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k-evans-reads · 1 year

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In Living Color

Chapter 19

Summary: When Natalie Marton, lead character designer for Buzz Lightyear, meets the voice of Buzz, Chris Evans, the sparks are undeniable. But when their work pushes them away from each other, both physically and emotionally, will the sheer differences between their worlds be enough to force them apart?

Pairing: Chris Evans x Pixar Animator OFC Natalie Marton

Word Count: 3,932

By: @k-evans-writes and @ourfinest-hour

We do NOT give permission for our works to be reuploaded, translated, or reposted on any other site. Our work is our own.

Warnings: SMUT. 18+ ONLY. MINORS DNI.

Previous | Main Masterlist | In Living Color Masterlist

March 18th, 2022

Unfamiliar terrain filled Nat’s eyesight as she stared out the window of the car, taking the sights of Atlanta. It had been a long flight out here after yet another grueling work week but this one seemed a lot more bearable than the last few, knowing that the light at the end of this week was seeing in person that shining smile of the man she loved.

Nat ran a hand through her wild curls before stretching out her legs that were still a little cramped from the long plane ride before she looked over at the man in the driver's seat and smiled, “Thanks so much for picking me up, Josh.”

“Happy to do it,” he honestly told her, glancing over at her for a moment before he chuckled, “Besides, having you here means I won’t have Chris moping around all weekend so honestly you being here is a service to me.”

Although Nattie hated to hear of anything dampening Chris’ mood, she was happy to know that he had been as downtrodden about their separation as she had been. Nat had struggled a lot more than she realized but tried to push it all from her head, muttering. “I’m just happy I’m finally getting out of my office and remembering there’s an outside world.”

“Are you still working like crazy? I know Chris has been kind of worried about how much you’re working,” Josh spoke with a raised eyebrow.

Hearing it almost made Nat want to roll her eyes, knowing that this wasn’t the first time Chris had voiced his unhappiness about her workload but she just justified it with, “It’s just a busy season. But I’m so glad I was able to get today off so I could come out here. I’ve never actually gotten to see Chris filming.”

“Don’t get your hopes too high, it’s not that entertaining,” Josh retorted, making Nat burst into laughter as they kept driving along the highway.

Although she loved the way that Chris’ lifelong best friend teased him, she knew that his words wouldn’t be quite true for her. In their nearly year of dating, she had gotten to see him record his lines for his Lightyear voicework and see the fruition of his hard work in his films, but never had she gotten to observe him while acting.

When they arrived at the set, she only got to steal a quick kiss from him before the director talked to the crew as Josh and Nat moved over to the side, blending into the background and staying out of the way before they got ready to run the scene. Nat quietly stood as her eyes fixed on Chris, just silently watching him as she watched him shed himself and took on a brand new persona. She had gotten to see him transform during Lightyear as he acted in the booth but this was different. Nat remembered him talking about how challenging voice acting had been, not able to work off of anyone else and for the first time she truly got to see him shine in his working element, seeing the easy way that he carried himself as he worked.

Being apart had been so hard, the two hardly able to see each other since filming had started on Valentine’s Day. She had gotten to spend the long President’s Day weekend with him in Boston and had been able to see him shortly when he’d come to Los Angeles for a weekend for a bachelor party but it was a far cry from how used to being together they were, falling into the groove of living life together.

But now they were finally back together, even if it was only for a weekend, but once his arms were wrapped around her Nat felt like everything was right with the world. They just soaked in getting to hold one another for a long moment until finally pulling apart enough to press their lips together as passionately as they could with so many people surrounding them as the cast and crew were all headed in different directions.

“I’m so happy you’re here,” Chris’ voice was soft as he looked down into her eyes.

“Me too,” she could feel her smile shining from ear to ear before Chris’ arm snaked around her shoulders as they walked through the busy set. “I’m glad I got here in time to watch you film.”

“I don’t know if I am because then you’ll see what a shit actor I really am," he laughed while squeezing her a little tighter.

“I knew that already,” Nat teased him, earning a slap to his chest as he roared with his hysterical laughter and she was reminded just how much she missed that.

The two chatted non-stop as they went to the costume trailer where Nat waited outside as Chris got out of his costume and makeup and emerged in his illegally tight white tee shirt and sweats. Almost immediately she was tucked back under his arm as they walked together toward a trailer down at the end of the line where Chris held open the door and let Nat walk in before following her inside.

After the door of the trailer was shut behind them, the pair were finally alone for the first time in much too long. The separation between them had been a lot harder on each of them than they’d even realized but especially for Nat. She wasn’t used to being separated for so long and it was something she thought would be a little easier than it had been. Every time she faced another night alone or weekend without hearing that familiar loud laughter, she felt her heart dropping a little.

Nat had thrown herself into her work even more, focusing on her artwork and although it helped get her mind off of missing Chris, it had caused her to be more burned out than she had imagined. But now she finally was here with him. She could finally breathe in his scent and feel his hand rubbing up and down her arm as he stepped closer and lowly said, “I missed you so fucking much, Nattie.”

The look in those blue eyes of his gazing at her from under those long eyelashes had her getting weak at the knees. She couldn’t resist being able to finally wrap her arms around him, feeling the firm muscles of his back underneath his soft white tee shirt as his arms came around her waist and caged her in. In an instant his mouth was on hers, kissing Nat completely senseless as she started feeling dizzy, needing nothing more in this moment than him.

She loved him so fully, so completely that she couldn’t wait a second longer to pull away, breathless as she whispered, “I love you, Chris.” The moment was so intense, both of them so desperate for one another and their chest heaving as they tried to catch their breath, but that one statement from her seemed to stop everything. Nat was still pressed up against him as he lifted his head, his tender eyes looking down at her as he reminded her, “I love you too, Nat. So much.”

And as if Nat wasn’t already feeling lightheaded enough, those words sent waves of emotions straight to her heart while Chris’ lips attached to her neck as she melted into him. Their lips kept finding one another’s, kissing over and over again while each of their hands grasped at any bit of each other that they could as they stumbled toward the tiny bedroom in the trailer, clothes being peeled off and discarded as they went.

Chris couldn’t have moved faster if he tried, and before Nat knew it he had her laying back on the bed and was buried deep inside her. Her left hand came up to grab his cheek as her right hand moved down to cup his firm ass, and Nat found herself emotional at being able to finally see that gorgeous face of his in person instead of across a phone screen. They were finally back together and nothing felt better.

They just held each other’s eye contact for a long moment before Nat saw Chris’ eyes flutter closed as he leaned down to kiss her deeply and she felt herself clench around him from the deep love she felt, making Chris have to pull away from her lips to groan from the feeling. Nat felt so good, overwhelmed by the feeling of having him buried deep inside her while her hand reached up to run through his brown hair while he littered kisses across her chest. They were so in love and so happy in this moment and their arms came around each other to cling tightly together while Chris’ hips started moving in and out at a slow loving pace.

“Oh god, Chris. Fuck, you feel so good,” she whimpered as her body curled up into his, her left hand trailing down his back to rest on his firm ass, giving it a good squeeze right as he thrust into her.

“Love you so fuckin’ much Nat,” Chris grunted, pressing a sweet kiss to her neck before his hips continued to slowly rock in and out. “I missed you. I missed feeling you.”

Nat felt herself melting underneath him, unable to even respond to him with just how incredible he was stretching her out. Both Chris and Nat were just soaking in this glorious moment, wrapped up in the comfort of having each other in their arms once again. The only sounds in the trailer were their pants, their normal running dialogue and praises were silenced, both just too overwhelmed by the love and emotions they both were feeling. Eventually when Chris heard Nat’s sweet whimpers, he picked up his pace, burying his face in her neck to nuzzle a few kisses, his firm sweaty chest pressed against hers, allowing Nat to feel his quick heartbeat.

“Chris please, baby I need to feel you,” Nat urged him breathlessly, her hands grasping at those broad shoulders.

Nat was too wrapped up in keeping her own breathing at bay that she didn’t realize that Chris was barely hanging on already but hearing her words nearly drove him over the edge. She whimpered when he lifted his chest up a bit, leaving space between them before he dropped his hand down between them, changing to slower little thrusts as he let his thumb find her sensitive clit, rubbing quick tight circles while he encouraged her, “C’mon baby, let go. I wanna see that gorgeous face you make. I wanna feel you squeeze me, Nattie.”

The white hot heat was pulsing through her and Nat couldn’t help it, letting her body release as her smooth walls gripped Chris so tight a long obscene moan poured from his lips. He held onto her hips tightly, keeping himself fully seated inside her as his essence filled her. Nat felt like she was going to pass out when her eyelids fluttered open and she looked up, seeing Chris’ eyes shut tight, his mouth hanging open as he panted and a few dark hairs hanging over his sweaty forehead as he tried to regain his breathing.

Needing to feel him close, Nat reached up to grab the gold St. Christopher’s medallion around his neck and gave it a gentle tug, silently telling him what she wanted. Feeling weak as he still recovered, he practically collapsed on top of her small frame, careful to keep his weight on the mattress so he didn’t hurt her. Nat wrapped a leg around his firm behind, her arms holding onto him tightly while he nuzzled his face back to the crook of her neck, his beard prickling her skin that his lips soothed with gentle kisses.

It had been too long, much too long, since they had gotten to have moments like this and neither were ready to let go just yet. As much as they wanted to just stay together in the glow of that moment, they eventually pulled themselves from the bed and took a quick shower, both changing into their comfortable clothes before walking hand in hand to where Chris’ car was parked.

They happily caught up as they drove home, Chris filling her in on all the little things that had happened the past few days when they hadn’t had much time to talk. As much as Nat loved to listen to his animated stories, she loved being able to see him in person, getting to run her hand along his back once they had gotten to his temporary place during filming, laughing as she kept dropping things while they cooked dinner and hearing that loud laugh. Just getting to physically be together made all the different for Nat, feeling more happy and centered than she had in a long time.

As they ate dinner, a comfortable silence fell upon them before settling into their routine of cleaning up, Nat washing dishes while Chris dried but even that felt good. Nat was exhausted, the past couple of months at work draining her but none of that seemed to matter now. Not while she was with him, reminding her of all the things in life that really mattered.

Just as Nat had shut off the running water and handed Chris the last plate to wipe dry, she caught the look in his eye, seeing a softness there before he leaned in for a soft kiss, his hand that wasn’t holding the dishrag rubbing along her arm as he revealed, “I’m so glad you’re here, Nattie.”

“I think you mentioned that before," she just couldn’t help but tease him, bumping her hip against his before drying off her hands.

“Well I’m going to mention it again because I mean it,” Chris called over his shoulder as he put the plate away in the cabinet, then turning to toss the rag onto the counter so his hands could be free to grasp at her hips and pull her into him, “I’m just really happy you were able to come this weekend. I’m sorry I only have the weekend off.”

Nat just shrugged as her arms wrapped around his neck loosely, her fingers toying with the ends of his fluffy brown hair while acknowledging, “I doubt I would have been able to stay any longer than the weekend anyway. I have to be at the daily on Monday morning, so it actually works out well.”

“Sounds like you’re still really busy at work,” Chris’ eyebrow rose.

Her arms fell from around his neck before trudging over toward the couch, scratching Dodger on the way by before curling up onto the cushions as she countered, “You’re gone anyway so I might as well work a lot.”

“You already were working a lot before.”

“There’s just a lot going on right now,” she tried to remind him as he made his own way to the couch, coming to sit near her, angling his body toward her as his thick arm came to rest across the top of the couch cushions.

“When won’t there be though, Nattie? It seems like you’re always swamped with work these days.”

Nat knew that part of what he was saying was true. Lately there weren’t many days that weren’t crazy busy but the other part of her knew that he didn’t understand. Chris never had a conventional job. He didn’t understand the type of job where so many things depend on others, deadlines, and going through the grind of putting in hours everyday, then sending off the latest pieces for approval before making the countless adjustments as requested. It wasn’t that his job wasn’t challenging or didn’t take work, but she knew that his view of time off was extremely different from hers. If he needed a break, he had the ability to take one, but if she needed a break and didn’t work, it would mean getting fired and only having enough savings to last a short time.

She knew that her job had been a point of contention lately, both of them struggling with the separation they were both facing and the heavy workload causing a lot of extra stress for her but she just didn’t want to start the weekend out this way. Nat got such limited time with him now that she didn’t want to get into something that would cause an argument and ended up reaching over to rest a hand on his thigh, conveying, “Chris, I’m really not trying to be dismissive but I don’t want to talk about work. I just want to focus on us being together.”

It looked as if the wheels in his brain were churning as he sat there for a moment. It was obvious there was more he wanted to say, more behind what he was feeling but ultimately deciding to drop it and agreed, “You’re right, let’s forget about work.” He took her hand from his sweatpant covered thigh and pressed a kiss in her palm before saying, “Although the one work thing I am happy about is the Lightyear premiere because then I know I’ll get you for almost an entire week while I’m in LA.”

“I always get emotional at premieres because of getting to see the culmination of years of animation that we’ve worked on but this one is going to be even more emotional,” Nat already knew that this one film held so many more emotions than normal not only because of so much more work that she’d poured into it, but because of the relationship it’d brought to her life. “I already know I’ll be crying like a baby.”

“Why? I thought I didn’t even make your top three favorite voice actors?” Chris couldn’t help but tease with that sideways smile on his face.

“Well I’ve kind of grown partial to you.”

“You better have,” he chuckled softly as he playfully shoved her shoulder gently before his tone shifted and she saw his eyes sparkling in the dim lights as Chris asked, “Is your family still planning on coming to the premiere?”

Nat bubbled with laughter, knowing that was a rhetorical question. Her family had been buzzing about this for so long and she rested her own elbow on the back of the couch, her hand coming to prop up her cheek as she informed him, “Oh yeah, they’re so excited. The last one they came to was Inside Out so Ella doesn’t even remember it, and then Lily and Carson weren’t even born. Zach and Alex weren’t even married yet so this will be Zach’s first premiere too.”

“And the first one where you’ve been the lead character design too, right?”

“Yeah so you’re going to have to give me red carpet lessons,” Nat smiled, having a hard time in this moment understanding that as he sat there in his worn tee shirt and black sweatpants while he laughed and teased her, that he was the same guy as the man who stood on red carpets posing for the hundreds of photographers calling his name.

“I’m not the person to ask, I’m on and off that shit as fast as humanly possible,” he tipped his head back with a laugh before turning it lazily to look at her with a hand reaching over to rest on her knee, “But you’re right, this is going to be a special one. My family is already pumped about coming.”

“I’m so glad I’ll get to see your family again. I loved getting to spend more time with them when I came out to Boston last month,” she mused while her thoughts drifted back to the President’s Day weekend when she had been able to take that Friday off, giving her almost four full days visiting him in Boston and spending time with his family that she hadn’t gotten to see enough of, including finally getting to meet his father and the rest of his family members for a few quick hours.

Being in Boston for only the second time had allowed her to see that other side of Chris. That completely unguarded and calm self, being completely comfortable and at ease. It wasn’t that he wasn’t ever like that when they were alone, or when he had come to Washington to be with her and her family, but seeing him in his beloved and true home let her see such a beautiful side of him that they both had needed to endure these long stretches apart.

With a point of his finger and a loud cackle, Chris told her, “Carly still wants to get even on Monopoly so we’ll have to break that out while they’re here.”

“Are they going to stay with you when they come?” Nat wondered, slipping her hand into his and just enjoying getting to have those soft touches as they talked.

“Well, I was actually thinking about renting them an AirBnB or getting a few hotel rooms for them all to stay at so I could invite your family to stay at my place,” he shrugged, eyes glancing over to where Dodger had wandered in with a toy in his mouth.

“Chris, that’s so sweet but you don’t need to do that. I don’t want that to take away from you having time with your family,” Nat was quick to speak up, not wanting him to feel like he needed to prioritize her family over his but when his blue eyes came back to meet hers, she knew it was anything but that.

He just shook his head before leaning in to steal a quick kiss, settling back into the cushions as her legs came to drape over his lap. Chris’ hand wandered up and down her thigh covered in the black leggings she was wearing as he insisted, “I want to, Nattie. I get plenty of time with my family and still will that week, but I want your family to be able to spread out and have a comfortable place to stay, especially with having the younger kids and baby Jack.”

“You’re so thoughtful it’s almost sickening,” Nat laughed as he blushed softly from her teasing praise. “You’re seriously going to be the kids’ favorite person because they still talk about your pool to this day.”

He held up his hands in defense, stating, “Hey as long as I’m winning them over, that’s all that matters.”

“You’ve won them over a long time ago,” Nat knew how true that was. There wasn’t hardly one FaceTime that she had with those three kids that she loved so much without them asking or saying something about Chris. They’d all fallen in love with him over the Thanksgiving week that he’d spent with them but Nat knew that all of it paled in comparison to how much she loved him. How much she truly, deeply, purely loved him. “Besides, they all know I’m not planning on letting you go anytime soon.”

“Well I’m happy to hear that because that means we’re on the same page.”

And Nat knew that they truly were. Neither one had to guess how the other felt, wondering if their love was returned just as deeply or if the other was just as committed. Despite the strain of work and struggling to see eye to eye in certain moments about it, they knew that at the base of everything was nothing but love for each other and nothing felt better than that.

A/N: We'll be back next week with a new chapter! We wanted to let you guys know (in case you hadn't seen it already!) that we are taking the week of 4/27 off from posting due to our schedules then. We both are very busy then and wouldn't be around to handle the postings!

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honeyjars-sims · 5 months

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2.7 Opening Up

Lexie: It’s too bad we got assigned to set design for the first production, but at least we’ll be able to hang out together.

Johnny: Yeah, it looks like most of the acting roles went to the juniors and seniors. Maybe next year we’ll have better luck.

Lexie: Well, the semester’s just getting started. Who knows what will happen. We could impress them with our sick acting skills and get the leads next time.

Johnny: [laughing] I support your delusional optimism! Oh, I almost forgot…my mom wanted me to tell you hi and that she enjoyed meeting you.

Lexie: Hmm, that’s nice of her. I guess let her know I said hi as well.

Johnny: [teasingly] You’re not going to say it was nice to meet her too?

Lexie: No comment.

Johnny: I don’t blame you! Honestly, it went better than I was expecting.

Lexie: Really? That's kind of sad.

Johnny: Yeah, unfortunately, that was just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to my mom.

Lexie: Well, it really bothered me how she was speaking about you. I kept trying to change the subject, but she’d always end up making some snarky little comment.

Johnny: I’m used to it, I guess. The thing is, if I’d called her out she’d say I was overreacting. In the past, I would’ve believed her, but now…not so much.

Lexie: Good, because she’s wrong about you. I can’t imagine how it affected you to hear that as a child, or even now.

Johnny: [sighs] I wish I could say that was the worst thing I had to deal with as a kid, but it wasn’t by a long shot. If you don’t mind, I think I’m ready to talk to you about it.

Lexie: Of course. You can tell me anything. Let's go somewhere more private.

TW: The dialogue below includes discussion of child abuse and drug abuse (not graphic but please use your own discretion if this topic is triggering to you).

Johnny: It wasn’t just my mom who treated me badly. It was also her husband, Jimmy. I refuse to call him my stepdad because he wasn’t any kind of parent to me. He was way worse, though. With my mom it’s this kind of passive aggressive backhanded shit, but Jimmy? He was full-on aggressive. Not just with his words, either.

Lexie: Oh my God, he hurt you? Johnny, I’m so sorry. I didn’t know it was that bad.

Johnny: Yeah, it was pretty awful. I started having nightmares and I was anxious all the time. I tried to talk to my mom about it, but I was too scared to tell her what was really going on so she thought I was just being dramatic.

Lexie: Geez, I can’t imagine my parents just brushing me off like that. You must have been terrified.

Johnny: I was. It only got worse when my mom started doing drugs. By that time I was old enough to start fighting back and all the blame fell on me. Jimmy almost convinced mom to send me to military school but then my dads got custody of me and Chantal.

Lexie: Thank God for your dads!

Johnny: For real, I’m so grateful for them. It’s weird, though…whenever a kid gets away from their abusive family, everyone expects them to be happy about it. No one ever talks about all the mixed emotions. I knew I was better off with my dads, but I still thought about the good times I had with my mom. It was hard to leave her.

Lexie: I think I understand more why you’re still trying to work things out with her. It sounds like the whole situation was really traumatic for you.

Johnny: Yeah, even when I wasn’t talking to her I always had this feeling of “what if?” Like maybe there is a way to fix everything and make it go away.

Lexie: Some things can’t be fixed, no matter how hard you try. I don’t know if your relationship with your mom is one of them, but I hope you’ll recognize when it’s time to let go if it comes to that.

Johnny: I think I will. I’m going to give it more time, but I’m starting to feel like…like I deserve better. I didn’t feel that way before.

Lexie: You deserve so much better, Johnny. You’re so much more than what your mom sees you as. And Jimmy. He better hope I never see him ‘cause I’ll kick him right in the balls!

Johnny: [laughing] Lexie! I’ve never heard you so angry before. I can’t see you doing something like that, you’re too sweet.

Lexie: I’d do it to him! And I’d enjoy watching him suffer. Oh, sorry, I probably shouldn’t be so violent about it. It just really got me worked up.

Johnny: It’s ok. You’re cute when you’re protective.

Lexie: Well, consider me your bodyguard, then.

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velvette3 · 2 months

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(3/29/24)

Why do I feel sad for no reason sometimes? It’s like a sick fuckin joke I swear. Today was such a great and productive day too! My boyfriend is as loving as ever, and he even bought me something! My OC got drawn by someone else so wonderfully and I couldn’t even do her justice w/ her of design! That art is just amazing and beautiful, and it makes me happy!

But yet I feel so sad, like I’m missing something. Maybe it’s just the lingering of my great grandma passing a few months back, but I don’t think so.

My birthday is coming up, I’m excited. I really am, I know for sure at least one thing that is on its way! First time in a few years that I’m excited for my birthday, honestly.

But I just feel sad. Idk, kinda worthless? I love helping people but damnit just seeing those around me struggling, and me not knowing how to help. It’s killing me I think. I’m just glad these are staying in drafts (unless I decide in a half asleep haze to actually post this fuck shit)

I just wanna help people so bad but I’m not able to yet. It’s killing me. I want to help people, I do and helping people makes me so, so happy! It’s what kept me going for a long time. But for that majority of this year, I haven’t been able to help people, and time has gone by too quick. Way too quick. It’s killing me, knowing how fast time is going and how little time I have left in a relaxing life. How little time I may have with people I love. My grandmother on my father’s side isn’t even 20 years younger than the great grandma I lost this year. I’m so scared to lose my Grandma J. I don’t know what I’ll do, and it’s going to be hard once she’s gone, especially when I visit my father.

It’s even worse when there is so much I can’t say to her, and how often I hear her say horrifying things.

I can’t tell her I’m Ace Pan-romantic because she’s Christian, and she talks about death and heaven so casually. I don’t know what’s gonna happen and I’m so, so scared.

So much is just there, and I’m losing so much time. I can’t help people like I want to because I don’t have the time, I can’t spend time with those I love because of how much shit I have to do with my schooling and freaking out about my future (even though it’s already here almost).

Another year I’ve wasted almost, and it’s just moving too quick.

The few things I’m grateful for in this though, are a few people, and my own stubbornness. My boyfriend, god I love him so much. I haven’t said it to him yet, no with the language we speak (English) and I don’t know why. Maybe I’m scared. But I do love him so much. My older brother, E. He’s been there since day one and is so supportive of me. May he be happy in his relationship as it is for him! I love those two shithead so much, and I can’t wait to see my brother again soon, and my boyfriend Just tomorrow maybe!

And my own stubbornness. It’s been almost (at midnight it will be) 191 days since I intentionally self harmed

^ that was the math for months. I am halfway to my head long goal of no self harm, and that has kept me going as well. My stubborn self, whenever I think of self harming, practically on the verge of just doing it, I say I can’t. I’ll be crying and weeping, wishing for pain, but I still can’t bring myself to do it because I promised myself I’d go a year AT LEAST. It’s kept me from giving in, thank god.

But I don’t know, with all of this, even with those few people, if I can do it. I came so close, so so close to giving into the thoughts and shit recently. I’m starting to scare myself. I don’t know what I’m doing, and it’s killing me. Ever since my third grade years, I was horrible when it came to control. That’s when my self harm started, in third fucking grade because I thought I could’ve preventing certain things from happening, had I tried harder. Ever since then I’ve been so hard on myself but FUCK I need to, I deserve it because I’ve let people down so many times, I’ve disappointed so many people so much.

But I dunno. I dunno why I’m so sad when today was so good for me (3/29/24)

I dunno anymore, I just want to help people so bad, I want time to slow down. I want to feel whole. Helping people helps me, and my mentality, so much. But I don’t have the time to help others anymore and it’s so hard to find people to help when everyone has such outta wack time zones.

(3/30/24)

Time is passing too quick and it’s terrifying. On top of that, I’m so scared that if I mess up in my schooling (online schooling anyways) that my parents will call me outta the blue and yell and shit. I remember very vividly back in middle school how I got like, 2-4 states mixed up on my US states quiz that I cried. I cried so hard, fearing that my mother would be angry over a topic I should know well since this is the very country we live in. Thankfully, she wasn’t.

As of now, the grades I’m getting are decent. All A’s, all year round. But I’m struggling in my Spanish. Sure, they may have been more positive about my grades here recently because of the fact that I’m towards the top of my class, but that’s not the point.

Then being happy about it sometimes makes it worse. I fear if I slip even the slightest, their expectations, if I fail them, they’ll be angry again.

I’m so scared to impress them, that I’m making it harder for me because I do so well. I know I do decently, but because of the fact that I rarely mess up, the times that I do, are impactful.

It’s awful, really. I should be happy about my success but it’s just giving me hella anxiety.

I guess this is just a journal now? Meh, it might as well be. Drafts stay drafts, after all.

(Yeah I think this is draft #16?)

#vel rants/info dumps #depressing shit #personal stuff #I’m sorry guys #but it’s not like y’all are gonna see this #this is staying in the damned drafts #Vel’s drafts #sorry for the long post #sorry for the rant

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lovefoolholland · 2 years

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Mastermind (Steve Harrington x Reader)

Summary: When it comes to your relationship, you planned it all along. But Steve didn’t know this, or did he?

Warnings: Absolutely none, teeth-rotting fluff.

A/N: So, uhm, I guess happy Halloween and Midnights release? I really wanted to write something with a Midnights track, and this came in a really natural, organic way. Enjoy <3

~ Masterlist ~

Once upon a time, the planets and the fates And all the stars aligned You and I ended up in the same room At the same time

And the touch of a hand lit the fuse Of a chain reaction of countermoves To assess the equation of you Checkmate, I couldn't lose

The first time you met was at a Halloween Party.

It was a year after Nancy Wheeler had dumped him, and he was super anxious about the memories while Robin dragged him down to that one party filled with high schoolers.

But then, there was… You.

You were freaking bored. Everything seemed dull, because suddenly every single high schooler seemed to be in the urge to make everything cooler than it was before just because Starcourt couldn’t make it to Halloween. And there you were, on a tight blue dress, with your hair done in a bob as Elvira Hancock from Scarface.

Honestly, Steve couldn’t believe his eyes when Robin went to say hello to you.

Is this girl really friends with Robin? She looks too cool for her. No, she looks too cool for this place.

Unless that’s what he thought until you laughed out loud after Robin said an stupid joke. You were just as fun and childish as your best friend, and ironically, Steve’s best friend too.

“So, uh, who’s this?” Steve tried to seem smooth, but only flushed when you raised an eyebrow in his direction.

“Oh, she’s Y/N, we’ve been friends since like, forever” you nodded and extended a hand to Steve.

He accepted it with a smile.

“I’m Steve, Steve Ha…”

“Yeah, I know who you are Harrington” you said as he simply kept his mouth open in a surprised motion “, we shared Econ.”

“We did?”

“Yes” you said, giving his hand a small squeeze before putting it back to your body “, but we never talked.”

“She has a kind of frigid bitch face” Robin mentioned while you hit her in the arm with a smirk.

“No I do not!”

You, in fact, did.

“We really shared a class?”

“Oh, yes, I even remember you failing it” Steve let out a laugh, looking directly into your eyes as you smiled “, want a drink?”

Of course, he didn’t know that you were planning on touching his hand again, because you felt it too. The electricity, the tension, the realness between the two of you.

That night you met him you knew you wanted him.

What if I told you none of it was accidental? And the first night that you saw me, nothing was gonna stop me I laid the groundwork and then, just like clockwork The dominoes cascaded in a line

What if I told you I'm a mastermind? And now you're mine It was all by design 'Cause I'm a mastermind

The next time you met, he was at Family Video.

A bunch of kids were around the counter. There was a redhead, a curly-haired one, and one with Hawkins’ High basketball shirt on. It was a weird mix if asked.

“Hey!” you said as you entered, Steve’s face lifting up from the computer and immediately lighting up.

“Oh, hi” you smiled at him as you made your way to the right of the kids, while they also followed you up with their eyes “Robin’s not here.”

You knew that.

“Oh… Is she on her lunch break? Or is she…?”

“No, this is actually her day off.”

“Shit” you falsely cursed under your breath as Steve moved in front of you with a big, dopey smile “, well, sorry for bothering you, and… Whoever you are.”

The curly haired one jumped at his mention.

“I’m Dustin, Steve’s best friend. More like a brother. Nice to meet you.”

“Oh, hi” you accepted his eager hand as his wide and cute smile appeared “, I’m Y/N.”

“We know” the redhead said, giving you a nod “, I’m Max.”

“Hi Max, and you are?” you asked the basketball player, who smiled before speaking up.

“Lucas. I’ve seen you around school, you’re always with Robin.”

“That’s right” you said, now giving Steve a quick glance. As you predicted, he was looking at the four of you in silence “, we met when we were like six or seven. And we’ve been inseparable since.”

“That’s cool” Max signalled with a silent nod, again.

“So cool, and how do you know Steve?” Dustin asked.

He seemed way more smart than the other two.

“We met at a party” you said, now glad the kid had brought up the topic. You turned to Steve, pointing at him with your finger “, a party where you promised me I could borrow your copy of Back To The Future, young man.”

“Right!” he said, now jumping in his place at the mention. He swore you wouldn’t even remember him, but here you were, reclaiming a copy of a movie he may or may not have stolen from Family Video “I have to check if I have it, I don’t know if I…”

“You know what? Call me when you find it” you responded, taking a pen that was laid on the desk out of nowhere. You took his hand carefully before writing down on his arm your number on big, black symbols, strong enough to not erase “, I gotta go, but thanks. And it was nice to meet you guys.”

“Bye!”

“See ya.”

Steve stood there, speechless, as Dustin let out a laugh.

“How did you bag that?”

“What?”

Of course, Steve was a little in shock to see what you had done. But Dustin had just figured how much of a mastermind you were.

No one wanted to play with me as a little kid So I've been scheming like a criminal ever since To make them love me and make it seem effortless Is this the first time I feel the need to confess? And I swear, I'm only cryptic and Machiavellian 'cause I care

After a couple of dates, and a couple of movie nights, it was finally time for you to tell Robin what you had been scheming all over that night at the Halloween party. Why you had arrived at your house and immediately asked her through the phone about her coworker, his love life and the possible outcomes of flirting with dashing Steve Harrington.

Until, one night at her house while everyone (the kids and the three of you, Robin, Steve and Y/N), was watching The Breakfast Club, she brought up a very sentimental memory.

“Do you remember when I met you?” she suddenly said.

You furrowed your eyebrows, googling over Steve as he turned his head to Robin to hear her better.

“Yes, why?”

“Well, it’s just the movie. It kind of made me remember when we were these two little kids no one in kindergarten wanted to play with.”

A crimson colored blush painted your cheeks when she said it.

“Yeah, of course I remember it.”

“I mean, I swear to God it seemed like the fates, and the galaxies and every single star aligned for us that day, you know? You came close and we just got off to talking and now… We’re best friends.”

You had other friends. You liked to think it was just the fact that connecting was really hard for you, but you had other friends.

No, you didn’t.

“Yeah” you muttered under your breath, and quickly got up from your seat. You didn’t even look at Steve when you did it “, I’m going to the bathroom.”

Quickly after storming off, Steve followed you.

So I told you none of it was accidental And the first night that you saw me, nothing was gonna stop me I laid the groundwork and then saw a wide smirk On your face, you knew the entire time

You knew that I'm a mastermind And now you're mine Yeah, all you did was smile 'Cause I'm a mastermind

It was true, you didn’t have friends.

You were good at socialising, but no one wanted to play with you as a little kid. Why? You never knew. You always tried but there was something about your broken reflection in the mirror that just seemed to be confessing everything all at once, and your mind couldn’t handle it.

As you seated down, you couldn’t help but think of all the times you had planned a relationship like this before. A guy you liked, a ‘casual’ encounter, and a stable relationship before the guy got bored of you and dumped you for someone better, someone sincere.

But the thing was, Robin knew about all of these Cupid’s arrows you had thrown before. She didn’t know about Steve tho, and she had mentioned something so personal and precious of you today, that Steve now was something as personal and precious as your old memories of being a lonely and messy kid.

A sudden knock in your door made you jump.

“Who is it?”

“Me” you knew Steve’s voice even if it was muffled by the thin door of Robin’s bathroom “, can I come in?”

You sniffed before answering.

“Yeah.”

The door opened with a creak and closed with the same sound. Your eyes darted up to Steve’s chocolate colored eyes that watched you with all of his focus.

“You okay?”

“Not really.”

He sat down beside you, on the floor. You laughed before getting to the floor in front of him.

“Is there something you may want to tell me?” he asked, and you sighed “Just if you wanna let something out, I mean.”

You nodded.

“Yeah, I kinda do” you answered, now taking his hand with yours. He intertwined them, the electricity still pretty much alive “, what if I told you I liked you from the first time I met you?”

That made him smile.

“I’ll tell you the same.”

“No, actually like, from the first second. I saw you and I went, woah… I really should’ve talked more to this Harrington kid in Econ.”

“Mm… Yeah, that was kind of my reaction too.”

You squeezed his hand. He ran his other hand through his hair, making it seem flawlessly gorgeous.

“I thought I wanted you” you finally let out, and he raised his eyebrows with a smirk “, and that night… Absolutely nothing was gonna stop me. Nothing.”

His expression didn’t change. In fact, as you finished the sentence, his face contracted more and more into… Into a laugh?

No way he’s laughing.

“Of course! And then you met me at Family Video.”

Your mouth opened in surprise.

“I… Yeah, I did.”

“You pretended to be there for Robin, but I knew you were there for me” he said, nodding in recognition “, I have to admit it, it was a big way to win me over.”

“But, but you weren’t suspicious.”

“Of course I wasn’t. I wanted to go out with you, but didn’t know how to ask you, so thank God you gave me your number first.”

You slowly close your eyes, then open them again. Steve was still there, as happy as ever.

“Really? You knew I planned it all along?”

A wide smirk. A roll of eyes.

“Or course, I mean, you’re pretty straightforward” he said, and gave you a wink before speaking again “, besides, if you’re as close to Robin as she is to you, you would’ve known her schedules. So, yeah, I guess I knew you were a mastermind.”

You couldn’t help but laugh now, too embarrassed to say anything else.

“And I wanted you too” he said, now taking you by the elbow to come closer to him than before “, isn’t that what you planned anyway?”

“What?”

“For me to fall in love.”

You took a breath. You nodded. He let out a breathy laugh, the scent hitting your lips on a silent plea. You knew you wanted him, he knew he wanted you.

So suddenly, your lips came clashing in a perfect, life saving kiss. You smiled and closed your eyes into it, covering his shoulders with your arms as he deepened the kiss in a more passionate, personal, but overall intimate way.

This wasn’t like one of your kisses from before. And maybe, not planning your entire relationship with Steve was way better than planning them. Maybe falling in love was something that happened without a plan, and you kinda liked it.

Or maybe, that was just Steve.

#steve harrington #steve harrington thoughts #steve harrington x you #steve harrington angst #steve harrington fluff #steve harrington x reader #steve harrington x y/n #stranger things fanfiction #stranger things #stranger things x reader

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gucciwins · 2 years

Note

am i the only one who doesn’t want a happy ending

actually i want more angst where he goes begging on his knees to her and she’s stone cold and then like three years later she’s thriving and he’s still missing her….

heartbreak can lead to healing

A/N: hola amores! honestly was not planning a second part on the angst piece because it doesn't even have a name but you all requested a part two so here it is. be kind and let me know what you think.

part one

“I’m not doing this, Harry.”

“What do you mean?” He frowns. He can’t lose you.

“This relationship,” you point gesture to him and yourself. “It’s clear we both want different things.”

“I want you.”

You feel the butterflies swarm your belly at the confession, but he would not talk you into staying with him. You were breaking up with him and moving on because you deserved better. The beginning of your relationship was bliss. He was the perfect boyfriend who showered you with affection and small gifts, always spending time with you and your friends. He had become an exclusive member at girl nights because he was really good at adding designs to all your nails, something you all struggled with. He fit perfectly, but you didn’t fit in his life.

It was clear he was two different people, the person he was with you and the person he was with his friends. You didn’t know which one was the real one, and you were not going to stick around to find out. You hold firm, not letting your walls fall because you know he’d find a way to bring them all down with one stumble. Stella and Aisha promised you it was the right thing to do for yourself. They would never stand to let you be with someone that had you questioning what they were doing every minute they were apart from you. You had cried and drank your feelings away, and you knew as soon as you left Harry’s arrived at your apartment, they'd be there with ice cream and wine, a perfect combination to heal a heartache.

“No, Harry. You don’t.”

Harry frowns, “how can you say that?”

You shrug.

“You know I love you. I love you so much.”

“Not enough to leave the people in your life who hold a bad influence in your life.”

Harry groans, “it’s not that easy.”

You shrug, “it really is, H.”

“I’ve known them for over half my life.”

“And me only close to two years.” You remind him.

“Stop, it’s different. Always has been with you.”

You know it was different. Harry approached you at the bookstore wanting a book recommendation after seeing the large stack in your hands. You laughed and plucked the book from the top wishing him the best of luck. After that, he showed up every day at the bookstore, wanting to see you. It was after a week that he finally saw you again. He talked about the book and how much he loved it, and when he left that day, he went home with three new books you chose for him and plans for a first date.

The relationship blossomed from there, but you took it slow. You dated for three months before you even let Harry ask you to be his girlfriend. Then at six months, he met your friends, soon followed by your families. His friends were the last ones meeting them officially at one year. It’s clear he spoke about you because everyone knew your name, but everyone was surprised to see a plain jane, as they liked to call you. Harry told them to knock it off, but they all laughed it off. You were never at ease with his friends, which should have been a warning from the start, but you were blinded by your love for Harry.

“I love you, Harry.”

“Then stay,” he pleads, getting down to his knees and wrapping his arms around your waist.

“I need to feel respected and safe in our relationship, but all I feel is anguish and insecurity.” You need him to understand. “You know that’s not me.”

“I’ll change, I will, baby, please.” Harry’s close to tears, but you need to rip the band-aid off.

“It’s over, Harry. We’re breaking up.”

You let it sit in the air for a minute. A weight has been lifted off your shoulders. Harry’s tears fall free against your shirt, you should feel guilty, but you don’t. It’s time you put yourself first.

“Goodbye, Harry. Take care of yourself.”

You remove his arms from your waist and leave him on his knees as he repeats his request for you to stay. Leaving his apartment for the final time, you shed a few tears because you love Harry. Some part of you always will, but your relationship wasn’t equal. You were a low priority in his life when it came to you or his friends. Tonight he proved where they stood because he couldn’t part with them, not seeing how much they were weighing him down. You couldn’t save him. He needed to do that on his own.

Walking away wasn’t giving up. It showed how much strength and love you had for yourself.

You would be okay.

Three years later

You weren’t the biggest fan of moving, but you were excited about the new journey you were about to embark on. The upside was that you allowed yourself to get rid of a lot of unnecessary items you’ve been holding onto for too long.

“Babes!” A shout comes from what used to be your bedroom.

“What’d you find?”

You make your way and find your best friend, Thea, digging around an old box labeled Don’t Open. She didn't listen as she had different items displayed on the floor.

“What is all of this?”

Memories.

It was hard to part with these items a few years ago. They meant too much for you to throw them out.

You sigh, recognizing the old Joni Mitchell record, Blue, and a tattered Rolling Stone shirt. “They were from my last relationship.”

Thea gasps, “these are Harry’s stuff.” Realization hits her, seeing all the stuff you once considered so important. “Why was it hiding in the back of the closet? Are you leaving it here?”

“Forgot about it, honestly.”

“Can I keep the record? It looks well taken care of even though the sleeve looks damaged.”

You laugh, “it’s yours if you really want it.”

“Amazing,” she cheers.

The record played around your apartment for the longest time. You found it on your second date at a flea market, and Harry had told you that he had to hear how it sounded. It was a perfect album; after that, it became your album, always playing when he came for a visit or you were cooking together. You used any excuse to listen to it. After the breakup, it took you a long time until you could listen to Joni Mitchell without thinking of him.

You take a peak at a few remaining items, mainly handwritten letters and poems, and you know it is time to throw them out. You were happy. There was no need to reminisce about the past.

“I can dump this all out.”

“Or,” Thea starts, and you already know where she’s going with this.

“Don’t say it.”

“You ended on bad terms. Closure is good, babes.”

You sigh, “not everyone needs it. I’m really happy. The happiest I’ve ever been.”

Thea nods, “that’s very true. You’re a shining star now.”

You leave Thea to keep looking at the items, knowing she would be a good friend to pack it all up again. There is no need for all that in your life.

“Baby?”

You and Thea look at each other with identical grins as you’re quick to drop the small duffle bag in your hand. You walk out to see your boyfriend of two years, holding a cup holder with three coffees and iced water and a bag of jalapeno bagels in another. The aroma was quick to settle in the empty living room.

“Hi,” you breathe out, taking him in. You’d never get tired of looking at him.

He turns, a giant grin on his smile. You swore you could see his blue eyes sparkling as he looked at you dressed in a black corduroy dungaree. It was a moving day, so you kept it casual and comfortable, wanting to be able to move and carry boxes around. Alex looked at you as if you were the most beautiful woman. It makes your heart grow every time.

“We got everything finished. Augustus is surprisingly a big fan of organization and had everything done on time.” Alex places everything on the empty counter before coming over to you and giving you a kiss hello. You melted in his arms, loving how perfectly you fit together.

“Missed you,” you murmured against his lips.

“Missed you too. Sad you made us spend the night apart.”

You giggle, “you needed to say goodbye.”

“Yeah, I had to take a final cold shower as the boiler was again not working.”

You wince, knowing you’ve had your fair share of cold showers in his apartment, but he always found a way to warm you up, even if it resulted in the need for a second shower.

“Well, never again,” you remind him.

“Mhm, and I’m so lucky you know why?”

You tilt your head, peering up at him. You have to admit seeing those gorgeous blue eyes every day would be a huge blessing. No longer having to wait for the end of each other’s work day. Instead, he would be the first thing you see every morning. You did not want to look away the first time you laid eyes on him. Alex is beautiful, and you love telling him because the blush that settles on his face every time makes you feel warm inside because you’re the one making him react and feel loved. You’re certain Alex is your other half. No one has ever made you feel completely at ease as he has.

“Why, precious?”

“Because all my showers will be with you.”

“All of them,” you question.

“Yes, sugar. Every single one. We’ll be saving water,” he adds on.

“Somehow, I doubt that.”

Alex laughs, and you hear it echo through the empty living room. You run your hands through his dark chocolate hair, feeling how soft it is, and you know he’s been using your hair treatment even if he denies it every time you ask. “Should I buy two of my hair masks now?”

“What? No, why would you?” Alex asks, confused.

You laugh, moving your hands to cup his face and feeling his beard under your palms. “I know you use it. Might as well have it stocked.”

Alex shrugs, “only if you want to. I’ll even pay for it, baby.”

“I love you,” you bring your lips against his, melting in his arms as he deepens the kiss.

“As cute as you two are, we really need to get those boxes down and get out of here.” Thea interrupts with a smile. “Oh, bagels,” she dives for the bag, giving it a big wif staring at the goods Alex brought them. “You know what? You can carry on. I don’t care.”

“Always good to see you, Thea.”

Thea flips her hair back, flashing him a pearly white grin, “I know, dear Alex. I’m a blessing to all.”

“Go eat, baby. I’ll get the last of the boxes.” Alex gestures where Thea is already digging into the freshly made cream cheese.

“Thank you.” You turn, and Alex gives you a smack on your ass, making you gasp. He shrugs as if saying he can’t help himself.

Two hours later, your stomach is full, and the apartment is empty. Alex did the honor of loading up the last few boxes into the back of his truck. You take one last look at your apartment, and it feels bittersweet to say goodbye because this was the first place you ever called home. It’s where Thea shared that she was Bisexual, and it was the scariest moment for her, but you cried with her telling her you loved her. It’s where you had your first heartbreak and the home where you got to foster baby kittens. So many beautiful stories were created in these four walls, and now you’re leaving to create new ones with Alex.

You were ready for the next chapter.

Alex kissed you quickly, promising he’d be downstairs waiting for you. You told him you didn’t need extra time to say goodbye, but he said to humor him and take five minutes before joining him downstairs. You rolled your eyes but didn’t fight him.

Instead used the time to take a final walk-through, not wanting to forget anything. Your bedroom is something you’re going to miss the most. It has a lake view; every sunset is beautiful to watch here. Alex suggested moving into your apartment, but you wanted to find a place you could build together. You were walking out of the bedroom when you heard a knock on the open door. You frown because all your neighbors knew you were leaving, little Suzy across the door cried because she wouldn’t see you every morning anymore, but you promised to come to babysit her whenever her mother needed a hand.

“Sorry to bother but I heard the apartment was clearing out today and was wondering if I could check it out,” the voice asked.

You walk down the hallway and smile, “you’re free to, but you’ll still have to put in an application with Abi down in the leasing office.”

The man takes a step inside, and you both get a good look at each other. You bite back a gasp, but the man doesn’t hide his shock.

“Y/N,” he breathes out.

You offer him a small smile, “that’s me.”

“It’s uh, Harry.”

The Harry you knew was handsome, dressed to the nines on every occasion, and always had sun-kissed skin. The Harry in front of you was pale, had purple eye bags, and looked lanky like any harsh wind could knock him over.

“I–uh, I didn’t remember you lived here or anything,” he tries to defend, and he looks so scared that you won’t believe him, but you do.

“You’re fine, Harry. It’s been a long time.”

“Three years,” he mutters, but you hear him.

“Are you looking for an apartment?”

“You remember Mitch, quiet long hair?” Harry explains Mitch to a t.

“Mhm,” you hum because you did know Mitch by some odd chance. You saw him at a coffee shop a few months after your breakup with Harry, and you were with your brother-in-law’s sister, who was visiting town, and you thought to introduce them. Sarah and Mitch ended up clicking thanks to you and knew he had his heart set on proposing soon.

“Well, he and his girlfriend Sarah have been talking about moving in together and wanted me to check out this listing we saw opening up,” he tells you.

“Has he proposed then?”

“In a week or so.” Harry frowns. “How’d you know?”

You smile, “Sarah’s my sister-in-law. Her brother married my sister. We’re good friends.”

“Oh,” he lets that sink in.

“She mentioned wanting to be engaged before moving in together.”

“So you and Mitch…are friends?” A look of betrayal sits on his face, and you know Mitch is in for an angry Harry later.

You shrug, “I guess. Don’t hang out too often, but nice to chat with.”

Harry nods, taking in this new information.

“You’re free to look around,” you tell him.

“Is the bedroom view still amazing?”

Your eyes widen in surprise, knowing he caught the moment because his smile grows. “Still as breathtaking as ever.”

He hums. “How have you been?” He asks.

“Really good, moving out, obviously.”

“Outgrew this place?”

You shrug, “something like that.”

Harry was going to ask you another question when a tall, handsome male walked in with something in his hand. “Sugar, I forgot to leave you my key.” Harry frowns. This man can’t be talking to you, can he?

“Alex, I had forgotten all about it?”

You accept the key he placed in your hand, smiling when he leans in to press a kiss to your cheek. You turn back to Harry, your eyes sparkling full of love.

“Harry, this is Alex, my boyfriend. Alex, this is Harry,” you hesitate, “an old friend.”

Alex slides his hand around your waist, looping his index finger tight on your belt loop, and you know he realizes who exactly is standing in front of him. He extends his hand out for Harry to shake, who accepts it without a second thought.

“Nice to meet you.”

“You too,” Harry replies courteously.

“He happened to stop by as I was about to head down. Harry heard about the vacant apartment through the grapevine.”

“What do you think?” Alex asked, wanting to remain polite.

“It’s lovely,” Harry offers, not adding anything more. You know he’s biting back from saying more, and in this moment, you’re grateful.

“Yeah, I tried to convince her I could just move in, but she insisted on finding a place together. Never could tell her no.”

“And I’ve tried. It’s the reason we went skydiving.”

Alex laughs, “at six months together, I was so far gone that if you asked me to sell my soul for eternal life with you, I would have.”

Harry frowns, looking at the two of you and how perfect and loving you seem to be. “How long have you been together?”

“Two years,” you answer with a proud grin.

“That’s amazing.” Not a hint of happiness when he said it.

“Listen, we’ve got to head out, but it was wonderful meeting you, Harry.” Alex begins, and you know it’s true having to meet with the movers at the new house.

“No, of course. Thanks for letting me see inside.” Harry offers awkwardly.

Harry sees as Alex intertwines your hands together, seeing you shine as he presses kiss after kiss to your cheek. He had never seen you this happy.

He walks out of the apartment first, then you and Alex follow. He goes towards the stairs while you use the elevator.

“Harry?” You call out before stepping into the elevator.

“Yeah,” he sounds hopeful.

“Take care of yourself.”

He sighs, nodding, “you too.”

Harry watches the elevator door close, and he knows he will never see you again. You’re happy and in love, and it’s all he wants for you. It took him months after you broke up with him to understand how awful his friends were laughing at his heartbreak, offering themselves to him in trying to forget you, but he never accepted. He thought of different ways to get you back, but Mitch always said it started with giving you time, and now he’s lost you forever. Honestly, Harry wasn’t doing good. He hated the people he called friends, so it led him to have no one.

He was sinking deeper and deeper into a sadness he knew he would never recover from, but it filled him with a piece of peace, knowing you’d be happy and loved.

Maybe knowing you were happy without him would be the start to a new and better life, but he somehow still doubted that.

What do you do when you feel like you’re drowning?

You keep kicking until you reach the surface, and that is what Harry will do, even if it takes him the rest of his life to find the surface again.

thank you so much for reading!

#harry styles #harry styles angst #harry angst #harry x reader #angst #harry x you #pleasing #harry styles fic rec

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spgothkidsheadcanons · 1 year

Note

hi:) making a request for a henrietta x goth lesbian reader!! they’re all hanging out and the boys are silently fighting over the reader, but the moment henrietta makes a move, the reader like IMMEDIATELY shows interest.

I LOVE HENRIETTA SO MUCH IF SHE WERE REAL ID MARRY HER

This was so funny. It kinda gives a little more backstory of my headcanons of them and being grown up.

~~~~~

It had been too long since the goths had actually been around each other. Everyone dispersed after highschool, and with the parting of ways came the familiar drifting of friendships. Not that they didn’t speak with each other, but they only spoke once or twice a month, usually to inform each other of how adult life was going and how their careers were. Michael was the lead singer in a band, Henrietta was an indie model/aspiring clothes designer and Pete was a semi-popular painter with a healthy sized following, and each of them hardly had anytime to follow through with their plans on being close until the end. Which was okay, because they’ve settled on monthly meetings back in their hometown just to catch up.

Pete was the first to arrive seeing as he stayed in South Park. He shared a house with his uncle and saw no point in moving away. Too nervous for big cities and too lazy to go to college, he stayed in his quaint little town, going about his daily life as usual and never complaining, happy to stay where he’s comfortable.

Michael was second, seeing as he moved just a few cities away. He ended up in Denver, Colorado, a large but humble town. There is where he found a few people who needed a singer for their band, and he applied and forgot about it. After getting the job and releasing an album or 2, their band, The Velvet Pulse, began to rise up the chart, and Michael was satisfied with his future.

Henrietta was the last to arrive. After graduating, she moved to Los Angeles, California to pursue a career in fashion design. There was never a large variety of gothic clothes that she could wear comfortably, so she decided to start her own brand. She picked up modeling for some indie clothes brand on the side, finally content with her life.

They met at the Benny’s, as they always did. Everything still looked the same, the wall behind their normal booth still stained yellow from their underage smoking habits, remnants of the times they were the closest with each other. The lights were still obnoxiously bright, the menus were sticky, the coffee burnt. It was disgusting to outsiders, but to the Goths who had come back after so many years away, it was home. Michael sat beside Pete, Henrietta in the bench across from them. The trio were happy to finally be back together, even if they only had 5 days to visit.

“And then we went to New York, and kinda traveled down the east coast.” Michael was telling the two others of how his current tour was going. “The only reason I’m here is because after our show in Atlanta, I kind of maybe snuck away and got on a flight over here. The bus is on its way back, but I wanted to go ahead so I could spend a few days back home before it got here.” he finished, taking a swig of his black coffee. Pete and Henrietta smiled, greatful that the tall goth was still humble. “So when you said you were joining a band, did you expect for it to take off?” Pete asked, lifting his own mug to his lips. Michael shook his head, brows furrowed in thought.

“Not really, but I didn’t care for the fame. I was honestly just bored and sent in an application. Don’t get me wrong, I’m appreciative for where we are now, but I do hate not being able to go in public anymore.” Michael lamented, shrugging his shoulders. “That’s the price you pay, though.” he added, looking down at his cup. “Well, I’m very proud of you,” Henrietta said, shooting a smile at the man, “And Pete, I’m proud of you. Your art is amazing. I’ve been keeping up with your posts on instagram and I’m always blown away.” she turned towards the red and black headed goth. Pete grinned shyly, his cheeks turning red over the compliment. “Thanks, Henri. That means a lot. How are things going with your business?” Pete asked in return. “It’s going, that’s for sure. I started selling some of my finished clothing to some boutiques in LA, and that’s really taken off. Overall, I’m pretty happy about how things are going.” the woman replied, tracing patterns on the table infront of her.

The three continued chatting, not stopping even with the bustling of people around them. Every now and then, the old waitress, Betty, would come and refill their mugs. She had become timid in her older years, no longer fussing at the trio and acting cold to them for just drinking coffee anymore. Instead, she welcomed them warmly, seemingly happy to see her once annoying customers. “How are you kids?” she asked, stopping by their table for the 3rd or 4th time. They struck up conversation, reminiscing on how they used to act hostile towards each other, laughing about the good old days. “Well, I’m glad that you’re all back in town again. My niece is coming to work in a few minutes, she just started and I’m still training her. I hope you don’t mind if she stops by with me.” the waitress informed, before walking over to another table.

Michael, Pete and Henrietta dived back into their own conversation, once again not paying mind to anyone around them. They were absorbed in each other’s lives, wanting to know everything that one another was doing. They could have stayed like that for hours, drinking their bean water all day and all night. Well, that is, until they heard a timid voice that pulled them from their conversation. “Would you like some more coffee?”

The voice wasn’t the same as the old lady’s, and they all turned their attention to the person it came from. At the end of the table stood a young woman, no older than 22. Her (h/c) was pulled up away from her face, a few strands of loose hair falling against her forehead. Her eyes, warm and inviting, were a beautiful (e/c) hue, complimenting her (skin tone) skin. She wore the same blue waitress outfit, complete with a pair of white shoes. In her hand, she held a freshly brewed pot of coffee, a soft smile playing on her lips. Michael couldn’t take his eyes from her, and red began to creep over Pete’s cheeks. The pair stared at her, unable to find the words to talk, stricken by her beauty. Henrietta glared at the duo, a silent way of telling them that they looked like idiots and they needed to get it together.

“Yes, please, if you don’t mind.” the woman finally piped up, drawing her friends out of their love dazed states. The new waitress happily refilled their mugs, turning away from them and moving to the next table. Henrietta grabbed her coffee cup, bringing it up to her mouth. “You guys looked like complete idiots.” she noted, taking a sip of her drink. Now boths men were blushing, looking down at the table while mentally beating themselves up. “Dude, she was beautiful.” Michael finally said, coming to his senses. Pete could only nod, not being able to get her eyes out of his mind. Henrietta rolled her eyes, shaking her head at them.

“Would it be weird to ask for her number?” Michael asked, a grin crossing his face. Pete’s head snapped up at that, his eyes casting a glare to his taller friend. “I don’t think you should. She probably wouldn’t be interested in you.” the shorter male noted, drinking from his cup. “What’s that supposed to mean?” Michael asked defensively, his attention turning to Pete. The man shrugged in response, setting his cup down. “Well, you’re out on tour for months on end, you barely answer your phone as it is, I just don’t see how that would work out.” Pete replied, casting a glance to Michael. The curly haired ravenette raised his eyebrows incredulously, scoffing at his friend’s words. “Listen, you can be jealous or whatever, but I think I have a better chance with her than you do.” he noted, playing the same game Pete was. Michael’s retaliation only added fuel to the fire that was already forming, and soon, the two men were bickering quietly with each other, giving reasons as to why they would be better and reasons the other didn’t have the chance.

Henrietta sighed, her eyes rolling once again. While Michael and Pete were distracted with each other, the goth woman scanned the room, looking for the new waitress. Her eyes landed on the young woman behind the bar, washing dishes as she listened to the older waitress training her. Quietly, Henrietta slid out of the booth, not gaining attention of the two men who were still quietly arguing, and made her way to the bar. Perching herself on the seat infront of the two waitresses, she waited until they took notice of her at the bar.

It was only then that Michael and Pete had turned to Henrietta, wanting to see who she thought the waitress would pick, and noticing that the goth woman was gone. They looked to each other, brows furrowed before scanning the room. Hearing the familiar laughter of their friend, they both turned towards to the bar in time to see the young waitress writing something on a napkin, passing it to Henrietta before giving her a shy smile. The goth woman stood from the bar, walking back over to the booth where she was previously sat. The two males attentions were on her, watching as she nonchalantly picked up her cup, raising it to her lips. “The answer is neither of you. She’s a lesbian.” Henrietta smirked behind her cup, flashing the napkin the waitress had given her, a name and a phone number written in pink on the white paper. The men could only gawk, their cheeks turning red in embarrassment at the fact they acted like stray dogs fighting over a piece of meant. At the end of the night, they left, Michael and Pete having apologized to each other and now playfully giving the silent treatment to their female friend, who turned and shot the waitress a wink before leaving the building.

#sp goth kids #south park goth kids #south park headcanons #sp fanfiction #south park michael #sp michael #south park pete #sp pete #south park henrietta #sp henrietta #sp henrietta biggle #sp pete x reader #sp henrietta x reader #sp michael x reader

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purity-town · 3 months

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Ask responses are typed up & under the cut!

I'm happy I was able to work in some more of the NPCs even if it was just into the background, so I'm glad you're liking seeing them. And yes! I don't have specific measurements on anyone's heights beyond a vague “X is taller than Y,” but she's the tallest member of the cast, all divinity and ancient magics and humanoid-but-not-human. And thanks for reading; I'm glad you're excited for the next chapter!

Andrew much prefers to deflect over lying outright, but if pressed claims to be 26 with a summer birthday (putting him as “29” in the comic now as he's lived in town for 3 years). Mid-twenties roughly aligns with his physical age, as he slowed and eventually stopped aging around that point, so people don't have any obvious reason not to believe it.

In the past, Andrew usually just moved around every long while, assuming things were otherwise peaceful. The jump from “this guy is weird and aging gracefully” to “this is an immortal being inextricably tied to this world and its fate” is quite large, especially since Andrew mostly kept to himself.

Living in Purity Town is a first in many ways for him, particularly in that he's serving an actual purpose to the town and has to both interact with people and stick around for the foreseeable future. Under normal circumstances he would absolutely gracefully arrange his leave, but then once you throw the hero being present into the mix things just get messy.

Honestly, with enough time he probably would come clean to the townsfolk. If he explained it to Chris delicately enough initially, Chris (and Alalia!) would eventually back him up and that'd likely do a lot to sway folks. Between their input and him having just…been around town long enough to show that he’s not a bad person and actually form some relationships, I think it would go okay.

Thank you!!! I'm glad you're liking the comic so much!

Honestly, I have no idea! It's probably a combination of factors in my art style (like my tendency to use solid/clean lines and keep painted portions to the background) playing nice with however Tumblr crunches images. I know that Webtoons struggles a good bit more with my pages due to color/resolution limitations, but Tumblr’s always been pretty good with it. That's all just a rough guess though; I couldn't find your art on your blog to examine so I'm just throwing out ideas!

Possibly relevant, each page is 2320x3587 pixels (350 dpi) after I trim the edges and export it as a .png. Downloading pages from Tumblr saves them as a 1987x3072 (72 dpi) jpeg, but preserves the fine details pretty well. So that’s what we’re working with here!

(Interestingly, after some testing I found that Reddit preserves the higher resolution of pages, but crunches their colors around areas of shading, while Tumblr smoothly fuzzes them when it downscales.)

I'm happy to see more folks caught what I was going for there! I didn't draw much of her shimmered design since she's mostly covered and under some heavy effects, but it was cool to work with. Here's a snippet of her shimmered design in that panel without the effects, since I had it on hand already from a comment a while back.

Thank you!! It feels crazy to me that it's been going on so long, but I'm really happy to have continued with the comic for so long. I'm also happy to be done with college, haha -- I’m liking my new job a lot more than the school grind!

Thank you so much for this!! It’s super touching that you’ve stuck around so long -- I definitely recognize the folks I’ve seen popping up in my notifications over the years, and I’m really glad that people are liking being along for the ride. I’ve learned so much through working on this comic and I’m really really happy that other people are enjoying it too, because I love these characters and this world and this game so so much.

I’m not articulating this well but- thank you for this! I hope that whoever you are, you’re doing well, too :)

Go right ahead! Though this serves as a reminder to myself to make sure that all of the pages on the various sites are all updated, since I usually go back through after a chapter is done to correct little errors, haha.

I totally understand if you want to remain anonymous, but if you need files or anything give a shout here or on Discord (@ariibees)! Purity Town is somewhat formatted for print by virtue of having pages instead of vertical-scrolling but I know that the chapters are kinda short and pages would probably need to be re-formatted around the edges to fit book binding.

All that said -- if you end up going through with it it'd be insanely cool to see how it turns out, if you're comfortable with sharing!

Chapter titles are done in Albertus Medium (with the exception of the "Purity Town" text and character intro bubbles, which is in the Terraria font Andy Bold). Speech bubbles use Segoe Print. There's not really any concrete reasoning behind the fonts I picked (beyond the obvious choice to use the Terraria font), I just chose ones that looked good enough, haha.

#pt asks #purity town #not an update

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hopelesslyfallenninlove · 1 year

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Larissa Weems x Reader ~ Chapter 7: Halloween Break Plans

Every night for this past week Larissa and I have fallen asleep together in her bed. The only time we have spent apart is when we are working and even then it’s a little amount of time apart. It is 1 week till halloween break and you have no plans other than staying at the school, Larissa and you haven’t talked about whether or not you’d spend the break with each other. Since it is Friday which we have designated as our date night I have decided to inquire about halloween break see if she has any plans. We switch off every Friday of who gets to plan it and it is my turn, as soon as I am done with my last class I start getting everything ready. I decided on a nice and relaxing night for a candle light dinner and I am making Lasagna with homemade garlic bread and a delicious red wine. I set everything up in Larissa’s room to make sure that the lighting is dim and everything is in place right as she is done for the day. As soon as Larissa enters the room and sees the dim lighting and the table set her eyes immediately start to water and as soon as her eyes meet mine the tears roll down her cheeks. I go up to her and pull her into my arms waiting for her to calm down. “Oh, love. What is it? Did you have a bad day?” I question wanting to know what I can do to help. Larissa shakes her head and pulls away.

“No, no, everything’s perfect. I’ve just never had someone do something like this for me before and make me feel so worthy of love and happiness. They are happy tears my dear. “ She pulls me into a passionate kiss, after a few moments we pull away.

“Come on my love, let’s eat before it gets any colder.” She lets out a small chuckle and lets me lead the way to the table where I pull her chair out and then go to my seat. We both talk about our day, the upcoming school events after halloween break and for the rest of the year seeing as Larissa likes to start planning things months in advance. When we finished our main course I went and grabbed the dessert. I made a chocolate lava cake. I take this as my time to ask about Halloween break. “So.. Do you have any plans for the break?” I immediately cringe after I ask because of the shake to my voice. Larissa smiles gently at me and reaches for my hand.

“I do, yes, and I was actually going to ask if you wanted to spend it with me. However before you say yes.. I have been invited like I am every year to the Addams family mansion for their annual Halloween party. Now, I don’t want you to feel pressured into going if you don’t want to but, this has been the only year I’ve actually wanted to go because I have you. I honestly don’t understand why Morticia still invites me as I’ve never been to a single one. But will you Y/F/N go to the party and spend the break with me?” Larissa asks with a soft smile with hope filling her eyes. Hummm a Addams family party should be interesting and considering Wednesday knows about Larissa and I, we won’t have to hide our feelings.

“Of course, I would be honored to, my love” I quickly reply.

“Perfect, I will send the RSVP first thing tomorrow morning. We will leave Friday after school, and don’t you worry I will handle everything else, you just pack a bag.” Larissa finishes the last bite of the cake. I suggest that we watch a movie and that she should get outta her work clothes and into something more comfortable while I wash up the dishes. As soon as I am done I join Larissa on the couch, she picks a romantic movie and we cuddle up on her couch. I don’t know when but we both ended up falling asleep on the couch. I got up and picked Larissa up to take her to bed, so we won’t be sore tomorrow from sleeping on the couch all night.

I wake up still in Larissa’s embrace, I sit there for a few moments before I get up to go to the bathroom. After I finish doing my morning routine brushing my hair and teeth, I decide that I want to hop down to town to get something to drink for both of us before Larissa wakes up. I get dressed and start heading to the parking lot. “Ms. Y/L/N, wait up” I hear Wednesday call out and hear her fast steps towards me. I slow my steps before stopping and turning around to face her.

“Hello, Wednesday, what can I do for you?”

“Are you heading into town?” Wednesday says as she finally catches up to me.

“Why, yes I am heading into town but only to grab some coffee at the WeatherVane, are you needing to go into town as well?” I question.

“Yes, I want to get some coffee for Enid and I. May I come with you? Are you getting Weems a hot chocolate?” Wednesday replies with a teasing tone one only someone can tell if they are closely listening.

“Yes, you may come with and I just might be why do you ask?” As I say this I turn to get into the car as Wednesday also gets in before she responds.

“Well considering you and Weems are together, and I imagine that you are a good girlfriend. I assume that you are joining Weems at my family's Halloween party. I must let you know that back when my mother and Weems went to school here they had some sort of thing briefly before my mother and father got obsessed with each other. So that being said there may be some tension and I am letting you know so you don’t get hurt. Believe it or not you are my only teacher that is tolerable and that is more than adequate in their subject.” Wednesday says as we drive to town.

“Okay, I will keep that noted and yes Larissa and I are planning on going. Also since you seem to know about us we won't have to hide either.” I respond and Wednesday just hums and for the rest of the ride we sit in a comfortable silence. Right as we park my phone starts to ring, I tell Wednesday to head inside and I will be in, in a minute. As soon as Wednesday closes the door and answers my phone. “Good Morning, my beautiful goddess. How did you sleep, my love?”

“Good Morning, Darling. I slept wonderfully but when I woke up a little sad that you were not here. Where did you go, my little dove?” Larissa sleepily rasps out over the phone.

“I am just down at the WeatherVane getting coffee for myself and hot chocolate for you. Also I am with Wednesday so I should probably go before she starts something.” I let out a chuckle, Larissa chuckled as well and we said our goodbyes and see you laters. I head into the cafe and order our drinks and wait with Wednesday by the counter. As soon as we get out drinks we head back to the school. When I get into Larissa’s room I see her on the couch talking on the phone. I walk up to her and hand her a drink and make my way to sit next to her.

“Yes Morticia, I will be attending this year and with a date, I’ve already told you that. Now stop acting like this is some sort of miracle, we will see you at the party. Goodbye.” Larissa tells the person who is now known as Morticia and hangs up. “That woman, I swear she thinks that no one is interested in me. We will show her.” Larissa lets out a sigh and looks over to me and smiles. “Thank you for the hot chocolate dear, did Wednesday cause any trouble.” Larissa places a hand on my leg.

“No, she was actually quite pleasant. Maybe that’s because I’m her favorite” I shrug and smile back. Larissa hums and we sit in a comfortable silence as we drink our drinks. We finish the weekend relaxing with each other and wishing this next week goes by fast.

So far the week has been good but why does today Thursday of all days feel like something is going to go wrong. It's the end of the school day so I’m grading last minute assignments. Well that’s when Wednesday comes rushing into my office… “Ms. Y/L/N I don’t think I can go home tomorrow” Never in my life have I seen Wednesday like this.

“What’s going on Wednesday?” I gently ask.

“Enid just got word that her parents are taking her tomorrow after school for that camp you promised that you wouldn’t let them take her. They weren’t supposed to take her till the end of the year, what are we going to do.” I see a few tears run down but I don’t acknowledge them knowing Wednesday does not like to show emotions.

“What was Enid supposed to do during break?” I ask while going through different possibilities.

“Well, she was going to stay here with Ajaxs and Yoko.” Wednesday says while looking down.

“Okay, when are you leaving tomorrow?” I already have the plan in mind.

“What? Did you just not hear what I said, I. Am. NOT. LEAVING.” Wednesday looks up and says with her voice getting louder and louder.

“Will you answer the damn question, Addams” I responded back. Wednesday seems to pull herself together before speaking again.

“I’m sorry Ms. Y/L/N. I’m leaving around noon tomorrow.” Wednesday says while looking down again.

“What time does Enid's mom going to get here tomorrow?” I question and Wednesday seems to catch on to what I’m saying.

“After school, around 3:30pm” Wednesday replies.

“Good, now is there a way I can contact your mother and father right now?” I say with determination.

“Yes, my crystal ball. It’s in my room, come on” Wednesday rushes out and I follow after. We make it to her room and I immediately see Enid on her bed in a ball.

“Enid, honey, get your bags pack you are going with Wednesday tomorrow at noon.” I calmly said and Wednesday already has her parents on the ball. “Hi, Mr and Mrs Addams-“

“Oh please call us Gomez and Morticia” Morticia says with a sly smile.

“I know that you don’t know me, but I need your help. Wednesday roommate Enid, her parents are trying to send her to conversion camp. Wednesday and I are trying to stop that from happening because those places are just horrible. So I guess I’m trying to ask if it is it okay for Enid to go by you this break, Larissa and I will be there as well so you don’t have to worry about watching her. I just don’t know what else to do to protect her this time since it was short notice.” I eventually get out and I see Gomez with a huge smile on his face when I mentioned Larissa and Morticia just twitch her eyebrow up.

“Of course she can come. Our little rain cloud can be so protective.” Gomez says with a proud smile on his face. “The car will be there around noon so she can ride with Wednesday.” He finishes.

“Thank you so much Mr and Mrs Addams. I truly appreciate it, and I know Enid does too” I say with a soft smile.

“We shall see you all tomorrow then” Morticia says then hangs up.

I turn around and look at the girls giving them a soft smile. “I don’t think your mother likes me Wednesday” I chuckle and stand “but that’s alright I suppose just as long as Enid is protected and safe. Now you both get some sleep and make sure you are gone by noon. Do you both understand?” They both nod and I head out to go inform Larissa of the plan. As soon as I enter Larissa’s room she smiles wide. “Hello, love. How was your day today?” I say as I come up to her to give her a hug.

“It was good, I can’t wait for break though, these kids might just kill me” Larissa chuckles and pulls away just enough so she can see my face. “How was your day dear?” I let out a big sigh.

“It was definitely a day, I had a little impromptu call with Mr and Mrs Addams, because Enid got word her mother was coming tomorrow to take her to the camp so Wednesday and I came up with the plan that Enid will be spending the break there and will leave tomorrow before her mother gets here.” I pause to take a breath before continuing “oh and I’m pretty sure Morticia does not like me but Gomez seemed to be happy, anyways don’t you worry about Enid’s mother I will take care of her tomorrow you just get everything ready for our break.” I cup Larissa’s cheek and lean in to give her a soft kiss.

“I think Morticia is just upset that she was wrong in thinking that no one could want me. Quick thinking if Enid stays with Wednesday, I know she won’t let anyone hurt her, she is just as overprotective as Gomez.” Larissa kisses the top of my head. “Now how about you take a bath and relax before your fight with Enid’s mom tomorrow.” I nod and go into the bathroom getting the tub ready.

“Larissa?” I call out to her.

“Yes, dear?” Larissa responds while coming to the bathroom door. I open it and see her holding 2 wine glasses.

“Can- will you join me?” I say softly.

“Of course dear. Here you go.” Larissa hands me one of the wine glasses and gets into the bathroom and removes her clothing and gets in the tub first. “Come sit in front of me” I do as she says, removing the robe I had on and sit in front of Larissa, still holding my wine. Larissa snakes a hand around and holds me snug to her. We sit in there till we both are pruned then get out to get ready for bed. “Everything is gonna be okay, love. Don’t worry. I love you” Larissa says into the night before we fall asleep.

“I hope so, I love you too” I whisper out and fall fast asleep soon after.

#larissa weems x reader #lgbt #lesbians

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nuclearjacks · 2 months

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4, 16 and 33 for the artists ask game

This is a long post so be warned kdjcjdkdjd vvv

4. A piece you wish got more love

Probably most of my content that isn’t TF related! Would love more interactions on my OC/Sona and other fandom content, especially my BG3 art right now, but I also understand as someone who’s interest based why that stuff usually doesn’t perform well djxndjdj

A lot of people follow an artist for one particular thing and when they don’t make that particular thing, people usually aren’t that interested unless you followed an artist for their style or something (is my assumption anyways djdjdjdj)

Some examples here below vvv (all of which you can find if you search my art tag: jaxsart on my profile!)

But I will say the non TF content that I think was really well received was my Spidersona <3 I got a wonderful fanart piece for her and I’m so happy people loved her design cause I was also really proud and happy with how she turned out. Still planning to make more content for her in the future! She’s pictured below here vvv

16. How do you motivate yourself to draw?

I’m honestly still figuring that one out lol

I usually only draw when I want to since I’m not an artist who relies on commissions or the like to keep myself afloat. But I’ve also been hitting an art funk as of late and while I do want to draw, it’s been really hard to draw cause of the skill I want to incorporate in my drawings now. It either takes me longer or I end up hating the process because of how long it takes or because of how hard it is. So that effects my motivation heavily because all the cons stated above is what makes me not want to draw 😅

I’m currently trying to find a balance of what makes me happy while drawing and how to make my art look good to myself again since I’ve been hating it so much. I’ve been looking into different techniques, learning more in depth lighting and shading techniques and need to do more anatomy studies as that’s getting rusty again and I’ve been getting lazy cjxndjdj

All in all, I still draw when I want to, but I think the big motivating factor is wanting to see the end product. I just want to be able to finish the WIPS I have and the visions I see in my head and get them out into the world so others can see them too. I wanna say that I finally made that thing or actually did it!! That’s probably my biggest motivating factor right now. But we’re still figuring it out 😊

33. Have you taken a lot of art classes?

I took a handful as a kid, got to play with pastels once, made clay art, learned photoshop, learned to paint, a whole bunch of stuff! My parents have always been very supportive of my art and really helped foster a lot of that so I went to plenty of classes through out my childhood and teen years.

When I was in college, the last classes I took were all for my bachelors (which I dropped out of later on cjcjdjfj). I think the most helpful one was my life drawing class though. I’m gonna do one of those stereotypical artist things where I *highly* recommend you take a life drawing class if you want to learn more about anatomy or different techniques to implement into your art. They’re so good for growing your skill massively in a short period of time. My first drawings we did for gesture drawing look horrid compared to my later studies!

Always always always take a life drawing class if you’re able!

Thank you for the asks! <3

#artist ask game #art #jaxsart

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chimcess · 2 years

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The Spork {M.Y.G.} (2)

Pairing: Yoongi x Reader Other tags: Journalist! Yoongi, Artist! Reader, Coworkers to Lovers, Starving Artist! Yoongi, Pianist! Yoongi, Yoongi pining over his ex heavy in the beginning, Smut Word Count: 2.6k Genre: Coworkers to lovers! AU, Angst, Slow Burn, Eventual Fluff, Mutual Pining, Pining over Ex Synopsis: Min Yoongi is by all accounts a loser- well according to his girlfriend anyway. After losing his job at Five Guys, Park Bitna finally kicks their 8-year relationship to the curb and now he is desperately trying to win her back, even going back into the world of journalism to make things right. After getting a job at humor magazine, The Spork, Yoongi meets Y/N, an anti-social cartoonist with mommy issues. Together, the two hatch up a plan to help Yoongi get Bitna back, but what happens when Yoongi realizes that maybe his dreams are different now? Warnings: Talks of depression, talk of antidepressants (for like two seconds), Huge insecurity issues, Reader has mommy issues, mentions of past eating disorder (Please be cautious), They’re massive idiots, alcohol consumption, Oral (f receiving), Dirty Talk, Pretty vanilla, soft Yoongi, fluffy smut, lots of kisses, pretty tame honestly, they do it on top of the piano, multiple smut scenes A/N: So... it’s been a while...(7 months) hehe. Hear me out, this story has been impossible to write! I’ve been doing more deleting than writing and it was beginning to get frustrating so I may have taken a tiny break. I’m hoping after I get this out in the void and continue working on other things in between parts that I can keep my momentum. She’s a bit short (I’m sorry) but something is better than nothing (I hope), and there is a massive content warning as the ED talking begins here. PLEASE, do not read if it will trigger you. Also, we have updated the banner for this baby. Still not sure how happy I am with it but definitely better than previous versions. Playlist

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Bowling came faster than Yoongi was expecting. Jungkook and Taehyung had picked him up from his apartment. Y/N lived down the street from the alley and walked. They were all paid for and ready to go. Yoongi felt nervous during the drive and at ease all at once. The two men had never brought up Yoongi’s panic attack nor the cold behavior afterward, and while he was grateful, he felt on edge about it. Sooner or later they would. He felt embarrassed at the idea. Y/N being around made him feel more at ease about the situation. She had not brought it up again and he now had almost an entire drawer in his office filled with sticky notes. They started to eat together every other day, and Jungkook was sad that he never got to spend time with his “nonna” anymore. Y/N would make sure to take him out when the pouting became too much. Yoongi ate with Hoseok and Namjoon on those days much to his dismay. Namjoon was incredibly awkward to be around.

“You any good at bowling, hyung?” Taehyung teased, taking off his seatbelt.

Yoongi had not realized that they had arrived.

“No,” Yoongi deadpanned. “This is my second least favorite thing to do.”

“What’s the first?” Jungkook piped in, grinning widely.

“Roller skating.”

Seokjin was at their table waiting for them. Y/N was nowhere in sight. Yoongi panicked but did not show it. He needed to be okay without her here all the time. He liked these guys. He had little contact with Seokjin aside from his rants with Jungkook but he was a nice guy. He was married with kids, always talked about his dinner parties, and Yoongi was almost positive the guy was the loudest but most polite person he had ever met.

It was odd to see everyone dressed down. Everyone, aside from Y/N, always dressed professionally. Seokjin wore designer suits along with Taehyung. Yoongi did not even realize Jungkook had a full sleeve. He had always worn long sleeves and only the small tattoos on his hand were visible. Now, they were all wearing stereotypical bowling team shirts, Jungkook had got a few extra shirts from his real bowling team, and gave the once pristine white and shell pink button-ups a god-awful tie-dye job. He had changed the name to “Spork Fraternization” on the back along with a very poor quality .jpg of a stock image of a woman eating a salad. It still had the “Shutter Stock” watermarks on it. Yoongi was glad Jungkook did not have enough time to make him one.

Seokjin smiled at him.

“Hey, Yoon the Goon. What’s up? Y/N invite you?” Hoseok had everyone at work calling him that now.

Yoongi nodded.

“Well, welcome to the team! You’re the ref, right?”

He nodded again.

“Make sure no one cheats. Jin Hyung always finds a way.” Jungkook joked.

“It’s literally impossible to cheat at bowling.” Seokjin snapped, annoyed and defensive. “There’s already a computer keeping count!”

“Well, actually…” Jungkook began a rant and rave about the different ways you could theoretically cheat at bowling.

Seokjin grew more displeased. Taehyung looked amused. Yoongi felt himself relaxing.

“Why do you always pick a fight with me?” Jin accused, voice high pitched.

“I’m not ‘picking a fight,’ I’m just picking on you.” Jungkook laughed.

“You two are by far the most annoying people I have ever met.” Y/N seemingly came from nowhere. Yoongi felt his heart rate speed up at the sound of her voice.

It was the first time Yoongi had ever seen her in jeans. Y/N was wearing the ugly bowling shirt and tucked it into a pair of stone-washed ripped jeans. They were baggy and did not do much for her shape but Yoongi still found them unbelievably attractive. Her hair was styled differently than normal. It was usually a messy, low effort, just rolled out of bed. Tonight it was brushed and tied back into a sleek ponytail. Yoongi noticed she was wearing a tiny bit of makeup as well. She looked pretty in her baggy jeans and white Air Force Ones. He wanted to see her like that more often even if he did miss the way she looked in those Superman pajama bottoms.

“Sorry about them. They don’t know when to shut up. Ever.” Y/N gave Yoongi a huge smile and wrapped her arm around him in greeting.

Yoongi was so shocked he did not get to return the gesture. Y/N never made physical contact with him before. This was totally new for Yoongi and he enjoyed it as much as it made him feel guilty. Because when she touched him like that all he could think about was the way Bitna used to hold him and he wanted it to stop. He wanted to enjoy himself without this shadow looming over him. He tapped her shoulder lightly and she backed off. He let out a sigh and relaxed once more. He noticed her tablet glove had been replaced with a bowling glove like Jungkook’s. Yoongi felt himself get disappointed. It was as though the woman from work was gone and the only remaining quality was her dry humor.

“Sexy jeans, Y/N.” Jin joked, tongue overdramatically running over his lower lip.

“Virgin, Jin.”

Yoongi was not sure if he had seen any of the men laugh harder. His own smile took over his face without much help. That comforting feeling was back. He quickly realized that as long as he did not focus on how foreign she looked, Yoongi was able to drown in the overwhelming calm that overtook him in Y/N’s presence. Ever since the anxiety attack, Yoongi had been even more attached to her than before. He even texts her at least once a day outside of work. Yoongi hated texting.

Y/N had not brought up Bitna once since she blew him off. Yoongi was grateful for that. Jimin had asked him about it the day after it happened, and after Yoongi explained the situation, it seemed like Jimin was everywhere. It was beginning to become annoying even if Yoongi appreciated the kindness behind his actions. Y/N was right when she told him Jimin was the nicest guy in the world. To a fault at times.

The bowling match started off strong, Yoongi doing nothing but eating some pretzel bites he got at the snack bar and sipping a whiskey on the rocks. Jungkook and Y/N, dubbed Big Meow, were in the lead but Taehyung and Jin were only five points behind. It was quite amusing. Apparently, both teams felt the need to heckle the other in the most obnoxious ways possible. Every time that team Big Meow won, a name Yoongi still was not sure made a lick of sense considering the context, Y/N and Jungkook would wave around the speedos the boys were supposed to wear. In return, Jin would scream “Get Milked, bitches” and chest bump Taehyung. Very entertaining.

“Having fun?” Y/N asked, still breathless from a round of laughter after Jin managed to slip before taking his shot. Everyone decided that it counted.

“Yeah, you guys are something else.” Yoongi smiled and took another small sip from his drink. It was far too expensive to buy another one.

“Can’t wait to watch them streak through Seoul.”

“Where are you taking them?” Another sip.

“Namjoon’s band is playing at Eat Milk. We go inside and split up, the guys order a drink from the bar, go to the front row and get Joon’s attention. Start stripping and get the hell out of there before security gets to them.”

“Sounds like Namjoon-shi is also getting punished.” He finished off his last pretzel.

“Yeah, well he fucked up our performance reviews under the basis of ‘being disruptive at work,’ so we decided to show him how disruptive we can be.” Y/N asked Jungkook to grab her water when she noticed the younger man going to the restroom.

“Speaking of,” Yoongi ran his fingers through his hair and leaned back. “What’s a Fat Lard Challenge?”

“Only the most intense food challenge in South Korea,” Taehyung, as per usual, came from seemingly nowhere.

“Jesus man, you got to stop doing that shit.” Yoongi glared.

“My bad, anyway,” Taehyung started whispering as though this were some secret. “Fat Lard is crazy. You have one hour to eat a 4lb burger with eight slices of bacon, four slices of cheese, and four fried eggs. Plus a side of fries. You win, it’s free and you get a shirt. You lose, you get a picture on the loser board, spanked with a paddle, and you have to pay for it.”

“How much?”

“About $50,” Y/N replied casually.

“Can you eat that?” Yoongi looked Y/N up and down, not believing for a second she stood a chance.

She suddenly wrapped her arms around herself. Y/N had had an odd look on her face, one Yoongi could not decipher, but he felt like he had upset her in some way. Scared. Y/N looked scared. He scrambled to figure out why she would respond to his obvious joke in such a strong way. Taehyung was strangely quiet as well.

“Jungkook is the one doing the challenge. Only one person can do it. I’m just moral support.” Her voice was as small as she looked at that moment.

It was her turn once again and Y/N took her first shot. She knocked down four on her first roll and the rest on her second. Jungkook had returned for his turn and gave Y/N her water before getting into another ego contest with Jin. She did not join in this time and returned to their table. Yoongi tried to apologize but could not figure out what to say. The rest of their bowling match went on. Jin, Taehyung, and Jungkook were all yelling at one another, and Y/N and Yoongi sitting in a tense silence while she waited for her turn. For the first time since their friendship had started Yoongi did not know what to say.

“Don’t take it personally,” Jungkook had sat across from Yoongi, he had not noticed. Y/N was gone. “She went to the bathroom.”

“Is she okay?”

“She’ll be fine,” Jungkook smiled sadly. “Just try to refrain from food talk. She’s been talking to her mom again and it’s been rough. I’m sure you know all about that trainwreck.”

“Uh,” Yoongi shook his head. “I mean, sort of. Y/N hasn’t really gotten into it with me herself. Yoona briefly bought it up when Bitna stopped by but that’s about it.”

“Oh, shit,” Jungkook blurted, “Well, it’s something. She’ll talk about it eventually but don’t bring it up.”

“Yeah, man. No problem.”

“I’ll get you a drink at the restaurant.”

“Sounds good to me.”

Again her mother had been brought up as a point of contention. Yoongi tried to imagine Y/N’s family and could only think of other smart-ass, funky artsy types, but that was not the case. Apparently, Y/N’s mother was like a wicked stepmother and no one really seemed to like her. Not even her daughter. Yoongi wondered why she would talk to someone who hurt her so badly that her coworkers knew all about it but knew that it was hypocritical of him. He had had a meltdown over a woman. This was someone’s mother.

Y/N came back about five minutes later and sat beside Yoongi. He tensed up but did not move away. He enjoyed the proximity but felt clueless. Should he apologize? Then again he had no idea what to apologize for. Yoongi did not have to think for long. Y/N leaned over and asked him to go outside with her. Yoongi nodded and quickly followed behind her. No one in the group asked about it and Jungkook took her turn with no complaints. Again, Yoongi felt the overwhelming emotions he had the other day. He would never regret working with them.

It was windy out but still hot. The humidity made Yoongi break out into a sweat and he felt the pit in his stomach getting deeper. He did not like confrontation and he was afraid he had pushed away his friend. Anxiety bubbled in his chest but he attempted to ignore it. He reminded himself of the kind of person she was and it soothed him if only for a few seconds. The anxiety only grew the longer she stayed silent.

“I’m sorry about getting all weird in there,” Y/N finally spoke. “I’m so used to everyone knowing all about me that I can forget you don’t. I think it’s why I enjoy spending time with you so much.”

Yoongi remained quiet. He figured she just wanted him to listen right now. Bitna never just listened. She always had to say something o provide input and it bothered him. He did not want to push Y/N any more than she wanted to be. He would listen and stay quiet.

“I know you’re probably really confused. It’s a long story but I’ll just spare you the details.”

“You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to,” Yoongi voiced, “I don’t want you to feel forced.”

Y/N smiled into the distance.

“It’s okay. You got vulnerable with me so I’ll return the favor.”

She took a deep breath before finally looking Yoongi in the eye.

“I’m recovering from an eating disorder I’ve been struggling with since I was 12.”

Y/N took another deep breath and Yoongi heard the way she choked up. It broke his heart.

“It moved from calorie counting to starving myself, and by the time I was a freshman in college, I was bulimic. I didn’t start getting better until after I graduated and was sent to a psych ward after being hospitalized for malnutrition. I was sent to an inpatient center for a few months after that. I think that’s when Little Meow and Big Kitty started, and Jimin and I started talking about opening our own magazine company. The Spork was born and we bought the building after I was released.”

Yoongi did not say anything and neither did she. The pair stood outside, the sweat building up, and staring straight ahead. The man did not know what to say. How do you react to that? Should he talk about his own mental health? Maybe bring up his days of locking himself in his dorm room waiting on God to just let him die? However, he did not do either one of those things. Instead, he stood tall next to his friend, completely quiet, and reached out to place a hand on her head.

“I’m sorry for hurting your feelings.”

“Yoongi, it’s fine-” She brushed his hand off.

“No,” The man made a point to keep eye contact. “It doesn’t matter if I knew or not, I still made you upset and I’m sorry. I’ll be more considerate next time. I promise.”

Y/N closed her mouth and looked away. Yoongi was worried he had upset her again. He had meant it, he did want to apologize, but he could see how it could upset her. He contemplated saying sorry again but found himself unable to figure out what he was saying sorry for in the first place. Before he could gather his thoughts, Y/N faced him again and this time placed her head on his chest. The two of them stayed like that, silent and unmoving until the three men came outside yelling about Jungkook’s landslide victory.

Taglist:

@hobipost @rottenandpretty @pb89nv @screaching-cookie @mochieverything @almosttoopizza @youurkryptonite @ysljoon @gfksz @tarahardcore

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punchdrunkdoc · 2 years

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Updated K-drama list (9)

Wow, its been a WHILE since I’ve done one of these! I haven’t watched as many new shows as I’d have liked in the past couple of years (my watchlist is out of control!) but I thought it was time to add them here. Its mostly for my benefit, so I can keep track of what I’ve seen, but if you’re looking for recommendation or you’re a newby to Kdramas wondering where to start, I hope this helps!

The GREAT (i.e. my top 21 - I couldn’t narrow it down to an even 20!)

1. Its Ok To Not Be Okay

A children’s author with antisocial personality disorder becomes obsessed with a handsome (but closed-off) carer in a mental health hospital.

I could (and already have) written loads about this show - it became my all-encompassing obsession for the 8 weeks it was on telly. I LOVE IT SO MUCH!! I had a feeling only 1 episode in that it might become my all-time favourite K-drama, and I was right. The quality never dropped for a moment, and it absolutely nailed the ending.

I pretty much love everything about it - the whimsical, fairytale-esque tone, the music, the costumes, the supporting characters, the side-plots exploring different mental health issues, the humour, the set design, even the opening credits!

The two leads are so beautiful with SO MUCH chemistry that you could watch them read a phone book and it would be hot. But it became a real three-hander of a show, with the male lead’s autistic brother forming an integral part of the relationship dynamic.

Honestly, I can’t do this show justice with such a short review - just WATCH IT!!

Male lead: Soooo handsome, quiet and compassionate but with a steel core; it’s so fun watching him come out of his shell. Actor also seen in (AASI): My Love from a Star (honestly, he didn’t make much of an impression in that show, but he was amazing in this - he conveys so much emotion with the most subtle facial movements)

Female lead: Absolutely fascinating; so wounded and vulnerable, but projecting this awesome, no-fucks-given, blunt-as-hell exterior. Actress also seen in (AASI): Lawless Lawyer, Hwarang (minor character)

2. Crash Landing on You

He’s from North Korea. She’s from South Korea. They never should have met, but they’ll change each other’s lives.

This was my first K-drama, and although it’s been knocked off the top spot, it’s still fantastic. Its the full package - the entire cast of characters is great, the lead romance is ANGSTALICIOUS and its genuinely, laugh out loud funny (when its not making you cry or swoon). I’ve since discovered that they had a North Korean defector as a consultant working on the show, so apparently the NK scenes are fairly accurate which is SUPER interesting.

Male lead: Officially the best boyfriend ever - absolutely nails the small, romantic gestures. AASI: Hyde, Jekyll & Me.

Female lead: Smart, sassy, and funny. I love her.

3. Red sleeve - NEW ENTRY

A court romance between the leader of Joseon - who believes his duty is to his country first above love - and a headstrong court lady who wants to protect the life she has chosen

This is, without doubt, the best historical Kdrama I’ve ever seen. Sorry, Love in the Moonlight, you’ve been kicked out of the top 10!

The whole thing is beautifully made, from the gorgeous music and cinematography, to the fully realised characters, to the slow-burn pace of the heart-wrenchingly beautiful, bittersweet love story. Speaking of the which, I didn’t realise when I started the show that it was based on a true story. I ended up googling the ending, and I’m glad I did, because it helped prepare me for the last episode (top tip: If you want a happy ending I’d advise skipping that episode; but if you enjoy crying for 90mins straight, watch it). The two leads of the show are phenomenal - especially Lee Jun-Ho. He will tear your heart out.

Male lead - Has the weight of the world on his shoulders. You really feel it when he becomes torn between his duty and his heart. A brilliant performance. AASI: Just between lovers.

Female lead: Funny and clever with a core of steel. You can absolutely see how she steals the King’s heart.

4. W - Two worlds

A surgeon gets sucked into the world of her father’s webtoon when the main character’s life is threatened.

This was a WILD ride! The first 4 episodes barrelled through plot at an amazing rate and certain events happen in episode 5 that had me wondering how the show could even continue! But it did…and the plot just got more insane! I loved this show SO much. It kept me guessing, had me on the edge of my seat, and even had room for some of my favourite romance tropes. The central relationship was great, and (because of the insane plot) you basically get 2 love stories for the price of 1. It keeps creeping up my rankings because its a show I come back to again and again.

Male lead: Just a really, really cool guy. Can’t think of how else to describe him! Always in control, calm, unflappable, analysing the situation….but he can break out the cocky charm when needed. AASI: While you were sleeping, Doctor Stranger

Female lead: I really liked her - she had more agency than a lot of other female heroines and I really related to her freaked-out panic in the beginning when she didn’t feel like she was a capable enough doctor to save a life.

5. Itaewon Class

A young man’s life is forever altered when he runs afoul of a powerful family.

This felt like a big step up in quality from everything else in this list, in terms of the production, soundtrack (which was brilliant), the lack of twee sound effects, and just the overall ‘real world’ feel of the show. All of the characters were fleshed out and 3-dimensional, and they all had their ‘moment’ to shine. The story itself was gripping and so well done - some of the twists and reveals had me gasping! And what can I say about the 2 leads? I love them, both separately, and together. He is so wise beyond his years, and his journey will break your heart and inspire you. She is borderline sociopathic, but I adore her.

Male lead: Tenacious, principled, kind, innocent, caring, driven, loyal…and he can cook! AASI: What’s wrong with secretary Kim, Fight for my way, Hwarang (and soon to be part of the MCU!)

Female lead: One of the most original Kdrama female characters I’ve seen. Plus she retains her agency all the way through, which is (unfortunately) not always the case with these shows.

6. Healer

The lives, and pasts, of a hot shot reporter, a spunky young tabloid journalist and a mysterious thief-for-hire intersect.

I ADORE this show and its so rewatchable. The plot was tight and engaging, and this is one of the few shows I’ve watched where there didn’t seem to be a lot of filler. The central 3 characters are great, and the romance was amazing. I especially loved that the male lead started off such a brooding loner, but he became super-affectionate as soon as he admitted his feelings. So many good hugs and lots of face-cradling in this one. There’s also a great riff on the Superman/Clark Kent dynamic which was fun!

Male lead: Effortlessly beats up 2 henchmen while comforting his girl over the phone. What more do you need? AASI: The K2, Suspicious Partner, Melting me softly, Backstreet Rookie, Lovestruck in the City

Female lead: She doesn’t let her vulnerabilities stop her from getting the story or being with the man she loves. AASI: What’s wrong with secretary Kim, I’ll go to you when the weather is nice, Her private life

7. While you were sleeping

Not to be confused with the Sandra Bullock rom-com from the 90s. Instead, this is about a young woman who can dream the future, who has her fate changed by a young prosecutor who suddenly develops the same ability

I was thoroughly and utterly charmed by this show. Everything was so beautifully done - from the cinematography, to the music (OMG the music!), even the title cards were interesting and quirky. The characters were all great - the main leads are so sweet and relatable, the second lead is cute-as-a-button, the villain is properly hissable, and none of the supporting characters/extras annoyed me! The storyline itself was brilliant, with so many great set-ups, pay-offs and twists, and the romance was lovely.

Male lead: A bit of a hot mess of a human being (basically, the polar opposite of his character in W!)…but all the more loveable for it. AASI: W: 2 worlds, Doctor stranger.

Female lead: Smart, sweet, loyal (I really loved her relationship with her mum) and quietly brave.

8. Descendants of the Sun

A special forces Captain meets a capable and beautiful trauma surgeon. They feel an instant bond, but their jobs and philosophy on life get in the way, threatening to tear them apart.

I absolutely LOVE the male lead character, and the romance in this was beautiful (as was the bromance!). Plus its chock-full of CompetencePorn, with lots of scenes of people being really, really good at their jobs (this is one of my favourite things!). However, it didn’t quite nail the angst, and the last minute was a bit twee which dropped it down the rankings a bit.

Male lead: A cocky, charming, absolute BADASS with the most adorable, cheeky smile. AASI: Vincenzo

Female lead: Sweet and a bit out of her depth in the dangerous situations…but put her in charge of a patient and watch her go!

9. What’s Wrong with Secretary Kim

A personal assistant decides to quits her job in order to get a life. Her boss has other ideas.

This was my first Park Seo Joon drama, and he’s great in it. He somehow turns a self-centred, entitled and vain boss into an endearing character! The central romance is amazing - I can rewatch their scenes again and again - and its a bit more mature than some of the others on this list (be sure to check out the extended scene!!). It has some of the best kisses in Kdrama.

Male lead: Like I said, somehow makes vanity and narcissism endearing. Also not afraid to get his shirt off and flash his 6-pack. Bonus. AASI: Itaewon Class, Fight for my way, Hwarang

Female lead: I’m a sucker for uber-competent people so I loved this character. Park Min Young has become one of my favourites, and she is STUNNING in this. AASI: I’ll go to you when the weather is nice, Healer, Her private life

10. Alchemy of Souls - NEW ENTRY

In a world of magic and soul-shifting, a powerful female assassin agrees to be Master to a young, irreverent mage.

Wow. This was fantasy drama done realllllllly well. The world-building was excellent (you easily come to understand the rules and limitations of the sorcery used) and the effects and imagery were great. The love story at the heart is wonderful - it helps casting Lee Jae-wook who is effortlessly cheeky and charming, but when he flexes his power, he looks ultra-cool. There are more episodes coming in December (Thank God! The ending of S1 nearly broke me!) so I’ll have to see if they stick the landing.

Male lead: His laidback, irreverant facade hides a deep hurt, and a powerful, righteous soul. I love him. AASI: Extraordinary you (seond lead), Do Do Sol Sol La La Sol, When the Weather is Nice (supporting character)

Female lead: I love her too! She’s stern and uncompromising, but when she finally opens her heart and learns to love, you just want all the good things for her. AASI: Because This is My First Life

11. Flower of Evil - NEW ENTRY

A police detective starts to suspect her loving husband may be a killer.

This was a fantastic character study, mystery and exploration of a relationship. The suspense almost killed me at times! I’m usually more of a fan about stories that take place at the beginning of a relationship rather than 14 years in, but I became so invested in them as a family. The choral music is a bit overwrought at times, but that’s one of my only complaints. I could never have imagined where they took things in the last episode but it was really good and an interesting way to further explore the character (I thought it would be cheesy, but it was so well done). Plus the most adorable little girl EVER stars in this.

Male lead: His struggles to desperately keep his family together (even though he didn’t fully understand the feelings they inspired in him) was heartbreaking - he is soooo good in this. AASI: Lawless Lawyer, Scarlet Heart

Female lead: Competent and compassionate. You’re heart aches for her when her world starts to fall apart.

12. Love in the Moonlight / Moonlight Drawn by Clouds

A young woman poses as a eunuch in the Royal Palace and falls in love with the Crown Prince

This was the first period piece I watched and it’s still one of my favourites - almost entirely because of the male lead and his beautiful face! The start had a really light, comedic tone (and a lot of modern anachronisms - high fives everywhere!) and I loved all the identity-concealing hi-jinks. But then the romance kicked into gear and the DELICIOUS angst started flowing, and I became obsessed with it. It’s like loads of bits of my favourite regency historical romances were mashed up and transported to the Joseon Dynasty. I loved it so much!

Male lead: Manages to look amazingly handsome despite all the period headgear, kicks ass with a sword, and doesn’t allow himself to be manipulated by the corrupt officials surrounding him. Also acts like an adorable goofball when he’s in love.

Female lead: Loved her at the start - she’s scrappy and independent and capable. Unfortunately, becomes too much of a plot device by the end. AASI: Backstreet Rookie

13. I’ll Go to You When the Weather is Nice / I’ll Find You on a Beautiful Day

A cellist disillusioned with life in Seoul returns to her small home town for the winter.

This was achingly sweet and wonderful. The slow unfolding of the story, the beautiful scenery, and the simple yet moving score all combine to make this feel like the type of small town contemporary romance novel I love to read on a rainy day in front of a fire. Whilst long-held, painful secrets are eventually revealed, there is no massive conflict involved, with no antagonist or over-wrought external drama. Its just the tale of two sad, lonely people who have withdrawn from the world forming a connection with each other and trying to overcome their issues (she has a fear of abandonment; he’s a loner who has a tendency to disappear). As a bonus, there’s a bookclub with a wonderful cast of secondary characters - I wanted to spend more time with all of them.

Male Lead: Precious Cinnamon Roll, to be protected at all costs. AASI: Are you human too

Female lead: Wears her heart on her sleeve. Refreshingly, she’s the instigator of the relationship and isn’t the usual passive, coy female. AASI: What’s wrong with secretary Kim, Healer, Her private life

14. Goblin

A 900yr old immortal guardian finally meets the ‘bride’ who will end his existence

Once I got over the slight ick-factor of the age difference between the two characters at the beginning, I really fell for this show and it’s world. It had me in floods of tears at some points, and it was laugh out loud funny at others. I especially loved the secondary character of the Grim Reaper and his reluctant bromance with the Goblin.

Male lead: Surprising innocent and funny for a 900 year old

Female lead: Also innocent, but in some ways wise beyond her years. Her tears will make you cry (the actress is very good at sobbing her heart out!). AASI: The King, eternal monarch

15. Legend of the Blue Sea

A mermaid comes onto land to find the man she loves

The (literal) fish-out-of-water scenes in the first half of this show were hilarious - the actress is a comic genius! The romance was nicely done, and there wasn’t a lot of extraneous plot or too many characters. It also nicely incorporates scenes from the Joseon era, so you get a partial historical romance thrown in for free!

I couldn’t stop watching this one and I’ve since rewatched it too! Definitely one to check out.

Male lead: Cocky, arrogant conman with a soft mushy centre. AASI: The King, Eternal monarch, Heirs.

Female lead: Steals the show - funny, smart and beautiful. AASI: My love from the Star.

16. Into the Ring/The Ballot

An out-of-work young woman decides to run for office and faces all sorts of challenges in her quest to right some wrongs and earn a living.

This show has one of my favourite ever female characters - she’s headstrong, hard working, and quick to violence but so cute and charming with the most adorable laugh! She tries to act all cynical (that she’s only in it for the money) but she is actually really caring and kind. I sooo wanted her to succeed against the establishment of corrupt assholes that she worked with. Seeing her become disillusioned with politics and her colleagues was heartbreaking, and watching her fight back was great.

Her dynamic with the male lead was also great - he’s quietly in awe of her even when he’s exasperated and borderline scared of her. And he’s super supportive. It was so much fun watching her drag him out of his monotonous, dull life. They also weren’t stingy with the PDA which was so refreshing.

On a superficial level, the show was also visually interesting, with loads of cool angles and blue lens flare. And the overall light, funny tone made it so watchable.

Male lead: Adorkable

Female lead: The literal embodiment of sunshine and determination. I have a bit of a crush on her!

17. The King: Eternal Monarch

The reigning King of the Kingdom of Corea discovers a gateway to a parallel world - the Republic of Korea

This is the first drama I’ve watched in ‘real time’ but I think it would work better as a binge - there are a LOT of characters, and many have dopplegangers (because of the parallel world thing) so it became hard to keep track of who was who. I also think the progression of the romance is better appreciated in a binge (I wrote about it here - ignore the speculation; i got it so wrong LOL!). Unfortunately, the plot also had major holes in it (the ‘rules’ for the gateway/magical flute didn’t make sense) and It was difficult at times to differentiate Corea from Korea - a major failing of the editing.

Buuuuuut, it still made my ‘Great’ list because all of those issues were outweighed by the sheer epicness of this show. The gorgeous sets, the dramatic scenery, the ANGST-filled, beautiful romance…at one point the King rides a majestic white horse into battle with a sword on a neon-lit highway to save the woman he loves. I mean, come on! Plus, its really funny - the ‘fish out of water’ scenes when the King first arrives in Korea, the chalk and cheese dopplegangers Yeong and Eun-Seob, the King’s constant threats of beheading…I loved those elements so much!

Male lead: Gives Ri Jeong-Hyeok from CHOY a run for his money in the ‘Best Boyfriend’ competition. AASI: Legend of the blue sea, Heirs.

Female lead: A bad-ass cop. Takes a while to believe Lee Gon’s story, but once she decides to go all in…she goes all in, and loves unreservedly with her whole heart. AASI: Goblin

18. Tomorrow with you

A time-traveller struggling to live in the present meets a woman trying to let go of her past.

This reminded me a bit of ‘I’ll go to you when the weather is nice’ in terms of the melancholic tone, the simple but effective music, and the beautiful lighting etc. There were also some really interesting, innovative shots which I appreciated.

It took a few episodes to get into and it was a bit frustrating in the middle - so much could have been solved if people just TALKED to each other!! Plus the rules for this version of time travel weren’t really clear…But the last few episodes were brilliant; the way the story came together, and all the little bits of set up were paid off was really well done. These episodes alone were enough to bump this up to the ‘Great’ category (especially, given there was a bit of a Lake House vibe at one point - I’m a sucker for that movie). The romance was also beautifully portrayed; I could endlessly watch their domestic scenes - they had such good chemistry and banter.

Male lead: Absolutely, but endearingly, terrible at relationships. He ends up falling in love against his will and largely without realising it.

Female lead: A bit of a mess and a borderline alcoholic, but so cute and innocent. I love the way she talks to herself, she’s so funny! AASI: Oh My Venus

19. Fight for my Way

Two life-long friends decide to go after their dreams

I fast-forwarded large chunks of this (I wasn’t interested in the secondary couple at all), but it still made my ‘Great’ list because this is one of the best friends-to-lovers stories I’ve seen. You truly buy that these 2 have known each other their entire lives (their bickering and teasing feels so natural). And then when they take the next step, they’re so affectionate and refreshingly open with their feelings. Speaking of which, this also has some great kissing scenes (Park Seo Joon is the master!)

Male lead: I love his contradictions. He’s goofy and childish…but can really turn on the sexy charm; he’s a badass MMA fighter…who loves when his girlfriend sticks up for him and protects him. AASI: What’s wrong with secretary Kim, Itaewon class, Hwarang

Female lead: Takes no shit from anyone and will fight for her man! AASI: Descendants of the sun (secondary character)

20. Vincenzo - NEW ENTRY

A Korean man raised in the Italian mafia to be a mob lawyer returns to Seoul with some ulterior motives.

This has the strange tone typical of Kdramas - one minute its a goofy comedy, the next some truly dark violence is going down - and it pulls it off really well. The cast is all great, it was a unique story, and the male lead was charismatic as always. The story is not romance heavy - its got more of a found family vibe - but I still enjoyed it. It dragged a bit in the latter half, but that half contained some genuinely great moments. This is also the only kdrama my aunt and uncle have ever watched and they became obsessed with it.

Male lead: Slick, dangerous and charming, with a heart of gold that he tries REALLY hard to hide. AASI: Descendents of the sun.

Female lead: Loud and ballsy with some questionable ethics - so not the typical Kdrama female! She was great.

21. Suspicious Partner

A young, hardworking lawyer has her life turned upside down when she is put on trial for murder.

This was officially bumped up the list a while ago, and I stand by the decision. Its still overly long, but the serial killer plot had some nice twists and it was central to the story, so it didn’t feel extraneous like some of these types of plots do. Mainly, I just loved the central romance - the 2 characters sparked off each other so well and I loved their evolution from sort-of enemies to lovers. This is another show where I can endlessly rewatch their scenes together.

Male lead: Its Ji Chang Wook! He’s so good at playing serious guys who are secretly big dorks. AASI: Healer, The K2, Melting me softly, Backstreet Rookie, Lovestruck in the City

Female lead: Fate deals her a shitty hand, but she perseveres with grace and determination. She’s great. AASI: Shopaholic Louis, 100 days my prince.

The GOOD (in no particular order)

Lovestruck in the city - NEW ENTRY

A documentary-style tale of different couples in Seoul

I loved the premise of this, and, unsually, I was just as invested in the secondary relationships as the main pair (they even introduced a final couple in the final episode and had me rooting for them - which is a testament to the good casting and chemistry). I have to admit I went off Chi Chang-wook after Backstreet Rookie (I loathed that show so much!) but he won me back here. Jae Won is such a charming mess!

Bring it on Ghost - NEW ENTRY

A man who can see ghosts starts working with one

I officially became an Ok Taecyeon fan after this - he’s adorable. The show is fun and rolicks along at a good pace. The central romance is really sweet with lovely angsty moments. Would definitely recommend.

I Am Not a Robot

A man who is allergic to human contact finds companionship with a robot…or does he?

I honestly thought I wouldn’t make it passed a couple of episodes of this - the concept was just too ridiculous. But I’m glad I persevered, because it developed some real depth and some proper good angst towards the end and I LOVED the central relationship. I’ve rewatched loads of this one.

I Remember You

A famous criminal profiler gatecrashes the investigation of a serial killer, hoping it will restore the missing memories of his childhood trauma

I really liked the set up of this - the lead character is introduced like a young Sherlock Holmes (the music even reminded me of the score for the BBC Sherlock series). The super-observant, socially awkward thing kind of dropped off as the series progressed, but I still enjoyed how the plot developed, especially with Park Bo-Gum’s character; I’ve only ever seen him play innocent cutie-pies, so this role was a bit of a surprise!

The female lead was like an anime character come to life (she was petite and cute with enormous eyes), but I also loved her personality; she was tenacious, and dogged and took no shit from anyone. She had a cute, antagonistic relationship with the profiler at the start (which I loved) which eventually led to some really sweet, touching moments.

Hotel del Luna

A hotel for wandering spirits gets a new human manager - and he forms a surprising connection to the enigmatic 1300 year old owner

If I had to describe this show in one word it would be ’lavish’. It’s a feast for the eyes - from the set design, to the costumes, to the CGI views of the hotel towering over the moon-lit Seoul cityscape, its stunning. It also plays with aspect ratios in a cool way (watch for the shots where the action spills over into the black bars top and bottom of the screen).

In terms of the characters, I really liked IU in this; her character may be uncaring, world-weary, and money-hungry, but she’s also immensely charming. I admit I got more platonic vibes with her and the male lead, but I still liked their relationship. I also really liked the stories of the ghosts passing through (some reduced me to tears with very little screen time) and there were a couple of GREAT cameos. Especially the one at the very end - I want more of him, please!!

My Holo Love

A lonely woman falls for a holographic AI and then meets his creator…

I love the concept of this show (I’m a big sci-fi nerd), and I think this stayed in my ‘favourite’ list for so long because it was the first Kdrama of this genre that I saw. I still love it - especially because of how beautifully it’s shot, and how well the story comes together - but I’m not dying to rewatch any of it, unlike all the others shows that are now on the ‘great’ list.

Extraordinary You

A high school student discovers she’s a supporting character in a comic book

The plot of this was so cool, and the way the comic story played out interspersed with the characters ‘real lives’ was really well done. Plus the central couple were so adorable. It dragged in the middle section (several versions of the same conversations were had, and the same exposition was spelled out multiple ways for no apparent reason) which kept it out of my favourite list, but it redeemed itself with some good angst at the end, and it had a really lovely ‘epilogue’.

Just Between Lovers

Three people impacted by a tragic shopping mall collapse start working on a building project together, unaware of their shared past.

I absolutely adore the male lead in this - he is the archetypal tortured hero (I constantly wanted to give him a hug and a warm meal). He’s also wonderfully romantic in his own, straightfoward, no-nonsense way. The female lead was really likeable - l love capable women and she is the definition of that (she even drives a lorry at one point!). There’s a lot of pain and angst in this show, with very little levity, but it strangely never felt heavy. I really liked it.

Strong Girl Bong-Soon

A woman with inherited super-strength gets a job as a bodyguard for an eccentric young CEO

The lead couple in this are AD-OR-ABLE and I loved their relationship. But there was a weird tone issue in this show. The romance is super cute…but there’s a whole dark sub plot involving multiple women being held captive by a psychopath, and a really grating cast of ‘bad guy’ extras. I ended up fast forwarding most of that, and just concentrated on the romance - If someone could do a supercut of all their scenes, I would watch it on a loop.

30 but 17/Still 17

A 17 year old girl gets into an accident and wakes from a coma 13 years later.

I was worried going into this that the romance (between a 30 year old man and (essentially) a 17 year old girl) would feel icky and uncomfortable. But the writers made the wise choice of creating a 30 year old man with the emotional maturity of a 17 year old. He is so awkward and unworldly, that they actually work really well together. In fact, I loved their relationship. The secrets in this show took faaaar too long to be revealed, which made me worried that the eding would be too rushed, but there was actually time for a nice ‘epilogue’. Plus, all the supporting characters were great (including the wonderfully weird housekeeper Jennifer) and the cutest dog in the world was in this. So I definitely recommend it.

Hometown cha cha cha - NEW ENTRY

A big city dentist opens a practice in a seaside town and clashes with the local jack-of-all-trades.

This hooked me and made me look forward to the weekends even more so I could get my fix. The story is slight (slice-of-life type thing) but the characters had me engaged and it was an enemies - friends - lovers story which is my catnip.

The male lead was such an intriguing character and the female lead has charm in spades. The romantic scenes bordered on far too cheesy but you can understood why (this was basically their first relationship) so I let it slide. Lovely cast of supporting characters.

Nevertheless - NEW ENTRY

Two art students embark on a friends-with-benefits relationship.

I binged this in one weekend. It reminded me of the slightly trashy YA romances that are my gulity pleasure - where the innocent girl falls for the college Fuckboy. You know she shouldn’t end up with him, but you can’t resist their chemistry. The male lead’s character remained a mystery even by the end of the show, and he really only started to show any semblance of feelings in the last episode, which was a let down. He was so underdeveloped which was a shame, because this show really captured my attention otherwise - in large part because I’m not used to this storyline in Kdramas. There is lots of sex! Actual removal of clothes occurs (and there’s a lovely montage of the main couple sharing a bed which was a visual highlight). So overall I enjoyed it - not least for the side romances - every one of which worked for me (which is unusual).

Da-Li and the Cocky Prince - NEW ENTRY

A down-on-her luck art curator teams up with a noveau rich ex-thug to save her father’s art museum.

This is the poor girl meets arrogant rich guy trope - but with a twist. She used to be rich and he used to be poor. This leads to a great dynamic between them. His character on paper (an uncultured money-obssessed ex-thug who has a great head for business) is elevated so much by the charm of the actor - you really root for him and his attempts to fit in to this new world. Would recommend!

Mystic Pop-up Bar

As punishment for past sins, a woman must solve the grudges of 100,000 people by entering their dreams

This was an unexpected delight. I started watching it after spotting a cute gifset on tumblr (which I didn’t realise contained huge spoilers!). The story and tone is (mostly) light and quirky, and I particularly enjoyed the worldbuilding - the banal bureaucracy of the afterlife in this even reminds me a bit of The Good Place. I’m a sucker for a ‘found family’ theme and this one was done really nicely. It also had 2 main ships - one really cute and innocent, the other took me by surprise with how moving it was. Similarly, some of the episode-specific stories and characters (i.e. the individual grudges) made me tear up.

100 days my prince

A Prince loses his memory during an assassination attempt and ends up living as a peasant for 100 days.

Another period piece; the plots of these seem a little repetitive (Crown prince’s life is threatened by scheming Minister) but the central cast and the romance usually makes up for it. Same for this show - I really enjoyed watching the spoiled, grumpy puppy of a Prince try to cope with manual labour, and the female lead was capable, and endearing.

True beauty - NEW ENTRY

Starting at a new school, a bullied ‘ugly’ girl reinvents herself with the help of makeup

This was really cute! I love Cha Eun-woo in anything and whilst this was similar in theme to one of his other shows (Gangnam beauty) I still enjoyed it on its own merits. He is so cute and charming and his dynamic with the female lead carried the show. The second lead also grew on me, but I wish they hadn’t dragged out the love triangle quite so much.

Weightlifting Fairy Kim Bok-Joo

A young talented weightlifter experiences first love

Honestly, I wasn’t sold on this at first; the female lead was a bit much (lot of gurning and over-acting) and there was a weird disconnect between how she was described (big, overweight, manly, unfeminine) and how she actually looked (thin and beautiful!). But the back half of this show saved it; her relationship with Joon-Hyung was sooooo cute. He is adorable, and they were both so supportive of each other’s dreams. I finished this with a big smile on my face.

Are You Human Too

A mother separated from her son builds a robotic replacement. Decades later, he has to take the place of the ‘real’ son.

I loved the evolution of the robot in this - it never went the way of a full Pinnochio story, but it was fun to see him learning about the real world and how humans interact. It also posed some interesting questions - what does it mean to be human? And how would you react if you were ‘replaced’ by an artificial version?

The actor in this was fantastic. The way he could change from the real Nam Shin to Nam Shin III with the most subtle shifts in posture and facial expression was really impressive. It took me longer to warm to the female lead, and by the end she was given very little to do…but her unflinching support and unconditional love for Nam Shin III won me over. Some of the supporting characters didn’t work for me, and it was far too long…but worth a watch for the lead actor’s performance. Plus, Nam Shin III is an absolute cutie-pie.

Shopaholic Louis/ Shopping King Louis

The young, shopaholic heir to a large department store empire loses his memory and has to live as a poor man

The male lead in this is an absolute puppy dog and I ADORE him. He squeals when he sees bugs, he can’t run to save his life, and he’s the type of guy who will punch someone and immediately apologise and ask if they’re ok. He’s spoilt, entitled, demanding and has no concept of the value of money…but thanks to the actor portraying him, he just comes across as innocent, sweet and lonely (he spends all his time shopping and accumulating stuff because they fills up his empty life). The female lead is just a really nice, kind person; at first Louis seems like he’ll be just one more burden she needs to take care of, but he makes it clear from the start that she can count on him to help her too - something she’s never had before. Their relationship develops so naturally and thoroughly that you cant help but feel they are perfect for each other. I watched this with a big smile on my face.

Oh My Venus

The previously much-lusted after ‘Venus of Daegu’ fulfilled her dream of becoming a lawyer - but she gained weight and lost her self esteem in the process.

I adored the female lead - she was so relentlessly bright and optimistic that you couldn’t help but love her and root for her. I was a bit worried going in that there was going to be a lot of fat-shaming, but the male lead made it clear that he was more interested in her internal health than her external appearance (and you could tell he started to fall for her when she was chubby, so it wasn’t superficial in that way). I wasn’t expecting for him to become so much of the focus in the second half of the show (I thought he was just going to be a hunky trainer; I should have known better - in a Kdrama there is always a Tragic Backstory looming!). Their relationship was so natural and cute - the bit with the dimples never got old - and overall, this was a fun, easy watch.

A Piece of your Mind

A classical music recording engineer meets an AI designer.

I struggled to sum-up the concept of this in one sentence, because the ‘plot’ is so arbitrary (and the AI stuff makes no sense whatsoever!). It’s really more of a mood piece - the lighting, the music and the performance combine to make this a strangely ethereal show, dealing with unrequited love, grief and the importance of human connection. It’s slow and contemplative and a little odd in its structure (there’s very little set-up, so you feel like you’ve been dropped into episode 3 of an established show). This may put some people off, but I really liked it.

I started watching it because of the leads (who I’ve loved in other shows) and they didn’t disappoint. She is so kind and lovely; he’s a little odd - like a robot learning about life. But their relationship is so beautiful (it even included one of my favourite niche tropes: insomniacs who can only sleep around each other).

Apparently the episode run was cut down from 16 to 12 because of poor ratings, which is a real shame because i think a bit more time was needed to really sell the female lead’s emotional arc. It all felt a little rushed at the end, but I still enjoyed it, and admired that it tried something a little unconventional.

Rookie Historian

An independent, educated woman choses to become one of the first female court historians, rather than get married.

This show had a really interesting premise and I enjoyed watching the rookie female historians navigate court-life (battling workplace harassment, misogyny and patriarchal values) and developing a real friendship with each other.

The female lead was fantastic - she was headstrong, pragmatic, unapologetically intelligent, a lover of books and a hater of injustice. She shared that love of books with the male lead, who was sensitive, soft-spoken, and innocent. The ultimate beta hero, who’s romantic fantasies involved him feeding her cookies and fanning her while she sleeps!

Their romance took a backseat for a lot of the show, but I didn’t mind as the plot was exploring interesting topics such as intruders from the West, catholicism, and censorship, etc.

Tempted/The Great Seducer

In an act of revenge, a wealthy heir makes a bet with his friends to seduce a hardworking female college student

10 minutes into this I started to get major Cruel Intentions vibes…which made sense when I found out it was also an adaptation of Dangerous Liaisons! It doesn’t have the dark edge or overt sexuality of Cruel Intentions (which is one of my favs) but its still good - mainly due to the male lead. I ADORED him in TKEM and he’s really good here. I’m a sucker for the ‘bad boy falls in love for the first time’ trope and he played it so well. The female lead was also good - she was self-aware, strong, intelligent and took no shit. I was less interested by the love affairs of the adults around them, but overall it was a good show.

The OK

My shy boss / Introverted boss

An extroverted actress takes a job at a PR company working for a man with crippling shyness

This was another deceptive show; I thought from the title and the synopsis that it would just be a light opposites attract comedy about an introverted man and an extroverted woman. But I was almost in tears by the second episode when the Tragic Backstory came to light, and we saw the full extent of the Boss’ struggles to communicate with other human beings. He has such a rich, funny, and smart inner monologue, and the way he overthinks every interaction is really endearing…which makes the contrast with his silent and withdrawn external persona all the more stark and heartbreaking. You really root for him to find happiness. This was overly long (a common pitfall with these shows) and there was some distracting shaky camera work in some of the close ups. There were also implications early on about workplace sexual harassment and possibly dubious consent in a one night stand which were dropped, leaving a bit of a sour note. Despite that, it was overall fairly enjoyable and has one of the cutest confession scenes!

The OK

Because this is my First Life

A rational-to-a-fault software designer and an aspiring screenwriter come up with an unconventional way to solve their housing problem

When I started this, I thought it was going to be all light and fluffy (the main character’s job in the beginning was to insert the product placement in Korean dramas - hello, Red Ginseng! - which I found hilarious and meta) but it had a surprisingly melancholic tone throughout and touched on issues of workplace harassment and gender roles. I didn’t warm to the male lead until right at the end (which was probably partly intentional - he’s very remote and closed off) but overall I found the story quite lovely. Plus it had a really great central female friendship and their conversations actually passed the Bechdel test!

My Love from the Star

Alien stranded on earth meets an actress soon before he’s due to be rescued.

It took a couple of goes to get into this one, but I’m glad I finally watched the whole thing (the female lead was initially very irritating, but she improved a lot). I enjoyed the present-day romance and all the flashes back to the past. However, the ending was really abrupt and disappointing (which kept it out of my favourite list). There should have been 1 less filler episode in the middle, and a decent, fleshed out finale instead.

The K2

An ex-mercenary takes a job as a bodyguard protecting the illegitimate daughter of a politician. A sort-of Snow White retelling.

This started off really well; there are some amazing fight sequences (hello, shower room scene!) and JCW has never been hotter - its worth watching for him alone. However, the back half became really bogged down in double crosses and manipulations, and it focussed too much on the politicians. The writers did well to give these characters some layers, but they were all essentially doing bad things for the wrong reasons, and I just didn’t care about them. The show was much better when it was following K2’s journey. The romance also started off well, but was a bit underdeveloped (mainly because they barely interacted).

Dol Dol Sol Sol La La Sol - NEW ENTRY

A sheltered, spoilt rich girl falls on hard times and is helped by a young man hiding a big secret.

I loved the bright, colourful, easy tone of this and the underlying story (which reminded me of Shopping King Louis). It has an equally innocent and charming lead who (on paper) should have been annoying and entitled. However, the twist after episode 4 (i think) really threw me and I wasn’t sure I could continue it. But I did.… only to encounter a ridiculous ending which somewhat soured me on the whole show. Watch if you’re a big fan of the central leads but be prepared to throw things at your TV.

Great Shaman Go Doo Shim - NEW ENTRY

A high school girl from a long line of Shamans reluctantly enters the family business to rid her new school of an evil spirit.

I watched this for the male lead - he’s played the younger version of so many of my favourite characters so I’ve been looking forward to his debut as a lead. He had really sweet chemistry with the female lead, who I’m also eager to see in other things. Overall, this show was short and slight, but cute.

So I Married the Antifan - NEW ENTRY

An idol and a reporter star in a reality series where they pretend to be together.

I liked the bickering between the main couple at the start of this (who doesn’t love a good enemies-to-lovers trope!) and the show had a good set up…but it ran out of steam a bit. The female lead became far too passive which started to get on my nerve. And the second couple were sooo annoying. Overall - a good central romance, but I probably won’t be rewatching this.

He is psychometric - NEW ENTRY

A man with the gift of psychometry teams up with a police officer to solve an old crime

I loved the set up of this and the male lead is really likeable. But I wasn’t a fan of the big plot reveal towards the end - not because it wasn’t well executed, but because of how it impacted the characters. It spoiled a bit of my enjoyment.

Bride of Habaek / Bride of the Water God

A God of the Land of Water visits the human realm to fulfil a task before ascending to his throne. He enlists the help of a ‘divine servant’, a down-on-her-luck psychiatrist.

I started this because I liked the lead actor. His baby-face can’t quite pull off the intensity needed for this role, but he was still cute as the arrogant, imperious God brought low by his circumstances - no money, house, powers or (most importantly to him) driving license. I also liked the female lead - she so desperately wanted to hide her kind, compassionate heart from a world that had battered and bruised her. There were some good individual scenes (especially the ‘confession’ moment, which was just lovely), but the show ran out of steam towards the end, and ultimately felt like a waste of potential.

Her Private Life

A talented art curator tries to keep her professional persona separate from her fangirl obsession with a pop idol.

This was cute and I loved the central relationship - he was so supportive of her, and their interactions were refreshingly mature and their banter felt really natural. Ultimately, it was a bit forgettable (I’m not dying to rewatch any of it), and the last minute tacked-on childhood trauma subplot was really unnecessary.

Touch Your Heart

Star actress rocked by scandal works at a law firm to prepare for her comeback role

This starred the secondary couple from Goblin and I really like them, even though they are playing very different characters in this (more opposites attract, than doomed lovers). It’s a bit too ‘cutesy’ and I had to fast forward a lot of the secondary romances which I wasn’t invested in.

My Secret Terrius

A secret agent on the run gets embroiled in the life of his next door neighbour - a mum of young twins.

The romance in this was underwhelming; the two characters ended in a really cute place, but it felt like set up for a story I probably would have liked more than this one. In saying that, this was still a relatively enjoyable watch; the female lead was great - she was constantly underestimated as ‘just a housewife’ but she was smarter, and more determined and resourceful than the spies around her. The male lead’s interactions with the twins were adorable, and there was a good cast of supporting characters. However, I’ve already pretty much forgotten the main espionage plot!

Where stars land - NEW ENTRY

A man who dreamed of being a pilot ends up working at the airport - and he hides an unusual secret.

I like the two main actors in this, which is the reason I started watching it. But (confession) I didn’t make any notes as I was watching the show and a year later I can’t remember a single thing that happened. I do recall that it was solidly made and I enjoyed watching it at the time…but it was obviously pretty forgettable!

Abyss - NEW ENTRY

Two friends are dragged into a plot surrounding a mysterious device - the Abyss.

This was a fun ride but ultimately a bit forgettable. The central conceit (you come back to life in a body that better reflects your soulI) was different and fun and the two leads getting used to their change in fortunes was amusing. They ultimately made a cute couple, but (as usual) I was less interested in the murder subplot.

Come and Hug Me - NEW ENTRY

A stoic policeman and a budding young actress share a past trauma

I liked the central relationship in this one (although the actor needed to blink more - it was so disconcerting!). But the father was a one-note hissable villain and the story was overly long and slooooow. Not one of my favs.

Strongest delivery man - NEW ENTRY

A delivery man who dreams of a better life.

I like an underdog story, so I had fun watching this. I also appreciated how the second lead could have been a typical villain but they made him so sympathetic and pitifiul (plus he was played by one of my new favs - Kim Seon-ho - so I was rooting for him to be a better man).

Business Proposal - NEW ENTRY

A case of mistaken identity leads to hijinks between a cold, aloof CEO and one of his employees

This was fun and passed the time, but was fairly slight. The male lead felt like a lesser-version of Park Seo-Joon from What’s Wrong with Secretary Kim? That show dealt with the story a cold, aloof businessman dealing with childhood trauma much better. But the female lead in this was a delight.

Lawless Lawyer

A gangster-turned-lawyer moves to Gisung to take on corruption with the help of a suspended female attorney

I liked this more at the beginning; it reminded me a bit of Itaewon Class, with a charismatic lead, an intricately plotted revenge scheme that the audience only becomes aware of as the series progresses, and a take-no-shit female lead who was introduced hitting an authority figure! However, it never really gripped me (it took me weeks to finish) and a couple of the villains were overacting and hamming it up all over the place. But I loved the two leads, and their relationship was good, despite feeling a bit rushed.

1% of Something

To gain his inheritance, an arrogant, aloof CEO has to enter into a marriage contract with a sweet primary school teacher.

I liked how streamlined this was: it was just a show about two people who fall in love despite their best intentions. There was no overly complicated plot, and even the conflict that keeps them apart towards the end felt very organic and unforced.

She is a delightful ball of sunshine. He is a little overbearing but has his own charm. And bear with the bad haircut and appalling fashion sense - he improves at the end!

Melting Me Softly

Two people are accidentally cryogenically frozen for 20 years. They have to navigate the modern world and their new lives together.

Another good concept, but it ultimately descended into little more than a light work-place romance. Had a couple of good kissing scenes, but it was overall a bit forgettable.

My Sassy Girl

A 'sassy’ princess meets an ambitious scholar in less than ideal circumstances…

I enjoyed the fact that this Joseon period drama focused on a Princess for a change, and not a prince. She came across as more 'obnoxious and immature’ than 'sassy’ in the beginning, but once it was made clear that she was actually a decent, kind person underneath, I soon warmed to her. I also liked the relationship with the male lead, which amounted to a pretty good enemies-to-lovers story. It took a bit of an unexpected turn right at the end, but my independent, feminine self was good with it. Overall, this was a pretty easy watch, but nothing special.

Hwarang

Follows a peasant who joins the newly-created Hwarang (Poet Warrior Youths in ancient Korea) to enact revenge for the death of his best friend

I enjoyed the scenes of the Hwarang hanging out and bonding - so many cute bromances in this! But I couldn’t really connect with the central story and romance, due to a major case of SLS (Second Lead Syndrome) - as much as I’m a fan of Park Seo-joon, I adore Park Hyung-sik, and I found his character, journey and relationship with the female lead much more compelling. The ending still managed to feel somewhat satisfying, but I won’t be rewatching any of it.

The BAD

Hyde, Jekyll and Me

A woman becomes involved in the lives of 2 men, who share one body

Hyun Bin is sooo watchable in this, especially as the slick-haired, glasses-wearing, uptight Seo-Jin. And the show started well…but quickly went off the rails into a convoluted, dragged-out revenge plot. It was a bit of a slog to get through, to be honest.

Queen: Love and War

The long lost twin of a recently assassinated Queen assumes her identity to enter the Bridal selection to wed the resurrected King and seek revenge.

This was a bit of a mess (as you can tell from that synopsis!); it felt like the first few episodes were rushed through as a sort of ‘prologue’ before the main thrust of the story…but that prologue contained A LOT of plot with some major character revelations that were rapidly skimmed over (e.g. the female lead was introduced as having complete amnesia; but almost out of nowhere she casually mentions that she got all her memories back and now knows who she is). Because of this, it took me a while to get a sense of who the characters really were. A lot of the usual Joseon plot points played out (scheming ministers and untrustworthy queens) but it had some unique features - I especially enjoyed the bridal selection scenes and seeing the lead female outwitting her rivals in the various challenges. But ultimately, I fast forwarded a lot of this and it was pretty forgettable.

Backstreet Rookie

A struggling young woman takes a part-time job at the convenience store run by her high school crush.

I was really not a fan of this show, and probably would have stopped watching if it wasn’t for Kim Yoo-jung. Her character was really likeable - kickass, but vulnerable, and so loving and kind. You were really rooting for her throughout. The show also had some interesting things to say about inequality (there was a lovely scene between the male leads’s parents in episode 10 touching on this theme)…but that’s about it for the positives.

Overall, it was just too OTT and manic and most of the characters were barely more than cartoonish caricatures. One character was actually repulsive, and the fact that he got his own romantic subplot was just gross. I’m a big fan of Ji Chang-wook, but I didn’t like some of his acting choices in this, and his character spent far too long in a relationship with another woman, which meant the main romance felt underdeveloped.

And…it ended without a kiss. I was so pissed off! I put up with 16 episodes of crap, expecting a decent pay-off at the end…but no. I wouldn’t recommend this one.

The UNCLASSIFIABLE

Moon Lovers: Scarlet Heart Ryeo

A modern girl is transported 1000 years into the past where she becomes embroiled in the lives of the Royal Princes.

I honestly don’t know where I stand with this one! Did I love it? Did I hate it? I seriously don’t know!

I was reluctant to start this (I knew it didn’t have a happy ending) but I was told its a rite of passage for KDrama newbies to watch this show. And there were some great things about it - the male lead was amazing! So intense and tragic, with the most arresting face. The music was also GORGEOUS, as was the scenery - the whole production felt very sumptuous. The palace intrigue stuff was also more compelling than most of the other historic dramas I’ve seen. I recognised several of the Princes from other shows, and I became really invested in 3 of them…which made the constant threat of them betraying each other/killing each other AGONISING. This show was heavy on the Emotional Torture Porn, and some of it felt gratuitous, because I just didn’t understand the motivations behind some of the plot points/character’s actions.

I also wasn’t a big fan of the female lead; partly because the actress only seemed to have 2 facial expressions to work with, but partly because and any hints that she was a modern girl with modern sensibilities quickly disappeared. It was this independence and spunk that made all the princes fall for her (to varying degrees) but she lost all of that and it left me wondering why they bothered with the time travel aspect at all.

I finished the show feeling wrung out and with the overwhelming sense of “Why? What was the point of that?”

Buuuuuut…it has lingered with me - as @talenevertold said when we were discussing the show, “Nobody enjoys it in the process… but it leaves this unique bittersweet aftertaste…” and that’s absolutely true; and it probably true that this show IS a rite of passage that everyone should watch. But don’t say I didn’t warn you!

and…The MEH (i.e. DNF):

This list is getting long! I have a bit less patience with shows than I did in the beginning - there are so many to get through, so I’m not willing to waste my time on anything that either doesn’t grip me from a story perspective, is far too slow, has mediocre acting and/or is too soapy

Master’s sun

Tale of Nokdu

The Heirs

Meow, the Secret Boy

Love Alarm

One Spring Night

Suits

Chocolate

Doctor Stranger

The Scholar Who Walks the Night

Oh Master!

Something In the rain

Alice

Live Up to Your Name

Record of Youth

Run on

Oh my Ghost

If I’ve made a heinous mistake by dropping any of these - get in touch and plead the case for why i should give them another chance!

#Kdrama #Kdramas #kdrama rec #Kdrama recommendations

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