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#oh tumblr you son of a bitch
dootznbootz · 5 days
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Hi. I'm cyberbullying a long dead poet because of his shitty fanfic. Enjoy. I'd love it if you joined me.
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(Before you get mad at me, yes, I know Eugammon of Cyrene is an important figure and all that. I'm sick with some sort of flu. Let me cyberbully an ancient dead fanfic writer in peace.)
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drbansick · 2 years
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🅱️ictor 🅱️rankenstein
I hate this pathetic little wet sock /j
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catboygretzky · 25 days
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Exyblr Dashboard Simulator based on what I personally see on sportsblr:
1/?
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👑 girlbossriko follow
how many bro jobs do you think it took before riko moriyama and kevin day realized that uh.....maybe this wasn't just a bro thing
👢exyinaphonebooth follow
how many times do they have to come out and say they're like brothers before you freakos stop shipping them
👑 girlbossriko follow
????? do i know u
#it's a tumblr post about two exy players that you'lll never meet in your life it really isn't that deep
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💃fox-me-up follow
ngl that newest fox is kinda 👀
#psu lb #exy lb
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👨🏻‍❤️‍💋‍👨🏻 talk-exy-to-me
The NARRATIVE that kevin day and neil josten have........son of exy! scouting the rookie-est of rookies from fuck knows arizona........no listen you dont GET IT winning is EVERYTHING TO KEVIN and he would risk it on the foxes? And NEIL? who has only played exy for a year! NEIL Gets his attention!!!!! And hes good and he's getting better every game and he keeps bitching about kevin's ex on live tv BUT WAIT!???? NOT QUITE WHAT YOU EXPECT! Bc then neil shows up with a number on his cheek BECAUSE WELL it turns out they've known each other since they were KIDS! how is everyone not insane w me THEY'RE LITERALLY PERFECT
#where r my fellow njkd truthers #how r u all not here with me this isnt even the start #kevneil #210 #psu #njkd
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☀️ usctrojanny
every smiley blonde striker (jeremy knox) needs a brunette wet cat emotional support backliner (jean moreau)
#jerejean #usc trojans #i'm just saying 🤷‍♀️
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👸🏻 kevindazed follow
did he just......
👸🏻 kevindazed follow
guys please tell me i'm not insane
👸🏻 kevindazed follow
HE'S NEVER BEEN????? SKIIING???? KEVIN WHAT DOES THAT MEAN ?????? KEVIN PLEASE
#i i'm going insane i will literally die if someone doesn't explain this to me HE'S NEVER BEEN SKIING?!!!!
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🧚 goalie-stan
oh....i'm feeling so weak......it'd sure be nice to have a big strong goalie (renee walker) hold me up (renee if you're free on tuesday i am also free on tuesday.........on tuesday this tuesday, any tuesday?)
#literally passing out just thinking about her holding me don't call don't text i'm busy
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🌄 softkevinday follow
do u think if u offered kevin day essential oils to heal his hand he'd beat you to death
#it'd be hard for him bc he only has one hand but he could probably do it #legally this is a joke don't do this
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🗣️ jeremyknoxes follow
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feeling normal
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📜 realexyblog
actually exy rpf is fine, i asked kayleigh day herself and she told me it was fine
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🐋 sexyexy
'exy is a stupid name for a sport' have you considered that a) i don't care and b) it's named that solely so i can make sex jokes about it
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🏳️‍🌈 gay4stickball follow
is he, ya know *mimes jerking off* an ncaa exy player
#i don't believe that straight exy players exist
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🙈 ittybittyminny follow
Andrew Minyard!!!!!!! 🥰🥰 short king!!!!🤏🤏😋😋 Awwwwwwww the scrunkly!!!!! 🤗🤗🤗 My boinky boy!!!!!🥺🥺 Crinkly doo,,,,shronkle scrimblo......🥺🥺🥺 rb if you'd scrunkle!!!!!!! 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺
📖 sapphic-exy follow
he literally killed someone
🙈 ittybittyminny follow
And? God forbid women do anything
#also no proof he did that #yeah there's proof his twin bro killed someone but that's not the same bc theyre different people #almost killing someone doesnt count
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🐦‍⬛ edgarallenexy
got told i'm problematic for liking the ravens? THAT'S LITERALLY MY SCHOOL OH MY GOD
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🌸 softexy
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Kevin Day - A Study
#kevin day #psu foxes #palmetto foxes #exy #web weave #poetry #psu foxes #palmetto #edgar allen
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A FRESH START [drabble]
[a/n: I was a useless little writer today, but at last minute I remembered that since it was Mother's Day little Grogu might wanna celebrate with his Ma. Also, sorry for no tags. Tumblr was a bitch about it. I might actually have to cut the taglist in half but I'll let y'all know before I do if that happens.]
Din Djarin x Female!Reader
Warnings: none, just pure fluffy fluff
Word Count: 655
Summary: Happy Ma Day!
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No significant spot in the 'AFS' timeline, just random fluff.
#??: HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY, LOVE MA
.
After bringing Grogu home from school, he dragged his book bag to his and his father’s room with a little pep in his step and you watched him go with a small chuckle. You turned your attention to straightening the kitchen while also cutting up some fruit for Grogu’s after school snack. Right before you could call out for him, you watched him bounce into the room and onto the counter. In his hands was a folded piece of paper.
“What do you got there, baby?” You questioned.
“Ma.” Grogu beamed and held the paper out to you. “Ma!”
You took the paper from him and realized it was a handmade card. On the front written in Grogu’s familiar, messy scrawl were the words, ‘Happy Mother’s Day’ above a big, red heart that was drawn on the front with paint. Your eyes widened in surprise and opened the card to see a picture Grogu had drawn of you and him. In the drawing, the two of you were hugging.
“Love Ma.” Grogu hummed and pointed to the card. You knew the holiday was coming up and that the school would be doing something, but you hadn’t given it a second thought. 
“Oh, baby.” You set the card down and pulled Grogu into a tight hug. He nuzzled his head into your neck. “I love you too, baby.”
When you finally separated, Grogu snatched the bowl of fruit you made him before bouncing away. Meanwhile, you couldn’t stop staring at the adorable card as tears pricked at your eyes and your lips curled into the stupidest, silliest grin.
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Din was able to make his way home early and looked forward to being able to spend a little extra time with his family. He breezed into the house⏤ through the foyer and into the kitchen. His mouth opened to call out for you or Grogu, but the sound of your soft cries made his heart stop. 
“Ner kar’ta??” Din gasped. You were leaning on the kitchen counter with your hands pressed to your cheeks, eyes rimmed red. He bolted to the other side of the room to pull you into his arms. His first few panicked words slipped out in Mando’a before he swapped to Basic, “What happened? Are you alright?”
“Grogu⏤”
Din stiffened, “Grogu? Is he⏤”
“He’s fine.” You sniffled and shook your head. Din watched as your lips curled up into a smile as a shuddering laugh left your lips. “Look. He made me this card.” You motioned down to the counter where a piece of paper sat. Din read the front before flipping it open to examine the insides. The drawing made him chuckle under his breath. “It’s for mother’s day. Grogu made me a mother’s day card.”
Din’s chuckle turned into a relieved, shaky laugh, “Oh, ner kar’ta. You scared the hell out of me.”
“I’m sorry.” You shook your head and fanned your face with your hands as if you were trying to bite back even more tears. Maker, you were adorable. He lifted a hand to cup the side of your face. You sniffled again. “I know I’m being stupid and overly emotional about this⏤”
Din shook his head. “Don’t apologize.” He leaned forward to tap his forehead against yours. “I’m not as surprised as you seem to be by this gift though.” Din rubbed your back. “How about I make dinner for us tonight? You sit back and relax, Ma.”
You nodded and picked up the card with a teary laugh. “I’m gonna hang this in my room so I can look at it every single day forever.” You motioned toward the hall. “I’m also gonna go find your son so I can smother him in kisses.”
Din could hear Grogu’s babbling mingle with your voice as you found him in the hall. He leaned against the counter and quietly corrected your words to himself. “Our son, ner kar’ta.”
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mando'a translation
ner kar'ta: my heart
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king--of--ducks · 3 months
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I am Lucifer Morningstar, King of Hell, sin of Pride!
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🍎I am Lucifer Morningstar, but you can call me Luci’ or even Apple Daddy if you wish~🍎
🍎I have a daughter named Charlotte, but everyone calls her Charlie. And if anyone hurts her, well, I’ll fucking wipe them out. This is my game, I’m the ref!🍎
🍎Charlie has informed me that I, apparently, have fans on the internet? And I figured if there are people who love me out there, might as well talk to them! Take that depression!🍎
🍎No spamming walls of text/emojis in my ask!🍎
OOC:I have no association with Vivziepop or her characters, this is just an obsessed fan being bored and goofing off. Things will most likely be out of character at times, I’m just kinda having fun with this.
I also decided to edit my pinned post to add this bit. This blog has been covering sensitive topics lately such as sh, ed, sui, and more. If you are not comfortable with this, I try to tag the posts to the best of my feeble minded capabilities, but that is content you can find here, so be warned.
I have a Discord server
Oh wow, it’s lore!
The Morning(star)
The Scars of an Angel
A Brush with Death
The Blue-Gem series
The Blue-Gem series(2)
The Blue-Gem series(3)
The Blue-Gem series(4)
The Blue-Gem series(5)
Mod—
@sockmanduckman
Circle of role players—
Same mod—
@moxxies-wife—Blitzø’s employee #1
@mammon-money-maker—Nuisance
@wally-wackfords-wacky-blog—Blitzø’s old chum
@ace-loves-josh
Family—
@charlie-morningstar666–My beautiful little girl!
@the-moth-ex-angel—Soon to be daughter in law!
@alyxdefoisnthere—Bad sleep schedule daughter.
@damian-morningstar—Son
@headlessdeaddancer—My (step-)son!
@mcalastor—fiancé Freaky ass bitch.
@god-the-lord—My father has Tumblr?!?!
@bigdoginthesky—Another dad
@theholymessenger—Gabriel
@theholyhealer—Raphael
@michael-the-morningstar—Michael
@heavenly--knight—Another Michael?!?!
@ask-the-archs—2 for 1
@featheryhoe—King of Lust
Other—
@blitztheoissilent—Blitzø (formerly @blitz-horsie-enthusiast and @blitz-the-o-is-silent)
@logical-imp—Blitzø’s employee #2
@ducky-loyal-servant-of-lucifer—Cure for depression
@xxsmilingdeerxx—Freak
@radio-demon-on-the-air—Freak *2
@fizzythefrog—Blitzø’s bestie
@blue-gem-overlord—Ripoff Lapis
@heavens-gatekeeper—Petah!!!!
@king-mammon—Another Mammon
@sad-bird-stolas—My bestie
@the-original-dickmaster—My best friend
@the-exterminator—Adam’s petty ex
@lute-head-exterminator—Adam’s petty ex*2
@bad-boy-lover—Niffty
@nifftyhasaknife—Niffty*2
@penguinmaster9999—T and pals
@deadbeatbartender—Husker
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You know, I can't ever get over the scene where V and Urizen merge. And it's not what you're thinking. It's not cause I was shell-shocked by it (I had it spoiled before playing tee-hee). It's not cause V and Urizen are (basically) never gonna show up again- IT'S BECAUSE VERGIL LOOKS LIKE A FUCKING NURSING HOME PATIENT THAT IS SUFFERING MEMORY LOSS.
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THIS IS THE FACE OF A MAN WHO IS CONFUSED AND UNSURE OF WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON. Vergil was out here thinking he was gonna die but fate said, for the 8000nth time, "Fuck you bitch; live goddamnit~✨!"
Tell me I'm not the only one who just dies laughing every time I see this.
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"What- Where am I? Huh, our house looks a lot different than I remember... Why do I remember being dressed like an emo stripper- what is happening---- Oh hey, Dante and *probably* Dante's son." (100% believe that Vergil thought Nero was Dante's)
MASTER LIST FOR TUMBLR
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scoonsalicious · 8 days
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Unwanted: Chapter 29, Unarmed, Redux - Pt. 3
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Avenger!Fem!Reader
Summary: When your FWB relationship with your best friend Bucky Barnes turns into something more, you couldn’t be happier. That is, however, until a new Avenger sets her sights on your super soldier and he inadvertently breaks your heart. You take on a mission you might not be prepared for to put some distance between the two of you and open yourself up to past traumas. Too bad the only one who can help you heal is the one person you can no longer trust.
Warnings: (For this part only; see Story Masterlist for general Warnings) Language, manipulation, one last super soldier betrayal.
Word Count: 1.3k
Previously On...: You and Bucky finally have the long-awaited talk.
A/N: Ew, Steve.
NOTE! The tag list is a fickle bitch, so I'm not really going to be dealing with it anymore. If you want to be notified when new story parts drop, please follow @scoonsaliciousupdates
Banner By: The absolutely amazing @mrsbuckybarnes1917!
Thank you to all those who have been reading; if you like what you've read, likes, comments, and reblogs give me life, and I truly appreciate them, and you!
Taglist: (Sadly, tag list is closed; Tumblr will not let me add anyone new. If you want to be notified when I update, please Follow me for Notifications!) @jmeelee @cazellen @mrsbuckybarnes1917 @blackhawkfanatic @buckybarnessimpp @hayjat @capswife @itsteambarnes @marygoddessofmischief @sebastians-love @learisa @lethallyprotected @rabbitrabbit12321 @buckybarnesandmarvel @fanfictiongirl77 @calwitch @fantasyfootballchampion @selella @jackiehollanderr @wintercrows @sashaisready @missvelvetsstuff @angelbabyyy99 @keylimebeag @maybefoxysouls @vicmc624 @j23r23 @wintercrows @crist1216 @cjand10 @pattiemac1@les-sel @dottirose @winterslove1917 @harperkenobi @ivet4 @casey1-2007 @mrsevans90 @steeph-aniie @bean-bean2000 @beanbagbitch @peachiestevie @wintrsoldrluvr @shadowzena43
Tumblr will not let me directly tag the following: @marcswife21 @erelierraceala @jupiter-107 @doublejeon @hiqhkey @unaxv @brookeleclerc
There was a gentle knock on the hospital room door, and Steve stuck his head in. “Hey,” he said softly. “Tony said you were awake. Is it okay if I come in?”
You shared a quick glance at Bucky, who shrugged. “Sure,” you said.
Steve shuffled into the room and stood awkwardly at the end of your bed. “I’m so glad to see you awake, Pocket. You really had us scared there for a minute.” Steve was using his official Captain voice, which immediately put you on edge. Why?
“Why are you acting weird, Stevie?” Bucky asked, and you were glad he also seemed to sense it.
Steve coughed into his fist. “I was, uh, actually hoping I could speak to Pocket alone for a minute, Buck.”
Bucky looked at you, then made a move to get off the hospital bed, but you held your hand out, stopping him. “No, Buck– stay; we’re not done.” You turned back to Steve. “I’m sorry, Steve, but I’m not ready for him to go just yet.”
“Oh, okay… well, I can come back later…” he began, but his manner was so bizarre, he now had you on your guard.
“I’m sure whatever it is you have to say to me, you can say in front of your best friend, Steve,” you said carefully, taking Bucky’s hand again. 
Steve closed his eyes and sighed heavily. “I suppose you’re right, Pocket,” he said after a moment, “considering this concerns him, too.” You and Bucky exchanged a glance, both curious and a little wary of what the captain might have to say.
Steve gripped the bottom railing of your bed, as if relying on it for support. “I owe you both a sincere apology,” he said eventually. “You have to know, it was never my intention for things to go as far as they did; I never meant for you to get hurt, Pocket. You have to believe me.”
You were stunned into silence, not knowing what exactly Steve was referring to, and not sure you wanted to.
Bucky’s eyes widened in realization and he sat up straighter. “You son of a bitch,” he said, catching on to something you obviously hadn’t grasped yet. His entire body tensed up, and he spoke in a tone you’d never heard him use with Steve before– low, and angry. Furious. “I can’t believe you would fucking do that to us. To me. After everything.”
Steve looked down, refusing to meet Bucky’s eye, and you saw his cheeks redden with embarrassment. And shame.
“Uh, maybe it’s the after effects of the anesthesia, or the extensive blood loss, or all the recent head trauma, but, uh, I am not following,” you said, looking between both men. Bucky was staring daggers at Steve now. “What am I missing? What are you apologizing for, Steve?”
Bucky’s jaw was hard, and you could practically feel him grinding his teeth next to you. “You wanna tell her, Rogers, or should I?”
Steve swallowed, then eventually looked back up at you. “I was the one who approved Jade for the Russia mission. I… I made sure that she didn’t get on the Quinjet until it was too late for Bucky to get her off, so that he’d have to take her along.”
“What?!” you practically shouted. “Steve, why would you do that? You saw what happened to Rhodey because of her! Why would you put Bucky in danger like that?!”
“The same reason he put her in the room next door to me, doll,” Bucky said. “And the same reason he insisted I’d be the one to train her, even though I begged him to do it when she started becoming a problem.”
You frowned, not sure what to make of what Bucky was saying. Surely Steve wouldn’t… he couldn’t…
“I didn’t make you do anything, Bucky,” Steve said softly. “I just… manufactured some circumstances. You made your own choices.”
Things were slowly clicking into place for you. “Hold up,” you interjected. “Steve, are you saying you deliberately put Jade in Bucky’s path?” You looked at him, waiting for a response, but his silence and avoidance of your eyes was answer enough. “Why would you do that, Steve?” you asked, suspecting you already knew, yet not wanting to believe.
“When Bucky and I were younger,” Steve began, continuing to avoid your gaze, “back in the ‘30s and ‘40s, Bucky never stayed with one girl for very long. Didn’t want to settle down, commit himself.” Steve sighed and you felt Bucky tense up beside you. “He never meant to break anyone’s heart, but it still happened, all the same. When the two of you got together, I knew it was only going to be a matter of time… before he got… bored, and moved on.”
“Now listen here, you fucking punk,” Bucky began, moving to stand. You put a hand on his thigh, urging him to stay seated.
“Let him talk, Buck,” you said calmly, much more calmly than you actually felt. “I want to hear what he has to say.”
The look Bucky gave you was pained, as though he was terrified you were buying into Steve’s excuses. Steve seemed to think so, as well, because he continued, seemingly emboldened: “I couldn’t stand the thought of you being hurt like that,” he went on. “I thought it would be better, for the both of you, if you realized it sooner, rather than later, when you’d both gotten in too deep, that it just wasn’t meant to work out between you.”
You gaped at him, speechless, while Bucky clenched and unclenched his fists beside you. “When you got shot, Pocket, when I saw how Bucky reacted to the idea of losing you, I… I realized his feelings for you were the real thing, that I never should have meddled. Not only did I help set you up for needless heartbreak, but I put you in danger. And I’m sorry.”
“You’re full of shit,” Bucky said, standing up now. He walked over to Steve, poking him in the chest.  “You can pretend you were doing it out of the goodness of your heart all you want, but I know better. I know you. What was your endgame, huh? Swoop in and play the white knight? Be a shoulder for Pocket to cry on until she was vulnerable enough to give into you?”
Steve swallowed thickly, and you could hear the unspoken answer in it. Yes.
“I never meant for you to get hurt,” Steve said, looking to you with pleading eyes. “You have to believe me.”
“You have no idea what you’ve done!” Bucky shouted at Steve. “What you cost her, us!” He shoved Steve backward with both hands, and Steve took it. “She almost died– twice! She got shot, she lost our baby, all because of shit you helped put in motion! I don’t know how I can ever forgive you, man!”
“You’re not innocent in this, Bucky–” Steve began, and then realization overcame him. “Wait– what do you mean, ‘lost your baby?’” He looked to you. “Pocket, you were pregnant? Bucky was the father?”
This was too much. “Get out, Steve,” you said quietly, with no emotion in your voice.
“Pocket, I–” Steve tried, but you interrupted him. “I said ‘get out,’” you reiterated. “You may be my captain, but you and I? We can’t ever be friends again. Not after something like this.”
Steve looked distraught. “But you can forgive him?” he asked, jerking a thumb toward Bucky. “He fucked her, and you’re gonna let that slide?” 
“Language, Steve,” you said mechanically, almost as if automated. “And whether or not I forgive Bucky is none of your business. All you need to concern yourself with is that I don’t forgive you. Now, please; get out. I can’t stand to look at you.”
“Pocket, please–” Steve tried one last time, but Bucky started backing him up toward the door.
“She said ‘out,’ Rogers.” Bucky said, holding the door open. “And if you don’t want me wiping the floor with your ass, I suggest you do as she asks.”
With a final, forlorn look in your direction, Steve Rogers turned and exited the hospital room.
<- Previous Part / Next Part ->
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laconicenigma · 2 months
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⁂ Bubba Sawyer x Male Reader
Hello!! ⍢ I’m new to Tumblr so I hope this is a sufficient first post… I love Leatherface!!
❀ ; Male reader, FtM, AMAB friendly! (He/Him) Reader is implied to be taller, possibly buffer/broader as well. He leans more towards traditionally masculine. He’s a smooth talker with a bit of Southern charm to fit the setting a little.
❀ ; Bubba Sawyer AMAB (She/He/They) Bubba may be bit out of character, I added in some of my own personal headcanons and such! A mix of their paranoid personality in the 1st movie as well as their affectionate side shown in the 2nd. Hope you like! ◡̈
⁂ Headcanons
It doesn’t take that much to swoon Bubba.
She succumbs so easily to a bit of flirting, as we can see from the 2nd movie. A bit of sweet talk with a sprinkle of pet names and suddenly she’s a big, squealing mess.
The whole Sawyer family is wildly eccentric, so you don’t have too much to worry about in regards to their acceptance. Sure, you’d most likely be a popular joke in the household but it’s nothing worse than what they give each other. Given the time of the film, the most you’d have to worry about would be the public’s opinion about you and your dangerous lover; but let’s just assume that they don’t get the chance to know about y’all.
On a similar note, your sex and gender don’t matter to Bubba all that much. He clearly has unique ways of expressing himself, and he knows it (because of all the teasing his brothers do). He wouldn’t find his feelings for a man to be weird or anything of the sort; though he’d still probably be surprised at the fact. Don’t worry your pretty little head though, Bubba is the furthest thing from judgmental.
The surprise would just be because they’ve always been more into femininity. Both in the way the dress themselves, to the people they’re attracted to— Bubba’s just always loved to indulge in more womanly things. But that doesn’t eliminate you from having a chance, not at all!
The second you sweet talk him with your smooth voice, he’s on the damn floor.
Bubba didn’t have to fortune of receiving affection while she grew up. She’s most likely been isolated from regular society her whole life, and we know damn well the Sawyer’s aren’t known for their loving nature. Take your hands and just gently graze her face a little, or tell her how sweet she is and how much you love her, she’s all yours.
Even just some basic manners will get you a long way with Bubba. They yearn for some sort of human interaction that isn’t clouded with blood and the hum of a chainsaw, don’t blame them! A ‘Thank you’ will keep them giddy for weeks on end.
Trying to shift to a more realistic perspective, though, you’d have to be one sweet son of a bitch to get the Sawyer’s to spare you.
We saw how Bubba eventually folded under the pressures of his families demands when it came to Stretch, even though he liked her quite a bit. If you even want to get close to the point of Bubba stepping in to protect you, you are gonna have to be the smoothest and most charming man he’s ever met (which isn’t very hard, but still). No trying to fight or escape like Stretch, though you’d probably meet Bubba on different circumstances anyways.
⁂ Scenario
‘Oh, god damn!’ Was the only thought that seemed to run through your head at the moment. Wrist pressed against your forehead and sweat dripping down your lips, an exasperated sigh fell from your dry mouth. It was moments like these that made you regret fixin’ up such an old girl to be your car; she could be a bit unreliable.
It’s not like it was the car’s fault, no, you should’ve known you were runnin’ out of fuel just from how long you’d been driving. But, damn, you really needed to fix up that faulty fuel gauge. Always having to be on edge when you traveled, since you didn’t know when your gas was going to run out. Shit, what was even wrong with it?
The sun was burning your skin, and you needed some sort of help. It was only you out here.
After wandering around the unfamiliar area for a long few minutes, a sense of relief completely washed over you when a large farmhouse came into view. The estate was beautiful, and you could only hope somebody in it would be willing to help you out. After walking through the long dirt driveway, you gently stepped onto the porch of the home. The old floorboards creaked under your weight, the peeling paint bringing a slight surprise to your face. The home sure looked occupied, though not very taken care of. You gently knocked against the white frame of the screen door.
“Hello? ‘S anyone home?” You tried to call through. If you looked closely enough, you could see into the interior of the home. For some odd reason, these people didn’t close their front door. That either meant that they were home, or they were just plain careless.
You called out once more, speaking to the walls of the home in hopes you’d elicit a response. “Hey, partner, I’m in a real bad place right now. I-If I could just get some help here, it would be much appreciated,” a chuckle carried through your speech, though you were only met with radio silence from the home. “My car’s broke down and, by god, it’s hot as hell today. If I could just get a glass of water, I’ll be in your debts forever,” you held your tongue after you spoke, desperate for any sign of life within the home. You were practically dyin’ out here!
You were about to make your ways away from the property when you heard some booming thuds from within the building. You leaned into the screen door, squinting as you tried to decipher the darkness of the place. You couldn’t make out much, though you were almost certain you could see a figure cautiously trying to make it down the stairs— almost like they didn’t want you to see them. The person looked— and sounded— huge, though. With the amount of area they were taking in the staircase, alongside their heavy and creaking steps— this person had to be big. Without a doubt. Even if you could only make out a silhouette.
Upon noticing the mystery person, a smile stretched across your handsome features and you began to wave at them through the screen. “Hey, partner! Am I glad to see you!” You exclaimed to them, though the figure stayed unmoving. You realized that you probably came off a little strong, so you attempted to backtrack in the case that they had just noticed you. You spoke again, this time much softer and sweeter, “My car broke down not to far from here. Real sorry about showin’ up on your property like this but I could really use some help. Anythin’ would be much appreciated,” You managed to coo through the screen, an inviting smile on your lips.
The figure seemed to be trying to process the situation, not moving towards or away from you, though you could see their head dart around frantically. Not a good sign. You attempted to calm them from afar, they were your only hope at salvation at the moment. “Hey, hey, hey, now… Don’t worry, I ain’t here for trouble, darlin’. I promise,” as the words left your throat, so soothing and calm, the figure laid their gaze directly onto you. You could feel it. “You don’t have’ta help me, sweetheart. I can leave you be right now— but I ain’t a threat.” To speak to soft and so loving was something of second nature to you, but it was currently, unknowingly, saving your ass right now. “I’d just really appreciate a hand, if you’d be willing to give,” your desperation was painfully obvious. That seemed to be the breaking point for the person— in a good sense.
They slowly made their way down the stairs, the wood moaning under their weight as they stepped. Once they came closer, you were able to slowly make out their features. Their clothes looked dirty and old, though mostly concealed by a bright yellow apron— and they were fucking huge. Tall and big, extremely fucking huge. Though you two battled heights pretty evenly, you’d still have to say you were pleasantly surprised about their stature. You’d never really met someone who stood head to head with you like this. However, it took everything within yourself not to cringe at the mask they sported. It looked so— so grotesquely real. Like nothing you’d ever seen, not even at a Halloween store.
Even though it was grossly off-putting, you made the decision to not point it out. Didn’t want to scare off your only help at the moment. One of their large hands timidly laid against the frame of the screen door and pushed it open. They softly squealed in a pig-like manner.
Once the door pushed open, you got a good look at this person in all their glory. They looked just as grimy and dirty as they were when they were shielded by the screen, though now you could make out more finite details— like their crooked teeth and hairy arms. They refused to make eye contact, their body tense and frightened. They definitely raised a few red flags in your mind, and you couldn’t say they were truly all that attractive— but you still found them cute, for some odd reason. You smiled at their compliance, despite it all. “Hey, darlin’, thank you for openin’ up for me,” the words smoothly fell from your lips, causing their gaze to bore into you. They made some sort of mumbling sound, unintelligible to you. They seemed so utterly confused.
You gave them a signature smile, sensing their discomfort, and doing your best to alleviate it. You could tell at this point that they probably weren’t used to interacting with people, given the way they had been so reclusive. In attempts to get them to open up, you spoke softer, kinder, even more charming than usual. “There any way you can help me, partner?” You were burning at this point, skin glistening with sweat and your clothes glued to the moisture on your body. They seemed to try and subtly eye you, though they were extremely obvious— even moreso as they embarrassedly looked away from you. You chuckled.
They shifted on their feet, acting shy despite how intimidating they were as a person. After a moment of thought, they nodded a bit. When they looked at you again, you could make out a hint of a shy smile on their face. They stepped aside, willingly giving you a pathway into their mysterious home. You stared into their eyes, giving them a handsome, toothy, smile. “Thanks, darlin’,” You hummed to the large and timid person. They squealed a bit, joy taking over their face as you stepped foot into their odd home.
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konohokelly · 3 months
Text
LEECH - Sejanus Plinth (2/2)
Leeches are segmented parasitic or predatory worms that comprise the subclass Hirudinea.
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Summary: Hirudinea Snow is going to baby-trap Sejanus Plinth to get her hands on the Plinth fortune. Warnings: Sex, manipulation, sexual assault (baby-trapping), toxicity, OC is a bitch, Sejanus is too good for her, OC is a bad person through and through, OC is a Capitol supremacist, Coriolanus is a weirdo Dead Dove Do Not Eat. Minors DNI Slight Hilarius Heavensbee x MC MC is fem and named but her appearance is never explicitly described.
Borders by @saradika on tumblr
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"Don't worry about what I'm doing. Snow lands on top."
Coriolanus wondered what his cousin meant by that. He guessed at what petty schemes she could have been up to, but he didn’t expect it to lead him here:
Standing against the living room wall, fuming as Hirudinea presented the family with the gifts showered upon her by her official boyfriend of a month now, Sejanus Plinth.
"And this is for you, Grandma'am, isn't it stunning?" Hirudinea said as she wrapped the mink scarf around her grandmother's neck.
"Oh, my sweet girl, it's beautiful," Grandma'am beamed in front of the tall mirror. The air of pride she had been without for so long felt like it had returned.
"I just knew you would love it."
Grandma'am turned to Hirudinea, planting a kiss on her cheek.
"So thoughtful of you, my darling. You must thank the Heavensbees. Their son is such a good, generous boy."
Hirudinea hadn't told Grandma'am about the breakup or Sejanus yet. She knew the woman would be upset that her granddaughter wasn't with her own kind and she would force Hirudinea to cut off the Plinth heir before her goal was reached.
"I'll pass the message along..." she lied.
Tigris smiled at her grandmother's merriment.
She was glad Hirudinea had found a boy who was so taken with her, even though her sister couldn't tell Grandma'am who the boy really was.
Sejanus treated her sister well and made sure to be just as giving to the rest of the Snow family.
Tigris herself held a length of luxurious fabric on her lap, a gift from Sejanus.
Hirudinea was over the moon; she couldn't have picked a better mark.
Even without a baby, dating Sejanus came with perks. He was nothing if not giving, and my, how Hirudinea would take.
All she had to do was mention something she wanted in passing, and it didn't take long before it showed up to her apartment with love notes attached, singing her highest praise.
Of course, she hardly ever read them.
"You know you don't have to get me all this stuff; I'm not with you for your money," she would say to him, lying to his face.
"I know, but I want to do this for you. You're my girl, and I want to make sure you know how special you are to me. Besides, it's not like I use my allowance to do much anyways."
It sickened her that his allowance could afford such luxury while she had to scrounge together pennies for her life's savings.
Most of the gifts she received from him ended up pawned off to pay for upkeep and taxes.
Hirudinea had Sejanus completely whipped, and it was obvious. The curly-haired boy was never a big spender but would buy her the world if he could.
'Sejanus can't afford the world on his allowance yet, but maybe Strabo Plinth can; that's where my baby will come in handy.'
"Corio," Hirudinea called across the room from where she and Grandma'am inspected their new clothes, "A basket came with the rest of my things. Be a dear and check what's inside?"
He huffed but checked the basket anyways. It was full to the brim with homemade cookies.
"Baked goods from Mrs. Plinth," he informed gloomily.
Hirudinea turned from the mirror with a large fur coat adorning her shoulders and walked over.
The girl picked up one cookie, biting into it without a second thought.
"Blagh," she grimaced, spitting out the treat, "Raisins! Disgusting. Leave it to the Plinths to ruin a perfectly good cookie with nasty, cheap raisins."
She spoke as if her family could even afford that.
"It was a kind gesture, Dinea. I'm sure Mrs. Plinth meant no harm by it," Tigris reasoned.
"Whatever," Hirudinea scoffed, moving on to try on more clothes.
This was the Hirudinea that Coriolanus knew; condescending and cruel.
If Sejanus didn't see it, then he was either more stupid than Coriolanus thought or Hirudinea was more cunning than she had let on all these years.
Or maybe it was a mixture of both.
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Hilarius Heavensbee was understandably upset by the news of the latest relationship in the Academy. He had tried in vain to win Hirudinea back, but nothing worked.
Her friends had been in shock at the news too. After all, Hirudinea had always been just as unsettled by Sejanus' presence among them as Arachne and Livia had been.
The two, along with Hilarius, assumed the couple wouldn't last long, and eventually, Hirudinea would remember where she belongs.
But by the third month of their apparent relationship, Hirudinea and Sejanus were still a constant fixture at each other's sides.
He followed her around like a lost puppy, and she happily fell into his open arms.
School was usually Coriolanus's safe haven from his cousin, but being Sejanus's only friend, he was forced to be around her much more than he liked. He had to watch them kiss and hold hands throughout the day.
Watching Hirudinea act like a changed woman in front of Sejanus made Coriolanus's head hurt.
He even began to fondly recall the days she had been with Hilarius, when the pair would argue incessantly about anything and everything.
At least then, she allowed her venom to flow freely.
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Hirudinea pushed Sejanus against the wall of the janitors closet. They were in his father's office building and things were heating up.
It was the weekend, and he was supposed to be observing how his father runs the business, but when his beautiful girlfriend had showed up and whispered dirty things in his ear, he couldn't help but wander away after her.
He ended up moving from the wall to a nearby chair, trousers and boxers around his ankles as she knelt before him.
"Fuck" he cursed under his breath when she wrapped her fingers around his base of his veiny cock.
Hirudinea flattened her tongue against his tip, massaging his slit as he let out a soft grunt.
She raised her head, gathering saliva in her mouth, before leaning over him and letting it all fall onto his member.
With the hand on his base, she stroked his slowly but firmly, coating his entire cock with the liquid. Eventually adding another hand.
She twisted her wrists, wringing his cock hard.
Occasionally, she would wrap her lips around the tip and suck.
He bit into his hand in an attempt to muffle his sounds, but it didn't do much to conceal the throaty groans escaping him.
"Please, baby" he whimpered pathetically.
She chuckled darkly.
With her lips around him, she sank down, opening her throat to take him as deep as possible, making sure he hit the back of her throat.
Sejanus moaned deeply. His hips thrusting up against his will due to the sensations of her fingers and mouth.
He clenched his fists to prevent them from coming to the back of her head and keeping her there.
He was losing it, and it was making her wetness grow.
"So good, baby" he moaned with half lidded eyes.
He was close and she could tell.
But she didn't want his spend in her mouth. She needed it inside her.
Hirudinea let him go, making him whine at the loss of stimulation.
She sat on his lap, grinding her cunt against his manhood.
"I wish I could feel you without anything between us" she whispered.
It would be good for her pregnancy timeline to fuck him raw a few times, but she would be okay with it if he still wanted to use a condom.
She'd prepared so many and still had three left.
Glancing at the front pocket of her bag, she could see one, two, thre-
Wait, there were only two, that couldn't be right.
"I want to feel you too, baby. Can I? I'll pull out, I swear. I just need you so bad" he promised, holding her face in his hands.
She could work with this.
"Do you care about me?" She asked with intensity behind her voice
"Of course, Dinea. I lo-I care about you so much"
"Then don't pull out"
His eyes glistened. It felt like he was dreaming.
All he'd wanted to do since she gave him permission to touch her was cum deep inside her.
Arms wrapped around his neck, she raised her hips and to circle her entrance with his tip before slipping onto his cock.
She struggled a little, but her spit and wetness provided extra lubrication. Although they had slept together many times, she still wasn't fully used to taking his large cock.
She sank all the way down, pressing her ass against his heavy balls.
The groan that erupted from Sejanus's throat was so deep it became a growl.
Finally losing all semblance of control, he gripped her hips and began bouncing her on his cock, thrusting his hips upwards to meet hers.
The friction from his hair and happy trail against her clit was incredible. She threw her head back and moaned.
Sejanus drew her head forward and kissed her deeply. Grunting and groaning against her mouth and swallowing her moans.
He reached a hand down, swiping at her clit and forcing her towards an orgasm.
He was already close before, so when she felt his cock twitch, she knew to push him over the edge.
"You wanna cum in me, baby -oh!" she jumped when he gave her a particularly harsh thrust.
"Ugh, fuck yes, sweetheart. I want to fill your pussy up with my cum" his voice slurred, he was drunk on the feeling of her pussy squeezing him hard.
"Gonna put my fucking load in this tight, wet pussy"
His fingers moved faster against her pleasure button.
"I need your cum, Sej" There was an ominous reality to her words he didn't realize, "Are you going to give it to me?"
"I'm going to give it to you, baby. You take my cock so well, makes me want to fill you up so bad - oh shit-"
Fuck, he was coming.
His pace became erratic, and he chanted her name over and over.
His fingers swiped at her clit one last time, and she clenched hard as she came, head thrown back in ecstasy.
He held her tight as he pumped his cum into her for the first time. Cock pulsing as he released everything he had into her womb.
They sat there for a few minutes, breathing heavily as they regained their bearings.
Once they caught their breaths, he gently raised her off his softening cock, holding her firmly as he stood and giving her a passionate kiss.
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They quietly got dressed.
A calm had settled in the air, and he enjoyed the time they had until they had to leave the sanctuary of the closet.
Unfortunately, it didn't last as long as he wanted.
An Avox walked into the janitors closet, clearly searching for something.
The mute man stared with wide eyes at the scene before him.
Sejanus felt like he had been caught doing something wrong.
Hirudinea scoffed at the intruder,
"And what are you looking at? Huh? It's not like you're going to tell someone. Leave! Before I decide to have you punished."
The Avox rushed out, bowing in apology.
Sejanus held her elbow gently, guiding her to look at him. "Sweetheart, there was no need for that."
'Shit.'
After playing the repentant bully for so long, her mask had slipped.
"I'm sorry. You know how I get sometimes," she looked down in mock shame.
"I'm trying to be better, but it's hard to unlearn the things that have been drilled into me for so long. This isn't who I am. Please don't be upset, Sej," Hirudinea began to cry.
It was her usual "get out of revealing your true self" card with him.
Sejanus' eyes softened; he couldn't stand to see his girlfriend cry, and he hated the fact that she thought he was angry with her.
"It's okay; you're trying to be better, that's more than most people ever do. I know that's not you anymore, Dinea."
She quickly kissed him, feeling any leftover worry melt away from him.
In reality, Hirudinea didn't care about some tongueless traitor to Panem, and it disgusted her that he did. Even now, with a purebred Capitol girlfriend, he still found camaraderie with rebels.
'You can take the boy out of the Districts, but you really can't take the Districts out of the boy.'
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'It's not a big deal,' she told herself later that day after failing to find the missing condom anywhere.
But it was a big deal; it could mean a huge wrench had been thrown in her plans.
Hirudinea had allowed herself to be weak a few months ago,
The day after sleeping with Sejanus for the first time, the heaviness of what she had just initiated fully hit her.
In need of familiarity, she had found herself bent over a desk in an empty classroom while Hilarius thrust into her from behind.
But had he used one of her sabotaged condoms? He knew the front pocket of her bag was where she kept the contraceptives; she had done it when they were dating, and they would have been easy for him to reach.
How did she get herself into this mess?
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The sun rose over the Plinth house as Sejanus was awoken from his slumber by his alarm clock.
He stretched an arm over Hirudinea's sleeping form to turn off the device.
She hadn’t heard it.
She was a deep sleeper and with the combination of Sejanus's plush mattress with 1000 thread count sheets and the rigorous 'physical activity' they were up to the night before, she was absolutely knocked out.
Sejanus leaned over Hirudinea, pressing a kiss to her forehead before gently shaking her awake.
"Time to get up, sweetheart" he whispered.
He was reluctant to leave the little domestic sphere they had created in his bedroom, but he knew they needed to prepare for school.
She sluggishly rose, standing and stretching her arms over her head.
"I'll start the shower" she told him "Before you join me, darling, could you please make sure the servants prepare my breakfast exactly the way I like it? Yesterday's service was absolutely sub-par"
"I-" Sejanus didn’t even finish his sentence before Hirudinea shut the bathroom door behind her.
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Her morning showers at the Plinth house were usually her was bliss.
Hirudinea had made a habit of staying the night with Sejanus. She adored getting to wake up on a luxurious bed, bathe with high-end products and sit down to an elegant breakfast.
It as a preview of what was to come, the life she would soon be living.
But this morning, she found herself under the steam of hot water, pre-occupied by thoughts of impending doom.
Her doctor’s appointment was scheduled for the evening.
Today was the day she would find out if she was pregnant and if she was, she had no idea who the father could be.
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Mrs Plinth smiled lightly as she watched her son walk hand-in-hand with his girlfriend to the car.
The two weren’t aware she knew the girl had been spending the night, but it brought the woman much delight to stand by her window, overlooking the front yard, and know in her heart she raised a good and sweet boy as she saw Sejanus open the door for Hirudinea and guide her inside.
Sejanus had never been so happy for so long since they came to the Capitol, and it was all due to the Snow girl that stole his heart.
When Hirudinea was at their house, she didn’t do much (or any) kitchen work with her boyfriends mother, like a district girl would.
She would stand uncomfortably in a corner of the kitchen, occasionally commenting on the progress being made with the baking until Sejanus would come in and drag Hirudinea away, informing his mother that Hirudinea isn’t used to doing housework.
Mrs Plinth liked the girl regardless, after all, she filled Sejanus with such joy that the boy would constantly gush to his mother about love and soul mates and weddings.
Hirudinea was good for her son.
"What is it?" Strabo asked behind her, getting ready to leave for the office.
"Nothing" Mrs Plinth said softly, closing the curtain as the car pulled away.
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It was official.
Hirudinea Snow was pregnant at eighteen.
She paid for the test with one of the watches Sejanus bought her.
When she thought of this moment months ago, she imagined there would be a feeling of fear at the knowledge that she was with child.
But no, all her dread came from the fact that she couldn't be sure who the father of her baby was.
She was supposed to have Sejanus Plinth's baby— the child that would be her family's ticket to a better life.
But if it was Hilarius's baby, then had she ruined her reputation for nothing? Had she just created another mouth for the Snows to feed?
No.
She decided it didn't matter.
Regardless of who the father of this child was, she would claim it was Sejanus.
Sejanus Plinth would be saddled with the responsibility, and his family would be her cash cows.
His name would be on the birth certificate.
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Sejanus had been confused when his girlfriend cancelled their date only to tell him to meet her at a park near the Corso.
He knew enough that when a girl says she needs to talk, it's not a good sign.
"Hi," he said softly as he approached, a nervous smile on his face.
He took a seat right next to her on the bench, handing her the flowers he had gotten—red roses, her favorites.
"Hi," she replied, barely looking at him.
"What's wrong, Dinea?" He was too anxious to beat around the bush.
"Nothing, it's just..." she paused, letting a single tear fall. She had practiced that trick all night. "...It's just that if I tell you this...you may not want to be with me anymore."
This filled him with sadness. How could she think there was anything that would make him leave her?
Was she sick? Was she in trouble? Had she taken a liking to someone else? He would work through anything to be with her.
"Whatever it is, we can get through it."
"Do you promise, Sej?"
"I promise," he took her hands in his own, a comforting gesture.
She took a deep breath for believability, giving it a beat of silence before spilling,
"I'm pregnant."
Sejanus blanched.
He didn't say anything; he didn't know what to say.
He was going to be a dad. HE WAS GOING TO BE A DAD.
He didn't feel ready; he hadn't done anything to make his kid proud yet. He hadn't helped to make the world a better place.
But then he thought of the fact that she was going to make him a dad, and suddenly everything was alright.
Hirudinea was the light of his life, the reason he felt anything was possible.
He had every intention to marry and have children with her one day. So what if the order of things got mixed up?
"I-I'm going to be a dad," he thought out loud, a smile cracking onto his face. "We're having a kid."
"You're happy?"
She expected him to take responsibility and be naively glad, but she didn't expect him to be over the moon about it.
"Of course I am," he holds her face in both hands. "There's nobody I would rather be doing this with than you."
He looked to her for permission before pressing his hand to her stomach.
"I love you, Dinea," he admitted.
She definitely wasn't expecting that.
Hirudinea kissed him hard, hoping it would suffice as a reply.
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When Hirudinea told her family they were invited to dinner at the Plinth residence, none of them knew what to think.
Coriolanus and Tigris weren't anticipating 'dinner at the in-laws house' so soon, and Grandma'am couldn't imagine for the life of her what business Hirudinea had with the Plinths.
As far as Grandma'am knew, the girl had always been smart enough to keep her distance from them and their unruly son.
The meal went smoothly, and the conversation was agreeable.
It was obvious to everyone that Hirudinea and Sejanus were excited about something. The pair giggled like children every time one looked at the other.
The whole table was curious.
It wasn't until the end of the meal, when the dishes had been cleared, that, holding hands, the couple stood to make an announcement.
Grandma'am gasped at the display.
Hirudinea began, "I'm sure you're all wondering the reason we called you here tonight, and it's because we have some very important news."
Sejanus gave her hand a gentle squeeze and continued, "We wanted our families to be the first to know that... we're having a baby."
Sejanus and Hirudinea waited eagerly for a reaction, but the silence at the table was palpable.
Scandalized, Grandma'am's hand rested on her chest.
It was Strabo who broke the silence first when he pushed his chair back loudly and walked out of the room.
Sejanus sent his girlfriend a look of apology, guiding her to sit down before following his father out.
Mrs. Plinth stood next, apologizing profusely before leaving.
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"Of all the irresponsible things you have done!" Strabo shouted at a rattling volume.
He was standing behind the desk in his study, glaring daggers at his son on the other side of the room.
"What's irresponsible about having a baby with the girl I love?! But you, how could you just leave like that when she's so vulnerable. Go out there and apologize now!" Sejanus wasn't having any of it.
He wouldn’t allow his father make Hirudinea feel small.
"Apologize? You just barely turned 18, Sejanus. You haven't even graduated yet. What do you two know about anything? About raising a child? About being a father?"
Sejanus took a step towards his father. "Don't talk to me about raising a child! You know, there's more to being a father than throwing money around."
Mrs. Plinth gasped. "Sejanus!"
"No, Ma. Dinea and I are going to raise our baby a different way. If he doesn't want to be involved in the baby's life, he doesn't have to be. We'll go somewhere else."
Strabo scoffed. "And where is that?"
"Back to 2. I'll work as a medic in the quarries. We'll have each other, and that's the only thing that matters. We'll go somewhere we can be together like a family." Sejanus said naively but with the best of intentions.
If Hirudinea was in the room, she would have wrung Sejanus's neck out by now.
Mrs. Plinth grabbed onto her son's shoulders. "Sejanus please, don't say that. You have school and-"
"None of it matters if we're not in a home where Dinea and the baby are loved."
"But you’re loved here"
"Not by him!"
Sejanus smiled softly. "It's okay, Ma, I love her and she loves me. It's all we need. We'll be fine."
Mrs. Plinth turned to her husband. "Strabo, I'm begging you. It doesn't have to be like this."
Though he tried to look tough, Strabo didn't want his son to leave. He loved Sejanus, even if he didn't always show it the right way.
He realized reluctantly that he would have to find a way to deal with this.
It wasn't so bad after all; his grandchild was to be mothered by a Snow, one of the oldest, most respectable families in Panem.
It wasn't like Hirudinea was some random girl.
He thought long and hard and decided this wasn't bad at all.
It was amazing!
It was the start of a new era for the Plinth family, where they would receive more respect from the people of the Capitol.
This could work.
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Back in the dining room, the extremely muffled voices of father and son could be heard engaged in an intense argument. The only other sound in the room was Grandma'am's wails of despair. Tigris held the old woman, who dramatically sought to sink to the floor.
Hirudinea rolled her eyes at the display.
"How long have you known?!" Coriolanus asked; the anger was evident in his voice.
"A few days," Hirudinea shrugged.
She knew her family would make a big deal out of it.
"You've known for days, and you didn't tell anyone? You didn't tell me?" Tigris gasped sadly.
Tigris had been there for Hirudinea since she was a baby; she held her sister's hand when the younger girl took her first steps, taught her sister how to read, ushered her through the scare of her first period.
Hirudinea shrugged, swirling the drink in her glass with a bored expression, "We're telling you now."
Coriolanus rose and slammed his hands down on the table. He had been annoyed with Hirudinea before, and he had disliked her actions before, but he never thought he'd come to be disgusted by her.
"How dare you, Dinea! How could you do this with him?" Coriolanus whispered the last part through gritted teeth. Hirudinea Snow, the most arrogant and stuck-up bitch he knew, knocked up by a boy from District 2 and proud?
"Do you even know how this reflects on all of us, you stupid fucking slut?!" Coriolanus yelled.
Tigris, on the other hand, wasn't angry, just disappointed. Raising kids wasn't easy; she would know, she raised two. The disappointment only grew when she remembered—
"We're finished!" Grandma'am cried. "Oh, you've ruined us, Hirudinea."
"Grandma'am, please," Tigris tried to console her grandmother to no avail.
"We'll never be able to show our faces again. The whole Capitol will know that my Hirudinea spread her legs for some filthy District boy!"
Tigris tried to shush the old woman, not wanting to offend their hosts.
"How could you do this to poor Hilarius? After all he's done for us," Grandma'am wept.
Hirudinea laughed. "Hilarius? I might as well tell you now, Hilarius and I haven't been together for ages. I've been lying for months."
Grandma'am nearly keeled over at the news.
Hirudinea continued, "All those pretty gifts were courtesy of Sejanus Plinth and how much he loves fucking me—"
Grandma'am rose and pointed a harsh finger. "Bite your tongue, you dirty little whore."
Hirudinea shook her head in exasperation, "Oh, please," she brushed off the insult.
Coriolanus wished he had the presence of mind to be happy his cousin was finally being reprimanded by the matriarch, but he was just sooo mad.
What was Dinea thinking?
As much as he tried not to, he could imagine it, Hirudinea under Sejanus, begging for his cum.
He wanted to throw up.
"This is too far, even for you," he seethed "I always knew you were a cheap skank but if-"
The door opened, and the dining room fell back to silence as the Plinths returned.
The Snows composed themselves as to not show weakness in front of their lessers.
As everyone took their seats, Sejanus brought Hirudinea's hand to his lips and placed a reassuring kiss there.
"My apologies for the way I left the room," Strabo said. "My shock outweighed my judgment. I should have been more thoughtful at this trying time."
"It's quite alright, sir." Hirudinea said.
The rest of her family maintained tight faces, adding to the tense environment in the room.
It was obvious they were displeased with the situation they had found themselves.
"Have you two discussed things yet?" Mrs. Plinth asked trying to lighten the mood. "What doctor you'll be seeing? Your prenatal vitamins?"
Hirudinea gave an innocent smile. "Oh, I already take vitamins. Vitamin C in the morning and vitamin D at night."
All the adults and Coriolanus stared in disbelief.
This was not someone ready to have a baby.
Tigris buried her head in her hands and let out a quiet sob.
Hirudinea knew how stupid she sounded but needed to look incompetent for her plan to work.
Mrs. Plinth and Strabo shared a look.
He nodded to his wife before speaking, "We understand that pregnancy isn't easy and things don't get easier when the baby comes, so to alleviate the burden on your family, why don't you come live here with us, Hirudinea?" Strabo offered.
Sejanus smiled hopefully, "We'll take care of you, sweetheart. I'll be here the whole time, and we'll go to doctor's visits together and make the nursery." He was already dreaming of what came next.
Hirudinea knew she wouldn't be caught dead covered in paint, building a nursery. That's what Avoxes are for. But she kissed him softly, playing up the love-dumb-girl act for his family.
Mrs. Plinth clasped her hands at the loving display.
Hirudinea wouldn’t mind living with the Plinths, although they irritated her with their strange mannerisms, their home had become a welcome getaway from her problems.
And by now, the servants along with Mrs Plinth and Sejanus were used to serving her hand and foot.
It would also help with keeping her hidden away before she announced the pregnancy to her classmates. She didn’t doubt that when she stopped showing up to school, her next floor neighbour, Arachne, would be at the penthouse door searching for answers.
Hirudinea looked at her lap like she was thinking before releasing a sigh and responding, "Thank you for your offer, Mr. Plinth. I would love to stay with your family and be close to Sejanus, but there's so much I'm needed for at home. Business has been going well, but there are still so many expenses and taxes. We're keeping up, but we all need to pull our weight."
The other Snows exchanged looks. Business wasn't going well, in fact, there was no business at all, and they definitely weren't keeping up with expenses.
"We would be happy to provide a stipend to make this period easier on you," Strabo said. "And also to sincerely apologize to the Snow family for this entire situation"
He was ecstatic to get his moment to show the Snows that his family would be more than adequate in caring for Hirudinea's needs. And since she was a girl of such good breeding, he would go all out.
He pulled out a small notepad and began jotting down some numbers. When he finished, he slid the page across to the pregnant girl.
"Will this amount suffice for each month?" He asked.
She took it and positioned the paper between herself and Coriolanus. 
The blonde boy had to stop himself from choking when he saw the number of zeros on the page. Hirudinea was taken aback too; this was way more than she was expecting. Not only would they be able to pay off the penthouse in a couple of months, but they could also afford new furniture and still have enough to send Coriolanus to university.
Grandma'am spoke first, "No amount-"
Tigris reacted quickly, taking the old woman's hands and gently but forcefully leading her out of the room.
"Yes" Coriolanus spoke up, "It will be sufficient"
Hirudinea almost laughed. It was funny how quick Coriolanus was to sell her body out for the right price.
"You're really willing to do this for Sej and I, Mr. and Mrs. Plinth?" The girl asked, excited.
"We're all going to be family soon, Dinea. It's what we do," Mrs. Plinth gave a warm smile.
"Thank you so much! Sej and I will be eternally grateful for this." She hugged Sejanus, who gladly received her.
Mrs. Plinth continued, "And call me Ma; your little one will be calling you that soon, too."
Hirudinea's smile falters for a millisecond, and only Coriolanus seems to take notice of it.
It was then that the reality of what had just happened hit him.
He would go to university, Grandma'am would be taken care of, the apartment and taxes wouldn't be a drain, and Tigris would get to focus on herself for once.
By becoming pregnant with Sejanus's child, Hirudinea had saved her family from further ruin.
Coriolanus's anger faded and was replaced by something else,
Respect, maybe?
"Everything will be okay, baby. We're going to be a family," Sejanus whispered to Hirudinea, placing a hand on her stomach.
Strabo lifts his glass,
"A toast, to the expecting parents and to future collaborations between the Snow and Plinth families,…and maybe even to a wedding someday soon?"
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Coriolanus hadn't said much before leaving.
He congratulated Hirudinea and Sejanus and gave his cousin one last knowing nod, which she returned.
He stalked off to the car that was called for them; escorting Grandma'am away before she could disown her youngest granddaughter, who, unknown to her, was the family's saving grace.
Tigris lingered, conflicted with her emotions.
"Dinea," she called to her little sister who stood at her side near the car, "You know... I saw you a few months ago with the needle and the you-know-whats"
'Shit, how didn't I notice her? That fucking door!"
Hirudinea looked around, making sure the Plinths were far away.
"I don't know what you're talking about, sis," Hirudinea denied.
"I just don't understand why you did this."
The mother-to-be didn't like that one bit; how could her sister be confused about her motives?
"Isn't it obvious, Tigris? I wanted to do what you and Corio do. I wanted to help the family for once instead of always just taking."
"By attaching yourself to these nice people and using them? This isn't the way to do it—"
"So it's okay when you open your legs for a loaf of bread, but it's wrong when I do it to ensure our future?"
Hirudinea never liked hurting Tigris, but she was cornered.
She was always a bad sport.
"That's not— I just—Is it at least his baby?"
Tigris felt the need to ask. If her little sister could force a baby onto Sejanus, then what else could she do?
"Whatever baby I have will be Sejanus's child," Hirudinea stated.
That told Tigris everything she needed to know.
Her sister was fully content to use the poor boy to any end.
"Dinea," Sejanus said, walking up to them.
Hirudinea gave Tigris a look that said 'keep what you know to yourself,' before turning to smile at her boyfriend lovingly.
"It's been a long night; you should get some rest," Sejanus said with a big smile.
He'd been overjoyed since his father brought up marriage and she had to hold herself back from rolling her eyes.
She had no intention of tying herself to the Plinth's any further than with the baby.
"Yes, you're right, darling. I do feel a bit worn out. It must be the baby."
Sejanus placed a kiss on her lips. It was gentle and reminded Hirudinea of the one they shared when he'd walked her home that night, not so long ago.
Tigris sadly said her goodbyes and rushed to the vehicle.
As the car drove away, Tigris looked back one more time as Sejanus and Hirudinea walked past the doorway of the house.
The scene before her was of a boy head-over-heels in love with his pregnant girlfriend and the leech that would drain him without a second thought.
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"I love you" Sejanus told his girlfriend tenderly as they headed for his bedroom, she was familiar with the route at this point.
A room had been prepared for her, but it was just out of courtesy, as Mr and Mrs Plinth knew the couple would be sleeping in the same bed. It didn’t matter anyhow, their son had already gotten her pregnant.
Hirudinea looked around at the gaudy splendour of the Plinth home and all the things she would enjoy from now on; all the things her child may one day inherit if she plays her cards right.
She would have to redecorate eventually, but for now she was content.
Feeling euphoric, as she had accomplished her goals, for the first time Hirudinea said words she never in her life thought she would:
"I love you too, Sejanus"
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Please send asks about your thoughts on this relationship. I would love to know what you guys think about this whole dynamic, including their families.
Please like and reblog, if you feel like. Your feedback and interactions keeps me motivated XO
Taglist: @snowsgames @euphemiaamillais @darktrashsoulbear @buckleyverse
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bellaxgiornata · 1 year
Text
Falling For the Devil [Part eight: "The First Date"]
Pairing: Matt Murdock x Fem!Reader
Summary: You and Matt finally have a first date.
Or
Matt has you thinking about his ass. A lot.
[Series of one-shots about Reader meeting, falling for, and dating Matt Murdock.]
Warnings: 18+ for this series; contains humor, fluff, romance, angst, smut (like...a lot of it later in the series), language, some violence
Word Count: 4.7k
a/n: Just now realizing all of you on tumblr will not get to witness the novels in my end notes that a lot of y'all love to tease me about over on AO3...maybe that's for the best! Enjoy the cute fluffy first date between Reader and Matt! And you can find the list of installments that are currently posted on tumblr for this series here! Enjoy because there's literally so many more of these I have yet to transfer over...
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You were focused on sautéing the pan of vegetables while simultaneously keeping an eye on the pot of water you were waiting to reach a boil. 
It was Wednesday night, a few days after you’d returned from Foggy and Marci’s wedding. The pair of them were off at some island resort right now for the next two weeks for their honeymoon. After returning home the other night, you hadn’t heard much from Matt; him and Karen had been swamped at the office without Foggy and you had begun to think the date he’d talked about for this weekend wasn’t going to happen at this point. 
You’d also been busy today at The Bulletin and were currently still a bit frazzled from all of the run around. Some last minute political drama had occurred and Ellison had called for an all-hands-on-deck approach, which had meant you’d gotten off work late. Though Katy hadn’t missed her opportunity to grill you again about the weekend, and then she’d grilled you quite in depth about just how great of a kisser Matt really was. 
The pot on the stove decided it had reached a boil at almost the exact same time your phone started to ring on the counter behind you. With a huff you turned and quickly snatched the phone off of the counter, not bothering to check the screen to see who was calling before accepting the call. You assumed it was once again Katy with with more news on the political drama front and another excuse to grill you about Matt. You immediately wedged the phone between your ear and shoulder as you grabbed the box of soba noodles from beside the stove.
“So help me if you ask me about his ass one more time, Katy,” you said, tearing open the box of noodles, "I'm going to steal your yogurt. And I know how protective you are over your yogurt."
“Who’s ass?” Matt’s curious voice came through the line. “Mine? Or do I need to be concerned about competition?”
You nearly yelped when you heard his voice, dropping the noodles a bit too abruptly into the boiling water so that some of the water splashed onto your arm.
“Son of a bitch,” you cursed under your breath, pulling your arm back and rubbing where the water had burned you.
“Sweetheart?” Matt asked over the line.
“Sorry, I–I thought you were Katy,” you muttered, embarrassed. “And I just felt the vengeful wrath of some boiling water.”
“You okay?” he asked in concern.
“Yeah, fine,” you answered, stirring the pot of noodles.
He cleared his throat, the tone of his voice becoming a mixture of cocky and amused when he spoke again. “So you’re discussing my ass I take it?” he asked.
You paled, turning your back to rest against the counter as you awkwardly bit your thumbnail. “Katy was asking about my weekend at the wedding, and I told her that we…kissed.”
“Ahh,” he responded. “But what does that have to do with my ass?”
You rolled your eyes feeling your cheeks burn with embarrassment. “Nothing, she just didn’t believe nothing more happened with us sharing a bed. So she’s been asking me a million questions.”
“About my ass?” he pressed.
“Oh my God,” you breathed out, a hand rubbing at your forehead nervously as you cringed. “You have a really nice ass, Matt, okay? Is that what you wanted to hear me say?” 
“Do I?” he teased in a smug tone. “I wouldn’t know, I can’t see it.”
“You’re doing this on purpose, aren’t you?” you asked him flatly.
“A little,” he admitted. “But you sound distracted, what’s wrong?”
“You heard the news today, right?” you asked him, chewing your nail again.
“That scandal? With the senator?” he clarified.
“Mhmm, yeah. It’s been a crazy day at the office because of it. I just got home a bit ago,” you told him.
“I’m sorry, is this a bad time to call?” he asked.
“No, no you’re fine,” you assured him. “I’m just a little all over the place." You continued to anxiously gnaw on your nail, brows creasing together as you eyed the outdated tile of your kitchen floor. "What’d you call for? Not that I don't, you know, enjoy you calling,” you quickly added, "I just assumed there was a reason since I know you've been swamped, too."
“I wanted to see if you were still interested in going out this weekend,” he told you. “Saturday night? For dinner?”
“Oh,” you said, pleasantly surprised and thrilled that the date was indeed still happening. You opened your mouth to answer, but the sound of water loudly boiling over and the flames of the burner hissing under the pot drew your attention back to the noodles you’d been cooking. “Shit, no,” you groaned, racing over to the stove and lowering the flame before grabbing a spoon.
“No?” Matt asked hesitantly.
“What?” you asked distractedly, stirring the noodles.
"No you don't want to go out Saturday night with me?" he questioned carefully.
You shook your head quickly, setting the spoon back down. "No, no I meant yes," you told him.
"I am thoroughly confused now," he said with a faint chuckle.
You inhaled deep before blowing out the breath, trying to focus your mind on the conversation. "Yes, Matt, I would really like to go out with you Saturday night. Sorry, I got distracted with a pot of noodles."
"More or less distracted than you are by my ass?" he teased.
" Matt ," you nearly hissed, embarrassed. 
He laughed lightly over the line and you couldn't fight the smile on your face at the sound despite your embarrassment. 
"Sorry, I couldn't resist," he said, his laughter dying down. "How does that Thai restaurant by my place sound? I know you like it."
You smiled, nerves flooding your stomach at the thought of a date with him this weekend. "It sounds great," you answered softly. 
"I can meet you at your place," he offered. "At seven? We can walk there and I can walk you home?"
"That honestly sounds perfect," you replied. 
"Good, because I'm looking forward to it," he admitted, a smile in his voice.
"I am too, Matt. I really– motherfucker ," you cursed under your breath when the pot began to boil over again. "These damn noodles tonight!"
Matt barked out a laugh over the phone as you stirred the pot again, momentarily lowering the flame. 
"I'm going to stop distracting you," he said. "I'll see you Saturday at seven?"
"As long as I haven't burned my apartment down with these damn noodles," you answered. "I'll see you Saturday."
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You chewed the bite of pad thai, thoughtfully thinking over the question Matt had posed. After a moment you swallowed, finally having an answer.
"Waitress," you said.
Matt snickered, dark brows rising above his glasses. "Wow, you were aiming high," he teased. 
"I was nine!" you shot back. "And the question was the weirdest thing you wanted to be when you grew up. They seemed nice, how was I supposed to know it wasn't a viable career choice?" You gestured your chopsticks at Matt as you asked, "What about you?"
"Dog groomer," he answered. 
"Wow, pretty quick with that one," you joked. "Just because you liked dogs?"
"Yeah," he answered, his chopsticks picking up some noodles from his plate. "Before the heightened senses, too. Probably would be torture to endure that now." He pulled a face. "Wet dog is not a pleasant smell, I can assure you."
You lightly tapped your chopsticks to your lips, eyes narrowed as you tried to think of another ridiculous question for the strange game you'd found yourselves in. "If you could have a lifetime supply of anything, what would it be?" you finally asked.
His head tilted to the side as he chewed, brows furrowing behind the red lenses. You picked up more noodles and tossed them into your mouth.
"Coffee," he answered. "I pretty much live on that now."
"Mmm, don't we all," you mumbled.
"Your turn to answer," he pointed out, shooting you a grin from across the table.
"Coffee was a good answer but…” you trailed off for a moment in thought. “I don't know, the only things I can think of would be terrible unless they were magically healthy," you decided.
"Like what?" he asked curiously.
"Mint ice cream, but a lifetime supply sounds like a terrible dietary decision," you replied.
Matt snorted into his water cup as he took a drink. "Why mint ice cream?" he asked as he set the glass back down. "Mint is like the toothpaste of the dessert world."
Your jaw dropped, your chopsticks full of noodles hovering just before your mouth. " Excuse me ?" you asked in mock offense. "Mint is literally the best combination with chocolate."
Matt chuckled, shaking his head. "I think you mean to say peanut butter is," he corrected. 
You shot him a flat look, lowering the chopsticks. "I said what I said, Matt."
"Alright, alright," he appeased, holding a hand up. "I suppose it means you'll at least taste like toothpaste when I kiss you afterwards."
Your cheeks reddened as your eyes dropped down to your plate, your chopsticks nervously pushing a few noodles around a piece of tofu.
"Kissing me still makes you nervous?" he asked curiously, his own chopsticks lowering as he focused on you across the table, his head tilted to the side.
Your left hand tucked a few loose strands of hair behind your ear, your gaze still on the plate before you. "I mean, sort of. But also, I'm now paranoid about the fact that I'm eating this and you’re probably going to think I have terrible breath afterwards," you admitted. 
Matt snorted a laugh, shaking his head. “No, really, I won’t. If anything you’re just going to taste exactly like the pad thai you’re eating,” he told you. “And lucky for you, I quite enjoy pad thai.” He shot you a coy smirk across the table, one that had the heat rising up from your neck to your cheeks. “I quite enjoy it a lot, actually.”
You swallowed hard, your eyes dropping back down to your plate. “I get a feeling you’re not talking about pad thai here,” you muttered nervously.
“No, I’m not,” he agreed.
Your eyes flew up from under your lashes, gazing at him nervously across the table. He stared at you behind the red lenses of his glasses for a long moment, neither of you eating. You could feel your breath coming in short under his stare. Half of you wanted to climb into his side of the booth and finish what you'd almost started Sunday morning in the hotel room, the other half of you wanted to go hide in the women's restroom for ten minutes trying to calm your racing heart and nerves.
Thankfully Matt cleared his throat, readjusting his glasses on his face and going back to his food. You felt the tension in your shoulders lessen now that his gaze had been diverted, as if he’d done that on purpose. Which, considering he was probably reading your body like a confusing book, he probably did.
“What’s your go-to excuse for getting out of plans?” he asked, scooping up more noodles and continuing the strange game of questions.
You tapped your chopsticks nervously on your plate for a moment, trying to recover from whatever that had just been. “You trying to keep it in mind in case I use it on you?” you asked him with a nervous laugh.
He grinned as he chewed, shrugging a single shoulder. “Maybe,” he answered.
“Depends,” you began to sheepishly admit, “I usually say I have a dentist appointment I forgot about.”
“But that wouldn’t work on a Sunday,” he pointed out.
“Well I guess people don’t think of calling me on Sundays with things I want to get out of,” you joked back.
Matt shot you a playful look across the table as he leaned forward and asked, “Do you want to go skydiving with me this coming Sunday?”
“Hmm,” you said, exaggeratedly tapping your chin with a finger. “I’m pretty sure I’ve got a dentist appointment on Sunday. You know, my dentist works twenty-four seven so I’m definitely not available.”
“Sounds like a busy man,” Matt teased with a suggestive smile.
Your eyes widened and you ducked your head, snorting out a laugh. Quickly you threw up a hand to cover your mouth.
“You don’t need to hide your laugh,” he told you, raising a hand and gesturing towards you. “I notice you often cover your face when you do. I think the little snorts are cute.”
“And just like that I feel like a farm animal,” you half-joked under your breath, face burning up.
He shook his head, his attention returning to his food. “You don’t need to be so self-conscious. I’ve heard that laugh a lot over this past year and I love it every time I do.”
You raised a hand to your burning cheeks, your ears definitely picking up on the way he’d said he loved it and not liked it. Nervously licking your lips, you asked him, “So what’s your usual go-to excuse?”
“Usually just that I lost track of time,” he admitted. “Which is easy to do when you can’t see the time plastered everywhere like everyone else can.”
Your cheeks were still burning as you tried to think of another question, and then your brain came up with something ridiculous and you blurted, “Would you rather fight a single horse-sized duck, or one-hundred duck sized horses?” 
Matt sat up abruptly in the booth, his head momentarily turning to the side as he eyed you. “That is a…very interesting question.”
“In the year that you’ve known me,” you asked him, “would you honestly expect anything else?”
He chuckled and shook his head. “No, and I’d be disappointed with anything less. I’d go with the horse-sized duck. Even though that’s terrifying to think of a duck that large attacking me.”
Your eyes narrowed as you took a sip of water, swallowing the liquid quickly before you set the glass back down. “You’ve told me you fought ninjas," you pointed out, "but a horse-sized duck is what terrifies you?”
“The one-hundred duck-sized horses attacking me would actually be more terrifying,” he admitted.
“Agreed,” you said. “I’d have much more luck running from a single giant angry duck.”
Matt’s hand reached across the small table, searching for a moment along the surface for the hand you had resting near your plate. Hesitantly you slid it closer to him, allowing him to grab it. His large, warm hand fully covered yours, a strange feeling stirring in your chest at the contact. As you stared at your connected hands, your heart began to beat a bit faster. Slowly your eyes slid up to Matt’s face where he was clearly fighting back a laugh. The sight only further stirred that strange feeling in your chest.
“I’ll protect you from the giant ducks, sweetheart,” he promised you, looking like he was fighting a losing battle with his laughter.
“Much appreciated,” you said with a grin.
Dinner continued on with the two of you finishing your game of questions before discussing how work had been this week. You'd told him more about the scandal that you were still hovering over your phone for news on, and Matt had told you about some of the things he was juggling while Foggy was on his honeymoon. Over this past year you'd already gotten to know most of the normal first date questions about each other's careers, families, and hobbies–which for Matt really just consisted of dressing up as Daredevil and beating criminals. You knew he'd intentionally tried to keep things light because you'd admitted to being nervous when he'd picked you up. Though, you were sure he was already aware of that before you even told him.
You were leading him out of the restaurant with his hand holding the crook of your arm now, a large smile on both of your faces. You’d enjoyed dinner and the jokes back and forth, and judging from how much laughing Matt had been doing, you’d assumed he’d enjoyed dinner, too.
"Hang on, let me get the door," you said, moving towards it once you’d reached the exit.
Matt gently tugged your arm back, shooting you a charming smile that had your stomach flipping as he released his hold on you and stepped forward, pressing his hand into the door and opening it for you.
"Maybe I want to get it for you this time," he pointed out as you stepped through. 
"Thank you," you said softly, stepping outside.
The night was warm as you awkwardly crossed your arms over your chest. Matt released the door and joined you on the sidewalk, holding out one of his hands towards you while the other held tight to his cane.
"I've walked you home or to your office countless times before," Matt said, "and I've always wanted to just hold your hand instead of your arm. Would that be okay?"
Your eyes fell to his awaiting hand. Without even having to think about it, you easily slipped your hand into his, enjoying the way the smile stretched further across Matt’s mouth when you did. He pulled you closer towards him, your shoulders brushing as he began to lead you both back towards your apartment. You were too busy gnawing on your lip, overly aware of each of his fingers interlocked between yours and wondering if you’d get an opportunity to kiss him again before the night ended–even if you were still worrying about having pad thai breath–to think of something to talk about.
“I enjoyed your company this evening,” Matt said, breaking the silence after a few minutes had passed.
“I enjoyed your company, too,” you admitted.
Matt’s hand gently squeezed yours and you smiled, your attention turning on him. His cane was lightly tapping along the sidewalk in front of him and there was a large smile spread across his own face underneath his glasses. He looked happy and that made your heart flutter in your chest. His gaze abruptly turned on you as he walked, the full weight of that bright smile nearly knocking you off your feet. 
“I like you,” Matt admitted. “Quite a lot, actually.”
“I like you, too, Matt,” you whispered.
His hand squeezed yours again and your stomach practically somersaulted in response. Briefly you wondered if he could hear some version of what he was doing to you.
“Enough to get me a second date?” he asked hopefully, his brows rising behind his glasses.
You laughed lightly, your eyes landing on the sidewalk in front of you as you walked. “Yes, definitely enough to get you a second date,” you agreed.
“Too early to ask for a third date?” he asked.
You laughed a little harder, your apartment building unfortunately coming into view as you did. “You might want to see if you still want that after a second date,” you told him.
“I’m already trying to plan a fourth date, actually,” Matt teased you.
Your cheeks flushed yet again this evening. How was it possible this wonderful man liked you so much? And how the hell had it taken you so long to realize it?
“This is me,” you mumbled, coming to a stop in front of your building. 
The two of you paused on the sidewalk, you turning and reluctantly releasing his hand as you faced him. You glanced up at him, your heart racing as you chewed the inside of your cheek. Should you invite him up? Were you even ready for what that actually entailed? Was he? You’d been wanting to sleep with Matt for so long, but now that the possibility of it was glaring you in the face, you were nervous. When was the last time you’d shaved? Was there a way to brush your teeth first so he didn’t just taste pad thai when he kissed you? Could he tell you hadn’t had a chance to do the dishes yet if he came up? Were your non-silk sheets going to be too scratchy for him to want to have sex on? Would he–
“Sweetheart, I can practically feel your body working itself up with a thousand thoughts at once,” he said lightly, his voice cutting through all the noise in your head.
You smiled sheepishly back at him, your arms nervously crossing over your chest again. “How can you possibly tell that?”
“Your heart rate increased the moment you let go of my hand,” he told you, a finger pointing at your chest. “Your blood pressure is elevated as well your body temperature. You’re rigid and you’ve been chewing the side of your mouth for a minute now nonstop. I can smell the adrenaline coming off you in waves.”
“Sorry,” you murmured.
He shook his head, stepping towards you and placing a hand on your shoulder. “Don’t apologize, just take a deep breath. You don’t need to be so nervous,” he assured you.
“Easier said than done,” you muttered.
“What’s got you so worked up?” he asked.
That question had you even more nervous. You couldn’t exactly lie because Matt would know–not that you wanted to lie to him. But telling him you were standing here wondering if you should ask him to come up to your apartment, which you were sure would translate to having sex, had made you wonder if your legs were recently shaved enough or if he’d find them prickly with his extra senses. Or that–
“Sweetheart,” Matt said, an amused smile on his face. “You’re doing it again.”
“Right, yeah, sorry,” you mumbled. Opting for the truth you said, “I was just contemplating inviting you up.”
“Were you?” he asked slowly, still smiling in amusement. “And apparently that has your body going into fight or flight?”
“Apparently,” you muttered under your breath, nervously tucking hair behind your ear.
Matt opened his mouth, about to speak, but the sound of your ringtone swiftly cut him off. You watched his mouth close, his head tilting to the side. You cringed, internally cursing whoever was calling you right now though you assumed it was probably work. You reached into your purse and pulled out your phone. Sure enough it was Katy calling you.
“It’s work,” you said with a sigh. “That scandal has really been a pain in my ass this week.”
“I can wait if you need to answer it,” he told you.
“I probably should with what’s been going on,” you told him reluctantly. “Normally I’d ignore it, though. This just feels rude.”
He waved a dismissive hand, shooting you a smile. “I can wait a few minutes, really,” he assured you.
“I’ll just be a moment,” you said. You stepped a half step back, turning to face the street as Matt stood nearby. “What’s going on, Katy?” you asked into the phone. “The office better be on fire or something right now.”
“No, but this story is,” Katy said over the line. “So the senator’s mistress has finally been named and there’s a prostitution rumor going around that’s about to be corroborated. Ellison needs everyone back in for a quick re-work before the paper hits the printers tonight. I tried my best to cover for you because I know you had that hot date,” she said, and you instantly heard Matt chuckle beside you, no doubt hearing everything she was saying, “but I couldn’t cover for you much longer. You’re needed. Ellison will probably murder you himself if you’re not here soon.”
Your eyes snapped shut, your shoulders slumping. Well that ruined your plans of potentially sleeping with Matt. 
“I’ll be there in fifteen,” you told her.
“Great, I’ll let bossman know,” Katy answered. “And hey, are you still with Hell’s Kitchen’s sexiest attorney-at-law?”
Your cheeks reddened as you heard Matt chuckle beside you again. “Yes, Katy, I need to hang up so I can say goodbye,” you told her impatiently.
“Right, well, can you do me a favor and ask him how much for a baker’s dozen?” she asked.
Your eyes narrowed as you stared at the ground before you. “What?” you asked her. “I’m not following.”
She scoffed on the line and you imagined her rolling her eyes at you. “Come on, that man has a whole ass bakery back there, girl.”
Your eyes closed as you heard Matt bark out a laugh beside you. Katy quickly cursed over the phone before laughing herself.
“Shit, did you accidentally have me on speakerphone?” she asked, still laughing.
“No, but I might as well have,” you muttered under your breath. “I’m going to hang up and see you in fifteen. Can you please refrain from discussing my date’s ass the rest of the evening?”
“Probably not,” she answered instantly. “See you soon. Grab a handful of cake for me on your way over.”
“Fucking hell,” you cursed, hanging up the phone and stuffing it into your purse.
Matt was still laughing as you awkwardly turned towards him, embarrassed even though you technically hadn’t done anything.
“I like her, she’s amusing,” Matt said. “Though I don’t know why she’s so into my ass.”
“Because you have a nice ass,” you mumbled, noticing his smile widen. “But I unfortunately have to get back to the office, as you heard.”
“Well then I guess this is where I say goodnight, unless you’d like me to walk you?” he offered.
You shook your head quickly. “No, really, it’s two blocks and I’ll probably grab a taxi back after. I’ll be fine.”
“Well, can you text me when you get there and back home later?” he asked. “I don’t care what time it is. I’ll worry otherwise.”
“I suppose I don’t need you throwing on your suit and hunting me down,” you joked lightly. “Yeah, I can text you.”
Matt closed the distance between the two of you, a warm smile on his face. “I had a good night and I look forward to doing it again with you,” he said softly.
“Me too,” you admitted.
“Do I need to give you a warning before I kiss you so you don’t run away on me?” he joked. “Or am I at a point where I can just kiss you when I want to?”
“You can just–just kiss me,” you breathed out, your eyes instantly darting to his mouth.
“Good to know,” he whispered.
One of his hands reached out and lightly drew your face towards his. Your eyes fluttered closed just before his mouth was on yours. You could feel your stomach excitedly somersaulting inside of you, your hands hesitantly reaching up and landing on Matt’s dress shirt, steadying yourself against him. His mouth was somehow making you lightheaded with the way he was kissing you so sweetly, his lips moving carefully along yours. 
You felt his other hand at your lower back, drawing you in closer towards him until your hands snaked their way around his neck, your chests lightly pressed together. You were certain he could not only hear your heart hammering away in your chest now, but that he could probably feel it slamming into his own through the front of your shirt. 
Eventually he broke away, resting his forehead to yours. You saw the smile on his face and couldn't resist your own in return. 
"Tonight was perfect," he whispered. "I'll call you soon to find another time to go out?"
Your bottom lip rolled into your teeth as you nodded your head. Matt pulled his forehead from yours, soon replacing it with a warm, lingering kiss from his lips.
"Text me so I know you're safe?" he reminded me.
"I will, Matty," you promised. 
He pulled away, your own arms falling back to your sides as he did. There was a cheeky smile that gradually spread over his face as he gazed down at you behind the dark glasses. 
"What?" you asked him after a moment, brows creasing together. 
"You need a slice of cake before you go?" he teased. 
Your face flamed as your jaw dropped, embarrassed to the point of speechlessness. Matt barked out a laugh as you tried to recover. Your hands flew to your face as you turned a fraction away from him, too embarrassed to even look at him.
"I'll be the one making front page of The Bulletin tomorrow," you said, voice muffled behind your hands. "For killing Katy."
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imyourbratzdoll · 5 months
Text
𝒂 𝒔𝒑𝒆𝒄𝒊𝒂𝒍 𝒄𝒉𝒓𝒊𝒔𝒕𝒎𝒂𝒔 𝒎𝒆𝒔𝒔𝒂𝒈𝒆 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝒚𝒐𝒖
🎄christmas masterlist🎄
hello, the christmas gang have come back to leave a special message for you. I will be holding a poll for your answers to go to. I hope you missed them as much as I did.
warning - slight angst, swearing, troublemaker elves.
the gif and headers I use aren't mine.
Warnings and Reminders - Please do not plagiarise, copy, repost/republish, adapt, or translate any of my work on any social media platforms, apps, or third-party sites. The only platforms I post my work on are: Tumblr and Wattpad. I do not own any character of any franchise (Marvel etc.) All my works are fiction and may be dark or triggering content: READ ALL WARNINGS BEFORE PROCEEDING.
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Rustling can be heard as the camera moves, shaky figures can be seen through the lens as it’s currently recording. The faint sound of a woman can be heard as she adjusts it, setting it up completely so that it rests on the floor in front of the fireplace. As the woman steps back, the faces and people become clearer.
There stands Mrs Claus (you) and Ari holding their two children as the elves and their children (with Mrs Claus) surround them and face the camera. Smiles and tears grace their features as it feels like years since they’ve talked to you (followers). The heartfelt moment only lasts a second as one elf steps forward, arms wide as he yells.
“We’re back bitches!” The other elves follow, and Ari shakes his head, glaring softly down at the little troublemaker.
“Johnny! Could you let us have a cute moment for once?” Johnny shakes his head shrugging, he walks forward and gets up close to the camera, grinning.
“Did you miss us? Boy, do we have some things to tell you!” He grunts as he’s pushed aside. “Hey!”
Jake sticks his tongue out before facing the camera. “Hi! I missed you so much! It’s been so boring since the last time we saw each other!” He throws his head back, groaning. Ignoring the rest of the others as he takes up the camera before a certain elf makes his way over and pouts, giving him his best puppy dog eyes. “Okay, okay! You don’t gotta look at me like that. Here!”
Steve grins, coming into view and presses his face right up close to the camera. “Hi!” His words come out smooshed, “Missed so much!” He hugs the camera as if you are there. “Oh, I gotta go for a second to let you have some time with the others! Bye!” He waves and grins, skipping off. 
Ransom stands, adjusting his coat. “We already know you missed me the most.” He rolls his eyes. “I bet you have been bored, waiting for me to appear. It’s understandable.” Without a goodbye, he walks off and let’s the next elf appear.
Frank appears and smiles, giving a small wave. “Hi! It’s been so long! I hope you are doing well!”
Lee steps in front of Frank, glaring at the camera. “Did they bring food? What’s the point of me saying hello if no one brought me food?” You shake your head, smiling, rocking your son back and forth. 
“Lee. Be nice, people like you and don’t ask me why. I wouldn’t know, but they do.” Lee turns and looks at you, offended. “I love you, sweetie. Completely different thing.”
Lee turns back toward the camera and continues to glare. “Well, if you came here because you ‘like’ me, then I guess I can talk to you. But, next time. I’d prefer food.” He rubs his chubby belly and waddles off. Probably in search of some donuts.
Curtis steps into frame, a dirty beanie on his head and a frown on his face. “Great, you’re back. Now we have to entertain.” He rolls his eyes, not happy with interacting with humans.
Lloyd makes his way over and pushes Curtis, smirking when the other grumpy elf glares at him. “Hello, my peasants!” 
“Fucking hell, Lloyd. They are not your peasants, if anything, you’re theirs.” Ari facepalms, wondering how you convinced him to keep them. 
“Pfft, me a peasant? Please, maybe when hell freezes over.” He strokes his moustache, imagining what it would be like if hell actually froze over and he got his wish. 
Ari shakes his head, “okay, move along. Move along.” His hand scoops across the floor, moving the small elf along with a soft push and then his full attention is on the camera. “Hello friend!” He warmly greets, sending the screen a wide grin. “We have missed you, the year has been rough without you. I personally hope you enjoy this Christmas special we have made.” A small giggle escapes his daughter in his arms, catching his attention and he smiles, pinching her cheeks softly. Her hands come up to play with his greying beard. 
You smile, tickling your daughter’s feet before paying attention to your little boy. “You missed a lot while we were gone.” You look up, smiling sadly (because they missed you) at the camera. “As you can see, we’ve been blessed with more of these little munchkins. But there is more news…” You are interrupted by the door opening and a sheepish Bucky walks in.
“Sorry, sorry. I didn’t want to be late, there was a thing with the Who’s and then the elves spotted a lolly shop.” He rolls his eyes, remembering what hell that was. “I hope I’m not too late?” He continues to walk over, holding his baby boy in one arm. He leans down and pecks your forehead, giving Ari a nod.
“You’re not late, you are just in time.” You beam up at him before looking back at the camera. “As you can see, Bucky has grown a lot.” He huffs, pouting down at you. “Oh.” Your eyes widened, “Did you say that the elves spotted a lolly shop?” You looked back up at Bucky with a bewildered expression. “Crap… They will be running a muck right now.” You begin to chew on your bottom lip, hoping they aren’t wrecking the house too much.
Ari leans over and kisses your head. “Don’t worry, my love. I have them handled.” You breathe a sigh of relief as you realise, he’s used his magic before anything could be damaged.
“Thank god.” You look back at the camera. “So sorry about that. As you may have heard, we have some new elves, but they are not ready to be fully introduced to you, yet. They are definitely…” You think, trying to find the right word.
“Pieces of shit!” Lee grunts as he enters the room again with a mouth full of food. “Don’ know why we even need them! Got us.” 
Ari stares down at the small elf. “Lee, language. Also, you guys barely do any work, I have to literally bribe you so I can have presents done by Christmas.” He grumbles, pinching the bridge of his nose. 
A scoff can be heard, and Ari’s attention turns toward Lloyd. “Please, we do so much work, I think we should be getting a raise with how much work we actually do.” He strokes his moustache, staring up at Ari, raising a brow as if challenging him. “What are you gonna do, big guy? Step on me.”
“Don’t push it.” Ari mumbles, sighing softly when you reach over and rub his back. “Shall we put the kids to bed before continuing, my love?” You nod, telling the elves to behave as you gather all the children with the help of Ari and Bucky, and exit the room. 
Lloyd grins evilly toward the camera. “Oh, Stevieeee. Look, there’s pretty lights over there.” Lee and Curtis join in, watching the giddy elf sparkle with excitement. 
“Where?!” Jake and Frank shake their heads, trying to warn Steve to not fall for it. Ransom stands behind them all with a glare on his face, ready to seek revenge if they hurt his secret (not so secret) best friend. Steve wanders forward, heading toward the direction the grumps pointed towards. “Oh cool!” Steve exclaims as he opens the little door before a short shout escapes him when he’s pulled in by the sugar crazed elves. “Ah!”
Jake and Frank glare, “What the hell?! Why’d you do that?!” They try to run forward to help, but Lee and Curtis block them.
Lloyd shrugs. “I don’t know, I was bored and he’s so gullible.” All five of the elves noses scrunch when the smell of fire reaches their nostrils. “The hell is that?” 
They turn and their eyes widen when they spot Ransom next to a pile of the three elves favourite things on fire. Lee’s chocolate stash, Lloyd’s polos and Curtis’s beanies. “Whoops, I guess my finger slipped.” He stares down the three, allowing Jake and Frank to quickly retrieve Steve from the other elves, his hair all dishevelled and eyes sad. 
“There were no lights…” He pouts, Steve walks over to Ransom and stands next to him, watching the pretty flames. “Ooo, those are pretty.” He gives his best friend a smile.
You, Ari and Bucky enter the room again and you stop. “Ransom… Why is there a fire on the floor?”
Ransom shrugs. “Revenge.” You nod, ignoring it and heading toward the couch and taking a seat, both Bucky and Ari taking a seat beside you while the elves head over and begin to crawl up your body, finding their favourite spots to sit.
“Okay, we are back! We would like to thank you for being a part of our story, this has been a great journey for us, and we’ve been talking.” You look around you at the people who surround you. “How would you feel if we made Christmas a year long thing? Just for you.” You and the rest of the Christmas gang hold your breaths, awaiting the answer.
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💌your answer💌
thank you for reading!
feedback and reblogs are greatly appreciated.
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sh1-n0bu · 2 years
Text
✿ 𝙪𝙣𝙚𝙭𝙥𝙚𝙘𝙩𝙚𝙙 ✿
Character: Vampire! Scaramouche x Reader
Warning: Blood, biting, nudity (but nothing too nsfw, y’all just open your button up shirts), cursing, angst, fluff, hurt/reverse comfort, gn! reader, Scaramouche might be a bit OOC here, Victorian!AU, a bit of everything lmao
no beta-read, we die like my will to live
first time actually writing on Tumblr low-key nervous ngl🤭
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‘Whew, what a long day. But at least I managed to sell a lot tod-‘ hearing a glass shatter as you were closing up your tiny herbs and medicine shop was definitely not the way you wanted to finish your night. Your little shop was the only one that sells medicine in this small town without charging for extra moras unlike the big, famous ones the rich people like to go to. Everyone in this small town was forever grateful and respectful to you and your shop. Whenever your new boxes of goods would come, the people would always lend you a hand without you asking for it, and for that you were always grateful. So when your shop’s second floor window suddenly got broken in by a short man with a noble people clothes, you were greatly surprised. But now was not the time because he was bleeding and you don’t enjoy letting blood get everywhere unless it’s the small surgery room.
“Sir! Sir, can you hear me? Sir? I need you to get up so i can carry you to the surgery room!” shaking his shoulders while asking him basic questions, you definitely know his still alive because he still had a pulse. Before you can forcefully drag him like a corpse to the lower floor, the man yanked you down to the floor and straddled your waist.
“Hey! What do you think your doing?!” usually you’re not one for violence but if he was drunk off his ass and was thinking of molesting you, he’s got a rough, calloused hand to be slapped by.
“Shut up… I don’t h-have enough time… for your stupid babbling… nonsense…” before you can question what he was mumbling about the stranger tore off your cravet tie and had placed his mouth on your neck.
“You-?! Get off of me this instant you- Ow!” when you tried to kick him off, the stranger pinned your hands down and bit your neck harshly. You can already feel blood pouring out and it was not pleasant. Through all of your suffering the man was sucking and licking the blood off, almost like a depraved animal and you swore you could feel something akin to animal fangs penetrating your neck before your vision started to have black dots in the corner and you passed out due to blood loss.
When you woke up the next morning with a perfectly bandaged neck and your assaulter coming into the small attic room with something to eat and drink, you were ready to throw hands. It didn’t matter to you if he was some rich, snobby, nobleson or even the son of the queen. For all you care, this son of a bitch bit your neck so hard to the point he drew blood and caused you to pass out.
“Oh, you’re awake. Now before you start screaming your lungs off like a banshee let me explain myself first”
“And why the hell should I? You son of a bitch bit me like a fucking animal!” he chuckled at that. Now that you actually took a closer look at him, he was a rather odd looking fellow. There wasn’t anything rare or monstrous about his looks but, there was just something odd about him. And one thing you learned from years of running and managing a shop all by yourself is to trust your guts.
“Well you’re an interesting little thing. I have never met a human who reacts like you after what happened. But if you want me to explain myself then you have to keep your mouth shut little mouse”. You certainly didn’t like the way he referred to you. Like some kind of an insect, some kind of a toy that’s for his amusement who will later on get thrown away if he lost interest in you. But as long as he doesn’t get a centimeter closer, then you’re willing to cooperate.
“Fine. But if you get closer to me I won’t hesitate to smack you out of the window you broke last night” he laughed dryly at that. Seems like he was getting more and more amused by you and your choice of words.
“Oh, you’re an interesting one little mouse. Makes me want to keep toying with you like this. So little mouse…” he stalked closer to you despite what you had just said and leaned down to look at you right in the eyes. You didn’t like it. Not one bit. You wanted to punch him in his face and knock his teeth in but moving has never felt harder and your limbs has never felt like tons of bricks before. So you decided to challenge him and stared right back. The stranger’s stormy violet eyes seemed to darken and swirl. Getting uncomfortably close to your face he asked
“…Do you believe in vampires?”
It has already been 11 months since your run in with Scaramouche. Ever since he dropped the bomb that yes, vampires are very much real and not just some fairytale told by story-tellers and your parents to keep you awake at night you and Scaramouche had started some odd relationship. He would come by every now and then, through the door thankfully, and stay the night or a few in an exchange of helping you out with your shop. You would sometimes teach him a thing or two about herbs, medicines, wound treatment and he would talk about his kin and about himself if he feels like it. And on some nights, he would tear off your tie, forcefully pin you down and suck your blood until you passed out then in the morning you would scold him as he treats the bitemarks that he caused. It was a very strange relationship, the two of you had. More intimate than friends but not intimate enough to be considered lovers. Reading each other like an open book but also not exactly knowing what each other do or even enjoy. It was an odd line Scaramouche and you two were threading on.
The bells that hung above your hole in the corner shop’s doors jingled softly as someone came in. The medic knew who it was for this had happened all too frequently. A creaking of the woods sounded closer and closer until the person plotted down on the couch of the backrooms. Finishing up cleaning some jars and boxes, the medic saw the very same vampire they formed an odd relationship with over the last 11 months.
“How was the trip?”
“Fucking tiring” came the groan of Scaramouche. Snickering at his dramatic self, they handed him a cup of tea. The vampire gulped down the whole cup of tea, ignoring how his throat burned. Setting the cup down Scaramouche got up from his seat confusing the shop-keeper.
“Are you leaving again this so-?” before they could finish their question, said vampire began taking off his clothes. Tailcoat, tie, blazer, white button down shirt all fell down on the couch he was sitting on.
Coughing into their gloves, the medic turned their face away hoping to conceal the blooming red on their face, trying to forget what just happened from their memory. Now, the medic was no prude and they got quite used to seeing half naked people due to some harsh injury treatments. But no man they ever performed on was as good-looking as the hot vampire standing in front of them.
“W-what do you think you’re doing? When the shop is still open none the less?” bringing a hand up to cover the side of their face so they won’t accidentally look at his half naked form, the shop owner tried to cool off their face.
Looking at the flustered medic, the vampire smirked, a very mischievous idea forming in his head. Taking the hand that was covering the side of their face, the purple-head looked up studying every detail. His smirk widens when your face gets redder, loving how he was teasing you. His other hand came up to hold your chin, leaning his face in closer and closer to yours, until he suddenly pushed you down on the couch. The hand that was holding yours pinning it down while the other works on taking off your tie and unbuttoning your button down shirt.
“Hey! What the hell do you think you’re doing now?!” grabbing the hand that was stripping you, your [c] eyes looked at his stormy purple ones.
“I’m thirsty. I’ve been away for a week and i’ve only been drinking animal blood and those were fucking disgusting”
“Then why did you take off your clothes dumbass?!”
“They were dirty” he was quite blunt with it. After looking in his eyes if he was lying or not - finding none - you sighed and slowly let go of his hand, letting him finish with his previous actions. Now basically both of you were half-naked.
Fuck, the sexual tension is too damn much, why isn’t he biting? By now he should be on his process of sucking you dry until you pass out but he wasn’t. Instead he was just looking down at you.
Scaramouche’s POV
Oh fuck. He had you like this before but at that time he was too blinded by his hunger he didn’t realize just how damn ethereal you are. Gently running his hands over your tummy and up your chest, he noticed how you shivered and your breath hitched under his fingertips.
Then he looked up at your face, how you were biting your lips and red you were in the face. Your gorgeous [c] eyes looking up at him, waiting for him to bite you, to take your blood, to mark your whole body as his-
‘Oh fuck. This is bad’
When the vampire first met you, he only became acquainted with you just to quench his thirst and hunger but over time he had gotten attached to you as more than just bloodbank. Not only were you understanding, you were also kind, thoughtful, hard-working, intelligent and down-right intoxicating. Then he remembered the dream he had a few nights ago. In that dream he had you just like this. You on your back, beneath him but the difference was that you two seemed more… intimate than whatever you two have going on now. But right now, it wasn’t a dream.
It was real.
You were underneath him, shivering from his cold fingers, red faced, looking up at him with those eyes he fell for. Gulping, Scaramouche leaned down to your neck but instead of what he always does, he started placing soft kisses up your throat and to your chin. He noted how you flinched, shutting your eyes and how your free hand came up to his shoulder not being able to decide if you should push him away or not.
‘Fuck. If you keep being so intoxicating like this how am I suppose to give up on you?’ Scaramouche thought while leaving gentle kisses around your neck and shoulders, sometimes leaving hickeys or gnawing at your skin just to feel you flinch or squirm.
‘Do you have any idea how much I wanted this? How much I wanted you beneath me like this? Flinching and squirming, wiggling and moaning as I make you mine? I wanted it so much I even fucking dreamt about it. I want you. I want you so badly [Name], can’t you see?’ kissing up to your neck once more he finally bit down on the same spot he always bites, sinking his fangs deeper and more harshly just so he can hear you bite back your pained groans and squirm in his hold.
‘I want you. I want you [Name]. I’m a monster that drains someone’s life away and you’re someone that saves others. We’re opposites and yet there’s a saying that goes opposites attract. I know I shouldn’t but I want that to be true so badly’ after gulping down some he retracted his fangs, looking down at you just to see you staring back at him with your soft smile and kind eyes.This snapped something in him as he bit down on the other side of your neck harshly, almost as if wanting to completely tear off your neck. The way his mood changed caused you to jolt and yelp loudly in pain.
‘Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop it. Stop looking at me like that. Stop smiling at me. Stop treating me like a human being or else… I will fall more deeper and I won’t be able to let you go’ Scaramouche stopped and moved away from you, panting and licking his mouth. Both sides of your neck were covered in blood, old and new bite marks littering it while you were panting, trying to recover from his last merciless attack. The sight made him tremble. He wanted you. He needed you. But you weren’t meant for him. He was a monster, you were a medic. He was a killer and you were a savior. Maybe it’ll be best if he just leave you behind and run far away-
A gentle hand on his cheek snapped him out from his spiraling dark thoughts. Looking at you, you were still wearing the same kind expression.
‘You being mine could never happen. But i’ll cherish every moment I share with you as long as you’d let me’ leaning in Scaramouche started cleaning your wounds then softly kissing and leaving hickeys on your upper body.
‘I could never have you’ another kiss ‘but I can’t help but yearn for you’ another bite ‘so i’ll stay here. Right by your side as long as you’d allow me to’
‘I love you. But i’ll kill this feeling over and over again if it means you will be safe and happy’
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xyfanficarchive · 11 months
Text
labor of love
norman bates (psycho 1960) taxidermies you (romantic) (gender neutral)
or, the strange mentally ill erotic fantasy of someone cutting me open and just getting all up in my guts (Nicely,) has surfaced from the old deep deep deep dark days of my life and now has a place ig?
cw death and detailed gore; cw fucked up content in general but if you saw this title and are still reading further you already know whats up, you sicko ;) this is unedited word vomit style typed directly into the tumblr post editor, bcs it was very very slow today and this was better than ruminating myself into an actual mental breakdown at freaking work so this is for the absolute freaks and please dont come for my ass if anything in the getting taxidermied by norman bates fanfiction isnt accurate
in thinking about the potential endings for an extended norman and reader romance... i think it would be such an extraordinarily delicate balance to manage a relationship and try to help him while avoiding the shitshow of human rights violations that was psychiatric care in the 1960s. and maybe you could manage it but if you couldn't......... perhaps he was hiding the true extent of his illness, even well into your relationship, even after getting married. some act of repression, of course he didn't want to scare you away and he was so certain he would, and nobody had ever loved him like you did and nobody ever would again. but ya just can't bottle it up like that without building and building the pressure... and to have a relationship, to have sex with you and marry you and try to be happy WITHOUT HER, oh what a grievous transgression to the ignored Norma, cast away to the far recesses of his awareness, he's managed to hold onto control for this long but the situation will simply not do, and she'll just have to eliminate the disgusting little bitch who stole her son away from her, take the reins back in a moment of weakness, of fracture -
and norman wakes up in a place he doesn't remember, in clothes he doesn't remember, but he remembers the fight and the fevered pitch of your voice, the wide-eyed fear in your face, his mixed up train of thought derailing, crashing, and the sound of his mother screaming in his ears. not a hint of a thought of what happened enters his mind as he retraces the trail of blood through the house, empty and automatic and despairing but still not connecting the ideas together until he actually finds the mangled heap of your body slumped on the floor, with the sick metallic smell of clotting blood, a dizzying lake of deep red bigger than he'd ever seen before surrounding you.... it's so shattering that he is disconnected even from the impulse to vomit, though he drops to his knees and screams and screams and screams...... and his mother is nowhere around to help him, and you're gone gone gone, forever! forever! but no! he hears your voice in his ear, soft though it startled him: "no, you can still save me, don't you remember? you've done it already before, norman, save me, save me before it's too late...!"
you're still even warm by the time he brings you down to the basement, cradling you in his arms and staining the clean clothes mother had gone out of her way to dress him in, still limp dead weight, he puts you on the table where he does his taxidermy and kisses your lips with blood on your mouth, pets your hair, coos a billion apologies. "oh my love, i should have never ever let this happen! i promised myself i would never let this happen to you that i would never let her hurt you im sorry im sorry im sorry i tried i tried!!" screwing his eyes shut at your body in front of him, crying tears that dripped onto your skin. and you shush him, your voice comes like a bell calling him in the darkness "i love you norman, i forgive you, but you must work fast now, you have to work fast to revive me!" he opens his eyes, far gone, nods fervently into your lifeless face, knowing that this would be very hard, and very easy, in that he had done it dozens of times before but not on this scale and not this fresh. he strokes the soft skin of your cheek, flits over to bring his tool kit near and then strips your body bare to begin his work - but he already has to stop, go up to the linen closet to bring towels and a bucket of water to clean the blood and gore off your skin, revealing in detail every grisly angry slash, stab, loose flap of skin that should still be all connected, should be, norman cries, with only an extremely dim awareness that it was his own hands that wrought this upon you. but he would fix it, he would suture your lovely flesh back together last, after the bulk of the work was done.
it takes significant effort to cut you with the same blade that he had cut birds and other small creatures with but he made it through all the layers of skin and fat and muscle, cut flaps to splay your belly open for easy access. and the inside of your body. explodes with colour and detail that he had never seen on this scale before. your insides were all shining red, and translucent membranous pink, with lipid yellows, greenish and brownish hues, pearlescent white fascia and winding lines of purple-blue connecting everything. and then he trembles all over seeing it his hands shaking violently, already slick with blood, as they approach the opening, and you comfort him, sweetly in his ear, "calm now, my love, i'm in good hands, i know i am, but you need to stop shaking, you need to be gentle." "i know, im just scared. i'm sorry, i'm so sorry..." "i trust you, norman." he steeled his nerves and then slips his hands oh so, so gingerly into the wet, the slick and smooth mess, the winding intestines, cold on the surface from contact with the air but still warm underneath, and he only loves you more and more and more that you trust him like this, that you let him do this to you, putting your faith in him to revive you.
he was struck by the intimacy of it, he was so close, closer than anyone else in the world had been to you, even closer than sex, up to his forearms in your body cavity, with all the beautiful unseen parts that had sustained your living body for so long, all those years........ you would have to learn a new kind of life now, with him. he scoops the intestines, they spill over the sides onto the table, attached at either end, and he realized he would have no place to actually put any of this once he removed it, he took the bucket with red translucent water and tipped it over into the floor drain. then, bringing it near, cuts your entire digestive tract free, placing it gently in the bucket. looking down at the heap inside, he feels a sheen of sweat on his forehead, and reached up to wipe it with the bloodied back of his arm. then, the pancreas, the kidneys and bladder, the liver (some cultures thought the liver was the seat of human love, he thinks), everything is so connected, tubes and gossamer-thin tissues that he has to dissect to separate the parts out. he has to reach underneath your ribcage to cut your lungs free, they sink in and deflate more as he works, and puts them too on top of the rest of your organs. then, last, your heart - he hesitates, and trembles, feeling the imperative to be especially delicate now, as if the muscle might disintegrate under his touch. but he feels around, remembering the anatomy diagram of the heart he'd learned so many many years ago, cuts free the three arteries connected to the aorta, the pulmonary vessels, both venae cavae, and suddenly he is holding the fist-sized organ free in his hand. he set his knife to the side and then reached in again, cradling the muscle in both of his broad palms as he brought it out into the light, letting out a shuddering breath - your heart! oh it was your actual heart, the heart that loved him, the heart that once beat in your chest, that he listened to countless nights to soothe himself, pressing his ear to your sternum. he sees the fatal gash the knife made, he turns his head and leans his ear in, though he knows it's silent anyways he almost starts to sob, "keep it," you say, and he startles "keep it, my love, it's yours, it was always yours" and he looks up into the ceiling "really? are you certain?" forgetting the anguish, and he feels your confirmation, your permission, as the warmth of your love. then, looks down at the deep red knot of muscle, presses a tender kiss there, and holds it to his chest, mirroring his own living heart. with reverence, he sets it on the table in his view and continues on -
it's best practice to remove the bulk of the skeletal muscle, too, and so he opens the skin on the arms that held him close, the legs and thighs that he'd had bliss between, and frees the long corded masses - the ones in the limbs come out of the body clean and compartmentalized, attached to the bone really only by two tendons on either end, separating easily from each other. this was by chance one of the largest buckets he had in the house but now it was full top with all your externalized insides, and the slippery smooth remainder of your muscles went to the floor - it was only a short distance to the furnace anyways, and all of this would have to go to the furnace, into the fire, you wouldn't be needing them anymore, and everything would have to be clean, clean, clean after. and now your body was ready for treating with the chemicals - there might not be enough, but it would have to do - and the sawdust which only seemed to come in large quantities, and it's easy, easy, art to craft the contours of your body that he learned, he knows from memory. he closes with care the long incisions he had made, making the flesh edges meet neatly all down the length of your limbs, up the i-shape he made on your abdomen and then, the awful wounds, slashes and gashes all over he sutures at last with a lingering feeling of sorrow, that dissipates when, finally cutting the last thread, he sees the miracle of life bloom forth on your face out from the monochrome of death "norman!" you smiled, with recognition in your eyes from where your head was limply rolled to the side
he smiled back at you, euphoria like a thrill of electricity tingling through his body as he reached out to cup your face - of course the fact he didn't have a sufficient amount of preservatives and anything didn't matter because it had little to do with the process of reviving anyways. it was all in the effort itself, in the way he marked his own soul in order to remake you and have you forever, it was in that labor of love where the actual transformation was made. he stroked his thumbs on your cheekbones, leaning over you and sobbing out "yes, yes, yes, yes, it's me, i'm here!!"
"you did it, i knew you could, i knew you would save me, norman."
"i could do anything for you, i would do anything for you!"
"i'm so cold now down here in the basement, i feel so weak and exhausted after everything... would you please help me get dressed?"
your bloody clothes were all heaped on the floor and he sniffled, blinking the tears from his eyes. "oh, those are all completely ruined..... I'm sorry... I'll take you up to the bedroom now, okay? and we'll get you into pajamas, and then you can just sleep for however long you need." and you would need the sleep - it was a strange and difficult new life to adjust to, being so dependent on him now for so many things, and you would never be able to leave the house anymore, which would likely be as hard for you as it was at first for his mother. but might get easier for you faster, he thought, as you had both found many more interesting things to do inside than he and his mother ever had in nearly thirty years until you came along. he kisses you on the forehead, and gently lets your head down, before he shifts his arms underneath you and scoops you up in a bridal carry, the whole weight of you in his arms as he carries you up the stairs to the main floor, then turned, climbing up and up again
"i was so scared when she killed me, Norman." Your voice makes his lip tremble as he looks down into your eyes, "but I know i'm safe now with you."
"Yes, you're safe here with me... You'll be safe here with me forever..."
He can feel the vibration of love coming off you, that keen resonation, it was always always there though he never managed to put it to its name, his heart absolutely swells with the sensation, love, pure ecstatic love! you were his one love and the most precious thing he had ever encountered in his life and now he could keep you safe from everything, forever, with him! oh, it didn't work out as nice for you as if it has never happened in the first place, but he could feel a new tension and energy, a precipice on which he was looking out at a new and encompassing depth of your bond, of your relationship, and he only had to dive in with you. he was almost even excited to start this new and beautiful era of your life together.
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impalaimagining · 1 year
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Somehow.... Dean and Rupaul
cc: @torn-and-frayed
Dean Winchester x Reader
530 words
Warnings: none
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“Dean! Season finale!” You bounded through the corridors of the bunker, a six-pack in one hand and a brown bag loaded down with greasy burgers and fries in the other. Throwing open the door to Dean’s bedroom, you stopped in your tracks and frowned. “Dean?” You turned around and crept down the hall, goosebumps prickling the back of your neck.
You set down the food and beer and reached behind you, fingers grasping the handle of the gun tucked into the back of your jeans. Tiptoeing, you slowly drew back the hammer of your pistol, cocking it as you stalked around the corner towards a shadow cast across the cold, cement floor.
“Don’t move, you son of a bitch!” You whipped around the corner and jammed the barrel of your gun into the left shoulder blade of the person on the other side.
“Jesus, kid.” Dean flinched, reaching around with his right hand and grabbing your wrist, lowering your weapon. “Take it easy, would ya?” 
“Dean!” You unloaded your gun and tucked it back into your waistband with a loud sigh. “Did you not hear me or something?”
“Huh? Oh, uh - no.” Dean cleared his throat. “I was…” You peeked around his arm to see a door you’d never noticed before, cracked slightly ajar.
“What is that?” You pointed accusingly.
“Nothing!” Dean scrambled, trying unsuccessfully to block you. You barged past him and flung the mystery door open wide.
“Dean Winchester!” You gasped. Before you, there was a giant flatscreen television glowing with bright colors, drag outfits, and RuPaul’s shiny, bald head. “You started watching without me!” Faking a sob, you ran back past him overdramatically.
“Hey, wait!” Dean called after you, catching you quickly and pulling you back against his chest in a hug that you almost convinced him was unwanted. “I wanted to surprise you.”
“By watching without me?” You faked another cry.
“No. Get back in there.” He turned you back towards his secret room, but you bolted and grabbed the booze and burgers you made a special trip to pick up. Dean frowned. “What’s that?”
Heat rose in your cheeks. “I wanted to surprise you too.” You pulled the beer out from where it was tucked into your elbow. A beer Dean never splurged on for himself, a local craft microbrew. He’d never even admited to liking it, except that one time when he had one or four too many of them at a street fair in town. “And these.” You extended your hand, brown bag somehow even greasier than when you got home. “Extra onions.”
“Come on.” He threw his arm over your shoulders and ushered you into what you’d come to lovingly refer to as the Dean Cave. You sat in an oversized recliner and shared beers, burgers, and laughs.
“We should go to a drag show.” You suggested, words only slightly slurring together. Dean raised his brows but shrugged. “Really? You’d go with me?” 
“Don’t fuck it up.” The voice came from the television, but it could’ve been Dean’s internal monologue.
Don’t fuck it up.
“Yeah, sweetheart.” Dean took a long pull from his bottle. “I’d do damn near anything with you.”
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Forever Tags: @atc74 @awesome-badass-cafeteria-sauce @beththedemonhunter @blacktithe7 @caswinchester2000 @chelseadanielle19 @countrygal17a @danathewitchywoman @deansgirl215 @deanwanddamons @elizzysnow13 @ellen-reincarnated1967 @emoryhemsworth @esoltis280 @essie1876 @feelmyroarrrr @foxyjwls007 @heartsaved @hillface89 @holyfuckloueh @hunterpuff @in-deans-arms @ladylachesis @lilredniki @linki-locks11 @mottergirl99 @mrswhozeewhatsis @notyourtypicalrose @plaid-lover-bay25 @riversong-sam @sandlee44 @sea040561 @shaelyn102 @smoothdogsgirl @snackles87 @soulmates8 @speakinvain @spn-dean-and-sam-winchester @spnbaby-67 @supernatural3002 @superromjin @tumblr-tidbits @vicmc624 #voltage-my2dlove @wayward-gypsy
Dean Tags: @adoptdontshoppets @akshi8278 @cherrycokegirls1 @clarewinchester @dean-winchesters-bacon @deanandsamsbitch @fandom-princess-forevermore @iamabeautifulperson18 @lessons-of-red @mereka18 @princessofthefandomrealm @shamelesslydean @torn-and-frayed @yoursmilemakesmeloveyou
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ctommy-chileno · 1 year
Text
Here's a list of some ongoing fanfictions I've been following if you want some literature
(Ongoing as in. Updated in the past month or this month)
Butterfly Reign: You know this one, it's the angst full and oddly yellow one. I always end up finding out it updated a day before it released how does that keep happening?. It's a good read, the characters get deeper the more you read it, and yet even with all their hidden lore and ok ish intentions I still want them to suffer because I'm a spiteful bitch. Unreliable narrator to you I believe him.
In the name of the fucking moon: Its a magical girls AU with the benchers and the family, more on the old school monster of the week type of magical girls but with continuity. If you imagine the scenes in your head while reading please add an 80's anime filter over it. Fun to read 👍 I got halfway through and I'm waiting for it to finish so I can binge it.
Guided evolution: Only read this if you have a lot of free time or the time management skills of a lawyer because this here is 300.000+ words and incredibly good. Every chapter I do nothing but worry for my spider son. Hasn't he been through enough I ask, while seeing I'm on chapter 52 out of 75. I know the answer, and it only serves to hurt me.
How to be the biggest trainer ever: Crimeboys go in a pokemon adventure. A very friendly fun read, like the pokemon anime but with your favourite white boys having fun 👍the world is set on gen 1 I think, so use that soundtrack
The stars and their children: Ive only read till chapter 5 and that's enough to know its good (also the fact that I follow the author here on tumblr so I get spoiled every once in a while hehe) This one is more sandduo focused and it has cool sci fi monarchy and it's also very near to end?? I didn't know that. Guess I'll get up to date then. Star tommy did nothing wrong I haven't seen him do much of anything but if he does in the other 19 chapters be aware he did nothing wrong
By the morrow: this one is weird and interesting in the most enticing way possible. What the fuck is going on. I must know all the reasons behind what is happening here. It can be quite macabre so be aware. I only found this one because the author posted the updates to tumblr. Oh yeah the synopsis, superhero au where the ctommy is a nobody who dies and fucks around the town in his ghost form but shit hits the fan incredibly quickly.
Who the ever loving fuck made me a prince: Its an Isekai yipee, our main boy (el ctommy) reads a book where a kid prince dies. L. Then he wakes up as that same kid!!! Oh no!!! Good news is he's reincarnated right in baby zone so he has plenty of time and skill to make sure won't die 👍, its fun, if you like isekais and don't mind some anime trope baby ism then you will live another day
Proof that life hates tommyinnit personally: This is a mystery!!! Spooky!! With touches of angst, perhaps more than some touches but hey the thrill!! The search!! I enjoy the use of the "it's not paranoia if they're really put to get you" tag. Its one of those fics that if it ever gets dropped I would go to the authors house to ask how was it supposed to end. I need. To know. Oh yeah summary: el ctommy is homeless and has many friends in a local mall who don't know that. This is only one (1) of his problems as he's recently gained a stalker, and everything points to being someone he knows ?? Question mark?? Fun.
TommyInnit's Declassified Vigilante Survival Guide: Ah a good old vigilante fic, just like mama used to make. it checks all the marks: benchtrio living together, villain sbi, when the family is founded, heroes yet bad?? and introducing a cool new power to the boy, what a joy! It is funny and it is cool
Our love it's like a burning sun: you've heard of racconinnit, birdinnit, ratinnit, cat shifter innit, possumi- hm I haven't heard that actually, anyways get ready for Red Panda innit, here's a red panda shifter who runs away from mean kingdom and goes to nice kingdom where he can find some family. And sometimes that's all you need to face the horrors
Thunder on my bones: ANOTHER superhero au listen man this one is good trust me. We have superhero boy being sidekick to mean superhero then gets moved to nice family of superheroes and the family is found :)) but also there's villains that want to fuck him up , uh oh! How will they found the family in this conditions! I also really like the design of the tommy superhero outfit, it has a really nice detail that I love imagining in my head ^^
There are more but these are long and easy to get into
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pastel-rights · 8 months
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Rate your friends
oh this anon finally decided to come around [insert tracy happy here]
uhhh it'll be underneath the cut because it's gonna be. long as hell BWAHAHA apologizing ahead of time if I get sappy 😶‍🌫️
sap
sap
sapppp
Rina [ My first real internet friend 🫡]
RINAAA I see you. I see your art. I perceive you.
And, even if we don't talk as much as we used to in the past, you'll always be the first of many great people I've met. And, I really love and appreciate your presence in my life. Dare I say it was life-altering!!
Ocean, Shamia, Arella, and all your other ocs, I'm cradling them in the palms on my hands so so lovingly. I have so many things I need to tell you to be honest !! But goddamnit I have work every night so I'm always busy doing something wahhhh
Anyways.
New Shamia reference when? I need to draw her and her blonde bitchass dog [ jack ] again they're so funny and I miss them 😭
Blue [ My lifelong irl to internet friend ]
From an IRL friend to now an online friend, we just can't get rid of each other. You're so cool...
You don't use tumblr so, I won't talk much further... but I do appreciate you. And all your silly Itto shrine moments.
Tae [ My Beloved Wife 🫶🏼]
She's the Cro to my Lee.
The Shuichi to my Kaede.
The President Barbie to my Stereotypical Barbie.
The Kafka to my Bladie [ unfortunately /lh ]
Theeeee Raiden Ei to my Yae Mikooooo.
My wife is many things to me!! I really really love your art and your writing, and you're always so kind and funny and I just wanna grrrrr I just want to hold all your ocs and all your muses so close I love them all 😭😭😭
although
YOU.
YOU
FUCKING
ASSHOLE /lh
THAT ORPHY EDIT. THOSE KAFKA BLADIE EDITS. THAT PEACE AND FRIENDSHIP TRIO EDIT. TRYING TO GASLIGHT ME INTO THINKING EVERYONE ELSE ISNT REAL. THE MURDER. THE KIDNAPPING. THE DART. THE FUCKING DART. OUGHHHHHHHHH
I HOPE YOU FALL THROUGH THE SKY, JOHN. KER-FUCKING-SPLAT, BITCH. I think you've driven me insane. A little bit.
But.
We're so good we are so good. Don't even WORRY about it.
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Sam [ My Infamous Brother-in-Tumblr Law ]
Sam you're so. /pos
I think the Immortalpheus AU has permanently altered my perception on life.
Your writing is. well. it's painful /pos
You're so cryptic and really funny yet you and your sister make me say some weird shit during work. Like the uno cards and the Dazai shenanigans and Immortalpheus moments and whenever you drop some life shattering fics and shit you drop on others.
Crazy.
You're a very nice and fun person, all jokes aside!! You're very cool and very amazing and a delight to game with and just fun to be around??? your AU lore and your bots and everything is just so.
mwah
good friend good friend!!
french /j
Piano Immortalpheus forever immortalized isn’t that funny
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Navi [ My detective in arms ]
NAVI.
OUGH.
THOSE VERITY JOURNAL ENTIRIES.
IM SO.
OUGHHHHHHH
Your art and your way of expressing your characters and your son in your writing are just soooo good I rotate them in my head so often.
Whenever I see you posting about your crimes to Tumblr, I simply giggle. Get em, Navi!!
We don't talk very often but like. I'd love to talk more. plot. commit shenanigans. heart hands.
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Fifi [ fucking fifi /lh ]
I want to clasp my hands around your neck and rattle you violently /lh /pos
How are we friends /lh
We've been friends so long, it's kind of insane??? I remember first talking to you during Amy's opening event and everything just sort of spiraled from there... and every day with you is. an experience!! /pos
Still waiting for the Tower Bifty interaction fr fr [ they try to murder each other within the first five replies /j ]
Carrie [ my favorite mike enjoyer ]
CARRRIEEEEE
Number One Mike enthusiast the real Mike enjoyer.
Im always so giddy whenever you occasionally message me, even if it's just to check on me or show me how you torment Sam /lh and your writing and way of interpreting differing IDV characters and skins is so good??? I love reading them they make me so giggly.
Overall 10/10 friend would ramble to given the chance
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Pins [ my boss /ih ]
MAFIA FISHHHHHHHHHH
stunning
beautiful
talented
pink enthusiast
My actual best friend, dare i say the bestest friend in the world???? every moment I spend with you is a blissful and amazing moment, and you've been through so much with me and the fact you stayed throughout it all????
I'm just... really glad you chose to stick with me this long. I can be a very abrasive and impulsive person, and yet you care for me, even with all my flaws and I think that just... says a lot about you.
You're the Jade to my Chiaki.
The Rook to my Epel.
The Deuce to my Ace!
Also your art just solos everything I glow whenever I see it
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Skye [ my twst buddy !! ]
Grabs you
Holds you
Rattles you
Is friend.
Is friend shaped.
Approved /lh
Four [ floyd kinnie moment ]
Stop tormenting me with the take a break floyds you SCARE me
Never will be over the fucking
Ghostbusters Floyd edit
I flex my Beans Floyd in memory of you
You’re not dead I think you’re just somewhere in the distance squeezing someone like your life depends on it
10/10 friend when we ignore the four imposed breaks /j
Beth [ my favorite aesop and naib enjoyer ]
You.
Holds you gently.
The Aesop player
The Panda Naib haver.
The beloved
The silly.
✨ Beth ✨
Your art? Immaculate. I such a adoration for your art, and whenever I’m able to catch your drawing streams??? I’m just in awe!! Your colors and outfit inspirations are just so cute so nice so well done???
You’re so. You’re so cool uwahhh
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MarioGuy [ where do you keep coming from I know damn well it isn't the door /lh ]
I feel like you kind of just break into my house sometimes and make yourself known before randomly disappearing through a non existent back door /pos
You’re a delight to be around!! Every match with you is a bit. It’s uhm. Something!! /lh
Please stop breaking into my home
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Rice [ i occasionally remember that Mi Bianca thing and cry a little ]
Every time I see you pop up in my notifications I just smile and giggle.
We don’t talk often but you’re just so cool and awesome and your muses are so funky fresh and your art is so good and ????
Yeah.
Klai [ you. ]
You.
Chaos gremlin.
You never learn.
But you’re funny so I guess it’s okay.
Your art is so. It’s like a shiny gem 💎 and I WANT it. Holding it hostage.
My precious friend’s doodles.
Never trusting you to prime a cipher though. No hard feelings /lh
10/10 friend!! 0/10 decoder though /j
Orange [ ORANGEEEE my favorite chaos gremlin ]
ORANGEEEEE 🍊
So funny
So talented
So cool
So so cool
Your art is so good, you’re so funny and talented and a wonder to talk to. Your ideas are so creative so unique and yet so unequivocally you and I just…
I love it!!
Orange stop being so cool /j
Clown [ the greatest step-parent on the scene!! ]
This is utter insanity Clown you can’t be EVERY MUSE’S step parents there has to be a LIMIT!!!
A LINE in the SAND!!!!
Clown PLEASEEE
But also your art.
I’ve talked so much about everyone’s art
Yours reminds me of the feeling of waking up on a snow day and realizing school is canceled.
It’s always such a delight to see!!
And while every time you open your mouth, I get a little more worried about you, you’re so so cool /lh
Lupi [ you. x2 ]
imagine arson? imagine it no more im approaching your house at rapidly increasing speeds with my hello kitty lighter /j
Sleepy [ 🫡 ]
Sleepy!! 🫂 so cool,,, you’re so cool,,, /pos
Emma [ Sorry. Only one monster lover can exist in this server peacefully. GET EM. - emma ]
The caption says it all.
Also Tatya stop accidentally seducing all the muses or nearly getting stabbed or exploded or hypnotized you are worrying the GIRLIES! /lh
Al [ you have the vibes of the drunk wine family member in a /pos way ]
I don’t talk to you often but whenever you come around, it makes me so giggly. You’re very funny and your art slaps!!
Joe [ joe the silliest ]
JOE
Joe
Joe!
Your art? Funky fresh.
The lore? So interesting I love the little snippets I see floating around.
You’re so creative
Your Embrace is so funny they scream sacrificial lamb uncle who’s kind of fun at parties /lh
They’ve also got a really nice and warm personality, chaotic yet chill and relatable.
Kind of reminds me of Sam but without the entities 🫶🏼
Nakki [ you. x3 ]
Grabs you like a squeaky toy
That’s it that’s everything tbh
Kory, Boris, Brian [ and the rest of the McMun's Hut /lh ]
And this goes out to all my friends and acquaintances in the McMun’s hut! What is wrong with all of you /pos/lh (except you Boris, you’re an Angel)
Everyone there is super chill and super nice, and they’re a lot of fun to be around. So many differing personalities yet it’s always a vibe somehow.
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