musicalmetaphors47

[musicalmetaphors47]

#poetry #writerscommunity #mentalheathawareness #pain and suffering #poets on tumblr #books & libraries #bookstagram #booktok #trauma #pain #mentally exhausted #mental illness

[musicalmetaphors47]

#poetry #writerscommunity #mentalheathawareness #pain and suffering #poets on tumblr #writers and poets #writers on tumblr #darkness #panic attack #ptsdawareness #tw s3lf harm #tw self h4rm #tw sh related

[musicalmetaphors47]

I can’t hate you,

Even though I want to.

I can’t wish I never met you,

Even though I want to.

Perhaps our darkness intertwining

Was always destined to be our downfall.

Somewhere in the space between the rise and fall,

There was a moment when we were happy.

I felt loved.

I loved you.

Fuck, I still do.

But it doesn’t matter,

Because when trust is broken the roots die,

And the rest of the vine withers away.

I look at the ashes at our feet

That span the all-too-wide gap between us,

Tears streaming down my face as I realize there is no turning back.

If I let your acid keep watering me I will die,

So I have to let you go.

I walk away,

Never to return.

But a deep, raw love is never forgotten,

It is only etched deeper into the wounds of my soul.

-Julie Mae

#poetry #writerscommunity #mentalheathawareness #pain and suffering #poets on tumblr #writers and poets #writers on tumblr #darkness #panic attack #ptsdawareness #bpd #heartbreak #loss

[musicalmetaphors47]

Be hopeless,

I tell myself.

It’s better this way.

Be hopeless,

I tell myself.

Then I can’t let more pain in.

Be hopeless,

I tell myself.

It’s the only way to stay safe.

Be hopeless,

I tell myself.

But then I just stay stuck

In this agonizing state

Forever.

-Julie Mae

#hopeless #pain #safety #depressed #anxious #ptsd #trauma #poetry #writerscommunity #depressing post #mentalheathawareness #pain and suffering #poets on tumblr #writers and poets #writers on tumblr #darkness #panic attack #ptsdawareness #metaphor #women writers #anxiety #alone #depression #writer #chronic illness

[musicalmetaphors47]

A girl…

Alone

In a magical world.

But it’s not the kind with fairies and elves,

Butterflies and unicorns,

And flowers that fill the air with peace and hope.

No, it is the darkest of magic

Filled with the utmost despair and desolation

With no way out.

The only escape is unavoidable death.

-Julie Mae

#poetry #writerscommunity #depressing post #mentalheathawareness #pain and suffering #poets on tumblr #writers and poets #writers on tumblr #darkness #panic attack #ptsdawareness #metaphor #anxious #women writers #anxiety #alone #depression #writer #ptsd #magic #butterfly #unicorn #flowers #despair #death

[musicalmetaphors47]

I am only a dot.

A speck.

Barely a moment in time.

My pain means nothing.

My suffering means nothing.

If my life inconveniences another,

Then I am no longer of any consequence.

Far be it from me to have feelings

Or to be hurt by another.

I should just waste away

And disappear into the shadows,

Gone forever

-Julie Mae

#poetry #writerscommunity #depressing post #mentalheathawareness #pain and suffering #poets on tumblr #writers and poets #writers on tumblr #darkness #panic attack #ptsdawareness #metaphor #anxious #women writers #anxiety #alone #depression #writer #ptsd #chronic illness

[musicalmetaphors47]

I was never allowed to be myself at home,

I had to be what everyone wanted me to be.

I was responsible for everyone else’s

Emotions, moods, and especially their anger.

If I didn’t fix something

It became an even bigger problem,

So I preferred to keep the pressure cooker from exploding

Now I live alone,

And I am learning what it means to be me.

The first thing I have learned is how much I love being an introvert.

Independent, but

Needy for love.

Tactful, but still

Rash at times.

Outsider, but

Very thoughtful of others.

Emotional, but with

Radiant

Tears.

This is my version of being an introvert right now.

But it might change tomorrow

Because I’m still figuring it out.

-Julie Mae

#introvert #alone #solitude #home #apartment #depressed #anxiety #ptsd #bpd #anger #guilt #childhood #writer #poetry #writers community #poetry community #writers of tumblr #poets of tumblr #write your story #poetry lovers #poetic #acronym

[musicalmetaphors47]

It is better this way…

Alone

And isolated,

With no one to see my suffering.

I can disappear without hurting anyone,

And be gone before anyone notices.

I am sorry for the pain I emit to everyone around me,

But it is because I am in more pain than you can even imagine.

Please believe me that I wish things could be different,

But they cannot

And they never will be.

-Julie Mae

#alone #gone #done #depresśd #depreßsion #depressed thoughts #depressedquotes #mental illness #mental breakdown #isolation #isolated #sad #lonely #writer #writers #poetry #poet #poetry lovers #poetry🥀 #writerscommunity #poetry community #depressing post #mentalheathawareness #pain and suffering #poets on tumblr #writers and poets #writers on tumblr #darkness #panic attack #ptsdawareness

[musicalmetaphors47]

The sun rises over the horizon; another day has begun.

The familiar hum of our everyday lives

Threatens to drown out anything that might glimmer with importance.

People rush by during their commute to work

Barely glancing to their right or left,

Their vision much like a subway tunnel.

Anything not in front of them

Falls into the blurred vision of the periphery.

Like me.

I am in the periphery.

I am never in the crowd rushing forward.

I fall to the side, into that blurry unknown.

I’ve never been a part of the masses,

One who knows what to do or where to go or who to be.

I’ve never even known how to pretend I was one of the many.

No, I have always been an outsider.

A blurred line among many blurred lines,

To the point where we are all fog and blurred lines no more.

-Julie Mae

#fog #periphery #blur #gone #subway #poetry #writer #depressed #depressedquotes #anxiety #social anxiety #darkness #outsider #outside #poets of tumblr #writers of tumblr #writerscommunity #depressing post #mentalheathawareness #pain and suffering #poets on tumblr #writers and poets #writers on tumblr #panic attack #ptsdawareness #metaphor #anxious #women writers #depression #alone

[musicalmetaphors47]

I think people underestimate the darkness my brain can go to,

The level to which I can sink into the black nothingness of depression.

And then they think I can just snap out of it like it’s easy to leave.

The pit of depression is like quicksand.

The more I struggle to get out,

The deeper I sink into it.

People stand around the edges and laugh,

Pointing with shameful fingers at the girl who can’t get out.

In their eyes they only see a swimming hole with some questionably dark water,

But I can feel the quicksand underneath pulling me under.

It doesn’t matter how hard I try,

I cannot get out.

Drowning feels kind of nice at this point,

And as I sink into the deep, deep darkness

My inability to breathe underwater suddenly doesn’t seem so bad.

I’d rather sink into oblivion and never return.

-Julie Mae

#darkness #quicksand #drowning #done #depression #anxiety #mental health #ptsd #trauma #si #writer #sh #poet #writers of tumblr #poets of tumblr #writers community #poetry community

[musicalmetaphors47]

Darkness,

Feelings,

And emotions

I type out the hashtags I think someone else might relate to,

Ignoring the fact that I fucking hate myself.

I only genuinely care about the fact that other people feel loved,

But not about myself.

I could care less about myself

And my life.

I just want it to be over.

-Julie Mae

#lonely #give up #depressed #anxious #isolated #si #gone #trauma #ptsd #done

[musicalmetaphors47]

Floating is better than drowning.

Some would say that, at least.

But floating means getting pummeled by the waves

Till it feels like I am drowning.

It might look like I am on top,

But I reality I feel every wave crash on me

Till water fills my lungs,

And I can no longer breathe.

-Julie Mae

#floating #drowning #surviving #dying #waves #crash #depression #anxiety #trauma #ptsd #writer #poetry #depressedquotes #sad poetry #writerscommunity #depressing post #mentalheathawareness #pain and suffering #poets on tumblr #writers and poets #writers on tumblr #darkness #panic attack #ptsdawareness #metaphor #anxious

[musicalmetaphors47]

Replace the pain with polka dots.

Blood dripping down the walls

Forms streams of pain.

Where there once was life,

There is now death.

Where there once was hope,

There is now desolation.

Where there once was peace,

There is now violent misery.

We try to cover it up with flowers,

A casket,

And polka dot dresses in black to drown out the pain.

The truth is when death comes nothing makes it better;

No wake can replace someone’s life.

Pain can’t be turned into polka dots,

It can only be turned into bloody tears of agony.

-Julie Mae

#dead #bury #death #grief #depression #depressing post #grieving #depressing poem #writerscommunity #poetry #mentalheathawareness #pain and suffering #poets on tumblr #writers and poets #writers on tumblr #darkness #panic attack #ptsdawareness #anxious #women writers #anxiety #alone

[musicalmetaphors47]

A tall, strong tree bends in the wind of a mighty storm.

Dark clouds roll in till the tallest branches are obscured by thick black clouds.

Each time it bends till it almost snaps

The wind gives it just the slightest reprieve so it can straighten up before the next blow.

Branches snap off, and its sap bleeds out like a river crying out for help.

Rain pours down the open wounds where branches were torn off.

Like acid on an open wound it tears away at the gaping holes,

Making the wounds deeper and deeper with each passing hour.

Just as the tree feels it can take no more—

Like one more gust of wind and it will just snap—

A huge overwhelming swirling wind whooshes upon it

Bending it to its limits.

More branches and leaves fall to the ground

Like tear drops falling in ever increasing magnitude to the ground.

No one sees.

No one understands.

It is just its job to withstand the pressure.

Everyone passes by in their day,

Each consumed with weathering their own storm,

Not thinking of the fact that if they just banded together it would be easier to withstand the storm.

But alas, as each man is more afraid of falling than of being alone.

They each fail to look at their neighbor.

They would do good to look at the trees.

Just as our friend the tree is about to snap

His neighbor leans his way via the storm winds,

Holding him up when he cannot stand on his own,

And together they weather the dark, terrifying storm.

#depression #anxiety #writer #writing #poetry #original poetry #female poets #female writers #ptsdawareness #depressing post #writerscommunity #writers and poets #mentalheathawareness #pain and suffering #poets on tumblr #writers on tumblr #darkness #anxious #alone #trees and forests #storm

[musicalmetaphors47]

TW: sh

All the pain and trauma boil just underneath my skin.

It’s just far enough beneath the surface

That no one else can see it,

But I sure as hell can feel it

Like a fire raging in my veins

And a pressure-cooker about to explode.

I writhe against the incoming torment.

I finally cave and slice open my skin

To let some of the pain out.

But to no avail,

My breathing speeds up,

And I am left clutching my chest and gasping for air.

So I cut again

And again

And again.

Moving further and further up my arm,

Desperately slicing deeper and deeper to find some relief.

But as soon as I remove the blade I am right back where I started…

Panicking,

Alone,

And in endless amounts of agony.

(If you are struggling with sh please reach out for help you are not alone)

#trigger warning #self h@rm #tw sh vent #depression #anxiety #depressing post #mentalheathawareness #pain and suffering #poets on tumblr #writers on tumblr #darkness #panic attack #ptsdawareness #women writers

[musicalmetaphors47]

🖤

#writerscommunity #poetry #writers and poets #depressing post #mentalheathawareness #pain and suffering #poets on tumblr #writers on tumblr #darkness #metaphor #panic attack #ptsdawareness #anxious #women writers #alone #anxiety #depression

[musicalmetaphors47]

blurred lines 🫥

#sidewalk #cracks #blurred lines #dark #blind #lost #alone #flash #depression #anxiety #ptsd #panic #poetry #writer #writerscommunity #writers and poets #depressing post #mentalheathawareness #pain and suffering #poets on tumblr #writers on tumblr