chocolate. That was the plan that popped into Steve's head when he walked into the apartment after a long and tiring shift at the hospital.
Putting down his rain-wet umbrella in the hallway, he pulled off his jacket and hung it on a hanger. To his surprise, your jacket was also hanging there. This surprised him because you were always still at work at this hour. Walking deeper into the apartment he saw you sitting at the kitchen counter, your hands and head were resting on its surface. Without saying hello, he entered the kitchen and opened the refrigerator, thinking only about the chicken salad he had made yesterday. When out of the corner of his eye he didn't notice any movement on your part he turned to look at you. Only from this perspective could he see that you were asleep. In your numb hand thete was a mug of tea.
"Y/n?" he asked quietly. You didn't respond. He slowly took the mug out of your hand. The tea in it was already cold. How long had you been sitting there like this? Concerned, he placed his hand on your back and repeated your name several more times.
Awakened, you jumped up on the bar stool almost falling off it, fortunately your roommate reacted quickly enough to prevent this and hold you up.
"Hey, it's just me, just Steve." he said, and furrowed his brow. His voice was calm and a little quieter than usual. "Are you all right? Are you feeling sick?" he asked, and instinctively began to bring his hand closer to your forehead to check for signs of fever, but you, seeing this, immediately pulled away and jumped off the stool. This, unfortunately, was not the best idea, as you were still disoriented by your sudden awakening, and prolonged fatigue and irregular, not very hearty meals definitely weakened your body causing dizziness, which you also felt now and lost your balance.
"Woah!" the brunette once again grabbed your shoulders protecting you from falling. "Come on, sit down on the couch." this time without objection you moved towards the couch which stood nearby, due to the fact that your living room was connected to the kitchen. Steve followed you step by step supporting you. He kept one hand on your back and the other on your arm. "Are you sick? dizzy?" he began to ask when you sat down.
"I'm fine, Steve, just tired." you said, hoping he would give you a break. Meanwhile, a gurgling sound came from your stomach.
"And probably hungry." he raised one eyebrow.
"Just want to go to sleep." you scoffed.
"I have some chicken salad left over, I won't be able to eat it all myself, and it would be a shame to throw it away, maybe you'd like some?" he offered, carefully watching your reaction. He was increasingly convinced that during the day you either eat nothing, or so little that your body can barely manage to provide you with any energy to function. However, given your distant relationship, he couldn't just bombard you with questions and force you to eat like he would have done with Robin or Dustin. He had to do it slowly and calmly.
"Yeah, okay." you said quietly as the gurgling of your stomach resounded a second time.
He immediately went back to the fridge and quickly put the food on plates hoping you wouldn't notice that you got a larger portion. Handing you a plate, he sat down next to you and turned on the TV, the sound of which filled the silence between you.
"That was really good, thank you." you said quietly.
"No problem, I'm glad I didn't have to throw it away." he smiled slightly. "Feeling better?" he asked.
In response, you only nodded your head. You got up from the couch and picked up the plates to wash them, his eyes were following your movements to the kitchen.
Watching you, he thought about the fact that this was your first meal together since you moved in. Satisfied with the result that it didn't end in an argument or that you didn't reject his offer, he felt a little more confident. This small success pushed him forward, so when you started washing the dishes, he decided to take a chance.
"What did you eat at work today?" the question knocked you out a bit.
"Why do you ask?"
"I'm just curious." He shrugged his shoulders, but you didn't see it because you were standing with your back turned.
"A sandwich." you replied not thinking much. You felt strange with the fact that this was your first conversation not about bills or household chores. The first one you had actually allowed him to have.
"Only?"
"I didn't have time at work to eat."
"One sandwich all day? Are you crazy? You need to eat more!" And so much for calmness and slowness. He knew he shouldn't get carried away and didn't want it to sound like an attack, but unfortunately it was too late. Why did he care this much about you awnyway? All the walls that you lowered down for that brief moment rose again.
"I'm fine." you said dryly clenching your teeth.
"I found you sleeping on the kitchen counter, it's obvious that you're overtired and hardly eat anything at all, do you even take care of yourself in any way?"
"It's none of your business." Suddenly all the fatigue is gone from you, replaced, by anger, instead. Who did he think he was to lecture you?
"You are irresponsible." he concluded and got up from the couch.
"Just shut up, Steve, you're not my father to lecture me." You replied in an overtired voice.
"Then maybe you should call him and make him realize that his daughter can't take care of herself!" He was already heading towards his room, but suddenly, he was stopped by the clatter of dishes. He noticed how your shoulders were moving faster and faster, picking up the pace of your breathing. You turned off the water and, without a word, walked away from the sink, standing straight in front of him. Your eyes were big and full of tears, looking at him with a condemning gaze.
"You have no right to say that." You said through your teeth and, without waiting for an answer, disappeared into your room, leaving him alone in a big shock.
That night, instead of his favorite TV series, all he could focus on were the quiet sobs coming from behind the wall and the guilt they caused. He had no idea which of his actions made you cry, and it didn't really matter which. Despite the fact that, in his opinion, he didn't say anything awful in your direction, he felt awful.
Steve the Stupidest: I made her cry
Chrissy the Sweetest: what???? what happened?
Steve the Stupidest: I don't know, we were eating salad together, I asked her what she had eaten at work, she said that only a sandwich, so I got a little carried away and told her that she can't take care of herself, and now I can hear her crying
Robin the Smartest: oh damn
Steve the Stupidest: should I go to her?
Eddie the Dumbest: I don't think she wants to see you now, dude
Robin the Smartest: Eddie is right, let her calm down
Robin the Smartest: and tell everything that happened with details
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Autumn brings with itself many changes, one of which may be unexpected illness. The first thing you felt this morning was an unpleasant itching in your throat, the second was a terrible cold, which made you decide to dress a little warmer for work today. Unfortunately, you felt worse and worse by the minute, but adult life can be brutal and you couldn't just not go to work today.
Around noon Steve came home from the hospital, but before he could open the door to the apartment his phone vibrated in his pocket.
"Hello?"
"Come to Benny's, quick." Robin said in a serious voice.
When he arrived in front of the diner, Chrissy was waiting for him with a worried expression on her face.
"What happened?" he asked running up to the girl.
"y/n fainted, Robin and I came in for lunch and when she was carrying our order she just fainted, she said there was no one to help her so Robin said we'll call you-" the words left her mouth at the speed of light.
"Hey, take it easy." he grabbed her by the shoulders. "Where is she?"
"In the back room with Robin and Benny."
With a quick step he walked inside and moments later he was already at your side watching you with a worried face. You looked even worse than last time, which caused him alarmed. Sitting leaning against the white wall, you were almost as pale as it was.
"Let's get you home, okay?" he asked crouching down in front of you.
"I don't have a home." you muttered while burying your face in your hands. "I can't leave, my shift hasn't ended."
"It has ended and the next one won't start until you feel better." said Benny in a harsh tone.
"Benny please." you whined.
"No discussion, get her out of here Steve."
Reluctantly, you walked back to his BMW feeling the gaze of the other three on you all the time, but now you didn't even have the strength to be annoyed with them. Despite the fact that your shift at the diner ended a few hours sooner, you still had to go to your evening shift at the bar, so you wanted to be in your room as soon as possible so you could take a nap before that.
You didn't even remember when you fell asleep, you were pulled out of the darkness by the sound of your alarm clock, which announced that it was time to start getting ready for your shift at the bar. The worst part of it all was that you didn't feel any better.
Slowly and lifelessly you walked out of the room, Steve was standing in the kitchen over a big pot of soup. When he heard the sound of the door opening he turned toward you and smiled slightly.
"I made the soup, the best for a cold, I got the recipe from Robin's grandmother, I'm sure you'll like it, it just needs to boil for a while," he said.
"I'm not hungry." you lied, at the very smell you were drooling but you didn't have time to eat anymore.
"Come on, at least try."
"I don't have time Steve, I have to get ready and go to work." you sighed.
"You're kidding right?" He stood motionless and looked at you in disbelief, and you looked at him with a questioning expression. "A few hours ago you blacked out and now you want to go to work, are you crazy?"
"Don't dramatize."
"Dramatize? Listen to yourself, what's wrong with you?"
"Everything!" you snapped. "Not everyone has a wonderful life full of friends and and rich parents who transfer dollars to your account every month! Do you think life makes me happy? Some people have to work two shifts to make their own living! Some people have other expenses besides just living!" your outburst of anger made you feel increasingly weak, but your voice was still loud. Loud enough for every word to reach him without interference. "You work in a hospital, so you know how much medical bills cost! So I'm sorry Steve, but I won't eat your soup, I have to go to work so I can afford to pay your rent next month!"
Shaken up, you walked into the bathroom and slammed the door behind you. Why does it all have to be so difficult? Clenching your eyes tightly, a loud sob came from your mouth. Much louder than you wanted. Helplessly you slumped to the floor and just let the tears flow. You were sick, tired, sad, angry and lost, everything was against you.
After a while, the bathroom door opened and Steve appeared in it with a broken look on his face.
"I'm sorry." He said, kneeling beside you.
"It's not your fault." you said while wiping away tears. "Everything is just too much."
"I didn't know anything about the hospital bills, are you ill? do you need funding for treatment?" honey eyes studied your face carefully, the warmth that emanated from him made you want to cling to him.
"They are not mine."
"Are you paying for someone?" he asked puzzled.
"My dad was very sick-" you said quietly.
"Was?"
Nothing was your answer. The pain in your eyes spoke for itself.
"Jesus, y/n…" before he could think what he was doing his arms had already begun to embrace you, and you let him. You felt as if he was keeping you from falling apart. After a while, your breathing slowed down, and your body was no longer shaken by waves of crying. "I'm so fucking sorry, I didn't know anything." he muttered into your hair.
"I really have to go to work, Steve." you replied weakly, already a bit calmer.
"You can't go there like this, you're all burned up."
"If I don't go I won't be able to pay you on time." You sighed and extricated yourself from his grasp.
"You'll pay me later, it won't be a problem." he replied without thinking. "Stay, please." he said seeing your uncertain reaction. "I swear that if you pay later, nothing will happen. It won't be a problem."
"Thank you." you replied. "I'll go call that I won't be there."
"And I'll get us some soup." he beamed. His smile was contagious as it also appeared on your face despite your nasty mood. When you returned to the living room there were two large bowls filled to the brim on the coffee table.
"Fancy a movie?" he asked.
"Yeah, okay." you replied surprised, you weren't expecting this proposal. Although he was probably even more surprised and didn't expect you to agree. "What are we going to watch?"
"I don't know, what do you like?"
"And you?" you asked, not wanting to impose something of your own.
"Star Wars?"
"I've never watched, it can be."
"Wait, what? Seriously, it's a classic!"
"Such a film connoisseur of you?" you laughed.
"You still haven't answered my question about what you like."
"Disney is definitely my definition of comfort movies."
"for example?"
"Beauty and the Beast, Princess and the Frog, Tangled, Coco…"
"I haven't watched any of them." he shrugged his shoulders.
"And who's talking about not knowing the classics?!" you pretended to be disgusted.
"I propose a compromise, one part of Star Wars for one Disney movie, I think we both have a lot of catching up to do."
"Deal."
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Steve Harrington was a ray of sunshine. From the moment you decided to stop fencing yourself off with thick curtains your life became much warmer and brighter. Your life together changed completely, even though you still had to work two shifts and felt physically tired, your mental state was definitely relieved. When your roommate got to know your situation and understood what you were struggling with, his attitude also changed. This time, all the quiet days and sad looks were not perceived as an attack. Instead, whenever you returned tired after work there was a warm meal waiting for you and an even warmer smile that caused a strange tingling in your stomach.
The more you got to know each other, the more you couldn't hold back the feeling of attraction to him. He was a person from whom a safe warmth radiated, a warmth that not only warmed your cold hands when they accidentally touched his, but also your soul. A soul that had long been a cold and empty hollow. He lit the first tiny sparks in it that made life and emotions awaken in you anew.
By opening up to his presence in your life, you found the courage to grieve. He was the perfect friend. Funny, caring and trustworthy. Day by day you got to know each other better and better, telling him about what happened with your dad you allowed in the feelings that you had kept locked up for an awfully long time.
One day was especially difficult when your dad's birthday arrived. All day the weight of your heart was unbearable, people at work gave you an extremely hard time, so as soon as you closed the apartment door behind you, you burst into tears. Some time ago you would have held it in until you disappeared into your room, but you couldn't help how Steve made the house become home. A home where you didn't have to be afraid to show your feelings.
Hearing you groggy in the hallway he immediately came out to greet you, wanting to show off the new dish he had managed to prepare today. Unfortunately, seeing your condition, all his enthusiasm disappeared.
"What happened?" he asked quietly. His eyes scanned your entire body in search of any apparent reason for crying, but he immediately understood that what was hurting you was not a physical issue at all. Not having the strength to respond you moved quickly in front of him and he simply followed you. You sat down on the bed clenching your face in your hands, after a while the mattress bent under his weight.
"Hey, it's okay." he whispered placing a hand on your shoulder. "Come." He pulled you gently back.
Leaning against the headrest of the bed, he pulled you close, and you fell right into his arms. You cuddled your face into the soft sweater sobbing like a small child. Large hands gently traced paths of comfort on your back and arms. He stroked you as if you were a small, wounded and helpless animal, and he wanted at all costs not to hurt you even more. Your pain was breaking his heart, but he knew the feeling when crying is the only thing that can bring relief, so he didn't interrupt you.
Over the past time, he got to know you much better than he ever would have expected. He saw in you something more than a silent energy filled with fatigue and perpetual irritation. He saw in you a beautiful but broken soul. He saw a heart of gold that was shattered to pieces. He saw how funny you were and what a great conversation companion you could be. He was surprised by your sensitivity, which you initially hid under a mask of oppressiveness. When you broke down the armored wall you surrounded yourself with at the beginning of your acquaintance, Steve met a completely different person, someone in whom he was beginning to see more than just a roommate. With each step you continued to become friends, but he couldn't ignore the thought that he wanted something more.
From people who avoided each other like fire you became a team. You did everything together as much as possible when you both happened to find some free time. Meals together, cleaning together and going shopping together. Movie marathons and evenings spent talking all added up to the beauty of domestication. But-
What if you could lay cuddled up together while watching movies?
What if he could kiss every tear from your cheeks that fall when you get emotional at a Disney movie?
What if you could come up from behind and snuggled into his back while he was preparing dinner for you?
What if while shopping he could hold a shopping bag in one hand and your hand in the other one?
What if seeking comfort in his arms after a hard day at work was the first thing you would do when you got home?
All the what ifs in his head had been swirling around for a long time and were incredibly overwhelming, especially when you were close, yet he couldn't muster the courage to do more.
For the moment, you had more serious things on your mind, and he didn't know how to help you, despite his great desire to do so. Lost in his thoughts and focused to give you as much comfort as possible, he didn't notice when you calmed down. Your breathing was now even and your eyes closed. Thinking you had fallen asleep he settled down a bit and rested his cheek against the top of your head. With the hand that he used to embrace your back he pressed you even tighter against him, and with the other he grabbed the hand that lay on his chest.
"Today is his birthday." you said weakly.
Not expecting you to be awake for a moment panic swept through him, he quickly drew in air and tensed all over waiting for your reaction. Seeing that you still remained motionless, he relaxed, and you continued speaking. "Every year we used to spend this whole day with his best friend and his family. They invited me to join them today to continue the tradition, but I can't- It hurts too much."
"You don't have to go there if you don't feel ready, it's understandable to feel that way." he replied.
"What if I'm never ready? What if it will always hurt like this?"
"Even if time doesn't heal the wounds, you will learn to live with them. And even though moments like now will happen from time to time, you won't be alone with them. You are not alone."
His words went straight to your heart, they were something you needed at that moment.
"Thank you." You said hugging him even tighter.
"Always here for you." he muttered.
The silence that surrounded you and the last rays of the setting sun coming through the window were soothing. Your hearts began to beat out the same calm and steady rhythm that you could feel under your hand. Focusing on the gentle beats, a peace began to envelop you that you hadn't felt since your dad became ill. As the orange glow of the ending day slowly turned into blanketing darkness neither of you wanted to move so as not to scare away such a beautiful and peaceful moment. Desperately clinging to the closeness that existed between you both fell asleep, not worrying about the awkwardness that would come with the morning.
Unfortunately, the night passed all too quickly. When you woke up you were lying in bed alone. Trying to run away from the feeling of disappointment about this, you reluctantly pushed the quilt aside and focused on preparing for work. Entering the living room, you were greeted by a platter of warm scrambled eggs and a mug of coffee.
"I'm going on the night shift tonight, so I thought maybe we could at least have breakfast together." he said sitting down at the table.
"Sounds like a great plan." You replied with a smile. Over the course of the meal you lost yourself in pleasant conversation about everyday life. Steve also talked about his plans for the weekend, where he wanted to take Dustin to a concert by his favorite band.
"And uh- I have something for you." he said when you finished eating. He walked over to his backpack and took out some documents from it, which he slipped to you. "You don't have to do anything with this, but I thought you might want to think about it. I talked to some people at the hospital and they said your situation qualifies for a subsidy on your dad's medical bills." You looked at him with your eyes wide open, he couldn't make out much emotion from your expression, which made him start to get nervous, fearing that you were about to explode with anger. "I know, I'm sorry I talked to strangers about you, you have the right to be angry with me, but I really just wanted to help, this subsidy will cover most of the bills, of course if you need help to figure it all out, I can help you with everything, but I understand if you don't want-"
His rant was interrupted by your arms tightening around his stomach. When the moment of surprise passed he reciprocated the hug.
"Thank you." you said.
"You are welcome." He beamed.
"Let's talk about it tomorrow after we're both off work?""
"Sure." The smile didn't leave his face.
"I have to go now, thank you for breakfast. Have a good day, Steve."
"You too, y/n."
For him, it was the win of the day.
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When taking on the job as a nurse, Steve was aware that some moments would be extremely hard in the job. However, he did not expect them to come so quickly and suddenly. Nor did he expect that the first such moment would be so drastic.
Road accidents were the order of the day, so when he got the call to assist in the operation of one of the injured he approached it with composure as always. What he didn't expect, however, was to find a teenage girl lying on the table in critical condition. Despite the best efforts of the entire rescue team, the injuries sustained in the accident were too extensive and she died during the operation. On his way out of the room, all he could hear was the shrill cry of despair of a mother who would never hug her own daughter again. That sound refused to leave his head until the end of his shift.
After returning home, exhausted by today's experiences, he fell asleep on the couch. Unfortunately, even in sleep his psyche was not merciful. His brain replayed nightmares over and over again, which, instead of resting, tormented him even more.
When you returned to the apartment the first thing you noticed was Steve sleeping on the couch. Today, for the first time in a very long time, he was not waiting for you with a meal ready. Determining that he was probably too tired, you quietly walked over to the couch and covered him with a blanket. Your attention did not miss the furrowed brow and the anxious expression on his face. Hesitating for a moment, you decided not to intervene and went to the kitchen, stating that today it was your turn to cook something. In the middle of cutting vegetables, Steve suddenly jumped on the couch breathing heavily.
"Hey, what's going on?" you quickly walked over to him and crouched down across from him. He was in shock, his eyes in a panic trying to recognize the environment he was in, and his breathing was speeding up instead of slowing down. "Steve, hey." you tried to get his attention.
"My phone. Where's my phone?" he sprang to his feet and began a frantic search for the device. He found it in his jacket pocket and immediately started dialing a number. "Dustin? Dustin are you okay?" he asked after a few beeps.
"Yes, why?" replied the confused boy.
"I just- I'm sorry. Glad you are okay."
"What the hell Steve?"
"I have to go, bye." He hung up and clasped his hand around the phone while leaning his head against the wall.
"Steve?" approached him slowly. "What's going on?"
"It's just a hard day at work…" He sighed.
"Do you want to talk about it?"
He nodded and together you went to sit on the couch. There he told you about the situation. The longer he spoke, the more his voice broke down and words struggled to pass through his throat.
"When I was sleeping, I had-I had a nightmare. Instead of this girl, there was Dustin. I had to make sure he was okay-" it was his breaking point.
The sight was painful. It was hard to look at a person who can bring so much warmth, light and joy into someone's life in a state of sadness. Steve was like sunshine to you, sunshine that was now covered by dark clouds and raindrops that dripped down his cheeks. Before you had time to think your body reacted faster, and you were already halfway to hugging him. He accepted this form of reassurance without hesitation, and, drawing you closer to him, you landed in his lap, while he snuggled his face into the bend of your neck.
"I'm so sorry you had to go through all this." you said quietly stroking his hair. "And Dustin is fine, he is fine, you are not gonna lose him."
"I can't lose him-"
"And you won't." You didn't let him finish his sentence. You moved him away from you so that you could look at each other and took his face in your hands, wiping away the tear tracks with your thumbs. "And remember that you are not alone with your problems Steve Harrington, and you will not be alone."
Honey-colored irises looked right through your soul. However, after a while they began to take a different course. Slowly and uncertainly they went along your nose to stop at your lips. Suddenly his hands, which were now on the indentation of your waist, began to burn. Yet it was not a painful burning. The warmth was addictive, you wanted to feel more of it, you wanted to feel it all over your body. Your foreheads rested against each other and your noses brushed, lips were separated by millimeters when the magic was interrupted by his phone.
Like a burnt woman, you jumped off his lap, and he went to his room with the phone, not knowing how to deal with what had just happened between you.
Would you let him kiss you?
This thought focused all his attention, and all he understood from his conversation with his supervisor was that tomorrow was his day off.
"Would you mind going for a walk?" you asked when he returned to the living room.
"Sure."
The autumn air was not the hottest, but the warm sweaters you were wearing adequately protected you from it. The setting sun was a beautiful orange color quite like the leaves quietly crunching under your shoes. Steve wordlessly followed you, not even focusing on the road. Walking in your company seemed to be a good cure for shattered nerves, especially since the scenery was equally soothingly beautiful. On the way to your destination, you made a brief stop at a flower shop, not far from the cemetery. At that moment he knew what your destination was.
"It's okay if you don't feel like going there." You said stopping in front of the gate.
"No, it's fine." he replied and moved ahead.
"This place…I found a weird peace in here for the first few days after my dad died." you explained as you approached the grave. You placed a flower on it.
Steve did not respond. But you were right, the place was surrounded by a strange atmosphere of calm. The falling nightfall sharpened the burning candles. Their rays were small but warm, and together they created a solemn scenery. He associated the flames with the emotions you stirred in his heart. Emotions that were bubbling up inside him and begging him to let them out. Emotions that he no longer had the strength to keep inside, and despite the fact that the cemetery was the last place to confess love, he decided to do so.
"Thank you." he said finally.
"For what?" you asked turning your face toward him.
"Letting me in."
"Thank you for being patient enough." The smile with which you answered this was also as warm as the lights burning in front of you.
"I think I'm falling in love with you."
He expected shock, anger, laughter on your part. He expected each of the worst reactions. However, he did not expect the calmness with which you accepted what he said. He didn't expect your hand intertwining your fingers and the other landing gently on his cheek.
"I think I'm falling in love with you too, Steve." you whispered.
That was enough for him to lean in and bring your lips together. The kiss, at first shy and gentle, deepened into something passionate and filled with relief that something that was supposed to have happened a long time ago was finally happening. It was as if everything had suddenly found its rightful place in the universe.
As you pulled away from each other, he spun you around so that your back rested against his chest and your arms locked in a bear hug. With a wide smile and tears of happiness in your eyes, you looked at your father's grave.
"Thank you." you said quietly.
"It's me who thanks you." he whispered in your ear.
"It wasn't to you." you giggled, and he made a confused sound. "It was to Dad."
"Oh."
"He placed a real angel in my path." You didn't have to wait long for a response. After a while, you were face to face again giving each other kisses interrupted by smiles.
"Let's go home." you whispered between kisses.
"Home?" he asked with hope in his voice.
"Home." You confirmed by kissing him again.
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taglist: @i-me-mine @phantypurple @tlclick73
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periprose · 6 months
Note
Ps5 Peter Parker x reader inspired by this?
It's one of my favorite MerDer moments on Grey's anatomy 🙈😭
Peter explains something about physics or an idea for a gagdet...
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🤣 this image really cracked me up lol thanks for the ask!! I've set the fic to take place in the first game, Peter and Reader are Otto's assistants at Octavius Industries. Please ignore the science mumbo jumbo in this fic.
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/
Otto's lab was really cold this time of year. He barely had the funds to make rent in Manhattan, let alone provide optimal heating and other luxuries.
Still, you shiver, searching through your locker for your comfy, oversized jumper. You're just pulling it on when Peter pops up from behind you.
"Hey."
"Jesus!" You flinch and then rub your eyes. "Hey, Peter. How do you get behind me so fast? That's the third time this month I didn't even see you come in."
"Uh... I just have good reflexes, I think." Peter's mouth twists a little, as he tries not to laugh at your jumper. "Are you sure that's up to lab standards? Where's your lab coat?"
"Ah, Otto doesn't mind. He knows I'm cold." You explain, and Peter sighs.
"Well, he never gives me special treatment."
"Probably because you're not as cute as I am." You joke, but Peter nods and you feel a callous level of attraction towards him for being so nonchalant in terms of flirting.
You never really know where you stand with the guy. He's a naturally witty person and you refuse to read into anything any deeper, just for self preservation.
"Hey, I can't disagree with that." Peter laughs that quiet, soft laugh that makes you smile on your own. "Here, I got you a cup of coffee. That should help warm you up."
You look down and see, sure enough, Peter's holding a coffee cup tray, loaded with three cups, surely your usual orders- for you, extra black espresso to stay awake, for Peter, usually some kind of healthy tea hybrid, and for Otto, a large, creamy Italian coffee blend that's particularly expensive (Peter always jokes that Otto wastes funding on things like this).
"Oh, I'll pay you back." You reach back into your locker for your wallet, but Peter stops you with a raise of his hand.
"It's free of charge. No worries." He hands you the cup gently, and your hand skirts across his. You think for a moment.
"Nothing is ever really 'free of charge', Peter." You give him a side glance. In the last couple of months you've known this guy, you've figured out when he has an ulterior motive.
"... Alright, alright. You got me." Peter starts pulling you along by the hand, towards one of Otto's offices filled with white-boards and desks and equipment. You take a sip of your coffee and notice that it's still quite hot- Peter must've been really fast to make it so.
Not that you're complaining, and now that you're warmer you do feel more inclined to listen to him.
"Okay. You know how Otto's neural interface for the experimental arms have been glitching out?" Peter's got a firm look on his face, as you sit and listen.
"Yeah. It's a poor prototype, I think he asked us to leave it alone? He said he'd deal with it." You shrug. "I've moved on to his requests for a tighter, stronger arm. You know I deal with hardware."
"Yes, but even so, the neural interface problem still persists. Otto's lying." Peter looks at the whiteboard, and sees that half of it is covered all over with erratically drawn diagrams and equations. It's fine, he knows he can write what he needs in that space.
"Okay, look." Peter begins drawing a diagram of the neural interface's circuitry. "See how the voltage is really high?"
"Yeah- but isn't that what Doc wanted?" You grimace. "Last time I brought up the voltage issue, he told me to mind my business and continue with soldering. He wants so much power for some reason."
"Right, that's what I'm talking about. Notice how Otto keeps having those outbursts?" Peter sighs, a deeply upsetting look overtaking him. "He's getting a bit aggressive as of late, and I think it's because he can't figure this out."
"You're telling me. Just yesterday he chewed me out for clocking in a bit late." You sniff. "Okay, I was fifteen minutes late, but still."
"I've been there, you don't even have to justify it." Peter laughs, and begins drawing squiggly lines. You can't help but notice how his strangely muscular arms are tense and visible through his lab coat as he scrawls, and you take a sip of your coffee, savoring the view. Looking isn't illegal, you try to rationalize, but you quickly banish these thoughts as Peter looks back with a sly glance, to make sure you're paying attention.
"This is the electricity flow... and it should be heading this way, but the neural interface is made incorrectly and the flow of energy is heading back this way... towards the-"
"The battery of the arms, not the interface." You suddenly realize, and take a scrap piece of paper off the desk, scribbling down notes. "Hmm... maybe the wiring used for the arms is absorbing too much energy? Or the batteries are too big?"
"Maybe, but neural interfaces are tricky business." Peter winces as Otto yells at something in the background of the lab. "I told Otto not to get too involved with it- it's far too easy to accidentally mess with your brain, and then suddenly you've got anger issues or worse-"
"Dementia." You finish his sentence with an equally grim expression. "Okay. I hear you, but how are we supposed to fix it, exactly? I can only think of using different, smaller wires, or a less cost heavy battery- but then it won't move at the speed Otto wants it to."
"Yeah." Peter's shoulders slump a little, and you feel bad. He's always just one dude trying to take on the entire world's problems.
"Peter, it's not your problem, really. You can only do so much- the man has made up his mind, he's going to have to take the brunt of the problem." You try to console him, but Peter has that determined Parker Pride you've seen far too often, and you know he's not going to let it go.
"Wait, wait. Okay..." Peter starts frantically drawing on the board, and seeing that he's running out of space, without missing a beat, begins to draw on the wall.
"Peter! You're drawing on the wall!" You admonish him, and to your shock and utter horror, but not to your surprise, he keeps going. "Now you've completely lost it- it'll take two seconds to erase the board-"
But Peter isn't listening, in that overly stubborn, inventor way that you know you've done before. He's too lost in his own thoughts, and you know that spark will disappear if he takes a moment to stop drawing.
"I'll clean it. It's fine. We got to get a move on." Peter points to the new diagram on the wall. "Look at this."
Peter's drawn a rudimentary depiction of the robotic arm prototypes you've built for Otto, but the battery pack has been split up into several, smaller batteries that extend over the course of the arms. Something about the way the arms move in Peter's drawings look a lot more... smooth, silky, like a cephalopod.
An octopus.
But you are amazed at Peter's capabilities, either way. "Using multiple different batteries, so the energy isn't drawn away from the neural interface in a great capacity?" You blink, a bit amused at Peter's eager expression. "It would work, I think, but only if Otto is willing for a slight decrease in power."
"Ah, but that's where you're wrong. We don't need to sacrifice power at all." Peter draws a set of gears, interlocking through the squiddy looking arm, and you clap your hands, clambering up out of your seat, finally enthused by his idea.
"Peter Parker, you genius!" You shake his arm excitedly, and he turns a bit pinker as he watches you, grinning. "Otto wanted the arm to be almost entirely synthetic material- but if it has rotating gears, the less it will jerk around. It'll be faster, smoother-"
"Thus requiring less power anyways, and less power will be redirected into his neural interface. And, hypothetically, no more angry Otto." Peter grins, and you smile up at him. "I mean, it'll still take some tinkering to figure out, but incremental improvements are still improvements, right?"
"Definitely. Plus we can always try to convince him about solar power again." You joke as Peter snickers.
Peter opens his mouth, about to say something to you, but he stares for a moment too long and hesitates, especially because in the nerdy excitement, he had gotten so close to you, and he was a liar if he said he had never checked out his cute co-worker. Any second now, you should be teasing as you usually do- but your eyes are wide and Peter gets the sense you've been swept up in this too.
He's never been so... close. He can make out individual eyelashes, tiny scars, imperceptible to normal people, but not to him.
And his phone buzzes with some kind of alert. He looks it over with bright, concerned eyes, while you take a moment to step back, much to Peter's mild irritation.
"Ah... must be MJ?" You ask, trying so very hard not to sound like a jealous girlfriend, just a curious colleague. You have nothing against MJ- you just feel that she and Peter are so meant for each other, and this is exactly why you've been trying to protect yourself.
Who are you kidding? You and Peter are both so busy- you'd never have time to be his doting, adoring girlfriend. You just have to remember him as a friend.
Already you feel the walls coming into place, your expression turning neutral, your heart becoming steely, when Peter looks at you again, surprised.
He can tell you're holding yourself back- and he doesn't like that. He wants you to come back to him, to be close with him again, and it drives him nuts that it has to be your choice, but he respects that.
"Not MJ. We broke up a while ago." Peter swallows, hoping he's saying the right things. "Uh... I don't think we're going to get back together. She's dating someone else now."
"Oh." You squeeze Peter's shoulder as comfortingly as you can. "Peter, I'm sorry. I would've been less of an ass if I'd known."
"No, don't be." Peter fixes a firm, kindhearted glance at you, taking your hands, the warmth of his own making you feel especially treasured. "You're great."
There's a teeny bit of hope working it's way into you, into your silly, girly heart despite all the steel around it, and Peter has a soft smile reserved just for you- you know that smile, you've seen it before when he comforts you when an experiment goes poorly, or when you've had a Eureka moment.
He rubs your hands. "Jeez, you're cold! I know women are usually freezing in the workplace- different body temperatures on average and all that- but I'm going to have to talk to Otto about making it warmer in here."
"Lest I die of hypothermia, right." You snort, and Peter snickers, but he still stays close, as if he's using this as an excuse. "Well, at least I have your hands."
Peter's phone buzzes again, another alert, which he apologetically takes a moment to read after letting go of you. Something about Fisk's thugs making their way through Grand Central Station- he shouldn't leave right now, but he can see your curiosity is piqued.
"Just a news alert. Nothing big." Peter lies, and you don't quite buy it, but you don't want to pry at this moment after he's complimented you and been so nice to warm up your hands.
Otto bursts through the entrance of the room, sighing.
"Will you two lovebirds stop canoodling with each other and test out the circuitry? You know, like I'm paying you to do so with very limited funds?" He barks, and then inhales. "Sorry. Just... try to stay on task. And I know you're young and all... but stop drawing on the walls!"
He leaves, grumbling about youth being too romantic and wishing they would understand sensibility.
You're about to refute whatever Otto said, so Peter doesn't feel uncomfortable, when he speaks first.
"I take it he isn't a romantic." Peter jokes as he grabs some paper towels, and you laugh, feeling that Peter's flirting was more genuine than you thought.
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merakiui · 6 months
Text
it's trey's birthday!!!!! >:) to celebrate, here are a few trey thoughts and concepts.
(cw: yandere, unhealthy behaviors/relationship, gaslighting, mention of non-con, sk!trey, mention of love potion/drugging, brief nsfw, implied somnophilia)
✧ trey using his um to make you think you're free and can go anywhere, when in reality all this time you've been confined to a single room and every "place" you've gone to is simply the result of his unique magic altering your senses. that bakery you visited with him? that didn't really happen. the library? not real. the park? nonexistent. it's just you and trey in this single room and you've yet to figure it out. :)
✧ being trey's friend since childhood and you've always had a crush on him. the two of you have been inseparable, but when he goes off to nrc and you're left in the queendom of roses to attend school there your feelings start to dampen...and very quickly at that. the reason? trey hasn't been around to feed you the love potion he mixed into the pastries. he's been doing it since the two of you were children. it started as an accident when he unintentionally knocked it into the practice batter and you ate it and... he just likes it when you're in love with him. is that so terrible of a thing to want? :< meanwhile, you've always thought your feelings for him were true. ;;;
✧ au in which trey and rook are roommates and you're desperately trying to find a place to stay. isn't it so nice and convenient that your two friends have an extra room open for you to take? :) don't worry about paying rent with money. you can pay with other things.
✧ researcher trey x captive mer darling. maybe you're scared or anxious around humans and he's ultimately the one who befriends you. of course he does so with his own intentions in mind...
✧ trey with a darling who has a fear of men and he helps you get more comfortable around him by showing you he's safe and would never hurt you. he's just so gentle and so trustworthy and so sweet; he's so good at minding your personal space and being so patient and helpful. unfortunately, he just wants you to be more comfortable so it'll be easier to slide into your heart. and maybe he gets impatient and non-cons you instead. :( all of that trust... shattered. but now he has you all to himself and can slowly twist your perception of him in the strangest ways. he gaslights you into thinking that other men would do the same thing, but it'd be much worse and so you can really only ever trust and rely on him. see? doesn't he treat you so softly? you don't have to be scared; he helps you, saves you, protects you. he's good and others are bad.
✧ i never talk about trey's starsending robes, but omg they're so !!!!!!! stargazer trey who is there to collect your wish and you wish for a boyfriend because you thought it'd be a silly and lighthearted wish to make. trey is going to grant that wish if it's the last thing he does. >:D
✧ vampire trey.
✧ trey helping you fix your gag reflex by fucking your mouth often!!!! <3 now when you brush your tongue you won't gag anymore. :)
✧ serial killer trey and his obsession with collecting full sets of teeth from his victims. your teeth are especially fascinating to him, and thus you shall be his next victim.
✧ tooth fairy trey LOL.
✧ dentist trey......... but he's the dentist from novocaine. the sheer gaslighting in this song omg. the "you're bleeding now cuz you never floss" line.......... dentist trey is my beloved. i hope others can see this vision.
✧ OMG WAIT. dentist trey and dr. riddle... the two horsemen of the medical malpractice apocalypse. ;;;;;;;;;;; maybe they're roommates and you see the both of them for annual check-ups, so it's over for you when you wake shackled in their flat. T_T they know your medical history so well; you're in good hands.
✧ trey who takes care of you when you're sick, only to realize he quite likes it when you're so weak and feeble. he intentionally keeps you sick so you'll rely on him and if you think something's amiss he gaslights all of your worries away, minimizing them with a simple, "it must be a rough flu season..." or "don't push yourself so hard; you'll only get sicker." >:( no!!!! trey, you're the one making darling sicker!!!!!! in the same vein that trey is your greatest pathogen, he is also your greatest panacea. for only he gets to decide when you can heal and get better. :)
✧ you often party a lot with cater, so trey's seen you when you're intoxicated far too many times. he tries to be upstanding and honest on the surface, if only to look normal and reliable. but how can he resist when you're right there on his bed, passed out like a corpse?
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Carpe Noctem 20
Warnings: dark elements, noncon, age gap, gaslighting, manipulation, violence, blood, other dark elements. Proceed with caution. (short!reader)
Note: Please let me know what you think as it helps me a lot with ideas and I love interacting with you all.
Part of The Club AU
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You don’t know where to go. You know you can’t go back to Lloyd’s. Not yet. You don’t want to talk about what happened. Maybe he won’t even ask or care but it would be obvious if you got back so soon.
So you drive around, listless, until you find a place to park and hide behind your steering wheel. You stay there for a while, just across the street from a hardware store. You check your empty thermos and sigh. Coffee. More coffee and you can think.
You get out and cross the street. You head up down the next block to the cafe nestled between a pawn shop and pharmacy. You get a medium roast and add a healthy dollop of cream. You sit down at a table and try to piece together your life.
You’ve lost Johnny, your apartment, and pretty much your job. What else do you have left? What are you going to tell Lloyd? He’ll be expecting some sort of rent and you’ll be lucky to get that much on your next pay.
You glance over at the counter as a puff of steam hisses from one of the machines. You bite down on the inside of your lip and leave your cup at the table. It’s not really a downgrade, but you’ll miss the kids.
“Hey, excuse me, sorry,” you speak over the lower part of the counter where you can see the baristas at work, “I was wondering if you were accepting applications.”
“Oh, uh, yeah, there’s some part-time spots open,” the man calls back, “just Google us and it will come right up.”
“Uh, duh, I should’ve thought of that,” you laugh at yourself awkwardly, “anyways, thanks.”
“Boss is here, I can see if he’s free… he does all the interviewing.”
“I, um, I’d hate to be a bother–”
“Honestly, you wouldn’t,” he brings a mocha to the counter and signals to you as he calls out a name, handing over the drink to another customer. He turns back to you, his name tag reads Peter. “We need all the help we can get.”
“Right, er, okay, I guess… I guess if he’s free.”
“Sick, I’ll go run and get him,” he spins and waves at his coworker, “Ned, I’ll be right back.”
The other employee only rolls his eyes as he takes an order at the till. You hover there, waiting, wringing your hands nervously. Peter clamours back, out of breath, cheeks rosy.
“He’s coming,” he grins broadly, “I’m Peter.”
“I know,” you nod to his name tag.
“Oh, yeah,” he looks down goofily, “you?”
You give your name and shift your weight on your feet. He grabs another receipt and an empty cup.
“You can sit down, he’ll find you.”
“Okay, thanks again,” you show your teeth sheepishly then drag your feet back to your table.
You lower yourself into the seat and stare into the cup. It’ll be something until you can get better. Or go back to the daycare. You hate to think you won’t ever see the kids again.
“Uh, hey,” a man approaches, thumbs hooked in his jean pockets, “you the one?”
You look up, slightly startled as your worries split down the seams. You open and close your mouth as you peer up at his bright blue eyes. He seems familiar.
“Y-yeah, looking for a job,” you brace the table and go to stand. He stops you as he raises his palm and sits across from you. He turns his hand and offers it to you, “Cole.”
You once more say your name as you shake his hand. He clings a little bit longer than you expect but lets you go and rests his forearm across the table. He smiles and you stare back, waiting for him to say something.
“So…” his eyes widen as he remembers why he’s there, “you make coffee before?”
“Well, sort of. I can use a french press and I used to have a nespresso…” you let your voice trails off; before Johnny broke it. “But I can learn and I have loads of customer service experience.”
“I can tell,” he taps his fingers on the table, “you have a kind face. Does that sound weird?”
“Um, no, thanks, I think,” you keep your smile in place. He’s a bit strange but not unpleasant.
“I just bought this place, you know? Lots of changes so I wanna revamp it. Get some new faces in.”
“That’s exciting. It’s very… quaint,” you glance around.
“Ah, don’t worry, I know it needs work. Actually, I think… I don’t wanna offend you but we could use a good eye around here. A woman’s touch. You think maybe you’d have some ideas for the redesign?”
“Well, I… I only worked in a daycare, so I don’t…”
“I like that,” he snaps his fingers and points at you, “alright, well, Peter can show you how to use the espresso machine and I’ll come get you to look at swatches when you’re not too busy.”
He stands, surprising you as you can only gape up at him.
“Is that it?”
“That’s it,” he looks at his watch, “gotta call ma. It’s about that time.”
He strides away, leaving you absolutely upended. That was somehow the most and least stressful interview you’ve ever had. You shake your head and hug your coffee with your hands.
“When you’re done that,” Peter calls over, “I’ll teach you how to grind beans.”
“Oh, great,” you nod and look out the window, hiding your uncertainty. It’s not forever, just for a while. Just like Lloyd. You’ll be back on your feet soon.
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grxmreaperx · 6 months
Note
I've been thinking about Peter Strahm's s/o being desperate for him, palming at his pants and telling him how much they love and need him. Maybe they suck him off or ride him like there's no tomorrow? x3
this request has been living rent free in my head for the last few days!! the Strahm babes are getting some content!!
Show Me How Much You Missed Me
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Pairing: Peter Strahm x reader
Word count: 1.7k
Warnings: 18+!!! Smut!! MDNI. Dirty talk, daddy kink, oral (m! receiving), p in v penetration, creampie, praise kink
Summary: On your day off, all you can do is think about your boyfriend, Peter. When he gets home, you really try and pay attention when he’s telling you about his day, but you have something much different on your mind.
You perked up as soon as you heard the key in the lock. He was home.
You rushed over to Peter as soon as he opened the front door, wrapping your arms around his neck. He chuckled into your hair as he wrapped an arm around your waist.
“Hi, my angel.” Your heart skipped a beat at the nickname.
You had missed him so much. You had the day off from work and sat around watching your favorite TV show and doing some chores around your shared apartment. You had tried to convince Peter to not go into work this morning, to stay in bed with you and take a day off, he deserved it after all. But you knew his job didn’t work that way.
He held you close, shutting the door with his free hand, before guiding you over to the couch. He sat you both down, letting out a groan as he took his shoes off and undid his tie. You sat beside him, one leg resting across his own and your head lying on his shoulder. He wrapped an arm around you as he got comfortable, placing a kiss on your forehead.
You excitedly asked him about his day, wanted to hear all about his work.
He sighed. “Boring. Perez and I spent all day sifting through paperwork, trying to find any pattern in the case we’ve been working on. My eyes are fuckin’ killing me.”
You listened intently as he continued, telling you all about how Erikson was on their asses all day, they hardly even had time for coffee breaks.
“You will be happy about this, though,” he said, raising an eyebrow at you.
“And what is that?”
“Perez really likes your friend that you set her up with. Spent all day talking about her. Said they’re going to dinner tomorrow night.”
You sat up excitedly, a smile glued to your face. “See! I told you!”
He laughed. “Yeah, yeah. I didn’t think red heads were her type, but I guess you were right.”
You lightly slapped his shoulder before settling back in, a proud smile still on your face. You listened as he went on, complaining about the mountains of paperwork waiting for him tomorrow.
You tried to pay attention, you really did, but you found yourself a bit distracted. You couldn’t help but notice the way his hair stood up slightly, the neat style he had when he left this morning undone by his hand running through it. You couldn’t help but notice his shirt sleeves rolled up above his elbows, showing off the veins in his forearms. You couldn’t help but notice the top buttons undone, revealing a little bit of his chest.
“You okay, angel?” he asked, drawing you out of your thoughts.
“Hm? Oh, yeah, I’m okay.”
“You look a little distracted. Something on your mind?” You smirked at the look on his face, completely oblivious to why you were really distracted. His eyebrows furrowed, taking in every part of your expression, making sure you were really okay.
“I mean, maybe I’m a little distracted,” you said softly, resting a hand on his thigh.
“What’s on your mind, baby?” he asked, starting to get an idea when your hand began to move higher.
“Just missed you a lot today,” you whined, slowly beginning to palm him through his pants.
He sucked in a breath through his teeth, running a hand through your hair. “Is that right, baby?”
You nodded against his chest, placing soft kisses along his collar. “Hate when you have to go to work. Want you to stay here with me all day.”
“I know, love,” he said, leaning his back against the couch, savoring your touch and the feeling of your lips grazing his throat. “Wish I could just stay here with you, too. Tell me what you want baby.”
You whined, feeling your face heat up. You began to palm him harder, hoping that would be enough to get what you want.
He gently grabbed your chin, forcing you to meet his gaze. “Be good and use your words, angel.”
“Want you,” you said softly.
“C’mon, sweetheart, you can do better than that. Use that pretty voice and tell me what you want.”
“Wanna suck you off,” you said, forcing yourself to hold his gaze.
He grinned, running his thumb over your lip. “Then what are you waiting for, baby?”
You quickly sunk to the floor in front of him as he worked on his belt, pulling his pants down just enough to free himself. He pushed your hair from your face as you placed your tongue flat against him, licking a long stripe up his dick.
He closed his eyes for a moment as he let out a deep groan. He watched as you took him down your throat, hand wrapping around the base of his cock.
“God, you look so good like this, angel,” he groaned, gently guiding your head as you gagged on him. “Should’ve stayed home with you today.”
You felt your eyes water slightly as he hit the back of your throat, working what you couldn’t fit with your hand. You moaned around his dick, looking up at him through wet eyelashes. He savored the feeling of your mouth around him, watching your spit coat his cock, your wide eyes staring up at him.
“So good for me, sweetheart. Is this what you’ve been thinking about all day while I’ve been gone?”
“Maybe,” you said with a smile, pulling off him for a moment to catch your breath. You wiped the drool from your bottom lip, a strand of it still connecting you to his dick. You placed small kisses along his stomach as he rubbed your head, your hand still stroking him.
“Get up here, baby. Show me how much you missed me.”
You quickly climbed back on the couch, pulling off your sweats and underwear before straddling his lap. He grabbed his dick, lining it up at your entrance, his other hand wrapped around your waist. You began to sink down onto him when he gripped you tighter, halting your movements.
“I wanna hear you tell me what you want first, baby. Tell me what you’ve been thinking about all day. I love hearing your pretty voice tell me what you want.”
You whined, leaning forward to bury your face in the crook of his neck, trying to grind your hips. “Want you inside me…”
“What was that baby? I couldn’t quite hear you.”
You pulled away, sitting back up on his lap and taking in the smug smile on his face.
“Wanna ride you,” you sighed, the ache between your legs growing unbearable. “Want you inside me.”
“That’s much better, angel,” he said, slowly sinking you down onto his cock. “Show me how much you want it, sweetheart.”
Your mouth fell open as he filled you, stretching you out perfectly. You gripped his shoulders tightly, keeping yourself steady. His hands ran over your body, stopping to squeeze your thighs as you began to bounce. He let out a small moan as you started to move, his eyes locked on where your bodies connected.
You ran your hands under his shirt, needing to feel him, touch him. “Missed you so much, daddy. Thought about you all day.”
He sucked in a breath at the name, gripping your hips. “Fuck, baby, I missed you too. I love when you get so needy for me. So good for me.”
You began to pick up the pace, his praise going straight between your legs. You needed more. More of him, more of the way he made you feel. The sounds of your moans filled the room as he pulled you against him, kissing his way up your neck. You began to grind your hips each time you sunk back down, desperate for more.
“Need some help, angel?” he asked, a smile on his face as he took in the expression on yours.
You nodded frantically, needing to feel him thrust into you. He wrapped an arm around your waist, repositioning you so were on your back, legs spread wide for him. He placed a hand on each of your thighs, pressing them back until your knees were against your chest.
“So good for me, baby,” he groaned as he began to pump into you. “Look so fuckin’ pretty like this.”
You threw your head back, hands gripping the cushions, crying out at how deep he was. He leaned down, caging you between his arms, and caught your lips in a searing kiss. Your arms wrapped around his shoulders, nails scratching at his back as he groaned into your mouth.
You whined against his lips as you felt the pressure building in your stomach. Your legs began to shake, and he pulled away, just enough to see your face.
“You gonna cum for me, angel? Be good and cum around daddy’s dick, baby.”
He took your face in one of his hands, gripping it just tight enough to force you to look at him as the tension snapped and you reached your high. He smiled, praising you through your orgasm as you shook underneath him.
You felt his thrusts falter a bit and knew he wasn’t far behind you.
“You want me to cum inside you sweetheart?” he asked. You nodded, a moan escaping your throat at the thought. “Yeah, want me to fill you up baby?”
You cried out, begging for him to fill you. His hips pressed against yours as he finished, letting out a deep groan as he reached his high.
He leaned down, resting his forehead against your as you both caught your breath. After a moment, he pulled out of you, sitting back up on the couch and pulling you gently up onto his lap. He pushed your hair out of your face, planting a soft kiss on your lips.
He smiled at you, holding you close to him. “God, I really should’ve stayed home you today, hm?”
tag list: @bee-who-isnt-french, @enigmatic-blues, @kujofam, @aliengutzstuff, @mysunfishpeedinmyroom, @schrodingersjigsaw, @librababe99
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teruel-a-witch · 1 year
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steve is a ride-or-die husband in married for real
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doesn't even ask why danny wants to kill someone, just who, and immediately assumes they will be doing it together, just like everything else.
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all jokes aside about how deeply married they are, genuinely it's astounding how truly intertwined their lives are. 'your problems become my problems'. just like in a real marriage there's a certain entitlement towards each other's possessions, 'what's mine is yours and viceversa'.
steve drives danny's car and even danny slips and calls it 'our car'
danny calls steve's living room 'our living room'
'why is he mad at us?' 'must be your fault' aka they share enemies and grudges
steve helps himself to danny's wallet (basically pooled finances) but also drops exorbitant amounts of money on gifts to danny and grace
danny wanders into steve's house without knocking and helps himself to steve's fridge whenever he feels like it
not to mention how possessive he is over steve's kitchen and is indignant when he sees another man using what's his (because when he lived in a shitty apartment he basically used it whenever to learn to cook properly as by the end of s1 he's clearly cooked steve breakfast enough times that steve knows he hates his eggs)
'what are WE thinking, buddy'
co-parenting danny's kids together (steve even calls grace 'my girl' and worries about her being sent to a school that's gonna be a den of sin)
'if a guy was taking pictures like that of my daughter I'd kill him' 'me too'
when danny gets called away for work steve finishes charlie's bedroom by himself and then tells charlie danny did it just like a stay-at-home parent covering up for the busy parent
danny delegates activities he doesn't want to do (jogging, training, surfing) but steve would love to do to him so they are both contributing in raising grace. (meanwhile he hates that stan is paying for her tennis lessons, intruding on something danny willingly lets steve in on)
steve sees danny's retirement as their business, 'our retirement'
they go 50/50 on a restaurant which is danny's dream and steve is nothing if not a supportive husband
all the times danny stays at the house for weeks rent free (and sleeps in steve's bed while house-sitting and blames it on the dog) and moves in twice, second time permanently
dreams of shared future together, 'this is how I always thought it was gonna end, two guys sitting on the beach, watching sunsets'
they really are married in all but the legal sense. it's a mutually beneficial partnership where they are equals not in the sense that they literally contribute the same amount but they contribute what they can in accordance to their ability and compromise and fit together like a jigsaw puzzle. they even have an almost innate telepathy only characteristic of people that have been married for decades.
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nyrasbloodyclover · 11 months
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hypnotic (kai anderson x reader)
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cw: breeding kink, eating disorder (it's really really bad), mommy issues, mentions of suicide, parental abuse, cults, kai is his own warning really, murder, overstimulation
a/n: if you're not into this pleaseeeee leaveeeeee i don't want tumblr to delete my blog again. also you can read this fic on ao3 if you'd like, link is in my pinned post. and if, by any chance, you relate to this i am so sorry.
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What I wanted right now, was to get out of my house, go anywhere, just so I could stop listening to constant fighting and screaming from my parents. I couldn't bear it anymore. I had one year until college but it seemed impossible to survive that long. 
"Oh, look who locked herself in her room!" My mother bursted in and a pit started forming in my stomach. I didn't move. "When are you going to start being useful? You're in here all the time, you could start paying rent." 
Now, what was I supposed to say to that? If I told her that the reason I spent all my time in my room was because they wouldn't stop screaming at each other and I would just be their punching bag, she wouldn't listen and the situation would only get worse.
"Or maybe it's time for you to find a job. Now you're just living like a parasite." I stared. My mother was a very complex character. I think she would be capable of pulling Gone Girl on us. She has the mentality. Just saying.
My father on the other hand, he's weak. Or she made him weak. I don't remember the last time he stood up for himself. He's tired, I can see that clearly. I just wish they would get a divorce. It's so draining to wake up everyday and live in fear that your every move is going to be a mistake, something to criticize. 
I don't remember the last time I felt truly at peace, but I could afford myself distractions. That's how I ended up scrolling through Tumblr 12 hours per day and forgetting to eat because the skinny girls I came across were just so pretty. Food was my enemy. We couldn't stand each other. And the guilt simply because of eating was the worst feeling ever.
Empty is pretty. And I wanted to look pretty, so I starved. It was my sport. It still is. The joy of seeing my hipbones and ribs after some time was indescribable. I loved to lay awake at night and touch my bones, feel them as I tried to fall asleep. Of course, there were many times when I just couldn't take it anymore and I binged. I would regret it immediately and restrict even more.
"Alright. I'll find a job." I stared at her with empty eyes. I was dizzy, almost like I got drunk. She exited the room and slammed the doors behing her. I think I'm never going to fully understand her.
I stared at my ceiling, having no energy to move, even though I had unfinished assignments hanging above my head, screaming at me to do them, but I just wanted to sleep. School can wait. I think my red lipstick was smudged, but I had no energy to take it off. My hair was a mess, too. I tried to straighten it but my natural waves were too stubborn. I fell asleep.
A week passed. My life stayed the same except for my new job at the restaurant—The Butchery On Main.
The two sweet women who own it were kind enough to let me work even though they don't employ people under eighteen. I worked mostly after my school, until the closing. I didn't mind since I got to leave the house and get a break from my parents. 
People were nice, I took their orders, served their food. The restuarant was mostly empty during my shifts, but nonetheless it was almost hard, working with food. All those calories around me made me want to puke. And I wasn't much of a puker. I had the urge to binge. It was disgusting. But I wasn't going to throw all my work out of the window just like that. 
I had my diet coke and if I got hungry Ivy said that I could eat whatever I wanted, and I wanted cucumber. With pepper. They had those.
Today, I had much free time so I was just sitting at one of the tables and doing my homework while scrolling through Tumblr and eating freshly peeled cucumber with some seasoning on top. I was thriving. I was almost happy. It seemed impossible.
The door opened. A man walked in. He was dressed in black from head to toe and what stood out the most was his blue hair with grown out roots. He walked like he owned the building and everyone in it. I immediately stood up, while he was pulling out his chair, fixing my uniform. I let him read through the menu for a couple of seconds and then decided to approach.
"What would you like to order?" I smiled. I was nice. I am always nice. Why hasn't he looked at me yet? Why is he ignoring my presence? His head was bowed down until he raised it and I was met with black pools that stared at me, or rather through me. I felt dizzy and it wasn't the diet.
"Surprise me," he cocked his head, "I would love to see what you liberals like to eat the most. Maybe it'll make me change my political views."
"Al..right," I dragged on, "Is that all?"
"Yes," he replied.
"Everything will be done in a minute." I wanted to get away from him, as soon as possible. He was probably some Trump obsessed republican who's most likely to tell me to make him a sandwich. Which I am practically doing right now. But I couldn't deny it - He had a beautiful face. I wouldn't consider him that attractive if it weren't for his dead, piercing eyes that silently commanded you to obey every one of his rules. 
The food was ready. I had a feeling I would fall on my face next time I locked my eyes with his, which wasn't good. I didn't even know his name! Rachel, one of the cooks, handed me the best steak they had, house's special, "Who is it for?"
I didn't dare look at him. "The one with the blue hair. Just please don't stare. He's creeping me out."
Her eyes went wide, "That's Kai Anderson."
I looked at her blandly. The name didn't mean anything to me.
"You seriously need to watch more television."
"I'm fine, thanks. And if he's some menatlly deranged politician, then I'm not really missing out."
All the politics drained me, and don't get me wrong, I loved to be informed, but when I had to argue with someone about basic human rights, I'd rather not know anything.
I walked over to his table, and put the food on it. "I hope you're not vegan. Either way, enjoy your food." I kept my eyes everywhere, just not on him. He was so unsettling. I had to get away.
"I certainly will," he said and I walked away without a second glance. Jesus Christ, his mere presence was intense.
My shift ended in half an hour and that's when the restaurant was supposed to close. Ivy left early because of some family emergency, so she asked me to close and lock everything for her. I changed into my regular clothes—denim skirt and a white button down with my favorite black sweater, docs and a pair of knee socks. I untangled my hair and tried to brush it out with my fingers.
The tables were empty. Well, mostly. So-called Kai Anderson was still here, not even eating, just looking at some papers and flipping them over, for a while now.
I needed some extra balls to approach him and ask him to leave. Why did I accept to be the last one here? I could've been home by now, sleeping or watching a sitcom, but instead I'm stuck in this building with the strangest and the scariest man I've ever met. But then again, If I were home, my mother would be screaming at me. So I guess it's a win? Also I had to thank Kai for occupying my mind and not letting me think about food. I seriously needed to go to bed before I ended up eating something. Or worse- binging. I think I had less than 200 calories today which is a sign that I am slowly approaching danger zone. It isn't a diet anymore. I can't eat normally. I thought I could go back, but I guess my body won't let me. Or was it my mind?
"Miss?" Someone waved before my eyes.
"Yes? Sorry." Kai was standing beside the table that I occupied. 
"Are you closing soon?"
Should I lie? But then again, he isn't stupid. "Yes. Do you want to pay?"
"Oh no. I already did. I just wondered what occupied your mind that much." He had no idea.
"Nothing much. Just tired I guess. Can't seem to balance school and work."
"Ah. You see," he sat across me, "I don't believe you."
"Okay? I didn't try to be persuasive."
He smirked. Dear God, why was he so creepy but so hot at the same time?
"I still want to know what made you zone out for that long." Has he been staring at me the whole time?
"That's creepy. I don't even know you."
"What's that got to do with anything? I just asked you to tell me what's been botherung you. You looked fucking stressed."
"It really doesn't matter." I just wanted him to leave. 
"Wait. Here, I'll give you..." he reached into his  back pocket, "Fifty bucks if you tell me."
My lips curved. Come on, you can't blame me. Extra cash at my age isn't something you just don't accept.
"Ah! I knew it," he smiled, "Come on, doll, speak."
"It isn't anything interesting. My mom is just being a bitch, nothing unusual." I gave him the least I could and snatched the cash from his hand.
"She isn't letting you sleep over at your boyfriend's or something?" He laughed like I had the dumbest reason for not liking my mother.
"Not really. She just...Wants too much, I guess? And I'm not able to give her that." It felt weird saying that out loud. I think I never said it.
He stared at me for a second.
"I want to show you a trick." He put his right hand on the table. "Don't worry. It's something me and my older brother always used to do when we were little."
He reached with his pinky finger over to my hand. We locked fingers like we were making a pinky promise. 
"This is weird. And please hurry. My shift ends in fifteen minutes." 
"We have enough time. Okay, listen. Pinky power. Once the skin contact is made, no lies can be told and whatever we say, stays between us," he narrowed his black eyes, "Trust me, if you lie, I will know. Ready?"
When did I agree to this? Well, fuck it, I'll do it anyway.
"Do you love your family?" He asked, his expression serious.
"Yes." His mouth twitched.
"Do you like your family?"
"Absolutely not." I shook my head.
"Why is that?" 
How do I explain this to him without sounding like a total maniac? "My father is weak, he doesn't know how to stand up for himself. And my mother screams at me for merely existing. Her favorite hobby is emotionally draining me, then pulling my hair or slapping me because she feels like it. She regrets having me. I think she wants me to kill myself. It would be easier to have a dead daughter." My mind went blank. I felt nothing in that moment. Whatever he asked, I was going to tell him.
"Did you ever try to kill yourself?," he asked with a flat voice.
I thought for a second. Should I tell him the whole truth? He said he's going to know if I lie, but that doesn't mean...
"Don't think too much." His eyes went dark while I was literally choking under pressure of his gaze.
"No. I was never suicidal. I like living. But I..." words were stuck in my throat, "I...Sometimes, she would starve me. Saying I didn't deserve it. I had no money to buy something to eat. So I made a game out of it. I developed a disorder. It was the only thing I had some control over. I started it out of spite, but now it's real. It's worse than ever. But I don't want to stop."
His expression never changed. Not once. "Do you hate your mother for that?"
"You have no idea."
"I think I do have some idea about hating one of your parents. So, from experience, I need to ask you one more question."
I nodded. "Have you ever dreamt about killing her?"
I wanted to pull back from him, but his hand wouldn't let me. He pulled me even closer. "We can't break the contact," he gritted through his teeth.
"I know, I know, I'm sorry," I exhaled, "Yes. And no."
"Elaborate." 
The restuarant was silent. I couldn't even hear the sound of cars outside. Lights were practically out. 
"I...I wanted her dead. But I don't think I would be able to do it. I had a," I inhaled, "A fantasy about someone killing her while I watched. It's so fucked up, but I just couldn't help it. It brought me relief that she was gone and someone cared enough to get rid of her for me." 
I was scared to look at him. He was going to call the mental ward and lock me there. I was fucked. Why did I tell him all of that? 
I looked up.
He was smiling. It wasn't a sympathetic smile, or a sad smile, or anything similar to that. He was grinning like a maniac. He released my hand and I realized my eyes were filled with tears. I blinked them away. 
He shook his head with closed eyes, "You're perfect. Perfect."
My voice was low, weak. "What? How could you think that after what I just told you?"
"Don't ask too many questions. I have a solution for you because I know you're destined for greater things. Tell me, do you wish to never be under your mother's thumb again?"
"I mean, yes? That's going to be when I turn eighteen, so I have to be patient."
He laughed. "Oh, no, baby, no. She's never going to let you go. She'll suffocate you until there is nothing left but a shell. No matter the age or what the law says, you'll always be controlled. While she's alive, at least."
"What are you saying?"
"Do you want my help? Do you wish to be finally free?"
This was so fucked up. I never met this man in my life. Why was he offering me help?
"What's in it for you?"
He cocked his head, "I get to keep you by my side."
My mouth was dry. I was scared, but...excited. Thrill rushed down my body as this psychopath was staring at me, offering me a sick escape. I was supposed to say no. I was supposed to save my soul.
"Yes."
"Yes, what?"
"I want your help."
He looked so happy, it made me happy.
"Good. Then, we're leaving now." I was hypnotized by him. I just nodded, not asking where or why, my mother taught me I shouldn't get in the cars with strangers, especially men, but my mother was also the reason for many of my problems. I'll do something that'll piss her off.
I got into Kai's car and shut the door. I was okay with the fact that he might end up killing me.
He said nothing for the most of the ride, but I noticed him glancing over at my skirt that rose up to my thighs. I didn't bother pulling it down. I mean, I wore mini skirts for a reason, right?
I pretended not to notice as I looked at my reflection in the closed window. Hollow cheeks, red lipstick, pale face. I was obsessed. I always wanted to look like a corpse with make up. My face was perfect, lipstick untouched, mascara a little smudged, dark circles under my eyes from sleepless nights. 
"You know you could eat a burger." I looked at him. I almost wanted to hug him. His words made me feel proud, like I achieved something big. And I guess I did.
"Really? Do you know that you're the first person ever to tell me that?" I felt weird happiness in my chest. 
"Well, yeah. Why do you look so surprised? I didn't mean it as a compliment. You have a problem. I'm not even sure it's supposed to be a compliment." He frowned, not taking his eyes off the road.
"It doesn't matter if it's supposed to be a compliment or not. Thank you for saying it." I didn't give two fucks if he thought I was some anorexic lunatic that needed years of therapy. I was happy. And he wasn't my parent or my guardian to tell me what to do.
"Just think about it. What's the point of being so skinny? It's not even attractive."
"The point is in being clean. I don't want to see a pound of fat on my body. It's disgusting. And I am to do with my body as I please. I don't give a fuck if someone likes to eat like a fucking pig because It's not my body, and certainly not my problem." I was so angry. Who the fuck he thought he was?
"Just saying. You look sick. And I mean really, really sick."
"I am aware. Like I'm also aware that I'm fucked in the head. And that's the reason for all of this," I gestured over my figure. 
I could feel his anger. He didn't like that I disagreed with him and stood up for myself, even if I was wrong.
"We're here." He suddenly said, getting out of the car. I followed him into the house I guessed was his. The whole neighborhood was silent. Lights were off everywhere. 
We got into his house and I didn't even got to see it clearly because he practically dragged me into his basement and started changing. He put on a black leather coat while looking for something. His phone? He called someone.
"I'm expecting you'll be here in five? Well don't try to make up excuses. This is a perfect opportunity. I don't care— No, drag yourself and your pathetic wife here." He called two more people and I just stood in the middle of the room staring at him. 
"What's your adress?" Was he really doing that now? "You know what, never mind. I found it." I wasn't going to ask him how. He looked like the person who instead of Instagram browsed dark web. 
"Okay, let's go. They're here." I had to ask him because he said nothing about it. I had to be sure.
"Why are we going to my house?"
Beat. A moment. "To kill your mother, of course."
There were other people with us, but I couldn't see their faces because of the creepy clown masks. Kai had one too. I felt like I was drugged. I didn't know what happened to me. I suppose I had enough. I know Kai is not the answer for my problems, at least not all of them. He's going to get rid of her and then what? No. Stop thinking. 
I listened to my brain this time. It was late. My parents were probably asleep. Probably in separate beds. It's going to be easier for Kai and the others to do the job. They kept their mouths shut and I didn't blame them. I still wasn't sure if I was part of this sick cult or whatever it was. I read enough about them to recognize a cult leader when I see one. 
The car suddenly stopped. We were in front of my house.
"This played out so good, little lamb. I knew you were perfect." Kai's voice was muffled under that mask and his words made my heart flutter. He was so sick. "Don't just stand there, baby. Be a good host. Invite us in. Come on," he gestured with one gloved hand towards my house. I felt everyone's eyes on me as I turned my back and started walking towards the door. What did he mean by this playing out good? Did he plan this before? It certainly did not matter.
We got in, doors creaking, but not enough to wake anyone up. My father was downstairs, in the guestroom, but my Satanic mother was in their bedroom. I went first, up the stairs, one by one, they followed me, Kai first, then the rest of them. 
I showed them the doors. 
Kai got in and they followed him. I shut the door behind me. I felt like I was seeing things through someone else's eyes. I didn't feel guilt and I wasn't regretting my decision. I remember everything through a coat of blur. Knives, a lot of them. They killed her in her sleep. Stabbed her too many times, I lost count. Sheets were soaked with red and the room started smelling like iron too. Kai used her blood to draw some sign on the wall that was facing the bed. It looked like a smiley face, but I wasn't sure. The job was done. I was free. I was free of any charges, since I wasn't home when it happened. I was going to sleep in my bed and wake up in the morning, shocked, petrified, screaming for help, calling the police, my father is going to be terrified too, but relieved. He would never admit it thought. 
We were in the car again. Then in front of Kai's house. "Leave. I want some time alone with our newest member."
"Kai, no. You can't drag her into this. She's just a child—" A feminine voice scorned him under her mask.
"Don't tell me what to do, Winter. Now leave," he raised his voice and I flinched. "We have much to talk about." He took off his mask and smiled knowingly at me. I wasn't scared of him anymore, though I knew I should be. He killed my mother for Christ's sake! 
We went into his basement again. The lights were already on and I watched him as he took off his mask and black coat. His shirt was soaked with my mother's blood. 
"What did you want to talk about?" I cocked my head.
"You were so good. I knew you could do it. Next time, maybe you'll even be the one holding the knife. You didn't even flinch!" He paced through the room and laughed, like he was talking to himself.
"You didn't do this for me, did you?"
He stopped, then looked at me, "I already told you. This played out perfectly. And I've been watching for quite some time now," his eyes darkened "When I found out that the woman who's been talking shit about me over her social media had a daughter, I had to see if she was as bitchy as her mother." Oh, so he did this to save his reputation. Of course.
"And," I swallowed, "Is she?"
He didn't answer me. Instead he marched to the other side of the room and pushed me against the wall, slamming his lips on mine. I was out of breath, not being able to process everything. Oh my god, he was kissing me! This insane, sick in the head, narcissistic, 30-something, psychopath was kissing me and I opened my mouth to him like the whore I was. I wanted him to touch me. No, I needed his blood stained hands on me right now. 
I pulled one of his hands and put it on my chest as his tongue continued to explore my mouth. He took off my sweater and shirt. I was left in a black bra and skirt.
"Aren't you scared of being arrested for fucking a minor?"
"I commited far more monstrous crimes than fucking a seventeen year old and you know it, " he breathed into my mouth. Red lipstick was smudged over his lips. His hand that was on my chest slipped under my skirt and found my panties. 
"You know it," his fingers entered me with ease, "And yet, you're still so fucking wet for me." My mouth fell open as he buried his fingers deeper if that was even possible. I wasn't a virgin, but then again, I've never been with a man. I took my own virginity so that I didn't have to bother. 
"Kai—" I breathed. I needed more.
He sat on one of the chairs beside the circular table and pulled me onto his lap, his thigh between my legs. My clit was aching for some king of friction so I started rubbing myself against the rough fabric of his jeans. 
"Aren't you desperate?" He pushed me on the floor, between his legs, he pulled out his belt and unzipped his pants. His intentions were clear and I was happy to oblige, but I had to touch myself or I'd go insane. I started stroking his already hard dick and rubbing my clit at the same time. 
He noticed. And he wasn't happy about it. "I thought you were going to be patient. But I guess not." He took his belt and with one move he tied my hands behind my back while I was still kneeling in front of him.
"Please, I just need to—"
"Yes, yes, I know, but you have to deserve it. Am I right?"
I nodded hesitantly and he scooped up my hair in his fist and used it to pull my head down. I took him into my mouth as the wetness and ache grew between my legs. 
Kai continued to pull my head down until his tip hit the back of my throat and I gagged. He chuckled.
My eyes teared up as I sucked his dick like my life depended on it.
He grunted and raised his hips, so I knew he was close. And I knew he was going to either come in my mouth or...
He pulled out and finished on my tits, painting my chest with his cum. 
"You were so good," he said with his head tilted back and eyes closed. He let my hair fall down my back and over my face. Kai dressed and got up, then pulled me with him, still tied.
He slammed me on the desk and I was able to just lay there and let him do whatever he wanted to me. Not that I minded.
"I feel like I'm going to break you," he said as he traced my very visible ribs with the tips of his fingers. "Break every bone in your body." 
I could feel my stomach sinking in and his words made me even a bigger mess than I already was. "Do it, please, please," I cried out as my hips rose towards him. 
"Since you asked so nicely...And the skirt stays on. Do you know how much willpower it took me not to bury my hand under your skirt and make you beg for more while we were driving?" He pulled my skirt up and didn't even bother to take off the panties, he just ripped them. He towered over me as I layed on his table, feeling the cool air on my swollen clit. 
Kai's fingers went over my aching pussy and my back arched towards his touch. He did nothing for a split second and then came the first slap. I yelped as the burning spread between my legs, but I didn't tell him to stop. He slapped me even harder and I cried out, most ungodly sounds coming from my mouth.
"Don't worry, you can scream as loud as you'd like."
He slapped my dripping cunt once more and after that I was sure I was going to feel his hands on me days after. He didn't wait for me to recover from his brutality, instead he buried two fingers inside me and started scissoring, wanting to spread me even wider. I threw my head back as he added one more. He buried them knuckle deep inside me and began curling them.
"I feel like you're a big girl. You can take one more." He didn't wait for my agreement. His four fingers were inside, making my pussy burn with pleasure. I wasn't able to form words. He spat on me and started massaging my clit while almost his whole hand was thrusting in and out of me. I felt pressure deep in my lower stomach and started panting and moaning for him to continue, but he did exactly the opposite. 
My cunt was left empty without his fingers and I could almost cry. I just needed a bit more.
"Don't look so upset. I'm not finished with you." 
Kai untied me and took his belt. He spread my legs as wide as he could and started spanking my pussy with it. I screamed more in pain than surprise, "Kai, no, stop, please stop-"
The pain was unbearable, but it was just enough  for my clit to start pulsing more and that pressure in my belly to grow. I screamed in pain as he continued to hit me with no mercy. I could feel my walls clenching and my back arched as I came undone. Orgasm hit me and I came down from my high, but Kai didn't stop. 
He started rubbing my abused cunt, overstimulating it. He was deaf to my begging and crying. It was too much. There was no pleasure anymore, just pure pain, but he continued to massage it and after a couple of minutes I was shaking with another orgasm. I knew I was too sensitive, but when I tried to close my legs, he stopped me. Then I noticed his rock hard dick under his jeans and my heart dropped. I was going to pass out. He was going to use me, not caring for my pleasure anymore.
"Just hold still a little more, doll." He pulled his dick out and slammed himself inside me, making my eyes roll to the back of my head. Everything hurt, but he didn't care. His thrusts were fast and rough, I couldn't keep up. I could feel his orgasm building and he had no intention of pulling out. Kai continued to slam into me until he reached his peak. He filled me with his seed and when he finally pulled out I could feel it dripping from my pussy.
Kai helped me get up and as he was untying his belt, his hot breath was on my neck. "Welcome to the cult, baby."
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