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number-onekidqueen · 2 months

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𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐩𝐮𝐭 𝐦𝐞 𝐨𝐧 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐚𝐢𝐝 𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐟𝐚𝐯𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐞

Luke Castellan x Poseidon!fem!reader

hi i have no idea if you take requests but if you do could you write for Luke x daughter of poseidon? I’ve been thinking about someone who’s similar to Luke who’s felt neglected by their God parent and when their half brother Percy comes and gets claimed within a week, she’s angry and jealous bc hers took almost a year. An angel in disguise, evil lovers trope 🥹🎀🫶 just wanted to share this concept that’s been itching my brain

comfort fluff

warnings: crying, gods being bad parents, jealousy, insecurity

The new blond kid furrowed his brow again, and you groaned internally.

“So we’re supposed to love them but they don’t even come and see us?”

The arrival of another kid was always exciting. They’d stumble over the border, scared out of their mind, and once they calmed down, you’d get to hear their story. They all had such different ones and all the details and quirks in them fascinated you to no end.

The less fun part was answering all the questions they had, and trying to make camp seem fun and exciting, when they were usually so broken. It never seemed right to you to talk about rowing races, as if they were antidotes for leaving your old life behind.

Percy Jackson, however, was proving to be more curious and.... confident than new demigods were typically.

You exchanged a look with Luke at Percy's comment, wondering how to answer this curveball of a question. You noticed his jaw was clenched, and he seemed to be making no kind of attempt at responding.

“Well, uh, yeah, more or less.” You replied lamely.

“I don’t get it. If we’re their kids why don’t they come down and visit us? Get to know us?”

“My question exactly,” Luke murmured bitterly to you, but then he grinned, clapping Percy on the shoulder.

“Eh, the gods they’re busy and all. But you don’t have to worry about them. Burn a bit of your food, pray sorta regularly and they’ll be happy. And just enjoy-"

“Who's my dad?”

Another difficult question.

"Sorry Percy, we don't know," you replied softly. "you'll know when you get claimed."

"Claimed?"

You explained the claiming process, and your unease grew as Percy frowned more and more as you continued. It was obvious he was against claiming.

"So let me get this straight," Percy paused, his expression one of utter distaste. "I've gotta do something cool - something amazing - in my first few days at camp to make my dad notice me?"

You winced. "Yeah, something like that."

"He doesn't just come down, and recognise me?" He asked in disbelief.

"The gods don't really... come down, Percy," Luke corrected, also wincing.

"So, what, they-"

"Don't stress too much about it, Percy. I'm sure your dad will claim you soon, and then we can all celebrate." You reassured with a grin.

If only that had been right.

---------

And you had won! You whooped, joining the cacophony of victory that was the Hermes cabin, all gazing triumphantly at the flag Luke had captured and was brandishing with pride.

When your eyes met Luke’s, your head spun. He had really done it! Your best friend, your amazing, brave best friend had won it again! He grinned at you, and your heart seemed to jump towards him erratically. Before you could think straight, you were running closer, and-

“Y/N! I think you have a brother?”

Huh?

Brother?

You noticed the atmosphere had changed drastically, and the campers had become hushed around you, whispering and pointing. And they were all… kneeling?

“Percy Jackson, son of Poseidon!”

At Chiron's call, you turned to where they faced and saw a dumbstruck Percy, thigh-high in water, squinting above him.

At a massive, glowing green trident.

Poseidon. He was your brother.

What?!

After the initial tidal wave of shock, and even joy for Percy wore off, you were outraged. Percy had been at camp for what couldn’t have been two days. And he was already claimed? When it took you nearly a year of hoping and crying and praying to do so?

What in the Gods did this mean? Were you not as special as Percy? Did your dad hate you? What in the- what- he- you- he-

You couldn’t think about it anymore, your thoughts incoherent and speeding through your mind. Your chest tightened, and you couldn't breathe, your lungs still and your eyes heavy with tears.

No, no, no, no. You wouldn’t ruin your brother’s claiming.

Even though your father ruined everything-

You began stumbling back, walking between rows of kneeling campers, as quietly as you could. It still seemed thunderous to your ears. You could feel the stares, but you tried not to think about that either. Judgement was at the bottom of your stress agenda.

Once the forest obscured your form, you began sprinting, dodging trees and shrubbery as you made a rapid escape to your cabin. The anxious thoughts didn't stop, even as the world rushed past you.

Breathe in, breathe- my dad hates me- out.

Breathe- he loves my brother more- in.

bre- he'll never love me as much- out.

b- you weren’t good enough, and you never have been- r-e-a-t-h-e

Once inside, you collapsed against the cool door. Your breathing finally slowed, as your eyes travelled over the familiar blue scenery. Felt the slightly chipped paint beneath your fingerprints. Inhaled the salty, sandy smell. This was your home. You could safely cry in here, feel comfortable, do anything you wanted-

Until Percy came.

You wouldn’t even have five minutes in here before everyone came back, and swung the doors wide for Percy. And you would be forgotten, shoved into a lesser position to make room for your shiny, new brother.

Stop! It wasn't Percy's fault that Poseidon was a terrible father. Percy was innocent. He was just a little boy, wanting to be accepted. It wasn't fair to feel bitter towards Percy.

But you couldn't help it.

Either way, you wouldn't let the first sight to his new home be his crying, jealous sister. You didn't want him to feel guilty for belonging.

But where else could you go?

The beach?

No. The water was once a comfort, but it seemed a hellish sight in your mind now. You didn't want to go anywhere near anything that reminded you of Poseidon. Absolutely not.

The forest?...

That was perfect.

Steeling yourself for the outside world, you inhaled shakily before rushing out of the safety of your door. Thankfully, camp was still quiet, although you weren't going to wait around for it to become full and rowdy.

Taking off at a jog, you made your way into the forest surrounding camp, in the opposite direction than the one campers would make coming back. Sure, monsters could attack you, but at this point you were certain you were angry enough to wield your dagger with lethal accuracy.

Come get me, bitch, and you'll find out just how I feel, you thought to yourself.

You moved through the forest until the dappled light on your tanned skin, became dimmer, almost dark. It was then you stopped, hunched over, breathing deeply, stepped backward to slump against a firm pine tree.

You let yourself cry, as loudly as you needed. The ocean never hushed her screams, and now that you were alone, neither would you. It was cathartic in a way, screaming as loud as you could, sobbing as hard as you needed, draining your body of all its sadness, jealousy, insecurity.

No one would ever hear you. It would be a secret between you and this little green glade.

And then you could return to camp, fake all the smiles you needed. You would be happy for Percy. You would be grateful to your father for allowing you to have a brother. You would be faithful and in admiration of the Gods.

You felt sick at those thoughts, a pit growing in your stomach at having to betray yourself for others.

Why did it have to be this way? Why?

The pit in your stomach only grew as you heard fast-paced approaching footsteps. Your sobs immediately halted, and you stilled against the tree, wiping your tears and drawing your dagger.

"Y/n?"

It was Luke.

You exhaled shakily, debating whether to respond. But it was Luke, and surely he would understand.

"Yeah?"

His approaching footsteps resumed, and you caught a glimpse of his face, splashed with relief. Immediately, he sat beside you, and wrapped a tentative arm around your shoulders.

It was so comforting, and you began to cry once more, this time into his shoulder. His fingers tangled in your hair, and they were so soothing, your cries became even deeper and cracked.

You couldn't remember the last time you had been held and comforted.

"What's wrong?" he muttered softly.

"My-my dad," you replied croakily.

"Oh," you knew he understood, because he tugged you closer and pressed a kiss to the top of your head. You shuddered at the contact, flustered despite your current emotions.

"Your dad is an idiot for making you feel like this."

"You-you can't say that," you said nervously, shifting in his arms as you glanced around, anticipating a megatsunami or hailstorm.

"I don't care, y/n, let me drown the next time I swim. You need to hear it. You're one of the best campers there is, and all you do is love him, and he treats you like this! He's an idiot!" He said earnestly, laughing a little.

"I just can't believe he'd claim him so soon," you whispered, and the tears began again, "I just-- it's like slapping it in my face that he loves him more. That Percy did enough for him and I didn't."

"No, don't you dare think like that." He tilted your chin up with his fingers. His eyes were strong, angry. But his fingers were gentle, and they caressed your jawline with care. "You've done more than enough for him. You've done more than enough for anyone, don't ever make yourself feel like this."

"But-"

"No. No. Never." And he drew you back into a tight embrace as the last of your tears flowed.

You stayed like that for what could've been minutes or decades, the both of you breathing in sync, against the rough bark of the tree and warm heat of your camp tees. You began to grow sleepy, your eyes drifting closed, and that's when Luke shifted.

"Hey," he murmured, his arms still wrapped around you as he pulled the both of you to your feet, "let's get you home."

Off you walked into the dusky evening, your words and secrets left embedded in the canopy and grass of that glade and deep in your hearts.

For while you now knew there were two children of Poseidon, and you were most certainly the second choice - you knew you were the favourite to Luke.

And maybe that was what mattered.

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hanase · 7 months

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I am obsessed with Atem right now. It's been going on for a few months. There's a story here but I can't write for shit. I'll upload a lot more soon!

#pharaoh atem #atem #yugioh #I've always loved youuu #destroy me my king #we are in for some fucked up ride my boooooi #Finally #eyes I can get behind after 20 years trying #I tried forever to do some semirealistic eyes and I was never satisfied so fuck them we keep them stylized #I am still bad at his hair but I like the crazy approach tbh #not his bangs tho those are easy #also what a fucking boss you are #a beautiful god yesplz #fair warning #I am going to post triggering stuff with him involved soon #I'll tag properly!

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animeshen-art · 2 months

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Bleed Magic

(I'm sorry that everything I paint is Neon Hell)

Lawrence belongs to @gatobob

#fanart #boyfriend to death #btd2 #btd2 fanart #boyfriend to death 2 #btd2 lawrence #lawrence oleander #neon hell #I have no idea if this needs any trigger warnings #sorry mom sorry god

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bcitisthelight · 10 months

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hey remember when we were discussing how weird the whole cliegg thing is in AOTC. and you had thoughts, feelings and emotions. tell me about those XOXO

(Big TW for this post - I discuss human trafficking, sex trafficking, rape, child abuse, slavery, and PTSD in this post. It's about the realities of slavery and Tatooine and how it involves the Skywalkers.) Something that I almost never see in any discussion on the Lars family is how sharply the fanon headcanons and characterizations of diverge from the ones we get in the moves. Like, particularly Cliegg and the prequel trilogy. Like - I feel like there's this automatic assumption that the Lars loved Shmi and that they cared for Luke out of dedication to her and her family, and it's this huge found family vibe but like can I be real. Can I be super real right now. It’s something that I find kind of baffling, because when I watched Attack of the Clones, and on every rewatch since (and there have been many), it always seems kind of obvious to me that Cliegg bought Shmi as a slave, presumably as a house slave, if not outright as a part of sex trafficking. And I don't mean in one of those "He bought her to free her, he's a good guy, etc etc". I mean, he bought her as a slave with the original intention of keeping her as a slave. And what's really interesting, is you can get pretty much all the clues about that from the exchanges between Anakin has with Watto, his and Shmi's former master.

Again, I want to stress that, because I think it's crucial that we see this for what it is - not an exchange between a former employee and his boss, not an exchange between a kid and a member of his former community. His former slavemaster. The man who won him and his mother in a gambling game like so many fancy necklaces. The source and object of Anakin's childhood enslavement. Watto would have beaten them. He made Anakin, a child of 9 - and I read somewhere once that Anakin started in the races at 6 - ride in a pod race that no human has ever won before, with the full expectation that he would die. This is a being whose entire life has revolved around the certainty that society is not only capable of functioning, but functions best, when sentient beings can be bought and sold like property. And, to be real with you, because this is a thing that happens to people who suffer enslavement, he very likely loaned them out temporarily for sex trafficking purposes for a quick buck - a practice that is noted historically in virtually every society that operated on a system involving slaves.

It's important to recap that, because I do think it's impossible to understand how deeply horrifying the conversation they have is without that context. Like, let's look at how he tells Anakin about Shmi -

This scene is....so telling to me. From the outset, Watto said he sold her as a slave. Like, it was a slave exchange. Watto heard about her freedom later - clearly, Cliegg bought her, and behaved in a way - intentional or not - that Watto believed he was buying her as a slave to own as a slave. That part is not subtext, that's just actual text.

"But Mikhayla" some will say "he freed her the second he bought her - he bought her in order to free her." Except....there is genuinely nothing in the movies, and off the top of my head, the wider narrative, that ever indicates that that's true. In fact it makes no sense in that case, for Watto to have not known that Cliegg was buying her in order to free her. Why would he have to hide that? Watto presumably doesnt care what happens to her, because he's selling her. In the larger materials, its said that his shop fell on hard times, and in the movies, we can see the proof. The script says he's sitting outside his shop, but at that point it resembles more of a kind of beaten down stand. He's still selling junk, but less and of poorer quality - presumably, he's spent all his money on gambling debts. And the thing is, slaves are expensive. He sold her years prior, and I bet he fed himself on that money for a very long time - he was a very motivated seller, as barbaric as that language is to use about a transaction involving a human person. He's not going to be fussy over why the person buying her wants to buy her. There's also the fact that this is a society that vastly runs on slavery, and large plantation owners would often "rent" out slaves to smaller but still profitable farms. And Cliegg is a moisture farmer with presumably a large tract of land for water vaporizers. If anything, I can see Watto having rented Shmi to her, Cliegg taking a liking to her, and then approaching Watto to buy her. I mean, if he's profitable enough to just buy a slave, then he clearly had at least some money. "He spent his whole savings!" Show me that in the text. "He loved her from the start!" Show me that in the text. "But Mikhayla," yet others will say, "he did free her! And then married her! He clearly meant from the start to free her, and only bought her to get her away from Watto. He could have never seen her as property. Who would marry their slave?" Except, in the real world, this is...another thing we see across multiple historical records, masters buying women as slaves and then later freeing them in order to legally marry them. PARTICULARLY in societies that operate so heavily on an entire caste system involving slaves - we can look to the Roman Empire, for example. Countless Roman officials, merchants, and military officials bought women, fell in love with them, and freed them in order to marry them. "But maybe she said yes!" (I know these are not your objections, but as you know, I'm an attorney, which means I constantly have to find an argument to fight against). So, to this imaginary detractor I say: I feel like it should be rather obvious, but I'll say it just in case - it is impossible for a slave to consent to any action they perform at the request of a slave master. It cannot happen. A woman who is enslaved cannot consent to marrying the man who bought her, and who has very likely been raping her up until this point, and wants to now marry her - usually, to make any children he had by her legally his children, and therefore citizens, rather than slaves themselves.

So really, whether or not Cliegg had a change of heart doesn't actually change my mind about his actions towards Shmi. I don't care if Cliegg DID love her - in fact, I'm sure he DID love her. People can and have convinced themselves of all kinds of moral superiority, people can claim to love someone while owning them as property! Shmi could never consent to marrying a man who held her as a slave. Even if he freed her, and she willing chose to stay there for a few years, and then he asked her to marry him. In my head, you can't overcome that power imbalance. Cliegg will never not be a man who once believed Shmi was a thing to be owned. He will never be a man who didn't see her as property. Like, at some point, it actually becomes kind of more and more unlikely that this is a guy who took up this transaction for non-malicious purposes. Because we simply do not see it in the movie. What I see in the movie is a slave owner saying he fell on hard times and sold his slave to a farmer who probably needed help on his land or in his house - he has no wife, so the latter is probably more likely. I see him saying that at the time of the transaction, he had no idea that Cliegg intended to free her. And for all that Cliegg calls Shmi his darling, his love, his wife - not once do we ever hear of any evidence that Shmi saw this as a love match. In fact, the only thing we find out about her daily life with the Lars family is that in the mornings, she wakes up early and goes to pick mushrooms. You know. A task for the house. An unpleasant task, done before everyone else is awake, that she does absolutely alone. I'm just saying. These implications are not good ones. I will say though, for all this, do you know what really sells me on the idea that the relationship between Shmi and Cliegg is is not a consensual one, is Anakin's reaction to it. This is a boy whose entire hopes and dreams have revolved around his mother's freedom. You have more excellent writing than me on this, but the moral injury Anakin suffers leaving his mother behind is. Intense. All he wants is to one day free her. In a way, a part of him is always that tiny boy who couldn't bear the idea of leaving behind his mom, who swore, the last time he saw her, that he would free her. And at this moment, all of his dreams have seemingly come true! His mother is free. According to Watto, she's found love, and married. For all he knows, she's had other children. Maybe that could involve SOME complicated emotions, but mostly you would expect that he would feel, at the very least, relieved. Happy. Interested, curious. Instead, this is his reaction:

He's grim, business like. He is not happy. He is not relieved. He doesn't even seem to acknowledge that she's still alive - the way he reacts is not a man who thinks his mother is out of danger. To Anakin, who grew up enslaved until 9 and knows how this society works, it seems almost immediately apparent that the Lars are just a different kind of danger. There's also this rather interesting detail:

This is a boy who bleeds, every second of every day, longing for a family. He basically begs at obi-wan's feet day and night, to be acknowledged as a son. His reaction to his wife's pregnancy is radiant joy - his reaction to know she could die, profound existential horror. I mean good god, he basically turns Palpatine aka Satan Himself into a father figure, because he's that desperate for one. And here, this man is claiming him as his family. He's talked about being excited to see him. He talks about planning with Shmi to meet him. He calls him "son". And Anakin doesn't give him another moment of his time, the second those words are out of his mouth. It's silence. For a boy who is so starved for intimacy he genuinely falls in love with the very first girl who was ever nice to him, to react to a claim of relationship this way. It's bizarrely out of character for him. Unless it isn't. UNLESS he's disgusted by that claim, instead of relieved by it. If he thinks his mother has been bought and then forced into marriage, of course he hates Cliegg. I remember when we were watching the movie together, and remember I said to you "You can just tell Anakin is thinking, 'Call me son one more fucking time'" And can I be real, I have so much more to say about this. As you know, I actually have essays of opinions and feelings about Shmi Skywalker and her horrible life, and how Anakin was the one bright point she had in that horrible life. I have feelings about how she gave away her only happiness, because she knew he did not deserve the life of a slave. I had ideas about how you could turn this into a way to actually fix AOTC and make it better, a way you could use it as an excuse to get rid of the Tusken arc entirely without losing the tragedy of his mother's death. But this post is already so fucking long and I'm sure you're tired of me talking xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

#star wars #human trafficking tw #abuse tw #csa tw #rape tw #slavery tw #all the trigger warnings #GOD THIS MADE ME REALIZE HOW MUCH I FUCKING LOVE SHMI SKYWALKER #BECAUSE SHE HAD JUST #THE SHITTIEST LIFE RIGHT #LIKE SHES BORN INTO SLAVERY AND SHE DIES IN SLAVERY SHE LOSES EVERYTHING HER SON IS GONE SHES MARRIED TO HER SLAVE MASTER SHE DIES IN PAIN #BUT HER LOVE FOR ANAKIN WAS SO GOOD #SO INTENSELY AFFECTIONATE AND VALIDATING #EVEN IN ALL THAT HELL #THAT WHEN ITS RIPPED AWAY FROM HIM FOR GOOD ANAKIN BASICALLY LOSES HIMSELF ENTIRELY

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aeonophagic · 9 months

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me, the jester, asked the court if yaoi could bloom even on a battlefield. the court was so kind as to even help me care for the fields for it to sprout and then bloom — is it my fault?

bonus

#trigger warning honkai impact 3rd yaoi #honkai impact 3rd #hi3rd #otto apocalypse #kevin kaslana #ottokevin #‘what the fuck is this’ my visions #this has canon foundation i simply took it further than any manwoman would’ve ever dared to #i unfortunately do not choose what to fixate on #did you know they both have religious references #that easily intertwine with each other #because kevin is compared to satan but he is also compared to god himself #the rains of hell upon sodom and gomorrah were the cleaver of shamash #im not making that up #*slaps otto apocalypse* this white boy can fit so much religious trauma #i mean imagine being raised in the church itself when you don’t believe #id be religiously traumatized too #if you want to know more about them ch17 is where you want to go #stage 1 #they talk for like 10 minutes #they also meet in the church in kolosten months later #they have a diplomatic partnership most people don’t know about #senti even warns kevin to stay clear of otto #even mei warns him #but kevin doesn’t give a fuck #he says that if otto brings the world down with him #it will be beneficial #LMAO #partners in crime #tbh

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lesbianrobin · 1 year

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Seeing as it's Black History Month, I'm gonna take a break from your regularly scheduled girlblogging to be a film nerd and beg every single person reading this post to go and watch Within Our Gates (1920).

Within Our Gates is a feature-length silent film written and directed by black filmmaker Oscar Micheaux and it is a miracle that we have it today. The film was believed to be lost for years until a SINGLE surviving print was found in Spain, translated back into English, and recut to match the original as closely as possible. (This is actually not uncommon in the realm of old film a lot of lost films get found in random closets but ANYWAY.) The film tells the story of Sylvia, a southern schoolteacher who travels up north to raise money to keep her school open. It explores how her life and family have been affected by racism, abuse, and sexual violence, as she falls in love, works to save her school, and grapples with her place as a black woman in the antebellum south. If that's not enough to get you interested, the film is also kinda batshit. There are shootouts! Affairs! Someone gets hit by a car! It's wild and dramatic and incredibly engaging.

You've heard of Birth of a Nation, right? Maybe you've even seen it. That insanely racist piece of film history premiered in 1915. Oftentimes people will defend D.W. Griffith and the film itself as being "a product of its time." Well, Within Our Gates premiered in 1920, and it is a product of its time. It depicts white mob violence against black Americans, and how that violence destroys innocent lives and rips families apart. It is written and directed by a black man. All of its lead actors are black. It is an absolutely heart-wrenching, moving, and intelligent film, produced on a shoestring budget, that explores what it meant not only to be a black American in 1920, but what it meant to be a black woman. Different characters have different approaches to coping with racism and strategies for protecting themselves. It's complicated, and upsetting, and one of the most impactful films I've ever seen.

If you can spare an hour and twenty minutes, if you happen to have access to the film through a streaming service (in addition to being FREE ON YOUTUBE, I believe it's on Amazon Prime, Paramount+, MGM+, and some Hulu plans) or an institution (you may have access to Kanopy or a similar platform via your local library or university), it's worth a watch. Play whatever music you want in the background if your version doesn't have any added! Even if you can't watch it for whatever reason, I'd encourage all of you to look into Oscar Micheaux and the history of "race films," films created outside of the Hollywood studio system by and for black Americans.

Don't buy into the false narrative that the only black representation in historical film was minstrelsy and Griffith-style garbage.

#em talks #history #film history #black history #i hope it's like ok for me to make this post as a white lady i'm just very passionate ab film history #and within our gates is an incredible film that deserves so much more noteriety than it has #i feel like people try to act like The Past was uniformly racist and that's just how things were #when the reality is that just like today people fought for their rights and made art and debated different philosophies of liberation #oh also the film can be very disturbing like many many trigger warnings for various forms of violence and assault #but that's part of what makes it so meaningful the fact that it does not shy away from reality yknow #and for 1920... god it's just so so good

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chronicowboy · 11 months

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rewatched the will scene for editing purposes and nothing i'm about to say hasn't been said before its just like I Know its an insane scene, i know that every second of every day, but you forget just how truuuuly insane it is until you watch it again.

eddie's vacant stare right at the start as he's rehearsing what could potentially be one of the biggest most important speeches of his life, the way he literally blinks himself out of his daze when buck enters with his faux-casual oooookay, there's something about buck's little smile when he says then we can get out of here that makes me want to BITE things, the absolute steel on eddie's face as he gets buck to sit down realising what it is he's about to do, buck's cautious everything alright? because he's not sure he can handle any other bad news after Everything, buck sitting down as far away from eddie and his terrifyingly serious energy as he physically can, the way eddie can't look at him and buck can't look away at first, eddie literally can't look at him like i cannot express to you how actively eddie avoids buck's eyes on him its a fucking love confession and he can't let buck read that on him so he hides in plain fucking sight.

the way buck tries to run from the reminder of eddie's mortality, eddie's soft but firm let me finish because if he doesn't say it now he'll have to wait until the next near death experience to find his courage again, the beat of wildly intentional eye contact in which buck's face says please whatever this is don't make me face it now and eddie's face says trust me please trust me the way i have trusted you with my heart, eddie's bitter chuckle about the well, buck desperately clinging to the fact that eddie survived that and wondering if he knows buck screamed for him then too, eddie's huffed laughter wondering if buck knows he saved him both times, how fully eddie sinks into the memory of realising he needed to give christopher a just in case, the framing of the shots capturing buck's reactions always featuring an out of focus eddie, the choice to focus so closely on buck's reactions even when eddie is speaking, the way its really only the both of them in focus when their eyes meet, the way eddie goes quiet when talking about the what ifs, eddie staring at buck as he talks about christopher being taken care of but looking away as he says by you because absolutely everything is written plain as day on his face for buck to read.

and then the switch, the way buck can't look at eddie and eddie can't look away, he needs to make sure buck understands, but buck can't face up to it, ITS IN MY WILL IF I DIE YOU BECOME CHRISTOPHER'S LEGAL GUARDIAN, buck going through the five stages of grief in a single second before landing on bargaining and reminding eddie of his family because he's the guy who lost christopher in a tsunami and broke down when chris needed him to be strong, my attorney said you could refuse/but you know i wouldn't/i know you wouldn't, buck's panic on his face even as he says it because of course he'd do it but that would mean eddie was gone, eddie's gentle and fond smile because even terrified buck is confirming everything he already knew, buck's pain when he says other family like he's still not entirely sure he's a part of the diaz family but the subconscious other because deep down buck knows where he belongs, eddie's casual reaction to buck's wouldn't they fight for him? because he knows no one will EVER fight for my son as hard as you, that is what i want for him, the little chuckle and the blatant shock on buck's face.

buck going through the five stages of grief again landing on a little anger this time with why are you just telling me now which means i might have had to do this with no warning still reeling in my grief for you, BECAUSE EVAN, the way buck's snaps to attention, eddie's disgust - not at buck but at the way buck's brain treats him, you came in here the other day and said it would have been better if you were the one who got shot, buck frozen and unable to look away from eddie's grief, you act like you're expendable, the way they both look away, eddie's big deep breath, but you're wrong, and the way they turn to each other in unison not a single millisecond separating them as they seek out each other's eyes and share a look that says: this is a love confession, i cannot say in what way, i cannot even comprehend that myself, but this is as close as i can get to showing you what you mean to me//this is a love confession, i do not know what it means, i cannot begin to understand, but this is as close as i can get to what you feel for me.

#sami rambles #i just. god. i shouldn't be allowed to rewatch that scene it turns me into another creacher #it should have a fucking trigger warning on it or an age limit or something because that shit is enough to drive a grown man insane #911 show #911 fox #evan buckley #eddie diaz #buddie #buck x eddie #christopher diaz #911 meta

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paintpaintpaintman · 23 days

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Art CW// body horror/gore

Art below the cut!

"I'll hold onto yours if you hold onto mine. Protect it for me, okay?"

I got some thoughts. So

The hearts of the heretics are the little trophies you get for killing them, but they continue to exist as followers without them. And Ratoo has lived without Hathor for a long time before it gets returned to him.

So assuming you are some godlike entity at some point, or you have your heart possessed by a demon, they kind of exist as an intimately personal item, but overall freely to be taken, given, etc.

Ratoo being edgy did a lot of damage to me I dunno-

I'm a bit ill for them teehee won't stop drawing them

But I do have a Leshycat sitting on the back burner. I wanted to finish this first. I put my whole ass into it

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blood-orange-juice · 5 months

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You are all going to block me but I just realised that I do low-key ship Aether/Lumine.

Hear me out.

It's the plot of so many myths. The best known is, of course, Izanami and Izanagi's story (the whole reason why siblingcest is so popular in Japan. same level of cultural importance as the madonna/whore complex for Christians), but there are also Fu Xi and Nuwa, Sun and Moon gods of the Inuit mythology, a bunch of Greek gods, a bunch of Egyptian gods too iirc.

Old cultures that had god-kings (some dynasties in Egypt and, as we discovered recently, Ancient Ireland) considered marriages between siblings a norm for them specifically and something to be frowned upon or at least unusual for everyone else.

You can't convince me the twins were not god-rulers in some faraway world (they also found it so boring that they don't do it anymore. actually, I'll stand by this headcanon even without shipping them).

Celestial beings that already are one and the same in some sense. Twin stars.

The symbolism just does something to me.

I wish I could say this is not about boring human sex (they are interstellar eldritch beings anyway. merge your photons my funky little sibcons, as Ray says) but nope, I think their interactions can easily take the form of boring human sex too.

(it's just not the main thing they have going on)

I'll show myself out.

P.S. there's also a bonus: all Traveler ships are now threesomes

#my chilumi headcanon now officialy has every single trigger warning under the sun #also I have no moral right to criticize people who ship skirk/childe now #I'm worse #tw: twincest #how do I tag it properly so that people can filter?#every day we stray further from celestia #I'll just tag this ship as dioskouroi from now on #dioskouroi #not that I plan to write a lot about it #*aethers your lumine*#I'm in my problematic ships era #it's funny but any kind of incest is usually my hugest squeak #I'll nope out of it with the speed of light #but I guess it's different with twin gods #look. at least there's no age gap #aelumi #travelercest

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crunchywarrior · 9 months

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*at a zoo* Thalia: What are they in for? Reyna: Thalia, this isn't prison. Thalia: So they can leave? Reyna: No, but- Thalia, pointing at a meerkat: I bet that one murdered someone.

#rick riordan #percy jackson and the greek gods #heroes of olympus #trigger warning zoos #trials of apollo #pjo hoo toa #thalia grace #reyna avila ramirez arellano #theyna #hunters of artemis

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lottieurl · 2 months

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why isnt everyone watching clique

#do um. check trigger warnings before you do but oh m my god????????#clique

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hyperfixated-homo · 6 months

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screaming

#rottmnt #tmnt #leonardo #rottmnt leo #god i want to. how does one trigger warning this #tw blood #tw implied blood #tw suicide #tw implied suicide #tw horror #tw face horror #didnt know THAT was a thing #anyways. i WOULD draw this literally the day after the spooky season ends wouldn't i #shadow draws #art

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vbecker10 · 6 days

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Loki's Silent Sentry (alt. ending Part 2 - final)

Part 1

Alt. ending Part 1 is meant to be read after part 2, instead of the original parts 3 - 7

**Seriously please do not read this without reading the trigger warnings**

TW: death of a main character (if you message me I will tell you who in case that will change if you read this or not), mourning the loss of a loved one, loss of a family member, having to mourn in secret, depression, feeling alone, brief mentions of previous loss of parents, inability to move on, guilt

(Please let me know if I missed anything and I will add it)

A/N: I wrote the fluffy, happy ending for this story but I got this song (tagged below) stuck in my head and it felt like a really tragic way to end this story. The idea just kept getting more depressing and heartbreaking so I had to write it. I understand this is not for everyone, it's not even something I would usually read.

Please, please do not feel the need to read this because we are mutuals or because you read the happy ending version. I will absolutely not be offended if you skip it.

...Last chance to turn back lol 🫣

You walk through the common room of the soldier's quarters, your head down as you desperately try to escape to your room. Several people congratulate you on receiving your award this morning and you nod vaguely to each as you pass by.

Slamming closed the door to your room, you rest your back against the wood and close your eyes as you breathe deeply. Your fists clench as your mind replays the king's words of praise. Heroic, brave, loyal, dutiful, all the things a good soldier should be you were but you were still not enough to save the one person on Asgard who mattered to you.

You reach for your chest and your fingers brush against the cold medal Odin pinned to you. Opening your eyes, you rip the medal from your uniform and throw it across your room. You pay no attention to where it lands, you want it as far from you as possible.

You pull the end of the black fabric tied around your arm and let it fall to the floor as you walk to your bed and sit down heavily. You bend down to pry off your heavy boots and when you sit up your eyes catch the painting of your parents that you keep next to your bedside.

Picking up the small frame, your fingers trace their faces slowly. Your father has been gone for nearly ten years, his life given defending the Bifrost from a Jotun attack. Your mother was killed while protecting the queen's father when you were still a child. You hold the picture tightly to your chest. Your mother and father, your grandfathers, three of your aunts, your uncle, your cousins... you slowly list the members of your family who gave their lives in service to the crown and the realm.

You slowly lower the picture to your bed as the thoughts that haunted you before you met Loki returned. You are once again completely alone in this world. No family, no true friends, no one to love and to love you in return. Loki was the only person you were able to connect with in recent years and he knew you were terrified of being alone, of being the last one left. He promised he would always be with you, that he would never leave you alone but you made him break that promise when you failed to save him.

You get up from the bed and walk angrily across the room. You swipe everything off the top of your dresser as you scream. Glass bottles shatter and items slam to the ground around you. You are not a hero, you are not brave, you did not do your duty. You move to your small bookshelf and grab the books by the handful, throwing them to the floor, crying tears of anger and regret and guilt and pain. You should have died protecting Loki, you should have died in his place. He should be alive, your mind screams as you pick up a small metal box you keep on your desk and throw it against a wall.

You stop suddenly as dozens of folded notes spill out of the broken box, walking towards the pile slowly you wipe away your tears with the back of you hand. You sit on the ground next to the pile and pick up one of the pieces of paper which fell out. The one you picked is still neatly folded, not like the others you've opened and refolded after having read them over and over. This is the note Loki passed to you shortly before his death, you have not been able to force yourself to read it. You hold it tightly to your chest and try to hear his voice but all you can hear is your own.

You lost the love of your life and you will be alone forever. Loki is gone and it is your fault.

You stand next to Captain Skye as Commandant Thorn prepares to read the charges for Loki's former sentry. Odin sits on his throne and Thor is seated next to him, the queen is not in attendance this afternoon. Only selected council members are present and a handful of soldiers, all captain or higher except for you.

The private kneels in the center of the room, a guard from the dungeons on either side of him. His hands are bound behind his back and he hangs his head low.

You force yourself not to look at him, to keep your eyes straight ahead and your expression emotionless. Last night you visited him in the dungeon and agreed to speak on his behalf even though you know it will have no effect on the outcome. Your captain informed you that he is going to be made an example of. Regardless of his low rank and lack of experience, his one duty above all else, was to keep Loki safe and he failed to do so.

You feel a pit grow in your stomach as a member of the council motions for you to come forward. Your heart pounds as you take your place next to him, he looks up at you and you can see how lost he is. A part of you wishes you could place the blame solely on him for Loki's death. If he had done his duty, Loki would be alive but you can't. You know in your heart that he had been purposefully selected because of Loki's desire to see you.

You take a breath to steady yourself. "It is my professional opinion as a lieutenant in the royal guard that Private Rok is far too young and inexperienced to have been allowed to guard Prince Loki. There is no doubt or argument that he did not follow his training or his duty but he is only one month out of the academy. There is a reason sentries are meant to spend their first year after training shadowing more senior sentries. It is so they can understand the enormous responsibility that comes with being a sentry. Guarding a royal or council member is more than silently following them around the palace. A sentry must truly be willing to lay their life down for the person they are protecting and unfortunately Private Rok was not willing or ready to do so," you look at Odin as you speak.

Odin sits back in his throne and asks, "Who is responsible for assigning this soldier to Prince Loki so soon after completing his training?"

The room is silent until you realize he is asking you. "Prince Loki requested him," you answer but give no further explanation. The last thing you want to do is make it seem as if you are attempting to say Loki's death was his own fault.

Odin nods and is quiet for a moment, the whole room waits for him to speak again. He motions for you to return to your place next to Captain Skye then he stands. You hold your breath as he sentences the young man to fifty years in the dungeons.

Two days later, you open your eyes to the sound of the morning bells. Loki's funeral is at sunset, you remind yourself as you sit up. You throw off your sheets but you can't find the strength to stand, you've cried it all out. Sitting motionless, you look around your room and sigh as you flex your bandaged hand. You had cleaned everything yesterday and cut yourself more than once on broken pieces of glass. The black tie and medal you "earned" sit next to the painting of your parents, waiting for you to put them back on.

Forcing yourself up, you take a few steps from the bed and go still when someone knocks on your door. You have no idea who it could be, the soldiers you live with have all giving you their condolences for the prince and congratulations on your award. There was no one left who would wish to see you.

You shake your head and decide to ignore whoever it is in the hopes that they will go away, you do not have the mental capacity for small talk today.

After a few moments there is another knock and you suddenly realize how quiet it is. The drone of constant talking and laughing that radiates from the common room is gone. Even at night, there is always chatter as the shifts vary greatly, someone is always awake.

You take a deep breath to steady your nerves and open the door. Your heart stops as you come face to face with the queen. You are so shocked you freeze, forgetting to bow or greet her or even blink it seems.

Her new sentry stands just to the side of her and says, "The queen would like to speak with you, Lieutenant Y/L/N."

Your heart aches at the thought of inviting the queen inside your private space, Loki had never been to your room before. There was never a chance for you to show him the book where you pressed the flowers he gave you or sleep with him on your bed so your sheets smelled like him. He hadn't seen the painting of your parents or your childhood stuffed animal. There were so many things you still wanted to share with him but you would never be able to now.

You shake away your thoughts and step out of the way so she can enter, her sentry remains outside. Closing the door behind her, you keep your eyes down and take a few steps away from her. You are terrified to be near her, afraid she blames you for Loki's death as much as you blame yourself.

"Y/N," she says softly and you look up slowly to meet her eyes.

She looks as distraught as you feel and without thinking, you begin to apologize, "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry-."

She moves quickly and wraps you in a tight hug, cutting off your words. You break down as soon as you are in her arms, she is the first person who has hugged you since Loki passed. Unable to hold back your tears any longer, you cling to Loki's mother while you shake from the force of your sobs.

When you finally let go of her, you wipe your eyes and apologize again, "I'm sorry your highness, I-"

"Shh," she pulls you back into her arms. "You have done nothing to be sorry for," she says quietly and you nod but you don't believe her. She takes your hand and leads you back to your bed, sitting on the edge she motions for you to join her.

"This was not your fault, Y/N," she tells you as you sit close to her.

"I know but..." you want to believe her.

"I don't blame you and you know Loki doesn't either," she says and you look up at her.

"I just... I need you to know I really tried. I tried so hard but I just... I couldn't get to him fast enough. I couldn't find him. I wanted to, I needed to save him but I couldn't," you try to wipe your eyes but the tears come to quickly. "I know my duty was to protect you and everyone calls me a hero because I did but..." the thought that haunted you at night slips free. "I didn't save your son, how could I be a hero? He died because I failed."

She pulls you into her arms and rubs your back lightly. "The outcome does not make you a hero, your actions do. I have never doubted that you did everything you could to bring my son back to us," she says softly. You nod and she adds, "He would never want you to let this eat away at your beautiful spirit."

You look up at her and rub your face with the back of your hand. "I know how much Loki loved you and how happy you made each other," she says, her eyes full of tears but she smiles. "He told me so many wonderful things about you and his hopes for your future together. You truly were his whole world."

"And he was mine," you tell her, your heart aching at the knowledge that he told his mother he was planning a life with you.

You take her hand, "Loki, told me how lucky he felt to have you as his mother. He said you were always there for him." She smiles as tears roll down her cheeks. "I want you to know how much he and I appreciated all of your help after the ball. I never... I never thanked you for giving me that extra time with him on Sundays. I cherished every second we had together but I wish we had more time. I would give anything for just one more day with him."

"So would I," she agrees.

You sit together in silence for a moment then she says, "There is a reason I wanted to see you this morning." She wipes her eyes and clears her throat before giving you the best smile she can gather in the moment.

She reaches into a pocket on her black gown and takes out a small golden box with a snake etched into the top. "Loki would have wanted you to have this," she offers it to you.

You shake your head no, your heart sinking as you open the box. A thin gold band with diamonds around a large emerald sits on a dark green piece of velvet. You touch the ring slowly, running your fingers over each gem then you close the box quickly as you feel your head spinning.

You look up at her and she is holding a folded piece of parchment paper. She sighs deeply and looks at the paper without unfolding it, running her fingers along the crease, "He figured out how to bypass the marriage law..."

You look from Frigga to the box in your hands and find it hard to breathe as she talks. Your hands shake as you hold the box tighter.

"He was going to propose during the Harvest Festival next month..." she says. "He wanted to do it in front of all of Asgard so no one would ever question how in love you two were."

Your heart shatters at hearing how close you were to being Loki's. One more month and the two of you would have had your happily ever after. You open the box again slowly and take the ring out, you slip it halfway onto your finger and stop. You whisper no and you begin to take it off but Frigga puts her hand over yours.

"You should wear it," she says, "And you should be with his family tonight."

"I can't..." you look down. "I'm supposed to be on guard during the procession," you explain but she shakes her head.

"You will walk with us," she says simply. "It is what Loki would have wanted."

"But the king said I'm not to mourn him in public, it would be..." you worry about his reaction to seeing you at the funeral.

"Leave the king to me," she says in a determined voice. You can't help but smile a little when you remember Loki once telling you that Odin may rule Asgard but Frigga ruled Odin.

"You are not just a soldier. Odin and the council may try to deny it, but you were not just his sentry nor even his friend," she sighs deeply and takes your hand again. "You should have been allowed to be his wife, Y/N. It is what you both wanted and deserved. I'm sorry these idiotic political issues kept you two apart while he was alive but I refuse to let anything stand in the way of you grieving him the way you should."

You can barely believe what you are hearing and you are at a loss for words.

Loki's body is dressed in full armor with his horned crown, his favorite daggers crossed over his chest as he rests in a wooden boat, surrounded by flowers from the garden he shared with his mother. The king and queen walk a few steps behind as the boat slowly floats towards the water. Civilians, council members and soldiers line either side of the long path, heads hung in respect and mourning. You walk next to Thor, your black gown flowing around you gently in the light breeze, your hands folded tightly together so you can feel the ring he wanted to give you. Tears stream steadily down your cheeks but you hold your head high and continue on.

The dark water ahead grows closer and when you see the mist from the falls beyond, your feet refuse to walk any further causing you to stumble. A hand reaches out and catches before you fall.

"I have you," Thor assures you, tears in his eyes as you take his arm for support.

"Thank you Thor," you look away as he fails to hold back the first of many tears. "I'm sorry you lost your brother."

He nods quietly and walks with you a few more paces before he says, "I'm sorry sister. I had not known how much you meant to Loki, I never would have treated so you poorly if I knew the truth. I only ever wanted my little brother to find peace and happiness. It seems as if he had found both with you."

You grip his arm tighter as the boat gently slips into the water, guided forward by Odin's magic. Odin halts a few feet from the edge of the water but Frigga continues to follow the boat until the hem of her dress becomes wet from the soft waves. Thor leaves you so he can stand with his father but you follow the queen. You cannot bear the thought that this is as close to Loki as you will ever be again. You want to follow him out into the water and over the falls to his life after this world.

All of Asgard watches in silence as Loki's body floats across the water in the wooden boat. Odin taps his scepter once on the sandy shore and the sound echos, somewhere behind you a single archer let's loose a flaming arrow and your heart stops. The boat catches instantly and your knees give out as he draws closer to the edge of the great falls.

You hit the ground hard and watch from your knees, tears streaming down your cheeks as the boat vanishes from view. Loki's spirit is set free, hundreds of beautiful green orbs float towards the sky above. You watch until the last light fades into the stars and cover your face with your hands to quiet your pained scream.

A few days after Loki's funeral, you accepted the queen's request to return as her sentry. Over the last month, you have force yourself to rejoin the world around you but inside you feel as if you are still drowning in your grief.

Every second you stand alone in silence outside of the queen's office is spent reliving past conversations with Loki. Each hallway you walk down holds a memory from your time spent following him as his sentry. The winding staircases where he held your hand secretly or stole a kiss when no one was around cause your chest to ache. You can't breath inside the palace, the very air reminds you of him.

Today is Sunday, a day you used to look forward to above all others, a day where you were once able to show Loki your love for him and feel his love for you. The queen opens her door and steps out, there is no need for her to tell you where you are going. You already know the destination.

You follow Loki's mother into the garden and a wave of emotions hit you so hard you find it hard to breathe. Every Sunday since Loki passed, you have taken his place beside her although it pains you both greatly.

You walk next to her slowly as she recounts stories from her son's childhood and teen years. You can hear the heartache in her voice as she corrects herself each time she speaks about Loki as if he still here. The stories vary over time, some are funny while others are seemingly random memories with no true focal point.

You listen to each story but you are simply performing for the queen, you smile and laugh at all the right moments but you have lost your ability to feel joy. Your eyes scan the garden while she talks as if Loki might somehow appear on the path ahead. As if he could be hiding behind every tree or tall hedge even though you know you will never see him again. The garden has become one more place on Asgard where Loki haunts you.

As you leave the garden, you both pause next to a tall, full rose bush with flowers that are marbled green and white. She touches the petals gently and takes your hand.

You stand at the top of the stairs and think about the nightmare that awaits you if you return to your room. Your sleep has been stolen by a single reoccurring dream every night for the last month. Smoke and ash cloud your vision, you feel heat burning your skin as the flames surrounding you grow steadily closer. The roar of the fire drowns out your screams for Loki and you always wake up suddenly to the same sound, the cry Loki's mother let out when she found him in your arms.

"Loki would have loved these," you tell her with another practiced smile.

She conjured them in honor of Loki after she spoke to your on the morning of his funeral. She gives you a hug and tells you that your are dismissed for the night. You nod and turn, leaving her to watch the sunset alone.

My beautiful Y/N,

You had decided tonight would be different, you were not returning to your room. You turn down the long dark hallway to your left, to the office where Loki had created a duplicate of his chambers using his magic.

Lighting a single candle, you take off your armor slowly and sit on the worn out couch. The cushions are flat and the legs are uneven but you are not worried about being comfortable, not tonight. All you want is to be somewhere you used to share with Loki. His office and chambers had both been sealed upon his death but even if they were not, you doubt you could bring itself to go in either.

You close your eyes for a moment to stay yourself then take out the note he gave you just before his death. You take a deep breath and open it for the first time.

I miss you more than I can put into words, I cannot wait until I have you in my arms again. I promised you that I would find a way for you to be mine forever and I think I finally have. We will be together soon and I will never let you go. I love you more than anything in the nine realms.

Love always, Loki

You fold the note carefully and hold it to your chest as you lay down. The tears you have kept locked away all day run down your cheeks. Wiping the tears from your eyes, you catch a glimpse of the ring he would be giving you at the Harvest Festival tomorrow if he were still alive.

You close your eyes and imagine Loki down on one knee in front of all of Asgard professing his love for you. You cry with joy and jump into his waiting arms, telling him you love him as you kiss him over and over.

The images fade and you roll over to face the back of the couch. You sniffle, wiping your eyes again and decide you will soon be with Loki forever. Tomorrow, before the festival, you are going to tell the queen you are leaving Asgard. You have made the decision to be sent to the front line of the ever raging war on Jotunheim.

If the Gods are good, you will meet Loki and your family in Valhalla before long.

This is the song that inspired me, if you listen to the end you will see why. Again... I'm sorry to everyone who reads this that I hurt you but I just needed to get this story out of my head. If you want the happy ending version please read the original part 3 (linked at the top) 💙💙

If you did like this, please like, comment and share! Thanks! 💚💚

@siconetribal @soubi001 @lulubelle814 @newtomofgods @lokiswife-dark-fox-queen

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enhanced-operatives-division · 25 days

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Junicrane/Starstruck Ramble

I will not be brief, all under the cut

To clear some things right off the bat:

No corpse, no proof with Juniper. Obligatory this is set in a canon where he's alive and adjacent to the agency in some way.

Reggie & Juniper are just gay to me, but I don't mind any interpretation of their sexuality

The games are set in 1967/68 to me (based on a couple bits in game) which is before it was legal to be gay in America at least (1971), which is relevant to how I interpret canon as being somewhat grounded in reality, despite unrealistic elements.

This is just an insane amount of headcanons/elements of and AU all culminated into one post. I will talk about some headcanons like they're just facts because they are established in my head, and it saves me over explaining literally everything, however I will explain some parts a little bit for clarity.

Alright. Actual beginning of the ramble:

Juniper is a character to me who had gotten so lost in his job as an actor and a social presence that in the end his whole life revolved around that 'role'. Because of this, by the time he's put into the situation where he's around the Agency, he basically knows nothing about himself, though he doesn't realise at first. Furthermore, what little identity he had has changed in so many ways. He's no longer a beloved famous actor in the prominence of public light, he's legally dead and he tarnished his career just before he was supposed to die, with the bonus of that making him lose the majority of his estate. From that, he also has horrific facial scarring from the electrical burns from literally having his face fried. I believe a friend of mine made a post about this a while ago (I also think they were the first to think it up also), but, to me, Juniper has a permanent trimmer in his right arm (aka his dominant hand) from the electrical current and it is messing with his nervous system.

All in all, he's not doing great, but he's too proud to admit that he's not doing great, because if anything, what's left of his ego is all he has as a defense since he's deep in unfamiliar water.

Before ending up around the agency (I have multiple interpretations of this, so I'm just going to bring it up generally), he'd never actually seen Reggie, and his only impression of him is a single voicemail, which was his only reference he had to later impersonate him. Juniper probably has very little feelings other than the ones he projects onto him because of Phoenix and that, at the very least, he's physically attracted to Reggie to some degree (that's like the beginning of how everything else would tumble into place in this sort of interpretation at least).

And on Crane's side? His feelings towards Juniper are probably very intense and muddled. On the one hand, he adores musical theatre, and that's his now ex-favourite actor. The thought of just casually being around him blows the bit of fanboy in him away at first because THAT'S the GUY, plus the inklings of a celebrity crush which still poke at him. And then there's the rational side of him, which knows Juniper has committed absolute atrocities on the side of Zoraxis, and hates him for that. Then there's how much Juniper comes off as an asshole at first because he refuses to cooperate with anything the Agency tried to put in place. He finds Juniper endlessly frustrating, and yet he's stuck working with him since, afterall, he's the one who knows the Agency's history with Juniper the best. I imagine him acting a lot like how he does IEYTD 1 around Juniper.

At this point, I'm just describing the pitch for a romcom.

I think the start of their relationship with one another largely started with Juniper trying to wind Crane up. It was a way of getting his attention, and I don't think Juniper knows why he's so dead set on that at first, because I don't think he realises he has a crush on 'this grump' at first. (I think that's actually the fun part about these two, because it's almost like a role reversal of the celebrity crush dynamic. This ex-big name actor has a TERRIBLE crush on an average joe and it is KILLING HIM.) But of course the Agency keeps them together because Juniper is at least conversing with Crane, so it's a start.

Through one way or another, they actually get talking casually, at least mildly at first. It takes Juniper a long time to fully deconstruct the wall he's built, and the thing is, Crane isn't the one trying to deconstruct it, at least at first, because yeah, Juniper realises if he wants Reggie to actually like him in any way, he can't keep winding him up. So they talk. Small talk at first, something rhythmic and almost easy to keep to a script. And over time that turns into actual conversations. Genuine ones in which Reggie rips out the occasional one of his jokes which Juniper is endlessly endeared about. The way he smiles just before he makes them, like he wants to chuckle at what he's about to say before he says it. That's probably when Juniper realised that he does have some vague crush on him, and that it wasn't going away.

This is what kickstarts John I can't-buy-you-things-to-impress-you-so-acts-of-service-it-is Juniper to do little things for him. It mostly starts off as him trying to make Reggie his tea how he likes it. However, the nerve damage in his arm makes that hard, as the weight of the kettle and trying to pour is hard all of a sudden. And he refuses to accept that, so he tries for a very long while. Long enough that Crane would go to investigate what was going on. And when he does see Juniper leaning over a cup with the kettle as he uneasily tries to pour it, and when Crane asks Juniper responds so matter-of-fact that his intention is nothing but genuine. And it catches Reggie off guard because Juniper hadn't done anything like that up to that point, and his very apparent vulnerability is so clearly on show.

It shifts something between them.

From that point on, conversations are longer, more familiar. Both of their attitudes soften, and Reggie makes more jokes. Juniper learns how to better use his left hand while strengthening his right back to a point where it could be used again. Slowly, they're both spending time with one another not because they have to, but just because they can. Little bits at first, not too far outside what they already were doing, but those little bits turned into long bits to a point where the other person's company was genuinely desirable.

As time passes, Juniper probably realises that he doesn't genuinely know much about himself or what hobbies he's into, because he never really had the time when he got big, and his home life in his youth wasn't bad, but it wasn't picturesque. I think Reggie would pick up on it, and absolutely try to introduce him to some things he's into. Some things stick, other things don't (corn husking very much stays Reggie's passion, and John will go with him sometimes because it's him, but it's not something he strongly cares for). Crane introduces him to a lot of music, and it's something that becomes a staple between them, with tracks they listen to more than others (tragically, I know relatively little about 60s music so I couldn't really say what). Occasionally they dance, never anything intense, think slow dancing, but the closeness is nice.

Through all of it, Juniper is battling the worst crush of his life, and he can't stand it, because I think he struggles to read people since he doesn't have anything like a script or a director to refer back to, so he has no idea if Reggie likes him back or if he's just desperate for that to be true. I think because of that any sort of confession between them would be incredibly raw, not only because of the time they live in making it hard for them to be truthful about how they love, but because it's a complete show of Juniper who's worked to be this better person. I don't exactly know how that would go, mainly because I don't have one set version of their dynamic, this post is just a generalisation of main consistent points.

Reggie does like him back, because he's gotten used to Juniper being just this guy, not a figure in the public eye, not a Zoraxis lackey, and not any sort of Agency operative (despite being under their care to some degree). He's someone he genuinely cares for, because they've given one another the time of day to learn one another, and I think because Reggie was a field agent, he was a lot better at reading Juniper than Juniper was at reading him. Eventually Juniper's company becomes something he could see around him for the rest of his life, and I think he accepts that he likes Juniper a lot more gracefully.

I think any affection directed at Juniper would at first be met with him feeling a little muddled. Reggie was a very physically affectionate person when he could be, and sure the initial flirting with one another came with the occasional little touches, but everything now was so deeply intentional. I also don't think Juniper would almost ever get over the novelty of being able to kiss him, or many other gestures, because it made the fact that they were together so very real, and it was great. I do think it comes easier to Reggie, and it's a big way of showing how much he cares, so it's important for Juniper to try and show it back because he knows how much it means to the other.

I like the idea of them eventually living with one another, too. I think Juniper would have always had a quiet little daydream of sorts where he does just live a domestic quiet life, and he can with Reggie (well, as close as they can get between the Agency and Zoraxis always being at odds), and he loves that, and he loves him, and it's immense.

I think they cook for one another a lot, it helps Juniper work on his dexterity in a controlled environment, which means a lot because it's a huge point of insecurity (that and his scars). He does improve, and Crane is proud of that and shows it and it's great. I also think they'd probably cook together too, because they can deal with being in the kitchen together and they work well with one another. It's probably a good way for them to unwind because over time they can do it in relative silence.

As I said before, I also think music is a staple in their household, and that Reggie listens to things on vinyl almost all of the time because he likes the background noise. Sometimes Juniper will catch him chuntering along to the music which he finds endlessly endearing. I wouldn't put it past his dramatic ass to also join in to fluster Reggie, but I also don't think Reggie would mind that terribly because Juniper has listened to the music enough to know the lyrics, and that's huge to him.

I don't think they are without rough patches, no relationship is, but I think the good part about them is that they're willing to talk about it (... eventually). They're used to long conversations, and while they're often less fun conversations, they're needed and they know that, and it works out.

Alright. I think I'm done for now. I haven't mentioned everything, but this definitely got the worst of it out of my system. If you ever want to hear any specific thoughts my ask box is open but other than that, behold my general dynamic for these two which has been festering in my head for years. I think they're great

#ty right-agent for explicitly telling me that this would be welcomed you a real one #i had a massive babble to my friend abt what if they all feed me to the hounds for speaking #and he said “girl that fandom is like 12 people big they need you to speak” and yeah that also helped #i have a hard time talking if I'm not asked/prompted to that's why i adding tags is great for me. that and i like the format #anyways.#THESE TWO.............dear lord can you tell I have been unwell abt them forever..#this is propeganda (/j) for them. btw. please you have to understand the potential here. it's so good.#it's slowburn <- my (probably) demiromantic ass cannot handle romance without a build up and this set up is perfect (it will never happen)#also i find it easier to write ANYTHING between these two from Juniper's perspective because i find it easier to get into his head #idk reggie is like the gay version of the: what is he thinking of? i could take a bear in a fight. audio ive heard.#whereas with juniper i have him trapped under a microscope #im going to tag this now so i can use the remaining tags to RANT #ieytd #john juniper #reginald crane #junicrane #starstruck #i expect you to die #<- being BRAVE!!!#when I get really excited i start getting like this internal shaking feeling and uh. yeah this rant started that #the worst part abt that is it also triggers my tourettes so like. double whammy. excited about blorbos? jail :(#but. yeah I uh. yeah. sorry this IS so long..I did warn but . AUGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAHHHHHHHHHAUUUUUUAHHHHHHHHHHHHH #also i did this rant in 2 parts. last night and this morning so yeah uh. yeah.#god im so messed up about these two #make me a boat by the family crest came on while wroting this and while it's mainly a roxanix song to me......AUUUUUG.....#i struggle to find music for these sillies because they have such a specific vibe to me amd I've not quite managed to find something which -#- genuinely feels correct for them and it drives me up the WALL #GOD NIGHT SHIFT JUST CAME OF SHUFFL.....all my ieytd songs are coming out to drive me up the wall.......#FINISHED I've been adding tags as I've gone alonga #thank you for reading hope you enoyed and if you didn't im sorry

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