#but its like. man. looking back? whomst cares. | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

cat3ch1sm · 2 years

Note

requests are back therefore iiii am baaaaccckk!!!

i have decided i would like a lil sum sum both angst/hurt but obviously ending happy because i am weak without it 🤪snarky bamf girlfriend has gone missing how very dare she. she begged to leave to go shopping because she love’s watari she does but he can’t….shop bless his heart (and she enjoys nature as well cause ya know fresh air takes away sadness at least that’s what my therapist said 😌☝️) L is freaking out but not but is cause he does have feelings and is like “i regret being in a relationship” only because he’s worried to all hell. if you do like during task force don’t wanna tell you how to write cause duh but i would not mind if it’s more like a character study of L as each member interacts with him (insert tries~~ to) and help with the ongoing situation. i dunno i kinda see obviously golden retriever himbo matsuda being the one uncomfortable with the fact that L is still so stoic. would L lash out? i dunno sure. you’re probably wondering whomst would take snarky girlfriend and howst did they know about her? just a random dude and i think that’s what pisses L off its not anyone with a vendetta just some random sicko. she comes back obviously and once again you can decide that part because i did not think that far 😌😊. anywhoooooooo welcome back literally take a sabbatical if needed. with that being said take as long as you want with this request cause yes ✨tdlrrrr: girlfriend gone, L freaking out, task force struggling to help, girlfriend come back, literally cannot go anywhere ever again and tbh can’t leave L’s sight 🫡 God bless bestie soldier

🐸| hey girl queen pussy boss glad to see u in my reqs again😏

Why did he even let you leave?

L had never let you go out without someone keeping tabs on you at all times- usually him. Of course, nobody on the outside knew he was L, but it was just to be on the safe side. Regardless. You'd been gone for over five hours with no follow-up.

Hell. He knew he should have just stuck that tracking chip on your shoelace when he had the chance.

He really shouldn't have cared. There were far more important things to tend to, obviously. L was in the middle of the Kira investigation, for god's sake, working with just six other people, one of which he was almost completely sure was the internationally feared murderer himself. That was what should have been on his mind. And anyways, you were an adult. You were intelligent and resourceful and every bit as capable as he. If harm befell you, L had very little doubt that you wouldn't be able to make your way out. But no matter how much he tried to convince himself that what was going on around him was significantly more pressing, something in him just wouldn't accept that. There was an annoying nagging in the back of his mind reminding him that you still weren't back.

L really couldn't stand you leaving to begin with. What did you need to go shopping for Watari for, anyway? The man looked just fine in his professional attire, L thought. But you had insisted that Watari needed more up-to-date clothing and a wider selection of outfits in general, and L, knowing it would be useless to argue with you, had simply let you leave. But it couldn't possibly take that long to buy clothes for a man three times your age, right? Then again, L wouldn't know. He'd never even set foot in a shopping center- his trusty white shirt and blue jeans had served him just fine for years. Why had he even gotten in a relationship to begin with? If he had never met you, he wouldn't have to feel this way. That would have been much more preferable.

Oh, please. He didn't mean a word of that and it was impossible to convince himself that he did. L knew he was really starting to panic if he was thinking like this.

The members of the task force themselves also seemed to notice your absence despite them not knowing you very well. The loss of the atmosphere of arrogance and lack of sarcastic remarks was not missed by anyone- which prompted the most eager (and the most tone-deaf) member of the group, Matsuda, to ask about your extended absence.

"Hey, L- I mean, Ryuzaki?" Matsuda carefully stepped towards the detective, whose blank expression was beginning to falter. "You know, Y/N's been gone a while... do you think everything's okay?"

So even Matsuda had noticed, L realized. That didn't seem good- but he was determined to keep it together, and he definitely didn't feel like talking about it with Matsuda.

"She's fine," L replied, a little too sharply, and Matsuda backed up a bit. "That's unimportant right now. How close are we to formulating a plan to infiltrate Yotsuba directly?"

"Oh- yeah. My bad." Matsuda scurried away, leaving L to mull over your whereabouts. Assuming shopping wasn't supposed to take this long as he'd suspected, there were several possibilities. Perhaps you'd been taken was one he was a bit concerned about- you didn't look very strong at first glance, and of course most people would consider you quite attractive. But L more doubted this than didn't- you weren't an inexperienced fighter, and you were more than capable of fighting off anyone that approached you the wrong way.

Next thought- maybe there had been a situation at the shop you'd gone to? Maybe someone had burst through the door with a gun and held everyone hostage- but L didn't think that was likely, either. Japan was so strict about who could have a gun that it was almost impossible for a regular citizen to obtain one- and definitely not someone crazy enough to hold a bunch of people hostage. Third scenario.

Okay, removing all ideas of foul play- there were lots of potential reasons why you weren't back yet that didn't involve you getting kidnapped or killed. Maybe you just ran into a friend at the store and stuck around with them to catch up. Maybe traffic was just bad- it had been drizzling all day, anyway. He knew you had a penchant for things like trees and birds- perhaps you had just stopped at a nearby park or something.

Wait- what if you'd run into someone else? A new person? Someone who wasn't so... reclusive. Quirky. Reserved. Odd. L wouldn't be surprised if you had just found someone you fancied more- someone like you had tons of options, more than L cared to admit at the moment. Maybe you'd wanted to get away from him for once and accepted a date request from this other person. Maybe you'd found them fun, fascinating, attractive. Someone like that would probably be much appreciated by you when all you did was spend time with L and his... personality.

L decided to stop himself there. He was going to worry himself into a frenzy if he kept that up. No, next.

Maybe Watari's wardrobe actually did need updating- and badly, for you to be gone this long. When was the last time L had seen the elderly man out of that stately suit and hat, anyway...?

"Ryuzaki?"

L snapped out of his thoughts and slowly spun around in his chair to face Detective Yagami, who was eyeing L with a furrowed brow. "Is everything alright? You seem to be in a bit of a trance..."

"Yes, yes, I'm fine." L averted his eyes and waved his hand dismissively, turning back around before Soichiro saw his normally calm visage waver. Unfortunately, Soichiro's son stood right beside his father; L could feel Light's eyes burning into the back of his head.

"Dad's right; you seem a little off," Light added, stepping around L's chair so that he could see L's face. "We're making pretty good progress with Yotsuba, if that's what you're worried about- we've got a couple of leads-"

"That's good." L interrupted, and Light cocked his head at the detective, a little put off. "Keep it up."

Light turned around and began to wander back over to the rest of the task force, watching L's back from the corner of his eye. When he was face-to-face with his colleagues again, he brought up L's unusual demeanor, lowering his voice. "I know this might not be a great time, but have you all noticed anything a little odd about Ryuzaki today?"

Soichiro nodded in agreement. "Yes, I have... he seems a bit- dare I say- distracted." He kept his voice barely audible as to not attract the attention of the enigmatic detective just a few feet away from where the group was huddled.

"I noticed it too; it's unlike him," Aizawa added in a businesslike tone. "Although I'd rather stay on task than discuss Ryuzaki, it's honestly unsettling..."

"He must be very much so if we can tell," Light decided. "I mean, Ryuzaki obviously hides a lot under the surface- so if we can see it, something must be really bothering him."

"I know, right?" Matsuda exhaled, seeming relieved that he hadn't been the only one that had noticed L's unusual behavior. "I even went and asked him about it."

"Straight out?" Soichiro looked startled. "Matsuda, good grief."

"No, no- not straight straight out," Matsuda hurriedly amended, shaking his head wildly. "I just asked him about Y/N, and he kind of snapped at me and I came back over here," he explained quickly.

Light snapped his fingers, coming to a realization. "Of course- Y/N is what's worrying him. Have you noticed how long it's been since we've heard from her? Ryuzaki must be fretting over her whereabouts."

Soichiro turned to Light, an understanding expression on his face as he thought over this. "Right. We already know the two of them have... a relationship of sorts, so it's only natural for someone to be concerned- especially someone like Ryuzaki."

"I can't imagine why he'd be very worried about her," Aizawa scoffed. "Y/N seems more than capable to me."

"Still, he's worried. Normal human emotions!" Matsuda announced triumphantly, throwing his arms into the air.

The other three men collectively facepalmed.

Matsuda dropped his arms, puzzled. "Wha-?" Confusedly, he turned around- and was met with the startling sight of Ryuzaki's wide eyes staring right back at him.

"Agh!" Matsuda instantly whirled back around and squeezed his eyes shut in embarrassment as the other task force members glared at him, annoyed.

"Again- good grief, Matsuda," Soichiro snapped under his breath, and Matsuda dared to open his eyes a smidge to give the older man a sheepish smile.

"My bad, Chief..."

Luckily for the group, Ryuzaki didn't budge from his chair, instead having turned back around to fidget aimlessly with the mouse of his computer. Of course, the lack of reprimand for the group being off task was not lost on the men, who goggled in shock at Ryuzaki and then Matsuda, who seemed just as appalled as everyone else.

"Uh- why didn't he get mad again?" Aizawa asked, brow furrowed.

"Beats me..." Matsuda glanced one more time at Ryuzaki before turning to face the others with wide eyes. "Okay, he's totally freaking out about Y/N, right? He has to be."

"I guess that's the only conclusion," Light agreed, looking uncertain. "But if the guy running this whole operation is distracted, what are we supposed to do to help?"

"Ah, you're right- that may be a problem," Soichiro affirmed nervously. "But this is Ryuzaki- I'm really at a loss for what to do here."

The group stood in thoughtful silence for a couple of minutes, wondering how to fix this problem.

Matsuda suddenly snapped his head up. "Hey, let's cheer him up!" he suggested gleefully, making sure to keep his voice hushed this time.

The rest of the task force reacted accordingly to this idea.

"Huh?"

"What?"

"Huh?"

"Oh, come on- you heard me," Matsuda enthused, his expression brightening. "If we can make him feel better, he won't be distracted, and we can get things going again!"

"Sounds like a pipe dream," Aizawa jutted in scornfully.

"Not if we pull it off."

"And the chance of that is...?" Light prompted sarcastically before folding his arms across his chest and letting out an exasperated breath. "I really think we ought to just leave him be. Y/N will be back soon, more than likely, and he'll be just fine."

"Still," Matsuda insisted. "We're just being nice! And it's super weird seeing Ryuzaki like this, anyway... so why not?"

"And how would you suggest we go about that, Matsuda?" Soichiro queried, his tone skeptical as well.

Matsuda eyed both Yagamis curiously. "You've never cheered anybody up before when they're down? Just tell him that there's nothing to worry about- but in a lot more words than that."

"Okay, Matsuda, quick reminder that this is Ryuzaki." Aizawa arched a brow dubiously.

"Yeah, well, Ryuzaki or not, he's still a human being."

"But do we know that for sure?" Now both eyebrows were raised.

"Okay, okay." Light held up two hands, silencing the two men. "You know what, Matsuda? We'll try it, just to humor you. But if this doesn't go as planned..."

"Thanks, Light! Don't worry, it'll be fine- come on, guys!" Matsuda, apparently having no qualms at all, began strolling right towards Ryuzaki, leaving the other men no choice but to follow him.

"I hope he knows what he's doing," Soichiro murmured beneath his breath.

"With Matsuda? It's kind of a gamble," Light told his father as the group approached L, who turned around upon hearing the men behind him. Seeming a little caught off guard, L cocked his head at them, eyeing each in turn. "Is something the matter?"

Light, Soichiro, and Aizawa all awkwardly mumbled different things in unison, the general idea being that Matsuda was the one who forced them over here. Matsuda, however, paid no mind to the others and flashed a somewhat pitiful smile at L, who blinked in confusion.

"Actually- we were wondering-"

"You were wondering," Aizawa interjected sharply.

Matsuda huffed. "Okay, I was mostly wondering- but they were too- if you were doing okay?"

L continued to look confused. "Doing okay?"

"Like, uh, we were wondering if you were feeling alright. If something was wrong?" Matsuda sputtered, chuckling awkwardly after every few words, the task force behind him grimacing as L glanced towards them.

"I am alright. Thank you for asking. Now wh-"

"But are you really, though?" Matsuda cut him off abruptly, wringing his hands nervously. "I- what I mean is-"

Finally, Light, seeing that if they allowed Matsuda to go on he would say the wrong thing, interrupted Matsuda himself. "To be honest, we've noticed that your behavior has been a little out of the ordinary since Y/N left a while ago. To put it simply, we're curious as to if she is the reason for this."

Matsuda sent Light a grateful look as Light stepped back slightly with a wince. Meanwhile, L just watched the group, apparently waiting for the next person to talk.

"Of course, we don't mean to be invasive," Soichiro clarified, deciding to help the pair that had just spoken. "We'd just like to know if you need us to do anything." Aizawa, not knowing how to add on, just affirmed Soichiro's words with a firm nod.

L sighed, seeming exasperated, and the entire task force collectively cringed, hoping their words hadn't come off the wrong way.

"If you must know..." L finally spun around, his gaze not meeting anyone else's. "I am a bit concerned as to where Y/N may be right now. There's no need to walk on eggshells- you all are already aware that we have a bit of a relationship, so please, don't look so nervous."

Nobody relaxed.

"I appreciate your concern, but really, it's unnecessary," L insisted. "I'm just a little worried. Everything is fine."

"Can't be if we can tell something's wrong," Matsuda countered, and L's probing gaze instantly shot up to look at him. Matsuda faltered some before continuing on. "Well, I mean, you never show any emotions ever, so... I mean..."

L arched a brow, but his response wasn't what Matsuda expected. "Excellent deduction."

"Well, I'm sure she'll be back soon," Light chimed in, a little weirded out by the whole situation, but trying to be reassuring anyway. "Y/N certainly isn't helpless- I'm not suspecting any foul play, so I hope that's not what you're worried about."

The words sounded strange coming from Light's mouth- Ryuzaki, worried about someone? His thoughts on humanity as a whole were pretty straightforward: trust nobody, they're only "cunning monsters," so forth. But it seemed L didn't feel that way about everyone.

"I agree," Soichiro added, sounding tentative. "It's probably traffic or something similar that's keeping her. I'm sure there isn't any need to worry."

L didn't reply to either Yagami, only looking up at them with just a hint of uncertainty on his face. "Mm... do you think so?"

"To be honest, you never know with women." Aizawa shrugged flippantly, trying to lighten the mood some. "They say they'll be back in an hour and you don't see them for five, they say 'fine' when they actually want you dead, all of that. Y/N's probably still... what was she doing?... shopping or something. Wouldn't be surprised if she just wanted to 'look around' a little more- and apparently, that's not a slow process with them."

Now L actually looked lost. Meanwhile, the other task force members slowly lifted their gazes towards Aizawa, equally questioning expressions on their faces.

"Uh... thanks for the information... I guess?" Matsuda squinted at his coworker, bewildered.

Aizawa pursed his lips unapologetically. "I tried."

Matsuda blinked before turning back to L. "Okay- so why exactly are you so worried? What do you think might have happened?" He spun around to face Light. "Hey, Light, you have a girlfriend- what would you be worried about besides for foul play?"

Light's expression dulled at the mention of Misa Amane. "Can't say I'd be worried," he answered listlessly. "When she isn't with me and she's out in public, she has a couple of bodyguards with her a lot of the time."

Matsuda coughed awkwardly. "Uh, yeah, right. Uh- well, if you don't mind, Light, if Misa-Misa was my girlfriend, I'd be worried that she'd find somebody else to be with!" He laughed nervously, putting a hand behind his head. "I mean, it would just seem like she had a bunch of other, way better options for a boyfriend." He looked back down at Ryuzaki, who blinked up at Matsuda with an odd expression. "Maybe you're worried about something similar? That she ran off with a random guy or something?"

L was silent for a few seconds before responding. "...maybe. But if that were true, I'd be more worried about foul play than Y/N deciding to leave with no warning. That would be out of character."

"Huh- I guess you're right; that would be kinda weird." Matsuda stuck out his lower lip in thought.

Now Soichiro spoke up. "Forgive me if this is offensive, but... knowing you, I'd expect you had something like a tracking device on her- honesty, I'm a little bit surprised you don't."

"Yes, I know, and normally I would," L sighed. "However, I was specifically asked not to, so I refrained..."

"It's okay," Aizawa offered. "I mean, it's a lot better than you doing it anyway and her finding out later."

L nodded halfheartedly.

"If you're really concerned, Ryuzaki, you could let us go out and try to look for her," Matsuda suggested helpfully. "Especially since we're sort of way off task already..."

"A search? Now?" Light queried, eyeing Matsuda skeptically.

"Yeah? Why not? It's not like we'll be able to focus now, anyway." Matsuda shrugged casually.

"Now isn't the best time," Soichiro interjected, siding with his son as usual. "Of course, this is still the Kira investigation..."

"Actually, I'm with Matsuda on this one- for once," Aizawa cut in. "We won't be able to really do our best work if Y/N's on our minds. It'd be best if we just went out and got her already."

"Didn't we establish that Y/N is perfectly capable of handling herself?" Light countered. "She'll come back when she comes back. There's more important things at hand."

"My son is right," Soichiro affirmed. "Matsuda- please think twice before dragging us all somewhere next time..."

"But, chief- you guys agreed to help cheer up Ryuzaki so we could get back on task!" Matsuda protested. "Of course, sir, no disrespect."

"Cheer me up?" L glanced up at Matsuda questioningly.

"Yeah, this was a team decision," Aizawa challenged. "If we hadn't come over here, we would have just spent the whole time wondering about Ryuzaki."

"You could have just asked me-" L tried to cut in.

"Are my father and I the only ones capable of focusing on the task at hand?" Light demanded, his tone growing agitated and the atmosphere tense. "Why are we worrying about an issue that will just resolve itself?"

"What if- but what if it didn't?" Matsuda sputtered, a little caught off guard at the change in Light's normally cool demeanor. "There's always the risk that-"

"Again," Soichiro interrupted, his voice still calm, "Y/N can tend to herself. We've already eliminated the possibility of these 'risks.'"

The discussion quickly began to devolve into chaos, the task force members at odds and L unable to get in a single word.

"But there's still a chance-"

"Y/N can take care of herself!"

"There's nothing wrong with making sure."

"It isn't like we're gonna get anything done at this point!"

"You realize this isn't an everyday investigation, right?"

"Everyone, please-"

"You're doing nothing but drowning everybody out at this point!"

"I don't see why you're so against this idea!"

"I could say the same for you!"

"Please-"

"Hey."

Everyone stopped in their tracks, the room suddenly silent as your voice echoed through the room. Casually, you made your way towards the others, arms full of shopping bags and oblivious to the chaos that had just ceased.

"Hello, everyone- what did I miss?" You looked around the room, your eyes coming to a stop at the task force still in their arguing stances, your boyfriend shrouded by their silhouettes.

You arched a brow. "Okay, why is everyone looking at me like that?'

234 notes · View notes

anxiousanteaterr · 19 days

Text

Finally getting back into d&d and i got the hugest bomb dropped on me. my dm just came out swinging as my character slowly discovered that their life was pm a lie and my sweet, sweet robot The Beekeeper may not have actually been bought on clearance by a hopeful and humble farmer, but instead was BUILT by him! And that the blueprints used to manufacture the war droids going on a crusade for the Spider Queen ARE BASED OFF OF THE EXACT UNIT MODEL FOR THE BEEKEEPER. 😭😭. WHICH WAS THE ONE EXACT FEAR HE HAD WHEN HE FIRST SAW THEM.

the dm even pulled our god cleric into another chat to show him the lore legend stuff, and then the cleric showed me after, and it turns out this little farmer guy who made The Beekeeper has been like, gutted and hooked up to a mainframe and is being used to create and power the evil ones 😭😭

so now we gotta go and stop him (the overarching goal is to basically give the army their own sentience so they hopefully wont work for the Spider Queen anymore + kill your first best friend ever haha 🙂) and im NOT!!! LOOKING FORWARD TO IT!!! The Beekeeper has only the sweetest and happiest memories of his owner/builder?? and neither he or I as the player are prepared to have to pull the plug!

The Beekeeper has also apparently been able to think and care and feel THIS WHOLE TIME? We all thought it was like, gained sentience. That's what I initally intended. Built over time. A weird quirk or a marvel of some kind. But apparently FROM THE VERY BEGINNING he was PLANNED to be able to do this. But so much of it was erased and/or locked for reasons he does not know and/or cannot remember.

I'm assuming it was to protect him, seeing as he's the only one of his unit that wasn't forced to be evil (unless THATS just bc its the newly built ones, not the old ones). I'm bracing myself for the gut-wrenching monologue both me and the Beekeeper are going to have to endure as he goes to end this poor man's life and free the robots.

This all just hit SUPER HARD in SO MANY WAYS because a huge part of the Beekeeper IS his sentience and freedom! He's very unique in this! The world this campaign takes place in has plenty of Warforged, the planet we started on is v futuristic, but the Beekeeper is not a Warforged. He is a ROBOT. Built for BEE KEEPING. Who gained (or I guess unlocked) sentience all on his own. And it started all the way back (20+ years ago) when he was first made. Part of his sentience gaining too, was getting files from the other Beekeeper units, whomst of which many of THEM gained sentience as well, and we're trying to help awaken the others. He didn't even really see the signs until after he was sentient enough to really look back on his old files and actually think on them.

THIS IS ALSO HUGE because The Beekeeper's class is "Barbarian". The way we made this work is he is just built with special kits to get juiced up and "rage". Programmed to know how to fight with Barbarian skillsets. Special mods and all that, and skills that "unlock" once the proper experience is gained (this is something he had from before meeting the party, too. His current memory for it is "a friend of the farmer modded me to be this way to help protect him from robbers", but uh... we'll see...)

His subclass though, is the "Path of the Ancestral Guardian", which I specifically picked bc of the previous Robo-Agri robots that also gained sentience. And also bc the Beekeeper's main goal in battle is to kill fast in order to protect his family (the rest of the party). He has on multiple occassions dove headfirst into battle while everyone else stays back, shielded others, and overall tries to be the main target. That part was not planned, but worked out well in the end. I also implimented the subclass in a more traditional Barbarian way.

Meaning that, for The Beekeeper (and he unlocked this when we were in the middle of an illithid dungeon), he flew into his semi-robotic, semi-sentient soul powered rage one fight when things were looking bleak, and the ghosts of previous Robo-Agri robots who had also gained sentience but paid the ultimate price for it, rose up to help out by protecting the other party members.

EVERY TIME The Beekeeper goes into a rage THE GHOSTS OF HIS FALLEN BRETHREN come to aid him! Being one of the few of robot-kind to awaken, they are willing to follow and aid a fellow sibling! And they help protect his family because thats what he wants the most! And The Beekeeper is aware of this and is very grateful for the help!

So OFC The Beekeeper going to want to help the robots who were built and/or converted to be evil! ESPECIALLY since the blueprints for them are ALMOST IDENTICAL to him, and The Beekeeper KNOWS that Aknor must have taken his creator and... did that to him... BECAUSE he saw how useful and versatile The Beekeeper is! The bitch had FRONT ROW TICKETS to see The Beekeeper NOT be an apiary tender, but be a fucking WAR MACHINE that did the job WELL.

And for The Beekeeper to just ignore that?? To just brush it off and go "eh not my problem" ??? That would be THE most ooc thing I could do.

I just RRARRRGH. This whole session has been a fucking CRISIS for The Beekeeper and for ME!!!

... i need to go lay down.

#d&d #RRARRGGH #BITING #GNASHING

1 note · View note

kinsbin · 4 years

Text

Title: Training Word Count: 3390 Pairing: Ares/Reader, Apollo/Reader, Ares/Reader/Apollo Fandom: Blood of Zeus Rating: Explicit (18+ Only)

Summary: Apollo likes to flirt with you while you train with Ares to become a great soldier. A joke on your part about letting them both compete for you gets a little out of hand.

Set with Blood of Zeus Gods in mind, but I'm sure you could imagine them to look however you want.

A/N: If I must write the content for the x readers in this series so be it I’m going to write.

AO3 Link

----

It had been a joke, you swore it.

Well, perhaps that was a lie. It was only half of a joke.

To be honest, all you could remember was Apollo’s snide voice overhead of Ares’ training session with you. A musing coo meant to distract the other god so that the relentless work you were put through may go slower and bide him more time to find a way to mess it up. Apollo’s curious musings of bewilderment over how well you could handle his sword versus Are’s hammer were met with a snide retort about how Ares’ hammer was ten times better than Apollo could hope to be. You paused to watch them bicker, appreciating the break from the otherwise exhausting session, and smiled behind your war hammer as the two gods you adored bickered before you.

The words had slipped out of your mouth as more a commitment to the theatrics of the argument more than anything else:

“Why don’t the two of you let me decide?”

It had brought about a lengthy pause before the look shared between the two gods turned into something of matching mischievous smirks. You paled at the realization of what was going through the two god’s heads at the same time and something about it made your throat go dry and the space between your legs throb.

It was how you then found yourself being pushed into the soft, silken sheets of Apollo’s bed by the taller god, your lips claimed by his own with tender curiosity as hands trailed up your side with teasing touches. You weren’t aware just when your clothes had come off, but it didn’t matter as Apollo’s large hands covered your breast with a careful caress, pinching a nipple between tanned fingers while his lips accosted the side of your neck with hungry kisses. The attention made you gasp, hands flying up to tangle themselves into Apollo’s long hair.

Beyond the lover on top of you, you were able to watch as Ares began removing his own clothes with a methodical slowness, his red eyes never leaving your form as it was ravished beneath another. Jealousy seemed to spark inside of him as much as competition did, making you mewl helplessly as Apollo’s mouth trailed from your neck to one of your breasts, his lips hungry for it as he nibbled along the tender flesh.

“You’re so soft, (Y/N),” Apollo purred with praise thick on his voice, “So beautiful…”

The praise that fell from the lips of a being ten times as beautiful as yourself made your face flush bright red, a sight Apollo seemed to enjoy as he gazed down with moderate amusement at you. A fingertip trailed from your breasts to your face, cupping your cheek in one large palm and letting his fingertips rub gently along your kiss-swollen lips, pulling the bottom one down curiously. On instinct, you opened your mouth and took the digit between your parted lips, sucking on it while one heated gaze met the other, making him hum in approval.

A firm hand fell on Apollo’s shoulder, pulling the other god away with a sharp tone of, “Get off.”

Apollo smirked as he rolled off of you, tilting his head with a click of his tongue.

“So demanding, even in bed? I doubt you could rile them up anymore than this, don’t you think? I mean, just look at them.”

You gasped as Apollo pulled your legs apart with ease, revealing your soaking core. He inserted his fingers with little warning, two thick digits filling you up and making you keen with delight as he pumped them in and out a few times. He pulled away to reveal the hefty amount of slick that coated them with a satisfied quirk of his eyebrow. A challenge to the other god. Ares growled in return, gripping at you fiercely before bringing you up so that you sat comfortably in his lap, your hands splayed on his hard chest and your hips straddling his own. Ares’ half hard length rubbed teasingly along your entrance, making you squirm in appreciation of the friction.

Still his gaze was… soft… A gentle and concerned look warmed in red eyes as he asked the quiet question of if this was truly okay. The Gods were large, much larger than you - whomst they had comfortably sandwiched between their massive forms - and as desperate as he was to destroy you in that single moment there was a necessary hesitance. A careful judgement of limits all soldiers had within themselves and towards others. It was simply in his nature.

You smiled nonetheless, nodding your head before leaning forward to kiss Ares. Your mouth was so much smaller than his own, it barely did work to cover his full lips, but it was all the permission he needed as his arms wrapped around your waist and he pulled you closer to him, consuming you against his body as his tongue pushed past your parted mouth to taste you.

Already you felt full. He took up so much of your mouth with one fell swoop. One hand was enough to grip half of your ass, spreading it apart and allowing his other hand to dip into your dripping cunt. Ares’ fingers were thicker than Apollo’s. Just one was enough to fill you to the brim, stuffing you up and making you moan into his mouth. You felt Ares’ lips form into a smirk as he continued to work one finger into you, pumping and curling the digit in all the right ways as he grew harder in tandem to the soft noises that fell into his lips from your own.

Apollo slid himself behind you, pressing his lips into your neck and trailing kisses down your spine. His hands held your waist as he let his own hardness touch needily at your back, his tongue darting out to lick up the sweat against your skin before trailing downwards.

“Move your fingers,” Apollo hummed towards Ares, and you shivered at the feeling of his breath on your lower lips. It made Ares growl into your mouth, pulling away to frown down at his fellow god and growl a dark ‘fuck off’ in the lust of his possessiveness. It seemed to urge his fingers faster inside of you, adding a second and stretching you in a way that made you keen in delight against his chest. Ares smirked, gazing at Apollo, who pouted through the edges of blonde hair and thick lashes.

There’s a moment of tense silence between the two before Ares relents with a roll of his eyes, his fingertips sliding from your entrance and making you keen in desperation to be filled once more. Your whines turned to moans as Apollo’s lips replaced Ares’ fingers. He sucked and lapped at your entrance like a starving man, using his grip on your thighs to hold your squirming form still as he plunged his tongue between your folds, humming in appreciation of the taste.

“Listen to that,” Ares mused with a lopsided smirk, “Your slutty little moans… Better than the finest music on Olympus.”

Your face heated up red with embarrassment while, beneath you, Apollo chuckled. It sent a series of sweet vibrations up your entrance as his tongue gave one more longing lick at your clit.

“That we can both seem to agree on.”

His lips returned, nibbling gently on your clit as he let a finger slide into your entrance alongside it, making you keen into Ares’ chest. Ares busied himself with lowering his lips to your neck, leaving a fearsome series of bites and bruises along the bare flesh. A signal that you were his. Surely Apollo would fight to leave marks of his own as well. It was the one enjoyable thing about a human lover. Their marks lasted. Their test of just how much your body could take was always different.

“A-Ap...Ares...App-pollo-Gods I-Hh~.”

You tried to form words but nothing came out beyond the stuttering of desire, your entire form trying to work its way out of the god’s bruising grips as they ravished you. Instead each form held you closer, devouring you until the overstimulation brought a pulsating pleasure to your cunt and an orgasm that rolled off of your lips as much as it did down Apollo’s face. Ares swallowed your moans and curses in his own kiss, his deep and guttural growl of arousal shaking your very core as Apollo hummed with absolute delight. As though he were tasting the sweetest nectar of ambrosia.

Ares took a moment to pull away from your lips. To drag his tongue up to collect the sweat of your pleasure against his taste buds and revel in it. Below, Apollo took one last languid lick of your insides, placing a kiss on your clit before sitting up to kiss the back of your neck. Turning your head, you whined in a needy tone. Your mouth was desperate for your lovers. Apollo obliged with ease, allowing you to taste yourself upon his mouth while Ares’ cock gilded sweetly along your entrance, now fully rigid and everything of what your pleasure needed at that moment.

“Our needy little mortal seems like they want something,” Apollo teased in a whisper behind you, his kisses burning your skin as he chuckled, “I wonder what they could want?”

“Beats me,” Ares played along with a gruff chuff of his own, “All they seem to want to do is whine like a bitch in heat. Can you spit out your words, little one?”

Ares’ touch was hard as he gripped your chin between thumb and forefinger, pinching your face so that you were forced to meet his stern, red eyes. Your face was red with embarrassment as it was held still, your gaze squirming without success to land itself anywhere but by the lustful eyes of your mentor. Instead you were forced into it, and Ares quirked one eyebrow upwards with moderate curiosity as he waited for your answer. Behind the two of you, Apollo chuckled. His heat radiated off of him in waves as his fingers curled around your body and tugged lightly at the most sensitive areas they could find in an effort to make you squirm with desire.

“Come now,” Apollo whispered, “We know you’re not mute. Tell us what you’d like us to do to this pretty little cunt of yours~.”

A feathered touch to your throbbing, sensitive core made you whine loudly, drunk off the pleasure the two gods dangled right in front of your nose. Opening your mouth best you could against Ares’ tight grip, you simply let your words spill with starving desperation. Drool fell alongside words as you squirmed and gripped Ares' wrist with shaking fingers.

“A-Ah- Please… I w-want you inside me. Aressss please I want to feel you f-fuck me! I want to feel you both, pleaaaaase please- gods- ahhh - please-!”

Your begging was sweet, making both gods blush in awe at the squirming pile of flesh between them. Their dicks throbbed desperately and Ares could only grunt his approval, hearing you keen hungrily. He threw you down into the bed, flipped you so that you were on all fours, and positioned himself at your aching hole. His tip was large and dribbling with precum. The feeling of it pressing hot and heavy on your entrance made you whimper and moan, an effort to buck back on the cock not going unnoticed as Ares chuckled. He steadied your hips with his hands as Apollo reached out to grab at some of your hair, tugging and smiling as your attention was turned to him once more.

“Can I have your mouth, little one?”

It was silly of him to ask when he was in the perfect position to take, but you didn’t care about formalities. Instead you let their mouth open up as wide as it could, lolling your tongue out and showing the way the strands of your drool clung to your lips as you begged desperately for your god’s cock. Apollo chuckled, rubbing your hair in one more affectionate swoop before pressing the tip along your mouth. He slid it in carefully, his dick thinner than Ares’ certainly but longer by the slimmest margins. It curved beautifully down your throat, making you gag for a moment before your throat began to relax. You started to breathe through your nose all while Apollo exhaled breathy moans of delight at the warmth encompassing him.

“Gods your mouth,” Apollo gasped sweet praises as his head threw itself back, “So tight - mmmm - so wet… Sweet thing you are heaven.”

“Not as tight as this cunt, though,” Ares’ growl was dark behind you, reminding you that he would not be forgotten. The massive god of war gave no warning to you before pushing himself forward. He sheathed the tip of his cock within your tight entrance, making you scream in delight as your walls clung to him. The vibrations of your pleasure made their way up Apollo’s cock, causing the god’s hand to tighten in your hair as he cursed gently through gritted teeth. As still as he tried to keep his hips for his you, he could not help the gentle shift of them so that his cock pushed itself just a little deeper to the back of your throat.

Ares continued pushing behind you with little care to your form. He was relentless and determined to fit himself within you. To take the pleasure that had been teased to him the whole day. Fingertips left hefty bruises on your hips as your eyes rolled into the back of your head. You used Apollo’s hips for balance as the tips of your toes curled through Ares’ relentless pushing.

Once the god of war was bottomed out, he let out a hefty snarl that buried itself in the back of your neck, making you shudder as your walls clenched around his girthy cock. It throbbed inside of you as he gave a single moment to allow you comfort. To adjust to him as he revelled in the warm, tight heat that surrounded him. Both he and Apollo were lost in the wetness of you, their human lover. In the way you squirmed as you were filled with two hefty cocks. You felt your stomach bulge with Ares’ girth, your guts churning as your jaw began to ache around Apollo.

Your signal was all they needed. You shifted your hips back and moaned weakly around Apollo’s cock, eyes gazing up in a teary, silent permission to openly destroy you.

And - oh - how willing the gods were to please.

Ares movements were primal as he dragged himself along the walls of your cunt, feeling them clench around his girth with sweet desperation until only the tip was left inside of you. He pushed back in with fearsome greed, making moan after moan spill from your mortal lips in the process. He continued his relentless pace. So fast was his force that you could feel your insides churning with devoured intensity. Your guts shifted with each heavy push of the god’s desperate cock, making goosebumps shine along your body alongside the sweat that formed.

Your nails dug into Apollo’s smooth thighs, not leaving marks but offering the god a pleasant pain through his pleasure as his own hips moved in tandem with the other god’s to fill you up perfectly. His dick thrust so tenderly inside of your mouth - such a different feeling than Ares’ roughness - that you could barely keep up with the argument of sensations. Drool slid past your lips and dribbled down Apollo’s handsome cock, landing on the bed sheets below as his grip remained firm on your hair.

“Gods, you feel so tight,” Apollo moaned as Ares grunted his agreement, his body covering up the entirety of your form as he pounded into you with a hunger only a god could truly have.

“Tight and wet,” Ares growled with a chuckle in his tone, “This what you want, little mortal? To be taken at once by two gods? To be worshiped like this? To be fucked in a way - hh - no other mortal man could satisfy you?”

“We wouldn’t let anyone else satisfy you,” Apollo’s own growl warned in front of you as he let his hand grip your scalp tighter, “No, you are ours and you belong to us. This is our mouth to use and our cunt to fuck, isn’t that right? Only ours. Our perfect little human.”

You could do nothing but moan in agreement around the two, your brain changing into mush as the gods accosted you. Pleasure clouded the edges of your vision as your stomach churned with clenching desire. Your second orgasm built itself up in the center of your body, making your toes curl as your moans grew more and more vocal by the moment. Ares sensed your impending orgasm by the way your walls fluttered around him, making him groan as he picked up his pace, snapping his hips hard into you. The sound of flesh slapping along flesh echoed as he worked himself greedily into you. Chasing his own release alongside yours as your grip on Apollo only intensified through your heady pleasure. Tears had begun to spill from your eyes, wetting your already damp face as Apollo kept his grip steady, dragging yourmouth along his cock to fuck you at his own pace.

It was when Ares’ fingers moved to your clit and Apollo tugged tightly on you that you lost it. You came with a moan around Apollo and a tight squeeze around Ares, making both gods curse as their own hips snapped to speed up their impending orgasms. Ares came with a guttural, heavy growl that echoed war drums in the back of your mind. You could feel the throbbing of the dick inside of you as it filled your insides up with rope after rope of cum. Apollo held your head still as he came inside of your whining mouth, shooting his own sweet tasting ropes down your throat. He brought you to swallow each strand as you squirmed and gasped around the sudden intrusion.

The three of you remained like that for what felt like eternity, connected within one another as you caught your breath. Apollo’s hand continued to stroke at your head, ruffling the already messed up strands of hair in his movement of praise. He eventually slid his softening cock from your mouth, watching with a light chuckle as you coughed up a few strands of his cum that did not make it down your throat. The semen and spit glittered down your neck as you gasped. You collapsed all the way on the sheets beneath you once Ares slid out as well, exhaling as he admired the way his own semen dribbled from your full entrance.

Sliding into the soft bed sheets, you shut your eyes and heaved a breath of fresh air, your limbs sore and cunt aching from the abuse it had suffered. Yet it was the most delicious feeling in a way. Sweet and hot and sticky all at once, you ached much like you did after a good workout session.

Apollo lay down first with you, his lips finding your forehead and pressing a kiss to it with a chuckle.

“Such a good thing for us,” He cooed sweetly, “Taking us so well like that. You’re a natural, (Y/N).”

Ares scoffed above them both, sliding into his own space against you and tracing designs on your trembling thigh. Not one for as many praising words as Apollo, he simply showed his appreciation with touch above all else. You all but purred into his touch as they let your body relax.

---

You had no idea when you fell asleep, nor how long it was.

You simply woke up a moment later with sheets over your body and a pile of fresh fruit presented in a glimmering gold bowl, your lovers gone to work about the day as they got their rest.

A smile broke on your lips as you accepted a pomegranate from the golden platter and began to open it, watching the world of Olympus continue on beyond the comfort of Apollo’s pantheon.

#blood of zeus #blood of zeus imagine #blood of zeus x reader #apollo x reader #ares x reader #apollo imagine #ares imagine #kinley writes #lemon #i'm weak and thirsty ok

935 notes · View notes

ennoshawty · 3 years

Text

HQ CAPTAINS AS THINGS

i was bored and felt like doing a crackfic thing but i didn’t have any solid themes or good ideas

SO I PRESENT TO YOU - THE CAPTAINS. AS THINGS. IDK HOW TO WORD THIS BUT YOU’LL SEE AS WE GO ALONG.

warnings: VERY LONG, slandering a crybaby oikawa (lovingly), mentions f!reader, shitposting, mentions of violence in kita's, (a bit) yandere!kita, cursing, unedited, me being an idiot

officer!daichi

we are: vigilante/troublemaker

loving the enemies-to-lovers trope so much

nah bro you ain’t full criminal (bc my preppy ass could never) you just do the small vandalism things y’know like drawing peepees on government buildings and knocking over bins

u literally confessed to him by spraypainting the entire billboard by his workplace “I LIKE YOU” like way to go girl

He didn’t appreciate the creative graffiti but he rlly likes u so all u had to do was clean it and then next thing u know yall are out on a cute cafe date

but let’s talk about before yall got together

he’d CHASE u thru alleyways when he’d catch you writing “police sux” on the fuckin wall

bro is NOT AT ALL afraid to jump onto the roofs it’s FRIGHTENING to see this huge ass police officer storm after u

HES SO FAST HOT DAMN WOMAN HOW DO U GET AWAY FROM HIM??? USAIN BOLT WHOMST???

you’d almost always get away by a hair - he’s SO SO close

and it frustrates him but excites u oooooo arrest me shawty

and this would continue for a while

but yall have such fun fun banter - you’d tease him and he’d say something back and you’d bolt and he’d chase

some days he’d catch you. but in those times u slip away somehow

he’s having so much fun and doesn’t even know it

and then at one point he doesn’t even care about bringing u to justice anymore. he knows it’s bad for business and it’s unprofessional but he’s so attracted to u

he doesn’t even know it. HES IN DENIAL!!! his mind: “oh i’m just asking about her so that i know her motives” bruh no u just asked about our fav pastry this aint about crime anymore

and when he finally gets it,,,DINGDINGDINGDING SOUND THE ALARMS !!! MAN IS WHIPPED!! he’s more shy around u awww,,,doesn’t even want to chase u anymore but he will still engage in banter w u.

yall get a little peace treaty in the lil crush stage - you both are kinda aware of ur feelings towards each other but don't really wanna mess it up and jeopardize whatever's going on like bros PLEASE JUST KISS ITS INFURIATING

it’s more of a competition to see who will break the other first (and you lost he’s too hot)

he lets u joyride his cop car in an empty parking lot <3 he is the one <3 this is true love

u gotta marry him right now bro no excuses

u are no longer on the crime side of the law,,,u support him and only him fuck the rest of the cops (i’m jk of course...or am i)

u are his badass sidekick <3 unofficially of course until he marries u

u help him with the small things like helping lost children find their parents and helping old ladies cross the street

but you want to do the FUN stuff - chasing thieves and arresting drunkards.

unfortunately, he loves u too much to put u in danger so he keeps u from doing the dangerous things

after some protesting later, he trusts u to take care of urself. and now yall have a competition just like old times - whoever catches the most baddies at the end of the month wins (he WILL scold u if ur too reckless though)

THE TWO OF U ARE JUST GOOD COP BAD COP UHAHAHAHAHAHA

but it’s much more complicated than that - it’s either ur the laidback one and he’s the strict one or ur the fiery one and he’s the person like “calm down”

PLEASE HE HATES BRINGING U TO INTERROGATIONS he’s trying to be serious but you keep making him laugh istg he has to kick u out each time

u still make him laugh when u pout-glare at him thru the glass

bro says he’s not the stereotypical cop but the moment u surprise him with donuts and coffee in the morning he will make out w u right then and there

even though yall dating he still won’t let u play with his equipment

but sometimes u grab his walkie talkie when he’s not looking and prank call the others

and his coworkers know by now they’re like “oh it’s daichis gf” and go along with it HAHAHAHA “this is alpha 1, daichi just contracted ligma, over.” “roger, but what’s ligma? over.” “*inhale* LIGMA-” *daichi takes the walkie talkie back*

his coworkers are chill lmaoooo they love u two as a couple THEY ARE VERY SUPPORTIVE they planned a surprise anniversary party of when u joined the force (unofficially)

the juniors tanaka and noya are jelly ooooo but they respect their captain <3

u loooooove hanging out w the starry-eyed new recruit hinata and he’s bouncing around asking u personal questions “how did you date the commander!!! what’s he like as a bf??” he also accidentally exposes how much daichi talks about u in the office before he drags him away and murders him off camera

he does get u a walkie talkie that’s just connected to his line, tho. for emergencies. it’s ur second phone basically that only has his number in it

daichi LOVES it when u massage him after he’s had a long day but his shoulders are stiff as a statue,,,he’s also super stronk and can carry u anywhere <333

IMAGINE HE HAS A POLICE DOG - he doesn’t, but he’ll get one of his buddies to bring u a k9 unit so u can pet it and when he sees how happy u are he considers getting one PLSSS IT WOULD FIT HIM HELPPP

bro is VERY strict on safety. bulletproof glass in yalls house. alarms + cameras everywhere. trackers on every device. underground bunker. (just kidding lol)

daichi teaches u self-defense and gets u a bejeweled taser for ur bday <333 MARRY THIS MAN RIGHT NOW OR I’LL-

in other words i love daichi and he is husband material WIFE ME UP BUDDY

househusband!oikawa

we are: girlboss sugar mommy

somehow you tamed this bish to becoming your obedient malewife

and by obedient i mean whiny but compliant

IS MORE ATTACHED TO YOUR BLACK CARD THAN TO YOU. I SAID IT. THE TRUTH.

sure, he’s pretty and gives affection sometimes but the only time he’s bein cute and snuggly w u is when a new fendi purse came out and he wants it

his specialty is cooking but he’s so lazy he’s all “just get the maid to do it”

please give ur workers a raise he’s so demanding

when you take him to ur business parties hes ALWAYS bragging about you and ur large house with this and that and his favorite: indoor hot tub. he always brings up the indoor hot tub.

only reason you bring him is cuz he’s pretty and he whines when you leave him alone for too long

yall cant even stay for too long - he’ll practically drag u out of the building and whining that it’s too hot and his suit is too stuffy and to call a limo

he’s not afraid to embarrass u if u dont give him what he wants and he will spit out food at a formal dinner if its not to his liking

probably in competition w househusbands! makki and mattsun about who gets the best house so he’s constantly begging u for an extension to the house “please babe!!! makki has-” “no.”

8/10 times throws tantrums in public and 1465/10 times throws tantrums in the house

he wants to cry for the sake of crying. one time he lost his shirt and he wouldn’t stop bawling for 15 min

please find him a hobby

crybaby . the moment u give him the glare of death it’s over. but he’s got a cute crying face which makes up for his annoying whimpering

like he made the mistake of throwing a temper tantrum in the mall only for you to glare at him with a look that said “we’re discussing this when we get home and you’re gonna get your ass beat” and walk away. immediately stopped what he was doing and he was running after u, sniffling and mumbling apologies

please humble him and have him sleep outside. the couch is too luxurious to banish him to. he made sure of it himself. it’s reclining and has charging ports. he will not learn his lesson that way

does NOT want you to get a pet or a kid or even another sugar baby/househusband - he wants to be the center of ur attention

speaking of which he HATES it when you work for too long or work overseas. when u come back he’ll pout at u and give u the petty silent treatment

don’t bother trying to comfort him he thrives off of it and he’ll keep going so u can keep paying attention to him. if u just ignore him back he’ll come crawling back to u. “WHY ARE YOU IGNORING ME IGNORING YOU?? DO YOU EVEN LOVE ME ANYMORE???”

one time yall got into a fight and he was all like “since ur being a rude mommy i’ll just find someone else !!!” inside u were like “oh god finally” but instead u said “okay”

ohmygod he panicked. he was rlly expecting for u to fight for him,,, but he doesn’t want to admit defeat first so he tries to go thru with it but you literally dont care. even when he has his chanel luggage packed and he’s standing by the door ur just like “ok bye bitch”

So he’s trying to stand by the door and wait for u to say that ur joking. ur not.

“fine! I’m leaving now!” “okay.” “...*sniffles*” “tooru, go.” “WAAAAH NO IM SORRY I DONT WANT TO-”

u knew this was going to happen sadly. u even hid the keys to all of the sports cars u own just in case he was actually going to go thru with it

tries to get in the gossip circle with the neighborhood trophy wives but they don’t think he’s cool enough. they like u though. they think ur hot asf and oikawa doesn’t like them no more bc theyre hitting on his ATM. but thanks to that u know all the gossip and shit even though u don’t ask for it

Every time u pass by a store where he thinks he wants something he’ll just cling to u and give the puppy dog eyes. like it could be out of nowhere and u see it and you’re like “where. which store.”

bro once he went luxury he never went back. he wouldn’t EVER step foot into a grocery store ever again congrats he’s been bimbo-ified

beat him with ur gucci belt pls it’s so funny

also please please PLEASE discipline him. tell him it’s NOT okay to just randomly purchase the entire swarovski store or to throw a party at ur house just bc he’s feeling petty about u being at work for too long. ofc he’ll bitch about it but you need to be firm

but don’t worry,,,he’ll get the idea when u take away black card privileges and slap him around (lovingly)

now he has to ask permission like a good boy. he’ll kneel and hug u and give a lil pout and whine

you got a bigass man child i’m sorry maam u should’ve picked tobio or ushi

ceo!kuroo

we are: secretary

bruh keeps it mostly professional during work hours

but that all gets shedded off like a snake when we on break

one minute he’s all “get these papers done by today or i swear on all that is holy i will destroy you” and then later he’s all “hey sweetheart wanna grab a cup of coffee”

flirty flirty FLIRTY FLIRTY AAAAA HES A MENACE

but you’re less than impressed bc y’know when the time clocks out and its time to go back to work he’s ruthless once more

HUMBLE HIM FOOL only when you’re on break though

will NOT stand for anyone else in the workplace bullyin u - NO WAY. only HIM

he’s got TONS and TONS of dirt on everyone in the office - NO ONE is safe so they wouldn’t even dare

RIP janet from accounting

that dumb bitch made the mistake of insulting u to ur face and in front of him. never heard from her again

it’s not even limited to the other employees - he’s not afraid to go off on a potential business partner if they dared disrespect you

bruh tries to call u on ur off days for the most randomest shit and to get ur attention

*picks up phone* “sir?” “ah! my favorite secretary ever! listen, i need you to grab my pens from my desk at the office and bring them to my place.” “...with all due respect, it’s 2 am, sir.”

but u have to comply with his ridiculous demands cuz he’s the bank

and he depends on u completely. as much as he hates to admit it - u have his schedules, itinerary, provide coffee, performance rates, stock info, you name it.

once u were out sick and he had the worst management - he’s not used to working without you

def tries to get some of ur workload off of u bc he’s worried that the stress of working for him made u sick + he doesn’t want to go thru scheduling again

prolly gets bored in meeting rooms and sends u little smirks and wiggles his eyebrows and weird looks while he’s sitting and ur standing in the corner like bruh pay attention

maybe sometimes he’s secretly makin fun of the presenter and doodling on his spare sticky note something funny to make u crack a smile

he’ll tease u for it of course “oh, secretary! you should be paying more attention! what would you do if this was important?” bruh i can multitask now keep airdropping me ur selfies i’m saving all of them (news flash: u dont save his dumbass selfies otherwise his ego will inflate too much)

sometimes likes to pull u aside from work to hug u - you say it’s highly unprofessional but he says it’s his stress reliever

you ALMOST got caught by one of the newbies and he was kabedon-ing you

he tries to play it off (since u were embarrassed too) but u know better,,,DO NOT LET HIM FORGET ABOUT IT he turns red and embarrassed every single time USE THIS TO UR ADVANTAGE !!

never goes into an elevator without you bruh is so attached to u n holds the doors open for you

but you have to open normal doors for him if he doesn’t know how it works (hint: manual doors. “why isn’t it opening on its own?” “sir, there’s a handle.” “but?? what does it do??”)

bruh acts like a dumbass sometimes so you can baby him :/// wtf man just because you’re rich doesn’t mean i’ll- ...wait...how much did you say…? that many zeros? HAND ME THAT FORK YES I’LL FEED YOU COME HERE- HERE COMES THE AIRPLANE BITCH

brings u to overseas trips and he spoils u too

no matter how much you insist that you’re ok he gives u a lot of luxurious items. “think of it as a bonus from me.” NOW YOU JUST HAVE A COLLECTION OF NICE SHOES/BAGS/JEWELRY AND HE LOVES IT WHEN YOU WEAR THEM TO WORK IT MAKES HIM SO HAPPY UGHHHHH

BRUH just a sugar daddy at this point “you have to look presentable for the next focus group so here’s a nice rolex watch” “sir, i don’t need-” “ah ah ah - it’s my treat.”

it’s pointless to refuse him but he still teases u for it like what???? “if i didn’t know any better, secretary, i’d say you’re just doing it for my money and not my fabulous looks and personality.” “exactly.” “hey!”

yall go for drinking parties a lot. whether with the whole branch or just the two of u

KARAOKE W KUROO AFTER A LONG DAY OF WORK <333 becomes a ritual between the two of u

he’s so silly when he’s drunk lmfaoooo goofy ass mf

but that’s only when it’s the two of u. he controls his alcohol around others and his uncool side is only for u <3

also ur the only one he trusts to take him back to his place and handle him

it’s the other way around too - when u drink a lot he looks after you <333

you have a higher tolerance than him and sometimes u have competitions between the two of u on who can drink more but then yall always end up shitfaced

HES the one who has a crush on you

you know the drill - gaslight gatekeep girlboss

he’ll do anything for u but wouldn’t ever admit it he simp

offers u the keys to his estate and offers for you to LIVE with him

bruh just marry me already ok WAIT WE’RE NOT EVEN DATING YOU NEED TO WORK ON THAT SIR-

he’s so awkward tryna confess to u,,,he may be this big hotshot ceo but he’s acting like a schoolgirl in love

probably prints u a confession when he asks u to go to the fax machine lmfao what a nerd

in other words ceo!kuroo is a nerd and you need to top him immediately get that bank

dog hybrid!bokuto

we are: owner

Husky-malamute breed!!! BEEG DOGGIE VERY HAPPY N DROOLY <333

OVERLY HYPER. JUMPS ON ANYONE AND U AT ANY GIVEN MOMENT

he’s well trained i swear but the moment he sees something of interest then i’m sorry you just lost him

please if a robber came in he wouldn’t even attack them he’d just tackle them w hugs

he loves loves loves snuggles <333 u busy? nope!!! hug time!!! cooking something?? oo lemme see!!! whoops look at all those tomatos on the ground. u got a deadline coming up and u really need to focus?? CUDDLE TIIIIIIME- w-wait - huh?? why are u shoving me off?? do you - do you not - huh?!?! WHY ARE YOU LOCKING ME OUT OF THE ROOM?? NO!!!! I LOVE YOU!!! IDK WHAT EXAMS ARE BUT I WANT CUDDLES!!! HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME????!!!

the WORST things u could ever do to him is leave him and call him a bad boy

HE CRIES ON THE SPOT </3 HOW COULD YOU </3

soso bummed when u go out of the house without him </333 waits by the door patiently waiting for u to come back </333 sob sob

the moment he hears the door unlock he LEAPS and his tail is wagging like CRAZY

he is SO STRONG. almost always knocks u over whenever he jumps on u

destroys EVERY toy u bring him. u leave him for 5 seconds and there’s stuffing all over the floor and whatever u brought him is nonexistent

tugs on the leash when u walk so much that it SNAPS

loves romping w the other dogs in the dog park but he needs to tone down on his friendliness he almost killed a lil orange chihuahua

gets distracted by EVERYTHING. ooh, squirrel! oo, butterfly! OOO HUMAN CHILD!! MUST EAT!!!

ok while he might be friendly, he still gets super super jealous. you both were outside and u were petting the neighborhood black cat and bruh almost swallowed his head

which u thought was weird bc the two are normally friends and are pretty nice around each other

so now he’s more feisty around him and any other cat that’d get ur attention

If it was a person, then that’s another thing. He’d be very friendly at first but then slowly realize that ur attention is more directed on them than him. then he’d go ballistic

but when u scold him for practically assaulting the poor dude and call him a bad boy,,,he’s lost it

u have to lock him in the other room and he’s crying and whimpering, scratching at the door. all he wanted to do was protect u from that bad bad man who took away his owner’s attention !!!

def snarls at the dude next time he comes into ur house/apartment...dude never came back

“GRRR” “AAAA GET UR FRIGGIN DOG B-” “he don bite” YES IT DO GET UR-”

doggie bokuto rlly tries to be slick...it doesn’t work. like he tries to do that thing when he’s a total demon towards the guy but then act like an angel around u but it doesnt work bc he’s not smooth

doggie intelligence: 2 IQ. one time u got him a puzzle box and hid a treat in it but bruh couldnt figure it out just straight up monched the entire puzzle simply bc he smelled his fav bbq treat in it

speaking of intelligence - he only knows how to say a few words like ur name and incomplete sentences. speaks in barks and whines and sometimes a word

SO BIG THAT HE GRABS FOOD FROM THE TABLE WHEN YOU’RE NOT LOOKING

u had some delicious beef steak? oh dear, where did it go? there’s ur puppy kou with steak sauce all over his lips

big fan of hiking trips, sports, literally anything that involves going out

he LOVES getting dirty outside playing. boi cant control himself from rolling around in the mud

hates baths at first but then he likes how u spray the water on him and giggles awww he likes bath time now

we all know he’s not the brightest pup of the pack but,,,he’s somehow psychic. he knows when ur taking him to the vet

HE THROWS A BIG FUSS ALL THE TIME - sometimes he tries to hide but his huge tail under the couch gives it away

and he knows when ur thinking of taking him on a walk. he also begs u to take him outside by settling his head in ur lap and pouting until u give him what he wants

he likes the big ol doggie sweaters/pjs u buy him...but he always ruins them. no matter how much u buy him, they’re all ruined. he complains how scratchy it is and it feels weird on him

knows LOTS of tricks but if u teach him more than what he already knows he will forget one of them he’s like a damn pokemon

he feels ur emotions :((( if ur mood is down his tail droops :(( and he gives u cuddles and tries to make u feel better

he even likes to make a fool out of himself and be silly if it makes u laugh :((( he’s so precious

in other words i love doggy bokuto

pirate!ushijima

we are: kidnapped

ah yes we’re are captives of the most fearsome pirates of the seas: shiratorizawa

just so you know, tendou was the instigator. he was all “let’s kidnap a noble’s kid and get the ransom money!” (whether you actually are a noble or not is up to you)

thing is, nobody’s willing to pay (if you aren’t a noble) or the pirates really pissed off the folks in charge and are now doing a manhunt

so yeah you aren’t going back anytime soon

but he’s a pretty good sport about it - very hospitable

he notices the little things u like and gets them for u <333 sighs <333

he saw you reading that book? wow look at that, there’s suddenly a stack of them and the same genre he saw you reading

but you definitely shouldn’t test him. he’s SUPER scary when it comes down to it

you saw how ruthless he was with the rogues that had dared to challenge him on sea

mf made them walk the plank

you help on the ship bc u wanna be useful and also shirabu keeps being mean

he asks u to teach the crew how to read cuz theyre dumb as shit and only know water and treasure

speaking of treasure - when he leaves u on the ship to explore a cave, he gets u really pretty jewelry <33 anything u ask for

“oh, welcome back captain. how was your mission?” “i brought back a few trinkets i thought you might like.” *reveals whole chest of priceless gems* “are they to your liking? if not, we can set sail for something else that might interest you.” “I-”

bruh got a pet eagle - u ask the crew and they dont even know how tf it happened

hell, even he doesn’t know how it happened wtf. “oh. one day it flew down to me and i fed it. that’s all.” wtf

equivalent to diluc’s bird - he didn’t even give it a name so he gives u the honors

U name him rigatoni (you got a great naming sense btw)

oh my god oh my god oh my god HE TRIES TO PROTECT U WHEN PPL WERE TRYNA INVADE THE SHIP

it was the first thing he did no cap - burst into ur room and scoops u up <33333

“what the-” “we need to get you to safety. we are under attack.” and holds u close to his chest AAAHSIDHFPSDHFN OH MY LORD YES

HAS THE TEAM GIVE U SELF DEFENSE LESSONS AFTER THAT

tendou tries to give u a sword but ushi says no “she could hurt herself.”

“but ushiwaka! we can teach her not to hurt herself” “...it’s my orders.” “c’mon, be more honest, ushiwaka! what’s the real reason?”

he goes quiet then looks at u “...i’ll always be there to help. she’ll have me.” AOISHSDHFSNDF

HELPPPPP SIOJFDSKFJP HES SO CHARMING AND HE DOESNT EVEN TRY

but the rest of the crew are like “then what’s the point”

but tendou sneaks u a dagger just to be safe

sorry ur apart of the crew now - but they’re like a family even if they did kidnap u

oh whatever your life before wasn’t as cool as this (no offense)

they are given orders to protect u at all costs

speaking of which - ushi isn’t all that great w guns

almost blew his own head off tryna figure out how it works before reon snatched it from him

he brings you with him to towns and cities and he likes taking u to the markets to get you stuff

ushijima tell me your love language is gift-giving without telling me your love language is gift-giving-

he finds out you’re pretty good at bargaining and brings you onshore a lot more

is mesmerized at how you absolutely BERATE the merchant who was tryna rip you off like sis where is this violence coming from??? he loves it??

he also likes to stop by some pretty islands and imagines just settling down in such a nice place w you <333 SIGHS <333 VERY <333 LOUDLY <333

no matter how much he likes you...he will NOT let you drive the boat under any circumstances </3 its his livelihood c’mon man

whenever you have to stay on the ship while he’s away he sends rigatoni to give messages and the two of u talk thru messages

speaking of which rigatoni is fierce and can definitely sink his talons and his sharp beak into any bastard that dares get near you while the captain is away

wakatoshi “swimming is for pussies” ushijima - he’s water resistant

bruh so powerful he walks on water

second coming of christ who

IM JUST KIDDING he does swim but we hardly ever see it

legends say (tendou says) he looks rlly awkward doing it and only knows how to doggie paddle

speaking of our homeboy tendou - he loooves spooking the team (and especially you) with scary stories . don’t worry tho - this is all a ploy to get the beeg pirate husband to comfort u at night ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) he is ur wingman u can count on him. but his suggestions are ridiculous

“Jump off the deck and see if he’ll catch you!” um excuse me- THOU SHALT NOT PUT BIG HUSBAND TO THE TEST

he’s got good intentions...i think…

but everyone literally knows he would dive after you

in other words pirate!ushijima is a softie at heart but goddamn he probably secretly has a pet shark so dont test him or u goin overboard

mafia leader!kita

we are: associate from different group/family

kita highly respects u and yall have been acquainted since u were young with the alliance of ur families

so in a way ur childhood friends but yall do have lil bit of friendly rivalry a bit

arranged marriage whuuuutttt...yeah thats what happened but u love him <3

nobody else knows about ur arranged marriage but you two

POLITE GENTLEMAN <333 !!! HNNNNNNNN his granny raised him right even tho he’s a mafia leader

RICH BOY RICH BOY RICH BOY- ALWAYS DRESSES DASHINGLY AND SMELLS GREAT MMMMMM

he owns the majority of the underground casinos

and has lots of connections with others. countless, might i add.

you on the other hand specialize as an arms dealer so he cherishes your services the most

prob has the traditional tattoos allllll over his back and shoulders w like a dragon or sm and def a fox or kitsune

when u two were little he asked ur favorite flower and GOT THAT TATTOOED ON HIS BACK <3 probably secretly has your initials hidden in there somewhere

u both have a silent understanding of each other and he talks to u more than he does anyone

before he used to smoke but once he figured out that you didn’t like the smell of cigarettes he quit just like that

his underlings, the miya twins are so confused on how kita switches from totally brutal and ruthless to so soft around u

they can’t tease him for it, though, cuz he’d pulverize them

but they want to know more about u,,,you mysterious enigma,,,but kita would kill them if they dared asked about you

so they go to inarizaki’s most secretive informant/cyber mercenary, suna rintarou

and suna knows all about you. he saw you one time and he was curious about who you were and is now rlly scared of you because he dug too deep and you’ve got LOTS of history

he doesn’t dare tell the twins what he found no matter how much they bug him

until they bribe him at just the right price

and when aran finds out and tells kita?? ohhh boy it’s lights out for all three of them

oh my god ,,, would kill for u he loves u so much

one time you were kidnapped and held hostage

bro saw red

MAFIA ANNIHILATION SPEEDRUN ANY % NO GLITCH

he got world record time

wiped out the entire conglomerate behind it - nothing and nobody left behind after that

and of course, made sure you were safe.

yandere? ofc not...i mean...just look at him...so innocent...he would never...sharpening that knife...with splattered blood all over him...

is now joined at the hip with u,,,no matter how much you tell him you’ll be fine now and that you have tons of reliable bodyguards he won’t let it go

“don’t you have to go back to your place?” “this is my duty as both a fellow associate and your future husband.” aww,,,ur so sweet...but BRUH PLEASE GO HOME ARAN IS DOING EVERYTHING OVER THERE

makes sure to build a headquarters DIRECTLY NEXT TO YOURS so that its faster

and it’s not long until he just signs a deal to merge ur factions together (since yall getting married anyways)

and oh my god...ur underground wedding is SO SO PRETTY

absolutely DOESN’T care if he’s smuggling jewels from different countries - he’s having your ring CUSTOM MADE and the way you want it. “the diamond is too small? sure thing, darling, i’ll have it 7 times that size.”

makes sure everything is perfect in ur wedding <333 its very extravagant and even though its not really his style he’ll do anything for you

he absolutely WOULD take your last name if you wanted. FIGHT ME ON THIS

takes you to his private island for ur honeymoon so that the two of you don’t have to worry about work

meanwhile aran is scrambling around the place trying to cover for the both of you

he’s a VERY romantic husband - NEVER takes off his ring even for security. he says its practically a part of him just like you are <3

the ring has a built in tracker connected to an app. possessive? noooo...

in other words this escalated pretty quickly but i aint complaining if it gets me married to kita

--EXTRA EXTRA!! other characters’ roles!!--

officer!daichi:

karasuno squadron consists of:

cops: daichi (duh), asahi (mostly patrol, he hates confrontation), tanaka & noya (mostly accompanied by ennoshita), hinata & kageyama

investigators/detectives: sugawara, ennoshita, yamaguchi, tsukishima, kiyoko, yachi

surveillance: narita, kinoshita, tsukishima too

househusband!oikawa:

makki and mattsun are also househusbands

iwaizumi is a malewife fhasodjkasdhf-

ceo!kuroo:

lev is the newbie that walked in on u two-

janet still a bitch

kenma is his fellow ceo buddy. he also owns a multimillion dollar company and kuroo’s and his have a sort-of contract so you see him a lot in meetings

yaku is like one of the top performing managers so whenever yall have branch meetings he’s there

dog hybrid!bokuto:

kuroo is the black neighborhood cat bokuto almost murdered cough cough i did that on purpose yes i did

kenma is also another neighborhood cat. you don’t see him around that often but now that bokuto got jealous he stays far away.

hinata is the orange chihuahua i briefly mentioned

i couldn’t decide whether akaashi would stay human and be his previous owner or also be a cat/dog/owl. so lets say he’s ur human friend that is your bestie and comes over a lot. bokuto likes him, though. still gets jealous a bit.

pirate!ushijima:

tendou is practically is right hand man

the rest of the team have something to give idk how to explain pirate team members okay-

BUT BUT BUT- they do have sea rivals which are the seijoh pirates. you ran into them one day and oikawa thought you were kidnapped (you were, but you liked it there) so he tried to do you justice and failed miserably. ushijima ragdolled him into the ocean when he flirted w you.

mafia!kita:

the twins are something akin to mercenaries basically. or just plain lackeys.

suna is an informant/cyber mercenary. he gathers information about ppl which is how he knew about you. and he’s a hacker lol.

aran is his second-in-command, omimi + ginjima are his bodyguards

a/n: im going to regret posting this

#haikyuu #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu x you #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu captains #daichi sawamura #oikawa toru #kuroo tetsuro #kita shinsuke #ushijima wakatoshi #bokuto kotaro #x reader

97 notes · View notes

burgerpocalypse · 3 years

Text

I've been trying to run through some free games I got from the Epic game store, specifically Grand Theft Auto V, Creature in the Well, and most recently Night in the Woods. I quit GTAV about 60% of the way because it sucked, and I can't beat the last area of Creature, so that leaves me to talk a little about NitW and the emotional turmoil it gave me.

Upfront, I'm not interested in games with heavy emphasis on story, least of all visual novels or whatever you want to call this game. However, I've heard mostly positive things about Night in the Woods here and there for the better part of the previous decade. That and the fact I got it for $0 convinced me to finally try it out.

Night in the Woods is an adventure focused on exploration and character drama. Mae Borowski, the protagonist, is a college dropout that just moved back to her Rust Belt hometown for mysterious reasons, and becomes entangled in suspicious happenings. The player will traverse the aged suburban sprawl and rural outskirts of Possum Springs, conversing with family, friends, strangers, and everyone else, uncovering secrets and opening wounds along the way.

Seeing as how Night in the Woods is primarily a story, I'll mostly be discussing that, so look out for spoilers, yo.

After spending two years away, Mae attempts to reconnect with her previously closest friends Bea (an idealist goth whomst had considerable familial and financial responsibility thrust upon her at a young age), Gregg (an anarchist punk with bipolar tendencies), and Angus (an incredibly nice man). Mae pushes the story forward by hanging out with Bea and Gregg, and sometimes Angus. This will often involve going to social outings, running errands, committing crimes, and so on.

Other than her friends, Mae will also have opportunities to interact with her parents, various citizens, and vagrants. whom provide flavor and history to the world while also bringing some of Mae's muddled past to light. The player will traverse environments through walking and jumping around, with the occasional platforming feat required to progress or access certain areas. Occasionally, you'll be presented with small minigames, like a Guitar Hero-clone or red light/green light shoplifting, and a game-within-a-game dungeon crawler that pissed me off to no end. While most activities in the town are benign, certain important events will move the day along and lock you out of further exploration.

Early on, Mae's group stumbles upon a discarded arm and some cryptic dialogue from a few characters. After each day, Mae experiences strange dream sequences that involve platforming segments and surreal representations of her friends and the town. Several hours of gameplay later, Mae witnesses a kidnapping on Halloween by what appears to be a ghost.

In the midst of all this, Mae hangs out with her friends and discovers what they've been up to in her absence. Bea runs the family business for her father, who broke down after her mom died, putting them in dire financial straits and preventing Bea from leaving Possum Springs; she bears resentment towards Mae, since she dropped out of college and came home for no apparent reason while also not maturing at all. Gregg is aimless, sporadic, and uninhibited, while his boyfriend Angus is neat, tidy, and overly helpful. Their relationship appears strong, and they are planning to move to a new city together, though Bea is convinced it won't last.

Mae does her best to strengthen bonds while suffering from a variety of stressors, like her family's money troubles, her self-destructive tendencies and dissociative episodes, and ominous celestial beings invading her mind. This sometimes leads to inadvertent and painful social situations, especially with Bea.

Mae attempts to investigate the supposedly supernatural happenings with the help of Bea, Gregg, and Angus, while her mental health steadily declines. Eventually, the group travels deep into the woods (at night) and stumble into a cult, after which Mae suffers a great fall and enters a coma. After waking up, Mae then attempts to confront the cult head-on, though her friends arrive to help. They enter a cave, find the cult again, discover the eldritch horror they serve and explore her personal connection to it, accidentally cause a cave-in and trap the cultists, escape the cave, and try to make sense of what happened after the fact.

Now, don't get me wrong. I rather enjoyed Night in the Wood's story. I really liked all the characters. I loved the dialogue. Even the platforming and various minigames were fine, if simplistic and occasionally annoying. The structure of this paragraph seems as though it's leading towards a big 'but'. I just wanted to say that I really liked the game, even though I don't generally enjoy video game stories, and especially not video games primarily about a story. Though I'm not from a run-down midwestern town, and obviously don't have the same sort of personal relationships she does, Mae's emotional strife and insecurities really resonated with me. Her personal thoughts and reactions often made me just stop and think about the many mistakes I've made with the people I care about and all the relationships I've ruined.

However, if the plot wanted to spend so much time on Mae and her friends, it should have been about Mae and her friends. Conversely, if it wanted to be about a spooky cult in a small town, it should have spent much more time on a spooky cult in a small town. The plot is torn between two diametrically opposed focuses, those being Mae's struggles to maintain relationships and her dealing with suspicious supernatural occurrences in Possum Springs. So much time passes before anything really happens with the cult and cosmic horror that I feel some people might even forget there is a cult and cosmic horror, and Mae isn't just experiencing a psychotic break for no reason.

In the end, the cult goes unresolved, and it's unclear what the relationship is with the residents of Possum Springs, or what its powers even are. I don't need the game to explain every aspect in detail, but no one appears to be affected by the existence of the cult and its god other than Mae. My brain was going into overdrive looking for clues, making patterns, identifying red herrings, anything that might help me understand the mystery, when in reality there was no mystery to understand.

There is also a severe lack of actual choice or decision making in terms of dialogue, and a distinct absence of any real challenge in gameplay. I definitely felt that this story could have been more efficiently told if it were in a book, usually after spending a few minutes walking around trying to find something important and

It doesn't help that I sometimes accidentally skipped certain segments, since it's not always explicitly clear if an action will push the day forward and lock me in. I even completely missed a third of the investigations since I chose to check out the historical society building with Gregg second when the game expected me to do it last. This sort of problem led to me giving up completely on other story-focus games like Kentucky Route Zero since I constantly skipped and missed chunks of stuff or did things out of the intended order and ruined the flow of events.

Now this has obviously gotten a little too long, so I'll just wrap it up by saying that Night in the Woods is great and I recommend it. It made me feel feelings, deep feelings, like I was moments away from crying on more than one occasion.

Thanks for reading. I have a lot on my mind because of this game, so I hope it was worth your time.

#night in the woods #nitw #mae borowski #video games #review #coyote

69 notes · View notes

kizzys · 3 years

Text

Starkid Rewatch: The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals 🎼

Finally we have reached the hatchetfield series

My paulkins brain is ready let's gooo

I'm that one lady in the audience who's genuinely jamming out to the intro

Thinking back to how the intro was just foreshadowing the ending and that Emma gets infected too

🎶what an ass, what a bitch, what a cuuuuuuuuck🎶

I love how every musical with them has lauren and robert having a cute dance number

Paul was clearly set up to be the asshole character but we all chose to love him so they just went along with it

LATTAY HOTTAY ☕

Does she know i would die for her

I have very low blood sugar

Paulkins interaction here we go

Knowing that ted is the homeless man...

I don't know how it changes things here but somehow it just does

Reluctant friendship hcs for paul and green peace girl come through

Once again: props to June saito for understanding the duality of lesbian fashion

Hey it's everyone's favorite murder grandpa

Oh, look a new blouse

Pitch perfect whomst?

I love that for Bill it's never a question of alice being gay..it's never really that big of a deal. He just does not like deb

He even suggests other girls for alice

Its just really comforting for me to watch it be normalised so sweetly

Lah...dee...DAH. DAH. DAY?!

I will 100% believe this is the man behind the paul clones. He is so fucking unhinged look at him

🎶black coffee, I'm your coffee gal- NOOOOO!!!!!

He has to bend to half his height to meet her eye level i love them

Promise me you'll think about the implications!!

Jaime had no business being this hot during cup of poisoned coffee

They're constantly just holding hands or reaching out for each other it's too cute

YOU GRABBED THE WRONG ONE, YOU NOODLE!

The purest friendship

Ted casually jamming out to Robert's dance

[alien/turkey noises]

His brain fell out

Who is it? Professor hidgens! Don't lie to me whoever you are, I'm professor hidgens!

This is paul and...them

I'm going to...kick your...head

Iconic

Get you someone who looks at you the way paul looks at emma

Or even the way emma looks at paul really they're both equally soft

The biggest plot twist would have been if Paul had been the one to crash Jane's car

FUCK CLIVESDALE

So I guess I'm the supervillain? I don't think of you like that at all emma

I'm soft for them

Jaime i love u

Seriously her voice 😯

Jeff just jumping around while jaime sings like a goddess honestly same

Anyways paulkins are being all adorable in the background

I love how they're just screaming out for bill like fuck ted

I shot a charle-ton

Appreciate his jokes please

SING THE BEGINNING OF MOANA

The best starkid song honestly

Can we talk about how paul remembered most of the lines? Like emma and ted were just repeating whatever he said and bill was fucking singing the circle of life

Ted's voice cracking

I just realised he's sitting directly in front of charlotte's body and I know he's 90% an asshole but this fucking scene man

Like he cares just a little and we can all see it how he's trying to keep whats left of his friends from dying too

Honestly joey's acting here gets me

Height difference™

When he said "I respect her choices but..." I honestly initially thought some homophobic crap might follow but bill you absolute angel

He did not dissapoint

Bill Woodward 🤝 Steve harrington

If you get what I mean

(team i have no issue with you being a lesbian but please have better taste in girls)

Fancasting for denise or angela to play grace chastity in NPMD

Corey's expressions in this scene honestly breaks my heart

He just wanted to save his daughter 😔

prove it asshole, we're the army

he boop

WEAR A WATCH ⌚

I'm authorising you to use my firearm

Hidgens and mcnamara are both dramatic gays but with completely opposite energies

[foot sweep]

The way he skip-runs across the stage

Draco would be proud

For a 63 year old he can really work those hips

The audience losing their shit

Should I take this chair? I'll get the piano

The light slowly turning red as infected!mcnamara smiles

The audience slowly realising what the lyrics mean

Honestly iconic

One of my favorite moments in the show

So the last thing paul ever told emma was "byeeeee"?

Nah fuck that they both survived and are living happily in colorado running their pot farm

What ending?

The theatre being Paul's worst nightmare and starlight theatre being the place where he's killed, and starlight also being miss holloway's nightmare time? Methinks he might be her descendent of some sort

Watch out paul, he might kick your head

Mr. Davidson didn't want to be a mindless alien slave! He wanted to be choked by his wife!

Starkid stroking their villain takes a whole another level here huh

Jon slipping between normal talking to singing after every other word is pure talent

All jokes and paulkins related angst aside the ending is actually really amazing for a multitude of reasons

1. Inevitable is an absolute masterpiece of a song and it ties in all the previous songs that were there in the show

2. It provides context to the intro song (its all a fucking loop babey)

3. We get this one final moment of softness

4. Emma's scream perfectly harmonises with the ending of inevitable

5. It spectacularly breaks the 4th wall for the second time and integrates the audience as characters in the show

6. They never once break character through the whole thing

7. It proves once and for all that the hero of the story was never paul, it was emma. paul was just the final villain

That being said I am happily going back deep down in denial-town. You can find me drowning in a bucketload of paulkins fluff fics goodbye

89 notes · View notes

stacispratt · 3 years

Text

glorious fire

big thank u to @coffeebucko without whomst this fic would not exist <3 thank u for chatting with me about stacijacob & also putting your eyeballs on the first draft of this thing!! without further ado here’s jacob asking how staci would kill him as foreplay

also posted on ao3!

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

“When you fantasize about escaping,” Jacob says, as he looks up from his Chosens' reports to rest his eyes on Pratt's rigid form, “how do you do it?”

Pratt, sitting on Jacob's bed, in the middle of scribbling notes on his clipboard, only locks up stares at him. His eyes are wide, knuckles white, like he can’t believe Jacob is even asking— he thinks it’s a loyalty test. It’s as plain as day on his face. He stays quiet, manages to slip the pen into the top of the clipboard despite shaky hands. He's thinking up the perfect response, the perfect string of words to please Jacob, to make him secure in Pratt's loyalty. His fear.

That's not what he's looking for. Jacob’s not fucking stupid. No man in his right mind would think Pratt is loyal to him or Eden's Gate.

Silence sinks between them. The air sucks out of the room like a thunderstorm is about to break out, localized to just Jacob's bedroom, until Pratt looks like he might start to hyperventilate.

But Jacob Seed doesn’t repeat himself. He doesn’t ask again.

Instead, he sighs long and deep, and leans back in his chair. Looks back down to his records, though he doesn't read them. “When we were kids—Joseph, John, and me—we had some foster parents who worked us like dogs on their farm. Wouldn’t let us in the house, made us sleep in the barn." He taps his pen. "Beat us, too. Was doin’ my best to take the brunt of it, but one day I saw some bruises on John, even though he was just a damn baby.” Jacob pauses, glances over to Pratt, gauges his reaction. He's blank as stone, though there's something twitching in the corner of his mouth. Jacob hums once and sets his papers down. “So I burned the fucking barn down.”

He fixes his eyes decidedly on Pratt now, gaze hard and focused. Pratt's watching him back, like maybe he understands. Like maybe he knows better who Jacob is. What makes him tick, that— that what makes Jacob tick makes him tick, too.

“So, Peaches,” he says. “What barn are you burning?”

Pratt swallows so loud it clicks. Then he says, “I'd kill you while I shave your throat,” and Jacob smiles. He's not looking at Jacob anymore, he's staring at the floor— maybe the bloodstain on the unfinished concrete from when Jacob gave him the cut that now traces down the line of his cheek. His hands stay behind his back obediently, but his shoulders flex like maybe he's fiddling with his fingers. Weak, but Jacob can let it slide, so long as Pratt keeps outlining his escape plan. "And after– after you bleed out I'd disguise myself as a Chosen and escape."

Pratt's eyes fuzz out as he recalls his escape plan. It's not his realistic one, not a real plan. Jacob has seen him eye the weekly truck deliveries, sneak glances at the rotating guard schedule. Good. He's not stupid enough to tell Jacob his real plan. Just his favorite fantasy.

Jacob brings his hand to his face and rubs his mouth. "After. After I bleed out." He doesn't take his eyes off Pratt as his eyes rise from the floor to Jacob's face— first his finger perched on his lips, then to his eyes. He looks frightened, but not in the way he was at first. He doesn't look frightened of Jacob himself. More like he's frightened of his own thoughts, his own desires.

The thought has delight curling in Jacob's stomach.

"Yes," Pratt husks. "Yes, I have things to… to say."

An honest to God smile pulls up the corner of his mouth. Jacob is careful to cover it with his hand. "Like what?"

After a moment, Pratt says, "I guess you'll have to find out," his muscles tense like he's ready to bolt.

Jacob's smile widens into a grin. He fucking laughs. "Guess I will, Peaches," he croons, as he taps his finger to his lips, just once. "When you get the guts to dig in the knife, I guess I will." He hesitates, smile fading, then prompts, "Show me how you'd do it."

Pratt's jaw closes so tightly the muscle visibly flexes. Controlling himself, his gut reaction, but right after he does, he pries his mouth open and chokes out, "How I'd—?"

"Kill me," Jacob finishes for him, as he stands and comes around his desk. His arms fall to his sides, while Pratt's come up to his chest defensively. Jacob only hums and tugs his desk's metal chair into the center of the room. Over the old blood stain. "Come here."

He waits until Pratt steps forward to sit, then unsheathes his hunting knife from its holster on his thigh and offers it over his shoulder without looking.

Pratt hesitates for a heartbeat, then all at once swipes the knife from Jacob and presses it near instantly to his throat. Not hard, though— he'll need to press harder to kill Jacob.

But he never will.

Of course he won't. Jacob knows Pratt, and he won't. He'll never kill Jacob. He doesn't have it in him.

That's why he's never done it before when shaving Jacob. That's why he didn't do it in front of the Deputy. That's why he won't do it now. That's why it's only something Pratt thinks about late at night, lying on the dirt in a cage outside, when nightmares keep him awake.

Pratt takes a shuddering breath. Jacob tips his chin up in offering. He pulls the knife in toward him, and there's just enough bite to tell Jacob that Pratt actually managed to nick him. Warmth trickles down through the stubble on his throat and settles in the dip of his collarbone.

Jacob clucks. "Not a bad spot, if you'd actually make the slice." He grabs hold of Pratt's wrist and yanks the blade up his throat— hard enough that he can feel the skin go red and irritated, with blood vessels burst just under his first layer of skin. Pratt's hand trembles under his, flutters around the knife handle. "But you won't have any time to whine and cry at me if you get my artery. You'd have to cut…" he trails off for a moment while he guides Pratt's hand through the killing motion, glides the knife oh-so-gently across his vulnerable throat. "Just here if you want time to watch the light leave my eyes, Peaches."

Pratt's breath hitches audibly. Jacob adds, "Would even leave me the air to give you a little conversation, if you like." When there's no response, Jacob drops his hand to his lap and prompts, "Your turn, Pratt. Make the fucking cut."

Pratt still doesn't speak. Jacob insists, "Escape. Don't you want to? Don't you want to crawl to the Whitetails, beg and plead them to help you now that you've killed the Big Bad Wolf?"

The knife rocks against his throat as Pratt readjusts his grip. There's more pressure against his skin for just a moment, almost enough to make him bleed again, and then Pratt lifts the blade away from him, drops it to the floor, and steps back.

Jacob lets Pratt feel the silence for a few heartbeats. Then he stands, retrieves his knife, and straightens his back to look at Pratt. He doesn't smile this time, just steps forward to Pratt's figure, still as stone, and gently pinches his jaw between his thumb and first two fingers.

He doesn't speak until Pratt's damp eyes rise to meet his.

"You understand, don't you?" he murmurs. "You're a smart boy." Pratt nods, jerky as if he's controlled by broken machinery. Jacob strokes his jaw with the tip of his pointer finger. "Good. You're mine. And nobody else in this county— no Whitetail, no Hope County Cougar, no piece of their Resistance— is ever going to take care of you the way I do."

They breathe together for a few moments. Pratt's eyes have fallen shut, though tears still glisten at the corners and along his lashes. Jacob thinks absently how he wants to make Pratt cry until there's no more tears left in him— until there's no horror left worse than anything he's already felt.

"There's nothing for you out there," Jacob says. Promises. Reassures. "There's only me."

Pratt doesn't say a word, but Jacob hears him all the same:

Only you.

Jacob lingers. Strokes his thumb over Pratt's lip.

Pratt opens his eyes at the sensation, stares up with those wide brown eyes— Jacob exhales softly and sinks down to press their lips together. Slides his thumb out of the way just in time, drags the corner of Pratt's mouth down as he slots their lips together. Pratt's breath shakes out of him. Jacob swallows it up.

"Staci," he murmurs, and clenches his hands on Pratt's hip and the back of his neck when he shudders in response. Jacob holds him steady, no longer kissing him, though their lips still brush. He doesn't move. He waits for Pratt.

Who takes one more halted, shivery breath, then steps abruptly back from Jacob. He dips his head to escape Jacob's hold on his neck, then just stands there, three feet from him. Jacob hums. Runs his hand over his beard and rubs his knuckle into his chin. "Staci," he repeats, and it instantly draws Pratt's eyes to his— Jacob's never used his first name until now, and it's having just the effect Jacob hoped it would. He holds his gaze and doesn't move closer. Lets Pratt keep his distance. "We're all we can rely on. That's why we cull the herd. That's why we need to train them."

Pratt stares at him. Jacob can see the cogs turning in his mind. Can see him grinding up the we, trying to process it. Make it digestible.

"Together," Jacob adds, without looking away. After a moment, he steps forward, pats Pratt's cheek, then steps to the door and twists the handle. "Bring me a report on the Bliss supplies by ten. See you tonight, Peaches."

Alone in Jacob's bedroom, Staci brushes his middle finger over the developing scar on his right cheek. He follows it down to his mouth, and presses his first knuckle to his lips.

Staci, Jacob says in his mind, Together.

#stacijacob #fc5 #staci pratt #jacob seed #my fic #had tons of fun writing this ngl i missed them so so much

31 notes · View notes

thatringboy · 3 years

Text

@yokelish @yoruzumy0 hey bitches, may I present to you:

It Takes Two

1,960 words - Fluff

Summary: Xiao and Hu Tao decide to open the Memory of Dust

Read it under the cut!

Xiao considered himself to be pleasantly distanced from most humans. He interacted with Qiqi of Bubu Pharmacy sometimes and he considered the Traveler from another world a nice companion. However, he had no excuse for why he spent his down time with the director of the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor as much as he did.

Nor did he have an excuse for why they had broken into Zhongli’s apartment and were rifling through his things.

“Director Hu,” he hissed as she opened up a dresser drawer and began searching what seemed to be a shirt drawer. “I put up with many of your antics, but this is going too far.”

She pulled her head up and her red eyes glowed mischievously. “But, Sir Alatus, you were the one with a key to the front door.”

“YOU PUNCHED IN THE WINDOW!”

“Tsk tsk, too many details. Now, help me find juicy things to hold over Mr. Zhongli’s head so that I can keep him from accepting commissions somewhere else. He’s too good for my business to lose.”

Xiao wasn't sure how to explain that the ex-archon had no plans to stop working at the funeral parlor and watched Tao shut the drawer and move to a small wooden desk covered in papers.

“Ooh, this is a fancy paperweight!” She lifted up a strangely shaped rock that glowed with Geo energy.

The adepti crossed the room and examined it. “It looks like a puzzle. Perhaps like that multi-colored cube Yanfei owns?”

Tao tossed the rock between her hands and looked over the ways the different rocks hooked together. This was child’s play for her. She could solve it in an hour tops. “Do you think he hides candy in here?”

Xiao took the puzzle and turned it over. His immortal eyes could easily pick out where the rocks needed to slide to unlock the center. “I believe the Lord of Geo would hold much more valuable things within this… whatever it is than sweets.”

She snatched it back and began fiddling with the locks and stone clasps. “Mr. Zhongli won’t be back from Ghuili Assembly until night, wanna find out?”

As much as the yaksha wanted to protest, the pleading look on Tao’s face and his own curiosity (which he blamed on Barbatos’ influence) won. They sat down on the floor and took turns sliding and unlocking parts of the strange stone. With each twist, the orange energy inside grew brighter and brighter.

It took them maybe thirty minutes to work a hole large enough in the stone to find the center. As Tao slid the last rock into place, the entire contraption began to vibrate and shot out of her hands. She squealed and Xiao’s hand shot out to pull his spear into existence. The sphere spun around in the air above them and became engulfed in the glow of pure Geo magic.

“What in Rex Lapis?” Xiao whispered and shielded his eyes from the light.

Tao grabbed Xiao’s spear arm and shook him violently while pointing at the floating thing. “Look, Gao-Xiao, look! It’s a person!”

“Huh?”

He opened his eyes and sure enough, the rock had vanished and where it had been floating now stood a young woman with long silky hair and a beautiful robe with billowing sleeves. She opened her eyes and Xiao was taken aback by how much the color resembled the petals of a Glaze Lily.

She blinked a few times and looked around. When she spoke, her words were soft and filled Tao’s heart with nostalgia like she had never experienced before. “May I ask where I am?”

Tao cleared her throat and let go of the adepti next to her. “You’re in, uh, Liyue Harbor?”

The woman smiled and turned her eyes to Xiao. “It is good to see you, Xiao. Do you remember me?”

He felt his throat go dry. Xiao let his weapon disappear and fell to his knees before her, biting his tongue to keep himself from making any noises. “My lady.”

She snorted playfully and tugged on his hair to make him stand back up. “Get up, you drama queen, since when have I ever required you to be so formal? So where is he? I do not feel Morax’s presence here.”

Tao reached over and tugged on her sleeve. “Yeah, hi, I’m Tao. I’m the director of the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor? Whomst are you?”

“My name is Guizhong, my little peach.” Her eyes were as soft as silk.

Hu Tao’s jaw dropped dramatically as her words came out as sputters. Xiao got back to his feet with wide eyes.

“But how can you be here? You…”

“Died? Yeah, that happens sometimes.” Guizhong fluffed her hair with a smirk. “Anyways, where’s Morax? I need to ask him why it took him almost four thousand years to unlock the Memory of Dust.”

“He’s, umm, Rex Lapis is out today. We are the ones that freed you, Lady Guizhong. Were you trapped in there for over three thousand years?” Xiao cocked his head to the side.

The god looked around again. “That seems to be the case, yes. I put a piece of my soul inside the Memory of Dust as a failsafe in case anything happened to me during the Archon War. So tell me, Xiao, what all has happened in my absence? Why are you not accompanied by the other yakshas?”

Xiao rocked back and forth on his heels uncomfortably and didn’t meet her eyes. Hu Tao stepped over and linked her arm in Guizhong’s. “I’m not sure I know everything that happened, but I can at least tell you what happened in the past month or so!”

~~~~~ “What a splendid meal! I swear, Mister Zhongli, we should enjoy such fine dining more often!” Childe wiped his face on a silk napkin with a wide smile.

Zhongli nodded and reached into his pocket to retrieve his wallet to pay for the food, but stopped. “Oh, well, this is certainly awkward now.”

“No Mora again? I took you for a working man.” The Harbinger winked and pulled out his own wallet. “You are lucky to be dining with someone as generous as myself.”

Childe leaned across the table and his voice dropped tremendously. “And of course, you understand what I require in return.”

Zhongli shook his head. “I’m not fighting you.”

The younger man laughed and fell back in his seat. “Such stubbornness! Oh how I wish to beat it out of you!”

“Perhaps I could treat you to some quality tea and more chopstick-using lessons instead?” The ex-Archon felt himself grinning.

Childe’s smile only grew. “Deal!”

The walk back to Zhongli’s apartment was pleasant. Zhongli quite enjoyed all of Childe’s stories from his childhood in Snezhnaya and because he was no longer duty bound to Liyue as its Archon, he silently promised to one day visit the icy country of the North.

However, all pleasantries fell away when they approached the front door and noticed that a window was smashed, the sound of conversation floating out into the air of the night. Childe smirked and pulled out his swords. “Looks like I’ll get my fight after all!”

Zhongli recognized one of the voices, but he couldn't place it. He pulled his key out of his coat pocket and unlocked the door quietly. They slipped inside and looked around for the intruders. However, Zhongli froze when he caught sight of who sat at his dinner table without a care in the world.

“And then, after this guy almost floods the entire city, Zhongli still asks him out to dinner!” Hu Tao laughed.

Xiao crossed his arms and grumbled from across the table. “It is as they say, ‘love is blind’.”

“I for one think this Childe man sounds pleasant. He certainly isn't any more dangerous than Morax’s other exes.” The second woman giggled.

Zhongli dropped his keys as Childe slipped behind him. “What’s this? A party for us?”

The yaksha gasped and jumped to his feet, bowing lowly at the hip. “My lord! Forgive the intrusion! I shall repair your window at once!”

Tao coughed loudly from her seat. “Simp.”

Guizhong slid out of her seat gracefully and stood before Zhongli. “Hey there, old timer.”

He crossed the distance between them and engulfed her in a hug. “Are you really here?

“Uh… yes? My question is why did it take you three thousand and seven hundred years to unlock the Memory of Dust?!” She hugged him back, but gave him a wicked pinch.

He let go and looked around. “It was an impossible puzzle--”

Xiao rubbed the back of his neck. “Director Hu and I solved it in half an hour.”

“And out popped the pretty god!” Tao grabbed a cup of tea from the table and downed it in a single gulp. “Oh, hi twink!”

“Hi yourself, shortie!” Childe waved at her from the doorway. “Anyways, can someone introduce me to this lovely woman here?”

She moved a gaping Zhongli out of her way to shake Childe’s hand. “Hi, I’m Guizhong!”

“Guizhong? As in the God of Dust? Nice to meet you, I’m Childe, but I also go by Tartaglia!”

Hu Tao moved over to Xiao and pinched his elbow, prompting him to hand her three Mora. “I told you they would hit it off.”

Guizhong turned back to Zhongli to see a tear streaking down his cheek. She frowned and grabbed his arm. “Oh no, Morax! Don't be sad! I’m back!”

“I’m not sad…” He examined every inch of her face. How could he had forgotten how kind her eyes were? “This may be the happiest day of my life.”

Childe cleared his throat loudly. “So… about that tea and those lessons you promised me?”

The ex-Archon remembered his existence. “Oh, right, my apologies, Childe. Do you still wish to learn how to use chopsticks?”

Guizhong gasped loudly. “You don't know how to use chopsticks?! It’s a good thing that I’m a god of wisdom! Xiao, get in that kitchen and find us some pairs to use at once!”

The adepti gulped and moved to follow her orders. “Yes ma’am.”

Childe was dragged to the table by the woman with the large sleeves and forcefully sat down. Xiao returned with chopsticks and Hu Tao took the seat next to him with a large smile.

As Guizhong began her instructions, Zhongli watched the scene unfold with deep emotions in his eyes. He had fantasised for centuries about what the Memory of Dust held within - that perhaps it was some sort of parting wisdom from his oldest friend, but this? Having a piece of her soul be trapped within it, waiting for him to unlock it?

He chuckled to himself, of course it would. That was how Guizhong’s fantastic mind worked.

“Forgive my interruption, but how did you two unlock the Memory of Dust? I tried and failed for almost four thousand years to solve the puzzle.” He glanced at his desk where the contraption would have sat.

Guizhong’s laugh was like bells ringing in his ears. “Morax, you old fool, you simply needed two people to solve it. To acknowledge that you need assistance is the most wise thing a person can do.”

Zhongli sat down in an empty chair and watched Childe drop his chopsticks to crack his knuckles. “Then I see that even I still have much to learn from you. I take it you will be returning to Juyuin Karst?”

She snorted. “Oh gods no! I’m staying with you, partner! You think I can afford to travel around whenever I want to? In this economy? No sir, you’ve just got yourself a new roommate and you can blame little Conqueror of Demons and your boss for that!”

#Hu Tao and Childe continue to be moods #fanfic #fanfiction #fluff #genshin impact #Zhongli #Hu Tao #Xiao #Childe #Guizhong

48 notes · View notes

jangofctts · 4 years

Text

Don’t Push Your Luck (Boba Fett x Reader)

Rated: Explicit

Word Count: 4.9k wooF

Warnings: smut, language, handjobs, oral (male receiving), fingering, heavy petting, there is SOFT. I REPEAT SOFT FLUFF. but only SOME

Chapter (1), (2)

a/n: hey y’all...welcome...finally this bITCH IS OUT. thanks to @djxrxn WHOMST HAVE BEEN THE MAIN MOTIVATOR BEHIND THIS. I LOVE YOU SO MUCH 💖🥵🤠

(also lmk if you wanna be tagged or just wanna YELL at me)

It’s impossible not to count down the days, the hours, the seconds leading up to your untimely end. A sleep cycle and half to be exact. A perfect amount of time to finish counting each loose wire and rusty screw holding together this heap of junk—a miracle really, that it’s able to jump to hyperspace, let alone fly.

You’re no expert on the inner workings of a spacecraft, but your familiarity with Imperial grade cruisers gift you the impeccable skill of deducing that the hiss of air every couple minutes out of the hydraulic piping is not ideal. Nor is the solar light overhead that flickers and hums, skirting the precarious line of exploding in your face or simply plunging the cargo hold into murky darkness.

At this point you’d take either.

You sigh, resting the back of your head against the wall as the barbed tendrils of an oncoming headache settles behind your eyes.

Between that, the stupid light, and your boredom; it’s enough to make anyone stir crazy. Stars—even the arduous task of talking to Boba Fett is morphing into something akin to craving. Even if his idea of a conversation runs parallel to the art of smug, male pride and snide words meant to pick and prod—it’s better than whatever this is.

Scoffing, you curl your knees up to your chest and rest your chin over your knee. This is pathetic.

You should despise him—feel like kicking his teeth in—or helmet—whatever. He aided in the killing of you friend—probably took care of all the other poor souls who even dared to breathe your way too. Boba Fett is a despicable, no good bounty hunter who finds far too much fun in the misfortune of others.

And yet…

The task of attaching your hate to the man is proving to be more difficult than you would’ve guessed. You don’t regret what you’ve done with him—far from it in fact—but your tolerance, bordering enjoying his company, is concerning. To say in the least.

Nothing good will come out of the conflicted ball of knots that settle in your chest, ensnaring your heartstrings into that endless monstrosity.

Though none of it stops the way your chest constricts, heart skipping a few vital beats at the familiar sound of his spurs resonate through the ship. They chink against the metal pegs of the ladder, boots settling on the ground with a heavy thump. A moment later Boba steps into your line of sight, tattered cloak and chipped armor in all its battered glory.

He isn’t an immanent threat, but your eyes still track each movement. The rational part of you knows he won’t lash out, but you’re still his quarry and even a wolf with a severed head has the power to bite. No part of you wants to brave the sharp points of his teeth.

Not even a fraction of his attention is thrown your way as he does his routine inspections of your fellow captured quarries, frozen in their carbonite prisons. You just hope none of them spontaneously reanimate—you’re not too keen on another shipmate. Your little corner is crowded as is and forget sharing your blanket. It’s tattered and smells like dust and mothballs and you have a sneaking suspicion it’s just one of Boba’s old cloaks he outgrew—but you’re thankful for it anyhow.

You flinch as he punches in a code, the loud grate of metal on metal piercing your ears as the carbonite slabs swing back into their storage space. With an incline of his head, his weighted gaze settles on your person.

“Still nervous?”

You sniff and shake your head. “You just…startled me is all.”

Boba snorts in disbelief and pads closer. He reaches the toes of your boots and squats, one gloved forearm resting over his knee as the other reaches out to capture a lock of your hair. He twirls it between his fingers and gently tugs, quiet as he studies you behind the visor. The action is familiar—doesn’t scare you as much as it once did, but his closeness still overwhelms.

“I see you’ve found some courage, gentle Rabbit,” he surmises, untangling his fingers from your hair to tap beneath your chin. “While we’re at it…any last favors I can provide?”

It’s whiplash—so stupefying it renders your tongue speechless, a heated blush rushing up your cheeks and to the tip of your ears. He snickers and shakes his head, rocking back onto his heels to stand as you sputter for words.

It’s a joke—a garbage one at your expense. Always at the butt-end of things with no room to snap back. Yet, as he turns on his heel to return to the cockpit—it’s the perfect opportunity. Not the sort of favor he’d be expecting, but a favor nonetheless.

“Can I—“ He pauses and casts a glance over his shoulder as you muster enough bravery to follow through. “Do you think I could—could sit in the cockpit? Just for a little while…”

It’s a long-shot—like launching a flimsy javelin at a target no larger than a thumbtack three thousand clicks away. Not happening—more likely to beat a rancor in a fucking wrestling match then sway the bounty hunter’s opinion. Regardless, the question must stun him—the terse silence drags on for an agonizing amount of time, amping up your anxiety tenfold.

“I’m sorry—I just—I wanted to see the stars one last time,” you mumble, curling into yourself with a wince. “It’s stupid—“

“It’s hyperspace—not much to look at.” He curtly interrupts. “An asteroid if you’re lucky.”

Your spirits plummet further—scraping against the dirt like a crashed speeder geared to the highest velocity and headed straight for a brick wall. Maker this was dumb—

“The second you try anything funny—“

You perk up, your spine straightening as he turns swiftly on his heel and marches back. He leans down at the waist, firmly ensnaring your chin between his forefinger and thumb, straining the muscles in your neck. “—you’ll end up in there.”

He jerks his head over his shoulder at the carbonfreezer. Yeah. No thank you. Absolutely zero interest in becoming a human popsicle.

“You won’t even notice I’m there,” you breathe, holding your stare steady. “Promise.”

Boba hums in thought, releases your chin and pats your cheek. He straightens and taps at his vambraces and with a hiss of air the stasis cuffs around your wrists clatter to the floor. You stand and sigh, rubbing at the angry raised lines, just shy from a dark bruise.

The bounty hunter ushers you towards the ladder, his hand anchored to your shoulder. You stop yourself from scoffing. The action is useless—you’ve got no clever scheme up your sleeve or malicious motive but you can never be too cautious you suppose—not with this line of work.

You try not to snoop once you clamber up into the second level—but Maker—it’s interesting. There’s a small bunk on the other end of the short corridor, messy blankets thrown on top and a deconstructed blaster that’s seen better days. Gray and off-white undershirts hang off the metal rigging on the bunk and the sight of his laundry is undoubtedly jarring. It’s silly not to think he doesn’t do laundry but—imagining the most feared bounty hunter in the Galaxy washing his tidy whities is hilarious.

“Come on,” Boba urges, nudging your shoulder with his own.

Your tiny smile never falters as he leads you into the domed cockpit, the neon blue of hyperspace reflecting across his chipped armor with miniature streaks of light. He gestures at the co-pilot’s seat tucked beside the com board, a litany of buttons blinking and flashing as you gingerly sit.

The hinges squeak as the chair spins, your eye catching the mess of beaded and jeweled necklaces that hang on a tiny hook above the board. You recognize a few—Kashyykian ceremonial beads, the glittering coil of pure, refined diamonds from Pantora and the braided strands of bantha leather common on Tatooine. Your fingers drift up and thumb at the carved wooden Wroshyr beads.

Trophies—

“Don’t touch those.”

You jump and yank your hand back. “So...all I can do is...sit?”

“Isn’t that what you asked for?”

You have to agree—there isn’t much to look at. Hyperspace, as fascinating as it is, looses its charm once the vertigo sets in. To be honest—you weren’t expecting to get this far.

Oh well.

A change in scenery is always nice. Different loose wires and screws to count…

And the seat spins. Score.

Boba however, does not share in your bemused sentiments. Your mopey sighing and the constant squeak of loose bearings on your spinny chair is not pleasant to the ear, apparently.

“If you’re that bored, Rabbit,” he sighs, casting a sharp glance over his shoulder. “You could always put those hands to work.”

You pause and swipe a finger through the dust between the toggles on the comm board and absentmindedly respond. “I don’t think I’d be much help. I’m not very technically inclined and oh—“

Your cheeks flush when he tilts his head. “You, uh...didn��t mean that sort of work, did you?”

Boba snorts and crosses his ankle over his knee and rests his helmet on the headrest. The stretched out figure of his body is alluring—fascinating to studying each nick and scratch on his armor without the repercussions of him staring back. His vambraces clink against his cuirass as he laces his fingers together, resting his hands just above his codpiece.

“Do you need something, Rabbit?”

You swallow, your eyes flicking back up to a more respectable place for them to linger. “Um..n-no. I’m fine. Just…”

He rolls his head to the side, the shadows from hyperspace carving out the sharp lines of his helmet into an even deeper dramatic cut. You squirm and focus your eyes on the frayed laces of your boots.

“It’s alright. You can tell me, sweet girl.” His goads, tempting you out onto that slippery slope of desire.

He uncross his legs and uses the tip of his boot to languidly spin himself around, his knees spread wide in a display of mock easiness. Boba’s thumbs drum against his ammo belt, the quiet, rhythmic tap…tap…tap…the only sound filling the charged silence. It’s the Academy all over again; sat down and scrutinized until you crack—spill every secret until they’re satisfied— and Boba Fett is no different…

You scramble for words, wrangling your thoughts into something somewhat comprehensive. “I’m—I—well—“

He cocks his head, light bouncing off the silvery pockmark on his helmet. Boba’s hand idly travels lower, brushes off imaginary dust on his thigh and settles his fingers over the clasps to this codpiece. His thumb flicks it open then closed, all too keen on where your eyes are glued to.

“You want your hands on my cock again? Is that it?” Boba purrs in amusement. You tongue passes over your lip as you wrench your eyes off of him yet again.

“There’s no need to be play coy, girl,” Boba snickers, “Tell me.”

The words jump out of your mouth—no forethought and apparently not an ounce of self control. “Yes—I want...to p-put my hands on you.”

“On me or my cock?”

You mouth goes dry as you mumble out a feeble agreement. “Your…cock.”

Boba huffs in self satisfaction. “Come here then.”

On already shaky legs you stumble out of your seat and plant yourself in front of him. You have no visual confirmation but the hair-raising sensations as his eyes rake down your body sends shivers up your spine.

Your mouth parts, but before you’re even able to ask what he wants—he beats you to it.

“Your choice, Rabbit.”

Not helpful, you think.

Regardless of the lack of direction, you chew on the inside of your cheek and slowly lower yourself onto your knees, sliding easily between his parted legs. The only indication you know he’s aware you’re there is a quick shift of his hips, settling further into the leather cushion.

His leg jumps involuntarily as your fingers skim up his knee. If you weren’t interested in receiving a lovely black eye, you’d have the nerve to accuse him of being ticklish.

Biting the corner of your lip to stave off your coy smile, your hand continues its path up along his inner thigh. There’s a short huff of air that filters through the vocoder as your fingertips reach the codpiece. They brush over the circular dent left by a blaster, curiosity piqued at the strange location.

You want to ask—but—the thought is fleeting, far more interested in finding the tiny clasps on the side that easily pop open, the offending piece of armor going lax in your grip. You toss it to the side with little hesitation, greeted by the firm outline of his cock filling out the front of his trousers.

Boba Fett is not a patient man and your lecherous gawking, enough to notice, irks him. With a grunt he snakes his fingers around your hand and presses it against his cock. He rolls his hips, guiding your hand into applying a firmer touch until you’re palming him without the extra help. You give the hardening flesh a rougher squeeze, a bolt of liquid heat settling in the pit of your stomach as a stifled moan reaches your ears.

By the time your hand sweeps up to ease off the heavy ammo belt around his waist, the bulge in his pants is considerable—a fucking pain to maneuver around as you tug down his trousers into a dramatic ‘v’. Boba’s hand, hanging off the arm rest, jerks the moment your fingertips brush along the dark curls, trailing up and taking a hold of his cock with a careful grip.

He’s heavy in your hand, thicker than the circumference of your forefinger and thumb pressed together, and harder than kriffing durasteel. You can feel his watchful gaze carve a burning path over the contours of your face, drifting to where you hold him.

He grumbles an inaudible complaint under his breath, curling his fists by his sides. Despite his obvious irritation with your feathery touches, he lets you continue without so much as a grumpy sigh or snippy redirection. You preen at the small victory, delighted you’re able to explore before the short rope of his patience runs thin and snaps.

A sharp hiss of hair passes through the vocoder as you lightly tug on his cock, mesmerized by the firmness and the searing heat beneath your palm. From the base up you pull, fixed upon the dark flesh, flushed and pulsing as wetness pools at the tip as you pull down the foreskin, exposing the entirety of the wide head.

With your thumb you spread the bead of liquid around, intent on continuing your little exploratory endeavor until Boba shifts and grumbles out an order to stop.

“Not like that,” he huffs, laying his fingers over yours that hold his cock. “Harder.”

A fiery blush licks at your cheeks as he squeezes both sets of fingers into a firm fist, leading your hand into the pace he desires.

It’s rough, much firmer than you’d think would be pleasurable—but you oblige. The wetness that dribbles from the flushed tip lessens the friction but with quick lick over your palm, he glides easily in your hand. Boba’s head rolls back against the headrest, exposing a sliver of brown skin beneath the lip of his helmet.

It’s not long before your wrist aches—just shy of a couple moments. Luckily enough for you and your poor hand musculature, it doesn’t take more than a handful of minutes—rough and with no real discernible technique other than just fucking into your fist. Boba’s knee jerks as he lifts his head and arches his hips, chest heaving with shallow inhales.

“Take it in your—in your mouth,” he orders in a rough rasp. His chest heaves as his hand finds purchase in your hair, jerking your head closer to his cock. It stings—Maker, why does he pull so hard?

With a huff, you listen and part your lips. The tip of his cock slips into your heated mouth, twitching as your tongue rolls against the small slit leaking a near continuous stream of precum. With a couple short tugs and a gentle suck around the head, his fist clenches tight and drags you further down his shaft.

You gag around him, a low grunt rattling through his diaphragm as he cums. It’s warm, thick and fills your mouth, but the heavy weight on the back of your head leaves you no other choice than to swallow. Boba curses, cock still twitching when he lets you up and pulls out of your mouth. You gasp for precious air as you wipe off your lips with your sleeve, sparring a look up at the bounty hunter.

The reclined figure of his body molds into the chair, a strip of dark skin peeking out from beneath the cowl has his head rests back against the seat. His fingers twitch when you shift, squirming as the twisting heat in your lower stomach festers and grows.

You watch his throat bob as he speaks, “If you want something...take it.”

The hard enamel of your teeth cut into your bottom lip as you carefully rock forward, dragging yourself off the ground. It takes a moment to shuck off your pants and perch yourself over his knees after shimming his trousers further down his legs. Boba only bothers to look up with lazy interest once your cunt, soaked and smeared over your inner thighs presses against his upper legs, wetting the muscled limbs.

You steel your nerves against the sharp analytical gaze through the carved lines of his vizor and give your hips a tentative roll along the length of his softening cock. For all you know he could be asleep—yet you have a sneaking suspicion as to what his eyes are glued to. You’re no idiot.

Boba’s gloved fingertips skim up your thigh, tempted to go higher but instead they drop back onto the armrests. You chew the inside of your lip, shooing away the urge to frown. Whatever—dwelling upon the quick movement is best left in the dark.

He sucks in a sharp breath of air as you rock your hips for a second time, your slick folds gliding smoothly along his member. It’s a light pressure, no more than a gentle caress so as not to overwhelm—but nonetheless still pleasurable, sating that untamable fire that burns bright in your belly.

Your eyes drift back to those white gloves, his fists balled and stationary on the armrest. You want them on you. You want to feel his callouses scrape over your skin—one last craving you need to put an end to.

It’s a risk—a big one. Yet, throwing your worries out the window is easier than your indecisiveness.

Both your hands slowly crawl over the white gloves, cautious in pulling them off as if he were some rabid Nexu ready to bite. He is, in a way and your sneaky little ploy certainly does not go unnoticed.

Boba jerks his hands up the arm rests. “What makes you think you’re allowed to touch me?”

His tone is scathing—knocks you so far off that small pedestal of bravery you’ve mustered and leaves you wilting. You should’ve known, stopped while you were ahead. Though knowing in the back your mind that something like this would happen, doesn’t take away from the razor sharp embarrassment that cuts through your chest.

Your forearm shoots up to rub away the burning itch of tears that threaten to fall, your head turning away in a mixture of shame and regret. Stupid—

You’re about to retreat, slide off his lap like a miserable pile of goo, but the delicate touch on your chin, coaxing you to face him startles you. Even more so when he tugs at the offending glove and brushes a bare finger down your cheek, a mere whisper against your skin. “You have a soft heart.”

Your heart leaps into your throat, your pulse roaring in your ears as he slips the other glove off, settling one of his bare hands over the swell of your hip while the other tentatively slip between your legs and presses against your clit. You gasp and arch into the light touch, your thighs involuntarily jerking as he increases the pressure.

He trades his hold on your hip to slide his hand into your shirt, palming and kneading your breast through your bra as you roll and whine against his fingers. The tight circles he's drawing over your clit burns through your abdomen, drags you closer to the precipice that you’re all ready so close to. You whine his name as wicked heat licking up your body and spreading to each limb. You arch into him and with a firm hand, he parts your soaking cunt and thrusts two of his fingers inside, grinding the heel of his palm into the little bundle of nerves.

With a chuckle his hand leaves your shirt to pull you against his chest, the vocoder rumbling against your ear. “Good little Rabbit—cum on my fingers.”

Your body seizes as white hot heat sears through your core. Stars, brighter than a dying sun burst behind your eyes, a long whine filtering past your lips as shake and fall apart in his arms, your cunt clenching tight around his fingers.

You whine as he pulls out, little aftershocks of pleasure wracking through your body after your euphoric high. You’re barely conscious of your actions as he lifts your head and pushes his digits, coated in your juices into your mouth. You lick them clean, tasting the tang of your own arousal and the salt on his skin. With a satisfied hum, he slips them out, allowing your head to finally rest against his chest.

His hands are warm around your hips, tracing little patterns into the exposed skin—so light you’re sure you’re imagining it. You chide yourself—there’s no space for these kind of things. Not now.

The beskar is an uncomfortable thing to lay your cheek on—cold too—yet his soft sigh convinces you to stay put. Just for another second, suspended in a strange intimacy that neither of you should be dipping your toes into.

A gentle hush encompasses the cockpit, lulling you into a light doze. Though as your eyes struggle to stay open, the subtle inhale before a sentence is spoken keeps them from shutting. You wonder if he’ll muster the courage to speak or if he’ll let the words settle back into that lake teeming with uncovered mysteries and things better left unsaid.

“What would you do...” The beginning of his words tapers off as if he could pretend you wouldn’t hear it. It’s low, almost...uncertain. Well, as uncertain as Boba Fett could be with a head so full of his arrogance and pride.

His fingers drift higher up your back, ghostlike and teasingly soft.You hate the goosebumps that are left in the wake of his bare fingertips crawling up your spine. Swallowing, your fingernail taps at the chipped paint and circles the little brand on his cuirass. “Do what?”

He doesn’t answer right away—chewing on his words like they’ve stuck to the roof of his mouth and don’t intend to leave. He shifts and you’re afraid he’s about to shove you off his lap and storm away, but all he does is clear his throat and settle a palm on your upper back. “If I...if I let you go. What would you do?”

Your brows furrow, your heart kicking up into a rapid flurry of panic. That’s not fair—that’s not fair of him to say. You look up, your own twisted features staring back at you in the muted spectrum of blacks and grays in his visor. This is a joke—another one of his games to push you over the edge while he gets to bask in his idea of proclaimed hilarity. “That’s not funny.”

“It’s not supposed to be.”

You ball your hand into a fist as a tidal wave of resentment, followed with chilly anguish washes over you. Your head spins and battles with opposing opinions and reasons why he should just go through with delivering you to his employer. Be done with it and get his moneys worth without any consequence.

And yet, there’s a minuscule part of you, sprouting away from the dark cloud of inevitability, that wonders. Wonders if you should fight—convince him you deserve to live, untangle you from the disastrous web the Empire has cast around your limbs with no hope of escape. You sigh and shut your eyes.

“I’d never escape from the Empire even if you did,” you murmur. “The only time I’d be free is if I were dead.”

<><><><><><><><>

He promised himself that this would never happen.

Never let his own desires and emotions interfere with a job.

It’s irresponsible, bad for business and frankly quite stupid. This could cost him his credibility, his credits, his life.

You don’t double cross your employer—it’s the first rule of business that even a child would understand.

Boba Fett is cunning and clever; always one step ahead of his enemies. Always methodical, refusing to leave any loose ends that even hint at coming back around to bite him in the ass. He’s convinced himself that a will of iron is necessary—the only way to survive and to grow stronger than those who’ve hurt him—bested him in the game of life.

Cold, methodical, a legend.

And you…

You are soft. Gentle and too kind for someone to be caught up in this sort of mess. He shouldn’t be delivering you to Death’s doorstep in exchange for credits. You should be off living on some remote planet, far out of the reaches of the Empire. Away from him. Billions of miles from his bloody fingertips that stain your skin like black ink against a white canvas.

But you’ve made your choices and he’s made his.

And none of it soothes the festering storm, with winds more forceful than those on Kamino, that rattle through his ribcage. It tears through his sternum, cuts through the beskar and leaves an open wound—raw and tender that grows tenfold the second your eyes land on him.

You don’t beg when he hoists you up from the floor, no blubbering tears or last minute bargains to spare your life. Not even as you both reach the loading ramp, one mere tap of the button that would reveal you both to the man waiting on the landing platform. One button and he’d be free of you. You’re braver than most.

He’ll give you that.

He shouldn’t have said anything—saved himself from the steady ache that comes with having to look you in the eye. Drives a stake so deep into his chest the second you spare him a precious smile that twinkles like unrefined coaxium and thank him. You’re thanking him for the barest amount of kindness he offered to you on your last days of life.

Boba isn’t sure who he hates more; himself or you.

He must be staring too long—committing each soft slope and contour of your cheeks, the freckles, your softly parted lips, to memory—because the gentle nudge to his arm startles him.

“I’ll be alright,” you grin. You make a poor impression of a blaster with your finger and thumb and mimic the sound of it firing. “One shot to the head and I’m gone.”

“I know how blasters work.”

You shrug and glance at his hand that hovers over the button. “Then why are you hesitating?”

The million credit answer. One that you both know the answer to.

“Because you won’t be dying. Not today and not while I’m still alive.”

<><><><><><><><><><><>

The outfit is garish.

Too white.

Too clean.

A color that deceives his true nature and masks what he truly is— a viper laying in wait for unsuspecting prey and witless victims. The smile that curls along the man’s unshaven face is meant to charm, but all it does is unsettle.

Boba has never once trusted a man who relies solely on the weight of his words rather than his own actions. All that this man has are words. Words, and a flimsy position within the ranks of the Empire. That, and twelve heavily armed Death Troopers that guard him, if you count them as well.

Orson Krennic.

A man that’ll get what’s coming to him. Perhaps not Boba’s own plasma bolt through the middle of his finely pressed uniform—but something equally as satisfying.

Grey hairs that escape his hat glint like shards of metal shrapnel in the midday sun, the Director’s smile steady as he speaks. “Took you long enough, bounty hunter.”

Boba’s teeth clamp onto his tongue, the metallic taste of blood flooding his tastebuds. “Too bad you have to rely on one, Director.”

Krennic snorts, folds his arms behind his back and saunters closer. “And your bounty? What of her?”

“Dead.”

#boba fett x reader #boba fett x you #UH OH CLIFF HANGER KJDKFJ #star wars #boba fett #fanfic #my writing #the last favor series #orson krennic #reader insert #FINALLY THIS HOE DONE

456 notes · View notes

petewentzisblack1312 · 3 years

Note

hey dils!! was listening to sunshine riptide and thought of u so i wanted to say i hope ur taking care and also ask if u have any favorite fob videos/interviews?? lately i have been obsessed w the promo video patrick did for the honda civic tour where he drove around LA and said the only reason they got the tour was because he already drove a civic ahsjdbd

first of all it is SO flattering that listening to sunshine riptide made you think of me 🥺

secondly i was molded out of clay to answer this question, 100% i have a lot that i think about like way too often

the one where petes giving a tour of his parents house where he lived at the time and was showing off his stuff and was particularly very excited about the fact that his band was turned into action figures and then half way through andy shows up and is like "were best friends forever!" and petes like "yeah andy comes over for sleepovers a lot, we hang out in my basement and make zines and stuff" and then at the end he gets all excited cuz he hears his moms car pull up and he goes out and shes coming out of the car and then patrick gets out of the car carrying groceries and petes like "here mom me and patrick can put the groceries away you finish the interview" and shes like "no- pete i just got home from work im a mess" and hes like "what? no! no mom you look great, you can finish the interview well take in the groceries" and then she did and the camera crew came back to the two of them messing around and putting groceries away.

"pete wentz is honestly the only way to describe pete wentz. hes the most complicated guy i know." [cut to] "if anyone can make a strike without touching the lane i will pay you $300" *throws bowling balls straight into the air* *runs down the lane*

ok but in all seriousness i love that interview not only for that iconic moment but because later the footage is like blaring i dont care and pete goes and grabs a stuffed giraffe out of the prize thingie and hes like "what do you mean :)? we bought this with our tickets!!" and the editors are very much trying to make it a bad boy rebel without a cause moment except if you looked the woman behind the counter had a smile on her face and was laughing and then afterwards he gave it back and said "we werent really gonna steal it" but it really seemed like she knew that already

and then at a different point a couple fans showed up and they were all shy and excited to meet him and he was just like "hey are you guys coming to the show later" and they were like "yeah" and he was like "cool! thanks for coming out :) do you want a picture?" and they took a picture and it seemed like he was still kinda excited that people were excited to meet him. marcus (their bodyguard) was like trailing behind him and smiling and laughing throughout most of these antics and i just think thats sweet.

later in this same interview once again as they were on the ride back to their hotel or whatever theyd brought back a fake moustache and patrick put it on and did a bunch of dumb impressions.

patrick: if i wasnt doing music i think id be like a music critic or music journalist or something

andy:...i thought you said youd work at walmart

theres this one srar era interview thats just joe and patrick riffing for like 15 minutes. like it looks like they just straight up forgot the interviewer was there its so funny theyre such good friends.

this one joe and pete interview where i dont even really remember what they were talking about but theres a moment where joes talking about music with this intense passion and pete just kinda looks at him with this level of brotherly pride that keeps me going

this one andy and pete interview where 1) there were waterfowl chillin behind them which was deeply fascinating to andy and 2) they took a moment to swivel their chairs and hug each other bc theyre besties

band superlatives, specifically the moment where theyre all separately like "technically marcus isnt in the band but like. its marcus." bc that was sweet, unofficial 5th member of fob. and also "whos the most talented" "patrick. patrick. its patrick, hands down." "hm. petes like a really good soccer player" like thats a moment out of a fucking sitcom

halloween asmr with pete wentz. the man cant act but god can he commit to a bit.

there was this like live text chat that they all were in with fans on some radio station website. there were a lot of very fun moments, including joe saying "this is very current technology." as a comment on how very dated the live chat was and andy being like "can we set an icon i wanna change mine to an XVX" and pete and joe being like "oh are you vegan straight edge? we had no idea." and then pete was like "actually i wanna change my icon to andy hurley" and andy was like "no pete im not gonna send you a picture of me" and he was like :( and then a minute later he changed it to andy and he was like, and i swear this is almost a direct quote "BOOM! i love my life haha" and andy was like "goddammit" like i have no idea where to find this but it was so good.

theres this one "this or that" interview with joe and andy wherein the interviewer was a woman and like she seemed pretty at ease around them and got to the last question and imo seemed kinda uncomfortable and kind of established (in a way that seemed like she didnt usually do that) that it was a gross question, which was "would you have sex with a super hot celebrity but shes just died" and both of them were like "hey. what the fuck. absolutely not." and shes like "oh thats a first" and they are both like "do people say yes to that????????" and shes like "youre literally the first people to say no haha" in a way that made it seem that she did not find it funny and i just find that to be an interesting moment and i hope shes doing well and has a better producer now.

theres this one interview w andy on a hardcore podcast where the interviewer asks andy "do you every wish fall out boy were more political?" and he said (paraphrasing) "fall out boy is political, in its own way. we may not be as explicit with our politics as my other stuff, but kids find fall out boy, and through me, with all my other bands, or through joe, since he does a lot of metal, find heavier stuff, and are introduced to this stuff and to being vegan straight edge or anarchist or just more radical politics, and i dont think that just because we arent being super political in our music we arent a political band" which was really something to me bc i had just been thinking about that as a concept i call "gateway punk"

theres this one interview i recently found of a very small chicago music news outlet where a young lady interviewed pete and asked far more interesting questions than any other interviewer id ever seen and one such question was how he felt about the legalization of marijuana in illinois and he said that it was cool that it was legal but everyone locked up for it right now should be released and i like that he got to be political

theres a moment on the badass jew podcast episode joe was on where the interviewer whomst i do not recall was espousing some veiled antiblack sentiments wrt some antisemitic comments some famous black people had made and joe just completely rebutted it immediately and pointed out that black people not only are not a monolith bht are at a greater disadvantage

and also he made a joke that i could never make and cant fully get bc im not jewish but it was very funny and i love hearing people make jokes that arent for me.

this one interview before patrick had kids where he was saying how everyone kept asking him and elisa when theyd have kids and he was like "you cant just make that happen yknow? how do you just do that?" and pete immediately grinned and leaned over and mock whispered "you have sex" and patrick punched the air and was like "i hate you so much"

that one interview about abap where pete was like "we actually got the guy who did the whistles on patience by guns n roses to do it on this" and then he looks over at patrick and patrick shakes his head and petes like "you couldnt let me have this?" and he was like "i was gonna but then you looked at me and i just couldnt."

"whats the most important thing to you right now?"

patrick: star wars

joe: my daughter.

patrick: ...my son?

the puppy interview. everyone involved including the puppies was having the time of their goddamn life.

i have to stop this is too much its been like an hour

#dils declares #theyre so stupid.

46 notes · View notes

milkacchan · 4 years

Text

Request for anon: Ah!! My bad!! Didn't know you couldn't write controversial stuff!! I'll be happy to resend the ask!))May I have Enji, Bakugo, and Deku with a very punk S/O?-Anarchy anon

Bakugou:

• He thinks its very entertaining.

• V e r y

• He likes what you wear 🥺🥺

• He thinks they suit you

• they match your skin

• and your body

• thigh highs?? Yes.

• skirts??? He loves it

• tight jeans?? Baby pop the duck off

• studded collar? Y e s

• all your bracelets? Shits dope as duck

• Listen I know his parents literally work in fashion- but he did not inherit the genes needed to be good at it

• so you're gonna have to help hi

• and your make up blows him away

• You teach him how to do eyeliner

• bc we all know he abuses the power

• so you sit him down and you show him how you do yours

• and then you give him an extra eyeliner pen and he copies each step

• Now his eyeliner is sharp as fuck

• its great

• he'll help you dye your hair

• which you love because the feeling of him playing with you hair or running his fingers through it to even out the dyed strands feels like heaven

• you've fallen asleep from it before

• he thinks its funny

• bc here you are

• big scary punk babe

• falling asleep bc he's playing w your fucking hair

• HE LOVES YOUR ATTITUDE

• There just this ion give a fuck attitude that punks have

• and he lives for it

• except when it comes to school

• or anything else productive

• so basically just when you're dealing with other people

• bc he's absolutely on your ass about grades

• he'll come w you to get new piercings

• stick n pokes are a no go tho

• seriously he'll flip lmaoo

Deku-

• Bro you and Dekj are literally the opposite

• he's ✨🧚‍♀️🥰😍💋💫❣❣

• a fucking bottom

• and youre 🤬👺😈💢♠️⛓💉🩸🗡

• its very amusing to see a babey decked out in black and blue and purple with crazy fucking hair, screamjng profanities at some bitch who had the misfortune of messing w ur bf

• and then a broccoli boy w green hair panicked and trying to pull you away from the fight

• :)

• he's enamored with your makeup tho

• heavy eyeliner?? Yes

• blush??? Yes.

• eyeliner in places thats not your fucking eye? Yes.

• Black lipstick? Yes.

• Babey wants to try and to it 🥺

• its harder than he thinks

• he's looking at the best he just made on your eyelids and he's like 😓

• he likes to try on your jewelry too!!

• just chill with it throughout the day

• like he'll walk into class one day wearing your spiked choker and no one bats an eye

• bc they just know

• its a deku thing

• or he'll come in wearing your cool hand chain things on days they don't have to train

• or your bracelets!

• also?? He sees your coping method of piercings

• and that you do them yourself

• and he'll watch as you do it like 🥰🥰

• he'll make sure its all safe tho!!!

• just because you're punk doesn't mean you can't be safe!!!!

• he likes to see all your cool pins :(

• he'll steal those too

• @ arthur making a fist meme pin

• your favorite one

• he SNATCHES

• HE JUST TAKES IT

• AND YOURE LOOKING FOR IT

• UNTIL ONE DAY YOU SEE IT ON HIS MOTHER FUCKING BACKPACK

• n your like sir??????

• whomst??

• you can't take it from him tho 😔

• he's just too cute and he'd be sad if you took it

• he'll sometimes pick your outfit to go out

• or he'll have you style something he can wear so he looks 😤😤 too

• and its a vibe

Enji:

• You'd never think

• THE Enji Todoroki

• would end up

• w someone

• like

• you

• He's a very composed man

• He dresses well, expensive designer brands

• he's always put together and well-mannered (for the most part)

• and then there's you

• the fucking gremlin from hell that runs on caffeine and energy drinks that looks like a hottopic advertisement

• Its awesome tbh

• Shouto LOVES you

• Bc you're in your late 20's- Early 30's and you fr just living not giving a shit

• Not acting like his mother

• knowing you have like 0 authority over him

• just fucking vibing

• And somehow you managed to snag his dad??

• youre the embodiment of ill marry your date and make you my stepson bitch

• he's like yo, I see you

• Enji lowkey (highkey he just doesn't think its obvious) finds it hot

• that you dress the way you too

• and your attitude

• it just does things to him

• he just really really likes the vibe

• theres an excitement of finally just letting go and saying fuck it after a long day of being composed

• and it appeals to him

• I feel like lowkey part of the punk vibe is making/thrifting/mismatching clothes and just good hard as fuck

• like

• I got these pants from Walmart, this shirt from 7/11 that I cut up and I found these shoes behind the dumpster of an Arby's so here we fucking go

• so when he buys you fancy and expensive punk shit you're like 😤😤😤

• but also like 👁👁

• bc get that bread sis

• mans just watches you kill your hair with bleach and hair dye

• "Would you like me to call and schedule and appointment with Fuyumis hair stylist?" He asks with confusion

"No!! We're fucking shit up is what we're doing. We HAVE to do it this way!!!!"

"Okay, would you like help? I can try the best I'm able to,"

"Aw bby, help is for the week."

• you end up needing help to get the back lmaoooo

• you do your own haircuts

• bc like I said

• fucking shit up

• thats the vibe

• m u l l e t

• PLEASE

• or you know the girls that cut lil bits of their hair so short it looks like lil horns??

• please do that

• I promise he'll get rlly soft about it

• "I believe it suits you," he'll say softly, running his fingers through the ends of your hair

"Thanks, I fucked it up and went for it."

• he tends not to curse as much

• so

• :)

• you'll curse for him

• some shit goes wrong? You're right next to him?

• get ready for the storm bb

• "oh you mother fucking cu-"

• he honestly doesn't mind the mouth

• bc like I said before

• its refreshing for him to know he can come home and not be expected to be composed

• He will absolutely be willing to pay for whatever tattoos you want

• and honestly just take him up on it bc tattoos are expensive like

• 3 letters is like 150 bruh

• but!! Piercings are done at home!

• unless they're in your mouth :)

• tongue piercing or that peircing above your teeth

• he won't let you do shit like that at home

• when you did get them he helped you take care of them

• but esr piercings are free game

• overall he's very very supportive in the way you dress and act all around• he really doesn't mind at all

313 notes · View notes

scriptaed · 4 years

Text

his side, her side | 6:00 P.M.

genre: angst/fluff/implied smut; (bold = genre for this particular drabble)

pairing: reader x jungkook;

length: 2.9k;

synopsis: a collective snapshots in time shared between two, whose fates were undeniably intertwined and futures would never come to be.

a/n: this is not a chronological series; more so, his side her side is a collection of drabbles in which each drabble helps paint the overall picture. each drabble can be read separately without having read the others. // alternatively: his side, her side pt. 6;

her side;

A dreadfully long hour has passed but your search for a certain something remains unceasing amidst a room filled of boredom—what that certain something is, however, you, yourself, would never hear the word of. Too deep into the workshop to leave, you roam around the room without a particular destination or goal in mind akin to a lost child swamped by a swarm of adults with ambition greater than yours. Familiar colleagues from workshop sessions outside of the small bubble that is yours are scattered throughout the cramped room, bustling about and acquiring the help of your supervisors. Some faces wear scowls as a subtle albeit inept form of protest against their already overflowed stack of responsibilities, whereas others glimmer with an edge of hunger for a potential although never-coming promotion in their eyes.

The friend whomst you make sure to stick elbow-to-elbow with falls in the latter category, whilst you, on the other hand, remain distracted by the shrouded haze in your eyes; and as if peering through the opaque mist that is the crowd, your search trudges on for a familiar look of resilience masked by the impression of indifference that should have stood a stark contrast to the rising swarm of the dead that you like to describe as your colleagues.

You aren’t exactly looking for something. After all, you had sought the company of your friend with the thought of extra cash in your mind, yet here you are now: unable to see clearly and focus obviously elsewhere and undetectable in this room.

“Y/N?” Yezi interrupts her explanation to your own question to allure you back into reality. “Are you looking for something?”

“Huh?” you only manage to utter before frowning and shaking your head. “No, why?”

“Because you keep staring at the door,” Yezi responds to your unconvincing denial with a scoff, “but alright, if you say so.”

You would never admit it even if you were on your deathbed, but who are you really kidding? Yezi could see right through you. In fact, you could see right through you. Maybe the discretion of your wandering eyes had initially been unbeknownst to you, but once every minute of your long passing days become a painful reminder of your eternal trek to retrieve your sanity into your own hands once again? The true whereabouts of your consciousness becomes evident.

It isn’t something that you’re looking for, but rather, it’s someone… and once that someone comes striding into the door with his usual gym shorts and a bottle in hand, the fog clears along with the identity of that very someone. Your heart pounds to the beat of flutters that dust your insides as well as the pump of thrill that travels from your core, but the grand relief of your efforts to come here in the hopes of bumping into him having not been in vain are short-lived when your tunnel-like vision is accompanied by the woman beside him.

“Oh,” Yezi pauses, eyes following your line of sight, “isn’t that your workshop partner, Jungkook? I thought you said he wasn’t coming to Q&A.”

“Well…” your voice withers by the second. “He didn’t tell me he was.”

“Why’s he with someone else?” she quirks a brow at the odd pairing that neither you nor her had ever fathomed for an aloof man like Jungkook. “Wouldn’t it make more sense to attend with your partner?”

She’s right. It would make more sense and it’s definitely a thought that had crossed your mind before you opted for a safer, more viable and less embarrassing option of inviting your friend instead. Jungkook has always been the type to unapologetically speak his mind so it occurred to you that if he really needed the help, he would have reached out to you, his partner, and not her… his friend whom you never knew he was even acquainted with.

“Who’s she again?” you ask nonchalantly, glimpsing between the workshop packet at hand and the woman beside Jungkook.

“You don’t know her? That’s Jennie,” Yezi snorts, blowing her bangs along with the roll of her eyes. “Quite pretty, isn’t she?”

The more your eyes flicker, the more you find yourself staring at the woman in silent awe. You’ve seen her around work before, but you never really had the chance to introduce yourself nor did you ever really want to; because even now, you’re scared of prolonging your ganders and comparing yourself to her undeniable beauty.

Jungkook would be a foolish man not to recognize it himself, you realize with a weight settling in your chest, so it really shouldn’t be much of a surprise that the two are acquainted. You’ve never been the insecure type, but when you search for a possible reason behind his trust in Jennie over his trust in you, a daunting epiphany dawns upon you: maybe Jungkook has a thing for her.

“...I guess,” you mutter with a shrug, quickly darting your eyes to focus on the packet of questions before you when you notice the pair making their way toward you. “Anyways, which number were we on?”

The indifferent front you put on is nothing but that, for the following hour consisted of you dragging your friend and shuffling into the opposite corner of the room each time you caught them approaching your direction. The unsettling twist of a sensation in your gut comes as an unexplained surprise to you, but the aching burden only doubles in magnitude with each moment you have to catch yourself glimpsing at the perfect pair from afar.

Sometimes, you swear your flickering eyes must have locked with his for even the most fleeting of seconds and it only deepens the cut further.

“Hey,” Yezi pauses, looking up at something behind you.

“Y/N,” a familiar voice utters behind you and you can’t help but freeze.

For some reason, you decide to play it off as if you hadn’t heard a thing and somehow the problem would just disappear on its own. That, however, obviously goes badly when a firm finger taps on your shoulder.

“What?” you finally snap, whirling around to face Jungkook. You might have put on the most apathetic look you could muster, but the bite of your tongue for having poorly greeted a man out of spite is almost as great as the surprise elicited by the empty spot beside his elbows. “Oh, you came?”

“Yeah,” he answers, “how long have you been here?”

“Pretty long.” Guilt builds with every second of silence shared between you two until it consumes you. “What about you?”

“Just got here not long ago.”

Right, so he decides to leave the Jennie part out.

After a few seconds of stagnant silence, you nodding your head and him staring blankly at you, he decides to prolong the conversation—a rarity for someone like him.

“How long are you staying?”

If he had come walking in today without anyone—or maybe even if it was someone other than her—you would have lied and stayed to capture an extra hour of interaction with him, but that just isn’t the case. Seeing how he’s only approaching you now once Jennie has left to whatever whereabouts, your heart of steel decides it’s unwilling to be the second option for tonight.

“...uh, about to go,” you say, ignoring the arched brow of your friend’s.

It’s a lie, but hopefully a harmless one at that.

“Oh, ‘kay,” he prims, “could we share our resources afterwards?”

You only realize it then. He’s only there when he needs to use you. Maybe it’s an overreaction and maybe you’re just insecure, but it doesn’t change the fact that every beacon of hope and every gesture you had suspected to be a reciprocation of your feelings have been nullified. If you were to survive the next months whilst working with a man like Jungkook, you know things would have to change.

You would have to change.

“Sure.”

And nothing has been the same since.

his side;

“Is something on your mind, Kook?”

The man turns around in bed to face the woman beside him before propping himself up, careful not to undrape the woman’s bare chest as the shared blanket falls from that of his own. Hair tousled and chest heaving from the thrilling high just minutes prior, his voice croaks after an hour long of lewd groans that once filled his room.

“No,” he turns to meet his frown reflecting off the mirror across his bed, “why?”

“Well, you were kind of… submissive today,” she chuckles as she sits up beside him and starts to untangle his hair. “Don’t get me wrong, it was amazing, as always, but I miss the assertive Kook.”

Jungkook arches a brow at her, “yeah?”

A cocky grin spreads across his lips, as if to challenge her to try him, and an overjoyed giggle tumbles from her own as they edge each other on for another round when, suddenly, an alarm goes off on the nightstand beside his bed and his darkened orbs flicker back into reality. Eyes widening and arm reaching over for his phone, he stares and ponders at the screen with his head low and his gaze shrouded by bangs.

“Ugh, really? Is it that alarm again?” Jennie groans when Jungkook’s choice of silence is the only answer she retrieves. “Who even sets up an alarm to remind them to attend workshop?”

Jungkook only chuckles, eyes still glued to the phone, “my partner, probably.”

“And you, too, apparently,” Jennie articulates.

“She’d kill me if I were late.”

And, he recalls, he did make a certain promise to her after all.

“I thought you turned the alarm off an hour ago,” the woman clutches the blanket to her chest as she continues, “were you planning to go after… this...?”

Jungkook throws a glance over his shoulder, “are you not going?”

“No, I don’t need to,” Jennie shrugs. “They’re not really helpful at all. If you want, you can ask me for help and I can always help you.”

“Yeah,” he mumbles, turning to stare at his phone once again, “but…”

Nothing ever follows through with the latter half of his sentence but having spent countless nights with Jungkook, Jennie is well acquainted enough to understand that not even Jungkook, himself, understood what he wanted to say. In fact, she would be the only to ever know exactly what kept him from accepting her offer on that very night.

“Did your partner say she was going?”

“No,” Jungkook pauses before adding, “but I know she will.”

Half the time the two spent together are more often spent in silence than not, whereas the other half of the time is occupied by salacious sayings and wanton activities that had one blushing in the morning and the other coming back for more. This moment in time follows the steps of the former.

“So you’re going, aren’t you?”

Flipping his phone in his hands, Jungkook contemplates with the sight of 6:00 P.M. glaring from his screen. Y/N must have gone at the stroke of 5:00 P.M., so even if he were to go now and search for her help, she would have either been well on her way home or found him too burdensome to lend a helping hand.

After another second of silence, Jennie finally sighs, “I’ll go with you.”

Jungkook raises a brow at Jennie’s proposal, despite the genuine relief that washes over him. The rare sight of a caught off guard Jungkook is enough to flip the frown of the girl Jennie spots in the reflection of his doe-like eyes; and even though Jungkook has no clue of the implications behind his odd sense of obligations, it’s in that moment that Jennie realizes the night of her dreams would not be so easy to acquire from a man like Jungkook after all.

For some reason, something about the obligation that stirs in Jungkook’s chest only tugs at his already quickened pace, as if his very entity is drawn to a magnetic force somewhere within the depths of his company’s building; and when he finally bursts through the doors, it comes to his surprise to find the reason behind an extension of relief in his weighted chest.

Because there his partner stands in the middle of the room, and whether by fate or happenstance, she is the first one his eyes land on in the swarm of dozens.

Jungkook has never been the type to stutter or hesitate, so it only confuses him further when he contemplates between two choices: either he stays in the room with Jennie and pretends he never saw Y/N in the first place or he awkwardly greets her and her friend even though he really has no reason to. Seeing how Y/N had not met his gaze since he walked in, the latter choice seems to be the safer one.

At the end of the day, it really isn’t up to Jungkook when Jennie drags him around the room to find her fellow colleagues who specialized in the areas of difficulty Jungkook needed help on. For a man who has never been too active at work, however, it takes his every ounce of attention to keep up with the two hours worth of information crammed into a half hour flood of a spiel. Despite catching her eyes from across the room and chuckling softly to himself over how quickly she looks away, having not crossed paths with Y/N even once during the entire ordeal doesn’t register until Jennie’s phone rings and Jungkook can finally catch his breath.

“You have any other questions?” Jennie peers up from her phone.

“No,” he answers plainly, “why?”

“Okay, good,” she resumes texting on her phone, “let’s go then.”

Jungkook leans slightly forward, as if he had heard her wrong, “now?”

“Yeah,” she looks up once again at Jungkook.

Eyes darting between the clock displayed at the front of the room and his partner that stands before it, Jungkook barely catches Jennie frowning at him in disappointment… why exactly, he could not for the life of him figure it out.

“Actually,” Jungkook mutters, “I’ll stay for half an hour more.”

“Why?” she presses, brows furrowing. “I have to go now.”

As much as Jennie’s sudden urgency surprises Jungkook, he remains visually unaffected. “You can go first.”

“I,” Jennie scoffs, flabbergasted, “I have a date, Jungkook.”

The world continues buzzing around them but neither could hear a thing. A tense silence is exchanged between the two. Jennie’s glare burns with a desperate plea and Jungkook’s gaze reflects nothing but utter confusion.

“Okay, have fun,” Jungkook finally answers. “Thanks for your help.”

“...yeah,” Jennie meekly answers after what seems to be an eternity, turning around and mumbling, “good luck.”

Something about the way her eyes softened with defeat and strided out the door without the usual persistence he knew of Jennie strikes him with guilt. Is she upset with him? Did he do something wrong? But Jungkook being Jungkook, he figures that would be a matter to deal with in the future, for the clock is ticking and his only reason to stay remains at the front of the room.

“Hey,” he hears Y/N’s friend whispering as he approaches the familiar back of his partner.

Seeing as she remains affixed with her back on him, Jungkook calls out, “Y/N.”

That, however, doesn’t seem to be enough for his partner who not only seems to have a bad eyesight but a bad hearing as well. This time, he pokes her in the shoulder.

“What?” she snaps, finally turning around to face him. “Oh, you came?”

Is every girl in a bad mood today? Jungkook can only wonder.

“Yeah,” he answers, “how long have you been here?”

“Pretty long.” Jungkook waits for her to continue. “What about you?”

So all those times when he thought his eyes had met hers are just his imagination?

“Just got here not long ago.”

Y/N only nods her head, to which Jungkook finds odd for someone as talkative and giggly as her. Maybe she’s tired… or maybe he really is a hindrance to her like he had feared.

“How long are you staying?” Jungkook tries once more, secretly hoping maybe he wouldn’t be left here alone.

“...uh, about to go.”

“Oh—” he ignores whatever that drop in his chest means “—’kay, could we share our resources afterwards?”

It’s a rarity for Jungkook to give any shits about what others thought of him, unless they were someone he actually cared for. Work is work. If he had to be an annoying piece of shit to get that paycheck, then he’s more than willing to be that annoying shithead… but when it comes to Y/N? For some reason, being a burden to her is the last thing he wants to do, yet at this point, the burden he places on her seems to be the only thing retaining their connection.

“Sure.”

At this very moment, Jungkook would have never foreseen the future that would divide the path between himself and the woman before him, but when the time comes and he reflects in retrospect, one thing’s for sure.

Nothing has been the same since.

#bts scenarios #bts x reader #jungkook scenarios #bts x you #bts smut #bts angst #bts fluff #jungkook smut #jungkook angst #jungkook fluff #bts imagines #jungkook x reader #jungkook x you #jungkook fanfic #bts fanfic #bangtan scenarios #bangtan fanfic #scriptaed

330 notes · View notes

jjba-hell · 3 years

Text

Fate and Fortune

So this was sitting in my WIP folder forever and I was bouncing between self-insert and OC but I figured it was just too specific for self-insert... ✌︎('ω')✌︎

Part 1 of (?) and tagging some moots- @risottoneroo (I know you’ve been going through it recently, I hope this upcoming series can help distract you just a little bit- I know your writing always helps pick me up) @giogio-gucci-gangstar @rat-makes-stuff and @uttertrash (sorry =w= I get nervous tagging any moots)

Setting for this one is pre-Stardust Crusaders and the best dscription for this timeline is MY CANON NOW. This is a very short entry piece of how Vera (my OC) first met Muhammed Abdul. As the story progresses I’ll give more explanation and context to my OC but for now, all ya gots ta know is that it starts off in Egypt.

Content warning is pretty mild- maybe some mysticism if you’re not comfortable with that but nothing beyond that. (Ya’ll know you just gotta et me know if I miss something)

Also- my interpretation of the tarot crads is about like 20% more accurate than Araki’s- meaning its probably not completly right but it makes a bit more sense than canon.

1.4 K words

Life as an expat in a foreign country wasn’t easy to begin with. Vera grew up a bit isolated from the real world, safely hidden behind the tall walls that held her with the other expat children from expat homes. That was, until she decided to go to a neaarby local market- in search of some cooler casual fabrics, an alternative to the continuously wrong winter fabrics the expat camp gave them for ventures outside of the walls of the camp- even though it was much too luxurious to be called a camp.

The decision to desert the safety o fthe camp had been made on a whim, without much warning to her parents, as casual as if she were heading toward the expat gym.

In hindsight, so much could have gone wrong for a 16-year old foreign girl but the threat of danger was never something she had felt too greatly. She had always felt safe- in a way. It had felt like there was always this...presence around her when she felt any unease. Dangerous or nerve racking situations unfolded themselves as life usually does, but things had a tendency to go her way, danger seeming to veer out of her path. She chcuckled at the thought- how cocky she used to be. Her first few trips unaccompanied had only cemented her idea that she was untouchable.

One faithful day- a few months after continous visits to the market- among the many stalls, stood a tall dark skinned Egyptian man- looming over the wares of a vendor whom Vera had made good acquaintances with. “Ah Muhammed. This is that teenager I was telling you about, the foreigner.”

“Hello Hassan.” She smiled- trying to hint at greeting her first.

She turned to the man beside her, almost two heads taller than herself. Two markings moved down his handsome face, a playful smile on his face- slightly marred by his eyes that seemed to hide an impossible sadness behind the warm brown. “You must be Vera. Pleasant to make your acquaintance. I’m Muhammed Abdul.” He gave a courteous nod, hands folding into his somewhat overlflowing robe sleeves.

Hassan leaned in to chip into the conversation before you could answer. “Vera is a foreigner, doesn’t divulge what her parents do but they’re the first in a long time to walk out the camp unaccompanied.”

“Now Hassan, I’m not one of your wares, no need to advertise me like that.” She smiled at the wares dealer with just a glimmer of warning in her eyes.

Muhammed chuckled. “More importantly why would you want to?” He asked with feign suspision.

Hassan looked shocked, dramatically holding his hand over his chest. “Muhammed, was it not you telling me just a few moments ago that you needed a new assistant for your shop.”

Hassan then rounded on Vera. “And didn’t you say you’d like a part-time job for some extra coin.”

Muhammed threw his head back and gave a hearty laugh straight out of his chest. “Hassan, if I didn’t know any better I’d swear this was an elaborate scheme to get Vera to buy more of your wares.”

Hassan showed his open palms up beside his head in a sign of surrender. “Caught red-handed. Easier to persuade her to buy something when her wallet is full. But why don’t you just believe that it’s a kind gesture?”

Muhammed turned towards you, that same warm smile on his face. “If you’re willing, Vera, we can discuss these things in my shop if you like.”

In the back of her mind she was a bit apprehensive, she’d been taught to keep her guard up when out alone. But then again, she had some mace on her persons, just in case of an emergency. And that presence looming over her shoulder seemed to make itself a bit more known, bringing a comforting warmth to her shoulders. So ,impulsively, she had agreed. “I’d love to see what you have to offer.”

Vera and Muhammed bid Hassan a temporary goodbye, Hassan assuring her that he’d skin Muhammed alive if he laid a finger her. Somehow the image of Hassan attempting to skin this monstrosity of a man walking ahead of her -almost gliding through the streets to his shop- a bit comical but at least she could appreciated the gesture. Ducking under a stone arch and then curling up some stone steps the two of them stopped in front of an old wooden door- looking as if it came straight from the 14th century.

Muhammed unlocked the heavy black iron lock and pushed the door open to reveal a ceiling of stars, dangling charms and sigils. “Would I be stereotyping you if I assumed you were a mystic of some sort?”

Muhammed gave a warm chuckle.“Indeed I am. I am what you’d consider a fortune teller, and Hassan heard assistant, when in actuality I was looking for an apprentice.”

“Would you say there’s a difference?” She had chcukled as she entered deeper into the shop.

Muhammed kept the door open, stepping through behind her as her eyes travelled through all the trinkets, stones, and more.

“Unfortunately there is. If I overstep a boundary, you are more than welcome to leave but...may I ask. Have you ever felt...guarded? Or watched? As if nothing could go wrong and if it did, it would turn out your favor.”

For a moment she couldn’t help but smile to herself. “Sounds like some crazy luck.”

Muhammed laughed again. She spun around on her heel and saw a deck of cards in his hands, tapping the edges on the red clothed table. “It’s actually a phenomenon I study. It’s considered mysticism but...if you really want this job, I’d suggest you at least have some inkling of what that feeling is.”

Abdul’s eyes flashed dark as his gaze moved from Vera to just beside her head. She frowned in confusion, looking over her shoulder to see nothing but before she could ask, Muhammed immediately looked her head-on with a calm yet stern expression. The focus in his eyes back.

“I’ll be honest with you, Mr Abdul. I do possess that feeling. Although it wavers from time to time- probably makes me a little cocky but I’ve never faced a problem that didn’t solve itself.”

Muhammed smiled, straightened a bit and then seamlessly slid into the chair at the table.

“A tarot reading? Before we discuss money then?”

She had laughed but slid into the chair in front of him and watched Abdul’s skilled fingers shuffle the deck and spread it out before her. “Pick three.”

One. Two. Three.

He slid them back together and arranged the three chosen cards a specific way.

“The past. Judgement, reversed.”

“Care to explain?” Her gaze locked with his for a moment.

“Your past is a source of turmoil to you- a never ending fountain of self-doubt and self-flagellation.”

Vera shrugged, not reacting much to this. She wasn’t about to explain her whole life to him any time soon.

“The present. Death, upright. Big change is coming very soon. Be weary of the storm that lies before you.”

You nodded, a slow fear creeping up your spine. Even Abdul seemed to swallow a bit harder at the prospect, as if avoiding her gaze.

“And future. Wheel of fortune, upright. You are the guardian of your own fate- even through the ever-changing storm of fates.”

She nodded, feeling more at ease with the last prediction. “Is it normal to feel such a variety of emotions after a read?”

Muhammed only smiled as he folded his arms before him. “It is. However no one likes pulling the death card. But that beside the point. How does 300 a week sound to you?”

“Generous.”

“Oh it‘ll only seem that way at the start. Later you’ll cuss me out for paying you so little. For now, I think it best I show you the ropes first.”

There a was a beat of silence, before Muhammed gracefully brought his hand out to shake. “Do we have a deal?”

Vera hesitated a moment before trusting in her own character judgement and shaking his hand to seal the deal. Abdul’s warmth as well as what she had seen from his character thusfar had her feeling as though she could trust him. But she’d be lying if that was the only reason- that unshakable good luck she’d been carrying on her shoulders her whole life seemed to assure her that if a problem ever did arise- she’d still be in control of her own fate.

It was, however, not Abdul whomst she had to worry about...

For not a month into her apprenticeship- Death has already sunken its claws into her life, and a violent change would alter the course of her life forever.

#jojo kimyou na bouken #jojos bizarre adventure #jojo part 3 #muhammed abdul #oc content #my writing #stardust crusaders #Fate and Fortune

23 notes · View notes

slutsofren · 4 years

Note

Hallo! Here’s my official request for some fluff with CEO! Kylo & Mistress for the time he tells her he loves her & his plans for the future :3

This one was super super fun to write but finding the words to put down was so difficult, im so so so sorry @bicthpotato but thank you dearly for your patience !!

Just Because I Love You

Summary: Kylo is in town to spend some time with you, you cannot wait for you two to take some time off and relax. Being the CEOs of your own companies was rough work so Kylo has a little speech for you.

General Info: CEO Kylo & Mistress AU, fluff, first time saying “I love you”, teasing, lots of teasing and sarcasm, light cursing, Kylo talking about his emotions?? whomst???

Read on AO3 here! Just under 2k.

It was 4:00 on the dot, you knew you’d be able to slip out of the office easily at this time. Besides, you were the boss, who was going to stop you? Your employees knew better, each one went through your rather rigorous 60 day training period and if they lasted then they deserved all the benefits you were able to grant them. They were grateful to be here under your care just as much as you were grateful they helped create a loving work environment.

It helps being a powerful boss ass bitch. You wore that title proud.

What you also wore proud was the immaculate silver necklace around your neck with an elegant “K” charm dangling, catching the light of every room you walked into. It was the latest gift from Kylo, just because he missed you and wanted you to have a small piece of him with you in Los Angeles after you came home.

Your fingers fidgeted with the charm, rubbing the “K” over and over. You looked at your watch once again, 4:05. You rose from your chair and rounded the desk, grabbing your work satchel and coat, flicking the light off behind you. Your assistant looked up from her computer, “Headed home early, ma’am?”

“How many times do I have to tell you,” you teased, “don’t call me ‘ma’am’ I’m not old.”

She let out a hearty laugh, “Of course, is there anything you’d like me to finish up, Miss?” You paused and thought for a moment but you couldn’t bear to think about work much longer.

“Do one thing and then you can go home, email each department to give everybody the rest of the day off.”

“On account of what, Miss?”

“On the account that I’m in a damn good mood and I’m going to see somebody that I’ve missed dearly.”

You gave her one last smile before continuing out of the office, a little hop found its way into your step echoing in the clinks of the darling heels you wore.

It’s been a couple months since you met the infamous Kylo Ren. You didn’t know who he was when you two met that fateful evening but after spending not just the night together but the following week with him, you knew he was somebody you wanted to continue keeping in your life.

In summary, the relationship the two of you cultivated was almost like two stars colliding in the galaxy and choosing to fly together. The choice to stay around each other, watching him with his explosive temper and him watching you in your cool rage, that choice made whatever you had with Kylo Ren feel powerful and unwavering.

After your time in New York with what you initially thought would be a fling, he visited you in California once before. After your second trip to New York, it was then that you knew in your heart that you were in it for the long haul.

It was nice, you thought as you drove down the busy Los Angeles freeways. You have an incredibly sexy date tonight and he is probably the sexiest man in the world.

You were eager to return home, hoping to see the man who invaded your thoughts soon. His plane was expected to land after it got dark and the two of you had planned a simple wine and dine on the balcony of your apartment. A nice cozy evening with one of the warmest souls you’ve ever met.

The apartment building you lived in was one of those that was lingering from old Hollywood, the art deco structure was an iconic look which made you love it from your first visit. It also helped the security on the building was top notch, something you’ve come to appreciate being a woman living by yourself.

“Honey, I’m home,” you said to no one as you entered your home, leaving your keys in a small bowl by the front door. As you removed your shoes by the doorway, you noticed there was a dark grey silk scarf on the coat rack, an item of clothing that was certainly not yours.

You ran your fingers over it, feeling its softness. After a moment you caught a whiff of the cologne that lightly came off it- it was distinctly Kylo. Your heart went into a flutter as your hands reached the bottom of the scarf where there was a black monogram KR embroidered on the rich material. That smile you had been forcing down finally spread wide across your face as you called his name loudly.

“Over here, little one,” his deep voice rang from outside your balcony. You took off your coat, throwing it off to some chair at your dining bar area.

Kylo stood on the balcony, waiting for you leaning against the glass railing. He looked incredibly handsome standing there, the sun illuminated each and every single one of his beauty marks that you’d come to love tracing over with sweet kisses during moments of reprieve. His shirt was a tad bit ruffled, adding to his charm. Clearly a man who worked as fast as he could just to fly to your neck of the woods just as fast.

You could hardly catch your breath as you took the few remaining steps that kept you from your lover, a truly decadent sweet. As your arms found themselves around his neck, his lips met yours in a sweet, chaste kiss. Nothing could be spoken that could mirror the joy in your heart, only the smile you felt sprawled on your face.

“Hey, handsome,” you spoke as you gazed up at Kylo.

He looked at you, letting his hands snake down to your hips, “Hey.”

The two of you kissed one more time before he grabbed one of your hands that was wrapped around his neck, he gave another kiss to the back of your hand. “A true gentleman,” you poked.

He let out a groan, “Quiet you, just sit in the damn chair, there’s something we need to talk about.” By the looks of his facial expression, you knew it was serious but nothing of concern, something that eased your mind for the time being. He led you by your hand, not once letting go and sat you down in one of the two chairs sitting on the balcony. You noticed that Kylo took the liberty of setting out your dinner plates for two on the table alongside fresh flowers, a colorful arrangement of carnations, daisies, baby’s breath, and roses. The mixture of reds and whites filled your heart with adoration for the gruff man in front of you.

Kylo always carried an air of aggression and being rough around the edges, something you’d easily recognize as his signature. It didn’t matter in the end, only that you’d know you’d never be subjected to the end of his red hot blade.

“So,” you edged him on, “Is it Bazine?” He shook his head. “Your mother,” you felt yourself grow cold. He shook his head again, saying nothing. Instead of words he sat down opposite of you and reached into his jacket pocket that hung around the back of his chair and grabbed something, a small box.

He passed it to you, a black box wrapped in a fine white silk ribbon. It was small, fit perfectly in the palm of your hand as you picked it up. “What’s this, Kylo? I’m sure I’ve told you time and time again not to get me gifts,” you laughed.

He looked away, resting back in his seat. “Just open the damned box already, brat.” You laughed again, knowing his little tantrum was a jest. Something you’ve grown to love about him.

The ribbon fell away easily, as if wanting nothing more than you to hurry and open the box too, you took a moment and glanced back to Kylo. His eyes grew dark as he covered his mouth with one of his hands, his eyebrows just as furrowed in hesitation. You could tell he was a bit anxious.

With a click, the little black box was open. Inside was a silver cuff bracelet. Simple, modest, and everything you could ever admire in a jewelry piece. “Oh, Kylo, I love it!”

“Keep looking at it,” his voice low.

A quick glance back down to your hands as you turned the cuff over and there it was, an inner engraving with a simple, “Just because I love you”. A phrase that instantly triggered tears of happiness well in your eyes.

“You love me?”

He looked at you, astonished you could say such a thing and leaned forward, “Of course, why wouldn’t I? You’re incredible in a room, you command attention, your very essence demands respect.”

You looked back down at the cuff, admiring the words shine in the sunlight, “You sure know how to charm a lady,” you teased in a deadpan voice.

Kylo leaned back in his seat, noting the hints of playful sarcasm you emanated and let out a scoff, “You’re ruthless, little one. I just told you that I love you and your first instinct is to bust my balls.” You chuckled but continued to admire your gift. He whispered your name, calling you to look in his eyes.

“You owe me nothing, and yet here we are. You waltzed into my life and after knowing the mess I’m in with Baz you stayed in my life, she’ll never forgive either of us for as long as she lives. Not to mention my own mother. You are a strong woman and you’ve seen the absolute terror I can be and yet here you are,” he paused, running his fingers through his hair.

“There is not a damn thing in this world that I wouldn’t change or do any differently if that meant I wouldn’t have met you in that restaurant. Fuck, go on a vacation, a long one, after I sign divorce papers, we could buy a whole new apartment in New York, one that Bazine will never step foot in and that could, I don’t fucking know, be an actual home for you and I. You’ve not a single clue just how much life and love you bring with you, and just how being around you makes me feel, I just-,” he pauses again, realizing he’s ranting, “I didn’t mean to go off on some big speech but what I wanted to say was that I love you, if you’d be willing to be in this fucked up version of a relationship with me for the foreseeable future and hopefully thereafter too, then maybe we can do that whole ‘let’s spend the rest of our lives together’ bullshit I’m always hearing about.”

This was the first time you’d ever heard Kylo Ren lay bare more than he ever had, admitting his own brash reactions, a mild hint at his own insecurities, and for the briefest of moments you were breathless.

Instead of choosing words, you hastily put the cuff on and stood from your chair taking two small steps to reach his noting how anxious he looked between your eyes and the newest addition to your jewelry set. You sat on his lap, taking a moment to caress his sharp jawline, “That was a lot of words to say I love you and you want to call me your girlfriend.”

He closed his eyes and threw his head back groaning, “Why are you like this!”

You gave him a flourish of kisses all over his face, finally letting those tears from earlier fall, “Just because I love you too.”

29 notes · View notes