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tallqueennancy · 1 year

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🕯️ manifesting Eddie supporting Buck during his physical recovery just like Buck supported Eddie during his mental recovery 🕯️

#911 fox #buddie #evan buckley #eddie diaz #911 6x12 #911 season 6 #911 season 6b #otp: two cut lines #evan buck buckley #coma!buck #e: recovery #911 spoilers

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nontimesversion · 2 months

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utilitycaster · 1 year

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I've gotten a couple replies of "and that's terrifying" on this post about the more stable members of Bells Hells, and, to be honest, hate that, so let's talk about it.

There's a couple reasons. The first that I still don't know who the fuck thought the Issylra half of the party split would be Team Levelheaded and not Team Abandonment Issues, because, well, it's the latter. The second is that there's been a near constant undercurrent from quite early in the campaign of "oh Orym...he's going to break...he's a powder keg" and while he's decidedly not a powder keg, we did get him finally breaking a bit, and suddenly everyone's like "HORRIFYING that the guy I kept claiming was uniquely angsty is now having a harder time with the party split than the other characters whose equally tragic backstories I've consistently ignored, diminished, and dismissed."

All three of the Bells Hells characters in Team Issylra have issues related to loneliness and being left behind, which is a common thread through the party, but notably, Fearne, FCG, and Chetney being more stable should not be surprising nor scary. Resilience isn't tied to whether or not you're somewhat chaotic, or have mechanically-induced loss of control, and that's what we're talking about here. The reason why Team Issylra is having a rough time of it - and specifically why Laudna and Orym are falling apart whereas Ashton is doing comparatively well - is because they've been constantly pretending things are okay. Chetney, meanwhile, genuinely does think the worst thing that happened to him fucking rules, and has the age and perspective and sheer survival instincts to pull through; FCG has, within the story, had to face some horrifying realizations about himself and so has some tools for this kind of situation; and Fearne is to be honest still learning that consequences are a thing that happens, but she has dealt with a few profound disappointments and is sitting with them - she openly admitted she's not terribly impressed by her parents.

On the other hand, I think Orym has worked through the earlier stages of grief, to be sure, but he's put a brave face on over it and tried to look at the bright side. Which isn't the worst idea, but it means when the things he's built that idea of a bright side upon - Keyleth's infallibility, his relationships within the Crown Keepers - are nowhere to be found, he doesn't have anything to take hold of. He adjusted to one devastating change by clinging to the constants, and now that many of the constants are gone too, he has no mechanism to process the change in their absence.

And this is Laudna's whole deal, right? I do in fact agree that her initial death was still the worst thing that's happened to her so far, but that doesn't mean she can't still be incredibly upset by major events. It's comforting to know you've survived worse, but it doesn't necessarily help you actually get through a slightly less terrible (but still pretty terrible) situation. She says she can't stop compartmentalizing or she'll cry - but like, she'd probably feel better if she'd just spent the second watch crying. Like Orym, Laudna's developed this idea that she can will things into being okay, and in the end, she can't. Leaning into the "Today SUCKS" attitude would, honestly, help her, and I'm hoping she does so.

Ashton meanwhile doesn't have healthy coping mechanisms, but they do have coping mechanisms that work in this situation (namely, drinking and hitting things). He also, more importantly, has no investment in pretending things are okay. Ashton thinks the world is full of utter bullshit that will fuck you over, and the point is to get through it, and sure, it's a very cynical mindset, but there's a reason why toxic positivity is, well, toxic.

As a sidebar, I also think that Ashton has, fascinatingly and despite their drunken talk with Laudna on the skyship, put their abandonment issues into perspective. Ashton is able to handle the current situation because, logically, they were teleported to a random location beyond their control and with no capacity to contact other people, so it's reasonable to assume the other half of the party is in the same position. No one abandoned anyone. To quote Ashton themself, actually, from episode 25, "Sometimes shit's just fucked up, and the only thing you can do because you didn't do anything fucking wrong, is get the fuck back up and do the exact same thing all over again knowing that there was nothing to learn." On the other hand, the fact that Milo saved Ashton makes that particular situation worse. If Ashton had been left to die in the street and a random uninvolved stranger picked him up? Then you can at least imagine the Nobodies had to leave, or couldn't pick them up for whatever reason, or even perished themselves. The fact that Milo was able to make this choice means the Nobodies also had the ability to make a choice, and the choice was to leave them behind, and that's what stings, and that's the unique loneliness, and that's why this situation isn't comparable.

So anyway, in summary, it's unsurprising the two people who have handled grief and tragedy by trying to quietly (in Orym's case) and not-so-quietly (in Laudna's) smooth it over are finding themselves completely unable to do so and barely holding together, whereas the people who allow themselves to be upset or, frankly, just go apeshit, are doing much better.

#critical role #critical role spoilers #bells hells #Ashton (and Deni$e) are honestly reminding me of the Yasha pit fight in C2 rn #like was that a healthy coping mechanism no but Yasha honestly did feel much better after it and her recovery trajectory went up from there #and ashton has the other dimension of like. he has chronic pain. it's unfair and serves no purpose. shit happens.#it's very they should invent a way out that isn't through but unfortunately they didn't so fuck it i'm smashing the wall #i mean barbarian rage as catharsis isn't a new idea by any stretch but. the thing about a reckless attack is it feels good as hell

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magnificenciablog · 3 months

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Vendo tantas meninas bonitas e magras, eu tô aqui há tanto tempo, eu me sinto uma fraude.

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voidsquidd · 2 months

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I'll get better after I get worse, I promise

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orthaed · 1 year

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My account everytime I don't waste money on binge food.

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girlbossblog444 · 1 month

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If you starve yourself and follow me, block me rn before I didn't gave you a reality check

Have fun dying an early death just for some lb lost

Btw you'll gain everything back, so good luck

Take offense idc 😘

Edit:y'all mad💀

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fasting4dayz · 4 months

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what -spo am i at?

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haredjarris · 6 months

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When people draw Francis with a defined/triangular jawline I’m like who the hell is this. Who brought that goddamn jawline here. Not me. Not my jawline not my problem that’s what I say. No way. Come pick up your jawline. Look at my perfect squishy faced boyfriend and apologise now.

#obv i take this personally after losing my jawline in the great e@ting d1sorder recovery war of ‘18 #let me have my round face blorbos #the terror #the terror amc #amc the terror #francis crozier #jared harris #body image /#eating disorder mention in tags /

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sonodette · 1 year

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Nutrirsi d’amore, per rinascere

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snail-legs · 8 months

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when this is posted I'll be one week post-op! here's part 1 of my top surgery diary of some pre op feelings!! part 2 coming when I feel good enough to finish it ^^'

#art #q #mine #comics #zines #top surgery #autobio comics #part 2 will probably be abt the first 2-4 weeks of recovery n ofc the day of the surgery itself #and maybe I'll do a part 3 when I'm 6 or 12 months healed we'll se #e

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nontimesversion · 2 months

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randilookssoblue · 5 months

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I've been thinking recently about trying to just be normal. But I was sitting just now and thought "this is so stupid" and simultaneously "what the fuck have I done to myself?" I'm trying to finish high-school, to get into college and make a fucking life for myself. All I have succeeded in doing in the past 6 months is making my mental health so much worse, ruining my eating habits, and encouraging other people to do things that would have repulsed me a year ago. What the fuck is wrong with me? I never used to excercise before this, never used to puke my meals or binge eat. I don't even know or like who I am anymore. I'm miserable and focusing on all the wrong shit. At this rate, sure I'll die thin, but I won't die old or happy or even a little successful in life. I need to separate myself from this community, the thoughts and actions I've adopted over the past half year will never leave me for better or for worse and I might even come back. For now, though, I desperately need to focus on the bigger picture in life because I'm drowning in my mental anguish and there has to be so much more to life than hating myself and the way that I act.

#recovery #anorexcya #ana e mia #ana angels🪽#skinnni #@na bvtt3rfly #pro for me not for thee #i will reach my ugw #@na buddy #ana rant #tw ana diary #ana trigger #ana bllog #🦋diary #🦋log #🦋rant #ana rambles #ana recovery #tw mia

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growingwithem · 8 months

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Because of this, Hyukjae took care of Donghae ❤️‍🩹

And Donghae was so grateful 🥹

.♡.♡.♡.

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s4r4hlynnlover · 15 days

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"Nowi i recovery"

Przepraszam za tak dziwny tytul ale od dawna chcialam o tym poprostu napisac bo dla mnie to jest bardzo wazne a wiec chodzi o to ze tutaj pojawia sie coraz wiecej osob z zewnatrz ktore maja owszem w zdecydowanej wiekszosci ogromne problemy z samoakceptacja i nie tylko ale nie o tym tylko chcialabym prosic wszystkie osoby ktore sa tutaj z powodu masowej gloryfikacji any i mii na innych portalach spolecznosciowych o tym zebyscie sie zastanowili czy warto ryzykowac wlasnym zdrowiem, zyciem towarzyskim, ocenami, dobra opinia i zrezygnowac w pewnym momencie z tego co kochacie ze wzgledu na cos co tak naprawde was zabija ale jest wstanie dac wzgledny komfort i zludne poczucie kontroli. Chce wam rowniez powiedziec ze nie zaleznie czy robicie to by uzyskac uwage czy z powodu braku akceptacji, czy checi kontroli nad czym kolwiek kazdy z was jest tak samo wazny i tak samo zasluguje na wsparcie i milosc a jezeli chcecie sie wiecej o konsekwencjach choroby i mechanizmach chorych dowiedziec polecam podcast motylki w sieci

Treści informacyjne

motylki w sieci - dama kier (moim zdaniem ten podcast jest bardzo obiektywny i autorka poprostu bardzo sie postarala i nie rozpowszechnia szkodliwych informacji)

Malawa - my anorexia story 2 - nanami chan (opowiada doglebniej o tym jak wyglada recovery w malawie) dla osob zastanawiajacych sie nad osrodkiem

Wsparcie

116 111 - telefon zaufania (jest rowniez opcja czatu zaufania)

Naprawde jako osoba co siedzi w tym od lat moge wam powiedziec ze to nie jest tego warte dbajcie o siebie i nie bojcie sie szukac pomocy

#motylki any #blogi motylkowe #ed relapse #ed recovery #pro recovery #recovery #mental heath support #mental health #ana e mia #ana recovery #mia recovery #food is good #food issues #food is love

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girlbossblog444 · 1 month

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How it feels to be locally hated by both ed and haes community

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