#if it didn’t just kick me out after answering the same questions a million times
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Fkn surveys have made me so angry today
#if it didn’t just kick me out after answering the same questions a million times#I would get well over halfway through and it just wouldn’t load or something#or I’d finish it and not get the reward#only just managed to finish one for my fkn daily bullshit#tears of the kingdom had better be amazing I stg
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Baby Steps
[Chapter 3] Doctor's Appointment
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Pairing: Satoru Gojo x f!Reader
Almost a week passes after the meetup, and Satoru hears nothing from you. You exchanged numbers, and that was it. Satoru hoped that you’d contact him first because he feels like he’d be pushy and he doesn’t want that.
For the first time in his life, Satoru is worried about being perceived as pushy. But that isn’t the only thought in his mind, luckily. Or perhaps unluckily because the man is freaking out. He has a million other things on his mind.
He stepped up, told you that he’d be by your side no matter what. Truthfully, he isn’t ready to be a father, but he doubts you’re ready to be a mother either. The man is just worried… What if you choose to give the baby to him? How will an irresponsible adult like Satoru take care of a baby? He doesn’t even know the basics.
Maybe he shouldn’t have suggested that, but at the same time he can’t have complete strangers raising a Gojo. Maybe he can give the baby to his clan, and that’s that. But no, he’s not going to allow them to raise his baby.
The man hopes that you’ll choose to raise the baby as well because he doubts he’ll do it properly if he does it alone. He needs someone there with him, reassuring him that he’s doing it well.
Satoru lays down on his bed and looks at the ceiling, taking in every detail about it. He’s never looked up at the ceiling of his room, he’s too busy to do so. Each night that he lays on his bed, he doesn’t have any trouble sleeping. He closes his eyes and immediately falls asleep, but this week it has been different. He’s been thinking about his irresponsibility, and about his new life. No matter what you decide to do, this completely changes everything.
He never pictured himself as a father before… And now at night he worries about what kind of father he’ll be.
His phone rings, and he’s quick to grab it from the nightstand. Your name is displayed on the screen causing this sudden worry to wash over him. He picks up the phone and brings it up to his ear.
“Hey…” You speak. You sound calm, which eases the man a bit. But he still waits anxiously for you to tell him what’s up. You hear his breathing on the phone so you know he’s there. “Are you free tomorrow?”
“Uh… I do have to work, but I can make time. What’s up?” He questions. He swears his heart is about to beat out of his chest. Why is he suddenly so nervous?
“I have an ultrasound tomorrow at ten… Do you want to come? I forgot to tell you earlier, sorry. I’ve been busy with exams.” You inform him.
“It’s fine. I can make it.” He responds. “Can I pick you up?”
“Pick me up? Uh… Sure. I’ll send you the address.” You hang up the phone, and Satoru lets out a breath that he didn’t know he was holding. He lays back down on the bed and closes his eyes, thinking about tomorrow. He’s beyond nervous, but he’s finally able to fall asleep.
-
There’s a knock on your door and you quickly get up. You open the door and find Satoru. He wears a black jacket with a white shirt underneath, jeans, and his usual sunglasses. You give him a weak smile, and he smiles back.
“How are you?” He asks as you step out. He looks over your outfit, a long yellow dress and an oversized nude jacket.
“I’ve been better. Morning sickness is kicking my ass.” You confess, as you lock the door. Once the door is locked, you both begin to walk. Satoru bites his bottom lip, unsure of how to respond.
“I’m sorry.” His voice comes out as low. You can barely hear it. You don’t say anything in response. You walk in silence till you get to the parking lot, “Do you want something to eat before the appointment?”
“I already ate, thank you though.” You answer. You follow him to the black car, and the man opens the passenger door for you. You get in, and take notice of the luxurious car. You won’t have to worry about making ends meet for your baby.
He gets in the driver’s seat and quickly starts the car. He checks to see if your seatbelt is on before taking off. He puts on some music because he doesn’t want the awkward silence to fill up the car till you get there. He doubts you’re going to say much, and he’s right.
You don’t say anything. He has so many questions about how you’ve been and if the baby has caused you any problems. And the question that’s on his mind that won’t leave, something he’s dying to know: what are you going to do?
You get to the place and he luckily finds parking near the entrance. You walk into the clinic, and he follows behind. You check in, and are given some papers to fill out. Once it’s filled out, you wait patiently for your name to be called.
You and Satoru sit quietly next to each other, and you’re both silent. He watches as you bounce your leg, looking around, which gives away your nervousness. Your eyes look around, wondering if anyone is in your same situation, but you doubt it. Some are here just for general checkups, most likely nothing to do with pregnancy.
The other pregnant woman in the room is with who seems to be her husband. At least they look very excited and happy to be here with one another. Satoru stares at you, worried. He doesn’t know how to distract you.
He doesn’t know why, but he grabs your head, which makes you look at him. You give him a weak smile. Your cheeks slowly get warm. You’re about to talk to him, but as you open your mouth to speak, your name is called.
You both stand up and follow the nurse. She makes some small talk and when you get to the room, she gives you a minute to change into the hospital gown. Satoru sits in the corner, and he looks away as you take off your clothes. You take a seat on the exam chair.
“You can look now.” You inform Satoru, which makes him look back at you.
“I thought you would just have to lift up your dress during an ultrasound.” He shares. You chuckle in response, but he can clearly tell it’s because of your nerves.
“Well it’s the first ultrasound and it’s so early on, so it’s not an abdominal one.” You tell him.
“So how-” He begins but he quickly catches on. His cheeks turn pink thinking about it, as if he hadn’t gotten you pregnant. There’s a knock on the door.
“Come in!” You yell. The technician joins you, a smile on her face as she introduces herself. She begins everything, and Satoru watches in amazement, while you just look up at the ceiling because this is beyond awkward.
Satoru looks at the screen, waiting to see his baby on the screen. And then he finally sees something. It’s miniscule, but it’s his baby. You look at the screen as well, not as amazed as Satoru but pretty surprised as well.
“Can we listen to a heartbeat?” You ask. And you swear your breath is taken away as you hear the sound of your baby’s heartbeat. Satoru is shocked. It’s as if he’s fallen in love, and as he hears that, any worries are gone. And he genuinely hopes that you’ll keep the baby.
He doesn’t understand why this changes anything, something as simple as a heartbeat takes all his worries away.
The technician finishes up, and she exits the room. This confirms everything. You’re having a baby and you couldn’t be more worried. But you aren’t just worried, it’s mixed with another feeling, one that you can’t quite put your finger on.
“So have you decided what you’re going to do? Are you terminating the pregnancy?” Satoru questions. He can’t think of a better time to ask this. He wants to know if he can get excited with reason.
“I-” You begin, and your throat goes dry. You look at the man as he takes off the sunglasses. “I’m keeping the baby. You said you can afford it, and that was the main reason I thought of terminating the pregnancy.”
“So we’re becoming parents…” He’s in disbelief, and your breath gets caught up in your throat, thinking that this isn’t what he wants. But you see a smile forming on his face, and it takes your worries away.
There’s a knock on the door, and the doctor joins you. She’s ready to tell you about everything.
-
“So you’re seven weeks along.” Satoru repeats once you’re in his car. It’s fair to say he’s so shocked by everything. But yet his voice is filled with this happiness. “And we’re having a single baby.”
“Thankfully.” You tell him with a laugh. “I couldn’t imagine being so unlucky to end up with twins in my first pregnancy.”
“Twins would’ve been fun.” He responds, and you click your tongue.
“Not as first time parents. Especially with an unplanned pregnancy.” You reply. He wasn’t really thinking about it that way.
Now he thinks about all the things that have to be bought and all the arrangements for a single baby. And how he has to tell his family about his child– He doesn’t have to tell his family.
“Do you live in a one bedroom apartment?” He questions and you hum in response. “We have to get you a two bedroom.”
“Well, the baby is going to sleep in my room for at least their first year of life.” You tell him.
“Okay… But I want to be as close to you and my baby.” He responds, which catches you off guard. That wasn’t something you really were thinking about. The man clears his throat before speaking again, “I guess that’s too soon, no? Maybe in some time.”
“Yeah… I guess. But I guess I could look for a bigger apartment.” You say.
“I’ll pay for it, obviously.” He replies. “We also have to start buying clothes, diapers, a crib, a stroller, bottles… There’s so much, and I haven’t even listed half the things.”
“Luckily enough we have so much time.” You remind him, so the man won’t worry too much about it. Satoru grabs his wallet and looks at the ultrasound picture that he asked the doctor for. He smiles as he shows you the picture, as if you don’t have one as well.
“Hopefully that time passes fast so we can see our little nugget.” He tells you, and you can’t help but smile as you hear him. You never imagined that he’d be so excited over this.
“I’m happy to see you’re so excited for the baby.” You say, watching as the man grins, his finger tracing over the baby which looks like a tiny bean on the picture.
The man has always thought he’d end up alone, but the picture he holds in his hand proves otherwise. It’s so crazy for him to think that in a couple of months, he’ll be a father. He isn’t ready, but he sure is excited.
“We also have to buy maternity clothes for you.” He informs you, and you shake your head.
“Maternity clothes are ugly.” You say, and he raises his eyebrow. “”I’ll work with what I have.”
“Oh? If that’s what you want.” He doesn’t care to argue. He doubts your current clothes will fit once your belly grows, but he won’t argue with a stranger. A stranger that carries his baby. He won’t let an argument ruin his very wonderful day.
After all, he’s going to be a father.
🏷 @mykyoon @sunjayist @fonkymonkeyfriday @lilith412426 @luvs-wrld @witchymermaid12 @fi106 @whosveenus @distractionforyourthoughts @dearsunaa @tamak00 @watyousayin @leiriswhore @q-the-rockaholic @shuxjodie @syynnaaah @kleeboomed @shrekmwa @bakugobiddies @blueeskies17 @arminsgfloll @obeythemasters @crispmarshmallow @levismainbabe
#jujutsu kaisen#anime#jjk#jjk gojo#gojo x you#gojo x reader#gojo satoru#gojou satoru x reader#jujutsu gojo#jjk fanfic#jujutsu kaisen gojo#gojo fanfic
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ooh, I loved the worst. Would you consider continuing it? Maybe Jack tries to win the reader back and she slowly falls back in love or something.
The Worst pt 2
Jack Harlow x reader
Angst/fluff
A/n: enjoy!!🫶🏽
Synopsis: Jack realizes he needs Y/n.
******************************
Every day without you felt longer and longer. Jack attempted to get over you, well thought about it. Word has gotten around that he’s been with girl after girl, but that’s only partly true. He’d try to get over you through them. He’d take ‘em on expensive dates and do things he wished he could do with you, with them. But it wasn’t the same. He’d sleep with them, sure, but half the time he’d have to fake any pleasure they thought they were providing. He’d kick them out immediately, not wanting to deal with them any longer. Minute after minute though, it was all becoming too much. Not having you with him, hit harder than anything he’s ever had to go through. Sure, he’s angry at you. You left him and he didn’t even get to hear your voice tell him goodbye. He didn’t get to look into your eyes while you said the words, just so he could beg you to stay. He didn’t get to tell you how much he loves you, how much he needs you. The fame and money are only fun when you’re there with him.
His apartment never felt this empty before, the whole thing just feels too lonely without you in it. Your music constantly playing, that he used to get on you about. The way you’d sing and dance as you do house chores. The way you’d leave little bits of your personality everywhere, finding different knick knacks everywhere.
“Fuck.” Jack sighs.
He pulls out his phone and scrolls through your Instagram. A lot of your friends were the Instagram type, and have thousands of posts and millions of followers. Nearly their whole life is shown on their page. You’d always scold them on how not everything had to be through social media, and that was Jack’s favorite thing about you. You loved your privacy. You’d always tell him that the purest things only become corrupt when others know about it. But now, he watches as it looks like you’ve been out clubbing day after day. Each post shows you wearing seemingly less and less clothes and more and more makeup. You’re starting to look like your friends. Jack taps your glowing profile to view your story. He smiles as his song plays in the background and you scream his lyrics. Always his biggest fan. His smile quickly fades as he sees a guy wrap his arms around you in the video and smile at the camera.
“Who the fuck is that?” Jack yells to himself.
A big rule when the two of you were dating was having each other’s location on. Now, it wasn’t for any toxic reason, just because y’all travel so much and wanted to make sure each other was safe, this time might be different though.
Jack grabs his keys and quickly makes it to his Jeep, driving to some house that was definitely not yours.
He taps the steering wheel a couple of times eagerly looking for the house 4017 he repeats in his head. He finally finds it and parks the car quickly, leaving the car on.
He walks up to the door and knocks harshly. After a few minutes and a couple more hard knocks, a man answers the door.
“Where the fuck is she?” Jack says to the man sternly.
“Chill, man. She didn’t tell me she had a boyfriend.” He yawns.
You stumble out of his bedroom with your heels barely on and your hair disheveled.
“Jack?” You question, still heavily hungover.
“Come on, y/n,” Jack says sternly.
“What the fuck are you talking about? Come on?” You ask him, furrowing your eyebrows.
“You didn’t say you had a boyfriend.” The guy says.
“I don’t.”
“Come on, y/n. I’m not going to ask you again.” Jack orders.
“Just like how I didn’t ask you to come here?” You ask him, crossing your arms over your chest.
Jack nods, tongue against his cheek tightly before he storms into the house and throws you over his shoulder.
“Put me down!”
“Why do you have to be so challenging, Hmm?” He shakes his head, opening the passenger door.
“I gave you your time, I even had my time. But you never came around. Why? Was it me?” He asks you.
“Jack, I’m too hungover for this shit.” You sigh.
“Shit? Us talking about our relationship is shit?” He yells.
“NO, YOU FUCKING YELLING IS THE SHIT! SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR A SECOND!” You yell at him.
Surprised by your outburst, Jack rearranges in the driver’s seat and sighs.
“Why did you leave?” He asks quietly.
“Cause I couldn’t deal with it anymore.”
“Deal with what? You never talked to me about it so I don’t know what was happening.”
“Your career, your fans, the fast life, it was all too much. Then, you were barely there. I mean we were together, but you weren’t there.” You admit.
“Why didn’t you just tell me?”
“Because when we first started dating I asked you what would be the biggest reason you’d break up with a girl, and you said she didn’t support your career. It wasn’t that I didn’t support your career anymore, I just felt lonely, but I didn’t know how you’d take it. So, I broke up with you before you broke up with me.” You shrug, playing with your thumbs.
“Y/n, baby. I promise you, I wouldn’t have broken up with you.” He says, holding you hard.
“How was I supposed to know, Jack.” You say, tearing up and looking at him.
“You wrote all these songs about having other girls, you’re always around so many pretty girls, and I just. I don’t compare to what you could have.” You tell him, tears falling down your cheeks.
Jack pulls into a random parking lot and parks the car.
“Y/n, I don’t care about any other girls, and I certainly didn’t have any other girls on the side. You’re the one I love. If you needed me I would’ve been there.” Jack says, cupping your cheek, and wiping the tears away.
You just look at him, tears falling.
“Y/n, take me back. Let me try again.” Jack pleads.
“I don’t want to hold you back.” You sniffle.
“Baby, I don’t give a fuck about anything that doesn’t include you. Forget my job, don’t even think about it. Think about me and what we could have. Please.” Jack begs.
You cup his cheek like you did that night at the Halloween party. For a second Jack thinks it’ll be the same, that you’ll tell him that y’all aren’t meant to be.
You look up into his eyes, the eyes you’ve missed for months. You literally have all that you’ve wanted in your hands and it’s begging for you to take him back, but instead, you settle back into your seat.
“Take me home, please.” You say barely above a whisper.
Jack nods sadly before reversing the car and driving out of the parking lot, to your house.
The drive is quiet and full of tension.
“Take me on a date. Take me on a date and show me we’ll have enough time together.” You tell him.
A smile appears on Jack’s face as he realizes you’re giving him a chance.
“Where?” He asks, a full-on smile displayed on his face.
“You choose, just don’t flake on me.” You tell him.
“I won’t.” He smiles.
“Okay, text me when and where.” You tell him, getting out of the car.
Jack watches as you walk into your apartment building. He breaks out in celebratory yells and dances, pausing when he hears two knocks on his window.
“I, uh, I forgot my phone.” You laugh.
“Right, right. Here you go.” Jack says, giving you your phone.
You turn around and walk to your apartment, still laughing.
“Way to go, Jack,” Jack says, putting the car in drive and pulling off.
Tuesday
Jack: Can I come get you tonight at 7
Y/n: it’s 6
Jack: I know.
Y/n: I mean..sure?
Jack: Dress as casually as you can.
Y/n: I am confused.
Jack: don’t worry about it.
You sigh and get up from your spot on the couch, walking towards your room. You pick out a cute sweat suit and put it on. You decide to go for a simple and light makeup look and by the time you’re done with everything it’s 6:45. You sit on your bed for a bed swiping through Tik Tok when Jack texts you to tell you he’s downstairs.
“I said to dress casual.” Jack sighs.
“This is casual!” You argue.
“You could go out like that.” He smacks his lips.
“In Nike sweatpants and a matching hoodie?” You ask him.
“Maybe you just look that good.” He smiles.
“Tomato, tomato, tomato.” You say to him, gesturing your hands as if you’re throwing tomatoes at him.
“Man, I can’t compliment my date?” He smacks his lips.
“No. Now, where are we going?” You ask him, smiling.
“We’re gonna go pick up some food to go and that’s all I’m telling you right now,” Jack says, putting the car in drive.
Once Jack gets on the highway you notice he’s driving downtown.
“You told me to dress casual and we’re going downtown?” You ask him, flabbergasted.
“Yes.” He nods.
“This sounds like a setup.” You sigh.
“Shut up.” Jack laughs.
Jack parks outside of some food place and goes inside. He comes out carrying two bags filled with food.
“Damn, Jack.” You say surprised.
“What, I look good or something?” He smiles.
“No, dummy. Why we got all this food.” You laugh.
“So I don’t look good?” He asks scrunching his brows.
“Of course you do, Now why did you get all of this food?” You question him taking the bags from him and putting them in the back seat so he could drive.
“Cause I wanted you to be able to pick from whatever you wanted.” He shrugs.
He pulls up to a gas station.
“Go get two large slushies, while I fill up the tank.” He says to you, handing you his card.
“I can pay for that, Jack.” You laugh.
“Take it.”
“Nope.” You tell him and walk away into the store.
You grab two large slushie cups and fill one half and half with red and blue and one with all red for Jack.
You pay for them and join Jack who’s waiting in the car.
“Here ya go.” You say handing him his drink.
“Thank you, pretty girl.” He says out of habit.
The nickname makes you blush just as it did when y’all were together.
“Where are we going now?” You ask him, taking a picture of the setting sun with your phone.
“See that building right there?” Jack asks, pointing to a tall building.
“Yeah.” You nod.
“You can park your car on top, we’re gonna watch the sunset from up there and eat, and then we’re gonna drive around.” He says.
Your eyes soften as you realize what he’s doing.
“Like, our first date?” You ask him, tears forming in your eyes.
You didn’t think Jack even remembered your first date with him.
“Exactly.” He smiles.
Jack goes up the building's parking ramp, smiling at you laugh the whole time he goes through the swirls.
Once he parks on top the view is beautiful.
“Wow. It looks exactly the same.” You sigh, remembering your first date up here.
“You look just as beautiful as you did the first time.” He says.
He brings out the food and you laugh as you realize it’s the same food y’all ate the first time you came up here too.
“So, you just had this all planned out, huh?” You ask him.
“I did.” He nods.
“Thank you, Jack. This means a lot.” You tell him.
“I only have one request.” He tells you.
“What?”
“You end this date how we ended the first one.” He says.
You pause for a second, thinking about it. Jack went through so much to make sure this date was perfect. You’re sure you can make the relationship work this time with more communication.
“Okay.” You agree.
“Okay?” He celebrates.
“Okay.” You nod, laughing.
“Okay!” Jack yells, leaning over and kissing you.
You kiss him back, both of you smiling.
“We’re forever this time, baby. I promise.” Jack beams.
“We’re forever.” You agree.
“Put this back on,” he says digging your promise ring out of his pocket and placing it on your left ring finger.
“Thank you.” You smile.
“Promise to never take it off.”
“I promise.”
#jack harlow#jack harlow x reader#jack harlow smut#jack harlow angst#jack harlow fic#jack harlow imagine#jack harlow x y/n#jack harlow fluff#jack harlow concepts#dad!jack
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54. Did some force take you because I didn't pray?
Masterlist - Previously - Next
TW: Talks about child loss
Chapter soundtrack: Bigger than the whole sky - Taylor Swift
When they went through the door, Kyle immediately rushed to Julia, asking her a million questions to which she didn’t have the answer. The doctor didn’t want to tell her anything as she was not from the family even if she had argued Romy was like a sister to her. The more she was telling Kyle that she didn’t know anything, the more he was freaking out to the point Ethan feared for a moment they would be kicked out. When finally someone came to the Lamborghini driver to see what was going on, Kyle started to calm down and when he was asked to follow the doctor, Ethan frowned. Usually it was not a good sign.
People were looking at them weirdly and that’s when Ethan noticed they were still in their race suits, still smelling like cheap champagne. In the emergency of the situation, they hadn’t taken the time to change and he had to admit that it was not their best incognito strategy. Feeling uncomfortable Ludwig told him he was going on a quest to find something else for them to wear as they would be there for the next hours. He nodded before approaching Julia who was sitting in a chair, typing on her phone, probably telling that she was with Romy at the hospital and intended to stay until she had more news about the health of her best friend. When she looked up and saw Ethan, shyly approaching her she smiled.
“Congrats, mister Grand Prix winner. That was an outstanding race.”
“You watched?”
“Of course. I wouldn’t have missed it for the world. Even if I have to admit that not being able to scream and be happy because I was surrounded by people was very hard.”
He didn’t think much and took her in his arms , burying his head in her neck, smelling the scent of lavender that he had grown accustomed to. For a brief moment, he forgot about the race, his win and the fact that he was going to celebrate it in a hospital. It was just her and him. He felt her head resting against his chest, right where his heart had suddenly started to beat faster, and her arms locking behind his back, squeezing him harder.
“You smell like sweat and champagne.”
“I didn’t have the time to change. Kyle basically dragged us away as soon as he saw us.”
“It’s fine. I don’t mind.”
He finally let go of her right when Ludwig was reappearing with four bright oversized yellow and red sweatshirts as well as blue sweatpants. Ethan grimaced in front of the color association but didn’t say a word. He took a set in his hands and headed to the bathroom as Julia did the same and when they all came out, they laughed. They surely wouldn’t go unnoticed.
“We’re twinning! Pictures?” asked Ludwig, in an attempt to lighten the mood as Kyle was still not back, making them all worry.
They ended up sitting down in a calmer area, where there were not many people and Julia explained what happened. How Romy was way too pale for her liking and how despite her protests, she had taken her there for a check up.
“You did the right thing… You can never know. It’s not because it was a slight bump that it didn’t affect her. Lud, do you remember that time in F3, in Macao I think, when I was pushed off the track and the side of the car bumped into a wall. It was nothing, I basically brushed it, but it cost me three months of hard work with my physio because of a locked facet joint in my neck?”
“You were a whiny baby.” Ludwig smiled, reminiscing on that time.
“I swear after that, I took my neck training very seriously. But my point is, you did the right thing. And it’s probably nothing, Romy is a warrior.” Ethan wasn’t sure if he was trying to convince Julia or himself.
After what felt like a very long time, Kyle finally came back with the doctor, as pale as his white racing suit. Ethan tried to make eye contact but Kyle didn’t seem to even see his friends as he went to Romy’s room, alone. Julia stood up, followed by her friends and tried once again to find information on the situation.
“That’s not something that is my place to discuss, miss. I thought I had made it clear the first time around.”
“I know but please can you understand us? Romy is our friend, her family is not there, we are worried. You can’t blame us!”
“I understand but it’s something Miss Schumacher will tell you if she wants to. Don’t try to insist or I’ll personally make sure you find the way out of this hospital and never find your way in again.”
Julia was about to reply when Ethan took her by the arm and forced her to back down.
“What an ass.” she mumbled.
“I know but he does his job, you can’t blame him.”
They once again sat down and waited, eyes glued to the door in hopes to see Kyle opening and telling them to come inside, which didn’t happen. Julia was on her third cup of coffee when the door finally opened to reveal a red eyed Kyle. Traces of dry tears were visible on his cheeks and when he rushed to Ethan, almost collapsing in his arms, they knew it was bad. No one dared to say a word. Ethan looked at his friends, implicitly telling them he was taking Kyle away. The American needed to breathe and to be away from there.
“Can I go see Romy?” Julia asked, unsure.
“Please, do.” Kyle replied, in a hoarse voice, as Ethan and him were walking away.
“What should I do?” Ludwig asked, a little lost. “No, you know what? Don’t mind me. I’ll stay here. I’ll make sure no nosy people come to bother us.”
When Julia entered the room, she noticed the blinds closed even if it was sunny outside. The only ray of light was coming from the bedside lamp. Romy was laying on the side, her back facing the door, her blond hair scattered on the pillow. Julia stopped in her tracks, not knowing what to say or even if she should be here.
“Romy?” she whispered, scared to frighten her.
The German girl didn’t reply, didn’t even move to look at her friend. Julia slowly moved to her side to find her friend staring in front of her, her eyes almost dead.
“Talk to me, Romy… You’re scaring me.”
“I don’t have anything to say.”
Julia sat down on the armchair and looked worriedly at her best friend. She had never seen her like this. The happy and fierce Romy was gone, replaced with only a shell of what she once was.
“Okay… Do you want me to get you something? Water? Kyle? Do you want me to call your parents?”
“Kyle is probably hating me.”
“He could never. I’ve never seen a guy so head over heels for someone. He loves you, nothing could make him hate you…”
“I lost his baby, Julia.”
“What?” if Julia wasn’t already sitting, she would have fallen on the floor.
Romy finally looked at her, still looking very pale. Julia came closer, taking her cold hand in hers and squeezing it lightly, waiting for her friend to talk more.
“A little over a month. And I didn’t even notice. What kind of woman doesn’t even feel she could be pregnant?” her voice broke.
“You have so many things to think about, Romy… it’s normal…”
“The doctor said it was already a miracle that it survived this long. That with the G-forces, the speed, all the traveling around… it shouldn't have even been viable. He said it was a fighter. A fighter that I couldn’t even protect.”
She saw her friend’s body shaking and heard her cries. She bent down, throwing an arm over her side and nuzzled her head against her shoulder as she felt Romy curl up. Julia didn’t know what to say, she couldn’t understand how her friend was feeling and she was scared of saying something that would make everything worse. She could only be there, be the shoulder to cry on for Romy.
“Tell me how I can help you.”
“I don’t know… It’s weird. I’ve never thought of having kids, like ever. But now that it happened… I just realized that I want one. But only if it’s with Kyle and now… I don’t even know where we stand. I broke him. You should have seen how devastated he was and it’s all my fault. If only I had listened to my body, If only I would have felt it, I would have made the right decisions and none of this would have happened. Gosh, Julia… I drank champagne! I trained hard! Maybe I brought this on myself, maybe it’s just the sign that I’m not made for that… maybe…”
“Stop, Romy! It’s not your fault. None of this is your fault. I won’t let you blame yourself… And with Kyle, you’ll get through this. Maybe, maybe it was just not the right time…”
“Or maybe I just don’t deserve any of what would have happened if I had been less careless.”
“Romy…”
“I’m tired. I want to sleep.”
She closed her eyes, turning her back away from Julia who, saddened and feeling powerless, decided to leave the room.
After spending minutes walking around the corridors to find an exit to somewhere calm and peaceful, they found a patio. Ethan could hear Kyle harsh breath and a few hiccups here and there. He forced him to sit down on a bench and waited, unsure to say something.
“I killed it.” Kyle barely whispered.
“Oh wow.. Okay, I clearly didn’t expect that. Rewind, please.”
“We would have had a baby. And I killed it.”
“Romy is pregnant?” almost screamed Ethan attracting Kyle’s hard glance on him.
“Not anymore. Because I bumped into her. Because I didn’t see her.”
“Come on bro, you know it’s not true. You said it yourself, she was in your blind spot, there is nothing you could have done.”
“Maybe if I had not been so focused on getting out of the traffic, taking risks, she wouldn’t have been forced to be reckless. Maybe, if I had done a better qualifying, we wouldn’t have started side to side and I wouldn’t have touched her and sent her off track and our baby would have been alive. It’s all my fault… she says, it’s not. She says that I shouldn’t blame myself, she takes the blame, but I was the one that put an end to her race! If it had not happened, with the break we have now before the US races, we would have found out she was pregnant and we would have taken our responsibilities, but I didn’t offer us this chance. Just because I wanted to win so badly…”
“I’m sorry, Kyle…”
“I’ve always known I wanted to have kids with her. It has always been evident. I would have been the happiest… but now, I’m not even sure we are still a couple.”
“You guys need time to overcome this, but you will. I have no doubts about it. And we will all be there for you… we will help you, whatever you need. We are family, remember?”
“She is the one for me, Ethan. I swear there is nothing in this world that I want more than to grow old with her, to have kids with her… I’m scared I’ll lose her.” he took his head between his hands, letting out a few tears as Ethan put a hand on his shoulders.
“You won’t. I promise, you won’t.”
Leaving Kyle to his thoughts, Ethan found himself in the last place he ever thought he would end up. The hospital chapel. He sat on a bench and breathed deeply. From all the things he had ever imagined could happen to Kyle and Romy, this was very far away on his list. He had never seen his friend so broken, so sad, so helpless. A tear, involuntarily escaped his eye. What a day. A day that felt like a lifetime. He didn’t even have the time to check his phone. He was sure he had multiple phone calls from everyone but it would need to wait. His friends were what was important now.
“I’ve never thought I would see you in a chapel, of all places.” said a voice behind him.
“I needed a quiet place. I didn’t really know where to go…”
Julia sat down beside him, fumbling with her red bracelet.
“I can’t believe it.”
“Kyle and Romy?” he asked.
“Yeah… I don’t know what I can do to help. I feel so… useless.”
“You and I both. I think, unfortunately, it’s something they need to figure out by themselves.”
He felt her head falling on his shoulder as her hand reached out to his, linking their fingers together in the most natural way.
“It makes me think about how life is short and how we shouldn’t waste time, to try to be happy.”
“Are you happy, Joolsie?”
“No. I want to. But I don’t know how to be happy on my own. I’ve always relied on someone or something. My family, my friends, my job, you… I was happy as long as I wasn’t alone. But now… I don’t know. I feel like I’m at a crossroad and life is waiting for me to make the next big decision and it’s frightening because what if I’m wrong? What if I’m making another mistake? What if I lose everything for good?”
“You need to trust yourself. And what worse could happen? If you trip and fall, we will catch you.”
She gave him a sad smile and sighed.
“Are you happy?”
“I am. I think, if we put the reason why we are here in this freaking hospital aside, I’ve never been this happy. I’m getting to know myself better, and I’m going to have a therapy session with Sofia and my dad to talk about my childhood when we will be back home. I’m enjoying my time with my friends. I’m thriving in my job and if I’m being honest it’s probably the first time I’m taking this much pleasure driving in F1. I think a part of me had lost sight of why I was driving. It hurts to say but breaking up with you was the best thing that could have happened to me. At the time.”
He felt her stiffened against him.
“So… you’re happier without me.”
“No… I’m happy on my own. You by my side would just add to it. I would be happier. And that’s what you should find… you know, the first thing Sofia advised me to do was to find something that would make me happy. Something I would do for me and only me. And it worked pretty well.”
“What was it? If I can ask and if you want to tell me.”
“I joined a charity. They take care of children who went through road accidents and lost someone they loved. Some lost even more than that, there are two girls in a wheelchair and a boy who lost his leg. But they are so amazing, I learned a lot with them. And it made me realize how much I loved kids. I’m not saying I’m ready to have one! Gosh no. But you know… I could be the fun uncle one day because let’s be real, Romy and Kyle, if they manage to get through this, they will have an army at home. And… I don’t know. I’m getting ahead of myself. And I love your brother, too. It’s like a little brother for me too. Anyway, sorry. I’m rambling.”
“It’s cute. You’re cute. Do you think… Maybe I could come with you to meet the kids? I’m not saying I want to join you, it's just.. You talk about them with so much passion and care.”
“I’m sure they would love you. Actually, I’m supposed to meet them for dinner soon… It’s pizza. Do you, maybe, want to join?”
“I think I would like that.” she smiled and got up, still her hand in his.
Kyle was talking to Ludwig who had a clear shocked expression on his face. His usual smirk had disappeared, replaced by a dark face as he was rubbing one hand on Kyle’s back. The American looked up and noticed immediately how they were holding hands and Ethan, almost shameful, quickly let go of her as if showing any display of affection on a day like this was something bad.
“We are leaving if that’s fine with you…” Ethan told them.
“I’m staying with her. She doesn’t want to but I’m not going anywhere. I can’t go anywhere.”
“I’m going to go too… My flight is later tonight.” explained Ludwig. “We’ll see each other soon, alright?”
The group nodded. Julia went quickly to Romy to tell her goodbye and came back almost immediately with a defeated expression.
“She doesn’t want to talk to me…” she whispered as Ethan squeezed her shoulder.
“She needs time. It’s not against you.”
“I know. I just wish I could do more.”
They all came back to the hotel and took that as an opportunity to change. Ethan wanted to get rid of the hospital clothes as fast as possible and hop in the shower to wash away the remaining scents of sweat, champagne and now hospital that he still could feel.
Once done he quickly texted Jacky that he was on his way, with a special guest if she didn’t mind to which she replied that the kids were very excited to see him to congratulate him and to talk to him. They all were asking if he could bring his trophy and that made him smile. It was a big baby but he already knew where he would place it.
He met Julia in the lobby and together joined the restaurant where Ethan had made a reservation a few days before. Jacky and the group of kids were already at their table, laughing and talking. As soon as they saw Ethan, their smiles turned bigger and he was soon surrounded by questions and congratulations as they were trying to pull him by the sleeve.
“Kids, enough. Let the poor guy breathe. And who is the young lady, Ethan?” asked Jacky, smiling to Julia who was still a little quiet.
“This is my friend, Julia. She is an engineer.”
“Is she your special friend?” asked Ronan.
“What do you mean?”
“Is she a friend you kiss on the lips sometimes? My best friend’s dad has one.”
“Oh… well, no. We’re just good friends. That’s all…” Ethan felt himself blushing as he could see Julia turning red as well;
“What does an engineer do?” asked Audra, one of the girls in a wheelchair.
“My job is to help build a car which will go fast.” answered Julia, kneeling in front of the girl.
“So it can win?”
“Exactly.”
“That’s so cool! How do you do that?”
“With a lot of math and calculations and graphs. It’s fun.”
Soon a little group of kids gathered around Julia to keep asking her questions to which she happily answered. Ethan looked at her as a little girl, barely more than four years old, climbed on her lap and threw her hands around her neck. It was a cute scene and Ethan found himself snapping a quick picture to remember the moment.
“My boy, you are completely head over heels for this girl, am I right?”
“I know I am. Can you blame me?”
“Why aren’t you saying something?” Jacky asked him.
“Julia and I… it’s complicated. A lot of history. One day we will find our way back to each other, now is just not the time.”
“Right people, wrong time. I know that all too well…” whispered the woman.
Ethan was dying to ask her questions but he knew it was not his place to do so. They were not that close.
“Julia, when I grow up I want to be like you. I want to make cars like you.” said Audra.
“It’s a tough career path but if you remember who you are, always, you’ll make it. I have no doubt, sweetheart.” Julia replied, caressing her cheek.
She caught Ethan’s gaze on her and smiled. A real one, an appeased one, a happy one. One that reached her eyes and warmed his heart.
The way back to the hotel was made in a comfortable silence. Julia was humming the songs that were playing on the radio as Ethan’s hand was resting on her thigh, drawing circles on her naked skin.
“I already knew how good you were with my brother, but you’re really a natural with kids.”
“I told you they were amazing.”
“This girl… Audra… when she said she wanted to be an engineer like me later, you know? It really moved me. But I couldn’t help but think how hard it will be for her. Our world is not a nice one. Not for women. Look at Romy, look at Chloe, look at me… I don’t want it to keep on breaking us. I want women to feel safe to follow their dreams. I want Audra to be able to make it.”
“What do you have in mind?”
“I don’t know yet… It’s just a thought. For now.”
In front of her hotel room, a few memories caught up to Ethan. Nice ones. Very sweet ones.
“What a day…” he said, his throat dry.
“I don’t know if I told you but, I’m proud of you. Very, very proud. Of the driver you are and the man you’re becoming. And… I’m glad to be part of your life after all, even if it’s from the sidelines.”
“You know you’ll always be. You know I care about you, you know that I love you, Julia. Someone told me that we were just each other's right person at the wrong time. I’ll be waiting for our right time.”
She nodded, finding her place in his arms. They stayed that way for a bit until Ethan told her that he had to go. He felt her hand grabbing his wrist and her eyes diving in his. He didn’t notice straight away how she leaned in, and truth be told he thought he was doing it as well. He stopped her when she was a few centimeters away from his lips.
“No, Julia. We can’t fall back into our bad habits… You’re not ready.”
“I know. I’m sorry.” she whispered, pulling away.
“It’s not that I don’t want to…”
“Don’t. I understand. I broke your heart too many times for you to trust me on that, again.”
“Just like you need time to find yourself, I need time to make sure you won’t run away when feelings get deeper.” He kissed her on the forehead before whispering a good night.
“Eth?”
He turned away to look at her.
“You fought for me in the past, now it’s my turn.”
Author's note: I know it seems like they can't catch a break but I promise they will.
What do you think will happen next? Let me know your theories, I love to read them.
Don't hesitate to leave a comment or an ask, as well as reblogging and leaving a like. Besides the fact that I absolutely love to read you, it helps a lot for the story to find its audience. I also have a taglist for this story, so if you want to be added so you never miss a chapter, let me know.
Taglist:
@herondalism @aundercover @musingsbyshreya @karmabyfernando @reengard @mycenterfold @smoooothoperator
#writing#fiction#charles leclerc#f1 fanfic#f1 fic#f1 x oc#charles leclerc fanfic#max verstappen fanfic#max verstappen
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Hii! Can I ask for divorced sahyo in their 40s hooking up behind their kids back cuz they’re still in love with each other?
Love your work very much! Thanks in advance x
Sana relaxed back into the tussled sheets of a bed that hadn’t been hers for years, staring up into the empty sockets of the ceiling light. Funny, how years ago she would’ve been the one to replace the lights, but she supposed Jihyo had never gotten around to it this time.
Her chest clenched at the thought, something melancholy bubbling in her chest and burning the back of her throat. But that was when the silhouette of her ex wife appeared in the doorway, face hard set, something that Sana could see even if only her back was illuminated.
There was silence for a moment, just vacant stares in a blue tinted room. The sun had just set, meaning Jihyo had all the more reason to kick her out after their tryst. She practically expected it at this point, breaking her stare away from Jihyo’s to look away and brace for emotional impact.
But nothing of the sort came.
Instead, the sound of light footsteps on the wooden floor resounded. And the bed dipped before Sana could even process that the woman she still loved was laying right next to her nonchalantly. As if this was normal (how could it be normal at this point?).
Sana opened her eyes, empty sockets staring back at her again… but truly she was looking at the woman in her periphery. When would she send Sana on her way? It was only to be expected-
“The girls are out tonight. I’m not in a rush today.”
Oh. So that was it.
“Where are they?”
“Sleepover at a friend’s house.”
“On a weekday?” Sana questioned, letting her maternal emotions slip out just a bit.
Jihyo answered easily, sitting down on the side of the bed. Though Sana could tell the question prickled her a bit. “They’re 12 and 14 now, you know. I think they’ll be more than fine staying somewhere else for a night and getting their homework done.”
She tried to ignore the annoyance dripping from Jihyo’s tone. Knew that somewhere in there, there might be a “well I’m the one who looks after them.” She wasn’t in a mood to argue about her work travels or how often she was in town, especially if there was no need.
That’s what had made them like this in the first place.
“Right...”
There was silence again. Cold silence. A chill ran down Sana’s spine, though it had nothing to do with her lack of clothes.
Jihyo was turned away from her, the tanned skin of her back being the only comforting thing for Sana at the moment.
To think that minutes ago, she’d been nearly clawing at it, desperate for some sort of solace.
She would never say it out loud, but no one knew her better than Jihyo. She’d been on a million and one dates in the past 5 years, and not one had made her feel the same way. Not even the people she’d seen more than once. And when it came to the bedroom… well that was even worse.
Only Jihyo knew exactly just what to do. What she liked and what she needed in the moment, unspoken. They’d built something together, created a love, a language just for the two of them. And the thought of attempting to do that all over again? She just couldn’t do it.
“Do you think that we’d have another shot at something one day?,” came Jihyo’s hesitant voice, curling from around her like smoke. It was suffocating, a question Sana absolutely didn’t want to hear. Not like this.
Not when she was so close to giving in.
“It would never work, Ji. You know this already. We-“
“I know, I know,” Jihyo groaned, “But just… humor me for a minute.”
Sana sighed, knowing this was a bad idea. She had an inkling Jihyo missed her just as much as she missed Jihyo. She couldn’t deny how much her heart yearned for her. How much she still loved the woman… but she just couldn’t go through the pain of heartbreak again.
Not when she traveled just as much as she used to. If Jihyo felt neglected then, getting back together would just put them in the same spot.
She knew this was a bad idea, yet she played along. “Ok. In a perfect world…”
She plucked at one of her fingernails, focussing on it instead of anything else.
“In a perfect world, where we never fought, where we stuck to our vows, where the kids hadn’t seen how messy the divorce was, where we-“
“Sana-“ Jihyo groaned.
“Right, ok.”
“I think… that I can’t work the way I do forever. I love my job. Well… you know that. But, there are times where I wish…”
Sana’s tongue felt heavy in her mouth.
“I wish I could be there for you again.”
She wasn’t expecting a response. Nor was she expecting Jihyo to finally move, laying next to her under the sheets. They weren’t close enough to touch, but the warm wall of body heat between them still made Sana’s eyes misty. She was still in love, but she hated this. Hated what had happened. Getting back together now was out of the question. She’d only have Jihyo physically, sexually. For now. It just wouldn’t work.
The empty sockets stared at her. She stared back.
Jihyo sighed. “I wish you could too.”
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So This is Love || Age of Ultron 2: “Uncle Steve Knows Best”
“So This is Love” Masterlist
Previous Chapter || Next Chapter
─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───
My foot tapped against the floor to the light upbeat tune playing from the elevator's speakers. Eyes, staring up at the rising number above the doors.
My mini-party didn't last long as my destination was only a floor above the helipad.
As soon as the doors opened, I was greeted by Steve's startled expression. "Y/N," he said my name like it was unnatural to find me in my own home.
"Mister Rogers!" My hand shot up in a mock salute.
He shook his head. "You make me sound like the old guy from that kid's show you used to watch," he chuckled.
"I'm not too far off," I shrugged smugly. Although my smile fell as the elevator doors began to shut, making me squeeze through at the last minute.
Steve only laughed. "You calling me old, kiddo?" He jerked his head up towards the stairs, indicating that I follow him.
"Does it really count as being old if you've been asleep for like... a million years and still look young?" I partially joked as we traversed up the stairs.
"Sixty-six years," he scoffed. "And that depends on how you see it. I'm either 30ish or 100ish."
"So you're like my Uncle Grandpa?" I snorted.
"That sounds... Pretty lame. As you would say."
"I think it sounds cooler to brag about having an uncle who's a hundred years old and can still kick ass," I said, poorly imitating the punches I've seen him throw.
He laughed at me. "Don't say ass," he scolded, raising his hand to ruffle my hair to which I whined.
Silence washed over us and I turned around to find Steve had stopped halfway up the stairs. The smile he directed at me began to feel a bit forced if not beginning to feel pitiful.
"What?" I asked.
Then he asked me a question...
A question that seemingly came out of nowhere. A question I didn't expect to catch me off guard. A question that deprived me of the positive energy I felt when bantering with Steve just a moment ago.
"You doin' okay?"
"What do you mean?" I knew what he meant. I just wanted to be sure before I suffocate him with years of worry and anxiety.
"After what happened with Loki, you've been very..." He paused. "You've been around more. Not that having you around a lot isn't nice. I just can't see your dad without you tailing him like you're part of his shadow. Not to mention being the first face we see every time we land the jet."
I huffed, tilting my head up at the see-through walls of my father's lab. The same lab I was on my way to before our untimely encounter. A look of uncertainty replaced the one of worry on Steve's face.
"At first I thought it was puberty but I realized that was stupid." He continued to climb, catching up with me and putting an arm around my shoulders. "Come on. Tell uncle Steve what's wrong."
A small smile flashed on my lips for a mere second. "I... I'm scared... For my dad's well being," I answered. It wasn't what he was expecting but I wasn't sure if it was what I was expecting either.
"Of course. But there's something else, isn't there? You want to be able to do something more than just sit and wait each time we go out." Steve pushed on, pushing us along. I glanced up at the lab, seeing my dad and Bruce having their own conversation.
It got me thinking.
Being overprotective of my father because I couldn't help. Because of the barrier standing between me and being there beside him every time he went and faced whatever dangers were out there.
The same barrier that would've divided him from the rest of the Avengers if only he didn't have that damn suit...
And then it clicked.
I turned to look at Steve who seemed amused by the sudden shine in my eyes as I realized what I was missing this entire time.
"I wanna be an Avenger."
That, apparently, wasn't the answer Steve was looking for when the colour drained from his face.
But the adrenaline coursed through my veins at the revelation I had just made.
"I wanna have my own suit! So I can be part of the team and go on super cool missions with you guys and never have to worry about my dad ever again because I'll always be there!"
Steve dropped his arm from my shoulders and rapidly shook his head at that. "No, Y/N. That's not what I meant. You're only fifteen-"
"Why not? I learned Taekwondo when I was seven! With my dad's tech, I could be the next Iron Man! I'm gonna go!" I exclaimed, pushing past Steve and darting back down towards the elevator. "Thanks, Uncle Steve!"
"Y/N, wait!"
● ◉ ◎ ◈ ◎ ◉ ●
The next time I ever saw my dad after my talk with Steve was days later.
He and Bruce spent late nights in the lab, working on something they refused to let me know about.
I wasn't too upset. I was thankful it gave me time to build up the courage to ask him about a suit.
After all, it's what gave him the ability to fight with the Avengers. Plus they could always use the extra hand. I didn't know what else I could do if I couldn't look out for my dad with him on the front lines.
All I had to do was find him. The task already being a hassle as I struggled to get hold of Jarvis right as the party began. I waved it off as a delay, thinking it was my father showing him off to his guests.
I had bumped into every single person in the room except my father. Half the people already pulled me into lengthy conversations and jokes about my life as a modern-day Rapunzel having not left the tower since I was born. Some even tried to get me to put a good word in with my dad who I myself could not, for the life of me, find.
I was surprised he didn't spot me seeing as my pink dress made me stick out like a sore thumb. I wasn't particularly fond of it as it made me look half my age but it was something he designed so I didn't get lost in the sea of people.
Pretty ironic.
I was ready to give up, plucking a glass of red wine from one of the unguarded tables with no intention of actually drinking it, and aiming for a sofa to collapse into when I heard someone clear their throat to my right.
... Or cover up the word "Testosterone" with a forced cough.
I turned to where it came from and smiled seeing Maria and Rhodey walking away from Thor who was conveniently standing next to Tony.
"Hey! There she is!" my father pointed at me then squinted his eyes at the cup in my hand. "Is that wine?"
I eyed the people around me and quickly handed the glass to a random passerby before skipping towards the duo. "Not a drop, I swear," I ran a finger over my chest, crossing my heart.
He grumbled out, "Good. I don't want to see you turn out like I did."
"Thor! Have you greeted Thor?" He asked as quickly as a look of concern flashed on my face.
I shook my head and smiled at the god who was almost twice my height. "Good evening, sir," I spoke meekly.
Talking to Thor wasn't the most fun thing in the world. As easily as I get along with most of the team, Thor was just one of those I couldn't seem to keep a conversation with. Which was strange seeing as I would've loved to hear all about the realistic bits of Norse mythology.
"Greetings, young Stark..."
Silence...
Awkward silence...
Then a cough from my dad. "Alright. Hey, little Neoma! Uh- Thor, could you excuse us?"
I was pulled-... No, dragged by my dad by the heels of my peach-coloured doll shoes which scraped against the polished floorboards.
"I should put a tracker on you. That was a hell of a first hour," he joked as we stopped by a support beam.
I didn't have time to waste. Losing him now would mean spending ages finding him again. "Dad, I wanted to ask you something."
"Straight to the point. Go on." He leaned against the beam.
I took a deep breath. "Can I get fighting lessons?" I asked, already regretting it when the positive energy emitting from my father turned sour.
He didn't respond, trying to read my face for any hints that I was merely joking while at the same time trying to process an answer.
"What? Like self-defence stuff? Taekwondo? Or Karate?" He lifted his hand to mimic a chop, dropping it immediately and making it seem like he changed his mind halfway.
"... I want to learn to fight like Aunt Natasha and Uncle Steve. If not, I want a suit like yours so I can-"
"Are you joking?" He asked genuinely. "Is this a joke? Okay, I get it. It's payback for the whole 'sentient' thing, isn't it?" He laughed. "Because like hell am I gonna put my fifteen-year-old daughter in an Iron Man suit. Heck, even if you were thirty, I wouldn't put you in a suit."
I felt my heart sink, hands clenching at my sides. "I don't think I can spend another day with you risking your life out there while I'm in here not doing nothing to help whatsoever!" I argued.
"And I don't think I can spend even a second fighting and babysitting you, praying to God that when I come home, you come home with me... Alive and well," he spoke sternly, leaning in to make sure I heard him loud and clear over the party.
My breathing hitched as I did everything in my power not to cry right then and there. I opened my mouth to speak.
"You want fighting lessons? I'm finding you a trainer. For self-defense," he finished the conversation for us both.
My head began to ache, unable to situate my feelings and thoughts after the exchange with my father.
I never was good with emotions and feelings...
Wonder whose fault that was.
He sighed and spoke up again, this time in a kinder tone. "Look, Munchkin... We talked about this. What I'm doing is for your safety. I can't let the world go to shit when I know my little girl is in it..."
I frowned, dropping my eyes down to the shiny floorboards.
"I swore on my life that I'd be there to see you live yours. So don't ever worry about me not coming home. Because every time I find myself stuck in a situation I think I can't get out of, I remind myself..." He paused to run a hand through my hair softly, lifting my head to look me in the eyes.
Whatever he was about to tell me, I always knew the meaning behind the words was that he does everything for me. I just never understood to what extent.
I was always selfish. Always wanting the best of both worlds. Where our planet was guaranteed safety and I had my father with me. But I knew I had to accept whatever the conditions were, living under Tony Stark's roof.
So I was ready to ball my eyes out the moment he finished his heartfelt message.
"I'm not ready to leave all my money with Y/N."
I snorted, shoving his hand off my head and turning to wipe the stray tears that had escaped from the build-up.
"I hate you." He scoffed at that and put his drink down on a nearby counter to wrap both his arms around me.
"I don't think you do," he whispered when I returned his embrace. "Please listen to me when I say this, Neoma... I love you. And there isn't a day where I won't come back to you."
That's all I needed to hear.
─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───
#Peter Parker#peter parker x reader#peter parker x you#peter parker x stark!reader#peter parker fluff#peter parker x stark!daughter#mcu#marvel#marvel reader insert#slowburn#sheltered reader
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Miles swallowed as he spotted Janice walk into the bodega. He sighed as crawled down the wall of a nearby building before he hopped onto the sidewalk.
“God.. don’t make me regret this” Miles muttered to himself as he entered the bodega.
The door chimed as it always did. A conversation at the front desk had gone silent.
Miles froze as the door closed behind him, his gaze meeting Janice’s as they stared at each other. Tension hung heavy in the air as Clerk glances between the two.
“… What the hell are you doing here?” Janice asked, her hand wandering towards her gun holster. Janice narrowed her eyes at him, as if to study him.
“Uh.. I could ask you the same thing..” Miles said as he felt a cold sweat coming down.
Clerk sighed as she put her phone down.
“If you two are gonna fight, I’m gonna ask you both to take it outside, ‘kay?” She drawled, sounding more annoyed than anything.
Janice looked like she wanted to argue with Clerk but… she didn’t. She resigned herself to walk away from the counter, towards the front where Miles stood.
Miles meekly stepped out her way to let her pass by to walk out the door…
[Miss]
Only for her cold, metal hand seize him by the shoulder without warning, practically throwing him out of the bodega and onto the street.
Miles could feel a chunk of his health get knocked out of him as he collided onto the pavement. As he struggled to get up, his Spider-sense picked up a bullet shot in his direction.
[Dodge]
He darted away from the bullet, now on the move as the battle truly began.
“Beetle, just listen to me,” he shouted as he continued to evade her onslaught of gunfire, “I know you have a million questions—I get it, you’ve been seeing shit that doesn’t really make much sense. And it probably scares you too, right?”
Janice charged towards him, readying her next attack.
[Miss]
Miles immediately was held up by the neck, feeling the gauntlet tighten as she began to strangle him.
“And what would you know about that?” she hissed.
“A lot actually,” Miles coughed before he made a swift kick to her chest.
Janice grunted, letting Miles go as she recoiled from the pain. That didn’t keep her down for long as she went back to chasing after him.
“Yeah?” She said as she began to swing punches at him, “Why should I listen to you?”
“First of all, I’ve been to that bodega way more than you,” Miles said as he managed to avoid meeting her iron clad fists, “Second, I’ve been in your shoes—I’ve seen things that made me question the reality of the world too. I mean, you’ve seen me die and come back just fine—imagine how I feel about dying all the time!”
Janice’s punches began to miss Miles more and more, her previous focus starting to crumble as she thought about what Miles said to her. It eventually slowed to a stop, her brow furrowed as a grimace formed on her face.
“… You’re right—I don’t get it,” she admitted as she threw her hands up in frustration, “I just… This shouldn’t BE happening. I tried to ignore it, but ever since I saw you, of all people, come back even though I know I killed you..”
She trailed off, now pacing around in the street as Miles watched her.
“I can’t just say this shit to anyone,” Janice grumbled, “They’d think I’ve lost it. I can’t even tell my friends or family about this! Who would believe me?”
“… I would,” Miles said.
Janice stopped pacing to look directly at Miles. She crossed her arms, eyeing him up and down.
“… So, why go out of your way to do this for me?,” she asked, “What’s the point?”
“… Because I’ve seen what happens to people who have no one to talk to about this kind of thing,” Miles answered, “It.. it drives people off the deep end. Even if we’re not on the same side, I don’t want that to happen to anyone..”
Janice goes quiet as she stuffed her hands into her coat pockets.
“You don’t have to be my friend, Beetle,” Miles continued, “I just wanted to let you know that you’re not alone in this.”
With that, Miles shot a web and began to swing away from the scene. Beetle watched him for a while before she walked away in the opposite direction, her mind currently weighing her options after her encounter with Spider-Man…
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Record Scratch Chapter 3 -Fanfiction
Nino is finally feeling a bit better about life. He can talk to Alya again, he can have fun with his friends again. the only thing troubling him is his curiosity. Chloé Bourgeois is the last person he would have expected to help. He needs to find out why she did, and what it means. Full text after the break.
Chapter 4(next chapter) contains some(very mild) NSFW so I'll be seeing if I can figure out the content filters for that one.
Nino was late today. Late for being early that is, and it was on purpose. He had on his favorite sweatshirt, the one he hadn’t worn since the… he could think it now, breakup. The dark green hoodie was soft, warm, and in the past year Alya had worn it more than he had. Nino strolled into civics and caught Marinette on the way back to her seat. He flashed her a smile that wasn’t very big, but didn’t take any faking. “Hey, Mar.”
She had been hurrying, having come from Alya, but stopped. She looked confused for a moment, but it broke into one of her perky upbeat grins. “Hey, Nino! Is it a good day?”
There were butterflies in his stomach. He’d been sad for so long that being upbeat seemed like a transgression. He reminded himself, butterflies tickle, they don’t hurt. “It’s still early, Mar. I’m good though, and the rest is up to the day, not my problem.”
Marinette’s eyes tracked as if reading his words in the air, comprehension dawned, and she came down off her eggshells. “I’m so glad!” She threw her arms around him in a sudden hug.
Nino chuckled, faking a stagger; Marinette was all softness. A head smaller than him and too kind for this world, she hadn’t been able to budge him since they entered Lycée. It was fun when she tried though. “Aight, Mar. I gotta get to my seat. See you at lunch?”
She let him go and nodded in surprise-turned-joy. “You bet! Ummm, should I get a table for…?”
Nino saved her. “As many as you want, Mar.”
Marinette nodded twice, hands pressed together before her, before turning to run back to her desk. Nino caught her excited fist-pump out of the corner of his eye though.
Nino walked to his seat, slinging his bag onto his desk. Alya didn’t look up immediately, and he couldn’t blame her. He’d needed the time, or the kick in the pants, or whatever it was, but that didn’t mean he hadn’t been a sop to deal with these last few weeks. Well, here goes. “Hey, babe.”
The clouds parted from above Alya’s brows and tentative hope blossomed in her eyes. “Hi, Deej. How are you?”
That’s the million dollar question. Nino took stock before answering. “It still hurts, babe, but I’m doing better. I’ve got a handle on it now.”
Joy mixed with guilt on Alya’s face. Nino fought off his urge to take her in his arms. He let her work through what she was feeling, and listened when she replied, “You know I never meant to hurt you, right? I just think this is the smartest thing for us. It would be different if we were both in the same career tracks, or going to the same university. I don’t want either of us doing something dumb like following the other, or pining over a long distance maybe and missing out on years of our lives.”
She was building up steam. Nino could see it, because he’d been it, so very recently. I might still be it, on any given day. He reached across and laid a hand on her desk, not touching her directly. “Babe, I know. I know you didn’t mean to hurt me, but that doesn’t mean I’m not gonna feel hurt. I’m working on it though, I mean it. I understand why you wanted this -no. I understand why you think this is the right thing to do. I know you well enough to know you didn’t want this.”
The smile she gave him was grateful. Alya scooted her hand closer to him. A pause, then she laid her hand atop his and gave a squeeze. “I’m glad.”
Nino tempted his demons. He leaned across and kissed her gently on the temple. “Hey, I love you, babe.”
He saw happiness bloom and get smothered in two heartbeats. She opened her mouth to protest, but Nino touched a finger to his own lips and added. “It doesn’t mean anything more than that, honest.”
Some of the gloom lifted from her again, but whatever she had planned to say to him was cut off as the teacher entered. They both scrambled to finish getting ready as class began. As the lecture droned on, Nino took a second stock of himself.
Yes, the hurt was still there, but it was open to the air. His bones were raw, but healing. He’d faced the uncertainty of the future, cherished mementos of the past, and was aware of the diversity in the present. It felt… good? He wasn’t under any illusion he wouldn’t have bad days, but bad days that were the exception were better than those that were the rule.
In the center of all of this rebirth was a figure he still couldn’t wrap his head around, Chloé Bourgeois.
The dame was dangerous. It’d been years since I’d laid eyes on her, but that hadn’t changed. What angle was she playing? Getting one over on an old rival seemed like the kind of story that covered up for something more. I wasn’t her type. Her type was money, money and power. Adrien Agreste had been her type once. I’d heard stories others had been too. XY, the singer. Prince Ali. There was even some rich kid from the states.
This was all the gossip vine though. Stories swapped over drinks and whispered behind hands and pointed fingers. What was the real story here? Was it better or worse? It was a mystery, and mysteries ran in my blood. I had the time now, and something to sink my teeth into might just keep me out of trouble.
—-------
Lunch was just lunch, and that was awesome. It wasn't without hitches. Old habits died hard. Marinette and Adrien did everything they could to pave over every awkward moment as Alya and Nino still worked to sort themselves out. Nino was grateful and cherished them for it, now that he was in a place to appreciate it.
The end of lunch was where everything took a turn, and it was all his doing. They were heading out of the cafeteria. Adrien was telling them about a time he was stuck on a rooftop for three hours when a crane broke on one of his old photo shoots. In the middle of his story, as casual as can be, Alya interrupted. "Two o'clock."
The foursome shifted their path. Adrien didn't even break stride in his story. Five steps later the pattern clicked. Nino looked back over his shoulder. There she was, bag held across her chest.
Chin high and eyes staring through all four of us. Like minnows before a shark, we just made way without thinking. Or was it clean souls before a leper? Those eyes locked on me. I slowed my pace.
From in front of me, "Nino?"
Those blue eyes narrowed in warning. But then, I wouldn't be much of a private eye if I shied away from danger would I?
"I'll catch up with you later." I called back to my friends.
I set my feet on a path across no-man's land. We were, both of us , tall enough that the sea of bodies between us was no camouflage. I watched the change as I approached. Warning turned over into a flash of the starkest fear I had ever seen. Then the mafia mask slammed into place -too late, and that fine boned jaw set.
"What do you want?" She preempted me.
'Princess out of her castle?' I mused to myself.
That bag was a shield now, not a club. I wouldn't find answers in a hallway though, and I knew better than anyone just what a shield could keep out. "I don't think I ever thanked you."
"I am sure I have no idea what you are talking about." Those eyes promised pain, but they slid off me too quickly to seal the deal. They darted- left, right.
"Right." I let her know with my tone I wasn't buying it. "You know, you still have quite a setup. Maybe I could put it through some less intense paces sometime?"
"They're watching." She hissed. Then in a rush, "You want it? Whatever. Whenever. I'll have a key made."
I pushed my luck. "Tonight?"
That prompted a sharp inhale, "Fine. Ask for Jean." Her eyes scanned the teeming hall. "You'll regret this."
"Maybe," I countered. "But I'm tired of regretting things I haven't done."
Beebee's eyes went wide. It was easy to forget how large they were, she so rarely left those windows open. She bit her bottom lip, and her face trembled with contained emotion. Would I be nothing more than a scream someday?
In place of an answer I got a loud 'hmph.' She turned and stalked away, heels clicking on the linoleum. Those that moved out of her way too slowly were pulled to safety by their peers.
I watched her go, but hated to see her leave. I had my in. The real mystery would unfold tonight. Now, I just had to handle the press.
"What was that all about?" Marinette filled in for an Alya who was clearly hanging back.
Three pairs of eyes were a firing squad. I smiled at death. "It's just a little something I'm working on."
"Working on," Alya's deadpan pushed her to the fore. Crossed arms and that over-the-glasses stare brought back memories. "And Chloé Bourgeois is involved how?"
Memories; but against my wishes, I was a free man now. For the very first time, it did me any good. I flashed my trio of friends an unhelpful smile. "That's a good question."
“Here you are, monsieur, as instructed.” Jean handed the keycard across the counter to Nino.
Nino turned it over in his hand, ”That’s it? I just go up?”
Jean eyed him with an appraisal that seemed kind but cautious. “That is all I was told. You were to be given a key. I know nothing more, monsieur.”
Nino looked down at the key in his hand. “That seems weird.” He looked back up at Jean. “Does that seem weird to you?”
“Mademoiselle is… unconventional.”
Nino snorted, sliding the key into his pocket. “Yeah, no kidding.”
He felt weird heading up without her. Every step he expected her to explode from the elevator, swoop from behind, or simply appear beside him. Dame knows how to make an entrance.
The floors ticked up on the elevator, a countdown in reverse. I tried to remind myself why I was here. There was only one problem with that little situation. I had not a damn clue. The doors opened and I stepped into the hall. It was deathly quiet, it always was up here. How good was the soundproofing in her suite, I wondered. Was this serene expanse an earthquake in the making when she had one of her sessions?
Click-click and a green light, the keycard granted me access. I pushed open the door, but when again, no hurricane came I paused on the threshold. “Chloé?”
No answer. Was this an ambush? Answers, I wanted answers. What was it she wanted though? Maybe I should have thought of that sooner. I stepped into that green and gold luxury. I felt instantly out of place. A room that had seemed small when she occupied it felt cavernous. Something previously intimate, was cold and lifeless. I began to dread what I might find.
I called her name again, and headed first to the sitting room, the yelling room, the room of my salvation. The room that had brought Alya back to me. It was immaculate, even the remotes were in perfect order on the coffee table. It was also as lifeless as the first. I crossed to the counter-console. The scuff of my tennis shoes on the marble made me feel like a kid. I flicked the switch to transform the room into a studio and cringed. The mechanical process was jarring and raucous, another thing that had never registered with BeeBee’s presence muffling the senses.
I ran my hands over the console. It was like touching an angel. Was this why I was here? It was the excuse I’d made. I could do so much with this. I could tease out the itch that had formed under my fingertips. Yet, like everything else, it was dead. There were no painted nails to tease it to life with quick, expert flicks. It would be wrong to wake the beast alone. A machine like this had a divine spark. You needed to be invited to approach.
I left the console and walked back into the foyer. I preemptively ducked my head as I crossed the threshold, fully expecting the onslaught.
Nothing.
Emptiness did more to sap my strength than the worst of akuma beatings. I tried the balcony doors as I passed, locked. That left only one place.
The curtains to her room were drawn. Plush folds obscured everything, a menacing, and yet so very fragile barrier. “Chloe?” I called again, standing supplicant before them.
I could just go in. There would be answers galore in there, no doubt. A private dick’s gold mine. I had no idea what I’d find in there. Ha, mountains of clothes maybe? A full length ceiling portrait of Adrien? The jokes were old, and felt stale as I dug them out of the past. I checked myself at the flutter of guilt. This was BeeBee the Brat. Daughter of the most corrupt family in Paris. What was I doing getting involved?
I stuck my hand into the breach. The thick curtains parted like silk before a blade. I paused. This was it, such a useless defense. I’d stood in this room twice now, scant feet from her inner sanctum and this bit of nothing was the only protection she had. I appreciated the solid wood and lock protecting my own second-self. Just one more step, one little push. I just had to close my eyes and-
Nino yanked his arm back and turned away from the curtains. His breathing was too quick. He let it settle before walking back to the entrance to the suite. There he keyed open an intercom beside the door.
“Yes?”
“Is Jean there?”
“Jean? Which Jean do you mean, monsieur?”
“Jean-Jean. Jean-whatever. Chloé’s Jean.”
“One moment, Monsieur.”
Nino leaned on the wall beside the intercom. Reality was wrestling fantasy for least believable, and right now, it was winning.
A familiar voice came on the line. “This is Jean, Monsieur.”
“Chloé’s not here.”
“No, monsieur. She went out.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“You did not ask, monsieur.”
Nino thumped the wall beside the speaker. “Where did she go?”
“I do not know, Monsieur.” Dames.
“Do you have her number?”
“I do, monsieur.”
Nino couldn’t believe he was asking for this. “Can you give it to me?”
“Oui, monsieur.”
—--------
It didn’t take a genius to find someone once you had their phone number, even if they didn’t answer. In the old days you needed a lead, you needed a stake out, you needed to know how to tail. Now, you just needed to know GPS existed.
Monceau park. Nice place, if you dig old stones and lots of green. It was deep night by the time I got there, and I wasn’t entirely sure I believed what my phone was telling me. This wasn’t the kind of place to find BeeBee with the sun out and a dozen attendants on hand. On a chilly night, behind locked gates, seemed absurd. I was in for absurd at this point though. A little light trespassing and the parkour that Alya had insisted on long ago put me over the gates and inside. Now, to find a golden needle in a green haystack.
I found her on the old footbridge over the stream, because if I had the heart of a romantic, she had the whole body of a Greek tragedy. She was in all the wrong clothes for a park. An off the shoulder body-hugging knee length dress. Likely ivory in the sun, it was a deep bronze under the moon. She would have made a splash in any number of clubs or lounges across Paris. Yet here she was, behind iron bars and not even gilding to frame her.
I stepped up and leaned on the side of the bridge beside her, matching her posture for posture. “Is it High Fish Society tonight?”
She didn’t look at me. Not that I wanted her to. Those eyes made thinking hard. “What are you doing here?”
“I could ask you the same thing, babe.”
“No.” She growled. I took the hint.
“The question still stands, aureate.”
“You’re going to make me look that up, just to know how mad I should be.”
“Means goldilocks. You’re still playing dodgeball with me.”
“What’s with the way you’re talking? It’s Ridiculous! Utterly ridiculous.”
She had me pegged. This wasn’t the time or place to be without my wits, but sometimes you just dive in bare handed.
Nino pulled his cap off and rubbed the back of his head. “It’s a habit, when things get too intense sometimes.”
She still didn’t turn, but I saw the slow shift of the eye closest to me. Black within deepest blue sizing me up. “Did you break it?”
Nino laughed, holding his hat in his hands for now. “No, didn’t have the heart to turn it on. She’s yours. I figured you’d be there.”
“Why on earth would I be there? You wanted to play with a toy. You don’t need me for that.”
Nino looked around. “And hiding out in a locked park in the middle of the night, in the cold, is something normal people do?”
Her shoulders slumped. “Shut up.”
Nino shrugged amid his lean on the rail. “I just figured, you know, we’d hang out.”
Chloé scoffed, a sharp laugh overflowing with bitterness. “You want to hang out? You’ve got friends for that. We’re nothing alike. Just tell a few stories about our time in Collège among each other, and get it out of your system.”
Nino turned around, putting his back to the railing and folding his arms. He leaned back until he could catch her gaze. She pushed off the railing once he did. He straightened up, keeping eye contact. “Maybe I do want to hang out. Maybe it’s with you. Maybe it’s all a stupid idea, but then I’ve never been accused of being the smartest in the group. The thing is, I learned recently that sometimes you gotta try something that scares the hell out of you, in order to move forward. So, what do you say? Too good for the room?”
Her gaze slid to the water. She picked up her clutch from the railing, only to pick at it. “Your clothes are hideous.”
“They’re comfy.”
“You’re playing some weird game with me.”
“Do I need to bring up the past couple weeks? You haven’t taken your victory lap in front of the others yet that I can tell.”
She tensed at that, but her fidgeting loosened her up quickly. “Don’t talk to me at school again.”
Nino felt confident enough to tease. “Might be bad for my image, I know.”
Chloé’s gaze focused back on him. She was strangling her clutch at her waist. “Fine! Fine, you odd little man. We can hang out. Once. I’ll let you show me how that thing you are so fascinated by works.”
Nino grinned “Cool.”
She rolled her eyes. Then ran her hands up and down her arms. “It is cold.”
Nino pushed off the railing and stepped in. “Well, you were the one who went out wearing half a dress.”
She groused as she fished an ancient looking key from her clutch. “This is fashion. You make sacrifices.”
Nino turned and sketched a half-bow before putting his hat back on. “Like being cold?”
Chloé stepped around him towards the end of the bridge, then paused. “Yes.”
She jumped when Nino’s sweatshirt landed across her shoulders. He fell in beside her, and got to see her go through a real struggle between being aghast and absorbing the much needed residual heat still in the garment. In the end she said nothing. She folded her arms, one hand squeezing a handful of the cotton and pulling it closer.
Nino stuck his hands in his pockets, wishing he could slip back into detective mode. The problem was, it seemed like he cared too much to play the angle. “C’mon I’ll take you home.”
#mlb fanfic#chloe bourgeois#nino lahiffe#marinette dupain cheng#alya cesaire#DJBling#miraculous ladybug
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CHAPTER 4
SUMMARY - Lydia Lupis had lived a terrible 14 years of life. She went to a school full of drug dealing thieves and gangs, lived in a shitty neighbourhood, had parents that didn't even give a shit about her to come home and a brother that treated her like absolute trash. The only half decent thing in her life was a stupid camp - Camp Rim of the World. Her brother Conrad gad a job there but instead of actually doing it, he just snogged any girl he could find, leaving Lydia to do his job for him. Lydia was never that much of a social person and usually spent most of her time at the camp either working or in her own cabin reading. Lydia expected these school holidays to be the same as every other, but what she didn't know was that these holidays were going to change her life. Aliens were taking over planet earth and after following three kids into the woods and meeting a strange boy, the fate of the world somehow rest in their hands. With her new found friends will they be able to save the world before humanity becomes extinct and will a curtain strange boy steal Lydia's heart or smash it into a million pieces?
WARNINGS - i wrote this story years ago so i can’t remember exactly what’s in this but let me know if i miss anything! swearing, mentions of abuse, mentions of parental neglect, mild violence and threatenings, use of weapons, blood?, mega freaking cringe read at your own risk lol
"That's a great idea Gabriel," ZhenZhen complimented, "Now let's get some bikes and kick some ass!"
She then sassily walked past Gabriel and into one of the sheds to get a bike.
"Damn girl, your English is good!" Dariush said making my eyes roll, and everyone walked into the shed after her.
"They gave us a code at registration. It's um.. six, six, nine," Dariush said as Gabriel knelt down and picked up the bike lock. He began twisting the numbers, getting each number mixed up and trying over and over again but failing every time. Gabriel began to panic a little when Dariush kept pressuring him and telling him to hurry up and it just made it worse when he didn't stop. But then Dariush said something that made Gabriel's blood boil and rage take over his mind.
"Just hurry up and put it in there. Are you dumb?" Dariush said.
Gabriel stopped turning the numbers and turned his head upwards and glared at Dariush, "I'm not dumb."
"Dariush just shut the fuck up," I snapped at him and bent down next to Gabriel and took the lock out of his hands, "Here, let me do it," and gave him a comforting smile.
I put the code in and undid the lock and chains around the bikes.
"I want this one, it's got a 'Wakanda Forever' sticker on it," Dariush said pointing to one of the bikes.
"Wakanda forever!" I shouted doing my best T'Challa voice I could. The boys looked at me and we started laughing. The others each grabbed a helmet and walked a bike out of the shed. All of them but Alex and me.
"Lydia, why didn't you get a bike?" Alex asked me.
"Because I have a better one," I answered crossing my arms, "What about you?"
He didn't answer my question. He just looked down at his feet and put a sad expression on his face.
"Hey. What's wrong?" Gabriel asked him.
"I can't go with you," He said.
"Why not?" Gabriel asked.
"...I can't ride a bike.. I never learned," he said shamefully, his eyes never leaving the ground.
I saw Dariush throw his hands up in the air and frustratingly look away. Gabriel and ZhenZhen had a slight frustration and unimpressed look on their faces as they stared at Alex.
Alex must have seen their reactions because he then said, "It's okay. You guys can go without me."
"Cool. We out!" Dariush said without hesitation and started to walk his bike away.
"Get your fat ass back here Dariush," I growled at him and he instantly came back.
I looked over at Alex and put my blood covered hand on his shoulder, giving it a reassuring squeeze, "No one gets left behind. Even if you can't ride a bike you're still coming with us."
"But-" He started.
"But nothing," I said, "We can teach you.. Or you can ride with me," I smirked at him.
"What are you riding?" Dariush asked.
"You'll have to wait and see," I said grinning, "But first I need to change out of these clothes because I am literally soaked in blood. Go to the camp entrance with the bikes and I'll meet you there." I then walked off towards my cabin.
When I got to my cabin I opened the door and rushed over to my closet. I stripped from my clothes and put on fresh clean ones. I put my fishnet stockings and a pair of not too short ripped denim shorts over the top, I put a black cropped shirt with the Marvel logo on the front and put my bloodied gang jacket back on. I put my black converse on and my white bandanna around my head, I took my choker off and put my spiky one back on and leaving my blood covered fingerless gloves on.
Once I finished changing I went to my bookshelf and grabbed the big box of medical supplies I had stashed here. I had gotten so many injuries during my childhood and with no one to help or look after me I had to learn how to help myself. My first major wound that I had gotten was when I was in grade three, I had stood up to some fifth grade bullies that had been picking on my best friend. I had punched one in the face and kicked two others in the balls, I had tried to run from them but they caught me and beat the literal shit out of me. I had two black eyes, a split lip, a tone of cuts from being thrown onto concrete and pocket knives that they had, and three broken ribs. My parents hadn't been home for almost a month and Conrad didn't come home until four in the morning and there was no way that I would have gone to the hospital or even the nurses office at school, so I went home and looked up how to treat my injuries. From then on I had bandaged my own cuts and scrapes, healed my own broken bones and hid my bruises. It was only until I reached high school and gotten into my gang that I had some kind of medical help from others.
I opened it up and smiled when I saw that everything I needed was in here. I quickly grabbed some wipes and an antiseptic bottle, I poured some of the liquid over my wound as I wiped away the fresh and dried up blood on my stomach. I hissed as the antiseptic made contact with my open wound and stung the vulnerable skin. Once the blood was gone I grabbed out a needle and a long thread of sutures (stitches) and began threading it though my skin to close the wound. Every time the needle pierced my skin I winced as more pain struck my already aching stomach. I had managed to get the whole thing thing stitched up with one long piece of thread by tying a not at both ends. I put the needle and extra sutures down and grabbed a bandage and tape, I placed the bandage over my now cleaned and stitched up wound and put pieces of tape over the edges that I had ripped off with my teeth. I put the tape back and grabbed a big roll of bandage and wrapped it around my waste and wound. I stood up and smiled as I looked at my work.
I put all the medical supplies back in the box and threw it onto my bed, I then bent down and grabbed my black bag out from under my bed. I pulled it out and threw it onto my bed next to the medical box. I then went over to my wardrobe and pushed it over to the opposite side of the wall and looked down at the floor to see the trap door that I had built into it. I lifted the trap door in the floor boards open and scanned over the weapons I had stashed in there. I had guns, knives, bombs and other kinds of dangerous weapons in there but mainly guns because they were my favourite weapon to use. I also had some leg and arm holsters that I grabbed out and started putting on; one on my right thigh and the other on my left shoulder.
I loaded five hand guns and put twenty extra packs of bullets in my pockets and I put my knifes in my belt. I walked over to my bed and put three guns in my bag, my extra bullets, two grenades and my medical box. I then closed the trap door, slung my bag over my shoulders, grabbed my sunnies and walked out of my cabin.
No one knew I had that trap door in my cabin and I planned to keep it that way. If someone found out that I had a trap door full of guns and shit in my cabin at a camp, than I'd be completely screwed. I'd end up back in fucking Juvie in a blink of an eye, but it didn't really matter right now because I had more important things to worry about than going back to prison. I had a massive hole in the side of my stomach, I had lost a shit tone of fucking blood and probably should be dead but I'm not, and I have to travel seventy miles with a group of kids that I don't even know to save the world from fucking aliens that are invading Earth.
Yeah, prison sounded like nothing compared to what was currently happening.
I walked along the dirt pathways back towards the sheds to get my bike. I wasn't going to be riding a push bike like those idiots were, no fucking way. I was going to ride my own super awesome bike and when I reached the shed furthest from the rest, I kicked down the door and smiled widely.
There she is. She was propped up against the shed wall with my helmet hanging over the handle bar. I had a black and red dirt bike with a black helmet that had a bear skull and flames painted on it. I painted this bike and helmet myself when I was about twelve I think, and ever since I had I've been in love with it. This bike was basically my best friend.
I walked into the shed and grabbed my helmet, sitting it on top of my head, then I grabbed my bike and walked it outside the shed and into the sunlight. When I wheeled it to flat ground I got on and brang it to life. I grinned as I revved the engine, taking in the smell of the petrol and the sound of the roaring engine, remembering all the amazing times I had had on this bike. When I finished my little trip down memory lane, I put both feet on the pegs and took off at a wild speed.
As I drove through the camp on my bike I felt this massive rush hit me like a brick wall and it made me feel unstoppable and crazy. I loved it. I rode up and down slopes, doing small jumps and tricks as the rush grew and my energy levels overloaded.
When I reached the others who were all standing waiting for me I took a hard left and skidded to a stop, throwing dust and dirt at them in the process. When the dust died down I put a foot to the ground to stable myself and the bike, I took my hands off the handlebars and pulled off my helmet unintentionally dramatically, shaking my hair out of my face.
Turns out the others all got changed too but they were covered in dust again from my bike and I smirked. As I quickly scanned them and noticed that they were all staring at my bike with jealous expressions, Dariush in particular.
"'Grizzly Queen'?" Alex asked me.
My expression turned grim as I looked down at my bike and frowned. I forgot that my gang members had done that. A group of my artistic gang members had painted 'Grizzly Queen' onto the side of my bike in flaming letters. I had thought it was so cool when they had first done it but it turned out to be a bad thing in curtain situations, like this one for example.
The others didn't know that I was part of an actual gang let alone my position in the gang hierarchy, and if they found out than I'm absolutely sure that they would freak out and leave me.
I just smiled at them, "It's a nickname my school friends gave me," I half lied. It technically was a nickname that was given to me but not by my 'friends,' I had no friends, just gang members.
"That is dope as," Dariush complimented.
"Thanks Dariush," I smiled and looked at the rest of them, "Are we ready to go?"
"Yes," ZhenZhen responded and began walking out of the camp and onto the road.
I side glanced over at Gabriel who was staring at me with an unreadable expression on his face but when I looked closer, I could see a light shade of pink dusting his cheeks. I grinned at him, "Take a picture, it'll last longer," I said then walked my bike over to the others that were walking out of the camp grounds and towards the main road.
Gabriel's face had gone as red as a tomato at my comment and when he caught up to the group I could hear him mumbling to himself about how stupid he was and cute things like that that made me smile.
Shit, this guy was really getting to me and I didn't like it. I never let anyone get to me, not even cute boys like him but now he's got me smiling and calling him cute and I was disgusted and disappointed at myself for letting someone like him get to my fucking head like this. I really needed to just focus on the task at hand because if I don't I could end up dead. And I don't want to die from stupid fucking aliens.
As we got closer to the main road, Gabriel started giving out orders for how Dariush and ZhenZhen were going to ride their bikes to help Alex, I wasn't needed so I was just going to ride around the group. When he had finished giving out orders ZhenZhen grabbed Alex's wrist and gave him a look, "I won't let you fall."
It was kind of cute how they were acting, but at the same time kinda gross and I cringed.
We reached the main road and stopped to look at the sign in the middle of the dirt road that lead out to the road. In one direction it said 'High Desert' and it was pointing further up the mountain to the left. The other said 'Los Angeles' and pointed to down the hill to the right. Everyone but Dariush turned right.
After a moment of consideration and mumbling to himself, Dariush followed us.
When we go onto the road we all stopped in a line across the road and put our helmets on. I was to the right of ZhenZhen and when I turned to look at her and the others I was met with her fear filled eyes. I grinned at her and let my bike roll slowly down the slanted hill as I lifted my feet off the ground. The others followed close behind.
I put my feet lightly on the road to slow myself down a little more and came in line with Dariush, Alex and ZhenZhen. Dariush and ZhenZhen each had one hand on his shoulders and were helping him stay balanced as he rode down the hill. Alex was shaking like a leaf on his bike and had the most terrified expression on his face and it made me chuckle to myself that he was scared of riding a bike when we had fucking aliens invading our planet. What a total dork.
"You got this," Dariush said to Alex but his feet slipped off the pedals, "Put your feet back on the pedal."
"You can do this Alex," I reassured him.
"The key is to get moving," Gabriel told him as he came in line with us, "The faster you go the easier it is to stay balanced."
"Are-are you sure about this?" Alex questioned him.
"No," Gabriel said making me laugh. He looked over at me and when I looked back at him I winked and slowed down even more so I was behind the group.
"Good, you're good," Dariush complimented Alex, "now just, just keep doing that."
As Alex began to go a bit faster, ZhenZhen and Dariush released their grips on his shoulders and let him ride down the hill himself.
"I don't- I don't know if I can do this!" Alex yelled not realising that the others had let go of him.
"Alex!" ZhenZhen called out from behind him and he looked at her from over his shoulder, "You're already doing it."
He turned back around with the biggest smile on his face and we all cheered for him.
"Fuck yeah Alex! I told you, you could do it!" I shouted to him from behind.
We all began to cheer and stuff around, doing tricks on our bikes and having fun. I had driven in front of them and done skids, small jumps, riding a little up the side of the hill, even driving backwards. I had gone down this road so many times that I knew every turn, bump and pothole in the road and over time I had made a ramp on the edge of the road that I went down every time. I had almost caused so many car accidents that I got band from my bike for about year once by the police, but that never stopped me.
So when we turned a corner I knew that the ramp was around the next turn. I sped up my bike, going faster than the rest of them, I popped a wheelie along the way making them all cheer. I skidded around the corner and finally saw the ramp.
"Check this out mother fuckers!" I shouted to them and sped up even more.
The ramp was on a bend in the road and to do it I had to drive off the edge and onto a dirt track in the bush that I had made, I had to drive down it until another corner in the road, than go up another ramp to get back onto the road.
As I sped up the others started freaking out when they realised that I wasn't going to turn. They screamed out for me to stop but I just ignored them hopefully making my trick even more awesome once they saw what it was. When I hit the ramp I flew five metres in the air over tree tops and as I felt the wind hit my face and the ground getting closer, I cheered, "Whoooooo!"
The track I had made off road was blocked by trees so anyone that tried to see where I went wouldn't be able to, so when the others jumped off their bikes and ran to look over the railing for me they panicked, probably thinking that I had gotten injured or killed. But I just kept riding.
I road down the thin and bumpy dirt track and came to the part where I had to speed up if I wanted to make the jump, so I sped up going as fast as I could. I went so fast that I flew almost twenty metres in the air, and it was just enough for me to do a flip.
When the others turned their heads and saw my flip they cheered and got back on their bikes to follow me down the rest of the hill. I slowed down a bit waiting for them to catch up and when they did they started praising me.
"Holy shit Lydia! That was so fucking awesome!" Dariush shouted to me and we high-fived.
"That was so cool!" Gabriel said.
"I know right?! It took me ages to perfect it but hey! I did it without crashing this time! And I even managed a fucking flip too!" I shouted to them with pure joy.
It was true, I haven't been able to get that jump right for ages and every time did it I crashed and almost caused a car accident. But I must have had some kind of super adrenaline rush because that was one of the craziest things that I've ever pulled off. But I pulled it off and it was absolutely insane!
"Wait what?! That's the first time you've done that jump right?!" Alex asked me in disbelief.
"Yeah! But it was bloody fantastic!" I shouted and we continued having fun riding down the mountain.
"This is so much fun yo-!" Alex started to say as he looked over his shoulder to us but was cut short by hitting the barricade. He fell forward off the bike and landed in the dirt on the other side of the barricade. We all hurried over to him to see if he was okay.
"Oh shit," I said as I jumped off my bike and over the barricade, ready to give him medical help.
"Alex!" ZhenZhen shouted as we all surrounded him, "Are you okay?"
"Yo, is he dead?" Dariush asked and I slapped the back of his head.
"No he's not dead you twat!" I said to him. He looked like he had just regained consciousness as he groggily opened his eyes, but there didn't seem to be any serious injuries. So I stood up and walked over and leaned on the barricade waiting for him to get up.
"Alex? You okay?" Gabriel asked as he crouched down in front of Alex and next to ZhenZhen.
"You okay?" ZhenZhen asked him again as he sat up but didn't respond. He was staring at something over the mountain edge and as I followed his gaze my jaw dropped in shock.
ZhenZhen was the next to see what he was looking at, "Holy shit.." She said.
"Yeah like holy.." Dariush said not realising what everyone was now looking at until the end of his sentence, "shit.."
It was Los Angeles, except it wasn't. It had almost been completely destroyed. Sky scrapers had fallen, smoke was everywhere in the air all around it from explosions that you could still hear, surrounding it like a dome. There were more jets and alien ships still flying around everywhere fighting, causing more destruction and chaos every second. The more you looked, the more damage you could see.
"Is that where we're going?" Dariush asked us with a shocked and scared voice.
"Yeah.." I responded.
Well shit.
>*< >*< >*< Time Skip >*< >*< >*<
We rode as fast as we could the rest of the way down the mountain to the city in silence, only hearing each other’s ragged breathing as we pedalled, the beating of our racing hearts, and the distant but ever growing sound of explosions and gunfire coming from the city. When we got there we slowed to a stop, got off our bikes and walked them down the streets of a destroyed Los Angeles. All the streets were covered in trash, broken parts of buildings, concrete, dirt, even the nose of a fucking plane was on one of the sidewalks. There were cars, buildings and debris on fire and there was smoke everywhere, filling every inch of our lungs making it hard to breathe. We could still hear the explosions and gunfire coming from a curtain area of the city but it grew louder as we got closer.
When we reached the end of a street Dariush broke the silence that we had been walking in, "There," he said, pointing to a police station a few burning buildings away.
As we walked faster towards the station Dariush spoke again, "Man this place is trashed," he said stating the obvious.
"Looks empty," Alex said.
We walked towards a large tree that was planted in front of the station and Gabriel started to talk, "Guys, I don't think... nobody's uhh..." We all stopped walking and turned to look at him.
"What?" Dariush asked him confused at his sudden stutter and slightly agitated.
Gabriel took off his helmet and looked down at his feet, "You guys go ahead. I'll just stay back and watch our bikes."
I was slightly confused by his words. Thoughts of why he wouldn't want to go into the police station rampaged through my head. Maybe he's done something bad or broken a law or something, he could have a relative that worked here and maybe passed away or didn't like, or maybe he just didn't like police stations, I don't fucking now. But I'm pretty sure it's probably because he's gotten in trouble with the law, it seems like the most obvious explanation. But for some reason these thoughts made my stomach flutter and my curiosity spike. I didn't like it.
I came to the conclusion that it was because he's gotten himself in trouble by the police before so I just went with it. I smiled, "Okay," I said and propped my bike up against the tree and putting my helmet on the handlebar, "You touch my bike and I will kill you," I threatened him and began to walk into the station.
I wasn't a big fan of walking into here either but because of all the shit I've done, I basically live here. I know the place like the back of my hand I've been here that many times. But since everyone was evacuated I was guessing that no cops would be in here so I was a bit relaxed.
But Dariush had to be a dickhead and make the situation harder than it needed to be, "Wait, What?" He asked, "Oh yeah because the aliens want to jack our mountain bikes," he said with sarcasm basically dripping from his mouth.
"No because there could be looters that might take them," I defended Gabriel, "and with a dirt bike like mine they wouldn't think twice about taking it."
"Yeah, someone should stay and watch," Alex said looking to Gabriel.
He looked between the three of us and sighed, "Whatever man," Dariush said and dropped his bike.
We walked into the deserted police station and began searching the place. It was completely dark because the power was out but other than there being no one here and the power out, everything looked normal which was kind of weird considering the damage that's been done to the rest of the city.
I was at the front of the group since I knew this place so well and led them into the main office at the back of the entry and waiting area, where the office lead to a meeting room, more smaller offices and a cell large room. I ignored the conversation the others were having and walked straight into the cell room to check if the cops had left anyone there, but and what I saw almost didn't surprise me at all. Almost.
"Well, well, well. If it isn't little Louey Pooey," I said as I walked around the cell and faced the man sitting on the metal bench inside it.
The figure stood up at my sudden entry and walked over to the cell bars into the light. He was an ugly piece of shit I had to admit, but the fact that the cops had left him here instead of evacuating him when there was an alien invasion happening right outside was actually quite funny.
"Lydia.." He growled, "What the fuck are you doing here you little bitch?"
"Oh you know, just walking by. Thought I might come for a visit to see who the cops had left to die by the aliens and guess who I found?" I said smiling innocently which only made him angry.
"Lydia! Who are you talking to?" Alex asked as he walked into the room not noticing Lou until he came and stood next to me. He yelled in fright at the sight of an angry man glaring at me through cell bars and it just made me smirk.
"Hey there kiddo," Lou said to him, hiding the hatred for me as he talked to Alex. He was probably going to try and get him to let him out, but there was no way in a million years that I would let that happen.
"Who is this?" Alex asked me.
"This Alex, is what I like to call a Sewer Rat. An Ugly, smelly creature that survives by feeding off scraps and backstabbing his friends and allies," I told Alex not taking my eyes off Lou.
"We were never friends you stupid bitch," He snapped at me, not caring anymore about Alex being in the room.
"No, you’re right. We weren't friends. We were basically family," I spat the last part with pure hatred, "And you, like any other pathetic wanker, had to go and stab me in the back, both literally and metaphorically. You betrayed us. You betrayed me. And you ran away like the coward you are before I could rip you to shreds."
Dariush was walking into the room now, looking frantic and rambling on about something that he found in one of the offices, but he didn't notice Lou until he stood next to me like Alex did, "Oh shit!"
"Who are these kids Lydia? New members of your pathetic excuse of a gang? Or just some kids that you've manipulated and are going to ditch the second you don't need them anymore?" Lou asked me and my body stiffened.
"Gang? What gang?" Dariush asked making Lou's facial expression turned from anger to surprise.
"You haven't told them.. have you?" He asked me.
"No, I haven't but it doesn't matter because they have nothing to do with it, any of it. So shut your hole before I cut your fucking throat open and you bleed to death," I snarled at him.
"Well it looks to me like you'll bleed out before I would," He said nodding to my stomach wound. I looked down and saw that blood had already managed to leak though the thick layers of bandages and onto part of my shirt and shorts.
Shit. I must have gotten a huge adrenaline rush from doing that awesome jump on the road that I didn't even notice that it had started bleeding again. I hope the stitches haven't broken and it hasn't opened back up, but now that Lou had brought my attention to my wound the pain started to come back and I slightly winced.
I put my hand on top of my wound and looked back to Lou, "I'm fine you stupid shithead," I said but I could see Alex and Dariush's concerned looks that they gave me out of the corner of my eyes.
"You don't look fine. I mean your face is almost completely white, you've got sweat dripping all over you and you can barely even keep your eyes open. From those symptoms I'm going to take a guess that you got stabbed, you stitched it back up but it didn't work, it's infected and you've lost a tone of blood because even though you've bandaged it it's still bleeding. Am I right?" He said with the biggest grin.
I didn't answer him though, I only glared at his ugly face. He grinned wider at my reaction and looked over to the boys, "What's your name kid?" He asked Dariush.
"I ain't telling you shit," Dariush said, "If Lydia hates you than I ain't saying nothing bitch."
"This must be the dickhead of the group if he's too scared to talk because of you. So what did you do to him this time? Have you beaten him? Broken some of his bones? Cut him? Threatened to kill his family and friends? When are you ever going to show some kind of compassion or love to anyone Lydia? Because if you think about it, you're basically a heartless monster. You should try and find yourself a guy," Lou said to me with a wink at the end.
My breathing was getting faster and heavy as I began to panic and rage with every word that came out of his filthy mouth. Lou always managed to find a way to get into my head and I hated it. No one else affected me with words like this mother fucker did and it made me want to rip his head off because he knew what it did to me. He knew exactly what buttons to press and he knew every reaction each button would give him when he pressed it. I hated it, I hated him and I hated myself.
I was ready to beat the living daylights out of him when suddenly ZhenZhen walked into the room, "What's going on?"
"And there's a third! Wow Lydia! I didn't think you would stoop this low after everything you've done back at school." Lou exclaimed and chuckled.
"Shut. the fuck. up." I growled at him through gritted teeth as I clenched my fist at my sides.
"Who is this man Lydia?" ZhenZhen asked.
"He's a nobody. A disgusting piece of shit that beat and raped the kids at my school because he was a senior and he thought that he could do whatever the fuck he wanted to us!" I stormed over to the cell, grabbed the collar of his shirt and smashed his face against the bars of the cell, "You're a disgraceful cockhead that only thinks and cares about yourself and your horny ass dick! You tricked me and everyone else in believing that you were our friend, our family, and then you suddenly beat, killed and raped us whenever you fucking felt like it!"
Gabriel suddenly ran into the room, worry plastered onto his features and as he looked at the scene in front of him, he began to worry even more, "What's happening? Why-"
"Get out of here Gabriel!" I shouted to him, not taking my hate filled eyes off of the man in front of me.
"Lydia-" he began again.
"I said get the fuck out of here!" I shouted even louder this time.
"I think we should all go," ZhenZhen said and she pulled the boys out of the room so it was just me and Lou.
"So I was wrong. You can feel compassion. Turns out I didn't completely fuck you up," He said and I knew what he was talking about but I was never going to admit it, especially not to him.
"Oh you fucked me up alright," I snarled at him, "And because of how fucking fucked up you made me I bet you can guess what I'm going to do to you, can't you?"
"What? You gonna fuck me and beat shit out of me like I did to you and the rest of that pathetic school?" he said.
"If I were you I'd savour these last few minutes you have a fucking dick," I said and I pulled out one of my knifes from my jacket.
"Let's have some fun shall we?"
>*< >*< >*< Time Skip >*< >*< >*<
When I walked out of the cell room and out of the police station I saw the others standing at the tree with our bikes. They were having another argument and were all shouting at each other. I could here every single word that they each said and it made my stomach twist inside me when I realised what the argument was about.
"She's insane!" Dariush shouted.
"We can't just leave her," Gabriel said.
"She's the best chance we have at surviving," Alex said.
"Yeah?! Well from the sounds of that man screaming in extreme pain, I'm pretty sure she just killed him!" Dariush shouted.
"But did you hear what she said about him?!" Alex shouted, "She said that he raped and beat her! Even worse she said that he did it to other kids too!"
"Well it explains why she's fucked up!" Dariush shouted.
When I heard Dariush say that last part I froze in place as my feelings hit me like a brick wall. ZhenZhen had realised my presence and silenced the boys and they all looked at me. I stopped had few metres away from them and stared at each of their faces. Gabriel had missed the scene in the cell room so when he heard Alex say that I was raped and beat by Lou his face turned pale in shock and his jaw dropped so low I thought it was going to touch the ground. Dariush looked absolutely terrified at this point and was shaking in fear at what I would do to him after hearing what he had said about me. Alex looked both scared and concerned and ZhenZhen had a pokerface on so I couldn't read her expressions or emotions very well.
I looked down at my feet and started speaking, "If you guys don't want me to come with you anymore I understand," I said and sighed, "I know that you guys think I'm some insane dangerous killer and to be honest I'm starting to believe it myself but.. but I understand if you don't want me to come with you and I promise I won't hurt you or anything if you do because I understand why you wouldn't want me with you."
I waited for their replies and when none of them spoke I felt tears begin to gather in my eyes but I tried my hardest to push them away, "Please say something.."
"Is.. Is what that guy in the station said true?" Alex asked, "Is all the things you said true too?"
I nodded my head in confirmation, "I've been through a lot in my childhood. I've had unspeakable things happen to me and I done horrible things that no child should even have to think about doing and I'm not proud what I've done, if anything I wish I could take it all back and die before any of it happened." I said and a stray tear ran down my cheek, "Because if I had the chance to take it all back and start over I would," my voice cracked and I wiped away the tear on my cheek tying even harder not to let any more of the bastards slip through.
I closed my eyes and hugged my torso, "So it's fine if you don't want me-"
I was suddenly cut off as Gabriel attacked me with a massive bear hug. He squeezed me tightly and I brought my hands away from my torso and wrapped them tighter around his waist as I put my head in the crook of his neck and began to sob. God I've wanted this for so long, to feel the comfort of another person, to hug someone and never want to let go, to cry on someone's shoulder as they held me in their arms and comforted me. It felt so good to finally feel some of the things that I've wanted to feel for most of my life and to not even care that I was showing them so much emotion and vulnerability.
Alex then walked over and hugged both of us in a side hug on my right, then ZhenZhen joined on the left and then Dariush joined where ever he could fit. I cried for what felt like hours until I calmed down and after a moment of silence and we were all just hugging, Gabriel whispered into my ear, "We would never leave you Lydia, no matter how bad your past was and the things you've done. We would never leave you. I would never leave you." And with those words I started to cry again, making my stomach fill with agony and pain.
After another long moment of silence as I cried, I finally calmed down again and pulled away from the others. I sniffed and wiped away the tears on my face as I looked at them, "thank you.." I said.
"No problem," Alex said.
"Not to be mean or anything but we should get moving," ZhenZhen said to us, "We need to get that key to someone as quickly as possible." We all nodded in agreement and got back on our bikes and put our helmets back on.
We rode further and further into the city looking for anyone that was still here so we could give them the key and then head to safety away from the aliens. We rode in silence listening to the sound of explosions and gunfire that were so loud we all jumped every time we heard it and smelling the horrid smoke that surrounded us. We occasionally starting small conversions here and there but not talking for too long before it went silent again.
I was riding at the back of the group, thinking about the things that had happened at the police station when Gabriel slowed down and came in line with me.
He looked at me with concern in his brown eyes, "are you okay?" He asked quietly.
"No." I responded, not looking at him, "I never have been... but I've survived this long, might as well keep going."
"What did that man do to you?" Gabriel asked me making my blood boil and my mood worsen. Did he not listen to anything that was said outside that police station?! The fucking prick had the decency to ask me that question when he had already been told that I was raped and beaten by a man that they all know that I killed back in the police station. Maybe Dariush was right back at the bike shed, maybe he was just plain old fucking dumb.
I wanted to push him off his bike and into the alley wall, but I just huffed angrily, "The fact that you're asking me what he did to me when you were clearly told that he raped and beat me, is a real dickhead move."
"I-I'm sorry I didn't mea-" He started but I cut him off.
"Save it. I don't need your pity," I snapped and he went quiet again. We rode in silence again for another few minutes before he spoke again.
"You know you can trust me right?" Gabriel said to me and my expression turned even grimmer.
From all the lies he's told us, I didn't, but it wasn't just that. I've always had trouble trusting people and letting them get close to me but that was how I survived most of my life. I've only trusted myself but sometimes I didn't trust myself, and when I did trust someone, they took advantage of it and hurt me. After that I never trusted anyone, not even my gang. But these guys had somehow managed to break down some of my walls without even trying and even though I've shown them weakness I still didn't trust them. I know that I have way more secrets and have told way more lies to more people than he has but it was different somehow and I just didn't trust him. I wanted to, but I didn't.
When I didn't respond to him he rode closer to my bike and put his left hand on top of my right that was resting no my bike's handlebar, "you can trust me Lydia," He said, but I just frowned and sped up to go further ahead, letting his hand slip from on top of mine, still not looking at him.
As we rode further and further into the broken city, ZhenZhen decided to brake the awkward silence that we had suddenly come to be riding in, "How is your watch still working after the pulse?" She asked Alex as we turned down a dark alleyway full of who knows what.
"It's not electronic, it's mechanical," He answered and brought his left wrist off the handlebar and over his right arm to show her it the best he could in the awkward position he was in, almost crashing into the wall in the process.
"Yo. Watch out," Dariush said to Alex from behind them and he steadied the bike again.
"It was my dad's," He said continuing his conversation with ZhenZhen, "He uhh.."
"Gave it to you?" she asked cautiously.
"..Yeah.. He gave it to me," Alex said but from all the emotion in his voice, told me that he was lieing but the emotion also told me that something bad had happened and it wasn't just given to him by his dad. I frowned sadly and felt bad for Alex. He didn't deserve anything bad like losing a parent, he was too much of a cinnamon roll.
After what happened at the police station, my mood had dropped from 'normal bad ass emo' to 'sad and depressed cow' in a matter of seconds. I never showed this much emotion to people before and the fact that I was currently making them think that I'm some depressed kid with the fucked up childhood, wasn't a good thing. In fact, it was a horrible thing and I need to get a grip and show them my strong side because power didn't come from weakness, fear did, and if they didn't fear me then I had no chance of having their respect. I needed their respect if I was going to survive this insane situation.
While I was mentally scolding myself I could faintly hear Dariush complimenting Alex on how good he was at riding his bike. I had to admit, it was a nice to hear Dariush being kind and supportive for once instead of being the spoilt rich dick he usually was, but at the same time kind of weird and I mentally cringed. As we turned the corner and emerged from the alleyway out onto the sunlit and smoked filled street, three large speeding green cars almost ran us over.
"Oh shit!" I shouted as I fell off my bike onto my wounded side and I hissed as another wave of pain went through my body. My bike had fallen on top of my legs, trapping me underneath and as I used my arms to lift the bike up and crawl out from underneath it, I shoved my helmet off and gabbed at my stomach wound, looking around for the others.
They had jumped off their bikes and ran out into the middle of the street to try and get whoever was driving the cars that nearly killed us, to stop. I quickly got to my feet and ran over to them, yelling for them to shut up, when suddenly a voice filled the air.
"Stay where you are! Do not move!" It yelled at us from behind, making everyone but me freeze.
On instinct, I quickly spun around, grabbing my gun from my leg holster and aimed it at the person closest to us. When I got a good look at the person I had my gun aimed at I tensed up. He was a fucking military soldier, most likely a captain and there was also a whole army force stationed behind him.
Well fuck! This was just great! The fucking military was here! I'm so fucking screwed!
"Put down the gun Grizzly Queen and surrender yourself! If you do that, than we might let you live!"
CHAPTER 1 - CHAPTER 2 - CHAPTER 3 - CHAPTER 4 - CHAPTER 5 - CHAPTER 6
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Undercover Wild Cat, Chapter Twelve
Description: Sasha finds herself interning with Hawks! She gets hero experience and has done tough questions to deal with along the way.
Author's Thoughts: Just a chapter showing what Sasha's internship was like!
OC Credit: @jix-the-dragon
Art Credit: @.jabberwockyface
<<< ♡ >>>
“You’ve got to be kidding me. I can’t believe I’m here.”
Sasha stood there in her hotel room, staring down the winged hero who she’d be interning for. “I’ve been seeing too much of you lately.”
“Well, that’s for work.” Hawks grinned casually. “This time, we’ll have fun. We’ll put away bad guys and save people just like heroes.”
She placed her bag on the bed, opening it to unpack her things. “I’m all for kicking ass and stuff. But this is kinda unnecessary. I’ll never be a hero anyway.” She sighed.
She frowned as soon as the statement left her mouth. She really didn’t like the sound of that. After spending weeks with her classmates and learning how to be a hero, she found herself fantasizing about it. Not having to hide, not having to go through agent training, not having to take lives.
Being able to be honest with her friends.
“Friends..” She thought. She never thought she’d call anyone her friends. And look at her now. A high school student with friends who walked her home.
A high school student with a crush.
A high school student.
The thought of leaving that all behind… It upset her, she could admit. And though she was taught to train her emotions, Hawks could see it. Maybe it was the experience, maybe he just understood, but he saw it.
“Do you really wanna be an agent, kid?” He asked, leaning against the doorframe. It wasn’t often Hawks got very serious, but there he was. There was no smile, no playful spark in his eyes. No teasing in his voice, nothing.
It caught her off guard seeing him like this sometimes. She could only imagine how he felt when she went from being a cold agent to a warm UA student. Or how her classmates would feel were they to witness something like that. Nonetheless, she answered, shaking her head dismissively.
“I chose this life, Hawks. When I was a little girl, I knew what I was getting into. I still haven’t completed my goal anyway.” Her response was uniform, and it didn’t answer his question. Hawks expected that though, he often was able to do the same thing. It came with the territory. That didn’t mean he was gonna let it go just yet though.
“That’s not what I asked. You aren’t just a little girl anymore and you’ll complete your goal sooner or later. Then what? Do you want to be an agent?”
Sasha remained quiet for a while, choosing to instead not answer. Another tactic from the commission. “If lying doesn’t work, shut up”. That’s what they were told.
“Fine. But your silence says a million things.” He chuckled, walking over to the balcony. He opened the food, the wind immediately entering the room and lightly blowing at his hair.
Sasha could feel the room get less tense as his seriousness faded. She couldn’t help but admire how just a change of emotion could affect someone. When he got stern, it felt almost suffocating. Even if he had said nothing with her back turned to him, she’d know he was bothered.
Hawks hoisted himself on the balcony railing. “We start tomorrow, kid. I’ll text you the directions, so just don’t be late.” With a lazy grin, he was gone.
She let out a sigh she didn’t know she was holding back. “He’s so frustrating..” She grumbled, going back to unpacking. “That’s such a weird question. Who actually wants to be an agent anyway? It’s just a last resort for most people anyway..”
Walking over to the balcony door, she stood there for a moment, letting the cool air travel over her skin. Staring off in the direction Hawks flew in, she had a sudden thought. This thought would bug her until she finally found sleep.
“I wonder why Hawks is an agent?”
~~~
Sasha was surprised. She was actually learning quite a bit on this internship, both about Hawks and being a hero.
First, Hawks was fast. She knew he was fast, but she didn’t realize just how fast he moved until she worked with him. Of course, she was fast too, especially with her quirk, but Hawks was on a whole other level. While she may not have been as fast, she was thankfully able to keep up just enough to not lose him.
Second, Hawks could do a lot with his feathers. There were things she saw him lift with his feathers that heroes would physically struggle with. His ability to use his feathers as a sword was another thing. He was amazing, especially with his swordsmanship. She had started to consider using a weapon herself, maybe a dagger?
Third, being a hero was extremely demanding. There was always someone who needed help, someone was needed saving. She didn’t know what she should have expected though, especially working with the number three hero.
Fourth, and lastly, being a hero was actually very rewarding. She couldn't really explain it. She helped people from the shadows all the time, but doing it in the light and seeing their faces was something else…
“Thank you! Thank you!”
Sasha looked owlishly at the woman before her, handing her the child she’d quickly saved from some rubble. The woman hugged her son close before pulling Sasha in too, sniffling and crying tears of relief and gratitude.
“Oh! No problem.. He looks fine, but please get him to a medic who could tell you better than I could..” Sasha said, rubbing the woman’s back in an attempt to calm her.
The young boy looked up at Sasha in amazement. “... Who are you?”
Before she could answer, Hawks called out to her. “Yo, Namir! Let’s get going, no time to waste!” He grinned, crossing his arms and flying off.
Sasha sighed, stepping back from the two. “Duty calls. Please be safe.” She smiled and immediately ran after Hawks, scaling buildings and running along rooftops just to keep track of the flying hero's location.
The boy looked up at his mother smiling. “She’s a hero, Mama!”
“Yes. Yes, she is, sweetheart!”
~~~
“Finally!” Sasha sighed, leaning back. She and Hawks sat at the top of a skyscraper with bento boxes in their laps. “I didn’t realize your schedule was so full. How do you do it?”
He chuckled, shrugging lazily. “I make time. Someone could die if I don’t. Being a hero is a lot of responsibility, just like being an agent.”
“I see that.. But why does it feel so different?” She mused aloud, looking up thoughtfully.
“Because we haven’t killed anyone in a shady alleyway.”
He said it with a smile, laughing even. But he was right. They hadn’t had to take anyone out. They focused more on being saviors than being exterminators.
“Have you ever killed anyone?” She asked, looking at Hawks curiously. She could certainly see him doing it, but she knew better than to assume.
He didn’t give her an answer though.
“That’s mighty personal,” He said, biting into a chicken tender. “Have you?”
She chose to remain in silence. Of course, she had, not that she could tell anyone. Naomasa didn’t even know. If he had, Sasha was sure he’d either demand for her to quit or disown her. The commission was always ready to take in orphans, but she loved Naomasa. Her parents entrusted her to him.
She hated to keep secrets, but she just couldn’t tell the truth.
“Are we really good guys?” She looked down at her lunch, lightly picking at it. “Or are we just pretending?”
Hawks looked at her with an unreadable expression before sighing. “It’s a grey area, Kid. I wish I could give you a real answer, but I can’t. Depends on who you ask honestly.”
“Well, I’m asking you, Hawks.” She looked over at him. “What do you think?”
He chose his words carefully before speaking. “Kind of. Especially when you’ve got a good reason and no other way.”
She huffed. “That’s such a bad response. You never give me a straight answer.” She shoved an octopus sausage in her mouth, rolling her eyes at the sound of Hawks’ laughter.
“And you didn’t give me an answer at all when I asked if this was the life you really wanted. Answer my question and I’ll answer one of yours.”
“No way! And stop eating with your mouth full!” She scolded.
He laughed. “C’mon, tell me something!”
“...”
“Cat got your tongue again, Kid?”
“You are just the worst.”
~~~
“I’m fine, Naomasa.”
“Are you sure? I can swing by your hotel and bring you a couple of things.”
It was every night that they spoke on the phone. They had both lived together and cared for each other for so long that it was hard to get used to their absences.
“No, I’m fine. Thanks though. How are things at home?”
Naomasa sighed. “Quiet. Very different. I’m not used to you being gone yet. I have no clue what I’ll do when you move out.”
“What do you mean? I’ll never move out. You’re stuck with me forever.” She chuckled, patting dry her face after shaving just washed it. She looked into the mirror, pouting as she noticed a bruise on her cheek. Hero work hurt sometimes.
“Good. Someone needs to remind me to eat when I’m swamped with work.”
“Speaking of which-”
“Yes, Sasha, I saw your text earlier and I had lunch. I’m sure you’re busy with Hawks though, you don’t need to worry about me.”
Sasha smiled. “I’ll always worry about you. Someone has to, you know.”
“Oh yes, because you are the parent.”
“Yes, and you are the grown man on the force who forgets to eat lunch and still falls asleep on the couch.” She teased, sitting at her bed and laying back.
“Yeah, yeah..” He grumbled.
“Oh, and we can’t forget that one time I did our laundry and-”
“My underwear is normal, Sasha.”
“Sure. Hey, when would you even wear purple heart-eye emoji boxers?” She laughed, grinning wide at the memory. That was definitely a good day for her.
“Yeah, yeah. Well, what about you? Having fun?”
Her laughter died down with a content sigh. “Mhm. Hawks is pretty weird, but he’s a good man and I’ve learned a lot from him. And helping people during the day is really nice since I don’t have to be so careful.”
“Good.. I’m glad. Listen Sash, I gotta go. I’m actually visiting someone tonight.”
Her eyebrows raised in curiosity. “Got a date with a special lady?”
“A date? No, no. I’m far too busy for that.” He chuckled. “But I am meeting up with someone special to me.”
“Okay. Goodnight, Nao. Love you.”
“I love you too. Goodnight.”
With that, she hung up. She always felt relaxed after talking with Naomasa at night. There was a sense of familiarity with every call. She felt much less alone.
“... He’s so lucky to have me.” She mused to herself, staring at the ceiling above her.
A few minutes later, there was a knock at the door. It was a bit late, so she wasn’t expecting anyone. She figured it was probably Hawks coming to annoy her with a surprise patrol. It wouldn’t be the first time.
Sighing, she stood and walked over to the door, swinging it open. “Hawks, no more midnight patrols-!” She cut herself off, taken aback by the sight before her.
There stood Naomasa with a tupperware container in hand. “Midnight patrols? Do I have to have a talk with the number three hero?” He rose an eyebrow.
She smiled, hugging him tightly. “Nao! Oh my gosh, you’re here! Why are you here?” She looked up at him.
He put a hand on her head, lightly ruffling her hair. “Well, I made some of my famous steak last night and accidentally made a second helping for you. I didn’t want to put it to waste.”
She grinned, grabbing the container from him excitedly. “You brought your steak?”
Naomasa smiled down at the girl before him fondly. She was staying at a 5-star hotel, a hotel that probably served food prepared much better than he ever could. But there she was, still gushing over some steak he made at home.
“Someone’s excited.” He chuckled, shaking his head. “You do love steak though. What’d I expect?”
”No, no. I love your steak! It’s my absolute favorite! I missed it!” Her eyes seemed to sparkle at the steak in her hands. Then they lifted to meet his. “And I miss home.”
The two talked for a bit more. Catching up in person was a lot better than talking over the phone. From the joyful smiles to the embarrassed expressions from teasing.
Naomasa couldn’t stay too long. He had work and Sasha had interning. So the two parted ways, Sasha trying to insist on walking him to the entrance of the hotel.
“C’mon, just let me walk you!” She sighed, pulling away from their farewell hug.
Naomasa shook his head. “You should just get some rest, Sasha. Besides, if you walk me out, how will I know that you got to your room safely?”
She sighed. “A text, Nao, I’ll send a text.” She crossed her arms.
“Not good enough for me.” He ruffled her hair once more. “I’ll see you when you come home, alright? And really, let me know if I need to speak to HAwks.”
She couldn’t help but laugh. “I’m fine, you don’t have to get all angry parent on him. I love you, Nao. Goodnight, for real this time.”
“I love you too, Sasha. Goodnight.. For real this time.”
#bnha#mha#my hero academia#boku no hero academia#x oc#oc x eijirou kirishima#writing commissions#eijirou kirishima#eijiro kirishima
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waves that hurt | k.bakugou + i.midoriya.
♡ pairing: katsuki bakugou x gn!reader x izuku midoriya.
♡ word count: 3.04K
♡ rating: everyone.
♡ genre: pro hero!au, hurt, angst and comfort.
♡ summary: dark days mean dark waves that crash across your mind, intrusive and mean the waves pull you under— but they are the helping hands that pull you up and let you breathe.
♡ warning(s): please read ! heavy tw for depression, intrusive thoughts and self depreciation, self doubt and low self-worth. this fic is written mostly from personal experiences and may not be accurate to how everyone feels! mentions of therapy.
♡ author’s note(s): this is my contribution to @doinmybesthere ‘s mental health awareness collab, this is kinda personal to me and something i experienced recently!! i hope it can provide some comfort to anyone out there, please don’t forget to check out everyone else’s works and i hope you’re all safe ‘n well <3
♡ masterlist | requests | kofi
“kacchan, it’s much worse this time, i really think you should come home early tonight.”
deku whispers into the phone, his marred hands rub slow and soothing circles into your back from over the duvet— you can feel his warmth, light and airy through it but he feels and sounds much further away. a million miles across a dark ocean that trickles through your thoughts, intrusive and mean, keeping you under and away from clear air.
you wouldn’t want to pull him into this, bother him with the way you drown in dark thoughts— so you pull away from your boyfriend and tuck yourself away into the sheets.
izuku doesn’t retract his hand even as you pull away, listening to katsuki grunt orders down the phone— make sure yn’s eaten, make sure yn’s had water. basic things you should be able to do on your own but can’t, paralysed by the anxiety and depression that clamps down on you like a vice and refuses to let you up so you can just breathe. you want to breathe and not feel like the world is crashing down on you, to have a second to yourself where everything seems like it’s okay.
brushing fingers over the nape of your neck, toying with the coils of your baby hairs, your boyfriend speaks, only gently. “baby,” says quietly, his weight causing the bed to dip. “katsuki will be home soon, do you want to come with me to let him in?” you shrug, a sick feeling twisting in your gut. you see the black tendrils and waves in the back of your mind, bringing forth a new batch of ugly words that force you down. are you really that much of a burden these days that katsuki has to call it quits on work for you? “how are you feeling?”
you don’t know, you don’t know how to tell him that every thought you have hurts and there’s a pain in your chest with every breath you take. “i don’t know, it’s just...bad izu…” you want to explain how you feel deep inside, but the words are trapped like balls of tar in your throat— fear that if you say something he’ll walk away.
“you don’t have to say anything, don’t force yourself to…” he speaks with a soft voice, cotton to your ears in an attempt to soothe you. you can just about feel the clean air flowing through your lungs at the sound— it tells you he loves you, no matter what and you almost believe it before sinking back under. “let’s get you some water okay? wouldn’t want kacchan scolding us would we?”
the joke hangs in the murky and heavy air for a few seconds before you muster a small smile— your green haired boyfriend lets out a tiny sigh of relief and pressed a kiss into your hairline, the affection simmers under your skin and briefly brings light to your dark mind as izuku starts leading you to the kitchen.
you’re curled up in izuku’s lap when the front door pops open with a click— signifying your other boyfriend had arrived home. you flinch, hiding yourself in the blankets keeping you warm and locking away the dark thoughts from the eyes of your lovers.
part of you hated them seeing you this way, that’s why you forced yourself to keep everything away from them— but they knew, they always did and always came to your rescue. you didn’t want them to feel like they had to look after you when the days were bad and draining and your mind took hold of everything that you felt. you didn’t need the weight of your own problems on the shoulders of two pro heroes who had enough to deal with.
in the end, you would destroy them like you did with yourself.
you can hear katsuki shedding his gear by the door, feeling his intense and heated presence flood the room and barely penetrate the barrier you created for yourself even while you lay in izuku’s arms. for as long as you’d known the two— even from back in your U.A days, bakugou had hated self-pity, of course in recent years he’d cooled down a little and spoke less on the actions of others but even still, you weren’t sure if you could handle him looking down on you for looking down on yourself and for feeling this way.
the blanket is suddenly lifted from your head, momentarily blinding you with the overwhelming light that is your boyfriend, katsuki bakugou. a twinkle of concern lines his ruby eyes and you can see traces of his charcoal eyeliner that he usually smudges underneath his mask— he’s so beautiful but you’re afraid of the twitches of worry, afraid that he’s mad at you for being the way you are.
“hey honey,” bakugou hums, crouching to your level to cup your cheeks, stress bleeding from his body when you nuzzle into him.
izuku gives you a squeeze, an encouraging one and you nod. “hi,” is all you can muster, afraid of blurting the intrusive words that crackle across your brain.
katsuki sits back on his haunches, looking between you and his boyfriend before he attempts to kick off his shoes. the room is full of a thick, ugly quietness that you know you’re responsible for— they don’t have to say anything, you know that it’s you. because when you’re like this it’s hard for bakugou and midoriya to talk, afraid that they’ll say something to set you off and you afraid that they’ll leave if they knew how you really felt. how trapped and alone you felt inside, how the twisted darkness added tones to your vibes and dragged you down with every step that you took.
they don’t need to say it because it flows from your body like a rushing river and drowns them, fills their lungs and it’s your fault for infecting them with your own bitter taste of life.
“have you eaten?” the blonde of the two boys asks, looking you dead in the eye. you want to answer, but again the viscous back from earlier starts to flood through your body. you try to take care of yourself of these days where you feel it the hardest, but it’s difficult to move and to breathe— and the drive to complete even the simplest of tasks is barely ever there.
you move to speak, caught up in the thick smog of your own brain when izuku gives your body a squeeze and shakes his head, the forest of his hair brushing against your cheek. “you’ve had water, right?” izuku has no problem answering for you. “but nothing to eat,” he whispers, keeping his voice low as if to hide his worry from you— it’s light in his tone but tremors throughout the number one’s body. you feel sick for making him feel that way.
katsuki’s gaze shifts back from his boyfriend to you, his expression unreadable because he knows how you get if they worry too much about you. you’re thankful, partly for that at least, his blank face prevents your mind from reading too deep into things and blaming yourself for things out of your own control.
“‘m makin’ your favourite for dinner. you’ll eat it, no questions asked.” the explosive pro hero states firmly, rising from his place crouched down by your side, obviously not before thumbing over your cheeks to wipe away evidence of your dried tears. “gonna run you a bath too, damn nerd better get you upstairs and ready by the time it’s done.” deku’s chest rumbles with a light hearted chuckle beneath you, lifting the heavy weight of the air within the room— bakugou had always loved brashly, with a fiery intensity that hardly left room for the answer ‘no’, and while izuku was more tame, they balanced one another out in a way that felt more like a warm hug than a battle. they grounded you, in the best of ways.
true to his disgruntled words, your blonde headed boyfriend runs you a hot bath. you don’t miss the addition of lavender oil to the perfectly warm water, the baking soda which you’re sure he only knew to add because his mother had said it would remove the demon spawn toxins in his body. izuku is the one to help you strip, holds your hands as you kick off gross comfort clothes and folds them away, after pressing kisses to your groggy face and chin.
it’s almost funny to see the two biggest and beefiest pro heroes sit on your bathroom floor crossed legged and beside the tub— both of them taking up the majority of the room. you know for a fact that no one would believe the sight unless they saw it, but they’re there. both of them, izuku midoriya and bakugou katsuki are with you encompassed in the silence while you wash away the ugly words that plague your mind and fill the pores of your skin.
they’re still there.
even as sweet lavender water moves in soft waves over your bare body, while black ink moves in the same way across your brain— tattooing self-depreciating thoughts into every inch. you’re not worth their time, they say, you’re wasting it. because how could their precious time be put to good use if you’re taking it up, they could be saving people but instead your boyfriends are here, drowning in your own darkness.
they’re still fucking here.
when they could be out there saving the people who needed it, who were suffering out there in the world outside of your home.
and the suds against your body, the warm water sloshing over your thighs isn’t enough to get rid of the burning sensation of vile phrases printing themselves against your body and clouding every thought that you think. toxic, mean and nasty things you can’t scrub away— none of it is enough to make you feel like you deserve bakugou tenderly lathering you up with the rose scented soap his mother had sent you for christmas or the sips of cool water midoriya brings to your lips in order to prevent you from overheating in the steam of the bathroom.
deku catches the painful twist in your face, pausing his movements to study you. “whaddya need?” you need it to stop, to find something to replace the pain and doubts that fill you.
“water, hotter,” you croak quietly, tears building up in the base of your throat as katsuki catches on and flicks the tap for a stream of hot water to fill the tub. “please,”
they tell you to let them know when to stop if the heat gets too much, but the scalding water burns away any reminders of the self loathing you feel across every inch of your mind, your body and your soul. it stings at the darkness in a way that’s painfully soothing and maybe if you sink under— it could stop hurting completely. if you could slide deeper into the water, would the waves of darkness not crash so hard?
and then the damn breaks, like a tsunami the guilt and anguish you feel crashes over your body and takes control, leaving you fighting for oxygen in the form of your happiness.
everything that you’d been holding back flows freely in salty tears from tired eyes, scorching a path down the apples of your cheeks and mingling with the contents of the tub below. your boys, they don’t notice at first, how you cry and curl in on yourself until you think the world won’t notice you anymore but then just as they always do, they’re pulling you into their warmth and bubble of light— freeing you from black intrusive tendrils even if it means they have to crawl into the tub and wade their through the ocean you’ve made to set yourselves apart.
“don’t—!” you heave with an uneven voice, signs of you falling apart evident in every way. bakugou and deku pull away from you slowly, with dripping shirts and worry written across freckled faces and red eyes. they’re scared for you, hate seeing you force your feelings down and away from them. “please don’t touch me—you’ll—“
the water in the bathtub sloshes from where you retract from their touch, backing yourself up against the wall and away from your boys. “we’ll what?” izuku presses but only gently, keeping you afloat, stopping you from sinking and bakugou stays put in his place, letting the latter talk you down.
you shake your head, trying to think of the right words but it’s hard to, with the crashing waves heavy against your ears. how do you tell your lovers that everything hurts, to think and to feel, to live day by day. you don’t want to bother them with and an extra stress to their busy lives. but you can’t keep it in any longer, bursting at the seams. “you’ll drown. i-if i touch you, i’ll pull you under, you’ll drown with me and you won’t be able to breathe and all those horrible things that i think about will burn in your lungs until you give up fighting like me,” your tears and hiccups interrupt your words, but they listen. bakugou and deku, they listen and they stay.
“yn—“
“because if you do, then all that i feel will be a burden to you— i’ll break in ways that can’t be fixed and you’ll be forced to pick up the pieces and i’ll just be a burden,” you continue, not even pausing to take a breath while you continue to cry. “if you stay to pick up the pieces, you’ll be taken away from people who need you, who are worth saving, and can be helped and—“
you can’t recount how many nights, similar to this in which you wondered why and how two pro heroes could want and love you, why they dealt with your down days that sometimes outnumbered the ups— even if they’d shown you how much they cared, you couldn’t help but feel guilty as if your sadness took up their time to save someone else.
“you can be helped, yn. you don’t have to go what you’re going through alone, you’re worth the time and the effort of helping, no one deserves to suffer,” the green haired of your two boyfriends cuts through the tail ends of your words, still keeping distance until he knows it’s safe to touch you again. there is no look of condescending pity on his face, no sign to show you’ve pulled him into the dark of your mind. it’s just izuku, trying to help you pull through.
you look to katsuki hesitantly, he hasn’t said a word. “but i don’t want to be seen as...as weak, or to worry you because i can’t get out of my own head—“
“y’not fuckin’ weak, we’d never think that of you. we see you try to hide your pain, pretend things don’t get to you when they do. but fuckin’ handlin’ things on ya own can make y’stronger than any two heroes combined,” a look of anger flashes across his features, finer with age and tired with work. but bakugou isn’t angry with you, but with himself for leading you to believe that you were an extra weight on his shoulders. both of their shoulders. “yer not gonna get rid of us or scare us away, we love ya, we’re here for ya ‘n if it’s help that you need or think yer not worthy of, we’ll find some. it’s okay t’ask for help.”
maybe it’s hearing it from someone else, that your pain and your depression is valid, that you’re not an extra weight on the people you love that allows you to come up from a tar-like ocean for fresh air in your lungs, for the waves to calm and the storm raging in your mind to soothe. maybe it’s the two of your boyfriends being there for you despite the fear that you’d scare them away with not being okay that washes away some of the awful things you think.
you know that their support won’t make things go away over night, that it will take time for you to heal but for now you can keep your head above the water just long enough to breathe.
“can i touch you now? is it okay?” deku asks, feeling less distant from you than at the start of the day, but as your body shakes with the last of your tears all you manage is a nod before the number one hero is pulling you into his chest from the tub and the number two is wrapping a towel and his arms around you.
you sit sandwiched between the two, they keep you at the surface— holding you tight while you let out what you’ve been holding back. “we can get some help if y’want it, the doctors...therapy might be nerve wrackin’...scary even, but it can help and we’ll be there every single step of the fuckin’ way,” katsuki reasures you with pets to your head, rocking you back and forth on your bathroom floor, steam clinging to the air that you can finally breathe.
izuku nods along in agreement, pressing kisses to your wet hairline. “we’ll be here. you won’t be alone.”
the murkiness of the water in your mind starts to clear, but only just— their warmth starts to push through the clouds like sunshine brushing against your skin. a light to the dark that's plagued your every waking moment, the waves no longer crash and destroy but instead lap comfortingly at your painful thoughts and tame them just enough for you to have a moment of clarity.
you don’t have to be alone or millions of miles away, you deserve the hands of your loved ones that offer you help instead of pushing them away. the process of healing and things like therapy or meds will be hard sometimes, but katsuki and izuku will be here by your side, to help you manage days where darkness rolls in waves that hurt and help you breathe once again.
#tteokdoroki#tw depression#bnhacity#🥂 — louvre’s angels#bakugou#deku#mha x reader#mha x you#mha imagines#mha fanfic#bnha x reader#bnha x you#bnha fanfic#bnha angst#mha angst#mha fluff#bakugou x reader#bakugou x you#bakugou imagine#bakugou fanfic#bakugou fic#bakugou angst#bakugou fluff#deku x you#deku x reader#deku fluff#deku angst#deku imagine#deku fic#deku fanfic
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The Ghost
Pairing: Ransom Drysdale x Black Reader
Words: 2,254
Summary: Reader is on a business date when a blast from a toxic filled past shows up
Warnings: 18+ Minors DNI, Explicit language, smut(Fingering, squirting if you squint, voyeurism)
A/N: I have just been on a disrespectful kick and who can do disrespect like our man Ransom. This came to me just out of nowhere and I wanted to write it because Ransom is just nasty and petty as hell. I hope you all like it! Reblog, Like, and Comment. Happy reading thots!
I do not consent to my work being copied, plagiarized, or translated in any way >:P
The mellow murmurs of the other guests could be heard as you sat across from the man you have been with for three years. You could see the nervousness in his demeanor as he checked his watch, adjusted his tie, and kept looking over his shoulder. His eyes were nowhere on you and it was getting annoying. You had to remind yourself that this wasn’t a date, something he hasn’t taken you on in months. This was only to meet with his boss who he wanted you to meet for whatever reason.
Getting tired of his fidgeting, you tried to give some type of reassurance, “Case, you look fine, babe. I’m sure your boss won’t be checking you out. Just relax,” you said reaching out to squeeze his hand.
He gave a smile that didn’t reach his eyes as he slipped his hand from under yours causing a small sting in your heart, “You just don’t get it, sweetness, my boss is very well dressed and I just want to make a good impression.” You didn’t understand just why he needed to make a fashion impression but there was part of you that didn’t care.
You looked out at the look of the restaurant admiring the ambiance of it. The restaurant was upscale, dimly lit, and decorated just right. There were couples on dates, groups who looked like they just got off of work, and a ghost that you thought that you would never see in a million years. His facial features were more chiseled, but the face, god that face, remained the exact same. But no one was with him.
His clothing choices had gotten better since your college days and it only added to how good he looked. Shifting in your seat, you looked over at Case as he stood up. Curiosity then confusion set upon your face as the ghost appeared to be inching closer to your table. No, no. He couldn’t be.
But as Case shook the hands of your college sweetheart, you knew that you were definitely in the twilight zone. He turned to you, full set of teeth on display as he began the introductions, “Mr. Drysdale, meet my lovely girlfriend, baby meet Mr. Drysdale. Oh, you knew that motherfucker. Ransom took off his shades, looking down at you as you could see the faintest smirk on his face.
Sticking his hand out over the table, he grasps yours in his, pressing his lips to your knuckles, “It’s very nice to finally meet you,” his voice still sounded like pure velvet and you couldn’t deny the electricity from feeling his lips on your skin again.
Your mouth suddenly became dry as you stared back at the man that once or still held your heart. Snapping out of your trance, you decided to respond, “I could say the same, Mr. Drysdale. Case couldn’t stop talking about you.”
He never broke eye contact with you as he spoke, “Well I am always on the tongue in more ways than one,” he smirked again knowing just what to say.
Smug bastard
With all the formalities out of the way, everyone took their seats. If seeing Ransom wasn’t enough, he had to sit right next to you. He threw you a smug look, his cologne lingering under your nose as he turned to Case who began having a conversation with him.
During the talk, Case decided to go to the bathroom, leaving both of you sitting at the table. Ransom felt like he just won the lottery and he was definitely going to make the best of it. He knew he had to get you back and that was exactly what he was going to do.
Ransom turns to you when you both are now alone, “That’s who you decided to be with? Why you with that asshat anyway?”
You shot him a look of disbelief as if he didn’t know or was too oblivious to the fact, “Well I wouldn’t be with him if you know, you would have taken us seriously. Instead, you wanted to fuck everything walking,” crossing your arms as his jaw clenched. It was no secret that he missed you. He wondered where he would be if he would have just been all about you. But young Ransom was a whore who cared only about himself.
But seeing the only girl that had his heart with someone else was just something he didn’t agree with, “Still doesn’t answer my question kitten,” that name. That fucking name. He knew what that name did to you and you let out a low whimper, hoping he didn’t hear it. But he definitely did because as soon as it was heard, he placed his finger under your chin, “Looks like some things don’t change. Still my kitten, baby?”
How bad you wanted to say “yes” was on the tip of your tongue. He was looking damn good and the ache in your core made you want him to ruin you. But the hurt in you wouldn’t let that happen. Moving slowly away from him, you dropped your head a little, “I would have been whatever you wanted me to be,” you didn’t expect all the hurt to come rushing back. But Ransom treated you as if he could have better. So, why on earth would he want you now?
“You still can be kitten, dump this fuck wad.” He placed his large calloused hand on the exposed skin of your thigh, rubbing small circles in one spot.
His touch, any touch really was something that you missed. Case hasn’t touched or even been affectionate with you in months. To have Ransom touching you was becoming more than you could bear. You tried to move his hand but you were no match for his strength, “Ransom, let go!” you spoke through clenched teeth.
Inching higher up, he dipped his hand under your dress, placing his lips to the shell of your ear, “Let’s play a game kitten,” he breathed as he pressed his lips to the spot behind your ear. He still knew your spots and it was maddening, “If my pussy isn’t soaked, then I’ll move. If she is, daddy isn’t moving any damn where.” Before you could retort, Case was coming back to the table, smiling at the both of you.
He sat down, fixing his suit jacket one more time, “I see you two are getting acquainted! Anything I missed?” He said raising his hand to signal the waiter to the table.
Ransom chuckled deeply, sliding his hands further up your dress, “Just getting to know your beautiful girlfriend over here. Quite the smart girl you have here,” But he knew you better than Case ever would. He knew you weren’t getting properly fucked let alone having orgasms. He could just tell by how responsive you’ve been without him even touching you.
Case beamed at the impression that you were giving Ransom. If only he really knew what was going on, “She’s amazing,” it took everything in you not to roll your eyes. That fucker didn’t know a damn thing and barely paid attention to you. As the waitress came to the table, you felt Ransom prod at your clothed mound, his fingers tracing over the wet material. Your body had betrayed you and he looked at you like he just won the grand prize.
You all had ordered drinks as Ransom rubbed soft circles on the soft fabric. He hated panties and would make sure you never wore them in college. He would soon rectify that after Case was out of the picture.
He pushed the soaked material to the side, playing with your exposed skin as you tried your hardest to sip your drink. Extracting his hand slightly, he tapped your inner thigh two times making you spread your legs wider. He slid back to your exposed lips, rubbing his fingers over your folds as you let out an inaudible sigh.
The conversation was taking way, ransom mindlessly playing with the wetness leaking from your aching hole. He was teasing you to no end and you were growing needier by the second. You wanted to feel him knuckle deep and all he wanted to do was toy with you.
You were barely paying attention to the conversation when you felt your entrance stretch and suck in his thick digit, inviting him back home. He stilled his finger inside of you, relishing in the warmth and wetness of you. He raised the cold glass to his lips and you clenched around him at the same time he took a sip.
He choked a little bit on the cold liquid as a small smirk formed on your lips. Case looked at him in concern, “You okay Mr. Drysdale?” Pressing into your seat, your hips rolled slowly letting his finger slide in deeper.
Ransom waved Case off to ease his worry, “All good, just the drink went down the wrong,” he pushed a second in your tight canal, you gripping your napkin tightly at the added intrusion, “pipe. Now where were we?” He wanted to let you know that he could play your game better than you and he always won.
He began to slide his fingers in and out of your sopping wet hole, sliding in deeper with each stroke. You tried keep a straight face through him playing your body like his favorite instrument and you were doing good until… He found the right spot. Only he knew how to find it and once he did. Oh, you were fucked. Curling his fingers at the spongy surface, he rubbed over that spot over and over, the heat dissipating all over your body as you tried your best to keep calm.
But your juices leaking over his fingers caused him to piston his fingers in with not give and he was taking all the advantage of it. You tried to clench your thighs, but he shot you an inconspicuous look that urged you not to fuck with him. Rocking secretly against his fingers, you could see him smirking while listening to whatever the fuck Case was talking about.
You grabbed your drink, bringing it back to your lips, preparing to take a sip when Ransom pressed his thumb to your overly sensitive clit, pressing into the center, “Oh fuck…” They both shot a look at you, amusement in Ransom’s face as Case was full of annoyance.
He looked at you like you just embarrassed him and you had to make a quick excuse, “I’m… so sorry. Babe this drink is so good.” Case clenched his fist still staring at you as Ransom let out a small chuckle.
“This place does have the best drinks. I’ve caught myself saying Oh fuck once or twice,” he said, strumming his thumb over your bundle of nerves, you downed the entire drink as Case resumed back to the conversation, looking completely ticked off. You bucked against the sensation making him withdraw from you as you already missed clenching around him. Squeezing your thigh tightly to stop your movements, he dove back in with the same movements.
Pulling your lip between the tightness of your teeth, you gripped the napkin once more, letting Ransom bring you closer to a well-deserved orgasm. Your juices leaking down his hand and you knew that this chair was about to be ruined. Your chest heaved up and down as his strokes and circles grew faster as you heard Case ask a question.
“So what do you think about that Mr. Drysdale?” Honestly, Ransom didn’t give a fuck about this conversation. The moment he laid his eyes on you, he knew he was going to take you home tonight and Case was far from his worries. He doubled down on his strokes as he drew quick circles, feeling you flutter around his fingers. He knew his kitten’s body after all this time and it was time to give her exactly what she needed.
Ransom placed the hand that hovered over the top of his lip on the table as he smirked deviously at Case, “Well, I only have one thing to say really,” he looked him dead in his eyes as the next words sent you over to an earth-shattering release, “Come kitten,” The tightness in your core finally snapped and you threw your head back as a silent cry erupted from your lips as you soaked His fingers and the seat beneath you.
He never stopped moving as your walls fluttered and clenched his thick digits, coating them in spurting cream. Case looked over at your blissfully fucked out face, then back and Ransom in complete shock. Ransom kept that same smirk, still staring at Case, “Good girl…” You began to come down from your high and before Case could say anything, the waitress showed up.
She smiled at the group as she placed the empty glasses on her tray, “Would you all like entrees or desserts?” Ransom pulled his fingers from your tight hole, not wanting to let him go as he withdrew with an audible squelching pop.
He put his fingers in the light as your creamy juices glistened against his skin, “Actually, I have my dessert right here,” darting his tongue out he slowly lick your sweet nectar from his fingers, placing them in his mouth to suck the rest completely off. Moaning at your taste, he pulled them from his mouth, directing his gaze to yours.
“Just as sweet as I remember kitten,”
Fuck…
#ransom drysdale daddy#ransom drysdale x you#ransom drysdale x black reader#ransom drysdale smut#ransom drysdale#ransom drysdale x reader#chris evans characters
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Bring Me Back
Pairing: Tom Holland x Reader
Summary: Filming “Cherry” had its ups and downs for Tom. When filming finally takes its toll on him, you’re there to instantly bring him back from the world of Cherry.
Warnings: Mentions of drug abuse, PTSD, murder. A smidge of smut.
A/n: In honor of the Cherry🍒 trailer dropping, I decided to write this!
(GIF creds: @atealiers )
Any kind of project was a blessing to Tom. He loved being an actor. He was fond of telling stories through the big screen and got a kick from portraying many different characters. Acting was something he felt passionate about, it was his craft and he was very dedicated when it came to becoming his roles. Cherry was quite different from the other movies he’s been in. It was dark and contained many subjects like drug addiction, PTSD, and crime. The world of Cherry was something Tom was not used to; it was twisted. He hasn’t been exposed to things like drugs or the events that Nico Walker had been through. Which was why he was hesitant to take on the role of Cherry.
When the Russo Brothers approached him with the idea, he was excited. He was getting the opportunity to tell another story and would explore the world of a new character. Though the more he looked into it, he realized that maybe he wasn’t up for the role. Was he really ready to dive into the dark and traumatizing life of Nico Walker? As an actor, he was willing to take the job, it would give him an opportunity to expand his career and would possibly be one of his best work. As Tom, he wasn’t sure if he could handle learning or re-enacting the events that occurred in Cherry. But Tom did like a challenge, which was why he ended up agreeing to become Cherry.
He prepared himself mentally and physically pre- production. For research, he interviewed army veterans and former drug addicts to get an idea of what it was like to be in those positions. To get the look of Cherry, he did a variety of things. For example, going on a diet and losing weight, then gaining said weight again once they had to shoot the army scenes. Another thing he did was shave off the gorgeous brown curls that adorned his head. At first you weren’t too happy with his change in hairstyle, but later on you found yourself running your hands along the short strands of hair, loving the fuzzy feeling it gave your palms.
After the interviews and hearing others’ experience, Tom felt a level of responsibility to tell the story of millions of people around the world. Not only was it telling the story of Nico, but of other army veterans who suffered from PTSD and people who’ve had drug addictions. He was fully on board now and there was no looking back. He was going to push himself to the limit and to places he’s never been before.
Filming was tough. There were scenes he had to do that were so unlike him, that felt wrong, and sometimes he just had to take a step back. They didn’t feel right, but it was nothing he couldn’t handle. This was his job, if he wanted this movie to be the best that it can, he was going to commit. Thankfully, he was working with the Russos, who he’s known for a while now. He was familiar with the two and they were patient with him, giving him the time to regain himself before shooting an intense scene. The cast and crew were very understanding as well, creating a safe space for him on set. Having Harry along with him helped as well, the familiarity of his brother kept him grounded and avoided him from falling into the void of Cherry. Though he had all these supportive people around him, there was only one person who could calm him down when things got suffocating on set. The only person he wanted to be in Cleveland with him but wasn’t. You. Since you had your own life and job, you were unable to fly out to Cleveland with him. Instead you stayed at your shared home with Tessa as company. All he needed was you when he felt the affects of Cherry caging in on him. Just the sound of your comforting voice over the phone could clear his head and make him breath again.
He had his bad days on set, where he would have to take a moment and hide in his trailer for a few minutes. During those few minutes he liked to be alone as he waited for you to answer your phone. The line would ring, it’d stop, then the sound of your sweet voice would be the only thing he’d hear. Sometimes you didn’t answer the first time, but nonetheless you answered eventually. It wasn’t the same as having you with him in person, you had your responsibilities, and he understood that. He just wished that one day you’d come to Cleveland. He wanted to be in your arms, stuff his face into your neck, breath in your familiar scent, he just wanted to feel you. You were his home. His safe haven. And it was all he wanted right now.
•
Glancing at your phone, you wondered why Tom hasn’t texted you yet. Not that you were itching for him to text you, but because around this time he would be blowing up your phone telling you things that happened during filming or how his day was going. You decided that filming probably went into overtime making him busy during his break. You shrug to yourself and continue working on your laptop.
You hear the sound of Tessa’s nails clicking against the floors as she enters the office of your home. You greet her with a smile as she settles herself beside your legs.
“Is it dinner time already, Tess?” You scratch her head as you glance at the time on your screen. It was currently nine at night, a bit late for dinner, but you haven’t noticed.
“Just give me five more minutes and I’ll get us dinner. How does that sound, love?” A somewhat sound of approval emits from Tessa. You get back to work, fingers typing away as you finish off the last of your work.
You finish in four minutes, finally satisfied with your work. You let out a content sigh and turn your laptop off. When you get up you stretch and let your bones crack after being in the same position for hours. Tessa joins you, stretching out her front paws then shaking her body out. You chuckle as you lead the way to the kitchen. Taking the scoop for Tessa’s kibble, you fill her bowl up, causing the dog to look up in curiosity. Once you placed the bowl down, her tail wagged wildly as she stuffed her face into her food.
You decided on going for something simple, ramen noodles. You were too tired too cook anything and ramen noodles were the quickest thing to cook in your pantry. While you waited for the noodles to heat up you checked your phone. You went through your notifications, but there were still no texts from Tom. Though you were concerned, you assumed that they had a long shooting day, making him too busy to text. 
Hi love! I hope you’re doing well in Cleveland. I know you’re probably busy, but hopefully filming isn’t tiring you out too much. Have an amazing day! Don’t forget to drink some water from time to time and eat :) Tess and I miss you and love you so much! Talk soon xxx
You send the text with a smile. He won’t read it till he was free or done with filming, but you knew he’d see the message while you were asleep.
The microwave beeps, letting you know that your food was done. You end your night catching up on episodes of New Girl and eating soup. When you were done you did your nightly routine and settled in bed. You turn the lights off and snuggled under the warm sheets.
“Night Tessa.” You whisper to her. A huff comes out of her as she makes herself comfortable on the foot of your bed. When the both of you were settled, you slowly drifted off to sleep.
Buzz
Buzz
The harsh vibrations of your phone shook you awake. Desperate for sleep, you blindly grab your phone and turn it off. Silence fills the room again as you turn around to stuff your face into Tom’s pillow. You were slowly drifting back to sleep when your phone began to vibrate again. With a groan you stretch back and snatch for phone off the night stand. You don’t bother looking at the caller id.
“Hello?” Your voice rasps out.
“Thank God you answered.” The person on the other line said. “I know you’re busy, but how soon can you visit Cleveland?” The deep voice was belonged to Harry.
“Uh—I’m not too sure, I’ll need to check in with my boss.” You reply. When you start feeling more awake you become curious as to why Harry can be calling you. “Why? Is everything ok? How’s Tom? I haven’t heard from him all day.”
The younger Holland sighs. He takes a moment to answer your questions making you suffer in silence, wondering what could have happened to your boyfriend. “Um, they’ve been shooting some intense scenes lately. Tom’s been trying his best but everyone’s noticed that he’s been a bit different.”
You sit up in bed feeling more awake. “What do you mean by different, Haz?”
“Well he’s snapped at the Russos quite a few times. There was this one scene, that they shot multiple times, and Tom would just break down after every one. (Y/n), I’m concerned for my brother, I don’t know what else to do. He’s locked himself in his room after every shoot. A—and I don’t know. I’ve tried to tell him that he can talk to me but he wouldn’t.” Harry explained, his voice croaked. You heart felt heavy for him. Harry was always there for his older brother, so to see him feel so helpless made you feel sorry.
“Haz, calm down, you know how your brother can get. How long has this been happening?”
Harry sniffed over the phone, “About a few weeks now. It’s only started becoming worse last week and now.”
The concern you felt for Tom grew. From what he’s been texting you, filming had been going great. He appeared happy on your FaceTime calls and sounded like his usual self. But maybe he actually wasn’t.
“Harry everything’s gonna be fine, alright?” You assure him. “I’ll call my boss first thing in the morning and when I get the ‘ok’ to leave I’ll get the first flight out to Cleveland. How’s that sound?”
“It sounds good. Can you tell me if you can make it? I’ll have someone come with me to pick you up at the airport.” His voice is quiet, almost muffled.
“Yeah I will, don’t worry.”
“Ok, thank you (y/n).” A small smile forms on your lips. You rub the sleep out your eyes as you glance at your closet. “Alright Haz, I’m gonna go now. But if there’s anything else, just text me or call.”
“I know, stay safe (y/n).” You bid him goodbye and place your phone on the empty space beside your side of the bed. Tom’s side of the bed. You bite your lip in thought as you worry about your boyfriend. You knew he was doing almost everything he can to make sure the movie came out perfect. If that meant shredding himself emotionally and physically, he was going to do it. Tom was dedicated to his work, but he’s never done anything close to Cherry, making you worried about the thoughts that could possibly be going through your lover’s head.
Tessa, who’s now woken up, waddles closer to you, sensing your uneasiness. You appreciate the dog’s gesture and pull her into your side, resting your chin on her head. You were basically sleepless the whole night. Although you haven’t emailed your boss yet, you already had a suitcase packed of your clothes. Your passport and other important belongings were already in a bag, ready to leave London.
The morning had been hectic. You’ve managed to get two hours of sleep, waking up at six in the morning. Still in bed, you sent your boss an email about a family emergency and how you needed to be out of the country for at least a week. As if the gods above knew of your situation, your boss willingly let you go, no questions asked and gave you well wishes. With that out the way, you scowered the Internet for flights to Cleveland. Luck was on your side that morning because you’ve booked a flight that took off in the afternoon. With your bags packed, you drove to Nikki and Dom’s to drop off Tessa.
Now all checked in, you were at Heathrow Airport waiting to be called for your flight. You were sat at your gate, with an iced coffee and a croissant from Starbucks, texting Harry. The two of you were discussing the time you’d arrive and how he’d pick you up. When you were both in agreement, you two decided to catch up. He had been in Tom’s trailer eating his breakfast. An hour passes and you were being called to board the plane.
You settle in your seat, but your leg bounced in anticipation. After the things Harry told you, you just wanted to have your boyfriend in your arms. You knew everything was probably getting to his head, all you wanted to do was hold him and tell him that he was going to be ok. As the plane began to take off, your lack of sleep caught up on you. Throughout the whole flight, you slept soundly, the worries of Tom subsiding for the time being.
~🛬~
The plane lands in Cleveland safely. It was night when you arrived. With your bags, you looked around the airport for a familiar curly haired boy. Harry waves wildly at you before running and pulling you into a tight hug. You laugh wrapping your arms around the slender boy.
“How’s your day been, Haz?” You ruffle his hair as he rolls your suitcase to the parking lot. He shrugs, “The usual. Was on set with Tom, ran around and got things for him, nothing much happened honestly. But you’re here now, so this is the highlight of my night.”
The two of you approach a black car with a driver inside, Harry motions for him to unlock the trunk. He lifts your case in before the two of you get into the backseat.
“How was your flight?” Harry asks you. The car began to move, exiting the airport and entering the highway.
“I slept through all of it, I don’t remember a thing about the flight besides getting on and off it.” You chuckle, leaning your head back against the headrest.
Harry nudges your shoulder, “Thanks for coming out with such short notice.” You wave him off. “It’s no worries, anything for my boys.”
The car is quiet, the only sounds that could be heard is the car’s wheels against the pavement. You turn to Harry, “How was he today?”
“He was pretty good in the morning.” Harry started. “Then filming started and he would grow frustrated after a few scenes. His temper’s been short. He snapped at me during lunch, which is normal, but I just asked him if he wanted some water. He broke down after a certain scene today, I tried talking to him but he still wouldn’t open up about it.” Tom wasn’t too open about his feelings sometimes. He struggled to voice them at times making all his frustrations and feelings bottled up in his head.
Half an hour later and you guys arrive at Tom’s rented home in Atlanta. As soon as you opened the door, you felt the heavy atmosphere. It was somber and tense, the chilliness of the weather also felt inside the house. Harry gestures up the stairs, “Don’t worry, go see him. His room is the first door on the left.”
You quietly thank him and climb up the stairs. You find his door, taking a deep breath before knocking. You hear some shuffling behind the door, “Harry I’m fine! Leave me alone!” His voice was deep, a bit scratchy. You frown at the door.
“Tom?” The room falls quiet. Suddenly you hear fumbling and the sound of heavy footsteps behind the door. The door opens and you finally see him. He was dressed in a large shirt with sweatpants. He looked tired, dark circles under his eyes, eyes glassy, and chapped lips.
“(Y/n)? You’re here?” He asks you in disbelief. A tight lipped grin forms on your lips.
“Yeah, Har—“ You were going to explain how you got there but he immediately threw himself at you. His arms wrap tightly around your figure, his head dipped into your neck, pulling your closer into him. One of your arms go around his neck while the other rubs his back soothingly. A whimper bubbles out of him, his shoulders beginning to shake. You managed to shuffle the both of you back into his room, closing the door behind you.
“You’re ok.” You whisper into his ear, pressing a kiss to the side of his neck. His grip around you never falters. Though he was much taller than you, he seemed so small at the moment. His body drowned in the shirt he wore, making him look thinner. You feel tears soaking into your shirt, making your heart clench in pain. You rest your forehead against his shoulder, holding and whispering sweet nothings into his ear until he was ready to speak.
A few minutes pass until his removes his head from your neck. You frown at his tear stained face, his eyes and cheeks red from quietly sobbing into your shoulder. Your hands cup his face, wiping the trails of tears on his cheeks. Tom leans closer to your touch, his eyes shut while his lips kiss your palm.
“I’m sorry, you’re probably tired from the flight.” He apologizes but you shake your head. You lead him to his bed and sit against the headboard. Tom follows in suit, desperately trying to get closer to you. His arms wrap around your torso, his head rests on your chest, while your legs tangle themselves together.
“I’ve had plenty of sleep on the flight, how are you?” Your lips are against his short hair from holding him so close. You nails scratch softly at his hair, calming him down.
“I don’t know if I could finish it.” He quietly admits. He shakes his head at himself.
“Why’s that, Tom?” Your boyfriend takes a deep breath as he sits up, removing himself from your touch. He sits across from you with legs crossed as he holds his head in his hands.
“I—I, it’s too much. There’s so much fucked up things he’s done. And all the things he’s seen. I just—sometimes I feel like it’s me who’s committed all of those things. When we shoot the scenes in the war and when I had to do drugs and rob banks, I felt like I lost myself—“ He cries interrupting himself to take a breath in. Compared to your fingers that ran gently through his hair, his clawed at his head. His palms rub harshly at his face, turning his skin a bright tint of red. To see Tom in such pain made you sad. You hated seeing him like this.
You gently remove his hands from scratching at his face and hold them in his lap. He stares down at your hands, clinging onto them as if his life depended on it. “I get lost in the character sometimes and I have to pull myself out of it to bring me back. But it keeps on happening over and over again. Then the Russos kept telling me to reshoot the scene more like Cherry, and I lost it and yelled at them.” You feel his tears fall to your your hands, making tears well up in your own eyes. You shuffle closer to him and kiss his forehead before pulling him into you. You stay quiet, letting him get whatever he wanted to get out.
Tom’s face is against your shoulder again. He sniffs before continuing, “It’s like everyday I find something he and I have in common. Then I think that maybe I’m turning into him. I don’t want him to be part of me. (Y/n), I don’t want to be him, I don’t want to do the things he’s done.” He sobs into your shoulder. Your heart breaks at how broken he sounded. His shoulders shook again, his back burning up with tension. A few tears made it’s way down your cheeks as you pulled his face away from you.
“Look at me.” You urged him. His jaw clenched, still looking down at his lap. He shook his head in response. “Tom, please. Look at me.” Your voice cracks. He slowly tilts his head up, your eyes connecting. He didn’t have that twinkle in his eyes, it’s like they’ve lost the light in them. Instead they were dark, like there was no life behind them. There was a mix of sadness, confusion, and even fear in his eyes.
You sadly smiled at him, cupping his face with your hands. “You’re not going to be him. You never will. You’re Tom. You are nothing close to Nico or Cherry. You are the sweetest man I have known in the world, you wouldn’t even hurt a damn fly. You’re not him. I know you aren’t. You wouldn’t do the things he’s ever done even if you were forced to. I know you Tom, I assure you, you’re nothing like him.” Tom hiccups, gripping onto your wrists.
“When this is all over and you’re done filming, we can forget about him. We won’t even mention him.” You assure him, stroking his cheeks.
“What if—,” You cut him off.
“No, there’s no what if’s. You’re going to be fine Tom. You’re surrounded by people who love you and will make you realize that you’re nothing even near him. You are the kindest man ever, you love your family, you care about your fans, and your brothers. You’re busy always taking care of everyone else, I think it’s time you take care of yourself, love.” You tell him. A small smile is on your face but it falters, “You don’t have to go through this alone, Tom.”
Tom takes a shaky breath in. “You’ll be there right?” He asks like a child making sure his mother will be there when he wakes up. “You’ll be there with me to bring me back?”
Your thumb smooths the crinkle between his brows, “I always will. I promise.” He nods and pulls you into him. You climb onto his lap and settle on his legs. He stares up at you, one of his his hands supporting your back, the other pressed against your cheek. “Thank you. I missed you so much. I’m sorry for not texting, everything’s just been so taxing mentally and physically.”
“No, don’t worry I get it.” You turn your face to press a light kiss on his palm. For the first time since you’ve seen him, Tom managed to crack a smile on his lips. He moves some strands of hair away from your face before resting his large hand on the back of your head. “I love you. I love you so much, (y/n).”
“I love you too, Tom.” You whisper against his lips. He takes that as a sign to finally crash your lips together. After months being apart, the feeling of his lips against yours felt like coming home. The kiss was desperate, like it was the air you both breathed. Tom had been longing for your touch, he craved you every second of the day, whether it be sexually or just missing you. The kiss grew rough, your teeth clashing, tongues poking and gliding against each other.
Tom lays you down on the bed, hovering over you. His hands grab and stroke at your body, trying to pull off your clothes to get close to your skin. He suddenly pulls away from your lips. “I need you. Please, I need you.” He almost begs you. Panting, you nod and push him to lay on his back. “Ok, let me take care of you, Tommy.”
He yanks his shirt off, throwing it to the side. You do the same, leaning down to meet his lips again. You kiss your way along his jaw and down to his neck. When you find that certain spot, he lets out a throaty groan, head falling back against the pillows. You run your nails along his chiseled abs and slightly roll your hips against his growing length. Tom grunts, hands instantly connecting to your ass and gripping onto your cheeks. He helps you roll your hips more, deeper with more friction against you two.
“Mm, Tom. I missed you.” You moan against his neck. You bite down and soothe the spot with your tongue after.
Tom looks down at you, lifting his hips to meet your clothes pussy. “Fucking miss you so much. You have no idea how much I’ve been dreaming of being buried in you again.” You kiss your way down his chest, but Tom stops you. His hands grab onto your leggings and slide them off.
“N-no foreplay. I need to feel you.” He stutters out, mouth agape. You nod in agreement and take his sweatpants off along with his boxers. You spit in your hand, running your hand along his dick to give it some wetness. Tom helps you lift yourself over him and guides your hips down his erected cock. You let out a combination of a sigh and moan as your walls envelop and stretch around him. Tom slightly sits up against the headboard, your tightness wrapping around him. He lets out a cry of relief, your walls around him feeding his cravings. You use his shoulders as leverage to pull yourself up but Tom stops you.
“What’s wrong?” You eye him cautiously. Tom shakes his head, “Nothing’s wrong. I just—can we stay like this for a while? I just want to feel you, please?”
“Yeah, we can do that.” You send him a reassuring smile as you settle back down on him. His hands make themselves comfortable around your waist. You maneuver your arms under his and wrap them around his back. Tom smiles at you, rubbing your back and guiding you into his chest. Before you can nuzzle your face into his neck, he presses a kiss to your temple and lets his fingers get tangled in your hair.
With his eyes closed in bliss, he whispers, “Thank you for bringing me back. I love you.”
You kiss his collarbone basking in the feeling him being so close to you. “I’ll always be here. I love you too.”
#marvel#mcu#avengers#Tom Holland#tom holland x reader#Tom Holland imagine#tom holland one shot#tom holland headcanon#Tom Holland smut#Cherry#tom holland fanfiction#tom holland drabble
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For The Very First Time
Sirius Black x Reader
Summary: Sirius Black just might be more sentimental than you think when he takes you on a trip down memory lane.
Prompt used: “Sorry how do you spell that?”
Word Count: 4.1k
Warnings: mild angst, smoking, fluff, kissing
A/N: This is for @sweeterthansammy ’s 1k writing challenge! I hope you enjoy. Flash backs are italicized, and the prompt I used is bolded!
The weather was a little bit chillier now that the sun was dipping down in the sky, chilly enough for a sweater or a light jacket. Something you didn’t have much time to think about with the spontaneity of Sirius’ plans and just how urgent he’d been making them out to be. Really, there was no rush and he knew that, of course he knew that, but he was far too eager for his own good and you knew that.
You were certain he’d under dressed when you found him standing by the front door, leaning against the frame in that tattered old jean jacket. The one there’s no chance in him getting rid of, not in a million years. It’s got a myriad of holes here and there in the faded, washed out denim, the cuffs having seen better days as the frayed material dangles down half torn. A miscellaneous pin from James is still on there, even that bright yellow smiley face is stuck on the collar that you’d put there ages ago. It was more than a well worn article of clothing, that much was for sure.
You managed to break away from James and Lily’s conversation, more so Lily, and any other time you wouldn’t have minded a single bit. You absolutely wouldn’t have, but with Sirius calling you from the floor below in the small Potter home, you find yourself having no choice but to give in to saving the conversation for later in favor of quieting the raven haired wizard.
You walk down the stairs until equally tattered converse come into view, then those same old black denim jeans, the those frayed jean jacket cuffs. You smell the distinct smell, something that’d only further been confirmed as you reach the very last step.
“Either I’m a fool, or time just stopped,” he says, flicking the ashes from his cigarette as he smiled down at you.
The corner of your mouth quirks up, the kind of smile he knows isn’t a hundred percent sweet.
“I think you’re just a fool, Pads,” you say, that smile widening a fraction. There it is. He walked right into that one and he knew it, rolling his eyes. “And I don’t think Mr. Potter would approve of you smoking in his beloved family home.”
“Which is exactly why I’m standing outside,” he grins before bringing the cigarette back to his lips, throwing his hands up as he takes one step backwards through the threshold of the doorway just so he can officially say that he is in fact outside and not at all breaking the rules of the residence.
Sirius Black liked to bend the rules when he could, he liked to walk on the wild side just about every chance he got no matter how trivial it may be. He claims it’s the only way to be, claims that’s what having fun is all about and anything less is boring. Nonchalance is simply in his nature.
“Yeah, I’ll bet you are,” you counter, hopping off the very last step when he tugged on your hand to urge you out the door.
He pulled the door shut behind him and stopped you in your tracks, making you turn on your heel before you could take another step forward. You look up at him with a narrowed gaze and await an explanation as to just why it is he’s gone and stopped you when all he’s done the past ten minutes is tell you how desperately he’d wanted to go. So you stand and your stare and you watch as smoke blows past parted lips, lips that quirk upwards in a smile as he looks at you.
In that moment, he dips down, pressing his lips on yours in a kiss that’s as smoky as ever and the gesture alone has your smile pressing into his kiss. A smile that’s genuine just as much as it’s teasing.
“I thought we had somewhere to be?” You say, breaking away as you look up at him with a raised brow.
“We do,” he says, taking another puff before you snag the cigarette right from between his fingers, dropping it to the little stone walkway before putting it out beneath your boot.
You take notice of his pursed lips that fight a smile, at the squinted gaze he’s got set on you as you spin on your heel and walk ahead, leaving him to stand there and stare after you for a fleeting moment or two. You’ve got all the amusement in the world sitting on your expression and he doesn’t even need to see it to know it, he can tell just by simply hearing the laugh fall from your lips. He can see it as he catches up to you within a second’s time.
“How very rude of you,” he says in faux offense, but it’s not too long before you feel the tips of his fingers brushing against yours.
“How very generous of me,” you counter, and his scoff doesn’t go unheard.
The next time you look up at him, he’s got those sunshine yellow shades on, those obnoxiously yellow sunglasses that sit on his nose seemingly more often than not. James had gotten them for him at the town fair just a few years back, a gift just for laughs that he’d gotten with the rest of his tickets. They were bright and they were bold and very much fitting for the year nineteen-eighty-one, but he’d gone and kept them. Of course he did.
Sirius Black kept every single thing his friends have ever given him no matter how ridiculous or trivial it may have seemed. Even when he was just a child still stuck in his dreaded family home, he’d saved a shoe box from a pair of dress shoes he absolutely hated wearing, one pair of dozens that inevitably got scuffed up just a little too much for the liking of his parents before they’d gone and bought him a new pair to look more presentable for the family image. Aside from that, he’d kept a shoe box, one that he had tucked under his bed.
Inside were all the letters that James and Remus had sent him by owl over summer break, each and every letter even if it was simply James complaining about some nonsensical thing or a joke or if it was Remus writing to see if he’d gotten his Hogwarts letter yet. He kept all of them. He kept the four leaf clover James had stumbled upon, and he kept that special quill Remus had swiped from Snape. He never knew his best friend had a knack for being mischievous until that moment.
He’d read those letters on his best nights and his worst, read them just for so. They were tattered and worn at the creases where they were folded, but he didn’t plan on getting rid of them any time soon.
Over the years that sentimental collection grew and grew, adding to it a myriad of pressed flowers and leaves from Lily, and bookmarks from Remus, postcards from James that were the absolute most ridiculous he could find. You added to it with miscellaneous letters and a guitar pick you thought he might like. He never used it, he didn’t want to ruin it. He kept that feather boa you’d found and even that lucky coin. He kept it all.
Sirius Black was more sentimental than he let on, he’s got a softer heart than he showcased to most, he kept every one of those things no matter how stupid or trivial it may seem to someone else. But he’d never in a million years admit it. James had found it once, but he never said a word about it.
“You never did tell me where we’re going,” you say, kicking a pebble out of your way as you walked along the cracked sidewalk.
“I believe that’s the point of a surprise, love,” he says, and you catch his smile as you look up at him, lips pursed as you nudge him with your elbow.
“You’re terrible at surprises,” you tease, your smile in your voice and had he not been wearing those sunglasses at sunset, you’d have been able to see his eye roll. But you knew him well enough to know he’d gone and done it regardless of the visual confirmation.
“Have I ever told you you’re a pain?” He asked, his chuckle following his words as he grins ahead, glancing down at you briefly.
“Yes, and I take that as a compliment,” you say, hearing his continued laughter as he shakes his head.
You try and put the pieces together, try and pick up any hints to put together any form of information that just might lead you in the direction of where you could possibly be going. It was in town, that you knew for certain. It was somewhere, local otherwise he’d have taken Mr. Potter’s car. The attire was no use in a giveaway because there was not a single chance there’d be an occasion where you’d find Sirius taking you somewhere in which you’d need to dress to the nines. The days of pristine suits and freshly polished shoes were far behind him, he hated dressing up with everything that he had.
He didn’t even dress up above and beyond for James and Lily’s wedding; well, he did, but he dressed down his suit with a half loosened tie that wound up being a headband and that tattered pair of converse. And he even wore those same old yellow sunglasses.
It was early evening, and things don’t tend to stay open for that much longer, so that narrows things down just a little bit more. Makes things just a little bit clearer, but it all proved to be not as helpful as you’d like it to be.
The small town was dotted with street lamps casting the area in a warm glow as it began to get darker and darker outside. The surrounding trees held reddening leaves that dropped and fluttered to the ground when the breeze sifted through them. And it’s only then that it hits you, the smell of coffee and spice that wafts through the air the closer you get. The sweetened air the closer you got. You even heard that familiar little clang of the bell over the door.
It wasn’t until then that you’d realized that maybe this was his surprise, that it absolutely was judging by the way he’d been biting the inside of his cheek to stifle his grin.
“Sirius Black, is this what I think it is?” You ask, your brow raised as the corner of his mouth quirks upwards.
Your question is answered when that smile breaks through, when you do indeed stop in front of the door to that ever familiar coffee shop and he holds the door open for you to step inside. It’s noticeably warmer than the chilly weather outside, cozier than ever as the smell of coffee washes over you. It looked just the same as when you were here last, felt just as inviting as it always did.
There were a few carved pumpkins sitting outside the door, an assortment of fall decorations littering inside the small shop. Each of the little wooden tables have cozy orange table cloths, and string lights are hung. The entirety of the shop smelled like fall festive drinks and what was left of the pumpkin rolls and muffins, not to mention the sweeter than sweet scented candles that were lit.
He tugged on your hand as he stepped up to the counter.
“Can I get a black coffee with two creams and a hot chocolate?” He asks, dropping your hand to dig around for his wallet in the pocket of his jacket.
That was another thing, Mr. Potter had gifted him that very same wallet a handful of years ago. It was a hand-me-down, but that was the least of his concerns when he was given the leather wallet. He didn’t care about the scratches or worn corners. That was the first real gift he’d ever gotten that had true thoughtfulness behind it.
He remembered your order like the back of his hand, and he’d gotten the same thing every single time.
The drinks were ready in no time and he put some money on the counter with a little extra for a tip, handing you yours as he headed towards that ever familiar table tucked away in the corner by the window.
He ran his hand through his hair, sitting those sunglasses back on the top of his head once more to push his hair out of his face. Your smile was fond as you looked at him, a stubborn chunk of black hair dipping over his forehead and brushing against the tip of his nose anyway.
“Remember this place, love?” He asks, a knowing smile playing on his lips.
“As if I’d ever forget,” you say, a laugh leaving your lips.
Of course you did, it was hard to forget the one and only place you’d met Sirius black in a few years back.
It was a hectic afternoon, customer after customer flooding into the coffee shop especially now that the fall season was sweeping in at last. Things were always busy around this time of year, things were always busy around this time of day, so you’d come to expect the rush hour by now after all this time you’ve worked there.
Things were fairly simple once you got the hang of it, once you were able to do things with a practiced ease and it made the line of customers a little bit easier to move along. Most of them you knew by name, most of them you knew their orders because they never failed to get the very same thing each and every day that they came in. Some of them came in every day, some of them came in every week, some of them even had a select day of the week that they stopped in for their usual order.
It was one of the things you liked about working there. The regular customers were friendly as ever and made the workload a little easier given the prior knowledge of just what they get and how they like it, and it makes the time fly just a little bit faster.
The day hadn’t been your finest, you’d gone and spilled half a cup of hot chocolate on your apron, one you didn’t have the time to swap out and you’re quite sure you’d still had a smear of flour on your face from catching up on baking that morning before opening time. But that clumsiness was only in your nature and it was everything you expected from yourself.
“Y/n, can you cover up front? There’s someone waiting.”
That clumsiness only heightened at the sight of a new face, one you don’t believe you’ve seen frequent the shop before. He’s got a mess of black hair he keeps tucking behind his ear, yellow sunglasses dangling from the collar of a Queen t-shirt as his gaze focuses out of the window to his left. He’s got a pack of cigarettes tucked in the front pocket of his jean jacket and pin on the other.
You quit your staring, you quit while you were ahead as you smoothed your coffee stained apron.
“What can I get for you today?” You ask, capturing his attention as he looks at you.
You swallow thickly as your gaze meets gray eyes, a half smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. You take notice of the dimple in his chin and the strands of dark hair that dip down over his forehead as he leans against the counter.
“Just a black coffee with two creams, please,” he says.
“Your name?”
“Sirius.”
You nod with a smile as you snag a cup and the marker from your pocket, turning on your heel to head towards the coffee as you uncapped your marker before you very quickly made that realization and spun back around. In the process, you nearly tripped over your own two feet and you can feel the heat blossoming in your cheeks.
“Sorry, how do you spell that?” You ask, biting the inside of your cheek.
You hear the softness of chuckle as he looks at you, surprisingly not out of mocking even with the way you just made a fool of yourself in front of him. He spelled it out for you with a smile, and you turned away without tripping this time. You made his drink just how he’d asked, your heart racing in your chest the entirety of the two minutes it took to make it as you thought about his smile.
You tried your best to stall, to steal a little bit more time before you had to go back to the counter to face him once more. To give yourself a little more time to let the heat in your cheeks cool off.
You pressed on the lid to his cup and took a breath, turning around and heading back to the counter where he stood leaning against it still.
“One coffee with two creams for Sirius,” you say, setting the to-go cup on the counter as he dug around his pocket for some money.
He counted it out in his palm as his hair fell in his eyes, quickly brushed away as he ran his hand through his hair and set the money down in exchange for his drink, and a little extra for a tip.
You notice the way his gaze lingers on you for a little bit longer, you notice it as the seconds pass and your heart races. It lingers on you and you can see the way the corner of his mouth quirks up as he does, spinning the cup in his hand out of an absentminded habit as his gray gaze finally meets yours.
“You’ve got a little something on your face, love,” he says, pointing to his own cheek as a signal for your own face.
Your hand shoots up immediately to swipe across your cheek, the heat in your face flooding back once more as you swipe your fingers across your skin, pulling back to see that dreaded flour on your face that you knew was bound to be there from that morning.
“Oh, uh, thank you,” you say with a laugh and a smile, his following soon after as he nods.
There’s a sort of tension that simmers as you meet his gaze once more, as it bounces to his smile and you’re not quite sure if time actually stopped or if this is some cliche moving moment happening to you in the middle of your shift, or neither and you’re just being ridiculous. That, it’s probably that one.
Either way, you find yourself interrupted by the ding of the bell to your side on the counter from a customer growing impatient, a call of your name sounding over your shoulder just behind you. It all brings you back to reality.
“Have a nice day, Sirius,” you say, watching as he nods.
“I’ll see you around.”
With that, he offers you that same smile that had your mind on it for a ridiculous amount of time, that smile that made your heart race, and he turned away and headed out that door with a little ding of the bell over the door. He headed down the sidewalk as he snagged a cigarette from his pocket, lighting it before he disappeared around the corner.
“You’re thinking about it, aren’t you?” Sirius asks, grabbing your attention as he gazes at you over the rim of his cup, gray eyes full of amusement.
“About what?” You ask, playing into it with a half smile even though you know you’re bound to be met with a tease.
“That time you tripped over your own two feet. I mean, do I really have that effect on people, love?” He jest, feeling you kick his foot just under the table.
There it is.
“Must you be so cocky, Pads?” You ask, your gaze glimmering with amusement as you purse your lips.
“I’m afraid I must,” he says.
You roll your eyes as you sip on your drink, eyeing the smile forming on his lips. “What?”
He chuckles as he shakes his head, his gaze dropping down as he swirls his drink in his hands and bites the inside of his cheek. His stare is more amused than ever as he looks at you again, that same lingering gaze set on you in the very same way it had been all those years ago and you knew it couldn’t have meant anything good. If it was anything like that very first time, you were bound to feel your cheeks grow hot even though you’ve known the troublemaker for years.
He doesn’t say anything at first, quiet as he lifts his hand and swipes it across the top of your lip and all the way to the corner of your mouth. He’s just as amused as he wipes away some hot chocolate that’s been left behind from your sip, his chuckle immediate.
“You’ve got a little something on your face, love,” he says, and you hear that teasing tone in his voice that he’s always got, that mischief dancing in his eyes.
“I truly think it’s you that’s the pain,” you huff, biting back your smile.
He chuckles. “‘S that so?”
You nod as you smile at him. “Very much so.”
He bites his lip momentarily as he looks at you, that pesky chunk of his hair falling back down in his face. “I take that as a compliment.”
He used your earlier words, of course he did, that’s just how Sirius Black is. Taunting and teasing in the most lighthearted of ways and that’s something that’s always been so, that’s something that always will be so forever and ever.
He’s got the tip of the arm of his sunglasses between his teeth, having given up on using them to hold back his hair as he looks around the little coffee shop where it all began, as he looks out the window at passers by, the corner of his mouth quirking up when he feels your gaze on him. It widens a fraction as he feels you get up, feels you swing around the edge of the table to take a seat in the booth bench next to him rather than sit across from him.
You’re quiet for a few moments as you rest your head on his shoulder. The foot traffic in the shop was dwindling as it neared closing time, growing less and less busy until it was starting to become just the two of you there. But you weren’t so focused on the details, not when you’ve been in your own little world with the one stealing your attention right next to you as you sat in your usual booth in the corner.
This was it, this was where it all began, this was where you’d met the chaos that is Sirius Black. The chaos that’s brought nothing but good into your life, nothing but a thrilling excitement that only he could bring.
You lift your head and look up at him, his gaze falling on you within a moment’s time. You see that smile, that smile that makes your heart race a mile a minute. You see it and you mirror it as you look at him. It’s only a matter of seconds before you lean up and press a kiss to his lips, soft and sweet and tasting of hot chocolate and coffee and a little bit of that smoke that never quite left his lips.
You kiss him before you wrap your hands around your cup, feeling his eyes on you. You take a sip as you stifle your smile, the arm of his glasses between his teeth once more as that smile he’s got remains as you look at him. You smile when you look away, head shaking as you nudge his foot with yours.
This is where it all began a handful of years ago. This is where you met Sirius Black for the very first time.
—
Tags: @nancybycrs @pogueslandia @hahee154hq @snitches-at-dawn @writeroutoftime @awritingtree @lilypad-55449 @medalloway-blog @vicouscirce @mon4907 @violetrainbow412-blog
#sammy's 1k celebration#sirius black#sirius black fluff#sirius black x reader#sirius black oneshot#sirius black x you#sirius black imagine#sirius black fic#sirius black fanfiction
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Vacation
Word Count:
Pairing: Avengers x BlackFem!Reader
Warning: Swearing, A tipsy reader, Fluff maybe?
Summary: the avengers finally have a break off from avenging the world. The first place they go for vacation? Maui Hawaii.
A/N: You guys liking my content means a lot💜💜. when writing one-shots why don't people put oufits? i wanna see wtf i be wearing since im y/n!😂 I got some long faux locs in my hairrr sooo ykk i had to put it in here🙂
Y/N stood in the kitchen pouring coconut rum into a drink that she found a recipe for on google. It was called a mermaid cocktail and it looked like something she could get away with, without any of her family members saying something. "I'm so ready to drink this, it looks so good." She mumbled stirring the rum mixture.
She is 23 years old but the team still treats her like a little kid. As of right now, everyone was taking a nap from their huge lunch. All those missions they work was eventually stressing them out so Y/N took it upon herself to plan a vacation for them. She rented out a huge beach house for them. Best idea everr!!
Seeing the smiles on their face made her feel so content with her main priorities being happy. "What are you making?" Loki's voice said from behind her. Y/N gave him a big toothy grin. "Oh, nothingggg!"
"You're up to no good, I know you are." Loki raised an eyebrow at her turquoise-looking drink. "I'm not going to even ask." He sat down at the island, shaking his head. Y/N could feel something was off with him. She put the pitcher in the refrigerator, then sat beside him in the chair.
"What's wrong?"
"I'm thinking Y/N."
"About? We're on vacation Loki, we can think when we're back at the tower doing boring missions." Y/N stared at his jet black hair, having the urge to run her fingers through it.
"No, you can't touch my hair." Loki knew exactly what she was thinking. Y/N pout her bottom lip, squinting her eyes. "That's not what I was going to do. Anyway, what are you thinking about?"
"I feel out of place. I just know they are still mad with me from the events of New York." Loki buries his face in his hands. "I want to go back to Asgard, I know they'll rather want me there than here."
Y/N removed his hands."What makes you think that Loki? If none of wanted you here then I wouldn't have told you about this trip. " She giggled making him let a small smile creep on his face. "You're right where you belong and if anyone isn't happy about you being here then just know that Thor and I are ecstatic to have you here. I'm glad you came, means a lot to me."
"Means a lot to know that you want me here Y/N." Loki's small smile went to a big one. Y/N slowly moved her hand to his hair. He watched her slow movement in amusement "No Y/N." She huff playfully giving up.
"Fine, I'll try another time but I'm happy that I made you smile. You're way easier than Bucky's serious ass. Now that's out the way, it's hot girl summer so no sadness from no oneee!!" Y/N exaggerated getting out of the chair going back over to the refrigerator. She pulled out that now cold pitcher, chugging down the concoction.
"Did I hear Y/N say something about a hot girl summer?" Steve rubbed his eyes while he walked downstairs. Y/N rubbed her mouth from the leftover drink on her lips. Steve furrowed his eyebrows at the now half-empty pitcher. "What's that?"
"Nothing! Don't even stick your nose in it." Y/N put the pitcher back. Steve looked at Loki who just shrugged his shoulders with confusion still written on his face. Y/N placed a rushed kiss on their cheek so they wouldn't smell the amount of alcohol she just consumed. "I'm going to get ready so we can go to the beach. Steve wake everyone up for me please so we can leave in the next 30 minutes."
"Okay Y/N," Steve replied ready to question her but she was already up the stairs. 20 minutes later Y/N had music blasting from the speakers while she ready. From that consumption of alcohol, it kicked in about 10 minutes after she got ready. She was only tipsy, maybe. Y/N couldn't focus because she kept giggling at everything.
"Damn why is everything so funny!" Y/N said getting mad at herself. Her long black faux locs flowed down her back after she struggled to place them in a high ponytail. Meaning she broke 3 hair ties and gave the hell up.
"Y/N we're waiting on you!" Tony yelled up the stairs but Y/N waved him off. She grabbed her purse, pausing the music. Tripping over her feet a bit, she made her way downstairs. Bucky caught a glimpse and instantly spoke up.
"Oh hell no Y/N. Go change."
She waved him off too, purposely ignoring him. "I'm readyyyy". Tony crossed his arms over his chest.
"Yeah, I'm going to have to agree with Barnes. Y/N that isn't a swimsuit, that's two pieces of cloths."
Thor smiled, "I like it Y/N and since I like it, we can leave." He picked up a beach chair but everyone yelled no in protest except Natasha. Thor rolled his eyes sitting the chair down. Loki moved her hair aside, closing the white and blue shirt that she wore.
"Now you need a hair thingy to keep it close."Y/N smacked his hand away lightly, going over to the kitchen to find some chips. "Y/N why aren't you saying anything?" Bucky followed still upset about her outfit.
"Her outfit is fine guys. Let's go because you guys are over exaggerating." Natasha placed her shades on her face. "I got your back Y/N!"
"It's not fine, she's showing too much," Steve said being overprotective. Still not phased, Y/N nodded her head from the kitchen. " That's why you my bitch, thank you!" Everyone was shocked by her choice of words. Bucky grabbed her waist.
"Y/N are you drunk?"
Y/N giggled,"A lady never drinks, she sipssss." She dragged out the s, kissing his nose. Bucky pressed his lips together, getting his answer.
"Guys she's drunk!"
Groans went around the room. Steve was in realization,"Ohhh so that was what she was drinking when I came downstairs earlier."
------
"And it's hard to keep my cool
When other bitches tryna get with my dude and
When other chickens tryna get in my coop
'Cause you're a one in a million
There ain't no man like you"
Y/N belt out the lyrics to Streets for the 13th time while Bucky held her in his arms while they were in the ocean. They had been at the beach for 30 minutes, and a biker went by playing that song in her speakers. Y/N haven't let go of the song since.
"Y/N if you sing the same lyrics one more time, I swear I'm going to drop you." Bucky scolded while she gripped his shoulder tighter. Y/N placed her head on his chest, the sun was getting rid of her drunkness. She was tired since she didn't take a nap like everyone else plus Bucky's heartbeat and the sound of the oceans was calming her down. "Sorry! It's stuck in my mind."
Steve, Tony, Loki, and Thor played on the beach with water guns. Natasha laid in the sun, getting a tan. Per Y/N's request, Bucky was in the water holding Y/N close. She was surprised that he even agreed to it.
"Bucky?"
"Yes Y/N?"
"I'm tired."
"I figured, let's get you out the water." Bucky turned around to walk back to the shore. Y/N just snuggled more to his chest. "Bucky?"
Bucky’s voice held slight annoyance, thinking she was playing."What is it Y/N?"
"I'm glad you came on this trip, I know this past year had been so hard on you and I thought this trip would help ease your mind. Plus I got to know you better, that’s a bonus.”
“Yeah at first, I didn’t want to come but I couldn’t turn down seeing you in a bikini.” Bucky laughed making Y/N laugh as well hitting his chest lightly. “Bucky!”
“What? I’m being honest. I just rather for only my eyes to see.”
“You’re such a flirt.”
“You going to have to get used to it. But for real though, this trip made me not think about things that's been haunting my mind. Coming on here was the best idea.”
“I’m glad I could help with that.” She tapped his shoulder for him to stop. He placed Y/N on her feet. “I’ve come up with the best plan though.”
Bucky narrowed his eyes, “What’s the plan?”
——
Y/N made herself sink underwater. Bucky waited a couple seconds before putting on his best acting voice. “Guys! Guys! Y/N she’s drowning!” Natasha stood at the shore, looking out at the water in concern. The team wasted no time running in the water.
“What?!?”
“What happened??!?”
“Oh god, Y/N?!”
“Shit!”
Steve was Y/N's victim, he hunched over in her area of the water. Bucky pulled at the ends of his hair keeping the act going. “She was doing alright until I couldn’t hear her anymore.” Y/N lurched up grabbing Steve by the neck, pulling him in the water.
Bucky's face of distress turned into humor. “Steve she got you good!” Both Y/N and Steve appeared out of the water. Y/N was laughing so hard she was clutching her stomach. Loki found it amusing while Tony, Steve, and Thor didn’t.
“That was a good one Y/N.”
“Don’t listen to Loki Y/N. You had us worried!”Thor huffed and Steve nodded his head in agreement.
“Yeah! I thought something really happened to you.”
“I’m sorry guys.” Y/N snorted trying to contain her laughter. “It’s not my fault, it’s Bucky. He came up with the idea. You guys should’ve seen Steve’s face when I came out of the water.”
Steve mocked her laugh, “Ha Ha Ha. It’s not funny.” Bucky held his hand in defense trying not to laugh as well. “It’s not mine! This was all her idea.”
“Capsicle is right, it’s not funny. Don’t scare me like that again.” Tony scolded her, he held out his arms. “Now come give me a hug so I can feel better.” Y/N gave him a hug, that humorous smile not leaving her face. When she tried to pull away, Tony held a grip. She realized.
“TONY!”
He laughed leaning forward and they both fell in the water. Soon it turned into a big splashing war between everyone, they were having so much fun.
————————-
At 7:28 p.m. both Y/N and Bucky walked back to the beach for dinner. The restaurant they chose for tonight’s dinner was there. Since Y/N is over the planning for the vacation and Bucky is attached to her hip, they were at dinner first.
“I know the wait is going to be minute so sit down while I talk to the hostess.” She reassured him. Bucky looked at her kind of worried because he wasn’t comfortable with crowds yet. She squeezed his hand, “You’re okay.”
Bucky nodded his head reluctantly. Y/N walked off to make sure this restaurant gave them a private table away from the crowd, preferably on the beach. After about 10 minutes of talking, something just told her to turn around. It was some woman that looked around Y/N’s age steadily talking to Bucky even though he looked so uncomfortable.
“Hold on one sec.” Y/N held a finger-walking away, not even waiting on the hostess's response. Y/N quiet appearance kinda scared them both. “Excuse me. Hi!”
The woman looked at Y/N with attitude. “Um, why are you speaking to me?”
Y/N took a deep breath to calm down. “ I’m speaking to you because you’re talking to my boyfriend and you obviously see him uncomfortable.” It was for the sake of the moment. Bucky and Y/N aren’t together, just a few flirts here and there. But since Y/N knew this bitch couldn’t take a hint she said, boyfriend.
“You might have him confused for”
Y/N cut her off, “No I don’t have him confused for no one. That’s my boyfriend so get your desperate ass out of his face before I embarrass you in front of everyone. We don’t want that do we? Now walk away miss.”
The woman turned her nose up walking away without saying another word. Once she was out of sight, Bucky visibly relaxed. “Thank you so much Y/N. She wouldn’t stop talking and my a-anxiety was getting bad because I didn’t know her and...” He shook his leg. Y/N sat beside him giving him a hug.
“Hey hey calm down, it’s okay now. I could see she made you uncomfortable. I wasn’t going to stand there and let her continue to do that.”
“Thank you Y/N.”
“Anything for you Bucky.” Y/N kissed his forehead then she stood up, holding out her hand. “Now let’s go get this table because I did cut the hostess off coming to help you.”
Bucky laughed grabbing her hand. As they walked back over to the stand, realization hit Bucky. He smirked.
“So I’m your boyfriend now?”
Y/N rolled her eyes playfully, “No Bucky, it was in the heat of the moment.”
“What if I was to ask you out?”
“In your dreams Bucky.”
————
This took longer to write then what it supposed to be.
Hope you guys like it 🥰, I was trying to include a Loki moment because I’m starting to like him more.
Stay slutty my friendsss!
#marvel#bucky barnes fluff#captain america#bucky barnes#bucky imagine#bucky fanfic#steve rogers fanfiction#bucky barnes one shot#bucky x poc!reader#bucky barnes x black!reader#loki (marvel)#loki laufeyson#natasha romanoff#loki x black!reader#thor x black!reader#tony stark x black!reader#steve rogers x poc!reader#loki x you
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Just Us
Henry Cavill x Reader
Summary: Henry is sick and tired of you bringing dates back to your shared apartment, and he has no problem letting you know. So basically, mega jealous Henry, which I am a pathetic sucker for.
Warnings: mentions of sex, lots of cursing. I think that’s it.
Notes: this is kind of similar to another fic I did, and I try not to do that, but I just really felt the need to write this, so I did.
Words: 2732
Henry’s mood turned sour the second you walked through the door with your date in tow. You came in with a bright smile on your face that he returned with a scowl, but you did your best to brush it off. Your roommate acting like an overgrown child every time you brought home a guest was nothing new; you certainly weren’t surprised, and you had no intention of stooping to his level.
“Don’t mind us,” You called to Henry from over your shoulder as you shed your coat and draped it on the hook. “This is James.”
Henry only grunted in response, not looking up from fixing his dinner; peanut butter about to be spread messily on a slice of wheat bread. You rolled your eyes, took James’s coat and led him over to the couch where he smiled sweetly when you invited him to sit and offered him a drink.
Entering the kitchen, you opened the fridge door and pulled out two beers. “So?” You asked, your eyebrow raised as you searched for the bottle opener in the junk drawer. Henry dropped the knife with a clang on the countertop, then turned to you and crossed his arms.
“So, you just thought this was fine,” He asked, his voice dripping with aggravated sarcasm as he shrugged his broad shoulders and frowned. “Just whatever, no big deal?”
You chuckled at the weak argument you’d had at least three times before. You wouldn’t have given him the chance to say anything about your date at all if you knew he wasn’t going to hang on to it the entire night just to explode in the morning for bringing a stranger into his home. Your home too, you would often have to remind him. So, it was your mission to let him get the anger out early in the night. You’d be less likely to have to worry about it later and could focus your attention on the man sitting in your living room rather than Henry’s imminent frustration.
“Henry,” You sighed and took a sip of your beer. “As of right now, it’s just the continuation of an innocent date. We’re going to watch a movie.”
“As of right now?” Henry huffed deeply. “What the fuck does that mean?”
“It means that if it gets a little heated, I promise not to make out with him in front of you, but at this current time, you have little to worry about.”
He sucked in a long breath through his nostrils. “Ok, that’s—”
“And we won’t fuck on our couch. I’ll take him to my room so you don’t have to see anything scarring,” You teased with a wink.
“Ok, enough.”
“And we won’t be loud, I swear.”
“Enough!” He snapped. You quickly whipped your head around the corner to see if James heard, but he was still sitting there, playing with his fingernails as he patiently waited for you like the gentleman he was. When you looked back at Henry, he was practically quaking with anger. “Get that asshole out of my apartment.”
“Um, our apartment. And no thank you.” You smiled and cocked your head to the side as innocently as you could. “I’d like to be having sex tonight.”
“With him?” Henry pointed a long finger in your date’s general direction. The fury in his eyes could’ve stabbed James through the back of his head if the wall weren’t in the way.
You rolled your eyes. “Obviously.”
“For fucks sake, Y/N. Have some self-respect.”
Your playful smile instantly dropped, and if you weren’t leaning against the wall, you would’ve stumbled. Henry had said a lot of things before; Hurtful things, things that made you want to slap him, but something about this felt worse. Assuming you were devaluing yourself by wanting to have sex with a man who was sweet, and kind and generous, and million other lovely things men, other than Henry, have never been to you, was like a stab to the gut. Henry was your best friend; you were his. You supported his choices and dreams, and it seemed Henry did the same for you unless it came to this very particular subject. He hated every man you brought around, but bringing them around or getting involved with them did not make you a stupid girl who cannot take care of herself.
“Jesus Henry, stay in your lane, would you?” You said, shaking your head and rubbing at your temple with your free fingers. “I don’t need my best friend giving me shit. Why can’t I bring a guy here without you acting like a complete dick to him and me?”
He stepped closer until you had to look up to meet his glare. “You’re a very smart girl, Y/N. Figure it out,” he growled, then moved around you, but you grabbed his arm before he could escape yet again. Every time, he tried to escape. Every time, he stomped away from you like a grump as if you had some reason to be sorry or ashamed, and you weren’t having it any longer.
“We aren’t children, Henry. I’m not playing this game. If you’ve got a problem with me, say it to my fucking face.”
He stared at you for a long beat, but then shook your hand off him and made his way down the hall, slamming the door to his room once he was inside.
-----------------------------------------------------
James was better than most at kissing you, and you’d kissed your fair share. He knew what you wanted--how you liked things--without you needing to ask, and it was like its own little miracle. There was no fumbling around. His lips were firm and his arms around you were strong. He was confident in his touch on your skin as you straddled his lap, and all of it combined had you a moaning, whimpering mess.
“I wasn’t sure we would actually get to do this,” He said between kisses as you both tried to catch your breath.
“Why?” You lightly chuckled, your fingers skimming down to the little buttons holding his shirt together and easing one open. “I’m certainly having a good time.”
“Believe me sweetheart, I am too, but Superman there looked like he wanted to kick my ass.”
Fucking Superman. That asshole had come out of his room at random, inconvenient times as you and James lightly pawed at one another throughout the movie, and you both could feel Henry’s eyes on you. After the look he gave you the first time he came into the living room, you stopped turning your heads his way when his heavy footsteps thudded against the hardwood.
You made a low humming sound that had James’s cock twitching in his pants, and you moved your head down to peck your lips against his. “Don’t bother with him,” You whispered.
He leaned into the light scratching your nails were giving the side of his scalp, and with a groan, said, “If you say so, babydoll, I won’t give it a second thought.”
“Good.” You smiled, satisfied, then kissed him again but he pulled back barely a minute later.
“It’s just…the way he looks at you.”
“He’s a protective friend.” You snickered and ground your hips down on his a little harder to get him back on track.
He groaned as his fingers dug into your waist, but it didn’t distract him. “No, it’s not only that. It’s like…” His lips pursed trying to find the words. “He looks at you in a way that friends normally do not look at one another.”
“He’s got some weird attitude tonight, ok? It’s nothing.” Grabbing his cheeks, you forced him to look directly at you when you said, “Now keep kissing me before I get too impatient.”
-------------------------------------------------------------
At two in the morning, you figured you were safe. You figured there would be a direct and easy path to the front door of your apartment as you let James out with a smile and a goodbye kiss and promises to text one another the next day, though you weren’t sure how much either of you really meant it. And you were right, there was an uninterrupted tiptoeing to the door. It was when you turned back for your bedroom that you realized the path had a roadblock.
Henry stood in front of you, the fumes nearly visibly wafting off him, with the harshest look he had ever directed at you taking over his entire face. It was a disservice to his handsome features and made your stomach twist uneasily.
“Is this for fucking real right now?” He growled so intensely it vibrated in your ears. “Did I just see what I think I saw?”
“Jesus, Henry, you scared me.”
“You actually slept with that guy?”
“Wh—”
“Un-fucking-believable.” Laughing half-heartedly, he ran one of his hands down his face, but that was all it took for the shock to wear off and for your annoyance to set in.
“Ok, I’m done with this. What is your goddamn problem?”
The two of you didn’t fight this way. Not for long anyway, and even so, this time was significantly worse than any other. Outbursts happened for the both of you, snapping, and words you wish you could take back, but Henry was still looking at you the way he had earlier in the night; like you were a reckless child he was losing respect for by the minute, and it broke your heart.
He stared at you as if expecting you to have an answer to your own question, but when you didn’t continue, he shook his head and rubbed the back of his neck, and said, “I’m going to a hotel. I can’t be here right now.”
“What? Henry, why?”
His keys were in hand, his phone and wallet tucked into the pockets of his sweatpants, when it finally registered to you that he wasn’t kidding. He was leaving so fast he didn’t care to take anything other than the necessities with him. That’s how much he wanted to get away from you, and you hated it. You never wanted to get away from him.
Light from the hall streamed through the doorway as you finally began to follow after him. You grabbed at his t-shirt when he wouldn’t respond to your repeating calling of his name, and he whipped around fast with a frown down at you. Your mouth kept opening and closing, unsure of what to say.
He sniffed once, thinned his lips, and removed your hand from his body, then as calmly as he had spoken all night, said, “I’m in fucking love with you.”
Then door was slammed behind him, jarring you and leaving you to soak the night in.
----------------------------------------------------------------
When he said those words to you, the six words that he would never be able to take back, the ones that irrevocably changed your friendship in the blink of an eye, everything inside of you began to tremble and vibrate and beat with such intensity you could almost feel the functions of your body. Your blood was pumping a hell of a lot faster and you heart was ready to burst.
Your brain, your skin, the nerves and veins under that skin; every bit of you was working overtime to help process what happened and keep you alert as you did so, and maybe it was all a little overkill, but he had said the one thing you never thought you’d hear.
I’m in fucking love with you.
It would repeat over and over in your head, bouncing around the walls of your skull as it tried to find a way to escape, but there was no use. You could never forget his confession, or the way he said it. There was something desperate about it, weak. There was exhaustion, as if he were tired of holding it back and had given up on even trying.
It was too much. You’d never dismiss it, and God, when he got his ass back home you wouldn’t let him brush it aside, but for now, it was too much.
You wanted sleep after sitting completely still for two hours, staring into space. So you carried your body to the closest room, his room, crawled into his bed, and tangled yourself within the sheets until you wouldn’t be able to unwrap yourself without effort you did not possess at such an ungodly hour. You were stuck, trapped, engulfed by him, just like you wanted to be. Then you took his king-sized pillow, massive like his body, and hugged it to your chest, tucking your face in it. It smelled like him, all musky and piney and perfect in a way that always made you dizzy when he would sit a little too close and drape a long arm around your shoulders as you watched tv or read a book.
And you cried yourself to sleep, wishing he was beside you.
--------------------------------------------------------------
Henry came back in the morning, though he wasn’t sure how he gathered the courage. Maybe it was the fact that it was you. Just you, his best friend, his roommate. He loved you in more ways than one, and perhaps it was that knowledge that made him a little stronger.
He’d face you, and he’d do it with the intention of making everything clear. He was in love with you and it wasn’t going to change. He loved you as his friend; that wasn’t going to change either, and no way in hell was he going to lose you twice over.
Taking a few deep breaths, Henry unlocked the front door and eased his way inside. You weren’t around the sunlit soaked first floor of the apartment, and when he traipsed upstairs and nudged your door open, you weren’t there either. He wanted you tucked in your bed, not gone and probably terrified at the thought of seeing him, so running to James’s or Jake’s or Jason’s apartment to avoid him. That would be the perfect painful exclamation point on the disaster of his poor decision making.
Then he found you. Not missing, but snug in his bed, warming the mattress with your body as it dipped the slightest under your weight. Everything about the sight killed him and melted his heart simultaneously. There you were, laying peacefully angelic, right where he had wanted you for months. And it looked so beautifully natural.
Not even stopping to think, Henry inched his way to the other side of his bed, lifted the duvet and slid beneath it. He reached an arm around your waist and pulled you close to kiss your forehead, then tucked his face into the crook of your neck. When you stirred, he leaned back to take in your face as your eyebrows scrunched and your lips parted in a yawn.
You didn’t open your eyes but rose a hand, placed it on his cheek, and ran a thumb along the corner of his mouth. As the goosebumps spawned all over his body, he wasn’t even sure you were fully awake, but then you whispered, “It was always you, Henry. Always.”
Henry swallowed hard as your sleepy voice continued.
“I figured you weren’t an option, and I was doing my best working around that.”
After running a hand over your hair and tucking some behind your ear, Henry pressed a kiss to your lips. A short, soft one to see how you’d react. Then you opened your eyes slowly and met your Y/E/C with his blue.
“Do it again,” You said, and so he connected your lips a little firmer, tightening his hold on you, and rolling on his back until your body splayed over his.
You moaned when he caressed his tongue against yours after opening your mouth an inch. Your heart fluttered in your chest the stupid way dramatic, moony-eyed women often described it in novels. You thought it was a myth, the idea that anyone could make you feel so loved just from a kiss, and you’d lost hope for that kind of thing long ago. But Henry ripped your pessimism to shreds in a matter of minutes.
“I want you to be mine,” he mumbled against your lips. “Just mine.”
“Then I’m yours,” You said without hesitation, tilting your head back enough to look in his eyes. You nudged your nose against his. “Just yours.”
---
Tags: @dugan365 @moonlightimagination @pietrotheavenger @marvel-fanfiction @hawkeyeharrington @dani-si @wintersoldier98 @then-there-was-me-emily @prxttybirdz @jazzwoman897 @meganwinchester1999 @ufffg @debra77 @rebelliouscat @anise-d-castle6 @projectxhappiness @lowkeysebby @stringgeek13 @notmyfault404 @jjamesbbarness @guera31 @sophiatomlinson23 @thisismysecrethappyplace @hiddles-rose @picapicapicassobaby @lokilvrr @sunshine-seven @harrysthiccthighss @agniavateira @forthebrokenheartedthings @tumblnewby @summersong69 @starlite13 @mstgsmy @purplelove75 @defffcc @the-soot-sprite @kissthatlifeaway @atomicpaperhairdouniversity @aquariuslavenderhoney @the-problem-of-leisure @amberlokabrenna
#henry cavill#henry#henry cavill x reader#henry cavill angst#henry cavill fluff#henry cavil fic#henry cavill fics#henry cavil fanfic#henry cavill fanfics#henry cavill fanfiction#henry cavill x you#henry cavill x female reader#henry cavill x y/n#henry cavill imagine#henry cavill imagines#henry cavill oneshot#henry cavill oneshots#henry cavill one shot#henry cavill one shots#henry cavill stuff#jealous!henry#jealous!henry cavill
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