#but as it is i hope it's both funny and clear all the same. aro bart is dear to me. lesbian disaster cassie as well

[mamawasatesttube]

one of the funniest aro traits i have is that i NEVER notice people i know being romantically into each other. they can be the most obviously pining couple in the world flirting ridiculously hard right in front of me and ill just be like wow, look at us three besties all just hanging out :) and then they'll be like btw we're dating now! and ill go WHAT???? oh that was romance??? WHOA. like yay happy for you!!! i just didn't clock it at all whatsoever!!!! (part of this is that im just an affectionate person with my friends and ill happily flirt with my besties and physically lay all over them with absolutely no romantic intent. so i forget that sometimes people are flirty or always concerned with each other for romantic reasons. like. EVERY time it's just oh YEAH... i forgor again...)

anyways, i like to hand this to bart allen, aroace extraordinaire. guy who just straight up forgets romance is real and not something they made up for video games with romanceable companions. he's happy for his friends when they say they're dating someone, bc they're happy so yay! but until they come out and say it he will NOT clock any sort of romance going on.

now i also like to imagine that when the gang are all like in their late teens to early 20s, there's some RIDICULOUS lesbian drama going on. cassie and cissie have been kinda sorta dancing around each order for ages, but then after kon's death and resurrection cassie got distant and cissie and anita started spending more and more time together, and cassie isn't proud to admit it but she maaaay have gotten jealous and fucked rose about it, and now cissie is giving her the cold shoulder. and rose keeps flirting with cissie even though she and cassie keep having unplanned hookups, and anita just asked cassie to be her plus one to a wedding and cassie is shocked she didn't ask cissie and what's going on?! is anita hitting on her??? omg??? wait but what's going on with cissie?? and....

anyway, all of this to say cassie is going the fuck Through it and it's a mess that she keeps bemoaning to kon while languishing on his couch and eating all his ice cream (kon is listening wide-eyed like "wow. if i ever need romantic advice, i'll ask you and then do the exact opposite of whatever you say.") this whole ridiculous affair is going on for months.

until one day there's a core four sleepover and kon is like soooo is it the time of night where we start unpacking the latest developments in cassie's love life? and cassie goes AUURGHGHRHH!!!! yes but oh my god shut up don't say it like that auugghhhh

and bart just looks at her and tilts his head like a puppy dog and asks "wait. you have a love life?? since when???"

silence.

cassie gawks. kon looks positively gleeful.

and then tim starts laughing so hard he doubles over and accidentally slams his head into the corner of the coffee table hard enough to get a mild concussion. bart's aro swag claims yet another victim

#rimi talks #im half asleep in bed with a migraine as i type this and im sure i could phrase it better were that not the case #but as it is i hope it's both funny and clear all the same. aro bart is dear to me. lesbian disaster cassie as well #aro bart who forgets abt romance and lesbian disaster cassie together = prime comedy routine #you see it right?? #cassie #bart #kon #core four

[heartslobbf]

thoughts on juri gender + juriori 🎤

so many thoughts. arguably too many. i have cherrypicked the ones i think are most interesting/original for you <3

i guess the thing with juri's gender is that she somehow manages to degender herself in the public eye, unless someone like ruka or shiori comes along and prods at her and makes everyone else realise how queer (in both senses) she is. also whilst i love butch juri truthers with my whole heart and think yall rock, she is a femme to me. bc i am a femme and juri is probably the rgu character i most relate to, which is cringe and lame but you know whatever. if i didnt relate to her i would probably be a butch truther too bc i am a butch lover first human second. i think it is her experiences with gender that most resonate with me, bc of how her gender and lesbianism are just. they are one and the same the venn diagram is a circle and it's just like Yeah. im an aromantic lesbian so whilst i have complicated feelings about Girls and have had a handful of teenage lesbian situationships that fucked me up, i dont Quite relate to juri's angst. that's not a critique of it whatosever, to be clear, because the purpose of art is not relatability, but im talking about how juri is relatable to me as a character so you know. you get it.

i have so much love in my heart for people whose fave is juri i really really do. probably because you are all lesbians and i love lesbians. my fave is anthy but a) you knew that already and b) she is also a lesbian and (imho) an aro-spec one at that. anyway you didnt ask about anthy so i prommy i wont talk about her anymore (lie). i also wont talk anymore about my aromantic readings of rgu (lie).

asking me about juriori is a fun one, because you might want a considered analysis of their relationship within canon, and you will get some of that, but you'll also get my unhinged ramblings about shipping culture. i feel i should disclose that by 'shipping culture' i mean shippy fandom antics and not, like, the presence of romantic relationships in rgu. that's super interesting and i have a lot to say about it, but what isn't super interesting to me is like.. committing a lot of time to intricately imagining the adult lives of rgu characters in monogamous amatonormative domestic relationships with one another, or whatever the hell. not juicy or nuanced or messy or interesting TO ME, an aromantic person who loves conflict, so you know. you (generally, not anon) do you, but it doesnt grip me personally. i DO enjoy fanart of the characters aged up and happy, for two reasons: the fashion, and the way that it's thematically consistent with rgu. it's like a glimpse at their future you know?? it's a glimmer of hope, or whatever.

ANYWAY, my hot juriori take is that i dont know if theyd work out as a romantic relationship, but i also wouldnt categorically say they wouldnt, because the whole point of the rgu ending is like 'fuck knows what'll happen, but you better fucking hope and you better believe in these characters' ability to choose for themselves and escape the trappings of the narrative'. whatever happens happens. this is of course problematic when i, as a writer, have occasionally attempted an rgu fic, bc im always like well fuck idk what juriori would be doing!! that's not for me to decide!! and it's like im literally writing this story it 100% is for me to decide and then i just get annoyed about the 'ethics' of writing rgu fic and get sad about forcing these kids into the narrative over and over and give up. im a normal person btw. i envy people who can write banger rgu fic more than anyone on the earth you guys are wizards to me.

juriori are also kind of funny to me bc all of their conflict stems from the cisheteropatriarchy of it all and how that's shaped their perceptions of themselves, each other and the wider world. like they are just the teenage lesbian situationship girlies and i think that's beautiful. just like me fr. you know for me personally, kiryuu sibling aficionado, it's quite nice to think about juriori and reminisce about my own teenage lesbian situationships as a kind of break from all of the Horrors. they're wonderfully (mostly) disconnected from akio in a way that just makes me skip with joy. that being said, if youve ever seen me talk about azure paler than the sky, you know it's one of my top ten episodes of the show and my favourite duel in the show and also, simply, fucking Agonising. i do think that juri episodes, visually, are some of the strongest in the show.

my other big juriori point that i wanna hit is that shiori is soooooooo noli me tangere for caesars i am coded. if youre unfamiliar with whoso list to hunt i know where is an hynde, what i'm trying to say here is that shiori loves to be hopelessly pursued because it's the only meaningful way she can exert power over others as a 'princess'. but princesses cant exert power over others by definition of being princesses, so she's really a witch. just like the deer in whoso list. but im normal about renaissance poetry, what i really want to say is how compelled i am by shiori's witchification and how oblivious so many people are to it when watching the show even though she's literally ourple. you know, the witch colour. and she's a reddish ourple!!! you know, red. the duplicitous bitch colour!!!!!

ourple is arguably also that colour in rgu, but i feel compelled to point out anthytougaisms at all possible opportunities. the anthy-touga-shiori triad is like. world's most concentrated source of internalised homophobia, machiavellian bull and general malintent towards people who sincerely love you. and i love them. especially shiori because truly why is she like that. like i know why she's like that but it's funny to marvel at how deranged she truly is. no one does it like her fr and i have so much love in my heart for her. i think the only rgu kids i actually actively dislike are ruka (still find him fascinating and compelling tho, he's a brilliant character and there is nuance to him. i also just despise him) and miki which is just a me thing. i am aware that it's funny i dont like miki for being a shit brother when i like touga, but you have to understand that my liking touga is complicated and he's only, like, my fourth favourite character when nanami is my second <3 love and light <3 also idk if ive ever said this anywhere but i genuinely love shiori and touga's relationship in aou, not because i think they're like? good together or whatever?? i think theyre both gay so you know whatever, i just find their interactions compelling and like. mannnn. it says so much about a character. the way that they both are around each other. very very interesting.

my final thing that i must assert as a shiori apologist is that she did nothing wrong <3 like if you didnt know that gay people were real and hated your own guts you too would be a java sparrow hurtling into a glass wall youre unable to see. episode 17 makes me feel like a wild animal. also yes i find juri more relatable and yes i think shiori's the more justified of the two, it's partially bc it's funny and also partially bc juri is mean to shiori!! she is!!!! she closes herself off emotionally and refuses even an ounce of vulnerability, for understandable reasons ofc, but then she gets SO MAD when shiori doesnt understand all her microexpressions and confess undying love to her about it. like be for serious juri. i really do love juriori with my whole heart and i think ive articulated why before in my dyke drama post about them. they just make me happy/agonised because i really do resonate in a way i never have with lesbian characters before. like i think juri's character in particular understands the nuances of being a lesbian in a way that just makes me, a lesbian, :)

#thank you for allowing me to ramble anon i hope this is of interest!! #i didnt wanna just like. talk about juriori in a way that would be rehashing other much better posts about them #so you get a ramble about fan reception and other crap <3 #anon #answered #rgu

[red-the-dragon-writes]

🚧 this is not finished and there will be adjustments! 🚧 please do not reblog this post! 🚧 

Hi, I'm Red. Welcome to my writing blog. I use he/him, they/them, ne/nem, and fuck/fucker pronouns, and this is a sideblog. I follow and interact from @bitegore. I'm bi, trans, aro, polyam and above all Queer.

I write primarily Transformers fanfiction and, rarely, original fiction as well. I like dragons and I like robots, and I will put one or the other (or sometimes both!) into everything I do. I consider myself to be a horror writer, and I typically try to lean in toward whatever shitty implications I can come up with rather than lean out.

I have a particular love of in-universe documents and pastiche of things like current event news articles and sociological papers. I also love gore, death, horrific power dynamics, and bad sex that hurts everyone involved. I love when characters do bad things to one another and I want them to be awful.

I fully intend for everyone reading my stories to get some sort of rubberneck-style voyeuristic fascination out of everything I write. My smut is bad and I hope it makes you want to peel your skin off. My humor is pitch black and I will rhyme lying with dying and try to make you laugh about it. I do my best never to shy away from the edge and I want you to stare down at the pitch-black hole I've dropped my characters into and acknowledge the abject depths of their suffering and then be forced to admit that actually that's kind of funny anyway.

But i promise i'm chill as, like, a person and I want to give you the tools to read or not read that at your leisure and all that.

Current Ongoing Wips:

Transmissions from Cybertron - a letter-based epistolary fic about a transformer who goes on a weird mission and gets his brain fried super duper hard by it. Currently in its last few stages, I think, I just have to get it DONE.

Fortress Maximus v. Big Sword Studios - a pastiche of the ongoing "censorship is good/censorship is bad" debate from the beginning of modern media's existence set on Cybertron and in regards to deliberately provocative politically-charged pornography about (in-universe) war crimes. About half done. I have to kick it into high gear and I don't feeeeelllll like it i want to write stupid shenanigans instead.

Dedication - my take on the Tarn and Pharma Have A Child thing, wherein everything is bad, Pharma is currently dead, and the kid has never had a single positive adult in his life thus far. and also hasn't got a name yet. i just need to finish what i have written so i can get to what i want to write. this one also only needs a couple more chapters and then it should be done. Also Transformers fanfiction.

"You really wanna know where I'm from?"  - my beloved transformers oc Bait lies about her background to a bunch of people for fun and profit. A personal project and on the back burner.

some speedy pilot sharpshooter, or something - same beloved transformers oc takes a hit out on one of my friend's favorites and gives him a complex via torture, but I lost the other guy's voice and so I haven't gotten back to it yet.

laser core - Vortex (a transformer) wants to kill someone by fucking their battery until they die so bad he blows his dick up like fifteen times. Stuck in progress because I don;'t know enough engineering to make it work.

Crystal Clear - A Star Wars/Transformers crossover where Megatron and Optimus Prime are ancient jedi and Sith dug up out of the ground. I have no idea wher I was going with this but I want to get back to it someday.

Closerverse Main Story - Original fiction; a two part story that starts with a fucked up child soldier/member of a military cult discovering that non-human people (this is one of those high fantasy worlds with like shapeshifters and shit who are very much people) are still people and killing them is bad. and then falling in love, or at least good friends, with a dragon shapeshifter who also rather likes her. and THEN we take a hard swerve into grimdark territory and do bad things to our beloved dragon shapeshifter and hit him with a curse and do bad things to our ex-child soldier and THEN they go ahead and burn down the old world order and build a kinder one in its ashes. This one needs a prety comprehensive re-plotting but the bones are good; but also there's some awkward eeehhhh shit about what is essentially me processing my hashtag jewish-in-2022 feelings through making shapeshifting lizards be an oppressed culture and people that I don't want to take out because I want to be a shapeshifting lizard so bad i could cry but also the antisemites. they do that too. im not with them

no other serious origfic stories at this time smh

Housekeeping:

Tags in Use: #tag game - tag games (where I'm tagged/pinged by username) #ask game - ask games (asks sent in that I respond to) #wip thread - a long "thead" where i post snippets from one particular wip, usually short fanfics I intend to wrap and post within that week #tf writing - tag to specify Transformers writing #cls writing - tag to specify Closerverse-universe writing (changed 3/25/22) #ff writing - tag to specify other (non-Transformers) fanfiction #origfic writing - tag to specify other (non-Closerverse) original writing #others' writing - tag to specify that someone else wrote this and i just think it's cool #advice - advice #aesthetic - pretty pictures, usually just to fill up space #cn: sexual violence - "content note: sexual violence" - umbrella category for rape, noncon and dubcon #cn: gore - "content note: gore" - for body horror and "extreme" violence #cn: self-harm - "content note: self-harm" - for written descriptions of self-harm, including slightly less traditional ones like starving oneself #cn: death - "content note: death" - for stories dealing in large part with death. Note: not ones where it's incidental or background- stories where major charcters die or deal with grief.

I don't have a taglist for any wips because I have very few serious ongoing projects. If you'd like to be tagged for discussion and workshopping of Transformers fics, or for original works, please let me know which. Transformers taglist: - General TF taglist: - - Transmissions from Cybertron: - - Dedication: - - Crystal Clear: - - General Bait (OC) fic: - Origfic taglist: - General Closerverse Origfic: - - Closerverse Main Story: - - General Non-CV Origfic: -

#writeblr intro #housekeeping #tags

[relaxxattack]

hi im asking u this bc u seem to be bee duo enthusiast so

ive been calling c! beeduos relationship platonic because i thought that was what their cc’s said, and i thought they had said that they were uncomfortable with ppl shipping the characters. But ive seen a lot of posts that say their relationship is canonically romantic? and i absolutely do not want to come across as homophobic by watering down a mlm relationship to just friends because that happens so much in media so.

what is the canon state of their relationship / ur opinions on the platonic thibg

dont worry abt answering if u dont want to!! i see a lot of differing opinions and i trust yours :)

aw it’s totally fine, im flattered you asked me about this!

let me put it simply: it’s a whole mess, lol.

first im going to talk about what’s happened fandom-wide that caused differing opinions, and then i’ll explain my own opinion/interpretation. :]

(this got really fucking long im so sorry)

ranboo and tubbo initially proclaimed the relationship was romantic, specifically in argument with the wiki editors who had set it as platonic by default. (you can see this in the vod where they decide they’re canonically married— it’s very funny. chat tells them the marriage is already on the wiki, they check, tubbo is jokingly offended that it says platonic and asks if he needs to up the romance).

tubbo also makes jokes about adultry, which sort of implies the relationship is not necessarily a platonic one.

(theres definetly more in that stream alone but it’s been a long time since i watched it so i don’t remember a lot of it.)

the wiki, because of this, suffers from going back and forth on platonic and romantic, seemingly unsure where the joke ends and the canon begins, or if its canonically a joke! a mess, as you can already tell.

this gets more complicated as the marriage bit goes on: outsiders, such as phil and scott, both at one point say “platonic marriage”, which then ranboo and tubbo agree with. however, when chat asks them if they’re platonic, they say the opposite. so there is a lot of confusion there.

there’s also the difficulty of being able to tell streamers and characters apart. ranboo and tubbo both don’t like being shipped irl, and that’s their boundaries that shouldn’t be crossed. (they’re also minors, but tbh when they’re 18 in a year i will still be following their boundaries regardless of their legal age).

due to people not wanting to be accused of minor shipping, they started adding the platonic tone indicator to most of their drawings— basically a way of saying “no homo”. meanwhile, tubbo frequently on stream flirts with ranboo and makes quite a bit of nsfw comments towards him that are frankly hilarious.

this goes on for a while with nobody really sure what’s canon, but a lot of people assuming it’s probably platonic, until: the drama of the mods night. a few mods dmed all the wiki editors telling them ranboo wanted his canon character relationship officially set to platonic.

unfortunately for those mods; the very same day, a few hours later, ranboo on stream makes fun of puffy delivering him and tubbo “friendship flowers”. because, and i quote, “bruh. we’re literally married. this must be how the ancient greeks felt.”

in case you don’t know, the internet often jokes about how historians will call ancient greeks ‘very good friends’ when they are quite obviously gay. so in this context, ranboo is joking that people will call him and c!tubbo, who are married, “close friends”, when he doesn’t think they are.

basically, ranboo canonized romantic bee duo, the very same day the mods told everyone he’d wanted a platonic one.

chaos and drama immediately erupted everywhere. on tumblr, we were talking about how weird it was of his mods to do something like that without asking him first. we ALSO talked about how weird it was of them to assume that ranboo can’t make his own decisions, or assume teenagers cannot be in relationships without it being sexual. twitter did the same thing but in the opposite direction: called ranboo mods homophobic, or said they were mad ranboo felt pressured into making a romantic relationship canon ‘just so people could have mlm rep.’

i dont want to go into detail about the drama that happened that night because apparently official people follow me and i dont want to stir it up or have them come “clarify” things. im just saying what we talked about.

ranboo in typical ranboo fashion apologized quickly and seriously. he was deeply sorry for possibly offending anyone with how he’d portrayed his rp relationship with tubbo, and he also assured everyone the mod thing was just a miscommunication.

he said he would talk to tubbo and they’d decide once and for all whether it was platonic or romantic, and then announce so everyone would know.

it’s now been a few months and we've had no word from them on that development. we still have no clue.

-

now, here’s my opinion:

i want to take ranboos word for it that it was a miscommunication with his mods, but... we had it on good authority from people on the wiki team and people in the discord with the mods that (while it was happening) they were really going after the wiki admins, and also made some weird comments about it. that combined with the way ranboo seemingly had no clue (considering he canonized their romance that very same day).... it’s very. sus of the mods.

then there’s the canon we’ve got since then. although occasionally adults in the room have called it a “platonic marriage” and tubbo once (back when it first started) called it a “plankton tectonic” marriage, in roleplay it’s been... kind of not that. tubbo and ranboo make nsfw jokes about each other in character, and their characters also share a master bedroom and bed in the mansion. there's also the way c!tommy really thinks it’s a romance between them as well, and they agree with and play off that— for instance confirming that they “fell in love” when he asked, or ranboo confirming that they “make out on occasion”.

people will still put platonic on their art and posts, imo, because they’re worried about breaking ranboo and tubbo’s irl boundaries by looking like they ship them. or even just being accused of shipping real life minors. and that’s a valid fear to have.

the thing is though: c!bee duo are not cc!bee duo. they’re roleplay characters. cc!bee duo are not okay with being shipped, but they made their characters get canonically married, and call each other “husbands”. so it’s okay to write the word “husband” in your comic without adding “platonic” to it, i promise.

telling the ccs that their characters have to be platonic is... weird. it comes off as not only babying them, but also as saying teens can’t date without it being gross. which isn’t true.

(this is why seeing people overuse “platonic husband” so much bothers me. like, they ARE husbands. you can just say it. what are you trying to hide...?)

-

do i think they’re canonically romantic? ehh, its likely. it’s still okay to interpret them as platonic, because again, it’s hard to tell where jokes end and roleplay begins. like, maybe it’s jokes in the rp too, and c!bee duo are just friends. friends can and should be allowed to make jokes like that with each other! aro & ace marriages exist!

or, maybe it’s actually part of the rp, and they’re very much romantic. we don’t know!

some people say they could be a qpr (queerplatonic romance), which i could see. (a qpr is a relationship that fluctuates between, or can’t quite be sorted into, “romantic” and “platonic”. people in a qpr can do romantic things while having platonic feelings for each other). in my opinion this is a very valid interpretation as well!

-

CONCLUSION (sorry this got so long omfg):

are c!bee duo romantic?

its likely, but you can still interpret them however you like!

should i put /p on bee duo content?

ehhh? i find it annoying when it’s overused (as do others), but if you’re worried you can. its up to preference. putting it too much is weird though

should i put /p on things cc! bee duo do?

no. you’re not the one saying it so you can’t decide the tone tags for that. imagine you said something to your friend and a random stranger came up and was like “haha but that was /p right...?”

can i ship c!bee duo?

mmm. i’m not sure on this one. they are canonically married and very flirtatious, but the ccs don’t like being shipped and they’re close enough to being the ccs that actively shipping might be against boundaries.

can i treat c!bee duo as romantic?

yes. literally just don’t be weird about it. it’s not that hard! you can understand that two characters are husbands without making it weird

here’s the most important thing: boundaries. cc bee duo still haven’t told us what their preferences and canon is about this whole thing.

right now, i am assuming based on what they already show us they’re comfortable with, but! the second they give us any more info! all these opinions will change!

i am only going off what they do. i would never want to cross boundaries at all. i just wish they would make theirs a little more clear.

..... i hope that helped anon, i went way off the rails... i need to go to sleep.

#it’s late im so sorry for how much i rambled and wrote #i hope this helps you #bee duo #og post #there’s probably so many spelling errors i need to go to bed #i tried to fix some spelling so reblog this one ig #and not the old one

[wolf-queer-discourse]

Adventures in Aphobia #3

My last two Adventures in Aphobia both took on similar flavors of eye-rolling at shameless, obvious bigotry to anyone willing to look or care. But today, I found a different type of aphobia, and I’m actually eager to talk about this one. Have a read of this first.

Look, the bar of respect for ace people is so low it’s all the way in hell, but I mean, to many people, especially allosexual people, they may look at this post and think, “No, this isn’t aphobia. The poster wasn’t blatantly cruel.” But what some fail to realize is that politeness can be the thinnest of veils over the ugliest of takes. Polite bigotry gaslights the victims into thinking they can’t be upset about this.

So what’s the deal with this post?

PARAGRAPH #1 starts off innocently enough, saying ace discourse wouldn’t exist if people recognized complex relationships to sex and relationships. Even taken on its own, I do not agree with this. Ace discourse ranges all the way from outright denial of asexual existence to the strong hatred for and exclusion of aces from the queer community. Nearly everyone recognizes people have complex relationships to sex...that...that doesn’t mean ace people won’t be discriminated against. In fact, it’s an argument aphobes use constantly to try and gaslight ace people into erasing themselves. Ace discourse comes from a lot of places, but at the end of the day, it all stems from people’s refusal to acknowledge ace people and their unique experiences. This poster absolutely does not get to say “IT’s CoMpLicAteD”, and expect ace people to just disappear. Honestly, it’d be better and more honest if they said “Lol, ace people should go fuck themselves and hop to the back of the line with everyone else.”

PARAGRAPH #2 and #3 are not very objectionable on their own. Everything said is true. Society has very complicated views on sex, and life happens to all people. The ugly part of this is that the poster is setting up an argument here in which they will hand wave ace people into the “everyone else” crowd and pretend as if we’re all just too similar and no labels should even exist.

This is literally what enby-phobes do. They say “Well, gender is COMPLICATED”, which is true, but then they say “So like...aren’t we all really nonbinary when we think about it? Why should enby people label themselves?” I swear we’ve all seen this. The poster is agender. This argument could easily be whipped in their face. Different forms of bigotry can share very clear overlaps, and it’s very important to acknowledge where these arguments come from and why they exist. It exists as a way to shut people up. It happens to bi people too! Every day, people come out as bi and someone tells them “pff, everyone thinks girls are hot. I had a crush on my best friend once, that doesn’t mean I’m not straight! All people are like this!” Let’s call out this erasure where we see it. It’s not the same thing, and if anyone saying stuff like this truly believes what they’re saying, maybe they’re the ones who need to reevaluate their own identity.

PARAGRAPH #4 dips its ugly toes straight into blatant aphobia, having the gall to call ace and aro people “obsessed” with pretending their relationships with sex and romance are wholly unique and different. Nah, fuck right off with that bullshit. The poster even goes on to say ace people have created entire new social classes. Uh...WHAT? Is there some secret ace society with a caste system living in the shadows?? What is this person talking about?? I suppose you can’t be a true bigot unless you have some vague grievance to weakly hand-gesture at that you couldn’t prove given 20 years to do so. For the love of my sanity, just say you hate ace people! It’s okay! (I mean, not actually, but Jesus Christ does it save us all some time). They also say things like “somehow excluded from”. Replace asexual people with nonbinary people and take a joyride through this section, because the arguments are scarily similar. What would it take for this poster to acknowledge ace and aro people have their own experiences? Seriously, what? What holds you back from doing this?

It’s also funny to note the actual lack of substance to this argument. The poster is not giving any specific examples or even bringing up what being ace and aro mean. Yes, there is a pretty noticeable difference between feeling sexual attraction and not feeling sexual attraction. How many “allo” people do you know that say they’ve NEVER experienced this? Come on. The poster reduces asexuality and aromanticism down to allo people’s, in their own words, hyper-specific contexts where they don’t want sex or love. At least the poster admits any circumstance that allo people are comparable to ace people are extremely specific. But for real, are we hinging a whole argument on a few very specific examples of allo people having some similarity to ace people?

“Nothing about your relationship to sex or love makes you more or less LGBT. If you are gay and don’t want to have sex, ever, you are still gay. “

Mini strawman alert for the idea any ace person thinks you’re less gay if you’re also ace. And bonus points for an aphobe who refuses to use the definition of asexuality: not experiencing sexual attraction, and instead goes for “don’t want to have sex”. For the last. Fucking. Time. Not wanting to have sex and being asexual are NOT the same. Don’t make me pour gasoline in my eyes every time I see this.

After this, the poster goes on a tangent, which by the tone, seems to think it's very inspiring, and says no matter how you want to have sex (including only certain days of the week), you’re still straight! It’s so fucking condescending and gross to talk ace people out of their own identity like this.

“EVERY person who is heterosexual is different in how they perform or experience.”

Oh. My. GOD. THEY DIDN’T EVEN SAY STRAIGHT. THEY SAID HETEROSEXUAL. WUGGYUEGYUG. God help me. Can one be both bisexual and heterosexual? No…? Okay. So then. How is one both asexual AND heterosexual? What single brain cell in this poster’s head was responsible for this Chad of a sentence? I—

*deep breath* 

So. It’s interesting how the poster says “perform or experience it”. Asexuality is an identity. It is not a performance, and it is not defined by your actions. A straight person not having sex does not become asexual. And sure...people with the same label can experience their sexuality differently, but...to a point, guys. You can’t experience your sexuality out of the DEFINITION of the label. Heterosexual: Sexual attraction to the opposite gender. Asexual: Sexual attraction to no one. If a “heterosexual” isn’t sexually attracted to anyone, they are by definition, not heterosexual. It takes insane mental gymnastics to make this argument, so A for flexibility, I guess? 

“Gayness, straightness, and bisexuality are not defined by HOW you do or don’t want sex or HOW you do or don’t want to date, it’s just defined by WHO you want to be with.”

The first part of the sentence is correct, but it also defeats this person’s entire argument. Ace people AGREE with this. Being asexual is not the act of not having sex!! It’s not experiencing sexual attraction! You can google this! The second part of the sentence is mostly correct, depending on your interpretation. The issue is in part with the words the poster used: gayness, straightness and bisexuality. These words are not all equivalents. Gay could refer to sexual and or romantic orientation. Thus an ace gay person. Straightness is not actually an equal word to gayness. This is because straight is an exclusive term for a normative sexuality (in society’s eyes) in terms of sexual and romantic attraction. Some ace people DO call themselves straight, though it’s inaccurate. Ace people can be heteroromantic, but because being straight is so exclusive, you need to be both sexually AND romantically attracted to only the opposite gender.

The post basically ends telling ace people they’re all actually straight and were just confused the whole time. Lovely. And an erasure of gay aces too! Believe it or not, gay ace people do not like having their ace identities erased. Who’d have guessed?

Honestly, if anything this post is just kind of sad. A sad reflection of what people believe and how they truly do not see their own bigotry. They believe they’re freeing ace people from an incorrect label. They’re the heroes.

They’ll say “it’s okay, you’re not asexual” as if they've like...lifted a burden off of ace people. Like, “Oh, you think I’m not asexual? Cool, cool. Glad you cleared that up for me!” It’s sad how aphobes think, some very genuinely, that asexuality is just some high school party that went off the rails, and we’re all just coming out of the drunken haze, ready to go home. Ready to all laugh about it later, tease one another about how wild and silly it all was. 

Having your identity erased like this is fucking horrible, and I hope people like this can take a look in the mirror and see themselves clearly. All ace and aro people have a right to their identity, whether gay, bi, heteroromantic or anything else. End of story.

#discourse #queer discourse #LGBT discourse #Adventures in Aphobia #ace discourse #asexual discourse #aphobia #ace #ace discrimination #asexual #asexuality #aromantic #aro #LGBT #queer #rant #why does this post think it's so intellegent #why did this post try so hard to sound nice at first #it's still aphobia

[raindancer2004]

The Elite Guard Bake Off

Word Count: 3,492 Demetri x reader One shot Warnings: Fluff, occassional use of swear words

I got the idea for this after watching the ‘The Great British Bake Off’ yesterday afternoon. Hope you like it...

Summary: It’s a quiet saturday afternoon in the castle, the Elite Guards have the weekend off and Demetri’s mate is bored. What happens when she decides to bring Bake Off to the castle...?

It was Saturday morning and to say Y/N was bored was an understatement. It was so quiet in the castle; it had been that way for three days. There had been no trials or dismemberments and even the guards were surprised as there’s always something going on. On the flip side they were glad it was quiet as it meant guard duty was easy and they had more time to themselves.

Demetri was enjoying the extra time with Y/N having been given the weekend off along with Felix and the twins following them being away for ten days on a mission dealing with and silencing a threat to their world.

Y/N was in the library with the four elite guards, all doing their own thing; Y/N was listening to Demetri read aloud, Felix was trying to solve a sudoku puzzle and the twins were comparing different copies of ‘Alice in Wonderland.’ Y/N let out a small sigh “What’s wrong mi amore?” Demetri asked looking down at her “I’m just a little bored, that’s all” Y/N replied, Demetri closed his book and adjusted her in his arms so he could see her better “I can’t have that. What would you like to do?”  Y/N thought for a moment, then an idea struck her “I’m popping out with Gianna quickly…” “Why?” Demetri cut her off, an eyebrow raised “I’ll explain when I get back. I promise” She replied “Be careful please” “I will. I love you” She kissed him before getting up off the sofa to go and find Gianna “Oh, I need the four of you to stay together” She called over her shoulder.

“Our little human is quite amusing” Felix mused; the twins hummed in response “I’m curious about what’s she up to” Alec wondered out loud “I think we all are brother” Jane replied, Felix and Demetri nodded.

Y/N found Gianna in her room “Hi Gianna, are you free for a few hours?” Y/N asked “Hi Y/N, yes I am why’s that?” “Well, I’m a little bored but have come up with an idea for something to do and I need your help” Gianna looked at her for a few moments before replying “What do you have in mind?” “I’ll tell you once we are no longer in the castle. Come on we need to go shopping for stuff” Y/N replied and gently pulled Gianna out of the room.

Y/N and Gianna went to the shop and bought some ingredients and some baking equipment “Are we going to buy them mixers?” Gianna asked “Nope, they’re vamps, they can mix the stuff by hand using a spoon. I think a mixer may just complicate things” Y/N replies “Good call Y/N” “This is going to be fun” Y/N said smiling, Gianna nodded “It’ll also be funny to watch too.” They also pick up an apron and have it personalised with a slogan, minus the name as they do not know who’ll win.

Gianna and Y/N arrived back at the castle and made their way to the kitchen to set things up. A set of ingredients were placed on each of the four tables in the kitchen along with an apron and baking equipment. “What are you girls up to this afternoon?” Marcus asks as he passes them in the corridor “We are setting the Elite Guards a baking challenge” Y/N replied low “Sounds interesting. Have fun” he replied and continued on his way.

They went to Gianna’s desk and quickly typed out a recipe and instructions, deliberating omitting the cooking times. They made four copies and laid them on the tables beside the aprons. Gianna stayed in the kitchens double checking everything was in place that was needed whilst Y/N went to the library to get Demetri, Felix and the twins.

Y/N entered the library and wrapped her arms around Demetri’s neck from behind and leaned in to nibble his ear before whispering “Miss me?” He chuckled low “Always darling.” “Have fun shopping? You weren’t gone long” Alec asked “I did have fun and Gianna and I were out just long enough to get what we needed. Please follow me to the kitchen and everything will be revealed” She smiled at them and held her hand out to Demetri. He stood and took her hand in his, intertwining their fingers and walked with her to the kitchen, Felix and the twins following.

“Hello Gianna” Demetri greeted her with a smile as they entered the kitchen “Hello Demetri” She replied smiling. “Ok, so first things first please go and stand behind a table each” Y/N instructed and watched as the four guards did as she asked. They murmured amongst themselves, wondering what was going on “You’re probably wondering why you’re here” Gianna spoke first and the guards nodded, a sign for her to continue “As it’s quiet today and Y/N was a little bored she came up with a fun way to pass the time” She stopped and looked to Y/N, who nodded “What’s your idea hunny?” Jane asked “My idea is Elite Guard Bake Off” She replied smiling “We can’t bake” Felix said pointing at himself and then the other three vampires “You can all read yes?” Y/N asked and they all nodded “Good, then you can bake” She replied smiling. Felix mumbled something so low Y/N and Gianna couldn’t hear it. “Speak for yourself” Alec replied equally as low.

Y/N ignored them and continued “You all have the same ingredients and the equipment needed to complete the task.” Demetri stood there smiling at Y/N, looking smug and feeling grateful his mate was human and loved to bake, for he had watched ‘The Great British Bake Off’ with her and has seen her bake cakes a few times. “What are we making then?” Alec asked, curiosity shining in his eyes “You are all making a Cherry Lattice Pie. You also need to make a Vanilla custard to go with the pie. You should note that we have removed the baking time of the pie. You will need to figure that part out yourselves…” “Like the technical challenges set by Paul and Prue” Demetri stated still smiling, cutting Y/N off “Exactly babe” Y/N replied nodding and noticed the confused expressions on Felix and the twin’s faces. “You have two hours to complete the challenge. Oh and Felix, this is not Mario Kart so there will be no sabotaging the others” He nodded “Ok” “Ready, set, bake” Gianna instructed them, both humans watched as the four vampires picked up their recipes and began to read them.

Y/N and Gianna sat and watched the vampires weigh out the ingredients and begin the process of making the pastry base. “The technical challenges are usually judged blind, darling” Demetri stated “I know but we want to see how you get on with the tasks…” “You mean laugh at us if we fuck this up” Felix stated “Precisely” Gianna smiled back, Felix growled “I have every faith in you Felix” She added.

Y/N was impressed when she saw how well Demetri was doing, he had made his pastry and put it in the fridge to chill and greased the pie tin in the meantime. He then prepared the cherries as per the recipe and set them to one side to start making the jam that would be mixed with the cherries later. A glance over at Felix’s table and it was clear he was struggling to make the pastry “Urrgghh I can’t do this” He growled “Yes you can Felix, just read the instructions again” Y/N advised.

Jane had made her pastry but did not chill it, instead choosing to leave it sitting at room temperature. Demetri laughed at this, as he knew it was best to chill pastry before rolling. ‘Thank you Bake Off’ he thought to himself. Alec on the other hand was covered in flour and was busy mixing the ingredients together to make the pastry, his tongue poking out the side of his mouth in concentration. Y/N and Gianna found it funny to watch the guards complete the challenge with varying degrees of success.

“Demetri’s quite good at this baking stuff” Gianna whispered “I know, but then he has watched Bake Off with me and seen me bake cakes” She whispered low. Meanwhile, Demetri removed the pastry from the fridge and divided it in two. He rolled out the bigger portion of pastry quickly whilst being careful to not over work it, and placed it in the greased tin, gently pushing it into the sides. He then filled the pie, discarding the leftover juice at the bottom of the bowl of Cherries. He then rolled out the smaller portion of the pastry and cut into strips and began to weave the strips on top of the pie to create the lattice effect. He was the first one to put his pie in the oven and set a timer on his phone for one hour. He felt quite proud of himself and found it funny that Felix was struggling.

“You have one hour and fifteen minutes left” Y/N called out “Shit” Felix growled “The pastry keeps splitting” “Just patch it up, I did” Alec called out as he was filling his pie crust. Jane giggled at the mess that her brother and Felix had made. She finished her lattice pattern and put her pie in the oven, setting a timer on her phone for fifty-five minutes. “This is so much fun to watch” Gianna said smiling, Y/N nodded with a smile of her own.

Alec struggled with the lattice pattern and eventually gave up “I think it looks alright” He mumbled to himself and popped the pie into the oven “Timer forty-five minutes” He told his phone as his fingers were sticky from the cherry and jam mixture. Y/N was trying so hard not to laugh at him “To think he’s meant to be a dangerous predator” She whispered to Gianna “I know, he doesn’t look so scary now he’s covered in flour and jam” She whispered back, and they started laughing. The vampires all look up the giggling humans “See I told you, they’re taking the piss” Felix huffed “Oh leave them be, it probably is a little funny to them considering what we’re doing” Jane told him.

Felix was the last one to get his pie in the oven, the lattice pattern non-existent on his pie. “How long we got left?” Felix asks “About forty minutes” Y/N responded “That’ll do time wise for the pie. Now to make custard, whatever that is” He begins reading the instructions to make the Vanilla custard.

Aro appeared at the kitchen door “Marcus told me of your plans for the afternoon and I just had to see it for myself” He tried not to laugh at the scene in front him. “I trust you are all having fun?” “We are Aro, not sure about them” Y/N replied gesturing to the guards “I think you’re supposed to put that white stuff in the bowl Alec not wear it” Aro said teasingly and walked away laughing.

Demetri finished making his Vanilla custard and set it to one side and began cleaning the table he had used as his workstation. “How come you’re finished D?” Felix asked sounding irritated “I’m just better than you” Demetri replied smirking at his friend, Felix hissed at him “I also followed the instructions given, it’s not hard” He added smugly before turning to face the sink, Felix tossed a spoon at Demetri “Oi! Don’t be a dick” Demetri responded, rubbing the back of his neck “Are you alright babe?” Y/N asked “I’m fine darling, the spoon not so much” He replied, glaring at Felix.

Jane finished second and set her custard to one side too and began to clear up. “I think the custard has gone wrong” Alec said aloud, Jane appeared behind him and looked over his shoulder “It’ll be fine, just keep stirring it” She replied “Really?” “Yes, Alec really. Keep stirring until it becomes smooth like the recipe says” He nodded “Thank you Jane.”

“Here you go darling, Gianna” Demetri said as he handed them a cup of coffee each “Thanks babe” “Thank you Demetri” They replied. “You trying to bribe the judges?” Felix asked “No Fe, I’m not. I have some time to spare and thought I’d make them a drink seeing as I’m nearer the kettle than they are” He replied “Suck up” Felix growled and Jane rolled her eyes “How about you pick up the pace big guy. I mean you’re currently in last position again” Jane said smiling “Bite me” Felix growled “Nah, I’m alright, I don’t know where you’ve been” She retorted, Demetri and Alec laughing at their exchange.

Alec poured his custard into a jug and began to tidy up. “I hate baking. Stupid human thing” Felix grumbled “Oi, my mate’s a human and she isn’t stupid” Demetri said slapping the back of Felix’s head “Gianna isn’t stupid either” Jane added “Really? Well whose stupid idea was it to get us to bake? It certainly weren’t mine” Felix said as he looked at Y/N frowning, Demetri moved to stand between Felix and his mate “Look at her like that again and you’ll regret it Felix” Demetri growled his friend’s name “Come on Felix it’s just a bit a fun” Alec said as he licked his fingers and then scrunched his nose when he realised what he’d done. Gianna laughed “You alright Alec?” “Will be once I wash my hands.”

Felix finally finished his attempt at custard and very noisily began clearing away the mess he’d made. Demetri’s phone timer went off and he carefully removed his pie from the oven and put it on the table to cool down. He sat back down to wait for the others to finish.

“You have ten minutes left” Gianna called out. Demetri warmed the custard back up gently in the microwave and got some cutlery from the drawer for Y/N and Gianna. Jane eyed Demetri as she realised that he was her competition and although she had never cooked or baked before, something inside her told her she couldn’t lose to him. Once Demetri removed his custard from the microwave Jane popped hers inside to warm it through. “What are you doing sister?” “What’s it look like I’m doing?” Jane sounded a little snarky, Alec looked taken aback whilst Demetri bit his lip to stop himself from chuckling “If I knew, I wouldn’t have asked would I, genius” Alec retorted, Demetri laughed, he’d never heard the twins talk like this to one another and it was rather amusing to him “Now, now you two. Play nice” “Get bent” Alec huffed at him.

“Five minutes” Y/N told them. “What happens once the time runs out?” Felix asked “We get to try the pies and custard you all made…” “That’s it?” Felix asked cutting Gianna off “No, we decide on who’s pie and custard is the best and the winner gets a prize” Y/N replied. “Noone said anything about a prize” Alec pointed out “It’s a competition Einstein, what did you think would happen? Jane asked, Alec hissed at her and Demetri chuckled, realising Y/N’s sarcasm had clearly rubbed off on Jane. “She’s like the Queen of snark” Gianna mused “I know, it’s weird that’s it’s aimed at Alec right?” Y/N replied.

Jane’s timer went off and she removed the pie from the oven and set it down on her table alongside the custard. Alec’s timer went off next and he placed his pie on the table and noticed the juice from the pie had bubbled down the sides, so the pastry was purple in places.

“Time’s up” Y/N called out just as Felix’s timer went off. Felix removed his pie from the oven and placed it beside the jug of custard on his table “Thank the Gods” He sighed “Someone got out the coffin the wrong side this morning” Y/N said looking at him, Demetri was doubled over laughing as were the twins. “I don’t sleep in a coffin” He replied, “You don’t sleep at all, dumbass” Jane added.

Y/N and Gianna made their way over to Jane’s table first and tried her pie and custard “Nice lattice work on the top. The pie looks even in colour” Y/N told her as Gianna cut two slices of pie and poured some custard into the bowl. “The pie tastes nice, the pastry is just about done” Gianna told Jane and she smiled “Thank you” “I agree with Gianna, a few more minutes in the oven and the pastry would have been perfect, that said the pie tastes nice and the custard is good too” Y/N added “Thanks” Jane replied with a smile.

They tried Demetri’s next. “The pie is cooked really well, pastry’s nice colour and well done on the lattice work. It tastes really really good. You can really taste the Vanilla in the custard” Y/N said before taking a second bite of the pie “Oh my god. That’s amazing Demetri” Gianna praised, Demetri puffed his chest out with pride and flashed them a big smile “Thanks girls.” “Teacher’s pet” Felix coughed out; Demetri ignored him.

They tried Alec’s attempt next “There’s too much sauce in the pie, hence the overflow and it needed about another fifteen minutes in the oven. The custard tastes alright though” Gianna told him softly, worried about his reaction “Please don’t hate me” She added quietly. “Gianna’s right another fifteen minutes and the pie would have been completely cooked through. The cherry and jam mixture is really good. The custard tastes good” Y/N said and gave him a small smile.

Lastly they tried Felix’s pie. “Wow, your pie has a soggy bottom…” Felix huffed and Alec laughed “Felix has a soggy bottom” Jane and Demetri rolled their eyes “They’re like children” Jane muttered. “The pie isn’t completely cooked as it needed another 20 minutes in the oven. Wow, your custard is really lumpy” Y/N told him. Gianna tried the pie and custard and struggled to hide her reaction “The custard doesn’t taste very nice and it’s lumpy. Also there’s too much sauce in the pie” Gianna added and Felix growled at her. “Oi! Behave” Demetri said, standing up “They’re just being honest Felix” Jane added “Yeah, but…I already said I couldn’t bake so I don’t need them telling me I’m shit at it” Felix replied pointing at Y/N and Gianna “Lighten up Felix, my attempt isn’t much better than yours and you don’t see me throwing a tantrum” Alec added, coming to stand beside Gianna.

Y/N and Gianna both agreed it was a tie between Jane and Demetri and ate some more of their pies “Why are they eating more of theirs?” Felix asked sounding disgruntled “They’re probably trying to decide whose is better” Alec replied. “We have made a decision” Y/N told them “May the best vamp win” Alec said looking between Jane and Demetri “I will” Jane said confidently “We’ll see” Demetri added.

“Y/N why don’t you get the prize ready” “Oh yeah, hang on” She replies and pulls out a grey apron with the slogan ‘I’m the castle’s best baker” in white writing and turns around showing it to the four guards “All this effort for that. Not bloody worth it if you ask me” Felix snorted “Don’t be a sore loser Felix” Y/N said, not bothering to look at him.

“The winner is…..Demetri” Gianna says smiling “Yes” Demetri calls out “It was really close, honestly” Y/N said looking at Jane. “It’s ok sweetie. I’ll beat him next time” She replied, nodding at the tracker “I look forward to the challenge” Demetri responded. “Seriously though, congratulations Dem” Jane said holding out her hand to him “Thank you Jane and well done, your pie does look really good” He replied shaking her hand.

Y/N put the apron over Demetri’s head and pulled him down for a kiss “Well done handsome” “Thanks beautiful” He replied and kissed her again. “Would I have gotten a kiss if I’d won?” Jane asked looking at Y/N and Demetri, her tone teasing “Maybe” Gianna smiled and gave her a playful wink. If Jane could have blushed, she would have “Ha. She got you good” Alec said laughing at Jane’s reaction. “Thank you for an entertaining afternoon, we’ll have to do it again sometime” Gianna said as she picked up Jane’s pie and custard “If noone minds, I’ll be taking this and going to watch a movie in my room” Gianna said and then left the kitchen, Jane smiled. “A movie sounds good Dem, what do you think?” “Sounds like a plan” He replied and kissed her again. “Bring the pie and custard please” “Of course darling” He was smiling proudly knowing that his mate liked the pie and custard he had made and that his first baked creation won him a prize, even if it was only an apron.

#demetri volturi #felix volturi #alec volturi #jane volturi #aro volturi #caius volturi #marcus volturi #heidi volturi #demetri x reader #volturi #twlight #oneshot

[edelegs]

so I have a very specific interpretation of the Edelgard/Hubert dynamic that I don’t think is particularly common, but I feel is worth sharing. This is largely because some people end up diminishing the importance of this relationship when pairing each of them with other people. It’s disappointing because I personally prefer these external ships (namely Edeleth and Ferdibert, for reasons I will make clear) but often see either Edelgard or Hubert reduced to some jealous, cuckoled cockblock in them. Honestly, that’s just . . . boring. 

(Long post under the cut)

TLDR: Edelbert is fascinating because it can be argued that Hubert’s feelings are born from guilt and shame rather than romantic love. This dynamic is unhealthy but deeply interesting, and it deserves to not be diminished in fan interpretations of these characters. 

Something that makes Edelgard so compelling is the fact that she’s full of contradictions. She can’t stand people/creatures with more power than humanly possible, yet she must use her own superhuman power and cooperate with what she despises to achieve her end goal. More specific to Edelbert, this end goal is equality, yet Edelgard is not allowed to be equal to anyone. She is a detached, untouchable princess who needs to learn how to meet her friends where they stand. It is through her connection to Byleth and to the other Black Eagles where she learns how to adapt her ideals to work in reality - and to be human. 

Unintentionally, Hubert does the opposite of this. His devotion to Edelgard began as an inherited role and evolved into something he does out of personal conviction. Either way, he is putting her on a pedestal and addressing her as a vassal rather than as a friend. Many of his supports with others involve him comparing them to Edelgard and telling them they’ll never reach her level. He takes it as his personal mission to protect her from those “unworthy” of talking to her. I don’t think this is intended to be selfish or malicious. I think that because of his role as her vassal and his failure to protect her from the Hresvelg experiments, he takes on this absolute devotion and prescribes it upon everyone else. 

Their relationship is unbalanced as a result. Edelgard makes constant reference to “fighting alone” and being prepared to end up isolated and maligned. The line “the solitary reign of Edelgard has come to an end” in her S-support is particularly telling. While she clearly views Hubert as someone important to her, she does not seem to view him as someone she can be fully open with. Hubert’s constant addressing of her as “Lady Edelgard” implies that he would not take the opportunity to call her “El” if it was presented to him. Edelgard and Hubert are both so caught up in the weight and scope of their revolution that they begin to enable each other’s bad tendencies. Hubert doesn’t dare challenge her, because he thinks of her as untouchable, and this devotion allows Edelgard to take him for granted. It is not a healthy relationship. I don’t think this is a particularly hot take. Their external supports are crucial for shifting these patterns of thought and allowing these characters to grow. 

What I think may be unpopular is this: I don’t think Hubert’s feelings for Edelgard are actually romantic. 

(For context, I am aro and just really hate m/f friends getting shoved together romantically. It may be easy to dismiss my thoughts as just me being bitter that we can’t have a m/f friend pair without one of them catching feelings but allow me to argue my point.) 

Hubert was assigned to Edelgard at a young age and told it was his house’s sacred duty to serve the Hresvelg family. He loathes his father for his involvement in the Insurrection of the Seven, which happened when he was ten. It goes without saying that this largely shapes his devotion to Edelgard. I would even say these events traumatized him to some degree. He mentions this in their A support, where he declares that his loyalty has been to her alone since she returned from the Kingdom. The path that these two share is informed and shaped by trauma - what Edelgard went through and Hubert’s powerlessness to stop it. More critically, these events radicalized them both and created the “shared vision” mentioned in his B support with Dorothea. 

That particular support jumps out to me. When I first played the game, I felt unbelievably validated by it. Hubert denies accusations of unrequited love in an edgily self-aware way (the line ”do I really look like the kind of drooling simpleton to have that kind of motivation?” made me literally cheer) and goes on to describe their relationship as walking the same path. He then highlights the qualities he feels towards Edelgard (gratitude, respect, awe, empathy, trust, and hope). None of these require romantic attraction. Dorothea then goes on to say that “loving another is really about wanting to be loved . . . I’m pretty sure that’s different from how things are with you and Edie”. This scene spoke a lot to my own experiences - my feelings for my best friend largely echo Hubert’s (though way less dramatic, of course) and I found the form of deep platonic love I feel for her reflected in that conversation. The acknowledgement on Dorothea’s part that it was different from romantic love (whether or not she truly believes it) is what blew me away. This is honestly one of the few times where a piece of media made me feel seen which makes me forever mad about the Edelbert A support.Though it could be argued that he’s just closed-off and could easily pull off lying about it, I know those feelings well. Others might see this as definitive proof of Hubert’s unrequited love for Edelgard, but I just can’t and I wanted to articulate this perspective because it means so much to me. Close, all-consuming, and important relationships can be platonic. 

I know better than to claim that the confession scene never happened. It is interesting to evaluate because it shows Edelgard finally calling attention to Hubert’s unknowing perpetuation of the gap between them. When Hubert states his feelings plainly, he is as composed as ever. Edelgard blushes and states that “you never cease to surprise me”. Hubert laughs this off, and that’s the end of that. It clearly is supposed to be a genuine love confession, but I think it’s more interesting to consider a man with only one real close friend misinterpreting his blind devotion towards her as love because he doesn’t really know what it is. I think it adds to the kind of fucked-up nature of their relationship (is it love or obsession? How is he supposed to know if a connection borne from trauma stems from love or guilt?). It also speaks to how difficult it is to identify romantic feelings when you’ve never truly felt them. 

That being said, I actually do ship Hubert with other people. I love Ferdibert because their personality clashes create a sense of mutual growth that helps Hubert learn to openly challenge Edelgard rather than subvert orders he disagrees with and it’s honestly just really funny. I also love Hubernie because the idea of a terrifying man and a girl who’s scared of everything learning to meet each other halfway shows similar character growth. I just think that for many years, Hubert’s devotion to Edelgard gave him a really fucked up understanding of human relationships, both romantic and platonic. There’s a tendency to erase the weight and importance of the Edelbert dynamic when both are shipped with other people as well as a great opportunity to show that strong platonic relationships can and should be perceived as equal to romantic ones. I have read so many Ferdibert things that suggest that their love is all-encompassing and Makes Them Whole. Wouldn’t it be more in-character to explore how they navigate the web of relationships in their lives? I love the Black Eagles’ interpersonal relationships so much and each one shapes the characters more and more. I’d love to see that reflected in ways that center platonic relationships! 

#long post #hubert is a demiromantic bi king and we stan #fe3h #hubert von vestra #edelgard von hresvelg #ferdibert #edeleth #character analysis #black eagles

[chibinekochan]

Loving you- ft Asmo

Asmo with an asexual reader

They are not aromantic. 

So everything goes except doing the do. 

They aren't sex-repulsed either but it's a super rare occasion option for them. 

If I got anything wrong I gladly fix it. I'm not ace or aro. Maybe a bit demisexual but that's neither here nor there. 

Gender-neutral reader insert.

  Words 2k

Falling for you was certainly something new. Completely unexpected. 

Of course, Asmo has his fair share of crushes and romances. 

Love on the other hand? Well, he thought that he experienced love. At least until he met you. Until he fell for you. 

He didn't see it coming at all. All it needed was a little human with empathy, just the right amount of flirting and care. 

Asmo can only chuckle about how fast and hard you made him fall for you. 

Even now, where he is about to confess his feelings for you, he is uncharacteristically nervous. Some might even say insecure.

  Asmo can only shake his head at himself. 

Finally, you knock on his door, much like a little boy. He nervously opens the door.

  You probably would never even be able to tell how much his heart is beating for you. "Welcome to my humble room. Please come in and feel all at home." Asmo looks at you with a wide smile, practically beaming at you. 

"Thank you Asmo. You look great today by the way." You smile at him, admiring his new outfit. 

Asmo smiles at you. "Thank you very much. I see you wear the outfit we got together last time we went out." His heart fills with a great sense of pride. 

Your cheeks grow a bit hot. "I dressed it thinking it would make you happy." It's very cute to him how you can act so shy sometimes. 

"It really does." Asmo closes his door behind you. You don't know how truly happy he is seeing you in this outfit. Especially since it's only the two of you today. "Sit wherever you want."

Asmo knows you like to sit in random places, depending on your mood.

  "I see you redecorated, it looks very nice. I love the fairy lights." You admire the small changes in his room. 

"I'm glad you like it. I did it thinking of you. When Satan was here the other day he didn't even notice. Can you believe that?" Asmo shakes his head.

"That's very sweet of you and I guess Satan just has not the eye for such things." You shrug and find yourself sitting on Asmos bed. 

It's pretty comfortable.

"Oh, I got some new products we just have to try today." Asmo spots the small basket of things he put aside to try with you. It's funny how many of these he collects. Within days the basket is always filled. 

Asmo brings the basket over. With great interest, you look at the products. "Wow, I can't even recognize any of these brands. How did you even find these?" Your eyes sparkle when you see the unfamiliar items with funny demon names. 

"Hehe, that's a secret but it wasn't easy. Now the question is what should we use first?" Asmo somehow always finds himself thinking more and more about what kind of products would boost your natural beauty or health. 

Funny how being in love changed his way of thinking completely. 

You look at the items."I don't even know where to start. They all sound interesting. Like this bath bomb that is supposed to smell like a strawberry field and makes your skin smooth." 

Asmo nods in agreement. "I agree. There are face masks too. They are made from mineral earth only found in volcanoes in the devildom. They will make any demon look at least a thousand years younger. Not that we need that, but it's supposedly best to revitalize your skin." Asmo proudly shows you the package. 

"I wonder if that works for humans too but it sounds great. You know I had this bit of dry skin on my arm the other day. Do you have anything for that?" You always happily ask Asmo for advice. 

"Of course. I got a great moisturizer just the other day. Let me get it for you." Asmo is glad he picked it up. He grabs the bottle for you and sits down right next to you. 

"I will apply it for you if you don't mind." Asmo uses every chance he can to be physically closer to you. 

"Sure, go right ahead." You completely trust Asmo, you don't see him as just a friend but you know how important sex is for him. So you have never broached the topic of a relationship with him. Being mostly content with being just friends. Even when it hurts.

  Asmo rolls up your sleeve up and sees a small spot of dry skin on your upper arm. "Looks like someone has not applied an equal amount of moisturizer everywhere." He playfully scolds you and then uses some of the moisturizer on your arm. He slowly and carefully applies the cream to your skin. He enjoys having physical contact with you. Getting lost in the sensation of being so close to you. It's somehow very intimate, despite it being just applying the cream. 

You notice that Asmo is slowly but surely using the moisturizer on your entire arm. His touch feels very good but it also makes you a bit nervous. 

You tried and failed before coming out as asexual to Asmo. It scares you, knowing how much he loves doing sexual acts. You don't want Asmo to judge you or make fun of your feelings. Mainly you fear that he won't understand you or even worse that he will take a huge step back from you. 

It's pretty clear to you that Asmo is sexually interested in you. He has asked you to sleep with him before. Asmo is always alright when you decline. He honestly doesn't seem to mind and isn't pushy about it at all either.

  "Asmo there is something I want to tell you." At this moment the words start to pour out of your mind. It's unfair not to tell him. He is very important to you as a friend and as someone you have a crush on. 

Asmo crocks his head. He wonders what you might want to say, you seem to be rather nervous. Could it possibly be that you might like him too? Asmo doubts that it's something like that, but he can always hope. Asmo braces himself for whatever it might be. "You know you can tell me everything." He is a bit wary of what you might want to confess.

"I hope this won't change anything between us but the truth is that I'm asexual." You feel great tension when you finally tell him. Asmo is surprised. 

He truly didn't expect this at all. "Wait so when you said no to sleeping with me that was because of that?" Somehow this is the first question on his mind. 

Your cheeks instantly heat up. "Yeah, I'm just not interested in that."

Asmo seems to just realize a few things. "So it wasn't because you weren't attracted to me?" He thought this was the actual reason why you weren't interested. Even when his own feelings were not changing. 

"You are certainly attractive to me. I mean we are flirting all the time after all." It's slightly embarrassing to admit but somehow it also feels nice to say it out loud. 

"That's true but I thought you were just being playful." Asmos head is racing with many different thoughts. "I have to confess something too and I hope this doesn't scare you away but I really really like you. I mean romantically." Asmo finally says what he wanted to tell you today. 

Now it's your turn to be surprised. "I had no idea. But with me being ace will a relationship between us even work out?" You feel happy but also afraid at the same time. 

'I've never had a purely romantic relationship before. I mean, you know me, I like doing these things. I like to flirt and I like the attention of others. I can't really pinpoint the reason why but with you it's different. Maybe it's because I have never felt this way before or it's because we are such close friends. I've never even been in a truly committed relationship before. All I know is that I want to be with you." Asmo seems open to it at least. 

"Even when I'm ace it doesn't mean we can't do many things together. I love to cuddle and I love all kinds of attention. I can still feel sexual attraction but it's extremely rare that I want to do it at all. If you think you can't live like this it's fine. I won't hold it against you. You are so important to me and I don't want to lose my best friend." You aren't sure how to say it right but your heart breaks by the thought of hurting Asmo. 

Asmo nods seemingly lost in thought. "I would never want to hurt you either." Suddenly he gently puts his hand on yours.

  You look at him with curious eyes. 

Then he gently looks you into your eyes. "Do you like me back?" 

"I do. I really like you." You say without a hint of doubt. 

Asmo smiles gently. "Do you want to be in a relationship with me?" 

"Yes but…" You start but Asmo interrupts you. 

"No buts about your sexuality." Asmo seems to know what you want to say. "Just answer yes or no."

You hesitate for a moment. "Yes." It surely will be difficult but it is also what you truly want. 

"Despite you knowing how I am?" Asmo can't seem to hold a giggle back. 

"Of course. I love even your bad sides." You smile at him teasingly. 

"Bad sides? I have no such thing." Asmo pouts playfully. 

You giggle. "Will you still be in relationships with other people?" This is an important question for you. 

'Honesty, I'm not sure if I will miss sleeping with someone. I never went without for a long time. I'm pretty content, just flirting for the most part. I mean, to be honest, I wasn't fooling around for a while now. I think you are to blame for that one." Asmo puts a lot of thought into his words.

  It makes you smile to see how much he truly cares about you. 

"I'm very sorry for making you fall for me." You giggle and act wounded. 

Asmo grins at you. "I forgive you."

"So does that mean you want to try a serious relationship with me? One where we cuddle, kiss, and maybe even hold hands?" Of course, there are many more things you can and will do together. 

"Holding hands? How scandalous!" Asmo laughs out loud. Then he takes your other hand and holds them both tightly. "It honestly sounds great to me. It won't be easy. We probably have to have some conversations about things. Maybe we will argue and make up. Maybe I will break your heart but maybe I will make you very happy. I have no guarantee that it will work out. Despite that, I want to be with you. I want to call you mine, and I want to be yours." Asmos words are very heartfelt. 

"Somehow this is crazy but it sounds pretty great to me." You can't help but smile at him. Even as friends you sometimes had some fights but always managed to come out stronger in the end. "I think we can make this work." 

"You are right, we can. How about a kiss now to celebrate?" Asmo is practically beaming. 

The atmosphere seems to be just right for this. "Yes." Suddenly you feel a bit nervous. It's not even your first kiss with Asmo. Your heart beats wildly.

  Asmo feels equally nervous. He doesn't even know why.

  He leans in, slightly parting his shaking lips. Your heart keeps beating faster, suddenly your lips feel strangely dry. 

Then your lips meet. Somehow the world suddenly feels right.

  It's natural and special at the same time. It lasts a few moments. A bit longer than a typical first kiss. 

When you lean in to kiss Asmo, your heads almost bump together. Causing both of you to chuckle. 

Asmo then hugs you. This also feels so right. Much more than either of you could ever expect. 

This first step into your relationship with Asmo is a good reflection of your future together. 

Sometimes you have a few bumps in the road, but there is also a lot of fun and love.

#obey me! #obey me fanfic #obey me asmo #obey me asmodeus #obey me reader insert #omswd #obey me one master to rule them all #obey me solmare #om!

[fruitquake]

realizations pt. 2

part one

read it on ao3

Regulus Black knows he doesn’t like girls. He wishes he did. It would make everything so much easier. But at some point, you have to accept that maybe you aren’t just a late bloomer. Maybe it isn’t just that you “haven’t found the right girl yet”. Maybe it’s just who you are.

Aside from knowing he definitely doesn’t like girls, though, it’s all very confusing. It seemed like a logical conclusion that if he doesn’t like girls, he must like boys.

But then, James Potter kissed him, and he’s pretty sure that if he were gay, it would’ve felt… special. Or it would’ve felt like anything at all. But rather, it felt exactly the same as kissing girls: uncomfortably and wetly smashing your mouths together. He didn’t say any of this to James. He didn’t say anything, actually, just left with what he knows was a terribly transparent excuse. Now, he’s in his room, sitting on the floor and staring out of the window at the few stars visible through the clouds.  

Is there something wrong with him? The question has been echoing in his mind since the kiss. Well, really, it’s been there long before, but he has managed to ignore it well enough before today. It was easy to push it to the back of his mind, and tell himself that he would figure it out eventually and it didn’t really matter.

But… He kissed James. James Potter, the guy who half the girls - and several guys - are utterly enamoured by. James Potter, who is objectively very handsome. And surely, if he were gay, kissing him would’ve felt… good? How is kissing supposed to feel? Regulus has tried it a few times by now, and it has never been the enjoyable experience that people make it out to be.

He is typing the words into google before he even registers having taken his phone out. Is kissing supposed to feel good?

Most of the search results are clinical, detached articles, explaining the biological and social reasons as to why humans like kissing. Until he stumbles upon a blog post on one of those ask-and-answer forums.

Anonymous: need advice!! my friends are constantly going on about their crushes and the people they’ve been with, how much they love kissing, all that stuff. and i just can’t relate at all. i’ve kissed a few boys, and once a girl too, and i don’t understand the hype at all? i’ve never really had a crush on anyone either, i think. all that kissing and dating and sex stuff just seem like a waste of time to me. is there something wrong with me? am i broken or something?

Regulus’s heart stutters as he reads the post through. He… relates to most of it. Is there something wrong with me? It’s the same question that’s been ringing loud and clear through his head since the kiss.

The comments are mostly stuff like “just wait til you’re older” and “you’ll get it when you meet the right person”, and Reg feels his stomach sink. Is that really it? He’s supposed to sit around and wait for “the right person” to come into his life and… fix him? He thinks about James again. James, who is kind and funny and one of his favourite people in the entire world. But kissing him didn’t feel right. It hasn’t felt right with anyone.

But then his eyes catch on another comment on the person’s post: you should look into the terms asexual and aromantic. i don’t think there’s anything wrong with you or that you are broken, but if you don’t have an interest in romance/sex it could be because you’re ace and/or aro.

Asexual and aromantic. Regulus googles both terms, spends hours reading through articles and blog posts and people sharing their experiences, and for the first time in his life he feels… seen. He hadn’t realized how lonely he felt, before discovering that he isn’t alone.

It’s a lot to take in. A lot of thoughts and questions and answers swirling in Regulus’s head. He really, really wants to talk to someone about all of this. But first of all, it’s 3 AM. Secondly, who?

James is… kinda the whole reason he’s having this sexuality crisis to begin with. He is certain he would’ve figured it out anyway at some point, but it’s thanks to James that he is up in the middle of the night, buried in research about his own identity. He doesn’t think he can talk to James about all this. At least not yet.

Then there’s Sirius. Regulus doesn’t know if he would understand. He feels some of that familiar loneliness creep up on him again. He and Sirius are finally close again. After years of division and hurt and pretending the other doesn’t exist, they have a relationship that’s actually good, and Regulus doesn’t want to ruin it. What if Sirius doesn’t understand or doesn’t accept him? He can’t lose his brother again. He doesn’t have anyone else.

Should he just… not tell anyone, then? Perhaps that is best, at least for now, he thinks. If no one knows, no one can judge him for it or tell him that it’s wrong or that his experiences aren’t real. He nods to himself, settling back into bed. It’s better if no one knows.

-

Regulus doesn’t get any sleep that night. Not that he really expected to. He spends the next day dozing off in class and avoiding James. Both are working out great for him until he starts awake, feeling a gentle hand on his shoulder.

He sits up straight on his chair and squints as he looks around. The classroom is empty, except for him and-

“Sorry, did I wake you?” James asks. He's standing beside Regulus’s desk, looking down at him with something like concern.

“S’fine,” Regulus mumbles, stifling a yawn.

James sits on top of the desk next to Regulus’s. “You look tired,” he says. “Are you okay?”

Regulus still doesn’t know how to react to people showing him genuine concern. It’s not something he’s really used to. “I’m fine,” he says, perhaps a bit too forcefully. He stands up, almost knocking over his chair in the process, and starts quickly packing up his things.

“Hey, uh,” James says, nervously messing up his hair in that way he does. “There’s something we should probably talk about.”

The kiss. Reg was desperately hoping James would pretend it never happened. He slings his bag over one shoulder and starts towards the door. “I’m sorta in a rush.”

James stands up. “Reg, please,” he says. “I… I really need to talk to you about it. Please.”

Regulus sighs, but stops in the doorway. “We don’t have to,” he says in an almost pleading tone, turning around to face James. “It doesn’t matter.”

“You don’t understand.” James looks at him with big doe eyes. “Reg, it matters to me.”

He regards James for a while, before nodding, signalling for him to say whatever it is he wants to say.

James takes a deep breath. “So, er… The thing about the kiss,” he begins, fidgeting nervously with the strap of his bag. “It sorta… made me realize something? About myself?”

Regulus has never seen him this nervous. He waits in silence for him to go on.

“Shit,” James mumbles, rubbing his face with his hands. “I feel like I’ve rehearsed this conversation all day, but now I just, like… Have no idea what to say.” He takes another deep breath. “Screw it, I’m just gonna say it, okay? I really fucking liked that kiss and I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it and also I’m bisexual.” It comes out as a quick string of words with no pause for James to breathe - or for Reg to interrupt him.

James looks at him; nervous, expectant, awaiting. But Regulus really doesn’t know what to say. He feels a tight knot in his stomach. “Oh,” he finally manages.

“Ah, shit,” James says frantically. “That’s right, there was something else I was gonna say, something important. I, er… I completely get it if you don’t feel the same way. I don’t want this to ruin our friendship, because I really care about you and I don’t wanna lose you. I just… really needed to get this off my chest.”

He sounds so genuine. Of course he does, Reg thinks and feels stupid. When has James ever been anything but genuine, honest and loyal? When has he ever judged Reg or turned his back on him for anything? James knows him better than he allows most people to, and if there’s anyone Reg can talk to about this, it’s him.

“There’s something I need to get off my chest too,” Regulus says quietly.

James’s eyes widen. “Oh? What is it?”

Reg sets down his bag and goes to sit by the desk opposite James. He doesn’t look at him as he starts talking. “I’m aroace. I don’t experience… that kind of attraction. Romantic or sexual. It’s… not exactly that the kiss made me realize it. Or maybe it did. But I kinda already knew. I just… wasn’t ready to admit it to myself, I suppose? Also I didn’t really know the word for it. But… yeah, that’s who I am and I can’t do anything to change that, just as you can’t change the fact that you’re bi, so… I hope you won’t hate me now.”

When James stays quiet, Regulus forces himself to look up. James is looking at him with an unreadable expression, and Reg’s stomach drops. This was a terrible idea. He should’ve known he couldn’t tell anyone. He has ruined everything. James opens his mouth but before he can say anything, Reg has pushed out his chair and is walking toward the door with swift steps.

“Nevermind,” he says, ignoring the stinging of tears in his eyes.

“Reg, wait!”

“Forget everything I just said.”

-

James finds him rather quickly, at the area behind the school that’s nearly hidden with shrubs. It’s where he comes when he needs to be alone, and he knows it’s also where Sirius comes to smoke.

Regulus is sitting on the ground with his back against a tree trunk, not caring if his clothes get dirty. James sits down about a meter away from him, but doesn’t speak, so Regulus is the one to break the silence:

“Are you upset because of my sexuality or because I don’t have feelings for you?” he asks. His voice is harsher than he meant it to be, but at least it’s not shaking.

James draws in a sharp breath, turning to face him. “I’m not upset at all!” he exclaims. “What on earth gave you that idea?”

He’s… not upset? Regulus clears his throat. “Well,” he mumbles. “You didn’t say anything.”

“I’m sorry,” James says earnestly. “I didn’t really know what to say. And you didn’t exactly give me a lot of time to think before you stormed off.”

Now Reg feels like he’s the one who should apologize. He doesn’t, though. Just stares straight ahead at the shrubs surrounding them.

“I’m really sorry I made you feel this way, Reg,” James says softly. “I promise I’m not upset. I care about you. A lot. And I, er… I may not know that much about this stuff, but I’m gonna do research on it so I can support you the best I can, because I care about-” He cuts himself off. “No, wait, I already said that part,” he mumbles, laughing nervously.

Reg smiles at him. “You hate doing research,” he says. “You avoid it like the plague.”

James laughs again. “Shut up, you wanker,” he says, shoving him gently. “This is different!”

He scoots a bit closer, putting his hand on Regulus’s shoulder. “But really,” he says, his tone more serious now. “I support you one hundred percent. You’ll always be family to me. So if you want, we can just forget all about that kiss.”

“But…” Reg looks up at him. “The kiss did mean something to you, didn’t it?”

James considers this for a moment. “I mean… it was a good kiss. And it did sorta… force me to come to terms with my sexuality. But what really means something to me is you, Reg, and our friendship. I don’t wanna lose that, ever. So… do I maybe have a teeny tiny crush on you? Yeah, I think I might, but it’s honestly no big deal. It won’t change anything between us, I promise.”

He holds out his pinky finger, and it takes Regulus several moments to realize what he’s doing. He holds up his own pinky and laces it with James’s.

“I just realized, I’m kind of an asshole,” he says after a bit. “I practically dismissed your coming out because I was so worried about my own.”

“Oh.” James chuckles. “Mate, don’t worry about it. I completely understand.”

“If you want, you can tell me again and I will try to react better,” Reg offers.

James shakes his head, amused. “I… alright,” he says, grinning. “Regulus?”

“Yes?”

“I’m bisexual.”

Reg smiles at him. “Oh, okay!” he says, acting as though it’s the first he’s hearing of this. “That’s lovely. I’m very happy for you. And… obviously, I support you, and I care about you a lot, too.”

James’s grin grows wider. “Thank you,” he says.

They sit quietly for a while, before James speaks again:

“Do you wanna come over today? Mum is making pancakes for dessert. And we can play Mario Kart.”

Regulus groans, but can’t quite suppress a smile. “Ugh, I don’t wanna play Mario Kart against you. You always win. I swear you’re cheating, somehow.”

“How would I cheat at Mario Kart?” James asks with a laugh.

Reg shrugs, crossing his arms. “I don’t know, but I don’t wanna play with you either way.”

“Okay, well… You can play against Sirius? Or you two can team up and try to beat me together,” James suggests, nudging his shoulder. “Come on, it’ll be fun. And pancakes.”

“Fine,” Reg says, as if he wasn’t going to say yes from the beginning. “But only because of the pancakes.”

James nods solemnly. “That’s fair,” he says, and Reg tries not to smile like an idiot, but it’s hard not to because at least for now, all of the worries and doubts swirling in his chest have been driven away by a warm, relieved feeling.

“James?” he says.

“Yeah?”

He doesn’t actually know what to say, so he just wraps his arms around James and pulls him into a hug. James hugs him back tightly, and Regulus feels incredibly lucky to have a friend like him.

#regulus black #james potter #marauders #marauders era #muggle au #modern au #fanfiction #marauders fanfic #marauders fanfiction #bisexual james potter #aroace regulus black

[dolokhoded]

TWO!!! THINGS !!!!! maybe three ill see as i go

1. im currently reading war and peace and i am Enjoing it and i love your blog you seem like a cool person with whom id enjoy being friends

2. for the chARACTER GAME if you're still doing that could you please do either andrej because i despise him (affectionate) or denisov because i love him ??

i hope you have the most beautiful day keep on being Cool and Amazing

also last thing as an aroace i LOVE your headcanons and i want to say that andrej is aroace as well methinks

farewELLLLL

1) that is so sweet of u ty you also seem real cool !!!!!!

(also aroace andrei methinks yes.........)

2) I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS ONE I HAVE SO MUCH IN MY HEAD ABOUT THEM LETS FUCKING GOOOOO ok let's do BOTH also this prob has 534967569 typos because i didn't spellcheck it because im lazy

andrei

Sexuality Headcanon: oh i never thought of it actually? i mean i ship him with women and men so def not straight lol. bi? bi. bi. on the aro spectrum definitely but not strictly aromantic.

Gender Headcanon: idk probably like,,, man. he seems like man. cis or trans idc he is man.

A ship I have with said character: andrasha his one redeeming trait (always keeping in mind i have mentally aged most women in the book by five years and aged down most men by five years) and then andrierre,,,,,, g ar b a g e. i love them.

A BROTP I have with said character: i guess i can say pierre although they were very clearly gay,,,, his relationship with marya is something i'd like to see more i like sibling dynamics and i got really hyped whenever they had like a Sibling Moment.

A NOTP I have with said character: andrei/lise i suppose, he just treated her like shit and she deserved better

A random headcanon: very touch starved. extremely so. will not initiate any physical contact himself because y'know he is Strong and Manly and thinks we're all stupid and worthless but if you touch his hair he will literally be at your mercy.

General Opinion over said character: bastard man fuckin IDIOT literally did not deserve a single good thing that happened to him. but also he's just like me fr. also i like to talk about this, but andrei was DEFINITELY a character written to die. from the moment he appeared in the story i was like yeah this bitch is dying. i genuinely think that he wouldn't be as good (and good i mean like well structured) of a character if he had lived. and then i also have a LOT to say about how SHIT his death was written but,,, anyways !

denisov

Sexuality Headcanon: idk. def likes men. maybe women too? definitely fruity that he never got married. idk i'm not good at,, labelling people as you may have noticed.

Gender Headcanon: NONBINARY VASKA DENISOV HAVE I NOT TALKED ENOUGH ABOUT THIS???? DO I NEED TO TALK ABOUT IT MORE BECAUSE I WILL !!!!!!!!

A ship I have with said character: denisov/nikolai,,,, denisov/nikolai. there is a bit of a power imbalance at the start i'm not gonna lie to you but i feel like it,, kind of evens out throughout the story.

A BROTP I have with said character: once again the denisov/dolokhov/nikolai friendship is a real fun one. denisov as petya's cool mentor was rlly cute as well "where WERE you i've been worried SICK omg petya". he's so funny.

A NOTP I have with said character: denisov/natasha i guess idk

A random headcanon: denisov definitely knows music. i don't know what he plays but he plays something. also a sad one lol, AND BOOK SPOILERS BC YOU MENTIONED YOU'RE CURRENTLY READING THE BOOK AND IDK WHERE YOU ARE EXACTLY THAT'S A PRETTY BIG SPOILER, when petya died he avoided nikolai and the rostovs for so long because he just felt so guilty that he couldn't keep him safe. at some point he found himself in the same place as nikolai and that's when it becamse really clear that he was avoiding him and nikolai was like ayo what the fuck, and they had a nice talk about it, and eventually it all went well.

General Opinion over said character: he is my FAVORITE he is the BEST i love him,,, so so much. such a good little guy.

#asks #andrei bolkonsky #vaska denisov #war and peace

[anki-of-beleriand]

And, okay, this is the second part and still don't know what am doing exactly but, hope you like it @aduialel thank you for the idea!

ThranduilxReader - sort of

GlorfindelxReader friendship

Modern Reader, mentions of Elrond and Celebrian

Here is the first part, if you wanna give it a chance

The wine is quite delicious; you are always quite surprise at how it slides down your tongue leaving behind a fruity taste. You are not used to this kind of beverages, but you have learnt to love them in the last couple of months you have been trapped in this strange, yet so familiar world.

Your companion says something and you have to shake your head to go back to the conversation. He looks highly amused by your distraction; you wince because you know he will tease you mercilessly once you have gone back to his place. You should have never said anything about this party, or the particular elf that have caught your attention.

“I think, my lady, that you are highly distracted.” Glorfindel says and you roll your eyes, then he places a hand on your shoulder and leans in whispering in your ear. “And the reason of your distraction is coming over.”

You tense because really one encounter was enough for a day. You can sense the tension on your shoulders, that empty pit on your abdomen and the fluttering of butterflies in your heart as he approaches. He is not alone, he comes with Elrond and another elf, his eyes are completely focused on you though his face seems to be a mask of pure indifference those eyes burn with emotion.

“Ah, Glorfindel, fancy seeing you here.” He says and Elrond shoots him an exasperate stare while Celebrian merely rolls her eyes.

Glorfindel arches a single eyebrow bowing his head, “Thranduil, it has been quite some time, how have you been?”

“I’ve been doing fantastic, though Elrond here was wondering quite a few things and we thought you and your companion can help us clarify.”

Now it is Elrond the only looking completely flabbergasted at this declaration, you hide your smile behind your goblet because this is really strange but funny at the same time. When you arrived in this strange world you never entertain the idea of getting to know the characters that have been filling your dreamless nights, or the stories you have been working on. You think briefly on all your WIPs back home and shake your head knowing they will forever be in that status.

Someone pokes you on the side and you notice you have been staring at Thranduil more than you should, and they have stop talking at some point. You can feel your cheeks warming up in embarrassment, but it is your eyes and your smile the ones that betray this.

“Right, I…wasn’t paying attention. What was it?” You try to sound sheepish and apologetic but Thranduil doesn’t seem to be impressed by this.

“Lord Thranduil was asking for your name.” Glorfindel sounds completely and utterly amused and you shoot him a stare that says you will kill him later. Or try to.

You turn to Thranduil who is waiting for an answer, Elrond and Celebrian both decide to not be part of this though they stay watching the interaction with growing amusement on their part. You smile politely an introduce yourself, the name that escapes your mouth is the one Glorfindel bestowed upon you on your first meeting when he saved you from a certain dead as soon as you arrived to Middle Earth.

Thranduil arches an eyebrow as if contemplating the veracity of what you just say, and as he does this you also take a closer look. He is ageless though there is something youthful in him, perhaps it is his clear eyes that show no pain nor any sadness or coldness, this is a time before Sauron breaks havoc so you know nothing beyond the Fall of Doriath has happened. He is still young, and perhaps happy. There is no wife as of yet, and he is vain and extrovert though right now, for some unknown reason, he looks highly offended though the conversation soon moves to different topics.

You can seem to stop your eyes from wandering back to Thranduil and he seems to be under the same kind of predicament. Though you can’t help but think his reasons are different to yours, your little crush really have you wanting nothing more that touch that silky hair of his or to see those eyes and that beautiful smile he seems to wear only behind a mask of sarcasm and arrogance.

“It seems you are easily distracted,” his voice is deep taint with amusement and his blue eyes gleam as they look down on you, “is my presence uncomfortable to you?”

You narrow your eyes, for the very first time noticing you two are alone. Glorfindel has been dragged away by Echtelion and Elrond is back on the dance floor with Celebrian. Your eyes go back to Thranduil who seems to wear a smirk and wait for an answer.

“No, of course not.” You answer trying to keep your cool, but really he is suddenly far too close to you. “But, I do get distract easily it’s just….I’m not used to all of this.”

You wave your hand around and Thranduil seems to contemplate you for a moment, he turns to the room and then his eyes are back on you.

“You mean celebrations? Or, elves in general?” He asks with a single eyebrow lift and you shift uncomfortable for a moment, no one knows you real origins. No one but Glorfindel and Echtelion, you are not overly excited to share it with anyone else because they don’t need to know.

You turn to Thranduil and your heart speeds up when his eyes settle on you, he really has such beautiful eyes. You shake your head and shrug.

“I’m not pretty good at social gatherings.”

“Whatever not?” Thranduil replies genuinely surprised. “They are the best to spend a tiresome day fill with routine.”

“I prefer to read, or just to hang around with my closest friends.” You want to tell him you also prefer to hear music or watch movies but…

Thranduil then tilts his head, “Friends? It was quite shocking to see Glorfindel it is such a friend, I did not know he mingle with mortals.”

You tense turning to Thranduil furrowing your brows, “why not?”

Thranduil seems genuinely surprise by the question, he gives you a quick glance pursing his lips.

“Why would one of the Eldar mingle with a mortal? It is but a brief blink of an eye to us, to create attachments seems foolish.” He says as if this was a universal law, his words hurt you deeply but they also infuriate you.

“What a stupid thing to say.”

“Excuse me?” He turns to you rather shocked that someone seems to say something like that to him.

“I said that’s a pretty stupid and ignorant thing to say.” You retort looking at him who was now lancing at you with narrow eyes. “Why would you deny yourself a friendship for such an stupid reason? You are not invincible, and you can also die by fading or sword, so you stop having friend or lovers because of it?”

“Lovers?” He says the word with a strange glint in his eyes, there is something you are missing in this conversation but now Thranduil is back with a fire in his eyes as he tries to intimidate you with his height and stare. “It takes too much effort to try and build a relationship with someone who is to die and whither with time, it simply has not sense.”

Your hand tightens around the cup of wine, your really are quite offended by those words mainly because in your head you though this conversation would go differently. Perhaps, you imagine yourself getting to know Thranduil and befriend him and maybe, just maybe, getting a kiss or two; really all the fanfics you read fill your head with impossible dreams. Now, he is just an arse, and you want to hit him for such harsh words.

“How petty of you, Lord Thranduil.” You said with all the animosity you could muster. “Either way, my friendship with Glorfindel is none of your business and thank the heavens you are not to decide this, nor I am interested in forging a friendship with someone like you.”

“Someone like me?” He looks downright offended, and now you are completely certain no one has spoken to him in such a manner.

“Yes! A complete brute, insensitive, idiot.” You take a deep breath shaking your head, “now, if you excuse me, I think my friend is calling for me.”

Thranduil is left alone, shocked and completely outrage at such treatment. No one and you really mean no one has ever dared to treat him in such a disrespectful way. He sets to follow you and you don’t realize it until his hand wraps around your arm turning you around mid-stride.

“Apologize.” He demands and you can help but laugh.

“Really? Whatever for?”

“Your rudeness for starters, you should not speak in such a disrespectful way to a lord.” He says as a way of explanation, you snort taking his hand in yours to disentangle it from your arm.

“Right, let’s get something straight, I don’t apologize to my mum, whatever makes you think I will apologize to you, lord or not?”

He seems annoyed; his eyebrows are knit together as if he is looking for an explanation. You purse your lips looking away before speaking.

“But don’t worry Lord Thranduil, you will not see this rude girl ever again, so you won’t have to deal with my rudeness anymore.”

“Why?” He asks and you stop death on your tracks.

“What?”

“Why I won’t see you anymore?” He asks surprising himself, his blue eyes glaze over for a moment before the settle on you with decision.

You gape, because that’s strange thing to ask but, then you shake your head and step back.

“Because, we won’t see each other again?” You kind of ask, kind of answer not really knowing what to say.

He seems to pounder over this straighten himself up, “And, why not?”

Again, he seems surprise at his own question and boldness, you are just confuse because, really? What the hell?

“Uh, you don’t deal well with me being honest?”

“Rude, you were being rude.”

“I was being honest, that it came out rude because I call you an idiot is of no consequence to me.” You reply stepping back a little. “And, we won’t see each other again, because I do no fancy having to see or talk with someone like you.”

“Someone like me?” He asks offended all over again, and this time around you look rather amused.

“Yes, someone like you.” You reply taking another step back, he seems to pierce you with his eyes before asking.

“What do you mean someone like me?” He asks and, just because you can and you’re still mad you answer.

“An idiot.”

He is left there with a strange expression on his face and, while you do not know it, he is already working on a way to see you again.

Only because it is Thranduil the one who should always have the last word.

#ThranduilxReader #first time doing this #be kind to me #writing #GlorfindelxReader

[miraculouscontent]

Askplosion #12 4/4:

(I would like to state for future reference that, while I do not mind long/multi-part asks, if you’d like to engage in actual discussion with me over a non-Miraculous topic, my DMs - Tumblr Messenger - should be open; I lost pieces of three multi-part asks this time just due to Tumblr not sending the remaining part(s) so yeah, I just wanted to make that clear)

(like, this askplosion ended up being super long because of this section and that’s not really what I want to have going on since I’m supposed to be a primarily Miraculous blog; I don’t want to have to stop answering non-Miraculous related asks but I might have to if this keeps up:)

.:New non-Miraculous Asks:.

Anonymous said:

What are your experiences with some really rude anons?

It’s partly my fault when it happens. Like I’ve said before, I’m an aspie, and part of what that means is I struggle to understand situations emotionally. I can come off as insensitive or read the mood wrong which often leads to people misunderstanding my intentions or where I’m coming from.

More often than not, what I’m saying will make 100% sense to me but not the person/people reading it. I also stick a lot more firmly to my opinions than I should because people tell me I fold too easily, and I come off as more egotistical than I actually am to cover up my low self-esteem lol.

So yeah, can’t think of any experience in particular but sometimes it might be my fault? At least I suspect that it is?

Anonymous said:

“Killed by kindness” makes me think of an assassin who kills people by giving hugs and compliments to people and the occasion gift that isn’t tampered until thre target does like Conrad Birdie making women swoon into fainting by singing.

omg

yes

Anonymous said:

You're watching Yashahime right now? rip

MARINETTE TAKE 2 MOROHA DESERVES BETTER

SETSUNA HAS SO LITTLE REASON TO HANG OUT WITH THE OTHER TWO GIRLS

IF I SEE ANOTHER DEUS EX TOWA I’M GONNA KICK SOMETHING

(so yes, I’m watching Yashahime)

Anonymous said:

Since someone recommended Remarried Empress, I would like to recommend my own webcomic: Princess Love-Pon! It's about a young girl named Lia Sagamore who becomes the titular magical girl and purifies people's hearts when they're tainted by the Dark Queen! It's really cool due to its diversity, the main character is black and her best friend is Afro-Latina, the villain and her prince son are also black, and there's a Japanese girl, a black guy, and an Indian girl. Plus, loads of pink and frills!

Thank you very much, though I actually don’t take recommendations, even from close friends. The Remarried Empress anon wasn’t a recommendation; they were more pointing something out to me and then I went to confirm.

Anonymous said:

Unrelated to MLB: Which Pokémon are your favourites?

I used a “Favorite Pokemon Picker” because I prefer going by generations to pick favorites and that was the easiest way of going about it. I struggle picking super favorites so here’s what I got form each generation! (my only rule was “one Pokemon per evolution line” with an exception of the Eevee line since they’re different types, and also Alolan/Galarian forms)

(note: the blue-patterned Vivillon is my favorite and I honestly don’t like Charizard normally but the Y version actually slims him down and gives him the wings I feel he should have; it’s an improvement of the design so it gets my seal of approval, I don’t like the X version at all)

(lol I was looking through this after I was done and find it really funny how it’s like, 50% cute things and then the other 50% is just EDGY, there’s very little in-between with me I guess)

Anonymous said:

Bridgerton the Series: Yay or nay? Sorry if you haven’t seen it or it’s not your thing. I was just curious.

Never seen it, though when I brought up to someone, they didn’t recommend it to me at all ahaha.

Anonymous said:

I previously kept having this argument about The Bechdel Test with someone. She keeps insisting that the test is invalid because there's nothing wrong with talking about men and that it was created for lesbians only, and not for feminists, with the implication that being a lesbian somehow means that you dislike men or want them gone. And she also thinks the test is about NEVER talking about men, rather than merely occasionally talking about other things. I keep telling her otherwise, but...

jdfhkgdfhjgdfg “lesbians only”

now all I can imagine is “lesbians only” sections at restaurants and such

Anonymous said:

Have you ever played Akinator, with or without the Miraculous Ladybug characters? Because I played it with Ochaco from MHA and Marinette and he guessed them within a second(can your character control gravity? Is your character a protagonist?). I even played it with myself as the "character" and he guessed "your shadow" lol. How about you?

I’ve played Akinator before but I don’t specifically remember what I was searching for lol.

Anonymous said:

The cast for the newest Power Rangers series got revealed, and I hate that as soon as I saw the Pink Ranger's bio mentioned she was an internet journalist, I thought of Alya. I really hope she doesn't have the same problems as Alya in the series proper.

fhgdfkgd journalists have been ruined for us forever

Anonymous said:

Have you noticed that in many shows, especially shonen shows, people tend to hate the most "feminine" female character? Like, in Naruto it was Sakura, in Death Note it was Misa, in My Hero Academia it was Ochaco(although a lot of people like her so I'm not so sure about that last one?). The most hated character in one too many a shonen is almost always the "girliest" of the characters. They're always claimed to be useless or reliant on a man. And this is within the fandom who should know better!

It probably didn’t help with Sakura that she was decked out in pink hair; that’s an instant girl label for you (or lesbian label, depends on the person :P).

I don’t think I’ve been in enough fandoms to have such an experience but I definitely see where you’re coming from.

Anonymous said:

Rewatching Chat Blanc and Here To Help from Star vs. and hearing Adrien/Marco tell Marinette/Star that they always liked the girls from the beginning makes me so pissed. It's not that I don't ship Starco(I do! But I also like MarcoxJanna), although I don't ship the love square, but I'm so annoyed with writers finding the need to make the audience "know" that the main ship's characters "always" liked each other, as if that makes their love for each other more true, even if it's obvious they had other crushes? Like, what happened to Kagami Tsurugi? Jackie-Lynn Thomas?

News flash: Teenagers are allowed to have crushes on multiple other people before they find "the One". It doesn't mean their love for that "One" is any less valid. And if you still want to pull the "they always liked each other since they first met", at least make it actually TRUE!!! Don't have them have crushes on other people before moving on to the "official" crush and be all like "Oh, by the way, I liked you from the start," when it's dead obvious they didn't. You're doing a disservice to the romantic "false" leads.

I'm willing to forgive Star's crush on Oskar and Tom since she's not the one claiming she always liked Marco(even though she fell in love with him LONG before he fell in love with her, which is a nice turn of events), although her "love" for Oskar was merely an infatuation at most and I personally don't see why it was needed. Why don't they just say that their old crush didn't do it for them???

UGH, I remember watching that show and being so annoyed because I really liked Marco and Jackie and wanted them to be a thing but I knew that they’d pull Starco in the end because of course they would.

It also totally makes it seem as if love is the most powerful relationship there is (aros would like a word), which is so bizarre when there are so many “power of friendship” tropes. Like, a male and female lead have to get together because their relationship is the strongest.

The love square would hold so much more meaning to me without this love drama nonsense. It’s tiring.

Anonymous said:

Have you seen Yuki Yuna Is a Hero? If so, then what are your thoughts on it? I was thinking of watching it but it seems to be another "taking away the empowerment of the magical girl genre by making the girls suffer instead" type story. I read about it on TV Tropes and apparently it's a deconstruction that takes after Madoka Magica which already puts a bad taste in my mouth, but then I got to the examples and they're basically about how girls who get magical powers lose their body parts one by one and that the reason only girls can be heroes is because "young girls have always been sacrifices".

Not to mention it was written by a man and aimed towards a seinen(adult men ages 17-35) demographic, making it torture porn for adult men. Also, both the laconic page for Yuki Yuna and Madoka Magica say "Being a magical girl sucks."(though for Yuki Yuna it adds "Unless you have the power of friendship.") and to be honest that kills any desire in me to watch the show. Should I give it a chance?

Oof.

Yeah, after bringing it up to a friend of mine, it was instantly recommended of me not to watch it, so I’d say, “no.”

Anonymous said:

Let's make one thing perfectly clear. I, love, love, LOVE Sailor Moon. And I love the transformations, too. But if there's one thing I don't love, it's that their outfits all look pretty much the same but with different colors/different lengths of gloves and shoes and stuff like that, and that they all have the exact same body type save for the one fat girl who's made to look bad. I don't like Madoka Magica, but at least they all had unique/different costumes(but they still have similar bodies).

We’re not allowed diversity here. Take your different body types to a show that cares; we’re all about femininity here and how girls can be beautiful and powerful no matter wha--oh wait...

Yeah, I don’t care for the design in Sailor Moon, but that’s because skirts don’t interest me design-wise unless it’s really unique/interesting.

(note that there’s a lot of talk about tomboys, sexism, and TV tropes and such below, and then Madoka Magica after that; that’s basically the rest of this askplosion:)

Anonymous said:

I just saw the thumbnail for a video called "Why You Should Watch Princess Tutu(Yes, I Know The Name Is Stupid)". Umm, why is it stupid exactly? Because it's "girly"? What is with people thinking that in order for a girly show to be good they have to first separate the show from its girliness in order to enjoy it? It's like how men will say a show is good despite it being girly, or that since it's good it's no longer girly. Nobody does this for boy shows, because boy things are "never" stupid.

Princess = girly thing

Tutu = girly thing

girly things = bad

That’s the formula~ They should’ve called it something edgier and manly so that more people would be interested.

Anonymous said:

I'm wary of any woman or girl who says, "I'm a girl, but I'd rather read books about guys" or "I'm a female writer but I mostly write stories about male characters". I feel like those women are the "not like other girls/one of the guys" type who suffer from internalized misogyny and don't like female characters. I also feel like they're the type to not care about female representation, because in their minds, girls shouldn't care about female role models. We can enjoy males just as much! I do!

To be fair, they might also just be writing about shirtless men doing “handsome” things. ;P

But nah, I see your point. Me personally, I try to find a balance of writing both, but I do think there can be bias.

Anonymous said:

Do you think it's okay to like a ship but acknowledge that it wouldn't be safe or healthy or condonable in real life? Because I was just thinking of how a lot of people like some really "toxic" ships like Veronica/JD in Heathers, Yuno/Yukki in Future Diary, Madoka/Homura in Madoka Magica(although some people don't like it because of its toxicity/like it but don't realize it's toxic), almost any villain/hero ship, the list goes on. But they're aware of the fact that it's not a good standard for healthy relationships in real life.

An alternative I've seen is people having a crush on "dangerous" characters like JD and Yuno, or Karma from Assassination Classroom(there's not a single video on YouTube with him in it that DOESN'T have comments full of people saying they want Karma to father their children), but still being aware of the fact that the character is a) not real and b) wouldn't be a good partner if they were real(and that's assuming they even want to be with you. But sometimes there's a good reason for falling in love with a "toxic/dangerous" character.

Take Monika from Doki Doki Literature Club! She's obsessed with the player(not the player CHARACTER, the flesh and blood player themselves) to the point of killing off all the other girls and "trapping" you in a room with her where she talks endlessly about lots of things. But she's actually a lonely girl who's driven insane by the fact that nothing around her is real. She latches on to you because you're the only other person who's real and sapient and has got a mind of their own. You're literally her outlet to the outside world.

She's personally my favorite character in the game due to her actually being a more fleshed out, sympathetic(and not in the idealized "moemoe" way), and realistic take on the Yandere archetype(which, like many moe archetypes, is kinda misogynistic in nature in that it reinforces submissiveness; it's basically animes version of "woman scorned".). So it makes sense that people would sympathize with her and want her to become real, because all she's ever wanted was to be real and to talk to real people. Especially since she really did care about her friends and even returned them back to life because she saved their backup files, taking herself out of the picture.

I read a few "Monika becomes real and lives with you" fanfictions where she's really sweet and not at all crazy and cares for you a lot, and it's never felt the same as all those other "Yandere/psycho lives with you and is your girl/boyfriend" type stories precisely because those stories tend to just glorify possessive partners that kill your loved ones, drive your family members to commit suicide, and tear up your stuffed animals and dollies for the sake of it, rather than go into why they're so crazy for you, and often reinforce Stockholm Syndrome.

Plus, those "things" she talks about in the empty room? They're actually quite smart and make you think about the world for a bit. Not many "crazy" type characters actually get that. They're all about how "I'll slice your boyfriend open with an axe if you don't date me wa ha ha", and even if they're not, it's all the fandom will focus on, to the point of ignoring any and all other aspects to their character. Because that "crazy in love" aspect is the most appealing part of them. Maybe it's due to forbidden fruit/bad boy(or girl) appeal? Who knows? But I'm starting to wonder if it's still as bad if people recognize the problematic aspects of "crazy in love" characters or "dysfunctional" relationships.

Because if they recognize it's not real and don't really want it for themselves, then it's probably not much of a problem. But if they just go on wanting it to be real and never take a step back and go "wait a minute, this isn't real love; they're only together because he latches onto the first girl to show him any kindness and affection and she's a doormat who doesn't want something bad to happen if she leaves him", then that's bad.

Obviously it's not as bad as being in love with literal stalkers, killers, and rapists in real life(which is an actual thing, believe it or not, it's called hybristophilia), because fictional characters will never be real. Karma Akabane will never be real. Yuno Gasai will never be real. JD will never be real. But loving fictional characters who do those things and not realizing the problem with it may cause people to seek out real criminals, so it's best to separate fiction from reality.

I can’t help judging a little internally, but yeah, I think people can ship whatever as long as it has that “not in real life” scenario going for it. It’s ultimately fiction, so just because I don’t like it and/or think that it’s bad doesn’t mean other people can’t ship it.

Anonymous said:

I'm getting tired of all the racists on TV Tropes getting upset whenever a trope has a Japanese name. Whether it's Tsundere, Yandere, Meganekko, Genki Girl, Bokukko, or any Japanese anime name, people will complain that the trope exists beyond anime so it shouldn't have a "cute anime name", and that it should instead just be given a broader(read: English) name with the same meaning. Or that the site is too obsessed with anime. I'm just sick of people saying that anime names are bad.

The other thing is that we don’t actually have English words for certain things? I mean, the whole reason we say, “tsundere,” is because it says everything in one word. It’s easy.

(Also, people are aware the the English language isn’t some unique thing that takes no inspiration from other languages, right? It’s a mix of things, so accept that other languages exist because we literally wouldn’t have English without them.)

Anonymous said:

Have you seen the TV Tropes reviews for "My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic"? Holy crap, they are all a perfect example of the "Real Women Don't Wear Dresses" phenomenon that I have mentioned earlier and is so fucking present on this site. While some reviews praise the show for showing that "it's okay to be strong AND girly"(such as Hadles' review, which was really splendid), and that girl shows are no less good, others either insult the show by calling it "girly, saccharine, and stupid" as if "girly" is synonymous with anything bad about a show, or feel the need to distance it from its girliness in order to praise it as if a show can't be good if it's also girly.

Some people were saying things like "the show might seem girly at first, but it's actually a good, brilliant show with intricate plot twists, well-developed characters, and even some scary moments" and "the characters aren't just shallow girly-girls, they have depth!" So what, girliness is mutually exclusive to anything of value? One person even said that the Girl-Show Ghetto was the reason they couldn't get into the show or respect it. Just...wow.

And one review even said "Rarity's pretty tough for a girly girl!" Excuse me? Tough FOR a girly girl? So being a girly girl somehow automatically disqualifies you from being tough? Like "yeah, she's tough despite being a girly girl! Because girly girls aren't supposed to be tough."

It reminds me of the phrase "you're pretty for a black girl", which, while it's never been said to ME, I have heard other people complain about. It's sick and it hurts, just like this. And the few people who didn't say things like that still said that they couldn't get into the show at first because it looked "girly and vapid", before changing their minds and thinking that the show either proved their biases about girly shows wrong, no longer think it's girly since girly shows "can't" be good, or like it "despite" it's girliness.

And there were 70 reviews in all. 70 reviews full of this misogynistic "girly is bad" shit. So in conclusion nearly all the reviews on TV Tropes for My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic were along the lines of one of three things. 1) "This show is girly so I looked past it because girly shows are dumb." 2) "This show is good despite being girly/the characters are good despite being girly." and 3) "This show is not girly to me at all because it is well-written and captivating and girly shows aren't capable of such things."

Granted, some people there were able and willing to call out those who judged the show badly for being girly(or gave it the "not like other girls" treatment, but in show form), as well as people warning other potential viewers to get rid of any potential bias they may have against it due to it being girly. But there were still more people insulting its girliness as a reason they think it sucks or denying its girliness to justify their liking of it than the other way around.

I would've accepted it in the form of "If you think this show is bad because of its inherent girliness, then you are wrong!" or "This show is proof that a show being girly or aimed at girls doesn't and shouldn't take away from its value, as people seem to believe." or "A girl can be girly and be a strong female character.", but no, instead I got shit like this. It's especially insulting when TV Tropes is a site that devotes itself in part to critiquing sexist tropes found in media, only to turn right around and reinforce them.

I don’t read TV Tropes that frequently, so I fortunately missed out on all of these complete idiots who associate girly products with being bad.

(that “pretty for a black girl” comment makes me hate all aspects of “expectations of beauty” and it’s like--plz let these die)

I could maybe see an argument for criticizing a girls show for being “saccharine” if it were like, “girls’ shows written by men who clearly don’t know how to write girls are usually bad,” because then it’s not a criticism of girls’ shows exactly but rather who keeps being put in charge of writing them.

Anonymous said:

I get so annoyed when people get upset when confronted with the matter of female representation with "what's so wrong with one show having a male protagonist or mostly men and one/a few women? Why do we have to include women in everything?" These people clearly do not understand that one show doing it is one thing, but when multiple shows do it, it's an obvious problem. It's even worse when they turn around and diss shows with largely female casts for "not having enough men".

And as for people getting upset that "every show has to include women/come with a checkbox nowadays", as if it's bad to include women in your story...look around. Women make up 50% of the population. They're literally everywhere. What reason do you have to not include a substantial amount of women?

These people act like male is the default and women are a last resort. They see no problem with men dominating a cast because it's justified(despite that not reflecting real life), and yet having female characters, or, hell, a female-dominated cast(I know they also don't reflect real life, but there are still female-dominated spaces; most colleges are 2/3 female) is "unrealistic" trying to fulfill a quota, or a straw feminist agenda, as if characters can't be female for their own sake. You shouldn't have to be forced include women because their presence should be a given.

How many stories nowadays take place in the war front in Viking times or whatever? A lot of men just don't want to include female characters or see them represented(well) in media because those who are overrepresented tend to want to stay that way. They likely also have insecurities about their masculinity and are worried about female characters flooding their shows with estrogen and ruining the shows they love, because they can't relate to female characters or enjoy shows about them without negating their girliness(ie. This show seems girly, but it's actually good), since they're ashamed to associate themselves with anything feminine due to looking down on women or seeing them as bad.

Plus they want to be the center of everything so the second a show is about mostly women they get upset and claim it's "sexist against men" because it's not about them. Hence why bronies(bless their souls) are made fun of for the grave sin of enjoying a female-centric show with a female protagonist and largely female characters. Granted, there are some freaky fans, but there's still some sexism at play here.

This reminds me of a post I saw about a boy who actually looked up to female characters because you can pick a role model who doesn’t fit your gender. Crazy concept, I know. ;P

And yeah, that’s how it goes with equality. People who are best/most represented don’t want equality because they think it means less for them and they don’t want that, like a child who doesn’t want to share their cookies with everyone else.

Anonymous said:

I love TV Tropes, but if there's one problem I have with it, it's how often it associates femininity with weakness. The "Masculine Girl, Feminine Boy" trope is a good example of this, but the worst offender in my opinion is the Girly Girl With a Tomboy Streak, as most of the examples there are simply of girls who are strong-willed or fierce or can fight. Because you know, those traits are male. It's bad because there are ALREADY tropes for girly girls who can fight, Girly Bruiser and Lady of War (which TV Tropes even goes out of its way to SAY shouldn't be counted as a "Tomboy Streak" and yet does stuff like this), but it's also bad because ANY girly girl with these qualities, no matter how feminine they are otherwise, will be seen by TV Tropes as having to be at least somewhat tomboyish(read: masculine) in order to have those traits. Because regular girly girls are just weak and fragile and only want to be housewives.

It's even worse when you realize that much of these characters are created with the exact purpose of subverting the stereotype that girliness equals weak, and instead present a new and more empowering form of femininity: that femininity is strong and DOES NOT equal being a passive sex tool for men's pleasure. They're MEANT to show that being a tomboy is not the only way to be strong, and TV Tropes acknowledges that! But then they also go and claim these characters have "Tomboy Streaks" thus undermining the positive message by insinuating that you have to be tomboyish to be strong and that even girly girls have to have some level of masculinity to be deemed respectable and equal human beings, plus manipulating many impressionable folks into thinking strength and bravery is automatically tomboyish.

Worse yet, they often put a character here because "she's a big eater" or "she burps/farts a lot". Gee, I didn't know women had bodily functions? I didn't know women had digestive systems? So basically any time a girl shows that she is a human being and not a pretty, passive doll to be idealized, she is acting like a man. Because only men are fully-fledged human beings. Even outside of that, look at basically any masculinity-femininity contrast trope(Tomboy and Girly Girl, Sensitive Guy and Manly Man, Masculine Girl Feminine Boy, etc.). The "masculine" character will often be described as dominant, assertive, or outspoken, and the "feminine" character will often be called weak-willed, passive, emotional, and timid. It's fucking sickening.

The Tomboy With A Girly Streak trope is similar to its inverse in that a tomboyish girl will often be placed under this trope with their proclaimed "girly" streak being that she's tender or cries a lot or is soft spoken/a doormat. Because being girly is about not taking up too much space, not having any ambition or aspiration, and overall being a weak and shallow waste of space. For a site that claims to dismantle such sexist misconceptions, it sure does reinforce them just as much.

I almost want to stop using TV Tropes based on that and many other reasons, but it's a genuinely informative site that at least tries to avoid these stereotypes(plus it's edited by more than one person), it just doesn't do enough. For example, they made an awkward claim once that women can't fight while on their periods, and even have an Improbably Female Cast trope, as if it's abnormal that a cast could consist of mostly women and demands an explanation. To them, femininity=inferior.

And then in comes the “anti-girl tomboy” characters who basically do everything “girls don’t do;” glares at things like make-up and such, rolls eyes at the subject of “girl talk” or “romance,” drinks anything carbonated and spreads their legs wide open, etcetera.

Guys really don’t get the same version, at least not that I’m aware of? Like, at best, they don’t participate in “guy things” but that’s about it.

Having characters acknowledge it just makes everything more blatant, like if a woman comes by and the guys have to assure “DON’T WORRY, SHE’S LIKE ONE OF THE GUYS.”

It’s like a woman can only hang out and engage in “guy talk/time” (the concept of which I hate but that’s besides the point) if they can crush a beer can against their forehead.

Anonymous said:

OMG TV Tropes called Cirno the Ice Fairy from Touhou a "tomboy"? Why? Because she's boisterous and outspoken and not a "shy girly-girl" like Daiyousei! TV Tropes clearly believes that any girl or woman who is more than just a pretty face(which ALL women are, by the way), who takes up space, who has a dynamic personality and isn't just a weeping wallflower(which I'm not saying Daiyousei is) is a tomboy. Because she's acting like a man that way. Ugh, so over TV Tropes and their sexism.

And all the girls in Touhou(including Cirno) wear big frilly dresses anyway so it doesn't really make sense to see ANY of them as tomboys. But no, apparently any girl who is rowdy or tough or is active and not passive is a tomboy. You gotta be a tomboy to have attitude. You can tell they think so because they often say things like "strong, but still feminine" as if those things are opposites. They even described femininity as "weak and susceptible, vain and superficial". Like, ugh, kill me now.

I legitimately want to see a bullet point list here of what qualifies as a “tomboy.” Like, what, anyone who does one thing that isn’t “girly”?

Can we just throw out all of these terms; not even replace them, just throw them out?

(the below ask is incomplete - the first part is missing - but the asker clarified after I asked them, so clarification is below:)

Anonymous said:

Tropes is because I'm working on a story and I hope when it becomes famous that TV Tropes will write about it, but as it stands, I'm beginning to wonder that TV Tropes undermines most stories or plots to do with women one way or another. I mean, they constantly create tropes with the intent of calling out inherent biases, yet reinforce those biases themselves.

For example, they have a trope called Men Are Generic, Women Are Special, which points out the bias of male being the default, and yet on almost every other page on the wiki describing a trope, the default character will be a "he"(especially if it's a character trope), and whenever they mention "The Hero" or "The Big Bad" it's always a he unless it needs to be female(like if the heroine is in a romance story, or if the villain is a seductress). Female characters at best, can hope to be "The Heart" or "The Chick" of the group(which is often used in a demeaning way).

They even have a trope called "Improbably Female Cast" in which they point out all the instances of a story's setting having an "over-abundance" of women or girls with no men in sight, and claim that such stories have majority female characters when it is "unusual" "unlikely" or "lacks justification". Someone even suggested that the trope should be called "Where Are All The Men?" as if there's something inherently weird or wrong when a story is dominated by female characters, and like the story is in dire need of men, as if only men can be protagonists.

Even if the story has a justifiable reason for having mostly women, the fact that the writer made that choice at all is somehow deserving of mention. The mere fact that there's no "Improbably Male Cast" trope shows where the site's biases lay. They don't see anything wrong with a show being dominated by men with little to no female representation(ex. Death Note), and yet a show dominated by women(ex. MLPFIM) is somehow an anomaly and demands an explanation(even if the story does provide a reason for it, TV Tropes will still list it and presume it "improbable", as if to say "I mean, yeah, but there's no reason why you couldn't just make them mEn instead", as if writers who have mostly female characters are going out of their way to steer away from the "default" males.

In fact, they even admit that "Men Are Generic, Women Are Special" is their reason for having such a trope, but not the inverse. They even say that it's not the trope if the show revolves around a group of girlfriends with no indication of the gender ratio in the wider setting. So any time the females outnumber the males a story it's instantly labeled "improbable" because there's NO WAY any setting AT ALL could have more females than males. That's improbable! You see, this is why when women are 1/3 of the people in a given space men perceive it as "majority female" because they're uncomfortable with women having more of a presence than men.

We'll never have true equality if shows with majority female casts continue to be scrutinized under a microscope and assumed to be of inferior, lesser quality, just because there's no male characters around and it's women who are driving the plot. My problem isn't that they have a trope for majority female casts, it COULD be a testament to gender equality(ie., "there used to not be a lot of shows revolving around women, but now they're becoming increasingly common and well-known), but it's that they single out such stories as "unlikely" and thus discredit them.

And worse yet, they refuse to change the name, because they don't see a problem with it. So now every single show that doesn't have an equal number of males and females or more males than females is going to be called "improbable" by TV Tropes, because there's something(bad) to be said about shows that choose to make most of their characters women. Death Note and Naruto can slide by the radar of having loads of men, but Madoka Magica and Touhou are "improbable"? Because they have loads of women?

the clarification:

Anonymous said:

I started out complaining about how TV Tropes says that boys will watch Star Vs. The Forces of Evil only because of Marco(who's great, but it comes off like boys can only relate to boy characters) and that the show only looks girly but has a deep complex plot with scary moments(as if a show can't be dark and complex and still be girly; girly=shallow, watered down fluff), hence my complaint about TV Tropes undermining girly shows or anything "girly".

Yup, exactly like I said.

Good stuff in “girly” things is the exception. Good stuff in “manly” things is expected.

Which is funny when you consider stuff like “edgy” reboots of things. Like, Disney remakes their original movies and that usually means making them worse (like in Beauty and the Beast - god I hate that remake - where the objects are going to become complete objects when the last petal falls even though the enchantress is explicitly a good person and it comes off as super cruel and unnecessary), but that seems to just be its own breed of bad I guess.

Then there are terms like “chick flicks” and “soap operas” which are usually women-oriented and tend to be considered dumb/over-dramatic.

You know, not like MEN shows with their sexualization of women, guns and MEN things.

Anonymous said:

Remember what I said about TV Tropes being sexist? Well, they also have a trope called "Girly Run". Like, that's literally the name. Girly. Run. Thankfully the first example(which is under advertising due to the forms of media being in alphabetical order) is an aversion from the blessed Like A Girl campaign, but...just reading the page lets the casual-yet-bold-faced sexism speak for itself.

why can’t things just be like the Sims where characters can wear whatever the hell they want and have any personality without any judgment or criticism from other Sims?

(more Madoka Magica talk - and ONLY Madoka Magica talk - below because I’ve unleashed a monster apparently:)

Anonymous said:

I know you don't like Frozen but I saw a theory somewhere that Elsa's powers came from making a contract with Kyubey and her wish was to impress her sister and anyway I can't stop rolling my eyes. This isn't(just) because of my distaste for Madoka Magica compared to my love for Frozen, but if Elsa's a Puella Magi then why didn't she become a witch long ago? How did she make it to adulthood? How did she become emotionally stable? And why do her powers have to come from a negative source?

I think it might just be people looking for excuses to do their crossover fanfiction which--yeah, I’m not crazy about that.

Anonymous said:

Did you know that Cristina Vee voiced Homura Akemi in the English Dub? It's very noticeable, especially during the Cake Song, where I could've sworn she sounds exactly like Marinette. By the way, I'm still not sure what the hell was going on in that song. Could you please explain it to me(if you know)?

Nooooo don’t make me think of Homura when I think of Marinette!! fjkdgjnfdg

lol but seriously, I think the Cake Song is just meant to be one of those “weird but meant to be dEeP” things that shows do sometimes to be cool (not a criticism technically; depends on how it’s used).

I think the cake is the labyrinth and Homura saying that she’s the pumpkin makes her the odd one out since pumpkins are associated with scares and halloween, so it’s “foreshadowing” her being the witch. The things that they say they are... they’re like--ingredients for a meal, but not a cake, so the the cake is the labyrinth and they’re the things that would go inside it.

Homura and Madoka are the only ones who really get descriptions to go with them. Homura says that she’s “full of seeds” (despair?) and Madoka implies that it’ll bring sweet dreams once she’s sliced (which is either referring to the godly freedom given to magical girls before they turn into witches, or foreshadowing Madoka being “split” after Homura stops Madoka from purifying her, leading to Homura’s “sweet dream” of what it’s like when everything is “normal” after her reality twisting).

Anonymous said:

May I ask what you don't like about Kyoko's character? Is it because she was the stereotypical "jerk with a heart of gold"? Or because the writer made her flip from hating Sayaka and wanting her dead to suddenly dying for Sayaka even though she barely knows her compared to Madoka(because the writer doesn't understand how girls' relationships work)? For me it was a mixture of both(though I still don't mind KyoSaya!), but I still liked her enough, she just felt a tad stereotypical. Your thoughts?

It’s both. I just don’t like characters like her at all and the runtime of Madoka Magica can’t maintain all of these characters, “developing” them, and then killing them off. I don’t even have any time to get attached to them because they’re dead within a matter of a few episodes.

And it’s always like, “okay here’s this character’s backstory to make you feel emotionally attached--HA NOW THEY’RE DEAD. SEE??? WE TOTALLY GOT YOU.”

Like, no, you didn’t. I didn’t even have time to care about THEM, much less their actual death.

Anonymous said:

What about the girls in Madoka Magica? Do you think they're strong female characters? Now, obviously the show is not feminist, since it misses the whole point of Magical Girl, which is to empower girls and show them that girls can be powerful and feminine and can find strength in solidarity with each other by instead making them suffer and fight each other and have their power come from their emotions, which are exploited and turned against them because women can't be powerful, but still...

It’s the same way I feel about Marinette; there are some who I want to say are strong characters, but the writing is ready to just kill them off at any time and bully them for essentially having emotions.

Basically, imagine a male writer hands you a character sheet and is like, “AW YEAH CHECK OUT THIS sTrOng FEMALE CHARACTER I WROTE.”

Like, even if they were right, their ego and obnoxiousness about the whole thing, along with what they actually do to said character, makes you not want to give them any credit for it.

Anonymous said:

How do you think Puella Magi Madoka Magica would be different if they had magical boys as well(which can mean either gender-bending canon magical girls or introducing original magical boys)? Do you think the show would be better? Worse? Or would it be just about the same?

Personally I feel like having magical boys would be good and bad; good because there would be no more of the “teenage girls are hysterical” crap and it wouldn’t just be girls suffering because they can’t handle power, and bad because it would still be problematic(for stereotyping all teens as over emotional and deserving to be taken advantage of by the Incubators, and it would still be about kids suffering in a genre meant to empower girls, having some of them be boys wouldn’t help that much).

I also feel like Gen Urobuchi would still make the girls suffer more and have them be more emotionally and mentally unstable. Holy crap it feels like he read up on Aristotle’s views on women while making this show.

It would at least be more balanced I guess? Like, teenage years are a fragile time, so it would make sense for both girls and boys to be taken advantage of. I still wouldn’t like it but it would be nice to point out, “there are emotional boys as well as emotional girls.”

Anonymous said:

Literally all the problems with Treatment of Marinette, Chat's Entitlement(TM), and the sheer sexism in general(ex. all the teenage girls and even women villains being catty and bitchy, while the male villains are cool, suave, and calculating; female villains being irredeemable scum while male villains are "not as bad as they seem", etc.) could all be solved if the show just got some more female writers! You know a show isn't feminist like people claim if none of the writers are women.

That's what I love about Friendship is Magic; the show is written and directed by a woman and actually has a variety of both male and female writers! Plus, Lauren Faust explicitly identifies as a feminist and claims her works are meant to empower women and show them that there's no wrong way to be a girl. And the show reflects that! There's no "token girl" who checks all the boxes; the females have realistic flaws, diverse personalities, and let's not forget ARE THE HEROES!!! Not to mention that the cast is actually PREDOMINANTLY FEMALE. Do people have any idea how refreshing that is?!

And that's why whenever people claim that shows like Madoka Magica are feminist when it's written by men for men while also dismissing actually feminist shows written by women for women as "sexist" or "demeaning", I cringe inside. It's not just what the show looks like, it's what the people behind it say.

And Gen Urobuchi is not a feminist. At all. Just listen to the things he says about the girls, that they're terrorists who are full of hubris and destined to be alone, and that actual magical girl shows weren't his inspiration beyond the show's cosmetics, he just based it off of porn games. He only watched those shows after making Madoka Magica and admitted they were weird to him. Well, maybe they wouldn't be weird if you actually used them as inspiration! Why are you even making magical girl? So basically he admitted that all the suffering the girls go through is because it's his fetish.

I knew I wasn't imagining things when I saw all those weird shots and angles(ex. zooming in on Sayaka's thighs and breasts when she collapses to the floor, Madoka gripping the bed sheets between her legs when agitated, zooming in on Kyoko's ass when she takes her phone out of her shorts' back pocket, it's all for cheap titillation). And yet people keep saying the show is devoid of male gaze and sexism and why? Because apparently men know how to represent women better than women themselves.

you said “Madoka gripping the bed sheets between her thighs” and it gave me an immediate flashback, I hate it

I find that it’s a similar thing with gay anime/manga; I’m more likely to trust a F/F story if it’s written by a woman since they’re less likely to sexualize everything.

Anonymous said:

Homura in Puella Magi Madoka Magica: But Madoka, what's going to happen to you? You'll end up all alone here forever! You'll never be able to see your friends and family! Homura in Rebellion: Haha, screw Madoka's friends and family! Only I am worthy of Madoka's love! That girl belongs to me! MWAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!(I'm sorry for the over exaggeration, but this is how it felt for me.)

Apparently, it was better for Madoka to just have all of her memories and powers yoinked away.

Sayaka is Madoka’s right hand girl so idk why Homura has this idea that she needs to sAvE Madoka. The fact that this whole thing comes out of a misunderstanding (because Madoka doesn’t have her memories) is so irritating.

Anonymous said:

I actually love Madoka Magica, but I completely agree with you on the hysterical women thing. Why couldn’t they just have... both magical girls and magical boys? Like, just mention that magical boys are a thing? They don’t even have to change anything but that, they don’t even really have to show it, just be like “yeah there’s magical boys too but that’s not really what this story is about, it’s about our characters we have here”. I don’t know, feels like that would have at least helped stuff.

Yeah, they don’t have to bother having the magical boys around. Just to know they exist would be enough. I mean, the fact that the focus is on them would still be bothersome (they’d probably do a thing where each girl represents a different emotion that is easily manipulated/easy to control), but it’d be something.

Anonymous said:

One thing that weirds me out when people are talking about Madoka Magica is when people refer to the characters as "little girls". Like, excuse me? They are not "little girls". They are teenagers! All of them are at least 14 years old! I hate when people call them "little", it's just so condescending and infantilizing, especially when the show does enough of that to them already. After all, no one makes that mistake with the heroines of Lucky Star and Hidamari Sketch(who are also drawn by Aoki)!

I feel like it’s the equivalent of when people call women “girls,” y’know? Sort of a “treating females as younger than they really are,” which is probably what gives guys the feeling that they have control.

For a gender that claims to be so dominant, certain ones sure have to delude themselves a lot to make themselves feel better.

Anonymous said:

I was thinking about what you said about Puella Magi Madoka Magica passing the Bechdel Test, and if it counts if there's barely any men to talk about. And while I do agree that it counts, I also feel that it doesn't really matter much in shows such as Madoka. This isn't even about feminism, this is about the fact that if a show has next to no men in it at all then it's pretty much a given that they won't talk about them since it would be impractical to talk about something that doesn't exist.

So because of that, I think there should either be an alternative test which only applies to shows that have a significant or equal number of male characters and yet the ladies still pass the test(making it feel more "real" since the option to talk about men is there), or the test should be rewritten entirely so that it only applies to shows in which the cast is either equally gender-split, or has a majority male cast/significant amount of males even if the females still outnumber them.

Reminds me of how, on TV Tropes, someone suggested that there should be a "Weak" and "Strong" Bechdel Test, where "Weak" refers to the women talking about something other than men because it is literally what's relevant at the moment(such as two female police officers discussing how to catch a female killer), thus applying the Bechdel Test there seems semi-void, while "Strong" is when they could talk about men but choose not to(ie. two female students talking about their grades during lunch).

And just to clarify about the "Strong" one, when I say they could talk about men but choose not to, this isn't to imply that female characters should talk about men, or that something's wrong with them for not talking about men, just that there's nothing stopping them from doing so, but they choose to talk about something unrelated to men. I think this strategy is much better than the test we have because it makes conversations between female characters seem more real since they're discussing things other than men of their own volition, rather than the non-male-centered talk being because they have to talk about it in-universe. I say that because The Bechdel Test serves to show that women's lives don't and shouldn't revolve around men, and they can talk about other things if they want to, but if the conversation is because they have to(like the example I gave), that gives sexists the opportunity to go "Yeah, well, they're only talking about it because it's their job!"

But if the female characters talk about things other than men of their own free will(as in, when the option is still there), then it shows that women really do have their own free will to talk about their own things and that there is NO REASON to not pass the Bechdel Test in today's day and age(I keep hearing people claim the test is stupid and doesn't matter, but then it should be easy to pass). "Oh, but if they had the choice, they would talk about men." No, because men don't sit around and talk about the women in their lives all day so why should women talk about the men in their lives all day? And to the people saying these types of tests are getting in the way of their "creativity", well, now that we know that you think female representation is stupid and something you have to be forced to do, we don't have to listen to a word you say. ;)

I like the idea of adjusting the Bechdel Test for other circumstances and expanding it as such!

You could also extend it to things like sexualization, because--I mean, having two female characters who talk to each other probably doesn’t mean much if they’re half-dressed or the writer wanted to make them bisexual for “The Fanservice.”

Anonymous said:

To be honest deconstructions of Magical Girl confuse me. There are some good ones out there(such as Princess Tutu and Revolutionary Girl Utena, so I know they're not all just torture porn, my only gripe with Utena is the implication that girls who take on the feminine "Princess" role are weak), but at its heart Magical Girl has always dealt with death, gore and pain just as much as female empowerment.

It makes me feel like the people who write these stories haven't seen magical girl and think it's all just sunshine and rainbows and that just because it's "girly" it's vapid and has no substance, and since the only way to have substance apparently is to be "dark", they go "screw it with all this princessy magical shit! Let's make our show dark instead!" When in reality if they had just sat down and watched a magical girl anime, they would understand that this is not the case.

Not to mention that many of them tend to have fanservice and the idea that magical girls have to suffer, so instead of empowering young girls, they end up misrepresenting the genre and turning it into fetish fuel torture porn for adult men(Madoka Magica and Yuki Yuna are very good examples of this; the writer of Madoka says that the girls are terrorists and full of hubris and that he was inspired by porn games). It's not that you can't deconstruct the genre at all, but it's almost never done tastefully and the magical girl themes are just a cover used to explain the suffering the girls go through. :(

Another thing about magical girl deconstructions is that they often reinforce patriarchal themes, like that girls shouldn't want things for themselves and that genuinely doing something for someone while also having ulterior motives that help yourself are a BAD BAD BAD thing, no matter how ultimately harmless they are, even if they help everybody involved. They also tend to reinforce Tall Poppy Syndrome and portray the powers as harmful or a bad thing, implying that girls shouldn't have power.

Honestly, I think there can totally be even more substance in magical girl anime that doesn’t have to resort to “make it eDgY” (which I feel like is a slippery slope that can easily come off as lazy); for example, I’d really enjoy seeing something deeper to magical girl powers than something like, “oh, this magical girl happens to have the power that fits their personality,” such as a magical girl who has a power she feels she doesn’t fit but it’s a matter of perspective/seeing herself differently, or a magical girl who does have the powers that “fit” her personality - like a “fiery” girl with fire powers - and the weaknesses in her powers correlate to the weaknesses in her personality, so she has to either iron out those issues or find workarounds, as true “perfection” isn’t possible nor practical, which is something all the girls have to accept despite whatever pressure they’re under.

.I dunno, I like lore and powers revolving around metaphors. It’s fun.

Anonymous said:

About what you said in regards to "no pueri magi because it doesn't hit the shock value threshold enough", I remember this interesting comment I saw on an article called "The Problem With The Dark Magical Girl Genre"(which I would totally recommend checking out, by the way!) which said that shojo magical girl and seinen magical girl both embrace a different philosophy regarding strong female fighters. In shojo, they tend to embrace femininity as a strength and show girls that they have the power to do whatever they want and undergo dangerous professions. But in seinen, which conveniently enough is more likely to "deconstruct" the genre(ugh), rather than admiring the girls and supporting them in their endeavors, the girls are meant to be pitied(often to the point of infantilization) when bad things happen to them, with the fact that they are girls serving to make everything worse. It operates under the idea that girls are fragile, in need of protection, and shouldn't be fighting at all.

That's why deconstructions like Madoka Magica and Yuki Yuna don't sit right with me, and also why I don't consider them feminist series. People can say whatever they want about Sailor Moon and Pretty Cure, but ultimately they also had dark and dangerous themes(to the point where some kids had nightmares), but ultimately allowed the girls to rise above the hell they went through and find the strength in them to save the day. We feel bad for them when they die, not because they're moe girls, but because we were actually given the time to form a connection with them and want to see them succeed, rather than just be expected to pity them because they're cute manipulated girls. That way, when they ultimately save the day, it's all the more satisfying. Princess Tutu was a deconstruction that actually went about it in the right way, because the girls eventually found the courage to defeat their enemies in a way that made sense. Why the hell is it a "good" thing to subvert that?

No clue, but I basically agree with everything there. I mean, Madoka Magica’s entire stick is basically that all the girls are like “uwu” in terms of the style (with Madoka being the “cutest” of them all) and then being put in this dark and edgy plot+setting; it’s for both the shock value and the “contrast” of having “moe” characters be thrust into these situations to essentially die.

And the conclusion doesn’t end up being satisfying (at least to me) because the villain doesn’t have emotions so he’s just like “owo” (seriously, I wouldn’t hate on Rebellion so much if Kyubey had been given emotions rather than going crazy; Homura can basically do whatever she wants and it was SUCH A MISSED OPPORTUNITY) so it ends up being more about the journey getting there like wow look at all the sUbvErSiOnS and dEaTh we had along the way!

Because at the end of the day, it’s still like, “the girls give into their ‘hysterical emotions’ in the end basically no matter what,” even if they get saved by Madoka in the end.

Anonymous said:

Do you remember, in Madoka Magica, when Kyubey said that humans would still be living in caves if not for the Incubators? First of all, keep in mind what Incubators do. Their entire purpose on this earth is to feed off the emotions of young teenage girls as they spiral into despair as a result of their delusions of power. Like wow, let that sink in. Apparently humanity's advancement relies on the exploitation of women. We are literally the punching bags of the universe. Isn't it lovely?

No! You see--we’re so important to the world! If we weren’t emotionally exploited, the world wouldn’t be the way it is now! :D

(kill me)

Anonymous said:

I once saw a tag on tumblr that read "The only good magical girl anime is Madoka Magica because it's gay, and even it has problems." Like, ugh. Really? Has this person not watched ANY other magical girl anime? Such ignorance. So many things wrong with that statement that I can't--and WON'T--even begin to unravel here.

MADOKA MAGICA IS NOT GAY AND I’M SO TIRED OF PEOPLE CLAIMING IT IS

s T O P

I DON’T EVEN CONSIDER YURI ON ICE TO BE GAY. MADOKA MAGICA? NAH MAN.

Anonymous said:

Do the girls in Madoka Magica even have transformation phrases? You know, like how Marinette says "Tikki, spots on!" or how Sailor Moon says "Moon Prism Power! Make-up!" or how Iris in LoliRock says "Iris! Princess of Ephedia!" etc. But in Madoka Magica, there doesn't seem to be any of that. At least in Yuki Yuna they pressed a button on their phones. But how do the Puellae Magi even transform? Just goes to show you how Gen Urobuchi knows next to nothing about the genre he claims to deconstruct.

Transformation phrases are magical and cool and you can’t take that away from me.

Anonymous said:

I had a shower thought about Madoka randomly in bed last night: If a Magical Girl's Soul Gem loses control over its user when 100 metres or further away from it, that meant that when Homura got Sayaka's Soul Gem back for her, Sayaka should've regained consciousness once Homura was less than 100 metres away, even if she didn't have her Soul Gem yet. I also love to ponder why on Earth Homura would even bother retrieving Sayaka's Soul Gem if she only cares about Madoka and Madoka's well-being.

I think it’s just a complicated process of Homura trying to make sure Madoka doesn’t fall into despair herself (in a non-witch way) and is convinced to make a wish.

Anonymous said:

The more I think about it, the more I realize that Sayaka really got the worst deal out of the whole thing. While her story may seem more "mundane" compared to the others(she just wanted the token Ill Boy osananajimi to like her back), she's the only one who somehow isn't brought back when Madoka recreates the universe, loses her Soul Gem on more than one account(and on the second, she starts decomposing and her crush sees her and calls her a monster because he thinks she's pretending to be the REAL Sayaka), is supposedly the weakest Magical Girl, getting swiftly taken out by both Kyoko AND Homura(the latter of which doesn't even make sense, if her body can heal why was she taken out so quickly?), takes a long while to show up in Magia Record, and Gen somehow finds it suiting to single her out as the one who is "destined to die" every time she makes a contract. Apparently the series director wanted Sayaka to live/be brought back, but Gen refused because it just had to be edgy.

Of course, MEN are allowed to have wish fulfillment power fantasies and dream like the sky's no limit and aspire to be all they want to be, but the second WOMEN try to be the strong ones, the powerful ones, or dream of something for themselves and others, they have to learn a lesson about how unrealistic their fantasies are and how they'll never live out their dreams. Hence why Sayaka puts the blame all on herself, saying that she's not a hero and was stupid and selfish the whole time.

"token Ill Boy osananajimi“ dfhbgjhfdgdfg

It was a real shame because I liked Sayaka somewhat (not saying much but still) and she was such a predictable one to go. Like, “oh wow, an angst-y anime all about shock value? so basically the best friend is dead then with no chance of survival.”

I think I do remember being told/reading somewhere (so don’t quote me) that Sayaka is the one that’s hardest to keep alive in the games, so you have to work hard for it. It just sucks.

Anonymous said:

Yet another thing that bothers me about Puella Magi is how the show frames the young ladies as if everything is their fault even though they have no idea what they're getting into because the person who makes the deal doesn't even bother explaining shit to them and all the show's attempts at deconstructing is just taking lighthearted elements meant to empower girls and show them that they can be brave and strong as well as feminine and make them dark and morbid.

Like, I get the whole "having young girls fight is a little unrealistic" aspect, but most magical girl shows actually do touch on that! Only difference is that over time, they become stronger and better at fighting(which is only to be expected, whether you're a teenage girl or not) and become more competent along the way because the whole genre is about FEMALE EMPOWERMENT.

Not to mention how the show seems to forget that the Incubators are villains and even seems to put them in the right and the girls in the wrong, what with the claim that they rationalize with the girls they make contracts with like sentient human beings(yeah, because emotionally manipulating young girls and literally taking their souls out of their bodies and making them liches without their consent is definitely treating them like sentient human beings), and that they always follow up on their end of the deal whereas it's the girls' faults their wishes go sour because they never wish for what they truly want(I'm sorry, but I simply DO NOT buy that. Homura and Mami outright wished for what they wanted. Their wishes went sour because the plot "decided" that they should have wished in a different way; plus, you're telling me that if Sayaka had outright said she wished "for Kyousuke to love her back" that the show wouldn't just "make" him mind-controlled or have Sayaka "outgrow" her feelings by the time he falls in love with her, all the while making it out to be "her" fault he's so heartbroken because she was some kind of tease or whatever, further demonizing girls' sexualities?).

Plus they explicitly claim that every woman in history was a magical girl and that without them, humanity would still be in caves(as in, humanity wouldn't be able to progress without the oppression and exploitation of women, and women can't gain power without going insane because female power is some unhealthy, inhuman, infernal thing.). Even if we take this all as a reflection of patriarchal society(which I highly doubt it was, if anything, it reinforces it), all it does is imply that the oppression of women is the natural order of things, required even.

As for the girls themselves, they routinely beat themselves up and the show makes no effort to tell them they're wrong(up until the massive cop-out of an ending), like how Sayaka's last words before becoming a witch are literally her "admitting" that she was "stupid, so stupid" for wanting a boy to love her and be healed of his infirmity. It just seems like we're supposed to think "you know, maybe the Incubators aren't that bad!" while ignoring that the girls are being treated like the disposable trash bags of the universe. This show already does the magical girl genre dirty but treating it like everything the Incubators did was necessary and like it's all the girls' faults these things happened to them in the first place is the icing on the stale, sour cake. Nothing like a giant heap of sexism to help get you through your day. :/

I’ve noticed this a lot in Miraculous, but Madoka Magica somehow does it worse; this “one (supposed) mistake leads to all of these consequences you never saw coming.”

Like Ladybug calling Lila out. We know that Lila’s pettiness in “Chameleon” shows that it wouldn’t matter whether Ladybug yelled at her or not; the simple fact that Marinette opposes a liar led to Marinette getting expelled, even if only for a while. Then there’s “Miracle Queen” and all that garbage that came with it.

These two shows put their teenage girls through hell for having emotions and there’s no way to undo it.

Anonymous said:

Honestly, the Madoka Magica fandom is basically the magical girl equivalent of "not like other girls" type women. I can't say I'd be surprised if they didn't watch a single magical girl show other than Madoka because they're all "stupid and girly but this one is edgy and dark" just because those shows are written by women to inspire other girls and show femininity as a strength while Madoka Magica is written by men for men who want to see young girls suffer without any actual feminism.

Like, let's go through their arguments one-by-one to prove that they don't hold up. They love to say that Madoka Magica is better than other Magical Girl shows because "it's dark and edgy and shows the downsides to being a Magical Girl unlike other shows where it's all sunshine and lollipops". First of all, other Magical girl shows also got very dark. Princess Tutu and Utena are also "darker" takes on the genre, but even more lighthearted shows like Sailor Moon and Precure had scary moments.

The only difference is, with them, they still managed to critique problematic aspects of the genre and actually provided ways to improve it, while STILL managing to keep their target audience(FEMALES) in mind, without condescending to them and infantilizing them. And they still showed the girls being empowered and overcoming the darkness.

In Madoka, there's none of that, there's no actual critique of the genre because Gen didn't have the respect for it to do his research, it's aimed at men so it doesn't keep female viewers in mind by definition(which is also another reason why it can't be a deconstruction; deconstructions should be done FOR its target audience), and the girls are constantly put down and treated like Moe crybabies by the narrative even when they're not(cause, you know, teenage girls are "emotional"!). And it doesn't offer ways the genre could improve, it just takes a female-empowering genre and twists it to be this system of oppression that the genre is meant to avoid.

Magical Girls tend to have a very strong focus on girls empowering girls and all that awesome stuff, and yet when Madoka and Mami form a special bond and Madoka encourages Mami by telling her she's not alone? It makes her big-headed and overconfident and she gets devoured by Charlotte. See what happens when girls rely on each other? Madoka is Sayaka's best friend, but gets pushed aside in favor of Kyoko, who later dies for Sayaka because girls who want to help each other had better be prepared to suffer and die for their beliefs. Sayaka loses everything, which happens to include her best friend, over a guy. And the whole witch process means that any female solidarity that could be found in the show is thrown out the window since the core concept of the show is girls being forced to brutalize and kill and exploit each other.

People act like Madoka is Yuri when it's not, Gen was asked if Homura really was in love with Madoka and if Kyoko really was in love with Sayaka, and what did he do? He beat around the bush. Naoko Takeuchi and Kunihiko Ikuhara(the latter of whom also worked on Sailor Moon R; woah, what a surprise) both admitted that there was gay love in their stories, yet people act like Madoka is super progressive regarding homosexuality when it's just implied and those shows were MUCH more open! Doesn't stop people from claiming the show is "honorary yuri" and saying that the meaning of "yuri" should be broadened to include any close bonds between two female characters, whether or not it's actually romantic, AND favoring the show(and HomuMado) above actual yuri shows that are made to appeal to women. If all this were actually valid, Sailor Moon would be yuri as hell.

I hate seeing people fap over this show and act like it's so revolutionary for recycling things that the genre was ALREADY DOING, because I know full well that the ONLY reason it gets this wide acclaim is because Magical Girl shows have traditionally been written for women and this show is aimed at men. That's literally it. Because nothing a woman writes is good enough, especially when it dares to go against patriarchal constructs of femininity as weak and docile by portraying it as cool and awesome. It doesn't matter how cool and dark and diverse and inclusive and complex Sailor Moon and Precure and Princess Tutu and Utena are, they're written by/for women with the intention of empowering them so they're automatically invalid, cheap, happy-go-lucky crap where nothing bad ever happens and anything those shows try to do ought to be discredited because they don't appeal to men like they should so what's the point?

But the second a MAN comes in and intrudes on a female-dominated space by doing all of those things but with a very shallow understanding of how they ought to be executed, people are all over it because a MAN did it and now it's interesting and respectable! I have seen so many people say that they don't like Magical Girl because it's girly and shallow and stupid, but then they praise Madoka for things that the girly and "shallow" shows have already done! Men are always taking away things meant for women and distorting it to fit their patriarchal views and yet when they do it it's somehow better and anyone who complains is simply a whiny straw feminist!

The fandom does it all the time, someone complains about the show and why they don't like it and find it sexist, and the response is always "you're just not smart enough to understand it; you have no idea what you just watched". Because obviously since it's made by a man it's sooo much smarter then the traditional sappy stuff made by women. That's why it's so annoying when others praise it at the expense of other works in the genre: they know their reasons for liking it are, more often than not, rooted in sexism against female-aimed and female-empowering works, so the only way they can praise it is at the expense of said works, hence them being just like girls who claim they're "not like other girls" when there's nothing wrong with girls being feminine and in fact many of those girls may like the same things you do!

So while I'm not saying there's anything inherently WRONG with liking Madoka, I DO have a problem with people who act like it's better or more serious than other shows in the genre and simply discard them on the grounds that they're "for girls", since they obviously didn't watch them.

me when I initially watched Madoka Magica: I don’t get why this exists.

me when I learned it was written by a man: ohhh, now I get it.

I also take issue with people comparing things that are made for different demographics. Like look, I don’t care if you enjoy your angst display over here, but also maybe don’t compare it to the stuff not even made for you unless you’re willing to get into a fight over it?

It comes off wrong, like they have to trash on stuff because it wasn’t made for them, y’know?

Anonymous said:

Honestly, I am so sick of people saying that Magical Girl shows are sexist or anti-feminist, when all they do is portray girls being awesome and powerful while also being feminine at the same time, because "Well in Japan it's actually gender conformity because it's telling girls they can only be strong if they're feminine! You're just projecting your Western values onto an Eastern work!".

First of all these shows are made by women for women and often have explicit feminine messages that you literally cannot miss unless you are simply blind or trying not to see them. And they also tend to have a very strong focus on women supporting or empowering other women. Just think of Sailor Moon, which constantly gets this "criticism", and yet there's an episode where the girls explicitly protest against a villain who claims women are all shallow and useless and can't do anything without men's help. Would Naoko Takeuchi put that in the show if she weren't a feminist?

And then there's the fact that she has said that one message she wanted the female leads to convey was to value their relationships between other girls because girls are strong and don't need to waste time depending on men. There's also the fact that most Magical Girl shows tend to treat the powers as something special and awesome that's unique to women and girls, paired with the coming-of-age themes present in the show, and you get a magical equivalent of female puberty, with magic mixed in.

But no, all of that gets thrown out the window because they dare to be "feminine" while doing all of that stuff and the Japanese are forcing their girls to be girly through Magical Girl propaganda. And I just HATE when people act like anything feminine must be societally forced onto girls, rather than girls just happening to like them. In addition, stating that they are simply reinforcing gender roles by being feminine is such bullshit because the whole purpose isn't about conforming to patriarchal femininity, it's about reclaiming femininity.

Too often, femininity is associated with being weak, powerless, helpless, submissive, docile, vapid, catty, bitchy, petty, vain, stupid, the list goes on. Magical Girl saves femininity from a bad reputation. It shows femininity in a new light, as something strong and powerful and, hell, even admirable! It's about telling girls "Hey, you can be strong and powerful and smart, but you don't have to be a tomboy or act like a man to do so". Girls are always told they have to act masculine to be taken seriously because the only way to be respected is to be like a man, which is an indirect way of saying that only men deserve respect.

Magical Girl does away with all that in favor of showing the feminine as something innately powerful, and yet naysayers MISS the point and say that it's just stereotyping girls instead. To see people claim that Magical Girl forces girls to fit a feminine ideal to be respected is just disappointing. It's supposed to be a female power fantasy for young girls that shows them as the ones being powerful and empowering each other.

Take how in Sailor Moon the heroine often says something along the lines of "I won't let you take advantage of girls", which Wedding Peach went on to imitate. The purpose of the genre is for girls. To empower girls. So why on earth would they show them fitting into a "male" mould of power? Do these people think that any time women are shown acting distinct from men that they are doing something wrong?

And the hypocritical part is that nobody pisses on male-oriented anime for reinforcing a harmful narrative to boys that they have to be masculine to be valued and respected. Of course they don't! Because being "masculine" is never seen as a bad thing to be. It's assumed that masculinity is always strong and good and awesome and there's nothing wrong with boys being forced to be masculine because you're supposed to want to be masculine. You're not supposed to want to be feminine.

So of course people will shit all over Magical Girl for embracing, empowering, and reclaiming femininity, because it's not supposed to be that way! You're not supposed to be feminine and also be strong. You're supposed to deny your identity as a woman and assimilate into the boys' club because only boy things are worthwhile! And they cover it up by saying that Magical Girl forces girls to be feminine, when in actuality the WORLD forces girls to be MASCULINE. Magical Girl doesn't force girls to be feminine, It ALLOWS them to. Do you see the difference there?

Another thing I'd like to bring to the table is that the claim is racist and here's why: The claim that "Magical Girl shows are seen as feminist in the US for portraying femininity as a source of strength but not in Japan because it's telling girls they have to be feminine"...what does that mean? Japanese people can't be feminist? All Japanese people are sexists and think girls have to fit in a certain role? Do Japanese feminists HAVE to be anti-femininity? Are there literally no Japanese people who think you can be feminine AND strong(who also obviously identify as feminists?) Because it seems hella sexist to insinuate that Magical Girl shows are sexist because they're made in Japan and they don't believe you can be feminine AND strong there.

While there is some credibility to it since Japan IS, by and large, much more strict with gender roles, hasn't it ever occurred to these people that these types of shows exist to counter that belief? Not only that, but it implies that people aren't allowed to have opinions on works that aren't made in their culture, and that anyone who sees those shows as feminist are just projecting their Western beliefs onto an Eastern work. And even worse, when people say that, they don't have the same opinion of Western Magical Girl works.

Just look at LoliRock, Miraculous Ladybug, Winx, W.I.T.C.H., Star vs the Forces of Evil, and countless other European/Western Magical Girl works. Where are the people saying "They get their power from femininity and that is sexist!"? Nowhere! They're silent! Even though those are very much like Magical Girl works from Japan(although I don't think the genre originated from there), while still being original.

It's because people think that any media exported from Japan is automatically sexist and demeaning and so anything they create, no matter how empowering their intentions, gets twisted into something that's somehow toxic or unsafe for girls to watch. But when Europeans do the exact same thing nobody complains. Because Japan is not allowed to do anything empowering whatsoever; something's always wrong with it, apparently.

So that's why I have a problem with people who say those things; it's so problematic because they think they're being all open-minded and aware/respectful of other people's cultures, but all they're doing is reinforcing negative stereotypes further. It's kinda like what I said earlier(in another ask) about how people love to praise Madoka Magica for being a unique, dark, and interesting take on the genre when all it did was rehash elements of the genre that already existed, strip away the female empowerment, and gear it towards grown men, which is why people like it more. How about instead of speaking for Japanese people you let them speak for themselves?!

I would also like to add that there’s even a limit to women acting masculine because that’s still “not enough” for those kinda of men who would promote those beliefs. Women need to act more masculine to “be taken seriously” but then you have men who’ll tell them to “dress less” or whatever.

I think what it comes down to is that they want women to not be “emotionally taxing” with all those dAmN eMoTioNs of theirs (unless it’s for the sake of their angsty magical girl anime where the girls suffer for having emotions), but they also need to look pretty and be sexualized.

We can’t win.

#other: ask and answer #other: non ml talk

[goldeneyedgirl]

JALICEWEEK20 DAY 6

The Way of Things

JaliceWeek20 Day 6: Reincarnation

Notes: I... don’t know. It just sort of happened? This wrote itself. There were a few more lifetimes I thought about including (there was a Jessamine and Alice ‘life’ that I really wanted to include but it’ll be a standalone fic once I’ve done a bunch of research) but I think I’m happy with it? 

This was absolutely inspired by a gorgeous Thor fic I read a few years ago based in Norse mythology and the creation of Yggdrasil; if I can find it, I will absolutely link it because it was an incredible piece of writing. 

Also go me! I’m kind of getting a hang of writing sex adjacent scenes! I remember not being able to look directly at my cursor when I implied a blow job in Shadow to Light, I’m oddly proud!

Now, just the second part to Against a Wall. 

Word Count: 4,322

NSFW - not graphic but yeah. 

--

Soulmates are funny things. They do not start out existence together; they must find each other - it might take one life time, it might take ten. It is important they undergo this struggle; some souls are not meant for regeneration - they shine and burn out within a lifetime or two. But others get stronger, more powerful, during those early searching years.

And one they find one another, they are forever more entangled. The oldest and strongest eventually fuse, unable to be separated in life or death.

Of course, eventually they burn out. But not in a tragic way; more like in a way that is last page of a very good book; the wilting of a final flower in autumn; the way snow melts in early spring, with sense of peace and satisfaction, and utter tranquility. And as they dissolve into starlight and dust, they begin the cycle anew. It is neither good nor bad or anything in between.

It is simply the way of things.

—

When they meet the first time they are vampires in Dacia - the land that will become Romania. It is an era of indulgence for vampires in that region, and if any records had been kept, it would have declared nearly dangerous levels of changes.

She is Alis, a peasant girl changed by a careless vampire who fed and left her in a ditch. She’s a gentle beauty, with long dark hair, sharp and cunning eyes, and even after the change, her skin maintains a slightly golden tint of someone who spent their life in the sun.

He is Jesper, who mentions nothing of where he came from or what he was before he arrived to hover at the fringes of the Romanian court. He has a reputation in the court, with the ladies and the men both, and Alis is entirely aware and slightly amused by that. She catches his eye more than once, but is illusive like a quicksilver, unbent and unbowed.

Until she isn’t.

It’s been a good hunt, blood soaked through their clothes to their skin that they lick off each other in their frenzy, and she learns exactly how he developed such a reputation. He learns exactly what he was looking for as he finds himself skin to skin with the spirited girl that has always seen him coming before he could catch her. But he has her now, and he’s not letting go.

She doesn’t seem to mind. They become a common sight, as a pair, their hands constantly entangled. They are not at court to curry favour or power or anything more than their next meal, but their relationship is magnetic, and more than one jealous or yearning gaze falls upon them as he presses hot kisses to her neck as he ties a choker of sapphires or diamonds around her pale throat.

The Volturi attack a century or so later, and they stand with the Romanians, their leaders and their friends. He remembers thinking they cannot possibly fail; they are the side of the kings, of the angels. He remembers admiring her as they lined up; the way she had pinned her hair with the silver clasp he’d given her, the way her dress fit her and the smirk on her lips that promised something to look forward to in their personal victory celebrations.

They don’t survive. In the chaos of the battle, it is hard to say how they each fell - the Volturi take no prisoners anyway, so a quick death in battle is preferable to an execution. But they fall and they are burnt, and their ashes mingle in the purple-grey smoke that fills the field.

When Lord Aro finds a silver hair clasp discarded on the battlefield, still clinging to a clump of dark hair, he pockets it and later presents it to Sulpicia, polished to shine and on a bed of velvet. It is a curious and beautiful piece, the shape of a raven’s wing, and it quickly joins the Volturi’s treasury without a single thought given to its origins.

—

In whatever counts as the afterlife for souls and spirits, they reunite. It will take more than one life to work out their powers, the boundaries, of this resting place - how to shape it to their preferences, how to give themselves form. For now, it is just a long horizon of contrasting light, and they are little more than sentient energy, mingling and expressing regret and pain at the demise of the other, of relief of being reunited, of contentedness being once again with the other.

Time is not something that exists on this plane, and soon they learn how to change what is around them; a swathe of sandy beach that meets perfectly clear water, expansive grassy plains that fit between quiet, looming forests that are quiet and cool. They are no more fixed than any other aspect of this space, but it remains unexpectedly consistent.

Sometimes, there is a house. It’s immediate form never changes, but the outside facade does, as the lifetimes pass them by. Somethings a log cabin, other times an English cottage, or a farmhouse, or a bamboo hut. It is their every-changing, ever-evolving desires, a nod to their shared past and their hopes for the future. It is their reward, their sanctuary.  

They learn how to shape themselves as well. She fluctuates a little more than him, but she is always small, always naturally dark-haired, always cunning but sweet. He is always tall and always blonde and too charming for his own good, and sometimes not he is she, blonde and tall and could charm birds from the trees. It doesn’t matter either way; the small one greets them just the same, with enthusiasm and passion and sweet sadness at their demise but always joy at their return.

And that is where they are together until the next life.

—

The next life is simpler; a part of a nomadic tribe. She is married, in their customs, to him when she is little more than a child and he just barely a man. And despite how they were raised, he is kind and gentle to her and has no interest in her as a wife before she becomes a woman.

It is a hard year, a bad year, as they travel the mountains and ridges, the snow sharp against their faces. Few of the tribe have born children that year, and less still have lived through the winter; when food is so scarce, the dying are calmly let go so that the rest might survive. There is an undercurrent of resentment when he hoists his child-bride onto his back so that she might make the climb; that he, young and strong and likely to live long and hardy, gives his share of food and water to the bony waif he is bound to.

But she lives through that year, and the next. She lives enough years that they are both ready for her to become a wife, and everyone who scorned her frailness, her smallness, the waste of a strong husband on such a girl, is shocked when she conceives and carries his child so easily. First a son, then two daughters, all born close enough together that the old women of the tribe mutter.

The tribe becomes stronger, settles in one place for longer and longer periods of time - where food and water are plentiful and they are safe from predators and other threats.

She dies during her fourth pregnancy, slipping away in an ocean of blood no one could have prevented. Her eyes are wild and frightened, and he promises that he’ll watch over their children and see them safe, and weeps openly over her body and that of his second son.

He dies after his second daughter is married to a neighbouring tribe, to a boy who looks at her like she is a miracle, and he knows his job is done. The death is quiet, in the still of the night, in the shelter that he once shared with her. As he passes from the world, he remembers the nights when it was him and her amongst the furs, and then their children pressed between them, and then the  firm bulge of the child who would ultimately kill her. He holds no resentment for the cause of her death, just a faint and worn sadness, and as he drifts away, he is certain he can hear her laughing.

—

He is a soldier, to protect his family, for a cause he finds entirely repulsive. But he mouths the words and holds the gun, and does not recognise her when he is ordered to shoot. Why would he? They’ve never met. She dies in the mud, and it doesn’t matter anyway, because they end up naming him a traitor and he dies in prison heavy with regrets.

In their sanctuary, they reunite in silence, with sad eyes and gentle embraces. Whatever powers above govern creation, they still send the souls and soulmates to earth, to be swallowed up and spat back out by human machinations, human fears and flaws and greed.

It is simply the way of things.

—

She is a barefoot thief in the streets of Paris, dangerously fast, and subtle of hand. She tells no one her story, or at least, no one her truth. Ragged and smirking, people mistake her for a child, and so there is little trouble to be had - if she’s caught at all.

She runs into him, lounging in an alleyway, tricking lords and ladies out of coins wiht sleight of hand, and is delighted with their potential. She’s old enough to be charmed by sharp green eyes and a lazy grin, and young enough to contemplate the sheer levels of chaos they can cause.

They live like kings those next few years, pinching pearls and purses, watches and rubies, and living in an icy dormer room wearing stolen rings to convince others of things they’ll get around to eventually. It’s really not much - a narrow bed with wafer thin blankets and a shared pillow; water that runs cold and brown into a bucket; pigeons that nest in the rafters and shit all over their clothing.

Doesn’t seem to matter, though, when she welcomes his kiss and sleepily encourages him when he rolls on top of her during the late night hours, frost forming on the weave and weft of their clothes. When their work is good, he brings her flowers from the seller on the corner, and she tucks her pockets full of cakes for them to share, and really, neither could imagine a finer life than together in their little tower.

But time marches on, and soon they recognise that the tricks that have gotten them this far in life aren’t going to be overlooked forever. There are less nobles on the street, less coin and jewellery to be fleeced, and so they decide to leave for the country - he’s not afraid of dirty work, and she’s not afraid of anything.

The journey will be long, and she steals a book for him on their way - he’s determined to teach her to read. It’s a neat little Bible with a smart green cover with the name ‘C-a-r-l-i-s-l-e C-u-l-l-e-n’ written in neat script on the front page.

They settle in a village, where she becomes a laundress, then a seamstress, and he finds work with horses. They marry in the village parish, where the kind priest is happy to absolve them of the sin of living as man and wife before their vows, and keep their secret. They exchange stolen rings for ones of brass, from a jar the priest keeps for that purpose.

There’s a tiny two-room cottage they occupy; those early years of hunger and neglect have left their mark on them both, and so there are no children in this life. But there is an endless parade of animals that he brings home tucked under his jacket; wounded or lost or discarded, and she finds that she doesn’t so much mind waking up to a blind duck on their bed or a sickly fox on the pillow next to her, when he is always so pleased with their progress, with their improving health. He saves more than he loses, and he takes pride in that. Some are set free and returned to the wild, but others linger until they are something of a spectacle in town - the house with all the animals.

They live a long life, a good one, and it ends peacefully. They are buried side by side in the village cemetery, with wooden crosses that bare their names, and prayers muttered in their honour.

But one Carlisle Cullen never gets his Bible back.

—

The good lives give them less time together in the in-between, if such a thing could be accurately measured. They wade, knee-deep into that perfect ocean that stretches out to their infinite horizon, hand-in-hand, and then they both feel it; that fizzing, tingling feeling as whatever oversees them pulls them back; back into bodies and minds, back into lives and places, and they once again have to go through the push and pull of finding the other and crossing their fingers it’ll happen sooner rather than later.

As he becomes nothing again, he holds her smile tight in his mind with a prayer that this will be the time, this will be the life, that he’ll recognise her for who she is to him as soon as he sees her.

She hopes its a long life, a good one, with his hand in hers always.

—

He’s reborn in Texas in 1863 and dies nineteen years later, only to rise again.

She’s born in Mississippi in 1901 and dies nineteen years later, only to rise again.

They meet in 1948, and if he knew any better, he’d tease her about keeping him waiting for thirty-seven years, six months, and three weeks. But it will be a while more before they both remember things like that, so he can’t. Instead, he falls completely and utterly in love with her, in a way that echoes right back through to that very first meeting in Dacia.

He wonders if its possible to miss someone he’d never met before, when he takes her hand. She wonders if he’s going to disappear, to startle and panic about the future that lies before them and leave her behind.

He kisses her like a starving man, and she almost immediately drags him - a willing supplicant - into her bed because it doesn’t matter what life they’re living, she’s never been particularly subtle. He knows exactly what to do to make her scream indecently, and she puts her mouth to every single one of his scars, and he wishes he could weep - with relief and guilt and a million other things that are knotted up inside his head.

And she will untangle each and every single one with enough time.

They unknowingly draw from each of the lives that have come before - they are nomadic for more than two years, criss-crossing across the country. He is no less fixated on animals - as a human, it was the training of them; as a vampire, they are his salvation. Their hands are always entangled, their gazes always on the other.

This time, they find a family, and some quiet, subconscious little corner of her mind decides she likes that they aren’t alone this time. There’s a small joy in the memory of a ‘family’, and a warm feeling - one that she doesn’t know originated from a long-ago life where they were the ones welcoming new children into their heart and home, one she doesn’t quite recognise. But families are shaped so many different ways, and the Cullens are just another way to fit together, and so they stay.

It’s a good life, an untroubled life - at least until Edward gets tangled up with a human girl and the cursed Volturi. Somewhere, the great puppet master jerks the strings and decides that if history is so desperate to repeat itself, well, it might as well put on a show.

They escape the Volturi once (a flight to Italy to save an idiot brother), and twice (Renesmee shall live, Joham shall die, and Aro leaves without any new amusements and deeply, infinitely disappointed in his beloved Carlisle).

Third time’s a charm.

—

Aro’s great error shall go down in history as underestimating the damage he has done assembling his collection, the rage and resentment that boils like an undercurrent in the vampire world. He is not a beloved leader, but a feared one.

In truth, which will be lost to both time and the fact that the powers above don’t keep written or oral histories as humans comprehend them, his undoing is two things: the fact that in all things there must be balance.

And an ancient silver hair clasp shaped like a raven’s wing, that his Sulpicia wears in her hair as they arrive at the battlefield, cloaked and over-confident.

The battle is ugly and fatal and messy and all those things wars usually are, and there is no certainty in their victory, not with the wolves involved, with the shifters and the cryptids that have crawled out of every shadow and space to be done with Aro and Caius forever.

(Stefan and Vladimir are naive if they think they will fill the vacuum left behind in Aro’s wake; Jasper takes them both out quietly on the battlefield, when neither of them can call out the betrayal or identify their killer. Sometimes ugly things need to be done, and he’s not above getting his hands dirty.)

The battleground is smokey and even her supernatural eyes struggle to see through the gloam; her dead heart heavy as she looks for him. Voices call for help; for missing limbs, for injuries, for protection and she ignores each and every one.

She doesn’t know why she stops at the sight of a silver hair clasp, ancient and lost in the mud. Or why she reaches for her own hair, cut short.

Or why she picks it up and unlocks something inside her own mind. It is not an explosion of information, a supernova of memory. It is simply an intense awareness of who she is and who she was and who she will be. It is a confidence in her stride as she moves through the battlefield with a sense of self she has not known since before her home was known as ‘Romania’.

Jasper is bent and twisted, Rosalie limp on the ground, and those vicious, hideous twins hold them captive, like fish twitching on the line. Their deaths are not imminent, because who could take down the little vipers and stop their little game?

Jane’s head is off her body, and Alec’s too, before Jasper has shaken off the pain, expecting Peter or Maria or Emmett to have gotten a lucky shot and dismembered Aro’s little favourites.

Instead, it is his mud-streaked wife with a strange look in her eyes and emotions skittering over her skin like static. A battlefield is no place for a lover’s reunion, but she still bestows a kiss on his kneeling form (so ready for his own execution) that is so positively lascivious that it takes him a minute to remember himself.

And then he remembers himself.

The scales have been rebalanced, and the fight is won by a toss of a coin that finds Aro, Caius, and Marcus on their knees in the mud, waiting for their own trial. The oldest of the gathered line up - Carlisle, Amun, Maria, the Chinese coven - to pass their judgement, but the memories that press on both of them demand their pound of flesh, and Edward eyes them both uneasily.

Instead of violence, of sliding down a slope that turns them back into the monsters of old, into the truest of nightmares, Alice crouches in front of Aro with her wide dark gold eyes, and pulls the hair clasp from her pocket.

Aro��s rage is cold, at the few strands of Sulpicia’s hair that are still trapped in the metal, and if he could, he’d shred her to pieces in that moment, gift be damn. But she smiles sweetly, and strokes the etched feathers.

“Did you know?” she asks quietly, only loud enough for the fallen Volturi kings to hear, and Edward who hovers in case this spirals into a cataclysm, “When he gave me this, I mean?”

Aro stares at her, straining to touch her and understand, but his guard holds him tight and all he can do is sneer at her.

“The night before you brought your army,” Alice plucks the strawberry-blonde hairs from the fixture and tosses them into the mud. “He pinned this in my hair and we danced; we thought we’d win. And I suppose we did.”

Aro gapes at her, Caius is spitting curses, and Marcus is just pleading for his peaceful death - and how many lifetimes has he lived without Didyme, has he wanted to return to that in-between space?

She sees the scar on Esme’s face and finds it hard to care.

Edward is backing away in horror from whatever he sees in her mind, and Jasper is helping her stand, returning to their place amongst the very confused witnesses - what could the diminutive vampire say to the Lords of Volterra that would inspire such a response. The three are summarily executed without ceremony, and they are scattered over the fire without reverence.

Alice tosses the hair clasp in, too. It is better to be burnt to nothing, to be forgotten and buried by dirt and ash. It is too close to becoming a cursed object, one that will follow them, if they place too much belief and trust and hope into it. It has witnessed two downfalls, and it will never witness another.

He holds her tight in the aftermath, as they count their dead and make their plans. Edward is already whispering warnings into Carlisle’s ear, of the shape their thoughts and memories take. But they are family, and that comes before everything else.

(It’s not exactly their fault that Edward is a shiny new soul, and it’s going to take him a few lifetimes to understand what he’s seeing and hearing. Harder especially for him, with his gift so strong so early in the cycle. But everything happens for a reason.)

Despite the curiosity wafting off everyone, they say nothing and they go… well, not home, but to the closest residence, the headquarters of this war. A sprawling property with enough beds for the wounded, the wolves, and the lovers.

That’s where she makes good on her unspoken promises from eons again, of their private victory celebration. She sits astride him, her hips rolling hard against his, drawing out his groans and growls as he grips her thighs almost tight enough to crack. Their gazes are locked the entire time, her tongue skimming over her lips, as she lets her emotions tell him everything that she wants and everything she plans to take.

He remembers fucking her in the dirt in Dacia; his mouth between her legs as she hollered obscenities in a Paris attic; and the urgent, passionate loving-making of a marriage finally consummated.

She remembers bloody emeralds looped around her throat and resting between her breasts as she gets down on her knees and takes him into her mouth, his fingers tangled in her hair; the delicious weight of him on top of her, their sweat mingling and cooling in the frozen night as their flimsy bed creaked against the wall; and his soft encouragement in her ear as he grasps her around the waist, their hands resting together on the gentle swell of her stomach.

It is times like this that their talents are burdens and gifts both because it is so much, so very much, and in all that passion and true love, there is also loss and regret.

But they have each other, and they will weather this new storm together.

—

They are hardly the only couple to spend the night tumbling together, but they must be the loudest, because when they reappear the next morning with darkened eyes and clean clothes, Jacob and Emmett are looking at Jasper with a new and very specific kind of respect, and if she flips both of them off behind Esme’s back, no one has any proof.

They don’t talk about what they’ve learnt, because it probably wouldn’t mean anything to anyone else. It doesn’t make sense, doesn’t matter, until the mantle of it settles upon you. And then it is everything.

Instead, they hunt. They have won the battle, won the war, and whilst rebuilding will take time, they can take this small moment to feast with their family and relish freedom from fear.

She truly doesn’t know what comes next. He truly doesn’t know if it will be good or bad. They will live this life for as long as it lasts, long may it last, surrounded by the people they love and trust.

And then they will die.

And then they will live again. Maybe they will live another ten lives, maybe another one hundred. Maybe one day they will cross paths with their family again, or they will choose to have children again. Maybe they will be long lives full of joy and laughter, maybe they will burn out fast and hard, but full of feeling.

But the thing they are now both and utterly certain of, above all else, is that they will walk each step hand-in-hand.

It is simply the way of things.

#jaliceweek20 #alice cullen #jasper hale #twilight renaissance #twilight fic #jalice #jalice fic #my fic: the way of things

[rulesofthebeneath]

Hey guys!! 

Here’s the new thing I’ve been writing! I hope y’all enjoy lmao this started as a dumb idea but now I’ve been really emotionally invested in it. I’m gonna try to post about twice a week. Let me know what you think, please!!! Tags: @abunchofbadchoices, @mrsbhandari, @lilmissperfectlyimperfect 

The first time he’d ever told anyone, it was his first boyfriend, and he was met with a sarcastic snort.

“Come on, ‘Jay. That’s just what gay guys say when they’re scared to come out all the way. You can’t be both gay and straight, you have to choose.”

He was fourteen, and had no idea what to make of any of his feelings, much less the weird ones that made his heart beat faster and made butterflies storm his stomach. So he accepted that, and listened to Jake, who was older and wiser than him.

“Are you sure?” he’d asked.

“Yeah. Wait, ‘Jay, do you not like me anymore?”

“What? Of course I do.”

“Oh, good. I was scared you were trying to break up. But I don’t know why you’d say something as crazy as that. You know you can always talk to me, okay?”

Ajay nodded, but deep inside he sincerely doubted that. In retrospect, it was the first of several red flags that had led to a less-than-happy ending for him and Jake.

The next people he told were his parents. As far as Indian parents went, they were pretty open-minded, and hadn’t really cared about him liking guys. He’d even been able to bring home boyfriends or school dance dates without making too many waves with his parents. They didn’t really understand why he couldn’t just date a nice girl, but they loved him anyways, and he knew he was lucky.

But when he’d said he liked both guys and girls, he was met with polite parental confusion.

“What? But you only go out with boys, putra,” his mom had said. “You’ve never brought a girl home. How do you know you like both, hm?”

It was an excellent point. Ajay couldn’t explain how he knew he liked girls, just like he couldn’t explain why he liked guys. But he just did.

His father shook his head. “No, no, no. You’ll have to choose someday. You don’t have to hide yourself and pretend you like girls just to make us happy. You know we love you.”

Ajay hadn’t even known how to respond to that one, so he’d just nodded and excused himself from dinner. He’d never brought it up again.

He’d posted anonymously on a forum for gay youth that he’d found, but hadn’t recieved much other than “that’s not real”, “you can’t like both”, “you have to choose”, “so you’re a cheater?” and “you’re just saying that because you’re scared of committing to life as a gay guy”.

It wasn’t long before he’d just logged out completely, questioning himself. Did he just think he was attracted to girls because he felt like he had to be? Because society said guys were supposed to like girls? Was it true that he was scared of being gay, because of all the homophobia he’d have to face? Especially as a second-generation Indian, he was expected to life the perfect heterosexual American lifestyle, getting a good job and having two or three kids and making his family back in India proud of their success story. Even though his parents knew he was gay and didn’t care, nobody else in his family knew. He hated to think what they’d say about him if they did. They already talked smack about Ajay’s only openly gay cousin, Aditya, and Ajay knew he was basically dead to the family.

So was he just pretending he liked girls to escape the full ramifications of being gay? It was possible, he thought, but probably not. He’d never had a girlfriend or even been on a date with a girl, but that was due to an unfortunate outing incident orchestrated by his ex (another of those red flags he’d ignored).

Despite the fact that he was outed, though, he’d found a group of friends who had thoroughly supported him. Rory, in all of their genderfluid nonbinary aro/ace glory, Clint and Natalie whose sexualities seemed to be oriented towards whichever gender Rory presented as on a given day, Skye who was a goth sapphic icon, James who was the token straight ally, Trevor who was so deep in the closet that Ajay doubted he’d come out this century, then two mysteries.

One was Erin, Ajay’s longtime best friend. He knew she liked guys, but he didn’t know if she only liked guys or if she liked other genders too. He wasn’t about to ask, though, because asking her would lead to her asking him, and he wasn’t quite prepared for that.

The other was Grace, James’ twin sister. As far as James was known as a heartbreaker, Grace didn’t appear to have dated anybody. Or at least, she didn’t talk about it and neither James nor Rory, who’d known her since childhood, said anything about it either. And again, he wasn’t about to ask because of the possibility of the awkward return question.

All his friends would pick on him, good-naturedly, about just how gay he was– how he always dressed sharp, his hair was always neatly combed and occasionally slicked back with gel, how he liked theatre way more than a straight guy could ever, the fact that he couldn’t do math, how his best friend was a girl, his taste for iced lattes, his distaste for anything athletic. Erin had even caught him doing a facemask one morning, and had teased the living hell out of him for it. Ajay didn’t see the big deal– he just wanted to keep his skin clear– but was willing to accept that basic hygiene and skincare were not something that straight men typically did.

It was all in good fun, and Ajay knew that, and he would even laugh along with his friends when they pointed that stuff out. It was funny, he could admit that. And he was gay— that was the only part of his sexuality that was easy for him to admit. He’d found comfort in that label, even though it wasn’t the full story.

In all honesty, he was scared to be openly bisexual. Coming out as gay to his parents after being forcibly outed at school was the hardest thing he’d ever had to do, and he couldn’t imagine doing it again. And how would he explain that he liked both guys and girls? He’d seen what they said on TV and in the movies, even in some books. Bisexuals are promiscuous, bisexuals are cheaters, all bisexuals choose to be either gay or straight eventually. It’s just a phase.

In previous years, in weaker moments, he’d wished he could just be gay. After a particularly disastrous encounter with a girl named Kelly and his very unfortunate crush on her, he’d cursed himself for liking girls when everyone knew he was gay. He tried to convince himself to be gay, to just only like guys, but it never took.

It never took, and it was one of the reasons he resented Rory, who was unapologetically themself. Rory didn’t care what people said, and either way they weren’t interested in dating. Rory had it good, anyways. They had parents who loved them, accepted them unconditionally, and had even thrown them a coming out party. They were just a far braver person than Ajay was, and Ajay wished he could have their accepting family and their confidence and just be who he was.

Ajay sat down heavily at the lunch table, having gotten there surprisingly early. Rory sat there, picking at their lunch absent-mindedly while scrolling through their phone. Grace sat beside them, twirling her hair around her finger and completely ignoring her lunch in favor of staring at something across the cafeteria. Ajay followed her line of sight but only saw the new poster advertising their spring musical, The Tempest.

Grace had snagged the lead role of Miranda after making her high school theatre debut as the lead in their fall play. It was her sophomore year, after she and her brother transferred from a school in Seattle when her parents decided to move back to their hometown and start their own business, a small diner called the Golden Griddle. Grace herself was an impressive actor, and even though Ajay didn’t want to admit it, she was an impressive person as well.

She turned her head as if snapping out of a trance, looking towards Ajay.

“Hey,” she greeted him. “Just checking out the new posters. I didn’t see them before.”

That’s right, Ajay reminded himself. Of course she might not have seen them until now. She had been noticeably absent from rehearsal yesterday, where Skye and Mr. Olsen had presented the new posters and the entire group had spent the last half-hour putting them up all over the school. It hadn’t been a huge deal- there were plenty of scenes that needed blocking, and Ajay had just had Skye stand in for Grace where it was needed. But he couldn’t pretend he wasn’t concerned, especially since he’d seen her twin heading home from soccer practice.

“Yeah, we put them up during rehearsal yesterday.”

“About that,” she started, looking uneasy. “I’m sorry I didn’t come to rehearsal yesterday. I… wasn’t feeling well, and I had to go home early.”

Ajay furrowed his brows. Grace looked so uncomfortable while she was saying that that it was obvious it was a lie, or at least not the entire truth. He wanted to ask her about it, but then James loudly sat down beside her, chatting with Erin, and he dropped it. Grace looked relieved at her brother’s interruption. Ajay shook it off– it didn’t really matter anyways. But he was worried all the same.

“Stop pouting,” Erin interjected,shooting him a ferocious glare. He was so surprised that the frown slipped off his face, causing the whole table to break out into giggles. Even Grace, which eased the worry a little. He shot a fake glare Erin’s way, then had to dodge another glare.

Skye, Natalie, Clint and Trevor showed up not long after, and Rory finally looked up from their phone.

“Hey,” they said. “How was everyone’s morning?”

Skye groaned. “Math test. Kill me now, before my parents see my grades.”

Grace rolled her eyes. “You know you got this, Skye. You knew everything on that test when we were studying last night.”

“Test anxiety is a bitch, though,” Trevor added. He prodded Skye’s shoulder. “I get it. We can’t all be the modern-day Einstein.”

“I resent that,” Grace mumbled, though a small smile remained on her face.

“I signed up to take the SAT at the end of the year,” Erin interjected. “I’m starting SAT prep tutoring this weekend. Three hours on both days.

The entire table except Ajay cringed. “Me too,” he admitted. “I’m gonna need a lot of help if I want a good score on the math section. I can’t make heads or tails of some of this trig stuff.”

Privately, he’d been thinking of asking Grace to help him out after rehearsal. She was already helping Skye on weekends, and though he couldn’t pay her like Skye’s parents could, he thought he’d offer to buy her dinner if she agreed. But that thought remained stuck inside his head, some part of him inexplicably nervous about being alone with her.

While he was caught up in his thoughts, wondering why the girl made him nervous and furiously trying to ignore that part of him, the conversation at the table had continued on without him. James jabbed Grace with his elbow and she jabbed him back. Erin and Rory talked about the college application process, Erin admitting that she wouldn’t be trying for any BFA Drama programs. Clint and Natalie hung on to Rory’s every word, echoing their indignation that Erin wouldn’t pursue drama in higher education. Skye and Trevor talked about set design, Skye even whipping out her sketchbook to add in some details.

By the time Ajay regained attention of the conversation around him, triggered by Erin asking him about that week’s rehearsal schedule, Grace had already zoned back out of the conversation, staring at the poster again. Ajay frowned again. What was up with her?

“Earth to Ajay”, Erin said. “We were arguing over which team was better, softball or soccer. What do you think?”

Ajay quirked an eyebrow. “Erin, I don’t do sports.”

“I don’t know why not. They’re fun! Even just to watch.”

“You know full well I have a complete aversion to any physical activity. But I guess if I had to choose, I’d say soccer.”

Erin nodded knowingly, a smirk playing on her lips. “I can see that. Scoping out the hot guys, are we?”

Ajay sighed “Sure,” he said, trying to sound as defeated as possible. Erin knew how he’d dated Jake a while ago, and he was now the team captain in his senior year at Berry. Erin had a theory that he still held a torch for the guy, though, which couldn’t be further from the truth. The only games he went to anymore were the ones that the whole theatre group went to with Grace to support James. Even though James wasn’t cast in the musical, he was an honorary part of the crew, having stepped in with his calm demeanor during various theatre emergencies. Everyone liked the guy– it was impossible not to– and they made up the loudest group on the bleachers cheering for him.

The only reason Ajay still liked soccer was because it was the only sport he understood. Jake had made sure he’d known everything about soccer, talking about it constantly. Ajay knew his ex planned to play pro soccer in Europe after graduation. Ajay had grown into a soft spot for the game that didn’t end when his relationship with Jake had.

The bell rang to signal that lunch was over, and everyone got up except Ajay and Grace. Ajay, because he was still reeling over the exchange, and Grace, because she was still lost in space, staring at that poster.

“Hey,” he said to her, barely able to make himself heard over the chatter in the cafeteria. “You okay?”

Grace’s eyes snapped to Ajay’s, looking startled for a half-second. “Oh, yeah, just distracted,” she said unconvincingly. She started to gather her stuff, and Ajay echoed her.

He fell into the crowd beside her, trying to make their way through into the hallway. Ajay screwed up all his courage to ask her about tutoring, because he really did need that extra math help.

“Hey, so, I was wondering if you’d be able to help me with my math stuff? I’ll be working on the SAT problems on the weekends but I’m falling dangerously behind in class again. I can’t really pay you but I can buy you dinner or something?”

Grace looked over, a little surprised. “Oh, yeah, sure. You don’t need to buy me dinner, though. I don’t charge my friends.”

“You don’t? But don’t Skye’s parents pay you?”

Grace looked a little embarrassed. “They insisted, and I tried to resist but Skye told me it was just a drop in the bucket for them. So really, I don’t need anything.”

“If you’re sure,” Ajay said. “But if there is anything I can do to repay you, I’ll do it.”

Grace paused for a moment. “Um… if you could help me with English it would be great. I don’t know what any of these old British writers are saying.”

“Sure, that stuff can be hard to digest. Sounds like a good deal for me.”

“Alright. Think we could hit up a coffee shop or a fast food place or something, say twice a week after rehearsal?”

Ajay nodded. “Thanks, Grace.”

“No, thank you,” she smiled. “See you at rehearsal.” Then she ducked her head and disappeared into the crowd.

#ajay x mc #ajay bhandari #hssca #high school story class act #choices #playchoices #choices fanfic #hssca fanfic #my fanfic

[feuilly-cakes]

New Moon - Review - 3*

The problem with first-person narration is that when the main character is in distress you can't have fun reading the book, because everything is coloured with that viewpoint. As a result, I was more annoyed by this than I needed to be, because of the way Bella changed and also Edward's actions. It did, however, do some cool things too, in the way of important messages and descriptions of poor mental health, and also what it's like to begin to recover from that. So this was less enjoyable than Twilight, but not less important to read. Spoilers beyond this point Bella starts off on a high note, with a new-ish job at the Newton's shop and a close relationship with Edward and Alice, who are both friendly or even besties with Charlie in Alice's case. She's living the dream, and then the birthday party happens, and it all goes downhill. Edward is acting strange and indifferent to Bella, Bella is freaking out about that because she's a smart cookie and thinks he's going to ask her to leave with him, and then suddenly she's dumped, depressed, and hallucinating Edward's voice. It's not a great time for Bella. This whole experience makes her change from a strong, funny, normal girl to a selfish, hypocritical girl with zero self esteem or self preservation. As character growth goes it's not nice but it is realistic and it needed to be that way to further the plot. Let me be clear: she is still all the Bella things of the first book, but it's hidden away behind the depression and desperation and the way she can't think rationally anymore. I want to talk about Edward now, because I now think he's trash and am firmly on #teamjacob for the first time in my life. Edward is so pitiful here that he literally dumps her on the trail to some woods like a moron and then runs away and never expects her to, I don't know, follow him? He didn't think she would be too hurt by him rejecting her either because "how could you let one word break your faith in me?" I don't know Edward, perhaps because it was you that said those words? Also that's very 'let's blame Bella for my actions' of you... but I digress. After he's back he even tells Bella he "was coming back anyway" and "it was only a matter of time." Sir, if you're going to abruptly dump your girlfriend of 6 months and not so much as check in on her, then at least have the willpower to stick to that, because if this were a normal story you'd have gotten punched in the face the minute you showed up. The only saving grace for his character in this book is when Bella uses logic on him to get him to see he has hope for his own soul after all, and he begins to really come around to changing her, so there may be hope for him after all. The Werewolves I'm not going to talk about Jacob much because nothing massive stood out to me, just know that I love him and he should've been with Bella. The way he let her know he was into her and then remained her friend without pushing unless she did something was lovely, and I truly believe that if Edward hadn't been come back it would've been a perfect sequel. I am already expecting that to change in Eclipse because of the thing that he's going to do. Anyway, I also love the pack and wish we got more time with them. They call each other "brothers" and I just wanted some found family goodness and got nothing. I also wish we had gotten more interactions between Bella and Emily, because Bella starts calling herself a "wolf girl" and hanging out with Emily but we don't see that and it's so frustrating. I need a whole book dedicated to what exactly she was doing when she was spending all of her time at La Push. The Vampires. The Volturi are finally named in the scene where Romeo and Juliet is used to foreshadow the whole book. They are also used to foreshadow the rest of the book. Later we discover that they are a family of 5, with 9 main guard members plus an unknown number that changes. This is the information I always wanted to know but never did. Aro has "clouded, milky" red eyes, and "papery" skin. It isn't clear if this is from age or something else, but it kind of creeped me out I'm not going to lie. He also goes on a little tangent about how it "pleases" him that Carlisle was successful in being a vegetarian. This could have been a lie, but remember that Edward is a mind reader and would have given some indication. I actually like him in this book, he's very friendly and as soon as he gets confirmation Bella will be changed he's content to leave them be, though is a bit wistful that they won't join him. Caius is the one who tells them they have a time limit. Onto the big differences from the film -The Romeo and Juliet scene takes place in Bella's living room instead of the English classroom. As does the second half of the Volturi explanation scene, the first half of which took place in the first book. -Bella knows something is going to happen with Edward before he takes her on the walk. -The motorbike scene in Port Angeles isn't a motorbike scene, it's a walking towards dangerous men then leaving scene. -Bella and Jacob go hiking together to find the meadow, and Bella finds it on her own after all that hiking practice. -The werewolf reveal scene where Bella smacks Paul doesn't happen. Bella and Jacob deliberately meet them somewhere, Bella doesn't smack anyone, and Paul loses it anyway. -Jacob gets a grounded Bella in further trouble by showing Charlie the motorbikes they rose together many times, not just once. Parts I actually liked, because it wasn't all bad. -Bella stands up to Edward about her truck stereo in the beginning. It was a good moment. -Bella says that the birthday incident wasn't Jasper's fault at all. -A funny moment: (when Sam Uley introduces himself less than a year after she met him on First Beach:) "There was nothing familiar about his name." (And yes, I checked and she definitely met him, age 19, never learned how to read...) - Chapter 6: Friends. The whole page where Jacob and Bella are giggling and tripping over themselves and each other had me beaming. Such a happy section. -"I wanted to be fierce and deadly. Someone no one would dare mess with. Someone who would scare Sam Uley silly. I wanted to be a vampire." -There's a part during the voting scene where Edward grabs Bella by the face and she's talking to Carlisle and hoping he will understand because it was hard to talk properly the way Edward was holding her face. The mental image I got... he was squeezing her cheeks to the point she was doing fish lips and it nearly had me in tears. -Also with the voting scene, Rosalie votes against Bella, but she has no aversion to being her sister, only a vampire. Bella then tells everyone she feels the same about them as they do as her, which hurts Rosalie, and Bella realises that could be taken the wrong way. She didn't mean it in a bad way and the fact that Rosalie got hurt shows how their relationship is already developing from the first book. I found this part interesting and lovely to see, as I used to see it as a very abrupt friendship in book 4. There was no outright offensive language in this book, however there were several instances of questionable and uncomfortable behaviour, so I'll be listing them below. -When telling her about the birthday arrangements Edward and Alice don't listen to her protests, and pretty much force her into going to a party she doesn't want. It's creepily reminiscent of the prom incident, only with much worse results. -The Port Angeles post-cinema scene. Bella endangers her own and Jessica's life just to hear a hallucination of Edward. She then decided they were "probably nice guys. Safe." and just walked away, after realising they weren't the same men who wanted to r*pe her in book 1. She then thinks that Jessica is upset because she "must have really offended her" and not because she risked her life and well-being on a whim. The whole mindset Bella is in here is obviously not a healthy one, and I think we as readers are supposed to understand that and empathise with Jessica, but I can't be sure, and either way it's really bad and reckless behaviour. -Bella describes Leah as "exotic" which is not only weird but incorrect. Leah is native american and therefore the opposite of exotic. Leah isn't an animal, she isn't unusual or from far away, she's a person living in the place she was born, and it's beyond weird to call a person 'exotic'. -Jacob is back at it with the weird hatred of his own tribe. Pre-werewolf anyway. Before I get into it, I'd like to remind you that Jacob is not a real Native American because he was written by a WHITE woman, and therefore anything he says is a reflection of Stephenie Meyer and not of an actual Native American person. Now that's out of the way, Jacob is telling Bella about Sam Uley's behaviour, and while doing so he says this: "They're all about our land, and tribe pride... it's getting ridiculous." In the context of the book only, he's talking about how Sam's pack (though he doesn't know it's a pack yet) have become "protectors" and he thinks it's weird. In the context of who the author is, however, it's a bit more complicated. This line makes it seems like Stephenie Meyer may believe having lots of pride in your tribe as a native american person is ridiculous, and it skirts a dangerous territory. Remember she is a white woman and who clearly hasn't done research into why native american people are protective of what little land they have left and what culture hasn't been taken from them through genocide. This is your reminder to seek out native american voices, and especially Quileute voices in this circumstance, and learn their opinions and views on these matters. -Quileute is described as "an unfamiliar, liquid language." I couldn't find any video or audio of this language except the alphabet, and so I very much doubt Stephenie Meyer found something 14 years ago. It's my opinion that just like with the legends, she made this up and slapped the Quileute name on it for exploitative reasons. From what research I've done no young person would've known the language fluently anyway because it was dying before 2000 and is barely being kept alive. It wasn't hard to find this out, and as someone who was set to make millions off this book she should have done her research. -Bella's attitude regarding Gianna. She's horrified by her desire to become one of the Volturi, to be surrounded by vampires, and it doesn't seem to click that Bella herself has that same desire with the Cullens. She looks down on Gianna just because the vampires she desires are human drinkers and not animal drinkers, and it's clear she doesn't think of them as the same. All of the Cullens have killed humans or drank from them, so Bella is extremely hypocritical here. -"I mean, 'Fine, I'll move out.'" Bella holds this ultimatum over Charlie's head when he doesn't want her seeing Edward. She's being selfish and childish here, not caring that he's trying to look after her. When Edward left she was ruined, and Charlie is trying to stop that from happening again. Her actions in this scene are horrible and show how little she cares for Charlie, the man who looked after her while she was broken, who is her father. This is where we truly see how selfish Bella has become over the course of the book, or perhaps since being in a relationship with Edward, as in Twilight she would have never said this to Charlie. She may be an adult but she is sure acting like a child. -Finally, the vote. After it takes place, Bella demands Alice turn her immediately, and refuses to listen to reason when Alice tells her she can't just do it right away. She then turns to Carlisle, putting him right on the spot, and demands the same. He agrees but it's not right or proper behaviour, but unfortunately it's behaviour we come to expect from Bella by the end of the book. The switch from vote to demanding she be changed was jarring, and it really rubbed me the wrong way.

#twilight #book review #twilight renaissance #book blogger #book rec #team jacob

[turning-dreams-into-chaos]

Kissed

*Not My Gif*

Request: Can I get a Young Sirius x Reader pls!!?? Love your writing, it’s so good!

Requested by: Anonymous

Paring: Sirius Black X Reader (Marauders Era)

Word Count: 2600

Post Date: 5-12-19

A/N: Hi Guys! I feel like this week I’ve posted a lot and I really hope I keep going with this next week! So please my friends, send in requests if you want! I know I promised I would post a second part to Rain, Rain, Go away today or tomorrow, so I promise I’ll get that posted tomorrow! Anyways, I hope you guys enjoy this and anon I hope this is want you wanted! Feedback is always welcomed! Enjoy!

- Ria

Warnings: Implied Smut but not actual smut

~Master List~

~Open Requests~

He kissed her. James kissed Lily.

You just wanted a quiet afternoon by the pond to study, grabbing your bag and spare parchments before making your way. You could’ve invited your friends, but you knew Sirius was probably shagging some girl, Remus hated studying with you because you would always mumble incoherent words, and you couldn’t stand Peter. So that just left James. You liked James. You really liked James. And you knew it would’ve been dangerous for you to be alone with him because you might’ve said something stupid and embarrassed yourself, but you also wanted to hang out with the brown-haired boy. Shaking your head and ignoring the butterflies in your stomach at inviting him, you continued your way to the pond for some alone time. But sadly, someone was already there, and they weren’t alone. You watched as the same boy who occupied your thoughts earlier was now snogging your last best friend, Lily Evans.

He kissed her. James kissed Lily.

Feeling your throat go dry and tears begin to cloud your sight, you quickly made your way back to the castle, avoiding the worried glances of the students and classmates you passed as you made your way up to your common room. You threw your bag onto your bed before shrugging off your robes, tears streaming down your face. It was stupid to be so upset over this, he was just a boy. A boy who caused your brain to go crazy when he smiled at you or threw his arm around your shoulder when you both were laughing at his latest prank on Serverus, but you couldn’t help how you felt. You knew you couldn’t just sit here and cry, someone could walk in and you would’ve been even more embarrassed than you are right now, pining over a boy you knew you could never have. Deciding you needed some air, you threw your robes back on, grab a few bottles of some fire-whiskey Sirius had saved you all, and made your way up to the Astronomy tower.

Your tears had stopped as you drowned a bottle of the liquid, loving the feeling of it cascading down your once dry throat. Throwing the bottle behind you and grabbing another, you hadn’t expected a hand to block yours, causing you to let out a whine as they pulled it away. Looking up, you caught sight of the long black-haired boy who had opened the bottle and took a few sips himself before joining you on the ground.

“What are doing here, love? What sorrows are currently drowning now?” he says, smirking as you grab the bottle back and swallow some more. You roll your eyes as you laid down, staring out in the sky before you.

“How did you find me Padfoot? And how much longer until you’ll leave?” you snap earning a chuckle from the now slightly drunk boy who opened yet another bottle, your last bottle.

“I used the map, Love. How else do you think I would’ve?” he joined you in your stares as a silence fell upon the two of you. You wanted him to leave, but you enjoy the company, of having someone next to you. You didn’t know what had happened but the next minute you could feel the warm gentle tears fall once more, painting your cheeks. When Sirius noticed this, he pulled you up and right into his arms, holding your head into his chest as he rubbed your back, telling you it’s going to be alright. When pulled apart you let out a chuckle at his now wet sweater. He wiped your cheeks as you took another swig of the drink.

“Thanks, Pads. I needed that.” You whisper, refusing to look up into his eyes. He gave you a small nod as he watched your fingers fumble with your robes. He felt bad, he didn’t know what had caused you to act like this, but he was worried. You were one of his best friends, practically a marauder yourself, and he didn’t like the fact that someone could’ve done this to you.

“Do you want to talk about it? I don’t know what happened, but it can’t be good.” You finally looked up at him, your (e/c) eyes shining in the moonlight. You just looked at him, your tears having slowed but not stopped. After a minute you decided that it would’ve been a great idea to let someone in, even if it was one of his and your best friends.

“I fancied James. I really fancied him. but I didn’t tell him. And I knew he fancied Lily, but I just never thought that they would, you know, do anything. But tonight, when I went to the pond I saw them. He kissed her. James kissed Lily. I knew that I wasn’t going to end up with him. He’s James freaking Potter for crying out loud! But I just… I don’t know… I thought I had a chance. I didn’t.” your gaze had shifted out to the sky, but Sirius’ had remained on you, fixated on the redness in your puffy eyes, and the wetness on your face. “It was stupid of me to think that. I’m just me. Stupid little me who refused to tell a guy she fancied him! I understand why they’re together, I mean, she’s beautiful. She’s smart, funny, knows how to make him laugh and smile. I’m not any of that.”

“Don’t say that Y/N. You’re more than that. You’re the one who’s funny, who’s always getting amazing grades, showing up even Remus, making all of us laugh, even me, and most importantly…” he starts before both of you finish off the last of the fire-whiskey in your bottles, he gently pulls your chin up so you face him, “… no matter what, you’re insanely beautiful, no matter what you think. You deserve to be happy, so don’t be sad over a git like him.” he whispers to you and at that moment you realized just how close you two were, noses just barely touching as your eyes meet. You could feel the alcohol in your system and smell it on both of your breaths, but you didn’t care. Your eyes had flickered down to his lips then back up to his eyes, catching the few seconds of his eyes on your lips. Your body seemed to act on impulse as you found both of your mouths meeting, eyes flickering closed as you shared an alcohol filled moment. You pull away, panting as your noses brush once again, your eyes had opened to see his, darkened with arousal looking at you. You pull him up, his figure towering over you. You got on your tippy toes, your mouth hovering over his ear, his hands grabbing your waist, your warm breath causing a shiver to go down his spine. His last words echoing in your head like a chant. ‘Don’t be sad over a git like him.’

“Make me feel something else.” You whispered before pulling away, grabbing his hand and both of you dashing towards the Gryffindor common room, to drunk to care about the people shouting at you both as you knocked them out of the way. Arriving at the common room, Sirius led you up to the boy’s room, somehow knowing all the boys were going to be gone until morning. He turned around, looking down at your huffing figure before pulling you in for another sloppy drunk kiss.

“Are you sure about this Y/N?” All it took was a slight nod of your head before he leaned down again and picked you up, your legs wrapping around his waist as he brought you both onto his bed. His lips moved from yours onto your neck, leaving a few opened mouthed kisses and bruises as you both throw off your clothes, eliciting a moan from your lips at the contact. Just like that, the thoughts of James left your mind, and the only thoughts now are of him. Sirius Black.

The next morning you didn’t wake up from the sun coming in through your curtains, or your roommates nudging you that you were going to be late for class. No, you woke up laying on top of Sirius, your head resting on his chest as it raised up and down, his arm on your back pulling you into his body as yours draped across his body, legs tangled underneath his sheets. But you also woke up to your 3 other best friends, freaking out at the sight of you and Sirius, obviously naked under the sheets, cuddling into each other.

“Sirius and Y/N?! How did we not know about this Moony! Pads! Pads, wake up!” you heard James voice boom while your headache starts screaming at you. You start stirring as Sirius does underneath you, pulling the blanket up to cover both your bodies.

“Prongs, keep it down and get out. It’s to early and I’m sure neither one of us wants to have this conversation with you.” Sirius says as he rubs his forehead. You roll off his body as you look at your friends, still to tired and hungover to deal with this. As each of the boys take glances between the two of you, you couldn’t help the blush that spread to your neck. You looked at Sirius who was already watching for your reaction. You gave him a small smile before turning back to the boys.

“All right boys. Close your eyes or turn around so I can change please.” You say with a confident smirk even though it was the exact opposite of what you were feeling. Each of the boys turned around on their own time, Remus being the gentlemen he was turned around as soon as you asked, Peter giving you a wink turned around soon after, but James just continued to stare between you and Sirius, brows furrowed at the sight of the two of you. he finally turned around when Sirius cleared his throat, causing you to chuckle and James gulped, turning around faster than you thought possible. When you turned to Sirius you couldn’t help but smile at his also smiling face, eyes closed. You quickly got up and threw on your clothes, not noticing when Sirius took a little peep when you bent over to pick up your pants, with only your underwear on. When you were done, you told the boys they could turn around before you gave them an awkward wave and left them there, watching as your retreating figure.

“You slept with Y/N?! Mate, how could you have been so stupid? She’s our best friend!” James practically screamed, his arms thrown about in emphasis. Sirius let out a loud huff at his reaction before lying back in his bed, staring at the spot you left. He turned back towards his friends grabbing a pair of underwear and slipping them on.

“Oh, that’s rich coming from you mate. We were drunk, she was upset over… some git, and things just happened, Prongs. Didn’t mean for it too.” Sirius couldn’t tell them the exact reason they did it, he couldn’t do that to you. James just laughed, running his hand through his hair before pacing back and forth in the room. Peter couldn’t stop laughing at the situation, but when both James and Sirius glared at him he scurried out of the room. James’ head was spinning, he had a crush on you and Lily, and yesterday he kissed Lily. But it wasn’t what he wanted. You were, and he now he knew that. And seeing you with Sirius, well he couldn’t tell you now, could he. Giving the black-haired boy one last glance, he walked out of the room, following Peter’s laughter into the common room. Leaving Remus and Sirius alone to talk.

“Pads. Y/N? I thought… I thought you were over her.” Remus said, causing Sirius to stop getting dress and stare at the floor. He knew what he was talking about. Remus knew all about Sirius’ feelings for you. The ones that he knew you didn’t reciprocate, and the conversation last night just convinced him even more. Sirius fancied you since your third year, since you ruined the prank that he had planned on Snape, causing yourself to get caught in the crossfire, and you unable to contain your laughter at the situation. That’s when he realized he liked you, in a more than friend kind of way. Remus figured it out soon after that and now, three years later, he’s decided to tell Sirius he knows.

“You know? How the bloody hell did you know?” Sirius whispered in shock walking closer to Remus, who only laughed at his expression.

“Padfoot, you’ve been in love with her since third year, it was so bloody obvious I couldn’t believe Y/N didn’t catch on.” Sirius’ expression never changed during this time. “So, this bloke who broke her heart, who was it?” Remus says as he plops down on his bed, opening a book before hearing Sirius groan.

“Prongs. It was Prongs.” Remus’ face drops. There was no way that Y/N liked James, he would’ve known. Right? Sirius shook his head at the truth. You didn’t like him, you liked Prongs, and you only slept with him because you were upset. He didn’t want to talk anymore, he tried to rub his headache away a little more before getting dressed and heading down to breakfast with Moony.

When he got to the dinning hall, his eyes immediately scanned for you, quickly finding you reading a book at the end of the table, a smile gracing your lips as you bit into an apple. You lifted your eyes when you felt someone’s stares, only to see Sirius staring at you from across the room. You couldn’t help the blush that spread from his gaze. You gave him a smile, your eyes refusing to break the eye contact formed. Sirius made his way over to you, Remus following suit. A few minutes after they sat down, James, Lily, and Peter had joined. Your shoulders tensed as you saw Lily and James together, but when you felt Sirius’ hand on your back you relaxed and looked at him, giving him a silent nod, but yet again you didn’t look away. Just continued to stare at him. Him. Sirius Black. When Remus cleared his throat you looked away, your cheeks redden when Remus raised his eyes at the two of you. Glaring at him, you returned your attention to your food, completely unaware of James’ casual glances in your direction. The only person you were aware of glancing at you was Sirius, and for some reason you didn’t mind, and for some other reason you returned them, smiling.

James was a boy, a boy who had caused your brain to go crazy when he smiled at you or threw his arm around your shoulder when you both were laughing at his latest prank on Serverus, and you couldn’t help how you felt. But Sirius. Sirius was a boy who made you feel special, feel loved, feel insanely beautiful, and you liked it. You liked him. you liked who you were with him. You wanted Sirius, not James. You didn’t love James, and you didn’t care because you were in love with Sirius, Sirius Black. James couldn’t help the feeling in his stomach as he watched you two. He knew you were going to be happy with Sirius. And he knew he didn’t have you because he kissed her. James kissed Lily.

Feedback is welcomed! Thanks everyone! ♥️

#sirius black #sirius black x reader #sirius x reader #sirius black imagine #James Potter X Reader #james potter #remus lupin #peter pettigrew #hogwarts #hogwarts imagine #padfoot #padfoot x reader #the marauders #the marauders x reader #harry potter