#this is again more of a self reference for myself lol | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

mestos · 7 months

Text

CoAi moments in DetCo games (part two)

cont from my last post

This time the game I'm going to be covering is The Great Deduction of Three People. In this game you can actually play as Ai! Conan takes a more supporting role while the main case is deducted by Haibara. Unfortunately she doesn't have a sprite in this one (takes a narrator vn approach) but like the other game, there is full voice acting, animated sprites provided by TMS.

worth noting that this game takes place before haibara's development with the detective boys. so she's still cold, standoffish a little and ayumi still refers to her as "haibara-san".

since this is basically Haibara Chapter i'll do extremely brief context summaries per moment since the japanese for the case itself is too complicated for me to understand lol

For Context, the detective boys + hakase go to a glass case model exhibit recreating what edo period architecture and life. theyre at edo town museum, where there is a robbery that had taken place.

the opening cutscene is a cute cutscene—the DB all ride conan's skateboard with him but crash except haibara who was just walking lol. she is the POV you play as. the banter between coai immediately starts with their iconic snark to snark behaviour.

as they go in and observe the exhibits, conan asks her for her opinion

after the case figures are introduced, the kids get to see a glimpse of a super secret exhibit briefly—a scroll. haibara feels strange about it.

conan's voice here is really soft (and concerned).

the burglary happens, and haibara is the only one to notice the changes. seemingly there is nothing wrong with the case, but she has a feeling the real and the fake have been swapped. she freaks out a little, thinking it's related to the b.o

the reason that haibara investigates on her own is because she thinks the B.O have a possibility of being involved (since the case involves some wine references LOL). she seperates from the group to ask the case figures a few questions.

she later notices conan is gone heh. but she decides to press forward, and overhears a conversation between two men. but stuff go south when she's noticed, and guess who saves the his wife?

he saves her from being shot and the criminals run away. they go after them, but a series of events happen and the lose the perp. the dude above gets run over and they have to send him to hospital, but in the event he drops the scroll that was stolen earlier. haibara deciphers the scroll, and it leads her to some place, but its just 1 lead. she wants to go investigate it on her own, but the gang find out and insist on tagging along.

conan and ai very sweetly have this exchange

despite his sprite, his voice is actually so sweet. slightly hushed, gentle and reassuring. it's enough to make haibara cave.

conan helps haibara decipher the map by attaching a modern day map, revealing some clues related to the four asian mythological creatures. genta makes a comparison to food and somehow that sticks because the gang literally just start going on a food tour (its because the locations on the map point to, literally, food stores). conan even lets haibara decide where they go.

"oi haibara, you decide where we go."

the player is actually who decides where they go.

they go to ningyo yaki (a type of wagashi, and it has sponge cake texture with red bean filling).

genta: "ooooo, delicious. i can eat so many bro"

monjayaki:

haibara: "so this is monjayaki... this is the first time i've ever had it"

doujo yaki

genta: "oooh, it's here! let's eat!"

ayumi gets nervous about being served live food, and u can choose to make haibara freak her out here or console her. the LP chose freak her out, and she insists conan eats her share LOL

after all 3 visits you have the option to go back to one of the places. in the background of the monjayaki stop, you can actually see shiratori and sato in the background, which the kids choose to talk to them on while they eat their fourth meal of the day LOL they absolutely get No information other than the fact that they disrupted their lunch but it advances the plot

they do some investigating for three more places. theres a festival, with some suspicious ass looking dudes, and you can choose to just run (and investigate elsewhere) or ignore them. ignoring them advances the plot

anyway a few more shenanigans happens until haibara figures out the map and what the symbols mean (GO QUEEN!!!!!). at some point she gets a gun to her head by the perp (AND IS CRAZY CHILL ABOUT IT) but then conan, genta and mitsuhiko save her lol

they do some more investigating which eventually leads them to a warehouse

"WHOA, IT REALLY WAS THERE!!!!"

after conan gives haibara some context (there has been some robberies in the area), a bunch of steel planks start falling

no one gets hurt, and this is actually the moment haibara says her theory.

if you get it wrong, the culprit gets away. haibara's voice is quiet, almost disappointed in herself, and conan gently says it seems like your deduction was wrong, in a very forgiving and sweet way as if to console her lol. and then you can try again

they use the crane to catch the perp. sato and shiratori and take him away, and alls well ends well. conan and ai have this exchange

despite his sprite, his voice is pretty serious here. worried. concerned <3

since i cant add anymore images, haibara responds with

"well, i can't tell you that if i dont have obvious concrete proof" "especially in front of mr-rushing-headfirst-into-danger...." "eh?"

conan tells haibara that he didn't find anything related to the B.O about the perp that just got arrested, and haibara says she expected that. to add, he sweetly says this

haibara: "wow, coming from mr great detective, that's high praise" haibara: "well, if you ever come across a case you can't solve, you can always consult me" conan: "heh, i wasn't complimenting you that far."

the closing cutscene is sato taking the kids out for dinner, and then calling takagi to help her pay for the amount of food these kids ordered LMFAO

but conan and ai have one final exchange during it

(while takagi is mourning his wallet)

haibara: "well, the cold reality of adult circumstances" conan: (chuckle) "as always, cool and collected. by the way, what was up with you today? you didn't seem yourself." haibara: "hmm? what do you mean, i was the same as usual." conan: "where? you were oddly overbearing and nosy today." haibara: "really? then i must have caught it from a certain someone." conan: "huh? and who is this certain someone?" haibara: "who knows? why don't you think about it and figure it out, mr great detective?" conan: "huh?"

ANYWAY FOR MY CLOSING THOUGHTS

seeing someone haibara solve the mystery and lead conan along is the roleswap au that i need. and this is, in its own way, canon!

#neesan texto #coai musings #this is again more of a self reference for myself lol #i want to redraw some scenes from this game tbh its SO cute #they were VERY precious

9 notes · View notes

aseriesofunfortunatejan · 10 months

Text

Little reminder about the spoon theory, since I referenced it a couple times recently! When I talk about "running out of spoons" this is what I'm referring to, not... literal spoons. (No matter where I live, we always have more *literal* spoons than every other cutlery. I don't even use them that much? I'd say I use forks the most. Where's my freedom of choice in this?)

youtube

In this video, Jessica uses two Sims as an example of how a disabled person may run out of metaphorical spoons from daily activities, while it doesn't even need to be a consideration for the able-bodied Sim. Of course, that's just one example of how to explain it, but who doesn't love Jessica,

#spoon theory #< tagging to find my own post again if needed #i don't really use the spoon theory all that much to refer to myself because i don't currently believe i'm at risk of running out of spoons #in my daily life? at least physically. in regards to mental health i'd have to do some more. self analysing.#but there are specific instances in which i'm operating on limited spoons or run out of spoons faster which is why it comes up #(the issue with using the spoon theory with mental health is that there have been times in my life when i think i started my day on two #spoons and ran out right away lol. don't even wanna think about it)#//#qt as in queue tag #Youtube

0 notes

leighsartworks216 · 7 months

Text

You Have A Type, Don't You?

Astarion x gn!Tav/Reader

Based on this post

I wrote this instead of doing any of the work I need to do! I'm gonna go do that now lol

Warnings: innuendos, minor references to sex, the barest hints of jealousy

Word Count: 1,601

Masterlist

AO3

Tag List Form

Your pencil scratched across the paper, drawing Astarion over and over again on a single page. This wasn’t anything surprising; you drew all of your companions. Gale, Wyll, Karlach, Shadowheart, Lae’zel - they all had pages of their own, but it was usually only one drawing. Some had even posed for it. It was just a way to relax, and their faces always lit up when you showed them, even if they tried not to show it.

Everyone needed a break from fighting and exploring day in day out, so you decided one more day here wouldn’t hurt. As such, you’ve spent the better half of the day just drawing. At first it was little doodles of Scratch, but then you realized you hadn’t drawn the vampire spawn yet.

Most of the expressions you captured came from memory. You’d occasionally sneak a glance for quick reference, pretending to stretch or get distracted by some birds. But at some point, he’d disappeared from camp. You just assumed he’d gone off hunting.

That assumption was proved quite wrong when a voice tsked over your shoulder, almost directly in your ear.

Startling away from the sound, you whipped around to see Astarion crouched down. He wore a self-satisfied smirk and settled down into a full sit on the ground.

“It seems someone is infatuated,” he teased. “So who is it? Someone we saved from peril, perhaps?”

Oh. Right. It had completely slipped your mind.

You cleared your throat as your cheeks warmed and smiled. “Y-Yeah, something like that.”

He chuckled. “Come on, darling, there’s nothing to be shy about. Spare none of the juicy details. What’s he like?”

“He’s, well,” you stammer, “he’s interesting.”

He scoffed. “That’s hardly juicy or a detail. Or is he just another pretty face?” He leaned forward, trying to get a better look at your drawings. You wanted to pull them away and hide them, but why? All the others had drawings done of them, and you loved showing it off when they were done. Why was this any different?

“No, he’s a lot more than that,” you admit quietly. You weren’t good at lying - usually Astarion took the lead any time you had to - but maybe if you didn’t tell a complete lie… “He’s funny, charming. His laugh lights up my world. He’s had a rough go of it, but he doesn’t like it to show.”

“He must like you if you know,” he hummed. Your heart leapt into your throat as he pointed to the pin pricks drawn on the neck. “Is he a vampire, too?” He chuckled, but it sounded strained. “You have a type, don’t you?”

You scoffed even as warmth flooded to your cheeks. “No! I do not have a type.”

“No, of course not,” he played along. “Certainly not for creatures of the night who bite into that pretty little neck of yours.” Despite his smile, there was a tension in his eyes. “I don’t mind, dear. I’d be more than happy to scrounge around some nights so you may indulge your new lover.”

You shook your head. “You don’t have to do that, Astarion,” you assured. “He’s not… We’re not together.”

“No?” You shook your head again. He opened his mouth to give you advice or console you, but you cut him off. It was better to end this fantasy now, before it began to hurt too much.

“It doesn’t matter. Besides, you shouldn’t be sneaking around so you can look over my shoulder. I could have been drawing something terrible.”

He laughed. “All the more reason to risk a peek. You’re so good, it would be nice to know you can be tempted.” Then he scowled. “Unless it’s something terribly dull. You deserve much more than missionary.”

If your cheeks weren’t already blazing hot…

“In any case, I was only wondering when you’d draw my portrait. You seemed more than happy to provide the others with a likeness. And…” He looked past you, seemingly far away. “I haven’t seen myself in two centuries. One gets curious, especially when you’re as vain as me.”

If he heard your heart start racing, he didn’t comment on it. Drawing him would make him realize it wasn’t some other vampire crush you were drawing. But, it had been a while since your adventure began, and you’d drawn everyone else. You swallowed down your anxiety. “Yeah! Of course! Did you wanna pose, or anything?”

He blinked and suddenly he was back in the present. A sly smirk covered up whatever emotions could be lingering on his face. “If your little vampire friend doesn’t get too jealous. I would actually like if you could draw me just,” he paused, “smiling. It would be nice to know what everyone else sees. Make sure I’m not off-putting, you know how it is.”

Once he was sitting comfortably, you turned to a fresh page and began drawing. The paper was hidden from his view, but he watched as your hand, wrist, and arm all moved in tandem like a clock’s gears to create an image. Your eyes moved between the sketch and him multiple times. Sometimes you’d glance up and draw for almost a minute. Then other times you kept going back and forth, constantly checking for reference.

Watching you work was fascinating. All your surroundings faded away. Karlach being her usual loud self, Wyll dancing, Gale cooking, Lae’zel sharpening weapons - nothing could turn your attention from him. He almost felt subconscious with the intensity of it. Your eyes studied him, taking in every single feature, and translated it to your journal. What did you see when you looked at him, he wondered. What did the world see? It had been so long, he couldn’t even remember his face. All he knew was he was attractive.

With a final few marks, brushed away to blend them into the rest, you looked down at your masterpiece. You were so caught up in the drawing you forgot why you were hesitant before, but now that Astarion stared at you from two different angles, your anxiety came back full force. There was no way out of this.

“All done, dear?”

You smiled shakily up at him and turned the journal around. His face scrunched up in confusion. When he met your eyes, he was decidedly unamused. “Darling, if you’re going to draw your fleeting fancy, don’t trick me first. I know it’s hard to see past the depraved bloodlust, but we don’t all look alike, you know.”

“No, Astarion, it’s not- I-”

While you fought to find words, Karlach picked up the slack. Cupping her hands around her mouth, she shouted across the camp, “IT’S YOU, FANGS!”

Dread washed over you. You closed your eyes. If a merciful god was going to kill you and rid you of this embarrassment, now would be the time. A bolt of lightning, perhaps. You’d even welcome decapitation.

You risked a glance when you felt your book being tugged carefully from your hands. His eyes were wide, mouth slightly open as he tried to comprehend what the fuck had just happened. Gods, now he was going to leave camp. You buried your face in your hands. He was going to pack everything up and leave before the sun even touched the horizon. And you’d never see him again. Maybe you’d go find Cazador yourself, just to kill the bastard.

“All these drawings… are me? Darling?”

You inhaled deeply and lowered your hands, but you couldn’t bear looking at him. He could stab you with his dagger and you’d apologize to him for it all. Hell, you’d let him drink you dry if it meant leaving this all behind you. “You’re very pretty,” you admitted quietly. “I didn’t know how to ask, and just- You can rip the pages out, burn them, whatever makes you feel better. And if you leave, I won’t blame you or chase after you or-”

“I’m not upset.” Your head never shot up so fast. “Well, a little. You’re not subtle when you stare, you know. I thought you were just uncomfortable being around a vampire, but this…” He turned back to the portrait you’d just finished. “This is really what I look like?”

You swallowed away a small portion of the shame. At least he wasn’t running away. “As best as I can capture you, anyway. Y-You’ve got these sharp eyes, and your hair curls around your ears, and you get little wrinkles around your eyes and mouth when you laugh - and I just like drawing you.”

The page flipped over again. The page of expressions, capturing everything you described. When he smiled full and bright his fangs were on full display, accented by the laugh lines on either side of his mouth. And the puncture wounds on his neck…

“Ah, so when I said you had a type…” He chuckled, but it didn’t hold as much warmth as usual.

“Your laugh does light up my world,” you admit. His red eyes were on you in an instant, flickering over your whole face. “Just, for the record.”

He glanced at the drawings once more, contemplative. Then, he held the book back out to you. “I wouldn’t be… opposed to trying this. Whatever this is.”

You reached out to take it, but he pulled it away. “But, no more sneaking glances across camp when you want to draw me. I would be delighted to model for you again, in any pose your sweet heart can concoct.” He held the book out again. “Deal?”

You grabbed onto the book, finally relaxing as you smiled. “Deal.”

---

Tag List:

@satelliteapotheosis @hypopxia @mjmygd @flsalazar @thedevilssinner @marina-and-the-memes @softempest @rebeccasship @pinkishredlemonade @faeoran

#fanfic #fanfiction #astarion #astarion x reader #astarion x tav #baldur's gate 3 #baldurs gate 3 #bg3 #baldur's gate astarion #baldur's gate tav #baldurs gate astarion #baldurs gate tav #bg3 astarion #bg3 tav #gn reader #x gn reader #gender neutral reader #x gender neutral reader #fluff

2K notes · View notes

fandomapocalypse · 2 months

Text

Love and relationships in Hazbin Hotel

Episode 7 has something interesting and in the song that is called "Out for love" is sung by a character that is referring to a type of love different from a romantic or sexual one, Carmilla is openly talking about familial love. Vaggie of course relates this to her romantic feelings towards Charlie and how she wants to help her. But something else interesting happens in episode 7, Rosie is properly introduced as Alastor's bestie. This leads to showing another type of love: platonic love.

Now to the main point of this post: Alastor. It's canon that he is aroace and as an ace myself (I'm still questioning whether I'm aromantic or demiromantic but this post isn't about me lol) I'm extremely happy to see myself through him. Plus, the fact that the perfect Tumblr sexyman is aroace is genius and hilarious, you can't possibly top this type of humor.

Alastor for me has been a great ace representation and I've seen myself mainly in how he acts around his friends or other people.

When it comes to Niffty it looks more like a relationship between someone with their feral cat or their crazy little sister. But it's still a genuine connection and a fun chaotic one at that, he even lets her touch his hair and climb on him. In regards to Mimzy, he has shown he cares about her and welcomes her with open arms. He openly hugs her, which shocks everyone in the cast. This is extremely important because Alastor usually only starts physical contact to mock others or to pretend physical closeness as a manipulation tactic (like he often does with Charlie). When it comes to people he hates Alastor may touch them but will quickly wipe his hand on his clothes, like what he did with Lucifer. Personally, I don't like personal contact and only accept it if I start it and usually I use it as a way to show affection with close friends. Also, they have known each other since they were alive, so Mimzy probably knows a lot about Alastor that the rest of the cast doesn't. Mimzy also says that they used to dance together. But that doesn't exclude the fact that she uses Alastor's friendship and affection to save her own ass and taking into account how Husk reacted to Mimzy, this isn't the first time she does this. Also, the relationship between the two starts to crumble after what happened in episode 6 and Mimzy seems to be the kind of friend who will pretend that they are still on good terms and still ask Alastor for favors in the future.

Now jumping back to Alastor's true bestie: Rosie. They probably bonded at first over their cannibalistic natures but it's clear that it evolved beyond that. Personally, I don't ship Alastor with anyone, but when it comes to Rosie I headcanon they are in a QPR.

There are various reasons why this relationship is so great and wholesome, the first one being that there is no power imbalance, they are equals. Both are cannibalistic overlords and are on equal footing in terms of power. When Rosie first sees Alastor she is genuinely happy which is something new because most people react badly to him out of fear or hatred.

Alastor respects Rosie, he even compliments her, in her introduction he says she is "the most darling, delightful, and dangerous Overlord of this side of the pentagram". Considering how self-centered and narcissistic he can be, it means a lot. Alastor would rather die again than compliment another Overlord who isn't Zestial, which he respects but out of fear. Alastor respects Rosie as his close friend. When they stand next to each other they give an air of equals, something that never happens thanks to Alastor's ego and sadism towering over everyone else. With Rosie it's different and Rosie can openly tease Alastor with the "Look at you, so polite! Alastor you can learn a thing or two" when comparing him to Charlie when meeting her, or "I'm just kidding, I know you're an ace in the hole" to tease him about his asexuality. This is something that not a lot of people can do because Alastor is obsessed with control and respect. After all, we see how badly he reacted when Husk insulted him.

He also harmonizes with her, he willingly makes a duet with her in "Ready for this". He isn't interrupting her, instead, he agrees with her and they sing together in unison. This is the first time he doesn't openly hijack a song or fight for control over it, like he did with Vox and Lucifer (although this also happened because this is Charlie's song, but who cares the point still stands). Also, this is the first time we see him dance with someone, instead of forcing them to join his musical number (like he does with Charlie on various occasions). Alastor and Rosie are in perfect sync and it's so wholesome and precious to see him being so openly happy with her. Many have pointed out that the only times Alastor is genuinely smiling is when he is with Rosie and it shows by his expression in his eyes.

Finally, Rosie is the only one capable of bringing the most human emotions out of him, the most obvious one being confusion. In the scene of "ace in the hole" Rosie manages to confuse and surprise Alastor for a solid second, which is a huge change of his persona around everyone else of control and manipulation. Also, it's hilarious that Alastor doesn't know what being aroace is, he probably thinks he is above all that.

He is openly relaxed around Rosie and lets her touch him in an affectionate way, something that not even Mimzy can do. It may be because of the height difference but Mimzy only touches Alastor to hug him and to emphasize he is a "heartless son of a bitch" and Alastor clearly gets irritated by her touching him that way and even moves her finger away from him. This never happens with Rosie and he even welcomes her touching him by not having any walls with her. It's Rosie the one starting the physical contact and Alastor doesn't seem to mind and he never tries to use physical contact to take advantage of her like he does with other characters. Rosie is one of the few people who can touch Alastor without losing an arm and instead have a positive reaction out of him.

The most genuine relationship Alastor has is with Rosie, he even has the confidence and comfort to stop his elegant and reserved persona of not swearing. Which he only does when he is truly angry, like what happened with Lucifer. Or when he is threatening someone like he did with Adam. Or when he is shocked when his microphone breaks. He swears to insult Susan, which is someone they both despise equally. Something that you would only do with your closest bestie.

Finally, let's talk about Alastor's breakdown in the last episode. We've already seen that Alastor is capable of having friendships that aren't based on an end goal. Alastor knows this but he rejects it because he is at the hotel originally for selfish goals and doesn't want his emotions to get in the way. He is terrified of ruining his reputation as a sadistic killer and becoming an altruistic who cares about his friends. Alastor wants to stop himself from starting to care about the crew the same way he cares about Rosie, Mimzy, or Nifty to some degree. This is confirmed by his conversation with Niffty, where he admits he has grown accustomed to the main crew and perhaps he is growing feelings of affection towards them in his own way.

In regards to shipping him with Rosie, I see it as a platonic ship or a QPR. Some people have a headcanon that if they had known each other when they were alive they would have married for tax benefits and to avoid the social stigma, which is the only right answer. When they first met in hell they probably had dates in cannibal town where they ate human flesh while gossiping and trash-talked about the other overlords. Which is exactly what an ace person like myself wants from a close friendship.

As an ace, I really like Alastor not because he is the ultimate Tumblr sexyman or see him as hot but because he is an extremely fun character that I can relate to. I'm grateful for the crew and VA that take into account he is aroace and take seriously that aspect of his character. I don't mind that the aroace representation in Hazbn Hotel is a narcissistic psychopath, if you want a more wholesome ace representation you can check Todd in Bojack Horseman or Saiki in The Disastrous Life of Saiki K.

I don't mind people shipping Alastor, after all, it's just people having fun, but you can't ignore that he is aroace and how this affects his relationships. So yeah have fun and respect and aroace community :)

ok thanks for hearing my rant bye

#hazbin hotel #alastor #rosie #hazbin hotel rosie #asexual #aromantic #aroace #aspec #radiorose

626 notes · View notes

meanbossart · 2 months

Text

Oh boy, VaM is kind of a trial and error experience LOL I couldn't really show you how to use the interface and stuff without a whole video or something, but it's not THAT difficult to get a hang of if you just give yourself a day or two to play around, not to mention the number of tutorials you find out there. Luckily, if you only want to use it as a reference software that makes the process far easier (to this day I have no idea how to animate on that thing, since that's not what I use it for)

As for how I use it, it's pretty self explanatory - if there's a complicated pose I want to draw but I'm either having trouble with it, or just want to double-check angles/anatomy, I will use it as a resource! I use for most of my "proper" pieces (y'know, the nicer looking ones) and every once in a while for my silly comics if I'm having trouble with a pose.

Lets use this drawing for example (the character on top of DU drow belongs to @namespara )

I don't draw a lot of mud-wrestling (shocking, I know) but I had an idea of the kind of pose I wanted them to be in. So the very first thing I did was make a rough sketch of what I was envisioning:

I often do a rough sketch first, even If I know I'm going to be pulling the program up because A) It's less tedious than adjusting the models over and over again until I pick a pose and B) because sometimes I'll decide I don't need the reference, after all, and so that's 30 minutes I'll have spared myself of playing around on the software.

Now, this is a pretty complicated pose! It's in a weird angle and the bodies are making contact in ways I'm not used to depicting, so I did choose to whip out VaM for this one. I went into the program and after some messing around, I flopped my little dolls together like this:

Now something really cool about VaM is that you can completely customize your models, and if you have the patience, I would definitely encourage you to do so! Obviously, you don't have to make picture perfect replicas of every single character you have, but as you can see here I have made a DU drow "decoy" to help me better understand some of his features when I draw him: he has a strong brow, a short nose, a square jawline - these are all going to look a very specific way from certain angles, and I might not always be sure of how to draw it right! So it's useful to have models that bear SOME semblance to the character so you can better understand how different viewpoints will affect their bone structure and mass.

Also thank fucking god for the elf-ear slider. Figuring out how to draw those shits from certain angles was a huge pain in the ass when I started drawing DnD races.

So, with the reference in hand, I go over the sketch again:

Now you may notice that I don't stick to the reference 100%. There's three reasons for this:

posing on VaM is tedious as hell. You can get something incredibly natural looking and picture-perfect to reference from if you wish, but it's going to take you hours to do. So, for the most part I just slap guys together until the results are "close enough" and use that.

In my opinion, you should always aim to ENHANCE your reference material, not replicate it exactly!

While VaM is a PRETTY DANG GOOD source of anatomical reference, it isn't perfect, I often supplement it with further reference from real life resources or make tweaks based on my own knowledge where I catch it falling short (and, antithetical to what I just said, I sometimes fuck the anatomy up further on purpose if I think it looks better that way LOL it's all jazz baby).

Then lines, color, yada yada. I don't have a tutorial on that and I don't think I could make one, because my process is chaotic as hell, but I do at times use Virt-a-mate as loose reference for lighting too when coloring - waaaaayyyy less so however, because that process is even more tedious and I feel like I often get better results by just winging it. It is a feature of the program though, and I'm sure it would be helpful for someone who has a difficult time visualizing lights and shadows. I only started using this program a few months ago, so I happened to already have a pretty good understanding of that kind of thing and just don't personally feel like I get much out of that particular mechanic.

Here's a few other examples of pieces that I made reference for (WARNING: Suggestive)

Now, for the question many of you may want to ask:

"Can I trace this junk?"

And to that, I say: Buddy, you can do whatever the hell you want with the reference material you created.

However,

If your goal is to learn and improve your art, and to recreate realistic proportions and anatomy from memory, tracing won't help you.

Developing your own style, your muscle memory, and personal technique will all be hindered by choosing to trace instead of drawing from observation, so I would encourage against it. Hell - even when tracing is employed as a technique, it's usually by high-skill realism & concept artists who are looking to either cut some corners, save time, or just double-check their own proportions in order to improve further - if you try tracing as a beginner, you will most definitely find the result to still look stiff and "off".

So trust me, there is so much more to be gained from drawing from observation. Make note of tangents, compare proportions, use all the elements of the picture to dictate where and how things should go - it will be a far more rewarding experience.

Hopefully this has been helpful! VaM is a really cheap program (you get it on the guys' patreon for I think 8 dollars, just google it!) and it's definitely been worth my money as an artist since I found it. Learning to use it can be a little intimidating at first glance, but as I said above you only really need a day plus one or two tutorials to get a hang of the interface.

A fair warning though, IT IS A SOFTWARE MADE FOR VIRTUAL SEX/ADULT ANIMATION So when looking it up expect to see a some spicy content.

#Funfact THIS is the post that got me flagged last time so i'm really tempting fate right now LOL #ask #art #tutorial #resource

573 notes · View notes

insidefernweh · 2 years

Text

Well, hello.

A couple months ago one silly woman (me) decided that it’s time for creativity to take a hold of her and let something cool into this world.

And that’s how I decided to give birth to…a The Amazing Devil blanket. Or I might have dreamed it whilst being feverish. Who knows.

It’s been three months of stitching, embroidering, sewing, unmaking the mistakes, cursing, saying ‘waahheeey’ at the end of the complete step, cursing again and enjoying the hell out of the process of something being made into the realness.

It is literally the embodiment of me. I love it and hate it equally. It has got my favourite quotes from the songs. Yes, that’s me — your favourite girl with maelstrom of lyrics instead of a brain. It also has got some of my blood somewhere along the stitches (did i do it on purpose to please the fae gods aka Joey and Madeleine? you’ll never know. hashtag blood magic.) I wanted to get it done for the Ruin Appreciation Week (though it contains lyrics from all albums) so that was me last week because it was very FAR from being done:

I’m posting the bigger picture + close ups of smaller details and songs’ lyrics. Please feel free to reach out if you want to see a better close up or just to pat me on the head.

I’m posting a video too. It’s silly so enjoey. (ha! see what I did here. that was a typing accident. it’s 1am now. forgive me my jokes.)

warning: the video include some probably offensive actions to the professional seamstresses. i’m only a humble ignorant person who decided to sew for the first time in her life. i do hope you’ll like it.

references used:

the central embroidery: TAD’s old picture from some posters back in the love run era + some sage and forget-me-nots

top right and left bottom corners: pictures of joey and madeleine

songs: secret worlds, the calling, inkpot gods, drinking song for the socially anxious, chords, farewell wanderlust, not yet/love run (reprise), that unwanted animal, battle cries, elsa’s song, wild blue yonder

UPD: A few of you have been asking about the quotes I used on my blanket/quilt and why I chose them so here I am:

If you ask me for my fire, just watch me burn — you know what, I recently started to interpret this line in a positive way? It was a recent thing I understood about myself. I always thought I was good at working/doing things well in the long run, when you have to do it patiently and for years but in my journey of self-discovery I realized that in reality I’m much better as a sprinter — someone who does an incredible job while being under the vast amount of pressure and when you need to do it in a restricted period of time; I will give all of myself to this project/work, every bit of passion I have, every bit of patience. So yeah. If you ask me for my fire — just watch me burn. But then I’ll hibernate for a month.

Can’t you hear it howling? — OKAY HANDS DOWN PROBABLY MY FAVOURITE LYRICS/MELODY SECTION FROM THE WHOLE RUIN ALBUM. Even not the part that is sung by Madeleine, but the back voices Joey’s harmonies sing in the final chorus at 4:28 and till the end. OOOOH WHY SO GOOD.

If I don’t make it back from where i’ve gone just know I loved you all along — this is such a beautiful closing of the song. also such a tormenting thought. i love it.

Such endless blue — I’ve always been drawn to the dark blue colours, especially when I paint. I always run out of the blue watercolour because contrary to this song, it’s not endless :D I’m manifesting an abyss of blue watercolour for myself here lol

You say the words so often but I barely know the meaning — okay so Elsa’ Song is primarily pretty heartbreaking right? The more heartbreaking part being that it is sung as a lullaby. Who didn’t have that moment when the meaning of the words you’re saying slips through your fingers just because you said them too often? Who didn’t have that sad awakening moment of losing trust in a person just because they always promised something and never did it?

After summers of fasting I feel hunger at last — I’ve been thinking about tattooing this quote for quite a while now. It reminds me of my depressive state which very often returned to me in summer and every time it slowly creeped away, I felt the hunger for life in the early autumn. Every time felt like an eternity.

Is nought but fumble-falls and guns and tumbleweeds, love, run — my favourite quote from the superior use of the English language that is that section in Love Run. I am in love with it. All the phonetic twirls makes me shiver sometimes.

Well, hello my hollow Holofernes — ALLITERATION SUPREMACY!!

I’ll sing silence and ask my glass of wine for guidance — i love to sit at home alone and stare into my glass. it doesn’t answer though. what about it. and again — to sing silence? OXYMORONS GIVE ME THEM

Go tell me how we fucked you up and oh my god, it’s so unfair — ah. the hardship of parenting/teaching. I was there, I remember it all too well.

Let’s us waltz for the dead — the oxymoronic style of this line IS JUST A CHEF’S KISS. WALTZ? VERY SOPHISTICATED THING? FOR THE DEAD? NOT THAT PLEASANT TYPE OF A THING? mister batey let me boop you affectionately on the nose you are so clever.

#the amazing devil #joey batey #madeleine hyland #embroidery #ruinanniversary2022

1K notes · View notes

tabithatwo · 1 year

Text

it's yellowjackets / jennifer's body parallels time!

hi hello keep reading if you would like to hear about shauna/jennifer and jackie/needy, here's my totally noncomprehensive, very much off the cuff thoughts on this very complex and interesting dynamic!!

(i'm not getting into the basic parallels, i'm gonna assume you know the karyn kusama of it all, the heart necklace, the homoerotic female friendship, the death)

yellowjackets is so brilliant because it feeds you stereotypes and absolutely does not deliver on them. there could be an entire paper on each girl and how this is true for them specifically, but walk quickly with me because i want to get into the nitty gritty gory fun stuff! a brief oversimplified example: nat is referred to as a burnout, some would assume she's a loner based on that, but she cares about the team as a unit more than arguably anyone else. (this is common in real life too, our stereotypes often don't hold water in reality and yj reflects that beautifully!)

now to the jackie/shauna of it all. it would be oh so incredibly easy to look at jackie and think she's the jennifer of the duo. we are set up to see her as prettier, more popular, more demanding. but that illusion falls apart QUICKLY if you pay attention to the things that jackie actually says and does. she's not a mean girl. she's actually one of the kindest on the team. she doesn't pick on shauna, she clings. there are plenty of takes on this on tumblr so i won't exhaust it, my adhd loves to digress and meander but i'm forcing myself back onto the trodden path to this point: people look at the first few minutes of the pilot and they immediately decide that they know who these girls are. the audience typecasts jackie as a jennifer and shauna as a needy. the popular, bubbly girl and her shy, bookworm best friend.

a lot of people, especially casual viewers who don't study this show like its their job (god, wonder what that would be like lol) understandably stop here. but to me the BRILLIANCE of yj is that they don't actually make it HARD for you to undo your initial impressions. the material is there. it isn't hidden. it isn't some deeper self of each character that is unraveled throughout seasons. they push, push, push to see just how far they can carry our deeply held stereotypes/expectations. how forward and violent can shauna be, with viewers still clinging to a shy and sweet girl, who was really their own creation? how kind and honestly pathetic kicked-puppy can jackie be, with viewers still clinging to a mean girl, who was really their own creation? how far will we go to warp the characters intentions, so that we can keep them in the box we understand them in? they ask this of the viewer and of other characters, but AGAIN i digress.

so, while this might sit strangely with some, yes i think that jackie is very much aligned with needy if you peel back just one layer. but far above and beyond that, shauna is so very fucking jennifer.

the overall veneer is thinned immediately in yj. there isn't one girl in the stands and one on center stage. jackie and shauna are both on the team. they go to the same parties, they play the same sport, i would argue that shauna isn't even coded as "less pretty" (please note the word coded, because i'm not saying needy is literally less pretty than jennifer, i am simply saying that we have hair, makeup, clothing, glasses trends that we use to stereotype characters, are you with me?)

so now what? now these girls are both and neither. shauna thinks that she is the needy to jackie's jennifer. jackie wears the necklace and the introductory shots frame her as important. but we're already diverting from that set-up.

our absolute clearest common denominator here is one that i rarely see people mention funnily enough: JENNIFER IS A SUCCUBUS. she CONSUMES. she KILLS. she WANTS and she TAKES.

now before you get TOO EXCITED!!! i see some of you getting ready to say i'm a shauna shipman hater, put the pitchforks down!! shauna is one of my favorite characters of all time. i love her crazy ass so deeply that it's alarming. (i don't hate jennifer, either, for the record.) i love her largely for WHAT she is. i think sanitizing or sweetening her is a disservice. she's amazing and complex and wounded and capable of deep love. but she also, quite LITERALLY, consumes.

her character is sex and desire and violence and obsession and consumption. and it's AMAZING. she's POWERFUL. she's our main framing character (in this dynamic), rather than needy. the scripts are switched. jennifer dies and needy lives, and that's one story. that's clearer cut, simpler, made for a horror film. but here, jackie dies and shauna lives, and that story is deep and rich and goes on to include a whole lot more death and destruction and chaos.

shauna tells us herself that it excites her. she likes it. she is this girl. this woman. she reminisces and she recreates and she covets.

jennifer tries to consume needy, shauna literally consumes jackie.

there's more to this story, obviously. you could deep dive and mine for the intricacies of the set up and fall of stereotype and expectation, or collect all of the exact parallels. but i'll stick with a few, because this is a quick outburst of thought.

a huge one, who is taking whose boyfriend?

here's another personal favorite of mine, just for kicks

is it too complex to neatly tuck away? absolutely. they're different stories with different themes. shauna isn't simply a teenager possessed by a demon. it runs far deeper. as is the essence of this show.

but if you want to look at parallels, look at the one who has been holding the knife the whole time.

#can you tell both of these stories make me crazy #i love shauna this is not shauna hate this is shauna LOVE do not misinterpret pls #you guys she EATS people!!#anon who just messaged me about this YES I see you I’m with you here are my thoughts lol #yellowjackets #yellowjackets meta #jennifer's body #shauna shipman #jennifer check #jackie taylor #anita needy lesnicki #karyn kusama #shauna x jackie #jackie x shauna #jackieshauna #shaunajackie

391 notes · View notes

roronoagem · 4 months

Text

𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐎𝐔𝐓 𝐀𝐒 𝐆𝐄𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑𝐅𝐋𝐔𝐈𝐃.

characters: strawhats + portgas d. ace + trafalgar d. water law

content warning: genderfluid reader (any prns), general fluff + not proofread.

a/n: hello !! this is very self indulgent, as i am genderfluid myself lol. i thought why not sharing as someone else might find comfort in this or anything, so yeah this is why we’re here — not one of my best works ngl, but as i said i mainly wrote this for myself sooo. i hope you’ll enjoy it & that you guys are having a good day <3

𝐋𝐔𝐅𝐅𝐘.

would tilt his head to the side and try to understand.

“you change name?”

“nope, i just use any pronouns.”

“ooh! alright. i’ll try it right now!”

“guys! [y/n] said to use all pronouns, they… look cool,” he tries, frowning a little. “and he’s the best! she’s smart,” he added then, being sure to use all of them.

is actually very attentive about it and reminds the others to use them all if they keep using the same ones.

𝐙𝐎𝐑𝐎.

“okay. like he and she together in a phrase?”

you nod and watch him thinking about something.

“[y/n] is smart and i like his fighting style and… her face is cute?” he tilts his head to the side, waiting for your response.

“you can use they too, like… they are cute,” you suggest, smiling at him for the effort. “right, my bad darling.”

zoro is very good at switching pronouns and seems to do it without thinking >_<

𝐒𝐀𝐍𝐉𝐈.

“whatever my sweet darling desires! i’m gonna make him all their favourite dishes and kiss her lips and–”

you giggle and interrupt him, or else he would just keep going.

reminds the rest of the crew about changing pronouns frequently when talking about you, he wants you to feel comfortable and accepted and most importantly, yourself.

this is your family, after all.

𝐍𝐀𝐌𝐈.

she catches on pretty easily.

uses all of your preferred pronouns, even asks you if you prefer he or she or they for the day.

i see nami getting paid by whoever keeps using the same pronouns over and over again as a punishment or sum.

she’s no joke.

𝐔𝐒𝐎𝐏𝐏.

super supportive !!

you know what, i think usopp would genuinely buy a pin with the genderfluid flag on it and put it on his clothes, stating proudly that his darling is genderfluid.

has not trouble using any pronouns in the same sentence.

if he knows you feel like using specific pronouns for the day, he goes on correcting whoever is talking using the wrong pronouns.

𝐂𝐇𝐎𝐏𝐏𝐄𝐑.

would genuinely ask more about the genderfluid stuff.

because he wants to learn, and be as supportive as possible.

“i’ll try my best and use them all!”

he, in fact, did use all the pronouns.

jokes aside, he constantly reminds the crew that you use all pronouns — they’re well aware, but still give chopper the satisfaction, you know?

𝐑𝐎𝐁𝐈𝐍.

“oh, i’ve heard about genderfluid people.”

robin makes sure to ask you what pronouns you prefer to use from time to time.

she wants you to feel accepted and comfortable, that’s the least she can do.

avoids gendered terms if you’re more comfortable this way.

would kindly reminds to use all pronouns.

( alr, this ^ is referred to whoever is not part of the crew )

𝐅𝐑𝐀𝐍𝐊𝐘.

“my [y/n] is super! they’re super! he’s super! she’s super!!”

yeah he uses them all the time.

but you can say if you prefer one in particular, don’t worry.

he would inform the others, pretty loudly.

i believe franky would be careful to use non-gendered terms, just like robin.

𝐁𝐑𝐎𝐎𝐊.

is a bit confused, not gonna lie.

but he’s keen to listen and learn !

uses different pronouns easily, and asks if he’s doing alright and if you’re comfortable.

i think he would avoid gendered terms too? idk . .

𝐀𝐂𝐄.

“that’s amazing! . . what does it mean?”

you have to explain better, but ace is smart he catches on quickly and goes on trying to use all the pronouns in one sentence.

reminds the whole crew that you’re genderfluid and that they should use any pronouns with you.

i genuinely think he would stick to non-gendered terms too, but would use boyfriend and girlfriend or whatever too if you want. ( hope that makes sense lol )

𝐋𝐀𝐖.

would listen seriously as you explain and come out.

“do you want me to avoid gendered terms? i can tell the others to do the same if you’re more comfortable.”

genuinely wants to create an accepting and comfortable environment for you to be yourself *cries*.

pss pss . . . law would buy a genderfluid pin too — and he has the audacity to think you wouldn’t notice.

would kindly remind the others to use all pronouns.

( this one ^, in fact, works for the crew too /hj )

92 notes · View notes

lxmelle · 1 month

Text

Sometimes I wonder to myself, what did Yuta hear from Miguel about Geto, seeing as they were from the same “family”/group/cult/side. They did train together for a few months in Africa.

Headcanon/Speculation post under the cut:

After events in jjk 0, considering how hurt his friends were, and Geto’s motives that would’ve been at the expense of his life, I wonder if he ever changed his mind about Geto or even warmed up to the idea of him as a person. I mean, he ended up being friends with (or should I say, student of?) Miguel and also Gojo? People whom we can safely say were close to Geto.

Nevertheless, he looked past that and in the Culling Games, he put his respect for his sensei (Gojo) above any personal feelings he might’ve had for Geto. Still pictures Geto like an evil dude though, LOL.

So Yuta expresses his desire to spare his sensei from killing his best friend again.

At some point, he must have deduced that Geto was the one who Gojo was referring to in jjk 0. He was perceptive - below are snaps of the light novel translations and the manga. What does Yuta surmise from this?

At some point, Yuta seems to have a strong idea that Geto is someone really irreplaceable Gojo, even if he personally cannot relate; hence, I guess, still viewing Geto as a villain. Yuta also encapsulates a philosophy surrounding friendship and empathy:

There is no confirmation to my knowledge of what happened to Geto’s body that allowed Kenjaku to inhabit it. All we know is that Shoko wasn’t given his body for a proper... processing, and that it could either be to spare her, or spare Gojo’s feelings or thoughts about what Geto would’ve wanted, I’m inclined to believe the latter is more probable. Because Geto’s principles were self-sacrificing as such: for his family to escape - even if it meant HE DIED as the cult leader, that their safety was his main priority. He was kind (albeit selectively). And I guess his legacy could go on - somehow. I don’t think he cared too much about himself.

Anyway, Gojo’s returning of the body to Geto’s family may be what he opted for: as these people were important to Geto, they are therefore important to him. This may have put him in contact with Miguel, and led to Yuta training under him too.

But this is all speculation on my part. Yuta does have a very strong sense of comradeship/kinship and it is no surprise he thinks like this, whether or not Gojo had a part in shaping this. Nevertheless, it seems clear that he has an understanding of what Geto meant to Gojo.

This is partly light-hearted, but whatever Yuta concluded, Gojo isn’t likely to have a girlfriend (LOL).

Miguel doesn’t want to see Gojo for some reason (LOL) was he a bit traumatised from the battle? Or was it also to do with Geto being killed by his hand? Oh, to be a literary fly on the wall within the series to hear all these conversations!

And just side-stepping here:

Gojo has been trying to adopt these to/be-executed kids to change the world, hasn’t he? Gojo carries on his trial-and-error form of delivering a form of justice (in a much much more pardonable/acceptable and measured way compared to Geto), delaying execution orders for people whom he takes on as students. But this is also quite typical of Yin and Yang energy they each represent which I’m in midst of gathering my thoughts about… for another post.

I think we can speculate easily that he was seeing if there could ever be an opportunity for Geto to “come back home” to their side. He tolerated a lot; both parties thinking of each other like a game of cat and mouse where the cat permits and allows the mouse some ground to wander, until lines are crossed and his hand is forced.

Satosugu dynamics and their shared goals and their yin&yang and how much they needed each other... brainnnnrotttt...

Anyway, this is kinda all over the place but I wanted to add this nugget too:

The panel is referring to playful cloud. At first glance, it read to me as if Gojo saw cautioning Megumi because it was a precious item. It sounded like a threat: don’t you dare lose it. In Japanese, there is also emphasis on “absoluutely don’t (lose it)”. Of course Gojo lightens the mood with making it about a monetary thing (which is comparatively safe territory) rather than giving other reasons why.

I like to think he was a bit sentimental, but also happy to share this tool with his precious students, knowing that the shared memory within this object can also help make them stronger. Much to maki’s distaste though, lol. It was the last tool that Geto had used, and was now in his possession. He was happy for making to use it; despite her reservations over it, but her emotions may encourage her to become skilled at it. As Gojo says, tough love!

And Yuta’s ID - the last thing Geto gave him (aside from his life - ouch).

I wonder how long it took him to return it? By this time, Yuta has a new uniform that is now not a special grade (but it apparently just takes him 3 months to get promoted again).

In my mind, it seems clear that Yuta was perceptive enough or was told by others / heard from people around him about Geto and the relationship he shared with Gojo. He respected his sensei enough to share the sentimentality over his relationship, and from a reader’s perspective, there are so many parallels in jjk 0 that are impossible to ignore.

Anyway, as I’m writing this, there are so many things popping into my head, it’s no wonder fans call this obsession BRAINROT.

I hope this post made for an interesting read, even if some of it becomes repetitive if you consume a lot of what many other writers put out there! I can only hope I have some of their talents in articulation.

#I just had to put my thoughts down because they fester #satosugu theories #satosugu analysis #yuta okkotsu #satosugu #stsg #jjk spoilers #jjk meta #jjk analysis #jujutsu kaisen #gojo satoru #geto suguru #jjk #jjk wordvomit #jjk 0 #jjk manga #jjk light novel

61 notes · View notes

natalyarose · 5 days

Text

𝑅𝑒𝒻𝓁𝑒𝒸𝓉𝒾𝑜𝓃𝓈 𝒶𝒷𝑜𝓊𝓉 𝓂𝓎 𝒶𝓇𝓉… (𝒽𝑒𝓁𝓁𝑜, 𝒮𝓊𝓃 𝒾𝓃 𝐵𝒽𝒶𝓇𝒶𝓃𝒾!)

~ This is a bit of a personal one lol, maybe I'm getting a little too comfy on tumblr- but hey, I like it here and I'm very grateful for everyone who's taken an interest in whatever I have to say :)

~ tagging this on Nakshatra tumblr because I feel like this reflection perfectly encapsulates Venus Nakshatras and is very aligned with the Sun moving into Bharani, the birth of Venus among the Nakshatras

// warning, cringe and angsty lmao

I have such an odd relationship with my artistic process. Unconventional? Stubborn. Sometimes just straight up bad lol.

I want to create beautiful, meaningful things, yet I have this sort of extreme resistance to being perfect or professionalism (however, somehow perfectionism and such a ruthless self-antagonism for not being 'enough' at the same time..).

It's almost like I purposely sabotage my art by intentionally leaving in mistakes, or leaving it somewhat dishevelled in protest of perfection. In hopes that the beauty and artistry still manages to shine through to the right people.

I guess it's also this thing where I feel like the imperfection makes art more unique, more exclusive- more personal & dearly held to the people who do find the beauty in it that I initially wanted to communicate. But, there is a difference between artsy, grungy, rawness and... just being crap, lazy, unrefined, undisciplined. (I'd never refer to someone else's work in this way but myself... mann).

Knowing full well that my artistic creation likely 'needs work', is not a finished product and will very likely be criticised for its' imperfection, I still have the overwhelming urge to go ahead and share it with the world/post it. In all of its' messy (again, maybe just straight up bad lol) glory. Then I wonder why I'm not gaining the traction I want haha. When I inevitably receive criticism, I get so hurt by it, I beat myself up and it eats at me to the point that I can't sleep at night, I'm up reciting the criticisms in my head and weaving them into my very own nightmare!

I don't understand why I do this to myself lmao. Later on after posting & putting myself out there, I hear that imperfection in the song, I hear those vocal parts I stubbornly left in and didn't want to redo, I see the dodgy brush strokes I refused to fix up in the name of authenticity, and I cringe. In fact, I feel such a deep shame for it all that I take everything down out of embarrassment. Even though it was fully my decision to put up something amateur sounding and imperfect.

Maybe it's something like the weight of desire for perfection is too much, so I just go 'to hell with it!'.

It's like an endless cycle for me, and I realise that over the years, if I'd just left things up online and was more patient with myself, I'd probably have cultivated a following of some sort by now, or maybe used peoples' criticisms to improve the art to a greater extent. I mean, there are people who have mentioned to me when they notice the art is imperfect and needs work, but there are just as many lovely people who have gone totally out of their way to express deep appreciation for the music/art I've put out and enjoyed it.

Here's my 'theory' as to why I do this to myself: when I create art, I don't just want to make pretty things, though I want that too. I want to be loved, and FELT. I want to bring people to this raw, vulnerable place in my heart where my ideas emerge from. I want to be loved not in spite of the imperfections, but alongside them, all encompassing.

I don't want to have to be perfect, have $1000 worth of equipment, hours and hours of recording time trying to 'get it right' in order to be understood and deemed beautiful. I don't want to show off how perfect or skilled I am either, I want to make people feel something. I want it natural.

r a w.

I kinda enjoy for art to be unfinished and slightly unpalatable on purpose.

Maybe it's a bit of entitlement on my part, expecting that even if I do a mediocre job, people will still enjoy it and see my 'talents'/message.

Truth be told though, that's how I love other people, how I enjoy others' art as well, it's not just something with me.

When I listen to artists I love, I adore seeing something beautiful, yet somehow messy and jarring. A sort of underground-esque, 'wild feminine' creation. It evokes that much more feeling and passion that something designed to be perfect just lacks to me.

I can't get into a lot of bands that are considered 'objectively good' by many people because they just sound too perfect to me- There's a lot of times I come across artists that sound technically good, very clean but my heart just can't get into it. I find myself listening and thinking 'I wish this was recorded on a toaster', or 'I wish there was a more rough sound to the vocals' lol, I crave the rawness & intimacy that imperfection and roughness lends.

Ugh, it all creates such an internal conflict- like I want my art to be seen, to be loved yet I somewhat reject things it takes for the art to be considered objectively good & well rounded.

The harsh reality might just be that just because I see the beauty in imperfection, just because I know I've got this personal, very niche vision of what 'good' sounds like/looks like in my mind, that doesn't mean other people are going to find value in the same things.

Of course, maybe all of this is just pretentious excuses & my own self-hatred manifested (I don't actively hate myself, I try to be much kinder to myself these days but yknow)

Anyway, I realised that it's the start of Bharani season in galactic centre mid-mula Ayanamsa today & I think this write up really aligns with that.

Thankyou for reading lol.. again, a bit of an angsty personal thing but maybe it could be relevant to someone, if y'all wanna know what Venusian artistic angst looks like in real time lmao 🖤🥀

#nakshatras #astrology #music #artist #aesthetic #vedic astro observations #venus

34 notes · View notes

mbakuetshurisprincess · 1 year

Text

Back to Black Part 2

AN: Hey y'all! The love on Back to Black was actually mind-blowing, like I had no idea y'all would like it THAT much lol. I’m glad though it was definitely really fun to write something different for Shuri and make her (I don’t wanna say the villain that seems so harsh lol) not the good guy in a fic. This is turning out to be more of a slow burn but I PROMISE all will end well… eventually. Also about the music, I’m a HUGE Amy Winehouse fan, like love that white woman DOWN! So I’m gonna pick a different song from her discography for every chapter of this fic, something that relates to the theme of this chapter. That taglist was hell to do and I don’t even think it worked fr fr, how do the pros do their tag list??

Summary: After vowing to never step foot in Wakanda again, unforeseen circumstances bring you back and face to face with everything (and everyone) you left.

Pairing: Shuri x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Cursing, alcoholism.

Word count: 3,085

Suggested listening: Love Is a Losing Game by Amy Winehouse

“Love is a losing game

One I wished I never played

Oh, what a mess we made

And now, the final frame

Love is a losing game”

“Sit.” You instructed Shuri, positioning her body over the closed toilet seat. She sat down with a sigh, leaning her head back against the wall behind the toilet and closing her eyes. You took the moment of her eyes not being on yours to look at her in the light.

She had lost a lot of her color, and while her skin was still a deep chocolate color, it lacked the depth that Wakandan sunlight brought her. Her jawline had gotten sharper, a telltale sign that she wasn’t eating as much as she needed to anymore. And although her eyes were closed, her brow remained furrowed. As if even in her thoughts she came face to face with the problems she was trying to avoid.

Shuri opened her eyes and caught a glimpse of you looking down at her. She recognized the look that you were giving her, it was the same way you looked at her the first time she had come out of her lab after her six-month self-containment. At that time Shuri swore she would never do anything to make you feel like that again, clearly by the look you were giving her, she had failed.

“Unbutton your shirt and get undressed, I’m going to run you a bath okay?” Shuri nodded in response and you turned on your heels, breaking your gaze from her. You approached the tub and reached to grab the tablet that controlled it.

“I- I haven't let anyone change anything Y/N, all of your settings are still there,” Shuri spoke hesitantly. She was referring to the presets you had on set up for the tub. Shuri realized when you were dating just how much you loved baths, so as a surprise she tricked the whole tub out for you. Allowing you to make custom presets that each had varying temperatures, scents, and even playlists. You smiled lightly to yourself at the memories as your fingers clicked the relaxation button. Instantly hot water began flowing out of the tub spout and the drain locked. Your playlist entitled “Best of Amy Winehouse” started playing and the smile never left your face. The smell of lavender filled the air and even though this was supposed to be for Shuri you immediately felt calmer.

Remembering Shuri’s word about not changing anything you opened the drawers next to the tub grabbing a bottle of lavender bubble bath. You poured a capful in and instantly bubbles filled the tub, another one of Shuri’s more mundane inventions: crazy strong bubble bath.

You turned back to face Shuri and found her in no better state than you left her in. Her hands were fiddling with her buttons, the tired expression still on her face. She hadn’t made it past the first button.

“Let me help you Shuri.” You said softly walking over to her. You crouched between her legs and allowed your fingers to find the buttons she struggled on. Shuri didn't move her hands and after a second she started swatting yours away.

“I can do it myself Y/N.” She said looking down at you through her heavy lids.

You took a deep breath in and exhaled softly. “You never could let anyone else help you could you?” She was now stuck on the second button, her slender fingers unable to push it through the hole.

“I-” Shuri went to speak before deciding not to, you were right and even in her drunk, hungover state she knew it. She dropped her hands to her sides and broke her eye contact with you. Your hands resumed their place and quickly undid the button.

“I’m not going to fight you Shuri.” You said moving on to the next button. “I’m not gonna sit here and fight you with every step of this. I’m here to help and if you don’t want it I have no problem leaving.” You looked up at her and she sent you a nod of understanding.

You finished the rest of the buttons and pulled the shirt off of her shoulders leaving her in only the wife beater she wore as an undershirt and her shorts. You stood from between her legs and held your hands out for her to take, she obliged. She delicately placed her hands in yours and stood up, standing a good amount taller than you. You unbuttoned her shorts and slid them down her legs as she stepped out of them. Both of you were aware of how little physical space now existed between the two of you.

Seeing her now in this more vulnerable state you were aware of just how sick she looked. While Shuri had always been slender you could now see her ribcage peeking through her skin and her once-toned body had lost much of the muscle she developed through hard training with Okoye. Shuri felt the concern in the way you were observing her and it instantly made her cross her arms to her chest, not wanting you to see any of her new scars.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to stare.” You said, removing your eyes from her body and putting them on the floor. “You can um finish undressing, I’ll go get you a towel.” You started walking backward away from her, creating distance between the two of you.

“You don’t have to leave sthandwa.” Shuri’s hands found the bottom of her shirt, pulling it up revealing some of her torso. Her hands caught your eyes, following her hands, and would they have continued as she pulled her shirt up further but the sound of the water stopping pulled you back into reality. At the sound, you spun your back to face her and walked quickly out of the room, face flushed. You needed to get your head back on straight. A few pet names and a flash of her body weren’t enough to make you forget what had happened.

You heard the sound of her body entering the water and a groan accompanying it letting you know that Shuri was in the tub. You dug through the dresser drawers and pulled out an array of butters and lotions for Shuri after the shower, along with a variety of hair products. You retrieved a large fluffy towel with a matching washcloth, a hair wrap, a new set of pajamas, and some of the hair products. You set the pajamas down on the bed before making your way back into the bathroom. Shuri’s body sat emerged in the tub with only her collar bones peeking out above the bubbles. You hung the towel and hair wrap up on a nearby towel warmer and returned to Shuri.

Her eyes were closed and her head was tilted back, resting on the edge of the tub. You grabbed some of the body wash and squirted it onto the washcloth, dipping it into the water and rubbing it together to get it soapy. You removed her arm that was closest to you from the water and started washing it. Your mind had memorized the various scars and bruises that littered her body and as you moved further up her neck to her collarbone the memories of how she got each one faded back to you.

It wasn’t until you got to the part of her chest that peaked out of the water that you noticed a new scar. It was no more than three inches long and by the looks of it couldn’t have been there longer than a few months. You ran your finger over it and felt the ridges signifying that it hadn’t healed correctly.

Shuri could read your mind by the expression on your face and the way your hand gently touched her chest. “It doesn't hurt Y/N.”

You looked over at her, you hadn’t even noticed Shuri open her eyes. Assuming the hot water and lavender had put her to sleep. You wanted to speak, to tell her that you would make sure that it healed correctly, but the words wouldn’t come to your mouth. It was almost as if your body was reminding you that healing Shuri in that way wasn’t your place anymore. So you simply nodded and continued cleaning her body.

After you felt her body had been cleaned, you grabbed the showerhead off the wall and positioned it over Shuri’s hair before turning it on. Once again Shuri let out a soft groan as the warm water touched her scalp. You used your free hand to start finger detangling some of her curls, upon realizing this was going to be a job that needed both your hands you grabbed a bottle of leave-in detangler and poured it generously over Shuri's head. You set it down on the side of the tub and massaged the substance into her scalp and curls with delicate hands.

“I miss you Y/N,” Shuri said, opening her eyes and tilting her head to look up at you.

You took a deep breath before speaking “Shuri, you moved your head, I was working on the back, and now I can’t reach it.”

Shuri tilted her head back down and you continued your work in silence for a minute before she spoke again.

“That is all you have to say?” This time she didn’t move her head so she didn’t catch you rolling your eyes. You dipped your hands into the water washing the excess product off. You stood finally from the spot you had been in for the past hour and looked down at Shuri. Normally she could tell your mood by the way your eyes looked, but for some reason now she couldn’t place your emotions.

“What I have to say is,” You walked over to the towel warmer, grabbed Shuri’s towel and hair wrap, and set it on the sink next to her. “This is your towel and hair wrap. I left lotion, butters, and pj’s on the bed. Dry off, lotion up, get dressed, and call for me when you're done, I’ll be outside the door waiting to do your hair.” The first part of the sentence was almost cold enough to make Shuri think you might not have any feelings left for her, but the second half. She heard the softness come out in your voice when you mentioned doing her hair. She hadn’t lost you yet.

She thought about giving a witty remark but didn’t want to push her luck with you on your first day back so Shuri responded with a simple “Okay.”

You exited the bathroom and then your room closing the door behind you. You leaned against the door and took a deep breath, “Focus.” You reminded yourself. You figured it would take Shuri at least twenty minutes to get herself situated given her state, you chose the time to enter her room again, opening her blinds immediately. You called to Isoke who stood guard outside of the door and she came in.

“Yes ma’am?” She spoke softly, her eyes looking straight down. You hadn’t seen her much during your time in Wakanda and if you remembered correctly she had just graduated when you left.

“Can you please have the cleaners sent in? I want this place looking more like a home when we bring Shuri back here.” Isoke nodded and turned on her heels.

“Oh and one more thing.” You spoke, causing her to pause in her tracks. “Every bottle of alcohol, every ounce of weed, all her paraphernalia, everything. I want it boxed up and burned. Do you understand me?” She nodded again and quickly scurried out of the room.

You couldn’t place it but something about her leaving you feeling unwell. You walked around Shuri’s room to see if you could find anything else to help you understand Shuri’s mental state. In her bed, you found an object that nearly brought tears to your eyes. It was the Build-a-bear you two had made on one of your trips to America. By the way its fur had started to matt you could tell she had been sleeping with it. You couldn’t tell how much time had passed but the soft call of your name brought you out of Shuri’s room and back to your own. Where Shuri now sat in the all-black pajama set that you had picked out for her, waiting for you.

You looked once more at the hair products you had pulled out, ensuring that you had everything you needed. Once you were sure you sat down on the edge of the bed. You and Shuri had done this before but unlike normal this time, she waited for your signal. You gesture in between your legs and Shuri quickly scurried into her place, being this close to you was all she desired.

Before the cheating and couples therapy and more cheating, when you were still able to pull Shuri from her lab with just a sweet smile. You would devote Sunday evenings to doing her hair, an intimate act she had only let her mother do before you. She would sit in between your legs and speak of anything that frustrated her or what inventions were not working. You would listen as you detangled and twisted her hair, preparing it for the long week ahead. Eventually similar to a child when she had finally tired herself out of complaining she would lean her head against your leg and pepper kisses to the inside of your thigh before she fell asleep. The feeling of Shuri letting you take care of her was something you cherished, especially as your relationship furthered and the time you spent together became less and less. Every once and a while when she was particularly stressed she would come to you and ask you to do her hair. And you always obliged.

You silently began your work on her hair as she sat, first separating her hair into four sections and then working with her hair a fourth at a time. You ran a wide tooth comb through her hair, starting at the ends and making your way up, in order not to snag any knots. After detangling, you split the section into fourths and twisted each fourth. You had made your way through the second section and were onto the third when Shuri rose her voice and spoke up.

“Why did you come back Y/N?” You stopped humming, considering if you even wanted to give her an answer.

“Nakia and Okoye came to get me.” You continued combing through the third section.

“And you just agreed? All the messages I sent you begging for you to come back to us didn’t mean as much as their words?” You had not forgotten what drunk Shuri was like and this was a symptom of that. There was a hint of anger in her words that didn’t go unnoticed by you.

You let out a sigh, clearly a common theme for the night, and spoke. “No, I didn't want to come back Shuri, when I said I never wanted to return, I meant it.”

“So why did you?” Shuri snaked her left arm under your left leg, wrapping it around so her hand could rest on the top of your thigh. Her words seemed accusatory but the way her hand was sitting on your thigh, that was nothing short of romantic.

You started twisting her hair before you spoke. “They told me you started drinking again.”

“I-” Shuri tried to speak but you cut her off.

“Although truthfully that wasn’t what did it.” You moved on to the next twist. “Nakia begged. She said you refuse T’Challa and begged that I get you out of bed and back into his life.

Shuri had nothing to say to this, shame ran hot through her face. She moved her hand from your thigh and sunk more into the floor. As you finished the last twist you started to feel bad about your response but she was the one who asked.

“Shuri.” You spoke her name lightly, leaving the conversation like that felt wrong.

“Hmm?” You took down the last section of her hair and started combing, repeating the process for the final time.

“Of course I missed you. I spent six whole months in the states missing you. So consumed with my want to be with you I couldn’t do anything but cry and sleep.” You separated the last section and started twisting. “But after six months, Shuri, I had to ask myself what was I missing. Was I missing the dates you stood me up on? The nights I went to bed alone while you were in the lab tinkering away with your latest technological development? That couldn’t be what had me throwing my life away. So I stopped missing you.” By the time you finished speaking you had finished the last twist, letting it plop down on her face.

Shuri nodded her head, there was nothing she could say. You were right, Shuri hadn’t treated you the way she should during the final year of your relationship.

You grabbed the silk scarf from next to you and wrapped it around Shuri’s head. The words you wanted to say to her blossomed in your mind. “But I do miss you, I miss when it was simple and just us.” Even so, you kept them to yourself.

You tapped Shuri’s shoulder and she stood from between your legs, giving you the space to stand up and stretch. You looked at the clock on the table and the time read 11 PM. Shuri followed your eyes and sighed knowing her time with you for the day was nearing a close. You smiled at her sigh and you turned to start removing objects from the bed to give Shuri a clear place to sleep. She walked over to the bed and pulled back the covers, looking back at you as you nodded signifying that you were serious about her sleeping. Shuri slipped under the covers and watched as you walked over to her.

You sat on the edge of her bed and placed your inside hand on Shuri’s cheek, she melted into your touch and placed her hand on top of yours. You leaned over and placed a kiss on her forehead.

“Goodnight Shuri.” You removed your hand from her face and stood from the bed. Shuri caught your hand before you could leave.

“Stay? Stay with me tonight?” Your breath caught as you thought about her words.

“Okay.”

TAGLIST:

@vevethirst @angelsmist @coalmistyy @eriksjournal @avsphroeg @nil-eena @zane2408 @homie0sapien @noneofyabuisnezs @ilacknames @rotten-toenails @starrknessblog @adaya08 @bigbigbigfan @cour1ne7 @gaspyghosttt @gardenofshuri @chrome-edition @londyn-loves-u @shuri-my-love @trixielwt @arielna2805 @syupakingcowbaby @luxuriouslokistan-3 @shuriswift @raydestin @liv444me @aphroditeisamilf @blkmystery @bestfriend491

#shuri x y/n #shuri x reader #shuri black panther #shuri imagine #shuri udaku #shuri fanfiction #shuri x you #black panther #black panther fanfiction #black panther imagine #black panther fic #black panther fandom #letitia wright #jc writes

495 notes · View notes

iamthat-iam · 8 months

Note

Hi Bry ("Bry" 🤔 lol you know), I hope you're having a lovely day! Thanks for your patience with me as I always send a thousand questions haha 💀 I wanted to send this one over asks in case anyone else is wondering about it. No worries about getting to this ask if you can't, I know you probably have a bajillion and I am grateful for your time!

I wanted to ask you a question related to something I see ND blogs talking about a lot, related to the ego's desires (don't worry, this is NOT a manifestation related question but rather a clarification question on ego vs Self). I see a lot of ND bloggers talking about how once you drop the ego and realize Self you can then experience anything and everything you want and dream any beautiful dream because you know that you are everything and are absolutely, 100% limitless. But the phrase, "anything and everything you want" is a confusing phrase to me, because Self doesn't have any preference towards the ego's desires and instead feels lovingly neutral and blissful towards everything, including suffering. So then why do people say you can have everything "you want" once you recognize Self in reference to becoming aware of the ego's desires? Even the idea of changing the channel if "you" don't like the show you're watching, that's still the ego wanting to be free of itself and not liking the show. So why would Self ever want to change the channel once it has been realized, or, why would Self want to dream a specific dream if it has no preference towards that dream?

My interpretation of it is that once you realize you are the lovely, limitless Self, manifesting the ego's desires for the ego's enjoyment is just a bonus FOR the ego. You (as self) have the power to give the ego that You used to identify with anything it wants. This is because You absolutely love Your creation (the character You used to be identified as), because Self loves all of Its creations, and it is fun to give the sweet character You've been playing the gift of everything it wants, because it's fun to love it up. Or maybe You as Self want to give the ego a little boost of everything it wants before identifying with it again, because it's all part of the fun game of awareness and getting lost in the play. These are the answers I've come to myself, but I wanted to ask another person to see if they had a different interpretation.

I guess what the question boils down to is this: why would one want to "become aware of a different channel/dream/ego/character" once you realize Self, if Self is lovingly neutral towards it all? Isn't that just re-identification with the ego? Ultimately I know it comes down to love and fun and enjoying the play and I should probably just relax and have fun haha, but this definitely has confused me a little when I see ND bloggers talking about it. Maybe it's just because a lot of us come from LOA and that's where the need to address it comes from. But yeah! Was just curious what you think about this.

Anyway! I hope this makes sense, it's a little hard to put into words but I am hoping it is clear this isn't a manifestation question and more a question of clarification question haha. Thanks for your time and energy and I hope you are doing so, so wonderfully!

Hi "Bunny"! 💙

So it seems that we have similar interpretations. The Self has so much love for it's creations so why not give them all better circumstances to live under?

The Self wanted to experience life in all sorts of ways possible, including the suffering aspect, and it's done it, billions of times. The goal has already been accomplished right?

Now that you are awake and you aren't attached to anything that is going on because it isn't you, the illusion is gone. You no longer think that it's you going through circumstances. The game is pretty much over. You won 😂 At some point you go, "well that was fun. Time for me to do something different."

So it's not exactly changing everything so the ego is satisfied, it's more like, "well... What more is there to do here?" If you DID choose to create a new dream or change the channel. You do it because you can.

#non dualism #nondualism #consciousness

93 notes · View notes

vbecker10 · 1 year

Note

Hey first sorry if it written weirdly, english isn't ny first lenguage, I saw you had your requests open and wanted to ask of course loki x reader where reader is some broke artist painting/drawing people on the streets and meets loki while he passed by or something like that, thats all, pretty vague, I like your writting, and hope you enjoy your day/evening/night

I'm sorry this took so long, I've been really really behind in my asks but I'm trying to catch up so I can open them again soon. Please, never apologize for your English, I'm always impressed by people who know more than one language! 😊 I honestly love this request, hope you like it cause it sorta ran away from me lol! 💚

The Gift

Pairing: Loki x female reader

Warnings: none... literally not a single one lol, I'm in a fluffy mood so enjoy

Summary: You are an artist who paints portraits for tourists in the park near Stark Tower, the same park Loki has started to frequent during his free time. Loki and you begin talking one day after he catches you drawing him when you are between customers. A few days later, he surprises you with a gift and you decide to return the favor.

Dividers by: @harlequin-hangout

You sift through the colored pencils in your case for the right type of green before looking back at the open field in front of you. His coat is a deeper green than the grass he is resting on and the leaves above him have started to turn various shades of red and orange. You pause before putting the sharpened tip to the canvas, you had already sketched the God of Mischief into your drawing but you could easily color over him. You had never included a person in one of your private drawings before, even when the park was full of people you would leave them out of the final images.

Loki sits with his back against one of the trees lining the open field, his long legs stretched out in front of him. His thick coat is open, revealing a black dress shirt with the top two buttons left undone. He licks one of his fingers before flipping the page of his book, his eyes never looking away from the pages. Over the last month, you've seen Loki come to that spot every afternoon for an hour or two with a different book each time.

You shake your head lightly then decide to shade in Loki's dark green peacoat before adding more detail to his face, trying to capture his sharp features accurately. He came here so often he was practically a part of the park, you reasoned with yourself. Besides, he would never know, you think as you reach for another color.

You continue to work, looking up occasionally to check your reference. Loki sits almost perfectly still, as if he knows you are trying to capture his likeness but you hope your brief glances are not noticeable to the god. You put the black pencil down and gently blow any loose dust from the canvas before reviewing the finished piece with a self-satisfied grin. A breeze sweeps through the park and you lift your head from your work, looking across the field to see that Loki is suddenly gone. You lean back on your stool, turning your attention to cleaning your supplies when a deep voice behind you makes you jump.

"That's quite impressive," he says as he looks over your shoulder.

You turn quickly to face him, nearly knocking over your easel in the process. "Oh, I- I'm sorry. This is really weird right?" you ask but you continue, giving him no chance to answer. "I was just trying to keep myself occupied since there aren't many tourists around here today. I only meant to draw the field and trees but... I added you because you're always here. Not that I'm watching you, I just notice who is around cause I'm here all the time, too. I'm sorry, I know I should have asked you if it was ok before I started to draw you but you looked so lost in your book, I didn't want to bother you."

Loki chuckles at your rambling apology and says, "It's fine, no harm done."

You swallow nervously as he reaches into his coat pocket then you realize he is taking out his wallet. He gestures towards the sign in front of the easel and asks, "I only see prices for your portraits. How much for this one?"

"Uh..." you think for a moment, surprised by his offer. You typically charged $20 for a painting of one person and $10 for every additional person but you never sold your landscapes. They weren't for the tourists, they were for you.

"Your portraits are usually far smaller than this so I assume it might be a bit higher in price," he says. He wasn't wrong, the canvas you had been working on was roughly twice the size of what you typically sold. You felt a bit surprised that he knew so much about the paintings you created but you had been watching him so you assumed it was only fair he had kept an eye on you as well.

"I don't know, I never intended to sell this but..." you pause then smile at him. "You can have it," you tell him and he tilts his head slightly. "As a gift, I mean," you add quickly.

He shakes his head, "I appreciate the offer but I couldn't do that. It's clear you have a talent for landscapes and put a great deal of effort into this. The coloring and details are extremely well done for having been finished in such a short amount of time."

A wave of pride washes over you, no one has ever complimented your artwork to this extent before. You start to thank him but his phone begins to ring and you stifle a laugh when he groans in annoyance. He excuses himself, taking a few steps away from you to answer it privately. He runs his fingers through his long black hair and you can't help but wonder if he would be willing to sit for a portrait. It was easy to admit Loki was extraordinarily handsome and you wouldn't pass up the opportunity to observe him closely for an extended period of time.

He hangs up several minutes later, his smile gone but it quickly reappears when you ask if he is ok. He nods, "There is a meeting I need to attend shortly, apologies for not being able to stay for much longer. I would really love to have this for my study, though. Do you think $50 would be fair?" He takes the cash out of his leather wallet before waiting for an answer.

"I- that's too much, Loki," you tell him but he hands you the money.

"I insist," he says, not allowing you any space to argue. He then says, "Although I do seem to be at a slight disadvantage." You look at him curiously as you tuck the money into your small lock box. "You know my name, but I don't know yours," he says with a smirk.

"Oh, I'm Y/N," you answer, putting out your hand as if expecting a handshake, internally cringing.

He chuckles and takes your hand, instead of shaking it however, he brings the back of your hand to his lips and kisses it lightly. "It was a pleasure to finally speak with you Y/N. I will see you tomorrow," he says and you can't help but blush intensely as a giggle escapes you.

The next afternoon you look up from your easel as Loki walks down the path towards you, a book in his left hand. You wave a bit more enthusiastically then you meant to and he smiled broadly, waving in response before heading towards his usual spot. Your attention shifts back to the two children sitting across from you and the painting you had started. You find yourself having to resist the urge to glance over at Loki while you try to focus on the task at hand.

After finally completing the painting, the father of the two children pays you and the family walks off into the park. You begin to clean your brushes, lost in thought when a now familiar voice causes you to look up.

"Hello again," Loki says as he sets himself down on one of the unoccupied stools.

"Hi," you reply, putting your brushes back in the case until you need them again. "I'm glad you came over, I wanted to thank you again for yesterday. You really didn't have to buy it."

"Nonsense," he waves off your concern. "I told you, it was an exquisite piece and I honestly can not stand the blank walls in my study."

You can barely believe he called your work exquisite. Most people were happy enough with your portraits to give you a few dollars extra as a tip but you rarely received any real compliments.

"I have a question for you," he says and you look up from the supplies you are organizing. "I am curious, would I be able to see some of your work?"

You think for a moment, biting your lip before you answer. If it had been anyone else you would have instantly said no but Loki seemed to genuinely be interested in your work. "Sure if you want to but... most of the pieces I've painted are at my apartment. I only have my sketch pad with me," you tell him, hoping he won't be too disappointed.

Instead of answering, he simply picks up the stool he was sitting on and places it next to you with a smile. You swallow nervously and hand him your sketch book, not sure if you want to watch him look through your work or not. He opens it to the first page and you hold your breath as you watch his fingers run along the edge of the paper. Loki examines the first page for a few moments then turns the page wordlessly, you can barely read the expression on his face. You bite your lip again, crossing your arms in anticipation of him saying something, anything.

When Loki is halfway through the book, he comes to a sketch you made of Stark Tower looming over the trees of the park at dusk. "These are amazing, Y/N," he says, not taking his eyes off the page and you feel like bursting with delight. He turns to the next page and says, "This one-" but he is cut off by his phone ringing. "I'm so sorry, please excuse me," he hands you the sketch book and answers his phone.

You watch him pace back and forth along the path, his head down as he kicks a small rock lightly. A few minutes later he walks back to where you are sitting and you can tell he had bad news. "Do you have to leave already?" you ask, the disappointment more obvious in your voice than you expected.

He gives you a half smile, "I do unfortunately but thank you for sharing these with me. You truly are quite talented, Y/N."

"Thanks Loki," you look down, running your hand over the cover of your book.

"I will see you tomorrow," he says hopefully and you nod with a smile.

The next day Loki arrives at the park just as a large group of tourists make their way over to you. Normally you would be thrilled by the crowd since it means a large pay day but all you want to do is have them leave so you can talk to Loki. When you finish painting the first couple, you glance briefly towards Loki's spot and blush when you realize he is watching you. You look back to your canvas quickly and greet your next customers with a smile as they sit down.

After what feels like forever, you finally finish the last painting and the group leaves. You instantly look for Loki and see him getting up. You get to work cleaning your brushes and closing up your paints while he walks over to you. "Hello darling," Loki says.

"Hi," you reply, unable to contain a short giggle at the new pet name. Before you can overthink why he would call you that, he sits across from you just as he had yesterday but this time you notice he is holding two books.

"I have something for you," he says.

"Really?" you ask surprised. He chuckles and nods, holding out the larger of the two books for you to take. "Loki, what...?" you look down at the cover, unable to read the title.

He picks up the stool and sits next to you, much closer then the day before. "I'm sorry it's written in Asgardian but the drawings are what I wanted you to see," he tells you. He opens the book, holding it between the both of you. He flips past the first few pages of text and without looking at you says, "I was looking through this yesterday and it reminded me of you."

Your heart nearly stops when he tells you that and you quickly cover your face to hide the blush that is spreading across your cheeks. He turns one more page then stops and you can see why Loki wanted to show you this. "It's beautiful," you say quietly as you look at the colored drawing.

"This is a book about the palace gardens on Asgard," he explains without looking up. "This was one of my favorite places to read when I was younger." You can see why Loki chose this spot in the park, it looked similar to the small field lined with tall trees. Viney plants grew up the trucks of the trees and wildflowers were scattered through the grass.

He flips to the next page and shakes his head as he laughs, "This maze would rearrange itself. Thor and I spent quite a lot of time lost here."

He continues to show you page after page of the various sections of the gardens, pointing out things he missed or thought you would find interesting. You were in awe of the beauty and vastness of the gardens but you couldn't stop looking at Loki when he spoke. He never looked up from the pages, grinning and laughing at the numerous memories until he turned to the last image.

He looks away for a moment and you aren't sure what expression he is hiding. When he looks back at you, he smiles but you can see his eyes are slightly red. He clears his throat and touches the page lightly, bringing your attention back to the book. "This was my mother's favorite part of the gardens," he says just above a whisper.

You place your hand over his, squeezing it lightly and he continues to force a smile. "She's been gone for a few years now but..." he stops himself.

"You still miss her?" you ask him.

He nods, "Every day." You raise your hand to his cheek and wipe away a stray tear that falls. "I'm sorry, I- this was supposed to be a fun gift," he tries to joke.

"I love it, Loki," you tell him honestly. "Thank you so much."

He smiles a bit wider and just as he begins to say something his phone rings. "I should snap this ridiculous thing in half," he groans and you laugh.

"If you break it, I can't give you my number," you say without thinking and his face changes in an instant.

"You, my dear, make an excellent point," he smirks. "Excuse me a moment." He gets up and wanders a few steps away while you go back to the book. You flip slowly through it again but stop when you reach the last page. The garden was incredible, a rough stone path wound around multicolored rose bushes and a single stone bench sat across from a small pond in the center. You could see why Loki's mother would have loved it.

Loki walks back towards you and you close the book, holding it tightly. "Is something wrong?" you ask him.

His smile is gone and he looks at you with a serious expression. "I need to leave for a few days, four at the most I'm told," he tells you and you feel your stomach drop. You stand up, setting the book carefully on your stool.

"Promise me you'll be careful," you insist, suddenly filled with worry.

"I will, darling," he replies. He offers you his phone, "I most likely won't be able to text while I am on the mission but I can let you know when I'm back if... if you would like that?" He sounds hesitant but you quickly take his phone and add your information.

"I want to know the minute you're back safe," you say, handing him back his phone.

He smiles, "I promise."

"Good," you nod before you find yourself hugging him tightly. Your brain freezes for a moment in panic but then he wraps his arms around you and your body relaxes.

"I will be back as soon as I can," he promises you as he lets go slowly.

You take a seat at your easel and busy yourself with organizing your supplies as you force yourself to not watch him walk away.

You hang your keys on the hook and place your supplies on the small end table, closing the door as your phone beeps. You take it out of your pocket and answer it quickly.

"Hi Loki," you say excitedly, it had been four days since Loki left and you missed him more then you thought you would. You couldn't help but wonder if he missed you too.

"Hello, Y/N," he replies, you can hear other people taking loudly in the background. "I just wanted to let you know I'm on my way back. We should be landing in about half an hour."

"Oh good," you say in response, not quite ready to tell him you had been hoping every call and text you received over the last few days was him. "I imagine you must be ready to get home and rest."

He chuckles, "Honestly, I'm more hungry then anything else. The food SHIELD provides during missions is... describing it as miserable would be being kind."

You laugh then suggest, "You should come over, I'm just getting ready to cook dinner." Your heart jumps into your throat, did you really just invite him over, your brain yells.

"I would love to," he answers without any hesitation.

You laugh a bit nervously then give Loki your address. He tells you he can be there in an hour. "Great, I'm going to go so I can get everything ready. I'll see you soon," you tell him, hoping he can't hear how nervous you feel.

You run into the kitchen thankful you had bought groceries yesterday. You open the fridge and freezer then decide to cook something simple, now might not be the best time to take risks and get fancy you think to yourself. After settling on a meal that will only take half an hour, you quickly get to work tidying up your apartment. It was by no means messy but you want to make a good impression. Especially if this is a date, you think, but it's not a date.

You turn around in the middle of your small apartment and sigh, it's as good as it's going to get. Now time to make it look like you haven't been sitting in the park all day, which is the only way he had ever seen you. You toss your paint covered pants and shirt into the hamper and take the fastest shower of your life. After drying off you realize you need to start cooking.

You throw on your favorite jeans and put your hair up. Standing in front of your closest you slide the hangers back and forth, knowing you need to just pick a shirt. You reach in and grab one, pulling it on as you walk into the hallway. You finish prepping everything and place the food in the oven, setting the timer for twenty minutes. Opening the cabinet next to the fridge, you pull out the dishes and glasses so you can begin setting the table.

You should put out candles, you think, but you don't because that's for a date and this is not a date. The doorbell rings, interrupting your internal debate and your heart races. You take a quick glance at yourself in the mirror by the door and freeze when you see the shirt you picked out. No, you realize, without thinking you had put on literally the only green shirt you owned. And it wasn't just any green, it was the same deep emerald green that Loki wore all the time.

You cringe, knowing you don't have enough time to change so you take a deep breath and hope he doesn't think it's weird. You open the door and he smiles warmly at you. "Hello darling," he says as you take a step back to let him him.

"Hi Loki, I'm glad you could come over," you say as he takes off his coat. He was wearing a dark gray button up shirt with the first few buttons open.

"Thank you for inviting me," he says as he unbuttons his shirt cuffs and rolls up his sleeves. "I must say, that color looks lovely on you."

You blush at the compliment and before you can reply the timer goes off. "Dinner will be ready in a few minutes, I just need to finish up one more thing," you tell him as you head towards the kitchen.

"Do you need help?" he asks.

"No, I've got it, but if you want..." you walk back to him. "I um... most of my paintings are in there," you point down the hall towards your living area.

After you set the food on the table you go into the living area to tell Loki it was ready. He is standing in front of your favorite painting, it was the first piece you did when you moved to New York City. His arms are crossed but you see a slight smile on his lips, he looks as if he is studying a famous painting at a museum.

"Dinners ready," you tell him, interrupting his thoughts. The two of you talk and joke all throughout dinner. You still weren't sure if he would consider this a date but you didn't care anymore. You had never had this much fun just talking to someone.

After dinner Loki says, "Thank you Y/N, that was the best meal I've had in months." You smile as you get up to clear the plates. "Let me take care of this," he insists, taking your plate from you.

"Are you sure? You don't have to do that," you tell him.

"Don't worry," he smirks, "It'll only take a minute." You look at him curiously and then with a flick of his wrist a green glow surrounds all your dishes, pans and utensils. In an instant they are all clean and stacked neatly on the counter.

You look at him, blinking slowly then say, "You are invited for dinner all the time."

He laughs, "I hope that is because you find me charming and not because I can clean efficiently."

"Is it ok if it's because of both reasons?" you joke. "Oh... I have something for you. I was going to bring it by the Tower after you got back but you're here so..." you say as you walk quickly down the hall to your bedroom.

"Am I supposed to follow you?" he asks clearly confused.

"No, I'll be right back," you tell from your room. You wall excitedly back to the dining area with a large, flat box in your arms.

"What is this?" he asks when you set it on the table and take a step back.

"Open it," you respond nervously. You can feel your heart pounding in your chest, hoping that he will like it.

He opens the side of the box and slides out the canvas slowly, you bite you lip as you watch his expression change. His smile vanishes and his eyes widen as you holds the painting out in front of him. You suddenly fear you've made a mistake but then he turns to face you.

"Y/N," he says quietly, "This is... this is my mother's garden."

You nod, "Is it ok?"

"Ok?" he repeats and you shrug. "Y/N, this is beautiful. I have never received a gift this thoughtful. I- I cannot thank you enough for this," he says.

You smile, thrilled by his reaction. "I'm glad you like it," you tell him as he sets it carefully on the table.

He walks over to you, "I love it Y/N."

He puts one arm around your waist, pulling you close to him and you look up, your eyes meeting his. He touches your cheek lightly with his other hand and you wrap your arms around him. You are sure he can feel your heart beating out of your chest as he smiles at you. He leans down slowly, closing the distance between your lips and his.

When he pulls back a few moments later he says, "I wasn't sure if you meant for tonight to be a date or not but, I would love to take you out Friday night."

You giggle, "I wasn't sure either but I think I'm going to count it now."

He laughs, "Very well, then I would like to take you out on our second date, maybe to one of my favorite museums."

"I would really like," you tell him and he leans down to kiss you again.

Please let me know if you want to be added or taken off the tag list 💚💚

@michelleleewise @soubi001 @ace-of-gay @misunderstoodself @coldnique @lokiprompts @thomase1 @mochie85 @fi-recs-fics @huntress-artemiss @sititran @xorpsbane @kkdvkyya @lokisgoodgirl @harlequin-hangout @muddyorbs @holdmytesseract @kats72 @avoliax @peaches1958 @peachyjinx @loopsisloops @unabashed-lover-of-fictional-men @high-functioning-lokipath @psychospore @dukes2581 @buttercupcookies-blog @animnerd @lokiswife-dark-fox-queen @laufeyson-16 @loki-laufeyson-1054 @pics-and-fanfics @coffeeorsomething-irl @crimson25 @simping-for-marvel @slytherclaw1227 @lokixryss @lokidokieokie @unlucky-number-13 @asuni921 @currish-rosewolfe @elizabethmidnight2017 @ijuststareatstuffhereok89 @sunshineangel-reads @eleniblue

Likes, comments and reblogs are always appreciated 💚💚

310 notes · View notes

thenukacolachallenge · 5 months

Text

some fun facts about Luis and André Peña(his VA) Part Two: Electric Boogaloo

okay so i did one of these that was just from the Nick Apostolides streams(minus the Separate Ways DLC stream(s), THOUGH I DO WANNA WATCH THAT), but now i'm going through other videos of streams and finding out even more stuff that i wanna talk about lol sooooo... PART TWO BABEY

this all is from Twitch Streamer Peralt's charity stream for JDRF UK, in which André is a guest on! it's a fun watch, i recommend the whole video tbh, André gives out a lot of useful life and acting advice and the vibe is just lots of fun. but, these posts are primarily for stuff related to Luis, which is what i'll be cataloguing!

NOW WITH TIMESTAMPS BY REQUEST!

-André considers the role of Luis to be more than just voice acting, more of just full-on acting, since he also did his motion capture, which i find very interesting. i always love hearing the BTS processes of things i enjoy and that's such a cool fact. i'm sure most people know that he did mocap for Luis already, but I like that André doesn't consider his performance as Luis very different from a regular acting role. (timestamp)

-André took the more cheerful aspects of Luis from his own personality. He mentions that he's a relatively happy person himself, but that happiness comes from knowing darkness, and that was just something that he kind of naturally transferred over to Luis, considering Luis's backstory itself is so dark. One of the first things that drew me to Luis in this game was his goofy behavior in a terrifying situation, so i'm thankful for it! (timestamp)

-André also gives a lot of interesting BTS with pointing out the differences in acting mocap vs stage vs onscreen acting. it's not related to Luis per se outside of his relation to André, but it is SUPER fascinating, and you can tell André is really passionate about acting and it makes me appreciate his performance all the more. I can't wait to see him in new roles! (timestamp)

-When asked if there was anything from OG Luis that André took with him as character inspiration/canonicity/whatever else, he mentioned that he tried to take mostly the essence of Rino Romano's voice and mannerisms, and tried to emulate all of that without it being in "bad taste"(in reference to OG Luis being kind of gross toward women), and kind of added more quirkiness as more of his own spin on it. personally i think he did a great job; Luis is still very much a flirt, but he comes across as less of a creep and more just a harmless flirty goofball, which i think threads the needle really well for him as a character! (timestamp)

-(not related to Luis, but André is very adamant that the S in Leon S. Kennedy stands for Sancho, not Scott, which makes me giggle) (timestamp)

-André picked up smoking(again) for the role of Luis! it was also how he practiced Luis's lighter trick(which he clarifies is referred to as 'lighter juggling'); every time he'd have a cig, he made it so he had to do the tricks before he could light it. One of the tricks is called "the Infinity", where you flip the lighter through your fingers in a continuous motion, and there's one where you toss the lighter in the air, and close it as you catch it. He was a smoker growing up, he had stopped, he picked up the habit again for Luis, and then threw his cigs out the second he finished his final scene as Luis. He also clarifies NOT to smoke; he is able to start and stop smoking fairly easily, but that is not the case for most people. As a former smoker myself, i agree: if you dont already smoke, don't pick it up! don't pick up vaping either please!!! (timestamp)

-not related to Luis, but André talks a bit with Peralt(the streamer) about self-defense, martial arts, and alcohol. He tells a story about how he got jumped in a bar by a drunk guy and how his background in self-defense helped there, and talks about the effects of excess alcohol consumption. i keep repeating this, but the stream is a really good one, and i highly recommend watching it yourself! (timestamp)

-Someone asked what André thinks about the Luis and Leon shipping, and I really like his answer. He starts off by clarifying that everyone is allowed to have their headcanons, and there's nothing wrong with shipping in general, and to ship whatever you like. However, for André himself, he used the model of how he and his brother interact for how Luis interacts with Leon. He likes to goad his brother, who he describes as "a hothead" and "like Leon", and so he transferred a lot of that energy into Luis goading and teasing Leon. He played Luis as realizing that he and Leon are stuck together, and he knows Leon won't do anything to really harm Luis, so he put a lot of energy into basically razzing him like one would a sibling. He also finished by once again clarifying that people are allowed to do whatever they want in their own headcanon lol. (some people do get really upset about that stuff!) (timestamp)

-as a quick aside to the above conversation, André mentions that Luis cares SO MUCH about Ashley. When it comes to Leon, Luis is, in André's own words, "a dick to him". Ashley, to Luis, is "pure" - the one thing in the entire scenario that has no business being in this place. With Leon, Luis knows from his uptight demeanor, that he's been through hell before - this guy is stuck with him, in hell, for better or worse. But Ashley is innocent, dragged into this to be a pawn of Saddler's. So he's most concerned with Ashley's safety overall, and André tried to really push that concern and care in his performance. i think it really shows, especially in the scene after the cabin standoff, where Ashley coughs up blood and Luis immediately realizes that she's been infected, and he has to save her. (timestamp)

-During Luis' scene in the vanilla game with Ada(not Separate Ways scenes, although i think this scene is in the dlc too?), André confirms that Luis telling Ada "you should be telling me what a good job i did" is just him trying to make up an excuse of sorts for not having the Amber on him. Small detail, but one i like! (timestamp)

-André once more affirms that Luis is a cat person! He also specifically states, again, that he'd probably start off as not a pet person, but he'd probably get adopted by a stray cat, who he'd leave out food for but eventually let into his home, and that'd begin his love for cats. He also mentions that actors have to think about things like this, to flesh out their characters, which makes me wonder what other headcanons he has for Luis! (tbf tho, i've been wondering this since i watched André's unboxing of the Luis jacket he got commissioned for cosplay, and he mentioned that Luis loves spice) (timestamp)

-in the end, the stream raised a bit shy of 1k for the charity JDRF, which is super awesome!!!! i am several months late but congrats to Peralt's community for making that happen!!!

that was all i managed to find out about Luis specifically, but if i missed anything, feel free to add on in a comment! sometimes it's hard to hear with so many people talking and so much going on, but i'm enjoying learning about Luis outside of the game itself like this :D i'm planning on watching André's streams, the rest of Nick's streams, Nicole Tompkins'(Jill Valentine's VA) streams with André as a guest, and anymore i can find, so if i mind out more stuff about Luis from these vids, yall can expect more of these hahaha!

#luis serra #luis serra navarro

54 notes · View notes

waitmyturtles · 7 months

Text

THE MORNING AFTER: ONLY FRIENDS, EPISODE 7 ("YOU GOT TO KNOW WHEN TO HOLD 'EM / KNOW WHEN TO FOLD 'EM") EDITION

Whew, baby. Well, I found this episode particularly brutal.

I've been noodling this week on the following theme: the mundanity of toxicity. The everyday-ness of bad in people. I think this episode captured this well (cc @lurkingshan, @neuroticbookworm, and @bengiyo, who all got a little preview of this thinking).

But I caught some other themes in this episode, too, which I'll quickly hit and list:

2) The elements of life, and 3) Gambling.

As a devoted meta writer, writing about Only Friends is hard. Because: I want to think that there's a lot more to what I'm seeing. I am certainly missing cinematic references that Jojo and team are making (I haven't watched Queer As Folk, for instance). Mew's face popping out of the bathtub? That has me wondering if I'm missing a cinematic reference there.

But at the same time, I wonder if by just observing the Only Friends crew, that I'm picking up on enough. When I was in my twenties, living in New York City, going to college...I was still trying to figure people out. I was absolutely SURROUNDED by people, and I couldn't help but think, everyday -- what is it that makes these people tick?

And I found myself regularly shocked at how mean people were. Very often, I'd just be like -- what the actual fuck, why are you trying so hard to be a massive dick? And, who knows -- maybe people were thinking the same thing about me.

That was when I was young. I just -- I didn't know that much about people. Really, what I didn't know -- and what I really NEEDED to know, and what I learned about myself in that decade and the next -- was how to manage myself around anybody, so as to preserve myself from any unpredictable pain that might come from someone else. In other words... I needed to fucking grow up.

Part of that self-management was trying on identities. Could I fake being a stronger person? Sure, I definitely tried. I tried with clothes, with new slang, with trying new activities, with drinking. That's just normal for a lass in their twenties.

The Only Friends crew -- they are assholes. Many of them were trying on change a couple of weeks ago. Mew experienced a HUGE identity shift during this episode.

But what they all embody to me, in this moment in their lives, is a kind of everyday toxicity -- a self-absorbed perspective, so tunneled internally into each and every one of them, that none of them are realizing that the energy they put out is colliding and having effects on others.

Like -- it's kind of shocking and twisted to watch. But when I think about it, when I remember what it was like to be in a huge city and to be in college and post-college: there's a part of me that remembers being CONSTANTLY surprised that people were just massive jerks, everyday, and again, who knows -- I think people likely thought that I was a jerk, too, for thinking of myself and leading myself with my life.

People, most people, grow out of these stages, as they get older, get more experienced in their years, maybe get more political in their dealings with others. I can't condemn this group of university students fully, as I hold hope (I'm a mom, damn it) that they'll grow into more fully robust and empathic people. But they ain't there yet. I'm not sure my turning stones gives me more insight to them than in relating to my own experiences as a former twentysomething. It has me thinking, as someone who loves turning those stones in my beloved dramas.

That all being said. Those two other themes in this episode have me thinking -- the elements of life and gambling.

We saw Mew play with fire (fucking finally, my man). And we saw lots of water -- water in the pool, water in the tub with Sand and Ray.

Water puts out fire. Mew tries to fake-drown (lol) Boston in the pool. Later on, Mew lets Boston know that he (Mew) can take Boston down, but won't. Mew is trying to control the fires that he's lit, and the ones that have already been burning.

My question to Mew is: do you know how to do what you are doing, or what you want to do?

I don't quite think so, and I think that "Welcome to Las Vegas" shirt he was wearing at Boston's house indicated as much.

(Uh, first of all, chain life, Book! MORE, MORE!)

Mew has decided to become a gambler. Let's think of all the metaphors! Mew has decided to roll the dice and possibly move past the pass line. He's decided to play his odds. He even STACKED his odds -- going to a new gay bar, enticing Drake Gap, going back to Gap's place, stealing the sex tape from Gap's computer, threatening Gap with reporting him for a crime, going to BOSTON'S HOUSE, TALKING TO BOSTON'S DAD, showing Boston the copy of the sex tape, THREATENING BOSTON, MAKING BOSTON BEG, showing MORAL SUPERIORITY OVER BOSTON, throwing the flash drive at Boston, and walking away. Like, if that were a metaphor for actually playing craps, first of all, lol, the pit guy would check Mew's ID, get him a players' card, and encourage him to move to the high limits room, being like, WHAT is this motherfucker DOING, but we want him doing more of it, he'll make us more money -- once he starts fucking things up.

Mew's trying on a new identity. He already was on the road to it, getting that LASIK for Top. He's just continuing to move forward with it. He's going to play with nastiness, but still try to come out on Top.

Trying on new identities. It is so normal when you're young -- I did that. Trying on what fits for whatever reason you are feeling at that moment -- if you're rebounding, if you're healing, if you're bored. Mew is embarrassed, maybe even ashamed, maybe even regretful that his first relationship ended up as a failure.

And now he's figuring out how to recover -- by taking a gamble, and playing with the exact same mundane, everyday nastiness that he's seen in everyone around him.

P.S. Ephemerality and permanence? That fire burned the memory that Top tried to create with Mew (cc @twig-tea and @lurkingshan here). And, gambling? SO ephemeral. Buh-bye, money and pride. Ray switching back and forth between Mew and Sand? Ephemeral crushitude. (SAND. SMDH. I KNOW RAY'S DAD SAID SOMETHING TO YOU, BUT STILL, SMDH.) Nick turning on Boston. Boston begging Mew to hold back on the permanent impact of the sex tape on Boston's dad's career.

And the ephemerality of movement: the clothes in this episode said it all. Las Vegas, NYC, Stanford. These young folks can just... disappear if they want to. And they just might.

(G'DAY, EPHEMERALITY SQUAD! @ranchthoughts @slayerkitty @distant-screaming @twig-tea @neuroticbookworm @lurkingshan @clara-maybe-ontheroad @thatgirl4815 @chickenstrangers @wen-kexing-apologist)

79 notes · View notes