#and then hears the commentators say things like Coming In From the Back

[leilanihours]

# IMGONNAGETYOUBACK

pairing: paige bueckers x ex-gf/iowa!reader

word count: 4880

warnings: suggestive content, arguing

summary: your "rivalry" with a certain uconn blonde has its speculation, but no one knows what happened behind the scenes

from lani: why is every single thing ive posted based off of a song..anyways..hope yall enjoy this as much as i enjoyed writing it

AS YOU SLIP into your black jersey, adrenaline courses through your veins. you and your teammates have successfully carried iowa to the final four of march madness. you've all come this far and refuse to break the streak.

but similar to your previous game against lsu, there's a lot of speculation surrounding the tension on the court with uconn. people are going crazy over the paige bueckers and caitlin clark face-off, but they’re going even crazier over your own heated interactions with the blonde.

the internet has decided to constantly pit you two against each other after observing your intense taunting and confrontations in previous years. they believe that it’s merely competitive tendencies but they have no idea where it all actually stems from.

you haven’t always been a hawkeye. for your first two years of college, you were a husky through and through. the public knows this, of course, which adds to the stigma around your name. but after a season-ending injury, you decided you needed a change of pace and environment. it was nothing personal against your teammates, coach, or school in general, you just felt like uconn wasn't where you were supposed to be.

so after you were in the transfer portal, everyone went ballistic. there was a plethora of reactions - some encouraging and supportive, others targeted and calling you a "traitor."

that's what the public is aware of. but they have yet to discover the deeper scars.

"you gonna lock in, y/n?" one of your teammates asks from behind you. turning around, you are met with caitlin, the other hawkeye under extremely close observation tonight.

"i gotchu," you smirk, "what about you? you gonna carry the team again?”

"you already know," she says, mirroring your expression. the two of you have gotten very close over the past couple years, which honestly makes the whole paige situation worse as people make comments like "caitlin and y/n versus paige is crazy" or "ready for this 2v1 game tonight!” they piss all three of you off but really just add to the hype and buildup of the game.

soon enough, your coach is ushering all the girls out of the locker room and onto the court. screams and cheers fill your ears as the crowd observes your entrance. and damn, if your ego wasn't high before, it definitely was now.

the two sides of the arena were filled, one side a sea of navy and white, the other a myriad of gold and black. music blasts from the speakers and makes the walls shake with energy. as you make your way over to the bench, you raise your arms repeatedly to get the crowd going. gaining an immediate reaction, you smile big and put your hand to your ear to play into the praise.

your teammates shake their heads at your antics. they know how competitive you can get. you tend to interact with the crowd and cameras a lot, but no one (especially fans at home) complains.

the crowd before you quiets down for a split second as you focus back onto what your coaches are saying in the huddle. suddenly you hear echoes of booing and other taunts as everyone turns around to see the uconn girls run out excitedly. the last one to come out is none other than paige bueckers, blonde hair in her signature braids and ponytail immediately catching your eye.

part of the reason people always compare you to her is because of how similar you are. your game style, skill set, and energy has always resembled the husky's, but you never understood it until she does the exact same hand motions you did but to the uconn supporters.

as she turns away from the crowd, her eyes dart around to find yours, doing so in a matter of seconds. her icy blue eyes sending a chill down your spine and she hold intense contact. fuck. she knows exactly what she's doing. 

you can tell from the few seconds your eyes are glued to hers that she still wants you. you just know. there's too much emotion behind the stare, saying everything that needs to be said and more.

coach bluder gives the run-down on defensive assignments quickly and explains some of the plays. somehow, by some force of nature, you're stuck guarding the one person you were conflicted with: number 5, paige bueckers.

your teammates all turn to you as soon as the words leave your coach's mouth. they are well aware of your special history with the blonde as well as your complicated relationship now.

"you got that, y/n?" caitlin asks you.

"yeah," you shrug, "you don't have to worry about me. i'm good." and you meant it. you were sick of being compared to paige all the time and were ready to show people who's better.

did you still care for the girl? of course; you always have and always will. but will you let that get in the way of your winning streak? hell no.

the referee beckons each team to the center of the court for the tip-off. hannah sets herself up for the jump ball, standing across from aaliyah edwards on uconn's side. 

you confidently walk over to where paige is standing. your eyes meet hers once again as you wordlessly dap her up, offering a civil front. you already know you'll being seeing the clip on your feed a lot tomorrow morning.

despite the cordial interaction, your mind is running wild at the feel of paige's long fingers brushing against yours. you missed her like crazy, but were also upset with her for multiple different reasons. right now you were enemies, opponents, rivals. but in a few hours after the game? well you would have to wait and see.

the ref throws the ball in the air and aaliyah manages to get her fingers on the ball first to swat in her teammates' directions. uconn almost immediately turns it over due to paige missing kk's pass as the ball goes out of bounds. it's just too easy.

------

the buzzer sounds loudly, signaling the end of the second quarter and halftime. you and your teammates jog to the locker room, sweaty and out of breath. the score was currently 32-26 with uconn in the lead.

you had to admit, that definitely wasn't your team's best first half but you were ready to come back twice as hard.

"c'mon guys," lisa yells, "we gotta seriously up our game right now and fight against their defense. keep giving them as many fouls as possible.

"caitlin, we're gonna try to give you more threes, so everyone else, if caitlin has the ball set those screens, got it?"

you all nod wordlessly as you pay attention to her words. your coach turns to you, looking you directly in the eye, her stare deadly.

"y/n, you gotta push bueckers more, don't direct all your focus on getting cait the ball. really use that energy that i know you have."

"yeah i hear you," you pant as you wipe your forehead with a towel. 

one of the coaching assistants hands you a waterbottle, so you immediately squeeze the ice cold water into your mouth without putting the nozzle on your lips. it's a habit that you have whenever you're in a rush or busy thinking about something.

"and one more thing, y/n," you hear your coach call you before you make your way back on the court, "please, for the love of god, leave your emotions out of it tonight."

the words shoot a prick in your chest, not expecting such a direct statement. nonetheless, you nod firmly, agreeing with her as you jog to where your team is lingering.

you may or may not have had a few...touchy altercations with a certain number 5.

like in the middle of the first quarter...

------

"bueckers with the lay-up, does she get it? no! it is rebounded by l/n!"

your hands grasp the ball tightly under the net but before you can make your way over to the opposite side of the court, another set of hands on the ball stops you.

you look up to see paige also grabbing the ball as it sits in your hands, starting to fight to get it in her possession. with the two of you pulling back and forth, the refs whistle blows to put an end to the quarrel.

however, you two continue to push until one of your teammates wraps their arms around you to pull you off. walking away, you laugh, energized by the interaction. you put your hands up in surrender as kate releases you from her grip.

you turn your head back around to see that paige has also been forcefully pulled away by one of her own teammates with a similar expression on her face, clearly as equally as fired up as you.

------

and the middle of the second quarter...

------

"THREEEEEEE! Y/N L/N!"

you flex your arms and let out a proud yell. it's your 4th score of the night and you feel amazing. your teammates clamor over to you, patting you on your back and bumping you with their chests.

paige failed to block your attempt, putting her arms up and jumping but not being able to reach the ball before it falls in the net.

seeing her tough front falter for a second, you point a finger to her just to spice up the game a little more and get the crowd really going. she shakes her head and chuckles darkly, waving you off with a hand.

"did you see that? bueckers and l/n back at it again with their supposed rivalry, what a dynamic duo, am i right?"

------

time flies rapidly as the clock runs down. it's the last quarter of the game and tensions are at an all time high. with less than 10 seconds left, iowa has the lead 71-69. it's way too close for comfort.

everyone's on edge. the announcers narrating the game for folks at home, coaches, benched teammates, the audience on either side of the court.

when uconn forces a turnover, you stand out of bounds waiting to pass the ball in. 1.1 on the clock. paige stands with her back to you. no one could've predicted your next move. 

you take advantage of her guard let down and quickly bounce the ball off of her, chopping the time in half as she fails to catch it in time and lets it out of bounds once again.

you feel a second of remorse once you catch the defeated look on her face. but you couldn't let the game slip out of your hands that easily. not without a fight.

less than one second on the clock, there's no way for uconn to win. caitlin passes the ball to gabbie who simply throws it high in the air to run down the clock.

the buzzer sounds as you and your teammates run into a group hug, screaming and cheering. you have a small celebration before going to the handshake line. as you pass and commend the uconn coaches and players, you allow your fingers to linger on paige's for a second longer than others.

when she meets your eyes there’s a look of hurt apparent in them, yours filled with guilt. you know how important that game was to her, to her entire collegiate career. but this game was also important to you, she had to know that.

------

your teammates insisted on celebrating at a nearby bar and restaurant, feeling high off the recent victory.

you were obviously down to go with them, but decided to take a little extra time in the locker room showers just to get some peace and quiet to yourself. you tell the girls that you'll catch up in your own car.

so now you're changing into a fresh set of clothes in a dim, empty locker room. some people might find the setting eerie but you enjoy the stillness of it all, especially after the day you've had. 

you’re wearing a basic white crop top and a muted purple skirt, a thick black leather jacket draped over your shoulders to protect yourself from the cold evening air. as you grab your backpack and make your way out to the gym’s parking lot, you spot a familiar figure wandering around aimlessly.

of fucking course i'm left here with her, you think.

you let out an irritated sigh as you continue to rub a small towel against your head to dry your hair.

the sound of your shoes against the pavement catches paige's attention and causes her to turn around. when she observes your relaxed, freshly showered figure, her chest tightens. whether it's from hatred or attraction, she doesn't know.

"hey," she yells to you, stalking over.

you look up to her direction and laugh, "you look like a lost puppy, bueckers."

"damn," she says, "first you decide to beat me and now you're insulting me and calling me by my last name? way to kick me when i'm down, y/n.”

you try not to display how flustered you feel when she says your name like that, “i didn't decide to beat you, i just did. deal with it."

"attitude much? i'm just tryna be civil, ma, no need for the hostility."

that fucking nickname.

"did you need something from me? i'm just tryna meet up with the team so spit it out."

"you heading to the bar?"

"yes," you say skeptically, "how the hell do you know that?"

"i'm heading there too, dumbass," she replies.

"what the hell are you talking about?"

"your team invited mine to hangout," of course they did, "is that a problem?"

"might be," you respond shortly, "so why are you here if the rest of your team is at the bar?"

"i could ask you the same question, l/n," she mocks the way you say her last name.

"i asked you first."

"eager to hear me talk i see." before you can reject the idea she interrupts you, “it’s okay, i know how much you love my voice."

she's not wrong, of course, but you would never admit it to her face. you ignore the question with a roll of your eyes.

"i took a longer shower than everyone else,” you shrug, “told 'em i'll just meet them there. your turn."

she laughs nervously before answering, “uh, i was supposed to get a ride from azzi but i guess she forgot," she says as she looks around the empty parking lot. now it's your turn to tease her.

"that's crazy," you laugh and shake your head, "your own friends don't even wanna be around you."

"man, shut up," she scoffs.

there's a beat of silence before you begin to walk to your car, getting the hint that the conversation was over.

you hear paige groan behind you before asking, "yo..do you think you could give me a ride?"

the nerve.

"excuse me?" you say incredulously as you unlock your car door and slip into the driver's seat. the blonde jogs up to your car, resting an arm on the frame of your door. you become hyper aware of how close you are, and how good she looks.

for the first time since you started talking to her, you take in her appearance. she's wearing a light blue cropped tank top, almost like a sports bra, and dark gray distressed jeans. there's a white uconn hoodie in her hands.

the amount of skin exposed makes your body heat up. the way her arms are flexed against your car makes you think back to the many times they've been flexed underneath your weight.

“can i. get. a ride.” she staggers out, like it’s painful to ask you for a favor. you take advantage of her position immediately.

“i dunno, can you?” you smirk.

“i fucking hate you, do you know that?”

“i dunno, do i?”

“dude.”

you throw your head forward in a laugh, shoulders shaking at her irritation.

“you’re so easy to piss off, i love it.”

“yeah well there’s a lot of other things about me that i know you love but we don’t have to talk about that.”

“do you want a ride or not?” you deadpan, “’cause if you’re gonna act like this all night i don’t want you at the bar, bro.”

“‘bro’? that’s what we’ve come to? that’s even worse than just bueckers, y/n.”

“just shut up and get in the car.”

“yes ma’am,” she says with a mock salute as she closes your door and jogs around the front of the car to the passenger seat.

as you turn on the engine, paige settles into the spot next to you and immediately reaches for the aux cord .

“um,” you pause, “what are you doing?”

“blessing you with my awesome music taste? what do you think i’m doing?”

“absolutely not,” you say, “my car, my rules.”

“um, no. the ‘rule’ is that the passenger chooses the playlist while the driver sets up the queue. we’ve been over this.”

“okay but,” you start carefully, “that was when we were together.”

silence.

“so do you want the ‘late night drives’ playlist or the ‘oldies but goodies’ playlist?”

“what?”

“you heard me.”

she brushes over your comment painfully fast. you had no idea why. you refuse to leave it at that.

“can you just put on our playlist?”

more silence. you gotta be kidding me.

“i don’t-“

“don’t even try, paige, i know you still have it.”

“but-“

“don’t fight me on this. all i want is to celebrate with my team and get a drink so can you please hurry up so we can go?”

“shit,” you hear her say under her breath, “yeah.” she pushes her hips forward as she gets comfortable in the seat.

your eyebrows furrow at the reaction. this girl is so fucking complicated. you weren’t sure if you wanted to curse her out or take her right there.

———

“y/n!! you made it!” jada squeals as you walk into the bar, “and…paige? wait. are you two back together??”

“hell no.”

“definitely not.”

you and paige turn to each other.

“oookayy..” jada trails as she pulls you away from the blonde in the direction of where your team was sat.

the girls cheer your name as you take a seat next to caitlin. you can tell they’ve already had at least 2 drinks each.

“hey,” caitlin says with a warm smile, “you got some catching up to do. let’s go get you a drink.”

she ushers you to the bar where you are able to sit and observe the environment. the venue is fairly dark, the ceiling lights dimmed to a warm hue with a few candles on each table. the stools at the bar were a cold metal that gave you goosebumps. all the table booths have dark brown leather couches one side and wooden chairs with intricate designs on the other.

“so,” caitlin starts after she’s ordered you a drink, lord knows what it was, “i saw you and paige walk in together. that mean anything?”

“please,” you scoff, “i’m done with her, cait, like seriously.” she stays silent, waiting for you to continue, “i mean, she’s so annoying and cocky and confusing, it’s exhausting - i hate her.”

“you sure about that?”

“yes.”

“then why do you still put up with her?”

“what do you mean?”

“i mean,” she says as the bartender delivers two of the same drink, one for you and one presumably for caitlin, “just stop talking to her. ignore her.”

you pause to think. “but she’s always the one starting these dumbass petty fights.”

“then don’t answer her?”

“i have to.”

“and why is that?” she eggs you on, sipping on her drink.

“because,” you sigh, “i can’t let her win.”

“or,” caitlin smirks as the two of you get up to head back to your table, “you still like being around her.”

“as if.”

“okay. tell me this then - why do you two still smile at each other like nothing has changed?”

“we almost never see them, cait.”

“no, i know but…i saw the way you looked at her today. and i saw the way you looked at her when we played them in sophomore year. you still like her, y/n.”

you two have returned to your seats with the rest of the team. you find yourself looking for a particular blonde (again) across the room. the uconn girls were sitting at a similar table to the one you were currently at, just on the other side of the bar.

to your relief, caitlin drops the conversation to engage in one with kate about the game. you quietly sip on your drink as you continue to stare at paige. she’s smiling - laughing - with azzi and aaliyah. you missed them. you missed her. you didn’t acknowledge it until now, until caitlin knocked some sense into you. you did enjoy being around her, mainly because it reminded you of how it was before you transferred to iowa. even though your conversations consist of constant jabs and insults, it was better than radio silence.

but you also hated it. you hated how you couldn’t be with her like you used to. you hated how you left. you hated how she treated you when you left. you hated how she acted like nothing happened. that’s why you have to win every time you’re up against her - literally and figuratively.

paige scored 4 three-pointers in a game? you score 5. paige got 6 rebounds? you got 7. paige had 8 assists? you had 9. it wasn’t just for yourself, it was for the media. with how they constantly have a magnifying glass on your life, you can’t jeopardize your career. so you have to be better than her.

your jaw clenches at the thought of the pressure, the expectation. you down the rest of your way too light cocktail and make your way back to the bar for a stronger drink.

“hey,” you say to the bartender, “can i get a sex on the beach, please?” he nods with a polite smile as he walks away to make your order.

“still rockin with those?” you hear an all-too-familiar voice say.

“if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it,” you mutter, not bothering to turn to her.

she scoffs. what is her problem now? you think.

“you’re so damn predictable,” she laughs, “it’s hilarious.”

“at least i’m reliable,” you retort, “when’s the last time you had any stability in your life?”

“when i was with you,” she says immediately.

that makes you turn your head. you are greeted with paige’s cold eyes and an unreadable expression.

“what are you doing, paige? what are we doing?” you sound exhausted.

“you tell me. i never got a good explanation when you…left.”

“i tried. you wouldn’t let me. didn’t think you wanted to hear from me after our last conversation.”

“don’t pin this on me,” she says pointedly, “you left me.”

“i didn’t have a choice, paige, you have to understand that.”

“but did you have to leave me? you know we could’ve worked it out.”

“could we have?”

she sighs. the conversation has elevated quickly. you didn’t expect her to open up like this now, to bring all of this up now. maybe it was the ambient atmosphere or the influential alcohol, or both. the man behind the bar sets your drink down on a small napkin in front of you, but you decide against going back to your table.

“so…” she says quietly, “have you been seeing anyone? i know how the fans like to twist shit, but is any of it true?”

“wouldn’t you like to know,” you laugh.

“hey, i’m just tryna gauge where you’re at right now. scope out the competition, you know how it is.”

“‘scope out the competition’?”

she shrugs.

“have you been seeing anyone?” “have you heard that i’m seeing anyone?”

god, this girl could not give a simple answer to save her life. but two can play that game.

“maybe i have. maybe i haven’t. and maybe i’ve seen you with a certain husky named azzi?” you have no clue where you got this idea knowing damn well that they’re nothing more than friends.

“and what if i am? you jealous, ma?” they’re nothing more than friends…right?

“hilarious.”

“that’s not a no.”

“no, it’s not..” you mumble under your breath, turning away from her to avoid her burning stare.

“good.” what the hell is this girl getting at? her avoidant yet suggestive responses set something off in you. “you never answered my question.”

“i am with someone,” you lie through your teeth, wanting to get a reaction out of her.

her breath hitches, “who?” her tone is targeted with a hint of…anger?

“why do you care? you’re with azzi right?”

“i never said that.”

“but you didn’t deny it,” you point out, using her own tactics.

“i am now. i’m not with her. so who are you with?”

“i don’t need to tell you anything.”

“so you’re not with anyone?” she laughs. this girl.

“i am.”

“then tell me.”

“no.”

“fine. be like that,” and suddenly she’s pulling you up from the barstool and into a poorly-lit hallway.

“where are we going?” you demand as you two turn a corner, the only light is the distant hue from the main part of the bar.

“we need to talk about this.”

“talk about what?”

“this,” she motions between the two of you as she pushes you against a wall, one strong arm preventing you from leaving.

“there’s nothing to talk about.”

“i’m not gonna let you keep dodging this, y/n. you left me to go to whole different state with no explanation whatsoever.”

“because you ghosted me first! what was i supposed to do?”

“we were supposed to work it out. remember? when we were teammates on and off the court?”

“you shut me out.”

“because, y/n,” she sighs deeply, “i knew i couldn’t handle it if i had to say goodbye to you. i would’ve-“ she stops herself.

“you would’ve what?”

after about 10 seconds of silence, she whispers, “i would’ve begged you not to go - not to leave me.”

your eyes shoot to hers, but she’s looking down at the floor. her head is almost resting against yours as you observe her adamant yet vulnerable state. you’ve never seen her like this.

from what you’ve seen online, paige seemed to have the time of her life after you transferred. you assumed that she moved on so easily, so quickly. you didn’t consider that it was all just a front.

“paige,”

“what?” she barely gets out, still avoiding your eyes.

“look at me,” she doesn’t, “please.”

her head flies up at that, “what?” she repeats.

you don’t know what to say, you just needed to see her - really see her. her eyes are filled with such clear emotion yet you can’t put your finger on what she was feeling. from her body language you can tell that she misses you. and as you realize you subconsciously put your own hand on her waist, you body is telling you that you miss her too. 

you contemplate your next move for a second, questioning if all of this is worth it. but she’s worth it. in the time you’ve spent apart from her, you grew and matured. you also realize that you need her like you need oxygen. you come to the conclusion that you always have, but it took distance and space to accept it.

not wanting to get too in your head, you smash your lips onto hers as your shoulders instantly relax. you feel paige pause but eventually melt into the kiss, moving her hands up to the nape of your neck. you bring your other hand up to her wrist, resting it there as you relish in the feeling of her lips finally against yours after almost two years. you guide her hand down to your thigh as you move to grasp her shoulders. she glides over your upper thing, riding up your lilac skirt.

she breaks the kiss for a moment, “i’ve always loved you in purple.”

before she can resume the heated kiss, you push against her and observe your surroundings. to your left is the open area you just came from, all your friends oblivious to your activities. all the way down to your right is a door leading out to the back lot and a closer door - presumably a supply closet.

you weigh out your options: do you want to stop the interaction completely, drag her into your car all the way outside, or simply shove her into the closet and have your way with her?

smirking up at her, you pull her into the closet as she laughs at your desperation but follows you nonetheless. 

yes, there were still broken pieces in your relationship. yes, you have always claimed to hate each other. but no, you weren’t leaving without her, even if you had to use handcuffs.

she was never not yours, and you were never not hers.

#leilanihours #paige bueckers #paige buckets #paige bueckers x reader #paige bueckers fluff #paige bueckers smut #uconn #university of iowa #wbb #ncaa #ncaaw #wnba #march madness #taylor swift #imgonnagetyouback #ttpd #tortured poets #the tortured poets department #wlw #writing #Spotify

[aerinaga]

what a flirt pt. 3

paige bueckers x reader

warnings: making out

note: hey guyysss 🫶🏻 let me know if you want more

🌺 part 2

PAIGE’S POV

i genuinely just froze. what the hell was she doing here? i thought i’d never see her again.

even if she looked so laid back, i can tell that her personality from the other night is still the same. and even hotter. what’s wrong with me?

“hey. maybe you’re the one that misses me?”

YOUR POV

you smirked at her comment, she’s being indenial huh?

paige quickly told her friends that she would go ahead, wanting to spend time with you. you couldn’t reject her offer, you texted gigi about what was happening.

the both of you quickly left, paige was taking you somewhere.

you arrived at her dorm.

you weren’t thinking about what was going to happen, you decided that things will just go with the flow. i mean, what worse could happen?

paige leads you to her room, her bedsheets in a purple hue, tons of shoe boxes, and clothes.

“sorry my rooms kinda messy, i wasn’t expecting anyone today.”

“no it’s fine really, my room is just the same”

the both of you laugh at your comment. the moment died down quickly, creating a silence between you both. it wasn’t even the normal kind of silence, it was more like sexual tension between the both of you.

the both of you stared at one another,

everything just happened so quickly.

your back against paiges mirrored closet, as the both of you make out on each others lips.

paige bit on your lip, wanting entrance to your mouth. you let her tongue in, getting a taste of you. you moaned, paiges grip getting tighter on your waist.

you kissed her down her jaw, to her neck, nibbling and licking on her skin. it was so sweet and delicate, you wanted more. you heard her breaths getting deeper, you knew it was a good way to make her feel weak.

you got down to her collarbone, stretching out the neckline of her top. none of you cared at this point, everything was just so hot. you sucked on the skin of her right collarbone, eliciting a raspy moan from her. you kissed the mark on her collarbone, leaving more love bites on both collarbones.

her hands went to your hips, and eventually to your ass. she squeezed it with so much strength. it hurt slightly, but it felt so good. your back arched, small moans coming out of your mouth.

the both of you let go, paiges hands on your hips. heavy breaths were heard around the room.

“hearing you like that felt good, ma.”

you blush at her comment, hitting her chest. she laughs, finding you cute.

it was time for you to leave. paige led you out, feeling a bit disappointed but she knew this wouldn’t be the last time she would see you.

“hey b, here’s my number. just text me, yeah? i’ll give you more next time if you do well in basketball.” you say, winking at her before coming up to kiss her cheek before leaving go to gigi’s dorm.

#paige bueckers x reader #paige bueckers #uconn wbb

[jadeee]

Scaling Walls

Kento proposed before leaving for war. He said he'd be away for six months, but it's been a year.

— Author's Note — There's an alternate ending.

4.3k ⁎ depression, anxiety attacks, mentions of war @luneariaa @raevennsge @everything-minni

The Mad Maiden. It was an insult. Salt in the wound. A disgrace. Betrayal, disrepect, dishonor... but.. were they wrong?

You gazed out over the ledge and into the fog of the September sky. The air turned cold, yet it couldn't compare to the chill that seeped into your spine months ago. He wasn't one to make promises, so he desparately fought your attempts to extract an exact date from him. However, he stated that six months was the minimum for his departure. 

You're only a woman. You can't stop war. 

You remember how your throat tensed at the sound of him saying how long he'd be gone. 180 days, which was half a year without being next to him. Hearing his voice or holding his hand. Seeing him smile at your quips. Making you laugh with some ludicrous comment. How the corner of his lip would turn upward when he'd lean in during functions to whisper something the tabloids would have a field day with. It was nearly summer when he'd left. The world completed it's annual rotation around the sun without your lover's return. It was now fall... Your eyes watered. Your heart ached. Stomach churning at the, unfortunately, familiar abscence of his prescence.

"Princess..." the voice of your lady in waiting, Belinda, called from behind you. "Princess, please step back from the ledge."

 You glanced at her over your shoulder, "Don't insult me."

Her chest rose until it seemed her dress would burst. "I was only... I... forgive me."

Your nostrils flared slightly as you faced forward.

"Please... come inside. There's a chill and you've left your coat."

"Have you forgotten you're my help, not my mother?" you bit your tongue as you gazed out at the forest beyond. Your hands gripped the rail. The metal from your ring pressing into your flesh. The diamond still shined despite the beginning of the dull fall weather.

"... Leave."

The woman knelt, then turned to leave as requested. The breeze blew through the sheer fabric of your dress, which started to slip from your shoulders much like the others. Goosebumps pricked your skin but you felt nothing.

April 21st, 1905

"Hello, nice to meet you." your hand shook that of other royals. The room filled with onlookers who waited for this very moment. Your staff had taken special care of mending the wrinkles of your dress that morning. Tucking and pinning your hair this way and that. Adjusting diamonds until they shined ever so brightly, then polishing the ring. You twisted it round your finger as you walked toward the podium. It'd been nine months and he hadn't sent so much as a piece of string. 

The first few months were filled with letters, exchanging of small mementos and keepsakes.

Should we have a spring wedding? It could symbolize our new chapter as a married couple. What about colors? Should we have a traditional royal wedding? Oh God, the thought... Please help me decide... there's still the dress. Oh! Where should we honeymoon? 

All my love, 

An indecisive bride

You rested your hand at your side, then lifted your dress as the official helped you up to the platform. Maybe it was the tiny twists of flowers in the nearby vase that reminded you of his handwriting. The black ink from his last letter seemed to imprint itself in the walls of your mind.

I'm afraid things are not progressing as we would've hoped...yet, I'm eager to return to you, my beautiful wife. Yes, I know we're still engaged but it's true in my heart. You take up a lot of space there. As for the details, I'd much prefer to elope. Wouldn't you? I don't care for the details, as long as we're together. Although, if something isn't to your liking, do tell me so I can take care of it.

To my everything,

Kento

P.S.: I'd like to honeymoon somewhere warm and tropical.

A warm smile resided on your face as you stared at your hands. That was four months ago, during Christmas. Which you'd spent alone for the first time. Tears stung at your eyes, then someone in the crowd cleared their throat. You lifted your eyes to the crowd. As if you suddenly realized you were being watched and waited on. You held your head high, ensuring the crown wouldn't slip.

"Thank you to the King and Queen for my being here. I would be remiss if I didn't —"

Your eyes landed on a man who wore badges you easily recognized, since Nanami had the same ones. You recall making him explain each one to you during one of the late nights you often spent together. It'd been a year. 365 days and then some. The papers were no longer covering the war, yet cameras were pointed at you while you were here to discuss... what? Nationality? Pride? Being faithful to King, God, and country? Your throat tensed, chest rising and falling every few seconds. "I can't began without —" 

You shifted your stance as you looked out at the crowd. Their faces slowly morphing into various shades of skin tones and colors instead of distinguished features. "I— I'm sorry." your breath quickened as you stepped away from the microphone emitting murmurs from the crowd.

"I can't." you faced your guard who stood by your side still as stone. His eyes, however, studied you with soft concern. As he offered you his hand, you pushed it away and ran past him to a corridor. He followed you without hesitation. The murmurs morphed into a low buzz, a steady hum of Did you see that? I think she was going to cry. It's her fiancé. Does anyone know what happened? Shame to be a widow before the wedding. Who'll design the dress?

The often hardened eyes, melted at the sight of you on the floor of the empty hall. The chiffon of your dress pooled at your bare feet, shoes cast aside, crown lying sideways by your legs which were tight against your chest. His salt and pepper brows twitched while he fought to maintain his neutral facial expression, as he was taught when he first began.

You sobbed into your hands, "He's dead isn't he? And no one wants to tell me because they pity me. He's been blown to bits or tossed aside in a ditch!"

Vincent knelt down to your level and spoke your name softly, breaking every single rule. You drew your hands down slightly then looked into his eyes. The silence seeped in, until it nestled itself into your belly. A rock hardening in the pit of your stomach, ready to savor and swallow every single fear you had.

"... no" you uttered and shook your head "no, he..." you tilted your head to the side "please..."

"I don't know if he is, but... I need to get you back to the palace. We need to get you away from you here."

Your carefully painted lips formed a frown. The skin of your chin wrinkling at the very act. Another round of your sobs echoed throughout the hallway and the buzzing seemed to grow closer. "Princess, we have to leave."

People shouted your name from the other side of the door. "Have you heard from the Prince? Is he still off at war?! Did he leave you? Will there still be a wedding?!" 

Your heart sank into the pit where it would be devoured. The doors rattled, beating like the drum of an ancient song.

"Get back! Immediately!" a group of guards shouted amid the commotion. You glanced over at the oak doors. Maybe being trampled on would be better. You wouldn't know since Vincent scooped you up in his arms, then carried you to the exit behind the building away from prying eyes.

The next few months were filled with silence in every single form and shape. Silence from your mouth, save the typical "I'm not hungry" or "I'm not going." Silence in the halls, since you hardly left your room the staff didn't have to work as much. So they stood, waiting for you to come back to life. Yet, you slowly hardened each day into stubborn stone, residing in sadness.

Your staff didn't bother to ask for permission to enter anymore since you stopped speaking except when necessary. They only knocked to make you aware then opened the door timidly to do whatever they had set out. This time, it was a carefully prepared bowl of your favorite fruits. Belinda held it in her hands as she studied how your garment began to slip from your shoulders.

"Princess, the doctor says you need to eat." 

"Unless he's feeding me by force, I won't do it."

Belinda sighed then nodded "Yes, Princess." she set the plate of fruit down at the foot of your bed before leaving.

Once the door shut, your eyes landed on the bowl. The faint sweet scent caused you to make  your way over to the bowl of little delicacies. Your fingers touched at the cold produce then wrapped around them, lifting it to your mouth. Was he eating? Tears filled your eyes and you pushed the bowl away.

June 2nd, 1905

Nanami ran his hand through his hair. He needed a haircut but that was the least of his worries. Maybe you'd like him with longer hair... His fingers rubbed at the nape of his neck. Eyes landing on the stack of letters he kept by his bedside, if you'd even call it that. He'd started to leave the letters out of the envelope for quicker access. Carefully tying the bundle after reading them each night. The favorites were at the top — although, they were all his favorite. He made sure to keep certain things hidden however. Like the locket you gave him with your picture before he departed.

Another little thing he'd done was tie twine around his ring finger, at your behest. In one of your letters, which he keeps at the top of the stack, you mention it being his temporary ring until you two get the real one. Silver. I want silver for us. Gold is overrated. Nanami recalled how you chuckled at his statement, when he confessed his personal preference one morning. 

"Should I have the frames re-done then?"

"Absolutely, the palace walls are hideous." 

He grinned, breaking character, then pulled you closer to him to kiss your forehead.

He could feel it against his lips now. His fingers absentmindedly reached for the locket he wore under his shirt, only to feel the impression over his heart. A sigh left his lungs as he replayed images of you in his mind. Had you picked a dress already? It'd been a year...

The entrance of his tent flung open, "General." the soldier stood at ease awaiting for his approval and recognition.

Nanami nodded, too tired for formalities "Yes?"

"I thought you should see this, sir. We received our batch of newspapers. It's late but... it's important." he handed him a faded newspaper with a headline that read "Mad Maiden" dated April 22nd, 1905. He rose to his feet when he read about you foresaking the podium and sobbing in a hallway.

"That is all."

"Sir..."

He glanced up at the man "That. Is all."

He saluted to his higher up then retreated. A whirlwind of emotions ran through him: concern, fear, disgust at whoever concocted this filth... but namely, longing. How much longer? Recent devlopments made it impossible to write to you. The locket fell from its typical spot as he exhaled.

"Have you come to feed me?" you chuckled at Dr. Percival who stood in your room. He'd been your doctor since you were a child so you weren't accustomed to the usual formalities.

"Yes." he answered plainly.

You glanced at him then scoffed.

"... If you don't eat, I'll need to take other measures and I don't want to do that."

"... you wouldn't."

He looked into your eyes then pressed his lips together. His hand reached for the plate of food Belinda left in your room minutes ago, "Just try."

You took the plate in your hands along with the fork and bite into it. After a few chews, you spoke again "Have dinner with me."

"Okay."

It was the first time in months, you'd come downstairs for dinner. The staff didn't set the table as usual, per your request; so, you sat side by side with Dr. Percival. Your shared chews filled every nook and cranny of the room. 

The doctor noticed how you wiggled in your seat. "Have you seen the leaves change?"

"From the balcony. Yes."

He studied you, "How often do you go to the balcony?"

You cut your eyes at him. He didn't move an inch.

"Why do you still wear it?"

Your fingers danced at the mention of the jewel that'd been residing there for a year.

"If you believe he's dead, why wear it still? He won't come back if he is."

Twelve hours was a new record. The longest you'd went without crying. Sleep didn't count because you didn't do that much. Tears welled in your eyes as you gazed at the diamond.

The doctor set down his fork as he looked at you. Your shoulders started to shake as you sobbed. He rose to his feet then embraced you. Everything you'd felt over the past year bubbled up and spilled over as you sobbed against him. Within seconds, your breath became bated and ragged. Your sobs were short, choked sounds "I c—" you clutched at your chest.

He glanced down at you "Princess?" his ears burned at the sound of you gasping for air. He called you by your name and clutched your shoulders "Look at me! Look at me!" his hands rested on your cheeks as he made you look into his face. Your eyes were filled with tears as you continued to gasp. 

"Belinda! Vincent!" they rushed to your side and followed his orders to calm you down. He held onto your hand as he made you lie on the ground. "I need you to breathe, look at me!"

That night was the first time you didn't sleep alone. The doctor along with Vincent and Belinda stood nearby as you lie in bed. Their frames looked like shadows or watchdogs. Something ancient guarding a secret. Except were they protecting you from the evils of the world? Or was it the other way around?

October 15th, 1905

Your court and staff had worked hard to get you where you were now. Your chambers were still a mess but you were eating three meals a day, sometimes reluctantly, and moving around a bit more. You didn't deem walks around the halls as exercise but Dr. Percival differed. 

"Maybe we can go out to the courtyar—"

"No."

He walked down the carpeted hallway with you "Very well."

Your eyes landed on the silver frames lining the wall. "Can I rest after this?"

"Yes, of course. Will you be going to the—"

You cut your eyes at him.

"Very well, then."

The sun peered through your curtains, despite them being drawn.Your hand slammed against the comforter at Mother Nature's reluctance to let you have your way. Your eyes followed the ray of sunshine, hand drifting up to catch the light and harness it somehow. The diamond twinkled under it and the corner of your lip twitched as you felt the tug on your heartstrings.

Mornings now typically started with the doctor talking you out of bed and doing a few stretches. Yet, this morning you simply said "Leave me... please." he obliged sensing your sadness. The mahogany doors shut with a soft thud, leaving you and the sun illuminating your room. Dust motes floated through and landed onto the pile of dresses stacked in the chair. Papers and notes about the war Nanami had been away fighting... or so you hoped. You stood to your feet then looked out the window.

A knock at the door interrupted your thoughts.

"I said leave me."

"There's someone here to see you." Belinda stated.

"I'm not taking visitors. You know—" you turned at the sound of the door opening. Suddenly, time had stopped. You stopped. Breathing, blinking, thinking... being. After a moment of silence, you shook your head.

"No... hm-hmph" tears quickly found their way to your eyes. "No." you shook your finger and stepped back until you hit your dresser. "How..." your breath hitched but your eyes never left him. His hair was longer... why didn't he cut it? The medals on his uniform were polished. Anyone on the street would see him as pristine but when you looked into his eyes. You felt the ache, the yearning, the tears he cried while he was away.

"I.. you.." you breath quickened as you tried not to cry.

"I know," he reached out to you and you found yourself recoiling. Nanami shrunk back, his hands idly resting by his side unsure of what to do. Hurt filled his hazel eyes as he gazed at you, tilting his head and furrowing his brows.

"Don't touch me."

He'd fought in combat, shot and been shot at but nothing could have prepared him for this.

"Guards!"

"Darling, I—"

"You're not real. You're a figment of my imagination because," you wiped the snot that was dripping from your nose "because I- I want you to be real and here, but—"

"I am. I'm right here!" he started to resist the guards that boxed him in.

"I saw you die! I dreamt about it every night!" you shouted in a broken voice then started to cry. Belinda caught onto the sound and rushed for the doctor.

Within moments, you fell to the floor, clutching at your chest. "Wh-what's happening?" Nanami attempted to run to your side but your guards pulled him back. He shoved then stepped forward only to be pulled back again. Luckily, Vincent, Dr. Percival and Belinda came running in. Vincent instructed the guards to ease up then Nanami stepped forward as you started to gasp for air.

"No, no, no," you shook your head as you proceeded to sob and heave. The guards moved forward to collect Nanami once again. Vincent watched while Belinda uttered a prayer. Dr. Percival shouted "Stop!" Nanami glanced back at him then watched as he approached you. Dr. Percival knelt down "He's real. I promise you," he leaned in until you could see his face "He. is. real."

Nanami watched you with a steady eye. Never moving or saying anything, just standing in wait for your permission. The locket thumped against his heart.

"Please... let him in. Hm?" 

Your sobs died down to quick breaths as your eyes focused on the carpet beneath your hands. Then there was the ring, staring back at you through your tears. You started up again and Nanami moved closer then knelt down and wrapped his arms around you. Your face pressed against his shoulders, chest against his, muscles tensing at the sudden movement. His scent invading your nostrils until he was all you could breathe in. Your breath hitched in your throat and tears filled your vision again. The room was silent in that moment. All of the staff filling the space of the room as they watched the long awaited reunion. Nanami oblivious to whomever was watching, softly uttering "I'm here now. I'm sorry I took so long." as he caressed your back.

You held your breath, only sufficing small inhales until you felt like you would burst. Your arms hovered over his back, wavering, shaking. The familiar scent of wood and citrus wrapping itself around you like the very hug he was giving you now made the silence impossible. You embraced him tightly with all the force you could muster. He chuckled through the tears he was shedding against your nightgown.

Vincent looked at the guards then nodded, signaling for them to leave. He trailed behind the doctor and Belinda, leaving you two alone. The room was a medley of shared sobs. When he pulled back, he smiled through his tears at the sight of his beautiful bride. Even with tears running down your cheeks and a runny nose, you were still beautiful. His hands rested on your cheeks and you instinctively put your hands over his. The corner of your lips twisted as you did so.

"What is it?" his thumb brushed the tears from your cheek.

"You... you're wearing it." you touched the twine around his finger.

"Of course I'm wearing it. You're my wife."

Tears filled your eyes once more and you sobbed, wrapping your hands around him. Kento held you close. He'd never been more grateful for such a moment as this. His lips placed a kiss at the top of your head.

"You're my wife," he repeated softly.

— Alternate Ending —

Later that afternoon, Nanami walked with you along the garden. He wanted to say so much but he didn't know where to start. His hands remained at his side as he put one foot in front of the other.

"I asked the kitchen to make your favorite tonight."

"Really?"

He nodded "I also asked that they make dessert. I hope that's okay."

"Of course it is." you chuckled at his humbleness.

"I apologize for making you worry. There was an incident and ... we couldn't communicate with anyone. It became too dangerous." he took your hand in his. You held it for a moment "You're here now." you pulled your hand back and offered him a small smile.

He leaned back slightly then followed your sight of line to the sunset. His lips opened then shut and he joined you in the silence instead.

The staff relished at the joy you seemed to radiate during dinner. Your laughter and voice was music to their ears. Joy was one of their favorite songs to hear in the halls and they truly owed it to his return. He was happy to see you in such high spirits, however they were dashed when it was time for bed. You shifted for a few moments as he lie next to you.

"It's... it's been a while."

His heart went dull at the reminder "... I know. Should I remain on my side?"

Your silence put him at further unease "I'll stay here. Don't worry."

You rested your head against the pillows.

"Darling?"

"Yes?" you glanced at him.

"Can we hold hands? Only for a moment."

Silence, then a nod. Nanami felt his heart race at the pure prospect of hand holding. He'd felt giddy. He was delighted. His hand slid into yours and he looked up at the ceiling. He brought it to his chest then you pulled back.

"I'm sorry...."

Hurt filled his eyes once again. "It's quite alright. I can sleep in the guest room."

"What?! No. You've just returned from battle. Stay. I'll go to the guest room." you kicked the covers off and he scoffed.

"Don't be ridiculous, the Princess should stay in her chambers. I'll leave." Nanami got out of bed then headed for the door.

"No."

He glanced back at you then shifted his stance to face you fully. "What do you suppose we do then? Since you won't even touch me. It seems you can't stand me now."

"I never said that!"

"You don't have to."

You leaned back at the verbal slap. "Nanami..."

"Just tell me what you want and I'll do it." he approached you "I swear, I'll do everything in my power to make it happen."

Your eyes started to fill with tears again as you gazed into his "I wish you never left."

He pressed his lips together slightly, still gazing into your eyes "I can't change what happened."

"... I know."

You broke your gaze for a second to wipe your face "They called me mad," you let out a half-hearted chuckle "The Mad Maiden."

"Don't say that. Whoever wrote that is a dimwit with nothing better to do."

".... so you've read about it?"

"... yes."

Silence until "I canceled my appointment with the wedding dress designer. We had a meeting scheduled a few months after you were supposed to return in the fall of 1904. When you stopped writing, I..." tears welled in your eyes and you shook your head then shrugged.

He reached out to you then drew back, remembering how you could barely hold his hand.

"... do you still love me?"

You turned to face him.

"Do you?"

"How dare you ask me that?" you shook your head and he stared right into your soul "I shed myself for months, withering away until I barely recognized myself. I waited nearly two years for you to return. I convinced myself that there would be no wedding, There'd be no honeymoon or kids skipping down the halls because you were gone. I dreamt about burying an empty box and I still kept this ring on my hand because I couldn't bear the thought of aching so terribly for anyone else." tears fell from your eyes "I ached... every single day."

His eye never left yours and they filled to the brim with tears at your words.

"Don't you ever ask me that again."

He continued to stare into your eyes then leaned forward and pressed his lips against yours. A surprised squeal left your lips, before those moans he missed took over. His hands found their way to your back and your head which he cradled. With each second you melted into him and against him, he moved closer.

"Can I—"

"Yes." you pulled him down toward you and he briefly smiled against your skin. His hands intertwined with yours but the feeling of twine gave you pause.

"What? What is it?"

"You... you're wearing it." you touched the twine around his finger.

"Of course I'm wearing it. You're my wife."

— Author's Note — I really enjoyed writing this one. Originally, I had a scene where the doctor actually resorts to opium to calm down the princess but that felt too hardcore.

#dividers by plutism and inklore #madebyjade #kento nanami #nanami kento #jjk nanami #nanami x reader #jujutsu nanami #jjk x reader #jjk #jjk au #jujutsu kaisen #jjk kento #kento x reader #kento x y/n #jujutsu kaisen nanami #nanami kento angst #nanami fluff #nanami headcanons #nanami kento x reader #nanami kento headcanons #jjk x you #jjk x y/n #jjk angst #jujustsu kaisen x reader #jujustu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen x reader #nanami kento au #jjk nanami kento x reader #jjk nanami au

[sapphic-coded]

Loose Ends

With her target dead, all Yelena needs to do is clean up a loose end. You. Except she can't pull the trigger. But she can't let you go. That leaves only one option.

Yelena Belova x fem Reader

Warnings: Violence. Some gore. Mention of past non-consensual relationship. Smut ( bdsm, dom/sub relationship, punishments, impact play, restraints, light degradation but it's there, edging, collars ). Minors DNI. This was written for a mature audience. Please do not repost my work. Reblog, like, and/or comments is how you can show your support.

Word Count: 3k

Author's Note: This started out as a writing exercise and it turned into this. It was too much fun to not share. I can see this being a short series. Let me know what you guys think. Do you want more Yelena?

Chapter One: The Brat Tamer

You put up a good fight. The two goons that obey Watson’s every command drag you down the hallway. With every breath you take, you try to get away. You try to pull yourself from their grasp. You try digging your feet into the hardwood floors. You try everything you can think of to either wear them down or slip free. But all your efforts do nothing as they reach the door to Watson’s study. The door opens, and you are pushed into the room. 

You stumble into Watson’s study, and you just barely manage to stop yourself from falling face first onto the floor. You hear the door shut behind you. You want to turn around and yank the door back open. You want to run out of Watson’s study and just keep running until all of this is far behind you. But you already tried that. Multiple times. It never works. You run and run and run…and you end up back here. 

“Ah, Y/N,” Watson’s familiar voice claims your attention. He is sitting behind his large mahogany desk in his favorite dark brown armchair. He is dressed in his usual navy blue business suit with a tumbler glass of whiskey in his hand. “You made it.” The smile that cuts across his face is cold and hollow. “I want you to meet someone.” He gestures with his hand to the woman sitting across from him.

The first thing you notice is her hair. Her long blonde hair is held away from her face in a large intricate braid. Only a couple blonde strands fall free to frame her face as she turns in her seat to look at you. She wears a long green trench coat that is held closed by the wrap that is knotted across her stomach. Black fingerless gloves cover her hands while black tactical looking boots cover her feet. But it’s her eyes that steal your attention completely. The woman’s hazel eyes are playful, but there is something else that lurks behind it. You feel as though you are standing before a predator. But not the kind like Watson. Not vile and disgusting. She’s different. 

“This is Yelena,” Watson says. 

She offers you a smile and tilts her head slightly as her eyes drink in the sight of you. 

“She is here at my request,” Watson continues. 

You can feel her stare as if they were her fingers raking over your skin. Just minutes ago, you hadn’t cared how you looked. You were content to look as messy and unpresentable to Watson as possible. You hated his touch, and you did whatever you could to keep him away from you. It wasn’t a foolproof plan. When he wanted you he would have his way with you. But his displeasure was always palpable, and you found solace in that. 

But now you feel like a dirty, mangy animal under her stare. You are suddenly self conscious of all your flaws. Your grass stained sweats and your worn band t-shirt feel wrong to wear. You nervously pick at the hem of your shirt.

“Y/N!” Watson’s raises his voice and your attention is dragged away from Yelena. You can still feel her looking at you. Watson’s hollow smile is gone. “Say hello.” 

Your attention quickly returns to Yelena. Her hazel eyes meet yours. “Hi.” You feel proud that your voice doesn’t betray how you really feel. Your voice comes out calm and even slightly disinterested. 

Watson shakes his head and looks across his desk to Yelena. “As I explained, she is challenging.”

“It is nothing I can’t handle,” Yelena says. The woman’s Russian accent laces through her words as she keeps her focus on you despite responding to Watson. 

“Threesome’s aren’t really my thing,” you say to Watson. You watch as he takes a long sip of his drink. Your words are meaningless to him. He has already done so much to you that you hated. He’s already heard you begging him to stop. He never does. 

He sets his drink down on his desk. “Even if it was, you do not deserve any pleasure. I spent three days chasing you down after your latest stunt. Do you know how much money I spent to make sure you got back here safely?”

You shrug. “I don’t know. A thousand dollars? Whatever it was, it sounds like a big waste of money to me.”

“You should be grateful,” he says. 

“I will be dead before that ever happens,” you reply. “Can I go now?” 

“No.”

It is Yelena that answers you. Your gaze shifts to the woman, and you notice that her smile is gone. 

“Yelena is here to correct your behavior,” Watson explains. 

You are still processing Watson’s words when Yelena stands up and moves towards you. You instinctively step back, but Yelena closes the space between the two of you. You can smell the jasmine and cedarwood scent of her perfume as she moves in a slow circle around you. You hear her come to a stop behind you. You are tempted to turn your head to look at her, but Watson’s movement steals your attention. 

He rises from his chair and collects his glass of whiskey. “She has my permission to do whatever her work requires.” He moves away from his desk and closer to you. “And if you drive her away–”

“She won’t,” Yelena cuts in before Watson can finish his threat. You feel her finger slowly glide across your back between your two shoulder blades. You shift your weight from one foot to the other. The smell of her perfume is beginning to be all you smell, and you don’t want that to stop. “I am very good at taming brats.” 

Watson’s smile makes you want to turn and run, but Yelena’s hand grabs the back of your collar. You stumble for a moment as the action jerks you back half a step. You can feel the softness of her coat brush against your back as something cuts apart the collar. Before you can think to ask, the dark blue, rough, scratchy collar is removed. The brush of cool air against the newly exposed skin around your neck feels strange. 

Yelena holds the collar out towards Watson. The collar’s fabric has been cut through and looks pathetic and sad in Watson’s hand. “Take that. She must earn it back.” You aren’t eager to earn it back, but a warmth pools in your gut. Watson walks by you, and you listen to the sound of his retreating footsteps. You can still feel Yelena at your back as you hear the door to Watson’s study open and then close. 

“Your Master has told me so much about you,” she says once you two are finally alone. You feel her press her finger into the nape of your neck. “He told me how he acquired you.” Her finger slowly traces down the back of your neck. The feeling of her skin pressed against yours is like lightning, and the warmth taking root within you becomes more pronounced. “It is obviously the root of your misbehavior. We will address it. I will make you his obedient slut.” 

“I’m not his–” 

You are about to turn around to face her, but her finger disappears from the back of your neck. Her fingers curl into your hair, and she grabs a fistful of it. Without warning, she pulls you back until your entire back is pressed against her front. Her lips come to rest next to your ear. 

“You will not speak unless I give you permission. Do you understand?” 

Your hands come up in a pathetic attempt to free yourself from her hold. Yelena’s free hand effortlessly smacks your hands away and gives another swift yank on your hair. Your eyes squeeze shut against the pain, and you think you can hear her smiling as her breath tickles your ear. 

“Yes,” you finally say.

She doesn’t let go. “You will address me as Domina.”

“Yes, Domina,” you quickly reply. 

She lets go of your hair, and you take a breath at the receding pain. Domina. You’ve never had a Domina before. Always a Master. There’s a ring to the title that you like. You like the way it feels in your mouth when you say it. Unlike Watson’s title. You want to gag every time he forces the title out of you. 

“Your Master gives you too many privileges,” Yelena says as she takes a small step away from you. The feeling of her body against yours disappears, and you don’t like that at all. You miss it. And you hate how she keeps dragging your Master back to the forefront of your mind. You don’t want to think about him. You just want to think about her. You don’t know what she’s going to do to you, and it sends a thrill through you. 

“He lets you speak when you have not earned it,” she continues. “He lets you hit him when you do not listen. I am revoking these privileges. Put your hands behind your back.” 

You bring your hands back, and you feel her hand grab hold of yours. She secures a pair of handcuffs around your wrists. Once the cuffs are locked, she lets go and you hear her take a step back. The same feeling from before returns. You want her to keep touching you. You don’t want her to stop. 

“Kneel,” she orders. 

“Does this have to happen here?” you ask. You hear her moving slightly behind you and you start to turn your head to look at her. “There are at least six bedrooms we could–”

You don’t see her pull out the baton. In fact, you aren’t even aware of its existence within this room until she hits it against the back of your knees. A sharp cry is ripped from your lips as you fall immediately to your knees. The pain stings as she slowly walks around and stands in front of you. You stare at her black tactical boots until the tip of her black baton comes to rest beneath your chin. She tilts your head up. 

“Your antics will not work on me,” she says. “All they will do is earn you more punishments.” She removes her baton from beneath your chin. “Open your mouth.” 

You keep your lips shut and look away from her. A moment later her hand grabs your face and forces you to look up at her again. 

“You will not win this, Y/N.” Yelena’s fingers press into your cheeks and squeeze. You try to keep your mouth shut for as long as possible, but she soon manages to pry your mouth open. She brings her baton back up, but instead of bringing it down against you again, she positions it horizontally and shoves it into your open mouth. The grip she has on your mouth loosens as your mouth slowly closes over the baton. Your teeth bite down against the weapon. “Do not drop this.” 

Yelena lets go of her baton before kneeling down on one knee in front of you. She lifts up the hem of your t-shirt until the waistline of your sweats is exposed. “You should be wet by now.” 

You are not prepared for those words, and you are even less prepared when Yelena slips her hand between the fabric of your sweats and your skin. Her hand expertly slips underneath your soaked panties. The moment you feel her fingers brush against your wet sex, you let out a small moan. Your bite on her baton starts to loosen as every thought in your head diverts to her fingers. 

“You are losing focus,” she says as her fingers gather up some of your slick. “Your punishment will be worse if you drop my baton.” 

Your teeth dig back into the baton, and you are glad you did because you know for sure that you would have dropped the weapon when her fingers finally plunge into you. She gives you no time to properly react as her fingers begin thrusting in and out of you at a pace that pulls louder moans from you. She watches you as her fingers brush across your sweet spot. Her head tilts slightly to the side as her fingers continue to work you up. Her fingers are deft and merciless as you feel yourself steadily reaching that sweet, blissful edge. 

You’re getting so close, and you try to speak around the baton in your mouth but all that comes out are unintelligent noises. But right as you are about to spill over, her fingers disappear. Yelena pulls her hand out from your sweats. More unintelligent noises escape from your mouth as you voice your frustration. You are so close. Why did she stop? 

She ignores all your noises and gets up. Your head tilts back to look at her while her hand dips into the pocket of her green coat. “That is all you will get until you learn to behave.” Her other hand reaches out, and her fingers settle underneath your chin while her thumb softly strokes the side of your cheek. “But we will work on that, malýshka.” 

You feel something pinch the side of your neck. You don’t understand what is happening as you feel your body grow heavy. Yelena continues to watch you as your head suddenly feels very heavy and rolls forward. Your eyes shut, and you hear the baton hit the floor. Then nothing. 

When you wake, you are no longer in the study. You are laying on a couch in the living room. It’s quiet, and you don’t understand how you got here. You feel something draped over you. You turn your head to look, and you end up more confused. Draped across your body is Yelena’s green coat. What happened? One minute you were on the cusp of coming completely undone into the hands of this woman, and now you’re here. 

You sit up and part of Yelena’s coat falls away to reveal your hands bound in cuffs in front of you. Your clothes are still on, and you don’t see anyone around. In fact, you don’t hear the usual chatter of lounging goons. Everything is so quiet. What’s going on? You lift Yelena’s coat off of you and stand. The living room is empty, and the large flatscreen hanging on the wall is off. You are about to call out to anybody when you see it. 

Or rather, when you see him.

Laying on his back on the other side of the couch is Watson. He is dressed in the same navy business suit you saw him in earlier. So you couldn’t have been out for long. He is staring up at the ceiling with his eyes wide and his mouth open as if he is yelling. In the middle of his forehead, right above his eyebrows, is a red hole. Dark red blood pools on the wooden floor beneath his head. 

You are still putting together exactly what you are seeing when you hear fast, heavy footsteps rushing down the hallway. One of Watson’s goons emerges from the hallway. Usually, Watson’s goons can’t help themselves. They love touching you. They love any excuse to drag you to your Master. But this time, the goon doesn’t even spare you a look. He keeps running across the living room towards the foyer. 

Three gunshots make you jump and cry out as the goon stumbles. Fresh blood stains the backside of his shirt as he falls. You hear him struggling to push himself back onto his feet when someone else emerges from the hallway. 

Yelena. With her coat gone you see that she is dressed in a black tactical suit. Some blood has dried along the side of her face, but you don’t see any marks on her. In her hand is a gun, and she raises it towards the struggling goon. She pulls the trigger and another gunshot rips through the air. You take several steps back away from the couch as the goon goes still. 

“Oh my god,” you say, unable to stop yourself. You know you shouldn’t have drawn attention to yourself but what the fuck did you just watch? “You killed him. You just…” You look away from the goon’s body and you find Yelena looking at you. “...killed him.” You know that you’re repeating yourself, but it’s the only thing you can think to say. 

“Yes,” Yelena replies with a small nod. “That is what I am paid to do.” 

Paid? Your mouth opens and then closes as a million questions crash together in your head. 

Yelena moves towards the couch and reaches down to grab her coat. “Come. We cannot play twenty questions here. I have set the explosives to go off in five minutes.” 

You quickly take another step back. “I’m not going anywhere with you.” Then, a moment later when what she also said finally hits you. “Wait, explosives?” 

She puts her coat back on and moves towards you. “I think I drugged you too much. You are acting very slow.” You feel the warm barrel of her gun press against your side when she reaches you. “You do not get to choose. You are my prisoner.” The barrel of her gun digs into your side when you don’t move. “Do you want to walk or do you want me to shoot?” 

You still have so many questions, but the look Yelena gives you keeps you quiet. As much as you want to understand what the hell is going on, you also want to get as far away from all this as possible. But the gun makes both those things impossible. So, without any other choice available, you start to move towards the foyer. You see Yelena smile as she moves to walk behind you. She drags the barrel of her gun to press against your lower back.

“Good girl, malýshka,” she says. 

Her praise sends a shiver down your spine as you leave. 

#yelena belova x reader #yelena x reader #yelena belova imagine #yelena belova fanfic #yelena belova fanfiction #black widow x reader #black widow fanfiction #my fanfic #fic: loose ends

[i-heart-emos]

Come on fuck me emo boy/ Johnnie Guilbert x reader

18+

Pairing: Johnnie Guilbert x goth!virgin!reader

Summary: After a long time of thinking you decided your ready for Johnnie to take your v card but he also finds out some things he never knew about you

A/N: this is my first smut so please be gentle lmao and this is a request so thank you to the person who requested this hope you like it

Warnings: Smut, penetration, no protection, making out, hickies, piercings, Oral(F receiving), masturbation, hate comments, mentions of suicide,

As you stir awake you feel a pair of cold hands on your waist. You turn around greeted with a peck on the cheek from your boyfriend Johnnie.

“Morning the most beautiful person to walk this earth”

“Geez someone sappy this morning” you tease as you go to kiss him. He kisses back pulling you forward. You slip your tongue into his mouth as he lets out a little whimper. As it starts to get heated you hear a pounding at the door.

“HEY YOU TOO LOVEBIRDS BETTER NOT BE NAKED CAUSE IM COMING IN AND STEALING JOHNNIE” Jake yells from outside.

“Hey get your own boyfriend Jake” I holler back at him. I hear Johnnie laughing as me and Jake argue over who gets Johnnie. Finally Jake barges in

“Johnnie Guilbert we have a video to film get dressed this instance” Jake says like a middle aged mom

“Yes mother whatever you say” Johnnie exclaims and Jake finally shuts the door. You both slip out of bed when you go rummaging through your closet. One of Johnnie favorite parts about you where all your pretty dark outfits you’d wear

Today you settled on a black dress with lace over it which long slowly sleeves a black corset over it fishnets then long black socks with little bows on the end and you thick doc martens.

One Johnnie was finished getting ready he went to you and eyed you up and down.

“Good lord how did I get so lucky” he says wrapping his arms around you from behind and kissing your neck. This action cause you two giggles and heat to grow between you thighs.

“JOHNNIE WHERE LEAVING NOW LETS GO”

“Well looks like I’m leaving bye love” he says kissing you lips and walking out. How’d he get so lucky how’d you get so lucky. Yes Johnnie helped you grow more confident in your body but that doesn’t mean you still weren’t self conscious. Especially hearing what people would say on his streams or videos how Johnny deserves better it hurts.

As you sit at your vanity and start your makeup you grab your eyeliner and put it on. When your finally finished you get a text from Johnnie

Johnnie❤️🖤

J: Hey love where gonna be done in another hour can wait to see you.

Y/n: alright babe see you soon 🖤

You put your phone down and see another text come in from Tara

Tara🩷🩷🩷🩷

T: hey girl I was wondering if you wanna get dinner tonight I’ve been meaning to try this new place but no one’s available would you come

Y/n: course tar text me when you wanna meet

T: alright thank you 🩷🩷🩷

As you go through your bed and scroll through tiktok you hear your door unlock.

“Honey I’m home” you hear Johnnie yell from down stairs. You giggle the statement sounds so funny coming from his voice. You go downstairs to be greeting by Johnnie suffocating you in a hug.

“You hug me like I haven’t seen you in a month”. You giggle

“Might as well be” he mumbles into your neck

“Hey me and Tara are going to dinner tonight that okay” you ask

“Oh most definitely” he says

————————————————————————

Once you finished putting on your cross necklace and black choker and black lipstick on you grab your bat shaped purse and kiss Johnnie goodbye

One you finally make it to the restaurant Tara greets you and hug you very hard

“Hi omg girl you look so good if Johnnie didn’t take you I would have” she says laughing

“Have you seen yourself Tara you look amazing.

————————————————————————you get home quite late so you gently close the door not wanting to wake up Johnnie just in case. As you make your way up the stairs you start to hear something. Not till you get halfway up the flight of stairs do you know what you hear

Moaning.

It’s Johnnie you hear moaning and slapping as his balls meet his fist. Then you hear your name. You cheeks grow a deep shade of red as your head him moaning your name while jerking off.

“Oh god Y/N you feel so good wrapped around me oh my god I’m gonna I’m gonna cum” you finally push open the door just as he’s cumming

“Oh my god Y/N I’m so sorry I didn’t hear you come back and when you where gone my thoughts just got ahead of me and next thing you know I’m-“

You cut him off by kissing him deeply climbing into his lap. He starts trailing kisses down your jaw til he gets to your neck sucking feel hickies on your soft skin.

As you bring your hand down to palm him through his black skinny jeans he stops your hand. You look up at him glossy eyed

“Are you sure about this” he said” I know you’ve never done anything like this and I don’t wanna pressure you”

“I’m sure just remember I’m not….skinny. You state feeling your insecurities slowly creeping up on you.

“I couldn’t care less” he say enthusiastically slowly kissing down your neck. He looks up at your with a devilish smirk and drops to his knees

Your face quickly heats up realizing what he about to do. He kisses up your legs then suck dark hickies on your thick thighs.

“So pretty” kiss” so gorgeous” kiss “amazing” kiss.

He continues praising you in between each kiss till he makes his way to the edge of your dress.

“May I” he asks looking up at you with his big beautiful blue eyes

“Yes Johnnie you may” you add he smiled lifting up your dress revealing your matching set of skeleton bra and panties.

“So pretty” he say tracing the skulls in your bra making you let out a small gasp. You grab your bras hook slowly unhooking it.

Johnnie looks up at you with a sparkle in his eyes as you discard your bra. He sees your pierced nipples and gasps.

“A virgin with pierced nipples that’s new” he says with a chuckle rubbing his thumbs across them.

“Do you like” you ask looking down at him

“Do I like them I fucking love them” he says putting one of them in his mouth.

You throw your head back as more heat rises to your core.

“I got them when we started dating so you’d have a nice surprise when we eventually had sex” you stated with a slight blush

“Best surprise ever” he said leaving your nipples with a slight pop sound. “Can I take these off” he asks now tracing your panties.

“Yes” you say lowly he eagerly takes them off revealing your glistening heat arousal dripping down your folds.

“god your so fucking gorgeous” he say licking a long stripe up your pussy.

You throw your head back at the new feeling. “Mph so good Johnnie” he continues licking and sucking on your folds when you feel yourself getting close

“Wait Johnnie stop” he quickly moves away

“Is something wrong are you bro ready I’m sorry I didn’t mean to pressure you” he rambles off looking worried

“No no I want to I just wanna cum on you” you say face getting impossible redder. ThIs caused Johnnie to get redder to.

“Oh I’m of course” he say lifting up his shirt revealing all his hot tattoos then unbuckling his skull belt pulling down his black skinny jeans. This revealed his hard member it had a vein running from his shaft to his tip which was leaking pre

“You’re so pretty” you say kissing his tip. He let out a guttural groan. He sat back down in his gaming chair and patted his lap. You got up and positioned yourself on him. You slowly sank down till he was fully in you

“Alright baby tell me when you want me to move alright” he said sweetly “ mhm ok Johnnie” Johnnie i said moving to adjust. Once I was ready I slightly nodded my head.

He started thrusting up in a perfect rhythm. I threw my head back and let out moans and whimpers it felt amazing.

“That’s my good girl your taking me so well pretty girl” you just nod at his praise feeling your approaching orgasm.

“Johnnie I’m gonna” you say barely able to finish your sentence.

“Me to love where do you want me” he asks panting heavily

“In me please I’m on the pill” I say which is all that took Johnnie to spill his seed inside of you triggering your orgasm. As he rode your through your night you came to a stop.

You not stood there panting when he slowly got up picking you up. “Let’s go take a shower alright boo”

“Mhm nice warm shower” you said to Johnnie as he guided you in the shower which just let to more praise of him telling how good you here for your first time and how proud of you he was.

You were so lucky to have a Johnnie in your life who excepts you for who you are.

————————————————————————

Bonus:

After the showing you and Johnnie where cuddling in bed in your no name pajamas when Jake busted the door open.

“I don’t know what the hell that was but next time you do that warn me so I can leave” he says

You hide your face in your hand as Johnnie just cracks up

————————————————————————

A/N: I’m so sorry this came out so late I got sick then had some family stuff and it’s just been a hell of a month but I hope you enjoy my first Johnnie Gilbert fic and smut please request if you want more

#fanfic #spicy content #johnnie guilbert smut #smut #goth aesthetic #goth girl #gothcore #johnnie guilbert x you #johnnie guilbert #johnnie x reader #oneshot

[thecarnivorousmuffinmeta]

At one point in TMWWBK Alphard comments that he isn't falling for the Voldemort thing because he's too old for it, but that he would've been tricked if he had been younger. Is Alphard right about how he would be an enthusiastic Death Eater to the end if he were that age, or would he be more like Regulus?

The Man Who Would Be King by me and @therealvinelle

You know, interesting question, the answer is as with most things "yes but no". Let's dive in.

Alphard the Cynic

Alphard's extremely cynical by nature, he's just predisposed to it, and when presented anything his first instinct is usually 'doubt' and 'is this reasonable'/'prove it to me'. This is part of the reason he thinks so much about the blood purity thing/more than other characters in the story in his position. He does want to be able to say why it's correct and not just believe that he believes it because he wants to (because that would be stupid). Trouble is he only goes far enough to assure himself he's right then washes his hands of it because it's all settled now.

But some guy showing up, calling himself 'Voldemort' (that can't be his real name), who nobody seems to know, whose saying all these radical things that none of them have accomplished on their own, even though his grand enemies are just Muggle-borns who aren't scary at all, with no real concrete plans of how to do it or what things will look like after beyond "Muggle-borns gone! No Squibs! Hooray!", this guy sounds like a fraud.

When Alphard first hears of this guy, even at 15 or whatever he'd be, he'd be extremely dubious and stubbornly set in to disapprove of this guy. He immediately thinks this guy is after money and any second now they'll all be hearing "and that's why you should fund my campaign to get rid of the Muggle-borns". The more Alphard hears about his friends praising this guy, the more stubborn Alphard gets as now he hates Taylor Swift on principle.

He comes up with all sorts of reasons of why Voldemort sucks, really refining his talking points anybody asks, but half the reason he hates this guy is to just be a hater/out of pure stubbornness by this point.

"All her songs sound the same!"

Alphard the Teenager

The trouble with Alphard would be if he gets cajoled to a party/recruitment effort. He spends so much time hating on Voldemort but he hasn't listened to him/seen him once? Alphard realizes that this is true and that he'll sound much more convincing if he goes once, says he hates it, and is able to throw whatever stupid points this man makes back in his face.

Alphard agrees, determined to hate on this man so hard he'll be run out of town.

Trouble is, Tom's really well-spoken, charismatic, and so hot.

Alphard finds himself unwillingly captivated watching this guy speak even though he's saying complete nonsense. He's magnetic, his speeches have this compelling quality to them, and has Alphard mentioned he's stupid hot?

Alphard finds to his horror that instead of coming up with great talking points of "this man is so stupid, here's all the stupid things he said" he ended up drooling on his robes and forgetting his name for thirty minutes.

Alphard is probably then offered the opportunity to talk directly to this guy, friends and family inspired as Alphard hasn't softened exactly but isn't able to say anything after that very convincing speech.

This is even worse because now the man's a foot away from Alphard, even hotter up close, and paying attention to every word Alphard's saying in a way that most people really don't.

Alphard manages to splutter out the arguments he thought were very very impressive not so long ago but they come out sounding very dumb and worse the man isn't even insulted. He instead listens patiently as Alphard explains himself and (smelling fresh blood) comes up with some explanation for each of them (Alphard still wants to be dubious and his answers are weird but he's just so hot). Alphard walks away in shame, having been thoroughly humiliated, and muttering out his agreement of "sure... I'll go... next time..."

He makes himself a script, even further talking points, because this time he won't look like a fucking tool only to have the same result/worse as somehow he and Voldemort get into discussions about history/magic/the arts/books, everything Alphard's super into that everyone finds really boring but somehow this man knows all about. Worse, he clearly knows more about it than Alphard, the man seems to know fucking everything and is incredibly gifted with magic for all Alphard doesn't want to admit that.

He's even read fucking Shakespeare.

What the fuck.

Before Alphard knows it, he's just as embroiled as the rest, and while he likes to get into esoteric debates over "hey, why are our stupid property damage plans actually a good idea or not" he's a sucker just as much as the rest of them and really really really wants hot senpai to notice him.

About Regulus

The heresy of the day about Regulus is I don't think Regulus is what fandom or Harry thought he was either. (Yes, here's where I messed up remembering things). And after rereading HBP, there's updates to be made of that.

But that's a story for another day.

#harry potter #the man who would be king #alphard black #tom riddle #meta #headcanon #opinion

[rickydoodahgrimez]

flirty girl || rick grimes x flirty!reader

summary: rick falling in love with a flirty reader headcanons :)

ok, so first yeah, you two meet at the farm

you see him for the first time and you think ‘damn he's fine’ but when is he not fine

then you see him sitting on the porch of the house and you decided to up to him to talk and stuff

ten minutes past by and you guys are laughing like your fucking best friends that has known each other for years

you decided to throw in some flirty comments here and there, like a friendly joke and you know what this man does? HE STARTS BLUSHING

so, next thing you know, every single time rick comes up to you, BOOM flirty joke. he asks you what you're having for dinner? BOOM flirty joke. he asks you to help him out with walkers? BOOM, flirty joke

it's getting to the point is that your new life goal is to flirt with this man

OK so fast forward to the prison

just because you flirt with rick doesn't mean you don't love lori and carl??

like bitch, you call her baby inside her stomach nugget?? you're obsessed with her and just because of rick, doesn't mean you don't flirt with her too ;)

since you're basically around rick all the time, that means you see carl a lot too

AND HE IS THE CUTEST ON GOD

bro, you're basically this guy's IDOL

every single time you go on a run, you always bring back magazines for carl and when you give it to him, this boy will give you the tightest hug of you LIFE

and rick's heart melts when he sees you with carl and he's like ‘catching feels?’

SPEAKING of rick, since lori finds amusement out of you flirting with rick, i feel like you flirting with rick has become more frequent

and sometimes rick comes back with a flirty comeback?? 😫

like, when did this bitch become so bold out of a sudden???

other than that, i feel like rick would be so. . ✨possessive✨

like let's say, you get yourself into tricky situations, you go — to? flirting.

and you know what rick is? jealous.

especially when merle is there and he flirts with you everyday and rick tells him to fuck off out of jealousy??

#FOLDING

unfortunately, all happy things come to an end 😔

when lori dies, rick confides in you with EVERYTHING because he just knows he can trust you

we don't talk about how lori dies before merle comes and i wrote it wrong

although, you're also grieving lori, you're there for rick 24/7

when you first see rick holding judith, that's when you knew you were in love with him

speaking of judith, that girl has you WRAPPED around her little finger

like every single time you walk past her, she coos and you always try to resist it, but you end up cuddling her anyways :3

you know the illness in season 4? yeah, unfortunately you have it (sorry pookie 😔)

and my bae rick is stressing

like, he be going on runs left, right and centre just to find something that can heal you

i mean everyone is because they can't lose their ball of sunshine (even daryl's stressing)

anyways, back to rick, he is snapping at everyone (except from carl) because he just can't lose you

fan behaviour if you ask me 🤷‍♀️

now, time skip to where the g*verner comes

so basically, when the g*verner comes to the prison, my boy is SOO protective over you

he is keeping you behind him at ALL times

ESPECIALLY when the g*verner and his men starts shooting at them

TIME SKIP TO TERMINUS

so basically, when you escaped the prison, you were alone with only baby judith in your arms

and then soon (around two weeks later) you see carol and tyreese walk on a train track

you guys talk for a while and then you guys hear an explosion

carol and tyreese go to check it out and when they come back, they say that rick, carl, daryl and michonne are there

carol said she's gonna go bomb the place? and what do you do? YOU FUCKING JOIN HER BITCH-

anyways. . y'know when rick and daryl are on that rectangular thing, about to get their heads chopped off and they hear an explosion? 2 seconds later, boom your shooting everyone with a rifle

you escort all your friends out of the premises and once your outside, the tears finally start to fall out

rick engulfs you in some massive ass hug and you feel tears staining your shoulder

you feel someone hugging your waist and you see carl with tears in his eyes, holding tightly to your waist

rick removes his head from your shoulder and kisses your temple and if you wasn't holding onto rick you're sure your knees would have buckled

after you hug everyone else, you all start walking in a random direction and while you are walking with michonne, you and rick making love eyes at each other

i'm not bothered to introduce gabriel rn so let's skip to the CHURCH (ps. all you need to know is that rick was VERY protective of you, on your way to the church 😉)

i think we all know how protect he is when those pricks who ate bob's leg comes to the church

bro get's mad when the ‘leader’ mentions you, my guy was ready to shoot him in the head right there if it wasn't for daryl

anyways they're all at the barn where they have aaron hostage and when rick notices him looking at you?

FINISHED

like he's saying ‘keep your eyes off my girl’ and shit

but he does kinda feel bad when he finds out he's gay but not really at the same time

let's go to alexandria 😏

anyways, this is when the jealousy comes in

so one day, you are strolling to rick's house and you open it without knocking because why not, then you see a blonde woman giving rick a hair cut and flirting with him??

and in your head, you're like ‘bitch???’

OBVIOUSLY you have to step your game up but you keep seeing them together and you just give up

to the point where you're barely even around rick anymore and he starts to get pissy about it

flirting 😏

he keeps on talking to you but you're just giving bare dry answers cause fuck communication 🤪

it gets to the point where he's not even sleeping at night

you know when deanna throws a party for the group? yeah that's when the real shit happens

you arrive like a ✨diamond✨ and rick can't keep his eyes off of you

so you do what you to best

but instead of flirting with rick, you're flirting with deanna's son, spencer

rick's decided that's he's had enough and he DRAGS you out of the place and he does not give a fuck about the eyes watching him

but being the gentleman he is, he doesn't have your wrist in a tight grip 🥰

because of that, you break out of his grip easily

and after the crying, the love confession, first kiss, blah blah blah YOU GUYS ARE FINALLY TOGETHER

since you guys are together now, flirting EVERY SECOND, EVERY MINUTE, EVERY HOUR OF EVERY DAY

rick = 200% more protective

since you two are together, I feel like carl would start to call you mum because he sees you as his and judith starts saying it as well 😭

perfect little family fr

even when you're old and wrinkly, you're still with rick ;)

as if that man could get rid of you

no negan today sorry, he decided to be a good person 👍

#rick grimes x gn! reader #rick grimes x reader #headcanons #flirty!reader #rick grimes headcanons

[nekkomaa]

Warnings: Violence, inappropriate language, manipulation, toxic relationships.

Notes: I'm really surprised that I managed to write another chapter in such a short space of time. I hope this cheers you up a bit! Comments and reblogs are appreciated!!!

I'd love to know if you'd prefer a protagonist with a name, or a “reader” protagonist

Portuguese version published on Wattpad

Word count: 2038

“You know I love you very much, don't you, darling?” David smiles at you, a venomous smile, his gaze containing a silent threat, daring you to do something wrong while he's away.

“I know. I love you too.” You answer, it's disgusting to have to say it, you've hesitated many times before, but you knew the hard way that it was better to go with the flow of things, to let things go his way. Here, you're nothing. “Come back safe.” You say, as he waves to you and walks through the front door. Secretly you wish he'd never come back.

“I'll be back soon.” He replies, his voice muffled as the door closes.

You don't move, not until you stop listening to the sound of the car's tires against the gravel. Letting out a breath you didn't even know you were holding, you move towards the bedroom. You'd go back to sleep, it was late and you didn't even like the idea of playing the good wife and saying goodbye. At this point you were in an internal struggle, not knowing what to feel, but at the same time you felt nothing, you felt hatred for him.

You climb the steps slowly, the darkness of the house becomes gloomy, as you face the large corridor that extends to the end of the stairs, you take a moment to look at the white door at the end of the corridor, you think about trying to open it in a moment of courage, he wasn't home, he couldn't stop you from opening the door.

You give up when you remember that the door would obviously be locked, David wasn't stupid, he knew that someone could try to open the door while he was away, whether it was you or the maid.

Opening the bedroom door, you are surprised by a cold wind coming from the window, a strange feeling of fear and doubt comes over you. You're sure that when you left the room, the window was closed, as was the whole house. With hesitant steps you walk to the window, there is no light except the new moon shining outside. When you reach the window, you feel your body shiver, the sensation of being watched passes through you for a moment, you look down cautiously and discover that the guard who is always at the door is passed out and tied up in front of the jeep they use for work.

Your heart races, you hear his pulse in your ear, you're stunned for a moment, not knowing whether to take the opportunity to flee, or whether you should hide, someone has passed out the guard and tied him up, just when David isn't at home, and by chance the window is open, your window.

Your thoughts are racing, you know there's someone in the house with you, but how did he get in so quickly? David left a few seconds ago, could you have wasted more than half an hour just climbing the stairs?

With a quick breath you feel the need to look for any kind of weapon to defend yourself, whoever got in here certainly wouldn't spare your life. You look next to you, a tacky lamp is there, and next to it a medium-sized plant pot, you grab it without thinking too much, as you turn back you squint your eyes trying to see into the partially lit room, you notice something moving towards you and you don't hesitate to throw the pot in its direction.

You can see the silhouette of a person, the vase hits them and falls to the floor, apparently it didn't even have an effect, you're not sure where you hit it, but you knew that if you didn't hit a vital part you were screwed.

He kept advancing, the black shadow was fast, you dodged by reflex when you hit him the first thing you saw, a pillow was thrown and distracted him long enough for you to run towards the door. Panic filled your veins, you would be killed, you would die living a dull life shrouded in panic.

Anger fills your senses, you hate it all, you hate David, you hate this house, you hate looking in the mirror and seeing a shell of what you were with each passing day, you hate yourself.

You can only hear your quick steps towards the kitchen, you only hear the rustle of clothes behind you, whatever is chasing you moves like a ghost.

The sharp turn you make at the door seems to delay your pursuer by a few seconds, giving you time to grab the first pan you see in front of you to defend yourself, the kitchen is brighter than your bedroom thanks to the large windows it has, you can see what's chasing you as soon as you turn back, But you didn't even have time to register what it looked like, as in the blink of an eye he was inches away from you with something in his hand, without wasting any time you hit the pan on his hand and then on what you thought was his head, the sound of the pan hitting echoed in the empty house.

Your luck seemed to run out the moment that pot hit his head. You felt your throat tighten immediately afterwards, the air being cut from your lungs.

You could take a closer look at what was chasing you now, unfortunately it was in the worst way, and not with the chaser passed out from the pan.

Everything was incredibly black except for the white skull staring at you in the dark, you couldn't see the eyes through the holes, but you could feel them piercing you. The tightness in your throat loosened slightly as soon as he saw that you weren't squirming. The pan that had been in your hand was forgotten on the floor, the counter behind you was clean, there were no weapons to use, if you wanted to get out alive, you had to be smart.

Anger and fear were strongly intertwined with each other, but anger in a fragile body like yours wouldn't solve anything. Fear, however, only served to make you soft, the survival instinct seemed to work the other way around, telling you to stay still, as if your predator couldn't see you, as if your predator didn't have his hand on your throat.

“What…” Your voice comes out lower and shakier than you first intended, but you continue anyway. “What do you want from me?” The man in front of you brings his second hand into your field of vision, the knife glinting on the moon, his body trembling with anticipatory fear. He realizes this and lowers the knife until it is facing his face.

“No funny business, okay?” He says to you and carefully releases you, his gloved hand moves away from your neck and he signals for you to remain silent. You just nod back. There were no loopholes to escape, so collaborating at the moment seemed the right thing to do.

He ties your wrists together in front of you and uses them to guide you into the room where he entered. He sits you on the bed and faces you. He seemed big before, but now, this was much more than you first thought. That made it worse, he seemed much more indimidating with her.

“You're going to tell me what I want to know, if you lie, I'll take action.” He remains where he is staring at you for a while longer before signaling for you to speak. “Do you understand?”

“Yes.” His voice remains low, he doesn't seem to care, anyway, even if you were completely hysterical screaming and calling for help, no one would come, he's passed out the only guard in the house, and in the place where you live, so far away from everything, it's obvious that no one would ever hear you.

“Where's your husband? Where did he go?” His voice was harsh, to the point. He seemed out of patience.

“I-I… don't know” His voice faltered, he took it as a lie. The knife from before soon came into view again, he twirled it between his fingers like a threat.

“I'm sure we fought before, didn't we? No lies, or should I make it clear that I'm armed?” His voice showed a lack of patience, and you certainly wouldn't want to test his patience.

“I swear.” You tried again.

“Little thing, if you're going to lie you should try to be more convincing, anyone swears. Now tell the truth, where is your shitty little husband?” He takes a step closer, the knife still twirling between his fingers. The movement would be mesmerizing if it weren't for this situation. “Aren't you going to tell me that a good wife like you doesn't know where her husband is?” He teases, his voice now sounding sweet, a hint of amusement in it.

“I don't know where he is! You have to believe me!” You beg as he comes closer, the knife threatening you with every move.

“And why would I believe you, darling? As far as I know you're just pretending you don't know anything just to get your husband's fat ass off the hook.” The knife hovers inches from your neck, you swear you can feel the cold steel.

“I don't know who you are or what you want but if it's money or some kind of information I'm sorry you're talking to the wrong person!” You speak quickly, despair coursing through your veins, you're going to end up dead, and you haven't even had a chance to leave this place.

“You have to know something. He's not keeping you here for free.” He comes close to your ear. “Even if you are his pet, it's impossible that you don't know anything.” He steps back and watches your reaction.

Swallowing dryly, you remember the room at the end of the corridor, the place you never entered. “There is, there's a room at the end of the corridor.” You stutter as the knife lightly grazes your neck, stinging as he moves away from you.

“Yes? And what's in the room?” He asks.

“All the letters he receives are there, if there's any kind of information it's there.” You reply, the man seems satisfied with your answer.

“I said you knew something.” He comments, his voice now more amused, something like a mockery of I knew it! “You're coming with me.” He pulls you up and leads you into the hallway. The white door at the end faces you, you hope to escape from this house as soon as this man leaves with whatever he's looking for, if you stay, and David comes back, you're sure to be dead.

The man turns the handle and the door doesn't move. He snorts in annoyance and pushes you behind him.

“I don't have the key.” You say as soon as he pushes you back.

“Well, I never said I needed one.” He replies quickly. You watch him step away from the door and kick it, the door opens on the second kick and soon he's pulling you into the room with him.

“I told you what I know, you're going to let me go… right?” The uncertainty in his voice is palpable, you wince as he throws you a look. With the light in the room now, you can see his eyes. A deep brown stares back at you, if before he was intimidating even without seeing you properly, imagine now that those eyes pierce right through to your soul from across the room.

“I don't usually leave witnesses, you little thing.” That's the only thing he says to you.

Credits for the mask used in the second image: @Mcmorthern on twitter.

If you are the owner of the image and want it removed, please contact me!

#call of duty #cod x reader #ghost x you #simon ghost riley #simon ghost riley x reader #ghost x reader #ghost fanfiction #ghost cod

[marypaol]

Say You Won’t Let Go

Harry James Potter x fem!reader

Summary: Harry wants to stay with her till they’re gray and old… as long as she doesn’t let go.

Warnings: Kissing? Talk of future? I think that’s it! <3

Note: In Harry’s POV yet it’s third person. I hope that makes sense to y’all. :)

Note #2: Based on the song “Say You Won’t Let Go” by James Arthur. Not the whole song though. (Some lyrics)

Between each lyric- time skip. Lyrics in italics! :)

Masterlist

Requests closed at the moment

Also started another blog! @honeychamomile1

I pulled you closer to my chest. And you asked me to stay over, I said, “I already told ya, I think that you should get some rest.”

“I’m so tired.” She grumbled. Her body squirmed under the blankets as she tried to seek a comfortable position.

“I know.” Harry chuckled in response, his fingers traveling along the skin of her arm as he kissed her temple.

She hummed, her eyes once closed but when he responded she fluttered them open, eyes sparkling at the sight of him.

“You’re so pretty, Harry.” She laughed out, hand coming up to stroke his cheek, then reaching up to adjust his glasses.

She pulled him forward with her arm around his neck, digging her face into it, and he thanked Merlin she couldn’t see his red face then. He pulled her closer to his chest, arm wrapped around her back as she was once now flushed against him.

“You should stay the night.” She whispered, snuggling herself deeper into him as she kissed the skin of his neck.

He squirmed at the feeling, the tickle sensation spreading from the area she was kissing to his toes. He sighed once she stopped, having to stop the giggles that were threatening to leave his mouth.

He leaned back, taking his arm out from behind her back so she wouldn’t crush it and stroked her hair out of her face as he looked at her.

“I already told you,” he sighed. “you should get some rest.”

She groaned at his reminder, hands reaching up to ruffle his already messed up hair. She was gonna be honest, there wasn’t a time she saw it neat. That that she was complaining, his feisty hair was one of her favorite things about him.

She then pouted when her eyes met his. He chuckled at her stubbornness, shaking his head at her.

“Don’t look at me like that, I have to go back to Ron.” He reminded with a teasing warning look.

“I was hoping you would stay when I gave you the puppy eyes.” She said, putting the show on again. He shook his head once again as an answer.

She pouted deeper, her eyes dropping before she gained composure again to hide the fact she was tired.

“Rude.” She muttered, dropping her hands from his hair.

He laughed on how cute she looked, kissing her pout away with a soft kiss to the lips.

When you looked over your shoulder

For a minute I forget that I’m older

I wanna dance with you right now

Oh, and you look as beautiful as ever

And I swear that everyday you’ll get better

You make me feel this way somehow

Harry could hear the shuffling from the seat next to him, his lover not seeming to be finding a satisfactory position to sit in while doing their work.

“I don’t know what to write!” She exclaimed, dropping her quill as she made movements in the air with her hands in exasperation.

Harry shrugged, peeking at the page number she was on in her textbook and turning to it in his own. The two were doing their Divination homework, Professor Trelawney wanting them to see how the next month for them will go.

“I’m about done with taking this seriously,” she started, shaking her head.

“You’ve been thinking I’ve been?” Harry added, but she continued, ignoring his comment.

“I’m making it up.” She decided, grabbing her quill and looking at her book, humming as she found a potential imaginary scenario that will most likely not happen anyways.

“I’ll….lose a bet….?” She suggested, still looking at her book.

Harry nods before realizing she’s not looking at him.

“Yeah, sounds good,” he replies. “Um…and I’ll…be unlucky for one week.”

She grinned at him. “Mine’s more believable.”

He scoffed. “My book doesn’t have any good ones!” He said as an excuse.

She laughed. “We have the same book!”

“Whatever-get me a different Divination book in the library, will ya?”

She rolled her eyes but got up nonetheless, searching the shelves for something better for the boy. Even though the book she was using was just fine.

She heard him close the book he was previously using and looked over her shoulder at him.

Harry just so happened to be already looking at her, and forgot everything he was thinking about moments prior. He forgot he was a year older since his birthday was in the summer, forgot that his mind should be focused on school work. His brain was occupied with thoughts on how beautiful she looked at the moment. Her eyes sparkled at the sight of him looking flustered just by looking at her, his bright green eyes something she easily got lost in.

He suddenly had the urge to get up and dance with her right in the middle of the library, despite his lack of dancing skills. Her wanted to embrace her as a way to claim her his, despite the fact she already was.

Everyday she seemed to get more beautiful, more breathtaking, and more gorgeous.

Even after she chuckled at his act, turning away with thoughts all about him, a soft fuzzy feeling flooded Harry, making him feel all warm inside.

His fingertips became tingly, itching to touch her face her hair her everything. She just left him and he already longed for her to come back.

She did just that a couple minutes later, laying a book down for him as they exchanged smiles.

I'm so in love with you

And I hope you know

Darling, your love is more than worth its weight in gold

We've come so far, my dear

Look how we've grown

And I wanna stay with you until we're grey and old

Just say you won't let go

Just say you won't let go

“Say you won’t let go.”

The sentence made her head come up from his chest, her fingers halting their movements on his hand.

She looked at him and laughed halfheartedly. “What?”

He was serious when she looked at him, and so her small smile dropped suddenly at his serious mood switch.

“Say you won’t let go.” Harry repeated.

“You know I won’t, Harry.” She whispered, reaching up to stroke his cheek, the smooth skin soft beneath her finger tips.

“Promise?” Harry asked hesitantly, doubt swarming in his stomach.

She sat up then, and for a split dying second he thought she was gonna leave, leaving him alone in the bed.

Instead she sat o his lap, his back leaning against the headboard. She sighed, legs on either side of his waist as her arms came up, sliding up his shoulders before her hands wrapped around his neck. “Harry,” she whispered, leaning closer.

“I want to stay with you until we’re grey and old. So old we don’t be able to get out of bed, so old neither of us can hear properly anymore. So old that we both have wrinkles covering our faces and even more when we smile. And I do that a lot around you.” She added, smiling as she said such things.

“Really?” Harry asked, voice barely audible. But she heard him well, nodding her head. “Yes,” she started, leaning closer and pecking his lips, sweet and soft, loving and kind. “And I definitely won’t be letting go any time soon.”

“I love you.” Harry whispered.

“And I love you.” She said back against his lips.

I hope you guys liked it!

#harry james potter x y/n #harry p x reader #harry james potter x reader #harry potter x reader #harry x reader #harry potter imagine #harry imagine #harry #harry potter #imagines #stories #x reader #hogwarts school of witchcraft and wizardry #Harry imagines! #harry james potter #Harry James x reader #Harry pottah x reader #Harry James potter x you #Harry Potter imagines with fluff #fluff #Harry fluff #harry potter fluff #harry James potter fluff

[sirenjose]

So I've been really into your analysis lately and I'm a huge fan now, wanted to ask some questions, feel free to not answer any

1- what was your favourite idv story/event to analyze?

2- your least fav of the latter?

3- are you into anything else besides idv?

4-how do you find the motivation to analyze stuff? I've tried before and it was very draining :')

Thanks for your time, hope you have a lovely day

I'm very happy to hear you're enjoying yourself despite my own low opinion about much of what I put out. I'll do my best to answer!

Hmm I always dislike picking favorites because I'm bad at picking eheh... But the ones I liked most... I honestly enjoy T&I and COA (1-5) even more than the main story. So I think I might pick... Atropos' Ropes for T&I and for COA, thats harder... 3-5 are my faves but I might pick 4 just because of how it felt it had the most story/details given than all the rest. Even the *SONG* had story. I loved it.

Least fave, eh... Orfeo and Zinaida immediately come to mind, though Orfeo I'd say was worse... COA 1 is another primarily because of how DIFFICULT it was for me to figure it out enough to put together an analysis. And I had to rewrite that thing at LEAST 3 times to the point I'm just hoping it's good enough and leaving it alone. Time of Reunion I think is another that comes to mind, mainly because I didn't appreciate how they treated Norton in there, especially in the videos (but at least those aren't canon like the in-game event was). So based on all that, I might say Orfeo if I really had to pick 1. Then rank ToR 2nd and Zinaida/COA1 3rd.

FF14 and Honkai Star Rail especially I'm playing actively these days, but I honestly like a lot of stuff. Like Persona (espeially 4), 999 aka Zero Escape, and Star Ocean Til the End of Time. Least in terms of games.

Hmm... Maybe because the 1st reason I play a game is because of the story, and gameplay is always 2nd to me. If the story and characters are good, that gets me interested. Issue with IDV is we only get bits and pieces. Really need to look deeper to really understand some of the characters. I actually only started analyzing because I challenged myself (partially out of curiosity for the answer) to see if I could prove if Norton wasn't as evil as people thought (based on all the comments I saw when I 1st joined the fandom a long while ago). From there, there was Jose who I wanted to analyze because he honestly had so many plot holes I couldn't (and still can't completely) solve. So I get the most enjoyment analyzing something that doesn't have a clear answer. Which is why I don't always post for every letter. A big part of it is I enjoy history and culture and such, so it's fun for me to learn about different foods, or time periods, or how bad the environment was for miners or sailors back in the day, etc... I dont think I have an easy answer (I can see I'm rambling). Norton I actually only began to like because I was spending so long working on my 1st analysis for him (and my perfectionism made me analyze all of Norton's essences before i could call it finished). Jose was because I love Captain Hook, and then after because of the plot holes that bothered me. Then for others, I think I enjoy making analyses to... try to sometimes change people's opinoions/beliefs. Like with Margaretha or Vera. With Edgar was because I was more interested in his story and him as a character only once I put together all his lore. Sort of goes on from there. I could ramble on but I'm going to get even more guilty. I hope this helps somewhat, but let me know if it doesn't and I'll keep going. Maybe the simple is A) I like history/culture/research, B) I like to convince people that certain characters arent as evil as they think or change beliefs I think aren't quite accurate, C) I like solving puzzles and I love story, D) I already think too hard about literally everything, and combined with my perfectionism, we get analysis

[ratherbefangirling]

Mi casa (3.5)

Previous | Next

Genre: omegaverse, Angst, hurt/comfort, fluff

Pairing: ot7 x reader

Warning ⚠️: funeral, insensitive comments, suicide ideation(please if you feel this way please get help)

It's rare that you and namjoon fight the two of you avoid fighting each other like plague. Always ready to be understanding, to forgive, to let go , to kiss and make up. When one of you is stubborn the other yields and is generous.

But when it did happen then the two of you are stubborn as mule and it gives Jin a headache. Because every one comes to complain to him. He's the pack alpha. He knows it's his job. Normally he loves being the Alpha. But in times like this he can feel his blood pressure shoot through the roof.

The most common fights he has to break are between Taehyung and Jimin. But it's usually simpler. Yoongi and Hobi try to make Jimin understand and Namjoon and Jungkook handle Taehyung. But when it's about the other soulmate pair namely you and Joon it's tough. Because you are closest to each other. Like some sort of cocoon. He doesn't mind he sort of gets it. But in such situations. He's extra stressed about not hurting the either of you. Because its easy for both of you to feel alienated.

If he takes Namjoons side you may feel like he hasn't accepted you as pack and if he takes yours Namjoon may feel like everyone is against him and its not a pretty scene.

Jungkook comes in the kitchen whistling as Jin sits and contemplates the situation. Jugkook takes a bottle of water from the fridge and chugs it and keeps it back. He slaps Jin's butt as he sits next to Jin and opens a bag of chips and starts eating.

"Ya Jeon Jungkook. I've told you not to eat those they are Y/n's"

"I'll buy her more." Jungkook replies and Jin gives him a look of disbelief.

"It's fine. She'll forgive me. She's too busy being mad at Namjoon hyung anyway"

"Do you have any idea why they fought."

"I do." Jungkook says taking another bite.

Jin rolls his eyes.

"And when were you going to mention it?"

Jungkook shrugs. "No one asked me. Besides you always say not to interfere between the two."

"I know. But from now on tell me... only me"

"Y/n-ie found invitations to Namjoon's company dinner. So she asked him. He said it wasn't a big deal. But he's getting an award and perhaps bonus. He said he didn't tell her cause he knows she hates the events and he didn't want to force her."

"That's it?"

"Nope. Then she said are you embarrassed of me. To which he was like you're my soulmate and then she said that's not an answer to what I'm asking and then it got pretty ugly."

"And how did you hear this?"

"I was using her bathroom cause the others were busy."

Jin can't help but smile at the other boys antics.

Yoongi comes in carrying a parcel.

"Jungkook did you order something?"

Jungkook perks up excited. "Its here. Me and Y/n-ie ordered embroidery kits. I'll go take it to her." Jungkook takes the parcel.

Yoongi pats Jin's back. "It'll be alright we've been through worse."

Jin nods. Its true.

Jungkook decides to take a banana milk and other flavored milks pack and grabs a couple snacks. Seamlessly balancing everything and going towards your room.

You and Jungkook often did things together. The two of you bonded over buying new things and DIY kits often taking help if needed or even just including other pack members. Like the time you needed Joons help with the planting kit and Yoongi's help finding sand paper to complete your DIY wooden ship. The time you tried Resin was fun. You still use the trays you both made with Jimin and Tae. You'd even made a book mark for Joon. You also did self DIY projects like the time you had begged Hobi to give up some of his shoes so you could paint them. Sometimes when you went to the Sunday Market. You'd stop with Joon at the book stall. Once you'd found an old recipe book and then it was you and jungkook and Jimin and failed attempt at some sort of microwave cake which was as hard as a stale cookie though the kitchen did smell great.

Your life now was filled with all these little moments which made it so beautiful. Ofcourse sometimes you do wonder. Was it really necessary to loose your old family for this one and you put the thought away because you cannot be ungrateful you must not be or you might loose this as well.

(Before)

You've worn a mourning black dress. You're exhausted from meeting the lawyer to doing paperwork and emptying your room at the shelter. It was a bit silly but you'd stayed till the very last moment. Hoping against hope and silently praying that your mate would come. But hope was a painful thing and a luxury you couldn't afford. So you cried a little inside your new bathroom or rather your old one at your uncle's place. Which was now your own. Wondering when would it be over.

You're the chief mourner. And you can't help but think it's good your soulmate chose their pack over you because you seem to kill everyone around you.

A lot of people come. Offering their condolences.

He was a good man.

He loved his wife so much.

A great man the likes of whom we don't see.

He will be missed.

Such a loss.

Untimely death.

You supposed the death of a person forgave their sins.

The whispers are everywhere.

You go outside for a while. To get yourself water. The panic is settling in its too much its all too much. You hide behind a tree gulping the cool water and its heaven down your throat. It's almost magical one pill and the world is more bearable.

"I heard his niece put false charges on him. Poor man." A lady discusses

"Not only that she's going to inherit his assets." Her friends adds.

"They said her pack died in a car accident and she was the only one who survived."

"Not only that they said she doesn't have a scent."

"What a freak."

"It gives me the shivers."

Someone covered your ears. You could smell it the sweet familiar scent.

You turned. Face to face with yoongi.

"It's fine." You said gruffly removing his hands from your ears harsher then you intended to.

Your alpha awakening had given you more strength. Strength that scared you. Strength that made you even harder to kill.

The words were already branded in your brain.

"Are you ok?" He asked softly.

"Why are you here?" You asked instead. He smelled like your old bestfriend but he wasn't. It would be better to remember that. He too had a pack. Just like your soulmate. Just like everyone else except you.

"We need to talk."

"About what?... wait don't tell me... you're not my soulmate are you?" You stagger backwards clenching your fist. You want to hold him someone anyone.

"No I'm not but.."

Ofcourse he's not it can't be that simple ofcourse.

"Then there's no reason. Excuse me I have to wrap this up. People will be wondering why the chief mourner is missing."

Before you could leave Yoongi stopped you giving you his card.

"Call me if you need anything. I'll come see you later."

You don't say anything. So he leaves.

You wonder if you can have two pills quickly. You wonder if you can mention those ladies in a suicide note. Won't that be funny though you won't be there to see it.

You stare at the casket as it lowered down. You envy your uncle. Wishing you could trade places.

Would anyone cry if I disappear?

It's fine I wouldn't even know the difference once I'm dead afterall..

Everyone leaves. Some people even try to comfort you. You put on an understanding face as you tell them words they want to hear.

And thats that. You go to a convenience store nearby. Sit eating instant noodles. The noodles taste bland so you play with them more than you eat them.

What next?

The world is right infront of you. What are you even supposed to live for. The person you might have wanted revenge on is dead. You can't kill yourself after surviving your family. You have money and a house. You could go to college but studying you don't think you can do that anymore. You used to have dreams. But they seem a childish fantasy and nothing more. Even your soulmate doesn't want you. You don't blame them you wouldn't want a person like yourself. A joke of an alpha.

A can hits the noodles. And the scalding hot broth falls down your hand and lap. They seemed to have been trying to throw the can in the Dustbin right infront of where you sat. And with your terrible luck it ruined your dinner.

You instinctively stand up. Someone takes your hands pouring cold water over them.

"Are you okay?"

You look up to see the most charming face. Kind eyes, strong hands, taller than you and the scent that makes you want to dissolve in it.

"No.." Your voice is foreign to you as you reply. Tears dripping out of your eyes.

He hugs you wrapping his arms around you.

"I'm sorry I won't ever leave you alone again I promise."

Yeah so that's that. I've been away for a while. I haven't written anything but I wanted to post something.. so I did this.. If you've read belong. I'm not in the mindset to write belong currently it's way too happy for me and I can't do it justice right now.

Please let me know your thoughts!!

Taglist : @kaceypdf ; @ghostlyworld ; @thelilbutifulthings ; @hijabae2019

Permanent taglist : @exfolitae ; @cryingpages ; @outrobtsnd

#bts x reader #bts fanfic #bts au #namjoon x reader #jin x reader #bts ot7 x reader #bts angst #kim namjoon #omegaverse au #omegaverse

[greyeyedmonster-18]

(james potter and sirius black in compression shorts. yes? yes.)

#on tight ends and wide receivers #remus is literally just pulling his hair out this entire fic #and then hears the commentators say things like Coming In From the Back #and Remus is like '...please tell me yall heard that one. no? no?!?' #he just wants to write a silly little paper for his silly little grade #not be immersed into football culture and sweat over handsome boys every day #(he doesn't mind) (he's secretly thrilled) (he won the lottery)

[ancientrimer]

i can't believe this keeps happening to me. i figure out a theory i think i might want to apply in my thesis, go look at the text that has the theory, and find that that text already mentions jane eyre

#DORRIT COHN WHEN I GET YOU #i'm trying to apply discordant narration bc i'm really realising how significant the judgements of the narrative voice are #for our understanding of the story #but cohn already said that the narrator's judgement are concordant with the overall story #which obviously. it's an “autobiography” #i'm not really sure how to angle this?? #bc on the one hand it really makes sense to comment on how the narrative voice is the one that makes judgement statements most of the time #which are what one might say mostly relates to contemporary discourse #(along with pure description) #but it feels too risky bc it may start to sound like i'm saying that the narrative voice is expressing brontë's judgements #which is not what i mean at all #this is what i get for trying to write a historically contextualising thesis (not actually my thing) #narration is actually more my thing which is why i keep ending up back there #oh. that's what this is #i'm subconsciously trying to change the angle of the thesis to be about narration #fuck this is another completely separate essay isn't it #if you never hear from me again it's because i drowned in new essay ideas that can only come to fruition if i do a phd (not in my plans) #(at least not for another decade) #jag borde ha vetat att det här skulle hända

[sashimiyas]

good night guys. i’m gonna write about mattsun taking us out fishing for the first time

#reinas.inretrograde #i say this even though i just woke up from a nap #and actually have to do some schoolwork while i eat kimchi soup #but just… mattsun holding the boat stead for you #ankles deep in the water. sleepy expression bright bc you’ve woken up with him and decided to come along #where there’s a sharp contrast between your boots. his so dirty and storied with different colors of mud and gunk #and yours pristine and used for the very first time. it still has the size sticker on the left boot #and it’s quiet the whole time. you’re too tired to speak. and there’s only so many times you can comment about the scenery and the weather #but mattsun’s just happy. happy you’ve indulged his boring hobby of sitting atop a body of water with stick and string #he likes to rock the boat so he can hear you yelp when you cling to his shoulders. much similar to the ways he teases you on land #you guys play chopsticks. and then mattsun starts talking about the bio life nearby. provides you the scientific names of trees and flora #he covers his palms over your cheeks when they get too cold. and when that doesn’t work. you two share his single origin #carafe of coffee that you don’t know how to truly appreciate. that caffeine actually puts you to sleep and when you wake #the sun is already above your heads and mattsun is already making his way back to shore #and when you apologize for being lousy company compared to the grandpas he usually fishes with. mattsun just shrugs #he steps out the boat. overalls wet to the knees and he pulls it to the rocks so you can get out safely boots still clean #and he takes everything from your hands. holds the fishing rods. the lunch pack. his newspaper. his empty net and cooler on one side #so the other hand can be free to hold yours and he just says. ‘yeah but none of them are as pretty as you.’ #okay actually. i just wrote the mattsun takes you out fishing in the tags by accident #so i guess i’ll go do the other things i mentioned earlier now

[salsflore]

⠀

#cw negative #its not that bad i just need 2 rant for a bit #because like why does my mother say such ridiculous shit sometimes #i went to go wash my dish and she said ah youre finally doing the dishes .. LIKE i try to but what do i do when my brother insists on doing #it everytime ! and takes it from my hands and blocks the sink and he’ll make a big fuss if i don’t let him do it ! #like literally scold me and tell me to put it down or else he’ll get irritated #i lightheartedly told her that and then she was like well yeah you're still a woman then went on about how its the womans job to [ . . . ] #its really the small things like that i think. she has such outdated beliefs. i hear her saying things like its the womans job to take care #of the house and her man and etc and i'm like ok i Know i literally won't win if i try to do so much as nudge her #but then she also talks about other things that just irk the shit out of me !!! the rapture abortion etc #the one time she told me to my face if she couldve aborted me she would have. making comments on my body and just #i don't hate her. overall we have a good relationship. but its just these small things and her gross outdated beliefs and how gullible she #can be and stuff like that. she tells me i have such an easy life but i can't bear to tell her i was ever suicidal or ever self harmed #because i KNOW she'd tell me i'd go to hell if i ever tried to kill myself #i know this wholeee thing might be really intense and sad and stuff but i'm totally okay /gen i'm just! awfully irritated #thinking back on all those dumbass things she's said and done like. agh;; #its not her fault i think ive noticed a lot of filipina women (or at least the ones around me) tend to hold those beliefs so she was prolly #taught these as a child but . come on!! im so tired of the misogynistic shit she says and . ugh #cw self harm mention #cw suicide mention

[inkskinned]

what is with men being mad any time a woman raises her voice where did that even come from. someone posted a video of a small electrical explosion, and the top comment was of course the woman screams. the second comment is women try not to scream challenge, level impossible. i had to go back and watch the video again. there is, somewhat fainty, a little gasp emitted off-camera, more of a yelp than a scream. it is mostly lost in the crack of the explosion. afterwards, you hear her voice, shaken, say, are you okay?

i am helping one of my friends train her voice pitch lower, because she wants to be taken seriously at work. she and i do each other's nails and talk about gender roles; and how - due to our appearance - neither of us have ever been able to be "hysterical" in public. we both appear young and sweet and feminine. she is cisgender, and cannot use her natural voice in her profession because people keep saying she appears to be "vapid". we both try to figure out if our purposeful voice lowering is technically sexist. is it promoting something when you are a victim to it?

a storm almost sends a pole through a car window. in the dashcam, you can hear the woman passenger say her partner's name twice, crying out in alarm. she sounds terrified. in the comments, she is lambasted for her lack of calm. how is that even fucking helping?

in high school, i taught myself to have a lower voice. i had been recorded when i was genuinely (and righteously) upset; and i hated how my voice sounded on the phone speakers when it was played back. i was defending my mom, and my voice cracked with emotion. it meant i was no longer winning the argument: i was just shrieking about it.

girls meet each other after a long summer and let out a little joyful scream. this usually stops around 12-14, because people will not tolerate this display of affection (as it has the effect of being passingly annoying). something about the fact that little girls can't ever even be annoying. we are trained to examine each part of our lives (even joy) for anything that could make us upsetting and disgusting. they act like teenage girls are breaking into houses and shrieking you awake at 3 in the morning. speaking as a public school educator: trust me, it's not that bad, you can just roll your eyes and move on. it does not compare to the ways boys end up being annoying: slurs in graffiti, purposefully mocking your body, following you after you said no. you know, just boy things.

there's another video of a man who is not allowed to yell in the house, so he snaps his fingers when he's excited about soccer. the comments are full of angry men, talking about how their brother is unfairly caged. let him express himself and this is terrible to do to someone. eventually the couple has to address it in a second video: they are married with a newborn baby. he was trying not to wake the infant up. there is no comment on the fact women are not allowed to yell indoors. or the fact that it could have been really alarming or triggering for his wife. sometimes i wonder if straight men even like women, if they even enjoy being in relationships with them.

for the longest time, i hated roller coasters because it always felt inappropriate and uncomfortable for me to scream. one of my friends called me on it, said it was unusual i'm so unwilling. i had to go to my therapist about it. i don't like to scream because i was not raised in a safe situation, and raising my voice would have brought unsafe attention towards me. even when i am supposed to scream, it feels shameful, guilty. i was not treated kindly, so i lack a basic form of self-protection. this is not a natural response. it is not good that in a situation of high adrenaline - i shut up about it.

something very bad is happening, i think. in between all the beauty standards and the stuff i've already discussed - this one feels new and cruel in a way i can't quite express. yes, it's scary and silencing. but there's something about how direct it is - that so many men agree with the sentiment that women should never yell, even in an emergency - it feels different.

is the word shriek gendered automatically? how about shrill or screech? in self defense class, one of the first things they tell you is to yell, as loud and as shrilly as you can. they say it will feel rude. most women will not do this. you need to practice overcoming the social pressure and just scream.

most women do not cry out, even when it's bad. we do not report it. we walk faster. we do not make a scene. what would be the point of doing anything else? no matter what we do, we don't get taken seriously. it is a joke to them. an instagram caption punchline. we have to present ourselves as silent, beautiful, captivating - "valuable."

a woman is outside watching her kids when someone throws a firecracker at them. she screams and runs towards her children. in the comments, grown men flock together in the thousands: god. women are so annoying.

#warm up #writeblr #this one has bothered me for a bit #any time a woman does something even passingly annoying we treat it like a fucking crime #hey man. women are allowed to be annoying. everyone forever is allowed to be passingly annoying #as long as they aren't hurting anyone/thing #like u wanna know something? i find it super annoying that men don't wear seatbelts #why arent there thousands of comments on driving videos thats just like : men try not to die in a car crash challenge #''this briefly annoyed me''. okay??????? AND????????????????? go get ur self a cookie and calm down about it #ur not entitled to control other ppl's experiences and emotions just so u can maintain ur own peace #if being briefly annoyed ruins ur whole day! you! need! therapy!!!! #men try not to become immediately angry about nothing challenge: level impossible #ps author is nonbinary. we didn't even get into the gender presentation thing #the fact men think it's SEXY that my voice is on the lower end....