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#his comment with the context of what he’s said before just comes across as extremely ableist and uncaring
alesbianperson · 7 months
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bully!ellie williams x fem!reader
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summary: Ever since that project that you both worked on, shes been unreasonably mean to you and you have no idea why.
warnings: mean ellie (not really extreme tho); implied football player!ellie; some swear words
authors note: this is my first attempt to write in like 2 years and just half proofread and english isn't my first language (cliché, i know), so i apologise for any context or grammar mistakes
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You loved going to school. You were nice to everyone, and everyone liked you. Even the mean teachers. However, there was one person who could not stand you, and you didn't even know the reason. She was just being unreasonably mean to you since that one project.
4 years earlier
Your biology teacher just announced a partner project at which your classmates already began searching for their preferred partners. You turned to your best friend who just gave you a thumbs up, but before you could stand up and walk over to her, the teacher suddenly said: "Before you all get too exited, I already assigned the partners."
An annoyed sigh left your lips as you sat back down, already expecting the worst. Your teacher began to read the partners aloud while you sat with your fingers crossed, hoping you'd get assigned with your best friend.
Which did not happen. When only a few of your classmates were left, he finally said your name. "You will work with Ellie Williams." You sighed in relief. From what you've heard, she was pretty okay. Smart, too. So working with her wouldn't be a catastrophe. As the teacher began listing the topics that were available, you turned around to face Ellie, who was already looking at you. You flashed a smile at her, which she returned.
Within the next few days, you both mostly met up in the library to work. It was funny to work with her, plus the topic was really easy. You wouldn't really talk about anything other than the project, but Ellie somehow  always found a way to make some jokes referring to her interests and you couldn't help but laugh at every single one of them.
You both were finished very quickly and got an a for that project. Working with her was pretty fun, too. At least you thought that.
Ever since then, she began commenting on everything you did. When you'd ask something in class and the teacher answered, she'd chuckle and say something like "obviously." When you both crossed paths in the hallway, she'd make sure to talk about you to her friends and let you hear it. When you'd be studying in the library with your headphones on, she'd come up to you, lift them up on one ear, and let them snap back on before simply leaving again, or closing your books and mess up your notes.
All that with no explanation. And it drove you completely insane.
Present day
"Williams! Keep up!" The coach yelled across the field. You stood right beside him, holding the second football they needed for training earlier. Your brother had said this was a great 'side job' idea, but until now, it was kinda boring and exhausting to follow the coaches' unnecessary tasks. Plus, Ellie was in the team, and you couldn't ignore the feeling that she'd say something to embarres you any moment.
"So," the coach turned to you, "practise is almost over, bring the stuff back into the storage room." You mentally rolled your eyes at his tone and the missing please, but quickly picked up everything and walked to the storage rooms. Without really motivation, you began to sort the things into the right drawers or shelves. Suddenly you heard footsteps, which came from outside. Probably the footballers, you thought, since the locker rooms were right beside this room, shifting your attention back to the agility ladders until you heard a familiar voice.
"Why's she suddenly here too? Shes making me lose my fucking mind." Ellie. You didn't have the nerve hearing her talk shit about you again, so you made your way to the door, but the next thing that was said made you freeze. "Then go talk to her. Tell her how you feel. It can't get any worse than this." That was Jesse's voice. You knew him from one of your classes and as one of Ellies best friends. He sometimes apologised for Ellies behaviour when he was with her. "I can't. What if she's grossed out? She'll never even look in my direction again." You were confused. All these comments because Ellie was scared that you didnt like her? Your thoughts were interrupted by Jesse. "But getting her attention through bullying is better?" A short silence. "At least she looks at me. She notices me. Every time I walk into a room she's in, her attention is on me. You don't understand. I need it." More silence.
You needed a second to process what you just heard, and you still couldn't really believe it. Ellie Williams, the one girl you were one hundred percent sure hated every bit of you, suddenly liked you.
"Yeah, whatever." You heard Jesse say before you heard him walk off. After waiting a few seconds, you tried to move as quiet as possible because you weren't sure if Ellie was still standing outside the door. But before you could make that sure, you bumped into the shelf behind you, which caused a loud sound. "Is there anyone?" You heard Ellie ask and froze. fuck, you thought, looking for another door you could exit through.
The door suddenly opened, and you were met with the green eyes of Ellie. As she realised it was you, she went pale. "You.. heard all that?"
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For the anon worried about Travis, and any others who maybe have seen a few remarks floating around and aren't sure what to think:
The 'breeder' comment is a very good example of why seeking out context is important before getting upset about things you come across online. It's actually part of a very cute exchange with his family, where he and his brother were trying to make their mom pick her favorite on the podcate. Jason got their mom to name him (Jason) as the One She Would Save because he has kids, and Travis was joking that he needs to find a woman to give him kids so his mom will pick/love him. If you want to see the full thing for yourself rather than just take my interpretation of it (maybe you'll see the full context and still find my glasses far too rose-colored, as is your right), it's the New Heights episode from the week before the Super Bowl featuring Donna and Ed Kelce.
Despite how the fandom generally have been acting, Travis is in fact a human person with faults and a past and opinions we might not agree with, not a Perfect Unicorn Man ripped straight from a romance novel. We can't expect perfection from him, or anyone, nor should we. He will probably say or do other things in his life that some people won't love. This does not make him a bad person, or Taylor a bad person for dating him. It just means people are people, and people are messy and fallible and interesting and changeable and challenging. (If I may throw it back to one of my favorite things Sarah has said this year: "Support women's wrongs!" Same energy, even if the exact situation doesn't quite match)
If we want to find something to be upset about, we can go searching and find it for absolutely anyone, Taylor included. But on the aggregate, Travis seems to be a really really great guy. He's extremely hard-working, charitable, personable. He seems to make Taylor very happy, and to respect the hell out of her. I think we've found a winner here. Let's take the win.
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I don’t remember the context of the sex before the fourth date comment, but I do want to say that with the breeder comment, it’s very clear in context that that’s not how Travis feels about women— he’s more making fun about how that’s the only reason his mom wants him to find a partner, so he can breed and give her grandchildren. He goes on to talk about how while he does want to settle down and have children some day, what he really craves is a genuine connection with someone. Prior to Taylor coming into the picture it was kind of a recurring theme on the podcast that Travis was lonely and really seeking out love, so the whole conversation fit into that. It’s totally reasonable if you don’t like that language at all and don’t want to engage with someone who said it even as a joke, but I think the reports of “he called all women breeders!” aren’t really accurate— at the very least that interpretation is missing a lot of nuance and context to make it sound as bad as possible when if you listen to the podcast it’s really clear that’s not what he was saying at all
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Cheers to the TSSers putting in the thought and the energy and the care on the topic that I just simply cannot. It is appreciated and so kind.
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sapphyreopal5 · 17 days
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I think would be a great idea for you to make a video talking about Gen and Danneel doing black magic. I think people would be interested in your conversation with the psychic guy by your guys messaging each other. After I did read of screenshots from your last post. I am hooked and hungry for want know more information about it, plus I want your opinion about Gen too.
By the way, did the psychic guy message you again? Because I am dying to know what he said more about Danneel and Jensen.
Hello Anon, thank you for the ask. So he and I have been talking some. Some of the same stuff has been said by him multiple but also by me in different words in multiple posts. For a point of reference, this is the first of these screenshots I posted regarding Danneel and Gen's black magic. I have a few more messages I will share below as well. He and I did talk about Hilarie Burton. I know quite a few anti Danneel folks here don't like Hilarie as well, some have said she comes across as fake and such. Interesting fact about Hilarie, she is actually not an incarnated demon like Danneel is but is instead an incarnated dark Faye. Hmmm, does Danneel in fact have a brunette lover or did she just hang out with a brunette? Some people might think she is in fact talking about Steve, which a lot of fellow anti Danneel bloggers here would know about ha ha. The psychic guy did tell a little more about Danneel's said illnesses and a couple more things.
I just might make a video Anon if there's enough demand for it since it takes time to do research, put together screenshots like this, make the video, edit as needed, etc.
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As for my opinion on Gen, now that is something I didn't really elaborate on but it can be implied by more recent posts of mine, I don't exactly hold her on a pedestal. Before I elaborate on my opinions of Gen, I wanted to take a chance to address something I recently saw. Namely, a post someone sent me where it seems an Anon was talking about my Hooters post and where the answer talked about how normal that is going to places like that and how this is crucifying him or perhaps holding him to impossible standards. Now come on, I am no Jared hater and in fact overall like him a lot. No one escapes my observations for better or for worse, Jared and Gen included. I do however just about always defend my friends and family, even if I end up telling them they are wrong in private. I never embarrass my friends or family on purpose and wouldn't do this my partner if I had one unlike Gen ha ha.
Because of the fact I am a personality theories nerd, if anyone is familiar with the MBTI I'm big time ENTP. Of course, labels don't describe everything and we are more than just certain things but I am mentioning this because I question EVERYTHING and EVERYONE, it's what I do. Some people just need to get over this.... anyways onto the real topic, just wanted to share that fun fact about myself and a tidbit of my general personality with you all.
I decided to take this opportunity to share screenshots from a Reddit thread on others' opinions on men who frequently go to places like Hooters, Tilted Kilt, Coyote Ugly, and then the other ones mentioned in the screenshots below. I will say especially this comment in my opinion, 'cause it is extremely relevant for why I question this whole Hooters frequenting of Jared's in my book (and notably without Gen being there for the more recent times in recent years): "Depends on context. Once in a while for a birthday party or guy’s night is fine. Routinely/regularly on his own? That’s weird." I like people getting multiple perspectives thrown into one, 'cause I can. That's just how I roll, kids! But hey, if you want to see some other sites that talk about this, you can also check out this Quora question, this Askmen thread (where of course a lot of the guys who answered said it's merely a woman being insecure), another Reddit thread where her husband keeps lying about going to places like this, this girlsaskguys thread, you guys get the idea at this point, don't cha?!
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And I am pretty sure this is exactly what all these "crazy, insecure women" are thinking these Hooters waitresses and such are thinking, summarized in a catchy song "Don't Cha" by the Pussycat Dolls. 🎶I'd probably be just as crazy about you if you were my own man🎶
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Nah but man for real, I found it funny how the same day Coyote Ugly photos came out, Gen's hair stylist or something posted this. Was this to validate herself or just her position in her cushy lifestyle. Oops, I meant as Jared's loving wife and mother of 3 children... or did I? Here I answered someone earlier today about Jared going from wanting to retire to being a producer and then ended up being both the lead character and the Executive Producer on his Show "Walker". I provided plenty of direct quotes to show what is being officially said about why he changed his mind on staying in acting. Note that I said officially there being the keyword in the last sentence. My real opinion? I think that Jared started to realize that because he spent so much time away from home that he in a way feels like an outsider, an issue that might've been exasperated by the COVID lockdowns. I can't for the life of me find where that interview was originally from, so if someone wants to chime in I'll gladly give credit :D
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Now I'm going to bring up a couple of quotes directly from this video that was from their Walker Interview on "The Talk" from April 2021 after the midseason finale of Walker. Again coming straight out of Jared and Gen's mouths.
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9:48 What has it been like to to get to work together and live together again? Jared: "Uhh it's been pretty magical I think I think I'll kind of echo something that Gen said earlier which is it's really nice you know. I think as it happens often times mothers will umm put their passions and their talents aside uh when having kids. And annoying so below, 10:12 Um more often than not it's because the fathers are useless. I know I can say that as far as I go, and so she kind of stepped aside from acting for about nine years to make sure that our kids didn't perish so thank god but now seeing her work again in her elements. You know she had gone to school and acted she had her own TV show and then we had met on the TV, she had done movies and this and that and so to be able to show her off you know during COVID times. Con't. 10:55 During COVID times my kids can't come to set because we're all tested regularly. You have to be part of a certain uh grouping tha tyou can only talk with people that you work with, we're all wearing masks and we're all distancesd and so I can't bring friends or family or my kids to set but I can have my wife there because she's on show as well. 11:03 to 11:12: It's date day. So there have been I'll admit there have been a few times where we've been on set and it'll be like 5pm and we're both wrapped. We're like well if we wait a couple hours then the kids will be asleep by the time we get home. Gen starts laughing and says (I think) don't admit that. 11:16 to 11:26: They won't see it, they won't know until a couple more years. (Gen briefly says "catch dinner") Yeah we're gonna be like pretending, let's pretend we're still filming. Uh, let's tell the babysitter we're still filming and let's go get some sushi or something" 11:36 onward And of course, Gen takes a moment to talk about her pet project TOWWN here. Is this about the show Walker or is this about the Jared and Gen show?
Well Jared she certainly made her stance clear in this interview with Dave Hollis (partial transcript included in my post here) how she really felt about you coming home to live with her. Just saying...
"This is the first time I lived with my husband. I know that sounds really crazy but my husband had been filming a TV show for 15 years in Vancouver so when all of this started you know he came down here. He had 2 episodes left and then that was the completion of the series. Personally, it meant that I had to live with him and deal with coparenting which was really stressful like the thought of it. And to make that work, and it was crazy because we were always in this tight bubble with just us and our kids and it really was simplifying. It was you know like the layers are gone. The interference is gone, drama is kinda out the window in a way, and we got to really simplify basic needs. It's so weird how much unlayering we had to do and that's what I'm finding through all of this is a lot of unlayering to get to the core". "I was just talking to someone about this that my favorite relationship with him is a work relationship. Sometimes it's hard to be married to him because he's like, Jared is so interesting because he's so analytical. I mean my husband, I'm going to toot his horn because he's literally one of the smartest human beings I've ever met in my life and it's annoying because he will correct you on words you think he didn't even know. I have a book of SAT words just because I'm like I am going to get him. And so I'll just casually talk about something and use a crazy word in a sentence and he'll be like well you pronounced it incorrectly. It's so frustrating. Also in our marriage he's very giving and emotional and supportive. He's supportive in everything that I've done and I feel really lucky and grateful. I think even more so when it comes to work he is your biggest cheerleader and it's going to be a lot of time together. But funny enough, I think we'll be better at work than sometimes we are at home. Because I'm like, this is how the kids are, this is how I like them, this is the order that I like things in. And it's hard for me to let go I think, at home. but at work, it's just a really nice exchange and I feel really lucky, and he'll sit there too. If he's not working, he'll take it, pull up a chair and talk on the phone and watch at me and I can hear him bragging about me and whether he's doing it for my benefit I don't know but it makes me feel good and I feel really lucky that he does stuff like that."
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Cute how they bring the kids to the set of Walker at times like they did in the promos last week, ain't it? However, being the questioner I am I wondered after a friend brought up a great point: "why didn't she and Jared celebrate watching the Total Solar Eclipse together on April 8, 2024, which was yesterday?" Not like COVID is preventing Gen from bringing the kids on the set CLEARLY. AND why was she NOT taking this amazing chance to advertise the cool Walker Eclipse glasses (therefore advertising HER and HER HUSBAND'S show) but instead chose to advertise yet another company in her IG story? Another affiliate partnership that's probably gonna rake in less dollars than you know, her husband's show (I meant the "family project")? Dunno you all decide...
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I mean also funny how in the post below she was seen wearing one of these "less cool" types of Eclipse glasses during the 2017 Solar eclipse, which I'm saying 'cause they're not as snazzy or sunglasses like. So, not buying the whole "it's because it's more fashionable" type of logic or "she can do whatever she wants". Sure she can but she's in the public eye so her actions and such are free game to criticism. Bite me!
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Point is, Gen is just a walking advertisement. She is fake, she's clearly all about her cushy lifestyle she didn't truly earn (looking at you, black magic!), and frankly I'm pleased that she's got a long ass sentence in "hell" ahead of her (which is funnily enough way longer than Danneel's actually). Also, is it just me or is there something weird about this page excerpt she selected from the book and then comparing it to the attire she chose for the Mom2Summit event this weekend in Nashville, TN? As if the following book excerpt isn't somehow telling about how she REALLY feels without actually saying how she feels...
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Notice the color of her pants in that post Charlie made has her in turquoise pants. And then go read the above. It starts with: "When we're married, I want us to work together. We'll be a team, and I won't leave you out of matters the way my dad did my mom. She wishes Harv hadn't told her all of this. If he was only using her to prop up his family name, it would be easier to leave him. But he wants a true partnership, one where he would welcome her opinions and thoughts." Another part says towards the end of the page "She pictures Ko Lipe from her poster, the inviting turquoise waves. Her dress flutters around her legs as she heaves one leg over the railing, then the other. On her tiptoes, she surveys the water below her. It's no Thai island but it'll do. She jumps." Also note where she underlined: "Too many expectations. Too many people in her ear saying they're not asking for too much. She gives and gives but still it's not enough."
Not sure how much she's giving here because she's been handed everything on a silver platter and fed by a silver spoon her entire life but what do I know? Turns out she even walked away during this summit towards the end to "take a phone call". From who, your husband who once said was ignoring you in a video and said "come on pick up" in? Feeling a bit petty right now XD
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My bottomline view of Gen is, she tries to portray herself as this homestead type of crunchy Earth hippy mom but then when you look at her closely enough she is a much bigger liar than Danneel is and is much more fake. She is not this great, super supportive wife that Jared for some dumb ass reason keeps trying to make her out to be. For example, I find it funny how just last week she was all about promoting Walker, even including filming Jared with Odette and Shep. Cute right? Until I realized that they didn't even share the moment of the Total Eclipse yesterday, let alone Gen advertised yet another affiliate product instead of her own husband's show. I honestly don't believe the whole oh we can't bring the kids on set rule during COVID. If y'all are the bosses (oh sorry, there's really only 1 and that's Jared NOT Gen) you can make exceptions. What is the CDC gonna do, arrest you for bringing your kids to work? They could've made them stay stuck to their iPads or something, not that hard to social distance unless they're unruly. But then again being the wittle rebel I can be at times, I just think outside the box a lot. Heck, I brought my kid to work with me to my job during COVID and when he did them online schooling sessions and all that on iPad, ain't it so nice being able to work for family? ♥
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empress-of-snark · 11 months
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Hey I love your fic!! I know you were thinking about including TOW the Flashback where everyone almost hooks up with someone else; if you are writing that (and don’t mind spoiling) who do you think would try to hook up? It was easy in Friends because there were 3 straight men & 3 straight women, I’m curious how would it work with Robin and Eddie in the mix.
(Ignore me this is just me brainstorming) I can def see Steve and Nancy perfectly matching the Joey and Monica story bc that just really feels like a Steve move, but idk abt the rest of them. I guess if you avoid Eddie/Chrissy it would either be Chrissy/Jonathan & Eddie/Robin or Chrissy/Robin & Jonathan/Eddie. I feel like either Eddie/Robin or Chrissy/Robin could go with the Rachel/Chandler story. I could see Robin trying to make a move on Chrissy (maybe she overhears her talking to her friends about how she regrets not experimenting in college at all bc she kinda went straight from Patrick to Jason) and I could also see Eddie trying with Robin before he knows she’s gay. I could maybe see Jonathan/Chrissy having a moment similar to Ross/Phoebe one, like maybe back in college they bumped into each other while Chrissy was upset about Patrick and Jonathan was upset about Nancy and something almost happened. I agree w you abt Jonathan/Eddie having potential: maybe when they first met Eddie thought Jon liking Bowie was a signal that’s he’s gay/bi. Or I could see a younger Jonathan potentially being interested in experimenting w Eddie when they’re high esp if he’s sad abt Nancy. Anyway this is just me rambling, I’m sure whatever you write will be amazing and be the most true to the characters. Have a great day!!
Thank you so much!!
I actually have SO MANY thoughts about the potential of this episode—you’re so right that Robin’s sexuality definitely throws a wrench into the plans (I say with love). It’s what’s kept me from being able to come up with a concrete outline.
That being said…
Totally agree that Steve/Nancy is a given (although I’ve talked plenty about the potential of Eddie/Nancy). They already have a romantic history in canon, so it makes sense. I can definitely see them having a brief infatuation when Steve first moves across the hall before realizing very quickly that they don’t make sense together.
(For context, I don’t completely hate Stancy, but I don’t like the idea of them being endgame. He wants a big family and she doesn’t—neither of them should have to compromise on that)
I absolutely adore the idea of Jonathan and Chrissy maybe finding comfort in each other when dealing with their respective romance woes. I have a soft spot for them—I think they’d actually make a really cute couple, being so similar. Chrissy kind of needs someone to look after her and Jonathan’s very good at looking after people (it’s rotten work/not to me, not if it’s you vibes honestly)
The comedic potential of Eddie hitting on Robin or Jonathan before finding out they’re not interested… amazing 😂
However, I am also into the idea of both Jonathan and Chrissy experimenting with their sexuality a bit. I can just picture Robin overhearing Chrissy’s comment and immediately tripping over herself like “hi yes, I’m Robin, I’m very gay and I’m more than happy to volunteer my services”
I also had an idea that Robin might be feeling low after getting rejected by a straight girl and thinking hell, maybe she should give men a try, after all. But after one extremely awkward, stiff kiss with Steve (think Chandler and Phoebe in ‘the one where everyone finds out’) she’s like “nope, still gay”
Ugh, there’s so many good possibilities! I wish I could write them all!
Thank you so much for the ask! Hope you have a lovely day as well!
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nope-body · 3 years
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#thinking about a comment my dad made a bit ago#that my accommodation for extended time is unusual for someone like me because it’s usually for people who have an intellectual disability#and it just. makes me so upset? and frustrated and just. sad.#upset because he doesn’t know what he’s talking about and is just assuming that he’s right (like always when it comes to my mental health)#he had no reason to say that!#that comment compounded with other comments he’s made about me relying on accommodations too much#and how I should be trying to overcome my challenges instead of just getting an accommodation#stuff like that#his comment with the context of what he’s said before just comes across as extremely ableist and uncaring#and I’m frustrated because I know exactly why he said it! because it’s what my counselors are saying to justify not wanting to give me the#accommodations I’m asking for#they’re using the excuse of ‘I’m too smart for accommodations’ essentially#and it’s frustrating because at the very least my *counselor* should be on my side because she’s my counselor! her job is to support me!#but instead I’m put in this box of ‘too smart to need help’ by the people who’s job it is to help me#and guess what! just because I’m smart does not erase my need for help!#just because my brain can work overtime to compensate for all the problems I have and still be able to do advanced work#*doesn’t mean that my brain isn’t doing more work than a neurotypical person’s and needs support so that it doesn’t have to*#and all their comments just reflect a basic misunderstanding of what ADHD even *is*#my parents and my counselor and the school psychiatrist- none of them understand that ADHD is a way of functioning and thinking#and that it goes down to the biological structure of the brain. that it is inherently different than a neurotypical brain and that#is not changeable#but they don’t get it! they think about it like anxiety or depression. where you can change your thought patterns and break out of it#that’s not how adhd works!!#and I’m sad because it’s the same problem with my parents again and again.#they’re demonstrating that they don’t care enough about me to learn about adhd#something that has been a problem with them ever since I was diagnosed#they just. don’t learn. they don’t educate themselves#and I want my parents to care about me! but they’re showing that they don’t. not really.#because they won’t even learn about a mental disorder that both their kids have. one that impacts them daily and will continue to for#the rest of our lives
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neutinya · 3 years
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Some relationships are you, a human, with a human partner, and other are you, a human, and your 240cm tall monster bf, but that's okay - !! I included their backstory as well as the setting up of the general context for this AU below the cut so if you’re interested,,, do consider reading it fhdjdj;;; I'm really happy with how this turned out and it's super fun to draw monster tooru and his 4 arms lmao I'm super excited for this AU;;; I really wanna draw more of it dndjjxjd
Iwa is monster-hunter royal blood. However he doesn't want to be heir to the monster hunter shit so he decided to run away the day before his coronation??
As a kid he would play with all the monster animals near the forest which is where he met his lizard familiar and llama ceb. The day he runs away he brings them with him??
The moment he ran away from his kingdom and title as prince he was immediately hunted down by hunters sent by his own family for dishonouring them the Iwaizumi name. Like he's straight up wanted??? ahhh
Somewhere along the way he meets Tooru and they probably wouldn't get along at the start
?? Like they meet at some weird beer house?? And Iwa obviously sticks out because he's human and humans aren't exactly super welcomed because of the history between monsters and humans. Iwa being oblivious to the monster world obviously doesn't realise why this four armed dude won't stop pestering him in spite of his attempts to keep a low profile.
Tooru had approached him because he was sure if he didn't step in, Iwa would have been killed
Iwa was initially extremely resistant to Tooru's "advances" until Tooru whispers into Iwa's ear that "I don't know if you realised but almost every monster in this beer house is staring at you with the intent to kill, so unless you want to leave this place alive, play along and let me get you out of here"
And Iwa just looks around the room and he realises that Tooru was right so he plays along and they try to leave but one of the monsters in the beer house walks up to them and asks Tooru to back off so they could kill Iwa, and Tooru is just like "no can do, he's a friend of mine" and the dude is just like "move." But Tooru is adamant much to the annoyance of the other. A fight kinda breaks out, but much to Iwa's surprise, Tooru managed to take all of them down with ease
As they go aside, Iwa just asks Tooru why doesn't he want to kill him like the rest of the monsters and Tooru is just 🤷🤷🤷🤷🤷 Iwa apologises for causing such a big commotion and getting Tooru involved unnecessarily. Tooru says it's not a problem and Iwa not really having that much money on him, asks if he could return him in some other way? He offers a family heirloom at first but Tooru is just like "Not interested, although how about you let me tag along wherever you're headed?"
Iwa’s response is just "???" Tooru says "look, you aren't getting anywhere in these parts as a human, if I tag along, you won't have to worry too much about being killed and you returned the favour, it's a win win."
So that's how they kinda go off on their journey!!! Iwa actually learns a lot about monsters from Tooru who seemed much more knowledgeable than he looked (no offense to Tooru but that was Hajime’s genuine first impression) There were so many different types of monsters and Iwa was just?? So amazed and almost excited that there were so many things for him to learn and explore??
Like okay they had a bad first impression but he was kinda starting to like Tooru as a companion, listening to way Tooru told all those stories offered him a comfort that he never had back at home
Tooru did most of the talking honestly but Iwa was always intently listening and Tooru could tell he was intrigued and super attentive so he didn’t mind
He did ask Iwa about why he was wandering around in the first place and why the hell was he just traversing across the land with no plan or knowledge of the terrain. Iwa tells Tooru he ran away from his family but neglected to tell Tooru he was of royal monsterhunter blood. Iwa fires back the same question and Tooru responds saying “I get bored of spending all my time in the same old place every day.” neglecting to tell Iwa the fact that he too was of royal blood, the king to one of the many monster kingdoms. (Actually one of the most feared in fact??)
I was thinking the four armed form isn't his real monster form but a less scary version, he's actually a huge fearsome beast but he would walk around in this form to blend with the common folk. This also explains why people don’t recognize him, because if they really knew who he was, they’d be terrified of him.
Tooru is extremely flirty and generally enjoys teasing Hajime. Iwa's lizard does not like Tooru at all. It would be sitting on Iwa's shoulder, breathing small fireballs at Tooru whenever the brunette got too close- For example, when Tooru tries to wrap an arm around Iwa's shoulder or waist, Haji’s lizard would get extremely angry and began attacking him. Tooru is super upset about this tiny little creature preventing him from getting close to his new human companion, but nevertheless, he learns to pick moments where the lizard is asleep to try and engage with Haji
Sidenote, Iwa is a really fucking good archer and good at knives. He may not have had the heart to be a monster hunter, but he definitely had the physical skills to be one if he desired.
Of course there’s a bunch of shenanigans, but honestly speaking there’s also a good amount of sexual tension?? They have a lot of moments where they kinda save each other, whether it be having run ins with unfriendly monsters or humans, to navigating dangerous terrain and making hard decisions;;
They grow to be rather close friends I would dare say;; In fact, for the most part, Tooru would be Iwa's first genuine friend :(( Iwa was never given the luxury of having friends growing up. He spent most of his time training to be a monster hunter or learning about them, which is why he grew super attached to Tooru platonically at first
Once they have a pretty mean run in where Tooru ends up seriously hurt;; Iwa was so scared that he would lose Tooru at that moment;; Tooru fake dies to kinda tease Iwa but he didn't expect Iwa to cry, so as Iwa is there like "don't die on me you idiot-" Tooru "comes back to life" and is all like "awww is Iwa-chan crying because of me?" And Iwa, embarrassed, just punches him in the chest and wipes away his tears like "shut the fuck up asshole"
Tooru is just like "ow- I may not be dead but I'm still kinda hurt you know?" And Iwa feels bad so he just tries to play it off like "that's what you deserve dumbass" before treating Tooru's wounds. They end up spending the night at this cave near a lake where they decided to stay for a few days since Tooru was pretty beat up and the weather was pretty bad
Haji pretty much nursed Tooru back to health, finding berries, herbs and all that during the day in order to make medicine and food
I think at one point Tooru comments "You're really good at this kinda thing huh?" And Iwa is just confused like "good at what?" And Tooru elaborates "taking care of people. Not everyone can make medicine like you do you know?" And Iwa just says it was nothing and he learned most of it from reading when he was a kid
Also like I said the weather was pretty bad so imagine Iwa curling up next to his llama and lizard for warmth. Tooru finds it so fucking adorable??? Clearly the two of them loved Iwa and vice versa, but he couldn't help but feel a little jealous at the sight uxjxhdh
So like one night he just casually says "you guys sure look warm over there" and Iwa just looks at him like 😐
"I gave you my cape you know" and Tooru just "Monsters can't regulate heat like humans do, at least not my species" That was a lie but Iwa didn't know that, so he kinda just looks at Tooru funny before scooting over to Tooru and lying down next to him. His llama and lizard follow, and scoot on Tooru's other side so Tooru is kinda sandwiched in between Haji and the pets. Iwa just mumbles a quiet "now go to sleep dumbass" and Tooru just smiles like a fucking idiot
Iwa quickly dozes off but Tooru not so much, when he was sure Iwa was asleep he gently drapes the cape over Iwa instead before going to bed himself
The next day Iwa is the first to wake up and much to his fucking surprise, he was pretty much incapable of moving because Tooru had somehow wound up hugging him with two of his arms. He was so embarrassed he thought he could die so he could only stay there and not do anything. After while he realises that staying like that could only mean more mental suffering so he slowly tries inching away from Tooru to which he eventually succeeds
He does his morning routine which was to look for berries and herbs because Tooru needed quite a bit of medicine. Tooru was definitely close to being back to his healthy normal self but he still needed to make sure that everything was in check
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little riddle
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pairing: spencer reid x fem!reader warnings: gossip / rumours, talk of tattoos, a lil mutual pining, mainly fluff word count: 1.9k summary: crude workplace gossip brings you and spencer even closer. 
a/n: this is a follow up to little mystery. you don’t necessarily need to read the first part, but it will give you some context/background if you do.
-
News of the friendly little tattoo bet spread through the office like wildfire. And the news of who won was like adding gasoline to the heavily burning flame considering the risqué nature of your secret ink.
The thing about rumours is they don’t always start out that way.
Half the time it is simply an overheard conversation between friends, in this case also colleagues. The snippet is usually taken out of context. Passed from person to person to person until it spirals out of control and transforms into an unverified information statement. A believable one at that.
You were no stranger to workplace gossip, and truthfully it never bothered you. People will say what they want to say. Think what they want to think. It was a useless affair to try and stop them, or change their mind. Therefore, you never batted an eye.
Until now.
The current story going around didn't just involve you. It also focused on a certain young doctor who took things extremely literally, and often to heart.
Watching people walk through the bullpen whispering to one another, pointing fingers, and giggling. That sort of behaviour made you really angry. Primarily because you knew how to protect yourself and your feelings, but Spencer didn't quite grasp the concept of a rumour.
He currently sat slouching at his desk thinking he did something wrong.
With a soft sigh, you swiftly got to your feet and ambled towards him. Gently, you placed one hand on his shoulder causing him to glance up and meet your gaze. His lips pursed into an awkward half-smile.
“What do you say we get out of here? Maybe grab a quick bite to eat?” you suggested, raising a brow.
Spencer briefly glanced between the couple of agents currently looking at the two of you, whispering to one another. He nervously cleared his throat, and proceeded to slowly nod his head.
Once he stood up, you linked your arms together, unafraid of the judgemental stares.
Spencer on the other hand tensed under your touch, under your sudden closeness, under the lingering gaze of the gossiping agents. You noticed it instantly, and leaned in slightly so that your lips were at his ear.
“Don’t pay attention to them. They’re just jealous.” you whispered with a small smile.
The young doctor huffed quietly, clearly confused. “I don’t understand. Why would they be jealous?”
“Because you’ve seen what no other person in this sad joint has seen.” you teased, hoping it would lighten the mood just a little. It didn’t.
Spencer furrowed his brows together. “You mean the tattoo? If I knew it would cause this much drama I would have kept my mouth shut.”
“Don’t talk like that, doc. I’m glad you won the bet, I’m glad you got to see the tattoo, and I’m glad it’s you and me they’re talking about.” you reassured him as best you could, waiting for the elevator.
The metal machine appears momentarily and the two of you stepped inside. It was then you let go of his arm and leaned against the wall. Spencer slid his hands into the pockets of his pants, confusion still visible on his features.
“Why are you glad they're talking about us, Y/N?”
You shrugged. “Gotta make the best out of every situation, right? Plus, doc, I’m quite flattered they think I have a chance with someone like you.” you smiled, as his eyes widened.
Nervously, Spencer twitched his nose. “I-I... You-u think ehm, you think I’m out of your league?”
You nodded. “Of course! You’re incredibly smart, unknowingly funny, and not to mention really handsome. I’d be very lucky if you even considered being with someone like me.”
The young doctor wasn't entirely sure whether you meant what you said, or if perhaps you were just trying to cheer him up. Either way, it was the confidence boost he needed. His whole body instantly relaxed and his lips twirled upwards.
“I’d be the lucky one, Y/N.” he stated, a hint of hesitation in his voice.
Blood rushed to your face at the comment. You bit down on your bottom lip and simply stared at the man ahead, getting completely lost in his golden-eyes.
-
“Do I have something on my face?” you asked while bringing one hand up to your cheek, ready to wipe any crumbs away.
The young doctor quickly shook his head. “N-no... I-I ehm, I was just thinking.”
“About what?” you pried.
Spencer swallowed his breath. “Why don’t you want to know how I found out about your secret tattoo?” he asked in a low tone, and as soon as the question escaped his lips, he looked down at his empty plate, suddenly afraid of what your answer might be.
You observed him for a moment. The honest answer was you liked the mystery of not knowing. Spencer was always full of surprises, which is one of the many things you adored about him. To you, it didn’t matter how he found out.
The young doctor however, always liked to have all of the answers and you knew the topic would continue to bother him.
Dropping your fork, you placed your elbows on the edge of the table and rested your head in the palms of your hands. “Tell you what, doctor...” you began, grabbing his attention. He looked back up at you. “How about I guess how you knew? It’s only fair, don’t you think?”
The idea seemed to interest Spencer because his ears perked up and a timid smile circled his lips.
“But I’m gonna need some sort of clue because I am nowhere near as smart as you.” you added with a smirk, and he nodded.
The two of you sat in silence for a few minutes, just smiling at one another. An unfamiliar, yet unmistakably happy feeling settled in the pit of your stomach as his eyes searched yours with such amity you thought you would melt into your chair at any given second.
“So,” you cleared your throat, “What’s my clue?”
Spencer pursed his lips.
You could see the wheels turning, as he took his time to think of something that wouldn’t be too hard for you to guess. He would never underestimate your intelligence, and in all honesty Spencer had a feeling you probably already had the answer, you were just giving him the benefit of the doubt. Always putting him first. He couldn’t help but chew on the inside of his cheek, containing the goofy smile the thought brought.
“It is the beginning of eternity, the end of time and space, the beginning of the end and the end of every space. What is it?” Spencer asked, and you furrowed your brows.
“Are you seriously giving me a riddle right now?” you gawked, “That’s my clue?”
“You said not to make it easy on you,” he pointed out, and you were slightly taken aback by his sudden confidence. It was a good look on him, confidence. You took a mental note to point it out to him later.
“Touché.”
-
The riddle played on your mind the rest of the afternoon. You’d be lying if you said it didn’t interfere with your work just a little.
Leaning back in your chair, fiddling with the pen in your hand, you silently mouthed the words to yourself over and over again - trying to make sense of what the answer was.
The first to notice the contemplation spread across your features was Morgan. He approached your desk, propping himself against the item and crossing his arms. Your eyes snapped up and you immediately took note of the grin circling his lips.
“What’s on your mind, pretty lady?”
“A riddle.” you answered honestly.
Derek furrowed his brows. “A riddle?”
You nodded.
“Well, care to share? Maybe I can be of some assistance.” Morgan offered, leaning down towards you for a brief second.
“No,” you hummed, “I think I got this.”
Derek rolled his eyes, scoffing. “You and your secrets.”
The comment made you chuckle, but before you got to say anything back, Morgan continued, “I thought the mysteries ended when Elle left. The two of you always giggling and whispering to one another.”
Your eyes widened a little and you hopped on your feet. The action seemingly insignificant, but enough to alarm the man leaning against your desk.
“What?” he asked, “Did I say something wrong?”
You shook your head, a wide smile appearing on your face. “No. You said something exactly right.” And with that you were rushing out of the bullpen, in search for the young doctor.
You found him about five minutes later in the file room, too deep in thought to even hear you approach, so he just about jumped out of his skin when you walked up behind him and exclaimed: “The letter E!”
Spencer turned on his heel to face you. Palms of his hands instantly began to sweat when he registered how close you were standing to him.
“W-what?” he managed to breathe.
“It is the beginning of eternity, the end of time and space, the beginning of the end and the end of every space,” you repeated the riddle before adding, “The answer is the letter E and the E is for Elle! Elle told you, didn’t she?!”
Spencer gaped at you for a moment, taking note of the giddy look in your eyes and the proud smile. He then proceeded to inhale a whiff of your perfume which was now overpowering all of his senses.
“Spencer, did Elle tell you?” you enquired, poking his arm, and in turn dragging him back to earth.
The young doctor quickly nodded his head. “Y-yes. She did.”
“Why? I mean… How does that even come up in conversation?” you weren’t angry, no. As far as Spencer could tell you were just curious.
“Because, uhm... She said if I-I knew something... intimate... about you...” he paused and swallowed his breath, “... I would have an easier time asking you out.”
As soon as the confession escaped his lips, he inhaled a sharp breath and waited. Waited for you to tell him you don’t want to go out with him before apologising and walking out, leaving him all alone to wallow. But that never happened.
Instead, your hand was now grasping his, your thumb gently rubbing circles into his burning skin. Spencer’s knees buckled at your touch, and he hoped you didn’t see the slight shake.
“Why didn’t you? Ask me, I mean.” you wondered, breaking the silence.
“B-because I didn’t think you liked me like that.” Spencer replied, exhaling the breath he was holding.
You licked your lips and smiled at the brunette doctor. “Well, I think you should ask me now.”
“Uhm...” he swore if his heart was beating any faster it would explode, which was not entirely impossible, “Y/N, would you- do you want to go on a date with me sometime?”
Smiling at him, you leaned upwards and placed your lips to his cheek. You kissed it gently before once again meeting his gaze, “I would love to.”
-
masterlist
spencer reid taglist: @no-honey-no​, @calm-and-doctor​, @idroppedmygourd​​, @averyhotchner, @wowitsel, @elldell1204, @hey-there-angels, @reidabookforonce, @willowrose99, @blameitonthenight21
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Centaurworld Rewrite: A Serious Adventure AU - S1E1 Outline
I’m doing rewrite outlines, prepare for some AU. That being said, I still like several parts of Centaurworld a lot, namely Rider, Horse, Wammawink, and whatever the hell is going on with the Nowhere King, and hope there’s a second season to watch (which I will if Netflix doesn’t ruin our hopes and dreams).
Anyways, here’s like, a rewrite or whatever. I will probably post the outlines as I go, episode by episode. Will I get to them all? ADHD-willing, we’ll see. Also feel free to use these ideas/outlines? I don’t mind. 
Also assume there are songs in this even if I don’t specifically mention all of them. Also I guess this rewrite kinda chains the 1st and 2nd episodes together as a two parter? Maybe, idk.
Also I’ll preface this with this too: I ship Wammahorse, yes I SHIPSHIP it. Moving on.
Some headcanons before we start:
Warworld (*the world Rider and Horse are from) is a Low Fantasy Setting, there IS magic, but it comes in two variations, either very subtle low-powered but relatively uncommon, or Terrifyingly Powerful and so extremely rare to the point that it’s not very well known and “just myths” (usually for Big Baddies)
Ideas for Horse’s Degree of Sapience Prior to Worldhopping:
A: Horse was just a regular, non-magical horse, and their exposure to the Artifact and Centaurworld has essentially made them a Fully Uplifted Animal. - This is interesting, but ultimately a difficult idea to convey because it would require a lot more setup and wouldn’t exactly fit Horse’s characterization without some rework. This is an amazing idea, but I won’t be using it because it would slow things down too much.
B: Horse is a low-fantasy magic steed raised as warhorse/war asset, who is much smarter than your average animal steed/companion similar to a DND Ranger’s pets, or Mabari from Dragon Age, or a Ranger Horse from John Flanagan’s ‘Ranger’s Apprentice.’ The combined exposure to the Artifact and Centaurworld could account for her gaining speech and her body expressing limited physical adaptation to Centaurworld’s different physics (her body’s new extended range of motion for example) but of course I’ll be limiting this because having stakes make it more fun imho. This is my favorite, I’m using this.
Horse would’ve been considered a very valuable war asset (trained warhorses are like, historical ferraris, expensive as hell, i can only imagine what low-magical smart warhorses would be valued at), though still ultimately expendable for the war effort like anything else
Let Horse have horse behaviors (*can you tell I haven’t really left my horse phase behind lol)! Nipping and grooming behaviors as affection or warnings, ear positions to indicate mood, grazing to eat, laying down only when truly relaxed, sleeping standing up. COME ON.
Centaurworld is a High Fantasy world with an Absurdist bent but with darker undertones, similar to how Adventure Time is, with an extremely high saturation of magic, maybe you could even theorize that due to the Splitting of the Two Worlds that all the magic is being Dammed up in Centaurworld like a river or reservoir, this could be a future plot thread that could be picked up in a later season.
Basic Changes: 
Durpleton, Glendale, Ched and Zulius are supporting cast, not main
Durpleton is less stupid and more of a Kronk-expy: a little dim but ultimately kind/means well, has at least 1 life skill he’s good at buried in there though for the life of me I can’t think of one right now.
Glendale’s Narrative Framing: Glendale is amazing, but the kleptomania will be allotted ONE (or two) joke mentions but narratively isn’t treated like one after, somehow establish that her kleptomania is directly intertwined with her anxiety levels. Are there other denizens of the Valley that know the Herd? Are they mad at Glendale for stealing things? Does Wammawink have to constantly run interference to cover for Glendale? Probably.
Make Ched look like less of a pointless asshole: Have him show concern for his friends’ safety and his suspicion of outsiders, AKA Horse. If he’s going to be a jerk, at least let it serve a purpose.
Zulius can stay roughly the same - Zulius is great okay, just don’t tell me there’s backstory and then NOT TELL OR SHOW US ANY CLUES about what said backstory/history IS! (other than forcing us infer/project the headcanon[?] that him and Splendib might’ve been exes, from how they act around each other without any other context/visual/or confirming exposition we literally know nothing other than Splendib and him split/had a nasty falling out and Splendib took the glittercats and the career in the divorce.)
S1E1: Hello Rainbow Road
Opening scene in Warworld
If these episodes were allowed to be longer (shuddup it’s my AU), have the scene open with Horse sees Rider comes running out of some underground castle ruin catacombs and ominous roaring and clanging behind her as she deliberately sets off a dungeon booby trap (arrows or fire) she must’ve avoided while dungeon crawling earlier, and Horse runs towards her and circles at a canter and then Rider does a Running Mount (mounting a horse while the horse is in motion) and shoots an arrow at that flies offscreen
Smash cut to the DRAWBRIDGE door falling and Rider and Horse come galloping out while dodging some javelins and arrows and 1.5 seconds later 1-4 armored minotaurs (the lizardmen?) riding some coursers (swift horses or horselike creatures idk have fun) gallop behind in hot pursuit.
WARWORLD CHASE/FIGHT SCENE
Rider and Horse take out 2 of the pursuers on the run have Rider stay on horseback, dodge and make 1 pursuer shoot/javelin another 1 into a nasty-looking fall, and then Rider nails another 1 right through the helmet visor with an arrow. Have Rider throw a smoke bomb or something at the 2 remaining ones trying to catch up.
2 Enemies left but Horse is forced to skid to a stop as the suspension bridge approaches, then a tense moment forced to walk in order to escape safely across the suspension bridge which Rider cuts once they’re across. Maybe have 1 of the minotaur pursuers having been on the bridge somewhat behind them before Rider had to cut the line, sending the enemy hurtling down below. The remaining minotaur scout stares at them ominously from the other side before leaving.
Have Rider breath a sigh of relief
Smash cut to Horse and Rider traveling across a wartorn landscape, start Horse’s internal monologue narrative until they finally get to the hill and see the ruins of their village
Everything from this point to Horse getting transported to Centaurworld is the same as canon
Not Actually a DREAMVISION SEQUENCE: 
Shot/Animated from Horse’s 1st Person POV: Darkness, the sound of whooshing Horse falls, shimmering flash colors [if this were an actual show pls put a Epilepsy warning at the beginning of the ep], then a loud Splash as Horse falls into Dark Water. POV looks down and we see Horse’s front legs and a bottomless abyss below and a then flash of green and off-white from deep below, then look up to see blue light, see the swimming motions of Horse’s front legs and getting closer to the Blue Light
Horse wakes up, blinking, alone (no Durpleton)
Horse gets up looks around, doesn’t see Rider anywhere and starts makes Whinnying sounds (specifically, Whinnying is a social horse call, like specifically going, “Rider where are you!?” in IRL horse)
“And what are you supposed to be?” the “camera” wheels around to see Ched who has landed on Horse just within reach of her tail so Horse lets out a startled squeal (the Horse noise, not the human one) and does that thing where horses use their tails to swat away insects which sends Ched FLYING as Horse’s squealing morphs into her Talking/Yelling “what the heck is going on?!”
Horse does what panicked horses do, she runs
Horse stumbles into meeting Durpleton, who freaks her out more
Meeting kinda the same as canon but with less constant emphasis on reminding the audience that the writer’s can’t write comedy
Wammawink and Horse meet, Ched flies in and goes “hey that asshole kicked my a-I mean attacked me, but I totally beat ‘em.”
Horse tries to leave, discovers the Barrier, tries to get through, fails multiple times, but only 3-4 attempts shown with time passage show by the time of day changing, have Horse’ talking to herself a bit about how utterly weird the talking words thing is, that this is a “human” thing why is this HAPPENING she needs to get back
Waste less time on the visual gags of the Barrier repelling Horse, also get rid of the Tree Catapult scene because it doesn’t jive with Horse being a horse, why do they know how to make a catapult? Also because I hate how it basically shows us that Horse has no physical danger or chance of injury from being FLUNG around like Pokemon’s Team Rocket.
Have the rest of the centaur Herd come up to and talk to Horse while Horse is trying to get through the Barrier, and Horse talks about the outside and her world and doing things, squeeze in some convo about how there’s no (current) war in Centaurworld and how Horse thinks that that “freedom must be nice.” Anyways these conversations are what has Glendale, Zulius and Durpleton at least considering the ups of leaving.
Durpleton: Durpleton approaches Horse alone and asks about where she’s from, what’s home like, expositiony bits for Warworld and how much Horse needs to get herself and the Artifact back to Rider; Horse should say something offhand, like how she dreamed about exploring the world with Rider after the War seeing new things together, to which we’d cut to a shot of Durpleton looking thoughtful, before asking a completely unrelated question before Horse asks to be left alone. He doesn’t go originally, but gets distracted by something (butterfly?) and trots off.
Wammawink, Ched & Glendale: Atop a hill, Wammawink looks up to see stormclouds gathering off in the distance and comments that they’re going to be in for some rough weather, then goes over to offer Horse food, but gets distracted by some other Valley Denizens who are mad suspicious that Glendale is responsible for something of theirs that’s missing. Leaving Wammawink to go off and have to run interference leaving Glendale to approach Horse alone. Horse will learn that there’s no (current) war in Centaurworld but there was one historically, and Glendale will offhandedly mention that they’ve stolen everything from everyone in the Valley at least 4 times and with the unspoken implication of boredom. Ched will butt in and heckle Horse like, “could you leave any quieter?” and Horse sniping back, ears pinned back and animated horse stress behaviors. And Horse’s last failed attempt at passing the Barrier has them drop the Artifact, and we get a shot of Glendale spotting and eyes widening at seeing the Artifact unattended on the ground, then we get a smash cut of Glendale getting herded away by Ched.
Zulius: Goes over to ask about Horse’s avante garde accessories (her bridle, saddle & armor[barding]), makes comments on her style/aesthetic and asks where he could find some. Horse loses her patience, and says that she Needs to concentrate on getting back to someone they care a lot about and could you please just go away? 
Horse: (voiced as a rhetorical question) “Haven’t you ever wanted to go back to someone you loved before?”
Zulius gets a Look on his face, then he’d puff up, cover up the Armor Piercing Question’s effect on him with more bluster and then turn away as it gets later
Around sunset, Horse finally gives in to go ask Wammawink what’s up, and how can they leave.
Wammawink tries to feed them and convince them to stay, but Horse waves her off and moves away while muttering something about coming up with a plan
Speaking of plans, the Herd excluding Wammawink (& Ched) start talking about being bored, and mention Horse saying stuff about exploring the world (taken out of context, deliberately)
Wammawink, smelling the ugly head of discontent, sighs in defeat at not being able to recruit this new outcast in the Herd and approaches a grazing Horse and says she’ll help her through it with her magic(not admitting that the Barrier is her magic working in the first place because it’s not relevant right now okay) but then we get the “What’s magic?” bit from Horse and the rest of the Herd butts in with the Song. They wander off to go to bed afterwards, and Horse wants to go Now but Wammawink says that she’ll help Horse leave the Barrier but only in the morning because “you look tired”
Horse: “That doesn’t matter.” *awkward silence*
Wammawink, sadly: “Of course it does.” *Horse has already walked away*
The sun finishes setting as the wind blows the plants and through Wammawink’s fur (ominously) and she shivers, going back to the campfire
DREAM SEQUENCE: It’s dark, then we get a flashback dream of a younger Rider and Horse, idk a memory of something to showcase them either while in training or really show their Bond okay? End with them sitting around a campfire with other young soldiers and horses, someone is humming something (the first few bars of the Nowhere King’s Lullaby, no actual words yet). Then Dream!Rider turns to face Horse and asks, “how could you?”
Horse: “How could I what?”
Dream!Rider: “How could you leave me behind?” (The humming grows louder, there’s a lute being played, growing discordant)
Then Horse starts calling into the darkness/void, “I’m coming back for you, Rider! Just hang on, alright?!”
Rider: “Oh Horse, it’s already too late for me.”
“Rider!” Horse yells as they jolt awake, standing, because horses typically sleep standing up.
It’s dawn but the wind and stormy weather signs are picking up but not here yet, Wammawink walks Horse to the edge of the Valley barrier and tries to convince Horse to stay here where it’s safe, but Horse refuses to be deterred
Brief shot of Glendale hiding a bunch of things from her Tummy Hammerspace in order to simulate the feeling of stealing things again later, including the Artifact which falls on the ground
A shot of Durpleton seeing and picking up the Artifact and spotting Wammawink and Horse some distance away going toward the barrier’s edge
Wammawink hangs back on a hill, glowy hands and the magic wall flickers and disappears, and Horse immediately breaks into a gallop and disappears into the forest, Wammawink sighs and turns away
Indeterminate amount of time later, Wammawink recasts the Barrier, and Durpleton misses breakfast so Wammawink enlists Ched to help her look for him because Ched can fly
Cut to a shot of Horse dropping from a canter to a trot on the Rainbow Road, it’s grown darker and the stormclouds are in the sky. Distant thunder booms overhead, and a few scattered raindrops start to fall
“Heyyyy! You forgot your necklaceeee!” a shout from behind
Horse looks back and sees a running Durpleton holding the Artifact, and stops, he catches up to Horse and is gasping, “Wow, you run fast, hoooo, *deep breaths* you’re really *another gasp* athletic! Anyways you forgot your Necklace.”
Durpleton ties the broken string into a necklace around Horse’s neck and Horse thanks them and wishes them a safe journey back to the Valley, but as this happens the rain gradually falls harder. Then the sounds of the Rest of the Herd finally catching up happen, and Wammawink mother hens Durpleton and wants take everyone back home but then a loud BOOM of thunder and lightning overhead, and then it starts to Pour down rain, forcing Horse and co to find shelter until it lets up. Maybe have someone mention something about landslides being a possibility? Durpleton asks how they found them so fast, dim remember, then brief flashback.
FLASHBACK: Wammawink and co searching and calling out for Durpleton everywhere in the Valley, and realize that he must’ve followed Horse for some reason when Zulius FINALLY shows up and mentions that he remembers Durpleton saying he was gonna give Horse back her necklace. The recast Barrier is brought down and they leave the Valley to bring back their friend.
Back to the present where the group has taken shelter as the storm picks up more, and thunder booms overhead, Horse has some nervous horse body language going on, then we get to hear her mutter-singing or humming the “I never fear the drums of war” to calm herself down, but with more stanzas please, when asked she says it’s a battle hymn that Rider sang.
If Horse was humming, Wammawink could ask why she doesn’t sing, she’s sure that Horse has a lovely voice
Horse goes “I’m a horse, I don’t sing.”
Wammawink tries to be encouraging, Horse is resistant
Wammawink invites her to eat (AGAIN) but Horse still turns her (love and affection) down (AGAIN!) and says she’s fine with grazing and Glendale pipes in excitedly that they have decided that they want to travel with Horse (Ched pipes up that he didn’t agree to this) but pls help us convince Wammawink and Horse protests but someone points out to ask “do you even know where you’re going” and they have a point
Horse acknowledges this and relents, states some stuff about how she’s not going to slow down much however. Then Glendale, Zulius and Durpleton rejoice, Ched acts tsundere, but Wammawink looks nervous and wrings her hands together and relents that “they’ll go with Horse as far as the nearest Shaman” and Ched will go, “hey don’t you know he-” and Wammawink shushes him quickly with a gigglecake
Wammawink doubles down on the mother henning behavior
Horse doesn’t eat Wammawink’s gigglecakes but grazes by herself nearby, occasionally answering a question or two when engaged by the others (not Wammawink) and Wammawink mentions how the weather probably won’t let up for very long and they should take it slow and that Horse should bundle up
Horse disagrees but its bedtime and a bedtime song occurs in the backdrop as a restless Horse struggles to stay alert and awake but eventually falls asleep
VISION SEQUENCE: A shimmer of soft blue light, then shots of Rider ducking and weaving, her sword flashing as she tries to weave her way through a horde of enemy soldiers, blood spatters, then an enemy archer takes aim at a fleeing Rider, and Horse calls out a warning. 
Rider turns her head with a surprised look on her face suddenly just enough that the arrow buries itself into her shoulder instead the middle of her back and then she stumbles, one of her arms going limp, but everything goes dark before we can see if she fell
Everything goes dark and the din of war fades away, we get a shot of Horse’s hooves splashing and making ripples into dark water but the camera doesn’t follow her, we hear Horse’s cries for Rider fade, growing further and further away
Still dark, but in the silence we hear distant sound, drip, drip, drip, drip.
Then the episode ends and the credits roll.
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stellocchia · 3 years
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I just wanted to analize the conversation between Foolish and Tommy for a bit because I’m still thinking about it
I did technically intend for this to be a short little thing with just a couple of my thoughts on it but... brevity is NOT my strong suit!
So I put everything under the cut and obviously it’s all about the characters.
You can find the conversation here at 02:52:55 and onwards
What is extremely interesting about this whole conversation is that Foolish is mostly unaware of what happened prior to him joining and about most things that happened afterwards, meaning he has as detached and objective of an opinion as you can get. For example Foolish doesn’t know almost anything about L’Manburg, as it was destroyed before he joined and he also didn’t know that Tommy went in the prison to kill Dream (which is why he asks how that went when Tommy mentions it). That paired together with the fact that Foolish has proven to be quite a good listener is probably the reason why Tommy felt so comfortable opening up with him.
���No what do you mean you fought Dream?” “Well you know... you’ve seen Wilbur haven’t you?” “No, no actually” (as I said, completely unaware, though he did seem a bit worried at the idea of Tommy fighting Dream)
“Ghostbur’s uhm... Ghostbur’s not here anymore” “Oh did he pack up? Move out? Got bored? He seems like a free spirit” “Yeah he moved out to this little train station far far away. There’s a little train station, you know? Right near the world border. There’s a little train station” “Oh that’s cool! I wanna see that sometimes" (...) “There’s a little train station out near the world border and Ghostbur went but he left Friend” “He left Friend?!” “But we’ll get Friend to him soon, ‘cause then they’ll all be happy”
Tommy’s way of explaining things to others is always so fascinating to me. It’s childish and charged with emotions, but I don’t mean this negatively, because it gets the point across better then any grand and eloquent speaches really could in my opinion. How attached he was to Ghostbur is also extremely sweet and this is simply his way of dealing with grief: trying to find a practical solution (he was suggested to Tubbo to wash up and now his solution is bringing Friend to Ghostbur), trying to find something he can do to make things better.
“How much can you take Foolish? Blood! Blood! Does that upset you?” (it’s nice seeing Tommy being mindful of other people’s triggers since not many people are mindful with his)
“All I know is I’m proving that bitch [Wilbur] wrong! Because he told me- he told me I’m weak” (another example that the manipulation did work to some extent)
“I don’t feel comfortable talking about that [his revival] with you Foolish if I’m honest” “No, fair enough!” (and Foolish repaying the favour right after)
“I don’t really se how this solves the problem” “Well it doesn’t ‘solve’ the problem, it’s preventing the problem Foolish, alright? Have you noticed that all the problems come they don’t get solved, do they? Ends up with some madman screaming ‘I solved it’ alright? And now- and then look at him, alright, now he’s taken away everyone’s favourite man: Ghostbur, alright? Problems don’t really get solved in this server”
So, for context Foolish was commenting on how gathering stone didn’t seem like a good solution for Tommy to prove to Wilbur that he wasn’t weak, but Tommy’s answer is about more then that. There isn’t much he can do at the moment, not knowing what Wilbur is planning, so the only thing he CAN do for now is what he was asked and, hopefully, prove himself to Wilbur so that he may be able to stop Wilbur from committing atrocities before he starts. Also the “madman” he’s talking about could be Dream (the one who thinks he is a God and actually killed Ghostbur) as well as Sam (the one who thought the prison was gonna be a solution to the Dream problem and who let Ghostbur die) or it could be Wilbur (who seems so self assured about being right on everything and is now the one who replaced Ghostbur), any of them fits. It is also true that, so far, every problem that seemed to have been “solved” turned out to be far from it every single time. That said, of course it should not be Tommy’s responsability to get Wilbur on the “right path” nor should he bear sole responsability for avoiding disaster once more, but, by now, he’s convinced that that’s not the truth, probably because he sees himself as far more sacrificable then those around him.
“Well, how do we go about changing that [problems not getting solved]?” “That’s what I’m doing” “By gathering stone?” “No what I’m doing my friend is preventing the problem before it gets out of hand like it did before, alright?” (again, it’s all about prevention now through getting Wilburs trust and maybe steering him in the correct path)
“L’manburg! This was mine and Wilbur’s na- it was Wilbur’s nation! It was Wilbur’s which makes it all the more heart wrenching, alright?” (referring to his talk with Wilbur about L’Manburg, which does make it more heart wrenching)
“Now we were okay- I was okay when we were banished and I knew that we’d get it back and we’d talk about it, right? As you said: ‘peace is the option’. But here’s the thing Foolish, Wilbur didn’t wanna do anymore talking, he’d given up with that, because some people aren’t strong enough, alright, some people stop talking. You know the phrase ‘treat others how you wanna be treated’ Foolish? That’s a very important phrase (...) Wilbur disregarded that rule. He decided that he wanted to be treated poorly so he’d treat everyone else poorly” “Why do you think that?” “Honestly sometimes I don’t really know myself”
So a very interesting thing that emerged from this conversation is that Tommy has a much better understanding of Wilbur then most people originally assumed and he is possibly the only person (in universe) who has picked up on the fact that all of Wilburs “villain speaches” and behaviours were nothing more then him treating others like he thought he himself deserved to be treated, like sh*t. It’s also interesting that Tommy relates the concept of strenght here once again both with the ability to stay peaceful and, this time, also the ability to communicate properly with those you care about (probably because this are both things he himself lacked when he considered himself to be at his worst, meaning in exile and later with Techno). It is also to be noted though that, while Tommy is undoubtedly the one person who understand Wilbur best, he is still not aware of how bad his spiral had gotten because Wilbur never communicated it.
“Now Wilbur, he was a good man- he IS a good man, deep inside him, alright?” “So you’re saying that there’s still redemption for him?” “Well he’s been a good man deep inside him, but he’s been a bad guy for a very very long time” (Short introduction to Tommy’s concept of “good” or “bad” in season 3. He has gotten a lot more nuanced over time realizing that the world isn’t simply black or white)
“You believe in second chances?” “No I don’t. I don’t really believe- I- that’s not a thing for me Foolish, is just that... *sigh* I believe that everyone has got a little bit of good in them. And I know that Wilbur had good in him” (A little bit more about his concept of morality, this time explaining that he doesn’t really believe in giving people a quantifiable number of “chances”, but more so in the fact that everyone has capacity for good, which also implies that everyone has capacity for bad, but he chooses to hang onto the first one for those he cares about)
“Now I just think Wilbur’s being a bad guy, and that’s okay! We’re all bad guys, everyone messes up. You learn the most from your mistakes” (he also moved on from the fear of becoming a “bad guy” now it seems by noticing that your mistakes don’t define you as a person and that they are opportunities to better yourself)
“He’s made sooo many mistakes, so many that have hurt so many people, but, what this is gonna be about isn’t giving him a second chance, isn’t giving him a third chance, is not about chances! Foolish, it’s about not giving up on the people you care about”
And this is the culmination of all the previous point. The idea of chances implies that you’re gonna give up at some point if the person doesn’t changes (which is a healthy thing to do, by the way, sometimes it’s better to cut people off when they aren’t good for you) and Tommy doesn’t believe in that. He believes that everyone has some good in them and perhaps, if you stick by them long enough, that good may shine threough. Now this is a nice concept in theory, but in reality if people wanna change it has to start from themselves (wether that be changing an opinion or needing to reach out for help) and it’s especially not a good idea to stick by someone if they are harmful to you. I’m sure no one likes Wilbur being in this example, so think what would happen if Tommy applied the same mentality to, say, Dream, someone who has hurt him more then anyone else and who considers him less then human (more like his propriety) and who’s most probably never gonna change since he never regretted anything he did: would you still think that the idea of “never give up on people if you care about them” would be a positive one? This sadly is an example of excessive selflessness on Tommy’s part that ends up being self-destructive.
“You consider yourself to be the ‘good guy’ or the ‘bad guy’?” “That really depends who you ask, doesn’t it? You know? You ask Dream he’s say I’m- he’d say I’m his little- I’m his little play- his little toy that he plays with, you know, it doesn’t- Foolish honestly I used to consider myself the ‘good guy’, the fucking second in command going around going ‘yeah let’s do this!’ but I- recently- this past- this past like six months or so Foolish everything got so much harder then it was before, but because before it was us fighting the bad guys and everything was so clear, it was all so clear! But it’s not been clear for so long”
A few things to unpack here: Tommy once again demonstrating quite a bit of awareness that he didn’t always have about Dream and how he now views him (this has been a gradual and difficult realization for him and it is still clearly hard for him to talk about it) and then explaining that things simply got more complicated then they once were (which is an important thing to keep in mind, because Wilbur missed all of that, he missed the world becoming shades of gray) and that he really doesn’t believe in ‘bad guys’ or ‘good guys’ any longer.
“It seems like you’ve been the hero, you’ve been the viallian, the conquerer, the saviour and, even now, I still have no idea of what you exactly are” “It’s up to you to decide, isn’t it?”
Now this can be interpreted in a few different ways. It could be that Tommy has simply given up in tring to define himself since others keep insisting in putting him into small little boxes that don’t fit him. It could be that he simply refuses the labels and leaves it up to others to decide what he is in relation to them. Or it could be something else entirely and I’m leaving it up to you to decide.
“Unlike you I don’t really have a choice. I have to try and be who I want to be, ‘cause if I don’t... very bad things are gonna happen on this server. Now Wilbur’s back Foolish I can’t- quite frankly no one can risk that, so I don’t really have a choice”
And this is how it ends on a quite hopeless note actually. By this point the responsability to solve problems has been put on his shoulders so many times that he doesn’t really think he has a choice any longer and he also recognizes Wilbur as a genuine threat to the server as a whole if left alone.
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kantrips · 3 years
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Alistair & Celia Headcanon Collection
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Some Amell x Alistair (largely fluff) headcanons! Includes some from Origins, Warden time at Amaranthine and the Inquisition-era. Some of these I have had since my first playthrough, but others I may have read elsewhere, loved and thusly absorbed so please let me know if I can link anyone!
Origins
The first time they meet at Ostagar, Celia thinks Alistair is the most fascinating person she has ever encountered because no one in the Circle had a particularly boisterous sense of humour. Alistair is oblivious to her heart eyes, and also holds back because he’s worried she won’t survive the Joining.
Even after the Joining, Alistair tries very hard not to ~feel feelings~ despite the clear signals Celia is hurling at him because he assumes she won’t like him once she gets to know him more/she will get bored of him/ she will leave like everyone else i.e. the boy is hecking damaged.
Celia laughs obnoxiously hard at all Alistair’s jokes because a) she finds them unexpected, and b) because, like a dork, she wants to prove she gets the punch line. Alistair is perplexed by her reactions at first, and cautiously wonders if she is mocking him. Once he realises she is genuinely amused, it bolsters his ego significantly. 
Celia has no concept of personal space and sits and walks very close to everyone. There wasn’t a lot of room at the Circle so she forgets she can spread out. Morrigan makes it clear she needs to back off (Celia doesn’t need telling twice) but Alistair is more relaxed and gets used to it quickly after the confusion of the first night when she blithely sets up her bedroll right next to his. Alistair assumes she is a bit scared of sleeping in the forest but really she is just accustomed to the need to cram as many apprentice bunks into a room as possible.
In a way, Alistair is also used to sharing small spaces (Chantry and Wardens) so it doesn’t bother him at all when Celia chooses to sit pressed against his side, walks so their arms bump together, or unconsciously brushes an eyelash from his cheek. He quickly grows to like her overfamiliarity (for some reason…).
Similarly, Alistair eats Celia’s leftover food if she can’t finish it or doesn’t like it, even before they’re a couple. She just offers one day and after that it becomes a given. The others side-eye them but they are happily oblivious.   
Celia gets in trouble from the rest of the party for getting distracted yelling encouragement and cheering Alistair during combat. In turn, Alistair gets in trouble for turning around mid-battle to thank her when she buffs or heals him. Morrigan advises that if they are both so determined to get killed, she is more than happy to assist with hastening the process.
Celia’s mabari, Trevor, is quickly accepting of Alistair and his proximity to Celia because he observes Alistair protecting Celia in battle and thusly deems him to be a ‘good dog’ and considers that they are equals in the pack.
Alistair and Celia vandalise each other’s wanted posters whenever they come across them. It gets competitive.
Celia doesn’t really want to be in charge of saving the world but has three things working in her favour: 1) she absolutely hates letting people down 2) has an intense need to finish what she starts 3) she is in possession of a bossy streak.
That said she spends the entire Blight screaming internally to an extent not even Alistair fully grasps.
They go to the Circle Tower first, because Celia thinks she will have the best chance of getting help from people she knows and is also ‘homesick’ in the sense that she is very glad to be free of the place, but stressed enough with everything going on to crave something familiar even if she resents it. The events there devastate her. Along with the loss of friends and mentors she has known since childhood, being trapped by herself in the fade particularly terrifies her as she has never truly been alone for so long before in her life. It reminds her of the Harowing which totally blindsided her. She is very teary, untalkative and introspective for some time afterwards, but both Trevor and Alistair have the correct instinct to stay close without trying to interact with her which she finds incredibly comforting.
Accustomed to making potions, Celia will not under any circumstances deviate from a recipe while cooking, whereas Alistair just chucks everything in to use up leftovers and see what happens. Alistair gets meals together super quickly whereas Celia takes forever. A little unfairly, Celia is perceived as the better cook because she produces very consistent meals, while Alistair’s experiments sometimes do work, and sometimes don’t, with people tending to focus on the disasters rather than the successes. Meanwhile Celia is rather: “should I add half a sprig of rosemary? No I mustn’t: it would be far too daring!” so everyone learns to tip their own seasonings into their bowl before even tasting her food.
When they’re travelling and walking for days on end, Alistair and Celia make up a lot of games in the vein of ‘I spy’ and ‘would you rather?’ They can occasionally persuade others to participate though no one enjoys them or gets quite as invested as Celia and Alistair (who are actual children).
A game stops abruptly one day when Celia guilelessly asks if Alistair would rather be Emperor of Orlais or King of Fereldan and he gets extremely defensive and answers, “Neither.” Having no context for this reaction (yet), Celia (a stickler for the rules) pushes him, insisting his answer isn’t allowed and that he’s cheating until Alistair gets grouchy, stomps off and refuses to play anything for days. 
Celia figures he must be overtired, but his unhappy reaction does come back to her later at the Landsmeet and contributes to her already firm resolve not to put him on the throne.
When bored, Alistair also periodically asks Celia to, “Do a trick!” with her magic and she usually obliges with something small and silly which Wynne always scolds them for (but they continue to do anyway).
Celia does not like Eamon one bit and makes it clear from their first meeting. Alistair actually gets a bit annoyed at her because she is polite to 99% of the other people they meet and he can’t understand what her problem is. Celia won’t say because she doesn’t want to drive Alistair away so she remains coldly civil towards Eamon and commences a long, looong process of nudging Alistair towards having the realisation himself that a) Eamon is manipulative, selfish and cruel and b) Alistair deserves better.
Celia wants to collect some of the books they find which is not practical given they are constantly travelling, but Alistair carries as many as he can in his pack and suffers in silence for it, ultimately finding it worth it for her enthusiastic gratitude.
Celia cuts Alistair’s hair and does a very respectable job after weeks of him complaining it’s flopping in his eyes (they used to cut each other’s hair in the Circle). Zevran pretends she did an awful job, gasping in horror at Alistair’s appearance, much to Celia’s ire. Alistair (internally weeping) tries to be brave until he can check his reflection in some plate mail and see it is fine.
Celia is very naïve about how the ‘real world’ works having been at the Circle since she was a child. This is especially evident in Denerim and Alistair has to explain how money works and grab her before she wanders down dicey looking alleyways.
Alistair nearly dissolves into a paroxysm of agony when he points out his favourite type of cheese at the Denerim Markets and (accustomed to the very limited range of bland foods provided at the Circle) Celia innocently asks, “There is more than one type of cheese?” Alistair makes it his mission to educate her. She doesn’t like most of what he feeds her but doesn’t say so to protect his feelings given he seems to take the matter so incredibly personally.
Leliana convinces Celia to sing one evening at the campfire. She’s breathy with a very limited range but manages okay, and Leliana plays and harmonises in support. Watching on with a goofy smile plastered over his face, Alistair comments to the surrounding companions about how talented she is and they’re like “…she’s really not mate.”
When they both wake up from a blightmare (or Celia has one and wakes Alistair with her flailing) they sneak about and eat anything they can find then sit up and have massive deep & meaningfuls (i.e. in the spirit of going for a long drive with a friend or being in the garden with someone outside a party and spilling your guts). Eventually they start blaming the depleted food stores on Leliana’s nug, Schmooples, much to Leliana’s displeasure.
Given Celia usually responds so well to his jokes, Alistair gets a bit peeved when Celia starts replying to some of his more severely self-deprecating humour with an unamused, “No you’re not,” or, “That’s not true.” He defensively argues it’s just a joke, but he does stop doing it so much as time goes on.
Celia is SO excited when Alistair gives her the rose. She never in her life thought she would be the recipient of a proper ~romantic gesture~…however she accidentally sits on the rose about five minutes after she gets it. Celia is devastated. There is a lot of panic and tears and she keeps one petal pressed in a book but has to unceremoniously ditch the rest in secret.
Celia doesn’t tell Alistair about this until years later and she’s terrified he’ll be hurt but he just laughs because he was so worried he was going to be the one to squash it and then she destroyed it basically the minute she got it. Alistair acknowledges it was an impractical gift given their situation. Celia gets mad and says it was a PERFECT gift and is annoyed at how funny he finds it given this has been a crushing, guilty secret hanging over her for years.
Following this, every time Alistair gives her any kind of gift, he can’t help but throw in a ‘Don’t sit on it!” and cracks himself up, especially when Celia gets grumpy about it and accuses him of spoiling the moment. It happens so often that when Alistair chooses a horse for her and plans to teach her to ride, Celia manages to cut him off with, “Yes, I know Alistair: I can sit on this one,” and steals his thunder.
Alistair periodically says Celia’s name just to check if she’ll answer, especially after a long period of quiet or to see if she’s awake à la screaming in the chantry because it’s so silent. When she responds he says, “Nothing” or “Never mind” but he finds it vaguely comforting just to hear her reply and it’s a habit he never loses, even when they have been together for years and he is much less isolated generally. Alistair doesn’t realise he’s doing it, and it never happens frequently enough for Celia to notice: she just assumes he has lost his train of thought.
They sometimes conspire to purposely fall to the back of the group while on the road so that they can hold hands. Everyone knows full well what they are doing, but Alistair and Celia think they are being incredibly ~sneaky~.
The first time they sleep together they laugh. A lot. Before, during and after.
Alistair snores loudly but only when he’s on his back. Celia is used to the noise of people sleeping around her at the Circle so it doesn’t bother her and she doesn’t want to disturb him because she knows he needs the rest.
When they are known to be sharing a tent however, their companions will slap on the walls of it and demand she kick him until he stops snoring. Celia will relent and gently prod and nudge Alistair until he rolls over with a bit of sleepy grumbling.
I think everyone has this headcanon to the point it is basically actual canon HOWEVER I am legally obligated to include it: Alistair is a professional body heat distributor and Celia drastically cuts down on the number of blankets she uses once they are sleeping together. If she stands in front of him on cold days, he understands the non-verbal signal and will automatically wrap her in his cloak.
Also might as well be canon: Alistair likes to be the little spoon. He doesn’t say, but Celia knows.
Decidedly not a fluff one (you can skip to Amaranthine to avoid) but the ritual with Morrigan fairly significantly messes Alistair up (both the act itself and his consideration of the repercussions i.e. Kieran). He’s jubilant and relieved at their victory over the Archdemon, but in the background struggles to process and there is some fallout once the victory celebrations lull and he has time to fully register what happened. Alistair grapples with a lot of guilt, disgust and confusion. He doesn’t know how to express it or where to direct his emotions so it mainly manifests as self-loathing. He wants to talk to Celia about it but can’t articulate his feelings which makes him feel worse.
Celia tries to comfort him, but he needs space on and off for a long while after and she gives him it. She feels a lot of guilt too, and never stops wondering how much it was actually his choice to do the ritual, worrying that she made him feel like he had to do it. Eventually they discuss it openly and honestly, which eases both of their minds somewhat, but it takes a long time to get to a point where they can talk on the subject. Meeting Kieran at Skyhold also helps Alistair down the line, though it’s obviously painful.
Amaranthine & Inquisition
Alistair keeps an eye out for people struggling, especially new recruits who are having trouble fitting in. He takes them under his wing and is very good at building people up and making sure everyone is included. He’ll just start enthusiastically greeting people like they are his best friend and squeezing himself onto the bench next to them at meals until everyone else follows suit.
For recruits that don’t respond well to his ‘mother hen’ type attention, Celia is good at assigning tasks that specifically highlight their strengths and builds their confidence/sense of purpose which also gains them the respect of their peers.
Alistair has been known to stand behind Celia while she is giving mundane orders/making speeches and pull faces or impersonate her, turning stony and impassive when she spins around accusingly because people are laughing.  
But if anyone else talks smack about her he gets very, “Sorry mate, just to clarify was that comment directed at my wife, your Commander, the hERO OF FERELDAN, VANQUISHER OF AN ARCHDEMON!? That’s lucky, I didn’t THINK IT LIKELY. Because that wouldn’t be WISE, would it now?” etc. with some loud, fake laughter and firm backslapping for the worst offenders.
The plan for them to part ways so that Celia can search for a cure goes very badly, especially because Celia (under a lot of stress and not coping™) eventually devolves into, “I’m in charge and I say so,” which is a big betrayal of their agreements both to stay together, and make decisions together on equal footing. She realises this and takes it back but Alistair is demoralised and gives in with a bit of petty, sarcastic reverence e.g. saluting and, “Whatever you say boss, don’t know why I dared to utter an opinion how foolish of me...” so they still part on slightly strained terms, even after later mutually apologising and trying to make the most of their time together before they go.
Both regret the argument during their separation and write horribly soppy letters to each other, but something still feels uncomfortably unresolved until they are together again. They pine. So much. It’s disgusting and cliched. There is considerable sighing and staring at the moon or deep into tankards, very much to the ire of those around them. Alistair can be particularly annoying: “This roll reminds me of my wife...she eats bread sometimes...”
After Celia sends the letter to the Inquisitor, she writes to Leliana directly along the lines of, “I know it was incredibly subtle but I wanted to check: did they get the message? That I will destroy them if Alistair gets hurt?” and Leliana replies in the vein of, “Hon, it wasn’t even remotely subtle ffs…”
When reunited, though ecstatic and nearly delirious with joy and relief, it takes a while to rebuild the trust they once had, especially for Alistair. There’s an unfamiliar awkwardness that flares up unexpectedly, but it doesn’t last and they’re both fully committed to each other and to staying together permanently this time.
Celia and Alistair have a conversation recapping everything that happened while they were apart in which Celia is all, “Poor Hawke. Honestly I’m shocked you didn’t do something obscenely idiotic like try and sacrifice yourself thank the Maker for that…” and Alistair is there, nervously sweating, looking for an exit, loosening his collar etc.
As they settle back into their old routines Alistair will occasionally blurt out things like, “I really like having breakfast with you,” and then berate himself internally for how trite that sounds but Celia replies on cue, “I love waking up next to you and the way you groan when you stretch your back out and the way you check your hair twice before you leave the room and the way you complain if I don’t eat my crusts and the way you still hold my hand when we’re walking...” and basically they’re just blissfully happy being comfortably domestic and even as they get older they are forever just teenagers in love.
The Wardens at Amaranthine acquire/receive a griffon egg and the hatchling imprints on Alistair and decides he is their mother. It can’t cope with separation, crying constantly if Alistair goes out of sight, and won’t let anyone else feed or handle it so Alistair carries them in a sling 24/7. He gets to give orders and run training sessions with the tiny griffon occasionally poking its head out just to glare at everyone.
Whenever the baby griffon squeaks, Alistair automatically replies, “Well said,” or “Excellent point, Ser Beaksly” with a totally straight face.
For the first few months, Celia gets nipped or scratched if she approaches Alistair unless he wraps the griffon up. It so badly wants to fight her. Celia is permitted to sleep in her own bed, as long as the griffon sleeps curled on Alistair’s chest and Celia doesn't try anything outrageous like touching her husband even fleetingly. It gets a little frustrating as the months drag on, but the image of Alistair with the sling over his armour, or with the griffon snuggling possessively around his neck staring daggers at everyone, is so entertaining that Celia can’t get truly annoyed about it. As the griffon gets older it does learn to tolerate other people and becomes more independent but remains very protective of Alistair and favours him above all others. Insert the ‘Ah yes. Me. My husband. And his thousand pound murder-bird-cat child’ meme here.
Modern AU Bonus Round
They share headphones while commuting.
They occasionally end up wearing sort of matching outfits, mostly unintentionally.
They consistently refer to their dog, Trevor, as their son to the point that people who aren’t familiar with them assume that they actually have a child.
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silhouetteofacedar · 3 years
Text
Fox Mulder, Closet Romantic Ch. 5: Dana's Work Friend
Previous Chapter - AO3 - MSR, rated E
Friday, April 3rd, 1998. Scully comes into the office in a flurry of coat and red hair. She doesn’t greet him, just drops her briefcase on the desk and sinks into her seat across from him.
“Mulder, I have a favor to ask of you, and you’re probably going to hate it, so just bear in mind that I have exhausted all my other options,” she says, somewhat breathless.
“You’re really selling it,” he deadpans. “What is it?” he asks, settling into his chair and leaning his elbows on the desk.
“You remember Mark,” she prompts, and he nods. Ugh. If only he could forget.
“Well, it turns out that Mark is extremely - almost agonizingly - social, despite having a demanding job and a young child to raise.”
“Sounds awful,” Mulder comments.
“Hence my current predicament. He’s invited me and my friends out for drinks tonight, so his friends can meet me and I can meet his and he can meet mine… “ she rambles before refocusing herself. “He’s not aware that I’ve lost contact with most of my friends. You’re kind of the only one left.”
Mulder had suspected as much, but confirmation of her increasing social isolation is like a punch in the throat. “Are you sure there’s no one else?” he asks softly, not wanting to rub salt into any wounds.
She shakes her head, lips pressed together. “Unless the Lone Gunmen count as my friends,” she replies. “Which in this case is somehow worse than having none at all,” she muses, some humor in her voice.
“Good point,” he chuckles. “Sure, count me in.”
“Thank you,” she says sincerely, and he melts all over again. He’d do anything for her. Even if it means meeting Mark. Ugh.
“It’s worth mentioning,” Mulder says after a moment, “If you don’t want to go, you can always just not go.”
“Shockingly, I have thought of that,” she says dryly, opening her briefcase and pulling out a folder. “But I think it would be good for me to meet people and hold conversations that aren’t related to criminal or paranormal activity. Might be good for you, too,” she adds, glancing up at him.
He pulls a stack of files out of his inbox on the desk. “I’ll stick to ‘ghosties and ghoulies and long-leggedy beasties and things that go bump in the night’,” he says.
“‘Good Lord, deliver us',” Scully replies, finishing the old prayer.
Mulder looks up at her and finds her smiling at him, and his whole body flushes with heat and adoration.
“Let’s elope,” he says, and she rolls her eyes fondly before burying her nose in her work.
I’m not kidding, he yells inside the prison of his own thick skull.
After work he and Scully drive straight to the bar together, a yuppie place in Foggy Bottom near George Washington University Hospital.
“Have you ever been through their ER?” Scully asks, scanning the street for parking. “I imagine you’ve been through enough hospitals to warrant a map on the wall with little pins stuck in it.”
“I can’t possibly remember them all at this point,” he says absently, tugging at his seatbelt uncomfortably. Why is he nervous? He’s just here to show Scully’s man friend that she’s not entirely a basement-dwelling hermit.
And Mulder’s the best she could do? God, maybe she really does need to get out more.
She parks, and he feeds the meter while she touches up her lipstick in the rearview mirror. She looks sweet and and rosy, flushed with nerves and traffic, and he could so easily scoop her up and kiss her-
“Alright,” she says, climbing out of the car and closing the driver’s side door a little harder than necessary. She smooths her hair down. “I’m ready for battle.”
“I’m prepared to fall on my sword,” he assures her, guiding her onto the sidewalk with a hand on her lower back before realizing he probably shouldn’t touch her so familiarly when her… friend might see.
“It’ll be fine,” she says over her shoulder as she grasps the bar door’s handle. “Just behave,” she hisses, and they enter.
The onslaught is immediate.
“Dana!” a voice calls out through the bustling bar, and Mulder sees a man waving them over. He’s got neatly styled dishwater blond hair, broad shoulders, and dimples at the corners of his mouth as he smiles at them. Not bad, Mulder thinks, unsure of how to feel about this new information.
He barely has time to process it before they’re enveloped in a tight swarm of strangers. The blond man, presumably Mark, loops an arm around Scully’s shoulders and gives her a side-hug.
“So glad you could make it, Dana,” he says, and proceeds to go around the circle of people and rattle off names Mulder has no reason to remember. Instead, he watches Scully, the way she greets each person as they’re introduced. She’s cool and calm, smiling politely, shaking hands and saying ‘nice to meet you’ to each of the five - no, six - people in the group.
“I’ll grab you two some drinks,” Mark says, glancing at Mulder. “What’s your poison?”
“Shiner,” Mulder says.
“Same for me,” Scully says. “I’m going to freshen up-”
“Sure,” Mark says, giving her shoulders a squeeze. “Two Shiner Bocks coming up.”
That’s how Mulder and this exuberant, Golden Retriever of a man end up sitting at the bar together, nursing sweaty beers and waiting for Scully to return from the bathroom.
“So you’re a work friend of Dana’s?” Mark asks over the noise of the bar.
Mulder was about to set his drink down, but he reconsiders and takes another swig. “In a manner of speaking,” he replies.
Dr. Mark Whatever-the-fuck seems confused. “I don’t follow,” he says.
“I’m her partner,” Mulder says flatly. Since 1993. I’ve seen her naked, cradled her injured body my arms, saved her goddamn life. Have you?
“Oh!” Mark says, clearly making mental connections. “Oh. Sorry, I just- it’s nice to meet you… Fox?”
“Just Mulder’s fine,” he corrects him.
Mark laughs. “Sorry for the confusion on my end; I think Dana only said your name once and I went and assumed Fox Mulder was a woman. And you know what they say about assuming,” he adds with a nudge.
Once. Only once? Maybe that shouldn’t surprise him, but it does. Whenever he meets someone new in Scully’s life they always throw out the usual ‘I’ve heard a lot about you’ line, so he knows she talks about him to others. But not to this guy. Why not to this guy?
Mercifully, Scully returns from the restroom. Mark hands her her beer. “Thanks,” she says softly, giving him a small smile with her lips closed tightly, which strikes Mulder as odd. He knows she’s somewhat self-conscious about smiling with her teeth, but something he sees in her face doesn’t feel quite right.
Of course it doesn’t feel right to you, he thinks. She’s smiling at some other guy.
They’re swept along in a current of conversation, scrambled introductions, and drink orders. He’s introduced to a handful of people he’ll selectively erase from his eidetic memory, standing across from Scully in their little circle instead of by her side. He doesn’t like it. Another man has his hand on her back, although respectfully keeping it between her shoulder blades. Any lower and Mulder would have to excuse himself to have a panic attack in the alley behind the bar. Or throw up.
He’s glad Mark’s friends aren’t particularly interested in making conversation with him; he’s tired and ready to go home. Luckily, the Doctor himself calls the night early, at half-past eight.
“I promised the little one I’d be home to tuck her in,” he explains, and Mulder’s stomach turns from the purity and sweetness of it. “She gets to stay up a little later on Fridays.” He gives Scully another half of a hug and says his goodbyes.
The group disperses pretty quickly after Mark leaves, and Mulder and Scully are left alone outside the bar.
“So, you met Mark,” Scully says simply.
“I did, yeah.” He can sense that she wants him to say something more. “He seems... nice,” Mulder adds.
Scully nods. “Yeah, he’s nice.”
Mulder’s beginning to think ‘nice’ is the only word anyone’s capable of using to describe this guy.
“I’ll bet Bill’s gonna love him,” he comments, hoping he doesn’t sound as bitter as he feels.
Scully shakes her head, smiling. “I knew there had to be a flaw in him somewhere,” she jokes.
Mulder surprises himself with a huffed laugh. This moment with her is strangely precious, despite the circumstances. He doesn’t know how many moments like this he has left, if he’s being honest.
“I’m happy for you,” he says tenderly, and maybe if he says it enough it’ll be true. She deserves this, he reminds himself. It’s become almost a mantra, a lead weight that keeps him from drifting away.
“Are you?” she asks, catching him off guard. “I caught you staring holes into him more than once.”
“I wasn’t,” Mulder says defensively. “This is just my face.”
She gives him a look that clearly says ‘I call bullshit’, and he folds. “He didn’t know who I was,” he says, and it sounds monumentally stupid out loud. “He though Fox Mulder was a woman.”
“I-I don’t know why he would have thought that,” Scully says, pensive. “I never implied-”
“Fox is an unusual name,” Mulder interrupts. “It’s an honest mistake if you just hear it without any context.”
Scully looks down at her feet. “I’m sorry about that,” she says softly. “About all of this. I owe you one.”
Mulder reaches out and squeezes her shoulder, and it seems to have a grounding effect on both of them. “I’ll put it on your tab,” he says.
“Do you want me to drive you back to work?” she asks. They’d left his car in the garage at the Hoover building.
Mulder shakes his head. “You’re almost home,” he says. “I’ll get a cab.”
He ends up walking instead.
The night air cleanses his senses as he makes the half-hour trek back to the Bureau. Their time in the bar had felt sluggish and hazy, despite the fact that he only had a beer and a half. He spend the entire evening focused on Scully, the only sharp image amidst the blur of patrons.
Mark hadn’t kissed Scully goodbye, and Mulder’s relief at not having to witness it was overshadowed by a morbid curiosity. She and Mark had been dating for three weeks; he’s not sure how often they’ve actually gone out, due to the doctor’s shift schedule, but he assumes they’ve seen each other a few times at mass in addition to whatever outings they’ve gone on in the evenings. That was ample time to get to know each other physically on some level, wasn’t it? A peck on the cheek at least.
Mulder’s biased; he’s touch-starved and in love with her. He spends most of his nights on his couch in the dark, touching himself and thinking about Scully. Kissing her, taking her clothes off, tasting her; his mental catalogue of scenarios is robust and well-used. If given half the chance to love her…
Maybe that’s it, he thinks somberly, stepping over sidewalk cracks. Maybe chances are taken, not given.
That’s not how he wants to love her. He wants her to choose him all on her own, and yet he never let her know he was a choice. And now there’s Mark.
But Mark doesn’t kiss her.
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ouyangzizhensdad · 3 years
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Do you think that making Chinese food is cultural appropriation? I'm white and started making some of the foods I saw in the shows I've watched since the untamed, but now I'm worried I'm appropriating the culture.
Hi anon,
As a fellow white person, I am also someone who needs to critically reflect on how I engage with different cultures. I can't give you the definitive answer you seek, the clear absolution from any potential wrongdoings; in its stead, I can only offer to share my current thought process on this topic. I’d still encourage you to seek other perspectives, and many people have written or spoken on this topic.
I believe we must first acknowledge that, on the terrain of the internet, discussions regarding cultural appropriation have reached a certain... extreme where some people view all forms of cultural exchanges as inherently suspect. They purport that so long as you stay within the bounds of ‘your’ culture, you will problematic behaviours. That perspective is inherent flawed. That is, it relies on a vision of culture as ‘bounded entities’ that exist in themselves. In reality, the ‘stuff’ that makes culture is emergent, existing only relationally, dialectically--it is a not a ‘thing’ that moves through time but an idea which is constantly negotiated and reproduced in relation to power and changing material realities to remain relevant and intelligible. The boundaries of cultural and ethnic groups are fuzzy, overlapping, and constantly being reworked and made meaningful. As an illustration, many of the food I grew up eating was influenced by ingredients and recipes immigrants brought in the 19th and 20th centuries, yet these dishes were understood as 'typically ours’. And it needs to be acknowledged that most of what is currently considered ‘white people food’ relies on ingredients that were introduced to our diet through colonialism and the violent dispossession of indigenous peoples (and, often, the current day exploitation of workers in the South and of migrant workers). No food can be truly ‘traditionally ours’, whatever the purported ‘we’ ends up being brought into the equation, and no eating behaviours can avoid the historical legacy and continuity of violence and power.
Of course, as people who exist in the world, we know that there are cultural differences. Bakhtin’s insights on language through the tensions between centripedal (ie towards uniformity, a common meaning) and centrifugal (toward diversity and change) forces can be expanded to help us conceptualise how we make sense of the way a ‘culture’ is perpetuated through time as something meaningful in our daily lives. Uniformity allows intelligibility, sense-making, but diversity and change are inescapable by-products of individuals and groups repeatedly going through life, meeting and trying to create intelligibility and sense together in a world that cannot stay the same. It is at the intersection of these two conflicting forces that something can be different yet considered the same--that we can create continuity out of change. But something perhaps less emphasized in Bakhtin’s discussions is how much power and material realities work on these forces. Power influences both centripedal and centrifugal forces, if only in orchestrating circumstances that shape how one encounters ‘different cultures’ or reproduces their 'own' culture.
We live at a moment where the world seems to have reached an apex of connectivity--where goods, people, ideas (and viruses) move across distance and borders at speeds that defy comprehension. Yet the way goods, people and ideas move (through which canals and systems? in which direction? to the benefits of whom? at the expense of whom? to what reception or use? in the service of which institutions and ideologies?) or are, inversely, incapable or unwilling to move, is influenced by power and material realities. It is inescapable.
In a roundabout way, what I’m trying to say is that it's useless to try to live life in 'your lane' by turning to a baseline 'culture' because we simply do not have a baseline culture to return to that is 'safe' from the influences of other cultures or the taint of the historical legacy and continuity of violence. So how do I personally reconcile that with how I engage with content that is produced from different cultural contexts, and how I engage with cooking food that is influenced by different cultural contexts? For me the guidelines I take into consideration are respect, attribution and avoiding forms of dehumanisation. These emerged out of witnessing how other white people have acted as well as critically reflecting on how I have acted in the past, and trying to do better (including of course, by listening to different perspectives on the topic). [just in case, warning for examples of racism/micro-agressions] I've been in China with white people who would praise the cooking we were eating in the same breath they were making jokes about dog meat. I've witnessed in Japan a dude decide not to come to an izakaya with Japanese colleagues, fucking off on his own to Akihabara instead, because he was disappointed he couldn’t talk about anime with them--too obsessed with the idealised version of Japan he’d created in his head to treat the Japanese people he met as people. The internet is full of white people telling you how to cook food from places they've never been and taking credit for 'popularising' that dish or 'making it better'. That's not even talking about the tendency for food to become a mark of a cosmopolitan, metropolitan identity in the West--the open-minded, the liberal, the traveler, the hip white person up with the times and beyond the mainstream. Hell, I've even seen people who act as if eating ‘ethnic’ food prepared by immigrants is the singular proof that they were people who cared about immigrants' well-being.
Food is rarely just about food, even when consumed at home. At the same time, we’d be remiss in all these discussions of power to dismiss how food is also one of oldest things we, as humans, want to share with others--including strangers. Feeding is nourishing and giving, eating is accepting into ourselves something made by others. Most people appreciate it when the value of a dish that holds importance for them is recognised by others--although, of course, many might understandably also resent that they have been discriminated against or mocked for eating that same food. Every time I’ve been invited in an immigrant household or at events with mostly immigrants, I’ve felt this sense of almost trepidation emanating from them, waiting for my reaction, and satisfaction once I was seen eating and appreciating the food they had served me--as if the acceptance of the food that was tied to their identity was a form of acceptance of who they were. Of course this can’t be disentangled from past experiences where other people might have been disrespectful, dismissive or outright racist: but the excitement they had in sharing food that had meaning to them and seeing others appreciate it was genuine.
Beyond situations of clear cultural sharing, where we get closer to what appears to be ‘cultural appropriation’, I believe that we cannot act as if there is something inherently sacrilegious in the idea of adapting recipes or using a specific ingredients in new ways--that’s centrifugal forces at play, and they have provided us with many dishes we love today: from immigrant creations like butter chicken to things like spicy kimchi. We cannot work with the assumption that people will only react with hostility at the idea of other people cooking the food they grew with, even in ways that are different from how they’re traditionally used and are thus “not authentic”. I still remember an interaction I had in a Korean grocery store, once upon a time when I lived in a metropolitan city. A man in front of me at the cash register who had been buying snacks and chatting with the employee in Korean looked at my stuff and suddenly asked me if I knew the name of the leafy green I was buying. I wasn’t necessarily surprised because I had overheard in the past customers and employees commenting in Korean about being surprised about the ingredients I, a white person, was purchasing, thinking I couldn’t understand them. I confirmed to him that I knew I was buying mustard greens. He then asked me what I was planning to do with them, and I explained that while I didn’t think it’s a traditional or common way of using it, I personally liked to add them to kimchi jjigae because it compliments their bitter/strong taste and I like leafy greens in my soups and stews. He said it was interesting, and that he was kind of impressed. The employee chimed to tell me I should be honoured at the compliment because the man was actually a chef who owned famous Korean fusion restaurants in the city. That was clearly someone who took Korean food very seriously and clearly had a certain degree of suspicion regarding how white people interacted with it, but he was also curious and interested in seeing how I approached ingredients without having grown up eating them.
Another point of contention is also that we cannot ignore that food is a sensual experience and that, while tastes are greatly influenced by our environment, they are not solely so. I grew up hating most of the food my parents would serve me, and started cooking in my early teens to avoid having to eat it. Before I started cooking, I would often just eat rice with (in hindsight horrible) western-brand soy sauce instead of the meal my mom had made. When I ate Indian food for the first time during a trip at the ripe age of 16, it blew my mind that food could taste like this. Of course I never wanted to look back, and with each years I discovered that a lot of Asian cuisines fit my palate better than what I grew up eating or other cuisines I had tried. When I was a teenager we visited my mom’s friend in France and I hated what she served us so much I’d simply choose to nibble on bread, prompting her to try to stage an intervention for my ‘obvious’ anorexia. Yet, being in China made me realise ingredients I thought I hated had just been cooked in ways I disliked. Do my taste buds absolve me from any need to think critically about how I interact with food? Of course not. But sometimes the reason we want to cook certain recipes and foods is just that it tastes great to us, and we want to reproduce the recipes we enjoyed with the ingredients and the skills we have. Or, really, sometimes we just want to try new tastes because we do a lot of eating throughout our lives, and it seems a waste to limit ourselves to a narrow number of dishes for decades to come.
So that’s where I currently am in my thinking about this topic, as a white person who cooks dishes influenced by a number of different places but who is also not trying to cook in a way that is necessarily authentic. Some things that I keep in mind that you can ask yourself now that cdramas and cnovels have made you interested in Chinese cooking is: are you taking this as an opportunity to support immigrant businesses when getting your ingredients? are you supporting white creators when looking for chinese recipes (some suggestion of youtube channels: Made with Lau, Chinese cooking Demystified, Family in Northwest China, 西北小强 Xibeixiaoqiang, 小高姐的 Magic Ingredients)? are you being respectful (not reproducing harmful stereotypes in how you talk about chinese food and the people who eat it)? do you use your interest in Chinese food to create a narrative about China and Chinese people that denies them, in some way, of their complexity and humanity? are you using your interest in Chinese food to create a narrative about yourself?
In conclusion I will leave you with a picture of some misshapen baozi I’ve made.
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fangqueen · 3 years
Note
#3 What is that one scene that you’ve always wanted to write but can’t be arsed to write all of the set-up and context it would need? (consider this permission to write it and/or share it anyway)
Fun Meta Asks for Writers
Adding the link to the ask game at the start this time, 'cause this is gonna be a long one, y'all. 😂
Where do I even begin? First of all, @angie-leena​, thank you so SO much for sending me this ask! It was the kick in the ass I needed to get me to actually write this scene, and for that I’m extremely grateful. I still don’t know if I’m entirely happy with the finished product, but it exists now, and that’s something.
So some of you may remember (if anyone actually follows my ramblings, haha!) that I’ve been simultaneously complaining about and obsessing over this gigantic WIP I’ve had since fucking March 2019. Nearly two and a half years have passed since I put the first word to paper, and oh how I’ve loved to cry out in frustration about how I have about 12k written on the stupid thing and yet not a single scene finished.
AT LEAST
NOT UNTIL TODAY
YES, I’VE DONE IT. I’ve finished a scene on this amazing, wonderful, and incredibly stupid WIP, and I could just cry.
FYI for anyone who doesn’t know what the fuck I’m talking about (which I’m sure is everyone, ‘cause I don’t expect anybody to remember this insane thing I’ve been shouting about all this time, LOL): this is the Slytherin My Gryffindor WIP. Yes, that is a working title. 😅 I will find a better one.....some day.......Ron/Draco is the main pair, but there will also be plenty of others sprinkled in the background.
Anyway, about this ask and that context I haven’t been arsed to write yet...
Context required in order to understand this scene 😂:
Fred Lives AU
The Muggle world and the Wixen world has kind of mixed in recent years, and it’s very common for magical people to be using Muggle technology
The Weasley twins have opened a second shop in Diagon Alley...selling sex toys (yes, really)
Their first original product line issssssss..........dildoes shaped like the Weasley brothers’ own dicks (and a fleshlight kind of thing for Ginny)
Yes this is crack!fic (but, like, also not???)
Ron has been made general manager of the shop and is there all the time, as they’re incredibly busy
Draco wants 👏 that 👏 D 👏, but is worried about Ron finding out, so keeps coming into the shop randomly hoping he won’t be there (and of course he always is)
Eventually there’s a day where Ron’s in the backroom, Charlie’s visiting and helping out at the register, and when Ron emerges, Charlie informs him that Draco Malfoy has just run in and bought Ron’s dildo
Cue Ron being incredibly turned on by this notion
So that pretty much brings us up-to-speed for this scene - it’s been a few days now, and Ron’s been trying to figure out a way to contact Draco to talk to him about the whole thing, since they never became friends or anything after the war and don’t regularly talk unless they’re just seeing each other around
The fic is meant to touch on, like...fame in the aftermath of the war (i.e. why anyone would be interested in sex toys modelled after the Weasley siblings in the first place)
Ron has evolved from his teenage self and grown to hate the fame - it prevents him from being able to date, because the press can never let him keep anything private
After this scene, the fic will focus on Ron and Draco developing a sexual - and eventually romantic - relationship (originally under the guise of “testing out” other products from the shop together)
They will try their best to keep their relationship a secret, but, like...everyone knows 😘😘😘
Also Draco is a model in this one (not important for this scene, but just thought you might want to know 😂)
In addition, some warnings/content to make note of before reading:
NC-17 (smut incoming!)
Technology circa 2005
Phone sex
Semi-public sex
Sex toys
Both Ron and Draco are a little drunk (but very consenting!)
Crack taken way too seriously
Of course, this hasn't been betaed or Britpicked, so I apologize for how very rough it is right now, lol. It will likely be a little (or a lot!) different if I ever actually finish this whole fucking fic and post it later on. I am treating this scene like a “sneak peek” of the fic, because I definitely do still want to try to finish it someday...
HOLY SHIT, I had a LOT more to say about it than I thought. 😅 So anyway. Scene under the cut.
Friday night at the Dragon's Head was packed. It took a bit of initiative, but Ron, Seamus, and Dean finally managed to snag them all a table in the back corner, hoarding the extra seats till Harry and Neville finally arrived, trailed closely by Ginny and Parkinson ― who were curiously short one blond wizard.
Ron tried not to think about it. He bought the first round with Harry, listening to him chat about the recent Puddlemere match against the Magpies. They ordered nibbles for the table. Ron munched on chips, his heart skipping every time the door opened across the room and another few patrons trickled in.
He was on his third pint of the evening when he started getting antsy. He sipped his Simison, using the light smoke curling around the rim of the glass to discreetly glance around the pub, hoping to spot a familiar head of blond hair in the crowd. His foot tapped impatiently on the floor.
"Is he coming, then?"
Ron's head snapped to attention. Ginny checked the door as well before turning back to Parkinson.
"Who?" Neville asked, snagging a vinegar-soaked chip from the bowl in the center of the table.
"Malfoy," Ginny said, craning her neck to see her girlfriend's screen.
Parkinson tapped away on her mobile, shaking her head. "No. Says he's already curled up with a bottle of wine and a good book, and doesn't fancy getting all done up."
Fucking hell. Ron drained the dregs at the bottom of his glass. It wasn't often Malfoy joined them on a mostly-Gryffindor outing ― not unless Parkinson could convince him. Somehow, Ron felt he should've known it wouldn't be in the cards tonight. Conversation pivoted again, and Ron ran his fingers up the sides of his empty pint, thinking.
At some point, Seamus and Harry set off to get another round, and Ginny hurried away with them after a quick peck to Parkinson's cheek. Neville and Dean had gotten into a chat about proper Mimbulus mimbletonia care, and Ron saw his chance. He could feel his heart start to thud in his chest as he cleared his throat, raising his voice to catch her attention.
"Parkinson?"
She turned back from watching Ginny leave, a small smile tugging at the corners of her mouth. "Yes?"
"Think you could give me Malfoy's number?"
The smirk she gave him in response made his hands shake a little as they drummed against the tabletop.
"Whatever for?"
Ron stared her down, knowing full well any excuse he told her would never be enough. Parkinson's expression was predatory ― as if she already knew the answer anyway. He waited for her to comment, bracing himself.
To his surprise, she instead dug her mobile back out of her handbag.
She turned the screen towards him, and he typed the number directly into the dialer on his phone. He waited a few minutes until everyone ― Parkinson included ― had moved on to other things and forgotten about him, and then slipped from the table.
Ron shouldered his way through the crowd to the loo, pushing inside and locking the door behind him. It was a small room, hardly bigger than a broom closet. There was a toilet and a sink, a grimy mirror hanging above it, and a dim ceiling lamp that barely lit the space.
Ron backed up to one side of the room and slumped against the wall. He gripped the phone in clammy hands. Those pints had picked a perfect moment to hit him all at once. Ron blinked away the creeping dizziness, staring down at the numbers glowing dauntingly on the tiny screen. He'd been unable to get it out of his mind for days ― the image of Malfoy riding his dildo ― and now that he had a way to contact him, he was frozen. The leaky faucet dripped, the sound maddening as it mingled with the rush of blood in his ears. This was stupid. This was so bloody stupid.
He hit call.
Ron held his breath, cupping the phone to his ear. The line rang and rang, until he started to realize he didn't have a plan B. What if Malfoy didn't answer? What if he had to leave a voicemail? What would he even say? He should've just texted him, damn it.
Then, suddenly, the ringing stopped. There was rustling and a mumbled, "Bloody useless thing." Then, louder, "Yes?"
"Malfoy?"
"Yes, this is ― Weasley?"
Malfoy sounded surprised. Ron breathed out gradually, his heartbeat slowing with it. Malfoy's voice was clear and present on the other end. No looking back. He tried to think of something to say, and only came up with one thing.
"Haven't seen you round the shop yet this week."
"Don't tell me that's really why you called." Malfoy sighed, trying to sound put-upon, but Ron could hear the hint of nerves underneath. "If you must know, that would be because I found what I'd been looking for."
"I know."
There was a sharp intake of breath on the other end. For a moment, Ron thought Malfoy might hang up. But then he cursed quietly. "Damn that brother of yours. Incorrigible."
So it really was true. Charlie hadn't just been taking the piss. Ron felt a warmth flare up in his belly, spreading down to the tops of his thighs.
"Try growing up with him. And the twins? Now that's a real nightmare."
"I was trying for discreet, but you were always there."
Ron leaned further back against the wall, staring up at the dark ceiling above. He thought of all those times Malfoy had dropped in at the shop, only to hurry out again if Ron ever came too close. Malfoy had jumped at the chance when Ron had been called away to the back that day.
Malfoy cleared his throat. "Well. You know. So what, then? Looking to mock me for it?"
"You always assume the worst with me. Why is that?" Although Ron couldn't exactly blame him. He hadn't given Malfoy much else to go on in years past. Neither of them had. "No. No, I was calling because…" Why had he been calling? It had seemed such a natural thing when he'd asked Parkinson for Malfoy's number not five minutes ago. "I was curious. If there was, er." He waved his free hand, searching for the words. Nothing sounded right. "Any particular reason for it."
Malfoy laughed ― a short bark of a sound. "I mean, obviously yes. It's a sex toy, Weasley."
Ron snorted, taken aback. "That's not ―"
"Actually, I thought it'd make a nice statement in the middle of my dining table. It would be an excellent conversation piece for dinner parties."
"For fuck's sake, Malfoy, I didn't ―"
A chuckle rumbled through from the other end of the line. There was that snark again. Merlin, it made Ron hot, his skin blooming from his collar up to his ears. He chewed his lip, pulling back the grin that threatened to spread across his face.
"I only meant ― was there a reason? That you'd picked mine?"
The line suddenly went quiet. Ron had to check his phone just to make sure the call hadn't dropped.
When Malfoy finally replied, his voice was soft, uncertain. "What would possess you to call and ask me that?"
Ron breathed in slowly, his hand tapping an incoherent rhythm on his thigh. "Well, I'm a bit pissed, to be honest," he admitted, still feeling the slight burn the Simison had left in his throat.
Malfoy didn't say anything more at first. The lamp above buzzed as the faucet continued to drip. Ron could hear the noise from the pub pressing up against the other side of the door.
Then, Malfoy said, "Maybe there was."
Ron felt his heart jump into his throat. "Was what?"
"A reason why I bought it," Malfoy said slowly, deliberately. "Figure it out, Weasel."
Oh, bloody hell. Ron took a shaky breath. Every nerve felt like it was on fire.
"And...how was it?" Ron heard himself ask as if from very far away.
Even over the din of the music beyond the bathroom door, he could hear Malfoy swallow. "It was good."
"Oh, ta." Ron chuckled despite himself.
"No, I mean...Bugger." It was nice hearing Malfoy so flustered. A rare occurrence, and one that the little fluttering pixie in Ron's stomach very much wanted to repeat. "It was brilliant, alright? Happy?"
Brilliant. The word tingled down Ron's spine. For some reason, he couldn't wipe the smile from his face. Bloody hell, was this really happening? He thought of fleeting insults thrown in the school corridors all those years ago ― then he thought of a night just a few months ago, the look in Malfoy's eyes as Ron told him about the shop.
"You wrote a song about me once, if I remember correctly," Ron said, feeling deliriously happy.
"I suppose I did." Malfoy sighed.
Ron's eyes flicked to the door, to the noise of the crowd beyond. "Why didn't you want me to know?"
"Oh, please, Weasley," Malfoy said bitterly. "Pick a reason."
"I know, but ―" Ron tried to argue, but Malfoy cut him off.
"You don't owe me anything. It would be incredibly unfair for me to expect you to be interested in return."
Ron supposed that was fair enough. He'd had similar feelings towards Malfoy until very recently.
"I would be, though. I mean ― I am."
Saying the words out loud gave them a weight Ron hadn't felt before. He let them roll off his tongue, flattened the tip of it along his lips as he thought about flashes of icy blond hair, high cheekbones, and long fingers swirling around the rim of a glass. He thought of the moment he'd finally realized Malfoy had been looking back.
"Oh." Malfoy paused, seeming surprised by that revelation. "Good to know."
Malfoy fidgeted. Ron listened intently, hearing the breath he released and the scrape of his fingers against his mobile.
"You wouldn't ― ah." Malfoy caught himself, and Ron waited for him to continue, his ears ringing. "Would you want to…?" Malfoy trailed off, finishing his thought with a scoff.
"Would I want to what ― oh."
Oh.
Ron swallowed hard. He wanted to believe Malfoy was asking him what he thought he was asking him, but even after everything, it was almost too good to be true. The long stretch of awkward silence on the other end told him he was right, though, and that made him jittery, his hand coming up to rub at the back of his neck.
"I could be reading too much into this," Malfoy muttered.
"No, no, definitely not. I mean." Ron licked his lips, his mouth suddenly feeling far too dry. "I just don't want you to think I expect this."
Malfoy made a sound, and Ron could practically feel him rolling his eyes on the other end of the line.
"Oh, so you don't ring up every person who buys a model of your cock and ask them how they enjoyed it?"
"What? No, of course not!" Ron stopped, realizing, and laughed at himself. "You're joking. That was a joke."
"Terribly clever, this one."
A sudden jiggling of the door handle made Ron jump, almost dropping his mobile in the process.
"Occupied!"
He fumbled with the phone, his heart thudding wildly. When he put it back to his ear, Malfoy was laughing. The sound made Ron feel weak in the knees.
"Where are you?" Malfoy asked, still snickering.
"In the loo at the Dragon's Head."
"Oh, of course." Malfoy sucked his teeth contemplatively. "Hang on. Is there anyone in there with you?"
Another frustrated turn of the door handle.
"It's a single."
"Good." Malfoy lowered his voice conspiratorially. "Do you want me to use it?"
Ron pressed his hand flat against the door, waiting until he heard the bloke give a huff and storm off. "Use what?"
"Your dildo, Weasley."
The silken drawl of Malfoy's voice spread like gooseflesh across Ron's skin. "Right now?" he asked incredulously, although he was already half hard at the thought.
"I could give you an exclusive product review. Unless you don't want to."
"No, I do!" Ron replied quickly, and Malfoy laughed again, making him blush.
"Eager, are we?"
"Yes." Ron passed a hand over his face, trying to laugh as well, but it came out shaky. Merlin, it had been all he could think about for the past few days. Still, he'd never imagined Malfoy would offer it outright. "Just didn't take you for the phone sex type."
Malfoy hummed. "You caught me in a randy mood. Now how do I ― ah, right."
Ron assumed he'd been put on speakerphone, as there was now an echo. He dug out his wand for a moment and cast a quick Silencio on the bathroom. It was a wonder how he had the brain power to spare, when all the blood in his body was suddenly rushing to his cock. He could hear Malfoy fumbling for something on the other end.
"Where are you?" Ron asked in return, trying to distract himself from the heady thrum of anticipation.
"In bed. Naked," Malfoy added with a hint of a smirk in his voice. Ron groaned, shutting his eyes against the image of Malfoy stretched out on soft sheets, hard and waiting for him. Merlin, had he been naked the whole time they were talking? Ron pressed the heel of his palm to the crotch of his jeans.
Malfoy went silent for a moment, until there was a faint intake of breath. His bed creaked distantly in the background.
Ron licked his lips, cupping his hand around the solid, hot line of his cock under his trousers. "Are you prepping yourself?"
"Of course." Malfoy breathed out steadily, the bed creaking again. "You're bigger than I thought you'd be. Although I'd always wondered."
Fucking hell. Ron arched against his hand. Was he really going to get his cock out in a pub toilet? The last shred of his resolve melted away when he heard Malfoy moan, low and guttural, a sound that shot straight through Ron, all the way to his toes. He imagined Malfoy laying back, his knees bent up, and slick fingers down between his legs, pressing in and out of his puckered hole. Ron was switching the phone to his left hand before he could give it a second thought. He flicked open the button on his jeans and pushed his pants down to hook under his balls, taking himself in hand.
Ron rolled his hand down over his length. Malfoy's breath hitched, and he cursed, the bed shifting with him. Ron caught his lip between his teeth, wondering how many fingers he had in him. He imagined himself leaning over Malfoy on the bed, licking a hot stripe along his neck as his hand worked him open, his thighs falling open as he settled between them.
"Fuck, I needed this," Malfoy breathed. Ron moaned, pulling his foreskin back and rubbing over the weeping head of his cock.
Malfoy muttered a Cleansing charm, and then a drawer was pulled roughly open nearby. Ron heard Malfoy pick up the phone, moving and setting it down again as he bounced on the bed, adjusting himself.
"Are you ―?" Ron wanted to ask, but he couldn't finish the thought, left hand gripping the phone hard as he tried to steady himself.
"Yes, gods."
Ron paused, listening as Malfoy shifted and panted on the other end. He didn't have to ask when it was fully in. He knew the moment Malfoy's breath faltered, the gasp he gave sending shivers down Ron's spine.
Malfoy huffed, the sound so loud to Ron's ears as the whole world funneled down to a point, to this moment as he listened to Malfoy move the toy inside of himself. He moaned, and Ron thought he could hear the squelch of lube on the other end of the line as it entered him.
"Talk to me, Weasley."
Malfoy sounded wrecked. It was enough to make Ron's toes curl just to hear it. It was almost too much to handle ― the idea of Draco Malfoy being thoroughly fucked out by a dildo modelled after Ron's own cock. Ron's head thunked back against the wall. His hand trembled a little as he began stroking himself again.
"Get on your knees for me," he said softly.
Malfoy swore. Ron heard him flip over, his panting breaths suddenly closer to the receiver. In his mind, he could see Malfoy bent over the bed, arse in the air and cheek pressed against the mattress, lips rosy and parted. He imagined himself knelt behind Malfoy, hands gripping his slender hips.
"There's, uh." Ron swallowed. "There's a self-shagging feature. If you want. The spell's ―"
"Oh, we're well acquainted."
"Fuck," Ron moaned. No way he was going to last like this. He rocked his hips, thrusting into the tight circle of his fist. Malfoy sounded like he was trying to collect himself, even as his voice broke on the last word. Ron couldn't begin to explain why that aroused him so much, but he didn't care, already speeding up his hand as it flew over his cock.
Malfoy cast the spell, and Ron felt his cry as the toy began to move on its own. The bed gave a jolt under Malfoy's weight. He gasped again, and Ron heard his fingers scrambling across the sheets.
Ron could almost see it. He imagined Malfoy's bowed back, his knees slipping and spreading apart, his toes curling. The bed creaked with each movement. A dildo of Ron's own making, Malfoy arching back onto it as it fucked him down onto the mattress. Merlin, he should've known Malfoy would take it so well, his eyes rolling back as he listened to the sounds Malfoy made as it thrust into him.
Ron closed his eyes and felt like he was sitting in the room, watching the whole show, watching a copy of his cock pound into Malfoy again and again. The pub outside the bathroom door fell away from him, and all he could focus on was Malfoy's voice and his hand on his own cock.
"Tell me how it feels," Ron choked out, wanting to hear it, see it, touch it, to watch Malfoy unravel under Ron's hands and cock, to capture each cry with his tongue.
Malfoy groaned. "So ― good ―"
"Tell me," Ron rasped again, thrusting his hips forward into his hand. "Tell me ― ah ― how good it is."
"It's so ―" Malfoy cried out, his hands skittering over the sheets. "So good ― so big ― I ―"
"Fucking hell, Malfoy."
At that point, Ron didn't know if he wanted to be watching the toy fuck Malfoy or if he wanted to take over for it. Was he really getting jealous of a dildo? He wished he was there. He wanted to tell Malfoy as much, but he couldn't manage it, instead moaning loudly as he felt his balls begin to draw up against him.
"Fuck, Weasley, you're gonna make me come," Malfoy whined, his posh accent slipping. 
Holy shit, and that was what did it. Ron made a gut-punched sound, his wrist flicking over the head of his cock. He was coming almost before he'd even realized. He barely had the presence of mind to do anything about it before the first spurt had dribbled onto the floor. He pushed off the wall and lent forward, pumping the remainder into the sink. He heard Malfoy swear, and Ron slumped back against the wall again, listening as he came apart with a shuddering cry.
The line went quiet once more. Ron rested his head on the tiles behind him, closing his eyes, holding his softening cock. For a long time, all he could hear was Malfoy breathing on the other end, his own heartbeat equally loud in his ears.
"I liked that. A lot."
Eloquent as always. Ron half expected for Malfoy to say just that, but instead he heard a very soft chuckle ― and then, quietly, "So did I."
Now that his heart rate was gradually slowing, the noise of the club outside wormed its way back in, reminding Ron of where he was, and what he'd just done. He shuffled his feet uncomfortably, glancing at the door when he heard a chatty couple pass by. How long had he been in there? Were the others looking for him?
Another person suddenly banged on the door, and Ron started, pushing off from the wall and quickly withdrawing his wand, disabling his Silencio and spelling himself clean.
"Right." He wanted to say more. Merlin, he did. But instead all he said just then was, "Well, I should probably, er, get back to it. You know?"
"Of course." There was rustling on the line, and then Ron was off speakerphone, Malfoy's voice close and intimate again in a way that made him shiver. "Have a good night, Weasley."
"You too, Malfoy."
Ron exited the bathroom, ignoring the irritated look the other patron gave him as he slipped past.
The entire way back to their table, he felt like he was floating on a cloud. Harry gave him an odd look when he slid into his seat, pulling the fresh pint they'd bought him an indeterminable amount of time ago towards him. Ron couldn't even begin to catch up with what they were all talking about, his mind drifting to thoughts of Malfoy, his mobile a leaden weight in his pocket as the night wound on.
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NSFW Alphabet with Fujin.
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Oh god, we are back on the NSFW Alphabet bullshit. No one requested this, and I was meant to be writing Bi-Hans, but like, Fujin happened. NetherRealm really are redeeming themselves with this design. Short haired Fujin has ruined me. So here you go, 7 pages of poorly written smut. Most of which was written after a bottle of wine. Enjoy! Warnings: Smut, believe it or not, shocking I know. 18+ under the cut. Mentions of kinks, smut, oral sex and all that good stuff.  GIF doesn’t belong to me. 
• A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex) Fujin is so soft and caring after. To reiterate the point, you’ve fucked a god, you’re going to be exhausted and a little sore. He knows this. And almost feels a little guilty deep down, but when you reassure him everything’s fine and you just need some TLC he cheers back up. He’ll bring you whatever you desire. You want a bath? He’ asking what essential oils you want. You want a drink? Warm or cold is his question? Also, slight inappropriate use of his power but Elder Gods be damned, if you’re too warm, he may just magically summon a bit of a breeze to cool you down. He wants you to be comfortable and content. So that’s his end goal. • B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s) He like Raiden has elected to choose this form, but he unlike his brother, does have a preference for what he prefers. He loves his hair (He knows this isn’t really a body part but still) it’s a huge erogenous zone for him. He loves the soft caresses but also doesn’t mind the occasional tug. He also loves his arms. They are very, very defined, and extremely strong. He’s not entirely sure why you fawn over them, but who the hell is he to argue? Loves it when you run your hands up and down them. Trace those glowing tattoos and get him all riled up. Loves it. He’s built and there is no denying it. Run those hands up and down his taut muscles and await for sinful noises. If he had to choose one part of you, he would struggle. He thinks every part of you is amazing and would genuinely struggle. He’s not sure how to answer when you ask him ‘Chest, Ass or thighs?’ He’s really not sure. Kind of stares, has to ask Kung Lao for clarification. Raiden would be clueless and would have to consult the Elder Gods for an answer. And who said Big Brothers knew everything? When he finds out you’re referring to your body, he doesn’t blush, more just an affirming ‘Ohh’ before him letting you know his preference very casually, more than likely in an inappropriate situation. Queue him letting you know that he prefers your thighs and ass whilst you’re sparring. He will also run his hands up the back of your thighs when you’ve got him pinned, only for him to playfully, and as discreetly as possible, squeeze your ass, before pinning you back. • C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically) He’s far more open to experimentation than you would have first thought, but it comes with time (No pun intended there… maybe just a little one) At first, he’ll insist on cumming in you, it’s his preference. It’s just an all-round good way to finish, he loves been inside you and it spares mess. As his confidence grows, if you were to ask him to cum on your thighs, pull out and cum on your stomach, he would definitely indulge you. He’s very curious about Earthrealm customs, and that applies to ‘Mortal sexual customs and courtships’ as he puts it. Very sexy. He’s not overly bothered by cumming in you or on you, he’s sort of neutral to it in a sense and very laidback. If you want him to cum on your chest he will do. But he does like cumming in your mouth. The first time you sucked him off, his hand was knotted deep in your hair, you were on your knees whilst he was stood, hands gripping the back of his taut thighs like your life depended on it. You’re sure you left nail marks but that’s beside the point. When he warned you he was about to cum, you carried on and made a point to keep eye contact locked as you swallowed it all. He was shocked a little bit and you swore you saw a blush spread across his cheeks. A very faded one but you saw it, you’re sure of it. He’s open with how much he likes it, but he’s still very laidback about it all. As long as you’re both having fun and pleasured, then he doesn’t really care where he cares. • D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs) Dirty Secrets for The God of Wind? He has a few. Can Gods blush is another question? You swear they can, faintly and barely there, but you swear you’ve seen one creep of his face a few times. He’s far more open about his secrets and desires than his brother is. He won’t scream them from the top of Sky Temple, but he’s open with you about them. He’s so nonchalant about his desires and dirty secrets, which begs the question, if you know them, are they dirty secrets? You guess they are, because by god, if anyone in The White Lotus or his Brother found out, you’re sure they’d be a little shocked. Fucking you at The Sky Temple is definitely up there. It’s something he’s done before. Elder Gods be damned. He had to have a hand clamped round you mouth, the walls are paper thin, so you couldn’t make much noise. So, fucking in locations you really shouldn’t is up there. It’s the adrenaline and the way a blush would spread across your face. Slight adrenaline on his part, but he loves seeing you get worked up. Rough sex is on there too, but more on that later. • E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?) He’s got some experience under his belt. He’s an Eternal God who looks like he’s chiselled from Marble. He may be the younger of the two, but he’s still been around for a long time. That doesn’t mean he’s fucked a lot of people though. He’s got a bit of experience but not a lot to brag about. You’re his first Mortal though. So, he’s inexperienced on that front. He doesn’t want to break you or hurt you, so he’s very cautious with you at first. His sexual repertoire isn’t out there either, he knows the basics, but he wants to learn. And like I said, he’s in love with Earthrealm and wants to protect it something fierce. He also wants to learn everything about Mortals. He’s constantly remarking on how curious Mortals are with their sex acts. • F = Favourite position (this goes without saying) Has a penchant for wall sex, he’s not sure why he likes it so much. He understands it’s not overly comfortable for you, so he tends to get started with it. There’s just something about you both getting heated, him pressing you up against the wall, and showing off all that godly strength. It’s impressive, most people would cramp and couldn’t keep it going, but he, isn’t just any mere mortal, is he? He’s got the strength and stamina to fuck you so hard that you won’t be able to stand after. He’s still on the cautious side though. He adores and loves you, so he’s still very cautious. He does like you on top too. He loves the feel of your legs at either side of his, splayed over his thighs so deliciously, the feel of your hips against his, and your hands clawing at his shoulders for leverage to help you fuck him. It also gives you prime access to his hair. He doesn’t care if it’s short or long at the time, he wants your nails raking through his locks and tugging them. It really gets him going. You can also do that whilst he’s fucking you up against the wall, it may be why he has a preference for it so much. His sex positions were very limited when you first got together. But throughout the months and years, he’s found a new array of positions that he likes. Doggy is also on there. He is very vocal the first time you fuck in this particular position. Commenting in bated whispers about how he loves watching your ass back up against his cock, hungrily craving more, he also can grip your thighs and hips for leverage. As well as slapping your ass if he’s feeling adventurous. He  has prime view of your thighs trembling as you cum too. So, all in all, 11/10 position. Who knew a god could be so sinful? • G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.) He can be serious in the moment, and he can also be a little humorous. It’s all to do with the context. He’s more laidback and a little bit goofy in his personality. And that carries over into how he is during sex. If the moment calls for seriousness and is very intimate, then he will be less humorous. He’s very in the moment during these moments. He finds humour to be a good coping mechanism if he’s ever ensure. When you’re experimenting, or trying something for the first time, he will breathily chuckle or make a slick joke. Nothing vulgar or anything to turn you off, more comments that have a light speckling of jest to them. His voice is so light and airy, that anything sounds good in it too. So, all in all, it will depend on the context of why you’re fucking. Intimate he’s serious, quickie and first time trying something, expect a light dash of humour. He’s charming so it works, he always has the right amount and it’s never too much. • H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.) As laid back as he is, that does not translate into his grooming routine. He’s very neat and everything has to be neat. It’s trimmed and he’s very meticulous about his grooming routine. So, whilst that aspect doesn’t match his hair, you’re actually shocked to see that the carpet does match the drapes. He’s unsure why you’re staring at them, then back at his hair, then back down at his crotch. He kind of tilts his head, propping himself up on his elbows, and staring with you. You blush a lot when he catches you staring and asks you ‘Is something wrong?’ with a slight frown, worrying that he hasn’t been as precise and neat with everything. When you let him know, that most people you’ve been with, don’t have white fucking hair, he just chuckles. Relief is flooding over that intrigued and curious face of his. • I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect) Okay, so when it comes to intimacy, it once more will depend on context. He can very intimate, slow, passionate and romantic if the situation calls for it. It’s more reserved for special occasions, really reiterating that he cares for you and loves you. These occasions could be anniversaries for example. Or, if the moment just feels right. If it feels like one of those moments, in which you’re getting lost in each other’s touches, and every touch feels fuelled by the desire to be close to you. He will be more intimate and more romantic in the moment. He’s very intuitive of your needs and how the mood of the room is. Please don’t expect however, big romantic sexual gestures, such as rose petals on the bed etc. He doesn’t get them. Expect creative and tailored romantic sexual encounters. Extremely intimate shower sex has happened before. Sex with Fujin will always make you feel divine and loved though. He’ll always leave cool touches that seemingly set your body on fire with desire after. Touches that are laced with want, need and desire for you. And he’ll always give your body compliments that make you want to moan a bit too loudly. Lots of whispered words in your ear about how perfect you are too. • J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon) He may not have the time but he’s not one to ignore his desires. He knows he has a whole realm to protect. A realm that is always in trouble. But how the fuck is going to stop Quan-Chi or Shinnok if he’s distracted? Can’t fight The Lords of Evil with an erection. Okay, he didn’t say that or think that, but you get the gist. When you asked him if gods jerk it with a small smile on your face, laughing in your head about it, when he asks you what you mean by ‘Jerk it’ and you mention masturbation, he simply and very casually responded with he does. Because he can’t get distracted. You almost spit your drink out with how casual he is about everything sexual. He’s so unbothered about everything and so fucking casual it shocks you. He’s not constantly doing it, it’s more when the desire rises and the need, he’s going to take care of it. When he meets you, he finds himself doing it less and less. Your hands feel a million times better than his own do. • K = Kink (one or more of their kinks) Okay, so I’m going to be real with you guys, he’s not entirely sure what you mean when you ask him what his kinks are. You will have to explain this slightly odd Earthrealm custom to him. He’s not overly sure if any of the things he likes falls into kinks, but he soon realises that he has a few. He loves hair pulling, he loves to have his hair pulled and raked through more specifically. The noises he makes are unbelievable and they are something else. So, hair pulling is definitely one of them. He’s also a big old switch. He’s so laidback and chilled, he’s into you been more dominant and him been dominant. Whatever the mood calls for. He can be dominant when he wants to be, but he can also let you take control. He does prefer to be a little more on the dominant side. He will never let you know how much he gets turned on when you call him ‘A God’ or tease him about his status. But his cock will always betray him and will twitch and get that ever so slightly bit harder. It’s not that he thinks he has power over you, it’s more the way your lips twitch into a smile, and the way you either moan or whisper it. He’s not overly into biting or marking, but if you ask him or beg him to bite you and mark you up, he’s not going to deny you. He can leave marks that seemingly will last an eternity. He may also have a slight temperature kink. His power is one that can sort of be incorporated into your sex life with great care and ease. But he does love lowering the temperature of the room, watching your body react, as a cool breeze sweeps over your naked form. The way you writhe, bonus points if he’s got your arms pinned above your head. • L = Location (favorite places to do the do) He’s very adventurous when it comes to locations. He has to be extremely careful at Sky Temple, because ahaha you shouldn’t be there. A blind eye can be turned when you’re both chilling on the balcony, faking meditation, to escape a slight lecture. But nothing intimate is supposed to happen there. So, if you’re going to fuck at Sky Temple, it’s his room and you have to be very quiet. But when he’s at your apartment or house, anywhere is fair game. You’ve had sex in your bed, the shower, the couch, on top of your desk, against the wall, countertops, anywhere that strikes your fancy. You once even fucked him in the back of your car, it was dark, and you’d been at the beach and had been driving back. Adrenaline fuelled wouldn’t even cover it. He’s so curious and intrigued by Earthrealmers and their sexual appetites. He’s down to try any location, as long as it doesn’t land either of you two in too much trouble. He has little shame because Gods don’t really know much of shame. But he understands, it can be quiet embarrassing if anyone was to walk in and catch him literally balls deep in you. So as long as it’s secluded enough, and you won’t get caught it’s all chilled. • M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going) Oho what would motivate a god and turn them on? A fair few things you find out. As mentioned throughout this sinful, smut filled essay, he loves having his hair pulled, tugged or played with. It doesn’t matter if he’s got his long flowing hair, or his short hair, just please play with it. It really gets him going, it can make him go from soft and gentle, to, I need to raw you, very quickly. Soft, fluttery touches get him going too. Especially on his inner thighs or his arms. If you grip his arms and tease, with some strayed fingers that are tickling any bare skin on show, it’ll make him hitch a breath. You also taking control really gets him going. If you were to push him down on your couch, straddle him, and start teasing his neck with your tongue. He’s going to be read to go. His cock slowly hardening underneath you. Anything that involves you two close together, will get him going and turned on. He’s also into having you run your nails up and down his back too. Though this is a more ‘in sex’ kind of moment. He loves also seeing your body, so if you were to undress in front of him, he’d love every second of it. Savouring it because fuck knows when you’ll get the time again. Those glimmering silver eyes, devouring your body, making you feel absolutely divine and making you feel flushed and warm all over. Who knew the God of Wind could make you feel so heated? • N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs) He’s not big on degrading your or been degrading. It’s definitely on his no list and one of his turn off. Also, anything that can or will hurt you, he’s not asking anything. He knows he’s stronger than mortals, and he is very careful with you. Any wince and he’s going to be asking if you’re okay. He cares for you deeply and he would hate himself if anything happened to you. He’s also still a God and he’s a very happy-go-lucky one too, so anything that’s said with malice or hatred is going to turn him off. He isn’t into that. He also holds you with such respect, he isn’t going to say anything that he deems to be untrue or degrading. He isn’t doing that. He loves and cares for you. It’s not happening. He isn’t into sharing either. When having a slightly awkward conversation, about threesomes, after watching a TV show. He decides that’s not for him. So that’s no on the cards either. Also, anything that creates a lot of mess is a no go for him. Barring him cumming on your face, because, you know, you clean it up ever so well. And he does love watching you clean it up, enough, that he’s ready to go again. So there’s another motivation. He also doesn’t do power play or dynamics majorly. He doesn’t mind been dominant and taking control, but he will not have you on your hands and knees begging for him. He’s not vain nor prideful, so anything that involves anything above teasing and you breathlessly uttering the phrase ‘Please’ is going to turn him off. He knows he’s a God, and whilst he doesn’t mind the odd teasing phrase and utterance of it, he’s not going to ram home the fact he’s a God and demand anything because of that status. He respects you too much for that shit, you’re his equal and it’s not his style. • Oral = (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.) He hates saying that he prefers receiving. He just loves it. From the first time you wrapped that tongue around his cock, he became enthralled by the act, and it can make him lose control very easily of his volume control. That doesn’t mean he doesn’t give, because he does give and will always offer to reciprocate the act. He does love having your legs spread either side of his head, splayed especially for him, god he loves it. He just loves receiving and it’s his preference. He had no idea that oral sex existed, so he’s pretty thrilled by it. He makes some sinful noises when his cocks down your throat, hands knotted deep in your hair, trying to keep control, powerful legs taunt as he stands before you. You can make the God of Wind come undone with your mouth, that’s a pretty impressive fete, but certainly not one that you can put on your CV/resume. His skills giving aren’t great to start with, he literally discovered he could pleasure you with his mouth a few hours ago, you cannot expect him to have skills magically. He does gain the skills though, because he’s determined, focused and wanting to master it. So, you know, makes up for it with enthusiasm. That, and his hands feel so good against your thighs, running little teasing circles. • P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.) Fujin’s pace will depend entirely on the context and mood. He can do slow and sensual when the time calls for intimacy and romance. But he can also do fast and rough, when you’re both worked up and needy for each other. If he had to pick a preference, he prefers to start off with a teasingly slow pace, before picking the speed up and intensity. He can also start intensely before winding it down to intimate. He often lets you pick the pace and roughness, as he wants you to be comfortable. But like I’ve said earlier, it depends on context and who’s feeling more dominant. He loves both equally as well. He loves soft, slow and sensual sex, when he can worship your body, and you can caress his body. He loves the feeling and sense of been entwined together, your bodies and hearts beating as one. But then again, he loves fucking you hard and rough against a wall, whilst you struggle to keep your grip on your words and they soon become incomprehensible, as he literally fucks you silly. Your hands are knotted in either his hair or running down his back, his volume control is turning to mush as well. He loves sex with you, because you show him that it can go either way. Sex isn’t like masturbation, it’s not a chore and something to be taken care of. Sex can be about intimacy and it can also be about pleasure and desire. So, he’s easy going with pace, but he does prefer a mix of soft and sensual and roughness. • Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.) He’s very laid back when it comes to quickies. He does prefer to explore and take his time, but sometimes, the need arises for quickies. So, he’s down for them. He’d never really experienced quick sex before you, but upon discovering them he’s not initially keen, but they grow on him. Sometimes you just need a good hard fuck and he can appreciate that. He does prefer taking his time though, so you only really have quickies when the need arises. • R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.) For a God he sure does like taking some risks and does love to experiment. The experiment part comes from the desire to learn more about Earthrealm and his curious and inquisitive nature. As his confidence grows, so does his desire to experiment, he’s more worried about you, so he tends to restrain himself a little with experimenting till you reassure him you won’t break. As for risks, he’s into been risqué in terms of locations, but nothing that will endanger you. He’s down for that. He’s not into embarrassing you, so anything that may bring about shame or embarrassment he’s not about. He knows little shame, oh the folly of been a god, but he doesn’t want to upset you. So, risks with some locations yes and experimenting with positions yes. But nothing too dangerous. • S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?) Yeah, he’s a God, so he does have a lot of stamina to match that status. He can potentially last a really long time, and his recovery is ridiculously quick. He could have just finished in your mouth, watching as you lick off the escaped cum that’s escaped from your mouth, and his cock is already twitching and hardening again. How long he lasts however, depends entirely on how long you’ve been fucking and also how hard he’s going. To start with, he could last a fair bit, but your cunt always managed to make him cum far sooner than he anticipated. He does begin to last longer the more you fuck. But if you’re both fucking hard, and are both really turned on, he can cum quicker than normal. It all depends on the mood. And whilst he may  be able to go for multiple rounds, it all depends on how you’re feeling. He wants to make sure you’re comfortable and content, so if you want to go again, great hop on, if you don’t that’s fine you can cuddle. • T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?) Whilst he doesn’t own toys, big surprise there, and he has no idea about much of this stuff, he is intrigued upon finding one or two you own. He will outright ask you what it is. Not if people are around though. You hid them well, which means not everyone needs to know about them. He’s so open with you telling them about them and would honestly be open with using them. Some he’s not keen on but he wouldn’t mind using one or two on you. He’s not threatened by a lump of silicone and plastic. He’s made you orgasm multiple times with his hands, cock and tongue, he’s pretty sure with his skills, but not in a vain way, but he’s assured with his skills at making you come undone. Toys, to Fujin, are just something different and an odd Earthrealm custom that he wanted to indulge in and explore. Only to find he’s okay with occasionally busting them out. He knows you’re not going to run off with a dildo, so he’s really not envious of them. That, and he knows he can’t be around as much as he wants to be, so if you want to fuck that dildo and think it’s him when he’s away, you go ahead and do that. Very supportive in your pleasure. • U = Unfair (how much they like to tease) Fujin does like to tease a little bit. Not a lot that it turns into edge play or edging to the point you’re screaming out and begging for him to make you cum. He’s not into that. A breathless ‘Please...’ or things along that line are okay. He’s more into teasing with his hands, running little circles round your bare skin, gripping your thighs when no one is looking that sort of thing. It really does get him going. He will also tease slightly with the temperature. One minute, a cool breeze is washing over your naked skin, making you ache for him… only for the breeze disappear before it can ghost over your erogenous zones. That kind of teasing is okay, because he will give into you easy. He doesn’t mind you also teasing him with his God status. As long as it’s not powerplay like. That does make him a little uncomfortable. ‘Show me how a god fucks a mortal’ is okay, but ‘I need to pleasure your godly cock’ is a no go. So, a little bit of teasing goes a long way with him. • V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.) The noises this man makes are unbelievable. They make you ache for him and are just sinful. Who knew someone so holy, divine and godly could sound so sinful? He can be very loud with his moans. He tends to have to keep quiet if there’s a chance of you getting caught, which always kills him on the inside. He has fairly decent control of his volume, unless you’re deepthroating his cock, whilst moaning, sending vibrations up his shaft and into his spine. Making him tense and lose control. He loves hearing your noises too, it’s his goal to make you moan loud in his ear, a smirk playing on his lips as he hears it. Literal music to his ears. He will also whisper things in your ear, his voice is so light and breezy, everything sounds fucking so good in it. It literally does make you weak at the knees, from his way of speaking, to his loud moans that rip from this throat. Moans that make you worried you’ll get a noise complaint, not that you care at the time. • W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character) NSFW: He literally knows no shame and doesn’t always understand mortal shame. So, be prepared for inappropriate questions outside of the bedroom and the sanctity of your house. Queue him asking about a blowjob in the middle of the art gallery, after witnessing some erotic art. He can also kiss you with such intensity and be so blissfully unaware of what it does to you, that you’re left hot and flustered, after he catches your lips and playfully nips at your lip whilst you’re having a nighttime swim. He’s also so sinful for a god. So much so, you’re not sure people would believe you, not that you’d want to share your sinful secrets with everyone. SFW: He once got back early from a mission early. Only to have you mention that you were a little sad. Bippity boppity boo, the winds clapping, and you look up from your book, to see he’s stood on your balcony. Ready for a night in of just holding you and catching up. He secretly wants a slice of the quiet life. And would love to settle down with you. He loves you so much. He wishes he could spend the rest of eternity with you. He thinks you’re perfect for him and that you were destined to be together. He’s never been more devoted to finding a way you can be immortal, if you express a similar wish to spend eternity with. He keeps up hope of finding a way the extend your lifespan. But he knows deep in his heart, that he is glad to have spent and found you and shared a short amount of time with you; than to have never met you, and him to have spent his eternity without knowing you. No matter the pain it will cause him. Raiden would also be there to help him either extend your life, because you make his brother happy, and he is a supportive older brother. • X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes) It’s impressive and is larger than average. He’s got a big dick guys, I’m not going to skirt around this. It’s not overly large but it does stretch you. Probably pushing past the 7” mark. It’s actually pretty thick as well. He’s so blissfully unaware of how big his dick actually is and is almost unphased when you remark how big it is. Good job he’s an expert at foreplay. His cock is in proportion to his body and it just looks right on him. • Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?) It’s not overly high but it’s not low. It’s more in the middle. If you’re down for fucking, then he’s down for fucking. He’s also down if you both just want to do some mutual masturbation, or oral sex. Whatever you want. Sometimes though, he would just like to hold you and cherish the moment. He’s not all about the sex either. Your relationship is extremely important to him, sex is just a bonus. And as much as he loves learning about new things and experimenting, he does love just a chilled night in, where you’re wrapped up in each other’s arms. • Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards) He falls asleep after you. He loves falling asleep with you. After sex, you end up talking about anything and everything. Shit gets philosophical on a night. And you love listening to his stories about all the things that he’s lived with. He’s lived a long arse time too, so there’s a fuck ton of stories. The cool sheets entwined and covering your bodies, legs and limbs tangled. His hands manipulating a cool soothing breeze to cool you down. Your head on his chest, whilst you trace his tattoos as they glow in the dark of the room, his words lulling you to sleep. He’ll make sure you’re sleeping soundly before falling asleep, planting a soft kiss on your forehead, before whispering how you complete him. He’s a fucking giant softy.
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hmslusitania · 3 years
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I see we're going ape over buddie and Choices tonight so
Yknow in 2.07, when Shannon comes back and her and Eddie have their first scene together? The argument at the end, after Eddie says it wouldn't be a good idea for her to see Christopher bc she left them, she says she needed him, she needed a husband and a co-parent - and "I needed someone to have my back!"
To which EDDIE says, "I always had your back"
*insert Incredibles "coincidence? I think NOT" gif here*
(Also side note, I do like that the show doesn't try to sugarcoat what Shannon did being messed up, and that Eddie's own actions weren't really the right thing either[thinking about his conversation with Buck where he says he got to pretend he left for a noble cause even tho he was running], and that it was just a sticky situation that neither of them were equipped to handle in any way, and snowballed. I do kind of wish we could've gotten post-divorce Shannon and Eddie and Christopher interactions, figuring out how they fit together, if at all, bc I like those intricate and messy situations but I could see how that might get too close to retreading old ground re: Michael and Athena's divorce. But I do hate how ive seen the fandom like. Seem to oversimplify things with Shannon sometimes? And make her the ultimate villain, and Eddie Did Nothing Wrong, Ever)
Hi Anon!
The decision to have Buck and Eddie's first bonding moment end with "You can have my back any day" and "or, y'know, you could have mine" only to then six episodes later find out that at least a contributing factor to Eddie's marriage dissolving was that he "didn't have her back" is like. Such a galaxy brain chaos move for them to take, honestly. Like?? They could've had the phrasing be literally anything in 2x07 but instead they had it directly echo Buck and Eddie in 2x01. What was the reason? Why did they do this?
As for the rest of your ask:
(gosh this got long and, uh, opinionated. It is Not Pretty below the cut)
One of the things I really liked about Eddie Begins is that we did get to see him at the beginning of his journey in being Chris's dad because it gives us an opportunity to appreciate how amazingly he's grown as a father. Like, he didn't start out as a perfect dad and he was definitely kind of lost in the woods at the beginning there when it came to the whole "how do I parent" thing. And before Eddie Begins, we'd only ever seen the end result of the growth he's gone through, where he really is a fantastic dad whose son is basically his entire reason for being. Before Eddie Begins, we get to hear him say things like "I left first" and "I've failed that kid more times than I can count but I love him enough to never stop trying" but we kinda have to take that on faith? Because we hadn't actually seen him be anything besides a good dad until we saw his Begins episode. (And even then in his begins it's like "area man in his early 20s unsure how to care for small child while also coping with PTSD and a toxic support system" which like. yeah. no shit. there's one hell of a learning curve there)
The thing about Eddie and Shannon as a couple and as parents that always gets to me is that they were so fucking young. We don't know exactly how old Eddie is in the show, but we can guesstimate pretty safely that he's around the same age as Ryan which would make him between 23 and 24 when Chris was born, and it seems reasonable to believe Shannon was around the same age. It's also a pretty common reading in the fandom -- although I'm not sure how much canon support there is for it because we really, really don't know anything about their relationship pre-Christopher unless I'm forgetting something -- that they got married because Shannon got pregnant and that was the Done Thing. And when you're 23-24, baby on the way, freshly married, that is just like. So much. It sure as hell ruined my parents' relationship when they did that exact thing, and then they disliked each other until they were 27 and then they got divorced, and no one was happier than me about it, I have to tell you.
Back to the show, I can only give you my impressions, obviously, but the impression I have always gotten from the whole "I left too" conversation and the context that goes into it and the different behaviours we see exhibited by the characters is that Eddie "left" first and it comes across to me that he was basically an early twenty-something kid running scared from the abstract concept of being a father in general, and then when he was forced home by an honourable discharge, and was confronted with the reality of Christopher, he managed to step the fuck up and become Christopher's dad. It's there in 2x02, right? "Oh, you've got a kid? I love kids!" "I love this one." Eddie doesn't strike me as a Swiss Army Knife all-purpose Dad(tm) the way Bobby is. Eddie is Christopher's dad. (and like, of course, he's obviously moved by kids when he's on a call, we've seen that enough times to know that if there's a child who can even glancingly remind him of Christopher, Eddie's sense of self-preservation goes out the window, and I love that about him as heart-stopping as it can be in practice)
Shannon, on the other hand, didn't run from the idea of being a mother -- at first. When she left, it wasn't from the abstract. She left Chris (and "gave up" on Eddie, thanks Helena). She was not running from a concept, she was running from a reality. I think Shannon is a fascinating character to include in a television show as a side character, because she really isn't a one note character. Like, she was unarguably a bad mother, and from what we saw, she was a questionable romantic partner to have (but as you said, anon, Eddie was also not 100% the best romantic partner when he was with Shannon either; their entire relationship so far as I can tell was built on sexual chemistry which, uh, super does not sustain a relationship), but she also seems to have been a devoted daughter? I mean, yeah, it's entirely possible that her mom being sick was a convenient excuse to bail -- and obviously she didn't come back after her mom died, and didn't, y'know, contact her son or husband in the interim, so yes, I can see that being a valid way to read the situation. I don't think she's the Ultimate Evil, because she strikes me as a very human character in all the ways that people are more often than not really fucking flawed.
But then we get back to the actual break-up scene. The first time I watched it (and second, and third; then the fourth time the person I was watching with was like "I mean, sure, but it could also be read in this light") her "I'm just learning how to be someone's mother" speech really bothered me? Partly because it was the abstraction of it, right? Eddie doesn't like kids, he likes Christopher, and Shannon sort of had the inverse journey there, I guess, where it went from she didn't know how to be Christopher's mother, to she didn't know how to be a mother. And that speech bothered me because it always sounded to me like she was bailing again. She begged Eddie to let her back into Christopher's life (guilt? I guess?) and like, straight up bribed him with sex which was sure a choice, and then decides -- for a second time -- that she's out. It sounded, to me, she was handing Eddie papers and maybe, in a few years, possibly, once she'd had "time" to "figure out how to be someone's mother" she would try again. Just like she had in the interim between leaving when Christopher was little and the time of season 2.
And like, that could totally be a misunderstanding of the scene and what she was saying. It's what I took away from it, but that could very well be influenced by the fact I was raised by divorced parents and my dad had custody and if you count up all the time I spent with either parent when I was a minor, I was predominantly raised by my father and have had an especially tempestuous relationship with my mother that is mostly (sometimes) repaired now that I'm in my late twenties and have not lived with her since I was sixteen.
Back to the show, and to your comment that the fandom tends to treat Shannon like the Ultimate Evil and act like Eddie Did Nothing Wrong, I mean. Yeah. Fandom as a rule tends to shirk nuance. We're all fools here on the internet sitting in our blue industrial waste container crying about a wee woo show. I personally believe a more nuanced take on that might be that Eddie has shown a great capacity to learn from his mistakes (sometimes to make fun, shiny, new ones, but for the most part, just like ends up doing better the next time) and Shannon did not show that capacity in the time we knew her.
I think, depending on what they did with it, there was potential for an interesting storyline if they'd played through the divorce. I don't think it would've been rehashing ground covered by Michael and Athena's divorce because I can't see Eddie and Shannon having reached a point of amicability and friendship. The only thing we know they had in common was Christopher, and frankly, when you boil it down, the ways they engaged with Christopher as a person were so disparate that -- to me -- it really didn't seem like they had Christopher in common when you get right down to it. But I wouldn't have wanted to see Christopher and Eddie dragged through an ugly divorce process. They deserve better than that.
There's also a conversation to be had about Shannon's blatant ableism towards her own son, but that is extremely not my lane since I am not disabled myself. But even from an outside perspective, basically their entire parking lot conversation in Haunted, uh, haunts me with it's repugnance and the fact that instead of calling her on any of it, Eddie "Chronically touch starved" Diaz's response was to kiss her? Gosh golly do I wish that was one of the mistakes he learned from properly instead of finding a new, shiny version.
ANYWAY this got long, tl;dr (although if you clicked on the read more, you probably read it) version is No, Shannon is not the Ultimate Evil, she's a shitty mom not a demon in a skin suit and a pretty yellow sundress; and No, Eddie is not a flawless human who's never done wrong in his life but holy fuck is he trying and he'd be the first person to tell you he's made mistakes (and often has been); and no, sorry, I don't want to see the divorce storyline play out because we probably would've had to see either Eddie Bashing, Shannon Redemption, or Shannon turning up again like a cardboard cut out of a cartoon villain the way Eva did and I want to be witness to exactly zero of those things.
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missroserose · 3 years
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Fic Writer Question Meme!
Thanks for the tag, @venhedish—I love stuff like this! I'd apologize in advance for how long this is likely to be, but I suspect we share that tendency, haha.
How many works do you have on AO3?
20 total. I've been publishing there since late 2018, so about three years now. That sounds right for me—I'm way too perfectionist to ever be prolific.
What's your total AO3 word count?
125,744! Apparently it takes me three years to write a novel's worth of words I feel are worth publishing...which also sounds right.
How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?
Three, primarily: The Lost Boys, Stranger Things, and Supernatural. Mostly Stranger Things, since I was pretty enmeshed in the Harringrove community for about a year and a half, though these days I'm hanging out more with the SPN crowd. We'll see if that translates to more fics.
What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
1.) Sunflower (524) 2.) Quickly, look away (506) 3.) We'll Become Who We Meant To Be (383) 4.) Too Young To Fall In Love (333) 5.) When the Waters Start to Cross (283)
First, what's not surprising: all are Stranger Things/Harringrove works. I'm a little surprised to see that "Sunflower" had edged out "Quickly" as my most-kudosed story, for years it was the other way around—but maybe that's actually not that surprising—part of the reason I haven't been as active in the fandom is that I really love the darker and more complex renditions of Billy Hargrove's character (a la "Quickly") and since S3 aired it seems like the fashion has moved more towards more lighthearted fluff (a la "Sunflower"). Still, both are pretty undemanding smut, so it makes sense that they're on top; similarly, I'm not surprised to see "Too Young To Fall In Love" in the top five either.
I am a little surprised that "We'll Become Who We Meant To Be" is #3—it's honestly close to genfic, there's only the tiniest moment of hinted-at attraction in there. I'm not mad about it, I honestly feel like it's one of my better efforts; on the other hand, "Wake Me Up" was in a similar vein and it's close to the bottom. I guess there's just no telling what's going to catch on...in fairness, a 25K outsider POV novella is a much bigger ask than a 3K short story.
Honestly, I'm probably most surprised at "When the Waters Start to Cross" cracking the top five—it's a 52K+ WIP and a profoundly complex atmospheric existential horror/romance, which is, like, five strikes against it. I'm not mad about it, though—I love that fic, even if it is a huge time and energy suck, and it definitely contains some of my best writing.
Do you respond to comments, why or why not?
I do! Sometimes it takes me a while, but I genuinely appreciate people taking the time to leave feedback (even if it's just a string of emoji!). And every once in a while I'll get really thoughtful or incisive comments that spark whole conversations—that's one of the best reasons to write fic!
What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?
Hmm...to be honest, nothing immediately comes to mind; I love angst but tend to want it to serve a purpose, i.e. it gets a character closer to who they want to be. So most of my endings are at least hopeful. *checks list* It looks like probably my angstiest ending is also my first fic posted, "Blue Masquerade". Poor Michael.
Do you write crossovers? If so what is the craziest one you've written?
I don't currently write crossovers; I wouldn't rule it out, but frankly I haven't come across an idea that appeals to me. Waaaaaay back in the mists of time I had a Daria/Harry Potter crossover that I was actually pretty proud of, but I got about as far as getting them to Hogwarts and then kinda ran out of ideas, so I never posted it.
Have you ever received hate on a fic?
Not that I can think of? I'm not big-time enough to get hate, haha. Worst I ever got was some rando asking for top or bottom tags, which I just ignored, and one person on "We'll Become" who was like "I don't like this pairing but you did a good job", which kinda had me like ??? thanks, I guess? I did get one comment on "Quickly, look away" from someone who felt like it was in a different headspace from the fic I wrote it as a sequel to, but that didn't strike me as hate, it's a perfectly fair observation.
Do you write smut? If so what kind?
So first off, yes, and second...I recently came across this great Garth Greenwell quote that really gets at what I'm trying to do when I write smut:
In America in 2019 we are inundated with images of bodies to an absolutely unprecedented degree—images of eroticized bodies, images of sexual bodies; the Internet makes all our fantasies visible, and it trains us in new fantasies. And yet it also seems to me that our culture suffers from a dearth of representations of embodiedness, by which I mean of bodies imbued with consciousness. I’m not at all antiporn, but sometimes pornography (maybe especially Internet pornography, with its arms race of extremity) seems to want to evacuate bodies of personhood, to present them as objects. I think literature is the best technology we have for representing consciousness, and so I think there’s a kind of intervention that literature can perform in representing sex explicitly: it can reclaim the sexual body as a site of consciousness.
"Embodied porn" is probably the best description I can come up with—I love writing sex precisely because it's such a charged form of communication (Greenwell's words again), because there are things a character can do and say in that context that they never would normally. Like, sex acts are great and all, but what really does it for me is what's going on in their head, what's the history that brought the character to this point, how're they handling the inherent vulnerability and intimacy of this incredibly risky but potentially rewarding moment. Kink (whether through roleplaying, props, costumes, or whatever) is really just another way of adding to that personal meaning, since without the characters' reactions any trappings are meaningless.
Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Not that I know of!
Have you ever had a fic translated?
No, although I'd love to work with a translator someday (whether with fic or another context)—I'm fascinated by the inherent puzzles in translating between languages, especially with informal speech and its many idioms and cultural references.
Have you ever co-written a fic before?
Not yet! I'd be open to the idea, but it definitely has to be with the right person...
What's your all time favorite ship?
Isn't that basically like asking a mom to choose her favorite kid? Seriously, I like different things about all of them...which one's getting the most attention depends entirely on mood and headspace and other effectively random variables.
What's a WIP that you want to finish but don't think you ever will?
I don't have any I've given up on entirely, yet. Even Waters, as beastly complicated as it is, I've been ruminating on and adding to and arranging in my head lately...
What are your writing strengths?
Atmosphere, character, dialogue. I've said it before, I'm a capital-R Romantic at heart: I love writing settings that reflect and reinforce a character's headspace—while also implying what said character might be missing in their viewpoint.
Something I've noticed—my husband worked for years as a penetration tester, which meant he would regularly have to talk his way past people on a moment's notice. So, unsurprisingly, we both notice people, but he tends to observe their presentation (clothing, accessories, especially ones that're markers of social class and group belonging that allow him to tailor his approach), whereas I notice what they say and how they say it—and, often, what they don't say.
What are your writing weaknesses?
I suddenly feel like I'm in a job interview, haha. Perfectionism is a big one—I have a tendency to feel hopeless and quit if something's taking too long, rather than persisting until I get it sorted, even though some of my best work is stuff where I persisted. Also, I'm big on emotional intensity—which isn't a bad thing, necessarily, but I sometimes read back over my stuff and I'm like "geez, Ambrosia, ease up a bit"...I could definitely use some comic relief in my writing sometimes, but I think I'm often too insecure to try it.
What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?
I don't have any in particular—I rarely do it myself, because I don't trust myself to do it properly. (Perfectionism again!)
What was the first fandom you wrote for?
Daria, way back in the day. My work is still up on FF.net...sometimes I wonder if anyone's ever going to dig it up and confront me with it, haha. (I doubt anyone will ever care that much...I guess I'm more just curious if my style from twenty years ago is recognizably me.)
What's your favorite fic you've written?
If we're talking about finished fics, probably either "Wake Me Up" or "Young At Heart"—they're both pretty oddball, but both required a fuckton of work and both came out pretty close to what I wanted. But "Waters" is my biggest baby...maybe I'll open up Act III to work on today...
Thanks again for the tag, Ven! I'm going to tag @ihni, @redmyeyes, @twobrokenwyngs, @skybound2, @sambrosia, @shewritesdirty, @introvertia, @coffeeandchemicals, and @anarchist-billy—if you're up for some rumination, I'd love to hear your thoughts on your writing!
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