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#im probably wrong but if i am its someone doing a DAMN good impression of michael hogan
klinejack · 2 years
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now that ive watched it a few times anyone wanna tell me why this is supposed to be the nogitsune talking but it soudns like gerard but like he turned into some kind of slug?
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dorotheataylor · 8 months
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Begin Again
Pairing- Fred Weasley x Fem!Reader
Summary- Based on Begin Again (Taylor’s Version) by Taylor Swift <3
Warnings- Slight angst, kissing, a lot of Fluff and as always my poor english :)
Word count- 1.6k
A/N- Long time no see people. So here I am with a Fred Weasley fic coz I love this dork sm. Also this happens after the war and yes Fred is alive coz he never died (im delusional)
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It was Wednesday, probably your least favourite day of the week. You were getting ready for work, deciding to wear heels for today.
“Don’t wear them, they don’t look good on you.” Your ex-boyfriend would have said if he were here. You sighed and looked into the mirror.
“But I look good in them.” You smiled at yourself before leaving. You decided to walk to the ministry for today rather than apparating, stopping by a cafe to grab a quick morning coffee for a head start for the day. Your headphones played a song you loved.
“I don’t get this song.” Your ex-boyfriend would’ve commented if he were here. You shook your head and smiled through the song.
“But I do.”
As you walked towards the cafe, you suddenly bumped into someone who was much taller than you. The things they were carrying dropped on the floor as you quickly bent down to pick them up, removing your headphones from ears to your neck, apologies never stopping to leave from your mouth.
“I’m really sorry for not paying attention, hope I didn’t break anything.” You said, finally looking at the stranger’s face as you gave them the last thing you picked.
It was a man. A really good looking and tall man. He had red hair, which were perfectly messed up, his smile looking genuine as he smiled at you.
“It’s alright.” The handsome stranger said, “I hadn’t been paying attention as well. Reckon its partly my fault too.”
Damn, you could listen to his voice forever if you could. It was as clear as crystal water, as smooth as silk.
If it had been your ex-boyfriend, he would’ve gotten mad. Mad that because of you he dropped his things. He would’ve cursed at you, maybe even yell. You shook your head and quickly came out of your thoughts.
“Guess we’re both sorry then.” You said, trying not get awkward. He chuckled and extended his free hand.
“I’m Fred, Fred Weasley.”
-
Three weeks later on a Wednesday, you walked inside the same cafe, half expecting that Fred wouldn’t arrive. But you were immediately proven wrong when you saw him, already standing near a table, waiting for you.
He waved at you when he saw you and gestured for you to sit across from him. You walked towards him, sitting down as he pulled out the chair for you. He didn’t know how nice this gesture was but you did.
You small talked about everything. You attempted to make jokes about things to which he responded with throwing his head back laughing like a little kid. “That was the funniest thing someone has ever said to me.” He said.
You were surprised at his response. “It wasn’t even funny, why do you even try to be funny when you’re not?” Your ex-boyfriend would’ve said if it were him instead of Fred.
As your conversation went on, you thought that maybe not all relationships are the way your previous ones were. Maybe some included this. Happiness. Because today, on Wednesday, in this cafe, you watched your feelings begin again.
-
“I’ve never met someone who has the collection of all the chocolate frog cards.” He had said laughing a little when you showed him your card collection. “Well except my brother Ron of course. This is impressive.”
You had smiled and responded, “thanks. I’ve liked chocolate frogs since I first ate them on my way to Hogwarts, back in first year.”
“I kind of figured, it’s cute if you ask me.” He had smiled, making you blush.
He had been telling you about himself and his family. You had been listening intently and laughing every time he told you about the pranks he had played on other students along with his brother George, back when he was in Hogwarts.
You told him about yourself, getting shy occasionally which he couldn’t comprehend why, but you did. He was the sweetest man you had ever talked to.
He eventually took you to meet his family. You were a nervous wreck, to which he had assured you that there was nothing to worry about and his family especially his mother were going to love you.
And he was right. His mother, Molly Weasley who was also a redhead welcomed you as if you were her own. His father, Arthur Weasley was also genuinely interested in knowing about your work. He had asked you many questions related to your work field, making you smile a little as you didn’t really have anyone who was interested in what you did.
His siblings were all friendly towards you. You had immediately gotten along with George, which made Fred smile to himself. You had even given some advices on how they can improve their shop works. Ron showed you his chocolate frog card collection and told you how he still had some missing. You offered yours to him to which he smiled and agreed happily. Ginny treated you as her sister, very much interested in getting to know you more.
You liked the Weasleys, and the fact they accepted you made both you and Fred happy. He had kissed your forehead once you reached your doorstep, after he had insisted on walking you home. That night neither you nor Fred slept, replaying the moment you spent together.
-
Christmas was around the corner and snow had started to gather everywhere. Everyone you could see were busy shopping for holidays.
You were in a shop, buying gifts for Fred and his family. You smiled when you saw the things that Fred had talked about many times and how much he would love it if got it. You made your way to pay, the cashier surprised to see you buying gifts.
“You’re buying gifts for yourself?” he asked. You and the cashier had been friends for many years as you were a frequent customer in his store.
“No, they’re for my- friend and his family.” you had hesitated because you two hadn’t made anything official. Hell was there anything even to make it official? You thought.
The cashier smiled, “explains why you look better than before since last few weeks. Finally got someone right?”
You smiled and nodded back at him and said, “I’m giving love a chance to begin again.”
-
You and Fred were walking back to your house, hand in hand as he small talked about everything. You hadn’t been paying attention, your mind going back to your ex-boyfriend.
You didn’t remember anytime when you and him were like this, peaceful and most of all- happy.
You decided to tell Fred about him so you said, “I wanted to-”
“I wanted to-” he said at same time as you, making both of you laugh.
“You first.” You said.
“I wanted to tell you that my mother wants me to invite you home for the Christmas dinner.” He said sheepishly rubbing his neck.
“I don’t know, Fred. Christmas dinner is for families and-”
He interrupted, “But you’re a part of the family now. Please come, Y/N. I’ll feel better if you did. Plus we’ll get a jumper knitted by my mother herself with our initials on it. It's a family tradition for every Christmas."
"Okay, I'll be there." You said with a smile. Fred grinned widely and kissed your cheek in excitement making you a flustered mess and you thanked Merlin for the cold.
You forgot all about your ex-boyfriend as Fred went on to tell you stories of pranks he played on Ron with George. You had a small smile on your face as you listened to him, and for the first time you thought 'what happened in the past stays in the past'.
-
It was New Year's Eve and you and Fred were decorating your house for the party later tonight. He watched you as you were focused on shaping the cookie dough to bake. Your tongue was grazing your upper lip, ounces of flour around your forehead.
He blushed and looked away when you caught him staring and resumed his work, smiling to himself.
Night came on and the party was in full swing. Fred and George were entertaining the guests with the products from their joke shop. Ginny and Hermione helped you serve the drinks as Ron and Harry small talked, drinks in their hands.
And the time came for which everyone was waiting. The new year countdown. Everyone gathered around near the clock as it ticked. Suddenly, Fred took you by your hand and led you to the balcony.
People started counting backwards as Fred took your hands in his. He looked nervous and your heart couldn't help but pick up its pace.
"10!"
"Y/N, I've known you for almost an year now and I don't think I can deny it any longer."
"7"
"You have always been so kind to others but never to yourself. So I want to be the one to take care of you. You have showed me many times what I'm worth of. You showed me a new way to view life."
"5!"
"Fred, what are you saying?" You asked, quietly.
"3!
"I'm saying that I love you, Y/N. All of you. And I'll never get tired of admitting it. Be my girlfriend, Y/N."
"1!"
You didn't say anything as tears fell down your cheeks. You grabbed him by his collars and attached your lips with his. He immediately wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you closer when you heard everyone screaming.
"Happy New Year!"
Fred and you smiled into the kiss as he sealed the promise of never hurting you by deepening the kiss. Surely you have had some bad relationships but it was all worth it if it had brought you to Fred Weasley, the redhead which made your belief in love begin again.
______________________________________________________________
Ah I loved writing this. Thank you for reading!
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cometcrystal · 2 years
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Results Of Meeting
i told HT (h*ead t*eller, the aforementioned problem) that i respect her job position but i respect people based on how they treat me + the respect they give to me, and she hasn’t been respectful of me at all
she was like “i respect you” and i was thinking thats a damn lie but okay
she said she tries to joke around and cut up with me, i guess to try and make friends with me, but i never respond. and i said “i dont really feel inclined to joke around with people that i’m not friendly with, and i don’t feel like we’re friendly” and she said “i agree.”
when i brought up an example of her behavior to prove my point, she was like “i apologized for that already i thought we were past this”. this is why i didn’t like talking to her before. because she either gets defensive, or says she doesn’t remember doing it.
MN (m*anager) was telling us we’re basically the best two people she’s got, two of the best in the entire regional market, and she was like “you HAVE to get along you HAVE to work your personal stuff out otherwise one of you is gonna end up going to another branch and please don’t make me get someone from (nearby branch)” LMAO
the gist of it was she feels like i don’t respect her authority over the teller line (which i don’t) and that i feel disrespected by her (i am) because we’re both very strong-willed people
after the meeting MN called me into her office
she said she’s got my back
while we were in the meeting, she had to act as mediator so it’s impartial, but she said that i’m in the right and i haven’t done anything wrong
i didn’t tell her some of the things HT did beforehand because i knew the whole situation got on MN’s nerves and i didn’t want it to seem like i was just trying to stir up drama so i just vented about it elsewhere
she was under the impression that me and HT were reconciled and that things were fine. she didn’t know how bad it had gotten until it blew up yesterday and she said she was sorry if she made it seem like i couldn’t come to her about stuff. i was like we’re good dw.
MN told me to write a statement of my perspective of things, and i wrote her up a 3 page document of general things HT does to me and also specific instances (with dates! posting in my work tag on tumblr dot com has its upsides!) and shes sharing the doc with HER m*anager who will probably share it with HR
so it went as well as it could have gone. maybe things will change. maybe not. we’ll see. im okay just knowing MN is a really good b*oss
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pesterloglog · 5 months
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Dave Strider, Rose Lalonde
Act 5, page 3896-3904
TG: i remember waking up here
TG: after getting shot
TT: Yes.
TT: What else?
TG: then the cage bunny came
TG: he gave us the bomb
TG: whered he go anyway
TT: She's around.
TG: the bunnys a she
TT: Her name is Liv Tyler.
TG: dumb
TT: Take it up with John.
TT: What else?
TG: we were talking about who should go
TT: Do you remember what we decided?
TG: no
TG: wait
TG: wasnt i going to go
TG: is that what happened did i go and now im dead
TT: Not quite.
TG: whats not quite
TG: that i didnt go or that im not dead
TT: Do you remember anything else?
TG: no
TT: What about why you went to fight Jack?
TG: sure
TG: i did that
TG: because i wanted to
TG: and because i was supposed to
TT: Are you sure?
TG: yeah i saw my future self fighting him so obviously that had to happen or else id be dead anyway
TG: without even getting the satisfaction of standing up to him
TT: So was your decision a result of desire or obligation?
TG: hard to explain
TG: with all the time shit going on
TG: i dont try to understand your light shit do i
TT: I don't know much about the Light Shit, to be honest.
TT: I may have missed my chance to figure it out.
TG: havent we had this conversation already
TT: Mostly.
TT: I'm doing what I can to jog your memory.
TG: its jogging i guess
TG: its manboobs are jiggling a little
TT: Nice.
TT: So what about Jade?
TG: what
TT: You didn't tell her your expedition with her would result in your death, let alone one she'd inadvertently cause.
TT: Or that she'd be stuck with the job of resuscitating you. Did you?
TG: what am i really supposed to say
TG: hey were gonna hunt frogs til you shoot me through the jack
TG: then i die and youve got to make out with me
TG: that kind of changes how the whole thing goes doesnt it
TT: Not if you're "supposed to," right?
TG: what does that even mean
TT: I guess you're right. No reason to make an effort to empathize if doing so comes at the price of oblivion.
TG: wtf
TT: It must be comforting to have your ASPD tacitly supported by predestination.
TG: aspd
TT: Antisocial personality disorder.
TG: oh no
TG: this conversation just got bumrushed by a mudslide of fucking awful
TT: It wasn't already awful, believing you might be dead?
TG: you dont know anything
TG: about what i was feeling or what happened on lofaf
TG: you were all pavement faced and babbling your throefester speak and flipping off the shit with your own crazy deathwish thing why do you think you know what was going through my head
TG: youre just assuming and throwing around psyche buzzwords like aspd complex disorder
TT: So it's a disorder, a complex, and then a disorder again for good measure?
TG: in your case probably
TT: Sounds like a positively delirious state of existence.
TG: its some delirious biznasty alright
TT: Oh... snap?
TG: yes ima authorize a GOD DAMN you may swipe it at the door to check yourself into the burn ward
TT: Might you loosen the purse strings on an "Oh no he didn't?"
TG: nah those are kept in emergency reserve for yo mama jokes from the 90s
TG: anyway
TG: im telling you if i said anything at all about it she probably doesnt even fire her gun once and all im doing is dragging her into a doomed timeline with me
TT: I guess I'm learning to be impressed by your sense of obligation to inevitable misfortune. It's a strange case of inspiration through futility.
TG: none of this is that big a deal
TG: i just mentioned the basics to her
TG: that id stop time traveling soon
TG: break out of the loops
TG: not have to wonder all the time if i was taking a wrong turn and dooming everybody
TG: i was never that cool with this
TT: With what, exactly?
TG: you know how you turned out to be this incredibly shitty seer of light and basically failed at that in every way imaginable
TT: Hey!
TG: well maybe i never wanted to be a knight of time
TG: maybe id rather just be like
TG: the dave of guy
TG: you know just some dude
TT: These really do not sound like the words of someone ready to face his own death.
TT: The kind you don't wake up from, I mean.
TG: i guess not
TG: guess i failed my quest then
TG: so im like
TG: now what bitches
TG: to nobody in particular i guess
TT: The unseen bitches callously conspiring to expect greatness from you?
TG: yes those exact bitches
TT: If that's how you feel,
TT: Then why did you insist on going on the mission to deliver The Tumor?
TT: Black-and-whitened for giant yin-yang bomb.
TG: oh yeah
TG: i remember that now
TG: then i guess thats what happened
TG: i delivered the bomb and now i must be dead
TT: Are you sure?
TG: is that wrong
TT: Maybe you should try to answer the question. Why did you want to go?
TG: because i made the map so i know how to get there better
TT: But it seems simple enough. A set of bearings to follow.
TT: See? The application pilots the moon. Change course when necessary. Anyone can do it, really.
TT: We talked about this. Debated, if you recall.
TG: ok if you remember it all so clearly why are you grilling me on this shit
TG: will you just tell me whats going on
TT: I'm just seeing if you can remember. And if you're sticking to your story, about why you should be the one to go.
TG: well i am
TG: because i should
TG: or should have
TG: man what the fuck is going on
TG: am i dead or are you dead or what
TT: You're almost there, really. Just try to remember a little more.
TT: What happened after we decided you'd go?
TG: uh
TG: oh yeah
TG: we were trying to figure out a way to detach the moon
TG: so i could pilot it out there
TG: fly it into the sun
TG: but the chain was huge
TG: couldnt think of how to break it
TG: then out of nowhere this sword appears in the thing
TG: so im thinking obviously i have to break the sword somehow
TG: because thats all i fucking do is break swords
TG: but as im thinking of how to do it i put my hand on it
TG: and it just snaps off with this comical shattering noise
TG: like i just fucked up some priceless shit in the louvre
TG: see like that
TG: like i did again just there with my hand
TG: cause of dreambubbles
TG: remember when that happened
TT: Mm hm.
TG: then i took it and sliced the chain
TG: like this
TG: damn
TG: it still cuts like its plowing through a shaft of boneless zombie meat
TT: Careful.
TT: I just managed to quell my appetite after all that burger talk.
TG: whoops
TG: yeah
TG: so then
TG: the moon started drifting away
TG: and i was going to fly up
TG: and take it to the sun
TG: and i said something to you
TG: or i was going to
TG: like say bye or something
TG: but you were just standing there not saying anything
TG: holding that ball of yarn
TG: and then
TG: oh
TG: god thats right
TG: come on
TG: knocking me out so you can steal the suicide mission
TG: god dammit
TG: that is so trite
TT: I really am sorry for that.
TG: its like
TG: heres how bad this is
TG: were are basically bruce willis and ben affleck from johns shitty crappy movie
TG: you made this even more armageddon than it already was
TG: sealing me in the air lock so i can go home to liv tyler and have the most terrible babies with her
TT: If it's any consolation, Liv Tyler came with me on the suicide mission.
TG: the bunny or the actress
TT: Which would make you feel better?
TG: you not knocking me out with a ball of fucking yarn is fucking what
TT: If I could have chosen a method of sparing your life you might have found more awesome, I would.
TT: Is there an "ironic" way to do that?
TG: this probably comes close but that doesnt make it not lame as hell
TT: Does it matter if I took some personal satisfaction seeing you fall unconscious at the gentle glance of a soft cotton globe?
TG: its cool you are so tickled by this i hope it brought you a lot of rad laughs on your way to go fucking explode
TT: ...
TG: so thats it
TG: im actually lying here on derse asleep
TG: and you went out there and blew up the sun
TG: and now youre dead and im dream chilling with your smug ghost
TT: Yes to the first part.
TG: so youre not dead
TT: Not yet.
TG: then youre dreaming
TG: what youre taking a little nap on the moon in the middle of nowhere
TT: Afraid not!
TT: I am wide awake.
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dilxq · 3 years
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How haikyuu boys would react seeing you talk to another boy💛
Ft. Suna, Sakusa, Tanaka, Akaashi
>Suna<
You were at school waiting for the class to finish so you could go to suna and ask him if he wants to eat lunch together. It was like an execuse to see him, but he didn’t mind. He would always look up from his phone, give you a kiss on your cheek and reply with a simple but still heartwarming „sure thing cutie“. But today was a little bit different, when the bell rang you stood up to walk to his class but when you arrived he wasn’t there. That never happens, he would always wait for you in his class because he knew you would come to see him. Before you could think about where he could have been you heard someone call your name so you turned around to see atsumu. „Hey y/n wassup, yer lookin‘ for rin ?“ of course he would already know so you gave him a smile and answered “Yeah, do you know where he is ? He actually knows that i always come to see him.” He told you that the teacher caught him playing on his phone during class, he also added “about time” and the two of you started to laugh. Atsumu told you he would return soon so you should just wait,and right after that he offered to wait with you so you wouldn’t be all alone. You thanked him and so the two of you started to talk about funny things and laughed at nearly everything. About 5 minutes later, you heard the door open so the two of you turned around. Suna stood there with his phone back again in his hand. He looked at you then at atsumu and then back again at you. He sighted and took you by your wrist. “Im hungry. Let’s go eat.” You turned you head back to look at atsumu and see how he formed a “jealous” with his mouth and you could see how he had to hold back from laughing. After suna dragged you out of the classroom he pushed you against the wall and looked at you with narrowed eyes. “Why were you alone with him in a classroom” So you thought about what he probably would think of after seeing his girlfriend sitting on a desk with another boy alone in a classroom. ‘Oop-‚ you said to yourself. He got closer you could almost feel his breath on your face. You gave him a smirk and decided to play a little with him because it was really rare to see him being jealous. So you started to talk „nothing new“. He looked you in the eyes „wtf y/n ?“ you could slightly see the pain light up in his eyes so you regretted it and hugged him „i was looking for you rin and atsumu told me that the teacher took your phone“ you could feel how he sighed in relief “so i waited with him for you” He pushed you back to look at you and you could see how his eyes looked at your lips. You really wanted to kiss him so he came even closer and when you were about to kiss he turned his head and kissed you cheek. He took your hand and started to walk to the cafeteria. Now he was the one smirking. „Lets go eat.Im hungry”.
>Sakusa<
The two of you were in the same class and you sat next to each other but he would never talk to you during class because he wants both of you to focus so you just keep your attention to the teacher. While writing down your notes your pencil cracked and you didn’t have another one so you turned to sakusa. “hey uh.. do you-“ you tried but he didn’t even try to turn his head to you “concentrate y/n” was the only thing you got from him. You didn’t want to bother him more so you turned to your other side, to your classmate. You asked him for a pencil and he gave u one of his. You thanked him and he even told you that you can keep the pencil. Both of you talked for a bit until the teacher told u to stop. So the two of u turned back to your own things and you continued taking your notes. You could feel the gaze from sakusa but you tried to ignore it as good as you can but u couldn’t take it anymore so you turned to him and asked him what his problem was. He didn’t answer until class was over. As you started to pack your things you turned to your boyfriend to see if he was ready to go eat but he was just sitting there, not looking at you. You walked to his desk so you would face him “Baby are you fineeee ?”, he looked up to you and finally said anything “why did u ask him if you have a whole ass boyfriend to ask for a damn pencil”, you looked at him with a serious face and told him that you tried to but he just ignored you. Then he realized that it really was all his fault and also the reason for his jealousy. He looked down and apologized quietly with a annoyed “sorry”. You just couldn’t anymore so you sat on his lap and hugged him. You could feel how his hands reached to yours waist to get you even closer. “so will you answer me next time i talk to u during class?”, you asked him. He looked back up to you and teased you “nah”, he said with a light smirk on his beautiful face. “only if you kiss me here and now”, he added while coming closer to your lips.
>Tanaka<
On your way to your boyfriend tanaka, you bumped into a random guy. You didn’t recognize him but you could tell he was a student at karasuno since he was wearing the same uniform as you. You apologized and tried to continue walking but he took you by the wrist. A little bit uncomfortable you looked down to your wrist and saw him squeezing gently. „ Hey little one, let me invite you to a meal“, he said while coming closer, „ you know, to say properly sorry“, he smirked. You tried to push him off of you, but obviously he was stronger, so instead he grabbed your other wrist and now you were trapped. You told him to let you go and that you have a boyfriend but he didn’t listen so you started to get mad. Is he being serious right now ?! „You should really let go if you don’t want to get injured“. He started laughing. „HAHAHA WHAT ARE U GONNA DO SHORTY ? PUNCH ME ?!? awwwwe“ He got even closer „Hmm? tell me what are you gonna do ?“. You could feel you blood boiling inside you , what if tanaka sees the whole thing.. what would he think.. - no. He would kill him probably. And now you remembered that you two were going to meet up so he should be looking for you by now. As expected you hear him shouting from the other side and the boy infront of you started to cursing „The heck is wrong with this dud-“. The poor boy couldn’t even end his sentence, instead he was panting on the floor and you couldn’t even count to 3. “WHO ARE U AND WHO GAVE YOU THE PERMISSION TO LOOK AT Y/N ?? HUUUUH ?!” You walked over to him and hugged him from the side. He also put his arm around your waist “ Did he do anything ? or was he trying to do anything, cuz if yes..” You told him that he didn’t do anything and that the two of you should go now “ Alright… good for him tho cuz NOT EVEN NOYA COULD STOP ME IF I WOULD BEAT HIM UP NOW”. Damn that must mean something. You started to laugh and drag him away but he kept glaring at that boy. ahhh how much u loved him.
>Akaashi<
School was over and you went outside to wait for you boyfriend Akaashi. You went over to one of the schools vending machines to get something to drink. As you decided what you want someone came from behind you. “Hey y/n, wassup “, one of your friends greeted you. The both of you talked for a while. When you told him that you wanted to buy something to drink, he turned to the vending machine and asked you what you wanted but you kept telling him that its okay and that you have your own money. “No no, i insist”, he smiled. So he went with strawberry milk. As he handed it over to you, you thanked him and opened it. ‘mhmm why is he taking so long ?’, you thought. Slightly confused your friend looks at you “hey y/n are you fine ? are you waiting for anyone by any chance ?”You snapped out of your thoughts as you told him thats its fine and he will come soon. “He ? Who is ‘he’ ?” Suddenly you feel a hand wrapping around your waist. It was Akaashi, ‘finally’, you thought. “I am ‘he’. Nice to meet you y/n’s friend, I am Akaashi, y/n’s boyfriend”, he smiled , “If you excuse us we have a date were going on now, lets keep in touch” Wow. You were impressed of how smooth and cool he got you out of there. But you remembered him mentioning something about a date, so you asked him “Were you joking about the date thing earlier ”.He looked down to you and gave you a small peek on your forehead “No actually not, are you free today ?” And with that the both of you enjoyed the day <3
And i hope u also have a great day, night or whatever !
~💛
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Text
Purple Roses pt. 2 (Miss Venable x reader)
hiya..its 4 am in germany and im really tired :3 but here we go, Mina is damn soft in this fanfic..i hope its okay sksks..here is the first pt.:
https://littlejeaniehugsbumblebees.tumblr.com/post/640902350735818752/purple-roses-ms-venable-x-reader
summary: Mina meets ur parents and u have ur coming out..ouhh and she wants to ask u smt
warnings: nothing its super duper fluff i guess :D
tagglist: @d14n4ol
google translate sksksk
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"Earth to Mina ..", you grumbled and reached out your finger to tap her cheek gently.
"What?"
Your girlfriend looked away from her newspaper with a frown to look down at you, who was lying in her lap.
You had to grin as she stared down at you in confusion as the glasses slid down a few millimeters on the bridge of her nose.
"I asked you something.."
"And what did you ask?"
"So ..", you started after your fingers had moved to her glasses and you had pushed them up again.
"Imagine you had to decide: Either you are the only mortal human among immortal humans or you are the only human who is undying among all mortal humans.. What do you choose?"
"Is that a test?"
"A test for what?"
"For finding out if I'm a psychopath or something like that?" She asked, still staring down at you, frowning.
"No ..." you shook your head. "I just saw it earlier on instagram and was just thinking about it .."
She looked at you thoughtfully for a few seconds.
"I would probably want to be the immortal human among mortals .."
"For real?" You shouted, tilting your head.
"Then you should see all your friends die .."
Mina raised an eyebrow.
"Which friends?"
"Oh wow .." you rolled your eyes.
"So, am I a psychopath now?" She smiled and you could see her white teeth.
"No .." you mumbled as you started to play with her purple blouse.
"I would probably have taken that too .. but just because it would have been weird to be the only person who would have to die at some point .."
Mina let out a low snort.
"Imagine that, a graveyard for one person ..".
"Yes! .." you exclaimed cockily. "I would probably be exhibited in a museum as the only human corpse. And I would get a coffin made of gold and people would come from all over the world just to see me dead .."
"Or some crazy scientist would use your dead body for their projects .."
"Ew .." you made and grimaced. "That wouldn't be that great ..".
"Better to be immortal, then ..", Mina said with a grin before leaning forward to put her newspaper on the table.
"Now I have a question for you, Y / N .."
"Oh yeah?" You looked confused into her brown eyes and she hummed in agreement as her fingers started to comb through your hair.
"Okay, imagine a bitter old woman comes up to you and asked you, if you want to marry her, what would you answer?"
"I would say no, of course ..." you said, tilting your head to one side.
"First of all, I don't find old, bitter women really attractive and, secondly, why should I marry an old, bitter woman when I can just have the most beautiful woman in the world?"
Mina laughed softly before tapping the tip of your nose with her index finger.
"You know what I'm getting at ..".
"What I know is that you could then leave your show-off house and then finally move into my horror apartment ..", you grinned cheekily at her and she just rolled her eyes.
"You know, I've been thinking, Y / N .." she continued, suddenly sounding serious. "We've been a couple for almost a year now and the only person who knows about it is your aunt and some of your friends .."
"Should I start tagging you on my pictures now?" You laughed.
"You're the one who doesn't like all the love stuff in public and that's not supposed to be a reproach .. I-"
"I want to get to know your parents ..", she interrupted you and looked at you carefully.
You met her gaze for a few seconds before you swallowed.
"My parents?" You repeated quietly.
"Your parents."
"Uhm..okay..that's unexpected .." you muttered as you rose from her lap to sit up.
"So my parents are nice people, but you know, that they dont now that I am ... you know-"
"That you are attracted to old, bitter women?"
"Oh shut up Mina .." you hissed and slapped her gently on the upper arm.
"If you say that again, break your stupid stick and throw it in the fireplace ..".
"Ouhh now I'm scared .." Mina teased, grinning, but you just shook your head.
For a moment there was silence between the two of you and Mina was finally the one who interrupted them.
"I don't want to force you to do it and if you say, you don't want to do that, then that's okay .. I don't want to drive a wedge between you and your parents either .." she said and put her hand on yours. Your gaze landed on her hand, ran down her arm to finally meet her face.
"Maybe it's a good idea .." you muttered and she smiled gently.
"At some point I have to tell them anyway .."
-----------------------------
"Hello beautiful woman .." you greet your girlfriend who entered your shop. Like she did every Tuesday night after work ... It was one of your favorite traditions in your relationship.
"How can I help you today?", You smiled brightly at her as she leaned against your counter
"Well Miss Y / L / N, my wonderful girlfriend and I will be with her parents for dinner for the first time tomorrow evening .. You know, her parents don't know that she is a lesbian ...", Mina explained seriously and brought you to grin.
"That sounds interesting .."
"That's it! We're both just pretty nervous and I thought it would be a good idea to bring flowers to her parents ...".
"That's a great idea, Miss Venable .. what were you thinking of?", You tilted your head and wandered your eyes over the woman who was just standing in front of you.
The lavender suit, the way her hair was perfect and the dark lipstick ... she was so fucking beautiful.
Mina cleared her throat briefly when she realized that your attention was no longer on your conversation.
"You know, Miss Y / L / N, I love to watch your talented little fingers remove the thorns from the roses ..", she playfully raised an eyebrow and you couldn't help but laugh.
"How vulgar, Miss Venable .. just make sure that your girlfriend doesn't notice this, otherwise she'll get jealous ..".
You bent down briefly to get the box with the red roses from under the table. You put them on the table between you and Mina and took out the small knife to start removing the thorns.
"How was your day, honey?" You finally asked her after a minute had passed.
"Good," she said curtly.
"Good?", You looked at her grinning. "You sound like a school child who is asked how it was in school ..".
Mina shrugged her shoulders.
"I hate those idiots from my office, but that's nothing new ..".
"Imagine if I would work for you .. maybe you wouldn´t hate it so much anymore ..", you muttered while you still slid your knife over the flower stems.
"I think that wouldn't be a good idea .."
You just nodded and stared intently at the roses in front of you.
"What about the purple roses?", Your friend suddenly asked.
"What do you mean?"
"You had these roses once and never again .."
"That was a special delivery .." you explained and reached under the counter, took out the paper and wrapped the roses in it.
"But we can also make some ourselves ..".
You put the flowers in Mina's arms and looked expectantly into her confused face.
"How is that supposed to work?" She asked.
"You water white roses with purple color .."
"Should we try it sometime ..", she mumbled and you nodded.
"Listen Mina, you wait in the car and I'll finish everything here and then we can go home .."
"Sounds good .." she replied just before she turned around and strutted out of the shop.
----------------------
Her dark eyes stared at Mina in the mirror as she smoothed her blouse with her hands. Miss Venable was usually never nervous, which was because, due to her dominant demeanor, she almost always had the strings in hand when it came to dealing with other people and she didn't care how much she hurt someone with her words. But that was you, her precious little princess and what she wanted least of all was to see you sad because of her. She also knew that she couldn't win over your parents if she intimidated them.
She leaned forward to apply her dark lipstick when you stepped into the bathroom behind her and let out an impressed whistle.
"Is that the blouse you wore on our first date?" You asked, examining the silk fabric on Mina's skin.
"Yes .." she muttered.
Miss Venable's eyes watched you in the mirror while she admired how beautiful you looked in the dress you were wearing.
"My parents should just like you and not want to go to bed with you .." you said with a grin when her eyes found yours in the mirror.
"Ha ha ..", Mina made dry before she screwed the cap of her lipstick back on and turned to you.
"Are you ready?" She asked and you nodded while you smiled wryly.
"You look beautiful .." she muttered and planted a quick kiss on your temple before walking past you to leave the house.
"So to summarize again what my parents know ... or rather
what they think they know .. "you started staring out the window of the moving car.
"Well, actually they don't know anything .. I think they used to think that I had something with my best friend because he was my homecoming date .. And now they think I was single and I told them on telephone you were a good friend... "
"That sounds like it will be a very relaxed evening ..", Mina joked and you couldn't help but grin.
"I'm just afraid it might be a little too much .."
"Too much?" Mina repeated confused.
"Is it a good idea to come out and bring your girlfriend with you? Don't get me wrong, it has nothing to do with you .."
"Well ... you have a point, but let's speculate ..", Mina said when the car stopped at a traffic light.
"How could they react?"
"So .. we have these two iconic situations: The first situation would be this "we always knew it mimimi".
The other situation would be that they will be angry ... and so angry that they don't want to see me anymore .. "you explained and Mina could hear the concern in your voice.
"Something like that is sure not going to happen ..", Mina muttered as she took her right hand from the steering wheel and placed it on your thigh.
"I hope so .."
You were silent for the rest of the journey and that's why Mina decided not to say anything. Would you want her words, you would let her know.
"Here we are ..", Mina mumbled when she finally parked the car in front of your parents' modest house. She looked at you sideways and found that you were staring at the house as if you were about to start crying.
"Hey .." she cooed gently and grabbed your chin to force you to look at her.
"Everything will be fine..".
She examined your worried face and grinned when she saw that there was still a print of her lipstick on your temple.
"What?" You asked confused.
"You have my lipstick on your face ..", Mina mumbled and wiped her thumb over the print to remove it.
"And I think you don't want your parents to find out about your homosexuality that way."
"Not funny ..", you rolled your eyes.
Mina glanced at the car clock.
"We should go in, princess, we are already 5 minutes late .."
"Okay .. here we go ..", you mumbled and suddenly sounded brave as you leaned forward to press your lips against Minas for a moment.
When you both stood in front of your parents' front door and your mother opened the door for you both beaming, Mina immediately noticed the resemblance between you and your mother. This woman seemed just as straightforward as you, and you both had the same laugh. If your mom were really as carefree as you, then the evening wouldn't be complicated, Mina thought as she greeted your mother.
The first half of the evening was totally relaxed, your parents seemed to be really nice people, as far as Mina could tell.
While your mother was just as crazy as you, your father was a bit more introverted, but he had the same sense of humor as you and he was the one who cooked. A fact that somehow gave Mina hope, as it showed that your parents didn't seem to care about the old gender roles (cooking housewife and working businessman).
It was really nice. Mina, who usually had her problems with people, thought she might really like your parents at some point. they didn't ask private questions, didn't let an awkward silence reign, and were totally open-hearted people.
And yet she felt how nervous you were while you were sitting next to her at the dining table and trying to choke the food down even though you were probably extremely sick. Usually you played with your fingers when you were nervous or excited, but since your hands were holding the cutlery, it was your leg that was pushing off the floor all the time. And it was Mina who then, invisible to your parents, put her hand on your knee to calm you down.
It was around 9 o'clock when the four of you ran out of conversation and it was you who finally broke the silence.
"Well uhm, I actually came to tell you something .." you said and your voice sounded thick. Immediately all pairs of eyes were focused on you and Mina tensed her hand on your thigh to show you that she was there.
"Oh yeah?" Your mom asked confused before you nodded.
"Well, you always wanted me to be in a relationship with someone .." you continued and stared lost at the half-empty wine glass in front of you.
"And surprise..I'm in a relationship .."
"Oh really?", Mina could see your mother's eyes starting to glow and she wondered if the whole thing was really a good idea.
"Yes ..".
"Who is he?" Asked your father.
"Well uhm she's sitting right next to me ..".
Mina closed her eyes for a moment when she felt the confused looks of your parents on her. For a few seconds no one said anything and she felt you start to slide back and forth on your chair.
"Oh ..", Your mom finally pounded when she understood what you were talking about.
Mina opened her eyes again and stared into the flame of the candle that was on the table.
"You and Wilhemina ..?", Your mom looked confused between Mina and you.
"We've been together for almost a year .." you added and Mina heard your voice break at the end.
"What does being together mean?" Your mom asked sharply.
"She is my girlfriend."
"Girlfriend like best friend?"
"No, girlfriend like i love her ..", you muttered and looked carefully at Mina who smiled gently at you while she rubbed your thigh.
"Does that mean that you .....?", Your mother stared at you with her eyes wide open.
"I'm a lesbian, yes .." you said firmly and returned her gaze.
"Damn it .." your mom muttered and fell back into her chair.
Finally your father cleared his throat, too, who hadn't moved an inch before.
"How long have you known?" He asked, leaning forward.
"Since Highschool i guess ..".
"Since high school? Are you kidding me?" Your mom shouted angrily and Mina could feel you flinch under her hand.
"Why are you telling us this now?"
"Maybe because your most asked question to me was whether I have a boyfriend or when I will finally get one ..?" You croaked.
"Because we thought you were straight .." your mom yelled back. "If we had known that you were into women, we would never have asked such a thing .."
"I thought you'd be disappointed or something."
"Disappointed? Oh damn Y / N ..", your mother shook her head in disbelief and looked at you sadly.
"Can you say something too, Dad?" You asked after two minutes of more silence as you looked away from your mother to look at your father, who was staring at you thoughtfully.
"I uh ... so when you have a daughter, as a father, you imagine all the things your child has in store for you ..." your dad began.
"That includes the person your daughter wants to grow old with at some point and I just imagined that this person was a man and now it's a woman .. And now I need a few seconds to turn this man into one woman .. if you understand.."
"Okay ..." you replied quietly.
"You know, at the same time I wonder if I have said anything homophobic in all the years of your childhood that could have scared you .." he continued and you nodded slowly.
"Who knows it?" Your mother suddenly asked.
"Uhm .. some friends and aunt Phoebe .."
"Aunt Phoebe?" Your mother frowned when you mentioned your aunt.
You shrugged your shoulders.
"She noticed that Mina only comes to the flower shop when I'm there and then wanted to know why .."
"My sister knows that my daughter is a lesbian and I don't know?" Your mother called, sounding reproachful.
"I was afraid that you would be angry or something .." you defended yourself.
"Y / N you're still our damn daughter .." your mother mumbled and swore again.
"No Y / N, you are our daughter .." your dad interfered.
"There is no place for a  'still' because you are simply our daughter and your sexuality could never change that .. Who you love is your business and you do not need our permission .."
You stared at him and felt tears welling up in your eyes.
"You have no idea how happy I am to hear that .." you muttered before getting up and walking over to your dad to give him a hug.
"Thank you so much .." you whispered against the fabric of his shirt.
Suddenly you felt your mom, who had also got up, put a hand on your shoulder and pulled you from your dad's arms into hers.
And while you all played happy family, Mina was still sitting a little lost at the dining table and watching the situation in front of her. It all happened faster than expected.
In her  eyes, your father had taken it a little better than your mom, who seemed a little disappointed because you had only told them now.
"I should go to the bathroom to fix my make-up ..." you mumbled and smiled sheepishly as you withdrew from your mom's arms.
Your mother just nodded before you turned around to jump out of the room, leaving Mina alone with your parents.
"So you're a lesbian too .." said your mother, mumbling as your parents sat down again.
"I am.", Mina replied curtly and pressed her lips together.
"And is that serious between you?"
"It is."
"This is probably the moment when I should threaten to kill you if you break her heart .." joked your father.
"I'll propose to her," Mina said firmly.
"So it's really serious ..", your mother's eyes widened at Mina's words.
"It is .." repeated she.
"Well, we would be happy if you would invite us to your wedding..", your dad interjected and Mina decided at that moment that she liked your parents.
A few seconds later you were standing in the doorway and had your radiant smile back on.
"I think we should go now, Mina .." you said and Mina hummed in agreement.
"That's a good idea.."
As soon as you were outside, after hugging your parents for a long time, you jumped into the arms of your girlfriend to kiss every inch of her face.
"Jesus Y / N ..", Mina muttered, who stumbled a few steps back from your sudden attack.
"I'm such an idiot ..", you laughed. "I've been worrying for free all these years and now they have reacted so well to it ... I should have done that much earlier .."
Mina smiled as she pressed a quick kiss on your forehead.
"I'm proud of you, princess .."
"So and now ..", you shouted cockily and pulled her hand to your car.
"Now I want to get to know your mother .."
"No way..You don’t want to meet that witch ..".
----------------------
"Come on, Y / N .. you promised me .." Mina pleaded.
"But it's really cold up there and besides, I'm tired .." you replied.
It was New Year's Eve and the two of you had decided to spend the evening at your apartment and then climb onto the roof around midnight to watch the fireworks. To your surprise, it was Mina who suggested going to you, although she usually doesn't like visiting your "horror apartment".
"If you put on your winter jacket you won't be cold and besides, I'm there ..", Mina tried further.
"You know, I think the idea of ​​you as a human heater is really cute, but we could just drive to you ..".
"That wouldn't be the same."
You sighed.
"Okay ..", you mumbled and had your friend give you your coat.
Surprisingly, you found out that you were the only ones on the roof. At least you couldn't see any of your neighbors when you went over the roof to your self-made bed.
It was currently 11:37 pm and until the fireworks started at midnight you had enough time to watch the beautiful starry sky, as you always did when you were with her.
Your head was on her shoulder as always while she had an arm around you as always and was playing with your hair.
"I actually wanted to talk to you .." you mumbled after a few minutes.
"Is everything okay?", Mina asked and looked down at you worriedly.
You nodded quickly.
"Yeah .. it's just uhm, you know I love the flower shop, but I don't think that's what I want to do for the rest of my life ..".
"No?"
"No ..", you said. "That's why I'll catch up on my school leaving certificate and then probably study something ..".
"Thats great, princess .." Mina smiled gently at you.
"And what do you want to study?"
"History .. I guess and then I'd like to work as a professor .. At schools or colleges .." you mumbled.
"Professor sounds hot," said Mina and you had to laugh.
"The good thing is that when I study I can still live with you."
"Yes?"
"Yep .." you nodded. "We have a college in town, in case you forgot .. and if they take me, I don't have to move to campus ..".
"That would be great ..", Mina muttered and glanced at her watch.
11:52
"In 10 minutes it will be ready ..".
"Ouhh, we should stand by the railing .." you said before you jumped up and stretched your arm to help Mina up.
"Well ..", you began as you clung to the railing of the roof and leaned forward a little so that Mina was afraid you would fall off the roof at any moment.
"Josh lives back there ..", you explained and pointed with an outstretched finger at another tower block. "He is the brother of a friend of mine. He makes a lot of fireworks with his friends every year. Then my neighbors, the Andrews, who are not there today for whatever reason, always let a lot of fireworks rise from our roof, even though it is actually is forbidden .. And then there are all the people on the street who bring their fireworks .. ".
You stared at a group of people who were standing on the corner of the street in front of the bakery and were already setting off fireworks
"It occurred to me, I think Josh broke his leg and can't even go on the roof .." you mumbled with a frown and Mina hummed in agreement, not even listening to you.
As your eyes wandered over the city, hers glued to you and looked at you lovingly. She looked at her watch one more time (11:55) and took a short breath before reaching into the pocket of her coat to feel the velvet-covered can with her fingers.
You didn't even notice it when you were still happy watching other people's fireworks
"Okay, Y / N .. I'm not good at this, but I'll try my best, okay?" Mina said suddenly and you looked at her confused.
"What do you mean?"
"We've been together for almost a year and I have no regrets, except for one small thing .."
"Oh yeah?" You frowned as she continued.
"About a year ago you asked me in the evening, if I believed in love at first sight and I told you, that I generally don't believe in love and that was actually a lie. So it was true somewhere, I didn't believe in love until the moment I walked into your little flower shop and saw you cut your finger because of your lack of concentration.
You know how much I hate people, but with you it's different..I can't hate you and I never could hate you and I hope that you understand that between all the 'hate' I try to explain to you how much I love you .. because I do and I have no idea what I would do without you, I would probably just be a bitter old woman .. ", she finished and grinned when she saw you roll your eyes.
"I hope you're not mad at me, because I can't get down on my knees because of my handicap .." she mumbled and took out the small velvet box to hold it towards you.
"But do you want to marry me?"
You stared at her in shock.
"Shit, that wasn't a joke?"
"Does that mean no?", Mina frowned.
"God no! I'm just- Oh damn, Mina, of course I want to marry you ..", you grabbed her face between your hands and pulled her close to kiss her tightly.
"This is going to be great .." your eyes lit up as you pulled back.
"I already have so many ideas for the wedding, I'll take your name and all that .. Y / N Venable sounds amazing, change my mind.. and then I'll move in to your house and then I can catch up with school and maybe one day we'll adopt a lot of children from poor countries..".
"Slowly, Y / N ..", Mina laughed and took your hand to slide the ring onto your finger.
"We still have enough time to plan, let's celebrate New Year's Eve now, please..”
"God, it is beautiful .." you muttered, staring at the silver ring on your finger. Mina smiled as she leaned over to press her lips against your forehead.
"Happy new year, princess .."
"Happy new year, my dear future-wife.."
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heyheydidjaknow · 3 years
Text
I would’ve posted this earlier but, alas, I passed out early. This is a longer one, but tumblr got its act together so I can post it all in one part. You guys know where the other chapters are, and if you don’t, they’re at the end of the chapter. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go eat straight Nutella.
Chapter 10
“I’m thinking about getting some gloves.”
He looks over at you as he laces up his skates. “Yeah?”
“Yeah,” you nod, smiling slightly to yourself as you look your hands over, trying to imagine what they would look like. “Like, badass, fingerless gloves.”
He smiles. “Dude, those would look metal as fuck.”
“Totally, right?” Your smile widens. “With studs and shit.”
He gets to his feet, hopping onto the ice. “Hell yeah.” He drops a puck to assault as you go back to your backed-up coursework the best you can—your handwriting has gone to hell, but you are working with what you have.
You flinch at the crack of his stick, the cross of the T ending up underneath the letter somehow. A cheer from Casey tells you the rubber cylinder’s fate.
‘I swear I learned this.' You squint at the basic algebra, the pencil, crudely held in your fist, hovering over the packet. ‘Why can’t I do this?’
“How’s your pile coming along?” Another crack.
“It’s comin’.” You run your fingers through your hair. “Just… trynna remember how to do ne—… subtraction.” ‘Not debate. Negating is debate.’
He laughs. Another crack. “Man, that thing really fucked you over, huh?”
“Thoroughly.” You decide against continuing to torture yourself, having been at it for the past five hours—most of it in the library before Casey invited you to watch him practice some more— and set the large stack of homework back in your bag. “Are you actually making the shots?”
“Casey Jones doesn’t miss shots.” Another crack.
“Pardon me, oh almighty king of the ice.” You stand on your good leg, grabbing the side of the wall to watch as he went back to collect his pucks.
You two have managed to bond over a mutual respect/love of heavy metal and hockey and, seeing as you are staying out of the Hamatos’ hair for a while—not upon request, but out of courtesy—you have managed to spend a lot more time with him than you may have otherwise. Your school has not assigned Biology any big projects yet, so, until you are assigned it, you do not have anything other than your health to stress about.
“Pardon accepted.” You watch his form as he performs another slap shot.
“You…” you trail off, trying to remember what you were going to say.
“What?”
You shrug. “Dunno.” You lean your head on your arms. “I’ll remember eventually.”
He drops the second puck. “Got any plans after this?”
You sigh. “Nope. Probably gonna head home and try not to cut my fingers making dinner again.”
He takes another shot. “Then let’s go out after this. You and me.”
You smile. “What, don’t have any plans either?”
“Nah.” He drops the third. “Dad doesn’t care if I’m home late anyway.”
“True, true.” You have decided against prying into his home life; it is not your place and does not concern you in the slightest. “Where do you wanna go?”
“Wanna catch a movie? Heard there was this new pizza place just a couple blocks down if you wanna try to sneak it in.”
You snicker. “In the box and all?”
“Yes.” He grins mischievously and hits this one off the walls. Some way, somehow, it still makes it into the goal. “I bet your sweatshirt is big enough to stick the box under.”
You stick your tongue out at him. “Not in the mood for burns on top of scars, Jones,” you reprimand him teasingly. “That just ain't it.”
“Then you can wear mine under that one and—”
“Your sweat-soaked hoodie you’ve been practicing in all day?” You cringe at the thought. “Over my dead body.”
“I mean…” he licks his teeth, smile widening, “it’s not exactly like you’re in the best—”
You laugh. “So not cool!”
He puts his hands up in defense, gliding over. “I mean, am I wrong, though?”
“That is completely besides the point, you ass.” You balance on your foot, crossing your arms. “Damn. Making fun of the girl with the broken leg.”
He leans against the wall. “Man, you were dying before the crash.”
You roll your eyes. “Alright, whatever, Jones.” You lean against your hand. “How’s Johanna,” you sing.
He presses his hand against your face, pushing you away. “Annie is doing fine.”
You grin, steadying yourself on the wall. “Do you feel her, Johanna?”
“I’m gonna tell her you call her that if you don’t quit it.”
“Do you think that walls can hide her? Even when you’re at her window?”
He pushed his arm all the way out. You hop back.
“Her name isn’t even Johanna.”
“But she is Johanna,” you whine in protest, not bothering to hide your mirth. “She has the hair, the voice, the disposition. She’s an ingénue and you know it.” You have been teasing him about this for a while now: the girl in question—Annabelle Halshaw, a year below you two—had caught his eye when he had heard through the grapevine that she was the lead singer in some indie band. When he had shown you a picture and told you the story, you insisted on calling her Johanna for her golden hair and soft, sweet singing voice he had proudly had you listen to.
“She’s not.”
You roll your eyes, sitting back down as you grab your bag. “Lie to yourself all you want,” you goad, “but deep down, you know in your heart that the truth,” you put a finger up, “is apparent.”
He hops off the ice, sitting next to you as he unlaces his skates. “Whatever.” He smirks. “How’s The Don?”
You avert your gaze. “I haven’t seen ‘im.”
“Boo.” He tied the laces together. “Some girlfriend you are,” he ribs.
You go red. “Not my boyfriend. Not even friends with benefits.”
“Yeah, sure.” He sets the skates into his bag. “That’s why you already know his family.”
“That—”
“And why you’ve had him over to your place.”
“If you don’t cool your tits, I’m telling Lucy you’re crushing on her friend.”
“Don’t you dare!”
“What,” you simper, “think I won’t?”
He grabs his bag. “If you do, I’ll show her that video.”
You laugh, following him out of the rink. “You’re the worst.” You note how strange it is that he spent so little time on the ice as you two walk out, but you do not say anything about it.
“Hey, you’re the one throwing threats around.”
“Yeah,” you argue, “but my threat is clearly better.”
He rolls his eyes, pushing you again.
You two keep chatting on the way to the theatre about anything and everything, from new bands to upcoming games to the newest blockbuster horror movies. You are not personally on the hockey team, but, as his friend, it is your duty to care. Besides, you figure, it gives you something to look forward to.
The movie is fine. You convince him against sneaking an entire pizza in, you split a bucket of popcorn, and you give him shit for getting freaked out by the disembowelment scene. It is payback for him teasing you about crying during the last movie you two went to a couple of days ago.
You two stand at the streetlight.
“Dude, it’s like eight,” he groans. “It’s not even late.”
“True,” you agree. “Counterpoint: I still have another week’s worth of work to do by Friday on top of the homework I’ll have to do anyway, so unless you wanna help—”
“Forget I asked.” He pulls his hood up against the autumn wind. “Need me to walk you back?”
“Nah.” You shrug. “If someone mugs me, they’ll give me an excuse to not do my homework.”
“Murdered?
“I’m already halfway there.”
He grins. “See ya tomorrow, Y/N.”
“See ya, Jones.” You wave as he runs off.
The walk home is quiet and considerably easier than it was a couple of weeks ago. Seeing as you now get queasy whenever you get into a car, you have been limited to taking the subway and walking, which, among other things, has contributed positively to your physical strength. You know that you should probably at least try to take the bus or a cab around town to build your tolerance up, but the last time you tried, you had almost tripped and fallen from how shaky your legs were getting out. Oddly enough, you note as you go through the door, you do not have a considerably larger fear of heights than you did before, or of fire, but cars were tripping you up, even though you were the one that crashed it. You feel thankful that, at least, you do not think your fear is crippling. At least, you reason, you can still get into the car.
You lock the door behind you, debating whether you feel like adding to the collection of cuts you now possess— they are self-inflicted, but not intentionally so; you stubbornly refuse to acknowledge the fact that you physically cannot use your hands to cut things. You decide against it tonight, tossing your bag on the bed as you sprawl across it, admittedly exhausted. You allow yourself a couple of seconds with your eyes closed before you pull yourself up with a groan and get back to work.
A part of you wishes that you had the physical energy to stay out longer. You are always trying to find excuses not to sleep, and although the mountain of homework and readjusting your timelines for things you missed is certainly one way to keep yourself preoccupied, it is not exactly what you would consider fun. Then again, reliving your greatest traumas while you sleep is not exactly fun either.
You catch yourself peeling at the newly applied bandages on your fingers, fingernails catching under the crudely applied adhesives. Applying bandages properly requires more dexterity and patience than you currently possess, and you are hardly going to ask someone else for help with something as stupid as that. You have lasted this long without needing too much help. People can live by themselves. You will live, probably. Well? Not your concern.
‘I should eat something.’ Your eyes strain to focus on the piece of paper in front of you, your mind wandering aimlessly as you try to impress the actual importance of finishing this upon yourself, but you find that is an insurmountable feat.
You drop your bag off the side of the bed, reaching down and pulling your shoe off, leaning back into your pillows, the weight of the day practically immobilizing you. Fumbling hands switch the lamp off, bathing your room in momentary, blissful darkness before the gravity of your decision sets in.
“Alright, me,” you breathe to yourself. “What’s it gonna be today? My folks? Bradford? What’s his face? Hell,” you chuckle, “why not all three? I’m sadistic enough, I’m sure.”
You close your eyes. “Give me your worse,” you challenge as you slip into unconsciousness.
--
Two weeks.
He had kept his distance for about two weeks. It was not as if he did not care or was not morbidly curious what the crash had done to you—his glances through the curtains did not tell him much-- but, after some debate, he had figured you needed time to recuperate before you would want his company. Two weeks, he figured, would be enough time for you to get back on your feet or, at least, for you to start wanting company.
His excuse to see you had come in the form of his brother’s newfound prideful boasting. Feigning insult was as good an excuse as any to go see you; after all, he just so happened to be in the neighborhood anyway, and it was normal to pop in to see someone if you were already just a couple blocks down, right? Sneaking away was easy enough—they would not mind his absence—and he, after much prep work, knew exactly how and why he was going to say the things he would to get in your good favor. The plan, he knows, would have gone swimmingly.
His plans seem asinine when he hears you crying.
His brothers do not cry much. He does not, either; it was a habit that they had all thoroughly bullied themselves out of when they were much younger and, if they still did, he knew nothing of it. His master did not encourage this, per se, but talked, then, frequently about the importance of maintaining a more stoic disposition and not allowing emotions to cripple you in battle. Practically, Donatello was satisfied with that explanation, having not properly cried for more than a year now. To hear the sound again, especially coming from you, was novel.
Novel, too, is how you are crying. The sound is less of actual sobbing and more of you being strangled, quiet gasps for air escaping your lips as you shake on the bed, curled in on yourself and clutching at your chest as if whatever pain you are experiencing is centered and can be relieved by something between your collarbones. His eyes, for the first time, trace the lines on your skin, your sleeves riding up your arms to reveal them to him, tears racing down and along the gash in your face. Everything about the scene, from the soft gasping of panic to your position to the heavy scarring, is completely foreign to him, rivaled only by one or two particularly hard nights when he and his brother were much younger.
He slides in through the window, leaning onto the bed. His fingers flick your lamp back on as he grabs your shivering shoulder tightly, shaking you awake as he mumbles words of encouragement. He is not sure if his help will be appreciated, if snapping you out of it was even what he is supposed to do in this situation, but now is not the time to think of that. You are in pain. He can offer you this kindness. “Wake up,” he pleads, not thinking of how this would look until your eyes snap open to look at him.
Immediately, the reality of the situation sets in, and he scrambles off the bed. ‘Why did I think that would be a good idea?’ Panic. ‘You just walked into her room like a fucking creep. See, now she’s going to—’
“Sorry.”
He blinks, looking up at you from his place on the floor. “Huh?”
You clear your throat, wiping the tears from your eye with your sleeve quickly as you bring your knees to your chest, voice hoarse. “Sorry,” you repeat. “That you… I’m not sure what I’m apologizing for, but I know I should be apologizing.”
He is completely dumbfounded.
Your eyes glance to the open window. “I should probably start closing and locking my window, right?” You rub the back of your neck, voice clearing the longer you talk. “It didn’t occur to me since I’m so high up, but if you guys can get in, The Foot can too, right?”
‘Why is she apologizing?’
You push the hair out of your face. ‘You need something, right? I—uh—need to stop saying ‘right’ so much.” You shake your head to clear it. “’ Sup?”
He hears himself mumble some bullshit out about being in the neighborhood.
You sigh. “Sorry.” You close your eyes. “I’m usually up later; I’ve been so tired lately.”
‘Is she serious right now?’ He is completely lost. ‘She was just crying her eyes out in her sleep and now she’s apologizing? Did I miss something?’ You are smiling now, eyes still bloodshot, as if the whole thing is a figment of his imagination, still shivering where you sit.
He rises to his feet, kneeling in front of you on the bed. “What was it about?”
You blink, seemingly confused. “Huh?”
“Your nightmare,” he clarifies. “You were crying. What was it about?”
You avert eye contact. “Nothing too crazy,” you shrug. “Just about the crash. Nothing too exciting.” If possible, he thinks the bags under your eyes are worse than the last time you saw him.
He takes your hands loosely, turning them palms up to look, for the first time, at the patchwork quilt that is now your skin. “What happened in it?” He runs his thumb along the lines, keeping his voice low; he remembers how that used to help when Mikey used to have fits when they were younger. Leonardo and Raphael were never good at that; they took better to being more violently snapped out of their moods, but, then again, they never had this kind of breakdown; theirs were always more driven by loathing, self or otherwise.
You pause, still not looking him in the face as your muscles relax. He remembers, vividly, how he had done something similar when you two had first met, how much better, health-wise, you looked. ‘How long has it been since then? Three months? A little less?’
You take a deep breath. “Just… family shit,” you mumble, eyelids drooping as you trace his frame loosely. “Fire.”
Your gaze is piercing as you finally look at him properly. He feels something catch in his throat as you bow your head.
“It’s my fault, you know.” Your voice is so soft, barely a whisper. “That they’re dead, I mean.”
The air is a suffocating blanket that smothers you both.
“I never told you, did I?” Your focus does not shift as it might have a bit ago. It is locked solely and intensely on him, taking in every detail of his expression. “How I died? How they died? Why I died?”
Hesitantly, he shakes his head. He thinks it best to just be quiet and let you talk. He does not think he has ever heard anyone speak in quite the same tones, ever looked at him quite the same way you are.
You take another breath. “I wanted to try my hand at baking.” You force your eyes to stay focused on his. “I was—still am—not good about sleep. I always slept bad, and never at the right times. I used to take pills for it, to try to get myself back on track.”
He sees where this is going.
“I thought I could still stay up as late as I was used to.” You glance to the side, stealing yourself a second before focusing back on the boy in front of you. “I sat down in my room, turned on a movie. I set a timer. I fell asleep.” You swallow, hands shaking in his. “I can’t smell well, either. I must not have smelled the burning.” Your lips curl in a bitter smile. “Sure as fuck felt it, though, when I woke up.”
He lets you finish.
You try to blink the tears out of your eyes. “They were asleep,” Your voice rises ever so slightly. “I fell asleep at two something. I woke up when they started yelling.” You purse your lips, face reddening in shame as your nostrils flair. “They were trying to get someone out of bed when the roof caved in above them. My door got blocked.”
You feel yourself smile.
“So,” you strain not to cry, “that, Donatello, is why I’m here and why I’m dead, and why I really do deserve to burn again.” You laugh. “Hell, my body count is rivaling some serial killers, so that’s… that’s certainly something.”
He lets go of your hands, face blank.
You lean forward, placing your hands on your knees. “I don’t blame you,” You wipe a wayward tear out of your eyes, trying to swallow the frog in your throat. “Fuck, man, I’d think less of me, too, if it were me.” You nod towards the window. “I get it if you want to leave, but I thought you might want to know why—”
He stops you mid-sentence, wrapping his arms around you and pulling you to him.
Your arms lay slack at your sides as you try to process what is happening.
He does not say a word.
You break.
You burry your face into him, tears welling in your eyes as you let out a strangled sob. You hold onto him tightly as you struggle to breathe, body shaking as you wrap your own arms around him the best you can. The sound roars in your ears like thunder, the deafening quiet of the apartment punctuated only by your own cries. He gently holds you there, resting his head on top of yours. Each sound you make sounds as though you are physically being choked by your guilt, and his chest feels as though it is being crushed by an invisible hand as he listens to your pain.
Neither of you knows how long you stay like that.
He considers telling you a story from a long time ago, about some training he and his brothers had back then, but thought better of it; he does not want to upset you any more than you already are, and being in good company with someone like him may not be exactly what you need right now. Granted, he does not know what you do need, but he knows listening to him talk about bashing brains would not help your sensibilities any.
Instead, he stays quiet.
You pull away after a while, wiping your face off again as you mumble out an apology.
“Don’t apologize.” He clears his throat. “It’s good to cry; it releases endorphins.”
You smile at that. “Well,” you giggle tearfully, “if it releases endorphins.”
He smiles back, face flushing. You look good, he thinks, even with your face all red. He knows that, scientifically, there is probably a reason, but he cannot think of it right now.
He stands up. “I’ll get—”
You grab his hand tightly.
He looks back at you.
“Can I ask a favor?”
He blinks. “Of course,” he agrees easily. “Anything.”
You glance off. “Promise not to take it weird?”
He feels his heart rate increase. “Y-yeah,” he nods.
He feels you pull him gently back on the bed. “Can you stay here tonight?”
His eyes widen as they flicker between the mattress and you. “What,” he clarifies breathlessly, “like sleep with you?”
You nod.
“In the same bed?”
You hesitate, nod again.
He clears his throat, face heating again. “Like, actually?”
“If it wasn’t actually, I wouldn’t ask, would I?” You grip his hand tightly. “I just really don’t want to be alone tonight.”
‘Oh.’ He mentally kicks himself. ‘She’s scared. Don’t make her uncomfortable.’
“It’s alright if you don’t—”
He is extremely quick to reassure you that he is more than happy—‘Bad choice of wording.’—to stay tonight until you fall asleep, but that he would not stay the whole night as to not worry his brothers.
You nod in agreement. “That’s fine.” You rub the back of your neck. “Not sure I would be good company when I wake up, anyway; I still have class.”
“Oh, right.” He nods in understanding, pushing himself further onto the bed. “Which side…?”
You shrug. “Which way do you face?”
“I usually lie on my stomach.”
“Then it doesn’t matter.” You slide your sweatshirt over your head after a bit of squirming around, tossing it onto the couch.
His face is now scarlet. “Okay then,” he mumbles, laying down on the side away from the window. ‘Is she going to—no, stop that.’
You look over at him, face down on the mattress. You can almost feel the heat coming off him. “Are you alright there, buddy?”
He nods.
You shrug, laying down under the blanket and curling into him, facing the window. “Mind getting the light?”
He reaches over, clicking it off.
You sigh in content, turning to face him, teetering on the edge of the mattress. “I’m not venomous,” you inform him teasingly. “I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again: of the two of us, you should not be the one who’s a nervous wreck.”
“You dunno that.” His voice is muffled by the bed.
“You’re the strong one,” you argue.
“So?” He turns his head to look at you. “I’m the guy laying in the—I’m just gonna stop that sentence.”
“It’s only bad if it isn’t consensual.” You smile reassuringly. “I invited you to lay with me, right? So, unless I make you uneasy, then we’re all good.”
He breaks eye contact. “So,” he clarifies, “you don’t mind if I move closer to you?”
You shake your head.
He hesitantly slides himself further onto the bed. “Can I move closer than this?”
“You’ve already seen me bawl my eyes out. You’re doing me a service. Move as close or as far as you want.”
He moves to press his side against you. “Is this fine?”
You nod. “Look, how about this?” You rest your arm under your head. “If you do something I’m uncomfortable with, the safe word is pina colada.”
‘We already have a safe word?’ He was not sure if he is on cloud nine or just terrified of you.
You are very confused why he looks so warm. “Do you need me to turn the AC on?”
He shakes his head. “I’m good,” he assures you tightly. Slowly, he reached an arm out and over your waist, pulling you closer. You do not seem to resist in any way, wrapping your good leg around one of his to pull him closer.
‘Conscious touching.’ He glances down at you, trying to act cool. ‘Conscious, intentional touching. She smells so nice and she feels—okay, this is not going to work if you keep being a perv.’
“Thanks,” you mumble, humming softly. “I appreciate this more than you know.”
Cloud nine. Definitely on cloud nine.
“Every time.”
You giggle.
He blinks. “What?”
“Every time,” you note, already nodding off. “Like in that book.”
‘Which one?’ “They wrote it down for a reason, right?” The longer he spends like this, the smoother he feels.
“Totally.” You smile, closing your eyes. “Just know that this goes both ways, alright? If you ever need help like this, you know who to call.”
This is new. ‘Help like this? What, like crying?’ His eyebrows furrow as he tries to understand what you mean. ‘Or he means if I ever need company in my—what did I just say?’
You pick up on his confusion. “Emotional help, I mean.” Your fingers trace the indentations in his shell absentmindedly. “I mean, I know sometimes I didn’t want to go to my family about stuff. I dunno if you have that…” you trail off, realizing that you might be unintentionally bashing his brothers. You sincerely do not want to blow this.
“I mean,” he says after a bit, “I think I get what you’re talking about.” He sighs. “You mean stuff that they’d make fun of me for, right?”
You nod.
He feels his heart melt a little. “I’ll have to take you up on that.”
You forgot how safe he makes you feel. “Goodnight, Donnie,” you mumble sleepily.
“Goodnight, Y/N.”
You pass out not long after that. If he has to estimate a general amount of time, he will clock it in at about five minutes. He does not move, however, until about thirty minutes before sunrise, too busy listening to the sound of your breathing and memorizing how exactly your body feels next to his. As he slips out of the window, early morning air waking him back up completely, he wonders if, someday, he could stay to see you wake up next to him. Not out of necessity, but just because you both wanted to stay like that for a while more.
‘I hope so. It’s a nice dream to have, anyhow.’
Table of Contents
Chapter 9
Chapter 11
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warmau · 4 years
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ateez x coworker!au | sf9 ver    *this post was commissioned (someone asked for some cute ateez) <3
hongjoong
diligent and always on time, he puts way too much effort into any project on his plate 
if there’s any word to describe him its workaholic, but hongjoong insists that he’s just being a good employee - nothing more
but it’s like,,,,,,,,,,,you’re doing the regional managers job and you are literally not,,,,,,,the regional manager
he’s some how the assistant to the regional manager and like. no one understands how because like hongjoong most definitely does the brunt of the work 
but during annual reviews he’s always downplaying it and that evil good for nothing regional manager takes the credit
wooyoung and san on a regular basis: what if the regional managers tires get slashed accidentally or what if we hide all of those ugly ties he wears or what if we hack into the company's assets and make it look like hes laundering money-
hongjoong: dont do that
wooyoung and san winking: yeah, sure, “don’t do that”
hongjoong: no like seriously dont do that 
his little office space is really cutely decorated though and hes the best gift giver at office parties because he always gives something handmade and unique
you have a bracelet that you got last christmas from him when you guys got paired for the exchange, and it’s really so cute and colorful you always wear it
and the office guys tease hongjoong about it like, “hey - are you guys a couple? c’mon tell us the truth - you have a matching bracelet for yourself!”  (hongjoong feverishly refuses this but the tips of his ears always get red)
one time mingi, with all the good naturedness of his heart commented that you must find the deep, dark exhaustion eyebags under hongjoong eyes cute - you know, like a racoons! 
and you were like o-oh well- y-y-es?!?!?! and hongjoong had proceeded to drag the poor intern out of the break room by his ear
it’s like the shy office romance that everyone is cheering for that doesnt really happen
until one evening as hongjoong is getting ready to finally leave for the day he’s astonished to see you
frantically searching on your hands and knees for something in the dim office lights
“did you lose your keys?”
he asks and you’re so startled you hit your head on the desk you’re under as you come up - you put your hands up embarrassingly and mumble that no,,,,,you lost that bracelet he gave you,,,,
he lets out a little “oh!” and waves his hand in the air as if its nothing, he tells you not to worry - it was just a little gift-
“no, it’s important to me,,,,,,,” 
your voice is a slight whisper and hongjoong barely catches
“w-why is it so important to you?”
“because you made it.”
you turn back to start looking again, when you hear hongjoong put his things down on the floor and join you
his hand is warm when it brushes over yours a little 
he’s never had someone cherish something he’s made like this before and so even if you two have to spend the whole night searching - he’s down for that
and when you do find it,,,,and there’s still time to take you to dinner,,,,he thinks he’s very much down for that too
seonghwa
spends half his day running away from potential suitors who come down from all the different departments just to ask him out for lunch or after work drinks
he’s just a low ranking officer, he doesn’t get what the craze is about?!?!
hongjoong, taking one hard look at seonghwa: i know what its about
seonghwa: plEAse tell me so i can live a peaceful life
hongjoong, sighing: dude. its your face
and even on the days when he comes in with glasses perched on the end of his nose and a slightly crumpled shirt from having to rush to iron in the morning
like it does not matter - he looks like and literally is - an angel
has a weird irritation about little spots on documents, like if dirt gets in the printer and its on the page hes like,,,,,eye twitching,,,,,,,,,no
three bottles, at least, of hand sanitizer on his desk 
his headphones match his laptop, which match his wireless keyboard, which match his mouse - the color scheme we are going for is a calming ivory 
once got called in for causing a disturbance, but it was literally not his fault, he went to ask the billing department if they had any extra ink and came downstairs with like five people all chattering at max volume about if he had plans next saturday
wooyung: damn man being beautiful must suck
seonghwa: oh thank you for understanding, it really is-
wooyoung: SIKE it rocks how do i know? look at me!
yeosang to seonghwa: just ignore him, he does this at least twice a day
you know seonghwa, how could you not, and you agree with the majority opinion: he is insanely handsome
but you have your own problems to worry about, that being a very nasty manager who seems to have it out for you
so like seonghwa, you spend half your day hiding from someone, which means 
solace in the supplies closet
one day, as you’re sitting inside there, trying to work on a memo draft on your phone 
the door swings open - and you jump to pretend like you’re looking for staples
but instead, it closes with a harsh noise and the person slides down against the door - heaving and fanning themselves
“a-are you ok?”
you ask, worried that the shortness of breath is from them feeling sick - when in reality its just seonghwa, on the run from lovestruck coworkers 
again
he shakes his head and mumbles that he’s sorry for barging in 
but you shake your head, tell him its fine
you’re both under this impression that one of you is going to bounce soon - like this is a supply closet, not the break room - but after about five minutes of utter silence
seonghwa goes, “are you also running away from work people who are in love with you?”
you giggle, but shake your head “actually running away from a work person who hates me.”
he gives you an apologetic look, but you just wave it off - not like there’s much either of you can do about it anyway
its silent for a while, and you keep trying to do as much editing as you can on your phone, not really paying attention to the way seonghwa’s eyes flick toward you in the dark
not until he clears his throat and is like, “well i think the coast is clear so ill be going back out there-”
you nod, thinking you should probably return too before your manager goes bonkers and says you’ve abandoned your position or something
as you near the door though - suddenly seonghwa shyly extends his arm
you blink in confusion and he just goes, “maybe if we go out together itll be less scary?”
the sentiment is adorable and you take his palm in yours, giving it a gentle squeeze
though the moment you two step out - there are at least ten pairs of eyes on you and suddenly seonghwa makes sure to swing your hands behind your backs
he leans down, “dont want anyone to get the wrong idea and then you end up getting hurt too.”
but you think about it for a moment before tugging your hands out into the open - a wave of gasps passes through the people around you like a wave through the sea
you tiptoe up and explain, “maybe if they think you’re taken they’ll back off?”
the sentence shouldnt make seonghwa’s heart jump in his chest like it does - but hey, maybe your plan will work
(or maybe your manager will hate you even more because what - you bagged SEONGHWA? OF ALL PEOPLE?)
yeosang
really really REALLY good at bullshitting stellar work
and not in a last minute oh shit kind of wooyoung way, but in a i dont actually know anything about the material but damn am i going to make it sound like i do kind of way
and to be fair, if yeosang stared you down in a board room meeting for fifteen to twenty minutes selling you a pitch and blinking like a cat on the hunt then like 
im pretty sure you’re just going to buy into the pitch
interns are scared of him because they think hes like the no nonsense, dont bother me type
which he plays into sometimes because its fun and the interns will do what he says without bothering him about it
but the reality is he can be quite silly,,,,,,,,,jongho has on occasion caught yeosang getting giddy over like kitten youtube videos on break and everytime yeosang is like you didnt see anything
and jongho is like sure, not until it becomes beneficial to me and i use it against you
yeosang: wh
jongho: so the weather, huh?
knows everyone’s business somehow, but only gets invested if its like super super super juicy - i.e. someone in corporate is stealing money or there’s a secret poker game on the weekend for promotions
like no, san, yeosang doesnt care that you lied on your taxes
you are one of the newer hires, not an intern, just new to the job 
and although everyones been pretty inviting - you kind of maybe really think that yeosang,,,,,,,,hates you
he has this routine, an hour before everyone leaves on friday he goes around the department to see if anyone wants to go downstairs and across the street to get some coffee with him
you asume its a kind of “yay the weekends here” thing - which you are very down for, but its been like a month since youve been here 
and yeosang has never asked you 
hell, he even asks intern mingi - who half the time is doing these starbucks runs so he doesnt have the pleasure of ever really saying no
you had chalked it up to - oh im new, and hes maybe shy? but that makes no sense because this is kang yeosang
shyness isnt an adjective you’d use for him - so the only other logical explanation is,,,,,,,you must have had a really horrible first impression
you decide to ask san about it - he seems pretty close to yeosang and hes also been super open with you - but when you go, “did i do something to make yeosang angry?”
san nearly spits out the rice he’s chewing on - he gets fidgety in his seat, something you arent used to seeing, and says he has to go
curious, you decide to ask wooyoung the same question - but get the same panicked response
so you as yunho, who gives you a sad puppy kind of look and then jongho, who just???????? chuckles
it makes no sense and you’re even more confused than before - when suddenly its friday and yeosang - yesong is approchaing your desk
“do you want to go to starbucks with me?”
the way you jump up and beam must seem like a schoolkid getting their first a+ on a project, but you don’t care - and as you follow yeosang out the whole office gives a big sigh of relief
in the elevator down, yeosang keeps himself tucked in the corner and the bliss you had felt starts to wear down
wait,,,,maybe he invited me because hes sick of me asking other people if he hates me? is he about to tell me he hates me over some iced coffee?!?!
but as you step out and make your way toward the cafe, yeosang stops - putting a light hand on your elbow
immediately you start apologizing, you dont know where it comes from - but like an open faucet you just start saying sorry for the most random things and yeosang just gives you a confused look that shuts you up
“wait - why are you apologizing to me?”
he inquires and your shoulders shake a little, “well,,,,,i mean - didnt i piss you off?”
he looks to the side and sighs, “far from it - actually i pissed myself off more than anything else.”
“huh?”
he crosses his hands before returning his gaze to yours, a fine pink dust settles over his skin
“its just, i was avoiding you because im not, im not like - you know im not like good at like asking - asking peopl- people i like -”
he starts to stutter, or better yet almost malfunction, as he tries to explain
you almost feel like apologizing again for making this so hard on him, when he just throws his hands up
“i like you - and not in the we’re just co-workers kind of way - and yes, i find it hard to approach people i find cute. there. im not mad at you and yes im aware i look like a fool, so lets just go get our coffee-”
your smile almost stretches off your face as you hear his words, instead of knowing what else to say you step forward and takes his hands into yours
“you dont look like a fool, and yes we should get coffee but only if you admit that this is kind of our first date-”
he holds back the urge to laugh but stares down into the sparkles of your eyes
“are you sure? starbucks on a first date is kind of,,,,,,,”
“im sure, ive been waiting for you to ask me to come to starbucks with you for a whole month so its very fitting”
you and yeosang have a good giggle about that - when you come back to the office, san asks where his hot chocolate is but you and yeosang are so busy rubbing shoulders and being even cuter together that you just walk past him
san: im so deeply hurt, but also so deeply moved by how sweet they look with one and other
wooyoung
the office has wildly differing opinions on him, but one things for sure: hes brilliant in the weirdest of ways
on a 9-5 basis he gets like one hour of work done on a good day but lets say like the company is going through a major crisis
the person with the lifesaving idea SOMEHOW will be wooyoung (aided by hongjoong who probably just needs to curb some of wooyoungs enthusiasm)
but yes, like people will write him off as giddy and loud - but hes not dumb 
wooyoung: “you can have a bachelors degree and do dumb stuff, like thats not illegal.”
jongho: “vandalizing the ceos car when you were an intern here is illegal though.”
wooyoung, eyes wide: “how do you know about- i never did that,,,,,,,,”
makes memes and shares them in the work gc and the only people who get them are san and jongho, san because he shares a brain with wooyoung and jongho because hes literally young
hongjoong and mingi everytime: i dont get it....
you are a transfer from the companys overseas office and wooyoung takes to you right away 
mostly because you’re different and know all this cool stuff that he doesnt 
and you really like his fun energy, even though yeosang will be like “dont get tricked by it”
so when you and wooyoung get paired for a marketing project - you are both over the moon
until
its the night before its due and you and wooyoung have. nothing
you’re both spread out in the empty confrence room, wooyoung chugging a monster energy - while you nearly fall asleep and drop the tablet you’re working on straight on your face
wooyoung is like “lets just ask for an extension” but you insist you cant, this is your first big project here and you want to make an impression
but the slump you’re both in is BAD 
suddenly wooyoung takes the tablet off your hands and you sit up, hoping he’s thought of something, but instead he blasts some pop song and you cringe as you fall back in your chair
“turn it off, i cant think with that noise.”
“c’mon, dancing will help us think of ideas.”
“wooyoung - seriously, we need to do some work or -”
he doesnt listen to you, he just pulls you up from your seat and twirls you around
you groan and try to tell him that its not going to work - but wooyoung just says it doesnt need to, you guys just need to have some fun before you die over this stupid project
you dont want to admit that hes right - that your body feels like its been reduced to a bag of sludge - so you let him twirl you again until you’re dancing too
the anxiety from the project loosens a little as you watch wooyoung dance unabashedly, tie swinging over his shoulder and dress shirt a mess
you join him, kicking off your shoes and just letting go for these ten blissful minutes
you don’t notice and as you turn toward wooyoung, your ankle catches on one of the chairs and you go tumbling toward him as he catches you and cushions your fall
you both laugh and wooyoung looks up into your smiling face - happy to see it bright after you’d looked so miserable the whole day
actually, he doesnt say it outloud, but this happiness on you is probably the most beautiful happiness hes seen on someone
it glitters and for a moment he doesnt want to let your inviting warm weight off of him
and then - just as his eyes wavier down a little from your eyes to your lips he goes
“AHAH! IVE GOT IT!”
you sit up and he follows suit, grasping your shoulders
“IVE GOT AN IDEA!”
you want to ask him how he got it, what prompted it, but hes already talking a mile a minute
and to be honest, hes pretty happy you didnt get to ask - the answers totally embarrassing - like whats he gonna say
your natural beauty inspired me? how,,,,,,,,how sweet - corny, he means corny!
san
he can most definitely turn on the charm when he needs to, making himself out to be put together and organized 
but troublemaking is just too good to pass up, no wonder he and wooyoung are often referred to as partners-in-crime
100% the host for the monthly office karaoke contest 
somehow the bartender always gets a little pale when san comes tumbling in because,,,,,,,he is clumsy and quite good at breaking things,,,,,,
he outwits seonghwa into helping him clean up his desk when it gets too crazy
and frequently gets bonked on the head by hongjoong who catches him falling asleep over the keyboard
or trying to play on the switch - but then getting his headphones disconnected and now everyone can hear tom nook’s voice
he adheres to the dress code, but likes to have sparkly pins in his hair or a colorful belt from time to time
just because the bleakness of corporate life SUCKS and is not san’s vibe at ALL
but hey, money.
you like san’s karaoke contests and really enjoy just how much he puts into the performances
even if everyone else is giving their half-baked effort on songs from the early 2000s
you yourself dont ever get up to sing, just because of a shyness thing and also you much rather just watch san cause havoc
until one day you show up and you and san are the only ones,,,,,,,,there
somehow - everyone else has things to do this evening - so you tell him you can just comeback next month
when he insists that no, you two can have fun together!
you end up on what someone might call an impromptu date with san,,,,,
where he does his favorite songs and you cheer while the bartender sends over two drinks “on the house” and whispers to you when you collect them that he hopes you can “be the person who will calm san down”
its awfully embarrassing,,,,,but at the same time kind of fun,,,,,,until san invites you up for a duet
you are saying no, but san is waving you over, and someone wolf whistles from somewhere
and before you know it you are up there - and san puts a hand on yours as he passes you the mic
you kind of mumble into the mic, and believe me its nothing like what san belts out when hes up there
and still - san is jumping up and down and looks like he’s legitimately having the time of his life
his energy kind of boosts your confidence and one might say you even sing a bit of the song
when the night is over, san offers to take the train with you to your stop and if you want - he’ll even take the time to walk you home
just as you two are about to emerge from the station, just sort of basking in each others presence you both get your email notifications from work
taking your phones out you read the message
subject: finally hooking those two up body: ‘so, bets on a kiss - do you think they kissed? i think they did, or at least got close to it - you know how san is during karaoke’
the next email appears, this one is from jongho
subject: re: finally hooking those two up body: ‘which idiot cc’d san and them on the email,,,,,,,,,,,,’
you and san sort of stare down at your screens and then back up at each other
the realization dawns on you: nobody was actually too busy for karaoke,,,,,,,the whole office just wanted to set you up on a date,,,,,,
you are truly at a lose for words when suddenly san is typing back and before you can question it you get a ping!
subject: re:re: finally hook those two up body: ‘haven’t kissed yet, but the nights still young.
yunho
everyone's handyman - and by everyone, i mean everyone. the janitor has asked him to screw in lightbulbs before.
fairly good worker all around, he can come in late on certain days because hes helping grandmas cross streets or saving kittens from trees
and there have been instances of tiny mistakes, mostly because his attention was on giving feedback to the interns
but yeah no complaints, hes never even been given like a warning
very tidy work appropriate outfits - like tie tucked into sweater vest baby
feels guilty when he does have enough lunch to share with every single person, you know hes bringing his jumbo salad bowl to work
the worst lie hes ever told on the job is pointing to his cup and being like, yep thats my morning coffee!!!
when in fact it was soothing decaffeinated earl gray tea because coffee makes him jittery
 your assigned to yunho for basic intern training and youre so lucky and thankful because like 
youve heard the horror stories, but he is seriously just an angel
and doesnt get annoyed at your questions and even helps out when you get confused
the only thing is that sometimes he gets so engrossed in showing you how to format this document
or where to get the copy paper 
that personal space sorta siezes to exist and now hes hovering over you with his big hands over your keyboard
or his chest pressed to your back as he helps get the supplies from the top shelf
and you are not complaining its just,,,,,,,,,,,you know,,,,,,,,embarrassing
and sometimes you have to excuse yourself
or just wiggle away and you dont want to hurt his feelings or anything 
its just you hate that with each day you see yunho’s smile in the morning and something in your chest gets a little tighter
and you are not about to date a co-woker, no way no how
even though yunho meets every checklist for the perfect boyfriend
because 1) its probably against the rules and 2) you dont want to just get your heartbroken by the man who is just that kind to everyone
until one day hongjoong makes an offhanded comment about how yunho has never taken this much of a liking to an intern like you
and you think about it all day, up until its the only thing on your mind and it takes yunho five tries of calling your name until you snap out of it and go
“huh?”
“hongjoong suggested this good place to eat, do you want to come have lunch with me since i didnt bring anything in today?”
your mouth works faster than your mind and you go,
“like a date?”
before immediately clamping your palm over and muttering an apology
but yunho’s ears go bright and he sort of loses his composure for a moment till a small, squeaky answer comes out
“yeah,,,,like a date?”
mingi
eager to please intern,,,,,,,but add in a dash of absolute obliviousness
like he wants to help everyone but sometimes the instructions from like five different people just turn to mush in his brain
and hes like delivering coffee to the wrong person or printing out three hundred copies of that poorly photoshopped meme wooyoung made instead of the needed documents
but no one can get mad at him because have you seen him? like it would be straight up illegal to even raise your voice at him
hes so sweet that numerous people offer their homemade lunches to him and hes always like eating a sandwich from hongjoong or freshly baked cookies from yunho 
the older ladies of the office just a d o r e him (a little too much, but like hes so sweet natured he doesnt even read into it)
his pants are always short and someone is always like poor mingi’s ankles are so cold
but at the same time he can lift like ,,,,, one hundred pounds of printer cartridge's so its like,,,,,,,,, ok so maybe those skinny ankles actually put in a lot of work,,,,,,,,
you’re the ceos only child and when they’re off on business, you’re in charge of the department where mingi interns
and like anyone else you have a huge soft spot for him, even though you dont try to show it because favoritism is a no-no
actually in general you try to be as fair and as understanding as possible, because your parent isnt really the type
a lot of the office really likes you, but now and then someone will say something snippy or rude about you 
simply because they think you got your job through just being the ceo’s kid or that you’re only lenient to try and get in with one of the office heartthrobs
you try not to take it personally and you bite your tongue when it comes to putting those rumors and the people who spread them in place
but one afternoon, you can clearly hear a group of people talking about how you lack the leadership skills to ever take over the company
it hurts, you can feel the pain in your chest, but you try to wrestle through it until you hear mingi’s voice
“i dont think you should say that about them.”
you turn and peek your head passed the cubical - mingi’s tall frame is standing in front of the pack
“what do you know, you’re just a lowly intern.”
“thats true, but ive seen them work and theyre really good at leading. theyre also doing two jobs at once - both theirs and the ceos, i dont think anyone here has to deal with so much work.”
youd think his tone was being mocking, just like theirs, but his voice is clean and clear
like hes just stating a truth he believes in 
when one of them starts badmouthing mingi, you step in and tug him away from the conversation as the office workers disperses back to their seats
you tug him toward the stairs and out of earshot and mumble a small thank you
“huh? why are you thanking me?”
“well you stood up for me so-”
he shrugs his shoulders, “i was just saying the truth.”
you nod, embarrassment on your cheeks as you realize that its mingi youre talking to - of course he wouldnt have any other motive but to -
“and theyre wrong you know, one of them was saying youre not pretty and thats a lie too. youre good at your job and -”
“wait, what”
you back up and mingi blinks - “i said youre good at your j-”
“no before that, you think im-”
“pretty?”
you both stare at each other as the realization sinks into mingi’s expression and he sort of opens his mouth like a gaping fish - 
“i-i - i just - i -”
you stiffle a giggle and shake your head, “no no, its nice that you think that. it makes me really happy.” 
“well, im just a lowly intern so i mean i dont know if its such a great compliment-”
you lean up and peck his cheek, making him freeze midstence
“youre not a lowly intern, i believe youre way more than that and sooner or later youll probably be promoted too!”
“pr-promoted? like to a worker or like ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,to,,,,,,,,,,your,,,,,,,,,,,,boyfriend,,,,,,,,,,,”
jongho
kid genius, has a higher position than most people double his age
knows everyone's secrets so no one even tries to start shit with him about it
loves watching the office go into chaos when the printer isnt working and apparently hes the only one who knows how to fix a goddamn paper jam
but hes on a coffee break, let him watch everyone tear each other apart before he actually just presses a button to fix this all
like mingi, he can actually lift way more than him, but why would he - the intern is there for a reason lol
probably has an early college degree from some prestigious school and he doesnt talk about it but he knows people whisper about it 
and hes like so what i still work at this dump but like what - is someone gonna rat on him to the ceo? - no, because he’ll just tell the ceo about that one time that person tried to charge the company card for their vacation plane tickets :) 
gets work done fast and early, spends the rest of the day just playing minecraft
you used to be jongho’s number one rival for youngest, smartest position
but he sorta beat you out over time and even though you were pissed about it for a long while
youve kinda gotten over the rivalry
instead youre comfortable in your other department and dont really see jongho around anymore
which you think is normal - and actually youre under the impression that jongho is happy to be rid of you
but the reality is he makes up way too many excuses to go up to your floor, i.e. “the bathroom is better there” “their breakroom has this k-cup i like” “the view from the windows are nicer”, etc.
no one notices, or if they do - no one dares to make a peep
but you ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, are starting to think its a little suspicious
so you confront him, as he stands awkwardly by the window at the end of the hall
“are you like spying on me?”
jongho turns around, dark eyes widening just a bit
“what? no. i just like the view.”
“jongho, your office is like three floors above mine - you arguably have the better view.”
he shrugs as if its nothing but you press on
“why are you coming down here - wait, oh my gosh - do you like someone in my department?!??”
you suddenly get bright and clap your hands together, “c’mon you have to tell me!”
he looks you over once and makes a hmph sound, “why would i tell you?”
you pout
“i know we were rivals for a while, but c’mon - i promise ill put in a good word for you so who is it?”
you step closer and jongho feels his tie get a little tighter
“the new intern? they’re cute - or is it someone older like in the-”
“you”
you stop and buffer - looking at him and for the first time jongho drops his eyes to the floor first
“m-me? you’re coming down here for me? is it because of our riv-”
“no.”
he sets the cup he was holding on the windowsill and suddenly you’re the nervous one
“you’re right. i come here because the person i like on this floor is you.”
he reaches out to touch your wrist but you step back, the confession is too shocking to handle and you scurry off before you can say anything in return
you slide down against the stall of the bathroom and let out the breath you’re holding
its not that you dont like jongho back, actually your whole rivalry was sort of just a cover up for your one-sided feelings
you just never thought that they’d be reciprocated,,,,,,,
you try to pull yourself together - marching out to the sink and looking into your reflection
we cant let jongho win again, he might have confessed first, but your still rivals no matter how much you like each other so just go out there and - and - 
you cant think of exactly the word, but before you know it your rushing out and to the stairs
jongho doesnt look too surprised to see you bust into his office - but the rest of the office turns to look at you two
“you-”
“yes?”
“yo-you cant say you like me first, why? well - well because ive liked you longer, so im saying it now. i like you. so i win. no arguing. take me to dinner. bye.”
and with that you turn on your heel, jongho nods - secretly smiling to himself as he puts on his headphones
yunho to mingi: isnt it crazy, jongho just got asked out in front of the whole office!
mingi, blinking: wait what? i thought that person was just mad at him
623 notes · View notes
kareofbears · 3 years
Text
persona 5 strikers thoughts and feelings
This is going to be a long post. Like, the type of post you’d only really have time to read when you’re trying to sleep but you’re not ready to be unconscious yet so you’re just looking for something to do to spend your time with minimal effort. 
So in 2018, a masterpiece was born into the world: Into the Spider-verse was released and it was amazing—it’s honestly the best spiderman movie we have without a doubt, and it’ll be very far into the future before Spider-verse is beaten as the best spiderman movie. Them’s the facts. Then in 2019, Spider-man: Far From Home was dropped. It’s a great movie! Great characters, great continuation of who these characters are and works fantastic as a continuation of a story. It’s really hard trying to take the torch of a previous movie (or in Marvel’s case, juggling twenty something movies) and come up with a new movie that both works on its own, as well as being the next step in this series of films. Thus, with that idea in mind, I think it’s kind of unfair to judge into the spiderverse and far from home, because these are two movies with two completely different objectives in mind. 
Okay, so this is still a persona 5 strikers post, I promise, but the idea is the same: Persona 5 could basically do whatever it wanted—new story, new characters, new everything, and it’s just plain old awesome. However, Persona 5 strikers did not have that sort of freedom. It was bound to the original game, and it had its own rules and stuff it had to keep intact, characters they had to work with, and on top of that, it had to justify its existence as a sequel (lets pretend money doesnt exist lmfao). 
SO, the big question is: did it do that? Did it justify its existence? 
And my answer: holy fuck did it ever do that
I came into this game knowing the extreme bare minimum. I knew there was someone named Sophia, and i knew there was roadtrip, and i knew there were Personas. That’s my knowledge of it before i played it on the Switch.  I should also clarify like, early on, that i was not expecting anything from this game. At all. I was the world’s biggest cynic of this game—if you scroll down my p5s tag far enough, youll just see me complaining about a game that hasn’t even come out yet. I was fully expecting to have this be a Waifu show, and any male character that isn’t Akira to just be shoved aside like some kind of nerd in a high school hallway, and i have never been more pleased to be wrong. In fact, i actually owe it an apology, because of how fucking rude i was for no reason!!! Because this game deserves everything to be honest. 
Persona 5 strikers is, frankly, insane. Insane in the sense that it got to pull shit off that just would never have existed in the original game, because the original game is scared. It had to be as impressive as possible and garner as much attention as possible. Strikers does not have that problem—every single person who bought that game does not need to be convinced that persona 5 is a good game. They already played it. That means Atlus can just fuck around and have a good time, and man did they have a good time. There’s still scenes that still shock me if i think about it too hard, because i’m used to atlus having to follow this sort of rule set when it comes to persona 5 (or any of the main games im assuming, but i havent played them.) And on top of that, there’s still shit that’s Atlus Trademarked Branded in a good way. The style of story of story telling, and revealing the mystery that is so integral to what p5 is, is still there. 
So, to make this even a little bit comprehensible, i will make a list! 
First of all, What is this game?
In short, this game is an OVA of an anime. It’s bonus side content that has one thing in mind: to showcase these lovable characters more by putting them in fun situations. That’s it, and it is just phenomenal. That was the main point of, i’d say, like forty hours of the game. It’s just fun times with fun characters. 
But to get deeper of what i think is happening, or what they were thinking during the development, is that this is a second opportunity. Persona 5 (as we all know) had a lot of problems, and we were not quiet about those problems. We yelled it all out, made posts, made complaints on every social media platform ever. And Atlus heard all of them, and Strikers is a way to mitigate those mistakes. Aside from being a fun OVA, Strikers also works to be a deeper exploration of these characters—more specifically, the characters that did not receive much in the original game. Creating this sequel is having the ability to redo what they felt (or to be more specific, we felt) in the original game while adding new ones. I will get to that in a second.  
The format of the game 
Absolutely brilliant to throw them on a road trip. P5V already forced us to experience Shibuya for 200+ hours, and im so glad that they didn’t do that again. Going from town to town, making us experience these new places alongside our favorite characters is so good, and it just makes sense. It’s fun, it’s lighthearted, and it’s actually shockingly good. But one thing i do want to talk about early on is the way the story unfolds and the villains that they use, and what they do with it because it’s very interesting. 
So as we explore japan and stuff, we encounter jails, and with those jails comes an antagonist. This antagonist works to be a parallel to one of our characters. That character will find it in their hearts to feel bad for the antagonist, because the antagonist could have been them had the original game not happen. At first I thought all of the thieves were gonna get an antagonist, and i was really hyped for the ryuji one. And then came to hour forty of the game where i realized “yeah that’s not gonna happen. There’s just not enough time.” And i was right, and the game ended. But i am not salty at all, honestly, because the people who got a direct antagonist were: Ann, Yusuke, and Haru. (we wont count zen and sophie). 
Is there a trend??? Yes. these are all characters in the original game that have received the worst treatment by atlus. The three of them are basically cast aside the minute they finished their original arc, and its horrible! BUT that’s why this is the path that atlus chose for them—to give them more depth, and screentime, and a way to show their inner self. That isn’t to say that the ones who aren’t those three (makoto, futaba, mona, akira, ryuji) didn’t get anything. Futaba still has her thing at the end with ichinose, and she was very prevalent and animated during the rest of the game. Mona and Akira have to be a focal points, that’s just the nature of the game. The other two though, I will talk about in depth in a second.  
Makoto
Y’all i poke fun at shumako fans sometimes cause its kind of easy and fun, but i honestly love makoto. In my very first playthrough of p5 (my first ever jrpg game, first persona game, i had no idea what i was doing), i had only maxed out two characters: ryuji and makoto. And i know she had a lot of screentime and love in the original game which is great, but i truly felt like she was dissed in this game. Her only roles were
A driver
Someone to tell them “we don’t have a choice. Let’s keep going and see where this takes us.” (seriously, if you replay this game, you will see how much she does this)
Idk, i just wish she had more to do, especially compared to how much love they gave the other characters. 
But let’s talk about some of the new characters! 
Zenkichi
Damn you atlus. Damn you and your insistence at bringing in cop characters. I was fully on board with hating zenkichi, i was fucking ready for it. I was convinced that there was nothing they could do convince to like zenkichi. I was immune to their copaganda. 
And then i ended up loving him, which makes me sad a little bit. I didn’t realize how desperate i was to have an adult who has a persona. Someone who wants the world to change just as much as they do, while still having that aspect of them that makes them adult. Like??? As someone who is technically an adult, its a breath of fresh air. An adult. Who fights. For justice. Using a persona. And god i love akane so much, and her obsession with the thieves (that scene is probably in my top ten fave scenes of the game). Also what i loved about zenkichi is that he fucking hates the cops!! He hates the system of the cops!! And thats why i actually really started to love him!! Because i thought it was atlus saying that the systematic problem of the police cannot be solved by one person, and zenkichi threw away his badge. I actually cried at that part!! 
But then he became a cop again, and i was just :/ but as a character, i really love him to bits and would love to do a study on him, or at least use him as an outside pov. But! i absolutely love his persona, since im a les miserables fan hehe
Sophia 
she’s probably my favorite new aspect of the game. I was ready to not like her—again, i just suck like that, lmfao—and when i saw her, i was scared that she was just another waifu. I mean, she was very cute after all. But then as the game went on, i thought she was a little too cute. And even further into the game, i finally slapped myself in the face and realized oh my god shes not a waifu. Shes a sister. 
That blew my mind, im ngl to you. A female character that isn’t supposed to be romanced? By jove, what a miracle! 
And she…is an amazing character. Im sorry, i just love her so much. I love her so much that she  probably ranks as my fifth or sixth favorite character which is surprising even to me. Everything about her is delightful and invigorating. She’s funny??? Her comedic timing is amazing, and she has such chemistry with the rest of the team. She’s actually useful to the plot, and while her character design is a little too on the nose for me in terms of cuteness (i mean, good god she’s wearing oversized sweater to show how cute and tiny she is, and her hair has literal hearts in it), she is absolutely lovable. 
But what i actually really wanna gush about for a second is sophia at the last stage of the game. You get the idea, i dont really like to get excited over things, so at this point i figured that there was nothing this game could do to shock me. 
And then sophia had a persona awakening. 
Like. holy fuck did i yell. I didnt realize what was happening until the music had already kicked in. and its just so fucking smart!!! Sophia??? The ai?? With no heart?? gOT A PERSONA???? AWAKENING??? BECAUSE SHE LEARNED WHAT THE HEART IS AND THE PASSION THAT YOU NEED IN ORDER TO GET A PERSONA??? I started crying honestly, because it was just so smart. And looking back on it now, its obvious!! Of course it would lead to this, it only made sense that the culmination of her character arc leads to her getting a persona, nothing else would have been as good. Also, her voice actor is just amazing?? When she was talking to ichinose at the end, i actually got incredibly emotional because of the line reads. Its just so spot on and it really captures the essence of sophia.
Muah. five stars Atlus. You got me. 
Ryuji <3!!!!
Oh man. Oh boy. Okay. so where do i start. 
Yall know i love him. Hes probably my favorite fictional male character of all time, and he is the one i was the absolute most cynical about in this game. I was expecting literally nothing. Nothing. Like. nothing. I thought he was just gonna keep being used as a joke, or a gag, and he’s gonna be super horny all the time for the other girls and it was gonna make me mad and there was gonna be some insane homophobic/queerphobic jokes in every other scene and i know i was being unfair, but i cant help it. 
And then i played the first two hours of the game, and i cried the entire time. Because ryuji has never been better than he is in this game. Its crazy. 
The ryuji in persona 5 strikers is who ryuji should have been/how he should have been treated this entire time. From the actual funny jokes (for example, the gold bar joke + his reaction to it in the beginning of the game), defending his female friends instead of being the one people need to defend from (natsume arc), and the fact that he was the one to be there with morgana and akira in the very beginning of the game. Its such a small thing that they didnt even need to do, but it was such an integral part of the original game for me, that i just was convinced that nothing like this was going to happen. But then it happened. Its just small stuff like that that could have been overlooked but it wasn’t because this game? Persona 5 strikers? Fucking loves ryuji. 
The actual respect they gave this boy is insane and i wasn't ready for it. Like, they gave the shujin trio lunch, they gave the little charm of the katana when they were in natsume’s jail, and, in my opinion this is the second-best thing that they could have given ryuji is sophia. Ryuji and sophia are the pinnacle of a brother & sister bonding relationship in the game that isn’t akira & futaba. And its really prevalent too?? Small stuff from the beginning of the game (pulling her out of a jail, calling her shorty), but then you have the iconic “shut the fuck up” scene, and that scene was so well characterized and written and voice acted, that somehow him saying “fuck” was the least exciting part of that scene to me. Ryuji is an older brother to her, like its undoubtable, and its only further cemented at the end of the game where Ryuji helps out ichinose because he knows how much sophia cares about her. This game. Love ryuji. And i love. This game. 
You know what else i love? Akiryu. 
Guys. i was fully prepared to starve in terms of akiryu. But theres just. So much of it. I wont get too deep into it, because i think this aspect of the game for me still needs marinate a little bit. Like, what was that last shot when EMMA died and Ryuji walked to approach Akira so they could relish in their victory together?? And the smile from both of them??? What the fuck. That was amazing. Also Joker being saved by Ryuji when he was about to fall from the cliff to save sophia??? WHAT. The LEADER AND HIS RIGHT HAND MAN? WHAT. anyway. If theres anything i want to keep for myself in my own brain, its the akiryu aspect of this game, so i wont talk too much about that part of things (instead, itll probably manifest in fic lmfaooo). 
Sure, there’s tidbits of stuff i dont like that they gave ryuji: sexualizing ann in that one cut scene and making him touch the jails even though it hurts, and i recognize those and frown at them, but for the most part, i am blown away with how they treated him.
Basically, Ryuji has never been better. From the opening of the game with him being the first text message and the one to sling his arm around akira, to the very last cut scene where it was ryuji wordlessly leaving because he’s so confident that they would never be separated for long, this game adores Ryuji and i am so so happy to say that.
The Royal aspect of things
Yeah, i had to talk about this, but itll be a short thing i just wanted to point out. Because the last part of this game...is persona 5 royal. Which is curious. Like taking reality and giving that power to someone else so you dont have to experience suffering anymore? And even like, the final section just looked a lot like the top half of maruki’s palace?? And whats even crazier is that we had a boss fight with sophia, just like how we had a boss fight with sumire? Royal and Strikers have like, the same thesis statement. It’s kind of uncanny.It’s interesting, it’s like atlus came up with these two ideas, and then just decided they liked both of them so much that they just did it twice. I don’t mind though—actually, in terms of how the last Palace/Jails go, i probably like them both about equally. 
Though i did love the final battle in this one more than i did in royal. Splitting into teams?? Thats cool as fuck, and really innovative and i didnt see it coming. It also kicked my ass. A lot. 
Now for the last stretch: the small stuff!
The music — bomb as fuck. In my heart, Daredevil is ranked the same as Rivers. Axe to grind is also amazing, but Daredevil owns me
Akechi — i really debated whether or not to talk about him, but i figured a bullet point should be enough. Im really shocked that he wasnt in this at all. Like not even a name drop. If this is an OVA, and the point of the game is to please the fans, and akechi is arguably the fan favorite character, i was really ready for something. But there was nothing, except for the pancake hallway if that even counts as a reference. Thats it. Thats all i wanted to say about him.
The humour — FUCKING HILARIOUS im convinced that in my fifty hour playtime, five of that is dedicated to me laughing and unable to continue the game 
Akira — so much personality! His lines of dialogue are crazy sometimes (like. Whats up with him saying Ryuji has ‘nice abs’ when they were in bath? Im crazy and even i dont know what the fuck that could mean) 
Battle system — oh my god i almost forgot to talk about this. I love it! I kind of miss the turn based aspect just because i found it very comforting for some reason, but this hack and slash style of gameplay is so invigorating because i do feel like it justifies shit like the baton pass and huge attacks.  This battle system fully encompases how the Phantom Thieves are supposed to fight, you know what i mean?
Anyway, thats my thoughts on strikers. Loved it. Amazing. 9.3/10, wouldve been higher but Konoe’s Jail almost bored me to death. Also im a monster and i didnt do any requests that isn’t a fun one, teehee. As if i play persona 5 for the persona aspect of things.
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biclarisselarue · 4 years
Note
Do you have more headcanons for the bachelor in paradise AU?
damn we really dredging up old posts of mine i love this!! and absolutely!! i am so sorry if any hardcore bachelor in paradise fans see this bc i am sure i’ll get details of the show wrong BUT since you asked ;)
percy is, of course, instantly a fan favourite, and i’m talking like twitter stans, LOTS of gifs, speculation posts etc...
him and rachel have a chaotic friendship that is full of teasing, like sibling-level kind of? but they also have lots of late-night chats caught by the cameras and that’s what make people go nuts over them
they kiss once (1) bc the producers are nudging them towards it and you know they’re both single, attractive people who are good friends so why not? and it’s a nice kiss! but they both agree there was practically nothing behind it even if audiences still go feral over their interactions (until someone else shows up but i’ll get to that later)
after the show rachel becomes really popular on instagram bc of how genuine and funny she is & she definitely rubs it in percy’s face that she has more followers than he does
so: clarisse and percy go on a date, and you may be wondering, grace, what was the date? of all the cruel things, the producers sent them on a walk on the beach! followered by candelit dinner! and light night stargazing! and no, they were not allowed to bow out so they tried to grit their teeth and bare it but holy shit percy can you chew any louder??? versus oh i’m sorry, i didn’t realize i was trying to impress anybody!! so yeah. obviously nothing comes of it but its probably one of the funniest moments on the show and they do become closer afterwards even if they would Literally Never admit to it
piper n jason come on around the same time midway through and IMMEDIATELY the producers are like ok now go on a date!! and bc of the ambiance and atmosphere, they kinda get lost in that? so like, lots of making out and not really actually getting to know each other but they have a blast taking advantage of the suites
near the end, piper has a long talk with annabeth n she realizes.. she doesn’t actually know jason? like sure, he’s a hot piece of ass but what’s beneath that ass of gold? she has no clue really, so she breaks it off
(at a cast reunion, they catch up and bond after finding out they both had a crush on reyna, and jason asks her out on a real, no camera date) (they get married two years later) 
now!! when annabeth shows up... the whole vibe changes
like yeah, grover n juniper were clearly going to get engaged at the end, and clarisse n percy were fun, and percy and rachel was interesting, but it was still all very.. reality tv show kind of gimmicky if you know what i mean?
when annabeth arrives, it grounds the show
there’s clearly something serious and real between her and percy and that gets more fans hooked than any dramatic twist the producers could cook up
they both kind of fight it in the beginning because a) it’s a reality tv show b) they are very much attracted to each other and scared the emotional part won’t live up to it and c) neither of them wants to get actually hurt especially not when everyone is watching their every move
so they dance around it but as episodes go by they become better and better friends (i mean i guess everyone does really but esp these two)
they do go on multiple dates bc that’s what the audience wants and they’re a bit shy n sweet at first but quickly (im talking first ten minutes) use it to just ROAST the other person n have a lot of laughs
on the last episode before annabeth leaves, percy sneaks them both out to the pool, and his intentions are honestly just to talk because he knows he really likes her and wants to try things without cameras and without all of that crap but she looks so fucking pretty in the moonlight and her green bathing suit that whoops- now they’re kissing
annabeth is the first one to notice the cameras who have finally caught up to them and they share one last kiss underwater before parting ways with a promise: to make their way back to each other after it’s all done
spoiler: they keep that promise
and yes, if you were wondering, the emotional part absolutely lives up to the physical
(and audiences finally get a clear picture of them together after annabeth sees a creepy paparazzi following them on their third date and kisses percy senseless in a crowded street out of spite) (he definitely does not mind i mean... annabeth is Hot when she takes charge)
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savnofilter · 3 years
Text
TW: MENTIONS OF DISCOURSE, GR//MING, P/D/PHILIA, ASS//LT, C//NSENT, D//RK CONTENT.
- this isnt under a read more because i want people to read this, but please read past this/tread carefully if you cannot handle such topics. this is not meant to be interacted with.
I'm not sure how to really go about this. I've been overthinking if I should address this and bring up some stuff while I've been gone, so sorry the absence. I deleted the tumblr app a few days ago and I downloaded it again today so i could post this. I really don't like making posts like this because it cuts the vibe that I've been trying to portray that everything is okay and it makes me feel really disconnected to you guys. I am sorry for the abrupt absence and cutting off any source of communication between us. I knew if I left any form of direct line of talk to me that I would receive hate and I just mentally decided that I cant sit through being harassed right now.
Have you guys ever paid attention to the same people who always have a statement to say or is always in discourse? It's very telling how everyone can post about me, but I shouldnt dare post about them. I'm tired of not being able to post about what I want without people vague posting about me, bringing me up every time they start another discourse with another writer or directly talking about me. My days on here are starting to feel the same. Its good then it goes bad. Good goes bad and bad goes good. It's not even tiring, annoying, or angering -- its repetitive. When I'm not saying anything people create fake stories about me, and when i speak about it im the one starting discourse. Don't get me wrong, I'm nowhere near perfect and I have made my own mistakes. But why the fuck am I always being told to be the mature one, why am I the one who should've done better, why do you people expect so much from me. It's the fact people are always quick to say, "no one cares about you, youre fishing for attention" when they're the ones who vague and interact with me while ive been minding my business for months now. Hm. The fact people have me proudly blocked but still harass me anyways shows a lot about themselves than it does for me. How its such an issue that im a minor until it comes to demonizing, tearing down my character, gaslighting, lying and bullying. I'm a literal example of how their friend group manipulates their followers and exiles people from fandoms for not kissing their ass. except now its in your face.
Consider this my last post about this discourse. I'm not going to waste my time on people who fail to digest other peoples thoughts and opinions time and time again because theyre weak narcissists. If I so choose to decide to shit post my opinions or argue with someone, none of you should be aggravated or moved by it because youre not even supposed to be on my page. If its not something serious i will not be wasting energy that i can be using to build on myself as a growing person than on miserable old ladies that have to use fanfiction to have excitement in their pity, depressing and lackluster lives. If people so do choose to create stories or vague about me, I do not care. So I ask respectfully to people who do lurk on my page to not attempt to message, post or vague about me please. This includes sending anons to yourself to make shit happen.
Past that, something got me thinking. My (older) friend had showed me screenshots of adult writers (no one i have spoken to) that were very excited to write underaged reader with adult characters. There are other instances where writers (that you have probably read from) on here openly made reader underage while aging characters up as adults/with adults. There are many more but there's really no point in listing them nor do I really care. But least to say, the same people who are gung-ho over these pedophilic themes/stories are the same people who support predatory people.
I've been thinking about whether or not i should continue writing for the students anymore. Granted, I still think they're attractive because one snap of the fingers cant stop that. I had been teetering on this thought for awhile because of how borderline pedophilic the people are here towards my age group. I enjoy writing but not to the point of willingly being in a straight line of sight where people who are well over 16 are harassing me and lurking on my page, especially to other minors solely because they are my friends. Backtracking to the statement before, I honestly dont know if I will either stop writing or just for the students as a whole. It shows that clearly some people are using their attraction to teens with the excuse that the characters are fake. The rapid normalization on dark problematic "kinks" is disgusting and vile, and the fact that its discourse now to shame said interests is appalling. Concluding that combined with my experiences here, i feel unsafe.
***(TRIGGER WARNING)*** I dont talk about my personal life on here that much cause I dont see the need too nor do i think its anyone's business. Paired with the fact that the people i have trusted personal information with have used it against me, I will be preventing myself from opening that door. Besides that for now, I have sparsely shared I've been assaulted before. This is my first time really opening up about this and i kind of find it necessary now. Coming from someone who has been a victim of assault and CP by people my age and well over, writing nsfw has been the only way where I could feel comfortable with sex in general. I won't get into details because mentioning this is triggering already and can make people uncomfortable. It feels like anywhere I go, I'm constantly putting myself in a position to be abused. The same people who told me I didn't have to worry about my age and be judged for it, exposed the minimum comfort of keeping myself private online to demonize, judge and hurt me. People call me "extra" for being distraught about my face and age being posted because they think im trying to be sneaky which isn't the case. Its the principle that they KNEW I wasnt ready to share said things, and coming from someone who is inherently a private and closed person, she knew damn well what she was doing when posting screenshots of me on Tumblr. There is no excuse for it. The same writers who write dub/non-con can BARELY understand basic consent and its fucking terrifying. This site was the only other place I could cope without being criticized. To see people who some i was close to proudly lie on my name, (adults) say that i sent them pornographic content without their consent is so very hurtful. To watch people supposedly be victims and then use their own trauma to invalidate my own was so fucking humiliating, disgusting and nerve wracking. Although I knew I made the terrible decision to interact with stories, I have never initiated any NSFW discussion with anyone in DMs unless they did it with me first and a few times -- and trust me raise your hand I'll show you the proof. I was sure that everyone I talked to regularly knew that I was a minor, and to my general consensus, people were under the impression I was 15/16 (which I was and am).***
Whether it be victim blaming from the grooming discourse, I've been met with racism, harassment towards my friends, people wanting me to harm myself and be assaulted. I fear what will happen when i will turn 18, if the harassment will escalate and what not. A big part of me is that I'm still here anyways because it pisses people off and I don't care when I receive hate. I can take it but I don't want it. A good conscious of me knows that I should be doing what's best for me but at the end I'm still attached to my ego-self with the added fact that I sincerely enjoy interacting with my followers and posting stories.
I just don't know how the options look. I'll probably be updating my blog rules as of right now. I've been writing more sfw lately because of this and it'd be nice if you guys supported those until I properly decide. I still have plenty of requests of a bunch of characters (mostly Bakugo and Dabi) and original stuff (all sfw & nsfw) that I really wanna share with you guys. But I just ask that what I do modify that you will respect it like you would to any other writer on here.
Stay safe, keep your mask on, and thank you.
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hu4ngs · 4 years
Note
royalty au for jaehyun??
omg YASSSSSSSSSSS i love jaehyun so much p l e a s e
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ok so royalty au huh
okay lets see
so this kinda ended up like a strangers to lovers au because im cliche like that
so jaehyun is quite a famous crown prince
he’s known very well for his peaceful ways of finding solutions to problems other than war
not too mention he’s a strong prince too
and on top of all of that he’s very kind
he’s literally a whole package i would marry him no cap
n e ways
a lot of kingdoms wishes to marry their child to him
jaehyun, too, wishes to be in love and marry too
but he never gets the chance
because most noble families just doesn’t catch his eye
the king and queen respects his decision
because he can even be a single king if he wants too. no pressure at all for mr princey here
jaehyun also believes in soulmates
so, he thinks when the time is right, he will cross paths with his soulmate
and when the time comes, only then will he marry
so anyways
one day, on a particular afternoon, the kingdom of jung was greeted by a sudden visit by your kingdom  — by you
you visited along with your parents with the purpose of proposing
you were the firstborn of your kingdom
you had always dreamt of marrying someone handsome and charming —   much like jaehyun — if only you weren’t so shy
plus, your kingdom had a rule that the ruler must be of a married couple
and your father wants to step down soon, which mean the pressure is on for you
so here you are, you’ve travelled far just to propose
this isn’t how you wanted it to happen
you always imagined it’s the prince that will propose, not you
and yet here you are
so now you’re standing in front of jaehyun’s parents, and jaehyun himself, with your handmaiden next to you along with your offerings to him
but there was silence
your mind actually went blank you don’t know what to do
“your highness” your handmaiden whispered
“huh?”
“say your lines…”
“OH!”
you cleared your throat
you’re so nervous omg you’ve never done this before
“your royal highness, prince jaehyun, i- uh- i stand before you with offerings!”
you were stuttering, your face was red, you’re sweating, you’re all over the place
and jaehyun watched you with amusement
he’s been proposed before, but he’s never seen a proposal as clumsy as this
you rambled on with whatever you had to say, jaehyun wasn’t sure what you were saying either, but you were fun to watch
after you were done, there was silence
your handmaiden was having a secondhand embarrassment
after that long, awful pause that was killing your insides slowly, jaehyun giggled
he shocked his parents, you, and basically everyone that was in the same room
“is this supposed to happen? why is he laughing?”
“i don’t know, your highness”
“did i fail?”
“i’m not sure, your highness”
you glanced at jaehyun, who had a small smile to his face as he stared at you, “you’re funny, princess.”
that was all that he said, before he retreated
and that was it for that day
you were excused
but since you live far away, you were allowed to stay in the kingdom for a few extra days.
that night, you told your mother exactly what happened
and she laughed too
she assured you that you can try again the following day
but you’re not even sure if you want to try again
what’s the use anyways? he had laughed at you
it felt like he spat on your face
you went to bed with that heavy feeling in your heart; failure
the next day you woke up a little later than usual
so there was no one at breakfast except for you
as you were half eating, half admiring the interior design of the palace
you didn’t notice jaehyun had joined in too
he sat at the other end of the table, afraid that if he sat anywhere closer, it would bother you
when you noticed him, your face turned as red as your morning dress
“y-your highness! good morn- uh- hello- um hi?”
he laughed again
his laugh sounded so sweet, though, you kinda felt honoured he thinks you’re an idiot
“you’re very amusing, my dear,” he told you
the nickname shouldn’t have bothered you as much as it did
he was far from you, but you still couldn’t stand looking at him
you’re embarrassed, nervous, anxious, everything
“you woke up late?” he asked
you’re kinda surprised he’s actually bothered to talk to you honestly
you nodded
“you, too?” you asked, you’re glad the funny tone has left you, and you’re not as nervous as you were seconds ago
he shook his head, “no, i just had a bit of a wardrobe malfunction” 
you nodded awkwardly, not knowing what to say
“you don’t propose often, do you?” he suddenly asked
you thought you were over with being embarrassed, but now that he mentioned the event from before again…
you slowly shook your head
“that was my first time” you mumbled, loud enough for jaehyun to hear, though
jaehyun was impressed
“you’re cute, you know that?”
the alarms in your head were going off like crazy
your eyes widened
did he just call me cute
am i cute to him
so did i manage to woo him like what my mum told me to?
after noticing how silent you are
jaehyun decided to leave
he understands you’re probably super flustered anyways
and he kinda feels bad for complimenting you like that
clearly you’re not in the right headspace to accept straightforward compliments like that
later on the same day, you decided to wander off on your own
you didn’t have anything better to do anyways
as you wander off, you came across a music room
you love music
you’re especially skilled in playing a particular chinese instrument, guzheng
you doubted there was one in this music room, though
but to your luck
there was one!!
but it looked a little older compared to the other instruments
not forgetting to be cautious, you look around to see if anyone was nearby
its not that you’re prohibited to play an instrument in the music room or something, you just didn’t want people to watch you because you’ll get nervous
when you’re sure no one’s around you started playing the instrument
you were playing a song that you haven’t practice as much for, thus you were making a few mistakes here and there
but it’s okay, no one’s around anyways
after you were done, you sat there, kinda proud
like, you did that!!
without any musical sheet too
as you were sitting there, giving yourself an imaginary pat on the back
you heard someone walking
“i thought something was weird!”
it was the familiar, sweet voice again
it was jaehyun
you quickly tensed
jaehyun was so close to you
like this super handsome, charming, talented prince is literally next to you
“you played beautifully”
you look away to save yourself
not only is he close to you than he has ever been before, he also appreciated your talent
“i made a lot of mistakes though”
you finally forced something out of your throat
jaehyun hummed in response, he then took a seat next to you
now hes like super close
you could literally feel his body heat now
your heart is genuinely about to burst
it’s not that you’re a virgin to all of this or something
it’s just that jaehyun is super attractive ok
“well yeah, but if you could play as good as that without a music sheet, how well will you do with one?” he asked
you looked at him, and he looked at you
you kinda wanna kiss him ngl but you’re a p r i n c e s s you can’t do this
“you’re really… kind” you finally said
you were genuine
this whole time
jaehyun has been nothing but nice to you
no matter how many times you’ve screwed up
he never stops treating you like a human being rather than a princess and/or soon-to-be queen
and he has never looked down on you, either
you thought that he couldn’t have been bothered to approach you after all that proposing mess, but he proved you wrong
you’re touched, honestly
it’s literally been about a day and a few hours since you met him but you kinda understand why so many kings tries so hard to marry their child off to jaehyun
“when i heard you play from a distance just now…”
he trailed off
you snapped out of your own train of thoughts and gave your attention to him
“it reminded me of my grandmother, she’s… well, she’s no longer with me now, but she used to play this guzheng when i was a boy,”
“i don’t have much memory of her, but i remember her playing this elegantly so clearly”
you’re kinda in daze
like wow did he just opened up to you
jaehyun chuckled
“sorry, i got a little nostalgic there” he laughed
you laughed too, “no worries” you told him
he looked over to you, and smiled
“are you sure you’re ready for marriage, your highness?”
you were taken aback with his sudden question
but then again, jaehyun has been doing nothing but surprise you so far
so you decided to just be honest
you shrugged
“i honestly don’t know, but i don’t mind, either. if i’m being married off to the right person, then all is fine.”
“will you mind if i marry you then?”
you choked on your own saliva lmAo
you’re like WHAT
but you can’t just scream that to his face wtf
“are you serious?”
he nodded confidently
“i’d love to get to know you, you’re a curious one, dear”
you smiled shyly
HE CALLED ME DEAR AGAIN!! IF HE DOES IT AGAIN I’LL GET A HEART ATTACK
“i’m just an idiot.” after a long pause, you finally joked, and he laughed
and there it is again, that laugh that sounds so much like a tune
“it’s refreshing to have a trainwreck around me, you know? every second i’m with you, you never fail to amuse me.”
there it is again, those damned warm, nice and encouraging words that could melt the snow during the cold, cold winter
he called me a train wreck, but it’s okay, i am a train wreck
“so what do you say?” he asked
you paused for a moment
i mean…
prince jaehyun is a whole package
plus he’s so nice to you
having to spend the rest of your life with somebody who treats you humanely and accepts your flaws? that’s a jackpot
“of course i’d marry you! i proposed to you, damn it!” you said, and hit him jokingly
he laughed again
and you laughed too
after a moment of laughter
you two just sat there staring at each other
jaehyun is a charmer, yes
but he’s also just a shy bean deep down
he knew this was an opportunity to kiss you or whatever
but he felt like it was too early for that
so instead, he tucked the few strands of your hair behind your ear
“i have a feeling, that you’ll be an amazing queen, one day,” he said almost quietly, almost like he was whispering
you felt touched by his words
god he’s so sweet i wanna marry this man
“we just met, but it feels like i’ve known you my whole life.” you told him with a smile
he couldn’t help it
he ended up kissing your forehead
you never thought you’d fall in love so quickly
but you did
and you fell for prince jaehyun
and you’re not worried, because jaehyun is worth falling for
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Text
I'm ignoring my responsibilities in favor of watching the All Malec Moments video compilation so get ready for a livewatch no one asked for
Hodge is so incredibly wrong about everything he says about Magnus and it's kind of impressive because all he says is heavily supported by the Clave's files, which. Is proof of how great Magnus is at manipulating them and having them think exactly what he wants them to, tbh. Especially considering that as much as Magnus closes off emotionally, he was always very caring and kind to all other downworlders and warlocks, like, they all know they can trust him, he was named HWoB, he has a thousand kids, he took them all into hiding, etc. But the Clave and circle members are still 100% sure he's a super greedy lothario who's good for nothing but partying, and like. Obviously it's because they racist but they have an intelligence system and a file full of pictures and information and it all seems to support what Hodge is saying about him. So like Magnus was quite literally living a double life, with a whole personality he put up for shadowhunters and enemies, and another for his allies and friends, and even that one isnt 100% him because he was still trying to protect himself by closing himself off from relationships. and thats fucking impressive like my man is so smart i love him
Their first official talk is so funny magnus literally goes "I'm magnus" and Alec goes "Alec" and then he smiles and then he just goes. "Oh yeah right we should uh we should go to the hmm youhavebeautifuleyes what's it called hm" and its hilarious because they exchanged three (3) words and Alec is already all lost because Magnus is just That Beautiful. also all Magnus has to do is introduce himself and Alec smiles for the first time in 4 episodes like bro. bro. seriously. help him
he's SO frustrated when Alec doesn't get the "i love a dirty lair" flirt like he does that little eyebrow raise and hes just like "what the hell i thought that was GOOD" but Alec's head is legit playing wii music
Magnus pays izzy for "defending the warlocks" i had forgotten about that and it makes me so soft ;-;
Magnus and Izzy were just vibing with magnus asking her what presents Alec likes and clary immediately interrupts to ask about the memory demon like homophobic from day one i guess
Magnus is positively impressed by the way Clary goes "I'll do anything to save my mother" you can see how much he values loyalty right then have i mentioned that i love him
we talk about the "I'm talking to you" part a lot but we never mention how Magnus just throws that one and yeets off with clary not even waiting for a reaction he's just like that's RIGHT bitch you have beautiful hazel eyes too! do with that what you will i am now summoning a demon goodbye forever
the second him and Clary are away from the rest he tells her not to trust anyone and to be careful, like... ugh he cares so much it's unreal and again very deliberate, flirt a little, give izzy a necklace, throw in some innuendos, make it seem like it's all very innocuous so no one bothers to follow them or listen in when he goes away with Clary alone, and then immediately warn her about the clave when he gets away from the others. like he cares so much and he's so good at keeping that visible only for those he wants to it's astounding, my man is so talented and i hate that he had to learn to do that to survive but god i admire him and how committed he is to helping others too. like he could say "welp who cares it's dangerous imma go fuck off" like ragnor did but not only did he stay but he had a huge vulnerability with all his generosity and he never gave that up not for a second, even as he closed himself off from having any close friends or family or lovers, he never was anything if not generous and kind
the way he deliberately calls Jace shadowhunter in the most uninterested and even lowkey condescending way after the "pretty boy" incident idndjdndi we stan a king
the way Alec and magnus hold hands to summon the demon and even Magnus seems a bit shocked at the intensity of the sound and the bond that they make like. obviously they have their little staring contest and Alec is doing the Lightwood Intensity™ thing but like you can see Magnus frown just slightly and be a little confused because it was so strong right off the bat. even the sound of when they hold hands is louder than when the others do, like you can just feel their connection and the way magnus' magic flows so freely through Alec like god the soulmate energy tbh
Alec has a full body jerk when they hold hands too and he's the only one like damn we get it u 2 r vibin get a room
Izzy going "you ppl are pathetic" straight to the hets is so funny especially after Alec reacted to holding magnus' hand like he had gotten a 1000W electric shock or something. but i get the feel maybe she did that deliberately so they wouldnt pay as much attention to Alec's reaction too
the special effects were truly so bad like we all knew this but damn
Jace is such an asshole like Alec made it to kill the demon because it was you know about to seriously hurt them all and Magnus had just said that he couldn't contain the demon for longer (and like we know that Alec is the only one who ever cared if Magnus overexerted himself out of the shadowhunters but like bro this affects you) and Jace just???? shoved him??????? against the wall???? like a fucking piece of shit??? they should have let valak kill him tbh
the first time magnus calls him Alexander is when he calls Alec to see if he wants a drink and it's just like very clearly a thing that's supposed to be between them two? like he never did it when there were others nearby and i dig that
the fact that when asking Alec out he said "it was nice getting to know you, you seem sympathetic" like he could have gone with a lot of better more flirty adjectives but for a second the truth slipped out and he said what he thought - that while Alec was objectively you know tall and strong and all what really attracted him was the way Alec clearly gave a fuck whether or not Magnus was struggling with his magic to keep the damn demon at bay. and that was before the magic sharing shit too when Alec proved him right by cleaning up his things and saying that he had exerted himself enough for one day. like so many ppl see Magnus as the All Powerful Son Of Asmodeus Who's Also There To Service Shadowhunters and Alec just shows the faintest signs of caring about his wellbeing and he's immediately drawn to him like damn Im sad
also maybe this might be why he asked Alec to come so he could draw from his strength specifically, like he knew from the little hand holding thing that Alec was open and receptive to his magic (which probably adds to the "sympathetic" stuff like the fact that Alec had such an intense reaction to his magic and yet didnt try to push it back or draw away from it basically shows that he's open to Magnus if that makes sense? not only because magic is a part of warlocks but also because shadowhunters are all taught that magic is like, dirty and evil, so it would be instinctive for Alec to be resistant to demonic magic in his body, but he wasn't, he accepted it so readily and intensely it was a shock to the both of them) and also that he cared enough to support him. he kinda had Magnus' back from the beginning, first killing that circle member in the club before Magnus even saw him, then helping Magnus kill the other, then immediately making it to kill the demon when Magnus said he couldn't hold him back for long. like im aware I'm reading too much into this but s1 malec was very kept to the between-the-lines and its very interesting to me to think what Magnus was thinking, even if obviously on a subconscious level. Alec was showing himself to be open, reliable and caring, and magnus values that, and hes attracted to him and he hasnt had that in a while, because he wouldnt allow himself, but now he's healing and the pull he feels when he finally gets that while being emotionally available enough to accept these little gestures of caring is really strong. love that for him tbh
i go FERAL over everything about the magic sharing shit okay i always have. the way alec shows up and Magnus is kind of falling over, exhausted from trying to hold onto luke, and Alec immediately runs to support his weight and make sure hes okay? and magnus even as he was about to fall over never had his magic falter, my man couldn't keep his balance but still wouldnt come close to stumbling and risking luke's life further for even a second. so when Alec gets there he's just quite literally having his back, supporting his weight, when even Magnus didnt care about that (which like. unhealthy) and was focused on luke? and like Magnus can focus on luke because Alec is there to give him his support and make sure he's fine and how long's it been since he last had someone to do that?? and it's clearly alec's first instinct and like we know Jace or even Clary wouldnt fucking react like that. and then they have this ridiculous fucking staring contest again like we get it alec you're gay panicking at Magnus' beautiful eyes but like pls? and then we get to the most important part which is TAKE WHAT YOU NEED
like JDNDJSNSKDNDJDBSHSBSUSNSISNSIBSZJBZUZBSJSBSISNSSINSIS *SCREAMS INTO OBLIVION, SENDING SELF OUT OF EARTH'S GRAVITY ZONE*
his reaction is just SO intense and immediate he's just like "take what you need" he just offers himself fully to help Magnus just like that, no hesitation, and like Magnus is literally drawing from Alec's strength/life force, there should be some kind of resistance, even from a regular person or a friend, like its a very natural instinct. but Alec just grabs his hand and goes take what you need and he doesn't resist he just lets him do it and lets Magnus take his strength, because he genuinely worries about his wellbeing and safety just because he does, he believes in protecting others and being there for them, same as Magnus, and to Alec it's the most natural thing in the world but to Magnus it's shocking because he's always been self reliant, he has to be, he's been alone too many times and he's been used too many times and he's scared of what he'll let people take from him if he opens himself up because he always gives and gives, and he hasnt even let anyone be there for him to have his back and give him support when he needed in these last few centuries, not fully, not since Camille. but Alec shows up and just immediately cares for him in both small (like later when he refuses to let Magnus clean his couch magically because he knows he's tired and does it himself) and huge (like literally not hesitating before letting Magnus use a super intimate and presumably draining spell on him without putting any kind of limit, so Magnus can not overexert himself like he always does) ways and it means so much to him? and hes just so drawn and attracted to him and suddenly he realizes he's catching feelings that he had forgotten how to, because of course he had been healing and opening up, but he still kept people at some kind of length that didnt allow them to take care of him even if they wanted to, but Alec got that opening and he dived right in, and Magnus realizes how starved he's been for this kind of care and support that he's been denying himself and he decides to chase this, take it seriously, and i just aaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
and like again Alec doesn't even think twice about it, because he's always been the protector and the support anyway, and he doesn't want to let anyone struggle and also most of that is just him being a Decent Human Being, but just like he got that opening that no one else did before, he met Magnus at the right time and he was sympathetic and caring and that sparked so much in Magnus, made him realize just how much he's been craving affection and care and close contact with people, and being vulnerable emotionally, and all of that that he's been denying himself. obviously magnus is romantically attracted to him but right then Alec is unlocking honesty with himself inside of magnus, he's unlocking vulnerability and not using it against him but really making a good thing out of it, and magnus' forgotten it could feel like this, safe and nice instead of hurting and scary. and again it's such a simple gesture but fuck my boy's been starved!! for so long!!! okay! and he can't help but want to desperately clutch to that feeling because against all odds he trusts alec to see his vulnerability right then (and he deliberately lets him see it further when he gives Alec that drink, tells him he's been closed off, that alec's unlocked something in him. you can see all the sadness and hope and vulnerability in his eyes right then, pretty much for the first time in the show, hes just so open and vulnerable and that's deliberate! first time was a fluke but second time he's choosing to because he wants to see where this goes, and if the magic sharing scene is the spark, the drinking scene is the fire, because they're not in a life or death situation anymore, Magnus is choosing to give Alec a chance by showing him a glimpse of his insecurities and Alec answers in kind, letting Magnus see his own confusion and want, and also again shows his caring and doesn't betray or use magnus' vulnerability and fuck!!! Magnus falls in love right then because this boy stays with him all night and talks, and he sees Magnus look at him with shiny eyes and admit that he's been scared of relationships, and he tells magnus not to overexert himself, and they click and Alec is open to his magic and hes funny and hes compassionate and also passionate about what he believes in, and they have so much in common with the way they hide and care so deeply and protect others always and are so loyal and i just. udndjdndidjdjxnxjxnskxndk SOULMATES god)
I need to lie down actually this was a bad idea I'm not strong enough I'm too feral
Might continue this later who knows. I'll be tagging malec livewatch and also long post as always if you want to filter this nonsense out
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csykora · 4 years
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[A tabby cat curled up in the middle of a bubble hockey board. Or you, being comfortable in an athletic community that’s good enough for you]
Hiiiiii! I’ve been looking at ice hockey and it seems a cool sport and something that I might want to do as a hobby. Only Im disabled. Do you think I could still do the thing? Do you have ideas on how to start doing the thing? Ive often found it hard to do sports because coaches or trainers don’t know shit about disability and so have no clue how to teach you things or what you may or may not be capable of and telling them is useless because they make assumptions about your body and gah. Cheers
Hey—
Yes. Do the thing. Please go do it! I am not your coach, not your trainer, only friendly local bone witch—which I am very annoyed to have to say because you are a great athlete to work with.
Can I point out a couple things you just said?
You’re offering to do a trainer’s homework for them.
The early game didn’t have coaches. People milled on and off in whatever situations they felt like. Coaches and trainers came onto the scene so that someone was keeping track of who was actually good at what, when they needed support, and how to use them to best effect. That’s their whole gig.
Talking to folks on this blog, I’ve learned lots of people have this impression that capital-A Athletes have some factory-settings-standard body, any deviation a disaster (and they themselves can’t be athletes because they don’t.)
I think it’s very useful to smash this idea. Every athlete is a grab bag of weaknesses and weirdnesses, from old injuries down to handedness. Every coach longs to have three right-shot defensemen, and has made peace with the fact they’re not going to get them. Their job is to play with all the mismatched pieces they do have until they fit into a team.
If you present a coach or trainer with information about your abilities, and they don’t want to use that information, the problem you got right there is a shit coach.
Despite what the National League believes, there are more than 32 coaches in the world. 
Throw a stick up here and you’ll hit another amateur coach. When we’re little, if we get a shit coach or PE teacher, we get stuck. That does real and lasting harm, which I am happy to go on at length about, but to flip it around:
Now, you are a big Zee, who wants to learn to play as a hobby, with the goal of having fun. That’s a powerful place to be.
I won’t say there aren’t stakes: you could get hurt, physically or emotionally. Sharing information about your body with other people to try to keep yourself from getting hurt all the time can be hard. Playing can make you feel physically accomplished and capable in your body, which is a deep need I think we all have, so having to back away if a team does turn out to be shit is hard. So I don’t say “you can always quit a team” lightly, but…there is no threat if you quit a shit team, no one (who matters) will get mad or make you go back.That means you can advocate for yourself, and if a reasonable shot at advocacy reveals that a coach isn’t just unfamiliar with how to do their job for someone with your disability but uninterested in doing their damn job for a disabled person, you can wave them farewell and find another.
Now, our goal is for you to find a good trainer, who just needs to be given information about what you (not someone with the ‘same’ condition, but you specifically) have got going on.
I’m going to tell you to look up an adult learn-to-skate program. Most rinks will have regular learn-to-skate and learn-to-hockey programs spaced throughout the year (often paired so you spend “first semester” on skating before the people who want to move up to hockey). Look up different rinks, talk to people about the rink culture and the coaches there. If you have the time, maybe spend a while hanging out there watching the open skates, local team practices or public classes, getting a sense what it’s like and telling yourself you have as much right to be in that barn as anyone else. Then sign up for a class. But first I want you to be devastatingly, Hepburn-ishly confident in talking about what your disability means for you.
From the information you’ve just given me, I don’t know almost anything I would need to work with you. You may or may not know that information about yourself already, but you can figure it out.
“Mild hemiplegia” is not a super-medical phrase. Hemiplegia is complete paralysis on one side of the body, where you are unable to move those muscles on purpose. A mild to moderate loss of muscle strength on one side is hemiparesis.
These terms are, to be honest, mostly used to organize medical literature. They describe very specific signs that might happen for a variety of reasons. Other symptoms like loss of sensation, loss of range of motion, involuntary muscle spasms, or loss/delay of involuntary motion (reflexes), which may or may not occur with plegia/paresis, have to be specified and described. If I were treating you I definitely wouldn’t describe your case as “hemiplegia”, I would call it “hemiparesis” with a lot more descriptive words around that (and I probably wouldn’t use either when talking to you).
It’s not that you used a word wrong. I’m concerned that 1. people have made you think you have to use A Medical Name for your disability for it to be taken seriously, but also 2. because the stroke happened so early, you’ve actually been denied care and opportunities to learn about it.
1. First, for the record, you don’t have to justify your disabled identity to me. And while I really (really) understand the self-protective urge a lot of us have to try to say, “my condition is really real and serious, it has a Real Medical Name, please believe me”, I think that (outside of a legal context where you’re seeking protected accommodations) that strategy often isn’t as useful as we hope it will be to communicate with other people in our daily lives. The people who demand to see your Really Medically Serious card before making accommodations will always find something else to demand, while people who aren’t trying to be assholes will be better able to help you if they know exactly, practically how.
It’s not that one way of talking about your disability is wrong, but I want you to talk about it in ways that are useful to you, that help you connect with other people and get you what you want.
2. I’ve worked with a lot of elders who have paralysis or hemiparesis from strokes later in life, after being able-bodied for most of their lives, and doctors and therapists jump right up in there teaching and training them to “recover” that “lost function”. They/their families can’t not know all the medical words just from hearing them over and over. But what often happens when a person is disabled since childhood is that…they aren’t seen as having “lost capacity” that can be “saved”, but as having a baseline “low level of function” that’ll never change, so much less attention is payed.
I’m using the air quotes because many people’s disabilities are present throughout their whole lives, and someone’s disability or disabled identity is not just a “problem” to be solved or gotten rid of. But people with disabilities grow and change, especially when we’re, you know, children. What often happens is that parents/authorities encourage able-bodied children to play, practicing motions and building up their bodies’ ability to move, while children with disabilities get benched from practice, benched from not just one activity but from being active at all, which means being benched from developing their bodies in the ways that might actually work for them, and from developing relationships with their bodies.
Proprioception, for example, is a combination of some fundamental ability/capacity/threshold/potential/whathaveyou and skill developed through experience that changes in context. Ever seen a baby? None of them know where the hell they are. A baby that can crawl is let loose to explore the world and bump into things that trigger their nerves until their body learns to fit all that sensation information together and use it. A baby that doesn’t crawl for some other reason often doesn’t get a chance to explore, to experience those sensations or train up that skill. And a kid that has a different threshold for stimulation, who naturally seeks out more or less or a different sort, is often stopped from stimming in ways which would provide their body information they could process.
As an adult, you get the chance to look at what you want to do and how your body can do it again.
So…
I want you to go throw a ball at a wall. Try to catch it. If you do any exercises already, sit-ups or pushups, do some of those. Run around the block, jump around on your bed. Stretch or just swing your arms and legs around. Find some small objects to use as weights and lift them, with either arm and then either leg (or set them on the floor and see if you can push them).
Work your way up your body one limb at a time, first thinking just about that limb on its own and then comparing the two sides after you’ve done them both. Don’t put a value judgement on anything yet, just pay attention: if your feet feel okay after running around, if you had more strength in one spot than you expected, if you had fun jumping, if there was a time you thought you might wobble but were able to correct, count that too! Think about each activity you did, the sensations around it, and whether that stim was satisfying, overstimulating, or not stimulating enough.
I want you to be able to go to a learn-to-play program, ask to talk with the coach at an appropriate time during the application or orientation, and say things like, “I have this condition. This is what it means: I have less strength with one arm, but I can move it as fast as the other, and with the same range of motion. I don’t grip items as well with one hand, or I tend to grip very hard. I don’t feel this type of sensation in this area, but I do feel that”.
Your coach is then going to recommend exercises to build strength in particular areas, or modifications to exercises so that you can do them without needing to use a particular area; they might have you try different equipment (find a tape job or adapted hand position that helps you keep hold of your stick, etc), and they may also encourage your towards and start training you for a particular position where you could do the most. When it comes to sensation, they’ll know to watch you closer for injuries in that spot that you might not notice.
This came in while I was applying to go back to university, and I bribed myself through the short essay section by pausing every hour to eat chocolate and sketch out what I would have you do for hypothetical positions and exercise plans. That’s still a long way off, but I’m very invested, so a couple things I want you to think about as you work towards the goal:
Keep sled hockey in mind. It’s not always a fit for people whose disability involves their arms, but it’s a cool community and most rinks will offer clinics where you can try out a sled and get a sense of the game.
How do you feel about getting hit with a puck? From your description, stickhandling and shooting may not be super fun for you. They may be, but if you give them a fair try and start to fee discouraged, try picturing yourself as a defender focussing on positioning or shot-blocking, or a goalie. Some people never ever want to do it, which is fair, but if you’re at all interested I’d love to see you try some time in goal! Everyone’s different but some folks the weight of the pads and the focused role can be really good stimulation. If your handling or footwork doesn’t feel great, goaltending would let you focus on moving your body more naturalistically as a whole to position in front of shots. And everyone else will love you for volunteering!
Write back and tell us how it goes!
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jimlingss · 4 years
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pt.2 of yesterday
I don’t want to flood people’s dashes, so hopefully answering your messages here will suffice!
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anonymous asked: Hi! I wanted to tell you how much I love your work and how you make me enjoy every Monday thanks to your regular updates ! I saw a previous anon telling you how your writings lacks of emotion and I totally disagree with them... obviously everybody won’t like it but your stories just DON’T lack of love or emotion this is madness I want to thank you for publishing your amazing stories freely here for everyone to read. (Sorry if my English is weird I’m french ejfjekfjd)
“this is madness” LOL
You’re hilarious, anon. And your english is perfectly fine!!!
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anonymous asked: Hello! Im the culinary student anon who sent you an ask a while ago and i saw you received an ask about the lack of emotion from your stories. I read kitchen romance and i actually really really like it and don’t quite understand how it lacks in emotions as I interpreted the stories more like the beginning of the oc and jin’s love story and they are only starting to open up to each other so i guess thats why anon might feel like it lacks romantic vibe from both of the characters. (1)
Anonymous said: Just want to tell you that you’re one of the best writer and ive been following you for 2/3 years now, you never failed to amaze me with your writings!! All your stories are so well written that i sometimes wonder how do you come up with such an amazing plot every single time and your stories are always nice to re-read and the effort you pour into creating your stories is also admirable (2)
while i was reading kitchen romance and ive only started s&c (currently on chapter 4) i can say that its pretty similar with how it is irl (and the part where we find out jk is an iu fans reminded me of my ex-crush whose also a culinary student, i would like to tell you a story about it but ill just waste your time lol) , just want to send you a few encouragement and love for you and your writings *sending virtual hugs* (3) -👩🏻‍🍳anon
You’re too kind, thank you (and also, welcome back!). I’ll be frank, there was a hot second I was considering taking down Kitchen Romance but I didn’t cause I don’t want my efforts of editing it to go to waste asdfghjkl. I can’t believe you’ve been sticking around me for so long :’) it’s always nice to know some folks stay. Anyway, I’m glad that Sugar and Coffee is pretty similar to how it works irl since I tried my best to do research. I definitely love a good storytime as well so don’t worry about wasting my time :>
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Anonymous said: a good majority of your fics display an unfathomable amount of DEPTH. regarding character development. plot. even the shortest lines of dialogue reveal so much more to the character and unveil their true emotions. i personally think the more REALISTIC side of love may be perceived as 'bland.' ‘emotionless.’ whatever you want to call it. nothing’s wrong with portraying a relationship that isn’t overboard with a whole lot of tooth aching fluff or lowkey annoying pda. +1
Anonymous said: there’s nothing wrong with taking out a bit of emotion to fit the PERSONALITIES of the characters. some people out there don’t necessarily feel a lot of emotions. so it’s honestly not really a mistake if a story lacks it (unless it was unintentional). subtlety is an art that is hard to master, but you’ve done it! and to respond to the anon, sometimes, if you skim through a fic without reading every word the author intended for you to read, +2
Anonymous said: then it’s quite common to not feel the full extent of the emotions you were supposed to feel. just a thought but no hate. we’re all entitled to our opinions. but besides that, kina, you write on a vast scale ranging from hardcore angst to diabetes-inducing fluff. and you do it beautifully. sure there are some stories that are better than others, but i believe a LOT of it comes down to personal preference and taste. +3
Anonymous said: even if you are feeling creatively limited, you work hard to continue writing for your readers, and your determination and diligence wILL NOT GO UNNOTICED. i just want you to know that you write amazingly. your syntax is practically immaculate, your characters feel real… the endings of your stories always wrap something up and the strings are tied—even if it isn’t necessarily a happy ending. you can convey hundreds of different characters through WORDS. +4
Anonymous said: i’ll have you know that it’s hard to write. it’s even harder to write about people who aren’t YOU. so as someone who looks up to you a lot, i want to commend you for your writing. some of your fics that i read on a monthly basis: tears of a villain, a piece of the moonlight, head over heels to hell, ghost in the machine, a mark of betrayal, a kiss of poison, until yesterday, the truth between us and arcadia. +5
Anonymous said: to be fair, there were way more fics but i didn’t want to make this message any longer than it already is LOL. i find these pieces wonderful. heart wrenching. and SO DAMN EMOTIONAL IT PLAGUES MY MIND FOR DAYS. also you’re literally one of the few fucking people who can use the em dash correctly. thank you so much for sharing your talent with us! +6
Oh my goodness. I don’t even know what to say, anon. This is a whole damn thesis and it’s about my fics :’> You know, it’s easy to brush off fanfiction as a ‘whatever’ thing and indeed, it isn’t that big of a deal compared to some things in the world. But I really do take all my stories seriously and put forth a lot of effort - so to see it recognized and appreciated it makes me beyond happy. It’s good to know that my efforts haven’t gone to waste at all and that there are people out there who will support me no matter the endeavours I take. Thank you so much. You don’t know how much this means to me.
((Also, honestly I picked up the em dash usage after I wrote The Truth Between Us with gukyi who used it. I’m pretty sure I’m not using it right but to hear that I am, god damn that’s a breath of relief right there))
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backtobleuside submitted: Are you kidding me!? Your stories don’t lack love at all. They’re the kind of fics that you read, soak it all in and then come back for more. I’ve cried so much when I read Beyond reach, Boo-lieve in me, A piece of the moonlight, His name, Tell me lies etc. etc, and also laughed and felt the emotions of not just the OC, but also the other characters. Kitchen Romance was also so fluffy and sweet and personally, I don’t think that anything needs to be added to it. Anyway, your fics do not lack emotion—you’re probably the first author I send a message to because your stories impacted me a lot and left a strong impression on me. I even imagine your characters as real people who have real lives that continue on even after the story is done.
asdfghjkl thank you :’) I see you every week and sometimes several times at that. I really appreciate your consistent feedback and following. You never fail to send me a message too which I appreciate a lot. I’m glad you’re enjoying everything I’m producing!!
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youngfleurever said: Would just like to say that your fics do in fact make me violently sob to the boy where my eyes are so swollen I have trouble opening them the next day and I wake up feeling like there’s sawdust in my mouth because I’m dehydrated.
oh my god. please keep yourself hydrated hahahahhaha more importantly, how do you know what sawdust in your mouth is like. WHAT have you been doing LOL
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Anonymous said: I’ve felt emotions that I’ve never felt before when I read your fics.... so as a person that has read your entire masterlist, I DO NOT think that your fics lack emotion.... I hope you don’t feel disheartened because you’re one of my favourite writers, not just on tumblr but like, evER 💓💓💓💓💓💓
Please, even if I was disheartened, the overwhelming amount of feedback and praise has completely overridden it :’)
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joonie-mono said: when tumblr deletes the first part of your ask 🙄😌✌️
LOOOOOOOL
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haylo4ever said: Sorry had to add my 10 cents. You're such a talented writer,,, I WISH I could write a smol smol 1/1000000000 that you write,,, like I remember when I followed you bc I was in awe of your writing.... I mean?? Sure maybe not every fic hits it with someone but it's just ridic to name drop (a friend nonetheless) when you're all extremely talented writers.
Trust me, writing comes with practice!! I should honestly just tattoo that on me. God knows my first fanfic was absolutely GARBAGE. I didn’t know pacing, didn’t know that I should separate chunks of paragraphs, how to write dialogue or describe scenes properly. I went in blind. Even my second, third and fourth fanfic was garbage. You could definitely get to “my level” or even far surpass it with enough dedication and practice. I mean I’ve been writing for four years, so thank GOD there’s been improvement. I wouldn’t be natural if there wasn’t. But clearly the more you practice, the better you improve! That applies to anything.
The me in ten years will certainly be better now.
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Anonymous said: Hi kina! I’m here in support of kitchen romance! I actually didn’t feel like it was missing a ton of fluffy moments (and I say that as a huGE LOVER OF FLUFF) but the story was just as entertaining in the whole chase of them getting closer to each other! It’s honestly one of my favorite one shots I’ve read lately and I’m not saying that lightly! Also, that anon that said your work lacks emotion has probably not read like half of your masterlist bc oO MAN QUEEN OF MAKING ME CRY- black heart anon🖤
Thank you :’]
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Anonymous said: Ok I’m very offended wow the audacity!Specially coming for my baby kitchen romance like that story made me feel so much and it’s only one of the many fics you have written kina like I’m literally baffled like dynasty has made me cry scream happy and hot all at the same time and I was literally just thinking about it that whole weekend and this anon has the nerve to say your stories lack emotions?When you are literally the queen of show casing all types of emotions in your stories!You did it all
Anonymous said: Also 😭😭😭😂😂😩hoooooooow and whereeee did they see any lack of love and emotions like have you read jungle park???? Inside my mind??? FREAKING SUGAR AND COFFEE (like this fic is made with love and I- ) Actually you know what , just read the whole masterlist😩😩💗💗💗
LOL tbh I didn’t expect Dynasty to receive the love it has. I was actually kind of wary when posting it cause it’s kind of Wild. 
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bangtans-peaceful-piegon said: just gotta say u handled that whole anon thing so well which not only makes me admire u as a writer but even more as a person :] (i mean i knew u were gr8 before the whole deal but yeah love ya 💛)
tbh, I’m not sure how well I handled it cause I was flooded with over 30 messages afterwards (evidently) ;_; which I love and appreciate but I’m not really as hurt as some people think hahaha criticism should be received well but it’s still hard not to take personally tbh. It’s gonna have to be something I work on or perhaps it’ll be one of those things that I’ll take better with age.
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fucktheroyals · 4 years
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IS EVER----- WHY. DO THEY CHANGE. TUMBLR. EVERY. FUCKING. WEEK UUUUUUUUUUUGH HOLY SHIT.
Anyway.... Is everyone ready to hear about me and the guy from my work (who's an asshole, see someone of my recent posts) flirting? (this is super long for what happened) (aka another story of he talks and become stupid as hell)
He's so CUTE. WHEN I GOT TO THEN END I COULDNT STOP SMILING UUUUUUUGH
One, about him being an asshole I decided I dont really care about something no ones going to believe and my brother's friend (who heard about what he said) said it was probably an excuse for ignoring me and honestly... If I was him I might be an idiot and an asshole reponding to that question too because my brain would be like "I CANT LET PEOPLE KNOW ITS CAUSE IM CRUSHING ON HIM" and yeah. So I really don't care and don't wanna know if he did it on purpose so we'll leave it for now and I'll enjoy the flirting. Also I think I made the point that I saw him Saturday, most likely after he said this, and he was avoiding me till I asked him what to do then he started joking and got a little flirty. I can't help easily getting over it, he's really cute. I feel guilty about it. moving on.
Ha he was in charge again today and everyone joking and I was giggling because they say the absolute worst shit and I caught him looking at me for .2 seconds. Later when I asked him if he wanted me to do my usual (Clean the bathrooms) he said yes and he said 'spray that shit down' and did little finger guns in reference to what he did a few weeks ago. HE'S SO CUTE 😭.
Then he came up with something for me to do after that different than my usual and I was kinda surprised he wanted me to do it considering stupid shit he told my dad once (he was saying I was the one that did ‐ an aspect of what he's asking me to do - super wrong when I didnt!). I find it funny he comes up with something for me to do but at least it shows he's thinking more than our manager hhhhhhh (I really dont like the manager but I know he can't remember shit so whatever).
(I work on a g×lf c0urse & he wanted me to go fix the locations of where the t3es (in g×lf this is where you put the ball down to start a hole. a t3e box is where the tees are put and is USUALLY indicated by shorter grass.) were because the spots they were at "looked like shit"/were a mess. They were. I want you to know someone is supposed to be doing this job in the morning which means he shouldn't have needed to send someone out to fix them. So when I saw how fucked up some of them were I was very annoyed, like these fool asses don't listen its not rocket science!!!!!)
So I went and did that super correctly! As correctly as possible! Yes, because I like him and wanna make sure he knows I know shit but also might as well, I gotta kill two hours. And I want to impress him. And I'm away from him, I can't impress him when he's infront of my my brain becomes hella dumb. Case and point THIS NEXT PART.
🙄 So I do it all correctly but I forgot to do 10 because I went from 9 to 1 (yes backwards) and then was thinking of going from 1 straight to 18 (to do 18 to 10) and didnt think about how 10 is right next to one. So I was like k. Gonna go back. Gonna go back. So I did 12 correctly and then I went to 11 and the problem? 🙃 11 is right infront ouf our building, not like directly like 10 feet but a good 50ish feet and you can see 11 from our building but theres a whole bunch of fence and trees and bushes to slightly obscure it. I'm painting a picture for you but the point is ITS RIGHT THERE. My anxiety is so bad doing things on that t3e box I hate it.
So im walking up the little slope to the box thinking (this flag is forward the t3s needa go back) and the asshole is talking to another coworker in front of the building apparently and he just fucking YELLS something along the lines of "GREAT JOB YOU'RE DOING GREAT!" I barely heard it tho I had a headphone is so i yelled back "WHAT?!" and this is where I COMPLETELY FORGOT WHERE TO PUT THE T3ES AND STARTED PLACING THEM IN THE FRONT OF THE DAMN BOX. And then he yelled again "YOU'RE DOING GREAT! (something about doing it good) GREAT LOCATIONS!" And then I started hurrying and COMPLETELY THREW 10 TO THE WIND. Aka "forgot it" BECAUSE I AM NOT GOING TO NOT SAY/DO ANYTHING WHEN HE'S YELLING NICE THINGS ON A GOLF COURSE TO FUCK WITH ME! I NEEDED TO SASS HIM!
And here we saw my priorities: having fun talking to him.
So i drove around the fence and to there and he was talking to his friend and I grab the crap that needs to be put away and he looks at me, and I look at him and then I'm like "What do you want?!" but with a smile, he's dumb!!!! ugh. And he smiled and banged his cart and was like scoffed and then he told me good job, go home. WILL HE EVER SAY SOMETHING THATS NOT THAT PLEEEEASE. And then as I was walking away he told me I did good job again and another compliment along that line? And I thanked him~ 😊 He's cute 😤
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