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thedevilsoftruth · 1 month

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Hey!, I just finished rewatching moon knight and now scrolling through the moon knight tags when I came across a post about how Mr knight is actually Marc Spector and Steven Grant is a playboy billionaire in the comics and I was shook. Then I came across your post of you ranting about the differences from the show to the comics, which blew my mind!, and now I’m so intrigued and curious about the true lore of moon knight, every time I try to search about it on google I just get references from the shows (so frustrating) I can’t afford to buy the comics, so if you can/want could you please tell me all the important and interesting facts/lore that’s in the moon knight comics?

Sorry for the long message, just came across your page and pressed follow, love your content!. ❤️

AAAAAAGGGGHHHH HOLY SHIT. HOLY SHIT. GIIGLING AND KICKING MY FEET IN THE AIR. HEY, LOOK MA, I MADE IT!! I GET TO EXPLAIN THE MOON KNIGHT COMICS LORE TO SOME GUY ON THE INTERNET!!

in all seriousness, this made my day. I'm so glad you enjoy my content, and I will happily explain to you the MK lore!

I completely get you on the not wanting to but the comics thing. Comics are expensive. Honey, imma be real with you, readcomiconline.li is where it's at. It's where I read all of the comics I didn't have.

So before I go on a tangent and explain things, and this goes for anyone wanting to start reading the comics, heres a little list of all the comics I've read so far in what I understand to be chronological order.

It's a little bit cheesy and a VERY long run, but Marc Spector: Moon Knight from 1989-94 is maaayybbeee where you want to start off, but maybe not. I didn't start off with this run, but even as bad as the old comics are, they're a bit important.

But, I HIGHLY suggest you start out with the Lemire and Smallwood run from 2016. It was the first run I completed, and it's an amazing run and VERY important to read. Many people say it's the best run. It's certainly a run, I'll tell you that. ( Also I didn't read that one online, I received it last year as a Christmas gift. Also readcomic doesn't have all of the issues, so be warned on that. )

Next I read From The Dead. And I moved on to Vengeance of The Moon Knight from 2009. And after I'd suggest reading Age of Khonshu, Devils Reign and then The Midnight Mission. You can read all of these for free on readcomiconline.li ( don't type in comics plural because it will direct you to the wrong site ) be warned though because there are a lot of ads and you will get jumpscared by anime boobies.

Now moving onto what you asked me for. The important stuff, right.

I'm new to this whole comic reading stuff as well, and for anyone else reading this who knows more than I do, please add additional information I missed down in the reply section. It would mean a lot. So now I'm going to give a you a quick run down on Marc's origin story. ( And for a quick disclaimer, I will come off as not taking myself seriously in some parts of this post because I don't take myself seriously lol. )

Marc Spector was born on March 9th, 1987 in Chicago Illinois into a Jewish family. His father was Elias Spector and his mother was Wendy Spector ( his younger brother being Randall Spector )Elias was a rabbi who manged to escape Nazi prosecution during the days of Hitler and all that jazz. Because Elias was a rabbi, Randall would get picked on at school a lot, and Marc would be there to stand up for him. Even at a young age Marc was exposed to a lot of violence. That could come from growing up yk... Kinda poor and having to stand up for your lil bro.

Marc's violent nature was really born when a close family friend of his, Yitz Perlmen was discovered to be a secret serial killer who targeted Jews. From what I understand, Perlmen tried to Kill Marc ( mind you Marc was like 11 or 12 ) but Marc had escaped but his traumatic experiences led him to form D.I.D

As seen in the Lemire run, the first time Marc had encountered Khonshu was when he was 12 and was getting diagnosed for his D.I.D Marc wasn't told to his face from the doctor about his disorder and was told to step outside the office. Marc tried to evesdrop on the conversation, and from outside of the doctor's office, he meets Khonshu. Khonshu tells him, " That man in there is not your true father. I am. " Mind you, Marc is 12!!! 12!!!! Khonshu began manipulating Marc since he was twelve because he was, obviously really fucking young, and traumatized. Khonshus tactics were to strip Marc away from his religion and culture and make him submit to him.

So anyways, Marc was sent to Putnam Psychiatric Hospital and would stay there until he was 18 when his father funeral came along and he was let go for a week to go visit his family. This is where we learn Marc's relationship with his father was complex. Marc tells his mother, Wendy, that his father must have been happy to send him away because he was embarrassed by him. Wendy and Marc have an argument, which ends in Marc saying he's going to the bathroom, when he actually leaves to his childhood bedroom and escapes out the window when he hears Khonshus voice.

Marc later enlisted into the U.S marines Corps and served as a private for a couple years. But on Marc's second tour to Iraq, superiors started to report his odd behavior and they found out that Marc had lied about his disorder, leaving him to be discharged. Marc joined the CIA and served with his brother Randall. Randall was jealous of Marcs talents and killed Marc's girlfriend, Lisa, because she was going to expose a gun scheme. Marc then like... Threw bombs at Randall and shit and then assumed he was dead...but he wasn't.

Marc left the CIA after that and started doing illegal boxing, where he met his soon to be best friend, Jean-Paul Duchamp ( usually refered to as Frenchie ) and they became mercenaries together and started killing a bunch of people, in Marc's case, for mooonnneeyyy!!! Get that bag, girlie. And then Marc got put on trial for war crimes!! His crime being yk...assistanting the president of this south African country called Bosqueverde as one does.

And then he started to do missions under this group call the Karnak Cowboys and fell in love with one of his groupmates, Layla El-faouly, as seen in later issues of The Midnight Mission. Then she fucking died when an escape went wrong.

So anyways Marc meets this funny lil guy named Raoul Bushman ( he is not funny lil guy, he's killed hundred of people, probably) So Marc works for him with Frenchie and they, together, set to north Sudan to raid a dig site. ( This should start to sound familiar, as it was briefly touched on in the show when Arthur's guys captured Steven and put cuffs on him and slammed him in the back of their car ) Looks like raid shadow legends went down again, and things started to get not so epic when Raoul killed the lead Archeologist of the dig site, Peter Alraune in front of his daughter Marlene. This pissed the ever loving shit out of Marc because even though Marc likes violence, he doesn't enjoy violence against innocent people, and so he punches the fucker but uh oh! The Raoul Bushman Strikes Back, and he fucking KILLS MARC IN RETURN AND EVERYONE ELSE EXPECT FOR FRENCHIE AND MARLENE AND THIS ONE MF WHO TOLD HIM HE WOULD TELL HIM WHERE THE DIG SITE WAS. ( really Raoul left Marc mortally wounded, but he was on the brick of death, basically)

Marc was able to regain conscious and drag himself halfway to Khonshus tomb ( which is what Raoul was looking for ) Marlene and a bunch of other citizens find Marc and they carry him to Khonshus tomb. Marc hears Khonshus voice for yet another time, and Marc is revived and becomes the Moon Knight we all know and love. Then he basically killed Raoul's guys and then fell in love with Marlene.

So that's his origin story. Now onto the stuff I know as fact but it won't be explained in chronological order because I haven't read a ton of comics to explain it in chronological order.

He used Steven as a a way to handle money and build wealth so they could have recourses like vehicles, weapons and a ton of other random bullshit ( go!! ) that they don't need. Jake was used as a new York taxi driver so that he had his eye in the streets and knew when shit was goin down. They're both kind of horny. Jake literally spends some of his free time in a strip clubs drinking rum. ( As seen in the midnight mission and implied on in the Lemire run. )

His relationship with Marlene was long, but didn't last because, if I'm recalling correctly, Marc had a mental breakdown and decided to basically stop working for Khonshu so he could be with Marlene. But soon after he started hearing Khonshus voice again and Marlene couldn't take anymore of it, so she left him.

And then there's that bullshit with The Midnight Man. All I know is that he passed away from cancer and had a son named Jeff Wilde. Jeff aspired to Marc and wanted to be his sidekick, kind of like Robin and Batman in the Lego Batman movie with a little less adoption, but Marc kept on refusing as a way to protect Jeff. The Jeff had this whole thing where he turned evil or some shit idk and I guess Marc killed him? I'm not sure. Please, moon knight gang, let me know what happened in the reply section because I'm ignorant.

Marc had his independence from Khonshu after banishing Khonshu to Asgardian Prison ( seen in Age of Khonshu and discussed in The Midnight Mission) and decided " fuck you, I don't need need you anymore. Imma do my own thing and you can't do nothing about it " and then he became Mr. Knight. Mr. Knight is kind of a detective and he consults with policemen ( as seen in From The Dead ) Moon Knight is the one who does all the fighting.

From where Marc's development is at right now, Marc was running a thing called the Midnight Mission, which was a place where citizens would go to to report strange things happening in the city.

Additional, fun information:

Marc has a daughter named Diatrice. He only knows about it because Jake had a secret relationship with Marlene on the side after Marc and Marlene broke up.

He sleeps all day in the tomb of Khonshu and fights crime at night. He's like a bat!!

His ringtone ( as seen in the midnight mission) is The Killing Moon by Echo and The Bunnymen. ( Y'all should listen to it, if you haven't. it's really good. ).

He drives a red convertible car ( as seen in the Brain Micheal Bendis run, don't read it it's REALLY bad and insufficient. ) and also a motorcycle ( as see in Vengeance of The Moon Knight)

He was originally supposed to fight mainly just werewolf's and um... Writers at Marvel had different ideas.

His favorite drink is an ice cold vodka ( as seen in the Midnight Mission)

He had a mansion and then his money went bye bye and now he lives in a haunted house ( as seen, once again, in the Midnight Mission)

Frenchie is also gay! Hes married to a man named Rob! ( And this is only from what I've heard, by he apparently had a secret crush on Marc at some point.)

And yeah. That's all I have for ya today. Thank you if you made it this far, and I hope I was able to satisfy your curiosity a little bit!

Goodknight everyone!!!

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reasonsmandy · 1 year

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Unfinished Melody

Eddie Roundtree x Fem! Reader

✧.* requested by anon — prompt 38 with eddie roundtree 🥰

✧.* summary — The secrets that the walls of Eddie's Chicago hotel room held have lived in your memories since that morning, the words you two uttered without thinking still reverberate in each other. And maybe that's why after so many years none of you have even touched on the subject, but years later a reunion would bring all of that to light.

✧.* warnings — none

✧.* word count — 3.6k

✧.* 🎸 — Eddie's masterlist

✧.* mandy's notes — In case you'd like to be tagged in other djats stories of mine, the link to my tag list is at the end of the story. Good reading :)

Chicago Stadium

(July 12, 1979)

10h00

"Please tell me you're joking." Your hands were sweating and you tried to contain the tightness in your chest, looking him in the eyes was impossible.

"Do I look like I'm joking baby?" Eddie says running his hands through his hair. "You have to understand me..."

"I can't believe you sometimes Eddie." Your voice came out shaky, and when he noticed your downcast face, he felt a tightness in his chest. "You're just going to leave the band, our family, for what? Your own selfish ambition?"

Eddie let out a sigh. "It's not just about my ambition, Y/N and you know that. It's about Billy. I can't take his shit anymore. He thinks he's the star of the show and everyone else is just there to support him. That's not what we signed up for and you know that pretty girl, come on."

"But we've already achieved so much," You say, feeling the frustration rising on your chest. "We're on the verge of something great. And now you want to throw it all away because of Billy? You're being ridiculous!"

Eddie stood up, pacing around the room. "Ridiculous? You think I'm being ridiculous? You don't understand what it's like, Y/N. To always be in the background, to never get any recognition."

You don't let him continue, your face turns serious. "I've been every step of this journey with you, I don't know if you remember but I also stay in the background. If anyone knows what you're talking about, it's me. But you don't see me ranting to the wind about how Billy likes to be in the spotlight or how only Daisy is mentioned as the band's female icon. What we live here is something unique my love, can't you see that?"

Eddie's face softened at your words, but he still seemed resolute. "I'm sorry, gorgeous. I just can't do it anymore. I need to follow my own path, make my own mark on the world."

"And what about us?" you ask, your voice breaking slightly. "What about our dreams, our plans for the future? You're just going to delete me from the equation, is that it?"

Eddie hesitated, his eyes searching yours. "Come on honey, don't be like that."

"Answer my question." You felt your heart break.

"I don't know, Y/N! Damn it, I don't fucking know." He looked anxious, frustrated with everything that had happened in the last few days. "I need some time to figure things out."

You shake your head in disbelief. "You can't just leave everything behind, Eddie. The band, our family, our life together. You can't just walk away like it never mattered."

"I know it's not easy," Eddie says, his voice low. "But sometimes we have to make tough choices to get where we want to go. I hope you'll understand someday."

You feel tears welling up in your eyes, but you refuse to let them fall. "I don't think I'll ever understand this, Eddie. But I guess it doesn't matter. You've made up your mind."

Eddie moves towards you, his arms open, but you step back. "Don't," you say, your voice barely above a whisper. "Just...give me some space, okay? I need to process all of this."

Eddie nods, his eyes filled with regret. "I understand. I'm sorry, gorgeous. I never wanted to hurt you."

You turn to leave, your heart heavy with grief. "I know," you say, your voice barely audible. "But sometimes, even when we don't mean to, we hurt the ones we love."

You left Eddie's hotel room leaving your heart there, you've always been in love with him since you were a little girl when you lived in Pittsburgh. Parting with someone so important to you was like losing a part of your own body, and you knew that that emptiness in your chest would never leave you peace.

...

Since then

(1979-CURRENT)

Your hands brought the cold water that came out of the faucet towards your face for the third time, you tried to camouflage it but the nervousness grew in your chest like a weed in fertile soil. It had been two weeks since you had finished your interview with Julia Dunne, for the documentary she was organizing about "Daisy Jones and the six", and when you recorded your last take she invited you to a barbeque at Billy's house that would get the whole band together to talk about old times.

At first you were reluctant to accept the invitation, but after talking to Warren about it, he and Lisa convinced you to accept. As you gazed into the mirror, you took note of your changed appearance. Your hair was shorter now, and the creases around your eyes were more pronounced. But despite the passage of time, you still recognized the same Y/N staring back at you.

You couldn't help thinking about what it would be like to see everyone again after what happened in Chicago, Was it going to be as fun as things used to be at after-show parties? Would everything be more intimate like late nights making music in the house in Laurel Canyon? Or would you go back to that moment of comfort and calm that rehearsals in Chuck's garage provided?

As you arrived at Billy's house, you saw that the backyard had been transformed into a lively gathering. The scent of grilled burgers and hot dogs wafted through the air, mixed with the sounds of laughter and chatter.

As you approach the house, you can hear the sound of music drifting from the backyard, soon you recognize 'Regret Me'. Stepping through the sliding glass door, you see a lively scene unfolding before you. Daisy is in the midst of a spirited conversation with Julia, Warren and Lisa were sitting on a patio set, chatting animatedly with Graham, catching up on old times. In the distance, you could see their two young daughters playing tag with Daisy's daughter, their high-pitched giggles filling the air.

Your eyes disobey you or on the contrary, obey your hidden desires, and search the place for Eddie Roundtree and when you manege to see him walking towards you your heart skips a beat, nervousness filling your chest.

Roundtree approaches you awkwardly, reviewing the words he had rehearsed so many times in his head imagining this reunion. But before he can get to you, Warren arrives excitedly hugging you on impulse.

"Y/N!" He exclaims, excited to see you again. "We missed you so much, never disappear like that again!"

"I promise not!" You say hugging him back, you notice Eddie closer to you and turn to him. "Hey Roundtree, long time no see..."

"Yeah, how are you L/N?" Her name sounded so good in his voice, like it used to."You look gorgeous."

"Thank you." You feel a shiver in your belly, having his gaze on you was as powerful as ever. "You're not so bad yourself."

You all move to a table near the pool, Lisa was there when she sees you, she gets up to greet you with a warm hug. As Warren and you catch up, you immediately fall into a comfortable conversation. You talk about everything from your favorite music to your upcoming plans. It's clear to everyone watching that you both have a deep connection.

Eddie can't help but feel jealous as he watches the two of you. He remembers when you used to talk to him like that, but those days are long gone and he missed it like crazy. His thoughts were on the memories that remain you, he remembered the nights you spent together talking about everything and nothing at the same time,he remembered how amazing it was to make you laugh at his joke, he wanted to get that back with you but had no idea where to start and how to do it.

He decides to interrupt your conversation with Rojas, hoping to get your attention. "Hey, Y/N," he says, "Remember that time we went to that concert together, the one where you got lost and I spent the whole show trying to find you in the crowd?"

A smile opens on her face as she remembers the day he mentioned, "Of course I remember, certainly one of the best days of my life. I still can't believe we made it out of there alive," you reply, laughing."

As Eddie watches Warren and you talking and laughing together, he can't help but feel a pang of jealousy and longing in his chest. He remembers the times when it used to be him making you laugh, the way you looked at him with those bright, beautiful eyes that made his heart skip a beat. He remembers the feeling of your warmth next to him, the way your hand fit perfectly in his, and the sound of your voice in his ear as your talked about everything and anything.

But those memories are distant now, and he can't help but feel like he's lost something special. He watches as Warren effortlessly makes you laugh, and he can't help but compare himself to the drummer. Warren has everything he doesn't - a stable family, a successful career, and now, a closeness with you that Eddie can only dream of having again.

As Eddie sits there, lost in his thoughts, he can't help but see parallels between the past and the present. The way you laugh at Warren's jokes is so similar to the way you used to laugh at his, and the way you interact reminds him of the way he and you used to do so. It's like looking into a mirror and seeing what he's lost, what was so distant now.

Just then, Eddie decides he needs to get away. He tells everyone he's going to get a drink and leaves the table, his frustration and longing weighing heavily on him. As he makes his way to the fridge, he can't help but replay the memories of you two in his mind, wishing he could go back in time and make things different.

He listens to the side conversation which was just a rumbling noise that wasn't enough to silence his saboteur thoughts. He stares several times at the fridge in front of him, staring at the drinks without knowing how to get out of the situation or at least get away from this feeling that was growing in him.

Lisa noticed Roundtree far from the group and when he left to get a drink she became concerned about the whole situation, and decided to go talk to him. She approaches him and touches his shoulder, making him turn to the actress.

"Everything alright?" She asks, a smile on her face mixed with her concerned features. "You seemed airy back there." She points out.

"I'm sorry to ask but, doesn't it bother you?" He nods discreetly to the scene of Warren and you talking.

Lisa turns to look at what he's pointing at, arching her eyebrows as she turns back to the bassist. "What, Warren and Y/N?"

Eddie just nods, a little embarrassed at his question. Lisa takes a drink and opens it, handing it to Eddie she leans on the bar next to them and takes a sip of hers. "Warren and Y/N have grown closer over the last few years and I've grown closer to her too, she's like a sister to our family. I'm used to it, maybe at first I was a little jealous but I know my husband is crazy about me." She chuckles, making Eddie opening a shy smile.

He thinks about what to say, but stays quiet, still analyzing his thoughts. "But why the question?" Lisa asks, wanting to understand why the man is uncomfortable.

Eddie takes a deep breath, trying to find the right words to express his thoughts. "It's just... seeing them together, it reminds me of what I lost," he says, his voice barely above a whisper.

Lisa nods understandingly. "You mean your relationship with Y/N?"

Eddie nods in response, taking a sip of the drink Lisa had given him. "I just... I don't know how to talk to her. Things ended so badly between us and I don't want to make things worse, but I also don't want it to end it up like that."

Lisa puts a comforting hand on Eddie's shoulder. "Have you tried reaching out to her? Maybe talking things through could help you both, I'm sure she would be happy to talk to you."

Eddie shakes his head. "I'm not that sure, She was really disappointed that day... I don't know if she'd want to talk to me about it."

Lisa takes another sip of her drink and looks at Eddie with a serious expression. "Look, I know that Y/N and you have some unresolved issues, and that's why you're feeling uneasy. But you know what I've learned over the years? Love is a tricky thing, and sometimes you have to take a leap of faith if you want to make it work."

Eddie nods slowly, taking in her words.

"I remember when Warren and I first started dating, I was so afraid to let my guard down and really let myself fall in love. But then I realized that if I didn't take a chance, I might miss out on something really special. And I'm so glad I did, because we have a beautiful life together."

She pauses for a moment, looking off into the distance. "And I know that Y/N is worth taking a risk for. If you think there's still something there between you two, then you owe it to yourself to at least try and talk to her. Who knows? Maybe it could be the start of something great."

Eddie looks at her, his mind racing with thoughts and emotions. He takes a deep breath and nods. "You're good at giving advice huh." He says with a slight smile.

"I try, have one with me and use the courage of alcohol to talk to her." She says holding out her bottle for him to toast, he does, clinking his bottle against hers.

As they take a sip, Eddie feels a sense of calm wash over him. He knows what he needs to do, and he's grateful for Lisa's words of encouragement.

"Thanks, Lisa. I appreciate it," he says, placing a hand on her shoulder.

"Anytime," she replies with a warm smile. "Now go talk to Y/N. I have a feeling she's been waiting for this conversation for a long time."

Eddie nods, taking one last swig of his drink before setting it down on the bar. He takes a deep breath and turns to make his way over to you, ready to finally have that long overdue conversation.

You notice Lisa and Eddie talking before Lisa returns to Rojas, snuggling into his embrace. Rojas smiles and wraps his arms around his wife's waist, kissing her forehead before she whispers something in his ear. You catch a glimpse of Warren smirking and licking his lips before he stands up.

"I'll be right back, kids," he says with a chuckle.

Lisa guides Rojas to a more secluded spot and whispers to him, "Go for it," nodding in your direction. You don't notice, but Roundtree does, and he looks over at you with a small smile, he takes a deep breath before sitting down next to you.

Feeling his heart beating fast in his chest. He clears his throat before speaking. "So you and Warren, pretty good friends huh?" he asks, trying to keep his tone casual.

You raise your eyebrows and chuckles. "If I didn't know you so well I'd say you're jealous, Eddie Roundtree." You say, teasing him.

Eddie can't help but smile at your words. "Jealousy is a very strong word, maybe, but just maybe it bothered me a little bit," he admits, looking at you with a look that longed to see your reaction and he feels the butterflies in his stomach dance when he hears you laugh at what he said.

You look at Eddie, a smile playing on your lips. "Well, if you're bothered, you can just say so." You says, teasing him a bit.

Eddie smiles back, feeling a bit more relaxed. "I guess I am a little jealous." He admits, looking at you. "I mean, we used to be close like that, you and me."

You nod, understanding where he's coming from. "Yeah, we were. But things change, Eddie."

"I know. And I'm not trying to say that you shouldn't be friends with Warren or anything like that. It's just..." He trails off, not really sure how to put his feelings into words.

"Just what?" You prompt him, your eyes fixed on his.

"Just that...I miss you, gorgeous." Eddie says, his voice barely above a whisper.

You didn't know what to answer, so you just stared at him letting him speak. "I know that day you expected more from me, and I know everything got really messed up between us but I feel like there's so much we haven't talked about..." Eddie said quickly, and you noticing the anxiety building in him take one of your hands, conveying comfort.

He looks at your hand next to his and smiles, stroking your fingers and then continues. "I missed you every day since that day, I decided not to look for you because you didn't seem to want me around. I confess, I wasn't ready to see that disappointment look on your face again."

You take a deep breath and look at Eddie, the guilt weighing heavily on your heart. "Eddie, Don't put all the blame on yourself" you say, pausing for a moment to collect your thoughts. "I know that I played a part in everything that happened between us. It wasn't just you, it was me too."

Eddie looks at you, concern etched on his face waiting for you to continue.

"That day, I was so focused on my own insecurities and fears that I couldn't see past them," you say, feeling a lump form in your throat. "I didn't see that you were hurting too, that you were struggling just as much as I was."

Eddie's hand tightens around yours, and you squeeze back, grateful for the support. "I felt so insufficient, like I wasn't enough for you to want to stay and follow our dream," you continue, your voice shaking slightly. "And I took that out on you. I know now that it was wrong, and I'm so sorry for hurting you as well."

Eddie looks at you, a mixture of emotions on his face. "Y/N, don't say that. You were more than enough, you were my partner, my muse, my reason for living. But I can see why you felt that way, and I'm sorry for not making it all clear."

"It's okay..." you smile, resting your head on his shoulder, he smiles at the contact and you remain silent for a few seconds.

Eddie notices a guitar leaning in a farther corner, he excuses you and goes towards it soon returning with it. You watch him carefully, he starts strumming the instrument and it doesn't take long to recognize the melody.

"Do you remember this one we wrote together?" It keeps playing, humming the melody you created. "Our vacation after we had shot Aurora, the summer we spent in Malibu, just you and me?"

Y/N's eyes light up, "Of course I do. 'Lost in the Sun,' right?"

"I remember it like it was yesterday." He says laughing, and you watched him feeling that butterflies in your stomach that only he knew how to cause. "I woke up without you in bed, I looked for you all over the house and you were on the beach with the guitar in your hand, I sat by your side and listened to what you had composed so far."

"I honestly thought it was awful." You laugh, shyly remembering the occasion.

"It was the first time I heard you sing alone." He says and you are surprised by this information. "You asked me to help you complete the song but I stopped you..."

"That's when you told me you loved me for the first time." Involuntarily some tears appeared in your eye, you were sensitive remembering everything. "We didn't quite finish the song though, did we?" You ask, trying to remember exactly what happened that day.

Eddie grins at you, a mischievous glint in his eyes. "Oh right, I remember now. We got a little distracted, didn't we?"

You roll your eyes playfully, a smirk on your lips. "A little? We totally forgot about the song!"

He chuckles, leaning in closer to you. "Hey, I think we were both pretty busy with other things," he says, his voice low and suggestive.

You giggle, swatting his arm lightly. "We were young and in love, what can I say?"

"That's exactly what I've been missing, you know?" He says smiling and you tighten your grip on his hand. "I've never felt so connected with someone as I did and feel with you."

"Eddie..." You didn't know exactly what to say to him, or what he wanted by saying that to you.

"You don't have to make any commitments to me." He assures you and involuntarily you ease up a little. "I know time has passed and well, things change. But promise me that at least this song we'll finish, please."

"I'd love to finish this with you Roundtree." You answer and he gets a bigger smile on his face.

You get up when you hear Daisy calling you from afar to talk to her and Graham, you say goodbye to Eddie and say you'll be right back but before leaving you turn to him again. "Our connection is unique, only you and I can reproduce. And I sure as hell won't let it die in Chicago." You say before heading towards the redhead

Eddie can't contain his smile, the feeling of anticipation rising inside him. He could feel all that Chicago had taken from him finally being released, as if now after so many years he had the chance to access all the "what ifs" he had created, he knew he couldn't screw things up now and he would do anything to make sure you never regretted the two of you.

...

Hi, I hope you enjoyed it... If you wanted to ask for something my requests are open, and if you want to ask and don't have any ideas check out my prompt list :) xoxo

Want to be tagged when new stories come out?

REASONSMANDY'S TAG LIST

#djats #daisy jones and the six #djats x reader #eddie roundtree x reader #eddie roundtree x fem!reader #eddie roundtree x y/n #eddie roundtree #eddie x y/n #eddie loving #eddie x fem!reader #daisy jones and the six fanfic #the dunne brothers #daisy jones & the six #daisy jones and the 6 #the six #joshua whitehouse #josh whitehouse #djatsedit #djats spoilers

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alpydk · 2 months

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THINGS THAT I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW ABOUT MY FELLOW WRITERS

this is a super fun tag prompt list, thanks @orangekittyenergy

tagging: @sofancydancy and @senualothbrok

Right, let's see how this goes.

Last book I read: Pride and Prejudice. Had never read it before but the whole Tim Downie cameo got me doing it. Then watched the BBC series with a friend and we swooned something major over Colin Firth. I've picked up some other books since then but just haven't found the motivation to get through them. Looking at Dark Tower book 5 as well for the last year...

Greatest literary inspiration: I'm honestly not sure. My partner is the real reader of the two of us. I've enjoyed Dark Tower, The Witcher Series (Honestly still in love with Cahir from them), and Leaves of Grass is my poetry go-to. But inspiration, going to be silly but the Hardcore series by Andy Remic (RIP), is such a great series of books. They're not the most literary genius type books but the action is cool, I love the characters. They make me want to write cool shit too.

Things in my current fandom I want to read but I don't want to write:

Smut. Honestly, my abilities with writing smut are limited. I have no patience for flowery language (yeah I write poetry but I know what I mean.) but it means when it comes to writing my own smut it is very matter-of-fact and lacks what I'm looking for. I'm also very picky about my smut due to an annoying logical brain. If you say someone moves their arm and then they move something else I see that and if I can't follow it directly I'm just going to put it down.

You can recognise my writing by:

Lots of short prose-type sentences. I like the effect of repetition and I especially like writing in a more personal talking type way. I especially love to monologue so if anyone does recognise my writing it's probably from these things. I especially love writing anything angst, it's so therapeutic and I love being able to draw out emotions from other people. I can do this with sweet fluff stuff too but angst really is more enjoyable.

My most controversial take ( current fandom):

I hate the word folds. (Not fandom relations but still.) Makes me think of a packed ham sandwich.

Fandom-related though - Astarion fans can get pretty feral over their views of his character. I get it, Gale fans are the same but I've left groups over the rabidness.

Current writing mood (10 – super motivated and churning out words like crazy, 0 – in a complete rut): Currently about a 4 but it can vary depending on the hour and the inspiration. I completed the Nana story and now feel a little lost as to what the next project will be. Ideas are escaping me.

Top three favourite tropes: The whole "enemy to lovers" thing. I mean this in a 2 people who argue and fall in love, not as in the real enemies to lovers.

Star-crossed lovers, especially if they really are both doomed. Astarion/Karlach if she is going to burn up. I love that tragic acceptance. Give me more of that.

I like a loveable rogue too. Hook from OUAT.

Share a random frustration: AU fiction losing characterisations. Once your fiction hits a point where you could replace the characters with any other from any other series I'm going to stop reading it. Great, you want X to be sub, but if he wouldn't actually act that way in canon, why are you even using him as a character? It's AU, fine but then make it OC or use another fandom. Don't force me to read through 13 chapters of semi-ok stuff just to destroy the characters so you can fulfil the soap opera-esque drama that gets you the hits. I get it's difficult but this is my pet peeve. Rant over...

#tag game #omg writing is hard #rant post

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adanseydivorce · 9 months

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Alison DiLaurentis 2&3!

favorite thing about this character — I really love the interplay in especially early seasons Alison but it does show up at times in s5&6a, of her being capable of being so calculating and smart to scary degrees and play games both with her peers and with adults around her who underestimate her because of her youth and girlishness, yet also there are these moments where you can see it can never quite work to 100% protect her in the society she lives in as a teenage girl is a very misogynistic community that protects predatory adult men or as a bi girl from a conservative (based on Kenneth’s views) family in Virginia, she’s so cunning which I love but that only gets her so far I always think of the flashback where she threatens/blackmails Byron and he grabs her wrist (yikes!:/) and tells her that she plays adult games but is still a child (ew) and how Sasha plays Ali’s reactions that is such a core part of her character to me. Ik that’s not really boiling my favorite thing about her into one trait but I do think that’s a big part of why I’m fascinated with her character in general. Also I just find characters like her who are written in a way that the audiences reaction to her sort of says a lot about them because there are multiple readings possible especially when they’re women to be characters who awaken more creativity in my brain and I love that (even though that’s definitely a double edged sword because part of why she was written like that was the Pll writers wanting to keep multiple options open for what to do with her and they eventually just didn’t know what to do with her at all), it’s why the one Pll fic I’ve written was an Ali char study of sorts lol.

least favorite thing about this character — I touched on it because it kind of goes along with my favorite but the fact the writers clearly didn’t know what to do with her as the plot of the show progressed/especially her arc in the last two seasons (there are things in s5 regarding Ali characterization I actually like better than most people/think is a little better than it gets credit for being although there were still decisions that sucked but then there are stand out moments/episodes I think are great for her so it averages) but her redemption arc in the last two seasons is terrible writing. However (and I’ve mentioned this before/gone on rants about it in tags of other posts I’ve reblogged) I think I dislike the arc for different reasons from why the majority of viewers do, my stance is definitely not that she is “irredeemable/unforgivable” (a stance I’ve seen from people who don’t feel that way about male characters who did much more harm and did also get redemption arcs just an aside) as a character and even attempting to go that route is ridiculous. I do have mixed feelings on whether a redemption arc is the most interesting route for her as villain Alison also has a lot of potential (and I did read all the Pll books last year through beginning of this year so I’ve now seen a version of the story that went there play out and honestly kind of a slay) and I could have liked other storylines for her that didn’t try to categorize her as redeemed or evil as neatly but! I think the greatest failing of that storyline is how Alison needs to lose all of her … Alison-Ness to be considered redeemed. She has to be consistently punished (and constantly talk about how she is responsible for everything bad that has ever happened to herself and other around her) and lose every one of her sharp edges and become an almost unrecognizable character to be considered morally acceptable, it’s an especially frustrating contrast to the way the show treats literally every morally questionable man in Rosewood and I hate it lol. I could maybe have used my economy of words better to say all that I just realized but oh well :).

#thank you again <3 #asks #s speaks #alison dilaurentis #pll #pretty little liars #the formatting is making it one and two instead of two and three #my meta

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waywardstoryenthusiast · 1 year

Text

So, I need to vent. Strictly speaking I’ve already vented, but I want to leave that vent here. One of my favorite fic authors deleted their Ao3 account, and I decided to try and work through my feelings by writing them down. Now that I’m done with that, I don’t want to just delete everything, but I also don’t want to just leave it sitting around and gathering dust. So I’m going to post it here, under a cut. I’ve decided to make it unregbloggable and cause it’s kind of personal, but I would like if whoever reads it could drop a like, just so I know. Be nice to know if I’m not screaming into the void. I also originally typed this up at work between taking calls, so that’s likely the reason for any weirdness. And I’m rambling. Fuck everything.

Okay, last thing before the rant: The author I’m referring to has put up with some shit, which is why they’ve deleted. I went back and forth between leaving their name in or not, or tagging. I eventually decided to leave their name, but will not be tagging them. They made it sound like they won’t be on tumblr anymore, and even if they were this is mostly something I wrote for me. I’ve left a message of support for them already. I don’t want them to have to deal with anything else.

So Glimmerglanger deleted their ao3 account due to dealing with a lot of awful messages and comments. And I'm upset, and struggling to process. So I'm going to try and walk through what I'm feeling, why and what I can do.

It's all a bit of a tangled knot, so I'm going to start with my more

selfish reasons to be upset. I'm angry and sad that I won't be able to

read any of those fantastic stories again. I loved reading them,

they've become such a staple of my reading. Whenever I needed a pick me up or a break I would go back to their stories. Sometimes I would be looking for something in particular, and sometimes I would just go through their entire catalogue. Any time they had a new fic, even if it was just a drabble I would wait with baited breath. I always

enjoyed their writing, and now it seems it's all gone.

And I feel selfish, upset and disappointed with myself because of

that. Because they're their stories, they can do what they want with

their stories. And it sounds like they had excellent reasons to do

what they did. It's not fair to be upset with them for protecting

themselves. But I am angry with them. I'm frustrated and upset that I

didn't get any warning so I could download the fics. And I suppose I'm upset with myself for not downloading them sooner. Silly, since I

didn't know this was coming, but it seems better than being upset with them when they're going through a tough time.

And another reason I'm upset with myself, is how reticent I was with

leaving comments. I kept telling myself I would go back and do it, and now it seems like I wasted too many chances. Maybe it wouldn't have changed anything, but at least we could have had those interactions. Glimmer was one of those authors who always responded to commenters and I loved that. (Not that not responding is a bad thing! Authors already give a lot just by posting, they're not obligated to respond.) I really enjoy having conversations with authors about their writing, and I always looked forward to 'talking' with Glimmer. I think one of

my biggest flaw is being too timid and missing opportunities. Not

leaving comments may seem like a small opportunity, but it mattered to me. And even though I tell myself that it may not have changed their final decision, I can't help but wonder if me leaving more comments (cause I think the only fics of theirs I didn't read read are the ones with a pairing I didn't like or looked too angsty. And I loved all the ones I read enough to want to leave comments, I just kept telling myself I would do it on my next re read, when things were fresh) would have made things at all better for them. If having some good comments may have contributed to making things a little easier or giving them a bit of happiness. I feel guilty. (Course, I also feel guilty about how much I'm making this about me and my feelings.)

And what really infuriates me about all of this was how avoidable it

all was. I've had fics that bugged me. I've started fics that

infuriated me. Where the authors characterization choices drove me up the wall. I've read fics that had me wondering if the author

read/watched the same thing I did. Sometimes when I think of these

fics they still frustrate me. But you know what I did? I clicked the

back button and I went to read something I would enjoy. (Ironically,

sometimes that meant going back to an old favorite, like

Glimmerglanger's works) The worst I would do is write a vent post

(that I might not even post) or reblog someone else's vent post. If

not that, I would start writing an idea for my own fic. I would never

leave a mean or cruel comment. I honestly cannot fathom people who feel like that is a constructive use of their time. It just doesn't

make sense.

Well that's most of my vent done (for now). Now to figure out what to

do. I noticed at least one person mentioned that they downloaded some of their work. I may ask around and see if anyone has their fics in a few days. Not now, it seems disrespectful so soon.

And you know what? I think I will post the comments I wrote out but

never sent. It's unlikely that Glimmer will ever see them, but just on

the off chance. And even if they don't, I don't like the idea of just

deleting them or leaving them in my notes to haunt me.

I'll also try to leave at least a few comments on any fics that do

live open on my phone. (And maybe download a few, just in case!)

Authors give a lot, they deserve what little I can give back.

I feel a bit better. A bit more settled. I'll try to do do a bit of

what I said tonight, and check back in in the morning. (5/4 pm)

I feel sick. Course, I think it's largely due to the news about

Buttons. She made it to at least 18, which I think is pretty old for a cat. But she stopped eating. And we had to make that choice. (And I realize after looking at the dates, it's barely been a year since we had to let Pixie go. And she wasn't even half Button's age. Fuck.) But talk about timing. Could really have used some comfort

right around then. But I really don't want to be upset at glimmer.

Cause none of this is their fault. They had to make the best choice

for them, same as we had to make the best choice for her. The timing

is just awful. And I'm not sure if I should continue writing this,

cause I'm starting to get choked up. And that's not really something I

can afford to do at work. But I feel like I need to get this out now.

I don't know how I'm going to get through the day. I'm not sure if

this is really about glimmer anymore. Or at least not only. I guess I

got home still feeling off after finding out, and then I got hit with

having to make that decision. And now the two things are just kind of

hopelessly tangled together. And I'm not sure how to untangle them.

I did go ahead and leave a few comments on other fics that basically live on my phone, like glimmer's did. It made me feel a little

better. Maybe I'll try to leave some more. It helps take my mind off

things, a little bit. Focusing on other fics and what I like about

them and trying to put it into words. I hope I get a reply or two. I

know that's not the reason I'm commenting, but I could use some

connection.

I also kind of want to pick up Crush again. Maybe not the best idea,

since I already feel pretty bad. But maybe it would be nice to read

the words, to feel less alone in my head, with these feelings. My

insides feel like a bruised peach. Twisted, squishy and raw. Or maybe

a tenderized bit of meat would be a better analogy. I probably

shouldn't have decided to listen to the sadness playlist. But

listening to anything happy feels disingenuous and discordant. Same

urge that led me to find those loving death comics again. Needed to

feel understood. Was a bit cathartic.

Still feeling upset. Think this one is going to linger for a while. We really lost a star. I can't blame glimmer for making the best choice for themselves. And I don't, I'm not just saying that. I just keep falling into this 'feel sorry for myself' pit. Course, as mentioned the timing was awful. I probably would have been reaching for some of glimmer's fics for comfort anyway. But it's like a bruise that I keep forgetting about and poking. I've tried not to think about it, when I'm not doing this, to try and let it settle. I tell myself, 'Don't think about this other thing,' which I figure works better than trying, 'Don't think about Glimmer having to leave.' Reverse psychology I guess. And it kind of works. But it's a loose tooth, I keep worrying at it, even though I know I shouldn't. And I keep wanting to ask around and see if other people have downloads of the fics they would be willing to share. But that just makes me ashamed of myself. It just seems selfish and disrespectful, especially so soon after they deleted. I won't lie to myself, I probably will try at some point. But I want to exert some self control, and not go hounding folks so soon after it happened.

I think I may post this after all. It may be a bad idea, and I

probably won't let it be reblogged. But I feel the need to be seen. To

be heard. (5/5 am)

I just really foolish. I keep asking myself why I didn't leave more

comments or download the fics when I had the chance if I loved them so much? Logically, in regards to the comments, I know it's because I'm a bit of a procrastinating perfectionist. I liked their fics enough that I wanted to be certain I got things right. I'd make little notes to myself, and say I'd come back later. I assumed they would always be there, which is also the reason I never downloaded them. Now I feel naive. And trying to make my peace with the fact that I may never see these fics again. I keep trying to press them all into my memory so I don't forget, though maybe it would be better if I could.

These feelings just keep sneaking up on me. And I keep feeling like

I'm making mountains out of molehills. Glimmer is the one who was really hurt by all of this. And that's another thing I keep trying to wrap my head around. I've always thought there fics were great, it's hard to

believe people would send such awful comments to them. I don't mean that I don't believe left horrible comments, I just can't understand what they would have to make comments about? Course, if people want to be nasty they don't need a reason, just an excuse. But it's still messed up. (5/6 am)

I think that's all now. This may have been a bit silly, it's not like glimmer is dead, they're just gone. But what happened to them sounded awful. They deserved better. And as I type this, I wonder if this is why I'm so hesitant about actually sitting down and writing out my ideas. Cause if I do, I'll want to post them. And I can honestly say, I'm scared of people's opinions. I have a thin skin. But that's another day's problem.

I'm also trying to avoid the main fandom I read stuff of theirs from.

It's still just a little too closely intertwined for me at the moment.

Not easy, it's one of my preferred fall backs, currently. But it is what it is.

Well, don't think I have anything else to say. At least, nothing that wouldn't be repeating myself. I think I'm less sad now. I think things will be better. I just wish it hadn't come to this, for glimmer's sake.

#wayward rambles #wayward vents #you deserved better #i hope you'll be okay

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hivemindscape · 2 years

Text

Hello boys!!

I've been getting messages from the kindest people in my inbox, it was killing me to see you upset, so i decided to respond in this way.

I want to hug the crimeboys community. I want to hug you so tightly.

I am genuinely happy for those of you who enjoyed the finale. I envy you, because I did not.

There isn't a chance that I'll ever like it, either, as I've been turning it over and over in my brain relentlessly, reading people's takes when i can make myself to, grappling for a buoy, something to make it okay. In brief moments of the "no thought brain empty" state, I'm fine, but mostly there's intense frustration and confusion. And Big Sad.

In my opinion, this was an awful ending for these two characters. I hate that I'm forced to accept it, so I probably won't.

That being said, I'd rather you didn't message me asking why I'm of this stance, or moreover writing me an essay on why I'm wrong, I dont have the energy or patience to compose a pretty reply to that.

Keep in mind, most importantly, that everyone is entitled to their opinion on this lore, and is free to critize the writing, providing they don't go insulting ccs in their faces. If you see someone making fun of those who are processing their grief in public spaces, understand that the former people are emotionally immature and had poor upbringing. Yes, I said grief. What I've been feeling for the past 3 days was heartbreak and grief, with its physical manifestations. So I'm here to say it's alright if you breathe around a boulder too.

What you have to be doing as part of the fandom is have empathy and respect for people you do not know on the internet. Recognise you have no high ground to dictate what's the right reaction. Introspect a bit if you have an urge to tell someone to "chill": what impact that comment would have, and recognize that there's none. You'd just come across as an asshole.

I was intending to not go on a rant about that, but it's an apparent problem currently which I couldn't not address, as it turned out. You might be thinking "Bro they're speaking so seriously as if someone died". If so, the following should explain it well enough:

Ability and desire to give your heart to something fictional is a valuable, bright, very telling character trait. This is empathy of the highest order. This means one's heart is immense, and strong. Sorry for speaking cliche, but I do want you to read into what I'm saying.

Have you ever felt enveloped in a hug by someone's mere text message, when they said they understand, relate, and support you? This is incredible. You read fics and cry, you look at art and feel warmth in your chest, you talk with other fans and feel connected. This is a gift that we have, to be connected through this fictional story. And the media format that it uses does not matter here, only makes it surprising and unique.

So. You're valid to be satisfied with the ending. You're valid to be unhappy with it. It's valid to be deeply unhappy because of it. These characters meant the world to me. The trust I put in the content creators not to ruin them was immense. I'm currently figuring out where to go from here creatively.

I want to promise hovewer, that I'll do my best to recover from this shit, and bring comfort to you guys with my crimeboys art again. Its largely because of you and your love for my work that I've decided that. But also this fandom is the place where Ive felt the happiest with myself in my whole life. It's insane, I don't want to lose this.

If you have anything you want to send me, any fic or any art, you can dm me on twitter or instagram of the same name as this blog. I'm currently trying to keep distance from dsmp content (key word trying), but if it's something you're passionate about sharing, I'll go and appreciate it as soon as i can. It means a lot to me when you guys share your thoughts and your work with me Q^Q 💜💜💜

Your messages and your tags under the last piece that's blown up, have been a huge comfort to me. A Huge comfort. Thank you so so much for letting me know. I create art cause its the meaning of me, to be influencing people's emotions, leaving a mark, so I'm incredibly happy I could help you feel better in this time, and any other time. 🫂

Thank you guys. And I'm sorry.

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tsukikento · 2 years

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Haii, it’s me, the fangirl that sporadically leaves u a fan message :>

I’ve already had read chapter 22 of Empathetic, but I guess that my mind was more like on a state of “catching up” rather than just immersing in the story, you know? I decided to ge back to the chapter where Aizawa tells the bad news, and dear All Might. Even when knowing what happened, I felt 10x more in tune with the emotion than the last time. The frustration, the loneliness, the overwhelming, everything.

But that GYM scene at the end of chapter 22??? OMG. Last time all I felt was the second hand embarrassment of the situation (plus bakugo being flirty as fuck made me uncomfortable for the others at the gym) but now that I’ve read it again and focused more on the feelings? Damn. Give me 2 of your bakugo’s to go, please. What a treat, I swear. And I love that Y/N was agency and is like also poking back at the bear? I can see why Bakugo likes her, you know?

Cuz here’s the thing I sometimes see on other FF, they tend to pair bakugo to a just as witty MC who also is a calm breeze or female sunshine Kirishima. (Ofc, these are generalizations) but they miss core narrative elements of Bakugo’s journey as a character. They grab a stationary bakugo instead of building up with the development momentum of his story arc.

Idk, I keep ranting unnecessarily, sorry. All in all, great read, fantastic enjoyment. 10/10. Keep up the good work!

PS: more Shinso wouldn’t be so bad 👀 it was a breath of fresh air on hot skin. I loved that chapter too.

THESE RANTS ARE NOT UNNECESSARY!! As i go through life, looking back to these asks and feeling motivation sore through my body is all I need. I seriously loooooove hearing all these thoughts

<333333

Also you haven't asked, but I am just adding you to my tag list bc you deserve it <3

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suchalonelysunflower · 3 years

Text

Tell Me What You’re Thinking (c.h)

Pairing: Calum Hood x Fem! Reader

Summary: You overhear something you shouldn’t hear. But Calum will make it right, won’t he?

Warnings: ANGST. Language (including insults), mentions of alcohol, drugs and cheating. MC with low self esteem. Some grammar mistakes (English is not my first language, I’m sorry)

Word count: 4 k

Author’s Note: hi I’m back with the angsty shit. This is very self indulgent, and I put Mitchy as a bad guy here, so sorry if you like him? Reblogs, Commets, Feedback and likes are very welcomed and encouraged! I love to hear from you guys ❤️ hope you like it and Happy Reading ✨🦋🌻

My materialist // wanna be part of my tag list?

You sighed as you finished your last paper. It was finals week and you were officially done with your exams and term papers for the semester. The last couple of weeks were rough and no one knew that more than you and your boyfriend Calum who has been by your side through this whole stressing process.

You smiled to yourself as you remembered the encouraging words that Calum often said to you. He knew how hard you worked in school and at your part time job in a law firm, and you appreciated how much he cared for you in times of stress and frustrations. Always cheering you up from the bleechers as you made a name for yourself.

Calum promised that once you were done with school for the semester, he was going to take you out on a well deserved Holiday, just the two of you and Duke as you celebrated another six months worth of work done. Everything was already planned for the next weekend and you couldn’t wait.

You reread your final essay one more time and decided that it was enough for today and if there were any mistakes left, then you’ll deal with them tomorrow. Now the only thing in your mind was a cozy blanket and a feel good movie. But first, you needed to get some food and drinks for your mini celebratory self care session.

The thought of asking Calum to come join you crossed your mind, but you quickly remembered that tonight was boys night. Every couple of weeks Calum and his friends have a little night out to catch up and decompress all of the stress of the week. Tonight was Calum’s turn to host boys night as they decided to have a quiet night in, so they must be having a good time downstairs and you didn’t want to ruin the mood.

With that thought in mind, you carefully placed your laptop on Calum’s side of the bed and carefully untangled your legs from under the covers so you wouldn't wake up Duke, who snuggled with you every time you had to work to keep you company. You put on one of Calum’s hoodies and headed downstairs trying your best to not make any sound.

Before you even reached the last step of the stairs, you could already hear your boyfriend’s laugh and it made your heart flutter. Even after almost three years of being together, his laugh still gives you butterflies every time you hear it, falling even more in love than what is possible.

Once you were in the kitchen, you started looking into the cupboards as you searched for your favorite snacks, but in the end you were unable to find any, thinking that maybe Calum has hidden them somewhere on the top shelves where he knows you can’t reach.

Letting out a small huff, you debated with yourself the option of climbing up the counter or admitting defeat and go ask your boyfriend for some help. Luckily, you didn’t have to decide as you heard a familiar voice behind you.

“Well, if it isn’t my favorite scholar” Said Ashton with a light chuckle “What are you doing here? I thought you’d be out tonight since it’s boys night”

You smiled as you let him wrap his arms around you to give you a hug. Ashton was the first friend you made when you moved to LA a couple of years back, he was the one who introduced you to Calum in the first place, and you were very thankful for having him as a best friend.

“I had to finish up some term papers, so I had to reschedule my girl’s night for tomorrow” You explained to the black haired man “And what are you doing here? Need a refill?” You ask, pointing to the empty glass he was holding.

Ashton nodded, “Yeah, but I also needed a time out. Mitchy is kinda being very obnoxious today” He said with a sigh.

Mitchy Collins was a close friend with the boys for many years now, but you can’t say that he is a friend of yours. It’s not like you haven’t tried to befriend the singer, on the contrary, you both had multiple chances to get to know each other but he either ignored you or made things very awkward between you. And, to be honest, you were not that excited to become his friend either. There was something weird about him, a bad vibe per se, that made you not trust him at all. He was always very loud, obnoxious and downright rude sometimes and it made you very uncomfortable. Both Calum and Ashton knew about your uneasiness with Mitchy, so they didn’t push it too far and you were thankful for that.

“Oh?” You asked, trying to mask your discomfort “What is he saying this time?”

“Just a bunch of bullshit, to be honest. He is very high right now and thinks he’s above everyone else” Ashton said, taking a seat on one of the kitchen island stools. You did the same as you offered him a glass of water.

“Are you high right now?” You chuckled.

“Nope. Calum and I decided to stay clean tonight cause tomorrow we start early in the studio and the weed kinda messes up our pipes” He explains.

“What about Luke and Mikey?”

“They are not here yet, they said they needed to finish up something for a song and then they will meet us here” Ashton shrugged, not giving it too much importance “And what about you, darling? How was your day?”

You began to tell Ashton about how you finally finished the semester and how excited you were for your little getaway with Calum next week. However, every couple of minutes you were interrupted by a loud laugh or an obnoxious comment coming from the living room where the rest of the boys were sitting. Sometimes their loud comments started loud conversations that neither of you could help but overhear, but you did your best to ignore them. But some things are easier said than done.

“I’m telling you man! You can do so much better” You heard Mitchy’s voice echoing through the house, followed by a chuckle from Calum who mumbled something among the lines of “Fuck off”

You furrowed your eyebrows as you stopped the conversation you had with Ashton in order to pay attention to what was being said down the hall. You looked at Ash with a confused face, wondering what they could be saying but at the same time not knowing if you should continue listening to their private affairs. You were about to open up your mouth to continue what you were saying until another comment made by Mitchy caught your attention.

“You have to admit she is the worst sometimes. All she does is boss you around like you are some kind of puppet. She is the definition of annoying”

You sat up straight as you looked at Ashton, who mirrored your puzzled expression.

“Is- is he talking about me?” You asked in a whisper.

Ashton shook his head “I don’t thi-”

“I swear! What does she even do besides work and study all the time? She barely has time for you. You said it yourself! And when she’s not doing any of those things? She’s nagging around and clinging to you like you’re a damn purse! That’s who Y/N is”

You froze in the spot. So they were talking about you… and did Calum really say you don’t have time for him? You don’t even get time to yourself and he knows that! He said he was okay with it, that he understood and supported you through and through… Guess not.

“I still don’t know what you saw in her, dude. She’s just plain boring, playing to be a good girl when in reality she has zero personality” He continued his rant “She does nothing for you! Honestly! I’m surprised you made it this far with that bitch”

You knew that wasn’t true. He never really made an effort to get to know you! how could he be saying all those stuff? You did everything for Calum, all your goals, your plans are for the both of you. How could he know that if he never really talked to you? But you had to admit that that first comment really hurt. You were always doubting yourself at the beginning of your relationship with Calum, always feeling like you weren’t good enough, or pretty enough, or smart or fun or hot… To fight off those kinds of feelings was a difficult job to say the least, but Calum was always there to fight them with you, reassuring you that he loved you. He loved every part of you and he will love you forever.

“Is she at least a decent fuck? Cause I don’t see her doing anything remotely interesting in bed” Mitchy laughed “If she’s not she’s just wasting your time”

You noticed how Ashton suddenly stiffened next to you when he heard Mitchy’s comments. His knuckles turned white as he gripped his fists at the side of his body “Okay, that’s enough” But you were quicker, grabbing onto his shirt as a sign to make him stay there with you and not cause a scene.

His eyes found yours and you could see the anger build up on them, you knew that he would defend you no matter what and you loved him for that. But you knew Calum would defend you over there, he wouldn't let him talk about you that way.

“Ash, please” You pleaded, tugging on his shirt for him to take a seat again. But he preferred to stay standing next to you, almost like guarding and shielding you from any other comment that might hurt your feelings.

“I can’t let him talk about you like that!” He hissed. But you just shook your head.

“I know, Ash. I know. But Cal will handle it” You said confidently, trying to keep yourself together.

You knew Calum would not let those comments slide. Even if you weren’t in the room with him, those comments were awful and very hurtful, no one deserves to be treated like that, especially by someone as close as a friend of his.

You waited for his intervention, but your heart crushed when the only thing you heard from him were laughs.

“She’s a good fuck” That’s all he said.

The grip you had on Ashton’s shirt suddenly flattered as you fought the lump in your throat “Y-you said he wasn’t high” You whispered to Ashton, who was just as frozen as you were after hearing his best mate’s comment.

“He’s not” He said, standing tall next to you. As much as he wanted to go in there and give the guys an earful, he knew you needed him here with you.

Out of all the things Mitchy has said, out of all the insults and belitments, that’s what he says? That you’re a good fuck?

You knew that you could be annoying sometimes when you got happy. You just wanted to share that happiness with everyone around you and you thought… you thought that Calum liked that. You were not a bad girlfriend, you always tried your best to make him as happy as he makes you; to love him as much as he loves you, cause he loves you. Doesn’t he?

If he loves you then why is he letting his friend say all of this stuff about you? Why is he not saying anything? Does- does he agree with him?

The tears started rolling silently, half of you not believing what you were hearing while the other half clang to the idea of Calum defending you at some point.

“Oh I know!” Said Mitchy after a while “I can introduce you to someone! Right now, actually. Her name’s Vanessa and she’s crazy hot, dude”

He can’t be serious.

Ashton looked at you with pleading, furious eyes. Almost begging you to go and let him deal with them. But you grabbed his hand and made him stay. This has to be it. This has to be the chance for Calum to say something.

“You’re kidding right?” The curly haired man asked. Making you let out a breath of relief.

“Not at all! Think about it. We go, you meet her, you fuck her and done!” He said like it was nothing “Y/N will never find out cause she’s stuck up her ass. Your fans will never know or they won’t care cause they don’t even know you are in a ”relationship” to begin with! You are single to their eyes. And you get a decent fuck from someone who looks the part and knows how to have fun! It’s a win - win!”

Your heart stopped as you waited for Calum to answer. To tell Mitchy to go fuck himself. To tell him that he loves you and would never do that to you.

“I don’t know, man. I’ll think about it” Calum shrugged “Plus, if we go out I’ll have to tell Y/N. She’s upstairs finishing some shit for her university”

“Fucking hell… see! I told you! A stuck up bitch” Mitchy said, making Calum laugh.

But their laughs and the rest of the conversation grew numb to your ears. Your body trembled as the tears came flooding in, holding in the sobs that were tearing up your throat. How could he? He was really thinking of cheating on you.

You could feel every little piece of your heart shattered as you search for some kind of leverage that could hold you still so you don’t fall and break. You felt ill, disgusted and heartbroken.

As you tried to get up, you felt your knees buckle and almost fell to the ground if it weren’t for Ashton holding you up. He was still there and you knew by the look in his eyes that he was not going anywhere.

He was just as disgusted and angry as you. He couldn’t believe all the things that were said tonight, all the things that Calum failed to make it right and hurt you in the process. He knew that if he were in that room that the conversation would’ve died the moment it started. He would never let them talk about you that way.

“I-I can’t-“ You cried, moments away from hyperventilating “I can’t stay here, Ash”

He nodded, pulling you into a hug and kissing the top of your head for reassurance “Go upstairs, love. Grab your stuff and we’re getting out of here. You’re staying with me tonight, okay?” Ashton let go of you and started walking towards the living room where the rest of the guys were still talking.

“Ash” You called, making him turn around “D-don’t make a scene, please”

He sighed as he muttered a quiet “okay” before turning around, leaving you alone as you went upstairs to grab the bare necessities to spend the night, you’ll figure out the rest later. Right now you just needed to get out of here.

You opened the bedroom door and almost collapsed at the entrance. Duke came running towards you, sensing that there was something wrong as he started to whine and tried to jump into your arms. That only made you cry harder as you realized that you were leaving him too. You fell to the floor and patted the puppy as he tried to wipe off your tears with his tongue, breaking your heart even more.

A loud voice cut you out of your thoughts. You could hear Ashton yelling, although you couldn’t exactly figure out what he was saying. This meant that Calum knew you heard everything and that, if he had at least some decency left in him, he would come and get you. You needed to act fast.

You stood up and grabbed the first big bag that you could find. Inside of it you threw your laptop, your books, your charger, some clothes and some bathroom essentials. You debated on whether or not to take with you a picture of you, Calum and Duke… it was your favorite memory with them. But the damage was stronger than the nostalgia, so you threw that picture to the ground before you left the room that once belonged to you.

You were running down the stairs when you passed Calum running up them. You ignored him as he stopped in his tracks and followed you to the hall.

“Y/N!” He said, desperate to try and stop you “Y/N, baby, please! Hear me out!”

“Hear what?! I already heard enough!” You said as you turned around.

Calum’s face was almost unrecognizable. The fear in his eyes, the desperation in his voice and his close off body language was not something you’d normally see in him. The “I fucked up” expression showed all the regret in the world, yet you didn’t seem to care at the moment.

“I. Heard. All of it, Calum” You cried through gritted teeth, anger boiling inside of you as you stared at the man you thought you’d marry “All of it and not once did I hear you say something to try and defend me. How do you think that made me feel?!”

“Baby-“ He tried, but you cut him off.

“I work my ass off all day and night for you, for us. For me to go and see you on tour like you ask me to, knowing damn well I would go to the ends of this fucking earth for you! Catching up extra classes and shifts so I can go with you. I cancel everything to be with you. I gave up everything for us to be together. I barely even have time for myself as I try my best to be something worthy of you!” Your tears were staining your face, but you pushed away the pain for a moment, knowing that once you break down it’s over “I try my best to be a good girlfriend, a good friend! I loved you with all my heart and this is what I get after almost three years? A good fuck? That 's it?”

Calum’s world fell to the floor as he tried hard to fight off the lump in his throat, whispering in a broken voice “Loved?”

“That’s all you get from it?” You ask defeated “Calum I would’ve never let my friends call you names, insult you or offend you in any way. I would’ve gone to the ends of the world for you, defended you till the day I die. All because I trusted you to do the same for me and you failed me, Calum. You broke me. You let him call me a bitch, a stuck up, worthless, stupid, bossy, annoying… should I go on? Cause those words are now printed in my memory, next to you agreeing to all of those things. Is that what you think of me?”

“Baby, I swear it’s not like that!” He said, grabbing your hand and trying to make you stay “I fucked up! I know! You are right, I failed you and you don’t know how much I hate myself for it! But please, love. You know I could never think of you like that… you are the most wonderful person there is! You are kind, smart, loving, beautiful-“

“Did you cheat on me?” You ask bluntly.

“What?”

“Did you cheat on me?”

“No!” Calum said instantly “No, I would never!”

You nodded “Yet, you thought of it.”

Calum opened his mouth to say something, but you cut him off again “Is that why you never made our relationship public? So you could have a free pass whenever you want to? Cause I thought it was to protect our privacy, for us to have a normal life in the midst of the chaos that is to date a celebrity. When you told all of that I thought “wow, this is a guy with integrity and with values” Yet I don’t know what to believe now. I thought you loved me-“

“I do love you-“

“I thought you loved me” You said, the tears were already dry as the anger came flooding in “But you don’t hurt the people you love. You don’t break them like you did to me. You don’t let anyone hurt them, even if they are not in the room with you. And you don’t cheat on them like you were going to tonight with that girl Vanessa while I waited here like an idiot for you to come home and spend some time with me”

You pull your hand out of his grasp, holding onto your bag as you heard Calum cry “Y/N-“

“You are free to do whatever you want now, Calum. Cause to the eyes of your fans you are single, and I am as well”

You turned around and saw Ashton waiting by the door with his keys in his hand. He opened up the door for you as you walked by, ignoring all of Calum’s pleads for you to stay.

“So you are just going to leave?!” He yelled, not knowing what else to do. “Whe- Where are you taking her Ashton?”

The black haired man made sure that you were already sitting in his car before turning around to face his friend “I’m taking here with me and away from you cause that’s what she needs now. So don’t bother calling or showing up cause you are not welcome right now. And don’t even try to call Luke or Michael cause they already know and we won’t support you on this” Ashton said as calm as he could. He already told him off, but the anger of seeing you cry in front of him still resided in him.

“I- I love her , Ash! You can’t just take her away from me. I’m her boyfriend!”

“Correction, you were her boyfriend. And I can take her away and I will cause she asked me to” He said taking an intimidating step closer to Calum “Cause while you were here talking trash about her behind her back, planning on how to cheat on her. I was back there, holding her while she broke down crying cause she couldn’t believe that her boyfriend didn’t stand up for her and let a fucking stranger insult her all night long! You weren’t there to see her eyes water or her lip tremble. You weren’t there when she begged me with tears in her eyes to not make a scene cause all she wanted to do was to get out of here. She is the most amazing person ever, she is a light in all of our lives and you extinguished her without a second thought. You might be my friend, but she is too and I love her and I will defend her no matter what, she doesn’t deserve this kind of crap you just showed to her. So don’t count on me to try and help you get her back, I won’t blame her if she doesn’t”

Calum felt small as Ashton walked away from him, closing the door with a bang and leaving him all alone in his big house. Well, almost.

“Dude, that was intense” Mitchy laughed as he placed a hand on Calum’s shoulder “So, wanna go now?”

A blind rage fell over Calum as he heard the mocking laughs of his so-called friend, acting like his life just didn’t fall apart in front of him.

Calum grabbed the singer by the neck of his shirt and pushed him forcefully against the wall “You are going to get out of my house and never come back. You hear me?!” He yelled to his face, almost letting out steam from his nostrils as he was sure he could kill him right now.

“Dude, what’s wrong with yo-“

Calum quickly grabbed a bottle from his nearby mini bar, suddenly gaining all the courage he should’ve had hours ago, and throwed it to Mitchy’s feet, making him jump “Get the fuck out!” He yelled, grabbing bottle after bottle, glass after glass and throwing them into the ground “OUT!”

Only when the last bottle was smashed into pieces did he realize he was completely alone.

And only then did he allow himself to cry for the loss of the love of his life, walking away from him and leaving him to pick up the pieces of two broken hearts.

part 2

Tags: @iknowyouthinkimbulletproof @talksoprettyjjx @mystic-232

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cicissketchbook · 3 years

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Okay so sometime ago, I think about five years ago, I saw some things in the tag about how April and Donnie’s interactions were abusive. It angered me greatly because I am of the opinion that misusing that word really devalues it and as a result, real abuse isn’t taken as seriously as it should be. During that time, I wrote this really long piece in the notes app of my phone, one part ranting, one part sharing, basically just putting my frustrations into words. I never posted it because I really didn’t want to open the doors of communication about the topic of abuse. Basically I didn’t want to put myself in a situation where people would try to argue with me about my own experience.

Some time has past now and some people expressed interest in wanting to read that post. I know that those individuals that expressed interest and are coming from a place of respectful curiosity, so this is for everyone else that might stumble across this post.

Trigger warning: this post is about abuse. Not abuse in the show, not abusive characters, this is about real life actual abuse. This is basically me demonstrating why something is not abusive, by showing you what is.

Also, it should go without saying that this is a story that’s very personal to me, I’m being a little bit vulnerable by sharing some aspects of that story. This doesn’t have my whole abuse story, but it has bits and pieces. You don’t have to agree with me, but please at least be respectful.

I’m posting this because people have expressed interest in reading it. If you don’t like it or don’t want to read it, just scroll away.

And bare in mind I wrote most of this like five years ago.

So I saw something in the tag earlier about how someone or some people think Aprils treatment of Donnie is emotionally abusive and I am here to put this to rest right now. I'm sure he bulk of the fandom doesn't think this way, but I haven't stopped thinking about it since I saw it earlier and I'd just like to throw this out there. And honestly, I'm not even talking about just the Tmnt fandom.

For the love of God, stop throwing that word around like you know what you're talking about.

It's been my experience, coming from an abusive childhood myself and having been the one to help my best friend escape from her abuser, people don't really know what it is unless you've experienced it. That's not to say that you have to be a victim to recognize it, but to truly understand what it is and how it makes a person feel, it's hard to imagine if its never happened to you. People love to fucking throw that word around and nothing makes me see red more than that.

First off, you sound ignorant as hell. Second of, by seeing interactions you don't like and calling them abusive, you are devaluing the seriousness of real abuse. And because that word gets thrown around so much, the line of what is considered abusive is so blurry now. Now you have people who think they're abused when they're not (kids who get spanked for example), and you have people are really are abused but they don't know it (partners who make excuses for each other).

You think April is emotionally abusive to Donnie? Honey, I will tell you what real abuse is like. Real abuse is being told that you aren't smart enough to come up with any good ideas on your own. Real abuse is being told that every good thing that has happened to you only happened because [your abuser] is in your life. Real emotional and verbal abuse is being humiliated and belittled and made to think you aren't good enough and nothing you do is good enough or ever will be. That your feeling are not valid and that you have no worth outside what this one person says you have.

It is not abuse to disagree or argue with someone, it is not abuse to speak your mind even if it hurts someone else’s feelings. Just because someone has a negative reaction to something you did or said, that doesn’t mean your actions were abusive. Their reaction does not define your behavior.

The literal definition of emotional abuse is the attempt to control someone else. Be that through manipulation or gaslighting or isolating. Like I said before, the abusers goal is for the victim to think they need them, they are worthless without them, they could never make it on their own without them.

And then of course, there’s physical abuse, where your head is slammed in a door and your nose is busted open.

Abuse isn’t this casual thing that happens sometimes, you don’t say “oh that person is kind of abusive” like it’s a character flaw. What you’re thinking of is just someone being mean. You can be mean without being abusive and you can be abusive without being “mean”, One of the steps in the cycle of abuse is literally love bombing. It’s a manipulation tactic to get you to think that the abuser is just doing this because they care about you, they want to protect you, they want what’s best for you.

And the affects of that can stay with you your entire life. To this day, I’m instantly distrustful anyone Who reaches out to me because I think they know my abuser. I suck at communicating because even the slightest hint that someone is mad or upset puts me in defense mode. If someone voice raises above a certain volume, even if it’s not at me, I shut down. I have to remove myself from the situation. I am literally in capable of communicating with someone who I perceive to be angry, even if they aren’t. Like my mouth will not form words, all I can think about is getting away from this person. I’ve been in situations where someone will move or approach me a certain way and I throw my arms up to cover my face. I’ve had relationships suffer because I would 100% rather be by myself then put myself in what I perceive to be danger, even though my logical brain knows that this person is not my abuser. My last boyfriend used to get mad at me because he felt like he was having to tiptoe around my trauma. To which my response was, “I literally just said I don’t like being yelled at, this shouldn’t be hard.”

This shit isn’t funny, it’s traumatizing.

(if you’re curious about this, I recommend looking up the cycle of abuse. A common thing is outsiders looking in and not understanding why someone can’t just leave an abusive situation, and then when the victim says it’s not that simple, they just don’t understand how that can be. Viewing abuse from an outside perspective makes it seem very black-and-white, but knowing the cycle of abuse can help to better understand what a victim is going through.)

(My abuser happened to be my stepmother, but it still affects me in both romantic and platonic relationships.)

(Also I’m not even going to touch on the thousands of people that are literally murdered every year for trying to get away from their abusers.)

Anyway….

I have yet to see anyone actually provide any kind of legitimate reasoning or example of April being abusive. Because she’s not, the examples aren’t there because they don’t exist. “Leading someone on” isn’t abusive. And I’ve talked before about how April doesn’t even do that.

Just because you don’t like some thing, doesn’t mean it’s abusive. And if half of these people actually knew what real abuse was, I guarantee they’d shut their mouth with a quickness.

It’s assholes that throw that word around that make is so victims of real abuse aren’t taken seriously.

If anyone has any instances where they think April was being abusive, let me know and I would love to debunk them for you. No, not discuss it, debunk it. This isn’t up for discussion.

#tmnt 2012 #april o'neil #donatello #apriltello #apritello #donnie #tmnt #abuse #abusestory #may be triggering #triggering content

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fandomscombine · 4 years

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Period Cravings

BG: Periods can be a pain. Food cravings are usually the easiest to handle. But with Hogwarts under curfew and not willing risk it all for the blood quill what could you do? Looks like someone had go above and beyond to help.

A/N: Why did I decide to write something about food in the middle of the night, it’s like I wanted to make myself crave on purpose!

This is an entry to @blisfvll ‘s 1.5 celebration writing challenge! With the following prompts:

14. “I swear to God I’ll punch you.” “You can’t even reach my shoulder.”

15. “I don’t know if I wanna kill you or kiss you.”

WC:1223.

>>MASTERLIST<<

>>JOIN MY WRITING CHALLENGE!<<

You don’t normally get period cramps you are very thankful for, but of course when it does come, it hurts like hell. Luckily Madam Pomfrey has a supply of menstrual pain-relieving potions available for those in need. Which you had taken after dinner. Although now sitting in front the common room fire, you had another problem. Cravings. Which magic unlikely could not fix. Oh what you would do for a plate of a hot chocolate lava cake topped with cold vanilla ice cream! A glance to the clock- 9:55 pm- had killed whatever small hope of getting that sweet treat from the kitchens. It was almost curfew.

The last of the students were arriving back, deflated like always after Umbridge had become High Inquisitor and held Hogwarts with an iron grip.

‘If you keep making that face y/n, your brows are gonna be permanently sewn together.’ Fred remarked.

Which only made you scowled further.

‘Sorry Sorry!’ Fred raised his arms in surrender. ‘I bet you would still look cute even when your face ultimately stays mad.’

Did he just called you cute?- Well no exactly but also could he be? You thought but before your brain could process if his teasing had something behind it, your body reacted first. Next thing you know, you had hit his arm.

‘Ouch woman! You hit hard!’

‘Well these chaser arms do pay off even outside of quidditch.’ You knew Fred only tried to cheer you up. He always does, when he sees you down or anyone for that matter and would crack jokes to brighten the day.

Placing your hand on his arm as to lessen the pain you begin, ‘I’m sorry. You were just trying to make me feel better and I released all this crap onto you.’

‘Heyyy heyy it’s okay.’ Fred said, pulling you for an embrace, ‘Take it out on me all you want, I can take it. Anything for you.’

Breaking away he continues, ‘What’s got you bitter anyway?’ Genuine concern in his eyes.

You looked away. ‘Ahh it’s so stupid- It’s nothing really.’

‘I am Fred fucking Weasley, I do stupid things all the time. Try me.’

‘I want a hot plate of lava cake with ice cream.’

‘Say what now?’ Fred stated, a bit confused.

‘I would die for some lava cake and ice cream right now.’ You stated with a deadpanned face.

‘This craving is driving me insane!’ You explained. ‘Normally I would just sneak out to the kitchens but now with the threat of getting my hand scarred with the blood quill, it is a no go. No way am I risking that just for a period craving. I wouldn’t even wish the blood quill to a bully.’

‘yeah yeh….’ Fred mumbled, lost in his own thought.

Waving a hand in front of his face ‘Freddie are you even lis—’

Fred abruptly stood up. ‘I—I got to go y/n. I forgot something in the—’ Running out of the common room, the rest of his sentence cut off by the closing of the door.

An hour later, right before you were getting ready for bed. Your roommate had come in giggling, ‘Y/n! Good you’re still up. Fred is downstairs waiting for you by the way.’

Waiting for me? What could this boy be up to now??

But you nod anyway. ‘Thanks y/f/n. I’ll be right down.’ You put on your fluffy slippers and make your way down to the common room.

You first caught sight of Fred pacing, making your way closer to the communal study tables you then saw it. ‘WHAT THE-‘you exclaimed.

‘Surprise!’ Fred said with handing presenting the table full of desserts- Chocolate frogs, cauldron cakes, hot butterbeer and the showstopper plate of a hot chocolate lava cake topped with cold vanilla ice cream!

‘As you can see, I have also added a couple more stuff, which I noticed Ginny and Mum eat during you know the time of the month, been told that those help ease the pain and cravings. And Ohh! I also have these…’ Fred handed you more stuff from the chair. ‘Heating pads and a couple of potions from Madam Pomfrey- though she was a bit annoyed and worried that I asked her for them so close to curfew…and’ His cheeks blushed. ‘after all that she calmed down cause she said that I was being the most caring boyfriend and knew that we would make a great couple…’ Fred chuckled nervously.

Seeing that you haven’t said anything, yet he continued hoping to salvage anything after that boyfriend/girlfriend comment, ‘apparently quite a number of teachers are shipping us together, some even have bets!’ He tried to sound nonchalant but failed. ‘Can you believe?’

Alternating from him, the food on the table and the heating pad and potions in your hand. You brain is going a hundred miles an hour.

On one hand, this is just wow, never had you felt so taken cared of before- and securely this surpasses best friend territory, right? Fred had gone above and beyond. This was some boyfriend material stuff right here. But what if you’re just overthinking and reading too between the lines y/n? What if you just want to see what you want to see. But your thoughts keep going back to the boyfriend quality worry, the going above and beyond. And he did mention that relationship comment right? He didn’t seem to take offence at the idea….

On the other hand, your own worry had taken over. What he had done for you was so risky, he could have been caught. If he had he would have suffered and have scars on his hand, all because of you and you could live with that. How could he be so reckless? – Wait why are you even still saying this to yourself…

You broke off your internal monologue. ‘WHAT THE FUCK FRED?!??? YES FREDDIE THIS IS ALL SO SWEET AND I REALLY DO APPRECIATE IT BUT WHAT IF YOU HAD BEEN CAUGHT?? YOU WOULD HAVE SUFFERED AND BE PUNISHED BY THE BLOOD QUILL!! HOW COULD YOU BE SO RECKLESS?!?’ Your anger from worry had slowed now, you looked up to him with soft eyes. ‘You did this all for me. If something bad had happen to you, it would because of me, and I don’t think I could live with that Freddie.’

Fred had always been able to see through you, and to see you so anxious for his safety warms his heart. He tucks the hair that had fallen out during you rant. ‘But you see love, I wasn’t caught. Reckless- Yes. But caught? Nope. Maybe I should try that again….to test my skills.’ He teased.

You glared at him. ‘You. Will. Not. Or else, I swear to God I’ll punch you.’

‘You can’t even reach my shoulder.’ Fred resorted. ‘You know… you are so cute when you’re frustrated.’

‘Ughh!’ Rolling your eyes. ‘I don’t know if I wanna kill you or kiss you.’

‘Rather kiss me more, I hope.’ He smirked. Then got serious., he held your waist. ‘But I wanna do it properly and take you out on a date first.’

You brought your hands up to the nape of his neck and started to play with his hair. ‘Well then let’s us consider this as our first date!’

---

Taglist [All/General]: @gruffle1

(omg I just noticed that tumblr tagged a different account 😳that have a similar username, just a letter off😳 this is why sometimes I don't trust tumblr's automatic tagging system! @blisfvll my bad😅)

#fred weasley x reader #fred weasley imagine #blisfvllswritingchallenge #fred weasley fluff #weasley x reader #harry potter x reader #weasley twins #fred and george #fred and george weasley #fandomscombine writes

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reallybadfeeling · 3 years

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My Obikin Playlist Masterpost

I'm gonna try to explain my reasoning, but you can give each song whatever interpretation you want. Also, use them however you want if any of them inspire you to make something creative.

(PS: Sorry for my ranting on the first song. I'm very passionate about it in particular.) (Tagging @imtryingsstuff because she asked for it. Even though I was already working on this post before she asked. I have way too much free time.)

☙ ✤ ❧ ☙ ✤ ❧ ☙ ✤ ❧ ☙ ✤ ❧ ☙ ✤ ❧ ☙ ✤ ❧

❧ Heart + Bones - Roisin O

I've tried to sit down and write this song out Feels like a thousand times But I was always too scare of what I might find But if I keep on blocking this pain out It might be too late To heal my heart somehow Don't wanna open that wound Don't wanna replay that night Don't wanna think about you You are no longer mine Don't wanna write you a love song When I know that love is gone 'Cause if I let myself think of you I might lose my mind It's the heart and bones It's an empty soul The dreams at night that shake me to my core And I can't get up off this floor It's in the bones of me An empty soul in me The dreams at night that shake me to my core I can't get off this floor [...] Don't wanna think about you When you're no longer mine Don't wanna write you a love song When I know this love is gone [...] The dreams at night that shake me to my core I just can't take this hurting anymore [...] Don't wanna think about you You are no longer mine Don't wanna write you a love song When I know this love is gone 'Cause if I let my mind think of you I might lose it all I've tries to sit down and write this song out Feels like a thousand times

A fair warning: each and every break-up song in this playlist is basically me crying at the idea of a very heart broken Obi-Wan post RotS alone on Tatooine. But for this song in particolar I mention the repetitions with the slight differences because in my eyes they are actually HUGE! The more the song goes on, the more Obi-Wan is spiraling! The way it specifically tells that the empty soul is his the second time, like he accepts that despite what Anakin did he still thinks there's a soul there to save, and the idea of not doing so makes his soul feel empty. And the switch from "get up off this floor" to "get off this floor", literally him being so desperate he stops thinking that he wants to get up (and the last time it literally becomes "i just can't take this hurting anymore", because Obi-Wan had to see so many people he loves die, he literally can't take any more breaking of his heart). The first "you are no longer mine" is the realization hitting him, but then it becomes "when you are no longer mine" and that feels like acceptance of that realization (but then later in the song it turns back to "you are no longer mine" like he's so desperate he wants to deny it once again, distance himself from it)! The switch from "that love" from "this love", like the first time he's thinking about how Anakin no longer loves him, but then realizes that no matter how much he still loves Anakin, there is actually nothing he can do about how everything is broken. But most of all the first time it's "if I let myself think of you I might lose my mind", which is Obi-Wan still being rational about things, or at least trying not to let his mind linger on the thought of Anakin; but then at the end it becomes "if I let my mind think of you I might lose it all", because he's already thinking about Anakin and he can't let his mind linger on it, otherwise he would realize how much he lost when he lost Anakin, which is everything. And the ending too, by repeating the start, but now it has a feeling of resignation to it, like at first he was literally scared to let himself linger on his feelings because he knew he would find heart break, but now he's just empty and at the same times he knows he'll feel like that a thousand times more, because he just can't let that hurt go, he can't let his love for Anakin be forgotten. ... I love this song and it shows. I mean, the playlist is literally named after it for a good reason. I swear I'll be less wordy for every other explanation.

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❧ Black Hole - Griff

It seems like things are going really well for you I wish that I could say the same about me too I wish that I could say the same [...] Without a trace You disappeared and took some of me with you, babe Like the way I used to laugh untile my belly ached Well, that's all gone away now And boy, you know I've tried to pray, I've bruised my knees I've tried to bring you back to me I've tried my best to find some kind of peace Don't you see? There's a big black hole where my heart used to be And I've tried my best to fill it up with things I don't need It don't work like that, no, it's not easy To fill this gap that you left in me

So, I see this as a song for an AU, maybe a Modern Au. Something basic like the two of them maybe being neighbors and Obi-Wan maybe being a tutor for Anakin when he was a teen, and Anakin having a huge crush on him. But then Obi-Wan marries and Anakin is heart broken. (Don't worry the idea is also that Obi-Wan gets a divorce and comes back to Anakin, but still, the song fits for the first part of this idea). But feel free to see whatever else you want in it.

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❧ Gone, Gone, Gone - Phillip Phillips

I'll lie, cheat, I'll beg and bride To make you well, to make you well When enemies are at your door I'll carry you away from war [...] Give me reasons to believe That you would do the same for me And I will do it for you, for you Baby, I'm not moving on I'll love you long after you're gone

This is honestly a classic. It would fit with any ship, but that line about lying, cheating, etc... That screams Anakin. Like, literally canon that he would do anything to keep the person he loves with him.

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❧ What You Talking About? - Peter Bjorn and John

You used to be my hero Now you're just another boss [...] Five years as your understudy When I can't understand what you talking about [...] Tell me lies and I will listen Tell the truth and I'll be gone Tell me why I need permission [...] Shining in your shadow How could I sink this low? Our acquaintance has been so-so And I can't understand where my patience's gone

These lyrics just give me very frustrated Anakin as a Padawan trying to navigate his relationship with Obi-Wan. Not very romantic or shippy, but still relevant in my opinion.

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❧ Bruci la città - Irene Grandi

(Let) The city burn down or live in fear (that) within two hours everything will disappear anything else will disappear [...] I can't stop (myself) from screaming That I hold you to my heart To protect you from evil That I wish I could soothe Your pain, your pain [...] (Let) The stars explode (Let) The whole thing explode (Let) Everything other than the two of us die At least for a little bit At least as a mistake [...] I want to get my act together Maybe be better And shield you with my heart From catastrophe and fear

Don't really know why, but this makes me think of a quiet moment in the middle of the Clone Wars, just Anakin and Obi-Wan alone in a tent, hoping to have a moment of peace in each other's arms. (If you want the full lyrics translated let me know, I just picked my favorite parts)

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❧ Atlantis - Seafret

We got here the hard way All those words that we exchange Is it any wonder things get dark? 'Cause it's in my heart, it's in my head I never take back the things I said [...] I can't save us My Atlantis, we fall We've built this town on shaky ground [...] Now all the birds have fled The hurt just leaves me scared Losing everything I've ever known It's all become too much Maybe I'm not built for love If I knew that I could reach you, I would go

SO MUCH OBI-WAN ANGST POST-ROTS! Like, the birds that have fled are the Jedi that survived Order 66, the things impossible to take back a reference to the entire conversation between Anakin and Obi-Wan during their duel... And the one thing that always breaks me: "maybe I'm not built for love", which makes me think about that "infinte sadness" thing that comes from one of the novels. *chef kiss*

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❧ No Time To Die - Billie Eilish

I should have known I'd leave alone Just goes to show That the blood you bleed is just the blood you owe We were a pair [...] You were my life, but like is far away from fair Was I stupid to love you? Was I reckless to help? Was it obvious to everybody else? That I'd fallen for a lie You were never on my side [...] I let it burn You're no longer my concern Faces from my past return Another lesson yet to learn

Don't know about you, but this always makes me think of a lonely and bitter Obi-Wan after RotS. There's also another way of reading this honestly. This could absolutely be Anakin spiraling at the end of RotS, convinced that Padmé doesn't love him anymore; and then Vader facing Luke (the face from the past returning) and realizing the one who always lied to him was Palpatine.

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❧ White Flag - Dido

I know I left too much mess and Destruction to come back again And I caused nothing but trouble I understand if you can't talk to me again And if you live by the rules of "it's over" Then I'm sure that that makes sense But I will go down with this ship And I won't put my hands up and surrender There will be no white flag above my door I'm in love and always will be And when we meet Which I'm sure we will All that was there Will be there still I'll let it pass And hold my tongue And you will think That I've moved on

There's no doubt that this song has been overused. And it is a very classic meme, so sometimes it's hard to take it seriously. But I still love it. And I can't help but relate this to something with Vader trying to redeem himself but failing at that too, and his and Obi-Wan's relationship still being broken as fuck.

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❧ Fight the End - The playground

When it's all falling apart I'll be the one who can hold you Console you When everything's getting dark And you can't find the spark To get through I'll fight for you till the end Whatever's broken I'll mend For you If you think it's all gone Just breathe in and hold on Till the end of time

Once again, just some H/C during the Clone Wars kind vibes, but also good for an apocalypse AU of some kind.

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❧ Hanging On A Lie - Striking Matches

I'm not mentioning a specific part of this song, because the entire thing in my head is just the whole journey of Anakin turning to the Dark Side and then turning back to the Light right before he died. Seriously, up until the first chorus, it's just Anakin talking about what he feels like about Padmé's supposed betrayal. ("Baby you've been up to something / don't you tell me it's not what it looks like" but also "I might have been naive but I'm not blind" and "Don't you know you should know better than this / Than to cover up the truth with your poisonous lips/I'm not falling for it this time"). The second half of the song is Vader facing Luke. ("I'll be the one who got away from you when you / finally figure it out / you won't find me"). And the last part is Vader realizing all the lies Palpatine told him all alon. ("I'm not fallin' for it this time/try and try too little too late" and again the "you should know better than this/than to cover up the truth with you poisonous lips") A bit of a weird interpretation, that's for sure. But look at me making a song about cheating all about Anakin's journey!

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❧ Bloodsport '15 - Raleigh Ritchie

Your love is worth it and for that I will wait And though you hate me when you have a turn I drive you crazy, but you always return [...] Although you love me, sometimes we're mean Things can get ugly, but we're still a team We are an army that breaks from withing but That's why we're stronger and that's how we'll win [...] I've got your back, and though it's stacked against us I've got your hand, it's us against consensus And I will burn the people who hurt you the worst and I will no learn Cause I am too young and too dumb to consider the terms of breaking the law And I'll curse the day that they return With a smile on my face as their heads hit the floor And they're done, now it's curtains, the bloodlust's a clusterfuck, it hurts but it's working And even if you ask me to stop, it's too late because I've already decided their fate It's not a distaste, it's pure hate and it pulsates and it works its way around my brain Anyway, what I'm trying to say is I'll protect you till the day I meet my maker So don't fight me now cause you might need me later Loving you is a bloodsport Fighting in a love war It's not what I'm in love for, I'm yours I don't know if you can help it, maybe I'm just being selfish

Soooo, basically Anakin doing to Obi-Wan what he did to Padmé: loving him so much he thinks he has to turn to the Dark Side to save him. The first part I can almost imagine said by Obi-Wan, actually. Like, he's aware that sometimes Anakin hates their dynamics, but also that they are both in love... Which just ends with total madness.

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❧ Sweet Love of Mine - Joy Williams

I was broken, I was blind Lost in a moment I thought I left behind Then you woke up this dark soul of mine Carrying a light I thought I'd never find When you found me, I was all alone The whole world around me, but nowhere to call home I heard your voice sing like heaven's choir Gathered up my fears and threw them in the fire

I'm well aware this song is about pregnancy and how the singer found herself in the experience of becoming a mother. BUT, hear me out: what about an AU with either one of them being a Sith and the other one is still a Jedi. Instead of fighting each other, the Jedi tries to save the Sith, because they realize that the Sith actually never had a chance to be anything else since they grew up with a Sith as their "parent" and Master. But if we still want to keep the pregnancy element, fuck it! It's perfect for an Omegaverse AU, with Anakin maybe about to fall when he finds out he's pregnant and that is how Obi-Wan and their unborn child save Anakin. (Is this very specific? Yes. Do I care? Nope, and that's why this song made it into the playlist.)

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❧ Senza fare sul serio - Malika Ayane

There's a post on my blog already about why this song makes me think about the Jedi Order in general. I know I should probably keep it in a different playlist. Alas, it's still here. Have a link to my previous post if you are interested on reading a complete translation and the explanation of my reasoning. HERE!

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❧ Conversations in the Dark - John Legend

I will never try to change you, change you I will always want the same you, same you Swear on everything I pray to That I won't break your heart I'll be there when you get lonely, lonely Keep the secrets that you told me, told me And your love is all you owe me And I won't break your heart [...] And we, we got places we both gotta be But there ain't nothing I would rather do Then blow off all my plans for you

It's just such a lovely love song, I couldn't help myself. This seriously gives me sappy Obi-Wan vibes in any way, shape or form.

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❧ If You Ever Leave, I'm Coming With You - The Wombats

You know I'll do Whatever you want me to [...] Take you out of this You reluctant optimist And if you ever leave, I'm coming with you Stuck to the gum that's stuck on your shoe If you ever leave, I'm coming with you [...] Am I losing you in the dark baby? No more breaking stuff No more acting up Filling your head with doubt

A song about the obsessive kind of love that hints of a way too dependent relationship? Something that mentions losing themselves in the dark? Of fucking course I relate this to Anakin and the way he loves people!

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❧ Transplant - Sea Girls

You're breaking all the promises tonight I'm always dancing by myself as the music plays I'm always one step behind, off-beat, out of place Now I'm looking for you, you're looking away [...] Your heart changed Mine stayed the same I don't recognize your voice when you're saying my name Your heart changed And mine beats the same way [...] Wish I could be back in the moment We were shining, we were making mistakes 'Til your heart changed Mine stayed the same

Have I mentioned that I have a lot of RotS feels? Yeah, so, in my head the "dancing" works like an analogy to fighting and the "music" is literally the sound of battle. Which is why this fits perfectly as far as I'm concerned. An even the "always one step behind" part is just Obi-Wan not realizing Anakin was slowly turning to the Dark Side. But it can be related also to how Anakin basically felt like he didn't truly belong with the Jedi.

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❧ Read my Mind - JONES

Can't control my thoughts But I'm trying every day [...] But sometimes I want impossible things When you hear my voice, what does it say? Need a language, we're lost in translation From impossible thoughts and feelings Why don't you know before I know? What I need to say, before I can How come you don't have the answer Before I asked you the question? Wish you could read my mind [...] It's been a long time since we've been together In the same world, just want you to look at me Like I was everything you ever wanted again [...] Just hold me like I'm everything you wanted again

A good song of the two people pining will always make me think of those two dorks. And their feeling are definitely lost in translation even in canon, with Anakin never realizing how much Obi-Wan actually cares for him because of Palpatine's manipulations.

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❧ So Much It Hurts - Niki & The Dove

Oh, I ask you where you've been 'Cause you always come home late nowadays What a fool was I to think we were safe From the thieves in the temple [...] Oh, won't you bring it back? After all that we've been through together Is it now you gonna throw it all away? Oh, a love like ours Tell me, was it worth it? Oh, the thieves in the temple Oh, but you said that For better for worse You would always be there for me Always be there for me Always be there for me like I'll always be there for you Good times and bad times

So this screams Padmé being cheated on. Like, Anakin still married to her, yet he is always sneaking away after they spend time together to be in the Temple with Obi-Wan. Like, Obi-Wan is literally the thief in the Temple that steals Anakin away from her. (Which I'm sure is actually a metaphor for how the couples' marriage is the temple and someone is disrespecting it by taking away the other's lover. But look at me making this literal, 'cause why not!).

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❧ Power & Control - Marina

Give a little, get a lot That's just how you are with love [...] Think you're funny, think you're smart Think you're gonna break my heart Think you're funny, think you're smart Yeah, you may be good looking But you're not a piece of art [...] Power and control I'm gonna make you fall I'm gonna make you fall We give and take a little more 'Cause all my life I've been controlled You can't have peace without a war

Another song for an AU, this time one with both of them being Sith, most likely being enemies too at first. Before they decide to work together against Anakin's Master.

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❧ No Hero - Elisa

Don't you shut your eyes And hide you heart behind a shadow 'Cause you can count on me As long as I can breathe [...] I've fallen from grace Yeah, I'm much less a saint than a sinner Oh, no I ain't no superhuman 'Cause that's just in the movies, I know But I'll carry you throught the night Through the storm Give you love, always love in return I can't jump over buildings I'm no hero But love can do miracles I can't outrun a bullet 'Cause I'm no hero But I would take one for you [...] 'Cause I'm no hero But I'd spill my blood for you If you need me to I'll be there

Another song from an Italian artist, but this one is in English! And I totally see this song for a scenario where one of the two isn't a Jedi or even for a Modern AU. But it can totally work for Canon compliant too because Anakin is the one every calls hero with no fear. It fits then if Obi-Wan tells Anakin that he doesn't feel like a hero, but he would do anything for Anakin.

☙ ✤ ❧ ☙ ✤ ❧ ☙ ✤ ❧ ☙ ✤ ❧ ☙ ✤ ❧ ☙ ✤ ❧

SOOOO, this post is getting way to long (like, it was way too long even just with the first song). And I made it to an even 20 songs. I feel like this a nice place to stop for now. Don't worry, these are just the first 20. I have more in my private playlist, but I want to make another post like this when I add them to the public one. Because I can. And that's what I'm gonna do.

#obikin #obikin playlist #star wars #obi wan kenobi #anakin skywalker #if you do anything with these song please TAG ME!#I wanna know!#i get very emotional for heart + bones #it's one of my favorite song ever #the subtle poetry of it gets to me every single time #that is THE break up song #fight me over it #maybe I should have made a single post about it #that would have been smarter #oh well #also sorry for the truly terrible icon #i have no photoshop skill whatsoever #Spotify

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bookofmirth · 3 years

Note

I'm not up to date with all the drama in this fandom bc i tend to scroll past it. But being a reader of the books before I landed in these fandoms, I'm utterly shocked about how people treat eachother.

I'm very neutral on this stupid ship war going on. I tend to fall more for Elriel. But I understand everyone's opinion. I used to read all the book analysis, but now it just seems so exhausting. I get that people love books and ship different people. That's normal, everyone has different taste etc i'm just here trying to understand why we need to bring other human beings down in order to push our own narrative.

Since when is it okay to do that???? Can't we have a normal conversation without sending death treats?

I normally don't really respond to anything that involves drama. But these last couples of months have gotten me to dislike the books more and more solely because of these, may I call them blandly, horrible people.

And i'm very sad to have to admit that i'm also getting sick of the art of the multiple ships. Which that's horrible because I love what all these amazing artists create. But the hate they receive and the comments just make me hate it all more,this whole fandom with all these toxic people ruining it for me personally.

Can't we all just agree that we like these books, and respect eachother as human beings, no matter what everyone else thinks? And maybe wait and see what the author writes? In the end it are still her books and she will have the final say in everything.

I wish SJM would release the next book sooner so all this hate would stop, then again i don't know if it will stop. They will likely continue and probably bother SJM too...

Thank you for listening to me ranting, you always seem very nice to people with different opinions, so I thought i might as well rant a bit too.

Have a lovely day!!

Hello! Thank you for this message! I think it's really helpful for people to see because they can see the impact of the things they are doing and saying in the fandom. There are a lot of people who feel comfortable being vocal in the fandom, but I gotta say, if I were just joining now, I'm not sure that would be me. I wonder how many people walk in, take a look around, and walk the fuck back out. I probably would.

I got on my soap box a little bit because I was thinking about some of the things you've said!

I was just talking with some friends, some of whom I've been in the fandom with since 2017, some who are newer. And we all 1000% agree with you. It's so, so frustrating that the fandom has gotten so nasty to the point where we've become so separated from each other that we can't have a single civil conversation. Where people of color don't feel safe, and where a lot of the fandom doesn't even seem to care about that.

When I first joined the fandom, there were definitely people who shipped one way and people who shipped another, but we were still able to have conversations with each other. There would be these really, really long posts that were chains of people commenting on posts and reblogging, then someone adding on their thoughts, then op would respond, etc. Yeah, the posts were super long to scroll through, but there was so much engagement, ya know? And it was genuine, too. We could disagree or say "hey OP I like this point, but have you thought of X?" And it was great! (I even have a tag for it, #long post tag, because I once got an anon who was annoyed at how long my conversations with people would be 💀so I made that tag for people who wanted to block those posts.)

I'm not going to pretend it was perfect - there were definitely people I didn't get along with. But that wasn't a fandom thing, that was just a personality thing. And I never in a million years expected those people to fly off the handle and start attacking me anon, or to ss my posts to make fun of elsewhere. Now, that's a constant fear hanging over everyone's heads.

It has created an extreme echo chamber. I would genuinely like having those old fandom discussions where people would comment - in the open, on reblogs - and then we could all engage in that discussion in public. Now, all of that discussion happens in private, in groupchats and Discord. And don't get me wrong, Discord is super fun. But it also means that 1) people who aren't in those groups have no idea wtf is going on when we vague, although I try not to do that anyway, and 2) when people are in those groups they egg each other on to be worse and worse. Worse than they would have been if they were on their own and didn't feel like they had a group of people there to support their asshole behavior. tbh, I have to check myself sometimes and think, "would I do this if I hadn't just gotten into a rant conversation with friends on Discord?"

And what you said about fan art, it's so frustrating!!! Since when did fan art become a battle ground??? Since when did the appearance of fan art = a win for one ship or the other?? Why can't the comments of those arts ever just be nice and appreciative of the work someone has put into it? Honestly, it makes me paranoid to write fanfic, too! I mean, is that next???

I totally agree with you that we should be able to respect each other as people. We used to be able to do that. I hate to admit it, but I have so many people blocked now because I just don't trust them. I don't trust them to be civil, I don't trust them to be able to see my posts, I don't trust them to even read what I've written without misconstruing everything I've said.

I'm not sure if people realize that there is a big difference between this:

I don't like X ship

And this:

People who like X ship are delusional

The first one is okay! It's normal! Like you said, we all have feelings and interpretations and stuff we would prefer to see or not see!

The second one, not okay! Stop insulting people, people!!!!

The idea of engaging in a normal, healthy debate with a huge portion of the fandom is such a foreign concept to me at this point, and it never used to be. There could be a lot of reasons for this. And I always try to avoid pointing fingers because I know that not everyone is like that, though I'm sure I have slipped into that from time to time.

I think it would help if we stop seeing each other as a gwynriel or an elucien or an elriel, and start seeing each other as individuals. When acosf first came out, I started noticing a trend where people would send me asks and write them as if they were writing to every single person who ships elucien, or as if they were writing to every single person who holds a certain opinion about Azriel. It was really confusing at first, and I'm gonna request that the fandom stop doing that altogether, to everyone. If you want to engage with someone, engage with that person, not your idea of who they are and what they think.

I'm down for conversations where we talk about the series and what might come next as possibilities, because that's all this is, so far. Anyone who says that "X thing will never happen" is making some bold claims, and it's really off-putting to people who know that that's not why we are here. It's not a contest where we "win" canon. It's fandom, where we talk about what we like and what we don't like and what we want and cross our fingers and hope.

EDIT I wanted to add on one thing - a lot of this behavior is incredibly shocking and disgusting and I think that we, as a fandom, need to be better at 1) calling it out, and 2) not assuming that whoever did X horrible thing represents all people from that corner of the fandom.

I hope that you have a lovely day as well! And that the fandom doesn't get you too down. @heleencollier

#acotar fandom #acotar #acosf #fandom wank #leslie being a fandom grandma again

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plaidbooks · 3 years

Text

Nicknames and Slumps - “The Big Leagues” baseball AU

(moodboard by @witches-unruly-heart)

A/N: Here’s chapter 2 of the Baseball AU! I know I mentioned some chapters going towards the Summer Bingo--and they will--but I wanted to establish Sonny in this universe a little bit, first. This chapter takes place in the off season, and the beginning to Sonny’s second season of pitching for the Mets. Like before, feel free to DM me any questions you have about baseball/the AU!

Also, shoutout to @thatesqcrush and her husband for answering my arbitrary Mets questions!

P.S. Aquafresh is a brand of toothpaste

Tags: yelling, otherwise none

Words: 1803

Taglist: @witches-unruly-heart @beccabarba @thatesqcrush @itsjustmyfantasyroom @permanentlydizzy @ben-c-group-therapy @infiniteoddball @glowingmess @whimsicallymad @lv7867 @storiesofsvu @cycat4077 @alwaysachorusgirl @glimmerglittergirl @joanofarkansass @redlipstickandblacktea @reading--mermaid @averyhotchner @mrsrafaelbarba @detective-giggles @crowleysqueenofhell @dreamlover31

Sonny’s first year in the majors was almost flawless. Outside of his perfect game in his sixth start, he was dominate; he kept his ERA hovering around the low 1.00’s, and he was still undefeated. He did, however, have a few no decisions, only two of which were his fault. But besides that, he was the star everyone talked about. He even won the Rookie of the Year award; something almost unheard of with pitchers. The Cy Young award shocked no one, and the Mets were frantically offering him more money, trying to keep him. As if he’d go anywhere else.

Even with his spectacular pitching, the Mets didn’t make it to the post-season. But as the Mets watched the World Series from their homes, all anyone could talk about was the kid, Sonny Carisi.

He had gained notoriety among sportscasters and journalists for his outstanding performance on the field. But the fans adored him for his off days, and for how he conducted himself off the field. Not only did Sonny donate most of his time in the off season—not to mention his money—to multiple volunteer organizations, but he also offered to do signings at small, struggling mom and pop shops for free. He’d bring in huge crowds, spending hours at these events, taking pictures, signing autographs, talking to kids and adults alike.

While in the ballpark, on days he pitched, he would do his workouts in the trainer’s room, coming out of the dugout just to throw in the bullpen. He was focused, working on his mechanics. But on days he didn’t pitch, he was one of the first out on the field. Sonny had a penchant for hanging out right next to the dugout, signing autographs and taking pictures. He never declined—unless the umpire was yelling at him to get off the field so they could start the game—and he had a blast. And when he was in the outfield, shagging balls during batting practice, he’d toss them up to the crowd, or give them to kids with a huge smile.

Sonny’s trademark smile earned him his first nickname: Aquafresh. He threw his head back and laughed when he first heard it, loving it. He wasn’t as fond of his other nicknames that sprung up afterwards: Stringbean and Earthworm Jim being his least favorites. But there was one that apparently was going around that he didn’t hear from the crowd.

*************************

It was early morning, and he was watching the postgame wrap from the night before while he ate breakfast. Normally, Sonny didn’t watch the pre- or postgame commentary. But since he started dating you, he made it a point to watch if you were on. He smiled as he saw you wearing his jersey, thinking you were too damn cute, and wanting to cuddle with you on the couch.

The conversation slowly shifted from the game that happened to Sonny, as it normally did…not because you forced them to talk about him. In fact, you did your job as normal; it was your cohosts that would change the subject to him. And now that they knew—the world knew—that you two were dating, he almost wondered if it was on purpose, to see if you slip up on some personal info about him, or you two together.

“Speaking of Carisi, have you heard the new nickname? I heard the Staten Island Little Leaguers came up with it,” one of the guys said.

Sonny watched your face light up. “I have! They call him Peanut Butter Cup, right?” you asked, though he knew you didn’t need to; you never said anything that you couldn’t back up.

“Peanut Butter Cup? Where did they get that from?” another of your colleagues wondered out loud.

You smiled, and Sonny felt a swell of pride at your knowledge. “From his last name. They went from Carisi to Risi, then to Reese, then Reese’s and bam! Peanut Butter Cup,” you explained.

Sonny laughed, flushing with embarrassment, his heart warm. Children called him Peanut Butter Cup. Not for the first time, he felt an intense longing; Sonny wanted children, wanted a family. He was only 22, but he had known most of his life that he wanted to be a father. He made a mental note to bring up the prospect of children with you. It was still early in your relationship; you’ve been dating about five months, but with your jobs, you rarely saw each other. Hell, you saw each other more at work than off the field. Your relationship was mostly over text or phone calls, but he still felt deeply about you. He wasn’t sure if it was love yet, but he was hoping to get to know you more in person in the off season.

Once he finished breakfast, Sonny sent you a text: I saw your show from last night.

You responded almost instantly, unsurprising to him; your whole livelihood was on your phone. And? Did I do well?

He smiled, heart fluttering; he liked that you valued his opinion. Fantastic. Just one thing.

What??

I hate peanut butter.

***********************

Sonny Carisi was named the Opening Day starter for the Mets, shocking absolutely no one. He had just turned 23 and was already the best pitcher for the club, maybe even in baseball at the moment. Or so he, and everyone who watched him, thought. But that first game, the Cubs lit him up. Sonny gave up more runs in that game than he had in any other start combined. His manager took him out in the 4th, something that’s never happened to him before. When Sonny pitched, he was normally a shoo-in for at least 7 innings.

Frustrated, Sonny sat hard on the bench, not letting anyone outside the pitching coach talk to him.

“It happens to everyone eventually, Carisi. Just gotta let this roll off your back, come back strong your next outing.”

But that next outing, he did worse. He didn’t know what was happening to him. His command was perfect, his stuff great. It’s like everyone he faced suddenly could see right through him, knew every pitch he was going to throw before he threw it. It was infuriating. His ERA ballooned up to the 5.00’s, and he wondered dimly if the Mets would trade him.

Sonny eventually started shutting everyone out. He even stopped watching the pre- and postgame shows, whether you were on it or not. He stopped reading the articles you wrote, and he stopped reaching out. He even stopped being the first out of the dugout, stopped signing things by the dugout. On his days off, he spent it hiding in the locker room until game time. He didn’t want to field the questions about what was wrong with him; he didn’t have an answer, for them or himself.

************************

“Sonny, please open the door,” you called, knocking on the front door to his loft. He’d been avoiding you, and you worried about him.

You heard the latch unlock and took a step back. Sonny opened the door, looking annoyed. “What do you want?”

“I want to make sure my boyfriend is okay. Can I come in, please?” you asked. You knew he was frustrated, and that this may be something you’d have to deal with while dating. And you planned to force yourself into his life, to help him as best you could, whether he wanted to shut you out or not.

Sonny scoffed, turning and walking into his home. But he left the door open, and you followed, closing it behind you. “Of course, I’m not okay! Haven’t you been watching?”

“You know I have been. So, you’re in a slump; it happens—”

“Not to me!” he yelled, throwing his hands in the air.

You took a breath, staying calm. “It was bound to happen, babe.” You tried to put a comforting hand on his shoulder, but he shrugged you off.

“So, what? You’re going to side with those other analysts? Calling me a fluke and writing shitty articles about me?”

You flinched at the accusatory tone in his voice. “Of course, not—”

“Why not? Everyone else is doing it; I’m sure your bosses would eat it up.”

You sighed, trying to shove down your own defensiveness. “Would you please just listen to me for a moment?” He shot you a glare but didn’t speak up. “You know I analyze pitching for a living, right?”

“So? I’ve tried to make my fastball faster, tried to make my curve drop more, but I can’t—”

“Sonny,” you said softly, making him stop his rant. “Instead of trying to blow pitches passed batters, you should be working more on your mechanics and command. If batters are making contact, then make that work for you. Force grounders or popups, trust your defense to back you up; they’re there for a reason.”

His eyes scanned yours as he took in your words. “Th-that’s a great idea, actually….”

“I’m glad you think so,” you replied, smiling.

Sonny returned your grin. “I—I’m sorry for snapping at you,” he sighed heavily. “I just…I don’t know what’s changed between last season and now—”

“You’re not new anymore; teams can break down your pitching style. You won a Cy Young and Rookie of the Year; they’re all so threatened by you that they all probably studied the hell out of you.”

He nodded, feeling a little better with your praise. “Y-yeah….”

You reached up, cupping his face, making him look at you. “There’s nothing wrong with you or your pitching. The batters just stepped up their game. So now, you have to answer back, okay?”

He lifted a hand, placing it on top of yours, and turned his face in your hold, pressing his lips to your palm. “Thank you, doll. And again, I’m sorry for yelling—”

“It’s fine, Sonny. I understand that you’re frustrated,” you said, smiling.

He squeezed your hand. “It’s not fine; you’re just trying to help. I should listen to you more; you’re so smart, and not to mention beautiful. I promise to never snap at you again.”

Your smile grew, and you lifted to your tiptoes, giving him a tender kiss. He leaned down, deepening the kiss. He wrapped his arms around your back, pulling you flush against him, and you hummed into his mouth. Slowly, he pulled back, leaning his forehead against yours, rubbing his nose with yours.

“Just so you know, I’ve never, and will never, write a shitty article about you, or call you a fluke, Stringbean,” you muttered against his lips.

Sonny let out a chuckle. “You know, you’re the only person who can call me that to my face, and not have me get annoyed.”

You giggled, pressing your lips to his once more. And sure enough, his next start had him looking back to normal, except instead of striking out double digits, he forced grounders for eight scoreless innings.

#sonny carisi x reader #law and order svu #law and order svu fanfic #fanfic #my writing #the big leagues au #baseball!au #baseball!sonny

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nafeary · 3 years

Text

“Sun and Moon”

⚬ Pairing: Leonardo da Vinci/Reader

⚬ Characters: Reader, Leo, Comte, and Mozart

⚬ Word Count: 1.3k

⚬ Genre: Fluff, but also a lil bit of Leo being an edgelord

⚬ Warnings: none

⚬ Event: 500 Follower Milestone Celebration [Requests Closed]

✧✎ Prompt/s: Requested by @nishtharya

4. “You’re like the moon.” “Didn’t you say I was hot?”

14. “Gossip and cuddles? “Gossip and cuddles.”

✧✎ A/N: haha, did I say flashfics haha uhm... I’m sorry, but im physically unable to write things without plot, it seems. I hope you enjoy this regardless 💜💜💜 take care everyone, and drink water!

Snowflakes were brimming the edge of your wool hat, your fingertips numb and stiff as you pulled your mantle tight around yourself. Impatient footsteps were stamped across the white ground of Comte’s mansion, evidence of you foul mood. Things had been difficult enough, especially with the mansion’s butler having fallen sick, and now a vexing encounter with some disparaging men at weekly market had left you intensely frustrated.

As you huffed a billow of your breath into the air, you spotted the le Comte conversing with Leonardo, the latter rather apparent in showing his apathy. Your eyes met across the distance, molten gold slowly enrapturing your senses—they’ve always had the ability to annihilate even the most stubborn of negative emotions, yet you couldn’t help your frustration at the period-typical misogyny you had had to face.

Your lover promptly turned back to his friend, giving him a friendly pat on his shoulder before sauntering over to you. Le Comte nodded your way before disappearing inside the mansion.

“So,” you began once he stopped in front of your form, resisting the urge to wrap your arms around him and rubbing your icy fingers together in an attempt to spark some warmth. “what were you two talking about?”

“Nothing too important, cara mia.” He’s apparently taken notice of your shivers, warmth spread across your skin, when he clasped your hands in his; then, he started to squeeze them, kneading your skin with his thumbs until you felt the uncomfortable stiffness gradually wear off.

He brought your hands close to his face, pursed his saccharine lips, and started to blow on them. A sensation fizzled to life in your lower tummy, akin to a hearty soup warming you from the inside.

Leo guided your threaded hands to his chest while gazing at you beneath his dense lashes. “He merely informed me that the ball tonight was canceled.”

Ah... the ball. A friend of le Comte’s had invited Mozart to play at that ball—which would have been tonight—and the master of the mansion insisted on his attendance. Society and tradition invariably got their way, thus causing you to be appointed as his entourage. None of you were elated at this development, and you were certain that Leo was reluctant to let you attend a ball as someone else’s sweetheart... pretend or not.

But he’d kept quiet, enjoining you to enjoy yourself while requesting Mozart to look out for you. As much as you appreciated his consideration, you had contemplated the decision to attend regardless—but the occurrences today had officially soiled your mood.

“I see... truth be told, I wasn’t in the mood to hang around nobles, anyway.” And truly, you’d much rather curl up beneath your lover’s blanket, asking Leo whether he could whip up that minestrone that was the epitome of soul food. Perhaps even telling him about those men’s revolting views.

Bits of snow began to powder his ashen hair, reflecting the light of the moon as they slowly melted. The frosty flakes in stark contrast to his calming expression, they prompted you to lift the corner of your lips, not wanting to look too cold and mad under his warm gaze. “I see. Is there anything you’d like to do, mia principessa?”

He shed his mantle, gently pulling it over your shoulders in a graceful arch. “Gossip and cuddles?” You hated how needy you sounded, yet there was no use concealing the desire to spend time with your beau. Leonardo would waste no time figuring out your hidden emotions, either way.

“Gossip and cuddles, it is.”

“—and they had the audacity to tell me that I ought to cover my cleavage further over the day. What’s the point of doing that if evening wear shows of racks left and right, anyway?”

You’d been ranting about the ways of the 19th century for a good hour now. In between a few tears of vexation—especially looking back on the more hurtful comments they’d thrown your way—and plenty furious curses here and there, Leonardo had prepared you some minestrone. After only a couple of spoons, you could already feel the crease in between your eyebrows subsiding.

Now, his arms were protectively wound around your stomach, molding the marbles of your spine against his chest. Being the big spoon was his favourite thing, that much he’d admitted. Not that you were complaining, of course—the warmth his hugs shared was incomparable. “Thank you for listening to me. I’m sorry if I bored you.”

“Nonsense,” he whispered in response, pressing his soft lips against the shell of your ear, and continued peck after peck until he reached your temple. “They had know right judging you based on your appearance.”

A comfortable silence fell over the two of you, the only sound disturbing the peace resounding from the little cocoon Lumiere had curled herself into, adorable quiet mewling making you simper from ear to ear.

You recalled the earlier fortunate events, halting at the sheer convenience. Pursing your lips in thought, you were more than certain that Leonardo must have asked Comte to excuse yourself from the activity upon seeing your distress—he could read you like no other, after all. He must have already known to your desire not to attend the festivities.

“You know, Leo? You’re like the moon, in some ways.”

He playfully nibbled your ear, prompting you to flinch in surprise, vermillion staining your cheeks. “Didn’t you say I was hot? Just yesterday, you were claiming that in between your pretty gasps—”

Swiftly, you turned around, lightly pinching his arms in the process. “I get it. Let me talk.” As serious as you were trying to come across, you couldn’t help a few giggles from slipping past your mouth, his wide-eyed expression, and that surprised pout lacing his lips, just too satisfactory.

“You’re always incredibly attentive and caring. No matter what, you never fail to watch over your loved ones, just like the moon never fails to guide us through darkness.” Just the way he immediately got to work to make you feel better, without ever having been asked to do so, filled you with a sense of belonging.

Your stare fluttered past the window revealed by the drapes, the moonlight sparkling in alabaster droplets that poured from the kohl sky.

“Beyond that, you never reveal your true intentions—even if you’re directly called out, you just... manage to stay in the shadows without ever admitting that you were looking out for someone.” You’ve gotten used to your lover’s innovative ways—both in helping people out, and hiding that that’s what he was assaying to achieve.

“And you shine so so bright, Leonardo. Especially when you choose to step into your moonlight, celebrating with the people around you instead of merely watching them live from the shadows.” At this point, you were aware that your were trailing off, the cogs in your mind turning slower and slower, as though they were treading through syrup.

Slowly, his body began to respond to your admittedly embarrassing musings, yet his eyes were the last thing you managed to focus on before succumbing to your exhaustion, a stunning gold that beheld you as if you were his greatest treasure.

As you let your head fall onto his chest, he could feel his unconscious slipping to and fro like an ocean tide as he whispered a honeyed, “ti amo, cara mia,” into the tangles of your hair, the universe never seeming so in orbit.

“If I am indeed the moon, you are the sun—so bright, I’m afraid I might appear to tenebrous.”

Tag List of the most wonderful sweethearts (just message me if you’d like to be added <3): @juminly @kisara-16 @sweetlittlemouse @thesirenwashere @nad-zeta @delicateikemenmemes

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raunchyom · 3 years

Text

Vices, Not Virtues: Kindness

[ Chapter 3 ]

[ Previous ] [ Next ]

A/N: Surprise! Wasn’t planning to have this out on Levi’s birthday, but also wasn’t planning that hiatus. School, amirite? On the plus side, I’ll officially be free by May 1, at which point I can start updating this (semi-) regularly again, so look forward to it! Tagging: @devintrinidad // @dweeb-central

word count: 2.7k || warnings: n/a

Listening to Leviathan rant was pretty much something that came with the territory of being his friend.

Whether about anime, his brothers, video games, anime, school, socializing, normies… oh, and don’t forget anime. There was always something on his mind, and his severely limited social circle meant you were often the recipient of his rants. Today in particular, it spanned a lot of different topics. Your recent absence hadn’t gone unnoticed, and the way he was going on made it seem like he’d bottled up every single emotion over the past few days and shoved them into a box labelled ‘re-open for Mc.’

Not that you loved him any less for it, of course. Poor Levi really couldn’t catch a break, and he was so excited to have someone like you who really cared about him-- well, who could blame him for wanting to open up?

Over the past week in particular, he’d been subjected to the usual trauma around the house. Apparently, he’d had Asmo and Satan gang up on him about never leaving the house, even the bookworm agreeing that Levi was too far gone. Mammon had ‘borrowed’ something of his, only for it to never return. Levi knew it was a bad idea every time, but he was too easily won over by promises of his investments being worth it. The last Akuzon delivery was supposed to be a limited edition maid-cafe-style Ruri-chan figurine, that smelled like her bean-cake best friend Azuki-tan-- which, of course, meant that Beel took a bite out of the package before Levi could get there to stop him. Lucifer had lectured him about grades, saying that he knew Levi could do better, if only he stopped playing video games so much-- “as if that’s a compliment!”

Levi finally stopped pacing, rolling his eyes at the mere memory of it. He glanced down to where you sat, perched on the side of his tub.

It wasn’t the most comfortable seat in the house, but his room wasn’t exactly made for visitors; you had to make do when you were there for a rant. He’d generally start talking while playing a video game, then gradually pause it, turn around, and eventually stand up and act out his frustrations. It was better for you to just start off seated on the side of his tub, that way he would have an aquarium backdrop for when he inevitably paced in front of you. It gave you a nicer view from the start, and when he wanted to sit again, he could choose to pull up his gaming chair or, if he was feeling particularly bold, sit down next to you.

As if he heard your thoughts, Levi plopped down next to you with a frustrated sigh. “Ugh, they totally don’t deserve to have you helping them all the time.” He grumbled, almost as if talking to himself. “I mean, I don’t either. I don’t know why you spend so much time around some gross otaku. And listen to all my problems, and--”

“Levi, it’s fine.” You assured him, “I don’t mind; we’re friends.”

Levi glanced at you from the corner of his eye, as if he didn’t believe you. He shifted his gaze back to the fish tank in front of him and continued, “Still, I know I’m always venting to you, and…”

The lack of eye contact didn’t prevent him from seizing up in your presence. You could practically see the buffering symbol in his brain, mouth wavering as he tried to force the words out. His face was getting red just from knowing your eyes were on him, somehow feeling as if every moment you waited politely for him to continue was a moment of pure torture.

“You don’t ever talk to me.” He mumbled. The words slurred together, as if he could barely convince himself to enunciate the syllables. He fumbled with the cord of his headphones and his stare shifted to the floor. Even eye contact with the fish must’ve been too much.

“We talk all the time.” You sounded much less sure than you felt, probably more out of hurt than anything. Did your friendship not mean as much as you thought it did?

“That’s not what I--!” Levi frowned harder, tugging more incessantly at his headphones. He huffed out a frustrated breath, knowing what he wanted to say but not how to say it. “You do talk to me, but… you listen to me a lot more…”

“So… you want me to talk more?” Levi was usually pretty easy to read. Sure, he didn’t say his emotions outright, but they were often written all over his face. In times like this though, when he was stuttering and refusing to make eye contact even more than normal, he wasn’t quite as transparent.

“No! Well, I mean, yes, but not-- I meant-- why don’t you ever ask?” Levi finally blurted out, surprising you both. “...for help? Why don’t you ever ask for help?”

“Uh… what?” Well, this was out of nowhere. You were supposed to be listening to his problems, but now he was upset that you hadn’t brought up yours? Was there some part of his rant that you were supposed to cut into with your own?

“I notice, around the house, and RAD, and-- and everywhere. You never let people help you with things. You never ask for it yourself, even when you need it.” After a second, his eyes widened. “Not-- Not that I watch you! I-It’s nothing weird like that! I-I’m gross, and an otaku, and-- b-but-- I don’t st-stalk you or anything!”

It was funny, watching Levi dig his own grave deeper. On the one hand, it was amusing to hear Levi desperately try to explain away any potential misinterpretation, but it was mixed with a fair amount of confusion about what his point was supposed to be. Your face must have portrayed this in some way, or at least one of these two emotions, because a cursory glance from Levi had him forcing himself back on track before he could say anything worse.

“I mean, I get why you don’t want my help. I-I’m just some yucky otaku, who’s anti-social and um, probably couldn’t help with anything anyway.” Levi was really good at kicking himself while he was down. Given, he always seemed to be down, and he always seemed to be kicking himself.

“Levi, that’s not why...” The words fell away halfway through your sentence, having caught yourself before admitting to anything.

“So why?” You may have caught yourself before admitting anything too damning, but Levi caught it too. He was dense, not an idiot. “No, you don’t have to tell me. I mean, there’s a lot of other reasons you might not ask for help, too. Maybe you don’t want to feel weak, or admit that you need help from other people. Or maybe it’s because it’s hard to ask someone for something, when you’re already annoying them just by being around them. Or… that last one is probably just me.”

“You’re not annoy--”

“It’s not about that!” Levi cut you off, determined to make his point. “The point is, you can’t do everything by yourself. Even Henry has the seven lords to help him. And Ruri-chan has her friends. In fact, her friends are what make her so--”

Levi took a deep breath, for once stopping his own tirade about anime. “Can you just… tell me why, at least?”

Song references aside, it wasn’t an easy question to answer, even if you wanted to. Levi didn’t often ask for this kind of thing though, which made it hard to turn him down. “It’s a lot of things, like you said. I just want to show that I can. Do things on my own, I mean.”

Levi frowned, unsure how to combat you. He already wasn’t exactly a pro on asking people for help, he holed up in his room too much for that. He had been, so far, basing it off the rare times he left his room. But now you were mentioning something that he could relate to on some level, except… “You… want to prove yourself?”

“I guess.” Not how you’d phrase it, necessarily, but not entirely inaccurate. Or really, it was oversimplifying the issue by a long shot, but it was better to give Levi half credit rather than no credit. His self esteem could certainly use it.

“But why!? You’re-- you’re so cool! You made a pact with every demon in the House of Lamentation! You could make a pact with Diavolo if you tried! You taught Satan to control his anger, you got Asmo to care about someone other than himself, you stood up to Lucifer when he was going to kill Beel and Luke-- and you, too!--, you got Belphie to get along with everyone again, you even died and--” It could’ve been that he realized what he was saying, or it could’ve been that he saw your face when he brought it up; either way, Levi clamped his mouth shut mid-sentence.

“I-I mean, not everyone gets to respawn.” He mumbled, hoping a video game reference would make it less awkward again. After a moment of silence, he reiterated his original point. “You don’t need to prove yourself. You already have.”

It was heartwarming, hearing Levi sing your praises as he did. But that wasn’t exactly a quick fix for the fact that asking for help meant admitting you were bad at something. Or even just admitting to needing help at all. Lucifer said he had to teach you some pride, well here was a lesson you could skip. This one you knew well: don’t want to swallow your pride and ask for help? Easy, just don’t ever ask!

Levi seemed antsy to fill the silence, but managed to hit the nail on the head when he spoke again. “I know how it feels, when you see someone that’s better than you at something. It’s frustrating. And painful. Especially if you’re supposed to be the best, and then someone else knows more than you do, about a book series that they just read for the first time, and then spoil stuff about the one that hasn’t even been released yet, even though you’re the number one TSL fan and they shouldn’t even have that informa--”

“That was one time!” You protested. Levi let out a puff of air that was somewhere in between a scoff and a snort, but he didn’t seem to be legitimately angry. Then again, leave it to Levi to hold a grudge from the early days of the exchange program.

“Sometimes though, you can use that jealousy. Being jealous of someone can drive you to get better at things, or to learn from them. Or just ask them for help, if you have to. I’m never gonna work out like Beel, so if I need help lifting something I’ll just ask him for help doing it.” He deliberately didn’t mention his past experiences in asking for Beel’s help in getting fit, hoping you didn’t know about the devilgram posts Asmo made about it. You did, but decided to let it go. After a moment of consideration, he added, “I usually have to pay him with food, though.

“We may not always get along, but at least my brothers and I know how to depend on each other. Lucifer may act-- well, be annoyed a lot, but there’s a reason everyone goes to him for help. He helps the people he cares about… even if it comes with a lecture. Everyone knows to go to Satan if they need information, or help studying. Asmo’s so good with fashion that he works with Majolish, and still--” Levi’s chest puffed out a bit as he spoke-- “he comes to me for help in design too, since he knows I’m the best at cosplays.”

“That almost sounded like you were complimenting yourself.” Levi deflated a bit at your teasing tone, both embarrassed and a bit self-conscious. You felt some guilt about the latter, but none from the former. Not when his embarrassment meant his face scrunched up like that, and he floundered to go back on his own claims.

“W-Well, I didn’t mean-- of course I’m good at otaku stuff! A normie wouldn’t understand!” He floundered, clearly at a loss for what to say if he was falling back on calling you a normie. That was pretty much his version of sticking his tongue out when he lost.

“It’s hard to imagine Mammon ever gets asked for help.” You offered, trying to get him back on track. ...and maybe continue to push his buttons just a tad.

“That idiot--” Levi took a deep breath, gritting his teeth as he sought a way to talk about Mammon without including some form of insult, “He gets into trouble all the time, obviously. He’s a moron because of the kind of trouble he gets into, not because he asks for help. At least he knows to come to us for help when he needs it.”

At that, Levi gave you a pointed look. Well, consider that the last time you ever try to help him get back on track.

“Mc, none of us will think less of you. People usually consider it an ego-boost if someone comes to them for help. Especially if it’s y--” Levi fumbled, quick to brush past his near-slip. “If anything, we want to help. If you asked for help with your work and school and things, you’d have more time to yourself; for watching anime and playing games.”

Levi tried to make it sound like he was being benevolent, but the implied ‘with me’ was hard to miss.

“So, you could try asking for help some more, to lighten your load. If you want. It would make me-- um, make u-us feel better, too.” He seemed content in ending it there, and made an effort to end any potential continuation of the topic. Flipping on a dime, Levi was quick to talk over any potential response. “Th-That’s all, anyways! Uh, we can just-- go back to, you know. Playing devilcart, or um, we can watch some anime, or--”

“Thank you, Levi.” You had to put a hand on his arm to make him listen, the simple action instantly sending the touch-starved demon into fight-or-flight mode. “I’ll try.”

He swallowed back his nerves and nodded, surprised he had managed to make it through that whole talk. You were too, really, as soon as you realized that this was supposed to be his intervention for you.

As much as you might loathe to admit it, his talk made sense. Or at least it had some aspects of truth to it, and perhaps you felt marginally better about asking the bros for help. Levi made it very clear how he felt about wanting to help you, the least you could do was see if the others felt the same. And hey, maybe he had a point about people wanting you to ask them for help in general, too. Who would’ve guessed it, but so far these demons seemed to know a thing or two about sinning.

---

“Is something the matter, my Lord?”

“It’s been awfully quiet the past few days. I wonder what those brothers are up to?” Boredom generally caused Diavolo’s mind to wander to the Devildom’s most notorious troublemakers, but this week especially. His fellow members of the student council had been quieter than normal, without even a yelling match in days; much less something exciting enough to warrant Diavolo’s attention. Thus leaving the prince here, sighing as he pondered their goings on.

Barbatos poured Diavolo’s tea with a knowing smile. “They have been quite busy this week.”

“Oh?”

“It seems they’re corrupting Mc.” Barbatos spoke as if it were a common occurrence.

Diavolo chuckled. “Should we be worried?”

“Quite the opposite. They’re working together to get Mc to take better care of themself.”

“Is that so?” Lethargy had caused Diavolo to ignore his tea at first, but the new information made him forget about it altogether. Diavolo sat up straighter, excitement tugging his mouth into a smile. “Perhaps I’ll bring tomorrow’s meeting to Lucifer, and pay the house of lamentation a visit.”

“Of course, my Lord.”

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