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melloween-candie · 8 months

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An Endless Mission [J/Birch]

Judd Birch x Leah's BFF reader

Summary

Leah is your best friend and she knows your dirty little secret... she knows that- YOU HAVE A BIG FAT CRUSH ON HER OLDER BROTHER JUDD!

You've had this crush on him for years and for years she has made it her mission to get you two together!

A/n - Writing this just cause he was my favorite Character in the show lol. I don't know... He just gave off that kind of vibe where he's sweet but psycho. Anyways I feel like he deserves more love. 😘

Warning! *SPOILER SEASON 1 Cussing, alcohol, mentions of boobs, boob touching, slight drowning, degrading, depression, anxiety, slight physical abuse

Word Count: 6,067

⚠️NOT MY ART⚠️

Big Mouth Masterlist

Fandom Masterlist

/"Talking"//Thinking//Muttering-Whispering/

***Narrator's Pov***

"Leah! You said this was a pool party!?" You whined, trying to cover up your bikini body with your hands, but miserably failed. All your clothes were inside your bag, too, so you couldn't just grab them and change right then and there.

Though it would be a lie to say that you didn't want to try...

When you saw that familiar black hair with blue highlights, walk into the living room- You. Wanted. To. Die.

Right then and there... Your crush... Standing just a few feet away from you- just looking at you as if you were a maniac.

"Why are you in a bikini?" He asked. His voice was as deep as ever.

"Um... Uh..." You were dying out there. Your heart was beating, and your face was flushed red. You looked like you took a dip in a pool with all the sweat you were accumulating- meanwhile, your 'best friend' just stood there giggling.

You were so embarrassed...

"So, Judd- what do you think of Y/n's bikini she's going to wear tomorrow for the pool party?" She said with a teasing voice.

He stood there for a moment and then grunted. Giving you a slight nod, then left. His face never changed. He didn't even give you a little smirk...

"Wha- what's that supposed to mean?!" I said to Leah once he was fully gone.

She snorted. "You're hot. That's what it means." She giggles even more.

"Leah!!!" Your face turned an even brighter shade of red.

Back then, when you were a kid, most people never saw you. They never acknowledged you. You were practically invisible... Until you hit puberty. Nobody expected anything from you- in fact, you were a late bloomer. You were the last person in your class to get your period, and your boobs didn't start growing until the beginning of high school...

But look at you now. You were going into junior year with a hot body. Your hips grew in, and so did your boobs. You had what most girls wanted- an hourglass body. Silky smooth skin and a bubbly butt to top it off.

Though, because of how you were raised, you were always self-conscious. You made sure nothing showed, as hard as it was... You genuinely didn't like the attention. You were so used to the shadows, and quite frankly, you enjoyed it too.

Small Time Skip!~

"I can't believe you did this to me!!" You covered your face with your hands, feeling completely embarrassed.

"Oh, come on, Y/n! It wasn't that bad! You have the hottest body In. Our. Grade!! Use it~!" She said with a huge smile on her face. "I mean, I know it can feel like Judd doesn't have a di*k to get a boner sometimes, BUT if anyone CAN give him a boner, it's YOUUU!" She shook your shoulder lightly.

"God, seriously, Leah..." You uncovered your face to reveal a deep frown. "I love that you care, but I don't think I can survive another embarrassing moment like that..."

"Oh, don't be ridiculous-" Leah said, cutting you off. "You've survived all the other times!" She said as she started to braid your hair.

"For example, remember the first time we meant?!" Her smile grew even bigger.

"Oh god..." You muttered.

"We were in 6 grade meanwhile my brother was in 8th grade..."

"Please- end me." You muttered as Leah continues.

"It was the first time you came to my house. I was grabbing drinks, and I simply told you to go upstairs to the right... Where my room should be..."

"Please! STOP!" You covered your face one again out of pure embarrassment.

Leah giggled. "You ended up walking into my brother's room thinking it was mine-"

"You said to the right!" You interjected, trying to defend yourself.

"Well, I'm sorry, but I didn't know my rights and lefts at the time, and quite frankly, I still don't." She said, shrugging her shoulders as she continued. "But do you remember the face my brother made when he saw you there! Sitting on his bed...!" She started cackling.

"Oh, how can I forget." You said, rolling your eyes.

"H-his face- wa-was sooo red!!!" She laughed even more.

"Yeah, red with anger!"

Leah whipped a tear away- "No, silly. Red with embarrassment."

"Oh, please. He wasn't embarrassed- he yelled at me, Leah! That's not how normal people react when they're embarrassed."

"Oh, please. You should know by now- my brother isn't normal. Plus, he likes you!! How many times do I have to say it to convince you?!"

"Leah, stop! He has never once shown any positive sign-!"

Leah grabbed your shoulders, interrupting you completely. "How many times do I have to tell you?! My. Brother. Isn't. Normal!!!" She said shacking you.

"And besides, there ARE signs!" She said as she grabbed something from under her bed.

"Oh god... Not that again..." You said crunching up your face.

"Oh yes. It's this again!" Leah giggled, shoving the book in your face.

The title said-

Leah's Proof Book!!!

"I'm still so happy how I thought of this!"

This was a book that Leah made when she was little. It only took a few days of your friendship for her to realize you had a crush on her brother, Judd. This book contained-

The conversation, word for word, when you confessed to her the first time about having a crush on her brother.

Along with how you fell for him... When you first spoke to him- ON YOUR OWN! And along with all the times when Leah tried hooking you up with him.

To you- that book contained all the embarrassing fails you had with Judd; meanwhile, Leah saw the book as progress, Progress, PROGRESS~!

She REALLY wanted you and Judd to work out. She was literally your biggest ship fan ever. She just thought that it would be really cool to have you literally a part of her family. You are her best friend, after all, and even though her brother was scary and can come off as mean- she knows he would treat you right.

"What are you writing down now..." You said with a dreading undertone...

"Uhh, duh? That beautiful moment earlier when your body made Judd completely speechless~" She was completely overtaken by the giggles by this point... And all you did was lay flat on her bed sighing in defeat.

Time skip!~

"GIRLS DINNER TIME!"

"COMING!" Leah yelled.

"So, like I said earlier, Judd will be at the pool party." She said as she walked down the stairs with you.

"Right... Leah, I don't know- I don't think pretending to drown is a safe idea. Plus, you said it yourself: your brother is a bit- uhh, you know. I-I don't really want to die tomorrow." You said, rubbing your neck.

"Talking about Judd again, I, see?" Leah's dad Elliot said.

Oh, did I forget to mention- LEAH'S ENTIRE FAMILY KNOWS ABOUT YOUR CRUSH... and sadly, you weren't entirely sure if Judd knows. I mean, he is a very intuitive person. He practically knows everything, so you wouldn't be surprised if he knew about your long-time crush on him, and he simply chose to not say anything about it.

"Oh, stop it, Dad," Leah said. "No offense, but this is girl talk!" Leah grabbed your shoulders, pushing you away from her father.

"Yeah, Elliot. It's girl talk." Said Diana- Leah's mom. "Now, did you add any new entries to that book of your Leah? It's been a hot minute since..."

"Mom! How many times do I have to tell you! STOP SNEAKING IN MY ROOM-! And also- don't read my book! That's weird!" Leah yelled.

"What book?" Everything instantly froze when they heard that voice.

You stood there; your face turned completely red as you prayed it wasn't who you knew it was.

"You mean that dumb proof-book?" He said as he leaned on a counter, swinging a knife as he spoke.

"Y-you were in my room!" Leah stuttered. Her face was now red too- but not from embarrassment, no. But from anger.

"Relax butt-face. I didn't read your stupid book." He said as he shoved pass her.

As you just sighed in releaf.

Small Time Skip!~

***Leah's Pov***

Finally, it was dinner time! As I sat down, I gave Nick a little head nod, and he returned the gesture. Little did Y/n know this wasn't going to be an ordinary dinner...

A few minutes have passed, and not much was said...

"Uhh- Y/n, can you pass me the salt?"

"Uh, sure." She leaned in towards Judd's direction... That poor girl. I couldn't help but giggle a little. She may be sixteen, but she sure doesn't understand what I got her to do with that simple pled.

To put it into simple terms... I just got her to show her cleavage to my brother. I made sure to pay extra attention to his reaction, too. Most people would have missed it, especially since he was taking a sip of his drink, but I swear he smirked while looking at it.

"Um here." She said plainly, then went back to eating.

Step one of the dinner execution is complete. On to step too- touchy touch!

Knowing my brother- he can't resist spices, especially now! I made sure to get my mom to make his favorite. Every time she makes it, he'd always put hot sauce and a whole load of spices into it. I personally don't understand why. The meal is already spicey enough as it is...

I winked towards my dad- oh, did you think it was just me and Nick executing this? Oh, my dear, no... MY ENTIRE FAMILY is in this- my mom made the food, and now the rest is up to us three!

Once my dad saw Judd grab the spice shaker, he cleared his throat, waiting for the perfect time... And then BANG!

"Y/n deary, can you pass the spice shaker, please?" He smiled.

"Uhh, sure." She looked at Judd, who was still holding it. He meant her eyes, and she blushed. Then he gave our dad a glare as he passed the shaker to Y/n.

It was small, but It was still successful. Her index and middle finger touched his...

"Thank you, deary-"

"Okay, what's going on?" He said out of the blue.

"Oh my. But what do you mean, Juddy buddy?" Elliot smiled.

"You hate spices." He said plainly.

Crap...

"Oh... well... Hate is a strong word..." He said, trying to buy time to escalate the backup procedure.

I took a sip of my drink as I looked off to the corner. I placed my arm on the table and carefully angled my elbow towards Y/n's drink. Then I looked towards Nick; he, too, was drinking his cup.

And at the same time, we strike!

"Ughh! Hey!?" Y/n got up. Her drink spilled all over her white top... As Nick pretended to sneeze all over Judd. He got up, clearly pissed. He slammed Nick's head onto the table as a result, which gave my little brother a bloody nose..., and of course, my mother had to interject. Meanwhile, our father ran towards the bathroom with the excuse of-

"Ohh... Your right, Judd spices are NOT my friend." As he ran, he held his stomach to make it look more believable...

And with that, Nick pulled it off- he ran towards his 'so-called room.' When in reality, he ran towards Judd's room and locked it. Hopefully, he got out in time.

Meanwhile, Y/n walked towards our second and only bathroom that wasn't being used... Do you see the picture now?

I smirked evilly as they both walked away from the dining room.

Once they were gone, I saw something fall outside... OH MY GOD, it was Nick!

"I'm okay!" He said, then he fell back down. "Still- Oh-Kay... Huh..."

It seems that he did manage to escape in time. Good for him. I thought as I drank the rest of my drink.

And then... I heard it! A scream erupted from the upstairs bathroom. It sounded just like Y/n.

I quickly rushed along with my mother.

And there it was... Y/n had her shirt dangled in her arms... Her bra was pushed up a bit, so her boob fat poked out a little... She was on the ground- probably due to the shock of the door being opened on her. Meanwhile, my brother held the doorknob... He said nothing. His mouth was slightly gaped open...

Then, when he saw me and Mom, he made a tch sound, closed the door, and left with his usual grumpy self. Though I could have sworn I saw a blush on his face.

It was working... My plan was working... I was finally cracking him- I hid a smile as I tried to help my friend.

Time Skip!~

***Maurice's Pov***

"Holy shit, I can't believe that happened!" I was currently sitting on Judd's bed, feeling all tingly from the moment before. "You practically saw her nipples- No. WE practically saw her nipples!!"

"Shut it!" Judd says through gritted teeth as he continues to lift his weight bar once again.

"Ugghhh, but Judd! You have a fine hottie under your own house!!! She's going to be here for a whole night! Don't you at least want to fantasize about her?" I asked as I wiggled a sexy magazine in front of him.

All he replied with was a 'tch' as he continued lifting weights.

I sighed as I continued on with the next person on my list...

"Man, you're no fun..." I say as I got ready to leave. "Welp, wiggle your di*k if you need me." Then I left.

And all he said was "tch."

"In my opinion... I found that quite offensive. I mean, he didn't even say goodbye!" I said with the 'what's-wrong-with-this-kid' face. "It's like he's immune to horniness... wait, no- that's stupid, ha. I should write that down-"

Time Skip!~

***Leah's Pov***

"Okay, so I know dinner didn't go exactly as planned, but at least it ended well in the end," I said, trying to keep quiet.

It was currently midnight. Judd and Y/n were supposedly sleeping. Meanwhile, me and the rest of my family were holding a secret mission.

"So, mom. Do you still have that spare key to Judd's room?"

"Oh, sweety." She pulls out the keys. "I never leave home without it." She smiles.

"Great!" I whispered. "Now, Dad- are you ready?"

"Absolutely, sweety."

"Great! Let's get this show started!" I cheered lightly.

Small time skip!

I know you may think this is a little far fetch, but when I say they're meant to be, they are!!!

Okay! They don't really know it, but they actually have lots of things in common. Like Y/n loves horror movies, so does he. She absolutely loves raccoons... I don't know why, but that's her... Anyways, you get the idea.

Right now, me and my dad are currently carrying Y/n's sleeping body while my mom slowly opens Judd's door...

It was kind of scary, to be honest. No one ever really goes in here, so we didn't really know what to expect. All we did was pray he was asleep, and thankfully he was.

I know this might be wrong since it can go wrong sooo quickly, but like... There's a chance where he might not stab y/n the moment he wakes up... Right? Haha... Ha...

Anyways, we placed her under his sheets quietly. Thankfully, she's a deep sleeper... Now, all there was to do was head to bed and wait till morning!

Time Skip!

***Y/n's Pov***

I was rudely awakened by a hand covering my mouth. At first, I tried screaming but then froze when I realized I wasn't in Leah's room anymore... Dear God, no...

That's right... I was in Judd's bed... Wearing nothing but panties and a tank top... I looked up at him, and he had his fingers to his lips.

"H-how did I get here..." I stared the door down for dear life. I was too scared to face him.

"Leah and the others. They placed you here when you were sleeping. I saw it all happened."

"Uh...Oh." I looked down, completely embarrassed.

Judd just stood there looking at me... It was an awkward silence. I wasn't sure what to do. I kind of just sat there, completely frozen... Until he spoke.

"You can sleep there for the night."

I looked at him in shock. His facial structure stayed the same as always.

"I'm not sure what they're trying to do, but clearly, they really want you around me..."

There again... A moment of silence. I looked towards the ground. I couldn't help but feel ashamed for what I was wearing...

"I won't stop them." He muttered as he lifted up his window. I couldn't really hear that first part but then he said- "You can sleep here for the night. It's not like I ever use my bed anyways." Then he left through the window.

I quickly got up in fear that he might have hurt himself, but he was gone. He wasn't on the ground... He was nowhere to be found. I sighed, closing his window. Then I returned to his bed and cuddled up close to his blankets.

I know it was a little wrong, but I couldn't help but enjoy this... The blankets smelled exactly like him! And they were really warm too! His bed was so comfy that I fell asleep again quite quickly.

Time skip!~ MORNING!

***Leah's Pov***

When I saw Y/n and Judd walk downstairs towards the kitchen- where everyone was... I couldn't help but make the comment- "So, how did y'all sleep last night?" I looked directly at them both, trying to hide my growing smirk and giggles.

Before Y/n could say anything- Judd spat- "Wouldn't you like to know?" He smirked... He SMIRKED!

Does that actually mean... NO WAY...! Did my baby bird finally popped her cherry?!

I mentally screamed with joy. As Y/n groggily walked over. Her hair was a mess... She clearly had an 'intense' night. I laughed in my head.

I nudged her with my elbow... Teasing her, she just rolled her eyes as she took another sip of her coffee.

Time Skip!~

"Wait, what? You didn't actually lose your V-card?" I was somewhat disappointed as I slipped on my bikini bottoms. We had about thirty minutes left till the party started.

"You make it sound like a bad thing?"

"Well... It's just- you were in his room practically naked..."

She blushes. Hitting me playfully as I giggled. "Leah!" She whined.

I giggled harder- "Don't worry, Y/n. I promised he'll take your virginity at some point today!"

"LEAH!"

I laughed harder.

Small Time Skip!~

Not even thirty minutes into the party, the house was already packed... which would have been fine if my stupid brother, Nick, hadn't invited all his stupid friends. I rolled my eyes for what felt like the fifth time that night...

What's worse is that Judd still hasn't shown... God, this sucks. If he doesn't show up, then my ultimate bestie hook-up plan won't work. I sighed, taking a long sip of the wine Judd got for the party.

Small Time Skip!~

10 more minutes passed by, and I was still leaning against the wall... just waiting for him. Meanwhile, Y/n was just sitting by the edge of the pool... GOD, this would be THE PERFECT time for Me to EXECUTE my PLAN!! I whined.

And then- FINALLY! He shows up... He wasn't even in a swimsuit- which was slightly disappointing. I was kind of hoping to see my girly have that cute, embarrassing, stutter moment most movies make when they make situations similar to this.

But that's not the point... I'm just glad he showed up; otherwise, I would have had to get my other brother, Nick, to go and get one of his raccoons... There's a fifty percent chance they don't know how to swim, and knowing Judd, he'd kill anyone if it meant they'd live.

I walked towards Judd, who was currently drinking the last of his Jack... "Hey, so-" He smashed the glass bottle on the fool, making me jump. "Seriously?"

"Where's my fifty bucks?" He said with one hand whipping his lips while the other was extended towards me.

I rolled my eyes. "You'll get your fifty soon, but first-" I shoved him perfectly behind Y/n. Who didn't even know he was here- let alone coming...

He stumbled a little bit. "What the hell- Oof?!"

"Eek!"

'SPLASH!'

I know- he's going to kill me... BUT IT WAS SO WORTH IT! When they both came to the surface- he was holding her as she was coughing. Her wet bangs covered her eyes, so she didn't even know... AHHHAHAHAH! I couldn't help but fangirl over the scene.

***Y/n's Pov***

I didn't even know what happened... One moment, I was sitting on the edge of the pool. My legs were dangling in the water, and I was just chilling- then the next thing I knew, something- or in this case, someone pushed me...

"Tch."

That was all I heard when I came to the surface. Something was holding me up... which was great cause I didn't really know how to swim. However, the sound of that voice sounded a little too familiar... which honestly terrified me.

I took a moment before brushing away my bangs... Then there he was- Judd Birch... his shirt was sticking to his skin, outlining the curves of his muscles... Oh god-

I looked towards Leah, clearly annoyed and very embarrassed. Meanwhile, Judd carried me to shore.

He seemed a little more adjugated than usual... He placed me down and walked directly towards Leah, who was slowly backing up. Then she started running, shrieking while doing so as he chased her. "LEAHHH! YOU FUCK FACE, GET BACK HERE!" He yelled, causing a crowd to start forming.

Then suddenly Leah ran towards me- before I could even react, she grabbed my shoulders and used me as a shield- "Hey!"

"Sorry, girly- But unlike me, he won't kill you!" She had her eyes closed tightly as if I would actually work as a descent shield... Her head was turned away, too-

I rolled my eyes, but then two seconds later, I felt something. I froze... Judd Birch... was touching my-my-my bo-bo-boobs! My face turned completely red as I just stared at him. His eyes were slightly bigger, and his face was a little flushed, but then he quickly composed himself- pulling his hands away.

People obviously took advantage of that entire scene... they took videos and pictures. God, I'm going to hate myself once I see how many views it'll get...

Leah finally loosened her grip on me. She opened her eyes and looked at her brother. "Umm... did I miss something?"

He just 'tched' and left. He was clearly blushing... I guess he, too, was capable of feeling embarrassment.

***Marice's Pov***

"WHAT WAS THAT! You had the opportunity to squeeze them, but you just let them go!"

I yelled as we both walked away from that fiasco. "Y/n was in your grasp, man! WASN'T THAT WHAT YOU DREAMED OF- what you wanted!" I whined.

I couldn't help but feel upset. It's like he was ignoring me... he barely jerks off- and now, when he likes someone, he does nothing! LETERALLY NOTHING!

***Judd's Pov***

"Shut the h*ll up, Mori. That was an accident." I said to that 'thing' that constantly follows me.

"Yeah! And besides- didn't you see her face! She was mortified!" Tito said. "Her face alone PROVED that she didn't like you!"

Great- that stupid mosquito's here now. I slammed my bedroom door shut.

"Oww- Don't feel bad, Judd. I'm sure she understands. It was an accident, after all. And don't believe a word that filthy mosquito says-" The stupid love bug grabbed my shoulder. "I'm sure she loves you too."

I felt the heat rise up to my cheeks. My grip on the edge of my bed tightened as I stared at nothing... I hate this.

My heart was pounding, and my chest tightened... Maybe that stupid mosquito was right-

***Y/n's Pov***

Leah finally released my shoulders. I just sat there on my knees.

"Soo~ How did it feel!" She smiled.

"Wha-" I scrunched my eyebrows, turning to face her. I was clearly lost...

"His hand, Y/n! His hand touched your boob!" She smiled, shacking me when she said that last sentence.

"Wait- did you plan this!" I said, clearly upset. "Leah! How many times do I have to tell you!" My eyes started watering as I got up.

"I didn't want your hel- uh... I-huh..." I rubbed my eyes, trying to wipe away the tears. I couldn't even look at her. "I-ha... I just-" I kept hiccupping, which irritated me.

"Y/n..."

I took a deep breath. "I just wished you left it alone! I wished you stopped putting me- in these embarrassing moments!" I cried out. "I'm not like you, Leah! I don't see everything like it's a movie!" I said, and then I ran off.

"Y/n wait-!" She yelled, trying to get up, but she lost me in the crowd.

God, I seriously hope that group of kids won't post that video of me crying... I already embarrassed myself enough today.

I was currently curled up on the bathroom floor. My tears stopped, but I didn't feel like moving. I just sat there... I didn't even bother whipping away the tear stains on my cheeks. I just quivered there pathetically.

"Oh, Y/n- it's okay." Connie said as she rubbed my back, clearly trying to comfort me.

"Okay- OKAY! That was a DISASTER! The ENTIRE GRADE saw Y/n CRY!" Tito yelled as they buzzed all around my head. Connie tried swatting it away but failed. "What's worse was that people were videoing her! No- wait! What if Judd sees that video! He's going to think we're a CRYBABY!!!" Tito multiplied even more.

"Oh, who CARES!" Yelled the hate worm. "Right now, we should be focusing on the one person who caused this he*l for us!"

"Oh, please!" Connie rolled her eyes. "Leah was only trying to help!"

Meanwhile, I just sat there. I held onto my knees as I hid my face.

"Shush now! All of you.~" Said the big fat cat... She wrapped around my body and purred. "Oh, Y/n. I told you to give up early on- it's a shame you didn't listen..." She continued to purr...

I didn't bother moving at all. I didn't say anything or do anything as they all rambled on.

"Oh dear..." Connie muttered.

***Leah's Pov***

Oh god- oh god! This is my fault! I got up as Y/n was completely out of my sight now... "WHAT THE HE*L ARE YOU ALL STILL DOING HERE!" I screamed out my frustration. After that, people started scrambling.

I quickly ran in the direction Y/n went. I tried looking for her everywhere, but I couldn't find her... and then I heard some muffling. It was coming from the end of the hallway- through that bathroom door.

I walked up to it slowly. "Y/n? Are you in there?" I knocked gently.

-No response-

"Okay- you don't have to respond. But if that's you in there- I. Am. So. Sorry." I said in a breathy tone. "I didn't mean for this to happen- I just..." I took a breath.

"Look. You were right. I should have just dropped it. I don't know what came over me... I'm. So. Sorry."

I closed my eyes and rested my forehead on the door. "I'm sorry for being such a sh*ty friend... I just really wanted for you and my brother to end up together- and now that I'm saying it out loud, it sounds wrong."

I turned around and leaned my back against the door- slowly slipping down to the floor. "You don't have to forgive me right away... But I really. Really! Hope we can stay friends." My eyes started watering at that point. "I promise... I'll- I'll back off." I started struggling with my words as the tears started falling down my cheek.

Then suddenly, the door behind me opened, causing me to fall. I looked up to see Y/n. My heart aches to see her in that state. I got up on my fours and crawled my way towards her, cuddling her as she went back to her sitting position.

We sat like that for a while until someone interrupted us.

***Judd's Pov***

"Yo dipshits. Got out of the bathroom, I gotta take a piss-" I stopped talking the moment I realized it was my little sister and her best friend. They both looked like they were crying.

What a shi*ty day.

"The he*l's wrong?" I said with a softer tone- hey, don't look at me like that! I'm not a monster...

I kneeled down towards them. I pushed my sister's bangs out of her eyes. I looked towards her in hopes she would get the cue and start explaining. She just shook her head lightly, then closed her eyes again, tightening her grip on Y/n.

"Tch." I got up and left.

"What the he*l are you doing! Y/n clearly needs you right now!"

Great... That stupid love bug appeared... What better timing. I thought sarcastically. I tightened my fists as I 'walked' downstairs.

"Dame Judd, what's wrong with yo-" Before that mistake named 'Nick' could finish his sentence, I pushed his ugly face out of my way.

"Get out of my way, disabled fu*k."

He ended up stubbing down the stairs. I just laughed. I heard his whining through the first-floor bathroom walls- it made me feel a little better.

Then my stupid parents showed up.

"What- happened here?" My mom said.

"Ughhh." Nick couldn't even walk straight... He must have drank too much of that pink baby sh*t. Tch- reminds me of my first time when I got drunk... Oh- good times- good times.

I then walked upstairs towards my room. I figured thoughts two would be done sulking by now... But nope, they were still there. It... Kinda sucked.

I sighed. I walked towards them.

"Hey- get up," I demanded.

-no response-

I rolled my eyes, grabbing them both. My heart ached when I saw Y/n's face... "Look, you both can't stay in here forever..." A moment of silence passed as they both just stared at the ground.

"Tch. Come on."

Leah looked up at me. "Where are we going?"

"Someplace, where you shi*s would stop feeling so- shi*ty..."

***Leah's Pov***

I smiled a little... It was nice to know that my brother cared... But then I looked at Y/n... She didn't even react. I don't even think she heard what he said.

He just dragged us both to his car, but when we got to the front door, I stopped him.

He looked back at me as he still held Y/n's wrist.

I looked down. "I'm fine... If anything- you should take Y/n."

"Yeah, well-" He paused for a moment. "Isn't that kind of your job- yeah, now. As her best friend and sh*t?"

"Trust me... She'll feel better with you..." I rubbed my arm.

"Whatever." The he left with her.

***Mori's Pov***

"Alright, man! Maybe we can turn this day around by having a wicked night with Y/n, yeah!?" I said, trying to cheer my buddy up. "You could even pretend it's a date! Like you always wanted-"

"Tch."

I stopped. If you were his hormone monster for as long as I was... You'd understand what that meant.

Time skip!~

***Y/n's Pov***

I looked up to see that he stopped in front of an abandoned building... Not creepy at all...

"Get out of the car," Judd said.

I did as he said and got out. My head still hanging low.

"Ohh god- he's gonna leave you here..." Said Tito. "He's- he's- HE'S GONNA LEAVE YOU HEAR TO DIE!"

My eyes started watering at the thought.

"Hey." Judd pulled my chin up so I'd face him. "Quite crying." He said in a softer tone.

Then he grabbed me and started walking inside.

We went a little deeper into the building, climbing a few stairs and going under this hole... Then there it was.

It was an okay-sized room... There were pillows and blankets everywhere. There was a bowl of raccoon food on the side and a lot of pictures... They looked like they were hand-drawn. I smiled at the one with- what I think was a raccoon? Surprisingly enough, this room was quite colorful due to the hanging blankets- acting like a roof so the actual roof wouldn't drop nasty dirt at us. And the fairy light... I didn't think he was the type of guy to use fairy lights to light up a room... Candles, at least.

"Wha-" I whipped my eyes. "What is this place?" I asked.

Judd sat down on what I assumed was a mattress. He was touching the wall... It looked like it had a lot of stab marks on it. "It's where I go when I feel like sh*t." He said, then he got up to grab a bottle of Jack out of the mini-fridge. "Don't say anything to Leah or your friends. I don't need any of them knowing about this place." He said with a slightly more threatening voice.

I simply nodded as he sat back down on the mattress and he pushed his knees closer to his chest. He cocked his head to the side, indicating me to sit next to him- I did.

"Want some?" He offered in a calming tone. I just nodded. No thanks. I thought.

"Suit yourself." He said, swinging his drink around lightly then proceeding to take a sip. We sat there in silence like that for a few good minutes.

It wasn't even uncomfortable. Until he broke the silence.

"So." He said, swinging his drink around lightly once again. "Do you- like... Like me or something?"

My heart started pounding once again. I looked at him- he wasn't looking at me. He simply just took another sip...... More like- he drank it all in one gulp...

He whipped his mouth. "Well?" He asked, looking down at his now empty bottle of Jack.

"I- uh..." I stuttered. "I- um..." My face felt like it was on fire. I didn't know what to do. I was too scared to say anything.

He sighed. Then he turned around to stare at the beaten wall... "I like you... You know."

My eyes widened at what he just said... Could I be hearing things or something!?!? I mean... I must be right!?!?

My heart was pounding way faster now. Then he turned around a little too quick. I scoot back a little.

He looked at me- "Say something, dipsh*t!"

Oh right... Well, here goes- well, everything.

"I-" I took a moment and to inhale some air. "I like you too!" I said as I shut my eyes as tightly as I could...

-no response-

For a moment, I started to think that he might have left, but then, suddenly, I felt something warm touching my cheek... His hands. It felt like his hands... He was pulling my face, and when I opened my eyes- his face was so close! His eyes were closed, and he kept pulling. I completely froze as he, Judd Birch, KISSED ME ON. THE. LIPPPPSS!

My mind was going haywire! As my love bug was flying everywhere, giggling and smiling, glowing as bright as the sun.

I didn't even realize that Judd pulled away- "What's wrong?" He muttered.

Sh*t. I didn't even realize I wasn't kissing him back- "N-nothing."

"Don't lie-" He said, but I interrupted him by kissing him.

"Don't overthink it." I smiled slightly at him. "I feel better now. Thank you." I spoke as I hugged him, resting my head on his shoulder. He placed a hand around me- hugging me back.

A/n

Oops- I didn't mean to make it this long- lol 😅 Not going to lie though; it was really fun writing this. I might actually make more fanfics for him too... 🤔😊 Anyway, sorry if some of the characters were out of character- overall, I hope you guys enjoyed it!

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h2oblooky · 1 year

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Luigi, finally losing his cool with Bowser: look, I get it! You don't want me as a soulmate! And I don't blame you, who would?! but can you please shut up about it for five seconds so we can figure this out?

Bowser: That's not why I'm upset!

Luigi: then why?! Why haven't you stopped complaining about it?!

Bowser: cause you deserve better!

Luigi:...

Bowser: you... Deserve so much better then I could ever be

#bowuigi #bowluigi #bowser x luigi #king bowser #luigi #luigi mario #soulmate au #this is different au then my last post #mutual feelings #both are just idiots who cant talk about their feelings

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dumblr · 6 months

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#quotes #feelings #facts #wise words #thoughtful #true story #mutual feelings #i don't care #inspiring words #fun facts #dumblr

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blueberrypancakesworld · 10 months

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Strawberry field

warning : fluff, tiny comfort, kiss, implied secret relationship, cheating, having feelings for eachother

Samuel Lafferty x fem reader

masterlist

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The warm summers in Utah were long, tough and warm above all. Besides the normal things to cool off like ice cream, a fan, swimming or just escaping into the shade. There were also the sun worshippers and beach goers who just looked forward to the sun and the tan - a good day at the beach. Or a day in the cool house with the family playing board games.

Whatever you did, there was always something to spend. Or you went to an ice cream parlour and bought an gelato, to the lake for a swim or just to walk around it. Or just jumping into your own cool pool, there really was a lot to do - at first glance everyone seemed to be having fun.

But then there was Y/n, the young saleswoman/cashier at the large field of strawberries at the edge of the town, which adjoined the whole field and stood there. Under the small shelter that looked like a big red strawberry and showed a sign with prices and opening hours.

Although she almost died from the heat and her vision showed once too many strawberries, she was still quite stable. Even though the movement to the baskets she handed to the shoppers was now automatic. Just like the collecting and weighing before she hid the visitors from the consumers with a ,,I hope you like them".

As well as removing a spider from small children or helping them up and shouting at them when they stepped on the strawberries. ,,Only two more hours" she muttered as she looked at her watch and sighed for the hundredth time as the sun seemed to torment her even more.

But her colleagues had also finished their shift an hour ago and she was left behind. ,,Only for a tenner more" she grumbled and inwardly slapped herself on the forehead that she had let herself be persuaded to do the extra shift. It was just too hot and too much and definitely too many kids.

Laying back down at the wooden counter and drinking her soda, which was already warm, she almost choked when she saw Samuel Lafferty coming towards her with his daughters in tow. Thank you dear sun for bringing him here she prayed to the celestial body as she felt her senses seem to go out of control.

Concentrating on him and completely blocking out the screaming children. She hadn't really gotten over him since she had to look after his children. It might have been a little more than a crush, but this one was unexpected, wasn't it?

Smiling at him, she straightened up slightly from her tired posture and leaned forward slightly. ,,Good day Samuel, how are you?" she asked and already had three baskets in her hand which were taken from her by his children who did not listen to their father and just ran off.

,,Little beasts as you can see we are doing too well" he mumbled with a chuckle and looked after his children before turning to her and taking out his wallet. ,,And yet we love them," she replied and saw his smirk as his bright blue eyes caught hers before she took his money and gave him a basket as well. Just as she was about to take her hand back, he suddenly held it more firmly.

It was not painful, but rather friendly, engaging. Caring. ,,How about I pay you a ten more and then you come and pick strawberries you have to get back before you get here so one round?" he asked and gave her a smile even though there was a hint of excitement in his eyes as if he was just waiting for a suitable answer.

,,I don't know," she mumbled and looked around the shelter as if her boss was standing there watching her. ,,Come on, it'll be fun," she heard his voice before a defeated smile spread across her face and she came out of the shelter before standing next to him and the two of them walked behind the children.

She felt her gaze land on him again and again his hair, which he had tied into a braid, had lost a few strands that played around his face. Not here, she admonished herself as she suppressed the urge to brush the strand of hair from his face and began to pick a few strawberries with him.

Choosing the most beautiful among the remaining ones left behind, she put them one by one into the small basket. She heard him murmur a song she had already heard him sing. Together with his family in the church, she had only gone because of him.

But every damn minute had been worth it. To have received the body from him, to put the plate on her tongue, not breaking eye contact, and to drink the wine from the chalice he held out to her. A pleasant shiver of memories came over her as she thought back to the many services.

Looking at Samuel he saw him looking at a relatively large, well-formed strawberry, his fingers lightly rolling it back and forth before he murmured, ,,You look good," before gently placing the strawberry in his basket and Y/n seriously considered for a moment whether it was still about the strawberry or something else entirely.

Agreeing with him, the two continued to collect strawberries before they heard the happy laughter of the children running back to their father who greeted them happily. ,,Well then, let's go back," he announced, carrying all the baskets with him, even if a little crookedly, but still with a proud smile.

The first few metres, on the other hand, went well. Well, except that the cry of one of his children jolted him out of concentration so that he didn't see the root on the ground in front of him and took a lunge.

Before some of the inherited berries scattered on the ground. After realising that his children were fine, he sighed and knelt down to put the strawberries back into the basket. Y/n didn't waste a second before she knelt down and helped put the strawberries away, earning a ,,Thank you my dear" from Samuel.

In a typical cliche, they both grabbed a strawberry at the same time and neither really knew who to let go. ,,Thanks again for doing all this," he said suddenly, handing the heirloom to her even though a fonger remained on her hand for a moment longer than was necessary.

Watching him rise and help her up, she replied, ,,Sure, I'd be happy to do it for you and the others". Before the two of them looked at each other one more time before they went back towards the beginning and with it the shelter.

Adding her own basket to the ones already there, she stood behind the trusses and began to pack the earth berries. Completely absorbed, she watched Sammuel look at another strawberry and then ate it.

How do I become a strawberry? she asked herself before she turned back to packing, shaking her head slightly. ,,Say, sweetheart, how would you like to babysit again like you did back then?" he asked, leaning slightly on the wood and leaning forward, the smell of wood and leather coming clearly to her.

And once again she felt the connection flash. ,,Of course, when should I come?" she agreed, already feeling the anticipation of not only taking care of his enchanting children again, but also of being with him indirectly.

Slight surprise showed on her face as he came closer and closer. ,,Tonight would be best and well...I would like to reward you with a dinner in a restaurant" he spoke more calmly but not full of shame.

On the contrary, he seemed more than sure of himself. No direct payment but a meal alone with him she thought and the smirk on her lips seemed to please him more and more.

She felt his fingers go to a strand of her hair and twirl it slightly before he slid his fingers down her arm to her hands. ,,I'll take that as a yes...see you later my dear" he mumbled.

In a moment when they both seemed alone he kissed her hand gently before taking the strawberries and giving her one last loving look before walking back to the car with his children. ,,A date how scandalous" she muttered as she realised that the normally devout Samuel Lafferty was anything but. No, he was a sinner in his lust eaten inerem. And she was his sin that wanted him all the more.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

@707otto , @roryculkinsbf thought you too might like it

#under the banner of heaven samuel lafferty #under the banner of heaven #samuel lafferty #samuel lafferty x reader #rory culkin #fluff #strawberry #field #tiny comfort #kiss #on the hand #hand holding #implied secret relationship #cheating #having feelings #mutual feelings

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hellcheerficdatabase · 6 months

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jump into the fire and run

Author: @hearjessroarfics

Rating/Warning: Teen and up audience, referenced ED

Chapter Count: 1/1

Description:

Chrissy fucking Cunningham, with her pretty blue eyeshadow and her beautifully crooked front teeth, smiling down at him like he’s got her world on a string, like he, Eddie Munson, could be worth gold in her eyes and she doesn’t even have to dig for it.

What in the goddamn hell.

In which Chrissy is not Vecna's first victim, but the fourth. And that makes a difference.

Tags: Alternate Universe- canon divergence, alternate universe- everyone lives and nobody dies, getting together, introspection, they're in loveeee, fluff, mutual feelings, Eddie POV, one-shot, status: completed

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euesworld · 11 months

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"I have this uncanny urge to gaze deeply into your eyes and lose myself in the ocean of love that I find there.. a league or twenty thousand deep with a creature of lust staring back at me."

I could go swimming in those Caribbean eyes - eUë

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bl-bam-beyond · 5 months

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PURE VANILLA: RECIPE FOR ROMANCE (2023, SINGAPORE)

BL SHORT FILM (CONTINUATION)

Charlie (SOH DENG XUN) is an adorable shy pastry chef working for Gabriel (BRAVEN YEO) in a small bakery/cafe. Charlie has a crush on Gabriel.

Gabriel feels the same. In the continuation of this BL Short (Available on 250 Films YouTube Channel) Charlie and Gabriel await a reporter doing a story on their bakery/cafe. His name is Alex (LEON KOH)

Alex it so happens went to school with Charlie and has a crush on him from their school days...a secret crush which he reveals (cue Gabriel's competition)

Charlie is surprised by Alex's feelings but its Gabriel he wants. So he heads over to Gabriel's place.

@pose4photoml @lutawolf @kingofthereblog-boysloveed

#SINGAPOREAN BL SHORT FILM #PART 2 #GABRIEL AND CHARLIE #CO-WORKERS #MUTUAL FEELINGS #LAST MINUTE COMPETITION #250 FILMS YOUTUBE CHANNEL #IST SHORT ALSO AVAILABLE ON GAGAOOLALA AS WELL AS 250 FILMS YOUTUBE CHANNEL #My GIFS #MYGIFSET #MY-GIF-EDIT #BL-BAM-BEYOND FAMILY OF BLOGS

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sunset-sprinkles · 8 months

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My Lovely liar (2023) - episode 6

The fact their feelings are growing so gradually and naturally, it feels so warm to see them worrying and caring about each other. At this point both of them have their own traumas which stopped them from expressing more towards the relationship, but I love how Solhee is really that 'light' which has brought Doha out of that 'darkness' he had forced himself into. And I am more eager to see how he heals her from her trauma of drifting away from her relationships?! Their mutual attraction definitely gives me butterflies and their chemistry is cherry on the top.

#my lovely liar #kim so hyun #hwang minhyun #love #my lovely liar ep6 #couple goals #headers #kdrama #rainbow #date night #soccer #mutual feelings #caps

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bythevay · 1 year

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@sabezraweek Day 2: More than friends This is actually the first pic I drew in procreate! I wanted them to be flustered due to realising that the other might be more than a friend to them 👀 Corona set me back for making art on time for this week, but I will have some more afterwards.

#star wars fanart #star wars #star wars rebels #sabine #sabine wren #ezra bridger #ezrabridger #sabezraweek2022 #more than friends #mutual feelings #mutual pining #mandalorian #jedi #jedi padawan #padawan #fanart #sabezra

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elitadream · 1 year

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OKAY- hear me out, please-

I’m curious to know if Mario or Peach were to confess their feelings to the other (hypothetically speaking of course), who would be the first to say it?

I know they are both hopeless romantics and are too shy to make a move. Mario may feel like he’s not worthy to have someone as beautiful and truly amazing as his Princess Peach. Surely Peach must feel the same way about that, despite her position as the Princess of the Mushroom Kingdom. But I think those two have been through enough as it is to be able to grow close and be able to be more open, and maybe be able to share some personal things.

Regarding the way said moment would go, I've developped a rather specific vision over time. :3 🎇 I like to imagine that, as opposed to having one of them readily and openly confessing to the other, it would be more of a confused, anxious back and forth leading to the big reveal.

Maybe they would both be checking on one another after a battle, or a very tense and dramatic moment in which they would both have feared for the other's life. Each would see how overwhelmed the other is, and they couldn't stop telling each other how scared they were and how much the other means to them. Cue a flustered and incredulous pause as something in the air would shift, followed by a timid inquiry on both sides. A bewildered sort of epiphany; and shy but desperately hopeful spark of understanding. And then suddenly, everything would click into place.

A staggering, suspended "You too??" moment where they would each realize, finally, that the other had been feeling the same way all this time. 🥲💞

I haven't figured out the full context yet, but I'll very likely draw this scene at some point. 💫

#Mario #Princess Peach #Mareach #confession #mutual feelings #romance #headcanons #Super Mario Bros

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hgulnaz · 2 months

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duniyā kī mahfiloñ se uktā gayā huuñ yā rab

kyā lutf anjuman kā jab dil hī bujh gayā ho

shorish se bhāgtā huuñ dil DhūñDtā hai merā

aisā sukūt jis par taqrīr bhī fidā ho

martā huuñ ḳhāmushī par ye aarzū hai merī

dāman meñ koh ke ik chhoTā sā jhoñpaḌā ho

āzād fikr se huuñ uzlat meñ din guzārūñ

duniyā ke ġham kā dil se kāñTā nikal gayā ho

lazzat sarod kī ho chiḌiyoñ ke chahchahoñ meñ

chashme kī shorishoñ meñ baajā sā baj rahā ho

gul kī kalī chaTak kar paiġhām de kisī kā

sāġhar zarā sā goyā mujh ko jahāñ-numā ho

ho haath kā sirhānā sabze kā ho bichhaunā

sharmā.e jis se jalvat ḳhalvat meñ vo adā ho

mānūs is qadar ho sūrat se merī bulbul

nanhe se dil meñ us ke khaTkā na kuchh mirā ho

saf bāñdhe donoñ jānib buuTe hare hare hoñ

naddī kā saaf paanī tasvīr le rahā ho

ho dil-fareb aisā kohsār kā nazāra

paanī bhī mauj ban kar uTh uTh ke dekhtā ho

āġhosh meñ zamīñ kī soyā huā ho sabza

phir phir ke jhāḌiyoñ meñ paanī chamak rahā ho

paanī ko chhū rahī ho jhuk jhuk ke gul kī Tahnī

jaise hasīn koī ā.īna dekhtā ho

mehñdī lagā.e sūraj jab shaam kī dulhan ko

surḳhī liye sunahrī har phuul kī qabā ho

rātoñ ko chalne vaale rah jaa.eñ thak ke jis dam

ummīd un kī merā TuuTā huā diyā ho

bijlī chamak ke un ko kuTiyā mirī dikhā de

jab āsmāñ pe har sū bādal ghirā huā ho

pichhle pahr kī koyal vo sub.h kī mo.azzin

maiñ us kā ham-navā huuñ vo merī ham-navā ho

kānoñ pe ho na mere dair o haram kā ehsāñ

rauzan hī jhoñpaḌī kā mujh ko sahar-numā ho

phūloñ ko aa.e jis dam shabnam vazū karāne

ronā mirā vazū ho naala mirī duā ho

is ḳhāmushī meñ jaa.eñ itne buland naale

tāroñ ke qāfile ko merī sadā dirā ho

har dardmand dil ko ronā mirā rulā de

behosh jo paḌe haiñ shāyad unheñ jagā de

-Allama Iqbal, Ek Arezoo.

#ek arezoo #allama iqbal #poem #urdu ghazal #urdu shayari #iqbal #mutual feelings

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star-crossed--lovers · 5 months

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☝️👌🔊👂

Fact, not opinion.

Actions vs Words.

#Change of behavior #Change of ways #Different approach #Consideration #Love languages #Proper Communication #Full Comprehension #Unity #Trust #Shared principles #Shared goals #Shared vision #Mutual feelings #Equal efforts #Mutual desires #On the same page

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beybladeninja · 5 months

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Now for the adorable rapper!

Here's Akira!

Akira is the God of Love (you know, because he’s so lovable). As the patron of mutual feelings, he is a very cheerful and enthusiastic god that always extends a caring hand to all those around him. His kindness and openness for others can be affectionate bordering on aggressive, which makes people tend to walk on eggshells around him.

His job is to ensure that humans eventually find a partner (or partners - poly) that they are content with spending the rest of their lives with. Each couple that comes together is by his design - he searches each human for characteristics and ideals that are similar (or different, as opposites tend to attract) to that of another human’s, then sets events into motion that will eventually lead to the two parties meeting and falling in love. If someone does not find a partner by the time it’s their turn to journey to the Spirit World, it’s most likely because Akira didn’t feel that they would be a good match for anyone - their actions and/or ideals were simply too abrasive for him to match them with someone.

Akira mainly represents the emotions that come with being in love, the similar feelings of safety and certainty that stems from being with someone that you truly care for. Though if a couple does decide to get frisky, he’s more than happy to extend the secrecy of his sleeve in order to shield their activities from the rest of the world. He also tries to give them privacy on his behalf.

What do you think of God Akira?

And hide in a safe space while you can, because Phelix is up next!

To keep the list going, who do you want to see as a god next?

#fanart #beyblade #beyburst #my art #alternate universe #beyblade burst #god universe #Akira yamatoga #love #affection #mutual feelings #significant other #significant others

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iicarusflew · 2 years

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Astronomy

Every star is born with the electrifying possibility to burn as bright as the sun, before collapsing in itself by the force of everything else.

In the end, nothing is as remarkable as the anticipation of it.

On the night of his nineteenth birthday, Draco Malfoy ponders on the history of his eponym and tries to decide if he is doomed like the constellation. If all he’s ever going to be is the grimy mould he finds himself coiled by already. And if it’s true, if all we are is what we’ve been, then Hermione Granger might actually be right on her decision to leave him for good.

The birth of a star is a tedious thing.

In theory it sounds remarkable; floating masses of clouds collapsing on each other by the force of gravity, the pull of the mass being unbearable, unignorable. It takes an excruciating amount of miracles to happen at exactly the right time, the right place, for enough energy to build, for the molecules in the gasses and particles to start fusing with one another and form the protostar, which then goes onward to a new life.

Every star is born with the electrifying possibility to burn as bright as the sun, before collapsing in itself by the force of everything else.

In the end, nothing is as remarkable as the anticipation of it.

___

It’s unseasonably cold in the astronomy tower. Dark as well, heavy masses of clouds hide everything from the stars to the moon away from the prying, hopeful eyes of people like Draco Malfoy, amateur astronomer, foolish boy. The darkness unnerved him a little, even after all this time, even after all the darkness he coiled in before, and he wondered for a moment if he could go back to the common room and face Pansy with some semblance of dignity. Pansy who with flushed cheeks and the shrill, excruciatingly caring voice, argued with him. The remnants of the conversation treks his thoughts and he sighs. He could go back, he could—

No.

In the end he decided to wait it out, the chill, the dark. And like almost all the other times, it set in. He swings his legs passively from the edge of the parapet now. He stares up at the sky but there isn’t much to see, he stares down at the front gates and there isn’t anything to look forward to. He thinks of whistling after a few moments. After it’s as close to comfort as he can get. The cold felt like a familiar sheet of skin on top of his own. The darkness now feels like his shadow.

It’s good , he tells himself. It’s perfect.

There is an unopened gift box beside him. Green and silver wrapped, shiny. Even the covering gives the aura of senseless wealth. Well, wealth and his mother. When he picked it up from his owl this morning it felt like wood, it felt heavy. The letter in his hand is unopened, too. The seal of it bears the proud Malfoy emblem. On the top left corner of the back of the envelope, his mother’s slant handwriting reads—

To my dearest son, you are as bright as the constellations.

He snorts involuntarily. His mother has a habit of sending his gifts a day before his birthday so he wouldn’t have to wait even a second. His mother has a habit of overplaying his rather frail achievements.

___

The constellation that he is named after used to be a remarkable thing. One of the brightest stars of the constellation Draco, Thuban, was the pole star, the very centre of heaven. Heaven rotated around the axis of its star and Draco was the proud and undeterred centre, a symbol of eternity.

But the earth moved on. Slowly, deliberately, changed its axis. So now Draco is not the centre, not anything remarkable at all. Just a blot in the sky with a rich, crowning, overplayed history. It stands as a remembrance of the past and the ancient fascination and myths made by men, myths of dragons and heros and eternity. While in reality, it’s not even the largest constellation, nor the brightest. Its value is in its past, its history is everything that’s remarkable about it. That’s ever going to be remarkable about it.

Draco thinks it’s quite poetic, if he’s honest.

He thinks his parents have named him perfectly.

___

He picks up his gift again, absentmindedly thinking about what demands he’d made to his mother a year or two ago. His mother is a determined woman. Her love is as tenacious and tedious as the birth of a star.

He thinks he asked for a new telescope.

He doesn’t think he’ll be needing it anytime soon. And anyway, birthdays are overrated, self-serving. Nothing changes after you’ve been in the earth for another year. Nothing but more mistakes and regrets.

And god he misses Pansy and her senseless nihilism they used to share. The philosophy is losing her as she’s running around with Potter. And it’s even worse, one of them being sure stings worse than neither of them being sure. And it’s worse that he thought he was happy, that he’s finally found something— someone— to hold on to. But the memory of this morning stings his head still as he shivers from the unlikely cold in the astronomy tower, still as he feels the excruciating, nauseating burn of being alone, he stands by it. Having a birthday party as their common room seemed like the anatomy of a disaster, with all the conflicting loyalties and shifting perspectives. A few months ago, Pansy would get that. Unfortunately, dating Potter has a rather glowing, nauseating effect on her.

He wonders what effect he shows. Dating—

“There you are,” a tersely familiar voice calls from behind. And he straightens up a little, makes a shift in his space like it’s a habit.

Hermione Granger doesn’t budge when he doesn’t answer. She waits a moment, an eternity, then the steady taps of his feet make his heart stutter as the realization—stupid, familiar realization—hits that she isn’t going away this time either.

She sits beside him. And the familiar gust of her perfume—cinnamon and clove—makes the air warmer, it seems. Makes it more humid. More like reminiscence.

“What are you doing here?” she says, her voice a sharp, citrusy cut in the air. It makes him trip back from his thoughts about stars and supernovas and the universe and land to the memory of three days back. Her hushed moans when he got down on his knees in the corner of the empty Potions classroom and—

“I’ve been looking for you everywhere.”

Her voice. Please and oh gosh and more, Draco. And you’re so good, Draco.

She’s always hard on praises. And saying his name, and constructing his doom.

Her voice. It makes him warm amidst the chilly brush of night air.

I’ve been looking for you everywhere. How nice, how soft, how unlike what he deserves.

“Why?”

It’s a game of theirs. A rather one sided, self-deprecating game. Hermione Granger tries to be nice to him, he tries to thwart all the warm advances of her well-meaning heart with a force that should be commedable, that should be enough, but somehow isn’t. Somehow he still finds himself cornered with her, with his lips on hers and his hands around her throat not gripping, but squeezing. Softly, like he’s handling something delicate, like he’s handling his own scared heart in the gap between his palms. He angles their bodies perfectly when they kiss, not one inch of gap between them. Not one tiny scrap of air as he dips in and tastes her.

Granger tries to be delicate with him as well and in return gets something harsh. Something he hides—well, used to hide —in the locked closet of his heart. Some animal with a snarl and grimy talons and a jagged laceration on the middle of his chest made with his own claws. It’s something visceral that she brings out of him. It’s painful.

An ache.

A plea.

A wish.

Granger pffts. There’s a rustle of her robes as she sits beside him, feet hanging off the rails in imitation. He stares at the night sky littered with dead stars. He imagines her rolling her eyes. “Will you ever get tired of asking it?”

“Only if you get tired of answering it.”

She sighs in answer, but Draco knows the intricacies of her expressions by now. She’s not exasperated, she’s apprehensive. She is toying with him, enjoying the habit of being close to him.

“I was looking for you because I brought something for you.”

That cuts his gaze. He hesitates before tilting his head to find her staring at him the way she always does. Unafraid. Undeterred. She looks pretty in the rippling light of the moon. Hair askew, rouge frizzy strands everywhere like a haystack; the bags under her eyes are shadowed, hollowed in the mellow light. Her eyes are darker. She’s smiling.

“Happy birthday.”

___

The newborn star is sometimes larger than even the sun, burning softer, mellower. Centaurs can observe such a thing with their naked eyes. The young star is a brilliant green mist with bursts of red around its edges, with unfused clouds and dust particles cocooning its sides. Draco has a telescope his father gifted him for his sixth birthday, it was charmed to look through space-time and watch the course of a star from the past, into the future. He used it the night of his sixth birthday. He couldn’t understand any of it, but he thought it looked magnificent.

Now he knows better. The birth of a star takes a million years. A million, precarious years to burn and fuse and become . At first a star sprouts out to be as big as the sun, and just as bright. But nature intervenes. The energy inside it burns and burns out and dies little by little. And the end result is something much less remarkable than the beginning suggested.

The death of a star… well.

Stars take a billion years to burn out. Sometimes it becomes a red giant before bursting into an explosive supernova. Sometimes it spreads its carcass over the cosmos and sometimes it takes eons to recover from the heat of its leftovers. But other times they die quietly, with a broken dignity. Sometimes it turns into a dark star without much of a show. And there it goes. It becomes invisible to even the centaurs.

He wonders how it might feel to be as invisible as a dark star.

His eyes cut from her face to her hand. She has a little box in her outstretched palm. A dark, velvety box, small enough for really one thing.

For a moment he can’t reply. There’s a thick blanket of air surrounding them, at this moment, at every moment they meet. And it’s glimmering, it’s shiny, it’s a sphere of trapped time and wishes.

“How did you know?” he bleats out finally.

She purses her lips, narrows her eyes. He’s never met anyone as open as her before. Every line of her face betrays—always betrays—what she’s thinking. He’s never been so fascinated by this sort of idiosyncrasy before.

She thinks it’s a ridiculous question, but it’s not. Draco knows it isn’t. There is no conceivable reason for her to—

“Why won’t I know?”

He blinks. She rolls her eyes.

“When is my birthday?”

The answer trips from out of his mouth as instantly as it trips in his brain. He can’t stop it. He says, “September nineteenth.”

She raises her eyebrows. See? she’s thinking. And he does see now. His eyes widen, lips part and he vaguely remembers that he ought to feel embarrassed, for being proved wrong, for being called out on the facade. But—

“Oh,” he is all that comes out of his parched mouth. “Oh.”

She smiles again. Really, how can she not run out of them? “You’re supposed to take the gift, Draco.”

He does. Picks up the box without making it obvious that he’s avoiding touching her skin. He silently undoes the tiny latch on the box, his heart in his stomach, his throat, his brain—anywhere but where it should be. And its beating is a harsh, rough cry for help. And the box is so obvious, such a thin veil hiding what’s inside, he can already see what’s inside it.

The ring is propped up against the small cushions inside the box, the velvety green cushion brightens the silver of it. When he plucks it up, tilts it to the light, he sees the miniscule stars engraved on the metal, scatter of stars pleated into the skin, joined by a single, connecting thread. He doesn’t need to count the numbers to know how many are there. The stars shimmers, just like the—

“The constellation Draco,” Granger says, breathes out, really, with the huff and puff and exasperated breathlessness unique to her. To her, for him. “I thought—well, since your name means something so beautiful, I thought… I mean…”

“What are you doing?” he snaps.

“What?”

“What are you doing here with me? Why are you giving me gifts? I never gave you gifts.”

Granger blinks, as if suddenly cut off from a daze. “I—uh, what?”

“Why are you giving me this gift?” He gets up, backs up from her so he can breathe functionally. Hermione’s stare follow him and he is trying so fucking hard not to let the crack in his ribcage show. The crack that’s been settling since this morning, since he overheard her say—

“It’s your birthday, Draco.”

“I know .” He does. And he also knows gifts are just a gateway to pillage. His father was a politician. He knows that you give something to get something. The bulls lead as an offering were trussed up with flowers and honey in ancient Greece. The offering was burnt up in a fire as big as a tower. Staring at Hermione Granger’s pretty, lovely face, Draco is sure the fire looked just as magnificent as she does.

“Well, I—you…”

“I know why you’re giving me this,” his voice comes out hoarse, strangled.

“Because it’s—”

“Because you want to break up with me.”

She looks completely aghast. “Excuse me?”

Oh god. Is this the moment where she tells him they weren’t in a relationship to begin with?

“I heard you talking to Potter this morning.”

She blinks. There’s a flutter of clarity before it muddles up again. Draco can’t look away for the love of his sanity. “I still don’t understand,” she says, but she trembles.

“I heard you.” His teeth mash together. The two of them were standing against the wall in front of Charms. He was hunched behind the giant pillar beside. “You said the next summer is going to change everything. You said… you’ll end it.”

Her eyes widen. She gets up now. “Oh, Draco—”

“And… I get it, okay? I—this was all…” Too big to hope, too big to ask for. “We are both so different. And I know you’ll try to make it easier for me because I know you have stupid saviour complex and I know you don’t want to do more damage to me as it is, but, Merlin fuck, Granger, you don’t need to try so hard to… but Potter?”

“Draco, this wasn’t—”

“You couldn’t tell me? You had to ask for his fucking—”

“Draco, stop!”

He does. Partly because of her shrillness, partly because he is finally short on air.

“I wasn’t going to… I was telling him that I decided to have sex with you!”

“What?”

Her voice catches on itself. “The final barrier. The… bridge I wasn’t ready to cross. I was telling him—”

“You’ll end it.”

“End this stupid habit of reparation. Building forts and distancing between myself and what makes me happy. It’s burning me out, not being completely honest. Surrounding myself with excuses, but I… I wasn’t thinking of breaking up with you.”

“Am I burning you out?”

“ What?” she bleats. “No. That’s… that’s the complete opposite of what I said.”

He is heaving. He has a hard time believing her. “You said this vacation will change everything.”

“Yes. It will. If you were going to eavesdrop, you should’ve waited for the entire context.”

“But you… but I—” How could she not be ready to leave him? All he does is hiss and bite and slither inside the skin he has hated his entire life. He knows in the few months of being with her that she can see past all this… but then why doesn’t she coil in disgust?

___

Hermione moves forward. The gap between their bodies is contracted until there’s nothing else, until she’s just there. And half of him wants to get away from her to do the noble thing, half of him wants to never let her go.

Anticipation is all he feels. Trepidation. The shiver the spark the electricity of it. It’s been there since the start of this year, it’s been consistent every time they kiss. Every step he takes to her he takes thinking about the next one, and the one after that. Everything is a pandemonium and a premonition. Drop to your knees like it’s a prayer, taste her, make her come. Make sure you didn’t wear the mask when you got out of your dorm, make sure your mask doesn’t fall off anyway. Treat her good, make her feel good to make up for all the times you couldn’t— didn’t.

He tries to do that… all of that. But it doesn’t work. He keep leaking out the rotten parts of him as well. Stars showing the scars, starts being too intimate, too personal… too honest. He moans out requests when she is breaking in front of him, when he’s most vulnerable.

Tell me how I make you feel, he pants, his lips glistening from the wetness of her. Her answering whimpers are the result of him sucking on her swollen clit.

Is it good? Because he’s only ever been as good as people saw him.

In the height of her orgasm she only offers, Yes, so good so good

But when they recover, she tells him more. He is good, he is brilliant and curious and empathetic and—

“Leaving you is the farthest thing from my mind,” she whispers.

“Granger—”

“You’re kind of the only thing that makes my life bearable.”

She’s as bright as the star. But stars burn out. The fuel that makes them shimmer and shine also makes them spent. The warmth Hermione Granger brings in people’s lives must chafe away her own self-preservation. A star takes a billion years to perish; how much longer does she have? How is that compromised if she hovers around the likes of him?

Draco, as ancient a history as the constellation he is named after. Once the centre of heaven, now pushed to the side.

Before he can stop himself, he is whispering too, “It can’t work. Granger… Hermione, I am—you are—”

“What?”

“Don’t you see? I’m ancient history. My story’s already been written. I’m rotten. I am… nothing.”

She stands on her toes, circles her hands around the nape of his neck. “You are everything .”

He scoffs. She is the tenacious sort, too.

She pulls him closer. She is the only thing visible in the hollow world. “You’re not any more damaged than the rest of us, Draco. You just decide to punish yourself for it. Under all this resistance I know—I’ve seen— who you really are. You’re not as hopeless as you think you are. You are strong and brilliant and tenacious . I think I’m in love—”

He kisses her. It’s hurried, it’s rushed and sloppy because nothing is ever as good as the anticipation of it. The rest of the sentence get’s muffled in the space between their mouths. She chokes out a breath, a half moan as he slips his tongue inside her mouth. There is a grip on his hair, there’s a knot in his heart. He breaks down when they break apart.

“Tell me in the morning,” he whispers hoarsely. “In the light. Because I do. I love you. It scares me so much. I love you.”

Hermione’s eyes melt, shine and shimmer. It’s an entire ocean of words, it’s language in its entirety. He can spend his whole summer looking at them. He can spend a lifetime.

“I love you. I’ll say it again in the morning.”

There’s anticipation teeming for the next kiss. As thick and irreproachable as magic . Pure and undiluted. Magic coarse enough to burn his bones. strong enough to smooth whatever damage it’s going to leave. Absentmindedly, he wonders about the first man who discovered the constellation, his namesake. And about the one who determined it was the centre of the sky. And even more bleakly, at the back of his head, he wonders if it could rival the exhilaration that comes with the knowledge that there is something in this world who loves you even after seeing the very worst of you.

He doubts it.

She smells of cinnamon and books. The anticipation is electrifying, cursing his bones, mending it. He wonders how he looks to her. He thinks he knows the answer.

___

The kiss, as it turns out, is just as good as the anticipation of it.

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