#it can be hard to find the motivation you need when you're feeling down or overwhelmed. Here are 5 ways that have helped me stay motivated. | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

areislol · 4 months

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ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ❝SWEET!❞

►— pairings. various genshin men x fem! reader

►— warnings. smut, cursing, dirty talk, just smutty. implied reader has somewhat thick thighs, 18+ fingering, MDNI

►— synopsis. an alternative title, how do they eat pussy?

►— a/n. been having these thoughts for a bit now i need to jot them down before my obsession grows worse.

►— wordcount. 2.3k

they eat that pussy like it's a religion, his head buried in between your legs, his hands gripping onto your thighs tightly, using his strength to keep your thighs still and from closing in. his eyes are focused solely on your face as he languidly drags his tongue into a line on your wet pussy.

he's addicted, to say the least. the smell, the taste, the lewd and dirty sounds you were making, he loved it all, and all the while as his mouth latches onto your poor abused cunt he whispers the sweetest things in your ear, dirty words as well. he switches between both. on the rare occasions that he does tease you he will whisper the most vile and dirty things you've ever heard, but most of the time he's just craving you, he just can't wait, once you give him the word that he could go down on you he wastes no time and before you know it he's sandwiched between your thighs and giving you an orgasm.

every time he eats you out he reminds you of a starving animal (if you didn't know any better), every time he eats you out you are a mess, and your pussy is a mess. your juices, sweat and saliva combined created a nasty sight it made him achingly hard but even so he prioritizes your pleasure first as he grinds his bulge on the bed. your moans and praises as you grip his hair and push his head deeper in were all he needed while jerking your hips at the same time.

his nose rested on your clit, the air hitting your clit as his tongue relentlessly flicked up and down your folds, he sucks and kisses your clit before adding a finger in. yes, although he does love to eat you out he also loves fingering you as well, the sweet moans and screams you let out just get him so hard it motivates him to eat you out even more. not that he plans on stopping. he barely teases you, he doesn't like the idea of stripping you of the chance to cum because truth be told he really really wants you to cum on his face (and sometimes he unintentionally overstimulates you).

— XIAO, CHILDE, kaveh, CYNO, WRIOTHESLEY, thoma, lyney, VENTI, itto, gorou

teases you while eating you out and teases you before eating you out, he knew what you wanted but continued to tease you, savouring every moment when you squirm and whine for him to go down on you. he's mean, he doesn't stick to one pace and instead chooses to go slow and fast, it's just how your face contorts when he buries his face against your pussy and begins to lick and slurp your folds and just when you're about to cum (he has been teasing your poor pussy for so long the second he begins to actually eat you out you're too sensitive, that's him to blame) he slows down his pace, a frustrated cry leaving your lips as tears brim your eyes, you just wanted him to do it properly.

he doesn't mind fingering you as he licks your clit but he finds it satisfyingly when he knows only he can make you cum with his tongue, when he feels nice he'll finger you with one or two fingers, pumping in and out of your mushy walls as his tongue rolls over your sensitive bud, his tactic never fails to get you cumming in no time.

he won't lie, he loves seeing you in tears as he continues to tease your bud and clit with his tongue, he isn't even giving it his all, his cheeks aren't even pressed against your inner thighs and here you are, let out cries for him to please eat you out, it's adorable. and when he thinks you're ready and he had enough teasing you already he's already lapping at your folds and humming, the vibrations and hums on your sensitive skin make it all the more pleasurable. he isn't that bad though, when he feels bad for you or feels like you've endured enough teasing he'll make sure to make it up by eating you out good (not saying he never does).

that doesn't mean he's not done being mean to you though, he's heavy on eye contact. he loves making eye contact with you as he brutally violates your clit, and he lives to see the faces you make as he inserts one finger in your soaking pussy, juices spilling out of your greedy hole, he loves seeing how you gasp when he swiftly slips in another finger, teasing you as he says how wet you were that he could easily fit in a third finger.

but he hates when you look away in embarrassment, he'll stop doing what he's doing—he'll stop his fingers from bottoming in and out of your pussy, and he'll stop his sucking and licking at your clit when you look away from embarrassment, "getting shy now are we? guess that means i'll have to stop.." you whine and quickly look back at him, looking down and meeting his eyes, his gaze was hot and intense, mouth and cheeks wet with your juices and his saliva, it was dirty.

"keep looking at me as i fuck you with my tongue, you understand? i want to see your face as you cum, i want you to watch me as i make you cum, got that?"

— ALHAITHAM, AYATO, WANDERER, pierro, PANTALONE, TIGHNARI, HEIZOU, DOTTORE, capitano

gentle and soft yet never fails to make you orgasm hard, he relishes in watching your dripping entrance as you wait for him to go down on you. he takes things slow and is very passionate, he considers himself a lucky man every time he eats you out because he knows only he is allowed to be in this position, no one else. he is sort of possessive when in the act when he really thinks about it, no one has eaten your pussy out this good, your moans and cries are only for him to hear.

despite him taking it slowly he is a god at eating pussy (you can't change my mind), he plants soft and tender kisses on your thighs before slowly reaching your inner thighs, you whine and beg for him to hurry up but he only shushes you and reminds you to be patient. "ah, remember to be patient love, i want to savour this moment.." you let out a soft moan and bring your head backwards when he finally kissed your clit.

his hands are tightly yet tenderly holding your legs apart, his hands grabbing a hold of the soft plush of your thighs. he leans in closer to your pussy, his thumb prying your wet pussy slightly open, he stares at it in awe before softly blowing on it, the cold air hitting your sensitive folds. your back arches as a shaky sigh escapes your lips, he looks up from his position and smirks before latching his mouth onto your pussy, it was all so sudden it caught you off-guard but within a couple of seconds the pleasure had taken over your body, your mind was clouded with nothing but pleasure.

he loves it when you yank and grip his hair, pulling him in closer to your pussy just to create more friction. you were so greedy it was cute so he always allowed it, he hummed and moaned softly as he ate you out, the vibrating sensation never failed you made your legs tremble and he knew it. he nips and softly (just barely) bites at your folds before covering them with a long kiss and when he releases he lets out a "pop!", your moans grow louder and louder the more he licks and slurps at your sensitive dripping entrance.

he knows when you're about to cum, the sound of your gasps and moans strained, the way your grip on his hair tightens as you try to pull him in closer to your pussy (it already is but he isn't complaining) and your hips jerking up—he closes his eyes, taking in the moment and makes sure to hold you steady when you finally reach your climax, thighs, hands and legs trembling from the overwhelming feeling of pleasure.

and even after cumming on his face he continues to eat you out (obsessed much), you try to push his head away but he only narrows his eyes at you, it was hot to see him maintaining eye contact with you so well as he licked and slurped up your sweet essence. "don't try to push me away now princess, not after you were so eager to cum and pushed me in so close. just another, please?"

he's the type, that even after you're passed out in bed from cumming, his head's still in between your thighs, bumping his nose onto your clit for stimulation as a few strands of hair tickled your thighs. he really enjoys eating you out, if you can't tell (he doesn't even stop even after you've done passed out) but you know what he enjoys as well? face sitting, the feeling of your soft thighs squeezing his head as you ride his face and nose is everything.

he ignores his own problem when eating you out, his cock was aching, all hot and bothered. but he didn't mind, if anything just seeing you cum from his tongue and mouth made him cum (happened too many times), he's too preoccupied with your pleasure anyway. although if you really do insist on helping him out then... (can he put his dick in?)

— ZHONGLI, DILUC, albedo, BAIZHU, DAINSLEIF, aether, kaeya, KAZUHA, NEUVILLETTE

definition of "pussy drunk", he LOVES eating you out.. so what if he suffocates between your thighs? he will gladly and happily suffocate between your thighs. although he is a bit shy doing it in public the thought of someone walking in the restroom and hearing the lustful moans coming from one closed stall makes him hard, at first he's soft and slow and kissing your thighs but that only lasts for a bit before he's literally making out with your pussy.

he LIVES to hear your praises when you mewl his name and cry out of pleasure, his lips swollen from burying his mouth deeper into your warm pussy, his nails digging into your thighs as juices (was it cum, saliva or sweat? who knows?) coated his chin, dribbling down his neck. it was a sticky mess and he loved it. his eyes are closed shut, brows furrowing his concentration as he sloppily laps over your hot, swollen puffy cunt. and when he does open his eyes he only does it to admire your soaking pussy coated with slick before licking up your cream, and his eyes? god they're so dazed and lustful it makes you feel embarrassed, real pussy drunk.

one thing he will never ever get enough of is the taste and how messy it gets. call him a freak or whatever you want but the sensation of his cheeks and mouth smothered by your juices and arousal as he gently nipped at your folds and slurped up all of your essence, is something to die for. the way your slick rolls down from his lips to his chin and down his neck, the tickling sensation is one he will never forget.

who knows what the slick is made up of? was it from your arousal? was it his spit and drool? perhaps both. there's just something irresistible about how dirty you could get just by his tongue and fingers that does something to him (not to mention the precum leaking out of his boxers), the more you cry out in pleasure and overstimulation makes him crack.

he's extremely skilled when eating pussy, that's just something he's naturally good at but you swear he gets better and better every time.. maybe you're too kind to let him eat you out nearly every day. but the more he goes down on you the more he learns—what spot you like the most, where's the most sensitive part, what combination you like, what pace... you get the jist. one of his favourite things is when you get too overwhelmed with pleasure to the point where your legs are shaking and pushing his head away, crying out for him to stop—that you were full.

"full? already? but i haven't even used my fingers yet..." he sighs (directly onto your pussy) and only ducks his head back in despite your futile attempts to push his head away, he knew your energy was low meaning you couldn't push him away even if you wanted to. he could eat out for hours on end, even days if he could (he would), he gets really delirious when eating you out, it's as if everything around him is gone, he's like his own little world with your pussy. the low groan and grumbled escaping his lips as he licks your clit up and down before sucking on it, letting go with a loud "pop!"

and once again he's back it, his tongue brazenly exploring your cunt before swirling at your poor sensitive bud, with every sharp and precise movement he makes he does it with every intention to make you cum, for like the third time. the way he's alternating between your clit and your needy hole makes your mind crazy, too fucked out to think about anything but the intense pleasure, and with every exhale his warm breath hits your flushed skin, his tongue lapping over your squishy folds. he'll never leave your pussy alone, will he?

— XIAO, ZHONGLI, ALHAITHAM, DILUC

the one thing they all have in common is that in the end when he pulls away he can't tell whether or not you're extremely wet because of your arousal/sweat or his saliva, or maybe it's both, who knows?

note: uuuuhhhhhhh dialogue or the text itself may be a bit icky (I'M NOT GOOD AT WRITING SMUT) so if it irks you just stay quiet and go on about your day. (*′з`b)

taglist: @tomansimp @one-offmind @miitchiji @dainsleif-when-playable @momoewn @stygianoir @irethepotato @v4an @imetsk @fiannee @sunnyf4lls if im missing anyone please tell me because i have an inkling feeling i missed a few..

liking + following + reblogs are very much appreciated!!!

another note: slightly proof read so if you found any spelling/grammar mistakes PLEASE tell me.

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rainyyynightssss · 19 days

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Twisted Wonderland

Reacting to you having trouble with other students

Characters: Trey, Jade, Floyd, Rook

Notes: Some violence

Trey Clover

You sit next to Trey at a library table, shoulders brushing up against each other as you both look at the textbooks splayed across the surface. You had been having trouble some of your classwork and it seemed harder than usual since you come from a world without magic. Trey, noticing your struggles, offered to help you study which was a compromise since you first asked to copy his notes.

You've been trying to focus on the notes and tips he's giving you instead of the lingering touches as he directs your hand to the next page, or the small praises he gives you after getting a question right, or his soft breath on your cheek as he leans close to check your work. No, you've been diligently studying and not feeling any kind of heat in your face.

"And what about this one?" Trey asks as he taps his finger on the open page in the textbook. You look down at the words and think for a moment.

"Um..so sublimation is...turning solids into gas...without having to go through the liquid phase?" You half-guess. Trey smiles and hands you another chocolate covered candy that he had called 'motivation'.

"Right again. You're better at this than you think." He says as he flips the pages over to the next question. You sigh and rest your face on your hand.

"I really should be compensated for all this trouble." You mention.

"The trouble of doing your work?" Trey chuckles, "I can whip something up for you later. Your favorite, of course." He winks.

Just as you're about to launch into a discussion about your favorite dessert, something hard is knocked into the back of your head. You whip around and find a couple of Heartslabyul boys passing behind you. One of them is holding a heavy book and smirking while the other two try to hide their snickers behind their hands.

You have no idea what you could have done to these boys. Sometimes just breathing was enough to piss off students at Night Raven College.

"Whoops. Wasn't paying attention." One of the boys says flippantly as he shifts the book to his other arm, nearly smacking you again. You rub the back of your head, ready to tell them off when one of them eyes the bag of candies on the table.

"Oh, Trey! Can we have some? Please!" The boy begs and his friends follow suit. Trey stares at them with a blank look for a few moments before smiling.

"Sure. Here you go," He hands them a handful of the chocolate candies each, "They taste better if you eat them all at once."

The Heartslabyul boys run off after receiving the candy without a thank you or an apology. You narrow your eyes at Trey.

"Awfully kind of you to give candy to my assailants." You sigh dramatically but Trey shakes his head.

"Something tells me they won't be enjoying this treat." He smiles again.

Suddenly, across the room, you can hear a chorus of "ewwww"'s followed by some coughing and gagging. You gape and turn back towards Trey.

"What did you change the taste to?" You ask in interest but he merely winks at you.

"I have no clue. It's just supposed to be chocolate." He responds innocently. His smile turns into a frown as he gently rubs the back of your head where you were hit.

"I'm sorry I couldn't do more. Though if it's any consolation, Riddle will probably deal with them after he finds out just how severe their lack of manners are." Trey offers.

You think his caresses on your head like you're something that needs care is consolation enough. But you don't say that, instead leaving your head on his shoulder and closing your eyes. Trey closes the textbooks and wraps an arm around your waist, done with studying for today but he didn't need an excuse to want to hang out with you.

Jade Leech

You finish taking a couple's order down on the notepad Azul provided to you and walk back towards the kitchen. You've been taking a couple shifts at the Mostro Lounge in order to pay off some of the damage Grim has caused by being...everywhere. Azul was benevolent enough to take you in and you just managed to slip through signing a contract with him, much to his chagrin.

Jade took on the responsibility of showing you the ropes, a little too eagerly which you found suspicious. He did tell you everything there is to know about serving and walked you through it. He didn't get irritated after you accidentally dropped a dish or forgot to add an appetizer a table ordered. Or at least you assumed he didn't since his smile never changed. Though you did notice that waiters who messed up one too many times were taken to the back by Jade. You hope that'll never happen to you.

You pass by Jade as he carries an abnormal amount of plates on his arms towards a table. He nods at you with his smile, not a hint of strain on his face.

"You have a new group at table 13. They can get a bit unruly so I'll-" Jade starts but you take the plates containing drinks off his hand.

"No, I got it! Thanks, Jade!" You tell him before dashing off to table 13. While you are definitely in this for the money, you also couldn't help but want to impress Jade and show him that his training was not in vain.

As you approach the table, you can already hear the group of boys chatting and laughing. You set the drinks down and give them a smile, readying your notepad.

"Are you guys ready to order or do you need more time?" You ask.

"What does it look like?" A blondie responds dryly. The rest of the boys stare at you like they're wondering if you passed elementary school.

"That you're...ready?" You guess awkwardly. The blondie rolls his eyes and the rest scoff, their assumptions about your schooling seemingly confirmed.

"Obviously we need more time." Another says and you nod, turning around to leave.

"I'll be back soon then-"

"Where are you going? We're ready to order." You turn back around to find the blondie smirking. Your hands tighten on your notepad and you fight to keep your smile. How did Jade do this all the time?

"What can I get for you?" You keep your eyes focused on the notepad, hoping that will lower your irritation.

"Can I get...uh..." You listen to one of them mumbling before a loud yelp is heard. You look over to see Jade gripping the wrist of the blondie who is frozen in fear and wincing. His grip is so tight that the boy's hand is turning white. You also find that the hand being gripped is dangerously close to touching your bottom.

"Harassing waiters in our lounge is strictly against our policy. I'll have to ask you to leave." Jade says, still smiling as ever. Though this time, you could see the strain in him, not from fatigue but something more lethal.

"I-I wasn't-" The boy tries to plead but Jade only tightens his grip.

"Wasn't trying to touch them? Well, security cameras will be the judge of that." Jade responds and the boy breathes a little easier.

"And so will I." Jade adds before snapping the wrist of the blondie, causing him to scream in pain. The boy flies out of the booth and stumbles towards the exit, crying as he holds his flailing wrist. Jade turns back towards the group.

He doesn't have to say a word since the other boys quickly sprint out of the lounge. You look between the exit and Jade in shock.

"Uh, well, thanks, I think. That might've been a bit excessive..." You trail off and Jade merely wipes a spot on your shoulder one of the fleeing boys must have brushed past.

"Are you alright? You can take a break in the back. Azul does time them though." He tells you and you shake your head with a smile.

"I'm alright. I only have half an hour left anyways. Hopefully those guys won't be back." You eye the exit but Jade takes your arm and leads you to you next table.

"They have an incentive not to. And if they do," He leans down close enough so that you could see the sharp edges of his teeth, "You'll tell me, won't you?"

Floyd Leech

You sit at your desk in Professor Trein's class, listening to him drone on as you take down notes. You always tried hard to pay focus in classes, which annoyed a certain eel sitting right behind you. He often pestered you in this class and you wondered why he didn't have anything better to do, like pay attention.

As Trein turns around to write something on the board, something soft and crinkly hits the back of your head. You look behind you to see Floyd grinning and pointing at the floor. You roll your eyes as you see a crumpled up paper on the ground. Curiosity got the best of you and you open up the paper.

Bored??? I am! Let's ditch!

You write a big, fat NO over his words on the paper and throw it back at him. Trein faces the class again to lecture and you can practically feel Floyd's dramatic sigh as he flops back in his chair.

"Can I see your notes?" Your seatmate asks you as he peers over at your notebook. You scoot your notes closer to you. Just last week, your seatmate had 'accidentally' tripped you while you were walking up to the board.

"Haven't you been taking your own?" You mutter.

"Yeah, but I wanna see yours." The boy starts tugging on your notebook and you try to pull it back.

"No, would you let go?" You hiss as you try to keep hold of your notes. The boy grabs your wrist to try and pull your hand off but he freezes as a looming shadow falls behind him.

"Wanna use my notes? I've got plenty." Floyd grins, all teeth.

The boy stammers, unable to say anything. Floyd grabs his hair and yanks his head back, staring straight down at him.

"Can't hear me? Should I talk louder?" Floyd asks with a giggle as he pulls on the boy's hair harder.

"Leech!" Trein reprimands. Floyd huffs and lets the boy's hair go, sending him reeling into his desk. You glance back at Floyd.

"You didn't actually take any notes, did you?" You ask.

"Sure I did." Floyd hands you his notebook. There's a couple of bullet points about a new takoyaki recipe he wants to try. He also added some doodles of an eel and a tiny shrimp.

Rook Hunt

You sigh as you write your woes down into a journal you started keeping a couple months ago. A group of Pomefiore boys have been bothering you for a while. They constantly put down your looks, calling it critique without giving any helpful tips nor was any of it even asked for. Even when you tried to avoid them on your way to see the vice housewarden, they still managed to corner you every now and then.

You finish writing and toss your notebook on your desk that sits right under your window. You think things may be better tomorrow as you rest your head on your pillow.

***

You head down the path towards the illustrious path that houses the Pomefiore students. Rook had messaged you in the morning, urging you to come by and see a "most beauté activity". You have no idea what this entails but it might be worth checking out.

You find Rook in a grass clearing just behind the dorms. He has his fingers in a square shape as he gazes at something in the distance. He sees you and gasps in surprise, grabbing both of your hands in his.

"Mon lumière! I'm overjoyed that you've accepted my invitation!" Rook spins you around.

"I can tell," You laugh a little, "What's this activity though?"

"I'm glad you asked! You see, I've been wanting to sharpen up my archery skills. The art of the bow and arrow is simply dur mais juste." Rook tells you.

"And you remember I mentioned wanting to watch?" You guess.

"Exactement! I already have the targets set up and all you have to do for now is watch." Rook takes you further down the clearing and your eyes widen in horror. The Pomefiore boys that have been bothering you were tied up to a row of trees, their mouths gagged and a juicy, red apple sits precariously on each of their heads.

"...What is this?" You ask hesitantly.

"Like I said, mon lumière, target practice! Now stand behind me and watch as I pull the drawstring..." Rook's eyes are hyper focused as he points an arrow at one of the boys whose screams are muffled behind the rope.

"Rook, there is something very wrong here!" You shout in concern. He releases the tension in the bow and points the arrow at the ground. He stares at you for a moment before lighting up again.

"You're right! You should be the one pulling the arrow. Such an eye for beauty you have." Rook sighs happily as he stands behind you and places the bow and arrow in your hands. They shake unsteadily as you hold them. There was no way you were going to be able to hit the apples.

"Rook, this isn't-" You gasp as he uses your hands to pull the drawstring and the arrow shoots forward. You squeeze your eyes shut and hear the sound of four consecutive hits.

You slowly open your eyes and see four arrows perfectly shot in the middle of each apple, no doubt due to magical intervention. The group of boys sob in fear, not realizing it wasn't their heads that got hit.

You take a deep breath and look behind you at Rook who seems as pleased as ever.

"Did you know those guys have been bothering me?" You ask with narrowed eyes.

"How would I know that?" Rook responds with a smile.

"So you just happened to pick them out?"

"I needed targets. Who better than those who can't appreciate true beauté?"

You'll be moving your journal to a more secure location.

#twst #twisted wonderland #twst x reader #twisted wonderland x reader #twst reader #x reader #trey clover #trey clover x reader #jade leech #jade leech x reader #floyd leech #floyd leech x reader #rook hunt #rook hunt x reader

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daemour · 13 days

Text

Pairing: roommate! San x f! yn

Word Count: 10,664

Warnings: cursing, alcohol consumption, smut warnings under cut

Genre: Angst, fluff, smut, f2l au, college au, M for mature audiences

Summary: As the resident fuckboy San's best friend, you're legally obligated to be his hype man. It's only fitting as you're one of the few who can resist his boyish charms. But when he's set his sights on someone you cannot stand, perhaps you need to dig a bit deeper into your feelings after all.

Smut Warnings: masturbation (f), voyeurism, sexual fantasies, oral (f), missionary, protected sex, very slight breast play, overstimulation, cowgirl, some cumplay, dirty dirty talk, fingering, slight body worship ig?, praise, I literally have no idea I wrote it at a time when I should've been in bed so lmk if I missed anything

this is for the jackson wang party fic collab finished with @mingsolo (hella good) @flurrys-creativity (Pygalgia, Effervescent, and Abience) and @sanjoongie (trouble) <3 I still have one more to go but we'll ignore that LMAOOOOO I added too much plot :') flurry was a dear and helped me sort out my thoughts and I managed to write 8k of it in one day lol.

hope u all enjoy and sorry I'm a professional yapper there's no shutting me up

“Going out again?” you ask your best friend and flatmate, San, as he walks past where you’re seated at the kitchen counter, suffering through your essays.

“Yep,” San answers easily, popping the ‘p’ and leaning over to take a peek at your laptop screen. “You misspelt ‘dextrorotatory’, you wrote it as ‘dexrotatory’.”

As your eyes find the typo, you groan and plant your head on the table. “I give up,” you declare dramatically, “I’ll drop out and become a taxi driver.”

San laughs. “First of all, you can’t drive that well. Second of all, you’d make more money as a stripper.” He dodges your smack with ease. “Third, you’re smart and you’ll ace these like always. You’re just a little mentally constipated. Why don’t you join me tonight?”

You think about it for a minute. While you probably do need a break from staring at your laptop, you know how wild the parties San goes to can get from personal experience. And you don’t think it’s a good idea when it's the end of your semester and the final year of your master's program. You just can’t afford to do that. “I’ll pass this time,” you sigh. “Maybe after exam season.”

San hums. “All right. Make sure to take a break, though,” he reminds you, dropping a quick kiss on the top of your head. “See you later.”

He soon disappears out of the door and you turn your focus away from your best friend to your homework. You feel bad for whoever his new conquest will be at the party.

In your opinion, it’s best to keep San at arm’s length when it comes to a romantic relationship. Not that you like him, but you also don’t want to be another notch on his bedpost, and you most certainly do not want to ruin your eight-year-long friendship. It’s not hard to see that San isn’t interested in a long relationship, not right now at least.

You honestly find it amusing that so many girls and guys still throw themselves at him and then get upset when he doesn’t give them a second glance after the initial night. His reputation precedes him, especially in your small town, and yet there will always be a line out the door for him. You don’t even know how he knows so many people.

With a sigh, you clear out your thoughts and refocus on your organic chemistry work. You’re lucky your job offered to pay for your master's classes, but the workload is killing you inside. You’re incredibly happy you’re almost done, and with newfound motivation, you hunker down and start writing out your notes again.

It’s almost two in the morning when you finally yawn and start putting your books away, and it’s almost three when you hear the front door open and the sound of San stumbling into the shoe rack as he always does. “You’re home already, Sanah?”

“YN!” San stumbles his way into the bathroom where you’re combing your hair, wrapping his arms around you and tucking his flushed face into your neck. “You’re still up?”

You laugh, tapping him on the head with your brush. “Yes, but I’m about to go to bed. And you should too, you know.”

San groans, his hold on your waist tightening and his words slurring together. “I don’t wanna,” he whines, “the bed's too cold.”

You sigh fondly. This happens almost every time he drinks, and usually, that’s why he doesn’t drink too much when he’s by himself. He gets too cuddly with people and you’re usually the one to keep him from bedding everyone he sees. You suppose he somehow didn’t end up with anyone in bed and he’s disappointed now. “Do you think you’ll ever ask to sleep with me nicely, or will you just settle for wrestle-cuddling me into my own bed?” you ask, rolling your eyes as San does not answer, just pulling you towards your room. “There’s my answer.”

You’re too used to his drunk antics and just let him move you around. It’s comforting in a way, that he’s comfortable enough around you to do this with you, and it makes your heart warm whenever he throws his arm around you and presses his face in your neck.

You’d never admit it, but it’s nights like this when you sleep the best. With his warm breath tickling your neck, you let your body relax and your eyes flutter shut.

“God, I’ve got a raging headache,” San groans when he sees you enter the kitchen with a mess of bed hair. “I went so crazy with the soju last night, I think I’m going to die.”

You laugh, reaching for the pot to make some oatmeal for him. “Don’t be so dramatic. Why did you even drink so much anyway? No bitches?”

San snorts but immediately whines from the sharp pain that probably shot through his skull. “You’re so mean to me! No, I got no bitches, but that was from my own choice anyway. I don’t want to fuck around anymore.”

Both your eyebrows raise into your hairline. “No? What changed things, hm? Finally decided your one true love is Byeol?” As if on cue, your shared cat meows and curls around your ankles, and you bend down to scratch behind her ears.

“Never had to decide that, we all know she’s the real number one in my life. No, I think I’m interested in someone.” You stop your petting of Byeol, who meows in protest and runs off to pout somewhere. “Come on, don’t act like you just saw a ghost.”

“Who?” is the only question that comes out of your mouth. Of course, San has had a crush before, but he’s never stopped screwing around unless he was actively dating that person. He’s a fuckboy, but he’s not a piece of shit at least. This is new.

“Lee Yeseul. I met her yesterday at the party, and she’s so sweet. She was so out of place at the party, and not in a mean way. She just…has such an aura around her.” San’s voice is soft even just talking about her and you get the feeling he’s being serious. “We’re meeting up for coffee today.”

“That’s…amazing, Sanah. I really hope it goes well for you,” you smile at him, pushing a bowl of oatmeal over to him. “Don’t forget to let me make a speech at your wedding.”

San chuckles, rolling his eyes at your jokes. “Yeah, yeah. Don’t you have study group today? Go there and stop bothering me.”

You ruffle his messy hair before planting a kiss on it and pinching his cheek. He blindly reaches around to smack at you but you dodge him easily, laughing as you head out to grab your keys. “See you later, Sanah. Have a good da-ate.”

San grumbles at you but ultimately returns to his food. You think you can hear him muttering about you being a pain in the ass and you smile to yourself. You don’t have the heart to tell him you know Lee Yeseul…and she’s a major bitch. You sincerely hope she’s sweet to San at least—he deserves the best. But you find her absolutely draining, especially with how often she talks about herself and doesn’t pay attention to anyone else ever. If she cries in your class one more time you think you might smack her yourself.

You still remember the time you had gotten a call that your grandfather had died, and after overhearing your conversation, instead of comforting you, she started talking about how “so many of my family members died in the past ten years.” Sure, maybe she was trying, but you’ve known about her antics enough that it was clear she just wanted to make it about her.

But if San likes her, who are you to interfere? He has a pretty good eye for who has a good personality so maybe Yeseul has changed. You’re not one to stop him. Not that you ever could. When he first started going out to party, you would tag along to make sure he wouldn’t make any bad decisions, but your efforts seldom paid off. You’re pretty sure he must be blessed since he somehow hadn’t pissed off anyone majorly enough to have them call a hit on him.

Shaking your head, you rid yourself of these thoughts and go to the library. There’s no use dwelling on it, the more you think about it, the worse your feeling about his crush on Yeseul gets. He’s a grown man, he doesn’t need you to parent him.

“Woah, who pissed in your cereal?” You should’ve known you wouldn’t be able to hide your bad mood from your study buddy, Hongjoong. Although you only see him for studying, you’re confident enough to call him your closest friend other than San. “Are you okay?”

You sigh, dropping your books on the table. It earns you a harsh ‘shh’ from the librarian which you apologise half-heartedly for. “Do you remember Yeseul? Lee Yeseul?”

Hongjoong’s brows raise high into his hairline. “The professional bitcher? What did she do now?”

“San’s into her, and with her personality, she’s probably loving the attention from the professional heartbreaker.” You groan, glaring at the cover of your organic chemistry textbook. “It’s none of my business if he cares for her, but damn, I wish he could’ve picked anyone else.”

Hongjoong hums, leaning forward and poking at the top of your head. “Look, you’ve been his friend for years. I think you have a bit more of a reason to poke your nose into his business than most. Give it a few weeks, and if it truly bothers you, then you can bring it up to San.”

You sigh. “Maybe.” You say nothing else on the topic and Hongjoong knows not to broach it anymore. Sometimes you wish he wasn’t so smart.

“YN, I didn’t know you knew Yeseul!” is the first thing San says to you one week after he returns from one of his many dates with her. “When I mentioned you being my roommate she told me you were in the same class as her.”

You wince to yourself as you take a long swig of your coffee. “Mmh, I didn’t think it was that relevant,” you say. You can practically hear Hongjoong rolling his eyes at your excuse. You know you should tell him your qualms about Yeseul, especially since the gross feeling in your gut has only gotten stronger. But you’re not sure you want to tread those waters. San’s sweet, but he’s loyal to a fault and probably wouldn’t like you talking badly about Yeseul.

San narrows his eyes, clearly suspicious but not willing to pry. “Well, maybe if we ever find you a date, we can go on a double date.” He moves on pretty quickly, though, walking over to lean over your shoulder and look at your laptop. “Still going on that paper?”

You hum, cracking your knuckles. “Yeah, it’s due tomorrow so I need to pump it out today and then get Hongjoong to look it over.” You lean back, letting your head rest on San’s torso as you yawn. “I can’t wait for this to be over so that I can graduate already.”

San laughs, leaning down to rest his chin on your head. “You’re smart. You can do this. And when you’re done, I’ll take you to a party and we can celebrate.”

You groan, shifting forward and putting your hands back on the keyboard. “Well, in that case, I should get back to writing this.” As you start typing again, you hear the buzzer ring and the warmth of San’s body leaves you as he goes to check who it is.

“Oh, hey, Yeseul! Come on up!” Your eyebrows raise into your hairline and your head snaps up. Why would Yeseul go to all this trouble of coming here? Didn’t they just see each other?

You close your eyes and take a couple of deep breaths before facing the dragon herself. You can hear the tell-tale sound of her voice pitched up to sound more sweet, although it’s grown to be grating on your ears. “Hi, Sannie,” she purrs and you have to refrain from retching. “I was on my way home but I realised it went right by your apartment so I figured I could come say hi. It doesn’t look like you’re too busy, right?”

“No, not at all,” San replies, and you hate how sweetly he talks to her. “YN is in too, she’s writing her final paper. Wanna say hi? She could probably use the distraction.”

No, I don’t need the distraction, is what you want to scream out, but your mother did not raise you like that although you wish she did. Instead, you just smile politely at the girl entering your kitchen. “Hello, Yeseul. Good to see you again.”

“Hey, YNie!” Her cheery nickname for you has your eye twitching. “How’s the paper going? I finished mine a few weeks ago so I’m home free. Just need to submit it.”

“That’s great, Yeseul,” you say, tone slightly more monotonous than you wanted it to be and San shoots you a look. “Hopefully you get a good grade on it.”

“Hey, would you want to join us for dinner?” San cuts in and you can already feel a headache starting to pulse behind your eyes. “I was going to order pizza since it’s my turn today and I’m not nearly as good of a cook as YN.”

“Oh, that would be lovely! I don’t mind whatever toppings,” Yeseul claps happily. The urge to punch her in the face increases bit by bit for you. San nods happily, stepping out into the living room to place the call. After a moment, Yeseul turns to you with puppy eyes and you brace yourself for whatever she has up her sleeve. “Could I trouble you for a glass of water, YNie?”

You try your best to keep your composure as you get up to fetch her a glass of water. She takes it without even a thank you and you decide you’d much rather die than deal with her any longer so you close your laptop with a sigh. “I’m actually meeting with a friend for dinner, but you definitely should stay and have fun,” you say, smiling as plausibly as you can. You do not have dinner plans but you’re sure you can figure it out.

When you go into your room, you’re drawing blanks. You’re still going out, but you’ll probably just end up calling a friend to complain. As you leave the room and grab your keys, San meets eyes with you and frowns. “Where are you going?”

“Ah, I promised to have dinner with a friend so I’m heading out. Enjoy your time with Yeseul, though.”

The furrow between San’s brows deepens. “But I already ordered the pizza.”

You laugh, shaking your head. “I can bring the leftovers tomorrow for lunch. Sorry, I just forgot to tell you, but I really have to go now. Bye!” Before he can say goodbye as well, you slip out the door. The suffocating feeling that is encompassing you lifts and you sigh in relief, but then you somehow feel worse at the idea of San and Yeseul having fun and giggling and cuddling.

You shake your head again, trying to clear your muddled thoughts before setting down to go find your dinner. Fast food was the easiest option, and you figured you could at least sit in your car and wallow in self-pity.

After you receive your order you park and pull out your phone, scrolling through your contacts. You don’t want to call your family because as much as you love them, they can be a bit over-protective and probably will offer to help you find a different apartment and that would be a bit dramatic. In the end, Hongjoong is probably the next best option.

He doesn't pick up immediately, and you’re just about to hang up when the phone crackles and Hongjoong’s voice comes through. “Why are you calling me?”

You can’t help but bark out a laugh at his disgruntled tone. “Hongjoong, it’s a perfectly reasonable hour to call, don’t blame me for your shit sleeping schedule. Are you actually free though?”

Hongjoong sighs and if you focus you can hear the sound of him rolling over in bed. “What’s up?”

“It’s about Yeseul again. She came around today, and it was just…so suffocating. Like, why did San have to pick her? There’s so many girls, and out of them all he picks her? The most bitchy one I know?”

Hongjoong hums. “Why does it annoy you so much?”

You groan, leaning your head back and taking a long sip of your drink. “She’s self-centred, bitchy, and she’s just so fake. I don’t think this relationship will end well, Joong. Clearly he’s just blinded and she’s so manipulative.”

“But why are you so bothered by this specifically? I mean, sure we’ve had bad interactions with Yeseul, but you’re pretty nonchalant about the shit San gets up to and you like to let him deal with the consequences himself.”

You frown glaring at the phone although you know he can’t see it and you pop a fry into your mouth. “I don’t know. It just feels different. I feel like I should interfere this time. I mean, he’s a lot more serious this go around.”

Hongjoong hums, rolling once again as he yawns. “YN, be totally honest with me. This is a shot in the dark, but I think this is pretty important.” You hold your breath in anticipation. “Do you like San?”

“Oh sure, he’s a good friend–”

“You and I both know that’s not what I meant.” You bite your lip, stiffening in your chair. “YN, you need to be honest with yourself. The way you talk about San, you interact with him, it’s not how just roommates, just friends interact. You kiss each other's heads, YN. And it can be platonic, but I’ve rarely seen San do that to his female friends, and I’ve never seen you do that, period. You don’t even kiss me.” His voice turns teasing on the last bit but you’re too shocked to register.

Do you like San? You love him like a friend, of course. But when you think about him being with anyone else, even if it wasn’t Yeseul, something in you aches. When you think about San’s smile being directed to anyone else, you can feel a burning in your gut. The answer is clear, whether you like it or not.

“I…yes. I do.” The confession comes out quietly. “But I don’t want to do anything about it. Like you said, it’s up to San whether he likes Yeseul enough. I can’t interfere.”

You can practically hear the look Hongjoong would be levelling at you. “Why not?”

You shrug. “When San likes someone, nothing can stop him from liking someone unless he wants to. I’ll just let it run its course and hopefully my own feelings will vanish in the process.”

“That doesn’t sound very healthy, YN.”

You let out a despondent laugh. “Sure, probably not. But who knows? Maybe I can find someone else in the process.” You let out a sigh before glancing at your now-cold sandwich. “I gotta head out, but thanks for talking, Joong. I’ll see you in class.”

Hongjoong can barely say goodbye before you hang up the phone and lean back. This is going to be difficult. The more you see Yeseul, the more you know you’ll accidentally slip up and something will tip her and San off. Your headache is pulsing behind your eyes and you take a small bite of your sandwich, your appetite diminishing. You miss being a child and your biggest worry is that San sneezed on your lollipop.

With another groan, you wrap up the sandwich and just go for a late-night drive instead to clear your head. It’s something that has never failed to calm you down and keep your mind level. San always berates you for driving alone at night, but you’d like to say you’re pretty safe. Plus, even he has agreed that it’s pretty calming when—you frown, forcing thoughts of San to leave your brain.

You don’t really know how long you’ve been out, but it’s surely long enough that Yeseul has left. As you carefully open the door, there’s a long silence, and you sigh, happy you made it home free. But as you’re about to call out for San, you hear a high-pitched moan come from his bedroom. And it certainly is not San.

You almost turn tail and head right back out of the apartment when you hear San’s reverberating moans fill the house. Against your better judgment, you take off your shoes and step closer towards his bedroom. His bedroom door is cracked open and curse him for putting his mirror right in view where you can see him leaning back on his bed, his lower half hidden off the edge of it and you can only see Yeseul’s knees.

And in your head, you know it’s wrong. But your heart is beating out of your chest and you can feel heat building in your core. And, well, you’ve always worn your heart on your sleeve. You keep yourself pressed against the wall, staring at the way the muscles in San’s neck strain and the way he moans with every snap of his hips. You’re sure your panties are soaked through by now, and your teeth sink into your lower lip to keep yourself quiet. The taste of copper enters your mouth but you couldn’t care less.

It’s only when San sits up, probably to fuck into Yeseul better and he disappears from the mirror that you rip yourself away and escape into your own room. Not another thought enters your brain as you strip your leggings and underwear off, flopping on your bed and closing your eyes as you let your hand trail down to press against your slick pussy. It doesn’t take long for you to sink your fingers into your sopping cunt, turning your head to bury your face into your pillow.

The guilt in the back of your mind is quickly sent away as you imagine San’s hands fucking you instead. He’s always had well-worn hands, and your brain fogs up as you imagine him leaning forward to mouth at your neck as he fucks you.

Your brain flips back and forth between the idea of him eating you out so well and fucking so many loads into you with his thick cock that your stomach swells and you whimper into your pillow as your core tightens and you come onto your fingers. You feel tears prick your eyes as you get up to wipe your hands of the cream coating your fingers and toss the tissue in the trash. You’re not sure how you’ll be able to face San or Yeseul again after that.

You can feel the shame burning inside of you and you close your eyes and cry yourself to sleep silently.

Waking up is disorienting, your eyes red-rimmed and your bottom lip raw and blood dried on it. You feel like death and you’re pretty sure you can’t attend class like this. You lean over and grab your phone, yawning as you send your professor a text with a weak excuse. You don’t really care how plausible it is, Professor Jeong usually is quite understanding so you don’t worry about that for too long. San had texted you an hour ago, asking if you had come home, and you choose not to answer it.

You can hear mumbling in the other room, probably Yeseul and San sharing goodbyes, when you hear the door shut behind her. Unlike you, she’s probably happy to go to class and tell all her friends about her night with the campus fuckboy.

It takes another thirty minutes for you to finally roll out of bed and put some lotion on your face, hoping for the traces of the questionable night you had to erase from your face. Once you’re satisfied with your appearance, you venture out into your living room where San is standing by the door. “When did you get back?” he asks without even turning around. “I texted you like, an hour ago.”

You shrug, avoiding his eyes as you move into the kitchen to find breakfast. “I only just woke up, San.”

Your roommate gives a short huff, following close behind you. “Don’t you have class? Yeseul just left so you could walk with her.”

You try not to roll your eyes at the idea of that. “I’m not feeling well so I don’t think I’ll go.” “You’re not feeling well?” San’s voice deepens in concern and as you grab a yoghurt, he places his hand atop your forehead. “You are feeling pretty warm.”

At his touch, too many memories of last night flood through your brain and you shake away his hand. “Yeah. I’ll just go lie down for a little. Have a good day.”

Before he can say anything else, or realise your suspicious behaviour, you dodge past him and head off back into your room to hide. “I left your pizza in the fridge,” he calls after you and you just grunt in thanks before barricading yourself in your room.

You lean against the door for a minute before you realise you didn’t even grab a spoon. Unwilling to go back out there, you’ve resigned yourself to licking it out of the container like a cat when you hear a gentle knock at the door.

“I got you a spoon,” San’s unsure voice filters through the wooden door, and you squeeze your eyes shut.

“Thanks, San,” you murmur, turning to open the door a crack and take the proffered utensil. “Sorry for being short with you.”

His lips quirk into a half-smile, a silent acceptance of your apology. “I get it. Just get some rest, YN.”

You close the door again, this time a warm heart in your chest mixing with the guilt you still feel in your gut. You’re not sure how on earth you’re going to get over your feelings for San.

Avoiding San goes well for the most part. You are in your finals week anyway, and you’re spending most of your time at the library or in class. Your college’s library stays open for 24 hours during the last week of school anyways so some nights you’ve just been staying there until morning. Hongjoong disapproves heavily but doesn’t say much about it and you appreciate his support either way.

Avoiding Yeseul proves much harder. She seems to always find her way to wherever you happen to be, interrupting you and Hongjoong’s study sessions with a perfect smile and narrowed eyes. You don’t know what she wants from you, and you aren’t pleased with her presence.

But one evening, you’re about to leave the library to have some dinner when she corners you. “YN, let’s talk,” she says in that sickeningly saccharine voice of hers, looping her arm into yours and pulling you down the street. “I have some things to ask you.”

Unwilling, you try to tug your arm out of her grasp, but the girl is stronger than you expected. She pulls you all the way to her dorm on campus, sitting you down on her leather couch. “What is your relationship with Choi San?”

Her question comes so suddenly you need a minute to register. To her credit, Yeseul waits patiently for you to gather your thoughts. “He’s my friend and roommate?” you say as truthfully as you can muster, although you know it’s an absolute lie, and judging from her expression, Yeseul doesn’t believe you either.

“Don’t take me as a fool, YN. The way he talks about you is undeniable.”

“That seems like something you should be talking to him about,” you say, attempting to get up from the couch but Yeseul just pushes you back down.

“I’ve tried. He just tells me there’s nothing to worry about and I don’t believe that,” Yeseul grits through her teeth.

And you have to give it to her. She did try to come to San about her worries. But the way she refuses to trust him grates on your nerves. He stopped his fuckboy activities to be with her, and yet she’s worried about you, one of the few girls who isn’t all over him at any moment. You arch a brow. “Do you not trust him?”

Yseul scoffs. “Of course not. He’s a fuckboy. But I like the status I get with him. I just don’t want to end up embarrassed.”

Well, that will be inevitable, you can’t help but think to yourself. No matter how much your relationship with San is strained, you’re not about to let Yeseul talk shit about him like he isn’t genuinely trying for her.

“That’s where you come into play,” Yeseul’s smirk turns sharp. “I’m going to call San. Ask him to choose between us. If he chooses you, then I want you to stay far, far away from him.”

You shrug. No matter the outcome, it’s not like you’re not already keeping your distance from San. In the end, you’ll just tell him to break up with her and let him deal with the chaos himself. “Go ahead,” bitch.

San picks up on the first ring. “Yeseul?” He’s cheery and your heart aches at the thought of Yeseul breaking his so easily. “What’s the occasion?”

“Hey, babe, I just have a quick question, and I need you to answer truthfully for me, okay?” At his pause, she takes that as a go-ahead. “Who would you pick? Me or YN.”

There’s a long silence on the phone. “Yeseul, we need to break up.”

Only one thing unites you and Yeseul in this moment, and it’s your shared confusion for San’s reaction. “What do you mean?” her voice turns panicked. “Isn’t that a little far?”

“You’ve been stuck on this, and I don’t know how much I have to reassure you, Yeseul. I haven’t even seen YN for the past two weeks. And she’s my closest friend. I’m not dropping her for a two-week relationship. I hope you have a good time, Yeseul.”

Before you can react at all, Yeseul screeches and points an accusing finger at you. “This is all your fault, YN!”

Your jaw drops at her absolute audacity. “My fault? What are you on? I was just trying to live peacefully when you dragged me into this plot ignoring my advice. I told you to talk to him, to just fucking trust him. God, you’re an idiot. And I’m going home.”

Without another word, you leave, still fuming over that interaction. Couldn’t she just have made the call without you? You’re happy you don’t have to do all the convincing for San to leave her, but that just complicates things for you. Would he really so easily drop Yeseul just for you? From what you’ve heard, he was practically head over heels for her.

With another sigh, you head back to the library. You need to finish that exam.

“Pens down, and turn in your exams,” you hear the professor call, and you don’t think you’ve ever gotten up so fast. You’re so, so fucking happy that you’ve finished your last year and now you’re free.

As soon as your professor accepts your paper you race out of the lecture hall, only stopped by the cafeteria when you hear someone call your name. Lee Juyeon, someone you’ve started growing closer to, waves you down. “Hey, YN, congrats on finishing!” he smiles at you and you can’t help but smile back, the giddiness contagious.

“Thanks! You too,” you say, pulling him into a hug. “It’s so nice to be done.” Practically nothing could dampen your mood, especially seeing Juyeon. He’s sweet, and you have an inkling he likes you. And you’re not opposed to it.

“It really is,” Juyeon agreed cheerfully. “Look, I have to go celebrate with my family, I just wanted to say hi. But hey…there’s this end of the year party on Saturday, and I was wondering if you wanted to go with me.”

And your suspicions were right. You think about it for a moment. You’re not the biggest party person, anyone knows that, but Juyeon is sweet and just what you need, so you accept eagerly. It doesn’t take long for the two of you to exchange numbers and for him to promise to send you more details before he runs off. And through your excitement, you know you still have to go meet with San who’s probably waiting for you just outside. He wanted to see you as soon as you finish your exams, and you didn’t have the heart to decline.

“Congratulations on finishing your last exam, YN!” San cheers as soon as you exit the college building. “I’m so proud of you!”

You’re too tired to complain when San sweeps you up into a hug, just letting yourself relax in his firm arms. After all this work, you think you’ll let yourself indulge in his affection. “Thanks, Sanah. I appreciate it.” You let your chin rest on his broad shoulder, closing your eyes and letting the exhaustion take over you. “Can I go to bed now?”

You hear him chuckle, the vibrations from his chest comforting you. “Yeah, yeah. We can celebrate later. Come on.”

He tugs you all the way to your apartment, dropping you on the couch and quickly curling right up next to you. You can’t bring yourself to care. “I’m proud of you,” he repeats into your hair as he tucks your head into his neck. Your eyes flutter shut.

When you reopen them, it’s bordering on evening. San is no longer wrapped around you, and you can hear him moving about in the kitchen. “San,” you call out, voice raspy from having just woken up. “What are you doing?”

“Ah, I’m making dinner,” he responds, his voice too warm for your liking, your heart beating just a little faster. “Come and eat.”

With a bit of difficulty, you rise from the couch and move to the kitchen, taking a seat at the counter. “Japchae? When did you learn how to cook this?”

San chuckles. “Wooyoung taught me the other day because he was bored. I figured it’d be a nice surprise for you after all your hard work.”

Your lips twitch, unsure if you should smile or pout. “That’s sweet. Thank you again, San.”

As you start eating the noodles (there’s a little too much sesame but you don’t have the heart to tell San that), San clears his throat. “So…I promised to take you to a party.”

You vaguely remember this conversation. “Ah, yeah. What did you have in mind?”

“There’s this end of the year party, it’s supposed to be the biggest one, hosted by Jackson Wang.”

“Ah–” you shake your head, eyes apologetic. “I promised someone else I’d go with them. I didn’t know that was the party you wanted to take me to. Maybe we can do something else on a different day?”

San’s lips turn downward the slightest bit. “That’s okay. There are other parties. Who invited you, by the way?” His tone is casual, and yet you still feel like you’re walking into the lion’s den.

“Ah, Lee Juyeon from college. I think he’s in Hongjoong’s philosophy department, but he’s a year behind. He’s cute so I figured I’d give it a try.”

“It’s a date?” Your brows furrow at the heaviness in San’s voice but you pay it no mind and nod. “I see. Well, have fun.”

The rest of the dinner is filled with silence, San picking at his food and you in no mood to try and dissect his mood. He takes your empty bowl and starts doing the dishes, and you mumble out a thank you before running back to your room. He’s clearly not willing to talk more and it’s best to give him space.

As you lay in bed, you can’t help but worry about what is so grating on his mind after you mentioned your date. You can’t think of anything that would cause him to be angry—as far as you’re aware he has no grudges against Lee Juyeon, much less met him. Shaking your head, you try and fall asleep. It’s best not to dwell on it, you can just ask him tomorrow.

It’s Saturday, and you’re in a foul mood. San hasn’t spoken to you in the four days leading up to the party, avoiding you like there’s no tomorrow. The only saving grace comes in the form of Juyeon’s excited texts, telling you all about his outfit for the party, and you respond with matching enthusiasm. When you meet with Juyeon in front of the large house where the party is held, the thought of San isn’t even on your mind. Instead, you just take Juyeon’s offered hand and follow him into the party.

You weave through the bodies, reaching the counter where shots are being passed around. “Want vodka or tequila?” Juyeon asks, his voice pitching higher to be heard over the bass. Without answering him, you just reach for the bottle of tequila, pouring the two of you shots. “Good choice,” Juyeon laughs, throwing his head back as he downs the alcohol, you following suit shortly.

“You know, I never pegged you for a college party fan,” you lean in, laughing. “Maybe I should hang out with you more.”

Juyeon chuckles, wrapping an arm around your waist. “Maybe you should. I know great party-throwers. Although I’ve heard you’ve been to your fair share, what being San’s friend and all.”

You shake your head, a smile on your face. “Maybe at first, but you know, organic chemistry isn’t an easy major to balance with a party life.”

Juyeon laughs loudly, bumping you with his hip. “I understand the pain. Philosophy falls into that category of majors too. Another shot?”

You take the second shot happily, letting the alcohol burn through your veins as you stumble alongside Juyeon’s wandering through the crowd. Whatever you’re doing is a blur, all you can focus on is Juyeon’s smile and his warm hand holding yours.

It feels like barely a moment has passed when Juyeon pulls you into a nearly empty room of couches, only a few other couples lingering in the corners. “I hope you’ve been enjoying yourself,” Juyeon starts, his eyes sparkling as he takes in your appearance. “It’s been fun hanging out.”

“I did too,” you agree with a small smile, looking up at him through your lashes.

He leans in, and you lean in, and your lips brush. It’s a sweet kiss, one that you lean into as Juyeon wraps his arms around your waist. It’s warm and you smile into it. And then a familiar face pops into your head. You wonder to yourself how San would kiss you, if he would do it as sweetly as Juyeon or if he would devour your lips like it was his last meal.

When Juyeon pulls away for air, you feel guilt burning in your stomach again. Why would you think of other men when Juyeon’s right here in front of you? As Juyeon leans in to kiss you again, you almost move back before a hand grips your shoulder and pulls you into a broad chest.

“Hey, man, I’m going to have to talk to YN if you don’t mind.” You’d recognise your best friend’s voice anywhere, and it only serves to fill you with annoyance. Sure, you weren’t as into Juyeon’s kisses as you expected, but it doesn’t mean you’re thrilled to be interrupted by the man who’s been ignoring you.

Juyeon takes one look at San, and something changes in his eyes. A mix of reluctance and acceptance, and with a short nod and smile towards you, he slips away from you. You turn to San, frowning at the sharpness in his narrowed eyes, not one you’re used to seeing or enjoy seeing. “Why would you kiss him?” he spits, and your annoyance grows with confusion being added to the mix.

“What do you mean, ‘why kiss him’? I told you, San, I was on a date. Why the fuck did you interrupt us?”

“I like you.” Those three words would be a dream for you to hear from his mouth…if you weren’t so pissed.

“No, fuck that. I do not need to hear that from you right now. Not when I was enjoying my night with Juyeon. What was confessing supposed to do for you, San? It’s too late now. I wanted to enjoy this party, and now I have to go apologise to Juyeon for you.” San opens his mouth to speak, but you shake your head, pushing him away from you.

You leave San standing by himself as you search for Juyeon, your mood immediately souring. Why would he fucking do this to you? You can feel tears burning your eyelids and you abandon your search for Juyeon, searching instead for some liquor to take away your embarrassment.

As you pour yourself another shot of tequila, you notice a familiar face, Hongjoong talking to a girl you recognise as someone he hangs out with sometimes. They look like they’re getting it on and you feel a little bad, but you need his advice. “Hey, Kim Hongjoong!” you call out to him, waving him over. Hongjoong’s eyes brighten and he makes his way over, leaving the girl staring after him longingly, but her attention is soon taken away by two other guys. You recognise one of them from the cafeteria but you don’t remember his name.

“Hey, YN, what’s up? I didn’t expect to see you here, did San take you?” Your face falls and Hongjoong realises he stepped into dangerous territory. “Okay, what happened?”

“I can’t believe San is mad at me for kissing someone at the party,” you groan after explaining to Hongjoong the events leading up to now. “Sure, maybe it wasn’t the best move on my part but he’s had like, twenty million one-night stands, and yet I can’t kiss someone else? He hasn’t even talked to me after I mentioned going on a date. And yet he looked positively murderous after he saw me kissing that other guy.”

Hongjoong tilts his head, confused. “Isn’t that what you wanted, though? You like him.”

“I did! I do! But I’m so sick of waiting around for him, and I could’ve had a chance at liking someone else. He’s all over the place, and I don’t know if that’s what I want in a man.” You’re lying to both Hongjoong and yourself, and Hongjoong knows it, raising an eyebrow.

“Honestly, YN, it just sounds like you need to talk to him.” Hongjoong crosses his arms, tapping his foot and eager to back to the girl was with, but also not wanting to ditch you in your time of need. You feel a little bad for pulling him away, but your mind is swirling with so many thoughts, you don’t know if you can sort them out by yourself and drinking to erase those thoughts is not something you like to do. You’re not San.

And speak of the devil, you smell his familiar cologne before his hand lands on your shoulder and pulls you into his chest. You whirl around out of his grip and glare at him. “Get off me,” you snap. “I’m in the middle of a conversation right now, Choi San.”

With one glance at Hongjoong, he raises his hands and winks at you. “Have that talk, YN. It’ll do you more good than harm.”

Oh, you’re going to kill that traitor after the party. You turn your attention back to San, your mouth twisted into a frown. “You make this quick or else.”

San has the decency to look a little ashamed as his eyes shake. “Can we talk on the patio? It’s too loud in here.”

With a dramatic sigh, you grab his wrist and pull him through the crowd to the back door, practically slamming it behind you. You can see the eyes of people interested in the drama through the windows but you pay it no mind. “Speak. You get five minutes before I go back in and you don’t talk to me again for the rest of the night.”

San’s face falls and his lips pull into a pout. But no matter how subconsciously adorable he is, you refuse to fall for his charms this time. The heat of anger is still curling in your gut when you think about the argument from earlier. “YN, come on, I had a good reason.”

You shake your head, ignoring the strands of hair that fall into your eyes. “No, San. Confessing to me is not a good reason to fuck up my night. You didn’t even apologise. You’ve been ignoring me for days after I mentioned my date, and the moment I kiss Juyeon you get all angry and jealous? Be for real.” You pause for breath, glaring daggers into his eyes. “You are not owed my time, especially after that shit you pulled. Yeseul’s jealousy is why you broke up with her, so why are you like this to me?”

San’s gaze intensifies and you can see him actively trying to reign in his temper. Although he does his best to remain calm, if tempers are rising, he can be intense. “YN, what was I supposed to do? Watch you go out with him? Watch you slip from my fingers just like that?”

“Yes!” you all but scream at him. “If I could sit by and let Yeseul take each little bit of your heart, you could’ve done the same! I was going to be happy, San! I wouldn’t have to sit behind and watch you from the sidelines with my heart slowly cracking. But I don’t get that same courtesy.”

You step forward, poking his chest with a finger as you let loose your storm of thoughts. In your anger, you don’t even notice San’s arm moving until it wraps around your waist and pulls you into him. The action shocks you enough that you stop mid-sentence, your finger still pressing into San’s flesh. “You love me?” San leans in, his nose brushing against yours.

You can feel heat flare up in your face as you stare wide-eyed at him. It takes you a moment to register your compromising position and you stumble back, pushing at his chest. “Don’t do that,” you hiss, turning your eyes away. “I don’t like you, San. Not anymore.”

“You’re lying.” San’s voice is firm. “Look at me in the eyes and tell me you don’t like me anymore.”

You don’t know where you got it from. You’ve never been good at lying, not to San. Maybe it was the alcohol burning through your system, mixing with the shame and anger you feel. But this time, you stare him directly in the eye and say the four words that might’ve been the biggest lie in your life. “I don’t like you.” San’s brows furrow and he shakes his head.

“No–”

“Yes, San. You cannot just waltz around and expect me to keep the patience I had for you. I’m sick of being pulled around like a puppet. Maybe at first you didn’t know. But refusing to give me space when I asked for it?” You shake your head, glancing back at the party. “I’m going back in. We can talk about the apartment lease later.”

Without glancing back, you re-enter the house. And maybe it hurts a little that he doesn’t go after you, but at this point, you’re too numb and all you want to do is go home and cry. But home is not an option, not when it would probably be the first place he would look for you. Fighting back the tears threatening to fall from your eyes, you slide into your car, staring blankly at the wheel for a long moment until you feel composed and sober enough to drive.

And drive you certainly do. You’re not quite sure where you’re going, and you’re plenty aware that this is a bad idea, but you just let yourself go around and calm yourself down first. The crisp breeze paired with the warm spring air does wonders to clear your head and paired with the late times, there are not too many cars out. It’s peaceful.

You’re not too sure how long you were out, but it’s long enough for the blurry memory of the argument to clear and you groan, pulling over to park by the side of the road and let your head hit the steering wheel. You went too far. San had always been the more emotional of you two, always wearing his heart on his sleeve. He must’ve had a hard time with Yeseul, and although it doesn’t excuse him, you never gave him a chance to properly apologise.

With a sigh, you check your phone to see five missed calls and twenty texts from San asking where you are. He somehow even got your neighbours (a sweet couple in their twenties who babysit Byeol sometimes) to ask you if you’re okay. As your finger hovers over the call button, debating whether to call him back, bright headlights shine behind your car and you stiffen. Your hand hovers over the pepper spray you keep in the dash as you press the call button in a panic. No matter what the disagreement was about, you know San would still come to your aid if you needed it.

“YN, open the door. I’ve been worried sick!” San’s voice crackles through the receiver and you spin around in your seat, squinting at the figure standing behind your car and your shoulders sag in relief.

“God, San, you scared the shit out of me!” you scold, leaning over to unlock the passenger seat and push the door open while hanging up the call. “Get in here.”

A haggard-looking San slides in, his eyes red-rimmed and mouth pressed into a thin line. The car that drove him turns and you look back in confusion before San starts explaining. “I wanted to give you space so I stayed at the party,” he starts explaining after a moment. “But I got worried and went to the apartment to find you. But you weren’t there, and I asked all your friends. I’m lucky you left your location on, and my friend gave me a ride.”

You wince. You forgot about turning off your location, although you’re glad you didn’t as it would’ve been more dangerous otherwise. “I’m sorry,” you mumble, turning your eyes to look out the windshield. “I just needed to clear my head so I went for a drive.”

There’s a long period of suffocating silence between the two of you when San finally speaks, his voice quiet. “I’m sorry,” he starts and your head snaps towards him, eyes wide. Of all the things you expected to fall from his lips, an apology is not one of those things. Not tonight, at least. “I was too pushy. I shouldn’t have ignored you, or interrupted your time with Juyeon. I should’ve talked to you like an adult.”

You laugh, resting your head on the steering wheel. “What an astute observation, San. However did you come to that conclusion?” Your exasperation is evident in your tone and San sucks in a breath at how done you seem. “Look, San. I’m sure you didn’t mean it to be that bad. But I’m just…tired. I’m tired of always wondering what is running through your mind, where I am in your list of importance. You date Yeseul, but break up with her over me. You give me the cold shoulder when I go on a date, but suddenly me being on a date is unacceptable. I just don’t know how to take anything.”

Against your will, tears start to drop onto your thighs, streaking down the skin and you sniff. “Shit,” San panics beside you. “I didn’t mean to make you cry.” He hands you a tissue and you take it with shaking hands, pressing your face into it as San tugs you closer, guiding you to lean against him.

He repeats soft little ‘sorry’s and leans his head atop yours, his tears falling onto your hair. The two of you stay in this position for a long while, no words are needed to understand the emotional moment.

“Let’s go home, YN,” San mumbles, his voice vibrating deep in your heart. “Let’s go home and we can talk tomorrow.”

You sniff again, tears run dry as you sit up and wipe your eyes. “Okay,” you whisper out. “Let’s go home.”

San stays attached to you throughout the drive home, his hand gripping onto your own hand whenever he can, and quickly wrapping you into a back hug as you walk up to the apartment. “I…cuddle with me tonight?” you ask, eyes flitting away from his face, missing the brilliant smile that spreads across it.

“I wouldn’t have it any other way,” he hums, walking with you to his room, and he lets you slide in first, the smell of his detergent filling your mind and your eyelids flutter shut already. San crawls in next to you, pulling you close.

“Good night, YN,” San mumbles as your breathing evens out. As you drift off into sleep, you swear you feel his soft lips on your forehead but you dismiss it as wishful thinking.

When you reawaken, San’s still curled up, your body covered by his, his breathing slow and gentle. You can’t help but blink a couple of times to make sure it isn’t a dream when his arms tighten around your waist and he shifts. “YN?” His morning voice is as rough as always, rumbling low in his chest.

“Hey, Sanah,” you greet him quietly, leaning up to meet his eyes blinking slowly at you like a cat’s. “Good morning.”

“Hi.” He dips his head to nuzzle into your neck, breathing in your scent. “I should probably explain myself.” His voice vibrates against your neck and you giggle softly at the ticklish feeling.

“That would be nice.”

San huffs, but he can’t complain about your snark. “I like you, YN. I don’t know when I started to, and I definitely didn’t realise I did until I started dating Yeseul. I did like her, but not as deeply as I thought I did. It was so easy to break up with her as soon as she made me pick between you and her. The answer came to me without a doubt in my mind as soon as the question left her lips, and yet I still didn’t realise my true feelings.” He laughs self-deprecatingly, and you stroke his hair comfortingly. “I didn’t realise why I was so pissed about you going out with Juyeon, and that’s why I was avoiding you. It’s a stupid reason, I know. But I just didn’t know why, not until I saw you at the party kissing him. I just wanted to be there instead of you. And I’m sorry, and I understand if you don’t like me anymore, but–”

“I love you.”

His head snaps up to stare at you after your sudden declaration, and after he registers your words a smile spreads across his face. He puffs out a breathy chuckle and you know his answer before he even says it. “I love you too.”

His eyes shine like you’ve hung the stars in the skies, and when they flit down to your lips, you know an unspoken question when you see it. You lean forward slowly, letting your eyes close once more when your lips meet his.

And damn, you were right about how San kisses. In a second, he deepens the kiss, bringing his hands up to cup your face while his tongue swipes at your lips. Shyly, you part your lips and he dives right in, licking into your mouth and biting at your lips.

“Sanah,” you gasp into his mouth, the sound swallowed by his plush lips. “Sanah–”

You repeat his name like a prayer as his lips travel down to your neck, littering wet kisses and bite marks all over your sensitive skin. “Fuck, baby, you’re so sweet to me,” San moans against your body. “Please, please, let me treat you right, make it up to you. Let me worship you.”

You whine as he laves his tongue over your breasts spilling out of the crop top you had worn last night. Any other time you would’ve stressed at how gross the clothes were but right now you could hardly even think about it. “Fuck, yes, please,” you beg when San nips at your cleavage, leaving a mark.

“Ah, already begging for me,” San groans, his hips pressing into your legs. “You’re so perfect.” His voice grows whiney as his sucks on your nipples, making your back arch.

His kisses move down your body until his breath is ghosting over your stomach and his hands are pawing at your pants, shoving them down as quickly as he can. He doesn’t have the same amount of minimal patience for your panties, and before you can react, he’s ripped them off your legs. “Choi San!” you scold, shifting to try and sit up but his grip on your hips stops you from moving too far.

“I’ll buy you a new pair,” San promises before diving right in and sucking at your clit without another moment’s hesitation. Your hips jerk and your core tightens at the sudden feeling as you throw your head back and moan so loudly it’s bordering on a scream

His ministrations on your dripping cunt have you wordless. His fingers are pressing into your hip bones, the sensation making you squirm. As soon as his tongue breaches your clenching hole your hands fly down to grasp at his hair. “Fuck–” you squeal, your legs attempting to close but San just pushes them apart again, busying himself in your folds.

“Fuck, you taste so good,” San groans, the vibrations sending shivers up your spine as he lets his teeth scrape against your clit. You can hardly focus on anything at the barrage of sensations filling you up, San fucking his tongue into you so well. Your thighs are shaking as you can feel yourself grow wetter and wetter against his face.

When you tilt your head down, he meets your eyes as he moves one of his hands to push a finger into your hole. “Shit–” your grip on his hair tightens impossibly. “Sanah–”

“Come for me, love,” San groans, and you let the dam break, screaming out his name until your voice is hoarse, and San licks up your release through it all.

When he finally pulls away from your twitching and sensitive core, his lips are covered in your glistening slick, thick globs of it sitting pretty on his chin. Without thinking, you pull him down and crash your lips against his, tasting yourself on his tongue. San groans as you lick his face clean, shoving your tongue deep into his mouth.

“Fuck, I need to fuck you right now or else I think I might go insane,” San growls, blindly fumbling in his nightstand to pull out a condom as he shoves down his sweats to reveal his hard, red cock. Without another thought, he opens the pack with his teeth, rolling the latex down his length with ease thanks to the precum dribbling down it.

He lines up, the tip of it kissing your hole, when you groan. You’re much too impatient for this, reaching down and holding him steady as you shift your body to sink onto his thick cock. “Shit, YN,” San grits out as you take him deeper and deeper until your cunt kisses his crotch. “You’re too much.”

You pant, shifting on his cock as you try to get used to the stretch. He’s not the longest you’ve had, but he’s thick and the stretch is almost too much. “You’re fucking talking, you fill me up so fucking well, Sanah.” You hiss as you throw your head back, the stinging melting into pleasure. “Fuck me already, San. Or should I go and find Juyeon to–”

You’re cut off by San thrusting into you so violently that you swear the bed shakes. “I don’t want to hear that fucking name out of your mouth anymore,” San commands, leaning forward until his body weight pins you down and your eyes roll back as he starts fucking into you with short, quick thrusts.

With every movement, you feel like you may break apart. You can hear every slick sound, the sound of it obscene, and yet all you want is more. Your previous release coats his cock so well, thick strings of it attaching to his hips.

His arms wrap around your waist, and before you can protest or do anything, he hoists you up until you’re sitting in his lap. You swear this angle makes him impale you even deeper, his cockhead kissing the perfect spot deep inside you. Your head drops to San’s shoulder, moaning against the fabric of his shirt. “Fuck, San, you’re so deep,” you moan high-pitched. “You’re so fucking good for me.”

San growls, pressing a kiss behind your ear. “You’re so tight for me, so much better than Yeseul. I saw you in the mirror, you know,” he whispers conspiratorially and you gasp and clench, snapping your head to look at him. “You’re not as sneaky as you thought, love. Did you touch yourself to the thought of me fucking you so well?”

You whine, words failing you, and San’s hips slow to a stop. You try your best to grind against him but his hands grip your waist, keeping you still. “Please–” you try to beg but San chuckles and nips at your earlobe.

“Answer me, YN.”

“Fuck– Yes!” you cry out, so eager for him to start moving again. “Wanted you to fill me with your cum so well until it was spilling out of me. Please, please, please, fuck me.”

“Hm.” And without any warning, San jerks his hips up into you, biting into your neck like a fucking vampire and you scream, hips stuttering as you come on his cock. You don’t think you’re making any coherent noises, just babbling into his neck as your bones become jelly from the overstimulation.

If you thought the sounds were obscene before, you swear they’ve become ten times worse as you lay limp against San’s body. He’s moving you up and down his cock like a doll and you pant, squeezing your eyes shut as you still feel aftershocks from your orgasm.

“Shit, you’re so warm around me, I’m gonna come,” San moans in your ear, his rhythm breaking as he drops your weight on his cock. You can feel him twitching inside you as his teeth sink into your neck once more. “God, I want to fill you up so badly, but that’s just going to have to wait, my love.”

After a long moment, he pulls out, groaning at your come coating the condom and his thighs. Without thinking, he dips his fingers in the mess and brings it to his mouth, licking it off like it’s the most delicious thing in the world to him. “Come here, baby,” he says in that beautifully raspy voice, and you lean forward, meeting his lips in another kiss.

This kiss is sweet and soft, but the lingering taste of your shared releases still permeates your taste buds. You sigh, leaning your head against his shoulder as he lays against the wall with you in his arms.

“I’m sorry,” he apologises again, pressing another kiss to the top of your head and it’s almost like he hadn’t fucked you like it was your last day on earth. “I won’t ever leave you again.”

You hum, turning your head to pepper kisses over his neck freckles. “I should be the one saying that. I love you, San. And I’ll always run to you with no hesitation.”

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ancientgoddessofegypt · 3 months

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What Do People Like About You? Pick A Pile Reading. Groups (1-5)

What do people like about you? Pick a pile 1-5 Left (1-3) Right (2-4) Bottom (5)

PILE 1 - 'THE LEADER, THE STAR, THE ORACLE'

Your a star! You have a strong aura and people flow right to it. You have an energy to you that inspires me to do more. Others are motivated and inspired by not just your work ethnic, but the power you contain and how you easily express yourself. You don't care about what the next person is thinking. You just do it!

What you need to know? Proving to others that you're the shit does not need to happen! Others can be intimidated and will try you pull you down just so they can pull themselves up. It's okay, your ship won't take because another individual couldn't look into the mirror. Let it go. Be yourself. You're magic.

Signs - Aries, Leo, Aquarius, Libra , Capricorn Placements.

Animals - Monkeys, Swans, Parrots, Butterflies.

PILE 2 - ' HOPE. A DREAMER. THE MYSTIC'.

Your aura is magnifying. Hypnotizing. Eccentric. People gawk at you from afar, even when you're not noticing. Angels & Spirit guides are all around you're aura n' people take a liking to your energy. You just have this mystifying presence and you could also be really good at knowing/seeing things others typically wouldn't find out. Which makes you quite interesting. You have this quiet cool persona, very jazzy, stay out the way type of person. But listen, we see you ok? Could be an artist or someone who's very soft in your personality but very cute and open to conversation.. when they wanna be! <3

What you need to know? Best believe we love what you got on!!!! Your outfits, your style, makeup, jewelry girl EVERYTHINGGG looks good on you! You just have it going on ok? So don't feel bad and stop nitpicking at yourself!!! K? <33

Signs - Scorpio, Pisces, Cancer, Taurus, Gemini Placements.

Animals - Frogs, Cattle, Kittens, Shrimp.

PILE 3 - 'THE SUCCESS, THE MOTIVATOR, THE ONE WHO GOT IT ALL!'

You're a dream come true to people. People LOVE you because you are a powerhouse. You put a lot of effort into getting where you are and you enjoy putting the work in. Even when its hard, you don't quit. You have this powerful energy that brings people to there knees, and forces them to look within and find ways to do better. Beyonce Energy. You have the perfect smile and you radiate warmth.

What you need to know? Choose yourself. Don't let everyone into your space. People can be users at this time, especially because they know they could benefit off of you. If you be quiet about some of the things you possess, or any wins you make early on, the better the flow & the blessings. Choose yourself. Repeat it to yourself. Your energy is not to be toyed with. Be open to more companions this era! You're the hottest thing out right now mami ;)

Signs - Virgo, Leos, Taurus, Libra Placements.

Animals - Chickens, Lions, Bears, Tigers.

PILE 4 - 'THE ILLUMINATOR. THE SHINER. THE SUN.'

You are the moment. The world truly revolves around you, doesn't it? People like to be around your presence, it just makes them glow more when their around you. You're like Regina George, its the aura. Not that your a mean girl, but I mean... you could be! You get your way a lot, or you can make a way when there isn't one. People like you because your vibe gives them a sense of familiarity and you just feel good to the spirit. You could be very popular or aspire to be. People know of you before you even think of them or meet them for yourself. Could have a lot of stalkers especially people who watch you verrrrry often on social media. Your light is just amazing, so I can't blame them.

What you need to know? You have a dark power to you. The one that magnetizes anything it touches. You could be a celebrity if you wanted, don't hide from the spotlight. You've got a gift that could need tuning, but you're learning to accept yourself because this is what people need and they LOVE it. Have a blessed day!

Signs - Sagittarius, Virgos, Leo, Scorpio, Cancer, Aquarius Placements.

Animals - Bats, Moose, Tigers, Black Cats, Elephants, Ants.

PILE 5 - 'THE ORIGINATOR. THE ONE WHO STARS IT ALL.'

You're aura is sensational. People take to you because of your unique qualities you possess. You're not for everybody, and nor do you try to be. You have a healing presence that some people it kind of shocks them, they can't help but to fall in love or to hate. No in between. It's very interesting really. People like you because you're energy is a gift. Its highly valuable. Some people like you from a distant because they know they couldn't 'keep' you or something about you is too much for them. OR they feel is though they aren't enough for you. You have a very strong aura and can push boundaries easily and people like you for how bold you are. You shake shit up even when the earthquake is already starting its power trip. You're a force of nature.

What you need to know? You have a gift that needs to be nurtured. You we're brought to earth to follow your dreams, and focus on the desired path. Your energy is in need of a shift and you should cut out any foods and drink that isn't serving the body good. Be more open to physical activity, and go slow with it. I see something totally different from the usual workout routines and such. Find something that feels like 'you'. Hope this helps :)

Signs - Geminis, Aquarius, Leos Placements <3

Animals - Lizards, Goats, Owls, Dolphins, Sea Creatures. <3

#pick a pile #pick a cartoon #pick a card #tarot #astrology #astrology signs #oracle #psychic healer #channeler #mystic #mystique

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lovelybrooke · 3 months

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Since my hazbin hotel concept didn't really go over the characters reactions to the readers dissaperrance, I thought I'd go over it here.

masterlist

---

Charlie

Charlie is so, so very sad. She doesn't know what she did wrong, why would you leave? Part of her wonders if it's her, if it's the hotel, maybe she did something wrong and now you're gone.

Charlie devotes all her time into finding you, you have to be somewhere. But after days and days of looking and finding nothing, not even a trace, she starts to feel like it's hopeless.

Charlie switches between intense depression and motivation constantly. She'll spend weeks in her room, alone, only letting Vaggie in. Then, suddenly, she'll burst out and demand that they get on with the search. It's like she's a completely different person, but deep down, everyone can tell that she's racked with guilt.

She just has to find you, she'll even get his dad to help if it comes to it. It doesn't matter, whatever it takes. She just wants to apologize for...whatever she did. Once you're back in the hotel, she'll make everything right, so right that you won't want to leave again.

Vaggie

Vaggie is well...Vaggie. She's conflicted. She doesn't know whether to feel afraid, upset, worried. It's too many emotions to shift through, too complicated. Because of these complicated feelings, she has a hard time being there for Charlie. She want's to help with the search, she really does, but at the same time she doesn't want to have to accept the fact that you truly are gone.

Lucifer isn't even able to find you, Alastor isn't even able to find you. You have to bee somewhere far away to stay out of there reach. The longer you're gone, the longer she's left wondering what made you leave. In your last few days at the hotel you were distant, like mentally. You were incapable of paying attention to anyone or anything, and thinking back on it, she should've known something was up.

She feels ashamed for being so guarded around you, for making it seem like she was weary of you. She was, but the point still stands. You're a nice kid, way too nice to be in hell. Maybe heaven realized that, and sent you back to where you belonged. No--

She won't have that, that isn't right, and it's not fair. It's not fair to Charlie, it's not fair to her, it's not fair to anyone else. You shouldn't just get to dig yourself into everyone in the hotel and then get ripped away when they finally accepted it. It's not fair.

If it was heaven that took you from them, she'll make them pay.

Angel

Angel wants closure.

He gets why you left, he really does. You're too good for this place, for all these people, and so you left, he gets it. What he wants is for you to tell him to his face that it wasn't his fault.

He looks back on his interactions with you, him closing himself off only to welcome you in at the very last moment, the moment where he craved friendship and stability the most, only to then push you away when you needed him. You were struggling, with--something.

Something he has no understanding of. He can't decipher anything behind those blank eyes, he can't figure out what your monotone words mean, and it worries him. He wants to be there for you, offer you comfort, anything.

But he knows he'll just ruin you more. He'll say something, do something, and you'll leave him, you'll hate him. He'll infect you, ruin you, until you're nothing more than a shell of what you used to be, and he hates the thought.

But it doesn't matter now, because even after keeping you at arms length, after depriving himself of you, you still leave, and all he's left with is the pain of not knowing. Not knowing if he did something, if he hurt you, if this is his fault.

But what hurts the most is the pain of not knowing if he could've done something, said something, did anything other than wallow in his own pity and desperation.

Maybe if he did you'd still be here. But he'd never know, would he.

Husk

Husk immediately assumes Alastor is to blame.

That Radio Demon is up to something, he's been gone for days since you left, doing whatever the fuck. He assumes, hopes, that Alastor is looking for you, because if anyones to find you its him. But of course, Alastor tells him nothing. So all he can do is hope.

Hope that you're somewhere safe, somewhere good. He hopes that there's someone nice taking care of you, or that you're at least taking care of yourself. He hopes that you're happy, and healthy, and everything else a kid should be. Because ultimately that's all Husk has, is hope.

He wonders what he could've done, if anything. He wonders what Alastor is going to do, if anything. He wonders what's going to eventually happen when they don't find you, and you're gone, and everyone just has to accept that you're not coming back. He wonders if that's even possible.

Because as a bartender he watches as Angel drink his days away, and as Charlie slaves away with searching for you, and as Vaggie spends all her time in her head.

And when Alastor is at the Hotel, he watches as he converses with Charlie, both of them talking in hushed whispers. He can hear the static, and the screams, and the pleas as Alastor demands to know how you haven't been found. And for a second, he sees worry in Alastor.

And in turn, Husk worries, because if you, and you disappearing, is so easily capable of making Alastor lose his composer, than something must be wrong. If Alastor isn't able to find you, and it's making him worry then it must be serious, it must be real.

But even so, Husk hopes. He hopes you're safe, and happy, and healthy. Because now there's the possibility that you're not coming back, and Husk has nothing left but hope.

Alastor

Alastor knew something was up with you.

From the moment you appeared in Hell, he knew you weren't right. You were too...alive for a demon. You were too naive for someone in Hell. You were too human.

For a while, there was nothing Alastor could do to prove his thoughts and honesty, he didn't want to. It was fun, watching as you stumble about this world completely unaware of what you've gotten yourself into. You're interesting, and you intrigue him. You should be proud, that's not something most can do.

But as your stay in hell lengthens, his feelings for you a mudded. His intrigue is turned into obsession, an obsession for you naivety, for you humanness. It makes him wonder how, or why you're down here. What you must've done to be placed here, even if you are somehow alive.

Alastor hasn't felt like this in a long time, and a part of him despises you for it. He hates the feelings that washes through his chest when he's around you, almost paternal like. He hates the way he faltered when he was told of your disappearance. And he hates the anger that course through him after weeks of not being able to find you.

Alastor looks everywhere, in every corner of Hell for any sign of you, and comes up with nothing, and it enrages him. It's an emotion he's more familiar with, rage, and for some reason hates it.

Because this type of rage is only direct at people who take you from him, this type of rage means you had the gaul to leave him. But this type of rage is the thing motivating him to keep searching and he looks forward to when you back with him.

Because you will be back with him, and the rage will be gone, and instead be replaced with that sweat, unfamiliar obsession that he's come to crave.

#yandere x reader #platonic yandere #soft yandere #yandere hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel #platonic yandere hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel x reader

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q1ngqve · 3 months

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hi!! same anon here you dont have to take this as a request bc i just wanted to get this out of my chest yandere or at least obssesive averatio where both overstim the hell out of reader (lowkey mindbreak if you're comfy about that??) after reader rejects their advances NOT OUT OF HATE or anything but bc their insecurities got the best of them and either thought the two were just messing w them or they have abandonment issues (i do not have the second one whatever do you mean i am not projecting do not percieve me) no offense to these two but they look like the ppl to mess w your heart n leave you to rot

mb some predator/prey (they both hunt you down after you avoid them both and as ratio wisely said "what do you do with a cornered prey? hunt it to death" AUGHAHSGA) aphrodisiacs, drugging, etc. anyways after that you best bet you'll be too dumb to ever think of something as stupid as that, and sure, yes ratio hates idiots but well..... you will be the only exception given how cute you look all fucked out and broken on their bed with their cocks deep inside you <3

SKLDJALSDJAL HELP i feel awfully embarrassed w writing this lmao scuse me while i bleach my head.

i am very sorry this took so long </3 i wrote this as a fic at first but i lost motivation so now it’s just in the form of brain rot :(

oh no :( poor reader with insecurities from your past relationships thinking every man out there is a liar, especially the two that gave their hearts to you :( running away from them is a smart move because we don’t trust men in this household!

but you forget how annoying they can be when it comes to getting what they want, and they want you (´▽｀) so don’t be surprised when you find yourself feeling scared out of your mind walking home alone and feeling like you’re being watched! or when you find certain luxury items randomly appearing in your room! or the slightest hint of their cologne when you wake up every morning! because you asked for this by running away 😵‍💫

this was supposed to be holiday for you — coming to penacony, but the headache and blurry room before you has you panicking! you best know that no one is coming to save you when you’re running through the reverie hotel like a lost bunny when you receive a letter saying they’ll have you tonight! and if you think you had any chance of escape, you’re so wrong 😖

oh, and don’t let them know that you’re afraid, it only spurs them on! hunting you down through the corridors of the hotel is so adrenaline inducing for them <3 running shouldn’t be so hard though, so why do you feel as if your legs are going to give out any second? oh right, the drink! they probably drugged it, seems like something they would do

an exasperated gasp leaves you when you finally let your body fall, eyes closing, preparing for impact. and the next thing you know you wake up, hands tied above you to the headboard, your body completely bare. you’d struggle with all your might, soft whines sounding at the back of your throat when you spot the two of them hiding in the shadows, staring down at you with those bright, lust-filled eyes

oh, you’re so dead

your body feels like it’s on fire, desperately needing release, needing someone to touch you, anyone. your voice betrays you as whimpers leave you when they stalk towards you, their burning gaze not helping with the burning sensation.

you really did think you could escape! so why’re you here, tied and unable to move? tears fall as you lock eyes with veritas ratio, your fight or flight kicking in when he reaches out to caress your cheek, wiping the tears away. laughter sounds from aventurine on the other side of the bed, you’re just so naive! all he wants to do is to love and break you until you’re a sobbing mess beneath him 😵‍💫 so don’t blame him when he kisses you, he just can’t help it anymore, not when you’re already shaking when all they did was drug your drink and reveal themselves to you after months of stalking :(

the aphrodisiac is making you incredibly sensitive to their touch, which is perfect for them because that would mean hearing your sweet cries of pleasure! you best prepare yourself though, because they’re not stopping until you’re about to pass out 🧎🏻‍♀️ they haven’t had you for months, nobody is going to stop them from worshipping you, not even yourself.

you’ll be so overstimulated by the end of the night that even just innocent touches can have you whining and trembling like a leaf (^^)

“you really think you can run from us?” — veritas ratio

“who you knew you were so filthy, hmm? you wanted us to hunt you down, didn’t you? dirty, dirty girl.” — veritas ratio

“missed you so much, pretty girl.” — aventurine

“stop? now why would we do that? you’re clearly enjoying this. look at you, making such a mess on my cock.” — aventurine

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oraclemoontarot · 4 months

Text

pick a photo : what do people like about you? - tarot reading ★

disclaimer - these are general readings, only take what resonates and leave the rest!! this reading is only meant to be for fun ♡

from top -> 1 - 2

from bottom -> 3 - 4

pile 1

you're someone who makes people happy - your family and/or friends may find you emotionally comforting, and see you as a great friend or companion. they see you as generous, caring and down-to-earth. you may also be a homebody or someone who likes taking care of others, possibly cooking for them.

with you around, people feel a sense of zen - a comfort and a sense of peace that is hard to find in most people. you may also be a dreamer or you live in your head a lot.

overall, you are someone who is persistent - you are not the type to give up easily especially when it involves the people you care about.

pile 2

you're someone who makes decisions quickly, you're smart and witty. you have clear boundaries and aren't afraid to speak up when something or someone bothers you. you may have gone through a huge change in either your life or your character. but you're at peace with yourself and you're someone who is also comforting to be around - you give people happiness.

you also have a high moral compass and might even put yourself and possibly others to a high standard. you may also have a lot of experience or are well educated. people respect you but also enjoy your company.

pile 3

people see you as being courageous and adventurous. you bring happiness to those around you - people feel comfortable with you around, they also see you as being someone who is fortunate, maybe with the friends and family you have or with the things in which you have attained.

you're compassionate and full of warmth and kindness. you may be seen as a counsellor - maybe you listen well and provide good advice. you have a mother-like energy regardless of your gender as you're nurturing and caring.

you're confident and know your self-worth. you're also social and quite popular. you may make friends naturally - with ease.

pile 4

people see you as being a dreamer. they may see you as someone who is cute, with a child-like nature to you and they like that about you. it may be as if this is your first life and you’re experiencing everything for the first time. you probably romanticise your life and your imagination might be very vivid, they love that you approach life with excitement.

you might be able to express yourself with words well and you tend to be an honest person, they love that you enjoy conversations and they like how you use words. you should be careful as your words hold a lot of power though - just as they can motivate others and have positive influence, it can also have the power to manipulate others despite your intentions.

people also see you as someone who might have trouble juggling between relationships or a work-life balance, at least in the current moment - you might be really busy or have too much on your mind to keep your ducks in a row. but they like that you reflect on yourself and know what you need to work on. you’re constantly working on becoming a better version of you and they respect that.

#tarot #tarot reading #what people like about you #how people see you #free tarot #tarot community #pick a card #pick a pile #daily tarot #pac reading #general reading #general tarot reading

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moralesluvr · 11 months

Note

Helloo✋🏾 I know it’s late af but I just wanted to get this request off my chest lol. May I request a hobie brown x reader where the reader is doing a “don’t kiss me” prank on him? Just a funny thought

'don't kiss me!' prank ft. hobie brown

♡ pairings & aus: hobie brown x fem!black!reader ♡ summary: you see a prank that a girl pulled on her boyfriend from tiktok, so you decide to try it on hobie ♡ warnings: very sad pouty hobie, reader being a bit of a meanie ♡ a/n: i loved writing this! thank you for your request! ♡ got a request? | masterlist ♡

YOU KNEW IT WAS WRONG.

Okay, maybe not exactly wrong, but it was definitely morally cruel.

You had saw the TikTok while you were sitting on the toilet in Hobie's bathroom, chatting with him about any and everything while he showered. You decided to stay at his place because it was late and you had missed him, so you figured you'd just steal some of his clothes and sleepover for a night or two.

When the idea came into your head, you slumped back onto the toilet seat and pretended you were just watching videos about makeup so that Hobie wouldn't be suspicious.

"Can you hand me my flannel, lovie?" He requested, and you sighed at the use of his slang that you've had to pick up over the last six months. You grab his towel and throw it over the curtain rod. You hear him suck his teeth, "Why do you have to be so annoying, eh?"

You hum with a grin, "Dunno. At least I'm not boring."

Hobie pulls the shower curtain back, and you nearly bite your lip.

This challenge was going to be hard.

The towel that you handed him was wrapped firmly around his waist, his chest glistening to the water droplets that reflecting from the bathroom's cheap lighting. He walks over to you, ready to kiss you, but you stand up and cough. "Um...I'm..hungry. Yeah, I needa' snack."

"Did you not just see what I was tryna do?" He almost pouts, following you into the kitchen, "I wanted to kiss 'ya, then you left."

You grab a bag of chips from his pantry, sitting down at one of his island stools, "Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't notice."

Hobie hums at you, walking back to his room, "Whatever."

You were sure that you had already made him upset. He wasn't always in a clingy mood- actually, mostly rarely- but when he was, he was upset if he didn't get what he wanted.

And although you did feel like you were being mean, you needed to get the prank on video to show him, and to laugh at later. So you rose from your chair and ran after him into the bedroom. He had on simple black pajama pants and no top, his hair pulled up in a bun. He was fiddling around with his guitar while sitting on his bed, so he didn't even notice when you propped up your phone and pressed record on your video app.

You winked at the camera when you did it, sliding onto the bed with him. He stopped playing.

"So why can't I kiss you?" Hobie asked, "Does my breath smell bad? Swear I just brushed 'em, love, so I know that isn't it."

"It's none of those things," you assure him, tapping your nails on the outskirts of his guitar. Usually he would flip if someone did that, but with you, he didn't really mind.

You saw him lean closer to you, and then his eyes start to close, and you rested your palm on his chest as you pushed him away. He gives you a watery-eyed look, "Okay, Y/N. D-Did I do somethin'? Because you're not wantin' to kiss me at all. Talk to me, yeah? Please?"

His big hands are cupping either of your cheeks as he looks at you intensively, and you can't help but break. You lean in, your lips connecting with his. You expect the kiss to be warm and light, but Hobie had a different motive. His right hand left your cheek as he snaked his arm around your waist, pulling you closer to deepen it. A satisfied sigh leaves you as that same hand finds one of your braids. He twirls it in his fingers, pulling away from you, "So now you want to smooch me, hm? What's the matta'?"

You laugh, your head being thrown back at how humorous the situation was to you. Hobie's straightfaced, though, and he's not laughing when you look up again. You cup his cheek, your other hand pointing to your propped up phone, "Look, baby, it was a prank!"

Hobie gives you a playful slap to the shoulder, "Don't do that again, love, yeah? Was bloody painful."

You laugh, leaning in as you kissed your boyfriend.

"Don't worry, I won't." You smiled.

And maybe you wouldn't deprive him of kisses again, but when the time came, you'd definitely be playing more pranks on him sooner rather than later.

𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦 ☻ thank you for reading!

𝐒𝐏𝐈𝐃𝐄𝐑-𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐄 𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓🕷️: @queenesther996

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lowkeyremi · 6 months

Text

Late Nights aizawa x reader

it's my birthday so im writing about the man i share it with (-ε-)

content: post war au, fluff, established relationship

"This isn't good for your health, Sho." Today marks the 5th night he's stayed up past 11 pm grading papers or doing something else for his job.

"How do you think I managed before I met you?" His small sigh meets your ears, and you really want to help him. Seeing out of only one eye is most definitely slowing him down.

"You looked dead on the outside when we first met. Do you want me to help grade papers?"

"I'll finish before one, go back to bed, honey." His eyes meet yours once he hears you scoff. He's draining himself by staying up this late, every single night. His face is lit by the warm kitchen light, one of his hands tugging at his long black strands of hair in order to keep himself sane.

"Shota. I'm not taking no for an answer." You say firmly, crossing your arms to indicate that you mean business.

"I knew you'd say that, come sit down." He gives in every single time. He knows he needs the help, he just doesn't want to admit it.

"Can you read through these essays?" At first you're confident, there's only a few papers on the table.

"Can you?" You nod diligently. You confirm you're willing to help, and your husband gets up from the table and slowly walks toward your shared bedroom. When he does return there's a large stack of papers in his arms. They drop on the table with a thump. He chuckles at your horrified expression.

"Just get through as many as you can. Write feedback on them too, hon." No wonder he's always so tired, you forget that 1-A isn't his only class. If you can remember right he has six periods of classes.

"Is this pile all your class or.." He's sat back down by now and started going through papers with red pen.

"That's 3rd and 4th period. I'm finishing up with 1st and 2nd right now." You click your tongue. It's hard to get started, you don't have any motivation unlike Shota. His only motivation is probably the fact he has to do this.

"Why don't you have an online classroom? It would make grading so much easier." He's probably going to say something about not knowing how to use it..

"I prefer for my students to write manually, because it helps with remembrance." Sounds like something an old man would say. You'd voice your opinion but he'd have a comeback for sure.

-----

"Shotaaaaa, I don't wanna do anymore." Your head is resting on the table, the cool wood on your cheek. He doesn't even spare you any sympathy either, laughing at you quietly. His rich chuckles sound like comfort more than mockery in your opinion though.

"Sweetheart, you've only graded four essays." The huge stack of papers looks back at you from it's side of the table.

"Yeah and each essay had like four to five papers in it. I feel bad for your students." The two of you are going to cuddle. You're determined to make it happen, so before he could even reply, you bounce up from your seat, grab his hand, and tug him towards your bedroom.

"We're going to sleep. I'm not taking any other answers besides "okay" or "yes my love." He clicks his tongue at your statement, but finds no reason to oblige.

-----

"Do you want to know something?" He whispers into your ear cuddling you close enough to feel the warmth of his chest on your back.

"What?" At this point you're only half-conscious, struggling to register what your husband's just said.

"I'm actually ahead of schedule. I can grade those papers loosely throughout this week." He admits with no guilt or shame in his voice at all. What a workaholic.

"Are you serious? So I could have been cuddling you all this time?"

"Yeah, I just do work to get out of my head." You wonder how many times you'll have to remind him that you're his strength and that you'll help him through anything, before he actually believes it.

"If you were having trouble sleeping, you should have told me." His big hand rests in your hair playing with it slowly.

"Didn't wanna bother you." His hand is so comforting that you almost fall asleep.

"You're never a bother to me Sho." Your voice is so soft and sincere that he almost breaks out into tears of joy. He's so happy to have met you.

"Oh." It has finally clicked in his brain, even though you've been married to him for quite some time.

You are his light.

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p1utofairy · 7 days

Text

PICK A CARD: “sixteen carriages drivin' away – while i watch them ride with my fears away…”

★ what will this spring be like for you?

NOTE: i love doing these y'all :,) it always makes me realize how interconnected we all are at the end of the day. just beautiful stuff. take what resonates and leave what doesn't. enjoy!

PILE 1.

hey pile one! i see the beginning of spring started out pretty great for you. there's some communication coming from someone that's been on your mind for awhile now. you could've suddenly ghosted this person or they could’ve ghosted you, but i see you finally gaining some clarity about the situation and finding common ground with this person. you might find this person to be *a bit* much…in terms of how they approach you and just pop back into your life as if nothing happened and there wasn't a pause in this connection – but you can't deny the chemistry between you two. it's like should i stay or should i go?

you're very indecisive and frazzled about this situation, but you need to trust your gut and see the situation for what it is and not what you want it to be. if you know it’s not worth it, let it go. if you feel in your heart that this relationship is salvageable then give it a go…ultimately it's up to you because this person is all in. hopelessly devoted to you by olivia newton-john just came to mind (that's you) and then next to you by bryson tiller also started playing in mind (that's the person you're thinking of) *sigh* you two are really caught between a rock and a hard place.

i think the biggest problem is that they love to talk a good game, but can they back it up with their actions? you need stability, pile 1! don't just accept any and everything for the sake of company and romance – you can always find someone that will follow through and provide you with the love and care that you desire/deserve. i see this dilemma being a big theme throughout the springtime, it might be cliché to say but weigh the pros and the cons that comes with this person – and if the cons outweigh the pros then you know what to do! ultimately, you will prevail.

i can honestly see you getting yourself back out there and receiving some love offers, and that person not liking it. they're really going to try to compete and "make it up to you" i'm hearing lol there's a bit of a love triangle vibe going on here. a little sneaky part of you might enjoy this cat and mouse game and the fight for your attention hehe i'm hearing tell your girlfriend by lay bankz BYEEEE you're definitely giving main character energy, as you should. just make sure you're making the right choices!

PILE 2.

hiii pile 2, what's going on my loves? it feels like you'll be starting off walking on eggshells a little bit. i think you're tired of being let down and disappointed, especially when it comes to love. your energy feels tense like you already can sense it coming, but what i want you to do is breath and relax…put the guns down babe. i feel like some of y'alls trauma/past wounds are preventing you from seeing what exactly is on the horizon – which is everything you've ever wanted. it's like the concept of love and being in a solid relationship has been a big grey area for you for a long time, and you're exhausted from the constant fear of someone breaking your trust or getting your hopes up just to let them down.

y'all are very intuitive pile 2 and i know y'all can see more than what meets the eye – so right off the rip if someone is approaching you, you can already peep what kind of agenda/motivation that they have. now this is an amazing ability to have, but you also have to make sure you're at least giving the person a chance before immediately writing them off. when you know, you know. energy never lies and when you peep a vibe, 99.9% of the time your suspicions will be confirmed in some way, shape or form. TRUST YOUR GUT. however, you should open your heart to the limitless possibilities and understand that what will be, will be, my loves. if something doesn't sit right with you, then don't feel afraid to walk away and let it go. you're stronger than you think, and that's exactly why you shouldn't just allow anyone into your space. it seems rough and lonely now, but by may i definitely see some rewarding changes coming in. you might have some options but i don't see them cutting it for you lol i can see you being like mmm eliminated, eliminated and ELIMINATED! i know that's right! it's like you’re weeding out your garden and making room for even more beautiful flowers to grow.

some of the seeds you have planted will manifest this spring, and i see a particular romantic relationship blossoming. it's like there was this pause in your life and then here comes this dreamy ass person just waltzing right into your life, after all those tests, trials and tribulations. you're gonna be so happy and thankful that you didn't settle for less, pile 2. i'm genuinely so excited for y'all <3 awww this person is literally a blessing that you have been waiting on for a longgg time. you'll realize that everything happens for a reason and there was no reason to worry in the first place, because this was always destined to be. 10:10 on the clock <3 love y'all.

PILE 3.

pile 333 it looks like you might be starting off with a lot on your plate, my loves. you might be juggling school, work, hobbies, hanging out with friends, working out – honestly you're just tryna squeeze in some personal time within this tight schedule. it's been hard on you because you feel like you have your hands tied with so many things…people want you to be everywhere at once, and you simply can't do that.

you ultimately have to do what makes you happy, no matter what and i see you realizing that as you progress throughout the spring. one of your parents or family members might be extremely tough on you, this person might live vicariously through you and it stresses you tf out. you feel like you have to carry this burden that they put on you just because they're family, but guess what? you don’t. pour back into yourself, pile 3. you have so many dreams, plans and goals that you don’t speak about to other people but you need to share your gifts with the world. you will be blessed as you embark on this new journey! will it be easy? maybe not but will it be necessary? ABSOFUCKINGLUTLY. go for it, please. your guides want you to know that you'll be supported as you navigate and try to figure out ways to get these ideas out there and put into motion. you're truly beyond creative and talented, wow.

you're a visionary! so many nights you've cried wondering how and when you will be released from these restraints and be free. your spirit guides want you to know that you have the key, my loves. use it. there's sunshine waiting for you at the end of the tunnel <3 and anyone who has ever mistreated you, or put you down will truly regret it and become so bitter and bewildered that you got away from their negative energy and hatefulness. you will meet people along the way that will truly love you and support you unconditionally. you will start to live your life this spring, pile 3. spread your wings.

PILE 4.

hey pile 4! i think this spring you're going to come to a realization about something in regards to a romantic (or platonic for some) connection. if this is platonic, then you and this person must be REALLYYYY close, like best friends. this person is not being 100% honest with you, and you've been suspecting in the back of your mind that they are hiding something from you. i see them coming clean about whatever it is or someone might expose them and you'll be like I KNEW IT…it's sad though because the betrayal feels pretty deep.

this person might try to make it up to you, and try to smooth things over – but be very careful with that because i feel like they're no stranger to gaslighting and manipulating people. it's giving a 3rd party situation either they were cheating (if this is romantic) or they were talking shit on you with other people (if this is platonic) either way what they did is fucked up and they know that but they think you're naive enough to forgive them and move on.

see the situation for what it is and move accordingly, pile 4. you need to reevaluate the ones closest to you, and see if these are really the type of people you want around you. you're going to be elevating this spring, and not everyone is going to like that. i see you doing your own thing and just being the most authentic version of yourself with no fucks to give! let this be your green light to not let anyone hold you back with their lies and deception, you are going to rise above this situation and feel so refreshed once you see this person for who they truly are. i can see you taking on a new hobby, engaging in a passion project and/or just deep-diving and learning more about yourself/what you like. it's very much needed, pile 4. let it happen by tame impala is the vibe for you this spring hell yeah YOU GOT THIS.

#pick a card #pick a card reading #pac #pick a pile #tarot reading #pac reading #p1utofairy

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thebibliosphere · 9 months

Note

Hi there, ive come from your post about ADHD and emotional disregulation, firstly thank you so much for putting it into words, its such a complicated part of how i deal with emotions and i havent ever been able to articulate how to why.

Secondly, in that post you mentioned how you've used stress as a motivator and how eventually your stress regualtion broke, i was wondering if you'd be willing to talk about that? (If not, its not a problem)

I feel like the same thing has happened to me but until i read your post i had no idea that something had... snapped? I suppose? I struggle with motivation all the time and in the past id have a week or a few days left and id be able to suddently push myself very hard to complete whatever it is before the deadline, just barely making it in most cases. However now it seems that i can't find that motivation anymore, deadlines come and pass and i can't being myself to work on anything, and i just end up spiralling into shame and guilt. That motivation was the only thing that I was able to rely on sometimes for things like uni, and i conviced myself that it was just me growing lazy or trying to get out of responsibility as to why the "last minute panic-mode" doesnt work anymore.

Again, if you don't wanna tackle this can of worms or if it's something youd rather not post online i totally get it, its no biggie! thanks so much for making the original post as well, it means a lot

Hello friend, thanks for the message. I'm sorry you're also dealing with this.

The good news here is that I've already talked about this using the rubber band analogy my therapist gave me. (Stress is like a Rubber Band)

If you don't have the mental bandwidth to read all of it now, the tl;dr is "stress is like a rubber band; it can stretch to hold numerous things in place when you need to, but if you do it too often or keep adding more and more strain under the band, the elastic eventually becomes brittle and snaps, taking your mental and sometimes physical health with it too."

I've been in intensive therapy for this for roughly three years now, and trying to piece my brain back together after my last bout of stress-induced productivity gave me a total mental breakdown.

It's... odd not being able to use stress and having to actively avoid it to avoid a relapse. But it is doable. Medication would help, but alas, I've got weird health issues and am unmedicated at the minute.

(And just in case that sparks anyone to go, "Oh, you do all this unmedicated! Wow, that's so inspiring!" as sometimes parents do to me on here as they then tell me they don't want to medicate their kids, I've unfortunately also written a post about what that kind of success looks like from an unmedicated perspective and the kind of suicidal ideation I deal with on the regular because I cannot take meds. It is not pleasant reading, but it is necessary for some folks, specifically anti-med, "if you just tried harder" people.)

A book you may find helpful is Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle, by Emily and Amelia Nagoski. It was very validating for me to read about other people going through the same things, and made me feel less of a "this is a personal failing on my part" and more of a "Oh okay yeah, no stress literally breaks people."

It helped soothe some of my own internalized "I just need to try harder" and helped cement me on the path I was already going down with my ADHD therapist toward changing how I view myself and how I manage my ADHD.

I hope that helps! If you've got more specific questions or I didn't touch on something in my old post, I can try to answer them :)

#chronic health tag #adult adhd #adhd

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tan1shere · 5 months

Text

Fuck me like you're mad at me baby

Ellie Williams x fem reader

A/n: I feel like I base alot of these off of songs but it gets me motivated a lil. ALSO think I'm the first person to write about Resident Evil Ellie mod. So you're very welcome for that. Honestly upsets me that no one has written about this version 😔 but I am here to supply 🤭 enjoy you whores <3

Masterlist

Summary: Ellie works down the road in an office for most of the day. Someone was really pissing her off today so she comes home and fucks the shit out of you.

Warnings: Dom Ellie, rough, strap usage, gloves ;) you'll see. Language, just pure rotten smut ! .... fisting .... 👀 with that being said minors DO NOT interact. You had your warning !!!! Use of mommy. I feel like it suits this and she hardly gets called it. I'd so moan it out I just know she'd bust. Lillll bit of fluff at the end ofc <3

You heard the door open from in your shared bedroom. Most likely your girlfriend home from work. Ellie would work almost all day, sometimes it'd take a toll on her, especially some of her co workers pestering her alot of the time. "Hi baby!" You call out. She comes in, in her usual attire. Long black pants, black fitted shiny leather gloves, with a white shirt, black tie and suspenders. She looks mad. "Ellie?" You inquire.

"Strip. I've had a day." You clench your thighs together at her tone. Finding her more hot as she says that. You nonetheless obey, getting rid of all your clothes discarding them to the side. She was currently attaching the harness, her keeping her clothes on. All the ones you had listed before. That makes you extremely heated at the thought of her fucking you like that. You get down on your knees infront of her, looking up through your lashes. "Fuck. What a good girl." That makes you go insane. You ponder if you should be good or a brat, weighing out your options.

"Suck it, baby." You get pulled out of your thoughts, looking at it and immediately putting your lips around it, kinda wanting to behave. Adoring to be called such things, you start to gently suck it, getting all of your spit around it. Knowing you won't need it though with how wet she makes you. She grunts at the sight of you, you looking up with slightly tired eyes, it honestly makes her crazy. The fact she can come home. Fuck the shit out of her beautiful girl.

"Get on the bed baby. Ass up." You nod, pulling your mouth off her strap. Getting on the bed in the position she told you to get in. She stands at the edge of the bed, groping your ass. Feeling the cold leather of her gloves. "Fuck I missed you today." She says as she lines up. "Missed this fucking pussy. This ass." She slaps it, making you jolt forward slightly with a moan. She holds your hips in place, just admiring your body for a second before she slams into you, rutting against you. Hard. You let out a shaky whimper. "My perfect slut. Being so good for me. Letting me use her when I'm angry. Such a good fucking girl huh?" She squeezes your ass as she fucks you at a relentless pace. "F-fuck.." You let out, feeling amazing.

"God, this pussy is mine. All mine." Another slam into your tight hole. Making you scream out in pleasure. "Fuck. Need to look at you baby." She turns you around while she's still in you, making you swivel on her strap. Still fucking you at an ungodly pace. Making your eyes roll back. "Ellie.. f-fuck.. mommy.." She smirks, part of her blonde hair sticking to her forehead with sweat. "Oh fuck, you're so good for me aren't you. My good fucking girl, all pretty and stretched out for me. Love this stretched pussy. Although.." this gives her an evil idea. Wanting to see it stretched even more. It was honestly her favorite thing.

"Just gunna try something. Fuck I need it so badly." She says pulling out completely. "I know you can take it for me baby I know you can." You're a bit confused but you let out a loud moan as you feel her fingers touch you. "Gunna stretch you out big time with this one. Gunna make you my bitch for this new feeling." She starts off with 2 fingers. Normal. Slowly adding a third. She then sticks her pinky in stretching you out completely. "E-ellie-" You open your mouth at this new profound feeling. But enjoying it with every fiber of your body. You inch your hips into her hand wanting more. If anything this sends her off the edge. She's so glad you're enjoying this. And you're gunna get exactly what you want.

She begins sticking her whole hand in you making you stretch like crazy. Moan like a pornstar. You felt like you were on cloud 9. Heaven. Why hadn't she done this sooner. You relished in this so much it's making her want to cum. But not before you. She starts to move her hand in you, still keeping it as the fist shape. Occasionally stretching her fingers out to hit spots deep in you. You were coming closer by the second. "That's it. Fuck, cum all over my glove. Never gunna wash this. Gunna remind me of how filthy this was. How fucking beautiful my little toy is." You scream out, cumming right when she said that. She smirks. "Fuckk." She breathes. Letting go into her boxers. "You drive me crazy baby."

She slowly takes her hand out making sure it doesn't hurt too much. Carefully taking her gloves off as she usually does when she comes home. "I'm sorry angel did I hurt you?" You gently laugh at her. "No Els I promise, it felt amazing." She sets the glove down in her bedside table. (This woman was not kidding) She then looks at you. "Really? Well that's good to know for future." You smile at her as she takes the most uncomfortable things off, again. Like she usually does when she comes home. Once done, she gets into bed with you, hugging your form. "I love you angel." She holds you close. "I love you, Els."

A/n: another note, I promise I'm working on slumber party! Have this in the mean time but I want it to be special and not rushed so please bare with me it will come! {Just like ik you lovely ladies will do once you read it ;)} anywaysss. Hehe. Requests are definitely still open if you want to request some headcannons I'm sure I can! Haven't done them yet but I will! Or just silly lil blurbs not really full on stories like this. I do have a pregnant blurb I doodled, when I was bored so I could post that. Anyways won't make this long. Have a good day or night MUAH <3

#elliewilliams #ellie the last of us #ellie tlou #ellie williams #ellie williams smut #ellie williams the last of us smut #ellie x fem reader #ellie x reader #ellie williams resident evil #ellie williams re mod

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neochan · 2 years

Text

CHERRY FLAVORED THOUGHTS (M)

PAIRING | perv nerd!mark x popular!reader

SYNOPSIS | you invite mark over to study with ulterior motives and he happily goes despite having the filthiest thoughts of you.

WC | 3.8k

WARNINGS | big cock!mark, lower case intended, he's obsessed with your boobs, dry humping, choking, dirty talk, finger sucking, semi clothed sex, dom!mark, name calling, slight oral m receiving, breeding kink (no mention of kids or pregnancy), get's uncomfortably fluffy at the end.

A.N | this came out of nowhere hehe, but i hope you like! send me feedback per usual pls

"markieee" you drawl, skipping over to where he sat in the library, his textbooks scattered messily on the table in front of him. "i need your help!"

he doesn't look up when he responds, "with what."

"don't be like that! it's serious." you pout.

you pull out the chair next to his and sit down, one of your hands reaching underneath the table to grab his knee. immediately he jerks his head up to look at you, his round glasses sliding down the bridge of his nose. "wha- what can i help you with?" he stutters, pushing his glasses up with one finger.

"i need you to help me study. mr. moon is gonna kill me with this test tomorrow and i can handle d's but not for this class." you wink at him and watch as his face turns a bright red, "plus you're the smartest guy i know."

in an attempt to look anywhere but your eyes, he accidentally sets his sights on your breasts, which were practically spilling out of your t-shirt. he snaps his attention back to your face and grows small in his chair, "ye-yeah i can help you study."

he was just so gosh darn cute when he stuttered. you begin stroking his knee underneath the table, making him squirm in his chair, "okay that's great! i'll text you my address and you can come over tonight."

"wait tonight?"

your face falls, "oh, do you have plans already? never mind we -"

"no" he hurriedly exclaims, waving his hands in front of his face, "i'm free. i'll be over around eight."

"great!" you beam, giving his knee a squeeze before excusing yourself, "see ya then markie." with soft eyes he watches you leave the library, your too short skirt swishing behind you.

mark always thought you were hot, but you were so far out of his league it wasn't even funny, though that didn't stop him from getting lost in his head from time to time.

he knows its wrong, but sometimes when he can't sleep he's tormented by images of you bending over in class, that damn short cheerleading skirt exposing the bottoms of your panties. and the top left little to the imagination too. it was so tight he could see your breasts jiggle when you laughed too hard. oh god, and your lips. it was seldom you were seen without something shoved between them, whether that be a pencil or a cherry lollipop.

mark can feel himself growing hard in his pants. did he have to be such a perv? if anyone found out about the thoughts he was having he'd be even more of an outcast than he already was.

'quit it.' he tells himself, turning back to the textbooks in front of him, and while the thoughts of you have dimmed a bit, he can't help but find himself realizing that mr. moon never assigned a test for tomorrow.

✎✎✎✎✎✎✎✎✎

your doorbell rings at eight o'clock on the dot.

smiling to yourself you leap off your bed and bound down the stairs to open the front door, revealing a version of mark you've never seen before. usually he wore khakis with a button up polo, like earlier in that day, but now he had on a pair of basketball shorts and a graphic tee that read out some scientific formula. he was still his nerdy self just more ... relaxed.

you open the door wider and wave him in, "i'm glad you made it!" you squeal. he stands there awkwardly before taking a hesitant step into your house. he pulls on the straps of his backpack while looking around.

"don't worry, my roommates aren't home." you purr, grabbing onto his wrist, "c'mon i'll show you to my room." mark slowly nods and you smile to yourself, quite amused.

he watches as you walk ahead of him, tugging you up the carpetted steps, the same skirt you were wearing earlier swaying with the rhythm of your hips. your ass looked so good, so round and... fuck.

mark gulps loudly, almost missing the next step when he realizes you aren't wearing panties. he's getting a wide shot of your bare ass, and he doesn't feel bad in the slightest. in fact, all he can think about it is ruining your pretty ass with his hands, grabbing you and pulling you apart while you sink down on his cock. gripping handfuls of the supple flesh while you climb in his lap . "shut up brain" he mumbles, drawing your attention to him.

"did you say something?" you question.

he clears his throat, "n- no, just wondering if you have a bathroom i can use?"

"yeah of course, here" you say, tugging him down the hallway now that you made it up the stairs, and into your room, "you can set your backpack there," you point to your bed, "and the bathroom is the door at the end of the hall."

"thanks" he mumbles, slinging his bag onto your bright pink comforter. he's dreamt of being in your room before and it looks exactly how he thought it would. and it smelled so good, like the cherry lollipops you were always sucking on.

when mark gets to the bathroom he hurriedly closes the door and leans against it, closing his eyes. he can feel the rising boner peaking through his shorts and he feels like throwing up. 'go down. go down. go down.' he chants over and over again in his head. why does this shit always happen to him! there was no way he could go back out there with a raging hard on. for a split second he wonders if he could jerk off really quickly, but squashes the idea when he hears you yell from your room, "come on markkkk! it's getting late."

"one second." he yells back, face heating up in embarrassment. he'd have to use the ole' waistband tuck and hope that it goes down on its own.

"fuck." he whispers.

✎✎✎✎✎✎✎✎✎

you have chosen to focus on everything but the test material you were supposed to be studying.

instead your mind wanders to the way marks fingers delicately flip through the pages of his notebook, and how he sticks out his tongue between his lips in concentration. oh how you wished that tongue was on you right now.

you sigh and shut your textbook, pointedly looking at mark who only glances up, "i'm sick of studying."

"we haven't even studied." he mumbles, softly closing his own textbook and looking up at you, "and anyway, i know there isn't a test tomorrow. i looked through the syllabus and everything.

fuck. he caught on to you, "are you sure?" you scratch the back of your head sheepishly, "i coulda sworn i heard mr. moon mention one in todays lecture."

"y/n. why am i here?" mark let's his eyes wonder to your breasts when you lean over and grab your backpack. they were squished together, jiggling with your movement and he feels himself getting hard again. his mind drifts to the thought of tit fucking you and how pretty you'd look squirming underneath him while he painted your throat and face with cum.

shoving your materials into your bag you look at him through your lashes, "i think you're hot."

mark almost chokes when he hears the words leave your lips, "m-me?" he questions.

zipping up your back pack, you toss it in the corner of your room and lean forward onto your knees, crawling towards the stunned boy, "yeah, you."

"look," he says lowly, "if this is a prank or a dare by your friends-"

"it's not." you promise.

you come to a stop in front of him and stare into his eyes, watching the way his cheeks and collarbone flush deep red, "s- so you think i'm hot."

"mhm." you hummed, "and i want you to fuck me."

marks eyes grow the size of saucers when he processes what you said. he can feel all the blood drain from his face and rush to his dick so fast he feels almost dizzy, "f-fuck you?"

"you sure do stutter a lot." you giggle.

he brushes off the comment, "you want me to fuck you?"

you giggle again and lean closer to him, "yeah ... so will you?"

mark feels like this is a dream. it's too good to be true and at some point he knows he's bound to wake up. tentatively he reaches a hand out, cupping your soft cheek in his warm palm. you nuzzle against him and that's when he knows it's real life. without answering he pushes off the ground and stands up, "get on the bed."

you can feel your pussy clench at the way he commands you like he already knew what he wanted to do; like he's thought of this before. you follow his orders and sit on your bed gingerly, waiting for his next move.

"take off your top." he orders, pulling his own t-shirt over his head and tossing it on the floor.

"oh my god." you whine. who knew the nerdiest boy at your college was built like that. deep set muscles cover his lower abdomen, his pecs poking out a little more now that the shirt was gone. and here you were thinking he was scrawny underneath his clothes.

hurriedly ridding yourself of your top, you let his eyes wash over your body, drinking in what he's dreamed about for months. "you know, i should have known this was a set up when i saw you weren't wearing panties."

"it wasn't-" you start, but he cuts you off by sitting down next to you and pulling you onto his lap.

"it was." he breathes, hands running up and down your back. "and you wanted me to see, right?" you furiously nod your head yes. "that's what i thought. and don't think i haven't noticed how you act in class. bending over so i see your cute little panties and sucking on your lollipops so i think about how pretty your lips would look around my cock instead. you're not slick. you're just a slut who needs to be fucked, huh?"

his words have you rocking back and forth in his lap desperate for his touch, "mark please." you whisper.

his hands fumble behind your back for a second before undoing your bra clasp and sliding it down your shoulders, chucking it to the other side of the room. "that's better. you have such pretty tits." he marvels, cupping them in his hands, squeezing and kneading the soft skin. his thumbs jut out to flicker over your nipples, forcing you to arch up against him.

"god," you whimper, "that feel's good."

"hm." he hums, dipping his head down to take one of your nipples in his mouth. he rolls the sensitive bud between his teeth, harshly sucking while his hands slip under your skirt and grab your ass, pulling you closer to him.

"m-mark." you whine, eyes closed and hands finding their way in his hair, tugging on the roots.

"look who's stuttering now." he chuckles, detaching himself with a wet pop. he stares at you for moment, watching the way your nose scrunches and your lips purse before blurting out, "i'm gonna kiss you now."

'huh-" you begin, snapping your eyes open but mark is already on you, lips softly brushing yours before pulling you deep into a heated kiss. you tasted like those cherry flavored lollys you always had in class even though you hadn't had one today, it drove him mad. you push against him, grinding down on his lap repeatedly while hugging him close, fingers still tangled in his hair. his lips felt like heaven, soft and pillowy and perfect against your own and it made you dizzy.

you moan against him when he pinches your nipple, rolling it between his forefinger and thumb, his other arm wrapping around your waist so that you couldn't squirm as much. slowly he rocks his hips into you, pulling back so that only your foreheads were touching. "god, the things you do to me." he groans.

you giggle and untangle your hands from his hair, grabbing the sides of his glasses and sliding them off his face, "don't want these to get in the way." you lightly toss them on your desk and mark thanks you, "i never thought you'd be like this." you whisper.

"like what?" he leans down and nips at your neck, pressing delicate kisses along the side of your throat all the way to the spot just below your ear. "i'm not all books and brains you know."

"n-no i get that, it's just..." your hands fiddle in the space between your bodies, fingers playing with the waistband of his shorts, "i didn't think you'd be all commanding."

he gives a short chuckle before blowing hot air in your ear and making you shiver, "what? you thought i'd be shy? submissive?" he says the word like it's a dirty thing, something he can't even fathom becoming. "i mean, if you wanna tie me up -"

"no" you blurt, "i like this."

he smirks against you, his nose skimming your cheek and coming to fit right beside your own, lips matching yours like a perfect puzzle. he hovers over yours, "you like this?"

"yeah." you whisper, almost like a secret.

"what about this?" mark reaches around your body and pulls you back down against him, this time matching you and rutting up against your bare sex. a breathless gasp flies from your lips when he gently swivels his hips, the outline of his cock rubbing against your folds. you're pretty sure if he looked there would be a wet patch on the front of his shorts.

"shit." you moan, holding on to him while he continues to grind against you.

"you're so needy, huh?" he grins, pressing his lips to yours and melding into a kiss that has your legs shaking around him. his tongue swipes your bottom, teeth snagging and drawing you in. you whimper into the kiss and he does the same, loving the way you feel in his arms. he pulls back a bit, mumbling against your lips, "wanna feel it?"

"please." you groan, hopping off his lap and settling yourself on the bed, leaning down so that you were pretty much eye level with the front of his short now that he was stood in front of you.

mark still can't believe this is happening. was this a sick prank? a joke? was he sure he wasn't dreaming? here he had you eagerly awaiting his cock. it just didn't seem right, the divine universe had to have some explanation for this. 'shut up' he groans in his head.

slender fingers wrap around the waistband of his shorts and pushes them down so that they pooled around his ankles.

"no fucking way."

mark lee was huge. his cock sprung up against his abdomen standing tall and rigid, pretty pink tip collecting droplets of precum. he was thick too, a nice size that would feel heavy in your mouth if you took him there.

"what?" he asks, blushing and fighting the urge to cover himself, "i know it might not be that big-"

"not big??" you splutter, eyes incredulous at the sight in front of you, "it's fucking huge mark."

the compliment goes straight to his dick and now instead of fighting the urge to cover himself, he's fighting the urge to push you back on the bed and fuck you till you were screaming his name. "put it in your mouth then" he groans, taking a step towards you, "lets see if it can fit." your hand shoots out from under you and wraps around his length, warm and pulsing in your hand, his hips stutter into your touch.

"shit." he whispers, watching the way your tongue darts out to taste him, his hand stroking your hair, eyes twinkling with adoration, "don't just lick it. open up." you do as he says and open for him. he pushes into your mouth slowly until you're gagging and can't take any more, mouth too full, but with one look you realize you hadn't even gotten half way down his length. "that's it baby? god you're even more pathetic that i thought. can't even properly swallow my dick?" he pulls out, allowing you to catch a much needed breath, "lets see if your pussy can take it all instead." he pushes you backwards and climbs overtop you, knocking your thighs apart with his knee.

your mind is reeling from everything that's happening. it's been so much better than you could have imagined. he was bigger, cockier and sexier with his nose out of his books and clothes off. no one would believe you if you told them about tonight, not even your roommates.

mark shoves your skirt up until it's bunched around your waist, "mind elsewhere?" he questions, one of hands wrapping around your throat and squeezing slightly, "you thinking about someone else?"

"n-no mark, i'm thinking about you." you whine, hips lifting off the bed in anticipation.

"good. pay attention."

his hand guides himself, rubbing the tip against your clit before sliding it down between your folds. teasingly he barely pushes the tip in before pulling away. "mark!" you whimper, but all he does is squeeze your throat a bit tighter, "please" he pushes the tip in again, this time looking in your eyes, and he doesn't pull out. he thrusts into you, all the way in and you feel like you're losing it. your eyes flutter into the back of your head, nails finding his shoulders and gripping the soft skin, surely leaving marks. "f-fuck you're so big!'

it was slightly uncomfortable but the second he moved you felt overwhelming pleasure jolt through you, "mm, i knew you could take it." he grins, shallowly fucking into you, "and you're so fucking tight. gonna make me go crazy."

you squirm in his grip, "fuck me, please."

"whatever you say baby."

his hand leaves your throat and grabs at your waist instead, using the skirt secured around it as leverage. he wastes no time in slamming into you, thrusting with such fervor you can feel yourself losing your mind. "shit!" you squeal, nails digging even deeper into his shoulders. his eyes glance down, admiring the way your tits jiggled every time he pushed his hips into you. "right there, right there! god you're fucking huge." you scream, covering your face with your hands.

"look at me," he growls, and you have no choice but to move your trembling hands. two fingers press against your lips and into your mouth, gagging you. "if you can't take my cock down your throat, might as well suck on my fingers." his breathy is shaky when you swirl your tongue around his digits, sucking slightly and feels like he's going to faint. your pussy is sucking him in, walls spasming with each of his thrusts, and your gagging around his fingers. he wonders if you feel full. maybe next time you'll let him toy with your ass a little bit, so then you'll really feel full. 'get out of your head' he chastises himself. there might not even be a next time. after all, he was fucking one of the most popular girls at his college, he was kidding himself if thought this was gonna happen again. guess he had to make this time count.

"spread your legs a little bit more baby," when you don't he ends up pushing you thighs apart, finger digging into your skin and leaving indents. your head moves from side to side, legs shaking in marks grasp, "baby you're acting like you can't handle it. you're the one who asked me to fuck you!" he chides, laughing coldly.

"i can handle it!" you buck up against him, chasing your the knot that was tightening in your stomach.

"damn right you can." mark loves the way you fall apart underneath him... because of him. "just keep taking my fat cock baby. i bet you've wanted this for so long, huh?"

"i think about it every time i see you in class," you huff.

mark didn't care if you were lying just to please him, it makes him feel good. the fact that you've both thought about this and now it was finally happening. his thrusts become sloppy, hands roughly grabbing a handful of ass and tits, squeezing and massaging them.

"i think i'm gonna cum baby. ah shit, i'm gonna cum." he moans, hips stuttering into you.

"fill me up markie, pls i want it so bad." you whisper, the pet name being what he needs to finish, milky ropes of cum flooding your pussy in a way that has you following suit, the knot in your tummy unraveling. he holds eye contact with you the entire time, his brows drawing up in ecstasy when he watches yours disappear. when he's spent, he falls onto you, caging you in his arms. you pull him close for support, shallow thrusts into your cunt helping you ride out your orgasm. at one point he tries to move but you keep him there, tightening your arms, "please, don't move."

"i won't." he promise, "i won't, i'm here." he chuckles against the side of your neck, wet kisses being placed where he's buried in your arms, "the way your eyes roll back into your head when you cum is fucking hot."

you giggle, "thank you markie."

"so.." he questions, peaking his head up but still staying in your arms, "this wasn't a dare or something?" he still felt like this was too good to be true.

"mark!" you swat his shoulders and air hisses between his teeth.

"okay okay." he sighs defensively, "then i guess you wouldn't mind me taking you on a date?" you hesitate a bit and immediately he's apologizing, "we aren't from the same social circles, i know that but-"

"shut up mark. i don't care if we don't hang out with the same people. i genuinely like you." you smile at him.

"then ..."

"i would love if you took me on a date." he grins back at you before burying his head back into the crook of your neck. "who knew nerds fucked so good?' you blurt out, laughing.

"not nerds plural. just me." he mumbles against your skin.

it felt nice just laying in his arms, basking in the after sex glow with the boy you've been crushing on for ages. "we should get cleaned up, huh?" you whisper and he sighs against you.

"let's stay like this for a few more minutes. i like the way you smell... like cherries."

you smile to yourself, "just for you."

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