#tomorrow will be better and it's hard to sob when

[eddiemunsons80sbaby]

Hard Habit to Break

Chapter 2

Pairing: EddieMunsonxOriginalCharacter

Summary: When a chance at the career he always wanted came knocking at the same time that she received the worst news of her life, they were forced apart. Long distance, time on the road, and stories in the tabloids destroyed anything they had left, leading him down a dark road, playing the role of the bad boy rockstar his manager wanted from him. Now tragedy will bring him back to the town he swore to never step foot in again and face to face with her for the first time in years. Will he be able to stick to the plan or will she be the one habit he can't break?

Word Count: 5.6K

Trigger Warnings: Cancer battle, death of a parent, grief, addiction

18+ Only

Now

“Do they need anything else from her right now?”

“I don’t think so. What more could anybody possibly do right now, anyway?”

“Then we should get her home. She needs to get out of this place and get some rest. Tori? Tori?”

“Huh? What?” she mumbled, shaking herself from her stupor, shocked to find her best friend’s eyes so close to hers. The gray blue of a stormy sea, mirroring the feelings rushing through her right now. A tumultuous tempest that she couldn’t make sense of. Her hands were frantically reaching for purchase but finding none as she was tossed around on angry waves that were threatening to swallow her into the depths and drown her. 

Robin was kneeling in front of her now, her jean covered knees pressed against the tile. She took both of Tori’s hands in hers, keeping her tethered to this space, this chair, this horrible stark white space that she wanted to escape. Everything was so bright, too bright, the glare of it hurting her already burning eyes, aching from exhaustion. She wanted to tunnel down into the floor beneath her feet and disappear, curled up in the Earth, becoming one with the dirt, just like her mother would soon. No more pain. No more grief. No more heartache. Only darkness and peace. 

How was she supposed to do this? How was she supposed to face this world without the person who guided her through it? How was she supposed to go on motherless? No one to tell her she was doing it right or call her out when she was messing up. Isolated, alone, roaming aimlessly with no one to point her on the right path?

“Babe, are you okay?” Robin asked carefully, each word laced with deep concern. “Sorry. That’s a stupid question. Of course you’re not okay. Do you want to go home? You know, you don’t have to do anything else today. Nothing has to be decided right now. It might be better to wait until Lacy’s here so you can do it together.”

“Yeah. You should go home, get some rest, and deal with everything tomorrow. It’s been a hell of a day. Honey, it’s been a hell of a few years for you, especially these past six months. Maybe you need to take a break,” Nancy piped up from the chair next to her, her hand coming to rub what she clearly thought were soothing circles on Tori’s back. 

Tori knew she meant well but her touch was anything but soothing. It just made her want to jump out of her skin, conjuring memories, flashes of her mom’s hands doing the same thing whenever she was sad. 

The time she sat next to her on the bathroom floor all night in fifth grade when she had the stomach flu. Sophomore year when Jenny Simmons has been so mean to her, lying and telling everyone she’d made out with Eric Hoffman behind the bleachers. Junior year when she stormed in the door, sobbing, because she’d just had her first fight with her boyfriend. Five years ago when she’d had to watch that same boyfriend get on a plane and leave her behind. She had come home, barely able to talk, collapsing into a ball on the floor. A year later when she’d made the hardest decision of her life and her mom had held her for hours, rubbing her back as she released all of the pain that was shredding her from the inside, assuring her that it would all be okay.

Now nothing would ever be okay again. How could it? How much could she lose and still keep moving forward? How many pieces of her heart could be lost before it stopped beating altogether?

“I…uh…yeah…” she mumbled, her brain complete mush, as if someone had run it through a food processor, her thoughts minced into pieces she couldn’t fit back together. She was unable to think, unable to process, unable to do much of anything at the moment. “That’s a good idea, probably.”

“I know it is,” Nancy delicately told her, taking charge of the situation as usual. Her hand came to rest under Tori’s elbow, gently guiding her to her feet. “Let us drive you home and get you to bed, okay?”

“Lacy…I have to call…she needs to know…I have to tell her that…”

“I already took care of it,” Robin assured her, taking her other arm, her two friends slowly guiding her through the building and toward the door. She simply allowed it, too tired to argue, too broken to do it on her own. “I called her at school. She’s going to head home first thing in the morning, okay?”

Tori nodded, anything else felt like too much work. She should have been prepared for this. She’d been preparing for this eventuality for the last five years. It had been a certainty for the past six months but she still wasn’t ready. She would never have been ready to say goodbye, would never be ready to live in this world alone, a girl without a mom. That’s what she was now and it didn’t matter that she was twenty-eight, a grown adult who should be able to survive on her own. It wouldn’t have mattered if she was fifty-eight. She didn’t know how to do any of this without her mom. How do you say goodbye to someone who’s been with you your whole life?

Even now, she wanted to call her, to ask her what to do next, to fall apart in her arms and let her fix it the way she always fixed everything. But now it was up to her and Lacy was coming home tomorrow. She was going to be looking to her big sister to take care of everything, to take care of her. Tori could barely care for herself right now. How was she going to take care of anyone else? 

It didn’t matter. She had to. She had to find the strength within her somehow. Her sister was going to need her to be the strong one, to handle everything, to step up and be what their mom no longer could. 

Tori was only vaguely aware as they tucked her into the backseat of Nancy’s car, mumbling, “What about my car?”

“I called Dustin and he and Steve are going to drive over to the hospital to get it,” Robin told her as she slid into the passenger seat. “They’ll drive it back to your house for you, okay? You don’t have to worry about anything besides taking care of yourself right now. We’ve got you.”

Tori nodded, resting her forehead against the cool glass of the window. She was so tired, running on empty, nothing but fumes left in the tank. The last five years had been hard, the last six months had been awful, but the past month had been hell. Long hours sitting at the hospital, spending any time when she wasn’t at work sitting vigil by her mother’s bedside from the moment they told her it was the end. They couldn’t say how long or when but it was inevitable. There would be no more going home. 

Her eyes slid closed, her body desperate to shut down, but horrific images of the last few hours flashed through her mind. The haunting sound of that endless tone that had signaled her life had been irrevocably changed. She snapped her eyes back open. No. She couldn’t relive it. It had been awful enough the first time. 

“Did you call him?” asked Nancy, her hands held tightly at ten and two, forever the responsible driver no matter the circumstances. 

Maybe she could just let Nancy handle everything. She was good at that, stepping up and taking charge. Maybe she could go to the funeral home tomorrow and make all the decisions, take care of Lacy, deal with her dad while Tori allowed herself to sink into blissful nothingness. 

“I tried,” Robin answered with a shrug. “But you know how it is. He’s not exactly the easiest person to reach these days. He’s always busy or flying off somewhere. I left a message for him with his people.” Her tone took on a haughty air as she snorted. “He’s all Mr. Fancy Pants now. Barely has time for those peons he left back in Hawkins. Hopefully he gets it. I can try again tomorrow.”

“I mean…I know the circumstances are awkward and she doesn’t usually want us to say anything but he should know about this, right?” replied Nancy, her eyes glancing up to the rearview mirror, checking on Tori for a moment, before returning to the road. “He loved Linda, too and…”

“Yeah, I know.”

Their mindless chatter was nothing but background noise to Tori, an incessant buzzing in her skull that she couldn’t make sense of even if she tried. And quite honestly, she didn’t have the energy or the desire to make much of an effort at the moment. It didn’t matter what they were talking about. None of it mattered. How could anything possibly matter more than the catastrophic thing that had just happened?

Her eyes glazed over as the world blurred by outside her window. A couple holding hands as they strolled down the street together, a man walking his dog while bopping his head to whatever music was playing through his headphones, an employee on the sidewalk having a smoke break. 

These simple moments of people just living their lives filled her with an irrational sense of rage. How dare they. How could the world just keep spinning as if nothing happened? How could these people just keep on living their lives as if something unspeakable hadn’t just happened? Why wasn’t everything stopping to acknowledge the tragedy? Why wasn’t it recognizing the awful loss that had occurred?

Nancy pulled into her driveway and the car went silent as she turned off the engine. Tori opened the door and made her way up to the porch mechanically. She grabbed the knob, turning it, but nothing happened. Tori stood, glaring at the door as if it had done something terribly wrong to her. Robin appeared at her side, dangling her keys from her fingers. She swiftly unlocked it and three of them headed inside. 

Tori froze just inside the door at the sight of the hospital bed in the living room, the image sending new waves of grief crashing over her, threatening to pull her down under their swells. The entire room tipped and she reached out, instincts kicking in to grab onto something to stop the inevitable crash, when Nancy caught her around the waist, keeping her upright. 

“Whoa there,” she said softly, brushing her hair back from her face. “I got you. It’s okay. Come on. Let’s get you upstairs, alright?” Her eyes turned to Robin, her head tilting toward the hospital bed. 

Robin took the hint, heading in to pull the curtains around it that they had put up for her mom’s privacy. The hospital bed had become a necessity six months ago when her mom grew too weak to make it up the stairs anymore. Tori had taken to sleeping on the couch, wanting to be near in case she needed anything in the middle of the night. For the past month she’d slept on a cot in her hospital room. It felt wrong now to be heading upstairs to her room, to a bed she hadn’t slept in for months, even though there was no reason not to anymore. 

“Did anyone call my dad?” she questioned quietly, not sure where the thought had come from, logic somehow breaking through the haze of grief for a moment. 

“Lacy was going to do that, babe,” Robin assured her, somehow returning without Tori even noticing, the blond now on her other side. “Everything that needed to be done tonight has been taken care of and everything else can wait until tomorrow. All you need to do right now is get some rest, okay?”

Robin led her to the bed, holding her hands and sitting her down as Nancy rummaged in her drawers, finding Tori a pair of sweats and an oversized shirt. The two of them helped her, tugging off her clothes, lifting her limbs, pulling the pajamas on, as if she were a toddler who was incapable of independence. But that’s exactly how she felt right now. She was still just a little girl, a little girl who wanted her mom, who wanted the person who always took care of everything to come and take care of all of this because she didn’t want to. She hated the universe for forcing her to.

Tori glanced down at herself and frowned, some small part of her brain recognized the shirt she was wearing. It was a shirt she never wore, not anymore, because it was attached to another kind of pain, a different loss. It was a shirt that stayed tucked away in a drawer, hidden from sight but always there because she couldn’t bring herself to toss it. 

Seeing it was always like having her heart torn from her chest all over again. But in this moment, not even that pain, the pain that was so unbearable she thought she’d never recover, the pain that was the worst she’d ever felt until tonight when she learned there was another level of hell, couldn’t break through. That awareness of what it meant couldn’t break through. She was already in agony and the last thing she gave a shit about was what she was wearing.

“Alright, how about we lay down now?” Nancy urged, lifting her feet and turning them toward the bed as Robin gently pressed down on her shoulders, her body sinking back into the mattress compliantly. 

Robin pulled the blanket up over her, tucking it under her chin, and sat on the edge of the bed, smoothing her hair back from her face. She fought the urge to slap her friend’s hand away, illogical anger coursing through her at the gentle gesture that should have come from someone else. 

“Just try to get some sleep, okay?” her friend urged. “Close your eyes and get some rest. Everything else can wait until tomorrow.”

Tori’s eyes moved to her bedroom doorway at the sound of someone walking in the front door downstairs. Her brow furrowed in confusion, wondering who would be coming into her house at this time of night. But that was a silly thing to think because she realized she had no idea what time it even was. 

“It’s just Steve and Dustin. They were bringing your car home for you, remember?” asked Nancy quietly, her hand sliding over Tori’s hair before cupping her cheek. “Just go to sleep, Tori. We’ll go down and take care of them.”

“Don’t leave me,” she pleaded softly, her hand grabbing onto Robin’s, clutching it tightly. “Please? I just…I don’t want to be in the house all alone.”

“Never. We’ll be right here all night, okay?” her best friend assured with a squeeze of her hand. “And we will be here when you wake up.”

Tori murmured her understanding, the sleep she’d been fighting for hours finally winning its battle as her eyes closed, exhaustion taking over as she slipped into sweet oblivion. 

___________________________________________________________

The plain, yet organized space, was a stark contrast to the messy, disheveled guy sitting on one of the dark leather couches. A large glass window that ran along the wall would allow any passers-by to see his agitation as his leg jiggled with frustration, fingers raking through his tangled waves. In the corner was a soundproof booth with thick padding to allow for maximum noise isolation but he didn’t need that when he had nothing to work with. Speakers and amps that sat silent, waiting for music that he couldn’t write.

“Son of a bitch,” muttered Eddie, yanking the pencil from behind his ear to scribble out lyrics he’d already written over twenty times. 

This song was turning out to be a pain in his ass. Every single time he thought he had it, he would try to play it and it sounded all wrong. And it wasn’t just this song. It was any song. Something that used to be as natural to him as a river flowing downhill, following the natural curve of the Earth, had suddenly become impossible. 

He chewed on the end of the pencil, metallic and rubbery in his mouth, eyes screwed tightly shut as his head moved to the beat, struggling to find the right words to lay down with it. The problem was, he didn’t even like the music. The intro was messy, the bridge was leading nobody anywhere, and the hook definitely wasn’t hooking anything. And the chorus? Forget it. Their fans would boo them right off the stage with the bullshit he’d been coming up with.

“Man, you’re going to give yourself an aneurysm if you don’t chill out,” Gareth teased as he entered the studio, dropping into a chair that sat in front of the control board. “It’s our time off, Eds. Give it a rest already.”

Eddie glared at his friend, “I can’t give it a rest. I can’t get this goddamn song to work. I can’t get anything to work. Everything I write is fucking wrong lately. It’s like I’ve lost my mojo or something.”

Gareth chuckled, shaking his head, “You haven’t lost anything, man. You’re just overworked. If we’re not on tour, you’re locked in the studio writing. If you’re not writing, then you’re making calls, figuring out the next show, always trying to make everything bigger and better than the last time. You never stop, man. I swear you never even sleep. Maybe your brain is trying to tell you to slow down. If I were you, I’d listen to it. We can’t have our frontman burnt out or all of this work is for nothing anyway.”

Eddie groaned, tossing the pencil onto the table with annoyance. It bounced and then hit the floor, rolling off and under the soundboard. For the last three months, he’d been having a block, finding himself incapable of writing anything that was worthy of another Corroded Coffin album. Every single time he tried, everything just came out absolute shit. He was close to losing his damn mind over it. 

They were at the top of their game right now, the hottest metal band in the country. How were they going to stay on top if he couldn’t come up with any new material?

It happened to so many bands. They became an overnight sensation, sold out stadiums, records gone platinum, only to hit their peak then slide backward after a few years. Pushed to crank out albums quickly, the quality of the craft deteriorated as concern became about keeping up with demand and striking the iron while it was hot. All those people behind the scenes, pulling the strings, wanted to cash in on their payday. And if your band failed? So what? They had thousands just like you waiting in the wings for their six minutes of fame.

Fame was a fickle bitch and if a band didn’t constantly stay relevant, it could snuff out like damp fingertips suffocating a candle’s flame. Instantly and without remorse. Eddie couldn’t let that happen to Corroded Coffin. He wanted them to be one of those groups that stood the test of time, their albums still being bought and played long after they’d left this earth. He didn’t just want fame. He wanted immortality, a legacy he was proud to leave behind. 

His body buzzed with nervous energy, needing something to take the edge off. Eddie pulled his bottom lip between his teeth, worrying at the already torn and flaking skin. He was always hearing it from Amanda, their make-up artist, when she had to buff all the dead skin off his lips and then slather them in Vaseline. 

But not being able to do the one thing that he’d always been sure of, the only thing he knew he was good at, had him on edge. And the only thing that might help, he’d sworn off of, promised his friends he wouldn’t touch that shit again. He’d almost sent the band crashing and burning, torched everything they’d worked for and he couldn’t risk that again no matter how strong the urge was. He couldn’t just toss two years of being clean down the toilet because of some writer’s block. 

“Eds, you’re starting to make me a bit nervous, man,” Gareth told him, angling his body toward him, elbows propped on his knees. He could see that look on his friend’s face, the look he hated, the one he’d worked so hard to keep off his face for the past couple years. “In fact, you’re making all of us nervous. You’ve been off lately. You’ve been real twitchy and moody. It’s bringing back memories, man, memories none of us want to relive. You’re not…”

“No,” Eddie snapped, his hand slamming against the table as he lurched to his feet. His fingers ran through his hair roughly, one of his chunky rings getting caught in the strands, pulling and causing him to wince. “No. I haven’t touched that shit, okay? I haven’t touched it since…that was different. I was in a really bad fucking place, man. I’m not in that place anymore. I dealt with all that shit in rehab and I am still dealing with it. I’ve got it under control. I’m just pissed off at myself. This is what I do, Gareth! I write and play music. If I can’t do that…what the hell else am I even good for?”

“That’s not true. Music is not the only thing you’re good for. Even if all of this ended tomorrow, you are so much more than just a rockstar, Ed,” Gareth assured, rising to his own feet, waving Eddie’s worries off as if they weren’t this giant monstrosity sitting in the middle of the room, keeping him up at night, causing him to chainsmoke until his throat was on fire. “Every writer goes through this shit, man. You really think you’re the first musician who struggled to write? Take a few days off. You can’t force it so give it a break. Do do something relaxing for a while. Get a room at The Biltmore. Chill by the pool and have a few drinks and get some damn sleep and maybe a little sun. You’re starting to look like the undead, my friend.”

“Thanks asshole,” he huffed, snorting with a roll of his eyes. You could always count on a friend to give you the brutal truth and Gareth was an expert at that. Of course Eddie needed that dose of reality from time to time. It was what kept him grounded. It was what kept him clean.

“I mean it. I say this with all love, man, but you gotta do something different. You’re looking less rockstar and more Dracula, and not in a sexy way. I mean, some chicks might be into that pasty, sunken eyes look but only if you can stay upright long enough. Call Gianna and see if she can meet you for the weekend. We don’t have to be in this damn studio for another two weeks. So, get the hell out of here and take advantage of the time off. They’ll have our noses back to the grindstone before you know it.”

Eddie considered his friend’s words. A weekend at The Biltmore didn’t sound half bad. He was drained, absolutely fatigued, running on nothing but black coffee and a dream. He’d been pushing himself hard for the last few months, harder than he ever had, angry that he couldn’t get one damn song right. Music was the only thing that kept him sane anymore. It was the only thing that mattered in his life anymore. Without it, he didn’t know who he was and that terrified the shit out of him. 

He’d had more sleepless nights than he could count, his brain unable to quiet, desperate to find that next great song. That anthem that would have kids from California to Maine banging their heads, devil horns raised proudly. Maybe he did need a break, a chance to reset. Who knew? Maybe it would get his creative juices flowing again. 

Inviting Gianna, now that part he wasn’t so sure about. The last time they’d talked she’d called him a selfish prick, told him to go to hell, and hung up on him. Eddie might not be the smartest guy in the room but he knew how to take a hint. Spending a weekend with him was probably the last thing she wanted to do. Whatever. It was only a matter of time, anyway. He’d known this was coming because it always did. None of them ever lasted.

He hadn’t had a relationship last longer than a couple months since…nope. He shut that thought process down, a door slamming in his brain. That was the name they didn’t speak. The name he did not allow his brain to even think. That name always led to pain, pain that led to…other things. Things he was trying to stay away from. Things he swore to the guys he wouldn’t touch again and he intended to keep that promise. So that name stayed locked up tight where it belonged.

Fingers snapped in his face, jerking him from his thoughts. Gareth stood in front of him, brows meeting in concern. “Hey man, you still with me?”

“Yeah.” He laughed hollowly, shaking his head. “Sorry. I guess I must be even more tired than I thought. I was just thinking that maybe you’re onto something. Maybe I do need to take a break. Maybe I’ll even make it a whole week instead of a weekend. Sleep until noon, order some room service, watch some crappy movies, lay in the sun so I can stop looking like Nosferatu….recharge my battery, you know?”

“There you go!” Gareth exclaimed happily, clapping him on the back. “So you thinking just a solo trip or inviting your girl?”

Eddie snorted, “I’m going solo on this one. Besides, I’m pretty sure she’s not my girl anymore.”

Sighing, his friend gave him the look, the look Eddie had received more times than he could count, especially these last few years. He squeezed Eddie’s shoulder and he knew what was coming but he really didn’t want to hear it again. He knew he was hopeless when it came to relationships. He knew he sabotaged every single one but he couldn’t seem to stop himself. No matter what the guys said, it didn’t make a difference, and it just pissed him off that they felt the need to keep harping on something that wasn’t going to change.

“Eds, you’ve got to stop chasing every single damn girl away,” Gareth groaned. “It’s been years, my friends. Years with an ‘s’, meaning plural. You’ve got to move on at some point. It’s like you think you don’t deserve to be happy but you do. I swear to you, you do. You know she wouldn’t want this for you. She’d hate to see you doing this to yourself. You say you’ve let go and moved on but it sure as hell doesn’t seem like it. I don’t know if you’re still holding out hope that one day Tor…”

Eddie’s hand slapped over his friend’s mouth, cutting him off before he could finish her name. Gareth knew the rules. They all knew the rules. He’d been very explicit about the rules with every single one of them. The rules were in place for a reason and saying that name was the number one no-no. Gareth knew what hearing that name did to him. His friend shoved his hand away, rolling his eyes. 

“Fine, you’re holding out hope that one day the person we don’t name is going to suddenly show up and want you back but it’s not going to happen. You guys broke up four years ago, Eds. You can’t keep destroying every single relationship you have because you’re still waiting for the one we don’t talk about. I know you hoped that one day things would be different and…that unnamed person would come find you but it’s not happening, man. You two haven’t even spoken in four years. Don’t you think it’s time to move on? I’m betting she has.”

“Hey, Eddie!” called his manager, Arty, as he walked in. “I’ve been looking all over for you. What the hell are you doing in the studio, kid? Did you miss the memo that you’ve got two weeks off? You should be out living it up and enjoying your break because I am going to work the hell out of you guys when it’s over. The fans are anxious for the third album. We gotta keep the fires burning red hot, you know. Anyway, we got a message for you. Usually, we ignore that shit because it's just fans trying to find a way in, but this one sounded like it might be legit so I wanted to double check. It was from someone called Robin.”

One simple word, two syllables, a name, and he was spiraling. Jesus, had they known him and Gareth had been talking about her? Was the universe playing some perverse trick on him? His stomach twisted, muscles tensed, the wrench spinning and spinning around the bolts that held him together until he was twisted so tight he couldn’t move. Everything went rigid, strained to its maximum threshold, ready to snap under the slightest pressure. 

The blood whooshed through his head like a tidal wave, pounding in his ears, behind his eyes. Eddie’s hand came down on the table, propping himself up, knowing he had to find out what the message was even if it had the potential to destroy him. There was only one possible reason that Robin would even bother to try to reach him after the last conversation they had.

“She said…” Arty paused, bringing the yellow notepad closer to his aging eyes, unaware of how tightly Eddie’s hand had wrapped around the edge of the table. “Tori’s mom passed away a few hours ago and she felt like you should know. They haven’t made any arrangements yet but she left a number for you to call her back if you want to know the details.”

Arty held out the slip of paper proudly, smiling like he’d just done Eddie some massive favor. The man had no idea what he’d just done. He’d taken over their management almost three years ago once they got too big for the guy they’d had before. When playing smaller venues turned into massive arenas, Todd could no longer handle it. He was more of a small time guy. That was when Arty swooped in, a guy who’d worked with some of the biggest names in the industry when they started to take off. That was his specialty, not getting you to the top but helping you stay there once you’d reached it. 

He knew about Eddie’s substance abuse issues, but he never knew why he’d first touched the stuff. He didn’t know why the idea of forgetting everything, of not being in control of his own faculties, of just allowing himself to get swept under the bad boy rockstar image had been so appealing to him. But Arty had been the one to kick his ass and get him into rehab, telling him he was going to destroy everything, that he was a ticking time bomb sitting in the center of the band, that was going to explode and decimate it all if he didn’t get his shit together. He’d seen bigger bands than them fall apart over the same shit. 

Eddie’s eyes darted over to Gareth’s, his best friend since they were kids, the one who understood exactly what this meant, how this news was causing him to spin out of control like a car careening on the highway. That careful wall he’d built around anything that had to do with her was crumbling apart around him, massive chunks tumbling and smashing to the ground to expose everything he worked so hard to conceal. 

Gareth stepped forward, taking the paper from his hands, looking down at the hastily scrawled set of numbers as if Robin herself were going to leap off the page. He looked back up at Eddie, eyes wide.

“Vacation plans changed?” he asked knowingly and Eddie didn’t miss the flash of fear in his friend’s eyes, the way his jaw stiffened into granite. He knew exactly how hard it would be if Eddie made this choice. He knew what the potential fallout could be. But he was going to have to take the risk because what other choice did he have?

“I guess my vacation time is going to be spent in Hawkins…” Eddie murmured, eyes falling back to the paper again, his brain struggling to catch up with the decision he’d just made, the repercussions of what he was about to do. 

“Hawkins? Where the hell is Hawkins?” Arty asked with a snort. “Sounds like some podunk town if I ever heard one.”

Eddie lifted one eyebrow along with a shoulder. “That’s exactly what it is. Some podunk town in Indiana.”

“So, what the hell is in Hawkins that’s got you spending your precious time off there?”

“Everything,” he whispered, snatching the paper back from Gareth and striding out of the room. 

Here it is! Hope you all enjoy. As always, I would love to hear your thoughts. I am forever trying to better my writing so feedback is always welcome and reblogs are always appreciated. Let me know if you want to be added to the taglist. And if you do, please make sure your age is on your profile. I will not add if it's not.

Taglist: @browneyes528 @chevelle724 @tlclick73 @transparentenemypenguin @missmarch-99

#eddie munson #stranger things eddie #eddie the banished #eddie munson smut #eddie munson fic #eddie the freak munson #eddie munson rockstar au #eddie munson rockstar #rockstar eddie munson #eddie munson x oc #long lost love #second chance romance #second chance at love #grief #tw grief #tw death of a family member #tw addiction #tw adult themes #soulmates #meant to be #smut #fluff #angst #angst with a happy ending #smut and fluff #fluff and angst #fluff and smut

[casketscratch]

Big fuzzy sweater.

Big fuzzy purring lap warmer.

♥️

#my brain is reeling and #idk it's something hormonal and etc bc my T ultimately got too low and I've been getting regular periods again #which does mean I'm LESS stressed than before! #but every time emotionally? I feel such total fear and dread #like I'm waiting to die and I can never stop crying and begging at #nothing? #they're the hardest emotional cycles to get through but #I'm trying and we're doing it #tomorrow will be better and it's hard to sob when #look at that cat #progress? idk #recovery something

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

#ok. this is the fucking bullshit thing abt grad school. u go to fucking grad school bc u r a fucking tryhard nerd freak #who is either naturally very smart or ur so fucking anxious u r incapable of allowing urself to get a bad grad #and then u go to fucking grad school and everyone's like: man fuck ur classes. if youre getting streight As then u aren't focusing on ur #research. and theyre right. but u still cant fucking let go of the idea that if u get a bad grad the world is gonna fucking end and u r a #bad person. u didnt try hard enough. all this to say i have a final project that i put way too much energy into and not even in a good way #i would just open the document. start sobbing. and then close it and spiral abt how i didn't want to work on it. so its bullshit #i mean. its a good project idea ans i probably sound like i kno wtf im talking abt bc i do. i worked on that topic for 4 years but like #i could make it wayyyyy better. its bullshit. i didnt even number the citations to give more page space. i made section headers. i didnt #wrap text. i could add like 4 more lines of text if i wanted but i think im not gotta bc fuck it. ugh. i dont even. i fucking avoide #stochastic stuff altogether which i kno im gonna have to fight abt but like fuck it who cares abt randomness. i just wanna focus on the #predictably aspect of community composition. fuck u. i shouldnt have picked this topic. i mean. i had to bc its like the one microbe thing #i could do but its also like the exact topic that makes me wanna rip my hair out and start screaming. like jesus christ who tf cares? ugh. #i think id give myself a B if it was an undergrad class. but the standard is higher in an all grad class. ugh. i hate this. i should just #send it abd be done. i dont even kno when its due tomorrow. before class i guess. idk i felt like garbage today. fucking vertigo bby. i feel #ok now tho. so maybe the allergic reacting is over???? fingers r still arthritisy tho. jesus. im falling apart #ive got a pretty good sounding excuse for being lazy tho: owo i had an allergic reaction to my antidepressants 🥳 but nah no excuses we run #this body into the ground. like the good old days. #unrelated

[pepprs]

cringe btw. fail a little bit as well

#purrs #not really happy with how i showed up and navigated situations and circumstances today. i think i was not as kind or respectful as i could h #have been. and there’s nothing i can do but live with it and try to do better tomorrow. but this shit is so fucking hard and horrible. this #is not what i thought i was signing up for. this is not how i thought this month would go. and i know it’s normal and natural and whatever f #for like. every aspect of this process to be happening (and yet also cringe and stupid etc) but i just wish it wasn’t happening. i don’t #want to be responsible for planing your fucking goodbye gift i want you to stay. i don’t want to fucking go on a walk with you (i mean i #quite literally do LOL but) i want to keep yearning for i and working towards asking for it naturally and not in wretched circumstances. i #don’t want to have responsibility for all the tasks and people coming into the office and giving me knowing and pitying looks and asking how #this is going and meaning both me starting something and you leaving i want the whole you leaving part to just not even be a thing. i know I #it could be worse i know it’s fucking stupid to be addressing my literal actual supervisor as ‘you’ in the tags of a tumblr post she will #never read but it’s like fucking hell. i care about you so much. this has been a nightmare and i want it to be over but it won’t be ever. an #and i have to live with this somehow and i know it will feel better but for now im just fumbling through it and hurting and suffering and it #like doesn’t even matter. idk. the timing just hurts. it really does. as does the whole thing. idk when i’ll stop being hurt but i am hurt #delete later #i think i said this but i literally have to get assigned a fucking ‘cultural contact’ bc she’s leaving and can’t guide me thru this like i #always dreamed she would. the literal actual slap in the face of it.my heart hurts lol #it’s not just work also. like i know i am a freak about work on the dash but it really is not just work. or it is but it’s like. idk. ugh i #feel so trapped in this i fucking hate it and everyone is gonna tell her / me / us / whatever that this is good and normal and expected and #we’ll be okay etc but it’s NOT. it WON’T. we’re family or something like that and she’s leaving it and me and * are sobbing and * is like ha #having to be strong for us bc both of us are mentally ill wrecks over it and i know he is too and it’s killing me and meanwhile * just fucks #off across the country and we only see her TWO more times???? are you kidding me? LOL! like you just leave? lolllllll. after everythinggggg! #which she’s entitled to do. but it’s like. i thought we all understood… but apparently we weren’t on the same page. and now we’re here. LOL #anyway i am not being any less cringe or fail by continuing to post about this to redacted number of ppl but idk how else to cope. gn lawl #one more thing my heart hurts sooooooo bad. like physically. that is just sick in the head. wtf

[snowsinterlude]

🎀 - private classes, lacy panties and strawberry prints.

summary: your mother and your father trusted coriolanus snow with their lives, especially seeing how good your grades have gotten. but of course, the way he made you pay attention to what you were learning was a secret.

content warning: oral recieving (f.), fem reader, squirting, mentions to a blowjob, thigh riding, snow teasing you both sexually and verbally, dirty talk, smut, p in v, nsfw (mdni), dom snow, sub reader, creampie.

w.c: 2.083

first things first, you need to remind how coriolanus snow, heir of the snow name and everything that came to it, was now sitting between your legs, kneeling while his fingers teased your pussy through your panties.

on the dinner your father held to celebrate the development of his business growing up and being praised by the current president of Panem, your mother was in charge of the guest list, so of course she invited the Snow family, his cousin and his grandma'am.

you didn't expect it, but you should have expected that she would embarass you like this in front of your classmate.

"coriolanus, you're such a peach! i can't believe such a smart handsome young man like that still exists." you looked at her, lip syncing for her to stop, she didn't even bat an eye at you.

"i'm flattered, truly. but i'm sure i'm not the only one on the capitol with good manners." he said, smiling kindly at your mother. god, if he knew how your heart beat stronger when you saw this smile of his, you'd be damned. "your daughter, for exemple, is the sweetest girl i've ever had the pleasure to speak to. even though we only talked today." he said, the glass of posca on his hand travelling all the way to his lips but you could see how small his sip was.

"oh don't praise her too much, her grades are not as sweet as she is." she laughed, and you swear to god you preferred to die than to listen to that talk. "perhaps you could teach her a bit? i'd be glad to pay you."

"mom!" you called out, turning to him and shaking your hands "don't listen to her, please. truly, i don't want to bother you."

"non-sense, i'd be glad to teach you. and it would be even better actually, i'd have the chance to review the content of our classes." he smiled sweetly to you, and you thought you could melt right away from how shaky your legs were. "when can we start?"

he asked you, not your mother. you. and for the first time you felt seen, you felt like your opinion mattered.

"tomorrow, eight p.m..?" you asked, your eyes felt so wide looking at him, and he laughed, nodding positively.

"i'll see you at the library, don't be late." he patted your head. it was a swift move, and you blinked rapidly as you saw him walk away.

so, now, on your first class together, snow kissed you deeply, his hand gripping hard on your waist as you kissed him back. you didn't even know how it came to that by this point, but right now, it was the fifth library study meeting you had with him and the teasing he was making you pass through was too torturing.

"tell me, dear. what's the answer?" he asked, kissing your inner thighs and making your body shiver.

"i-i don't... i-i can't think straight like that, coryo, i-" he sucked on the fabric of your wet panties, your body jolting as his lips made contact with your sensitive clit, sucking on it and letting it go with a delicious wet pop sound.

"you can do better than that, c'mon. what's the answer, dove?" he licked you entirely, from your cunt to your clit, right through your panties. "you know you're not dumb, you just need to think harder."

"i-i know, i just- ah-" you moaned a bit when he pulled your panties aside, blowing on your clit and chuckling at how wet you were. so sweet, so pretty, he couldn't help but suck on your cunt.

"you're so sensitive, you just need to answer me and i'll let you cum, c'mon." he rubbed your clit a bit, slowly, your tears appearing as you sobbed a bit. "how many people Panem have in it's entirety?"

"3.5 m..million, coryo." you moaned out, thrusting your hips forward. it was too brain-mushing. you were looking so dumb and he didn’t even touched you directly- only his tongue.

"wrong, dear." he smiled to your despair, his lips kissing your clit before he sat by your side, pulling you to sit on his thigh with your back turned to him. "it's 4.5 million. c'mon, you knew it."

his hands found your waist pretty quickly, guiding you to ride his thigh back and forth, his kisses on your neck made you pout at the whole thing. he was such a tease.

"another question, if you get it right, i have a reward to you, okay?" you nodded submissively while he pinched your nipple, you didn't recall when but his hand slyly travelled to your boob through inside your blouse. "how many districts panem originally had?"

it was terrible. your pussy was grinding on his thigh like you were a bitch in heat, his pants were getting damped by you and you were oh so sensible it seemed like a joke.

"t-thirteen." you answered, and he smiled proudly, giving your clit a light slap which made you jolt violently. he sat you prettily on the desk, pulling his cock out.

"see? when you want to do get something right, you can. you just have to desire it." he said, passing his tip through your smooth wet pussy, his dick getting coated with your juices. "now, let's do some more to see if you got it right, okay?"

"mhm." you hummed, lips red and glossy, a result of the overstimulation you were recieving.

"good girl. now, how long did panem exist before the dark days?" he asked, kisses being placed on your neck.

"i-i don't know- i... uh, t..twenty years?" you attempted, only to be answered with his cock slapping your pussy, making you mewl.

"god, you're such a whiny baby. it's okay, i'll teach you that later. want to try another question?" he asked you, his tip teasing your hole. you nodded frantically. "good. now, why does the hunger games exists?"

"i-it's a punishment to the districts- because of the rebellion. a-and the rebellion is the motive to why d..district 13 don't exists anymore." he kissed you, smiling at you while pushing his dick inside, making you melt away any kind of inteligence you still had.

"god, you're so tight-" he moaned, thrusting slowly into you. the slowest he was, the more you cried, begging and sobbing for release, trying to move your hips on his dick. "shh, calm down, dove. it's just a few seconds and we'll be all good to go, okay?" he smiled when you nodded, pathetic. "such a good bitch. i'll let you suck my dick later."

your eyes seemed to shine at it, your mouth felt like drooling. "t-truly?"

"uhum. you've been such a good girl, let's make this your reward, okay?" you nodded frantically.

"t-thank you." and he thrusted faster into you, his rhythm quickening up more and more to the point your breasts were bouncing and he couldn't help but suck on them, his mouth messily sucking your nipples and fondling them kindly.

"you're so good to me, i can't help myself around you knowing your pussy feels so good on my cock." he growled, lips brushing on your as he spoke, kissing you messily while you moaned into the kiss, your pussy squeezing on him and milking his cock. "you're already cumming? god you're so desperate." he chuckled, pulling out of you while you cried out, your pussy clenching, missing his dick.

however, your leg was on his shoulder already, while his mouth sucked your pussy just as eagerly as you wanted to suck his dick, your scent filling his senses while he nipped lightly on your clit making you grip on his hair, your warm gummy walls squeezing his two fingers into you, but of course, two fingers weren't the same as his dick.

but, to your pleasure, he had the perfect fingers to your pussy, thrusting them quickly on your pussy while you melt away, calling his name, trying to warn him.

"c-coryo, coryo! p-please- g-god, stop! stop! i-i n-need to pee- i-" he smiled on your cunt, you were so innocent sometimes, how could you not know that this was just your body wanting to squirt?

he opened his mouth, sucking more of you on him, you moaned and cried out, squirting on his mouth as he smiled at you.

"i-i'm sorry, i'm sorry, i didn't want to-" he pecked a kiss on your lips, chuckling as you licked it, tasting yourself.

"that's a squirt, baby. that's not piss." he said, putting his cock inside of your overstimulated pussy, filling you entirely. "you should've seen your face, so cute."

"t-that's not funny" you said, nails scratching his shoulders and neck while he thrusted faster into you.

"yes, it is. you looked like a whore, you know?" he kissed your temple, licking the tears on your cheek. "all needy and wet for my dick. as if i haven't fucked you yesterday too."

"'s because y-you're too mean!"

"mean? me? and how is it?" he thrusted faster, pinching your nipples and making you mewl your cries out.

"y-you're always teasing me, a-and your fingers, t-they're always teasing my pussy too. you know it!"

"i know." he chuckled. "i can't help it. you're always so pretty and dolled up for me, you can't blame me for fucking you when your pussy is milking my cock like that." he said, nibbling on your nipple.

"c-coryo, i-i think i'm gonna cum again" you warned, but he didn’t care, and even when you did cum, he kept going until his balls twitched, his cum filling you up while your eyes were squeezed shut and your mouth was all red from all the times you bit your bottom lip.

"god, such a pretty bitch." he whispered, making you shiver while he pulled alway and dressed you on your pathetic panties again. "you're gonna sleep with my cum inside you, okay? i want you to."

you nodded in a pathetically submissive way, too dumb to contest.

"dear! dear, y/n's report card is here!" your mother yelled to your father, making you mewl in discontempt as you got out of your room with coryo, who had to stop mid way to get your hair brushed by his fingers and quickly straight your clothes.

"oh my.." your father seemed surprise as he analysed your grades. proud, even. since he always seemed too unhappy with your grades.

"what is it?" your mother asked, looking over his shoulder.

"her grades are much better than ever, great heavens, i can't believe it. it's almost a miracle!" your father said, smiling proudly. "dear, i'll let you have your credit card back, you can buy whatever you want okay? daddy will buy your favorite cake later." he said, patting your head and turning to coryo. "boy, i need to thank you, how can i ever repay you?"

"you don't need to, sir. i'm glad to help your daughter anyway." he said, smiling as your father patted his shoulder. "i can keep on helping her if it is of your liking."

"yes, please. it would be incredible if you did." your father said, giving your report card to your mother, who squealed happily while hugging you and saying something about framing your report card in a gold rosé frame. "but i may ask, coryo.."

"yes?" he asked.

"how did you get her to memorize it? we hired the best particular teachers in the capitol and she never improved. how did you do it?" your father asked.

"ah... it is just a particular studying method i invented. i'm afraid it is a secret, sir." coriolanus laugh filled your ears, and you wanted to laugh too, but you licked your lips only, tasting his dick on your lips.

"i understand it. please keep doing the good job. i'm glad you're teaching my daughter." your father said, giving you two permission to go back to fucking studying.

when you arrived to your room, coryo locked the door and you immediatly dropped to your knees, unbuckling his pants as you salivated eagerly for him.

"i'm proud of you, dove." he smiled, caressing your hair as you smiled too, his cock slapping your face a bit once it got out of it's confines, but you didn’t care, next thing you knew was that your head was bobbing on his cock and your panties were fulfilled by the time he left.

#tbosas smut #young president snow #young coriolanus snow #coriolanus snow x reader #the hunger games the ballad of songbirds & snakes #coriolanus snow fanfiction #coriolanus snow imagine #coriolanus x reader #coriolanus x you #x you #x reader #dom coriolanus #dom character #sub reader

[dolldefiler]

[An alternative take on something I wrote before. Had half an hour to spare before I needed to disappear again. If I’m not getting railed by more coursework tomorrow, I’ll write a smidgen more :)]

C/W: Rape, obsessive love

God, why do you keep struggling? Can’t you see that I love you? Can’t you feel it? I’ll never let go of your hair. Have I ever told you how beautiful I think it is? How I love it long and silky like this? It’s perfect for-- stop fucking STRUGGLING-- for dragging you across the floor. If you only just loved me back, I wouldn’t need to do this.

Can’t you see that I’m doing this for your own good? Slap. God, I-I’m so sorry for doing that. I- you just need to understand. You’re just making it worse for yourself. Please. I’m begging you. Just let it happen. God, I’m sorry for slapping you so many times. Why can’t you see that you need it?

Why are you screaming? My cock was made to fit in your pussy. Please, I hate seeing you so sad. No, of course you don’t need foreplay. You were made for me. It should feel good even when you’re dry. G-god, you’re so tight. You’re so warm. You always feel so fucking good. Do you also feel good? Are you feeling it too? Why aren’t you saying anything? Answer me. ANSWER ME! Oh, sorry, was I choking you too hard? Is that why you didn’t say anything? I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to beat you so badly and choke you so tightly. I needed to stop you from doing something silly. You understand, right? I love you.

I-is it wrong that it makes me throb seeing you cry and in pain like this? It’s not, is it? We all have our own little quirks. This is fine, right? You enjoy being hurt. I know you do. You must do. I want to be the only person that ever hurts you. I want to be the only person that ever pleasures you. Oh shit, I’m going to cum. Oh my god. Did you clench around me? Did you want me to cum inside you that badly? Why are you sobbing harder? Fuck. FUCK. Shit, that’s good.

I think it’s time for my second course. No, no, don’t cry like that. I swear it’ll be amazing, my princess. You’ll give up your most intimate hole for me. I just need to lube up your ass with your cunt- I mean, pussy drool and my cum… and… FUCKKK. Oh shit, you’re amazing. Your ass is fucking divine. Oh god, I can feel your butt vibrate around my cock when you scream. Are you doing that for me? To milk my cock better? You’re so thoughtful. But you’re getting a little loud. I said you’re getting a little loud. 

Don’t you understand? SHUT. THE. FUCK. UP. AND LET ME ENJOY YOUR ASS IN PEACE.

Thank you. I’m sorry for hitting you but you really deserved it, didn’t you haha? I love you more than the world itself. I’d never hit you for no reason. I-I just want what’s best for you. If I really wanted to hurt you… Well, you saw my tools the day I started looking after you, didn’t you?

Now just hold still while I-- Ugh, you’re so hot. It’s like your asshole’s stroking my cock with every thrust. I’ll go harder now. I’m sorry, sweetie, but I need it. I need to fuck your asshole harder. Shit, sweetie? Hello? Are you… did you pass out? Well, I’m sure you’d hate for me to stop on your account.

…

Oh SHIT, yes, yes, yes. Hello, my love, are you awake again? Why are you not saying anything? Why is your face twisted like that? You look like you’re in pain. Hello? I didn’t bother stopping because I knew you’d appreciate it if I carried on. You’re the best, you know? This is why I love you so much. God, wow, it’s like when you woke up, your butthole decided to drain my dick. I can’t stop. I won’t stop. THIS IS WHAT YOU WERE MADE FOR. FUCK, I’m draining my fucking balls inside your butt. 

Hey, no, don’t cry. You can stop crying. Stop crying or I’ll fucking beat you again. You know I hate seeing you sad. It breaks my heart.

#rapekink #rapetoy #rapedoll #rough kink #r@pe fantasy #cnc k!nk #r@pe kink #free use slvt #r@pe play #r@pe k!nk #r4p3 kink #obsessive love #dark kinks #bd/sm dom #bd/sm slave

[l13]

spiderverse twt links part 2

WARNINGS : NSFW, 18+ ONLY, MINORS DNI, f!reader, the links are literally p#rn, proceed at your own risk

CHARACTERS: miguel o'hara, peter b parker, hobie brown, the spot, spider noir, webslinger

miguel

♡ miguel playing with your pussy as he sucks on your tits- getting you ready to take his cock, like the good girl you are<3

♡ this is for that one anon that sent me a hc about miguel getting pissed af if he caught you using one of your toys- ((I SAW IT AND IT WAS AMAZING I'VE WROTE SMTH BUT IT'S BEEN ON MY DRAFTS FOR LIKE A WEEK i can't seem to like it no matter how much i edit it but have this<333)) Miguel who then proceeds to snatch the toy from your grasp, muttering how you can't even come even with that. "S good right? Better than me?" "Noo, never- never better than you- oh please baby-" "That's fucking right."

bonus

♡ miguel punishing you when you arrive home after you talking shit all day- purposefully disagreeing on anything he says- even in mission briefs. makes sure to fuck you stupid just to remind you not to pull that shit again<3 "Acting like such a fucking bitch all day- fuck. Just needed my cock that bad, huh? Say it,"

peter

♡ peter whimpering pathetically once he starts cumming- moaning when you don't stop jerking his cock, and he's thrashing around, hips never stopping their little jumps as he whines prettily "I can't anymore- h please ffuckkkk, I ca-aan't," voice cracking as he sobs for you

♡ pussydrunk!peter that starts fucking you like an absolute madman, literally not able to stop thrusting inside of you even after he's cum two times already, his eyes are hazy, can barely focus on anything but he still grabs you by the hair to pull you against him almost harshly, panting hard as he somehow keeps fucking his cock back inside your drenched pussy

♡ peter laying flush against your back, humping you, thrusting his cock inside you till he's crying with you- whimpering and moaning from the way your pretty pussy feels around his cock

hobie

♡ hobie definitely wakes you up in the middle of the night if he can't sleep- pulls your panties to the side and makes you ride him, watching with a hand behind his head as you bounce your ass on his cock- thrusting his hips up to meet the rolls of your hips as he sighs, "Fuck- think I'll be wakin' you up every God damn night, baby.." "Yeah do it- fuckin' make me cum-"

♡ hobie losing his FUCKING mind when he sees you hold your folds open for him- giving him the perfect view of his cock entering your pussy again and again-

♡ no bccc. NO BECAUSEEEEEEE. tell me why he'd do this. he'd def dry hump you till you're both moaning against each other's mouths before he'd fuck you, refusing to remove his underwear from before- saying he likes looking at them all stained with your juices as you bounce up and down his cock<3

spider noir

♡ tw!!!somno noir loving seeing you wear tights/stockings, and absolutely loses his mind when he sees you laying like that on the couch- skirt bundled up on the floor, you'd probably taken it off right before laying down, and fuck- it's so fucked up that he's doing this but he can't help himself as he takes his cock out, slapping it against your ass two-three times before he starts jerking it, slowly, "So pretty for me honey.. 'nd you don't even know it," "Fuck- sorry- I'm sorry- I can't stop, can't fuckin' stop-"

♡ noir letting you control the pace for once as he leans back, supporting his weight with his palms on the mattress as you bounce your ass on his cock vigorously- and he's grunting, muttering praises, until he gets greedy and grabs you by the hips to thrust inside you with a new-found passion, "Did so well for me, such a good girl- unh-" "I'll fuck you so well, don't you worry-" "Won't be able to fuckin' walk tomorrow, honey."

♡ feel like noir would be used to more 'old fashioned' shit so when he met you, he'd become 10x times more freaky- that includes cumming on your face 🤭 he'd be reluctant at first- "Why waste it? You're tellin' me you don't want it in your pussy, hm?" but then he actually does it one time and becomes OBSESSED, "God fucking- I'm gonna cum-" "Where d'you want it sweetie," "Yeah? Ffuck yes- gonna paint your pretty face with my cum-"

the spot

♡ we've established that spot is a certified pussy eater, even without a mouth he'd find a fucking way- he'd just push your cunt into his face hole, and lap at your pussy greedily- moaning as he did so

♡ tw!! pegging jonathon? OH MY GODDDDDDDD and he's moaning so good for you too<3

♡ spot unable to stop pushing his hips back into your hand as you finger one of his holes- the feeling bringing tears into his eyes as he cries out for you<33

♡ him nearly YELLING when he comes inside you- moaning loudly as he pumps you full of his cum<3

webslinger

♡ tw!! breeding kink "Legs up f'me darlin'.... just like that," thrusts into you relentlessly, head thrown back as he literally cannot handle how good your pussy feels around his cock, and he grunts as he pulls out, jerking his cock, his hand shaking, "Can't cum inside you huh, pretty? Can't get you pregnant- not yet-"

♡ him finally slipping and coming inside you- moaning with his eyes rolled back as he feels your cunt sucking him in- "Ah shit- m sorry darlin' I couldn't hold m'self back.."

♡ him pounding you from the back and then suddenly deciding that he wants to watch you ride him instead- (save a horse, ride a cowboy), absolutely looooves watching your face contort in pleasure, your tits bouncing as you guide yourself up and down his cock<3

#•ूᡣ𐭩 — visuals #•ूᡣ𐭩 — noir #•ूᡣ𐭩 — peter b #•ूᡣ𐭩 — spot #•ूᡣ𐭩 — hobie #•ूᡣ𐭩 — webslinger #•ूᡣ𐭩 — miguel #miguel o'hara x reader #peter b parker x reader #spider noir x reader #hobie brown x reader #miguel ohara x reader #miguel ohara smut #spider noir smut #hobie brown smut #spiderpunk x reader #spiderpunk smut #webslinger x reader #webslinger smut #the spot x reader #the spot smut

[princessbrunette]

imagine rafe not being able to spend the night and your house bc he has like early business to do and you’re just so whiny begging him not to leave like clinging to his leg and he’s like “jesus christ i’ll be back tmr 😒” but at the same time he’s like 😊 bc it’s nice to feel needed

─── ⋆⋅🛼⋅⋆ ──

you were clingy and you knew it. instead of pretending like you weren’t, you learnt to fully embrace it. no matter how much rafe tried to act like he didn’t, you knew he loved it deep down. it made him feel wanted, something not many other people in his life offered him.

he pats his keys in his back pocket as he slowly makes his way to your front door, lips parted as he thinks over everything he had on his person when he arrived, making sure to leave none of it behind. it was bad today, you really needed him. after the day you had, you wanted nothing more than to fall asleep on his chest, feeling safe and just… better. you cry, pathetic and hiccupy as you keep a clasp on his hand and he lets you hold it all the way to the door before pulling himself out of your grasp.

“okay, hey— can’t keep cryin’ like this baby you knew i wasn’t stayin’ over tonight because i told you. gave you time to… emotionally prepare n’shit. i got business to do early tomorrow, remember?” he raises his eyebrows, trying to reason with you. his voice is stern but he’s mopping up your tears with his thumb anyway.

“i know but i had a bad day, i just want you to sleep here!” you sob, clutching over his wrists as his hands clean you up and he shakes his head, gently removing them.

“look i’m — i’m sorry, alright? you know i wanna stay here, more than anything. but i’m a man now, yeah? i’m in charge of handlin’ business n’i got people relying on me. sometimes you— you have to make the hard choice, and this is one of those times.” he lectures you, so you do what any reasonable human being would do, and lower yourself to the ground, wrapping yourself around his leg.

“you’re not going.” you swipe your tear on his pants and he sighs in exasperation, trying to wiggle you off to no avail.

“jesus fuckin’ christ, are you kidding? get up, hey—” he tries to walk, but you cling him tighter, coming with him and he stops again. “let go and listen to me. m’gonna count to three, don’t let me get there.” he lifts up a finger and you unlatch yourself, staying on the ground in a ball. rate lowers himself into a squat, expression stern and yet yielding. “alright. you’re gonna calm down, yeah? i will sit with you until you fall asleep, and it better be within the hour or i’m just gonna leave. get up, c’mon. go brush your teeth.” he stands, giving you a little nudge with his foot and you hop up, happy enough with the outcome of him staying a little longer and run upstairs, not waiting for him to follow.

he huffs out an exasperated sigh, shaking his head. “little shit.” he whispers, following you. once you’re all in bed, ready — he comes and sits beside you, mopping up the last remaining tears that stain your face with the backs of his knuckles. “okay. i’m here. now go to sleep.”

“kiss, rafe.” you pucker your lips and he indulges you, bringing you a nice long one to satisfy you before pulling back.

“close your eyes.” he sighs tiredly and you do so, but not before switching off your lamp. he places a hand on your back over your pyjama shirt, rubbing slow circles as if tries to silently coax you to sleep faster so he can get going, smiling secretly to himself at your shenanigans.

he won’t admit it, but he did feel really sad to go, and even considered staying— but he knew he had to make the responsible choice, so with one final look, he left you in your bedroom fast asleep.

─── ⋆⋅🛼⋅⋆ ──

#anon #rafe cameron prompt

[inkskinned]

i'm used to it, and how bad it is, and how often it's so bad that it rings like a bell inside of me, drowning out everything around me. and the truth is that i get frustrated with myself about it - again? we're like this still? again? it's not that i feel weak, precisely. it's just this sense almost like - i've already been pushing against this thing for years now, shouldn't i have gained more ground?

i get frustrated because i'm sick of picking up the loose ends every six months. i get frustrated because it's always this same shit, same problem - i lose myself in a matter of months; spiral out of control, lose touch with friends and loved ones. i stop taking care of myself and therapy gets hard and i let everything around me wilt and shrivel and fall off; start somehow both sleeping too much and not-enough. i panic-attack and cry in my car in a target parking lot, pulling my hair out and hurting my ribs from sobbing so hard - and later, when i'm better, i'm embarrassed because how could i let it get that far?

it feels like - i already have done this so many times. isn't there a way out of it? isn't there a point where i've just... won? that it never happens again, that i just get to be done? maybe this is weakness, i guess - that i still (so often!) succumb.

i am used to it, so i forget exactly how hard it gets. do you even know how many times i've laid in bed, exhausted, blank and numb and listless and said - i can't anymore. i just can't. i'm not even really upset. it's okay. i've been here long enough. so much of my life was beautiful.... i'm just... done.

do you know how many times i woke up and i said - i can't and put my feet on the floor and said i can't, i don't want to and took a shower and walked the dog and bought myself fresh bread and put a nice playlist on and said i really can't, there's no end to this and i went to work and i called a friend and i made myself cookies even if food tasted like ashes and decided that i really should wait for the new album from that artist i love and i thought i can't, it's not worth it and then i washed my hands and cut my hair and drank more water and wrote a poem and signed up for an art class at the local community college and said i can't, i can't, i won't do this again, and i paid my rent and let the dishes rot in the sink but still made myself eat anything fresh even if it meant overdrawing my account on a stupid bag of plums just because they looked delicious and do you know how often i closed my eyes and thought this is it i really fucking can't, something has to give and i have nothing left that it can take and then i went to bed and i got up and i fucking survived anyway

yesterday the local ice cream place opened up for the first time this season and they were giving out tiny samples of their new dairy-free options and i tried a mango sorbet. three months ago i was positive that februrary was going to be my last month on the planet. i am teaching my dog a new trick and i just discovered a new band i love. i got a plant from the clearance aisle and repotted her and she's been perking up. i made salmon for alison and we ate it in her new house with her new beautiful baby girl. my manager told me he keeps recommending my work to others just because i always include a stupid number of puns. tomorrow i'm trying a new dance class. tomorrow i'm maybe going to buy more plums.

i forget, you know? it's not some bone-deep strength or some magical power. it's that some part of me knows - i need to stay. in all of this; out of all of this - i just want to choose love.

#writeblr #this is too honest and writing it made me cry #sorry #poetry

[arminsumi]

SANCTUARY

💗 GOJO さとる

warnings : angst, some fluff (?), satoru is such an asshole on the exterior 🥹, not proofread

the strongest... falling in love with the weakest. he's bullied n teased u about being the weakest, a weakling; "how did they let someone like you into jujutsu tech?"

he's so mean and condescending. he trails alongside u on missions. he asks "hey, bet you missed me" when he intrudes on missions that you very nearly had under control. he watches you from the bleachers as you hopelessly practice martial arts with suguru. he steals your quiz papers when the teacher isn't looking.

but of course... he has ulterior motives. his exterior is just a big act, he's really just a teenager who belongs in the drama club.

he's sticking to ur side during missions to protect ur "stupid weak ass". he's always popping his face into a scene to make sure that curse doesn't escape, cuz otherwise he has to listen to you getting another reprimanding from yaga. satoru's the one who asked suguru to teach you martial arts every day, encouraging his best friend to grill the movements into your brain. and he steals your quiz papers to quickly rub out all the wrong answers you filled in, and correct them so that tomorrow you're met with a baffling A* grade.

he's doing everything he can to keep you from being expelled.

yet he stands in front of you, hands lazing in his pockets, taunting you about being a shorty who can't fight for shit. "you're one of those fucking weaklings i have to protect..." he says bitterly, through gritted teeth... but he doesn't mean it how you interpret it. he's so upset with the world, and how he has to work hard to protect someone who deserves to be born into an idyllic paradise.

when you're making that defeated frown, looking helpless on the floor after losing to a curse, he glares over and yells "what are you doing... get up." and he forces you to get on your feet.

he's confusing, isn't he? how he tells you in the school corridors on hot summer days, "you're too weak to fight for yourself." and then when you're unconscious after encountering a special-grade, he clutches your body protectively and sobs, "are you crazy? why wouldn't you call me... hey, keep your eyes open..." he's furrowing his brows at you, expression angry not because you're weak... but because this world treats frail people terribly and he hates it with all his soul. he doesn't want to see you fighting. he doesn't want to see you practicing jujutsu. he doesn't want you to ever see another curse's morbid face again.

he's determined to turn the world into a sanctuary for you. that's what he puts in his wedding vows to you, when the two of you reach the age of 25. and he doesn't break it, he doesn't falter, he always keeps good pace and drains and exhausts himself in order to mold the shape of the world to fit someone as soft as you.

"i can't believe something as soft as you was given to me from such a hard world."

i'm gonna make it better, baby. i'm gonna build a new world for you. one that doesn't try to hurt us. until i can achieve that goal, i hope my embrace can act as your sanctuary.

#🥡.takeout #gojo #gojo angst #gojo x reader #gojo satoru x reader #gojo satoru #jjk gojo #gojo saturo #gojo x you #gojo x y/n #gojo satoru x you #gojo fluff #satoru x reader #jujutsu kaisen satoru #jjk fanfic #jjk x reader

[angelstate]

“Unprioritized Love”

Husband!Price x Wife!Reader

Price is a loyal person, he thinks about everyone else before himself and doesn’t hesitate to do something he normally would be against if it means saving the people he cares for, it truly is a blessing at times, the way his priorities don’t falter…until they do.

because he is a loyal person but does not know or pretends not to know in which situations he should stand by one person instead of the other, it’s conflicting for him to choose someone when another person is also expecting his support.

it hurts a lot when you’re caught in that sort of situation with him, you’re his lover, his companion in life, and the person he returns home to, but you’re also the person he leaves behind for his team, you’re the one who waits around for him while the team gets him almost all the time.

and you know jealousy isn’t healthy, that you shouldn’t resent anyone because it's his job, he has to leave to provide for you, you cannot bite the hand that feeds you, it would be wrong, it wouldn’t be pretty, it wouldn’t be fair for him.

so you bite your tongue and nod like a child when he tells you about his job, about him going away once more, for longer this time. and the tears in your eyes are hard to be held back, because God, it hurts a lot to be left behind, all by yourself. away from your family and your lover, only an empty home to satisfy your basic needs.

He doesn’t mean to be an absent presence, the lack of a lover in your life. He truly doesn’t mean to give so little to you, to not hold you every night. but between his job and you…he knows which one he isn’t choosing even if he doesn’t say it out loud. 

“I'll be back when I can, alright?” he speaks, voice gruff as he looks around the room, his hands on his hips, you stay seated on the couch, knees close to your chest and your eyes glued to the TV for a distraction, is better to pretend you don’t care than to show him how much you are beginning to hate the dynamic he created in your life.

“mhm” you hum in agreement, taking a big breath and holding it in before exhaling through your nose, not trusting that if you open your mouth, a sob wouldn’t escape, Price notices the lack of words from your part, you always have something to say, a small joke to make about him better bringing you a souvenir or something from his “trip” but when this time you don’t speak or even dare to look at him makes him anxious.

“Want me to bring you something?” he asks, taking a few steps towards you, looking towards the TV, a baking program playing, and your focus on the show makes him raise an eyebrow, you aren’t one to enjoy cooking so he doesn't understand why you’re watching it. 

“no thanks” you respond, and the answer makes him feel like he’s done something wrong that made you upset, the last 4 days he’s been home replaying in his mind, trying to remember what could’ve made you get angry with him, nothing comes to mind sadly, and he feels clueless about everything surrounding you. 

“I thought you don’t like cooking” He decides to comment, shifting the conversation to something more banal and easy to speak about. “I started baking almost 8 months ago” you answer him back, voice flat and your eyes strained on the TV, the recipe to make pavlova having your main focus, it makes Price frustrated, how you won’t look at him, won’t give him the time of day when he’s leaving tomorrow.

you don’t expect him to know how your life develops and the things that change when he's away most of the time, it wouldn’t be fair to expect him to pay you attention when he already has a tough and complicated job to do, his salary pays for the kitchen supplies and food after all. it wouldn’t be fair to expect him to know you... god, how stupid is that?

“You didn’t tell me” Price states, his voice carrying a heaviness that reveals he is irritated about not being told something he should’ve known if he paid attention to the new things in the kitchen like the stand mixer next to the electric oven. 

“I thought I mentioned it when I gave you to try the brownies I made yesterday” you retort, your eyes landing on him for a second before returning to the TV, your gaze isn’t welcoming or warm and it creates a pit on his stomach to see you so detached and unresponsive to something he knew should make you upset.

It brings a sort of heaviness to his chest as he notices he doesn’t have the right to feel offended about not being told something when you should be upset about him not noticing in the first place something that occurred in his own home. It is hypocritical and he knows it.

Price stays silent for a long time, the sound of the TV filling in the silence that was created between the two of you, he feels out of place, not knowing how to answer you, what to do, what is the problem he feels he should be fixing right now.

“you should start packing” you comment after almost five minutes, and that phrase is said with a monotone tone, not one of sadness or a little bit of frustration that he’s leaving again, it's a tone that just states the obvious, you declare that he should pack his bag once more because otherwise he would leave with nothing for his mission and that wouldn’t be optimal.

“Can you help me pack?” He asks for a favor you often offer without him mentioning wanting your help. tonight you don’t offer assistance, almost like you aren’t faced by his departure, used to his absence, used to his side of the bed being empty.

“I’m watching TV” you speak and his heart breaks a little bit, you don’t sound apologetic as you often do when you’re not able to help him, and he’s leaving but he feels you left instead, that the girl he married is no longer in the house even though he has you in front of him, too focused on looking at the tv to help him.

he nods at your answer and doesn’t try to persuade you into doing something you don’t want to, it wouldn’t be fair to force you to help him just because he wants you to, it isn’t fair for you to give a hand and for him to take your arm. Loving someone isn’t really fair.

Only when he leaves the living room to go pack do your tears make their way out of your eyes, running down your cheeks as you cry silently, vision too blurry to even distinguish the images on the TV, it feels almost pathetic to be crying alone, your lover packing to leave and not be able to bring yourself to help him abandon you once again.

If you were his pet it would be abuse for him to just leave, but you're a woman and therefore being alone and left behind isn’t unexpected, being the one to stay home is almost an obligation when your lover leaves to provide for you even if you wish they stayed.

you’re not sure how it begins to be fair to be put in this situation, when the missions of 4 weeks turned into 4 months. When knowing everything about each other turned into barely remembering anniversaries and birthdays.

You don’t want to say the relationship fell apart because you doubt there’s anything at all to be destroyed anymore, you love him though, the pain in your chest and the tears falling from your eyes are proof of that, but you are not sure John loves you.

It’s uncertain how he views you after not spending time together for almost two years, you doubt there is nothing more than just an acknowledgment of your existence in his life, a statement that he knows you're his partner but not enough love to call you his lover.

“Why are you crying darling?” the sudden voice of Price pulls you out of your thoughts, the place next to you on the couch sinking as he takes a sit beside you, resting his elbows on his knees while his eyes examine your expression, you look utterly distraught about something, your breathing uneven and shaky as you begin to sob loudly, unable to talk as all your emotions came crashing down.

and the sight of you crying, digging your nails into your thighs, and being desperate for a peace that will not come, makes a heavy feeling of guilt and worry sit on his shoulders, wrapping an arm around your waist and another under your knees, bringing you into his lap and putting your face on the crook of his neck while you cried, sobs muffled against his skin, your tears wetting his shirt.

“take a deep breath love” Price says in your ear, your breathing so erratic that it makes him worried you will suffocate at some point because of the lack of oxygen in your body, he feels your chest against him as you do as he told you, taking deep breaths the best you can, trying to calm down for your and his sake.

you’ve never been one to cry with so much despair, to need his comfort in times of need because you managed well on your own, he was never around to solve your sorrow either so why bother? But today, he is the reason you're crying and it seems fair that he is the one to comfort you, that your only chore is to cry and keep your breathing somewhat stable while he does everything else to fix what he broke.

He doesn't know where to begin though, unaware of where he stands or what he should do to bring peace into your mind, what words will fix his mistake, and what words will tear you apart even more, he doesn’t want to cause you harm, not consciously, not right now. it wouldn’t be fair to you, it wouldn’t be fair to your heart, it would be cruel. and he doesn’t want to be cruel to you, not anymore.

“I’m sorry love…I should’ve been good to you” he whispers, kissing the top of your head, rocking you back and forth on his lap, soothing you like he would to a child, his voice low and soft, his hand caressing your thighs in a comforting manner. 

“I don’t know why I didn’t notice that you started baking, it was wrong, I didn’t notice you when I should’ve noticed every change you’ve had over the last two years” he continuous, speaking out the guilt he carried in his chest the moment he saw you and heard you break down into tears, your sobs engraved in his mind.

“I’m really sorry for missing out on all of this when I was gone, I shouldn’t have been such a bad husband, you don’t deserve that” he sighs, his eyes stinting a little bit from the tears beginning to form, and your calmer now, sniffling and whimpering, the tears slowly stopping, but it seems that your distraught was transferred to him because he doesn’t feel at ease, he feels the guilt eat him alive while he soothes you.

“I don't want you to leave…” you mumble, adjusting on his lap, your head resting against his chest, you have never wanted him to leave home, to go on missions for months on end with little to no contact with your lover, it feels like you're mourning him every time he goes away and doesn’t give you a small message to let you know he wasn’t killed.

“I know sweet girl” he replies, he doesn’t want to leave either, he never wants to, even though he continues to do so. It's a complicated situation, one he doesn’t dare to think about too much because he’ll end up ripping his heart out, his loyalty not being able to distribute equally for you and his team, always the latter winning even if he doesn’t dare to admit it.

he wants to promise you he’ll return quickly this time and will take a leave just to spend time with you, to dedicate more time to what's left of your relationship, he doesn’t want your marriage to fail, you’re the only woman he wants, the only one he had ever seen himself grow old together, he doesn’t want to let that go because of his own stupid and selfish mistakes.

He has to leave tomorrow, but when he’s back he’ll fix everything.

“I'll be back soon” he mumbles against your hair, face buried in it as breathes in your smell, trying to engrave it in his mind, to not forget this time details about you he has always loved. 

Thankfully, his promise becomes reality, and after two weeks of loneliness that have never felt heavier on your chest, he returns, a bouquet of flowers in his hand and a smile on his lips, happy to see you, to see the warmth and loving gaze you always give him back in your eyes after all this time.

He steps through the door, your face pressed against his chest, refusing to let go of him, fearing he would leave even if it wasn’t unreasonable, he had returned early for you, he had seen his mistakes and was fixing what never should’ve been broken

Peace is restored in your home, love is flourishing once again in your marriage, and whatever plans you had made to start over get discarded, you’re already having a fresh start, one that doesn’t involve leaving your lover. this time is a start with a more conscious man who is ready to do everything right by you, to never let his job affect the way he loves you. He's learning that his wife comes first, that his life outside of the military also has the same and more importance than his job.

(little reminder: I'm taking requests if you want me to write something specific xx)

#angelstate #call of duty #angst #cod mw2 #cod x reader #cod modern warfare #cod mw3 #fanfic #call of duty x reader #cod men #captain price x female reader #captain price #john price #captain john price #price cod #cod price #price mw2 #captain price x y/n #captain price x you #captain price x reader #john price x reader #john price x you #john price x y/n #john price cod #husband!price #wife!reader

[toruslvt]

⋆ BEING WELT’S STRESS RELIEF

mdni. + f!reader, mating press, creampie.

Welt has been part of a countless number of adventures, whether it was just gathering some material or sealing Stellarons.

but even though he was an expert in expeditions and even enjoyed a few of them, his favorite moment of an adventure was returning to the astral express and to your arms; or more like, between your thighs.

he never showed it, but he was exhausted, longing for the warmth of your pussy to ease his frustration and tiredness.

“you’re so beautiful, my darling” is what he always mumbles, voice hoarse and eyes glossy while bullying the tip of his cock into your slicked hole, thighs bent over your own chest to give him better access to where he needs you the most.

regardless of your attempt in stretching yourself beforehand, with Welt’s text of “we will return soon” bright on your phone screen and two fingers buried in your cunt, taking him was never an easy chore.

“Welt, it’s too much” you squirm, getting a soft pinch on the side of your thighs as a warning.

the beg for a break fell on deaf ears and instead, large hands cup the back of your soft thighs with big thumbs spreading out your lower lips, mesmerized by the slight struggle of your pussy trying to take him whole, “just a little more” Welt grunts, angling his hips enough for the rest of his girth to fit inside you.

and gods if he tries so hard not to ravage you as soon as he’s balls deep into your cunt, heavy pants, sweat dripping down his bare chest and back with a soft shiver at the same time you clench around his length, barely moving in tiny thrusts as to savor the warmth and wetness or your tiny pussy.

“you’re doing so well” Welt praises in a groan, pressing his mouth against yours as to swallow the squeal that left you with the sudden change of angle and his cock almost pushing against your cervix.

the sound of skin slapping is almost immediate when a “please, move” leaves your mouth, adding a recognizable squelch that makes your ears burn in embarrassment at the idea of someone from the astral express hearing you both.

although you’re most certainly many of your traveling companions are aware of the treatment you give Welt after each mission, since your brain decided to shut down when his thumb found your clit, collecting slick and using it to rub tight circles on it until you cream around his length, and then he’s fucking you without mercy, practically bouncing you both on his bed mattress.

you sob back, biting down a choked scream, “so close...!” breathing heavy with Welt’s stronger body pushing you down further into the bed, earning a grunt and nibble on your sweat coated neck, toes curling as his pace went harder, deeper. all the air inside your lungs escaping in a scream as you came so hard your vision turned blurry, Welt following shortly after and emptying his balls inside your sobbing cunt.

“well done, my love” you thought you heard as you found yourself drifting away to sleep, followed by two heavy knocks on the wall, but you will worry about that tomorrow.

#𐔌᭥ᩙ༉ #this a repost #hsr welt x reader #welt yang smut #welt yang x reader #welt yang #welt smut #hsr smut #hsr x reader #honkai star rail smut

[pizzapizzadickz]

.

#diary #personal #drugs tw #i. am like. borderline about to breakdown. i like. couldnt tell till like 5 mins ago. #like yeah i knew i was feeling tired and shit. but i didnt know i was feeling this bad... #idk. if stuff gets too hard. ill probably have to get high? like. i might not. but. im not sure how ill function tomorrow if i dont? #idk. im not super bad but i can tell im like. about to get locked and ill have to fall asleep that way. #idk im about ready to curl into a ball and die. i wanna scream. i wann flail and hit myself #self harm #i wanna cry. i feel like. i dont even know. #like. im. idk. i just. idk. AHHH THIS IS DISTRESSING ME MORE PUTTING THINGS INTO WORDS SO IMMA STOP FUCK #Seriously tho why cant i tell when i am getting upset. itd be very helpful to know like. 30 mins in advance at least. #LIKE IM NOT TRYING TO IGNORE IT I JUST DONT NOTICE HOW BAD IT IS ACTUALLY. #...at least im not in the garage rn working.... cuz i always breakdown big there. #last time i did i was sobbing and hitting myself. the works really? #idk. i should be okay tomorrow. or today if i get high. ill just have to see if im gettimg better staying the same or getting worse. #haaah. im so tired. i dont wanna wake up or bother with anything tomorrow

[rafeandonlyrafe]

bound and bruised

words: 1.5k

warnings: 18+ only, NONCON!!!!, r*pe, male receiving oral, choking, p in v sex, unwilling sex, kidnapping, blacking out, loss of virginity, dead dove do not eat (PLEASE heed the warnings)

“stop fucking screaming.” rafe grunts out as you look up at him with tear stained cheeks.

“my knees!” you sob out. only moments ago rafe had shoved you down, bruising and scraping your knees against the rough flooring. you're sure they're going to be bruised by tomorrow.

“i don't care, bitch.” rafe says, gently slapping you on the cheek, more of a pat to get your attention back on him.

“you're being so mean.” you try to stand up, but rafes rough hand on your shoulder pushes you back down.

“stop trying to get away. you know you can't outrun me so you might as well just do as i say.”

“and what is it you want me to do?” you cross your arms as you glare up at rafe.

“easy.” he huffs out. “you're going to suck my dick.”

“your- your what?” you squeal, eyes widening when rafe reaches to his shorts, swiftly undoing the zipper and button, pulling the two sides of the flap open, but not pushing them down his hips yet.

“you heard me.” rafe smirks down at you, at the look on your face, one of confusion, verging on terror. “now im gonna take my dick out. and you're going to lick it.”

you try one more time to stand up, to flee and get away, but rafe is too strong, easily keeping you on your knees with one hand while the other frees himself from the confines of his clothes, kicking his shorts off before the underwear are also tugged down.

your eyes widen when you come face to face with rafes cock, hard and standing away from his body, much bigger than you could have imagined, but it fits his tall frame.

“i don't want to do this, rafe.” you whine. you've never sucked dick before, and you certainly don't want your first time to be with a guy you barely talk to.

“too bad. now lick it, it's for your own good.”

“what does that mean?” you question, but rafe doesn't respond, moving his hand to grip the hair at the back of your head as he pushes you forward.

your nose bumps his cock as you try to swivel your head out of the way, replaying rafes words in your head. 

you stick your tongue out, taking a cautious lick against his length. you make a face, spitting onto the ground. “this is gross, rafe!”

“you have about five seconds to start licking before i just shove my whole cock down your throat. go.”

you know rafes threat isn't an idle one, so you push away the oddly salty taste as you begin to lick, focusing just on the mid shaft, ignoring the pulsing head of his cock for as long as you can.

“put it in your mouth, come on. you gotta get it real wet.” rafe encourages you.

“for what?”

“suck me first and then you'll find out.” rafe says, guiding your head to the head of his cock.

you part your lips, placing them around the head of his cock, feeling the weight against your tongue as you suck slightly, not sure what you're supposed to be doing.

“shit- that's good. just be careful for your teeth. if you bite me, you'll regret it.”

you have no plans of biting rafe as your tongue flicks over his slit, finding the taste slightly more bearable now that you've gotten used to it.

“that's it, good girl.” rafe says, even though the only reason you take more of his cock in your mouth is his hand pushing your head down.

“cover it in spit baby, you'll be grateful when i fuck you.”

your eyes widen and you try to pull off. no way you're letting rafe fuck you and losing your virginity like this.

“oh, no you don't.” rafe warns, pushing his hips forward to bury his cock down your throat as you gag aggressively around him, more tears pooling down your cheeks.

rafe pulls you off after a moment as you sputter, coughing aggressively to get the tickle out of your throat.

“get up. im gonna fuck you now.”

“no!” you squeal. you really should know better by now. should just lay back and let rafe do whatever he wishes, but you still fight him and try to get away.

rafe tugs you up by your hair, your scalp burning as he pushes you against the daybed, warm from the sun shining down on it, comfortable and soft in sharp contrast to how rafe is treating you.

“now let's see if you got my dick wet enough for this not to hurt.” rafe makes quick and easy work of your clothing, flipping the bottom of your dress up and literally tearing away your underwear as you cry out, skin burning from the fabric.

“it'll be better for you if you relax.” rafe says, spreading your legs open for him, looking down at both your holes as your ass spreads for him, but even he isn't going to take it that far as his cock presses against your pussy.

you're not wet in the slightest, and despite the spit, it still burns as rafe pushes inside as you cry out, gripping onto the daybed, grabbing a pillow and tossing it back at rafe, who easily swats it away.

“don't piss me off or i wont give you any time to adjust.” he warns.

you manage to relax slightly, enough for rafe to push all the way inside as he sits for a moment with his cock buried in your cunt, the virginity you were planning on losing on your wedding night now ripped away from you.

“shit, you're fucking tight.” rafe moans. “next time i fuck you ill get you wet too. i bet if i lick your pussy you'll get soaked for me.”,

“you're not gonna fuck me again.” you growl out.

“i will. i own you now. your pussy is mine, baby.” rafe makes his point by pulling out then pushing his cock in with a hard, punishing thrust.

your defiant words are lost on your tongue as he moves, thrusting into you with a tight hold on your hips, keeping your ass in the air.

rafes moans and growls are loud and unafraid of the neighbors hearing, like him fucking a girl on his back patio is a regular enough occurance for them to not look.

you try to keep breathing, try to keep your cunt relaxed as his cock pushes in and out, your wetness slowly increasing from the stimulation.

“you like this, huh?” rafe smirks, hands moving to grip your ass, leaving red marks from his fingers as he squeezes at your plump flesh.

“it-it feels good.” you admit with shame, red flaring over your cheeks. no point in lying when rafe can literally feel the way your body is responding.

“and i haven't even touched your clit yet.” rafe chuckles. “you'll gush, baby.”

despite his words, rafe makes no movement for your clit. right now isn't about your pleasure as he pulls your body back onto his cock to meet his already hard thrusts.

“don't… don't cum inside of me. please.” you plead out, chest rubbing against the daybed as he moves you, nipples hard even through the multiple layers of fabric and padded bra.

“where should i cum then?”

“anywhere. my ass, my mouth-”

“ill go for mouth. but get on birth control because im gonna flood your pussy next time.” rafe continues thrusting until you feel his cock swell inside of you.

he pulls out suddenly, flipping you over onto your back. you only have a second to take a quick breath before rafe is kneeling over you, shoving his cock between your lips as his hand strokes his base.

the second your lips close around his head, he's cumming, filling your mouth with the salty taste as you swallow it down, somehow seeming more pleasing than trying to spit it all out.

“that's a good girl.” rafe pats your cheek before turning to splay out next to you on the day bed as your chest heaves, pussy feeling stretched and sensitive.

“you wanna cum?” rafe asks. “i can rub your clit.”

“i don't want you to touch me ever again.” you say, adrenaline wearing off as tears form in your eyes once again.

“i wish you wouldn't say that type of thing, baby.” rafe frowns, reaching over to wrap his strong hand around your neck. your body flails as you try to hold onto the last bit of oxygen, but ultimately you give out, vision going black.

you wake up much later. you're not sure how long, but it's been multiple hours, your throat is dry from lack of water and rafe choking you until you blacked out.

“see what happens if you misbehave?” rafe asks as your head snaps to look at him, not even realizing he was in the room.

you look down at your wrist, handcuff wrapped around it, connected to a chain, which is secured to the very bed you're sitting on.

“now.” rafe smiles wickedly, moving to the edge of the bed. “about touching your clit…”

#dddne #dead dove fic #dead dove do not eat #rafe smut #rafe cameron smut #obx smut #outer banks smut #tw noncon #rafe fic #rafe fanfic #rafe fanfiction #rafe cameron fic #rafe cameron fanfic #rafe cameron fanfiction #rafe x you #rafe x y/n #rafe x oc #rafe x reader #rafe cameron x you #rafe cameron x y/n #rafe cameron x oc #rafe cameron x reader #rafe imagine #rafe one shot #rafe blurb #rafe drabble #rafe cameron imagine #rafe cameron blurb #rafe cameron drabble #rafe cameron one shot

[yandere-daydreams]

Title: Predetermined.

Written for the very lovely @mars-syndrome.

Pairing: Yandere!Azul x Reader (Twisted Wonderland).

Word Count: 3.0k.

TW: AFAB!Reader, Non///Con, Tentacle Sex, Unprotected Sex, Nonconsensual Drug Use, Implied Long-Term Stalking, and Unhealthy Relationships.

For everyone except you, the Monsto Lounge closed at ten.

It was an unofficial rule. Octavinelle freshmen would try to turn you away, but it was a mistake the Leech twins made sure to correct by the next morning, and everyone who’d ever worked more than a shift at the lounge knew better than to kick you out at the end of the night. That was why you were allowed to get away with something Azul would usually blacklist a customer for – staying balled up in the corner of a booth until midnight, your attention either on your nearly-dead phone or the untouched milkshake Floyd had wordlessly put in front of you when he came down to make one for himself, like a zookeeper offering a pound of meat to a caged animal. Riddle was absolutely going to kill you for staying out after curfew, but you couldn’t bring yourself to care about how many sugar cubes you’d have to add to your lemonade tomorrow or how many roses you’d have to paint. You were tempted to spend the night here, to beg Azul to let you use one of the unoccupied rooms and just sleep your misery away, but you’d end up collared for the next week if you didn’t come back at all. The price of being in the best dorm in NRC – you were at the mercy of the strictest dorm leader on campus.

Sometimes, when you couldn’t help yourself, you wished you’d been placed in Azul’s dorm instead. He’d let you get away with anything.

 With a heavy sigh, you pulled your legs into your chest and buried your face in your knees. You felt the bench shift under someone else’s weight and raised your head just enough to see Azul sitting in front of you. He’d already discarded his jacket and scarf, his glasses propped low on the nose of his bridge and his shirt more unbuttoned than he usually cared to keep it. He’d probably just wrapped up his own work for the night. You thought you remembered him mentioning a study guide, but it was hard to tell with Azul. He always had something up his sleeve – it was hard to keep track of which scheme he was on, today.

Silently, he slid a mug of something dark and murky in front of you, steam still rising from the top. Although Floyd’s offering went neglected, you took Azul’s up without protest, letting the warmth seep into your hands. You’d been through this a thousand times. You knew better than to ignore his little remedies, by now.

After you’d taken a healthy sip, he spoke. “Who is it now?”

“Muscle-tee guy, from Savanaclaw.” You groaned, shutting your eyes. “He promised we’d be exclusive, but apparently, he thought that included his roommate, and a girl from Pomefiore, and some idiot from Royal Swords. A boy from his class had to tell me – he had pictures and everything.”

Azul offered a skeptical look. “You’re crying over him?”

“I’m not crying!” You hadn’t cried over anyone since middle school. He should know that – he’d been there then, too, to watch you sob your eyes out when your newest crush tore up your confession letter before so much as opening it. You were a third-year, now. If you were going to cry, you were going to do it alone in your closet where no one would be able to judge you.

You were more tired than anything. You could already feel today starting to weigh on you, your shoulders held at an odd slant and your remaining energy dwindling further by the second. Reluctantly, you uncurled, letting your legs fall over Azul’s lap and taking another drink before going on. “I’m just so exhausted. It feels like it always ends like this. I let my guard down, meet a guy I really like, get him to really like me, and then I find out that that he’s an asshole and somehow, I’m the only one who didn’t know.” You groaned, shaking your head. “I don’t know how this keeps happening. Are all men this bad, or just the ones I choose to date?”

“Unfortunately, your taste is the only common factor.” You let out a dry laugh, shooting Azul a narrow glare. He only shrugged, as composed and as disinterested as always. “Honestly, it’s your own fault. How can you expect to find a quality product when you’re latching onto items you’ve only known for a few days?”

Another groan, this one louder than the first.  You really were tired – it was a struggle just to keep your eyes open. “I don’t sulk in your restaurant ‘cause I want to be lectured, y’know.”

“And I didn’t open a restaurant because I wanted people with pathetic love-lives to sulk in it.” It was his turn to sigh, now, to settle closer to you. A hand came to rest on your back, rubbing small circles into the space between your shoulder blades. He was never especially touchy – you’d caught him cringing after shaking hands with a business partner or being nudged by another clumsy student in an overcrowded hallway more than once – but you could tell he tried to an exception, for you. You appreciated the effort, no matter how much it apparently hurt him. “I know you don’t want to hear it, but it wouldn’t hurt you if stopped rushing into relationships with people you barely know. Taking your time might save you a little heartache.” He paused. You weren’t looking at him, but you could picture the thin frown playing over his lips, the way his eyes narrowed in concentration rather than anger (because when Azul was angry, hr only ever smiled). He was smart, but predictable. Maybe it was just because of how long you’d known each other, how long you’d spent standing at Azul’s side while he looked down on everyone else, but either way, you could read him like the back of your hand. You didn’t have to see him to know exactly what he was thinking. “Or, if you really have to rush into something, you could try starting a relationship with someone you actually know. It might not be as much fun, but it couldn’t be worse than—” He gestured to you, your hunched posture, your wrinkled uniform. “—this.”

You perked up, letting out an airy laugh. It was rare for Azul to hand out advice without asking for a healthy fee, so you tried to nod, to smile, to look like you weren’t on the verge of passing out and forcing him to carry you back to your dorm. “I… I’ll think about it. I’ll try.” And you would. You’d try, at least, like you always did when Azul pulled you aside and told you to stop embarrassing him with your week-long flings. “If I wait long enough, I might even be able to find someone like you, Azul.”

There was a long, silent lapse.

Then, Azul’s hand fell to the small of his back, and you felt your strength snap and give out. You thought, distantly, about batting his hand away, about teasing him for how uncharacteristically affectionate he was being tonight, but you just couldn’t seem to make yourself move, to keep yourself upright. You felt your body slump against Azul’s side, and without missing a beat, he caught you, wrapping an arm around your waist and letting out a shallow sigh.

“Right,” he muttered, as your eyes finally fell shut. You felt like you’d been hollowed out, sapped of something warm and vital and left to gently float into an unwelcome unconsciousness. You tried to scream, but your mouth wouldn’t open, your lips sealed and your tongue useless. You tried to wake up, but that only seemed to drag you down farther, to pull you that much deeper into that awful, exhausting fog.

“Maybe one day, love.”

~

You woke up to the feeling of something inside of you and cold water lapping against your skin.

In your drugged daze, the latter somehow seemed to take priority over the former. It wasn’t just cold, it was freezing, worse than the Coral Sea in the dead of winter, when the ice drifts blotted out the sun and a stray current alone could send you into hypothermic shock. It only came up to your waist, but you felt the chill run up your spine, spreading through your veins and turning your blood to ice. If you’d been able to move, you would’ve been shivering. If you’d been able to think clearly, you would’ve been more afraid.

But you could move, even if you couldn’t think. You managed to lift your hand, bringing it into your line of sight only to find a slick, pitch-black tentacle wrapped around your end, its suckers latched onto your skin and its dull point tangled around your fingers. You recognized it in an instant – Azul’s, down to the lilac-grey underside and the permeant compression marks etched into the tip, earned through countless hours of writing up contracts. You hadn’t him in his true form since you enrolled in NRC. You wondered what would be important enough for him to break his streak now.

Another wave of frigid water broke against your midriff, and you felt something quirk inside of you. It was a tight, bad feeling – a string of tension wound tight enough to coil in on itself, to ache and throb as your cunt stretched around something thick and awful and a soft, blunt head rubbed and flicked against your inner walls. Wait, that was right – something was inside of you, thrusting as it curled and twisted and thrashed. You felt it curve in on itself, the base rising to grind against your clit as it moved, and you bolted upward, taking a gasping breath. It didn’t stop you. The tentacles wrapped around both your wrists and draped over your legs weighed you down but offered no resistance as you straighten your back, as you panted and blinked and ran your hand over your stomach, half-expecting to feel a bump where it was stabbing into you. You didn’t find what you were looking for, though, or maybe you did, you couldn’t tell, your attention already moving on to the wading pool you were laying in, shallow but wide and full enough for the water to spill over the sides, and then the thing on top of you, your eyes eventually land on–

On Azul.

Azul.

Your mouth fell open, a plea for him to help you dying in your throat. He looked as strung-out as you felt; his hair pushed away from his face, giving you a perfect view of his half-lidded eyes, his parted lips, the dark blush painted across his cheeks. His hands were braced on either side of you, edging too near to your hips for comfort, and you were suddenly aware of just how close he was to you, his chest a breath from pressing into yours. Even that distance was a temporary luxury, gone as soon as your eyes met and he let out a hitched groan, falling forward until his face was buried in your neck and you couldn’t so much as imagine getting away from him.

Your hands flew to his shoulders, your legs thrashing weakly as you attempted to push him away, but now, now he chose to restrain you, his spare arms dragging yours down until they were pinned to your sides. Your legs were caught up in his tentacles, too; a pair wrapping around your thighs and spreading them apart, dragging you deeper into the water and leaving you unable to hold yourself up. His breath was as cold as the water, fanning over your skin and making the heat beginning to drip down the inside of your thighs that much more unbearable. You heard him whine, the noise pitchy and desperate, going on for seconds before he seemed to find the will to actually speak. You weren’t sure which would’ve been worse – hearing his voice in a place like this, or watching him abuse your body without so much as an apology.

“You’re tight.” There was a stilted inhale, a trembling groan. “I— Fuck, I knew you would be, but it’s like your body’s been waiting for this as long as I have. It’s like—” His voice gave out, a manic smile pulling at the corners of his mouth. “It’s like we were made for each other.”

He sounded so happy. You couldn’t remember the last time you’d seen him excited about something other than schemes and contracts and profit margins measured down to the last stray cent. Usually, the closest you got was a sense of smug condescension – a certain light in his eyes and a manic zeal in his grin. This was different. This was so, so much worse.

You felt his mouth latch onto your throat, pointed teeth nipping at the skin just above your jugular before burrowing into you, drawing enough blood to drip down your chest and tint the water pink. He wasn’t satisfied with a single mark, either; his attention falling lower, to the curve of your shoulder, then the vulnerable flesh just above your collarbone. As his concentration wavered, you were allowed to slump forward, but yet another tentacle found its way to your neck, wrapping loosely around your throat, applying just enough pressure to keep you upright. It reminded you of how Azul would correct your posture when he caught you hunching over your desk, or how he’d tell you to stand just a little closer to his side while he was talking to the other dorm leaders, to sit next to him rather than across the room while he was meeting with a student who spared anything more than a stray glance in your direction. He’d never been afraid to pose you. This was just an extension of that, really – a more honest version of the same bad habit.

The rough underside of the tentacle inside of you rubbed against the walls of your pussy, and you imagined digging your nails into his cheek, clawing at his eyes, kicking and thrashing and yelling until someone heard you, until Azul decided the risk wasn’t worth the reward, but you couldn’t bring yourself to so much as attempt to move, to fight against his bondage. It was all you could do to watch him from a distance, to force yourself to be vaguely aware of what he was doing to you. The tentacle inside of you fell into a steady rhythm, and Azul’s hand fell to your clit, clumsily circling the hypersensitive bundle of nerves. His inexperience was apparent, his usual air of confidence discarded in favor of seeking his pleasure and forcing the same misplaced bliss onto you. You didn’t resist, but you jerked away from his touch. If he noticed that you were trying to get away from him, though, if he could see your pained expression or grit teeth, he didn’t seem to care, to think of it as anything other than you bucking into his hand. He tilted his head back, his pale eyes flickering towards your face, a wide smile plastering itself across his lips. Slowly, joltingly, he pulled himself back to your height and before you could brace yourself, his lips were crashing into yours. Teeth scraped against teeth, his tongue pressed into yours, and you thought, through the daze, that this might’ve been his first kiss. You couldn’t remember him mentioning anything, ever telling you about a pretty girl or cute boy who’d caught his eye. In fact, you couldn’t remember him ever mentioning anything about love or romance at all.

Huh.

It made sense, once you took a step back.

You didn’t kiss back. Obviously, you didn’t kiss back. Azul didn’t seem to care. He was panting by the time he pulled away from you, his blush darker and his pupils blown out with lust. You felt the tentacle inside of you twitch, and thought for the first time that it might not be a tentacle at all but something too terrible to name. You were almost thankful when the tentacle around your neck slipped past your lips and forced your teeth apart, giving you something to think about aside from that awful, slick thing inside of you, aside from the revolting heat slowly beginning to curl and flicker in your core. The tapered tip brushed against the back of your throat and you gagged violently, the air hitching in your throat and your body lurching against his. Azul’s grin grew broader, his pace rougher. “You’re going to cum.” It wasn’t an order or a question, just an assessment, an observation. A prediction you could only hope wouldn’t come true. “That’s alright. That’s perfect. I want you to. I’ve waited so long to—”

His voice cut out with an airy groan. He pressed himself closer to you, his stare boring into skin and his lips ghosting over yours. You tried to turn away, to clench your eyes shut, but his hands came up, cupping your face and pulling you back to him. The tentacle assaulting your mouth jutted deeper, forcing you to open your eyes, to meet his. He was crying – you could see the tear tracks running down his cheeks, carving trails across his pale skin. He was smiling, wider than you’d ever seen him smile before.

“I tried to give you a chance.” He was muttering, now, the words barely audible and entirely deafening all at once. “I tried, but this is what you drove me to.” He rested his forehead against yours, drove his nails into your jaw. “This was the only way I could show you that we were made for each other.”

Made for each other. Made for each other.

The conviction in his voice was so steadfast that, maybe, in another scenario, you probably would’ve believed him.

A tight, searing heat washed over you. Your body went rigid, tensing up as your vision burnt white and your cunt clenched around his tentacle. At the same time, something burst open inside of you, filling you with something hot and horrible and so much worse than the water you were still submerged in, the water you wished would’ve drowned you minutes ago. Rather than pull back, you felt Azul draw closer, wind around you tighter, but you didn’t care. You couldn’t.

Going limp, you leaned against the edge of the pool and closed your eyes, letting your mind drift far, far away. Azul let you, his hands falling away but his tentacles persisting with their grinding and groping and invading. It didn’t matter. It was like Azul said – you were made for each other, right?

You could only wonder how long ago he’d decided that.

#yandere #yandere x reader #yandere x you #yandere imagines #yandere twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland masterlist #twisted wonderland imagines #yandere twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland #yandere twst #twst imagines #twst x reader #twst #azul x reader #yandere azul ashengrotto #azul ashengrotto x reader #yanderecore #yancore

[bookishdreamer28]

Giving Gojo the silent treatment

◈━◈━◈━◈━◈━◈━◈━◈━◈━◈━◈━◈

It all started because of a fight you had the previous day. He's been working so hard lately, that the only thing you wanted was to make his day, somehow better by making dinner, having some good time for yourselves, drink wine and many more.

___________________________________________

It was 9 p.m and you had already set the table, with Satoru's and yours fave dinner. You were all dolled up and waiting for your fave boy's arrival.

When you heard the lock on the door, you instantly stood up from the couch and when to greet him. You could already see his small frown on his face and you wanted nothing more but to make it go away right away.

"Satoru my love, welcome ba-"

"Yeah yeah nice to see you too." He stepped back from your hug and walked away. Just walked away.

You knew how hard it was to be a sorcerer, but it wasn't necessary for him to act his way. You tried to brush it off, but the sting was still there. It hurts that he avoided hugging you.

You followed him to your room and saw him getting in the bathroom, ready to take a shower. You sighed and decided to sit on the bed and wait for him.

Once he got out, he didn't say anything to you and went straight to your closet.

He could feel your eyes on him but he still didn't say a thing.

"Uhm, I have dinner ready love. I made our fave! Since I know how much you liked it last time, I thought about making it again and after dinner I have planned an amazing night for ourselves, since I know you've been working s-"

"I don't feel like eating right now. I thing I'm going to bed early after I drink some tea." He said in a monotone voice.

"Really? Oh...but baby I just wanted to make you feel better. I know things are not ok out there but in here I want you feel safe and good-"

"CAN'T YOU JUST STOP TALKING ALREADY? I told you. I'm not in the mood for ANYHTING but sleep." He turned to you looking pissed. You absolutely understood him but the way he spoke to you is definitely Not ok.

"Well you don't need to be such a jerk you know. I just wanted to take care of you and this is how you talk to me?"

"Whem you're being pushy, what do you expect me to do? I had the toughest week ever, I need sleep and I need you to leave me alone." He said raising his voice a bit.

You tried so hard not let tears fall down. It broke your heart knowing that you were basically a burden to him now.

You felt your hands trembling and took a deep breath. Once you closed your eyes, you felt them. Tears were rolling down your cheeks. But you didn't really care.

Satoru didn't notice your tears since he truned away from you, to make tea.

After you calmed a little, you changed to your pajamas and went to collect the food from the table.

You saw satoru watching tv while drinking his tea, and you felt anger rising up again. The fact that he was so chill with all this made you so mad. You had many tough weeks too. You went through so much bullshit too. And you had bad days too. But you never thought, not even once, take it out on Satoru.

You cleaned the table and put the food in the fridge for tomorrow. You felt so exhausted. You went in yours and Satoru's bed, to take a blanket and a pillow, since you pretty sure he doesn't want to sleep with you.

Satoru was washing his mug and he didn't saw you when you went to take your place on the couch. With not more words exchanged, Satoru left the kitchen and went straight to your bedroom.

And without noticing, you started sobbing.

....

The next morning, Satoru woke up and when he saw you weren't next to him, he panicked. He got up alarmed and went in the living room.

"Y/N!? Sweetheart where are y-" when his eyes fell on your curled up figure, he released a breath he felt he was holding for too long. He thought about yesterday and immigrated felt like he wanted the ground to open a wide hole, and swallow him in.

He approached silently and crouched down next to you. He raised his hand and took a small strand of your hair and placed it behind you ear. He kissed yoyr forehead and stayed there for a while. He felt your body stirr and lookedat you carefully. You slowly opened your eyes and when you saw Satoru hovering above you, you frowned.

"Y/N baby, why did you sleep here? Didn't you get cold? Are you feeling cold now? Cause I'm going to make you tea and some breakfast for you to eat baby." He whispered.

You sat a little, rubbing your eyes. And then stood up and left, leaving Satoru there. He watched you walking away till you disappeared in the bathroom. He rubbed hos forehead thinking how much he messed up and cursed himself.

.....

The next morning, Satoru was in the kitchen making breakfast. He was humming your fave song, while making eggs and puring some juice on your glass. The smell woke you up and when you reached the kitchen, you stopped in your tracks. You wanted to smile at the image, but you couldn't forget what happened yesterday. You opened the fridge and grabbed one bottle of water and went back to the couch, grabbing your book with you. He felt his hwart breaking because the onky thing he wanted was to feel your warm body pressed against his. He wanted your kisses. He wanted you, moee than anything else. He looked at you and turned his back to you again, not wanting you to see his tears.

....

"Hey baby, how about we watch this series you talked to me about last week? You said season 2 is out, so I thought about watching it together. I brought snacks, sodas, i have your fave blanket aaand hugs!" He said cheerfully. But when he saw you not paying him any attention, his smiled dropped. You were laughing at a video you were watching. Oh how much he missed this sound. And how much he wished was the one making you laugh like this.

.....

That night, you returned home from a coffee with Shoko and decided to take a shower. After that, you were ready to to watch your fave series on the couch and then go to sleep. Satoru saw you there, and he started walking to you. When you heard his footsteps, you rolled your eyes and pretended to be asleep.

He sat on the floor next to the couch and stared at you with those blue eyes.

"Baby, I-" he felt like his throat was close. He couldn't speak. His voice was hoarse from crying.

You turned your head away, because you couldn't take it seeing him that way. But the fact that he hurted you with his choice of words, was something that made you very upset.

"I'm so so so freaking sorry my love. I messed up so badly and I know saying sorry won't change the fact that I hurt you. But I want you to know that you mean the whole world to me." He voice was shaking his fingers reached to touch you. He needed to feel you so badly.

You looked at him and listened carefully to what he had to say.

Once he saw your eyes beautiful eyes looking at him, he felt so relieved. He missed you so much.

"Please baby, please forgive me. I know I'm in no place to even ask that after the way I spoke to you, but I can't take this anymore. Being this close to uu and not having you pains me. It pains me so damn much." He felt his eyes sting with tears.

You cold expression turned to a sad one, and you felt like hugging him so tight, but you were still unsure of what to do now.

Satoru's head dropped to the floor and he rubbed his eyes trying to not let anymore tears roll down.

"Oh Toru." You whispered. At the sound, Saotru looked at you, woth widen eyes.

"Baby, I- it pained me so much seeing you so upset and cold. Remember when we promised that we will be each other's anchors, and that we'll talk about anything that is bothering us? Well, you didn't do it. You just let your anger speak for you. And it was messed up."

You rested your right hand, on his softly.

"But I love you too. And this will never change. But please, mext time just talk to me ok? Of course there will be days that something will upset us and ruin our moods, but at the end day, all that matters is that we're each other's home." You rubbed his cheek softly, wiping his tears away.

"Can I please hug you?" He asked with a low voice.

"Of course baby." You moved first and he caught you in his arms fast. He felt alive again. And so did you. That was all you needed.

"Now, how about we watch my series and eat something to cheer us up hm?" You asked smiling, and leaned to leave a soft kiss on his lips. When you tried to pull away, he grabbed your face and kissed you more. And harder.

Well now you know that you won't be watching anything.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Here's a new Gojo post caused missed writing something with him!!

Thank you for reading ♡♡

all rights reserved. please do not copy, modify, repost, translate, or claim my content as yours.

#jujutsu kaisen #jjk #anime #gojo satoru #gojo x reader #jjk gojo satoru x reader #gojo satoru x reader #jjk gojo x reader #jujutsu gojo #jjk gojo #jujutsu satoru #jujutsu kaisen satoru #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk satoru #gojo x reader fluff #satoru x reader #gojou satoru x reader #satoru gojo #jjk x reader #jjk x you #jjk x y/n #jujutsu kaisen x you #anime x reader