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#I’ll never know a love more than this you’re a part of me mal
thepagesofphia · 1 year
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“may I?
yes”
shadow and bone season 2 episode 6 thoughts and reactions
spoilers in the tags
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straykeedz · 8 months
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day 6: felix + double penetration in two holes
©straykeedz
tw: female anatomy; softdom!felix; usage of a butt plug; mentions of oral sex (f receiving); mentions of rimming (f receiving) and anal fingering (f receiving); clit play; felix leaving hickeys; felix spanks reader on the ass literally once; unprotected piv sex (don’t do that at home 🤨); protected anal intercourse (f receiving); fingering (f receiving); aftercare; ♡
this is honestly pure filth i’m sorry…
wc: 3k;
this is part of my kinktober masterlist. you can find my regular masterlist here (tho it will not be updated until the end of kinktober) ♡
🔖 (open): @linos-kitten ; @luneskies ; @kxcies-blog ; @idunnomanmynamewastaken ; @cessixja ; @stolasisyourparent ; @kookiesbunny ; @xoxo-xoxo-bunny ; @ivyskzsworld ; @mal-lunar-28 ; @leetaste ; @sunnykynnie ; @channiesgoodgirl ; @seonghwatoothless ; @mrsminho ; @seungminluv3 ; @jin-from-the-block ; @aaasia111 ; @sulkygyu ; @whosanaanyway ; @y-ur--I ; @vixensss ; @nightimescapes ; @freckleboilix ; @dreamingaboutjisung ; @yourbeomiebear ; ♡
to make sure i add you to the taglist, your age must be clearly visible on your profile. also, empty blogs will not be added - add at least a profile picture to your blog so that i’ll know you’re not a bot. ♡
smut below the cut, minors dni.
❤︎
Isn’t it funny - the way everyone thinks your boyfriend is a literal angel on earth and the most composed guy ever when really, he’s a freak in the sheets? You think it is. 
After all, they don’t know about what you two do when you’re alone - in the confines of the walls of your shared apartment They don’t know how he spends most of his time with his body between your legs, buried deep inside of you, they don’t know how kinky he is, always coming up with new things to try in bed with you. Not that you mind, of course. Plus, you really love the fact you’re the only one to know this side of his, it makes it even more special. 
Felix turns into an entirely different person when sex is involved. 
Forget the cute smiles and his innocent eyes, forget how graceful and delicate he looks - he ruins you every time. The first time you discovered Felix’s tendency to be dominant and basically a fucking pornstar in bed, was actually the first time you guys had a fight and, well, it was the best make up sex you ever had. Ever. Bent over the drawer in your bedroom as he took you from behind, fingers entangled in your hair, tugging at it as he whispered the filthiest things in your ear. Needless to say - you came hard and fast that night. 
It’s a paradox, isn’t it? How can someone be that cute and fuck that hard at the same time? It should be illegal, but in the end you came up with the conclusion that he simply is the jackpot, and that no matter how hard you try - you’ll never find someone better than him. Not that you want or feel the need to, anyway. 
Today is no exception. Once again - acted all cute and sweet in front of his friends and then turned into a complete animal the minute you found yourselves alone at home. 
“You were such a good girl for me tonight…”, he mutters against your skin as his lips kiss their way from your breast to your navel, then to your lower abdomen, stopping right before they could brush the soft skin of your molds. Then, you feel his fingers on you - on your inner thighs first, then closer and closer to your core. However, he doesn’t go for your pussy - instead, he directs them to your other hole, the pads of his digits tapping lightly the metal bud that’s pressed against your skin. “Wearing this during movie nights with the boys and having to sit still…”, he sucks in a breath. 
He’s referring to the butt plug he’d asked you to wear tonight of all nights. It’s actually your first time trying it after Felix suggested it a couple of weeks before, and his eyes practically sparkled when you agreed to his idea, and it’s your first time letting Felix access you other hole, too, but since you trust him with your life you figured why not? 
The feeling is pleasant - you discovered. At first, you were scared it’d hurt or feel uncomfortable or that you simply wouldn’t like it, but Felix made sure you were relaxed enough for it before pushing the plug in your hole. He spent a good thirty minutes down there - making you cum with his tongue on your clit first, to ease some of the tension. Then, his tongue found its way to your rim, lapping and sucking on the sensitive skin of your hole until you were practically begging him to use his fingers. By the time he pushed his first finger inside of you, you were already a panting mess beneath him. 
“Did it feel good?”, he asks you, still staring at the plug in awe, biting his lower lip as he finally brings his digits to your slit, pleased to find it wet already. “Oh - it seems like it did.”, he chuckles, eyes meeting yours, your cheeks a bit red, you’re clearly embarrassed to be caught red-handed. “Mhh, did you like the feeling of having your ass stuffed while we were at Chan’s?”, his voice is low as he speaks, his fingers pressing unexpectedly on your clit now, making your body jolt.  
If Felix asks you a question in bed, you answer it. That’s the rule. 
So you nod. “Yes.”
“Naughty girl.”, he chuckles once again, rubbing slow, lazy eights on your clit. “My naughty girl.”, he growls, as the movements on your sensitive nub become faster as if he wants to get you off, when really, you know this is not his true intention - he just want to tease you until you’re begging for his cock. “Want to fuck you so bad.”, he mutters against your skin, kissing your inner thigh as he keeps playing with your clit. 
“Please…”, you whisper, when his lips start to suck on your skin - he’ll surely leave a mark. 
He does it often, leave marks on your body - in places only you and him can see. It makes it more exciting, he thinks, and you agree. The thought of being the only ones to know what happened underneath the sheets drives you both crazy. It’s not because he’s possessive or anything - he leaves them more as a memory.
“Please what?”, his deep voice vibrates in his chest, and you feel yourself getting even wetter than before.
See? A total brat in bed. He knows what you want - he just wants you to say it out loud, otherwise he won’t give it to you. 
“Please, fuck me.”, you whimper, entangling your fingers in his dyed hair. “I want your cock so bad. Wanted it so bad the whole night.”
It sends a shiver down his spine, knowing that when you were watching a movie with your friends, all you could think of was him and how much you wanted him, needed him. All while having the butt plug deep inside inside of you, stretching out your hole.
“My God.” Felix moans against your skin, tip of his nose only a couple of inches away from his fingers, that are still playing with your clit, albeit a little slower now. “The things you make me wanna do to you…”, he bites his lip, looking at you through his hooded eyes, dark with lust. 
“Mhh, what kind of things?”, you ask him seductively, moving your hand from his hair to his face, brushing his plump lips with the pad of your thumb. He wastes no time in parting his lips and swirling his hot tongue around your digit. 
“The nastiest things.”, he grunts. Then, you feel two of his fingers parting your folds, and you gasp at the sudden feeling of your pussy being filled too. You feel incredibly full - his fingers deep inside your cunt and the plug in your other hole, and it feels amazing. So amazing, you wish Felix had suggested it sooner. 
When he lowers his head and swirls his tongue around your clit, you feel you’re about to pass out. An obscene sound leaves your mouth, and you can’t see it, but Felix smirks against your pussy as he sucks on your clit as if it were the tastiest meal. To him, it is. 
“Feelin’ good?”, he asks cockily, already knowing the answer. 
“So good.”, you pant, lips parted and eyes closed as he touches you everywhere - clit, g-spot and ass at the same time. 
“Wanna feel even better?”
You widen your eyes at his words. You don’t know whether you could possibly feel better than you’re right now, but at the same time you’re intrigued by his proposition. After all, if there’s one thing your relationship with Felix has taught you - is that he’s full of surprises. 
“Yes.”
Consent - that’s all Felix needs. You know he won’t ever do anything you haven’t previously agreed to. 
“Lay on your stomach, then.”
He pulls his fingers out of you, and you immediately position yourself on the bed the way he asked you. He bites his lips at the sight of your ass, and slaps it lightly, squeezing the soft flesh. Then, his fingers immediately find their way between your ass cheeks, gently spreading them a bit - revealing the beautiful decoration between them. Felix hisses at the sight.
“Gonna fuck your pussy while this -“, he taps on the plug and you moan. “-is deep inside your ass. Is that okay, love?” 
You don’t answer verbally this time, simply nod. He slaps your asscheek, hard. “Words.”
“Yes- yes, please.”, you whimper, biting on your lip, turning your head to the side to look at him over your shoulder as he positions himself behind you, on his knees. 
Then, he grabs you by the hips, lifting your hips up just enough to give him a better access to your pussy. You clench around nothing when you feel the tip of his cock kiss your entrance, ready to enter you - you’re so wet it’ll slip in easily. 
It does - parting your wet walls and sinking all the way inside of you until he fills you completely. \
“You’re so tight.” Felix grunts, caressing your lower back with his fingers. “Always take me so well, tho.”, he praises you. “I slipped right in, you sucked me in so good.”
You clench around him and he smirks cockily. He knows the effect he has on you. Without uttering another word, he starts moving inside of you, hips smacking against yours with each thrust as deep, hoarse grunts fall from his lips repeatedly. You can’t help but notice, tho, that he seems to be curiously intrigued by the metal object that’s currently buried inside your ass, practically staring at it as he fucks you from behind. 
“Wanna fuck this ass so bad.”, his words fall from his lips almost instinctively, when really - he didn’t even mean to say them out loud. 
Hearing him say that turns you on more than it probably should. 
“You can.”
Felix’s thrust inside your cunt come to an abrupt halt. “What?”, he asks in disbelief. He must’ve misheard you. 
“If you want to… you can.”, you repeat, slightly blushing, the thought of him fucking your other hole making you feel suddenly embarrassed. 
“Do you want to?”, he quirks an eyebrow at you. He doesn’t want you to agree to it only because you want to fulfill his fantasy, he can live without it. 
You nod against the soft pillow. “I do.”
“Right now?”
“Mh-hm.”
“Fuck.” Felix’s breath hitches in his throat. “Okay, love. Lie on your back, then - I wanna look you in the eyes.”
Ten minutes later, Felix is between your legs once again, rubber rolled onto his length, fully coated in lube.“I’m going to take this out now, love.” Felix whispers, fingers brushing against the cold material of the plug. 
You nod, biting your lip, and Felix begins to pull it out, making your eyes roll in the back of your skull at the sensation as a moan escapes your throat. It’s enough to make his cock throb, and it’s not even remotely close to being inside of you. You miss the sensation of being filled the second he pulls the plug out of you, already used to the feeling. 
Felix positions himself between your legs, spread for him, and aligns his tip to your hole, ready to push inside. “Ready, love?”, he asks, looking you in the eyes, not wanting to miss a single reaction of yours. 
“Yes.”
You suck in a breath the second Felix actually pushes the tip of his hard cock inside of you, he lets out a deep moan at the same time. The feeling is definitely different than when you had the plug inside of you - he is much thicker and longer. However, it’s not painful, just a little uncomfortable, but it’s just because you still have to get used to it. Felix immediately snaps his head in your direction, checking in on you to see if you’re okay. You nod, reassuring him that you’re fine, and he slowly pushes inside some more, albeit not all the way yet. 
Once he’s fully set inside of you, Felix wishes he could stay like this forever and never have to pull out. You feel unreal around him. 
“You’re so tight, love.”, he moans, his cock being deliciously squeezed by your walls. “It’s even tighter than your pussy, fuck.”, he grunts, his eyes locked on where your bodies meet. 
Felix decides now’s the perfect time to use his fingers - knowing he’s not going to last long anyway, not with the way you’re clenching around him, so hard he can barely move inside of you. The pads of his index and middle finger brush your clit lightly, and he can feel you relax around him immediately, allowing him to start thrusting slowly in and out of you, stretching your tight hole with his thick length. He moves his fingers all over the surface of your clit, drawing imaginary shapes - which results in you turning into a panting mess under him in a matter of seconds, but that’s perfectly okay, because he wants you to enjoy this as much as he is.
However, as previously stated, Lee Felix is a freak in the sheets, and despite the fact that he’s touching and stimulating your clit and his dick is literally inside your ass - he decides to give you more. 
“Tell me if it’s too much.”, he whimpers.
You’re about to as him what’s too much, but then you feel his two fingers moving down to circle the wet entrance of your pussy. Your eyes widen, but you can’t deny you’re curious about what he has in mind and how it’ll feel. Sure, you’ve had his fingers up your cunt before - plenty of times actually, but you never had them inside of you while his cock was buried in your other hole. This is new - good new.
He’s not prepared for the moan that leaves your mouth once his fingers slip inside of you, and he nearly cums on the spot. 
“You like that, mh?”, he asks you, a mischievous grin on his face as he looks you in the eyes. 
Your hair is all messy and ruffled, you’re propped up on your elbows and your legs are spread wide for him - only for him. Your cheeks are slightly pink and you look absolutely fucked out. It makes him groan and snap his hips to meet yours. For a second he’s scared he might’ve been too rough, but the moan you let out is a clear sign you enjoyed it, so he does that again. And again. 
“Oh, you sure do.”, he chuckles, his fingers still moving inside of you, pads on your g-spot. “My filthy girl likes having both of her holes filled, huh?”
You clench on both his fingers and his cock, your fingers gripping the bedsheets as you try to suppress a moan. “Felix, I’m-“, the words die in your throat, but Felix knows you like the back of his hand and nods. He knows you’re close, he can feel it. 
“It’s okay, let go, love.”, he encourages you, fingers moving swiftly inside of you as he slows down the movements of his hips, wanting to focus on your pleasure first. “Cum for me, love. You’ve been so good to me, you always are.”, his deep voice vibrates in his chest and sends a shiver down your spine as you release around his fingers, both of your holes clenching around him as his name falls from your lips.
Felix hates it that he can’t kiss your lips right now, but he’ll make up for it later. 
“That’s it, love. You were so good, came so hard.”, he praises, pulling his fingers out of you slowly, careful not to overstimulate you. And, of course, he brings them to his mouth to lick them clean - he does it every time. 
You place one of your hands on top of his hand that’s resting on your hip and intertwine your fingers with his. “Cum for me, baby.”, you whisper, looking him in the eyes, and his breath gets caught in his throat. “Show me how much you like fucking my ass.”
It’s not a secret that Felix likes dirty talking, and he’s a pro at it - but when you do it? On a whole other level. 
“Fuck.”, he grunts, as he picks up the pace of his thrusts, albeit delicately, his other hand grabbing your other hip. “Like it so much.”, the words fall from his mouth instinctively, his mind is completely blank, a sign he’s close. “‘M so fucking close.”, his cock throbs inside of you. 
“Cum, baby.”, you encourage him the same way he did you before, purposely clenching around his shaft. 
He releases inside the rubber with a deep grunt, halting his movements, balls deep inside of you as he kicks his head back, his Adam’s apple bobbing as he swallows. He thinks it might be the most intense orgasm he ever experienced in his whole life - truth be told, he thinks it every time, because every orgasm with you is the best orgasm. It takes him a couple of seconds to regain his breath, and then he starts to pull out, fingers wrapped around the base of his softening cock to make sure the rubber stays in place. 
Aftercare with Felix is always sweet and heartfelt, with soft words whispered and lingering kisses and touches as he takes care of you, and today is no exception. Loving and gentle as he runs you a bath, delicate as he blow-dries your hair, detangling it by running his fingers through it, and absolutely cute when he asks you to do your skincare together. 
Your night ends with you and Felix sat on your bed with tissue masks on - him wearing a pink hairband with bunny ears and no, it’s not yours, contrary to what one may think. It matches his pajamas, that’s why he bought it. 
And as he shows you reels and pictures of cute animals or wholesome memes - you can’t help but wonder how is it possible for him to be a fucking sex god and then turn into the sweetest, most precious and innocent-looking human being in the whole world. 
❤︎
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m1ssunderstanding · 4 months
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Get Back Rewatch 55 Years On: Day 15
The beautiful mess that would’ve been The Beatles plus Yoko Ono plus Billy Preston plus Bob Dylan plus whoever else. Although I guess that is sort of what George went on to do. He really did just want a group of friends that cared more about each other than the product, and that’s what he created for himself. 
John: And the dream I had was you. The camera: zooms in on Paul’s wounded puppy eyes. John: *staring at Paul* d’you get my meaning? Imagine doing that to literally any other human being. I would not be that intimate with my best friend, my husband, my sister . . . anyone. Let alone my ex, (not literally, you all get what I mean) in front of my current SO and multiple cameras. This kind of thing really makes me wonder what kind of insane shit he must’ve said/done when they were alone, especially in happier times. 
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George painted his own psychedelic guitar, and it looks gorg. Who painted Paul’s. Anyone know?
How can I Not assume “Stand By Me” is *meaningful* if, firstly, this is the second time you’ve sung it at each other during this project, and secondly, if you look at each other like This while singing it? Then again, when are they not uncomfortably intense when singing together?
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“Oh, help me, Daddy. I don’t even know how this thing works.”  He says about the instrument he plays in the most successful band of all time. Paul can play whatever he needs to to get what he wants out of someone, and that includes dumb.
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John’s little “Ookaay.” At Paul’s weird carrying-on about his insecurities with his bass playing. It just screams, “You’re delusional and I’m not getting into this right now.” Which is 1000% valid. Imagine being Paul McCartney and second-guessing your bass skills. Reminds me of that quote where John’s like, “He’s an egomaniac about everything else, but he’s coy about his bass playing. Which is stupid because he’s one of the most innovative bass players . . .”
John and Paul nail the harmony on “HoooooohOoOoOme.” And the LOOKs, you guys.
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But also the nonverbal vocal communication! It’s one of my favorite parts about them, really. One of the things that reminds me of how special their relationship is. John makes a face. Paul goes, “brroop”. John replies with a beaming, “Yeah!” To which Paul adds another “brrrrip” as they simultaneously continue the song. It’s just unreal. Nobody does that. They are magical and they were right to think they had special telecommunicative powers. 
The lunch orders today are everything you need to know about the Beatles. John: Sparrow on toast. Paul: Boiled testicle. George: Uh, Mal? So, we’ll have whatever the vegetables are, and if they’ve got any cheese sauce for the cauliflower. Ringo: Mashed potato. That’s it. That’s them.
“Then there’s another one,” says Paul, doing a shit job of pretending he hasn’t rehearsed this to sound like some accidental discovery. “Don’t let me down. Oh, darling,” sung suddenly, and forcefully, directly at John, “I’ll never let you down.”
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John, beaming like the star quarterback just told him he looked pretty, tucks his hair behind his ears and says, barely hovering in the safety of a joking tone, “Yeah, it’s like you and me are lovers.”
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John has of course taken Paul’s game of gay chicken an arm’s reach farther than Paul’s comfortable with, at least in front of cameras, so he can only nod, and brush his own hair back. Stiff, expressionless. "Yeah."
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(Of course, Peter Jackson cuts out what eventually evolves into John and Paul singing “we’re a couple of queers” and talking about wearing skirts for the performance) 
Am I the only one getting the vibe that John genuinely dislikes Teddy Boy? Not because he thinks it sucks or anything but because he doesn’t like the obvious similarities to his relationship with Julia? Personally, I love it. It was my anxiety song a few years back.
The original lyric to “fancy me chances” was Not “frock” I absolutely guarantee. 
Love Paul checking on Billy. Love that they're all, even with everything they've got going, making sure he's set up and taken care of.
Sorry not sorry that I’m so thirsty over literally every woman in this show, but. Hello, Pattie! She just walks in, ignores everyone else, kisses him Like That, whispers something, and gets out to go live her own life. Queen. Gorgeous. Obsessed.
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George Martin praising his children for "working so well together." I love that he refused to produce them after the white album, not because they were being disrespectful to him or anything, but because they weren't getting along. And that, although he's not producing, technically, he can't stop himself coming in to make sure they're okay. He's such a good dad, literally.
John over here being emo af by himself, playing “I Feel Fine,” because he definitely does Not feel fine and he’s just as nostalgic as Paul, which is way too fucking nostalgic. Poor baby. 
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What are your honest thoughts on all Descendants boys? From both books and movies?
Oehh that’s a good question! I’ll base most of this off of the movies because I remember them more clearly. Sorry this is so late, I needed some time to sort out my thoughts. Let’s see:
Ben: cutie, golden retriever energy, needs to grow a bit more of a spine but as a recovering doormat I vibe with him.
He’s got a good heart, and he’s definitely going places, but I have no idea who decided a 16-year-old should be king. Hilariously, he’s a better king than his dad because he cares about all of his people, not just the “heroes”. But still, he’s 16, let him have his dumbass teenage years. He’s still in his phase of wanting to please everyone and that isn’t gonna lead to the best decision making. You’re king, Ben, you can overrule your girlfriend’s selfish idiotic plan of closing the barrier. Just tell her “the barrier was opened for you to come through too. If those kids aren’t worth the risk, does that mean you aren’t either? Should we throw you back?!” And she’s change her tune real fast. You gotta give some tough love sometimes.
Jay: cool, I wanna know his gym routine, pretty funny but rash, needs Carlos to temper his brand of crazy (love their bromance).
I love the narrative parallels to the movie Aladdin. Jafar thought himself so far above a street rat and now he’s raised his son to be one so he can continue being a con-man. In the movies, Jay is actually a very accurate representation of your upbringing shaping you into who you are. All Jay knows is stealing, he’s never been taught to pay if he doesn’t have to, so to him stealing’s perfectly fine. It’s normal. It’s a lot more subtle than the whole “who doesn’t like being evil” bit, but the core idea is the same: when all you’ve ever known is one perspective, that’s gonna feel like the objective truth because you’ve never had a chance to try a different one.
Carlos De Vil: Best (movie) Boy, my baby, I love him. What a little nerd (affectionate).
He’s a big part of why I willfully ignore the absolute stupidity that is the third movie’s ending. I’m sorry Mal, wtf is wrong with you??? You set your supposed friend’s abuser free for nothing but some empty platitudes and dare suggest you’ve become an empathetic person?!?! In the books, we get a lot more insight into just how horrible of a mother Cruella is, but even in the movies we see he’s had it bad because of how jumpy and nervous he is. Disney is still Disney so we don’t get much of the healing process, but we see how he calms down and adjusts to a normal life over the course of the movies when he’s out of the bad situation, which is pretty good by Disney standards. Cameron Boyce did an amazing job playing him (R.I.P Cameron) and seeing an abuse victim get comfortable within their own skin and getting the happy ending they deserve is always fun.
Harry Hook: Insane (affectionate), most fashionable drama queen ever, absolutely crazy, more than a few screws loose but in the best way possible, he’s hilarious.
So on the surface, Harry’s pretty simple. A dude who’s lost his marbles and flirts with everyone. He probably has some kind of moral compass, since he didn’t rip Mal’s throat out with his hook when she revealed her little stunt in D3, but it fell overboard at some point and couldn’t be found so nobody knows what it is except Harry himself. Also, he has his sane moments, like during that same confrontation in D3 I mentioned before where he says “And you, King Benny... you're probably gonna throw us all back inside.” It’s the first time I’ve heard him sound… not like Harry. It’s sombre and defeated, a little disappointed maybe? Either way it’s really good acting and it implies he can act completely “normal” but he just chooses not to, which makes me like him even more. He’s just a dude living his best life despite the circumstances he was born into.
Gil: adorable, hilarious, kinda clueless but in a good way.
I love characters that have no idea what’s going on half the time but are absolute sweethearts trying their best. He’s like- the opposite of his dad in every way and I’m living for it!
Gaston Jr and Gaston the third: I don’t have much to say on them, let alone separately, so they get a section together.
Honestly? I don’t remember having an opinion of them. They made Evie happy by wresting, which is cool so they get points for that. Seem like they’re trying to out-gentleman each other to win Evie’s heart and since they’re not being creepy assholes about it they are objectively better than their dad. Very much brawl over brains, the two of them, with their constant wrestling reminding me of Carlos and Jay except they’re both the muscle. Kinda cute sibling relationship, even if it’s in a VK-typical villain-flavored way.
Anthony Tremaine: squeeeee, my type is pretty boys who sigh in annoyance at everything, I guess? We only get scraps but I happily cradle them to my chest.
Uhmmm so Anthony’s personality is mostly up for imagination? The only canon information we have is that he’s most likely Anastasia’s only kid (someone on Tumblr pointed out that, in the scene with the wicked step-daughters, he’s referred to only as their cousin, not their brother) and he’s very bored with his cousins’ antics. Given A Twist In Time the potential drama is endless. Every time Anthony’s mentioned we’re reminded he’s pretty and has good style, and I love that for him. Dude lives on an isle of junk and still looks like a supermodel. Lots of room for my own ideas while still remaining within the realm of “could be canon” with just enough base in there that I’m not just creating an OC, and as a writer and artist that’s all I need tbh.
Hadie: cute, deserves better, I need more of him and Mal bonding
Mal’s half-brother, son of Hades, very cool. I like that he’s trying to turn good and having a hard time, because that’s very realistic for someone who grew up not knowing anything other than evil. Descendants 2 tried to tackle it with Mal, but failed miserably. We know Hades sucks as a parent in descendants (neglect is abuse) so that’s not gonna help him.
Dough: Awww he’s so cute with Evie 🥺
No really that’s it. He’s a nerd that gets the girl, has some very funny moments, but honestly most of his character is centered around Evie? And they’re cute together it’s not a bad thing but there isn’t much to analyze. He’s understandably pissed about someone like Chad getting all the girls while using them, but that’s also only ever seen in relation to Evie.
Chad Charming: what a bitch (derogatory), total coward, I hate him but he’s funny.
So I have no issue with characters who conduct themselves terribly (I love Audrey, (fanon) Anthony, Uma, and many others from many fandoms) if, and that’s a massive IF, they have a good reason for it. And I’ll count “because I can and I want to” as a good reason, because by that point you have someone who’s mean and owns it. I can appreciate the self-awareness and usually those characters are very extra so it’s entertaining. If not that, there needs to be a reason they are the way they are. Audrey has the pressure from her grandmother (and the borderline verbal abuse), Uma has the very real grievance of living in squalor on a run-down island full of the worst of humanity because she was born, what does Chad have? He’s spoiled. A spoiled brat. And he goes from that to an overtly whimpering coward with none of the pretense of superiority in any field. His one saving grace is that he’s a massive joke.
Diego De Vil, Clay Clayton, Gonzo, Jace and Harry Badun, Herkie, Aziz, Jonas, Lefou Deux, Li Shang Jr, everyone else I missed: no opinion, because they’re not relevant enough for the writers to give them a personality.
I have nothing I’m sorry. I barely remember reading their names and I don’t remember anything from the scenes they’re (mentioned) in to get an idea of what to talk about here.
That was… a lot lmao
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Bering and Wells Reunion Panel Transcription (4/17/2021)
This is from the ClexaCon Virtual panel with Joanne Kelly and Jaime Murray, with Dana Piccoli as moderator and Mark as ASL interpreter. I spent around six hours on this and there were really only a couple of brief bits I couldn’t make out - I tried to make this as thorough as possible even though the audio quality was iffy at points and there was a lot of overlapping talking. I also included all of the ums and uhs in the interest of thoroughness so sorry if that gets annoying. Let me know if I’ve gotten any screen names wrong.
Content notes: brief discussion of on-set injury, allusions to homophobia from higher-ups, discussions of hostile workplace experiences due to gender, brief discussion of the ovarian cancer subplot, Jo misgenders Mark once and then corrects herself.
Dana: And I think we are live! Hey everyone, welcome, welcome, this is day 2 of ClexaCon Virtual. So glad to be here with you for our Warehouse 13 Bering and Wells panel. What a great video! I believe that was Mal that made that. Fantastic work! [They showed a fanvid prior to the panel on the stream.] Uh, I want to take a second to introduce Mark, our ASL interpreter. Thank you so much for being here, Mark. Well, I know that the Bering and Wells fandom is still going strong and, um, I’m so excited to be able to present this panel to you today, so without further ado, let’s get started. It’s been seven years since we last embarked on the wonderfully quirky world of Warehouse 13 and we’re thrilled to have not one, but two of the show’s stars here with us, Bering and Wells in the flesh, please welcome Joanne and Jaime!
Jo: [laughs] Hi!
Jaime: Hi guys!
Dana: Hi!
Jaime: Oh my goodness, I was tearing up watching that, that was just...
Dana: It’s so good, right?
Jaime: And Mal made it, of course, I mean just, the fandom is so amazing, that we have a fan who made that amazing movie, and I’m sitting here... were you tearing up, Jo?
Jo: Yeah... [laughs]
Dana: She’s like, I can’t talk right now!
Jaime: Aww.
Jo: Yeah, it’s, you know, it’s like, it’s like a, a wormhole, it’s like going in a wormhole, really, to see that put together in that way, and just, that somebody did that is, um, crazy, wonderful.
Jaime: Yeah.
Dana: When, when we are in person in, uh, in, in Las Vegas, I’m often backstage with the actors as they see these videos maybe f- for the first time, and your reaction is the reaction that everyone has. They all get teary, they all just like hold onto each other, it’s, it’s really sweet and wonderful.
Jaime: Oh my gosh, I, I wish I could go back in time and like, we film more of it and, and enjoy it more, because sometimes when you’re in it, you’re just going so fast and, you know, you don't even realize the meaning of, of, of what you’ve created until you see it through the eyes of the fans and what it meant to them, and then I, I wish I could lean into it more. [laughs]
Dana: Well, we’re certainly gonna get into that. [laughs]
Jaime: [laughs]
Dana: Alright, well, let’s kick things off! Uh, as of a we- a week ago, I was prepping to interview Jaime, and then suddenly the heavens opened up, and what was one became two. [they laugh] Joanne joined the party! How did this crazy kismet even happen?
Jo: I’m trying this new thing where I say yes. [laughs]
Jaime: [laughs] Well done!
Jo: Thanks. [laughs] Um, it’s a new thing I’m trying. Um, Jaime texted me and she’s like, I'm doing this thing, we had talked about it, I think the last panel we did at Dragon*Con maybe?
Jaime: Yeah.
Dana: 2018.
Jo: And she had told me about ClexaCon and I was like, that, because I really enjoyed that panel that we did, it felt, you know, I think one of the reasons, and I think that the work between us is, and I look at it now and I’m so touched because I, and I also just think the world of Jaime as an actor, I think she’s brilliant and her choices are so clean and-
Jaime: Ditto.
Jo: -full heart forward, like I, I’ve always been a fan of what she bought, and just personally on set I was in a, it was a very male environment, and Jaime came and I was like, oh my god, like, someone to talk to, someone who cared, and she took care of me, like she really - so I just, I don’t know, when she reached out I was like, of course, yes, yes.
Dana: Like it’s in two days, sure! Let’s, let’s go!
Jaime: We missed each other as well. It was also an opportunity to hang out, like, we missed each other!
Jo: Yeah.
Jaime: We had this flurry of texts of like, checking in with each other, and what-
Jo: What have you been watching? what are you doing?
Jaime: Yeah.
Jo: Where are you?
Jaime: Yeah, so.
Dana: Oh, that’s amazing! So you’ve maintained this really wonderful friendship since, since the end of the show.
Jo: Yeah, I mean, actors are nomads and we’re very sort of, I feel, Jaime, I don’t know if you feel the same way, but it’s like those friends that you have that you don’t see forever, but when you see them you fall back into a rhythm automatically, there’s never, it doesn’t feel push or pulled, it’s just, it’s just nice.
Jaime: I, I think also for us, um, I think there’s a sisterhood as well, you know, I think that, you know, Jo just touched on it. You know, often in a cast there’s, um, it’s changing and it’s evolving all the time, and this was seven years ago, and it was seven years before that, it started, so like fourteen years ago-
Jo: Oh my god. [laughs]
Jaime: But there’s, ninety nine point five percent of the people behind the camera are men, the majority of the parts are often men, or it’s, it’s male and women, but the men have the more heroic bits and the funnier lines and you’re kind of struggling with that and you’re glad to be working so you’re kind of making good and making it okay, but you’re kind of like, you know, getting feels, and, you know, as, as Joanne said, it, you know, you’re laughing at dick jokes when you don’t find them particularly funny- [all laugh]
Jo: Like wow! Oh! [sarcastic thumbs up]
Jaime: And so when I came in, I saw Jo - I had been on shows, like I was on a show called Hustle, I was the only girl in the cast, and then everybody, uh, behind the camera was, um, all men. Um, on Warehouse we had one female writer on some episodes, um, we never had a fe- uh, um, a female director on anything or a producer-
Jo: No we had, we had Tawn- [presumably about to mention Tawnia McKiernan] we had two fem- we had a few, but we were-
Jaime: No- no- not on my, not on my episodes.
Jo: Oh, on yours.
Jaime: But it was just like, I came in and I saw Jo and I understood, and I knew what her experience was, and so there was this kind of kinhood, this sisterhood, and I think it, it’s not a male-female thing, but it’s, it’s a minority and majority thing. When you’re in a minority and the majority is doing something, you either have to get down with the program and go with that flow, or you get kind of fe- you feel like you’re difficult or annoying to everybody. And I kind of came in and I just was like, oh like, I get it, it’s hard, and I’m gonna give this woman, like, my, my energy and my love and, so it was-
Dana: So you were like I- you looked at Joanne and you were like, that is someone I can smash the patriarchy with!
Jaime: [laughs] Yes.
Dana: Let’s do it!
Jo: No, I read a lot of books [laughs] when we weren’t filming. I would like get on my chair and just be like this. [mimes holding book in front of face]
Jaime: Yes!
Jo: [laughs] Like I’m doing this now, I’ll see you guys when we’re rolling again, you know, it was really- and, but also, you know, it’s so, and it is changing, it’s changing and evolving in a really, um, at a wonderful rate, but also I would get so excited to be in a scene with another woman that wasn’t about a man, you know, or that we weren’t- uh, it was just so nice to have girl-girl scenes. That never happens, it hardly ever happens. Like, the majority of scenes that you do are about love or acrimony with men, um, and it’s so nice to have a relationship with a woman that’s, um, sort of reflective of how relationships with women actually are. Um, I’ve been, I shifted into writing because of frustration with just not reading stories that I felt were reflective of our, my experience as a woman, you know, that sort of, um, and I think that Bering and Wells sort of in, I mean, that’s when that ship turned for me, as well.
Dana: Well ho- hold that thought, we are, we are going there!
Jaime: And, and also because it wasn’t, it actually wasn’t written. Um, there was, in a way we were able to steer that ship, and then we’d already kind of given a road map for the way this energy was, so it wasn’t written in the conventional way. Like, even like, when a, when a, when a, when a woman will have a love interest it’s, it’s often written by men and it’s o- often in a conventional kind of way, whereas our relationship, at a time before people were even kind of, uh, exploring this that much, um, now, now much more, thank god, it’s more, more inclusive. But it was more kind of, um, uh, complicated than, than maybe would’ve been written about, so it was given more nuance, yeah.
Jo: You mean like, do you mean like actual relationships? [laughs]
Jaime: You what? Say that again?
Jo: Like actual relationships! [laughs]
Jaime: Yeah, yeah, yeah. [laughs]
Jo: You know, that don’t come in and you have a “where they start and where they finish,” like that we, oh, we know where they’re gonna end up so we’ll just gonna-
Dana: Right, right.
Jo: -move them around like chess pieces. It was actually an energy that Jaime and I created, and the story sort of evolved from that energy as - it was inside out as opposed to outside in, which I think made it a real relationship.
Dana: Well, so my friend Dorthy Snarker, she once said that HG and Myka’s storyline has been main text pretending to be subtext, which feels really apt to me.
Jaime: Yeah!
Dana: So at what point-
Jo: Very smart.
Dana: What point in the show did it really click with the two of you that this connection that HG and Myka shared was something much deeper?
Jo: Jaime just had, Jaime, you just explained this very coolly in, in, um-
Jaime: One of our chats.
Jo: Yeah, yeah. Why don’t you speak to this, why don’t you take this?
Jaime: Well, well, first of all like I said, there was like kind of this sisterhood when I came in and, um, Jo, uh, Jo wasn’t like, like it wasn’t like I came in and she was like hey let’s be friends. I came in and she was behind a book, and she wasn’t particularly accessible, and she wasn’t, like, she was a bit grumpy, you know. And so I was like, my personality type is like, how do I crack this nut? [laughs] How do I make this woman love me? [laughs] This is the most unaccessible woman-
Dana: That explai- Jaime that explains a lot! [laughs]
Jaime: This is the most unaccessible women on the set, the mo- the most unaccessible human to me. How do I make her fall in love with me? So it’s like partly my narcissism-
Jo: [laughs] Jaime Murray in a nutshell, everyone!
Jaime: -and my ego, um, so I was kind of winning her over off set, and then, you know, as she was opening up to me and, you know, she was kind of telling me about some of the challenges she was coming up against, I was like, yeah, that’s, that’s not fair, and yeah, I completely get that, you know. So we were kind of like having that kind of journey, I’m like, like, I’m like, oh no, you’re not crazy, everyone else is crazy! Like, let’s smash the patriarchy!
Jo: [laughs]
Jaime: And then, and then unfortunately, um, Jo hurt herself really badly doing a stunt, and, um, you know, there’s no time to hurt yourself on a film set, and there’s no time to take time and, and kind of heal your back or anything like that. So she was taking some pretty strong painkillers and she was working through it, and I had spinal surgery, I, I know what back pain is like, it’s, it’s the worst. I mean, it’s literally everything, you know, you feel like an old person. And so I was, um, taking care of her as best as I could, and we had the scene, and it was the scene in the street where, I, I think it's the first scene that, where I get the grappler out-
Dana: Oh, the grappler.
Jaime: And I shoot it into the air and I put my arm around her and we shoot up-
Dana: We’re very familiar with this scene. [laughs]
Jo: [doing grappler motion] [laughs]
Jaime: Yeah, so, so it’s like, it had like, physicality, and also it was a really, um, we always laugh that Toronto has about five seasons in one day, so you’ll like start shooting the scene and then suddenly there’s a, like a snowstorm! Bright sunshine!
Jo: Then it’s sunny! Then rain!
Jaime: Torrential rain, wind - and it was one of those, and we had to move to a new location, we were really behind in the day, and she had this one pice of hair that kept on like blowing in her face-
Dana: Oh, I know where this is going, Jaime. [laughs]
Jaime: And she was, the thing was, she was like, also these painkillers-
Jo: I was like, I can’t even see with the hair, I was like, I was hopped up on so many painkillers...
Jaime: Yeah, she was hopped up, she was like, I can’t even get my hair out of the way!
Jo: I think I actually called that day, it was the only time where I was like, guys I can’t work anymore, like, I literally, the doctor was like, you need to rest and I’m like I can’t. And the first AD came over to me and he was like, you’re gonna have to say stop, because nobody is gonna stop the filming, and I didn't wanna do that because you don't want to be the person that, that loses the day.
Jaime: That’s part of it, isn’t it? You’re, you can’t be, you can’t have any vulnerability or be a woman in any way, any shape or form on a film set. [laughs]
Jo: Yeah.
Jaime: So I knew in the morning, and so I’d been like trying to take care of her and had, had like this experience of having spinal surgery, so I was like caretaking as much, as best as I could. I’m a Cancerian as well, so it’s in my nature.
Dana: Sure.
Jaime: And, um, and we‘re in this scene and we’d had to kind of cut so many times, and this hair just kind of-
Jo: [laughs]
Jaime: -came over her face like this, and I just lent forward and on my line I just moved the hair out of her, um, face and put it back, and there was this, this look of genuine-
Jo: [laughs]
Jaime: -surprise and shock in her face because we hadn’t rehearsed it and, and, and you know, we rehearse everything, and then, and then Joanne, what did you say that you-
Jo: I said I had this feeling, you know, when she did that I was like, oooh, um, what’s happening? [laughs]
Dana: [laughs]
Jaime: What are these feelings I’m having?
Jo: I did not expect all these feelings.
Jaime: Someone is being nice to me in this hostile world!
Jo: I was like this is so, it was like, pink light came up and there was glitter all of a sudden, and a unicorn in the back and, um-
Dana: Yep.
Jaime: They were really good drugs, you can’t, they’re illegal now, you can’t get them now cause they’re illegal now, but-
Jo: [laughs] No, no! But that point I’d say that the storyline really developed from inside out, you know outside, it was actually something, she did something that made me respond in a certain way, and as an actor you have those openings and you can choose to go, you either close them, like if, if I don’t like an actor [laughs] and someone does something, I might go like, no, I don’t wanna gonna go with that- [laughs]
Jaime: Yeah.
Jo: -and change the track, but because I love Jaime and, and that happened, I sort of just was like I’m gonna go with this energy and see where it leads. And so it was a very organic, and it took me completely, and I had not expected it, it took me completely- but I liked it, so I started, then that...
Dana: So you are the reason, you two are the captains of the Bering and Wells ship. You made that happen!
Jaime: Yeah.
Jo: Yeah.
Jaime: But also I felt like HG, you know, she came from an era when the suffragette movement was, um, happening, and she was active in that, however, she had to write under her brother’s name, um-
Dana: Yeah.
Jaime: And as a woman, you know, she couldn’t be even open about her brilliance and she had to let her dimwitted brother take credit for it, and then she was frozen. So she was an activist before her time and suddenly she’s waking up in a world where there’s this dynamic woman, gun-toating woman kind of using her wits and brainpower and like, god bless Pete [laughs] but he was a little bit, like, she was the brains and the brilliance, and often he would be kind of like, you know, taking the credit for it or like having the girls flirt with him, and I just felt like if I grow up, if I woke up from, you know, a dream of, of being a suffragette and I woke up and I saw Myka, surely I would be more fascinated-
Jo: [laughs]
Jaime: -by this woman who is everything that I had ever wished to be, so I started playing off this fascina- I was fascinated by her. Pete was just as stupid as my brother. [laughs]
Jo: And I do have to say, I do have to give the showrunner Jack Kenny credit here too, because Jack really let us run with it and started to lean into it, and the writers were all very accepting, so it was, and, and Jack particularly, you know, we had a lot, we had our creative differences, but he was really generous in this storyline with us, like I think, he gave us a lot of rope to play with-
Jaime: Yeah.
Jo: And it was interesting rope, because they never-
Dana: It was attached to a grappling hook is what it was!
Jo: Yeah, and they never, like what i really loved about it is the never like put it on the nose it was always very elliptical, we always had room to breathe, um-
Jaime: Well partly I don’t, I think that it was, it was, it’s funny to talk about it now because it doesn't seem that long a- long ago, but it-
Jo: But it was so long ago...
Jaime: -it was unusual-
Jo: For that.
Jaime: -for the genre and for the audience that we were going for to, to actually go there, um,
Dana: Yeah. Seven years ago, you’re absolutely right. Things have changed tremendously, and especially in the last five years.
Jo: Yeah, yeah.
Jaime: And, but I think that Jack and Drew, they were kind of excited about what we were doing, but actually, you know, we weren't sure what the network would say or what the advertisers might think, and so, um, you know, I’m really proud of the work that we were able to, to say-
Jo: Yeah.
Jaime: You know, being the first in some ways.
Jo: It’s interesting, you know, like Jaime texted me, she sent me this video and I was looking at it and I was just so proud-
Jaime: I sent you Mal’s video, I sent you one of Mal’s other videos.
Jo: She’s wonderful, so like shoutout to her!
Jaime: Yeah
Jo: That’s, yeah, it was gorgeous, and I was really proud of the work, you know, after, it’s, you create these things in a bubble and, I haven’t se- I haven’t seen Warehouse, I never watched it. [laughs] so I’m always very surprised to see these videos, it feels like I’m cracking open-
Jaime: And I want to say as well, you know, when we say we haven’t down and watched all the shows, or you know, in some peoples’ cases, many of the shows, you know, it’s, it’s not because we don’t love the show and we don't love the work that everyone else has done, done, it’s actually a lot of actors don't watch, um, their own work. It’s, if, if you’ve ever heard your own voice on an answer phone or something and you're like, who’s that? Oh my god, that’s me!
Dana: [laughs]
Jaime: Like, so when you see yourself on TV or screen it’s like that on crack, it’s absolutely terrifying, and, and you’re like oh my god, like behind a pillow, like-
Jo: Filled with self loathing and despair. [laughs]
Jaime: Yes.
Dana: That’s okay.
Jaime: Which is a work in progress, I’m trying to deal with that now.
Dana: Well, when, at what point did you realize that queer people were actually starting to flock to the show to support this direction with these characters?
Jaime: We, we didn't know, we didn’t know-
Dana: No?
Jaime: Well, we, um, I, um, Jo’s not on social media so I don’t know when she knew, other than maybe when I told her. I saw replies on twitter-
Jo: Comic Con.
Dana: Somebody didn’t like hire a plane and like, around the area with like, a Bering and Wells forever…?
Jo: I, I remember, I remember going to Comic Con, for me because that’s’ when I had the fan interaction, um, because I wasn’t on Twitter-
Jaime: Yeah, there were fans that told us.
Jo: And, and, uh, a lot of the women, I remember being asked some very specific questions during panels, and, you know, there's a lot of guys who like to talk at those panel so I didn’t get to talk a lot but I made it quite, I, I made it quite clear about how important that storyline was to me and it, it, I realized very quickly that it was important to a lot more women than me. I didn’t really realize, too, that storytelling wasn’t represented in that way, at that point, you know. I didn’t feel that. I didn’t feel like that was a groundbreaking choice, to choose to be attracted to a woman in a scene to me is life, it’s how I live my life, I, I’m you know, I don’t have those, I’m not in a box [laughs] and it so when I realized, it was a eye-opening moment. I’m like, I’m like, wait, wait, this is, this is something new that’s not being done?
Dana: You guys were kind of on, you were like right here [miming going up a hill or mountain] and then shortly after Warehouse, it started going like [woosh noise of going down the other side of the hill] and this wave of representation started happening.
Jaime: Well, ev- even in Warehouse, there was an openly gay character in, in Warehouse.
Dana: Right, yes!
Jo: Yeah, yeah, there was Aaron.
Jaime: But it’s been, it’s been incredibly, um, powerful for, for, for, for me, um, you know, I I, think that a lot of people, some people are like oh my god, you know, I wish I could go back to my childhood or my teenage years, I, you could not pay me anything for, I would not go back to my teenage years for love or money. It was, it was a incredibly painful time for me, um, and not a particularly happy time for me, and, um, you know, just awkwardness, you know, all the stuff that, you know, all the stuff people feel in their teens, all the bad stuff I felt in my teens, so when I’ve spoken to people at conventions, um, and they've’ spoken to me about, um, Warehouse having, and our relationship in Warehouse having a positive effect for them in their teen, in their painful teenage years, it’s, it, it, it can bring me to tears, because i- if I could have imagined having kind of that, some kind of impact when I’d been a teenager maybe I wouldn't have been so miserable, but, um, I’m really humbled by it. it’s really lovely.
Dana: Yeah, you, you most certainly have had a tremendous impact on a lot of peoples’ lives and I’m so glad that you are able to take that and keep it in your heart.
Jaime: Yeah.
Dana: Speaking of this kind of sea change of the last few years, do you think that if Warehouse had been airing now that things might have ended differently? Do you think that maybe that subtext really would have been pulled much more into main text?
Jaime: You’d know better, Jo.
Jo: I...don’t know the answer to that question, um, perhaps, actually, absolutely! It’s twenty twenty-
Jaime: If we were writing it, maybe.
Jo: I mean, that’s what I’m trying to do. [laughs] Um, yeah, I think so. Maybe we would have been able to lean more into that storyline, um-
Jaime: Maybe we would’ve had a, be a stronger voice in shaping the narrative there.
Jo: It, yeah, I mean, Jack was, Jack was great about it, but it, it was a different, it was a different era. I think now is, is really a beautiful time for storytelling in the sense that it is really becoming so much more inclusive and we have representation, which, I mean, seeing ourselves represented in stories is how we understand ourselves in the world, and that’s, it’s so important, you know, it’s so important where we’re going, um, and I wish there could have been more of that in Warehouse, but I’m glad there was what there was.
Dana: Yeah.
Jaime: I, I, I also think that, um, you know, it’s changed so much in just such a short space of time, but particularly in the last couple of years, like, women were always, um, portrayed like, like, women always had to be perfect and kind of cute, and, you know, there had to be kind of something attractive or charming about them at all times, you know, and so we always had to put a bow on a woman to make her acceptable. And one of the things that I’m really loving is, you know, that women can be flawed and they can still, you can still love them and, you know, one of the things that always stun- stunned me is that I’ve been so welcomed into a community of kind, inclusive, um, you know, powerful activist, um, women, uh, um, and I’m like, why do these amazing women even like my characters when I’ve played such, um, a bad character, and it’s like-
Dana: But, but we love that! Queer women love a villain!
Jaime: Well, it’s like, flawed characters, and it’s like, and then recently I watched this show called, um, I hate Suzie Pickles [actual title of show: I Hate Suzie], um, there’s a show called, um, uh, I May Destroy You. They’re British shows, actually, both are.
Dana: Oh, yeah, it’s so good.
Jaime: And they, these are complex, um, women who make bad choices, and they self sabotage and they do things that are kind of frowned upon in society, and yet I love them, these women, and it’s like, if I can love these women for all their flaws, then maybe I'm okay too. And I think that we, we have to allow women to be flawed and lovable instead of just being cute little heroines that kind of support men at all times. I mean, it’s changed so much, that’s kind of, like the old, the old order of what it used to be, like, but yeah, it’s exciting.
Dana: That happe- That was what was written in my yearbook! Just, Dana Piccoli, flawed but lovable.
Jaime: Ah! [laughs]
Dana: So I totally, I totally can appreciate that.
Jaime: Was it that? Was it- that would be the best!
Dana: [laughs] I love that.
Jaime: Flawed and lovable, not but.
Dana: Oh yeah, yes, flawed and lovable, sorry, sorry. That’s, that’s what, that’s where I went wrong in the yearbook.
Jaime: Exactly.
Dana: Uh, J- Jaime. A lot has been made of this, the apples scene.
Jaime: Yes.
Dana: Do you think I smell apples is basically saying “I love you”? Were you, what do you think that Helena was trying to express at that time?
Jaime: I, I, I think that it was, um, a sense of, uh, acceptance, and, um, and, and, and, and, and love, I mean, uh, because Helena had always been such a, kind of a troubled character in so many ways and she had kind of, um, these struggles and this darkness and these mental health issues and I think that “I smell apples” was a, a, a wa- wa- was, she, she’d kind of come to the light, you know, she, she had, had kind of accepted herself, and it was such an altruistic act of love, she was sacrificing herself in order to save the others, that it was true love, like she’d overcome the darkness. So it was, uh, I, I, I, I, love that, uh, moment, yeah, that kind of-
Jo: I know we wanted, uh, one of the most beautiful definitions of love onscreen is recognition of your soul in someone else.
Dana: Mhmm.
Jo: That’s really what happens, and I thought that when Jaime did that, there was a very beautiful, I mean it’s sort of like Romeo and Juliet. You see this moment of, and we talked about it earlier, that energy, that to me is that. what that is-
Jaime: Yes.
Jo: -the scene is, “I smell apples.” It’s these two people who see each other in each other and are profoundly connected, whether, in whatever way that it is, it’s just a profound connection, you know, and so often we find boxes to put these connections in, you know, as humans, we want to make sense, we want to make logic of them, you know, which is, I think, um, why storytelling suffers in the representation, because you want to define what a thing is and kind of, um, the most beautiful things about some of the most special relationships is they, they're beyond what you can say they are, they’re beyond categorization, they are, you know...
Jaime: I, I, I definitely think that, although it wasn’t written in that way, I mean, if you actually go back and look at the footage, I’m saying “I love you” to, uh, uh, HG is saying “I love you” to Myka and Myka is is let-
Jo: I only think that’s what she was saying.
Jaime: -letting, letting it land.
Dana: Confirmation, folks! Confirmation, um, everyone!
Jo: In here. [points to head]
Dana: Write it in your vows, write it now in your vows!
Jo: Dana, you’re funny! [laughs]
Dana: Thank you!
Jaime: But wh- when, when did I come back and I was like, married to, what-
Dana: You, you weren't married, you were with a gentleman, and he had a, a young child and-
Jaime: And he was a bit of a drip as well!
Jo: And the house was very suburban, that’s all I remember was, I like walked into this house and I was like-
Jaime: That was, was that, I don’t really know the chronological, um, ordering, but like, I had like a ponytail, and I had a, possibly-
Jo: You were probably like driving a minivan.
Dana: You were teaching, you were teaching, weren’t you?
Jaime: Cause wasn’t I [indecipherable]
Jo: It’s okay, Jaime, I [indecipherable]
Dana: You were like in Phoenix or something.
Jaime: Yeah so, so what was that, after a bit I, so like “I smell apples” was the ending of my character, right? So like that, was that after a bit-
Dana: Right, and then you got rev- you were brought back-
Jaime: Right.
Dana: And then you kind of disappeared for a bit.
Jaime: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Dana: Yes. Yeah, um-
Jaime: Yeah.
Dana: The, um, the, the, uh, the fans [laughs] were, um, confused by that, were like what?
Jaime: I d- I’m confused, I’m confused! [laughs]
Jo: Not just the fans, not just the fans.
Jaime: Well, I actually, um, I, I, I really want to go back and see that scene, um, I, I feel like you came to, I don’t, I was living in like suburbia-
Dana: Mhm.
Jaime: And, and didn’t you come to-
Jo: I don't remember.
Jaime: -the house and I, I think you came to-
Jo: I remember that horrible house though, because it was like, it… [makes disgusted face]
Jaime: It was so weird and I was like hello, I’m kind of like a completely different woman!
Jo: It was like very Stepford, I like, I walked in and, I don’t know why Myka was so accepting, I would’ve taken a baseball bat to the house, gonna be like, we’re leaving!
Jaime: So, so, so, so, I, so I, Jack, so Jack, Jack-
Jo: Get out of here, you drank the Kool Aid!
Jaime: I remember Jack was there and I was like, um, uh, oh, like this, like, like this doesn't work because of this and this doesn’t work because of that, and I was having a little, kind of like a creative difference with him, and, and he left for the day, he left for the day, and I really want to go back and see that s- that, that scene, because I remember I was asking him if I could, yeah, I know it’s, it says this but could I play it like this? And I do- I remember he didn’t want me to for the storyline, but I remember he left. [laughs] So I’d love to go back and see, I, I remember think- feeling like I was quite naughty, that I actually got away with it, but, uh-
Dana: Oh, I am loving all the subversive shit that was happening behind the scenes. [laughs]
Jaime: Yeah. [laughs]
Jo: Do you remember the park bench as well? Remember that scene, it was-
Jaime: Oh, yeah, a bench.
Jo: Wasn’t that a bench?
Jaime: Oh, that was a love scene, that was a love scene.
Jo: That was a, yeah, we really went for that one. [all laugh]
Jo: Everyone was like, what? And I’m like, well, we’re doing it. Might as well!
Jaime: [laughs] And we’re in like, Toronto, and everyone behind the camera, like, they’re very blokey, and it’s not in the script, and then they're like, “oh I didn’t, they’re, they’re, oh I didn’t see that coming!” [laughs]
Jo: They were like, what are you guys doing? We’re like, we’ll figure it out! [laughing]
Jaime: Exactly! We’re just doing our own thing. [laughs]
Dana: Oh, a little, a little mutiny, a little bit! [laughs] Well we, we, we’ve ha- we’ve had such incredible conversation so far, and I have so many fan questions for you, and if we were onstage everyone would get to come up to the mic-
Jaime: Aw.
Dana: -and ask you questions, but I do have a bunch of questions that were sent in, um, so I do want to get to your fans, because your fans are so integral to keeping this like-
Jo: That’s why we’re here.
Dana: -story alive. Uh, let’s see here. Let’s kick it off. Alright, so wellsbering wants to know, what personality traits do you share with your characters?
Jaime: Well I think, I think that, um, I, uh, definitely always get cast as the baddie for whatever reason, but then I think that, um, really the quirky mess that I, I, I morphed into is basically me. [all laugh]
Jo: I like that answer, that’s great. Um, I, uh, am very A-type when it comes to certain things, and Myka very much, I’m very like, flowy, Myka wa- didn’t flow, but there are certain parts of my life where I’m not flowy around. My work is one of them, writing is another one. Um, and I’m very afraid of letting people down. I think that’s why I've been, I was te- telling a lot of the people that I was talking to today that, you know, the reason I didn’t do this a lot when the show was on, I couldn’t understa- i was like, why do people wanna meet me? They're gonna meet me and be disappointed.
Dana: Ohhhh.
Jo: Yeah.
Dana: I think everyone thinks that though, I think that’s very common.
Jo: I think tha- yeah, I think that’s the human condition, right?
Dana: Yes.
Jo: Um, but, but I think Myka and I share that sort of reserve, you know, that thing where you’re like I don’t, no, don’t get too close. I’m like a Monet, stay back. [laughs]
Jaime: And I, I think that was part of the chemistry as well, it’s like, you have that kind of like, you know, protectio- protective-
Jo: Yeah.
Jaime: -kind of like, edge. And so it’s like, if, I think that i- in a way, the gift that we had by it not being written for us is, if had been written we would’ve, the characters would’ve made each other, um, accessible to each other far too quickly. It was like the slow burn of, Myka could be quite prickly, and my character was completely messed up so it was kind of like, this kind of like energy between them where they were kind of like, you know, like working each other out, feeling each other out-
Jo: Is there? Is there an energy there?
Jaime: And then the laughs were well earned, and the smiles, and the deciding to work together was well earned. There was a, a lot of suspicion around each other, and when they opened up or they kind of let their guard down, it was hard earned, and and it was like, you know, something you would wanna rejoice at.
Jo: Yeah, aw, I love that.
Dana: Um, okay, so this is from mayberrycosplay, uh, you may remember mayberrycosplay, I believe one of them dressed as HG at a con, uh-
Jaime: Oh!
Dana: -but they wondered-
Jaime: I’ve seen a few HGs.
Dana: You’ve seen a few HGs.
Jaime: [laughs]
Dana: This is for Jo about, uh, Myka’s experience with ovarian cancer and, uh, like, how the awareness of this silent killer of women, like how that storyline, what that storyline meant to you and how it felt to portray that?
Jo: I was really nervous about that storyline, you know, anything that has affected people and their families and, and it’s always, I, you know, difficult territory to walk as an actor, especially in a show like Warehouse where there's so much happening on such a grand level that I’m like, are they going to pay attention to this? Are they going to really honor a storyline like this? was my concern, you know, like very often things like that are added like, uh, it’s like putting a robot arm on a story, and you're like oh, and by the way, there’s ovarian cancer! And so I was really, you know, concerned about showing up for that and, and, and and serving it in a way that people understood and, and could identify with that, you know, it’s such a catharsis, that’s what I think it’s supposed to be. Um, so it was, uh, I, the fans told me I pulled it off, that’s the only way that I know.
Dana: Well it meant a tremendous amount to, to mayberrycosplay and so that’s why they, they sent that in because it, it really affected them because of their own personal-
Jo: Yeah.
Dana: -you know, family journeys and such.
Jo: Well I’m so, so, thank you, I mean, I’m still wondering, you know, I worked really hard to make sure that was in there. We’ve all lost somebody to cancer, we all know what that’s like, we all know- I mean, I mean, I certainly have, to feel a lump and be like [does the Home Alone face] you know. I have two friends right now who are going through it, so I try to honor it in the best way. I- it’s one of the things that makes me want to be an actor, uh, that I think is so special about it is that you get to tell stories that people, it’s a group catharsis, you know, so I’m glad that, glad they think I, the only thing that, if they think I sh- I showed up then... [laughs] yes, good, good, good.
Dana: Um, let’s see here, cloxy813 wants to know what was your favorite, favorite scene to film together?
Jo: Probably the heaving bosoms scene. I was excited for the heaving bosoms scene, which was all like [mimes placing gun to forehead] kill me!
Jaime: [laughs]
Dana: Hashtag heaving bosoms scene.
Jo: It was so hot that day, I remember my tank top-
Jaime: So hot, oh my god, it was like-
Jo: It was like, my tank top, I would like look down and find, I was like, my boobs are out, um. [laughs] I just saw him sign, them sign, um.
Jaime: We were by that lake, I just wanted to dive in there. It was-
Jo: Yeah, yeah, yeah, but I loved, I loved, I loved doing that scene, I have to say. And, and the chess scene, I remember that.
Jaime: Oh yeah.
Jo: I remember that very well. Um, I really enjoyed my work with Jaime because I, as I said, you know, there’s not a lot of scenes that are two women just being women. It was so, it was like a breath of fresh air and so I, I wasn't, I was, uh, you know, a lot of the times Myka was there to witness Pete-
Jaime: Or, or, or to laugh, or to kind of laugh and sigh at his super funny jokes.
Jo: The funny jokes... um, so, so it was so nice to not ha- be in a scene from that point of view. So often women are are written as accessories-
Jaime: Yeah.
Jo: You know, and, and this was a storyline where I felt like she was a whole person and I could be like a whole, real person, I didn't have to be like-
Jaime: I, I, I, I, I was on a show called Hustle and there was a character on it called Danny Blue, and he had all the funny lines, and one of the refrains that I had was “oh Danny. Oh Danny,” where every time he said something cheeky or naughty or a joke I’d go “oh Danny,” and I remember just being so excited to get the job, but then after awhile like me saying “oh Danny” really wore thin, especially as off camera I feel like I was more witty! [laughs] In that space I was much more funny, but all the funny was written for him, and I was going “oh Danny.” So when I came in I really, I kind of, um, you know, I knew the frustration of playing the, kind of, you, you know-
Jo: Straight man.
Dana: The “oh Danny.”
Jo: -if you were playing, right, right, the brainiac, uptight brainiac, and Pete had all the funny lines, so obviously we were in a lot of scenes with the rest of the cast and keeping the story going, but I felt as though all the character stuff that we had as, as women came from the scenes when we were on our own, and obviously that first scene with the grappler, um, you know, was, it was kind of the first scene where I’d been playing kind of like a little, kind of kind of like sneaky little looks and curiosity and fascination with this woman-
Dana: Yeah, we noticed.
Jaime: And, but, but, I, but, it wasn’t until the grappler scene that I thought that, that i was starting to get this, kind of, this chemistry going, and then there was a scene, do you remember the scene where I didn’t know how to work a computer or open it, it was like a, I was like a monkey-
Jo: Yeah [laughs] yeah.
Jaime: I was like a, it was like, I didn’t know what this is, we were-
Dana: Well, I mean in, in f- in fairness you had been in bronze for a long time.
Jaime: -we were in like a stu- a student room, a student's room, it was-
Jo: Yeah, we were at the college, we were at U of T.
Jaime: And, and. and we’d, it was the first time we’d deci- you’d, you’d kind of begrudgingly decided that we could work together, and HG was kind of a little thrilled, and you were a bit begrudging and-
Jo: Yeah.
Jaime: There was all, we, we still had to, ‘cause like, in sci-fi there’s a lot of storyline and exposition and kind of fantastical stuff, which is super fun, but actually as actors you really get excited about the character stuff and there was always just this great character stuff whenever we were on our own with a scene-
Jo: Yeah.
Jaime: -um, because we didn’t have to worry so much about servicing all the other characters, we just serviced each other.
Dana: Well, you know, there are only two kinds of queer women. It is thrilling or begrudging, it’s one or the other. [all laugh]
Dana: They fit perfectly in there.
Jaime: I mean maybe that’s why it resonated so well, and maybe it was the reason it was so great, that it wasn’t written, because you had these two kind of like, kind of sli- slightly spiky kind of like flawed women, kind of like o- one, you know, one not particularly into the other at all, you know, so-
Jo: It was interesting, I still remember, I still remember receiving that energy and receiving that stuff and realizing, sort of plotting, cause I’m like, how long would it take Myka to figure this out?
Jaime: [laughs]
Jo: Seriously, I was like, cause, Joanne is not her,, I’m, you know, I’m wasn’t in the box that she, I always thought, Jack’s like, you’re exactly like that character, I’m nothing, I’m not- [laughs] I mean there’s a part of me that’s uptight but there's a part of me that’s most definitely not, so I was like how, and I really wanted to do the discovery of it within her, the like, this, the, this feeling started, and then her sort of, and M-Myka to me as a character as a whole was always somebody who was afraid, this is somebody who was always very scared of everything and presented themselves in this very [mimes acting stuffy and uptight] way because there was so much going on here [gestures to heart] and it was slow in the five seasons, I really wanted her to like, you know, relax and start laughing and not be so, and I was like, there’s a certain amount of wonder that was like-
Jaime: Endless wonder.
Jo: -ohhhh, ohhhhh, ohhhh, like you kind of see her, one of the things about that journey is you start to see her discover sort of herself and her own feeling surrounding that, which I thought was really special.
Jaime: And also you, um, you, you kind of ended up, you, you know, HG was kind of like a tricky character and she was always one step ahead, um for, that first season, but then when she started to fall apart, you were the one that kind of put her together, and then I felt like there was also this humor introduced, this lightness introduced to your character through the humor el- elements-
Jo: Yeah.
Jaime: -and the surprise, which was, um, really lovely for your character.
Jo: Yeah, I, I think for m- for me, you know, it was a decision I made like in season two that I k- she had to evolve and grow and sort of, um, I couldn’t, I was, I was, I was like, I can’t keep coming to work and putting a giant stick up my ass [laughs] like we’re doing, like I need just to like expand her and go towards her relaxing and really finding, I think for her the big thing was always finding connection, you know, this-
Dana: Sure.
Jo: -we, we see in the beginning of the show is, it’s very cut off, very isolated, very like, and I, she lost her partner, that was, when I read that script, immediately I was like, this is someone who’s so scared of losing people again that she’s never gonna let anyone else in, and that was sort of like my understanding of her. And when Jaime came on, it was such a great way to explore that, Myka opening, you know, as feelings developed, her opening, you know-
Dana: Well, that, the growth, the character journey that both of your, your characters went on, I think that is what makes the show still so enduring to fans, like why they feel so connected to it, because we do, we saw that journey, you know, both of you had your own journeys to go on and you somehow managed to cross, cross paths, and it may not have ended the way fans had wanted it to, but we still go so much out of it.
Jo: I’m so glad.
Dana: I wish it was endgame, but what can I do?
Jaime: We, we, we need a spinoff show for Jo and I, we, we need a spinoff show.
Dana: Okay, yes, the spinoff, okay! You need to talk about that because-
Jaime: Who do we need to talk to to make that happen?
Dana: I got in a lot of trouble on Twitter yesterday for not asking a spinoff question, uh, what, like, what would a spinoff look like between between HG and Myka?
Jo: I think it would be have, to be now, which we-
Dana: Yeah.
Jo: And we’d have to get her, there’s no ponytails in this story, there’s no suburbs, there’s no fucking ponytails, um, no-
Jaime: I won- I won- I wonder if, um, it could be now, but, or, I wonder if I, I had to come in for a mission and then I actually pulled you back into my time, that might be an interesting way to turn it on its head.
Dana: Ooh, Jaime Murray, there we go!
Jaime: If we both had to go back-
Dana: I love me some period.
Jaime: -into my time or you know what made me think that [she does the Jaime Murray hair flip™] what I-
Jo: [laughs]
Jaime: I saw that, I saw that ne- The Nevers-
Jo: I miss that hair flip!
Jaime: -the, the, the a- the adverts for The Nevers on HBO, and I’m like that is the HG Wells spinoff right there, and I was like super fucked that I wasn’t in that, and then I read that Joss Whedon was a consultant and I was like [inaudible] really bad, so, but, anyway I think that that’s what we should do. I, I’m also obsessed with that time period.
Jo: I mean, yeah, and also like it was real, yeah-
Jaime: It was the beginning of ps-
Jo: Yeah.
Jaime: -psychology, of like Tesla, of of like different thoughts, there was like, they were like spiritual, um, kind of scientists and atheism and there was all it this opportunity for change, which actually wasn’t taken, but it was actually, it’s super interesting right at the time, there was suffragettes-
Jo: Also a fish out of water for me would be so wacky, because I’m a fish out of water too, alright.
Dana: I’m curious if yo all saw the Saturday Night Live sketch the other, uh, last week with, uh, lesbian period drama-
Jaime: Oh!
Dana: -and how, how every lesbian, like anything that features lesbians now has to be- [laughs]
Jaime: Well have you e- have you ever-
Dana: -it’s like the Edwardian or, like the Edwardian times.
Jaime: Have you guys read Sarah Waters, do you know this?
Dana: Oh, of course!
Jaime: Like, so, and maybe that is actually what helped me get to HG Wells, but I loved those books when-
Dana: Oh, they’re so amazing.
Jaime: -I was growing up and I feel like we should make those o- we should remake one of those b- Jo, you’ve got to read those books, and then-
Jo: I’m writing it down! I’m taking notes!
Jaime: Oh, it’s amazing.
Dana: You two would be amazing in her most recent one.
Jaime: She writes these amazing Edwardian, Edwardian kind of wanton lust and then there’s like, like the vervain or whatever, that kind of drug that they used to take back then-
Jo: Opium?
Jaime: -so it’s like slightly, kind of like psychedelic, oh, it’s amazing, yeah, she’s amazing.
Dana: [laughs] Well, we unfortunately are out of time, and it’s been so much fun to talk to the two of you, and I, I love the love that you have for your characters, for your friendship, for the fans, uh, it’s, it’s so lovely to see, and thank you so much for making this work in your schedules, I know you’re both super busy doing your own projects, um, and I want to think Mark. Mark, you’re amazing, thank you so much for, for interpreting.
Jaime: Thank you, Mark!
Jo: Thank you, Mark!
Dana: Um, do you have anything you want to end with, to say to the, to the Bering lesbians out there?
Jaime: Well, first of all, I want to say that, um, if anyone sends me messages to, you know, pictures or anything that that Jo needs to see, I’ll make sure that Jo, Jo gets it, ‘cause she’s not on social media, and I’ll, I’ll share stuff with her so that she can kind of know the love from the community.
Dana: Yeah, great.
Jo: I think, um, I’m actually gonna try to put together a newsletter because I’m trying to get my shows made and I could use this community, you know, to help-
Dana: Oh, we will support you to the end! We will march off that cliff with you.
Jaime: I could help you make a Twitter account, just for our community.
Jo: I don’t wanna do Twitter, I wanna do a newsletter. [laughs] I don’t wanna, I don’t know how many characters are in it, but it’s not enough. [laughs]
Jaime: But Jo, Jo, you have to actually read some of the fanfiction. The fanfiction is epic.
Jo: I have a book that I got, somebody wrote a book-
Jaime: Unbelievable, oh my god.
Jo: -like a novel.
Jaime: They’re brilliant, these people are brilliant, like best fans ever.
Dana: There is some really incredible work out there.
Jaime: Well, do you want to-
Jo: I just wanted to say thank you to everyone, um, you know, I don’t do these very often, and just like, the outpouring of love, like just the connection, I really appreciate it, I’m so grateful, so thank you.
Jaime: Yeah, it’s such a beautiful community. I feel really proud to have been welcomed into it and, uh, very grateful.
Dana: Well, we’ll hope to see you another time, and thank you all who turned in to this panel. [Jaime blows kisses]
Jo: Thank you.
Jaime: Bye, guys.
Dana: Do you smell apples?
Jaime: Bye, Jo, I love you so much.
Jo: Do you smell apples? I love you too. [blows kiss] I’ll talk to you soon.
Jaime: Yes, I’ll see you later. Bye bye, darlings.
Jo: Bye.
619 notes · View notes
reimagine7 · 3 years
Text
Adopted by whom?
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Warnings: lighty mentions of physical abuse
This was my third camp, I was really excited. Even though I knew these womens for only a year, they became like family to me, a few of them were even closer, like Mal and Rose, probably because we are closer to age, so we have a lot of fun together. Tobin and Christen are like moms for me, since the first day of camp they took me under their wings and were super protective, they were worried about my school work and if I ate well or if I drank enough water, even after camp they kept talking and asking how I am, and I talk about them so much that my moms got jealous, and said they are my team moms.
I told this to Tobin and Christen, they laughed at it and began to call me their daughter, so I started to call them mom. They wanted to meet my parents but that didn’t happen yet. Why? Because I didn’t tell them that I am adopted, or that I have two mothers, let alone that one of them is none other than Shannon MacMillan. I know I should but it is a sensitive topic for me and I'm scared that they will treat me differently after they find out about it. That’s why I haven't told anyone on the team about it yet, but I'm thinking about doing so after this camp.
“Kid!! I miss you so much” Tobin ran towards me and gave me a big hug. “Mom, we talked yesterday.” “I know, but I can't hug you on facetime.” “Okay, I miss you too.” “I don’t get a hug?” Christen asked and opened her arms for me to hug her, so I did. “Mama I miss you too.” “Hi sweetie. Excited for camp? How is school?” “The same, boring but my grades are good. And I can't wait for everyone to get here.”
“Siisss!!!” Rose and Mal scream as soon as they spot me in the looby and come running. “Rose!! Mal!! How are you guys?”. We jumped on each other and ended up in the ground on a group hug. “Hey, you weren’t as excited when you saw us. I feel betrayed.” Tobin complained pouting while watching our interaction. “Kids get up before you hurt each other.” Christen separated us and pulled us up. “Sorry mom, but I love you too.” I said to Tobin who still had a pout on her face, so I went and hugged her again.
The rest of the team were finally arriving in the lobby of the hotel, we were talking when Jill spoke up and designated our roommates for this camp, and I was with Tobin. We went up and went to our room. We had lunch soon so we chilled and talked for a bit in our room, until it was time for lunch. So here we are, everyone eating and having fun talking about everything.
On the table was Sonnett, Rose, Linds, Sam, Mal and myself. Sonnett was telling everyone a funny story about her family.
“I’m serious, we were at this party and I kept annoying this girl, who was a douchebag. I forgot about it and started to dance and have some fun, but then suddenly a boy cornered my sister and I heard the girl saying she was the girl who annoyed her and he was about to push her when the parents stepped in. Long story, but in short my sister ended up two days grounded because of that.” “You never told them the truth?” I asked her. “A few years later. They grounded me as well, that was not fun.” “I wish I could have a twin sister, so we could switch places all the time.” Rose commented. “I wish I could have a sister.” Mal complained.
“At least you have your parents all to yourself. You are the favorite.” Sam complained only to be mocked by Linds “Someone is grumpy because it’s not the favorite child.” “And you are?” “Of course.” “Alright, this is not what your brother says.” Sonnett interfered with a smirk. “But I'm for sure not the favorite, my parents don’t hide it.” “Me neither, I’m sure they love me but I have my doubts about who their favorite is. It’s probably Wilma, I don’t blame them.” Everyone laughed at Rose's statement.
Until Mal asked me a question. “What about you Y/n? I’m sure you are your parents favorite.” “Yeah, I don't know. My brother is 10 so... pretty tough competition.” “Wait! You have a brother?” Sonnett asked incredulously. “Yeah.” “Why have we never heard about it? We actually never heard much about your family Y/n.” One of them asked me. Shit, why do I have to open my mouth. “I don’t want to talk about it.” I tried to avoid their eyes so they would know that I didn’t want to talk about it. But Sonnett didn't get it. “Why not? Your parents can’t be that bad?” “Sonnett!! Shut up. Y/n/n, that’s okay, if you don’t want to tell us you don’t have to.” Lindsey said, trying to make me look at them. “But you know that you can tell us everything right?”
I didn’t want to talk about it, and if I stayed one more minute here I would cry, so I decided to leave for my room. “Yeah… I...I think I’m going back to my room. Bye.” “Y/n. Wait! We are not talking about it again. Come back.” Rose tried to stop me, but I stood up so fast that I didn’t even register my surroundings. So as soon as I turned around, I bumped into Ashlyn and her juice spread all over my shirt. Fuck! Ash began to apologise, but now I could feel everyone's eyes on me and all I wanted was to get out of here. “Sorry Speedy, you turn so fast. I…” “That’s okay.” I interrupted her, got free of her hands and walked as fast as I could out of the dinner room.
No one's pov
Meanwhile at the youngies table.
“That was odd.” Sam broke the silence. “I didn’t do it on purpose.” “We know Sonnett. Should we follow her? Or talk to Tobin?” Lindsey asked, trying to comfort Sonnett who was blaming herself for her teammate's outburst.
“Too late for that. Tobin is already coming on her momma bear mode. I’m always scared when she is like this.” Mal spoke looking at Tobin with wide eyes.
“Girls, what happened to Y/n? Why did she get out?” The girls looked at each other until Rose decided to answer Tobin’s question. “We don’t know exactly. We were talking about our families and when we asked about hers she got weird and said she would go to her room.” Tobin sighed and nodded. “Thanks, I will go check on her.”
Tobin pov
I knocked on the door and opened it, when I entered the room I saw Y/n laying on the bed looking at the ceiling.
“Hey, kid. What’s going on?” “Not now Tobin, I just want to be alone for a minute. I’m fine.” “Yeah, you’re not.” Y/n shakes her head and asks. “And how do you know that?” “For starters, you get out of the dinner earlier than usual and without saying goodbye. Then you call me Tobin, you never do that only when you’re not okay.”
With that Y/n sighed and sat on the bed. “It’s just a hard topic for me.” “Your family?” I asked, trying to understand, she just nodded her head.
We stayed in bed for a minute. I waited to see if she was giving me anything else, but that didn’t happen. “Fine, if you don’t want to talk about it, I get it. But let's at least take this shirt off.”
I helped her get up to take the dirty shirt off, but then I looked at her back and saw some scars on it. I was about to take a better look but she quickly pulled back down, trying to hide it. But it was too late, I had already seen it.
“Y/n, what are those marks on your back?” “Are from soccer.” She told me, not looking at me. “I’m not buying it. Tell me the truth.” “It’s nothing Tobin. Give up on this.” “Nope. Right there, you call me Tobin again. Come on kid, you know I won’t give up so soon. So buy us some time and tell me what’s going on.” “It’s hard, Tobs.” “And I’m here by your side, you can tell me everything. But I can’t help you if you don’t tell me what’s going on.” “Everything is fine now, it’s already in the past. But I'm still learning to trust people, so I normally don’t talk about it with others. I want to, but when I do I cry and I don't want to cry in front of the team.” “Kid, we will never judge you for crying.” “I know but I never had this, not until three years ago. So it is hard to let people in.” “What do you mean? You wanna tell me about it? “
She hesitated for a minute but nodded. She was about to say something when my phone rang. I looked at it and turned off the call, it was Christen but I couldn’t talk right now.
“It’s okay if you need to go. I’ll be fine.” Y/n told me in a low voice. “I’m here for you kid, you can trust me, after all i’m your mom isn’t I?” “Yeah. You are. It’s not actually complicated. It’s just that, my dad abandoned my family when I was 7, a month later my mom found out she was pregnant. Things were already tough, but my mom did everything she could for us to be happy, but a year later she died in a car crash.”
Tears began to fall from her face, so I put my hand on her back trying to comfort her.
“I’m sorry for that Y/n/n. You don’t need to keep going if you don’t want to.” “I want to tell you everything.” After a minute she stopped sobbing and spoke again. “Well, after that my father didn’t want us so we ended up in foster care and that’s why I don’t like to talk about my family. Is not because I don't trust you, but is because for most part of my life I didn't quite have one. I have just a few memories from my biological mother and I had to take care of my little brother during seven years of my life. Is not simple to talk about it. I was abused from the age of 8 until I turned 14 years old. That's where my marks are from, they hit on me just because they wanted to.”
I hugged her, but didn’t say a thing, I knew that’s what she needed right now. After a few minutes I spoke up. “Kid, I had no idea that you passed through this all. But I want to tell you that this doesn't change our relationship, I still love you and will fight everyone who messes with you, and you know Christen will as well.” “Thank you Tobs.”
After a minute of silence, I decided to ask her what I was scared to ask. “This is still happening? I want to do something about it. I won’t let any of this happen to you again.” “No, three years ago me and my brother got adopted. I told you the truth when I told you that everything is good now. They are amazing and are helping me to get better.” “That’s good. That’s why we never meet them? You didn’t want us to know your story?” “Yeah, that’s one of the reasons.” “One?” “Yeah, well the other one you will understand when you see my moms.” “Your moms?” I asked, still not sure I had heard it right. “Yeah, I got adopted by two moms.” “Oh, Megan will love this.” “I know.” “You want to come back for lunch or do you want to stay here?” “Stay here. Can we just watch a movie?” “Fine, but I choose.”
I jumped on top of her and got the remote so I could choose the movie. “No way, we are on my bed, so I choose.” She got the remote from my hands. “No no, I'm your mother so I choose.” “There’s nothing to do with it. I won’t give it to you.” “Yes you are.”
With that I began to tickle her, trying to get the remote back. Then there was a knock on the door and it opened, but we were too occupied to see who it was. “Okay kids, let's stop the fight.” Oh, that’s Chris. “Tell that to Tobs, she is the one attacking me.” “I see.” Christen separated us. “How are my girls? I’ve been told that I should come here to check on you both, but by the look of things I guess that is all sorted out now.” I looked at Y/n and she had a smile on her face. “I think we are better now right?” “Yeah, much better. Thank you Tobs.” “Of course, I'll always be here for you.” She hugged me and I gave a kiss on her head.
“Oh, I feel left out now.” “Sorry Chris, but Tobs will tell you everything later. But I know I can count on you as well. I’m going to change my shirt now and wash my red face.”
Y/n stood up and left the remote on the bed. “Yes, I got the remote.” I could see Y/n shaking her head and then closing the bathroom door, Chris came to me, gave me a quick peck and asked me what happened.
Your pov
I went to the bathroom to change my shirt and clean myself, and I could hear Tobin telling Christen a little bit of what I told her. “‘What was that about?’ ‘The girls were talking about family stuff on the table and the topic is a little complicated for her. She lost her mom really young and lived in foster care most part of her life, and just recently got adopted. I tell you more later, don’t worry about it.’” I’m glad I finally got to share my story with someone else, and it is no surprise that the two of them were the first to know, I like them a lot.
While I was in the bathroom my phone started to ring.
“Kid, your phone is ringing and is your mom. She wants to facetime.” Tobin yelled from the bed. “Which one?” I yelled back. “Humm… mom Mac?!” Oh, maybe that is a great time to introduce them.
“Could you answer for me? I’m almost finishing.” “Me?” “Yeah, you didn’t want to meet her? That’s the time. She wants to talk to you both as well.” There was a silence in the room, until Chris spoke. “I don’t think that is a good idea.” “You’ll like to talk with her. Don’t you trust me?” “Fine.” Tobin answered me and accepted the call, ready to talk to my mom.
“Hi hon… Oh, hi Tobin!” I could hear my mom speaking. I was already changed, but I wanted to see their reactions while meeting my mom. “Hi… wait your Shannon MacMillan.” Toby speaks and stays with an open mouth. “Yes, and I was told that you are my daughter’s roommate. Oh, hi Christen I didn't see you before. How are you doing?” “Your daughter?” Now was Christen's time to stay in shock. “Yeah Y/n. Is she alright?” “Yeah, but… what?” Tobin was speechless, so I decided to intervene.
“Oh hi mom, sorry I was in the bathroom.” “Hi honey and taking by Tobin and Christen's faces I believe you hadn’t told them about me, am I right?” “Maybe? I actually didn’t tell anyone on the team, I dodged their questions about my family. You know how I am, I wanted them to get to know me first.” “I know.” “But I had told Tobin almost everything, I just kept your name out of it. She saw my scars and made me explain it.” I lightly elbowed Tobin, trying to take her off her transe. “Made you?” I think it worked. “Y/n!!”
“I’m kidding, kind of. She just got overprotective and wanted to punch the person who made me those, so I had to explain the story to her.” “Yeah, I was right she is definitely your team mom. And don’t worry Tobin, they are already taken care of.” Tobin laughed and poked me in my sides “I told you, now even your mom agrees with me. But I gotta say this is kind of crazy.” “Whatever, that doesn't mean you can choose the movie.” “Movie?” Mom asked, not quite understanding what we were talking about. So Chris came to the rescue. “When I got here they were in a tickle fight, because Tobin wanted to choose the Netflix movie and Y/n had the remote.” I completed it. “Christen saves me, but then Tobin got the remote, so it looks like we will be seeing her movie.”
“Seems like you’re having fun. I just called to tell you that the thing you buy on the internet has arrived, I hid it in the garage. I'm sure your mama won’t find it there.” Great, my mama birthday present has arrived. “Cool, and is everything ok?” “Yes, as we expected. We’ll call you later to talk more, I just took that I was alone now so I could warn you.” “Thanks mom.” “Bye honey. Bye Tobin and Christen.” “Bye Shannon.” They say in unison.
So I turned off the call and looked at them, they had a surprised look on their face so I got ready for the questions. Mainly the questions were about why I didn't tell them or the team about it, how I ended up with them and I had to explain my whole story again for Christen. In the end, it was already time for team meeting and we were getting ready to go.
As we waited for the elevator, I remembered to ask them something. “Guys, please don’t tell the team nothing about it.” “Why not? Speedy, I already told you that they won’t treat you any different.” Tobin scolded me. “I just... I will tell them when I feel comfortable, but for now just keep this secret for me. Please mom!!” “You can’t pull the mom card like this.” “Why not? You told yourself that you’re my team mom.” Tobin kept staring at me until she gave up. “Fine. But I think you should at least tell them about your mom, because if they find out about it from another person they're gonna be mad.” Christen punches Tobin in the arm. “Tobin! They are not gonna be mad at you Y/n. Just at the moment, and then they will just fill you with questions. But the last part is going to happen either way.” “Oh, so different from what I said.” Tobin said with sarcasm, but Christen sent her a killer look. “Sorry! But if by any chance, someone annoys you because of who your mother is, tell me and I will kick their ass.” Tobin told me with a serious look.
“You mean if they mocked me because Tobin Heath is my mom?” I tried to contain my laugh. “Oh, shut up!!” She got my head and began to rub it. “Mom stop!!” “Kids stop with it. Let’s go or we are gonna be late.”
With that we entered the elevator and I could see that Chris had a worried face on. My story must have affected her, she has a sad expression, so I decided to lighten her mood a little bit. “Oh Christen, you don’t need to be mad. You and mom are a couple, so that means you are my mom as well.” I hugged her and she kissed my head. She tightened the hug, and I knew some tears were rolling down her face. “Thank you Y/n, you for sure can come for me anytime you need. I’ll always be here for you.” “I know. You’re the mom I listen to but also the mom who grounds me, and Tobin is the mom who takes me out of the ground, and also the one who tries to cover my mess.” Christen rolled her eyes, understanding what I was trying to do. She cleaned the tears that had fallen out and shook her head, but now with a smile on her face. Tobin on the other hand protested. “I would never do that Christen!” “Why can't I believe that?”
With that the elevator door opened and Christen got out first, then Tobin raised her hand for me to hit it. I love these two. We got to team meeting and discussed our training sessions, how our week is going to be and other things. The meeting took about an hour. After it, the whole team went to dinner, me and Tobin were talking about the conversation we had early about my past soccer teams and how my mom is a crazy fan, so we got our food and sat at some table don’t even looking to see who was on the other ones. But as we were talking Christen, Megan, Ash, Julie, Ali, Alyssa and Carli sat at our table as well.
“I’m telling you Tobs, once she got so mad about a bad call that she almost got inside the field to yell at the referee, luckily my 9 years old brother stopped her.” Tobin was laughing her ass out. “I would die to see that.” “Who did that?” Megan asked, breaking the bubble we were on. I then noticed everyone else that was on the table with us.
“What?” I asked, not quite sure what she was talking about. “Who almost got in the field?” “My mom.” “Oh…” “She seems cool.” Ash responded. “She is, when she is not mad. Despite that, she is awesome, my family is really supportive.” “Your brother plays soccer as well?” Alis asked. “No, he hates sports. But he loves to cheer for me, so he goes for all the games he can.” “Oh, this is so cute, I would love to meet him.” JJ awed with my answer. “He for sure will love to go to the mall with you and Chris, I can guarantee that he would be a better company then Tobs.” “Hey kid! You are just as bad as I am.” Tobin protested. “Ok you're right. But I’m telling the truth, he and my mom go on walks for hours.” “I’m certainly taking him out when we meet him.” Chris gave me a wink, letting me know that this was for sure happening some time soon.
“And who encouraged you to play soccer? Your mom or your dad?” Alyssa asked, wanting to know more about my family. I took a big breath and answered her. “Oh, it’s a little more complicated than that. But I can for sure tell you that it was not my father.” “Why is that? He doesn't like sports?”
I take a look at Tobin and Christen and them both nod their heads encouraging me to tell them. “No, it’s because… I don't have a father, at least not one that I care about.” “Sorry I didn’t want to put you through that.” Alyssa told me with a worried expression. “That’s fine, I'm ok with that now.” “So is it just you, your brother and your mom?” Ali asked. “Well, my moms.” “Excuse me?” Megan almost spilled all the water she was drinking with the new information. “My moms. Me, my brother and my two moms.” “Oh, that is awesome. I already liked you before, now I like you even more.” Megan cheered and high five me. “Because of my parents?” “Yeah, you were already cool, now that I know that you for sure support my community you got points with me. Tell me about them!” “They are awesome, I've only been with them for three years, but they changed my life when they adopted me.” Ops! Shouldn’t have said the last part. “Wait, you are adopted?” Ali asked. “Yep.”
“Who is adopted?” Emily asked while getting close to the table. “Y/n” Alyssa answered. “What? You never told us.” Mal and the other youngies were all surrounding us now. “That’s why you run away during lunch?” I looked around and by now the whole team was at the table listening to the conversation.
“So about that…” I look at Tobin and send her a ‘help me’ look, she quickly understands me and steps up. “Guys, less questions okay? If she hasn't told us about it yet it’s because she is not comfortable with it, so let’s give her time.”
Everyone nodded, but Megan was still interested in my family. “Fine, but I want to know more about your moms okay?” “That I can do, but I think you already know at least one of them.”
I took my phone and showed her a picture of my family. Her mouth drops and she passes the phone for Ash, who passes to Ali, who passes to Carli, who finally says something.
“Wait a minute, your mom is Shannon MacMillan?” “Yeah.”
Everybody's jaw drops, except for Christen and Tobin because they already knew, and the questions started again. I finally told them my story and Tobin was right, they were really supportive and of course asked a lot of questions, but I'm fine with it. They are my family now.
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angelmavmurdock · 3 years
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The Boy Next Door
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WARNINGS: SMUT, ORAL (fem+mal), DIRTY TALK, PRAISE, CHOKING, THIGH RIDING, MENTIONS OF DRUGS.
inexperienced!reader x stoner!tom
(inspired by Ginny and Georgia)
The new house was a lot bigger than our last house. But of course that's due to my mother marrying a man 30 years older than her who owns some workout company. She's a gold digger is what I'm trying to say. Ever since I can remember, whatever guy she was dating dictated where we would live, where my brother and I would go to school, what I'd wear, how I'd act and even what friends I had. Or, lack there of. Always being the 'new girl' was beginning to get exhausting so I never really had friends. If I gained any friends then I knew that we'd get close then I'd move and we'd stay in touch for about a month before they move on and forget about me.
y/n. Always the new girl.
"y/n would you help us, please?" Mum asked in an annoyed tone, brushing past me with a box in her hands.
I rolled my eyes and sighed, walking to the car and beginning to lift stuff out and into the house. It was a huge driveway - unnecessarily large - and everyone on the street was the same. Everyone in the town was the same. It was a rich, suburban area. No place I hadn't seen before but we definitely didn't belong. My Mum just shapeshifted into whoever she thought Greg would want. Greg being my 'step-dad'. He's 63. My Mum is 33. How is that even allowed.
We unloaded everything from the cars and waited on the trucks arriving with everything else. Cameron and I scuffed our shoes as we strolled through the huge house, taking in everything and familiarising ourselves with our new home.
"I'm so glad I'm not at school anymore because being in a class with snobby assholes like these people would be shit." Cameron said, crossing his arms as he gestured to the family across the road.
I walked over to him and watched too. A family of 5 - two girls, one boy, Mum and a Dad - were dressed rather nicely in dresses and suits. They came out of their house and waltzed to their Tesla nonchalantly with their noses in the air. The eldest girl looked around my age. She would probably be in some of my classes.
"I'm not looking forward to Monday." I groaned.
We stood in comfortable silence, watching the Tesla inquisitively as it drove off with the family inside.
"Trucks arrived!" Mum called from the front door.
We both shared our sibling look with one another then walked back out with reluctance. Mum was standing in the middle of the driveway with her hands on her hips, watching as Greg approached the van and signed some forms off. Cameron and I walked down and stood either side of her. She grinned and wrapped her arms around us, rubbing both our backs simultaneously.
"I've got a good feeling about this, guys." She took a deep breath.
"At least someone does." I remarked.
She ignored the comment and we watched Greg do practically nothing. I mean he was basically an ancient artefact.
"I've heard your new school is wonderful. The pass grade levels are insanely good and there's a lot of people there to befriend." Mum spoke positively.
"My last 6 schools also had a lot of people to befriend but of course, I always lose them because we move so bloody much." I clenched my jaw.
"Well...this time it's different."
I scoffed, "You always say that."
"I swear this time!"
"And that!"
"y/n I don't know what you want me to do. Greg is a great guy who is supporting us fully! I mean, look at this place! Surely you can't be mad we're living here." Mum shook her head, removing her arm from my waist.
"I'd rather live in a box with just you two than live in a huge house with some random guy in a town I hate." I argued then stormed away dramatically up the driveway.
I got into the house and slammed the door, grabbing the banister and stomping up the flight of stairs. There was one flight then a landing then another flight. This house was too bloody big.
I finally found what was meant to be my new room and slammed that door shut. Just for good measure. I huffed and sighed as I leaned my back against the white, wooden door.
The room was stark white and empty, only a bay window to give some character. I might hate Greg and my mother and this whole situation but I loved this bay window. I snaked in between the boxes and suitcases and sat on the wooden ledge. I kicked my shoes off before sitting my feet up and watching outside. My room faced the front of the house so I could see the movers offloading furniture and boxes off while Greg stood helplessly.
I groaned and leaned my head back, closing my eyes, just wanting to crawl into a shell and hide.
A slam of a car door forced my eyelids open and I jumped slightly.
"Where do you think you're going?!"
I heard a woman's voice from outside. I looked outside curiously, scanning the street with my eyes to find where the noise was coming from. It finally caught my eye and I had to sit up and switch sides of the window to look properly.
A red-headed woman and a curly headed boy were standing in the driveway.
Our next door neighbours apparently.
The boy was around my age, maybe a little older. He stumbled a little as he walked up the drive, his mother - I think - watching from behind her car door.
"I'm going to bed!" He shouted back.
"Not now you're not, you have to talk to me, Thomas!" She shouted, slamming her own car door.
Thomas.
He hung his head on his shoulders, "I need to sleep, mum."
"Well I just had to bail you out of jail for marijuana possession and use so you better talk to me."
Oof, I thought. He was a stoner. A criminal basically. But he was attractive from what you could see. Dark brown curly hair, tall enough, a sharp jawline, a good body from where I was sitting and a good style too - a hoodie with a denim jacket and jeans. But he was my neighbour. And a stoner.
"Mum can we just talk later?" He pleaded, running a hand through his hair.
"Tom we will talk about this right now." She said sternly.
He rolled his eyes and shook his head, turning his back to her and walking away. I watched him with a slight smile. He really was attractive.
"Thomas Holland you get back here right now!" His mother shouted.
"When I'm not on drugs, I'll talk." He stated.
His mother stuttered then just grunted in annoyance, allowing him to go inside.
I kept my eyes on him, my smile still on my face as he started to walk into his house. He suddenly turned his head with a confused expression then looked up. Straight at me through my window.
I froze in shock, eyes widening, mouth parting. He slowly smirked and nodded his head at me before going inside.
I sunk off the window ledge in humiliation, snaking to the floor and mumbling how stupid I was and how embarrassing that was.
"y/n! Come meet your neighbour!" Mum shouted up.
My ears perked up then I leaped up to look out the bay window. The boy next door's mum was standing outside, chatting to my mum.
-
I hardly learned anything talking to his mum. Her name was Nikki Holland, she had a husband named Dominic who was a comedian and a writer. She was a photographer. Along with Tom - the oldest - she had three other sons: twins named Harry and Sam and then Paddy who was a good bit younger. I can't remember the exact age. My mum had nosily asked her about Tom and that was the only part I listened to.
"He's 18,"
"Dropped out of school last year,"
"Says he wants to be an actor,"
"Oh today? He got in trouble from the police about...you know what, that isn't important."
"You look so young to be a mother to a teenager. How old are you?"
"And you're 18, too?" "Still in school?" "What do you want to do?" "Ah, smart girl."
The conversation was brief and slightly awkward. She was clearly stressed about Tom and his situation so I slid out of the engagement pretty fast and escaped up to my room.
During the entirety of the weird conversation, the movers had put my bed, mattress and desk into my room. It felt a lot more homier.
-
It was the next night and I had finished dinner and immediately gone upstairs. I was not participating in any sort of 'family time'. I sat down on my bed and scrolled through my phone aimlessly.
A thump outside drew my attention away and I looked to my right at the regular window which faced our neighbours house.
I sat up and squinted to see out into the dark. It was Tom. He was halfway out his window.
I didn't even realise our windows faced each other. And here he was, one leg out the window and his other following on. He had thrown a backpack down which caused the dull thump on the grass - which I only assume contains weed - and now he was escaping his house.
I got out of bed and walked to the glass, peeking out to see what he was doing.
He climbed impressively down the wall and jumped the last few metres, landing in a Spider-Man like pose. Admirable, I thought as he picked up his back pack and slid a skateboard out from a bush. He brushed it off then slotted it under his armpit.
He was sporting a black t-shirt with a dog-tag necklace and some distressed deep blue jeans with a denim jacket over top and a baseball cap placed on backwards that sat on top of his curly head of hair.
He looked around in case he was going to get caught then looked up. Directly at me. Again.
This time I didn't shy away. I just made a gesture and mouthed 'what the fuck?' then he laughed to himself and looked back up at me.
'Don't be so nosy, neighbour', he mouthed.
I squinted and shook my head in disapproval. He just smirked boyishly then walked to his driveway where he flipped his skateboard and skated off into the night.
I gulped and sat back on my bed, feeling my heart rate slow back down.
But curiosity filled my brain.
Where was he going?
-
Just as Sunday night came around, I had finished decorating my room. My pictures and paintings hung on the wall, along with some mirrors to fill the blank space of the white walls. My bed was cosy and was filled with throw blankets, fluffy sheets and way too many pillows. My desk was organised and my laptop sat atop the white surface, making it look a lot more professional than I had anticipated.
I had turned my bay window into a reading nook. A few blankets lay on the ledge and a couple pillows too, along with my current read.
I had seen Tom sneak out a few nights ago but I tried to stay away from the regular window, only ever sitting on the bay one because I couldn't see Toms room from there.
However, it didn't shield me from him completely.
I would see him outside in their front garden playing games with his brothers and sometimes I'd watch them from just over the top of my book. The way he played with their dog was cute. I had gathered her name was Tessa and I knew she was a staffy because we used to have one. He'd throw balls or sticks for her and sometimes she'd clamber on top of him with excitement. He'd dodge her licks but still clap her because she was excited after all.
Every once in a while he'd catch me looking down at him or I'd catch him looking up at me. Whenever it happened, it seemed as if everyone and everything disappeared. Like it was just us. Tunnel view. But then one of us would look away or stick the middle finger up or mouth 'fuck off'. Our unusual and silent rivalry was the closest thing to a friend I'd had in years.
But now, Mum, Greg and Cameron were going out to a nice dinner to celebrate the first week of living here. I thought it was an incredibly stupid idea so I decided to stay home alone and eat pizza.
They all left and Cameron immediately texted me.
Cammando: I hate you for leaving me
y/n: your fault not mine :)
I didn't really know what to do. I walked around the house and asked Alexa to play some songs but I couldn't be bothered dancing. I wasn't really in a dancing mood.
I just gave up and went back upstairs into my room. My windows were still open so before I got changed I went to close them and put down the blinds. I closed the bay window and then I went to the next one.
I looked straight ahead into Toms room and my jaw dropped.
He was hopping and hyping himself up in front of a punch bag...shirtless with gloves on. I watched as he punched the bag skilfully, moving his feet as if it was a choreographed routine. His damp curly hair hung onto his forehead and I could see glimpses of airpods in his ears. His back muscles tightened and flexed as he threw punches.
He moved around the bag and now I could see the front of him. He had a very visible six pack. I definitely didn't expect that from the stoner boy next door. If I thought he was attractive before...now I don't even know what I would call him.
Otherworldly, perhaps?
He suddenly looked up and I gasped, turning and slamming my back against the wall next to the window, wincing at the pain. Hopefully he didn't see me...
It was creepy to be staring at him. I shouldn't have done it.
I peeked back and he was back to beating the poor punch bag.
God, he was so hot.
I could feel the heat rising in my cheeks and ears, burning with lust. I gulped and looked away, closing the blind to stop myself from looking anymore.
I got changed into shorts and a burgundy Cambridge University jumper that used to belong to my Dad. He gave it to me the first time he properly left for a while and I still have it even though I see him more often.
I hopped downstairs and played some music while I sorted the pizza and chips out to eat.
I sat and ate while listening to music. Once I was finished, I cleaned everything up then went back upstairs into my room, shutting the door behind me and jumping onto my bed.
I scrolled through tiktok aimlessly, just filling the time before it was an acceptable hour to go to bed as a teenager.
I switched apps to Instagram when I lay on my side, my back facing my windows. I scrolled through for a while but a certain picture caught my eye.
I had to blink a few times to really look.
It was my so called 'best friend' who I hadn't talked to since I moved twice after befriending her and my ex-boyfriend. My ex. My only boyfriend I've ever had. My first kiss, my first date...my first time. My only time. We only had sex twice. Three if you count foreplay but I faked it. Actually I faked it all of the times. He was never good at it and I had no idea how to go about telling him because to be honest, I had no idea what to do either.
But my ex-best friend and my ex-boyfriend? She didn't even tell me. She didn't even think to ask me.
They were dressed nicely and holding each other's waists. It looked a little awkward but most of those pictures are because they are being taken by parents.
I looked through the comments.
OMG! Hot couple alert! You two are the cutest just marry already yall are too happy it's been the best year of my life baby
"WHAT?!" I exclaimed, sitting up sharply.
They had been together for a YEAR.
"Ugh!" I groaned and threw my phone across my room, hearing it basically break against the wooden floor.
"Rough night?" A voice spoke from my window.
I screamed, jumping with fear and successfully landing my ass on the floor.
I panicked and grabbed the first thing I could use as a weapon. A glass of water. It would have to do.
I quickly flung the water at the intruder, "WHAT THE FUCK, GET OUT!" I screamed, my eyes closed tightly in fear.
I heard the water splash over them but they still came in. I just threw the glass at them. It thumped against them dully and then crashed onto the floor.
"Ouch."
I slowly opened one eye and looked up at the figure who had just entered my room.
It was Tom.
He was in a grey t-shirt and black basketball shorts with a baseball cap placed on backwards, a backpack thrown over his shoulder.
"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING CLIMBING INTO MY ROOM?!" I shouted, standing up.
He was taller than me by a few inches but we were basically at eye level.
"I was clearly looking for some company but you then threw water over me and then a literal glass." He spoke calmly, wiping a hand over his wet face.
"How the hell are you being so calm about this?! You just intruded into my home!" I exclaimed.
"Well, darling, I have a thing called weed. It's great for calming you down. You clearly need some." He slung his bag around and went to open it.
"W-what? No, I'm not smoking weed!"
He sighed and slung his bag back, "Well, why are you being so uptight about this I just wanted to say hello." He smiled boyishly.
I licked my teeth in annoyance. He was so fucking attractive but he was so fucking annoying and I didn't even know him.
"You need to get out. I didn't invite you in here so you are not welcome." I stated, crossing my arms.
"Okay, yes. But also- my mother nearly just caught me sneaking out so it's a cover if she comes round here."
"Why would she come here?" I asked.
"Because she's a mad woman who hates me having a life apparently."
"You're an 18 year old who sneaks out of the house to smoke weed. I wouldn't call that a life." I remarked.
He smirked, "You know what, I like you."
He sat his bag down then started to walk slowly around my room, inspecting my pictures and decorations intricately.
I stuttered, not knowing how to react to this whole situation.
"I'm sorry, what the hell are you doing?" I asked, brows furrowed.
"You're quite an interesting person, I must say."
I sighed and shook my head at the ceiling.
"Ah, this makes sense." He picked up one of my camera's.
I scoffed, "What's that supposed to mean?"
He sat it down and picked up the next one, shrugging with a smug smirk.
"You like looking at things."
I gulped, red rushing to my cheeks.
"Clearly very beautiful things." He said, referring to my pictures on the walls.
"I'm just honoured I'm one of them."
I rolled my eyes and scoffed, "You wish you were."
"Oh but I am, aren't I?" He challenged, sitting my camera down.
I licked my back teeth and watched with heavy breath as he paced towards me slowly.
"I've never taken a picture of you before." I said matter-of-factly.
"You might not have but you definitely love a good stare, don't you?" He asked, his left eyebrow quirked cockily.
I noticed the unusualness of it and then looked into his dark, dilated eyes.
"I have no idea what you're talking about." I said quietly.
He laughed lowly, "So you weren't staring at me earlier when I was working out?"
I stuttered as we came face to face.
"You're stubborn but I feel like I know you," He placed his fingers under my chin, tracing up my jaw and to my ear where he tucked some of my hair behind.
"Because I've been looking at you, too." He whispered.
I practically melted and a whimper left my mouth, eyes rolling back.
He chuckled, "Already needy for me I see."
I looked up at him as his thumb swiped over my lips.
This whole situation was insane. I didn't even know how we got here. I didn't know how to feel, either. I had never been turned on like this before.
He slowly pushed his thumb into my mouth and I moaned around it, tasting his skin.
"Good girl." He praised, taking his thumb out and replacing it with his tongue.
I moaned again, feeling his lips on mine. His hands gripped my waist and I tangled my fingers into his hair.
He tasted of weed but I didn't mind it at all. He pushed me backwards until I hit the wall next to my bed. He gripped my hips tightly and I kept my hands in his hair. He must have gone for a shower since his workout because he smelled fresh and clean and his hair was damp.
I couldn't believe I was doing this. I was kissing a stranger. Who climbed into my room.
"Wait-" He pulled away briefly.
"Is your family home?" He asked.
"No, they're out all night." I answered breathlessly.
He smirked, "Good."
He suddenly lifted me up and I squealed, automatically wrapping my legs around his taut torso.
His tongue slipped between my lips again and I welcomed it. He lay me down on my bed and started to kiss down to my jaw and my neck.
I gasped and tugged his hair when he started kissing a certain spot on my skin. He got the message that I liked it and started licking and sucking on it. I arched my back slightly, moaning as he worked his tongue and lips on my skin.
He left the spot on my neck but kissed over my skin as he started to lift my jumper up. Panic and nerves suddenly settled in and I grabbed his hands, stopping his movements.
"You alright?" He asked breathlessly.
I swallowed, "I uh...I've never-"
His eyes widened, "You're a virgin?"
"No, no. I've had sex it just...it just wasn't that great." I bit my lip nervously.
He encased my lips in his and I relaxed to his touch.
"Do you want to?" He asked against my lips.
"Yes, fuck yes." I practically moaned into his mouth.
"I just need you to guide me through it." I said in between kisses.
He pulled away, "I can do that." He smiled.
He started to lift my jumper off and this time I let him. I sat up and he removed it, throwing it off the bed. He admired the pink bralette I was wearing and immediately pressed his lips and tongue to the valley of my breasts. He nipped and sucked on my skin and I moaned as he palmed one of my boobs while leaving marks on the other.
He came back up and kissed me again but flipped us over so I was now on top. He sat up and shuffled back against my headboard and pulled me onto his lap.
He brushed my hair off my shoulders and cupped my chin, taking me in.
"D'you wanna try riding my thigh?" He asked lowly.
I gulped, "S-sure."
He smirked and I straddled his left thigh, holding his shoulders.
"Just rock your hips back and forwa-"
"Fuck," I moaned, the rubbing of the different materials causing my core to clench.
"Does that feel good?" He asked, his breath fanning over my face.
His hands rested on my hips and he helped my movements.
"Feels so good." I moaned.
"Yeah? You like riding my thigh?" He prompted, his hands making me speed up.
I fisted the material of his shirt in my hands as my mouth fell agape with pleasure.
"Riding my thigh like such a good girl." He praised.
"Fuck!" I hung my head back, his words going straight to my core.
He chuckled cockily, "D'you like when I call you that? Huh?"
I nodded, too flustered with these new senses of pleasure to speak.
His hand travelled up into my hair and tugged on it by my roots. A louder moan than I would have liked escaped my lips.
"I asked you a question, answer me." He said sternly.
"Fuck! Yes, I love it when you call me that." I answered pathetically.
"Good girl." He praised, letting go of my hair and rocking my hips on him.
I felt an immense amount of pleasure build up and it felt as if something was going to snap in me.
"Oh shit, I- fuck!" I furrowed my brows in concentration and confusion.
"R'you gonna cum, darling?" He asked, almost shocked.
"I don't- fuck - know!" I moaned, feeling the knot inside my stomach about to snap.
But before that could even happen I was being flipped back onto my back and Tom was ripping off my shorts and panties, diving in between my legs with lust.
His hands held my thighs and brought me closer to him. His lips attached to my clit and sucked, giving me a whole new feeling.
"Oh, fuck! Yes! Yes!" I moaned shamelessly, tugging his hair and fisting the bedsheets.
"Go on, darling. Cum in my mouth for me. Taste so good. Please, love."
The mixture between his words and his nicknames for me and the fact his mouth was working wonders on my core completely sent me over the edge: an experience I had never had before.
"Holy shit! Tom! Yes!" I subconsciously tightened my thighs around his head and my hands practically pushed him completely onto me.
He continued riding me through my high until I unclenched my thigh and he pulled away slowly.
I lay breathless and in a state of shock and euphoria at the same time.
"You okay?" He asked soothingly, rubbing his hand over my bare thigh as he came up to kiss me.
"Yeah I've...I've never-"
"You've never came before?" Tom asked, baffled by me.
"Nope..."
He kept his eyes on me but slipped a hand down to my core again. I bucked my hips against his hand with a gasp as he moved his fingers in circles over my core.
"You've never even touched yourself?" He asked lowly.
I bit my lip and shook my head.
"You're so wet for me, darling, fuck." He cursed.
He suddenly dipped a finger into my core and I moaned. He curled it up and I gripped his arm tightly.
"What d'you want?" He asked.
"I want you, Tom, please." I bit my lip.
He smiled and sat back, his hand coming away from my clit, leaving me feeling empty. He shed his shirt and I finally got to look at his chiselled torso up close. He then slid his shorts and boxers off and my jaw dropped at the sight of him.
He was semi-hard but he was already bigger than my ex. A lot bigger.
He pumped his member in his hand, "You sure about this?"
I stuttered, completely distracted by his actions than his words.
"What? You like the look of it? Hmm? Wanna suck me off?" He asked, his hand cupping my chin and sliding his thumb into my mouth again.
I moaned at his words and nodded.
"You want to suck me off, darling? You sure?" He asked, removing his thumb.
"Yes, fuck Tom, I wanna suck you off." I moaned.
"Good girl." He praised.
We switched positions so he was sitting against the headboard and now I was in between his legs.
"I don't know how to..." I said shakily.
"You're okay," He gathered my hair up in his hands.
"Do whatever feels natural and I'll tell you if it's good, yeah?"
I nodded and gulped, moving my mouth closer to his member. I pumped him in my hand a few times and I could almost feel him harden right there. I had done this part before, at least.
I lowered my mouth onto him, swirling my tongue around his lip. He hissed slightly and gripped my hair tighter. I slowly let my mouth down on him and came back up.
"That's it, good girl." He praised.
I moaned and continued bobbing my head slowly on him, finding a rhythm. I held his thigh for support as I got faster, easing into it.
"Fuck, darling, feels so good." He groaned.
The taste of him in my mouth was amazing, pre cum already escaping onto my tongue.
I slackened my jaw and took as much of him as I could then pumped the rest in my hand.
"Holy shit! Fuck!" He held my head there and thrusted up.
His member hit the back of my throat but I didn't mind it at all. He made sure I was okay then did it again. And again. And again. Until he was continuously throat fucking me. I enjoyed it, surprisingly. The obscene sounds my mouth was making was not only making Tom more aroused, but also me.
I felt some drool drip down from my mouth onto my chin and even onto his lower stomach but I didn't care.
"Fuck, love those pretty little sounds coming from your throat, baby." He groaned.
I moaned, my eyes rolling to the back of my head.
"Such a good girl."
But then he pulled me off of him. I looked at him in confusion but he flipped me onto my back sooner than I could say anything.
"Need to be in you before I cum, princess." He said, kissing me deeply, his tongue exploring my mouth.
"Ready?" He asked.
I felt his tip brush up and down my folds. I gripped his arms and nodded, closing my eyes to concentrate.
"Hey, look at me." He said.
I looked up into his gorgeous chocolate eyes.
"Breathe in," He instructed.
I did as he said.
"And out."
As I breathed out, he pushed into me slowly.
I moaned and arched my back at the feeling of him inside of me. His technique worked.
"You okay?" He asked caringly.
I nodded, biting my lip.
"You can move."
He started thrusting slowly in and out of me, my arousal making it a lot easier for him to move.
"So fuckin' tight, darling." He cursed.
I wrapped my thighs around his waist and he bottomed me out.
"Yes!" I moaned, my back arching so our chests were touching.
"Does that feel good?" He asked.
I hummed, "Faster, please."
He smirked, "As you wish."
His thrusts got gradually faster and my mouth hung open in a silent moan. He brushed past my g-spot with every movement and I scraped his back with my finger nails.
"So fucking good," I gasped.
He sped his thrusts completely and his head fell into the crook of my neck, leaving sloppy kisses on my skin.
"So big! Yes!" I moaned pornographically as he perfectly met my g-spot.
He reached a hand down and started rubbing my clit in skilful circles. I screamed out in overwhelming pleasure as I felt the now familiar feeling come back in my stomach.
"So good for me, darling. Been such a good girl. You gonna cum?" Tom whispered his praises into my ear.
"So close! Oh my god!" I curled my toes and dug my fingernails into his back.
"Come on darling. Feel so good around my cock. Feel so fucking good. You're a fucking angel, y/n. Fuck." He moaned.
I rolled my eyes back at his words. God his words.
"I'm gonna cum!" I squealed, eyes squeezing shut.
"Look at me when you cum, love."
I could hardly hear his voice anymore as I felt my second high approaching.
"I said-"
I gasped as I felt his hand around my throat, pressing the sides of my neck, activating some unknown pleasure button.
"Look at me when you cum all over my fucking cock." He grunted, his dark, dilated eyes staring into mine.
I kept my eyes on him as my high began to wash over me. His thrusts kept the same pace but his fingers moved faster, spurring my orgasm along.
"Yes! Fuck, feels so- yes!" I moaned.
I was extremely loud, I'm surprised the police hadn't come knocking asking about it.
My high seemed to be everlasting. Tom began to pull out but I kept my legs wrapped around him.
"Want you to cum in me, Tom. Please." I begged.
"You sure?" He asked, holding his orgasm back.
"Yes! Please! Need your cum in me." I moaned seductively against his lips.
"Fuck- so good for me- yes!"
I felt as he stilled in me, and as his cum painted my walls. His face contorted in levels of pleasure as he finished and I was finally coming down from my own high.
He pulled out after a second and collapsed next to me.
We both lay together, not saying a word, just listening to each other's breathing calm.
After a minute or two, he turned to face me.
"That- was so fucking good." He laughed.
"It was." I smiled back.
He reached a hand over to my face and brushed my hair behind my ear. I softened into his touch and hummed.
But that bliss was broken quickly.
"Hello?! We're home!"
I gasped, shooting up on my bed.
"Is that your mum?!" Tom whisper shouted.
"Yes! You need to go like now!" I whispered back.
He scurried off the bed and into his boxers and clothes, shakily putting on his shirt and attempting to put his shoes on quickly but leaving them untied.
I grabbed his backpack and handed it to him.
"Thank you," He smiled, taking it from me and heading for the window again.
He swung a leg out but then hesitated.
"Oh and uh-"
He held his hand out.
"I'm Tom, by the way." He grinned.
I smiled, shaking his hand.
"I'm y/n. Nice to meet you, neighbour."
"Nice to meet you, too." He winked, before climbing out the window, down the wall and back into his own house.
Nice to meet you indeed.
-
A/N: this is written for my amazing friend Caitlin and it's her birthday today! and she gave me all the details for this piece so i hope you guys enjoyed!
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yayeetsonny · 3 years
Text
Always Tell The Truth Part 2 ~ USWNT x Reader
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Okay so if you haven’t read the first part of this, which I will put here. Always tell the truth part 1 I suggest you do that, otherwise this one will make no sense. Also sorry... again for being gone so long. I hope you guys didn’t miss me too much. :)
-N
Previously...
“Those bruises, Y/N, where’d you get them?” 
“I. Don’t. Know.”
“I don’t believe you.”
“Fine then, don’t believe me. First Alex, then Christen and now you. This is just great, my teammates think I’m a liar. Well I’m not and I’m telling you the truth.”
I brushed by her and stormed out of the room, now determined to avoid my teammates so they’d stop asking questions and questioning my honesty.
“I’m not a liar. I don’t know where I got the bruises, I don’t know why they won’t believe me.”
Present
After I stormed out of the room I share with Ali I ran... yes literally ran out of the hotel and out into the street. Well okay it was more like the sidewalk but whatever, I’m going for dramatic story telling here. I was angry, hurt and confused as to why my teammates couldn’t just believe me. I’ve never lied to them before, not ever. If something was going on I would have told them. And I genuinely have no clue where these bruises came from, I don’t remember hurting myself badly in practices or games and I don’t do any other crazy activities that would warrant the sudden appearance of severe looking injuries. I knew I just needed to clear my head so I started walking in a random direction hoping to get my thoughts together.
After a while I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket and knew it was probably one of my teammates looking for me so I ignored it. My phone stopped ringing only for a short time before it stared up again. This went on for several long minutes before it finally stopped. After each attempt from whoever was trying reach me there was a separate single vibrate indicating they left a message. I felt a little guilty for disappearing and probably worrying everyone but they shouldn’t have assumed or accused me of lying. Thinking they finally got the message that I didn’t want to speak to them I continued walking god knows where trying to think of what to say when I finally decided to go back. I was really deep in thought, trying to remember if and when I got the bruises. Obviously they don’t just appear like magic. They have to be caused by something, but... what? All the sudden I was hit with a vague memory
“Huh?... Wha- where am I?”
“You fell asleep on the couch dear. Don’t you remember? It was really adorable actually. My mom said super sweetly.
That’s weird, she’s never overly sweet with me, like ever.
“No, I don’t remember doing that.”
I looked around and the tv was on, which is also rare. It was playing a random comedy movie. Comedy? My parents don’t even like comedy movies.
“Oh well you did. Right after dinner, you dragged your feet over to the couch and was out like a light before we knew it.” She said casually.
My dad waltzed in like everything was totally normal. What the fuck is going on. Why don’t I even remember eating dinner? How long have I been here? Why does my body hurt so much?
I came back to the present feeling slightly uneasy. I remembered now a little bit of what happened when I got to my parents house and a little bit of what happened after I woke up from my nap. They managed to convince me everything was fine after that and I left assuming they were telling me the truth because I was too tired and too annoyed to argue. But the more I thought about it the more I wondered just how much of what they said is true. Why were there huge gaps in my time with them? And why do I get the feeling that the weird gut feeling I have isn’t a coincidence? I got lost in thought again but it was peaceful this time and quiet which I was relishing in.
Unfortunately the peace and quiet only lasted for a few minutes when I started to get what I assumed were dozens of texts. I finally got fed up and decided to silence my phone completely. When I unlocked it I saw a glimpse of some of the worried texts from the team. They all pretty much said the same thing;
“Y/N please come back. I’m sorry for saying I didn’t believe you. I’m just concerned about you. I want to talk and I’ll listen to whatever you have to say. Just please come back.”- Ali
“Hey kid, heard what happened. Wanna talk?”- T
“Y/n where are you? I heard what happened and that you left?? please come back, we’re worried.”- Christen
“Bruh what the hell? let’s talk?”- Ash
“where r u?”- Mal
“It’s not safe for you to be out by yourself. Ali told us about the other bruises. Whatever this is we’ll help you. We’re gonna start searching for you if you don’t get your ass back here soon. We love you.”- Alex
And it went on like that as every single member of the team texted me some variation of that and the voicemails they all left were much the same. I started to feel more guilty but let my anger keep me from replying to them. They can stew a little longer.
Meanwhile back at the Hotel...
CHRISTEN PRO//
“Okay, so tell us exactly what happened.”
“I saw the bruises when she was changing, which I happened to walk in on. I don’t think she was expecting me. I asked her what happened and she said that nothing had happened and I asked her about the bruises I saw on her arm, shoulder and spine and she continued to tell me she has no idea where they came from. I told her I didn’t believe her and then she got upset and she just... left.”
“Just like that? She didn’t say where she was going?”
“No, she was so angry she just stormed out and when I tried to follow after her she was already gone.”
“And she’s still not answering her phone. Damnit kid come on, where are you?”
“She’s not safe out there on her own, we have to go look for her.”
“And how are we supposed to find her when she doesn’t have her location on and is doing everything she can’t to ignore us?”
“I have no idea but we have to try.”
“We will, but we should give her a little more time. It’s possible she’s just around the corner cooling off. She’ll come back when she’s ready.”
“You’re right.”
“Guys I hate to steer us back into more serious topics but shouldn’t we be talking about the bruises she has that started all of this?”
“What do you guys think they’re from?” Megan asked.
“I want to believe her when she says she doesn’t know but I mean how can you just not know about bruises as severe as those?” Ash said.
“I mean... I’ve had some pretty bad ones I don’t remember getting from anywhere.” Mal said off-handily.
I saw some of the rest of the team nod silently, indicating that they too had, had the same thing happen to them. And I had to admit that I had my fair share of bumps and bruises that I couldn’t explain because they just seemed to appear but I was still concerned for our youngest teammate as it was getting pretty late and it was already dark outside.
“Oh god, you don’t think it’s her parents do you?” Tobin asked no one in particular.
We all paused for a moment to process what she was implying and I know we were silently hoping, praying that they wouldn’t do that to her. That they wouldn’t beat their own child.
“No, there’s no way. She’s told us that they love and support her and that even though they aren’t around much they still care about her.”
“Right, you’re right.”
“It has to be them though, I mean there’s no other explanation. She didn’t have them before or after practice right?” Alex asked.
“No, she didn’t.” Lindsey said solemnly.
“Do you really think parents can just flip a switch? Just like that? Be caring and supportive one minute and violent then next?”
“It’s possible.”
“No, just don’t even go there. I refuse to believe they would do that.”
“We would have seen the bruises if she had them before, since we all change in the same locker room together for practices and games remember?” I said
“Fuck. When I get my hands on them I swear to god...”
She didn’t get to finish her sentence because Y/n walked into the dining hall where we were all gathered.
“Get your hands on who?” She asked quietly
“Kid...”
“Y/n holy shit, thank god.”
“And she lives!... not the time? Got it.”
“Y/N... we need to talk.”
“Why? There’s nothing to talk about. I don’t know what Ali told you, but I don’t know where these fucking bruises came from okay? I don’t know. I’m sorry, I know that probably isn’t what you wanted to hear but it’s the truth. If you don’t believe me that’s fine but i’m not talking about it anymore.”
“Sweetie please just hear us out okay? We’re worried about you and getting defensive about them isn’t helping your case.” I said, trying to reach out for her but she backed away from me.
“Defensive? I’m just upset because you all still don’t seem to get it.”
“We want to get it, please just talk to us.”
“No.”
“Y/N, please just...”
“No! Okay, just no. I said we weren’t talking about it again and that’s final. What happened to “I’ll listen to whatever you have to say.” Huh, Ali? Good to know that was complete bullshit.”
“I’m sorry baby, please believe me, we just...”
“Oh believe you? For what? You clearly still don’t believe me so why should I give you that courtesy? You know what, this is all just fucking stupid anyways. I’m going to bed. Goodnight.”
And with that she disappeared up to the room she’s sharing with Ali. Leaving us all more confused and concerned than ever.
“Well... that went well.”
“Shut up Emily, so not the time.”
//End
Okay so yes that is yet another cliffhanger of sorts, I’m sorry but I thought that was a good place to end it. Just know that Y/N genuinely doesn’t remember a lot of what’s going on, just like she says. Her parents are definitely sus asf.
I’m actually writing part 3 rn so that should be up within the next day or so. I know I keep disappearing but my life is totally a mess rn lol. I’m back now tho and am excited to finally get to all the requests I have. Im so sorry for those waiting I haven’t forgotten. Promise.
-N
//
Not edited.
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goldengoddess · 3 years
Note
soooo the idea is a fic set during king of scars where the reader is nikolai's childhood best first and we stumble into his room one evening and we actually see him change into the demon and just absjajnsns
i am yours - nikolai lantsov
* KING OF SCARS & RULE OF WOLVES SPOILERS *
pairing: nikolai lantsov x reader
a/n: okay this is absolutely garbage rae i am so sorry pls forgive me,,, i KNOW this is not how nikolai’s demon works and he wouldn’t just like turn back but for the sake of this fic pls pretend <33333
for the lovley @wtfrae !!! i love u pls go read her work everyone <3
warnings: spoilers! some angst n like threat of violence but y’all know me, everything is good and happy by the end
nikolai had always been the one person you could turn to. since the two of you were kids, it had always been an unbreakable bond. something no one else seemed to understand. how to kids, tossed aside by their family, tested in every way possible, were able to find each other and bring out the best in one another. nikolai made you better, made you good.
life in ravka was never easy, it was a constant struggle. especially in the years leading up to nikolai’s reign. the two of you almost hadn’t made it out alive then, and while nikolai had been out fighting with alina in the fold, you had stayed at the spinning wheel helping the injured.
but when things finally settled down, alina and mal safe and away, nikolai had told you so many stories. the two of you had spent months apart. so out of nostalgia, every night you’d sneak into nikolai’s room and listen to your best friend tell you stories about everything. all the battles he’d fought along as sturmhond, what the battle against the darkling had looked like.
and even when nikolai ran out of stories, and you ran out of questions, you kept sneaking into his room to talk to him. he was the king of ravka, during the day he never even stopped to take a breath. but his nights were reserved for you. just so he could hear the sound of your voice before he was bound to his bed by chains.
nikolai loved you dearly, you were the only constant he had ever known. but he couldn’t bring himself to share what had happened to him during the battle with the darkling, what he’d become. instead, he told you the stories he told everyone else, how he was captured and tortured. it hurt him, to lie to you. but he couldn’t have you seeing him the way he saw himself, a monster. so even though lying to you pained him every night, he would do it to hear your excited questions and giggles as you snuck out of his room.
he always made sure you were gone before zoya came in. he wouldn’t be able to explain the drugging potion. or even worse, his horrible transformation into the demon that lived inside of him.
but secrets almost never stay secrets.
“saints nikolai,” you gasped, rushing off his bed to grab grab your coat, “it’s past midnight. i can’t be in here!”
nikolai sat up and looked out his window, you watched the color drain from his face. he cleared his throat and walked over to you, “you’re right you should probably go.”
you nodded and shuffled away from him, but before opening the door you paused. you turned back to the blonde haired boy, “nikolai?”
“yes sweetheart?” he answered, facing you.
“i could,” you hesitated, “i could sleep over. one night, i’m not saying tonight. just some night. i’ll sleep on the floor but, i spend all of my night here anyways. just like when we were kids.”
as nikolai slowly walked closer to you, you waited for his teasing remark and eventual acceptance. the two of you w had a sleepover since before he left ravka. of course it wouldn’t be the same, as he was now king, but he was your nikolai.
instead, he gently tucked a piece of your hair and kissed your forehead. “i don’t think that’s such a good idea sweetheart.”
your heart shattered at his words and his at the fact that he had to say them. there was nothing he wanted more. nothing that would bring him more peace than holding you in his arms until the sunrise. not just for a couple of hours right before bed, not having to pretend that everything he felt for you was strictly platonic.
“oh” you said defeatedly. “that, yeah that’s okay. i’ll see you tomorrow nikolai.” and with that you rushed out of the room.
later, as zoya gave nikolai genya and david’s potion to knock him out, all he could think about was the horrible look on your face.
at some point in the night you’d made the decision to go talk to nikolai. the two of you couldn’t go on like this, attempting to be way you have been before the darkling and alina while tip toeing around these new feelings you had for eachother.
but as you made your way to nikolai’s doors, hand on the doorknob, you heard a soft growl coming from inside. you covered your mouth with your hand to prevent a gasp from escaping your lips. you slowly turned the handle and stepped into the room.
on nikolai’s kingly bed was a dark giant looking demon. it’s wings were the color of the night sky seen in the window of the bed room. it took your breath away.
you pressed your back against the wall, trying to move back towards the door without making any noise. but the demon heard you and snapped it’s head in your direction.
every part of your body was screaming to run, to scream even. but something stopped you. the eyes. they stopped you. they were dark and pitch black but there was something familiar about them. not the color but the way they watched you. like they were trying to remember every single part of you just in case.
nikolai was the only person who you knew looked at you that way.
“nikolai?” you whispered to the monster.
the creature craned its neck to the side, similar to the confused head tilts that nikolai used to give you during lessons. you took a hesitant step forward, holding your hands up to show that you weren’t going to cause harm.
“nikolai” you tried again, with more conviction in your voice.
the creature let out a small growl as a response and you flinched away. at your movement it out a whine and moved away from you.
you shuffled closer, “hey no no i’m okay. nikolai?”
slowly, as you repeated your best friends name over and over, the creature became less beast and more man. slowly morphing into a messy set of blonde curls and body you’d hugged more times than you can recall. your nikolai.
he curled up in a ball and leaned his back against the end of his bed.
“nikolai” you attempted softly, falling to your knees in front of him.
he scrambled away to a corner of the room, “please. please leave. i’m begging.” his voice was raspy from misuse, thought the two of you had spoken only hours before.
“nikolai i’m not leaving, please explain to me. what was that?” you pleaded with him.
“that was nothing, now go. please please” he sobbed into his hands.
you crossed your arms over your chest in a stubborn gesture that he couldn’t even see, “you’re lying to me again! i’m not leaving until you explain what that was. why can’t you tell me the truth for once?”
“that was me!” he yelled as he lifted his head and met your eyes for the first time.
you let out a sigh of relief at the familiar hazel color of his eyes. you crossed your legs together, “that was you?”
“yes that was me. that is what the darkling did to me. now please,” he let out an exhausted sob “please leave sweetheart.”
you felt tears swelling in your own eyes at his voice. how broken he sounded. your nikolai never sounded so defeated. and if he ever felt that way, he had never shown you. you crawled over to him slowly and placed your hands on the sides of his face, rubbing away the tears.
“what are you doing” he whimpered and dropped his head into your hands, “i could hurt you. sweetheart, you have to go.”
“my nikolai” you whispered, pushing his damp hair away from his forehead.
he closed his eyes and you couldn’t tell if it was from anger, exhaustion, sadness, or a mix of all of it. “i cannot be yours. i’ve lied to you, i’m a demon, a monster. you can’t possibly want me to be yours.” he spit each word about himself as if it were venom, like the words ripped away a little bit of his humanity, or his confidence.
you shook your head and softly placed your forehead again his, still holding the sides of his face. “no. you’re my nikolai. you always will be.”
you placed two soft kisses on his cheeks, one on each side. “my” kiss, “nikolai,” another kiss.
“oh sweetheart, i am yours” he sighed and opened up his knees so you could fall into his embrace. “i am so sorry.”
“you should be” you mumbled into his chest. “what if you had died nikolai? and i wouldn’t have known what was happening to you until it was too late. i could have helped.”
he kissed the top of your head, still hesitantly. “im a fool, you can spend the rest of my life reminding me. i didn’t want to ruin this, us. it’s the last precious thing i have in my life.”
“we are still precious” you whispered and clung to his shirt like your life depended on it. “the same way you are still the nikolai i have always known, since childhood. you are still good. we will fix this.”
“and if we can’t?” he asked so softly that you almost couldn’t hear him.
“then i’ll have to get just as familiar with the demon as i am with you” you joked.
and the rumble of nikolai’s laughing chest told you that everything would be perfectly fine. demon and all, he was still your nikolai.
taglist;
@deardiarystuff @bookishcrows @kazsimp @vintagebitc @obiwansjedi @thegirlwiththeimpala @hybrid-in-progress @mrs-brekker15 @mrsbrekkers @simplyluvzuko @ode-to-joy @gallysonegoodlung @sixofshadowandbone @castielcouldbeasecretdentist @meiitanoia @caaarstairs @itisroe
if your name is in bold, it means i couldn’t tag you <3
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beauty-and-passion · 3 years
Note
Silly fun challenge prompt: what languages do you associate with the Sides/what would be the 2nd language each Side learn?
For example I am a big fan of Hispanic (Spanish speaking) Creativitwins fanon. And c! Thomas too could've learnt Spanish in high school and the fact his love interest is hispanic too just makes perfect sense-
And in contrast to Hispanic twins I headcanon Janus as a francophone (French speaking) for two reasons: 1) it was still lingua franca around Victorian era, his aesthetic inspiration and 2) dividing American high school by Spanish class vs. French class is like causing Civil War (I was and still am a language nerd, so I learnt both languages, which was a mistake but the kind of mistake that was worth it when you think about it later)
German suites Logan since lots of famous philosophers are German. I associate Japanese or Korean with Virgil since those two are really dominant in the current subculture world (and maybe our emo could've been inspired and turn into E-boy - wow that sounds terrifying)
I don't have strong preference on Patton's but Italian sounds nice, since all those music and dessert and anything sweet are often from Italy. And maybe 'Orange' can be some language that sounds harsh like Russian, so he can murmur in that in sleep and scares everyone else
I know you're in Europe: 1) you use GMT and 2) Americans wouldn't care about Eurovision. So I wonder how you would think based on your European experience!
Oooh, I like this! As European Who Studied Languages, I definitely approve this and I'll gladly add my two cents about which languages the sides should learn.
_________
Roman: He canonically knows Spanish and that's perfect like that. Spanish is a romantic language, someone speaks Spanish and you can't help but swoon. It’s a great choice for the Side responsible for romance and passion.
_________
Remus: Remus isn't just intrusive thoughts, but there’s a very high chance he’s also responsible for Thomas' sexual urges. So, what is the language made for sex? You’re right, it’s French. French is sexy. You can say anything in French and bam, ✨sexy ✨.
"Je sors la poubelle." Sexy, isn't it? Well, I just said "I'm taking out the trash". See? Very sexy.
(French people, please confirm my words. We all know it’s true)
_________
Janus: Your points are incredibly valid and I love them. But if we should choose among all languages, I would love Janus to be one of the very few (extremely few) people in the world who can speak Latin.
I know Latin is a dead language, but it would be great - and not just because of the connection with his name.
Let’s consider that the other Romance languages, despite evolving from Latin, cannot entirely understand it, because they all changed a lot through the centuries after mixing with the Germanic ones. On the other hand, the Germanic languages (English, German, Swedish and so on) are part of a completely different group, only slightly influenced by Latin, so they cannot understand it.
In other words, Janus would speak a language that only sounds familiar - and maybe you can grasp a couple words here and there if you know a romance language, but the true meaning is hidden. What is he actually saying? Who knows. Is he actually cursing someone? Who knows. After all, do you understand Latin? Yeah, me neither.
If I have to pick a language that is still spoken today instead, I think I'll join you with French. Your points are valid and French is a very elegant language, fitting for Janus’ whole aesthetic. So yes, French could work.
_________
Logan: German is a great choice and you are absolutely right with your point about the philosophers. Also German is a language of harsh sounds and strict grammar rules - for example:
declensions that should be used accordingly for articles, adjectives and nouns
specific verbs for specific meanings
words made by putting together shorter words (like Haustürschlüssel.  Haustür means “front door”, Schlüssel means “key” -> this word means “front door’s key”)
sentences that should follow a specific construction, with parts of the compound verb after the noun and part at the end of the sentence. And secondary phrases also have a specific syntax and should always be introduced by a comma
In other words, it's a very organized language and I think it would fit Logan.
But also, considering that almost all words related to science and philosophy come from Greek, I think Logan should at least understand some Greek. As a treat.
(Also because Greek is another incredibly complicated language, so if someone has the patience to learn it, it’s definitely Logan.)
_________
Virgil: oh my gosh, I never thought about an eastern language for Virgil. In a way, it would be a very peculiar choice and I kinda like it. Japanese and Korean are extremely complicated languages, they have a very specific alphabet (I'm especially thinking about the Japanese one, that even asks for a specific direction to write words) and require a lot of work (and memory) to learn them.
But Virgil is also a poet and when I think of poets and sonnets my first connection is with the french ennui, le mal du vivre and especially Baudelaire and his works. Virgil would appreciate Baudelaire a lot. So French, again.
But hey, there’s too much French now. So I’ll pick the other european literature full of sadness: the russian one.
Russian is supposed to be a big scary language and its alphabet is weird and omg what if they're cursing us? But if you learn it a little bit, you’ll find out that Russian has a lot of soft/open sounds (due to a good use of vowels) and it's very poetic.
So the language itself is a bit like Virgil: he seems scary and evil at a first glance, but if you learn about him, he's actually kinder than he looks.
But never underestimate Russian, because just like Anxiety, fear is just behind the corner: you start learning it and wow, there is just one present tense, one past tense and one future tense? This is great, what a wonderful language!
And then, before you’ll realize it, you will find out that each verb has a “doppelganger” used for entirely different purposes AND there a gazillion verbs of motion and you will end up crying on the floor, because there are just too many verbs - and look, there are also one trillion particles you can put before these verbs and they give them EVEN MORE MEANINGS.
No, this isn't entirely based on my personal experience, what makes you think that.
_________
Patton: I have never thought about Patton learning another language, because English just fits him too well.
But when you proposed Italian... well, my heart just wiped out everything else. There is nothing here, only Patton speaking Italian.
So yes, Patton's second language should be Italian. No, it must be Italian. Because French is the language of sex, Spanish is the language of love, but if you want to declare your eternal love to someone, you use Italian. Do you want to marry someone? Italian. Do you want to tell your significant other how much you adore them? Italian. Italian has one million ways to express love and Patton should use them all with his kiddos.
And yes, Italian is also associated with warm people, warm places and good food, all things Patton deserves and should enjoy. So Italian is a big yes.
_________
Orange: since Orange is a mystery, I am a bit torn between these two languages:
1) Esperanto: This language is amazing, because it isn’t a natural language, born like all others, but it has been built by a man, who wanted to create an universal language in order to foster world peace and international understanding.
So this language has been created to be as simple as possible, with a very regular grammar (unlike all other natural languages) and its words all have references to other language groups (romance, germanic, slavic, indo-europeans, finno-ugric languages and so on).
And if you actually listen to it (especially if you know some latin languages) you will find it weirdly understandable. I found this video in particular and I was impressed by how strangely familiar esperanto sounds.
And... that’s it, I just think it would be kinda poetic that the last side knows a language that all others can use and understand.
2) A Greenlandic language. Why? Because they are insanely polysynthetic.
What does that mean? If in German you can make words by putting together other two/three words (like in the example I used before), in the Greenlandic languages you can build an entire sentence by putting together nouns, verbs, articles and everything else. All together in one single word, whose meaning can be translated with an entire sentence in another language.
Do you want an example? Here is an example from Wikipedia: tuntussuqatarniksaitengqiggtuq.
Yes, this is a word.
This word is from the Yupik language and means "He had not yet said again that he was going to hunt reindeer.". And this word is made of:
tuntu- (= reindeer)
ssur-  (= hunt)
qatar- (future tense)
ni- (= say)
ksaite- (negative)
ngqiggte- (= again)
uq  (3rd.sing.IND)
Is this insane? This is fucking insane. Do you want to be scared? This is real fear. What the heck. How. Why.
You know what? This is perfect for Orange, I’ll leave Esperanto to Thomas. Orange deserves to be this scary. I can already see the other sides quiver before him.
_________
And so, here are my guesses! If someone has other ideas, feel free to add yours and tell us why, so we can all have a nice discussion :D
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straykeedz · 7 months
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day 20: hyunjin + consensual somnophilia
©straykeedz
tw: female anatomy; sexting; oral (f receiving); unprotected piv sex (don’t do this at home 🤨); creampie; hints as reader returning the favor; ♡
wc: 2,1k;
this is part of my kinktober masterlist. you can find my regular masterlist here (tho it will not be updated until the end of kinktober) ♡
🔖 (open): @linos-kitten ; @luneskies ; @kxcies-blog ; @idunnomanmynamewastaken ; @cessixja ; @stolasisyourparent ; @kookiesbunny ; @xoxo-xoxo-bunny ; @ivyskzsworld ; @mal-lunar-28 ; @leetaste ; @sunnykynnie ; @channiesgoodgirl ; @seonghwatoothless ; @mrsminho ; @seungminluv3 ; @jin-from-the-block ; @aaasia111 ; @sulkygyu ; @whosanaanyway ; @y-ur--I ; @vixensss ; @nightimescapes ; @freckleboilix ; @dreamingaboutjisung ; @yourbeomiebear ; ♡
to make sure i add you to the taglist, your age must be clearly visible on your profile. also, empty blogs will not be added - add at least a profile picture to your blog so that i’ll know you’re not a bot. ♡
smut below the cut, minors dni
Hyunjin loves sleeping with you. 
No, not in a sexual way. Well, also in a sexual way, but he truly does love to just sleep next to you, snuggle closer to your warm body and intertwine your legs with his to keep him warm through the night - it doesn’t matter if there’s a million degrees outside or if it’s freezing cold, the man just wants to sleep wrapped around you. There’s nothing he craves more after a long day than to lie down on the bed next to you, inhale the delicate scent of your shampoo and shower gel as he wraps his limbs around your figure, not wanting to let go of you. And you don’t want him to let go of you either - so you get comfortable in his embrace, pushing your body closer to his as you fall asleep lulled by the sound of his heartbeat. 
Hyunjin sleeps the best when he has you next to him. Whenever he leaves for tours or promotions or fashion shows and has to sleep alone in those cold, empty beds of the hotel he stays in, he never gets a good sleep. He would wake up the following morning with two big, dark circles under his eyes that even the best concealer in the world would have trouble hiding. The first thing he’d do once he’s finally back home is spend an entire day next to you in bed, holding you in his arms as he finally gets his well-deserved rest. 
But of course he also love sleeping with you. Sex with you is out of this world and his favorite way to show you how much he loves you, because sometimes words are not enough and paintings take too long to make - he needs to let you know how he feels about you effective immediately.  This doesn’t mean that your intimate sessions are always lovemaking sessions - sometimes, it’s just pure, raw, animalistic fucking each other’s brains out until you both forget your names. 
Unfortunately, due to his insanely busy schedule, Hyunjin hasn’t been able to do neither. He can’t even remember the last time you fell asleep next to each other, and he hates it. Sure, he still gets to sleep next to you and hold you through the night, but it’s not the same. And he knows you miss him too, that you miss the intimacy you two used to share before falling asleep in each other’s arms. 
He misses your lips, your arms, your hands on his skin, the way your legs wrap around his hips as he fucks you, he misses you so bad it hurts. 
His phone buzzes in his pocket, distracting him from his thoughts. He smiles when he sees it’s a text from you. 
you: miss u :(
you: wish you were here with me… 
you: want u so bad
Hyunjin sighs, because he knows today’s a busy day at the studio and he won’t be able to leave anytime soon. Before he can type his reply, however, his phone buzzes again. Two attachments, two pictures. He wastes no time in downloading them, thinking you might’ve sent him memes or something, but he nearly drops his phone as soon as he clicks on the first one. 
He blinks a couple of time as he stares at the screen of his phone. It’s a mirror selfie, but you’re not exactly dressed. In fact, you’re completely naked. His breath gets caught in his throat as he swipes to see the next one, a close up of your pussy. How is he supposed to focus now? He still has to be at work for another couple of hours, and those pictures most definitely won’t leave his mind. 
oh, my sweet baby, my sweet jagiya… i wish i was there with you too :( n i miss you too &lt;3 
wish i could touch that pretty pussy, make you come around my fingers…
i’ll probably be home late tonight too, tho :’( u’ll probably be asleep by the time i come home
Hyunjin loves his job, but sometimes he hates it too. 
you: i don’t mind if u don’t 👀
Hyunjin is not sure he understands the implicature behind your text, but his interest is definitely piqued by your curious reply. 
???
you: i wouldn’t mind it if you woke me up with ur cock inside of me or with ur tongue on my 🐱 just sayin 🤷‍♀️
And Hyunjin nearly chokes on his spit, but he’s thankful none of his band members are around. He’s sure even the tips of his ears are red by now, and a bulge is evident in his skinny jeans. Just the thought of waking you up with sex… gosh, it makes his mouth water. 
JAGI!
the boys could’ve read this!!
you: but they didnt 🙊
NOT the point. 
but… are u serious? would u really be okay with it?
you: as i said before
you: i dont mind if u don’t 
you: besides, ive gone too long without ur cock. kinda need it bad :(
-
Hyunjin found it hard to focus on the damn dance practice and recording session, the thought of the pictures you’d sent him and your texts were carved in his mind. All he could think of was coming home to you.
He enters your shared apartment making sure not to be too loud - it’s nearly four in the morning, you’re surely sleeping. As soon as the thought of your sleeping figure, graciously cuddled up under the covers pops up in his head, he remembers your texts, and his cock begins to stir in the confines of his underwear. 
Is he really going to do this? Is he really going to fuck you while you’re asleep? You made it perfectly clear to him that the idea turns you on and that you want him to. Does he wants to? So bad. It sounds so intimate, so desperate… 
He gets rid of his shoes and slowly makes it to your shared bedroom - you’re sleeping so peacefully. You’re on your side, your back facing him, and he can’t wait to climb up on the bed next to you, he missed you so much. He changes into a pair of sweats and a clean t-shirt, before getting under the covers, ready to put his arm over your body and pull you closer. 
When he does, he freezes, realising he’s touching your bare skin. Maybe he’s imagining it, maybe your pajama t-shirt has rolled up. But when he drags his hand upwards, his fingers brush the soft skin of your bare chest and he realizes that you’re not wearing anything. The realization makes him let out a desperate sigh as his length throbs in his boxers. 
He moves his hand downwards, wanting to check if you’re naked down there, too. You are, because the pads of his digits directly meet the soft skin of your pussy, and he sucks in a breath as he lets his fingers brush your sensitive parts, closer and closer to touching your clit. When he does place them directly on it, he feel you squirm and breath heavily in your sleep, but you don’t wake up. Somehow, it turns him on even more. 
He places a soft kiss on your bare shoulder as he begins to circle your clit with his expert fingers, slow and delicate, just how you like it, making sure to get you nice and wet for him. Then, he remembers that it’s been too long since he’s last tasted you - this seems to be just the perfect occasion. So he moves his fingers from your pussy and places his hand on your hip, gently helping you turn your body so that you’re now on your back, still asleep. 
He takes a couple of seconds to admire your sleeping figure, smiling to himself as he caresses your cheek with the back of his knuckles. “You’re so beautiful, jagi…”, he whispers on your lips, before capturing them in a soft kiss. 
His body finds its place between your legs, Hyunjin’s face just a couple of inches away from your naked crotch, ready to taste you after weeks of being deprived by this joy - neither yours nor his fault. Stupid idol schedule, denying him the pleasure of eating his girlfriend out. The first drag of his tongue on your folds is tentative, hesitant. He savors the way your hot, bare pussy feels against his tongue, a feeling he’d missed. 
He laps at your entrance, then gently kisses all the way up to your clit, giving it a single lick and then a kiss. He feels you squirm in your place, and hears you let out a whine, but you’re not awake. He wonders how it feels - is it like a sex dream? More intense? Less? Do you even feel him, touching you, kissing you, licking you? 
He gives your clit a few more kisses, before pulling away slightly, only to push two fingers into his mouth to coat them in his spit to lubricate them, before aligning them at your entrance. A soft whimper leaves your mouth when his digits penetrate you and he latches his mouth on your clit, which makes Hyunjin press his face against the flesh of your cunt as he moves his fingers inside of you. 
He knows you’re getting close when he feels your walls clenching around his fingers, and that encourages him to keep going, so he keeps sucking on your clit while moving inside of you. He feels you squeeze his digits incredibly tight and hears your heavy breath - that’s how he knows you’ve come. 
“Hyunjin…”, your raspy voice calls his name, and at the same time he feels your fingers tugging at his hair. 
He climbs up on the bed, body hovering over yours, and even though it’s dark outside, the pale moonlight provides you enough light to see each other’s features. “Hi, baby.” Hyunjin smiles at you, then places a soft kiss on your mouth, and you can taste yourself on his lips. “Sorry if I woke you up.”, he whispers on your lips. “You can go back to sleep, my sweet baby.”, his fingers caress your hair as he kisses you once more. 
You shake your head as a no. “Mh, no… want you to fuck me.”, you mumble, still a bit sleepy. 
“Are you sure, jagi?”
“Mh-hm.”, you hum. “Miss you.”
Hyunjin knows the feeling - he misses you too. “Okay.”, he nods. 
His fingers reach the waistband of his boxers, pulling them down just enough to free his cock and balls. He aligns the tip of his length to your entrance, coating it in what remains of your orgasm, before he starts to push inside inch by inch, making you gasp. 
He can feel every inch of you deliciously wrapped around him, sucking him in, as you wrap your limbs around his strong figure, burying your face in the crook of his neck as he fucks into you slowly. 
“M-Missed you so much, baby.” Hyunjin grunts, grinding his hips against yours, allowing his cock to sink even deeper inside of you. 
“Missed you too, Jin.”, you whimper. “Needed to feel you this close.”
“I’m sorry baby.”, he continues to thrust inside of you gently, slowly, savoring every moment, every feeling of finally being inside of you. “I’ll make it up to you, I promise.”
“I love you.”, you whimper, your second orgasm already building up in your stomach. Hyunjin can feel it, he feels the way you’re squeezing him, the way your legs start to shake, wrapped around his. 
“N-Not gonna last long, baby. Cum for me.”, he encourages you, snapping his hips just a little bit faster, enough to send you over the edge. You cum for the second time, this time around him, clenching around his length, which has him reaching his high almost immediately. “F-Fuck, baby, I’m… cumming.”, he whimpers as he feels your walls practically milking him dry. 
His body collapses on yours, and you run your fingers through his hair as he catches his breath, still panting heavily. Then, he pulls out of you and quickly runs to grab you a wet towel to place between your legs, before lying down next to you, enveloping you in a tight hug, your back against his chest. 
“Did you… did you like it?”, he clears his throat. “I mean, when you- when you were asleep?”, he clarifies. 
You hum. “Very much.”, he can’t see you, but he just knows you’re smiling. 
“How… how does it feel?”
You turn your face to look at him, a mischievous smirk on your face. “Wouldn’t you rather find out for yourself?”
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iliumheightnights · 4 years
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Bird Set Free | Ben Florian x Male Reader
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Fandom: Descendants Pairing: Ben Florian x Male Reader Summary: A jealous Audrey comes after Ben’s boyfriend.
A/N: Another co write with my amazingly talented friend @inhumanshadows​. If you haven’t checked them out what are you waiting for!? …
Ben had caught your eye the moment you stepped out of the limbo from the isle.
You were one of the first vk's to arrive in Auradon.
At the time Ben was dating Audrey so you didn't think you had any chance.
That changed after the big turney game when he asked you privately if you wanted to go on a date with him.
That shocked you first off because he was a prince/future king and you were a villain kid.
Secondly you were a guy. You hadn't expected Ben to be into guys.
You said yes of course. Who wouldn't want to go on a date with Ben.
The date went great and you enjoyed it.
During the whole coronation debacle, you helped Mal and them stop Maleficent.
Once everyone was unfrozen, Ben pulled you into a kiss in front of everyone.
That was a surprise to everyone, but who was going to challenge the king and his boyfriend who just stopped maleficent? No one that's who.
While Adam was shocked he wasn't disappointed and Belle was really supportive of you two.
Ben's parents were your biggest supporters. "Love is love."
While the kingdom had accepted you two relatively easy, one person did not. Audrey.
You had a feeling Audrey wouldn’t like it. 
But you figured she wouldn’t be too mad for long.
At least that’s how it seemed. Especially when she left school for a little “wellness retreat.”
Then the mess with Uma happened. 
You knew she spelled Ben and that any actions he made weren’t consciously his own.
The entire cotillion was...intense.
You didn't let Uma use Ben any more than she had.
You quickly pulled Ben in for a kiss and pressed your lips to his.
There was a spark and energy there that you felt every time you kissed.
Pulling back, Ben smiled at you and you could tell it had worked. He wasn't spelled anymore.
Uma and Mal then got into a fight over her spell book.
After everything settled down the two of you enjoyed the rest of your night.
However there was still a part of you that was hurt seeing Ben with someone else even if it wasn't his doing.
Luckily, Ben quickly made sure that YOU were the one for him.
That led to him proposing to you with a promise ring a week later.
...
You said yes to that right away. No way were you letting that pass by you.
Of course, Audrey wasn't happy with that. But who cares, what could she do?
-You didn’t care. You were engaged and had much more pressing matters to attend to.
-Now the whole kingdom was just in your face about really anything and everything.
“when’s the wedding?!”
“How are you adjusting to life as the prince’s boyfriend??”
It was that constantly and it gets old quickly.
So you just focused on Ben and your friends. 
Evie insisted on designing yours and Ben’s wedding outfits. 
“I mean I won’t tell you no Evie.”
You had to remind everyone that it was only a promise ring and not an actual engagement ring. No one seemed to care.
Honestly with you two, it really was more of an engagement ring.
But that was for another day. Today was Jane's birthday.
Ben had some last minute work to finish so you went ahead of him.
"(M/N)! It's good to see you."
"Ben's on his way. He just had to finish something first. He's sorry for being late."
She waved you off. "No worries."
Then someone you hadn't expected showed up.
Audrey.
She was dressed differently and had maleficent staff.
That wasn't good.
Audrey laid her eyes on you and a wicked smile came over her face.
That REALLY wasn't good.
"Jane, go. Run!"
Jane nods and hightails it out of there.
Audrey starts to sing “Happy birthday” as waves of green smoke wash over the party area, all the guests falling into a cursed sleep.
You brace for an inevitable sleep... but it never comes.
Audrey stands before you, smile on her face.
“A sleeping curse is too good and too easy for you. I have other plans.”
She bangs the bottom of the staff on the ground and you’re surrounded by smoke.
Magic flows over you and when it clears... everything is bigger.
“Well aren’t you a pretty bird...” Audrey says before vanishing. 
You run to the edge of the lake and see that she turned you into a raven.
A raven. Of course she turned you into a raven, just like diaval.
Your first instinct is to panic. You're currently a bird when just five seconds ago you were human.
After calming down a bit you realize the next best thing to do is go after Ben.
Ben! If this is what Audrey did to you what would she have done to Ben!?
Without another thought you flap your new wings and try your best to fly.
It's not pretty at first but you figure it out and soon are flying to your future husband.
When you do reach Ben...it's not fun.
Audrey had changed him as well, but instead of a bird he was a beast. Just like his dad.
When you tried talking with him you hoped he would be like how his dad was as a beast...or at least as you had been told.
You figured you'd get to talk with him and figure out a way to stop Audrey.
Ben tried to eat you.
Apparently Audrey's curse made Ben an actual full beast and not just looking like one.
There was only one thing left to do...find help!
Finding help wasn't easy. Everyone was either asleep or turned to stone!
Fairy godmother? Stone. Belle and Adam? Asleep.
Luckily you found Mal and them, along with Uma, Gil and Harry.
Unluckily, they just thought you were a raven.
Harry kept shooing you and threatening to hit you with the hook.
Gil wanted to pet you. So that wasn’t too bad.
And the others either thought you were gross or just a dumb bird. 
Gil proves to have the braincell for the group when he suggested giving whatever made Dude the dog talk to you.
Mal did it to “make the conversation change”
"Finally! I've been trying to get your attention forever!"
They all go wide eyed when you're voice comes out of the bird.
 "Yes it's me. (M/N). Audrey turned me into a raven and I went to find Ben but she changed him into a beast! You gotta help me save Ben!"
 Of course, even though you were a bird, Ben is a king, your boyfriend and a beast right now. You were helping him first.
 "Oh and Gil...can you scratch my head again?"
What? It felt good.
 Then Jay, Harry, Gil and Carlos went with you to find your boyfriend.
You guys find beast ben and slowly try to get his attention.
He turns and stalks towards you all.
He looks as if he’s about to pounce when Jane pops out of the trees and sprays him with water.
Ben roars and stumbles back rubbing his face. He drops his hands and looks relatively normal.
“What did you hit him with, Jane?” Jay asks.
“Enchanted lake water. Breaks most enchantments. Figured it couldn't hurt.”
 You let out a breath you hadn't realized you were holding.
 "Oh thank gods. I was so worried babe."
 Ben froze in place as he saw you talking.
"(M/N)?"
You flew over and landed on his shoulder.
"Hey Ben. Audrey got to me first. Thanks for not eating me earlier."
 Ben would then pet you.
 "I'm glad I didn't. That would be awkward...now how do we change you back? Jane?"
 "I kind of used the last of the water."
You look Ben up and down and he smiles at you.
“Gotta say Ben, I like the fangs and beard. Could be cleaner but...”
“Oh really?” Ben asks.
That when Harry whistles. “Sorry to break up that tender moment... but we have an angry Audrey to pursue...”
"Right! We'll have to figure something out later. I promise! I'll make sure to get you back" Ben said.
You knew he would. Ben always did.
 Returning to Evie's cottage, Uma seemed to be leaving in a mood.
Doug who had been asleep was now awake.
"Wait? How is he awake?"
"True love’s kiss."
You looked at Ben who looked back at you.
 "Why didn't we think of that?!" you said.
Ben rubbed the back of his head with a nervous look.
"Sorry."
“it’s alright. Lots happening. We’ll try later. First we deal with Audrey!”
Cue Audrey sealing you all in the cottage. 
Then mal and Uma break you guys out with some awesome cooperative magic.
You: “Aww you guys are friends again!”
Mal: “I’ll pluck your feathers...”
“Alright! Geez...”
Then everything with Mal came out.
 It made your heart break. Ben,Your boyfriend, your future husband, made a decision with Mal to not bring over any more VK's.
You couldn't believe it. You didn't want to accept it.
"So...you didn't even want to talk to me about this?" You said to him.
"I'm a VK Ben! You're wanting to stop any one else from getting the chance that I did? That's so wrong!"
 Now you really wish you had gotten that kiss earlier...cause this love didn't feel true anymore.
 Uma, Harry and Gil left...and so did you.
"I need to think."
"(M/N) wait!"
Did you leave on Gil’s shoulder, slumped against him? Yes yes you did.
It was all very confusing and pretty shocking.
While you understood where they were coming from... it... it just hurt. 
You all were back at the cottage, checking up on Dizzy and the twins. 
You were glad they weren’t awake to hear about all that. They had enough on their plates.
“So what do we do now?” You ask, walking on a table, everyone seated around it. 
Uma: “Nothing. Let Mal and Ben figure it out... they don’t deserve our help after that stunt.”
"I can't just sit by Uma. I'm mad...but not let Audrey go kind of mad. If anything I want just a bit of revenge."
Uma smirked at that.
"Good to know there's still a VK in there."
You extended your wings and fake bowed.
Eventually you all began heading back to the isle before Mal stopped you begging you all to help her.
"They were turned to stone. (M/N),Ben was turned to stone."
It didn't matter how hurt you were, you still loved Ben.
Without hesitation you hopped off Gil's shoulder and began flying back.
Arriving back at the cottage you saw them, Evie, Dude,Carlos, Jay and Ben...all statues.
You landed on Ben's out stretched stone arm.
"Oh Ben...What do I do?"
You sat there perched on Ben's arm, looking at his frozen face.
You regretted that the last thing you two did was fight.
Hopefully this would be fixed soon and you can apologize.
As if your wishes were answered. Ben and the rest were unfrozen and the people began waking up.
"Ben! Oh gods you're back! I'm sorry! I'm so sorry about how I left."
"(M/N). No I'm sorry. I should have asked you. I'm sorry I didn't."
With that Ben lifted his arm with you on it up and kissed your head.
In an instant you felt yourself changing and growing and soon you were back to being human.
You smiled and pulled Ben into a tight up.
"Forget waiting. Ben, I have no idea what's going to happen but I know I want to be with you. Let's get married."
He didn't disagree and your promise ring was now that engagement ring.
After making sure everyone was alright after everything that transpired you, Ben and Mal got to talking and came to a unanimous decision.
You all agreed it was time to take the barrier down and stop making the children of villains pay for their parents misdeeds.
You worked with the other VKs to make the process as fair and efficient as possible.
Ben pulled you away for a minute to hug you. 
“I know we’re still working on the rest of the VKs but I was thinking we could meet with Evie to talk about wedding stuff?”
“of course... we have a lot to plan... together.”
Evie was excited when you told her.
Ben and you also enjoyed the planning, especially the cake.
Your wedding was going to be amazing.
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pair-annoyed · 4 years
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Anime I Watched This Summer
Summer 2020 has officially come to a close. It’s fall in Animal Crossing and the trees are beginning to turn. Much like quarantine, I spent a lot of my free time watching anime when I wasn’t stressing over starting college. Now that the school year has begun, I thought it would be nice to reflect on everything I’ve watched! 
These Anime were seen between 6/14 - 8/31 (my Birthday!) and are listed in chronological order.
They will be rated on a 1-10 scale; 1 meaning complete garbage, 10 meaning masterpiece. I will offer my thoughts on what I did/didn't like about each show!
1. Bakemono no Ko - 8/10
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This was such a great way to start out the summer! I love the dynamic between Kumatetsu and Ren. Overall its a little cliche, but it’s also very wholesome. It’s by the same studio that made Wolf Children (which I loved!). so I knew it was going to be good. My favorite aspect of this movie was its backgrounds and world building! 
2. Wan Sheng Jie - 9/10
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Oh my gosh! I know that this is technically a donghua, but its on MAL, so it counts. This show quickly became my favorite slice of life of all time. I adore the art style and all of the characters. The comedy, plot, and design blends so well together. Everything in Wan Sheng Jie feels warm and comfy. It’s also confirmed for a second season! After seeing its cliff hanger ending, I’m so anxious for what comes next! 
3. Dororo - 7/10
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I’ll be honest, I’m a sucker for studio MAPPA. I really liked the historical aspects of Dororo. From the outfits to the ways characters behave, its grounded in the constraints of feudal Japan. I would have given this show a higher score if it was a little more grounded in science. I feel like more time should’ve been given to the demons and antagonists of the show. Our MC was so over powered, which made the final fights of the series more lack-luster. I think its less of the anime’s fault and more because the original source material is from the 60s. That being said, I loved this show! It was cute and action packed. Though it isn’t perfect, it holds its own.
4. Bungou Stray Dogs - 5/10
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The concepts and action are misconstrued in Bungou Stary Dogs. This is one of those shows that I chose to watch because it was all over Tumblr. The powers themselves are cool, but I can’t understand why this series is so praised. At it’s core its predictable and basic. The fights seemed low stakes and low energy. None of the humor really felt like it belonged. It tried too hard to be something it isn’t. I don’t think I’ll watch beyond this first season. 
5. Kami no Tou - 4.5/10
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First off, fuck Rachel, me and my homies hate Rachel. I really really had high hopes for Tower of God. It paves the way for Webtoon adaptations in the future. Its such a shame that this adaptation SUCKED. I have not read the source material, I’m going solely based on the anime. It wasn’t good? It was horrible. I hate Bam, I hate Rachel. I think all the characters expect Rak were awful. Please don’t make a season 2. Please. If you’re interesting in Tower of God, just read the webtoon. 
6. Gekkan Shoujo Nozaki-kun - 7/10
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Shoujo anime is my guilty pleasure. I especially liked the way Gekkan Shoujo tackled Sakura and Nozaki’s relationship. Besides just the main characters, even the side characters were enjoyable! It was a fun and creative show. My only complaint is how dense Nozaki is, but I also absolutely love that part of him.
7. Jojo no Kimyou no Bouken (Parts 1-2) - 6.5/10
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Jojo is not the saving grace of shounen anime. It isn’t something super revolutionary and it certainly will never be a 10/10. Part 1 was so slow and boring. Jonathan was just mediocre at best. I definitely liked Joseph a LOT more than Jonathan. Part 2 overall was much easier to watch than part 1. The fights are good, but there’s just something about Jojo that I can’t get behind. Although I’m completely bashing this series, I’m going to keep watching it. At this point, I wanna know what a stand is. 
8. Clannad - 5.5/10
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I was expecting Clannad to be sad, but instead I got a cute, slice of life, romance. It wasn’t unenjoyable, but it was also a pretty slow-burning show. I loved watching Nagisa and Okazaki slowly fall in love with each other. It was funny at times and sad at other points. I am currently watching Clannad: After Story (which I’ve heard is heartbreaking), so I’m hoping to get some catharsis out of that. 
9. Otome Game no Hametsu Flag shika Nai...  - 6/10
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This show is only 12 episodes, and yet it still has filler episodes for some reason? I’m a person who doesn’t typically watch isekai because the genre is so over done. However, when it’s done in a very specific way it’s really fun to watch! This show was definitely a lot of fun, it’s also cute and has so many interesting character-character interactions. The ending is painfully cliche, but I think it adds to this shows charm. 
10. Kaguya-sama wa Kokurasetai: Tensai-tachi no Renai Zunousen  - 8/10
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I loved Love is War so much! I love their weird romantic dynamic. I love the characters, and I love the animation. It’s over the top and executes it humor masterfully. The entire show fills you with anticipation for the two main characters. Kaguya is my favorite character. Although I haven’t seen season two yet, I most certainly will! I’m so upset I hadn’t seen this show sooner.
11. Great Pretender - 8.5/10
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This show is so colorful and bubbly. The animation is so smooth and they are able to tackle so many different kinds of things given its plot. The whole show itself just feels like summertime. It came out not to long ago, so some people may not be familiar with it. On top of the show itself, the music is great, with a Jazzy OP and and ED that features Freddie Mercury
12. Steins;Gate 0 - 8/10
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 I loved the original Stein;Gate so much! So it’s no surprise how much I liked the second season. It builds significantly off the first season in a sort of “off shot” OVA kind of way. The events of Steins;Gate 0 don’t actually happen, but that doesn’t stop it from being meaningful. The big “twist” was predictable and a bit of a let down, but I still enjoyed this. Granted, I’m bias. 
13. Seishun Buta Yarou wa Yumemiru Shoujo no Yume wo Minai - 9.5/10
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I sobbed. So much. This movie was phenomenal, it was such a trip. Having watched the original series, this tore my heart apart. It gets a high score for being able to take the characters I love and creating a wonderfully emotional experience. If you haven’t seen Bunny Girl Senpai, please watch it, and then watch this movie. You won’t regret it! 
14. Hotaru no Haka - 6/10
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Grave of the Fireflies made me stop watching anime for a while. Studio Ghibli created something grim, something that leaves the viewers feeling hollow. Its a movie about WWII from Japan’s perspective. As an American, all I could feel while watching this was immense guilt. I will say though, that some of the movies main plot could have easily been prevented if the main character had swallowed his pride. His younger sister was also my least favorite character. I get that she’s a kid and that kids are fussy, but you would think that during wartime, she’d be more understanding and at least try to eat the things she dislikes. 
15. Yagate Kimi ni Naru - 9/10
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This was a great way to end the summer. This is more that just GL romance, its a love story. Its about growing up and learning to understand your feelings. I related to Yuu so much, which made this more emotional than I expected. It’s really unlike another romance anime I’ve seen. I hope it gets confirmed for a second season. If not, I’ll be reading the manga. 
Seasonal Shows: (Things that are still airing as of 9/5/2020)
1. The God of High School  7.5/10
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Another thing done by studio MAPPA. Are you surprised? I absolutely love the action in GoH. The plot however, is all over the place. The story seems fragmented and hard to follow. Like Tower of God, it was poorly adapted. I’m giving it such a high score, because it’s SO much more enjoyable then Tower of God. 
2. Enen no Shouboutai: Ni no Shou - 4/10
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My thoughts on season 2 are about the same as my thoughts on season 1. The only difference is that this season has more Jojo references. I’ve rated it lower because its so repetitive. I’m so sick of watching it, but I’ve got to see it through the bitter end.   
3. Re:Zero kara Hajimeru Isekai Seikatsu 2nd Season - 8.5/10 
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All I’m going to say about Re:Zero is that I love it. I can’t give an accurate review of it because I’ve been hyping this season since it was announced. If you’re into non-typical isekai, watch Re:Zero, its so enjoyable!
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Note
Oh my if you write for Nikolai can i request him and morozova reader who is also a shadow summoner ( the reader works against the darkling and is on alina sides) and reader is a little bit self conscious about her shadows because the darkling make them use them for evil reasons,but for nikolai they are beautiful?
Also,thank you if you decide ti write this and i love your blog❤️
Shadow Saint- Nikolai Lantsov
I absolutely can do this, thank you so much! I love this idea and I’m very excited to get into it!
This takes place circa Siege and Storm, by the way!
Fic type- fluff
Warnings- none
You’d known Nikolai as long as you could remember, and he knew of your powers, encouraged that you used them, but you tended to like keeping your abilites to yourself more than you did show them to others. 
It was something that Nikolai didn’t understand; so what if your brother used them for evil? So what if he created the fold and the volcra and the nichevo’ya along with it all? Your brother was evil. Your brother was the Darkling; he was Alinas worst enemy and the object of everyones hatred, but you weren’t him. You were Y/N Morozova. You were good. You were kind and wonderful and attractive and your laugh filled a room with light brighter than Alinas. 
He’d often catch you using the darkness at random. Spinning shadows between your fingers, darkening a space when it got too bright for your liking, bringing shade on exceptionally hot days, but he never said anything. He figured that, well, at least you were using them, right?
Alina, of course, had to train, as did you and some of the other Grisha that were staying on the compound, so, when Nikolai asked, you hesitantly agreed with him, still insecure as ever about the evils that your powers held, ones created by your brother, ones that your mother wasn’t able to stop.
“How old are you?” He asked as the two of you walked through the Spinning Wheel, trying to make your way to the elevator.
“I’m twenty-one,” you responded. “Just like you, Nik.” He hated to admit it, but he loved the nickname you’d given him, even despite how simple it was. 
“No,” Nikolai quipped. :If The Darkling is around 415, how old are you?”
“Oh,” you responded. “You mean my actual age, not how young I’ve kept my face?” Nikolai laughed at that as the two of you entered the elevator.
“I’m 410, technically speaking,” 
“I always knew I could’ve fallen for someone at least a couple hundred years older than me,” he teased, intertwining your fingers. 
A red flush came to your cheeks as the elevator slammed downward. When the door opened, you saw Alina, smiling and waiting for you so that your training could start.
She and Genya took either of your arms as Nikolai moved to have a chat with Mal and David, gently leading you to the center of the grounds. “You know he loves you, right?” Genya teased, running a hand along your face as the three of you stopped walking. “He’d give his life to save yours if a situation called for it!”
“I’d do the same,” you responded, turning to look at Alina. “I just don’t like the overwhelming odds that I may someday go mad and kill him.”
“The Darkling went mad after creating The Fold,” Alina reminded. “He went mad with power, which you dislike. You and brother might be siblings, but it does not mean that you’re destined to the same fates.” 
“I hate that I-”
“It’s a gift,” Genya insisted. “You never get too warm in Summer, you can create shadows, which essentially means that you can make yourself look ethereal--though theres no need, you’re easily the more attractive of you and your brother-- and it comes in handy when the room gets too bright and too warm!”
“You are not your brother,” Alina affirms. “He’s crude, cruel, evil, but you aren’t. You’re...you’re a...” 
“A shadow saint,” Nikolai supplies. “Now, listen, I’d love to get to chat for a long, long time, but we can get back to talking once this demostration is done. Alina, stand 100 paces away, I’ll stay beside Y/N.” 
She did as asked, and Genya followed. Nikolai took your hand in his and pressed a kiss to your cheek in reassurance.
“I don’t think I can do this,” you murmured. Nikolai laughed.
“I’ll help you,” he murmured, moving to stand in front of you and dropping your hand. “Put the shadows around me, first. Then let them expand.”
“Nikolai-”
“Our beloved Sun Summoner will bring the light seconds after, Y/N,” he insisted, pressing a quick kiss to your lips and offering you a wide grin. “I promise, your shadows don’t scare me, and you exhaust yourself in keeping your power down.” You gave him one last look, awaiting the okay, and receiving it in the form of an enthusiastic nod on Nikolais part. 
You extended both hands, willing the shadows to come forth, and almost crying when they, watching them engulf Nikolai and the air around him, making him look invisible. 
Alina combated your darkness with her light merely seconds later, and you watched Nikolai once again come into view, wide smile on his face as he gestured about with his hands, motioning to you at the last second.
You let your shadows arc and twist and run, and watched, almost gleefully, as Alinas light followed them with astonishing speeds, curling and twisting around one another like like and shadow were meant to.
Once the demonstration was over, Nikolai tackled you in a hug, which you reciprocated with a laugh. “You did it!” He shouted gleefully. “You used your powers and you looked--” he cut himself off, just to release you from the hug and keep a firm hold on your shoulders.
“Ethereal, love! Absolutely ethereal!” Your face flushed with the compliment, and as Nikolai pressed his lips to yours, you figured perhaps your powers weren’t so terrible. 
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greensaplinggrace · 3 years
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What Is There To Celebrate About the Darkling? (Part 4)
1 2 3 4
He’s calculating but impulsive. Gentle yet firm. Stubborn and adaptive. Just a real mess of contradictions that makes him all the more interesting.
He loves nature. He loves the forest.
Fond of luxuries and nice things. After growing up as he did, I think he deserves them.
Very socially awkward. Introvert just trying his best. Anything that isn’t manipulation and therefore something he’s planned in his head is just a social train wreck waiting to happen.
The way he pushes up Alina’s sleeve when they first meet. This man had zero compunctions about acting completely unprofessionally in front of his soldiers and I think that’s very sexy of him.
He’s constantly tired and exasperated with the people around him.
The way he says “quiet” with the softest voice imaginable and a room full of laughter instantly goes silent.
He had no interest in Elizaveta even though she was utterly obsessed with him and I think that’s hilarious.
Elizaveta: I have a plan to resurrect the Darkling Everybody Else: Oh the Darkling is so evil for trying to come back! The Darkling, who just wants a nap and is sick of this mortal bullshit: Why am I even here? This is such a pain in the ass. I should have killed Elizaveta when I had the chance.
How he asks if Alina “will have” his name like a man proposing.
Has his bedroom attached to the war room.
Constantly checking up on Alina just to know how she’s doing. Never pushing her beyond her limits as she’s training.
Very creative with his shadows and the extent of their abilities. So many of the ways he uses his powers are genius.
His ending in RoW is a tragedy and an injustice. He deserves better.
This old man pouting at Alina in episode seven as he says “please, I just want to talk to you 🥺”
There is a black kefta made for Alina after like two days in the Little Palace. He really was already planning their entire immortal futures together as Mr. and Mrs. Starkov wasn’t he?
His bed is covered in maps and notes when he’s plotting how to find Alina. Also before that, the way he’s poring over the notes at his desk and giving orders is 👌🥵
Him acting like a real General at all is simply amazing.
The fact that he trusts Luda with his life. That they have a whole intimidation routine set up around him purposefully getting himself fatally injured knowing she’ll heal him.
He looks like a vampire in the show and a fae in the books.
His favorite ABBA song is probably “Lay All Your Love On Me.”
Looks composed but that’s only a façade. Is actually an unhinged feral terror of pain and misery.
That scene where he tells the king she will remain in the Little Palace to train undisturbed and he puts his foot down. ON THE RED CARPET. the king’s carpet. and uses a commanding voice that’s just on the edge of an order…I’m surprised he didn’t get flogged for that. IMO nothing conveys the fine line he walks with those in power while wielding his own like this scene. Literally he should just be celebrated for this alone.
“‘Why won’t you leave me alone?’ I whispered one night as he hovered behind me while I tried to work at my desk. Long minutes passed. I didn’t think he would answer. I even had time to hope he might have gone, until I felt his hand on my shoulder. “Then I’d be alone, too,” he said, and he stayed the whole night through, till the lamps burned down to nothing.
Trapped a bunch of Saints in the Shadow Fold like a true amoral disaster villain. What an icon.
His barely concealed amusement and half hidden smile when Alina comes to put his kefta on. The way he finds Alina utterly hilarious and tries so hard to act like he doesn’t.
That small amused smile when Alina jokes about finding Volcra hilarious. Please he’s so adorable 😭
“‘I know what you feel when you’re with the tracker,’ he said. ‘I doubt that’ He gave a dismissive wave.” - My Malarklina obsessed self, vibrating at the edge of my seat: but what does it mean?!?
Mal and the Darkling’s entire fight in the Fold: dumbass on dumbass violence.
The way he stands with his back turned to Alina when she enters his tent the first time they meet and then does the slowest Godfather turn in history. 1999/10 - points removed for a criminal lack of cat petting.
“I may lead the second army, but the king is still the king.” - the delivery of that line. the implications, the history behind it and also the foreshadowing for his plans.
That slow turn face reveal in episode one though. Like okay we get it you’re pretty alkjsdflkj
Confused Old Man Face™ whenever Mal or Alina do anything remotely defiant in his presence.
How he tells Alina to come closer and she only takes the tiniest step and he doesn’t even react.
His little head cock whenever someone says or does something that just doesn’t vibe with him.
Darklina tumblr has now convinced me that the Darkling is a cat in human form.
“You’re an amplifier,” she said. He glanced at where Sylvi was pouncing on another helpless tree, oblivious, and gave a single, frightened nod. How could he have been so stupid? He would have to tell his mother now, and she would insist that they leave right away. If word got out, they’d both be in danger. Amplifiers were rare, hard to find, harder to hunt. Their lives would be forfeit. Even if they got away, word would spread. He could already hear his mother’s voice: Foolish, careless, callous. If you don’t value your own life, show some concern for mine. Annika touched his sleeve. “It’s okay,” she said. “I won’t tell.” Panic crowded in. He shook his head. She slid her hand into his. It was hard not to pull away. He should. He was breaking his mother’s fundamental rule for keeping them both alive. Never let them touch you, she’d warned him. - 😥 I just want to give him a hug all the time.
His strangled shout when Mal tackles him off of the skiff.
His smile when he’s summoning the sun. The expression on his face when he does so. Like I know I’ve mentioned this before but damn. If you ever needed a reason to celebrate him, this would be it.
“Shame, I’ll have to give that speech again now.”
The way he flips Mal over his shoulder in the Fold after Mal attempts to strangle him.
His little lecture on the Small Science to Alina when they’re going to meet the King. Info dump.
“You make it sound so easy.” “A bird makes flight look easy. But it was born to do so.”
When Alina looks at him for guidance on whether or not to remove her veil and he gives her a small nod.
The handhold in the throne room after Alina’s demonstration is absolutely precious, but it’s in a room full of people he should be keeping up a façade for and it’s so unwarranted and yet he does it anyway, I’m-
The way he says “welcome home, Ms. Starkov,” in the most tender voice I’ve ever heard and then goes “ok that’s enough emotions for one day” and then just straight up leaves without even a goodbye.
He has his symbol?? Sewn into Alina’s kefta??? bRo???!?!
Disaster Simp never gets tired of introducing Alina to other people or talking about how she’s the best thing that ever walked this earth.
The Darkling lying: honestly
“I have devoted my life to undoing the great sin of my forebearer, but I am never seen as the solution. Only as a reminder of the problem.” Sasha you were literally the problem. What a manipulative little shit. We love to see it.
The way he closes his eyes and kisses the coin before he makes a wish at the wishing well.
“I think the Grand Palace is the ugliest building I’ve ever seen.” - I love him your honor.
This man has the most intense lines for Alina. Like straight up I would have booked it when he said “you and I are going to change the world”. But then the head grab?! “I’ve been waiting a long time for you.” He’s so intense like sir can you tone it down a bit please I am begging you.
“I shall be right by your side.” / “We can do anything. Together.” / “For us.” / “You cannot do this on your own. And neither can I” / “I want you to know my name. The name I was given, not the title I took for myself. Will you have it, Alina?” - WEDDING VOWS
That scene in the war room when Alina comes to find him and he instantly drops his guard and lowers his arms and welcomes her with a soft voice.
“Am I bothering you?” “Not at all.” - girl you could be stabbing him in the chest and you still wouldn’t be bothering him.
This whipped disaster sounds like the proudest man on the planet when he talks about how much more his enemies fear Alina over him.
His shadows react to his emotions.
“YoUr’E nOt IvAn.” asjlkdfjs god he’s so embarrassing.
Local Dark Lord Sasha offering Alina the throne after she literally tries to kill him.
He gets so jealous of Mal.
Has a great relationship with his soldiers and his men. His men trust him implicitly and believe him to be an amazing general.
When he turns around after Alina puts the kefta on him and looks flustered/has to take a breath because she’s a lot closer than he expected. The way he’s breathless and literally can’t string a sentence together because he’s so distracted by her closeness.
His jokes are absolutely terrible.
GF: *jokes about throwing herself down the stairs to get out of an event* Sasha “no thoughts head empty only Alina” Morozova: haha I’d just have my healers heal you right back up again.
How genuinely touched he is by Alina admitting to wanting to help Grisha and Ravkans.
That scene in Demon in the Woods when he notices the intricate details of the politics in the Grisha camp after one meeting with the Elders. He has the Ulle pegged almost instantly.
Born to be a leader. Born to take care of others. Born to protect. Even in Demon in the Woods he’s protecting people. Even in Demon in the Woods he’s leading them and caring for them.
The way he cups his hands around Alina’s face when they’re kissing.
This man gets so starstruck by Alina walking into the Fete that he doesn’t even excuse himself from the King’s side to go to her.
Long haired Aleksander rights!
Ok I know the wig was kind of ugly but he looks pretty with long hair and I think it would look very good on him naturally.
The way he slams his hands together in the Winter Fete scene and instantly turns the room pitch black.
Literally any times he summons shadows is a blessing and we should all celebrate him for it. They are so beautiful. On god if I ever saw his shadows in real life I would be awestruck.
He asks Mal if he’s okay when they first meet.
The pure, barely contained fury directed at the Conductor for daring to harm Alina and kidnap his Grisha.
He always has to make a grand entrance.
This man is like a bloodhound when it comes to Nina. He is very invested in finding her and I feel like that’s never really talked about.
“I know exactly how she felt. The King’s soldiers treated me the same way. Because they knew- they knew that I was more important than any of them.” - the way he says it, like it’s something he has to remind himself of in his head constantly. a justification for the way he’s been treated, the fear he evokes in others. a way to protect himself from the hurt of being ostracized and reviled. arrogance and conceit as a defense against emotional harm.
Also the way his face instantly changes after that, like he’s said too much. vulnerability. lowering his eyes. shifting his eyes. literally just everything about this scene makes me love him all the more.
Dark carriage rides up to the Crows’ hiding place. Grisha circle the area as Aleksander steps from the carriage slowly, dressed all in black, floofy cloak high on his shoulders. Villain Entrance™
Him slowly pulling a knife out of his chest like it shouldn’t have killed him is hot as fuck and also totally badass. Big dick energy.
“I’ve had enough of your lies.” “And what lies are those?” - Alina, pulling out a fifty mile long scroll of grievances: Well, for starters-
This man is literally just an Alina Starkov compliments machine.
He cares so much about the Grisha and their protection. He loves Ravka and his people so much.
He had an entire cult dedicated to him.
“They would approach him. They always did. But he felt more anxious than usual. He’d stopped trying to make friends in the places he and his mother visited—there was no point when they moved on so quickly. Now he wasn’t quite sure how to go about it.”
Save a Villain. Murder the King.
Openly admits to staging a coup like it’s the most natural thing in the world.
He speaks so slowly. He moves so slowly. Everything he does has to have Purpose and Gravitas.
Theater Nerd™
He knew Nikolai for years and yet couldn’t recognize him as Sturmhond. We do stan an oblivious icon 💕
The Darkling after he gets his ass whooped in Siege and Storm: Mom can you please come pick me up? I’m scared!
He’s here to manipulate sun summoners and murder cities. And unfortunately he’s all out of sun summoners.
Would absolutely get drunk on real alcohol. This man thinks kvas is strong liquor.
Has his wrists exposed exactly one time in the most skin he’s shown all season and it’s when Alina visits him at night in the war room. WHORE!
Was too emotionally slutty and fell for Alina. RIP.
He’s passionate and cold and beautiful and hurt and twisted up in ways nobody could ever hope to understand and he’s stunning.
I would literally kill for this man 🖤✨
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dontcare77ghj · 3 years
Text
Inked
Natasha x reader x Wanda
"You know those cause cancer, right?" Mal asked, entering your office. "And you're gonna stink out your office."
"The window's open." You shrugged, exhaling slowly and sending the smoke out the open window. "And you and I both know, cancer isn't something I'm scared of."
"Yeah, yeah, death licks your boots." Mal rolled her eyes, blowing a strand of blue hair out of her eyes. "Anyway, I'm going on break, Blaine's with a customer, and we've got a walk-in."
"I'll handle it." You promised, putting out your cigarette. "You going to pick up Erin?" You asked the younger girl.
"Yeah, I'm gonna drop her off with a neighbor. May offered and wouldn't let me refuse." She told you.
"Well, here. Get Erin something sweet for me." You said, shoving a twenty into her hands.
"Y/N, I can't." Mal started, trying to give you the money back.
"I insist." You cut her off. "I want to be her favorite aunt." You shrugged, forcing her to curl her fingers around the money. "Go, get your kid, and give her a hug for me."
"Will do, boss." She nodded before leaving.
"Hi, welcome to SkinPolish. How can I help you?" You asked, entering the main room to see the back of a man. He was looking over the walls of the store but turned at your entrance.
"Just so you know, I'm not here to get stabbed a thousand times," Clint told you with a grin.
"I think your day job provides you with enough of that." You joked, wrapping your arms around him. Clint chuckled as he returned your hug, pulling you close. "It's been too long, geezer."
"I know, you've got at least four more tattoos since the last time I saw you, you hoodlum." Clint teased you.
"It's been two years, Clint. Some of us had to change our identities." You reminded him, pulling back. "What are you doing here?"
"I need your help." He told you.
"Blaine, watch the shop." You said without taking your eyes off the man before you.
"You got it, Y/N!"
"Follow me." You told Clint. You led Clint out of the front of the store and into your office. "Clint, I left when SHIELD fell. I handed in my clearance and took off." You said, lighting another cigarette. "I'm not doing any more work for them."
"Don't be like that." Clint groaned, sitting on your desk. 
"First off, get the fuck off my desk. Where are the manners Laura shoved down your throat? And secondly, I can't come back. Fucking HYDRA was running SHIELD for years, and none of us knew. All our information was in their hands. Who knows what they took? I have people I care about, Clint. I can't risk anyone's lives." You told him.
"I'm not asking you to do anything for SHIELD. I'm asking you to help the Avengers." Clint explained.
"Even better, a more public job." You scoffed. "Clint, we're friends. We've been through a lot. I get why you're here, but why the fuck would I risk the people I care about for another mission?"
"Argentina." He said simply.
"That is a dick move, and you know it." You groaned, finishing your smoke.  
"I do know it, but I have to use it. We need your help." Clint said, rising from your desk to stand in front of you. "We need your help, kid. I wouldn't be asking if I had another choice." 
"Fine." You relented after a minute. "When do you need me?"
"Tomorrow," Clint told you. "I'll pick you up." He added before going to leave.
"You don't know where I live." You protested.
"Yeah, I do." Clint corrected you. "I'll see you at nine." He said, and with that, he was gone.
"Fuck me." You sighed, rubbing your hand across your face.
"Remind me why I agreed to this again?" You asked, watching as the Avengers Compound grew closer through the window.
"Because you love me," Clint responded cheekily.
"Keep telling yourself that, sweetheart." You rolled your eyes. "You never even told me what I'm needed for."
"Briefing's in half-hour," Clint told you. "Which gives you enough time to get acquainted with everyone." He added as the car slowed to a stop.
"You know how I feel about crowds of people." 
"It's not a crowd. It's the team and Maria. You're fine, kid, I promise." He said.
"Fine, let's get this over with." You sighed, unclicking your belt.
"Avengers!" Clint called as the two of you moved further into the maze of a building. "I have a surprise for you all!" 
"Is it a unicorn?" A male voice asked as you both entered what looked to be a meeting room.
"Even better. Gentlemen, and Wanda,"
"Smooth Barton." A redhead coughed.
"This is Y/N L/N." Clint continued his introduction. "A specialist in all fields, especially disguise, and the only reason we might do our job today."
"Oh, so I'm doing your work for you again, Barton? Nothing's changed, I see." You commented. 
"Hey! That's not true! Name one time that's ever been true!"
"I can list fifty off the top of my head." You said, raising a brow at him.
"I can add sixty-seven to your list." The redhead piped in. "Natasha Romanoff." She introduced herself.
"Pleasure Agent Romanoff." You smiled. "C'mon Barton, formal introductions, please."
"Yeah, Barton. Introduce us." 
"Y/N, this is Tony, Steve, Bruce, Thor, and Wanda." Clint gestured. "Are you all satisfied?"
"Not particularly, since you still haven't told me what you need my help for." You said, crossing your arms.
"You haven't even told her that. Jesus Barton." Wanda snorted.
"I was getting to that. I was waiting for you all to meet." Clint whined. 
"Well, we're met." You said, taking an empty seat beside Natasha. "C'mon, what am I doing here?"
"There's a gala tonight," Natasha said, handing you a file. "A man named Jayden Reeds is going to be in attendance. Reeds has stock in several large companies, but that's just a front. Reeds actually has ties to HYDRA and deals in human trafficking. From what we've gathered, Reeds kidnaps people who will seemingly not be missed. They're then delivered to HYDRA bases around the world and never heard from again."
"Am I here to kill him? Because I can get behind that." You said, shaking your head.
"Wait till you hear the rest," Clint told you.
"There is a possibility Reeds also has his own collection. He's been spotted with several women who have all disappeared shortly after."
"What's the connection between them?" You asked.
"They're all French brunettes."
"So let me guess, my job is to go undercover tonight and see if he takes the bait. And when he does, I bring him in."
"Bingo Boingo," Tony told you.
"Well, I guess I better find a long sleeve dress. Oh, and maybe a wig."
"You know, if I didn't know better, I would have assumed your accent was real myself," Wanda commented later that night.
The mission had gone as smoothly as could be. Reeds had fallen for your act believing you to be a young French brunette on vacation in America's busiest city.
You hadn't even needed to corner him as he'd followed you into a woman's bathroom with two other men. 
You hadn't given any of them a chance to move or say anything before you had them unconscious on the ground.
Now you were heading home, still decked out in your gala gown, with Natasha, Wanda, Clint, and Tony.
"It's not that good. No matter how much I practice, even my Italian's better than my French." You shrugged.
"Not that good?" Tony snorted, glancing at you in the rearview mirror. "Sweetheart, if I weren't engaged and I met you in Paris, I'd take you back to Hotel Plaza Athenee and show you a time."
"Cute, Starky boy, but you're not my type."
"I'm everyone's type."
"Sorry, hon, but I like women." You told him. "This is my stop." You added as Tony pulled over.
"You live here?" Natasha asked, looking around the neighborhood in distaste. You could understand her aversion to the area. Any one of your neighbors would move in an instant if given the choice.
"Yep." You said, unclicking your belt. "Been here since SHIELD crashed."
"Did SHIELD pay this bad?" Tony questioned you.
"SHIELD pay wasn't great, but it was something. I saved most of it, but a lot of it went to making sure Y/N Smith, the tattoo artist from the wrong side, wasn't connected with Y/N L/N, SHIELD agent." You shrugged. "Didn't see a point in moving after." You added. "This was fun. We should do it again sometime." You said, sliding out and holding the door open.
"We'll give you a call if we need someone to do all the work for us." Clint nodded.
"Great. Come by the shop if you ever want a free tattoo. Clint knows where it is." 
A part of you was sure you wouldn't see any of the team again. They led much more busy lives than you did, and their schedules were forever changing.
So imagine your surprise when Natasha and Wanda entered your shop the next day just to simply chat. And they continued to do so for a week. Sometimes Clint would come, Steve had popped in for a few minutes while on a run, but Natasha and Wanda visited every day. 
On the seventh day, the two came in at one in the afternoon with Tony.
"Hey, Tony. I didn't know you were coming to lunch with us." You said, continuing to lock up the shop. "I'll be ready in a couple minutes."
"Great, but there's been a slight change of plans," Natasha said, watching you closely.
"As long as foods still involved, I won't be too bothered." You shrugged.
"Food is involved. It's just going to take us a while to get to it." Tony cryptically informed you.
"Guys, I'm running on twenty minutes of sleep and caffeine. Please, no cryptics." You sighed, narrowing your eyes at the three.
"Relax, we're not trying to hurt your head." Tony chuckled. "We have something to tell you."
"But first, step this way, away from any possibly hidden weapons," Natasha said, gesturing you forward. "No-one should get a knife to the head because they shocked you."
"Haha." You rolled your eyes, walking forward. "For the record, I did that once. And Clint caught it." You added. "What did you three do?"
"Technically, Tony did it," Wanda said, pointing a thumb at the billionaire.
"Real smooth, Sabrina." Tony scoffed. "Alright, yes, I did this, but I did it out of pure kindness."
"Did what?" 
"I've had all your stuff moved out of your apartment. I've had it moved into a spare room in the Compound," Tony announced. 
"Put it back, Tony." You demanded, crossing your arms. "My things aren't yours to touch."
"You live in a shitty neighborhood." Tony defended himself. "You have eight security systems of your own just to keep yourself safe. You won't find a new place of your own volition, so I found one for you."
"Tony, you moved my things into the Avengers Compound." You sighed. "I'm not an Avenger."
"Yet." Tony cut you off. "You are more than qualified to join the team. The way you helped us the other night, the way you took those men out and got the information quicker than we would have done. You can be an Avenger."
"I'm not risking those closest to me." You shook your head. "I gave up Y/N L/N when I left SHIELD. I have people in my life now, civilian people, who could get hurt because of me."
"Than don't let them," Natasha said. "I've been through your records, know how many people you helped and protected. Protect those you love just as you did all the strangers. You can still lead this life as well as one where you can protect people again."
"At least try temporarily," Wanda suggested. "Give it a month trial period and see if you can remember what it feels like. If it doesn't work out, you don't have to do anything you don't want to. And if it does work, you can join our team. Please." She added, giving you puppy dog eyes.
"Fine. A trial period." You sighed, pushing your hair back. "But no more using those eyes. It's evil, and you know it." You said, pointing at the witch.
"Yes, she does." Natasha smiled, putting her arm around her girlfriend's waist. "C'mon, there's a car waiting to take us back to the Compound."
"Where Tony ordered lunch," Wanda added, putting her hand out to you to take.
"At least he did one thing right." You joked, taking her petite hand.
"Hey!"
You had been staying at the Compound for almost a month. There were four days before the end of your trial period, but you hadn't made your decision yet. 
There was still a part of you that thought it would no longer be safe for the civilians in your life if you joined the team. If you entered the Avengers, you might have to give up this identity and everything and everyone that came with it.
But there was something about being around the team that ignited a spark within you. A spark you long thought had burned out. You longed for adventure, for that adrenaline rush that came with being undercover and the pride you felt at helping someone. 
You were torn between two worlds. Torn between two personalities.
"Jesus Christ, you smell like an ashtray," Natasha complained as she suddenly appeared by your side. You snapped out of your daze just in time to see Natasha take the smoke out of your hand and take a drag for herself.
"Didn't know you smoked." You commented, watching her exhale the smoke slowly.
"I don't. Not anymore." Natasha shook her head. "Just couldn't resist."
"Don't expect me to kiss you until you brush your teeth," Wanda said, skipping into the room and crossing her arms as she stared at the two of you. "I want a tattoo." She announced, staring you dead in the eye.
"Okay. Do you want me to find a parlor for you in the morning? I have a couple friends who owe me a favor or two." You suggested.
"No, I want you to do it," Wanda told you firmly. "As soon as possible if you would." 
"And you're sure about this?" You asked, raising a brow. "You're sure you want a tattoo and that you want me to do it?"
"Yes." She nodded.
"Alright, then. Follow me." You said, leading the two back into the Compound and into your room.
"You have a gun and inks in your room?" Natasha asked, looking your makeshift parlor over.
"Yep. Set it up the night I arrived, gave myself this the next." You said, lifting your shirt to reveal the healing tattoo on your hip.
"Geez, you know most people drink a bottle of scotch to welcome themselves to a new place? Not give themselves a tattoo." Natasha informed you.
"Probably." You nodded, beginning to set up your station. "Okay, Wanda, what did you have in mind?"
"I want the words, 'Ty namnogo bol'she' to wrap around my wrist," Wanda said, tracing around her thin wrist with her finger.
"Alright, I can definitely do that. But you might have to write it down for me. My Russian's not that great." You informed her.
"We'll have to work on that," Natasha said as Wanda began to write it down.
"Alright." You began after Wanda handed you the spelling. "Let's get started."
"I love it." Wanda smiled, watching as you gently wrapped her wrist. "It's perfect." 
"I like to do my best." You grinned, putting the last of the tape down. "Make sure that stays moist. And do not scratch it under any circumstances." You instructed her as you began to shove your equipment away in plastic tubs.
"You need a better system," Natasha commented. "Yours is kind of a mess."
"I'll update my system when I change this room around." You said, looking around the nearly bare room. Everything you owned was in plastic tubs or bags. You hadn't been bothered to unpack yet.
"Does that mean you're planning on staying?" Natasha asked. "Have you made your decision yet? To join the team or not?"
"Not yet. I'm still trying to decide." You sighed, leaning against the wall. "I like not giving a shit. I like waking up in the morning and paying too much for a shitty cup of coffee. I like going to work and being around people who've never had to see the shit we have. I like not having to feel like the weight of the world is on my shoulders, but I miss it. 
I miss being a part of a team. I liked saving people. I enjoyed going on missions, creating new personas to get what I needed done. I miss being around people who've seen the shit I have. Who know what the weight of the world feels like. 
Now I don't where to go. What I need more in my life." You told them.
"We told you, you don't need to pick one world," Wanda said, standing from her stool. "You can still save people and drink over-priced coffee. You can still be with people who share your trauma and be with those who don't. You don't have to pick one world."
"Can we help your decision along by us asking you out to dinner?" Natasha asked, breaking your pensive silence.
"Excuse me?" You asked, for once being taken aback by another person. "I think I went temporarily deaf there. Can you repeat yourself?"
"Let us take you on a date," Natasha repeated slowly. "We were thinking about dinner and wine and then a night at the opera." She said, causing your nose to scrunch up without thought.
"She's kidding." Wanda giggled. "Actually, we were thinking we get a couple beers, order a pizza, and watch a movie in our room."
"Can I pick the movie?" You asked her.
"With your crappy taste, no." Wanda shook her head.
"Okay, now she's kidding," Natasha said, taking three steps forward to stand beside her girlfriend. "Of course, you can pick the movie."
"And this wouldn't hurt your relationship?" You asked tentatively. "I wouldn't ruin what you already have?"
"You could only add." Wanda smiled.
"So, what do you say? You wanna go on a date with us?" Natasha questioned you.
"I'd love to."
"Go away.” You groaned, rolling away and under the covers into Natasha’s body.
“Wakey, wakey. Up and at ‘em you two.” Wanda ordered, pulling the blankets off the pair of you. 
“Wanda!” 
“Both of you will forgive me when I tell you I have coffee.” Wanda rolled her eyes, sitting on the bed beside you.
“The overpriced kind?”
“What other kind is there?” Wanda asked. “C’mon sit up or no coffee for either of you.”
“Alright, alright, we’re up.” Natasha said, sitting up with you on her chest. “Thank you, sweetheart.” 
“I love you.” You groaned after taking the first sip of your steaming beverage.
“Are you talking to me or the coffee?” 
“Can’t it be both?” You shrugged before grabbing her hand and kissing her palm softly.
“As long as there’s love for me too, it can.” Natasha told you.
“I love you too, Nat.” You promised, kissing her collarbone.
“After today’s meeting, I want you to give me a tattoo.” Natasha announced. “I don’t care where is is, but I want ‘YA zasluzhivayu lyubvi’.” She told you. 
“Alright then. I like this plan.” You smiled, looking up at your girlfriend. “You know I think I’m due for some new ink myself.”
“What are you gonna do?”
“I don’t know. Maybe you can choose for me.” You shrugged. “I trust you both, always.”
Once, you left SHIELD and it’s lifestyle behind. And then one day Clint Barton walked into your shop and brought you back into it. 
He brought you back to the life you missed and brought you to Natasha and Wanda.
Remember all Taglists are open as are requests. 
Taglist
@rvgrsbrns @smilexcaptainx @hopingforbarnes @starlingelliot @piper-koko-barnes-rogers @jelly-fishy-babie @skeletoresinthebasement @agent-barnes40 @reann-loves-sebstan @skadikh @summergeezburr @buckybarton03 @sunshinepower17 @bindythedemon @natasharomanoffismywife @keenmarvellover @bbybarness @storiesbystarlight @buckybarnesplumwhore @bromieeeomieee @marvelmenarebeautiful @niki-is-a-thing @pauloonig @abyssiniapleasant @beautybyfire @officalmarvelbaby
Natasha Romanoff Taglist
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All women Taglist
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