#i meant to show anxiety having an internal battle with himself but he comes off as depressed

[angelofrainfrogs]

Going Back: Ch. 23

~Coauthored by @zeitghest~

Fandom(s): Five Nights At Freddy’s: Security Breach

Description: Things are looking up for Gregory. After putting the soul of a formerly-immortal killer to rest, he and his new family can finally begin their lives anew. Sure, Gregory might have been cursed with mysterious Remnant in exchange for being involved in this mess—not to mention his caretakers consist of sentient robots and ghosts… But there’s no doubt that the bond they share is unbreakable. They love him, and he in turn. 

All in all, life is finally starting to go right for once. 

…Unfortunately, true peace is a hard-won battle. There are other things to contend with besides William’s decrepit soul, and Gregory will learn that his role in the lives of the Aftons and Emilys is far greater than anyone could’ve imagined. 

Rating: T

Read on Ao3

It was officially reopening day at the Pizzaplex. Mike and Charlie had headed out early to help with the chaos; with no stage shows scheduled in lieu of their missing front man, Freddy and Gregory were given a pass to skip the morning rush. However, they couldn't stay cooped up in the hotel for long and headed out to join their friends at lunchtime. As usual, they went straight for Sam’s office to check in, snagging Mike and Charlie along the way who'd come to greet them at the entrance. Freddy was admittedly a bit nervous as he knocked on the CEO’s door—a feeling that he wasn’t a fan of at all. But he had his family by his side, so he knew everything would work out in the end.

“Afternoon, boss!” Michael called through the door. “Hope the day wasn’t too chaotic?”

Things were looking up for the Pizzaplex. With the large number of cars lining the parking lot, it was clear the morning shift was a success. Most of the families visiting were already at attractions and party rooms, so running into a huge crowd was unlikely. Even so, Gregory found himself scanning the halls they trailed down as if it was his first night here. Following directly behind, Charlie made sure he got to Sam's office feeling a little safer than he might have walking alone.

“Hey everyone! No—nothing too crazy yet. The day's still young, though,” Sam joked, knocking against the wood of his desk with a superstitious rap. “Sophie’s been busy. Bonnie Bowl has been pretty popular today! And Foxy's been a huge hit with the older kids, too.”

“That is wonderful to hear!” Freddy exclaimed, eyes shining with excitement. He was itching to go out and pace the floor, greeting guests every chance he got… but in his current form, he’d only come off as an over-enthusiastic employee. He’d just have to settle for the next best thing: watching over his doppelgänger in his stead.

“I’m glad things are turning out so well.” Mike clapped Sammy on the shoulder. “Any animatronics giving you trouble? Malfunctions, weird responses… being places they shouldn’t be?”

This last part was a clear dig at Ennard, who should have remained in the attendant’s little room above the stage all day. Until they got an official okay, they were only meant to observe, not interact. It was a win-win: they got to watch how humans acted, and Michael got to keep from tearing his hair out for the next few days with anxiety.

This little arrangement kept everyone happy overall. Ennard was oblivious to Michael's deep-seated hatred—or in denial; Sam really couldn't tell. Should Ennard have already broken his promise, it would be awkward for all the patrons to watch the security guard scold a grown man for trespassing on the first night of their reopening.

Sam thought for a moment, then told Mike with a sigh: “Bonnie—that bunny has ants in his pants about something. I found him smuggling a chest full of whole inflated balloons through the backrooms this morning.” The harried CEO shook his head. “Could one of you go check and make sure the party schedule in his internal calendar is working right? Just ask him what the day and time is. I don't want him filling up a room with extra party favors when there’s no birthday.”

“On it.” Michael gave a salute, then turned on his heel to search for the rabbit. The last thing they needed was an over-enthusiastic animatronic worrying Sam and spoiling Gregory’s birthday surprise…

“Is my old body ready for the personality download?” Freddy asked. Running a hand through Gregory’s hair, he looked to Sam with a soft laugh. “Have the children been asking for him? I was hoping Bonnie and Foxy would be a good distraction…”

He didn’t mean to sound conceited at all, and it was clear from his tone. It was a simple fact that Freddy was the most popular—he was still the face of Fazbear Entertainment, after all.

It was time to get to work again. Sam rolled up the sleeve, nodding to Freddy.

“Yes!” he answered, a bit frazzled and frayed due to the stress of people asking him where Freddy was. “Constantly. The kids are getting a little suspicious—either that or I’m just being paranoid."

In the animatronic stand beside the workbench and computer, Freddy’s old empty model was propped up under a canvas sheet. Sam carefully pulled the sheet away, proud of his work for polishing and fixing Freddy’s paint job. He looked as pristine as the others now; all that was left was to download him again.

Gregory had quietly slipped next to the workbench as Sam booted up the computer. Of course there was no way to replace his dad—Gregory couldn’t idolize a Freddy more than the one he called ‘father’ and went to for comfort. Still, he was excited that the whole band would be reunited soon.

“Let’s not keep them waiting, then!” Gregory exclaimed, quickly checking the cable connections before booting up the personality folder and beginning its data dump.  

Freddy stood with Charlie, watching the bear carefully for signs of life. The redhead’s face was pinched in concentration. There was no way this shouldn’t work, but he couldn’t help but worry.

It happened like all the others—gradual movements that worked up to full awareness. First, a subtle twitch of a finger. Next, a wiggle of an ear. Then a slow blink of those ice-blue eyes as the bear perked up and automatically scanned the room to assess the situation. There were four people present. The face of Samuel Emily, his creator and CEO of Fazbear Entertainment was recognized instantly. However, he didn’t know the others: a man with red hair and a bright, fixed gaze; a younger girl with dark brown hair standing at his side; and a little boy sitting by the computer workstation.

The man’s children, perhaps? Although the girl looked a bit like Sam, in all honesty… They were all watching intently, clearly waiting for something.

“Hello!” the bear greeted after flexing a few more limbs. He scanned the room with a wide grin on his face, mainly focusing on the unfamiliar faces. Guest protocol dictated he acknowledged new patrons first and foremost, especially if there was a child present. “It is a pleasure to meet you! My name is Freddy; what are yours?”

Charlie held her breath. The other animatronics waking up was routine—predictable. No one knew how much this Freddy knew. She hoped that the extra data wipe Sam had done to this particular model kept untoward memories at bay, especially over the past few weeks. Gregory would be the first to test this, getting up from the chair besides the computer with a confident strut. He had faith that this Freddy model would be just like the one he first met, friendly and endearing.

“Freddy? Can you hear me?” he asked curiously, wondering if his audio systems were online. Sam took a more silent approach, an amiable grin on his face as he came around to observe the  interaction. The animatronic turned at the voice, his smile bright as he crouched down to be on Gregory’s level.

“Hello, superstar!” he said, that familiar voice once again undercut with robotic feedback. It was a subtle difference, but those who knew the original Freddy would be able to tell which one was talking without too much effort.

As programmed, the animatronic bear performed a cursory scan of the child in front of him. He blinked once—

Accessing guest databank…

—twice—

Performing facial recognition cross-reference…

—and then his eyes focused again and he held out a claw.

Match. Guest profile: male, 12 years old, name—

“Gregory Fitzburgh—that is a name fit for a rockstar!” the bear said cheerfully, waiting to see if the child would take his proffered shake or if Gregory was less hands-on. If so, he’d adjust his interaction accordingly.

Freddy’s shoulders sagged with relief at the confirmation that both the facial recognition software worked and Gregory was officially in the guest book under their new last name. Now, to see how his son responded to the friendly bear…  

Gregory met his hand with a warm and receptive shake. All systems seemed good to go from the outset. His dad never needed to worry about how the Glamrocks were going to perform without him.

“Heck yeah! Thanks, Freddy!” Gregory exclaimed, excited that his favorite animatronic could continue bringing joy to the other kids at the Pizzaplex. Naturally, he was trusting of Fazbear—but that didn’t mean he wasn’t watching the newer version of Freddy scrupulously.

Charlie could finally let herself breathe, or rather simulate the action. Freddy was never infected with the virus—but that didn’t mean there wasn’t still a smidgen of William’s viral footprint anywhere. Everything seemed alright to her, and she allowed herself to smile. Sam, satisfied so far, came around to the newest iteration of Freddy.

“It’s good to have you back online,” he welcomed warmly. “I’ve got a few surprises for you, buddy!”

Sam would act as if Freddy was powered off for routine maintenance and upkeep. Nothing strange had happened in the past few weeks since his last update.

“Oh? I am excited to hear!” Freddy 2.0 responded, getting back to his feet. When his gaze swept around the room, Fred thought it only prudent to greet the other new faces. Performing a quick scan of the girl and the redhead by her side, he was surprised to note they were in fact new employees!

...They were also not human, but it seemed like none of them thought to point out that fact so Fred decided that was a question to ask Sam when they were alone. Or, perhaps some of the other animatronics could give him some insight later.

“How nice to make your acquaintances!” the bear said kindly, reaching out both paws for Freddy and Charlie to take. “Charlie Emily...” He paused, sparing a questioning glance at the CEO. “I did not realize you had a daughter, Samuel.”

And there was that ever-learning AI at work, giving him a hint of distinct personality. With a hum of acceptance the bear turned back to acknowledge the other man. “And... Freddy Fitzburgh.”

That tilt of the head was back, coupled with a definite question in those illuminated eyes. The android watched carefully, shaking his hand with a slow greeting. “It is a pleasure to meet you, Freddy. I am a big fan of the name, by the way.”

The bear's expression shifted at his voice. It was... weirdly similar to his, but again, he wasn't going to question it—not right now, at least. He already had much to catch up on without worrying why this man seemed so disarmingly familiar.

“As I am of yours—and the pleasure is mine,” the bear responded, and it almost seemed like the pair had started a contest of wary formality. Turning back to Sam, he acknowledged his creator with a nod. “Now, what were these surprises you wanted to show me?”

For a brief moment of unease, Gregory swallowed thickly as he watched them interact. Only when his dad complimented his bear counterpart did his shoulders relax, a soft sigh exhaling through his nose. There was nothing to fear here; two of the friendliest guys ever manufactured were standing in the same room. There would be no hard feelings between people so warmhearted and good of nature.

Catching their bear friend up to speed on things might take more than a night, given his special circumstances. Sam would take it slow, knowing the more he lied the harder it was going to be to tell Freddy the truth... If it ever needed to come to that.

“Oh—how rude of me. Yes, this is Charlie! She should be uploaded into your employee file. Right along with her sister, Mari.” Sam placed a hand on her shoulder as Charlie extended her arm with a wide grin. Sam cleared his throat, moving on from the subject of family and why everyone was here to watch Freddy wake up. “The surprises! Yes—” He moved for his desk and dug through his coat pocket for the security tablet he kept. “—you're going to love this. It's something you were asking a lot about...”

Soon, a security feed was presented to Freddy 2.0, showing the front of Bonnie Bowl where an official-looking guard was chatting with his good friend, Bonnie Bunny.

“Mari... ah, yes, I see now,” the bear responded, staring into space for a moment as he accessed the employee database. There were a surprising number of new recruits, and it led him to wonder what in the world happened while he was out... However, this train of thought was soon derailed as Sam pulled up the camera feed. Freddy 2.0 gasped, eyes growing wide as he looked upon the familiar rabbit and one of the new employees he'd just read about.

“Is that... Bonnie?!” he asked in awe, glancing up to Sam in disbelief.

According to the last data point in his memory banks, Bonnie had been out of commission for a few months. It'd been a sudden replacement, his removal and transfer of bass-playing status to Monty, but to Fred it was just a sad but inevitable fact of being an animatronic performer.

“May I see him?” he asked eagerly. “I know there are still some tests we must run before I can be released onto the floor, but... is there time in Bonnie's schedule for a quick hello?”

Sam couldn't say no to that face. He supposed that was his fault for creating, in his own opinion, the sweetest iteration of Freddy Fazbear. “Of course you can! Feel free to free roam today; I freed up your schedule for you to better acclimate.”

Sam figured it would be a nice treat for the kids, too—if Freddy wasn't tied down to a party, anyone that might've missed him could get a free moment with their favorite cartoon bear. It wouldn't hurt Freddy either to get as much socializing in as possible.

“I bet you won't even guess the next surprise...” Sam laughed quietly to himself, switching the camera feeds over to Pirate's Cove. A few clicks and he was there, turning the tablet back around to show who else had joined their Glamrock crew.

Foxy stood tall with his peg leg perched on the very point of the bow, watching over a few of the older kids as they ran about the play area. A few parents took pictures, flashes from their cameras temporarily causing Foxy to appear woozy. Sam scrunched his eyebrows together at the sight.

“Ugh. Poor Foxy...,” Sam muttered under his breath, knowing he'd have to find those people later and ask them to stop flash-bombing his robots.

“Oh dear...” the Freddy's murmured in unison, then quickly shot a glance at each other.

“Come on, then—no time to waste!” the original soul laughed brightly, hooking his arm through the bear's. “We will accompany you to help control the crowds. You have been sorely missed!”

If there was anyone who knew how to handle the inevitable mob that was about to surround Freddy, it was the old bear himself. Looking to Gregory, he asked: “Superstar, are you going to stay with us for a bit, or would you like to find your friends?”

The animatronic glanced side-eyed at the redhead clinging to him. That was his term of endearment for children... although he supposed anyone could use the phrase. It's not like it was a branded trademark of Fazbear Entertainment.

The look that Freddy 2.0 gave his dad did not go unnoticed by the teen, and Gregory had to suppress a laugh. Gregory didn't want to wade through a crowd of kids that would probably tear his head off to get to see Freddy Fazbear, live and in the mechanical flesh. With a mock salute, he told his dad: “I'm gonna go find Evan and see what he's up to. Later Freddy! It was nice meeting you!”

When he turned to leave, Charlie stopped him with a grasp to his shoulder.

“Before you go—take some cash. Get a water before and try to lay off the sodas; they're bad for your teeth, kid,” she reminded, cramming a few bills into Gregory’s hand.

“And I can also get cake with this…?” he asked with raised eyebrows, trying to persuade one of his caretakers into letting him indulge in one snack.

“You can totally have cake later. But eat some actual food first,” Charlie said before opening the door for the rest of their little group. She was confident that Gregory could navigate the Pizzaplex by himself now. With friends at every turn, he would be a-okay. As Gregory passed through the door, she found herself checking his wrist and making certain he still had Mari's bracelet secured.

“Bye, Gregory!” the bear called after the excitable kid. He'd barely talked to him for ten minutes, but he liked him already. Turning to Sam, he gave him an appreciative little bow. “And thank you for the repair, Sam—I will be sure to check in later tonight.”

With Freddy and Charlie also bidding Sammy adieu, they took a collective deep breath and led the bear out into the Pizzaplex. As expected, it was chaos on sight. Most patrons were simply happy to see an animatronic up close and personal as Freddy weaved through the crowds with the two rather strong employees by his side like robotic guard dogs. The guests would shout and wave to try and get the bear's attention, but kept their distance overall.

Then, there were the ones who'd come specifically to see the lead singer. These kids—and some of their parents—swarmed the trio instantly, and it took a combined effort to push through the crowd little by little with short greetings and photos. Freddy had to lecture a few parents for flash photography, happy in the back of his mind that he was no longer affected by such an issue but knowing it threw his old body for a loop when the lights spiked in front of his eyes.

Eventually, they were riding the escalators up to Bonnie Bowl. It seemed like its namesake and Michael had retreated into the attraction, which was fine—less people around for the meeting of old friends. Soon the bear was stepping out of the elevator with Charlie and Freddy on his heels, searching for the rabbit. Upon spotting him still speaking with the man from earlier, he let out a gasp.

“Bonnie!” The bear waved brightly as he rushed over, not hesitating to pull the bunny into a tight hug. “Oh my goodness, I have missed you, old friend!”

Bonnie managed to turn Michael's lecture into a free bowling lesson somewhere around ten minutes ago. It started as a way for Bonnie to sort of escape the consequences of being caught with random party favors for Gregory, the charismatic bunny now nonchalantly standing beside the lane as he coached Mike on the way he flicked the heavy ball down the alley. 

When Bonnie heard the familiar, garbled voice he jumped a little. He nearly told them that this seemed like déjà vu, but quickly held his tongue and came around to meet Freddy in the middle of the bowling parlor. Arms were held open wide, and Bonnie hugged his best friend-2.0, giddy with excitement over seeing Freddy the way he always remembered him.

“Fredbear! You've finally come out of hiding. I missed you too, ol' sport!” the friendly rabbit drawled, floppy ears resting against the bear's head and directing a wink to the original. “Thanks for bringing Freddy here, you two!”

“Well, well!” A voice that 2.0 didn't recognize spoke, and over Bonnie's shoulder he could see the man in the security guard uniform striding over. Mike tipped his hat, grinning widely up at the bear. “Good to see you up and running, Freddy. I'm Michael—new head of security and night guard. Although, you should already know that.”

“Michael...,” the bear murmured, pulling back from the rabbit's embrace to stare down at the guard quizzically. A quick scan proved his words to be true, and the usual smile lit up his face. “Ah, yes! Michael Afton, Jr. It is wonderful to make your acquaintance—I believe we will be seeing a lot of each other from now on.”

“You bet." Mike laughed, reaching up and giving the bear a firm pat on the arm. Even it wasn't his true friend in there, it was relieving to know the animatronic was still just as sweet.

“We thought we would take Freddy to see the new additions to the line-up,” the redhead explained, catching Michael's attention. He frowned slightly, recalling what he'd seen on the camera. “...Perhaps you should join us—there are some people taking flash photography in Pirate's Cove and Foxy looked a bit unsteady.”

Michael heaved a sigh. “Yeah, I'll come along... Wrangling the crowd is part of my job, after all.”

“Good thing, too; I know I’m supposed to help manage things, but I don’t think people will listen to me very much,” Charlie remarked, walking beside her old friend with a flash of disappointment that quickly turned into a teasing smile. “They're way more scared of Mikey over here!”

Bonnie couldn't exactly leave Bonnie Bowl when there were customers enjoying the games, and he’d already gotten in trouble for wandering today. With one lasting squeeze around his friend's hand, he felt that dull aching inside his chest—knowing full well that the inseparable human part of him wanted to ditch the bowling alley to follow his friends. “Come back soon, pal.”

“It's because you're too nice, Charlie,” Mike remarked as the group walked off, jamming the elevator button to take them back to the main area. “You've gotta put your foot down a little more—show people who's boss, you know?”

After a beat of silence, Freddy 2.0 looked down at the android inquisitively. “Michael, you are a head of security and night guard?”

The silent question clearly being: How in the world do you sleep with two equally taxing jobs?

“Mm-hmm,” Mike responded, stepping out as the doors opened with the animatronic close behind. “I'm kind of an insomniac, so—hey! Hands off the bear, ma'am!”

Michael's explanation was cut off as a rather enthusiastic mom tried to rush the bear and he physically stepped in her path, barring her from practically throwing her kid into Freddy's arms.

“Sorry!” Charlie said to the very impatient mother, the good-cop to Michael's bad-cop while proving his point from earlier. “Freddy's not doing photoshoots right now!”

It was so odd how popular all the Glamrocks were, to the point that her and Michael had to strong-arm people from knocking into the heavy robots and hurting themselves. After they shooed her away, much to the apparent chagrin of that particular mother, it seemed Michael's official guard outfit warded away the crazies in the crowd. Charlie made sure to tell the disappointed parent that both Foxy and Bonnie were available to play, and quickly rushed to move Freddy along towards Pirate's Cove. There, at least they could introduce Freddy to more kids in little increments.

Arriving to the attraction, one thing was obvious—Foxy was walking very strangely. Uneven in his gait as he finished up a story, even seeming somewhat twitchy to other kid's movements. His one eyepatch was flipped up, and the glow in his eyes was uneven. He’d clearly been flashed recently and was just trying to work through it, his optics unable to adjust to the ambient lighting in the room now.

“And that's the end of my tale! I hope you enjoyed it—I can't tell if you did. I also can't tell if anyone stayed or listened! 'Fraid my sight's gone with the tide...,” Foxy told the small gathering of youngsters who laughed at what they thought was just a quirky joke.

“Oh god…,” Michael groaned at the sight of the shambling pirate. He quickly hopped on the little dock that served as a stage, spouting instructions. “Freddy, take care of Foxy—uh, both Freds, please. Attention!”

Cupping his hands over his mouth, Mike yelled to the crowd. “Flash photography is not permitted in the Pizzaplex! It damages the animatronics and then they can’t mingle with the public! Plus—” A rather threatening smile spread across his face. “—anyone caught disobeying the rules is subject to be fined for repair costs!”

“My goodness…,” Freddy 2.0 murmured as he and his counterpart moved to Foxy’s side. “He is rather, ah… ruthless, is he not?”

“He is good at his job, that is for certain,” Freddy responded with a laugh, finally latching onto the pirate’s shoulder and looking up at him. “Hello, Foxy; it is Freddy and… Freddy! Let us lead you into the backroom while you regain your sight and we can introduce you properly…”

Anyone at that point who had their phones out was quick to shove them away inside a purse or pocket. The kids watched as both Freddies came to help Foxy down from the large boat back to the ground floor. Foxy raised his hook in the air in agreement with the security guard.

“Yeah! My eyeballs are sensitive, ya scallawags!” he confirmed, nearly doing a double take at the two sets of arms. He hoped that through combined intimidation, Foxy and Mike cemented the rules yet again for the few misbehaving parents.

Charlie was surprised at the odd amount of inconsiderate mothers and fathers. It was as if this place brought out their inner children in the worst ways. She heard one say as she passed them to help guide Foxy backstage: “We paid—we should be able to take as many pictures as we want…”

Which made the normally calm and reserved Charlie inhale sharply through her nose. Mike had already explained the situation to them, but she did mention to the father in passing: “Interacting with animatronics when they’re stationed in their attractions is free, sir. You just can’t take flash photos of them; as our head of security said, it hurts them.”

Charlie found that she and the others had to hurry Foxy along as quickly as possible before she fought the guy, the attitude rolling off of him as he openly complained about the policy of the store. Though she tried her best to ignore everyone and focused solely on helping Foxy to the backrooms. Once inside, the pirate gently felt around for both Freddies—his heroes for helping him down.

“Freddy? Thank you for being my seeing-eye bear… And Human. Heh heh…” He chuckled gratefully to himself. The blinded fox reached around once they stopped to hug the animatronic, happy to finally meet the bear version of his dearest friend.  

“I am here to help anytime, Foxy,” the bear reassured, quick to hug him back. Though this was their first meeting, he too felt like they’d been friends for years. “It is so nice to make your acquaintance; I am happy Samuel brought you into the lineup!”

“These people…,” Michael grumbled as he slipped into the back rooms shortly after the others. “I swear, if there’s trouble the parents are worse than the kids most of the time.”

His thoughts echoed Charlie’s, and Freddy had to concede as well. Ironically, despite the kids usually being the ones to physically cling to the animatronics, it was often their guardians who got the most aggressive when things didn’t go their way.

“We can take a rest back here until you reset, Foxy,” Freddy reassured, patting the pirate’s hook arm before looking up to his bear counterpart. “Then perhaps we can roam the Pizzaplex and try to find the other animatronics?”

Foxy was feeling a might dizzy after the paparazzi-like flashing he received upon his public debut. Though he wouldn’t lie, the blatant harassment did make him feel like a rockstar. “Thanks for the help—my optics will reset fully in just a few, then I can go back to my adoring fans.”

He certainly sounded like Roxy’s brother—even if he shared the same voice as Security Guard Mike…

“Oh, Fred! If you see Roxanne, will you tell her I stole her comb? She’ll be angry, but just say it was important. I didn’t have a teasing comb and needed one badly.” Despite being unable to see, Foxy plumped his long mane up with his more articulate hand. Soon, he was blinking in time again, lights in his eyes turning off and on again to signal his full reset. “Thanks you all! I feel much better now!”

“I will do my best to spare you from Roxanne’s wrath,” the bear laughed, watching to make sure Foxy reset properly.

Michael was doing the same, observing even more closely. He rocked back on his heels with a satisfied smile with the fox blinked in the familiar pattern. “Perfect! Ready to go back out? Oh, and feel free to tell people off if they try to use flash again. Note their faces and names too, if you would.”

Foxy stood, amazingly balanced with one inarticulate peg leg. He straightened up and made sure to pat Freddy's shoulder on his way past the small group.

“Aye—we'll all catch up after closing,” he assured his ursine friend. Looking to Michael, Foxy relaxed some with the express permission to speak his mind, and a surprising amount of self-awareness considering his short lifespan so far inside the Pizzaplex. “It's indeed fortuitous that I'm equipped with a profanity filter, First Mate Mike...”

Charlie laughed at this, attempting to hide her mouth slightly. “Just getting their customer profiles should be enough, Foxy. If you get really mad, go take a break—play the drums a little.”

Foxy smiled appreciatively, thanking the little team before heading back out into his Cove. With arms opened wide, he'd kick the swinging door open to catch the attention of the kids. Their cheers could be heard from down the hall now.

“I'm down to help Freddy acclimate to the Pizzaplex again! Where do you wanna go first, big guy?” Charlie asked the rockstar bear.

“Hmm…,” Freddy hummed in thought, tilting his head as he shuffled through all the attractions and animatronics he could visit. He wanted to see everyone in time, but one name stuck out from the rest in order of preference. “I think I would like to visit Chica, if that is alright.”

He’d never claim to like anyone more than the others, though it was no secret there was something about the original quartet that just had a special bond those made for the Pizzaplex wouldn’t quite understand.

Charlie quickly checked her phone, looking over the downloaded work schedule for all the characters at the Pizzaplex. “Roxy's doing make up tutorial's in the Salon for another 40 minutes. That'll give us enough time to swing by Mazercise and Monty golf!”

In agreement, the group quickly hurried for the door before the kids noticed he was leaving. Following behind the bear and Michael, Freddy slipped his arm through Charlie’s and grinned down at her.

“I think this is going quite well, do you agree?” he murmured under his breath, leaning close as they stepped into the ambient noise of the Pizzaplex’s atrium. There was a hint of fondness in those ice blue eyes as Freddy gazed up at his double. “He seems to be performing without a hitch, all things considered…”

All things considered, Charlie wasn't surprised at how well Freddy was acclimating. He was an agreeable person too, happy to listen to the management of this place. It shouldn't have been such a huge change for the last updated version of Freddy anyway—to him, the Pizzaplex only made some management updates and additions to their character lineups.

“Agreed,” Charlie whispered back. “Hopefully he doesn't ask too many questions about Vanessa or Sammy's 'kids' showing up out of nowhere... not to mention, y'know—us."

Charlie always felt a little weird when lying. Though this was obviously for Freddy's best interest to keep him in the dark. Eventually, when things were a little calmer there might be a good time to explain things. For now, they would be tight-lipped and give politely neutral answers for hard to answer questions. She loosely held to Freddy's arm, happy to walk beside him through the backrooms and reveling in how much better the Pizzaplex looked with patrons to populate its fun-filled corridors.

Freddy had a feeling his counterpart wouldn't pry too much. Without anything to be concerned with, nor a ghost subconsciously whispering in the back of his mind, the robot was quite amenable to whatever changes management dictated appropriate. Arm in arm with one of his dearest friends and a soft smile on his face, Freddy trailed along after the animatronic bear as he reacquainted himself with the Pizzaplex.

***

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#fnaf security breach #fnaf sb #fnaf #fnaf au #five nights at freddy's #michael afton #charlie emily #fanfic #fanfiction #ao3 #angelofrainfrogs #zeitghest #spend the night #going back #the wires that bind us au #gregory #glamrock freddy #glamrock foxy #glamrock bonnie #sammy emily

[marvelsbanner]

You come here often?

Prompt: Bruce x reader soulmate au where the first words your soulmate says to you appears on your body.

Pairing: Bruce Banner x reader 

Warnings: very slight angst (internal, self-doubt), like one curseword 

Word count: ~1400

A/N: Likes, reblogs, and feedback makes my heart happy <3 Not beta’d, all mistakes are my own! 

**i don’t own marvel** **not my gif** 

It wasn’t ideal, really. But it also could have been worse. He’d seen soulmate marks that were insults, curses- some really downright vile things, so it definitely could have been worse. That didn’t mean looking down to his wrist and seeing the words “That physically hurt me” didn’t fill his chest with anxiety. 

He’s hurt a lot of people in his lifetime. A walking mass of destruction with no limits, a time bomb of green that seemed to go off at all the wrong times. 

He couldn’t imagine getting the privilege of meeting his soulmate only to hurt him or her, to see the utter fear in their eyes that he’s seen in so many others. To cause them pain by his actions, to have to live with himself after it- what if it was bad? What if those were the last words they would speak not only to him, but to anyone at all?

The thought of it alone kept him up some nights- a faceless body puppeteering his dreams, causing him to wake up sweaty and breathless and a little green around the edges.

He usually kept a wristwatch over the words, it wasn’t uncommon for people to keep their marks private. Less likely that someone twisted would try to fake a meeting. The only person he had shown was Tony, who tried his best to calm his anxieties (His own wrist had Pepper’s iconic “Wow, you really are an asshole”  after coming for an interview and finding him half naked and hungover in his office. They had been happily married for two years now) 

So, he tried not to worry- he really did, but every time he would take his watch off to sleep or shower the harsh black words on his wrist made his head spin with the possibilities of what was to come. 

-

He hated parties. Didn’t matter the occasion. Being in a loud, crowded room with warm bodies and fake smiles dripping with complementary liquor- it made him and the other guy incredible antsy. 

Despite knowing how much Bruce despised parties, and the threat that he was putting everyone in attendance in, Tony managed to drag him to nearly every single event he hosted. 

This time it was a charity event, Stark Enterprise making some big donation to a charity to clean up a little of the bad publicity and backlash the last Avengers battle had created. 

That being so, alongside his teammates was a pool of unfamiliar faces. He nursed his drink and surveyed the room, heart pounding as his feet did an antsy shuffle. 

Steve and Bucky were playing pool against Sam and Natasha, Thor and Rhodey were trading stories with important looking men in crisp suits, Pepper was making small talk with some of the women from the charity board, and Tony was no where to be found; ultimately, Bruce was on his own. 

Logically, he knew that, and yet he had the feeling that he wasn’t. He felt a pair of eyes on him from the side, and turned to see a pretty woman sitting at the bar, nursing a drink and stealing a glance at him. 

She gave a polite smile before ducking her head and turning away, clearly not expecting to have been caught. Or- maybe she had wanted to be caught? He wasn’t very good with these kinds of things. 

“That’s Y/N Y/L/N, she works on the head committee of the charity.” Tony says, appearing seemingly out of nowhere and making Bruce nearly spill his drink. “Jesus Tony- don’t sneak up on me like that,” he yelped, running his hands through his hair and trying to calm his raising pulse. Tony simply ignored him and continued speaking.

“Spoken with her a few times- super nice, uses big words I don’t understand. Right up your ally,” he said with a wink. “Go talk to her” he ordered, giving him a slight shove in her direction. 

“No- no! Tony, I don’t.. I don’t think that’s a good idea,” He fought, before Tony interrupted him- “Uh uh, no if ands or buts mister, I’m tired of seeing you sulking at these things.  She’s smart. She’s pretty. You’re smart. You look half way decent cleaned up, go talk to her.” and with a final shove from Tony he decided to give in, blowing out a sigh and downing the rest of his drink. 

He tried to calm his heart rate as ran his fingers through his unruly hair, wishing he had put a little more effort into getting ready today. He slowly made his way to stand by the bar where the woman was sitting, giving her a shy smile as she turned to acknowledge his presence. 

Panic. Panic. Panic. “So, uh, you come here often?” He stuttered out, immediately cringing and wishing he was still in his bed- or curled up in a ditch and dead, whichever would come quicker. God, he couldn’t believe he just said that!

She snorted into her drink, nose scrunching into a cringe and she shook her head at his awful line,

“That physically hurt me. Ouch, oh god you really need to work on your flirting skills, if that’s what that even was.” She started laughing before turning her head to meet his stunned gaze, his jaw practically on the floor.

“You’ll catch flies like that” she chuckles nervously. 

“S-sorry, I just, can you say that again?” He stutters out. 

“You’ll catch flies..?” 

“No no, before that. You- you said I hurt you.” 

“Oh, I meant- I didn’t mean- its just a saying,” she tries to explain before he cuts her off.

“No no, I get that, I just..” He quickly undoes his watch and turns over his wrist, showing the dark black words matching her exact phrasing. Her own jaw drops this time, eyes going wide before her mouth snaps shut and she gives him the smallest smile. She turns over her own wrist, the words reading “So, you come here often?” and he laughs, he laughs with a big dopey smile on his face- almost afraid to believe this could actually be happening.

“You’re not the first guy to say that to me, but you’re the only guy who’s had my words in return” She says with a smile. 

“God I- I’m so sorry you had to go for so many years with that god awful pickup line on your wrist” he laughs. 

“No I’m sorry you had to walk around with my words, I’m sure you’ve gotten some weird looks for that one,” she replies. He gives her an almost sad smile, “I was the only one who seemed to be concerned”

Her face slightly falls before she composes it, holding out her hand for him to shake, “Y/N” she introduces herself. 

“Bruce” he replies with a small smile. 

“So, do you come here often?” She says with a smirk. 

He gives a chuckle, “Yeah, yeah actually. I live right upstairs and am usually forced to attend these things by our generous host.” he says with a chuckle.

“You live in the tower? What are you, an avenger?” She jokes, clearly teasing before his face answered the question for him. “Oh shit, you’re actually an avenger. Are you the one in the star spangled spandex or the big green one?” She teases, but she could see his shoulders tense. 

“Yeah, that would be me. The big ugly green one” 

She frowns at his choice of words and tone, “Hey, I never said ugly. I always thought that guy was ruggedly handsome in a strange, green sort of way” 

He puffs out a breath and shakes his head. 

“What?” She asks, shoving his shoulder with her own. 

“I uh, I have a kind of.. complicated life. I was honestly expecting you to run at the first mention of the big guy,” He took a deep breath before continuing, “I uh, I was always worried that the first words spoken to me by my soulmate would be after he had hurt them somehow.” He finally raised his head to meet her eyes, expecting hesitancy or fear- and yet her eyes were free from judgment. 

“Well, they weren’t. Just tipsy teasing. And I’m not planning on running yet, but we did just meet. Buy me a drink and maybe I’ll change my mind afterwards” she said with a wink, and all he could do was give her a dopey smile in return. There she was, this beautiful, sharp-witted girl that he was so worried he would scare off, subtly doing her best to make sure he was at ease. 

“Yeah, yeah I’ll buy you a drink. On one condition.” He said to her.

“And what is that?” She asked, quirking one brow. 

“Go to dinner with me tonight.” He said smoothly. 

Her lips quirked into a small smile, “I’ll be there” 

He smiled and signaled for the bartender to fill up their glasses as he slid into the seat next to her, brushing his shoulder against hers with a playful smile. 

#my writing #my fics #Bruce Banner #doctor banner #professor hulk #the hulk #hulk #bruce banner x reader #bruce banner x you #bruce banner x y/n #bruce banner x fem!reader #hulk x reader #hulk x you #hulk x y/n #avengers x reader #avengers x you #avengers x y/n #avengers x fem!reader #mcu #marvel #marvel fanfic #avengers fanfic #avengers fanfiction #avengers #the avengers #doctor dilf

[forthehpfanboys]

Tan Lines

Pair: George Weasley x Reader; he/him.

Summary: George didn’t tell anyone; Fred just figured it out and then Fred told you. It was quiet simple.  So, you take some time to appreciate the younger prankster.

Warnings: SMUT (MDI), Dirty talk/praise, bite kink cause yES but probably TRASH. If I forgot any, please dm me.

Notes: Top reader, by the waayyy

~DO NOT REPOST ANYWHERE~

-

George never liked admitting that he, sometimes, didn’t feel special. Sometimes, he felt trapped in his ever so slightly older brother's shadow-after all, Fred does initiate a lot of the pranks they were famous for before leaving Hogwarts. Fred got a lot of the credit and praise and was always the ever so slightly louder one. After all, it was always Fred and George, never the other way around. It was never Fred's fault, he did try to give the younger twin credit where credit was due, but it was like people didn't care. They were identical, basically one person to most, why did it matter who came up with one prank?

While he never voiced it to Fred, George was sure he knew. He could probably tell from his sad eyes or sleepless nights alone. George wasn’t exactly surprised when it happened, but appreciated the little compliments his twin would give him, whether it was over something as simple as tying his own tie on the first try. It was thoughtful.

While Fred had tried to help his brother by himself, you remained clueless and left out of the loop, much to George’s relief. George didn’t want you worrying yourself with his feelings and being stressed over something like this when they had the whole shop to handle. You didn’t know of his internal battle with self worth or how he was coping with it, that was, until-

“Georgie’s been feeling kinda shitty lately.”

“Wait, he’s been what?” Your voice carried easily in the empty shop. Maybe now was a bad time to tell you, Fred thought as he watched you juggle the boxes in your arms. You were helping the older shop owner stock the shelves while George took a quick break and headed down Diagon Alley for supplies. You managed to balance the bulky box on top of the counter before turning to the twin sheepishly rubbing the back of his neck.

“I stated that poorly.” He looked down at his shoes. “It’s nothing too bad, just… He’s just been feeling, I don’t know, lack luster lately.” The tall male moved to fiddled with an arrangement close enough to keep up the conversation. “He didn’t want me to say anything, doesn’t want you worrying and all.”

“He told you before he told me?” You watched his now shaky hands inspect a love potion before quickly setting it down.

“No, he didn’t tell me. The bags under his eyes, the fake smile, the sudden quietness told me enough.” Fred shrugged like it was nothing. “No offense, but I thought you would’ve noticed.” He turned back to you, staring into your eyes for anger.

“I did, he just told me he wasn’t feeling well. Figured it was a bug- Why isn’t he telling me all this?” You chewed on your lip. You’d been dating the younger twin since Hogwarts, 5th year, actually. You thought he would’ve said something. Maybe he had and you missed it? Maybe he thought you’d make fun of him. 

“Doesn't want you to worry yourself sick over something you can’t contro-” Fred whipped around to the door when it swung open, revealing George with his arms full of veils, bottles and tiny bags and boxes. How he managed to balance it, neither of you knew, but you both surged forward to help split up the load. “Georgie, mate, you were supposed to grab a few things from Slug and Jiggers, not buy the whole bloody store!” Fred laughed out, hoping he didn’t notice the conversation he just stumbled into.

“Well, you know how it is. Ideas came flooding in once I was inside the shop!” George stepped in deeper, allowing the door to shut behind him. He looked between the two of you when an awkward silence filled itself between gaps. “What did I miss?” He cocked an eyebrow when Fred slowly backed away.

“Nothing, lil’ brother. Don’t worry about it.” With that, he turned around and scurried to the back of the store. Once he got to the door hiding the supplies and stock, he kicked it open and rushed in. Neither of you flinched when the door slammed shut. 

George just shrugged, shaking his head as he set the rest of the newest products he splurged on down onto the till counter. He sorted through them quickly, his hands moving with precision, but it began to dwindle when he felt an unmoving gaze on him. He slowly turned to see you standing there, arms still full, just kind of gazing at him.

“What?” He blinked a few times, ideas shifting behind his eyes faster than firebolts. “Come on, doll, use your words.” He laughed gently, turning back to the products, gripping one of the veils and staring at it as he thought.  Did he miss a special day? No, he was pretty good with remembering dates. Maybe? “Um- Happy birthday?” He smiled at you, his neck muscles tightening when the smile turned into an awkward grimace when you didn’t smile back. He quickly turned to one of the aisles to grab one of the many firework boxes piled high.

”Why didn’t you tell me?” Your eyes hardened a tiny bit as George scoffed, keeping his back toward you. Was he really going to act like nothing happened? You dumped the stuff in your arms carelessly onto the counter before turning to him once again. Now he was fiddling with the thin but colorful box, choosing to not face you.

“What are you talking about, love?” He let out a soft chuckle that couldn’t sound any faker. George now knew that you knew, but he wasn’t going to give it to you that easily. He couldn’t admit it. He had pride. The co-owner heard your footsteps coming up behind him, but did nothing to change the distance. 

“Georgie.” Your arms wrapped around his waist as your soft voice fluttered from your lips. Your chest pressed against his back, allowing you to press a kiss to your shoulder. “You can tell me anything, I can keep a secret.” You casted him a soft smile, silently begging him to share the thoughts plaguing his mind. However, he didn’t turn to you. Instead, he just ducked his head down, setting the firework box out of place on the shelf. 

“Just feelin’ down, is all.” He shrugged, forgetting you were against him for a solid second before turning his head to look at you. He opened his mouth, but found his words dying before they reached his tongue. He could see the worry, the anxiety behind your eyes and he felt a coldness come across his chest. The tall red-head let out another sigh. “Ok..” He whispered, struggling to find his voice. “Just.. Feeling less than worth all of this.”

“Go on.” You encouraged quietly, turning him around so he didn’t have to crane his neck to see you. He pulled you close into his chest, hiding his head against the base of your neck as he slowly spoke about his insecurities.

Before he knew it, George’s sentences were falling apart and fielding soft sniffles. His grip on you tightened, looking for something to anchor him to a kind reality. Saying everything out loud made it feel so real compared to it just being it his head. Once you were sure he had nothing else to say, you took the reins on the conversation.

“I wish you would’ve told me sooner, bunny.”

“Please, don’t call me that-” George whispered back against your skin, a weak chuckle escaping his lips before he fell silent again. He shifted on the balls of his feet as he pressed his face harder against your skin.

“Hush, bun. You need to know that you're amazing.” You ran your hands across his shoulder blades before they traveled to hold his waist. “Seriously- you stood up against a bright pink power-hungry toad, had the best exit known to Hogwarts history and made your dreams a reality.” You kissed his ear gently. “Sure, some of it was Fred, sure some of it was both of you, but I can count many times you blew away the crowd, just like he did.”

Your heart stuttered a little when George lifted his head to look at you. He had the biggest puppy dog eyes and he didn’t even notice. You found yourself getting lost from his somewhat still sad gaze.

“Really?”

“Alright, since you don’t believe me, I’ll show you.” You stepped away from the precious hug and grabbed his wrist, swiftly spinning around and heading for the flat just up the stairs. The sudden shift in tone had George’s head spinning.

“What?” He choked out, stumbling behind you to try to keep up. He noticed from the corner of his eye, Fred sneaking behind the shelves and sprinting out of the shop. The older twin knew what this meant and it had the younger one blushing a deeper shade of red than his hair. 

“I’m gonna show you how amazing you are.” You spun around, pushing open the door to the flat and dragging him inside. You shut the door behind him and spun him back around before landing a soft kiss to his lips. He let out the softest swooning noise you’d ever heard and smiled into the kiss. Your thumb rubbed along the protruding vein on his wrist while your other hand slowly wrapped around his waist and tugged his body closer to yours. 

You pulled from the kiss and pulled the male closer, if it was possible. The hand on his wrist trailed up to his bicep, squeezing it gently before going up to his shoulder. You watched him shiver, his cheeks a soft pink from the kiss alone. You let out a breathy chuckle, your lips still close to his, allowing him to feel the puffs of air fan across his lips. 

“Will you let me?” Your hands moved to the tie around his neck, slowly undoing it before letting it fall to the floor. Your nimble fingers then moved to the buttons of his dress shirt when he finally nodded his head. You pressed your lips against him again  and pushed the shirt off his shoulders allowing it to fall to the ground. Your hands trailed down along his chest and down his sides before moving back up. You savored every shiver and goosebump appearing on his skin. “Let’s head to the bedroom, yeah?” 

“Please.”  George smiled a little when you let out a soft laugh.

Soon enough, George found himself laying back on his bed, your hand down his trousers. He let out a whine when your palm slid across his dick, his eyelids fluttering shut as your lips trailed along his neck. He jumped when you bit along the side, his free hand coming to the back of your head, gripping your hair tightly.

“Sorry.” You mumbled against his skin, licking across the already bruising skin. He let out a breathy moan of your name when you sucked a spot against his jugular. 

"No, you're not. " he laid his head back, softly bucking his hips upward against your hand. "I know you like marking me up." he gripped your hair tighter, his lip trapped between his teeth. 

"Ha, yeah." You snorted against his skin, pulling back to look at the marks scattered across his skin. You moved to his shoulder, creating another hickey as your hand trailed up his bare stomach. “You know you're beautiful, right? Like,” you paused to think, your tongue trailing across the speckles in his skin, “You’re freckles remind me of stars.” You knew he was blushing, you could feel it. He always melted because of your compliments and it was precious. 

He shuddered against the bed when your nails dragged downward across his toned stomach. You’ve said it once, probably, and you’d say it again, but bless quidditch. You pressed another kiss to his shoulder before latching your mouth to his collarbone. 

“Stop teasing me, (Y/n/n)! Come on!” George gripped your hair tighter, his free hand shooting straight between your legs and cupping your own hard-on. Neither of you had taken off any other clothes except for George’s belt. You chuckled against this pale skin and sat up, straddling the male quickly to tug off your shirt. 

“Alright, Georgie, alright! I just wanted you to take it slow tonight.” You laughed while his hands found your waist. 

“You can do that by going quickly.” George’s hands found your belt, basically ripping it free and throwing it across the room behind him. His pale hands unbuttoned your slacks and tried to tug them out. 

“Georgie, that takes away the whole point.” You stood up on the bed, one foot resting against each side of his hip, slipping your slacks and boxers down. You stepped out of them, throwing them over Georgie's head to land with your belt. You jumped off the bed, causing your partner to let out a laugh. “Don’t say a word.” You pointed at the ginger, a playful glare across your lips.

You watched George’s big hands fumble with his own pants before ripping them free. That was when you noticed how his skin on his arms and legs were slightly darker than his chest. The freckled covered bloke had tan lines and not even those could hide the marks you left behind. Fred would probably be able to see said marks tomorrow. 

“Like the view, love?” He asked, cockiness overflowing in his voice. 

“Of course, sunshine.” You walked back over to the male, running your hand down his chest as you climbed onto the bed. George spread his legs to accommodate you between them and wrapped them around your waist. Your hands moved to his thighs before trailing up to his hips. “How do you wanna do this?”

“Just spell me ready. You’ve been going on for too long. I’d like to shag you while you're hard, y'know?” The red-head grasped your hands tightly, his hips bucking up against yours for emphasis. 

 “Godric, George. I adore you.” You whispered against his lips. You let go of one of his hands to seamlessly pull your wand out of nowhere and mumbled a few spells under your breath. "Oops, sorry!" you spoke out when he gasped and stiffened on the bed. "Um, it's gonna be cold."

"Yup, I got that."

"Hey, don't sass me!" You slapped his thigh playfully. You cupped the back of his knees and lifted his legs up to wrap snuggly around your waist. It was amusing to see the tall man chewing on his lip in desperation for you. "Ready?" 

"Oh, no. Give me a minute." he was back to his sassy self, which had you chuckling silently. "We can just spend the next 20 minutes staring into each othhhmm-" you decided to shut him up by slowly pushing into him. You watched him toss his head back and moan when your hips finally touched his. 

"Gonna keep giving me sass?" 

"If it gets you to fuck me faster, then yeah." His voice was breathy and his hand was gripping yours harder. His Adam's apple bobbed in his throat as he swallowed hard. The ginger had forgotten how good you felt inside him and it was all just crashing down on him. 

You shook your head, your laugh now becoming audible. You ground your hips into his, your own groan leaving your lips while his legs tightened aorun dyour waist. Pulling your hips back slowly, you leaned over, your chest touching his, Your hands gripped onto his and hold them beside his head. You shushed him when he complained about going too slow and bucked upwards to meet your slow thrusts. 

“Just enjoy it, love.” Your breath casted across his ear as you spoke, causing goosebumps to pop up on his skin. The ginger melted into the mattress, his bottom lip stuck between his teeth, holding back his whines. While you were moving slowly, you didn’t exactly press into the male softly. You wanted to pour your soul into everything you gave him.

The posts of the bed collided with the wall with each slow hit and George found himself suddenly grateful the shop was empty- you could probably hear it through the thin walls of the flat. George let out a sob when you angled your hips just right, his legs, somehow, tightening around your hips. 

“I love seeing you like this, babe. All spread out and taking me so well. Absolutely breathtaking, huh?” Your mouth was George’s biggest weakness. You grinned when he nodded his head quickly, his chest stuttering while another moan escaped into the room. “Just relax and feel me, love.”

The ginger could feel all of you, every twitch, every vein, every inch. He didn’t know if he should focus on your teeth and lips creating marks across his shoulders and neck, or every noise he managed to drag out of you, or the feel of your hips slowly pushed into him. He was slowly turning into a shuddering mess. 

“Fuck (Y/n).” He whined out, his back arching when you pushed into him particularly hard. He could feel a warm pool of precum dripping right below his belly button. He tried to remember a time he leaked this much and came up blank, or maybe his brain was starting to short circuit.

“Shh, love. I got you.” Your nose nuzzled just under his jaw, leaving a soft kiss against his skin. Your hand trailed down his arm and traveled down his body before wrapping around his sensitive cock, jerking it in time with your hips and twisting right at the head. “So good for me, Georgie, so perfect, so wonderful.” Your lips moved to press a soft kiss against his cheek. 

“Fuck, (Y/n), I’m-” His breath caught again when you moved both your hips and your hand faster. 

“Don’t hold back.” You licked your lips. Soon enough, George was crying out, his hand gripping the sheets hard enough to make the veins in his arms pop up while his entire body went stiff. Your hips slowed to a stop, but your hand kept going, allowing the male to ride out his orgasm. “That’s it, good boy.”

Once the freckle covered male was gasping from overstimulation, you let go of him and slowly pulled out and laid next to him.  You watched his face while your arms rubbed his shoulders. He let out a sigh as he melted into the plush bed once again, every ounce of tension leaving his body.

“Do you feel better, Geo?” Your eyes trailed along his muscular shoulders covered in bite marks and hickies and felt pride swell in your chest. Your thumb swept across a particularly deep bite, causing your partner to jump.

“A little bit.” He smiled at you, his eyes filled with love and pure admiration. “I’m sorry I didn’t say anything sooner. I thought I could handle the baggage myself.” He reached over to cup your cheek.

“When are you gonna learn you don’t have to carry it yourself?” You asked, leaning into the touch. His hands were rough and calloused but the gentleness of the touch had you swooning.

“Probably when the baggage almost kills me.” He snickered, leaning in to press his lips against yours. His lips were, surprisingly, not as chapped as yours. You both grinned into the kiss. His hand moved from your cheek to the back of your neck as he deepened the kiss. George was the first one to pull away.

“I love you so much, George. Seriously, you’re so perfect and wonderful and other adjectives that mean great and Godric.” You cupped both of his cheeks, planting a swift kiss against his swollen lips.

“I love you more, and if you give me a minute, I’ll prove it.”

“Godric, this is why I adore you.” and with that, you slammed your lips against his.

The next morning, George came out of the bedroom, a new prep in his step. He was practically skipping around the kitchen, almost missing his red-headed counterpart.

“So, feeling better after your alone time with (Y/n)?” Fred asked as he leaned against the counter, a smirk hidden behind the rim of his tea cup.

“Yeah, we managed to talk everything out and I do feel better.” George stretched his arms above his head before pouring himself a cup of tea, and turning to his snickering brother. “What?”

“Nothing, but just a fair warning, you should most definitely wear a turtleneck before showing yourself in the shop.” Fred pointed to his neck and shoulders before putting his tea cup in the sink. “Maybe make it less obvious you got something other than stocking shelves done last night.”

“Shut it, Fred.”

#george weasley x male reader #george weasley imagine #george weasley #george weasley smut #male reader #x male reader #hp imagine #hp x male reader #fred weasley #Ronny Writes #fic #hp male fic #hp fic

[kraiyan]

i made my own little headcannons to fit in if michael and jeremy were dating and a bunch of other stuff that i don’t want to spoil so take my headcannons and please don’t pay attention to my overuse of the words ‘so’ and ‘like’

i wrote this headcannons for me in my notes so there are mentions of panic/anxiety attacks, light mentions of an eating disorder, nightmares, and self harm but i’ll just put a trigger warning for when those parts show up and if i missed anything that is triggering please let me know

- michael is trans and gay and jeremy is bisexual

- i think they would’ve been friends since kindergarten so they grew up telling each other EVERYTHING

- i feel like michael was really girly as a kid but in like 6th grade he just completely switched to like tomboy but he didn’t do on purpose it just happened

- then in seventh grade michael told jeremy he wanted to be a boy then after that with help from jeremy he came out to his moms

- michael had a crush in jeremy since 7th grade but i don’t think jeremy was his first crush

- i think since michael was straight when he was a girl he just assumed he was straight as a boy and his sexual awakening was captain sparklez

- michael has two moms and jeremys mom would’ve died in a car accident so it’s just him and his dad

- i imagine they confessed to each other in their second year of high school

- (TW: mentions of abuse) jeremy realized he liked michael in freshman year and it was really bad he could not stop thinking about him so when he got squip squip l would not stop punishing him for it

- so jeremy definitely has some problems with his bisexuality

- after years of pining for each other when they finally kissed jeremy could not stop panicking about it

- like they went to sleep fine but he was internally panicking and he tried to keep it together but the next day he absolutely broke just started sobbing saying over and over again “is this okay, are we okay”

- michael is the type to listen to a vulgar music to help his dysphoria

- so him and jeremy are in his car michael plugs in his phone and just starts singings “hoes want to be seen with me and i like their big thick titties”

- and jeremy can do nothing else but be like michael what the fuck

- they decided to keep their relationship a secret and not tell anyone bc of jeremy still coming to terms with himself and he didn’t think his dad would understand

- but i feel like michael moms had already pieced together that they were dating and jeremy didn’t mind that they knew bc they’re literally lesbians but every time jeremy came over from that point forward they had to keep their door open

-(TW: mention of an eating disorder) in a different angstier au jeremy would struggle with eating as a control thing after squip

- (TW: mention of an eating disorder) in an angstier au michael would have an eating disorder cause dysphoria

- i feel like once he realized he was trans he had really bad dysphoria but like with therapy and stuff he got over it

- so i think michael really liked afycso and had it on a vinyl and now jeremy knows all the words

- they don’t do anything at school because jeremy is still uncomfortable so they just pursuit their relationship between closed doors and michaels car in an empty parking lot

- i feel like they both got really excited when michael got referred to as sir for the first time

- jeremy and michael grew up together but ironically when puberty hit michael started to wear baggy clothes than he wore a binder than he wore super baggy clothes to hide his tits after coming out but during squip he had time to self reflect and work on his dysphoria so when jeremy saw michael outside of school he kinda said TITS and was so caught off guard by them

-(TW: mentions of self harm scars) i think michael has sh scars due to losing his childhood best friend and the whole panic attack in the bathroom thing and jeremys seen them but didn’t bring it up to michael because they’re fading so he obviously doesn’t do it anymore but it was a huge shock for jeremy to find out

- they never brought it up tho and it was never discussed bc who cares it was in the past

- michael pants his nails black and i think on some very rare occasion jeremy would paint his nails too (like the way karl paint his) and michael has lots of nail polish cuz on the rare occasion he paints his nails different colors and he repainted his nails every two weeks

- no matter how many times michael has changed in the same room as jeremy even let jeremy help take off his binder jeremy will never not get shy when he changes and will always ask to go into another room

- jeremy is a coffee person but not hot coffe because he always drinks it too early and burns his tongue

- he originally bought his hoodie™️ in really huge size to battle dysphoria but that just made the hoodie last for years

- jeremys name in michaels phone is something very gay and lovey and shit and michaels name on jeremys phone is just michael :)

- jeremy would come home all suspicious and and red faced after him and michael came from an empty parking lot that his dad would not stop begging him to meet this girlfriend of his

- i don’t think jeremy told his dad him and michael were playing a game or something and they kiss jeremys dad comes in and is like what 😦

-and his dad is shocked that he has been pushing girlfriend but he has a boyfriend and is just soooooo awkward about it and never sees michael the same but never makes any rules about them bc he doesn’t want to be homophobic 😭

- i don’t think he was really not supportive but it took him a bit to get used to it but it was so new to him and he was just so phased he just kinda talked to jeremy about his sexuality then left it at that

- they are like gendebend bubbline (marshal lee and the other one yk)

- michael has a queen vinyl the listen to a lot

- so i think michael would still smoke a bit and one time he convinced jeremy to do it with him and jeremy mainly coughed a lot then they just made out the rest of the time but they didn’t tell their parents they would be staying out after school and they both got in trouble

- michael gets blue raspberry and jeremy gets cherry but he also gets coke sometimes too (slushy flavors)

- at the beginning of their relationship they had to take it really slow so that jeremy would feel coqmfortable

- (TW: mentions of panic attacks) so jeremy has nightmares of squip and he wakes up having panic attacks and it’s really tiring bc he only gets 2 hours of sleep if he has these nightmares

- (TW: mentions of panic attacks) i feel like along with his nightmares he also had panic attacks that squip would punish him for pursuing a relationship with a guy let alone michael

- so after he got over his nightmares he just struggled with sleeping and nighttime in general like just fear around going to sleep

- so he often stayed up alll night to avoid sleeping and would like go to bed at 6 or on a good day 4 or 5

- so i think to get over his fear he had to make a routine first he would make some sort of hot drink or just water (mostly sleepy time tea) then he would text michael that he was going to sleep he also wears the same pajamas every time he goes to sleep just to make sure the routine really works then lastly he reads a comic book then he goes to bed

- i think the reason jeremy couldn’t sleep well after getting over the nightmares is because even if squip doesn’t haunt him enough to show up in his dreams anymore it still haunts him enough to stress him out constantly so he doesn’t sleep well

- to conclude the nightmare and sleeping saga jeremy basically has a night routine and sleeps with a night light

- i feel like they both go to therapy but we’re to scared to tell each other (and they both started going to therapy before they started dating)

- so fast forward they’re dating and are trying to plan a date and jeremys like i’m busy on monday at 1 and my dad needs me to help him with something on tuesday so how about wednesday at 3 and michaels like i have somewhere to be like at 3:30 and jeremys like where do you have to be and michaels like where do YOU have to be and so they count to three and say where they’re going to be and they both say therapy and then they’re like you go to therapy i think that would be so cute

- so michael has really thick glasses like his vision is awful so if jeremy is mad at michael he would wake up early and move his glasses over so michael would have to struggle to get out of bed and look for them with his poor ass vision

- he can see things right in front of his face but as soon as it moves a bit too far it’s blurry

- and speaking of his galsses if they’re really kissing along the way jeremy would take of his glasses so they could get closer to each other’s faces (like how elle and tao do in heartstopper )

- michael and jeremy have been friends way too long to not have practiced kissing with each other

- i think christine was a long time crush for jeremy so he definitely practiced kissing michael a lot since they were in 6th grade and michael was just soaking that shit up

- he’d be like what if she wants to make out we should practice that and jeremys like oh yeah you’re right and michael would be so freaking happy

- but they definitely got caught by jeremys dad and he laughed it off cause what else are you meant to when your 11 year old son and his 12 year old best friend are kissing each other

- they didn’t do it anymore after that cause they were soooooooooo embarrassed

- so i don’t talk about the rest of the characters but i’m about to make a headcannon including them so i’m gonna say my headcannons

- so chole is demisexual and panromantic

- brooke is a lesbian

- rich is bisexual and trans

- jake is pan

- jenna is questioning or straight

- and christine is aro/ace

- so i think jeremy and christine dated for a bit then christine broke up with him cause she was all like i can see the way you look at michael and also because she realized she was feeling intense platonic attraction not romantic

- and also i think they’re all friends so they have a group chat where they send homework answers and stuff

- so i think one time jeremy is doing his nighttime routine but this particular night he’s really tired so he texts michael goodnight bby <3 love u then skips the comic book reading and goes to bed but he sent it to their group chat so as soon as he got situated into bed all he hears is his phone going off so he has to check and it’s just everyone freaking out

- so he like fully sits up is looking at his phone in complete shock then realizes he never said a name so they are like who’s this mystery girl

- so he calls michael tells him about the situation then decides he’s ready to come out

- so the next day they’re more handsy then usual like jeremy wiped something off his face michael saw that he was cold and pulled him real close and their friends are like okayyyyy

- but mind you christine knew that jeremy liked michael so she knew exactly what was happening

- so at the end of the day their friend group is making plans to hang out but everyone was busy so jeremy goes well i’ll see you guys tomorrow waves at everyone kisses michael then starts walking to his house then michaels like yea i’m gonna head home to and like drives away and from that day forward their friends would not stop teasing them and were impressed they could keep there secret for so long

- so i feel like michaels moms both have jobs that run late so mom #1 is an er nurse and mom #2 is an account so this leaves michael a lot of time of being alone in his house so naturally you need to take advantage

- so one time mom #2 gets home and walks in just to see jeremy fully on the counter making out with her son

- i don’t think they got in trouble but his mom was like please not on the counter

- and then there was another time where mom #1 came home on her break cause she doesn’t live far from the er so she like yells to michael that she’s home

- and so naturally you come down to hug your mom so he comes down to greet his mom with a red faced jeremy behind him and his mom thought this was so fucking funny but as soon as she’s done laughing she immediately goes anytime jeremys over the doors open and that was the end of it

- everyone has this one thing that someone does that make them all blushy and stuff

- for jeremy it’s when michael wears fitting clothes cause michael is known to wear hoodies or just baggy clothes in general so when michael does get hot and needs to like put something on he puts on one of those body fitting v necks and jeremy losses his shit like he’s fully blushing and avoiding eye contact and since michael changed cause he was hot he’s sure that jeremy is so hot that his face is turning red and he’s embarrassed to say to take off his cardigan so the entire time jeremy is being full homo for his boyfriend michael is thinking he’s about to pass out from a heat stroke

- so i think jeremy enjoys this so much that for the first week of spring michael will only wear fitted clothes because jeremy loves it

- for michael it’s when he’s kissing jeremys neck and jeremy runs his hand thru his hair and pulls it a little when this happens michael loses all common sense one because jeremys enjoying himself so much that he has to kinda tug on michaels hair and two he’s enjoying it so much he doesn’t have time to think that squip is going to punish him and that makes michael just lose his mind so by the time they’ve pulled apart jeremy as sooooo many hickies and they both look at each other like what the fuck did we just do

- moving right along i feel like when jeremy wakes up at night and is terrified to go back to sleep if him and michael are sleeping together he will like hug him until he gets back to sleep and it works every time

- when they were like 7 jeremy got really sick with the flu and michael was so scared that he was going to die so he kissed him while he was sleeping because if his best friend was gonna die so was he and the next day he got really sick with the flu and jeremy would not stop crying because he thought that since michael refused to leave his side he got him sick…they’re idiots

- jeremy is the type to go to school with the worst fever ever he could throw up in the middle of the school day and still not go to the nurse and if he got sick during junior year forget it you had to strap him down to his bed if you wanted him to take a day off like michael had to sedecue him into staying in bed and taking medication so that he could feel better

#be more chill #boyf riends #bmc #bmc headcanons #bmc michael #bmc jeremy

[randomtasteinfandoms]

Control| Stefan Butler {Bandersnatch}

summary| stefan feels like he’s being controlled, you have to help him take that control back.

Entering through the front door of the house Stefan shares with his father, you have deja vu to the last however many months since Stefan's meeting with Tuckersoft. The house was quiet and still, Stefan's father already had left for work leaving the two of you alone.

     The only noises coming from his bed room was the clacking of Stefan's fingers on his keyboard and the scratching of his pencil on the notebook paper, as well as the soft turning back of forth of the pages of Bandersnatch which you read while laying, stomach first, on Stefan's bed. You didn't mind sitting in silence with Stefan day after day, it was better then not seeing him at all which is what would happen if you didn't join him in his room everyday. Everyday is always the same. You come to Stefan's late in the morning, mainly so you avoid his father, you bring him breakfast/lunch depending on the day, Stefan spends every waking hour programming and reading and re-reading the book. You don't mind, in fact, you like being there. And if we're being honest, you were scared to leave him alone. You're the only one who can get him to do anything outside of his game. Only you can get him to eat, only you can get him to calm down when the game crashes, only you can get him to take breaks and lye in bed with you and breath.

   For as long as you've known Stefan, he's always been an anxious and fidgety person. Weather that meant biting his nails or pulling on his earlobe, you always thought it was something he did subconsciously to ease anxiety, however as weeks continued to pass you began to notice him not doing these ticks anymore and found him folding his hands under his arms, as if to keep him from doing them.

   Right now was no different. The two of you sat in his father's car, parked on the curb just outside of your home. You had persuaded Stefan into driving you home as a means of getting him out of his desk chair. Asking for a ride was the easiest way to get Stefan away from the game, as if he didn't you'd be force to take public transportation. You were pulled from your thoughts and your humming of which ever Thompson Twins song was currently playing on the radio when you hear the shifting of Stefan in the drivers seat besides you. Your head was quick to snap to his director and spotted your boyfriend hunched over the  steering wheel, tensely with his hands once again tucked tightly under his arms. You watch him for a few seconds, unsure of what to even do. Soon Stefan's body relaxes and his hands fall back onto the steering wheel in front of him. "Stefan, what the hell is going on?" Stefan slightly turns his head in your general direction but like normal he keeps his eyes down, besides the few split seconds he glances up at you. "Nothing, I'm fine." He's quick to reply, not wanting to worry you. However, it was a little too late for that. "No you're not, Stefan! You're completely stressing out over this Bandersnatch game, you're not even letting yourself calm your anxiety." Stefan's eyes finally raise to meet yours in a state of confusion. "What are you even talking about?" "You're nail biting and you pulling your earlobes, you always use to do it subconsciously when your anxiety was going off but now it seems like your fighting yourself to not let you calm yourself down." Your voice was filled with concern, and he hear it, however he was having an internal battle over something. He wasn't subconsciously doing those things, they weren't his choice, he wasn't controlling it. Dropping his arms from the steering wheel and into his lap, Stefan turned his whole body towards you. "I am fighting it, Y/N. I'm not the one in fucking control anymore!" His voice raised, however you didn't react. Him raising his voice has been a normal occurrence recently. "What do you mean?" Stefan stayed silent. "You feel like someone is controlling you?" "I don't feel like it, someone is Y/N!" Stefan's hands quickly slam down, gripping ahold of the center console, his quick movement make you flinch slightly. "What are you being told to do now?" With a dry mouth, your voice cracks as you ask. "To hurt you, but I don't want to, I won't." Stefan grits threw his teeth, his body finally relaxing. "How is it controlling you, Stefan?" The phrasing of your sentence reminds him of Dr. Haynes and his father, but it's your tone of voice that keeps him from thinking you're the same. "Everything, from the type of cereal I eat in the morning to the music I listen to, to the way I react. They control everything." You quickly lean forward and turn off the radio, stopping the Thompson Twins from playing. "Well-" You pause for a few seconds before continuing. "What do you need me to do when it happens?" Stefan looks at you once again, in shock. He was expecting you to call him crazy and run as far away from him as possible, he should know better but he couldn't help but let the thought run threw him mind. "I- I don't know." His head now hung in disappointment. Stefan knew you just wanted to help him, hell he wished he could tell you how but he didn't know. His body quickly relaxed more when you leaned your body over the center console of the car wrapped your arms tightly around your boyfriend's shoulders. "Listen, whenever you feel like you're being controlled to do something bad, just call out for me, okay? I'll figure something out." Stefan nodded into your shoulder, agreeing to your terms.

    Clicking of the keyboard, pages turning back and forth in the book, Stefan's pencil on the paper. The same thing, just a different date. You're so lost in your own head and the book in front of you that you don't realize that all noises stopped, and you don't hear the sound of Stefan's fingers banging down on the wooden desk. It's not until your name rushes from his mouth that you finally look up from the book. The sight was terrifying to you. Stefan body was again tense and shaking, his fingers were the same way in an attempt to dig themselves into the wooden desk. "Y/N, it's fucking happening." You're besides him in seconds, one arm wrapped around his shoulders also as a way of letting him know you were with him. "What are they making you do, Stefan?" You pull him closer to your body as you're eyes stayed locked on his hands. Stefan doesn't verbally answer, however you can put two and two together when his hand begins moving towards his mouth, only for his other hand to take a hold of that one and slam it back down onto the desk. You lean forward, placing your hand ontop of both of his. "Stefan, listen to my voice, okay? I'm here, you are in control. I'm not gonna let anything bad happen to you." You can feel him fighting again your hands. In one swift motion you are in front of him sat up ontop of his desk, worried how he would react if you sat in his lap instead. Both of your hands moved to lace with Stefan's as you hold them tightly in your lap. You continue to talk to him, you stray away from using anything besides your normal voice in an attempt to not make Stefan feel like he's in therapy.  After a few more minutes, you finally feel Stefan's body still and relax, you drop his hands only for him to lean forward and wrap his arms around your torso, laying his head in your lap. He stayed like that, saying nothing as you move your hand into his head of curls as a means of calming him. No more than 5 minutes later Stefan is dead asleep in your lap.

    "Hello, Y/N" Stefan's father jumped as he turned from locking the door of the one room you nor Stefan have never been in, only to find you standing there. "Hi." You mumble back, before pressing on towards your boyfriend's bedroom. "Oh, Y/N?" his father called out from behind you, making you turn and face him. "Make sure Stefan gets a meal today, alright?" If he wasn't looking directly at you, you would have rolled your eyes at him. "Always do, Mr. Butler." You turn, roll your eyes and push your way into Stefan's bedroom. You stop as soon as you pass through his doorway. You watched as he fought to put the cup of tea back down onto his desk. You quickly drop your bag at the door way and run up behind Stefan wrapping your arms tightly around him from behind, forcing his arm down. "I'm not going to destroy my computer." Stefan stated, through his gritted teeth. You had told him to verbally say he wasn't going to do something, as a means of training his brain into controlling it himself. "You're not going to destroy the computer." Stefan's head came back to rest on your shoulder, or so you thought to rest before he began yelling out. "Who's doing this to me?" You let out a sign, you hated seeing Stefan this way, you hated that you just couldn't make it all stop. "Who's doing this to me?!" You wrap your arms tighter around your boyfriend, as of the moment, letting him know you were there was the only thing you could do. Both of your heads quickly snapped back to the computer screen when the screen suddenly went black and began making noises. White letters then began to show up one by one of the screen. "I am controlling you through Netflix." You and Stefan turn to one another in confusion before looking back at his screen and saying in unison, "What the fuck is Netflix?"

#bandersnatch #stefan butler #stefan butler fluff #stefan bulter imagines #stefan bulter imagine #stefan bulter drabbles #stefan butler blurb #bandersnatch imagines #fionn whitehead

[ezekielbhandarivalleros]

Addicted to Weed - Chapter 1

Characters: Jake Tweneboah (MC), Sienna Trinh, Jackie Varma (Mentioned)  Ethan Ramsey (Mentioned)

Summary: Sienna finds out about Jake’s weed problem

Rated - M

Taglist: @princess-geek @gamechoices-player @secretaryunpaid @arnikki-2406 @choicesficwriterscreations @riana-drarry @treasure-seeking-elf @lisha1valecha @yourresidentplayer @schnitzelbutterfingers

Also thanks for @secretaryunpaid for helping me make the necessary changes and editsl

Jake let out a sigh of relief as he stepped through into his apartment. Quickly he locked and dead bolted the door, and slid the security chain into place. After nearly three years at the hospital he never entered his apartment without immediately doing those three things. He turned on several lights and moved to the kitchen to start a pot of coffee brewing before dropping himself onto the couch.

Jake retrieved a cup of coffee and settled himself into the couch. He kicked off his shoes to display his mismatched socks as he loosened his tie. He was very glad to be home, but at the same time it increased his anxiety. While he was an introvert and did enjoy spending time alone with Jackie, the last few months had been hard. Lately when he was alone he turned to Weed, but for the past two weeks he had been trying to avoid using it. He hadn't been very successful. He had tried to wean himself off slowly, but once he had taken a small dose he usually got to the point that he didn't care and ended up taking more. Already, though he had only just gotten home, he felt his eyes drifting to the bathroom where he kept the drug hidden. He gripped his coffee cup tightly, trying to fight off the urge to use.

He thought briefly about calling one of the team to see if they wanted to go out for something to eat, but quickly decided against it, deciding he needed the rest of the evening to relax. Jake sighed and put his cup on the coffee table. He rubbed his face and again his eyes drifted to the bathroom. He was so tired, but he knew that he probably wouldn't be able to sleep without some help. He groaned and leaned back on the couch, and tried to distract himself by watching random videos on Youtube.

Abruptly he stood and crossed to the bathroom. He tore open the medicine cabinet and pulled the last of the weed out of its hiding spot in a box meant to hold cough syrup. Not that he really ever had anyone over to his place besides his old roommates, but he still wasn't careless enough to leave it out in the open. He tossed the box aside and unscrewed the top of the bottle. He held it wavering in his hand. He wanted desperately to just tip the bottle to empty the contents into the sink and be done with it. He had had this battle with himself many times before. Two times he had even succeeded, but then found himself calling his dealer only hours later to gain more.

Jake ran into his and Jackie’s bedroom and pulled out pieces of rolling paper and made blunts. Jackie was the only person who knew that he still smoked as he told the others that he quit a few weeks ago. He remained on the floor for quite some time, feeling no desire to move back to the living room with the tv still on.. He was perfectly content where he sat, enjoying the feeling of nothingness and after a while he dozed a bit. He didn't know how much time had passed before he heard a knock at the door. It had probably hadn't been more than an hour or two. He tried to ignore it, but whoever it was knocking was persistent.

Groaning, he rolled to his knees then used the edge of the bed to pull himself to his feet. He legs felt rubbery, so he stood there for a moment to steady himself. He looked at his reflection and stifled a giggle. At the moment he found looking in the mirror incredibly funny, but he wasn't entirely sure why. It felt somewhat surreal, looking at himself. The knocking at the door became more persistent. He sighed. It was probably was one of his friends. No one else ever came to his home this late.

He cringed as his door was pounded on, and this time was accompanied by a voice. "Come on, I know you're home. Please open the door." Jake sighed heavily. Sienna. Of course it was her. Anyone else would probably have given up, but she would be there until two in the morning, still knocking if he thought that  was home. Jake shook his head and made his way down the hallway slowly. He hadn't even made it halfway when Sienna knocked again, louder.

"I'm coming, I'm coming," Jake called out. He made it to the door and fumbled with the locks, struggling with the security chain. It took several tries for him to be able to slide it free. He swung the door open. "What are you doing here, Sienna?" he asked, not bothering to try to hide his irritation. "Hey, grumpy much?" Sienna smirked and raised her hands. Jake didn't respond except to glare and gave a roll of his eyes. "Aren't you going to invite me in?" "You've never been out this late before. Why did you decide to just show up in the middle of the night?"

"Somebody's cranky when his beauty sleep gets interrupted." Sienna pushed past Jake into the apartment without his invitation. He held up a brown paper bag. "I left the office about an hour after you did and I thought I'd stop and grab some Chinese at that really good restaurant and then realized how close I was to your place so I figured I pick some up for you and Jackie and bring it over here, but as she’s asleep you can have hers”

"That restaurant is almost seven miles from here, Sienna," Jake said.

Sienna didn't seem fazed as he walked into the kitchen and rummaged through the cupboards for paper plates not caring if she woke Jackie up. "I got those egg rolls that you like." "Okay, I see we're just going to pretend that you showing up here is normal," Jake grumbled. He followed Sienna as he brought the plates to the dining room.

Sienna looked around the luxury apartment, taking in the well-used but comfortable looking furniture and the many shelves housing hundreds of books and the one shelf that contained dozens of science fiction DVDs. " I can definitely tell that you live here and It shows that mostly everything belongs to you."

"It's my apartment, Sienna. Was it supposed to look like someone different lived here?"

She raised an eyebrow. "You usually reserve this level of hostility for occasions."

Jake blushed and looked away. "Sorry. I'm just tired."

Sienna shrugged. "Sit down and eat."

"I'm not really hun—"

"Sit," Sienna interrupted. "Eat." She ordered.

Jake dropped into the chair, looking a bit like a child who had been reprimanded for something. He grabbed one of the egg rolls and took a small bite.

"I'm fine," Jake said quickly.

"How often have you been using the drugs?" Sienna asked conversationally.

Jake looked up, the expression on his face giving the impression of him being a deer caught in the headlights. "What are you talking about?" he asked, voice a little higher than usual.

Sienna pushed his plate of food away and leaned forward, elbows on the table, and his face suddenly deadly serious. "You're high right now, aren't you?”

“Hey, I was still eating that” Jake screamed.

Jake laughed, the sound slightly hysterical. "Sienna, you- you're confused. I-I'm not-… I don't-…" he sputtered, trying to keep the smile on his face. "That's crazy," he finally managed to finish.

Sienna's face was still locked in that serious look. "I'm sorry, kid. I knew something was going on with you, we all did. I thought maybe it was PTSD. But we all left you to deal with it on your own. We should have been there for you. I should have been there. I should have seen. I'm sorry."

The faux smile fell of Jake’s face as she spoke. He dropped his eyes to the table, seeming to struggle with himself to find the words. It looked as though he was trying to decide if he wanted to admit to the drug use or to continue to try to deny it. The internal battle waged for nearly a minute before he looked back up. "Pretty stupid thing to do for someone who's supposed to be a genius isn't it?" he smiled, but it was bitter and self-deprecating.

"Not stupid. Not really smart either," Sienna sighed, looking at Jake his dark eyes troubled. "It's Weed, isn't it?" “Jackie has been telling me.”

Jake nodded, almost imperceptibly, avoiding eye contact. Morgan wasn't reacting to this in a way he had expected. There was no yelling, or threatening. No accusations or anger, only a weary acceptance. "I stole it from one of they younger interns after their first week and got hooked, not even my brother whose a year above me knows. After I ran out I bought my own. I t-… I tried to stop. I really did. I threw it out twice. But I always-… I always got more afterwards." He ran a trembling hand through his hair.

"How often do you take it?"

"Usually only once a day, but I don't take it at all if we're working a case," he elaborated, shooting a quick glance at Sienna.

"Why do you only take it when you're home?" She asked him. She was still acting much to calm for Jake to understand, and things that Jake didn't understand made him nervous.

Jake shook his head. "If the other know, for sure Ethan might have to report it, and you'll be fired. I won't tell him as long as you stop."

Jake looked desperate. "I've tried before, Sienna. I don't think I can do it." He looked so hopeless that it almost made Sienna want to cry.

But she didn't. Instead she leaned forward and put his hand on the older man's shoulder. "Yes, you can, and you will. You've only tried by yourself before. Now you've got help. You don't have to be alone anymore."

#playchoices #choices #oc #sienna trinh #open heart #jake tweneboah

[crimsonfluidessence]

Prompt 8: Adroit

Content Warning: Mentions of Torture School sucked. That was the conclusion Esredes came to for most of his childhood. He was never the biggest fan of many aspects of it, of sitting indoors and listening to lectures when he could be out in the world. Writing in particular was never fun. So many rules had to be drilled into him, on how sentences and grammar worked and what the proper words to use were. So many hours collectively he must have spent, pouring over dictionaries and definitions, scolded and given a bad grade if his writing did not match the expected standards. He never did quite get the hang of it. Even as an adult, he found himself back in the same loop of dictionaries always being out on his desk when he had the brilliant idea to accept a House of Lords members’ offer of being an assistant and look over and write letters and speeches and proposals for the man. Some nobles he knew could write flourishing and beautiful things with ease, but he always had to stop and get fixated on words, if this or that was spelled right or flowed correctly, only for the end result to be something he always felt resembled a noble’s writing, but if one were to observe it more carefully and pick it apart, it would come undone at the seams. At least all those failed drafts were simply put in the trash. His war journal stayed locked away in his home nowadays, not only for the particular out of the ordinary pages like the time he wrote a full page of I’m sorry, but the few times in his life he tried to write poetry lines in it on a whim. It was awful, and he regretted it the moment after he finished trying. The page was almost intelligible with crossed out words, but it read like a madman’s disjointed ramblings trying to sound pretty. How the hell did poetry work? He had no idea, and it was an embarrassment to take to his grave, or else truly no worse fate would await him. He was mediocre at mathematics. No excuse of simply being a child of less artistic disciplines- he found nothing significant for himself in pretty much any part of schooling except history. He liked reading about the past, and it took to his memory much better than equations or the different forms of the same word. Seraphiaux always did better, even when he neglected studies. There he was, the little child prodigy learning alchemy and healing at age seven with all his books, and Esredes was trying to understand semicolons at fifteen. He was going to be a healer, Esredes would be a Temple Knight- and only one of them had any progress towards it at all. His parents did not allow him to play or practice with swords or weapons of any kind. “Not until you enter training,” they said. “It’s too dangerous.”Most noble children would probably be far better off coming from two parents who did not fight in the war, who did not try to push and train them to be soldiers from an early age. Esredes was an exception to that, as he thought. Instead, he was stuck in the increasing realization that he had little talent for anything. It only made sense to him later why- a soldier could not have other talents, or else they would be distracted from their purpose and not want to fight. But he did not know yet he was one, for sure, and all he could do to escape was funnel into his little wish. It wasn’t the easiest journey to finish schooling, but he managed it. Right into training he went… and there came a breakdown soon enough. The shield. That stupid goddamn shield. He hated carrying it and no matter what he did, he could not get the hang of using it. I’m going to fail, he thought for sure. He would have to go back to his parents and accept he had no passion to pursue, and then work extremely hard every day to be good enough to be head of house, when he knew in his heart he was not enough for it. Yet it all passed as he funneled himself solely into the sword at the instruction of a superior, and once more he had something. Combat. He was right all along. Combat was his answer to everything, his shining star of purpose and ability. Day after day after day, he threw his entire body and soul into training. Nothing could match that ecstasy of true purpose and being. The day he was knighted was the best of his life. Superiors took notice of him, sometimes for the bad but more often for the good, especially as time went on. The ecstasy eventually faded as the harsher realities of battle came to be, but still in those moments of promotion and praise from the higher ups, when people spoke of his accomplishments and even, increasingly as time went on, his bouts of strategy in battle, it surged back up in a lesser form. When he was twenty two, an opportunity came to him like no other. A captured heretic who had the blood of dragons in him which his squadron had apprehended. “Let me interrogate him alone before the Inquisitors come,” Esredes asked his superior. He had done just enough questioning people in the past that he was confident an answer for his curse could be found. Alas, as he carved into the captive repeatedly and shouted at him about his affliction, he ended up empty handed. His one shot at answers had been blown in a bout of overconfidence, and questions raged on in his head. It got easier when he returned to the art of interrogation after the law no longer held him down. As he realized how important it was to get into their heads, slithering up through their ear canals with a tongue increasingly coated in silver, and pull it apart from inside. Then came civilization again, and Esredes was left constantly wondering why people kept spilling their lives’ stories and turmoils to him when they barely knew each other. Why did people constantly look at him like he had just trudged up and told them something they never realized about themselves, when he had just stated the obvious anyone could figure out from dealing with people for thirty three years? Why did he seem to calm some people down so easily just by opening his mouth- that half when he wasn’t inciting them to anger as he always did? Well, being the Keeper of Secrets was not easy, but as he left for Dravania to maintain a fragile peace as a diplomat some days, and looked over his list of clients and his near perfect record others, he smiled about it to himself in the comfort of the blue walls. Yet it was never enough. He had climbed to a Temple Commander before he fell, climbed in much less time to the top of the Disciples and then their leader, managed to pull himself out of being a wanted criminal to multiple people offering him jobs in areas he never expected to take, and yet the same internal monologue repeated. I can’t do this, he said as he tried each new job far outside of his perceived, singular combat ability. So many others could do this better than me. There would be a shining and perfectly talented Ishgardian, one who hadn’t fought in the heretic’s side of the war, who was merely open minded and far more likable, and he would finally be fired from his diplomacy job and replaced by them. Ferrant would never replace him, but it didn’t mean he wasn’t still constantly stressing that he was not meant for the work and couldn’t be enough help. And while he was no longer at a risk of firing since going independent on his side job, and he did not expect all his clients to stop showing up, it never eased that anxiety every time that he could mess it up and do everything wrong in a heartbeat, and ruin everything. But if another counselor like him ever showed up in the same circles, and just proved to be so much better than him At least he still had combat, he told himself. As stupid incompetent children fought primals, ended the war, and got all the peoples’ admiration and praise, he still had combat. As he continued to make critical errors here and there in his ventures, and get in trouble with the Inquisition for vigilantism, forced only to stick to the law enforcement of the wilderness and the expeditions his friends would not take to the system, he still had combat. Not every day anymore as he stuck to his civilian tasks, but he had it. What would a talentless soldier be without the purpose of combat? Of dying, of sacrifice, or usefulness? The disgraced Temple Knight who would never officially and legally fight for anything ever again, only forced to emulate ability in areas he was never built for? The answer found itself in bars. Former Dragoons, it was almost always Dragoons. The ones who started fights just to feel anything, screamed at and insulted people because they truly felt they had no purpose in life anymore, and refused to move on to do anything productive. Esredes sighed to himself every time when he saw them. Perhaps he was not a man of talents, but he would continue to blend in and pretend. If not only for being above making an even bigger disgrace of himself. He always hated too much attention. ----- @heartofthefury​ Seraphiaux/Ferrant

#writing #in action #ffxivwrite2021 #younger esredes #ferrant #Seraphiaux #esrey's office

[ransomedrogue]

Tales of Woe - Scenes from S1

oops, meant to get this out before Monday but minor delay due to editing! 

this week - a scene to start the episode and one to end it...

1.3

Weller's emotional rollercoaster of a day started before the previous one had even ended - with a phone call just before midnight.

He hadn't been home all that long after wrapping up the Gibson case when his cell began to ring and he saw that it was an agent from Jane's detail. That alone flicked at his anxiety, making him flash back to the fear he'd experienced seeing her crashed car. Then, when the agent started describing what had happened at the safe house, Weller's blood pressure instantly shot through the roof and he almost walked out the door in just his PJs before he realized he needed to bring his badge and gun.

Rushing to the scene, Weller only managed to resist breaking numerous driving laws by constantly reminding himself that Jane hadn't sustained any serious injuries and was currently chaperoned by multiple FBI agents and cops. Yet he was still much too aware that those same agents had just let a guy sneak into her safe house and it was entirely possible that she would already be dead if that had been the man's goal.

Ice cold dread ran through Kurt at that thought. He could have lost her again, so soon after finding her. Even if they hadn't tested her DNA yet, he was sure that she was Taylor, somehow brought back to him after twenty-five years away.

Pulling up to the scene at an unreasonable pace, Weller saw that it was already getting busy with more agents arriving and the coroner showing up to deal with the body. He flashed his badge to get past the yellow tape and immediately started scanning until he saw Jane sitting on the couch, scowling at the paramedic trying to look into her eyes with a penlight.

"Ma'am, you've been hit hard enough to lose a tooth and your pupils are still dilated. I really recommend that you come to the hospital and get examined by a doctor."

Instead of arguing with the EMT, Jane saw that Weller was approaching and gave him an exasperated look. And suddenly he was transported back to a moment forgotten for so long that he hadn't known that it was still there.

In his memory Kurt was nine and crouching in front of an annoyed four-year-old, doing his best to put antiseptic on her scraped knees as she rolled her eyes at him and complained.

"It's not even bleeding, Kurt," she'd groaned, desperate to get back to the game they'd been playing. "You're such a worrywart."

Weller remembered the internal pressure he'd felt, babysitting his wild little neighbour. It had been a responsibility he took pride in and he'd hated having to tell Emma that Taylor had hurt herself again, attempting some stunt. Or, even worse, explaining that he'd stepped on Taylor's hand, causing her to fall from the tree. Not that Emma had ever blamed him for any of the bruises and cuts; instead, she'd always reassured him that it was all part of an active childhood. Still, he'd been the older one, the one in charge. So he'd always felt like it was his fault if Taylor hurt herself, no matter what anyone else said.

Looking at Jane now, he felt exactly the same way. He obviously couldn't protect her, not even with the power of the FBI behind him. And failing in his duty made him angry and anxious; overprotective to the extreme.

Kurt flashed his badge and told the paramedic that he could go, explaining that he would deal with Jane and make her see a doctor. The EMT exhaled in relief as he walked away from his stubborn patient and Weller took the man's place, standing in front of Jane, who was still seated on the couch.

She looked tired yet agitated, sitting there holding her swollen cheek. He could see that it was already bruising and Weller internally flinched as he imagined her getting hit hard enough to knock out a tooth.

"I knew him," she said immediately. "He's the man from my target training memory. The one that was outside the building before we almost got blown up. He knows me and he was following me. We have to find out who he is."

"Whoa, Jane," Weller replied, crouching down to look at her more closely. "Slow down. We will do everything we can to find out who that guy was and how he's connected to you. And I do want to know exactly what happened here. But first, tell me are you okay?"

Jane looked a little startled by his question, as if she'd completely forgotten about everything else while fixating on the dead man in her safe house. Then she glanced down at her hand on her cheek and wrinkled her nose.

"My face hurts. But otherwise I'm fine," she muttered.

"You still have to get checked out by a doctor," Weller said. "He must have hit you really hard."

Jane brought her hand down from off her jaw and gave him an irritated look.

"It's been a long day, Weller," she groaned. "I really don't want to go to the hospital."

Weller flashed back to earlier that day, having the same argument with her after she'd crashed the SUV. He'd pretty much guilted her into it then. But right now Jane sounded so tired and on edge that he didn't want to battle with her.

Yet it was clear she needed to see a doctor and at least get some x-rays of her jaw. So Kurt thought the issue through until he arrived at a solution that could placate both of them, even taking the time to figure out how best to present it to his recalcitrant patient.

"Well, you can't stay here," Weller finally said. "It's a crime scene now. We'll find you a safer place."

"And you need to be cleared by a doctor before you can come back out in the field with us," he added. "That's standard protocol."

Jane's frown deepened and she exhaled wearily. Weller could hear that he'd chosen the right selling point - she was desperate to stay involved with the case and be out on missions with the team.

"So either I take you to the hospital right now or you pack up some stuff and we go to the NYO. You can sleep in the medical bay until the doctor gets there in the morning to check you out."

Jane gave him a long look that indicated she knew exactly what he was doing. Yet, for once, she didn't argue, just giving him a tired shake of her head instead.

"Okay, I'll see the doctor at the NYO," she sighed.

Weller held back a grin at her begrudging response and offered her his hand. Jane gave it a long suspicious look before grasping it and letting him pull her up to her feet.

The drive to the NYO was silent, even though Kurt was full of questions. He desperately wanted to know everything that had happened that night but knew that it wasn't the right time to ask. Jane was quiet and obviously still shaken from what had happened; so Weller decided to leave his questions for the morning, after she'd been seen by a doctor.

As they neared the office, Kurt glanced over at Jane once more. He had thought her silence was due to her own head being full of questions too, or continued stubbornness about getting medically checked out. But it turned out that she'd just fallen asleep now that all the adrenaline had fled her system, her head lolled back against the headrest so the bird tattoo was perfectly exposed.

He had never before met such a vibrant, tenacious woman. And even though he had no proof yet, Weller knew in his bones that she was Taylor. He'd gotten her back; been given a second chance. And this time, he wasn't going to let anyone hurt her.

Again he glanced over at his sleeping charge, feeling a warm tickle spread through him as he realized how relaxed she now looked. All the tenseness she'd been wearing at the crime scene was gone as she murmured inaudibly and leaned in his direction.

Weller resisted the urge to reach over and brush a wayward strand of hair out of her face, forcing himself to focus on the road. Yet he still found himself looking to his right far too often, as if his eyes were magnetically drawn to her.

It was impossible but he believed it with every cell in his body.

She was Jane and she was Taylor.

And most of all, she was his to protect.

###

Jane's emotional rollercoaster of a day ended with two solid answers; yet her head was still full of questions as she stood there, clinging onto Weller's arm.

After all that arguing with Weller and Agent Reade's open questioning of her role in the investigation, it had been a major relief to be told by Mayfair that they had all supported her being armed and part of the team. Jane was sure that Weller had pulled rank with his agents to get that kind of unanimity but she hadn't even had time to really thank him for backing her before Patterson showed up and gave them the other, unbelievable, news.

She was Taylor Shaw. Weller's neighbour, who had disappeared without a trace twenty-five years ago.

Jane stared at him and he stared right back. She watched a wave of joy pass through Weller's expressive blue eyes and felt his elation ripple down her spine as well. Not only had they finally found out something concrete about her, it tied her intricately with Kurt and explained his name being tattooed on her back.

For a moment Jane wondered if it was normal, how much Weller could make her feel. She'd spent most of the day being furious with him for keeping secrets and refusing to let her participate fully out in the field. But then he'd insisted on going with her to the hospital, despite Agent Reade's vocal objections. Which had paradoxically made her feel both protected and nervous, because it was clear that Reade had touched on the truth.

Then, as soon as they were in danger, he had given her a gun without hesitation, fully trusting her to watch his back. Which had been a good thing, considering how close he'd gotten to having a full round of ammunition pumped into him, point blank. Even as it was, Jane had almost been too late - she'd seen the gunman's trigger finger moving just as she shot him dead.

The relief she'd felt seeing Weller alive was as fierce as any emotion she'd experienced yet. And then there had been a whole new set of feelings after he told her he thought she was his childhood friend, the little girl who went missing when he was ten. That revelation had finally put the entire day into perspective, completely flipping her understanding of his behaviour.

The argument with Mayfair. His sudden overprotectiveness. His blow up when she disobeyed his order and put herself in danger.

Weller had been under such immense personal pressure. She wondered how long he'd been thinking of her as Taylor. Clearly it had been influencing his actions all day.

Jane flushed a bit remembering how furious she'd been with him during his tirade about protecting her. At least she wasn't angry with him anymore. That hadn't felt good at all.

So much was running through her mind that Jane suddenly realized they'd been standing there for ages, just holding on to each other and staring silently. Patterson had left somewhere along the way and it now was just the two of them, with the mind-blowing piece of information hanging between them.

Weller's eyes were still teeming with an emotion she couldn't quite identify. She could see that he was fighting to contain himself now that his suspicion had been confirmed.

Jane flashed back to him telling her that she could trust him, that he'd been looking for her all his life. It made her feel warm and a bit tingly, to be to closely tied to Weller. But there was also pressure to being the girl he'd sought for so long - to mean so much to a man she barely knew, a man who already made her feel everything so strongly.

"Are you okay?" he asked, finally finding his voice.

"Yeah," she replied slowly. "It's just… how is this even possible?"

Weller shook his head, a look of wonder still in his eyes.

"I don't know," he said.

"But we will figure it out. We're going to find out what happened to you."

He sounded so sure but Jane was realizing that getting answers had only opened up an onslaught of new questions. If anything, being Weller's childhood neighbour made the whole situation even more confusing and implausible. Also, what had Casey meant by Orion? Was that a clue to where she'd been taken after being kidnapped at age five?

The wave of questions was about to engulf her when Jane felt a squeeze on her elbow and remembered that Weller's hand was still on her arm. Looking up at him, she suddenly felt drained from everything that had occurred in the past day. She'd barely gotten any sleep after the attack at her safe house and then had an extremely emotionally and physically taxing day.

"Hey," he said, studying her closely. "Do you want to talk about it?"

Jane shook her head. She needed some time to think before she asked him any more questions.

"Okay then, how about some food?"

She furrowed her brow at him, confused by the abrupt change in topic. But Weller was just giving her his usual warm concerned look, like he hadn't said anything out of the ordinary.

"I bet you haven't eaten all day," he added. "It's been over twelve hours."

Food was the last thought on her mind, especially after such an intense day. But, thinking about it, she realized that he was right on both counts. And then, precisely at that moment, as if her body was in collusion with Weller, Jane's stomach growled.

Weller grinned at her and Jane swore she even saw a twinkle in his eye as he slipped his hand down her arm until his fingers were entwined with hers.

"Well, that settles that," he said. "Let's go get something to eat."

"Weller," Jane muttered, unsure about his proposition. Going to a restaurant with Weller sounded both enticing and nerve-wracking. Especially with everything that had happened between them that day.

"It's fine, I'll order in later."

"No," he replied sternly. "We're going together and I'll take you to your new safe house after. We won't talk about any of this until tomorrow. But I want to make sure you eat some real food."

Jane's instinct was to argue and push off his concern. But then she remembered the sadness in his eyes as he'd told her about his little neighbour, how he'd been there the night she was taken.

Weller wanted to protect her. And as much as it was sometimes irritating, it also made her feel safer knowing that he was looking out for her so fervently. So maybe it was okay to let him care a bit too much, especially when it felt so good to have his fingers laced between hers.

"Okay," she sighed, giving his hand a squeeze.

She didn't yet know what to say, or how she felt about being his missing girl. But Jane did want him to understand how she was grateful for everything he'd done for her already and for how much he cared.

"Thank you," she finally said, offering him a timid smile. "For everything."

"I'm so glad you found me."

#blindspot #blindspot fanfic #blindspot rewatch #s1fic #i wrote this

[mrs-hyperfixed-writes]

Ending 32

Could you do a one shot who is happening during a heist with Markiplier with y/n and Actor Mark? You could choose the end you want. For Nekotsuki314159.

This was a stupid idea. This was a terrible idea. This was a stupid, terrible, idiotic idea. A heist? Mark’s idea, of course. Breaking into a museum to steal a heavily guarded box and he wouldn’t even tell you what was in it. He said it was a surprise. Something that was going to knock your socks off. Well it was going to be a hell of surprise for him when you throttled him if this turned out to be a waste of time. He would probably moan, the bottom that he was. 

You had met up with him for the past month at base going over ideas. And by that you meant your living room. Mark had said that he wanted the full experience, so now the manors living room was the base. Drama queen. 

You had both spied on the guards movements, stolen blueprints that revealed all of the vents in the building, various other spy shit that you refused to admit to Mark was actually pretty fun, and then had formed a plan that should technically be foolproof. But when have things ever gone right for us? Never. 

So as you prepared to break into that museum in the dead of night to meet up with your lover you couldn’t help that gnawing feeling in your stomach that something was going to go wrong. Sure, the plan that you had both formulated had practically written itself, but past experiences had told you to be on your guard. 

You scaled the outside wall of the museum, and the Heist began.

***

Alarms blared. You knew it. You knew that things had to go wrong eventually. Things had been going far too smoothly. This experience was like riding a waterslide into a pool full of piranhas. Sure, it had been fun at first, but now you were going to suffer the consequences of getting on this slide in the first place. You blinked. That was the strangest metaphor you had come up with so far. 

Panic was written across Mark’s handsome face. But always the hero, he quickly came up with a solution or two. And ever the gentleman, he let you choose. And so the escape began.

***

You’d robbed a museum, run from crazy guards shooting you (why do museum guards need guns anyway?), stolen a jeep that had conveniently just so happened to be in a field in the middle of nowhere next to a helicopter (also, who just leaves their helicopter abandoned in a field?), and now the jeep was broken down and you were stuck in the middle of the woods, desperately trying to get back to the manor. And after all of this, Mark still refused to give you any sort of idea about what the hell had been worth the trouble. What could possibly be so important? To say your mood had turned sour was the understatement of the century. You were one pebble in the shoe away from having a nuclear meltdown. So you stopped and crossed your arms, waiting for Mark to notice you weren’t following him. 

He turned around, wondering why your footsteps had stopped. He faced you, beckoning for you to come closer so you could walk beside him. Stubbornly you stared him down, refusing to budge. He raised an eyebrow and walked closer.

“What’s wrong?” Concern laced his voice. 

Almost immediately you felt a little guilty, standing here about to demand an explanation from him when that concern for you was so genuine. You both only had each other, and he may be an egotistical jerk sometimes, but there was no doubt in your mind that he loved you with everything he had. He might just love you more than he loved himself. Sometimes you wondered if he knew that you would give up your soul for him. But you forced those thoughts down. Love wasn’t going to get in the way of you rightfully demanding an explanation for why you’d been dragged through the metaphorical thornbush from hell.

“What’s in the box Mark?”

Mark blanched, clearly not expecting you to have brought this up. He knew you’d been antsy about this whole thing, but apparently he’d been hoping you wouldn’t force his hand into revealing his “surprise”.

“Mark,” you took a deep breath, “It’s been a long night. I’m tired and cold. I want to know if it was all worth it.”

Mark took a few steps closer to you, clutching the box protectively to his chest. Was he really not going to tell you?

“We’ll be back at base-”

“I don’t care. Tell me now.” There was no room for argument in your demand. 

Mark’s brows slowly furrowed together and he glanced down. He seemed to be waging an internal battle with himself. You could almost hear the cogs turning in his head. He seemed exhausted too. If he wasn’t so tired then maybe he would put up a bit more of a fight. The arguments you two sometimes got into could last for hours. 

He sighed. “You’re just not going to let this go are you?”

“No.”

He bit his bottom lip anxiously, as if you had put him on the spot. Well, you had. But finally he sighed and walked over to you. When you reached out your hands for the box he stepped back again. You raised an eyebrow, clearly unamused.

“Turn around.”

Now it was your turn to look surprised. “What?”

“Turn around. Please?”

The Actor very rarely said please for anything, and especially not in that pleading tone. You sighed but relented. If this was what it took to get him to tell or show you what was inside then you would do it. You heard him rummaging around behind you, heard the sound of twigs snapping as his weight shifted. What was he doing?

“Okay. Turn back around.” You didn’t miss the note of hesitance in his voice.

“Mark what’s-” 

Your breath caught in your throat as soon as you took in the sight before you. It was Mark, down on one knee and holding a ring. An engagement ring. The thick silver band sported a large gem as the centerpiece. Your birthstone. And encrusted along the sides to compliment the stone were little rubies. The symbolism of it wasn’t lost on you. And here Mark was, anxiety written all over his face that he was very poorly hiding behind a dazzling white smile as he held out the piece of jewelry. His eyes were filled with hope. His expression was so. . . naked. He was an actor by trade, and had shown in the past how he was very good at keeping up ruses and hiding how he truly felt. Was this situation really so terrifying for him that he couldn’t keep on his mask? 

You and Mark had been together for a long time now, but the Actor had never even hinted at getting married. You had always just assumed he would never truly be over the failure of his first marriage. That he would never be over her. But now here he was with his heart on his sleeve and a ring that surely put the ring he had proposed to Celine with to shame.  

You were speechless, all these thoughts filling your head and making it impossible to form a coherent sentence. But the longer you stood there staring, the more anxious he seemed to get. And then he did something truly out of character. 

He began to ramble. Very quickly. “I mean- It’s just- Um. . . I knew the museum had this ring and it was perfect. So I uh. . . did some research! And it was like it was destiny ya know? Haha. . . And I love going on adventures with you! Obviously I had kinda hoped that things would go differently in terms of escaping! But um. . . I. . . Ugh. What I’m trying to say is- (Y/n)willyoumarryme?!” He didn’t take a breath that entire time.

You snapped back to reality, looking into his eyes. He looked like he was preparing for a blow. 

You grinned. A true, genuine grin that reached all the way up to your eyes. “You moron Mark.” You let out a chuckle. “Of course I’ll marry you!” 

Tears of joy began to prick the back of your eyes, all of your negative feelings you had now vanished in a puff of smoke. Mark’s own expression slid into something of such relief that you were worried he was going to pass out. 

He held up the ring, asking a silent question. In answer you presented your left hand to him. He slid the ring onto your finger. A perfect fit. He wasn’t wrong, this almost seemed like destiny. It was like you were supposed to have this ring. 

He grinned back up at you. A beautiful thing that had your heart beating at a million miles a minute. He made to get back up, but before he could, you launched yourself at him, tackling him to the ground. You lay on top of his chest, arms around his neck and capturing his lips in a breathless kiss. He smiled into your lips. 

He pulled back to ask you one thing though. “So, was it worth it?”

You just laughed and kissed him again. 

#markiplier #markiplier egos #actor Mark #actor mark x reader #actor mark x y/n #Fluff #Not my best work #But I liked the idea

[that-good-trash]

I’m Not Okay- Chapter 5. The final chapter Midoriya x reader/ Bakugou x reader

Izuku Midoriya x reader/ Katsuki Bakugou x reader

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4

Summary: You have struggled with mental health your whole life so why can’t you seem to get it under control. Will you be able to keep the same mask even though two of your classmates have seen under it?

Warnings: Depression, Mentions of suicide/ Attempt at suicide, Self-harm, Angst, Anxiety,

Word count: 8,582

Comment: Omg this is finally the end! I’m so sad, its bittersweet:’( . I’m sorry that its so long I decided to add both boys endings in the same chapter, I also apologize for any grammar mistakes and if any of it seems rushed. Thank all of you for reading this series and I hope to start another one soon. [I am working on the second part too my Dabi fic]. Thank everyone who has been here from the beginning and any new readers. You all make this fun and enjoyable. 

you matter and any issues you have are valid!

After you were taken to the hospital everyone wanted to hear what would happen to you. Classmates surrounded and bombarded Bakugou and Midoriya as they were escorted back into the dorm building. Mr. Aizawa couldn’t stay to watch the students since he had to go deal with the aftermath of your attempt. There were legal and security issues with how easy it was for you to have jumped off the school building. The students were supposed to be in bed but how could they go to bed when you were laying in a hospital bed alone after feeling so desperate for a way out that you jumped off a building. They had many questions, concerns, and comments about how they didn’t know this had been happening with you.

Midoriya rubbed the back of his neck, exhaustion evident in his eyes. Bakugou growled and shoved passed the ‘annoying extras’, trying to get to the elevator. He wasn’t blaming any of them and yet when he looked at them, he couldn’t help but think they should have tried harder. Had you heard his thoughts you would have slapped him across the back of his head. Midoriya smiled sadly at his friends while following after Bakugou to the elevator. “Sorry guys, it’s late and I’m tired.”

He wished he had all the answers to give but he didn’t. You weren’t necessarily talkative about your issues so he really didn’t know much of what was going on with you. He just knew he wanted to be there for you. Even before this he had always watched you with gleaming eyes, you were a beacon of strength and hope to him. Bakugou would never admit to sharing things in common with his childhood friend but he did. He also would find himself watching you, how hard you pushed yourself. He would watch you train later than everyone else, your clothing covered in sweat and legs throbbing. He had caught that broken look in your eyes a few times wondering where it could be coming from. You would always roll your eye at his asshole comments and demands. You weren’t afraid to stand up to him, you’d even beat him once during a sparring match. You were strong to him and he couldn’t help but wonder how someone so strong crumbles so fast. He wasn’t a stranger to anxiety and guilt, just like Midoriya wasn’t a stranger to regret and depression. They both had some kind of idea, a sliver, of what pain you might be going through. Truly it was tragic to know that you had been dealing with this longer than it seemed to outwardly manifest itself to them. Battling bad guys was one thing, fighting internal demons was worse because you couldn’t ask for help or call for back up. It was you against the girl in the mirror, against the whispers in your ears.

“Is she gonna be okay?” Uraraka was the one who spoke, having made her way to the front of the crowd. Midoriya couldn’t help looking at her with slight disappointment. He didn’t blame her but he did feel like she was in the wrong for what she had done. Bakugou on the other hand didn’t find Uraraka innocent. He hadn’t been able to confront her due to having to find and help you. Bakugou let the elevator open his fist clenching at his sides. Midoriya walked into the elevator turning toward Bakugou with a raised brow. He was confused before his eyes widened in realization. He rushed forward as Bakugou’s hand ignited. He turned and thrust his open palm directly at the gravity girl. “KACCHAN DON’T!”

Everyone who wasn’t frozen from shock rushed to try and stop the attack. Uraraka closed her eyes and waited for the hit. It never happened. No one had to stop him because he stopped himself. He scoffed looking at her with distain as he shoved his hands into his dirty tattered pockets.

“You aren’t even worth it.” Bakugou walked into the still open elevator door his shoulder brushing a confused but relieved Midoriya. He stepped back into the elevator looking at Bakugou who was burning holes into the ground. He looked up as the door started closing. “I blame you, she doesn’t.”

Simple words with such strength and meaning behind them. They were meant to replace his fist, to leave her having to suffer internally like you had been doing for most of your life.

The chatter commenced once again between the classmates; two different hands squeezed Uraraka’s shoulder. She didn’t think she deserved comfort right now and a few different people would agree with her. Though she knew that Bakugou was right. No matter who looked at her like she was a villain, you’d forgive her. You’d never blame her, just smile and say it was your own fault. The truth was honestly more heartbreaking and Uraraka wished she hadn’t said or did what she had. While she stood in regretful silence, your two saviors were standing in the elevator. It was quiet, other than the dull hum it gave. Midoriya walked out when it stopped at his floor.

“Night Kacchan.” He had spoken so lightly that Bakugou almost didn’t catch it. Midoriya didn’t look back or wait for a reply, he just walked away. Bakugou grabbed the door forcing it to reopen. “HEY, nerd.”

Midoriya slowly turned back toward Bakugou, both their eyes were bloodshot and held weariness. He expected to be told off since that’s how these things usually go.

“We saved her. We’re fucking heroes, right? So why does it feel like we didn’t do shit. Why does it feel like she’s still on that roof? I’m so fucking tired and yet I don’t want to sleep because she is laying is some fucking hospital unconscious because she jumped off a building. Why, why couldn’t she just reply on us.” Midoriya recognized the breaking in Bakugou’s voice. Except this time, he felt something similar. He too felt like you weren’t safe, like you’d just do it again when you found out that you hadn’t succeeded. He closed his eyes wondering what you felt alone on that rooftop. Had you waited for someone to save you? He had been in a similar situation back in middle school. He could hear everyone’s discouraging words, and Bakugou’s ‘suggestion’ play in his head. He could feel the cold breeze that he felt like he was back to the day he stood on a rooftop wondering if he could be a hero in his next life. He didn’t do it for so many reasons, the main one being his will to live. He wanted to live, he had some much yearning to show the world that he could do it, he could be a hero. He had something that you lacked. Midoriya opened his eyes and looked directly into the crimson orbs across the hallway. “We didn’t save her, we caught her. She probably didn’t want to inconvenience us. She thinks she’s the problem so of course she didn’t want to burden us. We wont ever know how she feels, all we can do is hope she still wants us involved in her life. We can only hope she wants to try living it again.”

Bakugou stared at Midoriya, really stared. He knew exactly what the boy had been thinking about when his eyes were closed. Bakugou had thought briefly about it as well. He thought Midoriya was thinking about when he had told the green haired boy to basically kill himself. He had no clue about the attempt. He felt a pang of regret again, as he grew, he thought a lot about how shitty he had been in the past. Hell, he couldn’t completely hate Uraraka because he had been in her situation to an extent. Bakugou couldn’t imagine how his life would have gone had Midoriya had jumped. Now he had to face the past along with the present to try and make a plan for the future, your future.

“I’m gonna protect her.” Bakugou’s declaration caused Midoriya to smile. He nodded his head lifting up his fist with determination in his own eyes. “That makes two of us.”

Bakugou would have usually snapped at the forest haired boy from copying him but he didn’t. Instead he returned Midoriya’s smile with a smirk. He let the door close heading up to his own room. Midoriya walked into his dark dorm room. He sighed against the door before sliding down it letting everything hit him. Tears rushed down his cheeks, this hurt more than any broken bone. He couldn’t get the image of you hurdling toward the ground out of his head. He covered his face with his arms before burying it into his pulled-up knees. His sobs were silent, and he suffered the way he imagined you had. He tried to picture the happy you. The one with fire in her eyes, the one that always got back up no matter what knocked her down. He wanted your eyes to be red from laughing yourself to tears, he wanted you to be tired from training and not from thinking your existence was exhausting. He wanted to tell you that he loved you and that he’d be there through this, but he can’t tell you that now. You needed to rest and so did he, if only his mind would let him.

Elsewhere, Bakugou was experiencing his own breakdown. He slammed his fist into the dorm door not caring if he breaks it. His knuckles bleed from the abuse. He doesn’t care, instead he punches it again and again until blood flows rapidly, down his hand and onto the floor. “Fuck.” Bakugou grabs a towel and throws it on top the blood staining the carpet. He stomps on it before giving up and laying on his bed. He sees the blood on his knuckles and thinks back to the dry blood on your arm from cutting into before fleeing the building. He hadn’t seen your self-mutilation himself but thinking about it made him sick. He sat up dry heaving into his trash can. How could he have been so stupid? Why the hell hadn’t he invited you that night to play video games? He knew exactly why, because he had seen how excited you had been all day. He was hoping this was what you needed to finally break your isolation. He was rooting for you and in doing so fucked up. He blamed himself for not making you hang out with him instead, which sounded selfish in a way but he meant well. Bakugou wipes the saliva from his lip before looking at his phone. He unlocks it and stares at the picture he has as his background. It has Kaminari and Sero laughing in the background with Mina poking Kirishima’s cheek. The main focus of the photo is you hugging him while he looks pissed as hell. The photo was taken by Momo who he had to ‘threaten’ to delete it, only after sending him a copy. He would never admit it out loud but he loved you. He loved the way you fought back against bullies, how you snapped back when he was an asshole. He enjoyed the far off look you’d get during class, the way you looked out the window with the slightest smile. He could listen to your laugh for hours. He was so fucked. How could he be thinking about loving you when you hated yourself. He just wished you could be happy, could understand how much you mattered not just to him. Bakugou drops his phone onto his side table before falling backward. His head crashes onto his pillows. You were alone right now, or maybe you weren’t. Hopefully your parents were with you, or maybe Mr. Aizawa went to make sure you would be okay. He wished he could have gone with you, that he could comfort you when you wake up. He wanted nothing more than to destroy all your problems and give you some of his strength while you tried to regain your own. Except he knew you were strong; it took strength to jump off a building.  

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The loveliest dream played behind closed eye lids. You were completely unaware of what was going on outside of your brain’s illusions. Unfortunately for you all dreams come to an end and you have to face reality. You were delirious when your dreams melted away and bright light filled your vision. Beeping invaded your ear drums. It smelled like sterilizer. You rubbed your eyes trying to fix your vision. When things were no longer blurry you found yourself looking around a hospital room. Your clothing was folded neatly on a chair along with a few bags and a blanket. Someone had been siting in the chair. There was a chart on the door which was closed. The window was dark and the light that was on only lit up parts of the room. You took in your surroundings feeling your heart race and chest cave in as your lungs failed you. The room was closing in on you as you curling in on yourself. You tugged the heart rate monitor when you wrapped your arms around your knees. Sobs came out with uneven breathes. You were having a panic attack. The door opened and a nurse peaked inside, your monitor was loudly beeping informing medical staff your heart rate spiked. The nurse walked over to the bed worry across her face as she gently put a hand on your shoulder.

“Honey are you okay? Are you in pain? Let me call the doctor.” Before she could leave your side, you spoke through broken hiccups.

“I failed.” The words were tragic really. The nurse knew why you had been there and hearing your words made her realize why you were crying. Regret, but not because you had done it, because you had failed at dying. The nurse covered her mouth as her own tears start falling down. You looked up at her with confusion. Why was she crying. You tried to steady your breathing, before moving your hand over her own. She looked up and saw the concern and care in your eyes. “What’s wrong? Why are you crying? Did I upset you.”

She stared at you like you had grown another head; how could you push away your own suffering to make sure she was okay. A slight laugh escaped her as she gently moved some stray hair away from your eyes.

“You really do have the heart of a hero.” She rubbed your shoulder watching you bite your bottom lip to try and prevent more crying. It didn’t work, you collapsed in a fit of sobs again. You wrapped your arms around your middle begging for this to not be real. Maybe this was your own personal hell. You weren’t a hero; this lady was delusional. She needed to get away from you before you ruined her life as well. You didn’t pay any attention to her getting up. She left the room cautiously. You looked around trying to find anything that could ground you. The only thing you keep thinking about is dying and how it was impossible that you hadn’t. What does this mean? What do you do now? How could you have fucked up this bad? You activate your quirk in the hopes to hurt yourself, one last attempt before the restraint jacket and padded room. Your fingers go to push into your wrist but there is no sting or pain, no blades just skin. You quickly look up knowing exactly what happened, Mr. Aizawa. You felt exposed, like you were nude or had all your dirty laundry in full view. Here was someone you respected, looked up to, having to use his quirk against you. You were like a villain. You couldn’t decipher his look do to his dry eyes. You dug your weaponless fingers into your sides curling into yourself again while crying. Warm rushes of tears crashed down your cheeks and onto the hospital gown. You didn’t care that he was watching you, at this point you were nothing but a bother to him. He didn’t think that, he would never think that about any of his students. Mr. Aizawa blinked stopping his quirk. His hair returned to its place against his scarf around his shoulders. He looked tired but not as tired as you. He would never wish that kind of exhaustion and mental trauma on anyone, especially not a child, which you were. He approached with caution, not like you were a savage animal, more like you were a scared injured one. He slowly squatted down next to your bed looking at the dark circles around your eyes and red across your nose and cheeks. He went to catch a tear but stopped with wide eyes when he heard you mumble. “I’m sorry sir, I caused you trouble.”

The apology was already pushing it, you had nothing to apologize for but the trouble part got him. Had he been so hard on you that you’d think he cared more about the trouble than your health? That hurt him, just like Bakugou and Midoriya. He sighed and shook his head finally allowing himself to catch the tear.

“You are no trouble. I’m here because I want you to get better.” Maybe his words could be taken different in your sensitive state of mind but regardless he meant well. The door opens interrupting your sobs and his attempt at comforting you. The doctor walked in followed by the nurse who cried for you. Her eyes were still red and lightly puffy. She smiled softly at you making your chest hurt. You didn’t deserve her tears or their kindness. The doctor stood in front of your bed waiting for you to look at him. You dared a glance up afraid that he would be disappointed but he was smiling like the nurse.

“Ms. L/n, I’m glad to see you awake. You gave us quite a scare. Would you like to talk about it?” Quite a scare? Really. You weren’t trying to scare anyone; you were trying to disappear from existence. You had scared yourself with an unsuccessful attempt. Now they knew. You wanted to talk but couldn’t get your mouth to open. You sunk your teeth into your lip until it bled. “It’s okay, you don’t have to talk right now. As you can assume you will be here for a while. Your parents are outside the room. I will send them after I have a talk with them about your recovery.”

He left the room and you wanted to run over and push one of the heavy machines in front of it. You couldn’t face them. You couldn’t look into their irritated and disgusted eyes. What if they don’t want you as their daughter anymore. A hand places itself gently on your shoulder before the bed dips from weight being added to it. The nice nurse is sitting next to you. “Don’t worry, they were so distraught when they heard the news. They haven’t left your side till an hour ago. They haven’t stopped crying and begging for you to be okay. Your parent’s love you and I think they aren’t the only ones.”

She smiles at Mr. Aizawa, who rolls his eyes. He knows the nurse is referencing the eighty different calls he’s had to take from crying and concerned students and faculty members. You look between the two adults before overhearing the conversation outside the room. Your parents are arguing something and you here a number and something about keeping you till your better. You knew that he was telling them you were being locked away. You could imagine the white walls with no windows. The cushion floors and pills that would melt your brain. You hadn’t realized you had started hyperventilating again. Mr. Aizawa rubs your back hushing you in a gentle way. The nurse gives you water and as you take it you see it, folded neatly on the chair with your camisole and sweats, Midoriya’s all might hoodie. You sit up, startling the two adults, before reaching out and grabbing the garment. The fabric is worn from plenty of use. It feels cold from sitting under the hospital air conditioner. You hug it to your chest deeply inhaling the pine smell. It was soothing and familiar. You noticed there were a few holes in it and wondered how they got there. You smelled it again curiously after noticing a different scent, a sweeter scent, like caramel like Bakugou. Why did it smell like him? You started feel cold, like you were back on top the roof. You close your eyes feeling your body fall over the edge. You grip the fabric tighter as you try to remember what happened before you fainted. You could hear a voice in your inner conscience. It sounded like Bakugou, he called you an idiot but he was crying. You couldn’t remember but he said it when he caught you, when he held you while plummeting to the ground. You were afraid to know what happened, but you needed to know.

“Mr. Aizawa, what happened. How am I alive?” It was painful to hear you say that. No one should ever have to ask that under these circumstances. He sighed rubbing the bridge of his nose.

“I can’t say exactly what happened because we showed up late. I got a call from Iida, he sounded panicked and I could hear the frantic yelling and crying in the background. He told me that you had hurt yourself after a confrontation with Uraraka and fled the building with bad intentions. I called All Might and the police. Other members of the staff were also informed afterward. I left to find you and found the class waiting for the police. They told me that Bakugou and Midoriya had run off to find you, to stop you.” He stops for a second because recounting the event brought back the sick drop in his stomach and the painful apprehension. You look at your hands that were perfectly still. You were afraid of the truth because you knew you had run off; you did feel guilty for upsetting people and causing such a ruckus. Had you just run off late into the night with no confrontation than things would have worked out, right? That’s when the last sentence finally clicks. You thrust your head up, your eyes staring into the side of your teachers face with curiosity and confusion. “Bakugou and Midoriya? They went after me.”

“They went after you and not only that. They um, they, they saved you. I didn’t see it since I was escorting the emergency vehicles to across the campus. All Might was outside the building. He told me in the darkness you saw fire and green sparks fly out the windows. The colors swirled chasing the same thing, you. Bakugou caught you and from what I was told Midoriya caught the two of you and used his quirk to get you back into the building three floors before the ground. The two boys emerged from the building, Bakugou holding you tightly against his body while Midoriya’s hoodie laid over your unconscious form. They both had a protective air to them, like guard dogs. Bakugou wouldn’t even hand you over to the medical workers and Midoriya, who is usually the understanding one, was defending his classmate’s behavior. They had caught you, they saved you and yet as I looked at them, they looked scared, defeated. They didn’t think they saved you and I guess in a way they are right. Regardless of that though, they tried to stay with you but they weren’t allowed to come with. They are probably still waiting to hear if your okay.” He got up and apologized but he had to take a call. You watched him walk out and you could slightly hear your parent’s voices down the hall. They were drowned out by the machinery beeping behind you. You were left with partial pieces of what had happened after you jumped.

You couldn’t lie to yourself and say that you didn’t believe they cared. You knew they did, you had experienced first hand their kindness and care this last week. Bakugou wasn’t nice to anyone and yet he had a soft spot for you. You were usually oblivious but you saw how he treated you. He made you food, he brought you water, he trained with you, and when you were sad, he let you be sad. He validated you and all your emotions no matter how dumb or fucked up they got. You got to sit on his bed with him during game night while all the boys whined that they never got special treatment. He cussed them out but you had just smiled. When you were around Bakugou no one messed with you and you received no jealous stares or judgement. Midoriya showered you in attention and kindness in his Midoriya way. His shy smiles and flushed cheeks as he’s talk with you about your aspirations and likes. He held onto everything you said and would give you a gift in relation to it. You liked a certain artist and he gave you a cd. You liked a certain animal and you ended up with a plush to cuddle with on your bed, not that you cuddled it or anything. You never had to eat lunch with others staring and whispering about you. The lounge was yours even when he wasn’t there. He always had a wrapped lunch and drink sitting on the table with an origami crane. You kept all of the ones you’d been given and they hung from string above your desk. If you had waited then you could have had a thousand cranes and just wished your depression away. You didn’t really believe that but everyone is allowed their childish dreams. Midoriya walked you to class when Bakugou didn’t. It felt like prison escorts at first but then it felt like friendship. Something you looked forward too. Midoriya gave you an All Might pen he had gotten in an exclusive set. It matched his and you couldn’t give the gift back because he argued against it. The pen was something you used every day leading to your breakdown. More important than physical objects were his quiet understanding and patience toward you. No matter how mad or depressed you got he always smiled, and never left your side. He always told you that you mattered and were amazing. You just wished you could believe the words because he spoke them with such sincerity.  

“Y/n.” You had just been thinking about the boys and hearing someone call your name made your heart skip a beat as you looked up with excitement and yearning. You wouldn’t say you were disappointed but a slight bit of you wanted them to be standing in the doorway instead of the doctor.

“May your parents come in?” You held your breath and almost denied the request but you couldn’t run away again. This was the moment you needed to tell them how tired you were, how you didn’t want to try anymore. You nod and the doctor opens the door wider revealing your parents. You expected stern harsh eyes but instead met gazes with grief stricken weary ones. Oh god had you been wrong about them. They rushed to your side sobbing words of regret and apologies. You couldn’t speak as your throat tightened and tears blurred your vision again. You were starting to replace Midoriya as the class cry baby. You sobbed out apologies of your own but not for attempting to kill yourself. No apologies for being a failure and ruining their lives. They were astonished, how could you think such horrible things about yourself. Had they not loved you enough? Had they not supported you. What did they do wrong? These were selfish questions and they realized watching you crumble into the thin hospital sheet, that this wasn’t about them, it was about you. How could they support you until you loved and supported yourself? That was the better question. You felt arms wrap around you enveloping you into a sandwiched embrace. You felt like a child again for a moment causing your crying to escalate into hysterical sobbing and gurgled words that couldn’t be understood. As they held you crying their own tears they spoke.

“We love you Y/n. We have always loved you and always will. We are sorry if we contributed to this. Please don’t ever hurt yourself. Please don’t leave us.” You couldn’t promise anything right now so instead you basked in the love and warmth they gave you. This was apart of healing, ripping off a bandage. This was a wound that had rotted, grew infected and needed to be reopened if it wanted a chance to try to heal again. You had your parent’s and they were disappointed, they never once insulted or belittled you. They just had love for you. You wished you could tell them that you felt better but you didn’t. When you closed your swollen eyes, you could still feel the cold breeze and see the twinkling stars as you plummeted off the roof. You couldn’t heal until you wanted too. It would be a process but you were willing to wait.

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You slept for a whole day after the visit from your parents. They stayed but left to attend other business knowing you’d be safe in the hospital. Mr. Aizawa watched you for awhile to make sure you didn’t wake up and try to use your quirk again. When you finally woke up the world felt heavy, like you had been laying in drying cement. You reached out for your water and pressed the button to call a nurse. A different nurse came in and you felt intimidated by the unfamiliar person. You played with the sleeves of Midoriya’s hoodie, which you had put on before falling asleep, before asking for some headache medication and the ability to take a shower. The nurse let you know that he had to ask a doctor what you weren’t allowed to do or take. It was a twenty-minute wait but you didn’t mind, it wasn’t like you were going anywhere anytime soon.

“Here is some food and medication. Someone will come in after you eat to get you situated to shower.” The man was gentle and slightly awkward which made you giggle. You thanked him for his help before staring at the gourmet meal. It was cold soba, a side of warm white rice and a bowl of sliced kiwis and mangos. You wanted to shower and that meant eating something. Hell, this meal was better than Midoriya’s cooking so it wasn’t like you couldn’t stomach it. You just didn’t know if you were ready to eat. You were afraid of regretting it, or getting nervous and throwing up. You needed to eat something. A piece of mango slipped into your mouth. You followed it up with a few bites of rice and half the cold soba. It was delicious and the meds really helped after you took them. The attendant that came in to take the tray seemed happy to see most of the food gone. If you were being graded on eating than you were sure you just got a high B which was better than some of your school grades. The best feeling in the world came from feeling hot water against your bare skin. You had to have the nurse in the room with you, you had realized that you were going to be monitored closely seeing as people were anticipating another suicidal breakdown. You didn’t mind the attention, just felt bad for taking staff away from other patients. The nurse had slipped you a floral scented shampoo which excited you. You wanted to smell like anything other than sweat, hospital, and dirt. Once you dried off you slipped the hoodie back over your head. You had your bra taken away incase you tried to hurt yourself with it. The wiring could be removed and used as a blade or you could hang yourself. You didn’t mind as long as you were allowed to have the hoodie. A new pair of undies and sweatpants completed the look. Your parents were going to drop off some clothes later. The doctor mentioned something about transferring you to a different part of the hospital, a recovery center that you’d live at until they figured out a plan for your mental health. You didn’t want to stay but knew if you left, you’d be on the roof again. Better safe then dead.

“You look comfy.” You jump and turn when you hear the familiar voice. Your eyes meet with a pair of green ones.

“MIDORIYA!” You are already rushing off the bed pulling the heart monitor off your finger as you tackle the boy. His arms had already been open waiting for you like they always were. He holds you trying not to think to much about the fact that your wearing his hoodie. You nuzzle your face against his chest sniffing him. He smelt like the real him, he felt like the real him and yet you felt that if you let him go, he’d disappear. You didn’t let go till he pulled away. “I thought I told you to call me Izuku.”

You were excited just a moment ago but when he mentioned his first name you thought about Uraraka. You could see her, an apparition watching with distain. You were afraid to hurt people and that included her. Midoriya noticed the way you changed. He moved forward but was thrusted backward causing him to stumble and almost fall. “Move nerd, your upsetting her.”

Your heart beats wildly as Bakugou walked toward you. You can smell his body wash, and his natural sweet smell. He knew you were upset before he had even entered the room. He knew why you were upset; Mina had explained everything that Uraraka did and said. He knew that’s who you were thinking about. His hand lifted up and you closed your eyes expecting a flick to your forehead but instead a gentle pat. You open your eyes and stare into his crimson ones.

“Forget about her Y/n. She fucking sucks. You don’t have to beat yourself up over someone like her. You are amazing and can do whatever you want, even if that thing is calling this nerd by his first name.” His words were snarling or growled like usual. Instead they were delivered like a pep talk. He wanted you to let go of Uraraka’s words. You bit your lip wanting to listen but found it hard. He notices your hesitation this time smiling, you almost yelp at how gorgeous he looks. “You don’t have to do what people say. You matter and so do your choices.”

Midoriya nods beside Bakugou which causes the angry blonde to hit him. He snaps about finding his own thing to say and not just agreeing with him. You watch the two childhood friends and start laughing. Your laugher brings their attention back to you. You were genuinely laughing and they both smile basking in it. “You guys are such children, stop being mean Katsuki. Izuku means well.”

You are still laughing with your eyes squinted closed while they blush at the casual way you say their names. You look up when the door opens and a nurse is pointing to your finger. Shyly you return to bed clipping the monitor. The boys come closer. Midoriya taking the chair and Bakugou remains standing. There is a dead silence between the three of you. You rub your arm not really knowing what to say. You don’t have to speak since they both speak up, Midoriya first followed by Bakugou.

“Are you mad at us?” Midoriya looks sorrowful at you, like a puppy that didn’t know what it got hit for. You didn’t get a chance to ask why.

“He’s asking if your pissed that we saved you.” Bakugou looks away from you and Midoriya looks down. You finally look at them. Not smell or feel them, no, look at them. Bakugou had sunken in eyes, the dark rings turning into black holes around his eye lids. The white of his eyes match Midoriya’s, red and irritated. He had been crying, they both had. Bakugou’s knuckles had obvious signs of quirk overuse and scratches from hitting something rough. Midoriya’s cheeks seemed hollow, like he hadn’t eaten or hydrated. His hair was messier and not in a casual way, in a neglectful way. They both exhibit pain, trauma, remorse. How could you have done this? How could you prevent it from happening again?

“You didn’t do anything wrong. It’s me, I’m not okay. ” The words slipped out and you didn’t feel bad for saying them. You weren’t okay and they needed to know this wasn’t a fairy tale. They both raised a brow like you had stated an obvious fake. The both responded at the same time.

“No shit.” Bakugou. “And that’s okay.” Midoriya.

Both boys knew you were broken and they thought that was fine. How foreign of a concept to you.

“You guys are okay with this? With me?”

“Are you stupid? No this isn’t okay.” Bakugou’s words were growled. “Kacchan.”

“Shut up, it isn’t okay that you feel like way. You need to get help and that’s what your going to do in this fucking hospital. We are going to be here with you. It okay to be sad and hate yourself but it’s not okay to live that way. You are going to get better. I fucking swear my future as a hero on it.” Bakugou’s words quaked with passion. You started crying and felt Midoriya rub soothing circles on the top of your hand with his thumb. You nodded along with Bakugou and Midoriya followed him up. “You can take all the time that you need, we will be here every step of the way. Even during the bad times and the breakdowns. We will never judge you.”

Sobbing was all you could do while comforting you was what they could do. They promised and they were going to keep their word.

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A month, that was the time frame the hospital gave you. You chose to stay and get help and what made it easier was having Bakugou and Midoriya support you. The month had gone by in strange intervals. You had bad days were you tried to hurt yourself and found sanctuary in the arms of Mr. Aizawa who had to stop you. He was patient and nurturing as well. The first week had more downs then ups. The second week Bakugou made you where his hoodie claiming you were becoming a nerd with Midoriya’s on. The second week also ended with gifts and flowers covering your recovery room. Notes from everyone talking about how much they missed you and tell you what was happening while you were gone. The third week brought you friends. Everyone visited on different days and in different groups. Iida had apologized for his lack of leadership and not helping you. You dismissed his words and gave him a smile and hug. Momo cried and apologized and that seemed to be the cycle. Jirou didn’t cry but she was melancholy. The girls and boys that came and went made you feel so many emotions and so many hugs and tears were given. Kaminari had snot dripping out of his nose as he hugged you. The moment Mina laid her eyes on you the world stopped. You screamed her name and she screamed yours. Kirishima literally had to remove her to leave which upset her. She told you she loved you and to never try to kill yourself again. A smile was given but no promise. Not till you could tell yourself it and believe it. The last person who came was Uraraka. She was almost not allowed in by blonde guard dog but you told him she could. You both sat in silence before she cried. She cried and you did exactly what Bakugou said you would. You forgave her and blamed yourself. She argued but couldn’t win. The gentle honest smile on your face hurt but she returned the smile.

“Let’s start over.” You hugged her goodbye and cried in Bakugou’s arms because the words still lingered and hurt.

The fourth and finally week had you shaking with nervousness. You were going home to your friends, your family. You were free and maybe not cured but you felt good. You could say you were okay and mean it. The pain was there but it was a phantom pain. You had a plan and knew that even if you had episodes and breakdowns that was okay and people were there to help you if you just let them. As you packed your bags and left with Mr. Aizawa you felt nervous and happy. He smiled as you said goodbye to the staff who waved with smiles and tears in their eyes. You had life in yours and that was much more than you had a month ago. The car ride was quiet and as you opened a bag you noticed something sticking out. It was a letter, actually there were two of them. Midoriya’s hand writing on one, Bakugou’s on the other. You were afraid to open them but did it anyway. Midoriya’s said.

[I have something I need to tell you, please meet me in the teacher’s lounge.]

Bakugou’s was similar in context but simply said.

[In front of the main campus building]

You had an idea of what this might lead to and this conflicted you because you loved both of them, however one of them had been there for you like no other. You had loved them even before this. You knew where you needed to go.

----------------------------------------------------------------

-MIDORIYA’S ENDING -

You had placed your bags back into your room and left for the exit before anyone could take your time. You almost collided with someone outside as your rushed out. The person gasped and you apologized reaching for the letter that slipped from your hands. The person picked it up first and read it. You felt true fear overtake you as you stared at Uraraka. She read the note and you wanted to cry and run but instead you gently held your hand out for it. She did something you hadn’t expected, she smiled. Her eyes held no jealousy or ill-intent.

“Uraraka, I”

“Don’t keep him waiting.” You both made eye contact and you had to rub your eyes to keep from crying. You both changed for the better and this proved she tried and not running away or giving up proved you were trying too. You left her in the doorway rushing off to find him. You saw Bakugou near the building he told you to meet him and you waved. He waved back realizing you were running past. He sighed before sadly smirking. “I’ll always be here for you even though you chose him.”

You couldn’t hear the words but you knew they were true. He wouldn’t hold this against you because this was what made you happy. This was something you wanted and chased after. The door to the lounge got closer and closer until you were breathing heavily outside of it. Your legs were wobbly and you felt light headed. You gripped the knob tight and opened the door. Midoriya was sitting in his usual spot. You both made eye contact and his cheeks, which were already red, grew deeper. You tried to steady your breathing and calm your chest but failed. You sat down across from him and felt for a second like you were back to the second time you had run. Well no more running. You put the letter on the table. He was quiet and for a second you thought maybe you were wrong. That’s when he stiffly stood up and bent forward in a bow.

“Y/n! I have been watching you since we starting attending UA together. I have always found you fascinating and strong. I always thought nothing could bring you down but I was wrong. You were much stronger than any hero I have researched. You fought, protected, trained, learned, and so much more all while hurting and fighting yourself. I think you are the bravest most amazing person ever and I don’t ever want to lose you or let go of you.” There was so much to unpack and he was talking so fast with no muttering. You were blushing and trying to think of an argument about being strong but knew it would be pointless. Midoriya was building up to saying the words and you didn’t know if your heart could handle running here and a confession.  

“Y/n L/n, I love you and I understand if you can’t love me right now but.” You had called his name a few times as tears filled your eyes. He wasn’t listening so you moved across the table, lifted his head and kissed him. He was shocked but relieved. His arms moved around your middle pulling you closer which caused you to fall completely over the coffee table and into his arms. You both laughed before you pushed you face into his chest holding onto him tightly.

“I love you too Izuku Midoriya. I might mess up but please bear with me.”

This wasn’t a fairy tale ending, it was life. You had gotten the boy but you were still struggling. There was no miracle cure, no prince charming’s kiss to make the pain go away. Just two guys trying to help you help yourself. For this exact moment you were okay and that was okay.

--------------------------------------------------------

-BAKUGOU’S ENDING-

The moment your bags hit the floor of your room you ran to the elevator. You were nervous but thrilled. You wanted to over think but stopped yourself. You hushed the bad words with confident ones. The elevator ding freed you and your legs moved forward right into Mina who was going to go see you. The two of you hugged and she spun you around. The letter slipped from your grasp and you quickly reached for it but she was faster. You watched her read the simple location and waited for the mocking or teasing. Instead she placed the paper back in your hand and winked. “You don’t wanna keep him waiting do you.”

You could have cried at her support but didn’t have time. How long had he been waiting? Was he still there? Worrying was pointless because as you ran path lit up by the evening sky you saw him. He was leaning against the building looking up. You slowed your pace and followed his gaze. There was nothing there but as your approached, still watching the sky, you realized this was the same building you jumped from. One hell of a spot to meet. You felt fear build up but stop when Bakugou spoke.

“When I caught you in my arms, I couldn’t use my quirk to get us back into the building. My first thought hadn’t been to call out to Deku but to protect you. I held you close and braced for impact. In that moment I wasn’t a hero. I was me and you were the most important person in my life and I needed you to live. I needed to see your stupid smile and hear your laugh. I wanted you to call out my name from across the school yard while all these stupid fucking extras stared confused because they don’t understand us. I couldn’t lose you, and I can’t lose you.” His attention had been up but was now focused only on you. Your heart stopped beating, or maybe it was beating too fast. Right now, you couldn’t tell. You could tell that you were crying. That he was crying. He aggressively wiped the tears away. “God, I don’t think you understand how I feel about you. I’ve been in love with you the moment I watched you suck at throwing that ball our first day. I had been so angry and couldn’t understand why you laughed and smiled even though you ‘lost’. I understood later when you told the shitty girls that throwing that ball meant you were one step closer to being a hero, to saving lives. You were, are what heroes should be, should thrive to be. You want to save people even when your suffering. You’d die for anyone even someone who hurts you. It’s stupid and reckless and it you. You are my hero more than I am yours. You never hurt anyone while you hurt. You never blamed others. I did all of those things and take out my regret on people. I want to be a little more like you but I also want to help you see that you can love yourself. I know it isn’t easy and hell it might take years but I’ll be here for every one of them.”

Bakugou was a mean, aggressive, and narcissistic person, at least that’s what people sold him as. You never bought it because you knew what profiling people did. You knew what life was like in that box and you didn’t want either of you in it. You hadn’t realized he loved you all that time and yet you could say he was dumb because it took your crumbling mental state for him to realize you might like him back. You looked at him and moved forward till your arms were around him. That sweet caramel smell filled your nostrils and he felt like home. A million thoughts moved around in your head but you pushed them down. The bad thoughts were still there but you didn’t have to deal with them alone, and now you understood that.

“I love you Bakugou, I have loved you for so long and I never could say it but now. Now I don’t have to be afraid because when I’m sad you are there.” Bakugou laughed and held you closer. His lips pecked yours once then again and again until you whined and he gave you a real kiss. His lips were hot and soft against your cooler healing ones.

“You can be sad when I’m not around. You don’t have to be okay. Not right now, in time.”

“Bakugou, why did you pick this spot to confess.” Bakugou let you go and pointed upward. You followed his gaze and heard his words.

“Because one day I’m going to bring you back here and you are going to stand on the roof and scream from the top of your lungs that you did it, that you are okay.”

He caught you before you could collapse as sobs escaped. He showered you in kisses because he knew you needed to feel this way to get better. He would hold you while you cried because this was just a stop on the way to that future, he wanted for you. He wasn’t here to save you. You could do that yourself. He was here because he loved you.  

#bnha #bnha x reader #bnha bakugou #bnha midoriya #midorya x reader #bakugou x reader #katsuki bakugou x reader #mha #mha x reader #mha imagines #izuku x reader

[quicksilversquared]

Move to Safety: Chapter 2 (of 6)

After Adrien just happens to spy Nooroo in his father’s office, he’s sent into an panic. His father is Hawkmoth, which means that Adrien is in serious danger.

Thankfully the Dupain-Chengs are more than willing to step up to the plate and lend a helping hand.

links in the reblog

The next akuma attack was three days post-discovery. Adrien had been concerned- or, rather, frankly paranoid- about the sudden lull, but Plagg had reminded him that his father was busy at this time of the year, the end of the school year and exams lining up almost perfectly with the push to finalize the summer line, coordinate the summer runways and photoshoots, and in general make sure that Gabriel was in the best possible position going into the summer season. It meant long hours going over designs and then making sure that the finished product lined up with the vision, of making sure that staff were lined up for all of the events, of ensuring that Gabriel's international locations were doing well...

Well, it was really no wonder that Hawkmoth's activity had slowed for the time being.

During his first year as Hawkmoth, his father had left the coordination of pretty much all of those things to Nathalie and a couple of the senior designers, presumably so that he could keep akumatizing people at the same rate as he had before (the official excuse, of course, was that he had still been suffering from grief because of Mrs. Agreste's disappearance and wouldn't be able to juggle everything). Apparently things hadn't gone quite as perfectly as Mr. Agreste had wanted (and it was really hard for his designers and other staff to get last-minute things done when akumas were interrupting them practically every day), forcing Mr. Agreste to switch the majority of his attention to the company during the frantic rush. That in turn meant that his attacks had to step down for a period.

Of course, dialing back on the attacks didn't mean stopping them, as evidenced by the akuma alert lighting up Adrien's phone.

Adrien swallowed a groan as he silenced the alarm, sliding his phone back into his pocket before anyone could notice it. At least the akuma had showed up between classes, making it easier to slip away. He headed to the bathrooms, hiding in a stall until the other boys in the bathroom had cleared out and it was safe for him to transform. Chat Noir slipped out the bathroom window, then charged across the city to join Ladybug, who had gotten there before he had. She was already focused on the fight, eyes narrowed as she spun her yo-yo and sent bits of the melted marshmallow that the akuma was shooting at her flying away.

Chat Noir really, really wanted to taste the marshmallow and see what it was like- it smelled amazing- but Ladybug had had words with him about eating akuma-generated food before and he really didn't want to get scolded again.

(But marshmallow...)

"It's a chocolatier," Ladybug told him breathlessly as he dropped down next to her. "He was trying to make something with marshmallow filling and his intern accidentally tipped the entire vat over and spilled it. Or that's what I'm guessing, at least. It's hard to tell."

Chat Noir frowned as he extended his baton, pushing the Chocolatier back. "He got this upset over that?"

"It wasn't the first time that the intern has spilled stuff, I'm guessing."

"Gotcha."

Soon enough, their battle was in full swing. Chat Noir focused on the akuma as much as he could, but in the back of his mind there was the constant reminder that it was his father behind this. The same person who had (occasionally, rarely, once in a blue moon) tucked him into bed at night when he was younger, the same person who had used to proudly smile when Adrien first started modeling and showed a talent for it, the same person who Adrien had spent years of his life trying to please- that was the man terrorizing Paris, preying on people's emotions for- what? Presumably Mr. Agreste was trying to get Mrs. Agreste back, to prevent whatever it was that had made her vanish.

She wouldn't have wanted all this to happen, of that Adrien was sure.

The lump in his throat only went away when he remembered something Marinette had said the previous night as they had worked on their homework together shoulder-to-shoulder on the floor, wrinkling her nose in disgust as she pointed out that Gabriel Agreste, world-renowned fashion designer had been (perhaps somewhat indirectly, they didn't know how the akuma victims' personal preferences played into their outfit design) responsible for the parade of what were frankly fashion disasters. He had been the one to come up with the names, presumably had some hand in dealing out the powers, had definitely been the one responsible for his own (incredibly tacky) design as the Collector, and yet...

Audrey Bourgeois had just written a scathing column about the akuma designs, in an odd twist of irony. No wonder his father had been in a bit of a foul mood right after that.

"Well, that was a bit of a sticky situation," Ladybug joked as she released the purified akuma at the end of the fight. She watched it go, fluttering over the sagging mountains of melted marshmallow. "Not a bad akuma, though." Her teasing grin turned towards him. "Good job not eating any of the marshmallow."

Now that the fight was over, guilt and anxiety promptly weighted down his gut like lead. He should tell her about Hawkmoth now, before they had to split and go back to their respective schools. But the lump in his throat was back in full force now, and he could barely form words around it. How was he supposed to tell Ladybug without letting on who he was? He hadn't figured that out yet. "I- yeah."

He didn't want to tell Ladybug who he was, not yet. He was worried about her treating him differently and thinking that he couldn't handle the fights anymore, worried about her judging him for not figuring it out sooner, worried- well, that it could mess everything up. He had begged Marinette right away after they got back up to her living room not to tell Ladybug who he was, in fact. Not that he thought that Marinette would go behind his back to do that, but he just- he wanted to be sure. He couldn't handle another reveal, not even with his partner.

She had tried to- to protest, he assumed, or at least tried to say something, but he had cut her off. With her family's support, he could manage his father's defeat without adding more identity reveals to the mix.

Ladybug's expression turned anxious, even as she tossed her Lucky Charm into the air to cast the Cure. "Are you okay, Chat Noir?"

"I-" He was choking on his own words. Ladybug's fingers ran down his arms, wrapping around his wrists steadyingly. "I, uh-" He had to spit it out, he had to!- "Yeah, I'm fine. Just- just tired."

Ladybug's eyes scanned over him, then nodded. "Okay. Take a nap? I want my partner feeling his best."

Chat Noir managed a smile. Today wasn't the day he would be telling his partner about his father, apparently. Next time, for sure. He had to pull himself together soon. "Right."

  Adrien couldn't help but be thrilled to be allowed to have dinner with the Dupain-Chengs that evening. Nathalie hadn't even needed to consider the request before allowing Adrien to go, which was a relief.

If she or his father had noticed that he wasn't sleeping at home anymore, she wouldn't be allowing him out. The fact that he was still getting his freedom meant that so far, his nightly escapes were going unnoticed.

Of course, it was still early. Not even an entire week had passed yet.

"It's going to be weird to go home and then come right back," Adrien told Marinette with a small laugh as he helped her chop the veggies for dinner. He had headed over to her family's house right after school, and was going to be staying there until the Gorilla came around to pick him up (walking to and from Marinette's place to his own and without supervision could only happen during broad daylight, apparently), and then staying at home for all of thirty minutes or so before going right back over. "I'd rather just stay over, but I know they wouldn't allow it. I mean, it took how long for them to allow me to sleep over at Nino's house, and he's, uh..."

"Also a guy," Marinette filled in when Adrien floundered. She reached over to scoop up his chopped vegetables and toss them into the frying pan. "I get it. And I know you've mentioned that you aren't planning on telling Nino about, uh, everything, and you staying over here, but you could probably tell Nathalie that you're going to sleep over there on, like, a Friday or Saturday evening, so then you can sleep in on the weekend instead of having to wake up super-early. Unless she would check in with Nino's family ?"

Adrien blinked at the suggestion, pausing mid-chop and then setting down his knife to properly consider it. It was really, really tempting- they were just coming up on their first weekend with the new arrangement and even the thought of having to get up early so that he could go back to the mansion without being spotted sucked- but would Nathalie check in with Nino's family?

Ugh. He really, really wanted to, though. Being able to sleep in and then actually properly get to sit down and eat a Dupain-Cheng breakfast? That would be amazing. But did he dare risk Nathalie finding out that he was lying about his whereabouts?

"We could also claim that we're having a sleepover for all four of us here," Marinette offered after a minute had passed without Adrien saying anything. "That might be more acceptable. We can say that it's so we can do lots of studying for finals together, without wasting the time to go home and then meet up again the next day."

"Maybe," Adrien agreed, liking that more. "And we can actually study, and invite Nino and Alya over during the day." He grinned, remembering their last "study" session. "As long as they actually study and don't pull us off-track again. We'll have to tell them that they'll get booted if they start making out or flirting with each other again." He glanced over at Marinette. "This weekend, do you think? Or next weekend, so that I can be more fully rested going into finals?"

"Why not both?" Marinette smiled at his startled expression. "Mention both at once, and see if she'll go for it. If she says that two is too much, then decide which weekend you want to go for."

Adrien smiled. Marinette was so smart. "I'll do that."

They worked in silence for a few more minutes, Adrien finishing with the vegetables and Marinette taking over the cooking from him, expertly stirring things together and adding in spices. It smelled amazing. Adrien hovered, not sure what he could do to help, but he knew that if Marinette could think of anything for him to do, she would tell him.

"Ah, Adrien, I was hoping that you would be here!" Mrs. Cheng said cheerfully, sticking her head around the door. "I need something from your room and I was wondering if you could grab it for me."

Adrien blinked in surprise. "I- I mean, sure, I can go in, but- why do you need to wait for me? It's your house, you can go in."

"Oh, I couldn't! That's your room, sweetheart. I'm not going to go in there without your permission." Mrs. Cheng smiled at him. "It's your space now, and I don't want to intrude on it."

Adrien frowned, still not quite understanding. "But... it's a guest room. In your house."

"And we gave that room for you. We don't want to intrude on your space. It's your room now, not the guest room." Mrs. Cheng glanced over at Marinette, then back at Adrien. "Would it help to have you redecorate a bit? I know it feels like a guest room, but we can change it up a bit if it would make you more comfortable."

"Yeah, we didn't exactly have much time to redecorate for you when you moved in," Marinette chimed in right away, before Adrien could protest. She reached over and shut off the burner. "We can go do something about that right now, if you want. Dinner can wait for a little while."

Adrien glanced at Mrs. Cheng, but she was nodding and sliding into the kitchen behind Marinette to take over the cooking. "You two go do that. I'll take over this, and then I can come help once this is in the oven."

Blinking in surprise but not resisting- there was no protesting when any of the Cheng women put their minds to something, Adrien had learned that long ago- Adrien let himself be dragged down to the guest room's door, then nearly ran into Marinette when she drew to a sudden stop in front of the door. He blinked, then realized what was going on when Marinette stepped aside and looked at him expectantly.

She wasn't going to go into his room before him. He had to go in first and then invite her in.

"I'm really fine with you guys coming in," Adrien told her with a small, self-conscious laugh as he pulled the door open to the guest room that he was staying in. "I'm used to it. I mean, at h- at the mansion, the maid comes in when I'm not there all the time. And then Nathalie and my father just come in when they want- I don't know if they come in when I'm not there, but when I'm there, they just come in if they have something that they want to tell me. The Gorilla always knocks before coming in unless it's an emergency, but he doesn't always wait for a response before he does."

Marinette was frowning. "That's not right. I mean, sometimes my parents come into my room, but it's only when I've given them permission, or there's an emergency, or- okay, maybe sometimes they get a little over-excited when I have, uh, friends over and then they pop in, but they've gotten better about it after I talked to them about that. It's important to have privacy in your own room."

Adrien smiled slightly. "That sounds nice. I'd love to have- well, I think it sounds nice, to have a space that's private. To only have people come in who I want to come in, and when I want them to come in..."

"You'll have that here." Marinette waited until Adrien waved her in before entering the room. She glanced over the room, then winced. "Oh, this really looks like a guest room. It doesn't look like you've used the bed at all!"

"I wanted to keep it tidy!" Adrien protested. "In case...uh, in case anyone came in, I guess." He ran a hand over the top blanket. It had taken a few minutes that morning to get it perfectly straight, with sharp corner folds. "I wanted to keep it looking nice."

Marinette was staring at the bed in- surprise? Horror? "I think I was the one to make the bed last before you came, and it didn't look nearly this neat. And I only make my bed, like, half of the time when I get up. You don't have to get up early to make the bed to- to photoshoot standards."

Adrien swallowed. "Right. Okay."

"I mean, if you want to, that's a different story," Marinette said hastily, apparently completely misunderstanding his expression. "Then it's fine! But if you're just doing it because you think we expect it of you...that's not the case, not at all."

"Right." Adrien shuffled from side to side, looking at the room. "So, uh... where are we meant to start?"

He honestly didn't know. After all, it was a very nice room- a pale blue on the walls, some decorations that Mrs. Cheng had probably brought back from China and family photos hanging on the walls, some with Dupain-Cheng family members who Adrien recognized and others with people that Adrien didn't know- the Cheng grandparents, he was guessing, and some other extended family members on both sides. There was a bookshelf with an assortments of books- some baking, some cooking, some about family histories and culture in China. There were a couple books in Mandarin, and others in Italian. There was a dresser with an attached mirror part that had a gorgeous embroidered piece of fabric draped over it, with a couple knick-knacks placed on top of that, and a very standard bed: sheets, two pillows, a couple plain fleece blankets that had been folded at the foot of the bed, since it was too warm to use them. Under the windows there was a radiator, painted gleaming white. A storage chest sat at the foot of the bed, and a small table was next to the door, the perfect spot to set keys or a bag to grab on the way out.

In short: it might have been smaller than he was used to, but it was cozy and, like the rest of the house, had been put together to reflect the Dupain-Cheng family and their interests, instead of just being pulled from an interior design magazine.

"The bed," Marinette decided after a moment. "We have a bunch of sheets that we can use for this one, actually- uh, we keep them in this closet, actually."

Once again, it took Adrien a second to realize what Marinette was doing, and then he smiled. She wasn't going to go digging in his closet without him going first. He rounded the bed- there wasn't as much space as he was used to, but it was hardly cramped- and opened the closet, stepping aside so that Marinette could step in front of him to scan the piles of linens.

No matter how important Marinette found it for him to take the lead in his own room, the fact remained that he was significantly taller than she was and if she was going to help him out at all with figuring out which set of linens to pick, she needed to be able to actually see the options. The closet was pretty full of sheets and blankets, and Adrien had no idea which ones were the right size for his new bed.

"Okay, so this bed is the same size as mine," Marinette said, glancing back at the bed. "Which means that you'll be looking at this side of the closet. And, uh, I really had a thing for having a differently colored bed every week when I was younger, so that's why, uh..."

Adrien laughed. "That's why you have an actual rainbow of sheets in that size, you mean?" He reached out, running his fingers over the pile. There were a good eight or nine colors at least, which... well, that was pretty impressive. "How long did you spend in 'zillion-different-colors' phase?"

"A couple years?" Marinette shrugged at Adrien's expression. "I don't remember. But there were enough sheets that they never really got worn down, so we just stuck them all in here when I grew out of that and decided to decorate my room in a pink theme instead."

"Ah." Adrien looked at the closet again, then reached for a set that was a blue that reminded him of Ladybug's eyes. "I like these."

"D'you want help switching out the sheets?" Marinette asked, reaching in to help Adrien pull the sheets out without disrupting the rest of the stack. "And- hmm. We have a couple blankets that could go with those sheets. Not that you really need a blanket right now, since it's almost summer and it's getting hot, but if there's any cold nights and you get chilly, it's better to have them out and ready."

Adrien nodded as he picked out a green blanket to go with the blue sheets, though he had a really hard time imagining ever feeling cold here. Aside from the fact that they were above a bakery- the warmest possible business Adrien could possibly imagine, the entire building just smelled warm, if warm could have a smell- the whole atmosphere was just so warm and friendly and welcoming. "Help would be good. I can tidy up a bed in the morning, but making it from scratch I'm not great at." He grinned, remembering the one and only time when he had tried to make his bed at the mansion, after the maid had to leave early due to a family emergency and had only gotten as far as washing and drying Adrien's sheets. He had assured her that he could handle the actual bed-making so that she could go right home and... well, he had tried.

Fitted sheets were hard, that was all he was going to say. It did not help that his bed at the mansion was so large.

(There might have been some less-than-optimal language that he let loose while wrestling with the fitted sheet. No one could prove anything.)

"It's easier with two people, at least," Marinette said cheerfully, setting the linens down at the foot of the bed so that she could start stripping the sheets that were there. "Easier to wrestle with the mattress that way."

Adrien grinned. "Yeah. I've only got a white belt in mattress wrestling. Just a beginner."

Marinette snorted. "Does wrestling have belts? I thought that was karate."

"You question my qualifications? How dare!" Adrien flopped down on the bed dramatically, pressing the back of his head to his forehead. "...but you might be right."

Marinette laughed and gave his side a gentle shove. "Get up and help me, you lump."

"And now I'm being bullied!"

Adrien loved Marinette's unrestrained laughter.

It didn't take long to remake the bed with the new sheets. The blanket that Adrien had grabbed was a little large for the bed, but it didn't seem to bother Marinette. They just made sure that there was an equal(ly large) amount of blanket hanging down either side of the bed, placed the pillows on top, and then stood back to admire their work.

"You can bring some of your books and things over and we can make space on the bookshelf," Marinette said, leaning over to look at the bookshelf. "My parents can get another bookshelf and stick it in the living room and move their books there so that you have the space. They just have things in here because it had just been an extra room. And then I know I have pictures of you and Alya and Nino and I, and one of you fencing, and- oh, we can look. These others can probably find a new home, too. And the storage chest- that should be empty. It's mostly there so that visitors could put their suitcases inside and have them out of the way."

Adrien stared at Marinette. "That- that's a lot. Like, getting another bookshelf and moving it- that's pretty permanent. Like, Ladybug and I will defeat my father by the time summer starts, probably."

"Yeah, well, you'll need somewhere to live afterwards, won't you?" Marinette sat down on the bed, patting the space next to him. Adrien settled next to her, unable to resist the invitation. "And maybe the city will try to make arrangements for you to be able to stay at the mansion, but you can stay here, too. I know it's not as big, but..."

"I love it here," Adrien assured her, leaning back on his hands and admiring the room, too-wide blanket and all. He didn't need things to be perfect, or huge, or expensive. "If your parents are all right with me being here, I'd love to stay. I've had enough of the mansion for a while, I think."

Marinette's head rested against his shoulder. "Okay." He could feel her shift as she settled. "I'm glad you like it here. We just want you to feel like it's actually your space."

He still didn't think that that was entirely necessary, but Adrien wasn't going to argue with them. Instead, he leaned back into Marinette's side, enjoying the quiet warmth. After a few seconds, though, he couldn't keep quiet any longer.

"I haven't told Ladybug yet," Adrien said quietly, dropping his head back against Marinette's. "I tried, during the last akuma attack, but I chickened out."

"I- I can tell her, if you can't," Marinette offered after a moment. "Next time she comes nearby during patrol, or during an attack."

Adrien shook his head. "I swear that I'll tell her at the next attack. I just needed more time to figure out how. It's only been a few days." He swallowed, remembering the way that his throat had closed up around his words. He had wanted to tell Ladybug, but he didn't know how. "I don't- I've been trying to think of how to tell her without giving away my identity, but I just blank."

He could hear the frown in Marinette's voice. "Are you sure that you don't want to just tell her who you are? I don't- she doesn't seem the type to judge you about the whole situation, and it seems like it would be easier-"

"Not right now. It's not safe." Maybe the final battle was (in theory) in sight now that he knew Hawkmoth's identity, but he was leaning towards the safer option of not letting any more people find out who Chat Noir was. He had seen the downsides of when superheroes knew each other's identities in action with Rena Rouge and Carapace, and they did not need anything like that happening again. "Like, whenever we have distractions going on in our civilian lives, it shows during battle, even if we try not to let it. It's the same when we have superhero stuff that we're distracted by. This would probably be the same. Like, what if we know each other? What if we slip up and yell the other person's civilian name during battle?"

Marinette nodded, an odd expression on her face. "Yeah, I can see where that would be bad."

"It would be awful. Our advantage would just be gone." And since they currently had a serious one-up on Hawkmoth and Mayura, they really didn't want to lose that. "So I'm not going to tell her until Hawkmoth is defeated. And like I said, I don't want her treating me differently, either, and I worry that she might if she knew that Hawkmoth is Chat Noir's father. I can still fight."

Marinette was watching him consideringly, but she smiled when he looked up at her. "That's understandable."

"I just want to be careful, and not knowing each other's identities has worked out for us pretty well so far." Adrien let out a long sigh, trying to let go of the stress that he had been holding on to. "After he's in jail, though, I want to tell her. Hopefully we'll be allowed to then."

"I'm sure you will be." Smiling, Marinette leaned forward to give his hand a gentle squeeze. "But for now, let's not worry about that. After all, we have a room to redecorate."

  By the time dinner was ready to come out of the oven, the guest room was...well, not quite Adrien's room, not yet, but it wasn't nearly as guest room-esq as it had been before. Marinette had pulled some photos she had of him and their friends from her room and put them in some empty picture frames that they had around so that he could put them up in his room, and Mrs. Cheng had cleared off the desk and dresser surfaces so that he could put some of his things on them. There was space on the bookshelf, too- apparently Marinette's parents had an extra bookshelf in their bedroom and could move things there- and even a little in the closet, though Marinette's parents were still brainstorming where they could move some of the stuff in there so that it would be accessible when they wanted it.

Adrien still thought that it was overkill, but the idea of having a room that he knew people weren't popping into without his knowledge was- well, it was really, really nice. And he couldn't deny that being able to make the space his own was a fun idea, and if he was going to stay there after Hawkmoth and Mayura were defeated, like the Dupain-Chengs were clearly planning... well, he would feel more comfortable if he felt like the space was really his own, Adrien knew that.

It was just that they were going so out of their way to accommodate him. Marinette's parents were busy, he knew that, and yet they had spent a not insignificant amount of time clearing out the guest room so that he would be able to move in more fully.

"You can bring more stuff over tonight, or whenever you have the time," Marinette was saying as they sat down around the table. "Books and more pictures and whatever knickknacks you want to have here."

"The Jagged Stone CD you signed," Adrien said immediately, grinning when Marinette blushed. "And the posters!"

Mrs. Cheng laughed. "Any possessions that my daughter didn't make and sign?"

Adrien had to think about it. "Uh...there's the jacket that Marinette made me last year. That isn't signed."

"I embroider my signature on everything I make," Marinette reminded him. "So that's signed, too."

That made Adrien pause. "Oh. Uh, then I guess other gifts that I've gotten from friends? I'll see as I go along, probably. And I'll probably wait to move a lot of stuff until after school is over." The and until after my father and Nathalie are in jail went unsaid.

"We can help," Mr. Dupain assured him. "We might need one person working the counter at all times, but the rest of my staff can keep the kitchen running in back. Just say the word."

Adrien couldn't hide his smile. "Thank you."

"And now- did you have a good day at school?" Mrs. Cheng asked, changing the topic, and Adrien couldn't help but smile as Marinette chimed in, telling her mom about the exam review that they were doing at the moment.

He loved having people who he could talk to about his father, because it made the whole process a little less lonely and he knew that he didn't have to handle it all alone (excluding Plagg, of course), but it was nice to talk about normal things, too. To be part of a normal family that sat down and ate dinner together, instead of sitting alone at his family's long dining room table and hoping that his father might show up.

Adrien wasn't going to be hoping for that anymore, that much was obvious. Even when he had dinner at home- and he was going to have to, he knew well enough that he wouldn't be able to get away with going to Marinette's house for dinner every night- he would be hoping that his father and Nathalie were busy, or even better, out of the house entirely.

It wasn't likely, but he could still hope.

The Gorilla picked Adrien up after dinner and he spent a cursory hour in his bedroom at the mansion (no one even checked in on him, which was unsurprising) before zipping right back over to Marinette's house. She let him in via her balcony, and Adrien gave her a quick hug good-night before heading down to his room.

As Adrien settled into his bed, he couldn't help but smile. The room felt a lot more comfortable now, even though they had only really changed a few things. That, and knowing that the Dupain-Chengs considered it his space, not just an in-use guest room...

He hadn't even known that he wasn't fully relaxing before but now, Adrien could sleep soundly.

#Miraculous Ladybug #my writing #Move to Safety

[kittybellestark]

It’s Like Falling From The Sky

Hi I’m exhausting and things suck rn so i wrote this 

I know this is coming out but I really can’t promise that I’ll be able to be very active on here with everything going on with my Dad. 

If you have mad e a fic request I am working on it have no fears I have not forgotten I just needed to write out my emotions so I’m sorry.

I’ll get this on AO3 in the next few days

TW: Flashbacks, Minor Character Deaths, Re-Visiting Peter’s Traumas, Depression, Probably Disassociation.

-

Peter remembers. He hated remembering this. He couldn’t even talk to other people about this. Well, he probably could, but he wasn’t supposed to. 

Dr. Josh said so. 

He didn’t like Dr. Josh very much. He was there when it happened. Dr. Josh went through the same thing Peter did. Sometimes Dr. Josh still came to visit Peter up until the time Skip happened. Dr. Josh was there for Peter’s first trauma yet he wasn’t there for the next one. And Peter hated him.

Peter remembered the plane. 

Officially Peter was never in that plane. There was no records of Peter ever being there, or Dr. Josh being there. But Peter remembered it in perfect clarity. It was one of the only memories Peter had of his parents. 

It was fine. The plane ride. It was boring and he played Uno with his parents. Dr. Josh stayed seated in a corner, close to the front. It was a nice plane, a private one Oscorp had provided them. This plane was newer. Peter hadn’t ever seen it before, this wasn’t the plane his family normally took. He had liked the other plane more, that plane was familiar. 

He was the one who noticed the smoke. It was coming out of the engine. They had thought the shaking was turbulence, just a little bit of wind. The smoke clouded the sky around them. 

Peter remembers that his parents buckled him into a seat, before getting into their own. Dr. Josh went to go into the cockpit, but the door was jammed. He couldn’t get in. The locking mechanism had ceased, there was no way for Dr. Josh to get in there and Peter saw the moment he realized this. The doctor sat down and buckled in.

The lights flickering was the scariest part to Peter. That was when everyone knew things would get worse. Peter could feel it, he was able to feel his parents fear. Their fear was suffocating. It was the way his mother sobbed and his father dropped his head into his hands, shoulders shaking. There was no battle to be fought, they weren’t going to be able to get out of this one.

Oxygen masks dropped and Peter’s mom made sure to get one onto his face. She kissed his forehead and whispered goodbyes. He cried hard, holding onto her hand with both of his. The door had ripped off the side of the air craft and that made things cold. Cold, cold, cold. And that didn’t make sense to Peter. Outside was bright orange, the colour of warmth and his parents bedding. 

Nothing made sense. It was bad and scary and Peter hates remembering this. He hates it. Peter hates that he was there and that officially he never was. There’s been no one to talk to, no one who can understand. It was in the news, that the only two passengers onboard had died and it infuriates Peter. There was four passengers on that plane and two died. 

Peter remembers the plane going down. He remembers screaming, then he remembers waking up. There was metal scraps of plane all around him and fire, there was so much fire. He was still in his chair, strapped down to it and he couldn’t get out. He remembers calling out for his parents and then looking around for them. 

Peter remembers seeing his mother laying there on the ground. She was awake but gasping for air, her one hand on chest, a leg bent at an unnatural angle, hair melted onto her. Peter was afraid of his own mother. He couldn’t find his father, couldn’t see him, but Peter could hear his screams. Peter could hear him in pain and that scared him too. He feared the people who were meant to be safe. Peter hates himself for that too.

Peter hates Dr. Josh. He hates Dr. Josh for surviving and Peter hates that Dr. Josh for saving him and not going back for his parents. And Peter hates Dr. Josh for leaving him, for not showing up anymore. 

Peter hates Dr. Josh. He never expected to see him again. But the thing about being Peter Parker is that everything goes in the exact way that Peter just can’t predict. 

Becoming Spider-Man was never anything Peter thought he would ever do. Meeting Tony Stark was a pipe-dream, and this mentor-mentee thing was so wildly out there. Nothing ever seemed to make sense and Peter hated that too. It was always a whirlwind and never any time to process any of it. Never any time to make sense of anything.

Peter couldn’t help blaming Dr. Josh for that too. 

“You good kid?” Tony finally, finally asked. 

Distractions are good, welcomed even. Anything was better than his thoughts or the memories of his parents dying. Distractions are easy and they help. Things aren’t so painful if he’s distracted. It’s why parents teach their kids to laugh when they get hurt, it distracts them and then everything is okay.

“Oh, yeah. Sorry- I just got caught up in my head.” 

Peter couldn’t help running his hand through his hair. It was a nervous tick, at least that’s what Dr. Josh had said. Built on his anxiety after his parents death. Peter didn’t believe that to be factual. It was a way to comfort himself, his parents used to run their fingers through Peter’s hair when he was sad or sick or tired. 

He could tell that Tony didn’t believe him. Why would he? Peter hasn’t been focused recently. He needs to focus, but he just can’t seem to focus on anything other than the thought of Dr. Josh recently. It’s a problem and Peter knows it. But it’s just so easy to put the bad things on him. 

Had Dr. Josh at least saved one of his parents, Peter wouldn’t have gone into foster care. He wouldn’t have been placed into May and Ben’s home, Skip would have never been his babysitter. Peter wouldn’t have had to go onto the Oscorp field trip, and Ben would have never been murdered. If just one of his parents had lived Peter wouldn’t feel the grief or hatred he does now. More of his family would be around, he wouldn’t be made fun of for being the reason his guardians all keep dying. May would be happier, she’d have her husband and a in-law. There would never be any over-due bills. So Peter hated Dr. Josh, and it wasn’t fair to do that to him, but Dr. Josh was supposed to be a doctor. He was supposed to save lives.

“Earth to Peter.” Tony waved his hand in front of Peter’s face. “You zoned out on me while I was talking. We have a meeting to go to remember, you’re supposed to pretend to be doing intern-y things. With the Avengers?” 

Peter shook his head, trying to clear it. It was too busy most of the time. Every thought just started and ended on top of each other. But he was going into a meeting, and the Avengers were supposed to be there, so his brain needed to be clear. He couldn’t think about what is felt like to fall out of the sky and not being able to catch himself.

“Sorry, yeah, I’m here. Which Avengers?” 

Smile. Breathe. Listen. Try and be normal. Do not dwell. Not on the past. 

“I mean Cap is going to be there, he’s a total bore by the way. He drones on and on, I think we’ve all learnt to fall asleep to him talking without him noticing, you’re allowed to zone out on him. Natasha is going to be there, she’s sneaky about things so don’t fan boy too hard around her. Clint will also be there, he’ll keep things interesting. You get bored in there Clint is always doing something strange to get everyone’s attention, you two will get along like a house on fire, I’m only a little scared. And Bruce will be there, you’ve met him multiple times already though Pete, so we aren’t going to hyperventilate this time. You’re going to remember to breathe and not overwhelm Bruce with every question you have about one of his research papers.” 

Tony liked to talk with his hands. Grand gestures. It was calming to watch. Peter liked how expressive Tony was. The man said he wasn’t good at expressing his emotions but Tony showed his emotions in his movements. He was easy to read if you knew what to look for, and Peter did. Peter liked knowing. He didn’t get to know much in his life, he could never predict what was happening next and that hurt. But he could see how Tony was feeling and he could act accordingly and he liked to be able to control that.

“I’ve seen the PSA’s at school I think I’ll live. Black Widow is very intimidating so I don’t think you’ll hear me talk more than five words, she’s awesome but she could kill me in the time it takes me to blink. I cannot annoy her Mr. Stark, I’m comfortable being alive.” Tony laughed, Peter joined. “I mean really, I’ve met Dr. Banner and Black Widow has become involved with the government and on tv all the time. An no self respecting teenager doesn’t hate Captain America for those PSA’s at least a little bit. I know them all except Hawkeye really, but he’s the only Avenger that is still supposed to be a secret agent so it’s not like any pictures of him exists. Which is very annoying Mr. Stark. Ned and I hacked into your servers once to see if we could find any pictures of him- this was before I met you by the way- and you didn’t even have anything there.”

Yeah, that sounded like Peter Parker. Laughing, joking, he sounded normal. He was not spiraling. There was no imagining the lights flickering or smoke filled sky. Peter couldn’t talk about it so he shouldn’t think about it. There was no use in his brain remembering the sound of his father’s screams. He could remember so many better things, more useful things. It was over ten years ago. He had more recent trauma, plane trauma at that. This really shouldn’t be the one bad thing his brain goes to first.

Right. He’s supposed to acknowledge and follow and be normal. Peter has this. There’s no plane falling out of the sky today. He is okay. 

“I wish I was surprised about you and Ted hacking into SI servers and then getting into my own, but frankly nothing you do could really ever surprise me at this point. You’re too smart for your own good, I do expect you to take over the world Roo, but for my heart could you wait until you’re done high school.”

It was the right time to laugh. Tony was laughing, so Peter laughed. It didn’t make sense to Peter how his actions couldn’t surprise Tony. Sometimes Peter’s actions even surprise himself. But it’s not really like Peter knew himself very much anymore, not with his life continuing to be so unpredictable. Sure he had gotten used to the fake smiles, and pretending to be fine, deflecting, but that wasn’t really his actions. It just covered them up. 

Peter followed just a little bit behind Tony, it helped ease the anxiety, like a shield. He also knew it wasn’t good to use Tony like this. It was just easier sometimes, when he was scared. This wasn’t a good pattern, but neither was the rest of his life. The world owed him just this bit of comfort sometimes.

“If I’m going to take over the world then I have to take everyone by surprise Mr. Stark. Including you; unless you help me of course. I could use you for your government connections, sway them over into our favour. It really wouldn’t take much.” 

Peter shrugged as Tony stepped into the room, shaking his head while looking back at him. The room was loud as Peter stepped in, but it’s what he had expected. Stories have been told to him about the Avengers, loud and rambunctious, conversations on top of each other. Even with Thor off world the group made up for it in this small room.

“Everyone this is my personal intern. Yes I trust him, no he is not a secret love child, no you can’t interrogate. Yes he will be sitting in this meeting, no you don’t have anything to worry about. Okay? Great, Brucie you know Peter, everyone else this is Peter Parker, Peter this is everyone.” 

It’s like falling from the sky, when he see’s the Avengers. He smells the smoke and feels everything quake. He can hear his father screaming and his mother gasping for air. Everything is warm orange but he’s cold and it doesn’t make sense. He is falling from the sky and it’s way too fast and he cant keep his hold on his mothers hand. He is falling and he can’t catch himself and the world is coming at him way too fast. 

He needs to breathe.

It hurts. 

He’s trapped in the seat and everything is on fire and his family is dying.

And there is Dr. Josh pulling him out and taking him away.

Breathe. He has to breathe.

Peter is not there.

Not in the middle of no where.

Certainly not with his parents.

But he is here. In the Avengers Tower. With Dr. Josh.

He just needs to focus. He needs to breathe. His brain is running too fast and there’s too many thoughts. Peter hates him, hates Dr. Josh. The plane crashed, his parents were alive and he was carried away from them. They died by this man who was supposed to be a doctor. Peter couldn’t help but feeling the anger, over a decade of anger boiling inside of him.

Peter was never good at not saying what he thought. Words were just out of his mouth before he even thought them. It’s always been good to stop people from questioning him too much, but now it was nothing but a weakness. There was no control over this, over his words and Peter hated that he couldn’t control them. He just needed to control something and yet he couldn’t even control his stupid words.

“You killed them.” 

It didn’t even sound like his own voice. He wasn’t supposed to talk about this. He was told not too. Officially Peter was never there. And he was never meant to talk about this. He should have forgotten this.

Captain America, Steve Rogers was the first one to move, pushing himself backwards in his chair before standing up. Peter didn’t like the stance Steve took, he recognized it from school and from muggers too. It was made to intimidate. It worked. Peter found himself pushing against Tony. He didn’t know if that was to shield himself or to shield Tony. It felt selfish though. 

“Kid?” Tony whispered. 

He was clearly hesitant, scared of Peter, for Peter? Honestly, Peter wasn’t so sure. All Peter knew was that he was angry, and the man who ruined his whole life was just sitting there, like this was no big deal like it was nothing. He sat there, just barely a fake look of concern like he didn’t even recognize Peter.

“You don’t even remember me. You’re the reason my parents died, you introduced yourself as a doctor and clearly you fucking lied. They were dying in front of us. Remember that? Instead of helping them you got me out of the seat I was in and walked away. We were the only two who survived, but funny enough neither of us were put on the reports. Officially we never went on that plane. Unofficially you dropped me off in Connecticut to go into foster care, but officially I ran away from my babysitter and managed to sneak onto a train. You remember me now?” The words felt like acid, and Peter didn’t like the way the words felt in his mouth. But he was falling. “Oh, no? See, you introduced yourself to me as Doctor Josh Wilkes.”

Peter didn’t notice how he made his way further into the room. He wasn’t very aware of his body or the words that were spilling out. There was just so much pain, so much that he never talked about to anyone because they were never supposed to know. His world fell apart in front of him when he was too young to understand and Peter never got to tell anyone.

“Peter, I think you’re having a severe panic attack. Can you breathe with me?” That was Dr. Banner. 

Dr. Banner was in front of Peter’s face, enough to block his view. Tony’s arms were wrapped around Peter’s waist just enough pressure to help remind Peter where he was. It wasn’t enough for Peter’s thoughts to stay in his head, but his head had been so loud for so long. Letting it out felt better but also worse. He was finally being heard, but this wasn’t what he wanted to happen. 

Black Widow- Natasha moved around the room, stationing herself in front of her friend, and Steve looked ready to yell. None of this was what Peter wanted. He needed to gain control. He needed to take a breath and start thinking. But here was Dr. Josh, Clint Barton and everything just felt so much more like a lie. Peter felt like he’d been removed from his body and scrambled before being shoved right back in.

“No. No. You told me you were a Doctor, that you saved lives. That was all a lie. Every word you ever said to me was a lie and I hate you, I do. You told me that plane crash was our secret, that I couldn’t tell anyone. You stole my parents lives, and you ruined mine, and now you’re just sitting there, silent. You’re an Avenger, you are supposed to save lives. Why didn’t you save mine?”

There were tears streaming down Peter’s face. He’d been lied too. The man he hates wasn’t even a real person, just some persona that was put on. He hated an Avenger and he never thought he would. Peter hates Clint Barton for what was done to him. And he hates that Clint just sits there not saying anything. Looking at Peter with his eyebrows raised but otherwise looking unaffected.

He had to leave. He needed to leave and go find a place to breathe. It’d been too long and everything hurt too bad. Peter was only 6, barely had any life and yet had it all torn from him.

Peter waiting another moment for Clint to say something.

“You’re a coward.” Peter pulled himself out of Tony’s arms. “I’m leaving. I don’t ever want to see you again.”

He was leaving and Peter knew it was wrong. This was everything he hated but he should be more mature about it. Peter was raised to treat people with respect, never to shout, never call someone names. It didn’t matter who the person was, he should always treat them the way he wishes to be treated.

The past should be behind him and he just needed to stop experiencing it. Peter needed to walk away from his past even if that left his parents behind him. His mom wasn’t gasping for air anymore and his dad wasn’t screaming in pain, but this felt the same as it had then. When he was picked up and carried away fighting to go back. 

The elevator was too small and it felt like falling. There wasn’t enough air as they went down, down, down. They were going towards the ground way too fast and everything was too cold and- he wasn’t there. Peter is in New York and he’s leaving his past behind. It’d be easier to forget it, but that can’t happen. For now he’s in New York and he is not falling, things are controlled now. He isn’t controlling them but things are controlled and that has to be enough.

“Peter, do you want to talk about it?” 

That was Tony. Tony was there walking out of the building with him and he didn’t even notice. Someone was there for him and following him out into the streets and he is upset. This is going to be like Ben all over again. It was all too familiar. Peter is crying and too caught up in his head and he’s being followed by someone who cares again and he is in New York. Last time Peter had a gun held to him because he saw something he shouldn’t and Ben stepped in. Tony would do the same thing as Ben, Peter knows that. 

Planes don’t fall out of the sky often but it happened to Peter twice. Muggings happen often, Peter has seen his fair share. It could happen to him again. History repeats itself, everyone says that. This can happen again too, it could. All because of Dr. J- Clint. 

“You can’t let him kill you Mr. Stark. I can’t lose anyone else, I can’t watch anyone else die. You and May are all I have left.”

Breathe. He just needs to breathe and it’ll be okay. Peter knows this he just needs to get himself under control. One person should not have any control over him, his life, not like this.

“Alright kiddo. I’m staying right here, and you know May isn’t going anywhere either. We’ll stay by your side no matter what. So lets talk, tell me what isn’t official or don’t. Whatever you need right now.”

Peter nodded. He hated how the air was acid but he had to do this. He’s held it all in, every bad thing. He didn’t talk about things, never the bad things, those were made to be secrets. But it never felt good, it always ached, to keep it all inside. Peter never told May and Ben about his parents, all they knew was the official story. He had never told them about Skip, never talked about it more than what was necessary after May walked in. Never said anything about what happened to give him his powers. He didn’t tell May about watching Ben die. He never said anything to Tony or Happy about a building falling on him or crashing the plane on Coney Island. These memories, these trauma’s are not made to be shared, but he couldn’t hold in in anymore. 

His body wasn’t his own and Peter hated not being aware of his actions, pulled too far into the past to understand his movements, his surroundings. When Tony pulled Peter back inside and to the penthouse he hardly recognized his own motions. Sitting onto Tony’s couch helped Peter come back to himself, just the tiniest bit. 

For the first time ever Peter told someone the unofficial story. There was no talking about nothing. He tells Tony about what it was like to notice the smoke and the flames. He talks about being exposed in the sky and holding his mothers hand as they fall. He speaks about seeing his mom, hearing her and his dad. He explains what is was like to be carried away, fighting to be with them, knowing they’d die. Peter tells Tony about what it’s like in foster care, about being considered a flight risk because officially he ran away from his babysitter. 

Peter tells Tony everything.

And Tony listens. 

Peter thought he’d feel better. He never expected to feel like every problem is solved, but he thought he’d at least feel the tiniest bit better. This wasn’t better though.

Maybe it was a mistake.

These big, scary traumatic things were supposed to be kept to himself. They might have changed his life but they didn’t need to affect anyone else’s.

“This is the first time you’re telling anyone any of this?” Tony hand’s Peter hot chocolate as he asks this question, it feels like a stupid question to Peter, he wasn’t supposed to talk about it so why would he tell anyone. 

“I was told I couldn’t tell anyone about my parents. Dr. Josh, Clint, he sat me down and told me no one could actually know how my parents died, that it was our secret. He’d check in on me for a few years after to make sure May and Ben didn’t know. Clint told me that the big scary thing things that happen to a person aren’t made to be shared with others and that no one would believe me, so I didn’t tell anyone. I’m supposed to do what adults tell me, it’s not a big deal.”

Tony hummed, sipping his own drink. Peter didn’t like the way Tony looked at him, like a mystery that revealed itself. It was close to the look Peter gets when people find out his parents are dead and one of his guardians died too, but it wasn’t quiet it. Tony also held some level of anger in his eyes and Peter didn’t know who that was directed at.

“Peter you literally exploded when you saw Clint, that was a pretty big deal. Him telling you not to share the first big traumatic thing to happen to you is a pretty big deal too, especially because he told you that he was a doctor. It’s all big deal.”

Peter groaned. He should have had better control. It was already a bad day and his head was too clouded with the past. It was a mistake. A blip. Peter should have done better.

“FRIDAY, could you ask Clint Barton to come up here?” 

FRIDAY confirmed and Peter realized that this was another mistake. Why couldn’t he just stop himself? He wasn’t good at this. This was a mistake. Peter was raised to do what was right but he only made mistake after mistake. Everything he’s done was a mistake.

“What are you doing kid?”

Planes fall from the sky. Planes that hold Peter have fallen. They are world ending and Peter’s world has ended over and over. He blamed the person that Clint was pretending to be. Peter blamed a lie.

“He forgot me and then I told him he killed my parents and didn’t save my life.”

The elevator dinged out a final warning to what was coming before the doors opened. This time Peter was prepared to see the face of a man who haunted his life. Clint walked in and stayed standing away from Peter and Tony on the other side the coffee table. 

“Sorry for yelling at you. It was a bad day. I was taken off guard and said things without any thought.” 

Unrecognizable. Cold. Unattached. Empty. Peter’s voice didn’t sound nice, there was no personality. But it had been a long day. There was too many emotions all at once and Peter was tired, it was nearly too much today. All his thoughts and feelings were all too wrapped together, snaked around his heart and lungs. In his throat and into his jaw, squeezing too tight; a mess of what should be neat and organized.

“My mission was to protect you. I was assigned onto that plane and to your parents to make sure you were properly protected. Your parents were agents in the scientific division of SHIELD and were assigned to Oscorp to get intel. We had reason to believe that Oscorp was going to stage a kidnapping to experiment on you. My only job was to keep you safe and when that plane went down I had to get you out of the area before you were taken. SHIELD agents were with your parents by the time we got to safety. We didn’t tell you that you’re Dad’s spine was crushed or your Mom’s lungs were filled with blood, there was no saving them. Even if I helped them first they would not have survived, if I was a doctor it wouldn’t have made a difference. My mission was to protect you. I had to drop in after that every once in a while after that because Oscorp still had their eyes on you. I got reassigned when they stopped following you.”

Peter’s mind reeled. Hardly able to process the words being told. None of it made sense. It didn’t feel much like the truth. Peter still ended up at Oscorp and bad things still happened. 

“Well you failed then. You’re mission was a failure.” Peter couldn’t help but laugh. “Oscorp doesn’t give school’s tours, especially not high schools. But they gave my school a tour, but only my class. You did not succeed at your one job. I was there, got separated from my class. After that some Oscorp employees tended to show up where I was for a few months, offered me summer camp opportunities a few internships. I never took them especially not once I got this internship. But they never stopped. Oh, and I was friends with Harry Osborn, for years actually, went over to his house all the time until pretty recently.”

The spider bite. Peter always thought it was an accident. A coincidence. But now it was making sense. The lab assistant who gave him the wrong directions to the bathroom did that on purpose. He ended up in a room filled with spiders instead of a hallway he expected to lead to the washroom. Oscorp followed him to see if Peter had changed, not because they thought he did something bad or stole from them. It was their plan. Had he of taken the internship who knows what else would have happened. 

The mugging that killed Ben, that was probably Oscorp too. It would make sense. Especially if they were watching Peter. The gun was pointed at Peter first, meant to shoot him. Maybe they expected Peter to do something, confirm any theory they may have had about him. Instead Ben got in the way and died. And Peter didn’t do anything that day, or that week, not even that month. Oscorp stopped reaching out as much after that. They weren’t at his favourite places anymore and he got less mail from them. Every once in a while they still offered an internship to him, but it wasn’t a consistent thing like before. There wasn’t anything consistent.

“Clint, I think it’s time for you to leave.” That was Tony. Tony was nice. Tony helps. “Peter, buddy, you need to remember to breathe. C’mon Roo, I know that was a lot but breathe for me, please.”

He couldn’t do it. Everything about Peter was a lie. The man he blamed was a lie. The idea his parents could be alive was a lie. The reason Ben died was a lie. Everyone lied to him, his entire life, every traumatic experience came from a lie. Being Spider-Man came from a lie and working with Tony rooted from one too. There was no truth. He was never given the truth. 

Peter couldn’t do it. He didn’t want to. Nothing was true. How could he do anything real, or true? His life was a pile of lies stacked on top of each other in a way to control him and to manipulate. There’s no control here, this was a fall and every time there was something to grab onto it just disappeared. Nothing was real, it wasn’t real. Someone else pulled the strings on his life and now they’ve all been cut and there’s nothing holding him up anymore. 

Alone. He’s alone and he can’t do this. Just a kid who lost everyone on a lie. Peter never had a chance to control anything,  Everything was set up for him to react in certain ways, he had no choice, probably never did.

“Peter, buddy, c’mon, breathe for me. Don’t do this, you’re going to hurt yourself. I know this was a lot, but Roo, you’ll get through this, I know this was a lot, your whole life thrown at you in one go. I’m here with you.”

Focus on Tony. He needed to breathe, gain control here. But this was wrong, all of it was wrong. Peter had been through a lot but this was something else entirely. How can any expect him to get through this? 

“No. No, Mr. Stark. I can’t- I can’t do this. I’m not- it’s not- it’s a lie. I can’t do this.”

He was sobbing, face tomato red. Tears were streaming down his face, his body shook just like the plane that went down. He couldn’t calm down and he hated himself for it. Peter couldn’t control the way his thoughts always went to his biggest traumas, and now he couldn’t control the way he was reacted. Maybe none of this ever happened, and that’s just a lie too. There’s no proof that he isn’t dead or in a coma or even lost his mind. It’s all been a lie this far, it could be a lie past that.

Arms wrapped around Peter. They held him tight and he fought them at first trying to break free. He needed to be free of them, free of his thoughts. He only struggled for a few minutes before finally being able to relax, entire body going limp.

Everything was too much. It was too much.

And Peter was falling from the sky. Falling too fast and too hard into the rest of his life. There was no way to catch himself, not at these speeds. He was just a six year old with too much heartache. No Spider-Man there to catch him, no webs strong enough. Peter was falling from the sky and he couldn’t stop.

But Tony is there, and Tony will be there to catch Peter before he crashes.

-

Taglist (DM/Send an ask if you would like to be added):

@erinbeanie @jean-and-diet-coke @dead-inside-pt2 @they-were-cloudsinmycoffee @parkersjiggle @7peternotparker7 @thatonecrackheadshipper @kevinthewoman @faline4you @lynxshinon @narutoyaoifan @pastelwheeler

#irondad #peter parker #spiderson #tony stark #avengers #marvel #mcu #spiderman #iron man #hurt peter parker #whump peter parker #clint barton #steve rogers #natahsa romanoff #bruce banner #marvel cinematic universe #irondad and spiderson #peter and tony #sad peter parker

[stusbunker]

AGA: An Open Tab

A Kinky Supernatural Fan-fiction AU

Featuring: Dean Winchester/ Benny LaFitte

Written for: @spnkinkbingo and @thoughtslikeaminefield

Square Filled: Bear

Word Count: 1731

A/N: 18yo+, Benny’s turn to visit Dean at work this time. Internalized bi-phobia, objectification, sexual tension.

A Gentlemen’s Agreement Masterlist

It was another Friday night at the bar, Dean was slinging drinks and Anna and Bella were waiting tables. Jack was decidedly late, again. Dean bobbed his head to the music and tried to stop watching the old smoke stained clock on the wall. It was the second week in a row and Dean was no longer interested in giving Jack the benefit of the doubt. 

Dean had been helping Cas out at the bar for six months. Cas, one of Dean’s closest friends, talked Dean into bartending on an as needed basis, since the college kids Cas hired had been notoriously flaky. ‘As needed’ had somehow become Dean’s taxing second job. Which was how when Cas’s own nephew couldn’t bother to show up on time, Dean was left to step up, again.

The afterwork rush was heavier than normal and the music already seemed too loud. Dean just finished pouring the last of the beers for Anna to take back to the pool tables when Jack finally made his appearance, excuses flying out of his mouth. Dean knew he shouldn’t be so short with the kid, but Cas sure as hell wasn’t going to be.

“Save it and go help that group at the end of the bar, will ya? I’m already backed up.” Dean watched as Jack balled up his hoodie and shoved it beneath the register. The redheaded waitress gave Dean a knowing look as the hapless youth washed his hands. 

It was going to be a long night.

Castiel Novak made his nightly appearance just after ten. Eight years ago, when he inherited the bar from his brother, Cas decided he needed to look like a business owner, despite his young age, so he started wearing suits. If the weather was cold enough, he’d even wear a trench coat over them. Dean never had the heart to tell Cas he was overdoing it and, of course, Cas never learned better on his own. 

There was a time when Cas’s obliviousness had been endearing to Dean, but lately it only seemed to add to Dean’s exhaustion. Dean guessed that showed progress. Then again, he was still the dancing monkey behind the bar because Cas needed him there, so maybe it wasn’t a lot of progress.

After so long, Dean had learned to pick Cas’s voice out of the crowd, from any point in the room; unintentionally clocking his path like a sonar. Dean finally put eyes on Cas when he made his way to check in with a few of the regulars at one of the booths. He saw Cas again when he initiated some awkward small talk with the waitresses. Lucky for them, they were too busy to be stuck on Cas duty for long. By the time Cas got behind the bar, Dean had a pack of women in one corner that refused to let him walk away. Which left Cas to figure out the shape of things all on his own.

Jack could barely answer Cas’s questions; he was so overwhelmed with orders.

After turning down a second round of shots with the ladies, Dean lost track of Cas. After ten minutes, Dean figured Cas had left for the night, easing any anxiety Dean had held for the remainder of his shift. If Cas was gone, Dean didn’t have to play too nice with the kid and he could close without too much hassle.

Which was exactly when Benny walked in the door.

Dean didn’t realize Benny knew where he worked, but Benny sure as hell meant to find him there. It had been two weeks of dirty texts since they met, and Dean nearly jumped over the bar to kiss him; he was so excited. But then Dean remembered where he was and what he was: in his longtime crush’s bar and still in the closet.

He doubted it would hurt his tips at this point in the night, but a fat dose of reality was the next best thing to a cold shower he could get.

Dean nodded at Benny, tongue teasing the back of his teeth. “How’d you find me?” 

“A girl’s got to have her secrets,” Benny chided. “I’ll take a bourbon, if you’d be so kind.”

Benny reached into his back pocket and Dean tisked at him. “C’mon man, your money’s no good here.”

“Is that so?” Benny smirked, before taking a lip smacking sip of the double Dean had poured him. Dean couldn’t wait to feel that stubble burning his skin once more. “What if I want to show my appreciation for the fine service?”

Dean shook his head and licked his lips.

“What?” Benny blanched. 

Dean leaned in and whispered a reasonable six inches from Benny’s ear.

 “After the fine service you gave me, you’ve got an unending tab,” Dean insisted.

    Benny chuckled, rich and melodic. It made Dean feel like a teenager, so eager to hear that laugh again. A couple sat down beside Benny and Dean got pulled away into a string of orders after that. Jack, apparently, had given himself a break, and left Dean to hustle for a solid thirty minutes alone. All the while, Dean made sure Benny’s drink was filled.

Once Jack returned, Dean bailed. “Hey, I gotta grab some stock, your turn to do the one man show.”

Without a passing glance to Jack’s stunned face, Dean rounded the bar and nodded Benny to follow. Dean headed straight down the back hall, which led to the coolers and the office. Benny was a casual ten paces back. The second the walk-in’s door closed, Dean pushed Benny against it. Dean’s lips desperately latched on to Benny’s mouth. A mouth and beard that felt even better than Dean remembered.

Benny took Dean’s face in his massive hands, and slowed the kiss, drawing it out, and savoring it. He leisurely turned them until Dean’s back was the one pressed to the door. Which made Dean sigh just as Benny broke the kiss. Dean hooked his fingers into Benny’s belt and dragged him closer.

“You drive me crazy, you know that?” Dean snipped, slotting his thigh between Benny’s.

“I had a notion.” Benny half smiled. “How long we got back here?”

“As long as we need. Forget the kid, he can figure it out.” Dean moaned as Benny lifted him off his feet with the nudge of his thick thigh between Dean’s legs.

“You say that like you actually are gonna leave him hanging. We both know you’re not that guy,” Benny teased, breath ghosting over Dean’s throat. Dean blushed.

“Yeah, you’re right, but I don’t want to think about leaving yet,” Dean whispered, hands sliding under Benny’s shirts and roaming his barrel chest. Dean could only imagine the power behind all that breadth. Benny sucked on Dean’s pulse point and began to rock into him.

Dean slid his fingers through Benny’s chest hair, relishing in the manly down. Dean dropped his left hand to palm Benny’s covered cock. The weight of him in Dean’s hand only fueled them both. Benny took Dean’s gasping mouth once more and they fell to a place beyond words.

The bass of the music pounded through the insulated walls, the only reminder of where they were at all. Dean started to undo Benny’s fly when suddenly the melody line and a cacophony of voices flooded the cool air. Dean hadn’t realized they had moved off the door until it was already open.

“Hey! There you are! Jack said you were getting stock. We’re out of Light and—,” Cas trailed off. “Is everything alright?”

Cas eyed Benny suspiciously.

Dean cleared his throat and shrugged, arms swinging awkwardly. “What? Yeah, everythings fine. Just grabbed an extra pair of hands for the kegs, man. Why?”

“You seemed flushed, Dean,” Cas noticed. Of course, Cas had suddenly become observant at that moment.

“That was Light and Hacker-pschorr, boss?” Benny interrupted. 

“Yup. Alright, Cas, thanks. Why don’t you go and tell Jack we’re on our way?” Dean patted the door frame to get his point across. The door swung closed as Cas, still squinting, turned to go.

Dean unapologetically adjusted himself in his jeans as Benny dragged his fingers over the labels on the rows of silver barrels.

“Sorry about that,” Dean whispered, not looking Benny in the eye.

“Hey,” Benny called out to him, reaching for his elbow. “No matter to me who sees us. You good, cher?”

Dean inhaled deeply through his nose, and nodded. “Yeah. Or, I will be.”

Benny cocked his head and gave Dean an understanding smile.

“It’s like that, huh?” Benny guessed.

Dean closed his eyes at the disappointment he was sure to see etched onto Benny’s face. “I didn’t— Sorry, this isn’t fair to you,” Dean tried.

    “Oh, Dean, that’s your battle to fight. But just so you know, I don’t scare so easy,” Benny winked at Dean and squatted down to lift his keg.

    Dean about melted on the spot. How’d somebody like him find such a class act?

Benny shuffled out of the cooler. With his eyes on Dean the whole while, full of silent promises, Benny backed out of the door. Dean pinched his forehead and sighed before bending down to grab his share of the load. 

“Coming through!” somebody bellowed.

Back to reality they went, with a whistle and a string of cat calls announcing their passage through the packed bar. Dean could have sworn he heard just as many appreciative male voices as female ones and he tensed in fear. He didn’t usually feel so exposed, but Cas’s interruption was just another reminder of all of the parts of himself he was used to being hidden.

“That’s my kind of bear, alright,” a skinny guy gushed to a petite brunette. Dean rolled his eyes, but he couldn’t blame the man for ogling Benny. He certainly was all bear.

Once Dean was back behind the bar, he felt suffocated with the amount of people surrounding him. He managed to hook up the kegs quickly, leaving Cas and Jack both breathing sighs of relief. Dean looked passed them to find Benny, who tipped his head and gave Dean a wistful salute. 

“Thanks, Benny. I’ll be in touch,” Dean called out over the ruckus of the crowd, hand raised in a motionless wave.

Benny lifted his chin in agreement and disappeared out the side door.

Tagging:

@flamencodiva @dolphincliffs @dontshootmespence​ @fookinghelljensensthighs​ @fangirlxwritesx67​ @dawnie1988​ @mrswhozeewhatsis​ @cosicas-cuquis​ @foxyjwls007​ @tumbler-tidbits​ @wingedcatninja​ @defenderrosetyler​ @ericaprice2008​

^*^*^^*

Part 3: Quality Assurance

#spnkinkbingo #denny #dean winchester/ benny #dean/benny #mlm #bear

[sailingintothenight]

“WANNABE.” T.H. Imagine.

And what if after years of chasing each other like a cat and mouse, you and Tom started to wonder if you wanna be something else in each other's life?

A/N: I am posting a one shot after weeks of writer's block. I hope you like it. It's 9:30 pm in Peru and it's still April 28, so it's still my birthday! Give it a try. Pleaseeeeee! And yes, I borrowed a scene from Mean Girls (Because I loveeee that movie)

“Hello God, it's me again, (y/n). What's up? I know we haven't talked much lately, but, hey, listen, I have a favor to ask you- I have behaved well, I haven’t gotten drunk at any crazy party of any Hollywood star and I haven't accepted drugs, ever: I'm afraid my grandmother will appear in my room as a ghost and pull my blankets in the middle of the night, plus, I haven't make out with any Stone-cold Hollywood hottie, and trust me, I've had more than one chance. Anyway, about the favor–”

"Yes, but (y/n)'s grandfather invited us to his birthday party..."

Tom's voice startles you and cuts off your internal dialogue, turning you back to the reality.

It’s 6 am. The sun shines in the clear sky, and you are on a flight back to England in a luxury privet jet that is about to arrive at the airport, while Haz, Harry, Tom and you are sitting in comfortable velvety seats, with the view of morning sky on your left side. 

The exciting memory of your last recording still seemed to run through your veins, too exciting to let you sleep. Because that was the end, the goodbye after incredible months. All your efforts from the past months were hidden behind that last performance that looked like a fantasy, except for the kiss, ugh, you had to erase it from your mind. But now, you're going back home, ready to take a break away from the set-up bridge and blue and green backgrounds, away from the makeup artists who gave your face the final touches of the magic of Hollywood, far from the suit of a superhero who had just won her last battle and who got the cute boy, Peter Parker.

But not far away from Tom Holland.

Because evil takes a human form in Tom Holland, your lifelong neighbor.

How do you even begin to explain Tom Ho– Stop, people say that if you pronounce his name 3 times a curse falls on you.

But fans say Tom Holland is flawless, you heard his curly hair is insured for 10,000 dollars, his favorite movie is “Spider-man Homecoming”, duh, and very soon, “far from home”. One time he met Robert Downey Jr. in his own village and he started hyperventilating, and once he threw a fan's phone on the floor and she said it was awesome.

"Please don't tell me you're going to his birthday party." You complain, because you can't help it.

"Would that bother you that much, darling?" Tom smiles, tilting his head back so that his tender smile fits perfectly with his tender face. “Then of course I will go. Also, your grandfather still has the hope his granddaughter would get a man like me.”

"Ew. Why would my dear grandfather want me to be with someone who enjoys keeping a frog in his mouth?" You ask, earning yourself an Oscar for best actress with the innocence you exude and the seriousness you manage to put on your face, even when Tom's eyes narrow from the attack you just launched, while, enjoying the show, his friend and his younger brother laughs, shaking heads with a familiar expression on their faces because of the familiar discussion between you and him that happens, every two or three days. "Seriously, Tom, give the poor Henry a break."

"Henry?" Tom asks with real confusion, his accent thick, while the other male voices ask it in a collective whisper too.

"I named your frog Henry, hope it doesn't bother you." And you laugh, victorious to feel how Tom exhales the air through his nose.

“Seriously, (y/n), when will you confess that you are in love with me? You don't have to be so shy, darling.” Tom laughs too, using his finger to tap your nose, because he knows perfectly well that you don't like that, just as you don't like being called darling anymore. “Ray is a wise man, you should listen to your grandfather."

"Yes, if you like skinny ones."

"I'm not skinny. I have the perfect body.” Tom defends himself.

"For now, but in a couple of years you will named your big belly as your dad does after drinking with mine." You laugh like a little girl because you love Dom, because he's warm and funny, because he loves his wife and children, and because of how funny he is when he and your dad have had too much alcohol, like the time they started a cartwheel contest in the middle of the street. "Who's there? It's Dom Junior.”

"Shut up! My dad is still sexy!” A heavy silence falls over the small place as everyone looks at Tom with furrowed brows and true confusion, but that's when he realizes the choice of words he used to refer to his dad. "That's not what I meant!"

You raise your hands in a sign of peace, your gaze avoiding his as you stop yourself from laughing and mocking him.

"That's so wrong, Tom." Harry says, with a certain bittersweet taste on the tip of his tongue. "Now because of you I won't be able to see dad's belly the same way."

Harry and Haz chuckle at Dom's expense.

But when the jet landed smoothly on the headlight-lit runway in the early hours of the morning, the heavy hours from the past months feels now as if they weighed the same as a feather, pain and exhausting sleepless nights disappeared in the blink of an eye, and now, there is no oceans that could make you feel far away, because in the end, you always came back home.

"Besides..." You say to finish that conversation, your backpack on your shoulder before making the victory path towards the stairs to get off the plane. "I would like a boyfriend who can grow a mustache, not like the failed attempt on your face. Thank you very much."

"Hey!" Tom frowns as you pass him by, and his voice rises even higher than it already is. "My doctor says it's just a hormone problem."

"Damn, bro..." Harry laughs as he puts an arm around Tom's shoulder, giving him a brotherly hug before walking out to the car waiting outside. “(Y/n) will be hard to catch, you know? But try it, maybe you will make it in this century."

Harry laughs, and then, walks out of the plane.

"What does that mean?" Tom asks Harrison, who is still waiting by his side.

"I think he meant that you are in love with (y/n), but you haven't noticed it yet."

Harrison chuckles, but after patting Tom on the back, he rushes to place a hand on his best friend's shoulder to stop him.

“Hey, mate… you, uh…” Tom's eyes soften, almost to the point where his brown eyes resembled the gaze of a little 5-year-old boy, sad, and lost. “You haven't told anyone why we came back, right?”

“Of course not.” Harrison says, and his gaze smiles just like his lips. “Don’t worry about anything, okay? We are home, you are home. You can take the time you need to rest.”

Tom nods, unsure, but tries to be strong as they both get off the plane. 

The gray autumn clouds hang with invisible strings in the sky as Tom Holland, actor, handsome, wealthy, and the loneliest person in the world, releases a deep breath that is lost among the sounds of the world, because his world is no longer sparkling or velvety thanks to the cameras or a red carpet, and while his new movie is a box office hit that never in his best dreams he would have imagined, something wasn't right for him.

That’s why he is back home.

The car ride is silent as some sleep, except you and Tom, because your eyes seem to recognize the streets you grew up in, because your hearts recognize your home. But for Tom, he recalls tilting his body to the left and a camera captured his best actor pose a week ago, but since then, his body has felt null, as if floating in the air and no longer responding to his orders. He was crystal clear, but a few people seemed to see clearly through him. Tom tries to convince himself that the tickling in his hands is his body's response to tiredness and not his anxiety, because he suffers it too, but he feels that something is eating his soul.

"Are you okay, Tom?"

Among a sea of ​​people, Tom Holland has always pretended to be an interesting person, but now, he takes a deep breath and looks at you, nervous, lost in the middle of that huge world, but you, looking back at him gives him peace, because he doesn’t feel alone anymore. 

What did you think? That someone is interested in knowing if you are really okay? Of course they care, right?

“Of course, darling.” Tom smiles, as if in a snap of fingers, everything is fine.

But there, he catches a movement of yours.

You tilt your head to the side, like his beloved Tessa when she is curious about something, but he doesn't say it out loud because you would take it the wrong way, but the movement in slow motion worthy of a Hollywood scene and the serenity of your gaze makes Tom hold his breath, that breath that previously didn't fit his chest with so many problems that he carried inside.

But suddenly he can breathe again, finally.

“Okay.”

The minutes pass until the car stops on a street that you two recognize perfectly. When everyone is out, the car leaves, but because your favorite boys are about to leave, too, you hug everyone as the promise to celebrate Harrison's birthday next week hangs in the air. You love them so much, because they are beautiful people who helped you to save yourself from the storms of doubts and fears, each of them in their own charming way, and for that, you were grateful.

"My friend Danielle is coming so I would like you to meet her, Haz." You chuckle adorably before leaving, noting that Harrison's smile is as real as his desire to meet her.

"I'm looking forward to it, darling."

"Wait, why he can call you darling?" Tom says, and for a second, you see a sparkle in the brightness of his eyes, but as the door of his house opens and his beloved Tessa runs to receive him, the confusion disperses like the morning haze.

"There she is the only darling you will ever get, Thomas."

And the moment you turn around, because the door of your house opens too, you lose sight of Tom's honest smile and the question that he hides behind his sweet eyes. Was he in love with you all this time without realizing it? And what if he wanna be your boyfriend? 

Oh, right. The favor that you were going to ask God for? To get you a boyfriend, a cute one, a hot one... maybe like Tom. Weird, isn't it?

Tag list: @galaxies-of-the-heart​

#tom holland imagine #tom holland fanfic #tom holland fluff #tom holland spiderman #tom holland #tom holland x reader #tom holland x you #tom holland x y/n

[calliecat93]

So… been a while since I did one of these. Yeah, long story short 2020 just ruined my anxiety and a bunch of other things and I just couldn’t handle doing the reviews after I feel so behind during the first half of V8. Even the six-week break didn’t do anything to reignite the motivation or help the anxiety, so I decided it was best to quit and just wait for the volume to be over. Which with how emotionally draining the volume was which may have very well impaired my judgment at the time, was probably the best decision. But V8 has been over for months now and we’re awaiting V9. So it’s time to finally finish this.

I normally do one chapter per review, but since I now know all that’s coming, I’m going to do two chapters per review. That means four total reviews, then a mass V8 review, and then hopefully things go better when V9 starts. So last I left off, we got Cinder backstory, the Ace-Ops running into YJR, and Salem breaking Atlas’ shields to finally go forward with her invasion. The dark times are upon Atlas and our heroes are running out of time. So… what happens now? Well, let's find out.

Overview

I normally break down everything moment by moment, but we’re gonna keep it brief since there’s a lot to cover.

In War as Salem’s attack marches forward, all of our heroes are in a bind. RWB wants to help Atlas while May wants to return to Mantle and points out that they can’t have both. Nora is still in need of a doctor, which causes Whitley, who overheard, to call in a character that we haven’t seen in quite a while. With JYR, they were captured by the Ace-Ops, who has now been tasked to use a bomb to blow up the whale. Our heroes negotiate with Winter to allow them time to go in and rescue Oscar and causes Ren to make an unexpected discovery. Meanwhile, in the whale, Emerald overhears Oscar/Oz again pleading to Hazel to see reason, even going as far as to give him the password to the Lamp. Not for Salem, for Hazel. This causes Emerald’s doubts to become even more concerning and with Mercury leaving with Tyrian for Vacuo and Cinder focused solely on her quest for power, she is left alone to decide what she wishes to do.

In RWBY’s 100th chapter Dark, we are at the Schnee Manor where the power blows out. But when they recall that they have an emergency generator, Whitley realizes that they can use the SDC to get supplies to the Mantle refugees. Ruby and Blake go to restore the power as Ruby is still struggling to maintain her usual optimism, but they encounter a Grimm in the process. Specifically, The Hound. Meanwhile, Penny, who crash-landed in front of the Manor last episode, tries to maintain control as Watts’ virus goes into effect. During the battle, it ends with Ruby discovering The Hound. One that utterly horrifies her…

Review

Okay, there is a LOT to go over with these two chapters, So let’s break this down event by event.

Monstra

Let’s discuss our villains first since we have some pretty major developments. First, we have Hazel. We had just about everything that I had assumed before confirmed. The reason that Hazel works for Salem isn’t merely just because she claims to want a new world order. Honestly, I think that Hazel just fooled himself to justify his decision to himself. No, as he talks to Ozcar, the truth becomes crystal clear. Hazel has given up. He confronted her once, and all that happened was she kept coming back until he was too exhausted to fight anymore. She broke him. Fighting her was futile and by taking advantage of this, Salem set him on the only path that he had left: getting revenge on Ozpin. Even though he’ll reincarnate, he can still be hurt. He can still be killed. He can still suffer. It was all that Hazel had left, and it consumed him.

As much as I know that some had issues with Hazel’s backstory, losing your sibling to circumstances that weren’t really anyone’s fault but you still feel so angry that you just need to blame something is very understandable. I’ve been in that place. I think that many of us have. And to learn that he did try to fight Salem at first but in the end, gave up due to her immortality… can you imagine how many others likely went down that route? Wanting to fight Salem but when the horrible truth came out were left empty? RWBY went through it in V6 and barely recovered, so it’s easy to see where Hazel is coming from. It’s easy to see why he won’t believe Oz when he tells him what Salem’s true goal, the release of death via summoning the Gods judgment, is. Oscar takes over and reveals the password, trusting Hazel to decide for himself what to do. Not Salem, Hazel. Will it pay off? Only time will tell.

But Hazel isn’t the only one privy to this new information. Emerald overheard all of it. Whatever fears that she had were all confirmed. Mercury is dismissive, both not believing it (until Tyrian confirms it) and even if he did, points out that Hazel failed and fell into line. It’s going to take time for the assassin to change his mind. As far as he’s concerned, he’s on top of the world, or at least in the best place that he can be in. Better than when he was with Marcus at least. Emerald though? She’s been doubtful and scared since at least the end of V3, even earlier if we count the flashbacks in Beginning of the End. The only thing that has kept her around along with the fear of Salem has been her devotion to Cinder. But with how Cinder has been coldly dismissive of her thus far this volume and now knowing that she’s part of something far worse than she imagined, it looks like Emerald may be deciding that it’s not worth it anymore. The question is, will she act before it’s too late? With Mercury off to Vacuo, she’s on her own to make that choice.

The villains’ stuff is mainly setup for Chapter 9 but it’s good stuff. We’re getting everything in place for the many payoffs that we’ve been waiting a long time for. Many of us have been hoping for Emerald to defect. While IDT as many have wanted the same for Hazel, he’s certainly the nobler of his buddies and has shown signs of possible redemption, so I’ve been hoping for it. Oz and Oscar’s efforts seem to be paying off and Oscar taking over and playing a huge gamble is pure excellence. It’s both Oz trusting the boy and working in tandem with him showing how he is genuinely trying to be better and showing Oscar’s growth with his more diplomatic skills here. It failed to work on Ironwood, but perhaps this time he’ll have better luck.

JYR and the Ace-Ops

Like with the villains, their stuff is contained all within War. But boy do we have plenty to go over. With Atlas in utter chaos, to the point of all the citizens having to hide in a subway, Ironwood has decided to have Winter and her team bomb Monstra. Which makes sense… except that Oscar’s in there. Needless to say, JYR isn’t happy about that. But Harriet, Elm, and Vine remain committed to their ‘we have no feelings’ routine. Even though it’s so obvious that they’re lying through their teeth. Ren’s Semblance confirmed it, but it’s not hard to tell. Elm and especially Harriet are hiding their feelings through their anger and doubling down on following orders. Vine does try to remain reasonable, but otherwise retains his emotionless demeanor. Marrow… he just clearly doesn't want to be there anymore. He’s still trying to remain comitted to what he’s doing, but this and Chapter 9 are going to be changing that big time

And WInter? Oh Lord Winter. She wants to do the right thing but is bound to her loyalty and duty to Ironwood and Atlas, and she doesn’t know which one to follow. Her orders? Or her heart? The choice may seem like a no-brainer to us, but to Winter it’s more complicated. She feels that she owes Ironwood so much. Because of him and the military, she escaped her father and his control. I think that she does realize that this point that she’s just exchanged one puppetmaster for another, but she doesn't know how to cut the strings. We see some signs of hope, both in the last volume when she allowed Weiss and the others to escape, and here when she grants JYR’s request to go into the whale to find Oscar before the bomb arrives. She knows that if Ironwood finds out she’ll be in trouble. She remains conflicted, but it’s still a signt hat it’s not too late. It allows her (and Marrow forthat mater) to remain sympathetic while others like Harriet… well, they’re not making it easy, let’s leave it at that.

That brings us to Ren. He’s had it hard thus far, his emotional control slipping, his split-off from Nora, and everything that built up the last volume coming crashing down. He’s been pushing everyone away, but now? He can’t afford to do so. Not with Oscar in danger. When Harriet says that teammates are replaceable, he strongly disagrees. He and Jaune would absolutely know how wrong this is. They’ve never replaced Pyrrha after all. Even if one considers Oscar part of JNR, he’s never been considered the new Pyrrha. He’s just Oscar, their friend. When he finally admitted that to himself, it allowed Ren’s Semblance to evolve. Instead of simply masking emotions, he can now see them via colored flower petals. Yes dear readers, Ren is an empath.

This development is perfect/. It happened at the right time, Ren finally admitting his feelings for those that he cares about instead of internalizing them and pushing those people away as he has been with Nora. It’s a natural evolution of his powers. He can mask emotions to protect others from the Grimm, and now that he can take it off he can see beneatht he masks of others. Harriet and Elm’s rage. Vine’s uncertainty (I’m assuming anyways based on what happens later). Marrow’s sadness. Winter’s collection of so many different colored petals, reflecting the war that she is having with herself. Now that Ren is beginning to open up, he can now help others do the same. Semblances reflect the on using them, and I think this says a lot about what Ren is truly meant to be and will be in the future.

Schnee Manor

Now we get to the meat of this post. Let’s go over the events in War first. While our heroes are safe at Schnee Manor, they’re conflicted on what to do. May wants to, and by Dark does, go back to Mantle since things are just as bad there and they don’t have the military to save them. Weiss however? She wants to help Atlas. Despite everything, Atlas is still Weiss’ home and there are still family and innocent people that she wishes to save. She’s a Huntress, that’s her job. May however? Her family dismissed her when she was their son, and she made it very clear that she is in no way their daughter. Which first, that was a brilliant way to add that representation. Kdin confirmed that May was Transgender last volume, but now we have undeniable proof in the show itself and it was perfectly delivered. She also makes a good point, Mantle has no protection. The whole reason that RWBY went against Ironwood was that he chose to leave Mantle to die. At this point, it does seem like the heroes can have it both ways. It worked in the past, but not here. Not anymore. But even May admits as she leaves that at this point, there might not be anythign left to do for either city. It’s just… bleak. Even moreso than in V3.

This of course hits Ruby. Normally, her optimism and hope carry her through. It was practically what got the heroes through V6 alive and well. But now? No. Even she can’t deny how bad things have gotten. When she and Blake go to turn on the backup generator, it’s clear how conflicted she is. She wants to help everyone. She chose to send the message because it seemed like the best chance to save everyone. But the longer that she waits, the more unlikely it all seems. She’s becoming utterly overwhelmed. Honestly, with how 2020 went, I find this very relatable. You w\see all the suffering caused by COVID and the horror of the police brutality against Black people and so many other awful things we’re still in the midst of. You want to do something. You want to help everyone and want things to just be okay. But when you do, all of it weighs down on you because you simply can’t help everyone. As Klein said, you can only focus on what’s in front of you first. You feel helpless, scared, maybe even angry. But we’re only human. We can only do what we can a step at a time in whatever way we can, even if it’s just being a shoulder to lean on. It’s at least something.

This leads to something that I have practically been begging CRWBY to do for years now, have Blake comfort her. We’ve had very scarce Ruby and Blake interactions, but it’s always been pretty clear that Blake trusts Ruby and has followed her lead faithfully more or less since the team formed. I think it was very fitting for Blake to be the one who reached out to her as it calls back to when they first talked in Volume 1. Back when Ruby expressed her love of books and wanting to make the world better like the heroes that she would read about. How Blake admired her goal but also viewed it as rather childish. Considering everything with the Faunus oppression, the White Fang, and of course Adam, who could blame her? But Ruby gave her hope. Ruby got her to see that they can make the world better. That despite everything, it’s their job to protect everyone and to move forward. Ruby’s been able to push them ahead so much, and they all still need her. It’s what Ruby needed to hear and it shows how far that both girls have come since those early days at Beacon. Which since this happened in the 100th episode, was very fitting.

Now I’m not gonna say too much about The Hound here. The entire fight scene was awesome and the thing stalking through the Schnee Manor? It somehow felt more horrifying than The Apathy did in Volume 6. How do you manage that?! Whitley and Willow ultimately killing it via the armor was also pretty cool and it’s nice to see the civilian characters getting involved, showing that they don’t have to be helpless like with the ship captain and crew back in Volume 4. Then the final revelation, that The Hound was not only human but had Silver Eyes… yeah Ruby’s reaction could not be more justified. I’m gonna go into my thoughts more in the 11-12 review since Ruby goes more into her feelings there. But the revelations that this one scene caused… yeah, it’s added a whole new level of horror to not just Salem, but the Grimm as a whole. It’s kind of a bummer that The Hound was killed off and it just feels so soon, but with how so much is going on at this point… yeah I’m gonna forgive it especially since the death still leaves a lot to think about in the future.

So let’s talk Schnee family! First, Willow. I like how they handled her here. She’s an anxious mess, which makes complete sense. She has to keep forcing herself to not drink, but without that coping mechanism, she’s so anxious that she ends up running out of Weiss’ room in utter panic. Fortunately, she’s still able to get her act together enough to be of help. She uses the security cameras to warn Weiss and keep an eye on The Hound. Which also allows her to see it heading for Whitley. But instead of waiting on Weiss and since Whitley understandably doesn’t want to listen to her, she does the right thing: act like a mother and save her child. Including actually using her Glyphs to summon a Boarbutusk. Yes, Willow. In a jam-packed volume like this, it’s nice to see these bits of character development for even the minor characters and it was done well here.

Then we have Whitley. I’m gonna admit it, it feels like his change is pretty rushed, but again we have about a million other things going on. Plus I guess the worst situations can bring out the best in people. That’s certainly the case here. He over-hears RWB and May talking and decides to call Klein, who is apparently a doctor, not only a butler (the temptation to NOT make an ‘I’m a doctor, not an X’ joke after getting into Star Trek is REALLY hard XD) to treat Nora. Which Weiss’ reaction to seeing him and him not at all blaming her for being fired was just beautiful. But it’s Whitley making a decision. Not due to his father’s influence. Not to get Weiss’ attention. He did it because Nora needed help and it was simply the right thing to do. The fact that he acted independently makes Weiss so happy that she hugs him. It surprises Whitley… but you can tell that he’s happy about it.

I think that really encouraged Whitley. Jaques isn’t there anymore. There’s no one controlling his fate anymore. It doens’t matter if Whitley defies him now, Jaques can’t do a thing about it. It’s Whitley who realizes that they have the resources and ability to send supplies and help to Mantle. It’s him who goes to his father’s office to get the process underway. Even when The Hound comes in, he still makes sure to give the authorization before making a run for it. With the fear of his father gone and Weiss showing more support, Whitley is showing that he’s not a bad person. He was very much like his sister was; someone trapped and forced to succumb to the toxic influences to survive. He didn’t have the support that Weiss did, nor the skills that either of his sisters had that let them escape. But he’s taking those steps now. He has an attitude still, but he’s kind of where Volume 1-3 Wess was; a major brat but one very much on their way to improving. If Whitey ends up taking over whatever remains of the SDC or outright remakes it, I think that he’ll be a fine leader while his sisters continue as Huntresses.

Finally, we come to Penny. I should probably talk about Nora as well, but since Chapter 11 is when she expresses how she feels ike how Ruby does, I’m going to hold off until then As far as Penny goes… God, I… it just hurts. Knowing how this ultimately will end only makes it more painful to go back through. But just as Chapter 5 made it look like Penny would finally be allowed to choose for herself, Watts ruins all of it. This is a girl who is utterly trapped. Ironwood bound her down by isolating her and then forcing the protection of a whole city on her. Pietro, while well-meaning, was over-protective and allowing that to keep Penny held by her strings. He let go… and look at how it ended. The Maiden Powers, while something that Penny accepted, now has her targeted on all sides and she can’t escape them while bound tot he responsibilities that come with it. Now we have Watts’ virus and despite her best efforts, she can’t stop it.

It’s just… heart-wrenching. Especially when Nora wakes up and calms her down by reminding her that whatever is trying to take over is only a part of her, not the whole being. It works… for a few moments. But in the end, all that Penny can do is succumb. This girl truly has no control over anything. Not over her own life. Not over the abilities that she possesses. And now not even over her own mind and body. She keeps having her strings yanked back and forth, wanting to just snap them off but all her limbs are held in place so she can’t. Watching her act utterly robotic, blankly describing how she will open the Vault then self-terminate… it’s just so wrong. Not to mention her coming dangerously close to being carted off to Salem with only Ruby managing a Silver Eyes blast saving her. It was hard to watch back when these premiered but after the finale? It’s just… it’s just so cruel.

Both of these chapters were excellent. War is mainly a setup chapter and ho boy the event that it sets up for… Chapter 9 is gonna be fun to talk about! But it also had plenty of pay-offs, especially for Ren and great moments like May’s scene, Salem conducting the Grimm, and it just captures the bleakness yet determination of our heroes perfectly. Then Dark… boy is that chapter title appropriate. Again great moments like the Ruby and Blake talk, the entire fight sequence, and probably the most horrifying revelation thus far. There’s some minor stuff like the jailbreak as well that made RWBY’s 100th chapter, as well as the chapter to kick off the return after the six-week hiatus, a thrill to watch. That's not even going into Alex Abraham's spectacular score, especially when the big reveal/death of The Hound happens. Just... it's just perfect. It can feel like there’s just so much going on that it gets hard to keep up with at times… but to be fair, that’s how our heroes feel as well, so I supposed that’s appropriate.

Chapter Stats

War

Favorite Character: Lie Ren

Favorite Scene: Ren unlocking his emotion-reading power

Least Favorite Scene: RWB sipping tea. It’s not a bad scene, but them just kind of standing by while the chaos is going on… it just feels a tad out of place.

Favorite Voice Actor: Kdin Jenzen (May Marigold)

Favorite Animation: Salem conducting the Grimm attack.

Rating: 8/10

Dark

Favorite Character: Ruby Rose

Favorite Scene: Ruby and Blake talk

Least Favorite Scene: I got nothing. Everything here was perfect.

Favorite Voice Actor: Arryn Zeck (Blake) and Jason Liebrecht (The Hound)

Favorite Animation: As horrifying as it was, The Hound reveal.

Rating: 10/10

Final Thoughts

When I watched these, all I could really do was stare wide-eyed. Even though I knew that this volume was going to be intense, somehow I wasn’t prepared for any of it. Certainly not for everything in these chapters. But all of it was just so freakin’ good. Does it feel emotionally draining? Yes. It was a big part of why I’m only getting to these several months later. But was it still worth watching? Absolutely. Compare Dark to the first chapter of Volume 1. RWBY has come such a long way. A lot of things both good and bad have happened in between, but it’s still going and I plan to be here until the bitter end. With quality like this, it gives me a good reason to stick around. So six more chapters/three reviews to go.

(Image Sources)

#rwby #rwby8 #rwby reviews #callie reviews

[a-forgotten-spirit]

Love Isn’t An Illusion (4)

Pairing: Todoroki x Bakugou, Todoroki x Reader x Bakugou, VERY SLOW BUILD

Summary: Training with the class, dealing with Mineta, waiting for parents and then studying with the class. 

Words: +-6500

Warnings: bad parents, the video about saving Stain, training, using reader quirk during training, Mineta, changing rooms, tight clothing for hero costume, making an illusion in the boys changing room to yell at Mineta, talking to Todoroki, crying, sad, fighting with parents, slight breakdown, excessive/destructive studying, being yelled at by parents, anxiety, depression, not sleeping.

Tagged:  @kittycatspervertedheart​ @lemorrite​ @gwendlynn​ @marleps​ @thicctati2​ @saitamastamaticsoup​ @succulent-momma​ @aurorahoneybuns​ @imjusttireddudes​ @misconceptualised​ @ochabby​ @katsukisuwus​ @gayverlinq​ @star-witchs-blog​ @fallbb123 

A/N:  I wrote this for the fans. I do not own My Hero academia or the characters, I don’t own most of the plot for this story, I had watched the show and re-written the dialogue and plot as if the reader was the main character. Everything is centred around the reader. Please comment, makes me happy. Ask if you wish to be tagged. 

Masterlist

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3

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Chapter 4

The week was over, though I hadn’t slept in days. Stain and I’s conversation running through my head like a mantra, I heard some of my other classmates had helped in areas around the city, I was happy for them. I didn’t want to go back to school, not while I was like this, coming home was nothing major. My parents ignored me still caught up about how I hadn’t gone to those interviews, not that I cared for what they thought anymore. I know I wasn’t meant to use my quirk without permission in school or out of school for that matter but as I walked through the school I made it seem like I wasn’t there. I didn’t want to talk to anyone. I had gotten messages and a few calls from Deku but not right now. 

Coming into the room I sat down making sure to not bump into anyone and listening to everyone's conversations. Both Sero and Kirishima were laughing at Bakugou, from what I had heard he was interning at ‘Best Jeaniest’s’ agency number four hero was extremely impressive. They were laughing at his hair, slicked down and neat, not the usual explosive hair he had. I thought it was cute but I did much prefer the raging hair, it suited him far more than this. 

“Stop laughing, my hair has gotten used to this and I can’t get it back the right way. Did you not hear me, I’ll kill you both” he was shaking as the words grit out of his mouth, I couldn’t imagine just how much product was in his hair right now. His hand was open and ready for one step too far from the boys and I was sure he would kill them. 

“I’d like to see you try pretty boy” Sero laughed out, mouth open wide and eyes bulging from his head. It was nice to know Bakugou did have friends, he may be very high and mighty but I couldn't imagine other people in the class saying those things and getting away with it. 

“What did you call me” and just like that his hair was back and spiky as usual. I liked his spiking hair, going in every single direction and not caring for looks. Even though he suited the style. My hand came to lightly play with my hair H/C locks smooth and silky to the touch. I don’t think I could pull off that hair but it was nice to look at, I wonder what it felt like. He seemed to take immense care of himself so I didn’t doubt his hair would be skipped. 

“Awesome, you got to face actual villains. I’m super jealous” my eyes moved from the still laughing duo and an angry screaming Bakugou to Mina. She was smiling and looking at Jirou, she helped those people in the hostage situation I had heard.

“Well, I didn’t fight. All I did was help people evacuate” I was going to speak up but my voice was caught. She shouldn’t belittle her internship, it was a lot to even do that. When you’re in such a situation, you do what you have too even if it is only escorting people to safety. “And provide logistical support” it was still more than some, she should be proud. Her voice was quiet and she was playing with her earphone jack, twirling it around her finger. 

“Still sounds like so much fun” Mina was leaning over the table as she called this fact out. She was always so happy and upbeat. I wondered what that felt like, to be so excited for like and things. Sure I was excited to be a hero but with that conversation still running through my mind, it was still a lot to take on. 

“I spent the whole time training and cleaning the ship deck,” Tsu thought out loud, her finger placed against her chin as the two other girls listened in. “Oh there was this one day we caught a bunch of drug smugglers,” she said it so calmly that I almost laughed. The two girls seemed to freeze, mouths open and shocked looks. “What about you Ochako, how was your week” when I turned to see Uraraka tense and looking ready to fight I too stopped in my tracks. 

“I’d say it was very enlightening” her voice was so cold and I swear to whoever could hear me she had this menacing purple glow around her. She was in a fighting stance then began to punch the air. She must’ve had a very good week if she was so in the zone on a Monday morning. 

“I think she found her fighting spirit” Tsu croaked out. I couldn’t agree more, she looked so ready and I wished I could have seen her train. Maybe joined in, not to say my training wasn’t enough. It was more than enough, Snipe and I bonded and got to know each other. I hoped he would still like me later on down the track for more internships. 

“Yeah, that battle hero must have been something else” I had to agree with that statement. He seemed nice enough even though Gunhead was a big guy and the name suggested a powerhouse. I had spoken to him and he seemed kind and compassionate, just what Uraraka needed. 

“After one week she’s like a totally different person” Kaminari pointed put hands out on the table and looking to be leaning away from where the girl was punching the air, the aura still moving around her. She wasn’t different, just more focused I thought. 

“Different. Don’t be fooled Kaminari” Mineta waved his finger back and forth in front of them but then, his eyes widened and he licked his lips a scowl coming to face “All women are demons at heart they just hide their true personalities behind pretty faces” he whispered out. His teeth were chattering and he was shaking?

“What did Mount Lady do to you” Kaminari questioned, gripping the smaller boys arms in a firm grip bringing him back to reality “Everyone at my internship loved me. It was kinda great” I enjoyed my internship even with all the inconveniences and the little mishap partway through the week. “Now if you wanna talk about the ones who changed was those three” Kaminari pointed to Iida, Midoriya and Todoroki conversing at the back of the room “and Y/N” 

“Oh yeah the Hero Killer, did you guys see the video that kept getting taken down. Y/N saved him” Sero pointed out, Bakugou having a tight grip on the boys collar his other hand occupied with Kirishima. 

“I’m glad you guys and Y/N made it back alive. Seriously” Kirishima sighed out, he looked so calm even though Bakugou had him by the collar though he didn’t seem to be short of breath so he wasn’t choking him which was good. 

“I worried for you too” the soft voice of Yaoyorozu spoke out, everyone moved to the back of the classroom and I was nervous someone would bump into me at my desk, no one did. 

“It was a good thing Endeavor showed up and saved you guys. Y/N too, her quirk is super powerful. I saw that she stood between Midoriya and the Hero Killer” Sato's voice seemed to be deep but also light in a way. Strange but I liked it, it was calming. 

“So cool” Toru wiggled around, her clothes moved as she moved her hands. Her voice sounded like she was interested and seemingly up to date on the topic. It was hard to gauge an emotion or expression with no face to look at. “Just what I’d expect from the number two hero” even though he had done nothing and it was all a cover-up, not that they could hear me. 

Todoroki’s eyes fell just as his head did “Yeah, that’s right” he wasn’t very good at lying, he looked uncomfortable and on edge. He had to learn how to lie properly, no one batted an eye but I could see the truth. My heart fluttered knowing I could see the difference. “He saved us” no he didn’t but, just something they had to let go. I got videoed and we couldn’t lie about that. Plus that mysterious video someone taped and posted. 

“Did you guys hear the news about the Hero Killer” my ears perked and my eyes left the dual coloured ones of Todoroki and turned to Ojiro instantly. What was he talking about, what news? Had he broken out? “Everyone has been saying he’s somehow connected to the league of villains” I froze, he couldn’t be right? He seemed far to prideful to work with them. He was on a mission, he went on about ridding the world of fake heroes, he wouldn’t associate with them but then again the Nomu were there at the same time. “Can you imagine how frightening it would have been if that creep was there when they attacked the USJ” I didn’t want to think about it if I was honest. I didn’t like thinking about that day. Though he only went after heroes, I don’t think he would have done much damage to us more so the teachers. 

“He’s scary, yeah but, did you see him in that weird video” again the video was brought up. I hated that video, it showed me helping him. My ear to his chest and then as I tried to help him. I had watched it so many times, every time it came up I watched it at least five times. Not that the real thing wasn’t constantly playing on a loop in my head. “It’s all over the internet. Stains’ a pretty evil villain but super tenacious, he’s almost kinda cool don’t you guys think” Kaminari pointed out. No, no I didn’t think that at all. He was crazy, totally and utterly bonkers. Mnirodriya called his name and it seemed to snap him back “Oh dude” his mouth was covered as he looked to Iida. 

“No, it’s fine. He is quite a tenacious villain. I understand why people might think he was cool but, instead of helping the world his views lead him to cold-blooded murder. No matter his motive killing cannot be condoned” Iida was right, it doesn’t matter your views or thoughts on anything you can’t kill people and everything will be fine. That’s not how the world works nor should it would like that at all. “To keep anyone else from suffering like me. Well” his arm was up straight and his voice rose to shout the next words “I promise, I will strive to be the perfect hero” I was glad he was getting back to his normal self again. He looked up to his brother so much, so many people did. 

“Speaking of recent events. Where’s Y/N she’s usually here before most people” Kaminari voiced and then looked around as did everyone. I sighed and let the illusion fall, all eyes turned to me instantly. “Wait have you been there the whole time” he shouted. 

“Sorry” I whispered and looked down scratching the back of my head, “Said recent events were quite a lot and it’s taken some time to” I paused and moved my hands around “Accept them” I saw a few nods. 

“You were in the middle of the city fight, weren’t you. I saw the videos of you taking down the Nomus’” Jirou turned and smiled. I nodded slowly and then came the yelling. Mina hadn’t seen the videos and was yelling that she was quite jealous of my activities. 

“Yeah, I was Snipe’s sidekick for a week. I told all the heroes that wanted me. I wanted to be treated like a hero not a tool for a week” again more yelling and questioning. Most said they thought I was kidding when I left the first time. I couldn’t blame them. “I trained and went on patrol. Even keeping a villain alive, it was a long week” I closed my eyes and smiled. No one other than the three boys at the back of the room knew I had, had a personal conversation with the said villain. I wanted to keep it that way. 

“Well now everyone. Class is about to begin” Iida shouted and I mouthed a thank you, I was met with a firm nod. I didn’t want to talk about it, it was quite a lot to deal with especially alone. I would manage. Everyone made their way to their respected seats quickly still quietly chatting away. Though Iida continued to shout. 

We were asked to change into our hero costumes and I was so excited. Sure some had seen it but I loved the new look. The iridescent colours and smoke looking mask. I loved it all. All Might was teaching us today and I smiled walking out of the changing room. I got a few looks and I walked down to the training area, my hips swaying and a smile on my face. 

“I am here” All Might shout loud and clear for everyone to hear, his hands on his hips. I hoped that one day I could shout something like that and everyone wouldn’t be scared. Everyone would know I was there to help. “I hope you are ready to return to lessons. Today it’s hero basic training, it feels like I haven’t seen you in a while” he wasn’t wrong it had been quite some time. A week at least though I had spoken to him once when I was dropping off something at the end of my internship. “Welcome back. Now listen carefully to what’s in store, we are going to be conducting a little race. Taking everything you’ve learned from your internships and applying it to this rescue training” he explained. Rescue training I admit was important but I didn’t like it at all. I wasn’t good with words and people annoyed me quite a bit but it was part of being a hero. 

“If it’s rescue training shouldn’t we be at the USJ instead” Iida yelled hand straight in the air. He still had bandages on and the memory that he might have permanent damage ran through my mind. He was always so confident and pointed out things, I had to thank him some time for talking so much that the teachers didn’t pick on me. 

“That facility specialises in disasters. As I said earlier this is a race” the way he spoke those last few words, head tilted down and smile wide I got nervous. Were we racing him because if so, I was going to quite enjoy making myself invisible and running away? “So prepare, you are about to step inside field gamma. Inside is an area full of factories, an intricate labyrinth. Good luck finding your way around. You’ll be competing in groups of five, each group starts on the outskirts of the model city. I’ll send out a distress signal and you do what you must to come to save me. Whoever finds me first, wins. But try to keep the property damage to a bare minimum please” I laughed lightly as his eyes changed from looking at all of us to only looking at Bakugou who was now looking away a scowl etched on his face. His quirk was strong, very strong but his quirk was also destructive which was a problem.

“Tch, why are you pointing at me?” Bakugous’ voice was low and croaky. He was offended by the poor thing. He was looking away not even bothering to make eye contact as I smiled laughing silently. I didn’t want to be on the receiving end of his anger. 

“Alright first group get to your places” and then we were off. Splitting up. Deku, Sero, Mina, Iida and Ojiro. The rest of us were moved in front of a TV screen where we could watch the playthrough. I had to learn everyone's attacks and weaknesses...for future reference of course. 

Everyone began to talk about who they believed was going to get to All Might first. Sero was at an advantage of simply being able to go over the buildings. Mina couldn’t destroy a lot, Midoriya I wasn’t too sure about. Ojiro could jump around and Iida was fast so they all had fast quirks. This would be something very interesting to watch. 

I ignored what everyone was saying. I needed to pay attention, I had to watch them closely in case they made us do it again and we had to fight them myself. I needed to watch them. Once it began Sero was the first to fly off, just like I predicted above everything. Then Mina skidded along the top of the buildings, she was fast. Ojiro on his tail and then Iida running along the ground. This was going to be a race of speed not so much anything else. Then out of nowhere came Midoriya, quick and jumping around on top of everyone. He looked like Bakugou and bit and from the angered look on his face he knew it too. Then he fell. The match was over quickly, Sero won just like I said. He knew his quirk too well and the fact he could easily maneuver through the place was definitely on his side. This was important to remember all their strengths. 

I was in the last group. I was up against Bakugou, Todoroki, Uraraka and Tsu. We were on the outskirts and I smirked. This would be easy, when we were allowed to go I watched as everyone began to quickly run off to get to All Might. I looked at the Camera and waved, then sent out an illusion, Cameras could only see the illusion. 

“Where did All Might go” I was running along a bridge to his spot, quick and fast. “Dammit Y/N” I could hear Bakugou yell then more explosions. The rules never stated I couldn’t use my quirk to confuse them. I was running full speed as I ran towards All Might who was smiling at me. 

Jumping down I let the illusion fade and down I was in front of him as the others landed and I got the sash. “Your quirk is so good” Uraraka looked down painfully her arms swinging by her sides as she sighed. “I thought I had a chance” 

“Sorry” I called out and leaned to one side. I could see the angered face of Bakugou as I smiled at him, he huffed and I shrugged. “I like to win” was the last thing I said as the class was over. I let everyone walk along another bridge with me so they didn’t have to walk the whole way to the entrance.

Jumping off I was met with congratulations, soon after we were sent to the changing rooms. I stretched as I walked, my hips swaying. An unfortunate side effect of wearing a skintight suit. I sighed out bringing my arms down and rolling my neck. I had gotten complimented on my new outfit and I flushed instantly. Sure I expected someone to notice but the way Toru went on about how pretty it was and how good I looked, then Mina and Tsu added in their thoughts and then it was all the girls. I couldn’t help but blush. 

In the changing rooms, I was getting undressed when I saw all the girls crowd around a little hole. I tilted my head walking over as I pulled my skirt up to my legs not having put my shirt on. I watched as Jirous’ earphone jack went straight through the hole. I could hear Mineta talk about what he wanted to see and I grimaced. I was guessing Jirou hit something at the scream we all heard. 

“Thanks, Kyoka” Toru spat out. I was so disgusted that the little pervert would try something like that. I could hear Iida going off at him and I didn’t think it was enough, he shouldn’t be in this course if this is how he acted. Jirou had her hands around her body as if to somehow cover herself. 

“Despicable, we will close up this hole immediately” Yaoyarozu huffed out, she had a very angry look on her face and I was sure my face mirrored hers. I was pissed, how low did he have to be to try something like that. 

“I’ll have it closed, for now, you can get changed Jirou. He can’t see in” I was met with a smile and then used an illusion to block the hole. “Just give me a moment” I whispered and then heard a scream as an illusion came into the boys' locker room, I could see if I wanted to but instead I only created the illusion. 

“You are honestly disgusting” I looked to Mineta, the illusion was clothed, I made sure to put that in as I looked down at the boy who was still standing in front of the hole. “If you ever try something like that again, I will personally make sure you know the full extent of my quirk” with those words the illusion faded. 

“Good one. Can you see through it” Uraraka asked and I flushed immediately as I moved to place on my shirt. I wasn’t looking at any of them and I couldn’t blame her for asking. 

“If I think hard enough yes. But an illusion isn’t me so no I didn’t see anything though I would have liked to do a bit more damage than yelling if I'm honest” I smiled and heard a group of laughter as I buttoned up my shirt before tucking it into my skirt. The skirt was shorter then I would have liked but that was a price I had to pay by not trying it on before I bought it. It was of a decent length and no one could see anything but paranoia was a key factor.  

-

Soon it was the end of the day and I was off on my way home. It was afternoon as I walked out of the main building and looked at my phone seeing a message. “Picking you up, wait” that was the only thing my mother had written. I was going to tell her not to worry but I knew it would just lead to drama and most likely another fight. Moving to a side bench I sat down and then waited. I continued to wait and wait and wait. An hour and a half later I was now staring at the parking lot waiting for my mother to arrive. 

“Y/N” I heard and turned and saw Todoroki standing behind me, book bag in hand and staring at me confused. I looked to Todoroki trying to see any emotion “Why are you still here, school ended hours ago” he commented. I could ask him the same thing. 

“Oh, well, you see” I stuttered, should I lie. Should I say I'm in an after school group, no he might ask which one. He could see my hesitance and my words fell “My mother told me to wait” I whispered and looked down to my phone. All the messages were delivered but none had been replied too. “I’m sure she’s just caught up with something” even though I could hear the lie in my tone. 

He heard it too as I nodded and looked back to my phone “Do you want me to wait with you” I felt like my heart stop. He was so nice, yet so quiet. I had seen him lose his cool though, at the hospital. I moved to meet his eyes “I’m happy too” he spoke as I looked down again.

I considered it, it was lonely and I needed to make friends. What was I thinking, I softly shook my head “No” I breathed out, licking my lips, shaking my head as I fakely smiled “No, it’s ok. You go home” I tried to smile again but it was small and didn’t reach my eyes. 

“Are you ok?” he asked and I tilted my head confused “You’re crying” I paused my hand coming to my eyes, I was indeed crying. Tears fell down my face as he moved to sit next to me. I quickly wiped my eyes. 

This was so embarrassing “I’m so sorry” I whispered trying to desperately stop crying in front of him. This was extremely awkward and my eyes hurt a little after as I rubbed them harshly. “It’s just been a long week is all” I smiled. 

“There’s no need to apologise. It’s ok to cry” no it wasn’t, it was not ok to cry especially in front of a classmate you’ve had one conversation with. I was so embarrassed I could feel my hands shake, I put them in my lap so he wouldn’t see. “You don’t have a good relationship with your parents do you” I looked at him quickly, he had a face as he understood and I sighed out and nodded. “I don’t either” he was always so honest not thinking twice about his words “I saw how your mother treated you after the festival” I nodded slowly. 

“Yeah” I whispered dismissively “She’s just got a lot on and is always busy” I rubbed my shoulder subconsciously “She doesn’t mean it, I don’t think” my fingers dug into my skin as I nodded and tried to hold back my tears “She’s just” I paused and then let the air leave my lungs. “Her”. 

“My dad isn’t the best” he admitted and I nodded agreeing. We spoke for a while, just talking and getting to know each other. It was fun to just talk to Todoroki. I found out he likes Cold Soba and wants to be the top hero to throw it in his dad's face. 

“You should head off, it’s getting dark and I don’t want you going home when it is dark. My mother will be here soon, I'm sure of it” a little bit more persuading and he was off walking out of the school. Teachers left as I sat there and waited. 

It was dark now and I was running low on battery as I tried to pass the time. I wasn’t worried as I was still on school grounds though I was getting angrier by the second now that most of the parking lot was empty. Then after almost four hours of waiting her car shows up, getting into the car I notice new nails and dyed hair. 

“Did you go to the salon?” I asked as she began to drive off. No, I just hadn’t been paying attention right? I looked back seeing bags in the back seat, she just grabbed a few things earlier today on her break. Yeah, she wouldn’t make me wait four hours for no reason. 

“Yes and” she commented brushing her hair behind her ear. We made it out of the parking lot as I was trying to reel in my anger, I could feel it rolling off me in waves. I was about two seconds away from losing my mind. 

“So you made me wait at school for four extra hours, when I could've gotten home by myself, to what” I began throwing my arms around but making sure to not go on her side. I may be angry but I didn’t want her to crash. “Piss me off. Why would you make me wait if I could’ve just gone home” my voice was loud and I was yelling. 

This started an argument, both of us yelling and her making excuse after excuse for no good reason. “I had shit to do Y/N” that didn’t excuse it. I hadn’t asked her to pick me up. I was fuming, my eye twitching “Besides I’m doing something nice for you, be grateful” she snapped her hair beginning to move. 

“Grateful” I whispered “Grateful” I screamed, we were at a red light as she turned to me “Be grateful for having to wait four hours. My teachers and peers are looking at me in pity. Be grateful for you not talking to me for a week, what else should I be grateful for” I yelled my hands rising above my head “Please enlighten me” I finished and her hair was now moving around in the air, she was pissed but by god, I was about ready to pull the car onto the other side of the road. She turned to the road ignoring me “Wow would you look at that” I commented.

The rest of the drive was silent, as soon as the car stopped I grabbed my things opening the door and then slamming it harshly a loud bang is heard and yell from my mother. I opened the front door and my dad was angry already. How amazing. 

“Where have you been?” he shouted and came to stand in front of me, chest puffed and nose flaring “I have been waiting for hours. No message, no call. Who were you with” I was about to talk when he stomped his foot “Tell me this second”

I was past my caring limit, past angry and past hysteria. I was so livid “Your wife made me wait at school for four hours while she went out shopping. If you were so worried, message me yourself for a change” as she walked in the door bags in hand I growled as she too began to scream at me. “Enough” I screamed and shook the house. My quirk running into my voice, both stilled. “Enough. I’m over this, I have had an extremely long week and I don’t want to deal with the two of you right now” with those words I stormed to my room. 

Putting up a sound barrier, my quirk did work wonders sometimes. I screamed. I screamed and screamed and screamed. Placing myself into an endless box, I flipped and broke things that came to mind. When I was a little calmer I let the box fade as I sighed out. My room was fine, no damage done. I was livid, I was over this house. Over my parents caring only for themselves. I couldn’t bear it. I had to calm down. I had to be calm. I sighed and then got changed into something more comfortable. 

Falling onto my bed with a huff I was glad I had locked the door as I was not in the least bit presentable at this given moment, hair a mess and only wearing a jumper and underwear with socks. I hadn’t studied at all today, lifting myself from the bed I moved to my desk getting my books and pens ready. 

I had muted the class group chat but when I got a notification on it I knew someone had said my name. Putting in the thumbprint I moved to look at the message. It wasn’t just me, it was ‘@everyone’ Kaminari was asking for help. Within seconds he had gotten a few replies. I was the top student in the class, something I had to keep. 

Putting on some light music I hummed along while I studied. Pages upon pages as I sat at my desk, the music changing and shuffling. I made sure to put on the ‘Calm’ list when studying. Mellow music with calm beats and slow lyrics. I loved it, it helped to stay focused. I skipped dinner, something I had been doing the last few days. When I considered myself done it was well past midnight and I knew I had to awaken in only a few hours. I had been overworking myself the past few days both physically and mentally. 

Getting up from my desk I stretched my back and then turned off the light. Heading to bed for at least a few hours. This routine went on for a while, I was getting more and more tired. I was showing up on time but later and later until I was walking in with Aizawa. I was using all my effort to participate and pay attention in class. I had helped Todoroki and Midoriya study a few times, Kirishima, Sero and Kaminari tagging along then it turned into a half a class thing. 

“Y/N you have such neat notes” Kaminari complimented and with hooded and under shaded eyes I thanked him. I helped whoever needed it, I began talking to them more often and even Bakugou had tagged along. I ended up helping him a few times even though I played it off as he was helping me for the others. 

“How does someone have the mental capacity to take these kinda notes in class and then study” Mina called out throwing her arms in the air and her head falling back with a cry. I was sitting next to Bakugou and Todoroki, I should say in the middle of them when I received a call. 

I didn’t even look at the caller as I tiredly answered “Hello” it was silent for a few moments as I yawned and held the bridge of my nose. I could see everyone being quiet as I waited for a reply. 

“Where are you” came a scream and I could see I was getting a few stares. With a confused glance and pulling the phone from my ear, I looked at the caller ID and saw it was my mother. I nodded slowly and put it back. “Answer me” she screamed. 

“I am at a study group with people from my class” I answered calmly, I didn’t have the energy to deal with her today. I hadn’t slept in days and my anxiety was through the roof at this point. “I told you I was going, you said and I quote ‘I couldn’t care less’” I didn’t care who could hear I was tired and on my last brain cells of living. 

“Don’t expect me to pick you up” she shouted, it sounded like she was in the car. I put my hand up to the class and stood, stumbling over a little way away from the table to have this conversation somewhat private. 

“I didn’t” I answered and leaned against a wall, not quite able to hold myself up at this given point of time. I sighed out and rolled my eyes as the yelling continued. 

“What time will you be home” as I was about to answer I heard a beep “Idiot” so she was driving, I rubbed my eyes just trying to keep them open. “Answer me” another scream and I pulled the phone away from my ear for a moment to not go deaf. 

“When it’s over, I have keys. I always have keys” I answered softly. If she even cared a little she would be able to hear just how tired I was and how much I wanted this conversation to end. More screaming. “I need to go” then all went silent. 

“Whatever. You know what, whatever. Do as you wish, as per usual” then she hung up. I pulled the phone away looking at the call symbol disappear and sighed. I ran my fingers through my hair. It was only just after dinner, I could go home but I wasn’t in the mood to deal with her but I was so tired. I had to study, I sighed, I had to study. 

Now I was angry, walking over I threw my phone on the table with a loud bang, not caring for the device at all as I grabbed my book and began to write. I was writing so fast, I was so mad, so burnt out. I was writing science formulas and going down the page as I changed colours and wrote my notes as I usually did. 

“Are you ok?” Kirishima asked slowly and I looked up, eyes lidded, the bags beneath my eyes felt like they were pulling my eyes down. I nodded with pursed lips “You don’t look ok” he added and I heard a few agree. 

“Just a normal day, nothing to worry about” I whispered and I could see the worried faces begin to blossom. I didn’t like the attention and swallowed, I looked down and saw all my calculations and noticed I had done an entire science calculation in anger. A hard one too. Dropping my pencil I rubbed my eyes. 

“When was the last time you slept?” Sero asked his smile fading but teeth still showing. Now everyone seemed interested in this question, I too was interested in the answer. 

I thought about it “Monday” I said questioningly “I think I slept on Monday. What day is it” I asked and looked down, it was Thursday. “Saturday I had an hour, I think I had about half an hour Monday” I answered and nodded “Or was that the Saturday study breaks” I whispered and shrugged “I don’t know” I answered. 

“That’s not good” Bakugou spoke in a calm voice. I turned to him and nodded slowly. My eyes closed for a second and I shook my head to bring myself back. I could hear people saying I should go home and sleep, eat something. “You haven’t been eating either” Bakugou pointed out. 

“I have to study” I swallowed and all conversations died down. I shook my head “I can’t fall behind” I whispered and I felt the air get sad. I began to highlight and write and the conversation came back into the room. Laughter and other things. I sat in between Bakugou and Todoroki just doing my work, helping them a few times before returning. It was well into the night when we all departed. I was packing up my things as I almost fell over being caught by packing up Bakugou. “Sorry” I whispered. 

I watched as people watched me stumble out of the room and then down the hall. I accidentally bumped into Aizawa who was holding papers and almost fell over again “Y/N” he asked and I was off again down the hall.

The next few days began the same until Monday morning when the class ended. I was having trouble staying awake through the whole class but I had to pay attention to every single second. I didn’t have time to fail. I needed to do this. I needed to pass, I needed to do well. I could only sleep on the day of the exam. 

“Alright, that’s it for today, you only have one more week before the exam” I was smiling ear to ear, I could sleep. One week, I had to sleep. I had to be fully rested for the exam, I was so tired. “I’m sure you’re all studying constantly, right?” I nodded. Yes, yes I was. “Don’t forget to keep training, the written exam is only one element” no sleep for me then. I had been training but not enough, I had learned skills but I needed to put them into action. I had to do well, there was not an option for failure. “There’s also the practical portion to worry about. Good luck” and with those words the door was closed and my anxiety shot through the roof.

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Chapter 5

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