#At least this was a good practice for my English lessons

[kunikidas-lost-glasses]

- Theory on Dazai's family -

- Why I think that Dazai is closely related to the former boss of the Port Mafia - A BSD analysis based on facts from the main manga series, the light novel "Bungo Stray Dogs: Dazai, Chuuya Age Fifteen" and the manga "Bungo Stray Dogs: Dazai, Chuuya Age Fifteen" -

Contains heavy spoilers for Dazai's backstory, the Dazai, Chuuya Age Fifteen manga and the Age Fifteen light novel

TWs: Dazai typical mentions of sewerslide, mentioned abuse, picture which shows a scene in a hospital explicitly

English isn't my first language so I apologize for any grammar mistakes.

Not completely proof read by now since I realized that I have a lot of homework while proof reading and panicked. Will be proof read in the next 24h.

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Okay so I had this theory since I read the age 15 novel last year but I've never got around writing it down since some pieces were still missing.

In the following I will first talk about Dazai's relationship with Mori and showing parts of the age 15 novel to proof why they very popular theory that Mori is Dazai's father/a relative cannot be true. Afterwards I will talk about my theory that Dazai was already in Mafia, way before he met Mori before I will talk about my theory about why I think that Dazai is closely related to the former boss of the port mafia is either Dazai's father or a close relative like a grandfather or uncle and gonna show supporting proof from the BSD light novel "Dazai and Chuuya age 15", the BSD age 15 manga and the main BSD manga series.

1. Why Mori cannot be Dazai's father or a relative

Mori being Dazai's father or being directly related to him is a very popular opinion in the BSD fandom and which is very popular especially under anime onlys or new fans. To be honest, I had this theory too when I first started watching BSD but by now I am completely sure that this cannot be true.

Direct proof for this can be found in the BSD light novel "Dazai and Chuuya age 15" which reveals a lot about Dazai's and Chuuya's past in the Port Mafia as well as about some characters in general.

In this light novel it gets clear that Mori and Dazai are still pretty much strangers which are connected through the murder of the former boss of the Port Mafia. This also gets specifically stated in said novel on page 8 and page 7.

As stated here, they've been brought together by common destiny.

On page 7 however, is a even better proof that they aren't related at all and it also gives out another very interesting information about Dazai's family.

As stated here, on page seven, Dazai is "neither Mori's secret illegitimate child nor an orphan he adopted [...] ". I think that with this information, we can be pretty sure that Dazai isn't related to Mori at all. It also gets stated again that they are bound together by "common destiny" instead of any kind of relation.

Very interesting is, that it gets mentioned that Dazai isn't an orphan which Mori adopted since this information can be read in two ways. One option is, that he simply isn't adopted by Mori while the second option is, that he isn't an orphan at all. (English isn't my first language so I don't know if it can be read in only one way so feel free to correct me.)

The last proof for that Mori and Dazai aren't related to each other, can be found on page 9.

The whole page makes clear, that Mori doesn't really know Dazai at all/ that he only knows him for only one year and that he only knows him on a "Coworker level". He isn't familiar with Dazai's way of thinking, speaking and acting. He simply cannot figure Dazai out and he is kind of scared of him. Dazai isn't someone he knows since a long time. If anything, he is still trying to get to know Dazai and his ways of thinking. If Mori knew Dazai since a very long time, I'm sure that he would know at least a bit about how Dazai acts and reacts to things so that he wouldn't get as uneasy as on this text page, when Dazai is showing his serious, cold and calculating side again.

This is only a speculation though since Dazai and his ways of acting and thinking are in fact nearly completely impossible to figure out for nearly everyone.

Besides this, there is a clear distance between them without any familiarity. This distance can be often found between strangers who know each other solely through working together for whatever reason, but who never hang out together in the way friends or relatives do, which creates this distance between them.

Now that I've shown some proof which supports the theory, that Dazai isn't related to Mori in any way, I'm firstly going to show proof for why I think that Dazai was already in the Mafia, way before he met Mori before I will talk about why I think that Dazai is specifically related to the former boss of the Port Mafia.

2. Why Dazai had to be in the Mafia, way before he met Mori

Now, about why Dazai had to be in the Mafia way before he met Mori.

As seen in one of those panels of the first phase of the age 15 manga, Dazai is dressed on somewhat formal attire, wearing a white button up shirt and dress pants. Those clothes suit him perfectly and they look rather formal and expensive so it's unlikely that they were given to him after he got brought to the hospital. Those are his own clothes.

Now, if he would be an orphan who lived on the streets, which is another popular theroy in the fandom, he wouldn't be wearing such clothes.

Also such black and white, formal clothes/suits are commonly worn in the port mafia, often by people of a higher rank or by guards which suggests that there is some kind of a dress code among the Port Mafia. The clothes which Dazai is wearing, suit perfectly into the dress code of the port mafia.

Another point as to why he had to be in the Mafia already is the fact that he was brought to Mori, an shady underground doctor and the personal physician of the former boss of the port mafia after attempting suicide. If he would have been a normal child, no matter if orphan or not, he would have been brought to a normal official hospital in Yokohama and not to Mori.

Besides this, Mori is well aware who Dazai is, calling him by his name which suggests that Dazai isn't only already in the port mafia but also that he is known there and not just another nameless assistant.

Of course, Mori could have been informed about who this kid is by the person who brought him to him but if Dazai would really have been a random kid who wasn't involved in the Mafia, they wouldn't have any information about his name.

All of these points like the expensive and formal clothing, the fact that he seems to be involved with the Mafia already, the fact that he was brought to the underground doctor Mori (who is also the personal physician of the former boss of the port mafia) and the fact that Mori knows who Dazai is, lead me to the next point which is why I believe that Dazai is closely related to the former boss of the port mafia.

3. Why I think that Dazai is closely related to the former boss of the Port Mafia

Firstly, all the previously mentioned facts like the expensive clothes and all, are things which support my theroy in some ways but of course they aren't enough proof since alone from those facts alone, we could also think that Dazai is simply related to a executive or someone in the Mafia who has a higher rank but there are things which lead me to think that Dazai is related to the former boss of the port mafia.

Let me show you.

First of all, Higuchi telling Dazai that Dazai's blood is not only "Mafia black" but also that it's more Mafia black than anyone else's in the country.

While this could also be seen as her referring to him being the feared demon prodigy, it also suggests that he is deeply connected with the port mafia. Also, talking about a connection to something through someone's blood gets often used to hint that someone is connected with something through family.

With saying that his blood is more black than anyone else's, she also says that he is deeper connected with the Mafia than Mori, Hirotsu, Chuuya or any of the other loyal members of the Mafia and besides this, she also tells him through this, that he would be more cruel than any of them.

Now the only other person about who they talk like this and who gets referred to be more cruel and deeply involved with the port mafia, who is basically anchored in the history of the port mafia, is the former boss of the port mafia himself.

Higuchi saying that his blood is mafia black, more than anyone's in the whole county, could easily be a hint that Dazai is in fact, related in some way to the only other person who's blood is mafia black, the former boss.

While this point is more based on speculation, the next point is based a lot more on the things which are actually specifically shown in the manga.

During the flashback which shows how the former boss of the port mafia died, we can see that Dazai isn't standing next to Mori but far away from the bed next to the big window.

If Mori wanted to make Dazai pretend that he would be his new assistant, Dazai would stand next to the bed or would stand at least close to Mori to "watch and learn", to assist him or to hand him any tools or medicine he might need but this isn't the case. He is standing far away from Mori and the bed, silently watching and not assisting at all. He isn't holding any tools and he also obviously isn't looking for anything which he needs to bring Mori. Here he has the role of a bystander and is the witness.

But why would Mori bring a random child with him, only to watch him and which would later be his witness. It would make no sense and it would make him seem even more suspicious. Even if he would have waited with the murder, bringing Dazai with him a couple of times before killing the boss, it would make him look suspicious. After all, suddenly bringing a child with him which then suddenly happens to be the only witness, really is suspicious and I doubt that Mori would have made such a risky and unwell calculated plan.

If that would be the case he also could have picked any child or like any person in the Mafia. After all, there are a lot of people who wanted to see the former boss of the port mafia dead because of his brutal and cruel way of leading the Mafia and because of all the terrible crimes but again.

However, despite the large amount of people who would (most likely) happily assist Mori with getting rid of the former boss, he directly approached Dazai and he does so confidently as shown here:

He seems like he knew exactly that Dazai wouldn't deny his request and he also seems as if he had picked Dazai to be his perfect assistant for this case but I genuinely don't think, that it's only because Dazai is a suicide patient.

In both, the manga and the light novel, Dazai tells Mori that of course the latter would see him as the perfect assistant because he would need to get rid of everyone who was aware of what really happened during that night and since nobody would suspect a thing if Dazai would suddenly commit suicide under unknown circumstances but while this is a good point, more on the other hand states in the light novel that he can't let him die because then the supporters of the previous boss would turn on Mori and claim that he would have killed the predecessor but I will come back to that in a second.

As previously mentioned, I don't think that Dazai being suicidial was the point which made Mori choose him as his assistant. After all, it wouldn't make anything less suspicious due to the reasons I mentioned previously.

So why did he pick Dazai if suddenly bringing a person with him, shortly before murdering the predecessor would only raise suspicions?

Well it would only raise suspicions if the person wasn't already in the room before he came to visit the boss and if they weren't in this room already since quite some time.

This is one of my main points to support the theroy and it also suits to the fact that Mori wouldn't risk seeming any more suspicious throughout bringing a random person with him and it also suits to the fact that Dazai is standing far away from the bed, obviously not pretending to be a new assistant of Mori.

Dazai stands far away from the bed, like someone who was in the room already, way before the doctor came in and he steps away from the bed to give room for the doctor so that he can do his work properly. It is a common thing to do for relatives, friends or coworkers who had been staying at the bedside of the bedridden person.

Now why would Dazai be in this room, staying with the pervious boss of the port mafia as the only person.

He is too young to be a guard and he can't be a person who was carrying out missions for the previous boss since Mori is in fact the person who gives Dazai his first mission ever which is to investigate about the rumors of the previous boss of the port mafia coming back as a ghost. It can be seen on this page of the manga where Mori specifically states that this is Dazai's first job as a official member of the Mafia.

So if Dazai can't be a guard, isn't pretending to be Mori's assistant, if it's too suspicious if Mori would bring a random person with him shortly before carrying out his plan and if Dazai can't be someone who carries out missions, and especially if he isn't an official working member of the Mafia until that very moment in which Mori gives him his first mission and welcomes him as an official member of the Mafia, which, by the way, takes place around one whole year after Mori killed the predecessor, why should Dazai be staying in that room since quite some time, by the bedside of the former boss of the port mafia?

The only logical reason for this would be that he is in fact related to the boss of the port mafia in some way and due to this, stays by the side of his relative to help him in his weak, dying and bedridden state. There wouldn't be any other reason for him to keep Dazai around and if there would be, all the other points like Dazai being dressed formal and expensively and Mori knowing who Dazai is wouldn't suit into the whole situation anyways.

If Dazai only would serve as some kind of a servant, he would be someone unknown in the Mafia and they probably wouldn't have brought him to Mori after his attempt.

My last proof which supports my theroy is Dazai's reaction to having to face the former boss of the port mafia again during the fight against Arthur Rimbaud/Randou but also the bosses reaction to facing Dazai again.

On page 95 in the light novel, Dazai and Chuuya face the former boss for the first time in the whole novel and both, the reaction of Dazai and if the both is very interesting and supports my theroy a lot.

Chuuya who was never directly involved with the port mafia and the former boss and only knows about his crimes /was indirectly another victim of one of his crimes, hasn't a very specific reaction towards facing the boss and the boss also only sees him as someone he has attack without any personal connection between them.

Dazai however reacts not only chaught off guard like Chuuya upon seeing the dead body of the former boss of the port mafia standing in front of them, talking and moving but during the whole fight he doesn't say as much as he usually would and is more confused, tensed up and seemingly very uncomfortable and nervous. He does try to cover it up with sarcastic remarks and through smiling but it is very noticeable in the way he acts and talks.

Upon seeing the port mafia boss, Dazai's smile becomes tense and he seems uneasy and he continues to act like this even after knowing that it's only Arthur's ability. It can't be only because he is worried about the boss telling others what really happened since they are currently in Arthur's hyperspace and the boss isn't going anywhere. The whole situation of having to see and having to talk to this person again seems to make him feel uneasy and uncomfortable which makes him turn more quiet, confused and more serious during the whole battle. It actually takes some time until he acts more relaxed and calculating like he usually does during a fight and until he stops bombarding Arthur with questions.

The former boss of the port mafia on the other hand, (and this is an incredibly interesting and overlooked part), calls Dazai "My boy" upon seeing him again, asks him Mori/ "The good doctor" has been treating him well and refrers to Dazai's face as a familiar face before he calls him my boy upon fully recognizing him. He also tells Dazai that it feel like ages since he last say him which implies that they saw each other and knew each other regularly. Him calling him my boy definitely supports that Dazai is related to him and I think it's self explanatory why. If Dazai was only some coworker, he wouldn't be referring to him as my boy.

The way Dazai talks to him also seems like he isn't talking to someone he only vaguely knows.

The distance which is present when he is communicating with Mori isn't present here and the whole way he talks to him and how he is building the sentences but also how the former boss of the port mafia is referring to him as well as how he talks to Dazai, is making clear that they know each other past the level of only coworkers as well as that they aren't just boss and normal subordinate.

The fact that Dazai refers to him as boss, the fact that Dazai assists Mori's with his plan, the way they talk to each other or better the way in which Dazai talks to the predecessor and that the fact the former boss of the port mafia isn't having any issues with killing/attempting to kill Dazai and even shows some kind of enthusiasm towards it, talking about it in a way which is implying that he already hated Dazai way before Dazai assisted Mori ("[...] I never imagined a day would come where I could behead this boy with my own two hands", the previous Mafia boss crowed hoarsely." (p.98;ll.26-28;" Bungo Stray Dogs: Dazai, Chuuya, Age Fifteen") shows the nature of the relationship between those two.

Most likely, the predecessor wasn't treating Dazai good, most likely abusing him which lead Dazai to assisting Mori and which would explain the way they talk to each other as well as Dazai's negative and almost scared reaction upon seeing the previous boss again.

Given the predecessors cruel, cold and brutal personality as well as his obsession with surpressing and killing people/people who acted against the Mafia, it isn't unlikely that he was also abusive towards Dazai.

Another quote which implies that they know each other since quite some time, can be found on page 98 in the light novel where the boss is "mourning" about the fact that his body isn't capable anymore of talking about the past before he kills Dazai. ("" If only we could chat about old times first, [...] "" (P. 98; ll.28-29)

The fact that Arthur also states that he preserved the former bosses personality and memories (P. 99; l.1) proofs that the memories of the boss as well as the way he acts isn't altered at all.

With all of these facts which suggest that Dazai is related to the former boss of the Port Mafia, it also makes sense why Mori needs Dazai to stay alive. Not only it would seem suspicious if Dazai suddenly dies, even if he would die of suicide but also because then, if Dazai would truly be related to the former boss of the Port Mafia, it would seem like Mori got rid of the person who rightfully is the next boss of the Port Mafia in order to be completely sure that he can be the next boss until he dies.

If we see it like this, it would also make even more sense as to why Mori was so scared that Dazai would kill him one day, just like how he killed the former boss in order to become the next leader of the Port Mafia because then he wouldn't just be afraid because of the "Evil expects evil from others" rule, but also because he and Dazai would both be painfully aware of the fact that Dazai is rightfully the next Boss of the Port Mafia and not Mori.

To summarize, Dazai cannot be related to Mori at all. Not only is this specifically stated in the light novel "Bungo Stray Dogs: Dazai, Chuuya, Age Fifteen" but the fact that Mori is still trying to figure out Dazai, that he isn't familiar with Dazai's way of acting and thinking and the fact that there is a constant, somewhat formal distance between them suggests that they genuinely didn't know each other before Mori asked Dazai to be his assistant/witness in his plan to murder the former boss of the port mafia.

Now despite not being related to Mori in any way, Dazai still seems to be involved with the Port Mafia already, way before he met Mori. Proof for that can mainly be found in the BSD Dazai, Chuuya, Age Fifteen manga.

There, Dazai is shown to wear formal and expensive looking clothes when he wakes up after another suicide attempt and Mori greets Dazai with his name, seemingly being well aware of who Dazai is. If Dazai would have been a random kid p.ex. from the streets, he wouldn't be wearing such clothes and Mori wouldn't know his name but he also wouldn't have been brought to the underground doctor Mori who also happens to be the personal physician of the former boss of the port mafia but to a normal and official hospital in Yokohama.

Alone due to the fact that he got brought to Mori, he had to be involved with the port mafia already otherwise he wouldn't had end up in that hospital. Now, him being well dressed, Mori knowing his name and him being brought to Mori instead of to an official hospital could also imply that he is only the son of an executive or another person in the Mafia who is of high rank but the fact that Higuchi tells Dazai years later that his blood is mafia black, more than anyone else's in the country as well as the fact that Mori chooses him to assist him in his plan of murdering the former boss of the port mafia as well as Dazai's position in the bosses room while Mori carries out his plan and his role in this plan imply that he isn't just related to a random person but rather the former boss of the port mafia himself.

Mori could have chosen anyone to be his witness, especially in regards of how many people want to see the former boss dead but he directly approaches Dazai and does so confidently as shown in the age fifteen manga. He seems to be sure that Dazai would assist him but he also seems to be sure that this won't raise any more suspicious.

If he would have started to bring a random person with him to his regular visits to the former boss, shortly before he murders him and the fact that this random person is suddenly his only witness would raise only more suspicious about him killing the boss and given Mori's character, I doubt that he would plan something so risky and uncalculated where it's sure that it would cause him more trouble than anything.

So why did he choose a seemingly random kid as his witness if suddenly bringing a person with him would only raise suspicions in the end? Because there won't be any more suspicious than there are already if the person is located in the former bosses room anyways and regularly.

The theroy that Dazai stays at the room of the former boss gets supported by the fact that Mori is specifically choosing him, seemingly being sure that this won't raise suspicions and the fact that Dazai isn't staying close to the bed or at least next to Mori while he is "treating" the former boss, not pretending to be Mori's assistant. Dazai is standing far away from Mori and the bed as a silent witness next to the window. Stepping away from the bed so that the doctor can treat the person is a common thing to do for relatives, friends or coworkers who had been staying at the bedside of the bedridden person. If Dazai would have pretended to be Mori's assistant he would be staying close to Mori, only stepping away from the bed to get something which Mori needs but this isn't the case. Also the suspicions didn't raise because of Dazai and everything went as Mori planned which is supporting the theory that Dazai was already regularly in the room.

Now why would the port mafia boss keep a child around in his room/at his bedside. Dazai is too young to be a guard, he isn't a official member of the Mafia who carries out missions since it is shown in the manga that Mori is in fact the person who gives Dazai his first mission ever and who is welcoming him as an member of the Mafia after giving him the mission, implying that Dazai wasn't an official member of the Mafia until that very moment which took place around one year after Mori successfully carried his plan out and if Dazai would have only acted as some kind of servant, he wouldn't have been dressed this well, Mori most likely wouldn't have known who Dazai is and he most likely wouldn't have been brought to Mori after his attempt. We can see how the most servants/slaves are treated in the chapter with Ace in the main manga and since the previous boss was even more cruel and brutal than Ace, he wouldn't have treated his servants any better. Given those circumstances, the only logical reason for him keeping Dazai around in his room, is that Dazai is in fact related to him in some way and is now staying at his bedside in order to help him in his weak, dying and bedridden state.

That they know each other past the levels of only boss and subordinate/ coworkers gets shown in the fight against Arthur Rimbaud/Randou where the former boss calls Dazai "My boy" and mourns about the fact that they cannot talk about the old times before he kills Dazai. They also talk to each other in a way which suggests that they know each other since a long time in a relative kind of way.

While Chuuya reacts chaught off guard towards seeing the previous boss as well but while he reacts in a way which makes clear that they never knew each other personally, Dazai tenses up and is nervous and feels uneasy through the whole fight upon having to face the boss again. It takes him a while until he acts more collected, serious and calculating like he usually does in a fight again but the uneasyness never fades fully, no matter how much he tries to cover it up.

The way they talk to each other also implies a deep rooted hate from both sides. The former boss also shows no issues with killing Dazai, implies that he already hated Dazai way before he assisted Mori and even shows some kind of enthusiasm towards killing the child.

In general, given the former bosses cruel, cold and brutal personality and given the way they interact with each other/react towards having to face each other again, it is likely that the former boss was abusive towards Dazai/that the nature of thier relationship was abusive.

During the whole fight, both talk with each other in way which suggests that they know each other personally since quite some time and the formal distance which is always present when Dazai and Mori communicate with each other isnt present between them during thier conversations, making it seem even more like they are related in some way.

All these facts, from the former boss referring to Dazai as "My boy" to Dazai's position in the room and his role in Mori's plan, lead me to think that Dazai is in fact closely related to the former boss of the port mafia. I consciously decided not to refer to the former boss as Dazai's father since I wouldn't go as far as to pinpoint the exact relation but I am almost completely sure he is closely related to him and I think it's likely that he is at least his grandfather or his uncle.

If you read all of this, I love you <3

#I had this theroy since months #My first analysis #I reached the picture limit so I had to quote the last two parts from the novel #Dazai is closely related to the former boss of the port Mafia and nothing can change my opinion unless Asagiri himself releases #This is also me proving that I do in fact understand the characters and engage a lot with diffrent bsd content despite positing a ooc hc #I wrote this instead of doing homework #Help #At least this was a good practice for my English lessons #bsd #bungo stray dogs #bungou gay dogs #bungou stray dogs #bsd analysis #bungou stray dogs analysis #bsd dazai #bsd dazai osamu #bsd osamu dazai #bsd mori #bsd mori ougai #bsd ougai mori #bsd chuuya #bsd chuuya nakahara #bsd nakahara chuuya #bsd arthur #bsd arthur rimbaud #bsd randou #bsd manga #bsd light novel #bsd age 15 #bungoustraydogsmanga

[vanteguccir]

In control | Chris Sturniolo

Chris Sturniolo x reader

Summary: Where Chris commands Y/N to stay still while he fucks her, but she can't seem to obey.

Warning: smut (mdni), dom!Chris, p in v without protection, slight dumbfication/degradation.

Requested?: Yes, by anon.

Author's note: That is my work, I DON'T authorize any plagiarism! | English isn't my first language, so I'm sorry if there's any grammar error.

༻✦༺ 　༻✧༺　༻✦༺

Chris's large hands worked on gripping Y/N's hips, roughly turning the position of her body - which had previously been on her stomach - so that she was facing the ceiling.

Automatically, the girl planted the soles of her feet on the mattress, a surprised squeal escaping her lips when she felt Chris's rough gestures against her body.

The boy quickly pressed the inside of her knees, spreading her legs roughly so that her glistering cunt was exposed, his mouth watering at the sight.

"Y' gonna be good f' me and be still while I fuck you, babe?" Chris's voice was hoarse. He knelt on the mattress, placing himself between her thighs, his hands snaking from her knees to her calves, pushing her legs up.

"Yeah, so good." Y/N whined, clutching the crumpled sheet between her fingers tightly. Her teeth gripped her bottom lip in a death grip, trying to contain her moans in anticipation of something that hadn't even happened yet.

A dirty smirk spread across Chris's face, his right hand firmly gripping his cock and pumping it a few times, spreading the remains of Y/N's wetness that were still on it, a shiver spreading through his body with the feeling.

Chris leans his upper body over his girl's, supporting all his weight on his left arm. His blue deathly eyes looked deeply into Y/N's beneath him, keeping his pupils focused on her expressions as he aligned his dick in her pussy, slowly penetrating the hole that was already suitable for his size, eliciting a loud and surprised moan from Y/N, who let her bottom lip slip out of its prison, her jaw dropping and mouth forming a perfect O.

Chris's tongue escapes his own lips, wetting them. His right hand traveled upward, caging her head between his hands, holding himself up as his biceps flexed and extended, droplets of sweat beginning to appear on his skin.

The boy maintained a slow and rhythmic rhythm with his hips, it was slow, sensual and full of desire; the tip of his cock teasing Y/N's deepest, most sensitive spot, eliciting slurred moans from her lips, her body squirming as a result, practically begging itself for more, faster, and deeper.

"I told you to stay still. Can’t follow simple directions, babe? Too drunk with my cock to understand anything?"

"M' sorry." Y/N moaned, her eyes rolling back as her legs quiveved in the air when Chris' head pressed for long seconds on her G-spot.

Chris looks down between their bodies, his pupils dilating while watching his cock disappear into his girl's hungry pussy, her hips and waist moving against the mattress as little "pleases" escape her lips, not obeying his previous order.

"You..." The boy began, his teeth gritted as he lifted his head, returning his eyes to hers. "Have a little problem with control, huh?"

"Chris, p-please." Her voice sounded as desperate as ever before, eyes filling with tears as little whimpers escaped her lips.

"M' gonna have to teach y' a lesson. So pathetic f' my cock." Chris rasped, feeling her walls squeeze around him in an addictive way. "Gonna have to learn how to be a good girl, huh?"

And when Y/N least expected it, Chris released his whole weight onto her body.

He palms her thighs, hiking them around his waist, while his chest presses against hers firmly, preventing her from moving even an inch. Her boobs were practically being crushed by him as her nipples were stimulated against his skin with each thrust.

His hands flew to above her head, touching the wood of the headboard, and laying his own head on her right shoulder as he continued fucking her at a pace that made Y/N see stars.

The room around the two seemed to melt away, a large fog surrounding the bed as their gasps and moans echoed through the four walls.

The position made Chris go as deep as he had ever gone before; Y/N felt as if her walls could feel every vein of his cock scrape through them mercilessly, his swollen head expanding the way with each thrust, pressing against her magic spot again and again. His pelvis put almost imperceptible but extremely delicious pressure on her clit with each thrust, massaging it.

"Oh, fuck, fuck, fuck." Y/N rolled her eyes so hard that she swore they could pop out of their sockets, closing it tightly. Her nostrils were flared while her red, swollen lips were open, sinful sounds escaping through them.

"Keep your eyes open. Look at me, baby." Chris muttered against her slippery skin. She whimpered loudly, opening her eyes with difficulty, focusing them on Chris. "Want to see your pretty face, hm?"

The boy was as messy as she was, his tangled hair stuck to the sweaty skin of his forehead. His pupils were so dilated that it was almost impossible to see the blue ocean behind them. His lips were a beautiful shade of pink, so kissable.

"Such a good girl f’ me." He kisses her cheeks messily, their faces moving against each other with his movements. "All still beneath me, 'had to put all my weight on you, huh? To make your pretty little body stop squirming s' much, all because of your obsession with m' dick."

"Oh God- Fuck, Chris, p-ple- Oh." Y/N moaned incoherently, her eyes only half-opened due to the force she was using not to close them, still fixed on his face.

She felt all the dirtiest sensations coming from her pussy, internal shivers rising from her G-spot to her stomach, ripping goosebumps from her body.

"What, babe? Y' gonna cum, is that it?" Chris scoffed, his own eyes rolling back momentarily as Y/N's walls squeezed him for seconds longer than before, a gasp escaping his lips. "Oh- Can feel you squeezing around me. S' tight, babe." His warm tongue escaped his lips, licking the corner of Y/N's mouth, tasting her saliva mixed with her sweat.

"P-please Chris, I n-need it s' bad."

Chris ran his left hand down between their bodies, pressing the tip of his middle and ring fingers over her clit just the right amount.

"Make a pretty mess on m' cock, angel." The brunette commanded, trapping Y/N's lower lip between his teeth, sucking on the swollen flesh as his ears were filled with the dirtiest sounds that escaped her throat as she came.

Y/N's walls held his dick in place for long seconds, her body spasming hard beneath his own, only her legs shaking visibly as her upper body was still pressed between the mattress and his chest.

"Feel s' good, sweetheart." Chris groaned, letting go of her bottom lip but keeping his lips against hers, his mouth falling open as his eyes rolled back.

His hand that was still above her head gripped the edge of the mattress in a death grip, his knuckles turning white almost instantly as they banged against the wood of the headboard from his fast movements. His arm shook slightly as his legs spasmed over hers.

Hot, milky jets escaped from his pink head, hitting the bottom of her pussy, making a delicious mess with her own cum.

"Fuck, I'm obsessed with this feeling." The boy gasped as he finally felt the sensations of his orgasm start to subside.

His blue eyes met Y/N's face, taking note of her own closed eyes as her teeth held her bottom lip weakly - the thin skin of it almost bruised from Chris' previous grip.

He knew she was still savoring the sensations of her own orgasm. The boy used his hands to lift his upper body off hers, relieving the pressure of his weight and receiving a small sigh in response.

Chris brought his face closer to her right shoulder, sealing his lips in wet, open-mouthed kisses over her warm skin, traveling from one shoulder to the other and up her neck slowly, until he reached her mouth, where he loosened her grip on her lip with his own, bringing her into a slow, loving kiss full of tongue and saliva.

The boy pulled away a few seconds later, feeling the tightness of her walls lessen around his cock, which was slowly becoming flaccid. He lifted his upper body, pulling out of her slowly, his eyes fixed on where they were connected.

Y/N moaned in surprise as she felt Chris insert his thumb inside her sensitive hole, pushing his cum back inside and keeping it there, deep. A satisfied grin grew on his face as he saw her walls contract around nothing when he pulled his finger out, his cum remaining trapped inside her.

Chris caressed her ankle lightly, kissing the side of her knee slowly.

"We can't waste anything, petal."

༻✦༺ 　༻✧༺　༻✦༺

My asks are always open. My requests are closed at the moment since I have many to work in, but you can always send questions or simply talk to me 🩷💋

And remember to treat people with kindness always!

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[dumplingsfordays]

tutoring sessions

Dan Heng x fem!reader

genre - smut

summary - your tutor (and friend) gets a little hot under the collar after you tease him, and things escalate a little (by a little I mean a lot).

cw!: nsfw (sexual themes), friends to (implied) partners, oral (dan heng receiving), praise, virgin!reader, virgin!dan heng, all characters 18+, kinda subby dan heng (he's also very vocal hehe), voyeurism kinda, reader is referred to as 'good/pretty girl' but that's really it for gendered language, implied that dan heng's still v thirsty for reader once the fic ends 👀

note - this is my first smut fic so I'm sorry if this is badly written 😭😭 dan heng might be a little ooc but I'll just roll w it... I was working on a fluff version of this but I accidentally posted the draft and I couldn't un-post it so I'm crying rn it was so long too-

and as always, thank you for reading :)

˗ˏˋ ★ ˎˊ˗

"And today's topic..." the raven-haired man flips to a page in the calculus textbook that he's holding, "is mathematical induction."

"That sounds super hard!" you sigh playfully. "Can we please do something else?"

"Sum and product identities?"

"No!"

"How about-" he flips further, "-sigma notation?"

"Also sounds super hard."

"But it isn't."

"You say that everytime!"

"We do have to start somewhere, though," he remarks with a small smile.

For a split second, you remember where this whole thing actually started. Ah yes, your room, six months ago... when your parents hired him and you came downstairs to find a complete stranger your age sitting at the dinner table. You remember being confused about what classes you shared with him - he did seem familiar in a way, so you just assumed that you had some shared classes. Back then, he was very quiet, very low-profile, and look at him now! Talkative, compassionate, cheeky (only sometimes), kind... if you really excelled in English class, then you might've called him a bloomed flower or something else of the sort. He looks so different now, though - you don't know if it's the chill of the night air that's trickling through the open window by your desk, or the soft, mellow glow of the fairy lights strung up around your room, or if it's just your stupidly big crush on him... it's probably the latter, now that you think about it.

"Well, I don't want to start anything." You lean back in your chair and close your eyes, relishing in the way that you can practically feel his mock-disappointed gaze on you.

"I guess we'll end the sessions here then," he sighs. You weren't sure if he was kidding or not - something about his tone hinted that he wasn't, so, not really thinking it through, you spring back forward to the table and cup your face in your hands with your elbows on your desk. You look up at him in desperation.

"There's no need to do that," you pout, "I just don't feel like doing anything, you know?"

"Come on, let's just finish at least one lesson today," Dan Heng urges, leaning in a little as he does. He smiles encouragingly and pats your back, but you're still not planning on giving in to the agony of work.

"Why do we have to do that, though?" you whine, now folding your arms on your desk and laying your head down on them. It's now his turn to lean back in his chair.

"Okay, so what are you lacking in right now?" he asks, running a hand through his hair to get some wild strands out of his eyes. "Why don't you want to do anything today?" You hate yourself for the fact that you felt your face redden at his action.

"Lack motivation, probably," you bury your face in your arms now, trying to hide the prominent blush on your cheeks.

You hear him hum - a low, pleasant sound. "Motivation..."

As you hear seconds tick by on the clock across the room, your heartbeat calms down and just as you're sure that the redness covering your face and the tips of your ears has faded-

"Just be a good girl and if we get through at least one topic tonight, you'll get a reward. Is that good enough motivation for you?"

You tremble at his voice. It's persuasive and smooth and deep and makes something deep inside of your stomach flutter - was he messing with you? Did he know about you having a crush on him and was teasing you?

You tilt your head to look at him and instantly regret it. He's leaning in so much that you can feel small breaths of air escaping him as he breathes, his eyes trained on yours.

Then he leans back again and smiles, still keeping eye contact, while you, wide-eyed, bewildered, gawk at him.

"Just kidding." The audacity to say that! After you thought that he was flirting and actually took it seriously! Oh, you just had to get revenge.

"No, no, I'll do it," you raise your brows in defiance, a cheeky smile dancing on your lips. "I'll be a good girl."

This does him in. Now he's the blubbering fool, mouth opening and closing like a fish's, trying to process what you said. The fact that you could make Dan Heng, the least expressive person you've ever met, turn into a tomato from just a simple sentence was extremely satisfying.

"You don't have to," he stammers. In a few quick movements he's back at the table, arms folded in his lap. You notice that they're not relaxed, no, his hands are balled up into white-knuckled fists - should you really keep on teasing?

Immediately, you decide that yes, you should.

"But I want to."

For a split second you think that you heard something, maybe a faint meow from a stray cat or a little creak of the walls, but then you realize that the sound came from a much closer origin. Dan Heng, at this point, is tense all over - you can see his jaw clench and his fists growing tighter, nails probably leaving small white crescents in his skin. He's doubled over, too, like he has a stomachache. At this, you immediately feel regret, and all the seductiveness and sass from your voice vanishes in an instant, replaced with concern.

"You okay?"

"Yes," he says, still avoiding eye contact, "Yes, I'm good- can I just go to the bathroom for a sec?"

"Are you..?" You trail off, scared to finish your sentence at the possible implications. He swallows thickly and stands up, trying his best to cover his problem with his shirt, and just as he's about to exit your room-

"You can stay, if you want to..."

He slowly turns his head around, totally stunned at your words.

"I mean," you babble nervously, "my parents are still home, and there's a chance that they'll see your- um, friend, and..."

Before you can internally slap yourself for letting your mouth run like a river, he swivels around fully and his hand leaves the doorknob.

"You're sure?" he whispers.

"Only if you are," you reply, looking directly into his eyes, and Dan Heng awkwardly trudges back over to sit beside you on your bed, a blush dusting his face.

"I don't really know how to start," he admits, "I've never really... you know."

"Me neither," you reply with a nervous chuckle, trying to make light of the situation. "I mean, if you're up to it, I guess we can start with, um, kissing, or something..."

As if on cue, he leans towards you, cupping your cheek in his hand, and your eyes close as your lips touch.

It's your first kiss, too, so you don't really have anything to go off of, but this kiss makes your knees weak and you press your hands against his broad chest, seeking stability. He wraps his other hand around your waist at this action and as the kiss deepens, his lips travel down your jaw and to your neck, eventually coming to rest on your collarbone, where he plants another kiss and leans further into your touch.

You, meanwhile, reach for the tent in his sweatpants and start to rub it though the fabric, eliciting a whine from the larger man. He bucks up into your palm, desperate for more friction, and raises his lips to the shell of your ear, whimpering and quietly gasping in overwhelming pleasure. His large hands finally settle on your waist and his fingers dig into your skin as you continue your ministrations and smile into his shoulder.

"Please," he begs softly, "need to feel you 'round me."

He didn't need to tell you twice as you immediately get the hint and drop down to your knees in front of him. You hook a finger over the band of his sweatpants, tugging at it while looking up at Dan Heng with pleading, wide eyes.

He mutters an expletive when he lifts his hips up, cheeks reddening every second that passes, and as the clothes pool around his ankles, you can see the outline of his thick cock through the material of his boxers.

You decide to tease him (again, and you will never get tired of it because his reactions are way too cute to stop) and glide your fingers over the bulge, at which he squirms, but doesn't dare to take his eyes off of yours.

His hips rise again, and another article of clothing is shed, but this time his lower half is completely naked, so you finally get to see what he's been packing in there.

It's gorgeous compared to the ones that you've seen online. It's standing at attention, slightly twitching whenever your hot breath meets the tip. Dan Heng sees your eyes widen and swallows nervously as you subconsciously lick your lips.

"Is it not...?" he trails off, eyebrows furrowed.

You shake your head, still mesmerized. "No, no, it's very pretty."

He whines when you lean closer to it, eventually bringing it to rest against your cheek. You look up at the man as your hand wraps around its base and you hum at how warm it is.

"You ready?" you ask. You're rubbing your thighs together at this point - his half-lidded eyes, red, swollen lips parted in a sigh, and cheeks dusted with pink elicit a reaction from you like no erotic content ever could.

"Yes- yes, (y/n), please, need you so much, please," he gasps desperately, hands reaching to his sides and grabbing the blanket underneath him. You fulfill his request with a light kiss to the red tip of his now-leaking cock (at which a whimper escapes his lips and he almost bucks up) and take it into your mouth.

His long fingers weave through your hair at the back of your head in an attempt to feel more of you - you then moan, sending delicious vibrations to his cock which throbs in appreciation.

"You're s'warm," Dan Heng hisses through his teeth above you, tears about to fall from his watery eyes, "so, so tight, fuck! Such a good girl f'me, yeah-"

You take more of him into your mouth, hollowing your cheeks as his tip hits the back of your throat. Your gag reflex activates and your throat constricts - the raven-haired man above you nearly chokes at the feeling while you drag your lips off of his cock.

"'M sorry," you whisper as you slowly stroke it, feeling it pulse in your soft hands.

"Don't be, that was - ah - felt so good," he pants. "You okay, though?"

"Yeah, 'm all right... can we continue, though?"

"Please."

You stop stroking it and attempt to fit it all in once more, sharp gasps coming from the man above you. You almost reach the base, but his tip prods against the back of your throat so you have no choice but to suck it, bobbing your head up and down on his cock. Rogue specks of your saliva land on it just to pool on your lips as they hungrily come back down his shaft.

He's arching his back from the pleasure, applying a little pressure to your head to guide it in a steady rhythm. His hips start bucking up faster and faster as he gets close to his orgasm - he's shaking his head, screwing shut his eyes as deep, throaty groans are ripped from his chest.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck... doin' so well, pretty girl - ah! - makin' me feel s'good, yeah? 'M gonna cum, baby, just keep - fuck - suckin' me off like that like a good girl, please, fuck, please-"

Eventually he can't take it anymore. His hips are now wildly thrusting up into your mouth, lower abs flexing at the movements, he's panting, drooling, and crying all at the same time - it's so overwhelming and it feels so amazing that he cums with a single, broken moan.

Dan Heng's chest is heaving up and down as he comes down from his high, soothing hand petting your head gently. You attempt to stand, but fail as you topple back onto the ground, laughing.

"Cock so good you can't stand back up?" he teases jokingly, and lends you his hand so he can pull you back up onto the bed.

"Hah, you wish," you smirk back and giggle again. "So, what are we then? Are we still friends, or have we been demoted to student and tutor again?"

His eyes narrow and cloud with lust as an idea pops into his head - you swallow nervously when you meet his darkened gaze. He grabs your wrist and pushes you back, his other hand now greedily kneading your thigh.

"We'll see after I repay you."

#dan heng #dan heng hsr #hsr x you #hsr fanfic #honkai #honkai star rail #dan heng smut #hsr smut #star rail smut #dan heng x reader #dan heng x you #dan heng x y/n #hsr #i really only started to simp for him once his il form came out 🫣 #like pls marry me id do anything

[teyamsatan]

ℂ𝕙𝕒𝕡𝕥𝕖𝕣 𝕍𝕀𝕀: 𝕄𝕒𝕪𝕓𝕖 𝕎𝕖'𝕧𝕖 ℍ𝕒𝕕 𝔼𝕟𝕠𝕦𝕘𝕙

Pairing: Neteyam x (f)Omaticaya!Reader

synopsis: You and Neteyam finally confront each other, after a seven year war that left you broken and bruised.

warnings: 18+ minors DNI, aged-up! Neteyam/Reader, enemies-to-lovers, angst (mentions of violence, battle, blood, death, confrontation, admission of feelings), smut, strong language.

wc: 7k words

a/n: we're almost at the end, besties. i want to say a massive thank you for being patient with me, i have struggled with writer's block for a while now, and my life is incredibly hectic at the moment, but thank you for continuing to inspire me to write this story that has come to mean so much to me :(. i hope you enjoy this chapter, that i once again somehow feel weirdly insecure about hahaha, and i hope you'll find it was worth the wait. also this is only mildly proof read bc i am exhausted and i need to sleep ;((( i'll come back to it in the morning i promise x (also pls someone comment on the fact in the photo vi's looking up and he's looking down cause you know - rise and fall together and all)

pls don't forget to leave a comment or a reblog and tell me your thoughts, i loveee to hear from you so much!

na'vi compendium: txepvi  - spark, oare - moon, nawm - great, syä - bitter, tanhì - bioluminescent freckle, tewng - loincloth, tsakarem - tsa'hik in training, yawne - beloved

: ̗̀➛ previous chapter (x) : ̗̀➛ series masterlist (x) : ̗̀➛ series playlist (x)

I carved my name into your ribcage We talked of lands away from this cage

"Dad always talks about Earth as if it was a dying hole, but... I don't know."

Neteyam's head was positioned snugly in your lap as you both stared intently at the sky, trying to make sense of the shapes of clouds, and the way they passed you by like birds in the night sky, never to be seen again, just a memento of the present and how every moment was unique and precious, and needed to be cherished. You both loved doing that, in between practice sessions, or before, or after, a way to ground you and remind you there's still beauty in this world outside of what you were being taught, of how everything was in preparation for a grisly reality you both struggled to come to terms with.

"Yes?"

"The little videos we've seen, of the movies and shows Norm and Max and the other humans like to watch... and the books they make us read during English lessons and the music... it doesn't seem that bad, you know? It seems they were happy, and... good. It seemed they lived for more than just fighting and greed, more than this."

You thought about it for a while. He was right. Humans were... beautiful, in their own ways. They had love and heart and soul in a way you never thought possible - it seemed there was always beauty to be found even in the darkest of corners, even in the most unsightly of places, and that gave you hope.

"I want to be more than this, too."

Your eyes snapped from the sky to him, and his eyes met yours, boring into you with a vehemence that almost scared you. When he rose from his spot, he faced you, his face so close to yours you could feel his breath fanning over you, and your heart stumbled in your chest at the proximity and the way his smile always managed to take your breath away.

"I want to know more than this. I will learn, and I will work hard, and I will fight, but Vi, one day, you and me, we'll be free of this. Free to do whatever we want, free to spend our days like the humans in the movies, just happy and ourselves. Wouldn't you like that?"

"Yes. I'd like that."

You said, don't fret love, someday I'll be my own man, I'll be free Oh, but darling, did you mean Darling, did you mean free from me?

“O’i’en…” your voice was hoarse and barely there, a croaking whisper you hardly recognised as your own, but still there. You were still here, and at least for that, you were grateful. Because there was more to your life. So much more you wanted to do and see, so much you felt you were made for and deserved, so much you still have to repent and atone for. Your mind was scrambled with visions of your past, so many of them you’ve lost count, the continuous onslaught barely ceasing as you woke, and you still felt like in a liminal state of being, not quite dead, but not quite alive, either. In those dreams, images of your old Neteyam were intertwined with his face now, much colder, much wiser, somehow even more beautiful, and confessions of “I love you” mingled with hushed whispers of “why is she not awake yet?” and commotion beyond your understanding. You needed answers. The battle, that now felt like a lifetime away to you, also somehow felt like it had just finished, and you rose from your spot with only one thought in mind: Oare was hurt. She was shot, and you needed to find her. 

You wondered if it was fate, or Eywa's doing, that O'i'en was the first person you ran into, even as you were trying to avoid any semblance of another soul, the guilt and sadness mingling in you with flashes of worst-case scenarios, ones in which your distracted mind led to deaths that you will forever carry on your shoulders, that you will forever blame yourself for, that you were sure other people would, too, ones which you were too scared to prove and too spent to disprove, so you settled for ignorance and denial, at least until you found your ikran.

"Oh, Eywa, you're alive!" you were taken aback by his surprise, and by his pure, unadulterated relief and happiness as his eyes found your form, limping and bruised, with bloodied and torn garments and yet still... alive. You didn’t think O’i’en would ever want to see you again, much less acknowledge you or talk to you, but here he was, running, as much as he could, the gash in his leg preventing him from any true momentum, but still, he ran to you and enveloped you in a big hug, that you couldn’t help but reciprocate, melting into his all-too-familiar touch that’s always felt comforting and safe, and never bruising or cold.

You sighed as your mind, much as it always did, brought to its forefront another face, another body, another man that never ceased to pull you out of the moment and into whatever fantasy your mind concocted to replace reality with. As you tightened your arms around him, your palms flat against his back, you noticed your fingers being coated in warm liquid, and the feel of it, as well as the smell of metal that hit you immediately after, made you gasp and break the embrace, using whatever force you had to turn him around and inspect the wound you knew had to be bad enough, if so much blood was pouring out of it, but still couldn’t help be shocked when you were proven right. 

“Fuck, your back…”

“I know… I haven’t had the chance to go see the healers yet.” 

“You haven’t ha- are you serious right now? Come, let’s go now.” You almost forgot about the your plan to avoid people, too concerned for the ugly looking gash pulsating blood that trickled down his toned back, until it soaked in his soiled tewng. He didn’t let you move him, instead taking your wrists in his hand and holding you still. 

“You look like you’re about to collapse, how are you still so bossy? Besides… there’s people who need it more than me.” The purple twinge in his cheeks let you know this wasn’t quite the truth. Not the whole truth. O’i’en was the most selfless person you’ve ever met, and yet, this wasn’t the whole truth. You looked tired and broken, scared and forlorn, and yet, with all your might, you tried to contort your face into something you hoped resembled the way Jake would raise the hairs above his eyes in a clearly disapproving expression, and while you lacked the most important aspect of that whole stare, it clearly worked, because he winced and broke the look you shared, choosing a spot on the ground instead. 

“After… everything, I just didn’t know if I could…or should… go get help from the Tsa’hik. It feels like everywhere I look, you follow. I knew you were hurt as well, and I didn’t know if I could handle seeing you like that, or seeing you at all. But now that you’re here, I realise… I’m just happy you’re alive.”

You smiled, a small feat that felt like the hardest task you’ve ever been assigned, but still, you were glad to know there was still something salvageable about your relationship with the man you once thought you’d spent the rest of your life with. 

“Come, sit. I’ll clean the wound myself.”

“You shouldn’t-“ He stopped when he noticed your look. You were too tired to be trifled with, and he was smart enough to know that. 

You promised home, the kind I'd never known But here we are, skin and flesh and beating hearts And I'm wondering what the hell I'm doing wrong

You worked in silence, as much as you could, the thoughts spiralling in your head, worse with each passing second, and although you didn’t want to ask, you knew you couldn’t avoid it any longer, not when he looked so sad and despondent, not when the gash in his back spoke to a battle fiercer than you wanted to picture, not when you couldn’t help wonder if it was all on you. With a sigh, you spoke, and watched as he went rigid with every word uttered.

“What happened, O’i’en?” 

“What do you remember?”

“Nothing. I remember falling… i remember Oare getting shot.” You wince at the memory, at how it was your unsteady, tired, distracted mind that made her a vulnerable target. 

“Nothing else.”

O'i'en's whole body stiffened, and your hand stilled midair, shivers pulsating in your body as dread enveloped it.

“What. Happened. O’i’en?” 

"After you fell... the battle... took a turn for the worse. A lot of Na'vi died, a lot of our mounts died, too..."

"The Olo'eyktan and Tsakarem tried their best, we all did, but without you and Neteyam..."

The guilt that was big enough to almost crumble you into a mess of sobs and broken shards on the ground dulled just for a moment while his words rang in your ears, echoing until they clicked, until you made sense of their meaning.

"Neteyam...? Where was Neteyam, why wasn't he fighting?"

His body turns to face you again, his barely patched-up wound forgotten in the moment that felt ever-lasting, but not like how time stands still as you're enveloped in a kiss, but like a nightmare you can't escape from, where a moment lasts hours, where every scream is expelled in slow-motion and the monsters get closer and closer with each breath that gets lodged in your dry, hoarse throat.

"He tried to catch you, but couldn't. I think he took you back to the village. He didn't return after. They say..."

"They say he hasn't left your tent since. We've all been working, trying to get everyone back, ready for the funeral, but he... he never left the Tsa'hik's tent."

"You're wrong." What he was saying made no sense. Neteyam has done nothing but wish for your demise ever since you were both nothing more than mere children. His hatred never diminished through time, and neither did yours. You both despised each other more and more each day, with every year passed, with every instance in which neither of you relented or found it in you to be better and take the high road. This whole ordeal, this whole nightmare that only started when you woke up, it was his fault. The fact that so many people died, that you were in this state, that Oare.... fuck. Oare.

“Where are you going? You need to take it easy.” 

“I need to find her. I need to make sure she’s ok, she’s probably in pain and suffering and I should be the-“

You stop when you notice his grieving grimace, his eyes fixed on the ground, tears falling at his feet, that you followed from his eyes to their demise as they splattered on the ground, the droplets hitting your ankles in the process. 

“No.” 

Silence. Dead silence. Death silence. Silence that you couldn’t help fill with a crescendo of denial, louder and higher pitched with every new attempt. 

“No, please. Tell me you’re wrong.” 

“I saw her… in the lineup.”

“The lineup?” 

“Of all the dead… dead animals and na’vi. So many of them, i lost count. She was there… I’m so sorry.” 

Your tears mingled with his own as they collapsed on your feet and on the grass, and you forgot for a second of your rule - no crying in front of people. You forgot this as you forgot everything else, even your own name pushed from your memory as it was flooded instead with images of her, of your sister, that you loved so much, that you cherished deeply, that you thought you’d be able to for the rest of your life, that you were now told was gone, taken from you, in spite of you… because of you.

“No…Oare, no…”

“She’s with Eywa now… I’m so sorry.”

You said, "Let's make ourselves our very own brigade, this love our shield, our blade" Oh, but darling do you see the cuts from which I bleed? It's me you've slain

"Have you seen her? Have you seen syä?"

"What do you mean, Lo'ak?"

"She's gone, bro. She's not in grandmother's tent anymore."

Neteyam felt the blood drain from his face and settle at the soles of his feet, trickling through and into the ground, until he was so empty he felt faint, he felt like he would never be the same again. So many emotions tried him, from ecstatic relief that he couldn’t even explain to himself, at the fact that you were awake, and well enough to walk, to paralysing fear that overwhelmed him, at the fact you were out in your state, that you were gone Eywa knows where, at the fact he’s now going to have to face you and talk to you.

Too many things have changed in such a short amount of time, so many things he couldn’t make sense of or understand, too many revelations and the possibility of more, of the truth, that Neteyam dreaded. A lose-lose situation, his dad would call it - either he confronted you and you told him his father misunderstood, that it wasn’t true, that you too loved him the way he loved you, which meant the last seven years of both your lives, everything you have put each other through would have been for nothing, or his father was right, and having a confirmation of your lack of feelings, which is what he thought fuelled your actions all these years, which was a truth he avoided knowing for a fact for so long, and that might be too hard to bear after all.

“We have to find her, grandma said she shouldn’t be walking around.”

“I know where she is.”

He’s always known where you were when you wanted to be alone. He’s always known because it’s a place that used to be his, his secret spot, his uncharted paradise. A place that he showed to you when you were both children, and that became a safe heaven for the both of you in time, that you took from him after your unfortunate fallout. Just one more thing you ended up taking from him in time. He couldn’t have returned to this place anyway, not with all the memories of you that plagued it, that might as well have been enclosed in a room stuck in a past that he never wanted to revisit. 

It took him no time at all to find you, his mind disassociating from the walk, until it was like he blinked and he was there, in the clearing that he dreaded coming to, where the last time he came, he took it too far, the memory of the words that you spat at each other, the way his anger physically manifested itself for the first time in his life, the way he lost control of his emotions and his temper, it was all so ugly and unsightly, it hurt him even thinking about it.

Your back was turned to him as you lay on the edge of the lake, one leg dangling mindlessly in the water, and Neteyam’s heart dropped to his stomach at the sight of you - your hunched shoulders, so far removed from the awe-inspiring, empowered stance you normally displayed to people. Your tail was thrashing furiously from side to side, ears pushed flat against your head that rested on your bent knee, braided hair tousled and unkept as it fell over your face, shielding you from view. Neteyam didn’t even know whether he should speak - if there was still a voice in his throat that could push sounds out, and as he tried, he heard nothing, the only sound in his ears one of muffled, panted breaths and thunderous, erratic heartbeats, that somehow drowned everything else out. 

"Leave."

Neteyam ignored your words, all of his senses focused on your voice, on the sniffles that accompanied it, and what they represented. Neteyam has seen you cry only a couple times in all the time he's known you, and not once since your fallout. He was sure you would have rather swallowed a poisoned knife's blade than show weakness in front of him. He gulped audibly when he realised that if you did, that means you knew... if you did, there was no escaping the wrath that was currently embedded in your soul, that he wasn't sure would ever leave you again.

“Why are you here? You should be resting.”

He heard you scoff, bitterness laced through your voice that normally was sweet as a yovo fruit on a summer day, that now felt spoilt, like it had been left rotting on the ground, with no one the wiser.

“Since when do you care about my wellbeing, huh? Last thing I knew I could be dead in a ditch and you’d probably throw a party and dance over my grave. Leave me be, I don't want to deal with you right now.” 

"Txepvi... Just co-"

"Don't you dare call me that. You have long forsaken the right to call me that. Just fucking leave, Neteyam."

He felt anger pricking at him like a dagger he was all too familiar with, that was dull and middling, but whose sting still hurt if pushed into his skin at the correct angle, in the right spot, where he was weak.

"I'm not leaving until you get back to the tent. Tsa'hik's orders." That was a lie, but one he felt at liberty to make, since it was quite certain his grandmother would want you back resting, and not galavanting in the woods, with a wound that almost killed you, that made you easy prey for the apex predators lurking in the thick foliage.

I didn't obliterate these walls for you to come and raid my home And here you are right next to me Ironically, I've never felt more alone

“Why did you stay with me?” 

Whatever anger he had immediately dissipated like droplets water of a hot day, replaced by the same fear that was plaguing him early, that not even the adrenaline coursing through his veins could overpower. What was he supposed to say? It's not like he had an answer to give you - he couldn't even conceptualise it for himself, much less put it into words that would make sense, that would ever satisfy your morbid curiosity.

“Answer me, Neteyam.” 

“I don’t know.” 

You rose from your spot on the edge of the lake, and when you turned to face him and your eyes locked, his breath lodged in his throat. You looked anguished, sadder than he's ever seen you, puffy eyes so red, it scared him, cheeks purple and stained, and swollen, wet lips opened to accommodate the heaved breaths and quiet sobs that you tried your hardest to push down, so that he wouldn't see.

It was too late, now. He could see. He could see it all, and it scared him, what you were doing to him, these feelings that were rushing down with enough force to make him buckle under their weight, just like a waterfall that crashed into the river below, warping it with its power.

“No, we’re not doing this shit anymore. My ikran is dead. People are dead, Neteyam. All because of us, because this stupid war, that you caused. That you started. I’m done with the games, and the mystery, and your stupid mouth staying shut. You don’t know? Figure it out. Now.”

I fell for you faster than I fell apart And I guess I'm the one to blame for letting myself fall too hard

"I don't fucking know, OK? I just needed to - fuck. I needed to make sure you'll live."

"Why?! Why the fuck would you care if I live or die? Why? You haven't cared for more than half our lives, and now, when you would have been more useful on the battlefield, when you could have prevented this mess that you caused to begin with, now you want to play the fucking hero?"

“That I started? Are you hearing yourself right now? I wasn’t the one that pushed, and pushed, and pushed until whatever thread it was that still bound us together turned from wool to steel and snapped, yawne. You made it your life purpose to ruin mine, at every turn, in every way imaginable, for years. I did nothing to you, damn it. I just stopped talking to you. I didn’t hurt you, or purposefully tried to make you ache or suffer, I tried to keep my mouth shut and go about my life, without infringing on yours. I didn’t do anything to hurt you, for fuck’s sa-“

“You keeping your mouth shut and going about your life as if your life wasn’t impermeably connected to mine was what fucking hurt me, Neteyam! You saying nothing, doing nothing, acting like I didn’t exist, like I was just a toy you outgrew, that was worse than anything I could have ever fucking done to you, don’t you understand that? Do you understand that you abandoned me? Me, Neteyam, the person who was always there for you, the person who always had your back. Your best friend, your confidant, your training buddy, your sister. I was everything to you, and you just acted like that meant nothing at all."

"It meant everything! And my father fucking ruined it, and you ruined it. You ruined it, and I'll never, ever forgive you." the intensity behind his eyes, glistening with unshed tears that reflected the rays of the sun hitting his golden irises, the ones that put stars to shame and brought you to your knees, scared you. You came here to cry, and let it out. You came here to mourn. You didn't expect this. Didn't want this. But, for the first time in years, Neteyam was talking to you. Neteyam was telling you truths buried deep within his soul, deep behind walls you've tried to climb and pierce through longer than you wanted to admit to, and given the little crack of light you saw shine through, you knew you couldn't let this opportunity pass you by.

"What do you mean?"

He looked tired, you realised faintly. It was true... he did stay with you. His face was sunken and caved in, dark purple bags under his eyes, and you traced the tears that brightened his tanhì momentarily, as they caressed his skin, before falling down his neck.

"Tell me it's not true, what you said to him all those years ago. Tell me he didn't hear you right. That he misunderstood."

"Who?"

"My dad. I heard him... telling my grandmother that you'd never want to mate with me. Or be Tsa'hik. He said you said that. Tell me he was wrong. Tell me I was wrong for believing him. Tell me I was an idiot for not coming to you sooner, for shutting you out of my life. For letting this break me. Please."

Shock stilled you in your spot, replacing blood with current that electrified every ounce of your being. What? After all this time, so much time that kids were born and grew up, time in which you watched Tuk go from barely a babe to a bright-eyed, bushy-tailed, beautiful girl, time in which you gained and lost your ikran, in which you gained a family and lost the future you thought you were always made for, next to the person you thought you'd always have your back... so much time has passed, and to hear it, the reason, was so unbelievable it didn't feel like it was real. You thought about the conversation that he was referring to, that you had with Jake in what feels like a completely life to the one you were currently living. He did ask you, and you did say...

"He wasn't wrong."

I ripped my heart out and put it in your hands in hopes that we'd put up a fight How paradoxical, since now all I can think about is when will we stop trying

You watched as the intensity on his face was decimated in an instant, his eyes blank and distant as all life seemed to drain from them as you spoke words that you spat without truly even thinking about it. Oare's death, still so fresh in your mind, hurt so much, made every fibre of your being scream in agony, and this new revelation, of the reason of her death being attributed to something you said as a little kid in passing, that he overheard and never bothered to fact-check, made what little sanity you had left to evaporate and what remained was a bitter precipitate of fury and pain, that you wanted him to feel, that you needed to inflict.

"This is why Oare's dead? This is why so many people are dead, because of one comment I made to your father seven years ago in passing? Are you fucking kidding me?"

Your teeth were bared as you spoke, and the emptiness behind his eyes was replaced with furious anger as he listened, as he realised you had no intention of putting his mind or heart at ease, as you realised he didn't deserve it. Not after everything that's happened, not after the way your soul crashed and imploded inside your body at the guilt that ate you alive, that churned and ground your bones into fine dust, guilt that will never, ever leave you.

“I was just a fucking child, don’t you understand that? Do you understand how insane it is to punish me for something that happened when I was just twelve years old?!"

“Well, you know what? I was also just twelve years old! And I loved you, Vi.” The break in his voice hurt you, like a shard of glass plunged in the soft of your skin, and you looked down to try to see if blood was coming out of the wound that wasn't there. There was nothing. Just emptiness, like the vast chasm that separated you, that always will, no matter the fact he was so close to you, you could feel his breath over your face, your scent in your nostrils, his glistening eyes big as planets, eyes you could get lost in easily, you could fall into as easily as falling asleep.

Seeing the unshed tears once more made tears gather in your own. The nickname, that you haven’t heard in all these years, that felt like a relic from a life long forgotten, long forsaken, knocked the air out of you, just as much as his vulnerability, that you weren’t used to seeing anymore did.

“I fucking loved you. You were everything to me. And you broke me.” 

“I had to watch you prove me right every day of my life. Watched as you fought every day to push me away from my own family, and my own dad, who obviously always found you better than me. Watched as you moved on, with no issue, and dated Na’vi after Na’vi, letting them touch you and kiss you, knowing I could see it, in practice, where I always was, I- “

“You fucking did the same thing! You pushed me away, you never talked to me. You abandoned me, without as much as a goodbye. Without any explanation. You fucked girls anywhere I could see, behind my tent, so I could hear you. You chose them all so they bore no resemblance to me, so I could know how much you hated me, every time I saw their faces. You ruined my relationship with the one person who loved me, who was good for me. You fu-"

All you do is blindside me, it's hard to be brave But when the night cuts into the day, it's your love I crave I must've thanked my lucky stars too much They left me sitting in too much dust

Your sentence was cut short by a pair of lips crashing into yours, soft and desperate, clinging on to you like his fingers were wrapped tightly around your throat, like if letting go was unimaginable, like it was too painful to envision. In your dreams, Neteyam's lips were bruising and calloused and cold, and no matter how fiercely you wanted to protest, no matter how much you hated yourself for it, they were the only lips you ever dreamt about. And yet right now, they were nothing like you imagined, nothing like you feared, and despite the hurt, and the pain and the anguish and the anger, despite it all, you couldn't help reciprocating, couldn't help the moan the left you as his other hand found your hips, holding you impossibly closer, while your own hands found the back of his neck and his hair, that you tugged on until he growled. When he broke the kiss and looked at you, hunger and ache clear in his bright eyes, that looked more black than yellow as his hand found your jaw, that he lifted to tilt your head back, pushing his thumb past your lips so you'd keep quiet, you let out a small whimper, and watched as his pupils dilated even more, almost overtaking his beautiful, molten irises.

"Just...Stop talking."

His lips found the place on your jaw where his fingers just were, and the feeling of him on you burned like molten lava, and you push your head back, giving him access to all of you. Your mind felt numb - a battle within itself as it was trying to come to terms with all the  crushing emotions that were fighting for dominion over your thoughts and your soul, each one more devastating than the last - from the guilt that you knew would plague you for the rest of your life, that you didn’t think you’d ever be able to overcome, to the grief of losing your spirit sister, to confusion over what you were doing, over wondering if this was a mistake, to the sadness at Neteyam’s confession and the knowledge he loved you, and you pushed him away without meaning to, to earth-shattering anger at the realisation that this whole ordeal started over nothing and could have been solved if he only ever talked to you and finally, to the hatred that still blossomed, even after all this time, and finally, the desire, pure, unadulterated desire to have him, to be owned, to know what it feels like to be wholly his. You didn’t know which one would win, but you could only hope there’ll still be something left of you when the battle found its victor in the midst of all the chaos. 

He was rough as he pushed you until you tipped backwards, but his caress was gentle as he caught you and made sure you weren't hurt as your body hit the damp, soft grass. When he spread your legs and kneeled in between them, you knew you whatever ounce of self-restraint you had was swiftly thrown out the window, and you knew the relief you'd get to feel once he was done with you would be worth the regret in the morning - at least, it felt so right now. His fingers dug into your thighs as they massaged upwards, from your shins to your hips, and when both his thumbs caressed the sensitive spot at the edge of your loincloth, your breath hitched in your throat, silently begging him for more, hoping he wouldn't make you say words out loud you could never take back.

As if he could hear your thoughts, he spoke, his hands stilling on the knot of your tewng.

"Tell me you want this. I need to know you want this, or I stop."

You hissed at him, conflicted beyond words and reason, because no, of course you didn't. But yes, you did. Of course you did.

"I hate you. I fucking hate you, Neteyam."

At your words, his hands dropped from your hips and in an instant, he was on top of you, his gaze stopping the breath in your lungs as he looked at you, his hand gripping your throat once more, the aggressive gesture at odds with the softness in his eyes and the way he was caressing your jaw in barely-there touches with his thumb.

"I hate you more. So much more. I still need an answer, yawne."

You stared daggers at him, and refused to talk, but as you wrapped your fingers around his cummerbund and pulled him in, until his lips met yours in a messy kiss of teeth and tongues, throbbing deep in you at the way he moaned in your mouth, you knew words were meaningless, and words couldn't convey the feelings that tormented you, anyway. You reached for his tewng and masterfully unwrapped it, feeling his cock spring free and slap against your abdomen, and the weight of it made you gasp, a smirk erupting from his face in response.

You needed him. You needed him to numb the pain the he created, that you created, you needed the emptiness that came from being filled to the brim, the fleeting peace that would come with the high that you knew he could provide, because it hurt. It all hurt, and you couldn't stand it. You reached your hand and wrapped your fingers around his length, your slick leaving a wet patch in the fabric, that was increasing in size by the second, just at the thought of how he'd feel stretching you out. He let out a small groan at the way you were caressing him, running your thumb over the slit, smearing the precum that was leaking, that you felt a sudden urge to taste.

"F-fuck!"

"Take off my tewng, Neteyam."

"For once in your life, you will not get to dictate how this goes."

Despite his words, he listened, and you winced at the weight of his body being lifted off you, instantly missing the contact and comfort it provided. But he wasn't gone long, as he removed your clothes, and you tried not too think of how good his gaze felt on you, how empowering the desire in his eyes as he took you in, how he had to lick his lips and swallow audibly, as if he was a starved man in a desert, and you were his fata morgana.

He took no time in attaching himself to you again, the thick head of his cock prodding at your entrance, and the velvety feel of him against your folds involuntarily makes you shut your eyes closed and your head push back, need heightening at the way he starts licking and sucking at your breast, leaving purple marks in the wake of his lips and tongue, that you want on every inch of you, that you wanted to cum on as he made your knees buckle and your vision spot.

His face finds a home in the crook of your neck as he slides inside you, taking his time to feel you, every inch of your walls, as they stretched to accommodate for his size, and it feels so good, too good, his cock in you, his tail around your thigh, his fingers tracing soothing patterns on your skin, or gripping at your waist, his breath on your neck, his teeth sinking in you so he could stop himself from telling you all the confessions bubbling in his chest, all the ways it's all making sense to him now, that he's never hated you, he's just hated not having you, not being able to call you his. Still, as he bottoms out in you, he can't help some of them from spilling out, the dam of his heart slowly coming apart at the seams.

"It had to be someone who had no resemblance to you. It had to, Vi. Don't you understand? Because any time I looked at anyone, I saw you in them. Their eyes, or lips, their tanhì or stripes, even the smallest similarity killed me, reminded me how much I hate you, how much I want to, how much I don't. I've wanted to hate you so much, I tried so hard, but you were in every dream, in every fantasy, you haunted me my whole life."

You did understand. You understood too well. That's why you chose O'i'en. Because he was nothing like the Neteyam you came to know in the years you became an adult. Because his touch was warm and made you feel nothing. Because his eyes bore no resemblance to his, the glimmer of amber nothing like the green flickers that felt like were Eywa's inspiration for the forest that surrounded you; O'i'en's tanhì were scattered like light through the leaves and branches of the trees, unlike Neteyam's, which were like the star dust that created all life in the Universe, that shone brighter than any light post, that shone so brightly, they led you home every night when you were young.

The tears gathered in your eyes as he started a steady pace of his hips, conflicting feelings tugging at the string of your already broken and torn apart heart, whose heart beats felt dragging and echoing, different to the two sounds you were used to, instead pulsating three syllables throughout your whole body, enveloping you and taking over your mind, forcing you to come to terms with issues you thought you buried so deeply, you'd never have to see again.

I hate you. I love you. I hate you. I love you. I hate you, I hate you....

I love you.

"Neteyam..."

"I know. You're doing so well for me. So well. Fuck, you feel so, so good."

You moan at his words, the desire bubbling inside of you quickly reaching heights you wouldn't mind falling from, being pushed from, so you could feel the euphoria that came along with falling, without having to worry about the inevitable crash that would follow, at least not right now.

"I can feel you squeezing me. Come for me, yawne. I need to feel you come all over my cock."

For the first time since he's called you that, the term of endearment didn't feel ironic or facetious, and for once in your life, you had no problem obeying his orders - when you came, you came violently, legs shaking and back arched, whimpers and moans pushing past your lips unrestrained, and the sounds made his cock twitch inside of you, his own orgasm so close he could taste it. He lets you ride your high fully before pulling out of you, thick ropes of iridescent cum painting your abdomen and chest, that, in your fucked out mind, you almost wish painted your still-throbbing walls instead.

You know all my dreams, you were one, so it seemed And I love you but with you, it's heartache I breathe You gave it your all, just with everything you took from me

It was almost... domestic, the way he was asleep peacefully next to you, his breath so steady and deep, and so relaxed, it almost sounded like purring, his strong, muscular arms holding you close as you lay on your back, looking at the stars, bright, blurry orbs through the distorted lens of your tears, that couldn't stop falling, no matter how much you willed them away. The crash did come eventually, in the few hours since, and it felt like it broke all your bones in the process.

"You and me, we're meant to rise and fall together."

Those words, that became the overarching theme of your relationship, words that you never realised when you spoke them as a child that you would both take so literally, rang in your ears like a broken record your mind could no longer turn off. You were right, all those years ago. Even back then, you knew. You and Neteyam did rise together. From children to adults, from pupils to teachers, from toy soldiers to hardened warriors, rose you did, until you were so high up, the air was thin and suffocating. But nothing compared to your penchant for falling. You fell hard, from grace, from cloud nine, for the other's other schemes and plots, for your own compulsions, obsessions and greedy desires, and mostly, for each other. Your relationship was fire and ice, it was everything and nothing all at once, a war you fought and a war you lost, a war in which innocents had to die and lives were lost, a war you were finally tired of.

You and Neteyam rose and fell together, over and over again, your whole lives. A twisted carousel that wouldn't stop until one of you jumped off it, and with Oare's death, and the shame that followed it, you finally realised it had to be you.

In the early hours of the morning, after a quick wash in the cold lake, you found your way back to the village and straight to the Tsa'hik's tent. You were happy to see her, and nervous to talk, but you knew the quicker you got it out, the quicker it would be over. So with a deep breath, you spoke your piece, and hoped she'd listen.

“Ma Tsa’hik. I’m here to ask you to let me out of this arrangement. Please. I can’t do this, not with Neteyam. I’m done.”

Oh, my love Is this the end for us? Maybe we've had enough

taglist: @fanboyluvr @theycallmesia @afro-hispwriter @soleilmoon @crazy4books1 @bakugouswaif@randxmthxughts @xreadersstuff @sirezaya @kimberlyshailany-blog @gyuventure @jujudsmyst @kikookii @nxptury @nonniesworld @koing-slvt @bakugouswaif @isnt-itstrange @tpwkforevermore @alahamums @tallulah477 @gknj9495@aquamarine001 @itssomeonereading @yumimak@sweetbread-m@eqgroil @im-in-a-pansexual-panik @juneonhoth @yagirlheree @jackiehollanderr @legendarynoodlebowl @iameatingmyhair @justasimps-blog@hannabanana-09 @xylianasblog @misscaller06 @yeosxxx @myh3artttt @teyamsbitch@musicownsme @i-live-in-a-fantasy-daydream @zoetrope1997 @itsmy-alteregohere @ntymavtr @curlszx88 @maki-z @riatesullironalite @baahsaama @luna-salem @teyamtesuli @koing-slvt @call-me-doll-face @puresirius-things @saturniac @call-me-doll-face @dreaming-of-the-reality @whorefortim

(sorry if i missed anyone this list is getting so longgg)

#༊*·˚ andra's works #neteyam #neteyam x reader #neteyam fanfic #neteyam reader #neteyam sully #avatar #avatar twow #avatar fanfic #neteyam x avatar!reader #neteyam sully fanfiction #neteyam angst #awow #awow neteyam #sully family x reader #neteyam smut #neteyam x y/n #avatar way of water #neteyam x reader smut #neteyam x you #neteyam fluff #neteyam x reader angst #neteyam x omaticaya!reader #monster in me series #☆ andra's series

[lostfirefly]

Make my coffee sweet and warm, just the way you used to lie in my arms

The idea for this fic came to me when I was sitting in a coffee shop and saw a barista with purple hair. Pain continues leading me to art :) English is not my native language, errors may occur. As always, feel free to share your thoughts :)

Buggy and Fem.Reader - Masterlist is here.

Description: You were sitting in a coffee shop for work. The barista was Buggy.

Warnings: NSFW, MDNI (sorry not sorry).

Words: 1791

Taglist: @gingernut1314, @operationroots

The title is taken from “One Cup of Coffee” by Bob Marley.

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“This latte is disgusting!” You were sitting in the coffee shop with your friend. 

“It could be worse, Y/N.” Your friend said, sipping her espresso.

“Oh, yeah. This’s not coffee, this's some kind of slop.” You opened your laptop and took out a notebook. “So, what do we have with the exhibition. Look, I received some corrections from Mr. Thompson he said Mr. Monkey D. Luffy wants this exposure to stand here in the corner, and this one should be moved here. Do you remember how hysterical he threw the last time that his new exposure was not seen? I can't stand another evening like this.” You added more sugar to the cup. “No, it's impossible to drink. Wait for me, I'll be right there.” 

You slammed your palms on the table and went to the counter. There was no one behind it. 

“Hey, who's making coffee here? Hey?” You knocked on the table. 

"Why are you yelling, sweet cake?!” A tall man with a red nose, blue hair and makeup on his face came swaying from the kitchen. “I have a terrible hangover. What do you want?” 

“At least that explains why we drink disgusting coffee in the morning.” You looked at him, crossing your arms. “Do you even know how to brew it? Or did you take makeup lessons instead of barista courses? Sorry, but your crossed bones on your face and smeared lipstick look much better than the crap you served us in these cups.” 

“Fuck it. Do you have anything substantive to say? I was actually sleeping.” The man scratched his head and poured himself some coffee from the coffee pot. “It's a good coffee. So, do you have any other complaints?” He leaned his elbows on the counter. 

You growled, slammed your palm on the table again and went to your table.

You sat with your friend, discussing the exhibition, when she suddenly received a message.

“Damn, Y/N. This is Thompson. He says there is an urgent order, a certain Mr. Jinbe will be exhibiting in the central gallery. I’ll leave for a couple of hours and come back.”

Your friend packed her things, grabbed her laptop and quickly ran away. The only people left in the coffee shop were you, the clown barista and a couple of customers who came in to take their coffee to go. You carefully watched the barista, who dropped every single item he grabbed in his hands, cursed under his breath and did not behave very kindly with visitors.

The clown made two lavender rafs, practically threw the cups on the counter, took the money, and swore again as the customers left. He muttered something under his breath and headed towards the front door. You watched him out of the corner of your eye. 

“What are you doing?” You asked, watching him change the sign on the door to “closed.” 

“I’m closing the coffee shop, can’t you see it?” He muttered. 

“It's only 8 am.” You answered, looking at your watch. 

“So what? I’m already tired. Why can’t they drink coffee at home?” The clown walked along the counter, turned behind it, and took out a bottle of whiskey.

“Great. The clown locked me in a coffee shop at 8 am, and he is already drinking whiskey.” You smiled and started typing. “Make me more of your disgusting coffee, since I'm stuck with you.” 

He growled in response, rolled his eyes, quickly took a sip of whiskey and began making coffee. At that moment you received a call. 

“What do you mean you won't come back?” You asked in surprise. “Damn. Call me when you're done.” You threw the phone on the table. “Crap.” 

“Bad morning?” The clown asked, pouring coffee into your mug. 

“Not your business!” You barked.

“Easy, sweet cake! Your coffee.” He came over and set you coffee and a plate of eclair. 

“I didn't order this.” You pointed at the eclair. 

“At my expense. To smooth out your morning.” 

“Oh. Thank you.” You pushed the plate towards you. 

He sat down opposite you and took a sip from the bottle. “What are you doing?” He asked, putting his foot on the table. 

You raised an eyebrow. “Working.” 

“I understand that. I mean, what do you do for a living?” 

“Ah, I’m an exhibition coordinator.” You took a sip of your coffee and cleared your throat, “Oh my god. Did you put whiskey in my coffee?” 

“Now it's more fun, right?” He laughed. 

“You're an idiot?” You wiped your mouth with your palm.

“Oh, don't be so boring. What's your name, by the way?”

“What? Shit! Y/N. And your name? The man who pours whiskey into his coffee.” You chuckled. 

“Hi, Y/N. I’m Buggy!”  He held out the bottle to you. You looked at him for a few seconds, then took the mug in your hand and lightly clinked it against the neck of the bottle.

You took a sip of your coffee and took a bite of your eclair. “No, the coffee is disgusting. And with whiskey it got even worse.” 

Buggy took your mug, poured the coffee into the nearby flowers and poured you some whiskey. 

“I can’t drink. I’m working, Buggy!” You looked at him for a while, then pushed the glass closer and took a sip of the whiskey.

“Have a wonderful day at work, baby!” He raised his glass and winked.

He took a sip of whiskey, loudly put the glass on the table, and walked out the door into the kitchen. You were calmly typing the text when you heard a crash from the other room. 

“Hey, you. Buggy. Are you alive?” 

There was no answer. 

You took another sip of whiskey and stared at the door. You took another drink, then got up from your seat and went to the kitchen. 

You carefully looked behind the door. “Is there anyone? Are you alive? I heard a noise.” The sound of swearing reached you. You walked towards Buggy and saw him with a burnt hand.

“What happened?” You asked, approaching him.

“I took out fucking trays with fucking croissants.” 

“Do you have a first aid kit?” You asked, looking at his hand.

Buggy glanced at the box. You took out your bag of medicine and took his hand. 

“What are you doing?” He asked in surprise. 

“I’m treating your hand, idiot. Who goes into the oven without gloves.” 

“Don't touch me!” Buggy tried to pull his hand back, but you held it tightly. 

“No way. I'm stuck here with you, and I can't let the only person with the key lose his arm because of stupid croissants.”

Buggy looked at you with his green eyes, not understanding why you were showing concern. You wrapped his hand in a bandage and gently ran your fingers over his palm. 

“There you go. Just like new, huh?” You smiled and didn’t even realize how you ran your hand through his blue hair. Buggy kept his eyes on you and suddenly took your hand. You ran your fingers over his cheek and chin and didn’t realize how you pressed your lips into his. 

Buggy abruptly wrapped his arms around you, turned you around and sat you on the table.

You took off his shirt and began to unbutton his pants as he ran his lips down your neck. 

“Fuck, I've never done anything like that.” You whispered, taking off your t-shirt. 

“Me too, sweet cake.” Buggy said between kisses. 

“It's your fucking whiskey.” You ran your hands over his biceps.

“Maybe,” Buggy said, taking off his underwear and pants.

“I'll give you a bill for ruining my morning.” You said, pressing your lips against his. You felt his tongue slide between your lips. You moaned through the kiss.

“Oh, Y/N, I’ll pay you right now.” Buggy took off your skirt and underwear. You wrapped your arms and legs around him as you felt him enter you sharply in your aching cunt. 

“Fuck!!” Your skin heated up, the burning sensation flared up. 

Buggy’s lips captured yours greedily. The spark that lighted up you inside made your hips grind and reached up to run your fingers through his long hair. His gripped on your wrist and thigh tightens, pressing your thigh against his as he growls, leaking desire and sex.

“Oh, shit. So good!” You felt his teeth nipping your lips, his hand squeezed your ass and the other touched your nipples.

Buggy gripped your ass tightly, putting cock deeper in your cunt. “Fuck, Y/N. You’re amazing.”

“Don’t stop, please!” You whispered. 

The kitchen table shook from the force of him, bowls and utensils fell off the table. You threw your head back, and Buggy used the opportunity to mark your shoulders with his lipstick traces, growling, grunting, hearing your moans. 

“So good, Buggy. Just fuck me.” Your hands hooked against his back. That was all new. New sensations from the way a strange clown barista fucks you.

As you clung to him and move closer to him, you moaned against his lips as his pace quickens.

“You like that, Y/N?” He thrusts wildly, your name moaning on his lips as his arms tighten around you. Cunt tight around his cock as he hammered against your cervix, he loved the feeling of you.

“Fuck, Buggy!” You moaned his name loudly, your eyes rolled, it was hard for you to focus on anything else, only on his cock fucking you senseless. 

Your legs trembling as they tighten around his waist, your body shaking against him, nails digging hard. Your cunt clenches around Buggy's cock, feeling every curve, every vein as he fucks you harder, when you are arching your back. His lips on your neck, growling loudly and grunting with every thrust.

“Scream for me, my sweet cake.” Buggy whispered in your ear. 

And you cried out, the pleasure still comes as he fucked you. Ecstasy flew through your veins, each touch scalding you. His cock insulted your insides and your body shook and convulsed, completely overwhelmed by his power.

Buggy kissed your cheek, sighing, grunting, growling, praising your body with every hammering thrust. His hips moved faster, stuttering, your body almost completely limp in his arms except for yours still tightly gripping his shoulders and clawing.

Buggy’s thrusts became harsh, his hands squeezed your body tightly, his breathing became ragged and raspy between moans. His rough breaths, rumbling moans as he threw his head back, when he came.

Both panting against each other, pressing themselves against each other, Buggy pressed his cheek against yours, inhaling deeply to take in your scent.

“The sex was amazing, Buggy. But the coffee is still crap.” You said and kissed him on the lips.

#one piece #buggy the clown #buggy live action #one piece live action #buggy one piece #opla buggy the clown #buggy fanfiction #buggy fic #opla buggy the clown x reader #buggy the clown x reader #opla buggy the clown x you #buggy x female reader #buggy the clown x you #opla buggy x reader #buggy x you #buggy x reader #buggy smut

[shu-box-puns]

Leaning to put on an exopack

'You lose that mask, you’re unconscious in twenty seconds, you’re dead in four minutes.'

More of my Dad!Tsu'tey and Spider brain rot.

Right so when the school was still an active thing and before Sylwanin died, Tsu'tey attended with the other children. He was one of Grace's best students. Incredibly bright and eager to learn. Very competitive with Neytiri to see who could learn the most English words in the least amount of time.

Tsu'tey was not part of the group that set the bulldozer on fire. He wasn't even in school that day since his father had taken him and his brother out on a hunt for the day. By some dumb luck, he missed the entire situation.

The school got closed down. Sylwanin died of her wounds. And the Omaticaya learnt all they needed to about the Sky People.

But Tsu’tey wasn't done. He noticed that Grace's demon body often visited the school. She tidied the learning resources and swept the leaves.

He approached her on impulse one day, intending to chase her off but instead growing curious.

He demanded she teach him about the breathing masks the Sky People wore. How to disable them, how they worked. Anything he could use to his advantage should they turn their attention on HomeTree.

Grace had agreed easily enough. Tsu'tey assumed it was her love of teaching that convinced her, but he had a sneaking suspision she had simply had a soft spot for him.

She had turned to one of the cupboards facing the far wall, mercilessly untouched by bullet wounds, and began pulling out various exopacks for him to practice on.

If she was disturbed by his reasonings, she didn't show it as she cleared one of the tables and began setting the spare exopacks down. She turned away again, ducking down to drag out a human-sized silicone dummy for him to practise disarming. 

The exopacks turned out to be easy to break. All he had to do was break the glass front covering the face or slash the breathing tube that connected the face to the small pack that typically hung from a belt or was attached to a backpack.

He found them incredibly bothersome. 

"Very good." Grace complimented, and Tsu’tey returned his gaze to her. He recognised the challenge in her tone. Similar to how she used to goad him into pushing himself further during English lessons. His head tilted in silent question and the corner of her mouth quirked upwards. "Can you take them off without destroying them?"

He scoffed. Of course he could.

And then he attempted to do so and failed miserably.

Tsu'tey quickly discovered that the straps that secured the mask to the back of the skull were too small for his fingers and he often ended up tearing them clean off by accident. The valves were too fiddly and popped off easily. By the time he could confidently put on and take off the exopack from the human-sized mannequin Grace provided, she had a small mountain of packs in need of repairing. 

Carefully removing the mask from the mannequin was counter productive and far more time consuming than breaking it. He told her as such and she merely laughed.

In hindsight and years down the line, Tsu’tey thanked Grace with all he had for her challenge. He prayed to the Great Mother, praising her for putting those curious thoughts into his head and encouraging him to take those lessons from his late teacher. 

Every prayer of gratitude he'd ever learnt fell from his lips as he knelt curled over his vulnerable, sky person son. The limp boy lay unconscious in his arms, completely shielded from the forest within Tsu'tey's protective embrace.

At the hunter's feet sat Spider's old exopack, the glass front smashed in and the cables in disarray after he'd hit the ground hard and collided with a rock concealed by moss. By some miracle, Tsu'tey had remembered to strap a spare to his belt earlier that morning.

It had happened so fast. Terrifyingly fast.

By nature, Spider had always been clumsy. So Tsu'tey had assumed this fall was like all the others. With a roll of his eyes, he'd hooked his arms under Spider's armpits and hauled him to his feet. He hadn't stood when Tsu'tey had gone to set him back down.

The hunter's ears flickered uncertainly at the strange wheezing sound the boy was making. He realised that the mask was no longer hissing in time with every breath. Time had slowed as Tsu'tey glanced to the moss cloaked rock and recognised the shape and shine of broken glass. His blood had run cold and Spider stopped making that awful noise.

Somehow that was far worse than his son struggling to breath.

Instinct had had Tsu'tey scooping his son up into his arms. He spun him round and Spider had gone limp in his grasp. His lips turning blue and his eyes unseeing. He was still breathing. But each breath was shallow. Unfufilling.

Muscle memory had Tsu’tey scrambling for the exopack at his belt. His eyes were narrowed in concentration despite the sickeningly fast pounding of his heart. Those hours spent crouched over the silicon mannequin came in handy as he managed to slip the straps over his boy's face and turn on the air flow. His large fingers fiddled frantically with the buttons, eyes flicking all over Spider's face as the mask audibly suctioned on.

Spider did not wake. But the blue tint to his face had immediately subsided as Earth air flooded his system; filling his suffocating lungs. The seizing of his chest ceased and he finally stopped twitching. He looked like he'd fallen asleep again.

Tsu’tey could've wept with relief as he clutched Spider to his chest; fingers spread between his shoulder blades to support his back where he could feel the steady beat of his heart beneath his hand. His head was cradled against his neck, where the rhythmic inhale and click of the exopack further calmed Tsu'tey's nerves.

He would live, he knew.

After years of war, he knew first hand what a dying human sounded like. How their body seized from the lack of breathable air, how they went deathly still, eyes unseeing. 

In contrast, Spider was peaceful. Cuddling into his warmth and practically melting under his touch.

He’s been fast enough, he reassured himself. 

And for now, that was enough.

#tsu’tey #Tsu'tey #spider #spider socorro #me looking at two characters who have never met in cannon and have no idea of the other's existence #i am loving the father son potential #father son moment #father son duo #found family

[wolfjackle-creates]

WIP Wednesday

So, here's a short excerpt for WIP Wednesday (963 words)! Thank you for everyone who followed my new writing blog, the response has been so unbelievable.

Trigger Warning: Discussion of parental death

Original Prompt Fill

1st Shared Segment

-----

IKnowYourSecrets: hey

IKnowYourSecrets: I know this isnt something weve done before

IKnowYourSecrets: you said you got a cell for your last bday

IKnowYourSecrets: can I call you?

IKnowYourSecrets: heres my number XXX-XXX-XXXX

-xXPolarisXx-: is everything ok?

-xXPolarisXx-: dont answer that

-xXPolarisXx-: obv not

-xXPolarisXx-: my phones in my room brb

Danny ran up stairs to grab his phone and return to the computer before anyone could close out of his chat. He checked the number and dialed it, closing out of everything and logging out as the call connected.

“Tim?” he asked as soon as the ringing stopped. “What’s happened?”

“Danny? I… this is weird talking like this.” Tim’s voice was rough and Danny couldn’t tell if that was from emotion or just how he normally sounded.

Danny laughed a little. “Yeah. It is. Give me a sec, let me get to my room and I’ll shut the door. Give us some privacy.”

“I… yeah. I might need a few minutes.”

“Are you okay?”

Tim made a sound that was somewhere between a laugh and a sob and Danny all but ran up the stairs. “No, not really. Um. My mom’s dead.”

“What?!" What was the appropriate response to something like this? Sometimes he wished he had Jazz's way with words. "What happened?”

“She and dad were in the Caribbean." Tim let out a huff. "I didn’t even know they were in the Caribbean.”

Danny made a noise to indicate he was listening, but waited for Tim to continue.

“There was a local villain named Obeah man. He captured them and held them ransom. Gave them some water to drink at some point, but… it was poisoned. By the time Batman got there, it was too late. Mom died.” Tim gave another half-hysterical laugh. “And my dad is in a coma. He may never wake up.” His voice trailed off.

Danny swallowed. How does anyone respond to news like that? “I’m so sorry, Tim. How are you holding up? What’s going to happen now?”

“The funeral is in two days. Bruce is organizing it. And I’m going to stay with him, I guess. He said he’d be happy to foster me until my dad gets better.”

“Shit, Tim. Text me during the funeral if you need to.”

“I might take you up on that. You won’t mind?”

“Of course not. Every 5 seconds if you need to.”

“Distract me. What’s going on in your life? I don’t want to think about any of this anymore.”

“Oh, uh, all right. Are you sure?”

“Please, Danny.”

“If you change your mind, interrupt me anytime.” Danny chewed his lip. What on earth could he talk about in response to news like that? The test he had in English last week? That sounded so trite. “I did start karate training with…” he trailed off before he could say his mom. “Anyway, it’s going all right. I’ve basically only been taught basic moves. I only get lessons two or three times a month so it’s slow going.”

Tim’s voice was still shaky, but he seemed to latch onto the topic to Danny’s relief. “You really have to give it your all if you want to succeed. Have you learned the basic stances and things?”

“Some, I think.”

“Hold those positions. Stand in your room and just hold them for ten minutes at a time. And practice the same punch over and over. Even if your m—” Tim’s voice caught and he changed course “—instructor can’t make it. Would you be allowed to sign up for classes? Get something more consistent?”

“We don’t have the money.” Danny bit back the embarrassment he felt at admitting that. Tim was rich-rich and never had to worry about things like bills. “Ghost hunting doesn’t really pay. My parents are at least good engineers so they can fix our own appliances and vehicles. Sometimes dad or mom will fix stuff for the neighbors for some extra money.”

Tim hummed in understanding and didn’t push the issue. “How did they even get into ghosts to begin with?”

“If we ever end up in the same place, you are not allowed to ask that directly to my parents. Don’t mention ghosts at all. They won’t stop talking for hours. As for how they got into it… Dad’s always believed in the supernatural. He could’ve just as easily started tracking big foot or the Loch Ness Monster. But he met mom in university and she was stuck on ghosts. Dragged him in, too. And he’s obsessive. Once he decides on something, that’s it.

“They were both studying the supernatural and had to decide what to focus on for their doctoral research. Mom’s hated ghosts since she was a teenager. Apparently she and a friend were dared to go into a haunted house one Halloween. She doesn’t talk about it much, but her friend died that night. She blames the ghosts and has dedicated her life to hunting them ever since.”

Tim clicked his tongue. “Wow. It almost makes sense with that back story.”

Danny snorted. “Ghosts aren’t real. I dunno what killed her friend, but it wasn’t a ghost. Wish they’d decided to hunt Bigfoot instead.”

“Really? Why do you say that?”

Danny looked out his window and stared at the setting sun. “If they were hunting bigfoot, we’d probably go camping more often. And I like camping. You get the best views of the stars that way.”

“What’s your favorite constellation?”

“That’s like asking who my favorite Star Trek character is! There’s too many to choose. But do you know the folk history of Polaris? It’s why I chose my username.” Danny talked to Tim about the stars and space until Alfred called him away for dinner. They made plans to talk online again later.

-----

Next

Now, I have a question for y'all. I was planning on finishing the entire work then publishing on a once a week basis until finished (or twice a week if I had more chapters than I expect). I've got the first chapter mostly done, just need to rewrite one section and change a few lines elsewhere. I also have the next 1.5 chapters mostly done on a first draft. I could start posting now, but I can't guarantee a posting schedule and I'll probably have to take a hiatus or two as I plan to get a new job and move sometime in the next few months.

So my question, do you want me to post now or wait? It'll probably be several months if not a year before I finish depending on how long I take and how many other projects catch my eye.

-----

In other news, the creator of the original prompt started their own fill, too! If you read mine, I am requiring you to check theirs as well because it is amazing 💕. Tumblr Link and AO3 Link

Tag List

@gremlin-bot, @bonebrokebuddy, @britcision, @lady-time-lord-, @welcometosasakiworld, @akikkobara, @phoenixdemonqueen, @dolfay, @skulld3mort-1fan, @we-ezer, @markus209, @sjrose1216, @onyxlightdragon, @dragonsrequiem, @jesus-camp-the-sequel, @spidey29phangirl, @kyrianclawraith, @evilminji, @introvert-even-on-the-internet, @emergentpanda-blog, @lexdamo, @v-inari, @idontgetpaidenoughforthisshit, @longlivethefallen

I removed the names of some people who requested a tag back in November but didn’t interact with the last snippet I shared. Since it’s been so long, I wasn’t sure if you were still interested. I’ll be more than happy to add anyone else, re-add anyone I took off, or take off anyone who doesn’t want future tags! Or start a separate list just for after there’s an AO3 link. Just let me know!

#dp x dc #my writing #bring me home fic #danny fenton #tim drake #first phone call #not a happy day #but theyll get through it

[jedi-enthusiast]

hi there!! 👋 all of your WIPs sound amazing, but I’ve got such a soft spot for murder mysteries!! I would love to hear more about its premise!!! 😊🫶✨ Thanks so much and happy writings to youu!!!

Ask About My Fics Game

Hello <3

Ok, so basically 'A Lesson in Murder Mystery' is a codywan Cody-centric fic where Cody Fett---the new engineering professor---starts working at a new university.

While he's moving his stuff into his new office, he accidentally runs into Obi-Wan Kenobi---the English professor that's everyone's favorite and has been practically working there forever. He spills coffee all over Obi-Wan's shirt, the two talk for a bit, Cody quickly catches feelings and offers to take him out for lunch over the weekend to make up for it, and Obi-Wan says it's a date.

All is well until one day Cody overhears Wolffe, who's a mechanic, talking about how "Ahsoka's brother" was a complete ass to him while he was fixing his motorcycle.

As far as Cody knows, Obi-Wan is Ahsoka's only brother.

You can see where this is going.

Cody decides that he doesn't want to date anyone who's rude to people who are just trying to do their jobs, cancels the date, ghosts Obi-Wan, and then proceeds to avoid him like the plague.

At least, until Cody finds out that Ahsoka actually has two brothers and Wolffe was definitely not talking about Obi-Wan.

Cody apologizes, explains, and then asks Obi-Wan out on another date---which Obi-Wan happily accepts. The two go, have a good time, and then head back to Obi-Wan's apartment...only for someone to then try to kill Obi-Wan.

From there the two of them work together to find out who is orchestrating the deaths of all of these professors, why they're doing so, and what connection did Qui-Gon---Obi-Wan's father---have to all of this.

----------

It's your generic murder mystery fic, but I'm really excited to write it! I've already got it outlined, but I'm holding off on writing anything new until I get farther into The Great War.

#star wars #ao3 fanfic #codywan #fanfic #codywan fanfic #obi wan kenobi #commander cody

[randoimago]

Day 4 - Drunken Confessions

Fandom: My Hero Academia

Character(s): Hizashi Yamada (Present Mic)

Type of Request: 31 Days of Oc-Trope-R

Note(s): I love Present Mic so much.

Things at UA had been hectic, but it was finally Saturday, so Hizashi practically forced you and Aizawa to go with him drinking. He had wanted to do karaoke, but Aizawa gave a firm "no" and you weren't going to argue with Aizawa.

So now the three of you were sitting in a booth with some karaage and edamame to have with your drinks. Aizawa looked like he's been sipping on the same whiskey all night while Hizashi had some kind of highball and you were drinking on whatever wouldn't make you act like that much of an idiot.

"And then after having an argument for ten minutes about the correct use of 'their, there, and they're', Bakugo gives a perfect answer. Even I was shocked considering how much of a hothead he is," Hizashi regales an English lesson he was teaching with wild gestures.

"He's smarter than he looks," Aizawa comments. Aizawa is good at his backwards compliments.

"At least you got them to do the lesson. Things were going great for me and then Midnight comes in to deliver something and the next thing I know, everyone is talking about crushes and which teachers look cute together," you say with a sigh. It'd be endearing if you weren't scared shitless that they'd somehow get you to confess your crush to a bunch of children.

"I hate kids." Aizawa shakes his head as he says this but you and Hizashi give him amused smiles because you both know that's far from the truth.

"Did they say who'd look cute with me?" Hizashi asks, a wide grin on his face.

"I think Ashido mentioned something about you and Aizawa cause of some childhood friends trope," you answer, a tad confused with what she had been talking about. Hizashi just bursts out laughing at the idea while Aizawa grumbles and drinks his whiskey.

The night goes on with you three drinking and eating some more. Aizawa decided to be the smart one and start getting water for the table while Hizashi wanted to make a tower out of his glasses, which was quickly stopped and caused him to pout.

"I need to get going. Think you can take care of him?" Aizawa suddenly says as he checks the time. You do as well. It's late but not that bad.

"Thinking of doing some patrolling?" You ask, you wouldn't be surprised if Aizawa did sober up to a quick ten minute patrol this late. You were glad when he shook his head.

"Don't want a hangover so I'm going home to decompress."

"What a responsible adult," you tease and Aizawa rolls his eyes. Hizashi is already whining about Aizawa leaving and you chuckle and shake your head. "Maybe we should get him home first," you say and Aizawa nods.

You both drag the drunken Hizashi back home, listening to his rambling and nonsense. There were a few times when he started to say something, but Aizawa switched topics or made him shut up. You don't know if it was going to be something embarrassing or what, but good on Aizawa for being a good friend.

When you made it back to his apartment, Aizawa offered to stay to help take care of the drunk. You declined and said you could deal with Hizashi. There was some hesitance on Aizawa's part, which you found a tad weird, but eventually he did leave. And now it was you and Hizashi on his couch while the TV played softly in the background.

"I can't believe the kids thought me and Aizawa would date." Hizashi's words are slurred as his head is resting in your lap on the couch. You tried to make him go to bed, but he was adamant that you're not allowed in his room. So, you're both on the couch.

"Well, it was more thinking that you two would be a cute couple instead of that you are going to date," you try to explain, only to get a scoff back.

"But I don't wanna date him. I wanna date you. Shota is mean and grouchy," Hizashi pouts but you were a bit hung up with what he had said previously.

"You want to date me?" You can't help asking. He's drunk and probably talking out of his ass right now, but you can't help but be curious.

"Well yeah, you're cute and smell nice and I wanna cuddle and kiss you and do adult things!"

"Like what?" Again, you couldn't help asking. Maybe it was morbid curiosity or maybe you wanted to see what drunk things Hizashi might come up with. Whatever the excuse, you just asked that and now have to live with it.

"Like hand holding!"

"Uh huh, well how about you drink some water and get to bed then we can talk about hand holding in the morning." An amused grin is on your face as you pat Hizashi's head and he whines.

"But I want to date you now!"

"Trust me, if you remember this, you might end up regretting this happened. We'll talk in the morning, Hizashi." He mutters something that sounds a bit like 'won't regret it' but you shake your head at him and make him go to bed.

You just hope he remembers this in the morning.

#my hero academia x reader #present mic x reader #hizashi yamada x reader #hizashi x reader #mha x reader #randoimago 31 days of october

[bloodynereid]

Eye of Madness / Eye of Greatness - part 2

pairings: targaryen family x platonic! velaryon oc + implied aemond targaryen x oc

tw: blood, prophecies (?), character death, kind of dark idk, fix-it au, sword fighting, helaena is kind of ooc, daemon is somehow a good father, targcest (idk it just happened ok - my brain somehow conjured up chemistry between these two)

description: Years after the incident at Driftmark, Elaena and her family now live in Dragonstone. However, the family is called to arms in an effort to defend Lucerys' claim to the Driftmark throne. Elaena must now return to court to face her dying grandsire and the uncle whose price she had payed. An eye for an eye.

a/n: sorry this is so long... the words kind of ran away from me. anyways I would urge you read part 1 first if you haven't yet for the sake of context but I'm pretty sure you could just read this on it's own tbh. hope you enjoy part 2 as much as I enjoyed writing it :) Elaena is my little badass dreamer.

disclaimer: I unfortunately don't know High Valyrian (I am learning it on Duolingo) so the phrases and convos are a combination of different online translators and dictionaries - I tried to eliminate the English words that couldn't be translated so for the people who do know the language well, past tense stuff and some plural stuff is most definitely incorrect. If you all want to correct me on it feel free to.

part 1 / part 2

Years had passed since the incident at Driftmark and the Velaryon/Targaryen family now lived in Dragonstone, far away from the green poison that festered at the Red Keep. Even if Elaena had changed the fate of her brothers that night, the greens still thirsted for power. She was lonelier too… often exchanging ravens with Helaena but never finding that bond amongst the children of her age again. Her own brothers and cousins mostly left her alone and the younger ones were scared of the eye that was no longer there. 

Her only companions that filled her formative years were her mother, Rhaenyra and her father figure/uncle, Daemon. He had taken up her Valyrian lessons after the maester had decided to try and make Elaena wear an eye patch, telling her it was disgusting to have to see that ugly thing every day. The man disappeared without a trace one day and Elaena came back the next day later smelling of smoke and fire. Daemon had also taken up her sword training when he found her practicing with a wooden stick one day, telling her that if she insisted on training at least it should be with steel and a worthy companion. Elaena was knocked on her back more than she could count that afternoon.

The sounds of the sea crashing against the rocks helped drown out the voices that had grown harsher over the years. Demanding that she would listen to them. The heated skin of Cannibal carefully enveloped me as I cuddled into his side, lightly stroking the coal colored scales. Green festers in the cut and the man will speak truth in accusations. Accusations given for power. Power that he will never grasp.

“Ziry vestragon hae iksi naejot henujagon Zaldrīzesdōron aderī, dōna valītsos.” I felt his rumble against my back and a little laugh escaped my lips. Cannibal was a sweet creature even if he did have some harsh tendencies. He reminded me a lot of the spiders that Hel and I would catch all those years ago. I can still remember the day when I bonded with him so clearly, like it had only happened yesterday. It seems like we are to leave Dragonstone soon, sweet boy.

The day had been occupied by a storm, none of the children had been allowed outside so Elaena and her family had spent the day by the fire, exchanging stories and playing little games. It had been a while since they had done anything similar to this and Elaena had been missing her two brothers, who had been unintentionally avoiding her due to their guilt about that night. That ordinary day however would eventually turn into one of the best in her life. This was the day that the Gods had been whispering about. 

When all the castle was fast asleep, the young princess sneaked into the kitchens and grabbed a meager amount of food and a water jug before setting off to hike through the wilderness that surrounded the castle. The wind slashed and tore at her clothes while rain beat down from the heavens. 

I had finally found him as the first rays of sunlight started to permeate the sky, the gray clouds dulling the usually colorful sunrise. Cannibal was resting on one of the highest points of the island and for a young girl with only half of normal hand-eye coordination, climbing had been a… task. Especially as the wet rocks slipped and tore at my hands as I ascended the cliffs. 

“Rytsas zaldrīzes.” I said as I carefully approached the large mount and the dragon slowly opened his eyes and looked at me with curiosity instead of the expected fury, the Gods had been right. As always. Hello dragon.

“Gīda… gīda.” I extended my hand over to his snout, the dragon’s warm breath instantly making me forget the bitter cold that had seemed to have permanently seeped into my bones during the hike. Steady… steady.

“Kessa ao rual nyke naejot sōvegon lēda ao?” Cannibal answered with a resounding huff, that sounded to me as an agreement so I gave the beast a large smile. “Kirimvose, ñuha jorrāelagon zaldrīzes.” Will you allow me to fly with you? Thank you, my dear dragon. 

I leaned my forehead against his and carefully made my way over to his side. Sliding my fingers reassuringly across the black scales. Since he was a wild dragon and had basically killed all of the riders that had attempted to claim him - there were no ropes or saddle on his back. I would have to ride bareback then. As if he sensed my uneasiness, Cannibal turned his head to look into my eye, his head cocking before turning his snout and blowing steam at the ledge high up on the stone wall. 

“Sȳz zaldrīzes.” I took off the pack and placed it on the floor before climbing up using the cracks in the wall until I was standing on the ledge. The whispers fill my ears and give me courage. Dragon of coal. Dragon of stone. Two souls entwined in only the way a dragon and rider can be. I jump off from the ledge and hold on tightly to Cannibal’s back. He lets out a loud roar and slowly spreads his wings, I give him a little pat on his side and I hold on tight. “Soves, Cannibal.” Good dragon. Fly, Cannibal.

He lets out an even louder roar that resounds against the stone and slowly ascends into the clouds. The rain had stopped and now only the morning dew sat heavily in the air. The sun had risen fully by now and the skies were painted a dull orange and pink. I let out a laugh as we suddenly dip down and twirl around in the air. I felt free, completely free. “Dracarys!” Dragonfire!

“Ahh I knew I would find you here.” My mind is wrenched out of its memories as I hear the familiar voice of my uncle Daemon. Cannibal rumbles menacingly but I give him a reassuring pat before getting up from my spot on the rough grass. 

“Kepus, iksis ziry jēda syt ñuha gūrēñare?” Uncle, is it time for our training?

“Daor, aōha muña ēza jiōragon iā vōljes hen se Baela. Jaelza naejot ūndegon ao.” No, your mother has received a raven from Baela. She wants to see you.

“Sȳrje. Egros gūrēñare tolī?” Very well. Sword training after?

“Kessa, eman iderēbagon se vok dīnagon. Gōntan nyke ivestragon ao nūmāzma Syrax's arlie drōma?” Yes, I have chosen the perfect place. Did I tell you about Syrax’s new eggs?

We talked as we scaled up the rocks that surrounded Cannibal’s chosen resting place and Daemon excitedly spoke about the clutch of eggs he had found earlier that day. I had grown fond of the man people called Rogue Prince, he had become more of a father than Laenor and Harwin had ever been. Mother continuously joked that we were two sides of the same coin - both second-born and rogue. Father and daughter in every way that counted. Daemon entertained even my wildest mutterings and delusions. Comforting me, alongside my mother when the worst dreams came around.

The familiar bricks of the Red Keep came into view as I flew out of the clouds and descended into the Dragonpit. Letting Cannibal fly off into the wilderness after I slid off his back, he’s still a wild dragon at heart and has killed quite a few dragon keepers who tried to domesticate him over the years. Brushing off the black and red riding leathers, I took off my gloves and tightened the braids that were entwined in my hair. I had decided to come slightly later than the rest of my family - knowing the strange stares they usually attract whenever I joined them. Purple stone. Green blood spills. Against red bricks and red fire. Blood will be drawn by the knife of ire.

“Rytsas dārilaros, aōha muña ivestretan īlva naejot jiōragon ao. Konīr iksis iā anne rȳ se remȳti naejot gūrogon ao naejot se gaomagon.” One of the dragon keepers I knew well from childhood had approached me as I watched Cannibal become a speck in the sky, informing me about my mother’s instructions. Hello princess, your mother told us to receive you. There is a horse at the gates to take you to the Keep.

“Kirimvose.” I flashed him a smile before walking over to the gates, seeing a beautiful chestnut mare tied to one of the posts with one of the members of the Kingsguard sitting on a white one next to it. Thank you.

“It seems that my mother still believes me incapable of protecting myself.” I say as I untie the rope and slip onto the saddle, my sword clanging against my hip. The sound of my voice makes the guard snap out of his trance and look at me, his eyes widening. Clearing his throat in discomfort, he answers my quip:

“Sorry princess but it was actually the Queen who insisted.” My eyebrows shoot up.

“The Queen hmm? Well I sure hope you can keep up.” I knock my feet and set off into the streets of Flea Bottom as fast as I can, leaving him cursing behind me and starting up his horse as well. The small folk shout insults at me as they try to move out of the way. A laugh escapes me. It’s not like riding a dragon but at least it’s close to it. Plus it’s fun to toy with guards, especially those sent by the Queen.

I arrived at the Red Keep, with a very disgruntled guard coming in mere moments after me. I told one of the servants to inform my mother that I had arrived, giving the excuse that I wanted to go explore before seeing her.

The first place I found myself in was the training grounds. The whispers I had accompany me in the halls were downright cruel, but I had heard worse and what was I going to do - pop my eye back in? I saved my brothers and all these people care about is vanity.

Standing off to the side I leaned against one of the pillars, watching my uncle Aemond spar with Ser Crist- no that didn’t seem right, Crispin? It must be Ser Crispin. I eyed my two brothers who looked at the man in mild disgust and also slight awe. Aemond had become a skillful swordsman. Eye of sapphire. Eye of amethyst. Two souls tied together by their shared sacrifice.

“Nephews… have you come to train?”

“Now, now, Kepus, we wouldn’t want you to lose another eye. I don’t think I’d like to go blind, do you?” I spoke up which made everyone gathered in the training ground turn to look at my previously unnoticed presence. Uncle.

My brothers looked at me with quizzical looks as I pushed off the wall and walked over to stand in front of the much taller man. I fiddled with the hilt of my sword and a smirk started to rise on my face. Eye to eye. Jem to eyepatch.

“Princess, we didn’t expect you to arrive so early.” Crispin piped up from behind Aemond, I tilted my head and gave him a little nod.

“Well the guard that you sent would most probably agree with you, Ser Crispin. Now, uncle, you called for a spar. Think you could take on your favorite niece?” 

“Well dear Elaena, the offer was only extended to your brothers but I would gladly take you on. Think you can beat me?” I scoffed.

“Oh I do.” I pull the sword out of its sheath. The steel singing as I adjusted my grip on the hilt and walked back a few paces, aiming the blade at his throat.

“We shall see about that.” His eye sparked dangerously and I smirked. Let the games begin. 

He brought up his blade and tapped the sword away from his throat before lunging. The dancing of metal went on for a short time until I started to pick up his tells. Even after all these years he still favored his right foot. The idiot Crispin probably didn’t want to correct his darling prince. I side-stepped his next lunge and pivoted my foot to the side before landing a well-aimed sweep. He was on the ground a second later, sword abandoned and mine aimed at his throat.

“Gaomagon ao obūljarion?” I ask with a sharp smile, tilting my head to the side. Aemond glances at my scarred eye and lets out a laugh. Do you surrender? 

“Mērī naejot ao Elaena.” Only to you, Elaena.

I shake my head at him with an answering laugh before drawing my blade away from his throat and putting it back into its sheath. I offer my hand which he graciously takes and I help pull him up out of the dirt. I turn to my brothers who look at me with proud looks. Jace even offers a slow clap.

“I’m sure your sister misses me as much as I miss her so I shall see you at the inquisition. Brothers. Uncle.” They all nod towards me as I walk away from the training grounds, loud chatter erupting behind me as I slip through the doors.

I knock on the wooden doors as the guard looks at with suspicion painted across his face but it quickly eases when Helaena throws open the door and envelops me in a hug that has me staggering back before I can start to return it. 

“El! Oh how I’ve missed you.”

“I missed you too, Hel. You look absolutely beautiful as ever.” She offers me a wide smile before pulling me into her chambers and shutting the door behind her.

“I like your eye. Aemond doesn’t like showing his eye so he uses an eyepatch but I’m glad you don’t wear one. Come, I must show you the new additions to my collection.” And that is how we spent the next hour before the Queen walks into the room and takes a seat next to us.

“Hello girls. Elaena, your mother is requesting your presence before you join us at court.”

“Of course, your Grace.” I say as I turn to look at her and bow my head. The amethyst obviously sparkling in the light as I hear her sharp intake of breath. I give Helaena’s shoulder a squeeze and walk out of the room and into the halls. Taking off into a sprint towards mother’s assigned chambers once out of sight of the guard.

“The Queen told me that you need to see me.” I say as I burst through the doors, causing mother to look up from her book.

“Yes, my darling. How was your time with Helaena? I know you’ve been missing her.” Mother said as I enveloped her in a hug while she sat on the sofa in her joint room with Daemon. Said man was sitting next to the fire with a large and very old-looking book.

“It was wonderful. The bugs she has collected are absolutely incredible. It’s too bad I couldn’t bring any of my collection over to show her.”

“Indeed.”

“We heard about your little spar with Aemond in the training yard.” There was a teasing lilt in Daemon’s voice as he didn’t even bother to look up from the pages. I cringed as I sat down next to mother on the couch, laying my head in her lap as she stroked her fingers through the free curls that weren’t tied up in braids.

“We also heard you beat him. Seems like all your lessons with Daemon paid off.” Mother says in an admonishing tone, clearly directed towards Daemon.

“He was making jests about Jace and Luke so I had to remind him who he was talking to. Ser Crispin also never taught him not to favor his feet it seems. Aemond was completely off balance.” Daemon laughs and finally looks up from his book to give me his signature smile. I hear mother let out a breathy laugh above me and she leans down to give me a kiss over the raised skin of my scar.

“I do believe it was Daemon who first made that joke about Ser Criston Cole.”

“His name is Criston? You know that doesn’t suit him at all, I still believe Crispin makes more sense.” It was said that the laugh that Daemon let out that day was heard across the streets of Flea Bottom.

After mother insisted I wear a dress for court, I picked out one of my mother’s old red dresses that was left in the wardrobe and paired it with an equally long embroidered coat that Daemon had gifted me on one of my name days. I now stood in the large hall that surrounded the Iron Throne, periodically tapping my knee against the sheath of the sword - a small act that calmed me against the strangely loud torrent of whispers and the anxiety of the whole situation. They had been suspiciously silent for the past day but had returned at full force once I came into viewing range of the Iron Throne. A rather uncomfortable looking seat for all the troubles it had and will cause. Snow. Men of the dead rise and thirst for blood. Prince that was promised clothed in the deception of a bastard.

The beginning of the accusations went along as smoothly as one could imagine, that was until the great doors burst open and in came the King. Hunched over his cane and with a gold mask covering half of his face. The man I remember from all those years ago had become a shell of himself and pang went through my heart. Great men subjected to rot and poison by inadequate and greedy hands. 

The proceedings continued as normal with grandsire quickly rebuffing the threats to Luke’s succession and then well… Vaemond decided to insult my mother.

“And she is…”

“Say it.” I hear Daemon say from somewhere behind me. My hand slips under my coat and grasps the hilt of the sword. The metal slightly hisses as I begin to pull it out of its sheath.

“A whore.”

“I will have your tongue for that.” I hear the King say and out of my peripheral I see him stand up quickly, pulling out a dagger. I look back at Daemon for a split second as he has his hand on Dark Sister. I raise my eyebrows at him and he nods, letting the hilt fall and giving me a wink. I draw the steel completely out of its sheath and in one fell swoop half of Vaemond’s head is lying on the floor in front of me.

“Well he did once say that he would show us how his blood runs true.” 

The entire family now sat at the large dining table awaiting the King’s arrival. Alicent and my mother kept trading glances as I traced Valyrian letters into the wood, looking up periodically to catch Helaena’s or Jace’s eyes from my seat at Daemon’s side. A few more minutes passed before grandsire finally appeared - being carried in by four guards. We quickly rose out of chairs, the wood scraping against the stone floor. He was slumped over and looked on the edge of death. We all sat back down when the guards had carried him over to his place in between Alicent and mother.

“How good it is to see you all tonight, together.” The Queen then proceeded to say a prayer to the Seven and I clasp my hands across my lap and listen intently as I scan the faces of my kin. 

“... and to Vaemond Velaryon, may the Gods give him rest.” Daemon turns to me at that and we exchange smiles, accompanied by the lowest of scoffs from my part.

I continue tracing patterns and listening to the whispers in my mind as the toasts and speeches continue, taking small sips of my wine as I see others doing so. After Jace’s rather taunting toast, I lift myself out of the seat and raise my wine glass.

“I would also like to raise my glass. To my dearest aunt, you were one of my most treasured childhood companions and I have been missing you greatly throughout these years apart. You have truly grown into a wonderful young woman and it is an honor to call you my friend, as well as my kin.” Mother gives me a warm smile as she takes a sip of her wine and Daemon gives my arm a little squeeze as I sit back down, flashing me one of his rare, genuine smiles.

“Thank you, dear niece. As my brothers can probably account for, I have missed you a great deal as well. Now… I would like to toast to Baela and Rhaena. They’ll be married soon. It isn’t so bad. Mostly he just ignores you… except sometimes when he’s drunk.” Daemon laughs at my side and I add some of my own laughter as well, but not before giving my aunt a reassuring smile.

I start digging into the food and periodically take sips of wine as I converse with Daemon and my mother, watching Jace and Helaena happily dancing. An idea materializes into my mind and I excuse myself before walking over to Aemond’s chair. He turned to look at me with a peculiar expression on his face as I extended my hand. 

“Would you like to dance, uncle?” He wordlessly takes my offered hand and we sweep off into the hall to begin dancing. We mirror each other's movements as the music progresses, going slower and more cautiously than Jace and Helaena. He danced similarly to how he sparred, precise, elegant and sharp.

The merry dancing stopped however when the King slumped over and was carried out of the room, groaning. Aemond and I parted ways and we all started to go back to sit at our places, when a large pig was about to be set down in front of Aemond’s place. Knowing the consequences of this, I popped out my foot and the servant tripped, the pig falling onto the floor and the loud clatter of the silver plate reverberated throughout the dining hall. I slip back over to my seat and Daemon tilts his head with a small smile.

“What was that for you? You know I’m all for your tympir.” He whispers as I sit down. Games.

“Se māzīlarion.” I answer with a wink. The future.

I slipped into grandsire’s room after everyone had dispersed. Mother had decided we would go back to Dragonstone come morning so the servants were busying themselves packing things away and everyone else had already retired.

I had to make sure that the Queen did not put Aegon on the throne and that meant having to prevent grandsire from telling her about the song. And so I sat on the edge of the great bed and carefully took one of his hands between mine.

“Grandsire?”

“I’m sorry. But you wanted to know if I believe it to be true.”

“Grandsire? Is this about the song of ice and fire? Aegon’s dream?”

“Yes. Yes, my dear. It is true. What he saw in the North. The Prince That Was Promised.”

“I know. I know.”

“He will unite the realm, against the cold and the dark. It is you.”

“Grandsire?”

“You are the one.”

Press blade against flesh. Flesh to ice. And let the shadows guide the dragon. I carefully lift up grandsire’s hand and give him a kiss on the knuckles before straightening up and walking over to the blade of prophecy. Picking it up and placing it under my cloak I slip out of the room, making my way to the tower that I knew housed the Hand of the King. Blade against flesh.

Entering the rooms of the man who would basically single-handedly destroy my family, I take out the dagger and find the Hand sleeping with a great pile of documents next to him. The Gods had granted me another change of fate and so I placed the blade against his neck and started to cut away at the flesh, causing his eyes to burst open as he tried to push away from my grip. I held him in place as more of the dark red liquid slid down my hands. 

A few moments later he lies there in a pool of his blood, dead. I wipe the dagger clean and step back admiring the sight. Then I methodically start to throw things around the room and sneak away the valuables, making it seem more of a robbery than a planned assassination.

Taking one last look at the room, I sneak back out through one of the hidden tunnels and walk through the shadows of the castle. Placing the blade of prophecy back into its rightful place, fulfilling its call of blood. I get back to my rooms and scrub my hands of the blood and make sure to get rid of the tainted cloak and valuables before slipping under the covers and letting my ancestors' dreams quickly envelop me.

and... that's the end of part 2. hope you all enjoyed it - ik it had a kind of different vibe than part 1 but I wanted to show how El had grown and matured during those years ig. some random thoughts I had during the writing of this:

Elaena's braided hair was totally inspired by Dany's - like she saw that in her visions and randomly decided to adopt it. It probably looks like this but with her curly brunette locks.

2. Otto's death randomly came to me as I was outlining this out and it was totally self-indulgent. I just really wanted to see that man dead.

3. This wasn't the og ending I had planned out tbh but it fit better than what I had been thinking about so it ended up way more open-ended than originally intended.

4. I like to think that El understands and can speak Valyrian because it's kind of like a Percy Jackson situation where the whispers that she gets are all in Valyrian so she naturally can just understand it.

5. Her bond with Cannibal !!! This was one of those things that first popped into my mind when I first started thinking about writing a part 2. I was reminded a lot about Vhagar and Aemond's bond cause I wanted to do something that was the complete opposite. As Dany once said: Dragons are not slaves. El's bond with Cannibal is one of mutual love and trust - they are basically one person. Think about it like soulmates.

6. El is like a year-ish younger than Jace but I don't have a specific age because we don't have any specific age for Jace in the tv show so sorry about that.

7. Daemon and her have this weird father-daughter bond that was also completely self-indulgent. I like to think that he kind of saw a lot of himself in her and Rhaenyra was like go be the father that she never had. Also El calls him uncle cause it was just easier for me to put that in - like calling him father would just be weird for her and technically he is her uncle due to his marriage to Laena.

8. Last one I promise, El doesn't wear an eyepatch due to the fact that she's proud of her sacrifice and because I personally found Aemond incredibly hot when he showed his sapphire eye in ep 10.

taglist: @alexandra-001 . @chevelledahuman

#daemon targaryen #daemon targaryen x reader #daemon x reader #rhaenyra targaryen #house of the dragon #hotd #hotd fanfic #daemon targaryen x oc #aemond targaryen x oc #hotd x oc #house of the dragon fanfiction #helaena x oc #helaena the dreamer #team rhaenyra #rhaenyra is a great mom #jacaerys velaryon #aemond targaryen x reader #hotd x reader #my ocs <3

[danpuff-ao3]

Hi! I've been dipping my feet into snary because I'm kinda in an age gap, professor/student vibe recently, but I've been struggling to find slow burn fics still set in Hogwarts, do you have any good recs? Thank you either way!!

Hello hello! Sorry for the late reply, but life has been a lot lately! That said, I was glad to see this ask, as I'm such a sucker for age gaps and student/teacher fics! I don't read much slow burn, as I'm much more a lady for instant gratification, but hopefully I'll have a few good ones for you!

The Syntax of Things

by Arrisha (@arrisha-ao3). Rated: M. Words: 200,436. Mentor Snape. Coming out. Internalized homophobia. Fluff & Angst. Drama & Romance. First Time. Forbidden Love. Canon Rewrite. Tragedy. Denial of Feelings. Character Study.

A short-lived series of private lessons took place after Christmas in Harry Potter's fifth school year, during which Severus Snape attempted to teach Harry the skill of Occlumency. The lessons were ultimately cancelled when Harry was caught prying into Snape's memories, discovering the strangest things: A mysterious prophecy connected Harry's fate with Voldemort's, Harry's dad was an insufferable bully, and Severus Snape had been in love with Harry's mum. Naturally, Harry now has a million questions. Snape would prefer to answer none.

Pains and Contradictions

by atypicalsnowman. Rated: E. Words: 301,906. Angst. Tragedy. Drama. Hurt/comfort. Romance.

Note: I read this fic a lot when I was younger, and while it's not tagged Slow Burn, I'm pretty sure it is. At least, I'm fairly sure it takes them a while to hook up!

When Harry begins to break under the pressures of death and prophesy, help arrives from an unlikely quarter: Snape. Despite their own doubts, manipulations from all sides and hapless interventions combine to bring their two souls together.

Unrestrained

by Lizzy0305. Rated: E. Words: 172,727. Hogwarts Eighth Year. Powerful Harry. Animagic. Falling in Love. Angst & Humor. Hurt/comfort. Emotional infidelity. Podfic available.

After the war, Harry thinks he’s living the perfect life with Ginny in his arms and on the road to becoming an Auror. But Snape’s magic becomes unstable and suddenly, Harry must be constantly at wandpoint of a man who hated him on their best days. Things start to change and soon he starts to realize that there’s something more important than a perfect life.

Harry Potter and the Dark Enigmas

by Octroman. Rated: E. Words: 221,649. Hogwarts Eighth Year. Under-negotiated kink. Morally ambiguous character. Other content untagged.

Delve into an unofficial 8th book as Harry and Hermione return for their seventh year to complete their education. Harry struggles with the aftermath of the Battle of Hogwarts, death of loved ones, and maintaining relationships. Failing classes and avoiding friends, he questions his decision to be an Auror and his future place in the Wizarding world. A sullen Draco rallies and returns to Hogwarts, putting on a brave face for the redemption of his family. Ron is fumbling at the Ministry while Hermione practically teaches Transfiguration in light of a suitable teacher. But Harry’s most challenging task is not playing frenemies with Malfoy like it’s to win the House Cup, it’s grasping for closure with the people who are still alive.

Everything I Am

written by Serpen, translated by Acid. Rated: E. Words: 215,419. Enemies to friends to lovers. Mentions of Harry/Seamus. Hogwarts Sixth Year. Coming Out.

Sixth year is danger, heartbreak, and accepting a mission to kill. Until, one mad May, everything changes. An English translation of Everything I Am by Serpen (Serpensortia).

#danpuff recs #snarry

[zzzzzestforlife]

day 4 of 12 // working student is neither working nor studying (finally) ❄️☃️

today's accomplishments: journal / warm-up and workout / Korean lesson / Japanese lesson (2x) / Chinese lesson / Yuri on Ice / read Howl's Moving Castle / meditate

my vacation starts today!!! i'm exhausted and i just want to go home but i'm already home, so i guess i'll just go to sleep 💤 but first, what should i do tomorrow?? 👀✍️

THE LAUNDRY

COOK DELICIOUS FOOD

practice translating Spring Day (봄날) by BTS to English

practice translating 你好不好 (How are you) by Eric Chou to English

practice translating ひとりじゃない by Seventeen to English

benchmark Chinese basic short story comprehension

benchmark Japanese basic short story comprehension

journal

meditate

the list became so long 😂 i definitely won't finish all of these, but i don't care because there's always the day after and the day after, and so many more!!! i can do so, so much of everything i love and life is great!! 너무 설리다!! (i'm so excited!!)

한국어

오늘부터 내 휴무들 시작니다! 난 너무 피곤해 하고 그냥 집에 가지 싶는데 이미 집에 있어요, 그래서 난 생각해 난 그냥 자게요.

사실 내 계획 너무 길어요. 난 진짜 끝 수없어 하지만 난 상관 없어 왜냐면 많이 날들 있어요!!! 다 가장 좋아한 것들 할수있어요 하고 인생은 좋다!

中文

今天我的假期开始啊！我很累了而我只是想去家啊，但是我已经在家，所以我只是睡觉。

实际上我的计划太多啊！ 我真的不可以完成了，但是我不在乎因为我有日子很多得！我可以做都我的爱好而我的生活很好了！

💌 translating notes: oh my goodness, Korean was so easy compared to Chinese i finished translating it so much faster 😭 (if you've been following me for a bit, you'll know that this is nothing new) BUT i won't be discouraged because this just shows me that with time, i'll get better at Chinese too!

bonus: because today was full of wins, i rewarded myself by changing my phone wallpaper to motivate me to eat more 😂 (it didn't work, but it did make me laugh a couple of times at least!!)

#studyblr #langblr #student life #working student #workblr #psychblr #university #study motivation #study inspiration #studyspo #dark academia #chaotic academia #12 days of christmas #100 days of productivity #100 days of studying #100 days of self discipline #japanese langblr #chinese langblr #korean langblr #astudentslifebuoy #zesty's life #bookblr #currently reading #anime and manga #self improvement #self empowerment #self development #study aesthetic #winter #self care

[drewexe]

Like The Stars Pt. 2

pt.1 pt.2 pt.3 pt.4

Pairing: jaemin x fem!reader

Genre: smut, fluff, sex lessons au, friends to lovers

Word Count: ~8,8k

Includes: high school seniors (everyone is legal of age); canon bisexual mc; side characters donghyuck, renjun, and karina; profanities; obviously, sex lessons; kind of a slow burn?; mc being oblivious and kind of innocent but hopefully not in an annoying way; a blowjob + fingering (going slow and steady, yes)

Summary: you'd had a crush on renjun for as long as you could remember, but your lack of experience always stopped you from taking the first step; it's a good thing you have your trusted friend jaemin to help you out

Author's note: okay so here is the part 2 of this little story ! once again, thank you all so much for all the love you've given to pt1, i appreciate all of you so much ! i hope you'll enjoy this part just as much ^^ disclaimer, time moves weirdly in this, please close your eyes and pretend it makes sense ehe-

Despite your genuine intention, it took more than a couple of weeks before your lessons went further. It’d been in fact almost two months now. Not that you didn't have… sessions, during that period. No, it was just that every time you tried to go on, you got anxious again and instead, just repeated what you already had tried. At least you could say you were getting better at handjobs by now, as Jaemin had given you more tips and advice, as well as simply letting you get more practice.

Yet you were getting frustrated with yourself - why were you so scared by the idea of a blowjob? It was dumb. Especially since the whole point was that you could have a safe environment and someone you trust who would guide you and not mock you if you messed up. So you figured that it was about damn time.

Jaemin had invited you over to his place as he needed help with English and you had happily agreed - as someone who traveled a lot, it was safe to say that you were more than able to help. Currently, the two of you were sitting on the floor in his room, notebooks spread between you two as you did your best to explain to him the different forms of past tense and their proper uses. 

You were in the middle of explaining how past perfect tense worked when he suddenly let out a loud huff and plopped down to lay on his back.

“This is so annoying!” he whined, kicking up one of his legs slightly. “I don't wanna study anymore, who cares if I fail the class!”

You raised your eyebrows at him and reached over, slapping his knee. 

“Stop acting like a spoiled child, Nana” you scolded, yet a small smile curved your lips in endearment. 

“Y/N, I am a spoiled child,” he said, raising his head to look at you. Upon noticing your smile, he grinned back immediately and stood up. “Come on, don't tell me you actually wanna just keep your nose buried in these notebooks the whole afternoon,” he raised his eyebrows. Your only response was shaking your head slightly in disappointment. 

He huffed again and pouted, picking up his pen again as you once again started explaining. Unfortunately, it wasn't even 5 minutes later when he interrupted you again: “Okay, I can't focus for real, I'm sorry.”

“Alright, enough for today,” you hummed. Truth be told, you too weren't in the mood to go on, especially if it wouldn't help at all. The two of you quickly discarded the now unneeded books and you looked at him. “So what should we do then?”

Jaemin shrugged, leaning his back on the bed behind him.

“Anything you wanna do specifically?” he turned the question to you, a soft smile on his lips. 

Your mind spiraled away through what options you had, until the lesson you had just finished reminded you of the lessons you had yet to go through. Biting your lips, you looked at him. 

“I think I'm ready to go further,” you said quietly, hoping he would understand. When he looked at you with confusion, you clarified: “With my own lessons. If you're okay with that, of course.”

He looked at you for a long moment and you were almost getting anxious when he chuckled.

“I never would have expected that you'd be so excited to learn about sex, princess.” His tone held no objection or mockery though, simply amusement, so you rolled your eyes in response.

“I don't remember you disagreeing even once,” you pointed out and he scoffed slightly, leaning closer to you.

“Would you talk back like that if I was Renjun?” he asked quietly and for a second, you felt like there was something more behind those words. Yet his usual grin was back again in a blink as he got up off his spot and made his way to sit on the bed again.

Seeing him get comfortable, you lifted yourself slightly and crawled over to him, plopping down on your knees. When you looked up at him, you found him staring at you, eyebrows raised in surprise.

“Way to set the mood,” he chuckled a bit awkwardly, reaching over to cup your chin gently. “Don't push yourself too hard, okay?” 

You nodded slightly in confirmation, gently pressing your palm over his crotch. You started rubbing slow circles over his length and he let go of your face in favor of resting his arms on his sides for balance. It didn't take long before you felt him get hard under your touch so you pulled your hand away and reached up to undo his pants, pulling them down along with his underwear. By now you had grown used to seeing his dick, yet now that you were planning on putting it in your mouth, the anxiousness from the first time was back. To distract yourself, you looked up at him again.

“Say, would you mind taking your t-shirt off for me this time?” you asked, fluttering your eyelashes at him fakely. 

“You're gonna be the death of me,” he laughed, yet obliged quickly, the fabric thrown somewhere to the side and quickly forgotten about. 

You took a moment just to admire his upper body. He wasn't really buff, yet his muscles were well defined. You couldn't help but reach up and gently trace the outline of his abs, feeling the muscles tense slightly under your touch.

“Sorry, I-” you pulled your hand away quickly.

“No, it's okay,” he reassured you quickly with a short exhale. “That's nice”. You smiled at him in appreciation and your hand was back at its spot, gently touching his stomach. 

Slowly, you dragged it down his skin until it reached his half-hard length and you wrapped your hand around him as your other one came to rest on his thigh. You started stroking him slowly, your main goal right now was to work him up enough. You had come to learn that teasing slow touches and occasionally tightening your grip around him worked great for this so it didn't take you long to have him fully hard. 

“Remember, take it slow, okay?” he made sure to say, though his voice was already a bit strained. “Don't go all in at once and you don't have to right away take it in your mouth. You can just use your tongue at first.” 

You hummed and leaned down, dragging your tongue up the underside of his length, drawing a curse out of him. You couldn't help but smile as you repeated the action and he squirmed slightly. You pressed an open-mouthed kiss to the side, squeezing your hand around him gently, then moved your lips up to the tip. That was it, you were finally doing it. Inhaling through your nose, you wrapped your lips around the head and your tongue licked at the slit. 

You looked up to see how he would react and found him staring at you intensely, body tensed up as if he was trying to hold back from reacting. When his eyes met yours, he cursed quietly under his breath and one of his hands moved to curl into your hair. His touch was surprisingly gentle as he rubbed your scalp reassuringly.

“You're doing great so far, princess,” he praised quietly. 

Suppressing your smile, you twirled your tongue around his tip and at the same time started stroking him with your hand again. Okay, truth be told, you had done a little bit of research on your own - not that you didn't trust that Jaemin would be a good enough teacher, you just wanted to make him proud and you couldn't do that without any real idea of how blowjobs worked. Judging by the way his hips twitched, it was worth it. You did want to make him feel as good as possible though, so finally mustering up the courage, you opened your lips wider and started moving down, trying to take as much as you could of him.

Obviously, though, you had overestimated yourself as not even halfway down, you started feeling uncomfortable and you had to slow down. You felt a tug at your hair, which you took as a sign to go on so you forced yourself to go further, yet a new one, a bit harder came.

“Stop- fuck, Y/N, stop,” Jaemin groaned out and you immediately pulled away, scared you'd fucked up everything.

“What did I do wrong?” you asked immediately after you took a proper breath, looking up at him with a sense of panic filling you up. 

“You didn't-” he started, pausing as if to rearrange his thoughts or to find the proper words. “You haven't done anything wrong, princess,” Jaemin said finally, looking at you with gentle eyes. “Trust me, you are doing really well.”

“Then why did you want me to stop?” your voice was quiet and you bit your lips. 

“You're focusing too much on what you think you should do next,” he responded, gently stroking your hair, which soothed the slight sting from the pull earlier. “Relax, okay? If these things are done the way they should be, both you and your partner should be enjoying it. You have the upper hand, you're the one in control right now, don't rush through it just to cover everything.” You blinked up at him, confused at what he meant exactly. “You tried to go all the way down, didn't you?” he asked and you nodded slightly. “Don't. I mean, do it if you want to, obviously, but do it when you feel ready, not just because you think that's what's supposed to happen next. You're doing so well, just go with what feels comfortable for you.”

“Okay,” you hummed quietly and the smile that curved his lips was so endearing that you felt fluttering in your chest. You leaned down again, yet he spoke up again, pulling your attention.

“Go slow and have fun. And if you're not having fun, stop, okay?” He was staring at you intensely so you nodded in confirmation, a silent reassurance that you wanted to do this.

Back on track, you took the tip back between your lips, sucking gently as your hand was once again moving along his shaft at a moderate pace. Then you thought about his words - have fun. You slowed down your hand, having just the tips of your fingers press against his skin. You started pressing open-mouthed kisses against his length, occasionally licking gently. Jaemin's hand moved back into your hair.

“Do you really have to be a fucking tease?” he whined out, though you thought whining wasn't what he was going for. “I've been waiting for this for so long and you…”

“I'm having fun,” you said innocently, licking your lips as you pulled away and looked up at him, brushing your thumb down the underside of his dick. The slight twitch of his body made you smile slightly and you tightened your grip around him again, this time a little harder.

“Shouldn't have said that,” he groaned out, leaning his head back and exposing his neck to you. You laughed in amusement, yet you couldn't help but think about marking him up again. He was right, it was best not to do it to avoid someone catching up. Yet maybe if they weren't visible… 

Still having your hand stroke him at a slow pace, you moved your lips on his inner thigh. You kissed the skin gently, and you could see in the corner of your eye his head shooting up to look at you. You decided to give it a try and started sucking lightly. When he didn't try to stop you, you took on the job more seriously, nibbling on his skin and sucking harder. His thigh shivered slightly under your lips. You pulled away only when you were sure a mark would be left and you were not disappointed. 

You looked up again at him and found him biting his lips. He seemed so tense and you realized that you'd forgotten about your initial task, your hand only loosely wrapped around the base of his dick. You mumbled an apology and brought your lips back to his tip. This time you felt a little better, you were pretty sure you could do this. Wrapping your lips around him, you slowly started taking him in again. You felt the same pressure from before, yet this time you were better prepared for it. Relaxing your jaw, you pulled out to the tip and then went back down as much as you could. 

Your mouth was working slowly, your tongue helping here and there. You looked up for a reaction but you were not prepared for the groan that left Jaemin's lips as your eyes met his.

“You look so sinfully beautiful like this, fuck-” he gasped out, his hips twitching up slightly.

You felt pride fill you up again and that alone was enough to motivate you to go lower. The pressure increased and you couldn't help but choke slightly. What you didn't expect was to hear Jaemin moan out your name at that. Your eyes widened slightly and you felt a shiver run down your spine. Up until now, he had been giving positive reactions to whatever you did to him, but this was the first time you had heard something as vocal as that. In all honesty, you loved it. So you wanted to try it again. Yet as you once again started taking more of him in your mouth, you felt Jaemin's grip on your hair tighten. His self-control seemed to not be enough for this as he bucked his hips up. The movement wasn't big, but it was sharp and you couldn't help but choke again.

Jaemin groaned lowly, eyes closed as if he was trying to focus on you and your mouth only. His fingers loosened their hold on your hair gently again and you were relieved to be able to pull away a bit. Maybe with a little more practice, you'd be able to do this for longer. Now was not that moment so instead, you focused on the amount of him that you were comfortable with in your mouth. You kept your hand on the part that you couldn't cover. 

You were starting to feel a little overwhelmed already. It felt like you'd been doing this for quite some time and you considered pulling away for a breath and asking if you were not doing something right. But with one harder squeeze of your fingers around his length, you felt him tense up in that way that you knew indicated he would cum soon. 

“I'm close, princess,” he breathed out heavily, opening his eyes to look at you. You noticed how dilated his pupils were. “You don't have to- you can pull away and finish up with just your hands, otherwise it might be a bit too much for a first time,” he advised. The effort he put into making sure to be considerate and helpful was touching. So you decided to give it a shot.

Instead of pulling away, you focused on sucking harder and speeding up your movements as much as you could, bringing him over to the edge quicker than you'd expected. Suddenly, you felt a warm liquid fill your mouth and you pulled away a little so you could swallow comfortably. At first, it was okay, his cum felt a little too thick but you could manage. But quickly it did indeed get too much and you felt some of it escape the corners of your mouth. You swallowed as much as you could before finally pulling away. 

You looked up at him once again. He was breathing heavily, sweat glistening on his skin and his eyes were frozen on your mouth. You quickly wiped away the cum that was still on your chin, imagining you probably looked kinda disgusting, looking away embarrassed. He had specifically told you not to try that yet, but you had overestimated yourself and ended up making a mess of yourself. 

“So fucking gorgeous,” you heard him mumble and your eyes widened slightly, looking back at him in surprise. He chuckled quietly, leaning down to brush your hair away from your face and carefully wiping the corners of your lips. “I wanna scold you for not listening to me, yet I also wanna kiss you so much right now because you look so damn hot.”

You blinked in confusion, your brain not fully understanding how you could have possibly looked hot with cum dribbling down your chin.

“Did you really… find that attractive?” you asked doubtfully and he laughed. 

“Come here,” he said, tapping his thighs and you carefully stood up, sitting in his lap. Well almost stumbling in it as your knees nearly gave out when you stood up. “Can I kiss you?” 

“But I just-” you started, but he shushed you and cupped your cheek. He leaned closer but didn't press his lips against yours just yet. You realized he was waiting for confirmation. “Well, if it doesn't disturb you at all, yes,” you said quietly. 

He was kissing you before you even had time to process it. His lips were moving against yours, a hint of almost desperation in the way he pushed his tongue in your mouth. You had a second to question how he didn't feel gross about kissing you while the taste of him was still in your mouth before thoughts left your mind completely and you kissed back, wrapping your arms around his neck and pressing closer to him. When you pulled away, he licked his lips and pressed them against your neck gently in a soft peck, making you shiver. 

“You did so well, princess,” he mumbled against your skin and you felt yourself heating up. His arms wrapped around your waist as if to pull you closer, yet he didn't do that. “You're always doing your best, I am so proud of you.”

“Nana?” It's not that you didn't appreciate the praise, on the contrary, you loved hearing it. But his voice was so soft and full of appreciation, that you were a little confused. 

As if the sound of his name pulled him from a trance, he pulled away from your skin and unwrapped his arms from you.

“Anyways, I'm sorry to ask you to move again but I should get dressed again, so…” he chuckled and you got up from him. He pulled his pants back on, dug out a new t-shirt, and returned to the bed, getting in it as he offered his arm to you. “Cuddles?”

You weren't one to say no so with a smile you quickly got on the bed as well, laying down next to him. You curled up on his side, one of his arms wrapping around your waist gently.  Sighing quietly, you got comfortable and closed your eyes. Not that you wanted to sleep at the moment, but it was just peaceful enough that you felt like you could. Yet your mind was still a little bit stuck on what you had been doing just a few minutes ago. 

“Nana… were you- holding back earlier?” you asked, eyes focused on the ceiling above your heads instead of the boy.

“I'm always holding back when I'm with you, princess,” he chuckled and you felt like there was something more in that confession that you should have caught onto, yet you weren't sure what it was exactly. “By the way, I was thinking…” You hummed, looking at him in expectation. “I know this is technically to help you and all, but… well, obviously I get quite a lot from it so…”

“Come on, what is it?” you pushed, the pauses in his sentences making it obvious to you that he was stalling. You weren't even sure what to expect from him in this situation.

“Well, as I said, I won't do anything to you that you haven't asked me for, but…” he sighed, looking at you finally. “I was thinking that it's not fair that only you do all the work so… if you ever, like, need me to return the favor or something, I'd be happy to help.”

You raised your eyebrows at him, and suddenly the image of him going down on you came back to your mind. 

“So if I asked you to get me off right now, you'd agree?” you asked to confirm if you'd really understood him. Yet he seemed to take it as an invitation, or maybe it was just blatantly obvious that you were in fact quite needy as a small smirk curved his lips and the hand that was wrapped around your waist subtly moved lower down your stomach.

“I like to think that I'm quite skilled in this so I promise you won't be disappointed, princess,” he said and you almost wanted to smack him just to wipe the confidence off his face. Almost. Except that it sent a tingle down your spine and your breath caught in your throat when you felt his fingers press gently against the wetness between your legs. He raised his eyebrows slightly. “Shit, you do seem like you need it quite a lot right now.”

You opened your mouth to say something - defend yourself or remind him about how easily he got worked up every time you touched him. But you didn't get a chance to voice out anything as at that moment someone rang the doorbell. Jaemin froze, a curse escaping him a second later and he pulled away. 

“I completely forgot I promised Renjun we'd play today,” he sighed as he got up off the bed. It took you a moment to realize then your eyes widened. 

“Wait, that's Renjun at the door?!” you asked, your voice rising slightly as you sat up immediately. Jaemin nodded and you felt like this had to be some cruel joke. 

You got off the bed and rushed over to the mirror in his room. As you suspected, your hair was a mess and your lips were still puffy from earlier. You cursed under your nose, reaching for Jaemin's hairbrush to at least get your hair to look normal. Once you deemed yourself presentable enough, the two of you made your way downstairs and Jaemin went to open. 

“Hey, man, come in,” he greeted, grinning at the slightly older boy and stepping to the side so he could enter. “Sorry I took a while, Y/N is here, she was helping me with English,” he explained and you were glad that there was a normal reason for you to be at his place initially.

“Oh, hey, Y/N!” Renjun beamed at you when his eyes met yours and you smiled back, waving at him. “Sorry to interrupt your study session,” he said and the irony of it almost made you laugh.

“It's okay,” you reassured, fingers playing with the bracelet on your wrist nervously. “Do you two want me to leave you or something?”

“Oh, no, we'd love you to stay,” Jaemin was the first one to reply, grinning. “If you don't mind watching us play, of course.”

You shook your head to confirm you didn't in fact mind just watching and so the three of you moved to the living room where Jaemin's gaming console was situated. 

Jaemin wasn't known for having a strong competitive spirit, yet for some reason, at the moment he seemed determined to not allow Renjun to win. Renjun, on the other side, was always competitive. Legs thrown over Jaemin's lap on the couch, you watched the most intense gameplay you'd ever seen. Your eyes moved to Renjun who had chosen to take a spot cross-legged on the floor next to the couch, eyebrows furrowed in concentration as he pressed buttons on his joystick furiously. You chuckled quietly, looking up at Jaemin instead. There was determination in his eyes that you were not used to seeing. His jaw was clenched tightly and you couldn't help but admire his side profile for a second. He was an extremely good-looking boy, no wonder girls in school were so whipped for him. Well, obviously you had always known that but in the light of the most recent events between you two, you felt like you were seeing him in a new light.

Then you looked back at Renjun again. You had been in love with him almost as long as you could remember knowing him. Obviously, he was attractive, although it was in a different way from Jaemin. Renjun was somehow softer to look at, largely due to the fact that he was shorter and more petite. You knew that below the softness he was fiery and not to be messed with, but you had always been, well, soft for him. Thinking about it, you weren't sure if you had ever thought about him in a sexual way. You didn't think that was a bad thing. But you couldn't really bring yourself to imagine being intimate with him even right now, nervousness filling you as you attempted that, unlike how comfortable you felt with Jaemin. 

Caught up in your head, you had forgotten about the game the two boys were playing and you were pretty startled when Jaemin suddenly jumped up with a victorious shout, making your legs fall to the side and causing you to lose your balance as you nearly fell off the couch. 

“You don't usually care this much about winning, Jaemin,” Renjun laughed, shaking his head slightly, although you could see on his face the disappointment and frustration of losing. 

“We don't usually have an audience,” Jaemin pointed out, turning his shining eyes to you as a grin spread his lips. “I dedicate this win to you, princess. And I also believe I deserve a congratulatory kiss for it.”

He was joking, obviously, he had to be. He couldn't have just asked you to kiss him in front of Renjun. You stared at him wide-eyed, your legs still dangling awkwardly from the couch. Yet no laugh came and no ‘just kidding’ so you had to assume he really meant it. Glancing shortly at Renjun, you stood up and told yourself to relax, smiling at him. 

"Oh, my brave knight in shining armor, you have made me the happiest person in this room by winning for me a game that I don’t even know the name of," you said dramatically as you leaned over and pressed a peck against his cheek, his smile widening even more. 

Renjun's eyes moved between you two, his eyebrows raised as if he was trying to piece everything together and make sense of it.

“You two have gotten closer recently,” he remarked and for a second you were scared he'd assume something which would not be true at all. You were ready to say something to distract him, yet he spoke up first. "I'm happy to see it, though. I always thought you’re a bit too distant." 

You felt relief wash over you - he thought you were simply better friends. Well, you guessed he was right about that. But at least he hadn't caught up that there could be more behind that.

“This boy is tragic in English, I have to come to help him quite often,” you chuckled. 

Jaemin shot you a quick upset look that appeared as if feeling betrayed that you'd called him out on his English skills (which weren't even that bad, to begin with), yet you felt bad for lying like that, even though you knew that you couldn't possibly tell Renjun the truth.

~

The school cafeteria was emptier than usual as one of the teachers had called in sick today and everyone who had classes with her had had a free period. As a result, some of the students who had classes with her before or after lunch break had decided to go for a meal somewhere outside. Well, your friend group wasn't among those people so you were, as usual, sitting on one of the tables in the back of the room, each munching on something. 

“Oh, Jaemin, how did your English test go?” you asked suddenly, remembering that his English class had been one of his first. 

“I think I've got it,” he grinned proudly, winking at you and you rolled your eyes, yet smiled at him. 

“Well, no wonder, if Y/N has been helping you out and you still manage to fail, you must be a complete idiot,” Renjun noted, taking a bite of his sandwich. At the questioning look on the other two of your friends' faces, he blinked. “You guys didn't know as well? Turns out these two have been having English lessons together for a while now.”

“Oh, makes sense why you suddenly got so much closer with him then," Karina commented, a piece of chicken forgotten on her fork as she looked between you two. “I was starting to wonder since you never really said anything,” she grinned almost knowingly, setting her fork down and taking a sip of her drink instead. 

“I know, right?” Renjun laughed. “Yesterday when I was over, they seemed so comfortable together, she even played along with his dumb flirting.”

“Yep, I just didn't think that's really something worth mentioning,” you nodded quickly. 

Were you really going to get away so easily? Karina and Renjun didn't seem to really suspect anything, it seemed. But then your eyes moved to Hyuck and you found him looking at you with a calculating look on his face. You looked away, pretending you hadn't noticed. Hopefully, he wouldn't figure it out in the end. Hopefully, he wouldn't mention it. 

Yet hope was a dangerous thing, you realized when you walked out of your next class and found Donghyuck waiting for you, arms crossed in front of his chest. 

“You're having sex, aren't you?” he asked bluntly and you looked around frantically. No one seemed to pay you two attention. 

“No!” you tried to deny quickly, but the look on his face told you he wasn't buying it. “Okay, yeah, I ended up asking him for real,” you admitted, fidgeting with your bracelet. 

“Are you sure it's a good idea?” the boy asked and you felt a little bit better when you realized there was no judgment in his question, it was more like he was concerned. So you nodded, smiling. 

“He's a great teacher and he's careful with me, plus I really do enjoy spending time with him even without that so it's pretty much a win-win situation,” you reassured, yet Hyuck seemed like he had something else in mind. 

“Well, I hope you're right,” he said simply. “Such arrangements don't usually end well.” 

But before you could ask for clarification, you saw Jaemin appear from the corner of the corridor as if he had heard you talking. In a blink, the serious expression on Hyuck's face was gone, replaced with a grin. 

“Hey, lover boy,” he greeted the slightly younger boy and Jaemin slowed down in his steps, glancing at you. 

“You told him...?” he asked in confusion.

“Tell me what?” Hyuck faked surprise, raising his eyebrows. “Something going on between you two aside from those English lessons?”

“He figured it out,” you sighed, smacking Donghyuck on the arm lightly. “I told you, I was on the phone with him when I was trying to remember things from the party. Unfortunately.”

“You truly amaze me,” Donghyuck laughed, patting Jaemin on the back. “I don't know what's funnier, the fact that your excuse for the others was English lessons or the fact that they bought it.”

“Don't jinx it,” you rolled your eyes. “And please don't tell them. I'd prefer Renjun not to know about this. And Karina… well, she’s my best friend, I'll tell her myself at some point.”

You were relieved when he nodded in agreement. You were startled by his arm suddenly wrapping around your shoulders and you looked to the side to find him grinning at you. 

“You know, Y/N, I’ve heard rumors that Jaemin never sleeps with the same girl twice,” Hyuck whispered way too loudly. “Can you imagine? High school heartthrob, the most wanted boy that no one can truly have, is breaking his principles for you, Y/N,” he said dramatically and you rolled your eyes.

“Shut up, Hyuck, the two are completely different,” Jaemin scoffed and you could hear the cutting annoyance in his tone. 

“I also heard,” Hyuck ignored him, widening his eyes for the sake of being dramatic. “That he’s not had a hook-up in a while now. Hmmm, maybe since around the beginning of the new school year. Why could that be?”

“Stop rambling nonsense,” Jaemin snapped, hitting him on the back of the head and Donghyuck laughed cheerfully, running away before Jaemin had the chance to use any more violence. 

He didn’t miss the chance to send you a dramatic wink though before he was out of sight. As Jaemin walked you to your next class in comfortable silence, you couldn’t help but wonder why Donghyuck had mentioned both of those ‘rumors’. And the thought haunted you for a while after as well.

~

It wasn’t one of your best days, you could admit that. You had overslept and arrived late for school, mid-class realized you had forgotten both your history books (which meant that the teacher wouldn’t let you stay in class unless you could find someone to borrow from and, unlucky you, you couldn’t) and your lunch (which wasn’t as bad but still upsetting). On top of that, your mom had texted you that both she and your dad wouldn’t make it home today due to work. You were upset and slightly stressed out and your mind couldn’t focus on anything. So instead of going home once classes ended, you hid in the library. 

“Oh, thank you, I wouldn’t have thought to check here,” a familiar voice said and you lifted your head from the table to see a familiar head. The librarian walked away as Jaemin took a book from one of the shelves and turned around. His eyes stopped on you and he raised his eyebrows in surprise. “Oh, Y/N, what are you doing here?”

“Oh, you know, soaking up some of the smart vibes,” you tried to joke, but you failed to make it sound humorous. 

Jaemin seemed to catch on quickly that you weren’t your usual self and he made his way over to you, taking the seat across from yours. 

“What’s wrong, princess?” he asked, eyebrows furrowing with concern. 

“Oh, nothing really, just having an off day,” you reassured, managing a smile. 

To be honest, seeing him lifted your mood. How hadn’t you thought about reaching out to him before for company? With your different class schedules, you often had a hard time seeing your friends at school, sometimes even during the lunch break you couldn’t all be together and it had slipped your mind that the other four of your friend group were actually in the same building as you.

“Wanna talk about it?” he asked carefully and didn't push when you shook your head no. “Alright then, is there anything I can do to make it better?” 

“Already did, Jaem,” you smiled, reaching over to ruffle his hair and he chuckled. “I don't know why I didn't think of texting you for company or something.”

“Oh, that could happen,” he waved his hand. “I'm here now. Although I must admit, the school library is not my location of choice.”

“Well, if you want you can come over,” you offered. “My parents won't be home today so I would appreciate some company.” You couldn't help the bitterness in your tone.

The look on his face showed you that he understood what you weren't telling him - how much their absence affected you, how much you hated being alone in your home. Yet he didn't say anything about it, instead just smiled and agreed. 

About 20 minutes and a bus ride later, the two of you walked into your house. The big empty space and the thought that there wouldn't be anyone else in here tonight overwhelmed you and you didn't feel like using the common rooms so you led the way to your bedroom. 

“You know, I've been thinking about redecorating here,” you said, humming to yourself as you looked around. “Wanna help me?” you turned to him, smiling with sudden excitement. 

“Sure,” he grinned. “What’cha thinking of doing?”

“Hmmm, I think it's time I take off some of those posters over there,” you pointed, “and I have a box of photos that I wanna put up but was always too lazy to do that.”

As you spoke, you walked over to your desk and pulled out the box in question. You shuffled through the things inside it - photos of you and your friends at random places and times plus a few with your parents - and were surprised to find an unopened pack of glow-in-the-dark stars. You had also wanted to put some of those on your walls but the thought had slipped your mind and now, looking at them, a smile curved your lips. Jaemin leaned over your shoulder, surprising you as you had not realized he was behind you, and chuckled. 

“Sounds great, let's do it.”

Taking off the old things was easy, although a bit annoying. The real challenge came when it was time to put up the new stuff. The photos had a designated space on a corkboard that the two of you put up easily, but the arrangement seemed to be a living hell. No matter what you tried, you weren't satisfied. 

“Maybe if you put Karina and Hyuck over here and below them the photo with me?” Jaemin was doing his best to help you, holding up the pins whenever you tried some new configuration. You hummed and tried what he had offered. “I think it looks nice.”

“Yes, but what about this one? It's from the same day as Karina and Hyuck but it doesn't work well in the space that's left,” you huffed, pouting. If only you weren't such a perfectionist at the most random of times…

“Well you could put it across and use them as some sort of frame?” he offered and you followed through, observing the way it looked like that. 

“Yeah, that can work,” you thought about it for a moment, taking a few other photos and filling up the space. Then rearranged some of them. Then once again rearranged them. Finally, things were starting to look satisfying enough. 

Little by little, with small suggestions from Jaemin and a lot of rearranging, you were pleased with what you had accomplished. The faces of your favorite people were looking back at you, smiling as if congratulating you for a job well done. A smile grew on your face as well. 

The next step was putting up the stars. And yes, it was just as hard. You wanted them to make up actual constellations which meant that you had like ten tabs open on your phone as you guided Jaemin on where to put each star. Putting up your star sign's constellation had been the first step, followed by the dragon, which took way too much time, and by the end, you were feeling bad about making Jaemin do all this with you, but he reassured you with a bright smile that he didn't mind. 

“Put that big one as Sirius,” you pointed, currently making the big dog. You had just finished up with Orion. 

“You'll have to be a little more precise, what the fuck is Sirius?” Jaemin laughed awkwardly, looking at you in confusion.

“The brightest star visible in our sky,” you rolled your eyes, chuckling. “And also part of the dog. Take, like, eight times Orion's belt following its line.”

“I know you live in a mansion but I don't think your wall is big enough for that, love,” he rolled his eyes and you huffed.

“Then just follow the line and put it somewhere,” you said, tone slightly bratty, but he obliged without protesting. “Now, put another one above it and to the left kinda, and then kinda make a triangle.”

“God, just show me what it should look like,” Jaemin sighed, turning to you. “This is so far the worst explanation you've given me.”

You exaggerated an exasperated groan and turned your screen towards him, letting him take in the image. Nodding to himself, he got back to work, sticking little glowing stars on your wall and the constellation slowly came to life.

“Alright, there are not enough stars for anything else so that should be all,” you checked the box while Jaemin got off the chair the two of you had set up instead of a ladder. 

“Thank all gods!” he sighed dramatically and you chuckled, walking over to him.

You weren't sure what took over you, yet the next thing you knew was that you were tiptoeing to press your lips, still curved in a small smile, on his in a gentle peck. When you pulled away, his eyebrows were raised in surprise.

“I just-” you started, biting your lips. “Thank you. For helping me and for keeping me company.”

“Of course, princess,” he smiled gently. “Anything you need, I am here to help.”

You bit your lips, thinking for a moment. You were so used to doing something sexual whenever the two of you got together and your mind was already drifting away in that direction. But you didn't want to ruin the pure and soft energy that the two of you had established for now. 

“Nana, can we cuddle?” you asked instead and he chuckled.

“I didn't know you still need to ask about that,” he teased, “given what else that we have done.”

“Yeah, but… it’s always nice to ask, y’know. Plus, I wanna sit in your lap or something like that,” you pouted.

Shaking his head slightly, Jaemin took your hand and pulled you to the bed, getting up on it and pulling you sideways in his lap. He looked at you as if for confirmation that that's what you had meant and you nodded, leaning your head on his shoulder and wrapping your arm around his waist. One of his arms wrapped around you to hold you closer and his fingers started drawing small figures on your side as his other hand rested on your knee. A small smile curved your lips. It was at times like this when you appreciated how clingy this boy was. It felt perfect, it felt safe. And it felt like home more than the empty house you were in.

For a while it was quiet. Your mind started drifting away and suddenly you remembered the things Donghyuck had said the other day. It wasn’t as much about why he hadn’t made this a one-time thing, instead what kept you thinking was the idea that he had stopped seeing other people. And even more so the fact that you were unexplainably pleased by that.

“Nana?” you said quietly and he hummed. "Have you really not been with anyone else since we started this lessons thing?” 

You felt his fingers stop moving and you looked up at him. He was looking at you, lips pressed together and an unreadable expression on his face. 

“Yeah,” he nodded in the end. “I thought that it would be unfair to you. Plus, I don’t really need to see anyone else.”

“But what we do here is not something official,” you pointed out, your chest clenching as the words left your lips. You weren't sure why. “You’ve never really been one to settle down. I never intended to stop you from hooking up with other people. Or even dating someone, if you have found someone.”

“You're not stopping me, princess,” he said, sighing as he rubbed your back gently. “I am not interested in anyone else at the moment, that's the reason. And you're doing quite well in satisfying my needs, so why would I be?”

He chuckled slightly at the end and smiled at you as if trying to reassure you that you had nothing to worry about. Yet his smile didn't reach his eyes and you couldn't help but worry that he was hiding something from you.

“Do you… ever feel like I'm just using you?” you asked, biting your lips. This had been something you worried about for a while actually - sure, he only seemed uncomfortable the first time, but what if he just didn't want to hurt you by backing out after he had already agreed? 

“Love, what's with these questions all of a sudden?” he raised his eyebrows, taking your chin between his fingers and lifting your head slightly to make sure you were looking at him. “Of course you're not ‘just using’ me. I agreed to it and, trust me, I enjoy every moment of it. If you're anxious because I wait for you to initiate things, we agreed on that at the beginning and it’s for you to feel comfortable, right?” 

You nodded slightly, a small pout curving your lips. It seemed like he wasn't sure whether you believed him or not, so he hummed and leaned closer, pecking your lips softly. You blinked in surprise. 

“Is this enough to convince you that I am happy with the way things are or would you need me to fuck you to prove it?” he grinned and you rolled your eyes. You were well aware it was just a joke yet your body seemed to react to the suggestion as you felt yourself heating up. 

“I don't-” you started, but you weren't sure what you wanted to say. As much as the idea of having sex with Jaemin seemed appealing, you didn't feel that the time was right. But then again, it did seem appealing… and he had offered…

“What are you thinking about, princess?” he asked, his voice so close to your ear that it startled you. “You can be honest with me.” 

“I'm not… ready to go all the way,” you admitted. “But now thanks to you I'm also needy.” You childishly whined out that one, rolling your eyes. 

“My offer still stands,” he said with a small smirk on his lips as his fingers on your knee started gently moving up and down your skin. “All you have to do is ask if you want me to take care of that for you.”

“Since when are you into teasing?” you scoffed, looking away as you couldn't stand looking at the knowing curve of his lips and his eyes looking at you intensely. 

“I've always been like this, you know,” he responded, tilting his head to the side. “And just because I haven't commented on it, doesn't mean I don't notice the way you move uncomfortably when you try to hide how turned on you are. You look adorable, by the way, the way you squirm around and get all shy without even realizing it. Makes me want to ravish you every time.”

“Oh my god, Jaemin, shut up!” you whined out. You'd be lying though if you said his words didn't affect you. You couldn't help but feel embarrassed that he had seen through you that easily. Yet the fact that he claimed to get turned on by that made the heat between your legs spread. So you took his hand on your knee, moved it up to your thigh, and after a deep breath said: “If you really mean that, now's your time to shine.” 

A soft laugh left his lips but he didn't wait for a second invitation to let his hand slip under your uniform skirt along your sensitive skin. 

“Should I take revenge for all the teasing you put me through and edge you on until you're begging me to finally make you come?” he asked, voice low as his thumb brushed against your clothed clit, making your thighs twitch. 

“I never meant to tease you!” you defended yourself, although if you had to be honest, you did enjoy it a lot of the time. 

“I know, princess,” he assured you, despite the knowing smirk on his lips. “And since you've been such a diligent student… you deserve a little reward.”

And true to his word, he carefully pushed your panties to the side and one of his fingers moved up your slit, drawing a whimper out of you. His thumb pressed against your clit and rubbed carefully and you let your head fall back on his shoulder. 

There was something different about Jaemin at the moment. Yes, he'd always been confident and even though you were usually the one in control, that didn't change. But this time his energy was different - he was dominating the situation with nothing more than a couple of soft touches. 

One of his fingers started pushing inside you slowly and you bit your lips to hold back a whimper. His free hand moved to your head and gently stroked your hair as he started pumping his finger in and out carefully. Occasionally, his thumb would rub over your clit. And as good as it felt… it was nowhere near enough.

“Jaemin, please,” you pleaded quietly. “You said you wouldn’t tease.”

“I’m just making the most of my time,” he chuckled. “You’re just too soft and wet, princess, I’m sorry.” You wined out and he smiled a little wider. “Give me a kiss and I’ll think about it.”

“I’m starting to think you really meant that part about the begging,” you muttered as you hooked your fingers in his shirt and tugged him closer to press your lips against his.

“Don’t mind if you do,” he whispered against your lips when you pulled away, the corner of his mouth tugging upwards.

Yet he didn’t wait for you to say anything else. His movements sped up almost immediately after a second finger made its way inside you. This time you couldn’t fight your moan as a shiver ran down your spine. Jaemin’s fingers worked quickly inside you, spreading you out and curling, pressing against your walls until he found that spot that made you shake with pleasure. And then it was like a whole new world opened its doors for you.

Jaemin pressed his lips gently against your neck, kissing along your skin. You could feel how careful he was to not spend too much time on any one spot in case your skin bruised and it saddened you a bit, but fuck, it still felt so good. Then he moved up your throat to a spot below your ear. That’s where he started sucking on your skin harder. All the while, his fingers kept up their sweet torture, making your body twist in his hold as moans fell from your lips one after another.

“That’s my good girl,” Jaemin whispered against your ear and you whimpered. “I’ve imagined this so many times, you know? How receptive you’d be, how loud you’d get when I’m touching you. I’d also love to know how you taste, to see what you look like when you cum. Will you show me, princess?”

“Nana, please,” you whimpered again and the sharp exhale that you felt against your skin reminded you that he seemed to have a thing for begging. “I’m close, please, don’t stop.”

“As long as you promise to moan as loud as you can for me, princess,” he said with a low tone, his hot breath hitting your sensitive skin. “Tell me how good I’m making you feel, let me hear you.”

And who were you to say no, really? Not with the way his fingers were moving, not with the way his thumb was pressing against your clit, and definitely not with the way he was making you see stars. Every moan you let out seemed to make him even more determined until finally you couldn’t take it anymore and came with a whine of his name.

When you opened your eyes again, Jaemin was looking at you with the softest star-struck expression you’d ever seen. Your heart skipped a beat at the warmth in his eyes.

“You’re so beautiful,” he said softly and you felt bubbling in your chest. If you weren’t in a daze from your orgasm, you’d probably think about that. But you didn’t. 

“And you’re hard,” you chuckled instead and earned yourself an eye-roll in response. 

“I believe I have a pretty valid reason for that, while you didn’t have one for completely ignoring my compliment.”

“No, listen,” you hummed and pecked his cheek. “Thank you. But I just thought that it would be unfair to just leave you like this. I should return the favor, no?”

“Not this time, love,” he shook his head. “I’ll be okay. I’d prefer to just stay like this for a little longer.”

~

taglist: @multihoe-net @jaeymark @bythe8 @jaemboi64 @okokoksblog @paintandwine @fairypothos @sweetjaemss @magnificentjudgemoneyhands @jsjcue @sunshinedhyuck @luvdroids @wanlore @marklexleaf @back2jisung @taehyungmami @the-midnight-arthouse @multifandombtvh @chichhihaa @nctevia @thiccfullsun @hwanunjin @dinochocochip @keemburley @jaemints

#nct #nct scenarios #nct imagines #nct smut #nct dream #nct dream scenarios #nct dream imagines #nct dream smut #nct jaemin #jaemin imagines #jaemin smut #jaemin x reader #na jaemin #na jaemin scenarios #na jaemin smut #na jaemin x reader

[a-pop-of-korean]

hello i have a question about learning korean ^^

i started ( self ) studying it about two years ago but discontinued due to college and all, but now i want to pick it up again and i don't know where to start from? i know how to read and write, but i have issues reading in one go— basically i lack fluency in reading and i often stutter. is there any way to improve?

secondly, i do know some basic stuff however my vocabulary isn't vast enough. besides, i would like to understand the sentence structure, or how they write phrases and sentences since it's very different from english. i've referred to so many sites but there's always a question— do i work on vocabulary first or sentence / phrasing structure first? or do i study both of them along side?

this sounds like such a mess and it is because i'm so lost ┬┬﹏┬┬ my main goal is to understand korean shows without subtitles and i do pick up a few words and phrases here and there but there's a lot still left to learn and idk where to start from. moreover, i've noticed that the textbook korean and the one that's spoken in everyday life is way different ( this applies to almost all the languages tbh ) and i'm having a bit of a trouble trying to figure out how a native would say it?

or example, do this thing where i come up with a sentence and try to translate it just to check what it would be in korean and check in the translator to see if i'm right, and most of the time im not. whether it's about the formalities or the conjugations. basically a whole lot of issues so please if u can help ＞︿＜

Hello! If your goal is to be able to understand Korean content without subtitles, then I think self-studying grammar and vocabulary is a good idea. I know you said you already have some knowledge of Korean, so I would refer to my masterlist and start from wherever you feel appropriate. I also recommend diversifying your study material and looking at other resources on Tumblr, YouTube, and on the Internet elsewhere. There's a lot out there!

As for your second question, I think it makes more sense to study vocab and grammar at the same time. As I've said before in previous asks, I was never that disciplined with my studying, so I can't really give you concrete study techniques. I think I got where I am today by regular exposure (on top of taking Korean courses and studying abroad lol). But if you don't have those opportunities, using whatever resources on the Internet can get you far. As you get comfortable with both grammar and vocab, I recommend exposing yourself to content like webtoons in Korean and K-dramas. These will help you with your reading and listening comprehension. There are plenty of webtoons at varying levels of difficulty, and K-drama actors have clear diction that is easy to understand. Again, I don't exactly have concrete techniques for how to eventually ween yourself off of subtitles/translations (since I myself still use them), but in my experience, exposure alone is enough to at least allow me to read webtoons and watch K-dramas without relying super heavily on the translations. Consuming this content will also teach you how natural Korean is spoken by natives. I hope that makes sense!

If you're concerned about speaking, the best way to get better is to converse with others. You might not know other people who speak Korean, but you can still practice with others for free on Hilokal, where I used to teach live lessons. It's a nice, low-pressure environment that can help you get more comfortable with speaking and learn alongside other people just like you!

Also, I generally don't recommend using translators to help you learn a language, especially if you're an English speaker learning Korean. It's more useful for you to understand the meaning of the Korean itself than it is for you to get the perfect translation. Korean is especially difficult to translate into English (in my opinion), so a translator might not give you a clean, accurate, and natural translation. Unfortunately, I can't think of other ways to fact-check your sentences otherwise lol. But I think that looking at enough sample sentences will help you become better at constructing your own. And something that helped me feel more comfortable writing and speaking when I was abroad is that, even if I make minor mistakes, chances are that other people can still understand me. Maybe keeping that in mind can make the learning process a little less stressful :)

Maybe this advice isn't new for you, but I hope it was still helpful! Thanks for the question and good luck! 화이팅!

#한국어 #korean langblr #korean #apok q&a #korean q&a #apok

[adhd-languages]

how do you actually like. learn languages with adhd? like in terms of "how do you stay focused" and "how do you stay invested/motivated for extended periods of time" and "how do you actually like. sit down to do* a study session?"

i know that immersion's good and all, but i find it really hard to just. sit there and watch [language] content when there's so much other stuff in my native language that's so much better and understandable.

with talking to ppl, i always feel like i gotta know enough to have a conversation in order to have a conversation, y'know? so i never end up having any conversations lol

when i've tried learning languages before i've almost always lost interest in it after a few weeks, and that kinda sucks. esp because half the time my interest shifts to a different language lmao

so yeah. advice?

*"to sit down to do" is a curious construction in my ideolect that means like. "to try to start doing"? it doesn't nesesserily mean physically sitting down, but does come from when i sit down to do maths homework or whatever and then actually start it two hours later, y'know? having the distinction between that and "to start" is useful lol

Immersion is really tough -- it's hard to feel invested in plot and characters if you hardly understand what people are saying...so here's a secret. Rewatch a show you love in English, in your target language dub. I'm listening to a fandub of "Welcome to Night Vale". It's really fun for me. I know that people go on about how it's better to learn from Original Native Content, but anything that keeps your interest is always better than nothing. And besides, there's a lot you can notice about the way they chose to translate things - it's fascinating!

Here's my super embarrassing language advice - I just daydream in Spanish. And a lot of the time, the spark of motivation to figure out a new bit of sentence structure is just me trying to figure out how to say a sentence in my internal monologue. I got hyperfixated on languages and sprinkled multilingualism into my mind soup. It sticks with me better when I learn grammar because I want to use it, rather than just sitting down to try and study something that's completely abstract. This actually works from pretty much any level. I think the sooner you use your target language like your native one, the better. Not sure if this would help but it might?

It's ok to learn in bursts. It's supposed to be fun, and a hobby. It's worth trying to fit your target language into your daily routine. I am a Duolingo guy, and I know it's not the best way to learn, but doing a little lesson everyday to keep up my stupid little streak can jumpstart me into studying properly. Or at least have me do a little bit of practice if nothing else, remind my brain that these languages exist, yknow.

Also, I have gained and lost interest in a LOT of languages - Korean, Swedish, Toki Poni, Dutch, I've gone on and off with Japanese a few times, and so many languages I just tried to learn for one day. And that's okay too! You don't need to become fluent just to enjoy learning a little bit about a language. :-)

I hope at least one part of this was helpful? I'm going to be honest, I wasn't sure how to answer this ask because even though you would assume it with me running a language blog and all, I'm not always a great student. At all. The amount I'm studying fluctuates a lot, and it's just something I've accepted. There's no rush, so just do whatever works for you, even if it's not "the most effective" way of doing it. Everything is progress, anyhow.

(also, the "sit down to do" thing makes perfect sense to me. And for the conversations thing.... yeah, I don't talk to people much either. I'm shy. So, I'm not sure how to help with that one.)

#I hope the mind soup is relatable rather than concerning #and I really hope at least something here helps #sorry it took so long to answer I was not sure what to say #I tend not to get asked for advice like this because it is also my weakness #langblr #language #language learning #asks #long post #Quinn posts

[chris-bun]

#Winterfieldweek2024

🎉 Day 4 “slow dancing” 🎉

Today I wanted to write something, soooo… :)

(English is not my first language, so sorry for some mistakes!)

……

- this is so stupid. — Winters can’t help but grin when he looks at how seriously Christopher extends his hand to him, inviting him to a slow dance.

It happened so unexpectedly, so spontaneously, that Ethan stands there with that stupid smile, not knowing what to say or what to do.

Walking along the evening streets of Los Angeles, the men did not expect to see a live performance of some little-known group, which thereby wanted to attract people's attention with their songs. Well, it was a very good move, because even Chris and Ethan became interested. With every minute the songs became calmer, forcing the couples to merge in a slow dance. So Redfield himself decided not to stand aside.

— You know that the last time I did something like that, it was God knows when. - Christopher said quietly, smiling slightly at his beloved when he gently took his hand in response.

— Exactly. So I want to capture as much of this moment as possible. - Ethan grinned, placing his free hand on the captain's shoulder.

The cold November wind blew across the lovers, forcing them to press closer to each other. "Alpha" wrapped his free hand around Winters' waist, warming him with his body. At this moment, they didn't care much. Only Redfield's thoughts were occupied with memories of how to properly hold a partner and in which direction to move his legs.

The captain vaguely remembered his graduation. It was dark, cramped, and it smelled like cheap alcohol from the teenagers standing nearby. Not like he saw in the teen movies his little sister often liked to watch. His dance partner was some girl a year younger who managed to sneak into prom to get an idea of ​​what it will be like a year later. The awkwardness between them could be seen with the naked eye, as well as a complete lack of understanding of how to dance. Their practice dances with Claire were radically different from the normal understanding. They didn’t have any parents to ask for the practise lessons, and his friends from school didn’t know much about it themselves. So he had to get out of it with his younger sister, dances with whom ALWAYS ended in some kind of tomfoolery.

Returning to graduation, she is a member of the drawing club, he is a basketball player on the school team. His first full-fledged slow dance was more like a fast walk in a circle, so the girl, out of shame, left this event at the same moment, leaving Chris alone with his thoughts. After graduation, he somehow had no time for it. At least that's how it was before he met Ethan.

With Winters, he couldn't predict what would happen in five minutes. His actions, behavior and character were so harsh that Redfield was simply lost, looking dumbfounded as the engineer tried to prove to the store clerk that the cheese had a false expiration date because of its smell. With him, the captain became comfortable visiting bars, which he tried not to approach at all. He had so many memories of their trips to this place that he could write his own book. It couldn't have happened without dancing either.

.

.

He remembered it, like it was yesterday. It was January in 2016.

Another trip to the bar. Now Ethan has gone too far with alcohol again and because of this, Chris cannot have a peaceful evening. A couple of awkward conversations, touches, glances, and without Redfield noticing, he was standing next to him on the dance floor, intoxicated by his playful smile. And captain simply could not refuse. Ethan danced as if he would be gone tomorrow. He enjoyed every moment of life until the memories of Louisiana took over. Therefore, “Alpha” tried to do everything to make him happy... And at the moment he needed come up with something quickly, because when Winters put his palms on Christopher’s neck, pressing closer to him, the man was noticeably dumbfounded, not only not understanding what to do, but also where to put his hands. And Ethan immediately understood everything. This evening there was a lot of laughter, awkward touching, loving looks, and by the night Redfield's skills were noticeably better than they were 25 years ago.

.

.

The palm slowly moved to the lover’s cheek, smoothly stroking the cheekbones and calming the thoughtful mind.

— Here you go! You're moving better than you were at Claire's birthday. - Ethan chuckled, pecking Chris on the lips. - relax! You look too thoughtful. — Winters carefully poked the pad of his finger into the wrinkle on his lover’s forehead, which became more noticeable when he plunged deep into himself.

The captain looked up at the engineer, instantly relaxing and smiling tenderly at him. He exhaled heavily, throwing unnecessary thoughts aside, and simply continued to move the way he himself would like. Living in an environment where it was always necessary to carry out orders, to do as he was told, it was difficult for Chris to live the way Winters would have wanted. Rather impossible. But with Ethan, a lot has changed. Redfield would never have thought that he would slow dance with someone like this, wrapping him in his own jacket so that it would not be so cold.

Time passed too quickly. The music died down, the musicians put away their instruments, and people dispersed. Ethan pulled away slightly from Chris, looking around while the “Alpha” himself kept his eyes on him, smiling slightly.

- let’s go home? - the engineer asked calmly, smiling at his beloved, and wrapped himself tighter in Chris’s jacket, thinking about what kind of movie they could watch when they arrived at their home. Redfield grabbed Winters's palm, slightly squeezing it in his own, and walked with him towards the desired house, feeling that this would not be their last dance.

#resident evil #ethan winters #resident evil village #chris redfield #winterfield #Winterfieldweek2024 #winterfield week