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#Maybe if the woman forced through birth smiled and acted like a good mother then the Baby-Eating Tyrant wouldn't have ate so many babies
bonefall · 7 months
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Jesus Christ. I've never read Yellowfang's Secret and it's insane to me that what we see of Lizard is supposed to be "evil woman" like from the screenshots you posted this is really and truly someone who is being forced to bear children. Forced to care for them. Lashing out that her husband can keep doing his job and she has to drop everything to care for children she didn't want. And that horrible shit from Ragged oh my God dude.
It's SO fucked up!! That exchange with Hollyflower is HORRIFYING!!!
Like, during the Brokenkit Handoff, she's shouting about not wanting to raise every unwanted kit and how badly she hates this, only for Raggedstar to start bellowing at her to shut her mouth. He's able to "convince" her based on on "ambition" they slapped onto the character in that moment, but when you really step back and look at the context, it just reads like she realizes she has no fucking choice
She's the only queen in the nursery. There was no "saying no"
Especially not to the deputy
NO ONE cares about Lizardstripe as a person, even though she's obviously really uncomfortable about being forced to birth and raise children
"I know she doesn't want this. That's too fucking bad. It's her duty as a woman" -Sagewhisker
I can't get over it. This book doesn't treat her like a person, it treats her like a bad vessel. She's a horrible mother because she DOESN'T WANT THIS, and the narrative condemns her, even partially blames her for A BABY-KILLING TYRANT, because she wasn't happy about the situation she was forced into.
Like... jesus christ!!
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whatevermywpis · 1 year
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𝓣𝓻𝓪𝓹𝓹𝓮𝓭 𝓲𝓷 𝔂𝓸𝓾𝓻 𝓭𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓶𝓼
﹒⪩⪨﹒ℙ𝕣𝕠𝕝𝕠𝕦𝕘𝕖: 𝟘-𝟙﹒⪩⪨﹒
𝐏𝐫𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐮𝐞: 𝐖𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐭𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐲𝐞𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐝.
┌─── ∘°❉°∘ ───┐
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└─── °∘❉∘° ───┘
You jolted awake unable to recognize your surroundings, your eyes flash through the halls of endless books and readers burying themselves in their stories, you were at... a library?
Just a few hours ago you were playing the 21st character route belonging to a heavily criticized game called 'Project Fairytale', famous for its absurd and tedious gameplay that takes a minimum of two years to finish all routes, which was estimated by its creator. Not only that but the game forces you to play in order from easy to hard in least to favourite.
Judging by the Victorian-style clothing you wore and the dusty counter you were behind you played the tragic side character number 23, (Y/n) (L/n), yes they had your exact name for some reason. Playing the neutral stance in most stories of neither helping nor harming the protagonist, (Y/n) was the fan favourite brutally honest, cute librarian, of their town. Appearing in act 3 route for through name in 'Burning Kingdom of Roses' character Deuce Spade, act 2 route 1 suggests the protagonist to a book in 'Trading seas of the Count' character Floyd Leech, act 7 route 5 being carried and kidnapped by Rook Hunt in the 'Poison love' character Epel Felmier, and act 4 route 8 when Silver kisses their forehead in 'Sleeping Kingdom' character Lilia Vanrouge.
"(Y/n)-chan~!! How's my favourite librarian-" "You lost one of my books again." The love interest in front of you was Cater Diamond and judging by his appearance, (Y/n) seems to be still in the Rose Kingdom right now. "What are you talking ab-" "A kid came walking into my library one day saying you dropped this book and didn't know how to contact you so he returned the book for you."
Cater Diamond, who would like to be called Cater only, was from a family of five and is currently a commoner due to his father giving up on the nobility status of duke during a family conflict. Now he's working and living like a commoner without any care, however, that would have been much easier telling how far you are in the story if there wasn't the fact Cater always dressed like a commoner when in and out of the dukedom.
Closing in on the subject there's a total of four found duke families and the royal family, all five love interests lived a very interesting lifestyle of rags to riches type. Making them at most a bit relatable to the audiences, but also have their own charms and style in characteristic.
" (Y/n) I can explain-" "ah, I'm only forgiving you because I'm not in the mood to get angry." Cater was a playful person, even when he was fully aware of the fact people are looking at him with pity. "I'm not in the mood to deal with you today, next time I will hit you and make you pay."
" It must have been hard for you, especially knowing that Deuce's mom died." Cater gave you a pitiful smile, you hated this gut-wrenching feeling of pain and despair. "Looks like Deuce is an orphan now, he's such a good kid though and his mom was a really lovely woman."
"It... can't be helped, maybe it was best for her to rest after her eventful life." Despite being side characters, people who play such roles have stories that are left untold, only those closest to them would know.
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Deuce's mother whose name you don't even know died before the story started through an illness she had after giving birth to Deuce, her story wasn't very pretty. Born as an orphan, she worked her way into becoming a maid for the House of Spade, it should have been fine, she could have lived a happy life after 3 or 4 years yet she was assigned to be the heir's personal maid. That was when she met him, oh foolish woman she fell for his lies and deceits, living under the guise that she would marry him yet when she told him she was pregnant reality hit her. Days and nights she ran with her unborn child, and at the end she came to your father's library, a girl barely nineteen coming to her eighth month of pregnancy.
"Please! I'm begging you to help me and my child!"  She said holding your father's hands. Her tears soaked the thin dress she wore, (Y/n) was two, but even they knew how bad it had come if this was the result.
"Calm down miss, I'll help you... after all, I know what it's like having to raise a child." Your father... no their father took in the pitiful woman.
After giving birth to her child, she disappeared and the librarian continue to live with his child before she left a promise was made to repay the old librarian. Yet when she returned to fulfil it...
"(Y/n)~ (Y/n)!! Are you daydreaming again?" You were startled, how much time had passed? "Sheesh, I knew you had a bad habit of spacing out but really?"
"Sorry Cater... You shouldn't be wasting time here with me. Your sisters would be mad if they knew." Whatever happened in the past should have stayed in the past, reminding it only brings unwanted memories.
"So mean~ you're younger than me and yet you're such a granny." A mischievous glint appeared on his face. "Take care (Y/n), it's obvious you're also hurting."
It's obvious you were a good actor, Cater didn't even notice the difference between you and the original (Y/n), or maybe he did but brushed it off, the original (Y/n) was cold and mysterious but not unpredictable. It was obvious (Y/n) didn't have such a bad childhood despite not having a mother, with the death of their father however things did change for the better it for the worse. You know their story but, what was your story?
"̸̡̪͍̀̎͌̊͂̍̾̄͝͠M̴̞̈́̅̈́̔̒͛͘͘͝o̷̠̭͌͌̈́̆̈̋͛́̚͘m̷̻͇̮̫̾̀̓̓̃̓̍͠͝?̵̺̰̘̙̯̔̅͊̿̅͆"̷̤̬͚̘̰͕̓̌ ̴̦̀́̾̈́́̆͗.̵̠̏̈ ̷̡̭͉̱̽̀̇͑̿̽̒̃̇͘.̴̳̖̙̳͖̼̌̈́̀̓ ̷͇͚̲̱̫̪̺̐̈͒̂͑̓̾͘͜͜͠"̵̰̩̼͓̒̕W̵̦̝͇͍̍̿h̷̯̩̞͓̩͖̀̕͜͜ẙ̵̺̝̪̕ ̷̲̳͍̤̪͑͐͒̒̃̉͘̕̚͠c̸̝̼̘̥̬̦̼͎̭̪͌ą̴̗̻͋̉n̴͚̎'̶̡̬͔̺͉̹̪̰̥́̈́̎̇̌̊͠͠͠ͅt̴̼̯̝̲̰̞̹̽̉̉͝ ̷̖͔̪͆̉̇̌̑͘ͅy̵̧̢̯̩͍̩̓͂̿̾̌͛̃̊́͘ͅͅo̷̧̞̙͇͇̫͎͍̫͗̋ų̷̧̱͈͍̰͕̤̖̓̒͛͂̅̈̅̐̓̍͜ ̸̨̣͍̥̝̝̩͉͗͝ͅb̷̞̄́̈̈́e̸͎̣̮̞̭̙͖̤̼͆̌̔͝ ̷̡̨̛̰̠̠͙̋͂̍̌̎̍n̷̢̛̠̳̬̪̩̜̠͓̩͛̃̿̈͊̈́͆́o̵̠̝̼͎̔̌̐̄͑̾́͒͠ŗ̷̩̖̬̹͔̌̉̍͑͐̎m̶͙̖̪͙̥̮͔̆̈́͒̅̔̀̕̚ạ̸̢̺͉͉̠̝̞̼̤̀ḻ̵̝̜͑̈́̐̎̉̚̕?̸̭̚!̵̨̥̲̙͍̹̩̥̼̱͘ ̴̨͍̬̄́̓I̸̤͎͚̓̈́̒̌̚ ̶̺̼͙͚͉͊̋̍̃̚͜ǩ̵̮̦̘̦̭̞͙n̷̨̛̮̯̫̯̎͐̐̑̍̊̐o̴͓̤̪͕̝̻̣͌̏͜͜͠ŵ̶̼̠̲̝̻̪͕̍̇̾͝͠ ̵̨̡͇̰̝̬͚̗̀̐̆͂̓̾͋̈̕͠y̴̘̰̪̟̐̀͜ǫ̵̻̝̳̳̼̘̝̂̓̏̎̒̇̑̽̆̈́͜ͅṵ̵̡͉̤͎͓̲̣̊͊̈͂͒̎̽͐̓͜͠'̵̼̺͕̠̪̟̟͗̇̕r̸̗̹̺̣̭̝̫̝̩̫̓͊́͐̓ë̴̻̳͎̳͙͍̱͖̼́̀̾͘͜͝ ̷̛̤͛̉͊̅̈́̾ǹ̶̯̪̳̈́̔̀͠o̷͔͍͓̫̤͕̰̊t̴̞̱̱̹̀̽̍͗̇́̍̃͠͠ ̴̨̢̱̲̠͙̖̖͈̳̋͛͌͆̎ş̴̣̥͚̲̘̦̎̇̑̒̅̏͋́̍̕o̷̢̬̹͖̦̬͂̀̌̆̆m̵͚͚̞̩̳͓̲͎̎͐̀̈́̒͒͆͘ͅe̴͔̠̙͙͉̗̔͋̈́̅͊̽̎͜ ̸̞͍͖̪̠́̋̈́͂͆̑̇̕͠m̸̳͕͊̇̌̌̆͘͘e̸̛̖̗̣̽̈͆̆̚n̸̡̪̹̱͎̳͇̣̘̪̍t̸̤́ä̴͇͎̺̙̰͉̕l̶̳̮͎̣̈́̈́̑͆̈́̏l̷̡̢͈͙̹̮̅͒̏̂y̷̨̱̱͇̻̩͈͔̙͛ ̷̡͙̺̠̭̠̭̂̿̋͑s̶̨̰̹̊͝ͅḯ̸̧̦͓̗̞̺̼͖c̶̩͇̟̻̫̩̊̾͆̕͜k̴̫̙̫̽͒ ̶̛̻͉̎̐̊͗̈͒̊͜͝c̸̨̛̜̤̲̣͙̥̩͍̰̋̀̓̍̏́̇̆̋h̵̞̳̩̭̩̟͕̺̼͈̆͂͑̈́̆̑̏̈́͝ì̸͍l̷̨̨͖͉͓̳̮̬͚̀͆̀̑̾̈́͠d̷̜͈̪͋̀̈́́̿͛͠͝!̶͖͕̅̉͋̕͠ͅ!̷̲̦́͒̈̅͛͌͐̃͝͝"̷̛̪̦̓̆̆̈́̌͂͜͝ ̵̳̻͚̺̬̆͝.̸̧̰̮̦̼͍͓͈̎͑̀̐̇̈́̃͛͐ ̶̰̠̞̠̪̥̇̃̂̐̋͐̕.̶̧͚͚̖͉͖̼͉̈̊̇̉͊̆̾͝ ̵̢̨̦̫̟͎̬͕͇̹͋͐͊̈́.̶̛̪̭͇͔͚̲͎̟̗̒͒̅͛̆̃ ̷̧̭͎̹̙̫̖͍̠͒͒͛̾͝͠.̷̡̫̻̈́͗̎̕ ̵̧̞͉̖̯̥̲̉.̸͕̯̩̗͌͛̑̈́͒̅̈͘͘ ̴̡̡̡̮̈́̊̿̇̈́̕̕"̴̢͔͓̙̣̗̯͇͈̜͛̊̇̌̿̀Ị̸̜͙͔̾̋͝ ̴̢̿̐̃̀̓̒͘͝͠ͅw̶̩̱͚͕͂̔͌̽̄͠i̸̜̙̻͋̊̿̉̃͝s̷̡͓̹̲̑͐̎͌̒̍̋̅̚ͅh̵͙̤̫̤̩̗̯̻̭̓ͅę̷̨̟̠̝̭̖̗̫̩͗̋̽́̀̿̕d̶̛̠̫̪̗̳̝͌̌̔̃͜ ̵̭͙͉͚̪̿̄̓̾Ȋ̸̟̞̾̂ ̶̝̜͕̲̝̞̥͉̘́̓̅͐̌͘͜͠d̷̻̳̏̈́í̵̞̭̈́̈́̔̂̚͠d̴̲͚͎̹̙͇͐̾̽n̷̛̞͖̙̯̳̱̆̒̔̂̊͠'̶̧̭̬͍͇̯͚͐̎̋̒̒̑̓̾ṯ̴̩̬̱̲̤͖͖͎́́̏̏̎̔̄̆ ̶̩̥͙̱̝̠̞̟̫̙̊̌͑̂̓͑̔́̈́h̸͙̭̄̋̅̄͐̋͆̌͝a̴͕͋̏͜v̸̮̬̖̻̠̥̩͂̏͂͋͊̋͑͠͠ę̷̧̮͈̜̲̿̓́̃͜͠ ̷̠̭̺̠̘̲̫̾̚͜y̷͍͓̠̬̜͙̲͎̻͂͛͒ớ̸̧͖̖̞̠̳̝̾̀̄̄̔̓̃͐u̷̟̖͎̞̐͛̇̒̿!̶̢̖̗̙̙́̍̇̀̎̂͐ ̵̛̞͎͖̈́̑̈́̽͊̓̾̃̿ͅǏ̷̘̺͉͖̞͆́̌̿̚͜͜͝ ̵̢̨͓̟̳̥̘̫̞͆͒͠c̸̖̩͔͓̠̼̰̗͔̦̔̄̆͐̃͑̽̄o̵̪̭͓̩̔́͑̈̉̌͛͜͠ͅu̷͇̲͋̾͌͒l̴̨̢̼̹̙̖̩̓̐̓̒͝͠ͅd̵͚̑͆̃̈̇̈ ̷̡̮̰̈́̌̽̚ͅh̸͔̆a̵̧̢̘̳̰̠̦̾͋̆ͅṿ̴̝̆͆̽̎̍e̴̢͆͊͝ ̸̡̧̟̱̞͖̳̤͖̄̓͆l̴͈͌͗͘ě̴̟̌́͛̅͛͘͠f̸̪̘̫̒̓͜t̶̤̤̲̞̹̆͗̅̀̋̿̕͝͝ͅ ̸̡̦̠̱͖̮̮̘͐̋̅̇h̷̘̪͆̈́͛͐̓̔͗i̷͙̰͎̳̣͍̣̰̻̅͆̀͌͌͑̄̈́̈́͜m̵͔̳̹̪̊̇̆̔̕,̴̢̧̥̝̭̂̐̈́͗̉̿͋̒ ̶̧̡̖̏̀̅͌I̶̲͖̟͖̺̺̋͐͒͑̕ ̶̨̭͓̩͇̣̣̰̠̼͆c̶̢̛̲̯̞̮̖̩̖͆̈́̇͛͒̎̏̕ọ̸̆̾͆̊̀̃͒͌ǔ̷̧̧͕͖͔͇͚̈́̂̾̈́̑̃l̵̢̞̤͇͓̻͉̠̤͉͊̌̐d̸̯̩͓͚̲͇̣̯͗́̀̅ ̶̡̛͚͕̣̽̌̓̄̾̔͆͋̊ĥ̶̨̧̟̻̃̏̽̓̿á̷̧͚̟͖̰̆̑̅̄̾̉̚͠v̷͈̹͙̼̹͙̦̝͋͌̌̅͋̆̋͑͌ͅͅę̷͇̺̱̤̲̲̾ͅ ̵̳̩̜̳͇̟̻̌̄̅̈̂̇d̷̺͈̹̼́͊̎̀̅̄̏͠ͅọ̷͚̓̽̀̕ǹ̶͚͎̼͇̭̣̮̫͐͜ͅé̵̡̫̥̩̜̜͇̈́̓͂̀͂̆̈́̕ ̵̡̟̤̳͔̼̲̠̖̖͒͐̋̉͝͠s̷͙̗̎̉̊̈̕͜o̵͕̺͓̲͔̘̺̥̟͒̑̈́̍́̌͑͝ ̵̼̥̲̼͕̲̺̈̉͊́̀͛̉̇͛͠m̵͔̍̒̽͂̑̄u̴̲̩̝͍̘̿̐̉͂̀ĉ̴̰̬͔̯̞̱̝́͊̆̎̑̄͛̈́͠h̸̨̟̣͊̈͝ ̵̛̬͇̙̞̭̪̗͚̳̹́͋̆͠b̴̩̺̣̗͔͆̔̏̉͂̋̽̓é̸̡̪͓͎̹̱̻͙͌̒͘ţ̸̦̹̰̻̝̺̺͔̟̇̊̑̅͊̾̕͝t̸̝̠̝̱̱͍͍͈͉̿̋̄̒̃̏̕ę̷̛̜̘̖̥̮͎̯̣͑͗̓͌r̸̡̡̰̎̓̏̑̔!̸̧̳̥͇̥̺͍̙͓̚̕!̴̧̢̛̬̠̠̠͈͈́͒́̔̔͑̒̚̕"̷͕̱̑͆̐̒
"Yahoo~ Librarian (Y/n)? What are you spacing out for?" A menace appeared to bring you back from the dream.
Ace Trappola, the famous prankster and troublemaker of the Trappola house, to put it lightly the Trappola house was the most chill of the four houses and genuinely doesn't care what happens. Ace was nobly born and his parents were happy, he's not the heir but that also meant he can just enjoy life without that much burden. However, this also meant he was made to cause trouble, so he just sneaks out of the dukedom and hangs out with the commoners, not entirely relatable but he was still lovable in his own way.
"Who are you-" "Again?! This is our tenth meeting (Y/n)!!" Ace fumes pouting at your indifference.
He's a nice dude, and honestly, you always hoped that there were more people with lives like him, he's a genuinely good person maybe causing too many problems and troubles but he'll be alright.
"Yeah yeah, you're not that much of a regular Ace. If I had a madol for the number of people who know me and I remember their names... I'd have a meal. Which isn't a lot but it's still strange that it happened." That gave Ace the brain cell workout, honestly Ace is a fun one to tease when playing the game.
"Ah you don't make sense sometimes, I guess it's a side effect from being you, huh?" You should be mad but then again you pity Ace for having one brain cell.
"Haha very funny, what are you here for Ace Trap-" "Shhhh!!! You shouldn't say my last name so openly idiot!!" Says the person who casually gives their name away.
"I'm here to give you these." He said pushing a bag of sweets into your arms, high quality too. "Heard you and your errand boy lost an important boy so I thought I'd give something to cheer you guys up."
"How caring. I can buy my sweets just fine." You shoved the bag of sweets back to him, not so fun fact, Ace at some point had started stealing and you're just worried he'll get you in jail.
"Hmph, I guess you didn't need such lowly stuff-" "Ace you know I would never take advantage of your status as a noble." This was the main problem with Ace, he's the type to get close to someone and then not notice how he gets easily taken advantage of.
"Idiot... I'm meaning it, Deuce has been having a hard time no? Just do it for him will you?"
Not waiting for your answer Ace ran away leaving the high quality at your counter as you could only shake your head unknowingly smiling at the gift. In the story and before Ace and Deuce were always a pair, just like Cater and Trey, all connected to the librarian who was later on killed by a few jealous noble daughters, the only person who had no connection to the librarian was his royal highness and future king Riddle Roseheart.
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The life of a librarian wasn't too hard to handle, arranging borrowed books, cleaning up messes, keeping it quiet, and shushing people was your favourite thing to do since you have so much power in your domain plus you can take home any book you wanted. How are you making money? Simple, you charge a fee for borrowing books, and thank the past librarian for making this method, besides the fee is affordable by standard and the library was technically private and owned by you.
Then everyone's favourite time came, closing time, quickly ushering the readers out you clean up the rest of the remnants and went home for the day. You could have gone straight home, but there was one place you wanted to visit that was so legendary in the game it became a thing in real life. Yes, you were talking about the Clover house's bakery, a bit classy and expensive but who cares the art used for the pastries was beautifully delicious.
"Outta the way!"
"Hey, I've been waiting all afternoon!"
"I worked months for their most famous sweets, back off!!"
You encountered a problem, it was a long line of bloodthirsty customers, well according to the game the pastries here were so good people no matter rich or poor would gather just to buy everything.
"Large crowd, huh?" Someone said behind you, turning around your eyes widen at the sight of Trey Clover, in the shabbiest disguise, how did you tell it was him? That Clover mark wasn't covered up properly that's what.
"Lord Cl-" "Shhh! I don't wanna startle the crowd." He said pulling you to an alleyway.
"You need to stop calling me by honorifics (Y/n), how did you know it was me?" Big bro vibes, Trey had some big bro vibes.
"You should work on covering that stigma up." You pointed at the light mark that looked like a clover.
A stigma is a marking that appears on the body of the four house's heir and current duke, there's no actual way of knowing who's going to be the heir since it's like a lottery and depending on the number of children that were born it's an often occurrence that your own might not be your heir and instead is your niece or nephew. Once the other stigma starts showing up that's when the story starts, even the crown prince has a stigma.
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" I guess I just have to be careful next time, hah... others don't seem to notice it though." Trey smiled touching the not-so-hidden mark.
"Hold on let me check if I brought any make-up." It's funny how there's a lot of make-up found when you looked around the library, people do be throwing money around. "Found it. Just stand still..."
"That... tickles a bit." He giggled as you applied the powder lightly, the mark wasn't that visible but you just had to make sure.
When a stigma appears it is meant to symbolize change or succession, in this case, the current duke had two choices, either to peacefully let the marked heir succeed or convince the chosen heir to convince the marked heir for the rightful position. We all know what happens when a battle for succession happens, lots of interesting scenes happen, and the most memorable is when Deuce's stigma appears. Due to most of the circumstances, those who are involved with the stigma, by involving you mean know of which heir was going to be next, often die or are locked away from the prying eyes of society.
"You don't come here that often (Y/n)-chan, where are you planning on getting any pastries." You walked away deciding not to buy any, were you seriously going to wait another two years to buy? Hell nah.
"Well, I've been discouraged enough to say I'm not buying any." Trey laughed, he knew (Y/n) was the type to give up once something seemed intimidating.
"Here, I wasn't planning to eat them but the bakers just insisted that I have some." If it wasn't obvious his visit and appearance were to sneak out and check on the bakery.
Trey Clover's parents had a really good ending when they formed their relationship, but the twist was that Trey's father was technically a baker and a commoner too so there was some bad blood between Trey's mother and her parents but seeing how he came out safe to say things worked out. Except for when the stigma appears, mostly because Trey's reputation for having a commoner father wasn't the best look for him.
Trey was mostly bullied for being half noble and half commoner despite being a part of the four houses, so when he received the mark Trey used it as an excuse to avoid people even more, abusing the power an heir has over others. He runs away from his home to the bakeries almost any and every time, his parents do make sure he doesn't get hurt every time he gets home.
"I don't think I should-" "No, really have some. You looked like you needed some with how pale you are." He doesn't deserve hate from the NPCs, that's why his fan base is so big.
"Well, I can't receive it, besides I was planning to buy some ingredients for dinner soon." The air seems to be a bit chilly.
"My... deepest condolences to him.." if you hadn't noticed by this point, all love interests are often connected and know each other one way or another.
"Don't be... it's Deuce we're talking about so it's best you tell him that instead of me." There was no way of knowing how much trouble things will bring you now that you've been acquainted with most of the love interests in the Kingdom of Roses.
"Now bring this home with you!!" "No!"
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"That stubborn a-" You lost and took the bag of pastries, well at least dessert is set.
The one thing about ingredients is the pricing which is either your bargain and release all that stress from the day or you're forced to buy expensive things that are scams. Thank god you helped that old lady on her market trip every weekend.
"50!" "20!" "40!" "20!" "25! And that is my last offer you thwat!" Just another day at the market.
"Fish on sale! Fish on sale! Half price 'cause it's closing time." Sadly you hate making certain fish food.
"Oi take a look over here vegetables! You'll never find something fresher than this!" Well, at least the prices were negotiable.
Yeah, nothing particular for a night market but who cares, for a librarian you were loaded, at least that title of baron helped in some aspect. Now you wouldn't just choose to buy at this place for no reason, that's because in the game.
"Thief! I caught a thief stealing mah trinkets." That familiar thick Western accent was definitely signalling you were in the right place.
"Let me go! You got the wrong person, I didn't touch anything it was your so-" "Shut up you noisy brat! You and that little rat can explain it to the guards when they arrive!"
To explain the situation of why and what we fast forward in time to the story 'The beautiful count and his deathly poison' and more specifically route 6 Act 5 'Spring Festival' where the introduction of two assassins known as the 'white deaths' appears. Not that they played a huge role but you were down for some heirs to inherit the Library and title once you run into trouble just so a certain main lead steals the deal to that place after your untimely death.
Those two assassins were originally from the Rose kingdom with the names of Lily and James, sadly they died at the hands of Rook, in order to prevent that and to find a good heir you pick out the outstanding assassins for their quick eyes and carefulness, after all as side characters you hardly ever get a good ending.
"Now now, there's no need to act like that everyone. I'll pay for the damages~" perks of being able to live comfortably? Money.
"Sir/Lady you don't know what you're getting into! These two are thieves and street rats!" How... boring, you really don't give a damn about it, Deuce was probably still mourning and you got to cheer that boy up.
"Ya da ya da, look I get it but they're my servants~ and it's my duty to punish them not you." An awkward silence filled the air, and the two "thieves" looked at you confused but seemed to play along, well anything to save their skin ain't it?
"W-well in that case-" "They're just checking for some good stuff, in case you haven't noticed since they are under my protection and work under me you really don't have the authority over them." You might have broken character a bit with how you were acting.
'Please stay in the Character module, the prologue is far from complete Player. This is your first warning.'
"Now may I have them back?" Restrictions are restrictions, that is why you were going to face a punishment soon after the scene ends.
"...Scram ya rats! Don't go touching things like that again." The two were quickly released as you threw the stall owner three silver coins, which was the equivalent of 30 madols.
The two assassins quietly followed you throughout the market, though they didn't say anything you could tell they were quite grateful for saving their skin earlier. Now it was true that they tried to steal but could you blame starving children for falling into temptation? As much of a cold person (Y/n) was there was also a limit to how they could get, that's because the original (Y/n) used to take care of people like this, up until the point of their father's death.
"Um... M-miss/sir...?" The girl asked pulling your clothing.
"Hm?" You were almost reaching home, looks like they did decide to follow you.
"Why would you save us? You should have just ignored us." The boy said pulling his sister's hand away from your clothing."
"For kids from the street you two are much more educated than you look~ well if I said I'm looking for helpers would you believe me?" You coldly said as a painful feeling struck your heart, the system couldn't pick a better time.
"No." The boy was James, at least that's what he was called after death and by the second assassin his sister Lily.
"Then why would you follow me? I could just be doing a good deed by helping you. There's no need for you to follow me like that." They had no place to go back to, well you didn't wanna take advantage of that fact, it was... disgusting of you to use people's weakness against them.
"Because you... don't look like the type of person to do so." Really, they were weird for children, but then again you were just as weird weren't you?
"Think what you wanna think~ the one thing I can promise you though." You looked into their fierce orange eyes. "If you agree to follow me you won't have to get in trouble again anytime soon."
So I'm the end you came back to your home with food and two adopted children, man did you just succeed in life by finding random kids for heirs and now won't have to worry until the story starts.
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Did you really think you wouldn't meet any more trouble? You forgot about Deuce, Deuce Spade to be exact but right now he hasn't been taken in by the Spades yet so back to calling him Deuce.
"Deuce! I'm home!" You shouted.
You lived by yourself, well not exactly yourself since there was also Deuce but you were a noble so that meant you also had another mansion! Under your name... 'you' sold it through the day 'you' became the head librarian, some things just didn't stay for long. 'You' took Deuce and his mom into your care as 'your' servants, however since her passing there's only you and Deuce left.
The house was quiet, the kids stared in awe probably because of its structure, you had the same look when playing Deuce's route though the place was pretty much broken down in his route. Footsteps rushed from the stairs and then came to Deuce, his swollen eyes stared at yours then afterwards noticed the kids holding your hands.
"Your home... (Y/n) why did you bring these kids home?" Although he was still mourning Deuce had put up a front to ensure that he could stay strong in front of you.
"I thought you could use a helping hand, besides they're only a year younger than you." Taking your grocery bags, Deuce started to stare at the kids for a little longer.
"Actually we're 13, you don't look that old to call us kids" Between the two James was definitely the brasher one.
"Well you two have fun, me and Deuce have something to talk about. Oh and please don't burn the drawing room, that's the only place you can't destroy other than my room and Deuce's." The kids were definitely shocked you allowed it to happen but still went and explore the place.
For the last of the card boys, Deuce Spade had a sad fate, his mom went through all that and in the end left him at the age of 16 and 'you' became his temporary guardian until he reaches 19. Throughout this time he got into lots of trouble with drunks and guilds all around him, and the real trouble starts when he got his stigma.
After receiving the stigma the House of Spade immediately looked for him after an outsider witness claimed to see it on a boy similar to the current duke his 'father'. Deuce of course had no choice but to part with the librarian who took care of him and his mother. The death of the said librarian was ultimately warranted with this choice, and after a while of torture and humiliation, Deuce received the librarian's head as a warning if he ever decided to go against the House of Spade.
You weren't dying today, oh well you just have to hide Deuce long enough then, it's not like you could decide for him but if you were to choose you'd like to live.
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"Why are we cooking again...?" Deuce said confusingly whisking some eggs.
"You didn't think we were just gonna sit down and talk, did you?" You asked while frying some onions, thank god the kitchen still had some useful utilities, you would have starved if they didn't.
"You... don't seem like the person to do this... and I've never seen you cook." It's true that the real (Y/n) would never but you were a foodie, food is life, food is love, and you would make use of all those recipe books lying to waste.
"Well, I did say we'd talk, besides I never joined your cooking session with your mom." You really need to stop being up to this boy's momma since he looked like he was gonna break down again.
"R-right, Mom really liked making food. I guess cooking does really bring back a few memories of her." A bittersweet smile graced his face, no wonder he was a love interest.
"I never really understood how she was able to love a child that wasn't hers. It's just sad to see how loving had hurt her so much." You were kind of jealous of (Y/n), how they didn't even need to do much and yet they're loved and cared for by all these people.
"Loving didn't really hurt her you know? Loving my bastard of a dad was the wrong move though." Deuce might have never been his dad, but from his story, you could tell how much he resented the man. " But loving me, and you. She might not say it out loud but it probably was one of the best things she did, I think."
"Hm, I guess it wouldn't hurt to think like that." You don't know her, yet you were grateful that she had taken care of (Y/n) and Deuce up until now, so now it's your turn to protect them.
"I miss her... I miss her so much..." Deuce broke down.
"Me too... but you wouldn't want her to see you like this for too long, it's good to let it out sometimes but you have to understand that there's a point where you have to move on." Not every breakdown is about screaming and crying out your heart, it could just be you holding yourself and thinking why, how did it happen?
So you ended up making too much food, at least Lily and James had a big appetite, but more than half of the food you made was gone. Deuce needed a little bit of talking but other than that he was good, he still clings to you like how he would to the original (f/l).
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In (Y/n)'s bedroom you took note of a few things that weren't originally in the story, first was how many useful books they had in their room as if they had prepared it for a long time, second was the countless papers and materials relating to moon studies in their room.
Moon study was just basically learning of the moon cycle but in this world, the moon was an important element in rituals, so from that fact you deduct that (Y/n) was trying to perform so type of spell. You're not sure what type of spell it was but when you took a good look at yourself in the mirror, you noticed a moon-shaped stigma above your belly button, which looked exactly like a moon tattoo you got at the same place.
You were wondering, what if (Y/n) was trying to perform a body switch spell and it resulted in this, you were dead in the real world and you knew that because you J̵̟̺̗͍̫̺̤̙̗̅͑̅̅̂̉̕u̴̼̯͛̆͠m̷̻̦͇̝̺͚̟͂̂̾͛̍̀̓̉̕̚͜ͅp̷͕͆ė̸̗̌̒̏̇͊͋͝͝͠d̴͉̩̭̣͓̖̲̈́̉͜͜ so there's no way (Y/n) could transfer to your body so how?
'Player, are you ready for your punishment?'
A systematic voice was heard behind your back, and looking behind you saw the blue screen with those words in bold. You nearly forgot about it. Excruciating pain, memories, nightmares, and the torture that took a toll on your body. That was 'punishment'.
"..." The moon looked so pretty to you, maybe it was because you had the best view in the entire house. Burn marks are present around your body as the day slowly ends.
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Morning came, it was gloomy and well raining, in contrast to the beautiful blue moon from the night before the skies of the next morning rained hard. Well, you would have some difficulties going to the library in weather like this one but you like the rain so who cares.
"It's raining cats and dogs today, I wonder if we should even go and open up the library today?" Deuce was giving you the 'go and I'll break your neck look' while the kids were looking like 'What's a library?'
"Don't even think about it, besides we have things to clean today now that your home and don't have an excuse to go out." Yes, rain day was cleaning day, as much as you loved the rain it also came with cleaning.
Bang bang.
"Who the fu-" "Language!" You carefully walked to the door holding a butter knife in your hand, don't ask where you got it.
Swinging the door open you found a passed-out person with reddish hair, lying at your front door, an injury on their back, and lots of scratches.
"Deuce get the first aid kit and some towels!! Someone's definitely going to meet Death in a few hours!!"
┍━☽【❖】☾━┑
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June 21st.
Kokichi’s birthday wasn’t ever a date he felt the need to care for in the slightest. Just a date on a piece of paper he was shown in his files at the orphanage he lived in all his life.
No parents to buy him big gifts or make a cake.
No friends to simply wish him a celebration of his birth.
All he ever gotten over the years what the title of a new age from a date on a paper and maybe some kicks or arm punches from the rowdy kids who try to count his age through pains and at a young age be forced to take a picture in a skirt or a dress for the sake of the orphan mothers to update his file.
So it really shouldn’t have been a shock when asked what he wanted to do for his birthday and his response was, “Hm? Oh I don’t care, let’s just ignore it.”
Well, Shuichi, Kokichi’s dear sweet boyfriend of three years now, was more than surprised sitting across from the violet eyed cutie in the local Starbuck of their living area sipping his Caffe Americano. Kokichi just shrugged at the look, “It’s really no big deal Shumai. Birthdays have always been a silly thing to me, remember? I’m perfectly fine just acting like it’s another day.”  Shuichi’s eyes narrow in a sad expression as he leans forward and spoke, “But we’ve done some things for your birthday like dinner-” “Dinner is a normal thing since it can be a simple dinner not a birthday thing. Honest, Shumai, I really don’t mind not celebrating my birthday.”
Shuichi sighs and leans back in his chair, listening to Kokichi’s changed sentence topic while he watches him talk with a smile, feeling his stomach turn in question. Yeah he understands why Kokichi dislikes his birthday but he still desires to prove he’s worthy of a good birthday. For a few years now the little gremlin has made the birthdays among his friends and the lovers including Shuichi himself special beyond words. Hosting great dinner parties, Gifts they all love, The pure energy he brings, Not to mention the first birthday the two spent as a large relationship with their good friends and fellow survivors of the killing game of Danganronpa he went out of his way and comfort zone to give Shuichi a good birthday in a good trip in Japan’s countryside with all of them and ending the night with his favorite true crime documentary. 
All he wants to do is make Kokichi feel special like he was to them.
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Kokichi walked alongside Miu after a long shift of work in their workshop, the sky was a beautiful blue purple like shade with the lighter shaded clouds like cotton candy sprinkled over a backdrop. 
The strawberry blonde woman wraps an arm around the smaller with a smile, “So,” Said she, “What do you want to eat for dinner lil man?” Kokichi giggles and thinks for a moment with a finger pressed against his chin. “Hmm~ How about curry?” Miu smiled bigger and gave him a squeeze, chirping, “Hell yeah! Got you boo!”
The two soon made it to the steps of the door of their shared home, unlocking the emerald painted and golden paint covered fake vines door, and removed their shoes to their indoor slippers when they got past the door. The dark haired gentleman reaches for the light switch, but stops when Miu drags him further into the home, snickering. “What are you doing Miu?” He asked, confusion more clear in his voice than his body language.
He flinched when a sudden light shined in front of him, as his purple eyes focused soon he recognized the faces of his dears as well as his childhood best friends, his D.I.C.E. followers if you will, standing in the living room smiling and eagerly welcoming him in. Confusion and slight annoyance dread swirled in his chest as he looked at all of them and soon Shuichi who walked over to him with a smile and a wine glass full of what he assumed at first was wine but as soon as he saw the shade and bubbles he knew it was grape Fanta. “What’s going on?” He asked, accepting the glass handed to them as well as Shuichi’s hand holding his other. The detective smiled and said, “I know you don’t like your birthday, but none of us wanted to leave you alone on this day. To you your birthday was a day no one cared but to us, it’s a day you were brought to us and if you allow us to, to love and adore you now and forever more.”
Kokichi felt his eyes tear up in small tears before he got to his toes and gave Shuichi a smooch on his lips and a smile and a tiny mischievous cackle.
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peachycoreroo · 3 years
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the forbidden fruit | zeke yeager
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summary: zeke was like a second father to you and you were his favorite little girl. maybe, it wasn't normal to like your dad's best friend that much, but who cares if it's normal when it feels this good.
pairing: dad’s best friend!zeke x college fem!reader
genre: smut, pwp
word count: 5.4k
warnings: age gap, vaginal penetration, lowkey pseudo-cest bc you call zeke 'uncle', daddy kink, oral fem!receiving, fingering, oral m!receiving, mini degradation, praise kink, a few spanks, choking, zeke spits in your mouth, usage of ‘slut’, ‘whore’ and ‘slutty’, bunny as a pet name, kinda exhibitionism?, manipulation, corruption kink, dub-con vibes but you actually want it, jealousy, mentions of alcohol, smoking, dumbification, manhandling, unprotected sex (pls wrap it up kids), creampie, size kink
authors note: this is for @weepinglevi​‘s adult movie tropes collab, thank you sm for letting me join!! def check out the other amazing fics in this collab<3 this is a lot darker than my other stuff so far, but i had so much fun writing it, so enjoy my first piece for aot!! here’s a link to my masterlist
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uncle zeke, or uncle zuzu as you liked to call him when you were still a child, has always been your favorite person since you were little. technically, you weren’t blood-related, but you might as well have been with how integrated into your family he was.
him and your father were best friends since middle school and you did call him ‘daddy’ a lot back then as a three-year-old, when you couldn’t grasp the concept of him not also being your dad. he was there for your birth, your childhood, your embarrassing teens and now even for your 20th birthday.
you don’t exactly know when the thing happened though.
one day, you were all a big, happy family and the next you suddenly realized, how attractive zeke yeager really was. maybe, it was the way you noticed that he was so much more athletic and broader than your father as they walked around your pool in their swimming trunks on a hot summer day. maybe, it was the way you suddenly became aware of how tall he really was, when you tried to reach a cup on a shelf too high, only to feel his presence directly behind you with his chest against your back as he reached his arm above your head and grabbed the cup, only to hand it to you with a teasing ‘you should really try this thing called growing. i heard it does wonders against high shelfs.’ or maybe, it was the way you finally registered how his gray eyes shamelessly checked you out as you walked around in your flimsy crop tops and shorts, barely covering anything.
it was so wrong, but that didn’t mean you would stop your little teasing. your dresses got shorter and shorter, dropping your keys on purpose on the way out just to flash him your lacy panties. hugging him longer than usual as he was leaving, just to press your breasts up against his hard chest. you wanted him to know you weren’t a little girl anymore. you wanted his mind to be filled with lewd thoughts about you. only you.
even when you left for college, you couldn’t stop thinking about the blond man, especially when you were in your bed late at night, with your hand stuffed in your panties and your mouth whimpering his name into the pillow. images of him, with his hard cock in a large palm, pleasuring himself with you on his mind, groaning your name, always brought you to an orgasm, but it wasn’t enough. you knew the only way to quench your need for this man was by having him, no matter how rotten your desire was.
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at last, it was finally your birthday, and you couldn’t wait to get home and act upon your ploy to seduce zeke yeager. it was a foolproof plan really. nobody would even suspect you were trying to rile your favorite uncle up, and he would only react, if he wanted you just as much. what better gift for your birthday, than ultimately having the forbidden fruit you’ve been trying to deny yourself of for so long.
“happy birthday, angel!”, your family exclaimed excitedly as you came downstairs. you quickly scanned the room to see uncle zeke already sitting in his usual spot on an armchair in the corner of the living room, getting up and joining your parents at the bottom of the stairs when he noticed your presence.
knowing that he was there, you finally smiled happily, thanking them softly before being pulled into a tight embrace by zeke. “yeah, happy birthday, angel”, he lowly murmured into your ear as he pressed you firmly against him, goosebumps erupting at his slightly suggestive tone.
“thank you, uncle zuzu”, you whispered back, squeezing him tight, hoping to get the message across that you were more than happy to be in his arms.
alas, you were forced to part as your mother shoved him to the side to embrace you, your dad jokingly complaining about you going for a hug with your favorite first instead of your parents, in the background.
“well, i can’t help that i’m so much cooler to her than you”, zeke retorted playfully, earning him a light-hearted punch to the arm from your father.
the rest of the day felt like an eternity. it’s not that you didn’t enjoy spending time with your parents, especially if zeke was there, but the prospect of getting the blond male to act upon your, hopefully, mutual desires, had you looking at the clock more times than you would like to admit.
“are you waiting for something?”
you quickly snapped out of your daydreams of what could happen later, as the man with the main role in them sat down closely beside you, your thighs brushing against each other. you couldn’t help your gaze lingering where your skin touched before blinking up at him through your lashes, only to see him grinning down at you, clearly amused by your stare. time for the first part of the mission.
“oh yeah, i’ll be going clubbing with a few friends later.”
“clubbing?”, zeke pressed with a frown, “and your parents are letting you?”
zeke has always been very overprotective of you. your dad joked that it’s because you’re basically like his daughter, but you hoped it was more than that. that’s why you were counting on his overprotectiveness to eventually lead you to the desired outcome of the day aka you, stuffed full of his cum.
“mmm, yeah. it’s my 20th birthday uncle zeke, not my 10th, you know. i’m an adult”, you retorted provocatively before getting up. “’m gonna go get ready.”
you could swear you felt his irritated glare burn into your back as you made your way upstairs, grinning at the first bit of your plan succeeding.
the second step, was your appearance. just a week before that, you went shopping for the shortest dress you could find, ready to turn heads, or specifically, one head. shower, hair, makeup, baby pink lace underwear, see-through tights, black dress. you haven’t felt this hot and confident in a while with college forcing you to wear hoodies and sweatpants all day every day. no way in hell were you going to make yourself suffer through endless lectures in cute skirts and dresses.
five minutes before your friends came, one of your essential male friends included, you decided to head downstairs to make sure zeke had enough time to admire how hot you looked.
as you came downstairs, you could hear your dad exclaiming ‘look at my beautiful girl, all grown up’, making zeke turn around. goosebumps erupted as you felt his eyes slowly trail along your figure, your skin tingling where his gaze burned into your exposed skin.
you did a full spin, showing off your outfit to the three people in your living room, but only caring about the opinion of one. to your disappointment, you didn’t quite get the reaction you wanted, with zeke turning back around to your mother, continuing to talk about whatever.
no matter how much you hated it, you couldn’t stop the jealousy crawling up your tightening throat, making you sick with disgust. you knew your mother was just as much as a friend to the man of your desires as your father, but it didn’t stop you from feeling this way. you wanted his eyes on you and not some other woman, even if that woman was your own mother.
as if on cue, the doorbell rang out, your mood immediately lifting at the chance that the third step of your plan finally elicits a much-craved reaction from zeke.
you opened the door, your best friends immediately throwing themselves at you, screaming their congratulations and complimenting your attire. just like you hoped, the boy you’ve been friends with and flirted with since high school, jean kirstein, was the last one to congratulate you. he hugged you tight, leaning down, whispering a low ‘happy birthday, pretty girl. you look good enough to eat’, at the same time as your parents and zeke came into the foyer.
the hug you shared with jean lasted just a tad too long for it to count as appropriate, with you giggling excessively at his comment just to be sure that zeke heard it. and as you parted to say goodbye to your family, your flirty friend kept his strong arm around your waist, as though it belonged there.
you don’t miss the way zeke glared at jean’s arm around you or the way he had the slightest frown on his face as he told you to ‘have fun and be careful’, but when you turned around and left the house to get into jean’s car, disappointment filled you when you realized that the blond male didn’t do anything to keep you from going. all this planning and finger crossing for nothing. ‘happy fucking birthday to me’, you bitterly thought, as you drove off into the night, mood already completely ruined.
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after hours of trying to enjoy the end of your birthday even for a bit, you finally had enough. jean took you home, trying to make out with you on the backseat of his car in the parking lot, but as tempting as the idea of letting him fuck zeke yeager out of your mind sounded, you couldn’t bring yourself to. the fact that today was supposed to be the day you got your dad’s best friend right where you wanted him, was enough to make you crave a nice shower and your warm bed. you couldn’t wait for this day to end.
when jean pulled up to your house, you parted ways with a quick kiss and a cheeky promise of tomorrow, before making your way into the house. it was already 3 a.m., so you were sure everybody was already asleep, as you quietly made your way inside.
“there you are. welcome back, pretty girl.”
at hearing zeke’s raspy voice out of nowhere, you flinched and let out an unvoluntary squeak. what was he doing here?
you brought your hand to your heart, feeling it hammer against your chest, your eyes snapping to the spot your dad’s best friend was sitting in, in the kitchen. “uncle zeke! you scared me, what are you still doing here?”
as you made your way into the kitchen, you finally noticed the empty tequila bottle on the table and your unconscious father, snoring on the coach in the living room, just a few feet away.
“mmm, wanted to make sure you come home safely after your dad passed out, so i waited for you”, he casually retorted while his grey eyes inspected you from head to toe. smeared lipstick, a light sheen of sweat on your skin and your dress hiked up dangerously high on your thighs.
feeling small under his calculating gaze, you once again looked at your sleeping dad and gestured towards the bottle. “guess you also had a wild party going on?”
“mh, your dad’s just a lightweight.”
the air inside the kitchen was heavy and suffocating. you knew something was wrong with the way zeke wouldn’t stop staring at you and only answered with short sentences, his usual playful chattiness nowhere to be seen.
trying to get rid of the awkwardness and your nervousness, you asked: “where- uh, where’s mom?”
“asleep”, was the short answer you got, making you even more uneasy than before. “oh, w-well. i’m gonna go and also hit the hay. thanks for staying up for me uncle zeke, good night.”
“stop.”
this one word made you halt in your tracks just as you were about to turn around, making you look questioningly back at him. what you didn’t expect however, was to see zeke yeager spread his thighs and pet one of them with a simple ‘sit down, angel.” somehow, the pet name sounded condescending as it left his lips, but that didn’t stop your pussy from clenching at the sight of him with his legs wide open, looking positively inviting like never before.
your gaze quickly flickered towards the unconscious figure in the armchair, but even that couldn’t stop you when uncle zeke was offering you to sit on his lap, like you dreamed of for so long.
your legs slowly took you towards the spot he was sitting in, only for him to pull you on one of his thighs as soon as you were in his reach. his arm wrapped tightly around your waist, while the other found its place on your thigh, your heartrate skyrocketing at the close proximity.
not really knowing what to do with your hands and where to look, you once again brought your gaze to your dad in the living room, having the perfect view of him from your position on zeke’s lap, your fingers interlocked in your own lap as to not touch him too much.
“how was the party?”, he questioned seemingly nonchalant, but his tone had a certain edge to it, that made you feel as if you were being scolded.
you chuckled nervously, keeping your eyes locked on your unconscious father, as you started uttering: “oh, uh… it was- “
only to have zeke’s palm grab your cheeks, squeezing them together in a pout, as he turned your head towards him, forcing you to focus your gaze on him.
“did you fuck him?”
zeke was watching your expression closely when he practically growled the question, taking note of how your eyes widened, your breath deepened, and your thighs automatically pressed together as the meaning of his imposing words settled in.
the jealousy could practically be grabbed as it rolled off the blond male in waves and you knew, that if you wanted your birthday wish to come true, you had to play the part of the innocent and unsuspecting little girl.
“wha-? no!”, you exclaimed supposedly offended and distraught that he would even ask such a thing, as best as you could with your lips pressed together in a pout by his large palm.
the man’s dark grey – were they always this dark? – eyes narrowed as you seamlessly pretended to not know what he was hinting at, but the way you immodestly battered your eyelashes at him, one hand finding it’s way onto the palm that was squeezing your plush thigh, showed him at you weren’t as oblivious as you feigned to be.
“no, huh?”, he chuckled darkly, his hand leaving your face to push you down onto your knees between his legs instead, “then you’re not against helping your dear uncle with a certain issue, or are you baby?”
stammering out a little confused ‘what?’, you quickly checked whether your dad was still asleep, only for yeager’s palm to return to its place on your cheeks, squeezing them once again as he yanked your head back towards him. “don’t act like a brainless, useless slut, angel. it really doesn’t suit you. you’re my smart little girl, aren’t you?”
the sickly-sweet tone he used worked like a charm on your praise-starved brain. you wanted to please him and be his good girl, no matter what it took.
looking up at him with big, wide eyes, a drop of drool fell from your pouty lips onto his jean-clad crotch when he tightened his hold on your cheeks as you nodded like an obedient little toy, making him smile proudly.
“that’s my girl. now,”, he declared, unbothered by the tiny wetness seeping into his pants, his veiny hands made quick work of his belt and zipper, “show me how much you want to help your uncle zeke.”
just the sight of him whipping out his hard cock out of the confinements of his jeans and boxers, was enough to make a small pool of wetness gush out of your cunt, not that it mattered anyway. your lacy panties were already long soaked just from sitting on his lap.
zeke’s cock was longer and definitely thicker than you could’ve ever imagined, bigger than any you’ve ever taken with a prominent vein running on the underside, the tip flushed in a pretty pink. the saliva collecting in your mouth at the prospect of having him down your throat soon made you swallow hard, while you waited for his next instructions, not wanting to disappoint him by acting impulsively.
seeing his best friends’ daughter so submissive and eager-to-please on her knees between his legs as said best friend laid, passed out, just a few feet away, made zeke’s cock twitch. he knew it was sick and wrong, but he has always been a weak man when it came to you.
“go ahead, sweetheart. make uncle zeke feel good.”
at his permission to go, you nearly lunched forward, your pretty lips coated in sticky lipgloss instantly wrapping around the sensitive tip of his dick, making him groan deeply somewhere in the back of his throat.
you alternated between swirling your tongue around his cockhead and slowly sucking, as zeke put a cigarette between his lips, lightning it. normally, you hated the foul smell of nicotine and complained numerous times about how much you hated smokers but… the sight of it dangling between his thick fingers, as his other hand lost itself inside your hair, guiding your head to bob up and down on his length, awakened something deep in you, that you didn’t even know existed.
it didn’t help that while every other person reeking of smoke repulsed you, the same scent clinging to zeke brought you a sense of comfort. the fact that he also looked hot as fuck doing it, certainly didn’t hurt.
above you, the tall man made sure to let his eyes wander to your father from time to time, mostly keeping them locked on your lewd expression and your full lips wrapped around his cock though. he knew that the man a few feet away was a heavy sleeper, especially when drunk, so he wasn’t afraid of letting you know just how pleased he was with you.
“that’s a good girl. doing so good for me, want me to cum down your throat, sweetheart?”  
you mumbled a small ‘please’ around his cock, causing him to groan huskily as your vocal cords vibrated against his sensitive tip. knowing he was almost there, you hallowed your cheeks and tightened your throat, wanting him to lose himself in the inviting warmth of your mouth.
as soon as zeke felt himself teetering at the edge, he couldn’t stop himself from quickly putting out the cig in his hand and holding your head still with his large palms as he started frantically thrusting up in your mouth. having zeke use you to chase his own high made you clench around nothing as you gagged around his length, doing your best to try and keep your jaw slack just so you could hear the man praising you again.
at the feeling of you choking on his cock, zeke’s head fell back as he moaned hoarsely, the sound going straight to the fire in the pit of your stomach already forming just from sucking him off and hearing his erotic grunts.
on the next thrust inside your warm, wet mouth, zeke emptied himself in the back of your throat with a low growl of ‘good fucking girl’, making you whine around his dick. the blond pulled you off as you started coughing, instructing you to ‘swallow, angel.’ being the whipped, little toy you did as you were told, looking up at him as you licked the remaining cum of your spit covered lips.
zeke smirked at your sensual display, whilst he stood up, pulling you up to your feet, only to push you against the dinner table and impatiently smash his lips against yours.
you had half the mind to think about how he didn’t even seem to care that his sticky cum still lingered in your mouth as he kissed you before your brain completely shut down because you were making out with zeke yeager.
strong palms wandered up your thighs under your short dress, cupping your ass while the flimsy fabric rode up as a consequence of his wandering hands. the display of strength as he easily lifted you up on the hard surface behind you, made your head spin. everything this man was doing had you weak in the knees and if you weren’t already seated, you were convinced your legs would’ve given out underneath you.
as yeager made room for himself between your thighs, spreading them in the process, your arms found their place around his broad shoulders, pulling him down even closer towards you as you tasted the whiskey and smoke on his slightly chapped lips. you could hear his soft chuckle at the displeased whimper you let out when he removed himself from you, before tracing his thumb faintly over your clothed clit. just that slightest contact with your puffy bundle of nerves had your hips twitching up, your face heating up at the obvious display of his effect on you.
“aww, is my slutty little baby desperate for her favorite uncle?”, he asked in mock empathy, ripping your tights like it was nothing, before his eyes soaked up the sight of your baby pink lace panties completely ruined by your slick.
“i see you were ready for something to happen today. were you hoping the little boy from earlier would fuck you?”, he almost snarled the question, before adding: “or were you hoping for me, bunny? are these pretty panties just for me?”
as your core gushed out more of your juices at the pet name, you obediently shook your head at his accusation of you dressing up for jean, mewling out: “y-you, daddy. only you.”
zeke closed his eyes to compose himself when his cock twitched alive once again at the sweet melody of you calling him daddy. he knew this was the point of no return. he could’ve stopped this before, he was sure of that, but not anymore. not when you oh so sweetly called out for your daddy to take care of you.
in one swift motion, your panties were gone and thrown into a dark corner of the kitchen, the only light illuminating the space coming from the turned-on lamp in the foyer from when you came home. forcing you to recline back as zeke lifted your legs up on his muscular shoulders, you shuddered as his hot breath hit your drenched pussy.
after just one kitten lick to your core, you heard zeke’s pleased hum, mumbling something along the lines of ‘just as sweet as you, bunny’, but you couldn’t tell for sure because the very next second he was diving tongue first into you, sucking, licking, and slurping like it’s his last meal. the moan that left you at his intense ministrations was downright pornographic and you could only clench around nothing as his large palm came up to silence you.
“as much as i’d love to listen to your cries, sweet thing, gonna wake your parents up if you keep at it”, he muttered against your sensitive clit, the vibrations only making you mewl against his hand.
your hands tried to find purchase somewhere, the hard surface of the table, your plush thighs, before your nails finally got a grasp of his blond locks, using the leverage as an advantage to push his face even further into your slick cunt.
the obscene, wet sounds that echoed in the room were making your face heat up, but the embarrassment didn’t stop you from grinding desperately against his tongue, his thick beard rubbing painfully but oh so deliciously against the delicate skin of your inner thighs.
when you felt two of his thick fingers probe at your entrance before pushing in, instantly hitting that one spot inside you, you threw your head back as your eyes rolled into the back of your head, thighs trembling against his head as you reached your peak around his digits. your back arched off the wooden table, thighs snugly pressing against the sides of his head, almost suffocating him in the process, while you moaned a long, high-pitched ‘daddy’ against his palm.
zeke yeager could proudly say that he’s had his fair share of women, but the sight of you, succumbing to the pleasure he was providing you with, was by far the most erotic he had the privilege of witnessing. the mix of your cross-eyed expression, your sloppy cunt clenching impossibly around his thick fingers and your body twitching from the aftershocks of your orgasm, only fueled his desire to see you go dumb on his fat cock.
a hard slap against the fat of your right thigh caused you to squeal, your legs sliding down from his shoulders, completely limp from all the spent energy. zeke leaned down, once again capturing your lips in a heated make out. his warm tongue still had the distinct taste of your release on it as it slipped between your lips, his full beard soaked in your juices scratching against your cheeks and chin, but you certainly didn’t mind as long as you could have him between your legs, mouths interlocked.
“wanna see your cute lil’ ass while i wreck you, bunny. can you turn around for daddy?”, he questioned, voice raspy, but he didn’t actually wait for an answer, grabbing your hips in a bruising grip and flipping you over on your stomach, ass pressed up against his crotch already. not being able to control yourself at another clear display that his muscles weren’t just for show, your hips automatically grinded back against his painfully hard cock.
another strong blow was delivered, this time to your bouncy behind, your small mewl echoing in the large space. “slutty, desperate whores aren’t appreciated here, bunny. thought you were daddy’s good, little girl? guess daddy was wrong about you”, zeke sighed in faux disappointment, knowing you would do anything for him to keep praising you.
“n-no! am your good, little girl! ‘m sorry, daddy, please don’t leave”, you practically sobbed out, to drunk on his touch to realize the manipulative undertone in his phrasing.
smirking victoriously, the blond tenderly smoothed his huge palm, with his fingers covered in your already dried up essences, over your ass check, his fat tip nudging against your soaked entrance, whilst he shh-ed you, promising that he’s ‘not gonna leave you bunny, ‘m all yours.’
at the promise of him belonging to you, your eyes rolled into the back of your head, just as yeager decided to push his aching dick into your tight pussy. at the first bump against your gummy walls, you both knew no one would ever be able to compare. it was a tight fit as he continued to push past the resistance of your cunt, hissing at the continuous contractions around his sensitive cock. no way in hell, he thought to himself as he already had to hold himself back from cumming as if he were some virgin all over again.
when he finally bottomed out, his patience was close to non-existent, so without waiting for you to adjust, he started thrusting in you like a mad man. your hands flew out to grab the other edge of the wooden surface to have some kind of support, as his powerful thrusts made the whole table shake and drag across the tiled floor.
“’s too much, daddy! slow down!”, you wailed, knowing full well that this was exactly what you waited for all this time. the dark chuckle that left his panting and grunting mouth told you that he was also very aware of the fact that you didn’t actually want him to slow down, so the only reaction you got, besides his acknowledging chuckle, were his thrusts picking up in speed.
after another strong hit to your jiggling ass and a groan that sounded suspiciously like ‘such a perfect ass’, zeke leaned over you, completely covering you with his large frame. his hand found its way to your front, giving your tits a quick squeeze through your dress, before continuing its journey up, finally settling around your neck.
as it constricted around your neck, thick fingers expertly pressing against the pressure points, restricting the air flow oh so deliciously, your spit-covered lips fell open in a silent ‘o’, the act lurching you impossibly closer to your orgasm. at this point, the only coherent words you were able to formulate were ‘yes’, ‘daddy’ and ‘please’, causing the tall man’s chest to fill with pride at your dumbed out state.
“my cute, submissive, little bunny. have i fucked you stupid with my cock?”, he teased, only to get his confirmation by the lack of response on your side, too far gone to process that he asked a question.
the rhythmic clenching of your warm core reminded him that his dick was practically begging him to let it stuff you full of his sticky cum, so as his grip on your throat and hip tightened even more, he let his carnal desires take over as he rutted impossibly faster inside you.
every thrust caused his fat tip to poke harshly against your cervix, the feeling of pain only fueling your pleasure, as you silently took all your favorite uncle was giving you. somewhere in the back of your mind the thought of your father sleeping just in the next room flew around, but it quickly got fucked back out by zeke’s fat cock.
at the next rough plunge inside your warm walls and the low growl of ‘cum on daddy’s fucking cock, bunny’ directly beside your ear, you came undone with a loud moan of his name. you were pretty sure the force of your orgasm made you blackout for a second, because the next time you came to your senses, zeke was shooting his load inside your inviting cunt directly at your cervix, your name leaving his lips like a prayer.
you were exhausted. your whole body shook and twitched, your stomach hurt from being pressed against the edge of the dinner table for so long, sweat dripping down on the surface from your face and neck.
suddenly the room was way too quiet, safe for the heavy breathing and your occasional whimpers. slowly, zeke pulled out, only to spread your cheeks apart to take a good luck at your abused pussy pushing out his white cum. it slowly trickled down your legs, mixing with your leaked juices on the tiles beneath your feet.
not having the energy to move, you let the blond male pull down your dress back over your ass, listening to the rustle of fabric and belt clicking as he got dressed again. just as he gently helped you stand-up again, you could hear a yawn coming from the doorway that led to the living room.
“what’re you both doing?”, your half-awake father asked as he made his way through the kitchen past you to get to the foyer. your nails dug into zeke’s muscular forearms as the panic of getting caught formed in the pit of your stomach, only to hear the older man murmur a casual, seemingly sleepy ‘she just got home, gonna go sleep now’, as though he wasn’t blowing out your back just a few minutes prior.
with an unsuspecting ‘’aight, night you two’, your dad disappeared in the shared bedroom with your sleeping mother.
“fuck”, you breathed out, stressed at almost being caught and your legs buckling, only for zeke’s strong arms to hold you up right.
“hey, look at me, angel”, the male softly demanded, gaze tender as your eyes met his. “i’ll bring you to bed and clean up here, okay? don’t worry about a thing.”
a sleepy, but happy smile stretched itself across your lips at him caring for you so deeply.
“open your mouth, sweetheart.”
without second-guessing the request, you obediently opened your mouth, only to feel his saliva hit your outstretched tongue. the taste made you mewl needily as you realized what it all meant. you were his and he was yours.
zeke chuckled, amused by your blissed out expression, before pecking your lips, picking you up and caring you to your room with you mumbling a satisfied ‘best birthday ever’ against his neck.
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ateezmakemeweep · 3 years
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playing with fire (part 1)
word count: 23k
fluff, smut (warning: age gap, infidelity, roommate’s father)
(series masterlist)
“is there any other way you could pay?” the woman behind the desk asked, stout and soft spoken with sympathy in her eyes.
she probably has to have this conversation with students a lot, tell them that their tuition payment didn’t go through or that they’re not eligible for government support.
or that the athletics department needed more scholarship money, successfully rendering you, one of the many photography majors on campus, unable to pay for your last semester of college.
“a loan of some sort or another scholarship, maybe?” she tried to help, “i could send over an e-mail of ones you might be eligible for.”
you swallow the lump forming in your throat, attempting to calm all the anxiety and stress violently making its way through your body.
“y-yes, that would be great, thank you,” you barely manage to get out, hoping and praying to some unknown force above that you don’t burst into tears.
you were nearing the end of the fall semester, the last fall semester you ever anticipated of having, when you found out just last week that you were no longer eligible for your scholarship.
in a short, curt e-mail explaining that, while you kept up your gpa and never strayed from the requirements, they’ve maxed out their amount of funding and are looking to use that money elsewhere.
“can they do that!?” your best friend and roommate of four years yelps, gucci sunglasses atop her head as she stomps around your shared, off-campus apartment.
“they can’t seriously do that! you’ve been a straight a student since you started and now they wanna take it away?! before your last semester of senior year?!”
“eunbi, it’s not ideal but i’ve already come to terms with it,” you explain gently, leaving out the part where you did, in fact, have a break down right outside the bursar office only an hour ago. “i’ll just save up money and come back in the fall to finish.”
“that’s so not right or fair though!” she whines, something about the concept of not getting what she wants unfamiliar to your roommate.
you first met park eunbi during freshmen move in day, your two raggedy luggages and beat up backpacks an embarrassing contrast to the multiple louis vuitton travel bags she lunged in.
you were intimidated for all of three seconds, before she looked at you with a smile and threw her arms around you like a long lost best friend.
it was obvious she came from money, the way she spoke and carried herself so confidently before her parents came in and introduced themselves.
they were both gorgeous and tall and looked far too young to have an 18-year-old daughter, covered in fancy jewelry and expensive looking clothing.
her dad, who introduced himself as mr. park seonghwa, didn’t seem to bat an eye at your more humble appearance. he reminded you a lot of eunbi, honest and genuine in the way he was kind and nonjudgemental.
mrs. park seemed nice enough, too, though you could see the judgement behind her pretty eyes.
the way she sneered at your bags and looked down at your hands, so different from her and her daughter’s not covered in diamond bracelets or acrylic nails.
“did we just miss your parents?” she asked, her voice just as pretty and rich sounding as she appeared; you bet if she laughed, she’d had have that melodic, care-free laugh all rich women seem to have.
“oh, uh, yeah, i’m sorry,” you apologized, lying through your teeth with a shy smile and averting gaze - you had to move in by yourself, the same way you traveled here all alone with no one to send you off.
“it’s okay, we just thought it’d be nice to meet them,” eunbi’s father interjects, the smile on his handsome face causing your stomach to swoop - how is he a dad?
“we were gonna take eunbi to an early dinner before we left. do you wanna join us?”
“oh no, it’s okay, i’d hate to intru-”
“no, you’re coming, c’mon!” your new roommate whined, grabbing your hand and pulling you toward the door. “we’ll be able to get a lot of dessert out of them. probably the whole menu if we wanted.”
and you saw that over the years, eunbi knew she could, in fact, get whatever she wanted from her parents. they had the money and the means and the fondness in their hearts for their only daughter.
but it never seemed to get to your friend.
she was always kind and thoughtful of others and never said or did anything to suggest she was just a brainless, spoiled rich kid.
even in your guy’s second year when she found out you were going to school on an academic scholarship, she didn’t care. she didn’t turn her nose up or think you were lesser than her for not having the funds; if anything, it only made her praise you more.
that you were smart and ambitious enough to work under the strict guidelines of a prestigious scholarship.
“i know it’s not fair,” you mumble, not wanting to cry or have another anxiety attack over this matter. “but it is what it is. i’ll figure it out.”
she lets out a dejected, defeated sigh so uncharacteristic of the girl, plopping down on her pink, fluffy bed and bringing you down with her.
“we’ll sell feet pics over winter break,” she concludes after a few minutes of silence, wrapping her arm around yours and curling her body into yours. “you know how much money we can get from that? and we have pretty feet,” she says, sticking her leg up and wiggling her red, painted toes.
there’s a little less tightness in your chest and a little heaviness lifted in your stomach as you let out a giggle, looking over at your best friend who truly got you through the last four years of school.
you really don’t know how you’d still be functioning if it weren’t for her.
“you’re sick.”
“i’m serious,” she giggles out, flipping on her side and causing the bed to bounce under you. “you’re still good with coming tomorrow, right? i told my parents you were.”
she had invited you to her house for the winter break this year, the girl not wanting you to spend a month alone in the apartment.
you’ve shared with her how strained your relationship with your parents has been, really, since birth. never seeing eye to eye to them and feeling as if they never had your best interests at heart.
when most kids get full ride scholarships, their parents are immensely proud. bragging about how smart they are and telling them how proud they were.
but your parents were the opposite.
they didn’t want you to up and leave them to pursue an education. they thought you were gonna stay with them forever, not go to college like them and help run the family business back home in your tiny little hometown.
it was your dream to go to college and get a degree, though, so that’s exactly what you did for yourself; but they saw it as a giant fuck you.
saw it as you thinking you were better than them and basically told you to never come back if you thought you were so much smarter and better off without them.
so you’d spent every winter or summer vacation in the dorms, this year finally being the time you accepted eunbi’s invitation to stay over - reluctantly.
“i packed all my stuff, yeah,” you mumble, hands twisted into one another nervously. “but... are you sure they’re okay with it? i don’t wanna intrude or be there if i’m not wanted.”
“y/n, please,” she whines, “my mom may be a raging bitch but you know i make the rules in that house.”
“that’s not what i meant,” you mutter immediately, looking to the girl with a small frown on your lips.
although it was no secret eunbi’s mom didn’t ever seem too fond of you, always sneering at your off-brand items or questioning the logistics of why exactly you needed a scholarship to afford college, you always tried to remain polite.
smile at her and greet her happily even though there was always a thick, palpable tension between you two.
“oh but it is,” she chuckles out, the girl far too aware of what a materialistic snob her mother is. “it’s fine, i know she’s a bitch. my dad’s just coming tomorrow anyway. i told him to bring one of the bigger cars so we can lay out in the back.”
you have to bite back a snarky comment about the fact there are multiple cars in question, though the look in your eye certainly gives it away. she can only giggle and shrug her shoulders, flopping onto her back as she tells you about how excited she is to be reunited with her boyfriend.
eunbi and jiwoon have been dating since their second year of high school, going to colleges only an hour away from each other; he was just as handsome as he was kind and good to her, leaving you with no other option but to love and support the both of them.
and you try to listen to her rambling that ensues, you really do, but your mind is swirling with some slight anxiety about staying with her family for a month.
you don’t wanna make her mom even more irritated, deal with the side eyes and passive aggressive comments and overall feeling of just not being wanted.
you don’t want eunbi to feel obligated to be with you 24/7, act as a cock block to her and her boyfriend who haven’t seen each other in almost six weeks.
and maybe, you don’t want your tiny, small, miniscule crush on mr. park to make you feel any more awkward than it does, wondering how a married man who has a daughter in college is still so handsome and alluring.
it also doesn’t help that he’s just so incredibly kind, always making everyone feel so comfortable and welcomed, it’d be hard not to just develop a little, secret crush on him.
“eunbi, who is that sexy ass man who just dropped you off?” one of your suite mates asks your roommate, everyone gathering back in front of the dorm building after winter break.
it was sophomore year and you spent a month in the quiet, almost eerie college dorms alone (apart from the ra down the hall). you were grateful for everyone to return, no matter how loud or catty things were about to become.
“yeah, for real. is that your new boyfriend? he’s hotter than the last one and i didn’t even think that was possible.”
“uhhh.. no,” eunbi says, shooting the crowd of girls with lustful eyes and curious glances a look of distaste. “that’s my dad.”
and that’s when a chorus of disbelief and inappropriate comments erupted from the group of college girls.
asking how a dad could look like that while hoping and praying he’s single.
inquiring about just how much her dad’s on campus and when’s the next time he’s gonna pick her up.
about how he’s definitely hotter than her boyfriend, with a more mature and sophisticated look than these college boys.
“are they fucking serious! like how disgusting? he’s my literal father!” eunbi rages once in the dorm room, sharing a few curse words and vulgar phrases at the girl’s before stomping away from them.
“and for them to say that shit in front of me? did they think i want to hear that?”
“i know, that was so sick,” you agree, because even though you, too, think he’s attractive, it’s not something you would ever verbalize to your friend.
“like... i know he’s younger than most dads, my parents had me when they were teenagers, but shit! how sick,” she rants, throwing down her heavy designer bags and flopping on her bed.
you can tell by the look on her face how much it truly bothers her, everyone always noticing her dad and making comments like that. she handles it well, she’s always able to handle herself well, but it doesn’t take away from the fact that it’s something that worries her.
people getting close to her to get to her dad, even if it was teachers or other moms in elementary school or her friends when she got to college.
it’s one of the many reasons you would never give away your little crush on him - because it’s not only inappropriate and uncomfortable for her to know but there’s also no need to tell her.
because it’s not like it would go anywhere.
he’s a married man and your roommate’s father, a twisted, dark, forbidden fantasy that will stay in the walls of your head and never see the light of day - no matter how thrilling and fulfilling being with him would be.
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“eunbi, your dad’s gonna be here soon,” you yell into your roommate’s doorway, met with the sound of her groaned “five more minutes!” that you’ve been hearing for the past twenty.
she was on facetime with jiwoon when you went to bed around one, briefly waking to the sound of her girlish screams or high-pitched giggles three hours later; you wouldn’t be surprised if she only went to bed a few hours ago.
“you said five more minutes thirty minutes ago,” you say, stomping your way over before smacking her over the head with a pillow. she lets out a loud sigh before swatting you away, your surprisingly fast reflexes grabbing her wrist.
she peeks one eye open as a smirk covers her morning face, looking from you all dressed up and ready in your pink pleated skirt and white thigh high stockings, down to her wrist in your hold.
“that was kinda hot. and you look good. i don’t know how to act right now.”
“shut up and get your ass out of bed,” you demand, biting back a smile as you storm out of her room.
you’d been pacing around the apartment ever since you woke up at seven a.m., more and more unsettled about staying over her house as the time drew closer.
you checked to make sure you had enough clothes and chargers and skincare products for nearly an hour, finally settling the same purple suitcase you moved in with freshmen year near the door.
you hope mrs. park doesn’t notice, remembering the way she sneered at the wonky zipper and slightly stained bottom.
you also hope you can keep yourself in check, not get too nervous or flustered by eunbi’s exorbitant wealth or a new setting you don’t feel welcomed in or her hot ass father whose bones you wanna jump.
the knock at the door completely sobers you, jumping in your spot just in time to see eunbi fly across the living room to get to the door. there’s a big, happy smile on her face, ripping open the door and greeting her father in typical eunbi fashion.
“are those for me?” she asks, snatching the red box from his hands.
excitement bubbles inside the girl as she unveils twelve chocolate covered strawberries, a speciality at one of the local dessert shops just a few miles from her home.
“you shouldn’t have, dad, really. i’m much too tired to appreciate this.”
the man can only look at his daughter with a look of disdain and affection, waking up to an extremely passive aggressive text that she’d really appreciate an early morning treat from her favorite place ever and that it’d really inspire her to be ready.
but as he can currently see, given the state of her hair and pajamas pants, it didn’t at all act as a motivator.
“then maybe i should just-” but upon her father’s hand reaching out to grab the box of strawberries, the girl brings it to her body and runs away, yelling that her bags are packed and she’s just gonna wash her face.
he looks to you with a mock annoyed expression, your heart jumping in your chest as you send him a small, polite smile.
“how do you deal with her, y/n?” he asks, a smirk on his face rising as you let out a soft, slightly forced giggle - this man looks too good for his own good at ten o’clock in the morning.
“don’t talk shit about me!” she yelps before you can even think to say something, a smile lighting up his face again before he nods his head down the hall.
“i’ll bring down your girl’s bags,” he says, his tall, large frame coming toward you making your knees feel slightly wobbly.
you swear you see his eyes roam over you for the shortest of seconds, down to your shirt and exposed legs before back to your face, until he’s looking into your eyes questioningly.
totally not like someone who just checked out their daughter’s roommate - this is what you feared, your own delusionals and attraction making your crazy little brain see something that’s not there.
“her bedroom’s down that hall?”
you resist the urge to swallow nervously, begging yourself to snap out of it and remind yourself you have to deal with the man for a month. a month of his dark, piercing eyes and bright, white smile and skin so smooth and clear, it’s far too easy to forget he’s almost forty years old.
“yeah,” you barely manage to get out. “i-i can help and bring down mine.”
“no, it’s okay,” he insists, “help in getting eunbi ready. you know she’ll delay us thirty more minutes.”
you let out another strained chuckle as you nod your head, finally letting out the breath you’ve been holding when you hear his footsteps disappear down the hall and into her room.
as long as you distance yourself from him, not look him in the eye or let any sort of idea get in your head that an older, married man could want you back, this will be fine.
it’ll be a nice, calm, relaxed break actually full of interaction and socialization opposed to your usual lonely bubble of solitude.
eunbi’s not making that very easy though, when twenty minutes later, she’s opening the back door of her father’s black g-wagen and sprawling out on the black leather seats.
“where’s y/n supposed to go, eunbi?” seonghwa asked, the fatherly tone is his voice causing eunbi to let out a huff; the only time you see eunbi’s spoiled tendencies come out is around her father, the girl knowing he’ll do anything and everything for her.
and apparently, so will you.
sitting in the front seat of her car, next to her extremely hot father you’re trying to stay calm around, while she sleeps soundly in the backseat - if she didn’t invite to stay at her home, meals and bed and transportation free, you’d say she has to owe you.
“was she up all night talking to jiwoon?” mr. park asked, the past few moments of silence just as comforting as they were terrifying. it felt awkward to you, extremely tense and full of suspense, but you knew it was completely normal.
you bite down on your lip, looking back at eunbi sleeping soundly on the seat, even prepared with a fuzzy white blanket. you let out a soft giggle when you see her mouth open, the slightest bit of drool hanging from her mouth and threatening to spill on the dark leather.
“she might’ve been,” you mutter, a breathy laugh leaving her father that causes you to sneak a glance at him.
there’s not a hint of a wrinkle or imperfection on his glowing skin, black hair hanging in his face and red lips quirked into a content smile. that’s something you always noticed about him, despite his dark appearance and looming figure, he always appears to be happy.
smiles and laughs and never gives anyone without his same wealth a dirty glance - he treats everyone the same and that’s another reason you’ve taking a liking to him, not just because he’s the hottest man you’ve ever seen in your life.
“y/n?” he asks, your intrusive thoughts being ripped away at the sound of his voice calling your name.
your eyes move to his and he’s watching you in slight amusement, a rampant blush creeping up on your cheeks at the way you’ve been caught. you’re quick to look away, shake your head and let out an awkward chuckle and apology.
you miss the way his eyes roam your side profile, a delightful smirk and feeling in his chest blooming before he speaks again.
“how was your semester?”
“it was good,” you say, hands placed nervously in your lap. “a lot of work on top of an internship but it was good.”
“and you girls are almost done,” he hums lowly, one hand atop the steering wheel while his eyes focus on the highway in front of him. “eunbi’s been talking about a combined graduation party since the moment you guys met.”
you let out a small laugh as you remember eunbi’s plan since your second semester of freshmen year, ignoring the twinge of sadness in your stomach.
you could’ve never anticipated delaying your college career when you first received your scholarship, happy and proud and eternally grateful for the opportunity.
but you suppose you’re lucky enough to have gotten this far, and delaying one last semester is nothing compared to people who never get to go to college - but it still makes you feel upset.
you think you have the right to feel disappointed and sad, the lingering sick feeling in your stomach making you feel nauseous.
“is it okay if i open the window for a second?” you mumble to mr. park, the man looking over your face.
he presses down on the passenger window button immediately, your face met with cold air as relief floods through your body.
“are you okay? do you get car sick?” he asks, remembering how much eunbi used to get car sick (on the rare occasion she wasn’t passed out during a road trip).
“not usually,” you mumble, resting your head on the side of the door.
then again, i’m not usually freaking out about making tuition money or repressing my violent attraction to my roommate’s father.
seonghwa watches as you close your eyes for a few moment, allowing the cold, windy air to hit your face. he couldn’t help but notice the pinkish tint to your cheeks, suppressing the urge for his eyes and thoughts to wander.
you’re a college girl in the prime of her life and his daughter’s best friend, he’d be a fool to think you were blushing and nervous because of him - but he also doesn’t remember you looking like.... this.
so pretty and dressed up and pink in the face as you check him out with a soft and curious look in your eye.
“maybe try to take a nap,” he suggests, his gaze lingering back onto the road so he doesn’t look at your exposed legs. “i’ll pull off at a rest stop to get you ginger ale.”
“that’s not necessary, mr. park,” your sweet voice says, something about it causing his insides to jump - he definitely doesn’t remember you sounding like that. “i’ll be okay. just need the window open for a little longer.”
you spend the next few minutes with the cold, december wind blowing through the car, your back pressed against the comfortable seat behind you. a chill runs through your body, goosebumps rising on your exposed thighs, but it feels better than the alternative.
potentially panicking or vomiting due to current stress of your life.
your gaze shifts to the man beside you, whether it be to check him out or ask if he’s cold unknown to you.
“are you okay with the-”
the words are stuck in your throat when you see his eyes aren’t on the road but your exposed, goose-bumpy thighs, the white lace of your thigh high stockings and pink skirt leaving little to the imagination.
you wish you could see the look in his eye, if it’s judgemental and shameful or full of lust and curiosity. if he’s wondering what you have on just a few inches under your skirt and if that’s something he even thinks about.
or maybe he’s just looking because it’s there - your skirt blowing in the wind and him caught off guard by the sight right there in his passenger seat.
“um, i think i’m good now,” you mumble, watching from your peripheral as he shifts in his seat and tightens his hold on the steering wheel.
“alright, let me know if you wanna stop.”
you bite down on your lip as you nod your head, keeping your eyes on the view in front of you.
the faint sounds of eunbi snoring behind you act as a way to ground you, remind you that these thoughts and feelings you’re having can’t stay.
maybe you have to get it our of your system now, take all the looks you can and feel all the hopefulness your delusional brain needs until you act as if eunbi’s father is a mean, disgusting, grotesque man.
not someone who gets your heart and body pounding.
you’re not sure how many songs play on the radio until you both are talking again, seonghwa looking in the rearview mirror to see his daughter still passed out on the seats.
“do you think she’ll sleep the whole time?”
he hope for his sake, she doesn’t.
you look back at eunbi sleeping soundly, the drool previously trickling down her mouth successfully making a pool on the black leather.
“probably,” you chuckle out lightly. “i have a feeling she went to bed around six.”
“shit,” he laughs out, remembering the days he used to be able to pull all nighters in college or dreaded the idea of waking up in the morning. “i can’t remember the last time i was able to stay up past one.”
“you’re not even that old, mr. park,” you tease, not sure where you got the balls to say that and feeling, at least for a few seconds, that you overstepped; but then he lets out a deep, amused chuckle and it causes butterflies to erupt in your stomach.
“not that old, huh?” he quips, your tooth sinking into your lip at the tone of his voice. “you know i’m turning 40 in a few months, right?”
you crane your neck to look at the man in the driver’s seat, swallowing thickly when you see his eyes are already on you. there’s a certain type of lightness and teasing in them that you’ve never seen before, the man always happy and jovial but never like this.
never looking so... teasing and playful.
“yeah,” you say with a growing smirk, not being able to help your own nervous excitement. “that doesn’t seem too bad.”
the deep, low chuckle that leaves him causes your stomach to swoop, eyes wide and the small smile on your face causing him to look over you once more.
it’s shameless and bold but neither of you seem to care in that moment.
“i’ll keep that in mind,” he says, deep brown eyes piercing through yours before his face turns teasing and.. appropriate.. “the next time eunbi tries to call me an old man or something.”
“right,” you chuckle out, cheeks burning and heart pounding as you allow yourself to break eye contact.
the ride to eunbi’s house is just over two hours, hoping and praying that it goes by quickly - because you’re not sure how much longer you’ll be able to be alone, or mostly alone, with him.
you’re thinking too much into his words and his gaze and the way he makes you feel, making you silly enough to believe that, maybe, a part of him wants you too.
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the second you arrived at eunbi’s, you had already felt unwelcomed.
not only because of mrs. park, who just about sneered at your presence in her exquisite home, but because of the dozens of other socialites in the immaculately white living room.
it looked and felt almost like a hospital. a white color scheme with black accents, extremely cold and spotless - the only bit of color was in eunbi’s room where it felt like you could actually breathe.
“i’m sorry, i told her not to throw her fucking gathering today,” eunbi complained, grumpy from her nap but still happy to finally be home.
“a bunch of stuck up snobs, i swear to god. they either have to get the stick lodged so far up their asshole removed or get dicked down by their lousy excuses of-”
“eunbi,” you hear her father’s deep voice reprimand, the girl not even feeling the slightest bit of shame or embarrassment for talking that way in front of her father.
“oh, c’mon, dad, you know it’s true!” she whines in a whispered tone. “they’re the worst! and she knew me and y/n were coming today, do you really think that wasn’t a coincidence?”
because, as far as eunbi thinks, she has sinking suspicions that her mom did this solely to make you uncomfortable.
she had already been hesitant to let you stay in the first place, had eunbi not gone full on bitch mode and stubbornly proclaimed she’d spend the break with you at the apartment.
but you didn’t have to know that.
“i don’t care, it’ll just be my first christmas without my family, mom, who cares about that,” she had said, all types of manipulative and toxic behavior that she learned from the best.
she’s sure her mother was sweet and good at one point in her life, she wouldn’t have ended up with her father in the first place if she wasn’t, but money changes people.
wealth and greed and having the power to get anything you want because you flash a stack of money around or write out a check.
“i told her to have them out by dinner,” he said, his eyes moving from eunbi to you, standing there with tense shoulders and a shy, uncomfortable look on your face.
“you’re more than welcomed here, y/n,” he said, his voice low and full of kindness as he stands in eunbi’s doorway. “don’t worry about it, okay?”
you resist the urge to pout at the touched feeling in your chest, looking from the man to eunbi who’s nodding at her dad’s words.
“thank you, mr. park,” you say, a phrase he swears has never effected him this deeply.
and because of that, he’s quick to haul ass out of there. tells you guys that dinner will be ready around seven and to come down whenever.
you and eunbi spend that time in her room to unpack both of your things and watch movies, her king sized bed nearly lulling you to sleep until her loud squeal and bounce of the bed causes you to jump in shock.
“y/n, don’t be mad at me please,” she whines directly in your face, all wide-eyed and cutesy as she looks at you with mock innocence.
“what did you do?” you mumble tiredly, pushing her away with the smallest of sneers.
“i’ll be back for dinner, i promise, but... is it okay if i go to jiwoon’s for a little?” she asks, cocking her head to the side before shimming closer to you. “i have to get railed so bad.”
“jesus christ, eunbi,” you snort, pushing her away again and burying your face in the pillow - you’ve never met someone who overshares as much as she does.
she plops down on her back with an unabashed giggle, popping right back up like an annoying little dog and looking at you with a smile.
“of course you can go, i’m not gonna hold you hostage here,” you say when she pulls your face away, looking at you so expectantly and sweetly, you couldn’t say no if you wanted.
“okay, but i don’t want you thinking that i’m gonna ditch you this whole time. i’m really not, y/n,” she pouts, knowing that was one of the reasons you were apprehensive about coming - that and her bitch of a mother. “i just miss him.”
a pout falls on your face as you look at eunbi and the genuine look on her face.
“bi, i’m serious, go. i want you to,” you insist, moving a piece of her tangled hair away from her face. “we were just gonna be up here anyway. i’ll probably take a nap, i was about to fall asleep before your loud ass-”
“thank you, thank you, thank you,” she says, pulling you into a tight hug before jumping off her bed and rushing toward her door. “i’ll be back a lot more calm and happy. oh, why, you ask? because i’m about to get my back blown the fuck ou-”
you thank god for your impeccable aim, promptly whacking eunbi in the face with one of her pillows.
“get out of here,” you groan, eunbi throwing the pillow back with a smile on her face.
“sweet dreams, y/n!”
you let out a sigh when she closes her door, falling back onto her bed with a soft plop.
you were definitely tired from your anxious pacing this morning but aren’t sure how much sleep you’re gonna get right now, tonight or for the rest of the month.
knowing that you’re unwelcomed by one person, extremely attracted to another and silently betraying the person you should be most loyal too - but as long as it just stays in your head, and you remind yourself that there’s no way mr. park could feel anything back to you, it’ll be fine.
you’ll just get by quietly and smoothly at dinners or in passing through the hallways, enjoy eunbi’s comfortable king-sized bed and the fact that you don’t have to spend yet another holiday alone.
reruns of drake and josh play in the background, keeping your giggles quiet as drake soaks his feet in lizard pee. you feel your eyes grow heavy the more episodes you watch, the shitty laugh track and loud, bickering brothers eventually lulling you to sleep.
it takes about five knocks on the door to eventually stir you, your eyes fluttering open to see mr park’s figure in the doorway. you can only stare at the man as you adjust to him, taking in his tall, slim figure just a few feet away from you.
taking in the way his white shirt clings to his body, broad shoulders and slim torso on display in a way that makes you wish you could see, just for a second, what he looks like underneath that a-
“sorry if i woke you,” his deep voice hums, the slightest bit of amusement in his voice that causes your cheeks to warm. “i didn’t think you’d be sleeping at seven p.m.”
“no, it’s okay,” you stammer out, sitting up in eunbi’s bed. “i... i don’t even know when i fell asleep, to be honest.”
he looks at the screen to see drake and josh playing, a smirk pulling at his lips as his gaze shifts back to you.
“it’s funny,” you defend with a mumble, a deep chuckle leaving his mouth that causes butterflies to erupt in your stomach - he’s far too handsome, everything about him is just far too attractive, even in his laugh.
“that’s what eunbi claims,” he says, remembering all the years of his daughter forcing him to watch ridiculous shows.
despite his daughter’s outgoing nature, she never had a lot of friends growing up.
there was once a small group of girls she hung out but they quickly drifted apart throughout high school, leaving eunbi really only with him and her boyfriend.
the boyfriend who seonghwa really didn’t wanna like out of principal but seeing that the kid really does love his daughter quickly coming around.
“speaking of, where is she? jiwoon’s?”
“yeah,” you tell him, settling back into the pillows and stretching your arms out in front of you. “she said she’d be back for dinner.”
“well she’s wrong, as usual, because dinner’s ready,” he quips playfully, the smirk pulling at his lips causing you to smile back at him. you swallow nervously when his eyes roam over your face, your own gaze trained on him before you see his mouth start to move again.
“do you want me to bring some up for you? or you’ll come down?”
he can see the apprehension on your face immediately, fear crossing your eyes and your arms folding into each other uncomfortably. he tries to ignores the way your soft white sweater dips by your chest, a hint of perky cleavage just barely showing that causes his dick to twitch in his pants.
he doesn’t know when this happened.
he didn’t know when he became a pervy old man who checked out college girls with his wife just downstairs and the knowledge that you’re his daughter’s friend.
“i’ll come down,” you say, surprising him just as he was about to insist he brings some up for you. “she’ll probably be back soon anyway.”
but five minutes pass by, then ten, then twenty and eunbi’s still not home - it’s just you, seonghwa and mrs. park at the long, glass dining room table.
white chairs with high backs and comfortable cushions to match the immaculate, hospital-like color scheme and environment; truthfully, you’ve never been more terrified to eat a plate of chicken parmesan in your life.
the sound of utensils scraping on the china and the crackling of the fireplace a room over are the only noises heard throughout the home, mrs. park taking a swig of wine and gently placing it on the table with a light clack.
“so, y/n,” she finally says, breaking the tension with her rich-sounding, nasally voice. “how has school been, dear? you’re an... art major, am i remembering that correctly?”
“uh, photography, yeah,” you smile tensely, trying to ignore the judgment in her voice.
“ah, so you never switched over to business then,” she hums, her wine glass back in hand as her dark, gorgeous eyes look you over.
you bite the inside of your cheek as you feel a pink flush cover your face, faintly remembering your roommate saving you a few semesters ago when her mom was grilling you about picking a more practical and useful major.
“she can do whatever she wants, mom,” eunbi eventually snapped, “whether she does business or photography or even liberal arts is none of your business.”
“no,” you mutter out, dropping your gaze to look over the intricate pattern on the table. “i thought about it but it wasn’t something i wanted.”
“so you didn’t want something practical? or useful?” she asks, using those two words yet again while cocking her head to the side with a perfectly plucked eyebrow.
“a business degree would’ve been great, y/n. everyone always has connections to somewhere, you could’ve found a job right out of college.”
you bite back the urge to tell her no. that not everyone has connections to multi billion dollar companies or numbers of ceos in their phones or the ceo of a tech company as their next door neighbors.
but instead, the same way eunbi defended you against her mother, seonghwa does against his wife. gives you a soft, sympathetic side eye before placing his larger hand on his wife’s.
“there are tons of jobs in photography too, honey,” seonghwa says, his voice so warm and soft and welcoming compared to hers even despite the slight edge in it.
“and she can travel to build her portfolio. it’s a fantastic opportunity to explore the world and make money. is there a particular type of photography you’d wanna do?”
you feel yourself relax slightly, a small smile on your face as you nod your head toward the striking couple.
“i would love to be a wedding photographer actually,” you mumble, a romantic at heart who’s read and watched far too many novels and romcoms.
“taking pictures of all those moments would be really fun, i think. like when the groom sees the bride for the first time or just everyone dancing and having fun. weddings are usually happy and i like to photography happy things.”
“that sounds perfect for you then,” seonghwa smiles, his brown eyes lighting up and making you feel even more at ease.
“i think you’ll do great, y/n. and you only have a semester left, right? maybe you and eunbi you could travel for the summer before you start your jobs.”
you ignore the swish of dread and anxiety in your stomach at the mention of next semester, instead choosing to smile softly and nod your head at the man.
“i think she’d love that,” you giggle out, knowing damn well your roommate already has an extensive list of cities she wants to visit before ‘real life begins.’
“and how do your parents feel about everything?” mrs. park asks, making your stomach twist with even more dread and discomfort. “are they proud?”
you wish you could fold in on yourself right now, swallowing the growing, nervous lump in your throat.
because not only is she making you incredibly uncomfortable right now, with her harsh looks and topic of conversation and snide little tone, she just mentioned the people you haven’t spoken to since you left home at eighteen.
you don’t know what to say, you have the slightest bit of concern you might throw up on her, when the loud, chipper voice of your roommate floats through the cold, silent house.
“i’m back!” her chipper voice yelps, sock-clad feet running through the house and sliding on the marble floor. “what’d you guys make?”
“you’re late, eunbi,” seonghwa mumbles warningly, an innocent smile on her face as she picks up her plate of food and plops down next to you.
“am i? or are you girls just early?”
“i’m not a girl.”
“it’s a figure of speech, father,” eunbi says, smiling playfully at her father before turning to you.
she’s able to tell the second she sees your face that you’re uncomfortable, the pink flush still lingering on your face and the tenseness of your shoulders making her frown.
“i’m sorry you were alone with them,” she whispers, genuine sorrow in her wide, mock-innocent eyes. “i got held up. or... down, rather, but i tried to leave on time. i promise.”
“uh huh, i bet,” you mumble back, fighting back a smile despite your discomfort.
because eunbi has always had something about her that made it impossible to stay mad at her, her carefree, unfiltered way of communicating that made being her friend so easy.
even if, sometimes, you wanted to kill her.
“so mom,” eunbi quips, turning her soft gaze to you before looking over her mother.
“what was with your little group of bitchy housewives today? you couldn’t have had them over any other day? what kind of christmas disgrace is that?”
“eunbi...” seonghwa chastises lowly, the girl with her brow already quirked and eyes narrowed.
“i can do whatever i want in my home, eunbi. are you forgetting how things work around here?”
“how could i, when i’m met with thirty middle-aged women with botox out the ass in my home the second i get back from school?” she asks, “you didn’t think me and y/n would wanna spend the break, like, resting?”
“you ran off to your boyfriend’s the second you got here,” mrs. park bites back, her glass of wine empty as she pinches the bridge of her nose. “left your friend all alone in your room. what did i tell you about leaving... guests unattended in the house?”
the accusation and direction of conversation is quickly making you feel uncomfortable, your head turned down in your lap and leaving your cheeks aflame.
she’s making it sound like you would steal something in her home for christ’s sake, like you’re not a guest who’s dreaded coming here due to this very reason.
you block out the back and forth between eunbi and her mom, a few more seconds of yappy feminine voices before a deeply spoken “enough,” echoes through the dining room.
you even look up at the sound, watching as mr. park’s eyes rest on you. his eyes narrow as he takes in the sight of your red cheeks, his gaze shifting from you to his daughter to his wife beside him.
“y/n’s here for a month and we’re gonna make her feel welcomed the entire time. if you two are gonna fight, don’t do it at the dinner table.”
“but dad, she totally-”
“maybe you should’ve taught your daughter-”
“no more,” seonghwa growls, a sense of finality in his tone that causes the room to go silent.
you can tell your friend is unbothered by the reprimanding, shoveling food into her mouth and sipping from her wine glass completely unbothered.
sometimes you wish you could be more like her, so unfazed by conflict or loud voices or the strained relationship with a parent.
eunbi was always open with you about the rocky relationship with her mother, saying more than once to you that if it weren’t for her father, she would’ve long cut off any contact with her.
she had never really been there for eunbi growing up, having nannies and chefs take care of her for most of her life - it was her nanny of fifteen years who taught her how to walk and talk, was there with her for all the milestones she met through infancy, childhood and even adolescence.
but even then, eunbi was nonchalant and carefree about it.
saying that she’s not gonna waste her time being upset over it when she knows her mom doesn’t think about her at all. it makes your heart hurt for eunbi, grateful that the girl at least has a good relationship with her father and boyfriend.
and you, of course. you consider her your best friend and you know she does the same - even if sometimes, you wanna pull her hair out.
“i’m gonna go the food store tomorrow, eunbi, so if you and y/n want anything, just text it to me.”
“oooh can we come!” she squeals, knocking her arm into yours like an excited kid in a candy store. “we wanna try making our cookies again.”
“you’re gonna bake?” the girl’s father asks, a look of doubt on his face that causes you to bite back a smile.
“no, we’re gonna bake,” she corrects with snark, “y/n measures the ingredients and stirs, i put it in the oven and watch.”
“right, silly me,” the man hums, a smirk pulling at his lips the more he sees his daughter get irritated. “but of course you girls can come,” he says, his eyes flicking to you for just a few seconds too long.
you can only look back with a small smile, a quiet “thank you,” leaving your mouth that you’re positive he doesn’t catch.
(he did).
you help clean your plate off before you and eunbi go up to her room later that night, once her door’s closed and she’s sitting down shooting her a look of disdain.
“i know you’re mad, okay, i’m sorry, i really am!” she whines, holding her arms out for you to come over. “i tried to leave but he wouldn’t let me. he just kept wanting to-”
“i don’t need the details you sick freak!” you yelp, going over and plopping down on her bed. “ugh, it was just... so awkward. your mom hates me. she was utterly perturbed that i didn’t switch my major to business.”
“ugh, she’s a crotchety bitch i swear,” eunbi says, falling onto her back and looking at you with sorrow in her eyes. “i’m sorry, i really am. i won’t leave you alone with her again, i promise.”
you quirk an unconvinced eyebrow her way, eyes full of doubt and distrust before she throws herself on you and squeals that, at least, now you can have a scary movie marathon without any interruptions.
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it seems you also probably should’ve made her promise last night that you’d never be alone with her father either; it didn’t even occur to you at the time, not thinking that she’d really ditch you two days in a row.
but alas, jiwoon’s car pulled up when all three of you were walking out of the house to the g-wagon for the trip to the food store, her shooting you an apologetic look and whispered condolences in your ear.
“i’m technically not breaking my promise because my dad’s nice,” she mumbled, the feeling in your body more nervous and aroused than it is angry and upset.
but she could’t know that.
“and when i break your head? then what, eunbi?”
“i love you,” she giggles in your ear, the playful tone of your voice letting her know she got off the hook again. “it’ll be fine. my dad’s a good man. he wouldn’t ever talk shit to you the way my mom does.”
little does she know how much you want her dad to talk shit to you.
talk to you in a way that’s casual and playful and teasing, like the hints of it you’ve seen in the car or in eunbi’s room when you were alone last night. you just want him to look at you with the slightest bit of something, even though it’s wrong.
not only because of his wife, no matter how big a bitch she is, but because of-
“do you still wanna come with me?”
seonghwa’s voice pulls you away from your thoughts, looking to the man dressed in a long, black jacket and expensive loafers. he looks far too fancy and delectable for a trip to the grocery store.
eunbi is long gone by now, her giggles and carefree run down the driveway and into her boyfriend’s car leaving you and mr. park alone, with only the blue sky and crisp air as your witness.
him looking you over hopefully, with a twinge of teasing and longing in his gaze.
you looking at him full of nerves and excitement, biting down on your lip as you nod your head timidly.
“s-sure, if that’s okay,” you say, looking from him to his car just a few feet away. “it’d be better than sitting in eunbi’s room again.”
a handsome smile crosses his face as he nods his head, heart pounding and throat constricting as you watch him walk toward the car.
he walks around the front of a smaller, sleek suv, your own eyes watching in confusion until he opens the passenger side door.
you can only stare blankly, head cocked to the side as you really start to wonder if this man is about to make you drive his car costing more than your life.
“are you getting in, y/n?” he asks, an amused smile pulling at his lips - almost like he’s making fun of your nervous, intimidated disposition.
you shake your head of the confusion, cheeks flushing in the cold december air as you do an awkward jog toward the car. you dip in beside him as your body hits the cool leather, craning your neck to shoot him a small, grateful smile.
your faces are closer than you anticipated, breath catching in your throat as his gaze watches you closely.
he doesn’t say a word or move a muscle, taking a few moments for his eyes to roam your face and body before mumbling to buckle up.
you wish you knew how long the drive to the store would be, as it would slightly settle you and the thick, awkward tension in the air. it appears to be enough time for the heat to go on, warm air blowing from the vents before he asks if you want your seat heater on.
“oh, sure, thank you,” you mumble, a smile quirking on his lips as he presses down on the small circular button.
more silence lingers in the air as the trees outside you pass by, the bright winter sun and blue sky not making it feel like christmas is only a few days away.
you can’t remember the last time the holidays have actually felt like it, though,  all the lonely days blending into one and feeling as if they were the same.
maybe this year, because you’re surrounded by eunbi and her family, it’ll feel less lonely. maybe you’ll actually enjoy yourself and find that you’ve missed out when you denied her invitation each and every-
“i’m sorry about my wife last night.”
those are words you don’t expect so they shock you even more, looking at the older man beside you with a wide-eyed, confused gaze. his dark eyes are expressionless and casual on the road, one hand on the wheel while the other rests beside him.
“i... what do you mean?” you ask, knowing damn well you understand his apology - and given the unamused look he throws you, he knows you’re full of shit too.
“i don’t think she means to judge you so harshly,” he begins, his deep, smooth voice full of sympathy and softness. “it’s not her place to question your education or major, so i just want to apologize for her.”
“that’s not necessary, mr. park,” you insist, shaking your head as a small, breathy chuckle leaves you. “and it’s not like i haven’t heard it before.”
because no one is ever too confident in any of the arts being your main source of income or profession; even your own parents, although it really wouldn’t matter what you would have chosen, haven’t been supportive.
and you especially haven’t missed the looks of pity or distaste when you tell people on campus or at parties in the frat house, future business leaders or stem majors looking at you like just said the sky is hot pink.  
“well that’s just ridiculous,” seonghwa says, ripping you from your thoughts so you can roam over his strong, handsome face. “it’s a great field to work in and something you’re passionate about. that’s what matters most.”
he can tell by the way your cheeks flush that you’re slightly embarrassed and he can’t help but find it endearing, licking over his lips as his mind begins to wander.
wonder about what other parts of you could flush so easily or what else he could say to really make the pinkness deepen.
“i guess,” you mutter, shrugging your shoulders as you look at the passing oak trees and mansions.
“and... what you said last night about traveling to build my portfolio,” you begin, shocked by the words continuing to leave your mouth. “that’s something i’ve thought about doing. i think it’d be really fun, regardless if i did wedding photographer or not.”
“yeah?” he asks, the smile on his face causing your head to jump. “i think that’d be good, too. where would you wanna go first?”
your lips purse to the side as you think it over, a love for traveling anywhere you could but having an especially strong pull toward the tropics.
“cancun or the maldives,” you answer, the financial aspect of the trip leaving it most likely impossible for you. “it’ll probably never happen, because i’d have to sell my first born, but i’ve always wanted to go somewhere like that. somewhere tropical and fun.”
seonghwa bites his tongue about his multiple trips there, instead letting out a chuckle that causes butterflies to erupt. his eyes are too drawn to your body in the front seat, legs crossed and arms over your lap politely.
“you never know,” he hums, ripping his gaze away before you catch his gawking. “you might get there one day, after being the best wedding photographer the city has to offer.”
“oh, please,” you glggle out, cheeks flushing despite the absurdity of the comment.
you catch the smile that creeps on his face, the same handsome, carefree smile you saw in the car last time.
you try not to let it get to you, let your brain convince you that maybe he likes hanging out with you alone as much as you like it too.
“i’m serious,” he says, the earnest tone of his voice slipping into dad mode in a way he doesn’t even realize. “your parents must be proud.”
you bite down on your lip as you let out a soft, almost scornful, chuckle, a quietly mumbled “yeah,” leaving your mouth that causes his eyebrows to pull together.
he always thought it was a little suspicious that in the four years eunbi has known you, she’s never told him about your parents; as far as he knows, she’s never even seen them.
“she has her scholarship and stuff so she doesn’t really need them,” his daughter said one day, the two of them discussing why you were spending yet another break alone in the apartment.
“but they don’t want her home for the holidays? you told her she was welcomed, right?”
“ugh, about a thousand times,” his daughter groans in the seat, throwing herself against the window dramatically. “i basically begged her, dad, but she said she didn’t wanna intrude. i’m telling you it’s because mom is the biggest fucking-”
“eunbi...”
“you know it’s true!” she squeals, seonghwa biting his tongue in an effort to be the bigger and better parent. “i don’t even know why you guys got married.”
but that’s what happens with teen pregnancies and rich families. how they were destined to marry anyway, due to their parents companies and stupid business politics.
it was one drunken night at his dad’s company party and a broken condom that sealed his fate with finality - made him go from a single, carefree high school student to a married businessman with a child just two short years later.
his wife was good at one point he likes to think, remembering she was gorgeous and sassy and not like the other girls who would drop to their knees for him.
but marriage and a child and just life quickly caught up with them, already trapped in a loveless, pointless marriage by the time he hit 25.
he’d be lying if he said he didn’t stay for eunbi, that they both didn’t stay for eunbi throughout her childhood and now just grew too used to being an unhappy married couple who live separate lives.  
there was never any reason for them to divorce though, no one serious in his or his wife’s lives and the hassle of money and disputing houses and cars and assets far too draining.
“i don’t believe i’ve ever met them,” seonghwa says, pulling into the store parking lot to see it’s less crowded than he suspected it’d be. “what do they do?”
you couldn’t imagine anything more unbearable than disclosing to your friend’s hot dad who you may or may not have feelings for about the messed up relationship with your parents.
it just screams daddy issues, which might say a lot about your very attraction to him in the first place.
“they run a little restaurant back in my home town. it’s about three hours from campus, which is why i don’t really go home for breaks.”
seonghwa hums lowly, nodding his head as he looks at you at a stop sign.
you’re unnerved by the way his eyes roam you, like he can see signs of you being uncomfortable about your parents and wants to know why - but why would he care? you’re only his daughter’s roommate.
“do you miss seeing them?”
you lick over your lips nervously, watching as his eyes darken every so slightly.
he watches each and every of your movements carefully, so in tune with your reactions and breaths you can just feel yourself getting more and more worked up.
not in the slightest, you wanna say. i’ll probably never see them again and have no qualms about it, mr. park.
“i suppose,” you mutter, shrugging your shoulders as you apprehensively meet his gaze.
“you suppose?” he asks, concern etched on his face. “when was the time you’ve seen them? since your freshmen year?”
you avert your gaze as your teeth sink into your bottom lip, in no way wanting to have this discussion at ten a.m. when, much to your pleasure, an impatient car behind beeps at seonghwa’s mercedes.
his dark eyes move to the rearview mirror, narrowed and irritated in a way you can’t help but think is sexy, before he puts his foot off the break and turns into the parking lot.
“i think this person’s leaving,” you mutter when you notice another car go in reverse, seonghwa snatching the spot before the impatient, crotchety lady behind him could steal it.
you can’t help but smirk as seonghwa eyes her when you get out of the car, giving him a look that’s half judgmental and half amused.
“what? she beeped at me.”
“aren’t you supposed to be, like, an adult?”
he rolls his eyes as he takes a cart from the pile, nodding his head for you to go in front and “stop talking back to an elder.”
you can’t help but smirk at his playfulness, taking your spot in the front and pretending as if you always move your hips this much when you walk casually; you would’ve felt embarrassed, had you not turned around a few moments later to see his eyes already on you.
“where to first, mr. park?”
he has to bite back the groan threatening to leave his mouth, reminding himself to keep himself in check this month - starting tomorrow.
“depends, y/n,” he hums, voice far too deep and sultry to be surrounded by innocent bystanders in the grocery store. “what do you want?”
words are caught in your throat and you can only stare dumbly, your plan quickly back firing as he appears to do the same - but it’s gotta be in your head, right?
regardless, it quickly humbles you in the form of a small, unsure shrug.
it’s how you two start walking up and down the aisles, seonghwa putting in what he remembers and items on his mental list while also insisting you put in anything you want.
your arms bump ever so often, softly apologizing and acknowledging it the first few times before you both realize it may be happening on purpose.
you stick close to him when the aisles get tight and crowded, his deep voice telling you to “go ahead,” causing you to swallow shakily. you feel the presence of his hand just a few inches from your hips, lingering and hovering but never fully touching.
it’s finally when you’re in the bread aisle, seonghwa a few feet away talking to the man at the bakery counter, that you decide to put something in the cart.
you would usually never accept someone’s offer to buy you something, already feeling bad about staying with them rent free and eating their meals without compensating.
but the brioche loaf brand is one of your favorites, only sold on occasion at the corner store near campus.
you press up on your tippy toes to grab the bag of bread, stretching your arm up with all your might. the plastic slips through your fingers just as you’re about to snatch it down, letting out an annoyed huff as you pulled down your sweater dress.
you mumble your annoyances before trying again, back on the tips of your toes with your arm raising when you feel a hand on the small of your back.
it’s large and warm and seeping through the thin material of your burgundy dress, a snappy protest about to leave your mouth when you catch mr. park’s face in your peripheral.
there’s a content look on his face as he takes the bag with ease, holding it above your head as his hand moves from your back to your waist with a gentle touch.
you look at him with wide eyes and a pounding heart, his hand on your waist so foreign and strange but... good. something you didn’t even realize you’d been craving until it happened.
the strength and warmth of his hand, though if you think about it just enough, you can feel the weight of his wedding band through the fabric.
“is this what you wanted?”
his voice is deep and low as he speaks to you and you alone, your eyes raising to see him staring down at you. you can’t make out the expression in them, just the darkness in his eyes and the frantic beating of your heart.
you can’t even being to understand the context of his words right now because, yes, this is exactly what you’ve wanted - but he doesn’t know that, right?
“w-what?”
he can’t help the smirk that crosses his face, all sorts of pride and satisfaction and arousal coursing through his veins at your current disposition.
“the bread,” he says, stepping back and holding it out to you. “is this the one you wanted?”
your eyes narrow as you look at him, the smirk on his face, the amusement in his gaze, the playfulness that’s radiating off him - is he fucking with you?
“oh... i... yes,” you finally say, coming to your senses and not allowing yourself to think this way anymore. “that’s the one. i hope it’s okay.”
“of course,” he hums, placing the bread in the cart before going back to the front handles. “you can get anything you want, i already told you that.”
you nod dumbly as you follow beside him, seonghwa picking more things off the shelves and muttering the list to himself as you try to get your shit together.
because yes, you’re attracted to him and yes, you’ve found yourself alone with him for more than two days in a row and yes, there’s been some lingering looks and touches but that doesn’t mean anything.
you can’t let your own deluded thoughts and desires get in the way of reality.
the reality that he’s your friend and roommate’s married father and you’re a college student. he doesn’t want you just as much as you shouldn’t want him so what’s the problem here?
maybe it’s that you’re a 22-year-old woman who’s only been on a handful of dates.
that the last time you made out with someone was when you were drunk and dared to kiss the first guy that walked through the bar (luckily, somewhat attractive and surprisingly polite).
that, maybe, you’re so horribly touch-starved and aching for affection, you’re trying to find it in a hot father figure who’s just as kind as he sexy - and that, you think, is the second most tragic thing here.
because the first would absolutely be thinking that any of this, any of these stares or touches or coincidences of eunbi leaving you two alone, means something.
means that maybe this break is for you two is create an attraction and build some sort of bond and-
“y/n.”
you’re barely able to register seonghwa’s voice before his arm is wrapped around your waist, pulling your body into his taller one and having you pressed up right against him.
you were so lost in thought of him that you didn’t see the older women skirting her cart around the aisle quickly, phone pressed to her ear as she yells to her husband about the christmas ham.
you’re not even sure if she shoots you a look of sorrow or utters any apology, too consumed and distracted by the feeling and proximity of mr. park.
his arm wrapped around you, your body pressed flush up against him, his neck craned down to look at you with a building... something in his eyes. playfulness and teasing but also something darker, something that makes your stomach swoop and renders you unable to move.
“are you always so clumsy and distracted?” he mumbles lowly, his deep voice quiet for only you two to hear - like he knows even in a sea of strangers, he has to keep these interactions quiet.
“what would you do if i wasn’t here to help you, y/n?”
i wouldn’t have been distracted in the first place, you’re tempted to say - but you certainly don’t wanna open that can of worms, especially not in the middle of this grocery store with the way your heart is pounding.
“i... i’m sorry, i was distracted,” you mutter, playing up the damsel in distress just a little bit. “my mistake, mr. park.”
he licks over his lips, swearing his name just being spoken has never effected him like this. he doesn’t even know where this attraction came from, seeing you leave the dorm building yesterday morning and something in his body jumping at the sight of you.
maybe it’s just showing how unhappy he really is with his life, living day to day to just work. hang out with his friends and go to sleep alone - he doesn’t remember the last time his wife touched him, looked at him like she wanted him or made any move to be with him.
he just knows that you showed up, looking so pretty and wide-eyed and coy, and is now about to lose his mind.
“it’s alright,” he says, hoping you don’t hear the thick tension he hears in his own voice, like he’s some idiotic, hormonal young boy. “i think we only have a few more aisles left, anyway.”
he plucks the remaining items off the shelves before you both make your way to the self check-out, him scanning and you bagging because “eunbi says if my career as a photographer fails, i could be the best grocery bagger ever.”
“that’s just because she puts the bread on the bottom,” seonghwa mutters, a smile on your face as you nod your head - she squished one too many of your brioche loafs before you realized bagging just wasn’t for her.
your fingers graze ever so often, the coldness of his tips a stark contrast to your warmer ones.
a particularly big, bulk bag of vegetables proves to be a challenge for you, working through the packed bag with some difficulty. you let out an annoyed groan as you play a dangerous game of tetris, trying not to rip open the brown paper bag.
you finally get the box inside, a little bit prouder than you care to admit, when your precious brioche loaf is dropped right atop. you look up at seonghwa to see him already apologizing, your brow raised as you look at the older man in confusion.
did he think your hand was out? why would he just throw the food at you?
but it’s only when you feel a little more air than normal on your chest that you see what could’ve possibly caused the distraction, the white lace from your bra sticking out.
your cleavage in this dress was hidden for the most part, only becoming a little more obvious when you moved around or packed a shitload of groceries. it makes you bite back a smirk as you put two and two together, looking up to see his eyes still lingering over you.
two can play at this game mr. park.
“mr. park,” you begin, feigning a certain kind of innocence as you place your bread atop the other groceries and finally look up at him. “are you always so clumsy?”
it takes a few seconds for a smile to pull at his lips, the tick in his jaw not going unnoticed to you - so maybe this wasn’t all in your head. maybe he wants you too... possibly.
“you’re funny, y/n,” he mumbles, a smile pulling at your lips as he takes out his black card. “i guess i was distracted, too.”
you swallow the lump in your throat as you feel the slightest hint of arousal run through you, shaking it off and letting out a forced, girlish chuckle.
you pack the car a few minutes later without any lingering eyes or touches, seonghwa telling you about the meals they plan on cooking for christmas.
they usually don’t make their own food for holidays but decided to have a more traditional set up for you and eunbi’s arrival - he also hasn’t cooked a meal for his family in god knows how long.
“that’ll be great, thank you,” you tell him, clicking your seatbelt in as he backs out the spot. “i’m kind of a picky eater but i’ll eat anything you guys provide me.”
“and you have the whole brioche loaf,” seonghwa says, a giggle leaving your mouth as you nod your head.
“true. it’s really good.”
“i’ve never tried, perhaps you’d be willing to-”
his wife’s name popping up on his car dashboard acts as a way to bring you back to reality, brings a certain kind of silence over the both of you for a few seconds.
like he wasn’t just rubbing his body against yours and you weren’t just flirting with him in the form of smirking lips and snarky comments.
you watch a twinge of annoyance behind seonghwa’s eyes, gaze roaming over the screen as if he’s in contemplation before muttering “one second.”
“hello?”
“where are you?” her voice snaps in annoyance, “i told you we had that board meeting at one.”
“and it’s only noon,” his deep voice mumbles, not matching her level of irritation but sounding a whole lot different than a few seconds ago. “me and y/n are coming back now.”
“y/n?” she spats, like it’s a disgusting piece of food she wouldn’t dare put in her mouth. “what about eunbi?”
“she went off with jiwoon before i could get her in the car.”
“so it was only you two?” she asks, the snide judgment and underlying tone in her voice causing your stomach to churn. “did she ask you to buy a bunch of-”
“i’ll be home in twenty and then be on my way over,” he says, cutting her off and hanging up before she can even get another word you.
your stomach churns and a sick feeling comes over you, her utter dislike and disdain for you causing you to bite your lip.
because not only does she not like you to be with her daughter, she doesn’t want you with her husband (although, you suppose, you can’t really blame her for that one).
“i’m sorry about that,” seonghwa winces, the silence lingering between you two heavy. “you could’ve gotten anything you wanted, y/n. this is your christmas too. don’t feel bad about anything, okay?”
you swallow the lump in your throat, your gaze moving to his as he stops at the red light.
your eyes lingering over his and his doing the very same, hand twitching to reach out and move the piece of hair from your slightly flushed face.
and there was something about the way you were both looking at each other, eyes so focused and unwavering and honest, that had you thinking maybe all of this wasn’t in your heads.
but it didn’t mean either of you could act on it - they were just... feelings of lust and wonder and all things forbidden, not seriously believing that a relationship like this could unfold right under the nose of his wife, his daughter and your roommate.
unless the pull was so desperate.
so overwhelming and all-consuming and present between the both of you, little moments couldn’t help but happen.
strike one:
with none other than eunbi as a distraction, the girl promising she wasn’t gonna leave you alone anymore, you were able to take your mind off everything.
the tension-filled, heart pounding moments with mr. park that felt just as wrong as they did right.
you spent a few nights going out with her, jiwoon and all of their high school friends, a surprisingly nice group of young adults who you got along well with.
they were loud and crazy and did far too many shots but they also seemed to be genuinely kind. even the boy who was flirting with you all night, handsome and tall with pretty dark eyes, acted as a good distraction.
grinding up against him as the music pounded throughout the bar, alcohol coursing through your veins allowing you to forget about the older man who’s been living in your head for almost a week now.
“how have i never met you before, y/n?” the boy mumbled lowly in your ear, your head against his shoulder carelessly.
but it was right there in that moment, him saying your name, that the moment was over.
because it just didn’t sound like seonghwa, as delusional as that was.
it didn’t get your heart racing or lips quirking the same way it did when you heard the older man say it. the smile attached to his handsome, mature face and the deep, lowly spoken tone that always held a hint of teasing and sincerity.
“but danny really is so freakin’ nice!” eunbi squeals to you on christmas eve, the two of you in her immaculately white and modern kitchen prepping the chocolate chip cookie cough for tomorrow.
“and you two seemed to be getting along, i saw your ass all up on him.”
“eunbi, that wasn’t me. that was the vodka. i don’t know who that girl was.”
she throws her head back as a loud chuckle leaves her, telling you again that she warned you her snobby, rich little friends have been able to handle their liquor since middle school.
it’s how they cope, she had said, unloved kids with more money than god learning to deal with the world of limitless funds and minimal parental supervision.
“well he hasn’t stopped asking me about you, you know,” she hums, her eyebrows quirked suggestively as she mixes the bowl of ingredients lazily.
“and not just because of your newfound grinding skills, which by the way, are usually learned by the tenth grade.”
your eyes narrow at her comment, throwing a small ball of dough at her that she, impressively, catches in her mouth.
“he really is just, like, so taken by you, y/n. seriously. i told him that you’re graduating this year with a degree in photography and he nearly came in his pants. he loves the artsy girls.”
“you are so vile,” you snort out, shaking your head at the girl sitting criss-crossed on the counter. “and stop saying that. we both know i’m not graduating this year,” you mumble, her face falling pathetically.
“i told you we’re gonna find a way,” she whines lowly, looking at you with all kinds of sympathy and sadness in her eyes - she would offer to pay for you, if she didn’t think you would smack her upside the head.
“oh and what? is my new boyfriend danny gonna do that for me?”
“in exchange for more grinding and a photoshoot, i think. do you want me to try?”
she lets out another giggle despite the way you pinch her leg, peeking inside the bowl with a surprising amount of pride.
"this looks good,” you mumble, swiping your finger to collect some of the chocolate dough.
“hey!” she whines brattily, thrusting a spoon toward your hand just a second too late.  
“why are you whining in here like a child, eunbi?” seonghwa asks, walking through the entryway and the large, white island in the center. “what are you making? please don’t burn the house down.”
“haha dad, you’re so funny,” she mocks sarcastically, jumping down from the counter with her hands on her hips. “where are the baking sheets?”
a simple shrug from her father causes her to roll her eyes, grumbling about how she was really trying to avoid her bitch of a mother today. he holds back his smirk, about to reprimand her before she’s out the kitchen and shouting for her mother upstairs.
it’s only you and seonghwa in the kitchen now, a heavy silence in the air as you stand there dumbly - bowl beside you, cookie dough adorning the top of your finger.
“what are you girls making?” he finally asks, his body moving closer and closer causing you to swallow.
“i... uh, cookie dough. for tomorrow,” you say, lifting your finger and wiggling the tip full of batter. “chocolate chip.”
his eyes move to your finger before grazing over your mouth, his tongue peeking out ever so slightly as he reminds himself to act right.
he hasn’t been alone with you since that day at the food store, just seeing you in passing in the hallways or outside the house as you and eunbi went to and fro.
he hears your giggles at night and tired groans in the morning, quietly yelling at his daughter to wake up and get her ass out of bed.
and he knows it’s probably for the better, that you two don’t find yourselves alone with each other, but he can’t help but feel a rush of excitement right now.
you watch as he moves closer, with the same wide-eyed look you’ve been giving him since he first saw you in your apartment weeks ago.
“ahh, you’re making it from scratch? that’s ambitious.”
“yeah, we googled a recipe,” you tell him, finger still beside you in the air.
you don’t know what causes you to be so bold, maybe him attempting to carry out a normal conversation even though he’s looking at you with so much lust and desire, but you can’t stop once you start.
“how’s it taste?” he asks, his voice deep and slightly strained as he nods his head toward your finger.
you don’t even bat an eye as you slip the tip of your finger in your mouth slowly, swirling your tongue around as you take up all the dough on your skin.
it’s sweeter than you originally thought it’d be but it tastes good nonetheless, keeping your eyes on him as you reamin as innocent and unassuming as possible.
“it’s good,” you say, dropping your finger like you didn’t just make a show of licking and sucking it. “i like it better raw.”
you don’t even realize your words until you see the fleeting look on his face, tongue swiping across his lip and eyes hardening. they roam you so slowly and darkly, you can’t control the growing butterflies and swooping in your lower stomach.
“mm, me too,” he hums lowly, the hardening of his cock in his pants something he hasn’t felt in forever. it’s taking everything in him to control himself, from his eyes popping out of his head to letting out the deepest of growls in the back of his throat.
“do you want some?” you ask, cocking your head to the side questioningly.
he has to desperately hold on to his composure, not think about how easy it’d be to pin you against the cabinet right behind you. take just a few steps closer, have your back against the cold granite and let you feel just how much he wants some.
but he has to play it cool, push down these building desires and ignore your teasing because he’s almost fucking positive that’s what’s happening here.
“want some what?” he asks, his voice lowering just a tad.
he hasn’t played a game like this since college, watching as your eyes widen and brow quirks up.
but he sees that’s exactly what it is when you turn around and face the bowl of cookie dough to him, a smile just as sweet as the cookies on your face.
“cookie dough. before we put them in the oven and possibly burn them.”
the breathy chuckle he lets out leaves your stomach in shambles, his tongue peeking out and poking the inside of his cheek causing a swooping sensation to flood through you.
but before he can even think to say anything, before your eyes can look over his body and make you feel even more warm and bothered, eunbi floats back in and fiddles in the cabinets for the baking sheets.
“that woman is too much, i swear,” she grunts, whipping out the materials quickly before her head snaps to her father. “why are you still here?”
“i wanted some cookies. and to ensure y/n won’t allow you do burn down the kitchen.”
“it was one time, dad, and an accident. how many times do i have to defend myself in this house?”
you let out a giggle as you look from eunbi to seonghwa, your roommate turning her back to set up the practice baking session.
“let’s go bitch! i hope we didn’t fuck this up.”
seonghwa’s eyes roam over you for a few more moments, his tongue swiping across his lips before, finally, leaving the kitchen with his dick hard as a rock.
strike two:
christmas consisted of successful cookies per your and eunbi’s homemade batch, passive aggressive comments from mrs. park about your degree and a whole fuck ton of sexual energy between you and seonghwa.
you could almost always feel when his gaze was boring into you, when you got up to take more mashed potatoes or kept your attention on eunbi as she told her parents about what job she wants to start at next semester.  
it’s also when eunbi almost let it slip about your scholarships, had you not viciously pinched her arm and caused a pained cry to leave her mouth - if you ever thought jiwoon was gonna verbally assault you, it was certainly in that moment.
“why did you pinch me so hard?” she whined later that night, jiwoon passed out on the couch after five too many homemade cookies. “look at my bruise.”
a genuine frown crosses your lips as you look at her arm, rubbing her skin gently as you mumble your soft spoken apologies.
“i’m sorry but i just... i didn’t want your mom to know that,” you say back just as whiney and pathetic. “she already thinks i’m an incompetent idiot. knowing i have to wait a whole year because i’m broke is just too embarrassing.”
it’s an admission that, while eunbi already suspected that, still makes her feel bad - it nearly makes her wanna cry, that you don’t feel welcomed and loved in her home because her mom has to be a judgmental bitch.
“y/n...”
“bi, it’s fine, oh, my god do not cry right now,” you grumble, flicking her in the head lightly.
“i just feel bad,” she cries lowly, moving hrself closer to you and away from her boyfried. “it’s not fair, y/n. you worked so hard and now you have to wait. how could they do this to you?”
a small, touched smile crosses your face at eunbi as you shake your head, dabbing at her watery eyes.
if jiwoon wakes up, he’s literally gonna beat my ass,” you say, smiling when a wet giggle leaves eunbi; you don’t want this time to be sad or upsetting. “i thought he was gonna hit me at dinner.”
“okay if he’s hitting anything, it’s gonna be my-”
“no. no, no, no.”
the snort that leaves her mouth doesn’t help the sinking feeling in her stomach, looking at you with a frown still adorning her face.
“i’m sorry if my mom’s making you feel uncomfortable. she does it to every single person ever and i don’t-”
“it’s fine, please stop apologizing for her,” you say, the sinking reminder in the back of your mind that seonghwa had been doing the very same thing - apologizing for that woman.
“i know she’s stressing you out, too. we’re in it together.”
“that’s true,” she sighs, letting out a long, dramatic groan before resting her head on your shoulder. “i’m so bloated, i don’t think i’m ever gonna be able to eat again.”
and it was funny that, days after the holiday, eunbi was still convinced that she was bloated from christmas dinner.
“babe, i don’t even think that’s possible,” jiwoon consoled her, you and him sitting in her room as she gets ready to go down to the pool.
because, naturally, like everyone in this godforsaken rich town, they get ready to go to the pool that’s inside of their homes; when eunbi told you to pack a bathing suit back at your apartment, you looked at her like she was insane.
until she clarified that her pool is heated and, conveniently, indoors.
“just through the backyard,” she had said - and she truly meant it.
just a few yards away from the main deck area, with floor to ceiling glass windows that showcase the extravagant landscaping and, of course, the outdoor pool and jacuzzi just a few feet away.
“eunbi, this is insane,” you say, marveling at the sight before you.
“don’t you wish you came sooner?” she asks with a wink, your eyes rolling as you place down your towel.
you had the option to bring two bathing suits - a skimpy black one you don’t remember being so scandalous or a red one you remember eunbi insisting you buy last summer.
and you just knew it was because danny was coming, currently showcasing his impressive eight pack that, truly, just doesn’t do it for you - maybe if he was twenty years older, apparently, and somebody’s father and husband.
you shake the thoughts out of your head, walking a few steps toward the pool before eunbi tackles you from behind. you both land with a loud splash, followed by the excited shouts and loud splashes of her other friends.
you’d be lying if you said you could remember the last time you had this much fun, splashing and giggling and acting so carefree despite the many challenges you’ll have to face soon.
but that’s not any of your concern right now, currently sitting atop danny’s shoulders and trying to knock down eunbi in a game of chicken.
“you little bitch! get your nails out of me!”
“coming from the girl who literally just tried to choke me two seconds ago!”
“like it’s your first time being choked!”
and you don’t know whether jiwoon was shocked by you saying that statement or the fact that his girlfriend exposes all of her sexual kinks to you but alas, it did the trick in sealing you a victory.
a smug smile on your face as danny jumps up and down in excitement, your body bouncing and nearly falling over him had you not gripped onto his shoulders.
it’s at that time eunbi pops up from the water, hair a soaking mess and mascara running down her face. she’s about to open her mouth, probably to yell at you, before a volleyball is thrown through the air and just misses her face.
instead, it hits danny square in the head. the boy letting out a yelp before you promptly fall backwards in the water, hearing eunbi’s shrill squeal and giggle on your way down.
you pop up and throw her a dirty look, danny rubbing at the back of his side before apologizing profusely.
“it’s okay,” you giggle out, about to say you shouldn’t have been up there for so long before eunbi’s squealing in the air.
“dad, what the hell kind of aim was that!”
you feel your body stiffen before you quickly shoot around, none another than mr. park standing there looking as handsome as ever.
he puts the young men around you to shame, good-looking, muscular college boys who anyone in their right mind would find attractive - but they just don’t beat him.
his striking eyes or tall, lean stature or the fact that he’s just so fucking-
“got worse with age, bi, what can i say?” he chuckles, extra white fluffy towels in his hold that he places on the chair. “sorry, danny.”
seonghwa’s known danny for a few years now, one of jiwoon’s friends who seems... alright. not a bad guy but also not a good guy - just kind of there; but it didn’t occur to the man just how much he was bothered by him until he saw you on his shoulders.
because he could’ve put you in danger, of course. put you in danger at his house where if things got bad, he’d be responsible; as for the ball, it merely slipped from his finger tips.
“no problem mr. park,” the kid smiles, the other friends gathering around and looking at him expectantly. “we’re gonna play a round of volleyball. you in?”
“no. no dads allowed,” eunbi whines, seonghwa rolling his eyes at his bratty adult daughter.
“why not? because i’m better than all of you, eunbi?”
“oh please,” she grumbles lowly, rolling her eyes and grabbing you to lead you toward the stairs. “you know what, we’re going in the hot tub anyway. since she decided to rock my shit in chicken. enjoy my father traitors,” eunbi grumbles to jiwoon and his friends.
“i did not,” you protest weakly, feeling two pairs of eyes on you as you make your way out of the pool with your friend.
the first thing that strikes seonghwa, apart from the major twitch in his pants, is how skimpy your bikini is.
red bottoms with thin straps holding it up, a matching red top showcasing cleavage and beauty marks on your chest and all the things that are proving to drive him fucking crazy upon seeing you every day.
it’s taking everything in him to control the growing ache in his shorts, your eyes looking at him so coyly and attentively that you’re ignoring the college boy gawking at you right in front of him.
there’s a certain sort of twisted pride in his chest, you giving him attention and seemingly reciprocating his interest, when there’s someone younger right there for you.
younger and unmarried and more suitable for you. someone you can actually be with where it wouldn’t be considered dirty or wrong or secretive; but maybe that’s why you’re both drawn to it in the first place.
that, and because you’re both really hot.
“he’s literally hot, y/n! why don’t you like him?” eunbi whines to you, the two of you sitting across from one another in the hot tub outside.
the december air is crisp but feels nice comapred to the steaming water you’re gratefully submerged in. anything to take you away from mr. park shirtless and wet in the pool right now.
“i do like him, bi,” you mutter, trying your best to convince her and now seem suspicious.
“okay, yeah, as a person but who cares about that!” she whines, flopping her hands dramatically in the water. “you don’t want him to rail you.”
“eunbi!” you squeak, splashing in her direction as a warm, embarrassed blush rises to your cheeks.
“i’m serious y/n. you’ve never been railed before and danny’s such a good option. he’s hot and he’s sweet and he’s so pathetically into you, it’s a little sick.”
you don’t know what to say so you don’t say anything, shooting her a look that screams can we please not talk about this because you don’t know how much i actually wanna be railed by your father so let’s stop this discussion.
but she only rolls her eyes, moving herself closer to you so she can tug at your arm annoyingly.
“is he just not your type?” she questions, her eyebrows pulling together in confusion for a few moments before utter shock crosses her face.
“wait, what is your type? it’s... men, right? have i been hooking you up with the wrong gender this whole time?” she asks in disbelief, “could we have been hooking up this whole time?”
you press your lips together so you don’t burst out laughing, dryly replying “yes, eunbi, i’m into men.”
but the more you think about it, the more you think maybe you don’t have a type.
“and i’ve... never really thought about it before, to be honest. i just know i’m not into like... frat guys or whatever.”
because any party you’d been to, any douchey college guy wearing a backwards hat or cut off shirt, you had never been more disinterested. you couldn’t ever picture yourself falling for someone like that, romantically or sexually.
the one time you remember thinking someone was hot was when you took film and lit with your 31-year-old professor.
“so older guys?” eunbi concludes after hearing that, a smirk on her face as she raises her eyebrows playfully. “we gotta scope out some golf courses or retirement homes?”
“please,” you scoff, a giggle leaving her mouth as she throws her head back gleefully.
“okay, really though, i’ll tell danny you’re not interested and to stop trying so hard if you’re really not interested.”
but maybe danny as a distraction will be good.
will make you see that, perhaps, someone single and your own age and not your best friend’s father will be good thing for you to explore.
so you shrug lightheartedly, the smirk on your face causing eunbi to let out a low “oooh shit.”
you look over at her and your smile only widens when she knocks your shoulder, saying that you’re looking to be a play girl and drain a rich, lovesick man of some christmas presents.
“yeah, right! why drain a rich man when i can drain my best friend,” you tease, looking around her yard and still in astonishment that this is really her life. “i mean, two pools? is that really necessary?”
“three actually. there’s one behind the guest house on the other side. a small one. very humble.”
“oh, a small one, okay. great.”
she lets out another giggle, the two of you talking over plans for new years eve.
you might go up to jiwoon’s parents house in the mountains for the weekend, spend the time drinking with the small group of friends you’ve come to genuinely like over these past few weeks.
“it’s only two hours away so it won’t be that bad either,” she says, getting up to shake the hot water off her arms. “i’ll be right back, i have to pee.”
you nod your head, grateful she didn’t piss in the pool and allowing yourself to sit there, eyes closed, body relaxed, in the silence.
you can hear the faint screams of the boys from the indoor pool area and the swish of the hot tub filter, peeking open your eyes when, suddenly, you think you hear a boom of thunder in the distance.
you watch the sky darkening and clouds coming in, signaling a storm is coming in soon and quick. a sigh leaves your mouth, enjoying your last few moments of peace before finally standing in the hot tub.
the crisp winter air blows and sends goosebumps up your arms, a shiver running through your body as you attempt to splash some hot water on your upper body.
you don’t know how you know someone’s watching you but you do, some sort of strange intuition within you looking up to see none other than mr. park standing a few feet away from the hot tub.
his dark hair is wet and hanging in his face, swimming trunks soaked and his exposed chest still dripping chlorine water.
you press your lips together as your eyes roam his chest, a hint of abs on his lean stomach that causes a small, strangled groan to leave your mouth - you will never understand how this man is pushing 40.
but the same way you’re looking at him, he’s looking at you.
water covering your body, currently hunched over trying to warm the rest of your body; but it’s when you stand he really starts to gawk, your figure standing full and tall and giving him a perfect view of your hardening nipples from the cold crisp air.
you can see the lust in his eyes the same way you know he can and you’re about to do something to just make him crack. mistakingly untie your bottoms, catching them at the last second so he thinks he’s about to get a peak.
or undo the back of your top and pout at him, ask him to please tie it back for you because it’s way too hard to reach behind and do it yourself.
or maybe you’ll just drop to your knees right there, try to see if there’s any hint of a bulge in his swimming trunk bottoms and-
his body is gone just as fast as he arrived, confusion covering your face before you shake your head of your perverted thoughts - dropping to your knees when his daughter and wife are right here, what the fuck is wrong with you today?
you blame eunbi, all her talk about getting railed when you’ve been wanting to jump her father’s bones.
you carefully make your way out of the hot tub, not wanting to eat shit and scarp your leg on the concrete.
it feels like you’re about to freeze in the cold, another shiver wracking your body before you turn to stick your cold, goosebump-ridden arms back in the hot tub. it warms you for just a few seconds, a low, satisfied hum leaving your mouth before you hear footsteps coming up from behind you.
something in you tells you it’s him again.
whether it be the way your body heats up and feels prickly, the obvious feeling of eyes burning into your exposed back causing you to remain still and oblivious.
but you can longer remain oblivious a few seconds later, when a tall body is just a few inches away from completely pressing against you.
“you forgot a towel,” is all he says, placing it on the wet rim of the hot tub.
when he leans forward to place the white towel down, he’s careful and meticulous with his movements. brushing up against you every so slightly and carefully that you can feel his hard bulge on your ass for a few seconds too long.
at first you think you’re crazy, feeling what you were trying to envision in your head, but then you absolutely know it there’s.
you can feel the wetness from his bathing suit on your legs, his cock right there resting on the thin, red fabric of your bikini bottoms and if you were as weak as you felt inside, if he stayed there just a little bit longer, a moan would’ve absolutely left your mouth.
if you pushed back just a little to feel more of his cock on you, grind your ass his hardness just enough to hear him let out a low groan or maybe curse a little.
but he moves away, almost like he knew the perfect amount of time before that happened and almost like he did it by accident - but when you turn around and see the look in his eyes, you know it wasn’t.
the same way he can see a palpable desire and surprise and tension in your gaze, causing him to suppress a growing smirk. it makes you wanna tease him back in whatever way you can but you know that eunbi’s due back from the bathroom at any moment.
so you only cock your head to the side, lick over your lower lip carefully as you grasp the towel in your hands gently.
“thank you, mr. park,” you say, your voice as airy and sweet as you can possibly make it without sounding like an idiot.
“you’re welcome, y/n,” he says, taking a few steps back as his eyes lock on you. he stays there for a few moments until he hears the door to the pool house open.
you watch his lustful, dark expression change right then and there, a towel wrapping around his lower body and his face stretching into a happy, father-approved look.
“so you’re good with anything for dinner, y/n?” he asks, his voice loud and clear enough for his approaching daughter to hear. “i know you mentioned you were picky.”
“let’s get pizza!” eunbi screeches through the air, telling seonghwa that everyone’s staying over and they’ll need at least four boxes.
but you can’t even think about pizza right now, not when this moment right here is solidifying the crazy thought in your head that your best friend’s dad wants you just as much as you want him.
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you called him out later that night around one a.m., after eunbi and jiwoon were the last to pass out to your scary movie marathon.
the others were sprawled out on the basement floor, an intricate array of blankets and pillows on the floor that you attempted to weave through, both, skillfully and quietly.
there was a dryness in your throat that could only be settled by a cold glass of water, making your way through the house quietly and praying you don’t run into mrs. park.
she’s been just as passive aggressive as she usually is in front of people so you could never imagine being alone with her. wondering what the hell she’d say to you without seonghwa and eunbi as buffers.
you were relieved when the lights were off in the kitchen, padding your way to the fridge to take out a bottle of water. you twist and turn the cap off to gulp down the cold liquid in the refrigerator light, a quiet gasp leaving you as your thirst is quenched.
you briefly consider going up to eunbi’s room to sleep tonight, not sure how you feel about being squished in with eunbi and jiwoon cuddling on the couch, when the light suddenly flicks off.
it causes you to freeze and halt all thoughts, fear running through you for all three seconds before you see seonghwa’s tall, familiar figure pass you. you watch him carefully in the dim light of the fridge, his shirtless chest yet again right in front of your face.
leaned back against the counter across from you, giving you a perfect view of his toned chest and gray sweatpants.
“midnight snack?” he asks, the smirk on his face almost causing you to roll your eyes.
instead, your lips quirk into a small smile. raising your water bottle by your head and shaking it, the water swishing in your pounding ears.
“just water,” you respond quietly, matching his low tone. “i hope that’s okay.”
“that you took water? of course, y/n,” he says, amusement in his gaze as he looks you over.
you’re freshly showered and in a pair of pajamas, matching pink sets that eunbi got you for christmas one year - he remembers because he was with her when she bought it.
a soft smile crosses your face, your back getting cold from the open fridge but not daring to move a muscle. not with him looking at you the way he is and with his body just a few feet away from you.
a silence lingers in the kitchen, you not sure why he’s looking at you and him waiting to see if you say something, before he bites the inside of his cheek.
“i wanted to say sorry about before.”
your eyebrow quirks up, interest so clearly peaked as you cock your head to the side.
“what do you mean?”
a smirk crosses his face as he watches you play dumb, head cocked and eyes wide and everything about you with such mock innocence, he thinks that’s what’s driving him the most crazy.
that you do this shit and say certain things with almost complete unawareness and innocence, if it weren’t for the hidden look of desire and teasing in your eyes.
“you know,” is all he says, his voice dipping and eyes twinging darker, it makes your lower stomach swoop.
a part of is positive, even if you ask, he’s not gonna say it aloud.
he’s not gonna say or acknowledge any of this aloud and make you guys play this game until you leave in a few weeks.
and then when you leave, unsure about your next prospects of college or education or even living arrangements, who knows if you’re ever gonna see him again.
so you only hum lowly, closing the fridge behind you and leaving you both in darkness. the only source of light is from the moon outside, lighting up half the kitchen from the large bay window.
it leaves you both incredibly exposed, anyone from the outside able to see the two seemingly innocent bodies standing toe to toe with each other; but they don’t see the lustful looks and eyes full of desire, both of you so entrapped by the other, it’s obvious with the tension in the air.
“oh, well, then... it’s okay, mr. park,” you say with a smile, taking a step back as your eyes roam his chest one last time. “i didn’t mind.”
you’re about to say goodnight when you see his arm reach out, shocked but oh, so ready ready to give into your desire and feel your body crash against his or your lips connect finally.
moan into his mouth and feel more of his hardness against you - but he only takes the water from your hand, presses his mouth against the plastic rim and swigs down a big gulp.
you watch with wide eyes as his adam’s apple bobs in the moonlight, head tipped back and body perched calmly on the counter as he takes a swig of your water bottle, spit exchanged and his mouth right where yours was.
he pulls back with an unreadable expression, licking the excess water from his lips before simply closing the cap, holding out the bottle and smiling at you with the most wise-ass smirk you’ve ever seen, you’re not sure how you’re ever gonna one up this man.
"sweet dreams, y/n.”
strike 3:
your new years weekend get away turned into an extended stay that consisted of sleeping on a lumpy air mattress, five extra guests and so much alcohol, you’re positive you’re still hungover three days later.
“it wasn’t that... we only did a... i mean it wasn’t like we were....” eunbi says, the two of you laying on her bed nursing headaches and body aches to the severest degree.
“okay, it was pretty bad. we were kind of rowdy and out of control.”
“you don’t say?” you grumble, never one to black out and get that shit faced and then doing it nearly every night - maybe to deal with danny’s pathetic soft looks or whispered sweet nothings to you.
“nothing is working either. not advil or water or greasy food. we might’ve fucked ourselves for life, bi.”
but if there’s one thing that always helped for eunbi, it was a nice, long bath. steaming hot water that burned her skin and the prettiest bath bombs to make the entire bathroom smell of strawberries and cream.
so even though you didn’t want to, nothing more comfortable than eunbi’s king size bed and warm, fluffy comforter, you allowed the girl to drag you to the bathroom down the hall to set up ‘your last resort, hangover paradise.’
it consisted of every type of bath bomb and lotion and bubble bath the luxurious could dream of, sending her out immediately when you saw her sneaking in with a glass of champagne.
“are you crazy?” you ask, dipping your toe in the water to test the temperature. “that’s what started this disaster.”
“fine, more for me!” she squeals happily, turning down the lights and pressing the bluetooth button for your phone’s music. “enjoy. i’ll see you in an hour, completely hangover free.”
“we’ll see about that,” you grumble, your words falling on deaf ears as she locks and closes the door to makes her way back to her ensuite.
and as much as you wanna give eunbi shit for her pompous tactics and techniques for everything in life, you have to say that this is certainly helping.
soaking in the steaming hot water, with cucumbers on your eyes and quiet music playing through the ceiling speakers. the jets in the tub also added another layer of relaxation to it, healing your sore muscles from days of waking up on a hard, wooden floor.
the mirrors were steamed and the room was boiling by the time you got out, stepping on the fuzzy bath mat and drying yourself off with a towel. you had tried not to get your hair wet but it proved useless, your relaxed body sinking further and further down until nearly your whole head was wet.
you stretch your arms above your head as you let out a content groan, feeling the best you’ve felt in three days and ready to take a nap.
but it’s at that moment, looking around the large steaming bathroom, that you realized you didn’t bring a change of clothes in. meaning you’ll know have to walk done the hall and into eunbi’s room in just a towel.
it’s fairly late, almost 11:30, so you’re hoping that her parents are in their rooms and fast asleep by now.
you peak your head out, feeling like a spy in a cheesy action movie as you look up and down the hall. you turn off the light once the coast is clear, walking quietly but quickly down to eunbi’s room - or wing, as it could be considered
you’re almost out of the gate, just a few more steps until you round the corner down eunbi’s hallway, when seonghwa’s tall figure is coming right up the stairs.
his head is down as he looks at his phone, still in his dress shirt and tie from his long day at work. you noticed that after the holidays, he’s been around the house less - working from home when he can but also needing to go into the office more often than not.
he’s at the top of the stairs when he finally notices your figure watching him, wrapped in a towel with a flush on your cheeks and your wet hair dripping on the floor.
it seems to be the thing to break him right now, not able to tear his eyes away or think of any fun, flirty comments to keep you from suppressing the need to roll your eyes.
because his days have been long and stressful and the only thing he needs right now is to just get off - and then there you are like something his prayers have answered, standing there quiet and awestruck at the sight of his loose tie and messy black hair he’s been running his hands through all day.
“h-hi, mr. park,” your quiet voice says, sweet and soft-spoken and utterly apologetic, like you’re embarrassed to be caught in just your towel - and he supposes that would make sense, to feel embarrassed about getting caught like this your friend’s father.
but he can’t find it in himself to care right now, two seconds away from dragging you down to his office so he can finally fuck you over his desk - but he knows that would be the worst decision in the world, for countless reasons.
“hi, y/n,” he grumbles back just as low, leant against the railing with a voice that sounds defeated and gruff.
“are you okay?” you ask, something about his voice and demeanor off.
he has to hold back a strangled laugh, his lips quirking up before he bites down on his lip.
“i’m... i’m fine, thanks. work’s just busy,” he says, a certain part of his chest warming at the fact you even asked - he knows his wife won’t when he walks in their bedroom in a few minutes.
“oh, okay,” you respond, twirling with the end of your towel nervously. “well... i’m sorry to hear that.”
he allows himself to let out a chuckle this time, shaking his head as he looks over your bare, wet face; you’re too pretty for your own good, he’s not even sure you realize just how pretty you are.
just how much he really wants you and just how much he’s coming to like seeing you in his house everyday.
“it’s alright, that’s why you gotta do something you love, right?” he quips, his long fingers up to recreate a camera, pressing down as if to snap a photo.
it cause you to let out a soft, genuine giggle, nodding your head and easing the slight embarrassment of him catching you in a towel.
“right,” you say with a smile, shy smiles and gazes shared until you finally look away in fear of your cheeks warming again.
but it doesn’t stop him from admiring the view of you, your bare face and exposed chest before the towel covers up all the parts he wants to so desperately explore.
he pictures dropping your towel and hearing it fall to the floor with a plop, take in the sight of your perky boobs and hard nipples in the air.
drop his mouth just a little bit to your neck, pressing small kisses against your skin as his fingers knead your nipples, all the quiet moans and breaths to make sure you two don’t get caught shooting right to his cock.
he probably wouldn’t be able to control himself, sliding a finger into you right then and there in the middle of the hallway, pressing your back against the wall to have you trapped against his larger body.
he’d pump his finger in and out of you slowly and tauntingly, hearing how wet you are and feeling how tight you are. it’d be similiar to how this past month has just been both of you taunting and teasing and beating around the bush, occasionally letting his fingers curl to his your g-spot or graze your sensitive clit.
and then he’d drop to his knees to taste you. make sure he sucks and licks and takes your clit in his warm mouth that you’re-
“i should get back to eunbi,” you finally say, breaking the silence and ripping him from his dirty, hidden fantasies. you can’t take the lust and desire in his eyes that you see when he looks at you, an painful ache building between your legs more and more.
“goodnight, mr. park.”
you nearly run into eunbi’s room and slam the door had you not seen her sleeping form, passed out right there in the middle of her bed wearing a baby pink robe.
you look beside her to see an extra one laid out, a silky lilac one that causes a small smile to cross your face.
you’ve never felt material like this on your skin, basking in the feeling of the smooth, silky material as you clean up her room quietly - both to tidy up and distract you from the ache in your legs and last encounter with her father.
for eunbi growing up with housekeepers and nannies her whole life, it always surprised you how clean and tidy your roommate was; the sink was never full of dishes and you alternated vacuuming the living room carpet.
but it’s obvious all of that is a facade because since the moment she got home, her messy ways have shown through - you find it endearing, though, and it’s all very eunbi: a homey, lived in mess of luxurious items and articles of clothing worth more than your childhood home.
the girl in question had moved to the right side in her sleep as you cleaned, a quiet chuckle leaving your mouth. you look to see both your water bottles are empty, deciding on the brave decision to go downstairs to grab two new ones.
the last time you’d done that, you thought for sure mr. park was gonna jump your bones - and you know you were gonna let him.
your mind is littered with memories of that night as you make your way through the dark house of twists and turns, carefully going down the stairs as you walk toward the kitchen.
there’s a room with beautiful double doors on your left, a room you’ve walked past hundreds of times throughout your stay here. eunbi told you it was her dad’s first floor office, where he usually worked and had his meetings from home.
the first thing you notice from down the hall is that the door is slightly cracked open, a peak in from the dimly lit kitchen showcasing some fancy decor of a globe.
as you make your way closer and closer, your ears are met with a quiet, strangled groan that causes you to stop in your tracks; your mind begins to race with a million different scenarios of what you could be walking past right now.
your first thought is that you’re about to see mr. and mrs. park in a very compromising position over his desk - and, as sick as it sounds, as delusional and crazy and absurd as it sounds, that prospect makes your stomach sink and twist painfully.
but that would be normal, you suppose; they’re a fucking married couple after all and seonghwa had seemed stressed from work. obviously he was gonna ask his wife to help calm him down and relax him.
get all of his stress out in the form of-
you shake your head before you can even think about it, forcing your feet to move past the office doors.
and it’s like you can’t even stop yourself from peeking in, confirming to see if your thoughts are correct and you’re about to be gutted, when you take in the sight before you.
seonghwa still in his loose tie and white dress shirt, pants around his ankles and his head thrown back in his office chair as his own hand jerks his cock off.
everything about it is dirty and wrong and you know you shouldn’t be looking in but you can’t stop.
you can’t stop watching the way his hand works around his cock expertly, long and thick and so fucking nice it nearly makes you drool. the thought of you on your knees before him, taking him in your mouth and licking and sucking around the tip, making you bite back a moan.
you can’t stop your eyes from looking at his face, his head thrown back and eyes squeezed shut with his neck on display - perfect for you to bite and give hickies, if you were on top straddling him.
you can’t stop the painful ache and wetness seeping in your thong as you watch him get off, his groans and grunts and heavy breaths making you wanna whine out in arousal.
and it’s that suppression right there, getting so worked up and horny over the sight of your peeping tina activities, that cause you to pull yourself away.
because as much as you don’t want to and as much as you wanna help him, you can’t.
you can only scramble into the kitchen and get water as fast and quiet as humanly possible, scurrying past the office and up the stairs with the stealthiness of a lion.
you can only lay in bed with the thoughts of your roommate’s father and the noises he makes, the sight of his cock and the hand movements replaying over and over in your mind.
and you realize that night, with only a few more days until you both have to leave for the spring semester, you can only hope to never see mr. park again.
let this flirtation and fascination and utterly screwed up infatuation with your roommate’s dad be nothing but a dirty memory you’ll keep to yourself for the rest of your life.
because if it’s not, if you have to see him again and have him in your daily life again, you won’t be able to hold yourself back.
your lust will turn deeper and you’ll find yourself in a much bigger issue than damp underwear and secret, forbidden moments with mr. park seonghwa.
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you should’ve known with only two days left of your stay that eunbi was gonna let the news slip.
you were at least grateful for the fact that mrs. park had a charity ball with her clan of “botox getting, bitchy sounding gold diggers who need to desperately get laid,” successfully riding her of your last friday night dinner.
“so you girls don’t want a new apartment then?” seonghwa asked, glass of wine in his hand as he looks at the two of you questioningly. “that building’s looking for a new owner, eunbi, i think it’d be perfect for you both.”
“dad don’t be ridiculous, we can’t own the building!” eunbi says, swatting her dad playfully as she shovels a piece of food in her mouth. she’s casual and comfortable without her mom’s prying eyes and biting tone, her foot resting on the white fabric beneath her.
“and besides, i might be alone in there soon. we still don’t know if y/n is gonna be starting her-”
you kick the girl under the table roughly, her face pulling into a wince as a cry leaves her mouth.
“ow, y/n! what the he-”
but it’s upon seeing your white face and annoyed expression that she realizes what she said, her mouth falling open and silent as she looks at you apologetically.
“oh shit...”
you can only shoot her a pained, sarcastic smile, daringly looking at seonghwa who’s watching the two of you with a curious expression.
“what do you mean?”
silence hangs in the air, you and eunbi sharing side eyes and dejected looks with her dad before he cocks an eyebrow at the both of you.
“girls... what do you mean?” he asks, his voice deeper and more serious, taking on a dad-like tone eunbi isn’t used to hearing from her relaxed, playful father.
and that’s when, before eunbi can open her big mouth any further, you calmly and regretfully explain the situation with your scholarship.
how you got an e-mail a few months ago about alternate funding for the art department and that you were one of the many students who, while keeping up your end of requirements, could not be awarded money.
“it’s awful that they can do that,” seonghwa says, his eyes full of the same sympathy and outrage eunbi’s held - except he knows that this happens all the time. that it’s unfair and sick and a big ploy in the education system that needs incredible reform.
especially when it hurts students like you.
“yeah but it is what it is,” you say, trying your hardest to steer the conversation to literally anything but this (in fear that you’ll scream or start crying or have yet another anxiety attack).
“i can just finish up in the fall, it’s no big deal,” you lie through our teeth, a sad smile on your face as you look at eunbi. “i’m just sorry it messes up our combined graduation party.”
a frown crosses eunbi’s face as she smacks you in the arm, pulling you closer to her just so she could cuddle herself into your arm.
“i will wait for you,” she proclaims dramatically, a pout on her lips and starry-eyed look in her gaze. “i will wait as long as i have to. if they delay it any further, father, you will simply have to sue the school.”
“father, huh?” seonghwa hums lowly, his lips quirking into a smirk.
father is the term eunbi uses when she wants to use him and his money, whether it be blackmailing unfair teachers or shitty students or calling for him when her and her mom are fighting.
“yes, father,” she says, looking to you with a sweet, apologetic smile on her face.
“i’m serious, y/n. we got your back,” she quips with a wink, a pained smile on your face that she knows means you can’t wait to let her have it when you two are alone.
“you had one job, eunbi, and you were doing so good,” you say in her room later that night, pacing back and forth as she sits on her bed like a scolded child. “literally two nights left and you let it slip out!”
“i’m sorry, okay!” she whines for the ninth time, a pout on her face as she plays with fingers; you wanna roll your eyes seeing it, knowing for a fact that’s something she does when she’s in trouble with jiwoon.
“i didn’t mean to, it just slipped out!” she begins to defend, “and it was only my dad! he wouldn’t dare say a bad word about you, y/n, he loves you.”
you ignore the twinge in your chest when you hear her say those words, feeling a tad guilty at the bodily reaction you have about her own father. how much you’re hiding from her and that you have these suppressed feelings and secret moments in the first place.
“loves me or not, bad word or not, it’s still embarrassing, eunbi,” you say, a frown on your lips as you start to hear the situation aloud. 
“i still can’t pay for my tuition and have to wait almost a whole year to take a degree in fucking photography. like how embarrassing is that, all of this just for me never find a job and live in a box.”
you’ve only seen a flash of anger on eunbi’s face a few times in your life, the incident with the dorm girls and her dad and when a sorority girl tried to kiss jiwoon at the bar.
and you see it right now, her small but mighty frame jumping off the bed and lunging toward you quickly.
“are you kidding me!” she squeals, smacking you in the arm and pushing you down on the bed.
“what the hell do you mean a degree in fucking photography? or living in a box? you’re gonna be the best photographer in the world and shoot every event in my life and charge me quadruple the amount!”
a smile pulls at your lips as you hear her go on and on, hype you up and build up your confidence and tell you to never talk that way about yourself again. how there’s nothing embarrassing about not being able to afford thousands of dollars when you were alerted about the expense on such short notice.
“okay, okay, i know that,” you eventually give in, letting out a sigh as you flop down on her bed. “it’s just.... stressful. i can’t move back home but i also need to get like, a real job. a job that’s gonna pay well so i can save up as much as possible.”
“and we’ll find you that when we get back,” she says, assuring with a confident look in her eye and her hands in yours. “i can promise you, with or without my father’s connections, we’re getting you a job.”
her words prove to reassure you for the remainder of the night, when, after she kisses your ass a little more, asks if she can go to jiwoon’s for a little.
you spent that time in her room looking at nearby job offerings and building up your resume and cover letters, working well into the night hours with a text from jiwoon that she fell asleep and will be back in the morning.
you stretch your arms above your head with a quiet groan, noting it’s almost one o’clock and you’re fucking parched yet again.
it’s no surprise to you when the lights in the kitchen are on, dimly light and no noise around as you pad your way to the fridge.
you almost expect the footsteps that come in a few moments later, when you take a sip from your water and close the fridge without hesitation.
“have you told your parents about tuition?”
you’re confused by the statement that leaves seonghwa’s mouth, brows pulled together and a sinking feeling in your stomach at this conversation again - because as if tuition wasn’t enough, he just had to bring up your parents.
but you don’t wanna beat around the bush any longer; you two seem to do that enough.
“me and my parents don’t talk,” you say, straight forward and quiet as you look right at him.
it’s the first time he sees you look a little broken and defeated, a certain kind of sadness shining behind your eyes that makes him wanna pull him into you. it feels like a protective instinct he’s used to, caring for the people in his life and not wanting to see them struggle.
“they wouldn’t help me anyway.”
this protective instinct feels a little different in this moment, something else tugging in his chest that he hasn’t felt in a very long time - not until he started seeing you more.
“but it’d be a shame if you didn’t finish, y/n. you got so far and you’ve done so well for yourself.”
you smile a little at the praise, tongue rolling over your lips in a way he certainly doesn’t miss - but this moment isn’t about that. it’s not something he cares even a little bit about right now.
“thank you, mr. park, but i am gonna finish,” you say with finality, the confident and sure tone making a strange sort of pride swell inside of him.
“i just have to save up money and i’ll start in the fall. it’s really not that big of a deal,” you tell him with a smile, taking a few steps back so you don’t feel too crowded by him.
“eunbi’s gonna help me look for jobs when i get back,” you say, a teasing smile pulling at your lips as you look at him. “a big girl job. something real and hard, that’s gonna make me super stressed and agitated.”
so much so that i have to get off at the thought of you.
a deep chuckle bubbles out of him that you match with ease, the two of you sharing small smiles and quiet giggles in the middle of this spotless, white kitchen.
“can’t do what you love quite yet, i guess,” seonghwa says, his eyes roaming your face so slowly and carefully, it makes you a tad bit nervous.
you hadn’t realized how natural and easy this conversation was between you two, like you were talking to someone you’d known your whole life opposed to someone you’ve barely known for four years.
his hand itches to reach up and touch your hair, tuck the soft, silky looking strand behind your ear and watch your cheeks heat up when your skin touches; but instead, he smiles down at you, inching closer until he’s just looming over you and staring down at you with a soft, undetectable look in his eye.
“but it’ll be worth it in the end, i think. it’s just gonna... take some time.”
you lick over our lips, throat and mouth suddenly so incredibly dry, as you nod your head.
“yeah, i think so, too,” you say, your lips smushing together nervously before you open your mouth to speak again - this could be one of the last times you’re alone with him.
“thank you for letting me stay with you guys, mr. park. it’s been... really nice spending time with people for the holidays.”
he feels his heart twinge in his chest again, his eyes falling down to your lips and swearing he’s never wanted to kiss someone so bad in his life.  
“of course, y/n, it’s been a pleasure,” he says, a smile quirking at his lips with a hint of something you just can’t quite make out. “maybe we’ll see each other again soon.”
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it was five days before classes started that you got the confirmation e-mail - a message confirming your tuition for the spring semester was paid in full and your current balance was $0.
you had to look over the message for three whole hours making sure you had read the e-mail correctly, even going as far to call the bursar office to make sure they had the correct address.
but they had confirmed with surety that your balance was paid off, urging you to quickly sign up for the classes you need before the day was over.
“okay, you will never believe what interview i was able to score for you,” eunbi says the moment she walks in the apartment, shopping bags up her arm and gucci sunglasses perched atop her head.
“i’ll admit, the vibe was a little off with the coworkers but i think it’d be a great opportunity to-” her eyes catch your laptop screen on the school website, a list of classes and times on your screen that causes her eyes to widen.
“oh?” she squeals, running over and throwing herself down on the couch beside you. “what the heck are you doing? are you... did you...?”
the lie came way too quick and easy to you, excitedly blabbering out that there was a change in the system and your scholarship was approved - “i think they felt bad that i was a graduating senior,” you said, eunbi’s face pulled into the happiest smile you’ve ever seen.
she clapped and danced and bounced around in excitement, proclaiming you guys just had to go out and get drinks to celebrate the fact that your surprise party was back on.
but you could only sit there with your thoughts and suspicions and this overwhelming feeling deep within your stomach that, while eunbi definitely doesn’t know, her father might’ve just paid your college tuition in full.
(part 2)
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thebadboyfanclub · 3 years
Text
You Are My Home (Geralt x Reader)
This was requested by anon. Enjoy!
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The life (y/n) had it was something Geralt often envied, it was a way of living that had nothing to do with him, it was almost like she created her own magical bubble that kept her away from anything harmful, she lived in harmony with everything.
(Y/n) was a farmer's daughter, an only child and her mother passed away when she was young, a few years after she made her first step into adulthood her father also passed, so since she was a little girl her day was filled with taking care of the land and looking after the animals she so much adored. It wasn't the squeezing cow tits and cleaning out the stables that fascinated him, it was the utter bliss you could identify at the twinkle of her eyes, she was in love with her life, the bitterness and greed of the world had graced by her and left her unharmed.
(Y/n) had stumbled across Geralt at the market of the closest town of her home. She sold fruits, milk and vegetables there, still the reason why Geralt noticed wasn't her healthy goods, it was her booming voice as she shouted at a man. 
"If you lay your hands on a child again I will make sure you have no hands to do so!"
As he approached to see what all the fuss was about he saw her. Her hair was nearly pulled back and away from her face, her dress was this beautiful purple color as her hands were on her sides, one breath away from the man's face. Another thing he noticed was the child in question that hid behind her as it clinged on her legs for protection.
"He stole apples from my table"
"You want apples? Here"
She turned and took as many she could hold and started to throw them at the man. He acted out on impulse and stepped in to restrict her, she had a strong fire in her but he would hate to see the obviously taller man harm her.
"That's enough, I think you proved your point"
He said to her as he got in front of her and gently touched her forearms to make her take a few steps back.
"That low life, he almost killed the poor little boy over a few apples"
She muttered as she turned her back on Geralt and kneeled to the kids level. Her hand reached the child's face as she inspected him.
"Are you alright dear? Come with me, I have a bottle of milk for you"
He felt a bit hurt as the girl ignored his presence entirely. As the woman and the child walked over her counter, she instruced the child to sit on the stool as she passed him a bottle of milk. 
The child smiled brightly before chugging the bottle, at that moment of silent Geralt found the courage to speak up.
"I'm Geralt"
"Oh I'm sorry I got completely distracted. I am (y/n), thank you for helping me"
-
After that Geralt felt compelled by her, he would leave her for a short period of time to travel and pick up jobs, yet he always felt the need to come back to her. She was his haven, his safe space to relax, even when compared to him she was this tiny little thing she made him feel protected.
He awoke at the smell of fresh baked goods, he had come to her cottage late at night and exhausted. She only smiled in a sleepy manner and hugged him tight before helping him get into bed with her with no questions or spared words. 
At that time (y/n) walked in the bedroom with a cup in her hand. She was dressed in her white night dress and her hair was down, framing her beautiful face. She sat on his side of the bed as he sat up, the sheets falling from his torso.
"Good morning"
"I believe a good evening is more appropriate. Here, drink this"
She said as she passed the cup to him. (Y/n) loved thyme tea, she always made it for him whenever he came to visit her, the aroma of it made him feel welcomed and now he had linked that smell with her. He remembered how she rambled about how much it helps and nourishes you, he didn't remember what she said exactly but just seeing her so happy and focused on a subject about a simple thing made him smile. 
"Hmmm, what have I done to deserve you?"
He asked before taking a sip of the tea. She giggled at his teasing, he always said that to her, at first she found it funny however she was aware that Geralt thought very low of him, it made her so mad that he didn't see what she was seeing.
"It's the least I could do, you keep us safe"
"It wasn't by choice"
"No one forces you to work Geralt, you go hunting for jobs"
He didn't respond, he was well aware that she had a strong case here. After taking a few sips of the warm liquid he left the cup on the side of his bed before reaching for her hand to caress her soft warm skin. She looked at her hand in his, his skin against hers brought her goosebumps, she tried to hide her smile from him, although Geralt saw it and decided to not comment on it.
"How are things here?"
"Carina gave birth"
"Oh well she was really big last time I saw her"
"She was having a baby cow inside her, I think that's a bit normal"
They had been around enough for her to know what he wanted. She slowly crawled on her side and got under the covers with him, he smiled as he laid back down and rested his head on her breasts while his arms went around her waist bringing her as close as possible. Her fingers went up on his head, slowly caressing his long silver hair she so much adored, for a man that gets covered with monster blood ever so often his hair was soft like silk. 
His warmth made her relax even more as she took a deep inhale and closed her eyes, enjoying his natural scent tingling her nostrils, she never thought a man's smell would bring her such a calm sensation that made her muscles relax completely, the feeling was almost euphoric as she continued to run her fingers through his white mane.
Geralt enjoyed being caressed by her, after years of feeling the touch of a woman only after offering her coins he finally felt he was being cared for, it was something he thought he would never experience. Now here she was making the giant witcher melt in her arms.
"I missed you"
He whispered just enough for her to hear, (y/n) smiled before placing a kiss at the top of his head. Anyone else would laugh at the sight of the big bad witcher snuggling up on a girl and letting her wrap her legs around his torso in order to make him feel protected. She wasn't short but anyone would look small in comparison.
"I missed you too dearest"
Hearing her speak to him in such a delicate and soft way made him feel his stomach twist, in a good way of course. She was what he never knew he missed, she was the warm sun in his gloomy life.
"One day I won't have to leave you"
"One day I will put poison in your tea. Not the deathly kind, maybe paralyze you so you won't be able to leave"
His chest erupted with laughter at her snarky comment, she never phrased her sadness and displeasure when he left her, still he could sense it. It was exactly what he felt so there was a mutual understanding of how much they both hated that departure. He raised his head to look at her as she offered him a warm smile in return
"You are my home"
"Maybe one day my home won't have to slip away from me"
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merakiaes · 3 years
Text
Gentle Blue Eyes - Tommy Shelby
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Pairing: Tommy Shelby x reader
Requested: By @elia-the-bibliophile​
Prompts: None.
Warnings/notes: Mentions of domestic abuse and not wanting to be alive. Not proofread so apologies in advance for any spelling and/or grammar mistakes. Please reblog and comment to keep this blog going and to motivate me to write more fics. 
Wordcount: 6176
Summary: As an heiress from the big city of London, the daughter of a powerful man and wife-to-be of a stranger chosen for you rather than by you, your value as a young lady has always been determined by men. When you decide that you’ve had enough and abandon the life forced upon you, you should’ve known better than to let your guard down, but you couldn’t help it. Luckily, you’ve made new connections and formed new bonds while on the run, with people who would do anything to keep you safe from the people of your past. 
Much like most other women alive in and before your time, your value had been determined by another man all your life.
Your value was not determined by what you accomplished in your life, what good deeds you did your fellow human beings and the world you all lived in, or who you were as a person. Instead, your value was determined by how men depicted you.
From the day you were born and up until your twentieth birthday, your value had been judged depending on how good of a daughter you were to your father.
Did you hold your tongue in situations that tested your patience in order to save him from a public social fiasco, no matter how utterly disgustingly men may have been treating you and talking to you? Did you stand silent and obedient at his side while he introduced you to multiple men of high status and offered them your hand in marriage, no matter how appalling the men in question may have been? Did you follow his every order and instruction on how to please and appeal to the male population of the world, no matter how much you had to violate yourself in order to do so?
Yes, you did. You did all that and a little more like the good, compliant daughter and woman you were. Why? Because you knew that you would always be living in a man’s world, and your parents had both emphasized your entire life what horrible things you might have to endure if you chose to go against the societal stream.
So just like you had done your entire life and been taught to keep doing until the day you died, you brightly smiled and bowed by your knees when your father introduced you to your husband-to-be.
With gentle green eyes, blonde combed-back hair and dimples that could make any girl swoon, he smiled back, bowing his head and placing a kiss on your knuckles; a kiss equally as gentle as his eyes.
For the first time in all your life, you felt as if the stars were finally aligning in your favor, that you would finally be free of your father’s tight grip and allowed to live more freely. Maybe this man would be your savior, you had thought as you stood before him, smiling from ear to ear at his handsomeness and everything but aware that you were looking into the eyes of the devil.
His name was Steven Burton and just like every other man in the world, he was not as gentle as he outwardly seemed.
All your life you’d been taught by your father and mother how to be the perfect wife, how to keep a man pleased and interested. It had been tolerable then. After all, all you’d have to do was smile, nod, agree, and remember their words.
But it was something else entirely to have to live up to those lessons, and even more so to be ordered around by an actual husband. Or well, you weren’t married yet, of course. But you might as well have been, because Steven already acted like he owned you.
And in a sense, you guessed he did. 
Steven and your father had signed on it the day after you’d first met the former, your own parent giving you up to a man he knew wouldn’t be good to you. That’s the first time you really understood that you were more of a mere object in their eyes, less of an actual woman.
But you knew your place and smiled. You smiled through the countless scoldings, and you smiled through the countless slaps and shoves, all of which you’d get even after the smallest of mistakes. Spill an inkling of a drop of tea on the floor, and that’s all that was needed. 
This went on for months while your father and fiancée planned the wedding; you were, of course, not allowed to have a say in any of the arrangements. You were only a woman, after all, and a woman’s job was to stay quiet and fill the needs of her man. Nothing more, nothing less.
The date of your wedding was set to be in the middle of June, in the biggest church in England with more high-up men that you cared to remember the names of. You dreaded it more and more for every day that passed, and when you were only a week away from the set date, you got sick with consumption.
You were on your death bed in a matter of days, not being able to eat, drink, nor properly breathe, and for the first time in a long time, as you laid in your bed staring into the ceiling with your mother by your side, you smiled sincerely with only one thought running through your head.
Finally.
You thought that you’d finally be free of the men in your life, free to live your own way in heaven, because you had done everything right in your lifetime, lived every day according to the bible. You knew that you’d be deserving of a place up in paradise and you knew that things up there couldn’t be like how they were down on Earth, because this life you were living… Well, it was nothing short of hell, so even death would be preferred. 
But by miracle, just as you’d made your peace, just as you realized you were ready to go, you started to get better. And you found yourself crying, mourning, over the fact that you didn’t die, and it was only then that you realized how truly horrible it was.
How horrible it was that you considered yourself lucky for getting as sick as you did because you’d rather lay on your deathbed and never see the light of day again than marry the man you had been promised to.
All your life, your value as a woman had been determined by how other men depicted you. From birth until the end of your teens, you were judged on how good a daughter you were to your father. Now, you were being judged on how good of a wife you were to your husband and soon enough, you would be judged on how good of a mother you were to your children.
You realized that as long as you stayed there, with your family, your value as a woman would never be determined by yourself as a person. You’d never even get to be your own person, as long as someone else was pulling the strings and making every decision for you.
So you did what you had never, in your entire life, done before; you abandoned your womanly obligations and responsibilities, vowed to never stay silent at the order of a man again, and ran.
You ran from one place to another, to another, to another, for longer than you could keep track of, taking more names than you could count, hiding from your father and fiancée’s spies that you knew couldn’t be far behind while simultaneously searching for your place in the world.
Where exactly a woman of such high status as yourself would end up, you had no idea. But the last place you’d ever see yourself was as a barmaid in the slums of Small Heath, Birmingham. And yet, that’s where you ended up.
You took the name Evelynn Bailey the second you crossed the invisible border of Small Heath, just like you’d taken other names for every other place you had settled down for various periods of time.
Harry, the bartender of the local pub called The Garrison Pub, greeted you as you entered for the first time, politely asking you how he could be of assistance.
You still knew one thing for sure after being on the run from your family for so long and that was that you were still just a woman living in a man’s world. But another thing you had quickly come to learn after leaving home was that, although still sexist and misogynistic on various levels, a lot of men saw women as more than just man-pleasers. They saw them as people.
You had run into a lot of men during the time you’d spend on your own, and not even the bad ones were as bad as the men you had grown up with had been. More and more you realized that the riches your family sat on just had to have been a contributing factor to the way they’d always felt like the world, especially women, owed the something.
Harry was one of the good ones, you knew that as soon as he met you with a smile. So you didn’t waste any time in asking him what you came to ask. Harry was hesitant, saying that he’d love to help you out and offer you a job as a barmaid, but you were just… too beautiful.
At that point, you’d already come to terms with the fact that your father and fiancée had been more extreme than most, and told Harry that you could handle any man in the bar, should anyone ever give you any trouble.
And that was it. He agreed to a trial night and everything went smoothly.
Who would’ve thought a shy little bird such as yourself could have social skills good enough to have every man in the pub up on their feet and singing within the first hour? Not you, that’s for sure. And yet, that’s what the Shelby clan was welcomed with when they first came to join the party that night.
All of their eyes found you immediately, laughing and singing and being spun around by Jeremiah Jesus as well as one could be spun in the small space behind the bar. 
You had never gotten to let loose like this in your entire life and Tommy knew that the second he saw the way your face lit up.
For a woman to be that comfortable and off-guard in a room full of drunk men, she’d couldn’t have lived an easy life, he realized, and was instantly drawn to you like a moth to a light, fascinated by the fact that you could still be so sweet and gentle after obviously having gone through hell.
So Tommy did with you what he hadn’t done with any woman since the death of his lover before the war; he got emotionally involved and, eventually, emotionally attached.
It quickly became apparent that the two of you were a lot alike, and the other members of the Shelby family could see immediately that you would be special. It, also, became apparent quickly that you were a big potential asset to the Peaky Blinders.
If there was one positive thing about having had to follow your dad and fiancé around without ever being allowed to say a word, it was that you had become pretty good at being invisible. 
Most of the time, they would never even notice you were there and so, you had learned a lot about different businesses, big and successful as well as small and aspiring ones, and how to guarantee success in deals through eavesdropping. Although, it could hardly be called eavesdropping. You had always been there, out in the open; it wasn’t your fault that they’d never noticed you.
Either way, it was quickly discovered that you had a knack for blending in and, through that, getting the gossip; not only in the way that you were incredibly inviting, resulting in a lot of men willingly spilling their life stories to you after one too many drinks at the bar, but also because they’d, a lot of the times, not even notice you were there. And even if they did, what harm could a pretty little barmaid do?
You helped to get Tommy tips for business as well as discussing potential partners based on what you’d heard both in the pub and out on the street, and the two of you helped each other through your company, never going a day without long, deep conversations.
Tommy felt so at ease around you and so easily opened up to you about the things that he had seen and been through that, for a moment, he forgot that you had originally come from somewhere else from which you probably carried heavy baggage, that he’d at some point have to partake in the unpacking of. And for a moment, you did, too.
You should’ve known better, after spending that much time on the run from those who wanted to keep you caged; figuratively and possibly even literally, but for the first time in your life, you had gotten so comfortable that you finally dared put down your walls and let the past go.
And you should’ve known better.
It was early Saturday morning and just like every other day, you found yourself alone in the Garrison, organizing, cleaning, and everything in between in preparation for the crowd that was sure to gather in the pub as the afternoon rolled around.
Cleaning and wiping down the mugs and glasses was always the first thing you did when coming in to work, just in case someone came in needing a drink before the real festivities began, so at the moment, you were in the back unpacking the delivery of whiskey and gin that you’d gotten the evening before.
It was no easy work carrying the boxes inside from the alley when you’d had no experience in life that had allowed you to build any kind of muscle, but you were a determined woman and didn’t mind breaking a bit of a sweat. 
But even so, as you were just carrying the final crate of bottles inside, you were grateful to hear the bar-bell ring. Once, twice, and then thrice.
What Arthur had been thinking when he brought in that damned bell, you didn’t know. The drunken men coming in every day and continuously ringing the bell for refills or just to get your attention in order to make a move on you was one thing, but the kids who had been running in and out ringing it endlessly since it got brought in was something else entirely.
So, it was safe to say that you’d developed a kind of love-hate relationship with the dinging piece of metal, but right at this moment, it had never sounded as sweetly as it did.
“I’ll be right there!” You called back to the person waiting, and carefully put the crate of bottles down on the floor.
You blew on a strand of hair that had fallen out of your bun to get it out of your face and wasted no time in making a beeline for the doorway, all while wiping your dirty hands on the apron tied around your waist.
Stepping through the doorway behind the bar, you instantly spotted the form of a man, dressed in expensive-looking clothing and standing with his back turned to you, hiding his face from your view.
You unwrapped the dirty apron from around you and grabbed a clean one from underneath the bar, put on a bright smile, and approached the man.
“I’m sorry for the wait. What can I do you for?”
The words that you’d spoken so many times before fell effortlessly from your lips, with an even more effortless kindness.
But the second the man turned around, revealing his face, you froze. Your blood felt like lead in your veins, weighing every part of you down. Every finger, every toe, every strand of hair even though they didn’t even contain veins, suddenly felt twenty pounds heavier, and suddenly, not even breathing came without effort anymore.
"Hello, (Y/N). Long time no see wouldn’t you say?"
At the sound of his voice, you snapped back to reality again and immediately spun around, wasting no time in heading back for the door to the alley. 
But he was fast, strong, everything you weren’t, and circled around the bar and caught your wrist before you’d even gotten the chance to blink.
Your head whipped around and with newfound strength, you glared. You glared up into those monstrous green eyes and tugged on your arm.
“Let. Me. Go.” You demanded with every pull, glare never faltering, but to no avail. The grip he had on you only tightened.
“You didn’t think you could hide from me forever, did you?” He questioned with an amused laugh. “You silly girl.” 
It was only when his hand came up to your face that you broke eye contact, turning your head to the side in an attempt to get away from his touch as his fingers made contact with your hair. 
But again, it was to no avail. He had you in a grip so tight that you couldn’t move an inch, and his hand soon enough made contact with your cheek; calloused and rough, against silky soft.
“Please, Steven.” Your breath shook as you spoke. “You fought in the war, you got awarded medals for your bravery and honor. You can still do the right thing.”
“And what would that be?” He quirked an eyebrow and moved his face close to yours. “Let you stay here, in the slums? Hm? No, this is no place for a lady.”
You flinched at the feeling of his breath fanning across your face. “I’ve finally found my place. I finally feel like I belong.” You kept fighting back with your words, but your body was already giving in, your wrists turning limp in the grips of his hands. 
“You belong with me.” He spat and in quick movements raised a hand to turn your head, forcing you to look at him and once again making you flinch. “What other place could a woman like you have in the world?” He continued, voice now lower as he gently tucked a strand of your hair behind your ear.
You shivered at the feeling and thanked the gods of all existing religions when hearing the front door open.
As an immediate response, Steven’s grip on you tightened and you closed your eyes while his head whipped around to face whoever had just entered the pub. 
You, on the other hand, didn’t even need to look to know who it was, recognizing the sound of his steps, the smell of his cologne, and the sensation of his mere presence immediately.
There was a moment of thick silence, and then...
"What’s going on here?" The voice of Tommy Shelby reached your ears, his thick accent sounding like the sweetest music you’d ever heard.
You let out a short breath of relief. 
“None of your business, that’s what’s going on. We’re having a private conversation so you can see yourself out the way you came in and come back when we’re gone.” Steve immediately fought back and quickly, you whipped your head around to face him. 
“Steven.” You warned in a whisper, shaking your head lightly and giving him a pointed look when he turned to meet your eyes.
You knew fully well what Tommy was capable of and while you wouldn’t mind the man next to you being beaten to a bloody pulp, you’d much rather not be present to witness that happen. 
"Evelynn?" Tommy’s voice came again and only then did you turn to look at him, meeting his eyes where he still stood still right in front of the doorway. 
“Do you know this man?” He continued in asking, eyebrows raised in a way that showed he was clearly ready to jump him if you so wished.
But rather than encouraging just that, you simply nodded your head, eyes flickering between the two men while one tightened his grip on you in a warning, and the other slowly moved closer in protective caution.
No more words got to be shared between the three of you before the door opened again, Arthur, John and a few of the other Peaky Blinders stepping inside, to a start full of chatter and banter, but everyone falling silent when catching on to the tense atmosphere in the room.  
Arthur looked at Tommy, then at you, then at Steven, then at you, and then at Tommy again. “We got a problem in here, Tommy?” He asked his younger brother before turning to give Steven a suspicious eye. "Who are you?"
"Who the fuck are all of you?" Steven shot back without missing a beat.
“We’re the Peaky fookin’ Blinders.” Arthur glared. “This is my pub, and we all happen to hold the women you’re currently threatening very close to heart, so I’d watch my tone if I were you, boy.”
“I’m not threatening anyone.” Steven glared defensively, but the increasingly tightening grip he had on your wrist said otherwise, as did the flinch that followed as a result.
Perceptive as he was, Arthur noticed this immediately, but so did Tommy, and the latter was much quicker to respond to it.
“Really now?” He raised his eyebrows in question, giving the man next to you a good, long stare before turning to John. “Does she look like she’s enjoying herself to you, John?”
“Not in one bit, Tommy.” John, who had been standing by in silence with his eyes narrowed to slits, spoke, and Tommy turned back to the two of you.
“No, she doesn’t.” He repeated. “So why don’t you do yourself a favor and tell us who the fook you are so we can resolve this before any blood is spilled, yeah?”
Steven met your eyes with a warning glare, a glare that said: “be quiet, or else”, before he finally let go of your wrist.
You immediately hurried to cover the bruised skin with the sleeve of your shirt and stepped back, while Steven took a step forward.
“I'm her fiancé.” He said. “And I’m here to take her back home.”
“Fiancé?”
An unreadable expression swept over Tommy’s face for a moment and his eyes flickered to meet yours at the sound of the words. But he quickly regained his composure, straightening his face.
"That’s funny. She never mentioned a fiancé.”
As you glanced up at him, Tommy’s eyes looked nearly dead, his usually vibrant irises looking dull, and you felt a pang of guilt in your chest knowing that your lies were to blame.
“I can imagine.” Steven chuckled back, suddenly acting friendly. “She does have a tendency to lie. A bit of a pathological liar, this one.”
You had to clench your fists in order to not exclaim in protest at the sound of his poor-tasted and not at all accurate joke. Luckily, Tommy was a smart man, smarter than any other man you’d ever met, and didn’t meet Steven’s deceitful humor with even a hundredth of the same enthusiasm.
“I know a liar when I see one, and she isn’t one. You on the other hand…” Was the only thing he said back, and you felt relief flood your entire body at the realization that he wasn’t angry at you.
Steven picked up on the hidden support, as well, and quickly returned to his previous demeanor. “She’s not who she says she is.”
“Is anyone?” Tommy simply raised an eyebrow, the corner of his lip turning upwards every so slightly.
His eyes flickered to meet yours for a tenth of a second, just long enough for you to notice the humorous spark behind them, and for Steven to remain oblivious.
“I’m not here to cause any trouble.” The man in question insisted. “I just think you should know the truth about her, that’s all.”
“And what truth would that be?” Tommy kept playing along, clearly finding it amusing that the other man still thought that he’d be able to win with his poor excuses and made-up explanations.
The man in question, however, clearly wasn’t as smart and perceptive as he always made himself out to be, as he had yet to pick up on the fact that the only reason he was still standing inside the pub, was because Tommy was enjoying messing with him.
“Well, I don’t know what made-up alias she’s given you and claimed to be, but her name, her real name, is (Y/N) (Y/L/N), and her parents have been forced to put up with her crazy behavior her entire life.” He explained. “She’s a bit unstable and acts out when she doesn’t get her way, that’s all, and I just came here to take her back to London on their orders. So I’m going to do that and be out of your hair, and you have my word that you won’t have to see her again. This isn’t the first time she’s run away, but it will be the last.”
Your blood boiled when listening to him spew out lie after lie and yet, you couldn’t bring yourself to react with anything other than shame.
Tommy watched as you lowered your head and started down into the floor, before turning back to the man at your side.
“Is that supposed to reassure me?” He asked, all of the play now gone and, finally, Steven seemed to come to the realization that they weren’t being fooled.
One after the other, Steven let his eyes inspect his audience. First Tommy and then on to Arthur, John, and the handful of Peaky Blinders; he met the eyes of every man in the room and was met with only glares. Glares that were getting fiercer and more impatient by the second.  
So finally, he stepped back, and looked down at you.
“We’re leaving, now.” He ordered, but the second his hand reconnected with your wrist, Arthur and John stepped forward with their guns already held in front of them, the latter roughly shoving the barrel into the back of Steven’s head.
The other Blinders quickly followed suit, keeping some distance, but providing protection nonetheless.
Tommy, on the other hand, didn’t need a weapon. The power he radiated with every step as he moved towards you at an antagonizing pace was more than enough to make Steven’s composure falter.
Clasping his hands behind his back, Tommy came to a stop right in front of you, and gave Steven the most dangerous look you’d ever seen a man give another, speaking: “I’m afraid I can’t let you do that.”
The tone of his voice alone was enough to send shivers back your spine.
“You and your jolly band of gangsters don’t scare me, so get out of our way. I’m taking her back to where she belongs, even if I have to fight my way through the lot of you to do so.”
Stephen’s voice was strong and confident, but his eyes, and the way his grip on your hand faltered, contradicted the power behind his words.
“She belongs, where she wants to be, and it looks to me like you’re the last person on earth that she’d want to be stuck with.” Tommy was beginning to lose his poker face, that much was clear judging by the way his eyes got progressively angrier.
In return to this, Steven only got more persistent, squaring his shoulders and narrowing his eyes. “She doesn’t know what she wants. Like I told you, she’s unwell.” He spat. “She knows that the best place for her to be is at home with me and her parents. Go on, tell them.”
He turned to you. 
Surprised, your eyes flickered up to meet his and you saw it immediately: he was scared, and he was angry and humiliated about being put in that position. If you went with him now, you didn’t know what would happen to you.
“(Y/N).” Tommy called.
It was weird hearing him speak your real name, and even weirder to hear it spoken so softly; as if you hadn’t lied to him and his family about who you were for the past month.
You turned to look at him slowly, and he met you not with the anger and impatience he had been showing toward Steven only a second before, but with a genuinely caring gaze as he asked, “Do you want him to stay?”
Your heart was pounding in your chest, anxiety rising and getting stuck in your throat. You knew that he already knew the answer, and you knew that he would protect you as well as the fact that Steven wouldn’t stand a chance against all of them in his lonesome.
But still, your hands shook as you allowed your eyes to flicker to meet Steven’s only to be met with a discrete, pointed glare, and yet, you didn’t dare say a word, only quietly shaking your head “no”.
“Okay.” Tommy replied and held your eyes. “Do you want to go with him?”
“No.” You didn’t hesitate this time, the simple but oh, so heavy word falling from your lips in a breath. 
Tommy nodded again and turned back to the man beside you, who was now fuming and refusing to look away from you. You could feel his eyes burning holes into the side of your face, but you said nothing.
“Well, then I think it’s time for you to go. And you, alone.”
“This is not your business to be meddling with.” The heat of Steven’s glare disappeared when he whipped his head to face his opponent.
He hissed the word like a snake and took a threatening step in Tommy’s direction. As to be expected, Tommy didn’t budge. 
“She’s a part of this business, a part of this family.” He simply replied, prompting you to look up slowly. “That makes it my business and gives me the right to meddle however much I want. She’s only been here for a short period of time but over that time, I’ve gotten to know her well enough to know that she’s not the crazy one here. She’s family, and if you mess with one of us, you mess with all of us.”
To prove the truth and sincerity behind the last part, everyone took a step closer, closing Steven in like prey.
At this point, when seeing Steven cornered and confusedly looking around for a way out, you finally managed to gather the courage that you needed in order to push past the man in question and take the empty space beside Tommy, instead.
Tommy instinctively pushed you a little bit behind him, hiding you away from Steven’s sight as well as putting you out of reach.
“Now, because I’m feeling unusually generous today, I’m going to give you two options.” He then proceeded to speak, raising his eyebrows. “Either you see yourself out of my pub and never come back, or I’ll have my men escort you out. And that, I can assure you, will not be pleasant.”
“You’re making a mistake.” Steven attempted to step closer to you, but was immediately shot down as John and Arthur stepped closer.
“Okay, okay. I’m leaving.” Steven put his hands up and backed up again.
Tommy gave the Blinders a simple nod and they immediately began backing up, clearing a straight path for the front door.
“For your sake, I hope neither you nor her parents make another attempt to come to get her back or contact her in any way. She’s one of us now, and we take protecting our family very seriously.” Keeping his stare unwavering, Tommy spoke his final words of warning.
Steven spared the two of you one last look, clenched his jaw, and then he was gone, followed closely by the Blinders who stayed close to the door after his departure, while Tommy took your shoulder and gently guided you further into the pub.
With the storm now blown over, you were left standing still and silent in shame, arms self-consciously wrapped around yourself.
“Are you alright?” Tommy wasted no time in asking, voice low enough only for you to hear.
He bowed his head down in search of your eyes and after a moment of silence, you slowly raised them to meet his. “Yes. Thank you.”
A crease formed between his eyebrows, but it was gone just as quickly as it had gotten there.
“I don’t believe we’ve been properly introduced. (Y/N) (Y/L/N), was it?” He lightly smiled. 
All you could do was smile back while nodding your head. “Yeah.”
“A beautiful name for a beautiful woman.” He mumbled, slowly reaching his hand up to tuck a strand of your hair behind your ear, just like Steven had done minutes before.
Unlike when the latter had been the one behind the action, your stomach turned with excitement and contentment, rather than fear and disgust, at the feeling of calloused fingertips brushing against the soft skin of your cheek.
You closed your eyes for a short moment, basking in the feeling, but opened them again shortly after and furrowed your eyebrows. 
“I’m sorry. For lying to you and for all of this. I completely understand if you-“
“We all have things in our past that we no longer want to be a part of our lives and there will come a time, for all of us, when we need to start fresh.” Tommy didn’t even allow you to finish your sentence.
He pressed his entire palm against the side of your face with a gentleness you’d never gotten to experience personally; you’d only ever seen that kind of emotion be showed to other people, strangers on the streets whom you had always envied. 
Your eyes automatically closed at the feeling, but Tommy quickly urged you to open them again with a soft sweep of his thumb over your eyelid.
Letting them flicker open, you met his eyes, and with the most sincerity he had ever spoken in before, he said: “I don’t care about who you used to be. I only care about who you are, here and now…”
That sentence alone was enough to flip your stomach upside down. No matter how much you tried to contain your happiness, you couldn’t hold back the big smile that overtook your features and before you knew it, his lips were on yours.
His hand left the side of your face, slowly sliding down your neck and shoulder to stop at your upper arm, where he rubbed soothingly slow circles with his thumb. Eyes closed and hearts beating hard, the kiss was short but satisfactory nonetheless, the two of you coming apart with parted lips and spinning heads. 
You stood in silence for a short moment, before he let out a slow breath, once again getting serious.
“Did he hurt you?” He asked quietly, genuinely, caringly, and while asking the question, he reached for your hands, accidentally putting pressure on the darkening bruises.
Before you could help yourself, you flinched, and he instantly reacted by looking down and carefully pushing up your sleeve.
You watched his face turn from one of genuine concern to burning rage at the sight of the purple and blue skin that had previously been hidden from sight by the lettuce edge hem of your sleeve.
He let his fingers hover above it but in the end, he didn’t touch the mark again, instead softly dropping your hand, erasing all anger from his face and taking your face between his hands.  
“No more secrets from now on, eh?” He joked with a smile, and although you knew he was upset, you smiled back, nodding your head.
“No more secrets.”
“Good.” 
You remained standing there for another few second before he leaned up to press a kiss to your forehead. 
“Put some ice on your wrist and take the rest of the day off. I’ll come by your house later and we’ll talk.” He mumbled against your skin.
You replied with a nod once he pulled away again, and with one last shared glance watched him turn around and head for the door, where the others were still patiently waiting, murmuring among themselves presumably to give you the privacy you needed.
The second he turned away from you, his rage returned, as he marched across the room rather than walk the way he normally did.
“I want all of you to keep an eye out for that man. If he sets his foot on Small Heath soil again, you bring him to me.” Was the last that you heard before the door slammed shut behind them. 
As they turned a corner some way down the street, they disappeared from your view, and left you in your lonesome to think about those gentle, blue eyes.
Tagged: @lucillethings @marvelously-flawed​ @springsoulofengland @lovelynervouskingdom @vintagedaydreams​ @caelys @thesassmisstress
(If you want to be added or removed from the tag list, send me a message, ask or leave a comment)
(I noticed that a lot of people have either changed their usernames or removed their accounts since the last time I posted a Peaky Blinders fic, because I can’t get the tags to work and also can’t find the blogs. So if thelonewolfdies, knrivera16, peakyhermione and fanficflaneuse see this and still wants to be tagged, let me know and I’ll write up your new username if you’ve changed them. Of course, newcomers are also welcome to join my tag-lists. Comment and reblog! <3)
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loveanoutcast · 3 years
Note
ok but I read games and I am ADDICTED and I just thought I could maybe request something like-
Eren meeting the reader through a simple comment and a timeskip to them being v close until they eventually end up in a fight because reader was ranting to eren about how perfect their crush (who is actually eren) is and him just exploding and them getting into a fight until the reader eventually goes "that person is you, dumbass!" Or smth like that and from there it all just turns into a lot of kisses and smut👀
only if you're comfy/in the mood of writing smth like this tho! just had this random thought last night and thought I'd request a little erenxfembodiedreader
Anyway have a nice day, night, afternoon, morning, you're amazing :D
Oh my gosh, this is my first request ever and I am so incredibly excited to write this and I really hope I did good in writing something you would want. Thank you so much for submitting this request, please feel free to send more! I love writing fanfics of any aot character and will do my absolute best to embody them in these. Sorry for the long wait, when I say the last chapter had me all the way FUCK3D up. EreMika is canon and I haven't been able to stop saying "He loved her, oh my god he loved her" in that "and they were roommates" vine way because that's my coping mechanism and it's cheaper than therapy. Anyway, I give you-
"Assumptions."
Pairing: Eren Yeager x Fem!reader
TW: nsfw, smut, angst, jealously, swearing, yelling, a bit of fluff, unprotected intercourse, breeding kink, a bit of voyeurism, a bit of sexism, eren being denser than a rock, Levi having health issues because he's old
Other: aot world if the mess of season four never happened and eren didn't fall to sad bitch hours, reader is a regular girl with family issues, all characters are over 18, Erwin never died and Floch never went insane
It wasn't that Eren hated going into town, but he wasn't exactly used to going to town alone. He always had Mikasa and Armin flanking either side of him but since the discovery of the world outside the walls and the decreased threat of titans, scouts were needed more than ever in the recovery of the lost districts. Mikasa was the second strongest soldier alive and Armin was expected to take after Erwin. Eren was useful when it came to being the one who possessed the attack and founder titan, but lately there was no big threats that required his titan abilities.
That didn't stop Hange from poking him, nor did it stop Captain Levi from keeping him busy with even the most minimalist of tasks. Today was no different and when the options were given to him and Jean, who was still asleep in his bunker, on shoveling horse shit or going into town to stock up on supplies and check to ensure all market suppliers weren't being capitalist pigs to the local vendors, Eren all but hauled ass through the door, hand swiping the grocery list off the table and yelling, "Good luck Jean-boy!"
Everything seemed to be going just fine, none of the local vendors had any troubles and most seemed happier with the drastic improvements of the living situations for Eldians. The fear of being eaten any day now or losing a loved one to war had seemed to be the driving force that had led to problems before. Some people recognized Eren, but no one seemed to want to approach him. He had had encounters with people who thought of him as a god, but he usually ignored them or kept a level-headed composure. Despite knowing that he had a power no one else had, outside of being a titan-shifter, Eren didn't really know what he had to offer. Armin was smart, Mikasa was strong, and he couldn't exactly claim titan-shifter seeing that Armin was also the colossal and Ymir had been the jaw.
He let out a sigh, kicking a rock in his path and silently yearning for something beyond his knowledge. Despite knowing that he was never really alone, he felt lonely a lot of the time. He had never given much thought to settling down, with the clock running out on him he often thought what was even the point? He wasn't sure if he wanted to keep being a soldier or if he wanted to go back home one day, he didn't really try to dwell on the future, content with being in the present and having Mikasa always on the verge of tears when she was reminded that he would one day die, didn't really give him room to think of much else.
You weren't oblivious to the tales and rumors that went around the town about the scouts and their secret weapon in the form of a shapeshifting man and how him and his comrades were able to plug the hole in the wall of a district your family had come from long ago. Your father had long since escaped the walls of Maria before it fell, he made an honest living being a construction man, and your mother was a nurse who happened to catch his eye when he had a roofing accident. They built a life for themselves within Wall Rose. You weren't the richest family, nor did you have a name that was well known. Nonetheless, you were all hard working. Your brothers worked for the respect they got, one being a weapon maker and the other being a bar keeper was enough for the part of town you were in. Even their wives did well for themselves in being a seamstress and bar waitress. As the youngest, you were loved and cared for. You weren't the most beautiful girl in town, but you turned heads nonetheless, well until one of your brothers decided to glare or promptly hit whoever doted on you too long for their liking.
The people who knew you, thought you were trouble. Mostly the elders spewed of you and your ways of thinking being a disgrace to everything Eldians stood for and bringing only shame to your gender, you were a woman ahead of her time and they couldn't stand it. Like your mother you had entered the medical field, but even when you were small you claimed you would be a doctor one day. You shadowed and worked under the supervision of the town's doctors. Many amused at your antics, some who didn't care about you being a girl and just grateful to leave such responsibility on someone who was genuine in the intent, and others not caring one way or another and not willing to hear your screeching pleads to observe what they did. Your mom had spoken with you more than once about settling with being a doctor's aide, today being no different and you let out a sigh as you looked to your mother's pained expression.
"I just don't understand why you insist on making your life so difficult? It was bad enough when you proudly exclaimed your goals in front of the entire church, but now this?"
You could only look away, looking towards the fields where you saw your third brother grooming the horses. You hadn't said anything bad, you were approached with a job offer that would give you the title and respect you had been desperately craving, and it would bring greater honor to your family...or so you thought before your mother reacted the opposite in which you hoped.
"I will not have any daughter of mine chasing dreams and fantasies off in some other place where no one can protect you. This is a suicide mission and I for one will not stand by and watch you march forward to your downfall."
Your father stood behind your mother, not really saying anything and not even looking at you. You felt especially bad for the commander and captain who stood on either side of you and were bearing witness to the absurd exchange between your family.
"Mrs. Y/L/N, you have to know that if Y/N were to accept this offer, she would never be in the front lines. We have bases located all throughout the walls and she would do what she did best and be our primary doctor." Commander Erwin spoke with such calm words, his demeanor kind and patient.
"So you expect me to let her run off with a bunch of men whose brains are broken from the wars they fought and not worry? She is not even married!"
You grit your teeth so hard upon hearing that, you were sick of the standards put forth on you since your birth. You were sick of the expectations you were in no hurry to reach and you were especially tired of the lack of faith your family had in you to be independent and strong. Your fists clenched and you felt a steady gaze on you.
"I'm not an expert or anything on parenting, nor will I act as if I am, but instead of yelling at her, why don't you try asking your daughter what she wants to do?" You didn't silence the gasp you released, looking at Captain Levi in confusion and admiration.
All eyes turned to you, your mother crossing her arms as if asking you to try and defy her. Erwin looked a bit expectedly and Levi looking indifferent to the entire conversation. It was your father who beat you to it before you could even open your mouth to answer.
"You have a choice, my daughter. If you choose to stay, you'll make your mother and brothers happy. You can continue to help people but you will never be acknowledged as a doctor...but you'll have your family. Or you can choose to leave and live your life to your own accord, but you will lose the respect of the town and your mother will never speak to you again. Are you willing to put yourself above your family?" You expected this from your father, always neutral and never judgmental, what he was saying was true after all. Were you willing to lose your family over your dreams? Would you be able to survive on your own with only the scouts to rely on?
Your head was hurting and your frustration only grew when your brothers decided to come home and after your mother wailing at them about your plans to leave, they were quick to overwhelm you with their own opinions. The commander and captain apologized but they had to leave and return to headquarters.
"Take your time on making your decision. We will come back in a few days for your answer." Commander Erwin told you, giving you a smile as he continued, "I know its a lot to ask you to choose us over your flesh and blood, but if you do. You have my promise that we will protect you, and we may never be able to fully replace your family in your heart, but the scouts will be a family on its own for you."
"Tch," Captain Levi shook his head, "Look brat, you will see and do things that you won't always like. People will die no matter how hard you try to save them, but call Erwin and Hange delusional--they see something in you. Don't walk into this half-assed, if you choose to be our doctor and you choose to take on the title and everything it carries with it, you have to dedicate your heart."
You only nodded. Two days had passed as you walked through the market, the small basket in your hands carried apples and some citrus fruits. Your mother still wasn't talking to you and your brothers seemingly assumed you wouldn't be leaving, only your father knew how frantic your mind was, and one morning he admitted that he would be delighted to have at least one of his children carry the family name on a military standing. So you had his support.
You even spoke to the animal doctor you had been shadowing for the past few weeks, his eyebrows had rose in an impressed matter and he promptly asked when you would be leaving.
"I haven't made a decision, yet." You said.
"You would be an idiot not to take it." Was all he replied before asking you to give the cattle their medicine.
Idiot, huh? You wondered. You knew deep down he was right. Your mind continued to play in endless loops of thought before you heard a commotion to your right. Turning your head you saw a group of men, their huddling seemed a bit more frantic and it was not until one of them yelled that you noticed one man in particular on his knees.
"Help! Someone call a doctor!"
The man on the floor was bleeding rather profusely and you didn't have time to question what happened before you quickly made way.
"Sir, let me see."
"Hey! Woman don't touch him!"
"Make yourself useful and go get a doctor! What the hell do you think you're doing!"
"I am a doctor." You calmly said, inspecting the gash on his side and seeing the edge of what appeared to be a broken pipe sticking out from the building behind them. The drips if bloods glistening in the sun only confirmed what you thought.
"We were-" The injured man rasped out, "Just horsing around."
"It's okay." You reassured, grabbing a roll of gauze and stack of medical napkins you always kept in your basket. You apologized before applying pressure to the wound, and you heard the patter of rushing feet.
"A doctor is on his way! A real one!" One of the men sneered, and you did your best not to roll your eyes and focus on stopping the bleeding. You asked the man to lie on his back and he surprisingly complied, he didn't seem to care about you being a girl and only seemed thankful to not be alone and scared.
"Do you hear that? Move before you kill him!" The first man hollered, the hand on your shoulder causing you to sharply inhale.
"Excuse me for one moment." You told the man, and you were quick as you hand shot up to grip the disrespectful ass by his wrist and twist it in one fluid motion, you wasted no time in using the building wall as leverage, quickly running up and using his weight to stabilize yourself before you roundhouse kicked him so hard it sent both of you flying back. You landed on one foot, balancing yourself before going back to the patient.
You couldn't deny how satisfying it was to hear the impact, or the groan of pain coming from him. Your eyes met the others.
"If any of you touch me, I'll do exactly what I did to your buddy there, but ten times worse. Now shut the hell up and let me save this man."
Eyes widely stared at you as you resumed caring for the injured, a few minutes passed by the time the doctor got there.
"Oh!" His eyebrows rose, "Hello Y/N, didn't expect to see you here. If I would have known, I wouldn't have left the hospital on its own."
"Hi Dr. Goodwin," You looked up, two fingers on the injured man's wrist and the other held up four fingers from your counting. You blushed slightly from his confidence in you and you noticed the men who bullied you all sport faces of confusion.
"His pulse is stable. I wrapped the wound tightly, but he needs stitches."
"Thank you, miss." The injured man grabbed your hand and you smiled in return.
"Don't mention it."
"Actually, it's Dr. Y/L/N." Dr. Goodwin said, seeing your eyes widen and the smile he gave only made your heart swell that much more.
The doctor nodded, thanking you before asking his helpers to load him to the small gurney they brought. He could only thank you briefly before you waved them off. The other guys had stayed back, eyes wide in disbelief that the doctor not only recognized you, but acknowledged your work.
"Are you a nurse or something?"
"Are you morons deaf? Did you not hear Dr. Goodwin? I'm a doctor too."
The leader seemed to recover from the kick you gave him earlier as his lip curled in an ugly matter, "What kind of sick joke is that? No such thing as a woman doctor."
"Obviously there is if I'm standing right in front of you. Or did my kick knock a few more scews loose?"
Eren was walking buy, noticing the commotion from afar and as a soldier, his instincts to provide help in dire situations kicked in. He elbowed his way to the front. Seeing you standing defiantly in front of five tall muscular men. He stepped forward as the main leader got in your face, but when you shifted your foot, he seemed to coil back. Eren noticed a giant welt on one side of his face and wondered how the hell he got such an ugly bruise. It didn't stop their onslaught.
"Who the hell do you think you are? What makes you think you could do whatever the fuck you want?"
"Because in this world, I'm free to do whatever the fuck I please." Eren watched as your eyes narrowed in further defiance, the smile on your face sickeningly sweet and all he could think about was how he had never seen such a woman.
You hadn't even noticed the audience that gathered, you side stepped the group of men, going as far as waving a goodbye with a breathy giggle, you picked up your basket. You had a small hop to your step and despite not caring to even spare a glance to the onlookers, your eyes met a pair of pretty green ones. The prominent bone structure made you think, "Wow."
However, the tall muscular body you did a once over on had you follow that thought with, "Oh damn."
Eren seemed dumbfounded, your obviousness in checking him out made him flush. He had never felt self-conscious over his body. He knew even before he hit puberty that he would do well to grow muscles and abs, the necessary type of figure to have if one were to be a soldier of the scouts. He knew it was also something some females found attractive in the opposite sex but it's not like he ever had time to date much less dwell on what girls liked. Seeing the way you looked at him though, he couldn't deny that he silently hoped for your approval.
When you finally met his eyes once more, you had him floored when he saw you drop a wink at him.
The crowd murmuring as they watched you go made his own eyebrows furrow in confusion. He stepped to one of the members and demanded an explanation.
"Honestly, the little lady was crazy! She came in here claiming to be a doctor and helped patch up a guy who got cut by the pipe over there. Instead of waiting for a real doctor, she made a whole fuss."
"Where's the guy?"
"Dr. Goodwin picked him up. That doctor is mad too, he also said she was a doctor, but that's ridiculous. No woman can be a doctor. That's so many levels of wrong."
Eren felt the urge to punch the man in the mouth, but one glance at the ugly bruise his friend sported reminded him,
"What happened to your face?"
The leader grumbled a bunch of profanities, "That little bitch. I tried to get her off before she messed the guy up anymore and she kicked me."
"In your face?" Eren sounded impressed, and he was when he received a nod of confirmation.
He looked to the direction which you disappeared in and said fine words to the group, "Whether you men like it or not. The world is changing, everyone is free to be who they want. If women can join the military no problem, they can be doctors too."
He saluted before rushing off, not hearing the mutters of annoyance from the men. In all honestly, Eren had no clue on what he was doing.
You were scrubbing off the blood from under your fingernails near a fountain when you hear the shuffle of feet from behind you. You silently hoped it wasn't any of those morons asking for more trouble, but you were pleasantly surprised when your eyes met a pair of green ones from before.
"I'm Eren." You smiled at him, nodding and your smile turned quirked when he stuttered in, "Yeager. Eren Yeager."
Hmm, you had thought, His name suits him. You studied his demeanor, not missing the gear strapped to either sides of his hips or the green hood covering his shoulders. You knew immediately that he was a scout and you wondered if he knew Captain Levi. Before you got the courage to ask him, he beat you to it.
"What did you mean by what you said earlier? Do you really think that? That we're all free to do anything we want here?"
You smiled as you nodded, walking towards a vendors stand and Eren fell into step beside you, you felt nervous around him, but also safe with his company. He watched you as you picked up another apple to inspect.
"We have laws and rules though...so we're not technically all the way free?"
"I'm free to be me, just as you are free to be you...Eren...Yeager."
It was the way the sun hit your face in that moment, highlighting your strong cheekbones and giving a special glint in your eyes that made Eren want to hear your thoughts more. He spent the rest of the day asking you questions, never satisfied with the small responses you gave him and he even walked you home. The mean glare from your mother confused him beyond belief and it was your father's words that made you gasp in surprise that night.
"He's the titan shifter, the one who helped plug up wall Rose."
Your face had turned red in embarrassment, you were talking so casually to a literal titan and you even flirted with him. He even held your basket the entire trip to your house and you didn't even consider how informal you acted with your skirt. You had hitched one of them up your thigh to get better footing and hadn't missed the way Eren blushed at seeing so much skin. You knew the girls in the scouts wore pants, but even then they kept covered.
You were certain Eren wanted nothing else to do with a girl who held little to no morals, but you were caught by pleasant surprise when you saw him with Erwin and Levi the next day in town.
His eyes had immediately found yours and you didn't miss the blush on his cheeks as he gave you a small wave. You couldn't but laugh when Captain Levi suddenly kicked him.
"Who's got you turning red brat?"
"Uh-it's nothing, captain."
He didn't look convinced as you gathered the courage to approach. Erwin acknowledged your presence which Eren was grateful for, but his eyebrows still came down in confusion on how the commander knew your name.
"Y/N!" Erwin gave a polite smile which you returned, "So great to see you. We were actually just about to stop by your house."
"Really? What a coincidence, I was hoping to stop by headquarters today as well." Your smile was bright, and by the way the air around you seemed cheerful, Erwin returned your energy.
"Bearing good news I hope?" He still hesitantly asked.
You nodded as you laughed, "I would love to accept the offer if it still stands."
"Of course it does," Captain Levi scoffed, his arms were folded across his chest. You noted for the first time the soft grey color of his eyes and despite the deep scowl he was currently showing, he had chubby cheeks that made you want to squish, "We wouldn't be coming all this way for nothing."
"I thought we were coming to collect a new scout, Captain Levi." Eren asked, you felt yourself blush in realization that he had no clue it was actually you they were referring to.
"We are," Levi grabbed you by your arm and yanked you towards him as he pointed at you while looking at Eren like he was an idiot, "Meet the scout's new doctor. Dr. Y/L/N meet Eren-"
"Yeager." You finished, smiling towards Eren, "We've met."
Erwin and Levi exchanged looks as they watched you and Eren smiled at each other like a pair of idiots, the realization dawning over them and Erwin couldn't fight the smirk that crossed his face. Small world, he thought.
Six months had passed since the first fateful encounter you had with Eren. You had long since moved out of your home and besides the occasional secret letter from your father, you hadn't heard nor seen the rest of your family since your decision to become a doctor for the scouts.
It was a transition to go through as you lost one family and gained a new one, but everyone was so accepting and welcoming. The girls welcomed you with open arms, most notably was Sasha whose habit of eating everything and anything brought her to the infirmary on more than one occasion, Connie usually followed right behind her with a minor injury resulting from his carelessness. You had met Floch when he brought Jean in from a sparring session gone wrong and he immediately took a liking to you. Your level-headedness was like a breath of fresh air to him as he was constantly sorrounded by people he thought were idiots. Jean liked your confidence (The fact that you were easy on the eyes, didn't hurt either), Mikasa respected the way you didn't hesitate to put people in their place, and Armin admired that despite your obvious toughness, you were a kind and patient doctor who never turned anyone away. You were diligent and hard-working, yet your smile was always able to uplift any sour mood and you always put your best foot forward. The one time he had puked all over your hospital floor from eating too much undercooked meat was embarrassing for him, he thought for sure you were going to be angry and call him an idiot. Instead, you took his temperature, put a cold cloth on his head (despite his titan status guaranteeing a speedy recovery), and started a healthier diet plan for him. Armin was scheduled a weekly checkup with you, partly to ensure he was listening and partly for you to study him a bit more. Your research on the titan's ability to regenerate and recover from even the worst injuries was fascinating for you, you hoped to isolate the genes and figure out a way to maybe trigger it in regular Eldians without setting off the titan ability, the fact that Eren made it a habit to accompany Armin didn't hurt either.
Eren had grown attached to you, whenever he wasn't busy or in need of a place to hide from Captain Levi's wrath or Hange's insistence to poke and prod him, he would be hanging out around you or in your office. At one point you had to hide him under your desk when Commander Erwin stopped by to hold a meeting with you about providing first aid training to the scouts for excursions. You were always welcomed to accompany them outside the walls, but your work was enough to make you stay. You recalled the way Eren was pressed against your legs, the feel of his hands steadying himself on your calves and when your skirt had shifted up when you reached for one of the records, you felt Eren brush his fingertips along the muscle. You had stammered the rest of the meeting through and smacked him afterwards for putting you in such a compromising position. You were blushing furiously at the way he gave such a boyish grin and even that night while he walked you to your small cottage, he had a satisfied smile in place.
You always knew you liked Eren, you were also hopeful that the feeling was mutual. The both of you had grown close over the course of your stay, as the head doctor you were given your own living quarters, not too far from headquarters but not so close to the city that you would be given a hard time. Your cottage was fair in size and with the amount of income you were receiving, you were quick to furnish and decorate it to your liking. Eren had even helped by adding his own touches to the interior. The times you would go to the city with him was always met with many curious stares. Your age and gender made many turn heads when you walked in, the fact that you were the youngest and by far prettiest doctor the scouts had ever had made people naturally gravitate to you. Your ability to make friends quickly also made it that almost every weekend you were entertaining guests at your house. Sometimes it would be dinner with Sasha, Niccolo, and Connie. Other times you would be knitting and embroidering with Mikasa and Armin, there was even game nights with everyone until Jean and Eren became too competitive with one another. Other times when the higher ups had meetings (All of which you had to attend since you technically held an officer position within the military branch) you would offer your house where you all shared cups of tea and your famous baked goods. You had even seen Captain Levi grab seconds on your sugar cookies.
It was the times when Eren would swing by alone that caused your heart to flutter, he would walk you home almost every night now. At first he would find the poorest excuses to see you like needing a bandaid for his wrist from the biting (even though by the time you gave him the gauze it would be healed over completely) or try to "casually" be around the area when you would get out at three in the morning. Eventually your amusement turned to you asking him to walk you home every night under the guise that you were afraid of being targeted or hurt, even though everyone had seen you body-slam Reiner the one time he tried to hit on you when you were stitching up his eyebrow from an ugly gash. Nonetheless, Eren accepted. You would invite him in for tea every time and he would even bring you lunch on days he failed to see you in the cafeteria. It seemed like everyone under the sun knew about you and Eren's crushes on one another, so it was also a pain in the ass that neither of you had yet to make a move on one another. Even Erwin had assumed you two were together the one morning he stopped by your house on your day off to ask for your aid for a soldier who had broken their arm from a training exercise, his eyes had grown wide upon seeing you open the door in only your nightgown, you were rubbing the sleep from your eyes as you invited him in for breakfast.
Upon walking in, he immediately saw Eren exiting your bathroom in his casual jeans, his hair was wet and sticking up from the steam of the shower. Eren wasn't wearing a shirt and before Erwin could excuse himself completely you quickly explained how you hadn't wanted him to walk outside so late so he slept on your couch. You were washing his clothes and had left them out to dry and Erwin could only nod and stop himself from suggesting for Eren to bring spare clothes to yours, remembering that it wasn't his place to push or even encourage his team's doctor and titan-shifter to date even though by the way he saw you put jelly on Eren's toast while he made your cup of tea with three sugars was enough for him to almost just order the two of you to date. Instead, he gave a long rant to Levi, wondering aloud whether Eren was either oblivious to your affections or just an idiot, Levi only replied with, "Did you happen to bring any of the toast she made?"...he did and Levi later on answered, "He's just an idiot." while licking the excess jelly off his fingers.
It was another day at headquarters, the mid-summer day was hot and since the flow of traffic had been slow inside the infirmary, you found yourself mostly in the officer's lounge. You had opted to wear a long sleeve empire waist dress, the top had ruffles along your collar and the soft pink of the dress complimented your skin tone. It fell around mid-thigh and the black shoes you wore with them completed your overall look. Eren had stared at your bare legs for a while until he noted your haircut. You had only cut off the ends but your heart did a flip as you blushed from him noticing. You had been chatting with Hange about your research while Moblit spoke to Eren about the new set of routes to be taken during their next trip beyond the walls when Captain Levi walked in. Hange waved him over and he fell easily beside you.
"Hey." His arm brushing against yours and you hummed in response, leaning a bit towards him which didn't go unnoticed by Eren.
"Levi, did you take your medicine this morning?" About two weeks ago you had caught the captain asleep at his desk for the fourth time. You knew he overworked himself and refused to sleep in his bed no matter how many therapeutic pillows you got him, but while he was out like a light you decided to check his blood pressure, only to find it alarmingly high. You figured the amount of stress and cups of caffeinated tea were to blame. Levi kept in good shape, but considering his age and the fact that he never even considers laughing, you prescribed him medications to be take every morning and cut him off from his usual tea leaves. The former was easier to push as the calcium and magnesium capsules were easy to swallow, it was getting rid of all the tins in his desk that made him a bit unbearable to the new recruits.
He let out an annoyed grunt as he nodded. Your smile was soft as you put an encouraging hand on his arm and Eren was officially not listening to Moblit anymore.
"Thanks for sticking to your diet, Captain Levi. As a token of my appreciation, I got you these." You didn't let him reply, quick to act as always as you reached into the small basket you had brought and grabbed his hand to put the gray tin of loose leaves that you took out in his palm.
As usual, the captain was unfazed by your lack of appreciation for personal space. The past few weeks had done well to teach him how despite being yelled at, threatened, and even outright ignored at times, your cheeriness was impossible to diminish and you did whatever the heck you wanted even when it was at times impulsive.
"What is it?" He looked between you and the tin, the slight sneer on his upper lip making you release a giggle before you tapped the bow you tied on it.
"It's tea leaves." He raised a slim eyebrow which made you roll your eyes, "Decaffeinated tea."
"Let me guess, it tastes like shit." His eyes flickered to the purple bow, "Or it'll make me shit."
You laughed, you upper body leaning on his as you attempted to catch your breath. The joke wasn't that funny but the face he made was. You giggled as you shook your head and Hange watched in bemusement as you elaborated,
"It's the tea I always serve and judging by the three cups you had last time, I'm positive you'll like it."
Levi let out a nod, he hadn't even noticed that the tea you served had no caffeine but the heavy notes of honey in it probably explained its sweetness. He gave a quiet thank you before his scowl returned,
"So that's why I was on the crapper all night after the last meeting."
"With a potty mouth like that, it's not wonder you don't have a girlfriend." You deadpanned.
"I feel bad for the poor bastard who falls in love with you."
You let out a small tsk, smiling at him and hoping Eren heard as you said, "Well that depends if he admits he feels the same way."
Captain Levi quirked an eyebrow at you, his eyes knowing and you blushed under his stare. Your fingers fiddling behind your back and Eren hated the way Levi suddenly chuckled at you. His smile was a rarity and to have him giving it to you only meant one thing to Eren; the captain liked you.
"So there is someone you like? Who's the poor brat?"
When you were about to make another snide remark, Hange cut in and excused herself and Moblit.
"As fascinating as this is, there's a captured titan waiting my arrival and if I don't get to use this research Dr. Y/L/N just gave me before nightfall, I will lose my mind."
"I hadn't heard of us ever finding it to begin with." Levi sighed, taking a lock of your hair between his fingers and letting the curl bounce back before he excused himself to tag along with them.
"Someone's got to make sure four eyes doesn't get killed."
"That's why Moblit is going with her." You noted.
"And who do you think will make sure Moblit doesn't get killed?" He smiled once more, "Laters doc."
You waved goodbye to the three, the door clicking behind them and you turned to see Eren with his arms crossed. He was pouting like a child and you wondered what his deal was. You figured with your earlier comment, he would be over the moon to hear you hinting at liking him. You skipped up to him, getting on the tips of your toes as you poked his cheek.
"What's the matter? You look like a scolded child."
"Nothing." He muttered, looking away as his jaw clenched and you only poked him once more.
"Liar." You called him out, "Talk to me."
"You didn't answer Captain Levi's question."
You were sure that there was a giant question mark on top of your head, the gear in your mind shifting as you tried to recall what the captain asked before your mouth opened in realization. You couldn't help but smile as you looked down at Eren's shoes and he only seemed to grow angrier as he watched you blush.
"About my crush? Oh! Well I wouldn't call him a brat, but I guess his attitude could often warrant that title. He's got this sort of this determined mentality that I guess some people can find...overbearing." You played with the cuff of your dress, "But I personally find it charming."
"So he's charming?"
You hummed as you smiled, "He's a bit rough around the edges, but he always means well. He's easy on the eyes too. Got really nice hair and pretty colored eyes that makes me swoon around him. Not to mention his body looks like Zeus could be his father." To add emphasis, your body leaned side to side as you laughed.
Eren snorted, his eyes rolling as he thought of any guy he knew that was like you described. All he could think of was Captain Levi and Erwin. He hated to think of Levi as charming, but he was rough all around. Erwin had eyes that Historia had once described as pretty, but to think of you being attracted to someone as old as him made his stomach flip.
"Want to head back to my office?" You suggested, not wanting to leave Eren's side until he figured it out but also not wanting to stick around in case other officers walked in. You got a stiff nod and wanted to giggle when Eren still opened the door for you. As the both of you walked through the large building, you added a hop to your step as you continued,
"He's also such a gentleman. He respects me, he's never intimidated by my sharp wit, always opens doors for me, waits until I'm sitting before he starts eating, and he almost seems proud of me being a doctor. He's just so understanding and sure of himself as a man that I guess the idea of having a girlfriend in my position would never make him feel inferior." You turned to look at Eren sideways and noticed his shoulders hunched, you knew it was cruel how you kept teasing him but were hopeful that it would click for him soon, so you went on.
"Wow, sounds like a real keeper." He grumbled, now thinking of Jean or even Connie. Armin was too occupied with Annie and Reiner was too obsessed with Historia to hang around you. There was no way Beruto/Borrito/Bertoto would catch your eye as you had made it a point to always get his name wrong, but Connie made you laugh and Jean was always extra nice to you.
"I'm telling you, I think he's perfect. He's dependable, strong, and we share so many of the same ideas. I could talk to him for hours and never be bored and when I'm not with him, I feel...sad. I just constantly want to be by his side and if I'm not I want him to be thinking about me because that's exactly what I do."
You both entered your office, you walked up to your desk as you spoke, turning around and leaning against it to look at Eren. He had closed your door a little harder than necessary, the wood shaking against the frame as he crossed his arms and leaned his back on the door. He looked downright irritated and you bit your lip to keep from laughing.
"So why haven't you told him?"
You shrugged, "I think I've been pretty obvious about it, I'm always smiling when he's in the room, I always want to be with him, there's never a day where we don't walk together. I even wore this dress for him today."
You waved down at your figure, Eren's eyes looked over you twice and you jumped up on your desk, your thighs parting as you let the short skirt cover your panties and barely cover the tops of your thighs.
"I'm sure he'll love it." Eren spit out.
"I don't know..." You tilted your head, "Do you?"
Eren pushed himself off the door, going to your bookcase and letting his fingers brush the spines of the books, "It doesn't matter what I think. I'm not Mr. Pretty eyes. Sounds like a simpleton to me."
You let out an actual deep sigh and Eren met you with furrowed brows.
"What?"
"You're so fucking dense, Eren."
"What did I say?" He threw his hands up, "Just because I called him simple? I'm so sorry I don't care to hear you go on and on about this guy. I never thought I'd see you bend over backwards for some guy who opens doors for you. I thought you would have higher standards than that."
You let out a snort, "Keep talking Yeager, and I just might higher them."
"I mean I never thought looks would be so important to you. It's so-"
"So what?" Your tongue had a sharp edge that did not go unnoticed by Eren. He stood only a few feet from your desk, but you saw the awkward shift in his posture.
"Shallow." He spit out.
"Excuse me?" You gave him a look that said if he wouldn't apologize in the next ten seconds, he would surely live to regret it.
"What I mean is...what guy could possibly have this head over heels and you're just now telling me? I thought...I thought we-" He stopped, looking to the side and you relaxed before saying,
"We what, Eren?"
"I thought we had something special." He muttered. He looked to see your mouth opened in a small gasp and he began to turn to exit when you quietly beckoned him over.
"Eren...come here."
"No, I should g-"
"Please." You begged and the look in your eyes brought him to stand in front of you. Your hands reached for his shirt, yanking him forward and you hooked your legs around his calves. Eren gaped at you, not knowing what to do and say as you put one hand on his shoulder and the other cupped his cheek.
"You are such a dumbass." You laughed, "The person I've been going on and on about, that simpleton you bashed, is you. It's always been you, Eren."
It was like watching a light flicker on very very slowly, but once it was on you watched as embarrassment flooded Eren. His smile was sheepish and stupid as he stuttered over his words. His hands rested on your hips and you stroked his face from his temple to jaw as you asked,
"Do you maybe feel the same way?"
You didn't get a verbal answer, the sudden kiss Eren laid on you was an answer enough. His lips were soft and warm as they moved against your own, his tongue enveloped yours and you felt him lean more onto you. The moan that slipped out his mouth when you bit his bottom lip made something tighten in your stomach.
When you two finally broke apart you didn't miss the trail of saliva that connected the two of you and you whimpered for more. The second kiss was heavier, a clash of teeth and tongues as Eren feverishly wrestled to touch you everywhere his hands could reach. You felt him press against your core, the loud gasp you let out made him look at you in concern.
"Sorry, sorry. I'll stop if you want me to."
You shook your head as you met those green eyes that held you captive since day one, "More. I want more."
The smirk was something you had never seen, his eyes became half-lidded as Eren kissed your nose. Then your chin, then your neck. When he reached your collar, his finger hooked onto the top of your dress, pulling the fabric down as he kissed just above your breast.
"She wants more." He said to himself, the soft rasp in his voice made you attempt to close your legs. His hands pushed what little that had covered your legs up and Eren's fingers brushed your core.
The jump you gave made his smirk grow, "I haven't even touched you yet."
He saw the small patch of dampness on your panties, and before you could ask him what he was doing, you let out a sharp gasp when his fingers pushed the fabric to the side and he plunged two fingers into your pussy.
The moan he ripped from you was like music to his ears and as he began to slowly pump his fingers in and out he watched as your face became hot and red. It was uncomfortable as first, you could even say it hurt but that didn't stop you from rocking your hips up to meet his eager hands. You weren't entirely prepared as you felt a bit tense as Eren kissed your neck, the suckling on your flesh making small breathy whimpers leave your mouth. His other hand's fingers hovered over the buttons on the back of your dress and his eyes asked for permission as he glanced up at you.
A small tentative nod was all he received before he took out his hand from between your legs, his tongue skillfully licking the digits cleaned and you didn't think you would find such an act so erotic. You arm hooked around his neck as you brought him down to a kiss, you could taste yourself on his lips as he kissed you back eagerly, his fingers skillfully working the buttons on your dress and you wondered for a brief moment if he had ever done such an act before. You pushed the thoughts away, not wanting to lose focus or confidence while in the middle of being with Eren by letting unnecessary insecure creep into your heart. As if being able to read your mind, Eren said-
"Stop being in your head," A hard kiss against your lips, "Be here with me."
His nose rubbed sweetly against yours, fingers tilting your head up as you gave a hesitant nod. Your eyes wanted to focus anywhere but his eyes and you could felt warmth spread across your cheeks when the sleeves of your dress fell down your arms. The idea of letting Eren see all of you was as exciting as it was nerve-wrecking, the most he ever saw was your legs and back from that one time you walked out of the bath in only a towel. Seeing him shirtless was not new but you still felt your breath catch in your throat as you watched him yank the material off. Your hands explored the newly exposed skin, fingers dipping in every curve of muscle and your hand rested just above the waistband of his jeans. You noticed his breathing grow heavy, Eren's head falling forward on your exposed shoulder where you felt him nip and suck on the soft flesh. You returned the favor by kissing him on the chest, your eyes still casted downwards as you fumbled with the buckle on his belt, you let out a small curse from how hard your hands were shaking and Eren placed a gentle hand on top of yours, his eyes alight with amusement as his lips curved into a soft smile.
"Baby, relax." He murmured, he pushed your hands aside as he took over the task. You let out a deep breath as you heard the sound of his zipper being tugged down and you decided to be bold. You lowered the upper half of your dress, the cotton falling off your arms with ease and you blushed furiously once you remembered that you hardly ever wore bras and today was no different.
Your nipples were taut as you shivered from the cold air in your office and Eren stared at you in wonder his eyes raking your body as you looked to the side and brought your bottom lip in between your teeth.
"Fuck, can I touch you?" Eren blurted, his hands still near his trousers and you giggled when he added a last second, "Please."
Nodding, you figured it was time to stop feeling so shy. You had been dreaming about this moment for months, yet as the man you loved stood before you, eager to be with you, all you could think about was how scared you were that you wouldn't be enough to satisfy him.
One more glance at the way he watched you was enough for you to think, If he really didn't, he wouldn't be looking at me as if I put all the stars in the sky.
You felt the second wind of confidence hit you and you took Eren by surprise as you hooked your fingers on his belt loops and tugged the fabric down. You palmed him through the thin material of his briefs and his hips jerked from the contact before he melted against you. Lowering the elastic, your small hand wrapped itself around his shaft and you took a moment to admire his dick. It was something new and foreign to you, for a moment you wondered if all male penises looked like that but you pushed that thought aside as you found yourself not really wanting to ever know, as long as Eren's would be the only one you saw. You hand moved up and down, your thumb brushing across his tip as you swiped some of the liquid leaking out to use as lube.
You knew he was a few inches above average, the thickness was also enough to make you worry for a moment whether he would be able to fit in you as his fingers struggling to push inside of you were of any indication of how tight your body was. Either way you were determined to satisfy the both of you, the idea of him using you and watching his face come apart as he milked himself dry using only your pussy had your head feeling fuzzy with want. He rested his head on you, causing your body to lean back and you pressed one palm on your desk behind you and the other jerked him off a bit sloppily. His moans filled the space of your office, you secretly prayed to the gods that the scouts could be smart enough for once to not be injured or to be able to at least handle it themselves and your eyes flickered to the door for a moment.
"Eren," You murmured to the shell of his ear, his heavy breaths fanning across the span of your chest and you felt both your bodies getting hot. "The door, we need to lock the door."
His groan was the only response you got as he trailed kisses up your neck and shoulder, and you resisted the urge to roll your eyes, he was such a guy sometimes. You began to lower yourself from the desk before his hand on your leg suddenly halted your movements and he gave you a lazy smile, his half lidded eyes softly rolling as he let out an obnoxious groan of annoyance.
"I'll do it." He didn't even bother to tuck himself back into his briefs, his dick fully erect as he made way to your door. You felt your hand falling to your side and you bit your lip as you thought about what you wanted to do twice before letting your own hand push the fabric of your underwear to the side once more. You rubbed at your clit lazily as you softly moaned, your eyes closing at the sensation and you smiled when you heard the soft, "Shit." coming from a few feet ahead of you. Eren's eyes were transfixed on you, the way your head rolled back as your moans became louder and higher pitched was making him painfully hard and he wanted-no needed to be inside of you before he was sure he would come right then and there.
Your eyes were still closed when you felt him settle between your legs once more, eyes hazy and smile lazy as you felt him tug your panties down your legs. Your ass lifted briefly to help and you giggled when he grunted in annoyance from having to shuffle backwards to slip them off completely. He laughed with you as his hand cupped you by your jaw, lips finding yours in a tender kiss and the hand that had been rubbing at your clit was used to steady yourself by his shoulder. His muscles flexed under your touch and your breaths intermingled as he stared at you with such an intensity that you felt your stomach flip. You looked down to where he rubbed his length along your folds and gulped.
"I-I'm nervous." You admitted, cheeks blushing and Eren kissed your temple.
"It's okay, I'll take care of you. Do you trust me?" You gasped at the intensity in his eyes, Eren Yeager was one who never beat around the bush and you felt tears pool around your eyes as you nodded. Everything leading up to this moment overwhelmed you suddenly, losing your family, gaining your dream job, becoming independent so quickly, and falling in love with a man who turned into what so many feared but who let you place` flower crowns on his head during tea parties. He continued to maintain eye contact with you, your lips parting and eyes partly closing as he began to push past your labia. It all felt too much, but you wouldn't want to be anywhere else in that exact moment Eren pressed his tip into your passageway. There was a bit of resistance and the guttural moan he released made your eyes widen in an audible gasp, he looked ethereal with reddened cheeks, a slacked opened jaw, eyes that looked close to tears, and thin layer of sweat making his dark brown locks stick to his forehead.
He pushed another inch in, trying his best to not act too quickly or too harshly. All he wanted to do was fucking ruin you. Mark you as his by impregnating you and watching as you took every drop of his semen. It seemed you wanted it too as your hips jerked forward and took in another inch.
"Eren, please." You had no idea what you were asking for, he was being slow and gentle and as much as you appreciated his mindfulness, it had been six long months and if you had to go through another night of humping your pillow or rubbing one out with only fantasies of Eren touching you (Sometimes even Levi, depending on how much alcohol you had consumed) you were gong to scream.
Another inch and a deep chuckle was his response. Your eyes were set ablaze as the realization that he was teasing you.
"Please what baby?"
"Give it to me." You whispered, your hand tugging at his hair harshly and the hiss of pain he released was simultaneous when he completely thrusted his entire length into you. Your thighs jerked at the sudden intrusion and the cry you let out was loud enough that if anybody were nearby, the would have assumed someone struck you. Your hand smacked against his chest, your breath ragged as you attempted to give Eren an angry glance but your pussy betrayed you as it clenched hard around him.
You both released a gasp when Eren fully bottomed out inside you. His hips flush against your parted thighs and your foreheads pressed against one another, lips brushing but not kissing yet as you two came to terms of what was being done. You and Eren were one, there was no going back from what was about to transpire and you silently prayed that he wouldn't regret it later.
"Stop being in your head," He murmured against your mouth, eyes looking into yours, "Be here..."
He gave a heavenly thrust and you felt his arms wrap themselves around your waist as he forced you to fall back onto your desk with a small uff and your hands fell onto his shoulders. Your legs locked around his waist and the new angle caused him to be deeper inside you, but he continued to stare at your with that same admiration from that day he had met you.
"With me."
You nodded slowly, kissing Eren for what felt like the first time. A bit shyly and unsure as your mouth moved against his slowly, you savored the taste of tea and something sweet from his tongue and you let one of your hands hold him by his face as the other found solace in his hair.
Eren began to thrust into you, the rhythm a bit off at first as you two tried to find what worked and when he dipped his hips a little and heard the string of filthy words leaving your mouth, he gave a knowing smirk.
"Hmm, right there princess?"
You panted, your tongue lolling out as his began to go faster. One of your hands shot out to the side to brace yourself on something when Eren began to fuck you harder and instead you turned to see you hand knocked your bottle of ink over, the deep blue liquid was spilling everywhere but before you could let your brain process the mess, Eren began to suck on the flesh of your neck that you exposed when you moved your head. You moaned as you closed your eyes at the overwhelming sensations of it all, your hands grabbing at the muscles in his back and you arched your own and pressed your chest into him.
"Oh fuck," Eren moaned out, "This pussy is so good. You're taking me so well, princess."
"Yeah?" You panted out, "Going to cum in me, baby?"
Eren picked himself up on his forearms, too preoccupied with how pretty your tits looks bouncing with each thrust to notice the your hair was sprawled all over and the upper part of his arm was touching something wet, he figured it was the sweat you two were producing with your coupling.
"I'm gonna get you pregnant, make you mine forever."
"I'm yours!" You screamed as his hips slammed particularly harder down onto your own.
"Choke me, make me a mommy, cum in me, just please don't stop fucking me." You cried out, and a new sort of excitement showed in his eyes, his hand cupped just below your jaw and the light pressure he put on you made you moan louder.
The sounds of skin smacking, panting breaths, and heavy moans filled the air. Eren coaxing you to come all over his dick as you begged him to not pull out of you echoed of the walls of your office. You went on like that for a good while and you giggled in realization that your silent wish for everyone to leave the two of you alone for a while had come true.
Unbeknownst to you two, there had almost been three interruptions. The first being Captain Levi who wanted to ask if mixing his blood pressure medicine with wine would be too dangerous, but when he heard you scream he almost barged in before the unmistakable moan that followed made him fully come to a halt. He didn't even think twice about what was transpiring, briefly remembering that Eren was in fact with you this morning before quickly turning around and hauled ass as far from the hallway as he could. He wasn't sure where he was heading before he stumbled into Erwin's office, the commander looking up to see his captain look like he just ran a marathon.
"Levi? You look like you just saw a ghost?" His eyebrows creased, "Are you okay?"
"Yeager isn't as dense as we thought."
Eren stood to his full height, grabbing at your ankles and moving your legs onto his shoulders to they were fully parallel to his body. You let out another giggle at how your ankles were now on either side of his head, but the small kiss he gave your right one made you let out a noise of adoration. He gripped your hips, smiling as he noted the streaks of something blue all over your chest and neck but decided against telling you as your pussy began to pulsate around him. There was no way in hell he was going to stop you from orgasming.
The second time was Sasha and Connie as they wanted to ask if eating candies with the wrapper still on was anything they needed to worry about, but the sounds of your desk scraping across the floor with Eren commending you for being a good girl and taking him so well made the both of them stare at each other with wide eyes. The "Huh?"'s they exchanged were amusing to anyone else and Sasha grabbed Connie by the collar before they hightailed out of there. Connie wanting to see if Eren had really been capable of pulling you and Sasha calling it bullshit and stating that the real reason was that he wanted to see you naked.
His thrusts became wild and sloppy, the slushing sounds you two were making was the hottest sounds you ever heard. You held onto his wrists, your smile wide and beautiful and Eren knew he wasn't going to be able to hold out much longer.
"I'm not gonna last long," He let you know, you nodded as you reached down to rub your clit in circles.
"Fuck, you look so hot." He blurted, his cheeks a deeper red and you gave him another soft smile.
"Thanks, baby. You too." His abs were going to be the death of you and you hoped you would get the chance to suck him off later to lick them one by one in foreplay.
You felt him begin to twitch in you and you knew you were so close, your rubbing speeding up as Eren's thrusts were becoming more sporadic. The way his eyes began to roll upwards had you chanting,
"I'm-I'm cumming!" Your moan was breathy and high as you felt your release overwhelm your senses, you felt euphoria as you moaned so loud that Jean and Floch who didn't believe Connie when he said that Eren had managed to bed you stared at each other with wide eyes and gaped mouths as they stood outside your door. Their cheeks red as they rushed down the hallway as if their asses were on fire, not even halfway down the stairs when they felt their collars yanked at so harshly they almost trampled down, Captain Levi's glare knowing as he began to reprimand them for being nosy pricks.
Eren's cock dove into you hard and you felt him pulsate as he shot long ropes of cum into you, his essence overflowing as he filled you to the brim and painted your insides white.
His moan was unbelievably loud and low, the "I love you." That followed didn't go unnoticed by you and the smile he gave, made you realize how much he meant it.
"I love you." Your answered back, he pushed your thighs to your chest when he lowered himself to kiss you. His cock softening inside you and he slowed his thrusts down and milked himself dry. He tapped his tip on your sensitive clit, making sure he was empty before tucking himself back into his boxers and jeans. The creampie in you was beginning to ooze out and he used his two fingers to push it back in, your hips bucking at the intrusion and you whined about your sensitivity.
You sat up, your hand going to fix your hair, only groaning slightly when you felt the ink on some strands already drying. You huffed before jumping down and fixing your dress. Eren was putting his shirt back on, his back slightly turned to you and your eyes widened in embarrassment at seeing the blue ink in what was obviously your finger prints streaked all over. You looked down and saw that it had well faded from your hands, transferring to your lover who put on his jacket. You shrugged, figuring no one would see it and you could wash your hands later. Your hair would be a bit tricky to explain but you would be home to shower soon anyway, which reminded you-
"Do you want to stay over tonight?" You blurted, scaring Eren as his eyes widened, you bit the inside of your cheek and fumbled with your fingers.
He smiled, walking up to you and kissing you on the lips before replying, "I would love to. I have to do some work today, and pack an overnight bag but I'll be home by dinner." His eyes looked you over, stifling a laugh when he saw the marks of blue ink on your neck, debating on telling you but not being able to deny how cute they looked on you, a gentle reminder of what happened just moments ago and an odd turn on for him to think of it as him marking you as his, the lovebite also on the side making him watch you with love.
You nodded before giving a follow-up question, "Chicken or fish?"
"Fish." He nodded, you grabbed a few papers from your desk drawer and Eren asked if you were all set before taking your hand into his as the two of you began to walk out the office, you mentioned having to speak to Erwin about the cadet recovering from a broken limb and Eren listened patiently, your hands swinging in between the two of you and you both relished at how easy it felt to transition into a life of domestication together. He walked you to Erwin's office, his knuckles knocking on the door before a loud, "One minute!" replied.
You both shared a look of confusion before shrugging and stepping to the side. You fixing his hair and Eren's hand resting on top of your hips when the office door opened. You both turned to see Jean and Floch who sported sullen faces, their arms swinging in front of them as if they were children just denied a cone of ice cream.
"Boys?" You called, your free hand interlocking with Eren who stood in place as you took a step toward the pair. "Everything alright?"
They looked between you and Eren, Jean seeing the ink marks on your neck and seeing Eren's hair haphazard was enough to make him look to the floor, his cheeks reddening and Eren could only smirk. Floch was the opposite, he couldn't take his eyes off you as his face held a permanent grimace and you wondered if he was constipated.
"Baby," Eren called, tugging you back to him and Jean scoffed, Possessive ass is already showing her off. He thought to himself.
"They just got yelled at by Erwin, whatever they did was obviously bad, just leave them be."
You nodded in understanding, giving them a comforting smile and Floch didn't miss the knowing look in Eren's eyes.
"Sorry to hear about that. If you two ever need anything, you know where my office is."
"Yeah, that's the problem." Captain Levi's voice came from the doorway. Jean and Floch mumbled a quick goodbye before scurrying away and you couldn't help but fall into deeper confusion.
The captain and Eren exchanged looks before Eren bent to kiss your cheek.
"I got to go. I'll see you later, princess." You blushed at the nickname and public display, murmuring a soft okay in reply as your boyfriend? walked away from you.
You gave Levi a smile which he didn't return, you didn't miss the small blush on his cheeks and you figured it was from seeing such intimacy from Eren. You were almost positive Levi was still a virgin. Walking into Erwin's office, you all but skipped the man's desk, falling beside him and giving him a bright smile which he returned.
"Hey Erwin, just wanted to update you on the cadet's recovery plan. He should be back in training in a few months if he listens to my instructions, think you can help me?"
"Sure what do you need?"
"Well, I'd need you to sign these release forms first." You shrugged putting the papers in front of him, you looked at his desk and grabbed the pen, "Where's your ink?"
The chuckle the two men gave you made your eyebrows furrow in confusion.
"What?"
"Seems like you're wearing it, Doc." Levi's eyes flickered to your neck.
You let out a gasp and your hands slapped to cover you and the laughs that followed only made you blush furiously.
Dammit, You thought, Eren you idiot.
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Abourt Rei Himura and BNHA Chapter 301
Now that I've read the official release of chapter 301 I can finally try to gather my thoughts. I think this time the particular rendition of dialogues and inflections provided by Caleb Cook is more crisp and clear than usual, especially in throwing "shade" upon Endeavor as a father figure. But let's do things in order...
Title: THE WRONG WAY TO PUT OUT A FIRE - a simple, but stark message that doesn't leave space for ambiguity. There was a fire, an imminent tragedy that could and should have been avoided, but whoever tried to fix it, did it all wrong and now we have to deal with a huge arson.
CARLESS HANDLING OF FIRE, on the other hand, doesn't quite cut it for me, because it seems like everything was caused by a foolish mistake. "I was carless and now I'm in a pinch"- type of situation, while it's perfectly clear that Endeavor and Rei decided purposefully which "strategy" to use with Touya. A BAD one to say it lightly. Rei's contribution and complicity is debatable, of course, and I'll touch on this later.
Let me get this clear though: I'm not trying in any way to critique the hard work of unofficial translators. I can't say anything relevant because I'm not a translator in the first place (I can barely understand English and my native language on a good day) and also because I am so grateful for everything they do in order to give us really good material FREE OF CHARGE basically a second after the release in Japan. I'm just interested about the different shades of subtext we can catch if we read the story through multiple filters. Every translation is unique because it carries the personal spin of the author even if the bias should be inexistent or ideally undetectable...
However, back to the chapter
REI'S CAGE
The first scene opens on a luxurious classic Japanese villa, with Enji, Rei and her parents discussing the motivation behind Enji's proposal. Or at least we initially think that's what's going on... Because in reality Rei's family couldn't care less about the motivation. Everything these people see is a wealthy, famous guy the next number one hero ready to take their daughter in marriage. I guess the Himuras are pretty broke, thight on cash, their old prestige is definitely gone and all they can do to save themselves from shame and poverty is "to sell" their only remaining asset.
During the whole ordeal, Rei is standing still, silent, cold as ice. She knows she doesn't really have a choice. How mortifying and sad is this? An adult, capable woman has no agency whatsoever, she is used again and again and she stoically accepts this treatment from every single dominant figure in her life until she can't be stoic anymore. I really hope Horikoshi's going to give her a much more proactive role in saving her family and it seems the narrative wants us to expect this type of character development.
I'd like to point out 2 panels in particular:
First one
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In this scene the Todorokis are back from their trip to the doc, who clearly said they shouldn't try to conceive a child with a perfect quirk mix because it is dangerous (and morally questionable too). Rei understands this fact and tries to dissuade Enji, but he doesn't listen, because he's projecting all his pent-up resentment and frustration onto Touya. He knows how it feels to crush against an unbreakable wall, since he can't surpass All might and his son can't too. He had to learn this truth the hard way, so Touya needs to do the same. Enji is purposefully throwing upon his son years of failures, self consciousness and despair, just because the boy has to get it into his thick skull that he is a dud, just like his father. This is not a hopeless dad making a mistake bona fide, this is a broken man trying to destroy his self reflection by proxy, annihilating everything Touya is, swiping the kid's identity under the rug. He describes his son's dreams and sadness as something birthed from stubbornness. He is auto-convincing himself however (because Endeavor is not stupid). A little bit later he's basically saying: "Touya let's play make believe! We can go on like everything I had engulfed in your psyche never existed, you're a failed attempt so you don't exist. Your needs and wants are silly and useless, nothing worth dealing with now that I can't make you my prodigy. Why don't you go play with the other failures so that I don't have to look at myself while taking actually care of you. I don't want to see you, because it's too painful, because you're a remainder of my own inadequacy."
Note: If you want to read an incredibly well done analysis about Endeavor's motives and psyche, you can get it on @thyandrawrites , she's dwelt on everything extensively and way better than me.
I really want to talk about Rei though. In the panel I showed above, her expression is a bit tricky to analyse. At first she is very vocal about her position. She doesn't want to put Touya through useless suffering, especially since they have a scientific reason not to. They have no guarantee of success with other children, besides, they could possibly have to deal with other health related issues. However, all it takes to convince her in the end is Enji's half assed attempt at the "It's for Touya's sake" shtick. Is it really? Why doesn't she question her husband anymore?
Well... I think before Natsuo, she was probably hoping Touya would let go "naturally", with time and growth, maybe by taking interest in his other siblings. Rei said she wanted to have more children because in her mind they would have supported and loved each other. Maybe she was naive enough to think that a big family full of kids few years apart from each other was all Touya needed to distract himself from his purposes... BUT and here is the point I want to get across: She was deluding herself too, much like Enji. The ugly truth, in my opinion, is that Rei is a person prone to protect herself by going with everything other people want, especially if said people are capable of hurting her. Yes, she was hurt time and time again, but what would have happened if she really tried to stop Enji?
What I am trying to say is that Rei is the kind of person who endures to survive. She holds a "captive" mentality in which, by indulging her captor's desires, she can continue living with less possibile damage. If I stay still and silent, if I don't make a scene, I can go on, I can hold onto the few things I have that actually make me happy.
Let's think about it... Enji was so obsessed with his psychotic, power-hungry quest that he would have probably disown Rei. She would have been thrown away for a more compliant woman with an ice quirk, or something similar, this resulting in her probably losing everything, the respect and love of her family (the Himuras) and also her own children. Because we know Endeavor can definitely hold a grudge and is vendicative.
So, clarifying, Rei doesn't put up a fight because she is scared for herself in a way... She is scared to be hurt in the worst possible way (by losing her little bit of serenity), so her strategy is to endure and to keep up a facade of control and purpose.
Rei, ironically just like Touya and other characters in mha, doesn't really get what unconditional love is. Her family loves her until she can be useful to the Himura name and status, her husband loves her for her quirk. Her children, however, love her for who she is and she wants to stay with them... Only to be forced to leave them later anyway.
The few times Rei actually smiles are when she is with her babies. She is a deeply loving mother in her core, but her declining mental health makes her a very lacking caregiver.
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This panel, in my opinion, shows the point of no return for Rei. She can't keep the glacial facade forever...
After Natsuo's turn to be deemed a failure, Endeavor is crazier than ever, because All Might is as popular and loved as ever and he hasn't make any progress into his eugenetic games. The last two images of Rei are very telling. She is exhausted, but she knows what her husband wants from her this time too. She looks like a lifeless doll and honestly I can easily see Shouto's conception as... Non consensual and I will stop here.
Then Shouto is born, the last, perfect specimen... And Rei isn't doing much for Touya, we can see she's apparently blind towards her eldest son's distress already after Natsuo's birth... But why?
Because she is actively avoiding to face the Touya's problems too.
If Touya is still suffering, is still feeling stressed and worthless, then everything Rei has endured, everything she pretended not to feel for the sake of her family has been completely useless. What Rei cannot look at is her own parental failure, is the concrete proof that while protecting herself and her peace she did not protect her children too, because the two interests were never really aligned, even if she really believed so. She never had a functional family to preserve in the first place and everything she accepted to do was all for the sake of a false sense of belonging.
However is too easy to say she should've rebelled against Enji and dumped his sorry ass. Abuse traps you and your abuser too in a cage tricky to escape.
What I imagine will happen next chapter is one of two things:
Enji stops Touya by using brute force, probably also saying something really scarring to reinforce the notion that Shouto is the only child he cares about.
Rei stops Touya by using her quirk. This act could be considered by Touya another confirmation that even his mother actually does something by her own accord only when Shouto's safety is at risk
Necessary conclusions
I don't blame Rei for her actions too much. She is a victim turned abuser by circumstances, but more importantly she's actually taken mesures to prevent herself from hurting her children again. She's trying to heal for her family's sake, really this time. Ten years spent dealing with guilt and having actual therapy seem a good plan to me. And now she's the one ready to snap Enji back to reality.
Enji, on the other hand, is trying too. It's too little too late, but if he stops avoiding reality and hardly works on understanding his family's point of view I don't think he is completely unredeemable. I don't see him surviving his last confrontation with Touya, thought... But I could be totally wrong.
Obviously everything I've said it's my personal analysis on Rei's character, as I interpret her actions and words, so feel free to contradict me and/or to add anything you might see fit.
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Why won’t you comfort me?
Ray’s fic request, ‘Take them, they’re yours’, actually birthed two additional stories, ‘the way she’s pulling you in’ and this one. Both on completely different ends of the spectrum.
Grief, grief and more grief. I cried writing this. You’ve been warned.
Summary: The moment he’d lost his mother, he’d lost everything. Rating: T
This can also be found on AO3 and FFN. 
Enjoy?
The anniversary of a death, a birthday… Mother’s Day, they were all reasonable days to be upset, to be reminded of that person, be bogged down by the past and what could have been, maybe even cry.
But it hadn’t any of those days. It’d been a very normal day and all it had taken was one miniscule thing and a fleeting thought for it to all go downhill.  
It’d been stupid, really. One moment he was on his way to Nami’s orange tree late at night, perfectly fine, to pick some oranges for tomorrow morning and he’d caught whiff of Robin’s flowers. It had been quick, a fleeting moment, and he’d smelled them a thousand times before, but his brain had made the connection this time around.
They smelled like his mother.
She’d have them on her bedside table when he went to visit and although he hadn’t focused on it back then, he just used to remember thinking how nice it smelled there compared to the stale air of the castle.
That one smell threw him straight back to being a little boy, eagerly running to the hospital to see the one person that loved everything about him.
His Mum.
The moment he’d lost her, he’d lost everything.
Any scrap of happiness or freedom he’d had was gone. Gone was the person fighting in his corner for his father to leave him alone or to tell his siblings off when they were being particularly mean. But mainly, he’d lost his safe place.
Lost a place where he could go and be accepted for who he was with unconditional love and support.
Lost a person so dear to him, that his world had been shattered.
One day he’d been told she was gone and that had been it. There had been no further explanation, or condolences or someone to share his grief with. His siblings had looked at him like he’d lost his mind when he couldn’t control the tears streaming down his face, sobs racking his body, and his father had sneered down at him, not an ounce of compassion in his words or face as he was told to control himself, pull himself together.  
It’d been his mother’s handmaid in the end that had explained the following day, when he’d gone to her hospital room to check if it was just some cruel joke. She’d explained in the best way she could to a child that’d just starting to learn the harsh realities of the world. She’d said it had just been her time, that she’d gone peacefully, with a smile on her face and had told her so many times about how proud his mother had been to have had him.
She’d rubbed his shoulders, trying to comfort him as best as she could as he wailed at the empty bed, but she had to be respectful because of his title, which meant there was a foot between them, and he couldn’t bury his face in her shoulder like he’d wanted to. He’d appreciated the gesture, it was the most he’d received back then, yet all he’d thought about was how it lacked the warmth his mother’s touches held and how desperately he wanted to feel that again.
He never saw the handmaid after that day, and it had taken years after to figure out why.
After that, he hadn’t felt warmth for a long time.
As soon as he was deemed a lost cause, between his failure to keep up with his siblings and sporadic emotional outbursts that he couldn’t control, he’d been sentenced to the darkness. It had been cold and dark, although he’d been free to cry as much as he wanted without judgement.
And cry, he did.
Cried for all he’d lost, for where he was, for how he couldn’t save his mother or see her one last time. Couldn’t savour the last hug he’d had with her or memorise the way she’d smiled at him because he hadn’t known what was coming.
He didn’t even have a photo of her.
All of that had been taken away after her death, apparently, they didn’t need the distraction and it had been carried out with such ease, like she’d meant nothing. All he’d had back then was a drawing of her he’d made with charcoal he’d found in his cell and no matter how many times he’d tried; he could never capture the love in her eyes or the softness in her smile.
He wondered if his father had ever mourned for his wife. If he had, he’d never seen it.
He was lost in his grief, the tears pouring hot and fast, and he’d long given up on wiping his face, the sleeves of his shirt and collar already saturated. His childhood played in a loop in his head, and he was so out of touch that he missed the shuffle of feet drawing in closer behind him.
“Sanji-kun?” Shit. “Are you okay?”
And that was the was one woman in particular on board that would understand. Who had lost their own mother in the blink of an eye, in an instant had also lost their safe place after years of comfort and love and thrown into darkness against her will.
His back stiffened despite the soft words, all too aware of how back then this sort of behaviour would have earned him a backhand, and he only had a moment to pull himself together because he had to say something quickly.
“Of course, Nami-san.” His voice wobbled halfway through, and it sounded weak. “Is there anything I can get you?” He asked, in hopes of fooling her with his normal question.
“No, thank you.”
“Okay, well I’m going to bed soon, so I’ll see you in the morning.” The words were bitter in his mouth, from holding back his tears and for trying to dismiss her. It was for her own good though and that at least soothed him, she didn’t need to deal with his crocodile tears.
There was a pregnant pause and he wondered briefly if he’d somehow managed to convince her with his poor acting until he heard the shuffle of slippers closing in.
Of course he couldn’t fool her.
She sat down next to him and oh god. She was in her pyjamas. He was ruining her quiet evening; she’d only gone to the kitchen for some water.
He couldn’t look at her, he was pathetic sitting there crying like a child and maybe he hoped that if he was silent for long enough, she’d leave him. So she didn’t have to endure this.
Instead, she cupped his face, guiding him to face her and even though he complied, his eyes were still looking at the floor. She didn’t pay any mind to that though, her thumbs brushed along his face, chasing away the tears and drying his face. She pulled a tissue from the pocket of her shorts to wipe away at his nose and he burned with shame until he looked at her. There was no disgust on her face, no sneer for his sorry state, only kindness and understanding.
That look was enough for his eyes to well up again and her expression didn’t change, she didn’t look annoyed that he still wasn’t done or that cleaning his face had been fruitless effort when he was just going to cry again. Instead, she smiled, and her own eyes even looked a bit misty.
Her hands pulled away from his face and he almost wanted to chase after the affection until her arms opened to make a space for him in between them.
“It’s a one-time offer, surely you can’t pass that up?” She joked teasingly, wiggling her fingers for him invitingly.
He spluttered a laugh through his red rimmed eyes and errant tears at the normality of their relationship, how she wasn’t tiptoeing around him.
Hurriedly he scooted over and into her waiting arms, although he hadn’t needed to as her arms wrapped around him, drawing him in quickly as he curled into her embrace and tucked himself in the nook of her neck. It’d been so long since he’d had this and it was so familiar to the hugs from his youth, when he cried into his mother’s hugs as he told her about the cruel things his father or siblings had done on that particular day or laughed as she wrapped her arms around him as he sat in her lap, explaining his latest creation from his scrap book of cooking ideas.
For the first time in a long time, he could picture his mother’s face behind his closed eyes. He sobbed, shoulders heaving as he gasped for breath between his crying because it was all too much and exactly what he wanted at the same time.
He’d never been able to properly mourn her.
Belatedly, he realised Nami had started crying too, her frame shaking along with his and his hair dampening from her tears as they clung to one another fiercely. She didn’t ask or push for an answer or explanation for his state, she just let him cry into the nook of her neck, clinging to her desperately.
“I miss her,” he said eventually, voice quiet and raw.
“Who?”
He couldn’t get the words out, couldn’t get them past his throat where he felt like he was choking.
He didn’t need to though; she saw straight through him, she understood. “Your Mum?”
He nodded, feebly, pathetically, into her neck and a fresh wave of tears came over him.
“You’ve never told me about her.” She said softly, observationally. There was no pressure to elaborate, nothing in her tone forcing him but the option was there.
And he took it. “She was kind and warm. She’d listen to me talk about cooking endlessly and taste test and put in requests-”
‘And she loved who I was back then. Even when no one else did.’
He’d been holding himself together so far until his throat had seized up, the memories flooding in thick and fast. He sniffed, clearing his throat, trying to contain himself but it was in vain as new tears welled up and his head rested heavily on her shoulder in defeat as he lost the battle.
“Sorry,” he choked out, ashamed once again.
“Don’t be,” she soothed, no sign of irritation in her voice at having to reassure him for the umpteenth. “Tell me more about her, she sounds lovely.”
With her arms wrapped tightly around his shoulders, he realised that this was what he’d wanted back then. Not someone just rubbing his shoulders from a distance or trying to soothe him to stop the tears, but an actual hug as they let him cry without telling him to be brave or to be a big boy. It made the tears burn hotter and sadness surged out for his younger self.
Belatedly he realised, that as he talked and she listened, with her arms wrapped around him in comfort-
She was warm.
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I love Sanji’s backstory so much in case that wasn’t already obvious. I will find every angle imaginable to write about it.
I can’t remember who told me about this or where I saw it, but I heard a wonderful analogy for grief that even to this day I still think about, so I feel it’s fitting that I share it here. Grief’s like being in a room with a ball and a light switch, the ball is the person/event, and the switch is grief/sadness/pain. When it happens, that ball is huge, so huge that it’s constantly hitting the light switch. However, over time, that ball gets smaller and smaller, but it’s still bouncing around the room, so it means that it’s still going to hit the switch occasionally. Sometimes, by chance, it hits the switch constantly, even though it’s tiny and other times, it misses it for a long time, however, it’s always going to hit the switch at some point, no matter how small. It’s very simplified, but a few years ago I experienced grief in a big way, and it helped me make sense of it, so hopefully it’ll help someone else too.
As always, please forgive any errors.
Thanks for reading.
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leviiattacks · 3 years
Text
Two Faced | Chapter One
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↳ levi ackerman, the very person who was about to kindly behead you by a surprising turn of events manages to become your loving husband? you would be elated if this was true love, but it's all thanks to a mysterious magic spell that your life is spared. for now at least.
pairing :: duke!levi x duchess!reader genre :: royal au, angst, fluff, slice of life etc word count :: 2.6k → click here for the next part !
Shock-waves of terror rush through your body. You can feel your heart thump erratically against your chest and your train of thought is a complete mess. All you know for sure is that your fate is certain, you're going to die. The illegitimate daughter of the Rambova family from the Negri Republic is going to be killed and it just so unfortunately happens to be you. Your eyes are coated in a fresh layer of tears and all you can do is sit there huddled in the corner of your room whilst you pray. Pray to who exactly? You're unsure of that detail.
The days of pain and neglect that you constantly endured ended with the war caused by a single man. That man who was rumored to be cruel enough to murder the child of another enemy noble in cold blood. The Duke of the Paradis Empire. Levi Ackerman. By the emperor's orders he took an army to conquer all of the rebelling, independent countries which surrounded Paradis, and unfortunately for you the Negri republic was one of them.
Soon, the Rambova family was the last of the nobles left within the nation.
"Y/N. Even a little pest like you has a role to play. You must stay back and protect the castle." that was the first and last thing your father said to you when news of the war spread. Your father threw you away and so did the rest of your household. Not even a thank you was issued when they all dashed past you towards the palace's back gates. Truth be told you were simply a child born out of convenience, born to marry another aristocrat to strengthen the family's reputation, but the war made you see your position with even more clarity.
No one ever loved you in this palace, it would be futile for you to say they did, lying would not ease the numbing ache in your heart.
"SEARCH EVERY NOOK AND CRANNY!" One of Duke Ackerman's men alerts the other soldiers and that's when you begin to shiver in pure terror. The shrill screams of the palace maids can be heard and are more than audible, they echo back and forth, settling in the shells of your ears. You really are going to die today and no one's going to save you. Who would? The servants who laughed at you because of your shameful origin? Those servants seem to be at deaths door themselves, you don't hold anything against them. Or would it be your "family" who treated you like the dirt beneath the crevices of their shoes? That "family" had ditched you and left you for dead in the palace. Duke Ackerman was a wild animal and you were a piece of bait to everyone else. No one was going to help you and this was the end of the line.
You gaze out your window and see even more of his army approach. There's not enough time for you to run, even if you attempt to do so you'll be killed in no time at all. Your mother's words echo in your mind. No one was willing to keep her around. A toy, that's what she was for your father, a play thing on the sidelines for when his real wife wasn't well. A few years after giving birth to you mother had fell gravely ill but father did nothing to help. The money needed for her treatment wouldn't have even made a dent in his riches but he did not see it fit to spend such a large sum on the likes of her. He wasn't going to help a courtesan who refused to abort what he deemed a nuisance. That's what you and your mother were - problems, issues, nuisances and inconveniences he wanted nothing to do with.
But right now all you can think about are her last words. They ring in your head and you feel your tears creep right back up. However, they subside when you take the true meaning in.
"Listen carefully, when the grim reaper comes for you, act proudly and look him in the eye without fear. You must do so for me." the one time you had seen her force a smile was then, on her death bed she had smiled so daintily it felt fake. Why did she have to act strong even in her last moments? Why did she have to try her damnedest to hide her pain and suffering from you?
Without a seconds thought you decide to follow her last instructions and what she taught you. Deciding to look death in the eyes, it's the way your mother wanted you to leave. To die proud of yourself was a privilege she never received.
Shakily, you walk towards your dresser and throw on your best dress. It isn't amazing considering the fact that your father barely invested any time in you let alone any money but you made do with it. Tying the faded baby blue ribbon that came with it around your waist you play around with the frilled sleeves. Screams are all you can hear but you swallow away your fear. Putting your hair up into a bun and pinning it back as tightly as you can, your face is in full view now, you won't be able to hide behind your hair when you're finally taken away.
With faith and hope in your heart, that is how you choose to exit. Faith that after this something better was coming. An after life with mother, one where she would be treated the way she deserved. A place where you'd be able to see her smile in sincere clarity. As you stick the last pin into your hair the door to your bedroom rumbles. It takes a matter of seconds for it to be knocked down by three soldiers.
Two of them march towards you and yank you away from where you are in front of your mirror, in the chaos a vase full of flowers shatters and hits the floor. The sound of the glass shattering and hitting the marble floor only makes the situation more intimidating.
The soldiers drag you through the hallways of the castle and the way they grip tightly onto your arms irks you slightly. They're quite literally dragging you towards the slaughter house yet they continue to handle you and the other innocent people within the palace's walls with this degree of brute force. You know you don't deserve to die, nobody here does.
At some point you're thrown to the floor of the main hall, a pain shoots up your side due to the impact of your hip hitting the floor but you soldier through it. You try to look death in the eye but it beats you to it.
Multiple bloody corpses are scattered across the floor. A heap of them are piled up in one corner and your eyes water in defense. The Palace's head chef is one of the latest additions to this pile, her guts hang out, she's been sliced open mercilessly. The contrast between her current form and her usual stern but soft face haunts you.
This was your fate, your body was going to be hauled atop of this pile of corpses. How were you to die? Would you be cut up into bite sized pieces? Would your heart be ripped out of your chest, left to bleed out until you and death would meet?
You place your hands in front of you and they land on the floor as you raggedly breathe in and out trying to calm yourself down. Mother said death was scary but you never thought death would be delivered to you in the form of cold blooded murder.
Your haphazard thoughts are suddenly put to a halt when you hear a deep, gravely voice from above your head.
"Child of the Rambova Family." He pauses and your head shoots up to see who's addressing you.
Shaking once again the tears you've been holding back spill out. You are face to face with death himself, the grim reaper in human form. Duke Ackerman. His feline eyes are devoid of any emotion and he looks down at you through his eyelashes as though you're an animal.
Looking you up and down as if you're nothing but a pest you can't help but smile at that. Everyone thought of you that way, you weren't ever good for anything right? Your thoughts make you wallow in even more sadness and you burst into an extensive crying fit in front of the Duke himself.
He murmurs something inaudible under his breath then you see him swing his leg backwards. He savagely kicks your left shoulder and you fly towards the cold hard floor."You're oh so, stupid."  Shrieking, as his boot drives further into you, the lump in your throat hardens. "For not." another kick is delivered to you this time, it hits your right shoulder angularly. "Running away." a final kick lands on the left side of your face and despite his boots digging into the hollows of your cheeks you don't cry out in pain like you did the first time. That is until he swiftly holds you by the neck and firmly slams you up against one of the marble walls to perfectly punctuate his point. Letting go of you midway, you crash to the ground again, gulping and gasping for air.
His eyes. They're stone cold. You can't sense any emotion behind him. Yet he kneels down to your level his slim fingers trace the tear stains across your cheeks. The coarse but warm texture of his hand catches you off guard, you aren't accustomed to human touch and by reflex you unintentionally move slightly closer to his warm palm. He sneers at you absolutely disgusted with the way you react to his touch.
"It's a shame that you're objectively my kind of woman." His eyes snake towards the ribbon which cinches your waist in and the tension you feel increases ten fold. His gaze then meanders to your collarbone which is now crudely exposed after your one sided fight. His eyes darken "What a shame indeed." He mutters.
You begin to think that maybe the man above you has some pity left in his heart and you reach your hand out to possibly negotiate but before you can the fatal sound of him unsheathing his sword is heard.
Not even a knife can cut the tension in the air but somehow the words he shamelessly announce next manage to do just that.
"I shall give you the honor of having me personally see to your death."
Your life flashes before you eyes. He darts towards you and the cold edge of his sword is as close as it can be to your neck.
Don't close your eyes, Don't close your eyes. Look him in the eyes for the sake of mother.
Defiantly, you glare at him through the tears which mingle with the perspiration which coats your face. The tears rain down your cheeks and a droplet lands on his hand.
He flinches at the damp feeling but you see the grip he has on his handle harden.
You hadn't noticed in the previous frenzy and chaos but he's covered head to toe in blood, the ugly sight causes you to try and hold in your external reaction. But you can't fight away the tears, you clamp down on your lips so tightly that blood gradually trickles down your chin.
There were so many activities you wanted to try. You wanted to wear a beautiful dress, you wanted to fall in love, you wanted to marry, you wanted to see the world and all it had to offer. You wish as hard as you can for some sort of help some sort of release. You feel terrible because you aren't facing death in the eye. You aren't proud, you've betrayed your mother. Your blood and tears mix together and you swear you see a glint of something from the corner of your eye, but that's not the issue right now. You're about to die. This is real. This is all real.
You watch in fear as he swings his blade above his head preparing to end it all, right here, right now but suddenly a flash of white light illuminates your surroundings, you and the Duke are both momentarily blinded by it. The light morphs into an intricately beautiful symbol. Then, the clatter of his sword falling to the floor is heard. Your thoughts race, what on Earth is going on? At that moment a streak of light pierces through Duke Ackerman's chest and he groans in pain.
Pulsing from the pattern is a strange, bright light. You watch it flicker, changing colors from silver, to a misty white, then it suddenly weaves itself into a sky blue. You clench your fists, your nails digging deeper into your palms. Threads of silver then engulf both you and the Duke. You both become a part of the stunning floral designs. It's whimsical being trapped inside the kaleidoscope of colour, it's all so beautifully horrifying.
Out of nowhere both you and the Duke are flinged to the floor and the performance evaporates away. Curled up in a ball you're far too fearful to look up and see what has happened. You hear his voice again.
"My lady, please forgive me for my rudeness." The Duke murmurs his words and you can't make out whether or not he's being condescending or is genuinely apologetic.
Then he does the unthinkable, he falls down on one knee.
"And please allow me to receive the pleasure of marrying you." He sticks his hand out gracefully expecting you to hold it but you stare at him in pure horror.
"From the moment I saw you my heart was simple ensnared by your beauty." He holds onto your cheek affectionately, it feels different this time, you can feel the love practically spill out of his voice and touch but you're ultimately confused. He can't possibly love you, you're strangers. Oh, and he did try to decapitate you a few seconds ago.
His eyes are the definition of infatuation, they seem to glint with happiness even in the dimly lit hall and you have no idea what to say to this sudden confession. You don't even know where this confession has come from.
Then realization dawns on you.
It does sound impossible but it's really the only thing you can find remotely believable at this point.
Has someone perhaps cast a spell on the Duke? And is that someone, you?
You stare at his hand apprehensively and you know you've got no other choice. Even if he is joking and ridiculing you, at least you know you've tried to not fall directly into death's expectant hands.
"I...am yet to except. However, I shall give you a fair trial to court me." You awkwardly agree and place your shaky palm into this hoping he isn't fooling around. Much to your relief he isn't, you witness the man's eyes soften as he faintly kisses your knuckle.
Your surroundings are a landscape of dead bodies, you want to jerk your hand away from the monster in front of you, but your goal is survival.
Thinking about what exactly you have got yourself into, it doesn't seem to be pretty at all.
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anika-ann · 4 years
Text
The Best Mistake of My Life - Pt.1
Type: One-shot/ch1 of a series
Pairing: Steve Rogers x reader    Word count: 4100
Summary: A soulmate AU. They say having a soulmate is a blessing. Who wouldn’t love the idea of star-crossed lovers, right?
Neither Steve Rogers nor you consider yourself lucky though. It probably has something to do with the lines written on your skin. Because if the words are anything to go by, you’re not sure you want to meet each other.
Warnings: swearing, light angst, FLUFF 
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Steve Rogers was born a sickly baby.
Born a sickly boy to a single mother in the time of great depression, money thin, his health even thinner and having a pathetic number of friends; though that never really bothered him. What his friendships lacked in quantity was hundred times compensated by quality. Bucky Barnes’ loyalty was everything Steve could ask for.
And what Steven Grant Rogers himself lacked in height and strength of body was made up for by the strength of will, amount of determination and a great compassionate heart, ready to welcome anyone sans bullies there.
Perhaps God had seen that Steven would grow into a man carrying his heart on his sleeve and decided that this man should be blessed with a love so magnificent they would tell stories about it; people always had. People were always telling tales about soulmates.
Having a soulmate wasn’t necessarily rare, but not everyone was bound to have one. Being one of the lucky ones was an amazing gift; a promise of a connection as unbreakable as the thread of fate, a promise of an unconditional love.
To know person had found the one, their soulmate, those who were blessed with one wore a brand on their skin, a clue to allow them to recognize their destined partner; a set of words.
It was the set of words what was troubling Steve Rogers the most. Despite Bucky’s reassurance, despite his mother’s last words, despite Steve willingness to fight everything else the world would kick into his way, he found moments in his life he cursed the words written on his skin, reminding him how weak he would always seem to people.
Above the visible line of his collarbone, sticking out on his rather skeletal frame, there sat the words of doom:
‘Oh no, there must be a mistake.’
The very first time his soulmate would spoke to him… they would be disappointed and silently praying that whatever force was behind bounding souls together made one hell of a misstep. A mistake.
That was what Steve was going to be to his soulmate; a mistake. A failure. A disappointment.
And why wouldn’t he be? Ninety pounds of rattling bones, list of illnesses longer than his birth certificate…. Every girl Bucky had ever tried to set him up with out of pity (which Bucky would deny until his last breath) had been disappointed.
“Maybe she’ll be more into brunettes. Maybe she won’t believe her soulmate is blond at first,” his friend would say, “or she’ll be from Queens and wouldn’t get over the fact you’re not, but once you’ll show her the true Brooklyn charm, she’ll fall to your feet.”
Then he would always pat Steve’s shoulder, pulling him into a one-arm hug and tried to get him a date once more.
Steve didn’t believe him. He never did, but recognizing his friend felt better if Steve played along, he would smile and poke his ribs in return.
“Whatever you say. Jerk.”
Much later, when he said to Peggy Carter that he was waiting for the right partner to dance with, he was starting to admit to himself that he wasn’t thinking about his so-called soulmate as the one. After all, he went against all odds, against rules, against destiny itself when he had been accepted to the army regardless of his fragile body. Maybe, just maybe it meant that not ending up with his soulmate was what would happen one day.
When he crushed the Valkyrie to the ocean, not even having taken a chance on Peggy Carter despite her obvious interest, he must admit he had been lying to himself.
His last realization concerned his soulmate; despite wanting to fight against the whole world, he couldn’t make himself to take a chance on Peggy Carter, a brilliant woman who was not carrying the right set of words.
His last regret was that he would never meet his true love.
His last thought was that maybe, his soulmate never had a set of words spoken by him on her skin – her first words to him might as well be the ones spoken when reading his obituary, somehow knowing he was supposed to belong with her.
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The moment you were old enough to understand the meaning of the word ‘soulmate’, you were intrigued by the concept; it probably had everything to do with the fact that you too were supposed to have a person meant to be your other half.
Every parent was bound to be delighted when their child was born with that kind of blessing, but the older you were getting, the more you understood what kind of a shock might occur when a kid had rather strange line supposedly spoken to them by their universe-chosen partner for life.
There were people who had words like ‘shit’ on them; literally. Not very delightful. Sometimes there were general lines like ‘Hello, how are you?”. Good luck hunting down the right person. In contrary, some people had a name on them; ‘Hi, I’m Peter Cameron.’ Lucky bastards.
And then… then there were people like you, whose words were just… weird.  
“But I really am 95,” you mumbled under your breath, tracing the handwriting right under your collarbone subconsciously, the first thing you did in the morning if you remembered – which wasn’t every day, not by a long shot.
“This is the stupidest thing ever…”
You shook your head and started to get ready for your day at the office.
Your opinion on your soulmark had been changing during the years. You had had a period of fascination, simply being proud of carrying it. Then you had understood the meaning of your words, and you had been horrified and desperate at the idea of meeting your soulmate at such age or worse, having one that old while you would be thirty or something when encountering them.
Then had come the phase of how could I avoid having a grandpa as my soulmate. Maybe the number meant something different – your soulmate’s weight (you really wouldn’t care for that, you reasoned), his temperature (he might be hypothermic at the moment, no?), his hotel room number, the number of a seat in a theatre perhaps… there were so many possibilities, right?
Now, you just tried not to think about it too hard. You had had boyfriends, never lasting longer than few months sans the one exception of George, who had turned out to be the biggest asshole in the world despite your belief he had might have been the one; until you had caught him in bed with another girl.
Maybe it was that deep inside you had never believed in the relationships you had, because the guy never said the right first words. Or maybe you were full of shit and you couldn’t keep a guy interested, god only knew – hence not thinking about it too hard, going on with your life and taking it as it was.
You might meet him, you might not. It wouldn’t be the first case of never encountering a soulmate. Life was funny that way.
Best not to let it ruin your day. A rather nice day it was, today. If you only didn’t have to spend it in the crowded office with people demanding their licences and taking out their frustrations on you. Well. You were a grown-up; you had to be okay with things not always being okay. Which sucked. But that was life.
You had a chance to have a shortest coffee break to exchange ‘hello’s with Ryan – your actual favourite person in the world, your platonic ‘soulmate’ (not in the ominous sense of the word), your boss who never really acted like a boss – and that was it. Apparently, half of Manhattan had gotten their licence this very date years back, so the office was ridiculously crowded. Thank god for the glass between you and the jungle; it shielded you at least partly.
You grabbed the file of request no. 57 that day – you were like a machine, okay, you couldn’t remember the office ever managing to deal with so many in only three hours – pulling out the documents and the licence to make another driver happy.
Your hands were acting on autopilot and you didn’t even glance up when an ID was pushed to you through the small space between the glass and the counter, checking the renewed licence first.
Your first thought was ‘oh wow’. That guy on the photo was gorgeous. You couldn’t help but snap your head up, checking out the real-life thing.
OH WOW.
Scratch the ‘gorgeous’. Replace it with ‘unreal’.
You were tempted to ask if he was made by an ancient sculptor and then brought to life, because his body was as incredible as his face; the broadness of his shoulders begged for a touch. His muscular arms were not so hidden in the sleeves of his dark green shirt. The shoulder-waist ratio was clearly a God’s mistake, a one you were thankful for.
Forget ancient sculptures. His face must have been sculptures by angels and they left him with a halo of blond hair as a reminder. And his eyes. Oh god, such pretty eyes…
He gave you an unsure smile, opening his mouth to probably accuse you of staring and you quickly dropped your gaze, returning to check the licence before you would give it to him.  
Your hand froze hovering above the date of birth. You hesitantly looked up again, biting your lip guiltily despite not being the one who had messed up. You felt kinda sorry for him waiting the line for nothing.
“Oh no, there must be a mistake…” you half apologized, half said only to yourself, meeting his suddenly alarmed gaze.
You put on your most apologetic face, hoping he wouldn’t be too mad. How had someone messed it up again? The birth dates were with typos all the time. How?! There were only numbers for God’s sake! It wasn’t like the person inserting the data to the computer had to spell Buchwald or Mxyzptlk or something like that!
Damn you, Sheryl or Kira or you whoever have done this!
The man – Steven Grant Rogers, as you had learned from his sadly valueless driving licence – was staring at you, speechless. You were honestly getting worried, though you weren’t sure if you were more scared for him or for yourself in case of his reaction escalating.
So you went to explain.
“Uhm… I’m really sorry, mister-“ You quickly eyed the name ID he had given you, checking if the office got the name right at least. “-Rogers, but there seems to be a typo in… in your birth date. I apologize for the mistake our institution made, even though I wasn’t the one to-- you don’t need to know that, it doesn’t matter-- I’m so sorry you have to come here again, but I can’t really let you walk around or rather drive around with a licence claiming you were born in 1918, so…”
You had become so flustered, your cheeks burning, talking and talking without being able to stop, not making any sense even, until-
“But I really am 95,” he admitted sheepishly and you wanted to laugh at the ridiculousness of that statement, when something in your brain clicked.
The click was about as loud as an atomic bomb falling on Hiroshima. You were sure everyone had to hear it.
It shut you up immediately. Your whole body froze, your mind buzzing uselessly, not a single thought staying long enough for you to actually understand it. Until two words got stuck, shining in red letters like a neon sign in your brain.
Holy. Shit.
“Excuse me,” you squeaked, grabbing his useless licence and mechanically rising from your seat, walking away.
The moment no one could see you as you got into a hallway, you broke into a run. You acted on instinct. You ran and you ended up in front of Ryan’s office, stumbling in without knocking and without an atom of oxygen left in your lungs.
Ryan’s neatly combed hair swayed as he snapped his head to the door, his eyes strict until they took the newcomer – hint: you – in, widening instantly.
He quickly jumped to his feet, pacing to you.
“Hey, hey, what’s wrong?” he asked, voice filled with worries.
You weren’t able to answer, because—holy shit. Your eyes frantically scanned the room, unable to meet your friend’s gaze. “I-- I-“
A hand landed on your shoulder, your eyes immediately falling on it on instinct. Shit, you couldn’t breathe. Could you?
Ryan’s free hand found you chin, tilting your head so you faced him. “Hey, baby, look at me! What happened? Was someone too much of an asshole to you?”
“I’m not-- he’s-“
Ryan’s face screamed concern, but he had fixed it in a second, soothing smile on his lips. He led you to his sofa, the calming blue cushions enveloping you.
“Sit down on your ass and gimme that,” he maneuverer the document off the steely grip of your fingers, sitting next to you as he looked it over. “Huh, quite a looker this guy. So what did he do?“
“I—the- the licence says he was born in---in 1918,” you stammered, finally able to breathe in properly and speak.
Ryan squinted at the date and then rolled his eyes.
“Oh jeez, again? Why is it so hard to just get it right? I swear I’m gonna have to fire Sheryl, she’s a disaster. What’s wrong with her? It’s not like they would be making a licence for someone that old! There’s a photo goddammit!”
“Ry-Ry… he said he was 95.”
Another eye-roll was his answer. “Yeah, I can count. He would have been if he was born in 1918 instead of 1981.”
“No, you don’t-“ you licked your lips and swallowed against the lump that grew in your throat. Your voice was as shake as your hands. “He just told me that. That he really was 95.”
Your friend observed you silently for a beat, not following. And then realization hit him like a train.
“Oh. OH. No shit?!”
It was your turn to stare silently, your mind loud enough to make noise and fill the space of Ryan office.
“Damn, does he really look like that? Lucky bitch!”
“Ryan!” you yelped in surprise when his fist bumped your shoulder, almost knocking you off balance.
It worked though. It grounded you and threw you back to reality. You tried your best to calm your breathing, but damn. This guy… he was your soulmate. You just met your soulmate. And he wasn’t a grandpa. He didn’t weight 95 pounds either. You weren’t in a hotel, neither in a theatre.
No. The number was only about one tiny mistake— oh, ohhh shit, what was the first thing you had said to him? Oh fuck. Way to go, girl!
“Are you okay?” Ryan asked rubbing the spot he had punched.
“No!” you shot back immediately, your mind racing.
“You know what I mean. You look better now. Though I gotta say, so is he. His face really is quite easy on the eyes. How about the rest of him?”
Ry-Ry, your bi-side is showing.
You chuckled at the easy talk, the tension from your shoulders falling a bit.
“Well… yeah, he’s like a model. So out of my league…” you muttered, remembering your ogling. This guy was your soulmate? Wasn’t it a mistake?
Ryan was suspiciously quiet; normally you would expect him to scold you for selling yourself short. Instead, he was staring at the licence, his lips parted in silent shock.
What now?
“What?” you demanded, following his line of gaze.
Ryan just chuckled, the incredulous sound ringing, echoing in the quiet space. “Girl, I hate to break it to you, but I might not fire Sheryl just yet.”
Your eyebrows shot up. “What?”
“Remember that one time aliens were falling from the sky?”
You blinked in surprise at that question, not following his train of thoughts. “Uhm… yeah? Pretty hard to forget that…?”
You were lucky you hadn’t been smashed under a building that day. Many people in Manhattan were, some sadly not. So yeah, you remembered.
“You remember the waitress from the café talking after the incident?”
“Oh my god, Ry-Ry, just spill it! I’m not following!”
Your friend huffed in exasperation, shoving the licence in your face, his finger on the name.
Steven Grant Rogers. Yeah, you could read too.
“That name should ring a bell, you dumbass! Would you say that this guy is handsome enough to be Captain America?” he hissed, making your heart stop.
Oh. Oh shit.
OH SHIT.
Your brain short-circuited.
“Oh my god. He really is 95,” you breathed out, your brain somehow choosing the least logical reaction to this whole revelation.
Ryan laughed. “Ding-ding, we have a winner! Holy crap, baby, I think you just got yourself a superhero soulmate!”
And just like that, you started panicking again. You gulped, watching the driving licence as if it could blow up.
“Shit, Ry-Ry! What do I do?” you whispered, desperation soaking through. What were you supposed to do upon that revelation? Captain America was your freaking soulmate!
Ryan smiled at you reassuringly, patting your cheek. “Not coming back to your spot behind the counter today, that’s for sure.”
“But-“
“I’m going in. I think this place won’t blow up if I fill in for once. I sure hope I remember the process, though I’m probably not gonna be as efficient as you are.”
You didn’t know what to say. Hell, you didn’t know what to do! But yeah, not coming back to the jungle sounded good, especially given your frantic escape.
“You really would do that?” you asked hesitantly and Ryan just rolled his eyes. “But… Ryan, what the hell do I do?!”
Your bestie gave you a lopsided smile and a wink, patting your cheek patronizingly once more before heading to take over your workplace.
“Whatever you want, baby. Whatever you want.”
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While you were having your own freak-out, Steve was standing at the counter, dumb-struck.
He couldn’t believe it. You had actually said those words. And judging by your reaction to his own, he must have said yours. Which… yeah, congratulation, Rogers, you had given your Universe-chosen dame an amazing note on her skin. To be fair, so had she.
Incredible.
Impossible.
His soulmate was in this century. In this millennia. That was what he got for ever thinking he could escape fate; a slap right in his face.
Because while for several cherished moments, he basked in the light on his soulmate not considering the pairing with him the infamous mistake the words on his skin claimed… he soon learned that it didn’t mean no heartbreak for him.
You had taken an abrupt leave to the back of the office and never came back.
Few minutes later, a man emerged from the door you had disappeared into, taking your seat and without a second look on Steve’s ID, he explained that Steve would have to come here again.
Steve didn’t care for the process of getting his driving licence renewed in the slightest, barely listening. His gaze was at the door to the hall, opened ajar, the door you didn’t return from after learning he was meant to be your partner.
When he had seen you behind the desk, he had considered you a beautiful dame, certain his heart had skipped a beat when your eyes met his. The sight of you was burned into his brain, now forever as a painful memory.
Clearly, you didn’t want him. Not because he was sickly, 95 pounds or 5’7’’ or all bones. Not because your words to him were about a mistake. Not because he was from Brooklyn. No. Honestly, Steve didn’t know why, what could scare you off so soon. He just knew you had escaped at the mere sight of him.
With his mind fuzzy, he walked out of the building into the bright nearly midday sun, blaming the sharp rays for the sting in his eyes. He sighed, running his hand down his face, suddenly bone tired.
“Mr. Rogers?” a shy female voice addressed him, instantly making him turn around to its source.
His lips parted in awe. There you stood, your airy floral dress reaching your knees, played with by the softest breeze. Hesitant smile on your lips. A tiniest spark in your eyes as he subconsciously took two steps to you, just to prove you would still be there if he came closer. You didn’t disappear.
“Y-yes?” he stuttered, actually feeling like the small man he had used to be before the serum.
You quietly introduced yourself, meeting his eyes once more, effectively stopping his heart again. You offered your hand for him to shake and he, feeling like he was dreaming, something else possessing his body, kissed your knuckles as he would have done if meeting you seventy years ago.
The most adorable heat warmed your cheeks at the gesture and you casted your gaze down; but Steve did catch a glimpse of the earlier spark shining brighter before you hid yourself from him
“I… I believe we have a lot to talk about,” you whispered and he instinctively gave your hand a gentle squeeze before letting go and shifting a half step closer to you. The corners of his lips unwittingly turned up, something warm building up in his chest as you returned the smile with hesitance.
“Yes, I think we do.”
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Nicolas J. Fury was sitting in his office, waiting for the door to finally open. There was something bugging him – and that something was about 5’7’’ tall, had red hair and was doing whatever it wanted, messing with his business. On top of that, she left him waiting; he had requested her ten minutes ago and she still hadn’t arrived.
He couldn’t help but let his sarcasm show when she came eventually.
“Agent Romanoff. Thank you for coming. Now, care to explain me why did you insist on Rogers getting his driving license renewed in person when we have done it for him already?” he demanded, leaning forward and resting his elbows on his desk.
The agent just shrugged. “He needs to meet people.”
“Don’t give me this shit, Natasha! What are you not telling me?”
Slow smirk spread Natasha’s lips, perhaps a bit smug, but she didn’t say a word.
“Romanoff-“
“Alright! Jeez, Nick, you have to work on your patience when it comes to Rogers, I swear…” she teased him. However, at least she started talking. “I might have run his… words through the system Stark provided us.”
Realization dawned to Fury. There was only one system she could be talking about. The soulmate matching one. Insert the words of a person and it would search the database for a possible match; everyone’s words were being put into the database at their birth. It made SHIELD’s work easier in case criminals happened to have a soulmate; the connection was so unique it usually offered a weak spot even for the rotten people.
Nicolas Fury raised his eyebrow expectantly, while Natasha just watched him, amused as she had the upper hand. The man rolled his functioning eye and sighed exasperatedly. Why was he keeping her around again? Oh right, she was his best agent.
“Fine. Did you find a match?”
Natasha snorted. “I didn’t even have to look for a match. There aren’t many women with ‘But I really am 95’ written on their skin,” she explained dryly and Fury just wanted to growl, cursing mentally.
How had no one thought about using the database in the first place?! It had cost them a lot of money, okay? They had it for a reason!
“She clean?” he inquired instead or swearing out loud and Natasha scoffed.
“Like a whistle, not even a speed ticket, which is rather ironic. She’s boring, really – she’ll be perfect for him. Can I go now? I have an ass to kick.”
“…Rogers’?”
“Barton’s, actually. Have a good day, Director,” Natasha spun on her heels and headed to the exit gracefully.
“Hey, I want her file!” Fury complained, already knowing he wasn’t going to receive it from her.
“Find it yourself!” she threw over her shoulder cockily, her red hair swirling with the sudden movement of her head.
The director of SHIELD tried to keep his amusement in check, controlled by the irritation, but he lost. The corners of his lips twitched as the door clicked behind his best spy.
Why did he keep her around again?
He started the search for the words Natasha had said, sinking into his chair comfortably.
Alright, no doubt future Mrs. Rogers. Let’s see how boring you really are.
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Part 2 (originally this was only meant a one-shot)
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Tags: @cxptain @mermaidxatxheart @smilexcaptainx​
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Thank you for reading!!
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evanoracronwell · 3 years
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Life as he knew it
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Chapter 2 - What’s next?!
Buddie♥
“I’m your father. And I already love you so much, little girl. You’ll see, we’ll be fine. I promise I will be the best father in the world for you."
Also on ao3 (2/?)
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Driving through the streets of Los Angeles took more than an eternity and Buck is sure that he exceeded the permitted speed limit several times. His heart was beating so fast that felt as if it would come out through his mouth any second.   A reception desk in green tones appeared in front of his eyes as soon as the elevator doors opened on the 3rd floor of the north tower, and he breathed slowly and deeply, trying to calm himself down as much as possible in the face of this situation.   This bizarre and completely surreal situation.   All of this had to be a huge, ridiculous, joke; and one in bad taste, at that there was no chance that the information he’d been given on the phone was true.   "Excuse me,” he went to the reception desk and a nurse smiled at him. "I'm looking for Taylor Kelly's room"   "Oh dear ...” she replied, her smile immediately fading and the sad look that appeared on her face causing Buck to swallow. "Room 312, in the corridor on the right"   He thanked her and turned down the hall looking for the room. Buck tried to ignore the sadness he’d seen in the receptionist's gaze when he had said who he was here to see and walked at a quick pace until he found the room number. Taking a deep breath once more, he knocked lightly at the door and waited for an answer before opening it. Upon entering the room, he saw a woman dressed elegantly in a black suit, sitting on a sofa just below a large window and in the center of the room a bed where Taylor Kelly was sitting with her back against the headboard and an extremely bored and impatient expression on her face.   "Well ... finally, Buckley."   "Is it true? Did you really give birth to a girl? My daughter?"   "Obviously not, Buckley. I needed a break and I thought a room in the maternity ward was an excellent idea. What do you think, genius?  
"So why didn't you come to me before? Damn, Taylor, you should have told me you were pregnant! I would have helped you and stayed with you all of these months."   "Please, the last thing I would do was look for you, and I definitely wouldn't want you around for months. If I had suspected for a second that this pregnancy was your fault, believe me, I wouldn't have allowed it to get this far.   "I ... shit, Taylor ... what the fuck is all this?!"   "Shit is a good way to describe the fucked mess up that my life has become because of you."   "Because of me? I don't even know what's going on here, Taylor; a woman called me ... your attorney, which I believe is you, right?”He looked quickly at the woman on the couch who just nodded without saying a word.   "And she told me that you just gave birth to a girl and now you blame me, as if I did it on purpose?"   "Damn it, I had everything very well planned, Buckley, everything was perfect and then you came and fucked it up ..."   "I don't understand. What do you mean that you had it all planned out, Taylor? Tell me what's going on here."   "I was dating the owner of the station I work for. I spent three months Buckley, three damn months fucking that unbearable and pathetic old man, acting like I was in love, all so I would get pregnant and guarantee a good future for myself at the station. When that asshole went on vacation with his wife, I wanted to enjoy it; a weekend to go out and have some good sex. Then I see you, and I think "great, I won't even have to bother to seduce anyone” One fucking night, Buckley, that honestly wasn't even as good as I remembered, and you ruined the perfect life that I had planned. "   "Wait a minute, you were having an affair and trying to get pregnant, probably without this guy knowing, just for what? Blackmailing him into a promotion at the station?"   "Obviously, Buck. Or did you think I would want him to marry me? Of course not, what I wanted was to be the anchor of a news program on TV. Something much more important than that shit they gave me after I got out of the traffic news. "   "You are unbelievable... I really can't believe I'm hearing this."   "Oh, I'm so sorry, did you wish I was crying with happiness with the little bundle of joy in my arms? Spare me, Buckley, the last thing I wanted in my life was to have a kid ruin it. That baby was an investment that, thanks to you, didn't work out. "   "But ... we used a condom. Dammit, Taylor, we only had sex once and we used the damn condom. They’re 98% effective!”   "Well ... that 2% came back to bite me in the ass."   "You just said you spent months with that guy, Taylor, how can you be so sure it's mine? It doesn't make any sense."   "Well, to start with, he's black and the baby was born as pale as a ghost, with blue eyes and, I mean, if that wasn't enough, she also inherited that ridiculous birthmark from you. He may be stupid, but not so much that he would believe that the kid was his "   "I can't believe this ... I ... fuck, I have no idea what to do."   "You better figure it out quickly, Buckley, because I don't have much time to lose. Tomorrow, I have a flight to catch and I'd rather die before missing it."   "What do you mean, a flight? Taylor, you can't tell me that you just gave birth to my daughter and then say that you're leaving. I'm not going to let you take my daughter away from me."   "Oh dear, this would be lovely if I wasn't so angry right now. What makes you think I'm going to be taking the girl with me?"   "Wait, what?"   "Listen here, Buckley; it's very simple, so pay attention. This whole baby story may have gone wrong for me, but I wouldn't play all my cards in just one hand. I documented all possible evidence of Scott's affair with me, and thanks to that, I got him to hook me up with a great job in Washington; a direct correspondent at the White House, with a chair and everything. So, I'm leaving tomorrow for my bright future, and this kid definitely has no place in it. "   "You can't be serious, Taylor; this is your daughter."   "Oh no, right now she is just your daughter, and depending on your decision, she might not be that, either."   "What do you mean, my decision ?!"   "Mr. Buckley, if I can?”The woman, who Buck sincerely forgot had been there, got up from the couch and walked to the center of the room with a folder in her hands. “Ms. Taylor contacted me yesterday as soon as the child was born and informed me of what happened. Following her orders, I have in hand a document stating that you and only you are the child's guardian exempting my client from any responsibility or bond to the child and to you. "   "What?"   "If you do not agree to raise the child, we already have contact with two families who would love to adopt her."   "One of them is even in Italy; the farther the better.” Taylor replied, still extremely annoyed and impatient.   "Are you fucking kidding me now? How the hell did you get these documents and two families in less than 24 hours?"   "Money makes everything move faster Buckley, and a friend of mine works with an agency that specializes in adoption. Now, just make up your mind because, as I said, the last thing I have is time and patience."   "Of course, I am going to raise my daughter! Not even for a second would the possibility of not raising her cross my mind."   "Well then, sign the papers and go be a daddy !!"   "Taylor listen to me, you should just calm down and think about this l. I know that now you don't want to be a mother, but in a while, you might regret it and ..."   "My only regret, Buckley, was going to that bar and having sex with you. Although, honestly, when I think about it, maybe I should thank you. After all, being a direct correspondent in the White House is definitely better than being a TV news anchor here in Los Angeles. But don't even think for a second that it means I want to be part of this child's life; any purpose that she could have for me has already been fulfilled, Buckley, and let's leave it at that "   "But, what if you want to be a mother someday ... Taylor, you can change your mind..."   "If I ever decide to become a mother, you can believe me it will be a much better reason than the cliché of maternal instinct, Buckley. Now, please. You made your decision and I’ve made mine. Sign the papers and we will end this conversation."   "You know what, fine, but I want a guarantee that you won't show up sometime in the future and take my daughter away from me. If you want to go that way, then it's forever, without regrets."   "Please, that would never happen."   "So what? Should I just take your word for it?"   "I can draft a document ensuring that it doesn't happen, Mr. Buckley, and I will personally hand it over to you, signed, tomorrow, before Ms. Kelly leaves for DC."   "Great ... everything’s settled and everyone’s happy; now get out of my room, Buckley. I already left all the papers signed regardless of knowing what your choice would be. Although, honestly, I should have imagined it would be this one; you always were extremely needy."   "And you've always been a heartless, unscrupulous bitch. I hope you have a terrible time in DC."   Without saying another word, and not wanting to allow her to respond, Buck strode out of the room and closed the door with a little more force than he should have, then leaned against the wall. His knees felt so weak and shaky that he was afraid of falling to the floor. He closed his eyes and threw his head back against the wall, pulling the air into his lungs as he tried to calm the agitated beating of his heart and the anger that ran through his body while trying to wrap his head around what had just happened.   Fuck ... he had a daughter.   "Mr. Buckley ?"   A soft, low voice came from his side and Buck opened his eyes to see the attorney, who had just closed the door, standing right next to him.   "Olivia Mason, right?"   "Yes, sir"   "Buck ... just ... Buck."   "Okay, Buck. First of all, I would like to say how sorry I am about the whole situation. Despite being Ms. Kelly's attorney, I admit I don't agree with everything that is going on. Having said that, we should be concerned about having you sign all necessary documents to take custody of your daughter. "   "What exactly is in these documents?"   "It says here that Ms. Kelly gave up the child's shared custody, thereby making you solely responsible for any family decisions. A unilateral custody, Buck, with some additions specifying that Ms. Kelly does not wish to be sought out, either by the child or by you, whatever the situation may be. Think of it this way, Buck; Taylor Kelly was just the surrogate for your daughter, and now any decision regarding the child's life must be and will be made only by you. "   "And with the document I asked for, will she also be unable to contact my daughter?"   "Yes; as I said, for all intents and purposes, she was just a surrogate."   "I can't believe that she really said all that."   "I imagine that all of this must come as quite a shock to you ."   "Yeah ... you could say that. Look, I appreciate, what you did and also that you’re going to help keep her out of my life, and if what she’s paying you doesn't cover it, then I’ll guarantee your payment myself and ... "   "Don't worry; I have to confess that when she came to me and specified what she wanted, I made sure that I was charging twice as much as I normally do."   "Well ... she deserves it."   "Why don't you keep these papers and think about everything that happened today, and tomorrow I’ll bring you the other document and have you sign it. Inside the folder is my contact information; send me your address and any questions you may have, and I will be happy to answer them. "   "Thank you .... seriously, just ... thank you."   "You should go and meet your daughter, Mr. Buckley,”she replied, and with a gentle smile walked away down the hall.   She was right. He had a baby to meet.   His daughter was ... beautiful; just the most beautiful thing Buck had seen in his entire life.   Taylor was right, apart from a slight red tone in the blond curls, she was all Buck.   The nurse who had walked him down the hall to the nursery smiled through the glass as she lifted the baby high enough that he could see her even at this distance, and then she nodded and disappeared through a door, with Buck following until he reached a reserved room with a few armchairs. The nurse instructed him to wash his hands and Buck did so immediately.   “This is a breastfeeding room, but it’s rarely used, since we prefer to leave the babies with their parents as long as possible. You can stay here with her for a while; we just fed her with the bottle so it won't take long for her to fall asleep.   She placed the baby in Buck's arms, who took her with the greatest care in the world, arranging the child affectionately and snuggling her against his chest.   "What do you mean a bottle? Taylor didn't have any milk?"   "From what I understand, Mr. Buckley, Ms. Kelly simply decided not to breastfeed her daughter. I'm very sorry; I heard about what happened. I was in the room trying to convince her to breastfeed when she talked to the attorney about the child. "   "I can't believe she didn't even want to breastfeed her daughter. But she's fine, right? Is my daughter healthy?"   "Yes, sir. She's a full 7.5 lb and 18 inches of cuteness. Perfectly healthy and beautiful."   "Yes, she is."   Buck looked at the baby, who opened her eyes to look directly at him with a huge pair of curious blue eyes, which made him immediately fall in love with the girl. He would do anything, would give the world for her without the slightest hesitation.   "I'm going to leave you to sit alone with your daughter. The chairs all have a call button on the side; if you need anything, just press it, and a nurse will come over to help you."   "Thank you."   "There’s no reason to thank me l, Mr. Buckley, I ..."   "Just Buck,” he interrupted her with a smile.   "Buck, right. I'm Emily; it's a pleasure to meet you. I must inform you, though, that the child hasn't been named yet; we haven't even managed to put the mother's last name on the nursery ID. Just the room number."   "Taylor didn't even name the baby? Guess I shouldn't be surprised."   "I am very sorry. Anyway, the baby will be discharged from the nursery tomorrow, and we will need to print the birth certificate. We’ll need a name, and also your personal data, Buck."   "Yes, of course, I ... I don't have a name planned; I didn't even know I needed one until a few minutes ago. Can I take the day to think about it?"   "Of course; as I said, I know the situation and I understand how confusing everything must be at this point. But if you would allow me to be nosy, you seem to have made an extremely important decision that will change your life in a way that you can’t even imagine ... and yet, I didn’t see any fear in your eyes. "   "Well ... I can guarantee that I'm terrified of being a father."   "Oh, I know, all parents always are. This is normal, Buck, but you have the look of someone who is afraid of not being a good father. That’s the first step in becoming an excellent one"   She smiled again and then walked out of the room, leaving Buck alone with the child in his arms.   He walked comically slowly for fear of hurting the child until he sat down in one of the armchairs and then settled her more comfortably in one arm while gently touching her cheek with his finger.   "She was wrong, you know? Your birthmark is beautiful, just like the rest of you. Jesus, girl, you’re going to give me a lot of trouble when you grow up, aren't you? Look at you! You're so beautiful"   He smiled when she grunted, making a face - which Buck definitely thought was a toothless smile - and then she grabbed Buck's finger, making the fireman blink as the tears fell from his eyes and his voice failed him.   “I’m your father. And I already love you so much, little girl. You’ll see, we’ll be fine. I promise I will be the best father in the world for you." 
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When Buck parked his Jeep at his building, he was exhausted. He looked like he had just worked a long shift filled with difficult calls. Getting out of the hospital and leaving his daughter behind was the hardest thing he had had to do in his entire life, but he knew it was necessary. In less than 24 hours, he would have a baby to raise in an apartment that wasn’t prepared in the slightest to receive her. He needed to buy clothes, a crib, and countless other things that a baby needed, Buck, honestly, had no idea what most of those things were.   Which was exactly why he sent a message to the 118 group before having even left the hospital asking everyone to go to his house. He sent separate message to Eddie asking him not to just open his house for everyone but also, for him to text Carla asking her to go too, Because God knows he was going to need all the help he could get. And with the speed at which everything had to be arranged for the arrival of his daughter, the last thing he needed now was to waste time telling people separately, so the best idea was to bring them all together and tell them all at once.   When he opened the door to the loft he was immediately greeted with various exclamations of concern from all his friends, and then a small - yet incredibly strong - Maddie Buckley throwing herself into his arms, hugging him tight enough that he could hardly breathe.   "Evan, thank God! We are all worried after your message. You asked us to come here without explaining anything else!"   "I'm sorry, I should have said something more. I'm fine, Maddie, I swear."   "So ... what happened, Buckaroo,” Athena asked, equally concerned.   "Well ... I have a daughter"   "I'm sorry. You have what now ?!"
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theirgrief · 3 years
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time passed at a different speed on the other side. or perhaps that is what it felt like to her because she’d been fed so many lies by the elders who had sacrificed her life to restore their powers. elodie didn’t even know for how long she’d been gone at this point. all she remembered was that she had just turned sixteen when she’d been approached by her family, asking her to partake in the ritual. they’d made it out to be an honorable deed, like she was acting for the greater good. not a single soul had been brave enough to speak up against the elders and tell the young girls the truth; mostly because some had not believed in the harvest, and others had simply been too selfish to stand up for what is right. instead they’d all watched as the life flooded out of their bodies. all except for one, sophie deveraux, the aunt of one of the other girls, who had brought a vampire, the one who’d end up being the reason for why their deaths had been pointless.
elodie had been the second in line. she remembered smiling at her mother, the woman who had given birth to her and raised her and who had had no trouble seeing her get killed by their own kind. she remembered as one of their eldest held a knife to her friend’s throat and slit it open without the blink of an eye. she remembered the anxiety coursing through her veins as realization hit her, that they’d been lied to, that they needed to be killed in order to complete the sacrifice. she remembered screaming for help, for her mother to save her before it was too late, and the tears streaming down her face as she watched her mother remain silent. and lastly, she remembered waking up alone in a cold and dark place with strange figures.
the last thing she wanted to do when she was resurrected almost a year after the ritual took place was to see the very people who had betrayed and manipulated her; who had proven to her that their powers were worth more than her life. as if she’d still be able to feel safe around them, or loved, or protected, or any of the things she was supposed to feel around her family. the only person elodie wanted to see was the one person she felt like she could trust; clay, her best friend. with no recollection of how long she’d been gone or what had all happened during that time, she honestly just assumed that it might have been not more than just a couple of weeks, maybe months, and that not that much had changed. when davina joined them on the other side, she’d learned a little bit, but not far enough to be fully up to date. all she really cared about was for things to go back to the way they were, but she knew she’d never have that. it was far too late for that and now all she could hope for was to find shelter and comfort at clay’s and to be able to heal and move on from this; perhaps even deal with this mess before her coven tried to force her to come home. clay always made her feel okay, and all she wanted was to be okay after experiencing death. elodie could only hope he wouldn’t ask questions. as she arrived at the place, she looked up at the door and hesitated for a moment before she took a deep breath and raised her hand to knock.
                                     ------------ @hallowqueenwrites​​
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