biting biting biting ripping apart shredding exploding u into a billion pieces biting u to shreds
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i had been used for my body before, i didn't mind it. i had a good trick about it - i didn't have to be there, not in my skin. i could wear the mirror, wear the puppet. you would see your perfect girl, a little monster i had concocted. she would glisten, distilled out of my own blood and venom. it meant i would be using you instead - you think you are taking from me? darling, i think this is a fucking joke, a role i am playing. you can't hurt me, i'm not present for the event. this is just a body, like a book is only words.
and then you came into my life, easy and honest. reaching for my hand in the crowded holiday market. passing me a water before i realize i'm thirsty. checking on me once, twice - the first time i said i'm okay, you knew i was lying. i keep thinking about the shape of your blue eyes and the wild of your hair the last time i saw you. how you got out of my car and when you looked back, i was looking back too. your quiet breathing in a hotel room.
you kissed me like you meant it, is the thing.
i don't know how to be a person yet, not fully. i don't know how to let you kiss me and touch bone. i tell my friends i hate this so much i want to throw up. your name slips into my head - i am no longer really ever alone. a little frazzled heartrate keeps splattering against my collarbone. my therapist asked yesterday - why are you afraid? what is the cost of vulnerability?
a terrifying thought: when i'm with you, it feels like finally coming home.
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poem.
tell me what yall think of it /nf
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what ship would bear either of you, indeed?
inspired by this post by @aureentuluva70
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Welp. Tag tagged by @justplaggin for the game
rules: spell out your name or url with songs
I couldn't resist, and thank you very much for it, Jay/Plagg!
To challenge myself, I'm gonna see if I can stick to songs from anime East Asian shows/stories
A - All-in (Alien Stage)
L - Last Dimension (TRIGGER)
W - wi(l)d-screen baroque (Revue Starlight)
A - Artistic Partisan (ALKALOID x Valkyrie)
Y - Yumemiru Architecture (Kagehira Mika; Enstars)
S - STRONGER & STRONGER (Zool)
A - Ame (MEZZO)
J - Joker Flag (IDOLiSH7)
O - OMEGA (STEREO DRIVE FOUNDATION; Yuukoku no Moriarty)
Y - Yume Shizuku (Re:vale)
F - Forever Note (MEZZO)
U - Until it Dies (覃云; Link Click)
L - Lily (Luck Life; Bungo Stray Dogs)
N - Now and Then (Re:vale)
O - Or the Beautiful Golden Drop (Knights; complete version out on May 22, so have the game version)
T - THE POLiCY (IDOLiSH7)
E - Eccentric Party Night!! (Five Eccentrics)
19 songs...and I tried to find ones that I genuinely enjoy right now (RIP to me making this challenge harder), so hence, the above mostly-Japanese-dominated list.
No pressure tags: @bobisnolongerhere @lizzieonka @rosencrantzsguildenstern @msperfectsheep-posts @mahounonbinary @praise-the-lord-im-dead @nitunio @akitchenknife @teslathelame @koi0boi @mihai-florescu @forebodinglight @imissthembutitwasntadisaster and anyone else seeing this because i am now incredibly curious about what songs you will choose (im so sorry if I forgot someone)
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(apologies if this is long, i will try to keep it short!!)
Sunflowers were what i gave as a plea,
Sunflowers were what i find as you fly free,
and i realise now,
that you were right.
Sunflowers must always face the sun.
Sunflowers will always turn their backs on you.
Just like me.
Congratulations.
You’ve won.
I'm gonna kms /pos
THE CONGRATULATIONS YOUVE WON.... AND I REALIZE NOW THAT YOURE RIGHT..... GRKSHWKSJWLWKQKA THIS IS SO COOL IT FUCKING HURTS WHY DO U DO THISSSSSSSA
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I think we humans mistook about happiness. When we are sad we conceal it with happiness and I am sure we are lacking the understanding of happiness
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in conclusion the most poignant thing about ruina is its running theme of Imperfection. imperfection, focused not on its flaws, but on the miracle of it existing to begin with. imperfection not as a failing, but as a triumph. its cracked, broken, deeply in need of repair-- but it's real and its ours and it exists. despite everything it exists and that enough is a relief beyond words, beyond expression. to present a toppled structure not as a conclusion, but an opportunity.
its the choice-- and the joy-- of looking forward, unflinchingly, and facing it. one step at a time.
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I have not loved you
Because I knew you'd never leave
I have not loved you
Because I thought I needed you
I loved you because I wanted to
I loved you because you were you
And I found that beautiful
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くれて、手を。
開けて、目を。
そして 。。。そして、
これから、起きて。
your hand, give it to me.
your eyes, open them.
and finally... finally,
from here on, get up.
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Look into the Void long enough and it starts looking back
(4/31)
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kaiaŋ! this is the script for my new conlang din ɛgwa :D it's written top to bottom, left to right. everything is connected, so you could technically write an entire book in one long line if you had a really long strip of paper. theres a round and an angular version.
(<gw> is /gʷ/, <y> is /j/, <r> is /ɹ/, <VV> is /Vː/)
and here's a little text written in the script! at the points where one line ends and where another begins is a little dot to show continuity.
Translation under the cut! thanks for reading :)
What did this player dream? This player dreamed of sunlight and trees. Of fire and water. It dreamed it created. And it dreamed it destroyed. It dreamed it hunted, and was hunted. It dreamed of shelter. Does it know that we love it? That the universe is kind? Sometimes, through the noise of its thoughts, it hears the universe, yes.
wɛs obayarɨ raamsa sul? wɛs obayarɨ raamsa ug bɨgwɨniilwɔ yɛ ɔrewo. ug dɨrwɔ yɛ luuswɔ. din raamsa, ide din modena. yɛ din raamsa, ide din gwɨgna. din raamsa, ide din ebigna, yɛ ide din ebigsa. din raamsa ug ɨlsɨlaiwɔ. din ɔdiman ai, ide gom mɔnan din? ide wiisru naugwɔ? ins lɛbɛno, oden rugwu ug yawɔsɨwo ug dɨl, dim legwun wiisru, mai.
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and the universe said I love you
because you are love.
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