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holylulusworld · 2 years

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Kinktober 2022

Just like in 2019, 2020 & 2021 I am going to post a kinky, fluffy or scary one-shot from October 1st till October 31st 2022.

All upcoming stories got added now.

Please consider none of the stories are available until the set release date. Titles may change (all titles are working titles until release date.). The release date may change.

All stories contain smut, gore or horror elements. Please head the individual warnings for this event!!!

FANTASY/SMUT/FLUFF

October 1st: Irresistible Scent

Pairing: Alpha!Dean x Omega!Reader

Kink: Marking kink

October 2nd: Revenge served cold

Pairing: Andy Barber x fem!Reader

Kink: Cuckolding

October 3rd: Like Hell

Pairing: Alpha!Soldier Boy x Omega!Reader

Kink: A/B/O

A/N: requested

October 4th: Dance for me

Pairing: Demon!Dean x Stripper!Reader

Kink: Cock warming

October 5th: Forbidden Lust

Pairing: Stepdad!Bucky Barnes x fem!Reader

Kink: Homewrecker kink

October 6th: Mr. Orgasm (1) - Wrong Turn (Mr. Orgasm)

Pairing: Cultleader!Jensen Ackles x Author!Reader

Kink: Sex Cult

October 7th: Molded to perfection

Pairing: Steve Rogers x SextoyDesigner!Reader

Kink: big dick fetish

October 8th: Always daddy’s good girl sequel to Daddy’s good girl & Still daddy’s good girl

Pairing: John Winchester x fem!Reader

Kink: Daddy kink

October 9th: Best costume ever sequel to Is that a costume? & Where is your costume

Pairing: Wolverine x fem!Reader

Kink: Ripped clothes fetish

October 10th: Her concubines

Pairing: Dean x Fairy Queen!Reader x Sam

Kink: Feather play

October 11th: His favorite

Pairing: Alpha!Negan x Chubby(Omega)!Reader

Kink: Public sex

October 12th: Too much

Pairing: Nomad!Steve Rogers x fem!Reader

Kink: Cunnilingus + overstimulation + facesitting and a hint of beard burn

A/N: idea by @elle14-blog1

October 13th: Bearded Beast

Pairing: Andy Barber x fem!Reader

Kink: Beard fetish 😈

October 14th: Asgardian Possession

Pairing: Loki Laufeyson x fem!Reader

Kink: possessive behavior/possession

A/N: idea by anon

October 15th: Her big bear

Pairing: Alpha!Sam Winchester x Omega!Reader

Kink: Size kink

October 16th: Got milk?

Pairing: TFatWs!Bucky Barnes x pregnant!Reader

Kink: lactation kink

A/N: idea by @elle14-blog1

October 17th: Perfect ending sequel to New Discoveries & Greenest Green

Pairing: Jensen Ackles x fem!Reader

Kink: Roleplay

October 18th: Put it there

Pairing: Stucky x fem!Reader

Kink: Strap-ons

October 19th: Tight places - sequel to Cramped

Pairing: Soulless!Sam x fem!Reader

Kink: Claustrophilia

October 20th: Dad Jokes

Pairing: Andy Barber x fem!Reader

Kink: Dirty Talk

October 21th: Enemy Mine

Pairing: Biker!Bucky Barnes x fem!Reader

Kink: Exhibitionism (implied)

October 22nd: The strongest

Pairing: Dean Winchester x fem!Reader

Kink: Strength kink

October 23rd: Mustache Monster

Pairing: Lloyd Hansen x fem!Reader

Kink: Gunplay

October 24th: You, me, and your hands tonight

Pairing: Dean Winchester x fem!Reader

Kink: Quorofilia / Hand Fetish

October 25th: Normal, not boring

Pairing: Endgame!Steve Rogers x fem!Reader x TfatWs!Bucky Barnes

Kink: Breeding kink

A/N: idea by @elle14-blog1 & anon (Bucky)

October 26th: The gigolo

Pairing: Escort!Tony Stark x fem!Reader

Kink: Paid sex

October 27th: Scavenger hunt

Pairing: Winchesters x fem!Reader (Dean, Sam, John, not Wincest)

Kink: unuasual sex toys & foursome

A/N: idea by @moosekateer13

October 28th: Weather Goddess

Pairing: Thor Odinson x fem!Reader (X-Men)

Kink: Hyperspermia & Cum fetish

October 29th: Take my breath away

Pairing: CEO!Bucky Barnes x fem!Reader

Kink: daydreams

October 30th: Praise me like you should

Pairing: Sam Wilson x fem!Reader

Kink: Praise kink & dirty talk

A/N: idea by anon

Halloween Specials: ANGST/SMUT/HORROR

October 31st: His prey

Pairing: Nomad!SteveRogers x Innocent!Reader

Kink: stalking

A/N: idea by @elle14-blog1

October 31st: Carved

Pairing: Demon!Dean x fem!Reader; Sam x Girlfriend!Reader

Kink: Knife play

Find all other Bingos and Special Events here: Special Events

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theineffableoystercatcher · 2 months

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Vox: Last time I saw you, you were trying to kill everybody. Where are you at these days?

Alastor: It varies from moment to moment.

#alastor hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel vox #hazbin hotel #alastor the radio demon #vox hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel incorrect quotes #source: thor ragnarok

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worstloki · 3 days

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been thinking of Loki as a vengeful ghost/demon that tries to kill Thor after dying on Jotunheim except instead of killing Thor straightup Thor's on a quest following a trail of weird clues and strange happenings across multiple realms sort of? so Loki is just leading him around not showing himself but very much heartbroken in the distance about how Thor just 'moved on'. Meanwhile on Thor's end it's very evident in how Thor handles quests once Loki is gone that he still follows all the advice and suggestions Loki made, and tries to consider what Loki would have done when he does things.

#im not writing it because i have too many works in progress already but do you see my vision #do you understand the vibe i am going for #tragic death Loki and Thor who never processed Loki's death beyond 'he's not here right now'#and this is maybe like. way after Loki's death. like at least a century later so no Thor doesn't immediately suspect anything #is it strange that he's witnessed multiple similar occurrences and connecting clues across multiple realms like they're for him?#yes.#but he thinks he's being so suave and detective about solving this mystery and suspects a powerful malicious demon figure to be behind it #not his dead brother who he feels wholly responsible for having died since he was the one that dragged them to Jotunheim for fun #Loki who died confused and resentful about so many things and upon realizing he's Not Exactly Stayed Dead deciding he was abandoned #because no one returned for his body but they also never explained anything to him which meant he had to seek answers himself AFTER HE DIED #reasonable to say he wasn't happy about it and isn't out to hurt random strangers #but Thor and Asgard?#he has a vendetta and he has it planned out so neatly #sans the part where he actually. kills Thor. because he only thinks he wants that #he would do it too if Thor didn't get reasonable about Loki wanting revenge at the end #'when did Thor get mature' Loki wonders bitterly. like it's such a mystery

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theunkown-yachirusan · 9 months

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The Crimson Moon

Chapter 1

Y/n P.o.v

It has been 13 years working for the Supreme God of Norse Pantheon and his family and ever since then I became friends with Lord Thor and Lord Loki. I do not need to pretend I'm happy around them when I was, but I still need to keep up the act to know about what happenings around and to never let ANY suspicions rise, as this is for the sake of the association and the safety of everyone. The Celestial beings has blessed us with the power to protect everyone, our abilities became effective to demons and Immortal beings like Gods since then, for example I use Genjutsu to a God to make them forget about what happened.

I was currently waiting for the return of my Lords when I felt a chakra, no, a mind communication with all the squadron. I immediately go to my room, and I close my eyes and focus.

"Well this is such a shitty of them" it's Hidan's voice

"Shut it will you you are as stressful to deal as those demons"

It seems I shall need to speak right now "If it isn't interesting to know what makes you fuss over it Kakuzu-san"

"RAHHH FINALLY UKIKO IS HERE"

"That's definitely not the alpha-samas name inosuke" zenitsu said in a annoyance

"Will you shut up?" Another annoyed voice, it was Sanemi most definitely trying hard not to yell too.

"Ahh I'm so sorry,inosuke please stop, I'm so sorry Y/n-sama" Tanjiro said in panic

"AHAHAHAHA The kids sure are rowdy"

" Yeah so does you,hashirama"

"ACKK-?!!"

"Enough everyone,please state what it is, why you suddenly called a meeting Inoichi-san? As far as I know you were with Obito-san and the Investigator group that is assigned to roam around right now, is there something wrong?"

"Yes ma'am, Lady Brunhilde has informed me of something everyone would like to know and surely The Norse Gods are about to return there..."

There was a long silence before the next thing he said shook all of us.

"Upon the meeting of the Gods, they have decided to eradicate the humanity and Brunhilde will have to meet everyone once and for all"

Everyone's thoughts immediately became the voices in the communication. But then a word was heard.

"We should be calm upon this time and let Lady Brunhilde handle this." Lord Ubuyashiki finally spoke

"We all know the agreements correct?The squadron of Alpha and Beta are only the shadows of the Delta squad and therefore we shall support them and be on our guard." I finally spoke

"We shall discuss about this when I leave this place tonight" I added

And with that the meeting ended, but then Itachi speaks with me through Inoichis mind jutsu.

"Are you okay?"

"Of course I am brother-"

"Are you okay leaving the people who became a another family to you? And leaving the person who've come to love you dearly? Are you okay not hearing his reason?"

"...I did not say I wouldn't listen to what he want to say"

"Hmph, and you did not deny the ' person who've come to love you' part" Madara suddenly spoke

"Do not fret about me and as much as we know we don't want their suspicions became true. I shall focus on my situation and you should too. Itachi I leave things to you"

"Yes sister" ....after that

I cannot get the thought of Thor agreeing about this, I shall ask Brunhilde about it when she got back. I finally felt their presence and chakra and my mask is on again. I saw them at the entrance and Lord Odin's crows is unnaturally silent but suddenly Lord Odin speaks to me.

"We would like to talk to you Lady Y/n, it is about the subject in our meeting"

My eyes widened "huh, of course Lord Odin"

I can feel Thor's eyes upon me and I chose to ignore it. When we are finally at the throne room with Lord Loki and Thor with us Lord Odin spoke slowly.

"Lady Y/n I must inform you about what happened and what is the topic and you have the free will to speak then. Zeus has once again ask of the Gods opinions and decision as to what to do with you humans and the final decision is to End the Humanity once and for all"

Lord Odin stopped and is looking for my reaction and right now, the face they can only see is the shock expression painted on my face.

"But before it happens, Brunhilde then interfer on the meeting and a Fight between Humanity and Gods was declared."

I did not wait for any of them speak after Lord Odin talk.

"What would you like me to do then my Lord?" I just questioned as I became calm.

This definitely shocked them to see me calm about a crucial subject since this is a Life or Death situation. Thor then spoke.

"I would like to be honest with you Lady Y/n."

When I look at him I can see how his eyes change. The look of sadness and pain and there was something else them that I cannot pick on. Lord Odin surely did not expect that Thor would suddenly speak as he would just stay silent and just listen, even Lord Loki was Shocked about this.

"If I would be honest with you Lady Y/n I did not agree or disagree upon this and surely you know me as I would never talk. I- we would like to know what would you do, what is your thoughts about this and are you..?" He trailed.

I would be lying if I said I'm not shocked when Thor is speaking when it was Infront of his father and Loki. I am entirely stunned but I know I have to follow my own plan and as much as I love him I have to leave him, I want to protect him without him knowing and that I betrayed him for doing this, for hiding who I really was. I started to become calm once again.

" Is that so, then, I would like to return to my family and reunite with them again. I do not know how I would react to all of this but it has been decided and I have no right to stop it as I am nothing but a mere mortal" it hurts but I have to...I want to protect them even if it's in the shadows and even if it's the last thing I do for him, for Thor. I then added

"It would make others think that I am trying to be on your good sides my Lords-"

"Please I insist that when it was just us drop the formalities Lady Y/n" and the most shocking thing for all three of us is Lord Odin saying to 'Drop the formalities'. We are all, Thor,Loki and I has jaws dropped. But Loki recovered faster than us.

"And since uncle said so y/n you should call us by our names then even if we are enemies from now on" He said happily.

"Even if it's the very last moment for each of us this is the only moment we have to be ourselves". He added

"Very well then, everyone might think I was trying to get onto your good side it is why I chose to be with my family once again." I said smiling

"Y/n... You are a great human, you have been a great friend to both of me and my family. I may not be the best at showing it but you have my gratitude Lady Y/n I thank you for serving the Pantheon" Lord Odin spoke

'I can't help but-' my tears freely fall 'I didn't experience nor hear other people speaks a heartfelt gratitude yet I heard it from The Allfather himself, even though I was a human'

"I too thank you Odin,Thor and Loki for having trust to me, even though I was only a mortal and can die at any moment" I laughed.

After several hours of talking they also invite me to have dinner with them before I take my leave but I cannot help but think about Thor. As he seems even more sad than Loki and Odin combine and is holding back something which makes me think that he might want to talk to me but it was rather late as I am currently on my way to Japanese Pantheon to meet everyone including the chosen humans.

Thor's P.o.v

I should have oppose to this, sure those mortals has become nothing but parasites that kills earth but not all of them was. But thinking about it. It has been 5 years ever since knowing her and her family and yet whenever I would confess to her everything does not go well and was being interrupted by anything and anyone.

I want to tell her so badly as she was so delicate, such beauty that is more than every Goddesses, like a sunflower to my dark stormy days. She is the only one who could lighten my day. When I first lay my eyes I know immediately that it was her as soon as we met on a one rainy afternoon.

When she was far away,I just looked at the way she takes. I felt someone behind me... "It was your chance my son."

"And yet I wasted it... Again" I answered my father.

"Do not fret, I know how much she love you too and even if you may not know it yourself I have always watching her carefully as she can be rather unpredictable"

" The fate of humanity is at the hands of Brunhildes chosen Champions I should get myself ready " I just spoke with sadness.

" My son ...do not let those feelings get the better off you" My father speaks.

I did not turn to him, I just walk back inside. With a picture of her smile flashes in my memory.

Loki P.o.v

It was painful to see Thor like this and it also hurts me too that a Human friend of mine, the only person I can have fun around with is going to die at the decision many Gods agreed. I can only just sigh and think.

If I would be honest, she is the most hideous person I know, since whenever I ask about her past she would avoid it with talking about another topic. Its really frustrating of her to be so hideous. It's been 5 years and yet I cannot get her to speak. I just sighed...

'What is in that little head of yours, Y/n?'

'How come I can never be able to read you?'

I just sighed in frustration... She's the only human who is mysterious to me.

3rd persons P.o.v

"It's about time"

*Brunhilde explaining everything*

"Revolutionary group, Kamaboko squad, Rengoku-san, Tengen-san and Shinobu-san along with Tobirama and Obito. You will be assigned to be on guard incase a demon or anyone who would rebel will attack. Investigators Ino-Shika-cho along with Minato-san, Neji,Shisui and Hyuga twins be also on guard you would be the one who will keep on track on those demons if ever they chose to appear"

"YES SIR"

"Y/n-sama would you like to meet them." Brunhilde speaks.

They were in a unfamiliar place, it would seems that they are in a conference hall. Unknown figures can be seen in the darkness of the room, light of the candles are the only things that gives light in the mysterious room of many other unfamiliar people.

"Why of course we shall welcome them to our association after all they are the ones who will ensure the survival of humanity". Y/n spoke, red eyes looking directly to Brunhilde.

"I humbly welcome all of you, my fellow men, I am sure Lady Brunhilde have explained everything. We shall discuss every possibility of surprise attacks of the demons and the happenings on your fight with the God's" Y/n stated.

"AHAHAHAHA....It was an honor to work under you y/n-san" Kojiro spoke joyfully.

"Ahh I quite agree with you Kojiro-san it really is right kondo-san?" Okita also speaks.

"Not to mention, many unfamiliar people too".

"I agree with you" Kondo replied

Y/n's serious and cold facade turns friendly.

"I'm so glad that Lady Brunhilde has chosen you guys, yet I was quite worried for your well-being". She suddenly looked worried.

"But enough, we shall focus what's ahead. Since... tomorrow is the day whether we live or not" She became serious and started the discussion.

But there is only one thought remains in her head.

"How long will they be able to hide the identity of The Guardians Association?"

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clubmega · 6 months

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https://www.teepublic.com/t-shirt/733019-rbell-thunder-god

#shirt #sci-fi #occult #teepublic #club megatrip #tee #t-shirt #comics #demon #devil #Thor

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violette-hue · 1 year

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Matchups

In honor of reaching 1k followers, I’ll be doing some matchups with small drabbles! This event will be open until i hit my next milestone. Here are the rules:

Follow me

Reblog this post

Via ask box (not dm), send in: 1) Your pronouns, 2) Preferred gender/sexuality, 3) Fandom, 4) A quick description of your personality (including likes/dislikes, hobbies, etc.)

A prompt from the prompt list (please specify NSFW* or SFW)

I won’t be doing any slots, but please be patient with me 💕 I’ll try to get these out as soon as I can.

* I will only write NSFW for blogs that are 18+. The anon feature will be turned off for this event so I can double check that the person sending the request is not a minor. If I cannot find your age on your blog, I will default the request to SFW.

I will not answer my dms for matchups requests unless you have a question.

Prompt List:

“What are you doing here?”

Holding their hands

Trying to cook their favorite dish

Softly rubbing your nose against theirs

Doing together in the rain

Kissing in the rain

Caressing their cheek

Smiling in between kisses

Fixing their tie

Pulling them close while sleeping

Slow dancing

Leaving small love notes

“Come to bed. Please?”

“Thank you for picking me up—I know it’s late”

Trapped in an elevator

“I didn’t have anywhere else to go”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you”

“You need to eat. You’ll feel better after that”

“Stop looking at me like that. People might get the impression that you’re soft.”

“First time?” “Don’t get cheeky with me.”

Fandoms:

Haikyuu

Demon Slayer

Jujutsu Kaisen

Inuyasha

Harry Potter

Game of Thrones / House of Dragon

The Witcher

A Court of Thorns and Roses

Marvel

Don’t see your fandom? Send in an ask to see if I’ve heard of it 💕

A/N: Thank you all for helping me reach this milestone!

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kanroji-san · 2 days

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Kanae!Y/n/Reader AU

Kanae!Y/n: *Taking Thor’s pulse* Your pulse is pretty fast, are you alright?

Thor: Yeah, sorry, let me just relax a bit.

Kanae!Y/n: It’s alright, just take a deep breath for me honey, you’ll be fine.

Thor: *flustered* …

Kanae!Y/n: Eh? Why is your heart rate increasing?

I can't-She is so pretty

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loversquarrels · 1 year

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First Hunt

The shithead Brothers begrudgingly took out their sister one day to Svartalfheim. On their adventure they came across a baby dreki and helped Thurd slay the creature.

Upon return, Thrud displayed her accomplishment to her father. And even if he would never utter the words, he was proud. He knew she would be a warrior in no time.

After this, he picked her up in his strong arms and went off to feast on the fallen creature. That night, Thrud never stopped smiling as she knew she would one day become a valkyrie. She was sure of it.

#thor god of war #thrud god of war #young thrud is a crazy demon #god of war ragnarok #gow ragnarok #fanart #gow fanart #thor #thor is a proud papa #the shithead brothers are proud too

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dougielombax · 3 months

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Okay.

Here we go again.

(This is a small redux due to editing issues)

Parallels.

Seeing Patterns in Things that Aren’t There

Part 30.

(First Parallels post of 2024!)

Falling in Reverse

1. “I have been falling for thirty minutes!” - Loki. Thor: Ragnarok (2017).

2. “Outside the bunker I encountered two beings. The demon and the monster. The monster distracted me as the demon opened the earth beneath me. I fell and fell and fell. I fell for hours. I landed in a room with a television. A TV? Or a mirror?” - Cthonaut A (modern day universe). The Monument Mythos: Season Four - Alcatraz, Always (2024)

This one was meant more as a joke but I still thought it was worth putting together anyway.

One could make comparisons between Cthonaut A’s experience and that of Virginia Arnoldson (all of her). The video even does so itself. Sort of.

Loki’s fall on its own is but a minor predicament compared to the shit that Virginia (all of her) and Cthonaut A end up going through.

Still.

Make of this what you will.

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thebibliomancer · 8 months

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Essential Avengers: Avengers #299: I <3 NY

January, 1989

Mr. Fantastic -- Invisible Woman -- and the Captain versus the... ORPHAN-MAKER?!

Whew, a lot to react to here.

First, hello, 1989! We’re almost 90s here!

Two, ugh, Orphan-Maker and presumably Nanny. Do we have to?

Thirdly, and on the topic of do we have to... Wow, it is going to be a sour feeling when the Avengers 300 issue milestone is a tie-in to an X-Men event. Because it doesn’t end here, in 299.

I know that’s just how things lined up, time-wise. Even Daredevil got choked by a vacuum and had to fight a dentist/cop/truck man. But it is sour. Especially on the heels of all the Dr Druid stuff. The Avengers have one of their best runs and then it all goes to shit and the team is disbanded. And then their big new roster moment takes place during Inferno, fighting X-foes.

Not an auspicious start.

But we haven’t started that start yet.

Right now we have no Avengers, Inferno, a Fantastic Four crossover?, and a the Captain.

How did we get here? That’s a long story. Here’s the short version.

Nebula Ravonna Kang wanted a super-weapon hidden in a bubble in time and she needed the Avengers to help her because of a predestination thing. So she took over the team by corrupting Dr Druid with sex and power fantasies. Dr Druid manipulated Captain Marvel into a depowering and then took over the team. Then he and Nebula Kang Ravonna mind-controlled the three remaining Avengers and took them on a field trip to the time bubble. Where the mind control was broken by three random Kangs, the Avengers fought against Kang Nebula Ravonna and Dr Druid, and then those two fell into a time hole. Plot unsatisfactorily resolved, Thor disbanded the Avengers.

And now we’re now.

This has to be an ironic title, right?

I know the Daredevil tie-in ended with a ‘hell yeah, New York, WHOO!’ moment but that’s Daredevil. I’m almost positive he’s a masochist.

Anyway, between Avengers 298 and now, the Inferno thing has kicked in full swing. Firebrand from Gargoyle’s Quest is attacked tourists. And a motorcycle that turned into a motorcycle robot man attacks the Captain.

Who punches it in the face and turns it back into a motorcycle and rides off on it.

The Captain is pretty unflappable.

I guess the motorcycle had a radio because the Captain hears a report about a major battle at 45th St.

He motorcycles that way and finds there are a bunch of Inferno demons causing trouble but that an unknown group of heroes are giving them a tough time.

Unknown to the Captain. But maybe not to the reader.

(It’s the New Mutants.)

They look like dorks in their shhh we’re sneaking out to endanger our lives, don’t tell Magneto outfits.

Anyway, they’re fighting demons. They’re doing a good job of fighting demons.

If you remember from Evolutionary War, Danielle Moonstar got her powers boosted so she can physically manifest things instead of just illusions now. So she wants to manifest a demon’s greatest fear and the Captain coincidentally shows up and swings a demon into a light pole.

Obviously, everyone first assumes that this weird dude on a motorcycle is the demon’s greatest fear.

In fairness, he looks like dollar store knockoff Captain America.

They don’t recognize him is what I’m saying.

The Captain doesn’t recognize them either. There’s just so many heroes around now and so many X-books.

Cannonball comments that the Captain looks like Captain America, which Steve unhelpfully answers that he and Captain America are old friends.

Are you hiding that you were Captain America, Steve? What’s your game here?

(And Cannonball basically figures out from that coy answer that the Captain is Captain America anyway so. Good job?)

The Captain asks the New Mutants hey what the fuck is going on?

And Cannonball gives Cap the quick and dirty synopsis. There’s a bunch of demons from Limbo causing trouble. S’ym (who is a very, very loose reference to Cerebus the Aardvark) is leading some of them in an invasion of New York. And there’s another demon called N’astirh, possibly because David Sim sternly asked Marvel to stop loosely referencing his stuff, which is rich when you remember all the references in Cerebus. Anyway, N’astirh is doing some nastier stuff involving sacrificing babies. He’s the dude that’s been messing with Madelyne Pryor but I don’t have time to go into Inferno stuff. Please don’t make me.

POINT BEING: that’s the situation.

Unlike Magneto, the Captain doesn’t have a problem with the New Mutants risking their lives. I mean, look how much he risked Bucky! So he tells them good luck fighting demons.

And decides to go recruit some more friends into the fight.

Speaking of things I don’t want to get into but in this case I will.

The Eternals.

After Jack Kirby’s Eternals run wrapped up, some loose ends were tied off in Thor. Usual Eternal leader Zuras is dead, currently, and his daughter Thena is leadering.

And she’s got brave new ideas.

Like letting the Forgotten One out of his jail.

The Forgotten One is an Eternal that’s been in Eternal jail for so long that everyone has forgotten his name. And/or he had his name stricken from the collective minds of Eternals, depending on when you ask. But his deal is that he’s All the Coolest Heroes, Actually. Just a cool Eternal mistaken for Gilgamesh and Hercules and so on.

What? You’re saying that there actually is a Hercules who also claims the same adventures?

Yeah, they were operating in the same area in the same time doing a lot of the same stuff.

Look, Jack Kirby loves Ancient Astronauts and Eternals wasn’t really supposed to be in the Marvel Universe.

Anyway, this guy is gonna be called Gilgamesh so I’ll call him Gilgamesh.

He’s just a big, buff dude with the Prince Valiant haircut.

Since he’s a monster fighting man, Thena sends him to help out with New York’s invasion of demons.

Since time is of the essence, Gilgamesh stops to forge an entire new set of armor and a new sword.

Priorities!

Meanwhile, in Connecticut. The Connecticut Richardses.

Franklin is scared because he had a premonition that a “bogey man” is coming so Sue lets Franklin squeeze into bed with her and Reed.

NOT A PANEL LATER, Nanny and the Orphan-Maker show up in their spaceship.

Orphan-Maker deactivates all the alarm systems and breaks into the house.

He uses some “pixie sand” to make sure Franklin stays asleep. And then he does the thing his name is.

He’s the Orphan-Maker. He makes orphans.

He pulls a gun to blow Reed’s brains out but Franklin astral projected (to Orphan-Maker’s confusion) and called for Sue.

Sue doesn’t wake up but apparently she reflexively threw up an invisible shield over the bed.

Phew. Imagine if two of the original Fantastic Four died in an Avengers book to an X-Men villain! Fans would riot!

The Orphan-Maker decides to just skedaddle with Franklin and does.

NOT A PANEL LATER, the Captain shows up.

Nobody answers when he knocks on the door in the middle of the night.

HOW SUSPICIOUS.

So he investigates.

(In fairness, he sees the damage Orphan-Maker left breaking into the place.)

So Captain America breaks in through the same window Orphan-Maker left open and finds Reed and Sue sleeping under an invisible force field.

Which he can see, somehow.

Get your eyes checked, Cap. That’s not how invisibility works.

When he touches the shield, it FDSSSPT!s away and Reed and Sue wake up.

Sue says she had a weird dream about using her force field powers (AND THEN WHEN SHE WOKE UP THE PILLOW WAS GONE?) but quickly realizes that Franklin is missing and has parent panic.

Reed leaps into action.

First, he SOMEHOW recognizes that a dude called the Captain wearing a patriotic-ish uniform and carrying a shield is, in fact, Captain America.

He asks Cap what’s going on with him but Cap says that his thing can wait until after the demon invasion/child kidnapping thing.

Second, Reed activates the super-advanced security system.

Sure, the alarm lines were super obvious and easy to cut but the security cameras were running the whole time and captured everything.

Reed doesn’t recognize the armored dude that stole Franklin or the ship he got into but either way, he’s able to track the energy signature of the ship... TO NEW YORK.

Which is where the demon invasion is. Convenient!

Mr and Mrs Fantastic and their good pal the Captain get in a Fantasti-Car and zoom off.

Meanwhile, in the Eternal city of Olympia, Gilgamesh finishes his new armor.

Go back to the drawing board, ya dingus.

Most of it is fine, I guess. And gold and brown isn’t over-represented in the WORST ROSTER so they’re perfectly fine colors. The bull-head helmet looks dumb though.

Also, despite spending time making a new sword, he’s decided that since he hasn’t wielded any weapon in a while, he’s too rusty. So he’s just going to use his FISTS.

Gilgamesh: “I am long out of practice. A weapon too long in the scabbard whose edge has been dulled by time and rust. This will hone me again.”

Meanwhile, above New York City, Nanny leaves Orphan-Maker to pilot the airship while Nanny checks on Franklin.

Nanny is surprised that Franklin is so hard to keep asleep. She runs some scans on him and is further surprised at Franklin’s mutations (hahah cursed future knowledge).

She asks the sleeping kid what his name is and has a panic when he says Franklin Richards and that his mom and dad are Susan and Reed.

Nanny calls Orphan-Maker (Peter) and asks him if he really orphan-made Franklin’s parents and calls him out for lying when he lies about it.

So she swats his robot palm with an electro-switch. Because why not.

Nanny has a Concern now because they kidnapped MR FANTASTIC AND INVISIBLE WOMAN’S KID and didn’t KILL MR FANTASTIC AND INVISIBLE WOMAN!

Hey, I can’t see things going well for you either if you’d half of the first family of Marvel comics.

Now there’s a What If concept.

Anyway, Nanny has a Plan for dealing with PISSING OFF HALF OF THE FANTASTIC FOUR and she heads into the forge to go prepare.

She has a forge on her spaceship. Why wouldn’t she.

The Fantastic Three of Reed, Sue, and the Captain catch up to Nanny’s ship and Reed (gently) knocks it out of the sky with an energy drain.

The Fantasti-Car can do that. Why wouldn’t it?

Nanny’s ship bounces to a very safe and not at all hazardous stop in a park.

The Captain jumps out of the Fantasti-Car instead of waiting for it to park and lands on Nanny’s ship.

Orphan-Maker comes out and starts throwing fisticuffs and the Captain is surprised that the robot-suit dude doesn’t even flinch when Cap gets under his guard and hits him with his Captain vibranium shield. And further surprised when the dude bonks him in the head.

Invisible Sue finds that her powers just slide off Orphan-Maker. Like he’s got some kind of screening device protecting him.

Orphan-Maker hoists the Captain into the air to throw him but Mr Fantastic just snatches him out of O-M’s grip.

Then Orphan-Maker pulls a regular ass gun on Mr Fantastic.

I don’t know why this is so funny to me.

Maybe because he’s pretty clearly a child in a highly advanced robot suit and he pulls out a normal gun.

It has similar energy to those dragonball fanimated videos where characters who can blow up the world panic if someone pulls a gun.

The Captain just throws his not-as-mighty-but-still-pretty-mighty shield and smashes the gun. And when the shield boomerangs back, Cap throws it again and hits Orphan-Maker under the chin. Since the suit is tough but Cap noticed where its weak points were while he was getting hoisted.

Anyway, after getting bonked in the chin with a still-pretty-mighty-shield, Orphan-Maker sits and cries to Nanny that the mean men hurt him.

It starts to dawn on the Captain that inside this robot suit there’s just a small child but he doesn’t get to wrestle over this suspicion long because a different and red robot suit comes out of Nanny’s ship and bonks Cap in the head. Knocking him the fuck out.

People keep punching him in the head today.

Anyway, this is probably, definitely Franklin. Nanny is the kind of sicko who’d put a child in a robot suit and make him kill his own parents.

What a creep.

And she looks like an egg.

Mr Fantastic and Invisible Woman now realize that they’ve actually got to contribute to the fight more.

Invisibsue uses force fields to blow a mouth flamethrower so that Reedtastic can get in close and tangle around the new red guy.

But Red-Suit electrifies the exterior of the robot suit. Knocking Reed the fuck out.

Sue realizes that this new red guy doesn’t have a protective screen so she puts an invisible force field around him.

But red dude is beefy and punches through the force field bubble. And she can’t put up another bubble fast enough! But she has enough time to verbalize that she can’t put up another bubble in time!

With Cap unconscious and being sat on by Orphan-Maker and Reed unconscious, nobody is left to save her- Nah, just kidding.

Gilgamesh shows up in a flash of lightning.

I didn’t know he had lightning powers.

Was this supposed to be Thor?

It even does the KRACKTHOOM!

Anyway, Gilgamesh blasts red guy away from Sue.

Nanny comes out of the ship tsk-ing that another hero showed up.

She yells at red guy that his “homework isn’t complete yet! I want these people dead! All of them! And I want them dead now!”

Red guy (it’s Franklin. Its clearly Franklin. Even Sue and Reed realize that its Franklin by now) says he doesn’t want to kill people dead but Nanny threatens to take away his nice robot suit and what’s more “there’ll be no dessert for a month!”

Red Franklin: “Oh, no, Nanny! Not that!”

Nanny is actually pleased that Reed and Sue have finally realize because the knowledge will surely prevent them from fighting back seriously.

(What Nanny doesn’t know is that Reed has put Franklin in a coma at least once.)

Gilgamesh points out that Red Franklin isn’t his son and he’d gladly kill him to stop him from killing his own parents.

Invisible Woman: “Reed, what are we going to do?”

The Captain, who I didn’t know was named Reed: “Offhand, Susan, I’d say we were in for the trickiest fight of our lives!”

Nanny: “What’s so tricky about it? All you have to do is die!”

I say we let Gilgamesh crack this egg. In the violence sense.

Follow @essential-avengers because that’s the place. Like, reblog, and comment because it makes me feel good about spending my time liveblogging. Yell at an egg today. That’s no yolk.

#avengers #essential avengers #no avengers #Nanny and the Orphan Maker #the Captain #Mr Fantastic #Invisible Woman #Gilgamesh #Franklin Richards #new mutants #various demons #inferno #eternals #tags are short today #because there's no team #fuckin thor

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