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#& that nobody in my care company will drive that far away from home base to pick me up

lemmilemura · 3 months

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LoveSucks part 3!!!!!! ARE YOU READY??????? I SAID ARE YOU READYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?

Based on the show All kept gender-neutral, 'girly' used once or twice

I hadn't gone to school for a few days, but we also had a week off, so I didn't think it was that bad. I didn't really talk to Janae, Maeve or Simon either, eventhough I knew that was stupid and I really wanted to talk, but I knew I'd just break down the second I say a word.

I never told my parents. Why would I? They wouldn't even really care anyway. Whenever anyone would come to my place, I'd just ignore the doorbell and pretend I was sleeping, even if I was right behind the door, passing by. I knew it wasn't good for me, but at this point I had gotten used to it. Better this than suffering through awkward silences woth Simon.

The only place I went that wasn't home was the beach. I loved it. Just sitting in the sand, nobody else around me, middle of the night. The only sound was the waves, and they calmed me down. I know it sounds stupid, that's why I don't tell anyone. I was truly and wholly miserable. But my friends didn't know. So it couldn't hurt them.

Every night I was at the beach. Not too far away from my car, but still close to the water. Every now and then if a wave was closer, it'd lightly touch my feet. I let my mind to go wherever it wished, but of course it was mostly Janae, Maeve, and of course Simon. Fucking Simon. He never left my mind, even when I was doing things that had absolutely nothing to do with him. He even appeared in my dreams most nights. I hated it. Well, only somewhat. I missed the three of them immensly, so seeing them in my dreams was the most I could at all.

The rushing of the waves hid the sound of another car approaching, I only heard it when it got close. I turned and saw a few boys from school. I tried to just ignore them, but then they noticed me and started coming closer. I immediately stood up and speed-walked to my car. "Where ya goin pretty lady?" One of the called. I walked faster. "Yeah, why don't cha hang out with us?" Another asked.

Just a bit more, c'mon. Because of the sand I wasn't able to walk as fast as I wanted to, but somehow they seemed to be perfectly fine. "We promise we're nice! C'mon, girly!" They tried again. I looked back to make sure I hadn't forgotten anything, then tried to get my keys out of my pocket. But, as always when you're stressed and need to find something quick, it disappears completely and falls every five seconds.

I managed to find the keys pretty quickly, opened the door and got in, but as I was about to close it, one of the guys put his body inbetween me and the door, forcefully keeping it open. "Heyyy, where do you think you're going?" Another then stepped next to him. "Wait a minute, you hang out with Kelleher, right?" "Yeeeeah, now that 'cha say it. What're you doin' all alone here? Finally realized that he's a total freak?" "I'm sure we're much better company that him. So whaddaya say you get out your car and come join us?"

I didn't say anything, saying anything in my, or even worse Simon's defence, would just make this whole ordeal even worse. I turned away and instead worked on getting my car started up. Hopefully if I just drive I can get far enough away and then close the door. I got my key in and the engine started revving to life.

"Hey now..." one guy reached inside to grab my steeringwheel, but just as I turned to face him he got punched in the face. It shook all of us, because it was dark I couldn't really see who punched him, but I was pretty sure it wasn't one of the guys who were trying to get to me. Finally, my car started up, but I couldn't move.

"What the fuck!?" The guy's nose was bleeding from the punch. His friends helped him up then got ready to fight this random dude who was currently my hero. "Who the fuck do you think you are?" One of them asked. "Apparently a total freak" he finally spoke, and I recognized his voice. "Simon what the fuck are you doing?" I whisper yelled, grabbing his arm. "Fucking Kelleher. I'll fucking kill you" the guy he punched started swinging.

I quickly stalled the engine again and pulled out my key, I didn't want any of them driving away in my car, before getting out and doing my best to get to Simon to save him from almost certain death. They sadly already got a couple hits in, but I managed to pull him away and get him in my car. The guys started screaming again, but my brain sort of tuned them out. This time my car was nicer and got started sooner, I backed out of my parking space and drove away, them still screaming after us.

I had never driven that fast in my entire life, I didn't even really care if I'd get a ticket, at this point all I cared about was getting home. As if he'd gotten stabbed or was close to death, while all he had was just a few scrapes. I pulled into my driveway and made the garage door open, then got Simon out. We didn't say anything as I sat him down on the couch in my garage and went to go get our first-aid kit. He just sat there, disheveled, looking around the room. Even when I returned and started assessing the damage we didn't talk.

"You're a fucking idiot." I said. "You were the one at the beach in the middle of the night. Alone." He responded. "Why were you even there? You stalking me or something?" I had to force myself to focus on anything besides the weird feeling in my stomach. "I went to yours but your parents told me you were with Janae. So I called her, and she told me you weren't. I just went to the first place that came to mind."

And then he looked up at me.

How was I supposed to concentrate and get over him if he was looking up at me like a lost, abandoned puppy? Plus our faces were really close, only a few inches apart, so that wasn't helping. I immediately felt a blush coming on, so I turned back to the first aid kit and pretended to be looking for something.

"Should I not have?" He asked. "No, you're fine." I responded. I took a breath and then turned back to face him. "Thank you. Thank you for saving me Simon." I smiled at him. "Heh. Getting beat up was definitely worth it. Don't know what I would have done if they'd done something to you."

The atmosphere finally got too tense, and I decided to just suck it up and started talking. "I'm... sorry for what happened. I just kinda... burst. Just wasn't thinking right I guess." I explained, plopping down next to him. "Well, I still like you." He said, looking to me. "Do you still like me?" He asked, once again giving me a giant puppy face. That fucking face.

"How can I not when you look like a kicked puppy?" I joked, which made him chuckle too. "Seriously though. Did I fuck up?" He asked. "Of course you didn't. I was just... too overwhelmed with shit and overreacted. You're fine, really." I explained. If I could, I would go back in time and not say those things, a lot would be solved and he also wouldn't have gotten beaten up.

"That's good..." We once again sat in silence. I decided to get up and put the first-aid kit away. "So uhm... what were you and Janae listening to that one time you two had a party?" "Wait how do you know about that?" He laughed. "I wanted to come by but saw you two were 'busy'" he said with air-quotes. "So I left" Of course he had to see that. Great.

"It's, well, a playlist we made a while ago." I pulled out my phone and connected it to my speakers. Might as well. "Really? Janae listens to Katy Perry?" He asked. "Kinda? Listen, no matter how you feel about her, Hot N' Cold is amazing." I decided to put it on shuffle, but of course the first song to play was HONEY.

"Okay so we're still friends, but... what about more? Last time we both kinda... blurted it out didn't we?" He said. Shit. That's right. In our overwhelmed-ness we both sort of confessed to eachother. That did happen. "That we did do." I sat back down, this time facing him. "So? What are we? Because I still want to be with you." "I honestly feel like I don't deserve you given how I acted last time."

"Why do you think that?" He asked. "Oh c'mon! I literally flew off the handle at you! I barely let you speak..." I just wanted to disappear that moment, to not have this conversation, but I also knew it needed to happen. "Nonsense! I totally get where you were coming from. But you also can't only blame me for showing up here, it was Janae and Maeve who convinced me."

"They knew??" I could not believe it. My best friend, to whom I had been lamenting my unrequited feelings to knew all that time he felt the same? How could she. The betrayal. "Did you never notice I didn't have any of your notes? I didn't go to school either that day, I just came because I wanted to see you. They convinced me to do it." Janae was definitely getting a phone call later.

"Never thought you would skip school." I joked. "I wasn't skipping. I felt like shit. Not that it mattered, I changed my attendance so it's fine. Changed yours too by the way." "You know you didn't have to do that." I said. "There's a lot of things I don't have to do but still do because, and get this," he leaned closer "I want to" he whispered.

For a moment we stayed like that, faces so close, just looking at eachother. "Just like this." He said, then grabbed my face and kissed me. It happened so fast I couldn't even blink. He just grabbed me, pulled me in, and let me go just as fast. I just stared, obviously flushed, in disbelief. "I still love you." He said. "Do you still love me?" Just as fast, I threw all cautioun out the window and kissed him again, this time actually participaring.

To think that the moment I had waited for so long was finally there was surreal, the feeling completely foreign, but oh so welcome. "I'll take that as a yes" he managed to say between kisses, then pushed me so I was laying down on the couch.

Janae would get that call tomorrow.

#simon kelleher #oouil #one of us is lying #oneshot #oouil tv show

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shyrose57 · 3 years

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Lullaby for a Princess Duet, except it’s an AU based in the Antarctic Empire. Emperor Philza and Prince Techno share the role of Celestia, favoring each other to the rest of their family, and unintentionally overshadowing and neglecting Prince Wilbur and Prince Tommy, who share the role of Luna.

Something leads to an argument between Wilbur and Phil and Techno. I’m considering their whole world domination thing back in SMP Earth. Maybe Wilbur is leads the fight against them, making them feel betrayed and him snapping at them for being upset after acting like they don’t care.

Whatever happens, Wilbur is killed sometime after. Only, he never respawns, leaving the family to mourn, and try to patch their mistakes while they still can.

Years later, Techno is visiting his twin’s memorial in the castle garden, wandering on what could have been if he had seen the signs and done something, and regretting being so blind to his siblings’ pain.

(Outside, a shadow considers similar things of their own, but accepts what is bittersweetly, and hopes his family doesn’t burden themselves with his disappearance too much)

As he goes to bed, sleep weighing on his eyelids, he swears he hears a familiar lullaby lulling to slumber.

Meanwhile, outside his window, a Phantom!Wilbur watches as his twin finally sleeps after days of avoiding it. He smiles softly, slipping away to check on the rest of his family before he vanishes back to the lake he has made his home at, among others in similar situations.

Parody would go something like....this maybe..?

Techno

(Wilbur)

(Oh, brother...

I’m sorry it came to this.

If only we could all go back)

Fate has been cruel,

My chaos unkind,

Why did we drive you away?

(I’m sorry I’ve left things this way)

The blame is my own,

(My choices are mine)

The halls are so quiet these days...

In this silence, I wish for your song,

(Fear not the silence, I’ll sing you my song)

If only your company we’d kept

(And I will your company keep

(Till your tired eyes and my lullabies,

Have carried you softly to sleep...)

Never can I repay my debt..

Once stood two rulers,

who relished in blood,

Look over their kingdom and sigh,

They shared smiles and said,

There is nobody who can defeat us,

and it was no lie.

So great was their reign,

and so brilliant their glory,

That long was the shadow they’d cast,

It fell dark upon the two younger they loved,

And grew only darker with each year that passed.

Rest well, lost prince,

Goodnight brother mine,

(Rest well, Tech, goodnight brother mine)

Fly now in sunlight’s embrace,

(Sleep now in moonlight’s embrace

Hear my lullaby,

along the winds of the earth,

Dream of clouds, and sky, and infinite space.

Take heed of the peace and enjoy the night,

And know my sorrow in kind)

Wilbur, you were loved so much more than you knew,

Forgive me for being so blind.

(Tech, you loved us much more than I knew,

Forgive me for being so blind...)

Soon did the younger do what was demanded,

When the elders went much too far,

Fighting their family, they returned peace to the land,

But the price was a death, and a brother now scarred.

(Such is the weight of the titles I’d worn, brother,

Duties to always uphold...)

May you forgive me, that foolishness mine,

And find rest with no burden upon your soul,

Rest well, lost prince,

Goodnight brother mine,

(Rest well, Tech,

Goodnight brother mine)

Fly now in sunlight’s embrace.

(Sleep now in moonlight’s embrace,

May my soft lullaby reach you in dreams,

And ease you of restless nights)

May my apologies find you today,

And may my sorrow in kind.

(And know my sorrow in kind)

Wilbur, you were loved so much more than you knew,

Forgive me for being so blind.

(Tech, you loved us much more than I knew,

Forgive me for being so blind)

May troubles be far from your mind

(May troubles be far from your mind)

And forgive me for being so blind...

(And forgive me for being so blind)

#dream smp #dream smp au #antarctic empire #wilbur soot #technoblade #tommyinnit #philza #guess what I was listening to at one in the morning #and guess how I made myself cry #osmp

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justhereforfanfiction · 4 years

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Lost - Logan x MC

Angst, approximately 2, 500 words.

Hi. This is my first ever fanfiction, so any feedback is welcome! Although I haven't posted any fanfictions on there other than this one, I will likely branch out from Choices on Wattpad and if you are interested in that, maybe you could look at my account? It's @ GalaxyGirl20671! Again, feedback including constructive criticism is welcome, and I hope you like it! I think it helps 'set the mood' if you do listen to the song, but in no way do you have to! I hope you enjoy. 😊

I know I didn't use every lyric but that's because I didn't want to use repeated lines in case it became repetitive.

Song - Lost by Freya Ridings

*I know I use 'Ellie' in this instance but it just represents the MC - to me, it feels a bit detached to use 'Y/N' - but feel free to self-insert if you wish! :)*

'Standing on the platform, watching you go...'

Ellie stood at the turn - in at the end of her block, watching as a sleek, black-striped yellow sports car slid out of its slot into the street. Almost as easy as it had come into her life, she supposed, on that less-than-fateful day. But she knew that that was not the case, just as she knew the boy whose spark plug necklace was slipped under her t-shirt, guarding her rapidly beating heart.

'It's like no other pain I've ever known'

That same heart ached at even the concept of him leaving her side, yet somehow there the reality was painted, harsh and monochrome against the bold, colourful canvas of what had been her hopes and dreams for the two of them. Although with him, those dreams could have been driving around the city or sat in some reincarnation of his loft eating takeout from Kelso's, and it would still make her feel as though she was graduating from a hundred- no, a thousand - Langstons. Her sense of loss was so strong it manifested itself as physical pain - a common symptom of undergoing stress, she seemed to remember from one of their late-night 'study sessions', the knot in her stomach tightening at the fond, soon-to-be-bittersweet memory.

'To love someone so much, to have no control...'

Ellie could still feel her whole body pulse gently, perhaps not entirely from her emotions (although those threatened to overwhelm her), but from the intensity and fierceness of their last embrace before he left. That had been out of her hands, he had wanted to keep her safe - but her father pulling a gun on him only pushed the situation further out of her grasp. It seemed she had come full circle - from her cop father controlling her life to her breaking free, her forgiving him again, and back to him commanding the one thing she loved beside him; the boy with the car. Couldn't she have one untarnished goodbye out of the many to remember him by, without someone accusing them of something? Ellie's dad had only been trying to protect her, and she knew that - but her first everything had been putting HER first as well, being noble for Gods' sake! Even if it didn't feel like it to her...

'You said "I wanna see the world", and I said "Go"'

The look on his face had told Ellie one thing, yet his mouth spoke another. He had known she had plans for the future, and to him, he was getting in the way of those. With his words, he gently retracted himself from her life. He had been 'just some kid you caused trouble with in high school' to her father undoubtedly, but in Ellie's heart, she knew he was so much more. However, while he was saying that, his arms drew her in and she had melted into his touch. The sound of his car engine seemed to call out decidedly that his words had signified his true intentions.

'I think I'm lost, without you'

Without him, Ellie didn't know who she should be anymore. He was the one who brought her into this life, who brought out this side of her. Every time she had been brave, or confident, or even remotely bold, it had been because of him, directly or otherwise? Whoever thought she'd dance at a secret warehouse rave? Or pass her driving test? Or even talk to Ingrid as an equal in any way other than academics? Going back to her old self felt as difficult as trying to separate water from the sand without filter paper. "Be the real you. the one that was always waiting to come out" he had said. She wanted to so badly, but how could she do that when so much of that person was based on him? It was just like Colt had said - every time she gets behind the wheel she will remember them and the year she had spent.

'I just feel crushed without you'

Ellie's emotions weighed down on her like the heavens on Atlas the Titans' shoulders. Whenever they had been driving or executing one of Kanaeko's master plans with the rest of the MPC, she had enjoyed - no, loved - his company, yet now she realised that once the others were gone he had been the one she needed the most of all of them. And now he was about to be gone, leaving her with a stolen car that Toby wasn't here to patch up, and the memories of fleeting touches long since past.

'I've been strong for so long, I never thought

how much I needed you'

Even when he had left after teaching her to fight, Ellie had not felt it with the same note of finality that this moment held. She had always thought there was a possibility - however small - of seeing him one last time. And now, even though she wished it desperately, Ellie knew he wasn't coming back. This time, too much was on the line.

'Strangers rushing past, just trying to get home.'

In the not-so-far distance, Ellie could hear the steady stream of LA traffic that the boy she loved would soon enter. She wondered - would they know a wanted street racer was cruising down the freeway amongst them? That that drive was breaking two hearts and would damage at least one more before the night was out? Nobody knew where he was going, however, not even Ellie. Her best guess was back to Detroit, but Ellie guessed that not even he knew where he would wind up tomorrow morning. Even that one suggestion could have been some sort of plot to make sure she didn't worry about him (although she would nonetheless) or found where he was. He knew her better than anyone, after all. She would only have agreed to Mona's terms if he had reiterated them.

'But you were the only safe haven that I've known'

Those words were true enough. Despite her father claiming to support her in everything she did, the one thing Ellie never knew she wanted had been right under her nose, kept away from her by the one who 'only wanted her to be happy'. Sure, Ellie understood that Grand Theft Auto wasn't exactly a conventional - or indeed safe- pastime, but not teaching her to drive only meant that once Ellie wanted to learn, she was dangerously inexperienced anyway! And look where that got her. With her driving license, of course (since Ellie, as her dad loved to brag, "succeeded in everything she put her mind to"), but with her friends a now orphaned teen with what seemed to be a world (or at least city) domination problem, a hardened criminal currently in hospital, soon to be jail with a bullet through her side because of her, and two mechanic - slash racers on the run, and a boyfriend (well, would-be, since they never defined the relationship, but an ex now involuntarily)being forced by her dad to leave the country at gunpoint.

The boyfriend who had taught her how to drive. Who had cared about her over the safety of his crew, or even being put in jail. Who had guided her through her first... everything, really. First kiss, first car, first heist - whenever Ellie needed him, he was there. And most importantly, she could say next to anything around him and he would listen and give advice without judgement. Even though she had missed the comfort of her bed whilst residing in his loft, that boy was - and Ellie had a feeling always would be - where her heart lived.

'Hits me at full speed,

Feels like I can't breathe

And nobody knows'

As soon as the key had turned in the ignition, the Devore roaring to life, Ellie's breath had been knocked out of her as fast as if her car could have accelerated from 0 to 100 in a nanosecond. All she wanted to do was scream and howl at the sky, to God, to anyone who would listen to try and get them to rewrite fate so that they could be together. She wanted to cry to Riya, but she knew that her best friend no matter how much they had in common would just take her to get ice cream and tell her 'these things heal in time'. She wanted to collapse at her mothers' feet as she frequently did in her dreams, but the tightness of the heirloom bracelet at her wrist reminded Ellie that that was impossible.

Most of all, however, she wanted her fathers' understanding; that she loved and had lost just as he had all those years ago. She remembered when her dad had met him for the first time properly, the anger he had wielded towards the boy who had put her in so much danger - who had saved her from it just as many times. The disbelief on his face as she explained that she loved this 'bad boy', this 'adrenaline junkie' as she was sure her father addressed him in his mind. How the initial shock had moulded into fury at whatever 'trick' he was sure this criminal must have worked on his daughter. No, Ellie was sure he wouldn't understand for at least the next week or so.

'This pain inside me

My world is crumbling

I should have never

Let you go'

The first tear of what was to be many rolled down Ellie's already mascara-striped face as she fell to her knees. Her dad looked at her in surprise as she screamed in the middle of the street, and could see an identical tear roll down the face of the boy inciting it as he drove past the old man, wincing in guilt as the sound of his ride or die's anguish reached his ears. Had it maybe been the wrong thing to do? Had he maybe... underestimated the intensity of the teenagers' emotions? Undoubtedly, but he had to protect his daughter from going down the wrong path.

Ellie's jaw tightened as her father dared to look vaguely upset at the situation. He was the one worsening it after all. It was almost shameful of him to have judged her (literal) partner in crime so quickly. After all, when had he ever hurt her with bad intentions at heart? Ellie realised that her anger was not directed towards her father, but rather towards herself for allowing this to happen. She couldn't have stopped him leaving, but she could have made sure they were farther out of her dads' line of sight so they would have a chance of a 'proper' goodbye, whatever that was; the one year had spent with him and the crew had felt far more meaningful than any of the 18 she had gone through alone, to the point where the mere thought of goodbye was heartbreaking. And she had simply let him be treated in that way by her kin?

'I've been strong for so long, I never thought

How much I love you'

Earlier in the evening, once she had dispelled all of her nervous energy, her mind had been solely focused on bringing Shaw and The Brotherhood down. But once that had come to pass, her emotions had hit her like a ton of bricks. The Mercy Park Crew had no reason to stick around now Teppei was dead; it was time to find a new gang. For Colt and Mona, leaving had not been a choice. The latter's injury and the formers' determination to build his name in LA's criminal underworld saw to that. Saying goodbye to each of them had been no easy task, and she had half expected him to have skipped town already, to save them both the heartbreak of saying goodbye. But that had not been the case, as he had stepped out of the darkness to say one final farewell.

Tears had soaked Ellie's skin at the words he spoke, as they did now as he drove away. Her guard had been up during the heist, channelling her anger and determination to have Jason put behind bars, along with Detectives Wallace and Hester. But when she was around the crew, those she considered close enough to be family, Ellie had broken down. She had been fierce and brave then; that had been to cover up her paralysing fear of losing them again. Of losing herself again. His goodbye had hurt the most, like a slap to the face, short and painful but with lasting effects.

Throughout the brief conversation, their relationship had played through her mind; not just from her perspective, but what it must have been like for him. How on that day, what seemed to be casual flirting and general friendliness must have been tiptoeing through a minefield for him. A single wrong move and the whole crew could be placed at risk. The initial shock and rush when driving from the cops leading to the beginning of their relationship. How in each moment Ellie fell deeper in love with him, he was doing the same, only that feeling of freefalling was paired with the guilt of tricking her, and the fear of letting her in at the risk of his emotions and her safety - concerns which were not calmed by certain complications they had run into along the way. This myriad of memories only emphasised the emptiness Ellie felt in her heart now.

'Standing on the platform, watching you go.

You said, "I wanna see the world" and I said "Go"'

As Ellie felt the tarmac of the sidewalk dig into her knees and tears roll down her face, she watched as the car she knew so well turned into the next street. When the car swung around, she caught a glimpse of its driver, his eyes trained on hers, smiling weakly through tear-filled eyes. Regret was written undeniably in his gaze, but he was trying to put on a brave face for her to remember him by. Trademark. A thought that once would have put a grin on Ellie's face now caused her to sob in sorrow, grieving the little moments that comfortably passed between them that she was sure could not be replicated with anyone else. She shot him back a brief smile, equally bittersweet in the less than perfect moment, and the last words he said to her echoed in her mind.

"Give 'em hell, troublemaker"

His car finally moved out of sight, and Ellie suddenly felt the repressed need to call out for him spring out in full force; now that her father had walked inside she felt less pressured to avoid the elephant in the room, at least out loud.

"Logan..." she choked out to no one in particular, as she rubbed her road marked knees the way he would have done and slowly got up.

Later, after she had deleted their messages from her phone and laid in her bed in silence, she took off the necklace from around her neck and placed it on the adjourned pillow. "Logan." Ellie whispered to herself as if in the affirmation that he had been real.

She had been lucky to know him. Too bad there wasn't a next time to be ready for.

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dreamingsushi · 4 years

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The King: Eternal Monarch - Episode 3

So I did watch the episode last Friday, but couldn’t type my reaction before today. Well I could have, but I chose not to because moping around and pretending being a larva was an interesting state of mind. I was actually looking forward to the next episode, I couldn’t have waited any longer before satisfying my curiosity about where is this all going. So sit down, take your pop corn and enjoy. Food is mandatory for this drama, trust me. You HAVE to eat when you watch it.

The guys are waiting for Tae Eul at the fried chiken place but then she sends a message saying not to wait for her, she’s not coming, which is quite surprising for them. Seems like she must like a lot fried chicken and beer. We do too. Honestly, now I am afraid to keep watching this because it makes me crave fried chicken and beer. So much. Which is kind of cruel to me because of isolation since there are no Korean restaurant near my house. Like NONE.

Which brings us back to Lee Gon telling Tae Eul he’s going to take her as his queen. She’s not buying it. And then he tells her she’s like his favorite number, which is zero, because it’s amounted to nothing but has absolute power. And he rambles on mathematical stuff. Wow, if it was me I would have sent him away, or maybe just have gone for the fried chicken, I do not need to be told about maths, especially not on such a boring tone. And being compared to 0 isn’t a compliment. He needs to change his flirting techniques. Okay, it still turns out to be a little cuter than I expected., he says he is powerless here because she doesn’t really care for him, but it’s okay because she’s greater than what he expected her to be. Then she’s lire are you done speaking nonsense, he says she’s stupid like a bear. Which is weird. Then she tells him to take her to this parallel universe of his. So he takes her to the bamboo forest. But the obelisques won’t show on that day, nope. Not convincing Tae Eul with any of those details, she’s more upset that he took her into the woods like that when it’s freezing cold. She tells him the results of his DNA tests are about to come out and hopefully they will find him some relatives. And she tells him to stop calling Eun Seop. He tells her that even if she found a relative based on his DNA, they won’t be his real family. He says his parents died when he was eight, well at least his dad, the mom probably died before that. She looks shaken. He gives her his coat and asks what’s the name of the guy she calls brother, he knows she’s an only child so he’s not her brother. She asks him what’s his name, how come he can ask people’s names when doesn’t tell his? He said that she can call him by his name even if she knows, he didn’t say he can’t tell nor that he doesn’t have one. She gets angry and walks away first. And she ignores him.

So cute. Taekwondo guy (that would be the guy she calls brother, but he was studying Taekwondo at her dad’s school) keeps on waiting for Tae Eul to come back and starts talking to the horse. Then he notices a symbol on the saddle. Which corresponds to a drawing in his block note. Which looks so much like a Canadian passport somehow.

So granny is hiring Jo Yeong’s fangirl. Partly because she liked the fanfics she wrote. Also because she applied for like the past four years. But this is priceless. The granny reading fanfics and talking about hashtags, knowing more stuff than I do. I am living it.

So seems like the Prime minister and Lee Gon are on some sort of competition? I didn’t get it really. I guess they didn’t agree on political stuff? I don’t know, don’t ask me. Madam the prime minister is unhappy though that the king disappeared. Oh okay, so basically, since the king started paying taxes, it would look bad if they in the party got a raise so she has been opposed to that to keep popularity amongst the people, which makes the ministers unhappy. She puts them all back into place. Fierce woman.

They finally get a new member the police unit team. And they kind of made it funny, well it’s very cliché, but basically a guy looking like a thug comes in with an handsome guy and of course they all think the latter is the newbie, but it’s actually the first one who is in fact younger than what he looks like, a little dumb but in a cute way, is nicknamed rose and has unicorn in his email address. Nothing you would expect. Then they head out to find the weapon that was used for the murder they are investigating. In the end it’s newbie guy that finds it at the end of the day.

Some thugs try to bribe mister taekwondo. Seems he used to be really rich and when bankrupt when he was a teenage. I mean, it was most likely his parents money. His mom has lots of debts so he basically makes no salary. While he walks, he has flashback of when he was teaching taekwondo and Tae Eul’s dad tells him to stop teaching because he’s scaring the kids away. Well he indeed was scary. By the name, the name is Shin Jae. And seems like tae Eul’s dad is the one that made him chose the path of police awww.

Back at the office, Tae Eul keeps on making fun of the new recruit and then Lee Gon calls her. Eun seop gave him her work phone number. But she hangs upon him. Later, Lee Gon and Eun Seop are at the grocery store and Eun Seop is like what did you say to her for me to get handcuffed, I told you to keep it a secret. Lee Gon to comfort him appoints him as the chef of the royal guards in this universe and names him the unbreakable sword too. I’m sure Jo Yeong wouldn’t like this, Eun Seop doesn’t like it either and calls him crazy.

So lady Noh (granny) says that the King won’t come out of his study room but because he hasn’t showed up in public people start to think maybe he is ill. The new girl says she has a solution and meets privately with Jo Yeong. It seems she opens an SNS account for him. Which gains a lot of popularity.

Lady Noh asks Jo Yeong to investigate the lady from the ID card, however he tells her he already did that on demand of His majesty and that girl simply doesn’t exist.

The results of Lee Gon’s DNA test came out and they match to nobody. She then receives a call about the horse: that kind of horse isn’t even in South Korea right now, so it wouldn’t be a stolen horse.

They go for beer and fried chicken. AGAIN. I hate this drama so much. Stop making me craving fried chicken! With beer. I am trying to eat healthy. And to go vegan, slowly but surely. Stop this torture now! Anyways, she takes a shot and asks him if he’s from another world and who else could have taken that portal. He says he can’t tell her unless she becomes a member of his court, which makes her annoyed again. He guesses she got nothing from his DNA tests, but still can’t trust him. And she says they leave? BUUUUT, they didn’t even eat the chicken. WHYYYYY? The chicken did nothing wrong, it HAS to be eaten...

Lee Gon orders to eat the carrots Tae Eul feeds him. He’s so happy. I don’t know why.

Jo Yeong goes to Lee Gon’s office. He remembers of His highness always looking into the autopsie of Lee Rim. He feels there’s something fishy and that Lee Rim isn’t dead. And it seems Jo Yeong guesses it’s related to Lee Gon’s disappearing. Well, kind of.

There’s a storm and Lee Gon has something going on with his shoulder.

Le Rim is back in the Kingdom of Corea. I guess you need the storm and the flute to go back?

Tae Eul has little problem with her car an Lee Gon comes to the rescue, but while she starts tying her hair up, time freezes, except for him. I am not convinced by the time freezing thingy. Lite not at all. It’s enough already with the uncle not aging up and the parallel universes... I hope they don’t make it too much... Because so far, this is good. Anyways. She leaves asking to watch for her car that is broken and he just drives away with it. He goes to the bamboo forest and the door is there, so he finally realizes the flute is the key.

Back in kingdom of Corea, seems like Lee Rim has his little army.

They got the result from the forensic team, which incriminates the suspect, but Tae Eul feels it’s falling into place too perfectly, as if it was planned. So they go to investigate and Shin Jae and Tae Eul bumps into a bad guy Shin Jae sent to jail some years ago. And bad ass fighting! Yeaaah!!!! With Lee Gon as a witness, until big boss is about to stab Shin Jae, so he gets targetted while saving taekwondo boy and kicks everyone’s asses with his whip. Lol. Shin Jae and Tae Eul were having a hard time, but just one hit from the whip master and BAM! Over. Shin Jae and Lee Gon fights a little. Shin Jae and Tae Eul shares a popsicle, Lee Gon feels forgotten. They have lunch together and then Lee Gon bids his farewell to Tae Eul because he’s going back to his world.

Shin Jae drives Lee Gon back and asks him the company who made the saddle for Maximus. Of course Lee Gon doesn’t know. He asks about the logo on it and Lee Gon tells him it doesn’t exist here, because it’s for his kingdom in another world.

When Tae Eul comes back home, no more Maximus, they are going back. And like what? He’s already in love with her? Well, has he made it to his world? We will know next week I guess! From the previews though, it looks like he made it and goes back to his loved girl too. I like that the plot of this is quite clear, we know where we are going at least roughly and I enjoy that in those times of uncertainty.

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acs0qbzk-blog · 5 years

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Health insurance system in Belgium?

Hello All, I am looking to relocate in Belgium and I have a question. Can anyone help me please: Is there a knee cartilage transplant surgery covered by the health insurance in Belgium, or I would need to pay it myself? How about an arthroscopy just to clean the joint of loose bodies? Many thanks!

BEST ANSWER: Try this site where you can compare free quotes :tipsinsurance.xyz

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hiyo-silver · 5 years

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Dear Blue Birb, - Buzz and Woody

Summary: The losers all go to Stan's Halloween party donning very fitting costumes, with Eddie and Bill matching as usual. Bill drinks to drone out Martin's voice, later seeing Stan making out with a girl from school and promptly going home.

Chapters 1 2 3 4 5 6 + ao3

Taglist: @fuckboykaspbrak @thesquidliesthuman @rachi0964 @beepbeep-losers @bigbilliamdenbro @jalenrose1122 @sleepygaybrough @itandstrangerthingsfanfic @boopboopbichie @peachywyatt @aizeninlefox @sockwantstodie @ahoybyeler @s-tanleyuris @yooonbum

The night of the party comes, the amazon packages of Eddie and Bill’s costume pieces trickled in slowly through the week and thankfully they all come on time for the night of October 31st. Bill looks himself in the mirror with his cowboy hat and spurs, the cow print definitely something he’s not used to but makes for a good costume.

“There’s a snake in my boot,” Bill says to his reflection, trying to match the accent and vernacular of the iconic character, the movie of his late elementary school aged self. He tips the hat and leans back to rest only the heel of his right foot on the group, giving a sly smirk and an attempt at a wink. Okay, maybe he just won’t wink at all tonight. He rolls his eyes at himself, picking up his brown faux leather jacket from the bed. Eddie hates this jacket, Bill had purchased it at a thrift store, Eddie could scream for hours about how bad and unsanitary that decision was, but Bill still likes the jacket.

He slips it over his shoulders, starting his way out of the room and down the stairs in his comically clompy boots. He purposefully scuffs his heels all the way down the driveway to the street where his car is parked. He turns his music up, a Halloween playlist Richie made way back in fifth grade. It’s basically iconic now, another loser tradition to listen to around the season of candy and tie-dyed looking trees.

The low grumble of his motor serves as a comfort at this point. His car always sounds like it has the lungs of a smoker, not unlike his Grandma Lou who he only sees around summertime when she and his grandfather come up from Bangour. He drives down the street, it only takes a while to arrive at Bev’s. A small scowl tempts him when he sees Martin on the porch with her already. He promised he’d be nice, he always keeps his promises. But he doesn’t usually make promises he isn’t sure he can keep. Beverly begging him to be kind was just too much to admit defeat to.

The bubbly redhead climbs into the back seat with Martin. Thank God the boy took the hint and follows her into the back instead of deciding the front would be a good spot for him. Bill probably would die if he needed to sit up front with Martin. His skin already crawls when the teen speaks to him, he really hates feeling so mean but he knows it stems purely from his discomfort, the feeling of unsafety. For all he knows, Martin could tell anyone at any time, and Bill simply cannot have that.

“What song is this? It sounds straight out of 2011,” Martin asks, his tone more critical than Bill feels ready to deal with. He glances back before starting the car again, only realizing then that Martin’s costume includes nothing but a short black dress with words taped all over it, not even to mention the scraggly looking fake white beard hooked over his ears with elastic.

“It is from 2011, it’s a playlist one of our friends made several years ago, it’s legendary, and no, I won’t turn it off,” Bill says, his own tone short and frustrated, he doesn’t really like his plans to change. He’s clung to his friends for a reason. They have always been kind and there for him. They care for him a way his family simply doesn’t, by now he can admit it. And Martin Addison does not have anywhere near the right to change any of this, he’s only an asshole that Bill needs to keep happy so his own private information stays private.

“Alright,” Martin sighs, lifting his arms at the elbows in defeat, nobody really expects quiet Bill Denbrough to snap on them, especially when the losers are around. Usually, if Bill is going to scold someone or be rude, he makes a point to keep that away from his friends. They’re too positive a piece in his life now to want to taint that with his sour attitude.

Bev raises her eyebrows, giving him a look through poking her head up to be visible in the rearview mirror, giving him a disappointed look. Bill would be fine if she was mad, but disappointed is what he can’t deal with. “We’re picking Mike up next and then Ben on the way back in the direction of Stan’s place,” he changes the topic, not knowing how else he could possibly diffuse the situation.

“Alright, Billyboy,” Bev sighs. She doesn’t appreciate his avoidance, he could have apologized. If only she knew how Martin had been to Bill in private, maybe she’d understand the seemingly random aggression coming from her fellow redheaded friend.

Bill turns the dial up for the music to play louder, rolling his window down a crack, thinking briefly about taking his hat off to feel the wind in his hair, but decides against the possible hat hair situation he has going on. He presses harder on the gas pedal, the car humming louder and the air whipping in through the window with a choppy sound that Bill is so used to that he hardly notices. He likes the feeling of the wind in his face and coursing through his hair. It’s a main reason he always pumped his legs so hard on that old bike of his, now gathering dust in the garage, subject to being the base of many spider homes.

He rolls up in front of Mike’s farm, the radio playing loudly being enough to signal Mike to come out. The boy comes out in a scarecrow costume, a bright orange face paint triangle drawn onto his nose, a green circle on his right cheekbone to be a patch of fabric. It honestly really does look really cute on him, the colors stand out bright on his skin and it looks especially good on him.

He cringes a bit at seeing Martin in the back and hearing how loud Bill is playing the music, he immediately knows what’s up. He slides into the passenger seat up front with Bill, not liking Martin much himself. Hopefully Bill can help him not have to deal with him through the night. Ben and Eddie and Stan and Richie all seem not to mind Martin, it’s only Mike and Bill who are bothered, and Mike doesn’t even know why the latter is bothered by him.

“We’re gonna go get Ben now, you sure Stan will appreciate your costume scaring away all the birds in your yard?” Bill jokes, nudging Mike in the arm teasingly before he turns back to pull out of Mike’s driveway. Pulling out of this driveway is genuinely a skill, seeing how long and bumpy it is, but with Bill often being the losers’ driver he’s definitely mastered this skill. “I do like the costume by the way, it’s cute on you,” Bill smiles softly.

“Thanks,” Mike says with his own happy smile. Halloween is one of the losers favorite holidays. They don’t need to be cool on Halloween. “Ah, we’ll have to tell Stan not to worry, I look too friendly to scare anything off,” he says with a very Mike-esc smirk. Mike has an easy smile to go along with, having smooth teeth and a little gap between the bottom two. It gives his smile the most contagious aura among the losers.

“I wonder what Ben decided to dress as, I can assume you can already tell what Eddie’s gonna be,” he chuckles to himself, keeping his eyes on the part of the road that his headlights illuminate. He’s a careful driver. The stutter he had as a kid was apparently caused by a car accident when he was three years old, or so his mother always ingrained into his young head up until the point when she felt she no longer had to warn him, he was hardly into double digits when he understood the full danger of two things, cars and pedophiles.

“Probably something cute, I think it’s kinda funny, as kids we always wanted to be scary,” Bev chuckles, though she shouldn’t be talking in her flowy short white dress and angel wings. She’s seen the pictures of the young boys in their vampire and zombie costumes, bottles of fake blood and latex, wanting to scare some other unsuspecting kid in a way that would have Eddie pissing himself at that point in life. “It’s like we always wanted to be older but now we just want to grow downwards. Taxes are gonna be so lame next year,” she says, her voice far away and wistful.

Martin, being the kiss-ass he is, immediately starts laughing at the joke, it wasn’t even much of a joke but he’s trying so hard to impress her that he’ll take it as one to please her, she looks confused for a moment but his hyena cackle draws her in, bringing out her own giggle to the sounds of the car.

Bill finally pulls into the driveway of Ben’s bungalow home, waiting for the boy to come on out, his form covered by a thin linen sheet, holes cut for his eyes so he can see. It’s the most classic of costumes, sounds exactly like something Ben would do. This isn’t the first year he’s worn this costume. This was obviously a fresh sheet but it’s the third time (not consecutively, Ben decides that would be just sad) that he’s donned the same persona on the night of October 31st.

“Happy Halloween!” he says brightly as he slides into the backseat of the car, lifting the sheet so he can talk without the white fabric muffling his words. He lets his sheet fall again before buckling into his seat, pushing Bev into the middle seat next to Martin.

“Happy Halloween!” Bill returns, “Who’s ready to go party until we regret it?” he smiles to his crowd in the back seat, the company of his actual friends diffusing his anger about Martin, just as he’d hoped they would. He’s always grateful for them, but especially in times like this.

“Yeah!” the group choruses as he finally pulls out of the Hanscom driveway to bring the group to Stan’s place. This is their first year not going trick or treating, but surprisingly not their first year with plans to go through with getting shitfaced on the night of spooks and ghouls.

The outside of the Uris residence is not often decorated for the Halloween season, Andrea always makes jokes about how she’s “too good of Jew” to decorate the home with such things only about a month off of the start of Hanukkah. It’s entirely a joke though, she and Stan just have never been the type to decorate the outside of the house, it would never get taken down in that case. It would be too exciting to put up but taking it down would just fill the mother son duo from their holiday high.

The gang files all out of the car, stumbly and laughing enough that they could probably be taken as already drunk, but it’s only the attitude they have around each other. Bill takes the initiative to knock on the thick door, already hearing the beat of music inside, Bill knows they’re late, it’s in his brand to drop his group off slightly later than he should, it just means the party has already started.

Stan himself comes to the door, his dark hair slicked back with gel that makes it shine in the light of the chandelier in his foyer. His leather jacket holds a similar glisten. He’s dressed as a greaser, which totally makes sense, considering his recent love for the book The Outsiders, and damn does he look good like that with his olive-y toned skin and hazel eyes.

The group shoves their way in at his invitation, Stan himself sliding to the side to make way for them, the most of the party going on in the living room. Youtube is up on the television playing music, currently on some iconic pop song of the last two months. The teens in the living room are grooving around to the music, a few with cups in their hands, reeking of alcohol and disappointment. The cups aren’t even the iconic party red solo cup, they’re actual glasses from Stanley’s kitchen, he’s never been much of a party thrower and aside from the alcohol, he didn’t know what else he was supposed to provide for his guests.

Bill goes off on his own already, Stan’s home is more than familiar to him, he’s been here quite a few times. He grabs a green plastic kids cup that he’s probably has owned since his childhood. Bill doesn’t trust himself with booze and something glass, he’s sure to drop it when the beer goggles kick in and he loses his balance.

He pours himself only a bit, he knows he’s a lightweight, he hardly drinks. He’s what many of the kids would call “mostly preppy”. He behaves himself and most of his rebellion comes with due cause and wouldn’t harm anything but himself. He returns to the living room with his cub, cringing at the taste of the beer, he would never admit that he often goes for something smoother and fruitier, but obviously Stanley Uris would have absolutely no knowledge of the tastes of alcohols. He may be providing the drink, but this is his first time ever not being sober at a party, and only because it feels safe in the confines of his own home.

It surely takes time, but Bill finds himself even drinking more whenever Martin speaks. It’s like a drinking game, whenever he hears the awful screeching sound of that man’s voice, he takes another long gulp off of his drink. He doesn’t know how they end up outside, but some kids are playing beer pong, as soon as they lose interest Bill finds himself shoving Bev’s arm incessentely, “Bev- Bev, B-Bev, Bev, can we play?” he begs in his less than fully coherent state.

She only smiles, drinking from her own glass, her expression warm like the buzz flowing through her veins. “Good idea Billy!” she exclaims, holding onto his arm to guide him to the table, she honestly worries more about his sobriety than her own, though she also isn’t the one who’s been drinking to drown out someone in specific.

They hardly make it to the table before Bill places a kiss to Beverly’s cheek and goes to stand on the other side, he doesn’t even know why he kissed her, it’s like if he drank enough to make everything swirly it makes his mind turn a little bit straight. The thought of swirling colors and lines dancing around behind his eyes makes him laugh to himself. He just continues proving how much of a lightweight he is to his peers still hanging out and talking around him. Heck, it’s the first party of the year, they’re probably just as shitfaced.

Martin is definitely equally as bad, taking his spot next to Bev on their side of the table, it’s like a given that he’s playing on her team. Mike takes a spot off to the side when he sees Stan stand beside Bill, knowing full well that none of the white boys at the table even fit their own stereotype of knowing at all how to play beer pong and finding a bit of humor in watching Bev try and explain it, her hands moving wildly with the waves of her voice.

He stays sober, knowing his mom would have him by the earlobes if he came home more than a little tipsy, and he fully respects his mama. He also doesn’t doubt that he’ll need to drive the others home in Bill’s car, having his license on him, he knows Eddie will also be sober, but Sonia Kaspbrak has way too much against Eddie learning to drive. She claims it’s about safety but really it’s probably about how he hungers for independence.

Bev finally makes her first shot, Bill as her opponent. The white plastic ball bounces with little whacks against the table, plopping luckily right into the cup, making Bill groan. “Sooo, I gotta take a drink now?” he asks, already having forgotten the rules of the game. Bev nods with a devilish grin that fully contradicts her angel costume, Bill lifting the cup to his lips to let some of the gross liquid run it’s way down his throat. He gags and looks over to hear a whooping cheer coming from a familiar voice, he could hear it anywhere.

The losers usually keep their costumes secret until the day of if they don’t get too excited and spill about them. They’re all glad Richie didn’t tell him about this costume, thankful they didn’t have to imagine this sight until the exact moment they spot him behind them in Stan’s backyard. It almost looks like he didn’t even know his own costume himself until today, signature Richie.

He dons a yellow cropped tank and some shorts, already missing his shoes, they’d been some tall black boots that his intoxicated self simply couldn’t walk in. On his head rest a pair of black swimming goggles, his hair up in a ponytail on the top of his head to try and mimic the small bits of hair that minions have on his head. It’s only cemented and proven by the name tag plastered right above his belly button. “Hi, my name is.. Bob the Minion” and it’s the only piece of the look that makes it obvious, they’d otherwise be at a loss.

“Go Beverllyyyyyyy!” he shouts in a slurred tone, his voice ringing through the backyard, having everyone looking in his direction, the neighbors probably even hear him so Stan shushes him almost as loudly as Richie’s original shout.

“Beep beeep Rich,” Stan grumbles, rubbing his face to try and gain some clarity. Being himself, he really doesn’t like how alcohol makes him feel. He doesn’t like the minimal control his brain actually has as he’s under the influence. This will definitely be his last time being drunk for quite a long time, thankfully his first time is enough to teach him.

Richie takes the shushing with the utmost importance, having the tendency to shift in and out of seriousness when he’s been drinking, a very unique drinking personality, though the losers attribute it to that he already damn near acts drunk when he’s not under the influence of anything at all.

The games goes on, Mike deciding to cheer on Bill and Stan’s side seeing as Richie obviously took Bev and Martin’s, he just wants everyone to feel supported. At one point Stan walks away and nobody notices. Finally it comes to Stan’s turn and their beer fuzzy minds realized he’s disappeared off somewhere else, which prompts Bill to announce that he’ll go seek him out.

Bill finds his way up the stairs, clinging onto the railing to keep his jelly legs upright. He goes to Stan’s room, opening the door as he sings the other boy’s name. Fuck, the gay comes out when he’s wasted. “Stannnnyyy~” he coos, peeking in and seeing Stan’s hands up a girl’s shirt, their lips locked together, lips pulling at each other. The two look back at Bill in shock as he catches them, and Bill pulls the door shut as fast as he can. He stumbles right back down the stairs until he finds his Buzz counterpart again, damn near crying.

“Eddie, take me home, I’m drunk,” he demands, looping his arms around Eddie’s waist and dropping his head to rest on Eddie’s shoulder. Eddie hugs in return, taken aback by Bill’s state. Even as his best friend, he doesn’t see him like this much. Bill gets all clingy when he’s sad but it can also been seen as just his drunkness so Eddie doesn’t see it entirely as cause for alarm, simply taking Bill’s hand to guide him.

“Hey, let’s go find Mike, he said he’d drive us if you couldn’t,” he says in a hushed voice, imagining that being that intoxicated must be almost like sensory overload, which he knows quite too well with his anxiety. He pulls Bill close to him as he maneuvers around the other teens, taking him outside where he last remembers mike being, hopefully well on his way to finding them a ride home, he just wants to get some water and sleep into his friend so he’d be ready for school again by the time Monday comes.

He finds Mike sitting on the outdoor table, not on a chair, those are all taken, but on the table with his legs hanging over the edge of it, swinging them back and forth to hear the crunch of the straw tucked into various places of his costume. He looks right over at Eddie and Bill with concern lacing his face, his eyebrows drawn together. Eddie explains that he’s absolutely not letting Bill behind the wheel like this, Mike understands and agrees wholeheartedly to drive them back to the Denbrough house.

Eddie thanks Mike for taking them back to Bill’s house, feeling awful for Mike having to walk back to Stan’s since Bill will need his car, especially once he needs to get Eddie home the next morning. Nevertheless, he pulls Bill on into the house, his parents thankfully already in bed, it’s past midnight by now, so Eddie doesn’t take very long to get Bill up the stairs and into bed finally. It takes the time it does only because Bill is uncooperative.

He pushes Bill onto his bed, bouncing back as he hits the mattress, that limp and pliant now that he doesn’t fight back anymore now that he’s in bed, it’s almost like he felt like he had to work against Eddie to get what he wanted, his mind is too hazy to understand. Eddie disappears for a moment, coming back up with a tall glass of water, coaxing Bill into a sitting position. “C’mon, asshole, you need water.” he pushes him up from behind to get him back into a vertical position.

Eddie tilts the glass to Bill’s lips letting the liquid run down his throat, trying to get him to drink the whole thing. He doesn’t want a hungover Bill the next day. Bill only whines a little at not getting to lay down anymore. Finally Eddie gets him to down the glass and lets him lay down again. He takes Bill’s hat off and removes his shoes and socks, good enough. He won’t be dehydrated or too overheated.

He takes off his own costume fully, taking some of Bill’s pajamas from the drawer across the room, a grey v-neck and some red flannel pajama pants. He crawls into bed next to Bill like he does when he sleeps over on a normal night, chuckling a bit at Bill when he sees him drooling, shaking him awake a little, “I’m lonely,” he says softly.

Bill blinks his eyes open, reaching an arm around Eddie carefully, looking for affection himself after what he saw earlier, and it’s not so different from normal. “I’m here Edward,” he says with a little smile to him, enjoying the sleepy warmth he can leach off Eddie.

“You ever just, think about how in love you are with someone?” Eddie asks, a dreamy look on his gentle face. He rubs Bill’s arm comfortingly. “I’ve been in love with a friend for a long time, it’s really dumb though.”

Bill only nods, holding loosely but close at the same time, nodding off again, snoring even before he can respond to Eddie’s words. Eddie smiles softly, seeing him comfortable being enough. He doesn’t need an answer.

He wishes he could explain further that he’s in love with him, with Bill. but he doesn’t want to wake him again. So he simply decides to sleep himself as well.

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sunyoonandstars · 6 years

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BTS Oneshot || Autumn Leaves || You x (Jealous) Yoongi (feat. Jimin)

This is based on another of your lovely requests. ☺️ Since it was rather vague, I decided to take some artistic liberty with it. I hope you like it nonetheless! 😌💗

Scenario Having discovered that he may have finally succeeded in pushing you away and most likely lost you to his best friend, Yoongi spirals downwards into a vortex of jealousy and self-hatred ...

angst, fluff, light smut

word count 2.799

Of course.

Of course, Park Jimin would come to your rescue. And of course, you gladly accepted his consolation and companionship, Min Yoongi thinks to himself as he spins around in his black leather armchair.

Park Jimin. The angel. Your knight in shining armor. He would never be able to be that person for you. He had told you that from the start.

„I don’t want that. And I don’t need that“, you had claimed back then. „I can save myself. And I want only you, Min Yoongi, nobody else.“

Now, these words echo in the back of Yoongi’s mind as if they’re taunting him, reverberating in your crystal clear voice, its sound cutting his heart like a dagger. And he remembers. The look you gave him, the expression in your deep, serious eyes that day when you promised you’d always stay by his side. The eyes he had fallen in love with. A love he knew all along wasn’t his to keep.

It was just a matter of time. And now the time is here, apparently. To part ways. To let you go. Because, in the end, he’s not enough, just as expected.

Thanks for requesting! Hope you enjoy it! ☺️💗

Autumn Leaves

„Min Yoongi“, you sigh into your phone’s receiver, leaving what is, in fact, the fifth but feels like the hundredth voicemail message within an hour. „I’m on my way to the restaurant now, and since I didn’t feel like eating out alone today but didn’t wanna let our reservation go to waist, either, I asked Jimin if he’d come. And he’s waiting for me there. So. Just saying. I’m having dinner with Jiminie. I hope that’s okay with you? Since I couldn’t really ask you. Because you were, you know, not picking up your phone and all. Anyway. I hope you’re making progress on your song and that you at least had one decent meal today. Call me later if you feel like it. I’ll pick up. Promise. I’m not mad, baby. Just a little pissed. Love you. Bye.“

You hang up just as the restaurant comes in sight, an obviously anxious Jimin waiting by the front entrance. He’s nervous, you can even tell from afar by the way he’s shifting from one foot to the other uneasily, hands disappearing into the wide sleeves of his oversized jumper.

„Hi“, you wave at him, approaching the fair-haired singer at a smart pace.

„Hi, y/n“, he smiles at you, taking a welcoming step in your direction, his face gleaming under the warm street lights, sparkling eyes turning into tiny crescents.

„Did you get here all right?“, you ask as you come to a halt before Jimin, your cheeks hurting from smiling too broadly. That’s the kind of effect he usually has on you. And the reason you are the closest with him out of all the boys, except for Yoongi, of course. Jimin makes you feel warm and welcome, appreciated and seen. „I’m sorry, I know this was a little spontaneous, but I just couldn’t bear the thought of sitting all by myself at an empty table and waiting for someone who won’t come after all.“

„Don’t worry, y/n“, he instantly brushes off your concern. „It’s no trouble at all. I was hungry anyway. And today’s my cheat day, so, this couldn’t have come at a better time. You’re actually doing me a huge favor, y/n. Because I was longing for fresh air and stimulating company tonight. And none of the guys felt like going out.“

He shrugs, a sweet grin still stretching his luscious lips.

„Well, in that case“, you laugh. „I’m glad we could help each other out.“

„That’s right. That’s what this is. Nothing more than a service between friends. A fun night out. Let’s have a good time, y/n. Leave your worries at the door and follow me inside“, he offers you his arm, bowing in a gentlemanly manner.

„Thank you very much, Sir“, you happily accept it, hardly able to stifle a giggle as you enter the restaurant.

The hours fly by as the both of you enjoy the exquisite cuisine as well as each other’s company. Soon, you have arrived at the last course of your shared meal, a delicious dessert composed of strawberry tiramisu and a beautiful bouquet of delicate edible flowers coated in confectioner’s sugar.

„Woah, it looks so pretty!“, you exclaim, eyes as big as dinner plates and both hands pressed to your parted lips in a rapture. „I feel almost sorry for even considering to eat it.“

Only when you look up at Jimin do you notice that he was secretly taking pictures of you and your, in his words, ‚adorable reaction‘ to the artfully arranged dessert all along.

„Yah! Jimin-ah! Put away the camera!“, you scold him, a furious pink tainting your cheeks as you turn away to hide your face behind a protective curtain of hair. It’s then that you notice a familiar figure out of the corner of your eye, quickly disappearing from your sight and the restaurant’s front window.

You can feel your heart skip a beat, your throat tighten, and burning heat shoot up your neck and right into your head.

„What? What is it, y/n?“, Jimin asks, sounding alarmed, when you suddenly jump to your feet, almost knocking over your chair in the process.

„Y/n!?“, he calls after you as you grab your coat and leave the restaurant in a hurry, dashing past a startled waitress, nearly tipping over the champagne glasses she is carefully balancing on her tray in passing, paying no mind to the turning heads and curious looks following you.

„Yoongi!“, you cry out as soon as you stumble outside and into the fresh spring air. „Wait, Yoongi!“

But you can barely even still make out his black-jacketed frame disappearing into the night at the far end of the street. Nonetheless, you race after him, Yoongi’s step never once slowing, even accelerating, his head ducked between hunched shoulders, bleached hair glowing in the dark, catching and reflecting the light of the street lamps, bopping up and down like a lost cherry blossom caught in a breeze. Without hesitating, you shuffle off your heels and keep running. Barefooted. Until your lungs ache and you’re forced to witness Yoongi slide into the backseat of a taxi right before of you, not even throwing you as much as another glance.

„Fuck!“, you scream into the night as you watch the cab drive off, bent over, clutching your cramping side.

„What? What’s wrong, y/n?“, Jimin asks, having caught up with you, panting. „What happened? What’d I miss?“

„Fuck, fuck, fuck!“, you curse under your breath, ramming a fist into your knee. „Shit!“

„Calm down, y/n“, Jimin adjures you, squatting down in front of you in an effort to make eye contact, both hands placed on your shoulders, soothingly rubbing them. „It’s all right, I’m here. Talk to me. What’s the matter, y/n? Why did you run out of there like that?“

„Yoongi“, you simply sigh, pointing towards the direction the taxi took off in. „He saw us. And I’m afraid he got a wrong idea or something. You should have seen him, Jiminie. You know how he can get when he’s —“

You pause, eyes bashfully cast down.

„When he gets jealous?“, Jimin finishes your sentence, suggestively raising both brows.

„Yes“, you meekly nod.

„Well, didn’t you tell him you’d have dinner with me?“

„I did. But since he neither read or answered any of my texts all day long nor took any of my calls, I have no idea if he even got the message I left on his voicemail.“

„And you were originally meant to meet with him here?“

„Yes, I was. It was supposed to be a date. For our two-year-anniversary. But since I hadn’t heard anything from him in three days I just assumed he forgot.“

„Oh, y/n“, Jimin shakes his head, breathing out a deep sigh while running a hand through his sleek, blond hair.

„Yeah, I know“, you admit, disheartened, guilt having gotten a lock on your heart.

„You better go talk to him. Or at least try“, he shrugs, forcing an encouraging smile. „Even though he’s probably locked up in his studio again by now. Still, it’s worth a try. After all, Yoongi-Hyung is a rather reasonable person. And he loves you. He’ll listen.“

„I hope so“, you whisper, more to yourself, as you turn away to hail a cab.

„Sorry, Jimin, for just taking off like that. It’s neither fair nor polite after having asked you to come, but I need to make sure Yoongi’s all right.“

„I get it, I get it“, he eagerly nods. „Don’t worry about it, y/n.“

The corners of his mouth turning up reassuringly, Jimin looks down at you as he holds the car door open.

„Should I come with you? Talk him down first, maybe?“

„No, thank you“, you decline, scarcely managing a grateful smile, all the while avoiding his searching glance. „I don’t think that’s a good idea. The last thing I want is for him to take his anger out on you, Jimin. This is my fault. I’m gonna deal with it. I’m sure Yoongi won’t do anything stupid. I won’t let him anyway. I won’t ever let him do anything he might regret one day.“

„Good, good“, Jimin nods, now firmly holding your gaze, his eyes speaking of the shared affection for the broody rapper the two of you love so much, both in your own ways. „I’m glad he has you, y/n. And I hope he sees that, too.“

„Thanks, Jiminie. You’re so sweet. Get home safely.“

„I will, thank you. Don’t worry about me. Just take care of Yoongi-Hyung. He needs you right now. Even though he might not know it.“

With a sigh you pull the car door shut, quickly rolling down the window and poking your head out, though, when a thought suddenly comes to mind.

„Wait! Jimin-ah! The bill! Did you pay it? At the restaurant?“

Jimin, already on his way back to fetch his jacket, probably, stops cold in his step, both hands shoved into the pockets of his black skinny jeans, his round shoulders slouched over.

„What?”, he turns around, questioningly raising a brow. “The bill?“

„Yes. Did you pay already? I completely forgot —“

„Don’t worry, y/n“, he cuts you off in mid-sentence, his bright smile not reaching his eyes. „I settled it. It’s fine. My treat.“

„No way, Park!“, you shout back, leaning out of the car window, the taxi slowly starting to move. „I’ll wire you the money first thing tomorrow morning! I dragged you here, after all. Send me a pic of the bill. Don’t forget! I want proof!“

„All right, all right“, Jimin laughs, waving you goodbye before he turns on his heel and walks away.

On your drive over to Yoongi’s studio, you can’t help but wonder if you will, yet again, be confronted with a locked door once you get there.

Of course.

Of course, Park Jimin would come to your rescue. And of course, you gladly accepted his consolation and companionship, Min Yoongi thinks to himself as he spins around in his black leather armchair.

Park Jimin. The angel. Your knight in shining armor. He would never be able to be that person for you. He had told you that from the start.

„I don’t want that. And I don’t need that“, you had claimed back then. „I can save myself. And I want only you, Min Yoongi, nobody else.“

It was just a matter of time. And now the time is here, apparently. To part ways. To let you go. Because, in the end, he’s not enough, just as expected. And in Jimin you found someone better. Someone worthy of you and your compassionate heart.

Nonetheless, Yoongi can’t deny the fact that he feels hurt by the betrayal. How could his best friend go behind his back like that and secretly steal away his woman? He would never have picked Jimin as the type to wreck relationships. In a way, though, he should probably be grateful to him, Yoongi figures. Jimin merely proved what he was almost sure of anyway: That he isn’t right for you.

Still, he can’t help but be furious. The rage Yoongi feels, directed at himself, burns inside his chest, torching his veins.

An unexpected surge of pain originating from his left hand lets Yoongi jolt from his aimless thoughts and speculations. Through a blur of tears, teeth gritted, he stares down at his fist still tightly clenched, just like it has been ever since the very second Yoongi spotted you with Jimin in that restaurant, sitting at the table that had been meant for him and you, for your anniversary dinner. You had looked gorgeous in that dress, laughing, literally beaming, looking as happy as he hadn’t seen you in a long time. And not on account of himself but thanks to another man.

„Fuck!“, Yoongi suddenly bursts out, jumping to his feet, tears now streaming down his pale cheeks unchecked as he rams his fist into the wall right above his computer monitor.

„Yoongi!“ He almost doesn’t trust his own ears when he hears your voice call out his name. „What the hell!? What do you think you’re doing?“

Before he even has a chance to turn around and check with his own two eyes, however, Yoongi can feel your arms wrap around him from behind, closing around his waist, pulling him close to you with as much strength as you can most likely muster. Holding him tight, so tight he can barely breathe, you press your face to the small of Yoongi’s back and draw him away from his desk before he can take another swing at the wall.

„Y/n?“, Yoongi whispers, still in disbelief, his voice cracking.

„Sssshhh, you fucking idiot. Shut up. Don’t talk“, you mumble into the soft fabric of his black hoodie jacket, your low voice carrying a teary-eyed smile. „Just know that you’re stupid, Min Genius, for thinking that I’d ever leave you.“

Gently, Yoongi loosens your grip on him a little so he can turn around in your embrace and face you.

„But — I thought ...?“

„What?“, you arch your brows at him, one hand coming up to brush a few strands of bleached hair out of Yoongi’s eyes and dry his tears. „That I would take flight at the first sign of trouble? That I don’t know you by now, Min Yoongi? It’s not like this was the first time you went AWOL for a few days. I get it. You needed some time to yourself since you’re working on the new album and you’re under a lot of pressure. Sure, I was a little worried and, well, pissed that you didn’t answer any of my messages, to be honest. But I love you, Yoongi. It’s gonna take more than just a few unopened texts and a missed date to get rid of me.“

„Anniversary date“, he corrects you, emphasizing the first word, averting his gaze to avoid your own.

„You didn’t forget?“, you gasp, unable to conceal your surprise.

„Of course not!“, Yoongi instantly exclaims, brows drawing together, his rosy lips pursed into a pout.

„I just got caught up with a tricky part of this one song and kinda lost track of time and left my phone back in my room …“, he goes on to explain, his whiny tone making it hard for you to be mad at him but eliciting a smile from you instead.

„What? What are you grinning for?“, Yoongi asks, apparently confused.

„Nothing.“

You close your eyes and get up on your tiptoes to place a tender kiss on Yoongi’s soft lips which he readily reciprocates.

„But, you and Jimin —“, he begins anew after only reluctantly having broken the kiss, his eyelids still shut, a little frown creasing his pale forehead.

„We’re just friends, dumbass. You know that. Jimin adores me and loves you like a brother. And I’m a little disappointed, to be honest“, you tease him. „That you’d actually believe I’d cheat on you.“

„I didn’t. I wouldn’t“, Yoongi stammers, stiffening in your hug. „It’s not that — I was more, like — Maybe he adores you a little too much — Or you got fed up with me and —“

Smiling, you silence him with another kiss, slow and soft at first, that quickly deepens, though, growing much more ardent, demanding, and comforting in ways that words would never be.

„I missed this“, Yoongi finally whispers, short of breath, his hot lips brushing your cheek as he leans his forehead against yours, both his hands cupping your face. „I missed you, y/n. I have no idea how I even deserve you and feel like an idiot for ever having doubted you.“

With those words, Yoongi lifts you onto his slender hips, chuckling lowly as he proceeds to carry you over to his black leather sofa where he gently sets you down, lowering your body into a lying position, all the while maintaining eye contact, the intense gaze emanating from Yoongi's bottomless, dark eyes burning through your soul.

„And you’re really all mine, huh?“, he inquires, one brow shooting up, for a second there, you can’t help but notice, insecurity flaring up behind Yoongi’s dark brown orbs.

„Goes without saying“, you smile up at him as Yoongi’s body effortlessly matches your form, one of his wiry hands wandering down your chest to eagerly explore your curves. „I’m all yours.“

Thanks for reading! 💜

Here you can find my Masterlist if you feel like checking out more of my BTS fiction!

I hope you liked it. Take care and have a great day! ☺️💜

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savior-negan · 2 years

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🎁

I was listenin' to the ocean

I saw a face in the sand

But when I picked it up

Then it vanished away from my hands, down

I had a dream I was seven

Climbing my way in a tree

I saw a piece of heaven

Waiting impatient for me, down

And I was runnin' far away

Would I run off the world someday?

Nobody knows, and

I was dancing in the rain

I felt alive and I can't complain

But no, take me home

Take me home where I belong

I can't take it anymore

I was painting a picture

The picture was a painting of you and

For a moment I thought you were here

But then again, it wasn't true, down

And all this time I have been lyin'

Oh, lyin' in secret to myself

I've been putting sorrow on the farthest place on my shelf

I got no other place to go

No, take me home

Take me home where I belong

But I kept runnin'

For a soft place to fall

spotify wrapped has arrived. send me a number from 1-100 for a starter based on that song, or a lyric from it, or send a 🎁 for me to shuffle {accepting} @ourwrittenstories

It was Lucilles death anniversary and like every year before Negan traveled to his old hometown where he still owned a house at the beach which ran under her name. While his dark habit of killing the people who got too close to the ones he started to care for forced him to move across the states and sometimes even leaving the country, this place was the closest to home he ever got, or so he thought until he met Cassia.

It was no secret that he was highly obsessed about this girl. That he started to grow fond of her even if he tried his best not to let her know cause he loved the way she clung to him when she got insecure. Yes he loved her obsession about him just as much as he hated his own about her since he always promised himself to never fall in love again. Not because he was scared of the feeling itself but of what it could make out of him knowing how many lives he already took whenever he thought he found love before. It never was after Lucille. Never until now. With Cassia he lost every control he hoped he had and driving to his secret cabin on the weekend was the only way for him to breathe and calm his mind from the endless jealousy and urge to control or stalk her.

That’s why she probably wasn’t even surprised that he wasn’t home this weekend and expected him to be at his usual place, but she didn’t know that he flew across the country to visit this place of his past. What she also didn’t know and what he didn’t even thought of was the company he used to enjoy whenever he came back here: Lucy was someone he met here who lost her husband at the same time he lost Lucille and over the grief they bonded or at least did their best to drown their sorrows in sexual intercourses that worked without talking and the stupid pity they usually got.

They had never really grown close or talked outside of being here, that’s why Negan didn’t even know if she was still living here and got surprised to hear her common voice while he was sitting barefoot at the beach and wrote some lines for his new book. It could have been like always, her gentle touch on his shoulder, the way she carefully sat down next to him without a word and ended in his bed for the night. Without blame, without grief, without words and without strings attached. But this time it was different.

Negan didn’t smile at her, he didn’t even close his notebook but kept staring at the pages where he had written things he noticed about Cassia. And after all, this whole place didn’t feel like his home anymore. His home was somewhere else.

With a deep breath he got up and just as Lucy started to follow him, he raised one hand and shook his head. “No. I gotta go home.” The woman with the long blonde hair looked at him in confusion, but the smile on her face still didn’t vanish, like it never did. God how much he missed Cassias angry face.

“And I’ll accompany you.” Lucy said with determination and stepped forward, which made Negan push her back gently with his flat hand against her chest.

“It’s not my home anymore. I found somewhere I belong.”

“Somewhere or someone?”

Negan didn’t answer her question, instead he just scoffed and lowered his chin, huffing a low “I’m sorry.” before he turnt around and walked up the little hill leading to his house. Lucilles house cause it indeed didn’t feel like his anymore.

While packing his things or the few ones he unpacked at least, he grabbed his phone and dialed Cassias number. As always she was a good girl and picked up fast, giving him this nice relieving feeling in his chest that only home could bring you. Yeah, it wasn’t a place he considered his home. It was her.

“Babygirl… I changed my mind and take the next flight. Are you home? Cause there’s something I wanna tell you.” Maybe he wouldn’t tell her that she indeed became his home, but eventually she would know when he would open up about his past, about the place he went to and why. She would understand. Like she always did. “I’ll see you in three hours.” Without waiting for her response or maybe he even overheard it, he hanged up and closed the door behind him, a last guilty look over to Lucy’s house a few blocks away where she probably was watching him from the windows. Now he let her down too but… It didn’t matter. He now had some place else he belonged to. A home where he needed to be. And maybe attached strings wouldn’t feel that bad after all, not when they are so strongly attached that it feels like an embrace. A place to be. Comfort. Home. Where he belonged.

#cassia x negan || a lesson to be learnt #𝘢𝘯𝘴𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘥 {𝘮𝘺 𝘯𝘶𝘵𝘴𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘪𝘴 𝘮𝘢𝘥𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘦𝘭}#ourwrittenstories #i changed the painting part to writing for professor negan cause that’s his art form #and by writing under an alias about his lovers he makes it obvious he’s in love

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avengersohyeah · 7 years

Text

Another Stark

Masterlist

A/N : So this is a request from lovely Anon, i don’t know how to reach out to you, i hope you could find this fic. It turned out to be one long ass one shot, since i’m a sucker for reader background drama so yeah.. i hope you enjoy it (Tony x Male! Brother Reader)

When Tony lost his parents he couldn’t even feel anything. Sadness, pain, regrets, all those things came to him all at once. Numb him whole, he refused to feel any of those emotions. So he shut them out, that’s why he’s numb. Trying to forget everything by partying, drinks, women, but those things could only last for a few moments. And when he’s far away from those things, all the demons of his past creeping their way to his mind. Forcing their way to make him feel them. And at these times, he could only wish for someone. Someone to hold him close, to tell him that everything is alright.

Pepper, she’s been there with him through every sleepless night. Easing his demons away with her touch and her love for him. But that’s not enough. As hard as he denied, even with Pepper’s presence near him it still not enough. He craved for something’s different. Love, not the kind that Pepper gave him, not the kind that he gave her either. A love for people, for someone that you care more than yourself. Not the kind of love between a couple, but the kind of love you feel to your family. Pepper is his family, and all his staff he consider them as a family at some point. But that’s not enough.

Before his parents leave their house to deliver those serums, he didn’t had a chance to tell them good bye. To hug them, to tell them I love you even if he knew that they might not comeback once they drive past the gate. It’s all because of his Dad. A few days before they decided to take the serums with them is the day when he found out. His Dad slept with one of his staff. It was a night when his mother were scheduled to came home from her trip to Paris. He was going to call his Dad and ask him if he could go with him to the airport. That’s before he reached the door of Howard’s office, and heard those sounds. Moans, panting, and profanities that spilled with their heavy breath in hushed tone. Then it all hits him, He’s Dad, even if he claim that he love his mom, still couldn’t get his hands off of another woman. And since that night, he despised his father like nobody could.

14 June 1992

Somewhere across the country, a women is fighting to deliver her baby. The one she never thought would she keep. When she found out about it, it was three months after Howard’s death. So she did what she thought was right at that time. She left the mansion, handing Howard’s secretary her resignation paper. She couldn’t bare the thought that anyone that killed Howard could also go after his child if they found out. Even along the way in her nine months away from the Stark family, she managed to keep a track in Tony’s activity. For precaution, because she is that kind of women that always prepare everything to face the worst. She wrote everything that she know, in case someday her child ask and she can’t explain it with words.

16 years, and she was right about you would want to know the real story about your father. She just goes silent and hand you the box filled with envelopes of letters without address, just your name on it. You took the box and headed to your room. You read every single letters your mother wrote for you. Sadness, anger, guilt, you’re not even sure what kind of emotion you felt at that moment. You rushed to the living room and find your mother sat her, with her head on both palms and shoulders shaking. You kneel in front of her, and you bring her to your embrace while you both letting your tears flow. God how your mother has suffered. You’re not stupid, Stark, who’s apparently your brother has become the news since his parent’s death. Being the genius playboy philanthropist at young age he is draw all kind of attention from the world. But does he know he has a brother? Well half brother. Maybe not, because as what your mother wrote to you, she left without saying anything. But now at least this explained where you got this genius head of yours.

You never thought that finishing school earlier than any other kids in your age is a big deal. But apparently it is for Stark Industries. As a massive company that value young intellegent people, they keep a track in every single school in U.S for someone that is possibly could they recruit to their company. Well mostly they took a records of individuals like you, young, genius, and finish school early must be one of the requirement too. And that’s how Tony find out your existence. The day your file was handed to him as a possible recruit for science team has him shook. His mind went back to the day when he heard his Dad and your Mom in that office. He looked through your files and smile etched on his face. He doesn’t even realize he’s smiling until he felt his cheeks sore. Although he never expect it, but the fact that he still have someone out there that has Stark blood in them warmed his heart. That, and here he read through your files he felt proud of you. The kind of proud feeling those big brother felt when their little brother did something that is so awsome for him. Reading through your achievements, he couldn’t hold the big smile that creeping on his face.

“He has Stark in his blood after all…” He said to himself.

“Who has Stark blood in his ?” Pepper asked as she walked to his desk. She kissed him and then stand there beside him to wait for his answer.

“Would it be weird if I tell you that I have a brother ?” He asked her with one brow raised.

“What do you mean you have a brother ?” Tony then showed her your files and tell her everything happened in that night. She went silent for a long time.

“Come on say something!” Tony breaks the silence

“You want to meet him.” It’s not a question, but a statement because Pepper knows him like the back of her hand. “I’ll handle the meetings for this week but you owe me Tony” She walked to the door and before she exits Tony yelled “I Love you MIss Potts”

When you came home that day you could’ve swear your heart is going to jump out of your chest. There, sitting on your dinning table with your mom, chatting comfortably is Tony Stark. The one that you learned as your half brother just three days before. Dumbfounded, you couldn’t find any words and just walk to your chair in that table like a robot. Sitting in front of someone that you admire secretly felt bizarre.

“Close your mouth, you’ll catch a fly” He said then chuckled

You smiled at that, and looked to your mom, then to Tony again. Somehow it doesn’t feel awkward at all, it felt like it’s normal. All this time you ate with your mother in this very table and you always feel incomplete. You always thought that it’s supposed to be your father. But now seeing Tony here, you finally realized that it is not a father figure that is missing in your life. Your mother has always been one when it’s needed. It is a brother that you’ve been longing for this whole time. When you finally came to this realization, you responded “Welcome home brother…” This earns you all the eyes in the room, your Mom that is visibly crying before she’s now sobbing again. And Tony, he smiled so wide and you can see the tears also pooling at the corner of his eyes. You spend the lunch trying to catch up on each other’s life. Mostly it’s Tony that wanted to hear your stories, what you’ve been through to be this amazing person you are.

“You finished school earlier this year, what’s your plan ? Ever considered in joining Stark Industry?” Tony asked after they finished their lunch.

“Actually when I was in high school I thought about applying to your company..” At this revelation, Tony’s eyes light up, only to be replaced by shocked expression at what he said next “But then i have this i don’t know, desire ? to serve the country.”

“No way… You’re not ! You’re coming with me to my company” He sulk like a child.

“Well you’re to late for three days brother, I just got back from special force recruitment and I’m in the program”

“No Way you’re not even 18… how could they let you in?” He whined

“I don’t know and I don’t care, but that doesn’t mean that we can’t catch up for the lost time.”

“Fair enough… how about you show me around tomorrow ? I want to know everything about you, school, friends, anything, before you go to that special force of yours and make us go Dear John.” At this you just laugh and agreeing to his request.

When you were finally finished your military education, you were sent straight to a secret operation in Middle East. A lot of things happened in the span of four years, and the best thing to you, it’s Avengers. The fact that your brother is Iron Man was surprising to anyone, you included. But what surprising more is that Tony kept his promise not to out you as his brother to the world. At first he was planning to do so, that way you wouldn’t need too join the special force program in the first place. But you refused, you told him that serving your country is a calling for you, and you wanted to give everything you have to do it. And he caved in, somehow knowing each other in such a short amount of time made you both bond faster and stronger than you could imagined.

The day when New York attack happened was the same day when you were in your mission, so you had no idea what happened back in the States. And when you finally got a contact, it’s a months later from the secret base in Tel Aviv after you finished your mission. Given the break to come home, you couldn’t wait to surprise your brother and his team of super heroes. Well, it’s mainly just a reason so you can see the legendary Captain America in person.

Avengers Tower

If Tony isn’t a crazy rich genius billionaire, the recovery of his tower wouldn’t be this fast. It took exactly three months for his Tower could finally function like it used to be. The team were also gathered again after their vacation, minus Clint that nobody knows his whereabouts, and Thor that is in Asgard.

“Spangle you could just ask JARVIS to torn the TV on” Tony said from his seat at the corner of the common room.

“Yes… It still freaked me out to talk to someone I couldn’t see..” Steve scratched his head in embarrassment.

“Well, prepare yourself to be more surprised what Stark have in his Lab..” Natasha cut in with a mug of coffee in hand.

The banter between the ex-assasin and the spangled men were actually pretty amusing for Tony. If only his mind is there at the moment with him. But no, his mind went to all those years ago when he first met you and your mom. The day you spent together doesn’t feel like he’s trying to get to know someone. It felt just like two brothers that’ve been away from each other before they reunite. It’s funny because when he finally get to talk to you more, he saw himself in you. It’s obvious that you have Stark’s brain, even as he hate to admit it, you look way better than him. But the one that makes him grow even fonder of you was your sass. You could give him a taste of his own medicine. That’s why he loved you so much.

He’s been staring at his phone that displayed your picture, the one in your uniform right after your graduation ceremony. A week before you were sent to Middle East to lead backup team in Tel-Aviv Israel. He was sad because he didn’t get to say good bye in person to you. Knowing nothing about when will you come back because it’s classified. Well for other people it is, but nothing can stop him from making sure that he knows when will his little brother come back. He already have a party planned in his head to welcome you. He’s caught up in his head and didn’t hear that Nat have been calling him for a few times.

“Tony.. Tony! You okay ? We kinda lost you for a moment..”

“Yeah yeah…I’m fine just counting time till I could throw another party.”

“You just threw a party few months ago when this building was reopened.” Nat rised her eyebrows in amusement

“Well get used to it, in fact I could throw a party right now if I want…” He replied matter of factly.

Their interaction were cutted off by JARVIS “Sir, you have a visitor from U.S Army’s Special Force.” At this information both Nat and Steve turned at Tony with questioning look. Only to be welcomed with his shocked wide eyed expression.

“Where is he ?” His voice came out calm while his mind is going overdrive. There’s only two possibilities if someone from your commando wants to find him. It could be you, but he remembered you wanted to keep your Stark blood as a secret. Then there’s this possibility where it is one of your team mate that delivering him a very bad news that he never wanted to hear. But the fact that he knows your mission were supposed to be a year long, he couldn’t help his mind to go over the later possibility. He stand up a little bit shaky and unfocused, first time seeing Tony in this kind of state Nat and Steve decided just to follow him in silence.

The three of them reached the door of Tony’s office where JARVIS told them the visitor’s waiting. Nat and Steve could see Tony’s hand shaking as he reached for the handle and pushing the door open. As the door opened, they could see a men with his back to them. His posture was obviously a soldier’s one. Broad shoulder, fairly tall, taller than Tony but still a little bit shorter than Steve. And he wear a complete formal uniform from Army, Steve recognize it everywhere since it’s not that different from back in the days. He was about to ask who are you, but Tony breaks the silence.

“(Y/N) ? Is that you ?” Hearing Tony’s voice weavering only invite him to look at the billionaire. He never thought that he would ever witness the most miraculous thing in his live. There, Tony Stark that he know have a heart of steel, like literally, with tears streaming down his face. He was to struck to Tony’s expression to notice that by now Natasha’s face also turned into that comical slack jawed expression.

The men turned and they could’ve swore that for a flash second he looks exactly like Tony with taller frame. It was until you opened your mouth Steve and Nat completely lost their control of their face “Good to see you brother, I heard you saved the world….” Then he flashed the brightest smile they’ve ever seen.

Tony just dashed into the room and take you in bone crushing hug. Sobbing while mumbling incoherently. Again, Nat and Steve just to dumbfounded seeing Tony crying uncontrollably. It’s like seeing one of those chick flicks where the two sister has been separated for a long time then they met for the first time.

Tony pulled back still snifling “God, I thought they want to meet me to deliver your death news or something..”

You chuckled at him “I’m not that easy to get rid off, besides what makes you think that ? couldn’t you just, I don’t know figure out that it was me ?”

“Well, I did, at first. But then I remembered that you were assigned in twelve fucking months mission in Israel. So my mind drift to the worst possibility.” He confessed

“Wait…. How did you know I was assigned to Israel for twelve months?” You asked, and you could visibly saw him shifted awkwardly “God ! Tony, what I told you about hacking into my commando’s system? How if they found out?” You asked him in annoyed tone

“They wouldn’t, trust me.. but how ? Your mission plan were designed for twelve months?” He countered

“Well, because of someone like you that could possibly hack into our system, I changed the whole plan. They run a simulation then goes with mine, it’s way more efficient, and faster than what the commando made us so..” You shrugged

“You use that Stark brain of yours good.. Anyway have you eaten yet ? I have a chef from France that I hired for a week, you want a steak? Oh wait I’ll get you a steak, you love meat…” He rambled like a mother that saw their children after school.

You cleared your throat “You won’t introduce me to them?” You gestured to the pair that still has confused look on their face.

Tony looked back and drag you with him, at first you thought he was going to introduce you to your favorite heroes, but he dragged you past them, rambling that you need foods more than you need to be introduced to them. You screamed as you walked the hall “It’s honor to meet you Captain, and Black Widow you’re gorgeous I’m a fan..” Your shout were cut short when you turned the corner.

They were still trying to process what they just witnessed in silence untill Natasha speaks “So, Tony just cried..”

“He has a brother…” Steve continued

“Obviously younger one..”

“And he’s in an Army..”

“A Special force..”

“In such a young age…”

“And his rank is higher than yours..” At this, Steve whiped his head to look at Nat in shocked expresion. “What ? you didn’t see it ? He’s Colonel..” Natasha give him her Black Widow smirk

“Shit…” Steve cursed

“Language!..”

Taggs : @thegreatficmaster @supernaturalimagine @supernaturaldaily @waywardwinterfics @buckyywiththegoodhair @angryschnauzer @mrgrant9559-blog @kaylzjordan @rawritsmeh @supernaturalfanfiction-com @after-avenging-hours @winchesterenthusiast @themerlintrashcan @wayward-warriors @themorningtrashcan @izzywinchester @avasparks @eve05glee @thegabbybear @paladin-alby

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eighteleven87 · 3 years

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This time last week I was awoken by the thought of emailing Lauren and seeing if we could meet up and have one final conversation. I wanted “closure,” whatever that actually means. Later in the day I would have a few drinks and work up the courage to actually send her that email. For whatever reason, she agreed and set the date for Friday, June 18.

I maybe shouldn’t have gone through with it. The days prior to the meet-up, I was kept awake by the thought of what could happen, what might happen, what ought to happen. I had a gut feeling she was seeing or had seen other people between our break-up March 10 and that Friday. And, as she would later tell me in one of the last things she ever said to me... go with my gut. I have a gut feeling like nobody else she had ever met.

The night prior, I couldn’t sleep. Tossing, turning, over-caffeinated on Mountain Dew, I was a wreck. I woke up early and texted her, asking her what time she wanted to meet up. She said “6-ish.” I agreed, and bided my time until then. Thinking if it was still a thing I should be doing, which deep down I knew it was not, but it was too late to cancel.

In the back of my head, I knew it was over, but I held onto whatever hope I could that maybe, just maybe, there was a fraction of a chance we could see eye-to-eye, have a good, if final conversation, and hook up. Do what we did best, and at her place, no less, same as the first time we saw each other some two years and nine months ago. But, that was not meant to be.

The evening started successfully enough. We each were calm and collected. We both were apologetic and honest, open about where we did the other person wrong, and what we would have liked to have been different during our relationship when it still was a thing. She wished I was nicer to her and had seen her different from the get-go -- that I had viewed her as a girlfriend, as “the one,” and not another hook-up during my hot boy summer. I wished she wasn’t so nice, was less forgiving, more honest, and set firmer boundaries.

We kept talking over drinks. I moved my seating position every next drink I had, from a chair on the side of her, to her coffee table in front of her, to sharing her loveseat beside her. After our third drink each, things started to unravel. We had just started talking about the money I was set to give her, for she had let me stay with her while I wasn’t offering her much in return, but then she dropped a bomb on me.

Same as the first time we met way back in September 2018, I got close to her and wanted to touch her legs. I asked if she would be comfortable going from a knelt position on the loveseat to stretching her legs over mine. Different to 2018, she recoiled, pulling back and saying, “We aren’t going to sleep together tonight. I’m sorry, it just isn’t going to happen. ... Is that OK?” I backed off. I said that was fine. I apologized.

But then, out with it: “I have to be honest: I’ve been seeing someone.” My heart sank immediately, even though I knew internally that that was more than likely the case. Based on internal instinct, gut feeling, pattern recognition, and witnessing her behavior across the last two times we caught up with each other. There was something secretive about her, where she almost went out of her way not to mention it. A fear she had to her, where she felt if she told me, I would get so angry that I would jeopardize her current relationship, sabotaging it where it stood.

Perhaps her fears were justified. I had previously told her that I informed my previous girlfriend’s boyfriend, whom she started talking to, flirting with, and seeing while we still were together that she still had feelings for me. I sent him texts and photos that she’d sent me in private, as I never felt right about how she was handling things. So Lauren, playing off that, refused telling me about the new guy.

Thing is, this was a case of deja-vu. Lauren also started talking to and flirting with this new guy while we still were together. While we still were dating, spending more nights together than we took time apart, and while we still were sleeping together exclusively. She knew she liked this guy, she followed his Twitch stream, and only after he called her out, asking if she was flirting with him, did she acknowledge it. Then she waited two days and texted me a three-sentence message calling it off between us.

There was much to be desired about how all of this went down. Lauren admitted that she should have broke it off with me sometime in the summer of 2019, but didn’t. The sex muddied things. She didn’t want to be lonely. Into COVID, which she didn’t know how long it would last, she didn’t want to feel isolated. So she held onto me, even though the feeling of wanting me to be hers had long since left her. I was, essentially, a placeholder keeping her warm -- figuratively as well as literally -- until she happened upon somebody she liked and got on with better.

What kicked my heart into the gutter was I was doing my best to win her back. I have been working on my own self nonstop, doing everything from seeing a therapist, quitting drugs, improving my diet, going to the gym and exercising, reading self-help books to teach me how to treat women and how to subdue my angry tendencies... but she was already moved on. While I had been working so damn hard for a glimmer of a chance with her once more, where I would actively rebuild every bridge I had burned, she told me she had found “the one.” And it wasn’t me.

“You just know ‘the one’ when you meet them.”

The mood immediately changed. I didn’t want to be there any longer. Not only was I on her turf, I was on his. I felt played, I felt rejected, I felt betrayed, and I felt used. She kept going, too. “We didn’t have that much in common.” “We weren’t officially together, so it wasn’t actually cheating.” “I’m sorry, it just kind of happened. I didn’t plan this.” And many similar gut-punching claims, all of which I either refuted or absorbed rather calmly. I didn’t blow up at her. I didn’t swear or throw a fit. I took it.

She got up and got me a glass of water. She still cared for me enough not to want me to walk out of her place the final time, knowing I might have gotten into a car accident. And I woke up to a text saying, “Please just tell me you got home safe.” I said “Yes,” then deleted the conversation. And that was the last of it.

While it makes me feel good knowing she doesn’t absolutely despise me, and cares about me as a human being, insofar as not wanting me to get hurt driving home after drinking with her at her place, I can’t help but feel burned by her. To an absolute crisp. She knew it was over, for over a year, but kept me hanging onto the hope that something was left. She spent weeks watching a guy on Twitch she knew she had a crush on, and communicated with him as if she did, while I was trying to figure out a way to hold onto her.

We agreed we did each other wrong, we did each other dirty. We didn’t perhaps ever think that we were “the ones” for each other. And I admit there were other women I connected with better during the relationship and wrote private journals about, but I didn’t go out of my way to communicate with them. I didn’t flirt with them, message them, and most importantly, they never had any feelings for me. They never wanted me.

And yet, I still feel rotten how it played out. For how I viewed her from the jump, how I “could have done better” than her and not treating her the way I rightly should have. And, for her not to feel... anything, after two and a half years together, making me feel utterly used, like someone she kept around only because she liked our sex and my company, but not me.

I feel like if she had just said no to my wanting sex that night, as a “goodbye,” then things would have ended a lot more smoothly between us. Her telling me about how she started following a guy’s Twitch stream she found attractive, watching him, talking to him, having feelings for him, and flirting with him while we still were together -- at least, in my mind we were together -- didn’t sit right with me. It never, ever will.

I was more than on board with making things right between us and paying her back for the money she indebted herself to while we were together. But, she also admitted she was going to move back to her home state of North Carolina to be with this guy, and it made me feel like, man, you can’t even wait a little while between us? I meant this little to you, that you are doing this to me?

She said she ended it as soon as she realized she was flirting with him, and she said she didn’t plan on it working out. He asked her on a video game date or something and she declined, at least at first. She said she didn’t do anything wrong, and soon as she realized what was going on, she ended it. But I can’t get over it.

I can’t just give her money now, long after she ended it, and soon after she made the decision to move to be near him. I am not bankrolling her new life without me. Whether that makes me a bad, distrustful person to her or not, I just can’t do it. I am too hurt over it. She left me feeling like I could have been “the one” had I just cleaned up my act, then she tells me I was the one before “the one.”

I leave this feeling more angry and upset with myself than I do with her. She wasn’t the one for me, and if I am to be completely fucking honest, her finding somebody closer to her brother and parents as they age and she doesn’t want to be so far removed from them... it feels fitting. I don’t know how I would feel had I found someone so far away from my own family and couldn’t see them every week as I do now, as I am about to in a few short minutes here. Father’s Day without my father? No bimonthly meet-ups with my mom for lunch and cop dramas on TV? No bullshitting with Jamie?

I want to make this right with her still. I do, in earnest, feel as if I was the one who did more of the fucking-it-up part, though we each were abusive toward each other. We both used each other. We both hurt each other verbally, and in some cases physically. But I was the one who took from her, and I do want to offer her at least something to help her out. Maybe I will come to a point where I can accept that, but now is not the time.

I am so, so sorry Lauren.

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justanoutlawfic · 6 years

Text

Two Worlds Collide: Chapt. 1

Summary: When Mary Margaret discovers the girl that stole her credit card living in a stolen car, she decides to take her in as her foster daughter. Emma soon realizes that her foster mother has feelings for the cute sheriff and tries to play matchmaker. However, Mayor Black is determined to break up this little family once and for all.

Author’s Notes: This is a season 1 AU that is partially based off Brooke Davis' plotline from season 6 of One Tree Hill. There are a few changes to the backstory of the curse: Regina and Snow buried the hatchet in "The Evil Queen", so it was Fiona that ultimately cast the curse by killing Malcolm. Also, David and Kathryn are not married in this version of events, as I get squicked out by infidelity being made out to be romantic. So, in this, Snowing is just cursed to be apart. Other than that, everything else is the same outside when time starts moving again. Emma has been an orphan her life and ends up in Storybrooke at 15.

Trigger warning: This chapter briefly talks about trafficking but it's not going to be apart of the actual story.

Also on AO3

Mary Margaret took a sip of her hot chocolate, letting out a small sigh. She had just gotten through another failed meeting with her social worker. She had really thought that she was going to end up with a child that time. Instead, the mother had decided to go with another family…one with two parents.

It was hard, but not as hard as the first adoption that she could remember. She got a call about a baby girl in the middle of the night and rushed right over. When she got there, she held the baby and cuddled her close, all was great. Until the mother changed her mind. The baby was ripped out of Mary Margaret’s arms and she was left in the middle of the hallway, sobbing. Many of her friends wondered why she hadn’t given up right then and there. The truth was, she wanted to. Yet, the other part of her desperately wanted to be a mom.

So, there she was. A 28 year old single woman, unlucky in love, who just wanted a baby and that didn’t seem like it was ever going to happen. Everyone in town was downright miserable. From her best friend, Ruby, who had planned on leaving town the day she graduated high school but had to stay behind to tend to her grandmother who had a heart attack, to her other friend, Regina, who had adopted a baby boy named Henry but was currently going through a divorce from her husband. The only person who was happy, truly happy, was Fiona Black. She was the mayor of their town and controlled everyone. Even the notoriously scary landlord, Mr. Gold, seemed to do whatever she said.

Why couldn’t they all be happy? What was keeping them apart?

Just as she was lost in thought, she felt someone running past her and grab something. Mary Margaret shot up and watched as a young girl took something from her wallet before dropping it to the ground and running once again.

“Hey!” Mary Margaret yelled out after her. She tried to chase after the blonde whirl, but it was too late. She sighed and picked up her wallet, examining the contents. “Just great.” The thief had stolen her credit card, though strangely left the cash. Luckily, she had enough to pay for her tab and slammed it down.

Ruby walked over, tilting her head. “Did you get a good look at her?”

“No.” Mary Margaret sighed. “I guess I’ll just have to put a block on it. Don’t know why they wouldn’t just take the cash.”

“Cash runs out, you can charge more to a card, I guess.”

“You should call Sheriff Nolan, maybe he could track her down.”

“I don’t want her to get in trouble, she looked pretty young. I’ll call my company right away so she can’t do much damage.”

Mary Margaret walked out of the diner and headed home to her loft. The credit card company was closed for the night, so she couldn’t even put a block on her card yet. All she could hope for was that the little thief just needed to buy food or something to help her family out and wasn’t about to go on a shopping spree at Gold’s Pawnshop.

Emma made her way down the dark street, a tiny bag in her hand. The woman she had stolen the credit card from hadn’t called the company yet and the clerk who seemed around her age, could care less about the name on it as she purchased some necessities. She hadn’t eaten in days and knew better than to just stand around begging. That was what got her busted in Boston.

She reached the yellow bug she had parked out of sight from anyone and crawled into the backseat. She was too young for a driver’s license, but that hadn’t stopped an old foster brother from teaching her how. She had stolen the bug after she ran away from her last group home and shuddered at the thought. Emma had put up with a lot in her life. From physical abuse being neglected for days. So, when she met a potential couple that wanted to adopt a 15 year old, she was skeptical. A little more research showed that they had adopted 5 other girls, all teenagers. It made them commendable, kind hearted. Nobody wanted to adopt a teenager, let alone almost 6.

Then she realized why they had “opened up their hearts so much”. They were trafficking these girls and no one had any idea. She had been tipped off by one of them living there and warned to get out of there as fast as she could. When Emma reported it, her social worker accused her of lying and said that she was just looking for an excuse to not get adopted.

So…she ran. She ran as fast as she could, found the closest car and found a way to get a new VIN number. It wasn’t long after that, that she was on the road and driving for as far as the crappy little car would take her. She saw a sign for Storybrooke, Maine and the rest was history.

Emma knew she couldn’t stay long. The town wasn’t very big and certainly some people would catch onto her stealing. She just had to make it to Canada and she’d be home free.

Curling up in the back seat, she closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep. One of her old foster sisters had said that things would be better come morning. They never were and Emma had lost all hope of that happening…but, a small part of her wished that they really would.

#snowing #snowing au #mama snow #mama snow au #charming family #charming family au #daddy charming #daddy charming au #young emma swan #teenage emma swan #teen emma swan #two worlds collide verse

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godlyvan · 7 years

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02 | OPPORTUNISTIC

summary | friends with benefits ends because y/n can’t do this anymore, and van mccann laughs at her reason why.

warnings | swearing, a little smut, van mccann being a little shit.

a/n | i love hippo campus’ music quite a lot, so i thought i’d attempt a vanfic based on one of their lyrics from opportunistic. i hope you guys like this. enjoy.

lyric line(s) | I’d like you to savor the taste of me on your lips, I swear it's the last time you'll get it

The sounds from the speakers carried throughout the house, and throughout the hearts of its guests. Y/N walked in with a determination nobody could wither. She guided her new-found friend, Talia, through the crowd, weaving in and out of different crowds to reach the kitchen. There sat hundreds of red solo cups, some empty and some filled with an unrecognizable liquid, piled on top of the table in the kitchen. Y/N grabbed the bottle of vodka, the last bit of orange juice from the fridge, a bottle of grenadine syrup and two cups for her and Talia. “What’re you making?”

“Vodka Sunrise. It’s basically a Tequila Sunrise, but with vodka. It’s really good, I promise.” Y/N made the mixed drinks for the two of them, smiling as her friend took her first sip. “Good?”

“Very.” They spent most of their time in the kitchen, only removing themselves when there was a decent song on. They’d sway their hips to the beat, dancing with each other, not caring if anyone joined or not. Beads of sweat would accumulate at their foreheads, making the strands of their hair stick to their faces. Everyone was captivated by them, staring as their hips grinded into each others.

Talia was soon to be whisked away, leaving Y/N all alone in the kitchen, making mixed drinks for herself. That was all until he came in the room, demanding the attention to be turned towards him. He stole the room away from her, everyone’s eyes gliding up and down his body, looking over his all-black attire. “I assume you’re the designated bartender for tonight, then.”

“Can make you anything you want, darling. Just tell me what you need.”

“I’ll take anything you feel up to making.” Y/N smirked, fixing him up her specialty drink. She was truly an amazing bartender, always earning more tips than anyone else in the bar that she worked at. Janice, her boss, always made sure she’d work on Saturdays, reeling in the most money they get throughout the week.

“Here you are,” she smiled, handing him the cup. He wasn’t too sure about the drink. It looked well made, but he had never had it before. “It’s an old fashioned from where I used to live. Always made it at parties ‘cause everyone loved it.”

“It’s actually really good. Where did you learn to make this?” He asked, downing half his cup.

“Madison University in Wisconsin. Big on old fashioneds, especially the professors.. Never got your name. What is it?” She asked, her hand now resting on her hip. He smiled at her, taking a sip from his cup, licking his lips afterwards.

“Name’s Van. I was named after Morrison, y’know.”

“Oh really? Never woulda thought of that. Better not disgrace the name of Sir George Ivan, dude. I’d have to kill you.” Van raised an eyebrow at her, shrugging his shoulders.

“Wouldn’t dream of it, love. Now tell me, why’re you at this party by yourself? Surely you’ve got someone who’d be interested in your company.” She went from looking around the room, to looking into his eyes in a split second, trying to decode what he meant by it all.

“I came here with a friend, but she wanted to leave with some fuckboy. Don’t mind being lonely, but I don’t entirely mind the company.” She winked at him, walking away into the living room. The sounds coming from the speakers had changed from some sappy Rihanna song, to an uptempo beat with lots of drums. One could probably headbang to this, but instead, hips were swung from side to side, alluring some of the guests in the crowd, who weren’t dancing, to find themselves someone to dance with.

“I thought you’d want me to follow, was I entirely wrong?”

“You were not wrong at all, darling. If you don’t dance with me, though, I might have to find someone else to.” He jumped at the chance, his hands resting themselves on her hips, her fingers gliding between his. Together their hips rocked and collided, his hands gripping her hips hard, her hands above her head, feeling the music. Something in their movements made them realize they needed to move this somewhere else quickly, knowing it wouldn’t be long until the other was going to need something more than what they were doing. “Bedroom?”

“Yes, please.” He lead her upstairs, walking slowly down the stairs into the basement. It was renovated to be an in home movie theater. There were couches all along the walls, with the movie screen almost as big as the wall. They took one of the far away couches, Y/N’s hands pushing Van down to sit on the couch. She climbed onto his lap, her hands resting on his shoulders as she finally found her spot to sit. She wrapped her arms around his neck, her lips hovering above his teasingly. Her thumb brushed over his lips, smiling to herself before biting her lip.

“You’re driving me crazy, love.”

“That’s the point, darling.” She moved his head with her hand, her lips dipping down to touch his neck lightly. Y/N dragged her tongue down his neck and back up again, pressing a light kiss behind his ear. A low groan came from his mouth as he laid his head back on the back of the couch. She smirked to herself before she began to leave a trail of kisses from his neck to his lips, making him moan from anticipation. His hands found themselves back at her hips again, some of his fingers tucking under her belt loops. He guided her hips to grind against his, eliciting a moan from the both of them.

The kiss started off soft, small pecks and gentle, little bites on bottom lips, but soon transformed into a hard, passionate one. Hands gripped whatever they could, whether it’d be hair, clothing, hips or shoulders. Tongues rolled against each other, making their moans become louder somehow. They only broke apart for air and to tear at each other’s clothes. Soon, the two would be completely naked, aside from Van’s pants, which was a pain to remove.

The pair moaned and whimpered until they rode out their highs, hot, white light blinding the both of them. Hip movement from Y/N became erratic, as well as their breathing. As soon as they came down from their high, they put back on their clothing. “Maybe we could do this again sometime, I had a great time.”

“Me too, hand me your phone.” And he did as he was told. He watched as she punched in her phone number, making her contact name ‘fwb’.

“Why’d you put down FWB?”

“That way you don’t get attached to me. Can’t fall in love if you don’t know my name,” she kissed his cheek, a smile quickly falling on her face. “Call me when you need someone to take away your loneliness, Van. See you ‘round.”

And he did call whenever he was lonely and in town. They’d meet up wherever they could, finding their way back to a hotel or some weird, cheap motel closest to them. He’d ask her questions if they’d be cuddling afterwards, which was very rare for them. “Are you ever gonna tell me your name?”

“Dunno. Maybe if we stop whatever this is between us.”

“Why would we have to stop? Why can’t I know your name now?” He asked, playing with the ends of her hair. She moved away from him, pulling on her underwear and pants before answering him.

“Like I said before, keeps you from falling for me.”

“Can you at least stay the night tonight?” He pleaded with puppy dog eyes. She didn’t realize she’d fallen right into his trap, unfastening her pants before climbing back into bed with him.

“Only this one time, McCann. No cuddling, though.” Van nodded, a smile stuck on his face the size of the moon. Of course, when she would soon drift off to sleep, he’d wrap his arm around her waist, pulling her closer. What he didn’t know was that she was awake the whole time, deep down knowing how fucked she was.

She ended up staying the night on many other occasions. They’d either drink or smoke and then fuck their loneliness away before falling asleep under the white sheets of his hotel bed. He’d always ask why they’d never fucked in her bed, but she’d always dodge this question until it was too late. Until she was already in so deep she would have to dig herself a way out.

“Can we go back to yours? I wanna see what you’ve got hidden away in your room.”

“No, we can’t. We’ve gotta stop doing this, Van.”

“Doing what?” He asked, “Fucking? Why the hell do you wanna stop?”

“I can’t do this anymore.” She didn’t want to tell him that she’d fallen for him. He looked into her eyes, trying to read her motive before she had said anything. “I need to stop this so I can move on. Can’t have some twat following me from place to place all the damn time.”

“Don’t act like I’m the one who’s annoying. You’ve called me more times this month than I ever have. You’re the only one who wants this to end. I’m perfectly fine with fucking you. That’s what this is - just two people fucking. Unless… you’ve got some feelings for me.”

“I don’t,” but he sensed the shakiness in her voice, knowing she was lying right away. “I don’t have feelings for you, and I never will.”

“Tell that to the tears in your eyes, love. You like me, and you know it.”

“I don’t fucking like you!” She yelled, running her fingers through her hair, Van’s smile getting wider by the second.

“You do, and it’s fucking hilarious. You were the one who told me not to fall in love, and here you are, crushing on me like a schoolgirl.” He laughed, his hands falling from behind his head to clutch his stomach.

“You’re a fucking dick, McCann,” she chuckled out, pushing him down onto the bed. She slipped on her shoes, pulling her jacket over her shoulders. “This is the last time you’ll see me for a good while. I hope you remember what I taste like, if not. You know how to reach me.”

And that was it, she disappeared from Van’s life without ever telling him her name. They’d text each other updates, Van telling Y/N all about the cities his in. He’d always ask to call, but she’d deny him the pleasure of hearing her voice again. But he’d be surprised when in the next couple of nights, she’d call him.

“Hello?”

“You’re in London, right?”

“Yes, why?”

“I need a favor.” And that was that, Van McCann would drive forty minutes to pick her up from the airport. They’d stay silent in the car ride back to his hotel room. Her flight had been cancelled, leaving her with nowhere to go. She didn’t want to bother him, but she’d kept up with Catfish and the Bottlemen’s whereabouts and had found he was right where she was. “Thank you, by the way.”

“Only way you’re getting out of this car, love, is if you tell me your name.”

“I’ll give you the first initial, that’s my offer.” He pondered it for a minute, wondering if it was worth it. The idea of car sex had never looked good until now.

“Fine, but only cause I’m tired, and I could really use some sleep.”

“It’s Y/F/I.” He proceeded to ask her over and over if her name was this, that, and more. She’d deny every name, even though he’d say it over and over. But he kept on guessing, having Y/N follow him to his room. She’d put her stuff down on the couch that lay off to the side. He shook his head, making her put her stuff on the bottom of the closet floor. She chuckled to herself, before casually moving her bag. “You’re fucking annoying, you know that?”

“And you are stuck in a hotel room with me until you can schedule a new flight. What do you wanna do to kill time?” He asked, a smirk playing on his lips. He prayed she’d want to have sex again, his body aching for hers.

“I guess we could have fun like old times, but I’d have to tell you my name first, wouldn’t I?” She asked, biting her lip afterwards. He nodded, grabbing the tips of her fingers with his. She walked slowly towards him, regaining that spot on his lap that completely belonged to her. “It’s Y/N.”

“Good, now we can fall in love and have a shit ton of babies. In fact, babymaking starts now!”

#vanmccann #van mccann #van #mccann #godlyvanoriginals #godlyvansongfic #my fics #songfics

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ineffablecatblog · 6 years

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How Jonas’ death changed me in terms of my BPD/anxiety

I will never in my life forget that exact moment. June 5th, 2015. I sat in the sun on my aunt’s balcony, on a chair with my feet up on another chair, and wrote into my journal. It must’ve been around 20*C, it was close to 11am. There was a Latte on the ground with a tall spoon in it that I took a picture of for Instagram. I had a little bracelet around my left ankle. Then my phone rang and Jonas’ Dad’s name popped up. I took the call and he was crying, and I knew something was wrong. The first few words he said to me were “He had a car accident”, then he told me the rest. Jonas had battled cancer in his legs. I’d never even known that. His Dad said there was nothing they could’ve done about it except for prescribing him meds to give him time before they’d have to amputate them. Jonas had been out and about with friends, and lost control over the car because of the medication kicking in when he was on his 10min-ride back home.

My friend of around 15 years is gone. Nobody was gonna come see me at midnight anymore. Nobody was gonna take my anxiety calls anymore. It was selfish that I cried, but I did. I cried and called two friends, texted someone. I was devastated. My Dad came into my room and I told him, and cried some more, and he cried with me.

My life has never been the same ever since. I started wearing a necklace with a J-pendant. I was a zombie who barely slept and had nightmares for a couple of weeks. The fifth of every month gave me breakdowns and dragged me down into the deepest holes my depression could have taken me to. I started slacking in school even more than I already did because I couldn’t focus anymore. I dropped out right before finals.

I was already in therapy because of my BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder) at the time, but every bit of progress that I had made up to then suddenly seemed lost. I broke down crying every time, my anxiety got worse, I couldn’t deal with myself anymore. All control was gone. The nightmares never stopped, I actually still have them today.

Ever since then, I’m scared that I’m not doing enough. That I don’t ask my friends “How are you”, “Are you okay?” enough, that I don’t tell them “I love you” often enough, that I’m missing that they’re struggling because I don’t make enough time for them, that I’m too busy with myself to notice when they need to talk. That fuels right into my mental health problems, especially my anxiety and BPD.

For those of you who don’t know what Borderline is, I’ll list a couple of the symptoms that are relevant in relation to losing Jonas. - unstable interpersonal relationships - impulsivity/emotional instability - making effort to avoid abandonment - disturbed sense of identitiy - chronic feeling of being empty

(Before I continue, I just wanna take a second to put a DISCLAIMER here: I realize that grief is a terrible feeling, which I obviously know first-hand. I was grieving for the longest time, but just because you lose yourself in grief for a while that doesn’t mean you automatically have chronic mental health issues. If you feel like something might not be “normal” to you, you can consult your Doctor and find out what it is, but don’t tell yourself things based on self-diagnoses or stupid tests and quizzes you can take online. The internet really can be your worst enemy when it comes to mental health.)

All of these really came down onto me like thunder and lightning, all at once. On one hand, I don’t really care about most people anymore. It takes a lot of time and effort to grow close to me, to mean something to me. It sounds unbelievably cold, but with an exception of barely a handful of people, if any of my friends were to tell me “I don’t wanna talk to you anymore” out of nowhere, I’d tell them “okay, bye”, because I expect people to not stick around the second I meet them, and I also don’t have time to play around anymore. I don’t ask questions anymore. I don’t “waste” my time anymore. I can’t fight for everyone anymore, and I won’t either. I turn 20 this year, and I have my priorities set. If you don’t meet me with the same respect that I meet you with, stay away from me. Don’t get me wrong, I love making new friends. I’ll welcome people into my life very quickly, but I am even quicker to cut them off.

The other side of that is how I handle things once I get attached to someone. Once a person really means something to me, I will frantically try and make sure we’re okay. It’s hard for me to not be insecure when someone’s natural behaviour is different from what I know as “normal”. I thrive off of attention and reassurance, so if I talk to someone I love, like my best friend, for hours every day, and then one day they don’t call or text, I am already in panic mode. I’ll endure it for a day or two, but I usually freak out after 48h and text them to see if we’re good, even if it’s in a joking manner like “ARE YOU ALIVE???? lol”. I know it comes across as super clingy and very annoying, I just recently had a long talk about that, with someone who means the world to me, and that just kinda drives me in circles. I’m really scared to be rejected, but that anxiety is exactly what makes people get tired of it, and then it begins again. This has ruined my previous relationship, which is why I decided to start therapy after it ended.

The only exception to that behaviour is my best friend of almost 6 years, Mo. We’re both busy as hell and we live somewhat far apart, so we don’t get to see each other a lot, but I know every time we do get together, nothing has changed at all. We still get lit and have a smoke on my parent’s rooftop patio together every time, that’s just a different type of connection and my fullest and purest form of trust and acceptance, I guess, and it took us six years and a lot of fucked up shit to get there.

The second I lost Jonas, I had no idea who I was anymore. I was all over the place, I hated my hair more than every before, no matter what I did with it. I didn’t like any of my clothes on me. I lost myself more frequently, meaning I mentally disappeared for a couple of minutes and just wasn’t there anymore, I watched myself from another perspective. I didn’t really know if things were real or not, I questioned everything, including just my sheer existence. Life was meaningless, there was no point to anything, so what even was life at all?

When one of your closest friends is suddenly gone, despite what people tell you, it will never completely stop hurting you. It’s been almost three years now and the fifth of every month still hurts me. June 5th still makes me cry, so does his birthday a month later. But I’m capable of handling it. I don’t skip school/work because of it anymore. I can eat that day. I can talk to people, and I can laugh. That’s progress, because for a long time, I couldn’t do any of that. I got better when I realized our connection wasn’t gone. I still write letters to Jonas, some of them online, most of them on paper. I still feel like someone is taking care of me when I go places. I know he’s somewhere out there. A good soul like that doesn’t die in a teenager’s body, a soul like that explores the forests and mountains of the world. The moment I understood what was going on, that I wasn’t alone, that my own physical company can be enough, was also the moment I started healing. I feel like I had so much structure going into this, and just kinda lost it when I started typing. This post really tired me out, so excuse me, if to you I seem to be pointlessly rambling about my struggles and how selfish I am. Sometimes I just need to write everything down, not only to share with those who care, but also to look back at it for myself. This is how I personally grow and reflect. You don’t have to see a point in this post, but if you do, I’m glad you’ve taken the time to read all of this, and if you need to vent, feel very warmly welcomed to shoot me a message on here or on the Gram. All the love,

Cat. x

#6 #jonas #death #trigger warning #death of a loved one #bpd #borderline personality disorder #anxiety #body horror

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stevedonnellyfaith-blog · 5 years

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The Case of the Missing Spoons (Post 107) 9-23-15

Our move into 1175 Delaware Trail continues to be a work in progress. Natalie is well along in her efforts to reassemble her Barbie megalopolis in the upstairs flat that is now her own, while the rest of us are lagging behind slightly. About two thirds of the boxes are emptied; a large number of plastic totes have also been triaged and transported directly into basement storage. The garage still looks pretty full but about half of the cardboard inventory is dedicated to Abby’s stuff for which I have no authorization to open, look at or breath on, an order that suits my laziness, but will become problematic as we are probably within a six week range of some snowfall.

I have progressed through the boxes clearly marked for kitchen, bedroom and bathroom contents and am now wedeling through cartons with seven and eight line-item markings for a goulash of miscellanea, none of which will be immediately useful. I intend to open them all in succession until I discover what has happened to the kitchen serving spoons. The empty spot in my kitchen silverware holder is quite vexing.

It is not like this is the first time I have lost something; my academy ring went missing on one of our house moves about a decade or so ago and I have come to terms with that gaping hole in my life. I actually probably have only worn the door knocker-sized piece of jewelry about twenty times since I purchased it in 1987 as it was a big bulky chunk of gold that was really only useful for thwacking Stephen and Abby on the head when they were younger and I knew less about the dangers of post-concussion syndrome.

I would have liked to have found all the spices and dry goods also neatly packed among the kitchen sundries, but I seriously suspect that Nick chucked all of that stuff even though there is no real expiration date on paprika and pumpkin spice. When I began my drive towards the Nevada line with Stephen riding a sleepy shot-gun, I was pretty sure that I would never see my favored shaker bottles of rosemary and thyme ever again, so if I end up coming across some McCormick products or one of Pam’s missing cookie sheets as I rifle more boxes, it will be an unexpected pleasure. I mostly just want to find the serving spoons, though.

For the time being the hunt for the spoons is paramount in my very simple existence. On a happy note I did notice that for one incredible 48 hour period the wood block holder by the sink did possess all six steak knives. One went missing within two weeks of my having bought the set two years ago. When I was doing the dishes last night, I did discover that the rack was down to five again with none in the sink or dishwasher. It would be interesting to know exactly whether the long lost sheep had strayed again or whether a new brother or sister knife now had gone on vacation to one of the kid’s rooms or into a hidey hole populated by Lilliputians or Borrowers. At least I know the knife made it to Ohio; about the serving spoons I am not so sure.

That is how life at home has been. We don’t have the internet or television yet although my email in box is deluged with special offer solicitations from all sorts or media companies and home security services. If Dish TV accepted double-coupons, they would potentially owe me a monthly stipend for at least a little while. My electronic deficit is a deep chasm. On Sunday, for instance, I must have dropped into one of those time slidey hole thingees and slid back a couple of decades. I actually listened to an unlikely Browns win on the radio Sunday, while I hedged on observing Sabbath rest by folding laundry. I live in the world, but my current corner is bereft of the loud klaxon of cable news, reality television and whatever is popular on HBO this season. I even usually commute to and from work in thankful silence, because Natalie demands a saccharine pop repertoire as accompaniment whenever we drive together.

Today, though, I turned on EWTN radio as my little Aveo scooted up the last ten miles of Route 14 into Streetsboro. I actually expected to hear the voice of Al Kresta, but it was Barbara McWiggin’s show instead. I usually flick the radio back off when I hear her voice, because she is always pleasantly happier than I usually find tolerable – not an indictment of her but more of an indicator that my soul is far from ready for eternal bliss. I expect that the majority of angels and saints that I will encounter, if I make it to heaven, will not have somber or sardonic dispositions. Anyway I decided to listen to Barbara’s show because the alternative was silence or the pop channels that Natalie has programmed into all my buttons but one. I had already completed a Divine Mercy Chaplet on my Mike Wiley rosary beads and was thoroughly sick of mentally chomping through my workday like it was a cow’s cud. Bubbly earnest people seemed to be the best of the choices.

She is a good woman despite her cheery disposition and her show was about the undercover tapes at Planned Parenthood, a subject that I have mostly ignored. I made up my mind about that organization long ago and recheck the facts only occasionally to confirm that PP is a totally corrupt and highly sinister outfit that continues to bamboozle nearly half of voting-age Americans. “We do mostly mammograms,” is the transparent fabrication that they offer to a bovinely credulous crowd who have never heard of Abby Johnson or care to understand her story. Their deceitful spin is routinely accepted because to question the veracity of our nation’s largest abortion provider is to open a horrifying Pandora’s Box of cynicism and evil that most certainly doesn’t provide carefully matched selections of modern music.

Ugly truth is a challenge for my generation. Growing up, none of us liked looking at the black and white images of heaps of emaciated bodies from the Holocaust. We still learned unrevisionist history then, but nobody liked facing that type of reality. We all saw the disturbing pictures in school; the ugliness was before our eyes. Today, facing the cruelty and sheer evil of a century of attempted secular eugenic extermination of whole portions of humankind is no longer common to our culture. Whether the perpetrators of the grandiose atrocities were named Hitler, the Imperial Japanese forces, Stalin, Mao, Castro, Pot, Manson, Milosevic or Muyagishari, we generally avert our eyes and replace the image with a Kardashian exploit. The twentieth century was a bloody time and it takes an act of will to watch Schindler’s List, The Killing Fields or Hotel Rawanda. The abortion mills of today are the historical progeny of the slave markets of the 18 hundreds and the death camps of the last century.

Once I get the internet again, I have resolved to review the PP tapes. Barbara convinced me that there is more to them than I originally expected. The truth will probably turn my stomach, but it is an unpleasantness that I believe that I am obligated to investigate because I can’t abide bullies and am committed to confronting evil wherever I find it. As a Catholic, I condemn no one, not Che, not Bin Laden nor even Judas. Jesus’ sacrifice for their salvation is infinitely more than sufficient to wipe away even their heinous sins if they only ask for His mercy. Neither do I condemn the deluded men and women who lie about abortion and facilitate the continued victimization of young women and their babies, but that does not mean that I accept the evil that is being done. I encourage all of you to watch the videos even if you are already Pro-Life. Evil is not rejected and refuted based on rhetoric and hearsay. Evidence is available.

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ferryboatpeak · 7 years

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@mildlymaddy, what better way to celebrate your birthday than to write something in a genre that you love and I loathe with all my heart? Here you go, a fluffy lilo KIDFIC (??!?!) with tomlinshaw pining, canon-compliant hoodie sharing, and just a spot of lourry angst…

Almost two months, and Louis still hasn’t met the baby. He hasn’t meant to put it off. It’s just that there are so many other things to do, and he and Liam are barely on the same continent these days anyway.

Today’s the day he decided that’s unacceptable. So he’s driving to Surrey, even after a full day shooting in Doncaster, even though he knows it’s a bad night for it. Liam’s probably knackered after getting back from the states on an overnight flight. And part of Louis knows that even without the jetlag, Liam would rather have a quiet evening with his little family.

But their friendship has always been based on Louis pushing boundaries and Liam ending up glad that he did, so Louis hadn’t bothered to ask how Liam felt about him showing up. He’d just announced he was coming, and he doesn’t feel one bit bad about it.

Nor does he feel bad about showing up the night before Liam goes on the Breakfast Show. You can stay up all night and still do the Breakfast Show just fine. God knows Nick and Harry have proved that.

Louis never got the chance to. Nick was the place Harry went that wasn’t Louis, the next chapter after the inexplicable fuel source that kept the too-bright too-hot flame of their friendship burning finally ran out. Being friendly with Nick would have felt like chasing after Harry with a knife and flint, trying to coax a spark onto something dead.

It’s after dark by the time he pulls up to Liam’s house. Cheryl answers the door, in yoga pants and a ponytail. “You look lovely,” Louis tells her, and means it.

“Thank you, love, it almost sounds like the truth when you say it,” she says, pulling him into a hug. “Come on inside, the baby’s sleeping on top of Liam.”

Cheryl turns to lead him into the living room. From behind, Louis can see a ghostly spot of baby sick on the back of her shirt. “He a good sleeper, then?”

“Both of them, yeah.” Cheryl smiles back at him.

Liam’s stretched out on the couch with Bear on his chest, tucked up in a ball with Liam’s arm holding him in place. There’s a load of unfolded laundry on the other couch, all baby blankets and onesies and tiny flannels.

Louis pushes aside several rattles and squeaky toys and sits on the coffee table next to them. “Hey,” he says, reaching one finger out to smooth over the fuzz on the back of the baby’s head. “Welcome aboard, little man.”

Liam beams, eyes tired but as happy as Louis has ever seen him. “He’s great, right?”

“Of course he is.” Louis touches the bottom of one tiny foot. “Congratulations.”

“You want him?” Liam gestures with his free hand, offering the baby to Louis.

“You sure? Never wake a sleeping baby.”

“He’s due to eat soon anyway,” Liam says. “Here, take him.”

Louis stands and scoops up Bear, who barely stirs when Louis situates him against his shoulder. He falls into the rhythm of holding a baby without even thinking about it, shifting his weight from side to side.

Bear’s practically weightless in his arms. He realizes, suddenly, how big Freddie’s gotten. Louis tips his head down to inhale the warm scent of baby shampoo and sour milk, and looks up to see that Liam’s got his phone out taking their picture.

Bear sleeps long enough for Louis to ask Liam all of the standard baby questions, how he’s sleeping and how he’s eating and what happened the night he was born. Then he wakes up and is willing to let Louis jolly him along for a few more minutes while he and Liam have a choppy half-conversation about video shoots and promo schedules.

“Breakfast Show tomorrow, then?” Louis finally asks. Bear squirms in his arms.

It’s not a question about Nick, not really. Louis makes it a policy not to ask about Nick, or even to notice him.

Liam nods. “Yeah, it’ll be good to see Grim.”

Louis hums noncommittally. Bear squawks and pushes away from his shoulder.

Louis mostly manages not to notice Nick’s long legs and big hands. It’s harder not to notice how Nick always seems so delighted with everything, tells every story like it’s the funniest thing that’s ever happened to him.

“I’ll tell him you said hi,” Liam says.

“…sure,” Louis says, after a moment, as Bear’s disgruntlement crescendos.

Sometimes Louis wonders if he could manage to annoy Nick enough to get underneath that exterior of gentle banter and amused self-deprecation, or if Nick would be just as delighted by Louis as he is about everything else. He doesn’t think too hard about which outcome he’d prefer.

Bear arrives at full-on tears, and Louis recognizes that professional intervention is called for. “Cheryl!” he yells, just as she swoops into the room.

She retrieves the baby from him, automatically falling into the same baby-bouncing sway Louis had. It’s much more effective when Cheryl does it. “Bedtime,” she says, smiling at Liam as she heads toward the stairs.

Liam watches her go. It’s obvious he’d like to follow. “Want to see the nursery?” he asks Louis, hopefully.

“Sure,” Louis says, although he doesn’t particularly care about the nursery. But he’s got a half-idea in his head, and being upstairs could help.

Cheryl’s in the middle of undressing the baby when they get to the nursery. Liam joins her at the changing table, chattering sweetly to Bear and letting him grab his fingers while Cheryl efficiently deals with his nappy.

“Pass me the cream?” she asks. Liam hands her a tube of something from his side of the baby. One finger’s still in Bear’s clutches, and Liam doesn’t miss a beat in the one-sided conversation he’s conducting.

Louis knows the contours of this routine, although it’s strange to see it done as a team. Feeding and songs in the half-light of the nursery come next. He’d only be intruding if he stuck around.

This visit’s just about run its course, anyway. Nobody wants company for hours with a new baby, Louis remembers. You want company just long enough to adore the baby properly and to reassure you that people remember who you are outside your small cheerful prison of nappies and play mats and laundry.

“I’m off,” he announces, coming up behind Liam to hug him with one cheek pressed against his shoulder. “Thanks for letting me stop by. You’ve bred well.”

“Thanks for coming,” Liam says, turning around to hug him back. “You’re the first to meet him, of the boys, I mean.”

That feels wrong, but also right. “New favorite nephew,” Louis says into Liam’s shoulder. Liam feels skinnier.

Liam laughs. “I wish I could tell you you’re his favorite uncle, but I think Andy’s already got that one.”

“Think I’ll live,” Louis says as he turns to leave. “Good luck tomorrow,” he adds offhandedly, pulling the nursery door closed behind him.

He passes the half-opened double doors to the master bedroom on his way to the stairs. There’s a bassinet by the side of the unmade bed and an overlarge suitcase on the floor, clothes spilling out of it.

The half-idea in Louis’s head suddenly takes perfect form.

He slips through the opening in the door and paws over the contents of the suitcase until something catches his eye. A black hoodie with patches on it and blocky letters on the sleeve. One shoulder is that peachy-pink color that Liam’s been wearing lately. Louis likes it; it makes Liam look soft. Not like Harry’s aggressive pink.

He tugs the hoodie over his head and goes to preen in the mirror on the far side of the room. Perfect.

On his way back out the door, he skirts the edge of a baby blanket spread out on the carpet. Something gives under his foot, and Louis recognizes the gentle squeak of Sophie the Giraffe. He looks down to confirm. Sophie’s tangled up with… a pair of little crocheted nunchucks? Louis considers nicking them too; Freddie would love nunchucks.

He rejects the idea. Appropriating one of Liam’s innumerable hoodies seems like the kind of mildly monstrous behavior that will delight Liam (and, maybe, Nick). Stealing the coolest baby toy ever might be unforgivable.

The door to the nursery’s still closed when Louis trots downstairs and out the front door, hands tucked in the cuffs of the ill-begotten hoodie, smirking all the way back to Doncaster.

By the time he gets home, Liam’s due to wake up in an hour or two. Louis finds a well-lit corner and takes a selfie, eyes bugged out and lips stretched in flat-line smile, pointing at the pink patch on the shoulder of the hoodie. He sends it to Liam.

It’s the kind of story Liam might tell Nick, when Nick asks him about the others. If Nick asks him about the others.

Nick’s always making guests call people.

Louis keeps his phone on, just in case.

#it's the only kidfic i'll ever write #so i went for broke #it woulda been better with your beta #lilo #tomlinshaw #lourry #kinda #kidfic #paynopup #definitely not the brits verse #sorry not much happens #hbd #fic

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