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kkusuka · 3 years

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Aoba Johsai <3

team matserlist ----main matserlist

(so it turns out there are some other members of Seijoh that we never really see so I'm just going to the main group.)

Poor manager-chan was bothered by Oikawa for a full week before you gave up and became the manager

You already had a pretty vague understanding of the team, hell you went to Seijoh everyone knew about the volleyball team

After being cornered by Oikawa for the fourth time you just couldn’t take it anymore and just agreed to the poor boys begging.

Everyone on the team knew and was pleasantly surprised when you came with him

And even more, surprised when you announced that you would be the new manager!

(the team knew about you from Oikawa's constant chatter about y/n from his math class, the one with the pretty face and sits two rows in front of him.)

And when they saw you they could tell why you were just so magnetic

All of them wanted to be around you at once

And you were actually a really good manager, so that was helpful

You listened to them, took really detailed notes, had great team spirit, and you make hella good break time snacks

So it was really no surprise when some of the younger boys formed some little puppy dog crushes on you

And the ever-observant captain immediately noticed and was willing to talk to them about it

This led to multiple team meetings where it was discovered that all of them at one point would have loved to have you be theirs

With this revelation, Oikawa realized that he was not the only one who liked you, but he was going to be the one that got you.

So at practice, he was all over you, putting arms around your shoulder when the two of you spoke, and the final straw was the subtle kiss on the cheek

Oikawa had started a war

A war that came to head at one of the team dinners you were generously hosting

You had to mention how the recent days all the boys were kind of tense, and they would take every opportunity to be all over you, not that you minded but it was odd.

And they just unloaded everything on you...like everything including how you wearing a big shirt and shorts was not the best outfit to an all-boys-- and you--get -together

And somehow that turned into you indirectly, somehow daring almost all of them, it's confusing but it makes all of you happy so it’s ok

This wasn't the first time something like this had happened, it was a game day, of course, and some teams realize that they aren't going to win

And take a turn for the more vulgar route, mostly towards you

Just inappropriate comments across the court and makes everyone on your team lose their shit (for a lack of better terms)

This lead to two things: a win for Aoba Johsai, and a steamy rough fucking in the locker-room

Much to Oikawa's dismay: the younger boys start first, you don't want to tell them it’s because they prep you well and it easier to get rid of them first

Kunimi takes the opportunity to lay back and let you do most of the work. Much to the team's disbelief, it’s not entirely because he’s too lazy to do it himself; he likes watching you. You squeeze your eyes shut a lot, to which he loves to tell you to open them back up, if he was on top he would be too focused on moving to tell you that. And it means your boobs are bouncing right in his face too, he can't stop that one.

“Open ‘em, y/n, stop closing them”

“You can go faster, actually just go faster”

Kindaichi is actually always pretty hesitant, Kunimi is almost settled before he even has his hands on you. Two things can happen one easier than the other, the first is that he just tries to fit his dick in your already stuffed cunt. Or he’ll squeeze himself into your ass, which requires a bit more vocality from you to make sure he isn't hurting you. Then after some time he just reams whatever hole he’s in.

“Keep her steady-if you want to get off so bad move yourself” (they always argue)

“You-you feel so nice, I'm gonna fill you up”

After the first-years the only clear option is to let the second years have a turn, considering Kyotani is already on you before anyone can say different.

The team normally just lets Kyotani have his turn alone, he’s rather...aggressive- to say the least. He has a sort of ritual before staring, getting you on your back, missionary and he just attacks your thighs. The majority of the bite marks and hickeys come from him.

Then when he feels he’s left his mark, he flips you back onto your hands and knees and shoves himself into your dripping cunny. He's a big fan of hair-pulling and/or pushing your back until your stomach is on the floor but your ass is in the air, nonetheless speaking of the constant spanks.

(but he doesn't really talk all the much, mostly growls and lots of grunts)

When he finishes and finally lets you go, the other two second years take their turn.

Watari and Yahaba are significantly softer than the previous three, this time it's like an aftercare/ preparation for what's to come. Watari takes your mouth, telling you that any pace you want is fine and he’ll sit back. He’ll run your cheeks and give you soft mewls about how well you’re doing. Yahaba takes his chance to softly fuck your abused cunt, soft and slow strokes as he rubs little circles around your clit, making sure you cum.

“Just like that- oh you're so good”

“You’re doing so well honey, just a bit more, you can do it”

Then the real Armageddon begins.

Oikawa is on you in seconds, Iwaizumi following seconds behind.

Oikawa tries to stay on top but he only gets as far as marking up your neck before he’s pushed away. You both end up his chest, to your back, and your head falling over his shoulder as Iwaizumi takes his place. Oikawa-still marking up your neck enters your poor little hole and holds your legs open for Iwaizumi while rubbing your clit.

Hajime settles between your legs and maneuvers his penis around Oikawa you get himself in. He's the one who holds your hips and keeps you from jerking away, he’ll rub circles on your waist. And he’ll lean down taking one of your nipples in his mouth, then giving the same treatment to the other. Both of them are so in-sync it’s crazy. They also speak two different ways; Oikawa's praising moans compared to Iwaizumi degrading growls.

“You’re just a fucking cockwhore, you love this huh? You’re just a glorified cumdump and you love it”

“Oh, baby, you're squeezing me so well, and you sound so absolutely delicious.”

When the two of them let you go after cuddling you until you come back into reality, and they wouldn’t let you if not for Mattsun and Makki yelling about how they still have to go.

So when they get to you they waste no time, there is no foreplay everyone else has done for them. They are the most adventurous on the team, it seems like every time they have you they try something different. One time they both tried to fit in your ass, another they had you sit on Makkis face while Mattsun fucked your ass. But this time they seemed to settle for one in your pussy and the other in your ass.

Mattsun graciously took the place in your cunt, and he normally holds your ass open so Makki has a better view of your puckered hole. They always find a way to joke around like when Makki thrusts in he’ll jerk you into Mattsuns arms, then Mattsun thrusts back pushing you into Makki’s arms. They are also the meanest in retrospect. They jeer and make fun of you when you cry, they don't let you cum until they have to cum. But they never talk directly to you, they always have conversations with each other.

“Look Makki! Crying again? Really? We aren't doing anything bad, you’ll feel good in a minute if you stop feeling a baby.”

“You feel that Mattsun, should we let her cum, I don't think so she’s been bad, hasn't she? Well, maybe next time right!”

On the rare occasion, you immediately fall asleep after you wake up as they pamper you with food and bubble baths.

If not, you're carried around until you go to bed and waited for the next day. One time you even convinced them to go get food from a restaurant in an entirely different prefecture

It's a double reward- bomb sex and an entire team of boys waiting on your hand and foot. <3

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alecxaheart · 3 years

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Falls At 4419 | Bang Chan Oneshot

✎ Genre : Strangers to Lovers AU, Fluff

✎ Pairings : Bang Chan X Reader

✎ Word Count : 2.1k words

✎ Synopsis : Who could've thought that your ride to love life starts at a bus stop.

✎ Requested.

You had the usual tiring daily routine for the rest of your life. Your weekday mornings start with your alarm clock greeting you "good morning" in the most annoying beeping way as possible. What a gentle reminder, too, to tell you that it's almost time for work.

" Work again? " you groaned at the thought, hands reaching out to the bedside table to turn off the alarm. Once you did, you forced yourself out of the bed and start preparing for today.

You were completely exhausted due to the stack of work your boss gives you.

It's to the point that it made you sleep deprived, haggard or just messy in general. You don't even know if you ever managed to cover all of that, physically, with make-up. However, when it came to your words and actions, it's noticeable when one paid attention. It's a good thing that Ms. Han was blind to that, or else you'll be told that you're lacking and higher chances of you getting fired.

But aside from every negative thing about your occupation, so far your performances were praised by your co-workers. Salary has never been a problem, in fact, you've been paid higher than expected. Maybe it's from the plus being Ms. Han's pet-sitter — for the love of all things, it had to be a cat.

You're almost done preparing for work. With your feet taking a quick slip into your black heels, you're on your way out of the house. Clacking noises could be heard each time your heels meet the pavement.

As you were headed towards the bus stop, you felt something vibrating from your purse. Opening it, you found your phone ringing. The caller ID displays the name of your boss, Ms. Han. What could be the kind of good morning greeting I'll receive from her today?

You answered it and placed it to your right ear, immediately hearing your name. " Assistant (L/N) (Y/N)! " Ms. Han called out through the other line.

" Good morning to you too, Ms. Han. You have matters to discuss with me at this time? " You replied, stopping at your tracks as you've reached the bus stop. All you need to do now is wait for the bus and keep yourself together with whatever Ms. Han may throw at you.

" I'm assuming you've already done the project for today, " You hummed in response. There was sound of a slight slip from the other line, you assumed that Ms. Han was drinking tea. " Make sure to deliver that presentation well. After that, I want you to attend the board meeting this afternoon on my behalf. Send them my sincere apologies for I have other more important business matters. "

So much for being trustworthy..

" Noted, Ms. Han. " Your ride finally came. Once it opened it's doors, you hopped in and tapped your card at a machine.

" Also, fix this week's schedule. Cancel everything on Friday, " Ms. Han added. You ended up seating at the very end of the bus, beside the window. It just happened to be the only row of seats that's vacant.

" Got it, Ms. Han. Anything else? "

" Ah, right. After the board meeting, take care of Eliza, " Her cat – you should've seen that coming. " Don't worry about the ride to my house, my driver will be picking you up. " She continued, taking one more sip at her tea. The ride was never a problem, but her cat is. Nevertheless, you accepted it since you both needed the job and money.

It didn't took that long until the conversation finally ended. When she hung up, you deeply sighed and looked out of the window. Spring was almost over, the atmosphere started to get colder. The cherry blossom trees began to slowly wither, every petal that has fallen decorated the road and sidewalk. It was both exquisite yet melancholic. Could you ever compare yourself as a cherry blossom? To bloom all over again yet someday, you'll wither once again. Possibly.

As you were gazing outside, your eyes widened as you saw someone else's reflection who sat beside you. His airpods plugged in his ears as he bobbed his head to the beat. You never knew or felt that his presence is already there, not until right now.

He's the same guy you meet each day whenever you took this bus. To be honest, he's eye-catching ever since the first time you saw him. He had the usual black outfit. Curly brunette headed, tall nose, dazzling dark brown orbs, lips — Okay, let's stop fawning over him. In conclusion, he has very well defined facial features. It was obvious that he's one of God's masterpiece, many should've envied him with that.

Despite of him always being your seatmate when the seat next to yours is vacant, you both never conversed with one another. Even with him having an eye for you from the start, no one even dared to start one.

Although, maybe today's a bit different.

The bus abruptly stopped in its tracks as the stop light just switched to red. The driver groaned and scratched the back of his neck.

At the back of the bus, there's you who is silently staring at the window. Awfully close to the window. However, when the bus hit the brakes, your forehead bumped onto the glass. " Ouch! " You groaned in pain as you held your forehead, checking if it bled and to ease the pain. The curly brunette noticed this and paused the music he's playing on the phone. He shifted in his seat to face you, " Are you okay? ". Your eyes met his worrisome ones and it made your heart skip a beat. He's more dashing when he's this close to you. It also made you more timid towards him that you began to stutter, " I- I guess I'm okay.. ".

" Let me see, " He reached out to your hand that's covering your forehead. His hand accidentally touched the sore part in the process, causing you to wince in pain. He whispered an apology before carefully taking your hand off and scan your forehead. He sighed in relief, " Thankfully, it wasn't such a big impact but it did turn red. You can place ice or put an ointment on it as soon as you get off, ok? " You responded with small nod and smile, your heart melting at his kindness.

He carefully placed his hand on your head and light pushed it back, gesturing you to rest. You gladly complied and he smiled, showing his dimples. It was cute, you thought.

" Does it still hurt? " He asked.

" A bit but bearable, " You replied, closing your eyes.

" How about a small talk to distract you from the pain? "

" Sounds good to me. "

" My name's Chan, you? "

" The name's (Y/N). It's nice to finally know you, Chan. "

And that's how everything started to blossom, at the end of Spring.

After that day, you started to anticipate what's going to happen on the next days that you never complained about the annoying beeping clock at dawn ever again. Especially and specifically, on the bus. Your mornings now start with you enthusiastically getting up and preparing for work. Chan happened to bring more interest into your life.

You don't know what kind of sorcery Chan does to always know how to remove your stress or just to make your days better in general. However, you don't mind it. Instead, you're really thankful for it.

You blossomed more in Fall, like a cosmos flower. You bloomed while the rest withered.

You excelled so much at work. The company was at its rough times, yet you handled everything outstandingly that you were praised by the whole company. Even Chan was happy for you, which mattered to you most.

" I knew you were exceptional ever since the beginning, " He murmured while hugging you securely, smiling. You, too, smiled brightly and blushed at that.

It's not only you who blossomed this fall. Your love, too, bloomed in Fall.

You never knew that the potential crush you had for Chan back when he was just a seatmate at the bus would grow. You fell head over heels for his giggles, smiles, kindness, goofiness, just for him. It keeps getting stronger as more time passes that you couldn't control it anymore. This was a first ever since you started working. You never really paid attention to your love life since work was always in the way. You're foreign to this feeling, you're clueless on how to handle it.

This love is the most amazing feeling, you'd be honest. Yet you fear that you'll be rejected or wouldn't be loved back. Then love would be the worst feeling.

Although, your faith and hope will never be taken away from you until the day hasn't came yet, until there's a possibility. You'll keep hoping on his small gestures you'd like to think are hints. You'll put your love for him in the hands of faith. And with that, you became patient with him. Waiting for the time that the true feelings will start to unveil.

______________________________

찬의

Channie

Hey (Y/N)

Are you done with work?

Almost

Why do you ask?

I'll pick you up, ok?

I'm on my way there.

'That's first, yet weird.

But I don't mind.'

Alright, be careful

Seen 7:02PM

______________________________

A month has passed, you two grew closer than ever. Yet occassionally, there would be a hint of awkwardness between the two of you. One would act weirdly, stutter or get nervous around one another. You hoped that it wouldn't ruin your friendship. You valued this friendship more than anything else.

Heading towards the front doors of this company, you could see Chan's figure on the other side. Waiting for you to come out. Once you did, he turned to face you and greet you with a sweet smile. You smiled back. " Let's go? " He said as he offered you his hand. You nodded and timidly took it into yours. That's another first.

Both of you exchanged the usual conversation. Asking about each other's day, telling short stories, joking once in a while, then some comfortable silence here and there, it felt just right. It's already dark out, the city light and streetlights being the only source of light, while the moon is having the pitch black sky to itself. The streets aren't as busy as it was in the daylight. You could hear the rustling and crunching of autumn leaves as it was carried by the wind or getting stepped on.

The two of you eventually reached the bus stop, taking a seat as you wait for a bus. " Do you know the number that bus has? " Chan asked out of the blue, eyes boring on the street. You hummed in confusion, he chuckled. " The bus we always took, especially in the mornings. "

" Ohh.. To be honest, I'm completely unaware of that. " You answered, scratching the back of your neck. Once more, he chuckled then gazed at you while your attention was somewhere else. A bus was coming in your peripheral vision. Once it was in front of you, you scanned for it's number. At the very end, it's written..

" 4419, " You turned to Chan, only to find him staring at you with adoration. You two stayed like that for a few minutes. His eyes were so soft, looking ever so luminous and sparkling underneath the light. He took out a flower he plucked from earlier, placing it behind your ear. Not even tearing his eyes away from yours. " Beautiful, like a cosmos flower, " He whispered, but it was enough for you to hear it clearly. You've felt like you're continously falling, yet Chan still has his grip on you. The same grip when he first held your hand back when you've bumped your forehead on the bus. Loving, gentle yet firm. Telling that he's willing to fall with you. " I love you, (Y/N). "

With just those 4 words, you were filled with so much joy and shock. You froze on your seat. For a second you panicked on what's the right word to say, asking if an I love you too was enough or is it already too redundant.

Although you knew that Chan's anticipating an answer as the clock continues to tick, and waiting is dreadful. Chan will love and cherish anything you say to him. Just the thought of you being truly his will bring him genuine happiness, and that's enough. No need for further more explanations. Then you've came to the conclusion, that there's no other words that best describes your true feelings for him. Simple yet genuine, " I love you too, Chan. "

Now, a love fully blossomed at the end of Falls.

End.

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childishfluff · 3 years

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(im gonna be sending a few seperate asks since theyre seperate thoughts/ideas, sorry for any sort of inbox spam!!) ur pet regressor tommy fic led me into a whole wormhole of many different ideas.. esp abt who else is a pet regressor!!

- wilbur (cat regressor!! also very relaxed, he *will* just sleep on phil or techno's lap for hours on end. mostly nonverbal, but will meow every now nd again. mostly communicates through actions. he can purr. doesn't drop often, but when he does, it's due to extreme stress- meaning he can be pretty sensitive while he's in catspace.)

- tubbo (puppy regressor, but definitely more of a relaxed dog aside from the amnt he communicates, especially through barking, whimpering, and soft "awooo!!"'s. loves snuggles. sometimes, he's scared to come of as annoying, so he's hesitant to slip into pupspace, normally needing someone to help him along and tell him that it's ok for him to be a puppy, nd that he's a very very good boy.)

- karl (kitten regressor!!!! he's either really sleepy or really playful/energetic, and he has no in between on that. he meows.. so much.. all he kno is meow meow!! *very* sensitive while dropped, and as such, he needs a lot of validation and love. will get extremely upset with himself if he notices that anyone is even *slightly* mad/irritated by him.)

- nick (sapnap) (PUPPY REGRESSOR 100000%!!! he's very very loud and extremely playful!!! he can be entertained for *hours* w literally anything, especially toys like chew bones. doesn't really drop too often, but when he does, he drops very very far. something that can trigger his drops is when people compare his traits/actions to those of a dog because he just goes yes!! yes me!!!! dog!!! me!!!! also he loves karl *so* much because karl absolutely spoils him rotten when he's in pupspace.)

- ranboo (kitty regressor!! similar to karl, he can be really sensitive while he's dropped. entirely nonverbal, opting for actions instead. he's a mix of both playful and sleepy. when he sleeps, he curls his entire body up into a circle nd kneads at whatever he's sleeping on until he falls asleep.)

- dream (cat regressor!! sleeps a lot when he's dropped, hes just vv tired. mimics patches, and loves to follow her around/act like she does. even bases his catgear around patches, with tabby-colored cat ears and an outfit based off of similar colors. drops very easily, mostly voluntarily.)

those r the ones i can think of now.. id love to know ypur opinions/interpretations of them!! -🌻

OKAY I’M GONNA GO THROUGH THESE ONE BY ONE, AND SHARE MY THOUGHTS+OTHER POSSIBLE HCS/FIC SCENARIOS, SO LONG POST WARNING Y’ALL

1. Cat Regressor! Wilbur

yes yes yes, I wouldn’t of thought of it myself but the idea is absolutely adorable! I’d totally write that, with like handler/cg!niki in addition to those you listed. And the idea of him using it for stress and therefore being sensitive in catspace? like, that’s amazing.

I could imagine a fic where someone pushes him to regress for fun for once, but he feels like it’s stupid to purposely act like a cat when he doesn’t need it? They don’t pressure him, or anything, but he ends up slipping because he feels safe. and he realizes not only does it help with stress, but it just makes him more happy!

also imagine him slipping around tommy for whatever reason, and just wanting to sleep while Tommy’s trying to do something fun. So he’s dragging around a sleepy kitten and waking him up every two seconds, and it’s really soft and adorable and ends up with Wilbur sleeping somewhat on Tommy so that he can’t get up and he’s like ‘you’re so lucky I love you, dude.’ awww I need to write a fic- no promises but y’know

2.Puppy Regressor!Tubbo

someone actually requested a puppy regressors!tubbo and tommy fic that I’m having trouble writing, like it sounds cute but it’s kinda hard bc I’ve never written puppyspace before. I actually decided to start over but I’ma keep trying on that.

anyways, imagine like, Ranboo or Tommy helping him slip over a discord call! Needing help to regress is something that I understand (I age regress, but I haven’t in a while due to this issue), so I could probably write Tubbo in that position well. Needing to be coaxed and told that it’s okay to be a cute lil puppy, like that’s adorable!

3. Kitten Regressor!Karl

tbh I tried to write kitten!karl but I was half asleep and gave up, I need to get back to that hjsiksja. Like I specialize in writing sensitive regressors w/anxiety over someone being mad at them, so I could definitely pull this off.

and the idea of him being a talkative kitty is sooo cute! Like I can imagine something along the lines of this conversation between him and a handler/cg:

“What do you want?”

“Meowww”

“I don’t know what that means!”

“Meow?” (little head tilt and innocent cute eyes)

“Do you want cuddles?”

*excited meows! and he goes and cuddles up in their lap bc yay, they understood him!*

and imagine kitten!karl playing w/Quackity! very very adorable concept

4. Puppy Regressor! Sapnap

okay okay so I don’t watch sapnap really but this is still adorable! Like the whole ‘me, puppy? yes.’ thing is soooo cute! Imagine George or Dream just forgetting that’s a trigger and making a joke about how one of his mannerisms reminds them of a puppy and suddenly! There’s a puppy to take care of!

and karl spoiling him sounds like something he’d do hjsiksjsa. I can’t really add much on here bc idk much about him/his content past the smp but this is so cute! Maybe I’ll watch a few of his videos and attempt writing him bc I keep getting requests for him

5. Kitten Regressor! Ranboo

yes, I was already thinking about this tbh! Like I’ve written him as a little and it’s kinda similar, he’s sensitive, and he’s less verbal the littler he gets. As a kitten, I can easily picture him just being quiet.

I imagine that he’s really pouty because of this, because he doesn’t know how to communicate otherwise, so this might confuse anyone who may take care of him.

“Why are you pouting? Do you want cuddles? Food? Do you wanna play?”

and he just doesn’t reply bc he’s a kitten and he can’t talk so it’s an endless cycle of guess and check until they reach the right answer, and it’s really funny to watch. I can also imagine that he giggles a lot. Like he’s not verbal or anything, and he doesn’t giggle a lot but sometimes it happens! and if you make him giggle while in kittenspace then you did something right!

it makes everyone happy when he giggles and it’s really soft and cute! I definitely think I’ll write a fic with kitten!ranboo in it, at some point eventually, I think!

6. Cat Regressor! Dream

awwwww- I didn’t even consider the possibility of this but awwww. Imagine Wilbur and Dream in catspace together, just sleeping and cuddling while basically all the other kittens are playing and being hyper. And everyone’s trying to get them to play but they’re sleepy! (ofc they end up playing anyways bc their friends are adorable and convincing but y’know)

and I really like the idea of him mimicking patches! I’ve seen a few pet regresors say that they mimick/copy their pets so it kinda feels realistic and likely! and plus, it’s really cute.

and since his regression is voluntary, I can imagine him like one minute, just chillin w/george and sapnap and going ‘what if- what if I just went *cat mode*’ and he tries to hint to his friends that he wants to slip but they’re not getting it so it’s kinda frustrating for him but funny for the readers to see play out bc George and Sapnap are being completely oblivious to everything. Hjsiksja that’d be funny

Thank you for sending this it, like seriously! It was really fun to go through and talk about these, I might make additional headcannon lists once I’m actually awake tomorrow bc I shouldn’t be up rn but yeah, I just wanted to go through and respond to this! <3

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blackberry-gingham · 3 years

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This is a bit personal but how about beatle x reader headcannons/imagines of how the boys would react to their reader feeling self conscious about their body

No problem at all! So, I've seen this trope done quite a bit on other headcannon type pages for other fandoms, and since body insecurity is something very serious to me that I myself use to (and still do) deal with, I wanted to try and take this a little deeper then "you're sad, they tell you you're beautiful, the end", so I'm sorry if these get a touch angsty, but I promise everything works out ❤️

Also, I'm so sorry this took so long dear! These are somewhere between headcannons and my usual imagines, so I hope they're alright enough to make up for the wait! And remember, you're amazing and wonderful, just the way you are ❤️❤️❤️

George

Personally, I feel like George is sort of ?? forgotten ??? Of all the boys

By that I mean, like even non Beatle fans know Paul and John, and they might know Ringo just bc that name stands out, but George???

I mean, ik back before I was a fan I could never remember who "the fourth one" was

So anyway, even tho he's kind of in the background compared to the other three, that doesn't mean he's not sensitive to how the others are treated/feeling

At the end of the day I think he'd be his usual self and a good, sympathetic ear to insecurity issues

When he finds out, it's kind of an overtime process

He's use to bringing you snacks and take a little break like that with you, especially after a long day of recording or practice

But lately, you've been... Strange about it

Either straight up turning him down, or picking at the food and not really touching anything

He asks what's wrong, as gently as he can, seeing as he honestly already suspects the answer

You and George have been together for a while now, and he's always been easy to talk to, and understanding if you don't feel like sharing, so you feel that you can be honest

"I'm just... Trying to watch my figure, you know?"

He just kind of looks at you, confused at first

"Why?"

His face is hard to read, and yet still manages to turn to a completely different, very serious, emotion

"Has someone said something to you?"

You now have his full attention as he puts aside his guitar

You assure him that no, it's just a personal thing

"Oh", he nods

"Yeah", you nod

You're not sure how this makes you feel. Perhaps you're glad it's over, but you can't help but feel... Shunned?

But before you can ruminate too much, George brushes off his lap as though he's about to stand

Instead he sits back and looks at you

"Come here"

His voice is serious, but not quite stern

Invitingly, he becons you over and nods towards his lap

You look from his face to his long, thin legs

At first you decline, brushing it off almost as a joke

You look to your own legs

He can't be serious?

He asks you again, "Come on, I want to show you something"

At this point your curiosity is peaked

You get up and approach cautiously, as though he might run away

When the moment of truth arrives, you slowly, s l o w l y, begin to sit

Tired of waiting, George hooks his hands under your knees and pulls you forward

You fall onto his lap with a little thud and you figure this is it, expecting him to shove you off

Instead, when nothing happens, you dare to peak your scrunched up eyes open and see his smile waiting for you

He leans in for a gentle kiss, all the while his hands are resting on your thighs

His legs are like iron, not uncomfortable to sit on, quite the opposite actually, but strong in a way you hadn't expected

When the kiss is broken, he slides his palms up and out until they're resting on your hips

His callused fingers tickle a little, even through the fabric of your clothes

"So um, what were you going t-?"

He shushes and you, and picks up your hand in his

George brings the heel of your palm a mere inch away from his lips

He pauses just for a moment, making direct eye contact with you, before turning back to his work

He presses a trail of kisses along the inside of your arm, to the crook of your elbow, and up your bicep

You shiver, tensing as he goes up

But he doesn't recoil, or hesitate, or do anything of the sort

He gives equal love and attention to every inch of your flesh as he goes, only stopping at your shoulder to make sure you're still alright

As though giving permission, you bite your lip and give a subtle nod, curious to see what happens next

George releases your arm, now dedicating both hands to massaging your hips with all the thumb dexterity of a skilled guitarist

Next he moves along your shoulders, dropping down just a moment to give some attention to the bump of your collar bone

When he's done there, he lingers on your neck, gently kissing and sucking up and down before settling in one spot

After a moment, he starts humming a familiar tune against your skin

"Do you this song?", His voice is just a whisper

"Hm?"

"It's one of the first songs we wrote together"

George pulls back again to look at your face...

"As much as I love you for what's out here"

...Then presses one more kiss to your lips

"I love you even more for what's in here"

He kisses your forehead

Finally he pulls back one more time, and the way he looks at you is as though all the love in the world is inside those eyes

"Never forget that. Promise me"

You seal your promise with a kiss

John

Ok so I think we all know John struggled with an eating disorder(s)

So he knows the whole nine yards of what it's like being "overweight", "underweight", somewhere in between, and still never being good enough for everyone else

I mean John is basically infamous for having been body shamed and criticized out of all the boys, particularly in the early years

So all this to say, he knows how awful it feels

To wake up in the morning, try to get dressed, and take forever to choose an outfit because you hate how everything looks on you

To look in the mirror and be unable to stand your own reflection

To think once, twice, and yes, even thrice before enjoying your favorite little snack, or even just a regular meal

He wouldn't wish it on his worst enemy

And when he finds out that you, the most lovely person in the world, feel that way...

Oh, his heart breaks

All the boys would take this quite seriously of course, but John simply has a certain... understanding that the others don't

He finds out one night on a dinner date with you

You've picked at everything all night, hardly a bite

This is starting to form a pattern, and rest assured, he has been noticing

At the end of the meal, he asks if everything was alright in a way that references much more then the food

"Oh yes, fine", you force that same smile you always give when he asks that question

He waits until you're both in the comfort of your flat to breach the topic

You see, John is a man of many faces

The first layer is prickly and aggressive, the second is a mischievous joker, the third a sweet, but anxious individual

And under all those masks, the real John, is the most compassionate and loving man you've ever met

So when he does ask you what's really going on, he's very serious and very gentle

He wants you to know that you're safe to tell him anything and that he wants to help with whatever is so very clearly bothering you

It's tough to get it out, but John is patient and encouraging all the while and you manage it

You're surprised to hear that he suspected as much

John tries to go a little deeper, asking of there's anything particular that makes you feel this way or if it's just a constant thing

Regardless of your answer, he offers you what advice he can, from both personal experience and what he learned from his therapy sessions

John's not too great at comforting speeches, but he'll be damned if he doesn't do everything he can to make sure you know just how much he loves you

He loves you for your heart, and how patient and kind you are with not just him, but everyone

He loves you for your mind, and how you too can have deep conversations about topics that are important to you both

And perhaps most of all, he loves you for your personality and how you can poke a bit of fun, just like he does, and you aren't afraid to put him in his place when he's being an arse

"Is there anything I can do for you love?"

You smile, feeling just a bit better after his speech

"How's about a cuddle?"

John grins cheekily, "Now you're talking!"

He half tackles you from his seat beside you, turning your seated position into a reclining one

You can't help but laugh playfully as he easily picks you up in a bear hug and slips under you so you can rest on top of him

He presses a kiss to your cheek

"How's that?"

You smirk back

"It's a start"

John gasps in mock disbelief at your remark

You just wrap your arms around his shoulders, snuggling against him

"Well then, I guess I'll just have to keep it up"

At that, he nuzzles the side of your face, glad to see you finally feeling relaxed

John give you one more squeeze in his strong arms, holding you close

You two spend the rest of the evening cuddled up and cozy until you fall asleep in each other's arms

Paul

Now it's no secret Paul has always been the "pretty one" of the Beatles

I mean heck, even in the freaking cartoon he has the least goofy and caricature esque face of all the boys

But personally I would imagine that he's felt a certain pressure from time to time to keep up his looks!

It would be quite draining for everyone to have this flawless image of you and then expect you to live up to it 24/7, so in that regard he understands struggling with feeling less then perfect

And certainly with feeling subpar when others just expect far too much!

The night it comes out, the two of you have plans to attend a soiree of sorts

Music, lights, dancing, champaign, the hosts are pulling all the stops and it'll be absolutely a black tie affair

You've got a very fancy dress for the occasion that you got as a gift from Paul some time ago, it's all sparkly, exquisite, and your favorite color to boot

And it... "fits"

As in, you can zip it up and move and breathe comfortably in it, but it just....

Paul finds you standing in front of the full length mirror, mascara beginning to run quietly down your face as you tug and smooth and pull the dress in varying places

He's honestly a bit panicked and confused at first. After all, he does hate to see you upset, let alone cry

"is something wrong love? Do you not like that one? There's plenty of time to change!"

"it's nothing! Just an eyelash"

You try to laugh it off and hope that he'll just leave you alone

You see, Paul has been talking about this shindig for weeks in advance

It's hosted by a good friend, many more of which will be in attendance tonight

Not to mention he hardly ever gets to do something nice away from the press, so you're trying very hard not to ruin things for him

Paul walks over to you, concern written all over his face

"No really, what's wrong?"

You try to wave him off, but he takes you gently by the shoulders and looks you square in the eye

He looks around your beautiful eyes, searching, and it almost feels as though he can read your mind

At last he says "You don't want to go?"

With that, you just can't manage to hold a brave face any longer and the tears come rolling down

Without another word, Paul guides you to a seat on the bed and returns swiftly with some tissues

He dries your eyes as best he can and thumbs a soothing circle on your hand, giving you space to tell him what's on your mind

When you've had the chance to situate yourself, you tell him that you don't mind the party it's just that the way you feel in that dress, in fact, in all your dresses is just...

Paul nods understandingly as you trail off, and the two of you sit in silence for a moment

You're concerned you've upset him and ask as much

"What? No, of course not love!"

"But I know how much you want to g-"

Paul shushes you and brings a hand up to stroke your cheek

"I don't care about some stupid party, nothing matters more to me then you. I mean that"

He tilts his head and smiles at you

"Tell you what? We'll just skip it and have some fun right here!"

For a moment you're afraid he's doesn't mean it, but there's a childlike gleam in his eyes and grin on his face that tells you he not only means it, but is excited at the prospect

You're still a little doubtful that you haven't made him upset, but Paul reassures you until you're able to take him at his word

Absolutely relieved, you agree and wipe away your last few tears

"Good. Now let's get this off you, eh?"

Paul helps you take out your jewelry as well as undoing the far too complicated latches, ribbon, and zipper on the back of the dress

His delicate fingers slide up and down the length of your neck and back reverently as he works, planting gentle kisses to the nape of your neck every so often

With the hardest part over, and ever the gentleman, he gives you space to slip it off and put on something more comfortable

When next you see him, he's putting on a sweet and slow record, something like what you would've probably heard tonight

He's removed his suit jacket, tie, and shoes and when he turns to see you in your adorable PJs he smiles at you like you're the belle of the ball

"Ahem, may I have this dance?"

He bows low and offers you his hand, peaking up at you for just a moment to shoot you a playful grin

You laugh at his silly antics and give in happily to the charade

Paul leads you in a steady waltz around and around the room, the two of you stealing kisses and suppressing laughter all the while

When the record comes to an end, you both collapse on the couch and catch your breath

By now, you're fully confident you've had more fun just now then you would've all night had you gone

After a minutes rest, Paul hops up from his seat

"Just a minute, I forgot something... Wait right here!"

He darts off around the bend and when next you see him, he's carrying two flutes of champagne

Paul takes a seat beside you again and hands you yours

"I was saving this for when we got back, thought we could leave early and enjoy the rest of the evening alone"

You smile, touched by the thoughtfulness and still riding the high of the previous activities

Finally, you propose a toast

"To my amazing, lovely boyfriend"

Paul smiles at you with adoration. You mean so much more to him then a mere toast could describe

"To my love, the most gorgeous dance partner in the world"

Ringo

Idk if this is/was a thing, or if it's just something I've noticed, but Ringo seems to be the butt of the joke, particularly in regards to his appearance, a lot

Like he's the "short" one and he's got that nose

I only ever see him take it like a champ and all in good fun, and laid back as he is, it doesn't seem to hold him back but I'm sure he'd understand feeling insecure about ones body/looks

But for you to be insecure???

He just??????

When Ringo finds out, he's honestly the most bewildered of all

He finds you sat against the wall, hunched up and crying, half clothed, and a mess of clothing strewn around you

Usually whenever something's bothering you, you know you can bring it to him.

He's always there for you, after all

So to see you like this, he's absolutely terrified that something truly awful has happened

In that moment, thanks to his roaring adrenaline, he goes from rock star to olympic sprinter and dashes to your side so quickly it's as though he teleported

"What's wrong love, what's wrong?"

He holds your face up to look at him and quickly checks over you to make sure you're not injured or sick in some way

When he sees the pain in your eyes, he's nearly crying too

He wants so desperately to help you, and take all your troubles and worries away this very moment.

Even if it meant he had to shoulder the suffering for you, he'd do it in a heartbeat, no doubt

You feel rather embarrassed to be caught like this, and even worse still to see your boyfriend so upset on your behalf

This takes you back to square one, crying and nonverbal for a bit longer

Luckily, Ringo catches on that him getting upset is only going to make you more upset, so he settles himself and holds you until you're ready

When you are ready, you manage to choke out your insecurity, trusting him as you always do

And when he hears you're insecure about your body, or even your looks in general, he is just....

Ringo.exe has stopped working

Mind, it not that he doesn't understand your feelings!!

It's just that you are so completely and absolutely beautiful and kind and so much more to him, that he simply cannot fathom the idea of holding the opinion of you as any less

"is it the clothes? Because forget the damn clothes" He takes a handful and throws them up and away, like confetti

"I'll buy you a whole new closet if you like! W-would you like that?"

He smiles hopefully at you, as though you truly would like that, and it'll solve all your problems

You simply shake your head

And, after moment, Ringo starts to understand

He sits with you silently for a moment, the gravity of your feelings is so important to him that he's not sure plain old him has something good enough to say

But he knows he wants to say something

So, he meditates on it for a moment, and decides he can only tell you the truth

"Well... you know that I love you, yeah? Sometimes I wonder how a guy like me got so lucky to be with a right angel like you.... And so do the lads"

He laughs that deep, silly laugh you love so much

"Why, I think you're the loveliest girl in all of England er uh, no, all the world!"

That earns a little smile from you

You're about to respond when you catch a shiver

You're only down to your undergarments after all, and it's a bit drafty

Ringo notices and before any mention can be made, he sets to work at removing his sweater, eager to make sure you're cared for

It seems to be putting up a bit of a fight, but he manages to come out on top

"Er uh, will this be ok? I know you're fed up with clothes right now, but I don't want you to freeze neither"

He's genuinely concerned about your feelings in the subject, even as he holds the garment out to you

Buuuut... It's cozy and oversized on you, plus it smells comfortingly of him, so you take it

"Hey, that looks better on you then it does me!"

He laughs again, the state of him made a bit more comical by his now frizzed up mop top

You point the issue out to him, grinning yourself, and he shakes it out like a dog

Which, of course, only makes it ten times worse

For the first time that day, you laugh, and it's the most beautiful sound Ringo's ever heard

Feeling a bit better now, Ringo helps you stand and offers you some tea downstairs

You take a few steps, and then stop feeling the draft give rise to some goose bumps all up your legs

"Maybe I should get some pants..."

At the mere suggestion, Ringo looks at you like he has a bright idea and immediately goes to undo his belt

You burst out laughing, and stop him

He's confused at first, but when he realizes his own absurdity in his effort to be helpful, he can't help but laugh a little too

In the end, you come to the conclusion that a blanket and a cuddle on the couch will do nicely instead... Which is exactly what you do

Ringo spends the rest of the day keeping you entertained, warm, and covered in kisses

#the beatles #beatles x reader #john lennon x reader #paul mccartney x reader #ringo starr x reader #george harrison x reader #tw eating disorder mention #comfort #angst

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kamikui · 3 years

Text

Onmyoji Movie

HI so I watched the Onmyoji Movie based off of the game last night and . . . . that sure was something!

In all honesty despite the weird path they decided to take, I actually enjoyed the movie. The music and detail in the scenery was amazing, I LOVED the costuming for a lot of the background characters esp in the Demon Realm, and a lot of the easter eggs that were hidden were nice.

BUT. but. As someone heavily invested in the lore of the game (especially concerning Ibaraki) how they decided to deal with the movie was like. really confusing. It genuinely felt as if NE gave the directors a cast of characters and let them do what they wanted from there w/o any prior knowledge of the game.

(spoilers down below)

Before I really pry into that though, I’ll kinda note some of the characters.

Seimei/Qingming was actually my favorite. I think this is sort of an unpopular opinion right now, but his characterization was so nice even if it sorta leans into the basic drama hero type personality. In the game Seimei is supposed to be you/the player, and not everyone is going to have the same interpretation of him-- and that’s what the movie felt like, a different interpretation. I will say I didn’t really like them making him related to their version of Orochi. I believe the snakes name was Xiangliu? I can’t remember, but I didn’t see the reason in that.

If anything, keeping him a fox and having a version of Tamamo no Mae popping up to offer advice to help with the situation would’ve been nicer, and that’d keep more of Seimei’s backstory kept in tact-- because asides from him becoming an Onmyoji apprentice at a young age we literally do not know shit about him. And legit I wouldn’t necessarily mind bc it’s a movie, you’re not going to get everyone’s backstory within 2 hrs, but we can’t really get attached to him.

Yao Bikuni/Baini was. Hm. I like her as a character in the movie, but I don’t like where she’s placed as a character in the movie. She’s a Seer? in the game and tbh it should’ve stayed that way, like I honestly can’t see her willingly working for one clan. “But how would she--” In game she is also influenced by Seimei pretty heavily, as in the in game chapters she believed he would be able to kill her. Up until she got manipulated by Orochi, she stuck to his side. With the Stone plot in the movie, if it put him in danger she would be there in order to try and help him, OR, try and pull him to join Orochi if they went that route. And they KINDA tried to hint at it when Seimei “died” with Orochi using her image, but like. come on man. Let Yao be evil for a little bit.

That being said I didn’t like the Master & Shikigami bit with those two, or the implied romance they tried to pull with them. Canonically Seimei legit brushes her off and when shes like “ohhh you’ll kill me right” hes like “lol sure” and thats IT. Literally any form of romance that’s tried at Seimei he brushes it off. he’s not into it he’s an amnesiac.

The “Oh if you become my shikigami you won’t become evil” thing was :/ to me as well because again, canonically, even though Seimei is being taunted he can contain the Kitsune part pretty well even when he wasn’t aware he was kitsune. Like I think the part as a kid was a good bit to add since it’s when he’s first being exposed to Onmyoji type stuff, but like. idk idk I couldn’t vibe with that power dynamic while they were trying to hint romance.

Continuing on with Hiromasa/Yuan Boya and Kagura/Shenle, again considering this is a movie, I’m somewhat content with their characters.

I really liked how energetic this Kagura was, and given they weren’t able to do her actual backstory, I liked the one she was given. Her introduction in the movie was really great too-- and compared to Hiromasa I felt they gave her a little more attention? Which like fine, but not so good for Hiro.

They didn’t even. Discuss his archery skills at any point which was disappointing. The most plot relevance he (and honestly Kagura too) had was finding Seimei while trying to arrest him but that’s it. And yes they showed some of his skill while he was fighting Kamaitachi, but that’s the extent of it. AGAIN i’ll consider the fact this was a movie and they didn’t have enough time to fit EVERYTHING in, but since they gave Yao and Seimei so much attention you would think they’d be able to spare some for the other two protagonists in the game.

Before I leave those two tho I’m still trying to figure out what the fuck happened in the end. Like did hiromasa get promoted in some form? was he given credit for what happened between the demon realm? Why did he separate from Kagura since they got close during the movie? I guess like bc work duties but still. I have no idea tho like i was sitting there not processing a single thing. Regardless I did like Hiro and Kags acting like siblings despite in this canon them not being related (at least it’s never clarified).

Ok so before I dive into the whole mess that is the Cimu/”Ibaraki” character, stuff on side characters.

While I didn’t like the outfits for Sakura(? Momo? Both of them?) or Chocho, I liked the roles that they held as sort of trainers for the rest of Seimeis shikigami. In fact I liked the whole courtyard ordeal in general. I have my own worldbuilding thing that has a similar theme so seeing it being used canonically was pretty nice. I do wish we could’ve seen more SSRs or even SRs though. Like, why couldn’t Aoandon be hanging out in the courtyard to give gossip to Hiro & Kagura? Yamakaze or Shishio hanging out in the forest, or like. bruh even Jikikaeru as the boss in the Showdown considering he runs that in game.

I did like the fish man! I really did, but literally everything about him could’ve been Jikikaeru, I don’t think it’s that hard to make a frog man.

Also as mentioned previously it would’ve been nice to see Tamamo make an appearance considering he makes random ones every now and then. The Mujou Brothers could’ve helped the shikigami when they were escaping Seimeis courtyard, Shiranui could’ve been an entertainer while they were traveling through the demon realm, HAKU??? couldve been one of Seimeis shiki?? literally anyone. They have all these misc characters in the background but barely any of them resemble in game characters.

GOD EVEN KOSODENOTE COULDVE BEEN THERE . . . . at the scene where Kagura was messing with jewelry and clothing . . . Koso couldve been the seller. Aobozu could’ve worked at the shrine . . . . I just. Man.

ANYWAYS . . . pulling from that and going into whatever the hell Cimu is. god.

So according to casting, Cimu is supposed to be Ibaraki. But the thing is. There’s only like. 3-4 Elements about Ibaraki that goes into him. Everything else is Shuten which i honestly find pretty funny?? Take away the homophobic jokes and combine the gay coded character into his love interest. Which I mean that’s better than making them brothers but at what cost.

anyways. Cimu previously being an onmyoji but turning evil -> shuten previously being a monk and turning evil. The design of the hand that Cimu uses as transportation -> SP Shutens design where he sits on two hands. Red hair -> shuten. The horns, eye color (minus scleras), arm getting chopped off, and his ambition to grow stronger are really the only parts of Ibaraki that’s in the character-- and even then you could say Shuten has a similar ambition of growing stronger. It’s just so scuffed.

ALSO IT DOESN’T MAKE SENSE. literally it doesn’t make sense when you look at the characters.

Why couldn’t they just stick with Kuro Seimei considering the fact that this Ibaraki works with Ootengus and Yuki Onna/The Snow Queen? They could’ve given Seimei a twin brother to work off of this. But like if they really wanted to keep Ibaraki and Shuten, they could’ve made it that Shuten was being manipulated by Orochi and Ibaraki was serving him, because there’s a LOT of shit you could do just with Shuten by himself. Legit no reason to combine the two since they’re BOTH heavily marketed characters.

Legit like, Shuten being controlled, given Ibaraki’s loyalty to Shuten he would most likely follow him no matter what, and even like. Have a form of Momiji to kind of help out-- probably at a heavy expense of Shuten doing something for her, but still. like i LOVED the snow queen, I loved this interpretation of yuki so I wouldn’t want to get rid of her, but they shouldve went with Seimei 2 instead of “ibaraki”. It’s just so much and it doesn’t make sense.

Now orochi himself and how that was handled was like. Okay I guess. If anyone was being talked to through their head at the time it should’ve been Yao Bikuni considering she allies with him in canon at one point. but like whatever. I did think the end was neat where Seimei forced him into becoming his shikigami, like I liked that whole process. Otherwise all antagonists were pretty underwhelming.

I also was not fond of the ending where like Seimei just turns away at the broken bridge. Like does this mean the Demon realm is completely cut off now? just fix the bridge. Also does Seimei just fuck off?? I know theres a scene where he’s standing on the roof but. i dont know.

Regardless the movie was great, I had fun watching it. When ibaraki came in I accidentally paused the movie a couple of times while spamming screenshots. Even tho hes like kinda ugly but that’s ok. There WERE some angles where he was hot as hell but otherwise they did his actor so dirty. The horns were just. God I won’t delve into that bc this post is long as hell BUT. BUT. THE MOVIE WAS GOOD. just not if ure into the lore for the game LMAO.

Ok that’s it for now bye

#Onmyoji #this is so long and probably incomprehensible but these r my thots #tbh i cant wait for the drama that's coming too they teased it but w like. actual outfits from the game #it was seimei and momiji so i think its following in game chapters #i wonder how they'll end it tho since those chapters arent finished(?)

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mentalpolaroids · 3 years

Text

CH | 17. here for you

CH 16

🔸

Kevin took Dustin home after making sure I was fine. I wasn't, but I had to pretend to be so my brother could give me some space. The fight with Noah kept replaying in my head, making me keep fighting the tears from falling, even if I was alone to cry all I wanted. I hated being mad at people or having people mad at me and the fact it was happening with Noah was making it very difficult to process. I refused to accept that my best friend disappointed me and it led to me yelling at him and feeling angry with him. It was a feeling we both have never experienced before and it was hitting me harder than I could ever imagine. I cleaned the house while Kevin was gone, not only because it was messier than I thought it could be considering the five of us didn't leave the couch all night, but also to try and distract myself. I could wait for my brother and have him help with the cleaning but I was in a desperate need of keeping my mind out of Noah and our fight. Our first fight. It almost sounds like we're a couple. We're not, but it hurts as much. I had just finished brooming a corner by the couch when Kevin entered the front door. My back was turned towards him but I could feel his eyes on me, unsure what to say or ask or even if he should say something at all. I was unsure either. I wanted to cry and vent but at the same time I didn't want to talk to anyone, I didn't want to talk about the fight and relieve it over again. I've done that enough in my head and it was killing me slowly.

"Do you need help cleaning?", Kevin's voice was soft, as if I would break if he spoke louder or arsher. I probably would.

"No, thanks. I'm pretty much finished." my head was low as I spoke, still not looking at my brother now standing behind the couch.

"I'm gonna make us something to eat, ok?"

I didn't answer but I think he knew I was grateful for his gesture and company, my body language showed it. I put the broom back in the laundry room and went to sit by the kitchenette counter waiting for the food Kevin was cooking, enjoying it's smell that was honestly calming me down. After a few more minutes, Kevin sat a plate of pancakes in front of me and a cup of hot chocolate. I smiled lightly at the view in front of me and at how well my brother knew me.

"All vegan, as you like it."

I looked at him and smiled wider while he sat next to me and dripped some caramel on top of my pancakes. He put some on his too and we started eating quietly. I was just waiting for him to drop the question and I was mentally preparing myself to answer it. He probably heard some of it but I knew my brother: he wanted the words to come out of my mouth. It was something he always did to help me stop keeping everything to myself and suffer in silence. I hated the process of it because sometimes it was really hard to talk about some things but, in the end, it helped. I just hoped this time it would help too.

"So,", here we go, "what happened back there? Dustin and I were making up conspiracy theories of why on Earth were the best couple of best friends to ever exist having a fight."

I couldn't help but laugh at his dorkiness and I started imagining the two guys talking to each other jokingly but with a serious face about what Noah and I's fight was about.

"Friends fight too."

"Yes, but not you two. You've been to hell and back for each other and never once did I see you two fight, not like this."

"Did you hear what it was about?"

"Not really."

I took a deep breath and a sip of my hot chocolate before dropping the bomb.

"I found a pack of cigarettes in Noah's bag."

"Oh."

And so I told him every bit of our fight and why I was so mad at him.

"I just don't want him to go down the way Dylan did."

"Yeah, me neither. But, even though I understand why you're mad at him I still think fighting is not the best way to talk him out of smoking."

"Kevin, we've been through this before..."

He interrupted me.

"I know, that's why I'm saying fighting won't solve anything. You're mad because you're scared and Noah is smoking because he's scared too. He's not doing this to hurt you, he's doing this because he is hurting and this is how he copes with it."

"He promised me he would talk to me anytime he felt like smoking when he was feeling down."

"And do you?"

I looked at him questioningly, genuinely confused with his question.

"Do what?"

"Talk to anyone about how you feel or about your problems when you're down?", I looked down, not wanting to admit he was right, "You keep things to yourself because, as you say, you don't want to bother anyone with your shit, even after everyone tells you they're here for you no matter what. Noah is just doing the same."

"Yes but this is different..."

"Is not that different, sis. You should talk to him, like, really talk to him. Make him feel like he can be the most vulnerable with you. Noah... fuck, he loves you, Kelly. I know he will open up to you whenever he's ready, he doesn't trust anyone else as much as he trusts you. He's there for you and is patient with you no matter what, you just need to be patient and be there for him as well. I know you love him enough too to do that."

A tear slid down my cheek and Kevin immediately cleaned it up. He was right, I was being harsh on him for something I'm also to blame for. I guess we really are a great pair because we're both stubborn asses. I lean closer to Kevin and hug his torso. He hugs me back tightly and kisses my forehead.

"How about you call him later, huh? I hate seeing the second hottest couple ever not talking to each other."

I blushed at the couple thing but then I looked at him grinning teasingly

"Who's the first hottest couple?"

"Dustin and I, obviously."

"No way! For real?!"

"Yup."

"Oh my God, Kevin, I'm so happy!"

I hugged him again and he laughed at my enthusiasm. I was really, really happy, I've been waiting for them to get together since they met each other and it was finally happening, so containing my excitement wasn't even an option.

"Me too, sis, me too."

After teasing Kevin a little, something I just had to do, we both finished breakfast, me in a much better mood than I was before our conversation. Kevin insisted on me taking a shower instead of helping him clean the kitchen, since I didn't take said shower I was supposed to because the fight with Noah made me forget about it. The water helped me relax completely and clear my head. The remains of negativity and fear in my mind were washed away and I felt ready and determined to make things work with my best friend and call him later. Until then, I wanted to spend time with my brother, have the day for the two of us, it has been a long time since that happened and I missed teasing him and making fun of him. I knew he missed doing the same to me too. I went to the living room dressed in my favorite pair of sweatpants, a cropped sweater and my black sleepers. A comfortable outfit to match my relaxed state, which was rare lately and especially after that morning. Kevin was on the couch with the tv remote in hand scrolling through Netflix, so, as the good sister I am, I sat beside him and yanked the remote from him. I tried hard not to laugh at the bitch face he made my way.

"Oh hell no, it doesn't work like that.", and with that, the remote was yanked from my hand and it was my turn to make a bitch face that, by the entertained expression on my brother's face, was a pretty good one. Kevin selected a random movie while I tried to get the remote back and I guess I was really in need of a chill day because it didn't take long for me to give up and accept whatever Kevin chose. Through the movie, we would comment about everything and anything and make jokes with each other and laugh our asses off, even though the film wasn't even that funny. I missed having these moments with my brother, it reminded me of when we were little and he would watch my favorite movie with me over and over again. Oncd, we were watching it in the living room and he made a joke about a specific scene of the movie and I laughed really hard. I remember thinking it was the funniest thing I've ever heard in my 8 years of life and, since then, every time I felt like watching that movie, I would make him watch it with me so he could tell that same joke, and I would laugh as hard as the first time I heard it. We were making our own jokes now and I was having the best time. It was therapeutic.

"Doesn't that woman look like an older version of Camila?"

"It does... wow, she's going to be a MILF. I'm jealous." Kevin laughed.

"Speaking of Camila, I ran into Julio the other day, he even paid for my coffee."

Remember the good, great, amazing mood I was in? Yeah, it died. My body tensed, my smile faded and my mind started racing. Kevin noticed and paused the movie.

"Kelly?"

I didn't answer at first, my brain was still processing the unpleasant thought of Julio and all the uncomfortable situations he has put me through. My brother called my name again.

"Hmm?"

"You ok?"

I opened my mouth to say Yes but I quickly changed my mind. It was time. I didn't want to ruin the amazing lazy day we were having but it was time to tell my brother what our best friend's boyfriend was like.

"I have to tell you something about Julio.", my voice was low, compared to a few seconds ago, "You're probably going to get mad at me for not telling you sooner but Noah knows and he's been helping me..."

"Sis, what are you talking about? You're scaring me."

And so I told him everything. The first time I saw him outside the restaurant with a woman, when he paid for my lunch, the times he was outside the company, the night at the club... Everything he did, said, the way he looked at me, the way he made me feel and how Noah has been helping me and keeping me safe.

"Fuck..."

"Yeah."

"You have to tell Camila."

"I know."

"Seriously, Kelly, that's really fucked up. And how the hell did I not notice? I mean, I remember you acting weird that night we went out but I thought it was just the sexual tension between you and Noah..."

"Kevin!"

"I know, I'm sorry, I'm... I just wasn't expecting that. Shit."

Kevin's body was leaning hard against the couch and his leg was bouncing. He was getting anxious.

"When are you planning on telling Camila?"

"I don't know. I had some opportunities but I always chickened out or wasn't sure if it was just me acting paranoid."

"You're not paranoid, Kelly. Fuck, if Noah noticed too and even saw him waiting for you outside... Jesus, that's messed up.", his voice trembled, "Why didn't you tell me sooner? I could help too."

"I know, I know, and I'm sorry, really. It was because of the same reason I didn't tell Camila, and also because you weren't at your best when this started."

"Right.", he looked down and I grabbed his hand that was anxiously fidgeting with the other.

"Hey, don't go blaming yourself now, I'm fine. Noah's been helping me and taking care of me."

"I know, I believe that, trust me. The dude would kill for you."

I rolled my eyes but the blush was inevitable. Besides the weight of Julio's presence in my head, I felt even more safe and relieved now that Kevin knew. It took us some time to put this subject aside but we managed to go back to the movie, this time watching it a little less enthusiastically.

I was about to take my sweater off to replace it with the oversized one I use to sleep when my phone rang. I didn't recognize the number but I picked up anyway.

"Hello?"

"Kelly?", a man's voice answered on the other side, a voice I couldn't associate with anyone I knew.

"Yes?"

"It's Dylan."

"Oh, hi."

To say I was surprised, mostly shocked, was putting it lightly. First, I had no idea Noah's brother was already out of prison and second I totally didn't expect him to call me. Everything about this call was unexpected so it took me a few seconds to process.

"Look, I know it's late but can you please come over?"

He sounded like he was in a rush and desperate, if the emphasis on the please was any indication.

"Are you at Noah's?"

"Yes, I'm sorry to bother you, especially because I know you probably weren't expecting me to call but I...", he interrupted himself to take a deep breath, like talking was making him tired, "I think he needs you. Can you please come over now? I'll pick you up if you want."

"No, it's fine, I'll drive. I'll try to be there in five."

"Thank you so much, Kell. See you soon."

"See ya."

I rushed to put some sneakers on as I left my room. I only had time to grab the keys to Kevin's car and take my phone out of my sweater's pocket to text him and let him know where I was going, since he was already in his room and I didn't want to waste time explaining to him why I was going to Noah's so late, especially when we weren't exactly on speaking terms. Driving, my mind kept making up reasons why Noah "needed me", what the hell happened, why Noah didn't call me himself and the fact that Dylan was free. Like, the later alone was enough to make me confused and anxious, and it showed by the constant tapping of my fingers on the steering wheel. It took me exactly five minutes to get to my best friend's house. I rushed to the front door and rang the doorbell. My heart was beating so fast that I could feel my entire body shake from it's pulsation and my mind was racing with thoughts and possibilities of what I would find on the other side of the door. I just wanted to know what was going on. The door opened a few seconds after and there was Dylan. I almost didn't recognize him from our high school days. He looked older but in a healthy way and his posture, besides shaken up, was more mature. Nothing compared to the troubled boy I used to know. Dylan looked kind of surprised to see me too and that was understandable. Puberty did me good, I admit, and I wasn't as shy and timid as I was before, which reflected in the way I presented myself. I was more confident and sure of myself, even though I was an anxious mess at the moment.

"Hey, you got here fast.", he said, his voice tired, matching his eyes.

"Yeah, I did.", he let me into the house I knew so well and turned to me, closing the door behind me, "It's good to see you."

"You too, Kell.", he smiled weakly and I mirrored it, feeling the familiarity of the nickname.

We stood there in an awkward silence just staring at each other. We both changed a lot and I guess we were having a difficult time taking it in. I cleared my throat and broke the silence.

"So, what happened?"

"Right, I'm sorry again for dropping this on you this late."

"Don't worry about it, it's fine."

He took a deep breath.

"Well, as you already noticed, I was released from jail.", he looked down, shame in his eyes, "And I asked Noah to pick me up. He didn't know I was being released today, nobody knew. I wanted to surprise him and our parents but... I didn't get the reception I was hoping for."

He looked up, his eyes averting mine, but I saw them shine with tears wanting to fall.

"My dad was livid. He didn't want me coming home, let alone unannounced, so he tried to put me out of the house in a not so nice way..."

"Dylan..."

"He was about to punch me but Noah stepped in front of me. I tried to stop him but I think he was drunk and Noah was trying to defend me and then I tried to defend him but... he just took everything and I could barely do anything to stop it."

The tears fell and his eyes finally met mine.

"I'm so sorry, Kelly, I didn't want this to happen, I..."

"Dylan, it's ok, it's not your fault. Are you ok?"

He nodded.

"Where's Noah?"

"He's outside.", he pointed to the door that led to the backyard, "I know you guys had a fight this morning but, please, Kelly, just talk to him, he's definitely not ok." I took a deep, shaky breath and, after hugging Dylan, I went to the backyard. I stepped outside and the first thing I noticed was the broken pieces by the grass. It was from a ceramic vase Noah had on the wooden table that was situated in the middle of the yard. I presumed he broke it when he arrived home in an attempt to get rid of some of the frustration. Then I looked to my left and saw him sitting on one of the wooden chairs that matches the table. His elbows were on his knees and his head was between his hands, that were gripping his hair. I felt nervous, for a lot of reasons. One, he looked mad and I hated when he got mad. Two, I didn't know how to approach him without scaring him. Three, I didn't know what to say or do because we had a fight and had yet to talk about it. But I guess that could wait, all I wanted was to hug the hell out of that man and fix him. So that's what I did. I walked in his direction and kneeled in front of him. He looked at me in a quick move, not expecting anyone to be there. I froze when I saw his face and, honestly, I just wanted to do the same to his dad (as if I had the chance, but my anger towards him was burning). He had bruises near his left eye, a cut on his lower lip and I could tell he bled from his nose but cleaned it up messly. He also had tears in his eyes that grew closer to falling as soon as he saw me. As if his state was a force calling for my help, I hugged him tight, my arms around his neck and one hand holding his head and massaging his hair, afraid he would disappear if I let go. Noah didn't exitate to hug me back, pulling me closer with his arms secured around my torso. He hid his face in my neck and broke down in tears and sobs.

🔸

CH 18

#cold hands #story #original story #angst #romance #oc #mentalpolaroids #noah centineo

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justkending · 4 years

Text

Starstruck. Chapter 1.

Summary: Bucky Barnes works at a hospital in NYC as an E.R. doctor. Him and his a group of his friends all plan a trip to Texas to attend ACL music festival. It’s not really Bucky’s scene, but one particular artist that is performing there is his celebrity crush, Y/N Blaire. Y/N is a country pop singer who is on the up and coming rise in the music industry. What’s to come of the two? Well, that’s for them to explore and you to find out...

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Y/N Blaire (Reader)

Word count: 4300+

A/N: This idea was one of those ones that once it came, there was no getting it out of my head. SO here we are actually putting it in writing. Hopefully I can give it the justice it deserves! Also, fair note to make, I recently went to ACL this year and this is where the idea kinda blossomed. I watched an amazing selection of all kinds of artist I already knew and some that I grew to love. I say this because Kacey Musgrave was one of those individuals and I haven’t stopped listening to her albums since I went, and I love her type of music as well as voice. So, each chapter will have a song that goes with it from her. In other words, the reader is based off of Kacey. Her type of music and voice are going to be what the reader characterizes as. Enjoy and let me know what you think!!!

NEW SERIES FOR A NEW YEAR!! HAPYY NEW YEAR!!!

Songs:

Enough- Alex Roe

Dime Store Cowgirl- Kacey Musgraves

Chapter 1:

“Come on! We have to hurry if we’re going to make it to the Honda stage!” Bucky grunted, maneuvering his way through 75,000 people that were also trying to get around the crowd.

He had taken the lead of the group with Clint, Wanda, Nat, and Steve following single filed.

“Bucky, slow down! The girls can’t push past as fast,” Steve shouted on the tail end of the line.

“I can hold my own, Steve.” Nat sassed sending him a playful glare.

He just chuckled, placing a hand on her back as he moved to the side for yet another person as they continued to sneak through everyone else.

Once they got to the middle of the park, where it was a lot more spacious, they all scoped out the stage they were looking for, seeing it was already filling up. The concert goers already standing to the back of the field. Clearly there were about 2-3 thousand people waiting for the next performer to go on.

“Damn it. We’re too late. We can’t get close to the stage,” Bucky mumbled upset that the one singer he wanted to see was going to have to be from a good distance.

“Who even is this girl and why is Barnes having a full on fangirl moment?” Clint chuckled getting an elbow to the ribs from Nat.

“She’s a really good artist,” Bucky rolled his eyes as they moved as close to the stage as possible.

“She’s an up and coming country pop singer,” Wanda spoke up.

“Country? Since when is Bucky into anything country? I thought he was into the old classics,” Clint scoffed.

“She’s the one exception. When he figured out she existed, that’s all that played in our apartment for 4 months,” Steve laughed. “I’m sure it didn’t stop though after he moved out.”

“Hey. You loved it and you know it,” Bucky pointed a finger at his best friend.

“She’s good. I’ll give you that.” Steve held out his hands up in surrender. “Clint, I’m sure you’ll like her.”

“Hey, I’m all for a little country music,” Clint replied.

“It’s a subtle country twinge to it though. Nothing overbearing,” Wanda added.

“Wanda, you a fan too?” Nat asked.

“Maybe not as much as Barnes here, but yes. I’ve listened to her for a while,” Wanda nodded.

“How much longer until she’s on?” Nat asked, turning to the stage.

“About 23 minutes,” Bucky said looking over everyone's heads as they got as close as they could without being squashed.

“It’s a good thing Sam couldn’t come. He would definitely be making some comments and jokes about your little obsession,” Clint chuckled under his breath.

“Shut up!” Bucky groaned. “She’s just really good and a good person.”

“Oh, so you’ve met her?” Steve nudged his arm with Bucky’s.

“No, but she isn't in any of the bad media,” Bucky answered. “Unlike her stupid boyfriend.”

“She has a boyfriend.” Wanda asked.

“Yeah, Quentin Beck. He’s an actor, but did a few albums a while back. He has a bad rap from the past. Big time party goer, manipulative, and always messed with peoples head making them think he was a good guy when he wasn’t. Complete dick from what I’ve heard.” Bucky crossed his arms looking ahead at the stage. “Apparently, he went through this whole life changing stage, and now he’s all sweet and generous. Of course, everyone thinks it’s cause Y/N had that effect on him.”

“Ok, has Barnes been internet stalking this girl forever or…” Clint said eyebrows raised.

“Shut up. I just keep up with the news and read, punk,” Bucky sent daggers Clint’s way.

“Whatever you want to call it man. I personally call it stalking.” Clint shrugged getting a shove from the dark haired man.

“Boys, cut it out.” Nat said stepping between the two. “If it wasn’t for this girl, we wouldn’t have got Bucky to come. So I say we enjoy her show, and stop teasing Barnes on his obvious crush.”

“It’s not a crush!” Bucky groaned.

“Sure cowboy. Sure thing,” Wanda patted his back with a wink getting a chuckle out of him before he wrapped an arm over her shoulder and gave her a squeeze.

“You’re the only one who gets me,” he smiled.

“Eh, what are friends for? Plus us Y/N Blaire fans got to stick together,” she winked at him.

Sure enough 23 minutes later, music began to play, and the crowd went crazy. Wanda squeezed Bucky’s waist looking up seeing him staring trying to find the singer he had come almost 2000 miles to see.

When they heard the crowd get even louder, they saw she had walked on in an outfit that screamed her, and her guitar thrown over her shoulder.

She was smiling and waving at the crowd with a giant genuine grin. Even though the group of friends were a really good distance away, the giant stadium sized screens on both sides of the stage showed her perfectly.

She was wearing a green leaf textured top that was short yet modest. Her skirt was what looked like an old renaissance painting in fabric form. She had bracelets up her arm, and necklaces hanging from her neck. Her hair thrown into a messy yet intricate braided style with a custom cowboy hat with a flat rim around it sew in with detailed embroidery.

“Her outfit is so cute.” Nat said leaning to look past Bucky and talk to Wanda.

“Her style is literally the best. It’s ranges from hippy/hipster with a twinge of country to itl. She done some fun things that you think would never work, but somehow look amazing on her!” Wanda agreed.

“Is that where you get your inspiration?” Nat laughed motioning to Wanda's witchy-hipster-vibe.

“I’d be proud to be compared to her,” she winked before turning back to the stage.

“Oh, my! Look at all you lovely people!” Y/N said into her mic that stood in a stand in front of her as she scanned the sea of individuals. “I would have never guessed to see this many people. Holy shit!” she laughed stepping back and putting her hand on her cheek as she listened to them scream.

“Ok, she’s pretty cute. I’ll give you that, Barnes,” Clint laughed getting a nod of agreement from Steve.

“Back off, Barton,” Bucky laughed back sending a teasing look.

“Sure... No crush at all...” Clint rolled his eyes playfully.

“As most of you probably know, Austin is one of my favorite places here in Texas beside my hometown,” Y/N continued and paused as the crowd screamed again making her laugh in the mic and making Bucky’s heart skip a beat at the sound. “And it’s crazy to think that a little over 5 years back, I was just a struggling artist doing small gigs in cafes and bars, and playing on the street for a little extra cash.” She let out a breath and held her hand to her heart. “It’s a dream to be asked to play here along with some AMAZING artist,” she emphasized. “Like. I honestly don’t know if this is real or if I’m going to wake up in a few minutes.” More cheers. “Anyway, you guys didn’t come here to hear me gawk at what my life is now, so let’s get a move on!” she said pumping her hand getting the loudest screams so far.

She turned to the rest of the band before counting down and starting to strum her guitar.

Everyone took in the performance with awe. Bucky especially, he sang along with Wanda on a few songs, but mainly just took in the moment listening to her and her voice.

He literally had never seen someone perform live so well and so gracefully. She was a great stage presence and got the crowd all riled up as the songs changed. She interacted with them stopping in between songs to talk to the crowd before leading to the next song. She was amazing. Absolutely stunning and Bucky’s stomach was overwhelmed with butterflies just having an experience with his friends like this.

“Ok, for this last song-” the crowd booed and let out sad shouts. “I know, I know. I don’t want it to end either, but someone else needs this stage,” she laughed taking off the guitar and grabbing her mic. “But I promise you’ll love me for this next part. I have a special guest that you may all know, that’s going to duet with me on this last song.” The crowd chanted waiting for the surprise. “Want to come out?” she turned to the side stage.

Everyone turned immediately shouting seeing who it was.

The crowd going crazy seeing Quintin Beck wave coming out with his own mic. Bucky not too enthused by him. Annoyed? Yeah for sure. But it was because this guy had a bad reputation and he didn’t quite understand someone like Y/N who was known for her kindness being with a gaslighter.

“Hey everyone!” he smiled coming out and moving straight to Y/N taking her in a long hug. He turned back to the crowd with his arm still around her waist and smiled. “How’s everyone doing tonight?” Screams. “I would be too if you get to hear this angel sing,” he winked at her getting a loud awe from the people.

“How do you feel about giving them a special duet?” she giggled leaning her head on his shoulders.

Though a simple action, something in Bucky’s body cringed.

“I’d say they shouted enough for it,” he smiled at her before she nodded to the band and they started back up.

They began singing one of Beck’s songs together. It was a slower love song called Enough. He had recorded it a while back, but when they started dating, they re-did it making it top of the charts for a while.

Her voice always seemed to be so smooth and easy going. Bucky hated to admit it, but Quintin voice mixed well into the song. Especially when she came in and harmonized. He didn’t think it was possible for it to sound more perfect, but the harmony smacked him in the face. Probably doing the same to everyone else.

When they finished they did a small bow, and the crowd began chanting for them to kiss. Making Bucky let out a groan and look away.

“Jealous, Buck?” Steve leaned in with a chuckle.

“Shut up, punk.” he said looking back up and seeing Quintin just land a subtle kiss to her cheek making the concert goers whoop and holler.

“Whatever, Jerk,” Steve laughed.

“You’ve all be amazing! I hope you all enjoy the rest of the concerts! I heard my friend Kacey Musgraves is here, so I may need to join you in watching her!” she winked at one of the camera. “I love you ya’ll! Have a great and safe night! Thank you!” she waved walking back and disappearing with Quintin already waiting on the side for her.

“Ok, let’s head to The Cure before heading back to the hotel. They’re one of the last acts tonight.” Nat said pushing the boys to the next stage in hopes of getting there a little bit sooner than others.

“So, what’d you think Clint? Still going to make fun of me for liking her?” Buck asked, smacking his friends back.

“I’ll give it to you, Barnes. She’s cute, talented, and seems like a sweet person. You’ve got good taste,” Clinton laughed.

“Told ya.”

“I think you just added to her fan club, Buck.” Steve winked.

They all laughed as they worked their way through the crowd for the last concert of the night. Only one more day to go then it was back to work for all of them.

_______

The last day of ACL had been exhausting to say the least. They were planning on leaving before the festival ended, so they had taken the first half of the day to venture downtown Austin. They had just finished lunch at a pizza place, and the girls said they wanted to do a little shopping down the strip before heading back to the concerts.

“How long does it take to look through one tiny shop?” Bucky groaned as they stood outside another boutique.

“You don’t shop with girls very often, do you?” Steve laughed.

“I’m sorry I don’t have a girlfriend. I have a pretty demanding job and haven't fully settled with it enough to get a girlfriend,” Bucky sassed.

“You’ve been an ER doctor for over 7 years. I would hope by now you have some kind of grasp on the job,” Clint snorted.

“You’re a cop, Barton. It’s not as easy as the people on TV make it look,” Bucky retorted.

“I’m Captain of a precinct. It’s a little more work than a cop.” Clint rolled his eyes. “Plus, I still make time for Laura, don’t I?”

“You were high school sweethearts.”

“You’re point?”

“Come on Buck. When’s the last time you even went out on a date?” Steve nudged him. “Peggy has friends she can set you up with.”

“We’ve tried that already, remember? The girl had the color scheme of our wedding, and the name of our imaginary kids already picked out by the second rounds of drink.” Buck huffed.

“Yeah, she was a little intense,” Steve pursed his lips as he rocked on his heels. “That may have been one of the new girls at Peggy’s office that she was just trying to introduce to new friends. She ended up being a little too clingy for all of us.”

“You think?” Bucky snorted.

“What about-”

“What about I go into this quiet and empty bookstore, and as soon as the girls are done, you can come and get me?” he didn’t wait for an answer since he was over them trying to set him up once again. “You know Nat’s single too! Why don’t you try setting her up with someone?”

He huffed as he walked into the close-to-empty small book store. Only about 3 people in there. He let out a sigh as he ran his hand over his face, and walked to the back of the store.

Just as he was rounding the corner, he hit a smaller body turning the same corner.

“Oh god! I’m so sorry!” the woman said moving to grab the books in her hand and keep them from falling.

Bucky reacted quickly and put his hands on the same book making it to where his larger hands were covering the woman’s smaller ones in support.

“No, no! That’s my fault, doll.” he awkwardly chuckled as he tried looking at her face, but she was wearing a felt floppy hat covering her features. “You ok?”

She finally looked up once the books were steady in her hands, and smiled up at him. His heart stopped instantly.

No. Way.

“Doll? Cute little pet name, Sweetheart,” she replied back with a sweet and soft southern accent.

“Y-You’re- Y-” he began stuttering and her face slightly dropped from smiling, to nervous.

“Oh, please don’t shout or something,” she whispered adjusting the books in her hand and the hat on her head. “I take it you’re a fan,” she smiled softly at him.

Holy shit, she was more beautiful up close. Even all those album covers with her hair and makeup all done, and the little photoshoots from the magazines didn’t do her justice in person.

“Uh, yeah,” he let out a chuckle. “But don’t worry. I won’t cause a scene,” he said turning back to see the store was still vacant practically. Somehow his voice not staggering now.

“I appreciate it,” she smiled looking over his shoulder. “Us ‘famous people’ still do normal human stuff too. Believe it or not,” she winked at him making his heart actually flutter.

“No, no, Ha. I believe it. But, uh this is a pretty popular part of town. Why here?” he asked moving to where he was blocking anyone from behind them to see her. She caught the gesture and her smile grew at it knowing his kind intentions. “I mean especially during ACL. More people souvenir shopping.”

“Very true,” she giggled. “But uh, I don’t get to come back to Austin very often, and this my favorite little bookstore. Thought while I was in town…” she shrugged.

“I see,” he chuckled.

“That plus, most people skip the book store and go straight for the overpriced boutiques,” she joked.

“Shame too. Who wouldn’t want a book from a new city?” he said crossing his arms.

How was he so calm around her? He had been a fan of hers for years. Shouldn’t he be a nervous, sweating, stuttering wreck. I mean sure his heart was beating about 100x more than it should of, but he was having easy conversation somehow.

“Right?” she breathed out a soft laugh. “God. Someone who gets it,” she grinned.

“I’m, uh, I’m Bucky,” he said putting a hand out and offering it to her.

“Y/N. But I’m sure you already knew that,” she chuckled again before taking his hand with her free one. “You from around here, Bucky?”

“No actually. My friends and I came down from New York,” he said regretfully taking his hand back, but it would be weird to hold onto it longer. Right?

“New York? That’s quite the trip. Tell me you flew, and didn’t drive the whole way.” she said raising an eyebrow.

“No, flying was definitely the only way my friends would have got me here. I don’t think they could handle 26 hours in the car ride here,” he laughed making her join him. God, he wanted to make her make that sound about 5687 more times.

“Not a big road trip person?” she asked.

“No, I’m a big road trip fan. I think a little too much sometimes. They probably would have been annoyed of me halfway here.”

“Same here. I can be a little too cheery in a tight car,” she said.

“Blaire!” Someone from behind yelled. “We gotta get moving. We got a busy schedule today, and we have to drop Quin off at the airport.”

She looked over Bucky’s shoulder seeing a man in jeans and a t-shirt, but fancy sunglasses and a phone to his ear.

“Ok, be right there,” she nodded. She turned back to Bucky and sent him an apologetic smile. “It was nice talking to you Bucky, but the superstar life doesn’t rest unfortunately.” she shrugged.

“No, no. Go ahead. I’m sure you have better things to do than talk to a stranger in a bookstore,” he chuckled awkwardly.

“I don’t know. This was turning out to be an interesting little conversation Bucky,” she grinned, and he about burst at her saying his name again. “You going to the last day of ACL?” she said, moving around him but still looking to him.

“Uh, yeah. My friends and I are going to head that way soon,” he nodded.

“Well, little tip. If you have a chance, go check out Kacey Musgrave’s stage if you can. I heard there’s going to be a little surprise,” she winked before turning and walking back to the desk.

Bucky watched as she checked out and talked to the man that had called on her earlier. Just as she was leaving though, she turned back looking for him and sent him a small wave. He returned it and she smiled one more time making him actually melt into his spot before disappearing.

“Dude, we called you like 5x times. What took you so long? I was about to go in there and hunt you down,” Steve said seeing Bucky in a dazed face with a stupid grin on his face. “Buck, what’s going on with you?”

_____

They went ahead and headed to the music festival for the last few concerts before flying back home. Bucky explained to them what had happened and how he had had a full conversation with the Y/N Blaire, but no one believed him but Wanda. Either that or they were just messing with him to irritate him. They just kept teasing him about how he was daydreaming and thinking up scenarios he just WANTED to happen.

“Ok, so Kacey Musgrave next?” Nat asked as they were walking around.

“Yeah, I think that’s the last one we have time for before heading out,” Steve nodded.

“Y/N said there was going to be a big surprise at her show too. I think it’s a good note to end on,” Bucky spoke up.

“Sureeee thing, Barnes. Y/N probably did say that,” Clint winked elbowing his friend.

“Barton, I swear if you keep joking around about not believing me, I’ll punch you so hard and leave you passed out on the grass for some drunk person to throw up on you,” Bucky groaned over the teasing.

“Give him a break guys. The man met the love of his life. You can’t blame him for being so awestruck he forgot to get proof of it,” Wanda patted his back reassuring him.

“Thanks Wanda,” he smiled at the one person who didn’t annoy him to no end. “Wait-”

“Let’s go guys. If we want a good spot at least,” Nat laughed waving them on.

They ended up getting a good spot pretty close to the gate. Sure it was about 40-50ft away from it, but that was good for ACL’s crowds.

Kacey came out eventually and did an amazing performance. Her stage lit up with pastels and whimsical colors.

“Okay everyone! As you know, I grew up in a small town in Texas, and I’m not the only artist performing here this week who did,” she smiled on the big screen getting the crowd to scream.

“No fucking way,” Bucky muttered to himself, but Steve heard and turned to him.

“What?” Steve said watching his friends mouth drop and Wanda’s doing the same. “Wanda, what am I missing?”

“This girl and I actually grew up just a few towns away from each other. Little did we know, that we hung out with each other through mutual friends a few times. But who would’ve thought we would be here together?” Kacey laughed. “So without further ado. I have a little guest star that’s going to sing an older song of mine. Y/N/N, you wanna come out here and say hi?” she motioned to the side stage like Y/N had with Quintin.

The crowd going nuts once more.

“Hey!” she waved in a new attire. “How are y'all doing?” Again more shouts and screams of excitement.

“Well, would you look at that? Maybe Bucky did meet her,” Steve chuckled lightly, picking up on the surprise that she had supposedly told him about.

“I told you, punk!” Bucky said pointing a finger. “Take that asshole,” he said turning to Clint who was just laughing hysterically.

“If there is one song that I can fully relate to that Miss. Kacey has created, it’s Dime Store Cowgirl. Small town southern girls, am I right?” Y/N grinned.

“Shall we then?” Kacey asked.

“Oh. We shall,” Y/N smiled giving her a side hug before they both pulled back and waved to the band signaling the song.

Everyone screaming and shouting the song with the two. Then just as fast as it happened, Y/N and Kacey were bowing and saying their final goodbyes with a few blown kisses to the crowd.

“Goodnight Austin! I love you!” Kacey screamed as they left side by side. Y/N blowing kisses as they walked.

The crew packed up and left that night. Heading back to the real world unfortunately. All Bucky could think about was how he would probably never see Y/N again. Not like he did in the bookstore at least.

Nope. That was a one time thing, and quite honestly he wondered if it was all a dream. Maybe she would come to NYC soon, and he could see her in concert again. It wouldn’t be the same, but it would be better than never seeing her in person again. Right?

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peaches-of-1 · 6 years

Text

Yoongi- Flower Shop!AU

Male!Reader x Florist!Yoongi

Yoongi had worked so hard to finally set up his shop with his best friend in the world, Namjoon. It was opening week, and they were both so nervous. They’d offer bouquets for weddings and other events. So much money had gone into this. So many loans and help from other friends and family that they really needed to succeed, or they’d be in deep debt.

The store would be called [Once and Floral/Take it or Leave it/What in Carnation] as a pun, because that way it’d catch on faster. Yoongi’s hands were covered in dirt as the two men set up some hanging plants and a curious kitten watched them from the sidewalk.

“Namjoon, be careful on the ladder. I don’t want anything or anyone to get broken beyond repair before we even open our doors.”

“I’ll be fine. You worry too much.”

“With good reason.” Yoongi shot back with a smile.

The younger of the two got onto the ladder and his hyung handed him a potted succelent to hang up. When it was secure, they moved onto the next one. The cat came inside to watch and jumped onto stool.

Before they knew it, opening day arrived and it wasn’t too busy. It was spring, so they’d be getting business soon, right? They were nervous that no one would come in other than their friends and family who would be there just to support them. He sort of wondered where that kitten was who had been there nearly every day.

“You lookin for the cat too?” Namjoon asked.

“Yeah. I was gonna give it some cat nip. I don’t see it, though.”

Then the door opened and he walked in with the kitten. Yoongi couldn’t believe how handsome the man was. He lit up the room and made Yoongi feel like it was just the two of them in that room when the guy approached him with the kitten in hand.

“So, you own his shop?”

Yoongi wanted to say he was right, but the words wouldn’t come out. He just stared at the attractive face before him.

Namjoon answered, “Yes. We both own it. Welcome! What’s your name?”

“My name is (Y/n). It’s nice to meet you.”

“Is this little fella yours?”

“Yeah, she’s been running away for the past week. This time I followed her to figure out where she’s been going to. Her name is Yoonji, and she’s a fickle little thing.”

They smiled and Yoongi laughed and reached out for the kitten, “So, you’re not a stray after all, huh Yoongi. We also have similar names. Ah, I’ve got a gift for you if your dad will allow it.”

Yoongi met (Y/N)’s eyes and looked back at the kitten, “It’s cat nip. You were just so fun to have around, I wanted to give you a gift.”

Making his voice higher, the handsome stranger replied as Yoongi, “I don’t care what papa says, so can I have some. Please???”

They laughed and Yoongi went to get it from the back room. It was freshly grown and put into a small pouch. He took this time to make it a bit prettier than he was originally intending to do. This man was so good looking, his cat deserved something nice too. Yoongi caught his breath.

Why was he so cute? It amazed him how smitten he was all of a sudden, especially with all the friends he had small crushes on. Out of the blue, they no longer seemed to matter. He really wanted to impress (Y/N).

Once Yoongi got back to him, Yoonji’s ears went up and she started to purr and reach out for the pouch. Namjoon gone off to help some potential customers. The first 100 would get a free pack of vegetable seeds and a special pot with the business’s logo on it. She rubbed her cheek against the gift.

“I think she likes it.” (Y/N) smiled.

“You gonna stick around? I can show you around the store and tell me if there’s anything you like.”

(Y/N) liked that idea and was shown around by the man he just met. Yoongi payed closed attention to what he seemed to like while the kitten purred away in his arms. He told the story of how they got started, trying to do a sales pitch but also the cutie seemed like he was really interested in what he was saying.

The bell went off. They had gotten their first sale! A dozen roses for a girl dressed in a dark and flowing outfit. She smiled when all attention was put on her and everyone cheered. They got a free vase along with their purchase since they were the first along with the pot and seeds.

The owners got a picture with the gothic girl as well for memory’s sake. Yoongi then returned with to the man.

“So, you live nearby?”

“Yeah, yes.” The guy said. “We’re a few blocks away, but we don’t come this way very often.”

Yoongi nodded, “Cuz the shops are mostly on the other side.”

He agreed, “Exactly, but I think we’ll be coming here more often. Won’t we, Yoonji?”

She was still purring away but gave a small mew at her name. (Y/N) decided to get an aloe vera plant as well as some colorful Bromeliads to go inside his apartment. As a salesman, Yoongi persuaded the cute man to also get some orchids.

“I’ll get them wrapped, too. Something simple.”

“Absolutely.” Yoongi grinned and moved over to the counter, wrapping the purple beauties in gray paper and tying it closed with a pinkish bow.

As the man watched the skillful work, Yoongi noticed the contrast of their hands. The florist was pale compared to him.

“You’re really good with your hands.” He said in awe.

“Thanks.” Yoongi blushed. “You said you lived nearby?”

He lived on the fourth floor, so it was a beautiful view of nightlife. Yoongi joked that he might come visit as they moved towards the cash register to get the flowers paid for with the pot and seeds.

“That’d be fun. I’ll have to ask my boyfriend first.”

The playful smile left Yoongi’s face, “B-boyfriend you say?”

“Yep. Been dating four months now? I’ll probably get flowers for our 6th month anniversary here when that happens.”

Yoongi felt kind of sad, but it was just a crush anyways, “Oh, well. Congrats ahead of time. Thanks for stopping by, (Y/N). See you around, Yoonji.”

He opened the door for the man who had his arms full and waved goodbye to them. His face fell into a pouty relaxed state. Well that was a train wreck, he thought to himself and went back inside to help others. Then it was closing time. The two men went their seperate ways to get some rest for tomorrow.

Yoongi yawned as he was the first one at the store. Yoonji was waiting at the door, and the two greeted each other. She came by every day. Sometimes she brought a friend or two. Children came to the store more to greet her and pet her. Sometimes (Y/N) would show up and check in, buying flowers or planting tools he needed. He’d talk about his boyfriend too.

It would be their six month anniversary, and (Y/N) wanted Yoongi to be the one to make a love bouquet for them. Their was one on their menu, but he didn’t want that for his darling.

“It has to be unique. Special, like my love him. Reds and pinks, maybe whites. He likes blue, so maybe some of that?”

Yoongi gave a smile even though seeing him all the time and hearing about his heart belonging to someone else hurt a bunch. It brought pain into his heart, but as long as he could see him it’d be ok. Right?

That’s what he thought as Yoonji hopped up on one of the tables and rested in the sunlight while he made his love’s bouquet. Red carnations, a few pink peonies, blue orchids around the edges, with oxeye daisies sprinkled throughout. Everything he thought about (Y/N), and he’d be giving it to someone else.

The young man sighed, taking his gloves off and putting the arrangement on the shelf. He sent the official text saying that it was ready. Yoongi went over to his kitty counterpart and rubbed her fur, letting her climb up into his lap as he sat in a lower chair behind the counter. The “In Bloom” sign still burning bright to signify that they were open.

Namjoon was sick today, so it was just Yoongi and Yoonji and the sun and a million plants.

“You’re lucky, you know that?” He said to her. “Not only do you get to do whatever you want whenever you want like sleep or go for a walk, but you also live with (Y/N). I’d do anything to be able to be held by him like you constantly are.”

Yoonji purred.

He kept talking, “I really like him, you know? I have a huge crush on him, but he’s got a boyfriend. It’s crazy, right? Still. I’d like to at least be his friends if we aren’t able to date one another. Any excuse to be near him. That’s why you’re so lucky. You know what he likes and dislikes better than anyone. I’d love to be (Y/N)’s kitten.”

“Would you really?”

The voice made Yoongi jump and the kitten jumped to the counter and into her owner’s arms to purr against him. A fierce blush started to paint itself across the florist’s cheeks.

He wasn’t sure what to say, “I...I didn’t hear you come in.” He couldn’t meet the handsome customer’s face as so many thoughts of fear and embarrassment ran though his mind.

“Bell’s broken.” (Y/N) sniffled.

Yoongi looked up to see his eyes swollen and more red than usual even with his allergies to some of the exotic plants the store provided.

“Are you--?”

“We broke up.” He admitted. “I got your text and we started arguing. He said I spent too much time here instead of with him. I’d told him about you and he said that it was beacause...because I had a crush on you.”

The florist’s fragile heart grasped onto this seed of hope, “And?”

He bit his lip, “I said he was wrong...”

Yoongi looked down, of course.

“But I’m not sure if he was.” He paced a bit. “I came down here even though I could’ve just texted you back and said to cancel the order. Instead I really just wanted to see you.”

Alarm bells of confusion went off in Yoongi’s head as he went to the other side of the counter, “I think you should go. Try to fix things with your boyfriend. I’m not gonna be your rebound, so I think it’d just be better if you just left.”

“Do you really feel that way, kitten?”

The blush got brighter, “D-don’t call me that.” he pouted.

“And why not? You seemed to like it.”

He did, “I just don’t think this is right. I’m not just gonna date you because you broke up with your boyfriend on your 6th month anniversary and you’re looking for someone to replace him.”

(Y/N) replied, “Then don’t.” and approached Yoongi. “I’ll wait a while to see if this feeling stays, but I’ve been coming over almost every day for you. Yoonji could’ve run away anywhere but chose here. She chose you, and she hissed at him all the time. She’s smarter than me.”

“So?”

“So, I wanted to be with you the moment I saw you, Yoongi. I will be serious about our relationship. You’re not a rebound or anything like that.” He looked around the shop and handed Yoongi a red tulip.

Yoongi’s face almost matched it, “You paid attention.” He said, biting his lip.

He would blabber on and on about the meanings of flowers when they were together, just chatting. (Y/N) seemed interested enough, and it was something that Yoongi loved. Red tulips were for “undying love”

“This is how I feel about you now. I’ll buy a flower everyday to show you how serious I am. If it ever changes, we can stop whatever it is that happens from this moment on.”

(Y/N) decided to head out with his kitty Yoonji in his arms. Yoongi looked down at the tulip and told him to wait. Going to a bucket of carnations, he picked out a white one and gave it to the man. Devotion. The man smiled at the paler and shorter florist.

It had been nearly two months now, and red tulips flooded Yoongi’s apartment so much so that (Y/N) would just point to the flower that expressed his feelings for that day.

“I get it, darling. Ok, I believe it. You love me. I’m not a rebound or anything like that. That being said, will you go on a date with me?”

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acquagalaxies · 5 years

Text

my bits for “Together Alone”

It’s incredible how much happened in just 11 minutes, as It’s difficult to even decide where to start. Hard was also to not scream every 0.5 seconds for all the things the crewniverse and miss Sugar dropped in. Since already many of us covered up a lot of the stuff that have been proposed in a marvelous way, with all the references of the case, I’d just write down some thoughts I had in mind. to join my rant about an episode that blow my mind and try to talk calm-

THEY LITERALLY CONFIRMED THE “WHITE PEARL/ONCE PINK PEARL” THEORY IN THE FIRST FEW SECONDS CARTOON NETWORK U WANT ME TO DIE I HAD A STROKE SOMEONE HOLD ME I CAN BEAR THIS WITH MY ONLY STRENGH.

Ehm. So. What is presented to us I think is something like we saw in “Jungle Moon”: one of Pink Diamond’s past memories that appears in the shape of a dream, distorted by Steven’s mind (since, is in fact a dream and not just a vision/hallucination), which is a normal thing while one is dreaming, the brain in the unconscious state works and interprets things in a little bit different way, especially when it comes to memories: in the dream world the situation can take some sort of “surreal” twist that of course changes from what happened in reality and from what you remember consciously, in this case Yellow Diamond’s massively long neck (I wonder if the crewniverse is aware of the fandom’s YD giraffe neck meme and add it on purpose).

(the fact this all could have been a dream is evident already by the very first frame of the episode, when we see all the Diamonds’ ships on Homeworld perfectly intact, this alone made me confused at first for how strange and impossible it was, since we all know Yellow and Blue had to leave their ships on Earth for their being broken at the moment due to the events of Reunited.)

Aside that, the moment I loved the most is watching the complicity between Steven and this pearl (pretending to perform their role as what they’re supposed to do/be in front of others, satisfying their expectations so said others would not have anything to argue with, like Yellow smiling seeing everything seems to be at its right place, and when they’re alone again goofing around happily) that is just an altered reflection from the memory, in this case what is really shown is the bond Pink Diamond shared with who seems to be confirmed as her former pearl.

I couldn’t hold only inside a smile, because it’s heart-warming seeing this kind of relationship with someone else, with happy moments, laughter and bubbles, you can see that Pink treated her pearl like a close friend and most important, like an equal (many gems should take this behavior as a suggestion and moral model, but it’s very hard in their so hierarchical society to treat “lower gems” as your peer). By watching first the Jungle Moon flashback and Legs from here to Homeworld, I feared the physical damage that the now-white-pearl shows is the result of Pink Diamond’s infamous bursts of rage (since the first time she is introduced in Jungle Moon, Pink seemed used to this bad temper from what is seen to us, by this “brat and capricious behavior” of going around hitting things bc your parents didn’t give to you what you’re whining for) ended bad. I’m glad to see otherwise it’s apparently not Pink’s direct fault after all instead, the two seemed to share a more than good relationship.

(little thought: the way Steven lands graciously on the floor after his juggler number sweetly reminds me a bit when the young Greg met Rose in the old temple after their conversation on the beach.)

By this carefree spirit of hers and peaceful kind attitude, even a bit childish, the other diamonds maybe thought that was the pearl being a “bad influence” for Pink, deciding after to replace her with another (that’s why it is a little heart-breaking in now we’re only falling apart while Pink is trying to have a conversation with Pearl, she probably missed that complicity and the chatty moments with her old pearl, and because she wanted them to be friends and buddies, not just servant and master, encouraging Pearl to have her own thoughts and be self-conscious).

• but why keeping a broken pearl and not directly get rid of if the society cares so much of maintain only perfectly functional gems? What if White decided to keep Pink/White Pearl to make her be a constant walking reminder to Pink Diamond of who is really the one who commands and of what could happen if she tries again to make a gem behaving “different from how she is supposed to be and do”, or treats them differently from “the value” they own (like treating Pink Pearl an equal despite pearls are considered so much less, especially compared to a diamond). That’s creepy enough, I question if White was so cruel to make Pink watching while her so loved Pearl and (only real) friend turns from that pink fluffy sunshine ball into an empty shell smiling puppet without anything else left, ripped away from thoughts and individuality, a perfect obedient servant that would never get against your authority or retort your words.

The even sadder thing is, even if Steven will succeed in “bringing” back white pearl at her old self (something still welcomed just sayin’, #save the precious), still Pink Diamond, her diamond, the gem she was made for and with she shared that bond, is not here anymore.

Pink pearl has cinnamon buns on her hair bc like them she’s a cinnamon roll herself.

another heart-breaking detail is, by hearing them laugh, the voice getting from Pink Pearl’s mouth is patently Deedee Magno Hall’s, so Pearl’s supposed-to-be true voice. I’m weeping.

Then everything, pinkish and joyful, slowly becomes a grey dull nightmare, with Pink Pearl fading away into the void. Puking hair (whatever your own or someone else’s) in a dream often is the representation of the desire of expression about something that is denied. The will of wanting to express and be yourself that instead is being repressed (by someone, some situation, ecc.). Or can also representing, in this particular case, White Diamond trying to push outside by force Rose Quartz’s persona/facade, a fake self, away from her Starlight.

Also, we’re finally able to see White’s hands (nails rigorously polished, I adore, as the cloak, so in style). Is not such important stuff but I appreciated that.

The pebbles are so adorable, they seems to love Pink Diamond’s very much (probably she was the only one that treat them decently, since apparently the word “pebble” is used in gem language also as a not-so-kind epithet? See Peridot using it with Steven when she was released from the bubble seasons ago), and I found ��somehow cute (?) hearing one of them exclaiming “Pink is moving again” (which is totally reasonable since gems don’t have total acknowledge of what dreams are and what means sleeping in general, since is not something needful to them as is resting for organic beings). Plus, they apparently became attached at Connie too, that’s so sweet. Just to add, the green male pebble (which is also incredible to see a “kind” of gem being a “he”) chilling with Steven’s phone from the previous episode is so #icon. I love these little creatures.

“It almost feels like home” just being immediately replied with Garnet underlining embittered “almost” like to precise no matter how much the pebbles make the furnishing resembling as much as they can the real ones from Steven’s house back on Earth, still is not really “home”.

That grasps my heart a bit by hearing Blue Diamond, so emotionally and happily, announced than “we haven’t had Pink in 6000 years!”, since they still believe the one in front of them is always Pink Diamond and can’t well comprehend yet this aspect is not just a form Pink shapes for her amusement (just listening Yellow saying to her pearl “help her since she seems to have so much trouble recalling her past here on Homeworld”. But time to time), and getting worried this choice would not be liked by White, labeled as one of Pink’s usual childish jokes.

Ok but, someone pointed out that, “if the Diamond don’t throw a ball from 6000 years, then what about the Cosmic Jubilee Lars crashed in?” Well good question, I guess that is categorized as some kind of another event to participate at? I don’t think from Pink Diamond’s demise they never threw any party for other celebrations (a new colonial conquering for example).

Steven in the pink diamond’s outfit is a babe. It gives me the impression he actually wears It better than his mother.

What Yellow Pearl means exactly with “accept” or “reject” the members of Steven’s court? And… what happen to the ones that has been rejected from their diamonds?

Just realizing White’s throne other being of her dominant white shade, it actually reflects the colors of yellow, blue and pink, in the spots they’re placed the other thrones. Beside than being pretty aesthetical, it’s calling me the fact real life pure diamonds, reflecting the light, could do those spectacles of colors and reflections.

“Everyone stay where they belong” and Steven immediately floats near his friends and family. Bae. smol beam of sunshine.

I really loved the explanation of what means to have “fun”, something you like to do, could it even be a passion or a simple playtime, for the good feelings it brings to you.

The pearls interactions, and the discovering of Blue Pearl’s hobby for drawing and Yellow’s for being a model just gives me life. I love the pearls and still want to learn more about their dynamics. Still, one of the moments that gives me chills is YP saying that “her feelings don’t matter” and how proudly she actually said it. Not gonna be surprised, we all know the conditions and how the pearls are considered in Homeworld society, as I know how much YP worships her diamond and how she considers herself lucky by having the “privilege” to serve the maximum rank of all gems. But still, it’s sad hearing someone states something like that without a problem.

OK SO. Since the very first Diamond Days trailer I was curious about one scene in particular: the one in which Blue Diamond separates with such brutality Steven from the group. I didn’t want to speculate about this just because I wanted first the context of the situation, and after seeing it… it actually makes more sense. I know people addressed this as Blue having a bitchy behavior because apparently she doesn’t want a Diamond that mingles herself with other gems (that compared to said Diamond, still remain lower beings, is like don’t wanting the princess of a country to get along with the farmers and peasants), but now it’s kinda reasonable? I mean, it’s still hurtful, but since White Diamond would be there, she’s afraid the gem matriarch would not be happy to see this kind out-of-the-rules behavior, and I’m sure no one would ever want to see White angry, am I wrong? Blue someways tries to protect Steven (and everyone’s asses) from doing a mistake in front of WD that could cost them. Still, it’s just the impression all the scene gave me, maybe I’m wrong.

NO NO BLUE, I UNDERSTAND YOU CAN’T FULLY COMPREHEND THE EARTH AND THE HUMAN HABITS, HOW ALL THERE WORK, CHANGE AND GROW, THAT IS SOMETHING BEYOND YOUR USUAL KNOWLEDGE, BUT DON’T DARE TO ADRESS CONNIE A SECOND TIME AS A “PET”, ‘kay?? Maybe she doesn’t do it through malice, but I really want episodes in which Steven teaches them with kindness and patience the beauties and worth of Earth, the things Pink Diamonds saw in the nature and its creatures, what took her to re-think her colonial project to preserve all of this, how magnificent and so different can be life, the organic beings, to change their consideration of them as inferior, they (we) just have another ways to live, to think and to do, that’s all. And when it comes talking about Amethyst…

“oh boy, here it comes…”

I know millions already talked and pointed out this but, I’m so proud of the character development Amethyst is showing to us, already from the Heart of Crystal Gems arc. She has let behind her shoulders all the struggle, the feeling out of place, “wrong”, for being so different from the other quartz soldiers (“different” doesn’t mean “wrong”, and this is a very important teaching); she matures and understood it’s as alright as the way she is, and mean words from others is not worth her consideration, her tears, anymore, while in the past the same situation and phrases would have back the reaction to burst into trembling fury or silent crying.

From this dialogue whatever, it makes me consider one thing, probably “overcooked” gems seem not to be that much of scandal and dishonor (unless, Blue would have made more fussing about Amethyst and not allowed her into the ball in the first place): as long as they are, even with their “disabilities” and disadvantages, functional and useful for the society, it’s more or less consented and accepted. To not forget, Era 02 was for Homeworld a time of crisis in the production of gems due to less resources, so it’s not so shocked to see gems like Amethyst, or our Peridot, with less compared to the Era 01 gems, but still capable to fulfil a purpose.

Blue, for goddammit sake, let Garnet alone, together alone, thank you. at least, I’m content they included in this episode more lore, talking about the other types of “Garnets” presented on this planet: the Hessonites, of which we already have some acknowledge, thanks to the name dropped previously in Legs from Here to Homeworld and the contribution of the “Save the light” game, that gives us clues on how they look like (someone else, beside me, prays to have the pleasure to see the same Hessonite from the game in the show? That would be cool, I can’t deny);

but also the Demantoids

And the Pyropes

However, who Blue just listed apparently are not invited at the ball. I’m not sure what kind of gems the ones presented above are, but they don’t seem to be Garnets however (the designs of those on the left – the green/yellow group – are kinda fascinating, not the same in my tastes for the ones on the right, but it concerns almost the “Thomas the Tank Engine” gems. Bad design in my opinion, but good memes for that. Interesting the choice to their “skirts” resembling gears, reminding Homeworld reflects a perfectly mechanic system where everyone has its specific place and purpose, working as, in fact, a gear in this immense society, and by fulfilling that purpose, this said society moves on and on, like a huge mechanism moved by the work of every single of its components – it’s also directly/indirectly underlined by their dancing afterwards, especially in the shooting sequence from above).

Look, look how many beautiful Garnets. Jokes aside, I’m really happy having the chance to see other sapphires (other rubies would same welcomed, of course), I already get in sympathy the cheek-gem one and the other few steps behind with a similar hairstyle like our Sapphire, but shorter:

oooh look these sapphires that never saw it comiiiiing

This is a one more time love for Garnet: even if she says moments before she’d not come, annoyed and angry for Blue Diamond’s talk to follow with head down the rules, she decides to do it for Steven, as Connie suggested, to give him the maximum support at the point to stay unfused for him. This, is real love too.

Aaand now here it comes the Diamonds!! Spectacular entry on the red carpet. Yellow is particular amused about how the project of the ball turned out, complimenting with Pink/Steven for the result (if she arrives to the point to congratulate with you and said that your idea is brilliant, you really did a good job then).

(same we could say for the future episodes)

E X T R A diamonds posing the way of their murals portrait.

as it is releasing sparkles and shimmers through the throne room at your subjects. because they’re glimmering and magnificent (shine like a diamond 🎶)

Icons. I adore. I can’t blame the random crow gem dropping tears, it’s so relatable I’d do the same.

Or the other one getting thrilled by the entrance of Yellow Diamond. I can’t blame her either.

But honestly, dat blue diamond hips sway. She is so elegant in her postures, a queen.

I know it sound so out of contest in the current talking but damn, Blue Diamond’s voice is so ASMR, soft and gentle. I especially feel nice chills hearing her says “you’re doing great”. Just. Fantastic.

“White Diamond… has more important things to attend to” but 🙃, for real bro? It’s fucking new Homeworld Era ball. Pink Diamond return!! guess it’s important???? Poor Steven, he was so hopeful to catch the opportunity to finally talk to her (comparing my reaction with his when this was announced you won’t find any difference)

“Therefore, I will be here to observe in her place.”

How nobody says nothing about? a P-E-A-R-L that has the permission to stay on her diamond’s throne and be presented at her diamond’s place in sostitution. I don’t believe is something allowed to the other pearls (owed by a diamond or another high rank gem), to substitute their master and sit on their place during these events, even for Yellow P. or Blue P., or even our Pearl in her time on Homeowrld at the service of Pink Diamond. But maybe due to being the pearl of the most important Diamond and, if it’s her Diamond that orders her, it’s understandable and accepted. Dunno buddies.

Also, among all these crowds, it makes me remember Zircon’s words at the trial of what kind of gems were once in Pink Diamond’s entourage: where are the Agates, since there’re amethysts and quartz soldiers in attendance. Wasn’t their job to keep them on the line? And those sapphires? Are Pink Diamond’s? Or, since sapphires are considered aristocratic and not so common gems, this small group represent the only and all sapphires in the entire Homeworld? Another question, if not and there’d be others to meet, all Homeworld!Sapphires are all like classical blue sapphires or exist others of different types, like Padparadscha, but without being “off-colors”?

Plus, I’m sure the green/yellow gems are not from PD’s court but from Blue and Yellow’s (tiny hinted by those two react with emotion at their entrance, and we don’t see them greeting Pink like the other group do), but… there is none White Diamond’s gems (except the pearl, of course). After all, Yellow Pearl said gems by the Diamonds are accepted or rejected. Think about it, maybe it’s why there’re no white gems…

But seriously tho, does White Diamond actually have her own court or directly ALL the entire society with all its gems is considered as “her court”, the other Diamonds included? Since her being the Mother of all gem kind and its supreme ruler, that would actually make more sense than the other way around.

Ok now, everyone get crazy about Connie’s “clever” move to drag Steven into dancing with her. I want to say, I don’t doom Connie for, quoting from others, “have been dumb”, instead, I appreciate her effort to cheering her friend up, as he always does to her. She knows she can’t totally be part of this world (due to many things, not being a gem, living a kind of life style so different from Homeworld standards, another mind-setting, and also c’mon, she is just a very young girl, you can’t pretend) , but she wants to stay on Steven’s side and support him as much as she can, to make smile again a friend so emotionally and mentally tired and down. She believed few moments of dance, enough to raise up Steven’s moral, would not hurt anyone, and no one intended to fuse, that was accidental. Many other replied that, thinking of it, every time that they danced on screen, they fused, so how did not see that coming?. Yes, every time on screen, but all the other times, off-screen? Like, on other afternoons, and at Garnet’s wedding after the ceremony, we don’t see them on the dance floor but I’m sure they didn’t miss the occasion to dance together and have fun. Not less important to mention, it was supposed to be a call-back, as the title of the episode, at “Alone Together”, as “The question” from the previous arc did with the older episode “The Answer”.

Plus, even Stevonnie is so adorable with Pink Diamond’s outfit. Pure bae.

While watching this gesture with the hands, I like to think is Steven and Connie individually still holding hands from the dancing, just a second before realizing now the hands of one became the hands of the other as well.

Oh, and there we are. Things fucked up in the worst of the scenarios. (there’d be a lot to say in particular about White Pearl’s frown at the sign of Connie and Steven twirling happily together, but all my thoughts I collected in a separated post, giving to that theory its own space, that I’d link here). Yellow whisper with tight teeth “Pink what are you doing?” is a cause of bad news.

And then the Crystal Gems come at the rescue, with Garnet and Opal (!!! before taking her down in 0.2 seconds, why this cartoon network, do you really want, at the end of the series, people coming up with videos like “every time Opal shows up” just to be, if everything went good, two and half minutes long? Is what you really want, CN?)

But the real surprise came with her:

from the end credits of the episode it’s “Jade”, she is actually very adorable: this little missing tooth, these sunshine eyes and the gem-stones placed like two puffy cheeks make her even more sweet (judging by the combination of her dress, I was right saying the yellow and green gem from before during the entrances of the diamonds belong respectively to Yellow’s and Blue’s court). It’s admirable having the courage to do “coming out”, encouraged by the CG’s bravery, standing for what they have fate in and for what is right, even if it means getting against the society’s stricter rules and meet the judge of the rulers themselves, with all the possible consequences. I’m sure she believed Pink/Steven, by her influence dictated by her high rank status, would approve and legalize cross-gem fusions and decided to stay by this diamond side. “I knew I couldn’t be the only one” is sorrowful to hear, so away from Homeworld’s eyes exist other gems of different types that fuse for love, but have to keep it hidden to not meet an horrible fate (shattered or possibly harvested). That’s sad. Let them be.

Also, love Stevonnie and Opal staring at Garnet like “yo man, you’re the fusion expert, what about that?”, and Garnet is just idk stuff dudes.

ok but, it’s not that Ruby and Sapphire lost their wedding rings after being poofed, right? … right…? (#edit after ChangeYourMind watching: thank the Lord it didn’t happen)

Scene: *everyone poofed, delirium, everything went wrong and Stevonnie is grounded* the evil gremlin inside my head: new outfits/new intro?

Last thing, I just want to make a point about Stevonnie’s “prison”:

A dark locked place at the top of a tower. Now, some time ago, Rebecca Sugar took part on a livestream with other cartoon creators, on the occasion, while talking about different stuff, Alex Hirsch (creator of Gravity Falls), asks miss Sugar what would happen if a gem was placed in a dark room for a long amount of time. Rebecca simply replied “I can’t answer that”, surely because if she does, it could be spoiler for the upcoming episodes (this constant keeping it secret is an ongoing situation with her, lol). The fact is, we all know the physical form of a gem is a projection of light that shapes in actual matter, to allow them to interact, act and speak, and it’s from light itself a gem takes her nutriment (and not from food, like organics do).

So deprive a gem of light (whatever kind: the sunlight, the moonlight, the stars’ light, natural light or artificial light), of her only nutriment, is the equivalent of making her “starving”? Adopted as a form of torture for gems considered needing a punishment for a possible wrong action?

A gem in a room surrounded only by darkness, without even the tiniest glimmer of light, what happens when she reaches her limit and lost all the energies left? Would she became a simple, faded, inanimate gemstone as the our ones from Earth?

Bonus: Who noticed that?

Since the answer I always had the anxiety these two rubies get shattered for ineptitude towards the mission to strike down the rebels and protect Sapphire. I’m glad they’re still around then.

#long post #steven universe #su #diamond days #together alone #character analysis #episode analysis #su theories #cartoon network #rebecca sugar #u want to take my soul aren't you?#homeworld

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thedeanthomas · 6 years

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Expectations and Reality || AU

It’s been days. It has to have been. Dean has barely moved from the bed, ordering take away pizzas to sustain himself. He doesn’t think, all he does is sleep and zone out to Office reruns on Netflix, trying to keep himself as numb as possible so he doesn’t break down again. Shay’s Smiths t shirt is in a crumpled pile in the corner of the room, Dean had thrown it there that first morning when he’d woken up. He hits the power button on his phone and gets the dead battery icon. With a sigh, Dean rummages around for his charger, plugging it in. As soon as it gets the juice, his phone blows up with notifications he’d been ignoring. He has 18 missed called and 158 texts. He groans when he opens his texting app and sees that at least half of them have to be from his mum.

Dean hits call and throws the phone on his bed with speaker on. He tries to stay awake as his mum shouts at him for disappearing, then he comforts her dully as she weeps about some nonsense with thinking he was dead.

“You’re not alone, are you? Dean, you can’t be alone right now-“ She rambles on for several minutes, but Dean knows she’s right. His mum knows him well enough to know that that’s what he defaults to when he’s upset.

“…we’ve been praying for you Dean and…”

And at the same time she didn’t know a single thing about him.

“I’m fine mum.”

“Seamus is with you still?”

That hits him like a thousand bricks to his chest. Of course she didn’t know. Why the hell would she know. He’s supposed to be torn up over Lavender, mourning the future of married life, suffering the humiliation of being jilted-it was there, but it was nothing compared to the fog of hurt, anger, confusion that he’d spent the past 72 hours in. He’d lose Lavender a hundred times over if it meant Seamus would come back. But he can’t even begin to conceptualize how he’d explain this to his mother. He didn’t even know where she stood on gay people, not really….not that Dean was gay people. God, was Dean gay people? No. No he wasn’t. He liked women. What happened just happened because he was drunk. But that didn’t make explaining this any easier to his mom.

“Dean?”

“Yeah. Yeah he’s around. Just stepped out for a smo-food. He’s getting food.”

Dean didn’t need a cigarette lecture on top of everything else. For a few seconds, he lets himself believe it-that Shay would be showing up in his apartment with eggrolls and one of those trash magazines he read ‘ironically’, throwing himself on the couch…throwing himself on Dean….no.

“I have to go mum. Okay?”

He’d cut her off in the middle of something, but he didn’t apologize.

“Okay. Many happy returns. Namaste.”

“Yep. Ditto.”

“You call me if you need me?

He did need her. He needed her to be who she was when it was just her and him, when they were poor, when she didn’t speak with the affected uppity accent. When she knew him. When Dean could tell her anything. When she would’ve been here, waiting for him, instead of hours away tending to her perfect replacement family.

She didn’t need Dean anymore. That was the problem.

“Sure mum. Bye.”

His plans already disrupted, Dean lets his phone charge and drags himself into the shower, trying to zone out in the water, but it doesn’t work. His thoughts keep drifting to Seamus, to the large loss of him obviously, but Dean can’t quite get other thoughts out of his head. How Shay had tasted….how he’d looked when Dean had been on his knees in front of him…

Dean grunts pinches the skin on his arm to distract himself from getting hard. God. What the hell was wrong with him? He smacks the side of the shower wall and feels better when his hand starts to smart. Good. Something to feel other than fucking sad and like a fucking girl.

He gets out the shower and paces around in his towel, suddenly needing to get out. It’s eleven in the morning. Luna should be awake. Dean checks his phone. It’s…how the hell was it Thursday? Didn’t they get back on Sunday? Whatever. It didn’t matter.

“Hello?”

“Hey it’s-“

“Oh so now you can fucking call me, hmm? Come on, Thomas! We thought you died.”

Luna’s hint of an Irish accent deepens whenever she’s mad.

“No you didn’t. I live across the hall, numpty. You’ve seen lights on.”

“My point still stands. Don’t fucking do that.”

“Sorry.”

“So what have you been-“

“Want to go out tonight? You can bring Ginny if you want.”

“Er, sure. She’s got practice tonight and she usually just crashes atAngelina’s after because it’s closer, so it’ll just be you me and Shay.”

God. It stings. He wants to cry. He hates himself. He wants to punch something. A thousand more emotions hit him at once and Dean locks them away, and his voice is flat when he speaks.

“Shay isn’t coming.”

“Why?”

“I’ll be round at eight okay?”

“Dean Malcom Thomas. Talk to me.”

“I’m going back to bed, Lune. I’ll see you at eight?”

“I’m mad at you.”

“Bu I’ll see you at eight?”

“….I’ll see you at eight.”

He didn’t lie to her. Satisfied, naked, Dean falls back onto the bed. It’s hours later when his text tone pulls him out of sleep.

Luna: What the hell happened with you two?

Dean starts to type

Dean: We got drunk at the club in Greece, and we were trying to get me laid, or at least someone to make out with. Shay kissed me because we couldn’t find anyone, and then I kissed him. Then we sucked each other off. Then he fucked me. And I liked it. Then he left me. Then I got drunk and called him a whore when he came back and I don’t think he’s ever going to talk to me again-ok?

He hits the backspace button so fast his phone glitches for a second. Then he types again.

Dean: had a massive blow up. I think we’re done. Shay hasn’t talked to me since. And I don’t care.

Luna: Yes you do.

Dean: Sure. Look, I just want to get drunk and find a girl tonight, okay? Can we focus on that?

Luna sends him an excessive amount of the eye roll emojis, and the rest of the afternoon passes in the same haze he’d been living in. Around 7, Dean takes the time to pick out his clothes carefully, settling on a royal blue sport coat, white button up and dark jeans. He expects Luna to berate him for his outfit choice, but when he knocks on her door, it flies open and her arms are around him instantly. Dean would normally resist, pull away even, but he just accepts the affection, gently hugging her back. He’d forgotten how nice human contact could be.

“What was that for?” He asks as he lets her go. Dean tries to smile at her but he knows it looks fake.

“You needed it, mate. After everything that happened.”

“I told you. I don’t care about Shay.”

Luna raises an eyebrow.

“I was talking about Lavender.”

Dean looks away from her.

“Oh. Right. Well I’ve ordered a car it should be here so-“

“Right.”

Luna stands next to him at the bar. They’re about three shots in.

“You look hot by the way.” She says this as she plays with the lapel on his jacket. The compliment surprises Dean and he smiles at her for real this time.

“Really?”

She rolls her eyes.

“Yes, Thomas. If I wasn’t with someone, I’d pity fuck you.”

He laughs, and she does too. He’d asked her for that once, when he was really drunk the first year of Uni and it’d turned into a sort of in joke. Dean takes a long swig of his beer.

“So….you on your own in the apartment?”

Dean won’t ask about him. Not directly. Luna nods.

“Shay hasn’t been round, no. Asked me to tell him when you were going to be out.”

He ignores that and how much that hurts.

“So Gin isn’t moving in?”

“Er….no. She can’t afford it. Neither can I really, on my own. If I can’t find someone I might have to move.”

That surprises Dean. They hardly live anywhere extravagant. Dean preferred it that way, though Lavender had been harping him to move somewhere nicer after the wedding. He didn’t need much, not really, and even though his stepdad always paid for everything, Dean didn’t like to take advantage of that, even when he should. An idea pops into his head before he can stop himself.

“Let me.”

Luna scoffs, not understanding.

“What, drunkie?”

Dean grabs her hand.

“Its er-partially my fault you don’t have a roommate now, and it’s definitely my fault you lost your first one at least. Let me pay your rent. Please. It’ll make me feel better.”

Luna laughs.

“You’re the strangest person I’ve ever met, you know that?”

Dean throws his arms out in front of him.

“What?”

“You’re going to sugar daddy my lesbian relationship because you feel bad?”

“Yeah.”

“And you don’t see what’s weird about that?”

Luna does another one of the shots set in front of them.

“Only you saying the word ‘daddy’.”

Luna chokes on the shot and coughs, glaring at him. Dean pats her back.

“Sorry, mate.”

“You should be.”

He flags the bartender for water before turning towards her again.

“So will you let me or no?”

She raises her eyebrows.

“You serious? This isn’t just drunk Dean talking?”

Dean thrusts his arms forward and dramatically mimics a sobriety test.

“I’m not that drunk. But I am that serious.”

“Dean!”

She presses a kiss to his cheek.

“Normally I wouldn’t let you…but god, I want to live with my girlfriend. Ooh. Sorry.”

Luna’s eyes grow large as she realizes what she’s said. Dean shrugs.

“Don’t be. But I’m serious. Seriously.”

Luna’s face breaks out into a grin.

“I’m gonna go call her and tell her the good news. Also…” She jerks her head slightly to the right. “It’s looking like I’ll see you in the morning. Let me know if you need clean up crew.”

Dean laughs as she walks away. He sips on his beer for maybe 30 seconds before new company joins him.

She’s gorgeous. He hates himself for noticing how similar she looks to Lavender, but this girl’s hair is cropped short and her lips are fuller. She smiles at him and Dean notices her eyes are a lot kinder than Lav’s hand been in years.

“Hi.”

She’s American. That surprises him.

“Hi.”

“Um…was that your girlfriend?”

She’s bold. Drunkenly bold, she glances over at her group of friends and they all giggle. Dean smiles, feeling anticipation build in his stomach.

“No. Not at all. She’s on her way to call her girlfriend.”

“Oh. Great. I’m Rowan.”

“Dean.”

“Hi Dean.” She smiles, getting just a touch closer to him.

“Hi.”

“You can buy me a drink now, if you want.”

Dean laughs.

“Well I think I want to, but it depends on something.”

“Hmm?”

“Are you as fun as you are pretty?”

She blushes but laughs.

“Definitely.”

“Then, definitely.”

Rowan’s lips tickle his neck as Dean fumbles with his keys in the doorway.

“You live alone?”

She says this between kisses, sucking a hickey on his neck.

“….yeah.”

They open the door and Dean barely gets it shut behind him before Rowan’s all over him. She’s practically climbing the front of him, and Dean takes the hint, lifting her up easily. She’s so little, she about the same shape as someone else who had recently wrapped his legs around Dean’s waist. A groan escapes him at the memory, and Rowan smiles against his lips. Dean grabs her jean covered ass as they walk into the bedroom, and when Dean falls back onto the bed, he gropes her breasts through her blouse. As Rowan gets settled on top of him, Dean’s hands run up the back of it and undo her bra, slipping his hands up through the front of her shirt after. She moans into his mouth as his thumbs graze her nipples and Dean bites her bottom lip in return. He massages her breasts as she undoes the buttons on his shirt, and he moves his arms to pull off his jacket and shirt. Rowan pulls her own shirt off, flinging her bra aside, and Dean tries not to show disappointment. He liked undressing women, the moment of anticipation just before you get to see her...it’s like magic. He notices her pale chest is dotted with beauty marks, and it’s endearing. He traces a finger over one of them and she shivers.

Rowan climbs onto his lap and kisses him greedily, gyrating against him as she kisses down his neck again. Dean pushes back up towards her, moaning, but uh....

It’s not working. He’s only half hard. And Dean knows Rowan notices.

“Sorry, ‘m a little drunk.”

He says this against her lips and she smiles.

“I can fix that. Lay back.”

Her telling him what to do does make his hips twitch.

“You don’t have to...”

She pushes him on his back and starts kissing down his neck, down his chest, and she sucks a hickey on his hip before answering.

“I want to, yeah? I bet your dick is huge.”

She’s trying to be sexy, but it just makes feel gross to have her talk to him like that-still, Dean grins at her as she starts to take off his pants and briefs, watching, propped up on his elbows.

“You American girls are different, yeah?”

She licks a stripe on the underside of his cock and smiles at the immediate effect of it.

“Oh, you have no idea, baby.”

Baby.

Dean groans again at the memory of Seamus instead of what Rowan is doing to him now. It’s just dark enough and her hair is short and dark-Dean’s mind slips easily back to Greece, to Shay calling him baby-Shay swallowing all of him .Rowan’s pace is quicker and...wetter, but it works. Dean closes his eyes and loses himself, growing harder and harder until--

“Do you have a condom?”

“Nightstand.”

He stays on his back as she goes to find one, giving his cock a few pumps with her hand before she puts it on him. He feels himself soften at her touch but he thinks of Shay and fixes his problem. God, what the fuck was his problem? This absolutely stunning girl absolutely desperate for him, sucking him off, and Dean has to think about getting fucked by his best friend to stay hard?

Maybe...maybe he liked men.

It’s the first time he lets himself think that, really, soberly and truthfully, and Dean knows its true. He wasn’t not attracted to Rowan, it was just-there was a large part of him, larger than he’d known actually, that wanted to be taken care of. Used. Praised. And he wanted a man-Seamus preferably, but he’d bungled that quite nicely-to do that to him.

If only he hadn’t had this realization with a woman on his lap. Rowan’s trying to fuck herself on his cock, but it’s not going to happen-and they both know it.

“Dean?”

“Can you uh-can you get off of me?”

She does, looking at him strangely.

“You okay?”

Dean breaks eye contact, looking over the side of the bed for his underwear

“I uh--no. Sorry. I think you should go.”

She makes a noise of surprise.

“Seriously?”

Is she annoyed? Dean glances at her. She’s definitely annoyed. In the light from his lamp that he’s turned on, she’s not nearly as pretty as she looked in the bar. Though that might be her personality.

“....yeah.”

“You won’t even like, go down on me or something? I only have two more nights in London.”

That annoys him.

“Am I a tourist attraction?”

She ignores him, putting her clothes back on in a huff.

“Thanks for nothing.”

“Anytime.”

That pisses her off.

“What, are you gay or something?”

“I-”

Dean laughs, even though it’s not funny.

“I think so, actually. Yeah.”

She walks away,not looking back, but Dean doesn’t care. For once, someone was leaving because it was what he wanted. Dean could get used to getting what he wanted. When he hears his front door slam, he grabs his phone,opens his messages with Shay and starts to type.

Dean: I’m sorry. I miss you. I want you

He hits delete.

Dean: I just tried to fuck a girl and all I could think about was you

Delete

Dean: will you come over and fuck me? we don’t even have to look at each other.

Delete

Dean: I just want to kiss you again.

That’s it. That’s whats so brilliantly pathetic about all of this. Dean wants affection, tenderness, softness from Shay. The opposite of everything he deserves. He deletes the message from his phone and closes it. He sighs and falls back onto the pillows after pulling his briefs back on, glad Rowan left him alone with his thoughts. Even if he can’t get what he wants, at least Dean can get some sleep. Despite it all, he smiles slightly to himself. He was right-picking up a girl did make him feel a little better. Just not in the way he had expected.

#drabble #:/#luna #rowan #seamus #au

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skeletonwoman · 7 years

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Purple Lingerie (James Potter)

SO. I am doing a super cool pal favor of filling some requests for for @daphnegreengrass who is super cute and lazy and busy. (this is 1 of 4) (i also don’t have the prompt list link so lol)

Request: 21 and 32 with James Potter please (or sirius black if that's easier for you!) thank you! 21. “You know, it hurt when I realized that you’re not in love with me. But nothing can compare to the pain I felt when I saw you fall in love with her.” 32. “I’m so stupid to make the mistake of falling in love with my best friend.”

This one, while supposed to probably be angsty, I decided to mix up and make super cute because I love twisting and stealing all ur dreams (fem!reader as usual)

James wraps an arm around your waist, and you groan, trying not to smile as he presses a kiss to your bare hip.

“I’ll be late.”

The word is soft but he releases you all the same and you rise, slipping your clothes back on and padding from the dim room.

Lily laughs loudly and you can’t help looking up. Across the room, James holds forks to his head and you frown. Sirius snorts, only to smack his friend upside the head when the fork wielding James barks at him.

Oh.

Their patronus’. Not that it’s any of your business.

You’re not even part of their friendship group. And the fact that you even know what James, Sirius, Remus and Peters patronus’ are is laughable.

Laughable.

His arms encircle you and you can’t help the way your body melts to his.

“I got a ninety-eight on my transfiguration quiz,” he mumbles, trailing kisses over your shoulder and you can’t help scoffing.

“You’re a transfiguration genius, I’d be amazed and surprised if you got less than seventy,” you counter, turning in his arms and sliding your hands over his shoulders. His smile is warm as his gazes travels over your face.

“Want to celebrate?”

“Of course? You got an amazing mark and deserve all the praise that comes with it.” You sigh contentedly as his lips brush over yours, his hand sliding to your ass.

Upside down from his broom, James waves his arms like an idiot. This isn’t the surprising bit, what’s surprising is when Evans does the move back and he laughs. Hard.

In a sick, unreasonably possessive sort of way, you’re glad when the ball hits him in the gut and he has to cling to his broom.

It’s wrong of you to be jealous.

You’re not his girlfriend and you don’t want to be. Neither of you want a relationship.

“I need your opinion.”

“Yes, I like the purple satin better. I know you thought I’d like the red but f*ck, you in the purple?” James groans, his pupils wide with lust as he remembers the last time you’d worn the purple lingerie.

“Okay… That’s fair, but I was going to ask if you were okay with Remus and I going to the Yule Ball together?” You chew your lip and he seems to freeze for a moment before thawing and smiling at you.

“Why wouldn’t I be okay with it? Have you fallen in love with me?” He jokes and you scoff, gently pushing him away.

Good. Going with Remus would be a tight line to walk but it would also remind you of the line in the sand. The sand line that says no falling in love with James Potter.

You hadn’t planned on joining on the shopping trip but at least a third of the year and girls from all the houses were going so you’d allowed yourself to be roped into it.

Technically, you were having fun. Not that you didn’t expect to not have fun but…

“What do you guys think?” Lily beams, turning in a circle and you can’t help but admire her outfit. The gold dress, with its off the shoulder straps and a slight v at the bust drew more than a few jealous compliments and you smiled at the other girl.

“James is going to freak,” someone says and your stomach curdles. How you hadn’t picked it, you don’t know. Who else would he go with? He’d always had a thing for her.

“Oh my gosh, Y/N! Look at you!” Someone else says before the conversation can go further and you blink, shaking off your jealousy and grin at the group.

“I think I found my dress.”

“You ready for tonight?” James murmurs, his lips trailing over your shoulder and you mumble nonsense, arching into the touch. Four AM, when you should be getting beauty sleep, and you’re tangled with James in the announcers tower at the quidditch field.

“Ready to dance with a guy who can actually dance and knows how to behave himself in public?” You ask, laughing softly when James growls.

“Well, lucky my dates so agile if I’m such a terrible dancer then,” he counters, laying warm kisses across your collar bone.

“Hey.” You lean back slightly, your fingers catching his chin to keep him still. “Lily’s going to look amazing, you’re really lucky.”

He looks like an idiot. Mooning at her like that. She’s beautiful, sure, but should he really be mooning?

You smile at Remus, who returns the expression and leads you toward your seats.

“James!” He greets his friend, who blinks and grins at him, barely sparing you a look. James momentarily glances at Lily before turning back to his friend and wiggling his eyebrows.

Okay. Jerk.

“Remus, you ready for a dance off?” James jokes and Remus laughs, but shakes his head.

“Why would I dance with you when Y/N is so much better looking?” He says, leaning toward you and whispering, “want to dance?”

Nodding, you let him lead you onto the floor and into the crush of dancers.

The night draws to a close and you wonder if you’ll see James tonight. You have got the purple lingerie under your dress, though by the look on his face all night he might kiss Lily at the stairs then go to sleep alone.

You try to imagine not kissing him again.

What if your last kiss was your last kiss? Sleepy early morning kissing is supposed to be your last kiss?

A wave of dizziness hits you and you feel yourself sway.

“Y/N?”

You stumble toward the exit, only to find your path blocked by a marble staircase.

You manage to think how pretty they look clean before they’re rising up to meet you.

“I’m on my back.”

“Yeah, baby.” James leers from beside your head and you startle, jerking away from him.

“Why are you in my room- Why am I here?” You grumble, glaring at the infirmary around you. “Why are you here?”

“You just dropped. I was there so I caught you before you hit the stairs but… Jesus, Y/N, don’t scare me like that.” He’s stressed, obviously, and a part of you is glad. It’s petty, but you’ll take what you can get by now. It’s pathetic too.

“I don’t… I was just dizzy and then- Lily! Is it okay that you’re here?”

Madame Pomfrey appears behind James and you startle. Everything about the woman makes you nervous, she’s pretty without being obvious, smart without gloating. She’s subtle and it’s creepy. “What are you doing awake? You need rest, my girl! Mr Potter, what are you still doing here, the ball is still going?”

“I… I wanted to stay. With Y/N,” he says, the words slightly shaky and he catches your hand, squeezing it between both of his.

“Oh.” Madame Pomfrey squeaks, her eyes lighting up before her lips turn down. “I am sorry to do this then, but the girl needs her rest.”

Leaning over, a wand fills your vision before tapping you between the eyes and your head is suddenly full of cotton.

“She’ll conk out in a few minutes- and don’t hold anything she says against her, she’s going to be loopy. She likely won't remember anything past a few hours ago too, so now's the time to confess any secrets.” With her orders complete, and a wink dispensed, she slips from the space and flings the curtains closed around the bed.

“Is Lily ok?”

“Lily’s-”

“I don’t want to hear about Lily!” You thunder, filled with righteous jealousy. “She’s a turd! You know, it hurt when I realized that you’re not in love with me. But nothing can compare to the pain I felt when I saw you fall in love with her. I want to kick her off a stoop. With my foot. Because I am angry and hurt. Because I’m so stupid to make the mistake of falling in love with my best friend.” You waggle your finger in his face and his thumb rubs across your cheek. You frown deeply when you see a tear on his thumb. “Where’d that come from?”

“Y/N, I…” His words trail off as darkness encroaches on your vision and you watch his lips shape words you can’t hear before you drift into sleep.

James stares at you all breakfast, only interrupted by Sirius smacking him in the face with the letter that had landed before him. He doesn’t open it, doesn’t look at it, just slides it into his robes and continues staring.

Nothing's changed since yesterday, as far as you know. There's a blank spot from the Yule Ball to this morning but you were with Remus and Remus would've looked after you.

So the staring's a surprise.

And you’d be uncomfortable if it was anyone but James. The hours you’ve spent naked with nothing for him to look at but you have made it impossible to be nervous or twitchy or uncomfortable.

So, maybe you’re still twitchy. Whatever.

When he pushes to his feet, you duck down and hope he passes you by.

“Y/N.” His voice is solemn and deep and when he sits down beside you, you meet his gaze confidently.

“What’s up, Potter?”

“I love you,” he says calmly, drawing a gasp from the girls around you. “I’ve been in love with you for months and I thought I’d tell you.”

“Oh my god,” someone wheezes across the table and you frown at him, taking in the news.

“That’s fair.” You shrug and pick up a piece of bacon from your plate, nibbling it. His smile is as bright as the sun when you look back, a giant grin only creased when he takes some of your bacon and eats it.

“Good.” He smiles, leaning forward and pressing a kiss to your cheek. “I’ve got practice but I’ll see you at lunch, right?”

“Sure, sure,” you mutter, feigning casualness and he grins, obviously giddy. The sight brings a flush to your cheeks and when he hesitates to leave, you catch his chin between your fingers and press a slow kiss to his lips. The feeling’s old, but hell if it isn’t just as sweet as always. “You should get going.”

i don’t write HP and haven’t before these fics so my apologies if they SUCK

also, i love the marauders

#james potter fic #james potter imagine #james potter x reader #james potter fanfic #james potter fanfiction #marauders fic #marauders fanfiction #marauders imagine #marauders x reader #harry potter fanfiction #HP

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surgoiaru · 7 years

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@thelovelyaleclightwood said anybody could do this and a certain question made me jump right on board! (they are such a sweet person btw I /highly/ recommend their blog <3) (also fel free to tag me in anything and everything like this beb! I’m always so happy to do these :D)

Rules: Answer all questions, add one question of your own and tag as many people as there are questions (I can’t tag that many people but I will tag a few mutuals at the end if that’s ok with them ;; <3)

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1. Coke or Pepsi: Pepsi Max is my drug i swear to god *is unhealthy af*

2. Disney or DreamWorks: Disney <3

3. Coffee or Tea: idk I like raspberry moccacinos but I also like lemon scented tea ;; If I had to pick one though it'd be tea

4. Books or Movies: B O O K S #1 priority in my life

5. Windows or Mac: Windows

6. DC or Marvel: DC

7. Xbox or Playstation: Playstation

8. Dragon Age or Mass Effect: idk I've never played ether nor am I in either fandom??

9. Night Owl or Early Rise: Night Owl af

10. Cards or Chess: I like both but if you shove a chessboard in my face I will play for hours, even if by myself

11. Chocolate or Vanilla: Chocolate

12. Vans or Converse: Converse (never had vans so can’t compare)

13. Lavellan, Trevelyan, Cadash or Adaar: idk what/who these are??? someone explain to me pls

14. Fluff or Angst: oh god I need fluff to brighten my day but angst is just so /good/ in a bad way, I'd have to pick Fluff though

15. Beach or Forest: Forest <3

16. Dogs or Cats: Either as long as it's super fluffy af

17. Clear Skies or Rain: I like me some rain on a clear day

18. Cooking or Eating Out: I love my fucking cooking it's so great *can only cook pasta and butter chicken curry* but I prefer eating out

19. Spicy Food or Mild Food: The only spicy thing I like is Spicy Butter Chicken Curry, anything else is mild

20. Halloween/Samhain or Solstice/Yule/Christmas: uh is this not obvious??? official spoops for a day??? FREE CANDY???????? dressing up for the spoops??? the classic sheet over your heard with cut out holes to be a ghost???? Horror movie night??? Halloween is my life

21. Would you rather forever be a little too cold or a little too warm: This is really hard because I can't handle too much of either, if anything I'd pick to forever be a little too cold because then I'd have an excuse to snuggle up to my s/o whenever

22. If you could have a superpower, what would it be? I want the superpower to materialize and control any power seen in fictional universes that are described in detail via writing or visually detailed via show and/or movie so I can picture it well in my head, but I’m limited to summoning one a day (it’d be draining) and I’d have to access the same power a few times via visualizing it in my head before I can summon it at whim from memory, after every use I’d get a horrible craving for butter chicken curry and therefore most of my expenses would go towards ingredients for making home made curry and I’d just fill my fridge and freezer with containers of it.

23. Animation or Live Action: Animation pls

24. Paragon or Renegade: idk what either of these are??

25. Baths or Showers: Showers, sure they make my life harder but I'm very uncomfortable with baths

26. Team Cap or Team Iron Man: Team Iron Man ofc

27. Fantasy or Sci-fi: Fantasy child here, gimme them hot fictional villain babes

28. Do you have three or four favorite quotes? *inwardly groaning* I have so many favourite quotes but I can't remember a single one off the top of my head but they're all so good and they're all from my otps I guess one I like is "I will haveyou without armour, Kaz, or I will not have you at all" - Inej to Kaz, Six of Crows or Crooked Kingdom?? (my mind’s gone blank on which book it was in)

29. YouTube or Netflix: Youtube i'm broke

30. Harry Potter or Percy Jackson: Wizarding world or mythology world I'm internally screaming I love both so much, Percy Jackson tho 'cause demigods <3 but magic... ;;

31. When You Feel Accomplished? I don't. Once I had, and it was because I actually finished a story I started writing.

32. Star Wars or Star Trek: I'm not like /super duper obsessed/ into either but I kinda like Star Trek???

33. Paperback Books or Hardback Books: I WOULD KILL TO HAVE HARDBACKS OF A FEW BOOKS I WANT BUT ME BEING BROKE HAS TO SETTLE FOR PAPERBACK

34. Handwriting or Typing: It depends what i'm writing tbh, if it's something creative I have to handwrite it first to get my imagination flowing, anything else is just straight up typed

35. Velvet or Satin: Velvet is so nice to touch

36. Video Games or Movies: I like video games a lot tbh but I won’t pass up a good movie

37. Would you rather be the dragon or own the dragon? I HAVE THOUGHT ABOUT THIS SO MUCH, THIS IS THE QUESTION THAT MADE ME WANT TO DO THIS WHOLE THING. I want to be a dragon, a dragon who masters illusion/shapeshifting, to my fellow dragon friends I would appear as a dragon (unless they see it as a threat then I would be humane), but to the humanoid race I would be seen as a mere mortal, watcher of the dragon lands, and if ANYBODY tries to touch my precious scaley babes or steal their eggs then I'll unleash my draconic fury on them.

38. Sunrise or sunset: Sunrise, I see it every morning from the lounge window *should upload pics of it tbh*

39. What’s your favorite song? right now it's a toss up between Volt by Yung Lean and Touch Fluffy Tail by Ken Ashcorp

40. Horror Movies yes or no: Y E S, I say that but I really can't handle the next few days after watching one because i'm so jumpy and paranoid of everything and everyone and I lose sleep over it but in the moment YES PLS

41. Long hair or short hair: I have short curls right now (natural ofc) and I love them to bits, I wouldn't wish for anything else (trying to love myself is difficult ok)

42. Opera or Theatre: I'd have to go with Theatre

43: Assuming the multiverse theory is true and every story ever told has really happened somewhere, which one of the movie/book/tv show/game/etc worlds would you pick to travel to first? FUKKING DUMP MY ASS IN THE GRISHAVERSE PLEASE I BEG I NEED TO BE THERE EVEN IF I'M A MERE MORTAL OR A GRISHA I JUST NEED TO BE THERE

44: Are you scared of thunderstorms? Yes and no, I'm petrified of them when i'm alone (which is most of the time tbh) but I'm chill if someone else is there with me and we're wrapped up in blankets under a blanket/pillow fort sipping hot chocolates and talking about anything and everything to distract myself from the storm outside ;;;

45. Would you rather travel back in time or into the future?: You can't change the past and I'm not really dying to know what shaped this world to what it is today, so I'd have to go with the future (the only thing I'd go back in the past for is to see where the fuck Matthew went so I know here to go to punch him in the face C: )

46. What is, in your opinion, the most pointless/unnecessary thing ever invented? Me. I kid I kid, idk really, I guess the most unnecessary thing ever is money currency, why can’t we just like pay with smiles or jokes or compliments or just something nice to get nice stuff?

47. Favorite band/artist? Favourite Band currently: 10 Years Fav Artist currently: Yung Lean or Ken Ashcorp

48. If you could meet a Famous person that’s either Dead or Alive who would it be? Lewis Spears

49: How old were you when you had your first kiss? ... *hasn't had first kiss* *is 17* end my life

50: Favorite TV Show: Hannibal, Shadowhunters, Gravity Falls, Steven Universe, uhhh I can't think of any off the top of my head but HEY PLS RECOMMEND ME SOME GOOD SHOWS IF YOU KNOW ANY ;;;;

51: What is your dream outfit? Grisha kefta(all of them) OR a black long sleeved shirt, black jeans, black cloak, black combat boots, black muffler scarf, black fingerless gloves a long steel staff engraved with angelic runes or two small ones that can connect.

52. Who would you like to be for a day? I don't really like anyone to the extent where I would want to BE them, I'd prefer to be with them than anything else, so I guess for a day I'd prefer to be me (i'm trying so hard with the self love :<)

New question! 53: (it's not really a question but whatevs) Pick two of your favourite characters from different fantasy universes and shove them into a modern au where they're rivals from first meeting but slowly become rivals with friends, what would it be like? (They'd still have their powers if they had any, and accustomed to certain terms or slang from their universe)

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Now for the tags! You don’t have to do it if you don’t want to I just like to remind my mutuals that I still think and care about them <3 (also if you do do it and I get tagged i’mma stalk and answer that extra question you put in the chat thingy just because <3)

@witchery-goddess @raphsantiagay @cats-sarcasm-and-fandoms @i-am-the-jack-of-all-trades @claup777 @sunnysugarsock @vuhniller

I also tag anyone else who wants to do this!

#personal #question post thing #idk #I LOVE DOING THESE PLEASE TAG ME IN MORE????

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empresspilaf-blog · 7 years

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these are actually hella fucking cute y’all

I’m answering all of these because as previously stated I have a real thing for filling stuff out. I like being asked questions it’s fun, keeps my brain workin’ :D

1: when you have cereal, do you have more milk than cereal or more cereal than milk? More milk. And I never drink it at the end. I can’t, I’ll get sick. I can’t drink milk, and if I have cereal too often I’ll get sick. But it’s just not right if there isn’t lots of milk D’: 2: do you like the feeling of cold air on your cheeks on a wintery day? NOOOOOOOOOOO DDDDD: 3: what random objects do you use to bookmark your books? Anything? I think there’s a Mythology book around here somewhere with a peanut M&M’s wrapper in it.

4: how do you take your coffee/tea? I don’t put anything in tea, and I’ll drink black coffee, but sometimes I put creamer in it. If it’s available. I like peppermint mocha best yum :D

5: are you self-conscious of your smile? Nope! I think it’s pretty nice, actually. It’s one ofthe few things I actually like about myself lol. I hate my body and my acne but I think my nose, eyes, and smile are decent. I had braces so my teeth are straight. I didn’t wear my top retainer though so there’s a small gap, but it doesn’t bother me. Except when I eat apples. The skin always gets stuck >:( My teeth could be whiter, and they’re small and square looking, but I think my smile is alright.

6: do you keep plants? No, but I want to. I just can’t keep up with that stuff. And my room faces a very shaded yard so sunlight really doesn’t come in.

7: do you name your plants? I totally would! 8: what artistic medium do you use to express your feelings? I prefer to draw with pencil/colored pencil, charcoal, and I’m trying to use inking pens. I suck at painting lol. I did just get a tablet, though, and Autodesk Sketchbook. So that’s been fun to play with. 9: do you like singing/humming to yourself? Oh yeah. I would love to be able to sing really well. So far I can do a decent Marilyn Monroe impression lol. My favorite thing to sing along to is No Doubt. I love Gwen’s voice. It’s a good exercise too, all the vibrato and crazy patterns she does. I also like to sing Heart, too. My boyfriend says I sound pretty good, but I still won’t let anyone else hear me lol. Even though he’s a musician and probably knows what he’s talking about, I still don’t think it’s that great haha 10: do you sleep on your back, side, or stomach? Yes.

11: what’s an inner joke you have with your friends? Hmm I can’t think of any that don’t require a long explanation lol. Well okay, how about this. I didn’t ever really drink until I turned 21 (almost exactly a year ago, January 17!), and then when we’d hag out with friends and I’d get drunk, I’d start going up to people whispering “Hey. I’ve never been drunk before” in their ear lol. Like ever time it happened (which wasn’t all that much, I’m still not a huge drinker). It got to the point that now if I drink, everyone goes “Watch out for Robyn, she’s getting drunk for the first time!”

12: what’s your favorite planet? Uranus ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Hehe uhm Jupiter, because it’s full of gas, like me? I’ve honestly never really thought about this. I think Neptune is the prettiest, and I like the idea that humans may be able to live on Mars. ~Sailor Pluto is my favorite Sailor Scout. :D

14: if you were to live with your best friend in an old flat in a big city, what would it look like? A mess hahahahahahahahahaaha. She has three cats and I have a dog. We both have depression, anxiety, BPD, OCD, and ADHD. (fun fact, our diagnoses are identical. We both have PTSD as well). But we love doing crafts and not cleaning our rooms, so I imagine there would be glitter, scrap fabric, pencil shavings, and wadded up paper everywhere. Among the pet hair, of course! 15: go google a weird space fact and tell us what it is! 99% of the solar system’s mass is the sun! (shit!) 16: what’s your favorite pasta dish? S P A G H E T T I

17: what color do you really want to dye your hair? Uhm well I’ve literally had every color lol. But right now, I’m having a lot of trouble getting red to stick to the lengths, it keeps fading to brown immediately. My hair is very damaged so it’s not too cooperative at this point :/

18: tell us about something dumb/funny you did that has since gone down in history between you and your friends and is always brought up. Uhm ok so I have IBS pretty bad, right? My friends and I went to Denny’s one night. We came back to one friend’s house, and I needed to fart (Sorry, this is gonna be gross lol). So as my friend Nick was coming up the stairs, I stuck my butt out and farted on his chest area. Only I didn’t fart. I pooped on him. HAHA and now everyone laughs at me because I shit on the bass player! The best part was I ran to the bathroom and I had my boyfriend get my spare undies from the car (gotta have those when you got that Irritable Bowel), and when I went back downstairs, Nick had no idea what had happened lololololol 19: do you keep a journal? what do you write/draw/ in it? Nopeee 20: what’s your favorite eye color? I mean as far as what I find attractive, brown. Big brown eyes. On guys and girls. But especially guys. Girls with light eyes can still be cute but I think dark eyed men are just the best <3 That’s not to say there aren’t also some attractive men with light eyes (points to Bradley Cooper, Chris Hemsworth, Conrad Veidt, J o n a t h a n J o e s t a r). 21: talk about your favorite bag, the one that’s been to hell and back with you and that you love to pieces. My smiley backpack! I just started really using it about a year ago, but I got it when I was like 3. so it’s around 19 years old. I actually just ripped one of the straps out partially last night, and I gotta sew it (thanks for the reminder!). It’s about a foot in diameter, and it’s just a giant yellow circle with a simple black smile and eyes and two straps. 22: are you a morning person? If by morning person you mean I stay up all night and am awake still when morning comes. Though I was up from Thursday evening to last night with no sleep, so I slept all last night and have been up since 6:30 this morning. 23: what’s your favorite thing to do on lazy days where you have 0 obligations? Well since I’m pathetic and I don’t have a job and the Kent State University won’t let me have Financial Aid (due to dropping my classes last semester because of HEALTH ISSUES, wtf), every day is like that. I hate it, actually. I do nothing but sleep. I stare at my computer for hours, scroll tumblr and Facebook, get out drawing supplies and then stare at the paper and cry, lay in bed and cry, cry and cry ;u; 24: is there someone out there you would trust with every single one of your secrets? My boyfriend, Mr. Alexander Tortorella. He’s been one of my best friends since 2010, and my boyfriend for a little over 2 years. Also my two closest friends, Taylor, who I’ve been best buds with for over ten years (we even got tattoos together) and my friend Ryanne who I mentioned before (the one with all the problems like me lol). 25: what’s the weirdest place you’ve ever broken into? No where, I’ve never broken into anyplace. Other than my car once because I locked the keys in it lol. 26: what are the shoes you’ve had for forever and wear with every single outfit? I actually have these flat slip on clogs that have like a brown sweater fabric that I got in 2006. I wear them pretty much all fall/winter if I’m just running to the store or to someone’s house. If there’s no snow, of course lol. I also have Converse I got in 2007 that have the British flag on them, and The Who’s logo on the tongue. there’s smiley faces drawn on the rubber at the toe, and along the side banding one one of them are lyrics to “What a Catch Donnie” by Fall Out Boy.

27: what’s your favorite bubblegum flavor? I love regular bubblegum’s taste but it doesn’t last long enough to bother. 28: sunrise or sunset? Sunset 29: what’s something really cute that one of your friends does and is totally endearing? Uhh…? My friends aren’t really “cute” people hahahahaha. I mean Taylor has called me “Bobert” for years and that’s funny lol 30: think of it: have you ever been truly scared? Yeah this one time when I was little I floated too far on a raft in Lake Erie and thought I was gonna end up in dying lol. I mean compared to other things that have happened in my life that really isn’t anything too bad, but the fear I felt at the time was so immense. 31: what is your opinion of socks? do you like wearing weird socks? do you sleep with socks? do you confine yourself to white sock hell? really, just talk about socks. I love socks! Cool socks. I’ve got Marvel hero socks, whale socks, Star Wars socks, Sailor Moon socks, Winnie the Pooh sicks, sailboat socks, and funky pattern socks. I hate sleeping in socks though. I also have a collection of black dress socks from marching band haha 32: tell us a story of something that happened to you after 3AM when you were with friends. I got naked and chased a friend down the street when I was 17. That was my one experience being drunk before I was 21 lol 33: what’s your fave pastry? Friggin Oreo Poptarts. They count. 34: tell us about the stuffed animal you kept as a kid. what is it called? what does it look like? do you still keep it? Little Pooh! And Big Pooh! I have a like 2 and a half foot sitting Pooh Bear and a small one. I dragged them both everywhere when I was little. I still slept with the small one until I was like 16. But it’s so worn and falling apart, I needed to switch to a larger version to cuddle lol. Now I just kinda cuddle whatever teddy bear or stuffed animal I grab haha 35: do you like stationary and pretty pens and so on? do you use them often? Yes, but I don’t really have them. I do have some super cool Norman Rockwell notecards. And I have rainbow pens I use to color coordinate notes. I’’l freaking rip a page out and re-write everything if i mess up. 36: which band’s sound would fit your mood right now? Well I’m currently listening to “Fly” by Sugar Ray and I’d say that’s doin’ it pretty well :D 37: do you like keeping your room messy or clean? Yeah so have you seen a tornado’s aftermath? 38: tell us about your pet peeves! People who chew their nails (Glares at Alex, even though he’s not here). Girls who talk all hood, and act dumb for attention, then get offended when you don’t take them seriously. 39: what color do you wear the most? Black lol 40: think of a piece of jewelry you own: what’s it’s story? does it have any meaning to you? I wear a ring everyday, I only take it off to shower. Alex has one too. They’re silver bands, and they have the coordinates to our high school engraved in them (that’s where we met). One has the latitude, one the longitude. Inside mine it says “Alex”, his says “Robyn”. 41: what’s the last book you remember really, really loving? White Oleander by Janet Fitch. 42: do you have a favorite coffee shop? describe it! I just like Starbucks. I’m a white girl. Sue me. 43: who was the last person you gazed at the stars with? Alex 44: when was the last time you remember feeling completely serene and at peace with everything? əʇndɯoɔ ʇou səop 45: do you trust your instincts a lot? Oh, no. I overthink everything 46: tell us the worst pun you can think of. I can’t just do this on the spot!!! The other day a friend asked if I was going into the medical field, because I was really nursing my beer lol 47: what food do you think should be banned from the universe? BEANS. All beans. Fuck beans. 48: what was your biggest fear as a kid? is it the same today? Yep, spiders. 49: do you like buying CDs and records? what was the last one you bought? The last CD I bought I think was Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge by My Chemical Romance. I’ve had every word of it memorized for like 10 years, but I never actually owned a hard copy. The last record I bought was probably Houses of the Holy by Led Zeppelin. *note; as I was moving on to the next question, the song “Houses of the Holy” came on my iTunes o.O (though let it be noted as well that the song “Houses of the Holy” is actually on the album “Physical Graffiti). 50: what’s an odd thing you collect? Souls. And old empty bottles. Like empty pop bottles. Not so much anymore, but I have a ton of them in my room that I use as decoration 51: think of a person. what song do you associate with them? Pretty much anything from Def Leppard’s Pyromania or Van Halen’s 1984 reminds me of my dad because those are his favorite albums (and 2 of mine) 52: what are your favorite memes of the year so far? I mean the salt guy is funny? I’ve really been slacking in the dank meme area lately. I am truly ashamed. 53: have you ever watched the rocky horror picture show? heathers? beetlejuice? pulp fiction? what do you think of them? I have only seen Beetlejuice of those (I knowwww), and I like it, but the heavy late 80′s asthetic creeps me out a bit. Not the stuff that’s supposed to be creepy, but all the black and white checkerboard and stripes, bright colors, and things like that lol 54: who’s the last person you saw with a true look of sadness on their face? My dog, because I wouldn’t let her have her bone back (it was bed time!) 55: what’s the most dramatic thing you’ve ever done to prove a point? We don’t need to discuss that. Once again; I have BPD. That should tell you plenty. 56: what are some things you find endearing in people? Not being an asshole. That’s about it. 57: go listen to bohemian rhapsody. how did it make you feel? did you dramatically reenact the lyrics? I mean I do sometimes, other times I just listen and enjoy it. My friend Nick did a project for school (he’s a music production major) where he mixed the original tracks differently, and he made the bass and snare more prevalent and now the original sounds empty to me hahaha 58: who’s the wine mom and who’s the vodka aunt in your group of friends? why? Lol what??? I mean I drink wine more than anything, but I probably drink more vodka than anyone else too lol. Most of them just smoke that reefer to be honest. Alex and I don’t, he doesn’t drink either. And I rarely drink vodka. But no one else ever does lol 59: what’s your favorite myth? The brown sound lol. The idea that there is a decibel so low that if you hear it, you’ll poop yourself! They proved it to be false on Mythbusters, though. 60: do you like poetry? what are some of your faves? I used to write poetry a lot. I actually was published in a national anthology of selected student poets in 9th grade. I have trouble being creative anymore, though. I like Thoreau and Walt Whitman. We studied them in 11th grade. 61: what’s the stupidest gift you’ve ever given? the stupidest one you’ve ever received? I’ve never really given a gag gift. Though one time I wrapped a robe I got my sister in a series of boxes and duct tape just to mess with her :D I wouldn’t say I’ve ever received anything “stupid”. 62: do you drink juice in the morning? which kind? Nope. I like apple juice, though. Orange juice makes me sick. Acid reflux issues. 63: are you fussy about your books and music? do you keep them meticulously organized or kinda leave them be? OOOOHHHHHH Gotta be in alphabetical order. Though currently my books are strewn across my floor, mixed in with clothes, my Sailor Moon VHS collection, shoes, makeup, blah blah blah 64: what color is the sky where you are right now? Really light grey. Ohio is bland and gross. 65: is there anyone you haven’t seen in a long time who you’d love to hang out with? My friend Taylor. she doesn’t live very close so I don’t ever see her anymore :’( 66: what would your ideal flower crown look like? I have a few I made over the summer. My favorite is just a bunch of daisies. I love daisies <3 67: how do gloomy days where the sky is dark and the world is misty make you feel? Lol indifferent. That’s what today looks like, and pretty much everyday around here. 68: what’s winter like where you live? Well when I was younger, it was snowy and bright and fun. Now it barely snows, and it’s always gloomy and muddy and gross. My basement flooded a couple days ago because it rained so hard. 69: what are your favorite board games? MONOPOLYYYY. I got a Dogopoly for Christmas hehe. I like Sorry and Clue a lot too. 70: have you ever used a ouija board? Nope

71: what’s your favorite kind of tea? Green tea, and the youthberry/ wild orangeblosson tea from Teavanna 72: are you a person who needs to note everything down or else you’ll forget it? yeah pretty much. And I still always tell myself I won’t forget shit, and then I do. 73: what are some of your worst habits? Smoking cigarettes, sleeping too much, drinking pop instead of water, picking my nose lol. I’m twitchy and fidgety but that’s just the OCD and ADHD. 74: describe a good friend of yours without using their name or gendered pronouns. Uhhhhhhhhh “Big fat faggot”. (that’s actually how he would describe himself, he likes going up to people and saying “I’m REALLY gay”) 75: tell us about your pets! I have my darling baby Mae Mae, she’s around 9(??) she’a a black mutt that looks like a bear/wolf lol. I got her from the Humane Society. Then there’s Bellatrix, who my mom got from the HS. She’s a brindle boxer, almost 4 years old. We have a 7 month old kitten named Hosta. My mom found her in the hosta bushes outside this summer, so we named her after the flowers lol. We also have a guinea pig, of my sister’s, named Alfie. He’s about 2? 76: is there anything you should be doing right now but aren’t? I could use a shower. 77: pink or yellow lemonade? Pink <3

78: are you in the minion hateclub or fanclub? I thought they were cute in Despicable Me, but it’s gotten way out of hand. 79: what’s one of the cutest things someone has ever done for you? Alex once bought me ice cream and flowers and made a sign that said “sorry for being a douche”. I don’t even remember what he did wrong, it was cute :3 80: what color are your bedroom walls? did you choose that color? if so, why? Well a few months before we moved in, I painted them purple. Then I decided that was boring like a couple weeks before we moved, and I got tihs cool 70s-looking (or even 30s really) floral wallpaper with like gold and pewter flowers and I put it on two walls. I painted the one wall orange, the tiny bit around the closet sage green, and the area around the door with chalkboard paint. Then I got mad one day about a year later and went and bought light green and covered the orange. I still don’t really know why lol. 81: describe one of your friend’s eyes using the most abstract imagery you can think of. Dude what? I don’t stare at anyone’s eyes? 82: are/were you good in school? HAHAHAHHA. I got suspended for mooning someone. That’s all you need to know. 83: what’s some of your favorite album art? Queen’s News of the World has a sweet cover. Def Leppard’s High N’ Dry, Smashing Pumpkins’ Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness, Aphex Twin’s “Windowlicker” single, of course. Green Day’s Dookie, Dio’s Holy Diver. There are aa TON but you know. I’m getting sick of typing lol 84: are you planning on getting tattoos? which ones? I’m planning on getting a lot lol. Currently a Ginger Rogers close-up on my forearm. I have a Pooh sketch on my side, “You’re braver than you believe” (Pooh quote) written in my friend’s handwriting on my right shoulder, and “There’s still time to change the road you’re on” on my right foot (”Stairways to Heaven” lyrics). 85: do you read comics? what are your faves? Yes, Marvel, Infinity Gauntlet is my favorite. (not including manga because I’m ready to be done with this lol) 86: do you like concept albums? which ones? Yeah, they’re cool! Currently I’ve been listening to To Pimp a Butterfly a lot, actually. 87: what are some movies you think everyone should watch at least once in their lives? Star Wars (original 3), Back to the Future, A Clockwork Orange, Metropolis 88: are there any artistic movements you particularly enjoy? A R T D E C O, art nouveau 89: are you close to your parents? My mother. I don’t talk to my father much. He was abusive to me, he’s an alcoholic. 90: talk about your one of you favorite cities. I don’t really have any? I don’t live cities very much. 91: where do you plan on traveling this year? I’m going to North Carolina for a wedding, that’s about all I can think of. Probably going camping. 92: are you a person who drowns their pasta in cheese or a person who barely sprinkles a pinch? CHEESE ME BABY 93: what’s the hairstyle you wear the most? Well I’m mostly just at home doing nothing so it’s just kinda down and pushed back out of my face. But when I go somewhere it’s usually something pinup-y or 2 buns on top of my head. 94: who was the last person you know to have a birthday? Taylor’s was December 29. But mine is Tuesday! :DDD 95: what are your plans for this weekend? Alex has a show tonight, so there’s that. 96: do you install your computer updates really quickly or do you procrastinate on them a lot? ”Remind me tomorrow” 97: myer briggs type, zodiac sign, and hogwarts house? Don’t know, I’ve never taken one of those tests. I’ve started to, but I can’t really answer the questions right. My answer can go either way, my mood is always changing. I don’t believe it’s easy to pin down a BPD patient’s type. I’m a Capricorn, and I’m not really into Harry Potter. My IQ is pretty high though, lol. I’m proud of that. It’s the one thing I have haha. 98: when’s the last time you went hiking? did you enjoy it? I don’t remember, but I know I whined the entire time because I’m out of shape lol 99: list some songs that resonate to your soul whenever you hear them. Uhhhh. My brain isn’t functioning at a very deep emotional level right now lol I can’t think of any? I guess “Blown Away” by Carrie Underwood, it reminds me of my father. 100: if you were presented with two buttons, one that allows you to go 5 years into the past, the other 5 years into the future, which one would you press? why? Neither. I don’t want to change the way things are now. Sure, I’d love to tell myself “Don’t gain twice your body weight” and “don’t drop our of high school or college” but like, Butterfly Effect. I know somehow that would make it so I never reconnect with Alex, or I end up dating someone I wasn’t happy with, or what if somehow I got in a car wreck and died as a result of something stupid? And I don’t want to see the future. What happens happens and I don’t want to live in anticipation.

Feel free to talk to me about any of this stuff! I welcome friends, I’m lonely haha

#i did it #it's been two hours #TWO #HOURS #long ass post #oops #me #personal #someone please read this #lol #I doubt anyone will #but the sound of my keys is nice #long #read me #my life is boring

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