#literally no matter the time they take the picture ray looks like he’s playing his torussy off
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Highlights from the AJ Pen webcast on the My Chemical Romance Foundations Tour set and lighting design book:
“[Gerard Way] was the most- he was the one that I was interfacing with most to come up with this design. Although the rest of the band did have their own say in one way or another. And he in his other life is a comic book author who wrote the Umbrella Academy. So I did a deep dive into comic books to sort of, understand his world a bit more. And I thought I'd throw a little nod to the comic book world with this sort of cartoonish call-out box [in the design book].”
“This picture from a Nine Inch Nails show is something that Gerard sent me. And he was, when he was asking me to make the color palette look washed out and not necessarily all bold colors, he wanted it to sort of have a sense of being weathered.”
“We took an approach where each song had its own kind of color and it wasn't just one color across all of the lights. We'd take groups of lights, randomize the selection set over the whole rig, and then sort of stretch that make the colors in a neighborhood.”
“That drape is actually black. That's lit with just four or five Mac ultras to give it this lovely red color.”
“Thank you to Gerard Way for working so directly with me on the creative for this project. And then the rest of the band, Ray, Mikey, and Frank, they all had their own say and their own take on this project. And it was a very collaborative effort with me and the band.”
“One cool thing about this band is they play, they're analog. They just play. The drummer listens to a metronome that's just coming off his iPad. So there's no time code. There's no reference. All I know is that more or less they're going to be playing at the same tempos. Although sometimes he would shut off mid song because he would push and pull the tempo bottom style.”
“I will say that for this band the drummer that plays with them didn't chart on most of the records... And he likes to try to really recreate what each drummer that tracked the records was doing.”
"We didn't have any video content to play. Other than there were a few things that our video director, Robbie came up with to mix in with the IMAG. So we did carry IMAG screens and he did mix in a little bit of content, but for the most part, it was basically IMAG and a set on stage.”
“The reason that this set worked without like, a bunch of video screens on stage really well for this band was they never played the same set list twice. And I don't mean that they just had a set list that they had a couple of songs they'd swap out. I had to plead with them to keep the first song to be the same so that we could drop the Kabuki in the same place every day.”
“So once that first song was out of the way, they literally crumpled up the set list from the night before, threw it out... And that's why this sort of set design approach worked. The band would tell their own story because they know their music. I never had a set list feel like it was dragging or wasn't telling the story in some way of what's within their music. They know how to rearrange things and we just programmed each song so that it would stand on its own and work no matter where it ended up in the set list.”
Watch the webcast here! Take a look at the book here!
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☆彡PHANTOM TROUPE RELATIONSHIP HCS ☆彡
(separate)
Disclaimer: Credits to the artists!! I own none of these pictures!
I procrastinated on these for way too long.. still! Enjoy! <3 (these exclude hisoka & Kalluto)
Chrollo:
Chrollo is a lover that takes care of whom he loves!
therefore, he takes care of you!
Any hobbies you have, he’ll indulge in them with you
any supplies you need for said hobbies?
art supplies, ski gear, ice skates, computer, hiking equipment!
The list goes on
even if you never actually use the stuff he buys he doesn’t mind :)
cuz hey! He didn’t actually buy it! 🤪
chrollo will truly do anything in his power to keep you happy
and we all know power is something he certainly does have
he can buy you a luxury house and car all the way down to cuddling in the warm rays of the sunset while having a cookout
i guarantee if your upset, he’ll make you happy within the next hour
chrollo probably never learned how to love properly
but with you?? The definition of love doesn’t matter.
he’s just grateful he has it.
you make him feel like he knows what he’s doing with himself in life.
he’s less lost, if I may say.
he’s found a home, in you.
Nobunaga:
nobunaga was never familiar with love and never even thought about the fact that he wasn’t interested!
but here you are simply having a conversation, chatting.
and yet even with such a simple act he feels so nervous?? While excited and happy at the same time??
he wonders why he even feels so fidgety!
your just talking!!
how on the earth are you making him act a fool like this?!
like yeah your pretty and he likes your personality and you two have the same interests plus all of your interactions have gone good…..man he really is in love huh
WHAT IS THIS SOME SAPPY ROMANCE MOVIE?
now I know it only seems like he has a crush
but you two are actually already in the relationship!!
and yes, he still gets nervous. The feeling never goes away
once he tried to ask if you still get butterflies n stuff and if you said no he was so embarrassed!!!!
seriously he brushes it off like it didn’t bother him and never brings it up again
Feitan:
feitan will probably do better with a nonchalant or sadist partner so 1) you can enjoy torturing with him or 2) you won’t care or get grossed out that he does
If your not doesn’t matter he’s still gonna anyway-
he’s not the typa dude to change for love
but that aside
he likes your quiet company
so like reading together (whether it’s two different books or not)
and reviewing to each other
learning new skills from/with each other
actually sometimes feitan teaches you cool human body facts!!
Like how brains are around 60% fat!
or that they weight 3 pounds! ;D
how cool is that?!
yes this is his tastes in topics and humor
and he only laughs if you say stuff like “gross!” Or “ew that’s disgusting!”
he will be satisfied if you find it cool too
Long story short don’t go into his library
you won’t find any books you like there unless you like what he does
Machi:
She’s an assertive domestic girlfriend
Plus she’s really caring
but caring doesn’t always mean sweet and happy all the time
while she has no problem taking care of you..
you better either get up and do some things yourself or return the favor !
She expects you to at least be able to get daily tasks done
either that or clean the whole house like she was gonna do. you choose.
your place is probably really simple yet well decorated
Not for an aesthetic but because of just general things you have
like a shoe rack, the pretty furniture and rugs, the dart board she owns, any hobby equipment you own (easel, paintings, hockey equipment, hiking equipment, etc)
it all just makes a really cozy look for your house
and yes you two definitely play darts together
she will win unapologetically and won’t hold back
she wants to genuinely see you improve so she doesn’t go easy on you
“You can’t get better by playing against somebody worse than you”
Phinks:
phinks in a relationship is literally the definition of a guy who could pull more if he was less nervous
but he obviously pulled you and that’s what matters most
he gets flustered easily but tries to hide it
(Spoiler: he fails)
phinks will try to be romantic but it’ll either get ruined by his friends crashing the date
*ahem* shal and fei 😒(😂💗)
or he’ll just be so incredibly nervous that it doesn’t go as smoothly as he planned
he thinks up these brilliant romantic scenarios in his head but can never seem to execute them 🤨😕
it’s the thought that counts 🤷♀️💝
he would truly be such a romantic if he could just stop freaking out
I mean don’t get me wrong it’s not like it never works
when it does, he’s excited in the moment
but as soon as it’s over he’s worrying like crazy about how he’s gonna upstage that from last time
Especially without screwing up and making a fool of himself
little does he know you love him all the same 😂
Shalnark:
is really teasing and playful so I hope your not hot headed
if your aren’t and choose to prank him back instead?
it literally becomes prank wars
at some point the pranks started a real (petty) argument
after it was settled you decided not to terrorize each other anymore
now you target the troupe with your antics! 😆
your main victim is phinks
mostly because his reaction is really funny
Plus he’s the easiest to get mad
LOL
but back to the original topic where your hot headed….
yeah the argument probably ended up happening sooner than not
although at first he doesn’t take it seriously because your always getting mad like this
then you say something that makes him realize your serious
he feels really stupid for not noticing sooner
he’ll genuinely apologize (for literally once in his life)
and direct his pranks to someone else
after that you probably end up watching the victims and find it funny too
so you still end up bonding over it 😅💖
Franklin:
Franklin is not necessarily gentle
he’s just more coolheaded than not
like the time he started fighting with uvogin in the 1999 version
like he’s chill until you say the wrong thing
but that’s just how he is in general
he never gets mad at s/o
his patience is infinity+ for you
You may have secretly tried to make him angry or at least annoyed-
but if it one day goes too far he says “stop.” with a very serious tone/look and you probably stop from there 😀
😗
otherwise if you don’t decide to test the waters from jump, Franklin doesn’t have many hobbies so he’ll literally just indulge in what you like
like it doesn’t even matter if he finds it boring
you’d never know because he’d be so supportive of you doing what you love
but it’s more likely than not he’ll enjoy a few
franklin is also decent at like every house chore ever, cooking, sweeping/cleaning for example
like he knows how to do everything, but he’s just average at it
Shizuku:
Shizuku is very forgetful
she forgets chores, how to cook certain things, favors you asked her to do
But you don’t have to worry about her forgetting things about you solely because she would never date anyone she doesn’t know enough to remember
She probably wouldn’t remember she likes you so why would she?!
Unless like she forgets how long she’s known you-
AND LIKE- MAGICALLY THINKS YALL BEEN FRIENDS FOR YEARS WHEN YALL MET 6 MONTHS AGO
That’s a writing prompt
she’d be remembering memories that never happened and everything 🤦♀️
But we won’t go into that here…
it’s probably low key annoying that you have to do a lot of things because she keeps forgetting
so I sure hope your patient..
“huh? You never asked me to do that..”
”no! You didn’t, I remember! you never even came in the living room!” (Her saying ‘I remember’ is ironic I know)
With a more motherly and provider mindset reader she’d do just fine
At the very least shizuku will remember your favorite things and gift you them when she can<3
isnt that sweet?!
see?? It’s not like she’s being a jerk!
she genuinely forgot!
Pakunoda:
pakunoda is wife criteria
she can do everything
she is gentle, caring and strong
she can protect and advice you
she remembers all your favorite things—everything about you!
she always cooks your favorite meals
paku loves to relax on the beach together with some wine~
she loves road trips and mini calm adventures
Take her on some!! She deserves it with all she does for you!
and you definitely do!
you guys create lots of fun and heart warming memories together
out in the grass, in the wild life, in forests, in the dessert!
she’s a great cook and a outstanding baker!! 😍😋😋
her signature dish is raspberry pie
ITS SO DELICIOUS
she makes random desserts and pastries for you as a love language
getting up to her breakfast is the best way to start your day possible
you literally can always expect a good meal with her
if you’ve been having a bad day???
at this point a bad day ain’t a bad day no more cuz you already dancing knowing she gon hook you up‼️💃🕺
Bonolenov:
bonolenov is so grateful that you act normal around him
like you have from the start, you never alienated him
before and after he took off his bandages
he can cook but others wouldn’t think so because his tribe’s traditional food is different than the norm
If you tried it and liked it he’d be overjoyed!!
He’d feel much more confident about cooking and do it for you more often
he’d low key question if your from his tribe and wonder if you’d say no to a blood test
(BRO another writing prompt!! Bonolenov finding a reader from his tribe!!)
if you didn’t like it I’m sure you let him down gently since you love him
and he gets it
maybe it was just that one dish though?
he’d want you to try a few more of different types (breakfasts, lunches, dinners, desserts and snacks) before you completely give up on it
if you truly end up not liking it he won’t be angry or anything
it simply wasn’t for you :)
he’s actually a pretty chill dude
Even more so around you
he likes to lazy around a lot and you two might cuddle often
not intentionally but like you just both end up napping together all the time
if you want he’ll teach you his tribes dances and such
as well as traditions
he’ll be impressed if you master the dances fast
(him wondering if your from his tribe again)
Even If you take a bit longer he’s patient :)
he’s open to taking off his bandages around you if your not uncomfortable
if you are that’s fine they’re pretty comfy !
Uvogin:
uvogin is very rough
I mean it’s kinda hard to be gentle at that size-
if he hurts you on accident you’ll get a brief ‘sorry’ but know it’s genuine
don’t worry it doesn’t happen often enough to be concerned
but don’t stand behind him.
you’ve learned your lesson on that….
he squashed your toes once and it was not fun
don’t get me wrong he’s not some monster
he’s just big
so he’s gotta watch out for a bunch of tiny humans you know??
okay put it like this, imagine a grown man/woman is running full speed because they’re late to work and they run into a 3 year old and knock them down
was it intentional?? No. Do they apologize and feel bad?? Yes. Is it a little funny after everything’s okay?? Also Yes.
I will say it is fun to ride on his shoulder and sit in his lap/on his leg
(another prompt could be uvogin with a s/o as big as him..)
it’s fun for him to carry you around
it’s like have a little portable buddy
that idea is kinda wholesome ☹️💗
AND DON’T FORGET HIS BIG SMOOOOOCHIES 💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋
he loves you 😊
FINALLYYYYYY GOT THIS DONE💥💥
I love the troupe :) the police needs to stop hating on they’re emo band fr 🙄✋
#anime#anime and manga#luffyvace#anime headcanons#hxh 2011#hxh anime#hxh#hunterxhunter headcanons#hunter x hunter headcanons#hunter x hunter#chrollo headcanons#chrollo lucilfer#gn <3#x gn reader#gn reader#gender neutral reader#nobunaga x reader#nobunaga hxh#feitan portor#feitan headcanons#feitan#phantom troupe#machi komachine#phinks magcub#shalnark ryusei#shizuku hxh#uvogin#bonolenov#kortopi#pakunoda
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Heartstopper Season 2 play-by-play analysis
I’ve already written all these thoughts during the last rewatch, but since I’m rewatching again to figure out which gifs I want to look for, I always end up rereading or rewriting something, adding more thoughts, etc. There’s always something to add, something new that I noticed. The next few rewatches will be all about the music, probably.
EPISODE 2 - FAMILY
- “LION FISH VERY TOXIC THEY HAVE STINGERS THAT ARE DEADLY TO THE TOUCH” “THERE ARE MANY TYPES OF FISH. HERE ARE A VARIETY OF FISH” “THAT LIVE IN THE SEA. I LOOKED UP PICTURES OF FISH ONLINE FOR THIS PAGE” “UNICORN FISH TYPES OF DEEPSEA FISH” I died reading Tao’s drawing notes.
- Why does Mr Farouk always look like he’s about to either give the scolding of a lifetime or give terrible news???? Even when he’s saying nice things. I love him, though.
- Isaac looking down at his book as he gets told to participate more.
- IS THAT DAVID THACKERAY telling Ben’s parents that Ben is wonderful? Poor thing.
- If we get Spanish-speaking Charlie at some point, I will cry.
- “I know getting your first boyfriend is very exciting, but…” Charlie’s parents will never know about Ben. The only ones who know are Nick and (somewhat) Tori, and that’s how it will stay. Was it Charlie’s first boyfriend? Technically, maybe, but in all the ways that matter, Nick is the true first, Nick has changed the game for Charlie forever. He shouted it at the sea and everything.
- Here we have the first time that Jane takes a very extreme approach, but of course she doesn’t know that Charlie has bigger problems than being distracted by his new boyfriend. Jane’s approach is complete ban, complete cut off, no in between.
- Olivia Colman, in yellow, like the ray of sunshine she is. But how Sara managed to raise someone as shit as David, when she’s so wonderful and Nick turned out so wonderful, is beyond me.
- The actor who plays David is so good, you just want to punch him.
- “the universe is pulling us apart” “we are tragic starcrossed lovers” “we should run away to paris together” “bring nellie though” “of course”… two dumbasses in love.
- Ugh, Ben seeing Nick approaching so he pulls Imogen closer and kisses her because he knows it’ll piss Nick off… And Imogen being so oblivious that she thinks nothing of Nick’s frown and not waving back. She does look a bit sad that he doesn’t. And Ben looking so smug.
- New favorite character unlocked: Sahar. We love her. I didn’t really get much personality from her in the comics, but here it’s much more fleshed out.
- “Still as desperate as ever”, excuse me? Who’s the true desperate one here? Ben gets this wistful, googly-eyed look every time Charlie appears and looks equally as murderous at Nick every time he sees them together. None ya business, Ben.
- Nick seriously telling Ben not to talk about Charlie, because that’s as much as he can do, or ignore him, but Ben won’t let it go, like he’s not even a little bit afraid of the boy that could snap him like a twig.
- “It’s not my fault he liked me before you”. EXCUSE ME, for one thing, what does that have to do with anything??? And for another thing, you really think that Charlie liked you? I don’t think Ben realizes how much Charlie’s crush on Ben was just that, a crush, but actually liking him would have probably made it harder for Charlie to break things off, and it wasn’t… I think Charlie authentically had a crush on Ben, because he’s handsome and because he took an interest in him, and because there was no one else. But liking him? Nah, that was just wishful thinking.
- “I hate you because you literally assaulted him”. YES NICK, TELL HIM.
- “I was going through personal stuff”. Everyone is always going through personal stuff, you dick. But you chose to “take it out” on Charlie.
- “You hurt him and who knows if you’ll do the same with Imogen.” Sweet Nick. “Do you even like her?”
- “Sorry, am I not allowed to like girls as well as boys?” This might be the first time that he’s been this honest with someone over whom he doesn’t have any control whatsoever. Also Nick’s face when he realizes that him and Ben are both bi, or at least that’s what Ben is telling him. And it reinforces the fear that Nick’s had since last season, that he’s just like Ben.
- “I’ll believe that when I see it.” Ben also thinks that being queer means having to tell the world, otherwise it’s not real.
- Ben saying that Charlie thinks that Nick is perfect, like… sir, you do not speak for Charlie, and you do not know Nick, and you are just trying to make yourself not look as bad, and convince yourself that you could just be as good a boyfriend to Charlie as Nick is, and why don’t you just go to therapy, SIR??? But Nick for a moment looks like he believes him, because it’s been hard for him to come out, he’s only managed to come out himself to two people, his mum and Imogen, and he knows it’s hard, and maybe Ben is right, maybe he’s just like him, maybe he’ll hurt Charlie too by keeping their relationship a secret… Him stroking the pen that Charlie gave him.
- “I’ve had the worst day haha” aw baby, the haha just makes it worse.
- I just realized how much I relate to Nick’s relationship with his brother. Not that my sister was ever as bad as a David, but I wish she had been more of a Tori… Being the youngest and having to deal with an invasive older sibling who just waltzes into your room and looks at your stuff and thinks they know you better than you know yourself… yeah… In retrospect it’s funny how siblings can be so unbearable to each other, and often it gets better when you don’t have to live together anymore, but it’s amazing how we can tick each other off, like no one else can… they did such a good job at capturing that dynamic…
-“If you do have a girlfriend, I want to know about it, she needs my approval”, sir fuck all the way off back to uni, please.
- “We could meet at the park”, and then they meet there and it’s so obvious that their homes used to be their safe places, but now, now they know that it’s each other, they’re each other’s safe place. Recharging!
- Listen, that hug, that spin hug, with the music playing, the joy on their faces as they realize that home is wherever the other one is, it’s just soooooo… it rewired my brain, it was like a deep breath, it’s the epitome of all NickxCharlie hugs. It’s one of my favorite scenes, if not the most favorite.
- I love how we got to see the beginning of Charlie’s serial hoodie thievery. This whole scene is so soft. And Nellie just makes everything ten times better.
- Nick leaning in for a kiss in an open space, and Charlie looking around nervously, because last season Nick was flinching with nerves at the idea of anyone, even strangers, seeing them kiss, and Nick knows this and he has moved past that and he pulls Charlie on top of him and just kisses him like crazy… seriously the amount of kissing this season is magical… And Charlie feeling euphoric as he walks home and sees Nick’s instagram post about him…
- Elle’s new friends are as stylish as her… Naomi’s eyeliner is perfect…
- I love that we get a little more insight into Elle’s experience, and why she wants to pursue art, and why Lambert would be a safe haven for her…
- Tao’s mum being the biggest fan of Elle and being the biggest TaoElle shipper… I’m glad we got a bit more of her, and other parents. Elle’s parents were excellent too (more on them later).
- Nick gathering up the courage to confront Imogen about Ben, because he wants to protect her, but not being able to tell her why, and Imogen getting defensive because she’s just afraid of being alone. And the whole thing affecting Nick and causing him such anxiety that he can’t really focus.
- The big hug and lift, priceless move. (I've lost count of all the times that Nick gives into his urge of picking Charlie up in any way he can).
- “That boy of yours is here”. Elle’s mum being a bit of a TaoElle shipper too. Elle trying to put distance between them.
- Charlie not being a fan of Marvel movies, whilst Joe Locke is starring soon in a Marvel streaming show… poetic. Methinks that, when the time comes for Nick to watch Agatha Coven of Darkness, he’ll have a massive crush on that actor who plays (presumably) Billy.
- “I’ll have something when I get home”, and then when he gets home “I ate at Nick’s.”
- Fucking David, snooping around, disrespecting Nick’s privacy. And Nick’s little “you okay?” at Charlie. David is such a perfect asshole, and I love Nick calling him a homophobic prick, but not being intimidated or anything. “You left a picture of you two kissing on your bedroom wall” “WHY DO YOU KEEP GOING IN MY ROOM?” Yes, David, why?
-Some people pointed out that Nick seems to unfairly take it out on his mum, when it was David, a grown man, sneaking in as he pleases, but I didn't see it that way. Nick's yelling at David, but looking at him mum, or looking to her for support, like going "do you see what he's done??? do you see what a dick your other son is???? please tell him to stop!!"
- Nick telling Charlie that it’s not his fault, and telling him that he’s fine and he doesn’t care, but Charlie had really thought he’d be able to protect Nick from the things that happened to him when he came out.
- Tao’s talk with his mum, it was so sweet.
- Charlie and Isaac being so serious, but also not arguing when Tao said “I know you’ve been laughing behind my back because I’m so oblivious”. And him asking for their help.
This episode was brought to you by HOODIES™.
#heartstopper#heartstopper season 2#heartstopper play-by-play analysis#heartstopper season two#nick and charlie#nick x charlie#heartstopper netflix
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Robby NSFW Alphabet
not my gif
A: Aftercare
Robby’s aftercare is ON POINT. He’s a huge cuddler and loves to have the chance to take care of someone who really appreciates it and takes care of him in return. He will get a soft, damp cloth and clean you off before pulling you onto his chest and wrapping you both up in tons of blankets. He likes to pet your hair while you fall asleep, and hold you so that no one can hurt you while you’re in such a vulnerable state. He knows, realistically, that no one is gonna jump out of the closet and attack you, but it makes him feel needed.
B: Body Part
His favorite body part of yours is your hands. He loves holding them up next to his and comparing, he loves holding your hand, and he loves when your hand is wrapped around his cock while y’all are in private. He can’t help but look at your left hand and picture a pretty ring on that finger, imagining the beautiful future he wants to have with you. His favorite body part of his is his butt. The boy works out, and he knows how much you like it. He honestly never noticed his butt before, whether it was nice or not, until you started pointing it out, and now he walks around in leggings just to get your attention!
C: Cum
He likes to cum in your mouth. Blowjobs make him feel like he’s in heaven, and when you swallow, it makes Robby feel like you’re accepting him and worshipping him like no one ever has before. He also likes to finish inside you (wrap it up) because of how intimate it is. Not part of the prompt, but he loves to make you sit on his face and cum all over his mouth, dirty boy.
D: Dirty Secret
Robby has always wanted to try more public sex. The thought of getting caught riles him to no end, and he gets so turned on by the idea of holding his hand over your mouth in a janitor’s closet so people walking past don’t hear your moans. If you wanted to try it, y’all would start small, like your backyard, and work your way up, but if you weren;t into it, that’s fine with him too.
E: Experience
He’s decently experienced. Robby had a one night stand or two before he met Mr. Larusso, when he hung out with those hooligans, but it never meant anything. With you, it’s his first time doing it with feelings involved, and he was blown away by how much better it was that way. He was experienced enough to not bust in T-2 minutes, but he still had a lot to learn about taking his time and making sure you both enjoyed it. With the other girls, it was always about doing it to impress his friends so he never thought much about how it felt, for him or her. You have to teach him that porn isn’t realistic, and that it takes time to feel good. He’s a fast learner though.
F: Favorite Position
He loves a good 69, lying down or standing ;) bc he’s strong like that. He also likes taking you from behind while he holds you up against him by your neck, and his other hand playing with your nipples or clit. Add a mirror, and you have the hottest sex either of you had ever had.
G: Goofy
He can be goofy during foreplay or aftercare, but Robby likes to keep it more intimate and serious during actual sex. He wants you to know that he takes you seriously, and thinks that you guys are goofy all the time, so he wants sex to be loving and heartfelt. Drunk sex can be goofy, but most of the time, he keeps it mature.
H: Hair
He will shave it off every once in a while and let it get stubbly for a couple weeks, then shave again. Robby HATES ingrown hairs, so he doesn’t like to shave every day, but he thinks just trimming makes it look sloppy. He settles for shaving every couple weeks. He literally doesn’t even notice when you don’t shave, so obviously he doesn’t care about that. Like he’s so caught up in the moment that you could put a little blue wig down there and he wouldn’t notice.
I: Intimacy
So growing up, Robby never really had people that cared a lot about him. Because of this, he lives for intimate moments. Just you guys lying on his bed playing with each other’s hair makes him swoon. He’s a romantic guy, and would definitely go all out with flower petals, candles, champagne, and bubble baths if it were a special occasion. He wants you to know that he loves you, and wants to make sure you know how much he loves you. 10/10 romance.
J: Jack off
He did it a lot before he met you, but now he prefers you. He really doesn’t feel the need to jack off because you guys are together so often. If he starts thinking about you in the shower or something, maybe he would, but he’d rather just text you to come over.
K: Kink
So Robby is a switch. When he’s feeling more dominant, he loves to spank you with his hands, a paddle, or his karate belt. He gets off on the fact that you trust him so much to hold your pleasure and pain in his hands. He would never go too far, but he loves how wet you get after a light spanking. When Robby is more sub, he likes when you boss him around. Telling him how exactly to pleasure you, pulling his face further into your core. Making him get on his knees and watch as you pleasured yourself. He worships you.
L: Location
At first, a bed. But after you guys have sex on a beach at night one time, he realizes that he wants to try tons of different locations. Just the possibilities of how he can position you, someone catching you, or someone hearing how good he makes you feel, really gets him going. His favorite so far was in an empty stairwell at a fancy resort that Sam invited you both to.
M: Motivation
So like Hawk and Miguel, Robby is a teenage boy! He’s horny all day, every day. He loves seeing you in workout clothes, seeing other guys hit on you and then shrink away when they realize you’re his, teaching you karate, and watching you put your hair up. It reminds him of… certain things.
N: No
He would never ever let someone else join you guys. Male, female, or other, he hates the idea of someone putting their hands on you in that way, and knows you would feel the same about him. Robby thinks you guys have such a perfect chemistry going, so why would you want to ruin that with another person? It would just be awkward and clumsy, and Robby does NOT like to share.
O: Oral
So like I said earlier, he thinks porn is accurate when y’all first start having sex. He would go down on you for like 30 seconds, barely using any pressure or suction, and would then be confused as to why you weren’t finishing. He sat you down one day and talked to you about it, because he was scared you just weren’t attracted to him or something. When you told him that you needed more than what he was doing, he made you teach him right then and there. He spent a good hour and a half going down on you, making you tell him what was good and what wasn’t, learning how to actually give GOOD head, and now he’s pretty much an expert. He takes his time and takes cues from you. You were amazing at head right off the bat, and he’s such a simp for you when you’re between his legs.
P: Pace
It honestly varies depending on the day and what mood you guys are in. He’s a switch in all respects, so he can be slow and loving, or fast and rough, or a mix of the two. He also loves when you start on top and set the pace, and then he will flip you guys over when you get tired and finish you both off.
Q: Quickie
He likes a good quickie in those moments when you guys are out and get turned on all of a sudden. Robby likes to take you somewhere a little more private and get you both off, before resuming what you guys were doing and acting like nothing happened. You’ve seen him shake the hand of someone with the same hand that was buried in you 3 minutes before, acting like nothing was out of sorts at all.
R: Risk
He will try new things if you want to, but is honestly pretty content with how you guys fuck right now. His philosophy is “if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.” But he’s more than willing to try whatever you want to try. Robby can’t say no to his girl. Sometimes, you guys just sit there and watch porn together, and will see something that looks like fun, so you decide to try it.
S: Stamina
So I feel redundant for saying this on Miguel and Hawk’s too, but he’s a teenage boy! He can’t go for more than 12 minutes at first. He could go like 5 times in a row, but didn’t last very long. Now, he’s way better. He can last for a solid 30 to 40 minutes if he really wants to, but normally you’re satisfied before that and he can let himself finish.
T: Toy
Robby loves to try toys on you. When you first told him that you had a vibrator, he immediately asked if he could use it on you. He’s fascinated with how different toys do different things, and he loves studying the difference in your reactions depending on what he’s using. He doesn’t really like toys being used on him though. He thinks it feels weird and he'd rather have your mouth or hand.
U: Unfair
Robby can be a really bad tease if he’s in the right mood. He would hover his mouth over your pussy, letting you shake and cry before he touches you. He would finger you and bring you right up to the edge, before pulling his hand away and laughing as you almost sob. He likes knowing he has the power to make you writhe like that.
V: Volume
He’s pretty quiet, to be honest. You had to tell him specifically that you wanted him to be louder in the bedroom. Once you did that, he started to let loose a little bit more, but still isn’t super loud. He would rather listen to you scream his name ;)
W: Wild Card
He loves shower sex. Too many times have you guys both cum, only for him to carry you into the shower to clean off and eventually start round 2. The water, the soap, the nakedness, he’s a sucker for it. There’s no clean up involved, and he even gets a bathtub mat so you guys don’t slip and hurt yourselves.
X: X-Ray
I said it before and I’ll say it again! Size! Does! Not! Matter! The g-spot is 3 INCHES IN so if he’s hitting it right it’s fine!!! But Robby is probably a solid 6 inches.
Y: Yearning
Teenage boy! He could go at the drop of a hat. Robby wants you all the time, he just holds back until you want to as well. Which is also often, I mean look at him!
Z: Zzz
He doesn’t really like to fall asleep right after in case you need something. He makes sure he’s available to get you whatever you need: a snack, water, another blanket, a kiss. Robby also likes to hold you while you sleep, because it makes him feel like he’s doing his duty as your boyfriend and protecting you.
#cobra kai#robby keene#tanner buchanan#hawk#eli moskowitz#miguel diaz#karate kid#robby x reader#robby imagine#robby smut
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Hey so I just read the Laser Tag AU and maaaan, now I really want to play Splatoon smh aksksjjdjs
Anywayyy my point is: may I request more hcs but with the other boyos (Childe, Albedo, Bennett, Razor, Chongyun, Xingqiu and maybe Aether if you do him too xD)
Laser Tag ( genshin x reader )
Summary - Genshin characters playing laser tag with you their s/o.
Pairings - Reader x Childe/Bennett/Razor/Chongyun/Albedo/Scaramouche
Warnings - Mention of guns and shooting.
A/N - Added in Scaramouche- But I couldn’t think of anything for Xingqiu. I can surprisingly see the majority of the Genshin boys being good at wielding guns, even though they’d probably suck lol
Laser Tag
Childe
Childe is a beast.
Whether it’s in the terrain of his battlefield, or the streets of Liyue playing laser tag, Childe plays to win. He’s always been the competitive type, enjoying the thrill of battle, or in this case, laser tag.
He loves the game.
And of course, you just have to end up on the opposite team as him.
This game is the perfect setup for an enemies to lovers kind of vibe btw. With him shooting at your comrades and eliminating them from left to right, and you doing the same for his team. Very few people stand against him in this game, and his accuracy and sense of battle.
The two of you will spend the entirety of the game playing cat and mouse. Childe chasing after you while you simply escape his sights every time, taking down his teammates while you’re at it.
Childe isn’t as interested in winning, and once you prove to be worthy of a decent laser tag battle, he tries his best to force you to confront him.
Of course you on the other hand take his reckless behaviour to your advantage to turn the game in your favour and strike down his team. You know it’ll piss him off later when you win.
However, it Childe does manage to catch you…
The two of you will fight, that much is obvious. Dodging and attacking him, he will get very into it. Maybe a little too much, but you don’t give in, not until the very end.
Not until he’s on top of you, the two of you toppled over a bunch of hay that cushions your fall when he crashes into you. Not until he’s holding the plastic revolver against your temple, staring straight into your eyes with his signature smirk.
He might sneak a little kiss in there just to throw you off.
But in the end he will make sure he wins, or rather, he eliminates you. He doesn’t care if he doesn’t win the entirety of the game, taking you down was satisfactory enough, and he feels well accomplished and content after.
Would definitely rub it in your face.
If you brush it off as something you didn’t really try in, be prepared to be pinned against the wall and kissed until you admit that you were in fact, doing your best. And yes, he won fair and square.
Bennett
Omg this precious boy-
Bennett will try his hardest, stick by your side and shoot at any approaching target. Considering that the two of you are on the same team, he will promise to protect you.
With one problem.
No matter how well he aims, whether it is going to hit his target or not, the lazer disagrees. Rather, his terrible luck absolutely ruins it and somehow his lazer point ends up somewhere completely else.
“It changed its direction completely!”
Well… you never know, maybe it’s the gun that sends the lazers ray so far off, but considering it’s Bennett, you know it’s no coincidence.
So you end up protecting him.
Dragging him from place to place and shooting down your opponents, the two of you spend your time tripping over random large ass rocks ( with only Bennett’s terrible luck to blame ) and attacking opponents.
You make sure that Bennett is not shot, no matter what. And you give everyone else a terrible glare that basically screams that if they shoot him, they’ll face your wrath.
Nobody shoots Bennett.
By the end of the game, he’ll be grinning ear to ear. And even if he didn’t manage to eliminate anyone, he’ll boast about how his amazing dodging skills pulled him through the game. You’ll agree, lacing an arm around his shoulders and pulling him to the good Hunter to get a good meal.
Just to buy one though, the poor boy can’t cook for his life.
Razor
“Razor… very confused.”
The wolf boy has difficulty with the rules of the game, but the concept of pointing the gun at an opponent and shooting them with a lazer isn’t too hard to grasp.
You find out very quickly that Razor is actually pretty good with aim.
His hands don’t shake for one, and he is so adept to his surroundings that people struggle finding the source of their depleting health. Despite being overall confused at how to play, Razor easily becomes one of the main players taking opponents down.
As someone on his team, he makes sure to keep you by his side the entire time. He understands the elimination part, and he doesn’t want his lupical to get taken out, even if it’s a game.
He can be oddly affectionate at certain times, pushing your face against his chest as he takes out the remaining players in the field you both are in. He will carry you, and take no hesitation when pulling you out of the way, even if it’s a little too rough.
When the game ends, it might take a while to explain to the poor boy that your team won. And that it was a good thing.
Razor will begin to smile when he notices how content you are with it.
Chongyun
This man has the audacity to wield a gun while licking his ‘popsicle.’
Like goddamnit Chongyun, being good at shooting is already a flex, you don’t have to nibble at your popsicle while you’re at it.
You can’t really blame him though, it’s hot outside, and with the sun beaming down on the poor boy's head you know he can’t stand it. Especially with all the adrenaline and yells from opposing teams.
As someone on the same team as him, you take on the job of Chongyun’s personal popsicle restocker, and shooting anyone down once he gets tired. As good as the boy is at shooting, he sucks at keeping himself unknown to the other players.
So you take on the job to make sure they don’t shoot him down.
The two of you are a good team, and if it gets too hot, Chongyun might even let you have one of his popsicles. Of course you don’t have his talent of being able to shoot while having a popsicle in your mouth-
Your team will end up losing though, and even though Chongyun isn’t bothered, he will be slightly worried if you care. The two of you were obviously trying your best, and as long as you both had fun that’s all that matters to him.
But if it really bothers you that much…
He knows you feel comforted by physical contact, so he’ll hold your hand and offer a comforting smile. Tell you that you played well, and that he had fun.
That cheers you up right away.
Kiss him on the cheek please, even though he will flinch at the contact, his cheeks are flushed red and he won’t admit it. But he likes it.
Albedo
Why is it so easy to picture Albedo as a hot sexy stoic mafioso wielding a gun?
Anyways, Albedo is terribly good at wielding a gun. So good at that he only holds the plastic revolver with one hand, never missing a shot as he walks down the streets of Monstadt.
He knows the area well, so good luck trying to sneak up on him. The way his eyes so carelessly sweep the buildings, it hardly looks like he’s trying. Eliminating players with his lasers as he mindlessly strides past the fountain.
Of course, you’re against him.
Albedo isn’t really motivated to play, he’d rather be in his lab experimenting or recording down his discoveries. But he was dragged into this mess, he might as well play his part and support his team.
Albedo won’t hesitate to shoot at you and take you down.
As much as you may be important to you, he plays this game fair and square. He will take you down, or rather, he will try, because you get creative :)
He knows Monstadt well, but he can’t possibly keep his eye on all angles around him. So you’ll aim for his blind spots, throw yourself at him and tackle him to the ground. Simply eliminating him isnt satisfying enough, you need more.
So you turn this into a little game to fluster him.
Tackle him and pin him down, watch him scramble for the gun and then give him a peck on the lips. Watch as his grip loosens, and one of his hands instinctively come to nestle against your hair to pull you closer, and then you pull away.
Watching his idle confusement turn into a light blush on his cheeks is just too good, and how he grows even redder when you start laughing is even better.
Of course his team wins, not that he cares.
The minute the game ends he’s back in his office, conducting experiments. You can go interrupt him though, sneak into his office and press a kiss against his neck. He doesn’t often react or do much to it, but after your linger kiss at the game, he will pull you close and sit you on his lap. Have a proper make out session after you left him hanging with that peck earlier ;)
Scaramouche
This little man is ‘terrifying’.
It’s scary enough that whether you’re against him or on the same team as him, you keep your distance.
“Are you avoiding me Y/n?”
You play on the same team, and even if he’s your boyfriend, you know better than to stay too close when it comes to battle. He shows his cruelty, and you really weren’t looking forward to be put in the middle of that.
‘Unfortunately you didn’t have a choice-‘
Scaramouche will literally drag you, a hand looped around your waist to tug you to his side and take you along with him as he takes down opponents after opponents. He doesn’t ask for your praise, but you still give him it knowing he appreciates it. Mentally.
When he’s tired or bored, he will lean his head on your shoulder, wait there for a bit before jumping back up and shooting a random straggler on the sides. Heavens knows how the boy knows he was there, it’s like he has some sixth sense.
We don’t even want to get into his accuracy and precision, Scaramouche is born a mafioso.
At the end when your team wins, no surprise, give him a hug. Tell him he did well and even if he tries to push away, hold him tight. Even though he could easily pull your arms away if he wanted to, he’ll just pretend to give a little struggle and then give in to your warmth.
#genshin#genshin oneshot#genshin headcanons#genshin fluff#genshin childe#genshin Scaramouche#genshin razor#genshin bennett#genshin albedo#childe x reader#Scaramouche x reader#razor x reader#bennett x reader#albedo x reader#genshin chongyun#chongyun x reader#laser tag#cynshealthysfw
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NSFW Alphabet (Thomas)
a = aftercare (what they’re like after sex)
A puddle. Thomas would be a puddle after sex. All fucked out and not able to form a complete sentence. He’d just wanna cuddle up to you and stay in your arms forever. You’d have to reassure him that you'll be right back when you go get a cloth to clean him up. And he’d be on top of you, so fucking clingy, the rest of the night.
b = body part (their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)
His favorite part of his own body is his hands. He is so proud to be able to make you feel good with his long slender fingers. And he knows you have a thing for them so he makes sure to play with them and move them around when he catches you staring. You can’t blame him either because they are just so beautiful and you want them all over you all the time. His favorite body part of yours is your hips. His favorite thing is to grip on to them while you bounce up and down on his cock. Not guiding you or moving you, just letting you fuck yourself on him while using his hands on your hips as his only tether to reality while you fuck his brains out.
c = cum (anything to do with cum basically… i’m a disgusting person)
He would spill sooo much cum when you finally let him let go of all his pent up release. There would be thick white ropes dripping all over his chest and stomach after you jerk him off.
d = dirty secret (pretty self-explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
This boy’s got plenty of dirty secrets, that he’s a little bit ashamed of, that he’ll slowly reveal, knowing that you’d never judge him for anything he’s into or wants to try. One thing that took him a while to let himself indulge in with you is his desire to be totally at your mercy and completely submit to you. He wants to be tied up, blindfolded, and told he’s your pretty little bitch. But once he does tell you, it’s become his second nature to get on his knees and bow his head everytime you give him a certain look.
e = experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)
He doesn’t have very much experience but don't worry, he gets off on you teaching him. You’d have to show how to properly make someone feel good and guide his tentative hands where you want them and tell him exactly what you want him to do and call him a good boy when he does it right.
f = favourite position (this goes without saying.)
He loves it when you’re on top riding him, setting the pace and pinning him down to the bed. He likes to feel your weight on top of him, grounding him. Or, if he’s the one getting fucked, he likes you pounding into you in missionary so he can stare at your pretty face while he lays back and takes all the pleasure you’re willing to give him.
g = goofy (are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)
Most of the time, he’s too far gone to be cheeky but when you’re just getting started teasing or if you both are wanting something more vanilla for the night, he can be very cute and goofy, always messing around and making little jokes every once in a while.
h = hair (how well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)
He’s got cute little blond curls all over that you just can’t help but run your fingers through any chance you get.
i = intimacy (how are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)
Thomas is very intimate but still very submissive. He loves to have you closely pressed against him at all times to feel your love for him in your breaths against his skin and little kisses left on his face and neck and warm skin pressed against him.
j = jack off (masturbation headcanon)
He is constantly jacking off whenever he gets any alone time. Unless of course you punish him by not letting him touch himself because he's a good boy and he knows how to follow your commands even when he doesn’t want to. He knows that his domme knows best.
k = kink (one or more of their kinks)
Obviously he loves your d/s dynamic as well as bondage and pegging. But, something else he really enjoys is a little bit of pain. And not just as punishment, he likes the pain especially during sex. It drives him wild when you bite down hard on his neck or thighs, sometimes even drawing a little blood, or when you scratch your nails hard down his back, or when you fuck into him just a little too hard to overwhelm him a bit.
l = location (favourite places to do the do)
He’d be down to fuck just about anywhere and any time you want. He loves to be pushed into the nearest lockable room. Or, maybe even a little mild public play with you softly running your fingertips along the exposed skin of his thighs or his chest or his palm and sensitive inner wrist. Or with you planting wet kisses on his neck while he shudders in your embrace, secretly hoping someone sees.
m = motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)
Literally anything you do. Seeing you lick a drop of ice cream that fell onto your hand; he’s instantly hard. You bend over to pick something up and a little more of your skin is showing
or reach up and your shirt rides up; he’s instantly hard. You innocently brush past him while walking, he’s instantly hard. This boy is obsessed with you and his body definitely makes that clear for you even if he tries to hide it.
n = no (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)
He doesn’t like to take charge but you don’t seem to have a problem with that. You love to have him under your control.
o = oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)
Always such a good boy, he’ll stay down there for as long as you like him to. And, he absolutely thrives off of being crushed between your thighs and you sitting on his face, grinding yourself on his pretty mouth and nose and using him just to reach your own orgasm.
p = pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)
Fuck him hard and fast till his mind is turned to mush and he’ll be happy. In those rare times when he’s on top, bouncing up and down on your strap, he’ll be completely pliable in your hands guiding his hips on top of yours while his head rests on your chest letting out moans and whimpers and incoherent words that sound vaguely like your name.
q = quickie (their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)
Again, he’d be down ot fuck anywhere and any time and you know exactly how to make him cum so quickly. He’d be so blushy and subby afterwards too, all flustered and warm when someone tries to talk to him. He’d need you by his side the rest of the outing, clinging onto you all smiley and happy while everyone else gives you knowing looks.
r = risk (are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)
He’s definitely game to experiment whenever you want to try something new and puts all his trust in you no matter what. Not to mention, Thomas is such an exhibitionist and doing things in public is his favorite risk to take.
s = stamina (how many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)
Poor baby can never last very long when he has a pretty woman touching him. He’ll be ready to burst so quickly once you get your hands on him.
t = toy (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)
His favorite toy is of course your strap and the many ...ahem… attachments you have just for him. You prefer the big pink one that takes plenty of prep to fit inside him. He also loves your more painful toys too, as much as he begs and pleads for you to stop, he knows he has a safeword to use if he ever wants to and he secretly loves the punishment anyway.
u = unfair (how much they like to tease)
He would never last if he tried to tease you. You, on the other hand, love to tease him. Seeing him get all desperate and whiny is absolute heaven. You’d give him soft little touches and kisses all over his body except where he wants them most. He’d be so desperate you’d have to pin his hands down so he doesn’t touch himself in the meantime.
v = volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make)
Thomas is so fucking loud. Such a whiny little bitch. You’d have to make sure to stuff or cover his mouth when you’re in a place where you could get caught. When you’re in private though, he would nuzzle his face in your neck and his little whimpers would reverberate through you.
w = wild card (get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)
Thomas loves when you check in on him during a scene. He knows it’s just to make sure he’s still ok, but it just feels so intimate and sweet to him. You always take a second and lean down to brush the hair out of his face and wipe his stray tears away and place little kisses on his cheeks and nose and ask how he’s feeling or if he wants to continue. It always brings a smile to his face, even in the middle of a punishment.
x = x-ray (let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)
His cock is quite large. Very long but not super thick. It would feel so good inside you and would look so pretty all red and leaky, dripping all over his stomach. It would get all twitchy at the slightest touch or the feel of your breath over it.
y = yearning (how high is their sex drive?)
His sex drive is so high. This boy’s gotta get off every day, sometimes multiple times a day. Whenever you’re not fucking him, he’s getting himself off. He’s ready to go at just about any moment.
z = zzz (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
Aw, poor boy is so tired afterwards. After his last orgasm of the night, he’s already half asleep and by the time you’re done cleaning him up, he’s snoring sweetly in your arms.
#maneskin#maneskin smut#thomas raggi#thomas raggi smut#thomas raggi x reader#thomas raggi headcanon#thomas raggi headcanons#thomas raggi hc#maneskin x reader#maneskin fanfic#thomas raggi fanfic#måneskin#måneskin smut#måneskin fanfic#måneskin x reader#maneskin headcanon#maneskin headcanons#maneskin hc
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NSFW Alphabet w/Winwin
Warning: smutty!
Dedicated to: anime804
Aftercare:
I’m going to be honest, I see this man not doing much aftercare. If anything I think he will get cleaned up, maybe shower and go on with his day. Maybe if you guys had rough sex or it was just a very intimate moment he’ll spend the next half an hour running his hand through your hair. Little pecks on your temple as he helps clean you up. Ask if he went a little too hard or if everything was okay. Not saying he won’t care about it at all but just isn’t one who goes to great limits for aftercare.
Body Part:
He gives me fingers type person. He loves interlocking his fingers with yours. Loves playing with them and anytime he yearns for touch he goes straight for them. He might get irritated when you don’t get the hint about wanting to play with him (either holding them or playing with your rings/tattoos if you have any), so he’ll resort to snatching your hand and interlocking them. Not sparing you a glance as he goes on with his day like nothing.
Cum:
He doesn’t have a specific place he would like to climax usually he would let you decide. Lots of times though his loads are very intense when you suck him off. If not he’ll just release inside of you but with a condom on. I see him as someone who isn’t into the whole messy side and would find it annoying to have to clean the sheets because you two can’t seem to not cum on them.
Dirty Secret:
He secretly loves it when you’re on his lap. Usually he seems to be one who really isn’t to pda. Doesn’t really show much affection until he gets the sudden urge to hold you. You usually don’t sit on his lap but the one time you two were hanging out with the boys but no seats left you sat on his lap. When seeing his shocked face you went to get up and apologize but he only gripped your hips to keep you put. You never realized he was growing a hard on which was a shocker to him. He won’t tell you he likes you sitting there because every time you do he gets turned on and he thinks by you knowing you will think he’s a horny pervert and won’t ever sit on his lap again :(
Experience:
Completely honest, I think he wouldn’t be that experienced. Ever since he was a child he always did things. Always had a busy schedule and always determined to achieve great things. I don’t think he would’ve been one to really look for a relationship until he met you and you was just so damn charming to him he couldn’t continue he day without thinking about you. But when you two did have sex for the first time he pretty much knew everything. Just because he didn’t date a lot doesn’t mean he hasn’t done such naughty things.
Favorite Position:
I can see him loving reverse cowgirl and ballet dancer. He loves seeing you bounce on him, seeing himself get swallowed by your walls really gets him going. And ballet dancer well he really just likes the closeness. Seeing your face contort in pleasure because of him, determination and adoration written on his face as he swoons when hearing your moans only ever get louder.
Goofy:
He usually isn’t goofy but he gets very touchy tho. He’ll become this soft babie he’s tried not to show too much because of how much he gets coo’ed at by the others.
Hair:
I see him keeping it bare there but occasionally have a few strands on there.
Intimacy:
I see him as one who’s all about intimacy. Sees he’s kinda closed off he feels the need to reassure you just how much he loves you even if he doesn’t have. Very sensual, maybe gets rough and fast but before he climaxes he goes softer and slower wanting to climax with you. Cupping your face as he asks you if you’re close.
Jerk Off:
Yes. He would just not as much as the other boys. If he does it he absolutely makes sure he’s all alone, jerking off to pictures of you. He probably wouldn’t call you because he’s embarrassed and worried what you would think of him even though it’s completely normal to do so. So even after he’s done he wouldn’t be completely satisfied. You would know he jerked off because usually he takes you unexpectedly and starts touching you, his way to signal you he’s in the mood. That only ever happens when he jerks off few hours prior.
Kink:
Has a receiving oral fixation. He really loves it when you suck him off. Also anything that has to do with fingers he’s into it. Either finger fucking you, having you suck on his fingers as he hits it from the back, interlocking them while he’s climaxing literally anything he’s all for it.
Location:
I see him as one who would really like having sex in the living room or bathroom. He finds you very, very attractive having water drops run down your body as the room fogs up. At this point it’s either water or sweat but it doesn’t matter because he still loses it seeing you all watery as your begging for more. Living room, he finds it very comforting and relaxing. Like if you two were having lazy sex he would most likely want to do it there. Having you slowly bounce on his cock as the show on the tv was long forgotten. His pants barely down enough to free his cock. Even if he was mostly covered he would have you stripped to nothing. A hand grabbing your hair back as he held your hips, motioning for you to pick up the paste.
Motivation:
Stress. You two would probably do it when you guys really feel lovey dovey but when one of you two or both feel stressed you guys use that as momentum to fuck each other’s brains out, rough or slow it’s happening.
No:
Not into pegging. He’s low key a dom and even though you try to baby him to annoy tf out of him once you go too far he has you pinned on the cushions of the couch, jackhammering you not caring if one of the boys walk in any second. He’s also not one into threesomes or toys. Just overall a no.
Oral:
He’s not good at giving oral mainly because it’s all in his head. He thinks you won’t feel good so he won’t even try to have that discussion but you. Yeah he absolutely loves it when you suck him off dry. He loves seeing your beautiful eyes twinkle at him, you look so cute and innocent even though your mouth is full of his cock.
Pace:
He usually goes fast in the beginning. Mainly because he can’t wait no more, the foreplay already pushing him to the edge and really needs you. But as the time goes on he goes slower to feel every inch of you, also reminding you the love he has for you.
Quickies:
Not into quickies. You would probably would want to have one with him when you just really need him but he will not budge. Walking away with a smirk telling you to be patient and wait until you two get home. That little shit head.
Risk:
He’s not one for risks. He wants you all to himself and doesn’t like it when anyone even jokes about you about such vulgar ways. He even hates it when someone checks you out, so he definitely wouldn’t think about touching you or getting you turned on because the chances of someone seeing already ticks him off. Only he can see you hot and bothered.
Stamina:
He can go for a while. I mean have you seen his dancing and gymnastics? He can go on for like four rounds and you’re already delirious with just the first one. When you get like that he would probably taunt you about being weak and smirk when you push him back until he’s the one underneath. He likes seeing you think you’re dominating him only to pin you back down a second later.
Toys:
Absolutely not. He’s the type to remind you that whenever you need some attention just to come to him. He literally dislikes the idea of you using one to the point where he literally told you that he consents to somnophilia just in case you get horny on the middle of the night and need some dicking.
Unfair:
Literally is all about teasing. He loves seeing you on edge and as soon as your about to climax he pulls out with a shit eating grin. Either he’s teasing you with his fingers or dick. You probably won’t ever go a time you two have sex where he won’t give you some sort of teasing.
Volume:
Quieter the most. He wouldn’t be completely silent but he breathing and hitches are definitely audible. He really wants to hear you lose yourself so he’ll hold back any grunts just so that he won’t miss a single moan from you, but if he really missed you or was really sensitive by how stimulated you got him by sucking him off you will definitely hear a few whimpers leaving his mouth. Especially when he’s climaxing, he’ll tighten his grip on your hands and whimper in the crook of your neck concentrating in emptying every last drop.
Wildcard:
He loves hand holding. Either it’s out on the street or in bed fucking you balls deep he loves holding your hands. He interlocks his fingers and pins them over your head, in a way it gives him momentum to continue thrusting deeper and harder. One time he got so caught up in climaxing he forgot to hold your hands. Barely enough time to catch your breath he switches position and already lining himself again, kissing your lips and whispering to you to get ready for another round and this time he’ll do it right. Yeah that next round became three more rounds. Poor you.
X-ray:
I think he would be average. Now I don’t know how you perceive average but I know for a fact it’s not 8 inches or 3 inches neither. I definitely think he would be longer rather than thick.
Yearning:
He’ll usually need you at least three times every two weeks? I don’t think he would be one to need you every single day of the week especially since how busy he gets. But when he really misses you or just wants to do nothing but be with you he’ll take that time to plunge into you continuously.
Zzz:
Winwin would only ever fall asleep once everything is completely clean and tidy even if it’s a pain for him to do so. Even if it’s midnight and all he wants to do is shut his eyes to sleep his mind won’t let him and there he goes cleaning the room, bed, you, him and anything before resting down on the bed. But once his head hits to pillow he won’t take a no from you, you’re going to sleep with him because it’s late and he’s tired and can never fall asleep without having you in his arms.
#nct smut#nct winwin#nct x reader#nct sicheng#nct imagines#wayv smut#wayv imagines#wayv#wayv winwin#winwin#winwin imagines#sicheng imagines#sicheng smut#winwin smut
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Sunflower || Seokmin
seokmin x f!reader: soulmate au
w.c: 23.7k (its a long one get some popcorn lol)
warnings: angst, really really slow burn, suggestive themes (no nsfw sorry y’all)
note: I’M SO EXCITED TO FINALLY RELEASE THIS FIC, it has been released before but I rewrote it a little and finally finished it. PLEASE PLEASE LET ME KNOW YOUR THOUGHTS IT WOULD MEAN SO MUCH TO ME AND YES YOU DO NEED TO READ CHERRY FIRST IT WOULD MAKE A LOT MORE SENSE IF YOU DO.
cherry || masterlist
“Get up.” Seungkwan said opening the curtains in your room letting in the obnoxious rays of sunlight. You groaned turning over in your bed pulling the sheets over your head. A failed attempt to block the sunlight out. “I mean it get up.” He jumped on your bed, trapping you underneath him then tried to pry off the sheets from your body. Your iron-like grip holding them in place. You wiggled your body trying to wrestle him off. He scoffed placing his hands on your sides and jabbing them, an annoyed laugh falling out of your lips. He snickered grabbing onto your sheets and pulling them off your body.
“Get up!” He exclaimed letting you go, bringing your sheets along with him. He stood at the foot of your bed, hands on his hips, waiting. You whined, flaying your limbs up in the air, which only made him roll his eyes in annoyance. “It’s too early, let me sleep please.” You grumbled finally sitting up on your bed, crossing your legs and arms in front of you. You blinked rapidly trying to get used to the brightness of your once dark room.
“It’s almost two in the afternoon, I’m not letting you sleep anymore…so get up.” He commanded his hands leaving his hips and pointed an accusatory finger at you. “You’ve been doing this every weekend for the last five months and honestly I’ve had it.” He shook his head in disbelief and threw himself on your bed in despair. You rolled your eyes shoving him with your foot before laying down on your side, eyeing the unpleasant billboard outside your—well Seungkwan’s guest bedroom window. “Even if I get up, what's the point, I have nothing to do.” You sighed moving so you were now on your back, eyeing the ceiling fan as it turned with ferocity above your bed and attempted to count the times it went around in circles. Useless to say the least but helped calm you down.
“I talked to Vernon yesterday; he’s worried about you?” Seungkwan sat up poking your side again. The name that fell out his lips sent jabs of pain up your body and you tried your hardest to blink back the tears that had started to form at the sound of his name. “I’m fine.” You whispered turning over to face your best friend. His eyebrows furrowed as he searched your face carefully for any warning signs. “It’s okay not to be fine you know, it’s okay to admit it too.” He sighed wrapping an arm around your shoulder hugging you tightly.
“How is he?” You mumbled. The question had been lingering at the tip of your tongue since the day the two of you decided to finally part ways. Since the day you moved into Seungkwan’s guest bedroom and since the day Vernon told you about his back-packing trip around South East Asia. That night the two of you cried together on Seungkwan’s overly expensive couch, because your new realities, that didn’t involve one another as lovers, finally started to settle in.
When he walked out the front door, he had promised to come back under one condition. You knew it was eating him inside, but he held his head high and told you to try everything in your power to find the person that was meant to be your forever. He had found his, in fact his was the reason why the two of you were in this mess in the first place. Why the color you had gotten used to seeing for nearly five years had been stripped away from you.
“He’s good, he arrived in Thailand last night and yes he’s taking his vitamins and eating well.” Seungkwan stated he sat up bringing you along with him. “But he keeps asking about you and I’m tired of lying to him, so I’m taking you out today.” He smiled brightly, tugging a strand of hair behind your ear and placing a soft kiss against your forehead. “So, take a shower before I dump a bucket of water on you.”
“Where are you taking me?” You turned down the radio, your voice was hoarse from screaming out the lyrics to Dancing Queen with Seungkwan. A curious smile playing on your lips as you looked out your open window, the wind hitting your face making goosebumps rise onto your skin. Despite still not feeling like you could jump back and be the person you were five years ago or five months ago, you felt at ease.
“It’s a surprise.” Seungkwan stated in a matter of fact tone, finishing it off with a scoff. You rolled your eyes sitting back in your seat. The beginning melody of Toxic sounding through his car speakers made Seungkwan groan in protest. “Last time I let you pick the music.” He pointed out, turning on the turn signals.
“Shut up you love it.” You teased. “Now please tell me where we’re going, we’ve been driving for nearly three hours.” You whined, closing the window and bringing down the car visor. You opened the little mirror and cringed once you saw yourself. Your hair was sticking out in different places, your red lipstick was slightly smudged, and your mascara had started to run. If Vernon was next to you, he would’ve told you that you still looked like the most beautiful girl in the world. You grinned letting out a small sigh and shook your head. The feeling of nostalgia making its way underneath your skin whenever you thought of him. To your surprise you hadn’t bursted into tears yet and maybe that was an indication that you were finally starting to let yourself feel happiness once again.
“It’s been an hour and a half, you’re literally so dramatic.” Seungkwan said in disbelief as he slowed down the car. “Anyway, we’re here, but you have to put on the blindfold before we go anywhere.” He smiled, putting his car in park and shutting it off. He reached over the back seat and brought out a blindfold, cheekily showing it to you.
“Kwanie I know I’ve been a pain these last five months but I’m literally begging you to not kill me today.” You said as you finished up fixing your face as well as your unruly hair before closing the visor and turning to face him. He rolled his eyes shoving the blindfold into your hand. “I can’t stand you sometimes, just put the damn blindfold on.” He whined, tapping his fingers impatiently on his steering wheel. You saluted at him jokingly before putting it on. “Done, lead me to my death.”
“Let’s go drama queen.”
“You’re one to talk.” You mumbled opening his car door. Seungkwan grabbed your hands leading you out of the car, resting his hands on your shoulders. “I promise you’ll love it.” He said the smile prominent in his tone of voice as he started to walk you forward. You jumped putting one of your hands over his in panic, your stomach turning in anticipation. Your mind goes through numerous possibilities of what would be on the other side once you removed your blindfold. A part of you hoping it was Vernon, but you knew that wasn’t an option. He was out, doing something he had desperately wanted to do for years and no matter how much he cared for you. He wasn’t going to put his dreams to halt for you. The two of you had done it for far too long and now it was time to finally live for yourselves. It was something the two of you deserved.
“Alright we’re here.” Seungkwan stated as the two of you stopped walking. Your hands quickly went up to the blindfold and took it off quickly. A gasp falling out of your lips as you stared in awe at the black and white field of sunflowers. The heliotropic flowers swayed slowly in the wind as they reached up high towards the sunlight. Your stomach turning wishing you had never taken your color for granted.
“Kwanie, I-I love it.” You smiled turning to face the boy who was looking at you smugly. You hugged him tightly, burying your face into the crook of his neck finally letting the tears spill out. He nodded wrapping his arms around you tightly, slowly caressing your back as he let you cry. Something he had gotten used to since you had started living with him, and something he would never complain about. The pain you were going through, he could not understand no matter how hard he tried. He had never been in love before, his soulmate mark remained untouched, the words etched on his wrist haunting him for years, slowly making him lose hope. And that’s how he lived for a while until the night when you called him sobbing. The words coming out of your mouth he couldn’t make out, but he heard the pain laced in your voice. His heart broke as he knew what had happened.
Vernon had confided in him for nearly a year. At first, he didn’t agree with the way he was handling things, telling him that you should’ve been his first priority. But the more he thought about it the more he understood why he couldn’t. Vernon’s love for you was indescribable, he would’ve moved mountains and parted the red sea for you if he could. You were his light the reason he kept pushing even though at the end he knew what the outcome would be. The love the two of you had was pure art and Seungkwan could only hope to find something so perfect one day. Which is why he let you cry on him; let you curse out the world as he held you in his arms because even though he hadn’t found the person the universe had set him up with. He knew what it felt like to long for that person.
“We can cut some and take them home. Trust me the apartment needs a little bit of brightness.” He pulled away, his thumbs wiping the stray tears on your cheeks. You nodded turning around, watching the people you had overlooked run around happily. Some were by the little white kiosk that held bundles of sunflowers and strawberries and you assumed that’s where you would go to pay the fee. Others were taking pictures with the daisy like flowers, while others were cutting off the stems carefully to take home, fighting with the bees. The whole sight made you feel warm and at peace and though you had already cried. You felt like crying again only because the happiness that was bubbling up inside of you was overwhelming.
“Let’s go then and since you brought me here you will pay for them right.” You pouted batting your eyelashes up at him.
“What kind of friend would I be if I didn’t”
“The worst honestly.” You grabbed his hand leading him to the middle of the field. The skyrocketing flowers make you feel small as if you were an ant in the middle of a field of grass. “I wish I can see them in their truest form” You sighed taking one of the leaves in between your index finger and thumb. “But I can only remember what they would look like.” You nodded smiling sadly earning a flick on the forehead from Seungkwan. “Ow…what the hell Kwanie.”
“Stop getting all sad on me and smile please.” He said, bringing a pair of kitchen scissors from his back pocket. You cocked an eyebrow in curiosity, and you were about to ask him where the hell he had gotten them, until you noticed the miniscule flashes of color by his shoulder. You blinked rapidly, before rubbing your eyes forcefully not caring that you had smudged your mascara.
Seungkwan leaned up grabbing onto the flower stem, placing it in between the scissor blades and cutting it. A satisfied hum escaping his lungs, nodding in approval while he turned to you and brag. His smile fell once he noticed the look of distresses embedded onto your face. “What’s wrong, what happened?” He said dropping the flower along with the scissors and placing both hands on top of your shoulders. He shook you, your eyes turning wide while you looked around. The water pooling in your tear ducts and he tried to desperately grab your attention.
The broken flashes of yellow, coming in and out at a faster than before. Faster than the morning you had met Vernon. Your heart was at your throat and you pushed Seungkwan’s hands off your shoulders, ignoring his worried statements and pushed past him. You kept walking, your hands shaking at your sides as the flashes of color became more intense. Seungkwan followed you, taking long strides to keep up with you. “What’s happening…did something happen?” He asked his voice sounding with concern and once again you ignored him again, trying to find the reason why you were suddenly seeing color again. A part of you wondered if this was how Vernon had felt that night. If he felt lightheaded. If his body grew weak while his heart broke slowly into thousands of pieces while the flashes of color came in and out.
“Seokmin where are you going…what’s going on?” You heard a voice shout, your footsteps coming to a stop once your eyes found the ones of the person in front of you. The same look of distress you had on your face adorning his. You let out a sob seeing as the color poured in at a faster rate than before. The part of you that still loved Vernon breaking away slowly while you felt your heart start to beat out of time. Just like it had done that first time you met Vernon and you were introduced to a world of color. Seungkwan came up beside you, out of breath, his hand grabbing onto your arm, confusion written all over his features as he looked between you and the man standing a few feet away from the two of you.
“Min, you’re scaring me.” His friend said, waving a hand in front of his face. He didn’t budge, instead his eyes only got wider, and he took it upon himself to take a wary step forward. “D-Do you see i-it too?”
You nodded pushing the hand Seungkwan was using to hold you back off. “W-What’s your name?” You took a step forward, your body feeling as if it were on fire. Something you had never once experienced before.
“Seokmin, I-I thought I would never find you.” He confessed stopping until only a foot separated the two of you. His hands inside his jacket pockets itching to reach out to you. To embrace you, wipe away your tears, and tell you how beautiful you looked despite the mascara tracks staining your cheeks.
He never imagined that this day would come. Sure, he had fantasized about it since the day he learned what soulmate’s where. He had practiced numerous conversations inside his head, to be prepared. But he never once believed that he would be able to find, certainly not in a field of sunflowers on the hottest day of the year. And certainly not with you standing in front of him crying as if your heart was breaking instead of mending.
“C-Can I give you a hug?” You spoke rubbing the back of your hand against your cold cheek, a sob catching itself at the back of your throat. He nodded quickly, taking his hands out of his pockets and shaking them at his side. The two of you stared at each other in silence, eyes running all over the place. Your bodies daring to finally cross the line. In the end, despite your heart feeling as if it were to fall out of your ass. You crossed it, wrapping your delicate arms around his torso, the sob you had been holding in finally breaking out of its confinements.
Seokmin held you as if his life depended on it. His mind searching through the files of practice conversations he had over the years, trying to come up with something, anything to say to you right now.
With caution he started to run his hands down your back, trying to offer you comfort. His gaze landing on the man that had been chasing after you. To Seokmin his features were unreadable, but the tears that had started to fall out of his eyes spoke volumes and it scared him. He could only hope he wasn’t your significant other because the last thing Seokmin wanted to do was make you choose. If your heart didn’t belong to him then he’d live with the consequences because despite not knowing your name yet, he knew you deserved more than what the world had to offer.
“I-I’m sorry.” You pulled away; the residue of your mascara combined with your tears on his pale-yellow t-shirt. Your bottom lip trembles as the memories of your first meeting with Vernon came flooding back. “Everything is so fucked…I’m sorry you had to meet me like this.”
“Don’t be sorry, just because we met doesn’t mean we have to be together right away.” He nodded the soft pad of his thumbs lying against your soft cheeks. He studied your face closely, taking in everything as fast as he could. Afraid you would be taken away from him forever. He could tell something was bothering especially when you refused to look him in the eye. Only catching the subtle hint of sadness hiding behind your sparkling eyes. There was something you had to deal with, one that didn’t involve him, and he knew he had to put himself aside and you first.
“I’ve waited my whole life for you…I can wait a little longer.”
“Text him please.” Seungkwan pleaded falling on to your bed cuddled with your pillow. You stopped your typing and took off your glasses before looking down at him. His puppy dog eyes cause you to roll your eyes.
“I will once I’m done applying for this job.” You smiled sending him a playful wink. “No now, you always come up with an excuse to shut me up but this time it won’t work.” He sat up and hit you across your face lightly with your pillow, blocking your view. You whined feeling the weight of your laptop disappear from your lap and you knew this was a fight you weren’t going to win.
“Why does it matter, it’s not like I’ve been ignoring him, I respond to his good night and good morning texts every day.” You sat up and reached over to grab your laptop in which he was holding close and tightly to his chest. “Wow girlfriend of the year.” Seungkwan rolled his eyes, turning his body from your grabby hands.
“We’re not dating…please give me my laptop back.” You pulled at his arms as they got tighter around your precious device. You cursed falling back on your bed when you realized your attempts were going to be deemed as unsuccessful.
You slammed your hands down on your bed in frustration. Seungkwan sighed and set down your laptop on your bedside table before laying down next to you. He poked your cheek, grabbing your attention, your pouty gaze making his heart sink. “I’m scared, what if the same thing that happened with Vernon happens again.” You confessed hitting your palm against your forehead, silently punishing yourself for your stupidity.
“We don’t get anywhere in life letting our fear get in the way of things.” He grabbed your hand and placed it on his chest. “And you can’t keep comparing this potential relationship with the one you and Vernon had because you’ve been given a chance to start over and fall without a care in the world.” He said playing with your fingers gently. “So, ask him out, I know he’s been dying to see you again.”
“How do you know?” You scoffed pulling your hand from his and resting it on top of your stomach. You looked up at the ceiling, counting the small indents that appeared over years of overuse. Your mind racing back to the events that occurred at the middle of the sunflower field as well as what happened after. Which was nothing, you had told Seokmin that you needed time before jumping face first into a brand-new relationship. He had agreed, told you he’d wait for you a whole lifetime again if that’s what you needed, and it broke your heart. You could tell he was a little disappointed. It was written all over his face, despite the smile that adorned it and you couldn’t imagine how he was feeling now, especially with your lack of communication.
“Soonyoung told me.” Seungkwan flicked your forehead bringing out of your daze making you glare at him in the process. You were thankful for him and everything he had done for you throughout your devastating break up with Vernon but sometimes you wished he wouldn’t worry so much. “Wait…when did you get his number?” You sat up leaning your body over and poking his side. He convulsed pushing your hands away before sitting up and crossing his legs under him. “That day at the field while Seokmin paid for your flowers.” He pointed behind you to the vase that held your withered sunflowers. “Also, when are you going to get rid of them, they’re looking a little dead.”
You rolled your eyes and shoved him as hard as you could. He was right, the flowers had been dead for almost two months, but every time you looked at them, they reminded you of Seokmin and that thought alone made you happy. “Never, I’m going to be buried with them. Now get out of my room I need to finish applying for this job.” He nodded reaching over for your laptop and handed it to you before getting off from your bed.
“Fine, but please text him, Soonyoung and I made a bet and so far, he’s winning, and I really really don’t want to give him a cent.” He laughed walking out of your room, holding onto the door handle tightly.
“Seungkwan my love life is not a game.” You shouted, throwing your pillow at him. His eyes grew wide in panic and he ran out of your room, closing your door quickly. Causing your pillow to hit the door and fall to the floor. You shook your head and laid back on your bed, your laptop and job application long forgotten as you eyed your charging phone. Your hands itched to reach out and grab it and finally send the text you had written countless times, but never sent because of fear.
“Fuck it.” You reached over and pulled it off the charging cable, unlocking it and opening your message app. Seokmin’s good morning text sat unread at the top of the list. Your heart palpitated as you typed the message you had memorized and counted to ten before hitting send. You panicked throwing your phone across your bed and getting off it, the sweat forming on your hands as they shook. You ran out of your room, down the hallway and into the kitchen, your eyes landing on a smug looking Seungkwan as he turned a wine glass in his hand.
“I sent it.”
“Finally, I’m about to be fifty dollars richer.”
“How do I look?” You walked into the living for the umpteenth time that afternoon, this time you were adorning a sky-blue summer dress and white vans. “Every time you’ve asked me that I’ve told you the same thing, you look great now finish getting ready he’s going to be here in literally ten minutes.”
“I know but each outfit doesn’t feel right.” You threw your hands up and sat on the lounge chair putting your feet on top of the coffee table earning a look of disapproval from Seungkwan. “What if I wear the wrong outfit and the same thing as last time happens.” You pushed your hair back, lightly tugging at your roots.
“Sometimes I find it hard to believe that I’m the dramatic one in this friendship.” He leaned over and pushed your feet off the coffee table making you pout. “A bad outfit isn’t going to trigger what happened with Vernon, so calm down and touch up your make or hair. Whatever you need to do because now you have a solid five minutes before he gets here.” Seungkwan stood up from his seat and pulled you up from the lounge chair.
“See, I knew my outfit was bad. Now I have to go change again.” Seungkwan rolled his eyes while he pushed you back into your room. “It was a hypothetical, you look beautiful, but what does look bad is your hair so fix it because time is ticking and neither of us are getting any younger.” He guided you to your mirror waving his hands around your disheveled hair, scolding at yourself for having the terrible habit of pulling on it whenever you were anxious or frustrated.
“Fine, but can you keep on the lookout.” You spoke your eyes growing wide, the feeling of panic rushing through your veins when the doorbell sounded. “Looks like I don’t need to.” Seungkwan grabbed your brush and handed it to you before exiting your room, closing the door behind him. “Don’t change or I’ll come in here and drag you out in whatever terrible outfit you have on.” He scolded the sound of his feet getting softer as he neared the front of the apartment.
You sighed putting down your brush and smoothed out your hair as much as you could before tying in back in a loose half up and half down style. You slowly counted to ten putting on your earrings and the rings you could find on top of your messy dresser. You gave yourself one last look, whispering words of encouragement and walked out. Seungkwan and Seokmin’s animated voices getting louder as you got closer to the living room.
“Tell Hoshi I’m expecting his payment by tonight.” Seungkwan jokes. Seokmin threw his head back in laughter, making you roll your eyes.
“Sorry for keeping you waiting.” You cleared your throat, putting your cross-body bag on and gripping the leather strap tightly to keep your hands from shaking. Seokmin’s laughter died down as he turned to face you, a blush appearing on his cheeks as he took in your appearance. “It’s okay I didn’t wait long.” He shook his head smiling, he extended his free hand to you before quickly exchanging it with the one that held the flowers. “These are for you. I wasn’t sure if I should get you the daisies, the roses, or the lilies so I got you all three.” His nervous eyes left yours and looked around looking for another point of focus.
“I love them, thank you so much.” You took them from him, holding them close, a color of array of emotions bursting inside of you making you feel as if you were being reborn.
“Alright, you two get out of here, go have fun.” Seungkwan broke the silence taking your flowers from you. He gave you a pointed look as he shuffled the two of you out. “Have her home by midnight.” He opened the front door signaling the two of you out. “Will do, it was nice seeing you again Seungkwan.” Seokmin walked out leaving you behind to follow him through the compressed doorway.
“I’m terribly sorry about him.” You sent Seungkwan a glare, his tongue poking out at you in a teasing manner before shutting the door.
“He should meet the rest of my friends. I think they’d get along very well.”
Seokmin and you walked in silence, your hands brushing against one another daring to feel each other’s warmth. The sweet melodies of the night life filling in the pockets of the comfortable silence that was lingering in the air around you. A few sorry’s and excuse me’s were exchanged by oblivious passer-byes making the two of you exchange inconspicuous stares. Smiles etching from side to side, cheeks flushing dark crimson. Your hearts matching time unbeknownst to the outside world.
You tried to come up with anything to say though you ended up falling short. Even though the silence that was between the two of you was loud, blaring in forms of sirens. It wasn’t enough to overwhelm you, and for that you were thankful.
“We’re here.” Seokmin finally broke the silence, his shoulders settling to a calm composure. He grabbed the door handle and opened it, stepping aside giving you room to walk in.
The second you did you were hit with a colorful aroma of different tea blends, sweets and spices. The quirky designs and phrases decorating the different walls jumped out at you. And the calm soothing vibe warmed up your insides, calming your nerves.
Seokmin came up behind you finally crossing the line the two of you had unknowingly laid out. “I hope you don’t mind this is my favorite boba shop, I know it’s not ideal, but I was really drawing a blank when you texted me earlier.” Seokmin placed a hand on your shoulder, making your breath hitch as he stood behind you patiently waiting to be attended.
“It’s okay, I love it, plus we have other chances to go on more extravagant dates.” You exaggerated, giving him a warm smile. Seokmin swore he had been lifted up into heaven and dropped once he saw the light on your face.
“I’d love nothing more.” He gave your shoulder a squeeze before wrapping it around your front, gently pulling you close. “T-This okay?” He asked, his voice wavering at the end giving you the indication that he too was unfamiliar with this new ocean the two of you had plunged yourselves into. “Yes, this is perfect.” You answered a little too excited.
“Great, what do you want then?” Seokmin pointed to the menu behind the front counter. You looked up skimming through the various flavors and options silently before turning your head to face him. “Why don’t you choose me?”
“Are you sure, you’re putting a lot of trust in me. This decision could either make or break us.” He joked moving with you as the person in front stepped up to order. You smiled, shaking your head, bringing up a hand and intertwining it with the one Seokmin had around you.
“I guess you better choose wisely then.”
In the end Seokmin ended up ordering four different flavors of boba tea. All this favorite.
The cashier had given the two of you strange looks, probably wondering why the hell two people needed four drinks and it only made you laugh even harder. Seokmin had given you a pointed look before breaking into a smile, that you swore could light up every room. It made your heart skip a beat, fill you up with happiness that you hadn’t felt ever since that day at the park with Vernon. Making you realize that that was the last time you had felt that type of happiness.
“So why four?”
“I just ordered all my favorites, just in case my favorite favorite wasn’t your favorite.” Seokmin placed two of the drinks down onto the table, the two of you indiscreetly walked too. He waited for you to take your seat before taking his, at his respectful side of the tiny booth.
“So, which one is your favorite favorite?” You leaned your elbows forward toying with the plastic wrap of one of the straws.
“The mango green tea one.” He nodded pushing the drink in question towards you. You snickered, breaking the plastic wrap, lifting your hand to break the lid, stopping short when you noticed Seokmin’s hand covering the lid. “Before you try it, promise me this won’t be our first and last date.” He whispered his eyes all but pleading making your heart sink.
Sighing you brought your hand down, setting the straw aside. You put your hands over his, lifting it up to your lips, giving them a gentle kiss. You couldn’t blame him for asking. You had ignored him for almost three months, only answering his good morning and good night texts. He had every right to doubt you and your word. Without his knowledge you were putting back the pieces that were left behind after five years of living in a perfect illusion. Vernon still lived in the back of your mind, sometimes his memories still made your heart flutter and the what if’s still kept you up at night.
It was a conversation you needed to have with Seokmin, he didn’t deserve to be lied to or kept in the dark, especially because your heart wasn’t all that there yet. And because his was still innocent and pure, but for tonight you would bask in your dream world. Make promises you weren’t sure you could keep yet, because a part of you was starting to desperately cling onto him.
“Seokmin I promise.”
There was a first time for everything.
And for the first time in your life you had laughed so hard to the point you had milk tea coming out of your nose.
“Sorry.” Seokmin’s demeanor fell, stopping his over dramatic retelling of how he and his friends came to own a pottery studio. He panicked, a troubled expression replacing his soft gaze, scrambling to get a napkin out of the holder. You tried to regain your breathing as he handed you a handful of napkins, but your imagination took over and you doubled over in laughter, your forehead coming down onto the table. The images of Seokmin and his friends dressed as cats, dancing and singing along to the musical soundtrack in order to convince the previous owner to hand over the studio with the first six months of rent paid. Replaying in your mind like a movie reel.
“D-Don’t be t-that’s the funniest thing someone’s ever told me, and I’ve known Seungkwan for half of my adult life.” You panted and placed your hand on your chest, your stomach throbbing in blissful pain. Seokmin smiled, his cheeks blushing red. He reached over cradling your cheek gently, wiping your nose. The situation finally became clear and you flushed in embarrassment.
“You’re cute.” He whispered, his face lighting up before he gave your cheek an awkward kiss from across the table. “I think I’ve embarrassed myself here today more than I have my entire life.” You let out a small laugh, your hand coming up to your forehead and hitting it lightly with the palm of your hand.
“Like I said, you’re cute.” Seokmin removed your hand, locking his fingers with yours before sitting back in his seat. “Can I come sit over there?” You toyed with the straw of your drink, signaling to the empty space next to him with your head. Seokmin nodded, tugging on your hand lightly signaling that his impatience was close to take over. You removed your hand from his hold and stood up. He eyed you carefully as you smoothed out your dress, the light blue hue brought out the beauty of your smooth skin. It complimented the sparkle that lived behind your eyes making them look as if they held the entire universe behind them.
For the first time in his entire life, Seokmin finally understood the hype around the color blue.
He wrapped an arm around your shoulder after you sat down. You put your head on his shoulder, blushing when you felt his body stiffen. “Will you take me to the studio one day?” Your index finger coming up to play with the water ring your drinks had left behind on the table.
“If you do me a favor.” He swallowed trying his best to get his body to relax, but it felt as if it were on fire and no amount of water would be able to put it out. “I’m not dressing up as a cat and dancing for you, if that’s what you want.” You looked up as he started to cough, his eyes wide as he choked on air due to your statement. His mind wandered to places it shouldn’t ever wander and he wanted to slap himself mentally as well as physically. You sat up and patted his back, a knowing smile forming on your face and made a mental note to add what you had said to the list of embarrassing things that had happened today.
“N-No nothing like that, t-that wasn’t what I meant.”
“I know I was just messing with you.” You poked his nose and it only made him blush even harder, and it made your ego swell knowing you had such an effect on him. “What is it?”
“Please stop calling me Seokmin, it makes me feel like I’m in trouble with my mom.” He chuckled awkwardly, bringing up a hand to the back of his neck and rubbed it awkwardly. “What do I call you then?” You cocked your head to the side, bringing a hand up to smooth the collar of his button down shirt. It had been bothering you the entire night, but you didn’t have it in you to fix it. Afraid you were crossing a boundary either of you were ready to cross. But seeing as how the events were playing out you assumed it was alright.
“Call me DK.”
“Like the video game character?” Another fit of laughter threatening to break through the surface. Seokmin sighed, shaking his head in disbelief before pulling you close to his body. “Could be, but it’s short for Dokyeom.” He grabbed your hand from his chest and hooked his pinky with yours, swinging them in front of your bodies. You acknowledged, taking in your bottom lip in between your teeth. The butterflies that had been growing throughout the night in the pit of your stomach were having a field day. It was scary, you had only known him for almost three hours, and you were reading to risk it all once again.
“How about I call you baby instead?”
“Say it one more time?” Seokmin had you pressed against the outside wall of your apartment. Your hold on the doorknob faltered as you felt his lips hover over your own. “Baby,” You whispered, finally letting go of the doorknob and wrapping your arm around his neck.
“That’s my new favorite song.” He stated pressing your body closer to his, lifting you away from the wall. “Is that so…baby.” Seokmin groaned hiding his face in the crook of your neck. A tiny laugh falling out of your lips. You wrapped your hands around him, running your hands down his back gently.
“Please let me kiss you.”
Seokmin pleaded, lifting his head up to face you. A teasing smirk settling on your lips as you took the disparity behind his beautiful eyes. “Nope, you haven’t earned that privilege yet.” You pushed him away gently, stepping aside and finally entering the passcode to your front door.
“Ask me to be your girlfriend first.” You turned the doorknob, his arms snaking around your waist, his breath tickling the shell of your ear, the adrenaline you had felt throughout the night intimidating a breakthrough.
“Will you be my gir—.” You turned around quickly covering his mouth with your hand, the panic evident behind his glimmering eyes. “Not here, not now Seokmin.” You brought your hand down and he pulled away, taking his arms with him. “You’re right I’m sorry.” He hit his forehead gently with a closed fist, mumbling indiscreetly underneath his breath. For a second you thought you had ruined everything.
“I-I want you to be sure first, I don’t want to rush into anything.” You said as reassuringly as possible, the tiny fear demon in your mind finally coming out to play as it filled you with your doubts “I know, I’m sorry…sometimes I get too carried away, but I meant what I said the first time I met you.” He stuffed his hands inside his pockets, shrugging awkwardly. “I just hope that one day you can tell me what’s holding you back.”
“Seokmin it’s just that I—.”
“You don’t have to tell me today, but I promise I’ll listen to you when you’re ready.” He nodded closing the gap you had created and gave your forehead a gentle kiss. “Goodnight, sleep tight…baby.” He winked before stepping back and walking out of your line of sight leaving you breathless and overwhelmed, to the point where all you wanted to do was cry, because to say the least you were still scared and confused.
You let out a sigh and turned around punching in the passcode, impatiently waiting for the door to click open. You angrily shuffled inside your apartment, closing the door behind you. You placed your forehead against it, toeing off your shoes and pushing them aside. You took a deep breath and counted to ten before facing Seungkwan who was without a doubt going to be waiting for you to hear all about how your date went. You plastered on your best fake smile, going over points Seungkwan was sure to ask in your head and turned around, expecting to see him on the couch dramatically twirling a glass of Rosé in his hand.
And you wished that’s what you were met with, but like always the universe had its way of working and for a while it had been working against you. So of course, you were met with Seungkwan, a forgotten bottle of Rosé on the coffee table as he held onto Vernon while he sobbed into his arms.
“W-What’s wrong?”
The minute you laid eyes on Vernon you felt like your whole world collapsed into tiny shards of glass at your feet. You couldn’t breathe. It was as if your lungs were being crushed by two weights of pressure. You stood there in the middle of the living room, your words getting caught at the back of your throat, while Seungkwan ushered a sobbing Vernon out into the balcony of the small apartment. Leaving you behind to deal with your own curses. Seungkwan gave you one last sympathetic look almost as if he were telling you that he had everything under control. Yet, it didn’t help ease your newfound anxiousness as all you wanted to do was run outside and push Seungkwan away to comfort the boy you once loved. The same one a part of your soul still loved and held onto for dear life in fear that one day you would wake up and forget what it was like to ever be loved by him.
It was overwhelming. The feeling bubbled up inside of you as you retreated from the living room and made your way into your own room, looking for an escape. You were met with your four walls and memories that were buried deep into the archives of your mind started to play. Reminding you just how much you truly longed for Vernon. Reminding you just how much craved for his touch.
It was cruel. The tricks your mind was playing on you and for a moment you let it consume you. Deciding that this was it for you and you had a good but unfortunate run but it was too much for your poor body to handle.
Like that the seconds passed and then came the minutes and eventually four hours had gone by with you having no recollection of what you had done. How you changed out of your blue dress or when you had replied to Seokmin’s text with a simple: I’m fine, miss you already. Another lie you could add onto your belt. Your self hatred growing as time slowed down everything around you making it seem as if you were underwater.
Maybe one day you’ll finally be strong enough to face him and tell him the truth. Open your chest up to him and let him in on your soul crushing secret because he deserved to know the truth. But that time wasn’t now, at least not while you sat against the door frame of your bedroom door. Looking out into a dark lonely hallway hoping that the next person to come through wasn’t the one you wanted to hold.
You wanted to scream out into the void. Scream at the universe for being so cruel. Scream at Seokmin for finding you when you were still hurting. And you wanted to scream at Vernon for showing up in such a state that made you want to drop everything and give him the entire world again. But whenever you opened your mouth nothing but silence came out. Leaving you behind to deal with feelings you didn’t fully understand.
“He wants to see you.” Seungkwan’s voice brought you back down to Earth. You looked up, running your hands over your tear stained face, meeting his pained expression. Another thing you could add to the list of things you hated about yourself.
Seungkwan didn’t deserve to be caught in between two broken people and act as their mediator. He deserved a life where he wasn’t constantly picking up the pieces and breaking his neck to offer comfort to two selfish people that clearly did not deserve it. Every night you found yourself hoping he’d finally realized this. You hoped he’d leave you behind and continue the life he had put on pause for you and Vernon. You hoped he could find better friends that finally saw him as someone more than just a shoulder to cry. Your wishes falling onto deaf ears because he was still here wiping away your tears.
“He wants to talk to you.” He crouched down in front of you and gently flicked your forehead. “I don’t want to see him.” You whispered resting your cheek against your knees as you avoided his eyes and looked out into the dark hallway again. “I’m scared.” A tiny sob fell out of his lips as he sighed, taking a seat in front of you.
“Not as scared as he is right now.” Seungkwan placed a hand on top of your head and smoothed out the frizziness that had occurred over your neglect. “I helped him as much as I could now I’m passing the torch down on to you because I think you can offer him a lot more than what I can.”
“I can’t...a broken person can’t help another broken person. We tried it before and it ended in a mess.”
“Then don’t try to help him and just listen to him.”
“What if I say or do something wrong and I just make everything worse?.” You lifted up your head and met Seungkwan’s frustrated gaze. He ran his soft hands over your cheeks wiping away the tears that had silently started to decorate your face again. He placed a soft comforting kiss against your forehead before standing up and offered you his hands.
“I doubt you can make him feel even worse than he already does.”
You held the beer cans Seungkwan had laughably shoved in your arms close to your chest. Your eyes stung from the salty tears that had been pouring out. It frustrated you because it seemed like the only thing you could do nowadays was cry. It made you feel weak and worthless.
There was a little voice in the back of your head that was scolding you. Telling you to suck it up because whatever was going on with Vernon had nothing to do with you or the beautiful tragic past the two of you shared. You had realized this hours ago, yet you still cried as if you were the one at fault or the one feeling his pain with him.
That was something the universe didn’t take into account when she had rudely decided to split the two of you up. No matter what happened or where the two of you ended up in life you’d always be connected by a single string. Your life lines belonged to one another, the pain he felt you felt it to.
Maybe that was the aftermath of this whole soulmate fiasco or maybe it was something you made up to give yourself comfort. But at least he didn’t have to endure it all alone.
You took a deep breath before sliding open the balcony door. The humidity of the summer air hitting you square in the face causing the feeling of suffocation to return. Yet somehow it still sent shivers up your spin as if it were winter. A side effect of being in the presence of your past lover.
His back was turned to you and you would’ve thought he hadn’t noticed you if it weren’t for the awkward shift of his legs and the tension in the air. He looked down at the nightlife that had started to crowd the streets for their daily rituals. A soft hot breeze blew dancing with a few strands of his hair, while the annoying billboard that covered the sky view from your bedroom window casted a faint spotlight on him.
“You wanted to see me?” You cleared your throat and closed the balcony door behind you. Vernon turned around, his swollen eyes and tear stained face matched yours. “Can I give you a hug?” He choked out, his lips trembling slightly. You nodded and placed the beer cans down onto the small patio table before closing the gap between the two of you. A broken sob fell out of his lips when your arms finally found their way around his frame. You held him tightly, breathing in his familiar scent, feeling the goosebumps rise along your arms as you rubbed soothing circles down his back. Your own eyes brimming with tears as you felt him shake in your arms and it broke you.
“What happened?” You broke the silence with the question that had been lingering in your mind for hours. Vernon raised his head and you reached over to gently wipe away his tears with the sleeves of your hoodie. He pulled away from you once you retreated your hands and walked over to the balcony railing, turning his back to you. You were left standing there unsure if you should follow him or keep your feet planted in the spot a few feet away from him.
“I think the world has a personal vendetta against me.” He shrugged, breaking the suffocating silence. You grabbed the beer cans and walked over and stood next to him. “That’s a pretty big claim don’t you think?” You handed him a can. His fingertips slightly brushing over yours, sending a jolt of sparkling shivers up your spine.
“The person I saw myself growing old with turned out to not be the person the universe had picked out for me and the person the universe did pick out for me died last night. I’d say it’s the right claim to make.” He laughed bitterly opening the beer can and taking a generous drink from it.
“L-Last night, Vernon you’re not shitting me are you? I just had lunch with them yesterday.” You shook your head bringing a hand up to your face and slapping your cheeks gently. Your head didn’t want to settle down and your heart was starting to speed up. It was impossible you had seen them not even twenty four hours ago. You had laughed over a funny video on their phone and bonded over a book two of you had been consequently reading.
“You two were friends?” Vernon exclaimed his voice containing hints of underlying shock and confusion. “I guess we were.” You shrugged and opened up your beer can. “I didn’t mean to befriend them at first. I reached out to them after you left cause I knew you were in contact with them and since Kwanie wasn’t telling me anything about you at first. I thought that if I got close to them, they would eventually bring you up and I’d finally know how you were.” You finished bringing the can up to your lips and took a few sips. The bitter taste hitting your tongue making you groan in annoyance.
“Did I come up?” He glanced over at you, a sneaky smirk forming on his lips at your confusion. “Only when they found a way to insert an apology over the events of that night. Even after all the times I had told them that it was fine. That I was fine.”
“Are you fine?”
“Shouldn’t I be the one asking you that?” You grinned, bumping your hips with his making him stumble. “Everyone already has. I wanted to spice things up for once.” He smiled up at the night sky. You watched making it obvious that you were. The stars sparkled behind his tired eyes reminding you of all the wishes you had made whenever you looked into them. Some of them came true others didn’t and it had torn you apart until one day it didn’t.
“I don’t matter right now Vernon.” You took a sip from your beer cringing at the taste once again. You had to remind yourself that you weren’t drinking for the pleasure, but for the strength you needed to be next to him right now.
Vernon blew out a raspberry and took the last sip of his beer before turning to face you. He grabbed your hand and brought it up to his lips kissing each of your knuckles before placing it on his cheek. He closed his eyes and leaned into your touch basking in the feeling of having you next to him again. You took a deep breath as the hand holding his beer can circled around your waist and brought you close. He opened his eyes once he felt your chest against his, soft eyes running over your features carefully taking in everything that had stayed the same but had also subtly changed. Vernon freed your hand letting his fingers run up your arm until they reached your chin.
His touch ignited your insides. The world falling away over the horizon leaving two broken souls behind reveling in each other's warmth once again.
“You will always matter to me.”
You tried everything to keep the tension between the two of you at bay. To keep your focus on his words rather than the way his lips moved as he explained his soulmate’s unfortunate death.
It had been a hit and run and it filled you up with anger. Anger that you had never once had the privilege of experiencing until the words escaped Vernon’s mouth. “I just feel guilty. I never gave them a chance. I ran away when I realized things wouldn’t go back to normal and now I’m sure I’m being punished for it.” Vernon sighed and brought his fourth beer up to his lips, taking a decent sip from it before gazing over at you. His eyes shined as if they held a thousand tiny little universes and you found it difficult to look away.
The space between the two of you disappeared and you found yourselves shifting closer to one another as if pulled by two magnets. Your legs were resting on top of his thighs and his warm hand wrapped around your calves, rubbing soothing circles against your skin. The light of the billboard casted a warm glow onto the two of you making the setting a little more intimate than intended. But neither of you found yourselves complaining.
“Vernon, don’t say that...they understood our situation and they wanted to wait until you were ready.” You reached over and pushed a fallen strand of his hair back, your heart beating out time and you felt as if the entire world had stopped. It was a known fact that you two were reaching into uncharted territory but neither of you wanted to hit the brakes just yet. Maybe it was the unfinished business between the two of you or the lingering feelings that would always remain. But you had decided to blame it on your vulnerability, the stupid billboard light and the beers shared between the two of you.
Whatever it was, you didn’t want it to stop.
“I think I really could’ve loved them.” Vernon let out a sigh and sat back, his hand squeezing your calf. “Maybe not in the way I loved you, but in a way that could’ve been special between the two of us. I talked to them almost every day and each time I found my heart jumping out of my chest. It was as if I was a kid in high school again scared to comfort their crush.” He sighed and looked up at the sky, silently counting the tiny little dots of light that could’ve been stars or planets from universes across.
You watched him carefully, finally taking in how much he had changed from the last time you saw him. He had grown out a little bit of stubble, slight bags stood underneath his eyes and his cheeks were red from the sun. A clear indication that he had not once thought of putting on sunscreen and you wondered if he did it to hear your voice nagging him in the back of his mind. Or if he finally felt free to do whatever he wanted. Either way he was different, not just physically but there was something about him you couldn’t pinpoint. And it frustrated you because before you would have been able to read him as if he were your favorite book. Now you had lost a few pages along the way and you didn’t know where to turn too anymore.
“So what happens now?” You whispered tilting your head to the side, the droplets of your forgotten beer running down your fingers. He sighed and looked over at you before reaching over and massaging the creases between your brows. He always scolded you about it, told you your face was a piece of art and didn’t need any extra tension. And although you had never believed him before and brushed it off as a joke, the way he was looking at you as if you were his entire world made you believe him.
“Your guess is as good as mine. I can still see the world in all its glory, the colors haven’t faded and I don’t think they will.” He brought his hand down your face and cradled your cheek gently. “I think they were it for me. I just wish we had more time.” He nodded before running his index finger across your cheek and down the bridge of your nose stopping just above your cupid’s bow. “But can I tell you a secret.” His eyes filled with hope as the words spilled out of his mouth.
“As long as you don’t make me keep it.”
“You will always be my favorite color.”
It was wrong.
The way Vernon’s lips danced against the skin of your neck as he pushed you up against your bedroom door, was wrong. He wasn’t yours anymore and you weren’t his but you felt the flame burn deep inside you. One that had gone out long before the universe took the man in front of you away. You were feeling it again and letting it consume your entire being. You didn’t want it to stop.
“We have to be quiet.” You moaned out, fingers playing with the hem of your old graphic tee that you were sure had belonged to him. From what you could remember it had smelled like him once and somewhere along the creases he had left his mark.
“Seems a bit challenging for you.” He teased and pulled away, his lips leaving your skin making you feel empty. He smirked and circled his arms around your waist letting them travel down your back and landing on your ass before giving it a squeeze making you yelp in surprise. He chuckled and pulled you close, “Thought you said we needed to be quiet?” He quirked an eyebrow before leaning down letting his lips hover above yours.
“F-Fuck...just kiss me already.” You whimpered and wrapped your arms around his neck and brought his head closer, but he restrained from closing the gap and you let out a desperate whine. “I miss you angel, I miss you so much I don’t think I can hold myself back anymore.” He confessed his words making their way into your heart and locking themselves in. The little voice in the back of your head yelling at you to stop but you pushed it aside, desperate to feel his warmth again.
“Then don’t”
Vernon’s lips crashed onto yours barely letting the words leave your mouth. You could taste the bitter alcohol on his breath, a reminder that neither of you where in the right mind to be doing this. Yet the fire between the two of you grew. You found yourself ignored the flaring alarms going off in your head again as you kissed him back with the same hunger he was kissing you.
He tapped the side of your hip and mumbled an almost incoherent jump and you obeyed, wrapping your legs around his waist while he held you as close as he could. He pushed the two of you away from the door, his lips desperately dancing against yours. The crude sounds the two of you were making bounced off your bedroom walls and you were sure the two of you were being anything but quiet.
Vernon pulled away and carried you over to your desk removing everything he could before setting you down on top of you. You pushed yourself against him letting the back of your hand brush against the collar of his shirt. He smirked and gave it a tiny peck before finally bringing your shirt over your head and throwing it somewhere behind him.
“Still as beautiful as I remember.” He hummed your face heated up as he attacked your neck again. This time making sure he was leaving his mark on you one last time. You threw your head back moaning his name lost in the pleasure he was giving you when your peripherals caught sight of something that made your heart stop.
The faded yellow of the withered sunflower’s Seokmin had given you were now staring at you in disapproval. You felt your breathing regain speed and it wasn’t because of the way Vernon’s lips traveled down the navel of your breasts. No, it was because reality finally decided to hit you and you were once again planted back down onto Earth.
“Vernon stop.” You choked out. The flame inside of you dying and quickly replacing itself with the poison fear brought with it. Vernon stopped his movements and pulled away as fast as he could. You saw the concern wash over his soft features as his eyes ran all over your face. “What happened, did I do something wrong?” His words raced out of his lungs at the speed of light and he cradled your face in his hands. The tears soon started up again as Seokmin’s laugh rang in your ears. His broken face staring back at you when you had denied him earlier that evening made you feel as if you were the worst human being on planet Earth.
“W-We can’t do this Vernon.” You shook your head trying to avoid his gaze and placed a hand against his chest before pushing him away. Vernon sighed, letting his eyes land on your flower face and somehow he had finally understood what happened. “I know, I’m sorry...I should’ve stopped the minute I kissed you.” His shoulders fell letting the guilt wash over him like a tidal wave. His confession left you broken but he didn’t try to fight you or himself. Instead he created the space you need to breathe and looked around your room for your shirt.
“It’s not your fault. I shouldn’t have egged you on.” You pushed yourself off your desk not caring about the things that had fallen onto the floor and grabbed your shirt from Vernon’s hand. He grinned watching you slip it on before sitting down at the edge of your bed, his forearms resting on his knees.
“We’ve got to be the most fucked up people in this cruel world.” He laughed letting himself fall back onto your bed. You shook your head before sitting down next to him. “Maybe we did something to piss someone off in our past lives and now we’re paying for it.” You shrugged, poking his side lightly making him fold over from the jab that ran through his body.
“Whatever it was...it must’ve been bad.” Vernon mumbled and looked up at your ceiling. The silence raining down over the two of you like a protective shield. Your heart was starting to return to its normal state but the guilt and confusion consumed you greatly. You knew you wouldn’t sleep tonight. You wanted to ask Vernon to stay and keep you company and you almost did as you watched him shut his eyes, peace washing over his body and you wondered what it was like to be held by this new version of him. But you quickly pushed those thoughts aside deciding that there were boundaries you needed to start setting up for both of your sakes.
After all, neither of you belonged to each other anymore.
“Where are you going to sleep?” You finally broke the silence after sitting in it for what felt like hours. He opened his eyes slowly blinking back the sleep as he sat up. “Probably the couch.” He stood up running a hand through his hair before turning to face you. His eyes bore into yours gently and you knew there was something he wanted to tell you but whatever it was it looked like you had to live without knowing because what came out of his mouth was not what you had expected. “I’ll see you in the morning.” He nodded before walking over to your door.
“Goodnight Hansol.” You whispered making him stop dead in his tracks, his birth name falling foreign onto his untrained ears. There was a time in his life where he loved the way your voice danced whenever you said it, but now he realized that he didn’t anymore and that was the hardest pill he would ever have to swallow. So he gave you the gift of a small nod before exiting your room, leaving you behind in your cold bedroom. Your soul felt as if it were in a pool of muddy water and all you wanted to do was call Seokmin, apologize and tell him everything.
“Can you please talk to me?”
You trailed behind Seungkwan as he pushed the shopping cart into the frozen aisle of the grocery store.
A week had passed since you accidentally found yourself pinned against your bedroom door with Vernon. A week had passed since the two of you decided to finally start setting boundaries for one another after Seungkwan had scolded the two of you like teenagers on the couch. Since then he had been giving the two of you the silent treatment. A punishment until you and Vernon came to terms with how wrong your actions had been, or so that’s what Seungkwan claimed.
You knew you had been in the wrong, you knew you should’ve never let it get as far as it did. The disgusting guilt consumed you whenever you saw Vernon wander around the apartment like he owned the place. It tugged on your heartstrings whenever Seungkwan glared at you for standing an inch too close to your ex lover. It feasted upon your flesh whenever you stayed up until the morning dew fogged up your windows, talking to Seokmin. Nothing between the two of you was official yet, and that had been your doing because you couldn’t seem to find a way to confess to him without hurting him and yourself in the process.
“Nope, not until you tell Dokyeom what happened.” Seungkwan huffed, stopping the shopping cart in front of the frozen pizza freezer. It was your weekly movie night. It had surprised you when Seungkwan brought it up in passing over breakfast that morning because you had assumed with how things were going, and now that Vernon had decided to stay, he would’ve cancelled it.
“I will, I promise I will. I-I just don’t know how or when.” You walked in front of Seungkwan and opened the freezer door reaching in to grab the triple cheese stuffed crust frozen pizza. “I don’t want to hurt him.” You sighed as you placed down the large box inside of the cart that was filled with an assortment of junk food.
“That’s the problem BooBoo the fool, you hurt him the second you let Vernon inside your heart again.” He held the freezer door open and reached inside grabbing the frozen hawaiian pizza, making you scrunch your face in disgust. In all the years you had known Seungkwan his taste in pizza was the only flaw he had, though he claimed it was an acquired taste that only the elite understood.
“What am I supposed to do then Kwanie, Vernon will always hold a piece of my heart whether I want him to or not. I spent half a decade loving him and shit like that can’t be forgotten in a few months.” You took liberty in closing the freezer door after Seungkwan had finished grabbing everything else you needed for the movie night. “I feel like you’re being really unfair right now.”
“I’m not saying you should forget about Vernon, the guys living with us for crying out loud. And he is my best friend, but I’m trying to get you and him to realize that your story together is over and has been for a while. It sucks that the two of you got ripped away from one another, but you know how I always tell you that everything happens for a reason?” Seungkwan glanced over at you while you nodded along to what he was saying, “Then there’s a reason why the two of you were never meant to be.”
“And what reason could that be?”
“Let him go and you’ll find out.”
Whoever reserved Wednesday nights as movie nights, deserves the guillotine.
Though as much as you hated that they were planted in the smack middle of the week. You will never complain about it out loud, because you knew it had been your idea to hold them every Wednesday after a very heated argument with Seungkwan that you surprisingly had won. But if you dared to ever mutter out a complaint, he would make sure to never let you hear the end of it.
“One movie, I have to wake up early for my job interview tomorrow.” You pleaded looking over at the clock that hung over the t.v, that also didn’t work. You had promised you would change the batteries to it months ago but forgotten. You suspected that the only reason Seungkwan hadn’t taken matters into his own hands was because he wanted it to serve as an annoying reminder for you.
“Wait, you have a job interview?” Vernon exclaimed in surprise as he walked out of the kitchen in a hurry with the pizza box burning his hands. “Yeah, at the school a few blocks away from here.” You shrugged, throwing the pillows you were carrying in your hands onto the makeshift fort the three of you had tried to create. Keyword tired, it was falling apart the more you stared at it.
“You’re going to be a teacher again?” Vernon’s face lit up as he set down the pizza box onto the coffee table that had been decorated to the T with all the junk food you and Seungkwan brought home. Seungkwan cleared his throat as he came into the living room again, his arms overflowing with all the blankets he could find. He threw them down landing on top of the pillows you had once held in your hands, before crossing his arms in front of him, closely eyeing the two of you.
You rolled your eyes and turned your attention to Vernon who had taken it upon himself to start digging into the hawaiian pizza, “I hope so, a job position opened up last week so I decided to send in my resume and they called me on Monday to schedule an interview.”
“That’s great--ow, bubs, I’m really happy for you.” Vernon said as he fanned his mouth after stupidly biting into the fresh out of the oven pizza. You nodded and turned to face Seungkwan who was glaring at Vernon while he ate his precious fit for royalty pizza.
“Let’s hope I get it, nothing is set in stone yet.”
“They’d be fools to not hire you. You’re amazing. I know they’d fall for you the second they hear how passionate you are about teaching.” Vernon assured as he blew onto his pizza, stopping to look at you for a split second, “I know I did.” He shrugged before tearing his eyes away from yours and taking another bite out of his pizza, making an O shape with his mouth to avoid getting burned again.
It was strange. If Vernon would have told those exact words last week out on the balcony, you would’ve melted at his feet. You would’ve never stopped him from going any further and you would’ve probably tried to erase Seokmin from your mind. But hearing those words escape Vernon’s pink lips now that he stood in your living room arguing with Seungkwan about hawaiian pizza. His words did nothing for you. They didn’t make your heart race, they didn’t make your palms sweat and they didn’t make your ears flare up in heat.
The only thing his words did was etch their way into your heart and fill you up with nostalgia, but not the kind that had you longing for his touch. The kind that made you happy that you had once been able to call him yours once. Maybe it was sign or step one of you finally being able to move on.
“Thanks Soli, I’ll keep that in mind.”
You were pacing in front of the main office for what seemed like hours, trying to calm your nerves down. You figured that moving around was better than sitting still and letting your thoughts race through your head, while you were at stand still. Though pacing wasn’t working either because your interview was scheduled to be at nine and it was nearing ten, and the dirty looks from the receptionist wasn’t helping your case either.
“Jeonghan I don’t know what you want me to do? I already sat down with the two of them and told them violence is never the answer.” The door to the administration office finally opened making the receptionist sigh out a sign of relief. As you scrambled to collect the stuff you had placed down on the waiting chairs behind you, you made a mental note to apologize to her before you left today.
“Seokmin don’t worry about it...I’ll contact the parents and see where we can go from there.” You felt the air catch itself in your throat as you slowly turned around to meet a very worried looking Seokmin. He hadn’t noticed you yet and you hoped he wouldn’t because the last thing you needed was to have him running through your mind during your interview. So, you stood there looking like a deer caught in the headlight while he continued chatting with the other man next to him. His voice filled with concern and it made your heart swell knowing how much he seemed to care about the issue at hand.
“Oh you must be here for the new teacher position right?” An unfamiliar voice sounded making you jump out of your days and thank god it did because you were about to let your mind wander to what having kids with Seokmin would be like. And that was something you weren’t ready to imagine, especially not when he looked good enough to eat in his work clothes.
“U-Um yeah I’m--”
“Sweetheart, what are you doing here?” Seokmin finally noticed you. The excitement in his voice made the heat flare up along your face and you tightened your hold on your things pressing them against your chest, as your eyes traveled from his sparkling ones to the very shocked ones of the receptionist and finally landing on the man next to him who was out of this world confused. “Sweetheart? You two know each other?” He questioned signaling to the space between you and Seokmin with his index finger.
“Hannie this is the girl I’ve been telling you guys about.”
“Oh, the one you never shut up about.” He nodded, sending you a knowing wink. Was there anything worse than your possible future boss finding out you were in cahoots with one of his teacher’s before actually getting the job? Probably not because you were currently wishing for the ground to swallow you up. But it made you feel a little better knowing Seokmin was wishing the same thing, judging from the redness of his cheeks.
“I-I’m here to get interviewed for the new teacher position.” You nodded reassuring yourself more than anything. “I didn’t know you were a teacher, I thought you owned a pottery studio?” You looked at Seokmin who was cutely rubbing the back of his neck as he giggled underneath his breath. Your heart convulsing and now you weren’t so sure you wanted the job if it meant having your heart erupting out of your chest twenty four seven, seven days a week.
“I do, but Minghao runs it during the week with our other friend Mingyu. Soonyoung and I are in charge of it during the weekends.” He smiled and took a step forward ignoring the looks Jeonghan and the receptionist were giving one another, and somehow you knew this whole situation was going to be the hot topic of the week in the teacher’s lounge. “I’m really glad you’re here.” He finally closed the distance before pulling you in for a hug, “I’ll make sure to put in a good word for you.” He whispered before kissing your temple lightly and pulling away.
“Alright, lovebird you have a science class to teach and I have an interview to conduct.” Jeonghan voiced shooing Seokmin with his hands making your sweet lover boy laugh.
“Good luck baby.” Seokmin threw you a kiss before exiting the main office, the door closing in behind him. Leaving you alone and deserted with your smirking future boss and nosey receptionist. Your nerves had subsided to almost nothing but now your mind was consumed with Seokmin and you weren’t sure if you were going to survive your interview without letting your mind wander to the loving future that was creeping up on you.
Jeonghan huffed and turned on his heels signaling for you to follow him, “I hope you know that just because my best friend and one of my teachers is head over heels for you, doesn’t mean you get special treatment. I still need to make sure you’re right for the job, and let me tell you sweetheart you have competition.”
“I didn’t expect you to go easy on me anyway.”
Jeonghan closed the file he had in front of him before lacing his fingers together on top of them and leaned forward, eyeing you closely. “Can I give you some advice?” Jeonghan titled his head, his glasses that didn’t have lenses sliding off the bridge of his nose. The entire time he was interviewing you had tried your best to not laugh at his ridiculous antics. But seeing as this was your first and most likely last time you were going to see him, you figured that you would keep it to yourself for now.
“U-Um yeah...of course.” You rushed out a little too eagerly, your nerves once again getting the best of you. They had been in control for the twenty minutes Jeonghan had been interviewing you, but now as he stared you down, you felt your nerves coming crashing down like an ocean wave.
“I’m hesitant on hiring you, your track record is spotless and you’re probably the best candidate for the job--” He sighed and ran a bony hand through his dark hair while leaning back in his chair. You knew your rejection was coming but you didn’t expect it to be so soon. You were hoping to at least make it home cry about how awful your interview had gone before burying yourself in a pint of cookie dough ice cream while Seungkwan lectured you all whilst simultaneously trying to keep your hopes up.
“--But I don’t know how I feel about two of my teacher’s dating, especially if you’re going to have the evidence on full display.” He raised his pen and pointed to the side of your neck where you knew Vernon’s evidence was still on you, a reminder of the sin you had committed a week ago. Your eyes grew wide as you panicked and slapped your hand on the side of your neck. A smirk appeared on Jeonghan’s face as he smugly crossed his arms in front of him. The realization hit you a little too late because now it became clear that he was only testing you and sadly you had failed.
“I’m sorry, um...I--I.” You shook your head, your hand falling down slowly and landing on your lap. There was nothing you could say in order to fix your mistake, you could only hope that Jeonghan wasn’t one of those people who loved to gossip because the last thing you wanted was to ruin a relationship that hadn’t gotten the chance to blossom. “Can you please not tell Seokmin.” A soft whisper fell from your lips, aware that you were throwing yourself under the bus, but what else could you do? You had already lost the job, you didn’t want to lose Seokmin as well, at least not yet.
“Ah, so it’s not from Dokyeom...bummer I was ready to tease him about it all week..” He shrugged and leaned his elbows on his desk along with his body. “So you’re two timing him? And here I was starting to believe that our precious Dokyeom had finally found love.” He tsked, shaking his head, “I must say I’m incredibly disappointed, I thought I was the cruel one.”
“No, no, no, it’s not like that, it’s just--,” Your hands had started to shake on your lap, underneath Jeonghan’s amused stare. “--it’s complicated, more than you can imagine.” The confession stumbled out and you heard him let out a dry laugh.
“I have no doubt in my mind that whatever the situation is, is not an easy one but I suggest figuring your shit out before roping in one of my friends. Dokyeom has been through enough and I have no idea how he still keeps that smile of his on his face knowing the shit he’s been through.”
“I know, I’m sorry, I know you don’t believe me but I have been trying.”
“You’re right I don’t but I’m also not the one that needs to believe you.” He shrugged standing up from his chair and rounded the corner of his desk, stopping in front of you and leaning against it. “This isn’t a conversation you and I need to have, and all I ask of you is to have it with the person that’s meant to hear your words.”
“You’re right, I’m sorry,” you nodded and smoothed down the wrinkles of your dress. “Thank you for the interview.”
“Cheer up princess.” He laughed and extended his hand in front of him for you to take. You looked up at him hesitantly before grabbing his hand and letting him pull you up. “You got the job.” He smiled before letting go of your hand and walking towards his office door leaving you behind as you tried to figure out if you heard him right. “Now come on it’s almost lunchtime, I’m starving and we have a ton of paperwork to sign.”
“Wait you’re not shitting me are you?”
“If I was, I would’ve told you to leave the second you answered my first question, now let’s go.” He signaled you over while opening the door. You scrambled tripping over the leg of the chair you had just been sitting in making him roll his eyes. Now you understood why he had called himself the cruel one because Yoon Jeonghan was quite literally the reincarnation of the devil.
“Excuse my language but you’re an asshole.”
“I’ve been called worse sweetheart.”
“Are we celebrating?” Seungkwan’s voice excitedly boomed through the speaker of your phone as you climbed up the steps of your apartment building. After you had gone through the mountain of paper’s that Jeonghan and the school district had you signing. You had declined his offer on having lunch with him and all the other teachers, giving him the poor excuse of already having lunch plans with your best friend. You could tell he wanted to say something but instead he bid you farewell before telling you to come over on Friday after school for a tour of the school, as well as to show you where your classroom was going to be. “Please tell me we’re celebrating, I already sent Hansol to buy the cake, the streamers, balloons, champagne and the pizza.”
“I get my classroom on Friday and I start next Wednesday.” You voiced while punching in the code to enter your building, the buzzer sounded indicating that you could enter the lobby. You heard screaming from the other side of the phone followed by shushing noises. “Focus on your job Kwanie.”
“But this is more exciting,” He whined, making you shake your head in disbelief. If Seungkwan wasn’t the best entertainment lawyer at his firm you were sure he would’ve been fired ages ago. “How’d the interview go, I’m guessing good because now you’re employed.”
“It went awful, trust me I was expecting to still be unemployed.” You pressed the button to the elevator, watching as the numbers counted down slowly. The anticipation of getting into your bed again was killing you as the numbers got closer to the ground floor. “Then how do you have a job now?” Seungkwan questioned before letting out a gasp at the same time the elevator dinged announcing it’s rival. “You didn’t...you know, do inappropriate things to get the job did you?”
“I’m offended that you’ve known me for years and yet still think so lowly of me.” You entered the elevator and pressed the number to your floor, leaning against the elevator railings and watched as the doors closed in front of you. “Of course I didn’t.”
“I don’t know after what happened last week, I feel like I don’t know you anymore.”
“Jeonghan lectured me already about this after my interview. I don’t need you hanging it over my head again.”
“Wait bubs, who’s Jeonghan.”
“Oh, my boss.” The elevator stopped and slowly opened its doors. You pushed yourself off the wall and walked out, bringing your purse in front of you to fish out the keys to your apartment. “I think you two would get along, you're both equally as cruel.”
“I don’t know if that’s a compliment or an insult, but I don’t have time to be offended because now I’m just confused. How does he know?”
“Surprise! Seokmin is my co-worker and I ran into him before my interview--”
“He’s your coworker and your future baby daddy. This is wild bubs I would not like to have a love story like yours… no offense.”
“Whatever Kwanie, the point is the demon that is my ex boyfriend left a hickey on me last week and it still hasn’t gone away. So my boss saw, lectured me about it and somehow I ended up with the job.” You sighed, dropping your key back into your purse and pushed your already opened front door with the toe of your shoe. Vernon always had a habit of never closing the door completely and it had terrified you a few times, especially when word got around that there was a serial robber on the loose in the area the two of you used to live in.
“Maybe you heard wrong, are you sure you got the job?” Seungkwan questioned and you could almost picture the raise of his eye brow along with his scold. “This doesn’t sound like you got the job to me, maybe you should call them just to make sure.”
“I got it, I already signed all the paperwork.” You shook your head toeing off your shoes, noticing that Vernon’s vans were missing, which meant he still wasn’t home and you had maybe a few minutes of peace to yourself.
“This all sounds a little too suspicious now, but congratulations I’m proud of you...I guess.”
“Thanks you’re the best, I’ll call you later I think I’m going to shower so I can contemplate all my life choices.” You said holding your phone between your ear and shoulder as you placed your stuff down on top of the kitchen counter. “Also pizza two days in a row are you okay?”
“I’m fine, can’t say the same thing about you though.” He scoffed. “I’m going now I hope your shower makes you realize how stupid you have been lately.” He spoke before hanging up without letting you get a word in. Sighing you brought the phone down from your ear setting it down next to you. Your thoughts were jumbled and jumping around from one thing to another. You wished you weren’t so scared of confessing something to someone, especially if that someone was starting to become the reason why you kept waking up and getting out of bed every passing day. But you also knew you were hurting him more letting the days pass and keeping him in the dark. Needless to say your life had become a mess in the span of a few months and some days you found yourself wondering how you could return it.
Jeonghan told me…
Your phone buzzed making you jump. You grabbed it quickly watching as Seokmin’s contact name stared at you brightly, along with his message making your heart race. You cursed at yourself for trusting that the snake would keep your secret sealed behind his thin lips. And maybe he had hired you out of spite but whatever it was you were already typing your overdue apology in hopes you could at least salvage the tiny piece of Seokmin’s heart that he had selfishly given to you.
Congratulations baby, dinner on Friday to celebrate?
Your fingers stopped as you let out an embarrassing sigh of relief, silently apologizing to Jeonghan. Quickly you erased the few sentences you had managed to write out before typing out a reply. You weren’t sure what spirit had possessed you but, who's ever it was, gave you the confidence you needed to hit send, because you knew what you were about to do was going to possibly ruin whatever relationship you had with Seokmin or save it. But you were tired of walking on eggshells not only around him but also around Vernon. He needed to know and you needed to finally let go.
I’ll cook, I want you to meet some people.
Vernon walked into the apartment with everything Seungkwan had sent him out to get before leaving for work that morning. The bags he had been carrying for blocks were cutting the circulation in his arms, his fingers burning sweetly from the plastic. How they hadn’t fallen dead on the sidewalk a couple of blocks back was a mystery to him, and in truth the pain didn’t bother him until now, while he toe-d off his shoes as fast as possible. He felt his arms start to give up so he dropped them, like he usually did and let out an enormous sigh of relief. The circulation coming back into his arms at a rapid rate.
He stretched his hands out mumbling incoherently. Coming to a stop when he saw your distressed form leaning against the fake marble of the kitchen counter. Phone clutched tightly in your palm, breaking the circulation, much like the plastic bags had done to him. Before, he could stop myself, he ran over to you. Stumbling over his shoes. The groceries and the tingling feeling on his fingers, from the blood returning to them, long forgotten. All he could think about was you and what was going through your mind.
Without hesitation he wrapped his arms around your waist, burying his face into your neck as he felt your body grow stiff against his. The pang hitting him like a wave of unwanted air giving his heart a run for its money. “Are you okay?” He whispered bringing you close, hoping his comfort would somehow bring you at ease. He was never really good at comfort. He had learned that early on in your relationship, but he always tried as best as he could. Affection had been his major weak point, but now that he had lost you it had become his strongest suit.
“No Vernon, I’m not.” You swallowed the lump of anger that had been lodged into the back of your throat before gripping his arms with your hands and prying them off. Vernon was taken back, the void returning to his chest and you tried your best to shoulder past him. “You almost costed me my job today.” His arms fell at their sides, your words catching him off guard.
No matter how many arguments the two of you had had during your past relationship, he had never heard you use this before. The venom became permanent, interweaving itself with the strings of your vocal chords and for the first time he had realized that he had finally lost you.
“Me?” He questioned, standing dumbfounded. A shaking finger coming to view pointing to his chest. “What do you mean I almost ruined your chances at you getting a job. I’ve only been home and at the grocery store?”
Vernon ran a wary hand through his dark looks, the confusion written all over his face when you glanced at him and pushed past him a little too forcefully. He tried to recall anything he could’ve done for you to look at him in such an unpleasant way, but his mind came to a halt stopping in front of a white wall. All he could remember was trying his best to stay away from you and failing.
Every night he sat in front of your bedroom door while you talked on the phone for hours. He missed the sound of your laugh. He knew it was never going to be directed towards him anymore, but he would never get tired of it. At least it was a distraction, as unpleasant as it may have been at times. His life was ruined and his search for cheap apartments big enough for himself was starting to become a bust.
He wasn’t stupid. As much as you and Seungkwan had tried to mask your distaste for his return. He knew he wasn’t welcomed and he was made more aware of it now that he could feel your anger caging him in.
“This Vernon!” You yelled as he came out of his daze. His eyes widened when he saw you unbutton the first few buttons of your blouse, the nude of your bra peeking out making him swallow thickly. “This is why I was almost not hired today.” You pointed at the faded hickeys he had left behind. A year ago he would’ve smirked while making a slick comment before attacking you. The giggle would fall out of your lips as he led you to the couch while he deepened the lovebites he had previously made.
Now he stayed put, watching the angry tears fall from your eyes and instead of feeling sorry. He was now starting to shed his calm composure letting it get replaced by a year’s worth of anger. He let it consume him, because he had had enough.
It wasn’t fair.
It wasn’t fair that you and Seungkwan were faulting him for something that hadn’t been entirely his fault.
“Did you get undressed in order to get the job? Were you really that desperate. Did he not like the fact that you were whoring yourself around when he saw another man’s mark on you?” He spat out, barely processing what he had said. His fist balling up at his sides while yours did the same thing. “I knew you were capable of things but this is a new low that I should’ve seen coming.”
Vernon had never once said anything hurtful to you, he had given silent treatments, left the house in fits of rage; but never anything hurtful. You were caught by surprise, your heart beating out of your chest angrily and tears flowed at a rapid rate. This was a new side of him and you supposed he was also seeing a new side of you. It made you wonder if you had truly known one another as well as you once prided yourself in.
You forcefully threw down your stuff onto the coffee and took fast, long strides over to him. “Fuck you Vernon, I wish I had never met you.” You forced out jabbing your index finger into his chest as hard as you could, hoping you’d be able to hurt him even further like he had done to you.
He stayed, not budging, looking down at you with an overwhelming amount of disgust. “You’ve ruined my life.” The whisper escaped your lungs before you could stop it, but the damage had already been done. The two of you had been stripped off of everything, left with nothing. Two once perfect colorful arrays of canvases now painted white. What more did you have to lose?
“And you’ve ruined mine.” He emphasized, making sure each word, each syllable was laced with the same amount of poison he was being consumed with. He wanted them to take a piece of your soul. The same way yours did with his.
It was the final blow he needed to deliver to finally be able to walk out of your life for good. To finally forget the way your presence had his heart doing somersaults. To finally realize he was and had never been yours to begin with.
Vernon shook his head in disbelief blinking back the angry tears. He grabbed your wrist and slowly peeled your fingers away from his shirt he hadn’t noticed you were clinging onto. His body was shaking just like yours. Emotions he was now experiencing for the first time consuming him slowly. He pushed you away gently, a stark contrast from the hurtful words he had said earlier and quickly made his way to the front door. Hastily putting on his shoes, mumbling underneath his breath. He ignored the groceries again, and tripped over every miscellaneous item that was decorating the floor as he opened the front door.
Déjà vu hit you like a tsunami, shaking arms wrapped around your torso, sobs falling out of your mouth as you watched him leave just like you had many times before. This time he didn’t love you enough to want to come back.
When the world had once still revolved around you and Vernon, your fights would never last as long as this one had. It had lasted two days and six hours, but who’s counting?
You were avoiding one another like the plague not wanting to admit fault.
“Are you spaced out again?” Seokmin’s voice sounded through the speaker of your phone. You don’t know when the nightly facetime calls became routine, but they were the only thing you look forward to now. Especially after the nasty argument with Vernon two days and six hours ago.
“Sorry Min.” You shake your head and turn to the side bringing your blanket up to your chin. “What were you saying again?”
“I’m sorry we had to move dinner to tomorrow night, I forgot I had to babysit my nephew.” He pouted at the camera before turning his attention back to washing the dishes he had used for dinner.
Since the two of you hadn’t been able to physically have dinner together to celebrate, you figured that having dinner with him through facetime was better than nothing. To keep him company of course and not because he filled the void you had been feeling for days on end.
The entire time you were holed up in your room and witnessed how gentle he was when it came to his nephew. It made the butterflies in your stomach dance to the beat of their own drums. Once again you found yourself pushing the thought of Seokmin and children away. It was too soon.
“Don’t apologize, I enjoyed watching you struggle with Minjae. Personally, baby, I’m a fan of when he calls you Min Min.” Seokmin laughed. His smile reached both ends of his face as he turned the faucet off. He dried his hands on a kitchen towel before grabbing his phone. “When I went to put him to bed he said you were pretty...and I mean he’s not wrong you’re gorgeous sweetheart.” He winked making the apples of your cheeks heat up with the light pink of baby flower petals.You watched as he shut off the lights and walked out of his kitchen, trudging silently through the hallway before reaching his room.
“Since we’re alone now,” he started shutting the door to his room, “You want to tell me what’s been bothering you for the last few days?” He finished. The small complaint falling out of your lips as you hid underneath your blanket. It was amazing how in such a short amount of time Seokmin had been able to read you like a book from start to finish.
It had taken Vernon a full year to be able to decipher the hidden meaning behind your words.
Vernon...you hated how much he was consuming your thoughts. Even when Seokmin was around. It felt like a curse with no cure. “Just got into a small argument with an old friend.”
“Have you tried talking to them?” Seokmin walked around before placing his phone down and unbuttoning the first few buttons of his shirt. “You won’t be able to fix anything if the two of you haven’t talked.”
“I can’t Seokmin, I said some hurtful things to him and honestly I shouldn’t have said them. I was angry over a situation that wasn’t entirely his fault.” You sighed, removing the blanket from your head and flopping down on your back. “If he didn’t hate me before he does now.”
“I don’t know what happened with your friend, but I don’t think he hates you. Just try and talk to him and clear the air.” He nodded before laying down on his bed, grabbing the pillow and hugging it. “It doesn’t hurt to at least try.”
You smiled and nodded. He looked breathtaking underneath the dim light of his room, “If you’re going to be right all the time, I think I might want a refund...again”
“Don’t say that baby...I’ll let you be right on odd days.”
Saturday night came faster than you had anticipated and somehow you had managed to burn spaghetti.
Your day had been awful and you were hoping that when nightfall came everything would’ve gotten better. Your wish had fallen on to deaf ears because you had burned spaghetti, Vernon was acting like a grade A asshole, and Seungkwan was ignoring you.
When Seokmin had arrived. On time. He had found you scrambling in the kitchen trying to remake your famous (easy) pasta dish. Seungkwan and Vernon were arguing over the correct way to set a table...it was chaos.
Neither of them were correct but you didn’t care enough to correct them. They weren’t talking to you either way.
When you had managed to finally finish dinner. With the help of Seokmin. He had insisted after he saw how stressed out you looked, the four of you sat in complete silence. Seokmin at your side, holding your hand underneath the table, Vernon eyeing him down like he was his prey and Seungkwan mindlessly scrolled through his phone. The clinking of utensils and your heavy breathing was the only thing that was heard.
You wanted to die.
“Um...so I know Seungkwan, but I don’t know you. I’m Seokmin.” He nodded in Vernon’s direction before taking a bite of his pasta. You watched as Seungkwan locked his phone and put it down. His eyes traveled between the two male figures before they settled on yours and you watched as he slightly shook his head.
“I know who you are, you’re the one that she stays up talking to.” He signaled in your direction before setting down his fork and leaning into his chair, crossing his arms in front of him. “I’m Hansol but you can call me Vernon.”
“Cool...so Vernon, how do you know each other?” Seokmin let go of your hand. The warmth and ease you had felt disappearing as you saw the two of them eye each other. As far as you could tell Vernon wanted to eat Seokmin alive and Seokmin was simply driven by his curiosity. “Did you just move in?”
Vernon laughed bitterly before pushing his half eaten plate away from him. “You haven’t told him?” He questioned. The amused evil glint adorning his soft eyes. A look you had never once seen him give anyone and now that it was directed towards you. You were terrified.
“Hansol don’t!” Seungkwan warned. You felt Seokmin’s body stiffen next to you as he looked over at you, an eyebrow raised. “So we’re just going to sit here and pretend we’re one big happy family when we’re all miserable because of her.” Vernon spat out digging his burning gaze into yours. You jumped and looked over at Seokmin who had retreated into himself. His eyes were burning holes into the pasta in front of him.
“Min I-I can ex-”
“What does he mean, what is he talking about?” Seokmin interrupted and pushed his plate away from him. Your appetite was gone and you could only assume everyone else was feeling the same way.
“Tell him. Why don’t you tell him how you were moaning my name a few days ago just like you had done for the past five years.”
You panicked, your body shaking in intervals of five and you tried to look for anything to say but your lies had finally caught up to you. The only thing you could do was drown and keep drowning, just like you had been doing before Seokmin came into your life and pulled you out of the water. Now you were pushed into it again and this time you were positive no one was going to risk themselves to save you.“Seokmin w-wait please.” You threw your napkin on the table and stood up, the corners landing into the pasta sauce as you turned to face Seokmin. You extended your arm to grab his hand, only for him to pull it back, ”You were just toying with me.” The legs of the chair scraping against the hardwood floor made you jump. Your body going into survival mode. “I saw the marks on you but I just assumed I had accidentally gotten carried away.”
“You fucked him too, wo-”
“Vernon, shut up for once please.” You yelled. Your world came crashing down again just like it had on that winter night; in front of the infamous coffeeshop. Both times had been Vernon’s fault.
“I-I can’t be here.” Seokmin whispered, running a bony hand through his perfectly styled hair, causing it to messily stick out in random places. He sighed before pushing his char in forcefully as he gathered the few things he had brought with. He stepped on the soles of his shoes, not caring about how uncomfortable he felt. The only thing that was running through his mind was how he needed to get out and far away from you as possible.
“Why can’t you guys let me handle things at my own pace. I was gonna tell him this is why I invited him but I didn’t want him to find out like this.” You shouted, making Seungkwan and Vernon to look at you as if you were a deer and they were the headlights. You shook your head and stood up running past them and the kitchen towards the door that Seokmin had left wide open. Your vision had gone blurry and you opted out at putting on your shoes. It would be a waste of time and you needed to get to him before he left. You were tired of not fighting for what you wanted and you wanted Seokmin enough that it hurt.
“M-Min please wait! Let me explain.” Seokmin stopped as he was halfway down the first flight of stairs.
“I understood. I told you I would wait for you because I knew something had happened to you. Yet I never pushed you to tell me. I started to fall for you, only to find out that you didn’t care that you never cared. T-That there was someone else.”
“I-It’s not like that.” You ran down the flights of stairs, ignoring the small pebbles digging into the skin of your feet. “H-Hansol was my soulmate, bu-”
“Was?”
“Yes Seokmin he was my soulmate, please just give me a chance to explain everything.” You grabbed his hand and brought it up to your heart that was going a mile a minute. “We aren’t together and haven’t been together for a year...i-it’s just complicated.” You pleaded.
“But you slept with him right after our date I’m guessing?”
“I-I...a...Seokmin please just let me explain. I didn’t sleep with him. When you left he was here and we talked and then one thing led to another but I stopped him because of you. Because I had the most amazing ti-”
“Is that supposed to make me feel better because it doesn’t.” He rolled his eyes and pulled his hand back, stuffing both of them into the pockets of his coat. Goosebumps rose against your skin. You blamed the cool wind of the beginning autumn months but you were very well aware that it was because of the coldness behind Seokmin’s comforting eyes. “Do you still love him?”
“M-Min I-I...um. I-”
“God, I really don’t want to look at you right now, I w-wished I h-had never met you.” He whispered.
Your knees gave up at the realization of his confession and you fell down onto the concrete step of the stairs. You were numbly looking at his worn out shoes as he stood there wordlessly, broken sounds leaving his perfect lips. A breeze blew and you shivered, “I-I’m sorry.” You whispered before he turned around and started down the rest of the flights of stairs leaving you behind.
When Vernon left, you were heartbroken.
When Seokmin left, you wanted to die.
It’s unclear how you made it back into your apartment on the couch under a plethora of blankets, shivering, teeth clattering against one another. You weren’t sure how long you had been out in the cold waiting, hoping for Seokmin to come back and take you into his arms. To hold your shivering body close to his warm one, while whispering the three words you longed to hear most.
I forgive you.
That hadn’t been the case though. You sat out there waiting on the concrete steps as the bitter cold overtook your body, until you couldn’t feel your bones anymore. In the midst of your unwavering head, you had lost track of time. And now you are sitting on your couch, listening to soft shuffles of rushed feets and hushed arguments. Tears frozen onto the apples of your cheeks, staring at the blank wall that sat behind the television set.
“Hey,” Seungkwan’s voice sounded distant as he tried grabbing your attention, shaking you gently.
The inside of your head was a mess, the files of all your memories going up in flames. You wanted out of your head, to look at Seungkwan’s face morphed with concern. You wanted to cry into his arms just like you had done many times before but you were done. You had let other people deal with your problems for you instead of facing them head on. So, you ignored him and his soft voice to stare at the blank wall. At least the wall wouldn’t be used by you.
“I ran you a bath, come on.” He placed his palm on your back rubbing it up and down in a soothing manner. You cringed, shrugging his touch away and wrapped the blankets around yourself tighter, retrieving into yourself. “You’re going to freeze to dea-”
“I deserve it.” You mumbled. A tear trickled down your cheek and you looked down at your shivering hands. He was right, the color from your skin had been drained due to the bone chilling cold from the start of the winter months. But you liked wallowing in the numbness, it served as a reminder of how much you truly fucked up.
“You don’t, now come on before you force me to carry you, you know how weak my back has been lately and you would be doing me a great disservice if I have to carry you all the way to the bathroom.” He said pointedly and tugged on your hands as he stood up taking you along with him. The blankets fell from your shoulders, taking residency on the couch. Seungkwan walked the two of you away from the couch, one of his hands on your back the other holding your arm tightly and tentatively. Almost as if he was afraid that you’ll escape and habituate yourself on the couch again. Your point of focus from the wall was no more, now you were staring around the silent apartment. Your eyes landed on the dinner table, where everything had been left untouched, like nothing had happened. And you wondered if ten minutes had gone by instead of an hour, just like you had presumed.
The sound of rushing water brought you back to your senses as you and Seungkwan entered the bathroom. The lights were dimmed and he had set up the stress relieving candles the two of you had bought on a whim one Sunday afternoon. It was moments like these when you realized you didn’t deserve to have a friend like Seungkwan. A friend would drop everything and be at your side in seconds at the mumble of the first syllable of his name. Once again you were reminded how much better he deserved.
“I-I’m sorry.” You whispered watching him through the fogged out mirror. His long fingers toying with the tiny zipper of your dress, unzipping it slowly, careful not to place his cold palms against your already freezing skin. In a different scenario you would’ve made a sexual innuendo about him seeing you naked, even though he had many times. The two of you lived together and the amount of times either of you had accidentally sleepily walked in on each other either changing or showering was almost laughable. At some point it had become so natural that neither of you strayed away from uninterested pairs of eyes.
“For what?” He raised a brow at you through the mirror. Your dress had now fallen onto the floor leaving you in your matching bra and underwear set. Your arms wrapped tightly around your stomach as you turned around to look at him.
“E-Everything, I’m the w-worst person ever and here you are t-treating me like a delicate flower. I-I don’t deserve you or Vernon or S-Seokmin.” You sniffed blinking rapidly to keep the tears at bay. It was a miracle that you hadn’t ran out of tears considering how much you cried daily. At least three times a week.
Seungkwan let out a laugh and hugged you tightly, his hands brushing the hair away from your face, “You aren’t the worst person ever, right now you might not be your own favorite person or the favorite person of a certain individual.” He pulled back and flicked your forehead gently making you pout, the tears still free falling down your cheeks, his thumbs brushing them away. “I can name a few others that are way worse than you, now get in the bath before I seriously drown you.” Seungkwan treated placing a soft kiss against your forehead. “Sometimes I wish I could take away yours and Vernon’s pain.”
“Then you’d be weighted down even more by pain that doesn’t belong to you.”
“If it gets the two of you smiling again, I’d take the risk any day.”
Seungkwan always keeps true to his word.
While he was aggressively washing your hair, he almost did try to drown you and you had never been more scared for your life.
“This is the last time I let you take care of me.” You pouted bringing your knees up to your naked chest, sending him an almost threatening glare. The tears had stopped along with your shivering, but now you could finally feel the emptiness inside of you.
“That’s gonna be hard, I like taking care of you. It’s like my hobby.” He flashed you a smile before turning his attention back to his almost empty wine glass. You sighed, placing your cheek against your knees watching as he poured himself another generous amount of the overly expensive wine you had bought solely for that night.
“That’s the problem, you shouldn’t like to take care of me, you should’ve kicked me out after my third month here.” You grabbed the bottle from his hand and took a sip from it, cringing at the taste as it traveled down your throat burning slightly. For it to be so expensive you were expecting it to be crafted using grapes sent down from the heavens, but the wine from your corner store was a lot better. Maybe this is where you had gone from in the first place. You had tried to be something you weren’t for Seokmin. Tried to put up a front until you were ready to show him the real you. A foolproof plan that ended up backfiring in the end. You should’ve known.
“Do you remember the first time we met?” Seungkwan took the bottle from your hand and placed it on the floor. He turned to look at you tugging his knees underneath him and leaned an elbow against the edge of the bathtub.
“Yeah, it was New Year’s and you were spending it with Hansol’s family because you and your family weren’t on best terms.” You looked away from his glossy eyes and down at the water surrounding you. You dipped a pruned finger into the water creating a small ripple in the once warm, now lukewarm water.
“Do you remember what you said to me that night before the clock struck twelve.”
You swished your finger around in the water, watching the ripples grow bigger and bigger, your face breaking into a small smile. The first one you had let decorate your face since everything happened. “I said that whenever I felt down I would always think of you because every time I saw you around campus you always had a smile plastered on your face and your head held high.” You said placing your palm against the water surface and then pushing against it watching as the water swallowed your head.
“Do you know how much your words meant to me?” He put down his glass on the edge of the bathtub, “I was going through the worst period of time in my life, my relationship with my family was strained, I was failing my classes and the person I was in love with was getting married but your words helped me get through that time in my life. And that’s why I choose to be there for you always...because you were there for me.”
“Seungkwan I-.” He held his hand up, stopping you from speaking a distant smile plastered on his face as he grabbed the towel next to him and dipped his hand into the bathtub unclogging the drain, creating a tiny whirlpool.
“I know you’re going to tell me that you were drunk and that your words didn’t deserve to have such an impact on me, and that you still don’t deserve my help, but I don’t want to hear it.” He tapped your shoulder signaling for you to stand, in which you obeyed. You watched silently as he wrapped your towel around you tightly, tiny water droplets chasing down your bare arms and legs. “No matter what happens to you, you will always be able to count on me no matter how annoying I might find you sometimes. I will always be there for you, is that clear?” He finished sternly before wrapping his arms around you, hugging you not carrying that you were getting his only designer shirt wet.
“Crystal.”
“Can I ask you a question?” You beamed up at Seungkwan as he tugged you into bed after helping you dry your hair for an hour. If it were up to you, you would’ve gone to sleep right after you changed into your pajamas, but Seungkwan insisted with a nagging finger on drying your hair because “You should never go to sleep with your hair wet unless you want to wake up sick.” Or so he claimed.
“Am I going to have to write a dissertation in order to answer it?” He sat down on the edge of his bed, tugging a leg underneath him, resting his elbow against his thigh, his chin the palm of his hand.
“Nope but you might get mad at me for asking it.” You grinned, positioning your body to the side in a fetal position. Seungkwan rolled his eyes, mumbling how all his hard work in tugging you in had gone to waste and giving you the go head with a small nod of his head.
“Where’s Vernon?”
Seungkwan rolled his eyes before leaning over to turn your light off. “I don’t know. After he brought you inside he ran out saying he had somewhere to be.” He turned the switch leaving the two of you in darkness and silence. “Why do you ask?”
“I want to beat him up for being a jerk.”
“I’ll film it.”
The brightness of the morning sun made you stir in your sleep, making you wish you had listened to Seungkwan when he had suggested that you buy black out curtains, instead of the sheer ones you bought. With a heavy sigh you felt around your bed looking for your phone knowing very well you hadn’t plugged it in to charge. You wanted the battery to drain out that way you wouldn’t anxiously be waiting for a phone call or text that was never going to come.
Frustrated due to the realization you continued your search, digging your palm into your sheets letting them melt between your fingers, wishing the other side of your bed wasn’t cold and empty. But the one person you wanted to be next to you didn’t want anything to do with you anymore.
“Why are you pulling on my hair?”
Your hand came back to you faster than a lightning bolt and you sat up, eyes wide as saucers as you looked down at the last person you were expecting. “Why are you here?” You brought the sheets up to your shirts, covering your arms that were adorned with the thin strap of the tank top you had used to sleep.
Vernon buried his face in your sheets, giving himself a moment to recover from being woken up in such an unpleasant way. He had arrived home two hours ago, took his shoes off in a hurry and rushed to your room. He was met with your sleeping form. Limbs splayed out in all directions, your sheets sliding off your body taking up residency on your bedroom floor.
He smiled feeling the nostalgia take over his body like a poisonous drink. He longed to wake up next to you, with the sheets missing and your arm draped his face, while silent snores fell out of your mouth as you stayed sleeping without a care in the world. He looked forward to those mornings. Especially when he was losing you because it was the only time that felt like nothing was happening. The only time he wouldn’t have to avoid looking at you for fear of breaking down whenever he saw the hurt in your eyes. And as you had slept after the shit show that had happened earlier that night, albeit all his fault. He found himself longing for those few seconds of silence as he watched you sleep.
So, he moved through your room with caution, dodging the specs of light coming in through your window. He picked up your from the floor and carefully placed them on top of you again before sitting down on the floor. His elbow on your bed, chin resting on the palm of your hand and he watched you sleep. The tears prickling in the corners of his eyes, this would be the last time he would be seeing you. At least for a while. He wanted to take everything in, engrave the image of your sleeping face in his mind so he wouldn’t forget about it for a while.
Unaware he had fallen asleep, and now here he was. His heart thumping out of his chest feeling your eyes dig themselves into the side of his head. He could only be honest, his intentions weren’t malicious to begin with, and lying to you always tore him apart. “I came to say goodbye.” He whispered, raising his head. He brought his hands up to his eyes and diligently rubbed the sleep out of his eyes. His vision grew spotty from how hard he had rubbed them.
“Oh...where are you going?” You sat up, resting your back against the headboard. It surprised you how soft your voice sounded as it left your mouth and you could tell it had surprised him too. You like him were expecting the coldness, but instead both of your ears were met with warmth.
“I’m moving back into my parents house, until I find my own place. I was selfish in coming here in the first place. I thought that now because I was alone again we could be together again.” He nodded, focusing on your closet door avoiding your face as the words rushed out of his mouth. “I don’t think we should see each other anymore...at least for a while.” He tore his gaze away from the door and turned to his you. “I’m sorry for everything.”
A veil of silence swallowed your waking bodies, as the rising sun finished its journey and stayed put. The golden hues of the rays illuminated Vernon’s side profile, bringing out the tiny freckles underneath his eyes. They were bloodshot, you could tell he hadn’t slept despite him just waking up, making you feel a little guilty. If you hadn’t prolonged this situation as much as you did then maybe things would’ve been different last night and this morning. Maybe you’d be waking up to Seokmin’s soft touches instead of Vernon’s broken and guilt ridden stare.
“I wanted you here Vernon.” You whispered, wrapping your arms around your legs, resting your chin on top of your knees. “We’re equally at fault, though you had been acting like an asshole and I’m still a little upset with you. It’s not all your fault.” You nodded, skimming your hand down your covered legs and placed it on top of his.
Vernon sighed removing his hand from underneath yours, your touch ignited something inside of him. Something he needed to keep at bay in order to let you go once and for all. “I talked to him last night.” He leaned back on his arms, his fingers digging into the fuzziness of your white carpet. He looked at you through his bangs, smiling at the confusion written all over your sleepy face. “Dokyeom, he’s funny.”
The sound of his name sounded foreign coming out of Vernon’s mouth. You almost convinced yourself you had still been dreaming if it wasn’t for the clattering pans in the kitchen, obviously Seungkwan’s doing. “You’re lying to me again.”
“I only lied to you once and I regret it every waking moment I see you, but this time I’m not.” He said crossing his jean clad legs underneath him, “I followed him after I brought you back inside, he punched me.” He laughed and pointed to the side of his jaw that had started to form a light bruise, making your brows furrow in concern. “It’s not as bad as it looks, my jaw is still intact, plus I deserved it.”
“You did. If he hadn’t done I would’ve.”
“Yeah, and it would’ve hurt more coming from you.” He rolled his eyes brushing off the subject with a swipe of his hand against the air, “I apologized to him and he taught me how to make a vase...did you know he’s part owner of a pottery studio?”
You laughed at the splendor in Vernon’s voice. The awkward air that had been crushing both pairs of lungs subsided, “I did he promised he’d take me one day but I guess it won’t happen now.” You shrugged, a side smile forming against your lips. “I’m a little jealous you got to live out my fantasy.”
“Yeah his hands are big and muscular and soft, I felt safe in his arms as he taught me how to form the shape.” Vernon joked. You rolled your eyes and grabbed your pillow before hitting him with it, making him groan. “That hurt.”
“Good, I was hoping it did.”
“You’re just jealous that he and I share a birthday.”
“No you don’t.” You pouted and laid down again crossing your arms in front of you like a child. The guilt consumed you once again but this time because you had been so focused with your problems that you hadn’t taken the chance to actually get to know Seokmin. You hadn’t actually tried to get to know him better and you couldn’t blame him for what he had told you last night. If you were in his shoes, you would also regret ever meeting you.
“What else did he say?” You voiced, untangling your arms and turning your body to face Vernon’s sitting form. He smiled before standing up and brushing the invisible lint balls from his jeans. He extended his hand for your to take, earning a curious stare from you.
“He wants to see you but first you have to eat breakfast.”
After a very uneventful breakfast that consisted of Seungkwan’s nagging (out of love) and leftovers. The three of you helped Vernon carry his stuff out to his car. It was a bittersweet feeling, to see the same scenario play out the same way it did almost over a year ago. This time neither of you were hurting and longing for one another.
“Get in.” Vernon shouted as he closed the trunk of his car, dusting his hands in front of him. He pointed to the passenger seat door, a wide smile on his face as he rounded the corner and opened the door. “I have to take you somewhere.”
“W-What, but I-I haven’t showered and I’m still in my pajamas.” You looked between Vernon who was holding open the door and Seungkwan who had started looking around, whistling and you realized that whatever Vernon was planning, Seungkwan had been in on it too.
“You look fine, now get in before I get punched again.”
“Kwanie help me please.” You pleaded grabbing onto the sleeves of his coat. Not knowing what was happening or what was going to happen only added to the stress of last night.
“I think I left the stove on, I’m going to go save our apartment from burning down.” He winked peeling your fingers from the sleeves of his coat and shoved you towards the car. “Have fun, don’t stay out too late, you still have to clean your room.” He shouted as he turned around and started jogging towards the entrance of the building.
“I have no choice do I?” You sighed looking at Vernon’s scheming face. He shook his head and signaled you to hurry up with the sudden movement of his hand. “Fine, if I end up dead though I’m coming back to haunt you and Seokmin’s asses.” You mumbled in annoyance, the skin of your legs gaining bumps as a cold breeze blew.
Vernon waited, holding the door to his car open for you as you quickly got into the passenger seat of his car. While you got in quickly desperately seeking some kind of warmth. “Are you ready?” He closed the door gently once he was sure you were fully inside and buckled up, leaning his elbows against the open window.
“To be kidnapped, nope. But I have no choice.”
Vernon stopped his car in front of an unnamed warehouse, unlocked the doors and basically shooed you out of it, “The side door is unlocked.” He said, pointing to an inconspicuous grey door before speeding off and leaving you alone, your heart against your throat.
You stood there in the middle of the parking lot, the bitter cold wrapping around you like a frozen blanket. And for once in your life you wished you had new friends, preferably ones that wouldn’t leave you in the middle of nowhere, in your pajamas and without a phone. You realized you had left it midway through your silent journey in Vernon’s old car. You had reached over for the volume knob turning it all the way down. The song that belonged to one of the mixtapes he had once made disappeared from his failing speakers. He had laughed when you told him, “You won’t need it anyway.” He reassured, pressing his foot on the gas as the light turned to an obnoxious yellow.
Now you were left stranded, cold and fearing for your life, refusing to move from your spot, eyeing the grey door in suspicion and fear. “Come in before you die.” You jumped as the grey door slammed open, revealing a boy with reddish hair and glasses perched on top of his nose, wearing grey paint splattered overalls. You contemplated ignoring him at first but then another cold breeze blew, followed by a few snowflakes and you knew you had no choice, but to follow the boys commands.
“Who are you?” You questioned as you jogged towards him and then past him, your body engulfed with the warmth of the warehouse, and you let out a sigh of relief.
“Minghao, I’m one of the owners of this place.” He said after closing the door behind him making you jump slightly at the sound of metal hitting metal. “You know we’re in the middle of winter, not summer.” He said pointedly, eyeing you down. And you felt stupid although your attire hadn’t been your doing. If it had been entirely up to you, you wouldn’t be wearing sleep shorts, a tank top, a thin sweater and soping house slippers.
“Yeah, it’s a long story.”
“And I’m sure I’ll hear it one day but your lover boy is waiting behind the curtains.” Minghao smiled and wrapped a black winter coat around your shoulders, rubbing your arms gently before pulling away. “He hasn’t slept, so please tell him too once you finish confessing your love to one another or whatever people do after a fight.” He shoved you lightly towards the creme curtains that separated what seemed like an art room from whatever room was on the other side.
“Also if you need to do like gross couple stuff, can you do it in his room and not the living room.” He stated before grabbing a paint brush and sitting in front of a half painted canvas. Nothing had taken shape yet and you wondered if that was his intention or if he was stuck and just decided to paint whatever came to his mind. Whatever the reason was, you’d have to wait because the creme colored curtain was whispering your name at a decibel only you could hear begging you to reveal what was on the other side. So, you did, pulling it back harder than you had intended, your breath catching itself in the back of your throat.
Your eyes traveled around what seemed to be a living room. The navy blue couch had been pushed to the far end of the room, the back resting against the brick wall. A whole wall filled with all the books you could imagine and you found yourself laughably fighting the urge to run your finger tips against all their spines. There was a kitchen, though it looked more like it had never been used, the overflowing sink filled with dishes told you otherwise. And finally sitting in the middle, on a paint splattered dining room table was Seokmin, his bright and pleading eyes taking your attention away from the bags that laid underneath them. A two tier crooked cake sitting in front of him, with the words “I’m sorry,” written in purple icing.
“Seokmin I-” You started but the words escaped your mouth as your feet mindlessly made your way towards him. For a split second you stood in front of him as he looked up at you, his hands shaking on his lap, and you threw yourself at him, hugging him tightly as you buried your face into his neck taking in his scent. Fearing that this might be the last time you would be smelling it, as it almost was. “I’m so sorry, I should’ve told you sooner, but I got scared. I didn’t want you to think of me as different, as impure, used, b-broken. I-I don’t know.” Your words rushed out almost creating an incoherent sentence against his soft skin. You felt him suck in a breath before wrapping his arms around you tightly, his palms running down your back soothingly.
“I’m sorry too I wasn’t completely honest with you either. I know how you felt, it wasn’t easy for me when I first lost the person I loved and I wasn’t expecting to find you so soon that day either at the field.” He whispered, kissing your temple gently before pulling back and brushing the loose strands of hair away from your face. “I told you that I’d wait for you but I think I was telling myself that too.”
“Wait you mean...what...when?” You searched his face for any indication of incenserity but all you found was warmth, longing and love.
“Around spring of last year, we were by the cherry blossoms when it happened.” He nodded and you felt the sting of colorful swirls erupt inside of you. “They left me that day and I haven’t seen them since.” He finished cradling your face in his hands, looking into your eyes with so much intensity you were sure you would melt.
“That’s when it happened to Vernon and I.” You placed a palm against your forehead, your blowing out of their sockets because for the first time since that day everything had started to fall into place.
“He told me last night, we also share a birthday which is crazy.” He said matter of factly, causing a small laugh to escape your lips, “do you think we can maybe start over?” He pouted, brushing the stray tears that had fallen from the corner of your eyes way.
“I’d love nothing more Seokmin.” You whispered and closed the tiny gap between the two of you finally connecting your lips with his, the butterflies erupting in the pits of your stomach. Behind your closed eyelids you could see the colorful burst of emotions harbored deep inside you, turning different shades of blue, purple and pink as the kiss deepened. It was something you had never witnessed before and to say it was overwhelming would be an understatement. You felt on cloud nine and you didn’t want it to stop, but the air was running out of your lungs the quicker the kiss got and you could tell Seokmin was feeling the same way as his chest started heaving underneath your palms, so you pulled back, your pants matching up with his.
For the first time since you met him, your world around you seemed to intensify. Everything was brighter, glowing with a fierceness you had never once experienced. The two of you stayed silent staring into each other’s eyes, your heart hammering against your chest as you noticed the subtle specs of gold that were mixed deep within his dark eyes. You didn’t want to stop looking at them, not when you felt his hand cup your chin to pull you back in for another kiss.
“Do you feel it too?” You whispered, your lips hovering over his threatening to close the gap again.
“Feel what?” He teased, rubbing his nose against yours, heating up the blood in your body. And you prayed he wouldn’t see the slight sheen of sweat that had started to form against your hairline.
“Like you’re home?”
“Yes” The simple three letter word, sent you into a frenzy and you once again kissed him. This time with more fever than the last, because in Seokmin’s arms you finally felt like you could fall.
#seventeen fanfiction#seventeen x reader#seventeen imagines#seventeen scenarios#seventeen angst#seventeen fluff#seventeen fanfic#seventeen seokmin#seventeen dk#seventeen dokyeom#Seokmin x reader#Seokmin imagines#seokmin fanfic#seokmin scenarios#seokmin fluff#seokmin angst#dokyeom x reader#dokyeom fanfic#dokyeom imagines#dokyeom scenarios
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Harry Potter Nsfw Alphabet
I've wanted to do this for a while! Warning: Smut
A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)
When you're finally done, he is the absolute sweetest. He gives the best cuddles and after really long and demanding night, he is happy to run a bath. He makes sure you drink plenty of water. You ask, and he delivers.
B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)
His favorite body part on you is your hands. He loves how small they look in his. He loves the feeling of you scratching his back as he pounded into you. He loves watching you fist the sheets when you come.
His favorite body part of his is his arms. He was proud of how they looked. He worked hard to get them that way, and he was gonna own it. He can also hold you with them. He can pick you up and toss you over his shoulder with them. He can place you gently on the bed with them.
C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person)
He loves cumming inside of you, either in you're mouth or in your pussy. The sight of his cum being swallowed or leaking out of your cunt is just *chef's kiss*
D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
He loves fucking you in a skirt and nothing else.
E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)
He wasn't the most experienced when he met you, but he is a very fast learner.
F = Favourite Position (This goes without saying. Will probably include a visual)
Missionary. He loves looking into your eyes as he makes love to you. He also likes cowgirl, too. He loves seeing you bounce on his cock.
G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)
It really depends. There are many times when it's very goofy and light hearted (particularly morning sex), and there's other times when it's serious and romantic.
H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)
He just kinda let's it do it's thing. He washes it, gives it the occasional trim, but he doesn't do much other then that.
I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)
He's always very intimate. Sex is thought to be a precious experience and no matter what Harry wants you to feel that, even if he is literally plowing into you from behind.
J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)
He used to do it quite a bit, but ever since you and him became sexually active, he did it less and less. Nothing beats the real thing ;). He does it sometimes if you're not around but it's not the same, you know?
K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)
Praise kink. Both giving and receiving. He loves hearing your moans of praise and he adores whispering how good you make him feel into you're ear. He also lowkey has a breeding kink. I mean, he's always wanted a family. It's just a neat bonus that the thought of you carrying his children really gets him going.
L = Location (Favourite places to do the do)
The couch in the common room. He believes it's more comfortable than his bed. Luckily, he hasn't gotten yet, though there have been some close calls.
M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)
1. Tugging on his hair
2. Neck kisses
3. Whispering in his ear
4. Bending over
N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)
Doesn't like knife play. He's worried that he will hurt you and that is the last he would want to do! (Accept for spanking. He does enjoy a good spanking.)
O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)
He loooooooooooves giving oral. He thinks you taste better than every candy at Honeyduke's. He thinks you look more beautiful than a veela. And there is no better feeling than you cumming on his tongue. Sure, he loves a good blowjob, but he adores eating you out.
P = Pace (Are they fats and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)
Yes. Sometimes, especially at the beginning, it's very slow and soft with words of affection and lingering kisses. Lately however, it usually ends with you losing your voice and not being able to walk the next day.
Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)
He's not opposed to it, but he definitely prefers normal sex. He normal does them before a quidditch game.
R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)
Absolutely. He's down for pretty much whatever.
S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)
He can make you cum 3 times before he uses his dick and then can go for 2 more rounds, each lasting at least 20 minutes.
T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)
You do have a decent collection of toys in your closet. He enjoys them, but he certainly prefers you.
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)
This boi. This motherfucker. He can and will tease you for literal hours before you can cum. He does it till you're begging him to stop. But he always let's you finish at the end tho...
V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)
He doesn't make really loud noises until he's close. Until then, it's whimpers and gasps.
W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)
He likes cockwarming. He is very touch starved and he loves cuddles. Cockwarming is just a very intimate version of cuddling.
X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)
He's a solid 7 inches and thick as all hell. He almost hurt you the first time because he was so thick.
Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)
Decently high. Like, he's not horny every second of every day, but he can't go a month with a good fuck.
Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
He doesn't sleep before you do. He loves to watch your eyes flutter under your eyelids. He likes watching your breathing even out. He can't rest easy until he knows you're comfortable.
#harry potter#harry james potter#harry potter x reader#harry potter smut#harry potter x reader smut#harry potter x y/n#harry potter x you#harry james potter x reader
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Metallic (18+)
-- Karl Heisenberg X OC (AFAB, She/They) --
Oh lord here we go- Ok, first off, y'all get a small paragraph beforehand, please forgive me. :'D I've... never posted smut THIS PUBLICLY before. This is admittedly incredibly nerve-wracking and I'm hella nervous because I feel like I write... 'conservatively'? You'll see what I mean. So... Please go easy on me for this one...? I'm great for sweet stuff and angst, but smut is a whole other beast despite NSFW being one of my favorite art forms when drawing. I mean, I've already made a few *spicy* art pieces for them, but just... Writing is difficult. I mean, I really hope you guys like it anyway!! But fair warning. THIS is new for me. QuQ I do have a few more smut pieces in the works, but this was the first one written.
So uh... on to the story, I guess...!
**Small reminder that I have a small 'Masterlist' for these!**
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*Warning?: Hella smut, lots of biting, choking and kisses, some blood from said biting, just rough sex in general? Normal, to rough, to fluff. not entirely sure what else to add?? :'D It's all consensual, no worries.
Summary: With some high tensions, a smart mouth, and some unfortunate forgetfulness, Emelia gets herself into a bit of... 'trouble' with the notorious Metal Man. But maybe this time she bit off a bit more than she could chew... Not that she really ends up minding.
A pair of footsteps echoed through the underground tunnels of the factory, almost mimicking the constant sounds of pickaxes being dug into the stone. The walking man looked around every once in a while, seemingly proud of whatever progress had been made.
"All is going well. Good, good." He said proudly, puffing on the cigar he held between his fingers. The woman next to him rolled her eye. The small lights of the tunnels glinted in the glasses he wore as he turned his head to glance at her. "Is there a problem?" He chuckled.
"If by 'well' you mean 'excruciatingly slow by dimwitted slaves', then yes."
"Would you like to join them then, Emmy?"
"Bloody hell, no. I'm still sore from lugging those damned carts around..." Emelia mumbled, reaching to rub behind her neck. The man next to her chuckled again, handing over his cigar. He stepped forward slightly as she took it, holding out his free arm.
"And yet you're still walking!" He chimed, looking back at her as she puffed on the cigar, herself. "We'll change that soon enough."
"I'm not working myself to death, Heisenberg." She huffed, picking up speed and shoving the cigar back into his face. "While factory productions are important to me too, perhaps learn the definition of a 'break', and not as in 'break my back'."
Karl took the cigar with amusement as she walked forward ahead, clearly heading back to the main building.
"First you tell me to work harder, then you say not at all." He mused, following closely. "Has it ever occurred to you that maybe I can do what I want?"
"And yet, what you want is what affects YOUR factory in the long run... Timing, Karl."
"You act as if you know more about MY factory than I do."
"And what do you know?"
"Everything."
"Good, then you know I'm heading upstairs to rest for a moment."
"I assumed so."
~
The two wandered along the corridors to a hall with stairs leading to a metal door, sharing the cigar before she went forward and kicked the door open, snorting as she heard an irritated grunt behind her.
"If you break that, you're fixing it." He muttered, setting his hammer down to the side as he took the cigar from her. She snorted, tossing her own weapon to the side, watching it land on a pile of fabrics used for either covering machinery or covering herself when she slept, whichever happened to come first.
"You say that as if it would be difficult." She retorted, taking her hair out of the tie it was in and running her hand through it before stretching slightly as he walked past her to sit in a chair next to a desk in the room they were in. It was similar to a bedroom, but not quite. 'More like an office with a small bed' , she always said, occasionally taking residence on said 'bed' when she was tired. She felt Heisenbergs eyes on her as her muscles stretched and popped, and she let out a satisfied groan.
"It wouldn't be, but you'll have to make a new one from scratch." He said, arching a brow as he leaned back in the chair. She rolled her eye, moving to stretch her arms in front of her.
"Again, not hard." She shrugged, finally moving towards the desk he was next to. "Making a door takes less brains than you already have."
"Are you calling me an idiot?"
"I'm not calling you a genius."
She almost laughed as she saw him pause before taking a long drag on the cigar.
"I'm going to pretend I didn't just hear you say that." He sighed. She shrugged, leaning over the table and looking over the papers that had been laying on it.
"It's a joke, Heisenberg. I'll admit you're more intelligent than you let on." She said, moving the papers and other objects slightly while looking at them. She then paused as she held them, her eye going over the plans, x-rays, and sketches. "Did you leave out the other Soldat plans?"
"They're in with the cadou notes. I thought you would have seen them." He said simply, reaching for a manila folder on the corner of the table. He put the cigar in his mouth as he opened it and flipped through with a huff. "The new ones haven't been functioning properly, damn things... I'm thinking of rewiring the circuits to the brain.".
"Wouldn't that cause more damage than good?"
"Not if it's done properly." He chewed on the cigar for a moment before flipping over one of the papers. "The worst that could happen is the head exploding from the current. In that case-"
"Lycan food?" She suggested. He nodded in agreement.
"Lycan food. They're mostly useless to me otherwise..."
"As are most things..." she muttered, earning a glance. She looked back at him. "What? Am I wrong?"
"Not necessarily. Others do still have use."
"How?" She asked, turning to face him. "No head means no use."
He shrugged, tossing the folder back onto the table before leaning back in the chair.
"Replace certain muscle tissue and bones with pneumatic or hydraulic systems, whichever proves to be less of a pain in the ass that day, hot wire circuits to the remaining muscle structures, add an engine system into the chest with a strong battery..." he tilted his head slightly, almost as if he were picturing the plans in his head, thinking of more details as he went along. "They would quite literally be mindless, but a few shocks and currents would make them go just fine."
"Sounds a bit like you..." Emelia snorted, turning back to the table to organize the papers as he glared at her. "Shall I pick a few poor sods from the village to test this?"
"Or I could just use you..." he muttered.
"You wouldn't dare."
"Keep making your ass-backwards comments and see what happens." He shot back, finally pushing himself up to stand. "Yes, I'd like you to do that. Fresh bodies work best for the experiments. I'll send out the Lycans as well, given they don't tear them apart."
"That wouldn't matter anyway, Karl. You'll just stitch them back up like you always do."
"I could, couldn't I?" He started, taking a step closer to stand next to her with a sinister smile. "Or I could make YOU do it. You seem to have fun with tearing things apart and putting them back together-"
"I'm NOT sewing your bloody creations together." She interrupted. "I'll kill them and I'll tear them to shreds, or I'll assist with the inner workings of the mechanics. I don't sew."
"You'll learn."
"Like hell I will."
"I'll make you."
"Bullocks."
"Keep talking, Emelia." He dared, his voice lowering in a threatening manor. "I'm not in the mood."
"You were before we got here." She challenged. She only held her breath as he suddenly snuffed out the cigar on the table itself while his eyes seemed to stare directly through her.
"That's what happens when you keep insulting me, Emmy. I start to get angry. You know that."
She felt a chill down her spine at his voice. It was different from any other time she had aggravated him... It was as if she were in actual danger. His face was only inches away from hers, and he smirked once he noticed her hesitation.
"Scared, Emelia?"
She kept her eye on him, watching his movements carefully. No, No she wasn't in danger... Maybe.
"No." She replied, lifting her chin slightly as he arched a brow.
"Oh?"
"What is it you say to me...? I'm 'in a mood'...? Because I believe you're currently in one, yourself." She asked, finally moving forward and brushing past him in a nonchalant manor despite being somewhat stiff in her movements. "Drink some coffee and throw a few things around with that power of yours, you'll be fine."
She felt his eyes on her as she neared a cushioned chair against the wall.
"I'll throw YOU around..." He growled, taking amusement in her body slowing down as he spoke. He walked towards her as she turned to face him. "See how that pretty mouth works after your head goes through a wall."
"You forget I've stopped your hammer with my arm." She huffed, crossing her arms over her chest before smirking. "You smashing my head through a wall would be as effective as Sturm trying to hold something with his nubs."
"You don't seem to understand what I can do to you, Emelia."
"And you don't seem to understand the amount of fucks I don't give, Karl."
His arm twitched slightly, and she glanced over as metal pieces on the floor began to shake just slightly. She just hoped he wouldn't direct his power towards her...
"If you would like to play, I'll GLADLY entertain you."
She suddenly got in his face, a mischievous, antagonistic spark in the gold of her eye.
"Entertain me HOW? Throw me to the Lycans? The Varcolacs? Hell, let Urias get ahold of me, see what happens."
He bared his teeth in a snarl, though the corners of his mouth stayed in a malicious grin.
"I'll turn YOU into a goddamn Soldat, you'll be so full of metal you won't be able to FUNCTION without me-"
"I'm more afraid of your SISTER than I am you!"
Her smirk widened as she saw a sudden spark of anger in his face, his smile faltering.
"Don't you dare attempt to bring that bitch into this, I'll put my hammer straight into your skull-"
"TRY ME, THEN-" She started, only to give a yelping gasp in surprise as Heisenberg slammed her against the wall by her throat.
"Shut your damn hole!!!-" He snarled. His grip was tight, but he seemed to stop once he glanced at her open mouth. All of a sudden the air around them changed, and she stared at him with confusion in her one golden eye. "Oh, Emmy, you didn't tell me!" He said with a sudden cheerful tone, moving his hand from her throat to her jaw. He switched so quickly...
"Wh-" she began, only to stop as her jaw was yanked open. She was confused until she saw the reflection of her tongue piercing in his glasses.
Shit.
"Well well, I guess you've got some metal in you after all. I won't have to try as hard..." He chuckled, tilting his head as she stared at her own reflection. "What else are you hiding from me, Emmy?"
Her eye was wide in simultaneous fear and curiosity. She knew she couldn't have hidden the piercings forever, but certainly longer than this. She usually at least took the one out of her mouth when around him given how often they talked for this reason... But even then, he had never noticed it before. Why now?! She kicked herself for forgetting. She wanted to shove him away... Shove him and run. Would he chase her? He was most definitely trying to scare her, she knew that much... But she also wanted to know how far he would actually go if she did nothing. Would he rip them out if he found the others? Use them as control like he mentioned? Or would he leave her alone? Something told her the latter was out of the question as he showed growing interest in her silence.
"N-.... Nothing..." she managed, nudging her jaw out of his grip. "I just-"
"You're a liar, Emelia." He said, his grin growing wider. She gave a huff and shook her head.
"I am not, you ridiculous-"
She was stopped with a startled gasp as a gloved thumb was shoved between her jaws, nearly propping her mouth open.
"Now now, this'll go far easier if you do it my way. Now open up."
He lifted his other hand to his face, taking a finger of the glove between his teeth and sliding it off. The glove fell to the ground between them, and she watched as he reached for her face with his bare hand. She flinched slightly as his fingers pressed against her lower jaw, though admittedly relaxed as his thumb drifted over her bottom lip. The skin was expectantly rough, she found, calloused and covered in smaller scars. She closed her eye as it drifted over her sharp lower teeth before thrusting over her tongue, pushing it back and causing a small gaging reflex. It tasted... metallic... Metallic with hints of other things. Not quite metal, not quite blood... Maybe residual oil? Maybe a hint of the cigars. She couldn't tell exactly what it was, but the mixture wasn't bad... She really didn't mind much. She could almost feel the interested look on his face as she relaxed, though she attempted to hide it. Oh god, was she enjoying this...? She only flinched as he pressed his thumb against the muscle, pushing it out of her mouth somewhat to see the piercing fully.
"Let's see how much you're hiding from me, shall we?" He grinned.
There was a moment of confused silence before she felt his thumb press against the metal rod, her eye snapping open with a gasping yelp as what felt like electric sparks and currents traveled through that piercing, as well as the others.
All the others.
The sparks lasted only a second, but a second was all that was needed as her back arched slightly away from the wall. Heisenberg took a step back in surprise as Emelia suddenly collapsed to her knees, shaking and panting ever so slightly out of shock and... something else. She doubled over with a wide eye, an arm covering her chest and the other pressed against her abdomen and ever tightening thighs. What the hell WAS that...?! What the fuck did he do?!
"W-.... Wh-...." she tried, trying to voice her thoughts. But alas, despite the tingling feeling up her spine disappearing, she couldn't. She couldn't even move as she heard movement directly in front of her, the shock of the feeling only allowing her to look up as he grabbed her chin and lifted her face to meet his. She watched as he kneeled, only to look up and see the most smug grin she had ever seen.
"Liar liar, Emmy... You know how I hate liars." He chimed, adding to the smug aura he held. It pissed her off, but she couldn't do much about it now... She then grew nervous as he tilted his head, taking in her reaction fully as she stared at him with an ever-deepening red blush on her cheeks. "If I was more foolish, I'd say you enjoyed that."
"I-I... D-did NOT...!!" She snapped, stopping with a small squeak as he shoved his thumb back into her mouth to silence her.
He was met with another squealing whine as he pressed against the piercing once more, gleefully sending more currents through the metal pieces in her body. Emelia reached up to shakily grab his arm as the piercing was left alone once more, though the residual shock still remained. She wanted to say something... Say ANYTHING... but the feeling in her face, chest and thighs was so odd and... and good... It kept her silent, and Heisenberg took interest.
"Lycan got your tongue?" He joked, chuckling as she let out a growl. He found it amusing, of course. She only frowned as he tilted his head with the ever present smirk, his sharp teeth glinting in the dim light of the room. "You know, Emmy..." he started, yanking her forward by the jaw slightly as she kept her hold on his arm. "I can't help but wonder how it tastes."
She felt another shiver down her spine at the sickeningly curious tone in his voice. Taste... Taste?? She stared at him as he removed his thumb from her mouth, though nearly started to form words immediately in stupid curiosity. The answer came to her quickly, however, in the form of a hand around her neck, a mouth to hers, and being shoved against the wall once more. She made an almost strangled noise as her back hit the concrete, her mind attempting to play catch-up as she felt something being shoved into her mouth. More sparks traveled along the piercings as his tongue slid over hers, and she let out a whining growl in response.
The taste of metal and the slightest bit of sweetness filled her mouth, along with the taste of the cigar they had shared only minutes prior. But... Why did it taste so good? Why wasn't she fighting him? She found herself frozen for a few moments as the realization set in that she... truly enjoyed this. He couldn't have known, could he? There was no WAY he could have known... Oh god, what was wrong with her? She generally wanted to strangle the man, but now...
She allowed the frustration from earlier to bubble in her chest, giving her control of her limbs for a few moments. Heisenberg began to back off, thoroughly satisfied in her reactions and his 'taste test' before she suddenly grabbed the front of his jacket and yanked him back against her, giving a quiet grunt as her back was forced against the wall again with his weight. He was brought to his knees at the force of the tug, and it was her turn to feel satisfaction as a startled grunt left this throat.
Emelia returned the forceful kiss with all her strength, her back arching somewhat with the now consistent current from the piercings. Her legs shook slightly as she felt a warm feeling in her thighs from the current, unintentionally letting out quiet whimpers and heavy breaths into the kiss. His hand stayed pressed to her throat before he moved it to the side of her neck and shoved her head upwards with his thumb. He tore himself away to attack her neck immediately, licking along the skin before closing his jaws around it. She gasped as he moved along her neck, leaving bloody bites and bruises while using his free hand to nearly rip at her shirt. The fabric was pulled it from its tucked position, his grip tearing a few holes in the worn fabric as he held it taught away from her skin. She couldn't help it as her heavy breaths turned into pants, and she gripped his arm tighter as she felt the fabric continue to tear from a mixture of his grip and her squirming from the feeling between her legs. She shuddered as he finally pulled away from her now very bruised neck, his lips hovering right against her ear.
"Let me taste all of them, then." He growled, returning his hand to around her neck and squeezing along the bottom of her jaw.
Her squirming paused in his grip. 'Please, oh PLEASE-' she thought, secretly wishing to rip the shirt off, herself. But he couldn't know that... If he did, she knew he'd taunt her mercilessly. Not that he wasn't doing the same now... Instead she shook her head just slightly, trying to even out her breathing.
"W-Wait-" she started quietly, only to gasp once more as he finally tore the front of the shirt clean off from the seams. He tossed the fabric to the side as her back arched to meet the new air her front was exposed to, the newly revealed silver nipple piercings glinting as her body moved.
"Too late." He chuckled deeply, grabbing her by the side and bringing her chest forward as if he were claiming a prize.
He leaned down slightly, his arm wrapping around her as his mouth returned to her skin. He kissed and nipped to her shoulders and collarbone until his lips met the tip of the large scar that rested between her breasts. She swore she could almost see something flicker in his shade-covered eyes as he seemed to study it before nipping at it carefully. The nips were... oddly careful. It was as if he knew what it was... She managed to compose herself enough to speak, one of her hands moving to nudge his shoulder. She couldn't help but give a nervous gulp as he looked up at her, his eyes burning as if her touch had fueled the fire.
"N-... N-Not... um..." she tried, her voice oddly timid. She knew what was happening, though the idea made her nervous... "N-Not... here..."
"Hm?" He tilted his head slightly, loosening his grip on her neck. He then followed her gaze to the small 'bed' in the corner of the room- though it was more like a single mattress over a solid 'frame' with random odd pillows along the wall and multiple covers lumped on top. It was how she liked it.
"Th-There... uh..." she looked away for a moment, heavily aware her burning cheeks. "P-... P-Please..."
She could nearly feel his smile against her skin as he chuckled, though he didn't reply. It was then that she was suddenly picked up with a surprised yelp and tossed over his shoulder, her knees pressing against his sides to balance herself. She managed to hold on long enough before he walked to the 'bed', landing roughly onto it as she was tossed. She nearly scrambled to sit up until she looked up at him, watching him quickly close the space between them, removing his thick jacket and single remaining glove.
"Stay still, Emmy. The show is just getting started." He taunted, unbuttoning the long sleeve shirt he wore before kneeling onto the cushion and looming over her. She couldn't help as her vision traveled down what she could see of his chest, seeing similar scars along his skin.
She opened her mouth to speak, giving a quiet yelp as she was shoved into the sheets by her neck, her legs now situated around his waist. Her back arched as he leaned over, biting at her shoulder and collarbone once more before around one breast and onto the other. She gave a whining gasp as he reached the peak, his tongue swirling around the sensitive skin and the small bar of metal pierced through it, his teeth grazing the it ever so slightly. He used his other hand to trail along the scar on her chest and down to her pierced belly, his rough fingers caressing the skin until they pushed underneath the tied overalls. Her legs twitched as his fingers reached the piercing between them, feeling as it was surrounded by a moist warmth. He smirked.
"I knew it." He said, rubbing against the piercing and bundle of nerves with another jolt of electricity before removing his hand. She couldn't help the whine that left her throat as her hips bucked lightly from the feeling, and he chuckled. "Easy..." he muttered, returning the palm of his hand to her stomach and shoving her down.
He dug his fingers into the skin around the belly piercing as she glanced down, and she made another strangled noise as he sent another wide current through her piercings. Her back arched as he pressed harder to keep her down, though she was startled as he suddenly crushed his mouth against hers once more. The small currents pulsed in a slow rhythm as she returned the kiss, her legs shaking and tightening against his hips. She let out a soft cry against his lips as the pulses increased, her grip on his arm tightening and even pulling him closer as the waves of a small orgasm rushed through her in spasms. The feeling was strengthened with the addition of... something pressed to her thighs underneath their clothing. But the waves... The small spasms that affected the muscles of her back and legs... While it hadn't been something she had felt even when human, and while she knew what it was, all she knew was that it felt good. REALLY good...
She could have sworn up and down she hated the man at any point before this, but as he broke the kiss and pulled away to look at her, she couldn't help but feel... want? Desire? Whatever it was, she knew she didn't want it to stop at the moment, and that's all that mattered to her. She still didn't want to give in so easily... But god damn was this feeling hard to fight off.
"D-... D-Damn you..." she nearly whispered, her voice wavering slightly. She was met with an amused chuckle as he removed his glasses and lightly sent them to the table they had been at before.
"Just what I like to hear..." He taunted, removing his hand from her throat. "Tell me, Emmy... Do you want more? Feel free to say nothing if you do."
She stared at him as he gave another sly grin, opening her mouth as if to protest... But she couldn't. Instead, she remained silent, though gave an irritated, embarrassed huff as she glanced off to the side. Her lip curled into a silent snarl as he gave another chuckle.
"I thought as much." He replied, leaning up. His fingers were dragged along her skin as he moved, trailing along other scars that littered her skin.
She glanced down to follow his hands, watching as they trailed over her hips and around to her front where the knot in the tied mechanic suit she wore. With one quick movement it was untied and loosened, and she jumped as everything was suddenly pulled away and off of her hips, sliding down her thighs. She froze at the new rush of cool air surrounding the warmth between her thighs, and suddenly the entirety of the clothing was removed as he seamlessly pulled it away from her legs. Now she was completely bare in front of him... Exposed.
The desire to cover herself was overwhelming as she met his eyes, seeing the smugness and sense of possession he gave as he took in every visible inch of her skin. Her arms and legs twitched in an attempt to cover any vulnerable areas, but she suddenly found her arms pinned next to her head and his hips against the backs of her thighs to keep them open.
"Don't you dare." He grumbled, a smirk still on his face as he glanced down slightly before looking back up at her face. "I haven't tasted everything yet."
"Wh-..." she tried, her legs twitching again.
She was met with another kiss as he leaned down, though it didn't last long. She let out quiet pants as his lips and teeth moved along her jaw to her neck, leaving more bites and bruises among the ones that already stained the skin. Her arms twitched as he reached her breasts again, hit tongue repeating the same actions as before on both piercings before finally returning to the large scar running down her sternum. He planted light kisses and nips along it, earning her confusion as he continuously moved lower. She watched as he nipped along the skin of her stomach, the corner of her mouth twitching as he seemingly, almost playfully, gently bit the piercing in her belly and glanced up at her. She rolled her eye for a moment before he sent another current through the metals, and she let out a soft whimper. It wasn't until he let go and moved to kiss and bite around her hips and thighs that she realized, her head shooting up with slight panic as she felt his lips against the inside of her thigh.
"H-Hey-"
"Quiet Emmy." He purred, the tone of his voice making her freeze. She watched as he kissed the inside of her thigh once more, her head landing back against the cushion with a shuddering gasp as he bit along the sensitive skin. Her hand flew over her mouth as he moved closer to her core, whimpering as she felt his tongue gliding along the skin.
"K-Karl, wait-" she whimpered through her fingers, only to take in a sharp, gasping breath as she finally felt his tongue against her, moving slowly as if savoring her reactions.
She tried closing her legs, though found it nearly impossible due to his hands forcing them to stay where they were. She could almost feel the bruises form where his fingers pressed against the skin, though that feeling was second in her mind compared to the pleasured sparks up her spine with each movement of his tongue. She couldn't help as her hand left the sheets, finding its way to his head as he played with the small piercing through the bundle of nerves, sending small electric pulses through her body once more. She felt the vibration as he chuckled against her, gripping his hair with small gasps and whimpers as his tongue delved into the warmth. Her back arched slightly with each movement, her thighs shaking from the new sensations. Why did it feel so good...?! She let out a long whine as the electric pulses continued, eventually biting down on her hand as to attempt to prevent any further noises. She could feel the tightness return as his teeth grazed against the piercing, and suddenly her hand was gripping his hair in a fist as she came again, a multitude of muffled whines and mutterings of his name escaping her mouth while her back arched. She barely heard the grunt he gave as he was pressed against her, not even realizing as he was able to pull himself away.
She flinched as Heisenberg reached up to grab her wrist, her body shaking slightly as he managed to nudge her hand away. He ran a hand through his hair to smooth it out, rising to loom over her once more as he licked his lips. Where the actual FUCK did he learn that?!
"That hurt, Emmy." He purred, keeping his grip on her wrist as she finally looked at him. Her face was red as she panted, her legs trembling as they rested against his hips once more. "Good girl."
He smirked as she stared up at him, his tongue swiping over his teeth before he leaned over and yanked her other wrist from her mouth, pinning both of them to the cushion beside her head. Her breath caught in her throat at the sudden movement, her eye widening as it met his. There was a moment of silence as they held a stare down, only ending as he shifted her wrists into one hand and used the other to undo the belt and button of his own pants in one swift motion. It took her a moment to register the movement, keeping eye contact once the full realization of just how far- and how fast- this was about to go hit her. She squirmed slightly in his grip as she glanced down, nearly breaking said grip, only to get caught in yet another rough kiss as she felt something warm press against her thighs. She could taste herself on his tongue, and somehow it made her arousal worse...
She let out a whining groan as she was rubbed against, her back arching once more at the new feeling, only to give a surprised and somewhat pained cry against his lips as she felt him enter her quickly and fully with a grunt. She gasped into the kiss as he returned his hand to her neck, her back arching into his chest and her thighs once again tightening around his waist. More of the pleasurable feeling shot up her spine as he moved a few times, pressing against her roughly as she gave small whimpers and whines. It felt... good... so good. Why did it feel good? Why did all of this just feel GOOD? What the hell was she missing from her old life that didn't include THIS?? She couldn't help the small moan she gave as the kiss was broken, and he shoved his hips against hers. He tightened his fingers around the sides of her neck with a sly smirk as he stayed where he was. Although the glint in his eyes may have looked malicious, his actions proved otherwise as he allowed her a few seconds to relax.
"Am I being too rough with you, Emmy?" He asked, his smirk widening into a grin as she mindlessly shook her head, though it was more like a few twitches.
"N-... No... N-Not rough enough..." she growled with a challenging tone, though her voice was still light. She was met with a dangerous chuckle.
"Good."
Emelia glared up at him with a somewhat clouded eye, her breaths coming in light pants that turned into gasps and moans as his movements continued, growing faster and harder with each passing second. She struggled to keep her voice down despite the feeling of each thrust sending sparks into her chest. The sounds of his low grunts and deep breathing weren't helping, she found, and it made it much more difficult to control her own pleasured noises. She was then aware of a low laugh from him.
"Ah... I didn't think... you could sound like THIS, Emmy...~" He purred, his grip on her neck tightening. She opened her mouth, nearly flinching as she let out more soft moans.
"S-... S-Shut...." she tried, though was unable to finish any thought with her gasps and whines.
Her arms struggled in his grip, shaking with each thrust, only to suddenly be freed as he let go in order to take ahold one of her hips. She mindlessly reached for him almost immediately, gripping the edge of his shirt with one hand and grabbing the necklaces around his neck with the other in order to yank him down. She was rewarded with another rough kiss, her head being jerked up as he kept a hand around her throat. She let go of the necklaces, instead reaching under his shirt, her fingers trailing over his own scars until her nails dug into his back. There was an internal satisfaction as she heard Heisenberg give a surprised grunt, only to give a yelping cry as he suddenly pulled away to replace his hand around her neck with his teeth.
Small sparks of pain made their way through her shoulder as his teeth broke the skin, though they seemed to amplify the feeling as the thrusts became rough and quick. She finally reached her other hand around and under the shirt he wore, her nails dragging down the skin of his back as her moans and whines grew louder.
"F-... FuCK...! K-Karl...!!" She said suddenly, her voice cracking somewhat as she was met with a possessive growl and the slight smell of fresh blood as he let go of her neck. She couldn't help but gasp as she felt his cheek against hers, his beard scratching against her skin as his lips nearly against her ear.
"You're MINE, Emelia..." He growled.
Emelia felt as more pulsing currents were sent through her piercings, and she couldn't help but cry out as the pulses caught her by surprise. Her muscles tensed, her nails tearing at Heisenbergs back as she felt the waves of a strong orgasm, making her body shake and her legs flex around his waist. Her thighs tightened at his hips, halting him enough to keep him where he was as she came, but not long enough to stop him entirely. He let out a low growl as he kept up his movements until he slammed against her hard enough to move her up a few inches. She gave a gasping moan as could feel his muscles shudder and a strange warmth in the pit of her stomach as he filled her, and her back arched against his chest as she nearly hugged him to her for dear life.
There was small silence as their movement ceased, each breathing heavily. Emelia held onto the man over her as if it meant life or death, momentarily forgetting her irritation around him in the first place as there was a sudden feel of lips along her neck in a multitude of small kisses. They were gentle against her bruised skin... The odd tickle of the facial hair made the corner of her mouth twitch as she panted, unintentionally laying her head to the side for him as she very slowly but surely relaxed. Her irritation only slightly returned as she heard a chuckle from her neck, and she glanced down.
"Th' bloody hell is so funny...?" She muttered, unable to keep the lightness from her voice. She watched as he looked up from her neck, a sly smile across his still bloody lips.
"You're adorable, Emmy." He said simply, making her groan and start to push him away.
"Piss off...!!" She growled, only to gasp as he suddenly leaned over her with a chuckle, nearly being pushed into the mattress again as he finally slipped off the button-up shirt.
"Precious little doll, you didn't seem to hear what I said."
'Doll' ...? Emelia stared at him, now also shirtless, taking in the rest of the scars she had never seen. She could feel her face heat up more as he leaned over her, holding himself up with his hands on either side of her shoulders.
"Wha-" she started, only to let out a gasping yelp as he gave a single hard thrust to silence her.
"I told you, Emelia. You're mine. In more ways than one, it seems." He nearly purred, leaning down to press his nose to hers.
Her single eye widened as he grinned, only to be met with a quick, relatively gentle kiss. It took a moment for her to calm down before she returned it, staying where she was and secretly holding herself to that proclamation. She didn't want to admit it... She never would. But somehow, despite how he could be, this made her feel... wanted. It was an odd feeling, and one she knew she would be hesitant on getting used to. But she still hated him... Right?
She gave a soft whine as he pulled away, physically removing himself from her with a shuddering breath. She let out a whimper as she relaxed back against the covers, feeling an odd coldness and even a slight sense of loneliness as his weight left the mattress. She opened her eye with confusion and watched as his pants were fixed before her vision trailed up his back to see the bloody scratches she had left.
"Whoops..." she muttered, earning a chuckle and a glance back.
"I'll let you relax for now, Emmy. I don't wanna break you just yet..." He joked, nodding to the shirt he had left. "Use that for now, we'll get you another shirt later."
She couldn't help but smirk, her face red.
"Done already...?" She asked, her smirk faltering heavily as he glanced back with an odd mischievous glint in his eyes.
"Never said I was, Doll. This is for your sake."
Emelia watched as he began to walk to the jacket he had left, but she felt... sad. Not because he had stopped. Not even because she almost wished they would keep going immediately... No, it was another reason she couldn't quite place with every step away he took. She carefully pushed herself to sit up, wincing at the tenderness that settled between her legs before reaching for her discarded jumpsuit. But she only grabbed the simple boxers she had, managing to slip them on with minimal issue. She saw him slow his movements as she managed to stand, her knees just the slightest bit weak. Holding on to a support beam on the wall, she shakily made her way over to him as he glanced at her with an odd curiosity. She didn't care if she was entirely naked save for underwear, simply covering her chest with her arm as she reached for him. She stumbled into his back, feeling his muscles tense as her arms slowly wrapped around his torso, her fingers lightly drifting along the hair and scars on his chest.
"Don't you dare leave me like this, Heisenberg..." she muttered, pressing the scarred half of her face against his back. She knew he could feel her trembling as her legs threatened to collapse on her.
There was a moment of silence before she heard and felt him chuckle.
"You really are an odd one, Emmy..." He chuckled, turning his head to glance at her over his shoulder before giving a dramatic sigh. "Have it your way, then."
Emelia jumped as he suddenly turned in her arms, her cheeks going red as his face was suddenly mere inches away from hers. What was she DOING? Why she acting this way? She didn't know... But she was pleasantly stunned as she felt his hand raise and nudge her chin gently. However, instead of it going around her neck again as she expected, he simply caressed her cheek, avoiding the scars around her missing eye; Even he knew she hated them being touched, and now didn't seem like the best time to annoy her. In fact, he almost enjoyed her more when she was calm like this... She couldn't help but feel relaxed as the rough pad of his thumb brushed over her skin. Relaxed enough to settle her cheek into his hand fully, ever so slightly trying to remind herself that this wasn't who he was all the time. This was temporary... But she could do temporary.
"... Don't tell anyone..." She muttered suddenly, keeping her hold on him as he leaned back against the shelving next to them to stay comfy. He chuckled once more.
"Who do I have to tell, Emmy?" He chimed. She stared at him for a moment before shrugging, laying her head against his chest.
It was a moment of domesticity that she vaguely remembered wanting as human... Something about someone being close physically always seemed tantalizing, yet there was no way to achieve it here... Or so she thought. If she could just have more time like this... Though she knew it wasn't meant to last, especially not with him... But for now, she appreciated it. It wasn't until her senses focused on the machinery noises outside of the room that she gave a sigh, reluctantly pulling away from him.
"I should get back to work, then..." she mumbled, taking a few steps away, her fingers dragging along his chest before she turned, not seeing Heisenbergs face as he watched her walk away and run a hand through her hair to push it out of her face.
She made her way over back to the bed-like cushion, absent-mindedly picking the button-up shirt he had been wearing and slipping it on, herself. She'd take it since he offered, and because she didn't necessarily feel like hunting down new clothing. It was only slightly loose over her frame, being only slightly smaller than him in stature, and she felt his eyes burrow into her back as she buttoned it up. Quiet footsteps approached her from behind, causing her to jump with a small gasp as arms surrounded her while the shirt was only halfway buttoned. Heisenberg pulled her back against his chest, one hand on her hip and the other around the front of her waist.
"What are you-" she started, only to stop as the arm around her waist raised to nudge the collar of the shirt off her shoulder, placing gentle bites and kisses along the skin as soon as it was shown. Small shivers went up her spine with the movements, and she let out a wavering breath in attempts to not laugh from the tickling of his beard. "K-Karl, stop-"
"I never told you to get back to work..." He said simply, his now semi-serious tone interrupting he train of thought and causing any hint of laughter to disappear. He trailed kisses and bites to her jaw and her ear once more. "Indulge me then, Emmy, and I'll let you go. Let me have my fill."
Her face fell slightly. His fill... Did he mean...?
"W-What, be your toy until you're done?" She huffed, turning her head slightly to face him. Though he was on her blind side, she could almost feel the grin.
"Well, when you put it that way..." he started, letting his hands wander. One trailed under the shirt slightly, his fingers drifting below her belly, while the other found and gave a gentle squeeze to a now exposed breast from the shirt being moved before resting over the large scar. "Yes. But don't worry. I take care of my toys... I said I wouldn't break you so soon. And besides..." he pressed another gentle kiss behind her ear, "You seem like you want more. Am I wrong?"
Emelia took a shaky breath as she felt the odd sensations once more, reaching to hold onto his forearms as his hands moved. Well, of COURSE he was right... She knew there wasn't much else she would have to do around the factory today anyway. She worked constantly, and the factory ran relatively smoothly without her. She even came here for a break, anyway... And, despite her feelings about him, what the man had just shown her was... Well, her legs still held a slight wobble. To say she wanted more was an understatement. And so, she have a small huff and looked forward, tilting her head to allow him at her neck.
"... Go ahead..." she muttered, her voice an embarrassed tone. She felt his grin against her neck taking a breath as he gave a small, rough bite.
"You won't regret it, Emmy."
She gave a small, joking snort.
"I'll believe you if you can prove it, Karl..."
"Oh, even after what I've just shown you?" He played, his lips pressing to her neck once more. She said nothing, only somewhat easing against his chest with a huff. She rolled her eye as he chuckled, though her breath caught in her chest as his hand left the scar, letting his fingers trail up and along her throat. "I didn't think I would have to prove anything."
"You never do..." she muttered suddenly, only to close her mouth as she felt him freeze behind her. Where the hell did that come from...??
"Oh?"
She was silent for a moment before clearing her throat.
"Th-That, ah..." she started, only stopping as he grabbed her throat and pulled her to him roughly.
"What?" He growled, ever so slightly moving them forward. She took shaky steps, following his direction.
"N-Not... what I... mean..." she finally managed, glancing down with a quick breath as she felt the edge of the work table against the front of her thighs.
"Hm. What did you mean then, Emmy?"
"I..." she tried, though was unable to find her voice. What was this rush of excitement...?? The tone of his voice sent chills down her spine as he nibbled at her shoulder while awaiting a response. She then decided to just speak. What could go wrong?
"I-I mean...." she managed, gaining a smirk and holding onto his arm. She could feel as he tilted his head in curiosity. "You haven't quite done so thus far, how am I to believe you could...?" she continued, feeling his grip tighten. Good. She pulled away from him slightly to aggravate him. "You always need to prove yourself Karl, you won't get far without it-"
She was stopped with a surprised grunt as she was suddenly shoved down against the table, giving a surprised grunt of pain as her chin hitting it with a light *thunk* . He kept his hand between her shoulders, using his weight to keep her down as she moved to rub her jaw. Her hand was then suddenly yanked away as he twisted her arm behind her back, earning an uncomfortable grunt.
"Bloody hell- H-hey-!"
"I don't give proof, huh?" He growled suddenly, leaning down over her to talk into her ear. "I assure you, Emelia, I have all the proof you need."
She opened her mouth to speak, only to shut it with a surprised noise as he suddenly bit down on her neck and yanked her towards him. The backs of her thighs hit his hips, and she let out a small, surprised whimper. He slipped his fingers under the waistline of her underwear with his free hand, taunting her by slowly dragging them down. There was a sudden spark at her piercings once more while her lower half squirmed, and she couldn't help but give a small, moaning whine as she felt the sparks increase. Waves of pleasure traveled up her spine, causing her back to arch into the table somewhat and nearly bite her bottom lip until it bled. Small goosebumps covered her skin as she felt her underwear finally fall to her ankles. It wasn't until she felt him adjust himself behind her that she attempted to look to the side, only to be met with a growl and his teeth digging into the skin more.
She could smell the blood as it began to seep from between her skin and his teeth... It made her head swim as she finally felt him rub against her roughly, the small sparks of pain from his teeth adding to the odd pleasure she was feeling. He removed his teeth from her neck for a moment to speak into her ear, sending more shivers down her spine.
"I've got your 'proof' right here." He purred, his smirk nearly audible. He shoved her down again once more. "HERE!!"
He gave a rough thrust forward as he spoke, filling her quickly once again and earning a yelping moan; but this time, he didn't stop. A mixture of pain and pleasure racked her body as he kept up the rough thrusts, simultaneously twisting her arm more behind her back to hold her there. She couldn't stop the now loud moans and whines she gave as she panted, nearly digging her nails into the metal table supporting her. She could feel the pulses of her muscles threatening to tighten and mutate as she was slammed into nearly mercilessly, her fingers creating small dents in the material as she forced her mutation back once she felt a familiar flutter in her chest. He seemed to notice, letting out a low chuckle through his own grunts and growls.
It wasn't long before she felt the sudden waves of an orgasm, making her give a loud cry as she shifted under him, pressing back against him for a moment. She reached forward quickly and gripped the edge of the table, easily denting and nearly crushing it in her grip with light cries as he continued his thrusts through the tightening spasms. Her body shook while he didn't slow down. Instead, he increased his movements, and she almost felt tears come to her eye with the overwhelming sensation.
Her other arm was suddenly freed as he moved to grip both of her hips, leaning down to bite at her shoulder once more with low grunts and growls. He kept going... Oh god, he kept going. She couldn't speak, the only noises leaving her throat being whines and cries. She couldn't help but lean into his jaw, almost begging him for more despite the overstimulation. Her neck was bitten multiple times as if she were being marked, each bite breaking the skin with ease. Beads of blood slowly dripped from the wounds and over her skin every time he let go, only to feel his teeth elsewhere. She felt tightness below her belly once more as she let out a wavering cry of his name, only to be met with slower thrusts and a growl at her ear.
"What do you want, Emelia?" He growled, his voice low and strained. She couldn't help but squirm and push back against him with whining whimpers as he slowed more, quickly becoming frustrated and seemingly desperate. No... No, why was he stopping... Why was he slowing down?!
"N-.. N-No...!! D-Don't- fuck- D-Don't slow-...!!" She managed, earning a dangerous chuckle.
"Tell me Emelia, or I swear to God I'll stop right NOW." He played. She could hear the smirk in his voice as he spoke. She knew this was amusing to him... It was payback for her insults. Her body shook out of desperation and anger as the thrusts slowed considerably, and she put her forehead against the table with a growling whine. He held her hips in place against the table to prevent her from moving against him. She couldn't take it anymore... She wouldn't even try to fight it. It was as if she were being denied a prize, and she hated it already.
"F-Fuck- I-" she started, barely able to get words out, "Y-YOU Heisenberg, you bloody idiot!!! I want YOU!!!" She finally yelled, her voice cracking somewhat. "J-Just... D-Don't... Don't FUCKING stop!!! Fuck- PLEASE!!"
She could almost feel the pride-filled smirk he gave in knowing he had won, but she didn’t care... Her little outburst gave her slight confidence as he chuckled, his last breath coming as a low growl.. She jumped as she suddenly felt an arm around her waist, roughly pulling her back towards him as his other hand reached to pin and hold hers as if keeping her in place. A wavering whine left her lips as he gave a possessive growl, looming over her with obvious intent.
"Good girl." He grumbled, only giving her a chance to inhale before returning to the powerful, near brutal thrusts from before, pulling her to him with each movement.
She didn't even attempt to hide her voice again, her cries and moans growing louder with each passing second. She almost didn't want the feeling to end, allowing herself to melt into him as her back arched into his chest.
"D-Don't... D-Don't stop... F-FUCK- Don't stop...!!!" She repeated, her voice wavering with uneven pants and gasps.
"You. Are. MINE." He suddenly growled in her ear, not letting her respond before biting into her shoulder once more.
More electric pulses were sent through her piercings, nearly making her scream while gripping the hand over hers. The orgasm she felt then was strong, traveling through her body in waves and overstimulation as the pulses continued. The feeling was amplified as he kept moving for a few seconds, finally pressing her roughly against the table with a loud, wavering growl and swear as he came as well. She let out another gasping moan as she felt him twitch inside of her, shuddering with the light warmth she felt at the pit of her stomach.
The room was filled with the sound of their panting and deep breaths as their rode their highs, and Emelia finally relaxed against the table with a shaky, satisfied sigh while still panting. She felt... good. Great, actually... Very sore now, as well as numb, but good nonetheless. It was as if any frustration she felt had melted away with the thin layer of sweat on her body. She gave a quiet whimper as she felt Heisenberg shift somewhat. He removed his jaws from her shoulder, nudging her head and pressing his cheek against hers as his grip on her loosened to allow her to relax more.
"Are you alright, Emmy?" He asked quietly, his voice low and catching her off guard enough to flinch. She only made a small, confused noise as she glanced over. He chuckled, catching a glimpse of the residual pleasured tears that stained her cheek. He reached over, dragging his thumb over her skin to wipe them away. "Is that a yes?"
She kept her eye on him for a moment before giving a small nod and setting her head back on the table. She attempted to shift, but found her body was... unable to move. The numbness had begun to turn into the feeling of being a puddle, she found. Her muscles shook as she tried to push herself up, and she almost collapsed under him. He nearly laughed while kept his grip on her waist, keeping her upright while he watched in interest.
"Would you like some help?"
"N... N-No, I..." she tried, her voice quiet. There was silence for a moment before she gave a shaky sigh, putting her head down once more in defeat. "... y-yes..."
"I thought so." He chuckled, finally pulling himself away with a quiet grunt. She could hear the amusement in his voice. "Alright. Keep steady, now."
Emelia glanced back as he partially adjusted himself, not bothering to fully fix his pants before he let go of her waist. A small panic entered her chest as her legs began to collapse under her, barely able to use the table to keep herself up before she felt him at her side. Her body shook as she tried to lean up once more, reaching to hold on to Heisenbergs arm as he draped it across her shoulders. He didn't even flinch as she leaned her full weight on him, and he chuckled.
"Come on, then." He said, suddenly leaning down once she was fully off the table. She let out a surprised yelp as he swept his other arm behind her knees, bringing her up into a cradling position against his chest as she held onto him tightly. She tightened her grip more as he started to walk, her face red. "Something wrong?" He asked, amusement thick in his voice. She watched his movements, only somewhat relaxing as they neared the bed.
"N-No..." she replied quietly, slowly easing herself in a sitting position the tattered covers as he set her down, wincing again at the soreness she felt. While the fabrics weren't always the best for relaxing, right now they were comforting, and a godsend for her shaking muscles. She then jumped as he sat down himself before he laid beside her with a huff. She stared at him for a moment as he held his arm out for her. What was he doing...?
"Well?" He asked expectantly, raising a brow as she looked confused.
"... what?"
He rolled his eyes.
"You're wearing my shirt Emmy, the least you could do is lay down."
"What-" she started, only to look down. "O-Oh... um..." She had admittedly forgotten what she had been wearing, and sheepishly pulled the shirt over her now throbbing shoulders and neck. She then adjusted herself on the mattress with a quiet grunt. "Ok..."
"NOW you're embarrassed??" He asked, nudging her arm slightly. "Should I describe, in detail, what I just did to you?"
She glared at him and gave a small huff as she managed to lay down.
"Shut up..." she mumbled, somewhat begrudgingly cuddling onto his chest as he smirked.
"It was an honest question."
Emelia only grumbled in response, though relaxed as she felt his arm go around her. She adjusted her head on his chest, pausing as she felt a heartbeat. It was slow and rhythmic, lulling her into a relaxed breathing pattern. He glanced at her as her arm wrapped over his chest as well, though he froze as she mindlessly began to trace over some of the smaller scars over his skin. She watched her own fingers move, an amused smile creeping on her face as she felt him tense and relax at her touch. She tilted her head slightly as she heard a light grumbling from his chest, her fingers pausing. He shifted under her, and she looked up to meet his eyes.
"What...?" She asked, resuming the movements. She watched as his eyes traveled between her and her fingers multiple times, his breathing easy with small grumbles in each inhale.
"Nothing." He replied simply, only to lift his chin slightly in confusion as she moved her hand to the scar across his neck. She felt his breath hitch as she traced it, and he looked at her again. "What are you doing, Emmy?"
"Nothing." She copied, almost laughing as he rolled his eyes.
"Don't get soft on me now Emelia, just earlier you were threatening me." He snorted.
"I still can if you would rather that."
"Hm. No, I'd rather fuck you again."
She went silent for a moment, her face heating up once more with embarrassment. "You said you wouldn't break me." She huffed.
Heisenberg gave a chuckle before turning to face her, gaining a smirk when she looked at him in surprise.
"I won't. I can't, actually." He said matter-of-factly, suddenly pushing her shoulder to have her lay on her back. She jumped, staring up at him in a stunned silence. "That doesn't mean I can't try. I haven't had that much fun in years, and I know you're durable. So am I."
"I-I can tell..." Emelia managed, clearing her throat slightly. Well, she knew he had a point... Despite being sore, she still felt oddly energized... Sure, the light exhaustion was there, but she knew she would have gone back to work immediately if she were physically able to. And she had to admit... She enjoyed this. It felt... normal. Almost.
She kept her eye on him for a moment before taking a breath. Was she really debating on this? The reality of the current situation hit her full force like Sturm on a rampage. She was silent for another moment before gulping slightly.
"What... What is... 'this' , exactly...?" she asked, her voice quiet. Karl drew back slightly, caught off guard by the question.
"Excuse me...??"
"I... You... You piss me off, Heisenberg..." she started, her arms resting at the sides of her head. Each movement of her shoulders resulted in a dull pain from his teeth, and his mouth twitched as he realized. She paused as she saw the smallest... tiniest twinge of regret in his eyes. But she shook her head, looking down at herself.
"I don't... I've been here for... only a short time compared to you, Karl... And now I... We do... THIS..." she continued, looking back up at him as he held his place over her. "What are we doing...?"
It was his turn to stay silent, obviously contemplating his answer. She had seen the same look on his face when discussing important factory matters... It almost made her feel better.
"What do you want from it?" He asked finally, tilting his head with a light shrug. She blinked.
"... What?"
He rolled his eyes, giving a small smirk.
"Ah, who's asking the hard questions now?" He played, chuckling as she glared at him. "I don't quite care what this leads to, I know what my goals are." He explained. "What are yours? What do YOU want out of it?"
"I..." she started, looking to the side. "... I don't know."
"Then don't worry about it!"
"But I-"
"Look, Emelia. If you can't figure it out, then focus on something else. Is it really worth wasting the energy if you don't know right away?" He asked.
She was silent. He... He was right.
"That... That's the most intelligent thing I've ever heard you say."
She nearly laughed at his insulted expression.
"Hey-"
"I'm joking, Metalhead..." She sighed with a small smile. There was silence for a moment before she finally gave a huff. "Just... For now just..."
"Come on, we don't have all day." Heisenberg joked, smirking as she glared at him.
"... Shut up you daft idiot." She growled finally, reaching to yank him down by his necklaces.
The movement startled him, but he seemed to know exactly what to do as his lips met hers with a light chuckle. The kiss was... gentle, oddly enough, but she relaxed once more under him. Light shivers traveled up her spine as she felt his fingers travel along her skin. The shirt was fully unbuttoned once again and nudged to her sides, and she took a deep breath as she felt the air on her chest. She only whined as her legs were moved, making him pause. There was a soreness between them from his roughness beforehand, sending small waves of a low, pulsing pain through her body. He gave a questioning hum against her lips, and she spoke against his.
"Sore..." she admitted quietly, feeling his amused smile.
"Good." He replied simply, adjusting himself and his pants to rest between her thighs. Emelia let out a quiet whimper as she was rubbed against, her legs shaking against his hips and her arms reaching out to his onto and wrap around his shoulders.
The dull throbbing sensation continued as he pushed into her once more, earning a somewhat pained whine as her back arched. It hurt... But the feeling lessened to a light sting after a few seconds, and she took lighter breaths. She couldn't help but wonder as he stayed still, his words and question playing in her mind as he returned to his position of leaning on his forearms over her. What DID she want from this...? Did she truly wish for any sort of stability from this? Or just survival? Maybe this was the first and last time she'd experience this, or maybe it would be regular. Did she WANT it to be regular, though? She didn't know... All she knew was that his touch swung wildly between rough and gentle every time he touched her, even before this. He always switched between harsher interactions and kind ones, making her angry and thankful at the same time. And yet, when he touched her NOW... Even while over the table, it was almost careful, hesitant to push her too far even while leaving bruises in her skin. Somehow, while sharing this intimacy, he was a perfect mix of the two. And somehow, it calmed her and even gave a small hope in the back of her mind.
Her thoughts stopped, letting out a breathy moan into the kiss as he started moving, this time at a slow pace. This time she kept her arms around him, hugging him close enough for their bare chests to press against each other. Her breaths and moans came from a different sort of pleasure, almost willing to believe that sharing this with him would allow some sort of normalcy. Her nails dug into his shoulders as he set a careful, hard rhythm, one of his arms moving down to press his hand against her stomach.
A single second passed before Heisenberg sent a low pulse of electricity through her body and piercings, causing her back to arch as she pulled away from the kiss with a gasping whine. She felt as he lowered his head with a low groan, starting to kiss and nibble along her jaw. Her nails dug into his back as his movements increased somewhat, creating more scratches to match the ones he already had. Her voice came out in quiet whines and moans into his ear as she clung to him. Sure this was making the soreness worse, but she almost couldn't tell between the low pulses and thrusts coming from the man. Her body shook while simultaneously encouraging more. She WANTED more... She already admitted as much to herself. Another whine escaped her lips as he nibbled just below her ear.
"Fuck, Emmy...~" he nearly purred into her ear, lifting her hips slightly and switching to smaller quick thrusts.
"K-... K-Karl-! F-FUCK-" she managed, her voice breaking somewhat as she allowed her legs to loosen at his sides to bring him closer. She whimpered as he suddenly leaned up, her nails digging and sliding down to his biceps before gripping them as she felt a familiar tightness below her belly; he could feel it, too.
Emelia suddenly held her breath in a surprised, wavering gasp as he slid his hand up her body from the belly piercing, his fingers dragging along the large scar on her chest before lingering and pressing against the sides of her neck. Her whines and moans continued, even as his hand moved higher to her jaw. She then jumped as his thumb pushed past her parted lips, resting on her tongue. She attempted to look up at him, but found it difficult to even keep her eye open... Heisenberg gave a low chuckle at the sight, pushing on her jaw slightly. He didn't even have to say a word as her mouth nearly closed around his thumb. Her whines and whimpers grew louder and her grip on him tightened, and she could only gasp as he pulled his thumb from her mouth and replaced it with his own.
The kiss was returned instantaneously, followed by her wavering, now muffled cry as she finally came once more. He grunted into the kiss as she tightened around him, her legs wrapping around his waist once more while her back arched. She wrapped her arms fully around his shoulders with overstimulated whines as his pace quickened before he finally let out his own wavering moan against her lips. She joined him with her own moan as he shoved his hips against hers, feeling the warmth enter her as he rode out his own orgasm with shaking muscles. God, it felt... It felt good... The warmth and twitching from him kept her whines going as they panted, her body shaking under him.
Both were silent for several moments, the kiss lessening to gentle movements before breaking.
"D-... D-Damn..." Emelia nearly squeaked, her head rolling to the side as her jaw was nuzzled.
"Hm. Are you alright?" Heisenberg asked, earning a small nod.
"... gonna be sore..." she replied quietly, relaxing somewhat as he kept his face against hers. He chuckled.
"You wanted it."
"Shush..." she huffed. Her breathing eased, feeling his smile against her skin. This was... Nice, she had to admit... An uncomfortable whine left her lips as he began to push himself up and away, only pausing as her legs twitched around him to keep him there. "N-No... stay..." she whined, watching as he raised a brow. "... P-Please..."
"I've never heard you say 'please' this much." He joked, earning a light glare. But he simply returned to his place over her with an amused chuckle, nearly laying on her.
She was relaxed despite nearly his entire weight on her torso, though she had no issues. He was really warm... She could almost purr with the warmth both on top of and inside her, the feeling relaxing her to the point of her limbs going lax around him. She felt him chuckle against her skin, taking a breath as his lips found her bruised neck. But her mind wandered elsewhere, and she found herself pressing her cheek to his.
"Can we... Not talk about this...?" She asked quietly, earning a confused hum as he glanced at her.
"Oh? What do you mean?"
"J-Just... Um..." she tried, turning her head to look at him. "M-Maybe this could be... just... stress relief...?"
She jumped as Heisenberg shifted, his face now hovering over hers with their noses together.
"Just stress relief?" He asked, amusement dancing in his eyes as her face reddened. "Is that what you want?"
She simply nodded, her fingers traveling over small scars that covered his upper back and shoulders. 'For now...' she thought. Wait, 'for now'...?? Did she really mean that...? She was pulled out of her thoughts as he pressed a quick kiss to her forehead.
"Then so be it." Heisenberg said simply, meeting her gaze. She stared up at him before nodding and taking a breath. But he moved before she had a chance to even think, wrapping his arm around her waist. "Hold on."
"What-" she tried, only to cling to him with a surprised yelp as he pushed against the mattress to lean up with her against his chest. She let out a light whine as she was shifted on him, small sparks shooting up her spine as she was settled against his hips while he sat and leaned back against the wall. He couldn't help but smirk as she let out a whimper, her legs twitching. "Better?"
"I..." she tried, though couldn't manage words as she felt him shift against her to make himself comfortable. So she simply nodded before leaning against his chest.
It was his turn to freeze as she nuzzled to his neck, giving a pleased sigh as his arms hesitantly went around her waist. She relaxed against him, enjoying the warmth he gave and the feeling of his arms around her.
"... You're warm..." she said quietly, earning a surprised chuckle.
"I would almost hope so." He replied, reaching up and under the shirt she still wore to drag his fingers along small scars on her back. He smiled as she relaxed. "I'm going to assume you're not moving any time soon?"
He nearly laughed as she nodded against his shoulder.
"Fair assumption..." she mumbled, closing her eye.
While she wasn't necessarily tired, there was a sliver of exhaustion in her chest. She had to admit, there was still pain from the bite marks that now covered her neck and shoulders, and the soreness of her legs came as a dull throbbing. But she oddly didn't mind... She held her breath as she realized her enjoyment of this. The touches, the intimacy... Even the dull pains she felt. Maybe she didn't even mind HIM...
No, no... She DID mind him. Did she...? She still found him infuriating... But the way he held her now was... Well, it made her question quite a bit.
She finally sighed, relaxing fully against him. She focused on his touches against her back instead of the thoughts in her mind, willfully ignoring them for once. She'd enjoy what she had for now... Her attention went to the sounds of his heart and distant machinery, letting them lull her into a light sleep. She didn't NEED she sleep at the moment, but to her, it was almost perfect.
She only hoped it would stay that way.
#oc#resident evil#resident evil oc#resident evil village#resident evil village fanfiction#resident evil village oc#re8oc#re8#heisenberg#karl heisenberg#karl heisenberg x oc#heisenberg x oc#karl heisenberg smut#lord heisenberg#smut#lovelywingsocs#LovelyWings Writes#Metalworks Fanfiction#heisenberg fanfiction
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Blurb #2 (T.H.)
a/n: so, i don’t know what or how this happened but *throws fic* here ya go!! *runs and hides in a hole* *peeks back out* enjoy!!
pairing: tom holland x female!reader
summary: Tom jet skiing is just too hot for you to handle and it's making you feel certain emotions. So, you take matters into your own hands... somewhat literally.
warnings: written fairly quick (so might be shitty), alludes to smut (make out in the bathroom and then some...kinda lol), typos I might have missed (slightly proofread) and oh, the pictures.
word count: 1.1k+ (it’s a short one! a miracle! alsklaks)
masterlist in bio & pinned post
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You knew from the moment he picked those shorts to wear that this was going to be dangerous. Then again, you didn't do much to prevent him from wearing it either because your man looks good in them, how can you complain?
But then, he got into the wetsuit. That was when it took all your strength to try and be calm about it, to seem unaffected as you got on the jet ski right behind him. And as you rode into the stretch of the ocean, it became much harder to take control of this fiery feeling inside you. There was just something so attractive with the way he took absolute control of the roaring engine, somewhat taming the beast in the way he maneuvered his way across the waves. Not to mention the feeling of his muscles flexing underneath the tight fabric, your fingers unable to escape them given that you have no choice but to hold onto him.
You do take pride in your sense of control, so you've managed to get off the jet ski and smile sweetly, innocently at your boyfriend, expression a stark contrast to the absolute filth that's swimming in your mind.
It was when he took the wetsuit off did you finally decide that the agony was enough. Your patience has been stretched too thin as you watched him walk under the sun, his wet hair shining, making his curls look even more gorgeous. And with the way the ocean water coated his body, he was glowing underneath the rays, his muscles more defined from his arms, to his broad shoulders, his toned chest, and then those abs, gosh those abs that you could never get enough of. Plus, with how those evil shorts were hanging too low at his hips, his v-line was showing just enough that it had you wanting more of what was hidden in between. Put all of those together and my goodness did he look like an absolute Greek god, one who you wanted to get a taste of.
"Tom? Can you help me with the zip for a sec? I think it's stuck," you called out after your boyfriend who was waiting for you just on the other side of the bathroom door. Your words were a huge lie given that you were already out of your wetsuit, you just needed him inside without raising much suspicion.
Once you unlocked the door, Tom slipped inside, confusion covering his face when he saw you already in your swimwear. Though you didn't give him much time to think as you swiftly pushed him back against the nearby wall, your lips on his in a split second, Tom kissing back not long after as he wrapped his arms around your waist tightly.
Your fingers were touching him all over, deliberately feeling his muscles, running them down from his broad shoulders to his biceps, giving them a squeeze making Tom chuckle softly. Then you went further down, playing with the garter of his shorts for a couple teasing seconds before you went slowly back up, warm palms flat against his abs to his toned chest, fingers snaking up his neck and then tangling them in his damp curls. You earned a gasp from him when you tugged on them hotly, your tongue slipping inside his mouth without further hesitation. Albeit a familiar one, both your heads were spinning at the taste, soft moans filling the air as your tongues meet.
"Very sneaky," Tom chuckled lowly against the kiss, wide smirk in full play, his hands going to squeeze at the swell of your bum as he tries to keep up with the absolute fervour in your kiss. He would be lying if he said he didn't notice the way you looked at him. Other than the fact that Tom knows you, he's always focused on you, so of course he noticed and yes, he loved it. "Could've just told me you wanted to—oh," Tom cuts himself off with a gasp at the sudden feeling of your palm pressed up against the tent on his shorts, his hands that were rested on your bum tightening around the flesh in the process.
"Fuck," he breathed out, head thrown back to give your more access as you now moved your kisses down to his neck, sucking on his sweet spots just lightly, careful not to leave any marks. You pulled away for a second to meet his eyes, Tom giving you a nod of consent before you hooked your fingers on his shorts and pulled them down just as you slowly lowered yourself down his body, littering hungry kisses on his chest, his abs and then that luscious v-line.
"Fucking hell," Tom hissed as your nimble fingers wrapped around the base, his eyes screwing shut for a second, lavishing the feeling before he slowly looked down at you to meet your lust-filled gaze.
Tom shook his head in pure awe, brown orbs coated with admiration but also glowing with lust at the sight of you gorgeous on your knees. Then you looked up at him with a sweet, adorable smile, head tilted to the side innocently, but then your eyes, the absolute mischief and devilish look in your beautiful eyes, Tom felt like he was about to bust right then and there. And then you spoke,
"Now, you're going to have to be quiet for me pretty boy."
Tom nodded frantically with a shaky breath, bottom lip quick to get caught between his teeth as he tried to suppress a low, guttural moan once he felt the slickness and warmth of your tongue.
***
"What took you guys so long?" Harry asked as you and Tom walked towards the group hand in hand and wide smiles on both your faces.
With his cheeks turning more flushed, Tom cleared his throat. "The tie of her swimsuit got stuck in the zip," he said, shrugging nonchalantly while you tried your best to bit back a grin, laying your head on his shoulder innocently.
The group only nodded without care, now slowly making their way back to the cars. "You guys want to get some food?" Harry spoke towards everyone.
"I don't know, I think I'm already full," you hummed against Tom's ear only, a shiver running down his spine at the soft purr in your voice. When he met your gaze, you only shot him a playful wink, your smile too mischievous that it was hard for him to seem unaffected since that certain smile was quick to remind him what happened just minutes prior. Which wouldn't exactly be ideal for he can't really hide it in the shorts.
With a squeeze of your hand and a discreet warning glare, Tom silently urged you to behave. At least, until you get back to the hotel. Then he'll let you be as devilish as you want to be.
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like, reblog & leave a comment if you liked it and tell me your thoughts <3
♛ Overall/Everything Taglist: @theunwantedomega @vinylmendes @fallinfortom @disneysamara @avengersficwriter @musicalkeys @apatheticanvas67482
♛ Tom H. Taglist: @hollandfanficlove @averyfosterthoughts @2018shawn @darlingspidey @namoreno @spacebitch2 @hollanddolanfangirl @keepingupwiththehollands @in-a-lot-of-fandoms-tbh @unbelievableholland @kittenruby @sunkisseddreamer @worldoftom @quaksonhehe @big-galaxy-chaos @clara-licht @dummiesshort @imanativeofswlondondahling @sonofabitchstyles @perspectiveparker @chloecreatesfictions @tombob2005 @arivera-30
just let me know if you want to be removed from the taglist hun! <3
#tom holland#thomas stanley holland#tom holland fanfiction#tom holland imagine#tom holland one shot#tom holland writing#tom holland reader insert#tom holland imagines#tom holland oneshot#tom holland oneshots#tom holland stories#tom holland short stories#tom holland smut#tom holland drabble#tom holland fic#tom holland fics#tom holland fanfic#tom holland fluff#tom holland x reader#tom holland x you#tom holland x y/n#tom holland x fem!reader#tom holland blurb#my writing
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Meta Essay: Medivh The Bisexual Icon
As of the time of this post, there’s going to be an update coming to World of Warcraft where the once all female ghosts in Karazhan will be changed to include male varieties as well.
Full details on the update can be found here:
https://www.wowhead.com/news/female-only-ghosts-in-karazhan-updated-to-include-male-versions-324371
This has caused a lot of fun posts and people to take this as an ‘accidental confirmation’ by Blizzard that the character Medivh is bisexual. Pair this along with how some of his portrayal in Hearthstone was made into Warcraft canon, and in my opinion, it’s an excellent update to his character.
It’s no secret that Blizzard’s had a massive lack in LBGTQ+ representation for the longest time. Often when such subject matter did show up it was treated more as a punchline in some quests or was kept conveniently to the sidelines, with nonconsequential, blink and you miss it text, side characters, moments. It’s insulting, to say the least, and is the source of a growing frustration from the LBGTQ+ members of the audience. What’s more, whenever this frustration gets voiced it’s always talked down to. We are told that to ‘keep politics out of gaming’ and that we are too sensitive, when these are the same people that get bent out of shape when even a single thing changes or is called out in their game. It’s bullshit. LBGTQ+ people exist and the act of existing isn’t a political issue.
But of course, with people even making lighthearted jokes or posts of Medivh being a ‘Bisexual Icon’, there’s folks crawling out of the woodwork with reasons from “But the loooooooore!” (as if the lore isn’t constantly changing and being retconned from one expansion to the next) to “Well A-C-T-U-A-L-L-Y, those male guests were just for the female nobles that visited and attended his parties, Medivh was very straight”. To that, I’m going to say: “Nah, Medivh is a bisexual icon, deal with it”.
In my personal opinion, Medivh is an excellent character to explore queerness with. He’s a character that’s been around since Warcraft 1 and the effects and ties from his story are still felt throughout World of Warcraft in various ways. Medivh is also a character that’s gone through a large amount of evolution and various portrayals. My personal favorite being the One Night in Karazhan take on him because it’s so different from the usual ‘brooding, grand powerful hermit-mage’ that his type of character usually is. Medivh in One Night in Karazhan is instead, vibrant and is a thriving social butterfly that loves to have and treat people to a good time. His reasonings for being this way make a lot more sense when you really think about what Medivh’s situation was.
Now, I have to mention that I do a much deeper dive and deconstruction of Medivh’s circumstances and just how messed up they were in this self indulgent essay/headcanon dump: ‘My Completely Self-indulgent Medivh Essay’. Feel free to give it a read but here is the basic gist for this essay:
Yes, Medivh was the Guardian, one of the most powerful mages to exist at the time. He was also possessed by Sargeras and was the one that created and opened the Dark Portal that brought the Orcs to Azaroth and changed Azeroth forever. But here’s the thing, Medivh had no choice in any of it.
To be the Guardian means you have to put your life on the line for Azeroth’s sake. This is a role that had to be kept to secrecy, people had to make a lot of sacrifices to be the Guardian. You gain phenomenal powers and it is a great honor but none of this was anything that Medivh ever asked for. He was literally born to become the Guardian, there was no other choice for his own future.
Then you have Sargeras, he had his plans in play long before Medivh was even a thought. A sliver of Sargeras had entered Aegwynn (Med’s mother and the Guardian before him) from a battle between Aegwynn and his avatar. This influence hid within her and made its move when she decided that she wasn’t going to allow the Council of Tirisfal to choose her heir for her title and powers for her. Ignoring Chronicle’s softening of her, she used Medivh’s father, Neilas Aran, the court magician of Stormwind to sire a child. In TLG she let him know she flat out used him and felt nothing for him then came back later and tossed baby Medivh to him for free childcare. What neither of them knew at the time was that Medivh was possessed by Sargeras while he was in the womb. Sargeras would then screw him over even further by causing his powers to lash out when he was fourteen, causing him to accidentally kill his father and fall into a near 10 year coma, and wake up mentally and emotionally fourteen in a twenty-three-year-old’s body. So from the very beginning Medivh was always set up for failure.
So with this summary out of the way, the point of the matter is that Medivh is a character that had little autonomy for most of his life. His career and his fate were chosen for him from the start. Sargeras was in his head messing with him throughout his life, in TLG Medivh even tells Khadgar that he tried to fight it as much as he could. His story is a tragic one but with his reappearance in Legion there’s potentially a ray of hope.
I think there’s a lot of aspects in Medivh’s story that can tie well with the feelings and experiences of queerness. Not so much the being possessed by discount space Satan, but more so the struggle of trying to have autonomy and hanging onto who you are as a person. Being queer myself and looking at it through that lens, I see Medivh being vibrant and throwing parties as an attempt for him to seize what autonomy he could for himself. To exist, to be seen, and to have an identity of his own that had nothing to do with being the Guardian of Tirisfal. I think that it’s also something that separates Medivh from Sargeras. There were likely times where Sargeras may have forced the lines between them to blur as he gradually poisoned Medivh’s thoughts and twisted his soul throughout the years. Medivh likely had to struggle a lot with separating who he truly was from Sargeras. This being inside him, who wasn’t him but would at times take over his body suppressing Medivh’s true self. It’s a horror story where some elements can really hit close to home.
Medivh I believe surrounded himself with like minded, free spirited people like Barnes and the theater troupe (while there’s the joke Medivh’s only seen three plays, I choose to headcanon he’s a theater kid, given how he has a theater to begin with and his own love for theatrics). Whether you picture Medivh as aro, ace, gay, bi, pan, or trans, with the upcoming changes he clearly accepts many kinds of people into his home.
This also has the interesting effect of changing some of the tones for some events in his lore. One example being the titans sending down the Maiden of Virtue to punish Medivh and make him live a more ‘pure’ life. The Titans are Azeroth’s closest thing to a pantheon of gods. They are beings of order, having taken Azeroth in her rawest form and molding her into something they saw fit. Apparently, Medivh’s parties and behavior was seen as something that required ‘correcting’.
On one hand, it’s really easy to read it simply as Medivh being a selfish, spoiled brat. But with looking at it through a queer lens one can put a more positive spin on the situation. The Maiden of Virtue was sent to shame and punish him into conforming into something the Titans believe someone like Medivh should behave. It clearly didn’t work. Looking at this situation, one can read it as Medivh refusing to relinquish his identity because a ‘higher power’ wanted him to. In the real world there are so many that have to hide their orientation and gender thanks to people using religion and belief as a cudgel. So having a character like Medivh as queer, with the power and willfulness to flat out refuse and shut it down is a refreshing power move.
Medivh’s story and the way he is in general has elements that I believe many people of the LBGTQ+ can relate with. He’s a complicated character that has dealt with abuse and being forced into roles without his consent, he made identity for himself and it was stripped away by an oppressor (Sargeras), and, depending on if Blizzard decides he’s actually resurrected/alive instead of being a ghost, is a survivor.
So to me, I love the idea of Medivh being a queer icon in Warcraft. It hasn’t been officially stated by Blizzard at the time this essay was posted but it has started a fun conversation. There are and will be the haters who will scream and tantrum about the LBGTQ+ touching their precious (when convenient) lore with their filthy paws and tarnishing ‘their game’. But in the meantime, I’m going to continue having a blast with the idea and enjoy working the story potential it gives into fanfics, speculations, and essays.
If you enjoyed this essay, I did a few other bits of meta, headcanons, and speculation for fun:
My Completely Self-indulgent Medivh Essay
A Bit About Wizards and Sorcerers
Headcanons: Medivh is Alive and Currently Uses ‘The Guardian’s Study’ as his Home
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Fluff alphabet *Hawks*
(I didn't proofread this. Sorry for any mistakes!) <3
A = Admiration (what do they absolutely adore about you?)
He just loves you. He definitely melts over your mind. You have a very different way of thinking. He never felt a connection with anyone... except for you.
B = Body (what is their favorite part of your body?)
Your eyes. He loves them. The shape. The color. Everything. He know the "eyes are the window to the soul" he feels a deep connection when he look into your eyes.
C = Cuddling (how do they like to cuddle?)
Hawks loves to cuddle. That isn't a secret. He really likes the 'honeymoon hug' position so he can create a little fort with his wings for you both.
D = Dates (what does their ideal date with you look like?)
Any date with you would make him happy. He specifically like dates where you are at home. Just you two. Maybe watching a movie or just talking. Really fancy restaurant dates are mainly for holidays or special occasions.
E = Emotions (how do they express emotion around you?)
He isn't very emotional. By "not very" I mean he is not. He doesn't understand his emotions. The deeper into your relationship, he will be more likely to say how he feels.
F = Family (do they want one? If they do, when?)
I am very split on this. I feel like he does want kids, he is just is scared. He is rarely home. He also is scared on if he can be enough emotional support to his child. His parents obviously weren't good influences so, he doesn't know how to be a "good" parent. It is honestly up to you. If you want kids he will be up for the challenge! If you don't want kid he is fine as well.
G = Gifts (how do they feel about gift giving? What are their habits when it comes to this?)
He LOVES giving gifts. If you're sad he will get you the most expensive jewelry that Tiffany's has! It can be rather annoying sometimes. Especially if you simply just need someone to vent to.
H = Holding Hands (when/how do they like to hold hands?)
He likes the whole thing. Why hold your hand if he is just going to do it weakly. Fingers have to be fully interlocked. (Also, his hands are always cold.)
I = Injury (how would they act if you got hurt?)
He would skip denial (5 stages of grief) and go straight to anger. If your injury is so bad that you end up in the hospital, he will literally get angry at nurses for getting close to you. Hawks would say something like
-"just let me change the IV!"
The poor nurse would have to be like
-"um... are you a trained professional?"
With enough convincing he would let the nurse do their job. Other than that he is extremely cautious of you. Even if you just scrape your knee he will act as if it was the end of the world.
J = Jokes (do they like to joke around with or prank you? how?)
YES. If you like humorous guys, he is perfect for you. He is always joking around and laughing. He has a pretty grey humor. He doesn't joke about inappropriate things though, don't worry.
K = Kisses (how do they like to kiss you?)
He likes long and passionate kisses. It kind of depends though.
L = Love (how do they show you they love you?)
I am split between physical touch and gift giving. Gift giving is when you two are really far apart. You will get your favorite flowers and candy in the mail.
M = Memory (favorite memory together?)
Probably your first date. He took you to a restaurant and that was the day he found out that he really likes you. Before you he thought he was incapable of love. He soon realized that he
N = Nightmare (what is their worst fear?)
Losing you. He can't even think about it. Hawk's loves you alot. He needs so much reassurance that you won't leave him.
O = Oddity (what is one quirk they have?)
*quirk=habits, not "powers"*
I actually did something with this same concept! One that I very lightly touched on was when he is happy his wings will raise. All his emotions are in his wings. If he is angry, his wings puff out. Scared? They kind of curl around him.
P = Pet Names (what do they like to call you?)
We all know the classic "baby bird" which I totally agree with he will call you bird pet names... something tells me that he find those to be a bit to cheesy for his liking. I just feel like you would be more likely to call him bird-ish names than he is. If you want him too he definitely will though! Again, he likes to show you off so if he is like
"This is my baby bird"
He will get weird stares. He will most likely call you "baby" "darling" "love"
Q = Quality Time (how do they like to spend time with you?)
Hawk's favorite thing is to be with you. Whether it's cuddling, or just talking. He doesn't have a favorite way to spend time with you.
R = Rhythm (what song reminds you of them?)
Female: what makes you beautiful- 1D
"Baby, you light up my world like nobody else"
-ok so imagine you two just jamming out to music then... this song comes on. He will scream it at the top of his lungs while looking you straight in the eyes.
Male: I think he knows- taylor swift
"He got my heartbeat, Skipping down 16th Avenue"
-Truth is, hawks is obsessed with you. Ever since he met you, he has been in a better mood. He literally blushes by just thinking about you!
Non-binary: yellow- coldplay
"Look at the stars, Look how they shine for you"
- you and hawks are sitting at the very top of the city. The only lights are from the bright moon and stars. This song is playing softly in the distance.
S = Secrets (how open are they with you?)
He has a lot of secret. He just wants to protect you. That is probably his worst habit. With time he will be more open.
T = Time (how long did it take you to get together?)
I would say you knew each other for at least a year before you started dating. At when you met he would flirt alot. It kind of depends on how you handled it. If you flirted as well he would freak out and kind of distance himself from you, until he realized he couldn't be away from you. If you don't flirt back he will continue flirting until you get interested then he freaks out and yeah. The rest is history
U = Upset (how do they act when you’re upset?)
I also kind of touched on this before. He will get extremely quiet or will explode. He rarely will ever yell though. He has a tendency to just get up and leave. He has a hard time talking about how he feels.
V = Vaunt (what are they proud of? Do they like to show you off?)
Hawk's loves to show you off. He will be on patrol with one of his hero friends and will be like
"Oh! I haven't showed you they picture that y/n sent to me"
He definitely, 1000% is the type of person to find a way to connect you to every conversation he has. He can be talking to someone about something so random like music for example:
"Yeah, my s/o hates that genre"
the person he is talking to will be like: ??????
W = Warrior (how do they feel about you fighting? Would they fight for you, beside you, etc?)
For the most part, Hawks hates when you fight. Even if you "win" he will still be extremely angry. He can't even imagine losing you, it would hurt too much. If you're a pro-hero he would worry a little
less. He knows you're strong and can handle your own but, you're his love. He needs to know that he can protect you.
X = X-Ray (how well are they able to read you?)
No matter how hard you hide your emotions, he always can read you. The only problem he has is understanding how to help you. Before you, he never really had to empathize with anyone on a personal level.
Y = Yes (how would they propose to you?)
I don't see him having a huge proposal. It was probably a spur of the moment. I can only see one of two ways. 1; one of you get badly injured and Hawks realized that he can't bare to lose you. 2; it started as a joke but both of realize that you were both ready.
Z = Zen (what makes them feel calm?)
Wrapping you both in his wings. He knows that in that moment, no one can hurt you.
#anime#hawks imagine#wing hero hawks#hawks x reader#fluff#imagines#my hero academia#mha#pro hero hawks
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Smut Alphabet | Dick Grayson
A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)
Not too fuzzy. He doesn’t complain if you cuddle him or anything, but he isn’t one for seeking it. However, he’ll get you whatever you need.
B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)
His favorite part of himself is his shoulders, he’s proud of his build in general.
He’s obsessed with your boobs, loves littering kisses on the valley of them just because he can.
C = Cum (anything to do with cum basically)
He really likes coming on your chest although he mostly does it inside you or in a condom.
D = Dirty Secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
He loves watching you interact with other people whether those people are attracted to you or not. He always keeps in the back of his mind that you are his and that at the end of the day he’ll be the one fucking you.
Sometimes the idea gets him so hard that he has to either take you home and fuck the shit out of you or press you against the nearest surface and also fuck you.
E = Experience (how experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)
He isn’t shy about how experienced he is and uses it to both his and your advantage.
F = Favorite Position (this goes without saying.)
He prefers having you on your back when he’s giving you oral sex and he loves to fuck you from behind.
G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc.)
He can be goofy if something humorous or slightly awkward happens, but his experience helps with that because he’s never weirded out by anything.
H = Hair (how well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)
He’s usually trimmed. If he’s had a busy week or a mission he might be hairier, but that’s it.
I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)
He’s a very committed partner in general. No matter how rough he’s being, Dick makes sure it adds to your pleasure. He likes to tell you how attractive he finds you, and how pretty you look when he fucks you. Occasionally, he tells you that he loves you as he’s about to come.
J = Jack Off (masturbation headcanon)
Because he has to spend days and sporadically weeks away, masturbation is Dick’s best ally. When missions aren’t too dangerous, he jacks off to sexts from you or even calls you for some good ol’ phone sex.
K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)
Hair pulling, exhibitionism, bondage, breast play, some degradation, and edging.
L = Location (favourite places to do the do)
Anywhere — literally. He doesn’t care if people see or not, the idea of somebody else walking on you or watching your face contorted in pleasure inflates his ego. And hardens his cock.
M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)
Your lingering touches often let him know you’re in the mood and that pretty much does it — even quicker if you’re out in public. That and when you tug on his hair while kissing him.
N = NO (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)
He’s so down to experiment in bed that you would be the one who would have to set the limits. He’ll tell you if he doesn’t like something, obviously, but he’s always happy to try out new things. It takes a looooooot to turn him off.
O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)
He doesn’t have a preference. Dick likes taking his time to eat you out, and he often fingers you while sucking on your clit — feeling you push your hips against his mouth gets him hornier.
P = Pace (are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)
Dick likes building up his pace. There are instances in which he’s gentle and goes slow the entire time, but he usually
Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)
He loves them! Mostly in the mornings. They don’t replace proper sex, but due to how busy he is, you have quickies often.
R = Risk (are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)
Not only is Dick game to experiment, but he also gets turned on by the idea of taking risks — especially in public.
S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)
He can go for solid three rounds with no breaks in the middle. If you want more, then he’ll take a break by either teasing you or eating you out. As for how long he lasts, it depends on how urgently he needs to get off.
T = Toy (do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)
Oh, he does. He prefers using them on you, but there are times in which he lets you take control and cuff him to the bed.
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)
It depends on his mood. He tends to get impatient, but he finds it in him to tease you because he loves watching you writhe and the sounds he gets you to make.
V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make)
Dick is loooooud and enjoys it. His tongue gets loose when you’re having sex.
W = Wild Card (get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)
Dick finds it really hot to wake you up with oral sex. He doesn’t mind if you do it or not, but he looks forward to doing it.
X = X-Ray (let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)
Longer than average.
Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)
Oh, he’s horny all the time.
Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
He generally waits for you to fall asleep first.
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A Father’s Love
pairing: steve rogers x reader ft. sarah rogers
requests:Hey, can I ask for a Steve Sarah fic where baby Sarah is injured or unwell and Steve is more distressed than the reader and cries holding Sarah and she assures him that she is fine and brave girl -anon
2. hi i love your writing!! i have a request for a headcanon or oneshot: i watched ww84 (which was not that good of a movie oof) but there was a romantic fireworks scene and it made me think of celebrating 4th of july with steve rogers on his birthday and just like, cuddling up next to him on a picnic blanket while watching him watch the fireworks and oh it just makes me so SOFT- anon
word count: 1,750
author’s note: pardon any mistakes! sorry for combining the requests, hope y'all still like it!
gif below was found on google
Never before in your life had you ever experienced such fear. Although the warm sun streamed down in rays, creating a happy scene, you were somewhere else. A place where nothing else mattered except for your daughter. Nerves, anticipation, and dread flooded your veins. Any parent would feel this way, especially under these circumstances. A majority of the time, you wouldn’t consider yourself a “helicopter parent,” even though Bucky and Sam would say otherwise. Now, was an exception because your four year old daughter was learning to roller skate in the cul-de-sac where her grandparents currently reside. Her little hand was interlaced with her father’s and the 6’2 man crouched down to be a bit shorter. He was anything but an expert in this field and that made you even more nervous as he’d occasionally slip. Before you could say anything to him, he’d just put a hand out, signaling that everything was okay, and you’d be left to bite down on your lip, silently channeling your fear.
From the looks of it, one would think you weren’t trusting of your husband and while that wasn’t the whole truth, you just knew he wasn’t the most...graceful and elegant human on planet earth. Rather he was the type of guy to fall and literally laugh it off. That was fine for him, but if your daughter fell on this rocky pavement, well, you’d both have another coming. Or at least that’s what you had assumed.
Sarah’s giggles echoed and you could hear your parents’ shouts of encouragement from the house. You were standing on the end of the driveway, eyes glued to the giant man and the tiny girl, happily skating around. After a few minutes, Sarah finally found her footing, so to say, and was actually skating without Steve’s support.
Finally, you dropped your shoulders and let out a sigh of relief at the two enjoying themselves. It was all going fine until Sarah was turning, like she had done so many times before, but this time happened to catch a rock under a wheel on her right skate.
In your mind, it all happened in slow motion, making your feet stay grounded, yet your conscience was “running” to her. Steve’s face looked absolutely mortified and he dropped to his knees, ignoring the pain from the harsh contact, he immediately scooped up the girl.
For a moment, her lip quivered and Steve continued to soothingly stroke her hair, gazing into her watering eyes. Just when you thought the dam would break, Sarah swallowed her sobs, shook it all off, and stood from her father’s lap. She even held out a hand to help him up and he looked very shocked. Even more shocked than when you told him you were going into labor, which was quite the experience, one you preferred to not re-live.
Eventually, you joined the two and up close you could see that Steve had a single tear running down his face. You knew his worst fear was failing his daughter, he had told you so many years ago. Sarah noticed Steve’s sorrow and she got down once more to sit back on her heels. With gentle movement, Sarah wrapped her arms around the man’s broad shoulders and pulled him into the most lovable hug you’ve seen in ages.
“It’s okay, Daddy. Please don’t cry! See I’m just as brave as you!”
Your daughter then laid her head on his shoulder, the two of them in their own little world as usual. You hated to break them up, but they were currently sitting in the middle of the road and you’d rather not get hit by a car. Softly, you tapped Steve’s shoulder and he slowly rose up, Sarah in his arms and tired from the scare as well. The three of you made your way back up the driveway and into the house where your mother met you with the same nervous look you had once wore. Once a nurse, always a nurse, for she had a first aid kit in hand. You quickly reassured her and followed Steve back to your rooms.
Summer in New York City wasn’t that much enjoyable, so ever since Sarah had been born, you and Steve come in July to stay at your parents house. Today was Fourth of July and you helped your parents with their annual barbeque. That went well and then the whole roller skating incident happened and now here you were. It was 3 in the afternoon and since it was Steve’s birthday, you had some surprise plans for him later. He was unaware and had assumed you had forgotten his birthday, which you had not.
An hour later, you found Sarah in the pool with your parents while Steve sat on one of the lounge chairs, only khaki swim trunks on. You could tell he’d been out of the pool for a while as his hair was starting to look a bit fluffy. Steve’s eyebrows were furrowed in concentration and in his lap you could see a sketch that he was tediously working on. Your daughter was too busy playing pool volleyball with her grandparents, that the three were yet to notice your presence. Deciding to take matters into your own hands, you strutted over to Steve and sat on the edge of his seat where you gently tapped his leg to gain his attention.
“Whatcha working on, Grant?”
Steve peered up at you, his smile possibly even brighter than the sun that reflected on you both. He silently passed off the sketchbook to you. The sketch depicted the scene happening before your eyes, your parents bonding with Sarah, all of them wearing large grins and laughter. It was the kind of picture that could lift someone's mood in an instant, all because Steve was the best at portraying emotions in his artwork.
“So, birthday boy, I have some plans for you… that is if you are still up to it.” You motioned to his current laid back state and Steve looked down at himself to see what you meant. He was curious as to what you had planned, having told you not to plan anything for his birthday.
“Oh honey, I told you not to do anything.” Steve looked at you disapprovingly, his sunglasses now pulled down so you could feel the full effect of his “glaring.”
“It’s not everyday that a wife gets to celebrate her husband’s...” Pausing, you did some quick mental math (that may have not been accurate) and came to an answer, “102nd birthday!”
At that, Steve lurched forward and pulled you onto his lap, placing a kiss on your temple as his arms tightly wrapped around your waist.
“You spoil me too much, doll.” A simple hum was your only reply and you leaned back into his embrace.
----
About an hour later, both you and Steve got quick showers and tidied up a bit. The only thing Steve had heard about where you were taking him, was that it wasn’t too fancy as you told him to dress casual. As Steve got ready, you asked Sarah if she wanted to come along, but instead she decided to stay back and make some cookies with your mom.
The two of you then met at the front door where you kissed Sarah goodbye and headed off to the car. Just as Steve was about to get in the driver’s seat, you stole the keys from his grasp and gave him a small “tsk tsk” causing the man to laugh. Earlier, while Steve had gotten dressed, you had been able to sneak out and put a prepared picnic basket in the trunk of the car along with a large blanket. For Steve’s birthday, you were taking him to see fireworks at a nearby park. You knew how much of a sucker he was for fireworks and a good, old fashioned, park picnic.
As you pulled into the entrance of the park and globs of people sat out on the field, Steve’s eyes started to sparkle with excitement and you couldn't help but grin at him.
“Babe, is this what I think it is?”
You put the car in park and turned in your seat to fully face Steve, “If you’re thinking fireworks and a picnic, then you’re right. I’m sorry it’s not a lot, but I know how much you-”
Before you could finish your unnecessary apology, Steve sweetly grabbed your face and pulled you in for an enchanting kiss.
“It’s perfect, (y/n).”
Steve’s face softened into a loving look and his azure eyes looked the slightest bit shiny in the moonlight.
You parted away from the man and exited the car, heading to the trunk where Steve met you. He helped carry the picnic basket despite your pleas for him to not do so.
The park wasn't too crowded, but there were just enough people for you and Steve to have to search around for a good ten minutes. Eventually you spotted this place under a tree that wasn’t too surrounded and had a perfect view of where the fireworks would be.
Swiftly, you laid out the plaid picnic blanket and Steve then set down the picnic basket that was filled with the components of your dinner. You began to set out the prepared food, even bringing out a candle, albeit fake, that provided some romantic and not overwhelming lighting.
Since you both had arrived twenty minutes before the show started, it allowed for you and Steve to enjoy the dinner peacefully. You had even packed some desserts but those would be for during the show as a little something to snack on.
Just as the show started, you had finished packing away the last of the Tupperware containers and now settled in between Steve's legs, his chest providing use as a pillow. The man delicately rested his chin on your shoulder and in return, you lovingly rubbed his forearms that laid in your lap.
“Thank you for the best birthday, my love. You’ve given me so much over these past few years and I swear I don’t know what I’d be without you.”
It was a whisper in your ear, but you still heard it over the loud crackling of the fireworks.
With a warm smile and quiet giggle, you brought his hand to your lips and placed a kiss on the back of his hand.
“Only you could pull off such a cheesy line, Rogers.”
#this one is kind of trash im sorry#Steve Rogers#steve rogers x reader#steve rogers x y/n#steve rogers one shot#dad steve rogers#dad steve rogers x reader#sarah rogers#steve x sarah#chris evans x reader#chris evans fanfiction
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i knew i loved you then (but you'd never know)
i have no self control and another fic was born out of what was supposed to be just an outline on how i would write it. sorry, not sorry. thanks @thedeathdeelers for sending in the incredible prompt that led to this fic!!
julie molina, pop princess taking on the world by storm, with her trusty bodyguard by her side. a short take on how luke and julie fall in love while travelling the world.
bodyguard au
masterlist
For as long as she could remember, Julie Molina couldn’t picture herself doing anything except performing in front of screaming fans every night.
It was everything she ever wanted. She would practice by herself in front of her mirror, giggling when she spotted her mom peeking from the doorway. Sometimes Rose would join her, grabbing Julie’s hairbrush to harmonize with her daughter.
Julie would sometimes stop and stare in awe at her mother’s range; every shred of talent Julie had was because of her.
It was their routine, their tradition.
Until it wasn’t.
After her mother’s death, it took Julie a while to be able to sing; by herself in front of the mirror and in front of anyone else. Why should she get the opportunity to showcase her talent when the entire reason she had any at all wasn’t there to see it anymore?
But then she realized the only way to rid herself of the anger and hurt she was feeling, was to write it down. Her words eventually transformed into song lyrics, and without even realizing it, she started singing again. It happened gradually, to the point where she didn’t even notice what a massive change it was for her.
Then she started playing for an audience; she needed an outlet for her thoughts and feelings and this was the perfect opportunity for her. When she was noticed by a producer at random, it didn’t even hit her until she was signing her first ever record deal.
Julie signed the papers, stepped into the bathroom and cried for a solid ten minutes.
She wanted so badly for her mom to be here with her, to witness this monumental moment. Julie knew, no matter what, Rose was looking down from above, beaming with pride. She promised herself she would do this for her, to make her proud.
That was how Julie found herself on her third tour, following her third number one album.
Her first album went straight to number one. Julie remembered the moment she found out; she was grocery shopping with her father when she received a call from her label to give her the good news. Both she and Ray couldn’t contain the screams of excitement as they jumped around in the cereal aisle.
After that, everything changed for Julie.
In preparation for her first local tour, multiple people were hired to take part of the crew; so many that Julie couldn't possibly name them all. She was appreciative of every single one, especially the ones in her immediate circle. While she played her piano mostly, she still needed a band for the road; that was how she met Alex, Reggie and Bobby.
Alex dominated on drums, throwing some sass everywhere he went. He constantly made rehearsals the place to be, sometimes maybe a bit too distracting. Reggie played the bass so passionately, Julie didn't think she'd ever met someone so passionate about an instrument. He always kept her laughing in rehearsals, especially with his dances as he played. Bobby took the lead as their rhythm guitarist; he was quiet and shy, but when he joined in on the other boy's shenanigans, he felt completely in his element, almost like they'd been friends for ages.
She loved her band so much, she insisted they accompany her on every future tour.
While her first one was small and local, she never could've dreamed that she would be embarking on her third tour, this one being a world tour. It was the most exciting journey, and now at the age of twenty-two, she would be taking this trip solo. It was intimidating, but she knew she had the best team.
It also happened that she had the best protection detail around.
The more she was known, the faster her fanbase grew and just to be on the safe side, her label hired her a bodyguard to accompany her on the first tour. When she first met him, she was shocked; he was so young. She truly believed he could do no better of a job than she could, but during her first mobbing, he proved just how resilient he was.
Julie quickly realized that when it came to her safety, Luke Patterson did not mess around.
He was two years older than her, and it seemed like her label was trying to surround her with staff that she could feel comfortable around. At the time, it was her first tour and the only person she knew was her father and brother. It was nice to have people close to her age that she could pass the time with.
Luke had worked with other celebrities before he landed his gig protecting Julie Molina. But he could safely say, no one he had ever met even came close to her. With someone being thrown into the limelight at such a young age, the rush of fame could very easily corrupt them. But that didn't happen with Julie. She was always so kind, so appreciative of everyone helping her dreams come true.
It was so easy to get along with her, and it helped that they got on exceptionally well. He spent more time with Julie than anyone else in the crew; he quite literally watched her grow as a popstar, at how she handled her success. But she never had a wild phase. All she ever wanted to do was make her family proud and continue to make music.
Julie had such a big heart.
He knew it was unprofessional, but he couldn't help it - his attachment grew.
By the time her third tour rolled around, they'd known each other for years; they were friends more than anything. It became normal for him to linger longer than necessary, but Julie never seemed to mind. Everyone knew he had his own space on the second tour bus for crew, but they also didn't question when he began spending more and more time in Julie's tour bus.
Once again, she never objected.
"What do you think of this?"
Julie was clad in a pair of sweatpants and a merch hoodie. Her feet were adorned with fluffy slippers and they were hoisted on Luke's lap.
They were on the road to their next city, Julie was exhausted from her show earlier that night, but she was adamant on finishing a new song. Even though she was celebrating the success from album three with a tour, she still couldn't stop herself from starting on album four. Luke always warned her that she would burn herself out, but her determination strayed beyond his wise words.
Luke read over Julie's lyrics, humming thoughtfully. She was aware that he was into music, but Luke never revealed just how into music he really was. He wasn't confident enough about his vocal abilities to sing in front of a worldwide popstar, even if it was only Julie. She also knew he dabbled in writing songs, but he seriously undersold it, because if she were to ever ask to see his material, he wouldn't even be able to show her.
Why wouldn't he be able to show her?
Because he wasn't sure when it happened, but somewhere between their years of knowing each other, months upon months of spending every waking moment together, Luke fell in love.
Every line he wrote, every word, was about Julie.
"That's beautiful, Jules," he had responded softly.
It was dark in the bus, only the soft lighting from the lamp beside Julie illuminating their surroundings. She was growing sleepy; playing a two hour show every night really drained the life out of her. She was hyper aware of how close Luke was next to her. She knew he wouldn't get off her bus until their next stop, wherever that may be.
Julie might as well enjoy his company while she still had it.
She grabbed the notebook out of his hands and tossed it aside. She also pulled her feet off his lap and curled them underneath her instead, scooting closer to lie her head comfortably on his shoulder.
Luke stiffened for a moment.
But then she curled her arm around his and he nearly melted. All the words died on his tongue.
He wanted nothing more than to be here in the moment.
He knew it was wrong. His feelings were incredibly inappropriate, but it wasn't as if he could shut them off. He didn't think his feelings affected his job performance; if anything, he felt even more motivated to keep her as safe as possible.
It didn't change his behaviour with her either. He would never do anything to make her uncomfortable or ruin the bond between them. He merely suffered with his feelings in silence; it was for the best, and he knew that.
Luke genuinely believed his feelings were completely one-sided.
But as time went on, he started noticing things.
It was Julie's first worldwide tour; the stakes were much higher and Luke knew his job was more important than ever. His focus was first and foremost on Julie's well-being, feelings be damned. He truly tried to even distance himself, keep it strictly professional. But then he noticed the way Julie's eyes would linger on him sometimes. Sometimes her smiles were softer, almost like they were just for him.
At first, he thought he was absolutely losing his mind. Maybe his brain was just trying to trick him and show him just how ridiculous this whole thing was, but eventually, he couldn't deny it anymore. Not after she basically stared directly at him for the entirety of one of her love songs.
And it wasn't only that.
Sometimes she would hit him with some flirty comments, ones where he would actually have to take a moment because what? But then other times, she avoided him like the plague. He was having a hard time keeping up with her and pinning her down, but he was really starting to get the impression that maybe his feelings weren't completely one-sided.
Eventually, she continued to avoid him like the plague (which, made his job increasingly more difficult since he was supposed to be protecting her). It made things awkward and this was supposed to be a good experience, especially for her. Every time he tried to clear the air and have an adult conversation about the tension between them, she did everything in her power to avoid it. The excuses she came up with bewildered him.
He tried to be as patient as possible. This was her moment, he didn't want to ruin anything. But she knew this better than anyone, he was everything but a patient man.
It all came to a head in Barcelona.
Luke finally felt like he was making some progress again. Julie had actually stayed in his presence longer than needed and seemed to enjoy it as they threw some jokes back and forth. He wished her luck before she went on stage and she sent him such a blinding smile, he momentarily forgot how to breathe.
So, when she finished her show, he politely congratulated her, as he did every night.
He was momentarily knocked backwards a few steps as she threw herself into his arms. He was surprised, but in the absolutely best way. It had been a while since she'd felt comfortable enough to be in his embrace. Luke could feel her melting into the hug.
But then it went on a second too long, or it got far too intimate for Julie because she pulled away as if he burned her.
She refused to meet his gaze and mumbled something about going to change.
Luke was so glad everyone around was too busy to realize what had just happened. Truth be told, he wasn't even sure what happened; all he knew was that he was feeling awkward and uncomfortable and he really wasn't sure he could go on like this any longer.
She was clearly feeling something, though what that was, he wasn't sure. But her inability to have a conversation with him about it was really starting to put a strain on their professional and personal relationship.
Luke wasn't sure how much longer he could hold on.
Later that night, when it was time to lead Julie back to her tour bus, Luke checked out their path before bringing Julie out. Fans and paparazzi clouded their way and Luke knew he had to clear a safe way for Julie to get the few feet to her tour bus.
When Julie stormed past him, his jaw dropped in shock.
It took him a second to spring into action; he had to literally run to catch up with her and get in front.
She knew the routine, they did this all the time. Julie always went behind Luke; always.
Luke grunted angrily as Julie attempted to move past him for the fourth time since they exited the building.
As soon as they reached the door of her tour bus, Julie zoomed inside and shut the door harshly behind her.
Luke took a deep, calming breath before storming in after her.
"What the hell was that?"
Julie ignored him as she went to the fridge to grab a drink; Luke's eye twitched.
"I'm responsible for your safety. How am I supposed to keep you safe if you pull that bullshit?" He was angry now and his tone conveyed that. To his utter infuriation, Julie continued to ignore him.
She took a seat on the couch and grabbed the television remote. She was acting as if he wasn't even there.
Luke stepped forward and captured the remote out of her hand. Her venomous eyes turned on him and he had to take a step back at the pure hatred within them.
"Julie," he breathed, brokenly. He felt like all the air had been sucked out of the room. "What is going on? You've been avoiding me for weeks."
Her eyes seemed to soften, but her gaze was still nowhere near how she used to look at him. He wasn't sure where everything had changed.
But then he watched as Julie swallowed harshly and stared at anything but him. That was when he knew.
He knew this wouldn't work. He was in love with her and she couldn't even stand to be around him anymore.
He couldn't do this. He couldn't protect her anymore. Not from the world and not from him.
Luke's heart started to break the moment he realized what he had to do next.
"I'm sorry, Julie," Luke's voice cracked with the pain he was feeling. It felt like his heart was being physically removed from his chest. "I can't do this anymore." Julie finally met his eyes, eyebrows furrowing at the glimmer of tears. "I'm compromised. I'm in love you with and I clearly can't protect you anymore. You can't even look at me."
Julie felt her heart physically drop.
He looked so broken, so crushed, quite literally ready to cry. He finally admitted what Julie had been trying to admit to herself for months. He was so much braver than her; he was stepping down from his job because it was the 'better' option for both of them. He was stepping down from his job because of her. Because she had ignored him for months because she wasn't brave enough to face what she was feeling.
It wasn't fair to him.
It was time for Julie to be the brave one.
Luke was ready to leave; he had backed up a few steps closer to the door. He was giving her an opportunity to stop him, to tell him something that would change his mind, but she didn't say anything.
It broke his heart all over again.
Before he could turn away to leave, Julie launched forward into his arms. Her arms wrapped tightly around his neck, legs locked around his waist. It was the closest they'd been in weeks, the most intimate they'd been ever.
The words weren't coming to her.
But Luke couldn't hold her the way she needed, not until she gave him something.
"Don't leave me."
His arms squeezed around her almost instantly, as tightly as he possibly could. His face was buried in her curls and he sighed.
It still wasn't enough.
"I don't think I can stay. Not when I feel the way I do."
Julie pulled back to look into his eyes, her own shimmering with unshed tears. "What if I felt the same way?"
Luke forgot how to breathe. There were no words in his brain, nothing he could say in this absolutely perfect moment. He didn't need to say anything though because Julie wasn't finished.
"I think I'm in love with you too," she admitted, feeling the most vulnerable she ever had in her life. "Please don't leave."
Julie's head found its way to Luke's neck. She couldn't let him go; she was too scared he would leave.
"I'm not going anywhere, Julie."
Even with his promise, she couldn't find it in her to let him go; so, she didn't.
Luke sat them down on the couch, keeping her close.
When she finally pulled her head out of his neck, she was met with his sparkling green eyes, shining with pure happiness. It coaxed a giggle from her lungs and Luke joined in.
The pure joy they were feeling couldn't be matched.
But then their laughter died off as Julie's eyes glanced down to Luke's mouth.
The energy between them changed immediately.
Luke's urge to kiss her was nearly overpowering, but he wanted Julie to feel comfortable. His hand found its way up to cradle her cheek; she leaned into his touch, closing her eyes and sighing in contentment.
He leaned his face closer, giving her an out, if she wanted it. But she didn't.
Instead, she chased his lips with her own, pressing into him. She had wasted too much time acting like a child; she wasn't going to waste anymore. Her hands found themselves in his hair, scratching at his scalp and eliciting a low moan from him.
Luke senses were overwhelmed, but in the best way possible. He pushed back against Julie's lips, as she deepened the kiss, parting his lips.
He kissed her fiercely, like she was the oxygen he'd been deprived of. It was the type of kiss that left little room for thought; his focus was all on feeling this moment, remembering this moment.
Julie pulled away with a giggle to take a breath.
Luke still hadn't gotten enough of her and his mouth travelled to her jaw, dropping light butterfly kisses. Julie closed her eyes in contentment, tipping her head. When his mouth moved to her neck, all logic immediately flew out of her brain. She was unable to form coherent thoughts when Luke's tongue was doing that to her neck.
When she let out a whisper of a whimper, Luke popped back up with hooded eyes.
"God, I'm so in love with you," he mumbled before diving back into her lips.
Julie loved him too, and in that moment, she vowed to never do anything to ever make him second guess his place in her life.
x
okay so now that i wrote ‘luke and julie falling in love while travelling the world’ i want to write an even more fledged out fic WHERE THEY ACTUALLY TOUR THE WORLD AND FALL IN LOVE. i can’t be satiated. anyway, i hope you enjoyed.
tagging a few lovely mutuals who shared some interest: @brightattheorpheum @pink-flame @missjoolee @ourstarscollided @burntchromas
#julie and the phantoms#jatp#juke#julie molina#luke patterson#juke au#jatp au#juke fics#jatp fics#luke x julie#jatp fic#juke fic#jukebox#fics
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