#bc his inner kid was tickled | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

pinkteapotwriting · 3 years

Note

yasss you’re taking requests <333

can you write a smut with Marauders where it’s readers’ first time and the boys are already experienced so she is kind of nervous(also little insecure about her body bc stretch marks?🤗)

I loooove your writing, have a good day and please take care of yourself!

Marauders x Fem!reader

Warning : Smut, fingering, female receiving, pet names also did not proof read

Word count : 1721

---

I made this more light hearted, thanks for your patience love.

James’ hands were getting lost in your hair, much like your inhibitions. Today was going to be your first time and they knew you were anxious. So they were trying their best to keep things light but still intentional. You were mirroring Sirius on top of Remus, both of you straddling a brunette below you. Sirius however kept pulling away from Remus to pull you away from James. Apparently he couldn’t decide who he wanted to be kissing more. Which was all fine and good, for you. James however was getting frustrated with Sirius’s blatant thievery. Sirius wasn’t in reach though. So you were unsuspecting when his hands drifted down to your waist. Just when you thought you were safe you were being tossed onto your back and James was tickling your sides and you were trying your best not to kick him.

“Jamie, JAMIE stoooop. That tickles!”

“That’s kind of the point. Last I checked you were kissing me. Sirius can wait his turn hmmm?”

“AH stop! Stop it!”

You were playfully slapping his hands.

“Beg then”

Sirius and Remus were now enjoying the show. But then your shirt started to ride up and you pushed your palm against his chest as hard as you could; which surprised the boys. You were quick to pull your shirt down once you sat up and crossed your arms over your chest. Successfully creating a physical barrier to help mask your insecurity. Sirius was now turned around completely. Why were you hiding yourself from them? James felt especially bad.

“M’sorry for tickling you. I thought it was funny, but now I see it just made you feel bad. Are you okay?”

“Yeah I just” you took a deep breath “I didn’t want you to see yet. I thought I was ready and brave enough but I didn’t want you to see my- my”

James reached for your hand as soon as he heard your voice falter.

“Your what, love?”

“I have some stretch marks, and I know it’s ridiculous to hold myself to society's standards about my body size and how I look but it’s hard sometimes.”

Remus was the first to reassure you. He pushed Sirius forward so he could stand beside the bed and pull off his shirt.

“I know what it’s like to feel insecure about my body Y/N. Some people learn to accept and love themselves on their own, but we’re both lucky that we have people that are here to remind us that they find us attractive.”

He chuckled then because you were kind of listening, but really your main focus was running your hand across his chest and tracing his scars delicately. He hadn’t even noticed you edge closer to him until he felt your warm touch.

“I do find you attractive.”

“Really Bunny? We didn’t notice.” Sirius snickered at first, but then he became more sincere. He lifted the bottom of James’ shirt.

“See look, James has some stretch marks too, and we think he’s beautiful.”

Sirius’s head was much closer to James' lower stomach now. Close enough to delicately kiss along each mark. Remus had turned you around now and was resting his chin against your shoulder. Both of you very much enjoyed the beautiful sight of Sirius worshiping James with his lips. Remus starts to do the same for you but on the sweet spot on your neck before whispering in your ear.

“Want Siri to do the same for you, love?”

Your nervous disposition started to dissolve and you found yourself nodding now. Sirius was smiling, not his cocky grin, but one full of the same love and adoration you felt for him. He lifted the hem of your shirt and his palm felt warm against the softness of your stomach.

“Breath honey, you gotta breath.”

You let out the air you didn’t know you were holding at Remus’s reassurance, but squeezed your eyes shut. You didn’t want to see, but the boys wanted you to. Remus slid his hand to grasp your chin and pull your gaze down to Sirius.

“Open your eyes darling, that’s it. See? There’s nothing to be ashamed of.”

Remus had one of his hands in Sirius’s hair now and while it was nice, you couldn’t help but notice James in the same spot at the edge of the bed. He didn’t look lonely, he actually looked pretty pleased with the view. The bulge in his pants made that perfectly clear. You’re not sure how you got away from Sirius and Remus, maybe they noticed the focused look in your eye, but you were able to make your way to James again. This time you were the one to get that pesky shirt out of the way and kiss his stomach and lower abdomen.

“Like this James?”

James adored how timid you were, how soft you traced your fingers across his chest. It was maddening.

“Yes dove, but this is supposed to be about you, no?”

“I guess so.”

“Okay love, we’ve gotta prep you okay? Can we take your clothes off now?”

“Only if the rest of yours come off too.”

Sirius stood up instantly and threw his shirt to the side and yanked his pants off. Once his clothes were off he spread his arms out.

“I’m ready, your turn.”

All eyes were on Sirius now. James hucked a pillow in your honor that hit Sirius straight in the face.

“Shut it you git. Let her take her time.”

Remus furrowed his eyebrows, because instead of the usual angry outburst from Sirius there was a focused look in his eyes. Then he turned around to find you completely naked with your arms outstretched giggling.

“I’m ready, your turn.”

Sirius quite literally dove across the bed. James and Remus didn’t have time to process what was happening. They barely were able to scramble out of the way as Sirius clambered on past him. But he halted as soon as he was in front of you, smiling like a little kid.

And you wouldn’t be separated.

Your fingers locked into his hair, while his hands hooked under your thighs to pull you onto his lap. He fell onto his back and pulled you in chest to chest.

“Sirius, come on. We wanna see her too.” James was getting less and less patient, but Remus was smarter than James and knew how to coax you out.

“My angel you’ve got to remember to breathe.”

As soon as he reminded you you were able to pull away and to your surprise you were panting. Once your breath was level Remus took your face in his hands gently and kissed you. You don’t know how you made the switch but you were now being pulled onto Remus’s lap. There was no control over your body with any of these boys. It was like you were magnetic, it flowed through you naturally to follow their lead now. The embarrassment dissipated all along the way. You needed them.

“Remus please”

“Alright love, who do you want to prep you?”

“Let’s flip a coin.” James suggested.

“There’s three of us, you idiot.” Sirius retorted.

“Yeah, but I figured you don’t even count so.”

“Sirius counts, don’t be mean James.”

Sirius was very pleased you stood up for him. “Thanks bunny, does that mean you pick me?”

“Well… seeing as Remus is the only one not acting like a five year old.”

Remus tried not to look too happy with himself as he led you to lie back against the pillows. James scooted up to the right of you to hold your hand as Remus rubbed the inside of your thighs when they fell open. Sirius looked like he was plotting something, but instead opted to sit beside Remus and flash you a cheeky grin.

“You ready love”

“Yes.”

His fingers lightly trailed your inner thighs. He relished in how sensitive they were. His thumb found your clit and he began to massage gentle circles against it.

“You’re so wet already love, and we’ve barely touched you.”

Sirius grumbled; Remus humored him.

“What was that Padfoot?”

“I said you’re welcome”

Remus slipped a finger inside you now, which had you bucking your hips up which had him pushing his hand against your lower stomach.

“I don’t think I need your help getting her off Sirius.”

“I personally wouldn’t mind his help.”

Remus rolled his eyes at you while adding in another finger.

“You sure about that?”

“Stop being mean to our bunny, I bet she looks so pretty when she cums and your banter is preventing that.”

While James stole Remus’s attention Sirius took the opportunity to tend to your neglected clit with his tongue. The unrestrained moan you let out gathered everyone’s attention. Your thighs began to shake while Remus quickened his pace.

“Si-Siri I can't, it's too much.”

Sirius didn’t stop though. James was still holding your hand, completely mesmerized by your face as you were building to your release.

“Doing so good for us love. Come on, it’s okay to let go.”

You whimpered, James grinned.

“You look so beautiful like this bunny.”

This time Remus let you arch your back. A high pitched whine was ripped from your throat and Remus had to pull Sirius away to keep him from lapping at your cunt. He was able to get over the loss of contact when he saw that your legs were still trembling. He was going to make some sort of snarky comment but the blissed out look on your face had him crumbling.

“Oh Puppy, you look so pretty. Are you ready for more?”

You nodded your head.

“By the way Siri, I think you’re pretty too.”

“See Remus, Y/N knows how to feed my ego. Take notes.”

“You think I want to encourage your behaviour.”

“Yes yes i d- OI James you can’t snog her under our noses like that.”

So silly to think they’d dislike you for the way you looked. It was a battle for who would get to sit next to you in the great hall for dinner. What else would you expect for something like this? You would be sure to make it known you’ll fight for them the same way that they fight for you.

And they would always fight for you.

---

@sunny-bunnny @quindolyn @midnightgremlin @weasleyposts @bluemoonyblurbs @emmaev @agalandhermarvelobsession

#Sirius Black #sirius black x reader #sirius black smut #Remus Lupin #remus lupin x reader #remus lupin smut #James Potter #james potter x reader #james potter smut #Marauders #marauder smut #marauders x reader #harry potter fanfiction #Harry Potter Smut #fanfiction #smut

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flames-tstuff · 3 years

Note

Okay so, um, I hope you don’t mind me requesting something! ^.^ 💕 You always support me and I wanna support you too!

So, Uraraka and Ojiro. Fluff & Tickles. The idea is that Uraraka is stressed out and one way she copes is by coloring, and Bakugou or whoever sees her and teases her, then Ojiro defends her and says like, it’s fine to be a kid sometimes, bc they’ve grown up pretty fast. And so like, the next day they go to a park and swing, he gets her ice cream, then they go back to the dorm and color while watching cartoons, and then a tickle scene happens on the cartoon, and then it leads to him tickling her and hugs and cuddles and friendship. Aaaaa 🙈

To Be a Kid Again (BNHA)

Ojiro wants to show Uraraka that it’s okay to be a kid again sometimes.

Pairings: Platonic Uraraka and Ojiro

Warnings: Bakugou being a jerk, some light angst

Word count: 1.9k

A/N: Omg this is such a cute pairing!! I've never even considered them together, either as friends or as partners. What would their ship name be? Ojiraka? Also, I've never written for either of them, so I hope this is okay!

Uraraka was tired. It had been a long day at school, and despite the fact that it was only Wednesday, she was more than ready for the weekend.

After changing out of her uniform and grabbing a couple items from her room, Uraraka flopped down onto one of the couches of the commons with a heavy sigh. She really didn’t have anything to do now that classes were over for the day. She’d already finished her homework and dinner wasn’t for another or hour or so. Despite how exhausted she was, she had just enough energy left to do one of her favorite activities to pass the time: coloring.

She didn’t know why exactly, but something about sitting down and letting herself get lost in the mindlessness of coloring had always been soothing to her. So there she was, sitting on the couch crisscross, using her knee as a table and getting to work. After a few minutes, the brain fog that had been plaguing Uraraka the last couple of hours began to disappear, and her mind was back as ease.

That was, until Bakugou came into the room. Looking just as tired and grumpy as she felt, Bakugou was about to head up to his room when Uraraka accidentally caught his eye.

“What are you looking at, Round Face?”

She quickly looked back down at her lap in alarm. “N-Nothing. Sorry.”

Bakugou continued to glare her way when he noticed the book in her lap and the pile of markers next to her. He came a few feet closer, eyeing it suspiciously.

“Tch. What are you, five years old?”

“Wh… what do you mean?”

At this time, Ojiro had just entered the commons and was just about to step into the elevator when the other students’ conversation caught his attention.

“Coloring books? Seriously? That shit’s for babies.”

Uraraka felt her cheeks start to burn.

“Hey, hey!” Ojiro jogged over to see what the commotion was about. Bakugou tended to pick fights pretty easily. “What’s going on here?”

Bakugou just crossed his arms and scowled at him.

Ojiro looked down at Uraraka, whose ears and cheeks were painted red. He then noticed the art supplies surrounding her. “Is he giving you a hard time?”

Uraraka just looked back and forth between the two of them, not daring to say anything.

“I heard you say something was ‘for babies,’” Ojiro turned to Bakugou with a stern look on his face. “You weren’t talking about coloring, were you?”

Again, silence.

“It’s really not, you know. People draw and color all the time! Besides, even if it was, what’s wrong with that? Everyone should be allowed to do things they enjoy, especially something as harmless as coloring. I don’t see what the problem is.”

“The problem is that we’re trying to be heroes!” Bakugou shot back. “Heroes shouldn’t be doing childish shit like that! If you really wanted to be a hero you’d be out training!”

Ojiro sighed, a little exasperated. “Of course training is important. But rest is important too. Doing things you love is important. If you don’t take the time to be a kid and let loose a little, you’re going to burn out. No pun intended, in your case, Bakugou.” Ojiro smiled, a little teasingly.

“Ugh, whatever,” Bakugou relented and headed back towards the elevator. “Whatever it’ll take for you to shut up and stop lecturing me.”

Uraraka and Ojiro both snickered at that, and in a few moments, it was just the two of them.

“Sorry about that,” Ojiro said apologetically. “Bakugou can be a real pain sometimes.”

“No kidding,” she agreed. “Um… thanks. You really didn’t have to do that. I’m sure I would’ve been okay on my own.”

“Of course you would have! But what are friends for?” Ojiro smiled brightly, holding out his hand. Uraraka smiled back and accepted the hand up. “You hungry? I think it’s about time for dinner.”

~~~

The next day was just as hard, though Uraraka did feel a little better after a good night’s sleep.

After dinner the previous night, Ojiro had asked if she’d want to hang out the next day after classes, in attempt to keep tabs on her since her fight with Bakugou. She assured him she was fine, but he insisted that it was his treat, so she obliged.

“So where are we going?” Uraraka asked walking next to Ojiro on the sidewalk.

“I’m taking you to one of my favorite places.” The two entered a chain link-fenced area.

“…a playground?”

“Yep! This was one of my favorite places in the world as a kid, and it still is. Come on! Let’s swing!”

And before she could argue, Ojiro grabbed her hand and tugged her along towards the swing set. Thankfully there wasn’t anyone else around, so they had the place to themselves.

“So,” Uraraka started, swinging her legs a little. “Why are we doing this exactly? I mean, don’t get me wrong, I love hanging out! But where is this coming from?”

Ojiro laughed and rubbed the back of his neck, a little sheepish. “I was thinking, well… I wanted to show you that’s it’s okay to be a kid. To let loose a little. You seemed like you needed it, especially after what happened yesterday.”

Uraraka’s heart warmed at that. She really couldn’t ask for better classmates as friends.

Ojiro’s expression dropped to something a little more serious. “I’ve realized that we’ve all had to grow up so fast in these last few years. It makes me kind of sad.”

“Why is that?” Uraraka questioned.

“Don’t you miss this kind of stuff?” He gestured to the rest of the play set. “As much as I hate it, I think you and I both know there’s some truth to what Bakugou said yesterday. Heroes are supposed to be constantly training, constantly trying to grow and improve their skills. All that’s great, but it leaves no room to be what we actually are… teens. Kids. Don’t you ever feel like you grew up too fast?”

Uraraka couldn’t help but think about her parents. How, as just a little girl, barely old enough to go to school, she committed to helping them make money in any way she could. All the experiences she’d missed out on when she was younger due to her family’s financial situation. “Yeah… I guess I do.”

Ojiro offered a sympathetic smile. “That’s why it’s times like these, in the little spare moments we have to ourselves, that we can take the time to indulge that inner child.”

Uraraka took a moment to digest his words. “I think I understand now.” Then, in a small, hopeful voice: “Maybe... a-after we’re done here, we could... um... get some ice cream?”

Ojiro grinned. “I thought you’d never ask.” He hopped off his swing. “Race ya!”

“Hey, no fair!” Uraraka laughed and chased after him.

~~~

After getting their ice cream—strawberry for Uraraka and vanilla for Ojiro—the two friends happily walked back to the dorms together.

“By the way,” Ojiro said, “I never got the chance to tell you, but I saw your coloring book, and well… it looks really good!”

“Oh!” Uraraka looked down, a little embarrassed. “Hah, thanks…”

He could tell she did believe him. “I’m being serious! I think it’s really cool that you’re into that kind of stuff. Have you always liked coloring? You seem to be good at it.”

“Yeah, but I really can’t take much credit. I mean, it’s just filling in the shapes. It’s not like I drew it,” she reasoned, licking her ice cream.

“Hey, I can hardly stay in the lines, so it’s impressive to me.”

Uraraka laughed, knowing he was probably just saying that to make her feel good, but she appreciated it nonetheless.

“Thank you,” she said, speaking as sincere as possible. They had made it back to the common area of the dorms where they stood, waiting to depart to their own rooms. “For everything.”

Ojiro realized she thought he had brought her back here to say goodbye. “Hey, if you want, you can hang in my room.”

“Really?”

“Yeah! We could watch TV, or if you have homework to work on, I won’t bother you.”

She smiled. “I’d love that. Thanks again, Ojiro, you’re the best.” She threw her arms around him in a tight hug. Ojiro was a little taken aback, but quickly returned the gesture.

The two friends sat comfortably on his bed with their backs against the wall. The TV droned on in the background, mostly forgotten, as they chatted about school and their weekend plans.

Once the conversation died out, they settled down to watch what was playing on the screen, falling into comfortable silence. One of the characters poked the other, making them jump back and laugh. Ojiro smiled at the scene and stole a quick glance at Uraraka to see how she was doing, just in time to see her blush a little at the sight. It was so brief, if he hadn’t looked at just the right moment he would’ve missed it.

Suddenly feeling mischievous, Ojiro darted his hands to Uraraka’s sides and began squeezing, making her squeal and fall back on the bed in a fit of happy giggles.

“Ohohjiroho! Eeeep! Whaha—Why? Hahaha!”

“Because! I wanna hear you laugh! Didn’t I tell you to start letting loose?”

Uraraka was too weak and giddy to respond or do much more than weakly bat his hands in a half-hearted attempt.

Ojiro made the mistake of coming closer to get better purchase on her ribs, and Uraraka pushed through the tickly feeling just enough to be able to reach a hand up and scratch at the base of his spine, making him yelp and jerk away. This gave Uraraka just enough time to gain the upper hand by pushing him down and straddling his waist with her knees.

“Uraraka, wa-HAHAHAIT!” he burst into loud belly laughter as she began kneading up and down his torso the same way he had done to her.

“Maybe you should start taking your own advice, Ojiro!” she laughed with him. “Come on, you shouldn’t be afraid of being a kid again, right? Tickle tickle!”

This made his cheeks turn bright red and his laugh go a few pitches higher.

Uraraka was feeling all-powerful with Ojiro now at her mercy. That was, until she felt a soft, feathery feeling against her neck and under her chin, making her flinch and snort.

“Ohohoh my gohohosh, you snohorted!” Ojrio teased through his own laughter.

“N-no fahahair!” Uraraka stammered out as best she could. “You shohouldn’t be allowed t-to use your tahahail!”

“Wehehell too bahad! I’m using it!”

The two stayed like that, trying to out-tickle each other—Uraraka going at his ribs and belly, and Ojiro trying his best to throw her off using his tail to brush all over her neck and sides, both laughing hysterically. Eventually Uraraka was weakened just enough for Ojiro to get her back one last time before they both collapsed in exhaustion.

“Jeez, you don’t give up easy, do you?” Uraraka panted, a big smile still on her face.

“No,” Ojiro agreed. “But you held out pretty long too, I’m impressed.”

After finally catching their breath, Uraraka opened her arms in offering. “Cuddles?”

Ojiro couldn’t have refused the offer if he tried. “Heh. Yeah, cuddles.”

He scooted closer and wrapped his arms around her torso, leaning his head into her shoulder. She wrapped her arms around him in return, resting her head atop his.

And there they stayed for the rest of the evening.

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februaryflowers · 3 years

Text

the world in your eyes

41 (laughing/smiling until your cheeks hurt) + 47 (“we’ll get lost together, let me fall. don’t ever let me come down from your love.” - ten (dream in a dream)) + 57 (seeing the stars in their eyes)

prompt list

warnings: reader is in a blindfold in the beginning (it’s bc jun wants smthn to be a surprise though)

fluff, 709 words, junhui x reader

Jun ties a blindfold over your eyes before taking your hands in his and leading you over the uneven terrain. Grass tickles at your feet as he leads you further and further from the car.

You take a careful step, but the feeling of soft grass against your skin doesn’t change, leaving you wondering where exactly he plans on taking you.

You’re sure Jun has his cat-like grin on his face from his perceived brilliance. He claims that this will be the best date you’ve been on yet, and he doesn’t use those words lightly.

The thought of his pretty smile makes your own grow wider and wider until it pulls at all of your features, even under the blindfold.

“What’s so funny?” Jun teases.

“Nothing,” you sing-song.

“Mmhm,” Jun tsks disapprovingly, causing your smile to grow even more until you can’t contain chuckles and your cheeks have a soft, dull ache.

Jun slows his pace to squish your cheeks. “Who gave you the right to be so cute?” he mutters, causing your smile to falter.

“W-what?” you stutter.

You have no doubt he’s grinning even more at your flustered state.

Before you can get an answer, Jun lets go of your hands.

“Hey, wait!” you cry, only until you feel your boyfriend’s hands behind your head, untying the blindfold.

“We’re here,” he announces.

In front of you lies a small picnic blanket under a navy sea dotted with bright, brilliant stars. The sky is completely clear and the moon casts a soft, romantic glow on the whole scene, making you feel as if you’re in a postcard.

“Jun, it’s wonderful already,” you say softly, brushing your hand against the soft, checkered blanket.

He sits across from you and moves the basket towards himself, pulling out and putting down various food items that you’ve happened to mention liking in passing.

You can’t believe he’s remembered all of them. There are some that you don’t even remember saying you liked, but he still somehow found them.

Of course he remembers. He can’t imagine not remembering. He wants to commit your favorite things to memory, to be able to bring you joy, to make you smile your wonderful smile, just as you are now. Gosh, he will never tire of seeing it. Just a glance at it makes his own appear.

You talk animatedly as he dishes out the food to your fancy plates and miss how he nods along, a smile pulling at his lips from hearing you so enthusiastic about something.

“Here,” he says when you finally quiet down, handing you a dish full of big helpings of your favorite foods.

“I never took you for such a sap,” you tease.

“I’m full of surprises. What can I say?” he replies mischievously.

You offer a small smile at his words before looking upwards, towards the abyss of stars. Falling into a peaceful, relaxing silence, the two of you simply stare at the world around you, in awe that somehow you found the perfect match for yourselves. Your gaze flickers to his eyes, where you can see the beautiful image before you reflecting in them, before you look back up. The only thing you can think about is that the world looks even more magical through his eyes.

In the quiet, Jun’s clinking of silverware on the dishes catches your attention. You watch as he scoops a portion of pasta up and points it in your direction.

“Now you’re trying to feed me? You really have become a sap,” you kid.

But you decide to entertain him and his newfound inner sap, leaning in to take the bite anyway.

It’s then that he pulls the silverware away and puts the bite in his mouth instead. You chuckle, amused, “It’s nice to know you haven’t completely caved.”

He quirks his brow at you. “What could you possibly mean?” he asks dramatically, feigning ignorance.

You’re about to answer when a rush of wind blows by, sending shivers down your spine and taking the words from your mouth. You go to rub your arms, but Jun takes note and slips off his jacket, placing it on your shoulders. “Come on. Let’s go home.”

“To our home,” you correct.

“Right.” He smiles. “Our home.”

#caratwritersclub #seventeen scenarios #seventeen fluff #seventeen imagines #seventeen x reader #seventeen x you #junhui fluff #junhui imagines #junhui scenarios #junhui x reader #seventeen jun #jun fluff #jun imagines #jun x reader #mei's #mei's prompt list reqs #mei.svt

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thefanbasewhore · 3 years

Text

United As One. || Part 2.

Summary: While Din is trying to convince the reader to marry him, the elders show their distaste while the reader finds out something that can impact her decision.

Warning/Content: 18+ please, fingering, oral (male on female), light smut, body hair (bc it's normal!!!) fighting between characters and angst. Also I don't ever write smut... Please be gentle with me lol this is one of my first times.

Paring: Din Djarin/female reader

Clan Leader Din AU

Part 1. || Master Post.

Light seeps through the gaps between thin curtains, eyelids flutter as the sun hits her skin, heat creeps up the nape of her neck, warming her forehead. The brightness makes her squeeze her eyes harshly, she uses her hands to try and face the other way but dead weight against her chest makes it impossible.

Thick brown curls rest against her chest, Din's face appreciating the warmth and comfort of her breast, his own chest pressed against her stomach with small, shallow breaths. She can't see his face, he's too low angled downward, facing the wall but it surprises her. Her eyes widen in embrassment, the sudden feeling to run her fingers through the ringlets that he's decided to show her for the first time.

Din has never removed his helmet in front of her, sometimes in the dark but this was different, his skin pressed against her chest, hair she dreamed about tickling her chin is an overwhelming feeling, to add to it the memories of his last words that Din admitted. She's conflicted, It looks more beautiful then what it felt like in the dark between her fingers but what if she wakes him and he demands an answer? Something she's unable to give at the moment.

"Marry me, I've always known you'd be my riduur since the day I met you."

Despite the nervousness fingers softly tug on the tips of hair that reached his collar, silky and well managed despite being in his helmet and the long night sleep. It's a soft sigh that falls from his lips as nails scratch his scalp, sleepily pushing his hips against her.

A breath his held as she feels the hardness against her inner thigh, swallow breaths still falling from Din's chest signaled he was still sleeping but hips unknowing to himself press harder and again wanting the friction.

Fingers stop, heart beating so fast she swears she can hear it in her ears. While they have laid next to each other many nights in the Razor Crest it was never like this. There wasn't enough room, someone would end up bumping into someone which would end up with a sleepy grunt for Din and him finding else where; leaving the bed for her.

Sex was out of the question, Grogu was the number one concern. Between finding a Jedi, keeping the Crest running before it was destroyed, and keeping up with the baby it never left the time too.

It wasn't by choice, there were many nights Din spent longing over her, greedy eyes running over any exposed skin she allowed, they showered together once after the battle against the Kypt Dragon, skin against skin but the lights cut leaving his creed intact.

Even now asleep all Din wanted to do is touch her, with the child's safety secured, and being able to come back to his clan, there was no reason not to.

He's not, heavy and throbbing against her bare thigh, Din's body weight shifting her pajama shorts up further exposing smooth skin. Finally, she takes in a deep breath, eyes shift to the child that lays feet away from them snuggling a pillow, sucking on his fingers for comfort.

"Mmmhmm." It's a soft moan, breath fanning against the swell of breast, that ever so tease him, hips indistinctly pressing further into her until he's sliding against the junction between her thigh and soaking heat. Shame makes her face red, mostly because of how much she wanted him, wants more.

Din's eyes flutter, eyelashes soothing the skin of her breast with a huff. He says for a second, evaluating the situation: his hardness throbbing, pressed between his girls creamy thighs, the worst part of it being he can feel how hot she is, see the wet spot the formed through the thin shorts, feel it.

The room was suddenly hotter, he doesn't dare move, freezes actually, would be absolutely horrified if she woke up finding him pushing against her. Lips gently lay a kiss against her chest, listening to the beats under her chest.

"Good morning cyar'ika." It's whispered against skin, not meant for her current consciousness, it's followed by a few more kisses, her eyes flutter shut at the feeling, breaths slow at a result. Din's hand press against the bed on each side of her, extending his arms to push himself fully up.

"Wait Din, I'm awake!" Her own hands come to cup her eyes as they catch a glimpse of his forehead. Din pauses, he doesn't move just keeps is face angular.

"Why... Why did you say anything?" Din's voice is caught in his own throat as she grinds her hips towards him. A small groan falling from the pressure against his hardness.

"I..." She trails off, Din looks up replacing her hand with his own, the other hand knotting the crown of her head, tangling into the hair with a slight pull that makes her whine. "I wanted to keep feeling you."

Din feels his own heart beat beginning to speed up, her fingers blindly in front pressing against the smooth skin of his throat, first cupping his chin feeling to thick hair there. Then they press against his throat, feeling the pulse thicken herself. Din might have thought it was more sexual then it was intended, truthfully honest she forgets how human he can really be.. the pulse helps remind her he's just as much as her, maybe even more.

"Din.." The whine of his name wanting and feral shoots straight to his aching cock.

Fingers soak the touch of her chin, gripping it just watch lips part with want, chest heaving that makes Din's face red. He's unexperienced, he'll be the first to admit it but it felt so, so right.

"Do you want me?" He doesn't mean to words like that, it makes him seem as if he is the prize when truthfully he's the lucky one to see her spread her legs further in response. "Can I touch you sweet girl?"

"Please, Please." She chants as he moves closer so he's on his knees in-between her legs. There's a few minutes of silence, he uses them commit this memory of her to his brain forever.

"Din." She's impatient as she calls for him, hand following it's own trail to the hem of her short but Din swats it away, tisking under his breath. "You look..." He gulps, "beautiful, so good for me."

Din's lips move agonizingly slow, pressing a piece of love across her neck, hands cupping both of her breast through her shirt feeling nipples react instantly, hard through the thin material of the shirt. "Keep your eyes closed."

"I-I.." Tears of frustration wet eyes, she want to cry, beg for him to touch her but he's to busy enjoying the feel of her, parts he's never been able to explore before. "The kid."

Suddenly Din feels like an idiot, eyes shifting across the bed, thankfully the kid is still sleeping unbothered. "I'll be right back, keep your eyes closed."

Once the child is safely tucked away, comfortable as Din made sure to cover him with blankets in the other room. Nothing could prepare Din for the sight in front of him, smooth bare legs, breast naked on display with soft nipples, his hand slips further down his abdomen to grasp his own arousal, hard and aching. A small moan makes her head raise but eyes stay closed. "Din?"

"I'm here pretty girl." Din finds himself between her legs again, hands stroke the sensative skin of her inner thighs, she managed to take her shorts off the only thing keeping Din from seeing her naked is the cotton underwear. Din cant help but stare, the light colored fabric left little to the imagination, dark hairs shape against it, the wet patching showing just how badly she wants him.

With her eyes closed, it's practically sensory overload. Her skin can feel his touch so much more, the warmness of him, not to mention his smells, musty and warm, it reminds her of old leather. Ears twitch at how horse his voice is, breath against her skin as lips touch her neck. "Do you, I mean, Do you want me to -"

Din's feels his own skin heat at the words, he didn't have much experience besides when he want younger and one of the clan members went down on him but it didn't feel like this. Nothing can make him feel the way the cry that falls from her lips do. "Please, please touch me Din."

Din mades sure to take his time, spreading the wetness around the bare mound with his thumb, his mouth parting with want. If this was the last thing he’s ever seen, he’d die happy watching her skin flush pink, chest heaving with deep breaths, grinding her desperate, needy hips against own hand.

He loves to watch, watching her mouth open to beg for more but he's greedy, he wants hear more. Hear that he is the reason for her wetness. Fingers pinch the most sensative part of her, eyes open in surprise but Din's too fast, covering them with a hiss. "Eyes closed."

She obeys almost instantly at the rough grunt, eyelashes fluttering against his palm. "I'm sorry I didn't mean to."

"Mhmm." He agrees inside his chest, his hand leaves her completely with a protest but it's soon gone and she's flipped onto her stomach, face pressed against the mattress as fingers dig into her hips, dragging them into the air. He found himself so wrapped up in her he didn't care if she saw his face, all that was on his mind was her pleasure, with her eyes against the wall there was no reason to worry.

His length straining against the back of her thigh, heavy. Pressing kisses against shoulder blades and his hand finds its self between them, lowering her down against the mattress with a hand. His other thumb spreading across her clit, whining with the contact. His finger’s hook inside with no warning, filling her completely.

They're large, there's only two of them as they scissor against her walls, coated with her arousal that helps them trust into her again.

When his fingers find that spot that makes her cry, whine his name he can't help but moan, "Stars, Din."

She squeezes around him, hips naturally fighting his own trust of his fingers. "So, so beautiful."

He groans at the tightness, it sends shivers down his skin. Finger’s never lead up, filling and entering as soon as they left, over and over again until she feels the bundle of heat in her stomach, bubbling for a release.

Din notices as he quickens the pace, chest against her back as he leans to press kisses against her neck, shirt discarded moments ago but neither could remember, lips sucking softly on the skin, huffing in frustration at his own arousal pressing against the back of her thigh for relief.

"Din.." it's a warning that make him suck harder, fingers so good it makes her mewl.

"Cum pretty girl, give it to me."

That's all it takes, from his fingers milking her through, the pretty girls that make her heart leap, his bare chest against her back, something snaps, squeezing against his fingers as a cry falls from them.

Her chest falls and raises quickly against the mattress, Din's fingers don't leave her heat but his head leans against her shoulders with a huff. Blind fingers reach behind her, squeezing his hardness so softly, it's an experimental touch that makes him groan but he pushes her hand away.

"Don't worry about me, I want you to cum again." She wants to protest, wants to say she can't but Din doesn't give her the chance to even catch her breath before fingers are leaving her, the dirty sound of his lips sucking on them making her gasp.

He uses this time to look at her, soaking begging for more under her breath. "Sweet, so sweet."

She couldn't tell if he was talking about her or her the cum on his fingers but eyes didn't miss a beat as legs lazily spread wider for him.

Hands spread across the back of bare thighs, trailing to squeeze a large handful of her cheek. "I always knew you would beautiful like this.. dreamed of it baby."

His arms flexing and expanding against thighs again as fingers curl into the softness of them, anchoring himself as lips closing down around her clit, suckling softly.

“Din!” it's a whine of surprise as his tongue flickers against the sensative bundle, taking his good time with. His fingers finding her heat once again, sinking into the gaping hole, his finger’s moving faster, pace increasing with every squeal, scream or sound that was made.

His tongue doesn't let up from her clit as his fingers pushed deeper inside, purposely messaging the spot found in the deepest of her pussy, his cock throbbing at the thought of feeling it.

Hips lifting off the bed trying to escape his brutal lips, but he doesn't allow it as his free hand fell to hips, roughly pushing her back down against it the pillows. "Stay." The vibrations make her cry, beg for more.

Finger’s curling in her, collecting any juice they possibly could spreading against her as much as he could as hips jolt once again, a soft mumble against her making her moan.

The familiar feeling of heat building up and bubbling in her lower abdomen spreading warmth through out her whole body as he continued to finger fuck her as fast he could. The heavenly sound of wetness dripping to his hand, covering his face and into the bed. "Give it to me, please, please sweet girl."

“I'm -." His name is like a prayer on her lips, his only reply is slamming his finger back into as hard as he could, lips puckering against her clit one more time. Eyes rolling back into her head, as her body let's go, Din sucks up anything he could manage. Her body slumps instantly but Din's finger grabbing her hips saves her from falling harshly against the bed. Loving lips press to her shoulder, laying his cheek against the warmth, slowly lowering her to the bed.

She wants to speak, but can't. Her head is still so high up in the clouds, mind so full with the thought of Din, Din, Din.

"Cyar'ika." The soft words make her heart jump, "Think about it.. I know it's not what you expected but I don't expect an answer right away."

Soft fingers trace her hairline as if they would never feel it again. His other arm wraps around her waist, pulling her back against his chest. Very prominent hardness against her back, but he ignores it. Eyelids flutter close, exhaustion taking over even when his lips meet her neck where he barries his head.

The sun once again is brutal, groaning as she blinks the tiredness away. Reaching behind her to feel for the loss of heavy weight but just to realize no one is there. Jumping up, looking for any sign of the green little monster as well but there is none. She moves to quickly, soreness from her legs reminds her of earlier, cheeks red with heat. It's been no long since anyone has touched her, she would feel it for days.

With shaky legs she stands, dressing rather quickly as she leaves the hut to search for them. The day is like any other, faces that aren't covered with helms show their distaste, while she can't see the other's faces she knows theirs match their conrads.

The temple is rather large, tikis of fire trail to the entrance and for some reason she finds herself drawn to it. The long pull over is stretched across her chest as she wraps it closer to herself as she moves towards the deep rasp she knows as Din.

Symbols and drawings are itched against the walls, the low light of the torches wouldn't let her decipher them, she wouldn't be able to anyways they are written in a language she does not understand. The doorway opens to a large room, space large enough to fit hundreds, tables and chairs fill the majority of it. There's a large throne in the center against the wall, followed by smaller ones that sit directly behind.

Throat dries as eyes run over the familiar plates of beskar covered thighs, up to the small green child who plays with a small stuffed toy on the mandalorian's lap. Basker doesn't notice the new eyes in the room, too busy snarling at the wrinkled men and woman in front of him. They all look identical, long cloaks that cover their baldness, charcoal symbols in a perfect line down their faces.

"No." The words fall from the woman who threatened her lips days ago, Din doesn't like the words as he lets out a huff.

"There is nothing against it, it's allowed." He argues, the elders around him show their distaste with a hiss.

"She is not mandalorian, she will bring shame on this clan. You will shame us Din Djarin." Once again she feels unwanted tears of embarrassment sting eyes, she wish they would just go away, that it didn't bother her.

She wants to curl up and disappear when she meets the gaze of sharp basker, the elders follow suit. "What are you doing here?" It's soft, low.

He doesn't like the look she sports, face twisted in anger, in sadness. She tries to hide the tears, faking a smile as she looks up at him. "I was worried... Grogu wasn't there.. you weren't there."

"I'll be done in a second, wait outside for me cyar'ika."

One of the elders hiss, "Do not speak our language to her, she does not deserve it!"

It happens before anyone can react, Din holds the baby close against his chest, the other hand drips the elder's cloak around the neck line, threatening him with rough gasp. "Don't you disrespect her. You may keep order of the clan but I am Mand'lor. I meant it when I said you have to go through me."

Din's eyes flicker to her, she gulps nervously at the display of power. It fit him so... Well. "Outside, take the child I will be out."

The sound of his voice, the authority in his voice has her feet moving before her brain can even process the words. Grogu reaches out for his mother with a giggle as he's notices her, before Din can turn his head in her direction she's gone.

It's not long after that Din is walking from the temple. Even though his emotions are often masked by his helm, anger just radiates from him. Hot, deep inside his veins. If shows with his slow steps roughly dug into the ground beneath him, shoulders high, alert, his trembling fingers at his side.

"Are.." she pauses, eyes meeting his visor as he's only inches away, towering over her. "Are you okay bear?"

The nickname makes him pause, a rare smile lifts his cheeks pressing his forehead against her own. "I'm fine, everything is going to be alright."

His heart pounds in his ears, heart warm with admiration? Love? Honestly, he couldn't quite place his feelings when it came to her but the nickname made him feel warm, happy at the affection. The nickname was a jab at his parenting, papa bear she called him, ever since then it stuck.

Grogu small hands wrap around her neck, breaking them apart in jealousy as his face finds warmth against her neck. Din rolls his eyes with a chuckle, hand slipping into her free one. The act makes her pause, looking for eyes to see but Din tugs her toward, not caring who sees.

The walk back is slow, cool while they enjoy the spoils the planet offers. A few stares but Din keeps her distracted, "There's a celebration tonight. I want you there."

"No." She admits too quickly for his liking, he sighs stopping movement all together. She feels guilty, redness blooming cheeks. "No one wants me there, I'll just spoil their fun."

"I want you there." He admits, fingers find silky strands of hair, playing with the tips with gentleness. "It's my coronation, it's the celebration of me.. there's no one else more deserving to be there."

Din can't help but notice the awkward shift from hip to hip, trying to shift weight to make standing just a little bit easier. "What is it?"

Cheeks are even hotter as she looks down at her feet. Worried hands tip her chin to meet her own reflection in his helmet. "Tell me."

"I'm just sore is all." It's Din's turn to blush, hear claims his cheeks, runs up the nape of his neck.

"Let's go back, get ready. The child needs a bath anyways." The way the petal like ears raise at the mention of a path with a lifting lip makes them both laugh under their breath.

There's laughter in the distance, the smell of fire, roasting meat, chatting among peers when she arrives. She tucks the child closer as she manages to walk past without being detected, her only concern being to find Din.

Tents scatter across the green ground, the largest which she guessed with hold him. Two mandalorians stand out front, as if they are looking for any kind of danger to pass through. The one's helm shift towards her face, looking her up and down before gesturing her entry into the tent.

Din is seated, a blonde woman's fingers pressing white lines along with symbols that have no meaning to her against his basker on his thighs. His head tilts up towards his girl, a small smile forming underneath the mask. Beads lay in layers on his chest, peaks of flowers tangled between them, he's almost covered from head to toe in white clay.

His eyes never leave hers, despite how nervously she stares at the woman who sat between his legs.

"Hi pretty girl." The words pinch her cheeks red as his fingers mention her closer, the woman kneeling in front him remains quiet. Din can sense her irritation so doesn't dare recognize the fact another woman is between his legs. He presses his hand against his lovers back pushing her close to press their foreheads together.

"Hi bear." The nickname makes him smile again, a simple word that makes him feel loved. Leather gloves stroke the petal shaped ears on the child with a soft coo, "Hey buddy, how was the bath?"

The displeasure isn't hidden on Grogu's face but he still climbs over the chair to his father's lap. The blonde woman looks up from her handiwork with a smile as the curious child peers at her. "Hi little guy."

"I'm done here Mand'lor." Din gives a pleased nod, dismissing her silently. The girl gets to her own knees, angling herself to stand between his legs. There's something about her flirty grin, eyes that meet her own with a looking that just screams, 'I know something you don't.'

Even though it makes her narrow her eyes, it really doesn't matter expect when she bares her neck to them. Wrapped around with a thin piece of string is the mud horn signet that exactly resembles Din's.

She tries not to think the worst, but it seems like a claim of some sort. Like she is his. While she silently moves to exit the tent, a long strand of beads run across the whole length of her hair, dark brown in color.

Din's hands try to move her to his lap but the look of confusion etched across her face makes him pause.

"She wears your signet?" Din is caught off guard, bitting his bottom lip under the helm. While it made complete sense to him, how do you explain it to someone how doesn't understand this way of life.

"Yes." He answers truthfully, "I made it for her."

The words make her take a step back, Din's fingers don't allow her as they fight to move her between the V of his legs. He's successful, stronger.

"I will make you one when you're my riduur."

"but why does she have one?" The hurt can't go unnoticed, pale in color, anxiety making her heart thump faster.

"It's not important."

"It is to me. Why does she have one?" Din doesn't want to talk about it, he wants to enjoy the night, enjoy it with his clan, his son and her.

"She is my breeder." While she doesn't know what it means, it doesn't take a genius to figure it out. She's silent, chewing on the fat of her lip. "Sweetheart?" Din looks up, uneasy with the silence.

"Breeder? You mean as in -."

"Have my children." The fear is answered, "It's tradition, the clan needs an heir. If a riduur cannot produce a child, the breeder will be used. It's nothing to worry about."

"Nothing to worry about? If I marry you and can't have children you will just have them with her?"

He doesn't like it, the way her voice fills with hurt. "Yes but it won't happen, it's just in case."

She's trying to distance herself, Din let's go, he doesn't like the way she struggles from his grasp. "If it does happen what I'm supposed to sit back and watch you two raise a child together?"

"It won't happ -."

"Who picks her?" It's a jab toward him, makes him regret his choice that he made years ago, before he knew her.

"I do but it -." He wants to say it was before her, before he feel in love but watching tears fill her eyes makes him pause, if he had one weakness in this world it would be watching her cry, something he's seen too much over the past week.

"Don't cry." He stands tall placing the child on the chair, with every step towards her she moves further away. Her chest is heavy, heart breaking as tears that slip past eyelids.

"I was never your first choice." Din can see it, the way her eyes show the fear of loving him. Hand pressing against her own chest as if it physically hurts.

"You are, you're my only choice." His words try to reason, hands try to comfort but she presses a hand against his chest to stop him. The wall of the tent is against her back, Din boxes her in.

"It's tradition, I don't want her. I want you."

She shakes her head, tears burn her cheeks. "Your traditions are ugly, I hate it here."

The words make his face drop, heart stuttering in his chest, it hurts. Her defiance, the way she admits those words about his home. He wants it to be her own.

"I can't change them. I can't help them." Her eyes flicker to the beads against his chest, reaching out to feel the hardness of them.

"What were the beads in her hair?"

Din doesn't want to say it but none the less cannot lie. "I don't want to lie to you." It was too much already, it would only bring her more pain.

"Then tell me the truth Din."

"She wears the color of my eyes in her hair."

.."What?"

The amount of time it took Din to even admit the color of his eyes to her was months.. she just walks around parading them and he allows her, he did pick her after all.

"Y-Your eyes?" The words choke up in her throat, bottom lip trembling. "I never got to see your eyes, you said they were brown. The first time I see the color is on another woman. Do the whole clan a favor, take me home and marry her."

"No, No. Stop." His hands grasp her wrist, pulling her close to his chest, the dried clay scratched her cheeks, beads press against her temple. "It was long ago, before I met you. You are my choice."

Tears smear, melting the clay with a cry. She pulls away, "You might want to have her come in and fix that."

Din Djarin is left speechless as he watches her walk away, his own heart breaking inside his chest. Not even a full week home and it's already managed to distance them. Now her own broken heart matching his.

#din djarin imagine #din djarin x reader #the mandolorian imagine

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kashimos-hajime · 4 years

Text

cookies and rings and things | b.b.

summary: “What do you want for Christmas?” “I’ve got everything I want right here.”

WARNINGS: swearing, but it’s all soft, cute and just love!!! lots of love :) pairing: bucky barnes x fem!reader word count: 8.3k

a/n: written for @sunmoonandbucky for no particular reason other than i saw that she needed fluff and i was more than happy to provide. make sure y’all show her some love bc she just ACED AN AUDITION and literally,, i love her,,, so much,,, NOW HAS A SEQUEL TITLED: POSITIVELY PERFECT

“How much do you love me?” she asks, winter gleaming on her bare skin and firelight playing in her eyes. It’s Boxing Day of 2024, the first truly normal one after the Blip, and Bucky watches as snow falls like feathersoft stars outside his window at the compound.

“Count the snowflakes, multiply by a million.”

“Big number,” she muses and he can feel her nails scratch at his waist lightly as her socked feet nudge against his. He wonders what kinda insane person wears socks without any clothes on, but then decides that it’s the kind of person who’s fallen in love with him.

“Well, I love you more than that,” he replies. She wrinkles her nose and snuggles in tighter against him. The fur lining of those ridiculous reading socks tickle the inside of his calf as she curls against him and he doesn’t think he should be able to love a girl this much. Then, he can feel the cold metal of the ring she slid onto her own finger less than twenty-four hours ago and realizes that he had thought a lot of things shouldn’t be possible, and yet they still are.

“Dork,” she murmurs against his neck.

“Lover,” he replies against her ear.

Bucky doesn’t mean to notice her. He’s running laps around the newly rebuilt compound, she has a whistle in her mouth as she shouts drills around the metal thing. Sharp cracks of ‘Pick up the pace!’ and ‘Move it, kids!’ nip at his ears when he runs by and Sam says something about how he’s getting distracted. He hadn’t realized at all.

“Who’s she?” he asks, wiping the sweat from his brow. He’s just finished five laps and he stands on the inner edge of the track, watching as recruits run past. A towel is slung over his shoulder and Sam skids to a stop in front of him, stepping in beside the soldier. The rookies’ shirts are soaked and they pant as they whip past, but none dare to slow down when she stands waiting just a few metres away.

“New trainer.” Sam’s got a glint in his eye Bucky thinks he knows when he says her name. He’s just getting to know the guy but he’s a pretty easy book to read anyway. “Heard she’s a hard ass on the newbies but it’s ‘cause she has a rep.”

“Then they’re getting what they signed up for,” he says shortly. Despite the cool autumn breeze brushing against the thick heat of his neck, his heart burns into his chest as he heaves another breath.

“Alright, walk it off. We meet by the pool in fifteen.” She catches their attention again, and Bucky notices she’s wearing a half-zipped up windbreaker and joggers, and nothing underneath. Not that he intends to notice. Her hair is tied up back, and he kinda can’t help but look at her neck and her collarbones and, oh, no, he’s looking at her black sports bra—

“Dude.” He blinks at Sam’s amused snap. “You’re staring.”

“Shut up.” Bucky’s voice roughens up as his cheeks begin to flash red and he hides his face in his towel when Sam nudges him with a sweaty elbow.

“She’s cute. I can get you her number,” Sam says but Bucky lets out such a strangled sound that both Sam and the cute trainer look at him.

If it were possible, Bucky’s skin would melt off.

“Hey,” Sam calls her over by a name Bucky can barely hear because he’s too busy staring at his feet and wishing the ground would swallow him up. “You’re the new trainer, aren’t you?”

“Yeah.” Her voice is so much softer than before. Guess it’s like that when you’re not yelling at recruits and talking to Avengers. Bucky raises his head, absently running a hand through the few strands of hair that’ve fallen from his ponytail. “You’re Sam, right? I feel like we’ve met before.” She cocks her eyebrow and tilts her head. “Did you use to live in Washington?”

“Yeah, I did.” Sam’s smile pinches his cheeks and Bucky’s lips press together in a displeased frown when a grin flickers across her face. “Did you work in the VA? ‘Cause you’re starting to look familiar.”

“Yeah.” When she smiles, it morphs her face into something startling warm and lovely. Bucky dips his head low, trying to act like he’s not really part of the conversation—a mere bystander—because if he looks at her for too long, he knows it’s just too intense to be anything but creepy. “I think we used to bump into each other at the gym. I was a physical therapist at the office, and—”

“You made cookies any chance you got, I remember now!” Sam exclaims and she laughs loudly. “You always made my vets’ day when your cookies came in, so thank you.”

“Yeah, well, I’m here now. It’s funny how life works.” She shrugs and Bucky can feel her gaze land on him. “Hi, I don’t think we’ve met.” Her name slips off her tongue like poetry and Bucky, midway through a swipe of sweat down his neck, looks at her with narrowed eyes. He doesn’t mean to glare, but he’s caught so off-guard by the sudden change in direction of their conversation that he isn’t even a part of that his face reverts to something less than friendly.

“Bucky,” he says stiffly, although he doesn’t know why she doesn’t know the names of every Avenger. She probably does and is just being polite, a stern voice in Bucky’s head reprimands and he can feel Sam almost sigh in disappointment. “It’s nice to meet you.”

“It’s nice to meet you, too. You haven’t tried my cookies yet, so I haven’t proven my worth but I promise they’ll change your life,” she says, completely unphased. Bucky guesses she’s more than used to grumpy guys. “Fall equinox is tomorrow, so wait just a tiny bit longer?”

“Uh, yeah, sure.” Bucky doesn’t understand the question at the end of her sentence but she seems satisfied with his answer as she shoves her hands into the pockets of her windbreaker. “You probably have to get back to work,” he adds lamely and she turns to look at the compound. The autumn breeze curls hair against her cheek and Bucky bites his lip to resist the urge.

“I’m free later tonight,” she says, eyes squinting a bit when she turns back to Bucky and Sam clears his throat when Bucky himself doesn’t say a word. It’s like he’s drowning in her eyes. There’s something so effortlessly patient and warm in her gaze that Bucky can’t help but just… rest. It’s almost as if he can rest in her presence.

“So is Barnes.”

“What?” He snaps back to reality harshly, as usual. “We’re supposed to—“

“Actually, I can handle it on my own. She, however—” At this, Sam gestures wildly to the trainer who stands there, the beginnings of an amused grin growing on her face—“needs help with cookies.”

“I can’t,” he croaks after a minute of stuttering, and he simply clamps his mouth shut, averting his eyes. She’s too pretty for him.

“I mean, company is always welcome,” she says, but he shakes his head.

“I’ll just get in your way and I don’t wanna mess up your cookies.”

“You can’t mess them up. I always think of something and it always works out.” She reaches over to take hold of his flesh arm and despite the coolness of the day when they’re not running their lungs out, her hand burns against his skin. She gently squeezes his elbow. “Don’t worry so much, okay? I’ll be in the kitchen after dinner in the mess.”

She lets go too soon and slips her hand back into her pocket as Bucky opens his mouth to reply.

“I’ve got to go to the pool,” she says, jerking her head towards the compound. Her eyes flicker to Sam whose grin nearly splits his face. “Bye, Sam. It was nice seeing you again, although I suppose we’ll be seeing a lot more of each other now.”

“Big building,” he says with a shrug. “Who knows?” She chuckles lightly, and then her gaze slides to Bucky.

Her eyes just seem to find his so calmly. It’s magnetic, and if he believed in love at first sight, this would be it.

“See you later, Sergeant.” She magpie salutes and he can’t help but mimic like a monkey, a lazy swipe of his finger from his brow. It’s so relaxed, so slow and he’s slouched on one hip, his metal hand on his towel, that he thinks he’s never felt so light. It’s almost routine—he could get used to this.

Man, it’s so easy with her.

Her smile brightens remarkably and she heads back to the compound with a little spring in her step.

Sam waits until she’s inside before grabbing Bucky by the neck and giving him a noogie.

“You gotta dress up nice, man,” Sam advises like he’s on the same level as Tan from Queer Eye. Bucky stares at his reflection in the floor-length mirror and frowns in response.

“We’re baking, not going to a gala.” Maybe I should take her to one. Get invited to enough of them as it is, a part of him muses, but he quickly chases that thought of his head. “Besides, she just saw us earlier today sweating like dogs so I don’t really think she’ll care if I show up in a t-shirt and shorts.”

“But this is your first date, man. You gotta dress to impress.” Sam shuffles through Bucky’s closet whilst its owner gapes at him.

“It’s not a date.”

“Yeah, and I’m not Captain America.”

“Shut up, Sam.” Bucky catches the pair of dark washed jeans and a cozy little sweater Wanda said would be cute on him. Glancing at his reflection in the mirror, he sighs. The warm white and the dark blue are so not his style. His style is black in different shades and fabrics and he is going to kill Sam. “This? I’ll look like—”

“Husband material. You’ll look like a straight up husband. She will cuff you on the spot,” Sam declares much to Bucky’s annoyance. “Are you gonna wear the photostatic veil Banner programmed for you?” He glances over to see Sam holding the mesh of tech, and he frowns thoughtfully.

“Should I?” He hasn’t had the opportunity to try it on, and although he knows everyone is used to his metal arm… He sighs. This is way more complicated than the forties. “Yeah. Good impression, right?” he says lamely and Sam claps him on the back, helping him seal it to his metal arm. As the nano-sized cells connect to the metal plates, a fleshy color blooms from the shoulder down and he feels like silk brushes against the tiny fibers of his arm. He can feel every single little cell, buzzing in a way that’s barely even noticeable. Bucky hopes that when he doesn’t focus on it, it’ll fade into the back of his mind.

“Atta boy. Come on. We’ve got dinner and then it’s time for your date! Wanda made paprikash.”

“Great,” Bucky intones dully, nerves biting at his stomach. He has no appetite for this. “I love paprikash.”

“We don’t sulk on first dates, Barnes.”

“It’s not a fucking date!”

After a dinner full of questions from Dr. Banner on how the photostatic veil was feeling and from everyone else on why, Bucky volunteers to do the dishes and clean up to make sure everything is spotless for when she comes in. Despite confusion among the rest of his colleagues, Sam assures them that ‘this is the plan, guys. Barnes’s got a hot date coming over.’

This, of course, only results in Bucky threatening to throw a skillet at him.

He wipes down the countertops, cleans the sink, and reorganizes the fridge while he waits for her, and he absently wonders what kind of cookies she intends to make. Chocolate chip, jam, sugar, shortbread…

Ingredients! His eyes widen and he turns to look at the dark pantries in slight horror. I should probably get them out for her. And measuring spoons, that’s what she needs, right? His stomach is in knots as he runs around the kitchen island, trying to find all the tools they might need. He tries to think of when Wanda had last made something sweet—what had she used? He ducks to pull out the biggest drawer, relieved to find three metal bowls of different sizes.

“Small, medium, large,” he murmurs under his breath, and he puts them all out beside the other instruments he thinks might be needed. A whisk, a bunch of different spoons, a glass cup and metal scoops… He glances around and tries to figure out what he’s missed before deciding to just open up every possible drawer and cupboard, and see what pricks his imagination.

He only gets to the second set of drawers when a soft chuckle catches his attention.

Whipping around, he feels his heart drop into his stomach when he spots her leaning against the doorframe. Her hair is pulled away from her face, and she has a book and aprons hugged tight to her chest.

“I didn't want to disturb you,” she says, an impish curl to her mouth. Bucky steps back from the kitchen island as she walks around and her gaze sweeps his collection. “It was cute.”

“Not many people can sneak up on me,” he says, a bit defensive as a flush makes its way up his neck. He doesn’t mean to sound like it, but maybe it’s the embarrassment of being caught that makes him oddly proud of his work.

“Not many people help me bake cookies,” she replies, standing next to him. She sets down the book and aprons down and he can catch the faint whiff of dinner at the mess hall clinging to her t-shirt. His heart hammers hard enough he’s sure even the deaf would be able to hear it as she gently plucks at different tools, thinking about what they will and won’t need.

Not the thing that looks like a weird wire version of brass knuckles, got it.

“Uh, pastry cutter,” she names, returning it to its place without a mistake. “We won’t really need it since we’re not cutting up big portions of fat.”

“Good to know.” He nods and writes that down in his head. “Anything else we don’t need?”

“We can use it all if you want,” she says with a laugh living in her voice. “It doesn’t really make any difference to me.”

“Okay, well, let’s just get started, then.”

“Aprons first.” She unfolds the two things, one white and navy, and the other black. The black one says Kiss the Cook and Bucky feels a flash of heat at the print. “Which one?”

The white and navy striped apron has a blue pocket with tiny white polka dots, the same pattern frilling the bottom and on the shoulder straps. The black, it’s clearly larger and for a man, and Bucky wonders if these were truly the only aprons she had or if she only bakes with guys she’s interested in. A flicker of jealousy runs through him. How many guys cooked with her before him?

Stop it. Not a date. Bucky shakes his head and shrugs.

“Whatever looks best on you,” he says. “Not that either of them would look bad or anything, but—”

“Thanks, Sarge.” Her eyes crinkle when she smiles big enough and she slips the black apron over her neck before sticking out the white and navy one to him. He stares at the piece of fabric for a moment before slipping his arms through and twisting his arms to tie a tight knot. She does the same and it’s pulled tight against her, Kiss the Chef smack in the middle of her chest.

“So where do we start?” He swallows because he thinks he’s just signed up for more than he bargained for. He looks at all these raw ingredients, ingredients he’s pulled because he thought it might be useful and doesn’t even know where to begin.

“First, we have to decide how many cookies and which type,” she says, pulling over the book and making space for it. She opens it up and his eyes widen at all the tabs poking out, different colours surely meaning different things. It’s an organized mess.

With a piece of scrap paper and a pencil, she writes down the number of required cookies. “Around there,” she says with a swift circle around a number bigger than Bucky had thought. “And these are the cookies we can make that everyone can eat,” she continues, writing a list down one side and then sectioning it off with a line, “these include nuts,” another section, “and these will have icing on them.”

“That’s a lot of planning for the fall equinox, ma’am,” he begins, trying not to sound daunted. She laughs, her eyes darting to his face. Her stare burns into his cheek as she shrugs.

“Hope I’m not scaring you away.”

No. Never. “Maybe a little.”

“Don’t worry. I’ll do the math and teach you a few tricks, and you’ll be a natural. Promise.” He’s surprised by how easily he believes her. As she talks about all the different types of cookies, the textures and ingredients one can use, Bucky finds himself slipping. He lets her scoot closer as she shows him how to sift the dry ingredients.

“Just tap it against your hand like this,” she says and Bucky copies her. She shows him how to prep the pan, and he preheats the oven. They mix the dough with their hands, and Bucky watches as her skilled hands manipulate the oily dough she’s created like it’s second nature. He glances down at his own pile in a glass bowl that doesn’t look too shabby, and almost smiles. “Yours looks really good, Bucky.”

“Thanks.” His eyes stick to the chocolate chips and he pokes it with a half-proud smile. “I had a great teacher.” She laughs again. She’s easy to laugh and smile, and every time she does either of those things, something in him feels like it’s going to burst with light. He wishes he was like that, but at the same time, he feels brighter than he has in days. Maybe it’s something about how she treats him like any other guy, or maybe it’s that she makes him smile more than anyone has in a while.

“Well, this is only batch one and two out of like, twenty billion,” she says as they begin to shape their cookies. Bucky had ripped the parchment paper for their trays and laid them flat and while they roll these balls of chocolate chip cookie dough, he can’t help but listen to her go on and on about things she wants to talk about. Life since the Blip, the recruits, hobbies and childhood memories. He can’t help but give his two cents too, and she tilts her head as she listens, a soft smile on her face.

“You’re a great listener,” she comments as he sets the trays in the oven and closes the door. She sets the timer on her phone and begins to prepare for the next batch.

“It was all I could do for a while,” he says with a shrug. “You get good at stuff you do for a long time.” Her actions slow and she turns to stare at him. He focuses on cleaning up his work space, swallowing down the smell of butter and sugar. “Guess something came out of it,” he adds uncomfortably when the silence grows. He looks beside him, at her, where there is a smear of flour across her cheek, where she merely stands there in silence, and sighs. He’s ruined it. “Sorry.”

“Is that why you hid your hand?” she asks softly and his eyes widen noticeably. “I didn’t want to ask to make you uncomfortable, but I did wonder.” She looks down to make sure she’s measuring enough sugar and she closes her eyes for a moment, clearly cursing herself. Bucky wishes he could say something, but his mouth doesn’t click with his brain. “Forget I even brought it up. I’m sorry, I—”

“I wore it for tonight,” he blurts out and she looks at him, eyebrows furrowed together. “It’s a photostatic veil Banner coded for me and… and I wore it for you.”

“Why? It’s not like I’m afraid of it.”

You should be. “I guess I just wanted to be normal for a night,” he sighs and she stops sifting for a moment to really look at him. Setting down the sieve, she leans on the counter and places the other hand on her hip, waiting for him to explain patiently. “Sam called it a date, and I think it got to my head.”

“Oh,” she breathes. He tears off the photostatic veil carefully, letting the mesh crumple in his hands and she swallows. The air is thick with an emotion neither of them can quite name and Bucky is quite sure she will never want to see him again. God, is this what it’s like to flunk a date? He sets down the mesh on a clean countertop, watching the hologram flicker as he flexes his metal fingers. They gleam in the artificial light and he hides it behind his back, shame pooling in his chest.

“I’m so sorry. I… I didn’t want to make it awkward for you,” he mutters and she reaches to touch his metal wrist tentatively. Kiss the Chef wrinkles against her chest and his gaze falls to the floor. He doesn’t quite know how to describe how utterly disappointed in himself he is when she steps closer, fingers curling over his. No pity in her eyes, she squeezes his palm carefully.

“I don’t want you hiding yourself away,” she murmurs, tilting her head so he is forced to look at her. His eyes stare dejectedly into hers and she smiles, using her other hand to cup his face. Powder dusts against his eyes and he squints. The smell of dough clings to her skin and she smiles fondly at him, fingers stroking his cheek. “I like you just as you are.”

“You like me?” he asks, confused, and she chuckles. “All I’ve done is help you make cookies.”

“‘Course I like you, dork. You’re hot.” A teasing bite in her tone, she taps his nose with her thumb before returning her palm to his cheek. “And I know you didn’t have control of anything in your past, and you’re trying your best, Bucky. That’s all any of us can do, now that we’re back.” Her eyes avert for a moment, and then find his again. There is a gooey softness that reminds him of molten chocolate and snow on Christmas eve. “I really do like you, you know. Have a big ol’ school girl crush on you, to be honest.”

“On me?” Why not anyone else? He’s bewildered. Sam, or that new receptionist on two, or even some other trainer because…

Frankly, Bucky thinks he’s lost all appeal to those who know him since 1945.

She takes his silence as rejection and it shows in the uncertainty that mars her face. Bucky wishes he knew how to articulate that he is insanely attracted to her and how the way she laughs makes his heart believe it can jump mountains, but instead he is stunned into a quiet that fills the kitchen. He only met her a few hours ago. How can he even begin to explain it?

“We have cookies to make,” he says instead, eyes flitting to the open ingredients and he turns his head against her hand. She springs apart from him, cold rushing to fill in the space she’s left behind as she draws her hands towards herself.

“Oh. Yeah, I guess we do.” Her face falls and she grabs the sieve, a wobbly smile built on her lips. “Forget I brought it up, then.” She begins to sift her dry ingredients once again and he mentally groans to himself. Why is he such an idiot?

He mumbles her name softly, and she pauses, turning just so to look at him.

“I like you, too,” he says with a difficulty that shouldn’t be there, because it’s true. “I know I just met you today, but you’ve already made me feel… different, I guess”

“Different?” A tentative, stronger smile begins to curl the corner of her mouth and he nods, his lips twitching upwards. His hand, flesh and warm, settles on her hip all on its own, a fluttering touch that he is completely unsure of as he gently turns her to face him fully. She’s so damn gorgeous with flour on her face and eye bags beneath her eyes that he’s sure she will inevitably make his heart burst. It pounds in his head as he tries to grab at reasons he needs to step away, to stay away, but his heart battles his head ferociously.

I’ll hurt you and I can’t stand the thought. I’ll hurt you or kill you or lose control and you can’t stop me and I don’t want to hurt you ever. His brain screams the words H.Y.D.R.A had thrown at him, the looks handlers had tossed at him flashing in his head—terrified, wild dog, monster.

I want to protect you, I want to love you, you light me up, I can protect you. I won’t hurt you. I’ll be better for you, if you could love someone like me. His heart whispers, louder than the silence. It’s the forties boy in him, the son his mama raised and the brother Rebecca loved, and he can recall the faces he’s adored—Steve, Ma, Becca.

“I don’t know how to explain it,” Bucky murmurs and she hesitantly touches his face. His eyes flutter at her gentle touch and she takes it as an invitation to cup his face once again. “It’s just… you.”

“I’m not special,” she tells him bashfully, words brushing against his lips as he closes his eyes for a moment against her hand. When he opens them once again, he finds her watching, transfixed. There is a new serenity in her eyes, one that tells him she is completely enchanted on something that cannot be him—he is anything but an angel.

“You really are.”

“Now, now, Sergeant Barnes.” Her voice is warm as whiskey and he can get drunk off the sound of her laugh. He can feel her smile just by how her energy shifts and Bucky falls, for the first time in his life; he falls harder than he ever has. “Go on like that and you’ll get anything you want from me.”

“Even permission to kiss the chef?” Bucky’s words, thick and hot, jumble in his mouth. Her nose brushes his, sparks tingling in his veins as her hand trails to cusp the back of his neck.

“That permission will always be granted without question.”

He kisses her softly, hesitance laced through his lips and it is only when she crushes him against her does he bury his hand in his hair and kiss her like she is meant to be kissed: feverently, reverently, forever reminded that Bucky Barnes is lucky enough to be completely in love with her.

Bucky is quite sure Sam is in love with his girlfriend in the fact that he’s in love with the fact that his girlfriend is possibly in love with Bucky. Bucky himself doesn’t think that she could possibly be in love with him, but Sam is more than eager to prove otherwise.

“Sam asked what I’m getting everyone for Christmas.” She’s on the shoulder press, the muscles in her back flexing and waning in a slick sheen of sweat while Bucky completes his set of push-ups.

“He’s thinking too far ahead,” he mutters. “It’s only the start of November.”

“Well, you know him. I think he just wants an opinion on what I’m getting you.” Standing up, she grabs her water bottle, squirting a stream of ice-cold water into her mouth before laying down beside him. “What do you want for Christmas?”

He pauses mid-way up from his two-hundredth push-up. “You don’t need to get me anything, doll.” The nickname is still a bit strange on his tongue but he thinks he can get used to it.

“Yeah, but I wanna get you something.” She juts out her bottom lip in an adorable pout, a telltale sign she wants him to kiss her and he leans on one hand to press a quick kiss onto her lips before resuming his workout. He knows the signs on what she wants fairly easily now. He’s grateful she’s spelt it out so many times for him.

Playing with his fingers means she wants attention, a pout is a kiss, suctioning kisses to the neck means she’s feeling some sorta way and he’s more than happy to oblige that feeling. There’s a long list of little tells that Bucky’s starting to think it’s a whole other language.

“How about cookies?” he deflects and she rolls her eyes, getting up and sucking down some more water.

“I make cookies for everyone. You deserve something special,” she argues and he sighs. “I really want to make our first Christmas special.” He lies down and pushes on his palms, stretching out in a cobra pose while she rolls over into the splits. He pulls back into child’s pose while she leans forward and he’s thankful for the silence.

What do I want? he wonders. What do I want that I don’t have already? His eyes drift to her form only a few centimetres away and he thinks, Nothing.

“I’ve got everything I want right here,” he intones seriously, crawling forward and she turns to him, eyes wide. Sitting upright, she changes legs. “I guess I want nothing to change.”

“Dork,” she mumbles, and a sticky heat pools in his face as she pokes his cheek. He sits down and she offers him his water bottle with a shake. He shakes his head, the argument that his own is only in the locker room. “Come on. Locker room’s too far away from me.” A sweat drop tracks down her jaw and he smiles softly, brushing it away. Legs crossed, he takes it without taking a sip. “Besides, I told you you can take what you want. I don’t mind.”

“Okay,” he says, knowing full well it just doesn’t feel right to take back the hoodies she’s stolen from him. Maybe one by one, he’ll take them back and wear them for at least twenty four hours before giving them back. Then, his scent will stay with her. “What do you want for Christmas, then?”

“I—” Her sentence is cut off by an alert on his phone, one they both know not to ignore and she sighs. There is disappointment, their little bubble popped with a simple text. He sets down her water bottle to get it, gut dropping at the message displayed on his screen. “How long is it?”

“Emergency response in Cairo, I don’t know,” he murmurs. Pocketing his phone, he grabs his towel and rushes back to her. He grabs her face and presses a desperate kiss against her mouth, eyes squeezing shut and she mumbles words he can’t decipher against his grieving lips. Her fingers touch his jaw gently, a reminder that he must go, and he pulls away. “I’ll text you as soon as I can.”

“Stay safe.”

He smiles shakily and promises that he will.

“Barnes. We got a package for you.” Sharon Carter’s voice catches his attention from his sniper post and he blinks away the winter sun from his eyes. No movement still. “Merry Christmas.”

The blonde extends a box towards him, a slight smile curling her lips and he frowns at the stark bleakness of it. Black, and absorbing no light, it feels heavier than he thought it’d be.

“Thanks.” He shifts, his bones clicking as he glances out the tiny slit of a window. There hasn’t been movement for weeks. Crossing his legs, he sets the box before him and a tiny blue hologram pops up from a tiny hole in the center. His eyebrows furrow together as it scans his face and he squints.

“Facial scan complete: Hello, James Buchanan Barnes.”

F.R.I.D.A.Y.’s voice echoes in his small little perch and he still thinks it’s weird without having the side effect of Stark in his suit chasing after him to hear the A.I. but he shoves that uncomfortable feeling of the dead man out of his head. That is too much regret to unpack right now on a mission.

The box unfolds, the mechanical whir humming in his ears and a waft of sweet sugar rushes into his face as he peers within.

Cookies. Sugar cookies, butter cookies, frosting and crystal sprinkles, gingerbread, snickerdoodle, a note in her writing.

“She requested I ask you to read her note before eating the treats,” F.R.I.D.A.Y. says and Bucky pulls out her note. “She also requested that you stay safe, despite not being home for Christmas.”

Taking the blue cue card, he sighs at the mere sight of her writing. His heart aches much more than he realized and he wonders if she misses him half as much as he misses her.

Buck,

Times may be tough while we’re apart, but absence only makes the heart grow fonder. Stay safe, Sarge, and come back to me.

Merry Christmas. Forever thinking of you.

When he bites into one of those cookies, he melts into the wall he’s leaning to and closes his eyes, just imagining her standing in the kitchen with that Kiss the Chef apron tied tightly around her. The taste brings back memories, and brings him back home to New York, to her. Home, he muses wistfully, home is waiting for me with her laugh and smell and eyes. Home.

Bucky drops his bags as soon as he’s off the quinjet because he spots the dark blur that is his girlfriend in a track pants and a big poofy parka running down the road towards him. He barely gets his arms up in time before she’s flying into his arms and he lets out a grunt, stumbling back as he flings his arms around her waist and holds onto her tightly. Her legs squeeze his waist as she burrows her head into his neck and Sam laughs as he unpacks the equipment.

“Bucky,” she says, pulling back and his arms hold her to him still, gently supporting her back and her bottom. Her hand cups her face and she brushes hair out of his face, tracing a healing cut on his lip. “You’re home.” She embraces him again, thighs tightening as if she’s afraid to see him leave again and he merely closes his eyes, letting the first day of 2024 snow against his skin. “You’re home.”

“I’m home, lover,” he promises, and she laughs, face wet when she steps back onto solid ground again. He opens his eyes to admire her, a vision; a sight for sore eyes from the arms length he holds her at. The snow melts as it lands on her skin but it nestles in her hair, a frame of white for her pretty face that he’s missed far too much. “God, I’m home.”

She laughs, a watery smile surfacing as she leans up to kiss him. They are rapid, wet with emotion and she smiles against his lips, just laughing in relief. “I love you so much,” she whispers and he blinks, drawing back. Her face is the epitome of happiness as he gawks at her and she wipes at her eyes. “You don’t have to say it back, but I just… I love you.” She doesn’t look afraid, only confident in her feelings for him and he scoops her up, his heart bursting with sunlight.

“I love you, too,” he whispers into her ear, embracing her tightly. She lets out a tiny exhale at his strength but hugs him back tightly anyway. What is love if not hugs that barely allow you to breathe and kisses until you’re dizzy? Bucky doesn’t know. “God, I love you.”

Bucky learns a lot dating her.

She hums when she cuts his hair—which she does every so often—and likes to cuddle in her sleep. She bakes for every occasion she can think of and likes to spoil Bucky rotten. Although their jobs often keep them apart during the day, Bucky likes to just watch her in her environment, ordering the recruits around.

She has a different sport she favours for every season. Jogging in the fall, hockey in the winter, tennis in the spring and swimming in the summer. More often than not, she drags a happy Bucky with her to the rec centre and he’s more than happy to participate, whether he shows it or not.

She expresses her feelings through cooking, which Bucky has learnt the hard way. One time, they got into an argument over something stupid—he can’t even remember what started it—and came to the kitchen at 2AM to see her sitting at the kitchen island crying her eyes out and surrounded by baskets of muffins.

“Lover,” he had called out softly, already too loud for the eerie time between midnight and morning. “You’ve got a bit of a muffin problem.”

“I know,” she had replied dejectedly. “I don’t know what to do with all of it, Buck.”

They had donated it to shelters around the city, going on their own from street to street with baskets full of muffins. It becomes ritual, to have days where they bring baked goods and homemade meals to those who need it.

She doesn’t really know how to take care of herself, based on how she treats herself during assessment season, so Bucky has to pick up her slack and feed her more than caffeine. He feeds her diets that are balanced and healthy, and makes meals that he learns in his spare time to share with her while she shouts herself raw at the soldiers.

He remembers her favourite foods and music, and knows just how to put an exhausted girl to bed with makeup and bra off. He remembers to write when he’s gone for too long during missions, and he remembers her birthday, favourite colour, and which show she’s currently obsessing over. He always downloads the seasons to catch up so he understands what she’s talking about.

It’s safe to assume he knows when to propose, hell, he’d been ready the night they first baked together, but he just has to remember to catch her ring size. There’s so much of his mind cluttered with these useless yet utterly adorable facts about her that he can’t bring himself to delete, that it’s always the one thing he forgets to do.

Here is where his friends come in.

They’re all hanging in the lounge on a lazy autumn day. Their one year anniversary is coming up and Bucky and Sam are watching football while she talks to Wanda about potential plans.

“Popcorn,” Sam says without tearing his eyes off the screen, shoving the bowl in their general direction. Bucky grabs it unceremoniously, popping a few into his mouth while she twists in his grip to pass the bowl to Wanda.

“I have cookies cooling, boys,” she warns them and Wanda chuckles. The witch puts the bowl back on the table next to the empty nacho plate while Bucky’s girlfriend decides to curl against him, and his arm around her waist squeezes her close. His hand trails down to her thigh, hoisting her legs up while she peppers kisses on the underside of his jaw.

“I don’t understand anything about this game,” Wanda intones once commercials hit, amused when Sam lets out a shout of disappointment. Beeping from the kitchen, a timer, breaks whatever retort he was prepared to throw back at the Sokovian and Bucky lets out a whine when his girlfriend unwinds from his lap to get up.

“Sorry, babe, but I gotta get them before they get too cold,” she says and Bucky frowns before nodding. He cups the back of her neck, and she kisses him quickly before pulling away and skipping to the kitchen. Wanda immediately crawls into the space on the other side of Bucky on the couch, pulling out her phone while Sam leans over to whisper.

“She sends me pictures all the time,” Wanda begins nefariously and Sam pulls out a strip of paper, a line in pencil across it. As he rolls it up into a ring, Wanda leans over to show Bucky pictures of the girls’ conversation. “She adores all of them, but she cannot decide.”

“And here you go, man.” Sam gives the paper ring to Bucky. “Got it while she was taking a nap.”

“She wants silver rather than gold,” Wanda says.

“And she doesn’t care about a venue.”

“But she likes the idea of a seasonal wedding.”

“Dude, she wants your babies.”

“She wants two or three kids.”

Bucky’s head begins to spin as they continue to bombard him with facts or proof that she actually wants to spend a life with him, and he blinks, staring at the commercials that still flash in his face. Grabbing Wanda’s phone, he focuses on the images that his girlfriend had sent the witch, gorgeous silver rings with diamonds, some with less, some with more, and simply tunes the two out, trying to internally decide what he should buy her. Meanwhile, Sam and Wanda have fallen into some argument about whether or not Bucky’s wedding is going to be a summer or winter wedding, when a new voice pierces the air.

“Who wants cookies?”

Immediately, a hush falls over them. Bucky tears his eyes away from the phone just as Wanda snatches it back just in time for her to appear, striding into the room with the smell of cookies rushing in after her. She sends them an odd glance, and the trio of Avengers merely separate as she sets down the plate. A fresh batch of chocolate chip cookies are stacked ontop of a porcelain plate and Sam lunges forward to grab one while she picks one up delicately and resumes her place on Bucky’s lap.

“What were you three talking about?” she asks, amused, and he takes the cookie with a click of his mechanical arm. She tucks her head underneath his chin while his hand goes back to her thigh and he bites into the cookie.

“Nothing you gotta worry about,” he says. The game starts again and she can’t pipe up to argue without Sam telling them to shut up, so she doesn’t. Instead, she rests her head on his chest and Bucky hopes she doesn’t hear his heart beating like crazy in his chest.

By the tiny smile he can feel against his chest, she can hear it.

Bucky holds the ring in his pocket for four months.

He had bought it the very next day after the football game because if he had let it sit, the nerves would’ve gotten to him, but now, new nerves are causing him to become paranoid: waiting for the perfect moment, scared that she’ll find out.

He thinks the proposal should be grand and all about how much he loves her and how much she’s shown him and loved him and it needs to be perfect. It is anything but that.

“Morning,” she whispers as her eyes flutter open. She’s laying against him in their comfy, toasty bed, and he doesn’t want to move for Christmas festivities except they both have to—a charity breakfast for veterans where Bucky is speaking, then a novice hockey game because his girlfriend just had to teach the cutest little seven year old boys how to utterly destroy their opponents, and then dinner.

He traces shapes along the slope of her back lazily, craning his head to look at him and she smiles dazedly.

“Hey, lover.” He grins easier now, and when his smile splits his face, her own does too. “We’ve got a day ahead of us.”

“A day that’s way too long for Christmas,” she mumbles, closing her eyes and pressing her cheek against his chest. “Convince me to get up.” It’s still dark outside, a blissful 5AM full of snow delicately fluttering outside their window. He wraps a leg around her waist, pulling her close while she dozes and she lets out a contented sigh at his arm draped over her side.

“Don’t want to,” he replies, eyes closing. “Want you to stay right here with me.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. Kinda want to stay here forever,” he continues drowsily, eyes fluttering shut and she shakes in his arms with a silent laugh. “Wish everyday could be like this.”

“You wake up earlier, and maybe it could be,” she retorts. Of course the early bird in her is perfect for her morning drills with her recruits, but Bucky prefers to sleep in like the owl he is, and he lets out a snort, kissing her hairline. “Just saying.”

“I’m too busy catching up on your shows.” His arm tightens around her.

“Catching up. Liar. I know you were up at 2 AM this morning binge-watching.” She tilts her head up, eyes opening. A spark lights up her face and a mischievous curl of her lip tells Bucky she’s about to say something that’s going to make him blush. “Just admit you like Gossip Girl and go, babe.”

“Alright, I like it.” Rolling his eyes, he pecks her forehead and she smiles victoriously. It’s so adorable that Bucky, with less than three hours of sleep, adds, “God, I want to marry you.”

“What?”

Oh.

Shit.

Bucky is suddenly more awake than if someone had thrown him into an ice bath. She almost throws herself off of him, sitting up and he follows her with his eyes as she twists to turn on the lights. Golden light paints her a goddess, and her hair is messy atop her head as she stares at him with wide eyes.

Bucky sits up slowly, the blanket pooling around their waists, and she blinks at him as he chews on the inside of his cheek.

“Do you not want to get married?” he asks slowly, almost afraid. Although he’s nearly 100% certain she wants to be with him, a part of him still bites at his stomach with doubt. “Have… have I been looking at this wrong?” He doesn’t tear his eyes away, holding this staring contest as she continues to stare at him, lips slightly parted and he reaches over to touch her hand. “You okay, lover?”

“You wanna marry me?” she asks, and he nods slowly, fire rising in his stomach and crawling up his neck as he makes a mental note never to keep secrets from her because when he’s been running on three hours of sleep, he likes to spill his guts where he feels safe.

“I… I got a ring and everything.” He turns to open the drawer on his nightstand and pulls out the dark navy box, velvet brushing against his sleep-numb fingers. “Wanda and Sam helped, and I was going to make this a big thing, but—” He’s tripping over his words as he pries it open, and he watches as her gaze falls to the silver ring, the exact one from one of the pictures Wanda had shown him—”I know I don’t really deserve you, and god, you deserve better than a proposal at 5 AM but I really do want to marry you.”

“Buck—”

“I love you. I love you so much it’s crazy because I didn’t think anyone could love me, or that I could open my heart to someone like you, and I know you deserve more than this, a better man, but—”

“Bucky—”

“All I’m trying to say is… thank you. For loving me.” His sleep addled brain tries to scramble for more things to say, and he smiles, almost sad but so, so, very much in love. “Thank you for bringing laughter into my life again.”

“Bucky, you fucking dork,” are her first words and he blinks as she lunges into his body. The blankets twist and her warm muscles wrap around him as she peppers kisses all over his face. “You wonderful, wonderful man. I love you so much. I love you, I love you, I love you.” His arm props him up against her body as he holds onto the box and she straddles his waist, twisting to look at the box. Her smile is tender as she takes out the ring and slides it onto her finger and he smiles bashfully when she shows him the fit. He lets the velvet box slip from his hand to cup her waist and he sighs blissfully when she leans to kiss him.

“Remember when I asked what you wanted for Christmas last year?” she murmurs against his lips and he smiles as the cool metal of her new ring trails down his neck to his shoulder. “And you said you wanted nothing to change…”

“I guess I just didn’t want anything more than you,” he whispers fondly and she smiles, eyes closing as she knocks her forehead against his. “But this one change I can handle.”

“Yeah?” She opens her eyes to stare deeply into his and he smiles, a warm curl to his lip.

“Yeah.”

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cyn-00 · 4 years

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This is called "it's 8am and I've been awake since 5 and this idea popped into my head but it's not plot-ful enough to write an actual fic out if it"

Or: Moreid fluffy/snuggly/sleepy conversation about Boyband Hair™ bc we were robbed. This is a tribute to it. Vaguely inspired by 5x22 "The internet is forever", when indeed Hotch makes his iconic comment about Reid's haircut. EDIT: I decided in the end to post it on my AO3 too bc 1) I like the idea of having a platform where to keep all my works organized and 2) if u ever wanna re-read it it's easier to find :3

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Morgan's hand sneaked up to settle in his boyfriend's hair, a gesture that had become second nature to the man as much as responding to it with a content purr had become second nature to the genius.

He chuckled fondly and squeezed Spencer's weary frame even more into his arms, shifting to get more comfortable in their lying position on the Doctor's couch.

He relished in their first actual few minutes of real quiet after having managed to wrap up yet another loud, messy, challenging case; tenderly scraping the man's scalp with his fingertips.

When Spencer had popped up in the conference room that morning along with that new haircut of his, Derek's instant reaction had been a seemingly uncontainable jaw drop at the very least, if not a flat out hopefully-not-drooling-on-the-floor kind of situation. Right off the bat he hadn't thought about how he would no longer be able to braid his hair and twirl his fingers around the curls and see the genius sigh annoyedly and give in to pulling it up in a messy half-bun. He didn't mind anyway though. Spencer was gorgeous, how dare he complain.

"So uh...boyband? " he teased.

Reid's giggle came in a hitched puff of warm air tickling the man's throat.

"Stop." he attempted at biting back. It came off adorable, just as expected. Which usually made him even more flustered which in turn made him even more adorable. A virtuous cycle, if you will, to Morgan's eyes - Boy Wonder would disagree.

"Mmh I don't know baby it doesn't really fit you, if you ask me..." Derek joked further, chasing that very virtuous cycle that every time made his heart swell with reverence and disarming affection for the boy snuggled in his arms.

Spencer playfully kicked his calf with a stripy sock-cladded foot. "I said stop!"

The man's chest only thrummed more eagerly with chuckles at the reaction, as he gave in the impulse to tilt his head down and place a kiss on his boy's forehead, covered in a layer of soft hazelnut bangs he wasn't used to.

"C'mon. You know I'm joking." he reassured; Spencer raised his face - until then tucked under his chin - to meet Derek's kind eyes the second the man dropped that little game of his.

"I know." Reid nodded his understanding, the corner of his lips quirking up in a small grin. "And anyway, doesn't sound to me like an insult or anything." he shrugged.

The other's brows shot up. "You got that one right."

Derek cradled the genius' cheek with a hand, preventing him from shying away from what he was going to say. "You do look extremely pretty."

A glimmer sparked up in Spencer's eyes at the compliment, biting his inner-cheek but determined to not avert his gaze.

"...thank you" he replied bashfully; seemingly impossible for the wholesome genius to be unpolite even if there's no need to thank someone for merely speaking the truth.

After keeping up with the man's stare a while longer, Spencer's muzzle couldn't help but reclaim his previous warm spot under Derek's chin.

He laid a velvet peck on his boyfriend's Adam's apple. "That's all that matters to me, honestly."

Morgan frowned. Boy had this habit of voicing his thoughts minutes if not hours after the conversation had come to its end.

"What matters, kid?"

"...that...that you think that of me ?"

Derek ducked his head to bury his lips in Spencer's cloud of brunette strands.

"That I think you're pretty? That what you're saying?" he asked; questions coming out in a half-mumble due to the dampening effect of the genius' mop of hair.

"Yeah." the other simply confirmed, tying his arms tighter around the older man's torso.

"I- I mean... I'm not saying that I cut my hair for you, I mean that at the end of the day I just care that YOU think I'm...pretty."

Derek's already molten heart leaked out of his body. "Spencer... you are my Pretty Boy. Always. Got that?"

To someone external it might've seemed shallow to spend time discussing about whether Morgan thought he was pretty or not. To the couple it wasn't, though, because that last exchange of theirs held a bigger, unspoken value to it, unanimously acknowledged by them both. Claiming Reid was his pretty boy was only the very tip of the iceberg of a meaning way deeper, hinted at through a light-hearted, sleepy conversation.

If Derek hadn't known the man like the palm of his hand, he wouldn't have been willing to bet that he was smiling ear-to-ear. But he did know him like the palm of his hand, and he could also feel that smile hovering millimeters away from his skin.

Spencer nodded vehemently. "Got it. Your Pretty Boy."

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sweetnoctis · 4 years

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my fave bts fics (ao3) i know no one’s gonna see this i just wanna scream abt my faves bc i’m too shy to do it on my other accs

ukiyo (yoonmin) - a mf CLASSIC everyone knows this one. it broke me, shattered me and then pieced me together and shattered me again. the love they have for each other... the fact that its a filthy filthy world and they’re both so broken but the love they share is so... GOD. it burns, and it burns so deep. plus the dynamics between each and every character is so good and amazing and the plot is CHEFS KISS. so many iconic quotes. so many iconic scenes. every time i hear ‘petal’ or ‘darling’ i start sobbing on the spot. the sex scenes are fvcking fantastic

kairotic (namjin) - the plot is DELICIOUS. i love all of metastacia’s works because the dynamic between joon and jin is so GOOD everytime. but god this one had me thinking for days, i was so hooked on it. as the story goes along you just find yourself wanting to hug jin more and more :(( you can really feel his inner turmoil about everything including having feelings for joon, and the way joon is like stfu but also like ilysm lemme unwind you and working so hard to get jin out of a bad situation u can really feel how much they love each other :(( and they get m-m-married at the end cries

Cleaning Clam Shells, Raising Children and Falling in Love (yoonmin) - the chef/restaurant concept is GOD TIER pls we need more fics like this. oh god its so soft, the slow burn hits so so good, the pacing and the realisation of feelings and getting together makes your heart ache in such a good way. the way yoongi seems like a cold-hearted chef but he’s actually a major softie (like he is irl) and the way he takes care of jimin made me blush so much hehe. you only want the best for jimin :(( The kid is so adorable she made me squeal just as much as the romance did. it ends with yoonmin raising a little family together :((

tug of war (we both fell) (taekook) - ah yes the superior enemies to lovers trope. but i guess in this case its more like rivals to lovers?? its so cute and funny they both fight for jimin bc they’re both in love with him but along the way they’re like...wait a min since when was the other guy such a sweetheart and they both fall for each other sjhjhjhdsh (jimins okay!! he only saw the two of them as bffs and ends up w yoongi). its so so soft when they spend time together and get to know each other outside their rivalry, and when they confess its just CUTENESS OVERLOAD GOD. the whole fic is so soft tbh and full of GOODNESS i love it sm

all the sundered things (namkook) - GOD i am such a sucker for namkook. i am such a SUCKER for car sex. tbh i was a bit iffy bc the issue jk struggled with was the car incident he had last year and idk it brought up a lot of bad memories for me bc i was so worried for him and everyone used it as an excuse to shade him so yeah. but it was just structured so well?? the dynamic between the two is smth i really loved, and the dialogue tickled my fancy too .plus the message of self-forgiveness is important and you truly just want good things only for jk!!. fuck the sex scene was really hot so yeah its up there

we should kiss, just like real people do (yoonmin) - GOD THIS FIC. as u can see i am a sucker for yoonmin and yoonminies are the best writers it was simply meant to be. yoongi is tae’s cousin from the city and jimi is tae’s bff. their first kiss was described so beautifully i could feel my heart boom boom. and they’re just so SOFF. when yoongi takes jimin for a visit in the city and jimin’s just so in awe and tells yoongi to ‘kiss me here’ on every street corner is so mf LOVELY i cried real tears. jimin lives above the church and has provided for himself his whole life which is why he won’t accept money help from tae (who is significantly richer) which is what causes a bit of conflict between vmin but its okay and all good in the end and they both get accepted into uni and move in together!!! the way the quotes from the bible used to describe jimin’s love for yoongi is so mesmerising made my heart go BOOOOOOOM. the fics mentioned are in no particular ranking but this one is definitely one of my favourite favourites.

imma do a second post bc this be getting too long

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ticklishpeter · 4 years

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𝐭𝐮𝐚 𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐥𝐞 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐬:

STRAP IN EVERYONE THIS IS A BUMPY RIDE

ok first of all :: here’s my ranking from least to most ticklish (and yes im including lila fuck off): allison, luther, ben, klaus, lila, vanya, five, diego!!!! like theyre all hella ticklish, don’t get me wrong, but khjdfs this is like based on how many spots they have tbh

a whole fckin novel under the cut tbh jhkgfsd

allison’s worst and perhaps only spot is her armpits???? she’s real giggly and v free and open about it!!!! squeals galore m8

luther’s legs??? like his whole legs?? and his feet. and like his neck but only lowkey;;; basically everything that wasn’t effected by the serum

well um… ben’s dead. but he’s about as ticklish and squeaky as a dead boy could be!! he tries to keep his laughter silent bc he’s embarrassed about it 🥺 his tummy’s sensitive as heck but they all have to be real careful just in case they end up summoning something on accident hfwkjs, and his feet are also HELLA ticklish ok

so yeah, klaus’ hips being the WORST is a big sorta community-wide headcanon and i’m so super on board, but also his ribs?? especially the backs of them / his shoulder blades?? and his palms tbh?? he’s screamin

lila’s ribs and inner thighs are like,, hyper sensitive?? but also her butt and tops of her feet? kjsdygh don’t ask me why. she’s also a big squealer and would definitely punch u successfully if u tease her about it ok she’s baby

another baby: vanya 🥺🥺🥺 another rly popular headcanon is that she gigglesqueaks at the slightest touch on her neck/under her chin/around her ears kfjhdgb and i absolutely love it but she also is so squirmy when she gets tickled basically everywhere ,, but only soft tickles bc hard ones overwhelm her lowkey

FIVE’S KNEES OKAY im ON THE BANDWAGON. scribbles or squeezes on or around his knees make him SCREAM BLOODY MURDER and he covers his face almost always bc one time klaus took a picture of his scrunched up red laughing face and he just,,, damn he really wishes he wasn’t in his 13 y/o body bc how ticklish he is just makes him feel like such a baby and he hates it. hiS ribs and armpits are also so so bad. also he’s a kicker for SURE

and diego… wowowow diego. ticklish evERYWHERE ok but he’s also the type to be like squealing and giggling “i’m not! i’m not!!!!” when someone teases him asking if he’s ticklish. he’s a VIOLENT THRASHER and even tho, again he’s ticklish everywhere, get his tummy or his sides??? ur DONE bro he loses his strength but just throws himself around and snorts a TON. he’s also super easily brought to tears and hiccupy cackles (honest to god i could do a whole post about lee!diego i love him so much)

diego's laughter is mostly silent but like you'll hear the occasional squeak or hiccup, which makes him cover his face bc embarrassment and tough boys don't squeak. bouncy shoulders and just trEMBLING w laughter uwu

luther honestly only lets allison tickle him sans revenge kjhdfs any other siblings that try?? theyre gettin grabbed and wrecked ok. but w allison, he just kinda giggles and really gently tries to squirm away uwu

lila’s teases, towards diego especially, are BRUTAL “aww what’s the matter, knife boy? is someone’s tummy a wittle tickwish?” and um,,, while he’s like trying not to break, she gets up real close to his face and gives him this fucking DEADLY teasy grin before wrecking him with pokes. all that combined makes him sNORT n break which lila laughs at and makes him blush even more kwfhjds

fivey uses his teleportation to his advantage,, he’ll sneak up on his siblings, squeeze their sides, and blink away in like seconds so he’s hard to catch, and he’s so COCKY about it all ,, unless he’s being tickled of course, he gets totally powerless

vanya didnt get like any tickles up until like,,,, maybe just this last season lmao but she would always notice the kids having tickle fights or grace giving them lil cheer up pokes so i have in my mind that sissy was the first to tickle her (sissy prob just touched her neck a little too soft and vanya just melted)

and now the ones who tickle vanya the most are deFINITELY allison and klaus

five turns into a fish outta water when his knees are squeezed lmao (aj reference not intended),,, but i just picture his WHOLE body fucking FLAILING and him just kicking like a kid having a tantrum

diego and five both curse up STORMS and hurl HELLA death threats when theyre tickled like,,, anywhere. perhaps bc they always insist theyre not ticklish lmao and so they gotta keep that big boy facade goin somehow (but yk it’s hard when ur a giggle puddle)!!!!

i can just hear them both cackling and squeaking before “YOU FUCKING BASTAHAHAHHHJKSDBDR” and klaus being all teasy n shit like “i dont think i caught that, i’m fucking who now??”

which ofc brings me to my headcanon that klaus, along with allison, are the biggest lers of the family tbh (which is wild bc klaus is my fav and usually with my favs i’m like ✨ur a lee✨ but idk man) tHEY’RE BOTH JUST SO TEASY

let’s face it tbh allison’s basically the mom of the group so she’s def the one that’s giving them tickles if she can tell theyre upset but also so frickin mean in a tickle fight ksdgjy

and i know klaus would just be ruthless as a ler,, and he finds tickles fun and almost relaxing in a way (except for his hips; that’s a death wish) which ofc is no fun for his siblings who wanna torture him hwkjsfg

klaus usually wins tickle fights if theyre one on one??? unless it’s against ben,, which sucks bc he’s the only one who could even wreck ben so to lose to a ghost? humiliating kshdjg, ben can tickle ppl while he’s possessing them by just tickling the body he’s in lmao so yeah he gets klaus a LOT

but as of late, klaus will give ben a few pokes and tickles just to hear his noises bc theyre just,, SO FUNNY to him which usually results in a slap in the face and hella revenger from benjamin LOL

some of them have little things they just repeat when theyre getting tickled and laughing so hard like,,, diego just strainingly goes “nonononono,” lila squeals “shitshitshitshit,” five just grunts expletive after expletive: “fuckingshitihateyoufuckfuck,” and vanya honestly kinda sounds like “sksksksks” bc she starts saying stop but she doesn’t want it to stop so she’s stops herself kdufsjh

you'd think that luther would be able to get away from tickles super easily but all of his strength is just LOST like immediately ,,, and when it's not, he doesn't want to hurt anyone so he just takes it and rolls around so tickle fights have been pretty comical lmao

highkey tho tickle fights between diego and lila are actually like really tough matches??? like there's never really a clear winner bc theyre both just so stubborn and ticklish and would never admit defeat

ray tickled allison ALL the time bro like the precious couple they always were meant to be and ray always took so much pride in the fact that he wasn’t ticklish at all lmaoooo

baby talk teases frickin DESTROY fivey tbh they annoy him so much but they just make him all the more giggly

ok those are all my general ones that came to me right just now at 9:47pm on august 9 2020 lmao

#this is a MESS so i bolded names to make it maybe slightly easier to find anyone in particular #the umbrella academy #tua #tickle community #send me your'S I DARE U

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aqvarius · 4 years

Text

HLITF: This is not the story of your first night: Soma - otona love - chapter 5 summary/translation

two chapters in one day? who is this queen of productivity?! it’s me, adhd tea, hyperfocussing on my newest obsession. if you missed it, you can find the previous chapter translated here or check my new translations page to read from the beginning. my translations masterpost is not rebloggable or mobile-friendly yet but i will update when i make one! otherwise, you can always just search the tag “summary” or “translation” on my blog or follow the links in my previous chapter posts to find the previous posts.

anyway, reading and translating this chapter today too was so worth it, because i can say for sure that this is probably the smuttiest and most explicit chapter of hlitf i’ve ever read in my entire life. it’s also a loooong one.

here we are, in my favourite bathroom in the world.

“mm, it smells good,” you say. you were successfully led to take a bath together and you feel so healed...

soma explains that these bath salts are supposed to be a blend of herbs that relieves fatigue. you comment that the aroma seems to be very effective. soma says that the moisturising ingredients are perfect, so your skin will be smooth.

“my arm is caressed in the hot water, and my heart pounds a little.”

“but his hands slowly rise up and he tenderly loosens my shoulders.”

you think “oh what, it was just a massage...” you feel relieved, but somehow also disappointed. (lmao what a thirsty girl. hlitf mc has the highest libido of any voltage mc out there.)

“but it feels good...”

soma comments that you’re pretty stiff. you reply that it feels so good you’re dizzy, so soma says “then shall we get up and wash our bodies?” as he said it, you were lifted up and your voice came out a little louder.

“it’s embarrassing to be princess carried while naked...”

you get placed onto a bath chair. soma, crouching behind you, gets the soap and lathers it. “is he going to wash me?” you think

“um, i can wash myself,” you say, but he tells you to let him do it. he turns your body back [that had turned to him when you talked to him] and he strokes some foam down your shoulder.

“the way he’s using his hands is a little... suspicious”

your eyes meet soma’s, who is lathering up your whole body from behind, in the mirror.

soma: “it seems that washing with bare hands is the best way to protect your skin”

slkdjf;alskjdfal ahaskjdslkjsda!!!

you agree, but say that it’s a little ticklish. he says that your blood circulation is improved when it’s like this and you’re like "ahh i wonder if that’s true...?” as you tilt your head, soma smiles.

soma: “raise your arms a little”

“when i do as i was told, soma’s hand that was gliding wraps around my breast.”

“with a cushion of foam, he gently strokes the sensitive tip”

“my heartbeat is pounding loudly, but soma-san’s supple hands leave my chest and slide down to my stomach.”

“he washes my whole body like this, stroking me, and then finally rinses me off carefully.”

“next is shampoo,” he says and you’re like “i can wash my hair by myself!” but he says there’s no need to be reserved. so you’re like “then onegaishimasu”. he smiles at you and you decide to be honest. you think he’s being really kind today. he’s always kind, but he’s thoroughly smart. even in the bathtub, he didn’t come onto you teasingly/meanly like you thought he would.

“what’s wrong?” soma asks. you say it’s nothing...

lathering plenty of shampoo, soma laughs a little for some reason and you wonder what he’s smiling about.

i have to just interject here because let’s be honest, we all know soma is setting a trap. of course he’s kind and caring and loves pampering his gf but we all know our favourite high libido mc is going to crack at some point if he doesn’t make a move, and we all know that’s what he wants to happen!! i’m sure he just wants her to admit that she loves when he’s mean.

anyway, soma, who took care of you even after bathing, rushes you into bed. he even held the dryer for you and dressed you in pyjamas...

you’re so scared that you become exhausted? (i don’t really know what this line is supposed to mean: “怖いくらいに至れり尽くせりだったなぁ” someone help me pls)

he brushes your freshly washed hair and kisses you on the neck.

soma: “you smell good”

“is it the same scent as soma-san?”

soma: “your scent is special”

(😍😍😍)

“[his] kiss that descended from the nape of my neck traces my collarbone and goes further down.”

he unbuttons your pyjamas, and the underwear that had just been put on is stripped off.

soma: “you shouldn’t have put it on if it was just going to be removed immediately”

with a soft smile, soma gently kisses the top of your chest. you moan and he presses a kiss to your lips as if to catch a small sigh that leaked from you.

“while our hot tongues entangle with each other’s, his fingertip stimulates the tip of my chest again.”

soma gently narrows his eyes at you when you press your lips together.

soma: “[you’re] cute”

“that’s it...?”

“he’s not saying “it’s getting hard” ... or “[you’re already] like this” ...”

you get kind of embarrassed hearing only complimentary words. but his kisses rain down on your whole body as usual, and your body floods with heat.

soma: “moist and smooth... is this the aroma[therapy] effect”

he strokes your whole body with his palm and your body heats up. eventually, his hand passes over your hipbone and stops at your inner thigh.

soma: “slowly”

“exactly as he said, his slow and supple fingers inserted into my hottest place.”

“the part that was already wet welcomed his finger without difficulty.”

(🔥🔥🔥)

while making love to you with his fingers, soma places his lips just below your navel. after feeling a tickle/tingle, a slight ache comes. you let out a small cry at the sweet ache that you’ve tasted time and time again.

“soma-san always leaves a love mark somewhere”

“that makes me happy...”

ugaksfjlsd she’s so in love~

“as my body and mind were being filled, soma-san’s hardened part touched my lower abdomen.”

“before i knew it, he put on a condom [contraceptives] and was about to enter my ~honey jar~.”

“quickly, come on...”

okay i’m not kidding but seeing that smile after all that sexual buildup was like a shot to my heart. i need to take a quick break because ;laksjf;lskjdsl fasd

as if he heard the whisper in your heart, soma smiles quietly and sinks his hips down [into you].

“eh...? usually...”

“he’d ask “do you want it?”“

even though you think it seems strange, your thoughts fade away at the feeling of his hard, proud, hot mass entering you. quietly, slowly, gently moving inwards, the heat inside your core also increases. you moan his name.

“soma-san’s passion became so hot that my inner walls clenched tightly.”

you wholeheartedly do not want to let go of your beloved person.

you apologise, saying that you just got really into [enthusiastic about] it.

soma: “i’m happy. every time you accept me, i feel blessed.”*

*by accept, i think he means you accepting/receiving him [into your body]. the word used for blessed is shiawase, which can also mean happy/fortunate/lucky.

lskfj he’s normally so teasing but my heart races when he’s sweet too... ;~~;

you moan his name. hanging on his unusually kind words, you are swayed by his waves~

“it feels good but... why... why does something feel different,” you wonder.

being made love to gently, your body is burning, but something is missing.

“is it frustrating when he’s too gentle...”

when you think about it, it was the same with dinner and the bath.

“even in situations when he usually makes fun of me, he’s always smart...”**

**by smart, i think this means like emotionally/socially smart. btw this is reminding me exactly of one thing huedhaut once said in one of his povs (cupid lovestruck valentine, where he worries because he always tries not to take it too far when he jokes with you)

you suddenly remember when he said he would “refrain in the future”. is he keeping true to that declaration? if so... will it always be like this...? what would that be like...

“if it’s like this, it will end with incomplete combustion.”***

***i think by “incomplete combustion” she’s saying that she can’t orgasm lol?? someone let me know if this actually means something else and my mind is just in the gutter

you think that’s sad, for soma too.

you still haven’t seen his face that smiles so happily when bothering you today.

“that’s why... for soma-san’s sake too...”

“maybe i have to honestly say “it’s not enough/i’m not satisfied”.”

but... to say that yourself...

soma: “you’re so cute”****

****he says your name here but mine is still set to anata/you lol

as if you’re being swayed in the calm and slow waves of the sea, your heart sways too.

“i don’t dislike gentle waves but...”

“i want to feel soma-san more...”

“i want to drown in the formidable waves that only soma-san can make...”

“more than anything, i want to see soma-san’s satisfied gaze on me as i drown.”

“because soma-san’s pleasure is also my pleasure...”

even though you’re feeling good, you bite the bullet.

soma: “what’s wrong?”

“you’re not the usual mean/teasing soma-san...”

even the ~gentle waves~ stop completely, and he looks at you directly. you panic bc he pulls out.

and that’s the end of chapter 5. omg the suspense is UNREAL!! was that not the most steamy chapter of hlitf you’ve ever read?! and you know it’s only going to get better in the last chapter, when soma finally unleashes his true ijiwaru self. this chapter had my heart racing at so many points. i definitely enjoy being spoilt by soma, but more than anything i enjoy being teased by him and i think our dear mc feels the same way! something that i love is how she also prioritises his pleasure/gratification? even if it means being super embarrassed because of how mean he is, she just wants to see his absolute satisfaction. something that i realised while reading this story in japanese is that he definitely comes across as a lot meaner/more sarcastic in japanese (except for this chapter where he’s being extra gentle), even more like my eternal star-crossed lover huedhaut.

anyway, let me know if you prefer gentle soma or mean soma! i hope you enjoyed this chapter and stay tuned for the final chapter coming tomorrow (probably)!

i’ve also set up a ko-fi page here and would be incredibly grateful if you would like to support me for translations and being able to purchase more routes to recap in english!

click here for the next chapter

#shusuke soma #voltage smut #her love in the force #hlitf #voltage #voltage inc #voltage otome #otome game #otome blog #otome romance #love 365 #love 365 find your story #summary #translation #どうもこれは初夜どころの話じゃない #恋人は公安刑事 #颯馬周介 #otona love #otkoi

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pan-de-queer · 5 years

Text

all my pieces fit with yours (bechloe)

Genre: Romance

Summary:

“Did they really look like a couple—or a family? Ocean blues turned to watch glowing brown eyes and small pale fingers excitedly pulling at the container. A small smile curled at the corner of the Chloe’s lips, her chuckle fond as she wondered about the family of two seated next to her—the family she’d been accidentally included in by assumption.”

Or: Beca’s a single mom, Chloe sits next to them on the plane, and things get gay but not too noticeably gay (i think).

Author’s Note: Not my proudest piece that ending feels so lacking oof But I tried. Hahahaha just glad i’m getting back into the fandom word by word. Single Parent AU. Unbetaed. (also posting this bc this blog is actually my “main” or whatever my friend said it was and i’m trying to arrange all my writing in one place??)

ao3

all my pieces fit with yours

Flying back home to Florida was both surreal and terrifying. Not that Chloe was scared of seeing her family again, but that she wasn’t ready to have to say goodbye all over again. Los Angeles was beautiful and amazing and she loved her kids and the club she’d finally been allowed to head but home was just different and it had taken her a whole year to adjust to LA after she moved out five years ago. She could already feel the sting of the future tears she was going to shed.

Thankfully, her seatmates were plenty distracting. Not in the oh-great-I’m-sitting-next-to-an-annoying-ass-for-four-hours way but in the oh-shit-this-woman’s-really-fucking-pretty-and-her-child-is-adorable kind of way. They were already seated when she made her way over to her seat. A cute brunette was strapping an even cuter little brunette into the window seat, the little girl giggling as the older one tickled her every time she tried to dodge the straps.

She had finally arrived at the aisle seat of their row, shooting them both a bright smile before collapsing her luggage handle and mentally preparing herself to throw it into the overhead compartment. The bag was a little heavier than she was used to as she’d tried to stuff all her necessities and gifts into one carry-on (she loved her job, but the wages left one a little bit wanting) and her friends had been the ones to carry it for her throughout the trip from her apartment to the airport. She struggled a bit with the carry-on until the older brunette—long, wavy brown hair, cold blue eyes lined with dark eyeliner, a knowing smirk—stood from her seat.

“Need some help?” she asked, smirk small but noticeable and Chloe couldn’t stop the sheepish laugh from leaving lips.

She nodded, smile bright. “That would be wonderful, thank you.”

With the brunette’s help she’d managed to toss her luggage into the compartment and secure it before they settled into their seats.

Chloe turned to the woman with a bright smile, the sincerity pouring from her heart and past her lips. “Thank you so much, I might’ve delayed the plane without your help.”

The woman chuckled, shaking her head. “It was nothing. Although if the plane tips, I’m blaming you.”

Chloe faked a scoff, lips twitching into a smile involuntarily. The girl was cute and had a sense of humor. She thanked the aca-gods for small graces. “Thanks anyways. I’m Chloe.”

The brunette took the offered hand, slender fingers cold and callous. “Beca, and this is my daughter, Erin.”

The smaller brunette waved shyly from her seat, a sheepish smile showing off her missing front tooth. The inner teacher in the redhead lit up. “Hi Erin, it’s nice to meet you. I love your shoes.”

Little Erin beamed at the mention of her PJ Masks crocs, her feet straightening to show both footwear. “Who’s your favorite? Mine’s Owlette!”

Chloe grinned as the fasten belt light glowed and the flight preparations started. She leaned forward slightly to look at the little girl to reply, “Catboy’s my favorite, but Owlette’s really cool, too.”

The redhead didn’t miss the way the older brunette grinned at her reply, all three women settling into their seats as the flight attendants checked on the passengers’ belts. The takeoff was filled with Erin’s excited chatter of her favorite show, Chloe adding to the conversation until the seat belt light turned off.

The redhead watched as Beca got her daughter settled with an activity book, an iPad, and some earphones before setting up her own laptop and headphones. Chloe figured the conversation was over and pulled her own light reading out of her bag before her seatmate turned to her with a slight smirk, icy blue eyes swimming in amusement.

“So, PJ Masks?” the older brunette chuckled, shaking her head lightly as she let her headphones hang around her neck.

The redhead shrugged, grin still bright as she wrinkled her nose. “I’m a second grade teacher. You need to be in the loop if you ever expect your kids to listen to you.”

Beca’s eyes softened as her smirk melted into a gentle smile. “None of Erin’s teachers watch kids’ shows. You’re pretty dedicated. Your kids must love you.”

“I may or may not be their favorite teacher,” Chloe faked an innocent shrug, her smug smirk belying her supposed humility (the redhead didn’t bother mentioning that she was the godmother to twin five-year-olds).

The brunette chuckled, “The humblest one, too, I’m sure.”

The teacher’s smirk widened into a blinding grin in reply, shooting the brunette an exaggerated wink that made the woman blush. The brunette’s eyes skirted to her closed laptop, opening it and starting it up as she settled further into her seat. Figuring the conversation was over, Chloe turned her attention to her book and started reading.

The following two hours were spent working on their own things, the redhead getting so engrossed in her book that she hadn’t noticed the shift in company until she’d shifted in her seat and realized that her shoulder suddenly felt much heavier than normal. She looked to her left to find a head of brown hair and sleek black headphones resting on her shoulder.

The redhead strained her head to see a peaceful smile curling thin, pink lips as the brunette seemed to be sleeping peacefully. Chloe didn’t have the heart to disturb the woman (and, she had to admit, it was a damn cute sight), so she adjusted herself to make the angle less awkward and settled back into her seat. She could feel the slight vibrations from the woman’s headphones buzzing on her shoulder and her eyes strayed from long brown lashes dusting pale, smooth skin to the laptop sitting in front of the brunette.

The screen was dimmed but the teacher could make out the jumping waves and turning knobs as a program to make music and the redhead was silently intrigued and impressed. Before she could figure out what exactly the brunette was doing, a small, squeaky voice piped up past the brunette resting on her shoulder.

“Mommy makes music,” the little girl informed her, noting the way warm blue eyes scanned her mother’s screen.

Chloe smiled softly at the little brunette—Erin, her memory kicked in as she turned slightly towards her. “That’s really cool. And what about you, Erin? What do you do?”

“I’m in first grade! I’m turning six next year!” the little girl declared before the redhead softly shushed her, pointing to her sleeping mother. Erin repeated the gesture, shushing herself as she leaned back into her seat.

The redhead chuckled, smile soft as she whispered, “That’s awesome, I’m a second grade teacher—”

“So you’ll be my teacher next year?” Erin asked, voice hopeful and big brown eyes wide and pleading.

“I don’t know, sweetie, I’m pretty sure I teach in a different school from yours.”

“But you’re my favorite teacher. You’re really pretty and you like Catboy and I like Owlette!”

“Aw, thank you, Erin. I’d love to be your teacher someday.”

“And then we could play my favorite games in class! Like, Faces!”

Chloe gently shushed the excitable brunette again, grimacing slightly as she checked on Beca. At the sight of steady breathing, Chloe let our her own relieved sigh before she turned back to Erin and asked, smile returning, “What’s Faces?”

Erin tried her best to keep her tone quiet, but the excitement was evident in the bouncing girl’s glowing brown eyes. “It’s a game we play in class. Whoever makes the funniest faces gets to be the new leader at game time. I’ve won three times!”

“Wow! So I’m dealing with a champ here, huh?” the redhead teased, Erin grinning proudly in response. “But I know how to make some really silly faces, too.”

“We should play!” Erin nearly shrieked, but Chloe was quick to place her finger over her lips, quieting the first grader immediately. Instead of replying with an affirmative, the thirty-year-old scrunched her face up and crossed her eyes, earning a little giggle from the girl a seat away. The pair played Faces to pass the time, interspersing the strange looks they gave each other with little stories and jokes.

The next face Erin shot the older woman was a wrinkled pout as the little girl’s hands flew to her stomach. Red brows furrowed in concern as Chloe asked, “Are you okay?”

Erin turned to her with big brown eyes and frowned. “I’m hungry.”

“Oh, okay.” Thankfully, the redhead could spot the food cart rolling down the aisle and she turned to Erin with a small smile. “Want me to buy you something?”

“Mommy says not to let strangers buy me food,” Erin pouted and Chloe’s heart melted just a little bit more.

“Well, we’ll tell your mommy that I bought you food right when she wakes up and you’ll be the one to choose it, is that okay?”

The little brunette’s face lit up at the proposition and the little girl nearly jumped over her own mother to look at the offered snacks. As the attendant passed Erin her sandwich, she beamed at the teacher and chirped, “Your family’s lovely. I just got engaged to my girlfriend last month and we’re still talking about kids. I’d love to have what you two have someday. Would you want a blanket for your wife?”

Chloe sputtered at the assumption, trying to find a way to explain the strange situation. Warm blue eyes looked up at expectant brown before the redhead reluctantly settled with, “Yes, that would be great, thank you.”

Did they really look like a couple—or a family? Ocean blues turned to watch glowing brown eyes and small pale fingers excitedly pulling at the container. A small smile curled at the corner of the Chloe’s lips, her chuckle fond as she wondered about the family of two seated next to her—the family she’d been accidentally included in by assumption.

“Erin?” Chloe called, handing the little girl a wet wipe with her free arm, moving slowly and gently to keep the older brunette from waking. The little brunette took the wet wipe and cleaned her hands before handing the dirty cloth back to the redhead’s expecting hand and digging into her sandwich.

The little brunette replied with doe-like eyes. “Yeah?”

“Where are you and your mommy flying off to?”

The little girl’s eyes lit up as she practically bounced in her seat. “To Disney World! And to daddy’s office place, but mommy said we’re going to Disney World!”

Chloe wondered why her heart clenched at the little girl’s reply, a tentative smile flitting on to her lips. “That’s sounds great! So you’re going back home to your daddy, huh?”

“No, we’re just visiting,” the little brunette informed her as she started turning her attention back to her food. “Daddy goed to us last time, so now we go to him!”

“I see,” the redhead hummed, trying to piece together what she now knew. Deciding she didn’t need to (or want to, for now) know much more, she changed the topic smoothly. “That sounds like lots of fun. What are you looking forward to in Disney World?”

Erin declared, “Meeting Olaf. He’s my favorite ever.”

“I love Olaf, too! But my favorite is Sven.”

“Sven is silly.”

“So is Olaf!”

The girls giggled until the attendant returned with the blanket and provided it with a beaming smile. Chloe listened as attentively as she could to the little six year old who prattled on about the wonders of Disney and how she was going to own her own island one day like Moana (although if Chloe remembered that movie correctly, that wasn’t quite how the film went) while slowly and gently draping the blanket over the girl’s mother. The conversation lasted for another good thirty minutes before Erin finally finished her sandwich, face covered with crumbs and sauce as the little girl played with her sticky fingers.

“Erin, sweetie, could you please clean yourself up?” Chloe sighed fondly, managing to dig out another handful of wet wipes (single-handedly, as she’s been doing for a majority of the flight) and slowly hand it over to the five-year-old.

The redhead watched the little brunette make horrible attempts at wiping herself clean, the teacher’s affection for the child growing with every savage attempt to scrub away a stray spot. With a fond chuckle and soft shake of her head, Chloe slowly reached out to wipe off the crumbs and cheese on chubby pale cheeks (still all too aware of the head on her shoulder) before the plane jolted everyone forward.

A small squeal slipped past Erin’s lips as Chloe gripped her armrest for support.

“Wha-What’s…?” Beca straightened, cold blue orbs foggy as she tried to piece together what was happening.

The seatbelt sign lit up as the captain announced some turbulence and Chloe moved to quickly secure Erin’s belt before urging Beca to wear hers and pack her things away. As the turbulence continued, a soft little whimper left Erin’s lips as the little girl held her hand out for support. Beca reached out instinctively, pale slender fingers curling around chubby white ones—only to be pushed aside as Erin started to shake.

“Chloe,” big brown eyes started to water as the five-year-old held out her shaking hand. The redhead turned to Beca uncertainly, silently asking for permission with a slight tilt of her head. Beca held her hands up in defeat, cold blue shining in quiet amusement as the teacher quickly reached over to grab hold of the little girl’s chubby hand.

Chloe rubbed soothing circles to the back of Erin’s hand and hummed and sang softly in hopes of getting the little girl to stop shaking. It took some more gentle coaxing from both women to get the smaller brunette to lean back, chubby little hand still clutching Chloe’s, as the turbulence slowly passed. Eventually, Erin fell asleep gripping Chloe’s hand and it took another few minutes for the older women to gently pry Chloe’s hand out of Erin’s iron grip.

Beca chuckled at how lost the teacher seemed.

“It’s fine, Chloe,” the mother shrugged. “Thanks for being so great with her.” Beca paused, head ducking as a blush spread up her neck. “And for, uh, letting me sleep on you.”

Chloe ignored the flutter in her stomach. “Erin’s amazing and it looked like you needed the rest.”

“Still, thanks, I know how weird it can get having to sit with a bunch of strangers on a long ass plane ride.”

“It’s a pleasure, really. Erin’s very charming.” Chloe paused before giving in to the curious voice in her head. “You and your husband have raised her very well.”

Subtle. Nice.

“Oh, no, I’m single. Never married or anything.”

“Oh, sorry! I didn’t mean to assume, and Erin said you two were going to visit her father.”

“Ah yeah, well, it’s—it’s kind of a weird story. Not that I regret it, or anything, or that it’s a bad memory. Erin’s the best thing to ever happen to me, but it’s still kind of weird.”

“Well, I’d love to hear it. That is, if I’m not prying too much.”

“Nah, it’s fine. Um, well, uh, I met Erin’s dad in college. He was this weird, overenthusiastic nerd that worked with me at the campus radio station. I found him really annoying at first, still do sometimes, but he got to me eventually and we started dating a little before the end of our freshman year. He’s an amazing guy, and one of my best friends, but just before our senior year, we both realized we were gay—so we broke up. Again, kinda funny and kinda weird.

“A couple weeks after we broke up I found out I was pregnant with Erin and, well, Jesse—that’s my best friend, ex-boyfriend, and second favorite gay—wanted to keep her. We had a huge argument about it. Didn’t talk to each other for nearly a month unless it was to shout at each other. Eventually, I got… attached—and decided to keep her… And I’m really glad I did.”

“Erin’s lucky to have such amazing parents.”

Beca could feel the heat crawling up her neck as steel blue strayed from the redhead back to her sleeping little monster. “Well, she makes it easy.”

A soft smile curled full pink lips as the redhead watched Beca wrap her little girl in the blanket she’d been using. The warmth spreading in her chest wasn’t completely unfamiliar, but the redhead couldn’t quite place what—exactly—it was. All she understood was that Beca and Erin were going to be two very unforgettable women.

Clearing her throat (and her thoughts), Chloe tried to keep the conversation going. “So Erin tells me you make music? Is it, like, a hobby or…?”

Beca leaned back in her seat, the usually shy smiles Chloe had gotten used to shifting into a confident smirk—clearly this topic was Beca’s expertise. “Yeah, I do both, actually. I’m a music producer by profession and mix tracks for fun.”

“That’s so cool! Do you get to play your original mixes at events and stuff or are they just for you?”

“Uh, well, I haven’t dj-ed at an event since Erin was born. I just make them for my friends and Erin nowadays.”

“So what you were working on earlier on the flight, was that for work or for fun?”

“It can’t be both?” Beca chuckled at the redhead’s pointed brow quirk, shrugging as a teasing smirk curled her lips. “Fine, okay, that was for fun. I was making Erin a mix that she could listen to once we got to our hotel. I was kinda hoping it’d keep her usual restlessness at bay while I unpacked and stuff.”

Chloe softened at her admission, ocean blues melting just the slightest as the brunette tried to play off her words. “Has anyone ever told you that you’re an amazing mom, Beca?”

Thin pink lips pursed at the compliment, Beca’s blush crawling slowly and steadily up her neck as she ducked to try and hide it.

Chloe found it cute how Beca would be so confident one second and fall into a blushing mess at even the smallest compliment. She’d only known Beca for a handful of hours and the teacher already felt such a strong fondness for the woman. Chloe never believed much in fate or destiny, but she had a gut feeling that there was something different about the Mitchell girls.

Leaning back in her seat, Chloe’s sly grin turned soft. “You know, Beca, I feel like we’re going to be really fast friends.”

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jejakgorengan · 4 years

Text

7 February 2020

Insecurities

I know for well that insecurities is something come from within us. It’s not something that someone brought to you. But the way it relapsing is of course by social interaction. Seeing something may tickled your inner feeling, punching your gut, stepping on your dignity.

It’s early in the midnight, I feel that I misfitted to everywhere I thought I belong, I know it’s kinda bullshit reading this from me, but feeling is there and has always been there.

I grew up as a last child from a mediocre family, both of my parents were a state worker/civil servant. My neighborhood was a good one, in terms of how close we are. But as that reflect on how close we are, we are way too close that people could easily call name, especially on me.

Man, I grew up being called wide-face, flat-nose, bencong, and others, but those three were the things that I remembered back in days. They still do call me with that when I come back (my current home is different with my neighborhood growing up).

I know they did that for the sake of joking around. But for a kid and teenage that really affect on how I perceived myself and it lingered up til now. I lack self confidence (not in public speaking maybe), but in believing I appeared or looked good enough and I knew that I’m still not til now. When seeing a mirror, a photograph, and other things that reflect on my physical entities.

Growing up, I rarely noticed the feeling. It was not until high school hits and college came. Back in high school it happened so rarely, I barely remembered if I ever have a breakdown back in that day, but I do knew I had one time or two.

Hitting college and post-college, it feels as it come more often.

The feeling of misfitted, abandoned or left alone. The feeling of wronged someone, rejected, did something wrong or is that your best is not enough and never be.

Those feeling were revolved around like a traffic in a metro city, stuck.

You know,

I’ve been saying that my older sister got a culture-shock when she went to college, resulting in her late graduation, and I’ve bragged that I didn’t get shocked because of the culture.

Who am I kidding.

I am as shocked as she was. And people around me was shocked too.

I am not from around. I barely understood the way the interact to each other, but I remembered what it used to be, what it makes me feel. I’m trying not to victimized myself, but it does feel hurt, it just I rarely confronted it on a face-to-face, afraid of crying in public as I am a weak-heart.

Oh man, I remembered it so well, as if it was yesterday. Back in first year, it’s probably the first two or three week of college. One of a friend sort of scold me for wearing nearly the same outfit. In a comedic manner, saying I probably got no other outfit or things (back then, I thought you’re not allowed to wear tee, but for real I lacked in outfit, only brought one suitcase). It’s not feel hurt right away, but when I was back in my room, choosing over what to wear, is it good enough sometimes it hurt.

One other time in second year of college, we were doing a presentation. While my friends are up in the front did his presentation, one of my other friend said things to me. She sort of comparing me to him, probably bcs we physically quite similar, with big body/fat, but she referred that the other guy was way cleaner than me, has a better appearance despite we have a close physical profile.

Or in other time that people scold me for using a fairly loud tune and intonation in opinion, whilst I thought it just a normal way I talked.

You know, those kind of thing said and never then thought of, but it does lingered. Despite I have a good relationship with those friends, I do and always remember it, and it affects my life for sure for real.

Not try to justify myself, but I obviously did the same thing to people.

Also in a joking manner, like others did.

And I knew one, two or more it’ll probably lingered on them too. I apology for that, but it sort of become the part of our daily interaction. Maybe not our, but at least in my surrounding it is.

What a rambling post this is.

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maknaesdancersrappers · 6 years

Text

🎶 You've been playin' hard to get with me all night, we both know exactly what you want right 🎶

a/n: y’all hoES ARE LUCKY THIS SOUNDED APPROPRIATE AS A PART TWO TO ALL I WANNA DO HMPH

this is very long bc i decided to add in this one request i was also not aware of until recently so there IS a keep reading line, but once again, if it doesn’t show up on your app, I’m sorry, that’s not my fault anymore.

Shall we go to hell?

Never in your wildest dreams did you think that the cute, chubby kid back in elementary had grown up to be such a fucking god--more so have his head between your legs and abuse the fuck out of your clit piercing.

“Oh my god.” You gasp out when you feel Jaehyun suck your piercing back into his mouth for the nth time since he’s gone down on you, disturbing the bundle of nerves yet again and sending spikes of pleasure through your system.

He chuckles, dragging his tongue flat against your entrance. “You’re probably the sweetest pussy I’ve ever tasted.” Two of his fingers enter you, curling inside of you as he slowly pulls them out.

You buck your hips against his fingers, making him pull back to enjoy the show of you fucking yourself.

“Look at you,” Jaehyun smirks, “Enjoying yourself?” He grounds his palm against your clit and moves his digits in and out of you. “You’re so wet, can you hear that?”

You do and you never thought the squelching sound of Jaehyun’s--or anyone’s--fingers pumping into you would turn you on so much. Your hands have gripped the sheets by your hips as you feel the knot in your stomach tighten.

Jaehyun must have known you were close, maybe by how you were holding your breath or how your walls are tightening around his fingers, so he ducks his head back down, assaulting your clit once more to push you over the edge while adding a third finger.

You moan out loud; and you swear you sound like a pornstar. Your hands grab onto his hair, weakly trying to pull him away when the knot in your stomach unravels in a second.

He continues to move his fingers inside of you, riding your high out and slurping up your release.

As you catch your breath, Jaehyun sits up and admires his work; your pussy bright pink and dripping. You whimper when he spreads out your folds and the cold air of the room tickles you.

You push the hair that had stuck on your sweaty face away and cover your eyes with an arm, “I never came so quickly from oral before.” You confess with a breathy chuckle, “How many girls did you practice that mouth on?”

“It’s all I’ve ever done.” He admits, making you look at him, “I mean, I’ve had sex--like twice, but most girls I’ve been with are the type to wait until marriage, so the most I’ve done with my exes are oral.”

“Well, don’t worry it paid off.” You gesture for him to come down and when he does, you lick your release on his chin that he didn’t bother wiping away.

“Holy shit.” He breathes, bringing his hands up to your face to hold you still as he kisses you, tongue invading your mouth so you could taste yourself on him.

You moan at the salty sweet taste; sliding your arms over his torso and being reminded he is still fully clothed.

Jaehyun’s lips leave yours and trail down your jaw and neck. His hands find your boobs, roughly kneading them into his palm.

“S-so the time you had sex--” You panted, combing your fingers through his hair.

“--sucked. Both instances were boring because she only wanted to do missionary.” He moves his mouth over one of your nipples, swirling his tongue around it.

You relax back against the pillow and looked up at the ceiling, savoring the feeling of his warm, wet mouth over your breasts. How can someone not submit themselves to Jaehyun if they knew what he could do? How good his hands and mouth feel? Your pussy involuntarily clenches at the thought of his dick.

“Hey,” You sighed, biting your lip when he sucks a little too hard on your boob that’s sure to leave a mark. “I had my way with you for body shots, why don’t you have your way with me in bed?”

The vibration from his chuckle tickles you a little, “Are you sure about that? I’ve had some pretty wild fantasies.”

“Did you think about them with me?” You whisper, waiting for his reaction.

His flushed cheeks and bobbing Adam's apple had you grinning in a burst of pride and elation. Pushing yourself up, you reach for his shirt and start to unbutton them for him.

“How did you imagine me, Jae? Did I spread my legs for you?” You stretched your legs out for him, placing them over his thighs and displaying your piercing in full view at him.

Jaehyun’s mouth parts, suddenly feeling parched.

“Did I straddle your hips?” In one swift movement, you did as you had suggested. You pushed his dress shirt off, licking your lips at the sight of his perfect skin beneath, and started to push yourself up against him, “Did I ride you like this?”

You feel his sigh on your chest before his hands travel up your waist to play with them again after he throws his shirt away. Your own hands trace over his pectoral muscles down to his abdomen, gently scratching at the firm skin.

“Tell me, Jae.” You whine, throwing your head back when his lips start to kiss your neck. “Was I on all fours while you take me from behind--”

“Yes.” Jaehyun chokes on his reply, sounding desperate when you’ve hit jackpot.

“Yes?” You push him away, amused. He nods and you smirk, “Then show me.”

He waits a second, staring at you with such intensity that makes you regret your words. But then he’s pushed you off, leaving you on your back as you watch him work to get his pants off. He doesn’t break eye contact for one second and in the back of your mind, you remember seeing his photos on social media; the ridiculous DP blasts for org events or some confessional post on an anonymous-based group that fawn over him. None of those pictures looked like the boy in front of you; eyes piercing, dark and hooded with lust.

Once his pants and boxers are pushed down and off his long legs, his cock bobs up, standing fully erect and red at the tip.

“Turn over.” He growls and you respond a little late, his hands shoving you to get on your knees and pushing your upper body against the bed. He exhales harshly as his eyes glazes over your bottom, your pussy starting to glisten again in anticipation.

You yelp in surprise when his palm smacks the side of your ass, the stinging sensation making you clench your nether regions. “Shit, what happened to being the university’s nicest?”

He spanks you again, this time on the other side. “I never claimed to be nice.”

You inhale deeply when you feel the tip of his cock teasing your entrance; running the head through your folds and brushing ever so slightly against your piercing, making you flinch.

“My ex didn’t even let me have sex with her unless I had a condom on.” Jaehyun grumbles, stroking his cock with the head just barely entering you.

He turns to everyone reading this, “But that doesn’t mean you should go sleeping around without a condom, okay? Stay protected, kids. This is only fiction.”

Slowly, he penetrates you, filling you up until his cock is fully sheathed inside you. He groans out a curse when you tighten around him, his fingers digging into the skin of your hips. “That feels so good, fuck.”

He gradually starts to thrust, pulling out with the tip still inside before easing back in. He doesn’t pick up his pace until you whimper, sticking your bottom out a little more. The slight shift in position has made all the difference because it gives Jaehyun deeper access and his cock is already hitting the sweet spot within you.

His hips snap into yours, the sound of skin slapping against skin joining the creaks of the bed as it thumped on the adjacent wall.

You’re a moaning mess, hiding your face into the pillow while grasping at it, desperate to hold something to anchor yourself from Jaehyun’s thrusts. You find yourself shaking at a sudden release, legs quivering as they struggled to hold your weight up if not for Jaehyun’s hold on you.

“You feel fucking amazing.” He drives his cock into your sopping cunt with more force than before that has you screaming into the pillow until your throat felt raw.

All of a sudden, there’s a knock on the door.

“Hey! Keep it down, would ya? You’re not the only people in the house.”

You didn’t hear them clearly and continued to bawl out moans.

“Hey! I said keep it down or I’ll have the guys bring the door down and escort you out!”

A guttural sound comes from Jaehyun when at the threat made against the two of you. He’s not going to let anyone disturb him just because you couldn’t shut up. He spots your undies on the bed, snatching them up and balling in his fists while he forces you to move your head to the side. He stuffs them into your mouth, effectively shutting you up as you gag on your own underwear.

There was a sarcastic ‘thank you’ outside the door but Jaehyun ignores it, pinning your shoulders down as he uses it to anchor his weight over you.

“Are you that much of a slut that you can’t keep your voice down? Huh? Do you just want everyone to know you’re being fucked right now?”

You groan, tears springing from your eyes when you feel another orgasm building up.

“I’m so close, [Y/N]. So close.” Jaehyun grunts, “Come for me one more time.”

He snakes one hand down to toy with your piercing and this is where you lose it; thrashing against him when his fingers teasingly tug at the metal ball. You clutch onto the sheets with one hand and grab his wrist with the other, trying to stop him but by the time he lets you stop him, you’re climaxing for the third time tonight. You feel warm liquid spurting out of you, coating your inner thighs and soaking the bed below you.

The realization that he had made you squirt had triggered his own release: Jaehyun pulls out, shooting his cum far enough that you can feel bits of it landing on your shoulder and the space by your eyes on the pillow.

For almost a minute, the room is silent save for the sound of you and Jaehyun catching your breaths. You slump down on the bed, taking your makeshift gag out of your mouth and moving your jaw around.

“You okay?” You hear Jaehyun above you, his body still hovering over your frame.

You twist around despite your body screaming at you not to and lazily grin at him, hands sliding up his sweaty chest and circling around his shoulders. You pull him down until he’s flush against your body, his head resting on the junction of your shoulder and neck.

“Yeah.” You sigh, playing with his hair. “That was amazing. I’ve never squirted before.”

“You’re welcome.” Jaehyun chuckles and you enjoy the vibration of his bare chest against yours. “I feel bad for whoever sleeps here, though. We should probably remove the sheets as a warning or something.”

You snort, “Well, the university’s nicest is back.”

He sits up, kneeling back on his knees.

Your eyes instantly fall down to his dick, “Are you still hard?!”

He shrugs, “Not completely. Don’t worry, I know you’re probably sore.”

“If you hadn’t gagged me, I would suck you dry.” You let your sights linger on his face. “Hey, scoot up here.”

“Doesn’t your jaw hurt?” The worried tone in his voice warms your heart.

“It does, but I have other ways.”

When he climbs up higher your body, now straddling your waist, his cock perfectly sits between your breasts.

You push them together, using them to stroke him. “How does that feel?”

Jaehyun puts his hands on the headboard above your head. “Oh, shit, that feels nice.”

“Yeah?” You bite back a smile when you see him lazily thrusting with his eyebrows bunched up.

It only takes a few more minutes with soft urging from you for him to ejaculate the remaining semen he has to offer. You strain your neck to catch his release with your tongue, lapping the salty sweet substance up.

“God damn, [Y/N].” Jaehyun drawls, pushing his hair back with a hand.

“You’re oddly sweet. Every other guy I’ve blowed are salty as fuck.”

He laughs, “I like eating fruit? I eat two fruit cups from Starbucks everyday.”

“You can get two bowls of fruit at the salad bar I go to for half the price of two Starbucks fruit cups, Jae. Stop supporting those capitalists.”

“Show me where and I’ll treat you a bowl.” He winks, making you giggle. He moves to get off of you, collecting his clothes off the floor and starts dressing.

You do the same, slipping your nightie back over your body and throwing your denim jacket on. You take your panties and slip it into Jaehyun’s back pocket. “For you.”

He blushes, the color rising from his cheeks to the tips of his ear. It was hard to believe he was pounding into you minute ago, slapping your ass, and gagging you with your own underwear.

You continue to watch him put on his clothes, thinking about how people will react when they find out that their golden boy is just another name on your list of fucks. You’ll probably receive some hate messages from troll accounts, but it’s nothing you’ve dealt with before. As Jaehyun buttons up his shirt, you start to feel empty: just another lay.

You stand up, sparing a glance at the bed with the mess you and Jaehyun made. “Oh, wow, did I squirt out that much?” Your eyes widened at the huge wet spot evident on the blue sheets.

“Let’s just strip the sheets off and hope the owner isn’t waiting outside.” Jaehyun starts to pull off the fitted sheets from the foot side of the mattress.

You deal with the other end, reaching across the width of the bed to untuck the sheets. Your eyes catch something glint from the light and you gasp.

“How hard did you come for you to shoot your load on the wall?!”

He looks to where you’re pointing, face starting to turn beet red when he realizes what you were talking about. “Well,” He clears his throat, “Couldn’t have done it without you.”

After stripping the sheets off and throwing them with the soiled pillow on the ground, you and Jaehyun make your way out the door.

Before you can open the door, he stops you.

You shoot him a questioning cock of your brow.

“Hey, I gotta ask--since we’ve been clearing up rumors earlier.” He licks his lips, “Why don’t you do relationships?”

Your lips quirk upwards, “It’s not that I don’t do relationships. Guys only want one thing from me, as you had just experienced.” You gesture to the bed before trying to open the door again.

“Wait, but what if,” He hesitates just a second more, “What if I want more?”

Seeing that you were clearly taken aback from his words, he starts explaining, “I meant what I said earlier about liking you since we were kids. I just didn’t know what your type was and if you even liked me back. I think it sucks that guys don’t even bother trying to date you, I mean, you’re beautiful and funny--I don’t get why you’re barely passing when I clearly remember you being top of the class in elementary.”

You fail at trying to smile, “No one’s trying to set me straight, I guess? It’s always party here and party there. I’m only reminded to study when there aren’t parties and those are days before midterms and finals.”

“Well,” Jaehyun says a little exasperatedly, “I can be that guy for you. We can have study dates on school nights and I’ll take you partying during the weekends. We can... we can do anything you want--together, you know? As in, like a couple--if you’re open to the idea--”

“Really?” You stare up at him, amused at how he’s stumbling over his words. “Anything I want? Like, candlelit dinners, walks on the beach, sex in the library, and all that jazz?”

“Yes! Anythi--wait, did you say sex in the library?”

You burst out laughing at his reaction as you nod, “It’ll be nice to relieve some stress after we study, no?”

“I guess...” He pauses, “We?” Jaehyun is smiling at you with both famous dimples ever present on each cheek.

“Yes, ‘we’. Who else?” You reach for his hand and intertwine your fingers with his, “Now, that salad bar I was talking about is open 24/7 and I would like to redeem that fruit bowl offer.”

He squeezes your hand back, opening the door for you. “After you, then.”

a/n: hit me up when u wanna reserve a spot in hell

#nct scenarios #nct smut #jaehyun scenarios #jaehyun smut #spotify drabbles

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