#but CA supporting characters are just following steve

[quixoticall]

This Could Get Ugly 6. Views from the Outside

Summary: It's 1983 and The Downsides need another lead singer and you just happen to need a band--it's a perfect match. The only issue? You have to pretend to be in a relationship with your bandmate, Steve Harrington, but you can't help but be drawn to the band's broody guitar player.

pairing: s.h. x fem!reader, e.m. x fem!reader, j.b. x n.w.,

warnings: Mention of French people, angst, fake relationships,

A/N: Hello! Once again, thank you to everyone who interacted with this in any way! I love to hear feedback and see that you're enjoying the work! Another thing: My goal with this story is that it's told over the span of 4 individual works, with "This Could Get Ugly" being the first one. What this means is that there's going to be a LOT of juicy drama to enjoy but I will be taking my time getting to it. It's been super important to me that I tell the story right and at my own pace so while it may seem like the romance is tilting to one guy over another--just know, that that's all part of the plan! My pet peeve when reading love triangle type of stuff is when you can immediately tell which love interest is the end game so my goal for this is to be as even as possible, offering romance for both Steve and Eddie (In my mind, this is less of a love triangle and more of a love different people at different points in time type of thing). Anyway, what a long note! Please enjoy the chapter!

wc: 4.6k

MASTERLIST🎸

Previous Chapter 🎹

Subrosa Article

***

JONATHAN:  I never wanted to be famous, I just wanted to play music and make enough money to support my family. I could do all of that and more with The Downsides.

I felt like the luckiest guy in the world then. We were finally starting to see some stability as a band and even though things weren’t exactly as we expected, things were good. I mean we were making music we loved with people we liked—back when we all still liked each other.

***

October 1983—Los Angeles, California

As the studio had predicted, the band’s single was a total hit, as were you and Steve in the press. The gamble Starcourt was starting to pay off.

Everyone was more relieved than happy about that news.

What followed was a few grueling weeks of rerecording the band’s nearly completed album while also strategically traipsing arm-in-arm with Steve around every romantic spot in Hollywood trying to bait the paparazzi.

Things had finally slowed down a bit since the album was in post-production, but Starcourt still had you on a tight schedule. You had transitioned into rehearsing for the band’s upcoming tour. That’s how certain Startcourt was that the Downsides were going to be a success—you were rehearsing for a tour that hadn’t even been announced yet for an album that hadn’t even been released.

You try not to think about what it would mean if the band didn’t meet the label’s expectations. Instead, you focus on figuring out how to adapt to the band you’re now a part of.

The obvious lack of familiarity between all of you was not as pronounced when you were re-recording in the studio, now that you’re all rehearsing together, it is impossible to ignore. The original members of the band share a bond that keeps them incredibly in sync, oftentimes leaving you and Eddie struggling both on and off the stage. You’ve been working to adapt though, and you’ve made progress, sometimes you’re even close to feeling like the band has accepted you as one of their own. But then something will happen that will leave you feeling like an outsider once more.

***

The last thing a hungover you needs to see at seven in the morning is a Subrosa article questioning your moral character and calling you a man-eater. The universe—in the form of one Nancy Wheeler—has a different idea.

“Have you seen this?” the keyboardist asks, indignation coloring her tone, as she slings the offending publication across your lap.

You hadn’t seen it, in fact, but one look at the grainy picture of you and Steve and you can assume what the article says.

You sigh tiredly in response, “Honestly Nancy, you shouldn’t pay attention to this shit. I don’t know why you let it bother you so much.”

“It’s just so unfair that they’re singing Steve’s praises and are still dragging you through the mud, even though you’ve done nothing wrong.”

“Exactly, there’s no winning with them, not for me. So why don’t we just say fuck them and do whatever we want?” You find it in yourself to waggle your eyebrows playfully at her earning a giggle from the otherwise serious girl.

You catch Eddie watching your exchange from across the large warehouse that is serving as the band’s rehearsal space with a curious amount of interest.

The two of you have barely spoken since your row outside of Starcourt. It’s not like you’re missing out on much though, since Eddie barely interacts with the band beyond rehearsal which makes his apparent engagement with your conversation unusual. Eddie, realizing he’s been caught staring, opens his mouth to say something but is quickly interrupted by a very late Steve and Robin.

“Hey, have you seen the latest issue of Subrosa?” Steve asks, harried and out of breath.

You try not to think about the fact that this is the third time this week that the two of them have shown up together and late.

“Yes, we were just talking about it, which you would’ve known if the two of you were on time for once,” Nancy jabs back with no real heat, just the annoyance of an older sister chastising her siblings.

“Hey, don’t blame me, Robin wanted to—” he stops short as soon as his eyes land on you and coughs awkwardly.

“I wanted to stop by the post office,” Robin rushes to say. “It’s Bastille Day and I needed to send a card to my French pen pal, Celine in honor of the occasion.”

“Isn’t Bastille Day in July?” You ask Robin.

She flushes scarlet. “Right, exactly, that’s why this is so important, my card was already like three months late. You know how French people are about punctuality.”

She then exchanges a meaningful glance with Steve and Nancy who seem to be having their own sort of conversation consisting solely of glances and eyebrow movement.

“Fine, whatever,” Nancy exhales after a few terse moments of silent communication, “let’s just start please.”

She stands and the others follow suit. You, however, remain sat, trying to figure out what exactly had just happened.

Steve, sensing you hadn’t moved, turns to throw you an apologetic look over his shoulder before beaconing gently with a nod of his head. You sigh but join him, nonetheless.

This happens a lot.

***

JONATHAN: When the whole staged relationship thing first started, I don’t think any of us had any idea what that meant.  I mean, sure, it started out as the gimmick that got us through the door but it soon became something bigger than that. Their relationship was synonymous with the band and it's success and I'm sure that resulted in a lot of pressure. 

I think for the two of them, though, the most difficult part was trying to keep things professional, especially when other people began to get involved.

***

None of the personal dynamics mattered when you were all playing together.

What you loved most about your bandmates was that they cared about the music just as much as you did. That had become clear from the very first rehearsal and even now, nearly a month in, you’re still in awe watching them all perform alongside you.

 Prim, soft-spoken Nancy turned into a wild thing on the keyboard, her whole body moving with the music, fingers flying over the keys like it was nothing. Ever the perfectionist, she would never miss a note, and on the off chance that she did, curse words you had never heard before streamed out of her mouth, causing your eyes to go wide every time.

Jonathan, too, became something else: full of bravado and fire, hair swinging wildly and even jumping around on stage. His playing had a smoothness to it, he knew when to show restraint and let someone else shine and when to bring it himself.

Argyle and Robin were the biggest transformations, though. Gone was goofy and easy-going Argyle the person and all that was left behind was the laser-focused drummer, who seemed to move on instinct to create a strong musical foundation for the rest of you. Robin, who normally was a bit erratic and all over the place, became the self-assured, quick-thinking driving force behind the band. It was like she knew exactly how the song needed to sound and what each person needed to bring to get there. She was the first to let anyone know there was something amiss and no one took it the wrong way because she was rarely wrong.

Steve and Eddie were exactly what you had expected, however, what you did not expect was how alike they would be. They both moved gracefully and with careless precision. Showmen in equal measures.

Once you had familiarized yourself with your bandmates, figuring out how you fit into the band’s onstage dynamic was easy.

Off-stage was a whole different story.

***

JONATHAN: I mean, yeah, I think it was natural that there was a bit of a divide in those early days between the ‘original’ band and our two new members. It’s not for lack of trying though, it’s just, well the five of us lived in a house together and had known each other for years, it was probably kinda intimidating trying to jump into that dynamic. I also got the feeling that the other two weren’t really used to having friends. They both seemed to have their guards up in their own way.

With her you could tell she was holding back, almost like she was afraid of doing the wrong thing and well, with Eddie… you know how he is.

I think it was that feeling of sort of being on the outside that first drew them together, honestly.

***

Your eyes scan over the small craft services area that makes up part of your rehearsal space. Most of the band starts at one table, chatting amiably over lunch. Before you can even take a step in their direction, though, your eyes zero in on Steve and Robin, whose heads are bent, close together, whispering to one another intimately and you falter.

As much as you enjoyed Robin and Steve individually, watching them interact with one another often stoked an aching loneliness in you that you struggled to put out and the more time you spent with them only made it worse. After six weeks, you were worn thin.

Deciding that you’d rather not foster any unearned feelings, you turn to the only other table where Eddie is sitting alone bent over a thick paperback.

Trying to play it as cool as you can, you reach inside your bag to pull out your own book, and casually sit down across from the long-haired boy.

He stares you down. You raise an eyebrow in response.

“Didn’t know you could read,” he says casually.

“Funny, I was just about to say the same thing about you,” you shoot back with no real bite.

He chuckles to himself, seemingly impressed before gesturing to your book. 

“Didn’t peg you for a Baldwin type either,” Eddie says, eyes scanning the cover of your book.

You shrug, noncommittally, “I found a copy Beal Street sitting with a bunch of junk on my neighbor’s curb and I’ve been a fan since.”

He barks out a laugh so loud it catches everyone’s attention.

Conversation halts and you feel your bandmates’ curious gazes fall on you all at once.

“Forgive me, princess, but I have a hard time imagining you digging through other people's trash for books from what I know of you.”

“And what do you know about me, Eddie? I mean, other than the stuff Subrosa prints.”

His face falls in response.

The two of you spend the rest of your lunch in silence, pretending not to notice the way everyone else is staring.

***

JONATHAN: They ate lunch together every day after that, barely talking, reading their books.  I don’t think they were friends or anything, but I did see them exchange books a few times.

It did stress Nancy out, I think, the divide. It made her think we weren’t doing enough to be “welcoming” to them. Argyle and I didn’t really care, and Robin was dealing with her on shit at the time.

***

ROBIN : Yeah, I was seeing this girl, and I was trying to keep it under wraps from well… everyone actually. Steve was a really great friend though; he would always give me rides to and from her place when I needed them.

***

JONATHAN: ...a nd Steve liked to pretend that he didn’t care but he definitely did.

ROBIN: Of course, Steve cared, are you kidding?

NANCY: We could tell it bothered him.

STEVE : Did I care that she was eating lunch with Munson and kept avoiding me outside of rehearsal? No! Of course not.

***

November 1983, Los Angeles, California

The Downsides’ debut album was released on November 6, 1983, to commercial and critical success.

People immediately took to the upbeat synth sound paired with the introspective and clever lyrics. On top of that, you and Steve were, quite literally the talk of the town.

There were entire articles in gossip magazines dedicated to parsing out details of your relationship from the song lyrics on the album and coming up with theories about what the lyrics were about.

And all of that just from a few pictures of you two holding hands. Starcourt was ecstatic, they had bottled magic.

As much as everyone wanted to celebrate, you weren’t out of the woods yet, there were still the press junkets.

A growing list of TV and radio appearances that the band was required to be at plagued Hopper who was tasked with making sure you were all present and willing at these appearances. And of course, that you didn’t make fools of yourselves or Starcourt.

The label had taken it upon itself to send everyone PR briefings—essentially a long list of things no one should say under any circumstances during interviews.

Normally, you would think a list like this was overkill but knowing some of your bandmates, it was definitely needed.

All the eyes (and the pressure) would be on you and Steve, though, everyone knew that. You two were the ‘It Couple’ everyone wanted to hear from, and you weren’t quite sure what you were going to say.

The pap photos were easy: it was just walking around or sometimes getting lunch, holding hands, and looking like you were enjoying each other’s company. Something that wasn’t difficult since conversation flowed easily between the two of you.  At first, you would talk music—Steve was incredibly dedicated and knowledgeable, you quickly found out—but eventually, the two of you had branched into other topics. You learned about Steve’s life growing up in Indiana, about all his likes and dislikes, and everything about the band. He managed to pull the same information from you and you let him.

Even the physical stuff was easy, with time. In the beginning, it was an experiment of firsts. While you were pretty well-versed in the practice of feigned affection, you were used to the guy always making the first (fake) move. Most of the guys you had been "set up" with were the "act first, ask permission later" type. Steve was polite and considerate to a fault, and it took you two full dates to convince him that he didn't have to ask before holding your hand and an entire week more to work up to the kiss on the cheek. After those conversations though, touching Steve, in one way or another, had become second nature.

So much so, in fact, that it had begun to bleed into your everyday lives. It was not unusual during the time of your re-recording, to be at the studio and have Steve come up from behind you to rest his hand in the gentle dip of your waist only for you to lean back as you inhaled that scent that was uniquely him: smokey sandalwood and hair pomade.

Right around the time rehearsal started you realized that perhaps the two of you were becoming too comfortable with that type of affection, especially given how much time he spent with Robin, and you had begun to keep a subtle distance between the two of you whenever you weren’t on stage.

Steve while intelligent in his own right, had never struck you as the kind of person to pick up on subtleties, so when he brings up this distance you realize that either you severely underestimated his abilities, or you were not as subtle as you thought you’d been.

It’s a few days before the first stop of the Press Tour—An early morning slot with Wake Up, USA! —that has the two of you sitting on your couch when he brings it up. You had invited Steve over to practice answering any possible questions you may have to field together and make sure you’re on the same page.

As it turns out though, outside of music, Steve is not much for rehearsing.

“Can’t we just wing it?” Steve asks as he lies sprawled on your couch.

You huff in response, “No, we can’t just wing it. This is a big deal! This is our first time out as a couple, and we have to be believable.”

Steve scoffs at this and you raise an annoyed eyebrow in response.

“What?”

“Nothing,” he shrugs in response, “it’s just hard to act like a couple when you’ve been avoiding me for, like, the past month.”

He doesn’t sound accusatory or angry when he says this, just matter-of-fact. 

“I haven’t been avoiding you,” you sputter out, weakly.

It’s his turn to raise an incredulous eyebrow at you.

“Really? Could’ve fooled me. Last time I checked you and Eddie weren’t the best of friends, but you’d rather eat lunch with him than the rest of us. You know, if you didn’t like us, you didn’t have to agree to be in the band, we would’ve understood,” he deflates as he says this last sentence and it crumples your heart just a bit.

 “I like you guys,” you say quietly, nudging his leg with your knee as you do.

“Then, is it me?” He asks, voice small and eyes low.

“No, no, it’s not you, Steve,” you rush to say.

“It’s just, I’ve never really been any good at this,” you mumble, shy under his gaze.

“Good at what?” He urges gently.

“At being friends with people.”

You continue, words clunky and difficult to get out, “At being friends with someone I’m also pretending to date.

“I mean, with the rest of the guys Starcourt set me up with, I only had to tolerate them for a few weeks, at most. With us, well who knows right? Plus, I actually like you,” you wince at this uncharacteristic display of vulnerability from yourself, “I like all of you and I don’t want to ruffle any feathers or cross any boundaries and hurt anyone’s feelings.”

He chuckles at this, “Trust me, you won’t hurt my feelings by spending time with me.”

You shake your head, “It’s not you I’m worried about, Steve. There are other people.”

Steve’s brow furrows in confusion, “I’m not following.”

You are not sure what to say, now. You don’t want to call Steve and Robin out, it’s clear that they’ve been trying to keep what they have going on a secret, and you don’t want to call attention to that. You’re also afraid that if you mention him and Robin, you’ll eventually have to explain how when you see them together, your chest gets painfully tight. Pivot, you demand of yourself.

“What I mean to say is, it’s easier for me to keep everything professional when I have a little more space because I’m not really used to this friend thing. I’m sorry if I made you feel like I didn’t like you or the band. I like you all a lot, actually and I guess I’m just worried about messing that up.”

You can feel yourself retract into yourself the more you speak and by the end, your knees are tucked under your chin. You can’t bring yourself to meet Steve’s gaze.

He doesn’t respond right away, but you feel the warmth of his palm spread over the expanse of your back.

“Listen, I think… if this is gonna work, we have to be on each other’s team and part of that is talking to one another, right?  And letting each other know when we're having a hard time. I want to be on your team, will you let me?” His voice swells as he asks, and you are so aware of his warmth next to you.

“Yeah,” you nod, finally meeting his eyes, “ I want to be on your team too if you’ll let me?”

He nods enthusiastically, smiling so brightly you question if the sun has ever been as bright.

“Great, now can we please practice some of these questions?” You demand, playfully. 

“Or, or, and hear me out, we could go get burgers," he offers back.

You end up doing both.

***

November 13, 1983, Sunset Studios, Los Angeles, California

Call time for Wake Up, USA! was insanely early and you don’t think you’ve ever seen an angrier Hopper than one that has to be dealing with Eddie Munson at 5 AM. Eddie is decidedly, not a morning person.

“Well, aren’t you a ray of sunshine today?” You deadpan to the disgruntled guitarist from your makeup chair next to his. You were not fairing much better: not only were you running on little sleep, but you were also wound tightly with nerves about your first live interview as a band and as a couple.

“Can it, Your Majesty, or we might have a case of regicide on our hands,” he warns with no real heat behind his words.

“Isn’t it a bit too early to be throwing big words like that around, Munson?” Steve asks, from his spot on your other side.

“Don’t even know what that means,” he mutters, mostly to you.

“It means the murder of a king or queen,” you respond automatically.

“Doesn’t have to be just one, either. You could always kill more than one monarch at a time,” Eddie raises his eyebrows at Steve as he says this, making his implications very obvious.

“Wow, look at us,” Steve exclaims, grinning, “already making veiled threats at each other. We’ve finally made it, honey.”

He says this last part exclusively to you punctuating it by reaching for your hand and giving it a squeeze and you laugh.

The lightness of the exchange distracts you from your nerves for a moment. And from the way Eddie’s eyes linger on your hand interlaced with Steve’s.

Your brief reprieve is interrupted by the soft thud of a heavy object landing in your lap.

“What’s this?” You hold up a beat-up paperback to the culprit.

Eddie shrugs, “The Two Towers, Dustin finally got it back to me, took his sweet time too, that little asshole.”

You nod. He had lent you the first Lord of the Rings book weeks ago, while you were still in rehearsal after you had shown up bookless one day and you had devoured the book. You had been needling him for the second one since, but he had lent it to the audio engineer’s son, a kid named Dustin who idolized him and Steve in equal measure.

“Thanks,” you say, surprise coloring your voice, thumbing through the pages, eyes hungrily scanning the pages.

***

EDDIE:  I dunno, she seemed nervous.  I thought if she had something to distract her, it might’ve helped.

***

You get through the first chapter of your new book before they pull you into wardrobe.

They outfit you in a light blue dress, with exaggerated sleeves and a belt around your middle to compliment Steve’s dark blue blazer and stripped t-shirt combo.

 You feel your nerves mounting as you are helped into your heels and given your mic pack. Suddenly, everything that is riding on this is suffocating you from all ends—a visceral crushing pain that you can’t shake.

Steve appears at your side and the band had been escorted onto the soundstage your hand has been tightly wrapped around his like a vice the entire time.

“Can you, uh, loosen your grip a bit, please,” Steve asks, finally.

“Right, sorry,” you say, letting go of his hand completely and instead focusing your nervous energy on straightening his lapels.

After the third time you’ve readjusted his collar, Steve grabs both of your hands in his, and pulls you close, giving you no choice but to focus on his face.

“Hey,” he says in a hushed tone, just for you, “you don’t need to worry, okay? We’ve got this. I’m on your team, remember?”

You swallow thickly, and nod, before adding, “And I’m on yours, Harrington.”

“That’s my girl,” he says sealing the exchange with a kiss on the cheek.

***

JONATHAN: That first interview, on Wake Up, USA! was what really sold them. I mean, they couldn’t keep their eyes off of each other the entire time.

And then, when one of the hosts asked them how they met, Steve told this story about seeing her for the first time from across the restaurant during our first lunch together and how he was sure he had made a total fool of himself because he was so nervous to be around someone so beautiful, of course, Steve Harrington would say something like that. The audience swooned. Hell, I swooned a little bit.

And then they asked her about all the guys from her past, which was totally fucked up by the way, but she handled it great. She said she was grateful for all the mistakes she had made in the past because they had led her to The Downsides and to Steve.

Between that interview and our live performance, the audience was hooked. 

***

“Good job, you two,” Hopper says gruffly, patting you and Steve on the shoulder as you're ushered off stage after your performance.

“Thanks,” you squeak out, all the tension slowly deflating from your body after hearing Hopper’s approval.

It was done, your first live appearance complete, and it hadn’t been a total train wreck.

Actually, thinking back, it had been pretty good. There was a good variety of questions; everyone had gotten to speak; and when it came to you and Steve, well, it seemed believable at least. And the band managed to preform the new single without a hitch, all of the kinks that had plagued you during the last few weeks of rehearsals ironed out. 

Maybe you could pull this off after all.

***

By the time the band had wrapped up the week-long press junket, you were exhausted.

What had taken more of a toll than the hours of sitting in makeup chairs, too-tight shoes and repetitive questions was having to pretend with Steve.

You realize now that your problem was never the risk of not being convincing enough, but instead of being too convincing.

You had spent the entire week so physically attached to Steve, that it was beginning to feel like you were one single being. Like he was an appendage you couldn’t move without.

And every kiss on the cheek, every look, every squeeze of your hand, felt like a jumpstart to your heart.

Then there were actual interview parts. Steve was good with the press. He would draw audiences and hosts alike, in as easy as if he was winding up a thread. There was never a question that would catch him off guard and he always came off boyish and genuine in his responses. Like the time he was asked what his favorite thing about you was and he told the story of you showing up at the recording studio with cookies and having the guts to change Eddie’s lyrics in the same afternoon.

You knew better than to ask if he meant it. 

The next day, Hopper called to let you know that your album was breaking all sorts of records, and the label was incredibly pleased. So much so that they were thinking of increasing the tour dates and they were even starting to plan for future projects—projects that they wanted you to write.

The news didn’t make you feel light with joy like you had once hoped it would, instead, it made you feel heavy like a sinking stone.

A few weeks later, when the band went their separate ways for the Christmas break, you all knew something big was coming, you just had no way of knowing what.

***

JONATHAN: Right after New Year, Hopper pulls the band into a meeting in his office. First thing he told us was that they were announcing a tour with twice as many dates as they had originally planned for, demand was that high. Then he said, “From this point on, everything is going to move really quickly, there’s no getting off the ride now.”

NEXT CHAPTER 🥁

Taglist: @rexorangecouny , @persophonekarter

#steve harrington x reader #eddie munson x reader #nancy wheeler #robin buckley #steve harrington #stranger things x reader #eddie munson #eddie munson x you #stranger things fanfiction #stranger things x you #stranger things imagine #jonathan byers

[ofcompasses]

I keep seeing the same silly rhetoric that Peggy Carter wasn't interested in Steve until he physically changed and I just want to clarify that if the woman was only obsessed with his body alone then the following doesn't add up to this narrative:

She's smitten when he wins the flag to get a ride back to base with her. (CA: TFA)

She is attentive, gives attention and leans in when he's speaking in a room. She genuinely cares about what he has to say. (CA: TFA)

When undergoing his transformation she's the only one in the room who screamed for the experiment to be shut down when she heard him yell. To hell with the transformation, she only cared he was safe and well. (CA: TFA)

She continuously addresses him as Steve or Captain Rogers -- 'Captain America' isn't something she acknowledges when it comes to him. She calls him by his name. Because he matters. Not the world's persona. (Throughout the MCU works)

She left the SSR to start S.H.I.E.L.D. with nothing but a picture of skinny Steve. Of all her belongings she saw that being the only thing of importance to keep. (Marvel one shot)

She keeps a picture of skinny Steve on her dresser. She's literally starting her day with him and ending it with him. (Agent Carter)

We know she keeps skinny Steve on her desk as Director of S.H.I.E.L.D., Steve even finds it. (Endgame)

It's clear that Skinny Steve is to Peggy what Steve's Compass with Peggy in is to him. A direction. A reminder. A moral compass.

What I particularly hate about this blatant lie is that it paints Peggy to be this shallow superficial woman when it's the farthest narrative from her actual character both in the comics and in the MCU. It's incredibly clear that certain fandom members love to conjure up lies in an attempt to make their character assassination attempts sound like they hold more validity than they do.

If the above wasn't proof enough I'm going to provide further evidence both from the comics and the Agent Carter TV Series (which half of you clearly haven't watched or else this wouldn't even be a thing to question) that further supports the consistency of Peggy not caring about aesthetics when it comes to who she chooses as a love interest.

Fred Wells: Clearly unequally yoked for Peggy, given Peggy's heart for adventure. When her brother (Michael) tries to dissuade her from going through with marrying him (at their engagement party mind you) Peggy gets confrontational and basically tells Michael to stay out of her business (even though she knew he was right). One thing about Peggy Carter? If she loves you she will defend and stick beside you regardless of the logistics. The only time she then ends things with Fred is after Michael, her brother, dies in service. To honour him she leaves Fred and pursues a career with the SOE (That Michael put her forward for before he passed) that then sets her on the trajectory to work for the SSR and later S.H.I.E.L.D. Peggy, protecting legacies and using her life to honour those gone before her? Sound familiar? Because it didn't start with Steve. It started with Michael Carter, her brother.

Gabe Jones (Comics): Peggy has never cared about physical aesthetics nor has she ever been concerned with how other people perceive her with the partners she chooses for herself. She is one of the first white female characters in the comics to have an interracial romance (Gabe Jones) despite the racist hostility from others. Red Skull quite literally attacks her and Gabe for it (being together). Did Peggy run? No. Because her feelings for the person mattered most.

Jason Wilkes: Seeing this was a beautiful parallel to Peggy in the comics. A black scientist in the '40s who Peggy is BESOTTED with. This woman was risking everything for this man despite the time being rampant with blatant racism. After a comment made by a shop owner, you see Peggy visibly and audibly distressed by Jason's mistreatment. And yes, she defends him.

Daniel Sousa: A disabled veteran. There's a line in Agent Carter where Agent Thompson tells Daniel something along the lines of 'She (Peggy) won't trade in Red, White and Blue (Steve) for an Aluminum crutch'. Alluding that even after Steve's 'death' Peggy wouldn't go for someone perceived as 'less than'. It's a disgusting comment to make. It's incredibly ableist. The joke is on Thompson though because Daniel, Aluminum crutch and all, is who she ultimately chooses.

All this to say, Peggy Carter has many flaws. Her ability to see value in others despite their physicality has never been one of them. She is consistent in her approach to people. She consistently treats them fair, just and with respect across the broad variety of the work she has been featured in.

And yes, it has everything to do with her upbringing and coming of age in an era that didn't value women. Especially considering she was in a male-dominated field where they constantly reminded her of where her place should be and belittled and underestimated her expertise.

Peggy treats people the way she does because she knows how it feels to be on the butt end of people being awful to her. She actively moves throughout the world and considers everyone with kindness because she knows she hasn't always been awarded the same by others.

Circling that back to Steve Rogers. Is it a surprise that she took extra care with him? Especially when he in turn took extra care with her? Paid attention to what she had to say? Valued her opinions and her counsel? The math, maths perfect here. It had nothing to do with what the man looked like.

The better question to those spewing this rhetoric would be why they're so hellbent on making this a thing? Is it because they themselves would be shallow enough to have physicality be a decider on whether they pursued someone or not? Or is it just that they're running with this narrative to try and boost their own problematic faves? Who knows.

Either way, consider this:

If this is your first time learning that Peggy was engaged before CA:TFA, your first time learning she's been in interracial relationships, the first time learning she's been with a disabled veteran, the first time knowing her brother died (or that she even had one at all in the MCU) should tell you, you don't know enough about her character to be blindly forming opinions of her or agreeing with a majority of the fandom who have made it their mission to make her seem awful and evil. Steve wasn't the start of Peggy's character, she has her own history and life before and after him.

Watch the source material. Form your own opinions. Get off the bloody internet.

#peggy carter #agent carter #we support people having opinions in this house #what we don't support is blatant lies and stupidity #hate the woman all you like #don't become a liar in the process #watch the source material and form your own thoughts #these are made-up characters in a made-up world #stop losing sleep over this lmao

[you-cant-spell-subtext-without]

SPN 15x05 and my terrible no good very broken brain:

This episode opens with three girls on a camping trip.  

Two of them end up as fodder for the MOTW.  My first question for you fam - why are there three of them?  This could have been perfectly done with just two friends (and probably cheaper, no) - especially when the two that are killed are barely distinguished after death.  They are just “the friends that were killed.”  

So why three of them?

I am crazy enough to think it’s because they are supposed to - in this opening scene - represent another trifecta of people.

yup.  the three girls in the intro scene of 15x05 Proverbs are a irl representation of J2M.  

In case you are doubting me, please know that this episode was directed by Sp8 and write by Steve Yockey (RIP*).

*please note Yockey is alive.  this is a joke.  TY please do not send him condolences on twitter god bles

Let’s look at the dialogue and overanalyze it, under the cut ;). Also, a hat that’s not tin (but actually is).

Here is my theory about each girl; I’ll splice it with the opening dialogue for a treat.

JULIE Okay, okay, okay, okay. Spiced rum with cinnamon. I infused it myself.

Julie = Jared.

FRIEND Bet she learnt that from a podcast.

“Friend” [who is never named]  = Jensen.

[don’t tell me homie doesn’t have a hat thing.  he does.  and so does this random character they didn’t need to even include.  THEY DIDN’T EVEN GIVE HER A NAME THEY JUST WANTED HER TO BE THERE.  IN A HAT.  TO REPRESENT JACKLES.]

JULIE Yes. Yes, I did. And you’re welcome.

***tell me that’s not from an actual J2 panel

FRIEND To our annual camping trip.

***our annual camping trip = 11 total years/seasons of SPN filmed with J2M

JULIE To eleven years of not dying from exposure.

*** to eleven full years/seasons of SPN with all three actors not being canceled.

ASHLEY To our last camping trip.

*** to our last season of the show.

also, and finally - saved the best for last because

Ashley = Misha.

***ANY TIME SPN uses a necktie on a character it is Cas coding (or in this case...Misha coding ;)) 

JULIE Oh God, Ashley. Way to be a downer.

FRIEND We just graduated from college. Can’t we just celebrate that?

ASHLEY Yeah, but you two got jobs. 

***Jared = Walker.  Jensen = The Boys

ASHLEY You’re both leaving. I… have a philosophy degree. And I drive Uber.

*** Misha’s college area of study was social theory. 

Social theories are analytical frameworks, or paradigms, that are used to study and interpret social phenomena.[1] A tool used by social scientists, social theories relate to historical debates over the validity and reliability of different methodologies (e.g. positivism and antipositivism), the primacy of either structure or agency, as well as the relationship between contingency and necessity. 

sure sounds similar to philosophy to me.  The Uber is clearly a joke ;) 

-> all of this NOT TO HATE ON MISHA (firstly, that is my best friend so) - but to say that this directly parallels the trajectories of the three actors after the show.  2 had immediate acting gigs following.  1 did not.  

Of course, not having an immediate acting job IMO was something Misha did intentionally (gauged by his discussions of it on social media, cameo, and cons and also this line ->)

JULIE Well, you did that to yourself.

[ASHLEY glares at JULIE. The other FRIEND looks at JULIE before looking at ASHLEY.]

FRIEND She means you picked a harder road. You’ll find something.

***which member of J2M constantly validates and supports Misha?

JULIE Just drink the rum. It’ll help.

ok, Jared ;)

The girls then hear the C/W a noise outside.

- Jared/Julie is taken first - Jensen/Friend is taken second - only Misha/Ashley remains.

BONUS?  Here’s what the MOTW/werewolf/C*W tells “Ashley” in exchange for leaving her alive.

ANDY (werewolf)

You saw what we did to your friends, right?  Tell anyone about this… you’ll get worse.

(LATER ASHLEY IS FOUND GAGGED AND TIED TO A CHAIR)

I’m not saying C/W sniper but also I’m saying [gunshots].

Because as y’all know:

#im sorry about this #literally turned it on 'casually' while brushing my teeth and had a meltdown #spn #my spn meta #spn season 15 #my-pie #supernatural #destiel #deancas #hellerism #spn cast

[plaid-shirtsandvibranium-arms]

There’s More Than One Way To Start An Apocalypse (11)

Summary: The Infinity War had happened and Thanos had won. 5 years later the Avengers try one last crazy idea to save everyone they lost, but a mysterious woman with a Supernatural background from Natasha’s past drops in unexpectedly derailing their plans. They soon find out that Thanos was now not the apocalypse they needed to stop.

Fandoms: Avengers, Supernatural

Pairings: Steve Rogers x Reader, Dean Winchester x Reader (previous), Natasha Romanoff x Reader (previous)

Warnings: Angst, The Damn Snap, mentions of depression and self-loathing, excessive and sometimes unnecessary violence, gore, mentions of death, copious amounts of blood, some profanity as per usual, mentions of past trauma, idiotic decision making, angst, major character death/s

A/N: Thank you to everyone who has shown their support for this series. I can’t believe I’ve reached 50 followers just for my little stories. I can’t thank you guys enough. I’m thinking how we will celebrate this. Maybe through some drabbles for this story or some requested prompts?

P.S.  What have I done???

Masterlist

11: Uninvited Visitors

You were walking down the hallway of the Bunker toward the war room with a beer in your hand. You and the super soldiers had just arrived and you had tucked the werewolf you brought back from the mission in the dungeon. You noticed the blood on your hand when you took a sip of your beer and wiped it off on your jeans, your souvenir had put up a fight upon arrival. You were honestly dead tired and all you wanted was a hot bath and to sleep for at least three days. The last thing you wanted was to have a debrief and you hoped this was not the start of Sam requiring you to file mission reports. You had half a mind to ignore Tony's order, but Sam insisted on it too.

Turning the corner you abruptly halted mid drink when you saw everyone gathered around the large table with their eyes boring into you. You were surprised to see Dean, Natasha, and Wilson were already there. They were still wearing the same clothes they left in so they could not have been here long. Even Castiel had returned.

You looked at each one of their serious expressions and sighed before approaching the table. "Guess I'm going to need a stronger drink."

Wanda wordlessly placed a glass of whisky with ice in front of you. You emptied it in one gulp and she was quick to refill it higher this time. You nodded your thanks.

"Since we're all here now. Dean?" Tony said tilting his head toward a sour looking Dean.

"Prophet is tied up in the infirmary. Unconscious," he started and held his palms up and pointed at Natasha when they all stared at him with accusations in their eyes. "Hey. She's the one who knocked him out. Three times."

"It was a long drive," Natasha huffed. "He was annoying."

Dean agreed casually which surprised you because as far as you knew they were not getting along. He winced as he rolled his shoulder before continuing with his report. "We didn't gag him though so don't get too close. I wouldn't put it past the son of a bitch to bite. We'll talk to him in the morning."

"Good. Peaches?" Tony said all business.

You took a long sip of the hard liquor and appreciated the burn down your throat. "Werewolf we brought home is neutralized in the dungeon."

"And by neutralized?" he prompted you. You swallowed knowing there was a scolding coming your way.

"Meaning I sucked out Michael's grace from in him and now he's just a regular dog. Leashed him up in silver," you said.

"Hold on. Michael's grace?" The vein in Dean's neck looked about ready to explode. He looked to Cas for confirmation who quickly rounded the table to stand in front of you and put his hand gently over your cheek. There was a quick flash of white light where he touched you and the frown on his face deepened.

"That's definitely Michael's grace. He must be feeding his followers with his grace so that it eliminates their vulnerabilities. That would explain why silver had no effect on them," the angel reported.

"So you're telling me you went head first into a pack of grace powered werewolves?" Dean was looking at you with fire in his eyes.

"There was a demon too."

"It possessed Steve."

"Sera stabbed him with a demon blade to get it out."

The rest quickly filled in the other details you were hesitant to voice. Snitches, you thought bitterly. Dean kept his glare trained on you while Nat carefully checked Steve. The silence from both of them was worse. Yelling from either of them you were used to, but the silence was unnerving.

You squeezed your eyes shut and cursed under your breath. You did not need to be told that there was a million ways that whole mission could have gone sideways. Grace powered monsters were not the norm and you were not prepared for a demon. You were already angry at yourself about that and you should have known better.

"You good?" Dean grunted at Steve.

"I'm fine," Steve said and then repeated it more firmly to an unhappy looking Tony. "She improvised in a situation where it was necessary."

"All right. I guess we're cool," Dean shrugged easily, but tossed a questioning look at Natasha.

"We're cool," Natasha confirmed.

What the damn hell was happening? It was one thing for Steve to defend your recklessness, but it was a whole other thing altogether for neither Natasha nor Dean to give you hell for it. Did you somehow slip unknowingly across a rift and into one of the alternate universes? You were so confused.

Tony groaned loudly and pointed a finger at you. "Fine, but warn me next time you decide friendly fire is the plan."

You nodded immediately just wanting to end this weird conversation. "Anything else?"

Natasha then suddenly stood and pulled you into a suffocating hug. You froze in confusion as you did not understand what warranted this kind of reaction from her.

"What?" you tried to ask but it was muffled by her shoulder. You seriously considered that maybe you were put under by a djin. You quickly ran through scenarios on how to kill yourself to release you from the hallucination.

"I'm so sorry, Y/N," she whispered in Russian her voice thick with tears wanting to be shed. "I'm sorry you had to bear my pain and I'm sorry you had to take things into your own hands."

She held you tighter still. "Thank you, Y/N."

Your eyes searched for Dean's and narrowed once you did. "You told her, didn't you?" You looked at the others and saw the same look that Natasha probably had. You were unfortunately not under a djin's influence. "Oh for fucks sake. You told all of them?"

Your glare transferred over to Sam when you realized how they could have all found out without you knowing. "You cut off my comms on purpose, didn't you?" Sam had the decency to lower his head and look chastised.

When Natasha released you, you were spun around to face Tony who placed one hand on your shoulder and the other on top of your head.

"I owe you one, peaches," he said solemnly before ruffling your hair.

The next few minutes was a little awkward with each of the Avengers saying their thanks to you. In this line of work you did not hear gratitude a lot especially for someone like you who always worked in the shadows. It was nice. It felt like you had a purpose beyond just being someone's weapon. It made you feel validated, proud even. The weight on your shoulders strangely lifted and you felt just a bit grateful toward Dean for telling them.

"I think we can all agree that we earned a night off. Let's start fresh tomorrow with the werewolf and the prophet," Sam suggested which everyone agreed to automatically.

Dean caught up with you as you left for your room, throwing an arm around your shoulder. You looked up at him with a question burning in your eyes.

"No, I didn't tell him about that," he said lowly. You nodded and continued your way to your rooms. You really needed to sleep for a few days.

## —— ## —– ##   

"Wanda and Nat are with the werewolf interrogating him. I sent in Jack with the prophet in case he has better luck. Asshole won't say a word to me," Dean scowled as he stared at the hologram of a map in the war room.

Dean was old school. He liked maps he could touch and draw on with a marker, classic cars and weapons, and even digging through countless books on lore. That was how he grew up in this life and it was familiar to him, but he appreciated Tony's upgrades. He especially liked the map that would alert them when a news article or law enforcement bulletin had a potential for a hunt.

Sam on the other hand, took to the new technology immediately. He greatly appreciated the fact that all their research, files, and lore were now digital. It saved him a ton of time with research and he still could not get over his excitement for FRIDAY. His favorite though was when they had converted their simple firing range into a monster simulation room.

Dean was feeling antsy. It had been nearly a week since you all got back and you had no leads on how to defeat Michael. No Hand of God to wield, Archangel blade you can stab him with, and you also had no way to throw him in The Cage. You were all stuck and pitting your hopes on the werewolf and prophet. Something had to break.

You, Steve, and Bruce had left for Wakanda early this morning after Princess Shuri had called saying she might have found a solution to your lack of grace. He was uneasy that you were not by his side, fearing the worst after you had ran off by yourself to save the world. They hadn't even figured out how you were alive right now since Castiel had told you all that he sensed neither grace nor soul in you. Doesn't that technically make you a zombie? Dean was getting a migraine from all the thinking.

"She'll be fine," Tony said not taking his eyes off the monitors and continuing to type furiously. He paused for a moment to scratch absent-mindedly around the area of his fresh anti-demon possession tattoo. "She's with Captain America and the Hulk. That's a pretty good escort if you ask me."

Dean snorted and his frown got deeper. Tony noticed this and his own face broke out into a knowing teasing smirk.

"Or is that what's bothering you? That Capsicle is with her?" he laughed when Dean's jaw twitched. "What's going on between you and peaches anyway?"

"None of your business. Are you doing anything useful?" Dean huffed trying to change the topic.

It was Tony's turn to snort. "Of course I'm doing something useful. I just entered a new searching algorithm for the satellites from the analysis I did on Michael's grace from Sera. It should be able to pin point the location of any entities with these properties."

"Does it work?" Sam stood closer obviously getting excited. This could be the break they needed. They might not know specifically what Michael is planning but they can at least monitor where he and his followers are.

"In theory," Tony said as he pointed to his keyboard. "Wanna take it for a test run?"

Tony liked Sam. He had an intelligence and curiosity that the billionaire appreciated. There was a certain way that Sam's mind worked through all the lore that he had absorbed through the years and pieced them together which Tony found fascinating. It had also amused him how excited he got each time he was introduced to new tech. Sam was like a big puppy dog. Who doesn't love a big puppy dog?

The taller Winchester practically skipped around the table to stand beside Tony with his index finger raised. Tony chuckled and Dean rolled his eyes at his brother's theatrics. With one last giddy smile, Sam pressed the button to run the program.

For a second nothing happened as the system tried to run the code Tony built. The three boys pressed each of their faces closer to the monitors anticipating the results. Gradually, small blue dots began to appear on the screen. Some were isolated while the others were clustered together. Their eyes widened as the dots began to increase and cover more of the map.

"Michael's been a busy boy," Tony murmured as he dropped himself on the chair and cupped his face in his palms. The Archangel was obviously succeeding in his objective to raise an army while your team still had nothing to go on. You were all running out of time. Pretty soon, Michael would make his move.

"Hey Tony?" Dean prompted. Tony merely hummed his acknowledgement, his brain running a million miles a minute trying to figure out a plan. "How do we know which one is Michael?"

"It should be the biggest blue dot since he has the most grace," Tony answered distractedly. "Why?"

Dean gulped and his palms grew slippery with sweat as he reached for the angel blade tucked in his jeans. Sam also slowly rose from crouching on the table, his hand sliding gradually toward the gun he kept on the bookcase behind him.

"Because either your program is broken," Dean said walking deliberately to stand in between Tony and the main entrance. Sam cocked his gun and aimed it steadily ahead, his whole body tense.

"Or he's right outside our door."

A loud explosion and the splintering of the heavy main door shocked them all and threw them back. The sheer force of the raw power it took to tear down the Bunker's door left a high pitched ringing in their ears. The three men tried to scramble to their feet, but before they could recover a large body was thrown from the doorway to land face down on the floor in front of them. A body in a tan trench coat.

"Cas!" Dean shouted, alarmed at his friend's immobility. He continued to desperately chant what was running through his head as he flipped the angel on his back. "Please don't be dead."

A weak low whine and a small furrowing on the angel's brow eased the panic that was squeezing his chest. Castiel was alive. Beaten and bloody, but he was alive. He released the breath he was holding and turned furiously toward the blown doorway.

From the debris stepped through an unfamiliar man, tall and well built with dark chocolate skin that practically glowed with the power he struggled to contain. His chin was square and chiseled with eyes that flashed a bright blue. Though he was in a new vessel, this was without a doubt Michael.

"You didn't really think you could hide long from me, did you?" he said in a deep low drawl, his lips curved in a threat.

"We've been waiting for you actually," Sam bluffed while keeping his gun trained on the Archangel. Michael was unbothered though as he leisurely made his way down the stairs.

"Relax, Sam. I'm just here to pick up a few things," he said as he strolled toward them, his hands behind his back. "Two of them being right there."

All eyes turned toward the hallway to see Jack and the prophet standing there. The nephilim pushed the other behind his back and took a defensive stance. The prophet was visibly shaking, his thin frame trying to contain the terror he was feeling at the presence of this powerful being.

"Hello, Jack. Hello, Sojiero-san," Michael said with a satisfied smile.

"You're not taking them anywhere," Natasha said her cold determined face focused on the enemy as she whipped out her batons crackling with electricity. Wanda, Wilson, and Bucky came to stand beside her effectively shielding Jack and Sojiero.

Michael craned his neck to the side as he scrutinized Wanda. The way his smile curled higher was the single most creepy thing she had ever seen. A cold strip ran down her spine at the way he eyed her.

"This one has great potential in her. I'll take her too," he licked his lips as if to taste the scent of her aura in the air.

"Fuck off, Michael," Wilson spat, squaring his shoulders and aiming his rifle at the intruder.

"Silly humans. I find your determination humorous," Michael chuckled, absolutely relaxed despite the multiple weapons pointed at him.

"I find your face humorous," said Tony as the distinct whirr of his tech pierced the tense situation. His expensive looking watch came apart and reformed on his palm in what was his signature blaster. It powered up with a high pitched tone and shot straight at Michael. It pushed him back a fair bit but only served to aggravate him.

"Jack! Take the prophet and run!" Sam yelled over several gunshots from his gun landing squarely on Michael's chest.

"Take Wanda with you. Go!" Tony yelled, his arms now inch by inch being covered in his Iron Man armor.

"I can help!" Jack protested.

"Go, Jack! Now!" Dean insisted as he charged at Michael who easily swatted him aside.

He did not know what Michael needed the prophet for, but it couldn't be anything good and like hell he was going to hand over Jack. His nephilim power was strong but highly unstable. Wanda had unlimited power within her. They can't risk any of them getting captured now that Michael knows about them.

The quick flutter of wings with their departure prompted everyone else left to go at Michael with everything they had. Bucky and Wilson hung back while unloading all their ammo at the Archangel. It affected him very little but it was piercing his vessel. That meant this vessel was not strong enough to hold him for long. That was their chance.

Sam made a beeline for Castiel and dragged the angel farther from the fight. Dean and Natasha attacked in practiced coordination, the former going for his chest with the angel blade and the latter going for his legs with her batons.

Michael scowled and grabbed Dean by the neck before tossing him across the room, his back slamming hard against the wall. He kicked Natasha in the ribs sending her flying toward the large solid table, she rolled over the top and landed with an ungraceful thud on the other side. Her forehead snapped on the floor drawing blood above her eyebrow.

Michael turned to Bucky and Wilson, slightly waving his hand making them freeze in place. Their eyes widened in horror as they realized they were turning their guns toward each other. Their faces showed their struggle to be released from the compulsion, neither willing to fire at the other.

Tony sent out a few more blasts then which thankfully broke Michael's concentration enough for his hold on Wilson and Bucky to break, but not before shots were fired with one hitting Sam on his side. The other two fell on the floor from the sudden exhaustion of fighting an Archangel's will. Michael was just too strong. How were they supposed to stop him?

Tony was readying another blast at Michael when the sudden pain on both his wrists made him drop to his knees. He stared petrified as he saw the armor crumple around his hands crushing the flesh underneath.

Natasha willed herself to fight through the pain and leaped at Michael, taking his attention from Tony. She bashed her batons at his face shocking the physical body for a moment before following through with a precise roundhouse kick. She quickly landed several punches to his chest and a knee to his gut. Michael made to grab her but she rolled out of the way and crouched just where Dean had dropped his angel blade. She grabbed it and slid down the floor attacking Michael once more by plunging it forcefully at his chest with her full body weight. 

She was horrified when Michael merely turned his head toward her and smirked. The Archangel grasped her wrist tightly in hers preventing her escape. Natasha looked frantically around her teammates who were all incapacitated.

"You're strong-willed. You would make a much better vessel than this one. What do you say? Let me in?"

"Hell no," she answered determinedly through gritted teeth. She attempted a headbutt but Michael easily dodged this.

"Your loss," Michael shrugged.

In one swift movement, he pulled out the angel blade from his chest and thrust it deep through her midsection. Natasha's eyes watered in pain as the life slowly drained out of her. She could vaguely feel the blood drain from her body, but she was growing numb with each passing second.

"Say yes and I can make death go away," Michael whispered in her ear.

Natasha had a moment of weakness, a single second where she considered saying yes to the offer. She did not want to die. She still had plenty of plans she wanted to go through. She had just gotten her family back. She had just gotten you back. Ultimately the thought of you strengthened her resolve one last time before she succumbed to the cold endless darkness with an apology for you the last on her mind.

"No."

Castiel drew the last swipe of the symbol on the lower part of the wall that he could reach, his hand an absolute mess from using his blood to draw and his vision blurry. With his last remaining strength he coursed his grace through his hand and slammed it in the middle of the symbol. A blinding white light drowned the room and banished Michael from the Bunker.

Natasha’s body crumpled to the floor in a pool of her blood with the blade still embedded in her stomach. Her eyes were open but glazed and unresponsive. The warmth on her skin seeping out quickly.

"What the bloody hell did you all do??" the outraged shriek of Rowena boomed through the hall.

Miles away in Wakanda, you collapsed lifelessly with Steve barely catching your head before it hit the cold tile.

Masterlist

#avengers #avengers fic #avengers fanfiction #avengers x supernatural #avengers endgame #supernatural #supernatural fanfiction #supernatural fic #steve x reader #steve rogers fic #dean winchester x reader #steve rogers #steve rogers x reader #dean winchester #dean x reader #natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff #marvel #sam winchester #jack kline #castiel #bucky barnes #sam wilson #tony stark #wanda maximoff #bruce banner #nephilim!reader #nephilim reader #nephilim #angel!reader

[anika-ann]

The 5 Times Steve Felt Betrayed - Pt.2

and the 1 Time He Felt Like He Was Betraying You

Type: mini-series to a series (part 1 & part 2 & Part 3),  Avenger!reader AU.

Pairing: Steve Rogers x reader, Matt Murdock & reader        

Word count: 2600

Summary: Bucky Barnes is a wanted man and you don’t have Steve’s back; ableit for good reasons. And then it gets worse.

Warnings: mentions of terorrist attack, mentions of violence and death, language, angst

A/N: This part of Melting Hearts’ verse follows the events of CA: Civil War, sometimes only referencing them and kinda expecting the readers to know what’s up ;)

Posted in double chapters (1st &2nd time, 3th & 4th, 5th+1)

Previous part

────── ·❆· ──────  

3. (Running to Stand Still)

Back at the hotel after the funeral, another punch straight to his face came; all news channels were broadcasting about an attack in Vienna, exactly where the conference about The Sokovia Accords was taking place. Several people had been killed and the king of Wakanda had been among them.

And they had a suspect: James Buchanan Barnes.

Now Steve was hundred percent sure the world had gone crazy and the universe simply hated him.

“I have to go,” were the first words coming out of his mouth.

You sighed behind him, your fist against your mouth. This was officially the worst day ever.

“And I have to go to work,” Sharon uttered, watching the news as horrified as everyone else in the room. Except for Steve; for him, the tragedy was to be measured on a whole different scale.

“I… I should go to work too.”

Steve’s head snapped to you in shock, his heart positively stopping. Were you… were you gonna come after Bucky too? After Steve’s best friend? Who had clearly nothing to do with this, because he had disappeared from the face of Earth and was definitely not bombing conference rooms with the highest representatives of 117 countries?

Your eyes were a sea of regrets and dilemmas when his accusing glare met with them. It mollified him a little – after all, you didn’t know Bucky. Sure, you heard stories about him, every single one Steve could remember because you were willing to listen, but you weren’t even close to truly knowing his persona.

“I understand, Steve. He’s your friend. He’s done terrible things, but you believe in redemption. I love that about you. And you know I trust your judgement. If you believe this wasn’t him… I trust you. But… I don’t know if I should come with you. With all the tension building up, if I don’t show up at work…”

He pressed his lips into a thin line, not liking it at all; but you were right. They had better chance at getting to Bucky – who might not even be in Vienna for all they knew – if it was just him and Sam coming. Lower profile.

Also, it kinda meant a lot that you were still putting so much trust in his judgement, at least when it came to people’s character.

“You’re right. You should go with Sharon. We don’t know what happens, even if we succeed. I… I can’t ask you to come with me.”

Your expression shifted into a gentle one, the worries softening into something much more affectionate. It surprised him to be honest – and he instantly felt bad for thinking ill of you. He knew you were a kind person. Why was he letting the circumstance make him doubt it?

“You could, Steve. And if I believed I would be helpful, I would come. I know we don’t agree on everything… but the only reason why I’m not coming along is because I believe it’s a way to make it easier for you.”

He gulped, taking a hesitant step towards you. The moment you noticed the tinniest movement of his arms as if he was debating himself whether he should at least hug you goodbye, you threw your smaller arms around him, enveloping him in a warm embrace. Steve closed his eyes at the feeling, welcoming the indescribable relief at the little piece of familiarity in this terrible mess. Having you in his arms always felt right.

“Good luck, Steve. Please, be careful,” you muttered into his suit and he let himself to have a few more moments of peace, pulling you closer so your body could almost merge with his. He took a deep breath with his face nuzzled in your hair, enveloped in everything that was you.

No matter the dispute you two had going on, it felt good to know some things didn’t change and he could find a support in you in the time of crisis after all.

────── ·❆· ──────  

Steve barely managed to step on the breaks and swerve the wheel before he would crash into the debris in full speed. He jumped out of the car, having to sprint in front of the vehicle so it wouldn’t smashed him against the road since it overturned and was now coming his direction uncontrollably.

His escape turned into a chase when he saw a person in what could be a costume (an armour?) of a wild black cat standing over Bucky’s lying figure.

And then he caught a glimpse of a movement coming from above.

You landed gracefully next to the tangled mess of limps of Bucky and the assailant, a mass of ice sending the strange figure flying off Steve’s friend. Steve stopped abruptly since he had no one he wanted to throw off now and for a second, he allowed himself to breathe in. He had no idea where the hell had you come from, but he was eternally grateful. And a little bit scared for you, because he had seen what the metal claws of your opponent could do.

Your hand hit the ground, walls of thick ice shielding you all from cars coming from both directions, slightly curved on the tops to cover you from the sky where the flapping of the approaching helicopter was coming from. The panther figure was not included in your little shelter.

Bucky climbed to his feet, staring at you with his eyes wide in shock. Steve wasn’t any less shocked to be honest – but unlike his friend, he was more baffled at you materializing out of nowhere than your powers.

You all heard the sirens approaching rapidly from behind the icy shield, just like you could hear scratching of the metal claws against your barrier reaching tens feet to your right and left. Steve quickly looked around for the quickest and safest escape route as the loudspeaker-powered voice almost deafened you all.

“You’re surrounded-“

Steve sprung to his right, but he didn’t manage a single step. Columns of ice trapped his legs from the ground, reaching above his knees, his shield knocked out of his hands as he was hit by a burst of your powers. He gasped when he saw Bucky unable to move as well and he shot you a desperately perplexed look.

The wall around them melted just enough for you to come through with your hands above your head – about forty riffles immediately aimed at you, together with Rhodey’s repulsors. You sought a leader of the bust and since you didn’t find anyone else, you spoke to the man in the metal suit.

“They surrender,” you exclaimed firmly. “Don’t shoot.”

Steve glared at your back in disbelief, his adrenalin spiking to dizzying levels. What the hell did you just do?!

Rhodey nodded and you glanced at the man in a black costume, only to see no other than the son of the recently deceased king of Wakanda. Prince T’Challa.

Steve honestly thought this was the weirdest nightmare he had ever dreamed. Except it wasn’t a dream; the walls of ice slowly went down, revealing just how many men were ready to shoot at him and Bucky from both the front and the back.

You slowly lowered your hands, putting them behind your back so the agents could cuff you as well. But Rhodey just patted your back to let you know they were not gonna arrest you.

“Good job, kid.”

You grimaced and looked up at Steve. His eyes glinted behind his mask as he watched you with an emotion you certainly didn’t want to decode.

The shock of the Black Panther revealing his face was nothing. The icy needles cutting into his skin and muscles were nothing.

What burned him the most was your betrayal. Yes, you had iced T’Challa away, but you also stole their last chance to run – and what was worse, you had used your powers against him. Against him. You had done something he had thought terrified you, the memory of giving him a frostbite still haunting you. But here you were, doing what you had done so many years ago – except this time deliberately.

He saw the tears in your eyes, the desperate and torn expression on your face as the agents approached him and you let the ice around his hands melt so he could be cuffed. Then his legs were free too, but he couldn’t care less, feeling frozen from the inside.

What Steve couldn’t see was the three different snipers positioned at the edge of the pillars previously aiming at each of them, now with their guns cracking under the extremely low temperature, and their hands buried in ice. What he hadn’t seen before you let the walls crumble, was the number of men with itchy fingers, now lowering their weapons because the suspects were secured. Blinded by the anger, he couldn’t see a lot of things.

He couldn’t see you had just saved their lives.

────── ·❆· ──────  

4. (Poisoned Words)

Steve knew – he had known the moment you hadn’t gone after him when he had stormed out of the room after the fight with Tony. He had known you had made up your mind a long time ago – and not even the idea of Wanda being practically held prisoner had changed your spirit. He had known when he hadn’t seen you fight after the psychiatrist did something to his best friend – neither the brainwashed escaping Bucky, neither anyone else at the facility.

Yet it still broke his heart when you hadn’t showed up at the airport with Sharon, who had brought their gear. The shield. Falcon’s wings. He should be grateful to Agent Carter, but it still felt as if she had come empty-handed. She didn’t bring the most important item. You. But that wasn’t on her.

“She’s staying with Wanda Maximoff. Keeping her company,” Sharon said simply as if she guessed Steve’s thoughts and he nodded hastily, pretending the incredibly tight knot in his stomach didn’t exist. That he could breathe. That he didn’t want to scream, but could easily draw enough air into his lungs to do so. That he didn’t feel tears prickle in his eyes.

“Thank you, Sharon. I owe you.”

“I’ll put it on the list. Right under this,” she said softly, pulling out an envelope from the inner pocket of her jacket.

Steve sucked in a breath as she held it out for him. Mentally, he let out a sarcastic laugh. A letter. You had left him a letter. Just words. Just like when you had left him the last time when you abandoned him, even for a whole different reason. The last time, you were protecting him; this time, you were protecting yourself.

Steve wondered if this was you laughing to his face. He didn’t even want the stupid piece of paper.

“Thanks, but… if it’s from the person I think it is, I don’t want it.”

That was a lie.

He did want it. He itched to have it. He craved for it, because he would love to hear what you had to say to all this. To him. Were you trying to justify your actions? How? Was it because you truly believed you were so bad in your core? Because your insecurity about you keeping control over your powers rooted so deep? Or because you didn’t believe he was doing the right thing, you didn’t believe his judgement anymore? Were you thinking he was not doing the right thing, saving a man, who had been turned into a weapon against his will, becoming just a tool?

It didn’t matter. You weren’t here.  Whatever you had to tell him, it didn’t seem to matter, because you leaving him in lurch hurt so fucking badly.

He almost jumped when a small hand took his and he snapped from his trance, seeking the point of contact with his gaze. Sharon gently uncurled his fingers, pressing the envelope to his palm. When he met her eyes, they burned with sincerity and seriousness.

“She was very desperate for me to get this to you. She sought me out – because she figured I would come to your aid. Don’t underestimate her, Steve. Don’t judge her. I believe that the letter is truly important.”

Steve sighed, but tugged the envelope into the pocket of his jacket, planning on reading it never. Probably. Maybe someday. Who knew what was next. Who knew if he’d live that long.

Sharon smiled at him reassuringly and helped him to move the equipment to the trunk of their distinctive get-away car. The letter stayed in his jacket, burning with the tinniest hope. Maybe Clint would bring you along with Wanda, since you were staying with her. Maybe…

He didn’t.

He gave Steve an apologetic and pitying look instead; it only made the supersoldier sick. Because now, he was nothing but sure you didn’t give a damn about either him or doing the right thing.

And he had no clue how he had never seen it before. It almost looked like he should be grateful that you hadn’t stopped Clint and Wanda from wandering off at least. God, he had been so stupid—

“Steve-“ Wanda started from behind Clint, her voice sounding urgent,  but from her expression, Steve could tell the matter she wanted to talk about; he just shook his head.

“Good to see you, Wanda. Thank you for coming,” he said with a strained smile, pushing the thoughts of you to the back of his mind. They didn’t have time for his self-pity now.  

She returned the smile hastily, but opened her mouth again to speak.

“Please don’t. Whatever it is, I don’t want to hear it.”

“But you should-”

“Not now,” he opposed sternly, regretting his tone when Wanda winced. “Please,” he said, softer. “Not now, Wanda.”

Clint’s gaze flickered between them, unsure whether he should intervene. Honestly, he wasn’t quite certain what was happening between you and Steve, or how much bad blood the Accords poured between the two of you. He had noticed what could be a brief wordless exchange between you and Wanda at the compound and assumed you had wanted Wanda to send your sorry to Steve. He could understand why Steve didn’t want to hear it, especially now, but that was as far as his knowledge of the situation went.

“Clint, thank you. I wouldn’t call you if I had another choice,” Steve turned to him, a tiny grateful smile on his lips. His face spoke volumes about a lot of things, but Clint could tell the gratitude was genuine. He accepted his hand and shook it.

“Hey, trust me, you’re doing me a favour. And I owe a debt.”

Steve just nodded in acknowledgement when he noticed the tiny gesture towards Wanda.

“Thank you both for having my back.”

“It was time to get off my ass. I know where my loyalty lies. And I’m not the only one,” the Scarlet Witch commented lowly.

It earned her a raised eyebrow from Clint when Steve drew in a sharp breath.

Fuck, that hurt.

Steve would think it was just a slip, but the Sokovian tilted her head to side almost mockingly as if she knew exactly what she had said and was provoking him on purpose. Challenging him for whatever reason. Steve swallowed against the lump suddenly grown in his throat.

“What about our other recruit?”

And with that, the matter of you not coming along was dropped.

Steve wished he could get rid of the thoughts about you and his feelings just as easily.  

────── ·❆· ──────  

Part 3 (the fifth time and the +1)

────── ·❆· ──────  

Thank you for reading!

#fanfiction #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers x you #steve rogers imagine #captain america x reader #captain america x you #captain america imagine #steve rogers fanfiction #melting hearts #avenger reader #mcu #marvel #5 times steve felt betrayed #anika ann

[holyhellpod]

4. Fambily

In this episode, we skim the surface of the fambily dynamics in Supernatural, which are--ah. Dicey at best. 

Apple | Spotify | Google

Transcript under the cut!

Content warnings: domestic violence and family abuse

[Growl]

Ah, the Winchesters. Where do we even start. Unhinged, deranged, and continually traumatised in every way, Sam and Dean complete each other. At least, that’s what the show wants us to think. Despite the ways they betray each other, lie to each other, and  piss each other off, they are fambily. And fambily is the most important thing. The concept of Fambily in the show Supernatural (2005-2020) takes many twists and turns throughout its run. In the first five minutes of episode one, the heteronormative, nuclear family of John, Mary, Sam and Dean is ripped apart by an unknown, antagonistic force that represents all the evil in the world. It creeps into a nursery and eviscerates a white, blonde mother while preying upon a 👶, I mean, how much more evil can you get? It’s fantastic that, in the later seasons especially, Supernatural embraces this idea that fambily doesn’t end in blood, but blood doesn’t always mean fambily. By the end of the series, the fambily concept has expanded to include two dads, an aunt and uncle, and a thirty-year old infant. I’m going to talk about the finale in its own episode, so that my ire will have its proper outlet. 

When the show starts, Sam, Dean and John have each other, and only each other. By the time season 2 really kicks off, Sam and Dean don’t have John anymore, but they do have Bobby Singer. The concept of the triumvirate follows them throughout the series as though they’re in a less sexy Italo Calvino novel—first Sam, Dean and John, then Sam, Dean and Bobby, then Sam, Dean and Ruby, then Sam, Dean and Cas, then Sam, Dean and Mary, then Sam, Dean and Jack. It’s broken in seasons 13-15 when Cas comes back and they have a family of four, and then five when Mary can stand to see her boys.  

But the Winchesters are not the only fambily in Supernatural who matter. In season two, we’re introduced to the Harvelles, mother Ellen and daughter Jo, who are a hunting fambily who run a hunter pub in the middle of whoop whoop. A pub that Eric Kripke famously hated, and rejoiced when he burnt it down at the end of season 2, because the Winchesters and by extension everyone they know aren’t allowed to have anything good ever. It’s revealed in season two episode “No Exit” that John got Jo’s father killed on a hunt, which obviously affects Jo more than it does Sam and Dean. 

[Editing note:] Okay I’m editing this episode, and I’m not happy with it. I’m not going to scrap it completely because I think I do have good points to say, but the general analysis of this episode is so surface level. It is basically contributing nothing to the conversation. And I started this podcast in order to actually contribute something to the culture. I could make a bunch of text posts on tumblr or I could spend hours and hours and hours and hours of my life to something that — I don’t know. Is it bringing me joy? Not at the moment. But, yeah. So I’m not going to scrap this episode completely but this is my way of saying from now on the episodes are going to take as much as they will take and I will commit myself to having deeper and more thoughtful analysis. And if I have to spend an entire episode on one aspect of one thing, I will. I could be at university right now studying a masters or a PhD in fucking literary analysis but instead I’m sitting on my bed making a Supernatural podcast because it brings me joy. It does. It really makes me happy and I don’t want to abandon this project, because people are listening to it. I don’t know why, I don’t know what you like it about it, but you’re listening. And I just think I owe it to myself to make things that I support 100%. So I’ll continue this episode and hopefully this rambling hasn’t put you off it completely. But from now on, I’m going to really, really talk about things that matter in regards to Supernatural… Kind of an oxymoron. Kind of a contradiction. But things that contribute to the cultural consciousness instead of just rehashing the road so far. That’s all I want to do. I want to contribute. I want to say good…ful things. Okay this is making me happy. It’s already working, it’s already making me happy. I’m just going to keep rambling and laughing. Okay so, more thoughtful analysis, deeper analysis. Things that make you think. Things that make me think. Instead of just a bunch of words that mean nothing. Okay, continuing on.

Okay to figure out which episode this was I had to watch a little bit of season two, and I’m still on my season 13 rewatch. The difference between the two seasons. I don’t know if I can even put into words the growth this show has gone through, and the characters have gone through, over the last 15 years. It would be like summarising my own growth by combing through my extensive diary collection and the years of societally- and governmentally-enforced heterosexuality that has plagued my entire life. Those boys are babies in season two. The bootcut jeans alone. Sam is literally 23 years old. I don’t even talk to 23 year olds. I block them on social media.  

The Harvelles are a blip in the Winchester map. While the actors Samantha Ferris and Chad Lindberg did attempt to resuscitate their cultural currency months after the show ended by participating in an event — okay I can’t. I can’t even go into it. Like, clearly Samantha Ferris heard back from her representation as soon as she started posting those tweets and realised she wouldn’t continue to get money if she endorsed, well, the gays. And Chad Lindberg was just using the clout to push his Etsy wares like a 14th century merchant, so I gotta respect the hustle. But Jo and Ellen die in season 5 episode “Abandon All Hope” and are barely mentioned again except the episode Ash appears in, season 5 “Dark side of the moon,” Jo in season 7, “Defending Your Life,” and Ellen in the season 6 episode “My heart will go on.” They didn’t exactly leave what you would call a lasting impact for the next, you know, ten seasons. 

To be honest, I’m not sure when it’s revealed that Bobby’s wife died after being possessed by a demon. It’s made clear in season 5 “Dead Men Don’t Wear Plaid,” and I did not have to look that up, because season four and five are burned into my retinas like a particularly nasty sun flare. Bobby outlines the horrific way he killed his wife, because why not throw some spousal violence into the mix, and later in season 7 “Death’s Door,” it elaborates on their life together. I saw this sentiment expressed on TikTok, which we all know as the foundation of cultural knowledge, which was that fambilies don’t need to be two parents and children. Fambilies can be spouses or partners. You don’t need to have children in order to be a fambily. I think that’s a very nice sentiment and I’ve chosen to adopt it for these purposes. Bobby and his wife Karen are a fambily. While Karen wants kids, Bobby chooses not to have them for fear of becoming like his father and repeating the trauma he inflicted on Bobby. Bobby and Karen’s fambily dynamic is ruptured in the same way that John and Mary’s is—by an intrusive, demonic force that brings Bobby into the hunting world and ends Karen’s life. But by the time we see him at the end of season 1, Bobby is already ingratiated into Sam and Dean’s lives as their surrogate father, and this bond only deepens as the show progresses. Bobby expresses the sentiment to Dean to not be like John, that Dean is already a better man that his father ever was. Isn’t that what we all want to hear? That we have superseded our parents and outgrown them in ways they could never comprehend? Don’t we just want to be better than the generations that came before us, in order to mould a better world for the generations that come after us? Don’t we want to make things easier for our children, and our friends’ children, and our siblings’ children? Dean is a better man than John, and Bobby is better man than his father ever was. It’s about breaking the cycles of intergenerational trauma. I have to believe that Sam, Dean and Bobby did this, because then it’s possible for me to do the same thing. Include here that speech about representation in media that I didn’t bother writing for the last episode. Bobby is the surrogate father to Sam and Dean, a better father than John was, a better hunter even. He crafts an entire network of hunters who report to him, as seen in the season 6 episode “Weekend at Bobby’s,” and he continues to act as Sam and Dean’s mentor until his death in season 7 “How to win friends and influence monsters”. An alternate universe version of Bobby is introduced in season 13, which I have my reservations about, and he and Mary get together, which again, why. Season 13 is so hard to sit through. 

A fambily that is introduced late into the series and is simply NOT given enough screen time is the Banes fambily. In season 12, “Celebrating the life of Asa Fox,” we are introduced to the Banes twins, Max and Alicia, who are by far the most gorgeous hunters we’ve seen in the series. They are hunters raised by a witch, Tasha Banes, who doesn’t appear yet, and they manage to survive the trial by fire that is overcoming the demon Jael. Later in this season, in the episode “Twigs and Twane and Tasha Banes,” both of which are written by the late great Steve Yockey, we are introduced to Tasha in a way that seems awfully familiar: Alicia calls Sam to say their mother has gone missing on a hunt, and hasn’t checked in in a few days. By the end of the episode, Alicia and Tasha are dead, and Max has ostensibly sold his soul for the power to bring Alicia back. The Banes twins’ storyline directly parallels Sam and Dean’s from the pilot, but it’s a tragedy from the outset. We already know Tasha is dead and they can’t save her, however, like Dean does for Sam at the end of season 2, Max chooses to save Alicia at the expense of his own soul. Spin off when. Banes twins series when. I’m waiting. They were in two episodes and I’m still thinking about them. The Harvelles are dust. 

In season 7, “Reading is Fundamental,” a waifish 17 year old honour’s student Kevin Tran breaks into a rehabilitation facility to steal a tablet. This starts a chain of events that ingratiates Kevin Tran in the apocalyptic, death-succumbing world of the Winchesters, starting with Dick Roman, head leviathan, and continuing, but not culminating, with his death at the hands of Gadreel, who was possessing Sam, it’s a whole thing. Any time you attempt to summarise anything on Supernatural, you sound like a lunatic. And I say that as someone who has a supernatural podcast, with an audience of only supernatural fans. We are lunatics, but we’re lunatics together. Kevin’s arc was cut way too short, but we at least got to see him with his momma Linda in the beginnings of season 8 with the unfortunately named episode “What’s up, Tiger Mommy?” It introduces Linda Tran as a capable and worldly woman, hell bent on protecting her son. She offers up her soul among other things in exchange for Kevin and the tablet with him. During the episode, she is possessed by Crowley, and Dean attempts to kill him, which would mean killing Linda as well. Kevin considers this the ultimate betrayal and leaves with his mum. Later in season 9 episode “Captives,” Linda is reintroduced as a captive of Crowley, who escapes with Sam’s help. Back at the bunker, she reunites with Kevin, who is now, thanks to the Winchesters’ incompetence, a ghost 👻. My macbook keeps suggesting little emojis in the smart bar so I just gotta put ‘em in. That’s the last we see of Linda, so I’m drawing my own conclusions about whether she gets to live a long and happy life. Kevin is a fan favourite and despite my reservations about Osric Chau which I will not get into like ever I really like Kevin too. He outsmarts Crowley many times and shows remarkable tenacity to get an impossible job done. His desire to see his mum again, the driving force behind his actions, mirrors Dean’s desperation to have his fambily together again like they used to be. I would call this a parallel but I don’t believe they purposefully did this, I just think they accidentally rehashed the same tired storyline they’ve been peddling since 2005. But yeah, if I was Kevin and all I had was my mum, seeing her again would be the driving force for my actions as well. Kevin’s father is never mentioned, and it honestly isn’t a big deal, which is great. Sometimes fathers are just absent, and you don’t need throw a hissy fit about it or make it your entire personality, Dean.

Missouri Moseley, played by the inimitable Loretta Devine, is introduced in the first season, episode “Home,” in which she helps out on a case involving Sam and Dean’s childhood house. We find out that Missouri is a long-time friend of John’s and helped him to understand that supernatural forces were behind Mary’s death. She is Sam and Dean’s first point of entry into the world of the Supernatural, and they didn’t know it until they meet her in “Home”. In season 13 episode “Patience,” another layer to Missouri’s character is added with the advent of her family: estranged son James and granddaughter Patience Turner, who is also a psychic. We get a lot of backstory for Missouri in this episode, even if it is sloppily written and contradictory to the way they initially set her up. If Missouri and James had been travelling when he was a child, why was she stationed in Lawrence in both 1983 and 2005? What did he mean that Missouri was hunting? I can’t be bothered unpacking the confusing bits of information presented in this episode. It’s not a good episode and I really don’t see why everyone goes apeshit for Bobo Berens. He kills Missouri in this episode, in a really horrible way. Like the history of Supernatural’s racism and misogyny should not be dumped on one man, but nor should it be perpetuated and it is continually throughout the entire show. Confusing, contradictory and badly written backstory aside, she is an interesting character, and her willingness to sacrifice herself to save her family echoes that of Mary in “Home”. I’m actually really mad that Patience never gets to have a relationship with Missouri, and later in season 13 episode “The Bad Place,” Patience’s father tells her that if she leaves to help The Winchesters and uses her psychic abilities, she’s not welcome back in his house. To me that’s just unnecessary. We have a family that has already been ruptured by the death of Patience’s mother, further ruptured by Patience’s father cutting off contact with Missouri, and then to go a step further he disintegrates their family unit by kicking Patience out. Like how much loss do the Moseley-Turners have to endure? It’s really just cruel at this point. But Patience does find family with Jodie, Donna, Claire, Alex and eventually Kaia, and while I love the concept of found family and this found family in particular, it comes at the expense of biological family, which is something that the show has pushed from the very first episode. So that’s evolution in itself. Going from “fambily is the most important thing to these characters” to “found fambily is where we find love” is great, but ripping apart a biological fambily like the Moseley-Turners, and indeed starting the episode by saying Missouri has been shunted out of her son and granddaughter’s lives for trying to bring her son comfort, is just fucked. Like, I couldn’t name a single Bobo episode that I actually like without having to comb through them. I’m trying really hard not to shit all over him because as a writer I know how much that sucks and I know how hard is it for any marginalised writers to get a start, but I’m allowed to have my vendettas. 

If you’ve watched the “Runs In The Family” angels MV from 2010, and only if you’ve watched the “Runs In The Family” angels MV from 2010, you will understand just how jacked up the angel family really is. The angelic counterpoint to Sam and Dean are the archangels Lucifer and Michael. We are introduced to two different versions of Michael—one in season 5, who possesses their dad in 1979 and their brother Adam in 2010—my god that was literally over a decade ago—and Apocalypse World Michael, played by four different actors: Felisha Terrell, Christian Keyes, Jensen Ackles, and Ruth Connell, who plays Rowena. I don’t know what in the hell Jensen Ackles was doing performance-wise when playing Michael, but I consider it a federal crime akin to drug trafficking or money laundering. As for Christian Keyes playing Michael, Andrew Dabb, you know what you did and you’re going to have to live with that.  

In season 5, during the apocalypse, Michael and Lucifer only interact in the last episode, “Swan Song,” but the entire season is built around their conflict. Lucifer disobeyed their father, and Michael as God’s most powerful weapon must defeat him. It’s meant to mirror Sam’s descent into, uhhhh, badness or something, disobeying John to run away to Stanford, or, like, drinking demon blood? It’s unclear. Lucifer and Apocalypse World Michael interact in season 13, and Michael kills Lucifer only to take over Dean’s body and start a season-long arc of, like, bad acting and barely thought-out plots. I would say to Jensen Ackles “don’t quit your day job,” but this is literally his day job. 

The angels as they’re introduced in season 4 are warriors of god, and all they know is obedience and killing. Even Cas can’t break out of the cycle of killing his angel siblings, and often justifies it by saying that it’s for the greater good, that he needs to do it to take down a stronger force like Raphael or Metatron. Anna manages to break free of her family by falling and becoming human, but when Cas betrays her and the angels capture her, she is lobotomised, tortured and sent back out to kill Sam. Then she’s burned to a crisp by Michael possessing John, not the last time a woman would burn to death on this show. The angels are dysfunctional at best, and actively hostile to each other, especially Castiel, the infamous spanner in the works. I could write an entire academic paper about how the angels think of Castiel as this rebel slut who murdered his way to the top and is going to be the downfall of angel kind, but Dean thinks of him as this little nerdy guy with a harp he carries around in his back pocket. Which honestly Cas would love because he’s obsessed with Dean and wants to touch his butt. I don’t know what else I can say about the angels without turning this into a dissertation, so I’ll continue on.

While all seasons of the show are about family, season six is especially about matrilineal family. It introduces the concept of the mother of monsters—Eve—and focuses on Mary as a solution to the loneliness the characters feel after her death. Samuel Campbell, Mary’s father, is brought back to life and manipulated by the promise of seeing his daughter again. He asks Sam and Dean what they wouldn’t do to see Mary again, which is kind of the general thesis of the show. What wouldn’t John, Dean and Sam do for each other? Dean sells his soul. John makes a deal with the demon who killed Mary. Sam teams up with Ruby to kill Lilith in revenge, which begins as a suicide mission because he doesn’t know how to handle his grief for Dean. The difference is that Samuel betrays Sam and Dean, his own grandchildren, for the promise of seeing Mary again. This cardinal sin alienates him from being a good guy, because good guys never betray Sam and Dean. Sam and Dean are our protagonists! Our heroes! The bringers of the light! The knights in shining armour! The white on rice. The cherry in cherry pie. They are the ones we’re meant to align ourselves with, because it’s their story the narrative is telling. And anyone who doesn’t align themselves with the Winchesters is an enemy who needs to be defeated.   

We’re introduced to the character of Gwen in the first episode of season 6, “Exile on Main Street”, and she says in the episode “Family Matters” that Samuel, the patriarch, doesn’t like her very much because she reminds him of Mary. While Samuel, Christian, Gwen and co are technically family, Dean has no connection to them past bloodlines. And as I said before, while family doesn’t end in blood, we learn throughout this season that blood doesn’t always mean family. Gwen dies in the episode “And Then There Were None,” because of course she does, and Mary doesn’t come back, at least not in this season. 

In “Family Matters,” the alpha vampire, played by the irreplaceable Rick Worthy, mentions that “we all have our mothers,” referring to Eve, the mother of monsters, the one who spawned every other monster and who has been trapped in purgatory ever since. Eve is pulled from Purgatory to wage war against the hunters and Crowley because they have been preying on her first borns, the alphas. I love Eve. I love her. She’s my favourite villain after Metatron. Mainly because I think she is like… sexy as hell. Like wow I am just so attracted to Julia Maxwell and this, like, bored smokey affect thing she does where she barely moves her mouth when she speaks and her strong brow makes her seem so intimidating. I don’t know anything about her personally, but I feel like she would’ve bullied me in high school, and I’m into it. It’s really hard to judge just from this one role whether she’s a good actor because Eve has such limited range and few things to do, but I really wish she’d gotten more screen time. Yeah, she’s doing the bare minimum and I’m completely obsessed. But Eve isn’t just a monster, she’s literally THEE milf. The original milf. And I really think she should’ve stayed around, but since they kept Lisa alive they had to kill at least one high profile woman. 

Continuing with the family storylines in season 6, Dean tries to establish a family with Lisa and Ben, and for the most part succeeds. He gets a job, plays the role of the doting boyfriend and stepfather, and protects them as best he can. I’m going to spare you the rant perched at the tip of my tongue about how this is at best a lavender marriage or staying together for the kid, and that Lisa only exists to be an ideal for Dean, not an actual partner he can grow with throughout the rest of the show. It’s his first attempt at a fambily outside of Sam, Bobby and John, and it fails miserably because Lisa isn’t a good match. The fact is, she will never be able to fit into the hunting world because of the way the writers wrote her—as mother and girlfriend archetype, and we’ve seen how well they do with those—in fact they actively paralleled it in “Exile on Main Street” where they had Dean hallucinate Azazel coming back and pinning Lisa to the ceiling. It couldn’t be more obvious that they don’t respect her. At least they didn’t fridge her for Dean’s man pain. It’s honestly horrible because Dean put so much effort into believing this was his one chance at happiness, and when it crumbles like a tim tam in hot tea he beats himself up for it and uses it as an excuse to never be happy. 

He does seem to be happy for the most part with Lisa, but because Sera Gamble doesn’t know how to write interesting or complex female characters, when Sam reenters the picture it once again becomes about the original premise: two brothers on the road, fighting the forces of evil. There’s no room for any women in that sphere. Up until this point I think—correct me if I’m wrong—there has been one female hunter who survived, and she was in one episode. The hunter Tamara in season 3 “The Magnificent Seven,” whose husband died in maybe the most sadistic way anyone has died on this show. Don’t rewatch it, just google it. All women die, including Mary, their mother, who is brought back in season 12 and killed in season 14. AND FOR WHAT? For WHAT Andrew Dabb.

Often, the loss of a parent, child or significant other is used to excuse bad behaviour and terrible choices. The hunting life causes Mary’s whole family to die before she can escape it, and because she makes a deal with Azazel for John’s life, the same demon John makes a deal with, Azazel kills her anyway. John abused his kids and brought them into the hunting life, because he was obsessed with getting revenge for Mary’s death. Sam does the same thing when Jess dies in the first season, and it starts a 15-season long arc of pain and misery. He sets Lucifer free in the season four because he is obsessed with getting revenge for Dean’s death and obsessed with the power drinking demon blood gives him. Then again, Sam is actually right for saving people by exorcising demons, which is literally the first part of the family business motto,  instead of just gutting them with the demon knife, but because Dean doesn’t agree with it, it’s bad. Sam always wants to do the right thing, he just gets a little caught up in the details. But you know what? Bloodfreak rights. 

When Cas dies in season 13, Dean is so overcome with grief, a grief that echoes John and Sam’s, that he mistreats Jack and threatens to kill him. In season 14, Nick, Lucifer’s vessel, boo snore hiss, kills everyone involved with the murder of his wife and child before he finds out that it’s actually Lucifer’s doing, and then he tries to raise Lucifer from the empty because he’s addicted to killing? Whatever, stop employing Mark Pellegrino. Stop writing men as obsessed with getting revenge 

The biological fambilies in Supernatural suck shit. Honestly every time I watch an episode about fambily I’m even more glad I don’t talk to mine. Dean and Sam need to spend some time away from each other, while they’re both still alive. Their fambily dynamic gets better as the show progresses, and I was pleased to see in season 12 that they do away with the codependency, constantly sacrificing themselves for each other, isolating themselves, betraying everyone they know for each other—they started to act like, you know, normal people. And that’s good. Sure, the show would not be anywhere without John sacrificing himself for Dean, and Dean sacrificing himself for Sam, and honestly that’s what made those first few seasons amazing. But after a while it becomes lazy writing, not parallels. A parallel that Supernatural pulled off is Sam comforting Magda in season 12 episode “The Survivor” in the way he needed to be comforted in season 1 and 2 as a psychic child. A parallel is Dean preparing Cas’s body for cremation in season 13  in counterpoint to the way Cas remade Dean’s body in season 4. This show can absolutely do parallels, some of the most beautiful parallels ever put on screen, but the last season was such lazy writing that I cannot forgive it. 

This has been an overall negative episode of Holy Hell, and that sucks. I don’t want to be so negative. I want to talk about the good things that Supernatural did, and share in joy with you all, so now I’m going to talk about the only positive I see with fambily in the entire show. 

For Dean, everyone older than him is a parent to disappoint, and everyone younger than him is a little sibling to protect. Cas is the exception, as there’s no way to define Dean and Cas’s relationship without acknowledging the reciprocal romantic ways they care about each other. Dean says on multiple occasions that Cas is like a brother to him, and that he’s Sam and Dean’s best friend. He actually drops the line, “After Sam and Bobby, you are the closest thing I have to family,” on Cas in season 6, and he acts like it’s nothing, but you can see in the expression on Cas’s face that Dean just recontextualised the entirety of Cas’s being in one sentence. Cas falls for Dean, gives up his family for Dean, and decides to follow him in the first act of free will we see on screen. And Dean, who has never known love without pain, says to Cas, you are fambily to me, I actively choose you, you belong in my life. But to belong in Dean’s life is to follow his plan, and when Cas doesn’t, he is punished for his hubris. Dean loves him, and he never even admits it.

Charlie becomes like a little sister to Dean, as does Jo. Jack is unequivocally Cas’s son, but becomes something of Dean’s son as well and some would argue Sam’s son. Claire becomes Cas’s daughter, but imprints so much on Dean that many, myself included, have come to consider Dean her father as well. If you subscribe to the idea that Dean and Cas are old marrieds, Dean would be Claire and Jack’s stepfather, and they would be a nuclear fambily all on their own. In season 14 “Lebanon,” when John says to Dean that he thought Dean would have settled down with a fambily, Dean says, “I have a fambily.” Just thinking about it gives me goosebumps.

Cas chooses to be a part of Claire’s life in season 10 “The Things We Left Behind” because he feels guilty about what happened to her after he possessed Jimmy, but after getting to know Claire he cares for her. The crime that is Claire and Cas not interacting after season 10, my god. That’s his daughter, you ghouls. But Claire and Dean do get more moments together. Dean, Sam and some British guy save Claire from turning into a werewolf, and Claire and the rest of the Wayward Sisters save Sam and Dean from the Bad Place. The Wayward Sisters are a found fambily all on their own, and since I could devote an entire episode to Jody’s little brood, I have chosen not to talk about them much, because this episode is at least half an hour, 34 minutes, and it would take up too much of my time. Claire is one of my favourite characters and I’ll be talking about her in the next ep, so stay tuned for that. 

Even before Jack is born, Cas becomes his protector. He goes from trying to convince Kelly to end her and Jack’s life, to being her pseudo-husband and the surrogate father to her child. To me personally, it’s the best thing this show has ever done. Cas, Kelly and Jack love each other in a way that is so wholly uncomplicated, that is so pure and so good. Once Cas becomes Jack’s protector, there’s never any question of whether they would hurt or betray each other. He is Cas’s son, his baby boy, and he loves Cas so much that he resurrects Cas from the empty. When they meet for the first time in season 13 “Tombstone” after Cas comes back, they fit into each other’s lives so easily. This is the part in writing this where I was absolutely sobbing my dick off. There are so many moments between them that show the kind of love that each of these characters deserved. Sam and Dean deserve to have that love from their father, and so does Cas. And together they build a family unit around caring for Jack that does indeed end the intergenerational trauma that plagues the Winchester fambily.

And that’s why season 16 is so important to me. I can make things better. Dean sorts his shit out, all of his shit: his alcoholism, depression, ADHD, borderline personality disorder, suicidal ideation, sexuality, gender, the fact that Cas is literally the love of his life and he gets to save him from the Empty the way Cas saved him from Hell. They plant flowers in the field where Dean spread Cas’s ashes in season 13, and they get married at Jody’s cabin with all their loved ones left alive. Claire walks Cas down the aisle and Jack is the flower girl, because he’s literally a three year old baby. Sam and Eileen raise a bunch of rugrats and the Wayward fambily continue the hunting legacy and have a Sunday afternoon roast every week. Dean and Cas raise Jack right, they cut up oranges for soccer practice and watch all his school plays. He and his cousins grow up knowing what it’s like not only to be loved, but to be looked after, to have all their needs met. They grow up normal, and the trauma that plagued their family is a thing of the past. It’s good, you know? It’s just fucking good.

#transcripts #episodes #supernatural #spn

[zandracourt]

And now for something completely personal...

I have unfollowed Misha on social media, which makes me sad. I appreciate anyone who wants to keep talking, but I had to turn it off because Misha’s words tonight were hard to hear from someone I thought had a better understanding of the community he is advocating for. And perhaps what we are seeing is just the reality of being an ally versus actually being part of the community. In the same way that whites just end up sounding defensive and tone deaf when trying to explain why something racist really wasn’t.

My story is of being bi. I have a daughter who is pan, and I am het-married because that happened before I fully understood my bisexuality. I’m out now and I have had F/F experiences, but I have not moved in the world with a full-time female sexual partner, so I don’t know the full weight of queer oppression and I think that is important for people to know.

But what I do know really, really well is what it’s like to not fully understand being bisexual until my late 30s-early 40s because of falling for my best friend. I understand that it takes time to process and even believe in the feelings you have. It can take years. I understand having to come to terms with queerness when you’ve lived your life very convincingly heterosexual. I understand the sense of hypocrisy and denial you feel inside. And I understand what it means to know that a life you might idealize just can’t be the life you live. So I profoundly understand Cas making a confession of love and having Dean not be able to reciprocate, whatever his reason. What I don’t understand is why you took a situation that could have been a true gift to the queer community and literally salt and burn it to ash.

The damage SPN did was in being unwilling to operate from any kind of queer perspective while deliberately using queer tokenism to manipulate a fanbase for profit and longevity. The problem the show cannot escape is that the world has changed tremendously in 15 years. Queer viewers no longer have to accept scraps. We have shows that give us queer characters right up front in many genres. Not saying they all do them well, but representation is higher than it has ever been. And that is exactly why all this schlock by the CW, the desperate attempts by the actors to smooth it all over, and their repeated comments that they just have no idea why everyone is so upset just feels like they are reacting to not being able to continue to use queerness for profit and not out any actual caring for queer people. They just don’t want the bad press and they don’t want to be called out for their homophobia because that damages their reputations. They had a chance to be a landmark in queer storytelling and ended up as a enormous example of everything wrong with homophobic storytelling and queerbaiting.

Destiel is not new. It’s not fringe. And it’s not our fucking imaginations. It’s not. And if you can’t see it, chances are you are hopelessly, painfully straight. You will never get queer stories and I feel bad for you honestly, because the depth and vitality that queer characters and queer romance brings to storytelling is incredible.

Cas loved Dean, yes. And he finally got the courage to say so and promptly died. It DOES. NOT. MATTER. Why he died. It doesn’t matter that we got word he was brought to heaven or that it was written by a gay writer. It IS a bury-your-gays, devastating, repressive, horrible message because Cas never got to be fulfilled as a queer character. He never got to discover how to be queer and find happiness even if Dean doesn’t love him back. He became canonically gay and died within seconds. That is NOT supporting the queer community or queer stories. It’s literally killing them.

As for Dean and whatever he said or didn’t say, again, the conspiracy theories around it demonstrates exactly why people are so upset. Because they were cowards. They were cowards in an era when everyone is fucking done with those who cannot take a stand and instead flounder in the “there are great people on both sides” ethos. It is the same level of GTFO attitude I have for any one who says “gays are fine, as long as they are not gay here”: be that church, a restaurant, on a television set, or any where else. To echo Justice Ginsberg, there will be enough queer stories on TV when they all are. And it is exactly SPN’s fear of “going there” with Destiel YEARS ago that brought them to this miserable end. Destiel only became a risk worth doing when they believed there was no cost to them; when they could kill everyone and never show anyone being queer so they never had to actually deal with queerness at all. After all, Buffy didn’t truly love Spike, but she still told him she loved him and held his hand as he sacrificed himself for her in the final episode. *That* is the trope of a sacrificial romantic death. And now they are paying the price for their lack of integrity to their own show and story telling.

As a final note, I’ve been thinking about the fact that as a fic writer, I’ve had no desire to fix this ending, despite having written many Destiel fics over the years. The embers were still burning on the McDanno dumpster-fire last April when I started to write that fix-it fic and that was my first ever fic in that fandom! That’s how badly I needed to change that ending for myself. After Endgame, I needed better closure for Steve, so I wrote one. But after SPN, I’ve had no desire to write Destiel at all. I haven’t even wanted to read any SPN fics. I have lost my joy for the show and everything attached to it.

I don’t give a shit about CW or most of their programming. I *have* cared about the actors and the fan spaces because there are amazing people there and Misha has been an incredible role model in so many, many ways for not just the fandom, but for human beings in general. Until tonight.

Nina Simone said we all have to learn to get up from the table when love is no longer being served. That was exactly how I felt when I saw Misha’s message on Facebook. He is so much more than this fandom and after some time, I know I will probably follow him again in the future because he is a truly fine person who is doing incredible things in this world. For now, though, I can’t.

So to the network, showrunners, and as painful as it is to say, actors, here’s the hard, cold, truth: Destiel fans have not caused any of this. The show did. And sadly, there is nothing you can do to repair the damage you have done. That is your legacy now and we all have to live with it.

#SPN #Destiel #Misha Collins #TheySilencedYou

[weekendwritingmarathon]

This weekly roundup includes fics written (at least in part) during the 1k1h sprints and/or the Weekend Writing Marathon events.

Fics are ordered first by fandom, then by word count from smallest to largest.

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I’ll Follow You (Around The World) by vexbatch

Good Omens || Crowley/Aziraphale || Teen & up || No major warnings apply || 2,414 words || Complete

Summary: Crowley and Aziraphale meet up, sometime before the end of the world, to have a coffee.

Other tags: fluff, pining, first kiss

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Dancing By Myself (and baby, it’s the electric slide) by vexbatch

Marvel || Clint Barton || Explicit || No major warnings apply || 1,559 words || Complete

Summary: It’s Clint’s birthday, and Natasha actually got him a really nice gift. A really nice gift that he’d like to try out right now, thank you very much.

Other tags: trans clint barton, masturbation, violet wand, pwp

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An Intermission (or two) by @pherryt

Marvel, The Old Guard || none || General || Major Character Death || 1,590 words || Complete

Summary: Two short vignettes focusing on Andy and Bucky (Separately) before the next big story hits: Chapter 1: Andy isn't sure of her usefulness anymore, now that Superheroes are becoming a thing. Chapter 2: Bucky isn't sure of anything at all. Until he is.

Other tags: off screen character death, canon divergent winter soldier, Avengers, Implied/Referenced Torture, Battle of New York, Family, loss of self, Memory Loss

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Outside the World by @pherryt

Marvel || winterhawk (bucky/Clint) || General || No major warnings apply || 4,767 words || Complete

Summary: Bucky doesn't really remember who he is, and what little he does remember is impossible. All his therapists have said so. There's no way he can be who he thinks he is - a character from a children's book. And yet, the world around him just doesn't *feel* right - its too dark, too colorless and doesn't match the vibrancy of his dreams. Dreams he tries to capture both on paper and on his walls. Bucky doesn't have any answers he can count on, just the hat he's kept all these years, but that guy that started following him - as vibrant and eye-catching as the pieces of Bucky's dreams - Well, he just might.

Other tags: Mad Hatter, Cheshire Cat , White Rabbit, March Hare , Wonderland, Amnesia, Lost!Bucky, stranded in another world, Magic, Portals, past self inflicted hurts (but not self harm), Reunions, Riddles, names have power, Protective!Bucky, Sacrifices, allusions to greater conflict, bucky's friends never gave up, Pocket Watch, Top Hat, Recovering Memories, unwonderland, steve rogers, steven strange

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Finding Me (And You) Along the Way by @pherryt

Marvel || winterhawk (Bucky/Clint) with side Steve/Sam || Teen & up || No major warnings apply || 10,031 words || Complete

Summary: When Clint retired - pre-Loki, pre-Avengers - he'd never expected that his leisurely world tour might be joined a couple years later by Captain America's best friend. A best friend who'd gone through things nobody should ever have had to go through and was just trying to find himself again. Even if Clint hadn't already promised Steve to keep an eye out for Bucky, he'd have caved in the direction of helping. There was just something about him...

Other tags: soulmates, soulmate miscommunication, telepathy (sort of) finding yourself, fluff, traveling the world, mutual pining, deaf!clint, retired!clint, nerd!bucky, soft!bucky, canon divergent, post winter soldier, journal, memories, scarf, minor references to nightmares and past abuse

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Square One by @pherryt

Marvel, The Old Guard || nicky/joe (pre Nicky/Joe/Bucky) || Mature || Graphic Descriptions of Violence, Major Character Death || 15,709 words || Complete

Summary: It's been nearly 50 years since James sacrificed himself to save Joe and Nicky from a very Merrick like fate. They had no idea he was about to become a presence in their lives once more, looking almost as young as he had then. James wasn't an immortal, so it should have been impossible, but there he was on the tv, clear as day.

Other tags: Temporary Character Deaths, temporary suicide, On screen suicide, Hurt/Comfort, Healing, identities revealed, Angst, Family, finding sanctuary, There's another one, Hopeful Ending, protective Joe, Protective Nicky, Supportive Andy, supportive Nile, talk about past joe/nicky/bucky, Forgiveness, Winter Soldier, bonding all over again, post winter soldier, canon divergent winter soldier, post old guard, Tired Bucky Barnes

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Not Your Guardian Angel (chapter 21) by @tryslora

Original Fiction (Welcome to PHU) || M/F/F (Shane/Pels/Jess) || Teen & up || Author chooses not to give major warnings || 3,464 / 83,881 words || WIP

Summary: When Pels wakes up, everyone she loves is there. Maybe they can heal from more than just the accident.

Other tags: Magic, College, Guardian Angel, Ghosts, Soulmarks

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Not Your Guardian Angel (chapter 22) by @tryslora

As Above || 3,513 / 87,394 words || WIP

Summary: Jess wants to hug Pels. She wants to confirm that she's alive and well, but... that's something they haven't done yet.

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Under the Surface by @pherryt​

Supernatural || destiny (Dean/Cas/Benny) || Teen & up || No major warnings apply || 25,842 words || Complete

Summary: Dean was kicked out of his pack because he couldn't turn into his wolf, but shifters aren't meant to be alone. He finds a traveling companion in Benny, who's been on the run from his own pack for years and is desperately lonely. It goes well enough, except that Dean keeps getting sick and Benny doesn't know why, so when they find what appears to be an abandoned village, they take refuge - only to find a lone wolf still lives there and he's not too happy to find strangers in his home.

Other tags: Found Family, Shifters, Wolves, Werewolf AU, touch starved, Alone, cast out, Traveling Together, Finding Shelter, Storms, Hurt/Comfort, Sick!Dean, hurt!Dean, Bad Pasts, Fluff and Angst, Pining, Mutual Pining, loner!cas, Magic, spells, Prophecy, Fantasy AU, not a/b/o, Shapeshifting, Domestic

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Wyerd by tryslora

Teen Wolf || Stiles/Derek/Jackson || Teen & up || No major warnings apply || 4,990 words || Complete

Summary: Stiles started writing the webcomic when he was sixteen. At the time, he thought the name was the height of wordplay humor. Now it's been picked up by Netflix for a six episode series covering the first published volume, and starring Derek Hale and Jackson Whittemore. What even is his life?

Other tags: AU-Actors, Comic Artist Stiles, Actor Derek, Actor Jackson, Getting together

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Have you posted a fic recently?  Any active WWM participant can Submit your fic here by midnight EST Wednesday and it will be included on next Friday’s WWM Fic Roundup post.

#wwm fic roundup #good omens #marvel #the old guard #original fiction #welcome to phu #supernatural #teen wolf #fanfic

[nekoannie-chan]

Possesionem part I

Pairing: Brock Rumlow X OFC (Leire Moore).

Word count: 1184 words.

Summary: Is time for the most anticipated charity event of the year: the haunted houses, Leire believed that she could not get the tickets, but everything changed at the last moment, will it be a dream or really something very creepy happened?

Warnings: Angst, some ghost appear, at this moment is not very scary.

A/N: This is my entry to the @jtargaryen18 ‘s Haunted House 2020.

I took inspiration from some movies like “Grave encounters” and “Gonjiam”.

Possesionem means “possession” in Latin.

My native language is Spanish so I wanna improve my writing skills in English if you notice any mistake please let me know and I will correct it.

I don’t give any kind of permission that my fics be posted in other platforms or languages (I translate myself my work) or the use of my graphics (my dividers are included in this), I did them exclusively for my fics, please respect my work and don't steal it. There are some people here who make dividers that anyone can use, mine is not this type, please look for the other's people. The only exception is the ones I gifted 'cuz now belong to someone else. If you find any of my works on a different platform and is not one of my accounts, please let me know. Reblogs and comments are always welcome.

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Marvel's characters (unfortunately), except for the original characters and the story.

Main masterlist.

Add yourself to my taglist here.

My other media where I publish: Ao3, Wattpad, ffnet, TikTok, Instagram, Twitter.

If you like it please vote, comment, and give me feedback to improve my skills and reblog.

Part II

Tags: @sinceimetyou @navybrat817 @angrythingstarlight @shield-agent78

October 28th 

 Leire sighed frustrated had been trying to buy tickets to the haunted house event, for one of the specific houses, however, it continued to appear as sold out, such that in less than five minutes was sold-out on the day went on sale; during all that time you check the website daily in the hope of finding even one.  

She believed that by also working in S.H.I.E.L.D. it would be easier to get tickets, but it was not so, this event together with the Christmas one were among the most anticipated, it was not exclusive for the members of the Organization but was open to the whole public because it was a charity event. From the first time, it was made tickets ran out, everyone wanted to visit the haunted houses of S.H.I.E.L.D. celebrities. 

"Are you still not successful?” Her friend asked her as she gave her some cookies she had gone to buy. 

"Everything is sold out, I can't believe it, and it makes sense to me that the Cap's, the Black Widow’s, Hawkeye’s have run out, but even Coulson's?” 

"I just want to go to the Cap’s... for obvious reasons, but you want to go to the one you know who for other reasons, maybe it would be better if you just tell him your feelings...” 

"Shut up, don't even think about it, I don't want to have any problems...” 

“What do you do?” a voice questioned behind them. 

They turned slowly and saw Brock. 

“Are you planning on going to the event? I remind you that I too will have a haunted house there.” 

"Yeah, we've seen, but everything is sold out.” 

“What house did you want tickets for?” 

"The Ca...” 

"Coulson," her friend replied quickly. 

Leire and Brock looked at her without being able to believe that answer, she turned a glance at Leire's follow what she said.

"Are you looking for tickets to Coulson's house?” Brock inquired in disbeliever. 

"Yes, well you know, he acts like our dad and he insisted so much that we couldn't say no and even if you don't believe it he's a celebrity like you or Steve or the most famous members of our Organization, tickets are sold out too," Leire replied. 

"I'm sure he also has a lot of admirers... they're probably old women, but they're their fans,” her friend supported. 

Brock raised his eyebrows, at that moment he got a message on his mobile phone and left. 

"That was close, he almost listens to us," she whispered when she saw he left.

 October 30th, night 

 Leire was in front of the mirror trying on different costumes, the only one who convinced her was the witch. 

"Who's the baddest witch in town?” 

At that moment your mobile phone started ringing, you saw the screen was your friend. 

"What happened?” 

"Something fantastic, I'll show you early tomorrow, just our plans changed and we won't have to go around the block or look for a Halloween party anymore," then she hung up the call. 

"Then why the hell did you call me if you weren't going to tell me something important?” Leire bluffed and dropped your mobile phone into bed.

 October 31st, morning

 That day there were not going to be any activities in S.H.I.E.L.D., several were going to be busy with the preparations for the charity event. Around ten o'clock in the morning the bell rang, she was your friend, and she seemed very animated. 

"It has to be a fantastic thing for you to be so happy.” 

"You're not going to believe it. Yesterday, before I left Jack gave me a few tickets...“

"Then you come to tell me that you have a date with Rollins, I didn't even know you liked him," Leire interrupted her. 

"No, let me finish telling you, Jack gave me tickets to Brock's haunted house, so you're welcome, I've fixed your life, and I hope as payment at least you get a date with our dear Commander because I'm sure Jack didn't give them to me for no reason, but there's a downside.” 

“What?” 

"The tickets are for the last schedule, maybe he'll drop you off inside the house and he's going to save you.”

 "Leire will come," Jack said. 

Brock looked up to his friend. 

“Did she get the tickets? But she's going to Coulson's.” 

"No, I gave her friend some to come in, we can execute the plan.”

 October 31st, night

 "Are you sure I look good?” Leire asked for the tenth time. 

"I told you to do, I just hope you brought nice underwear," she replied exasperatedly. 

"Hey!” 

Brock had been looking for her all day, he smiled when he saw her lined up to enter, it was not long before she could complete her plan and the only thing she didn't like that her friend had accompanied her, although surely another sacrifice would not be bad for her plans. 

Finally, it was their turn to enter, they began to walk around the place, she did not notice when they separated, she turned to look for her when she was in front of a corridor that was completely dark, called her, but she was not, tried to return, however, everything was dark, lit the light of the mobile phone’s lamp, the place no longer looked the same as she had travelled just a few minutes before, she started calling her friend and also tried to call her, there was simply no answer and it was as if the lines of communication didn't work.

She seemed to listen to Brock, tried to find the place from which she seemed to hear it; however something was not right, the place was beginning to give it chills, something was not right, she started looking for if there was any emergency exit or some door. 

She kept walking, suddenly saw someone in front of her, hastened her step, perhaps she could lead her to the exit. 

"Hey!” she called him, but the other one continued. 

She ran and just as she was going to touch his shoulder, the being turned and she could notice a face that began to deform, screamed and immediately receded, ran down the aisles. 

In another hallway now she found a girl who had a headless teddy bear, she ran again, couldn't believe it, seemed too real or it was very good actors who got it.

She stopped when she noticed an icebox in the middle of the halfway, that made no sense, she approached slowly, was the only way, had to go on or back, however she started running back when she saw a hand start to peek out and then he caught his arm, the skin was exaggeratedly pale as if it belonged to someone dead, it was as if the being was trying to get out of there. 

“Why didn't I bring my gun with me? It would be very useful right now," she thought. 

After ten minutes she finally found one, she hoped that was the exit, however, what she saw when she opened the door left her stunned.  

#JsHauntedHouse2020 #brock rumlow x ofc

[hermywolf]

ranking my favorite characters about random shit part 2

ranking my favorite characters (clarke griffin, dean winchester, fox mulder, rose tyler, newt, kaz brekker, samwise gamgee, charles xavier, bill denbrough, lord asriel, steve rogers, scott mccall, anna milton and barry berkman) about random shit. this is entirely self-indulgent

PART 2 : how many allies do they have/how powerful are their allies. basically how screwed they’d be if they had to rely on their allies to survive

1- DEAN WINCHESTER

yeah believe it or not im putting him before charles or steve. listen, listen; dean just. does this thing. in which he’ll get pretty much anyone on his side after like two conversations. ESPECIALLY incredibly powerful supernatural creatures. i mean he’s got sam, aka the second best hunter on earth, and jack, literally GOD, on his side; then obviously the dean winchester simp squad, castiel, a seraph and commander of garrisons who can get heaven to fight for him; benny, a vampire; crowley, a powerful crossroad demon and the king of hell; amara, literally THE DARKNESS HERSELF, god’s SISTER; and then there’s just SO many others who will fight for him for diverse reasons, rowena, eileen, claire, jody, donna, kaia, mary, anna, gabriel, DEATH HIMSELF was his bitch before billie, then ketch charlie kevin, he’s just got so many allies and so many are some of the most powerful creatures in the universe. i mean, jack, amara and gabriel alone are three of the most powerful beings who have ever existed, as well as billie and the other archangels but all of them are dead, and chuck but he’s also dead and even he would be on dean’s side since dean is his favorite and if it’s an actual life-threatening situation chuck would want the show to keep going. so yeah dean winchester’s got the biggest defense squad imaginable and honestly? good for him, he deserves it

2- CHARLES XAVIER

do i even have to say it? outside of his ability to. you know. literally control minds, he’s also a leader who inspires loyalty and trust, and he’s got all the x-men fighting for him, including jean and logan - and even if we’re being honest some of the brotherhood, i mean especially in the first class timeline, erik and raven would absolutely be on his side. he’s got some of the most powerful mutants of all time ready to fight for his life

3- STEVE ROGERS

I mean he’s the leader of the avengers, man. have you seen the avengers assemble scene? they were fighting against thanos there but don’t try to tell me all of them wouldn’t fight for him. he’s got the falcon, black widow and the winter soldier on his side as well as the SCARLET WITCH, CAPTAIN MARVEL, THOR, do i need to keep going. he’s got a huge reputation and everyone knows and trusts him. and as we can also see in all his movies he inspires loyalty and devotion easily so even with people he doesn’t know he can get himself a loyal army in one well-delivered speech à la captain america

4- KAZ BREKKER

while most of the people on this list (steve, scott, charles, dean, bill, newt, anna) are born leaders who inspire trust and loyalty, kaz is just. really good at blackmail and insanely smart and cruel. and he’s got an insanely scary reputation too. he’s got the crows on his side no matter what, so an amazing spy, the best sharpshooter in ketterdam, a grisha who survived parem, an ex-drüskelle, and a demolition expert; as well as now the entirety of the dregs and inej’s crew, probably. plus, he most likely has leverage on the entirety of ketterdam and more. if he got in real trouble he could probably dig out the years and years of blackmail he got stacked away and get himself allyships with anyone he wants. plus his allies are ruthless, diverse and all strategically selected

5- SCOTT MCCALL

he’s got his entire pack ready to jump to help him anytime. and really when you think about it his pack is so big and diverse, there’s all kinds of creatures/skills ready to help him, plus he’s a true alpha, any werewolf would jump to his aid. I mean let’s look at his pack, stiles, allison, lydia, derek, malia, isaac, kira, hayden, mason, corey, and then of course stilinski, deaton, melissa, chris and peter, i mean even theo... he’s got a huge pack who is extremely loyal to him and they’re all kinds of creatures too, he’s fine

6- ROSE TYLER

everyone loves rose SO much. like obviously the doctor will give his life for her without hesitation but we also got jack, mickey, jackie, and even a bunch of people she met for like a couple episodes like donna or sarah jane immediately loved her. so i think she’s ultimately got some pretty solid allies especially with her father’s wealth and torchwood’s support in the alternate reality

7- CLARKE GRIFFIN

im putting her pretty down because on one hand he’s got very powerful/devoted allies on her side, like bellamy, lexa, roan, nyilah, finn, wells, etc (the key of getting your allies to be entirely devoted and loyal to you is to make at least half of them fall in love with you OR to top them so good they’ll literally put their lives down for you because of how good it was and clarke got that down to an art) BUT they’re also like. all dead. like almost all the people i just listed are dead so. yeah she’s kinda on her own in the end but if we look at early seasons clarke before literally all of them got murdered she had skaikru, azgeda and trikru pretty much in her pocket, so three of the biggest/most technically advanced armies on EARTH ready to fight for her.

8- LORD ASRIEL

now he doesn’t have actual allies per say but he can manage to get pretty much anyone on his side through charisma, threats and promises, so he ends up steadily getting massive support from witches, angels and many others in the books. he can pretty easily get himself a bunch of followers at his side ready to die for his cause.

9-SAMWISE GAMGEE

now listen he does have a pretty solid bunch of allies, aka the entire fellowship, who they, themselves, have a bunch of allies, who have a bunch of allies. i mean homeboi’s got ARAGORN and LEGOLAS and GANDALF on his side all ready to jump to save the tiny hobbits anytime so he’ll be fine.

10- BILL DENBROUGH

he’s immediately got the losers on his side, which is a win because they’re stubborn and annoying enough that they defeated an alien demonic clown. plus they’re quite literally assembled by a divinity to destroy a demon, so they’re the perfect team to kick ass and they’ll risk their lives for each other. plus he’s got a fanbase! people read his books and watch his movies. meaning he’s probably got a pretty big part of stan twt ready to help?? idk man i just think he’ll be fine when it comes to allies

11- NEWT

he’s got the entire glade ready to jump to his aid pretty much at any time, i mean let’s be honest if there’s one person all the gladers would agree on defending it would be.. ok it would be chuck bc he’s a CHILD but otherwise it’d be newt. plus he’s alby’s second in command and even gally likes him and respects him more than he likes and respects most people, which isnt much but hey kudos for the effort. anywho yeah the entire glade would defend him i think

12- ANNA MILTON

she would’ve once had the entirety of heaven at her commands ready to smite anyone who comes close to her but now that she fell and rebelled they all want her dead so. i mean i wish i could say cas would help her but after he betrayed her im not so sure? and the winchesters well idk either, maybe, maybe not, depends whether or not the entire trying-to-kill-sam ordeal happened. gabriel might help her? idk where to put her because i don’t KNOW if cas, dean, gabriel or the angels would help her but if any of them did then even one of these is a pretty solid backup so. idk man

13- FOX MULDER

im only on season 4 but as far as i can see he’s got only scully. which is pretty solid backup, she can kick ass, but still. i guess it’s one of the downsides of everyone thinking you’re batshit insane and having the entire government out to get you because they all LOATHE YOUR GUTS SO MUCH

14- BARRY BERKMAN

I mean dude. he pretty much kills all his friends. like he could ask for chris’s help but umm well he killed him, if he’s in a bad situation oh great he’s got a friend at the police except NO he murdered her. what’s that? fuches? no barry’s literally trying to murder him as of now. sally wouldn’t help him at all. cousineau just found out barry murdered his gf. at MOST he can hope that noho hank will help but i mean he’s not much help tbh i love the guy but he’s kinda useless<3

#hermy posts #ranking my favorite characters about random shit

[reading-writing-revolution]

Heather Cox Richardson:

December 9, 2020 (Wednesday)

Today’s big story remains the loss of our neighbors to Covid-19. Today, our official death count passed the number of those killed in the 9-11 attacks. On that horrific day in 2001, we lost 2977 people to four terrorist attacks. Today, official reports showed 3,140 deaths from Covid-19, the highest single-day toll so far. Hospitals are overwhelmed, our health care workers exhausted.

As the country suffers, Trump has launched a new approach in his attempt to steal the 2020 election. While he has previously insisted that he actually won, and that his “win” must be recognized, this morning he tweeted simply “OVERTURN.” Republican leaders have ducked the question of Trump’s refusal to acknowledge Joe Biden’s win in the election by saying that the president has a right to challenge an election through legal means. Few of them commented on this new attack on our democracy.

Instead, the Republican attorneys general of seventeen states supported a lawsuit Texas has asked the Supreme Court’s permission to file against Georgia, Michigan, Pennsylvania, and Wisconsin, suing them over their voting processes. A majority of voters in those four states voted for Biden, thus giving him their state’s electoral votes and the presidency. The states that want to sue are all Republican-majority states. They are hoping they can get the Supreme Court to allow them to sue, and that it will then agree with their complaint and throw out the votes from those states so the Republican legislatures there can then choose their own electors and give the win to Trump.

Astonishingly, this argument comes from the party that claims to oppose “judicial activism.”

The states that have declared their support for Texas’s lawsuit are: Missouri, Alabama, Arkansas, Florida, Indiana, Kansas, Louisiana, Mississippi, Montana, Nebraska, North Dakota, Oklahoma, South Carolina, South Dakota, Tennessee, Utah, and West Virginia. They are essentially asking the Supreme Court to disfranchise the majority in the United States and to let them put their chosen president in the White House. This assault on American principles is breathtaking.

Trump has also filed a motion to join Texas’s lawsuit in his personal capacity as a presidential candidate. His lawyer says that he “seeks to have the votes cast in the Defendant States unlawfully for his opponent to be deemed invalid.” Tonight, at a White House Hanukkah party, Trump told the crowd that with the help of “certain very important people, if they have wisdom and if they have courage, we are going to win this election.” The attendees chanted “four more years.”

Legal experts say this case is a non-starter. University of Texas Law Professor Steve Vladeck writes, “It is lacking in actual evidence; it is deeply cynical; it evinces stunning disrespect for both the role of the courts in our constitutional system and of the states in our elections; and it is doomed to fail.”

But the fact that Republican leaders have accepted, rather than condemned, this attempt to overturn a legitimate election says they are willing to destroy American democracy in order to stay in power. On CNN tonight, former Ohio Governor John Kasich, a Republican himself, called the lawmakers supporting Trump’s attack on democracy “morally and ethically bankrupt.”

Republicans might be stoking attacks on our electoral system because they know the courts will shut them down. After all, Trump’s lawyers are currently 1-51 in court, and it is unlikely the Supreme Court will take up Texas’s lawsuit. So siding with Trump is a cheap way for leaders to avoid alienating his voters when they will want those voters in 2022.

But they are playing a deeply cynical and wildly dangerous game. Yesterday, the official Twitter account of the Arizona Republican Party asked followers if they were willing to die to overturn the election, then posted a clip from the film “Rambo” in which the main character is threatening someone’s life, saying “This is what we do, who we are. Live for nothing, or die for something.”

Today, talk show host Rush Limbaugh told his listeners that they are, in fact, still a majority but they are plagued with “RINOs” who are selling them out. “I actually think that we’re trending toward secession,” he said. “I see more and more people asking what in the world do we have in common with the people who live in, say, New York? What is there that makes us believe that there is enough of us there to even have a chance at winning New York? Especially if you’re talking about votes….” (New York City has more people than 40 of the 50 states.) He went on: “There cannot be a peaceful coexistence of two completely different theories of life, theories of government, theories of how we manage our affairs. We can’t be in this dire a conflict without something giving somewhere along the way.”

The theme of civil war, and of America tearing itself apart, was one pushed hard by Russian operatives in 2018. On Twitter, “Civil War” trended today. An actual civil war is highly unlikely, but the unwillingness of leaders to stop this language is already leading to death threats against election officials. The longer they permit it to go on, the worse things will get.

Republicans are working to undermine the incoming Democratic administration in other ways, too. Last week, Attorney General William Barr announced that he appointed U.S. Attorney John Durham as special counsel in October to investigate the FBI agents who worked on the investigation into Russia’s interference in the 2016 election. While the law about special counsels says they must come from outside the government, Barr claims to have found a loophole in that rule. Durham can be fired only for specific reasons such as conflict of interest or misconduct. Senate Judiciary Chairman Lindsey Graham (R-SC) applauded the appointment and the continuation of the investigation.

Today Biden’s son Hunter told the media that he has just learned that he is under investigation by the Department of Justice for tax issues, although CNN suggested it is a much wider financial investigation than that, and that it began in 2018. The Justice Department is also investigating a company related to Joe Biden’s brother James. While the DOJ is supposed to be independent of the president, these investigations echo Trump’s own calls for such investigations. Immediately Representative Ken Buck (R-CO) called for a special counsel to investigate Hunter Biden, and tonight, Trump tweeted that “10% of voters would have changed their vote if they knew about Hunter Biden…. But I won anyway!”

House Minority Leader Kevin McCarthy (R-CA) told Fox News Channel personality Laura Ingraham today that Representative Eric Swalwell (D-CA) should be “removed from Congress” after an Axios report that a Chinese intelligence operative had worked to ingratiate herself with California lawmakers between 2011 and 2015. The operative targeted a number of politicians, including Swalwell, and she fundraised on his behalf, but there is no evidence she broke any laws. In 2015, FBI officers alerted Swalwell, who immediately cut all ties to her. He was never accused of any wrongdoing. The operative left the country unexpectedly during the FBI investigation.

Although the Axios story was about Chinese espionage, right-wing media is aflame with attacks on Swalwell in what seems an attempt to discredit a Democrat on the House Intelligence Committee. Don Jr. tweeted that Swalwell “was literally sleeping with a Chinese spy,” an allegation that is nowhere in the story, although the story mentions that two unidentified midwestern mayors had affairs with her.

The White House appears to be trying to sabotage the Biden administration not only by keeping the Biden team from information it needs, but by tying its hands and slowing it down. The day after the election, the Trump administration proposed a new rule requiring the new Department of Health and Human Services appointees to review most of the department’s regulations by 2023. The rule would automatically kill any regulations that haven’t been reviewed by then. This would mean that, just as the new administration is trying to fight the coronavirus, it would be slammed with administrative paperwork. The department’s chief of staff denies the unusual move is political, saying that a review is necessary because one hasn’t been done for 40 years.

Now that the transition process has finally started, Trump loyalists are blocking meetings, or sitting in on them to monitor what is being said, especially at the Environmental Protection Agency. At Voice of America, Trump’s appointed head, Michael Pack, has refused to give meetings or records to Biden’s team. For their part, Biden’s transition folks are avoiding fights in order to get whatever information they can.

Republican senators are also signaling that they intend to delay confirmations on Biden’s nominees, although in the past 95% of Cabinet nominees have had hearings before an inauguration, and 84% of those were approved within three days. Senator John Cornyn (R-TX), for example, questioned the experience of Biden’s nominee for Secretary of Health and Human Services, Xavier Becerra. Becerra is the Attorney General of California, and he sat on the House Committee on Ways and Means, which oversees health issues, during his 24 years in Congress. “I don’t know what his Health and Human Services credentials are,” Cornyn told The Hill. It’s not like [Trump’s HHS Secretary] Alex Azar, who worked for pharma and had a health care background.”

[mrs-dragneel-stark-solo]

Unforseen Chasm (Part 61)

Part 61 of Unforseen Chasm

Prompt: Two sisters fall for men that are absolute enemies. The love they have could tear all of them apart, or it could bring them together. Word Count: 1224 Warnings: Language, grief, self-hatred, self-loathing, lying, running away, sadness Note: This is by far the longest thing I’ve ever written (including my other fic series). first major Collab with my best friend @thorne93​​ what was first a simple “what if” moment turned into a two year writing session and I’ve never been more prouder of myself than when i started my first series. goes through most of the MCU plots there are some changes to accommodate for what we wanted and there is a bit of a crossover between the MCU and other characters. I hope you guys enjoy reading this just as much as I enjoyed writing it.

All of you returned back to the compound. A new wave of absolute devastation had settled over the lot of people. Before there was some iota of hope, something to grab onto. Perhaps you could kill Thanos, threaten him to give the stones up, use them to bring everyone back -- something, anything…

Now… now there was nothing. 

Shannon was still tending to a weak Tony. Bruce was tending to Shannon. Nat and Steve saw to each other. Rhodey and Nebula seemed to click. Carol and Thor became friends it seemed. She said she’d rest up for another couple of days before leaving. You wanted to get to know her further, she seemed great, but what would be the point? She would leave too. 

It was clear to you that you were neither wanted nor needed by anyone. You were just the fuck up that let Thanos go, there was no use for you to stay here. You’d only be in the way of everyone’s happiness. You knew your mourning wouldn’t let up any time soon, and being surrounded by this love… this camaraderie… something about it made the pain hurt all that worse.

Midnight was fast approaching. You thought it best to sweep out when no one was looking, as to not raise questions or suspicion. You could be seven hours away, long gone by the time anyone got up. 

You packed your things quickly. You didn’t have much at the compound, just a few outfits. Most of your things were actually back at your apartment.

Your apartment…

Dread seeped its way into your chest. Your apartment that held so many memories of Loki… Could you go there? Could you face that? 

You had to. You had no choice. You needed clothes. Pictures. Money. You had to swallow this pain if you were going to get past it. You shook the thoughts from your mind and focused, throwing your things into a duffel bag. You threw it over your shoulder to take it to the elevator so that you could just grab it all at once on the go. You also needed to borrow another bag from the storage closet. 

Unfortunately, on your way to the elevator, Shannon was headed your way. 

“Oh, hey, you going somewhere?” she asked, eyeing you up and down as you placed your bag on the floor.

“Oh, uh, just… you know gonna swing by the old apartment,” you stated casually. This wasn’t a lie. You were going back there. 

“Right. Yeah. So I’ll see you in the morning?” 

“Maybe a little later,” you said, trying to steer away from lying, or telling the truth. “What are you doing up so late? Aren’t you supposed to be watching Tony?” 

“Oh, he wanted some water and ice cream. So I’m kind of spoiling him. I can’t help it.” 

You smiled at her, reaching up to squeeze her shoulder. “You shouldn’t feel bad. You two deserve some time together. The last few weeks have been hell, for all of us. If you two can find some slice of happiness, then fucking grab it and don’t let go.” 

She returned your smile, nodding. “Thanks, Y/N/N. I appreciate that.”

“I’ll always support your happiness, Shan. Always.” 

“I know.” 

The two of you grinned once more before she headed behind you towards the kitchen and you went behind her back towards your room to finish packing. As soon as you knew the coast was clear, you grabbed your second bag, snuck out into the hall, picked up your second bag and fled to your apartment. From there, you tried to focus on your mission. You grabbed the clothes you could, picked out a few meaningful mementos and pictures, and finally, you stepped out of your apartment and locked it behind you. 

----------------------

The following morning, Shannon went into your room to say good morning and to check on you, but all she found was a note. On it, was simply scribbled, “Goodbye - Y/N.” Shannon’s hand flew to her mouth before tears invaded her vision. 

She had no idea what to do. She couldn’t leave Tony. 

“TADASHI, can you alert Steve to come to Tony’s room please?” she requested before bolting out of the room back to their bedroom. “Tony, Y/N... she’s gone.” 

“Gone? Like?” 

“Like all of her stuff is gone and she left a note that says ‘goodbye’ on it.” She thrust it at him. She tried calling your phone in a frenzy but it just went to voicemail. “TADASHI, where is her cell phone?” 

“Appears to be at her apartment, Miss Shannon.” 

The next second, Steve was in the room. “Shan? You called for me, doll?” 

“Can you go to Y/N’s apartment? I need to know if she’s there.” 

“Sure. Is everything alright?” he asked, appearing concerned.

“I don’t know. Please check. I can’t leave Tony.”

He nodded. “Yeah, of course. I’ll go and let you know what I find.” 

With that, he took off and Shannon paced relentlessly while Tony tried to calm her nerves. 

Steve got to your door, where he found an envelope, addressed to Shannon. Inside, was another simple note. It only said: I’m sorry, Shannon. I love you. Goodbye. Have a good life -- Y/N.” 

Steve called Shannon and sighed. “Hey, doll, I found something, but I don’t think you’re gonna like it.” 

“Tell me anyway,” she demanded. 

He told her about the note and what he found. He had knocked on the door several times, even listened, but nothing appeared to be moving from inside. 

“I’m sorry but I think she’s really gone.” 

“We have to find her,” she said with a panic, her eyes darting to Tony’s. 

“Hon, hang up the phone,” he gently ordered. 

“I’ll talk to you when you get back here, Steve.” She hung up and took a place next to Tony on the bed where he wrapped her in his arms. “What is it?” she wondered. 

“I love you, you know that? You’re my world. You’re my everything.”

“I know,” she said, a bit confused. 

“So trust me when I say this next thing. You need to leave Y/N/N alone.” 

“What? I can’t do--”

“Shh, shh, listen to me. She lost everything. She lost the love of her life. She needs some time alone. You know it as well as I do.” 

“But should she be alone? She needs to be surrounded by friends and family and--”

“I’m pretty sure Y/N/N knows what she needs right now. And I think you should trust me and her when she feels that leaving like this is what she needs. If you start tracking her and show up and try to drag her back, you’re going to get nothing but opposition.” 

Shannon was quiet. He was right, regrettably. 

“I know it hurts. I know you want to find her. But if she needs to deal with this alone, then hunting her down won’t do anyone any good.” 

Shannon nodded, trying to swallow tears. “You’re right.” 

“You’ll see. In a few weeks, she’ll be back to us.” 

“Yeah… I’m sure you’re right.” She leaned up and kissed her husband, putting faith and hope in him. If he had returned to her, and she had everyone else, you would return to. She had to have faith in that. 

Unforseen Chasm Tag list- @reigningqueenofwords​ @oldfreakything​ @adefectivedetective​ @dontbetooobvious​

Tag list-

@cas-you-assbutt-dean-needs-you​ @winchester-writes​ @winchesterenthusiast​ @deansdirtylittlesecretsblog​   @sammysbuttcheek​ @misz-adrii​ @sandlee44​ @womanxofletters​ @natsuccs​ @childishhoebinoo​ @expecteddifferent​ @girl-next-door-writes​ @fanaticfanfiction​ @dakotapaigelove​ @sassy-spn-knight-of-hell​ @reigningqueenofwords​ @oldfreakything​

Marvel: @reigningqueenofwords​ @flowerbunbunny​ @zelda2248​ @misz-adrii​

#unforeseen chasm #loki x reader #unforseen chasm #loki fic #Loki Laufeyson #tony stark fic #tony stark #tony stark x ofc #endgame #steve rogers

[plaid-shirtsandvibranium-arms]

There’s More Than One Way To Start An Apocalypse (14)

Summary: The Infinity War had happened and Thanos had won. 5 years later the Avengers try one last crazy idea to save everyone they lost, but a mysterious woman with a Supernatural background from Natasha’s past drops in unexpectedly derailing their plans. They soon find out that Thanos was now not the apocalypse they needed to stop.

Fandoms: Avengers, Supernatural

Pairings: Steve Rogers x Reader, Dean Winchester x Reader (previous), Natasha Romanoff x Reader (previous)

Warnings: Angst, The Damn Snap, mentions of depression and self-loathing, excessive and sometimes unnecessary violence, gore, mentions of death, copious amounts of blood, some profanity as per usual, mentions of past trauma, idiotic decision making, major character death/s, heartbreaking fluff, angst, angels being dicks

A/N: I’m late, but here’s an extra long chapter for you as we end our adventure with Sera. We have one more chapter after this and then we move to a new adventure with another one of Nat’s friends. Enjoy! Masterlist is pinned post, my lovelies. Feedback is encouraged in this house. :)

Masterlist

14: Divine Purpose

"Did you check the bathroom?" Dean asked as he rushed through the Bunker checking rooms in search of your face. Castiel abruptly stopped following Dean to pin him with a disbelieving look. "What? She likes to take a soak when she's stressed."

"Do you take me for an idiot, Dean?" Cas protested lowly, his hands on his hips opening his trench coat wide. "Of course I checked the lavatories. Yes, all of them. I felt her teleport out of here."

"Where the hell did she go?" Dean growled as he paced the war room.

"You don't think she went after Michael on her own, do you?" Sam was running a shaking hand through his face. He was just as fidgety as his brother, practically bouncing on his feet. He didn't want to think about what could possibly happen to you if you decided to turn this into another solo mission. He was still properly traumatized by the last time you did that. They all were.

"She was looking at the monitors a while ago, checking how many Michael has infected with his cooties," Tony said rapidly typing and pulling up any data that could help them. It wasn't necessarily easy to track someone who could teleport at will.

"If she pulls another kamikaze stunt I'm gonna kill her," Dean said furiously throwing his hands up. "Does she even know how to off Michael??"

"She does now," a new voice chimed in, low and heavily accented.

"Now you speak English??" Dean shouted at the prophet completely at wit's end. This really was not his day. He really needed to punch something soon.

"Of course I speak English, but why would I talk to an idiot like you?" he answered calmly, the monotone in his voice further aggravating Dean. The prophet continued cutting off the hunter's retort. "I have interpreted the tablet and came to speak to her seeing as she was the only one who had any chance of doing it."

"What do you mean?" Sam stepped closer his face scrunched in worry.

"There's only one other way of destroying an Archangel," he paused, the nerves getting to him again as he felt everyone's attention. "Like to like. Grace to grace. Sera must completely burn Michael's grace with her own."

"We have another problem, boys," Rowena gingerly stepped into the room, supporting a groggy looking Natasha under her arm. "I tried to stop her from doing it."

"Natasha!" Bruce said running to her side and taking her gently from the witch. The worried look on his face did not fade even as she gave him a small smile of reassurance as she leaned into the large green palm softly cupping her face. "What happened?"

Natasha swallowed hard and her expression shuffled to set in a frown. She understood why you did it. It was an extra weapon and right now you needed all your cards on the table, but hell if she liked it.

"She took the last of her soul," Nat said finally confirming every single fear they had. With the piece of your soul in Natasha back with you, this time if you die you die for real.

"Son of a bitch!"

## —— ## —– ##

Dean was going to kill you. He would yell at you until you go deaf then he would murder you with his bare hands. After that Natasha would have her turn. Then maybe Rowena or Sam. You went down the long list of potential suspects for your murder to calm your erratic heartbeat as you quietly snuck around the small office building Michael was using as his headquarters. The dead of night provided some cover, but you were careful to stick to the shadows just to be sure.

Your gut told you something was off when you were back at the Bunker. You had felt a sudden shift in the air that made your blood run cold in fear as if a new power was about to be unleashed. What you felt was so menacing and unimaginably evil that you just had to investigate or risk the whole team charging in severely unprepared.

What started out as a quick scouting mission turned into more when you saw and began to suspect what Michael was attempting to do. You knew it was a bad idea to go in alone, but you didn't have time to get back to the Bunker and plan a synchronized attack. By the time you all got to Michael again, he would have already succeeded and you didn't even want to think of the collateral damage.

Your more logical side was screaming at you as you followed behind Michael toward the back of the building to what seemed like a wide parking lot taking extra care to keep undetected. Your head pounded as you fought the instinct to flee with the dark twisted aura getting thicker as you closed the gap between you and Michael.

Your hand slowly reached to grasp for the hilt at the side of your hip, the texture of the obsidian metal ridged yet smooth on your skin. You crouched low behind a dumpster and peaked through the side to see the Archangel's back to you as he spread ashes on the cement and muttered something under his breath with his arm stretched out. The ground began to rumble as the cement on the ground began to split and crack with each uttered word. The air around you grew impossibly thick like tar and just as dark. You could practically taste it in your mouth making your stomach churn and urging you to vomit.

"Come out, Sera," you heard Michael say lowly, his voice mocking.

You grit your teeth and cursed at yourself. Your logical side was practically rioting, begging you to run. Instead you stepped around your hiding place in full view now of the angel who had turned around to face you with an amused smile. You steeled yourself with your grip on the blade tightening with each step you took.

"Don't tell me you honestly thought I didn't feel your presence the moment you arrived, did you? Power like that can't be masked. I have to thank you for that by the way. It will be useful when I drain you of it," he chuckled.

You bared your teeth as you snarled. The ground beneath your feet continued to rumble as the fissure widened. "Don't think I don't know what you're doing."

"Oh I was fully counting on you knowing," he said, the patronizing tone sickening you. "I knew you would feel the power and it would compel you to come to me. Saves me all that trouble of going after you myself."

A part of you already suspected that this was a trap before you even made the rash decision to come here. Michael hadn't been careless before and he wasn’t going to suddenly start now, but you couldn't resist and the bastard knew that. He had been banking on it. Even your lack of surprise at this revelation didn't stop the chill running down your spine. 

"Come now, silly girl, don't look at me like that. I read you perfectly well, didn't I?" 

He began to circle you now and you fought the intense urge to punch the grin off his face. The fissure continued to widen and now you could hear the blood-curdling screams of the creatures that awaited beneath.

"Poor Sera, desperate to prove she's worth more than what she was created to do that she would willingly jump at any opportunity to protect this disgusting race. To be seen as more than just a weapon and a threat," he laughed at you full of condescension. You grit your teeth to stop yourself from rising to his bait.

"The Shedim won't follow you," you growled. So base and demonic were these creatures that Chuck had locked them up in the farthest unreachable corners of Hell never to see the light of day. So uncontrollably evil was their nature that even Lucifer himself refused to even use them for his own agenda.

You saw his smile widen, the contrast of sharp stark white teeth against the chocolate skin of his current vessel making for a threatening visage.

"Who says I need them to follow me?"

You felt the quaking beneath your feet intensify almost throwing you off balance at the same time you saw his eyes burn bright blue. You pounced then pulling your blade from it's sheath and attacked Michael who easily blocked you with his own Archangel blade in a clash of divine power against sharp vibranium and silver.

Locked against his own weapon you saw him again mock you as he held your gaze. You pushed your blade against his to get just enough distance to pull your blade back and attack with several swings. A punch to the gut reinforced with grace threw you back, but you caught yourself into a flip and landed in a crouch. It was only a moment of distraction but you noticed that the gaping fissure had paused it's opening.

From your crouched position, you pressed your hand to the ground and channeled your grace to force the fissure to close. It took all of your concentration to will the gates of hell to seal itself. You screamed at the effort of this painful tug of war between you and Michael. His grace was so strong that the fissure barely budged, but that also meant that this was hard on him too and you could use that to your advantage.

He tutted at you. "We can't have that."

He whistled and the answering snarls from all around you made you momentarily release the grasp you had on the gate. All around you several creatures loomed closer; demons, werewolves, wraiths, and shapeshifters. All with a murderous hunger in their eyes targeted at you. You raised your weapon in defense as your eyes darted to each of your sides. You were surrounded, but you were dead set at keeping at least part of you dedicated to keeping that gate from opening fully. You weren't about to let Michael win.

A piercing roar from one of the bigger werewolves disturbed the tension and just like a battle cry the horde of monsters converged on you. You blasted one side with your grace driving a considerable number of them crashing to the surrounding structures, quickly following by charging at the rest with your blade in front of you.

You fought like a mad woman at that point. You swung and slashed your blade clean through the neck of the werewolf who had howled before jumping on his shoulder to propel you toward another who was snapping his sharp teeth at you. You dodged to the side to avoid his claws as you kicked back another. You hooked the curve of your blade behind you at it's neck and pulled down hard taking his head with you.

You were fighting on auto pilot now using every ounce of skill you had learned through the years with each calculated hack and blast of your power. You lifted anything that was near you; crates, planks, and large rocks to crash against your opponents. You used your body to punch, kick, and disable with every trick you knew that would make Natasha proud. The sweat on your brow began to bead with the effort as you lost count of how many you had fought, but they just kept on coming. Your limbs began to grow heavy and your clothes sticky with their blood. Your mind began to waver with the difficulty of focusing your grace on the gates.

The fatigue was getting to you as you miscalculated an attack earning you a hard punch in the face and a knife in your thigh. Another kick flung you back hitting the back of your head against a metal grate. You forced yourself with difficulty to quickly get back on your feet knowing that they would not stop charging at you. You felt the blood drip from your nose and mouth making you spit on the ground. Your whole face stung and ached. You groaned as you pulled out the knife staining your pants a deeper red, your own blood mixing with theirs. Through the haze of your concussion you saw Michael raise his hand causing the mob to stop. It didn't look like you made much of a dent in their numbers. You leaned against the wall trying to regain your sense of balance, the sword gifted to you temporarily serving as a crutch.

"Give it up and join me instead, Sera. Be my weapon. You and I have a higher purpose, to cleanse this world and all the others. What do you say?"

You swayed on your feet but you willed yourself to raise your blade in front of you. You carefully directed your grace to heal your injuries just enough to stabilize yourself. You were about to tell him to go to hell when a different type of ringing in your ears stilled you. A renewed energy coursed through you as you recognized it.

Michael glared at you but you saw the spark of confusion in his eyes as he saw your busted lip curl in a devilish smile.

"What do I say?" you laughed darkly. "Hulk, smash."

A loud roar from above echoed through the sleepy town as The Hulk in all his raging glory crashed down in the middle of the battle field making the enemy take a step back. He turned his large head toward you to give you a terrifying grin which you returned gratefully. You saw Natasha jump from his arms into a graceful roll landing in front of you with her batons out and ready.

"Took you long enough," you muttered.

"You didn't exactly leave breadcrumbs for us to follow, peaches," Tony said as he descended.

"Yeah I did," you coughed causing a wave of pain through you. That kick was stronger than you thought, appearing to have bruised your ribs.

"You mean the beacon of grace usage that almost fried my whole system?" You could almost see the smirk on his face behind his mask. "Nice touch."

One by one the rest of the team filtered in coming to stand beside or in front of you in full battle gear with weapons at the ready trained at Michael and his army. 

"What's the run down, Y/N?" you heard Sam ask.

"Army of creatures and an angel with a daddy complex trying to open the gates of hell to release something that will destroy the world," you said casually with a shrug.

"So the usual?" Dean chuckled as he cocked his gun.

"Bravo, Sera," Michael said from across the way. "But I wouldn't be so confident if I were you."

Running. You could hear it clearly. The loud quick stomps of feet as they gradually drew closer to where you were thundered in your ears. That was a lot of feet. You realized at that moment that there was something else that felt off to you about the town. It was too quiet. Far too quiet.

Michael had turned every single resident in the vicinity into a creature for his army. The knowledge made you sick to your stomach almost making you double over. These were innocent people ripped from their lives to serve his twisted agenda. You watched as the crowd around him grew exponentially far outnumbering your team. You hurriedly felt for their souls hoping against hope that they were still intact. You could still save them. You had to save them.

Your eyes met Castiel's as he shook his head sadly. They were gone. You couldn't detect a single human soul anymore. These were merely vessels now for Michael's purpose. Your face turned dark as the anger raged through you. You decided you were going to relish killing him.

"Give it up, Sera" Michael laughed. "You can't save anyone. You can't save this world."

You saw Steve in his full Captain stance step forward with his chin stubbornly raised and his shield steadily in front of him. He looked every bit the seasoned leader he was.

"Not on her own, she can't," he said loud enough for everyone to hear. He turned to you for a second locking his deep blue eyes with yours to give you a reassuring nod. You had him. You had all of them. And they sure as hell had you.

You gripped your blade firmly and took every emotion you felt to fuel you one more time; anger, desperation, determination, pride, gratitude. Your blade started to glow bright white starting from the hilt travelling up to the tip of the curve. Blue wisps danced around it menacingly.

Shuri had added a special feature to this blade that only you could access. It could harness and hold your grace for you to wield freely as a unique weapon and with Chuck's grace charging it, it was far more powerful than any Archangel blade. Perhaps powerful enough to take down the first Archangel himself. Michael staggered back and scowled as he saw your eyes blaze with your grace and your injuries close as they healed.

"Avengers!" Steve called out to them giving a meaningful look at Team Free Will silently saying that that included them all now too. You shared the same proud look as the Winchesters, Cas, Jack, and Rowena as you preened at Steve's inclusion. The smirk on his face was deadly as he stared down the horde. "Assemble."

You were deafened by the eruption of roars, each side consumed by the singular purpose of crushing the other. You could pick out Hulk's voice above the rest as well as the disturbing screech coming from the fissure. This prompted you to contribute your own cry as you joined your team in charging at Michael's army. The Hulk smashed his fists into the ground as he ran to meet the enemy with the rest of you lined closely behind.

The moment each side clashed was pure chaos. It was an explosion of metal on metal, flesh on flesh, and blood in copious amounts. Each one of you focused on attacking every single creature within reach. One long swipe of your blade sliced through a number of creatures like a hot knife through butter. You turned to push back a few who were threatening to overrun Bucky and Natasha.

You jumped to the side as the Captain's shield whizzed passed you taking out several heads before it circled back to his hand. He shouted through the battle as he smashed his shield against a few more attempting to swipe at him. "Jack and Rowena will take care of the gates. We'll keep them busy. You go after Michael."

"Clear a path for peaches would you, Wanda," Tony requested sweetly as he tore the head off one werewolf while blasting through plenty more in rapid succession.

“With pleasure,“ Wanda said her hands already gathering her energy before blasting in straight. It parted the throng clear in the middle leaving a burning path of carnage directly toward Michael.

You heard the Hulk growl. He proceeded to swing his arms in wide arcs throwing clusters of them aside serving as your tank and shield. You sprinted behind him without hesitation driving your flaming blade through anyone who dared come in your way. You could see Michael up ahead confidently surveying the destruction he was causing.

You were close now, nearly in front of your goal. You saw him smirk as he gestured with his hand and his army answered by closing ranks in front of him effectively shielding him. You glared at him as you absentmindedly slashed through a couple more that pounced on you. They fell to the ground in a dead heap.

You needed to get to Michael. You needed to end this battle before Michael can get a chance to overrun your team. Jack and Rowena can't hold the gates forever.

"Hulk, throw tiny angel."

"Excuse me what now??" you screamed at the green giant.

Instead of answering you, he circled his hand around your torso lifting you off the ground effortlessly with an indignant shriek escaping your mouth. He stretched his arm back behind him before unceremoniously pitching you across and above the fight like a baseball.

"I’m getting you back for this, Hulk!" you screamed and you could have sworn that you heard him laugh as you flew through the air landing in a flurry of gravel a few feet in front of Michael.

You slowly drew to stand straight on your feet, your eyes never wavering from the Archangel's who stared at you with cocky disdain. You held your blade at your side as you advanced, the red blood dripping from it contrasting starkly with the light of it's aura. You noted the struggle on his face as he raised his own blade to you, holding the gate open was taking a bigger toll on him than he had expected. He shouldn't have given so much of his grace away to his followers.

You smirked. "You're weak, Michael. This ends now."

You dug one foot on the ground and sprung yourself forward toward Michael, your sword stretched in front of you and your eyes set coldly on your target. Your blades clashed sparking divine power flying everywhere neither one willing to break. You quickly twirled only to land your blade again against his. You felt the surge of his power blast and separate you.

"You think me weak?" he scoffed. "You're so desperate to be called human! Stupid girl, so badly wanting to be loved."

"Shut up," you murmured, your jaw ticking as he hit a nerve. You slowly advanced toward him again your blade vibrating in your hand as your growing rage increased the power it contained.

"Wanting to be chosen for once," he smirked maliciously at you growing arrogant in successfully pushing your buttons. "Pathetic!"

You squeezed your eyes shut trying to control yourself. "I won't let you destroy another world, you son of a bitch."

You charged at him again with renewed vigor. Your swipes coming now in quick bursts one after another. You attacked him relentlessly with the force that you came down on not waning one bit. You hated to admit that what he said cut you deep, but you weren't about to let that loosen your resolve.

"You think God wants you to save this corrupted world? Humans are not worth saving, Sera. That's why he abandoned this failed creation," the swipe of his blade caught you on your shoulder making you stumble back. The wound burned hot on your skin as you clutched at it. "He left the Archangels in his stead to govern over this unsavory race. To make it as he originally intended."

He succeeded in cutting you a few more times and winding you with calculated blows of his grace. He was enraged and you felt like it was more than just directed at you. His attacks felt like more the frustration of an abandoned child looking to redeem himself. Grasping at a purpose to again be a favored child. You took it. You took every anger fueled strike he had.

"He abandoned all of his creation! All of us, Sera," he growled angrily, punctuating his words with a sharp uppercut that made your teeth rattle.

"And now you think if you cleanse the worlds, daddy is going to come back and pat you on the head for being a good boy," you snorted. Typical angel bullshit. Your blood boiled at the thought of all the lives that were lost and will be lost in his insane crusade.

"Join me, Sera," he appealed once more. "Accept your divine purpose. You're an angel. My mission is yours."

It was his turn to charge at you again feeling arrogant all of a sudden. You blocked his blade with your own and pushed him back. You exchanged several hard blows, your arms straining against the effort. You channeled more grace to match his strength, but he was aggressive in his attacks. The purpose he believed he served making him push harder.

You heard a mighty roar from the battle that ensued around you. You took stock as far as you could see. The Hulk was barreling through groups of demons, tearing them limb from limb with his bare hands. Natasha was close to him caught in a deadly dance of swinging batons and electricity. Bucky was emptying his magazines back to back with Steve who was flinging his shield smoothly through each possessed neck while Sam provided them air support. The Winchesters were backed up by Castiel as they poured out every hunting knowledge they had on each attacker smoothly transitioning between weapons. Tony and Wanda were in a wild rampage of pure energy destruction. Jack's eyes were fully blazing golden as he concentrated on using his grace to keep the gates closed. Rowena stood near him muttering incantations to protect them them both.

Each one of them tired, bruised, wounded, and dirtied, but their will to fight was evident in the set of their jaws, the fire in their eyes, and the strength of their attacks.

You saw each of their faces reveal their heart and commitment to this world; to this world Michael called a failed project, a disgrace, it's inhabitants beneath him. Your heart swelled at their fire to protect something someone else thought unworthy. You snapped your gaze back to Michael, your eyes intensifying as you released the hold you retained on your grace. Your eyes were practically blinding him from this close making him step back. The glow and flames on your sword grew unbelievably large.

"You can shove your purpose up your ass, Michael," you growled.

You gave a guttural yell as you swung your sword toward him catching his chest leaving a long gash. He clutched at it in obvious pain. His own grace seeping from the wound. He stumbled further back but you followed closely with another harsh blow. He fell to the floor and he scrambled back staring wide eyed at your murderous image. He felt you open another wound from his thigh up to his stomach. The energy in him drained rapidly with each cut you made. The look in his eyes quickly turned to fear as you continued your onslaught.

"And you're mistaken," you said lowly as you loomed directly above him, your blade raised high above your head. "I'm only half angel."

You shouted one more time as you charged all your grace through the blade you brought down squarely through the center of Michael's chest. He gave out a loud pained yell as his grace exploded out from his mouth up to the heavens in a long beacon. You forced more of your grace through to burn Michael, stubbornly ignoring the way it ripped at you painfully from the inside. You yelled, your throat going dry and coarse, as you dug your blade deeper into his chest.

After what felt like an eternity to you, the light around you died out and Michael lay a wasted vessel beneath you. The absolute fatigue hit you like a solid wall as your legs gave out and you dropped to your knees. The world around you grew muddled in your vision that spun out of control.

As you fell to the ground, instead of hard concrete you were caught by smooth Kevlar encasing taut muscle. Through half open eyes you saw worried blue ones staring back at you.

"It's all over now. I got you," Steve said softly as he caressed your face with comforting calloused hands.

You gave a weak smile. The last thing you remembered was a gentle kiss to your temple. With a much lighter heart than you remembered ever having, you gave in to the embrace of darkness.

Masterlist

#avengers x supernatural #avengers #dean winchester x reader #avengers fanfiction #avengers fic #supernatural #supernatural fanfiction #steve x reader #supernatural fic #there's more than one way to start an apocalypse #captain america x reader #captain america fic #captain america #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers fic #steve rogers #dean x reader #dean winchester #sam wilson #Sam Winchester #castiel #Jack Kline #natasha romanoff #bruce banner #tony stark #wanda maximoff #Bucky Barnes #nephilim!reader #nephilim reader #angel!reader

[anika-ann]

Errare Humanum Est - Pt.3

What’s in a Name?

Type: series, soulmate AU series  (part 1, part 2)   x Supernatural

Pairing: Steve Rogers x reader (past?)    Word count: 1850

Summary: When angel grace fails to deal with an amnesiac, the human ways will have to do. Too bad they are rather slow.

Warnings: swearing, amnesia, Team Free Will being themselves, alcohol

The briefest guide to SPN characters of Team Free Will (at the end of the post)

Story masterlist

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An ominous silence fell on the room, until an annoyed voice cut the air.

“Awesome. Is it like… a black nothing? White nothing? Or…?”

Castiel grimaced at Dean’s wry questions.

“It’s… it’s like a really tight knot, to be honest. The memories, I can feel them there, but… there’s nothing I can do about it. I’m sorry. I couldn’t even get a glimpse. I’m sorry, Natasha. I wish I could be more help.”

Tears gathered in Natasha’s eyes, but she cautiously rose to her feet as if she didn’t trust her strength and took Castiel’s hands in hers.

“It’s alright, Castiel. Thank you for trying,” she whispered weakly, her smile forced. She turned to the brothers then, tugging at the shirt she was wearing. “I… can I keep those, please?”

“Yeaaah?” Sam answered unsurely, not following where she was going with that. “Why would you ask that?”

“I… I think I should go. Thank you-“

That had them all lunging forward, Sam speaking up first.

“Whoa! We’ve been over this. You… we can’t exactly keep you here by force, but you have nowhere to go. No money to live on. Your memory… is not okay. Castiel couldn’t find anything at the moment, but we’ll figure out a way to help you.”

“I don’t want to-to impose. I’ve- I have already-“ she stuttered, but was interrupted by Dean’s sigh.

“Look. I’m not gonna lie, I ain’t happy about babysitting you,” he announced honestly, rising from his seat, gesturing towards her with his beer as he spoke. Sam really hoped he was going somewhere with that talk, because so far, it sounded like he wanted to support Natasha’s decision to leave. “But we had much bigger problems at our hands and much more annoying too. Helping people is kinda what we do. It’s in the family.”

Her eyes were wide as she was watching the hunters and their angel, attentive and observant. She was clearly considering her options, wondering if Dean was being honest. Sam was pleasantly surprised by Dean’s speech to say at least.

She gulped before speaking up, her gaze falling on the floor. “…okay. Thank you. I’ll… I promise to repay you when I can.”

“I’m sure you will,” Sam hurried before Dean could tell something that would creep her out – like ‘having a few ideas about that’. Though Sam was most impressed by Dean’s earlier words.

“Can I just ask you something, Dean?” she quirked up then, the corners of her lips inconspicuously rising.

“Yeah?”

“…do angels count as your family?”

“You-“ the older brother started, only to shut up and realize he didn’t know how to finish. So he only pointed a finger at her in pretended warning.

Sam snorted a laugh. “I think we’ll get along just fine.”

“If you must know, for us, family don’t end with blood,” Dean finally managed to reply and Sam couldn’t help but smile sadly at the memory of Bobby, a man who was an uncle to them, if not a father too. “It’s about the family you choose.”

An honest smile lighted up Natasha’s face, her eyes soft. “That’s nice…. So, where do we start?”

“Well, I should go,” Castiel announced swiftly, casting a glance at Dean, ever dutiful to the righteous man. “I’ll… see if I can find anything on the subject of soulmates I don’t already know.”

“Okay. See ya, Cas.”

“Bye,” Sam hummed absently, his mind already racing, wondering about their next steps.

With a sound of a flutter of wings, the angel was gone. Natasha stared blankly where he had been standing just a second ago.

“…oh,” she huffed, clearly caught off guard. “I didn’t see that coming. I didn’t even say goodbye.”

Sam only laughed at that – she seemed confused, sure, taken aback, definitely, but she was processing everything remarkably well considering what a mess she had woken up into.

“You’ll get used to it. We’re really tired, so we would catch few hours. I was thinking I could lend you my tablet?” the younger hunter offered, pulling it out of his bag and holding it out to her. She eyed it curiously and Sam realized where the problem might be. “I’ll show you how to operate it-“

“I… think I might know, actually,” Natasha admitted sheepishly, biting her lip as if ashamed. Sam couldn’t help the rise of his eyebrows.

“That you remember? You don’t know your name, but you know how to work with this thing?” Dean questioned, his eyebrows high as well. She only shrugged helplessly. Dean spun to Sam then, his face saying just how done he was with this situation. “Brains are weird, man.”

“More so when angels and resurrections are involved,” Sam added, grimacing wryly. Oh, he would know, wouldn’t he? They all would.

“Not wrong there.”

Sam turned his attention back to the woman then, seeing she already turned it on, the screen lit up. Huh. Okay then.

“I just thought you might wanna… look up things. Anything that comes to your mind.”

“Like unhuman things?” she asked half-bitter, half-curious.

“Oh, you don’t wanna look for those. You might find Twilight and Teen Wolf and stuff like that. Not to be trusted.”

Natasha tilted her head to side, not understanding what Dean was referring to, naturally, and Sam rolled his eyes. She reminded him of Castiel for a moment and a new idea struck his mind.

“Natasha, can I take a picture? I’ll run facial recognition… just to see if anyone reported you missing, okay?”

She hesitated, shifting her weight from one foot to the other, but nodded. “…Okay. Thank you, Sam.”

Sam led her to a wall, switching on more lights for better illumination of her face. He snapped a quick photo of her face and started the trace. Dean had managed to tuck himself in already.

“That was… fast. I promise to be quiet.”

“Thanks. Goodnight, Natasha. If you’re tired, just wake up one of us and we’ll leave you a bed, okay?” Sam offered, internally cringing at the idea of trying to fit onto the tiny-ass sofa.

Natasha glanced at the piece of furniture, then back at Sam and at Dean, her eyebrow slowly rising, probably thinking the same thing.

“Sure. Goodnight, Sam. Goodnight, Dean.”

The only reply she got was Dean’s snort. She giggled and Sam rolled his eyes, laying down to his bed, finding a comfortable position – as comfortable as one could find on a motel room bed. He was out in no time.

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Trying to research resurrections would have probably been a good idea. Or ‘how to cure amnesia’ or something like that. But no. Not for you.

The very first thing you wrote down – and really, could anyone blame you since Sam had specifically told you to look up whatever came to your mind – was the word ‘soulmate’.

It led you straight to a world of wonder. There was everything; it started with a definition, mostly matching what Sam, Dean and Castiel had told you.

Then the photos of soulmarks appeared. Some were funny and specific, like ‘Excuse me, but I believe that the dog that just ate my snack was yours,’ or ‘I’m afraid I’m in the wrong class, ‘cause I sure didn’t sign up for Greek mythology’. Others were annoying and general, something between the lines of ‘Can I borrow your pen?’ or ‘Is this seat taken?’. There were few that broke your heart: ‘Please, don’t leave,’ ‘I just got you, you can’t do this to me.’

You weren’t sure in which category your words would fall into; probably very specific and weird for both the crossed ones and the plain ones.

People were looking for their soulmates too. Either via forums, attempting to guess what comeback they would throw when hearing the words on their skin; another option was a few agencies that claimed to be able to find the match; that felt a bit like cheating and you doubted it worked anyway.

What took your breath away and made your heart ache were links to counselling for those who lost their soulmate. It made your chest tight for a very obvious reason, yet so irrational. You might have lost your soulmate, but you didn’t remember it; on the other hand, your other half could be suffering indescribable pain for their loved one, the one they had been destined to spent their life with. For that only, you felt tears gather in your eyes.

Then again, you could have been wrong. As far as you were concerned, you had never had to meet in the first place, and they only had their words crossed out just like yours, left with a dull ache and strange sense of longing.

There were brighter sides to soulmates too – many and many people shared their meet-cute with their destined partner, photos radiating love and adoration, with the subtlest shade of hate in the comments from people who no doubt didn’t have a soulmate to begin with. Because apparently, that was a thing as well; not everyone was bound to have a soulmate, not in the literal sense of the word. The world was a truly strange place.

You didn’t even realize you had started to rub your collarbone, your mind escaping elsewhere. What was your soulmate like? You believed with your whole heart he was one and the same person, saying both of the lines written on you.

Was he sweet? Polite? Or a bad boy? Tall or shorter than you, scrawny or built like a mountain? What colour were his eyes, his hair? Did he have a nice smile, warm and welcoming, or was a grumpy man? An extrovert, an introvert? Was he willing to show affection publicly or was he shy and private? What did he enjoy doing?

What was he doing now? And more importantly… where was he?

You sighed, sinking deeper into the couch. You could wonder, but it would be no help. You needed to pull yourself together, look up things that might be actually useful to you as a human being with amnesia and deal with daydreaming later.

You wanted to remember. You wanted to know your soulmate, but you needed to know your own persona first.

Hell, you didn’t even know your name.

For some reason you had chosen Natasha, but the motivation behind your actions slipped through your fingers, the truth burning on your tongue, leaving a bitter aftertaste as you couldn’t grasp it.

Alright. For now, you would be Natasha. You trusted your instinct on that one, choosing the name despite feeling it wasn’t your own, but still with a purpose.

Figuring out your last name was the next logical step. You couldn’t recall it either, so you just wrote down ‘American last names’ to the browser, waiting for results to pop up. You surfed through them for a minute, your fingers freezing on one particular name.

The name struck something in you, a spark lighting up like a flare in your chest and you knew this was the one you should pick.

You had been brought back from death. And until your true self and your mind would be resurrected, a new person had to be born.

That person happened to be Natasha Rogers.

“Natasha Rogers…” you whispered, barely audible and a smile spread on your lips involuntarily. You liked the sound of that. “That will do.”

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Part 4

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Thank you for reading :-*

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[cheersrogrs]

ENDGAME SPOILERS

i don't normally do this but i just had to get this off my chest. this is for  everyone that that is hating on endgame and specifically Cap’s ending. full disclaimer: i am not a comic reader (more of a wiki reader tbh) but i am a devoted Cap fan (esp MCU’S cap) and i have been for a very long time; i am also a hardcore bucky barnes fan, and a stucky fan. 

first off lets establish the technical aspect of the time travel - to me, OG Cap went back, successfully returning all the infinity stones to their original places. this corrects all the “divergent timelines”. however, when he chose to stay with peggy, OG CAP = OLD CAP and cap who is still frozen in the 1970s remains frozen until 2012, who then goes to do all the heroic stuff that he did. OG/OLD Cap then returns back to the main MCU timeline where his gives Sam the shield. 

i repeat, I as a steve, bucky and a stucky fan, am so pleased with his ending. because 1) he chose this for himself, 2) he just wanted to see what he would have had if he did not throw his life away for his country, 3) just because of that look on his face, dancing with peggy, sold this send off to me. 

it may not have happened on screen, but i am positive that steve and bucky discussed about this. evidence was that bucky was telling him that he would miss him eventho, to the rest, steve was supposed to be gone for just 5 seconds. and he wasn't even shock when steve wasn't on the platform. 

and bucky; who LOVES steve, do you think that bucky would honestly deny steve that one chance of happiness that he craved for all his life? 

NO. because he knows how much steve has given up. he knows how isolated and alone steve feels. he knows the biggest regret steve has (that he can amend) is to go back to the past and have that dance with peggy. yes i know that he created a new family for himself here (but him going back doesn't not erase this. he doesn’t mysteriously loses his memories and he also doesn't mysteriously disappears from everyone else’s memory so he gets the best of both worlds) and i am sure bucky would be so selfless to say “no, dont save me”. because he, at this current point of time, is already saved. its in the past. technically steve can’t change present bucky’s condition BECAUSE IT WOULD HAVE ALREADY HAPPENED. if he did change things with hydra and saved bucky, that would have created another timeline. our OG bucky doesn’t get a do-over. but he has a chance now to start a new life, with his new friends (sam, wanda, the rest of the avengers). he is finally stable. 

what is he going to do, if he went back with steve? in a MCU point of view: basically nothing?? because again, if he went back to stop hydra -  that would only stop the torture of THAT bucky, not OUR bucky. in a stucky point of view: watch the man he loves, love someone else??

steve and bucky dépend on each other. they are each other’s life line and family. yes. but i don’t want to see them be co-dependent. i see “till the end of the line” as not to be a promise of till death do us apart; it means that i will be there for you whenever you need me to be. steve saved bucky; steve WAS there for bucky when he needed him to be. Bucky gave steve love when no one else loved him, gave him support, gave him the motivation to fight for what was right. to anyone that says that steve broke this promise, please rethink this. bucky would have wanted steve to be happy and for that to happen, steve needed to at least try. bucky, considering the state that he was in BP, IW, EG, seemed to be recovering. let him recover on his own terms. let him be strong again as BUCKY BARNES. Let him create a new life for himself; one that he chose for himself. not the life his country gave him, not the life that his torturers gave him, and not the life that he needed to have so as to not worry steve. they both needed to move on by themselves. 

and the other thing was “peggy’s whole life was erased” IF my time travel theory was true, then that would not have been the case. but if we take away all the complications with the time travel, why would steve going back destroy peggy’s character development? im sure if peggy was as strong as we all know she is, she wouldn't let a man stop her from doing what she loves. she would still be a strong woman. she would still be a founder of shield. the fact that some of you think she would stop her life for steve is completely ironic. she didnt become a founder of shield and the badass woman she was just cause she lost steve. she did it because she could, with or without steve. she has done it without steve once, and now she gets to do it with steve by her side. 

and i see arguments that oh steve only knew peggy for months, what was so significant about their relationship that he threw his whole life away or abandoned all his friends?. it wasn't that she was the love of his life. but she was the definition of the “what ifs” in his life. the man just wanted to try. he already lead his life as skinny, defenseless steve, he has already lead a long and tiring life of cap - the first avenger or the fugitive. now he just wants to see if steve rogers - husband, father, human was possible. and i can guarantee that if peggy or steve did not feel the same away as they did during the war, neither one would have forced the relationship. but they did. DID YOU NOT SEE THEIR FACES DURING THEIR DANCE???? AND THAT KISS? THAT WAS PURE LOVE. 

if you knew and understood (MCU) bucky, you would know that bucky would have been so proud of steve. And i am so proud of him. 

if steve have stayed, yes we would all get more bucky-steve moments, they would be together (almost) forever, but steve would never have stayed down if he did, and guess what, bucky would have followed him. and i personally think that is the last thing that bucky wants. 

i personally believed that bucky was his soulmate in life. but that doesn't mean that steve loved bucky the way we want him to (at least in the mcu). to have someone that you call home, does not necessarily mean that that person is the one that you want to love romantically, marry and spend your whole lives together. but peggy. peggy is steve’s light. peggy is his heart. again, this does not cancel his love for bucky. it’s just different. a lot of people say that the reason why steve is the way he is today (his decisions, his plots in the movies) is because of bucky. i 100% agree but i think a lot of people forget that peggy was also an important person in his life. in CA: TFA, it was bucky that made him step up as cap america, but peggy was also there cheering him on and never losing faith in him. she was also the 2nd person (that we know of) to see steve as he really is even when he was little steve. in CA: CW: it was peggy’s words (through sharon’s speech) that made him take his stand. so to say that bucky was the only sole driver of steve’s actions would be completely false. they both loved him so much. 

also, on anyone shitting on steve’s decision on falcon-cap. screw you. yes, falcon isn't a super soldier, doesn't have extra powers and super strength, but he is a good man. he is kind, he is helpful and he is loyal. and that is what makes captain america, captain america. funny how some of you have the quote “not a perfect soldier, but a good man” tattooed across your hearts and brains but somehow it doesn't apply when bucky isn't the one carrying the mantle. and bucky would have hated carrying the shield. fight me. 

bucky looked so happy knowing that steve lived his life. now he has the chance of living his own life, without worrying about steve. shouldn't that make you happy, as a fan? 

so, no i dont think the ending that we got, erased all of steve’s character development. this was all heart, pure cap. he knows that all is good in his world. he knows that the people he loves are okay and will be okay. he is no longer needed. it was time for him to pass the torch to someone else. it is now his time to rest.  

I’m sorry if i dont make sense, this is all over the place. i dont write my feelings out very well. i am sure that i have a millions more things to say but alas. 

when all is said and done, thank you chris evans for being the best cap that i could ask for. 

#endgame spoiler #captain america #steve rogers #bucky barnes #stucky #avengers endgame #steggy #peggy carter

[beatlejuice64]

Destiel: Season 9 - A catalog of Supernatural episodes

A catalog of each episode in Supernatural that features scenes related to Destiel. This includes scenes between Dean and Castiel, scenes with other characters that address their relationship with each other, and scenes that allude to Dean’s bisexuality.

Season 9 Summary Analysis

Cas struggles with being human, so when Dean and Sam find him, Cas is relieved to have a place to call home. Gadreel (posing as Ezekiel) threatens Sam’s safety if Dean does not get rid of Cas, so Dean tell Cas to leave. Cas is very upset by this and tries to move on, but when Dean eventually confides the whole situation to him, Cas forgives Dean almost immediately. Cas organizes an angel rebellion after he regains his powers, but he gives it all up to save Dean’s life. After Gadreel kills Kevin, Dean spirals into self-loathing and distances himself from both Cas and Sam. The Mark of Cain sparks a streak of self-destruction for Dean.

My interpretation: Dean telling Cas to go hurts Cas deeply, partly because he takes it as a personal rejection. Cas feels the weight of all of his recent mistakes, and the added rejection from the man he loves triggers a state of depression. When Dean shows up later asking for Castiel’s help, Cas acts resentful (Misha Collins mentioned in an interview that showrunner Jeremy Carver gave him a note to act like a jilted lover. Source: https://www.huffpost.com/entry/supernatural-premiere-season-9-misha-collins_n_4066250). Cas struggles to figure out how to continue living without Dean, and when Dean finally tells him what’s been going on, he’s relieved to find out that Dean did not want him gone. With a renewed sense of self, Cas digs himself out of depression as he helps the other fallen angels, and the rebellion gives him a solid sense of atonement for his betrayal of heaven. Even after all of Castiel’s efforts to repair his broken relationship to heaven, he still ends up choosing Dean over heaven yet again, despite the strain that has arisen between him and Dean. Nothing is more important to Cas than Dean’s safety, not even the respect of his fellow angels and the power of an army behind him. Dean pushes Cas away with his preoccupation to save Sam, and the Mark of Cain exacerbates Dean’s emotional distance from Cas as it shortens his temper and makes him more violent. Castiel’s new celebrity status among the angels makes Dean feel uncomfortable because he’s used to having somewhat of a monopoly on Castiel’s attention.

9.01 I Think I’m Gonna Like it Here

While Sam is in the hospital, Dean prays to Cas, setting aside his anger and expressing his need for emotional support: “Cas, are you there? Sammy’s hurt. He’s hurt pretty bad, and, um, I know you think that I’m pissed at you, k? But I don’t care that the angels fell, so whatever you did or didn’t do, it doesn’t matter, k? We’ll work it out. Please, man, I need you here.”

When Cas calls Dean, the first thing he does is explain that he did not mean to cause the angels to fall and that he was tricked by Metatron. Dean brushes it aside and fills Cas in on what’s going on. Cas shows genuine concern for Sam, saying he’s on his way to help. Dean, worried for Castiel’s safety, tries to convince Cas to protect himself instead of saving everyone else: “Have you heard my prayers? I’ve been praying to you all night.” “Dean, Metatron, he took my grace.” “What?!” “Don’t worry about me. What are you doing for Sam?” “Everything I can. There’s actually another angel in there working on him right now.” “What other angel?” “His name is Ezekiel. He’s cool. I mean, I think he is.” “Ezekiel, yes. He’s a good soldier. He should be able to help until I get there.” “Wait, no, no, no, no. Hey, that’s not an option.” “It might be a few days, but...” “Hey, Cas, listen to me. There are angels out there, okay? And they’re looking for you, and they’re pissed.” “Not all of them, Dean. Some are just looking for direction. Some are just lost.” “What’re you talkin’ about?” “I met one. I think I can help her, Dean.” “No, Cas. I know you wanna help, okay? I do. But helping angels is what got you in trouble in the first place. Now, I’m beggin’ you, for once, look out for yourself. Until we figure out what the hell is goin’ on, trust nobody.” “And do what? Just abandon them all?” “Damnit, Cas. You hearin’ yourself? There’s a war on, and it’s on you. There’s thousand of ‘em out there... you said you lost your grace, right? That means you’re human. That means you bleed and you eat and you sleep, and all the things you never had to worry about before.” “I’m fine, Dean.” “Look, get your ass to the bunker alone. You hear me? Go, Cas!”

Cas chooses to help Dean over helping the angel Hael.

9.03 I’m No Angel

Dean is worried about Castiel’s safety, especially after learning that other angels are after him: “...the more of them that are after Cas, the worse it is, so we gotta find him.”

Cas is struggling with being human and gets injured during an angel attack. A woman named April takes him in and shows him kindness. He opens up to her emotionally, and they end up sleeping together, but she turns out to be an angel manipulating him for information. Dean and Sam arrive just in time to see her kill him. After Dean kills her, he runs over to Cas and yells for him in anguish, grabbing his face. After Gadreel heals him, Dean is relieved: “Never do that again!”

When Cas reveals that he had sex with April, Sam and Dean are flabbergasted and amused. Dean asks if he used protection.

Cas expresses appreciation for the boys’ humanity and expects to be able to learn from them: “I do now see how difficult life can be, and how well you two have led it. And I think you’ll be great teachers.”

When Gadreel tells Dean that Cas can’t stay with them, Dean tries to convince him to change his mind, but Gadreel forces Dean’s hand by threatening Sam’s safety.

Castiel’s humanity helps him understand the importance of his relationship with Dean: “Cas, uh, can we talk?” “Of course. Dean, you know I always appreciate our talks, and our time together.”

When Dean reluctantly tells Cas to go, Cas is extremely hurt and incredulous.

9.04 Slumber Party

Dean wishes he hadn’t been forced to make Cas leave: “Hey, look, nobody wants him here more than I do, okay?”

9.06 Heaven Can’t Wait

Cas calls Dean to alert him to a case. When Dean shows up, Cas is standoffish because he’s still upset about being asked to leave. When Dean makes fun of Castiel’s job at the convenience store, Cas gets defensive: “What’re you doing here?” “Gee, it’s nice to see you, too, Cas.” “It’s Steve now. And you surprised me.” “Well, the feeling is mutual. I mean, I knew you had to lay low from the angel threat, but, uh, wow. This is some cover.” “My grace is gone. What did you expect? Do you any idea how hard it was when I fell to earth? I didn’t just lose my powers. I had nothing. Now, I’m a sales associate.”

Dean persuades Cas to join him in the investigation, even though Cas is still acting jilted: “There was another kill over at the high school. You comin’?” “I wouldn’t be much use. I don’t have my powers.” “So? I’ve never had powers.” “You are a hunter.” “And you’re a hunter in training, remember?” “Yeah, I remember. You said I sucked.” “I didn’t say that. I said that there was, uh, you know, room for improvement. Come on!” “Alright, my shift’s over in five minutes, and my date’s not until later, so...” “Attaboy! I’ll go get the car.” “Not just yet. I have to clean the bathroom.”

When Cas is nervous about continuing the hunt, Dean encourages Cas to try to live a “normal life.” Dean drops Cas off for his date and gives him advice and support, recognizing Cas as an attractive man: “Go get ‘em, tiger.”

The angel Ephraim explains that he came because he heard Castiel’s pain: “I just followed the sound of your pain. You have no idea how loud it is. I could hear you for miles.”

Dean recognizes how unhappy Cas is and apologizes for telling him to go.

9.09 Holy Terror

When Dean and Sam encounter Cas on a case, Sam is amused and glad to see him, but Dean is uncomfortable because he knows Gadreel won’t like it. Cas is excited to be working with the boys again.

Cas and Dean bro out about April: “She was hot.” “So hot. And very nice... up to the point she started torturing me.” “Yeah. Well, not every hook up is perfect.”

Gadreel pressures Dean to get rid of Cas, but Dean defends him: “You know what? Cas isn’t in good standing with ANY angel, alright? But here he is, ass on the line, fightin’ the good fight. So tell me, what makes you so special?”

Cas is disappointed when Dean rejects him yet again: “I, um, noticed that you look kind of uncomfortable whenever Sam mentions my leaving. Doesn’t he know that you told me to leave?” “Here’s the deal. When Sam was doin’ the trials to seal up hell, it messed him up, k? The third one nearly killed him. If I’d let him finish, it would have. He’s still messed up, bad.” “You said the angel Ezekiel helped heal him.” “Look, I gotta do anything I can to get him back. Now, if that means that we keep our distance from you for a little while, then I don’t have a choice. I don’t feel good about it, but I don’t have a choice. It’s great to have your help, Cas, k? But we just can’t work together.”

The first thing Cas does when he escapes Malachi’s torture prison is call Dean to debrief him on the situation and tell him that Ezekiel is dead.

9.10 Road Trip

Dean calls Cas after Kevin is killed and explains everything to him. Cas is sympathetic and nonjudgmental: “God, I was so damn stupid.” “You were stupid for the right reasons.” “Yeah, like that matters.” “It does. Sometimes that’s all that matters.“

Cas does whatever he can to help Dean save Sam from Gadreel’s possession, and he tries to make Dean feel better while Gadreel is being tortured by Crowley: “Hey.” “I can’t watch that anymore.” “I understand. It’s not Sam, but it’s still Sam.” “Pretty much, yeah.”

Dean and Cas make amends and forgive each other for their mistakes: “How’re you doin’?” “You wanna talk about me now?” “I wanna talk about anything that’s not Demons sticking needles into my brother’s brain. Yeah, humor me, man. How you doin’?” “Um, I’m okay.” “Good, good. That’s, uh... so, what, you just change the batteries out, power back up? It’s that easy?” “It wasn’t easy, but I didn’t have a choice.” “Yeah. Well, that’s usually how it goes. Cas, I’m sorry.” “About what?” “Kickin’ you outta the bunker. That’s, uh... you know, not tellin’ you about Sam.” “You thought his life was at stake.” “Yeah, I got played.” “I thought I was saving heaven. I got played, too.” “So you’re sayin’ we’re both a couple of dumbasses?” “I prefer the word trusting. Less dumb, less ass.”

When Cas finds out the angel possessing Sam is Gadreel, he flies off the handle with anger, but Dean successfully calms him down: “I get it, but you gotta chill.”

Cas is visibly concerned when Dean tells Sam he’s leaving to be on his own because he feels like he’s “poison.”

9.11 First Born

Cas stops short of extracting all of Gadreel’s grace from Sam because he isn’t willing to let Sam die. Cas and Sam grow closer after Cas explains that his experience of being human taught him that all life is sacred and the ends don’t justify the means.

Crowley comments on Dean’s sense of self loathing: “Your problem, mate, is that nobody hates you more than you do. Believe me, I’ve tried.”

9.17 Mother’s Little Helper

Crowley jokes about Dean’s sexuality: “You’re lying to Sam like he’s your wife, which kinda makes me your mistress.”

9.18 Meta Fiction

When Cas gets in touch with Sam and Dean, he smiles when he hears Dean’s voice: “How are you, Dean?” “I’m fine, Cas. How ‘bout you?” “I miss my wings. Life on the road smells.” Dean smiles at Castiel’s comment.

Gabriel jokes about Castiel’s relationship to Dean: “Your boy toy and I are rolling our way towards your top secret domicile.”

When Cas meets up with Sam and Dean, he notices that there is something different about Dean. When he finds the Mark of Cain on his arm, he looks worried: “What have you done?” “It’s a means to an end.” “Damn it, Dean.”

The song “The Sun Ain’t Gonna Shine” by Franki Valli plays while we see Cas return to his hotel room and call on the other angels for help: “Loneliness is the coat you wear. A deep shade of blue is always there. The sun ain't gonna shine anymore, the moon ain't gonna rise in the sky, tears are always clouding your eyes, when you're without love.”

9.21 King of the Damned

Cas calls Sam and Dean for help with an interrogation. When they see each other, Cas gives them both big hugs. Dean is weirded out by Castiel’s celebrity status and is skeptical of the situation because he doesn’t trust the other angels: “So, you’re done with the rough stuff, and you want us to be your goons?” “Well, you’ve had success at these situations before. If you don’t wanna do it, I understand.” “Who says I don’t wanna do it?”

Dean calls Cas out for being naive, and Cas gives him a concerned look: “Well, I’m gonna say it. Maybe your operation’s been hacked. You know, Metatron’s got somebody on the inside.” “I was sure everyone here was loyal, finally united by a common cause.” “Well, that’s the problem. See, you don’t think anybody’s lying. I think everybody’s lying. It’s a gift.”

9.22 Stairway to Heaven

Dean affectionately refers to Cas as a dork: “I called Cas. He said there’s something going down in Missouri.” “What kind of something.” “He said he couldn’t talk about it over the phone.” “Why?” “Because he is a weird guy, okay? He’s a weird, dorky little guy. But he happens to have an army of angels behind him, and, even though I hate to say it, if we’re gonna take a shot at Metatron, they might be useful.”

Dean is visibly uncomfortable with Castiel’s status among the other angels and teases him for it: “You hold, uh, roll call?” “They like to hear me say their names.” “I know a couple of women like that.”

Dean calls Cas out for naivete again, and some of his lingering resentment bubbles to the surface: “Cas, I know you try to be a good guy, okay? I do. You try. But what you got here, this is a freakin’ cult. Last time you had this kind of juice, you did kill humans, and angels. And you did nothin’ but lie to me and Sam about it the whole damn time!”

Sam is annoyed at Cas and Dean’s bickering: “Will you stow the baggage, Dean?”

Cas is upset that Dean doesn’t seem to trust him or want his help: “So I should just sit here?” “Pretty much.” “No. If you don’t want my help, then I will follow Josiah’s trail to Colorado. I have to do something, Dean.” “Alright, fine, but Sam’s coming with you.” “Because you don’t trust me?” “To help.”

Cas talks to Sam about his concern for Dean: “Does Dean seem different to you?” “Yeah. Lately, he seems to be amped up... you know, on edge.” “Effects of the Mark?” “What else?” “He does seem angry. I mean, he’s always a little angry, but now it seems like more. I think a part of him actually believed that I ordered those angels to, you know... Sam, you don’t do you?” “No, man. Cas, listen, you gotta weird thing goin’ I’m back there. Those other angels, the way they stare at you, it’s like you’re part rock star, part L. Ron.” “They’ve put their faith in me.” “And maybe that’s the problem. I mean, people have been doing messed up crap in the name of faith, in the name of God, since forever.” “Well, I’m not trying to play God. I’m just trying to get my people home.”

The angels make Cas choose between their loyalty and Dean’s life, and he chooses Dean: “You gave us order, Castiel, and we gave you our trust. Don’t lose it over one man.”

Dean recognizes the sacrifice Cas just made for him and tells him he has their support, demonstrating that his faith in Cas has been restored: “So batteries...” “I’m fine.” “No, you’re not. How long you got? Long enough to destroy Metatron, I hope. But without an army...” “Well, Hey, you still got us.” “Dean, those bombers, you don’t really think that I...” “Cas, you just gave up an entire army for one guy. No, there’s no way that you blew those people away.” “You really believe we three will be enough?” “We always have been.”

9.23 Do You Believe in Miracles?

Metatron comments on Castiel’s prioritization of Dean, and Cas doesn’t challenge his assumption: “So Gadreel bites the dust, and the angel tablet, arguably the most powerful instrument in the history of the universe, is in pieces. And for what, again? Oh, that’s right—to save Dean Winchester. That was your goal, right? I mean, you draped yourself in the flag of heaven, but ultimately, it was all about saving one human, right?”

#destiel #dean x castiel #dean winchester #castiel #supernatural #spn #deancas