fictionalabyss

[fictionalabyss]

Sorry, things are going a little tough. I know how it is. You take care of yourself and Pat and those boys. That's what's important, not this little wild and crazy app. I'll miss you. I will be here when and if you come back. You can message me sometimes if you wish. SLD will always be my favorite, even though it's not complete, I'll complete it in my head. Love you Mel . Take care. Lots of hugs for you

yeahhhhh I'm not sure what my last update was in regards to all that was.. buuuuuuuut... we split. I went through therapy, realized what I needed and wouldn't compromise on it anymore. I am now working and have been since October. I am getting my life back on track in a way it hasn't been since I was 19. I am no longer bottom of my own list. I am doing self care, self love, and spending time with the people most important to me. Depression wise, this is the best I've been my entire adult life. I still have bad days, my panic disorder still can be very crippling, but I am finally GOOD.

@sorenmarie87 has been a HUGE part of that. Dawny has stuck by me through so much shit and i honestly can't thank them enough for it. Nothing I could ever do would be enough in my opinion. One of the best people to ever come into my life.

Other people have helped too, but ya'll don't know them :P

#mel finally gets back on tumblr #mel is finally not depressed every day #mel loves dawn

[fictionalabyss]

I had been scouring the internet for a fic I had read years ago and it turned out to be Milk. Let me tell you, it is just as fucking good ur not better when I first read it!! Had literally never considered a lactation kink before and then I read this and it was over for me, I’m…actually o b s e s s e d now‼️‼️

I'm glad you enjoyed it!

It was actually pretty fun to write.

#mel finally gets back on tumblr

[fictionalabyss]

Hi i just read 47.26 North, 101.78 West, and Finally He's Here, and i loved them. I'm just wondering if you have and plans to do a part 3?

sorry, no. Mostly because I haven't written in like 2 years lol. Also sorry this took forever. When I stopped writing I stopped getting on tumblr.

#mel finally gets back on tumblr

[fictionalabyss]

Quick question. Is your Mobster series posted on any other fanfiction site? Only asking since I can't get to Tumblr during the day. Thanks!!

I'm so sorry this took forever to answer, I haven't been on tumblr in FOREVER (literally years basically) in it's entirety, I don't think so. I think only Patreon is the other place that got it in full. I never finished moving my things to ao3. If it is anywhere else, I did not authorize it and would genuinely be ticked off about it.

#mel finally got back on tumblr #im sorry guys #half sorry #ive been getting my life on track and doing good #and working #a lot of working

[fictionalabyss]

i think it's hilarious that I haven't had shit to do with you for years, haven't even been on tumblr for years, and I still live rent free in your head.

Please, move on.

I have.

#Yes I logged in just for this #Iykyk #Dawny knows #She laughed

[fictionalabyss]

Yeah. Uh. Only problem with that is that I'd be on your door step cuz I don't like people in my house sooooo right back at you lol

sick and tired of living so fucking far away from my mutuals. but yall lucky for that, bc i would absolutely be on your doorstep every day just to hang out. and invite you to do random shit like idk go grocery shopping and to make me company while i clean the house or smth

[fictionalabyss]

Just a note for me.

Masterlist is updated to this point.

carry on.

#i finally updated it #a year later #i'm sorry guys

[fictionalabyss]

March 8th marked my 7 year writing anniversary.

And honestly, I was heartbroken to see that notification pop up on my phone and realize just how long it's been since I've written and posted anything.

[fictionalabyss]

Hey guys.

I haven’t been around for a long time, I know. I’ve been dealing with a lot of shit (some of you know, some of you don’t) and unfortunately I've had to make a tough decision for me, to help myself heal.

I’ve officially stepped down as Admin and Manta ray in the @spnfanficpond .

Michelle offered to keep me on hiatus, as I have been for a while now, but as I watch the notifications, messages, new members and such roll in, I feel a lot of guilt at not being able to mentally deal with any of it. I know Michelle has said a few times that it’s fine because personal life is always more important and I know they just want me good and well again, but I feel like it’s not fair to them and I feel a lot of guilt over it.

I know the door is open to come back any time I feel good enough to go, and I’m so thankful to Michelle for being so understanding and awesome during this past year and a half, because this has been a really tough time for me.

I still don’t know when I’ll be writing again. And that honestly breaks my heart. Writing used to bring me so much joy. Now it’s just a struggle.

I miss you guys.  I miss writing. I miss connecting with everyone in comments and reblogs and discord..

I miss all of this. This was such a massive part of my life for so many years. I don’t know when or if I’ll be able to come back to it, but I honestly hope that I do.

I love you guys. Mel

[fictionalabyss]

Okay but. Let's be honest... We both kinda wish he had. Just a little. Cuz then hed be in this party with us lol

Jesus fuck that voice 🤤

Happy New Year everyone 🧡

[fictionalabyss]

You might not have went out..

BUT YOU GOT THE DRUNKEST MEL ANYONE GOT IN 13 YEARS 🤣🤣🤣🤣

Also yes, happy new years you bitches I love you

Happy New Year everyone 🧡

[fictionalabyss]

(via j5y7reqq4h881.png (640×583))

[fictionalabyss]

Jenna Ortega as Wednesday Adams in WEDNESDAY (2022) ˎˊ˗ —S01E04: Woe What a Night

[fictionalabyss]

You've always been so good and sweet to me, Sandra.

Thank you for still being around after all these years💜

I’ve been neglecting everything lately.

Not only is my mental health in the garbage, but we caught the flu like 3 weeks ago (going into week 4) and I have pneumonia 🙃

@sorenmarie87 is the only tumblr person I have regular contact with lately. And there’s even days where I feel like I’m neglecting her too, even though I KNOW she doesn’t feel that way and understands.

I’m tired of feeling like this. Like I can’t write, can’t think, can’t function. This was such a huge part of my life for so long that I actually really struggle with not being able to do it still. I should have been back by now. 

 I have WIPs. I have things to post. I have things to write. I just…… can’t.

I can’t do any of it.

Wtf is wrong with me?

[fictionalabyss]

I’ve been neglecting everything lately.

Not only is my mental health in the garbage, but we caught the flu like 3 weeks ago (going into week 4) and I have pneumonia 🙃

@sorenmarie87 is the only tumblr person I have regular contact with lately. And there’s even days where I feel like I’m neglecting her too, even though I KNOW she doesn’t feel that way and understands.

I’m tired of feeling like this. Like I can’t write, can’t think, can’t function. This was such a huge part of my life for so long that I actually really struggle with not being able to do it still. I should have been back by now. 

 I have WIPs. I have things to post. I have things to write. I just...... can’t.

I can’t do any of it.

Wtf is wrong with me?

#self loathing i guess #depresso expresso

[fictionalabyss]

I love watching Pope fuck shit up 😍🤤

[fictionalabyss]

Weird question, but if I made some stickers on Canva - how would I go about printing them out?

#my bitch needs help