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dracosathenaeum · 4 years

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Words Hurt

Summary: You overheard Draco insulting you to Notts and Blaise.

Pairing: Draco Malfoy x Reader

Warnings: Swear words

Word count: 2,572

Sneaking into Draco’s dorm room had become a skill by now. Getting into the Slytherin common room was the easy part. Sneaking into his room without students noticing was slightly more difficult. The trick? Stealing one of Draco’s robes so you looked the part.

Having done this countless times, you expected to waltz into his room and find him on his bed or at his desk. What you didn’t expect to see-, well hear was loud laughter coming from his room. With his door ajar you peeked through to see him pacing the room, his back to you, Blaise and Nott sprawled across his bed. Draco hated having anyone but you in his room let alone his bed, what was going on?

“It’s such a pain, it’s like she’s always there. No matter where I go, she’s right there, she’s like a leech that won’t let go! God she’s so annoying, would it kill her to give me some space?!”

Taken aback, you hold a hand to your thundering heart as your fight or flight kicks in. You could storm in there, confront him there and then about it, but what if he broke up with you? It took months to get to where you are now, for him to open up completely, for you to break down his walls. Putting your ear to the door again, you listen, just in case, just in case it was a misunderstanding.

“Mate she doesn’t seem that bad, I mean she’s hot and bloody whipped for your sorry arse.” That comment from Zabini earned a high five and laugh from Notts.

“A leech Zabini, did you not hear? A leech. She always has to spend every waking hour with me. It’s a surprise she hasn’t barged in yet.” And with a sigh he slumps into his chair by the desk, hand massaging his temples.

You were known for being touchy, that’s just how you showed affection. But for your boyfriend talk about you like that? You needed time to think. You needed to do something for Draco to make him regret his words. It just required a little… careful planning. Draco was known for being a possessive bastard for a reason after all.

Walking into the Great hall the following morning (after having spent the previous evening ignoring Draco’s letters asking for you to meet him) you had a different air around you, a sense of purpose. You walked straight to the Y/H table, members of your own house gawking as you sat down next to your friends for the first time since you started dating Draco. You were still close with your house mates, you just preferred eating with Draco, and besides, Slytherins were fun in their own sense.

“Uh, did you get lost or something? WAIT did you two fight? Because if you did, I so called it. Mia you owe me 5 galleons, pay up!”

“Wait wait wait, you guys bet on my relationship with Draco?” This was a very Slytherin type of thing to do, to say this was unexpected was an understatement.

“Every house has bet on you two Y/N/N, we love you obviously, but there’s galleons to be made.” You had definitely chosen your best friends right.

“I hate you.” You stick out your tongue just to emphasise the point. “Now, has Draco noticed yet, has he looked over?” Not turning your head around to peak was the extremely difficult, everything in your body was telling you to turn around.

“Uh I don’t know what happened between you two but he does not look happy with you, if looks could kill…” Issy basically confirmed that your plan was working, you were hoping he’d be more confused or upset about you ignoring him, but anger would work too.

You finished your breakfast with Issy and Mia, the three of you leaving the Great hall together, all whilst successfully keeping the gaze, well glare of your boyfriend on you whilst you yourself didn’t spare him a single glance.

You weren’t even two steps out of the great hall when you feel a hand wrap around your wrist and pull you away from your friends. Yelping, you whip around to see a fuming blonde Slytherin leading you towards one of the court yards. You yanked your arm out of his grip as soon as you’d both stopped walking. “You know, you could’ve asked me nicely to follow you?”

“Why have you been avoiding me since last night? You didn’t respond to my letters and you ate at your own table. You haven’t even looked at me! Is everything okay? Has something happened?” You almost scoffed at the sincerity in his words. This was the same boy that had been saying how much he hated having you around all the time, surely the last 12 hours had been bliss for him.

You acted nonchalant, “Oh, I’ve just been busy. I am a student Draco. I have something called homework that needs to be done.”

Clearly, he was not very impressed by your response but neither of you really wanted to create a scene in front of the whole school. “Come on, I’ll walk you to class.” Draco was just reaching for you hand when you pulled away, as if his touch burned you. The look of hurt that shot across his eyes almost broke your resolve, almost. “It’s okay! Mia and Issy are waiting for me, besides, your lesson is across the castle. I’ll see you later okay!” And with that you turned and ran towards you lesson, leaving Draco staring after you dumbfounded.

It wasn’t until dinner that evening that you saw Draco again, this time, he was the one to surprise you. His bright blonde hair and green robes certainly stood out like a sore thumb in the sea of Y/H/C robes. And if that wasn’t the dead giveaway, the hushed whispers and glances from literally every other student in his direction was.

“Uh, Draco, not that I don’t love seeing you, but why are you at my table? We usually sit at Slytherin’s. You know my house tolerates you but they’re not… overly fond of you.” The last part you made sure only he heard.

“You’ve avoided me all day and all of last night. Can’t I be worried about my own girlfriend?” And as that signature cocky smirk of his stretched across his face, you knew you had lost.

That was until Cedric Diggory sat down next to you.

You were old family friends, everyone knew that, and he was always the one thing you could count on Draco being jealous of 100% of the time, no matter how small the interaction. Which is why you proceeded to throw yourself onto him and scream “I’ve missed you so much!! We have to go to The Three Broomsticks this weekend, I want to know how my favourite seeker is doing.” And you threw in a no-so-subtle wink to really rub salt into the wound.

Which… lead to you being thrown over a certain blonde’s shoulder and carried out of the great hall. You had two choices, let Draco carry you out and talk this through like any other normal couple, or… scream bloody murder and run away. You were a second too late to execute your plan however, he’d already walked the both of you straight into the room of requirement. “Uh Draco, what were you thinking of when summoned the room? Why is there only a bed and a fireplace?”

He sat down on the bed, pulling you to stand between his legs; his face was flushed a deep pink, it was adorable. “I just wanted a place to talk, I swear. Besides, I never heard you complain sex before.” God you wanted to punch the stupid smirk off his face.

“Oh my god Draco!” You really weren’t winning anymore; you were putty in his hands again.

“So princess, wanna tell me why you’ve been distant all day?” He had a hand under your chin now, the other holding your waist to keep you from moving. God you had missed his hands on you.

“I told you, I’ve just been busy. Besides we’ve spent so much time together recently, I’m sure you enjoyed the break.” You placed your hands on his shoulders, allowing yourself to lean down to drop a peck on his lips.

“Love what are you talking about?? When would I ever not want to spend time with you?”

By now you had your head resting on top of his, exhausted of having to keep up this façade around him. You missed his touch more than you had thought. This was pathetic, you couldn’t keep yourself together for even 24 hours. Was your resolve this weak?

“Tell me what’s wrong darling. Is it Potter? I swear to God- “

“No, it wasn’t Potter, sit your ass down Malfoy. Honestly you should just date him instead, you sure talk about him enough.” You weren’t sure whether to cry or laugh at this point.

“For the sake of our relationship I’m just going to pretend that you didn’t just suggest that I date Potter.” His hands reached up to cup your face, forcing you to make eye contact. “Now do you want to tell be why you can’t even look me in the eyes? Did I do something?”

You could cry at this point; how was this the same boy you saw compare you to a leech and insulted you to his friends? Was this just a game to him? Did he even love you or was this all just one big joke to him? You hadn’t realised how long you’d been lost in your own thoughts until Draco hooked his hands under your thighs and pulled you onto his lap, bringing your attention back his piercing grey eyes.

“I heard you. Last night. I came up to your room to see you, but you were in there with Blaise and Notts and I heard everything. I heard you talk shit about me to your them, do you hate being with me that much? Did you even love me at all? Or is this just one big game to you?” He had kept his eyes on you the entire time whilst yours had fallen to your lap, voice trembling. Your heart thundered in your chest as the heavy silence drew on, quickly becoming unbearable. You had hoped this entire time that it was just one big misunderstanding, that Draco would say you misheard. Yet the long-drawn silence was enough to make your heart drop to your stomach.

You set your arms on his shoulders, prepared to push yourself to stand up out of his hold, ready to sprint out the door to break down once in the comfort of your own dorm room. But just as you raised yourself from his lap, Draco’s arms wrapped tightly around your waist, keeping you in place on his lap. His right hand then reaching up to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear before bringing his mouth up to meet yours. You savoured the feeling, of his soft lips on yours, of the minty taste of him on your tongue; knowing it may be the last one you two would ever share. That thought alone was enough for the tears to start flowing, your kiss turning salty as your tears flowed heavier to the point where sobs broke out from your lips, breaking the kiss. You buried you head in your hands, trying to control the sobs wracking your body as Draco cradled you to him, guiding your head to rest in the crook of his neck.

Your hands gripped the back of his shirt, sobbing heavily into the white cotton as he ran his hands over your back and squeezed you tight. It wasn’t until you had managed to calm your sobs into quiet hiccups that he spoke up, his voice quiet and calm compared to how your thundering heart and uneven breaths.

“I’m so sorry. I never meant for you to hear that- no, I shouldn’t have said it in the first place. I didn’t mean anything I said, I swear to you, I love you so much and I would never do anything to hurt you. You’ve changed me for the better, you know you have. After getting this hideous mark on my arm, you have been the only thing that has kept me sane. The only thing that has tethered me to this world. I will never forgive myself for saying those words, even if it was just to keep up my image for Blaise and Notts. I love you. I love you. I love you.” He kept repeating the same three words. He whispered sweet nothings into your ears, begging for you forgiveness, trying to prove his love to you.

You had stopped crying altogether at this point, you simply relaxed into his hold, listening to his words and his heartbeat. From the second he opened his mouth you had already forgiven him; you’d never heard him sound so… raw before. Sure, you’d had emotional talks before, but you’d never heard him sound so scared, scared that he’d lose you.

You stood up from his lap and watched as his face fell, the colour draining from his face as he prepared for you to leave him then and there. Instead you reached for his hands, pulling him to stand in front of you. “Promise you’ll never put me through this again?”

“I will spend the rest of my life making sure you never question my love for you ever again. I-I never wanted to hurt you; I would never purposely do so.”

“I believe you.” And with that you wrapped your hands around his neck, pulling him in for a breath-taking kiss.

He pulled back from you, breaking the kiss only to say, “What a couple me make huh?” This had you giggling into the kiss as he claimed your lips as quickly as he had let them go. Luckily you had the room of requirement to… spend time together in. (let’s just say the both of you were very thankful for the bed)

Things didn’t immediately go back to normal again after that, Draco was a very private individual, so it took some time for him to learn that he didn’t have to hold up a façade around people who truly cared about him, and for him to not insult those he looked for the sake of his image. But once he got past that, the two of you would become unbreakable, your trust in one another running deep.

Voldemort would come and try to corrupt Draco, but Draco would stay by your side, fighting for Hogwarts despite the allegiance to Voldemort permanently scarred onto his skin. He would come back for his 8th year and build friendships with people he never thought he would, even being able to speak to the Golden Trio without grimacing or insulting them.

And as you laid in your bed on a cold winter night some 15 years from here, your son in between the two of you having crawled into your bed after having a nightmare, you knew you were content to spend the rest of your life just like this. That you would go through everything again in a heartbeat to end up where you are now.

#A/N: I am so sorry for this ending, I didn't really like how it ended but changed it like 20 times and this was the one that didn't make me want to burn the entire thing so I hope you enjoyed it!

Add yourself to my taglist!

#draco #draco malfoy #draco x reader #Draco Malfoy x reader #draco fic #Draco Malfoy fanfiction #Harry Potter #Harry Potter fic #Draco x y/n #slytherin #draco one shot #draco malfoy one shot #Draco Malfoy imagine

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tsukishimas-shortcake · 3 years

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Relationship Headcanons

↦ Character(s): Hakkai Shiba x fem!reader

↦ Rating/Warning: No rating though there are some light mentions of abuse (if you have read the manga you are aware of what I am talking about, I’m not going very deep into it though it literally just mentions it), mentions of anxiety attacks (no detail though), fluff, not proof read

↦ Word count: 1.8k (longer than planned, sections are bolded)

↦ Your Momo’s Receipt: Hello~ I’m post yet another TR headcanon and this was requested by the lovely @strawbub I hope this doesn’t disappoint, it did get longer than planned but I enjoyed writing it. I'll prob do a part two that's more of a scenario based on your first date or something since I didn't go into it here. Please note: for those of you who don’t know my blog is currently under construction, meaning I will not be updating my masterlist for the time being.

So how did you guys meet, well mostly because of Yuzuha,

One day in like elementary you’re walking home and you see this super pretty middle school girl just like yelling at this small group of guys

The guys end up running off just because they don’t wanna deal with her or the attention she's drawn to them

Behind her was a boy, taller than her but obviously younger. You didn’t assume they knew eachother though.

The boy and yuzuha began walking in opposite directions because one was going home while the other was going to pick up something like groceries

You’re so entranced by how she stood up to them yet she’s a girl who was far smaller and you end up catching up to her, almost stepping on her heels

You end up absent mindedly following her into the grocery store and eventually she just freezes, turns, and stare directly at you

Your eyes widen since you must’ve been staring and she just goes “may I ask why you’re following me?” And you explain how cool she was earlier. She invites you over for dinner (esp since her older brother won’t be home) and figured it’d be good for Hakkai to meet someone his age

You end up going over but Hakkai didn’t come down to eat so you never actually got to meet him, though from then on you would see Yuzuha every so often, visit every other weekend or so

But no matter how often you came over the next few months, you never once met hakkai,

That was until you both reached the end of your middle school education and we’re about to begin high school

You had gone over because you were going to borrow an old work book from Yuzuha, and when you go to knock on the door the door opens before your closed fist could hit it, instead hitting a firm chest

You blush and quickly apologize but the person in front of you doesn’t move at all, doesn’t say anything and almost looks like they drifted into space with their dead stare

You assume this is yuzuha’s older brother because you’ve also never met him and you immediately turn to walk away but Yuzuha calls over hakkai’s shoulder

“Y/N-Chan! You just got here where are you going?” This was def not yuzuha’s older brother. There’s no way she’d be that happy with him around; oh my god. Realization hit, the guy who you hit (though it was more of a tap) was hakkai.

The hakkai you had only caught a glimpse of in yuzuha’s photos, never talked to or actually seen in person despite going to the same school and living in the same neighborhood

He must hate you. That’s why he avoids you. That’s def why - is what you think

Yuzuha drags hakkai back inside and invites you in; you sit down with them in the living room and watch hakkai visibly relax now that he’s inside his house, his own space, with a pillow behind him and a blanket covering his lower half, he almost curls up into it as he continues to avoid your stare

“Hi hakkai…Kun? Im L/N Y/N” you say and you see his face dead pan once again

Yuzuha can be heard laughing from the kitchen as she comes back in.

She leans over and begins explaining that hakkai literally just freezes with any interaction between him and girls who aren’t in his family

You nod, thinking maybe it’s an anxiety thing? Which is the case with you, but only because he’s been watching you since you’ve come over (not in a creepy way) wanting to and working the courage up to talk to you

The 5th or so time you came over after that encounter he was inches away from introducing himself before the house phone rang causing everyone to kind of “wake up” in a sense

Every time since then he gets closer and closer but isn’t able to say anything; he even realizes he has a crush on you.

The way you sit when you do homework and how cute you look when you’re focused.

How your forehead scrunches up when you’re trying to figure something out and you end up just sitting back with a small huff followed by yuzuha’s signature laughter.

It’s also a huge thing that you get along with Yuzuha.

So enough with first meeting time for the confession.

He ends up confessing accidentally. He didn’t know you were coming over to begin with so he was flustered out of his mind. And how was he supposed to know you hadn’t actually fallen asleep and you could hear him over the tv

The tv was more white noise than anything and the day was hot since it was the middle of summer causing the window to be open and the sound of soft wind and small birds to drift in; this was the hot that makes you tired so you were all sprawled out of just sitting in a daze

So while resting your head on the table you’re dozing in and out but then you hear hakkai begin to speak, something he never really did around you

Now did you and hakkai text? Yes. Did it take him an hour to reply because his brain would explode when you replied to him? Yes. But was it a start to communication? Also a yes.

You hear him say your name quietly before he moved closer, you can feel his gaze on your features

“I like you” is all he says. Simple and sweet. But you sit there in shock, trying not to blush so he’ll have no idea you heard him but he can tell because your forehead scrunches

You heard him and are focused on if you should reply or not. And he knows that.

You open your eyes and just look up at him, he’s closer than expected. His hand close to yours on the floor and he reaches over and grabs it lightly. Hoping you’ll also return the gesture by holding his hand instead of leaving your hand limp inside his.

And you do, thank goodness, and Hakkai almost mentally can’t handle it.

Once you start dating it’s more so just hanging out at his house or yours; however he talks a bit more and you text a lot more. He’s gotten better at replying. It usually takes him like 15 minutes now

He’s kinda stressed about your relationship but not due to anything you or him did

He’s stressed because of the mentality his older brother gave him

Is he even allowed to be this happy?

He finally has someone thats small enough and naive enough that he can protect you; compared to constantly being protected it’s a sudden, strong, yet good change for him

He’s touch s t a r v e d

Yes Yuzuha shows affection; but he stopped accepting her hugs when he was around 8 just because he physically wasn’t able to handle it due to his bruises and such

But with you, even with his bruises and all you take care of him. Able to coax him into using medicines and toning down the physical violence (that he can control himself)

He also finds it super soothing when you lightly brush over his scars (especially those that his brother gave him), it helps him believe that scars are only physical and can fade with help

One thing that stresses him out the most is trying to hide you from his brother. Any time you leave something at the house its easy to pass it off as yuzuha's but when it comes to things like photos he has with you, he can't hang them up, show them off, or have them as his phone Lock Screen, etc. because he just really doesn't want his brother to know and target you since he'll then know that you're his weakness (aside from yuzuha as well)

Sometimes won't explain why he can't hang out and has legit pushed you out of his house before at the last minute notice of his brother coming home

Will always make sure you get home safe though, usually by having Yuzuha go with you since then she can just say you're a friend from school

Your parents love him, though they were a bit hesitant it became a "you always have a place to stay" because they learned about their family situation from you and yuzuha. So expect him to spend the night when he's too scared to deal with his brother. Same with yuzuha. (yes I know this isn't yuzuha head canons but its hard to write for him without mentioning her when they're so close)

We're talking three person sleep overs. Yuzuha and you of course share the bed and Hakkai takes some time to even set foot in your room much less sleep on a mattress that's on the floor

He has a small heart attack every time he comes into your room because he's overwhelmed with everything, he's never been so comfortable and it makes him feel restless. Like he's never and I mean n e v e r been less stressed and slept better than when he does so in your room

The smell, the colors, just being surrounded by you is something that completely changes his mood

Once showed up after he fought with his brother, tears in his eyes and clothes a bit tattered and you just pulled him to your room, and sat down with him.

You laid on your bed with him laying down onto of you, head on your chest as you rubbed his head and only said a few words "its not your fault"

He ends up crying so hard he falls asleep and gets dehydrated and you have to make him drink a bunch of water when he finally wakes up.

NSFW

super fucking careful w you

almost annoyingly so, but you're understanding

He knows that he might be taking things frustratingly slow but he knows that since you understand and know his history that you can help him get through it

Your first time you think you'll have to call it off because he's shaking so bad

"baby... are you sure it won't hurt you?" he keeps asking.

pretty sure that's the longest its ever taken him to finish because he was so anxious

despite being so slow and hesitant, late he isn't too scared to get a bit rougher

but im not talking anything crazy im talking like he's willing to pull your hair a bit or nip a bit harder at your neck.

Please never ask him to do anything like degrade you or some type of harsh physical rough shit, he can't

like literally im 99% sure that if you ask him to choke you or something he will pass out because of the anxiety attack he would have at even the thought.

in short with nsfw though he is sweet boy. He's a switch through and through. Loves when you take care of everything because then he doesn't have to be scared of hurting you.

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heylookitsyc · 3 years

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Bad Breaks and Pancake Dates

Pairing: 2p!Canada/Matt Williams x Reader

Anime: Hetalia / 2p!Hetalia

Genre: Angst/Fluff

Synopsis: Your boyfriend (well, now ex-boyfriend) left you out in the rain, and your older brother Philippines is stuck in a World Meeting between the first and second player countries. He asks Canada’s second player to come get you, seemingly unaware of the Canadian’s little crush on you.

Warning(s): Swearing, slight mentions of a toxic/unhealthy relationship

Note: Just a reminder that none of you deserve to be in an unhealthy relationship !! You all deserve to be happy, and I wish you all nothing but happiness and good health in your lives (´･ᴗ･ ` ) please enjoy!

Story is down below!

You hugged yourself in a weak attempt to stay warm, the trees above you doing little to defend you from the rain.

It was difficult to tell if the drops running down your cheeks were from your own tears or the rain. You didn’t expect it to rain; it was supposed to be a fun day out with your boyfriend, so you had dressed in some of your best attire. Unfortunately, it did little to protect you from the rain.

After breaking it off with you, your asshole of a now ex-boyfriend had left you off at the side of the road. He had responded to your protests with a few not so kind words before driving off, leaving you to stand outside in the cold.

Your phone rang, and with slightly numb fingers you managed to press the “answer” button before holding it up to your ear.

You were met with Matt’s gruff voice. “Hey, where are you?”

“I don’t know,” you said weakly. “There aren’t any street signs nearby.”

“Can you send me your location?”

“I think so.”

“Alright.” You heard the sound of a vehicle starting up. “I’ll be there in a few minutes. Your brother sent me to come get you.”

“Oh. Thanks, Matt.”

He simply gave a small grunt in response before hanging up, leaving you to yourself once more.

You stared out the window mindlessly. Music played from the radio, the volume too low for you to know what kind of tune it was. Matt had given you a spare sweatshirt that he had in the backseat of his car; you noticed that it was the same sweatshirt that you had given to him one Christmas. You could smell the faint scent of maple syrup and cigarette smoke coming from the article of clothing.

A small smile formed on your lips. You remember how Matt was when you had given him the sweatshirt; his face had become a bright red, muttering something about how stupid your gift was. He had said that he would never wear such a thing, but that obviously turned out to be a lie.

Matt suddenly cleared his throat, bringing you out of your thoughts.

“So what happened?” he asked. Though he sounded uninterested, the glance he gave you showed the complete opposite. “You were crying when I arrived.”

You felt your cheeks warm at his statement. “You noticed that?”

“Of course I did. You don’t usually look that unhappy.”

“I guess.” You fiddled with the sweatshirt, taking notice of how the sleeves fell well past your fingertips. With a small sigh, you decided to tell him. “My boyfriend broke up with me.”

You didn’t notice the way that Matt’s grip on the steering wheel tightened, eyes narrowing behind his dark shades.

“Are you fucking serious?”

You were caught off guard by the Canadian’s response. You felt the anger radiating off of him, and it started to make you nervous.

“Yeah, I am,” you said, tugging on the sweatshirt sleeve now. “He broke it off when we were coming back from the movies. He parked somewhere, and he…”

You suddenly went quiet, letting out a shaky breath.

“He wanted to do some things,” you went on, after a few seconds had passed. “I told him I wasn’t ready for that stuff just yet. He kept trying to convince me, and eventually he got angry and… well, we broke up.”

You felt your throat tighten, and you realized that you were now close to crying again. You felt a small nudge on your hand, and you looked down to see that while Matt still had one hand on the wheel, the other was now holding out a handkerchief.

As if sensing your confusion, Matt gave a small sound of annoyance. “What?”

“Nothing!” You quickly took the piece of cloth from him. “Thanks, Matt.”

“Do you wanna eat somewhere?” he suddenly asked. You didn’t know if you were seeing things, but you could’ve sworn that there was a faint blush on his cheeks. “We can talk more about this over dinner or something.”

You felt yourself smile at his words.

“Sure.”

The sweet taste of maple syrup filled your mouth as you took a bite of pancake. Matt had taken you to a local diner that he visited quite often; despite his initial plan to take you somewhere nicer, you had been quick to remember his love for pancakes. (“I haven’t had breakfast for dinner in awhile,” you had told him. “Let’s go get pancakes so that the both of us can enjoy!”).

“You know, I don’t eat pancakes often,” you said, “but these are great. Thanks for taking me here, Matt.”

“Don’t mention it.” He took a sip of his coffee, his attention on the stack of pancakes in front of you.

You took notice of his stare, head tilting slightly. “Do you want some?” you asked.

“I’m fine.”

In reality, he just couldn’t bring himself to look you in the eye. It didn’t help that he was so close to you; the two of you were sitting right across from each other, and he could feel your gaze on him as he spoke. It made him feel strange, to say the least.

The diner was mostly empty. A small number of tables were filled; it seemed as though some people also had the idea of having breakfast for dinner. It was mostly quiet, save for the double doors leading to the kitchen occasionally swinging about and the faint chatter coming from the few customers that interacted with one another.

“I still don’t understand why you didn’t order anything,” you said, stabbing another piece of pancake onto your fork. “You love pancakes, Matt.”

“I’m good with my coffee,” he said. He was about to take another sip of his drink, only to pause when you held out a piece of pancake to him.

“Here,” you said, smiling. “You can share with me.”

He stared at you in shock, the lack of shades allowing you to look into his violet eyes.

“Come on, Matt,” you urged. “I can’t finish these on my own, anyway.”

Knowing that you wouldn’t stop unless he gave in, he gave a small grumble before reluctantly opening his mouth. His cheeks were now a faint pink, and you couldn’t help but feel your own cheeks warm as you fed him the bite.

“I put extra maple syrup on that one,” you said. “I know how much you like that stuff.” You gave a small laugh at your own words, remembering that Matt had also poured some syrup into his coffee when he thought you weren’t looking.

A comfortable silence fell between the two of you as you continued to eat, occasionally giving Matt a bite in between his sips of coffee.

Heavy footsteps followed your own as you made your way up the front porch steps. Your brother had rented the house for a month; while the world meeting was held in Canada and only lasted for a day, he had rented the home for a month so that the two of you would have more time to explore the country.

“Thanks for today, Matt,” you said, reaching the front door. “I had fun.”

The Canadian stood at the bottom of the steps, not bothering to make his way up entirely. It was already late; he had to leave soon in order to avoid a lecture from Oliver once he got home.

Hands shoved into his pockets, Matt gave a small nod at your words.

“Get home safe, okay?” you said. “And message me when you do. I want to make sure you get home safely.”

You really were too nice. He watched as you took out a key from your pocket, unlocking the front door.

Matt couldn’t stop himself. “Hey, (Y/N)?”

“Hm?” You had been halfway inside already, and you turned to look at him. “What is it?”

“Your ex-boyfriend,” he said. “Forget about him, okay? He was a fucking asshole.” He looked off the side, and even in the dark you could see his slight blush. “You deserve someone better. Someone who’ll do things when you’re comfortable.”

“Matt…”

He didn’t have time to react as you made your way back down the steps, grabbing him by the front of his flannel in order to pull him down. He felt a slight pressure on his cheek, and his eyes widened at the realization that you had kissed him.

“Thank you,” you said softly.

He couldn’t do anything but stare as you let go of his shirt and headed back up the stairs, giving him a small wave before disappearing into the house.

After a few seconds of standing there, Matt shook his head and began to make his leave, unaware of the fact that he now held a slight smile.

[Bonus]

“Ha! I knew it!”

“Kuya...”

Your older brother gulped at the sound of your voice, turning around slowly. He had been watching the two of you from his bedroom window.

You stood there, a smile on your face. Though your smile was usually sweet, the way you stared at him sent shivers down his spine.

“Were you watching us?” you asked.

Your brother gave a nervous laugh in response. “Aha, (Y/N), you know-” He didn’t get a chance to finish his sentence, for you had already thrown a slipper at his face.

“Mind your own business next time!” you huffed, ignoring his groans of pain and weak apologies as you headed towards your room.

Translations:

Kuya - older boy/older brother

#axis powers hetalia #hetalia #2ptalia #2p!hetalia #2p hetalia #2p canada #2p!canada #2p canada x reader #canada x reader #2p!canada x reader #matt williams #matthew williams

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gotnofucks · 3 years

Note

What do you think Lee or other Seb and Chris characters would be like with a tall, slim and very uncurvy woman? Like only a couple of inches shorter than them, and she never feels feminine enough or sexy enough for them?

We'll start this by establishing that every person is pretty regardless of their body type. Tall, short, chubby or skinny, different complexion and smooth or furry.

As a short girl, this is for my tall skinny sisters who have a difficult time loving themselves:

Warning: sometimes dark themes, allusions to smut, possessiveness, body image issues, breeding kink, 18+ ONLY

+++++

Steve Rogers: The Avengers Charity ball was a big event and though Steve hated the public attention, he's excited to do this with you. You've been dating a few months and coming out in public was something Steve was looking forward to.

He had decorated your neck with marks to show the world who you belonged to. The territorial captain was itching to claim you in front of the world when you told him you'd rather not go.

"What?" He asked, "Why not?"

You bit your lip, shifting on your feet as you looked at him.

"It's nothing...just don't feel like it" You mumbled.

"Is it because we're going to fast? You don't wanna tell the world about us?" Steve asked and you frantically shook your head.

"No, Stevie." You took a deep breath. "It's just...you're Captain America. The people expect you to be with a womanly woman, someone who complements you. I am...me. Tall, not large enough boobs, my ass is skinny and -"

You would have went on had Steve not pulled you in by your waist and crushed your mouth to his. You kissed back, running your hand through his soft hair before he pulled back, panting.

"Are you kidding me? You're listing everything I love about you. I don't have to bend down to kiss you, you breasts feel perfect in my hands and that ass? Baby, that ass is so perfect if people knew the thoughts I get when I see it, they'll douse me with holy water. Captain America doesn't need a womanly woman to compliment him. You’re not my arm candy, I am yours because you’re the perfect one. You get me?"

Choked up with tears you nod, letting him tuck your head in his neck.

Bucky Barnes: He's been looking at you for weeks, just the way you've been looking at him. During training, he makes sure to stay behind you, correcting your posture by putting his hands on you.

For someone who'd lived more than a century, Bucky Barnes had no patience anymore and he promptly sat down his ass in front of you, making you stop mid-chew.

"Why haven't you asked me out on a date yet?" He asked you, the red Henley he wore stretching across his broad chest. You swallowed quickly, sputtering.

"Sargent?" You squeaked, unprepared to be accosted like this.

"I want you, you want me. We've practically been eye fucking each other for months. Why haven't you asked me out yet?" He snapped.

You bite your lip before wetting them with your tongue, unsure how to say this.

"You...you don't wanna go out with some other agent? Maybe Shally?" You asked and winced when he scowled at you. "I'm only saying this 'cause she has you know, a better body. She's...prettier?"

In this moment you realised how scared Bucky's enemies may feel on the battlefield because the expression on his face had you terrified. And turned on.

"You fucking with me doll? I don't want her. I love your body. You're almost my height, think of how easy 69-ing would be! You're perfect in every way. The way you kick those men's asses in the gym...fuck I always need a cold shower after that."

Your mouth dropped open and a small smile lit your face.

"So, you don't mind me being strong and lean and not... feminine?" You asked tentatively and Bucky smirked.

"Come into the bedroom with me and I'll show you how feminine you can be" He challenged.

Really, who were you to say no to him.

Ransom Drysdale: Heels. He got you fucking 6-inch heels. You were nearly his height, already being taunted by your friends for this. And he got you heels.

"Ransom, take them back. You know I don't do heels." You say and he scoffs, pushing them back at you.

"Like shit you don't do them. I want to see you in them, and wear that lingerie I got you." He orders and you frown.

"No Ransom, I just - I don't like them." You said and he turned away from his phone to raise an eyebrow at you.

"I've seen you eyeing that flimsy scarp of fabric for weeks in the mall. You like it, now wear it for me so I can admire it on you." He said.

You finger the delicate material of the bra and panty and wondered how amazing it would feel against your skin. But then you looked at the small size and squeezed your eyes shut. There was a reason you insisted Ransom turn off the lights when you fucked.

"I like them. Just...not on me" You whispered. A finger pulled your chin up and you met Ransom's blue eyes, his gorgeous face peering into you like you were the dumbest person he knew.

"The fuck?" He asked, a warning growl in his tone that had you rubbing your legs.

"Ransom...I'm...not made for these. These heels, I'll be taller than you. I don't have the body to make this gorgeous lingerie come to life. You...I don't want you to see me like that." You say, almost tearing up.

Ransom looked livid for a moment before he gently stood you up, shushing your protests as he one by one stripped you naked. You looked down, ashamed of yourself as he forced you into the tall heels, his head now below yours.

"Look at me" He rasped and you obeyed. His eyes went from your head to down, appreciatively over your breasts and flat stomach and then to the vee between your thighs.

"You're perfect." He said, head dipping only a little to suck a nipple in his mouth. "Perfect figure, perfect face, perfect height. You're the only perfect thing I have in my fucked up life."

You put your hands on his shoulder to stable your wobbling feet, and he held you close.

"Wear this lingerie. I want to tear it off your body with my teeth. And the lights stay on today."

Lee Bodecker: You pushed down on your skirt again, hiding your thin legs the best you could. The demure and pretty girls in the neighborhood snickered as you passed by them, their necklines supporting a beautiful cleavage.

You walked into your home and quickly got to making the dinner. While you didn't look like a normal lady, you were one. You could cook and clean and your daddy hoped that would be enough to get you married and off his hands.

You got dressed for you knew there would be guests tonight and tied your apron around your narrow waist, serving the food on the table for your father and the Sheriff. He came in his uniform, the hat set down on the table and eyes that followed you.

It was no surprise when he cornered you later after your father was drunk and passed out. His hardness dug into you, sweet breath on your face and nose rubbing against yours.

"Where you been all day sweetheart?" He asked, hands groping you like they'd done a thousand times before. You whimpered, tilting your head to allow him access to your neck.

"Shopping for the dinner. Daddy doesn't like stale food." You say and Lee bites you.

"What've I told you about calling him daddy in front of me? I'm the only daddy ya need." He scolded. You waited for his kiss, lips puckered when he stilled. His hands were on your breasts and he paused, reaching inside despite your protests to pull out the rolled up cloth inside.

"What the fuck is this?" He angrily asked and you hid your face in embarrassment. You were tired of having small breasts, tired of not being as pretty as others.

"Just..I wanted more meat on me." You said sullenly and Lee twisted his face in a scowl, pulling you forward with your hair.

"You're not doing this shit again. You want big fucking breasts then ask me to put a baby in you and I will. You want more meat on your body then I'll fuck a child in you right now. You get me?" He snarled and you nodded, clinging to him.

"I...I am sorry. I wanted to be pretty for you." You sob and Lee pulls you closer, taking your hands and pressing them in his belly.

"Sweetheart, you are fuckin' gorgeous. My pretty girl. Daddy's best girl. You don't need more meat. I already got enough for both of us. Kay?" He asked and kissed you deep.

Andy Barber: You hid your insecurities well. Andy didn't give you a reason to have many. He loved you, you knew that. But sometimes, you wondered if he'd have preferred a more bountiful booty to hold at night.

When you tried to eat a little extra than your stomach permitted and puked the next day, he sat you down and asked point blank what was wrong. It was difficult to lie to him, not only because he was a great lawyer but because Andy knew you too well to not know when you're hiding something.

"I wanted to gain some weight I suppose." You said. Andy titled his head, eyes going over your body before he frowned.

"But you're perfect" He said, as if confused. "You can't overeat baby. Talk to me, what's wrong?"

You bit your lip. Dating Andy was daunting. He was someone who had lines of woman waiting to warm his bed. You were surprised when he asked you out, you of all the other softer women. You, your flat figure of the other hourglass ones.

He was an alpha, he was the master. He would have looked so good next to a timid, tiny girl who would easily fold into his body for warmth. And yet, here he was with you.

"I have long legs" You blurted and didn't look at him. "I am taller than almost all women here, I don't have a plump ass you can bounce quarters off and definitely not a chest that is spilling out. I don't know Andy, I...I am not enough I guess."

You wanted to cry after admitting this and maybe you would have had Andy not knelt before you and cupped your face to kiss you deeply.

"Oh honey, you silly thing. You're more than enough. Absolutely stunning." He whispered. He trailed his hands up from your ankle to your thighs and you stifled a moan.

"Your legs are long, and I love them. So much length to run my tongue on" He continued. "You ass may not bounce quarters, but it bounces my balls well when I'm fucking your from behind. And your breasts better not be spilling anywhere, they are mine. The only thing they need to spill is either my seed or the milk that'll be in there after I breed you. You understand?"

Heat rose up from your chest to your neck and ears, eyes watering with love and desire. You put your long legs on Andy's shoulder and hugged him with your thighs, asking him softly to show you his praises again.

#steve rogers x reader #bucky barnes x reader #ransom drysdale x reader #lee bodecker x reader #andy barber x reader #steve x reader #bucky x reader #ransom x reader #lee x reader #andy x reader #steve Rogers #bucky barnes #ransom drysdale #lee bodecker #hoedecker club #andy barber

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liberty-barnes · 4 years

Text

The Swear Jar

Part 1 of The Jar Series

Mob Boss!Tom Holland x Single Mom!Reader

Prompt: “I've never said a single fucking swear word in my whole damn life”

Warnings: swearing obviously, Tom’s a mob boss so there’s that, there’s like, one sexual innuendo but also ??? not really??? idk

Word Count: 4k (i really need to learn to write short things)

Estimated Reading Time: 16 minutes

A/N: It’s the pic guys, I can’t help it.

Edit: Wow, you guys actually liked this! So since many of you asked, a part will be coming out soon, maybe more, we’ll see. So if you wanna be added to my “The Swear Jar” Taglist, just ask me or add yourself directly through the link in my bio!

Main Masterlist || Series Masterlist

The bell above the door to the diner chimed and you perked up, smiling brightly at the young teenage couple.

“Gracie! Stella! It’s so good to see you again!”

The girls greeted you with the same amount of enthusiasm and proceeded to order their usual meal.

“Your hair’s really pretty Stella! You look like a mermaid now!”

“Thanks, Millie! I took your advice and went with blue instead of purple.”

The young girl smiled and captured the couple’s attention by showcasing her current work in progress.

Millicent Rose (Y/l/n) was your five-year-old daughter. She had brown hair, falling on her shoulders in nice large curls, and big (y/e/c) eyes, a perfect match to yours. She loved drawing (the diner walls were crawling with her masterpieces) and pretty hair, especially if it was soft.

Her bubbly and fearless personality sometimes frightened you, but you mostly came to terms with the fact that your daughter was a social butterfly and took full advantage of the small diner to interact with as many people as she could.

You watched with a fond smile as Millie explained what she had been drawing to the girls, mentioning every little detail while they praised her good work. The young brunette had a gift to make anyone love her.

Soon enough, their large milkshake to share was finished and Lou, the owner and cook, was all done with the food so the girls sat down at a booth and Millie went back to drawing, little feet dangling off the chair and little brows furrowed in concentration.

As you were refiling Mr and Mrs Lee’s drinks, the bell chimed once more and four men walked in dressed in stylish suits, much too fancy for this place. They sat down at a booth and started talking while you took a deep calming breath.

Oh, fuck me.

You took your notepad and walked over to them, a much too fake smile on your face.

“Good morning gentlemen, what can I get you?”

The table quieted down and you made eye contact with who you knew to be the leader.

“I’ll have a burger with fries and a strawberry milkshake.”

One of the twins said.

“I’ll have the same but with a chocolate milkshake instead.”

The other one added.

“Vegi burger and a coke, please.”

At least the blonde one had some manners.

Your eyes lifted from the notepad to the leader once again.

“And for you?”

You did your best to ignore the slight tremble in your voice.

“Bacon cheeseburger, fries and a coke, darling.”

“Right away.”

You got out of there as soon as possible, sparing a glance at your daughter to make sure she was still sitting at the counter before entering the kitchen with a panicked expression on your face.

“Lou…”

“Yeah, sweetheart?”

“You’ve got an order… for the Hollands…”

“Well, shit.”

The Holland family was the oldest and most successful mob in London, extremely rich, dangerous, and seemingly untouchable.

Harry and Sam Holland, the twins, were rumoured to have been behind the Burtons’ death, another famous family known for drug trafficking and other crimes.

Harrison Osterfield, the second in command, was a close family friend, accused of drug trafficking, illegal weapons selling, and other such crimes, though the charges all dropped before the first hearing even took place.

And finally, Thomas Holland, the leader. Arrested for multiple murders, arson, extortion, and a long list of other felonies, but never convicted.

Everyone was scared of them, and the fact that they were eating here was not good for business.

You ignored the tightness in your chest in favour of helping Lou prepare their food, hoping to do it as fast as possible so the group could leave.

Meanwhile, at the booth, Tom was rolling his eyes at his brothers and friend’s stupidity.

“Okay, we get it, she’s hot, but you don’t have to talk about it all the fucking time.”

Millie turned her head in their direction and scowled. She stretched a bit to the other side of the counter to take the transparent jar and got down from her chair, making her way to their booth, stomping a bit, which made her Sketchers light up.

The diner watched with curious (and slightly frightened, for the Lees) eyes as the little girl climbed onto the booth next to Harrison, one leg after the other, and kneeled next to the blonde, setting her elbow on the table and stretching so the transparent jar was now sitting in front of Tom.

He looked at it: a lid-less mason jar with a pink bow and right in the front, in a child’s handwriting and pink glittery letters were the words 'Swear Jar’.

“You owe a pound.”

He lifted his head to look at the girl.

“I beg your pardon?”

“When someone says a bad word they have to put a pound in the jar. You said a bad word so you owe a pound.”

“I’ve never said a single fucking swear word in my whole damn life!”

“That’s two more so you have to put three pounds in.”

“Yeah, Tom, put the money in.”

Harrison had his arms around the girl and a smug smile on his face, evidently taking a liking to the young brunette.

“Shut the fuck up Haz, you curse more than I do!”

“Four.”

“Shit.”

That one was not on purpose.

“Five.”

“Okay, okay, jeez, hold on.”

He took out his wallet and took his only five-dollar bill amid all the hundreds.

“Just gonna put the money in this stupid jar.”

“Six.”

“Wha- stupid’s not a swear word!”

“I’m not allowed to say it so yes, it is.”

Tom rummaged around his wallet for a stray pound, reluctantly putting a hundred in after finding nothing.

“Does that mean I’m allowed to say ninety-nine swear words?”

“No paying in advance, everything that’s not the money you owe is a donation.”

“To what foundation?”

“The ‘get Millie new glitter pens’ foundation”

She answered with a smirk and everyone -bar Tom- was pretty much crying at seeing their boss be told what to do by a five-year-old.

“Man, you are so screwed!”

“That’s one pound for you, Mister!”

“Oh shit, right!”

“Two…”

Harry took out his wallet (still laughing his arse off, mind you) and didn’t even try to look for the two pounds, simply putting in a hundred.

Millie’s eyes were focused solely on Tom’s hair. She climbed on top of Harrison, her pink tulle skirt flying behind her and stood on the seat next to the brunette, her hands immediately flying to his hair.

“You have very pretty hair. It’s really soft.”

“Thank you, darling.”

She hummed and kept playing with the soft strands.

“My name’s Tom, and these are my twin brothers Harry and Sam, and my best friend, Haz.”

She looked around for a while, not answering, seemingly lost in thought until she looked back at him and her sparkling (y/e/c) eyes focused on his brown ones.

“Nice to meet you, Tommy. I’m Millie.”

“T-Tommy?”

Sam stuttered out between peels of laughter.

“I don’t like Tom, Tommy’s better. Why are you so shocked Twin Nice?”

Harry looked appalled.

“Why's he Twin Nice?”

“Because you said a bad word and he didn’t, so he’s Twin Nice and you’re Twin Naughty.”

Sam did a little victory dance, bragging about his new nickname to his twin.

The little girl sat down on Tom’s lap and started to play with the black ring on his finger.

“What am I, then?”

She looked up to Harrison from in between Tom’s fingers, still playing with the thick band.

“You’re Thor cause you have pretty eyes and you look really strong.”

To say that the blonde was pleased would be an understatement.

“You, little lady, are my new best friend. We need to come here more often.”

Millie smiled and went back to observing the ring.

“Does this mean you’re married?”

Tom chuckled and shook his head slightly.

“No, it means that I’m a part of the Holland family, like them.”

Everyone around the table showed theirs, a symbol of their high status in the mob.

“So you don’t have a girlfriend?”

“Nope.”

“Do you live with your mommy?”

“No, I live with these dumbasses in a big house.”

She pushed the swear jar towards him and gave him what could only be described as the 'Disappointed Mom’ look.

“Do you like it?”

“Kind of, sometimes they get on my nerves and I wish they’d rot in Hell, but yeah, it’s not too bad.”

She slapped his hand in reprimand and he internally cursed himself.

“Don’t you miss your mommy?”

“A little, but I see my parents every Sunday for family dinner.”

He answered after placing yet another bill in the jar.

“Parents?”

“Yeah, my mum and dad.”

She hummed.

“I wish I had a dad.”

The boys all stiffened.

Well, that escalated quickly.

Tom cleared his throat, measuring his words before speaking, for once in his life.

“Do you know what happened to your dad?”

“Mommy says he left cause he wasn’t good like her. She says it’s okay, though, cause we only need each other but my friend Lilly has a mommy and a daddy and she told me that sometimes when her mommy’s sad or tired he’ll do all the grown-up stuff like cook and read her a story while her mommy rests and she’s happier that way. I want my mommy to be happy like that too.”

For Tom, it felt like his cold, dead heart was starting to beat again. This little angel sitting on his lap was asking for something most children already had, not for herself, but for her mother.

“You’re a really good person, Millie.”

“If you stopped saying so many bad words you’d be one too, Tommy.”

The boys laughed yet again and they continued talking for a little while, refraining from any work-related issues for the sake of their newest addition, choosing instead to discuss sports and fighting over who’d be on cleaning duty that Sunday. Three more bills made their way to the jar during that particular discussion, one from each boy (bar Sam because he was on cooking duty, as always), and for once they allowed themselves to relax and simply be, instead of always worrying.

You got out of the kitchen with the men’s orders ready and looked at the end of the counter, planning to check on Millie before walking over to the mobsters’ table. Your brows furrowed when you didn’t find her and you immediately looked towards the girls’ table or the Lees’, finding she wasn’t there either.

“Mommy, over here!”

You followed your child’s voice and your eyes widened once you saw her sitting on the leader’s lap. The smiling leader’s lap.

You quickly made your way to their booth, placing their orders in front of them without even taking your eyes off your daughter.

“Millicent Rose! What have I told you about bothering people when they’re in their booths?”

She looked guilty for half a second but immediately perked up again, ready to defend herself.

“Not to, but Mommy, he said a bad word so I had to take the swear jar to him.”

“And why, pray tell, are you sitting in the gentleman’s lap?”

“His name’s Tommy and he said he didn’t mind and this way I can talk to Thor, Twin Nice and Twin Naughty better.”

Tommy, Thor, Twin Nice, and Twin Naughty?

“Oh, fuck me.”

Millie’s jaw dropped open. She’d never heard you swear before.

“You owe a pound, Mommy.”

“Yeah, I know, I know.”

You pulled a pound from your pocket and put it in, eyes widening at the amount of money in the jar.

“How in the world?”

“I didn’t have singles so I just put hundreds in. Apparently, it’s a donation to the 'Get Millie new glitter pens’ foundation.”

You set the jar down and shook your head in disbelief.

“I am never letting Harley babysit you ever again.”

She pouted and slumped down, arms crossed adorably in front of her.

“Now come on, let the gentlemen eat their lunch in peace and come get yours.”

She cuddled up to Tom more than before, burying her head in his chest and fisting his shirt, and shaking her head in protest.

“Millie, come on, let’s go. I’m so sorry for the bother sir.”

“It’s no problem, she’s welcome to say for however long she wants.”

The brunette smiled at your daughter and then at you, before the man on his right interrupted.

“Besides, she’s very entertaining. It’s nice to see someone else call Tom out on his bullshit.”

You and Millie threw the blonde matching glares while Tom just pushed the jar towards him.

“You owe a pound, Haz”

“Excuse you Tommy, my name’s Thor.”

He then turned to you with a smug smile and attitude.

“Cause I have pretty eyes like him and look very strong. Don’t you agree with your daughter… (Y/n)?”

He read your name tag and smiled charmingly while you pursed your lips, looking him up and down. You then looked at your little girl.

“You sure?”

“Well, who else has pretty blue eyes?”

“Captain America.”

She light up right away and straightened herself.

“Right! And he looks like Captain America when he was tiny! Thanks, Mommy!”

She then turned to Harrison with a gigantic smile on her face.

“You’re Tiny America now.”

The whole table -bar Haz- laughed and you had to bite your lip not to laugh too, instead linking your hands and looking at the clock.

“Come on Millie, it’s time to eat.”

“Can I eat here with Tommy, please?”

“If you eat here with Tommy I won’t be able to make sure you eat your veggies.”

The man’s heart stuttered when you used his nickname, a strange sense of happiness overcoming him.

“Tommy can check.”

“Mm… I’m not sure if he can check you ate them. He’s not used to your sneakiness.”

“What if I pinky promise to eat my veggies and eat a banana for dessert instead of ice cream?”

It was a struggle to get her to eat fruits and veggies. You usually had to settle for one or the other, so when she spontaneously decided to eat both, you jumped at the opportunity, mob be damned.

“Deal! But no annoying the boys.”

She smiled and nodded, settling comfortably on Tom’s lap, waiting for her food. You took out her plate of chicken nuggets, fries, and green beans, chocolate milkshake to wash it down.

You tried not to let the butterflies in your stomach distract you from your job but the way Tom smiled at your daughter and praised her when she ate all her veggies in a row, wanting to get it over with, made your heart ache, the longing for someone still very much present.

“Have a nice meal.”

You made eye contact with the brunette and blushed at the smile he sent you before waving goodbye at the Lees. The teenage couple had left a bit earlier so the mobsters were now your last customers of the day.

You wiped the kitchen counters and said goodbye to Lou, assuring him that you’d close up by yourself. As soon as he left, you took a deep breath and sighed, unable to stop your smile when you heard your daughter’s laugh carrying through the wall separating you from the group.

“Mommy, we’re done!”

You straightened up and schooled your features before walking over to them, taking away their plates while asking if Millie behaved and if they wanted dessert. The answer to both questions was a yes and so you came back a little while later with chocolate pudding for the twins, caramel ice cream for Harrison, a banana split for Tom, and a miniature one for Millie.

“Since you behaved so nicely you get a little sweetness with your banana.”

Her eyes sparkled and she smiled brightly at you.

“You’re the best mommy ever! I love you!”

“Love you too, baby.”

You turned around, ready to leave, when a voice stopped you.

“Why don’t you sit down with us for a bit? I’m pretty sure that if you wipe that table down one more time you’ll remove the paint.”

You blushed but complied, sitting down next to Harrison and watching as your daughter ate her dessert quickly and quietly, wincing from time to time because of brain freezes. As soon as she was done, she reached for Tom’s right hand. He switched the hand that held the spoon, eating with his left so that Millie could play with the ring on his finger.

Unfortunately for him, he had a bit of trouble eating with his non-dominant hand while holding a child on his lap, leading to a bit of ice cream falling on his shirt.

“Ah, fu-”

You shot him a glare that made him change courses immediately.

“-dge. Fudge.”

Millie clapped and gave him a big, approving smile.

“See, Mommy? He’s making progress!”

“Indeed he is, darling.”

“Oh, this is fucking hilarious!”

The young girl gasped, mouth open comically wide and utter betrayal swimming in her eyes.

“I thought you were nice.”

Sam realized his mistake as soon as she spoke, covering his mouth with his hand as if to stop any more of the offending words from leaving it.

“You owe five pounds.”

“What? Why? I only said one swear word!”

She shook her head in disapproval, arms crossed in front of her chest, and pushed the jar towards him.

“You made me believe you were nice so your trickster-y will cost you four extra pounds.”

You shook your head, smile firmly plastered on your face as you watched Sam pull out a hundred dollar bill with a pout on his lips. It was quite endearing, really.

“So, (Y/n), tell us about you.”

You locked eyes with the brunette once again, piercing gaze seemingly looking through you.

“I’m afraid there’s not much to tell, Mr Holland. I’m not a very interesting person.”

Your voice was soft, your words calculated. You knew that these men could kill you in the blink of an eye.

“No uninteresting person could have raised such a perfect little angel.”

He smirked and Millie looked at you with a smug smile.

“See, he said I was an angel.”

Life be damned, it’s not worth living if your daughter has an ego the size of Russia. That would most definitely come back to bite you in the ass.

“Yeah, that’s cause he hasn’t had to deal with you in all your nightly glory.”

She put her tongue out and snuggled deeper into Tom’s chest.

“Well, for one, how did you find yourself working here?”

He got the conversation back on you and you felt slightly intimidated with the whole table’s eyes on little old you.

“Customers are nice, I earn enough money for us to get by, owner’s nice, the school’s at the end of the street, and Millie gets to stay with me when she’s not there.”

Even though he was focused on you, you noticed the way he held your daughter close to his chest, his bigger frame completely enveloping her smaller one. She still hadn’t let go of his hand and kept playing with the ring on his finger. Seeing how calm and caring he was being with your daughter calmed you down and the more questions you answered, the more comfortable you became.

“How can you work at a dinner and not like vanilla milkshakes?”

Sam looked horrified at that, and you just shrugged dismissively.

“I never really liked when vanilla was too present. Like, if you used it to just enhance everything else you know, make it taste better, then sure, but just vanilla isn’t really my style.”

Tom took a sharp breath in and tried to stop his mind from wandering at the possible double meaning of your words. Instead, he chose to focus on the little girl on his lap.

Until he noticed she was asleep, that is.

He smiled a little and shifted her so she was resting more comfortably on his lap. Unfortunately for him, that caught your attention.

“Oh my, is she asleep? I’m really sorry.”

“No worries, though we should probably get her to bed so she doesn’t wake up with a stiff neck.”

For the umpteenth time, you pushed down the butterflies upon hearing him say 'we’ and being so careful with your daughter.

You took the remaining dishes and went to the kitchen, putting them in the wash and turning on the machine, leaving it to run so tomorrow morning you’d be able to put everything away. You went back in to clean the booth and Tom practically shoved a hundred dollar bill in your hand, ignoring your protests.

He waited for you by the door while you finished closing up, and you extended your arms towards him when you finished.

“Thank you for everything today, but you must be getting tired, I can take her from here.”

He gently pushed your arms down.

“Let me take you home, please, I don’t like the idea of you having to carry her all on your own.”

You hesitantly nodded and he guided you to his car. It’s only then that you noticed the other three had left. You settled on the passenger side of his black Audi and he handed you Millie, closing the door softly as to not startle her. He then entered the driver’s side and started the car. You gave him directions to your apartment building and within five minutes, he parked the car right out front.

Ever the gentleman, he insisted on carrying the little girl. Knowing by now that there wasn’t much you could do to protest, you agreed and led him up the four flights of stairs to your door.

“Sorry 'bout the mess.”

“It’s no problem, darling, I quite like it.”

You turned your head for a brief second, as if asking him to elaborate while still leading him to your daughter’s room.

“The fact that it’s messy means that someone lives here, that this isn’t just some house, it’s a home. My house is always pristine but that’s because no one’s ever there to actually use it as something other than a glorified B&B.”

He laid Millie down on the bed and you pulled the covers over her. You both stood side to side for a little while, just watching her breathe.

“That sounds really lonely.”

“Yeah…”

Another minute passed by with no words coming from either of you.

“You raised an amazing daughter, (Y/n).”

“You’re a good man, Tom.”

Hearing those unfamiliar words coming out of your mouth almost brought tears to his eyes. He was always used to being called a ruthless mobster, cold-blooded killer, or many other names that all meant the same thing: monster. But you called him a good man, and the sincerity in your voice was almost overwhelming.

He cleared his throat and straightened up, making you turn towards him.

“I should probably go… You should get some rest as well.”

You nodded and walked him to the door. In a split-second decision, you leaned up and kissed his cheek, locking eyes with him afterwards.

“If you ever need an escape, or just wanna hang out somewhere different, our door’s always open.”

That made a smile take over his face and he kissed your forehead.

“Thank you, darling.”

And as you watched him round the corner, only your back visible to you, you couldn’t help but feel like this wouldn’t be the last time you ever saw Tom Holland.

i have mixed feelings concerning this story but at least i have ideas for a part two (if i ever decide to make one)

don’t forget to reblog, comment or like if you feel like it <3

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heyitsmerose · 3 years

Text

Ateez Reaction to their s/o having pmdd (Maknae Line)

PMDD - (Premenstrual dysphoric disorder) Is a menstrual disorder that many women have that causes extremely painful period cramps, nauseousness, sever mood swings and is overall quite frustrating to deal with. I am writing this imagine from my experience of pmdd, however remember everyone’s body is different, and in no way do I want to generalise any illness. Okay thank you, happy reading! :)

Word Count: 2.5k

Mature Language*

Smut content

San:

It was a normal day at the dorm, and you and San hadn’t seen each other in a while. Deciding to pay him a visit, you made your way to their dorm to surprise him. You packed some dinner and made your way to the dorm. Upon reaching, you were greeted by Seonghwa and Hongjoong, who were also at the dorm at the time, the rest had gone out, either to practice, or just to do something else. You entered San’s room and sat on his bed waiting for him. He was in the washroom taking a bath, and so you just simply waited for a bit.

About 10 minutes later, San emerged from the washroom with nothing but a towel wrapped around his waist. Once he saw you asleep on the bed, he chuckled and got changed as quietly as possible, trying not to wake you up. After he was done, he decided to sit next to you wake you up gently.

“Babe, it’s me, wake up now please, I wanna see youu” He whined. You readjusted in the bed and got up feeling a little dazed.

You got up and just observed him. The way he was smiling so lovingly at you, the way he had both arms under you, holding the small of your back, lifting you up, his sweet yet husky scent, the way his wet hair was pushed back, the way the thin black fabric of his full sleeved button up allowed you to see all his defined muscles, and you couldn’t help but think about how perfect he was. Still in a daze, you just whispered a hello, and being the affectionate person San was, he immediately took you in his lap and sat you down facing him. He tucked a piece of your hair behind your ear and you hugged him tighter. You hid your face in his chest as you tried to work out and process these weird emotions. You felt bubbly and weird, with a lump forming in your throat.

“Hey, look at me hun!” He teased, laughing and giggling, while lifting your chin up. He pressed a kiss to your nose and that sent you off the edge. Soon, warm tears started pouring out your eyes and you couldn’t form any words.

“Y/N, Y/N, Babe, are you alright, did I hurt you?” He panicked taking your face in both of his hands. You couldn’t get any words out and simply sobbed. You didn’t know what you were feeling and why you were feeling these feelings and tried to stop, but to no avail.

“I-, I-,” You tried getting out, but unable to take in enough air, you weren’t able to speak.

“Hey, hey, hey, Y/N, take it easy, breath in and breath out, I’m sorry if I did something to upset you.” He pouted and looked at you.

“No!” You suddenly interrupted taking him by surprise

“I just love you so much, and I don’t know what’s wrong with me, I’m an emotional mess, why are you so perfecttt” You rambled, whining your words at the end, and crying again. By this point you had gotten the attention of Hongjoong and Seonghwa too, and they were watching the both of you secretly through the doorway.

“Wait, what?” San asked a little confused.

“I said you’re so perfect, you’re just so fucking amazing and you make me feel these emotions that I’ve never felt before, I just feel so lucky and happy that you’re mine, it’s overwhelming.” You said finally, getting that off your chest.

“Well, I love you too Y/N, and I bet I love you more” he said with his eyes full of tears too. It was overwhelming to him too, how much you loved and valued him.

“Yah, San-ah I’m on my period I’m allowed to act all sappy and moody, you’re nott” You both chuckled and laughed at each other.

“Well, what can I do, I just love you so much” he replied and you wiped his tears. You heard whistles from the doorway and knew it was Hongjoong and Seonghwa.

You stayed as close to each other as possible for the rest of the evening, not even leaving one another to go anywhere.

Mingi:

You were on your period and Mingi was well aware of it. A few days before your period you always felt a little needy, and by now Mingi was used to your mood swings and weird behaviour. What he didn’t anticipate however, was you having pmdd. Neither did you. He’s had girlfriends before, and although he didn’t mean to compare, he noticed your symptoms were a little more extreme compared to everyone else. In fact, he was the one that suggested you go to the doctor, and thus here you were.

You had come to the OB/GYN with your boyfriend Mingi, since he was concerned for you. You always went through this, and been doing so for the past 10 years, so you didn’t think much of it. However when Mingi once came across you throwing up and crying in pain, he knew something was wrong. He found that you had been hiding your symptoms to not bother him. As you had expected, the second he found out, he freaked out and booked an appointment with the doctor. At the moment, you were answering a few questions about your symptoms and were surprised to find that every single symptom matched yours. You just assumed that everyone went through this every month, apparently not. You were starting to get worried. What if you weren’t normal, what if there was actually something really wrong with you. You interlaced your fingers with Mingi, and filled out the rest of the forms, describing your symptoms to the nurse. The nurse noted down your symptoms, sighed and left the room. You started biting your nails and bouncing your knee, your were getting nervous.

“Hey, Y/N” Mingi called to you lovingly “What’s wrong, you seem nervous”

“Mingi, what if it’s something serious, like what if I have cancer or something?” You suddenly blurted out. Mingi frowned and took both your hands in his.

“Hey, don’t say that, for all we know, it could be normal and you would just need a few meds, I promise It won’t be as bad as you think” He assured you, but inside he was just as nervous and scared, if not, maybe even a little more than you.

A few minutes later, the nurse arrived inside the room with your results printed on a piece of paper. She handed it to you, and you read through it while also trying to pay attention to what she was saying.

“Miss, Y/N, you most likely have, what’s known as Premenstrual dysphoric disorder. Its similar to PMS but is a little more severe. It won’t cause too much trouble to your life however we’d suggest taking birth control to help reduce the symptoms slightly” She suggested looking at the both of you. She proceeded to leave to room to give you both some space. You looked up at Mingi, and he smiled back down at you.

“See, it’s nothing too serious, besides, birth control gives us an excuse to have more sex” He laughed at you while you playfully shoved him.

You were thankful to have such a caring boyfriend like Mingi, who always looked out for you. For the months and years to come, he always made sure you took your medicines and eased the pain and helped in whatever way he could.

Wooyoung:

You and Wooyoung were such a power couple. Both of you being complete crackheads, there was not one day that was boring in your relationship. You always knew how to match each others energy and took risks together. That’s what you loved about him, his ability to keep up with your crazy personality. In fact, it’s quite cheesy, but you truly completed each other, he knew you inside and out and you knew him completely too.

You had come out to a restaurant to just spend some time with one another and were enjoying each other’s company. It was rare to have moments like these, where it was just the both of you, and you loved spending time with each other.

You were halfway through dinner, eating your appetisers, when all of a sudden, you felt a wet feeling down your leg. You cursed realising you could have potentially leaked out of your tampon, and excused yourself to go use the washroom. Once you left, you quickly wobbled to a stall and pulled your underwear down to check. As you predicted, you had in fact leaked, but it was worse than you thought. The bottom of your dress was completely stained red, and your underwear was completely soaked in blood. You tampon was lost somewhere in the red ocean of blood and you had no clue what to do. You realised you left your phone on the table, so you couldn’t do anything. You sat on the toilet, with nothing to do just contemplating what you should do next.

Meanwhile, Wooyoung was just waiting for you on the table itself. After around 20 minutes passed, he started to get worried and checked his phone to see check if he got any messages from you. He then glanced to your side and noticed your phone still there on the table. Looking back at his phone he checked the time... and the date. Cursing to himself quietly, he realised that it was that time of the month, and knowing you had pmdd, he knew something must have probably happened. Without another thought, he ran to the washroom slamming the door open.

“Y/N? Babe? are you there?” You heard Wooyoungs voice call out.

“Wooyoung? Thank god, I’m like stuck here and I don’t know what to do.” You said relieved that he finally noticed you were gone.

“Okay, no one’s here in the washroom, I’m locking the washroom door, could you open your stall door?” You obliged and opened your stall door, greeting him with a bunch of blood on the floor and completely destroyed underwear. He snickered at your situation began removing him pants.

“Woo, what the fuck are you doing?” You asked him thinking he was going crazy.

“Calm down, just take my boxers and like wrap them in some tissue paper, it should work as a makeshift pad. Also I’ll give you my denim jacket, just tie it around your waist or something” He said removing his underwear. You quickly agreed and wore his underwear after stuffing it with tissue paper. He then gave you his jacket and you wrapped it around your waist. He pulled back up his pants, threw your underwear in the dustbin and cleaned up after you. You were in that point of your relationship where both of you were completely comfortable with eachother, so this was nothing major. Once he was done and walked in front of you, you took the opportunity to smack his ass.

“Wow, maybe you should just not wear underwear” You laughed at him

“Very funny” He sarcastically responded back.

Jonho:

You were at Jongho’s place and were just laying on his bed. You both had been dating for not too long, around 1 month at max, and you still always felt a little uncomfortable, or rather self conscious and insecure around him. Besides, he was everyones dream guy, with a voice sweeter than honey and not to mentioned those muscles, while you were just, you. You tried your best to always act as nice and proper as you could, and still hadn’t completely opened up to him yet. Jongho on the other hand, was falling for you, hard. He was absolutely smitten and no other person had ever made him feel this way. He loved when you visited as you got to spend time with each other.

You were just on your phone, while he was downstairs getting something to eat. You popped a breath mint in your mouth, and readjusted your position to get more comfortable. After laying there for a few minutes, Jongho came back with some strawberries and chocolate, the perfect, lowkey yet romantic food ever. You made sure to eat them slowly and properly, too scared you’d scare him away by scarfing them down. Jongho on the other had, had no problem eating them quickly. You just laughed at him and looked at him lovingly. He noticed you staring at him and a bright smile spread across his face. Wanting to get a little closer, he took the first step and decided to pull you closer to him by your waist. You jumped a little at the movement, but soon scooted towards him, and laid your head on his shoulder. Trying to ease the tension and make the situation a little less awkward, Jongho put his hand on the bed, around you. What he didn’t anticipate however was for there to be a wet spot, of blood. He quickly peeked behind you and saw a giant spot of blood, where you were sitting before. Not wanting to embarrass you, he calmly said...

“Hey, Y/N, you seem to have had a little accident, don’t worry, I’ll clean it up, I have a hoodie you can wear, and you can borrow my boxers too, if you’d like. I’ll just get some pads from the nearby pharmacy too, just a sec” He said smiling at you and getting up. However for you, this was your worst nightmare.

“Wait what?” You looked to your side to see a giant red patch of blood on his light blue sheets. You gasped and to your horror, he had already gotten up pulling the bedsheets off.

“Oh my god! I’m so sorry, I’ll deal with it, please come back in a few minutes or something, I don’t want you to see me like this, please” You begged him tears leaving your eyes from panic and embarrassment. He didn’t move however, continuing on with what he was doing.

“No, no, no, Jongho, please, this is so embarrassing, please, I’ll clean it up” You said, your voice cracking multiple times. Jongho immediately left what he was doing and walked to you holding your chin with his fingers.

“Hey, hey, hey Y/N, you have no reason to be embarrassed, this is natural and I love you, it’s alright.” He said, not realising the impact of his words

“You love me?” You asked clarifying, maybe your ears had deceived you.

“Um, well, yeah-” He said stuttering a blush growing on his cheeks. You took the opportunity and for the first time in your relationship, you kissed him softly and responded...

“I love you too”

#Ateez x reader #ateez fanfic #ateez ff #ateez fanfiction #ateez jongho #ateez san #ateez mingi #ateez wooyoung #mingi #jongho #wooyoung #san #ateez whump #ateez angst #ateez fluff #ateez sad #ateez bad period #pmdd ff

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mersuperwholocked-lowlife · 3 years

Text

Back To Normal

Word Count: 2,154

Characters: Dean Winchester, John Winchester, Sam Winchester, Bobby SInger (brief), Reader

Pairings: Dean Winchester x Sister!Reader

Warnings: angst, small fluff, mentions of past abuse

A/N: idek what to say but hi i guess

A/N 2: Reader is like 2 years older than Dean

Masterlist

You walked to your parents’ room in the middle of the night, the house dark. It was probably around 2 but that didn't stop you from going to your dad, tugging on his arm.

“(Y/N)? What are you doing up, kiddo?” he asked softly, frowning as he turned the light on.

“What’s going on?” Mary sat up, looking at you cautiously.

“I had a bad dream, daddy. Can I sleep with you?” you wiped your eyes, yawning slightly as you continued to hold onto John’s hand.

“Of course you can, come on, let’s go to bed,” he lifted you up, wrapping his arms around you in a protective manner as he turned the lights off.

You continued holding onto his arm, falling asleep.

---

You shot up, hearing someone yelling as you quickly got out of bed, running to Dean.

“Dean, wake up!” you shook him slightly, as he looked at you, confused.

“Daddy’s yelling!” you said, holding his hand as the two of you ran out of your shared room, seeing a bright light coming out of Sam’s nursery.

“Daddy? What’s wrong?” you walked into the room, screaming as you saw the horrendous sight, your mother somehow pinned to the ceiling, blood dripping out of her stomach as the ceiling around her caught on fire.

“(Y/N)! (Y/N), take Sam and Dean out! Now!” he placed your six-month-old brother in your hand, as you held onto him tightly, holding Dean’s hand with your free hand.

You ran out of the house, watching flames coming out of the window.

“It’s gonna be okay, De,” you said softly.

You felt John’s arms wrap around the three of you, pulling you away to safety, watching your house envelop in flames.

---

“Again, (Y/N),” John handed you the gun, as you scratched your arm nervously, before picking it up.

You unloaded, then reloaded the gun, turning the safety off, then back on.

“38 seconds. You need to do it in under 15,” you nodded your head softly, listening to John.

“Yes, sir,” you replied, your voice low.

“I’m going to go out. Watch Sam and Dean,” before you could reply, he grabbed his jacket, slamming the door shut as you flinched slightly, before resting your head on your hands.

---

“Dean, can you help me out here?” you asked, rubbing your head.

“Sam doesn't listen to me either,” he shrugged. He flipped on the TV, watching some sort of cartoon as you groaned, turning back to Sam.

“Sam, you have to do your homework and you have to eat your dinner. Now,” you tried not to raise your voice, clearly annoyed by both of them.

“No, I don’t want to. I wanna watch TV with Dean,” he crossed his arms, frowning.

“After you do all your work,” you sighed.

“How come Dean doesn't have to do his work? Or eat his dinner?” Sam crossed his arms as you clenched your jaw, digging your nails into your palm.

I hate them both

“Dean already finished all his work! Sam, I’m serious!” you groaned.

Every day seemed to go like this. One or both of them would choose not to listen to you, getting you more irritated and stressed. You still had a huge amount of homework to do, half of which you could barely understand, and instead of doing it, you were trying to get Sam to listen. As usual.

“Dean didn’t do his homework!” Sam screamed as you winced, his shouting giving you a headache.

“He’s lying! I did it!” Dean shot up, pointing his finger at Sam.

Before you could say anything, both brothers started screaming at each other, leaving you with a headache.

“Enough!” you turned off the TV, pulling Dean to the table.

“Both of you shut up and do your homework! Now!” you yelled.

Sam sniffled, immediately looking down.

Great, now he’s crying

“Dude, you made him cry,” Dean looked up at you.

“Shut up, Dean. Do your work,” you rolled your eyes, before turning to Sam.

“You’re mean,” Sam said, his voice low.

“And you're a brat. Here’s a pencil,” you handed it to him, watching as the two of them tended to their homework.

---

“Dad,” you started softly.

He simply glared at you, before looking back at the road.

The two of you rode back to the hotel, where Sam and Dean were.

“Dad, I’m sorry,” you started.

“Shut up, (Y/N),” he snapped.

He left for a hunt, again. Leaving you with Sam and Dean, again. Leaving you with barely enough money to feed one of you, let alone three. You saw your only option was to steal. You didn't like it but you had no choice. Sam began to come down with a fever, and he needed medicine.

“You didn't leave us with… Sam was sick,” your voice broke as your heart began to race out of fear for what was going to happen to you.

“He’s fine now,” you looked at John nervously before running your fingers through your hair.

The rest of the ride remained silent, before approaching the hotel room. It was empty.

You turned to John, your eyes widening as you contained your panic.

You weren't allowed to be weak in front of John.

“They’re at Bobby’s. You’re with me for the week,” he threw his bag onto the floor as you flinched, trying your hardest to maintain this weekend.

You already knew that the worst was yet to come.

---

“Hey, are you okay?” your head shot up, as you opened your eyes, looking at Dean.

“No, I mean, yeah, I’m fine, sorry,” you shook your head, smiling softly at your younger brother.

“Sam’s passed out. Do you wanna watch a movie or something?” he asked, sitting next to you on the floor.

Dean graduated high school, spending more and more time with you and John, seeing what John does to you. You prayed that he wouldn't witness any of it but lately, none of your prayers seemed to help anything. You currently sat there with a black eye, saying it was from a hunt, but Dean knew otherwise.

“No, it’s fine,” you sighed, keeping your voice down.

The two of you sat in the dark, as Dean rested his head on your shoulder.

“I’m sorry for being such a bitch when I was younger,” he said softly.

“Oh, don't be. If it makes you feel any better, Sam was worse,” you laughed softly.

“I can't believe you dealt with us,” he shook his head.

“Well, why wouldn't I? You’re still my brother. Come on, you should get to bed,” you said.

“Are you going to sleep?” he asked.

“No, I need to watch over you guys,” you shook your head.

“That’s ridiculous. I’m not going to sleep till you do,” he crossed his arms.

“Well then, looks like you’re not getting any sleep tonight,” you turned, looking at him.

“Then so be it,” he continued to rest his head on your arm, as you scoffed before you continued to stare at the door.

You could feel Dean falling asleep, hearing him snoring. You pressed your lips against his forehead, stroking his hand softly.

---

“Oh my god!” you shot up in the bed, clenching your jaw as you held in your screams, feeling pain emit throughout your body.

“(Y/N)!” Sam and Dean ran to you, as you winced before they backed away.

“What happened?” you whispered.

Your arm was wrapped up in bandages, a sling on your shoulder. Your forehead was covered in bandages, scratches all over your body.

“What do you remember?” Dean asked.

You looked up at them, seeing tears in their eyes.

“The demon… yellow eyes… where’s Dad?” you asked softly.

“He sold his soul for Dean,” Sam whispered a reply.

Your eyes watered as you felt a shiver over your body.

You sniffled, wiping your tears as you looked at Dean.

“I-It’s gonna be okay,” you said softly, wrapping your arm around Sam and Dean.

“It's gonna be okay.”

---

“(Y/N), it’s 3 AM,” Bobby walked into his study room, sitting down in front of you.

The three of you finished a hunt nearby, crashing at Bobby’s for the night.

He offered you a beer, as you took it from him.

“Do you have anything to say, kid?” he asked you.

“No, I want to sit here and drink this beer in silence, please,” you sighed.

“What is it with you Winchesters never showing any damn emotion?” he raised his voice slightly as you sighed.

You ran your fingers through your hair, resting your arm on the table.

“Why won’t you go to bed?” he asked.

“Bye, Bobby,” you pushed out of your seat, grabbing your jacket.

“The hell do you think you're doing, young lady?” he immediately crossed his arms, standing in front of the door.

“I’m going out. I’ll see you in the morning,” you walked past him, leaving his house.

---

You sat in the driver’s seat, hearing Dean yelling at you.

“I don’t…” you hiccupped.

“I don’t know why you’re so mad,” you shrugged, laying back in the seat.

“You’re not driving, you’re drunk. Scoot over,” Dean crossed his arms.

“I’m not drunk, you’re drunk. And bossy,” you laughed, nearly falling off your seat as Dean forcibly pushed out over, sitting in the driver’s seat.

“It’s been a month of this crap. When was the last time you even slept?” Dean asked.

“I don’t like to sleep,” you looked out the window, watching all the trees passing by.

Something about the trees seemed to mesmerize you, as you yawned, blinking your eyes.

“Why don’t you like to sleep?” Dean asked.

Within 20 seconds, you fell onto Dean as he groaned, looking at you completely passed out.

“(Y/N),” Dean said, pushing you off of him.

“(Y/N),” he repeated.

Your head fell against the window, as Dean listened to your breathing, making sure you didn't just die on him.

It had been a month of that. Ever since John died, you barely slept, spending all your time on either hunts or in a stranger’s bed, completely drunk.

Dean followed you, stopping whatever person was hitting on you and took your joke, slightly disappointed, slightly feeling pity for you.

Something happened to make you like this, and all he wanted was you back to normal.

His face softened, looking at your shaking figure. He took his jacket off, laying it on you before continuing to look forward at the road.

---

“We need to talk,” Dean sat at the edge of your bed, as you sat up, rubbing your head.

He handed you a glass of water and some aspirin. You silently thanked him, before clearing your throat.

“What's the problem?” you asked.

“You,” he replied.

“Excuse me?” you raised an eyebrow.

“One month. Since Dad died. Since you changed completely. You go out every night when we’re not hunting, don’t try to lie to me and tell me that you’re getting sleep because I know damn well that you’re not. We’re worried about you and we want our sister. We lost Dad, we don’t want to lose you too,” your eyes watered slightly as you looked at Dean.

You knew he was right. You felt shame immediately, knowing that John was looking at you, disappointed. From above or below. You weren't even taking care of Sam and Dean.

“I’m sorry,” you replied.

“I don’t want an apology. I want you back to normal,” you ran your fingers through your hair, blinking back your tears as you sniffled.

Just tell him, it’ll have to come out sooner or later

“I’ve just been… I’ve been having nightmares about Dad,” you sniffled.

His face softened, as he scooted closer to you.

“Why didn't you tell me?” he asked softly.

“It’s not your problem to worry about,” you rested your head on your lap.

“Not my problem? (Y/N),” he started.

“You don’t understand, Dean. Please, just go,” you closed your eyes, feeling a tear streaming down your cheek.

He wrapped his arms around you tightly, as you held him.

“Dad’s gone. H-He’s dead. He can’t hurt you anymore, you don’t have to keep putting up a shield and blocking out everyone and everything,” you held back your cries as you buried yourself into Dean’s arms.

“I know,” you whispered.

“He can’t do anything to you ever again,” Dean’s voice was shaky, you could feel his tears.

“I’m sorry, Dean,” you cried softly.

“You have nothing to be sorry for. I-I’m sorry I wasn't here for you sooner,” you stroked his cheek softly, sniffling as you smiled at him softly.

“I love you, kiddo,” you said.

“I love you too, (Y/N/N),” he replied, laying down next to you.

“Sam’s out doing nerdy stuff with Bobby. What do you say to a movie or two?” he looked up at you.

“Yeah, sure,” you stroked his hair softly, turning the TV on.

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startanewdream · 3 years

Text

The first night (of the rest of my life)

The best part of writing stories in a Jily Lives AU is the possibility of making things better for everyone. For Harry, it's the support of his parents. For Sirius, it meant no guilt and no years at Azkaban. And for Remus, this is what I imagine it could mean.

Happy birthday, Moony.

Read on AO3 or below the cut:

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'And then, I swear I am not making this up, she smiled and told me it was about time I called her by her first name'.

Remus raises his eyebrows teasingly.

'I could believe the second part, but the smile?'

'I solemnly swear', James assures him, busy with washing the dishes from Harry’s dinner. 'It only took me seven years after graduation, but now Minerva and I are on a first-name basis’.

Remus laughs.

'You seem even more satisfied than when Lily first called you James'.

'Watch out', Sirius says, entering the kitchen after tucking Harry in for the night. 'Or the next we know he will be writing “JP and MM forever” in his notebooks too'.

James flushes.

'You are just jealous that she is still Professor McGonagall to you', he says smugly.

'And you are too boastful for someone who sees her once a month again', Sirius replies. 'It seems you are still in detention after all these years'.

'Nah, this time she seems actually happy to see me. I even dare to say she is proud of me'.

'What I said? Lily better watch out for you two'.

'Speaking of Lily', Remus pops in, distracted. 'Where is she?'

There is a moment of silence and he raises his eyes to find James and Sirius exchanging a strange look.

'She is still on her work', answers James, his voice carefully light.

Remus frowns.

'It's eight already - I thought she would dine with us'.

'She has been doing some overtime, nothing to worry', James says, shrugging and raising to get them more drinks, though Remus has the distinct feeling he is just trying to get away.

That is Prongs. Whenever he needs to hide something from his friends, he runs as if he is afraid he will admit something under pressure.

It is probably unrelated but Remus suddenly remembers when his friends decided to become animagi and how James had suffered keeping it from him until they finally told him.

The expression of guilt on his face is the same.

'Well, we can have a gentleman's night', Sirius says, his voice loud and excited - just as he acts when he is trying to compensate for something.

Sometimes Remus knows his friends too well.

'Yes, because it's not like tomorrow night is full moon', he notes, raising his brows, looking curious from one to another.

Neither answers. Remus tries to remember the last time he saw Lily; she had been weirdly absent in the last months, and the few times he had met her she'd looked distraught, as if she hadn't been sleeping much.

And there was the day after the last full moon when Remus had woken up in that cabin in the woods to find Lily tending to him, her eyes red from crying as she applied a healing potion to his injuries for the night.

Remus had looked at the cuts in his arms, thinking it was strange she looked so upset with them - there were only the usual cuts that the werewolf had done to himself at some point, not worse than any he had before.

'Lily?', he'd asked, worried, and she raised her green eyes to him.

'I am so sorry, Remus', she sniffed, tears dropping from her eyes. 'I'm working on it as fast as I can, I swear…'

Remus had no idea what she was talking about but he hugged her, trying to comfort her, until she calmed herself and dried her eyes.

'Sorry', she said, trying to smile bravely at him. 'I am just sensible today'.

'I got that time of the month too', he said playfully and Lily had let out a reluctant laugh.

But that had been one of the last interactions they had. Any time Remus had come to dinner Lily was not around, returning only late in the night, and even on the weekends, she had been on her work.

'Belby has been that hard on her?', Remus asks, trying to make some sense.

'Lily is hard on herself', James answers, with a sigh.

'Is everything ok…?'

'Yeah, just my workaholic wife'.

'Let's talk about more pressing matters', Sirius cuts in, offering Remus a glass of wine. 'Your birthday party, this Sunday. What do you wanna do?'

Remus shrugs.

'Nothing, really. Just a cake will be fine'.

'Chocolate cake?', James asks knowingly, just as Sirius shakes his head, indignant.

'No, big party! Think chocolate fountain! Giant balloons! Nice people that I could introduce you to from work!'

Remus smiles.

'You are only thinking of things to entertain yourself'.

'The balloons are for Harry', Sirius notes, winking. 'And the guests - I would never date someone from work!'

'As if that could stop you', Remus mocks. Then he grimaces. 'My birthday is only two days after the full moon, I will be too tired'.

Again, Sirius and James exchange that suspicious look.

'Maybe a small party then, but we can call some people. It's a date to celebrate, Moony', James says amicably.

'It's just -'

'And Harry loves birthday parties', James adds, grinning at Remus when he shakes his head in defeat.

Using Harry against him is very low, they all know. All three would do anything to make Harry happy.

Well, Remus thinks, Harry will really love the balloons.

'Fine', he agrees, making James and Sirius beam. 'But a small feast. I am not ready for another mess like that Sirius' birthday party'.

'My 24th deserved 24 hours of party', Sirius replies without any shame, and Remus has to smirk at the remembrance of taking Sirius to the hospital after the last hour of his party.

It had been a nice day - all 24 hours of it, even if Remus only lasted the first twelve hours.

___________

Remus stays in James' house for the night, since he will have to be there the next night for the transformation anyway.

They go to sleep late, almost midnight, but Remus doesn't hear Lily coming home. And when he wakes up the next morning - always early because he can never oversleep -, Lily is already gone, only her cup of tea on the table indicating she was even there.

'James', Remus calls, when his friend enters the kitchen yawning, bringing an excited Harry that runs to hug Remus. 'What's going on with Lily?'

'I told you, Moony -'

'Mama is working!', Harry cries happily. 'Biiiiig project'.

His eyes are open and round, as if Harry is sharing a secret.

'What project?'

'It's for helping people! Mama says she will be back when she finishes and every night she comes to see me and kiss me even if I am sleeping! I miss her but it's for help so she says she has to do it!'

'Calm down, Harry', James asks, grinning at Harry without looking at Remus. 'Eat your breakfast - no chewing with your mouth open'.

'Sirius do it'.

'Yeah, but Uncle Moony doesn't, and who do you think is a better role model?'

Harry giggles.

'I have some errands to do today, Moony, could you watch over Harry for me?'

Remus nods.

'Yeah, but… what's this project?'

'Just something that's been driving Lily eager to finish it'.

'Oh. Okay, but… she shouldn't stress herself so much - I didn't even hear she coming home last night -'

'I know', James interrupts him, a line of worry on his forehead as if he is in a conflict. 'But - it's for a good cause and… she knows what she is doing'.

He doesn't seem like he wants to talk about it, so Remus just frowns to himself and goes to share breakfast with Harry, hoping everything is alright with Lily - and between her and James.

He spends the day together with Harry, with Remus mostly trying to keep up with Harry's energy - that kid is truly James' son because Harry seems to think any time he is not running or playing is a waste of time. Usually, Remus could deal with it just fine, but the proximity of the full moon night always makes him feel exhausted, as if anticipating how he will be worn out the next day.

In the afternoon, Harry seems to notice he is down because he puts down his figure toys to look at Remus.

'Are you ok, Uncle Moony?’, he asks, worried, looking very much like his mother when he is frowning.

‘Yes, yes, Harry. Continue your story - so the stag went with the dog to the lake, then what?’

‘They are waiting for the wolf’, Harry shrugs, pointing to the tiny wolf toy in Remus’s hand. ‘But you look tired… do you want to nap?’

‘No, I’m awake’.

‘Is it because of your flu?’

Remus sighs, nodding without saying anything. They never really explained to Harry what exactly was Remus’ condition, though Remus knows that Harry will soon be old enough to understand. They just told him Remus was sick every month and at some point, Harry had started talking about it as “the flu”, something no one had corrected him.

They all agree it is Remus’ call when to talk about it and Remus knows he is the one postponing. It's not that he doubts that James and Lily could explain it to Harry in a way that he could understand - it's just an irrational fear that this boy, who considers him his uncle, who is always so eager to hug him and treat him normally, may look differently at him if he knows what Remus is.

It would break his heart.

'We can do other things', Harry says brightly, picking up his toys to store them. 'We can read!'

Harry chooses a book that he seems to know by heart, speaking even before Remus can read it out loud to him. Harry is lying with the head on his lap, allowing Remus to mess with his dark hair the way Harry loves to copy his father, while he reads the story, and Remus just feels happy.

'You and dad will be on an adventure tonight?', Harry asks at some point in the story, as the hero is leaving for his quest with the help of his friend.

'We will. And Sirius too'.

'I wish I could go', Harry says in a lamented voice. 'But Mum tells me it is in the woods and I can't go there'.

Remus has a sudden vision of Harry - little bright Harry, not even five yet, going alone in the woods while he is transformed - a moment of distraction for James and Sirius and then the werewolf, always hungry for humans, would lose it…

'NO!', he screams, making Harry jump, suddenly afraid. 'You can never go into the woods when we are there, Harry, promise this!'.

Harry is pale, his lips trembling, but he nods. Remus feels his heart calming down slowly, just as reason comes back to him. James always puts spells around the house to make sure Harry won't leave, knowing the danger it would represent; he is careful that nothing will happen to Harry or Lily.

Remus takes a deep breath.

'I am sorry for yelling, Harry', he says, offering his hands in peace and Harry comes back to him, trusting as always. 'I was just scared. It's dangerous out there'.

'You go there', he whispers. 'I wanna be brave like Dad'.

'When you become an animal too you can go', he says, smiling, and after a second Harry returns the smile too, picking up the book fallen on the floor.

'Preferably a registered one', they hear a tired voice saying from the door and, when they turn, they see Lily smiling upon them.

'Mama!', Harry cries, running to her, and Lily kneels to allow Harry to hug her. 'I miss you!'

'I missed you too', she says, kissing him in the forehead. 'We will be together more now, okay?’

‘Big project is done?’

‘I sure hope so. Why don't you go upstairs with Sirius for a shower?'

'Can I use your bathtub?'

'You can, but only if Sirius promises not to change into a dog there', she replies, throwing a warning look at Sirius, besides her. He just grins.

'What can I say? It's easy to make the kid bath when he is playing'.

'Last time there was black fur everywhere'.

Sirius shrugs, a playful gleam in his eyes, and he winks at Harry, who runs to his side.

'He will turn into a dog anyway, you know that, right?', Remus asks when they are alone. Lily laughs.

'Yeah, but they both enjoy it more when they think I am forbidding', she says unworriedly, coming to sit next to Remus. James comes too, staying up, a hand on Lily's shoulder as if in support while the other holds a goblet with a boiling potion.

Remus watches Lily. She looks even wearier than he feels with the full moon hours away, but there is an expression on her face, of satisfaction for a work well-done, that it makes him think, for a moment, that she would have been a great Marauder back in school.

'How you doing, Lils?', he asks. 'You've been overworking as far as -'

'It was for a good cause', Lily interrupts him. 'We were so close to finish it, I couldn't stop'.

'Stop what?'

'This', she says, picking up the goblet on James' hand and offering him. He wrinkles his nose at the smell. 'It's the Wolfsbane Potion'.

'Wolfsbane…?'

'Belby and I have been working on it for years, but in the last months we advanced finally. It took us a lot of time to fix the proportion of aconite without being fatal, and then how to prepare but… it's for helping werewolves'.

Remus feels his mouth dry.

'What do you mean?', he asks in a small voice.

Lily's smile is kind.

'We can't cure you, but this potion can help you to maintain your thoughts while you are transformed. You won't lose your mind anymore'.

'I - I can be myself?'

'Your wolfish version', James agrees. 'If you take the potion, tonight you can see how much fun Prongs and Padfoot are for yourself'.

Remus blinks, still struggling to understand. Keeping his mind while a werewolf would mean for once not being a danger to anyone, for once being in control, and would mean being as much a participant as Sirius and James instead of… instead of a wild monster.

'I - I don't know what to say -'

'Just promise you won't complain about the taste', Lily quips, winking at him. 'We couldn’t add anything or it could hinder -’

‘I would drink from Snape’s old panties if it meant -’

‘I don’t think it’s that bad’, James says quickly, while Lily rolls her eyes. Remus gives a nervous laugh.

‘I really can’t thank you enough - it means so much to -’

‘You deserve some peace, Remus’, Lily assures him. ‘Not only you, but everyone that faces the same condition. I’ve talked to Belby - we want to make sure this potion is available for every werewolf in the country’.

‘This - it could make a difference -'

'It's what we hope for', James says. 'Maybe even sponsor an institute for it - we know how most hide their condition, so there is much work to do -'

'But that's a work in progress. For now, Remus, just drink so it will work for tonight - for the next month you will have to drink everyday on the week before the full moon, but -'

He doesn't expect her to finish, drinking the potion in one long gulp. Lily was right; the taste is really horrible, but he doesn't mind. All he can taste is the freedom of fears of being a werewolf.

'Thank you', he whispers, looking at Lily, feeling very much like the time he found out his friends were becoming animagi for him. 'Thank you so much'.

'Happy early birthday, Remus', she says kissing him on the cheek.

_____________

The transformation is painful as always as if his body is fighting itself to not become a wolf - it's nothing like the smooth transformations of James and Sirius, whose animal versions seem to be just an extension of who they are.

But for once Remus doesn't lose track in the middle of the pain, doesn't feel his mind hiding to that safe dark spot on his brain where it always takes refuge in full moon nights while the wolf dominates his body.

Instead, he remains watching everything and when the pain finally fades away, when his human cries turn into a howl, he sees all the differences for the first time. He sees how he is on fours now, his body much bigger and stronger, with a soft grey fur covering it; he is warm, even though he can feel the cold wind trembling softly his fur. He can see even differently, the wolf vision the same as if it were during the day, only the colours a little off. There are also so many scents and sounds, much more than he knows he could comprehend with his normal human senses.

It's a little overwhelming, but exciting too. This must be what James and Sirius always commented about being an animal, why they were so addicted to being this other version of themselves.

And speaking of them, Remus hears the soft sound of steps on leaves and he turns almost without thinking, just reacting to some instinct of self-defence.

The stag and the dog walk calmly, side by side, and then he calms down; he recognizes his friends, and for the first time Remus truly appreciates the sight of his two best friends, how majestic the stag is and how wild the dog looks. No wonder the werewolf learned to respect them.

But Remus doesn't need to respect them. He can just love them.

He jumps on them, playing, but both animals must have too much practice, so they just let Remus land in the middle of them, circling him as if Remus is the prey instead of the hunter. It's a play, a silly game of tag that ends with the dog fondly biting his neck in winning, but Remus doesn't mind losing.

He is winning much more and he knows it.

They show him the woods, indicating their favourite spots - a hot spring water that comes out of the stones forming a nice small lake for relaxing, a big meadow where the stag lays down lazily under the moonlight, a place full of rabbits hole that the dog enjoys hunting.

Then they return to the cabin in the woods just as the moon is setting and Remus mopes, for the first time, that this full moon night was strangely short. It always seemed longer when he lost consciousness.

But this time there is no change, no sudden waking up with fear as he turns back into his human self, and then, as it happened a hundred times before, James and Sirius are there helping him put back his clothes and lifting him to the bedroom so he can rest.

His body hurts from the transformation, though Remus knows that, for once, he is not injured in any way. But the best part is having his mind perfectly well, healed, knowing for sure that he didn't hurt anyone tonight.

He feels the tiredness winning when he stares at his two best friends.

'Thank you', he whispers, thinking it's not for tonight he is grateful for, but for the last ten years of company on full moon nights - and even more years of friendship.

The words can't leave his mouth, but they nod, their smiling faces coming out of focus as Remus' eyelids finally close, and his last coherent thought is that, for the first time, Prongs, Padfoot and Moony truly rode together.

#Remus Lupin #James Potter #Sirius Black #Marauders #jily lives is a happier world #Eyes Glistening #t: fanfiction

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haikyunicorn · 3 years

Text

⋇ kiss and make up [semi eita x reader]

pairing(s): semi eita x reader

genre: angst with a happy ending, friends to lovers, roommates au

warning(s): like 2 curse words

word count: 2.91k

requested by: @dorkyhaikyu

Semi Eita has been in a mood recently. You know it isn’t an unusual occurrence - he tends to be a little sulky or wants to be left alone if he’s had a bad day - but his fits usually only last for a few hours at most, not a whole week.

You are at a loss. You’ve known Semi for almost 7 years now, ever since you both attended Shiratorizawa and you signed up to be the manager of the volleyball club during your first year, and Semi had never acted this way towards you before. Being in the same year, you, Semi, Tendou, Ushijima and Reon easily formed a tight-knit friendship, often eating lunch or walking back to the dorms together.

Though, somewhere along the three years you spent together, your feelings had sort of developed into something a little more than friendly adoration for the grey-haired setter. You never ended up acknowledging those feelings, fearing it would only ruin your relationship not only with him, but with the other third years as well. So you shoved them deep down in your heart and tried your best to not let it consume you. Even if Tendou had tried multiple times to corner you and confront you about your tiny crush (you’d been staring too long, cheering too loud or being too kind for it to be just friendly gestures, he says), you stood your ground each time and adamantly denied his suspicions. Besides, Semi had never once shown any signs of reciprocating your feelings, so you figured you shouldn’t baselessly act on it and embarrass yourself.

Still, it hadn’t been a difficult decision to agree on sharing an apartment when you and Semi were accepted into the same college a few hours away. Firstly, it would eliminate the need to find a new roommate altogether and secondly, the both of you already knew each other - you were practically best friends, after all - so you didn’t have to worry about getting along with new roommates.

And it’s proven to be a great idea, so far. You get to spend more time with Semi, bearing the struggles of college work together, and the two of you are each other’s definitions of the perfect roommate. Neither of you have any annoying habits, you get your chores done, you have weekly movie nights, and you take care of each other. The only downside you could think of is that it doesn't exactly help you with the feelings you’ve been secretly harboring for him, but you’ve managed to keep it under wraps so far. Overall, you could say it’s the best college roommate situation you could ask for.

That is, until this week.

Normally, you would leave Semi alone for the few hours of his bad mood, maybe order in his favourite food or let him choose a film for movie night to appease him, and he would be his usual self in no time at all.

However, this obviously isn’t ‘normally’ any longer. Eita has been giving you the cold shoulder since Monday, only replying to your questions with short yes’s and no’s whenever you tried to make conversation with him before returning to his room and avoiding you again. You don’t think he’s exchanged more than 10 words with you for the past 6 days and honestly, you are starting to get fed up with his attitude, but you decide to give it one last try.

It’s Saturday, meaning it’s supposed to be movie night. Semi has yet to leave his room the whole day, at least not while you aren’t in your own room. Determined, you walk up to his room and knock on the door three times.

“Eita, you there?” you call out, hovering right by the door to catch his answer.

His reply comes in the form of faint shuffling from the other side, followed by a monotonous “What?”

“It’s movie night. You wanna choose a movie?”

It’s silent for a few seconds.

“No, thanks. I’m tired tonight.”

For a moment, you freeze, not believing what you had just heard. Movie night had been a ritual that the both of you have never skipped out on unless it was absolutely necessary, such as during the exam week or when one of you happened to not be home. However, you know him well enough to know he definitely hasn’t had a busy schedule for the past few weeks that would exhaust him out of movie night. You snap out of your shock and scoff.

“Tired of what? You haven’t even done anything all day. Come out and talk to me, Semi Eita!” you snap back at him, the frustration that has been building up evident in your raised voice.

To your surprise, the door instantly click open to reveal Semi standing in front of you, a scowl on his face. “I told you I’m tired, am i not allowed to be tired now?”

“Look, I get you’re mad at something or even at me - you’re not the best at hiding your feelings, Eita - but, the least you could do is talk to me about it instead of moping around in your pissy mood all week.” The frown on your face now matching his as you all but growl your words at him.

Semi rolls his eyes and looks away from you. “It’s nothing, stop worrying about it.”

You cock an eyebrow at his weak response. “Cut the crap, Eita, I know you better than that. If it’s nothing, then you wouldn’t have ignored me for 6 days straight.”

“I don’t have to tell you everything that’s going on in my life, Y/N,” he shoots back.

“You always have before! For fuck’s sake, we’re best friends,” you argue, sighing before continuing your mini rant, “This thing is obviously bothering you, so as your friend, I’d like to help you. But I can’t do that if you won’t even be in the same room as me for more than two seconds.”

“Well, maybe we’re not as good friends as you think we are.”

You couldn’t stop the flash of pain in your chest or the tears beginning to collect behind your eyes as you clench your jaw. On a different day, maybe you would have continued to fight back against his statement, insisting that he tell you the truth. But the combination of his burning anger seething through his words and his cold treatment for the past few days is enough to render your speechless.

Unable to formulate an answer - and afraid you would actually start crying if you do - you wordlessly shake your head at him and take quick steps to your own room. You slam the door shut and immediately crawl onto your bed, throwing the sheets over yourself as you finally let the first tear escape. It doesn’t take long before the dam breaks and you have to shove your face into your pillow to muffle your sobs. A few minutes later, you hear the door to Semi’s room finally close.

That night, the living room remains dark and silent, the bowl of popcorn on the coffee table left untouched.

After the incident, both you and Semi avoid each other like the plague. You deliberately leave the apartment 20 minutes later than usual each morning for your classes to make sure you wouldn’t run into him, sometimes even skipping breakfast in order to do so, and you head straight back after your classes to hide in your room, only coming out to get meals when you know for sure Semi isn’t in the living room or kitchen. It’s a hassle - you’re messing up your sleeping and eating schedules - but you can’t bring yourself to face him. You’re not sure if you can’t or if you just don’t want to.

Deep inside, you know Semi’s words were just something he said in the heat of the moment and couldn’t be farther from the truth, but it doesn’t mean it hurt you any less. You have always confided your troubles in him and vice versa. Neither of you would let negative feelings fester between the two of you and any fights or arguments would be resolved quickly. But, this whole spat has been going on for two weeks and counting now, and it is decidedly much worse than the one-sided silent treatment from Semi that had initially sparked the dispute.

And you can’t help but begin to think that what Semi said was the truth - that he truly doesn’t consider you as close a friend as you thought you were. And how could you not wonder? After all, he hasn’t made any effort to talk to you at all.

You don’t know whether it’s a good or bad thing when you slip up one day.

The next time you and Semi are in each other’s presence is in the kitchen. You are home alone and fixing a meal for your dinner, thinking you have at least an hour before Semi returns. Left with your own thoughts to entertain you, you find yourself thinking back to the dreaded night, causing you to grimace as a painful throbbing starts up again in your chest. You notice that it’s been happening a lot ever since the argument.

Deep in your thoughts, you fail to hear the sound of the front door opening and closing or the movement of your roommate as he enters the apartment until it’s too late. You swiftly turn around to see Semi, eyes as wide as your own, standing in front of the kitchen doorway and already staring back at you. The both of you are frozen in place, unknowingly holding your breaths. It’s a comical sight, really; one you would laugh at if it were happening to someone else.

You are the first to avert your gaze, once again turning to face the stove without saying anything to him, praying he would ignore you as he had been doing for the past few weeks.

No such luck.

“Y/N.” Semi cleared his throat. You can hear the nerves in his tone, making his voice waver just slightly.

Your breath hitches once again in your throat, making you halt in the middle of stirring your pot. Other than that, you don’t indicate any signs of acknowledging him.

Semi is hesitant to approach you. He has been feeling like utter shit for weeks - ever since he started to brush you off in the first place. It was nothing but his dumb, unchecked feelings and his even dumber actions that threw you both in this situation. He doesn’t remember the last time the both of you had been this distant - no, he realises, you never have. Not since you walked up to him almost 7 years ago and introduced yourself as the new manager of the Shiratorizawa boy’s volleyball club, causing his heart to stutter as he shook your hand and gave you his name. You have only grown closer since then.

Semi sucks in a deep breath at your lack of reaction and braves himself to step closer. His chest tightens when he sees you tense up as you sense his advance towards you and he stops halfway to you. “Y/N,” he tries again.

Still no reply.

Slowly, he takes a few more steps, until you’re within arms’ reach of him. “Y/N.” His voice is much softer now, almost begging. His hand instinctively reaches out to you but pauses, hanging between the both of you.

You’re stuck on what you should do. Most of you wants to run off and scurry back into your room, but a tiny part of you wants so badly to stay and hear him out, to make amends with Semi Eita and forget this stupid fight already. You continue to look down, willing your heart to stop beating so rapidly.

Or at least you try to. The feeling of Semi’s hand brushing against your shoulder only makes your heart pound quicker.

“Can we talk?” Semi asks, uncharacteristically quiet of him.

You want to shrug his hand off and walk away, leave him in the kitchen and give him a taste of his own medicine. But, you suppose it wouldn’t fix anything and it wouldn’t bring the Semi Eita you love so much back to you. So you dare yourself to switch off the stove and face him instead, keeping your face expressionless as you wait for him to continue.

Semi squirms under your unreadable gaze. He knows he has to fix this now if he ever wants things to be normal again. He’s struggling, though, to find the right words and he’s worrying if would be enough or if it could make things worse or if you’ll ever forgive him or-

“I’m sorry,” Semi blurts out, his own voice surprising himself. He swallows a lump in his throat, trying to gauge your reaction and failing as your expression remains the same. He takes it as a sign for him to continue, and the words just tumble out of him in a flurry. “I’m sorry I was being a dick. I had no reason to, and it just escalated and I should’ve stopped it before it’s too late. And I’m sorry for what I said and for apologising so late and-”

He’s cut off by your sigh, instantly shutting him up. He thinks his heart could stop any second now, his lower lip caught in between his teeth as he anticipates your response.

“Did you mean it?”

Semi’s heart drops. He was expecting you to scold him, snap at him, or even yell at him. Any of those, he thinks, would be better than the frail words that escaped you, doubting how much you mean to him.

“No. None of it. You are my best friend. I shouldn’t have treated you like that,” he states firmly. “Please believe me, Y/N. You mean so much to me.”

You somehow manage to maintain eye contact with him. “So why did you do it?”

Semi falters. His mind knew exactly why he did it, but the words can’t leave the tip of his tongue.

The silence hangs in the air for a whole minute before you sigh again and turn around to leave, heart heavy and disappointed at his reply, or lack thereof. However, you don’t make it two steps away before a hand is wrapping around your wrist and tugging you back, making you crash into him. Before he knows it, the panic bubbling in his throat causes Semi to launch into another speech, letting the words spill out once again without a filter.

“It’s stupid,” Semi frantically tells you, looking you in the eyes, “it’s so goddamn stupid. I- I heard that guy you’ve been doing your project with confessed to you. And I couldn’t stand that when I heard it.”

Your eyebrows knit together in confusion. “What- Why-”

“I’m in love with you.”

It’s silent again before Semi continues.

“I’m so in love with you, Y/N. God, I’ve been in love with you for the past 6 years, I was just too scared to say it. And I know now that I should’ve said something sooner instead of blowing up on you and hurting you. You don’t deserve that, I’m sorry.” He exhales and opts to look at his hand, still holding onto you. His grip loosens. “I’m sorry I’ve ruined this friendship, too. The last thing I want is to lose you but I guess I went and did that anyway, huh?” he chuckles humorlessly, his voice trailing off at the end of his sentence. “I understand if you don’t want to see me anymore.”

“You’re an idiot, Semi Eita.” Your words cause him to look back up at you and his heart clenches at the tears brimming your eyes.

“I’m sor-”

Semi is cut off, but this time it was by you grabbing the front of his shirt, pulling him close to you and smashing your lips together. The shock only lasts half a second before Semi is kissing back with as much need as you are. The warmth blooms in his chest as your lips continue to capture each other’s perfectly and his body moves on its own to pull you closer into him. His mind couldn’t register any thoughts besides oh my god, this is what he’s been wanting for so long and it’s finally happening.

You pull away breathlessly, trying to catch your breath as you laugh lightly at the puzzled expression on Semi’s face. The both of you remain in the same position though, with your hands resting on his chest and his arms around your waist, holding you flush against him.

“Eita, that guy did ask me out,” you start, “but I turned him down. Because I was in love with someone else, too.”

You smile genuinely, for the first time in a while. “Semi Eita, I’m in love with you, too,” you finally declare. It feels like a weight has been lifted off your chest and in its place is the pure love and affection you have for him.

Semi laughs in relief. His mind is still reeling at your words and what just happened. All he can do is hug you tighter and bury his face into the crook of your neck. “I love you,” he murmurs, “so much.” He pulls away to look at you once more, a huge, goofy grin plastered across his face.

“Will you be mine, Y/N?”

note: oh my godd this is the longest thing i’ve written on here and i CANNOT come up with a better title i hate it :) i tried writing this in present tense instead of past tense like i usually do, so forgive me if there are a few slip ups. hope you enjoyed this!

[ taglist: @eitadesu ]

#haikyuu #haikyuu!!#haikyuu x reader #semi eita #semi x reader #semi eita x reader

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turkisherlockian · 3 years

Text

Five Years • One-Shot (Benedict Cumberbatch x Reader) [Part 1]

Summary: Y/N and Benedict have an argument and Benedict leaves. They do not see each other again until five years later, but the words that shouldn't have been said and the lies can't be taken back. And now it's time to tell the truth, Y/N was pregnant and Benedict had no idea.

Word count: 1829

Warnings: Angst, swearing, smut

A/N: Feedbacks are always appreciated and requests are open, though I can't promise that I'll write them quickly as my exams start in a month! However, I hope you enjoy this one ❤️

"It's my job, Ben! You're a professional, you know better!"

"You could have told me at least! I didn't want to see my girlfriend fucking that prick in front of EVERYONE!"

"You're exaggerating, Ben! I didn't cheat on you, I'm an actress!"

"Actress, my ass! You were only a crew member before you met me!"

I gasped, felt like I was going to choke.

"How dare you say that?! Wasn't that you who has 'seen talent in me' and forced me to continue to my acting career?"

"It seems I was wrong, a dog's cries could be more believeable!"

I was done. I couldn't stop my tears and tried not to sob in front of him. "Get out. Get the fuck out!"

He took his car keys and jacket, then left.

---

2 days later

"Sherlock star Benedict Cumberbatch was seen with a blonde woman at a pub in London. She covered her face with her bag and the couple avoided the papparazzi."

I broke down in my mother's arms, "He forgot me already, mum! It's been only 2 days and he has another girl! I thought he loved me! Was it all a lie?!"

She kissed my hair and held my face in her soft hands, "If he did, you're going to forget him as well. I can't believe that I thought he was a nice guy!"

I didn't say anything, I couldn't. Maybe I shouldn't have kicked him out, maybe I should have just... Apologised. Even though I was right. I still love him, oh God, I love him so much and it hurts to know that he did not. How could he just... Forget me in two days?

---

5 years later...

''Y/N L/N is back in front of cameras after 5 years. The actress remains still silent about why she quit acting after their break up with Benedict Cumberbatch and the thing is, they are in the same film now. The film is based on Machines Like Me by Ian McEwan. Well, now that they both are married and L/N has a daughter, we can not expect anything can we?''

Benedict threw the newspaper at somewhere in his trailer and sighed, leaning back on his bed. He was nervous. It has been 5 years since he last saw her or heard from her. They were childish in the beggining to never contact again and then... They got married.

He got up as his manager knocked the door, ''Benedict, she just arrived.. Thought you'd like to say hi.''

''I'll be there in five, thank you.''

He washed his face with cold water, and took a deep breath. Checking his phone, a sarcastic smile appeared on his face. He called her, his wife, for 8 times and the text he received said ''What???''

Just ignoring the text messsage, he put it back into his pocket and left his trailer.

And there she was.

Just like how she was 5 years ago. Only difference was her age, and oh... She had a ring on her finger. He knew it already, but it made him feel strange. He could be the one who married her, who became her baby's daddy. But now, he was struggling to keep his own marriage together with a woman who cheated on him...

The moment she turned towards him, when their eyes met they both were brought back to 5 years ago. All the good and bad memories they had, the way they seperated. And she smiled at him which woke him up out of the trance. ''Hey...''

He scratched his scalp, ''Hi...''

''It's been a long time.''

''Yes... How are you?''

''Oh come here, Ben...'' She knew what exactly was going on, and she waited enough to tell him that it was okay. She hugged him tightly and he hugged her back, not as tight as she did in fear of hurting her.

''I missed you.'' He said with a small smile, rubbing her arms. ''I missed you too.'' She touched his cheek, not really sure about what made her do that, but none of them found it weird. It was like seeing your best friend from high school years later.

''I know I'm a little late, shall we start practising?'' He nodded as they sat on the porch and started to do some script reading.

---

''...I don't care, Jess, I can wait for you forever.''

''But you shouldn't, you have to move on, Charles...'' A tear rolled down her cheek as she held his face in her hands. It reminded them of when he said a dog's cries could be more believable than her's. He took her hand into his and kissed her palm, ''No, my love... I can't.'' He cupped her face and kissed her without hesitation, like he has been waiting for this moment since years. She was frozen for a moment when she felt his lips on her's once again, and slightly moaned at the feeling. That was when he cried along with her, as he kissed her with more passion and now she was kissing him back. The kiss should've lasted shorter but the director didn't want to interrupt them because he knew what was going on and it was real.

They pulled back and looked into each other's eyes just like the script said, until the director ended shooting the scene. She pressed her lips in order to not cry and forced a small smile, then felt his hand rubbing her back to comfort her. He wasn't feeling as bad as she did, maybe it was because he didn't know the truth... Yet.

---

Everyone went to have dinner except Y/N. She just made an excuse and stayed in her trailer. Spent a few hours on her own, and cried a little bit. She was about to call her daughter when she heard a knock on the door.

Sniffing, she got up from the bed and opened the door... It was Benedict with a pizza box in his hands. ''I know you love pizza...''

She grinned, ''Come in.''

They both sat on the bed silently until she said ''Thank you for pizza, but I have eaten already. You can eat it if you want...''

''I have eaten as well.''

''Okay...''

''I'm sorry.''

She frowned, ''What for?''

''For everything I did earlier... I mean, years ago. It was so childish and a big mistake . I know I'm late but... I just wanted you to know that I am sorry, I truly am.''

''I'm sorry, too, Ben. We both were wrong... I should've told you.''

''And I should have not shouted at you like that and... Said very bad things.''

''You were right.''

''No, I wasn't! Y/N, you are an amazing actress and it haunts me every night that you quit acting because of me.''

She chuckled, ''I didn't quit acting because of you... It was because I had a baby.''

He sighed, ''I've heard that you did... How old is she now?''

That was the tricky question. Instead of simply telling him, she asked ''Would you like to see her?''

''Yeah, I would love to.''

She showed her daughter's photos from her phone, but something was wrong. She looked a lot like... Him. With ginger-ish hair and blue eyes, he couldn't help but think if she was his baby.

''She doesn't look like you.''

''Yeah... Like her fath--.''

''Can I see him as well?'' He asked harshly.

''I um... Deleted his photos because we are going to divorce.''

''Well, I'm sorry to hear that. How old is she, Y/N?''

Her eyes were welled up quickly and even before she could say something, he stood up and moved his fingers through his hair, trying to stay calm and not to make a mistake like he did years ago. Tears were forming in his eyes, she couldn't have done that could she?

''Y/N...'' He was hurt, he knew it, she was his baby. ''Tell me she isn't...''

''She is!'' She looked up at him, crying. ''She is your daughter, I--''

''For God's sake, Y/N, how could you hide it from me?! How did you do this to her?!''

''How did I do this to her? You could have known if you hadn't left!''

''You told me to FUCK OFF!''

''I DIDN'T KNOW I WAS PREGNANT BACK THEN AND YOU GOT MARRIED IN TWO MONTHS! DO YOU KNOW WHAT I'VE BEEN THROUGH? I NEVER STOPPED LOVING YOU AND I WAS CARRYING YOUR CHILD, OUR CHILD, AND YOU GOT MARRIED!'' She stood up as well and continued, ''WHAT WAS I SUPPOSED TO DO, BEN? I WAS ALONE, I WAS SCARED, I WAS YOUNG! AND I DIDN'T WANT TO BE A HOMEWRECKER!''

Tears were streaming down on both of their cheeks, whilst Y/N was revealing a secret no one knew except her so-called husband best friend and her mother. Benedict was shocked. He had a baby girl, he was a father.

''And if you had loved me, you wouldn't have had a girlfriend in two days.'' She sobbed and covered her face with her hands, ''I was furious, I was... God I was so stupid! Y/N, look at me...''

He pulled her hands down and held her face, "I never stopped loving you, either. I always regretted every single thing I did, I said but when I realized it all you were married...''

''I was married with Jason.''

''What? Jason?''

''Yes. Of course It was a fake marriage. We divorced after a short while...''

He was about to break down, ''Does she know who...''

''I promised her that she was going to meet her daddy when she grows up.''

''Oh God...'' He started to sob, and she hugged him tightly, ''I'm so sorry, Ben...''

He didn't say anything for a while and cried his eyes out into her chest , and then said ''I want to talk to her.''

She nodded and sniffled as a smile appeared on her face. She took her phone in her hands which were shaking, making a call through Skype. ''She's allowed to play on her iPad today, she should answer soon...''

Y/N looked at Benedict before pressing the call button. It ringed, and ringed, but she didn't pick up. ''She must be sleeping...''

''Mummy!''

''Lizzy...'' She tried not to cry as she spoke, ''What are you doing, baby?''

Benedict was amazed. Amazed by how beautiful his little girl was, how high pitched her voice was. He felt like he was done with living, and could die happily but not before breathing her soft curls' scent. His little baby... Lizzy.

''I just brushed my teeth, and wore my pyjamas.''

''I'm so proud of you...'' She said as she wiped her tears, ''I want you to meet someone.''

''Okay... Who is she?''

She giggled, ''It's not a she, darling...'' And she gave the phone to Benedict, his hands were shaking.

''Hello, Lizzy. My name is Benedict... I'm your daddy.''

---

Would love some feedback pls 🥺❤️ wanna read part 2? 🔥😈

#benedict cumberbatch x reader #benedict cumberbatch fanfiction #benedict cumberbatch smut #benedict cumberbatch oneshot #benedict cumberbatch #benedict cucumber #benedict cabbagepatch #marvel #ig #sherlock #maybe #dr strange #nothing else comes to my mind rn #pls stop reading

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srirachvbi · 4 years

Text

quarantined with you ! (part one)

a/n: this is literally just headcanons on how some of the guys would react to being stuck at home during quarantine lmao (MANGA SPOILERS) also some of these are shorter than the others because i am... lazy ! i’ll try to post more headcanons with different characters for this soon but this has been sitting in my drafts for a while so i wanted to post it Warning(s): mentions of sex but they’re brief and not that detailed, cursing

Bokuto Koutarou

Oh my god this literal CHILD would be a pain in the ass in the beginning

The season had been cancelled due to Miss Rona and he was completely heartbroken

He wasn’t even allowed to go to the gym or even the courts to practice !!

You two didn’t live together yet (you two had been looking at apartments but couldn’t find one that suited either of you at the same time, but your apartment was probably big enough to fit the two of you already) but the minute that quarantine was set in place he literally showed up at your door with his belongings

Surprise! you got yourself a roommate now because he can’t stand being by himself in his lonesome apartment

LETS PRETEND HE PROBABLY DOESN’T HAVE A HUGE PENTHOUSE BECAUSE HE’S A RICHASS VOLLEYBALL PLAYER ITS CUTER IF HE’S LIVING WITH YOU

It’s not like you’re complaining though-- he’s literally your big baby

Since he can’t go to the gym or the courts, he’d probably go on a really long morning run

A lot of the time when he wants to run, he’d try to force you to go with him because he wants to spend time with you :(

LMAO sike-- bitch he THOUGHT you’d even think about getting out of bed at SIX IN THE MORNING????

He actually convinced you to go with him once and you refused to go ever again after almost losing a lung

I’m sorry luvs but Bokuto can’t be trusted in the kitchen so you’re either ordering food or cooking for the both of you

He tries his best tho!!

Since you two have the most time in the world tho, you actually try to teach him how to cook (yikes good luck)

There was a mishap where your apartment almost got burned down but after a while he got his shit together

You: I’m gonna kill myself if you burn down my apartment Kou

Him: haha don’t kill yourself youre so sexy <3

You: perish <3

Honestly, he’d try his best to help you out or cheer you up tho!!

Like, he’s kinda dense and doesn’t really know how to do any household chores but if you’re not feeling great, he’d go out of his way to figure out how to cheer you up

If you’re sad about being stuck inside? Just wait lmao you’re gonna get literally TACKLED cause he !! does !! not !! tolerate !! sadness !!

You guys would probably do tik tok dances and trends because you’re bored

He’d throw it back on you ngl

After a while, Bo would probably adapt to quarantine and you definitely showed him how to clean a few things so eventually he started to be helpful!!

Weekly facetimes or zoom calls with the other MSBY Black Jackals players because all of them are pressed about quarantine

Bo would probably go back to his apartment every now and then whenever you needed space to do your work/school work!!

Or he’d bother the shit out of you and complain if you didn’t give him the attention but unimportant

Oh and

y’all would probably get it on like... almost every single night

He just seems like the kind of person to be horny since he’s bored

Your poor bed :(

Baths afterwards were the best part though because !! he’s all warm and bulky

LIKE IMAGINE JUST BEING IN HIS ARMS AJFKLJDF

I’m a Bokuto Simp

n e ways

he’d try to teach you volleyball if you had enough free time (ofc you do) because he gets so bored

If you already know how to play, he’d probably just toss it back and forth because he doesn’t want to hurt his precious s/o with his POWERFUL ass spikes godDAMN

So, yeah Kou would probably be a pain in the ass at first but he’d definitely settle down with the fact that he’s stuck inside with his cuteass s/o

Him: hey did you know that I love you?

You: SIMP-- wait no, don’t cry baby ily2

Sakusa Kiyoomi

Lmao sorry luvs you ain’t gonna see him <3

The MINUTE he found out that there was a virus, this bitch FLED to his apartment

Like, he stocked up on a TON of supplies and dipped

He literally pulled a “went out to buy some milk” and disappeared off the planet

Since you’re his s/o, he wouldn’t completely shut you out but he would NOT let you into his apartment unless you avoided all human contact for 14 days and showed no signs of Miss Rona

Honestly, you wouldn’t see him that much because he just... doesn’t want anyone near him

You: :((( bby

Him: Stay away bitch <3

You two would facetime a lot tho and he’d just nag you about staying healthy because he doesn’t want his s/o to get sick

If you ran out of masks, he’d literally just stick some in a bag outside of his front door and would tell you to pick them up because he will not leave his apartment

He’s the reason that the stores have like... no hand sanitizer

You: don’t be shy !! give some !!

Him: I do not see 👁👄👁

Jk no, he’d put little care packages outside of his apartment for you that are full of cleaning supplies cause he wants you to be healthy

If he has anything delivered to his house, I wouldn’t be surprised if he pulled out a hazmat suit and sprayed that bitch down

He’d definitely call you late at night and the two of you would fall asleep on the call !!

He’d begrudgingly answer the MSBY zoom calls

Atsumu: Omi Omi~ I’m surprised you haven’t gotten broken up with yet. if I were y/n i would probably drop your ass <3

Him: I hope you die <3

Okay but once he realizes you’re perfectly healthy, he’ll allow you into his apartment but he forces you to shower before touching him

It’s okay-- you finally get to cuddle your germaphobe bf <3

Okay but he do be kinda horny in quarantine because isn’t everyone so you two seeing each other again was a TRIP

Have fun luvs <3

Kuroo Tetsurou

Don’t be shy Furudate, tell us where Kuroo is in the final arc <3

Since I have no clue what canon Kuroo is doing, let’s just say he just has a regular job idk

Since he’s not deemed to be an essential worker, he’s stuck at home with your stupidass <3

Jk- he’s happy to be able to spend time with you

Definitely spends a lot of his day playing video games with Kenma since Kenma also has a ton of time now (Kenma’s just working from home now and has conference calls every now and then)

I believe that this man would be a decent cook so he’d definitely help or at least convince you to just order some food lmao

You two would spend the first few weeks just watching movies and cuddling or some cute shit idk

Probably horny as fuck so yall would be busy for a bit

You two would have the stupidest conversations in the middle of the day while you two were just staring at the ceiling

You: if cows ruled the world, would they drink human milk?

Him: omg you’re onto something there

Idk you’d probably be roasting the shit out of each other too

Him: did i ever tell you that you look like a rat baby?

You: perish <3

You’d take turns with who would cook dinner and who would clean it up because there needs to be a system or else youre both not eating or not having an apartment that is tolerable to live in

Okay but like... I think that he’d look at those cooking tik toks and would be like “i’m going to make this bitch”

does it work? sometimes. does it taste good? give or take

Like, some of them SLAP but others just... don’t look anything like the end result that the video showed

he’d definitely try to make you work out with him and sometimes it worked

A lot of the time tho, you’d just laugh at him

You: I’ll just watch you here dw luv

Him: I know you wanna look at my arms wackass

He’d definitely spend hours upon hours playing video games with Kenma

Like,,, you wouldn’t see him move for hours but every now and then you’d hear him scream LMAO

Honestly it would be pretty fun to be quarantined with this bitch

idk he’s not gonna burn your house down, not be able to clean shit, and he’d also be a lot of fun to joke around with so I see nothing wrong with this bitch <3

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fictionalabyss · 3 years

Text

Eight kids and counting.

Pairing : Garth x Reader, Hailey -15(OC), Hunter -13 (OC), Twins Connor & Coen - 8 (OCs), Twins Amber & Aaron - 5 (OCs), Jackson - 3 (OC)

Word count : 1,909

Written for : @spnabobingo

Square : Pups.

Warnings : A/B/O, Pregnancy, breeding kink mentioned in passing, Heat (mentioned), children roughhousing/not listening to mom, minor injury, almost a fire, pregnancy brain. Fluffy.

Beta’d by : @artemisthebadger

Masterlist • Patreon • Ko-fi.

SPN A/B/O Bingo Round 5 Masterlist.

“Mommy!” Amber, your 5 year old daughter, whined from next to you as you tried to set the dining room table.

“Boys..”

“Mom!” she tugged on your shirt.

“Boys, please..” They were running, fast as they could, chasing each other around the house showing off how fast they were getting. Your 8 year old twins coming into their abilities with reckless abandon, and bringing the other children into their shenanigans as much as possible.

“Mommy, Aaron he-”

“Hunter, can you please get them to stop before they-” You heard a crash, one twin yelling that he was okay while the other yelled it wasn’t him.

“I got it, mom!” Came your oldest son, now 13 years old.

“Mommy!” Amber yanked on your shirt and you heard a stitch tear at the strain. “Aaron he-”

The fire alarm sounded and you yanked her hand off your shirt a little harshly as you ran for the kitchen, cursing the whole way. “Shit, shit, shit, shit!” You burst back into the room to find Hailey, your oldest child at 15, pulling dinner from the oven.

“Sorry mom.” she winced at the roast now charred black.

“Shit..” Your shoulders dropped.

“Mommy, you keep saying bad words.” Amber scolded.

“I’m sorry honey. And for whatever Aaron did-”

“He gave my new dolly a haircut.” she held up the doll that had no head and claw marks down it’s front. “With his claws.”

“AARON!” you called out in a firm tone.

“I didn’t do anything! She’s lying!” he called back from wherever he was.

“Mom?” Hailey tried to get your attention. “Did you have something in the other oven, too?”

“SHIT!” you yanked the oven mits from her hands and pulled open the oven, smoke billowing out and making you cough.

Firm hands yanked you back and pulled the burning hot tray from your hands and tossed it onto the counter. “Hailey, go open the windows. Hunter, you get the door. Amber, honey, you bring mommy out back for some fresh air okay.” he crouched down to her eye level. “The smoke isn’t good for the baby.”

“Aye Aye, Daddy.” She saluted him before taking your hand and leading you towards the door. “Do you think you can fix her, mommy? Or do I need a new dolly again.”

You sighed. “I’ll see what I can do.” You glanced down and she smiled. “And I’m sorry I didn’t listen when you tried to tell me.”

“It’s okay, mommy. I’ll just cut his hair with my claws.”

“Please don’t.” you groaned, stepping out into the fresh air. She gave you an innocent grin that you knew not to trust. “You’re supposed to be the good one, Amber.” you teased as you dropped to sit in the porch swing, hand moving over your large stomach. “Our little angel, remember?” you poked her nose and her whole face scrunched up making you chuckle.

“Is Aaron the evil twin?” You cocked an eyebrow at that. “Hailey says that there’s always a good twin and a bad twin. That Hunter was so bad he ate his!”

“Hailey!” you called out and shot an accusatory glare at the doorway to the kitchen, despite her not being there.

“Then tell Hunter to stay out of my room!” she yelled back from inside the kitchen.

“Then stop taking my things!” Hunter shot back.

“Come on, guys.” you groaned, letting your head fall down. You heard footsteps approaching, and you didn’t even need to look up to know who it was. “No more kids, Garth. I swear to god. Eight is more than enough.”

“You weren’t exactly stopping me.” When you looked up, he had a smirk on his face. “In fact, you were rather encouraging.”

“I’m sorry.”

His eyebrows came together in confusion. “About what? About encouraging me so many times? Wouldn’t change a damn thing.” he was smiling wide again.

“About dinner.” you pouted up at him, and his smile fell. “I burnt it all, I- shit!” you shot up from your seat. “I had things on the stove, I-”

“I turned them off, relax.” he chuckled, stepping closer and bringing you into a hug.

“Did I ruin them, too?”

“No, they were just... overdone with love?”

“I ruined them.” you started to cry.

“Hey, hey, don’t cry, it’s okay. It’s just dinner, it’s no big deal.” Garth ran one hand down your hair while the other went up the back of your shirt spreading warmth in its wake. The feel of his skin against yours was calming. “Take a deep breath for me, breathe it in.”

Taking a deep breath, you let the smell of him fill your nose. He smelled of sweat, since he hadn’t showered yet, wood, gunpowder and “Chocolate?” your head snapped up to meet his eyes.

“Ruined the surprise.” he teased, before pulling a chocolate bar out of his pocket. “I know how bad you’ve been craving this the last few days.”

“They don’t even have these here..”

“Well, I found one.” he brought his lips to yours in a sweet kiss. “Feel better?”

“I will when the pack you’ve got me building starts to listen.” you teased. “It’s hard enough with my brain all scattered, but with the boys-”

“I know. I’ll talk to them.”

“No more, Garth. Two sets of twins already, the other three kids, and now this one.” you looked down at your stomach. “This is the last one.”

“Hunter was supposed to be the last one.” he teased. “And then you went into heat, and-”

“I remember.” you groaned, letting your forehead fall to rest against his chest.

“Amber and Aaron were suppose to be the last, as well.” he teased. “Second set of twins, you didn’t want to risk another. Then I came home one night.” Garth’s lips were against the top of your head as he spoke. “And you-”

“I remember.” you sighed softly, and could feel his lips spread into a smile.

“What happened?” You groaned softly, having all but forgot Amber was outside with you as Garth sent you down memory lane. “What’s heat, Daddy?”

“We’ll talk when you’re older.”

“I wanna know now!” she stomped her foot. “I’ll ask Hailey or Hunter.” she skipped off into the house.

“Aaron messed up her new doll again.”

“Yeah, I saw it.” he sighed.

“Connor and Coen are getting faster. They’ve been teasing Jackson again.”

“And put a hole in the wall, breaking a few family pictures in the process.” Your head shot up. “Hunter’s cleaning up the mess, and I’ll get the boys to help me fix it all tomorrow.”

“No more pups, Garth.”

He smiled softly, giving you another tender kiss. “I know. Go eat your chocolate on the couch, I’ll order us all some pizza before I shower, okay? Anything you want, it’s yours, my love.” You smiled up at him, a smile filled with as much love and adoration as he always showered on you. “Except that. You said no more kids and this one isn’t even out yet.” he teased, making you roll your eyes. “Mind out of the gutter.”

“Mom? Why is Amber asking us about heats?” Hunter asked from the doorway, making you groan, your forehead against Garth’s chest again as he laughed.

“THAT’S DISGUSTING!” came Ambers yell, while Hailey laughed hysterically.

“Hailey!”

“Heats is kissing!?” Amber came out, shooting you and Garth glares, and Garth laughed even harder. “I never want a heat.” she spat. “Boys are gross.”

“You’re gross!” yelled Aaron.

“No more.” you muttered to Garth one last time.

Pizza had arrived, and feeding time at the zoo started. The kids practically shoving each other to fill their plates and rush back to the living room to get good seats and not get stuck sitting on the floor. You watched from your spot on the couch as they rushed into the room, sometimes arguing over which spot was who’s, who had dibs and if dibs were even allowed.

This was why you didn’t let them eat in here every day. To be fair though, the dinner table wasn’t much different.

“Sit.” At the command from their father, everyone settled down. Garth all but smiled triumphantly to himself before walking over and sitting next to you, handing you the plate he’d made for you.

“Never leave.” you pleaded, making him laugh.

“Who picked the movie?”

“Hunter.” Everyone answered at once.

“Alright, Connor’s turn next.”

“Yes!” Connor pumped his fist. “Get ready for blood and guts!”

“Coen’s turn is next.” Garth countered.

“Hey!” Connor turned, shooting his father a glare while Coen grinned happily. Connor turned his glare on his twin and gave him a shove.

“Boys.” Again, at their father’s firm tone, they stopped. “Hunter, turn it on.”

The plates were all stacked on the coffee table. Discarded crusts, chicken wing bones, and crumbled napkins formed a mountain on the top one. The kids were all focused on the action movie that played on the screen. Amber ducked into Hunter every time an explosion made her jump, while her twin brother Aaron was on the edge of his seat with wide eyes.

Jackson, your three year old, was half asleep in Hailey’s lap where she sat on the floor with her back against the couch. Connor and Coen were on the floor as well, punching and shoving each other with excitement every time something happened.

You, you had your arm wrapped around Garth’s, your head on his shoulder, enjoying the feel of his hand gently stroking your thigh. You took a deep breath, breathing him in once again, and let out a soft moan.

Garth chuckled.

“You seem happy.” he whispered quietly, his lips brushing your head.

“I am. It’s quiet, and nice. I love it.” you looked around the room at your pups, at how sweet they could be once the chaos died down.

“You said no more.” When you looked up at him, he smiled knowingly. “I can already smell that your mind is changing.” he gripped your thigh and you licked your lips.

“We’ll see in a few years.”

“Guess I’m not the only one with a breeding kink.” his voice was lower than before and in your ear.

“Don’t start, Garth.” you warned, eyes falling shut as a wave of arousal coursed through you.

“I’m so glad I found the perfect woman to carry my pups for me.” he stroked at your chin before pulling you in for a kiss.

“EW! MOM! ARE YOU HEATING!?”

You couldn’t help but laugh against Garth’s lips. “No, honey. I just really love daddy.”

“I love daddy too!”

“Then come here, princess.” Garth opened his arms, and Amber jumped down from her spot on the couch with Hunter to rush to her father’s arms. As soon as he had her in his arms, he began to pepper kisses all over her face.

“Daddy!” she shrieked as they both laughed and she tried to wiggle free. You giggled as well as you watched them.

“Oh, god.” Hailey groaned, letting her head fall back.

“What?” Hunter asked, looking down at his sister, who’s shoulder was just inches from his leg.

“That’s moms ‘I want another one’ face.”

Hunter winced. “I’m moving out.”

“We’re going to have to just to make room.” Hailey laughed. “Eight kids and counting.” she sighed.

“Better not be twins again.” Hunter muttered.

“I heard that!” Aaron shot his older brother a glare. “Now shut up, I’m watching the movie.”

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atlafan · 4 years

Text

My Everything - Part Nineteen

A Take it Slow Sequel

What happens with Harry and Y/N after he proposes? How will the two navigate the engaged life while also continuing to juggle their jobs, friends, and families? Let’s find out.

Warnings: fluff, slight angst, and smut

Words: 11.5K

a/n: I can’t believe this is the second to last part!

Masterpost

You always really liked the beginning of November. The leaves had changed, and it was the middle of the semester. You also, finally, looked and felt your best for the first time in a while. Since Jessica was over six months, she was able to go to day care at the college with Jack. Harry really missed bringing her with him to work, but at least he still had Buster. You couldn’t believe that next fall Jack would be going to preschool. There was a nice place in Milton you and Harry found that you’d enroll him in once spring rolls around.

At the end of your work day, you go to pick the kids up from daycare. Jack was coloring with Ryan, like always. You were happy to see they had stayed such good friends. You told yourself you’d do your best to keep them in contact next year since they’d be going to different preschools.

“Mumma!” Jack exclaims.

“Get your backpack, sweetie, we gotta grab your sister from the other room.” You bend down and kiss his forehead. He holds your hand as you walk over to the next room where the kept the babies. “Ah, there’s my sweet girl. How was she Anthony?”

“A doll, as usual. She giggled a bunch, and took a great nap.”

“That’s what I love to hear. Hi, angel.” You cuddle her to your chest. She was very excited to see you. “Let’s get you both in the car, come on.”

Jack is patient as usual while he waits for you to get Jessica situated in her car seat. You pick him up to put him in his. You furrow your brows at your backseat.

“How the hell am I supposed to do this with three?” You ask yourself. “I’d need to get a car with another row of seats.” You sigh and get into the front seat.

“Three what, Mumma?”

“Oh, nothing, baby doll. Mummy’s just talking to herself.” You laugh.

You and Harry hadn’t really talked about another kid in a while. Things in the house had finally gotten into a decent routine. You were almost scared to bring it up.

“Jack?”

“Yes, Mumma?”

“Do you like having a little sister so far?”

“Yeah.” He shrugs. “I just don’t like when she gets loud.”

“Like when she cries for a long time?”

“Mhm.”

“I don’t like it either.” You chuckle. “Her bottom teeth are coming in, that’s why she’s been crying a little more than usual. It can be a little uncomfortable on her gums.”

“Did I do that when I was baby?”

“Mhm, we used to freeze carrots for you to gnaw on.” You shake your head at yourself. “Sometimes we’d throw a wet rag in the freezer too, anything to soothe you, honey. You used to bite on Daddy’s fingers too.”

“I did?!”

“Yeah.” You laugh. “It was cute. Jessica hasn’t seemed to want to do that. The teething rings work just fine.”

“I like her.” He looks at his sister and smiles.

“Me too…would you ever want another?”

“Sister?”

“Or a brother…I don’t really get to decide…”

“I want her to get big so we can play.”

“I want the complete opposite. I want you small forever.”

“But I’m a big boy, Mumma.”

“Yes.” You sigh. “A very big boy. Dr. Philips thinks you’re going to be very tall, and your sister may end up a shrimp like me.”

“Daddy’s tall.”

“Daddy’s very tall.” You smile.

You liked your chats with Jack on the way home from work. You’ll miss them a lot once he’s in preschool, but you didn’t need to think about that just yet. You hit a little bit of traffic on the way home. You’re grateful when you pull into the garage. You get Jessica into your arms and Jack out of his car seat.

“Hang your backpack up please when you get up into the kitchen, and then wash up for snacky.” You tell him. “I gotta feed this one too. Are you hungry, darling?” Jessica makes a noise and you nod.

You get jack some cut up grapes and then get Jessica a bubby. Once she’s burped you set her down in her bouncy so you can go use the bathroom.

“Wanna see what I colored today, Mumma?”

“Of course I do!” You plop on the floor with him in the living room so he can show you his many drawings. “Is this our family, honey?”

“Mhm.” He beams. “There’s Daddy, you, me, Jessica, and Buster.”

“Are you riding Buster?”

“Yeah.” He giggles.

“We have to put this on the fridge for Daddy to see. He’s going to love it.” You get up and find a magnet and some space to put the picture up.

A little while later just as you’re preparing dinner while also going over ABC’s with Jack, you hear the door slam downstairs. You sigh heavily, especially when you hear Harry stomping up the stairs.

“Daddy!” Jack exclaims. You also hear Jessica getting excited from her high-chair.

Harry doesn’t even come into the kitchen. He just grumbles and goes right into the bathroom to wash up. He comes into the kitchen when he’s done, and looks at you.

“Hi.” He grunts and opens the fridge to grab a beer.

“Our son is waiting.” You nod over to Jack.

“Hey, buddy.” Harry goes over and kisses the top of Jack’s head. He looks over at Jessica and can’t help but smile when he sees her smile. He gives her a kiss as well. “What’s for dinner?”

“Roasted veggies and rice. Should be done any minute. Are you alright?”

“M’fine.” You roll your eyes at him and turn around to look at the veggies through the glass in the oven. “Shouldn’t do that in front of him, not a great habit to pick up.”

“Neither is coming home angry, and immediately grabbing a beer out of the fridge.” You cross your arms and look at him.

“Touché.” He smirks. “I had a long day. Not something I can really discuss in front of little ears.”

“Later then?”

“Yes.”

You nod and get dinner plated up. Harry helps feed Jessica while you make sure Jack’s veggies aren’t too hot. He really liked when you roasted veggies, and you were thankful he didn’t just want hotdogs all the time.

“Mm, delicious, babe.” Harry says.

“Thank you.” You whistle for Buster. “Come eat, baby.” He barks and eats the food you put out for him.

After dinner you and Harry give Jack and Jessica a bath. You lull Jessica to sleep, but Jack is allowed to stay up in bed a little longer. You come into his room and see Harry reading with him.

“Time for bed.” You say. You kiss Jack on the forehead and so does Harry. “Night, angel.”

You both creep out of his room and go downstairs. You both sit on the couch.

“Alright, tell me what happened.”

“I have two interns this semester, remember?” You hum your response. “Well, I couldn’t find either of them for a hot second, so I go to the back to see if maybe one of them was in the bathroom and maybe the other was in the storage closet. No one was in the bathroom, so I go to check the storage closet, and I see it’s locked. I grab Mariah and ask her why it would be locked during the day, and she had no idea, so I grab my keys and I open the door to find the two of them pulling their clothes back on.”

“Stop!” You gasp. “You’re kidding.”

“Nope.” He shakes his head. “Full on fuck fest in my storage closet. Even we haven’t fucked in there.” He scoffs. “So, I obviously had to let them both go, but that means they may not get college credit, which I sort of feel bad about…they might be able to get one or two credits since they completed half the semester. I have to come to your campus tomorrow to speak with a dean or something. And now I’m down two people right before the holidays. I’m gonna get super busy.” He sighs.

“What about a paid thing?”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, you could hire a couple of other college students and pay them hourly or something. It could just be a seasonal thing for the holidays. You’re getting new interns for the spring anyways, right?”

“True…it would only be for a couple of months I’d need to pay them. Do you know any responsible students looking for work?”

“Oh, sure, tons. I can send an email to the film club and see if any of those guys wanna make a quick buck.”

“I can’t believe I have to deal with this.” He groans.

“It’s kinda funny when you think about it.” You chuckle and he glares at you. “Oh, come on!”

“Little rabbits couldn’t keep it in their pants.”

“You remember being that age, Harry. Even in your twenties, you were like that.” You laugh.

“I wouldn’t have risked college credit like that.” He shakes his head. “Morons.”

“Did they at least feel bad?”

“They did, and they were really embarrassed. Isaac spoke to them mostly, I was too aggravated and Mariah had a client coming in.” He sighs. “I just can’t keep them on after something like that, you know?”

“No, it makes perfect sense to let them go. They need to know there are consequences to their actions. You’re doing the right thing, babe.”

“Thanks. Sorry I came home grumpy. Usually I can cool down on the train home, but everything was pissing me off, and then there was traffic from the train station back here.”

“I hit traffic on the way home too. I wonder if there was an accident or something.”

“Who the fuck knows, it’s Boston, there’s always traffic.”

“Poor thing.” You pout at him. “Come here, come lay with me.”

You lean back and rest your head on the arm of the couch, and Harry rests his head on your chest. You wrap your arms around him and rub his head and back.

“How was your day?” He mumbles.

“Good, my students are starting in on their projects. Some of them, uh, are taking bets on if or when I’ll get pregnant again.” You laugh nervously.

“Seems like an incentive thing to make bets about.” He looks up at you. “What if you weren’t able to have more?”

“I’m very honest with them, especially the students that have had me for years. They’re fine. I thought it was sweet. They like seeing pictures of our family and stuff.”

“They just like when you go on your little tangents.” He chuckles.

“What students wouldn’t?” You kiss his forehead. He props himself up to look at you. “What?”

“Your heart is, like, racing.”

“Aw, isn’t that sweet? Even after all this time you still make my heart flutter.”

“Y/N.” He sighs with a smile. “Are you trying to tell me something?” He thinks for a moment and then gasps. “Are you pregnant?”

“No! God, no…but…I’ve been thinking about maybe…what if it was time to try again?”

“I feel like we just got a routine together. Everything’s gonna change next year with Jack going to preschool. Our schedules are going to need to adjust a lot, and you wanna add a baby to the mix of that? You were pregnant during our five year anniversary so we couldn’t go anywhere. This April is gonna be our five year wedding anniversary, I was sorta hoping to take a vacation.”

“While I’m teaching? We’d have to go in March when I’m on spring break.”

“Plus, Jessica’s first birthday will be in April. We’re gonna be really busy. Jack’s still too little to help out.” He sighs. “I don’t know, the idea of it just really stresses me out.” He gets off you to sit up, and you sit up as well. “And you’ve been talking about how much you’ve loved the way you look lately, you wanna start changing all of that?”

“I told you before, I’d do it over and over.” You look down at your lap and twiddle your thumbs. “You…really don’t want another?”

“It’s not that I don’t, I just don’t think right now is a good time.”

“Well, it wouldn’t be right now.”

“Y/N.” He puts his hand over yours and you look up at him. “You know what I mean.”

“Even if I was pregnant during our anniversary, we could still go somewhere. We could go away for a weekend or something. I’d still have fun.”

“Not if you were nauseous and sweaty. Been through it twice with you now, I know how you are.”

“I just feel like I’m playing beat the clock or something. Like, I’m thirty-two, so if we got pregnant soon, then I’d be thirty-three probably when the baby’s born, and then I think that would be enough. I feel like three is the magic number. How nice for Jessica to be so close in age with a sibling, and Jack could find little ways to help if he wanted.”

“We’d be giving up our guest room.”

“We do have my office down here that could be converted if we put a small pull out in there.”

“You want my mother to sleep on a pull out?!”

“No, she could have our bed. Plus, those bedrooms are large upstairs, Jessica could share with the baby. We have one of each, so either way two could share as they got older. I’m…a little shocked you’re not jumping at the chance.”

“I just think we need to be realistic. That’s a third college fund we’d need to invest in.”

“The timing’s never going to be good, Harry.” You cross your arms. “And so what if it’s a third college fund? Do you know how much money I’ll be making by the time the kids would even be old enough to go to college? I’m set to teach two courses online this January, you know that money goes right towards those accounts.”

“I just don’t understand why you want to throw off the balance we have right now. There’s four of us, we have one of each…why do we need another?”

“Harry.” Your bottom lip starts to quiver. “I just have so much love to give, and I wanna give it to another baby.”

“You’re already spread so thin! Jack still fights for your attention anytime you hold Jessica for longer than five minutes. Now you want him to compete with two?”

“Are you sure it’s not you who wants to compete for my attention?”

“Oh, please.” He scoffs.

“Besides, I thought you liked me when I’m pregnant.” You pout.

“I like you all the time, that’s not fair.” He cups your cheek. “As much as I love the idea of having a ton of sex to get you pregnant, I just…can I have some time to think about?”

“Okay.” You lean into his touch.

“I know that’s not the answer you wanted.”

“You’re not saying no, so I’ll take it for now.” You kiss his palm and stand up. You stretch a little, really putting yourself on display for him. “Think I’m gonna turn in.”

“Me too.” He yawns. “I’m fucking exhausted.”

You both do your nightly routines and get into bed. You roll over and Harry wraps himself around you. You wanted to have sex right now, but you didn’t want him to think it was just because you wanted to make a baby. You didn’t want him thinking that was the only reason you wanted him. Maybe once he falls asleep you could go take care of yourself in the bathroom or something. No, you didn’t want some piece of plastic to get you off, you wanted him. You roll over to face him and see he’s already asleep. Of course, just like a man to fall asleep so easily. He pulls you in closer to him, but you pry away, flipping onto your back.

“You’re restless.” He mumbles with his eyes closed.

“Sorry.”

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.”

“Are you mad at me?” He opens an eye to look at you.

“Of course not.” You look at him. “I’m just…in the mood.”

“Because of the baby talk?” He smirks.

“No…just…in general.” You roll back on your side to face him. You grab one of his hands and place it between your legs. He grunts when he feels how wet you are. “Just want you, babe.” You whimper as he presses his palm against you.

“I can see that.”

He slips two fingers inside you, and you grind against him. He keeps a slow pace, just enjoying the way you feel around him. His thumb presses circles into your clit. You press your forehead to his chest to try to muffle your moans. Your nails scratch at his shoulders, causing him to groan.

“Fuck it.” He retracts his fingers from you and pushes you to lay on your back. He drags his boxers off and throws them to the floor. He practically rips the t-shirt you were wearing off.

“What do you mean fuck it?” You giggle.

“I’m gonna pump you silly and get you pregnant. I’m fuckin’ done using condoms.”

“Harry…” You cup his cheeks. “An hour ago it didn’t really seem like you wanted-“

He crashes his mouth over yours, and practically rams his tongue in your mouth to shut you up. He had his reservations, but he had such a tough time telling you no or even denying you of something you really wanted. The thought of you being so willing to put your body through this again because you wanted to carry another one of his children drove him absolutely wild. You said you had all this love to give, and so did he. He wanted to turn into another little bundle with you.

He bites your bottom lip before sitting up to give you some air. You look up at him stunned. He had a dark, lustful look in his eyes. One of his hands travels up to grip your throat.

“Got me all riled up now, gonna let me take care of it?” He asks.

“Yes.”

He grins at you and loosens his grip on your neck.

“Will you go down on me?”

“No.”

“What?!”

“Do you wanna know why we had so much trouble with the first two? I kept eating you out like every time we tried, and apparently saliva can, like, kill sperm. So, unfortunately, I can’t put my tongue on you.” He starts kissing on your neck and down your chest. “Well, can’t put my tongue on your there, at least.” He swirls his tongue around one of your nipples.

“Harry don’t suck or bite, I’m still making milk…”

He rolls his eyes as he kisses between the valley of your breasts. He kisses on the area just above your nipple and bites down hard, causing you to gasp. His hand goes back between your legs to spread you apart. He lines himself up and rubs his tip around your folds and throbbing clit before pushing inside. You let out a relieved sigh. He grabs both of your legs and throws them over his shoulders. His fingers dig into your calves as he starts thrusting in and out of you. Your head rolls back into the pillows as one of your hands travels down to lightly rub your clit.

“Christ.” He grunts. “How are you still so beautiful?” Your eyes meet his and all you do is smile at him. “I mean really, it’s just not fair.”

He drops your legs and comes to you so you’re chest to chest. His mouth is on yours again and you wrap your legs around his waist. Your hands travel to his hair as he takes over rubbing your clit.

“Can’t wait to feel your come, Harry.” You groan.

He drops his head to the crook of your neck. He nearly lost it at your words, but he needed to make sure you got yours first, not that it was a race or anything. He wanted you to feel good all over, and for a little while longer. He rocks into you in a way that hits your g-spot, making you arch up into him.

“Like that, baby girl?”

“Fuck, yes, don’t stop.”

He feels you tighten around him and he knows you’re close. He rubs your clit faster, and that’s when you lose it. A cracked gasp leaves your lips. You twitch and writhe under him as he tries to hold you down. You kiss him as his pace picks back up. You can’t remember the last time you two weren’t interrupted or had to be quick, this was amazing.

“Harry.” You whimper. You weren’t making this easy for him at all. He couldn’t hang on much longer. You were too much when you were so needy like this. “Want you to come.”

“Want me to come, angel?” He whispers in your ear and it sends a shiver up your spine.

You smirk to yourself and grab his face so he’ll look at you.

“Come on, Daddy, put another baby in me.”

“Jesus, fucckkk.”

His come shoots inside you and paints all your walls. You moan out from being able to feel it after so long. He nearly collapses on top of you. He was exhausted. He slowly slips out of you and you clamp your legs together. He rolls onto his back and he looks at you.

“That was evil.” He breathes. You look at him and chuckle. “S’not funny.”

“Yes it is. I call you Daddy all the time.”

“Yeah, in front of the kids. Little bit different in the bedroom.”

“Got you to come didn’t it?” You boop his nose.

“Didn’t need that much help, love, I was about ready to explode either way.” He reaches out to stroke your cheek. “So beautiful.” He gets up from the bed to go clean himself up, and after waiting a few minutes you do the same.

“So…you’re really into having another baby? It’s not just me wanting one?” You ask as you both face each other and cuddle up to one another.

“I want it. I was just being silly earlier.”

“No, your feelings were completely valid, honey. Sometimes I need a reality check.”

“I think…three will be enough though. I think anything more would be a lot for us, but a family of five sounds nice.”

“Technically six, can’t forget about Buster.” You chuckle.

“Right, can’t forget about our oldest.” He smiles. “Do you agree though? Three’s enough?”

“Yeah, three’s plenty.”

“As long as we’re on the same page about that, I’m good with doing it all over again.” He kisses your forehead.

“And then you can get a vasectomy.”

“Y/N.” He groans. “I don’t wanna shoot blanks.”

“But then we’d literally never have to worry.”

“Sometimes they don’t take.”

“So you’d rather me go through some kind of invasive procedure when you could just easily get a little snip?”

“Why are we talking about this now?”

“Because it’s something we’ll need to be on the same page about, Harry. I don’t wanna get an IUD or get my tubes tied. I shouldn’t have to when there’s an even easier, low risk procedure out there.” You rub your thumb over his cheek. “Just think it over, okay?”

“Okay.” He kisses your nose. “Let’s get you pregnant first, though.”

“Agreed.” You yawn and wrap yourself tighter around him. He pulls you in nice and close. Times like this it felt like before you were even ever married with kids when you’d just hold each other like this. “I love you.” You whisper.

“I love you too.” He whispers back.

Saturdays were for raking leaves. Jack loved being able to help Harry outside a little more now that he was a tad older. You were inside with Jessica making grilled cheese and tomato soup for everyone. She enjoyed watching you cook. Once in a while she’d whine because of her teeth.

“Need a new ring, darling girl?”

You go into the freezer for a teething ring and hand it to her. She happily puts it into her mouth to suck on. You smile at her and kiss the top of her head. You were happy she didn’t fuss when she was in her highchair. You go over to the sliding door and you love what you see. Harry tackling Jack down into one of the larger pile of leaves and them both hysterically laughing. If your ovaries weren’t ready to explode already, there sure as hell would be now. You slide the door open and step out.

“I hate to ruin the fun boys, but lunch is ready!”

“Grilled cheese!” Jack shoots up and runs towards you.

“Wash your hands please.”

He groans, but does as you say. Harry comes strolling up to you.

“You as well, Daddy.” You grin.

“Sure thing, Mummy.” He pinches your bottom and goes down the hall to wash his hands with Jack.

You cut up Jack’s sandwich for him in to long quarters. He looks at it funny.

“Why’s it like this, Mumma?”

“So you can dunk it into the soup if you want.” You blow on his cup of soup for him. “Should be cool enough.”

“Hey, do that to mine.” Harry smirks.

“Blow it yourself.” You shake your head at him. “It tastes good, Jack, see?” You dunk your own piece of sandwich into the soup. “Mm, so yummy.”

Jack watches Harry do the same, and that was enough for him. He dunks his sandwich into the soup and takes a chomp out of it. His eyes grow wide and he smiles which makes you and Harry laugh.

“Mm, that’s good, Mumma.”

“Knew you’d like it.” You smile and look at Harry. “Got much left to do out there?”

“Just need to bag it all up and drag the bags out front.”

“Do you need my help for that?”

“Nah, I should be able to manage.” He shrugs. “But thanks.”

“Mumma, Daddy said we have enough twigs for a fire later.”

“Oh, did he?” You tap your chin. “Hmm, I guess that means I’ll have to go to the store and get some marshmallows.”

“Yes!”

“You can take him while I finish the yard if you want.”

“Sure, that’ll work out well. Jessica can nap while I drive around.”

“They both can.”

“No naps.” Jack pouts.

“If you don’t nap then we can’t have a fire.” Harry says firmly. Usually you didn’t like when he would get so stern with Jack, but right now it was working for you.

“Daddy’s right, Jack. We can’t have a fire if you don’t nap.”

“Fine.” He huffs and finishes up his lunch.

Harry helps you get the two of them in the car and kisses you goodbye before getting back to work in the yard. You had Jessica strapped to your chest and Jack in the little seat in the shopping cart. You kept wondering how you might do this with three kids, but by the time a third would be born, Jack and Jessica could both sit in the shopping cart.

“Can we have s’mores, Mumma?”

“Sure, we could do that, honey.” You smile.

You walk around the store and grab all the items. Jessica was absolutely passed out, and Jack’s eyes were getting droopy. You needed to get them both back in the car stat. You just needed to grab the graham crackers.

“Shit.” You say to yourself. You couldn’t really reach the brand that Harry liked. You probably could’ve just lifted Jack up to grab them, but a man standing near you saw your dilemma.

“Need some help?”

“That would be great, thanks.” You smile as he grabs the box and hands it to you.

“Cute kids.” He smiles.

“Oh, thanks. They’re fading fast.”

“I didn’t even know they made gluten free graham crackers.”

“Yeah, my husband prefers them. They actually taste pretty good.”

The man nods as you start to walk away. You get in line and notice that he gets in line behind you. You smile at him again and he returns it. You feel his eyes burn into you as you put everything up on the belt. You were starting to feel uneasy, but you weren’t sure why. You pay for your things, and hang back a moment. You pretend to check the receipt as the man walks by you and out of the store. You notice that he doesn’t walk out to a car. He was just standing near the door. You take a deep breath. It could easily be nothing, maybe he was waiting for a ride, but you were starting to freak yourself out.

“Mumma?” Jack says sleepily.

“I just need to…” You look around. “I need to call Daddy.” You take your phone out and call Harry.

“Love? Everything alright?”

“No…this guy at the store is giving me the creeps, and I’m afraid to walk out to the car.”

“Gimme ten minutes, I’ll take an uber so I can just drive you home.”

“I’m sorry, I just-“

“It’s okay. Ten minutes, honey.”

You couldn’t believe that the man was still there, standing outside. He was definitely waiting for you. You see Harry’s uber pull up and you feel a wave of relief. Harry looked very rugged today. His scruff was due for a shave, he had his bandanna on to keep his hair back, his work boots, loose jeans, and a sweater.

“Hey.” He smiles when he comes in. “Is it the guy that’s right out there?”

“Yeah.”

“Alright, gimme the keys.”

“Hi, Daddy.” Jack yawns.

“Hi, buddy.”

Harry takes your keys and grabs the couple of bags out of the cart, and also lifts Jacks out. He keeps him on his hip while he walks out with you. You don’t look at the man as you walk by, and out to the car. You get the kids in their car seats, and Harry drives you home. You were shaking slightly.

“He had to have been waiting for me.” You whisper. “I can’t even go to the grocery store now?”

“You have your pepper spray in your bag, right?”

“Yes.”

“And I showed you how to stab someone with the keys if need be.”

“It’s different when the kids are with me. If I was alone…I don’t know I probably would’ve been fine, but if something happened to me…”

“Don’t think like that.” He puts his hand on your thigh and gives it a squeeze. “What happened, did he interact with you?”

“He helped me grab the graham crackers off that top shelf. You know I can never reach those. I even mentioned I had a husband. Then he ended up in line behind me. I stayed back to see if he was planning to follow me, and he just stood there.” You shake your head and put your hand over his. “Don’t know what I would do without you.”

You and Harry got Jack and Jessica inside for a proper afternoon nap, and the two of you cuddled on the couch for a bit yourselves. You had calmed down from the little scare. You thought to maybe call the store tomorrow to have them check their tapes to see if that man had come in and done anything weird like that before.

“Should we invite Sarah and Niall for the fire tonight?” Harry asks, stretching out to sit up.

“Sure! I’ll text them now.” You take your phone out and text in the group chat you have to let them know they’re welcome to come by. “Probably gonna be one of the last ones. It’s starting to get too cold at night.”

“Can’t wait for Thanksgiving break. Love when we get to be home together for a few days.”

“I know, only a few weeks away now.”

“I’ve lined up a couple of interviews with those students you sent my way. I’m gonna see ‘em Monday. Hopefully they’ll refrain from fucking in the storage closet.” He rolls his eyes.

“How was your chat with the dean?”

“Fine.” He shrugs. “I tried to come see you, but I think you were teaching, and I didn’t wanna disturb you.”

“Since when do you not wanna disturb one of my lectures?” You laugh.

“Well, it’s one thing if it’s at the end of class. Those kids are paying for a proper education, you know?” He smirks.

“How considerate of you.” You crawl into his lap and straddle him. “You know…those two should be asleep for a little while longer.” You lean down to his ear as he wraps his arms around you. “When was the last time we fucked on this couch?” Your words send a shiver up his spine.

“What if he comes trotting down the stairs?”

“Buster will distract him. You know how he loves to pet and play with Buster when he first wakes up.”

“True.” His hand slide into the back of your jeans so he can grip your ass. You roll your hips down on his. “Just gotta be quiet though.”

You nod your head in understanding. You stand up briefly to take your pants and underwear off. Harry undoes his belt and zipper to take his dick out. You grab the blanket and wrap it around your back so you weren’t totally exposed, just in case. You get back on his lap. He rubs your slit to make sure you’re wet as you pump his dick.

Once you’re both ready you slide down on him. You both grunt and moan. He wraps his arms around you and pulls you close as you tuck your face into the crook of his neck. He moves you up and down on him and you whimper into him. You bite down on his soft skin and it makes him thrust up into you harder. You grip at his shoulders and make fists with the material of his sweater.

“Oh, god.” You moan and move your face too look at him. You slot your mouth over his as he continues with his movements. You rock against him to give your clit some much needed friction. “Harry.” You gasp. “Shit, oh my god.” He had you panting already, and with another sharp thrust up he had you coming around him. Your lips find his again to help capture the noises you were making.

It didn’t take him long to come after that. He lays you down puts a pillow under your knees to prop your legs up a bit. He covers your lower half with the blanket.

“Gonna have to wash that.” He chuckles and kisses your forehead. He sees your phone light up and looks at it. “Sarah and Niall are in for the fire.”

“Oh, great! This’ll be fun.”

“Daddy!” You both hear Jack call from his room.

“He must need to shit.” Harry chuckles and you swat at him. “What? You don’t think it’s funny that he only wants my help with that?”

“He gets embarrassed when I help him, and I feel terrible about it.”

“He’s just too polite to shit in front of his mum, it’s cute.”

Harry goes up the stairs to Jack’s room. He was doing a dance like he really need to use the bathroom. He had been using the actual toilet more and more, but he had a tough time going number two alone. You eventually get up and get yourself situated. You go up to check on Jessica who was making babbling noises in her crib.

“Oh, someone’s awake.” You coo. She smiles up at you. “Hi, angel. Mummy change you now.”

You lift her out of the crib and set her on the changing table. You get her all fresh and cozy in a change of clothes and carry her out of the room. You take her to the living room and sit on the floor with her. You watch as she slowly gets herself to her feet.

“Good job, Jessica! Now, walk to Mumma.” You hold your arms out for her to balance on. Harry comes down with Jack and Buster. “Come on, you can do it.” She takes little steps. She wobbles a bit, but she makes it and you scoop her up in a hug and tons of kisses.

“Hey.” Jack pouts and runs over to you.

“Oof!” He nearly knocks you down.

“Jack, that’s too rough.” Harry says and gets on the floor with everyone. He takes Jessica from you and snuggles her close. “Hi, darling girl, did you have a nice nappy?” He boops her nose and she giggles.

“Jack, why do you get so jealous?” You laugh.

“I walk all the time, and you don’t give me kisses.” He pouts.

“Oh…well, I did when you were her age. I’m sorry.” You hold him close to you and give him tons of kisses. “All better?”

“Much.” He smiles.

“Everyone have enough blankets?” You ask the group as everyone’s sat around the fire.

“Think we’re good, Y/N.” Niall says and pulls Jack into his lap. “Now, let’s get this marshmallow roasted.”

You had the baby monitor on your hip so you’d be able to hear if Jessica needed anything while you were all outside. You snuggle up with Harry and he hands you a s’more.

“Thank you.” You kiss him on the cheek.

“Uncle Niall?” Jack asks.

“Yes?”

“How come you and Auntie Sarah don’t have a baby?”

“Jack.” You say. “Not an okay question to ask.”

“Why?”

“It’s personal.” Harry says. “Not all adults have babies.”

“It’s okay.” Sarah says and takes Jack into her lap. “Jack, I work with lots of little kids all day long. I have so many kids that I love and that I care about. So, Uncle Niall and I didn’t really feel the need to have one of our own. Besides, we like just being an Auntie and an Uncle. We get to give all our love to you and Jessica.”

“I thought all married people had babies.”

“Not the case, bud.” Niall says.

“How come Mumma and Daddy had us, then?”

“Because your Daddy likes getting your mum pr-“

“Niall!” Sarah swats an arm at him and he starts laughing.

“Jack, come here.” You chuckle and he walks around over to you with a gooey marshmallow in his mouth. “What’s with all the questions, hm? People like to express their love for each other in different ways. Daddy and I wanted to turn our love into babies, and Sarah and Niall wanted to turn their love into, uh…” You look at them for help.

“Vacations.” Niall says. “We get to travel and see the world, and show everyone around us how much we love each other.” He grabs her hand and kisses it.

“And, we give back to others in need, Jack. Niall and I use the money that we’d spend on babies to donate to different causes. That’s another way we show our love.”

“See, honey, there’s lots of different ways to show love out there.” Harry says. “But I do like getting your mum pregnant.” He grins.

“Okay!” You stand up with Jack. “I’m taking him to bed because you two are idiots.” You shake your head and carry him inside. The three of them laugh.

“Sorry ‘bout that, hope he didn’t make you uncomfortable. It’s sorta rude to ask someone why they don’t have kids.”

“It’s okay.” Sarah shrugs. “Unfortunately we’re used to it. I can’t tell you how many of the parents, even some of the other teachers at school have told me that I’d change my mind.” She scoffs. “I don’t have those motherly instincts. I can babysit no problem, but doing it 24/7? No thanks. I’ll leave it to you guys.”

“I truthfully don’t mind just being an uncle either. I like that we can pick and go as we please, and just do things spontaneously without having to worry. I feel completely fulfilled.” Niall says.

“Me too.” She kisses his hand. You come back out shortly and pinch Harry’s arm as you sit down.

“Ow! What the fuck?” He rubs his arm before throwing it around you.

“He kept asking me why Daddy likes getting me pregnant, you fucking moron.” You take a sip of your drink. “I’m lucky he was tired. Thank god Buster likes cuddling with him or he’d never sleep.”

“Sorry.” He chuckles. “Guess I shouldn’t have been goofing like that.”

“Y/N, has Harry told you about our little plan for spring?” Niall says.

“No, what’s that?”

“We were thinking of becoming soccer coaches, getting Jack started on a team and all that.” Harry explains. “Lots of kids in this neighborhood, could be fun to start a league for the really little kids.”

“Yeah, get some skills early on.”

“But Harry…you’re not very good at soccer.”

“True, but Niall is. Gotta have a kid on the team to be a coach, so he could be my assistant coach, but do all of the actual coaching, while I would bring the snacks and make up the rosters.”

“Does Jack want to play soccer?” Sarah asks. “He really likes to draw.”

“Yeah, he’s told me a couple times, especially when we play in the backyard. He likes kicking the ball around.”

“Then I think it’s a great idea. You could pick him up from daycare and take him to whatever field the practices would be at. It would be fun to see him play on the weekends too. He’d look so cute in his little uniform.” You pout.

“It’s settled then, we’re puttin’ a soccer team together.” Niall smiles and looks at Sarah. “And you can be the cheerleader.”

“Oh, please.” She scoffs. “Y/N and I will be off to the side sipping wine in inconspicuous bottles.”

“I like the sound of that.” You giggle.

You were in the middle of one of your lectures when there was a knock on the door. You go to open and it see it’s one of the workers from the daycare.

“Hi, Dr. Y/L/N, sorry to disrupt your class, but you may want to come get Jack. He’s not feeling well.”

“Oh no! Has he thrown?”

“No, but he says his stomach definitely hurts, and we took his temp. He has a little fever.”

“Alright, um…shit, I have two more classes today. Let me call my husband and see if he can grab him quick.”

“We’ll need him to take Jessica too, she could also easily be sick.”

“Okay.” You go back into the classroom and grab your phone. “Kids are sick, talk amongst yourselves for a moment.” You tell them and step back out to call Harry. “Hi.”

“What’s up?”

“Jack’s not feeling well, can you pick them up from daycare? I’d just take them home, but I have two more classes today.”

“Uhh…oi! Isaac!” You take the phone from your ear at how loud he yelled. “Yeah, I can step out for a bit to get them.”

“Thank you, you’re a lifesaver.” You hang up. “Harry will be there soon to grab them.”

“Awesome, thanks! Sorry again for disrupting.”

“No, I’m glad you came to tell me. Thank you.”

You go back into class and get on with your lecture.

Harry gets to the daycare. He frowns when he sees how pale Jack is. He scoops up Jessica and gets them both into his car.

“Don’t feel good, Daddy.”

“I know, buddy. We’re almost home.”

Luckily Jack didn’t puke in the car, but Harry was nervous he might so he sets him up on the couch with him so he could properly watch him. He puts Jessica in her bouncy. She didn’t have a fever, but he knew that could easily change. Harry gets his laptop once Jack is settled and comfortable, and answers some emails. He felt terrible for leaving, but it was nearly the end of the day anyways.

You get home around four, a little later than usual, but you had a ton of students come during your office hours. You run right upstairs to the living room. Harry was stretched out on the couch. Jack and Jessica both laying on his chest. Both curled up and comfortable on their Daddy.

“Hi.” You whisper.

“Hi.” He smiles. “He puked a couple of times. Think he has a little bug.”

“Oh no.” You frown and sit on the edge of the couch to stroke Jack’s back.

“Gave him some children’s Tylenol. She’s been fine, but she could easily get sick too.”

“I’m gonna go change his sheets. How’s Buster?”

“Been an angel f’me all afternoon. Love being able to just let him outside when I can’t really walk him.”

“Okay, let me take care of his bed and then I’ll get us all fed.” You kiss Harry’s forehead. You start to walk towards the stairs, and then you turn around and look at him.

“What?”

“Nothing.” You smile.

“I know that look, and you’re nuts if you think there’s gonna be any baby making tonight.”

“The thought never occurred to me.” You scoff. “You just look so cute with them.” You pout. “It’s hard not to want a dozen little babies.”

“Go change his fuckin’ sheets, will you?” He chuckles.

You get Jack’s bed settled, and come back down to feed Buster. You decide that vegetable soup would be a good idea, so you get to chopping and throw everything into a pot with some broth and let it cook. You come back over to Harry and smell Jessica’s bum.

“Oof, she stinks.” You laugh and take her from him.

“I was afraid of waking him up.” Harry sits up slightly and keeps Jack curled up in his arms. “Poor kid. Cried after he puked. I think it made his stomach feel worse.”

You take Jessica upstairs to change her and put her pj’s on, and then bring her back down to get her to walk a little. She balances on your forearms as she takes her little steps.

“She’ll be doing it on her own in no time.” Harry says.

“Eight months, she’s growing so fast.” You sigh. “I love the little curls that are coming in on her head. Gonna have another mop like with him.”

“Must have strong genes.” Harry chuckles. Jack groans, but Harry rubs his back to soothe him.

“I’ll be able to stay home with them tomorrow since I don’t teach. I can just work from home.”

“Are you sure? I could probably stay home.”

“Don’t be silly. I’ll take care of them.”

“Mumma?” Jack adjusts in Harry’s arms and opens his eyes slowly.

“Hi, honey. Having a nice snuggle with Daddy?”

“Mhm. Don’t feel good.”

“I know.” You pick Jessica up and carry her to the highchair. Harry carries Jack into the kitchen. “Wanna try eating some soup?”

“No.” He pouts.

“How about some toast?”

“No.” Tears nearly form in his eyes.

“I think he’s afraid of spewing again.”

“He needs to eat something. You know what they say, starve a cold, feed a fever.”

“Toast is probably better, but I’ll have soup.” Harry says.

You nod and fill up two bowls. You give Jessica a bubby for dinner while Harry gets Jack to have some toast. After you clean up, you bring them both upstairs for bed. Buster snuggles up with Jack.

“Baby, we’re leaving this bucket here, if you don’t feel good you can just use that, okay?”

“Wanna sleep with you.” He whines.

“Daddy and I aren’t going to sleep yet. I put nice new sheets on your bed a little while ago, isn’t it cozy?”

“Got her down.” Harry says, coming in. “Buster will make you feel better, buddy. You like sleepin’ with him.”

“Wanna sleep with you.” He pouts.

“Jack, just try to sleep in here, and if you really can’t then you can come in with us, okay?” Harry says. You both kiss him goodnight and leave his room.

“I need a shower, gotta make sure we both don’t get sick too.”

“Oh, good idea. I’ll bring the baby monitor into the bathroom.” You say.

“You’re joining?”

“Why would we shower separately?” You scoff and go down the hall to your bedroom.

You hadn’t wanted Harry this much in a long time, or that’s at least how he felt. It sort of annoyed him that you had basically been fucking a lot just because you wanted a baby. He walks into the bedroom and starts taking his clothes off.

“Actually, I’d like to just have time to myself if that’s alright. They were on me all afternoon.”

“Oh…okay.”

He turns to go into the bathroom, only wearing his boxers. He sighs and turns around to look at you.

“Are we only fucking so much because you just want to get pregnant?”

“What?”

“It would just be nice to feel wanted because you want me, and not because you know I can give you another baby.”

“Oh my goodness, Harry.” You stand up and wrap your arms around him. “Have I been making you feel that way?”

“Yes.” He mumbles.

“I’m so sorry. I’m not sure what it’s been lately, I feel like my sex drive has just really come back in full swing. I mean, I want this baby, but I also just…want you. We’ve been getting interrupted less. I feel like we both have been able to figure out the good times of day to be intimate. I do just want you because I want you. I’m sorry if you’ve been feeling…used.”

“So…you really just wanted to take a shower with me?”

“I thought it would be some nice alone time, but if you want some time to yourself, that’s fine too.”

“No, let’s go in together. I want to now.” You smile and kiss each other before going into the bathroom.

You take your clothes off as Harry gets the water going. You both step in and sigh once the warm water hits your skin. You take turns washing each other, and then he pulls you close to him to kiss you. He backs you up to the wall and pushes you against it. His tongue felt so good against yours and you loved the way his hands were gripping your cheeks. He reaches between your legs to finger you.

“Jesus.” He groans. “So fucking we-“ He looks down as he pulls his fingers out. “Um…love?” He holds his fingers up and you frown when you see the all too familiar reddish color.

“Sorry.” You slip away from him to finish rinsing off.

“Babe, we can still…”

You turn to look at him with tears in your eyes. He pulls you in close and lets you cry into him. This was always the worst part of trying. He kisses your cheek and you look up at him.

“Sorry, um, I can just suck you off or-“

“If you’re not in the mood now, it’s okay.”

“No, we just talked about this not being about making a baby, so-“

“You’re getting upset. You got period, and that sucks, but maybe next month you won’t. We only just started trying again, Y/N. It’s gonna take some time.”

“Right.” You nod. “We should get out in case Jack needs something.”

Harry nods and turns the water off. You get yourself situated and dressed and crawl into bed with Harry. As if on cue, Jack comes walking in with his thumb in his mouth, and his blanky in his other arm. Buster follows as well and plops on the floor.

“C’mere, darling.” You say to Jack. He crawls up on the bed and gets between you and Harry. You put your arm around him and hold him close to you. “Poor thing, Mumma’s gonna stay home with you tomorrow and we can snuggle all day if you want.”

“Really?”

“Mhm, anything you want.” You kiss the top of his head as he closes his eyes. Harry was on his side looking up at you. “What?”

“I get it now.”

“What do you mean?”

“Why you always get so…in the mood when you see me with them. You’re such a good mum, makes me wanna make more too.” He smiles.

“And you’re the best dad.” He leans up to kiss you goodnight, and then he turns the light off.

It took Jack a few days to feel better, but once he did he was back to his old self. Jessica caught a small fever herself, but she was fine. You were just happy that neither you nor Harry got sick. The second your period ended, it was on.

Jack and Jessica would be having a cousins sleepover at Erica’s after Thanksgiving dinner, and you may or may not have been excited to have the house all to yourselves for the night.

“Do you think Michael will have fun with so many little ones?” Harry asks on the drive home.

“Oh, sure. He likes being the big cousin. I still can’t believe Erica even offered it up.”

“Her and Mike can handle it. I think she was excited to snuggle up with Jessica.”

“I feel terrible she couldn’t have more…she always says I keep having them for her.” You laugh. “My Nannie used to say the same thing to my mom.”

“Speaking of Nannie…I was thinking for your spring break we could take a little family trip and go see her.”

“Are you serious?!”

“Yeah. She’s only seen Jessica once, it would be nice for her to spend some time with them. Plus, she always comes here. Florida’s beautiful in March.”

“You don’t need to convince me. We can start looking at flights soon. The kids are gonna be so well traveled when they get older. Once they get a lot older when we take them to the U.K. we could start taking them to some other countries.”

“That would be fun. It’s so easy to just take day trips and what not. They’ll be nice and well-rounded.”

“But I don’t want them to be spoiled. Gotta keep them humble.”

“Gem’ll keep them knocked down a peg, she’s really good at that.” He chuckles.

You both get into the house and kick your shoes off. Harry scoops you up and carries you up to the bedroom. Once he sets you down, you’re being pressed up against the wall harshly.

“You’re not too full or tired?” You ask between kisses.

“Nope, are you?”

“Nope.” You grin.

His lips find yours as you wrap your arms around his neck. You tug at the curls on the nape of his neck. This was very exciting. You could be as loud as you wanted, hell, you could leave the door open if you really felt like it. His hands were all over you, groping you wherever he felt like it. He fiddles with the zipper on the back of your dress, but finally gets it unzipped.

“Want you.” He mumbles into your neck as he sucks on your skin. You giggle on him.

“Really? I had no idea.”

“Don’t be cute.”

Your dress falls to the floor. You help him get his clothes off too. You’re just in your underwear as he hoists you up, bringing you over to the bed. He didn’t want his lips to leave you at all. He nipped where he felt like it, leaving behind little marks. He gets your bra and underwear off, and soon his fingers are rubbing around your folds.

“You obviously want me too.” He smirks, holding up his now slick and sticky fingers. He sucks them into his mouth before pressing them inside you.

You groan as you feel him curl them up. His thumb rubs circles into your clit as he pumps in and out of you. He sucks one of your nipples into his mouth but you tug his head up.

“I’m still making milk!”

“So?! S’not like I’m fucking sucking on it to grab a quick drink. You pumped before we left, you should be good.”

“It’s just weird…some could come out.”

“You really think I of all people give a fuck?” It was true, Harry didn’t care about anything of the things you thought would be gross for a guy, like hair and periods.

“Fine, but if you taste anything you have to come off.”

“Deal.”

He goes back to sucking on you, more so just swirling his tongue around your pebbled nipple. He kneads the other one with his free hand has he continues to finger you. You tug at the blankets as your body begins to feel hot all over.

“Oh my god.” You moan. “Harry.”

“Gonna come?”

“Yes, fuck, oh shit!”

He works you through it until you can’t take it anymore. It felt so good to just let your little cry out instead of having to bite it back. He retracts his fingers and sucks on them again.

“Look at you.” He strokes your face. “So flushed.” He smiles. “Was that a good one?”

“Very good.” You giggle.

“So beautiful, my sweet angel.” He leans in to kiss you. “My amazing wife.” He kisses you again. “Love you so much.”

“I love you too.”

He adjusts himself so his tip his playing with your clit. You grit your teeth as he pushes inside you. Your nails scratch down his back, causing goosebumps to raise on his skin. He rocks in and out of you as his tongue finds yours. He just couldn’t get enough of your mouth tonight.

“Have you been, ngh, using a new lip balm or something?” He asks as he runs his thumb over your bottom lip. “So soft.” He leans in and bites down on your bottom lip, sucking it into his mouth before letting it go.

“I exfoliated them with, shit, this, ugh Harry, I’ll tell you later.”

He chuckles as his thrusts quicken. You wrap your legs around him to pull him closer. His hands find yours and he pins them to the sides of your head, fingers intertwined.

“You feel so fucking good, babe.” He grunts.

Your heart’s racing as his tip starts to brush against your g-spot. Your head rolls back into the pillows, and he kisses on the now exposed part of your neck.

“Harry.” You moan.

“Say it louder.” He says into your ear.

“Harry!”

“Again.”

“Harry! Oh fuck!”

You come undone just as he’s coming inside you. You felt like you were swimming. You raise your hips to meet his over and over to really ride it out. He pulls out of you slowly and rests beside you. He pulls you close and kisses your hairline. It was quick, but so good. You imagine it wouldn’t be the only time you’d be making love tonight, and you were right. He was inside you again before you knew it.

Jack was finally old enough to understand Hanukkah a little more, and it was the cutest thing in the world. You had a menorah on the kitchen table, and a very small tree in the living room. Your home was decorated with snow men, and other winter scene things.

“Look at this little kippah Nannie sent him. His name is on the inside, so cute.” You show Harry as you get some gifts together.

“He’ll love it.”

“He’ll probably ask why Daddy doesn’t wear one.” You giggle.

“I’ve worn one at more of the formal events.” He defends himself.

“Very true.”

“Mumma! Is it time to light the candles?!”

“Look outside and tell me if it’s sundown.” You chuckle and shake your head as he pouts at you. “Got about an hour, baby doll.”

“Will we get to do it at Grammy’s?”

“Of course we will.” Harry says as he picks his son up. “Grammy has lots of menorahs for us. Are you excited to go on the plane in a couple of days?”

“Yes.” He smiles. “I told Jessica it’s not scary.”

“Well, that was very nice of you.” You kiss Jack’s cheek as you go to pick your daughter up. She’d been crawling on the floor. “Come on, darling, you can stand up.”

“I wonder if she’ll babble a bunch on the plane. I always feel bad for the people around us.”

“Oh well.” You shrug. “Babies make noise.”

An hour or so later, everyone gathers around the menorah. Harry holds up Jack so he can watch you like the two candles and he mumbles along the prayer as you chant it. You were happy he thought it was so much fun.

“Can we have latkes?” He nearly whines.

“We’re going to make them at Grammy’s.” You tell him. “We can stink up her house.” You laugh.

You were incredibly nauseous on the plane. It was rare for you to not feel well with how often you travel this way. You tried to just keep your eyes closed, and focus on your music, but it was difficult with Jessica in your arms, and Jack complaining that he wanted to cuddle with you too.

“Let Mummy rest, Jack, you can sleep with me.” Harry says, lifting the armrest between them. “Come here.” He puts his arm around Jack and holds him close.

“Why does Jessica always get Mumma?” He pouts.

“She doesn’t, Mummy and I take turns with her just like we do with you. Mummy might have to feed her quick, so it’s easier for her to hold her right now. What’s wrong? Don’t wanna snuggle with Daddy?” Harry pouts at Jack and it makes him giggle.

“You’re silly, Daddy.”

“Course I am, Daddy’s are supposed to be silly.”

Harry catches you smiling with your eyes closed, and it makes him smile more. Jack settles into Harry, and then he slowly drifts off. You reach your free hand out for Harry’s, and you’re able to hold hands. Sometimes you missed when it was just the two of you so you could cuddle on these long flights, but you also loved what you had now.

Once you’ve landed, you had to rush to a bathroom. Harry was a bit frantic since Jessica would definitely need to be changed. He hated changing her in the men’s bathrooms because they often didn’t have changing tables. Normally you would take the kids in with you to get them in fresh clothes, but you were so nauseous. You get into a stall and throw up.

“Please, fuck, don’t tell me I have the flu.” You say to yourself as you wipe your mouth. You get up and go out to the sink to brush your teeth. You come back out and wait for Harry.

“Are you alright?” He asks as he hands Jessica over to you.

“Yeah, I just don’t feel one hundred percent.” You didn’t want to say you got sick so Jack wouldn’t be scared. “Jack, hold my hand, baby.”

Harry gets all the luggage, and you both make your way to your rental car, which was a minivan this time around. You get the car seats settled, and get the kids strapped in. Harry holds your hand as he drives to Anne’s.

“I’m sure mum has some pepto you can take. You were nauseous right?”

“Yeah, usually I’m fine, it’s so weird.” You shrug. “I can always go to the drug store if need be. I feel better now.”

Anne was delighted to see her grandbabies. Jack attacked her with hugs and kisses, and Jessica babbled on to her.

“She can sort of walk now, Mum, look.” Harry helps Jessica stand, and she toddles over to Anne’s legs.

“Oh my goodness, growing up so fast! Wait until Auntie Gem sees you! Come in, you must be tired.”

Anne had lunch ready to go for everyone like she usually did. You felt hungry now, but as soon as you sat down you felt nauseous again.

“I’m so sorry, I think I need to lay down for a bit.”

Harry stands up but you put your hand on his shoulder.

“Stay here with everyone, I’m fine.” You smile and go upstairs. You lay down on the soft bed and fall asleep immediately. Why were you so tired? Later, you’re woken up to the sound of Gemma’s voice.

“Y/N?” She whispers.

“Hm?” You sit up. “Oh, hi Auntie.”

“Hi, Mummy.” She smiles and sits on the edge of the bed. “Harry said you weren’t feeling well.”

“I think I’m coming down with something.” You frown. “I spewed at the airport.”

“Interesting.” She smirks, and tosses you a pregnancy test. “Need to pee?”

“Did he tell you to get this?” You chuckle.

“No, but when he texted saying you didn’t feel great I figured…”

“I suppose it would make sense.” You think for a moment and look at the period tracker on your phone. “I haven’t gotten my December period yet.” You furrow your brows.

“When was the last time you two…”

“Um.” You blush. “Well…I mean…”

“Right, right.” She blushes as well. “Think you two are the only married couple with kids that actually make time for that.”

“I do need to pee…I feel bad, usually he wants to be in on it, but how cute would it be if I am, and then I give this to him on Christmas?”

“It would be very cute! Go on, take a wee.”

You go into the bathroom and take the test. The two of you sit in the bedroom until the three minutes is up. You gasp as tears form in your eyes.

“Congratulations.” She says, hugging you.

“Can you hide this in your room? I have a really fun idea for how to give it to him.”

“Of course!” She wipes some tears away. “This is amazing.”

Christmas was wonderful, and it wrapped up Hanukkah perfectly. Jack got to have his latkes. You couldn’t wait to give Harry his surprise. That evening as you were settling in for dessert and pj’s, you grab Jack before he sits with his new toys.

“Honey, I have one more gift for Daddy, could you give it to him for me please?”

“Yes, Mumma.” He beams, excited he’s been given a task. You hand him the small box Gemma had picked up for you, and watch as he goes over to Harry, who was sitting with a cup of tea on the couch while Gemma held Jessica. Anne was sitting on the floor setting up one of Jack’s toys. “Excuse me, Daddy.”

“My polite little boy.” Harry coos. “Yes?”

“This is from Mumma.” Jack hands Harry the small box. Harry looks over at you and you gesture to open it. “Hmm…” He shakes the box and hears some rattling. “What else could Mum have gotten me?” Harry genuinely had no idea what else you could have bought for him, but he was excited nonetheless. Gemma props her phone up to record his reaction. He opens the box and his mouth falls open. He looks at you immediately, who was biting back a smile and tears. “Are you serious?” His voice cracks as he smiles.

“Mhm.”

“Oh my goodness.” He chuckles and stands up to walk over to you. You wrap your arms around each other. “When did you find out?”

“Took it the other day. I have no idea how far along I am, could only be four weeks. I’ll go to the doctor when we get back later in January.”

He cups your cheeks and kisses you.

“Wait…” Anne snatches the box and sees the pregnancy test. “You’re?!”

“Yes.” You giggle. She stands up and gives you a hug.

“What’s going on?” Jack asks.

“Well.” You rub your lower tummy. “I got something growing in here.”

“Another baby?!”

“You bet.”

Jack rushes over to you and gives you a big hug.

“You’re excited?!”

“Yeah! Jessica needs someone to play with too. She’ll be a big sister, and I’ll be a big brother again.”

“He’s smart.” Harry laughs. “You’re the best brig brother there is.” He kisses you again. “Wow, a third baby.”

“And then you’re done, right?” Anne asks. “I love grandkids, but you two wanna be smart about this.”

“Once I know this one’s gonna stick, he’s getting snipped.” You say.

“Oi, I still haven’t agreed to that.”

“Harry.” His mother says. “You’ll do it, and not put up a fuss about it.”

Later that night, as the four of you settle into bed, yes the four of just slept in the same bed while at Anne’s, Harry was beaming at you. You had put Jack and Jessica on one side of the bed for a bit so you and Harry could cuddle.

“Stop looking at me like that.” You whisper.

“Can’t help it, you’re just so beautiful.” He puts his hand on your lower stomach. “Got another one in you, can’t believe it. Do you think it was Thanksgiving?”

“Could have been.” You giggle. “Does this mean you’ll go back to eating me out? Really been missing that.”

“Honey, I promise once Dr. Johnson really tells you you’re pregnant, I’ll go down on you for hours.”

“That sounds nice.”

He leans down to kiss you.

“I’m the luckiest man in the world.”

#harry styles #harry styles imagine #my everything #harry styles fic #harry styles fanfic #harry styles series #harry styles x reader #harry styles x y/n #harry styles y/n #harry styles fluff #harry styles angst #harry styles smut #pls tag if you reblog!#this one is emotional for me #we're almost at the end and i feel so weird!

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heyheydidjaknow · 3 years

Text

I would’ve posted this earlier but, alas, I passed out early. This is a longer one, but tumblr got its act together so I can post it all in one part. You guys know where the other chapters are, and if you don’t, they’re at the end of the chapter. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go eat straight Nutella.

Chapter 10

“I’m thinking about getting some gloves.”

He looks over at you as he laces up his skates. “Yeah?”

“Yeah,” you nod, smiling slightly to yourself as you look your hands over, trying to imagine what they would look like. “Like, badass, fingerless gloves.”

He smiles. “Dude, those would look metal as fuck.”

“Totally, right?” Your smile widens. “With studs and shit.”

He gets to his feet, hopping onto the ice. “Hell yeah.” He drops a puck to assault as you go back to your backed-up coursework the best you can—your handwriting has gone to hell, but you are working with what you have.

You flinch at the crack of his stick, the cross of the T ending up underneath the letter somehow. A cheer from Casey tells you the rubber cylinder’s fate.

‘I swear I learned this.' You squint at the basic algebra, the pencil, crudely held in your fist, hovering over the packet. ‘Why can’t I do this?’

“How’s your pile coming along?” Another crack.

“It’s comin’.” You run your fingers through your hair. “Just… trynna remember how to do ne—… subtraction.” ‘Not debate. Negating is debate.’

He laughs. Another crack. “Man, that thing really fucked you over, huh?”

“Thoroughly.” You decide against continuing to torture yourself, having been at it for the past five hours—most of it in the library before Casey invited you to watch him practice some more— and set the large stack of homework back in your bag. “Are you actually making the shots?”

“Casey Jones doesn’t miss shots.” Another crack.

“Pardon me, oh almighty king of the ice.” You stand on your good leg, grabbing the side of the wall to watch as he went back to collect his pucks.

You two have managed to bond over a mutual respect/love of heavy metal and hockey and, seeing as you are staying out of the Hamatos’ hair for a while—not upon request, but out of courtesy—you have managed to spend a lot more time with him than you may have otherwise. Your school has not assigned Biology any big projects yet, so, until you are assigned it, you do not have anything other than your health to stress about.

“Pardon accepted.” You watch his form as he performs another slap shot.

“You…” you trail off, trying to remember what you were going to say.

“What?”

You shrug. “Dunno.” You lean your head on your arms. “I’ll remember eventually.”

He drops the second puck. “Got any plans after this?”

You sigh. “Nope. Probably gonna head home and try not to cut my fingers making dinner again.”

He takes another shot. “Then let’s go out after this. You and me.”

You smile. “What, don’t have any plans either?”

“Nah.” He drops the third. “Dad doesn’t care if I’m home late anyway.”

“True, true.” You have decided against prying into his home life; it is not your place and does not concern you in the slightest. “Where do you wanna go?”

“Wanna catch a movie? Heard there was this new pizza place just a couple blocks down if you wanna try to sneak it in.”

You snicker. “In the box and all?”

“Yes.” He grins mischievously and hits this one off the walls. Some way, somehow, it still makes it into the goal. “I bet your sweatshirt is big enough to stick the box under.”

You stick your tongue out at him. “Not in the mood for burns on top of scars, Jones,” you reprimand him teasingly. “That just ain't it.”

“Then you can wear mine under that one and—”

“Your sweat-soaked hoodie you’ve been practicing in all day?” You cringe at the thought. “Over my dead body.”

“I mean…” he licks his teeth, smile widening, “it’s not exactly like you’re in the best—”

You laugh. “So not cool!”

He puts his hands up in defense, gliding over. “I mean, am I wrong, though?”

“That is completely besides the point, you ass.” You balance on your foot, crossing your arms. “Damn. Making fun of the girl with the broken leg.”

He leans against the wall. “Man, you were dying before the crash.”

You roll your eyes. “Alright, whatever, Jones.” You lean against your hand. “How’s Johanna,” you sing.

He presses his hand against your face, pushing you away. “Annie is doing fine.”

You grin, steadying yourself on the wall. “Do you feel her, Johanna?”

“I’m gonna tell her you call her that if you don’t quit it.”

“Do you think that walls can hide her? Even when you’re at her window?”

He pushed his arm all the way out. You hop back.

“Her name isn’t even Johanna.”

“But she is Johanna,” you whine in protest, not bothering to hide your mirth. “She has the hair, the voice, the disposition. She’s an ingénue and you know it.” You have been teasing him about this for a while now: the girl in question—Annabelle Halshaw, a year below you two—had caught his eye when he had heard through the grapevine that she was the lead singer in some indie band. When he had shown you a picture and told you the story, you insisted on calling her Johanna for her golden hair and soft, sweet singing voice he had proudly had you listen to.

“She’s not.”

You roll your eyes, sitting back down as you grab your bag. “Lie to yourself all you want,” you goad, “but deep down, you know in your heart that the truth,” you put a finger up, “is apparent.”

He hops off the ice, sitting next to you as he unlaces his skates. “Whatever.” He smirks. “How’s The Don?”

You avert your gaze. “I haven’t seen ‘im.”

“Boo.” He tied the laces together. “Some girlfriend you are,” he ribs.

You go red. “Not my boyfriend. Not even friends with benefits.”

“Yeah, sure.” He sets the skates into his bag. “That’s why you already know his family.”

“That—”

“And why you’ve had him over to your place.”

“If you don’t cool your tits, I’m telling Lucy you’re crushing on her friend.”

“Don’t you dare!”

“What,” you simper, “think I won’t?”

He grabs his bag. “If you do, I’ll show her that video.”

You laugh, following him out of the rink. “You’re the worst.” You note how strange it is that he spent so little time on the ice as you two walk out, but you do not say anything about it.

“Hey, you’re the one throwing threats around.”

“Yeah,” you argue, “but my threat is clearly better.”

He rolls his eyes, pushing you again.

You two keep chatting on the way to the theatre about anything and everything, from new bands to upcoming games to the newest blockbuster horror movies. You are not personally on the hockey team, but, as his friend, it is your duty to care. Besides, you figure, it gives you something to look forward to.

The movie is fine. You convince him against sneaking an entire pizza in, you split a bucket of popcorn, and you give him shit for getting freaked out by the disembowelment scene. It is payback for him teasing you about crying during the last movie you two went to a couple of days ago.

You two stand at the streetlight.

“Dude, it’s like eight,” he groans. “It’s not even late.”

“True,” you agree. “Counterpoint: I still have another week’s worth of work to do by Friday on top of the homework I’ll have to do anyway, so unless you wanna help—”

“Forget I asked.” He pulls his hood up against the autumn wind. “Need me to walk you back?”

“Nah.” You shrug. “If someone mugs me, they’ll give me an excuse to not do my homework.”

“Murdered?

“I’m already halfway there.”

He grins. “See ya tomorrow, Y/N.”

“See ya, Jones.” You wave as he runs off.

The walk home is quiet and considerably easier than it was a couple of weeks ago. Seeing as you now get queasy whenever you get into a car, you have been limited to taking the subway and walking, which, among other things, has contributed positively to your physical strength. You know that you should probably at least try to take the bus or a cab around town to build your tolerance up, but the last time you tried, you had almost tripped and fallen from how shaky your legs were getting out. Oddly enough, you note as you go through the door, you do not have a considerably larger fear of heights than you did before, or of fire, but cars were tripping you up, even though you were the one that crashed it. You feel thankful that, at least, you do not think your fear is crippling. At least, you reason, you can still get into the car.

You lock the door behind you, debating whether you feel like adding to the collection of cuts you now possess— they are self-inflicted, but not intentionally so; you stubbornly refuse to acknowledge the fact that you physically cannot use your hands to cut things. You decide against it tonight, tossing your bag on the bed as you sprawl across it, admittedly exhausted. You allow yourself a couple of seconds with your eyes closed before you pull yourself up with a groan and get back to work.

A part of you wishes that you had the physical energy to stay out longer. You are always trying to find excuses not to sleep, and although the mountain of homework and readjusting your timelines for things you missed is certainly one way to keep yourself preoccupied, it is not exactly what you would consider fun. Then again, reliving your greatest traumas while you sleep is not exactly fun either.

You catch yourself peeling at the newly applied bandages on your fingers, fingernails catching under the crudely applied adhesives. Applying bandages properly requires more dexterity and patience than you currently possess, and you are hardly going to ask someone else for help with something as stupid as that. You have lasted this long without needing too much help. People can live by themselves. You will live, probably. Well? Not your concern.

‘I should eat something.’ Your eyes strain to focus on the piece of paper in front of you, your mind wandering aimlessly as you try to impress the actual importance of finishing this upon yourself, but you find that is an insurmountable feat.

You drop your bag off the side of the bed, reaching down and pulling your shoe off, leaning back into your pillows, the weight of the day practically immobilizing you. Fumbling hands switch the lamp off, bathing your room in momentary, blissful darkness before the gravity of your decision sets in.

“Alright, me,” you breathe to yourself. “What’s it gonna be today? My folks? Bradford? What’s his face? Hell,” you chuckle, “why not all three? I’m sadistic enough, I’m sure.”

You close your eyes. “Give me your worse,” you challenge as you slip into unconsciousness.

Two weeks.

He had kept his distance for about two weeks. It was not as if he did not care or was not morbidly curious what the crash had done to you—his glances through the curtains did not tell him much-- but, after some debate, he had figured you needed time to recuperate before you would want his company. Two weeks, he figured, would be enough time for you to get back on your feet or, at least, for you to start wanting company.

His excuse to see you had come in the form of his brother’s newfound prideful boasting. Feigning insult was as good an excuse as any to go see you; after all, he just so happened to be in the neighborhood anyway, and it was normal to pop in to see someone if you were already just a couple blocks down, right? Sneaking away was easy enough—they would not mind his absence—and he, after much prep work, knew exactly how and why he was going to say the things he would to get in your good favor. The plan, he knows, would have gone swimmingly.

His plans seem asinine when he hears you crying.

His brothers do not cry much. He does not, either; it was a habit that they had all thoroughly bullied themselves out of when they were much younger and, if they still did, he knew nothing of it. His master did not encourage this, per se, but talked, then, frequently about the importance of maintaining a more stoic disposition and not allowing emotions to cripple you in battle. Practically, Donatello was satisfied with that explanation, having not properly cried for more than a year now. To hear the sound again, especially coming from you, was novel.

Novel, too, is how you are crying. The sound is less of actual sobbing and more of you being strangled, quiet gasps for air escaping your lips as you shake on the bed, curled in on yourself and clutching at your chest as if whatever pain you are experiencing is centered and can be relieved by something between your collarbones. His eyes, for the first time, trace the lines on your skin, your sleeves riding up your arms to reveal them to him, tears racing down and along the gash in your face. Everything about the scene, from the soft gasping of panic to your position to the heavy scarring, is completely foreign to him, rivaled only by one or two particularly hard nights when he and his brother were much younger.

He slides in through the window, leaning onto the bed. His fingers flick your lamp back on as he grabs your shivering shoulder tightly, shaking you awake as he mumbles words of encouragement. He is not sure if his help will be appreciated, if snapping you out of it was even what he is supposed to do in this situation, but now is not the time to think of that. You are in pain. He can offer you this kindness. “Wake up,” he pleads, not thinking of how this would look until your eyes snap open to look at him.

Immediately, the reality of the situation sets in, and he scrambles off the bed. ‘Why did I think that would be a good idea?’ Panic. ‘You just walked into her room like a fucking creep. See, now she’s going to—’

“Sorry.”

He blinks, looking up at you from his place on the floor. “Huh?”

You clear your throat, wiping the tears from your eye with your sleeve quickly as you bring your knees to your chest, voice hoarse. “Sorry,” you repeat. “That you… I’m not sure what I’m apologizing for, but I know I should be apologizing.”

He is completely dumbfounded.

Your eyes glance to the open window. “I should probably start closing and locking my window, right?” You rub the back of your neck, voice clearing the longer you talk. “It didn’t occur to me since I’m so high up, but if you guys can get in, The Foot can too, right?”

‘Why is she apologizing?’

You push the hair out of your face. ‘You need something, right? I—uh—need to stop saying ‘right’ so much.” You shake your head to clear it. “’ Sup?”

He hears himself mumble some bullshit out about being in the neighborhood.

You sigh. “Sorry.” You close your eyes. “I’m usually up later; I’ve been so tired lately.”

‘Is she serious right now?’ He is completely lost. ‘She was just crying her eyes out in her sleep and now she’s apologizing? Did I miss something?’ You are smiling now, eyes still bloodshot, as if the whole thing is a figment of his imagination, still shivering where you sit.

He rises to his feet, kneeling in front of you on the bed. “What was it about?”

You blink, seemingly confused. “Huh?”

“Your nightmare,” he clarifies. “You were crying. What was it about?”

You avert eye contact. “Nothing too crazy,” you shrug. “Just about the crash. Nothing too exciting.” If possible, he thinks the bags under your eyes are worse than the last time you saw him.

He takes your hands loosely, turning them palms up to look, for the first time, at the patchwork quilt that is now your skin. “What happened in it?” He runs his thumb along the lines, keeping his voice low; he remembers how that used to help when Mikey used to have fits when they were younger. Leonardo and Raphael were never good at that; they took better to being more violently snapped out of their moods, but, then again, they never had this kind of breakdown; theirs were always more driven by loathing, self or otherwise.

You pause, still not looking him in the face as your muscles relax. He remembers, vividly, how he had done something similar when you two had first met, how much better, health-wise, you looked. ‘How long has it been since then? Three months? A little less?’

You take a deep breath. “Just… family shit,” you mumble, eyelids drooping as you trace his frame loosely. “Fire.”

Your gaze is piercing as you finally look at him properly. He feels something catch in his throat as you bow your head.

“It’s my fault, you know.” Your voice is so soft, barely a whisper. “That they’re dead, I mean.”

The air is a suffocating blanket that smothers you both.

“I never told you, did I?” Your focus does not shift as it might have a bit ago. It is locked solely and intensely on him, taking in every detail of his expression. “How I died? How they died? Why I died?”

Hesitantly, he shakes his head. He thinks it best to just be quiet and let you talk. He does not think he has ever heard anyone speak in quite the same tones, ever looked at him quite the same way you are.

You take another breath. “I wanted to try my hand at baking.” You force your eyes to stay focused on his. “I was—still am—not good about sleep. I always slept bad, and never at the right times. I used to take pills for it, to try to get myself back on track.”

He sees where this is going.

“I thought I could still stay up as late as I was used to.” You glance to the side, stealing yourself a second before focusing back on the boy in front of you. “I sat down in my room, turned on a movie. I set a timer. I fell asleep.” You swallow, hands shaking in his. “I can’t smell well, either. I must not have smelled the burning.” Your lips curl in a bitter smile. “Sure as fuck felt it, though, when I woke up.”

He lets you finish.

You try to blink the tears out of your eyes. “They were asleep,” Your voice rises ever so slightly. “I fell asleep at two something. I woke up when they started yelling.” You purse your lips, face reddening in shame as your nostrils flair. “They were trying to get someone out of bed when the roof caved in above them. My door got blocked.”

You feel yourself smile.

“So,” you strain not to cry, “that, Donatello, is why I’m here and why I’m dead, and why I really do deserve to burn again.” You laugh. “Hell, my body count is rivaling some serial killers, so that’s… that’s certainly something.”

He lets go of your hands, face blank.

You lean forward, placing your hands on your knees. “I don’t blame you,” You wipe a wayward tear out of your eyes, trying to swallow the frog in your throat. “Fuck, man, I’d think less of me, too, if it were me.” You nod towards the window. “I get it if you want to leave, but I thought you might want to know why—”

He stops you mid-sentence, wrapping his arms around you and pulling you to him.

Your arms lay slack at your sides as you try to process what is happening.

He does not say a word.

You break.

You burry your face into him, tears welling in your eyes as you let out a strangled sob. You hold onto him tightly as you struggle to breathe, body shaking as you wrap your own arms around him the best you can. The sound roars in your ears like thunder, the deafening quiet of the apartment punctuated only by your own cries. He gently holds you there, resting his head on top of yours. Each sound you make sounds as though you are physically being choked by your guilt, and his chest feels as though it is being crushed by an invisible hand as he listens to your pain.

Neither of you knows how long you stay like that.

He considers telling you a story from a long time ago, about some training he and his brothers had back then, but thought better of it; he does not want to upset you any more than you already are, and being in good company with someone like him may not be exactly what you need right now. Granted, he does not know what you do need, but he knows listening to him talk about bashing brains would not help your sensibilities any.

Instead, he stays quiet.

You pull away after a while, wiping your face off again as you mumble out an apology.

“Don’t apologize.” He clears his throat. “It’s good to cry; it releases endorphins.”

You smile at that. “Well,” you giggle tearfully, “if it releases endorphins.”

He smiles back, face flushing. You look good, he thinks, even with your face all red. He knows that, scientifically, there is probably a reason, but he cannot think of it right now.

He stands up. “I’ll get—”

You grab his hand tightly.

He looks back at you.

“Can I ask a favor?”

He blinks. “Of course,” he agrees easily. “Anything.”

You glance off. “Promise not to take it weird?”

He feels his heart rate increase. “Y-yeah,” he nods.

He feels you pull him gently back on the bed. “Can you stay here tonight?”

His eyes widen as they flicker between the mattress and you. “What,” he clarifies breathlessly, “like sleep with you?”

You nod.

“In the same bed?”

You hesitate, nod again.

He clears his throat, face heating again. “Like, actually?”

“If it wasn’t actually, I wouldn’t ask, would I?” You grip his hand tightly. “I just really don’t want to be alone tonight.”

‘Oh.’ He mentally kicks himself. ‘She’s scared. Don’t make her uncomfortable.’

“It’s alright if you don’t—”

He is extremely quick to reassure you that he is more than happy—‘Bad choice of wording.’—to stay tonight until you fall asleep, but that he would not stay the whole night as to not worry his brothers.

You nod in agreement. “That’s fine.” You rub the back of your neck. “Not sure I would be good company when I wake up, anyway; I still have class.”

“Oh, right.” He nods in understanding, pushing himself further onto the bed. “Which side…?”

You shrug. “Which way do you face?”

“I usually lie on my stomach.”

“Then it doesn’t matter.” You slide your sweatshirt over your head after a bit of squirming around, tossing it onto the couch.

His face is now scarlet. “Okay then,” he mumbles, laying down on the side away from the window. ‘Is she going to—no, stop that.’

You look over at him, face down on the mattress. You can almost feel the heat coming off him. “Are you alright there, buddy?”

He nods.

You shrug, laying down under the blanket and curling into him, facing the window. “Mind getting the light?”

He reaches over, clicking it off.

You sigh in content, turning to face him, teetering on the edge of the mattress. “I’m not venomous,” you inform him teasingly. “I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again: of the two of us, you should not be the one who’s a nervous wreck.”

“You dunno that.” His voice is muffled by the bed.

“You’re the strong one,” you argue.

“So?” He turns his head to look at you. “I’m the guy laying in the—I’m just gonna stop that sentence.”

“It’s only bad if it isn’t consensual.” You smile reassuringly. “I invited you to lay with me, right? So, unless I make you uneasy, then we’re all good.”

He breaks eye contact. “So,” he clarifies, “you don’t mind if I move closer to you?”

You shake your head.

He hesitantly slides himself further onto the bed. “Can I move closer than this?”

“You’ve already seen me bawl my eyes out. You’re doing me a service. Move as close or as far as you want.”

He moves to press his side against you. “Is this fine?”

You nod. “Look, how about this?” You rest your arm under your head. “If you do something I’m uncomfortable with, the safe word is pina colada.”

‘We already have a safe word?’ He was not sure if he is on cloud nine or just terrified of you.

You are very confused why he looks so warm. “Do you need me to turn the AC on?”

He shakes his head. “I’m good,” he assures you tightly. Slowly, he reached an arm out and over your waist, pulling you closer. You do not seem to resist in any way, wrapping your good leg around one of his to pull him closer.

‘Conscious touching.’ He glances down at you, trying to act cool. ‘Conscious, intentional touching. She smells so nice and she feels—okay, this is not going to work if you keep being a perv.’

“Thanks,” you mumble, humming softly. “I appreciate this more than you know.”

Cloud nine. Definitely on cloud nine.

“Every time.”

You giggle.

He blinks. “What?”

“Every time,” you note, already nodding off. “Like in that book.”

‘Which one?’ “They wrote it down for a reason, right?” The longer he spends like this, the smoother he feels.

“Totally.” You smile, closing your eyes. “Just know that this goes both ways, alright? If you ever need help like this, you know who to call.”

This is new. ‘Help like this? What, like crying?’ His eyebrows furrow as he tries to understand what you mean. ‘Or he means if I ever need company in my—what did I just say?’

You pick up on his confusion. “Emotional help, I mean.” Your fingers trace the indentations in his shell absentmindedly. “I mean, I know sometimes I didn’t want to go to my family about stuff. I dunno if you have that…” you trail off, realizing that you might be unintentionally bashing his brothers. You sincerely do not want to blow this.

“I mean,” he says after a bit, “I think I get what you’re talking about.” He sighs. “You mean stuff that they’d make fun of me for, right?”

You nod.

He feels his heart melt a little. “I’ll have to take you up on that.”

You forgot how safe he makes you feel. “Goodnight, Donnie,” you mumble sleepily.

“Goodnight, Y/N.”

You pass out not long after that. If he has to estimate a general amount of time, he will clock it in at about five minutes. He does not move, however, until about thirty minutes before sunrise, too busy listening to the sound of your breathing and memorizing how exactly your body feels next to his. As he slips out of the window, early morning air waking him back up completely, he wonders if, someday, he could stay to see you wake up next to him. Not out of necessity, but just because you both wanted to stay like that for a while more.

‘I hope so. It’s a nice dream to have, anyhow.’

Table of Contents

Chapter 9

Chapter 11

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