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vizthedatum · 5 months

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You know the feeling when version control and git are traumatizing to you because of the random associations you have with your ex??

And it’s really frustrating because you also work in a computational setting???

And it’s like - is there really a moral fucking judgment for having PTSD? (Or *cough* not using version control?)

—

I am reclaiming a lot of stuff more and more all the time though. This weekend, I’m slated to play more games than I have ALL YEAR. (I was also triggered by games)

#reclaiming triggers #ptsd #ptsd trigger #healing #trauma #neurodivergence #prose #version control #git #programming #programming with trauma

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pensarecool2 · 8 months

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That moment when someone points out the long marks on your stomach, and you say it's stretch marks as always because you thought it was stretch marks, but then they continue to point out that it looks like scar tissue, including some streaks that look like a chunk of skin is removed and you realize that its from when your father would zip tie you to supporting poles in the basement and torture you with an old fashioned fire poker heated up by the wood stove

#child abuse #ok to reply #ok to send ask #torture #recovered memories #ptsd trigger #childhood trauma #vent post

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eldritch-queern-magicat · 11 months

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(This is not directed at anyone specific at all, this is a general post about guilt tripping tactics and I just need to vent.)

I do kind of get why at times people say others absolutely really have to share something, because the point they're trying to make is being talked over or just ignored.

But as someone with severe PTSD, due to multiple kinds of trauma, it can quickly turn into nothing but a guilt tripping session.

Because sometimes the way it's said is far too reminiscent of what abusers pull, trying to manipulate you into feeling like a bad person for not just obeying them.

It does sometimes feel like I'm being held at gunpoint where what's at stake is my still-fucking-healing self-esteem.

You're not wrong for being angry people that aren't listening.

But I'm also not wrong for just passing that shit by because it wrecks my mind.

When you add guilting shit to an otherwise really good and super important post, you immediately remind me of fundamentalist Christians.

You know, where everything is simplistic as fuck black-and-white, regardless of what you're saying.

Regardless of how nuanced your take is, it won't matter if you're still trying to force others to share what you said.

Basically, doing that will just hurt people and especially those whose trauma relates to being manipulated.

I'm all for encouraging people to share your really important posts and calling out when people talk over and ignore you, just don't guilt people along the way.

I personally don't think anyone should have to trot out trauma to justify not sharing posts that try to guilt others, but here I am doing just that with myself because I'm actually really angry about it now.

I know I'm not the first to post about this, and I'm entirely certain I won't be the last, but it needs repeated.

By guilting and manipulating others, you're going to hurt more people than you're going to convince.

-Galaco ☄️😺

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inkskinned · 7 months

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hey btw if you're in the USA at 2:20 p.m. ET on Wednesday, Oct. 4, they're testing the emergency broadcast system. your phone is probably going to make a really loud noise, even if it's on silent. there's a backup date on the 11th if they need to postpone it.

if you're not in a safe situation and have an extra phone, you should turn that phone completely off beforehand.

additionally, if you're like me, and are easily startled; i recommend treating it like a party. have a countdown or something. be surrounded by your loved ones. take the actions you personally need to take to make yourself safe.

i have already seen mockery towards any person who feels nervous about this. for the record, it completely, completely valid to have "emergency broadcast sounds" be an anxiety trigger. do not let other people make fun of you for that. emergency sounds are legitimately engineered to make us take action; those of us with high levels of anxiety and/or neurodivergence are already pre-disposed to have a Bad Time. sometimes it is best to acknowledge that the situation will be triggering for some, and to prepare for that; rather than just saying "well that's stupid, it's just a test."

"loud scary sound time" isn't like, my favorite thing, but we can at least try to prevent some additional anxiety by preparing for it. maybe get yourself a cake? noise cancelling headphones? the new hozier album? whatever helps. love u, hope you're okay. we are gonna ride it out together.

#watching ppl go from being like ''support neurodivergent ppl~~!"#to being like ''if this is going to give u a panic attack ur fuckken stupid''#like..... gets me #yeah man. i know im going to be triggered by it . in the old fashioned term. it is GOING to give me a panic attack. it's pretty much certai #and i shouldn't have to tell u about what i have survived for you to be okay with that.#you can just trust that i ALSO don't want me to react to it. i'm not gonna be having a FUN time.#dismissing that bc you think it's stupid.... like is the whole problem.#these sounds are workshopped by entire teams of people to get you to pay attention and move quickly.#they arent meant to be fun and exciting.#OBVIOUSLY it's gonna set ppl off.#but yeah there's something so fuckken demeaning about ppl being like. well that trigger isn't valid bc u haven't undergone X #dude i have ptsd bc i was abused as a child. like plain and simple. the fact im 30 and afraid of the dark tells you how bad it was.#i shouldn't have to ask u for permission to be mentally ill.#the reason it's a fucking disorder and not a fucking choice is that I DO NOT CONTROL IT.#like how is it any different from when ppl are like ''oh public speaking isn't that scary'' like FOR YOU #for YOU this isn't scary. now if i could fucking eat my own amygdala...

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loriache · 23 days

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"I've been waiting for ages for somebody to unmask them."

This moment tends to elicit negative reactions in a first read through, and I've got some opinions about why where Kabru is coming from here actually makes a lot of logical sense. So I thought I'd elaborate on that.

I think people hear this and go, "He thinks they must be hiding something because they gave money to someone? What a cynic." Or "he dislikes them because they did charity?? What's wrong with this guy!". And obviously, a lot, a lot is wrong with him. But I think this makes more sense than it seems at first glance! What people evaluating this judgement miss is why Kabru is paying attention to Laios and co to begin with.

Kabru knows of the Touden siblings because (he's a little bit of a stalker-) he is keeping an eye on all the relevant parties in events developing on the island, in order to be able to guide them to his preferred outcome. This includes adventurers because they are the ones actually exploring the dungeon! He's well aware that something as minor as internal tensions between party members could be key to the historical events that are developing. (He would love the assassination of Archduke Franz Ferdinand.)

His desired outcome is that whatever the rewards are of breaking the dungeon's curse, whether that's kingship or the ancient elven secrets of dungeons, are claimed by:

A) a short lived person

B) Someone who will be a good, effective leader and/or use those secrets and the power they carry wisely, with foresight, and to establish a political bloc for short lived people.

The person he can best trust to do this is, of course, himself. But due to his PTSD regarding dungeons and monsters, he's not able to develop the necessary skills to conquer the dungeon. Once he realises this, he starts looking for someone else who he can support to that end.

But most of the adventurers don't have any intentions of conquering the dungeon, don't have the skills, or are unsuitable in other ways. In fact, it seems like some potentially suitable people are the Toudens. There are a lot of good rumours about them going around - they actually seem to have a very positive reputation! That's what Kabru means when he says "unmask".

So when Kabru is observing something like them giving money to an old comrade from their gold-peeling days, he doesn't consider it a problem because "they're giving money to this person who doesn't actually need it" or because they must have some dark secret if they act superficially nice. I think he actually understands this situation and what it implies about Laios (in particular) perfectly well.

Laios and Falin gave money to an old comrade who got injured and couldn't work. That person then healed up but kept taking their money. Then he used the money to start smuggling illicit goods to the island.

The key is that for Kabru, the problem here is the same as with the corpse retrievers - people using the dungeon's resources to fuel dangerous, selfish, or violent pursuits cause problems for the island, attract more criminals and people with motives other than breaking the curse, and increase the chances of the whole situation ending in tragedy.

Kabru is willing to work with the Shadow Lord of the island if it gets him to his goal - he isn't scrupulous - but the criminal element of the island increasing is something he sees as a major issue.

Also, when you're evaluating someone as a candidate for power, riches, secrets, potentially kingship - then being curious about how the money you give to people is going to be used is kind of a relevant trait!

Interpersonally, Kabru's actually very easygoing - I mean, Mickbell isn't exactly an upstanding guy, is he! But Kabru likes him and they get along well. These traits wouldn't be a problem at all in a friend, or a comrade, or someone Kabru was confident he could use. But he can't get a handle on Laios, and Laios is someone who has the potential to be a major player!

On Laios' end, this is the same as with the marriage seeker who joined their party. She kept asking for things and he gave them to her, because he tries to be nice to others. He even gives her money! It's the exact same thing.

That's fine, but it became a problem because he basically wasn't interested in her motives, didn't notice she was trying to manipulate him, and it also didn't occur to him that the other party members would notice or be affected. We can assume the situation with the gold peeler is the same. When Kabru says that "It's not that they're bad people, they just aren't interested in humans," he isn't wrong.

The extent to which this is true of Laios is linked to his autism imo, (because it isn't just disinterest - he genuinely isn't able to notice nonverbal cues that people are lying to him or have ulterior motives) but to a greater or lesser extent I think it's a very common trait. Most people aren't actually that interested in other people who aren't close to them. Kabru is the weird one here. It isn't an issue except as a leader - which is why we see an immediate comparison to the Island's Lord, because that's how Kabru is evaluating them.

And disinterest in/lack of ability with people to the extent Laios exhibits it, it does, actually, make him a worse leader... it's just that as we see in the story, people can help him out. The rest of the party tell him the marriage seeker is taking advantage of him so he tells her he can't give her special treatment anymore. They're pissed and it's a crisis point - he couldn't have recovered their trust without Marcille and Falin - but that's exactly the point. With Marcille and Falin, he was able to recover their trust.

And he has other good traits that make up for it, such as his intelligence, strategic knowledge, open-mindedness and sense of fairplay.

Kabru doesn't disqualify Laios as a candidate based on what he sees about him from afar, though - he still tries very hard to get close to him, obviously hoping that if he manages he can steer Laios to defeat the dungeon and make up for his lack of people-skills in the aftermath. (Which... he does eventually achieve that goal!) He completely fails until the events of the story, so... definitely I think "They just aren't interested in humans" could also partially be a stung reaction to Laios' complete disinterest in him.

Anyway, that's my read on what exactly Kabru's "issue" with Laios is. Obviously, once he does find out what Laios' true nature is like - about his love for monsters - he develops an entirely new set of fears about Laios' priorities. But since Laios kept that a secret until the start of the story, he has no idea of that yet.

Given all that, I think it's interesting that he says that he doesn't think that the Toudens are suitable to defeat the dungeon, and that he's hoping they'll turn out to be the thieves. As some of his few potential candidates, people who he thinks may play a big role in the island's future, you'd think he'd hope they would be good people!

I suppose it's better, in his eyes, because it means that he's involved in something "interesting". They haven't just had their stuff stolen by regular criminals (boring, puts them further away from his goal) - they've been caught up in the beginning stages of "a historic event". The desperate and dwindling group forgetting morals in their quest to retrieve their lost comrade probably appeals to his sense of melodrama. Because he also just... loves drama.

Despite it being "uglier than anything he was expecting", he still pursues Laios as the person he wants to conquer the dungeon pretty much as soon as it becomes clear that he won't be able to do it himself and they are out of time. That's because... well, to be fair, there aren't any other options. And he fits standard A: he's short-lived!

and Kabru still hopes he can fit standard B, too, and be persuaded to use the power he wins for good. No matter how many nightmares he has about Laios, or whether he thinks about killing him. He doubts him, but ultimately he puts his faith in him and seems happy after the manga's ending that he made the right decision.

#dungeon meshi #dungeon meshi manga spoilers #dungeon meshi meta #kabru of utaya #laios touden #labru #laios x kabru #dunmeshi #og post #kabru is such a big picture thinker. and he evaluates people more than he judges them imo #the hater jokes are funny but the people he judges most harshly arent laios and co. they're people like the island's lord.#but you don't see that as clearly because he isn't interested in the island's lord. he understands him. finds him contemptible but useful.#whereas laios lives in his brain rent free because he WANTS to understand him but doesnt quite.#even though he sees the elves as a major threat to his ultimate goals and dislikes the way they treat short lived races #he still understands and evaluates mithrun as an individual based on his own merits #he's one of the characters who is least judgemental in that sense because while he's always making judgements and evaluations #he's also constantly revising them whenever he gets more information #my beautiful machiavellian prince <3 #it's genuinely a really laudable way of understanding others imo.#the only problem is that because he's driven towards his goals by his PTSD and survivors guilt #he pushes himself into situations (the dungeon and also interpersonally) that trigger him or even just upset him #without regard for what he authentically wants or his own wellbeing.

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saturnsocoolioyep · 5 months

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In the same vein as "I've been taking my medication for long enough that I haven't experienced any symptoms in a while, I must not need to take it anymore! (Spoiler alert: the meds are why you haven't had symptoms)" I present to you a similarly clownish thought process- "I haven't experienced that trigger in a long time, maybe I was just exaggerating how bad it was and it'll be fine to engage with this! (Spoiler alert: take a fucking guess babes)"

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greenglowinspooks · 6 months

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(DCxDP) The obligations of a rogue versus those of a parent (Pt. 4)

—

Tw: descriptions of body horror, Dr. Crane has PTSD and Does Not Realize, Crane has an actual panic attack and just doesn’t care, the Riddler makes one (1) sex joke about Batman

Will be crossposted to AO3 eventually

(Pt. 1 here) (Prev here) - (Pt. 5 here)

(Masterlist here)

—

Dr. Jonathan Crane is in his lab, the acrid scent of chemicals filling the air, and his hands are shaking.

Danny’s health, for the first week that he had him, had been steadily improving at an extremely quick rate. However, his healing had begun to stagnate. Danny said that it was because his body had run out of ectoplasm, and that while there was a lot of ambient ectoplasm in Gotham, he needed a stronger type in order to heal.

And so, that led Dr. Crane here.

He had stolen the research notes from the Penguin years ago regarding his experimentation on him.

(He quite vividly remembers the sound of bone creaking and groaning as it twisted, lengthened. The squelching of shifting tendons and muscles, the strange fabric-like tightening of skin. The feeling of going from man to monster, of losing all claim to his humanity.)

Danny had called him Liminal, part ghost. He had said that he was transformed by, among other things, a kind of synthetic ectoplasm.

Danny needed ectoplasm.

Crane had the research notes. He had every ingredient necessary. And yet, attempt after attempt failed.

The chemical smell burns his nose. His hands tremble.

Dr. Crane is not afraid.

He doesn’t feel fear anymore. He’s tried to, many, many times, but nothing has worked. And yet, his hands are shaking still.

(The horrifying sensation of vertebrae pop-pop-popping along his spine, growing and lengthening. The unbearable itching beneath his skin as toxin glands begin to form. The feeling of his teeth sharpening and elongating, of his skull growing, of his vision changing and brightening. The awful stench of chemicals. The awful stench of ectoplasm.)

Jonathan takes careful note of his shaking hands, his blurring vision, his accelerated heart-rate and shallow breathing.

(Human hands. Human vision. Human heart and lungs and organs.)

He takes note of them, but he does not let that distract him from the task at hand. Danny is not a chemist, but Jonathan is.

The boy knows enough about chemistry in theory, but he won’t go anywhere near Crane’s equipment. He seems to have some sort of intense fear of laboratory settings, probably developed during his stay with the GiW, and Crane is willing to respect that, if only because he cannot afford to lose him.

As such, Crane is the only one qualified to do this. And, unfortunately, if he isn’t successful the boy may very well die.

He heats the chemicals to precisely the right temperatures, adding each one to its correct container.

Dr. Crane thinks of the Scarebeast, that creature born of cruelty and greed and a sense of superiority. That creature which he tries to ignore is a part of him, that can never be removed. A damage which cannot be undone.

He pours the contents of a small beaker into a larger flask, watching the liquids swirl together. The stench in the air is becoming closer and closer to the one burned into his memory.

Crane’s whole body is wracked with unpleasant sensations. It’s truly unfortunate, he thinks, that despite his mind’s lack of fear, his body still reacts so harshly.

Jonathan’s eyes wander, eventually settling on a purple and green card sitting innocently on the corner of the table.

Right.

Even if they wiped out the GiW tomorrow, and even if Danny could survive without ectoplasm, he would still be in danger.

Crane has to get him back to good health. It’s the only way he can be sure that the boy can defend himself properly.

The solution in the flask begins to foam, and Jonathan does not hesitate as he adds the final ingredient. He pours the mixture into a new container, capping it and placing it into a freezer set to -40 degrees.

Hopefully this time he got the timing right.

Jonathan tries to relax, the ventilation in the room slowly but surely clearing the familiar smell from the air.

He thinks of the letter.

Surely, he thinks, that man can come up with some better material for his jokes. Or, at least something new.

Same old threats, same old attempted poisoning.

Aiming his threats at Danny, though, that was new. New and utterly unacceptable.

Scarecrow did what he had to.

He doubted that his solution would last forever, of course, as with that man it never did. As such, he would prepare both himself and Danny for the inevitable moment that his choices came back to bite them.

However, for the moment, they were safe. Danny could rest and recover, and Jonathan could figure out a plan to minimize possible damages.

Jonathan is no longer shaking.

He’s exhausted. This is his fifth attempt today, and each one leaves an unfortunate strain on his mind and body.

With a sigh, he settles himself into his seat at a nearby desk, opening up his computer and logging his most recent attempt. He still has to wait for it to chill to know if it was successful, but he can always update the logs later.

Once he’s done, he stretches, joints popping loudly as he walks to the freezer.

When he sees the results of his tireless work, the ghost of a smile flits across his face.

Success.

Jonathan picks up the jug of ectoplasm and leaves the lab, which is in all actuality the basement of the new apartment that he moved himself and Danny into after receiving the note. The scrappy old woman who was his landlord had told him that as long as he paid her five hundred dollars up front, she would let him set up in the basement without any questions or cop calls.

And so, the most expensive apartment in the Narrows was his.

At least, he thought, the distance between the basement and the apartment was short enough that Danny didn’t have to sit in while he was doing his labwork.

Jonathan knew that he didn’t exactly have a strong grasp on the concept of ‘lab safety,’ proven by his built-up immunity to almost every toxic chemical he’d ever encountered, and he doubted that Danny should be around such an environment.

He was back to the apartment quickly, not bothering to hide the self-satisfied smile on his face. Danny is sitting in his armchair, trying to read one of his books. Danny looks up, ready to greet him, when he sees the jug in his hands and pauses.

“Is that..?”

“Synthetic ectoplasm,” Jonathan says proudly, “I found the Penguin’s research notes and decided to recreate it, since you said that you needed it to heal properly. I’m not sure if it’ll work the same as what you usually have, but I hope it’s helpful all the same.”

Danny is standing, now, and looking at Jonathan with a strange look in his eyes. He looks, Jon thinks, like he’s about to cry.

Then Danny is rushing forward and wrapping his arms around Jonathan, his scrawny form shaking.

Jonathan is, for a moment, horrified. Did he do something wrong somehow? Why is this child, who’s so afraid of touch, hugging him?

And then he hears Danny’s voice, and he knows that it was all worth it.

“Thank you,” he’s mumbling, over and over, “thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you so much.”

“Of course,” Jonathan says softly, because what else can he say?

The boy cries in his arms for a while, and Jonathan briefly wonders what his life must have been like before, if a person like him can be seen as a comforting figure.

Then, Danny pours himself a small glass of the synthetic ectoplasm, putting the rest into the small fridge which had come with the apartment, and he settles back down, sitting in the armchair once again.

Jonathan sits opposite of him, and they chat with one another as Danny drinks.

Danny talks to him about the stars and tells him about different spaceships, and Jonathan makes sure to pay attention and ask the boy questions.

He doesn’t miss the way that Danny lights up every time he asks him something about his interests. He’s so passionate, so smart, a trait that he seldom sees outside of his fellow rogues, and Jonathan wants to encourage that.

It’s…nice. Peaceful, almost.

And then the front door flies open, because Jonathan isn’t allowed to have nice things.

“Jon,” a familiar voice rings out, “what the hell?!”

Danny is frozen in place, clearly terrified.

Jonathan heaves a sigh, turning to face the nuisance who’s entered his apartment.

“Eddie,” he drawls, “to what do I owe the pleasure?”

Edward’s face is red with anger as he invades Jonathan’s apartment.

“Oh, I don’t know! Maybe it’s the fact that you sent a bunch of rogues a cryptic message and then dropped off the face of the earth for two weeks! I was worried, Jon!”

Jonathan hums in acknowledgement.

“I didn’t think it was that cryptic,” he says, picking up a book in order to pointedly ignore the Riddler.

“Oh, of course you didn’t, you straw-stuffed hickory dickory dickhead. I swear, you’re always—” he pauses, finally having noticed Danny sitting opposite of Jonathan, “—who is this?”

“My apprentice,” Jonathan replies, dreading the upcoming headache he was no doubt going to develop from Edward’s company, “he’s helping me hunt down the GiW. His name is Danny.”

Edward gasps dramatically.

“You—an apprentice?! And you’re letting him sit in the old man chair?! You don’t even let me sit in the old man chair,” he wails, draping himself over the headrest of the couch with a flourish, “Jonathan, I thought I knew you!”

“Edward,” Jonathan says, “get out of my apartment.”

“Oh my goodness, this is incredible. You’re becoming the bat!”

“I am not becoming the bat, Eddie, now get out.”

Edward has a shit-eating grin on his face as he waltzes over to Danny. Danny, who seemed terrified when he first appeared, is now looking at him with obvious amusement written all over his face.

“I mean, look at him! The hair, the eyes, the scrappy build. If you put him in one of those traffic light vigilante costumes, he could easily pass as a Robin!”

“I’m not doing this with you today, Eddie.”

“Riddle me this, Jon: I am a treasure hidden inside of a chest. You can break me, or steal me, or give me a rest. I can flutter, or pound, or attack, or drop, but if you don’t have me, you’re certainly fucked. What am I?”

Jonathan pauses for a moment before he groans, dropping his head into his hands.

“Eddie.”

Danny sits still, a confused look on his face as he repeats the riddle silently. Then, his face lights up in delight.

“A heart!”

“Jon, I like this one,” Edward says with a smile, ruffling Danny’s hair, “you are correct! A heart, something that I wasn’t aware that our dear Jonathan had!”

“Eddie, stop.”

“No, no,” Edward says, “I was worried about you, you deserve this. I mean, you even missed girls night! You never miss girls night!”

“Girls night?” Danny asks, absolutely delighted.

“Oh, of course,” Edward says, sprawling over on the couch, dangerously close to just laying in Jonathan’s lap, “we have it once a week. I’m invited because of Selina and Jon’s invited because Harley likes him.”

“And what does girls night entail, exactly?”

“Eddie,” Jonathan groans, “please.”

“Well,” Edward hums, “we usually paint our nails, or watch a movie, or gossip about the other rogues, and occasionally, we tell each other about any ‘encounters’ we have with Batman,” he says, raising his eyebrows up and down.

Danny’s jaw drops.

“Edward, shut up,” Jonathan says, an irritated tone in his voice that wasn’t there before.

“No way,” Danny says, “I thought that Batman, like, hated you guys or something. You mean he actually..?”

“Oh, the Bat is much like a bottle of liquor or a cheap cigarette, in that he was made to be passed around.”

Danny chokes on air.

“Edward Nygma,” Jonathan hisses, getting out of his seat and looming over the man, “get the hell out.”

Edward pales.

“Leaving, leaving!” Edward says, dashing away from Jonathan. He pauses, turning to flash Danny a quick smile.

“Remember Danny, I’m your favorite uncle! Not any of the other rogues, me!”

With that, he leaves, the room falling completely silent.

And, as per usual, that silence does not last.

“You full-named him?” Danny asks gleefully, “and it worked?”

Jonathan just sighs, sitting down on the couch and rubbing at his temples.

“Please, don’t take anything Eddie says seriously. He’s a moron.”

“Dr. Crane, please let me come to girls night with you,” Danny pleads, his eyes sparkling, “I promise I won’t embarrass you.”

Jonathan groans.

“Of course you won’t, Eddie will do it for you.”

“Come on, please?”

“I think we’re a bit busy with the GiW at the moment,” Jonathan snaps. He pauses as he notices the crestfallen expression on Danny’s face.

This boy is going to be the death of him.

“Perhaps, though, when all that is taken care of…”

Danny cheers, grinning wildly, and Jonathan is not at all relieved to see him happy again. Certainly not.

The rest of the day is relatively normal.

Danny works on trying to get information from the GiW database while Crane refines his his fear toxin, both preparing for a raid on the GiW base they located in Gotham.

It was only a temporary base, nothing of note, but there was a chance of discovering more bases through it, and that wasn’t something either of them were willing to give up.

Still, something like this would take time. Rushing would only lead to failure.

…

Late in the night, long after Danny is fast asleep in his room, Jonathan pauses.

The GiW are not the only threat out there. They aren’t the only threat to him or to Danny. Perhaps it could be helpful to reach out to someone with greater resources than himself.

He sends a quick message to Red Hood.

Hopefully, he thinks, everything will go smoothly.

—

#dcxdp #dc x dp #dp x dc #dpxdc #dp x dc crossover #dc x dp fic #liminal scarecrow #Jon’s PTSD is triggered by the smell of ectoplasm because his life is a nightmare #HDJFNDNDNFKDJF #I am the master of emotional whiplash #rip Jon just trying to have some peace in this fucking house #never gonna happen king 🫡#oh also Eddie is not lying that bat can manwhore #and like half the rogues in Gotham know this from experience #and also most of the JL #and some of JL dark #btw Eddie and Jon are besties #they’re both awful but they make it work #when Jon full-names Eddie that just means that if he doesn’t stop whatever he’s doing he’s gonna get a dose of fear toxin #Eddie isn’t intimidating enough to full-name anyone so if he gets mad he just bashes whoever in the head with his cane #Jon is the living embodiment of ‘me and my girl don’t argue she bash me in the head with a rock and I walk it off like a man’#also side note I’m not doing any ships in this #because I don’t want to #they are just Like That #if you wanna read it that way though it’s completely fine #also shoutout 2 that one scriddler fic on ao3 that helped inspire that riddle LMAO

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stealingpotatoes · 8 months

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“poncho: jedi master edition” is such a good and necessary cal kestis form, seeing him attempt to teach a gaggle of padawans is simply the best thing i could imagine. i hope they also roast him sometimes in true middle schooler fashion <3

ok so i drew this AGES ago (way before the other post) and I think this counts as an excuse to post it! they probably do accidentally roast him a little but one of the ways they forget compassion in lieu of middle schooler "dont care about adults" is:

#i just thought 'ok luke recovering old jedi texts is great but cal's gonna touch one and just relive o66'#or some other random jedi temple stuff that'll basically trigger his ptsd lol #cue luke grabbing merrin and running in like HEY CAL YOU GOOD???? SORRY MY STUDENTS HAVENT CLOCKED THE COMPASSION THING YET #kofi subscribers have had this for like. a month LOL #luke skywalker #luke's jedi academy #merricaldemy #star wars #luke's students #aaren #alela #sayuri ireshla #my doods #thanks for the ask!

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ravenlostsnippets · 2 years

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“These Nightmares keep Killing You” possible stony

The Avengers end up in a safehouse after a stressful mission. Natasha and Clint have to sleep in the same bed, Bruce and Thor have to do the same and then so do Steve and Tony. Tony’s apprehensive but Steve is tired and makes him get over it.

Only, Steve wakes up to Tony shaking and muttering and then the Iron Man suit attacks him and well, after that Tony just falls completely apart.

(And ig Tony sorta has PTSD of Pepper walking out on him during a panic attack and when he wakes up, he’s scared that the Avengers are going to blame him and get angry at him so that’s why he starts crying).

Steve, bleary eyed, looked around the room and tried not to yawn. He was a light sleeper and the shifting and shaking Tony was doing was waking him up. He sat up and rubbed his eyes, raising his hand to gently shake Tony so maybe he would stop but then he got a good look at the genius.

The other man was tightly clutching his pillow with a death grip and when Steve looked over Tony’s shoulder, his face was knit together with worry, panic, and pain. He continued to shake and was muttering something and even seized sometimes like he was being hit.

Now Steve was really concerned.

“Tony?” he asked, whispering a bit and went to gently shake him as his mind whirled trying to find a way to safely wake Tony up when he heard a yell and then all of a sudden, there was a flurry of motion and Steve was being attacked -

By the Iron Man armor?

It must’ve been responding to Tony and Steve tried to get it to stop without breaking it but that wasn’t working. It just went full throttle at him until Steve ripped the arm off. And when that happened, he briefly heard Tony wake up with a gasp and then a shout and then the armor fell apart, splicing itself and falling to various pieces on the ground.

Steve stared at it, breathing a little hard in stilted silence.

And then he heard Tony talking and babbling and Steve turned around to look at him as words just fell out of the other man’s mouth.

“ - so sorry, I didn’t think it would happen but I guess I was just more stressed then I thought - god Steve I’m so sorry -”

“Whoa, hey,” Steve shook his head, still thinking. “It’s okay, promise, I just - what...what happened?”

Tony looked pale and sick and weak. “I - I just - I -” He swallowed hard and started to shake again and Steve felt upcoming horror when he realized that Tony’s eyes were wet and he looked seconds from crying.

“Who’s attacking?!” Clint’s voice shouted and Steve startled a little whereas Tony full on jumped. The other four Avengers came in, Natasha and Clint with a gun in hand. Thor just looked sleepy and confused while Bruce also looked asleep and even yawned for a second.

“What?” Steve barely recognized his voice.

Clint frowned. “The Iron Man armor just flew by - I figured someone was attacking so where’d they go?”

And Tony must be really tired or stressed or just feel really really bad because he chose that moment to burst into tears.

Everyone froze in surprise.

“I’m sorry!” Tony sobbed. “I thought I could - I didn’t mean to!”

“Tony, hey,” Steve, reacting on instinct, grabbed Tony’s wrist and pulled him into a hug. Tony started to cry into his shirt and Steve just rubbed his arms. “It’s alright. You’re okay. I promise,” Steve soothed him and almost started to hum but didn’t as Tony’s tears turned to sniffles.

“Wait…” Clint blinked and shook his head. “So...no attacker?”

“No just,” Steve stopped. “A...nightmare?”

“A nightmare,” Clint repeated and Natasha tilted her head before walking over beside the bed.

“Yeah I guess,” Steve shrugged a little helplessly, trying to show that he was still confused as well.

“Night - nightmare -” Tony gasped out, holding onto Steve tightly. “I - I’ve had them since - since Afghanistan and - and New York - New York made it - made it worse - and I - I knew it was a problem - it - it’s why me and Pep - Pepper - didn’t - we didn’t work out and - I just thought that - I thought it wouldn’t - I didn’t think that it would - I’m sorry -”

“You really need to stop apologizing,” Natasha said flippantly. “You had a nightmare. So what? We all do.”

“Yeah but you don’t summon your titanium alloy armor - a weapon of destruction - when you do, do you?” Tony snapped back, sniffling again.

“Well no, but I would probably shoot you,” Natasha rebuked and Tony blinked. “Plus, Steve was fine. See?” Tony blinked again and then looked up at Steve.

Steve startled. “Yeah, yeah, I’m fine. See?”

And then they get shit figured out and steve has a night by himself and realizes that he slept the best at the safehouse with tony so he convinces tony for them to sleep together - just SLEEP - and it actually works, they go a week without having nightmares either of them, so they just continue to do that and well obviously feelings happen (or maybe feelings don’t develop and they’re just buds who sleep better together….LOL)

#stony #snippet #fic idea #ptsd trigger #tw nightmare #tw ptsd flash

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one-abuse-survivor · 2 years

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How do I tell my best friend that something he did triggered/worsened a flashback and that (based on what he knows about me and my ptsd) he should have known not to do it? I don't want to make him feel like I'm mad at him or something but I also need him to know that he can't do this thing around me. It's a benign enough thing, it just happens to be a trigger, and I've told him that before

Communication is a very personal thing, and I can’t tell you what your friend needs to hear to not feel like you’re mad at him, nonnie. But if it were me talking with someone close to me, I think I’d start by saying there’s something I want to discuss/a boundary I need to set regarding my triggers, and I’d say, “I’m not mad. I’m telling you because I trust you and I appreciate you a lot, and I want you to know how to help me feel safe.” And then I’d explain that I need them to be more careful around this boundary I’ve set before, and be clear about what is a trigger for me (eg. if it’s a word and they used it jokingly in a conversation, I’d be clear that “I don’t want to hear that word, even if it’s said in a joking tone”).

If they show any concerns, I’d assure them I know they didn’t do it on purpose last time, but it did trigger me, and that’s why I wanted them to know. I’d thank them for listening. I don’t know if I’d do this, but if you want, you can also ask if they have any questions or concerns, and then ask if they want to do something nice you usually do together so you can both feel reassured that everything is fine.

I hope some of this helps! I’m glad you want to talk about this with him. Sometimes we need to remind the people who love us of our triggers or boundaries more than once, especially if they didn’t realise how important this was for us. It happens.

Best of luck! Feel free to update me if you want to! Sending a virtual hug ❤️

#ask #ptsd #ptsd tw #ptsd flashback #ptsd trigger #trauma tw #trauma flashback

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fathersonholygore · 2 years

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[Fantasia 2022] Confronting, Conquering, & Decolonising Trauma in DARK NATURE

Dark Nature (2022) Directed & Written by Berkley Brady Starring Hannah Emily Anderson, Kyra Harper, Madison Walsh, Helen Belay, Daniel Arnold, & Roseanne Supernault. Horror ★★★★1/2 (out of ★★★★★) DISCLAIMER: The following essay contains SIGNIFICANT SPOILERS. Turn back, lest ye be spoiled! The horror genre is loved for many reasons, one of them being because it’s a way to confront actual…

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#Berkley Brady #Colonialism #Decolonisation #Domestic Abuse #Hannah Emily Anderson #Madison Walsh #Métis #PTSD #PTSD Trigger #Trauma #Violence

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thesockwhisperer · 10 months

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The 4th of July can be fun but fireworks are the W O R S T. I hope everyone who struggles with the sounds and lights of it all (like me :/) can hopefully have a not terrible night. Same goes for folks with ptsd that is triggered by the fireworks!

Update: I LIVE (barely)

#4th of july #fireworks #nuerodiversity #memes #sensory #spd #ptsd #tramua #triggers #autism #adhd #nuerodivergent #nuerodivergency

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dragonpyre · 2 months

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I'm a chronic migraine Jason Todd truther. Except he doesn't know they're migraines. Poor guy will be layed up on his couch for days wondering what wizard he pissed off cuz light hurts, sounds hurt, he thinks he's gonna throw up, his vision doesn't work right, and also there's an invisible rail spike driving itself into his skull. Then his thinks it's a Pit side affect or some other weird thing.

But no. It's just migraines

#they're triggered by his general PTSD and stress #and YES this is me projecting onto my blorbo #shut up #i just think he should have some mundane bullshit that's easily fixable #like just take some excedrin bro #jason todd #dc #red hood #migraines #batman #text post

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rayyeehaw · 2 years

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Why do Americans fire off fireworks for major holidays??? Like man, it puts me on edge so much. My poor cats too...

#rant #ptsd #fireworks #memorial day #american #america #trigger #ptsd trigger

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