I thought the original sketch was kinda cool so I digitized and coloured it and it was a horrible decision. I did not plan to spend 15 more hours on it. I sincerely apologize to @lekopoofball, who has crushing amounts of work to get done as soon as possible.
Waiting for This Story to End Before I Begin Another, Jan Heller Levi//Fourth of July, Sufjan Stevens//"The Leaving Season", Some Are Always Hungry, Jihyun Yun//Never Love an Anchor, The Crane Wives//Michael Cunningham
not a dumb question at all, but no, but whether or not u felt guilt/remorse in that situation is irrelevant because the more important part is that thats just an uhealthy and disordered way to internally conceptualize and externally act when uve done something wrong in general and so ur problem is much farther back
feeling physically sick/physical pain when uve made a mistake is often an abuse response rooted in an inability to emotionally handle distress. it's not healthy and is what leads to the negative maladaptive coping mechanisms that are ignoring it and redirecting blame
internally, whats often happening is ur brain is struggling to cope with mistakes because within abusive logic, mistakes make u a horrible evil awful person who deserves to be abused and ur mistakes will be used against u to hurt u. this is wrong, but since its how ppl under abuse were/are being treated, our brains immediately go into panic mode when we make a mistake, and try to cope with that in destructive and disordered ways because it doesnt know how to do anything else. it ignores, never admits fault, redirects blame, ect. all in order to try and avoid the abuse and emotional distress that comes with "being wrong"
so ur actually not capable of feeling healthy guilt or remourse in those situations but that distinction is irrelevent and it doesnt matter one way or the other even if u were, because the actual problem is the entire situation itself and u need to break it down from the very beginning