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we-are-so-close · 1 year

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Saturday Afternoons

Asahi x fem!reader word count: 1.8k warnings: Asahi and reader have a son named Hitoshi (Toshi), use of mommy and daddy in the paternal sense, one suggestive use of "daddy" from reader author's note: feeling self indulgent

Quiet Saturdays were days you loved and loathed. On one hand, you were able to run errands, get things done around the house, and just have some “me” time. On the other hand, you missed being around your favorite boys. This Saturday in particular was a “Daddy/Toshi Day”; a day for your boys to spend doing whatever they liked. But you couldn’t complain too much, as most other Saturdays were days you spent with either one of them or both of them.

You were laying on the couch reading a book when you heard the front door open and close in the only way your child knows how. Soft, socked pitter-patters littered the hallway, growing louder with each step.

“Mommy? MOMMY! We’re home! Mooommmmyyy. Mom-Oh, there you are, mommy!” he exclaimed as he ran over to the couch and launched himself on top of you.

“Hi, Toshi. Did you have a nice, fun day with Daddy?” you asked as you squeezed him tightly.

“Oh, Mommy,” he sighed as he flung himself dramatically back onto the couch. Appearance wise, he was Asahi’s clone. But, personality wise? He was more animated and dramatic than both you and Asahi combined. But still, he was an angel of a child and he never ceased to amaze you.

“Let me tell you all about the day I’ve had.” He crossed his legs up under himself, folded his hands in his lap, and stared at you with big eyes. You mimicked his movements and sat patiently.

“First, Daddy and I went to breakfast. But we had to go to a new place. And, Mommy, I can’t believe it, but they didn’t have any waffles!”

“Oh no! Those are your favorites!”

“I was a little sad. But Daddy said that pancakes are just as yummy. He told me that they’re your favorites, so I wanted to try them, too. And guess what, Mommy,” he said with a serious tone.

“What, Toshi?”

“They put chocolate chips in there. Chocolate chips in the pancakes! Did you know they could do that?” his little voice was full of excitement. “Daddy even let me pour the syrup on myself! And I accidentally poured a lot on it.”

“Oh, wow! Were they still super yummy?”

“Yep! Super duper yummy! I tried to give Daddy a bite, but he just kept drinking his coffee,” he said as he made a disgusted face.

You quirked an eyebrow. “Oh? Was that the only thing he had for breakfast?”

“Mhmm!” a stern look replaced the disgusted look.

“Hm, Mommy’s gonna have to talk to Daddy about that.”

His eyes got big, his eyebrows lifted almost to his hairline. “Is Daddy in trouble?” his voice was just above a whisper.

“Of course not, honey. Everyone needs to eat a good breakfast,” you smiled softly at the child and a look of relief washed over him.

“What did you do after breakfast?”

“We walked around for a long time looking at stuff in stores, but we didn’t get anything. Oh! We went to see a movie! I got a large popcorn and a large Sprite! And Daddy shared with me.”

“Mmm. What was the movie about?”

He went on and on in great detail about the movie. There was a really fun song and maybe you could download it so that you guys could listen to it. He told you about his favorite part of the movie and how he had to hold Daddy’s hand for a scary part. He loved how dark the movie theater was during the movie, but when the lights came back on after it was over how much it hurt his eyes.

“And sometimes, Daddy would check his phone and that hurt my eyes, too.”

“Tsk, tsk. Daddy knows better than to be on his phone during a movie.”

“It’s okay, Mommy. I think it was important. Cuz we had to go to his work for a little bit.”

That comment turned your smile into a grimace. There was a long-standing rule for Saturdays - No Work, period. This also crossed a line for you, because you didn’t like the idea of Hitoshi being around the people Asahi worked with. Some of the people were fine, but the models always rubbed you the wrong way.

“It was boring. I did get to sit in a big, comfy chair and watch Daddy work. Does Daddy dress you like he does the ladies at work?”

You chuckled, “No, buddy. I dress myself.”

He scrunched his little face. “Then why was Daddy helping them? Is it cuz they can’t dress themselves? That’s silly. How could they not know that!” He hummed to himself, but continued on.

“Some of the girls kept rubbing my hair and telling me I’m cute. I told them that I know, my mommy tells me all of the time!” He stated this matter-of-factly.

“You are the cutest person I know.” You pulled him into a hug and kissed his forehead.

“You’re the prettiest person I know. I even told all of those girls that you were. And then they left and had to practice walking. First they need help gettin’ dressed and then they need help walking? I think they need to go back to school.”

You laughed at his insight. He was a bright little boy.

“Did you and Daddy do anything else?”

“Yeah! Daddy got me some ice cream for helping him at work! He let me have the biggest bowl and I got hot fudge and sprinkles. I wanted to bring you some too, but DAddy said it would melt,” he got visibly sad at this remark. “Mommy, I wish you could have come with us today. Daddy and I missed you a lot!” He jumped into your arms and snuggled against your chest. His love filled your heart to the brim.

“I’ve missed you too, buddy. It sounds like you had a fun day. But, I think it’s time for a healthy snack and time to rest your brain.”

“But, my brain isn’t sleepy!” He began to protest.

“Hitoshi, my love, you’ve had a busy day. Your brain needs a little rest. You have to rest for one hour and then you can come out. Then, I’ll make dinner. What would you like?” You picked him up and carried him into the kitchen.

“Noodles! Noodles! Noodles!” he chanted out.

“Okay, noodles it is,” you chuckled. “How about for snack? We have apples, strawberries, carrots, or celery.”

“Hm, how many do I have ta eat?”

You narrowed your eyes at your little negotiator and said, “just pick one and then we’ll decide.”

He chose carrots, and you placed a handful of them into a cup for him to snack on. You hoisted him up onto the counter where he ate the vegetables without complaint. He drank the water and let out a contented sigh.

“C’mon, buddy. I’ll give you a piggyback ride to your room,” you squatted down in front of him and he climbed onto your back.

“Wait, I need to tell Daddy something.”

You trotted around the house looking for Asahi. But now that you thought of it, you didn’t hear him come in. You went to peek outside and found him still by the car on the phone. Your child nudged you further.

“It looks like Daddy’s busy, bud.”

“Mommy, it’s very important.”

Whether it was important or not to you, it didn’t matter. It was important to Hitoshi, and whatever Asahi was talking about could wait for the time being. Asahi saw you walking up to him and his face lit up. He said something into his phone and put it into his pocket.

“Hi,” he whispered as he kissed your forehead.

“My love, Hitoshi has something important to tell you.” You turned so that your son could look at his father.

“Daddy,” the sassy six year old started.

“Buddy,” Asahi replied.

“You’re the best. I love you!”

Asahi smiled softly. He took the boy in his arms and hugged him. He whispered something into Hitoshi’s ear and your son smiled wide and whispered a loud “yeah!”. Both of them looked at you and ambushed you in a group hug. Both of them kissed either side of your face over and over, and it caused you to go into a giggle fit.

“Toshi, guess what?” Asahi asked your son.

“What!” the boy shouted excitedly.

“Daddy is so lucky to have you and Mommy in his life.” He smiled at you and your heart fluttered.

“Hitoshi, it’s time to go rest now,” you gently reminded him.

“Oh yea. We’re having noodles for dinner!”

“Mhmm. And the sooner you go rest your brain, the sooner you’ll be to having noodles.”

His eyes got big at the sudden realization. He tried to wiggle out of Asahi’s arms to no avail.

“C’mon, Daddy! Let’s go rest our brains! We’ve had a big day and need our rest!” He tried to convince his father into letting him go. The three of you walked into the house.

“You go ahead, Toshi. I need to talk to Mommy for a few minutes.”

The little boy hurried off toward his room, the promise of noodles fueling his desire to rest.

“Busy day, huh?” you asked with an eyebrow quirked.

“He tell you everything?”

“Yep.”

Asahi looked at you with guilt in his eyes. He pulled you in for a hug, his head rested on your shoulder.

“I’m sorry, I tried to get them to get someone else to come in. But the photo shoot was pushed up several days and they needed me. I should have let you know before I took him with me,” he sighed. “We have a really great kid, you know that?”

“He must take after his dad,” you smirked.

He shook his head, “No, he definitely takes after you.”

You smiled. “Agree to disagree. Although, what do you think about having another mini you running around? I wouldn’t mind one,” you combed your fingers through his hair. He pulled back to look at you, his eyes scanning your face.

“D-do you mean that?”

“Yes, daddy,” you smiled deviously and gave a playful poke.

Asahi’s face turned bright red. He leaned in to kiss you, wiping the grin off of your face. He deepened the kiss, one hand holding the back of your head, his other hand on the small of your back pulling you closer into him. The creak of a door and a tiny voice broke both of you off of each other.

“Mommy, will you snuggle with me so my brain can rest better?”

You smiled at Asahi. “Be right there, buddy,” you called back to Hitoshi.

“To be continued,” Asahi said before kissing you on the forehead.

“I’m holding you to that,” you blow him a kiss as you walk down the hallway.

As much as the idea of having another mini him running around was endearing, the idea of having a mini you running around made his heart soar even more.

#asahi x fem!reader #azumane asahi x fem!reader #asahi x reader #azumane asahi x reader #cw parenthood #asahi #azumane asahi #this is like my dream scenario #i'm boring i know #but i yearn for a simple life with the man i love

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plus-size-reader · 2 years

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Safe

Din Djarin x Plus size!reader

Word Count: 2670 words

Warnings: none

Summary: Mando needs help taking care of the child, a job perfectly suited for you.

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Someone had to watch him.

If Mando and Cara Dune were going to go back to Nevarro to take out the imperial force that had made itself known there, they couldn’t have the kid just tagging along, messing around as he often did.

He was bound to get himself into trouble, and as harmless as it usually was, Din didn’t have time to keep cleaning up after him on top of everything else.

Lucky for him, the Mandalorian knew just the person to keep an eye on him.

If there was anyone in the entire galaxy that would be willing to stop what they were doing to look after a child like Grogu, it was you.

You weren’t a fighter.

You never had been.

In fact, you really had no business being involved with the Mandalorian at all but that didn’t change the facts. You two had run into one another in a market on your homeplanet, and you’d offered to make him dinner.

Under any normal circumstances, he would have refused but there was just something in your soft, caring nature that drew him in, as foreign as it was to him.

It was that same caring, soft nature that made you the perfect person for this.

You were a great friend to Mando, and that made you a great friend to the kid, at far as he was concerned.

There was no avoiding it.

If there was anyone anywhere he trusted to watch over the child, it was you.

You would be perfectly safe, with Kuiil and IG-11 keeping a close eye on you, but Mando had made himself clear. He didn’t want that droid going anywhere near the kid, which meant that you were on babysitting detail.

Which, to be completely fair, was fine by you.

Where you were from, your sole responsibility in the community was to watch over the younglings in your town and make sure that they were taken care of. Compared to all of them, a single kid was going to be a walk in the park.

Or so you thought.

You told Mando that you would be glad to watch the young one without hesitation but you didn’t really have any idea what you were up against yet.

Eventually you would learn, as he’d learned, that there was nothing else quite like the kid in the entire cosmos.

There was no way you could have ever been prepared for what he had in store for you, not even with all of your experience.

Somehow everywhere they went, he found a way to get into trouble, no matter the circumstances and Mando didn’t see why this would be any different.

If anything, the introduction to another person was likely to force him to misbehave that much more.

Still, you had every confidence that you could handle the little thing.

Grogu was only a child, after all.

“He’s harder to look after than he looks, trust me” the Mandalorian hummed, his usual monotone gone for a moment as he let himself express the clear fondness he felt for the tiny being.

Perhaps it was because he was only a child, or because he was in a position to be the most valuable, and vulnerable asset he’d ever come across.

Whatever it was, one thing was for certain, it was bringing something out of Mando you had never seen before.

Whenever you had crossed paths before, it was all about how many credits he could make or getting the job done for the guild.

Never did you imagine him being so paternal to a creature, let alone stealing one and completely giving up the only real world he’d ever known.

...But that didn’t change the fact that he was here, protecting Grogu as if he were his own.

It brought a smile to your face, one you didn’t even bother to hide from the notoriously stone faced Mandalorian. He was strong and reserved, but you never had been.

That was part of the charm that you had always had.

You weren’t like him, and you never had been.

Every time that you two were together, whether it be for work related information or just to catch up when Mando was in the area, you were as light and soft as you’d always been.

“I don’t think I believe that, I think we’ll get along just fine” you teased, allowing yourself to gently tap the child’s small nose, earning a coo from him that told you that you may have had a point.

At that, you felt your pride bolster even more, the look on your face proving to Din that you were right.

As difficult as taking care of the child had been for him, Mando did have a reason he brought you in on this in the first place.

You were far more parental than he’d ever been in his life. Still, you understood the Mandalorian creed just as he did, until he could find out where this little guy belonged, he was basically its father.

There was no chance of getting out of that.

Just like there was no chance of getting your finger out of the death grip the tiny creature currently had on your finger, which he’d snagged shortly after it made contact with his nose.

“That’s exactly why I brought him to you, you can get into trouble together” his modulated voice prompted, that same edge of fondness in his tone as before, even given the less than savory cause for their visit.

After the way Mando had left Nevarro the first time, you seriously doubted you would ever see him again, but as there always was, there was money to be made by the bad guys, taking out worse guys.

That was just how this little corner of the galaxy ran, and you weren’t in a place to argue that.

All you could really do was be glad that you made a friend out of one of the most earnest bad guys around, and do all you could to make sure it stayed that way.

Deep down, you knew that Mando was a good guy, as far as bed guys went.

“We can’t get in trouble if we aren’t caught, Mando, you know that” you grinned, taking the bundle into your arms as gently as you could, giving Din’s hand a gentle squeeze as you pulled away.

You knew that he was really protective over the child, but it did make you feel good to know he trusted you with him. As hard as this was, Mando knew that the kid was in good hands.

After all, that trust had taken a long time to build.

Din wasn’t the kind of man who gave away his trust openly, but that didn’t mean that it wasn't worth it to take the time to become close enough to gain it.

The thing about the Mandalorian was that once you had that trust, it was never going away.

He had so few allies, he couldn’t afford to lose those he’d already made.

“You always say that, and yet, there’s always trouble regardless” Din countered, thinking back to all those times you had promised to behave yourself and he still had to get you both out of some pretty sticky situations.

That kind of thing just followed you around.

You couldn’t help it.

“You may be right, but I don’t see how that’s my fault” you shrugged, a single huff of agreement leaving the child at the perfect time, though you were sure it was more of a happy toddle than anything else.

You could definitely tell that he was a smart little thing but he didn’t seem to understand your words, or Mando’s for that matter.

While he would certainly grow to understand them in time, that was still a long while off yet.

“You wouldn’t” he mumbled, earning quite the glare from you for only a moment before he moved on entirely.

Mando liked poking fun at you as much as the next guy, but it was all in good fun and he would never insult you, especially not when there was so much work to be done.

Work that he needed to get back to.

This wasn’t just a social visit after all, and the Mandalorian had things he needed to do before he could catch up with you.

“The two of you will be okay alone, I assume?” he checked, giving you and the child one final once over before heading out, just to make sure. Din had every confidence that you could do this for him, but it didn’t make him any less wary of the danger.

There was no telling who could be out there, right now, just waiting for him to step away from you and the child.

Not that worrying would lessen the danger any.

The danger would always be there, and while you two were as safe as kittens with him, he couldn’t be by your side all hours of the day.

The best he could do was handle his business and get back here as soon as possible.

“I can handle a toddler Mando, he’ll be safe with me” you assured, watching as the child gave him a small wave in goodbye as he turned toward the door.

Neither of them really wanted to part, something that was clear to you, and while it warms your heart, it wasn’t necessary.

They would be back together again in a matter of hours.

“And you’ll be safe?” he called, catching your attention at the last minute, his words barely registering as he headed for the mouth of the ship.

At first, you weren’t even sure if he meant for you to hear it, it was so strange coming from him. Din had never been so outwardly affectionate with you before, not in all the time you’d known one another.

Still, there was no denying the truth.

The Mandalorian was concerned about you.

At the end of the day, he knew that the fondness he felt for you may have been more than either of you intended to make it, but that wasn’t going to change the fact that he did care about you, and routinely worried about something happening that he couldn’t control.

The idea of any harm coming to you, especially while doing a favor to him, was one that filled him with great dread.

“I’ll be safe. Just come back in one piece to pick up the kid” you called back, rocking the child back and forth absently on your hip.

You liked the kid.

Of course, Mando wasn’t kidding when he suggested that it would be more work than you initially thought to look after him but it wasn’t too bad. Sure, you felt like you’d been chasing the toddler around the Razor Crest for hours, but what else was new?

In your experience, children all reacted the same way when given free rein, no matter the species.

...and in that way, Grogu was certainly a typical child.

Not that Din was completely wrong either.

Even given as determined as you were to be right, you had to admit that the child was more of a handful than you could have prepared yourself for.

He was messy, and about as full of energy as you’d ever seen in all your life, but what really blew your mind was how much Grogu could eat.

Every time you turned around, it just seemed like he was finding something brand new to put in his mouth.

It was really starting to get to you.

“No, you can’t eat that” you tutted, rushing to reach out and take a discarded piece of what looked like foil from his hands, closed tightly around the object of his desire.

If you’d caught him any later, you knew for a fact that he would have surely swallowed it but just as you were about to panic over everything he’d been trying to stuff into his mouth this entire time, The Mandalorian showed up to save the day.

As he so often did.

“I told you he was trouble” he decided, that I-told-you-so tone in his voice that you couldn’t have missed it you tried, no matter how modulated it may have been.

“He’s definitely a bit of a handful, that’s for sure” you allowed, catching sight of Din as he turned toward the mouth of the ship.

To him, it seemed obvious.

You were the most capable person for the job, and he wouldn’t have dared ask another person for a favor like this but deep down, Mando knew what he was asking of you.

He knew first hand just how challenging watching the child could be, and while it wasn’t exactly a cake walk, he knew that you could keep him out of danger, even if you couldn’t exactly keep him out of trouble.

“Perhaps I should have warned you about his appetite” Din hummed, and for a second, you thought you may have even heard a hint of a chuckle on the tail end of his words.

He really was fond of this little creature.

“I figured that out soon enough” you smiled, picking up the child and handing him over to the Mandalorian, who graciously accepted the gesture.

The pair hadn’t been separated for all that long but Mando was finding it more and more difficult to be away from him every time it happened.

After all, anything could have happened to the kid in his absence and that wasn’t really a risk he was willing to take.

Not with him and not with you.

That was why it was so fortunate that you managed to stay safe here while he did what had to be done.

Mando knew for a fact that he wouldn’t be able to lose either of you, let alone both of you at the same time.

“I should have assumed you would. You’ve always been clever that way” he shrugged, allowing Grogu to grab hold of one of his gloved fingers, similarly to how he’d done with you when you first met.

Evidently it was a sign of affection for the kid.

...and it wasn’t the only one.

“You’re just lucky you got back in one piece” you scoffed, catching sight of a new dent in his beskar chestplate that wasn’t there before.

It was tarnished, from a blaster, and far too close to what little of his skin wasn’t protected by armor.

He could have gotten himself killed if he wasn’t careful, and you had to admit the idea was less than comforting.

The Mandalorian nodded, little more than a soft sigh leaving his lips as he considered what you’d said.

It was funny, he always considered how he’d feel if something happened to you, or if you got hurt, but it was rare he thought about it the other way around.

He’d never really thought about you worrying about him before but it was only natural that you did.

Din didn’t exactly have an easygoing job, after all.

“For all of us” he added, giving you a gentle nudge with his hand that was connected with the child’s still, so that you could join in on the little charade they’d taken to.

It was clear that the two of you had bonded quite a bit in the Mandalorian’s absence and since the kid had taken so well to you, perhaps you could stay with them for a little while.

It wouldn’t hurt to explore the idea.

After all, Mando definitely could use the help around the ship with the kid and it would be a lie to say that he was ready to let you leave so soon.

He’d only just gotten you back, after all this time, and he was almost looking forward to getting to spend some time with you.

It wasn’t something he got to do often, and that was starting to feel like a real shame.

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sourcherryandsprinkles · 3 years

Text

Father, dear father | JJ Maybank x Reader

Summary: JJ always sees his dad when he least expects it

Pairing: JJ Maybank x Reader

Word count: 1096

Warning: Mention of violence/abuse

The rumbling of a motorbike resonated outside the chateau as you were piling up empty beer cans into a trash bag to busy yourself - and stop thinking about John B's death penalty sentence. You raised your head up, eyes on the door, knowing who was about to walk in.

''Where were you?''

''I went to see John B,'' JJ replied, the screen door flapping shut behind him. ''Orange doesn't suit him.'' If ithad simply been a joke, you would've laughed, but you knew JJ enough to see through his joke that it was a way to camouflage the emotions he was feeling.

''We're gonna get him out of there,'' you promised.

JJ looked down, nodding. ''I...I saw my dad too.''

You stilled at the mention of the one-who-shall-not-be-named. You hadn't heard from him since the day JJ stole the Phantom. You also hadn't seen his face at the gas station - which you work at - where he usually bought his beer and liquor in a long time.

''I saw him at the prison. He was with other inmates...as in, he is in jail.''

Good. Luke Maybank deserved to rot behind bars of a jail-cell until his last breath for all the shit he did to JJ. He was a thief, drug addict, a drunk and a shitty fucking father.

JJ opened his mouth, but was struggling to get words out. His eyebrows furrowed and water blurred his vision. ''Plumb said I'm gonna end up in jail just like my dad.''

His head hung low and your face twisted into anger. You weren't a violent person, but you wanted to punch her.

JJ had caused a lot of trouble around the island and made himself a name to the local cops. The Pogues often joked that JJ was going to go in jail one day if he kept being so reckless and stupid, but it was all jokes.

Plumb wanted to hurt JJ, she meant those words.

You refused to let him believe her.

Dropping what you had in your hands, you crossed the living room and held JJ's face so he'd look at you. ''You are not your dad, JJ. You're nothing like the shit-head, okay?'' You didn't miss the tears in his eyes as you spoke sternly yet gently. You wanted your words to stick and erase Plumb's. ''You're loving, brave and loyal. You're always looking out for me and your friends, always defending us at any turn. You're all those things your dad will never be.''

You felt his arms wrapping around your middle and you put yours around his neck and shoulders, allowing him to lay his head on your shoulder. JJ's hold was tight, but not so tight you couldn't breathe. You kissed the side of his neck and felt him smile.

When he pulled back, you searched his eyes for signs of tears and wiped it for him. ''You okay?''

JJ nodded. ''Yeah. I just had dust in my eye.''

You rolled your eyes at his bullshit.

He walked back you, heading to the kitchen, and you only now noticed his white shirt - its cuffed sleeves showing his toned arms - and snapback and fucking blue jeans. JJ never wore jeans. He was always in khaki shorts.

Your eyes followed him up and down with thirst. ''Since when do you wear jeans? Did you run out of clothes to wear and stole them from Pope?''

''I had to dress up to see my best friend. It's a special occasion, you know,'' he explained, closing the fridge and cracking open a beer. ''I had sunglasses too. Just wait for the full look.'' JJ put the aviators back on and- Christ.

''Honestly, I don't know if I want you to keep it on or take it off.''

JJ's lips curled at the corner, forgetting about the beer and setting it down. ''I'll make that decision for you.''

You heard a honk and looked ahead, seeing Kiara's dad's truck. Fucking finally.

''Oh, and speak of the freaking devil. Look who it is, the tortoise and the tortoise, just a couple hours late,'' John B pointed out, perched on top of the twinkie.

The van had water to its third by now and you had gotten attacked by an alligator - well, John B did.

''Where the hell were you, guys?'' Pope asked.

''Paternal complications,'' Kie briefly explained.

JJ got out of the truck and went to the trunk, grabbing the rope. ''Luke was at the chateau.''

You frowned. What the fuck was he doing at the chateau? Wasn't he in prison? You didn't say anything in front of the others as they didn't know JJ's dad was in prison.

Later, when it was only you and JJ, you decided to ask.

''How come was Luke at the chateau?''

''He was released for good behavior.'' JJ laughed dryly, having difficulty believing it. ''He busted a window in a pharmacy and stole from the pharmacist so the cops were after him. He hid at the chateau and waited for me so I could help him get out of the island - for good.''

Like always, JJ left some parts out. He didn't tell you the part where Luke had grabbed him from the back, hand over his mouth, as if he was going to kidnap him. Or, that he yelled at him and shook him. Or that he played with his feelings and head.

''H-he's not gonna come back, Y/N. I'm never gonna see him again.''

While it was mostly good that his dad was gone, a part of JJ was sad. He was still his dad.

''Now, all I have is you and the Pogues.'' His voice cracked and you reached out and took his hand, holding it between yours.

It pained you to see him like this. Hopefully, it was the last time Luke was causing his son pain.

''You'll always have me, J.'' You were still young and honestly didn’t know if you’d be together forever, but, at the moment, leaving wasn't in your future plans.

''It was hard watching him leave. Despite all the bad things he did, I love him, you know, in a weird twisted way.''

His old man didn't deserve JJ's love - not even a small part. All his life JJ wished to have a good relationship with his father. He forgave him over and over again; he was always hopeful that one day he'll stop taking drugs and drinking and abusing him. But he never did.

''You’re allowed to love him...even if just a little bit.''

''I shouldn’t.''

#jj maybank #jj maybank x oc #jj maybank fic #jj maybank x reader #Outer Banks #outer banks fic #keep sending prompts #obx #obx prompt

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homosexuality-at-its-finest · 3 years

Note

Thanks for answering my last ask about the requests! 🥰

If possible I'd like to request something: male reader is Steve Roger's adopted son (adopted after he came back from being frozen lmao) and the reader is secretly dating Peter Parker!

I don't know if it's too specific or too complicated, but I was imagining something like: reader is like an avenger too. He doesn't have powers but has fighting skills and is a very sneaky and swift fighter much like Black Widow. He fights occasionally but his father is always hesitant on letting him participate in highly dangerous missions, he's very protective of his son. That would all just be like background information just give the story some base, but the plot itself i was thinking was just about Steve discovering his son is dating Peter - and, with that, discovering reader is gay - and he gets protective, possibly interrogates Peter and stuff like that. Obviously very fluffy at the end with everyone happy but I guess you can just work on it how you think it's best! If it's too vague or too complex I can try to rewrite the request if you'd like ☺️

Maybe Steve discovers that during a mission! I think that would be interesting - if you like it of course!

Plot: Requested

Pairing: Steve Rogers & Son reader + Peter Parker x Male reader

Y/n: Your name

N/n: Nickname

H/c: Hair color

Warnings: Fighting, cursing, blood, protective dad TM Steve, character injury, coming out, supportive Steve, adopted reader, fluff, slight angst, kinda Steve’s POV

Word count: 1236

Being the son of Steve Rodger’s, aka Captain America had never been an easy feat. He had adopted Y/n after he got out of the ice, needing someone to have in the complete mystery the world was to him. He immediately loved the spunky boy, who was outspoken and reminded him of his younger self.

On many occasions’ Y/n came home with bruises littering his body, but a boyish smile adorned on his lips. The boy just seemed to find trouble without even trying, so Steve decided to teach his son how to fight. It was quite a surprise when Y/n was a complete natural, able to take his father down after a few weeks of training.

The teenage boy’s confidence only seemed to grow with training and fighting, and much to Steve’s displeasure his son ended up joining the avengers. It was one of the only times the father and son argued, going from screaming at each other to the silent treatment for days.

Steve had to admit, his son could kick some serious ass, even beating Clint during a spar, leaving the assassin on the mat groaning in pain and eventually tapping out. Then came in Peter parker, in all his geeky glory, immediately drawing his son’s attention. Steve was hesitant about the boy; he didn’t want Peter causing more trouble for Y/n in the long run.

The father couldn’t deny that his son seemed happier when Peter came into his life, spending most of his time with the young genius and his friends. It was like a moth to a flame, Y/n gravitated towards the boy in a way Steve couldn’t place a word to. If he didn’t know any better, he’d think his son was enamored with Parker. He promptly reminded himself that his son wasn’t gay (There was no issue if he was though) Steve just assumed his son would tell him if that was the case.

That belief was completely changed on a mission though, Y/n and Peter accompanied the team, taking down one of the last HYDRA bases that was left. He had to admit that the kids were holding up well, he could see his son flying around, adorned in all black, including the black mechanical wings on his back. Y/n had made those himself, claiming that they needed more air support than just Tony, Rhodey and Sam.

Every time Steve watched Y/n fly around he felt his heart jump out of his chest, he knew his son could handle himself, but damn it, it was a paternal instinct. “How are we looking up there?” Steve called over the comms, watching as the three flying beings fought off any air support, and diving down to help when needed.

“Well pops judging by the fact that we’re all heading towards the ground for support I’d day good.” Came his sons sarcastic reply, and Steve had to hold back a small smirk. Usually, he’d reprimand someone for talking like that, but Y/n was a special case.

“N/n could you head my way, kinda getting swamped over here.” Parker’s high pitched and young voice rang through the comms, and Steve watched as his beloved son took off once more. He could hear the two young superhero’s grunting and making banter back and forth over the comms as the fight continued.

What took the captain off guard was the sound of his son crying out in pain and the panicked sound of Peter calling out “Y/n!” It felt like someone had grabbed his heart and ripped it out of his chest as he heard Peter call “We have an agent down! Y/n’s down!” Never in Steve’s many years of life did he move as fast as he was right now. Anyone who got in his was down before they could even raise their weapon.

When he saw Peter cradling Y/n against his chest, fingers brushing through his son’s H/c hair, the panic only worsened. The mask Y/n wore was ripped off, lying on the ground beside him; and Steve could clearly see the blood leaking from his son’s side.

As the super soldier got closer, he could hear Peter rambling quietly. “It’s okay baby, I know it hurts.” The teenagers voice sounded so broken; it made his chest tighten even more. “Your dads coming and then we’ll get you to med bay, you’ll be good as new.” He reassured Y/n. Steve couldn’t even bring himself to care when Peter leaned down and pressed a kiss to Y/n’s lips, giving the other boy a tight smile.

From there everything felt like a blur, Steve carried Y/n to the jet and next thing he knew his son was in recovery, a tired smile on his face as Steve entered the room. “Hey pops.” Y/n’s voice sounded so tired and strained, it made Steve want to break down and cry.

“Hey kiddo, how’re you feeling?” He questioned, sitting in the chair beside his son’s bed, immediately holding his hand. “Like I got shot twice.” Y/n deadpanned, giving his father a cheeky grin. Steve huffed out a tired laugh, eyes running over his son’s bruised body. “Yeah, yeah that makes sense.” The soldier chuckled lightly, giving Y/n’s hand a squeeze. The two sat in comfortable silence for a few moments, the only sound in the room was the rhythmic beeps of the heart monitor. After a few moments of psyching himself up, Steve spoke.

“So, you and Parker huh?” He kept his voice light, eyebrows furrowed slightly. His son’s cheeks flushed, looking away from his father. “Oh, uh yeah.” He could hear the beeping increase slightly. “Why didn’t you tell me kiddo?” He questioned, feeling a bit hurt that his son had kept something so important from him.

“I didn’t know how you’d react, being from the 40’s and all...” Y/n trailed off, eyebrows furrowed a bit. Steve felt his stomach twist a bit. Y/n was scared he wouldn’t accept him being gay? “Oh sweetheart, I don’t care if you’re gay, I love you no matter what, you’re still my baby boy.”

The smile Y/n gave him put the sun to shame, making a smile spread across his own lips. “How long have you and Peter been together?” He questioned lightly, his thumb brushing over the teenagers’ knuckles. “6 months.” Y/n replied shyly, flush darkening under his father’s questioning. That continued for about an hour before Peter entered the room, and immediately the protective dad mode came out.

“So, Parker what are your intentions with my son?” Y/n let out an indignant sound, slapping his dads’ arm. Peter’s entire face flushed bright red, looking like a deer caught in headlights. “T-to make him happy, sir.” Came Peter’s shy reply, glancing over at his boyfriend for help.

“Pops, seriously? Leave him alone.” Y/n gave his father an annoyed look, making Steve shrink back slightly, his kid was slightly terrifying, okay? The father watched as the two boys interacted, watching them for a few moments, before excusing himself from the room. If he came back later and the two were curled up in bed together asleep, well he wasn’t going to say anything.

#marvel #avengers #mcu #Steve rogers #Peter parker #steve rogers x reader #Steve rogers x male reader #Peter Parker x reader #Peter Parker x male reader #marvel x reader #marvel x male reader #avengers x reader #avengers x male reader #mcu x reader #mcu x male reader

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rcksmith · 3 years

Text

Spring breeze — Spencer Reid

Sumarry: Spencer never thought about falling in love with someone, but he certainly didn't expect that he would fall in love with Gideon's daughter. — season 3 —

Part.2 Part.3 Part.4

A/N: I am marathoning Criminal Minds again and I can not express how much I loved the interaction of Gideon and Spencer!! So this idea came as an epiphany, and I love the conception of love at first sight. Maybe this becomes a serie...

English is not my first language, so I so sorry if have a mistake.

Requests are open. Love you ❤️

Couple:Spencer Reid/Gideon's daughter!reader.

Warnings: nothing, just very fluff.

— — — — —

Something was different. Maybe it was the way the sun's rays cascaded down in an atypical way, maybe it was the breeze that carried a more lyrical intonation on its back, or maybe it was just the Earth that was adorned by an ethereal veil. Spencer didn't know how to point out what was really different, but he felt in his soul that something in the hemisphere had changed.

At first, when he took the subway to work, Spencer thought it was just an ephemeral sensation, just like those seconds when you feel the breath of the breeze more cold. But it didn't. The sensation accompanied him to work, to the plane, to the case, it stuck to him like a tattoo and Reid found himself looking around for answers that did not exist physically.

He considered all the theories that were possible to explain that destabilization in his subtly balanced world. But he found none.

“Are you feeling anything different today?” That's what he asked Morgan.

Derek shrugged, finishing packing up at the police station so they could go back to Quantico.

“No.” Then he looked Reid whit his obsidian eyes “Is something bothering you? Is the Genie feeling any peturbation in the Force? ”

Spencer chuckled through his nose at the Star Wars joke, but just shook his head in a 'No'. And the conversation died there. How could he explain something that even he didn't understand?

Trying to ignore the way his heart was beating fast, for no reason, in anticipation of something Spencer himself was unaware of, he wondered how long he was going to have that sensation. The feeling of euphoria, the taste of something, there was something exciting in the air, almost angelic.

But how long was that going to accompany him? One day? One week? Whole life? For the first time, Spencer didn't have the answer. And that was disconcerting.

When BAU's glass doors opened for agents to settle on their desks and Hotch and Gideon go to their respective offeces, a wave of icy breeze from the DC air reverberated through the enclosure. Spencer can see that Morgan shrugged in the wind, Emily looke for a coat in the black suitcase, but his own body didn't seem to be hit by the same breeze. For Reid, it had been a caustic, lyrical, almost spring, wave that carried the promise of something extraordinary on back. Almost divine.

In that split second, in a time as short as a blink, the feeling that his life would never be the same made him losing his breath. Spencer does not know what attracted his gaze to the BAU door, nor what made his whole body turn in that direction, like a magnet, like a wanderer in the desert who finds his Oasis. But he had been attracted, and as soon as a female hand pushed through the glass door and her figure came into view, Spencer understood the extraordinary thing that him heart was beating for in anticipation.

You.

It was as if the universe had been preparing him all day for that moment. As if the body itself tried to prepare it. Because if Spencer hadn't fell those feelings of euphoria all day, he would have drowned in his own reactions to seeing you.

In a burst, like a violin string popping, Reid understood what was different about the hemisphere, because why the air was ethereal, because why the night felt like poetry, and why the moon whispered swears of love. In that moment, Spencer understood the mysteries of the world, unraveled the riddles of life, drank from the wisdom of The Oracle of ancient Greece. In an instant, watching you enter, Spencer understood the reason for his life.

In an instant.

The world shuddered in slow motion, capturing all your movements, all your graceful gait, all your glory. An elegant black dress with thin straps modeled your body in an arcane, almost divine way, your legs were supported on black high heels, making your walk seem like a glide of honey.

You were not beautiful. You are gorgeous. You shone. Sparkled.

And, like an atrocious wave that broke over Reid and pulled him into the sea, that whole feeling that stuck with him all day came to accompany the female figure. Following in your footsteps like the tail of a long dress.

Spencer was sure that his life would never be the same.

They hadn't even sat at their tables when you showed up. Like the muse that came out of an action movie. And when you got close enough to attract the attention of Emily and Morgan, whose Derek opened his mouth when he noticed the female figure that was the personification of Female Fatal, Spencer felt himself letting out the breath he didn't even know he was holding. He knew that anyone with eyes and a little common sense would notice how overwhelmingly beautiful you were, so when Morgan turned his body fully towards you, Reid was not surprised.

“Hi." Your voice, to Reid, had a floral intonation “Do you guys know where I can find Jason?”

When his eyes met yours, Spencer felt his breath being stolen from him once again. Usually, girls like you didn't look twice at guys like him, Spencer knew that. Girls like you liked men like Morgan. Athletes, strong, Alpha Male. And because of that, it was an explosion in Reid's system when you took a few seconds longer in that eye contact and a delightful smile appeared on yours lips. As if you appreciate what you were seeing.

That was a shock. Was it true or was he misinterpreting the signs? Was him mind playing tricks on him, like the flickering shadows of furniture under the darkness and the flame of a candle? Spencer would not be able to say a word without stuttering at that moment even that him life depended on it. In fact, he was already starting to feel cheeks heating up. So he thanked any deities that might exist when Morgan and Emily responded to you and broke the eye contact between the two of you.

“Jason Gideon?” Morgan frowned slightly.

“He's in the office but...” But Emily couldn't finish the sentence before Gideon's voice came out over everyone's:

“Y/n?” It was in a tone that no one there had ever heard in Gideon. A sweet, loving intonation... paternal.

None of the three agents present there had time to express their thoughts in facial expressions before you said:

“Dad!”

Then the whole world took a turn and seemed to be terrified, making them feel as if they had been thrown out of the tenth-floor window. This time, Reid's eyes widened at the two friends, who also had puzzled expressions. Everyone knew that Gideon had a past, probably with divorces and children, a life he had left behind, but no one expected...that.

Perhaps Gideon's vision of a family was something that was only in the imagination, never something tangible. Until that moment. Until the most beautiful girl Reid had ever seen was the daughter of one of the men he respected most. Until him heart soared at alarming levels for him boss's daughter. Spencer had been in trouble before when it came to matters of the heart, but the trouble gained a position in the top 3.

“What are you doing here?” A rare smile appeared on Gideon's face, his brow slightly furrowed.

“We were going to dinner today, remember? In that new Japanese restaurant.” Your tone of voice was not resentful or hurt by the situation that was explicit there.

The life of a BAU agent take many things, some with a more atrocious force than others, and one of them was the availability of hours. commitments that count on presence.

“I totally forgot, I'm sorry.” Gideon's voice was always calm and controlled, he managed to speak from the most tender emotions to the most heinous crimes with a peaceful intonation. But to perceive traces of parental love was new. “The case was very complicated, my cell phone died and...”

“It's okay, Dad.” You smiled, making a casual gesture with your hand “I thought this happened, but I thinking it best to come here to see if everything was okay instead of waiting until tomorrow.”

Your smile, despite being the simple one, was the brightest for Spencer.

Gideon still had a fatherly look and a chaste and grateful smile when he turned to the other agents who were still puzzled.

“Y/n, these are agents Derek Morgan, Emily Prentiss and Dr. Spencer Reid.” Jason introduced them to you “Guys, this is my daughter, Y/n.”

“Is a pleasure.” You smiled genuinely at them.

“I had no idea that you had a daughter!” Emily gave a low, slightly bewildered laugh that also made you laugh.

“Everybody says that.” You looked at your father again, having fun.

“I'm just going to go over some reports with Hotcher before I leave.” Gideon kept a chaste smile. “Why don't you wait here and then let's go get something to eat?”

“Of course, no problem, Dad.” You agreed, adjusting the thin shoulder bag that was on your shoulder.

As Jason went up to Hotcher's office, you turned to the agents again, with a gentle smile on your face.

“My dad said great things about you.” Emily smiled at your statement.

"I'm still chocked ." She laughed, and Morgan added:

“ I really need to know...” he looked around, in a playful suspense “Is Gideon really that serious outside the FBI?”

You laughed “Oh no! Definitely not.”

So you reached for your phone in the litlle bag, hunting for a photo on it and showing it to the three agents. It was a recent photograph where you and Gideon had their faces painted in easy ink. You had a skeleton mouth made with white and black paint, and Jason had a pink glitter butterfly covering his left cheek. You two were laughing in the photo.

Morgan was the one who let out a loud, dripping laugh, with a few tears accumulating in the corners of his eyes.

“How is this possible?” Morgan was trying to catch the air.

“It was at the last Halloween, he and I bet that whoever lost in the snooker that day would have to paint a butterfly on their face.” You laughed.

“And did he lose?” Spencer found a voice for it, his mind failing to process the image of Gideon losing any game.

“I have my suspicions that he let me win” You joked “But I enjoyed the victory just the same.”

The conversation was light after that, Spencer refrained from much of the dialogue, a little fearful that you could hear him heart beating loudly whenever you smile in his direction. As the minutes passed, Derek and Emily had to go back to their duties and finish their reports, while you were sitting in one of the chairs at an empty table.

It was one of those moments when Reid tried to focus on the files in front of him to exorcise what was going on around him. Paperwork had always brought the lull needed to make Spencer meditate. It was almost like relaxation. But in moments like this, when something in the environment around him pulled his attention so much, he stayed on the same page for long minutes.

That must be why he didn't hear the wheels on your chair approach, and he didn't even notice that you were so close until you said:

“Are you really a doctor?” Your voice was low, soft, as if you didn't want to disturb the other agents who were working.

Spencer turned his head towards you, only to find the modern personification of what would be the Athena de Troia. You were close, not close enough to touch, but close enough that he could smell your perfume. You smelled like the night, the excitement of nights and the brightness of the stars. And if Spencer looked deeper into yours eyes, he would sure they contained shine moonlight.

He swallowed, the mania for blinking compulsively returning a little.

“A-ahm yes. Not really a doctor, but m-my 3 Phd’s make me a doctor.”

He might be mistaken, but the smile that spread across your face was not just friendly, it wasn't curious, it was… delighted. As if the roles were reversed and he was the most fascinating thing in that room, not you.

The glow that was adorned in yours eyes had something lyrical, ethereal, wonderful. As if the brightness of all the galaxies were inhabiting your irises, moving in your orbit. At that moment, Spencer was deeply grateful to have eidetic memory, because 10 years from now he could still remember how you looked like a muse over there. DC night came in through the big glass windows, and if Reid had to describe that moment with the five senses, he would say that the world had turned the light down to a rose tone, the smell was heaven and your smile promised to contain wonders of the world.

Holy Mother of God, you are so, so beautiful!

“My dad said there was a genius on the team.” You said, your attention on him is always tender, adoreble. “Do you mind if I ask you something?”

Your perfume invaded him sense of smell once again, and he felt his heart beat faster once more. Spencer would have told you all the secrets in the world if you asked. He would have told all own secrets.

“No way.” He sat back in his chair to look at you better, oblivious to the exchange of looks that Emily and Morgan gave.

You rested your arms on Spencer's table, the chair next to his.

“You never thought of being like... the wizard Doctor Strange?” You hoped that Spencer knew Marvel “Before he was a magician, of course. But why didn't you want to be a surgeon or something?” You laughed “There is a phrase him says: I have a photographic memory and this is what made me ..."

“ ‘Get my diploma and doctorate at the same time’ " Spencer completed you, laughing softly “I know the HQs. Did you know that the Doctor Strange character was created during the Silver Age of American comics to bring a different type of character and mystical themes to Marvel Comics? It him has an intellectual coefficient close to 177 points and I have… ”

The more he rambled, the more a stunning smile spread across your face. As if you were enchanted with him. And you were. Everyone was noticing the way Spencer seemed to have you curled up on his finger, your eyes sparkling and a silly smile twinkling on your face, paying attention to every word he said. It was an overwhelmingly lovely sight to behold.

But just as everything had a time, an hourglass, your time had reached the last grain of sand.

“All right, Y/n.” Gideon went down the stairs, cutting the end of Reid's sentence “Ready?”

You stood up, agreeing with your father and smoothing the dress. When you put your hands on the chair, ready to take it back to place, you turned to Spencer once again:

“I'm going to bring my dad to BAU tomorrow, do you think me and you can meting and you give me the answer to the question tomorrow?” Your smile was able to light up the whole of Washington.

“S-sure!” Spencer's voice went up more high notes than he would like to admit.

And, even when you left, even when Morgan and Emily jokes him about it, and even when he finally lay down on his own bed, you were still the only thing that occupied Spencer's mind.

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inomios · 3 years

Text

Eight types of love II Levi Ackerman

Summary: “There are eight types of love, and even though his life has been full of pain since the very beginning, he could say he experienced them all.”

Genre: Angst and Fluff

Word count: + 5k

Author note: This is the first thing I’ve ever published and I’m really nervous, so I would really appreciate if you reblogged, liked and commented. Also, English is not my first language, so I’m sorry for any mistakes. Constructive criticism is really appreciated.

. . . .

1. AGAPE or Selfless love

His mother would tell him everyday that she loved him with everything she had, even though it was not a lot. He asked his mother what love was, what meant loving someone. She couldn’t explain it with exact words, she would tell him that love meant caring deeply for someone, even more than for yourself. She loved him and he loved her, that much was true. He asked if he could love more than one person, his mom told him that yes, you could love many people in your life and in different ways. Then, he proceeded to ask if she had ever loved anyone else besides him, she was quiet, like she was thinking the right answer and after a few minutes she said that she had or at least she thought she did, but she had never loved someone as much as she loved him. Love was a confusing thing for him and the more he asked, the more unclear it got.

The only thing he was sure of was that the only thing she loved was her mother. However, curious as he was, he would ask her questions about it all the time.

‘Is love the best thing in the world?’

‘Yes, Levi, it is the only thing that makes life worth it.’

‘Is love always good?’

‘Not always, sometimes it makes you sad.’

‘I don’t wanna be sad. I won’t love anyone else but you.’

‘You can’t choose who you love, sweetie.’

‘Love sucks.’

‘You will get it when you grow up.’

‘I’m already a grown-up.’

He tried to get it, but he couldn’t. He prided himself of being smart, his mom would always tell him that he was really clever and witty for his age. Then, how come he wasn’t able to understand love. It was just a four-letter word: L-O-V-E, it couldn’t have such a deep meaning. ‘Door’ had also four letters and it wasn’t hard to understand and ‘Scandalous’, pretty much the biggest word for him, had ten letters and he knew what it meant, he could even use it in a phrase.

His mom, noticing that he was about to collapse trying to figure out what has love, tried to come up with the best possible definition, one that would please his five-year old son.

‘Love is a selfless thing. Love means giving everything you have, to make the other person happy and content, even though you may not get back all you give. When you love someone, you only what the best for them. It can cause you pain too but loving someone and being loved back is one of the best things we can experience as humans. We may not have a lot, Levi, but we have each other and more important, we love one another and that makes us privileged.’

He understood it then, kind of, so the questions stopped.

However, when his mother’s body laid lifeless in bed, he regretted not making one last question: ‘if you died, do you think anyone would ever love me, mom?’

Later, when he was under Kenny’s wing and after Kenny had left him at his own, he soon found an answer: no one would.

2. PHILIA or Affectionate love

After his mother’s death, after Kenny, after everything, he thought that love was out of his reach, something he could never have again. Then Isabel and Farlan happened.

Every single day since his mother died, he would ask himself if he would love again and if someone would love him back. However, at the same time, he wanted to know nothing about love, love brought pain and he had already suffered enough for a lifetime. He sometimes thought that he had an emptiness inside, a big hole where his heart should be, a room so big that no one could ever fill.

After his mom came Kenny, but he was sure he did not love him, at least not like he had loved his mother, and he was sure as hell Kenny did not love him back. Love was supposed to be selfless and caring and Kenny was selfish and did not give a damn about him, he proved him that when he left him alone, again.

Loneliness was a feeling he was already used to but being used to it didn’t mean he liked it. Then again, who would be dumb enough to love him? And he knew better than to love someone who would end up leaving him, like his mother did, like Kenny did.

Well, maybe he did love Kenny, but loving him was painful. While loving his mother was sweet, freeing and it brought him solace and comfort; loving Kenny was toxic and tough, when he thought about it, it troubled him. He gave him a home and he taught him how to survive in the Underground, he didn’t know why, but he raised him, and Kenny never did something freely, he was sure something was missing there, but he didn’t know what. It was stupid of him to think that he cared about him, but a little white lie never hurt anyone. Loving Kenny, seeing him as the paternal figure he never had, filled him with turmoil and changed the way he perceived love.

Love was weakness, it could bring you to your knees, he had learned that. It was pointless, why would you commit to something that would inevitably bring you sorrow? He wasn’t about to make the same mistake again, he knew better, the only person who would stay with him was himself and that wasn’t about to change.

Then Isabel and Farlan walked into his life. Well, Farlan walked, Isabel stumbled.

They became family. He knew better but he couldn’t help it. They were thick as thieves, literally. Suddenly, they became the family he yearned for since his mother died. He loved them with everything he had. Loving them was selfless as his mother said, he wanted the best for them, he wanted to see them happy, no matter the price. However, it was a different kind of love, it was pure affection. It wasn’t the adoration he had for his mother, nor the rage he felt for Kenny. It was tender and sweet, he never had a brother or a close friend to care about while growing up, but he thought it was supposed to feel like that, it had to be like that. It had to be another type of love. His mother told him that love was never the same, it had different shapes and, for him, at that moment love had Isabel and Farlan’s shape.

Sadly, nothing good lasts forever, at least not for him. Love causes pain and brings you to your knees, he shouldn’t have forgotten that. When he saw Isabel’s head laying on the floor surrounded by a puddle of her own blood, mouth agape, eyes wide open and pale face, he fell to his knees. He saw a supercut of him, Isabel and Farlan, all the good times, all the laughs they shared and all the stories they still had to write but they would never be able to do because they weren’t there, not anymore, they were gone like his mother, like Kenny. He was alone again.

Love always brought him to his knees and he would never forget it again. He wasn’t made for love; the same way love wasn’t made for him.

3. LUDUS or Playful love

Meeting you happened out of pure coincidence, being in the right place at the wrong time.

He had come from a long mission and he was completely and utterly fine, seriously, but Hange loved to make a big deal out of everything. Well, maybe he had an injury, but a minor one, nothing that he couldn’t take care of himself. He spent years in the Underground, he didn’t need a doctor, he could stitch himself up and place his bones back in place. However, Hange didn’t think the same and was nagging him about getting his injuries checked, so there he was, in one of the infirmary’s bed, waiting for the head doctor.

It wasn’t that he was scared of doctors or “hospitals”, he just didn’t like the idea of some stranger touching him or feeling hopeless and powerless, he didn’t like feeling like he needed help or advice, he could do it pretty much on his own. But Hange didn’t really trust his medical abilities and he knew that arguing with her was pointless.

‘Doctor Brunner couldn’t come since he is busy with some paperwork, so he sent me. I’m his trainee y/n y/ln.’

‘I’m not letting some failed attempt of medic treat my wounds.’

It wasn’t what people would call a ‘meet cute’ moment, it was more like a ‘meet jerk’. He wasn’t the best dealing with people, nor that he wanted to be, he preferred it that way. If you had been any other person, you wouldn’t have bitten back, but you had a sharp tongue and weren’t scared of him. That was probably what drew him in, he was so used to people recoiling in fear when they saw him that having someone that actually fought back was quite alluring.

‘Well, this failed attempt of a doctor knows more than you ever will, so act your age, stop being a bitch and let me tend your injuries.’

‘You have some nerve talking to me like that.’

‘You have some nerve coming to my workplace to insult me.’

During that first encounter none of you said much to each other. He wasn’t fond on talking and you didn’t like his attitude, so you didn’t try to strike a conversation. He had to admit that you were good at you job, you tended him with care and you knew what you were doing, not that he would tell you, at least not yet.

‘Well, not so bad for a failed attempt of a doctor.’

It was the closest thing to a compliment he could say, and it looked like you knew, because he swears that he saw you smile a little.

‘Aren’t you a pleasure to work with? The injury in your arm was pretty nasty and poorly treated, so luckily for you, you will have to drop by more times to check on you. These are my hours, if you want this failed attempt of a doctor to treat you, Captain. I could get used to see your friendly face now and then.’

He didn’t know if the last part was supposed to be interpreted as flirting, but he did come back to visit you, to keep an eye of his injury, obviously. However, if you asked Hange, she would say that you had caught his eye, he still says that at that point in your relationship you annoyed him too much to find himself interested in you.

His weekly visits turned into daily visits, so much for not liking you.

‘I’m starting to think I’ve managed to catch your attention, Captain.’

‘Tch, you’re just less annoying than the rest of the brats.’

‘Oh Captain, you really know how to make me blush.’

He lied. You did catch his attention and you both knew it. It wasn’t love, not at all, it was a gentle curiosity that grew a little bit every day, like a flower blossoming.

‘Tch, you only know to say shit with that mouth of yours.’

‘This mouth of mine knows to do a lot of things, want me show you, Captain?’

‘When you return from the expedition, you have to come to the infirmary to see your wounds and stop playing the hero, it’s bullshit.’

‘I’m starting to think you may have an obsession for doing check-ups on me, brat.’

‘You caught me, I only do them because I can’t keep my hands of you, Captain.’

‘Why do you always call me Captain? It’s annoying, I’m not your superior.’

‘I know, but I like teasing you with it, Captain.’

He cared for you more than he cared for other people in his life, he liked being with you, maybe that was another type of love. Loving his mother was selfless; loving Isabel and Farlan was affectionate; loving you, or whatever the hell he was felling, was playful, flirty and it filled him with joy.

Maybe it wasn’t love, but it was getting there.

4. MANIA or Obsessive love

Your relationship was frustrating everybody, absolutely every single person that knew about you two, everybody knew you had feelings for each other but none of you did something about it, you just kept tiptoeing around each other. It was painful to see. They didn’t know if you were oblivious, stupid, scared or if you were just messing with them, Hange believed the latter one because there was no way you two weren’t together already. The banter, the flirty remarks, the way he looked out for you and the way you took care of him.

‘What’s going on with you and y/n, Shorty?’

‘You tell me, Four-eyes’

‘Tell me the truth, y/n. Are you and Levi dating and just keeping it as a secret? Because I’m losing my mind.’

‘We aren’t dating, Hange.’

To be honest, Levi was losing his mind too. The playful game turned into something more serious, something more obsessive and he didn’t like it. He couldn’t stop thinking about you and what were you doing while he was busy with paperwork. On missions his mind wandered about your wellbeing and if you were fine. He couldn’t ignore the way his heartbeat became erratic whenever you were close to him or the way he would notice every single thing about you. He felt powerless, there was no way to stop it.

He, who always had a plan and knew to do, was helpless under something he could have prevented, or at least something he think he could have avoided. Deep down he knew that he would have fallen for you one way or another, some things are bound to happen, and love is one of them, but he didn’t want to admit that something as mundane as love could outpower him in his own life.

He was aware of how you felt about him, you weren’t scared to be vocal about it and it drove him mad, and by the way his stoic eyes would gleam and glisten while looking at you, you were certain it was mutual. He knew that if he said the word or gave you signal, you’d be his and he’d be yours, but he couldn’t give you what you wanted, and it was a matter of time before you got tired of him. You were young and beautiful, one the most outstanding creatures he had ever seen, you could do better than him and you’d realize soon enough. Life was too short to waste it on him.

‘What are you waiting for, Levi? Do something about it because it’s getting painful to watch.’

‘Get off my fucking case, Four-eyes.’

Everyone was waiting for him to do something, but he couldn’t. In those moments he remembered the question he wasn’t able to ask his mother: ‘if you died, do you think anyone would ever love me, mom?’ His mother loved him, and she died, just like Isabel and Farlan, he couldn’t love you, because he’ll end up losing you, the same way he lost everyone else.

He was loveless.

But you weren’t, and you found someone to do what he couldn’t do, someone to love you like you deserved.

He didn’t know a lot about them. You looked happier and that was all he cared about. He thought that seeing you with another person would calm his heart and his desires, but they only got worse, there was no way of forgetting about you. You were everywhere.

‘C’mon Levi, do something.’

‘Didn’t I tell you to drop it, Hange?’

His visits stopped but you kept waiting for him, hoping he would come to his senses. You didn’t get it, you really didn’t. He had the opportunity, he could have taken the chance to be with you, but he didn’t, so you moved on, or tried to, you didn’t love your partner, but you could see yourself falling in love with them. However, you still missed Levi, not as a potential lover, but as a friend. The way he erased you from his life as you were nothing broke your heart. What did he want from you?

He wanted everything. He wanted all of you and yet he couldn’t do anything about it. He was just frozen in time while you kept moving. He met your partner, they came to visit you once, they were gentle and loving, they looked at you like you were the brightest star in the firmament. They held your hand and kissed your lips. They did all the things he wanted to do. He was jealous, but he didn’t have the right to say something, he had never had the right.

The way he looked at you made you feel guilty, like you were betraying him, and you were so confused and annoyed and angry and mad, and you really wanted to punch him in the face. So, you went to his room that night and stormed in.

‘What the fuck is wrong with you?’

‘I should be asking that, I’m not the one barging in someone else’s room with no previous invitation.’

He had never seen you like that, so mad and full of rage and it was all directed to him and he knew it was his fault.

‘What do you want of me, Levi?’

He wanted everything.

He wanted you.

‘I don’t know what you’re talking about. Could you please stop making me lose my time?’

He saw it in your face, that was the last straw.

‘You’re selfish, an asshole, a prick and a lot of other things. But above it all, you’re a fucking coward, so much for Humanity’s Strongest. For fucks sake, Levi, I loved you, I still do, but I can’t keep waiting for someone who is too scared to do something about it. I want you and you want me too. What’s stopping you?’

He remembered again, the question he never had the chance to ask: ‘if you died, do you think anyone would ever love me, mom?’

You loved him and you weren’t scared of it. But he was, and you were about to leave the room. You turned your back on him and it was now or never. He had to choose: would he let you walk away definitely of his life or would he do something?

For once, he didn’t think, he didn’t listen to his head, he listened to his heart. For so long he made himself believe that he didn’t have a heart, but his heart was right there, beating for you.

He kissed you and you kissed him back.

‘Mine.’

‘Yours.’

5. EROS or Passionate love

You both were private people, you didn’t want people talking about your relationship during its first stages, what you had was precious and new and you wanted to protect it from the world a little longer. That’s why no one really knew about the whole ordeal, well, they knew that something had shifted because you could be in the same room without making everyone uncomfortable with your unsolved issues, but they couldn’t pinpoint what had exactly changed, they just guessed that you sorted everything out, finally.

However, Hange did know what changed. She prided herself on knowing Levi, after many years working with him she had learned that Levi only talked through his body language, so she started paying attention to what his body said instead of listening to the words he spewed. Therefore, when she asked him if he was dating you and he said a short no, he knew he was lying. She noticed how he seemed more at ease, how you had broken up with your partner, the way he would gravitate towards you and that when he looked at you, his eyes weren’t filled with longing and remorse, they were shinier and less cold than usual. So, she obviously knew that something was up, but she kept quiet. She may talk way too much, and people could find her annoying, but at the end of the day she was a good friend, and she would respect that neither of you wanted to make things public.

Keeping things private was harder than he originally thought, he was distant and cold to everyone, but he couldn’t be cold and distant with you when you made him burn inside and he could only think about holding you close. It was weird for him, he had spent so many years deprived of touch that he couldn’t imagine himself getting addicted to it, but he was wrong, so wrong.

You knew that Levi was touch starved, you didn’t need to be a genius to notice. When you picked up his body language and started hearing about his childhood, everything came together: his mother died when he was very young, the most paternal figure he had was toxic and abusive to him and since Isabel and Farlan he didn’t let anyone in easily. Levi wasn’t used to someone doting him and you knew that if you started showering him with affection, it would probably scare him off a little, and that was the last thing you wanted. So, you started slowly: holding hands, gentle caresses, kisses in his cheek, hugs, light pecks on the lips and when you saw that he started getting more comfortable, things started scaling on their own, you let him mark the pace. It wasn’t a quick process, but it was worth it.

After a few months, Levi couldn’t keep his hands of you and he surely didn’t want you to keep your hands off him. This was a new kind of love, at first, on the early stages of your relationship it was playful, but then it evolved into something more passionate: quick pecks turned into open mouthed kisses; holding hands innocently turned into holding you close while you came undone under him again and again; kisses now went lower and lower, exploring new parts of you that he hadn’t seen and that no one else would. He didn’t think that touch could mean so much to him, but it did now, and he knew that couldn’t ever go back to a touchless life where you wouldn’t be there to love him.

6. PHILAUTIA or Self-love

He wasn’t neither deaf, blind or stupid. He could hear what people had to say about your relationship, how you deserved better than him; he could see his reflection on the mirror and how he wasn’t beautiful, at least not as much as you, he wasn’t the male that would make people swoon and he knew that you could have any man or female you wanted, but you chose him, out of every other person, you decided to be with him. He was a lucky bastard and you didn’t make good decisions, what a match.

You would look at him like he held the stars in the sky, and you would touch him like he was about to disappear in any moment, as if he were a dream you were afraid to wake up from. He didn’t get why him, he wasn’t the most handsome, nor the nicest, nor the easiest to love, and you still decided to keep him around. He liked to think that he was smart or cleverer than the average, and yet he couldn’t grasp his head around that the fact you loved him and just him, and that was it, it was as simple as that.

Whenever you heard the things people said about your partner, you went feral, because you knew all those comments fueled the self-hate Levi had. Being loveless for so long it obviously affected the perception he had of himself and you wanted to change that, because he deserved it, he deserved all the happiness in this dull world. He liked to play strong, but you saw through him, and even though he never acted upon them, it hurt him. You wished he could see himself through you eyes, because it caused you pain the mere idea of him thinking less of himself, that he wasn’t worthy of your love.

You would tell him every day how much you loved him, as if you were reciting a prayer to your own god.

‘I love you.’

‘You’re beautiful.’

‘I could stare at you for the rest of my life.’

‘I don’t know what I would do without you.’

You would tell him that he needed to love himself, see the good inside of him, he guessed that that was one the types of love he had yet to discover: self-love. He didn’t see himself capable of loving himself nearly the half of how much you loved him.

‘You know one reason why you should love yourself, because you make me the happiest I’ve ever been.’

He didn’t love himself, not yet, but if he was able to make you smile like that, he couldn’t be that unworthy of you.

7. STORGE or Familiar love

He had been avoiding love for as long as he could remember, and then you burst into his life with the force of a typhoon. Love had found him, and he couldn’t get away, you never can, it was a lesson that he had finally accepted.

For so long he saw love as something unnecessary, a burden for the soul. Love ruins you, it stabs you on the back, whenever he let his walls down, love would always take advantage of it and destroy him, bringing him closer to insanity, he had lost himself too many times by loving people and when he met you, he did not want the cycle to repeat itself. He didn’t want more Kuchels, Kennys, Isabels and Farlans, love was merciless, and he wasn’t interested in it, at least that was what he told to himself every day, that he was better off alone. Was all the pain worth it? He thought love came with a high price and he couldn’t afford it. However, things change, life happens, destiny has always something in the store, well, in his case he had someone.

You were his everything, the beacon that brought light in his life, for so long he had been lost, walking amongst shadows, nearly becoming one, and when you appeared you changed the rules of the game, of his game. Every wall he had built around himself came down and you filled every gap his heart was missing. It was the scariest thing he had ever done, letting you in, letting someone in, giving someone else the control of his own heart. You knew the power you held between your hands and you never abused it. You were his solace in this mad world, the oasis in the middle of the desert.

Loving him was not easy, he knew it, he was rude, sharp, too closed off, mean, he was what people liked to call a ‘fucking jerk’ and yet you never gave up on him, on what you had. Instead of leaving when you had the chance, you stayed through thick and thin: through sleepless nights, through his bad moods and grumpiness, through his biting remarks… .You didn’t ran way, you were too stubborn for that, instead you taught him more forms of love.

You were all of the ones he knew and more.

You were selfless, giving him every part of you and loving him with everything you had to offer.

You were his best friend, his companion, the better half of him.

You were playful, joyous, probably the only thing that could make him smile and bring him happiness.

You were consuming, like a fire burning inside of him.

You were passionate, intoxicating.

You were every form of love he had ever experienced, but nothing could have ever prepared him for the kind of love he was experiencing in that moment: the familiar one. The one you feel when you hold your newborn in your trembling hands. It was something he couldn’t describe, there weren’t words for it, he tried to, but he failed every single time.

This was the way his mom loved him, and then he knew how much he had meant for his own mother. While holding little Kuchel on his arms, he remembered all those days and nights on that dirty brothel, all the hours he spent by his mother’s side, how she would do everything to give him the best life and he soon realized there was nothing in this world he wouldn’t do for his daughter. It wasn’t the best of times to have a child, but in that moment, in that precise instant, when Kuchel opened her grey eyes, he was sure of one thing: he would tear everything and everyone down only to see her smile.

A knock on the door. Another one. Two minutes passed and then Hange, followed by Erwin, entered in the room.

‘Tch, Shitty-glasses, who gave you permission to come in?’

‘My authority as a god-mother.’

‘Don’t make me regret it.’

‘She’s beautiful, what’s her name?’

‘Her name is Kuchel.’

Kuchel was his new world, he loved her so much that it was overwhelming, he would never love someone as much as he loved her, and no one would probably love with the same devotion Levi Ackerman loved his daughter.

‘You know, Kuchel, you are the best thing that has ever happened to me and I promise you that you will have the best life a man like me can give you. I may be a little cold, perhaps a little strict and you will probably get mad at me sometimes, but no matter what happens, I will love you through everything. And by the way, no dating until I’m dead because no brat will be good enough for you. You deserve the world Kuchel and I’ll give you everything it has to offer. Things may get hard, you aren’t born in the best circumstances, but I’ll protect you because you deserve the life I couldn’t live.’

Kuchel’s first word was ‘dadda’.

Kuchel’s first steps were pointed towards his father.

Kuchel’s favorite pastime was being in his father’s arms.

Kuchel could only sleep after his father had kissed her forehead.

And Kuchel would never love someone as much as he loved his father, because she loved him as much as he loved her.

8. PRAGMA or Enduring love

He was old and wrinkly, he was scarred, mutilated and there were days he couldn’t sleep because the nightmares were too real. But he was happy, he was married to the most beautiful and special person he had ever met, he had a loving daughter, a bunch of brats he was proud to call grandchildren and the tea shop he had always dreamed about.

Life hadn’t been fair to him. He had lost so many people he cared about, he had fought a war and he had had the weight of the world on his shoulders. But, after all, after the tortures, the adversities, the deaths… He had people who loved and whom he loved.

Love was worth it. He had finally learned that.

At his seventies he found out about the last kind of love, the enduring, the one that lasts and survives in time. He loved his family above everything, and he would love them long after his bones turn into ashes and no one remembers his name.

Then he recalled that question he never got to ask his mother: ‘if you died, do you think anyone would ever love me, mom?’

He looked at the sky and smiled.

‘After all someone was fool enough to love me mom, who would have thought?’

A gentle breeze caressed his skin and a single tear fell from his eye.

‘I guess that’s the way you have of answering the question.’

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therealvinelle · 2 years

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Scrapped chapter 8 for Bleach on the Brain

As the title says. I wrote this chapter for chapter 8 of Bleach, but wound up not liking it and after discussing with my very good beta @theoriginalcarnivorousmuffin, I decided to scrap it and start completely over.

Good news is, I decided to publish it here on tumblr for those interested.

The first scene is canon to the fic, so to say. It picks up where chapter 7 left off, with Renesmée having just woken up from her dream. The second scene is the reason the chapter had to go, as I was trying to beat the characters into submission and the result was subpar.

Word count: 3763

She snatched her hands out of Jacob’s, and scrambled out of her bed with lightning speed.

Bella followed, her face etched with concern as she reached out to hold her daughter. «Nessie, sweetheart,» she said.

For the first time in her life, Renesmée backed away from her mother, her back colliding with the wall.

Bella froze, looked unsure, and turned around to look to Edward for advice.

Edward, who was watching them all in impassive shock. «Renesmée,» he said, still in that quiet, inflectionless voice, «could you tell us what that was all about?»

«Maybe we should calm down a bit first,» Bella supplied, and closed the distance between her and Renesmée.

Renesmée found herself drawn into her mother’s thin arms, that achingly familiar scent filling her nostrils.

She slowly put her hands up to return the embrace, and buried her face in her mother’s neck, hoping to stop her heart from racing, and from feeling so—

She tried, as she always did, to pull herself together, to build up the walls of mental equilibrium around her, but the pieces were all scattered.

Edward had asked about Carlisle, that meant he’d seen…

A warm hand came to rest on her back. «Nessie?» she heard Jacob’s low voice next to her. «Are you okay?»

She held onto Bella tighter, wanting Jacob and Edward both to go away.

She heard Edward sigh, and then his approaching footsteps.

Bella guided her to sit at the edge of her bed, and sat down next to her.

Jacob sat on the other side of Renesmée, taking one of her hands in his and giving it a tight squeeze. This time, she didn’t pull away.

Edward knelt before her. «Renesmée,» he said, mustering a tight and quick smile that he had probably intended to be paternal, «that was a very troubling dream you had there. Would you mind telling us about it?»

Renesmée looked back at her father, and—

He’d asked about Carlisle, not what dream-Jasper had made her admit about his and Bella’s relationship.

Not even about what Jasper had said about Jacob.

«Because that wasn’t real,» Edward told her gently, his reassuring smile more successful this time. «You had a nightmare, that doesn’t make any of what Jasper said true.»

«Yeah, Jacob said, «you know I love you, Nessie. More than anything. And you love me. I’m your best friend, remember?»

He gave her a smile, but he looked terribly nervous.

«Your father and I love each other, Renesmée,» Bella said quietly. «Don’t ever let any nightmare make you doubt that.»

Renesmée didn’t say anything.

«Your mother and Jacob are right,» Edward said, his reassuring smile starting to slip around the edges, «you only had a nightmare. However…»

Every trace of that reassuring smile slipped off his face, and his eyes grew intense.

Renesmée’s stomach tightened, she knew what was coming.

And that alone gave her away.

She could see her father’s sharp eyes on her, soaking in her every little passing strand of consciousness.

«What Carlisle said sounded like a memory,» he said, his voice colder than she’d ever heard it before.

And—

God, she wanted more than anything in the world to keep it from Edward, to somehow find the mental control to fool her own thoughts.

But all she could think about was how her grandfather had trusted her, taken her into his confidence and told her all the things he’d never told anyone else.

And less than a week later she’d betrayed that trust.

There was no helping it.

«Oh, Nessie, no,» Jacob said when he saw her eyes well up with tears, and as they started streaming down her face he tried to pull her into his arms.

She wiggled out from his hold and leaned against Bella instead, wishing for a moment that she hadn’t grown so damn fast, and could still have fit in her mother’s lap.

«Nessie!» Bella cried in alarm, and for the second time in a few minutes Renesmée found herself being held by her mother.

«Jesus, Nessie,» Jacob muttered, stroking a hand along her back.

Renesmée flinched, and cried harder.

And tried so very hard not to think of Carlisle, and how she’d failed him, even as that thought was blaring in her mind, refusing to budge even slightly.

«Renesmée,» Edward said in a tight voice, «exactly what did Carlisle tell you?»

«I knew something had happened,» Jacob muttered.

«Renesmée,» Edward said again, and now his hand was on her shoulder, «could you please answer me.»

She didn’t answer, didn’t even turn to look at him even as he pulled slightly to see her face.

But then, after a moment, Bella reached up to her upper arms, and pulled away to see her face.

«Nessie,» she said, «I understand you’re upset, but you’re safe now. It was only a dream. We all love you, okay?» she smiled warmly.

Nevermind Rosalie, or any of the Denali sisters, or Siobhan, Renesmée had always thought her mother was the most beautiful woman in the world. Just looking at her kind and loving face was usually enough to make Renesmée feel better, but now—

Bella’s face became a blur.

«Sweetie!» Bella protested, and wiped away the tears as they fell. «Sweetie, don’t cry. Oh, Nessie, I’m so sorry.»

«I think, Nessie,» Edward said softly, «that you’re not upset by any of what Jasper said, or even the dream itself. I think you’re upset because of Carlisle.»

Renesmée’s miserably sobs betrayed her, they tore themselves out of her throat at his words, as revealing as if she’d simply said «Yes».

«What in the hell did he do to her?!» Jacob demanded, and twisted Renesmée around so she’d look at him. «Did he hurt you? Did he—»

«Leave me alone!» Renesmée cried, and leapt up from the bed, only to come down again on Bella’s other side, where she grabbed a tight hold of her mother’s arm.

«Jacob,» Edward said quietly, «you’re not helping.»

Then, moving to the left so he was kneeling before her again, he asked Renesmée, «Could you tell me what you talked about with Carlisle that day?»

Renesmée shot a desperate look at her mother, only to find her mother looking at her with concern and expectation.

She wanted to know too.

«You don’t want to tell me?» Edward continued.

«Did he ask you to keep it secret?» Jacob asked in a voice thick with suspicion.

Renesmée drew her knees up to her chest, and put her available arm around them.

Edward knew that was a yes. «In your dream, you thought—» he looked away for a moment, swallowing so hard his Adam’s apple bobbed visibly, and then he looked back at her. «You thought he’d been taken sexual advantage of by Aro. Nessie, is that true?»

Her traitorous mind answered for her.

As a stream of information, Renesmée’s horror at learning her grandfather had ever been with Aro in that way, and skepticism that it could have been consensual, and Carlisle’s own conviction that it was, flashed through her conscious mind.

And Edward saw it all, his golden eyes piercing right through her, unblinking, unyielding.

To his credit, he didn’t lose his composure.

He didn’t do anything at all, didn’t say anything, he just looked up at her, the only sign that anything was wrong at all being the look in his eyes.

Renesmée watched him breathlessly, not daring to move as he stared at her, kept her mind focused on how dreadful that look in his eyes was so she at least wouldn’t be thinking about any more of what Carlisle had told her.

Even Jacob was quiet as Edward sat there kneeling on the floor, taking in what Renesmée had unwillingly passed on to him.

«I see,» Edward finally said tonelessly.

He stood up, a grim look of determination making his youthful features seem far older.

«Edward?» Bella asked timidly.

It was a few seconds before he replied.

«Pack up,» he said, his eyes still trained on Renesmée. «We’re going home.»

With that, he swept from the room, leaving Renesmée to lose whatever composure she’d had, and weep.

When Bella left the room to pack, it was Jacob who stayed to be with Renesmée.

LINEBREAK

The journey home had been silent.

First the boat ride back to the mainland, then the long drive to the airport, then the flight, which never seemed to end, and finally the hour-long drive back to Forks.

An entire day of travelling, and she never slept, not when it would mean letting down her mental guard, not when she might have another dream. Not when she had given so much away already.

They arrived home in the late evening.

Alice was waiting for them outside when Edward’s car came to a stop in front of the house.

«You’re home early,» she said.

Edward, Bella, Renesmée, and Jacob each filed out of the car.

«Something came up,» Edward said, and walked right past Alice, into the house.

Renesmée could not help a stab of relief that his attention was no longer solely on her.

Except, that meant his attention was now on Carlisle instead, and he was unprepared.

Bella smiled at her daughter. «Let’s go to the cottage, hm? You must be exhausted.»

Then, in a lower voice, she added, «And we can talk, just you and me.»

Renesmée looked down at her mother, her favorite person in the whole world.

Who, for all that she loved Renesmée, did not understand that Renesmée didn’t want her dreams watched. She hadn’t even wanted privacy for herself, when she was human and a boy she hardly knew was watching her, so how could she understand Renesmée’s wish?

And—

Renesmée turned her head to look at the house.

She had nothing to contribute, if anything her presence would only make it worse as her thoughts might slip up again, but… it didn’t feel right to simply leave the house, knowing Carlisle had to face Edward, completely unprepared and with no chance to gather his thoughts.

Inside the house, she heard Edward go up the stairs leading to Carlisle’s office, and from within Carlisle’s office she heard the sound of typing come to a halt, followed by the dull sound of a laptop closing.

The dread in Renesmée’s stomach was threatening to choke her.

«Nessie?» Bella inquired, stroking a cold hand alongside Renesmée’s cheek.

Jasper appeared in the doorway, and whether it was his gift, or just the look on Renesmée’s face, he seemed to realize at a glance that she needed an excuse to stay. «Emmett and I are just wrapping up Borderlands 2,» he said, pointing into the house with a thumb over his shoulder, his eyes on Renesmée. «We were thinking of Enemy Unknown next, she could watch us play.»

Renesmée nodded quickly. «That would be nice, uncle Jasper,» she said, and tried to smile.

Unfortunately, all that came to mind when she tried to look at him, was the cruel expression he’d worn in her dream.

Judging by Jacob’s suddenly stiff stance, he was thinking the same thing.

Jasper looked from Renesmée to Jacob, and a light frown creased his scarred brow.

«Bella,» Jacob said tensely, «I think you should take Renesmée to the cottage. I need to speak with Jasper.»

Jasper’s eyebrows rose at that, but Bella nodded. «Come on, Nes,» she muttered, drawing a strong arm around Renesmée’s shoulders.

Renesmée stumbled along, even as she heard Edward upstairs in Carlisle’s office.

Carlisle was silent, as he usually was when he was having a private conversation with Edward, so she only heard Edward’s half. «Yes… yes. Could we talk in private?»

Renesmée’s steps slowed.

«You want me to carry you?» Bella offered.

Renesmée looked down at her, and—

It would be nice to talk to her mother without Edward’s interference, without having to constantly guard her thoughts.

But then she would have to sleep.

They would talk, it would be nice, and then Bella would take her to her room. She would tuck Renesmée into her bed, as she had never stopped doing, and then…

Then Renesmée would dream.

She turned to look at the house.

Emmett tended to forget her human half of things. If she didn’t stop gaming, then neither would he. She could claim she was overtired if anyone asked.

She would have to sleep eventually, but for the moment, she would put it off.

«I wanna go inside the house,» she blurted to Bella, her decision made.

Bella looked at her in surprise. 

«She wants to stay up tonight,» Edward said, and Renesmée’s head snapped around to see him standing with Carlisle, the two of them clearly headed for the woods for a private conversation.

«Oh, Nessie,» Bella said, and sighed. «You could have slept on the plane.»

«Yes, well,» Renesmée said quickly, «I wasn’t tired, and— video games sound nice, I’m in the mood. If you don’t mind I think I’d like to spend a little time with uncle Emmett and uncle Jasper. Enemy Unknown, right?» she asked Jasper.

Then, shrugging out of her mother’s arm around her, Renesmée ran inside the house.

She went into the living room, where Rosalie was watching Emmett play, and she’d picked up Jasper’s abandoned console before anyone had time to react.

Emmett looked at her, to the single player screen, and with a nearly imperceptible grimace he went back to multi player.

«Sorry, Em,» Rosalie said, «but I’m on team Blue now.»

«You’re not rooting for me?!» Emmett demanded, and turned around to give his wife an outraged look.

Rosalie shrugged. «Niece trumps husband. Give him hell, Nessie.»

Renesmée was far too tense to say anything, she just clutched at her console.

«Actually,» Jacob said, trotting into the room, «Nessie was just leaving. Weren’t you, Nessie?»

Renesmée forced a smile. «I really want to play,» she said.

Jasper followed Jacob inside, that light frown still on his face. His walk seemed somehow smoother than usual, more silent.

Jacob turned slowly from Renesmée to Jasper. «What the hell have you been telling her?»

Jasper blinked. «What do you mean?»

«I think you know just fine what I mean,» Jacob said, and took a step towards Jasper.

In a flash, Carlisle was inside the room, his eyes wide as he looked from Jasper and Jacob. «Jacob, is there anything the matter?»

Jacob snorted. «You would know.»

Bella darted into the room, Edward following less than a second after.

«Nessie, we’re leaving,» Bella told Renesmée, and pulled her up.

«Momma, wait—» Renesmée began, but she was halfway across the room already.

It really wasn’t fair, that vampires should be so much stronger than hybrids.

«Carlisle,» Edward was saying, trying and failing to look give an easy-going smile, «could we please talk in private?»

Carlisle looked at the room around him, at Edward staring intently at him, at Jacob glaring, at Bella who was pulling at Renesmée, and at Renesmée herself, who could feel her vision start to blur again.

«Not now, Edward,» he said absentmindedly, his attention on Bella and Renesmée. «Bella, forgive my asking, but— did something happen on Isle Esme?»

«That’s what Edward wants to talk to you about,» Bella replied.

«And it’s not a conversation appropriate for Nessie to be a part of,» Jacob added sharply, directed at Carlisle.

Carlisle blinked, first in confusion, then his eyes widened.

And, tellingly, his eyes flickered towards Edward not a moment later, the way everyone in Renesmée’s family would look to Edward when they’d had a thought they hoped he hadn’t caught.

Jacob snorted derisively.

Edward stiffened, having heard— something. Renesmée couldn’t speculate on what, that would give too much away.

Edward’s eyes snapped towards her, something blazing hot within them, so intense that she took an involuntary step back.

«I think,» Carlisle said slowly, «that this just became a private family meeting. Jacob, I don’t mean to be rude, but if you could return tomorrow morn—»

«Like hell!» Jacob protested. «What, do you think I’m gonna help you cover up your dirty secrets?»

«Excuse me now?» Emmett asked, and Renesmée heard the floor creaking ever so slightly as he got up to stand on his full weight.

«I’m confused,» Rosalie stated.

«Love to help,» Alice quipped, «sadly I’m blind.»

«What’s happening in here?» Esme said, finally entering the room.

Jasper said nothing, he only watched silently.

And Renesmée knew that there would be no keeping his secrets for Carlisle after this. Now everyone knew there were secrets, and her family would not stop asking him until they were in the know, too.

She’d never felt worse, more like a traitor, in her life.

There was no helping the tears as they started streaming down her face.

«Oh my god, Nessie!» Rosalie exclaimed, and in an instant, she, Esme, and Bella were all surrounding Renesmée, fuzzing over her.

«P-please don’t—» she tried to say, but she found herself burying her face in her hands instead, and giving in to sobs.

«That’s it,» Bella said, «I’m getting her out of here.»

She hoisted Renesmée up into her arms, nevermind that she was so much tinier than her daughter.

Renesmée peaked through her fingers to see Carlisle looking at her in only concern, not a trace of judgement in his golden eyes.

It was more than she could bear.

«I had a dream!» she blurted, before Bella could leave the room, desperate for him to know she hadn’t betrayed him on purpose.

Carlisle looked confused again for a moment, before realization dawned. «Oh. Oh, I see.»

«Could someone please explain from the beginning what everyone’s talking about?» Emmett demanded.

«Fine, I will!» Jacob said. Then, before a stricken Edward could move to stop him, he said, «Carlisle told Nessie some really inappropriate things about his sex life, including that he had sex with Aro back in the day. Jasper’s been telling her a bunch of lies too, about how nobody loves her. She had a nightmare about it, and now they’re trying to keep this under wraps.»

The room was silent, except for Renesmée’s miserable short breaths.

Even Bella seemed to have forgotten about leaving, she just stood there, as frozen as the other vampire occupants in the room.

Slowly, ever so slowly, Carlisle reached up to pinch the bridge of his nose. «Go home, Jacob,» he finally said.

Jacob blanched. «You can’t—»

«I can, actually,» Carlisle said, still in that same, tired, tone. «This family needs to have a conversation, and that means this family only. Now leave, Jacob, please.»

«You can’t just—»

«Alright,» Emmett sighed, and placed a heavy hand on Jacob’s shoulder. «you heard the man. Sorry, Jake, but this— erm. We’ll see you tomorrow.»

«You think I’m leaving you guys to tell her more lies?!» Jacob demanded. «She needs someone on her side!»

«We weren’t asking,» Jasper said, and there was a tone of finality to his voice as he came up to place a hand on Jacob’s other shoulder.

It only seemed to make Jacob angrier.

«Can’t he just stay?» Bella asked. «He’s as good as family already, and he’ll find out from Nessie or me anyway.»

«Yeah!» Jacob chimed in.

«Or maybe,» Edward tried, «Carlisle and I could have a private conversation first, and then—»

«Is the private conversation going to be you asking me about the things Jacob just said?» Carlisle asked point blank.

«No!» Edward protested, a touch of despair in his voice. «I don’t believe a word of that. Renesmée had a silly dream, we all got a bit ahead of ourselves with hasty conclusions, and— and—»

His voice faltered, and he stared at Carlisle with pure and unfiltered horror in his eyes.

Bella’s arms around Renesmée tightened.

Carlisle sighed, and looked Edward right in the eye. «It’s correct that I had an affair with Aro when I stayed with him in Volterra. Renesmée found out by accident and, understandably, she had a lot of questions, questions which I answered as openly as I could. I’m happy to do the same with you.»

The room froze completely.

«As for Jacob’s accusations about Jasper, I can’t imagine those are true. Jasper?» Carlisle asked, carrying on as if he hadn’t just detonated a verbal nuclear missile in the living room as he turned towards his blond son.

Jasper blinked once. «No, can’t say that I have.»

Renesmée nodded, eager to do anything, anything at all, to help. «That’s right, in the dream you just seemed to be the voice of my subconscious, or something. It was a dream about English class, and you’re the one who’s been teaching English, so… Dreams are weird.»

No one said anything to that.

A broken sob escaped Edward.

With a start, Bella snapped to. «Nessie, we’re leaving,» she said, and without further ado she’d zipped out the front door with Renesmée in her arms.

They were at the cottage within minutes, and Renesmée found herself bundled into bed by a Bella who was distressed in a way she hadn’t been since—

Since the Volturi.

Bella kissed her on her forehead, ordered her to sleep, and then she was gone.

Renesmée blinked up at the ceiling above her in mild surprise.

She was alone.

She could sleep on her own, should perhaps do so, she hadn’t slept in a very long while.

But before she could think anything further in that direction, she found herself

she would sleep for hours, and her parents would in all likelihood return before that. Or Jacob, even, if he decided she needed guarding.

And after what they’d found in her mind last time they looked, they wouldn’t want to

Perhaps, then, she should use this time to meditate instead, to think openly and to process properly all the things that had happened and all the things she’d learned. Let her walls down and allow her thoughts to wander freely in every which direction, dropping by each of Carlisle’s surviving secrets in the hopes of wrapping them up just that tighter

But—

How would she know when Edward was approaching?

If she let even one more secret slip unduly, after spilling such a great one…

No meditating, then.

Renesmée drew the cover higher up over her shoulder, and turned to face the wall.

She really ought to sleep now that she had the chance.

She closed her eyes, tried to will herself away from the waking world.

But the moments turned into minutes, and hours, until she heard her parents’ approaching footsteps several hours later, without having slept even for a second.

#my fic #bleach on the brain #deleted scenes #renesmée cullen

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barnes-dameron · 3 years

Text

Warmth

Part Two to Heat Signatures

*not my gif

The Mandalorian x reader

Summary: After learning about your true feelings for him, the Mandalorian decides to do something about it...

Word Count: 2.7k

A/N: Finally got around to finishing it. No spoilers, this is essentially smut but with a little fluff. Catch up with Heat Signatures

***

The Mandalorian reached forward and pressed the switch on the wall, the door to his bunk sliding open. Light flooded into the dark room, revealing you sitting on his poor excuse of a bed, and the kid in the make-shift hammock that hung right above you. Din was met with your wide eyes, your chest heaving a bit.

“What do you want?” you asked, your tone not harsh but not welcoming either.

“We need to talk,” Din replied, keeping his own voice even before he says too much.

“I don’t think there’s anything for us to talk about,” you whispered, looking away from him towards the corner of the bunk.

Din looked up to the sleeping Child, and his paternal instincts kicked in. The kid could wake up any minute now, creating an out for you. If it happened, Din couldn’t think of another way to approach you, or another opportunity for that matter. He let out a sigh.

“I’m going to close the door and go to the cockpit,” he instructed. “I expect you to be there in two minutes. We need to talk, but we can’t disturb the kid.”

He left it at that. He didn’t wait for your response, and didn’t say anything about the questioning look on your face. Din reached over, shut the door, and climbed up to the cockpit.

There was a moment when he began to panic when he thought you wouldn’t come. Din sat in the pilot’s seat, trying to calm his racing heart beat by looking at the never ending space before him. But the echo of your boots climbing the metal rungs drove him out of his own thoughts. He turned in his seat to see you standing near the entrance awkwardly.

Din watched you finger the edge of your jacket, your feet shifting back and forth every now and then, and your head tilted towards the ground, but your eyes were on him.

“What did you want to talk about?” you asked, your voice just above a whisper.

Din felt his mouth go dry like a desert on Tatooine. He knew he wanted to talk to you, but the words that he had planned left him. Din wasn’t an overly sentimental person, and had trouble voicing his feelings and emotions. With his Creed and line of work, he expressed himself more through actions. But with you, he could try, even if it’ll come out messy.

“I have feelings for you,” Din revealed, each word coming out slowly. His head pounded from the stress of the situation. It was easier to fire his blaster at a bounty than what he’s doing right now. He took a deep breath before continuing. “I’ve had them for awhile. I didn’t say anything before because I didn’t know how you would feel.”

So that was lie, but at the last minute, Din decided he would rather lie to you about that than rather telling you he was aware of your feelings from his little experiment. He hated to put you on the spot like that.

The entire time, Din wasn’t even looking at you. He reverted his gaze to the floor, but kept his helmet straight to give off the illusion that he was maintaining eye contact. When he did look at you, your eyes were wide with your mouth slightly open. He could see the rapid rise and fall of your chest, your hands now at your sides.

“I have feelings for you too,” you breathed out. “I didn’t say anything, because I believed you only thought of me as just a caregiver.”

“Far from it,” Din said without thinking.

It was then that Din got an idea. He stood up from his chair, and reached behind him to grab the cape that hung off his shoulders. Din ripped off a strip of the cloth, before going to stand right before you. You looked at him with curious eyes, as Din held the cloth in his hands.

“I want to do something,” he breathed out. “But I need you to trust me.”

“With my life,” you affirmed, giving him a smile.

Din felt his heart flutter at your comment. He reached up and tied the cloth around your eyes, securing the knot so that it was tight enough to not to fall off your face but not too tight that it would hurt you. He brought his hands away from your head towards his own, reaching to unlatch his helmet.

It was thrilling for Din to look at you with his own eyes and not through the visor. He could see how soft your cheeks look, the texture of your hair, and the smoothness of the lips he has fantasized about. He relished in feeling your gentle breath fan his face. So much stimuli for him, and he has yet to touch you. Din put his helmet on the passenger seat beside him, and then pulled off his gloves to do the same.

His breath was shaking when he reached up to cup your face in his hands. You flinched a bit, but then relaxed against him, letting out a sigh that he took as pleasure. Din traced his thumb across your cheekbone, memorizing the feel before this moment is over. But his eyes were drawn to your lips; he couldn’t help himself any longer. Din bent down, bringing his face to you, his lips hovering over yours. His heart beat against his rib cage. He’s never kissed anyone in his life, and fear was gripping him in this moment. What if he did it wrong? What if you didn’t like it? What if you didn’t feel anything?

He was so caught up in his head, that it was you who reached up, wrapped your arms around his shoulders, and pressed your lips to his. Din was surprised at first, but then melted into it. Your lips were softer than he imagined they would be much to his delight. Your lips were molding perfectly with his, moving in sync as if they were meant to be together. Din brought his hands away from your face, to grip your hips, bringing your body to press against his. You licked against his lips, and Din’s granted you access. He was slowly getting a hang of this. His tongue battled with yours, but it was you who gave in. He took this opportunity to explore your mouth, indulging in your sweet taste. If it wasn’t for the Creed, he’d never stop kissing you.

You pulled away slightly, keeping your hands on him. Din opened his eyes, and leaned his forehead against yours, catching his breath. He watched you smile, and he couldn’t help the one spreading across his face.

“Can I ask you something?” you questioned, your voice much more uplifting compared to before.

“Anything,” Din replied, placing another kiss on your cheek.

“Was that your first kiss?” you asked, bringing a hand to rest on his cheek.

“It was,” he revealed, pulling away as his eyes darted to avoid your gaze even though it wasn’t on him. “How did I do?”

“Amazing,” you replied.

Din grabbed your other hand, bringing it to the other side of his face.

“You could touch me,” Din whispered. He felt your fingers rub across the scruff of his cheeks, scratching slightly which almost caused him to whimper in delight. Your fingers traveled to his nose, tracing the bridge before running over his lips. Then your hands went to his hair, curling in the locks while rubbing his scalp. Din wanted to give you this moment to explore the man beneath the beskar, but his own desire was bubbling up within him. He remembered the red spot that showed up between your thighs when he was looking through his thermal tech. Din’s hands caressed your hips, as he brought his lips back to yours, causing your grip in his hair to tighten. “I want you to touch me, to feel me...like how I want to feel you,” he mumbled against your lips.

You pulled back from him, panic rising within Din in fear that he went too far. But that quickly subsided when you pulled off your jacket.

“I want that too,” you replied.

Din smiled to himself as he watched you take off your clothes, one by one. His eyes traced over every new found skin that was revealed. He began to take off his armor as well, setting it on the floor and then piling his clothes on top of his helmet in the passenger’s seat. A chill went through him as the cold air of the ship hit his skin, but the heat at his core never wavered. His cock was erect and pulsing, needing to be touched. Precum was collecting at the head and was threatening to drip onto the floor.

Din looked up at you, the sight making his cock harder which he thought was impossible. You were completely bare to him; your nipples were perked and hardened, and he didn’t need his helmet to see you were wet and ready for him. Din reached out, and grabbed your hand, leading you forward as he moved back. He admired the way you walked blindfolded, not stumbling in the slightest. You really did trust him.

Din sat back down at the pilot’s seat, bring your knees up on either side of him. You straddled his waist, resting your hands on top of his shoulders, tracing a pattern onto his skin. Din gripped your hips while looking at your figure, completely mesmerized by the goddess before him. Din trailed his one hand down, over the expanse of your thigh towards your core. He heard your breath hitch, and he stopped his movements, looking up to see any indication that you didn’t want this.

“Go on,” you breathed out. “I want you, Mando.”

That was all he needed. Din dipped a finger into your dripping core, causing you to let out a moan of pleasure. He dragged his finger along your velvet walls, can’t waiting to put his cock in this hidden paradise. Din pulled out his finger completely as you whined, but he immediately replaced it with two. He watched as you threw your head back, and rock your hips against his hand. He continued to thrust his fingers into your heat, your hips matching his pace. He dug his fingers so deep that his thumb unknowingly brushed against your clit. You let out a cry of pleasure, your grip on his shoulders tightening. Din took note of this, and rubbed tight circles over your bundle of nerves while continuing to pump his fingers into your cunt.

“Mando,” you panted. “I-I’m c-close.”

He picked up his pace, all the while watching your face. He wished he could see your eyes, wanting to see you fall apart completely. Your back straightened, your head thrown back, and your movements ceased. Din felt your walls tighten against his fingers accompanying it with a cry of his nickname.

Din pulled his fingers out, watching as he did so. His fingers were coated in your juices, causing him to groan. He dropped his hand to his cock, coating it in your cum as he pumped himself to give him some sort of relief.

“Mando,” you let out, caressing the back of his neck. “Mando, I want you.”

Din gripped his cock, positioning it at your entrance as he leaned his head against your chest.

“You have me,” he said, bringing your hips down to be flushed with his. “You’ll always have me.”

Din grunted at the feel of your tight hot walls against his cock. Your slick from your orgasm made it easy for him to slip in. You moaned as he sheathed himself fully in you. He lifted your hips up before dragging you down on him again. He set a slow pace, wanting to take his time to feel your soft wet walls against his cock. It was hard for him of course. The feel of you could cause him to let go right then and there. But he didn’t want this to be a desperate fuck. He wanted to make love to you.

Din looked up at your face; your mouth agape as you let you sighs of contentment, your skin glistening from the thin layer of sweat that was collecting. Your breasts were pushed up in the air as you bowed your back. Din leaned forward, and attached his mouth to your left breast. He sucked your nipple into his mouth, rolling the tight bud with his tongue. Your gripped on his hair as a moan escaped your lips. Din groaned, and he brought his hand to your other breast, rubbing your pebbled nipple with his fingers. Your hands dropped to his shoulders, squeezing his shoulders as you tried to catch your breath. Din let go of your left breast, switching over to your other one to give it the same treatment and attention.

You began to thrust your hips faster, changing the pace which Din didn’t mind at all. Din let go of your breasts, bringing one hand on top of your hip and the other to your clit. Din was close to his release, but he wanted you to reach that finish line with him. He rubbed your clit with his thumb and forefinger as he snapped his hips to meet yours.

“Mando,” you cried. “I’m close, I’m so close.”

Din kept up his pace, until he felt your walls squeeze his cock as you reached your climax. Din lost his self control. His thrusts became erratic as your cunt milked his cock. He sheathed himself fully before he stilled as his cum shooted deep within, painting your walls. Din rested his head against your sternum, panting as his cock softened within your cunt. He placed kisses wherever his lips met your skin, coming down from his climax. Your hand rested in his hair, stroking his growing locks as you too calmed from your high.

“You don’t know how long I have been wanting this, Mando,” you said.

“Din,” he mumbled.

“What?”

“Din,” he repeated. “My name is Din.” Even though he couldn’t see your eyes, Din suspected that they would be wide with shock and confusion. But he knew exactly what he was doing. “You have me, and because of that, you’ll have me as truly am. And I am Din Djarin.”

He pulled himself away from your chest, to look at your face. Din felt heat arise in him and bloom in his chest as you gave him a smile. That damn smile.

“Din,” you said, testing the name out on your tongue. “It suits you.”

He let out a huff of laughter as he wrapped his arms around your waist, embracing you. You too wrapped your arms around his shoulders, pressing your cheek to the top of his head. Din savored the warmth that you were radiating, soaking it up before returning to his armor and helmet.

And even though he didn’t want to, Din pulled away. He was sure that you were probably tired of the blindfold that graced your face. With a groan, he pulled you off his lap, his cock instantly missing the heat that it was in.

You stood up before him as Din reached over and grabbed his helmet and cape. Reluctantly, he slid the helmet over his head. He then placed the cloak around your own shoulders before dragging you back to sit in his lap. Your back was pressed to his chest as he reached his hands up to undo the tie of your blindfold.

Once the simple piece of cloth was off, you laid your head on his shoulder, a smile spread across your face as you looked at him with awe and love. Din felt himself smile in return. He rubbed his hands up and down your thighs, basking in your warmth and the post-orgasmic haze.

“Wow,” you said, looking up.

Din hummed, imploring you to continue even though he was too involved in touching you to look at what you were talking about.

“We really fogged up the window,” you laughed, rubbing your hands over his forearms.

Din looked up and saw it. The windows of the cockpit were fogged up, blurring out the stars and passing planets completely. He hummed again in amusement.

“Amazing to think what heat can do,” Din said.

***

Taglist: @absurdthirst @tangledlove27 @16boyfriends-and-me @sunflowergirl522 @equalstrashflavoredtrash @persephonehemingway

#din djarin x reader #the mandalorian #mandalorian x reader #mandalorain #din djarin #star wars #sw #Pedro Pascal #pedro pascal x reader #the mandalorian season two #the mandalorian season one #Smut #fluff

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ahkaahshi · 4 years

Text

a parenting moment [miya atsumu x reader]

pairing: miya atsumu x fem reader

genre: fluff

warning(s): none

word count: 2.3k

overview: when yours and atsumu’s five-year-old daughter gets into trouble at school, it’s up to him to practice his good parenting skills

note: though this is a reader insert story, it focuses more on atsumu’s relationship with his daughter and sheds some light on how I think he would be as a dad :) also I wrote this months ago and am just now posting lol hope you enjoy

Atsumu’s features settle into a look of discontentment as his honey colored eyes scan his young daughter’s short figure, taking note of her dirtied shoes and the slightly disheveled appearance of the French braids he’d woven into her dark hair that morning. Wiping a bead of sweat from his forehead and letting out a small sigh, he asks, “What happened, girly?”

She turns her (e/c) gaze towards the polished wooden flooring of the large gym and mutters, “I got in a fight at school and they made Mommy pick me up.”

Instead of towering over her, as he had inadvertently been doing before, Atsumu kneels down in front of her and places his hand on her shoulder. “Hey, look at me, (daughter’s name),” he requests, making her tilt her chin up the smallest amount so her eyes can meet his. When their gazes connect, he purses his lips before saying, “We’ll talk about it when we get home, ‘kay? Right now, Daddy’s gotta practice, so jus’ sit tight with Coach Foster for a bit ‘n hang out.”

She nods slowly and Atsumu lifts her light blue backpack off of her shoulders to carry it with him over to the bench beside the court where his team is currently running through serve-receive drills. The head coach gives him a small nod of acknowledgement and a promise that he’ll protect her from any rogue volleyballs as she takes a seat.

Knowing that his daughter’s safety is in good hands and that she’s occupied--since she had pulled out a notebook from her backpack to doodle and write in--gives Atsumu a sliver of comfort as he returns to his practice. It takes himself some time to get his thoughts off of her, however, given the situation.

Minutes earlier, you had appeared at the gym with (daughter’s name) and offered a brief explanation of the matter at hand. You’d had to pick her up from school after receiving a call that she’d gotten into trouble, but, because of your own responsibilities at work, you’d had to drop her off with your husband. According to what the teachers had explained, she had gotten into a physical altercation with another student that had ended in tears, screaming, a few scrapes, and a dropped popsicle--your daughter’s, unfortunately.

(Daughter’s name) was a well-behaved, studious girl--though she did have a bit of a wild, energetic streak in her, thanks to Atsumu--so to hear that she’d been involved in a fight was understandably shocking to both of you. Sure, she enjoyed roughhousing with her dad and her uncle, but you’d been adamant about reiterating that real fighting was not allowed.

Atsumu hated seeing his daughter so distressed. It broke his heart. Usually, she was upbeat and full of life, but, now, she looks so defeated and ashamed. In an attempt to cheer her up in any way he can, he enlists the help of Bokuto and Hinata to tell her funny stories during each water break; and while they provide her some temporary relief, the cloud of sadness casting a shadow over her still lingers.

Though she holds onto his hand and clings to his side during the commute back home, she’s unnaturally quiet, and goes straight to her room upon returning to the house. He decides it best to leave her alone for a bit, but he can’t ignore how quiet the house feels without the sound of her favorite show blaring from the television in the living room. To busy himself for some time while you’re at work and she’s in her room, Atsumu sets himself to whipping up a snack after he’s taken a shower, and icing his aching joints.

After preparing some onigiri that looks rather sloppy compared to that his brother always serves, Atsumu shuffles down the hallway towards his daughter’s room. Her door is open, so he can see her sitting on her bed with a selection of colored pencils strewn across the comforter, and one in her hand that she’s using to color in a project she has to complete for class.

“Hey, girly,” he greets her and stands in the doorway, “Wanna eat some onigiri with me?”

She doesn’t respond verbally, but nods her head without lifting it to look over at him. So, he walks into her room and plops down on the bed beside her, setting the plate down in front of him. Before he can even get so far as to offer her one of his homemade creations, he hears her sniffle loudly.

Turning his honey-colored gaze to her brings him to the realization that she's stopped coloring and, instead, has her hands pressed against her face as her body shakes with quiet sobs. His paternal instincts to protect and comfort her immediately kick in, and he pushes the plate aside so he can sling an arm around her shoulder to pull her closer to him.

“Hey, hey, li’l princess, what’s goin’ on?” he murmurs.

She leans closer to him but keeps her hands over her face. “It wasn’t my fault, Daddy,” she whimpers softly, the sound of her strained voice nearly shattering her father’s heart, “There’s a really, really mean girl in my class. She always pulls my hair, a-and takes my markers, and cuts in line so she gets the last orange popsicle--and that’s my favorite flavor--and... I hate her!”

Atsumu grabs a tissue to dab at the tears spilling down her cheeks once he gently moves her hands away from her face. He’s silent for a moment as the previous sadness he felt at his daughter’s suffering morphs into anger upon hearing that she was being bullied. “Didja hit ‘er 'cause she was bein’ mean?”

She nods and cries, “S-She pushed me during recess ‘nd I got mad and pushed her back,” before finally lifting her head to gaze up at him with watery, (e/c) eyes. “I didn’t mean to hurt her, Daddy! I-I was just scared she was gonna hurt me!”

Wrapping both of his arms around her small frame, Atsumu brings her face to his chest and holds her tightly in his embrace in an attempt to comfort her. “It’s alright, (daughter’s name). Mommy ‘nd I will make sure this gets fixed, ‘kay?” The grip she has on the back of his t-shirt tightens slightly as she presses her face into his shoulder. One of his hands rubs her back to calm her down while the other smooths down any stray hairs sticking up from her head.

After a few minutes of crying, whimpering, and venting, she’s finally relaxed enough to let her dad lead her into the living room so they can sit and watch a few episodes of her favorite show together while snacking on onigiri.

“Hey,” he calls out to her, making her tear her wide-eyed gaze away from the television screen, “I know me, Mommy, ‘n Uncle ‘Samu always say that fightin’ ain’t the right way ta go about things, but I’m proud of ya for stickin’ up for yourself, girly.”

A small smile sprouts across her lips that’s made even cuter by the fact that her cheeks are puffing out from the amount of rice she has in her mouth. The sight makes him chuckle and ruffle her hair.

“But don’t go tellin’ Mommy I said that. Instead, use yer words, find one of the teachers, ‘n let ‘em deal with whoever’s givin’ ya trouble, alright?”

When she’s finished chewing her food, she replies, “M’kay.”

“Mind tellin’ me what started the fight in the first place?” he asks, one of his thick eyebrows raising in curiosity.

She twiddles her thumbs and slowly directs her gaze back to the television. “She made me drop my popsicle when she pushed me.”

“And it was your favorite flavor, wasn’t it?”

“Yeah...”

With a hearty laugh, he comments, “Man, you really are yer mom’s daughter, ya know that? She don’t mess around when food’s involved.”

The sounds of his daughter's giggles ripple through the air, sending waves of warmth over him as he continues telling her stories about all the times he’d dealt with you getting on his case about food or treat-related issues. He made sure to include an anecdote about a time when you’d nearly knocked him over after he’d jokingly swiped your candy bar during lunch in high school.

Needless to say, he never did it again out of the fear that Osamu wouldn't let him live it down if he got destroyed by a high school girl over food. However, the passion and unrelenting desire he’d seen in your eyes that day had made him absolutely sure that you were the one for him.

By the time you step into the house a few hours later, your daughter--being the mature, young girl she was--has moved her schoolwork from her bedroom to the living room table to do her assignments while her dad snoozes on the couch. Upon noticing that she’s in a better mood than she had been when you’d dropped her off at the gym with Atsumu, your heart lifts slightly.

“Hey, honey,” you greet her as you slide off your shoes and set your purse down on a table in the entryway, “What’re you up to?”

She holds up a piece of paper with colored markings on it that vaguely resemble Atsumu’s tall figure holding what you assume to be a volleyball, along with a few, familiar faces in the background. “I have to draw a picture of what you and Daddy do at work to show my teacher.”

You smile at her and plant a kiss atop her head before commenting, “Looks good so far. You drew Bokuto-san’s hair perfectly.” She chuckles and quickly returns to her masterpiece, since your compliment seems to spur her to keep creating. “I’m gonna talk to Daddy, real quick, okay? I wanna see how you draw Omi-san’s hair when we’re done.”

With that said and your daughter on a mission to produce her version of the prickly, outside hitter on Atsumu’s team, you rouse your husband from his nap so the two of you can head into your room to talk about the situation. Once out of earshot, he explains what your daughter had told him and the two of you work together to devise a plan and time to speak with her teacher about the true story. Amazingly enough, this entire exchange occurrs without your usual, good-natured--but sometimes cumbersome--squabbling.

“Hey, ‘Tsumu,” you call out to him, reaching for his hand and wrapping your fingers around it gingerly.

He had been on his way to the bedroom door so he could head to the kitchen and start making dinner while you showered, but he stops in his tracks and turns to face you once more. When your eyes meet, your heart skips a beat, like always.

Taking a deep breath, you tell him, “Even though we may argue from time to time about parenting, and you sometimes let her have just a tad too much sugar before conveniently deciding to take a nap so you don’t have to deal with her going berserk, there's nobody else in the world that I’d rather share a kid with than you. She loves you so much, and so do I.”

His unoccupied hand finds your waist to pull you closer to him, and he leans down towards you to plant a gentle kiss on your lips. As per usual, the tender moment you shared doesn’t last long, since he always has something smart to say. “What’s gotcha all sentimental, (f/n)? Does seein’ me doin’ fatherly things give ya the hots for me, or somethin’?”

“Oh, yeah, sleeping on the couch while our self-starter of a child does homework by herself is so fatherly.”

He frowns. “I had a long practice. Bein’ a professional athlete is hard work, baby.”

With a sardonic smile on your face, you mention, “Working a nine-to-five is pretty tiring too, baby.”

“Fair,” he groans and slides his arms around your back, “But, seriously, what’s got you feelin’ all in love with me, huh?”

You snicker at his tone and the mischievous look on his face as you brush his golden hair away from his eyes before letting your hands come to rest on his cheeks. “It’s just that when I picked (daughter’s name) up from school today, she was all sad and mopey. Yet, when I come home after dropping her off with you, she’s all smiles and rainbows again. It just reminds me of how good you are to her and it makes me happy that she has you as a father.”

A genuine smile rather than a sly one appears on his lips, and you press your own against them to give him a few, affectionate kisses.

“You know I’d do anything for my favorite, li’l girl, (f/n). She’s only as good of a kid as she is 'cause of you, anyway.”

Your lips form a giddy grin, as if he’s a high school crush who’s just delivered the sweetest of compliments to you, and you allow him to pull you closer so he can shower you with more kisses. “I love you, baby,” you murmur as you plant another peck on his cheek.

“I love you too, sweetheart.”

There’s a short moment of silence as he pulls you into a tight hug that seems to wash away all the stress that you didn't even realize had been building up within you at the day you’ve had. His breath fans across the tender skin of your neck when he nestles his face there and allows his hands to roam up and down your back. However, after the two of you release each other, you notice a sneaky smile playing at his lips that oftentimes makes you wary.

“Hey.”

“Yeah?”

“Wanna go see (daughter’s name)’s rendition of Omi-Omi?”

Chuckling and following him out of the bedroom, you agree, “Wouldn’t miss it.”

masterlist ⭐︎ treat me to a coffee!

taglists (see pinned post on my blog for form)

general: @krynnza, @yamagucji, @tendo-sxtori, @dinablossom, @newfriendjen, @devlovesramen, @ohbyunhunn, @aftcrlust, @mister-future, @kyleclxin, @kac-chowsballs, @osamusmiya, @nit-sir-hc, @arixtsukki, @shinsurou, @ichorizaki, @dominikmagnus

atsumu: @pretty-setters, @misora-msby, @why-aminot-dead, @lotsoffandomrecs, @tsumue, @heyhinata

#haikyuu x reader #miya atsumu x reader #atsumu x reader #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu!!#hq!!#x reader #reader insert #anime #manga #miya atsumu #fran writes hq!!

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kailedger · 4 years

Text

for all the YOI fanfic authors

I’ve been reading a lot of fanfics in this particular fandom and, as a Russian, there’s like... little things that constantly bother me. Don’t get me wrong, the works are amazing, but every time I see this little innacurate details in a really good piece I’m like... slightly dissapointed lol

So here’s a couple things from a native speaker and someone who actually lives in Russia. (Also pardon my grammar, since English is not my first language).

NAMES. I couldn't stress it more, honestly. Here's the thing: most of Russian names have a full version and a short version. For example Victor (or Viktor, whichever you prefer) is the full version and Vitya is the short version. Sometimes I see authors using the short version, but most of the time it's described as something unusual (like Victor gets TOO excited to hear it from Yuuri). But in real life everyone in Russia will call him Vitya. It's not a big deal, the closest equivalent I can think of is this: if you wanna adress someone as Ms. or Mr., you can use the full name, but if two people are on the first name basis, in Russia they most likely will use the short version. So, like, Yakov, Yurio, Mila, Georgi will definitely call him Vitya (as I recall, in anime Yakov actually does? Or have I been reading too much fanfiction?).

If it's an official kind of thing (for example, press meetings etc.) Victor can be adressed by his full name, sometimes even with his paternal name. (Paternal names in Russia is a whole other thing, pretty close to second names, but a little bit different. We always adress elder people like teachers with both full name and paternal name). I actually think Victor would adress Yakov with his paternal name, but that heavely depends in their relationship (honestly, Victor has like zero chill, so I wouldn't put it past behind him to have no respect in this matter lol).

Oh, and Yurio's name is a mess in most fanfics. The full name would be Yuri, the short version is Yura. Since Otabek is from Kazakzstan, there's a very high chance he's actually fluent in Russian, so he would definitely use "Yura". The cutesy dimunitive would be Yurochka (not Yuratchka as it's stated in the anime subtitles), but it's only appropriate to use with a big age difference (like Yurio's granpa calling him that) or in a really sweet manner, to a point of being almost nauseating. (BTW, dimunitive from Vitya is Viten'ka).

Mila's full name doesn't actually have a short version, but if you're looking for a dimunitive it's Milochka (which is also the same word for "darling" in Russian, and this version can be kind of sarcastic, so be careful with it).

Georgi... Oh my God, where do I start lol. There's like two common short versions: Zhora or Gosha (sometimes even Goga, we have a very popular movie quote with this name, it's like a well-known joke for Russians).

Pet names. That's a whole other different level of hell. I often see people writing Victor using pet names, sometimes it's good, most of the times it makes me go "He would never use that, please, stop".

"Zolotse" as in "gold" is actually a pretty good one - altough it's a little conservative and not often used, it has a personal meaning for Victor and Yuuri and isn't, you know... cringy. But for the love of God, don't use "krasavchik" (handsome guy) or "detka" (baby), it's just... no. Miliy (darling), lyubov moya or lyubimiy (my love) are pretty good. A little too sweet for my taste, but I actually think it's appropriate for Victor since he's clingy lol.

Accents. So here's the thing. I lived my whole life in Russia, I learned English through some additional courses (not very advanced) and watching a lot of american/english tv-shows and movies and reading literature in english. When I had the chance to talk to native speakers (one was from Boston, I believe, and also a bunch of people in England when I went on a vacation there), most of them said that I barely had any accent at all.

Victor presumably has been participating in international events from a very young age. My point is - sure, he can have an accent, but in my opinion it's not gonna be very distinctive. Unless he's specifically speaking in a broken English, but, like, why would he do that? On the other hand, Yurio and Mila are both pretty young, so it would actually make sense for them to have an accent or even have trouble speaking English.

Customs and traditions. Pretty sure most people know it already, but in Russia we do wear our wedding rings on the right hand. Has something to do with our main religion being eastern orthodox church.

We don't usually celebrate Christmas. Our Christmas is on 7th of January and it's a pretty religious holiday, most of us barely acknowledge it. So 25th of December is not a holiday in Russia. But! New Year is the biggest holiday for the whole country. We celebrate it starting from 31st of December, and the celebration itself usually involves the New Year tree, champange, tangerines and a whole bunch of salads. We have official holidays from 31st of December all the way to 7th on January (some years even 8th or 9th). So it's a whole week of celebration where people usually get drunk a lot lol.

The stereotype about russians drinking a lot is not exactly a sterotype tbh. We DO drink a lot, not all of us, of course, but still. And yeah - vodka is pretty common since you can find it really cheap and it doesn't have a particular taste or smell (if you don't count the smell and taste of alcohol itself). But I, for example, prefer rum in my cocktails, so it's like a preference thing.

Not exactly a tradition or custom, but still fits here. Yeah, it can get pretty cold in Russia, especially in winter or late fall. But this winter (of 2019-2020) was pretty mild honestly, not a lot of snow and the temperature was rarely below -10 degrees celcium. And our summers can get unbearebly hot. Since the humidity in St. Petersburg is very high, it makes the hot weather even worse. Oh, yeah, and in St. P it rains A LOT. The city itself is pretty gloomy and dark, but that's kind of part of it's charm if you're into this kind of thing (some people are not, I've got a lot of friends from Moscow who hate St. P for being so moody).

Russia is also pretty big. The travel from St. P to Moscow is from 4 to 12 hours on train (depends on what train you're on) or 1.5 hour on plane. But both of those cities are in the western part of the country. Vladivostok (the city on the eastern coast) is actually closer to Japan than it's to St. P or Moscow (2 hour flight to Japan, 45 hour flight to St. P, crazy, right?)

Homophobia. Kinda heavy topic, beware. Russia is a homophobic country. Not to the point of same-sex relationship being a criminal offence, but propaganda, as our authorities would call it, is an administrative offence. And the court can judge A LOT of your actions as a propaganda, especially if you’re a public person. I mostly prefer to not dwell on this topic in fanfiction, I think even the creators of anime itself stated that there’s no homophobia in YOI world, so best stick to it, I guess? But if you wanna go for something realistic, here’s how it would have been in Russia. If Victor EVER publicly acknolewged being in a relationship with another man (like... kissing one on a national televion, ya know), he would be heavely criticized. There would still be supporters, people who would say that it doesn’t matter, what his personal life is like, but there would be a lot of backlash, especially on official level. Which would make his life in Russia pretty miserable tbh. He would most likely lose a majority of his sponsorships in Russia, there’s even a high chance of administrative penalty (since he’s a public person). That’s really sad and makes me very, very angry, but, unfortunatly, that’s the reality. Oh, and same-sex marriage is illegal in Russia, in case that wasn’t clear.

Phew, that was a lot, and I think I haven’t covered all that I wanted to lol. But in case you have any question, feel free to ask!

p.s.: part two, if you’re interested: https://kailedger.tumblr.com/post/621623611041759232/for-all-the-yoi-fanfic-author-p2

#yoi #yuri on ice #yuuri on ice #victor nikiforov #viktor nikirofov #yuuri katsuki #victuuri #viktuuri #fanfiction

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usernoneexistent · 3 years

Text

Getting there, part numero tres of the ultimate MC ask. Let’s get into it.

51. Do they join to the Battle of Hogwarts (either sides)?

Not exactly, Juniper was nearby with Jacob, Ismelda, Penny, Andre and Jae plus others helping bring in supplies to Hogwarts when they were attacked by death eaters which they were able but had some losses. When they manage to defeat the death eaters, the battle was over and that’s when they find out more of their friends have died.

52. What would MC name their children if they had any?

Juniper does end up having a daughter post battle of Hogwarts, whom she named Tarragon Rowan. Juniper always knew that if she ever had a child that their middle name would Rowan.

53. Do they interfere with Harry Potter's time at Hogwarts (i.e. mess with canon)?

Mostly no, I guess Juniper ending up with Charlie counts but it’s a slow burn and they try to keep it low key.

54. Does MC have a sweet sour or savory tooth?

She has a sweet tooth.

55. What is MC'S opinion on House Elves?

All house elves should be free elves!

56. Do they get to interact with Harry Potter at some point?

Yes, she does. Juniper was originally suppose to meet Harry in 1995 to be the new DADA teacher as Dumbledore knew that Juniper would most definitely help prepare the students defensive charms (and maybe how to fight offensively) since good old Voldemort was back. But her letter saying that she accepted the position but it got ‘lost’ *cough* the ministry of magic was behind it *cough*. She didn’t meet Harry until the aftermath of the battle of Hogwarts in 1998.

57. What career would they join if they didn’t go into their chosen career?

Juniper would probably be an auror or a travelling journalist and most likely will notice how the MoM is quite corrupt and would try and change or at the very least, try and get the public aware but MoM will try and shut her up. She likes any job that requires adventure, exploring and trouble.

58. What does MC's parents think of the Cursed Vaults?

Her father, Jalil thought the cursed vaults were bogus and since he was living in Algeria at the time, he didn’t see the newspaper so he lived in denial for a long time until he finally saw Jacob in the flesh. Julia, Juniper’s mother on the other did act as if Jacob was wrong about the cursed vaults but when the news came and confirmed the cursed vaults, Julia fully believed Jacob and Juniper and they both realise that she definitely hiding something.

59. MC’s relationships with their sibling(s)?

To Juniper, Jacob is her biggest role model and influence in her life. Before Jacob disappeared, she liked how protective Jacob is and saw him as her rock but when he disappeared, it shattered her perception and left her with abandonment issue and trust issues. When they reunited, Juniper was fully relieved to find him but also angry for leaving her. It didn't help Jacob with his guilt and it took a long time before their relationship finally got back to a good place again.

60. Does MC have a relatively big or small family?

Juniper grew up in relatively small family, mainly consisting of her, Jacob, mum, dad, paternal grandparents, paternal uncle and aunt by marriage. She does have a great aunt + family in America but she isn’t so tight knit with them. Later in life though she does gain a huge family through Charlie whom she really adores (except for Percy) and have a surprise child.

61. How tall is MC?

1.63m or 5′3ft (cause Americans and Brits out there be struggling with he metric system for height)

62. Mention one good childhood memory of MC

When Juniper visited Edinburgh for the first time with Jacob. They lived in Fife which isn’t that far and their mum said no after begging her, so one day when Jacob was babysitting Juniper he took her and they manage to figure out how to use a bus to get to Edinburgh but it took a while and they got lost many time however they manage to find a way. It was really exciting for Juniper as this was her first time in the muggle world until they were caught by aurors as their parents panicked when they went missing.

63. MC's favourite Greek Goddess?

Hecate

64. MC's least favourite Greek Goddess?

Hera

65. Who's their favourite Weasley sibling?

Tough one but it has to be Charlie, simply because she loves him.

66. Does MC have some habits?

Yes, when she is particularly stressed, she struggles to sleep and wakes up usually round 2am and has to check the bath tub. There’s a reason for it but it’s something that Juniper rarely talks about it.

67. Does MC believe in aliens?

Juniper is open to the idea.

68. Where has MC lived over the years?

Juniper has been all over the world so just to make it easy, I’m going with where Juniper has lived for about 6 months +. In 1973 to 1991, she grew up in Fife, Scotland. After graduation in 1991, she and Talbott scraped money together and moved to London, England and most of her curse breaker assignments were in Africa. After she and Talbott break up in 1993, she accepts a more permanent assignment to Egypt and stays there for almost a year until she was fired from Gringotts because of Jacob. Between 1993 to 1998, she enters the more ambiguous phase as she becomes a successful free lancer curse breaker and just lives wherever she accepts a request, she was mostly in South America but did go to Asia a couple times. The only continents she has yet to visit is the Oceania and Antarctica. In 1998, Charlie asks Juniper to move with him in Romania and thats where she has been living so far.

69. Does MC believe in love at first sight?

Juniper would probably like to say no but in reality she is an absolute romantic at heart.

70. Would MC believe in science?

Most likely yes.

71. What would MC do if they lived in a pandemic?

Juniper would travel but would make sure to travel to more isolated places and would find herself immerse deep in nature and keep herself safe.

72. If MC could travel to anywhere in the world all fees payed for, where would they go?

Everywhere, I mean it’s part of her job to travel abroad wherever she’s needed.

73. If MC could time travel, where would they go?

That’s a hard one, Juniper finds there are son many time eras fascinating that by the time she chooses, her hair would be all grey.

74. Does MC have any bad habits?

She chews her fingers when she is stressed. Since Juniper represses her emotions, it builds up and often she lets it out in bursts of anger to those closet to her.

75. Describe a modern teen MC

Juniper would more or less stay mainly the same but she would be referencing memes and more likely inclined to find therapy or at least some professional help since there is more effort in putting mental health first.

#hphm oc asks #hogwarts mystery oc #juniper moss #jacob moss #hphm jacob #charlie weasley #cursed vaults #a little angsty #curse breaker #Mc taking care of mental wellbeing #Hphm family #part 3

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bloodfromthethorn · 3 years

Text

Broken Trust

Even now, hours later, he couldn’t shake the memory of Jack’s shoulder driving into his sternum, a too-tight grip on his bicep forcing him sideways as the man he trusted more than anyone else in the world physically moved through him rather than listen to what he had to say.

Tag to 2x02. Mac didn't walk away from his encounter with Jack as unscathed as he might wish to appear.

Also on AO3

Mac knew he was being stupid.

Yes, Jack threatening him with violence was no small matter and he was certainly justified in his surprise and betrayal, but he knew that he shouldn’t read any further into it. Jack had just been worried about Riley and hadn’t been thinking straight and in all likelihood, that was absolutely all it was. There was no deeper meaning, no hidden message. He shouldn’t be dwelling on it. He definitely shouldn’t be sitting on his deck at 3:30 in the morning contemplating all the times Jack had promised to have his back, to keep him safe, only to immediately turn on him when Mac put himself between his Overwatch and someone Jack cared about more.

It wasn’t like he didn’t get it: Jack had technically known Riley for far longer than he’d known Mac and he’d cared for her when she’d been a child – of course he was going to feel paternal. Mac had never been under any illusion that the relationship he had with Jack would outweigh that and he wouldn’t want it to, but he’d kind of thought that he still at least ranked somewhere near the top. Was that being presumptuous? A few days ago he wouldn’t have doubted it for a second, but now he couldn’t help but think maybe he’d been projecting his own feelings onto Jack and the reality of the situation was actually nothing like he’d thought it was.

But, then again, that was just a little overly dramatic, no? Jack had proven willing to go to the mat for Mac time and again, and this was the first time since their ill-fated meeting that the man had ever seemed willing to come to blows with him. They’d rib and tease each other, but he could count on the fingers of one hand the number of times there’d been true animosity between them. Mac’s quiet crisis of faith was surely nothing more than an overactive imagination and a history of being second choice to the people he loved.

And even if he wasn’t imagining anything, Jack had apologised for all of it – or at least he’d tried to. In the end, despite having waited to hear it, Mac had found that he just couldn’t stomach the thought of listening to Jack try to justify himself, to directly tell him that his loyalty to the woman who was basically his daughter was more important to him than his loyalty to Mac. Instead he’d shut down the apology before it could reach the light of day, brushing off Jack’s concern with a shrug and an easy smile. Better to let everyone think that it really was no big deal and was easily put behind them, no matter how far that might be from the truth. If Jack had had any notion of how badly Mac had been flying to pieces inside his own head, he hadn’t shown it.

So far as Mac could tell, everyone had mutually agreed that the whole thing had been a bizarre incident of heightened emotions with no deeper meaning and they could all quite happily sweep it under the rug and pretend it never happened. If only things were so simple for him.

It shouldn’t matter, he knew that. Jack had been going out of his mind with worry and Mac knew better than anyone how much he could overreact if someone he cared about was in trouble but at the same time… He’d put Mac in trouble. Mac wasn't in any doubt that if Riley hadn’t chosen that particular moment to convince Bedlam to trust her, he would be nursing a black eye – or worse – by now.

Worse still was that Bozer had also been in the unfortunate position of having to get between Jack and Riley that very same day and he’d managed to walk away entirely clean. Mac was unendingly grateful for that of course and he’d never wish any harm on his friend, but he couldn’t deny that it stung to know Jack wouldn’t raise a hand against Boze when he’d been perfectly happy to against Mac barely an hour earlier.

He ran a shaking hand through his hair for the hundredth time, huffing out a heavy breath as he battled to get his thoughts under control. This was normally what Jack was good at, helping him to get out of his own head and see the truth of things so he could work through the problem, but even if it hadn’t been the early hours, Mac wasn’t about to disturb him with this. Either he was wrong and being paranoid and there really wasn’t anything to worry about, or he was right and asking about it would mean having to hear one of his worst fears realised.

He wasn’t really up to confronting either outcome tonight.

Instead he was stuck out here, unable to sleep but too tied up in knots to try doing anything productive. The best he could manage was sitting beside the unlit firepit with a beer he hadn’t touched once. Letting himself go and getting drunk was distantly tempting, but work tomorrow was going to be tough enough as it was without throwing a hangover into the mix. Besides, if he did that, then people were going to ask questions and there really was no unembarrassing way of saying ‘I’ve been having a bit of a breakdown because a man I considered a brother nearly punched me in the face and I’m having to rethink a decade-long relationship.’

Mac’s usual approach to emotional problems had always been resorting to logic – with mixed results. It was all well and good to explain his childhood dog’s perpetual escape attempts as animal instinct rather than personal dislike, but it became a lot more complicated when he tried to pinpoint the reason a man would abandon his only son and never look back. Unfortunately, this problem looked like it was going to fall into the latter category.

The facts were thus: Jack loved Riley like a daughter; Riley had been in imminent, but not certain, danger; Mac had put himself between the two; Jack had chosen to disregard what Mac was saying in favour of physically moving him aside so he could reach Riley.

There was no logic in the world that could explain that away without demeaning Mac’s relationship with Jack in a way that was deeply hurtful.

It wasn’t a competition and even thinking of it in those terms left Mac swallowing down guilt and disgust at his own neediness. Jack cared loudly and widely; he was in possession of a heart so large, Mac was quite certain he could love a hundred people equally without breaking a sweat. It was no great stretch or challenge to accept that Jack was capable of loving both Riley and Mac, and that those two things had absolutely nothing to do with each other. There was nothing unreasonable about that.

So it wasn’t a competition, but if it had been then Mac had very definitely lost.

God, he needed to get it together. He was self-aware enough to realise that the only real path forward here was to forgive Jack the minor transgression and move on, accepting it for what it had been without trying to place any excess baggage onto it. If he really couldn’t manage that alone, Jack would no doubt be willing to offer the apology he’d tried to give earlier, should Mac reveal his concerns. Nothing anyone said or did would take back what had happened, and wishing otherwise was childish. He just needed to put it behind him.

Then again, that evidently wasn’t going to happen tonight.

He’d ended up out on the deck sometime around midnight, waiting sleeplessly in his bed until Bozer was well and truly unconscious before sneaking out, driven by a vague desire for air and a need to see the stars. He was only one for two on that – a heavy blanket of cloud had managed to erase the few bright night sparks that usually managed to make it past the light pollution – but that wasn’t such a bad score. At the very least, the still quiet made a nice contrasting balm to his inner turmoil.

The quiet didn’t last however – the hour hand on Mac’s watch had just started creeping past 4 when he heard the purr of a familiar engine pulling up outside and he breathed a long sigh. He had no idea what had drawn Jack there – he’d often joked about having a sixth sense when Mac was in trouble, but he couldn’t possibly have known about this – and he wasn’t entirely sure he wanted to find out. He toyed with the idea of slipping back into his bedroom before Jack had a chance to make it into the house, but he was sufficiently torn that he was still contemplating that course of action when he heard the door unlatch.

There were a few moments of quiet footsteps tracing through the house, first checking on the bedrooms and then, after presumably finding Mac’s empty, more hurried movement until the door to the deck squeaked open and Jack’s boots appeared in the corner of Mac’s vision. Exhausted and frankly too tired to even try to pretend otherwise, Mac didn’t look up.

“What are you doing here?” He asked quietly. His whole evening had felt fragile and a superstitious part of him he’d never been able to ditch warned that it was in danger of shattering if he didn’t speak softly.

“Couldn’t sleep,” was the equally gentle reply. “You?”

“It’s been a long few days.” The words sounded heavy, containing too much meaning. He took an unenthusiastic swig of beer to cover it. “There’s more in the fridge if you want one,” he added, shaking the bottle a little.

“Little early to start drinking, isn't it?”

“To be fair, it was late when I started.”

“…I think that might make it worse hoss.”

He snorted indelicately and took another pull. Now that he’d started drinking it, he found himself vaguely comforted by the familiar flavour. There wasn’t enough alcohol in it to do more than warm him, but the sensation wasn’t unwelcome.

Jack seemed to sigh, then his boots disappeared as he worked his way around behind Mac to sit beside him on the lip of the firepit. Now on the same level, Mac couldn’t avoid meeting his gaze. He looked as tired as Mac felt, so he said as much.

His Overwatch offered an unconvincing smile. “I’ll have you know that I look good no matter what,” he replied, but it was clear his heart wasn’t in it. “Truth be told, I feel like I’ve been kicked by a horse.”

That raised concern. “Are you getting ill? I think I’ve still got some of those antipyretics in the cupboard-”

He made a jerking motion to get to his feet, but Jack waved him back down before he could go anywhere. “Nah, it’s nothing man, don’t worry about it. It’s just like you said – been a long few days. Think I’m still working through it all.”

Mac felt his heart sink in his chest. Of all the conversations he didn’t want to have right that second. “I know how much you didn’t want Riley out there. I can’t imagine how stressful this has all been,” he said, aiming for compassionate and just barely hitting the mark. “I’m just glad it’s over.”

Jack, weirdly, looked sheepish. “You and me both kid, but that’s not exactly what I meant.”

There was a pause as Mac processed that and came up empty. “Oh?”

Despite the fact that whatever was going on in Jack’s head had been fierce enough to drive him all the way to Mac’s house in the middle of the night, he suddenly looked tremendously uncertain. One hand snaked up to rub at the back of his neck, dragging his head down so that he didn’t have to maintain eye contact. Mac half expected him to start shifting in his seat.

“Jack? What’s going on?”

He sighed gustily, apparently rooting around for his courage, and met Mac’s gaze again. “Look, I know you brushed it off before and I appreciate your understanding and all that but-” He hesitated ever so briefly, then the rest came pouring out of him like he couldn’t stop it. “Man, I was way out of line yesterday. Like so far past the line I couldn’t even see it any more. Yeah I was stressed about Riley and I ain’t ever going to be sorry for looking out for her, but that doesn’t change the fact that for a split second I was willing to go through you to do it. There’s nothing that could ever make that right and I need you to know how fucking sorry I am.”

He broke his gaze away again, bringing up his other hand to bury his face in his palms in pained desperation. Mac blinked at him in surprise, utterly stunned.

“And it’s stupid anyway because I know how much you care about Riley and me, and I know that you were trying to stop me to protect us both – I should have just seen-” He bit himself off, grumbled, pressed on more calmly: “I was so focused on my own inability to see what Riley could do that I lost sight of her, the mission, and you. It’s my job to keep you safe – that’s my only job – and I was so far out of my own head that I put you in danger because of my own stupidity. There is nothing about that that’s okay and even if you don’t need me to say it, I had to tell you that I’m sorry. I’m not expecting forgiveness because shit, I really messed it up this time, but for whatever it’s worth, I swear I’ll never do that again.”

Mac forced himself to swallow, desperately willing his exhausted brain to kick itself into gear and process everything Jack had just dumped on him. When he’d considered asking for an apology after all, this hadn’t been quite what he had in mind. In response to it, all he could manage was a sort of stunned silence.

Jack rubbed at his face one last time, then pulled himself upright again and forcefully met Mac’s eyes. He looked as though he was bracing for a hit, but he didn’t flinch. Mac, for his part, had absolutely no idea what he was possibly supposed to say.

A part of him desperately wanted to grasp the lifeline he was being offered, accept the explanation as the reassurance it was evidently meant to be, but he just couldn’t bring himself to do it. After a lifetime of those he cared about proving that Mac was a very easy person to leave, some self-preservation instinct was finally picking up its head and warning him not to trust so blindly. A few days ago he had been utterly certain that Jack would never willingly hurt him – now, he knew what it was to hear his Overwatch’s voice dip low and threatening, warning him that if he didn’t step aside, he was going to get hurt. He knew what it was to go cold at the humiliation he’d felt when faced with a thoroughly dismissive, ‘Boy, get out of my face.’ He knew what it was to have Jack look at him and see nothing but an obstacle in his way.

Hours too late and in the worst possible moment, Mac suddenly realised that the anger he’d been quietly cultivating wasn’t really anger at all.

As he always seemingly managed to do, Jack chose that same moment to pick up on the fact that something had gone wrong with his partner, because his earnestness immediately dropped away behind guilty concern. He hesitated for several heartbeats, absorbing whatever was going on in Mac’s expression, then tilted his head consideringly. “When you stopped me apologising earlier,” he said very slowly, “You didn’t mean it when you said it was fine, did you?”

Mac forced himself to shrug, trying to shake looseness into limbs that had frozen in place. “Like I said, Riley’s lucky to have you. You were just watching out for her.”

“Yeah, and throwing you under the bus in the process. God, I almost- I could have hurt you Mac.”

Now was probably a very bad time to reveal that he had hurt him. At least the bruises were in places easy to hide.

“You didn’t,” he lied instead, running his eyes over the skyline rather than let Jack see the mistruth in them. “I appreciate the apology, I really do, but I understand. Riley’s family, Jack, of course you’re going to do everything you can to defend her.”

Jack let out a humourless snort. “You say that like you’re not every bit as much my family as she is.”

There was a sudden, telling silence. Jack blinked. Mac’s gaze stayed fixed on the horizon.

“You- You do know that… right?” Jack said haltingly, his voice so quiet as to be almost unheard even in the silence. When there was no immediate response, it turned more forceful. “Mac, tell me you know that.”

He swallowed hard. In the face of such honest concern, Mac couldn’t bring himself to lie or to brush it off, but at the same time he had no idea how to explain the tangle of thorns in his head without sounding as stupid as he was afraid he was being.

“Jack,” he started carefully, weighing up the words as he went, “We’ve been partners for years now. I know how important that is and I’m grateful for it every day, but… But you knew Riley when she was just a kid.” He twitched his hands in a vague attempt at encompassing the sheer scale of their relationship. “I get that things have been kind of weird between the two of you, but that doesn’t change the fact that she’s basically your daughter. I should never have tried to get in the middle of that.”

“If you hadn’t gotten in the middle of it, I would have gotten her killed,” Jack shot back immediately. “You did everything right Mac. I’m the one who fucked up here.”

There wasn’t a lot Mac could really say to that since it was technically accurate, but he was spared the effort by Jack refusing to take the bait of his deflection.

“And besides,” he continued firmly, “That’s not even slightly the point here. You- You really don’t think that I see you as family?”

Goddamn it he sounded hurt and that was so not what Mac had been going for. He sucked in a breath and cursed himself when it shook. “That’s not- That wasn’t what I was trying to say,” he managed lamely, wanting to reassure but deeply unwilling to make any presumptions. That was precisely what had gotten him into this mess.

Jack’s eyes were dark and sad and knowing. Mac could scarcely stand to look at them. “Maybe not, but it’s what you’re thinking, right? You’ve got it in your head that everything that happened was because Riley’s more important to me than you?”

Hearing the words said aloud in such a level, careful tone sent a rush of blazing shame right through him. It sounded so pathetic when put so simply. This time the anger that burned hot on its heels was genuine, though aimed more at himself than anyone else. He shook his head sharply as though to rid himself of the feeling but he still couldn’t quite meet Jack’s eyes when he said, “No. I know it doesn’t work like that. I’m not some kid in need of coddling Jack. I’m just tired, that’s all.”

“You’re tired because you’re sitting on your deck at four in the morning instead of sleeping, and I’ve known you long enough to know that happens when you can’t get something out of your head. So, if I’m wrong, what is it? Because it has been a shitty few days but somehow I get the feeling this isn’t about a missing EMP or you having to figure us a way out of a crashing plane with no chutes.” His expression was complicated; some combination of worried and open, like he was pleading with Mac to just speak with him. “C’mon Mac. Talk to me. I can’t help if I don’t know what’s going on.”

Mac shook his head slowly, too many thoughts crowding in at once to make sense of anything. “Jack-”

“Don’t tell me it’s nothing. Mac-” Jack bit off whatever he was about to say in frustration, shaking himself. “God I really fucked up. Should’ve known you’d come to the worst possible conclusion. Never did know your own worth.” He ran a tired hand over his face, then drew himself upright and faced Mac head on, a rare seriousness shining in his eyes. “Okay, this is something I clearly should be saying more often since you still don’t seem to believe it but, you’re my brother Mac. You’re every bit as much my family as Ri is and I know that I made you doubt that, but it never for one second stopped being true. You hear me? I’m so sorry for what I did outside that warehouse – you didn’t deserve it one bit and I should never have done it. But it didn’t mean what you’re thinking it did.”

“I’m not thinking anything Jack,” he said quietly, even while his brain raced away from him. He wanted so, so badly to believe what he was hearing and Jack had sworn long ago to always be honest with him. To Mac’s knowledge he’d never once broken that promise…

But it was also exactly what Mac wanted to hear. Of course he was going to be inclined to believe it.

“That’s never once been true and you know it,” Jack shot back, not losing an ounce of his seriousness.

Mac didn’t rise to the implied joke. A sudden swell of frustration at Jack’s presumption climbed his throat and he was scoffing before he could help himself. “Tell me then,” he said sharply. “What exactly is it I’m thinking?”

Jack flinched lightly at the acid in his tone, but he held Mac’s gaze steadily like he was prepared to take any blow he threw his way. “I’ve never tried to pretend I can follow everything that goes through your head hoss. I don’t have near the IQ for that. But I think even you’d agree that I’ve gotten pretty good at following you.”

Mac’s face tried to twitch into a scowl but he forced it down with a will of iron.

His partner continued without interruption. “Now maybe I’m overstepping here, but I’m gonna bet that right now you’re feeling angry and hurt because you trusted me and I let you down. I let you down real bad.” There, he did hesitate very slightly, before deciding to voice what they both already knew. “I know I’m not the first person to do that, not by a long shot. You’ve had to deal with all kinds of shit you never deserved, but betrayal isn’t something anyone gets used to.”

Burgeoning anger aside, that felt like a step too far. Mac shook his head sharply. “You didn’t betray anyone-”

“Yes, I did,” he cut in firmly. “I betrayed your trust. I promised to protect you, but I got so caught up in my own bullshit hang-ups that I broke that promise. You’ve got every reason to be pissed as all hell about that Mac, don’t let anyone tell you you don’t.”

“You were just trying to help Riley,” Mac said again, sounding weak to his own ears. Everything Jack was saying was everything he’d thought he’d needed to hear, but now that it was all laid out so plainly before him, the only sensation he could summon was bittersweet resignation. Jack wasn’t wrong - he felt betrayed.

“Yeah, maybe. That’s not an excuse.”

There was a long, still pause. “No,” he finally admitted quietly. “It isn’t.”

The corners of Jack’s eyes were damp when he nodded, accepting and agreeing with that in equal measure. He looked crushed. “And you deserve every apology I can give you for that. Hell, I wouldn’t be surprised if you wanted to take a swing at me.”

Mac shot him a dark look, irritated by the joke, but he found only seriousness in Jack’s face; he’d meant it. “I’m not going to hit you,” he said, offended at the implication.

“I know you won’t,” Jack soothed carefully. “I’m just trying to say - very badly - that I do know how badly I’ve fucked this up. I broke a promise to you that I swore my life on and you know I don’t take that sort of thing lightly. I can’t ever explain how sorry I am for it, but I can spend every moment you let me trying to make up for it.”

They let that sit between them for a long few minutes. Mac felt torn; even with the anger and hurt and fucking devastation rocking around in his chest he could admit that Jack was saying everything right. The real question then was whether or not Mac could trust it when Jack had already blindsided him once.

His Overwatch’s smile was bleak and pained. “I can see that brain of yours whirring away,” he said at length. “Trying to work out if I’m telling the truth, huh?”

As he said it, his façade crumbled ever so slightly and for just a moment, he looked deeply, unbearably sad. Like he knew he’d earned every inch of that mistrust and was regretting it with every fibre of his being. In all their time together, Mac had seen Jack wear that expression exactly once: a thousand years ago in an Italian hospital room as he told a barely conscious Mac that Nikki hadn’t made it. The context might have been different, but those eyes- their grief was the same.

That- that Mac could believe. No one who looked like Jack did in that moment could be insincere. Jack was a hell of a good liar when he needed to be – requirement of the job, really – but the raw, honest heartbreak in that expression was not something even he could fake. For the first time since Jack walked towards him with violence in his eyes, Mac found that he could trust this, if nothing else.

No matter what had happened between them, how readily Jack had been willing to throw away every promise he’d ever made to Mac, he could see the evidence of his regret right in front of him. It didn’t undo what he’d done, not by a long shot, but it was… something.

Something important.

Maybe something so important it was really the only thing that actually mattered.

There was no amount of words that could entirely mend the hurt that Jack had wrought that day, but perhaps they were enough to start the process. Jack was right here, swearing to do better, and despite a lifetime of reasons not to trust an offer like that, Mac couldn’t help but hear the ring of truth. For now, perhaps that had to be enough. Healing always came with time and with Jack willing to make amends, Mac had a feeling that they’d get there together in the end.

He sucked in a hard breath, and finally, finally forced himself to let his anger and hurt go. They would do nothing for him now.

“I believe you,” he said, and meant it. He caught Jack’s eye. “And I accept your apology. My own messed up head aside, I do know that you were only trying to protect Riley.”

“Hey now, your head’s doing just fine. I’m the one tying it up in knots, even when I should know better. You’ve been given plenty of reason to think the worst of people in your life Mac. That it’s not your first response is- well. Incredible, I guess. I don’t blame you a bit for not trusting me after… Everything.”

Mac’s eyes dropped to the floor again, feeling oddly self-conscious about how easily Jack was able to see through him. It was always easy to forget how little time they had really known each other when Jack could look at him and immediately see the heart of whatever was bothering him. Bozer might have known him for longer, but Jack had still been the one who got to see the darker sides of him born in desert heat and sandy plains. That was exactly why this whole mess had hurt as much as it had.

“I always trust you Jack,” he said honestly. “You caught me off guard, but nothing is about to change that.”

Jack blinked hard, swallowing as he processed that. “After everything that happened this week, I know that I don’t deserve that but you don’t know how good that is to hear, man.” He rubbed at his face, pulling his emotions back in line. “And just so you know, while I appreciate you accepting my apology and all, I know I’m nowhere near done earning your forgiveness. What I did was-”

His eyes suddenly turned distant, and whatever strength had bled back into his frame drained in a rush. He looked… fragile.

“Jack, you don’t need to earn anything,” Mac said, suddenly feeling vaguely guilty for taking it all so badly while at the same time desperately trying to throttle that sensation. He wanted to forgive Jack – already had, if he was honest with himself – but that didn’t mean he hadn’t been right to be upset in the first place. “I’m glad you apologised, no matter what I told you before. That’s all I needed.” He shrugged self-deprecatingly. “Well, that and for you to talk some sense into me, maybe.”

“That’s my job, remember?” Jack said with a shrug of his own. “Keeping your head on straight is half the battle.” He winced in the same instant as he said it, apparently realising the irony in him being the one to throw Mac off this time. He visibly forced himself to straighten out, trying to accept the truth of Mac’s forgiveness. “Well, lesson learned, I guess. Just wish I didn’t do it by hurting you.”

Mac snorted softly, even though his heart wasn’t really it in. “I’m tougher than I look.”

“That is one hundred percent true,” Jack agreed without hesitation, “But it doesn’t change the fact that I was a dick and you caught the worst of it. Which would be bad enough at the best of times, but in this case you were only doing what you could to protect me and Riley, which is like, I don’t know, a double dick move on my part?” He broke off momentarily with a frown as if trying to work out the maths of that specific scenario, then shook himself like a dog shaking off water. “Whatever, the point is-” A pause. “What was my point again?”

Despite himself, Mac snickered. “I think it was something along the lines of ‘I’m sorry I was an ass, I won’t do it again’. That about sum it up?”

Jack grinned in that knowing way he did when he’d succeeded in pulling Mac out of his own head without him realising. “Couldn’t have put it better myself.” He sobered, catching Mac’s gaze. “And I mean it. I’m not ever going to take a swing at you man, and I’m going to do everything in my power to make sure you never have to feel like I might again.”

Mac’s first instinct was to brush the reassurance off once more, remind Jack that he already had his trust, but he caught himself before he could. He was determined not to punish himself for reacting badly to something he had every reason to react badly to, and besides, it seemed like Jack needed to say it just as much as Mac needed to hear it. After everything that had happened that day, it felt good to hear that promise put into words. “Thank you,” he said at length, letting truth settle into his tone.

He went to say more, but the words were lost as a jaw-cracking yawn forced its way up his throat. Jack chuckled quietly at him.

“Yeah, I feel that,” he said, dispensing with his heavy tone for something lighter, something healing. “Think it might be past time we got you to bed, man. You look knackered.”

“I am,” he admitted. There was very little point pretending otherwise; he knew what he looked like. “You’ve got to be exhausted too.”

Jack shrugged easily. “Yeah, but I’ll get out of your hair. I knew you weren’t exactly expecting visitors when I decided to turn up unannounced at four in the morning.”

“That’s literally never stopped you,” he said, rolling his eyes. Truthfully, he was glad Jack had shown up when he did - it was only thanks to it that he thought he might actually be able to get some honest to god sleep before he had to show up at work tomorrow- or, well, later today. “You’re not driving home this late. Just sleep here.”

“I didn’t exactly bring a go-bag with me.”

“Unless you’ve changed dramatically in size in the last two months, I’m pretty sure the clothes you left in my dresser are still going to fit you.”

Jack looked like he was bending, wanting to give in to the comfort readily being offered, but something dark and wary in his eyes was holding him back. That line of guilt that ran rigid along the back of his shoulders had eased slightly during the course of their conversation, but it still lingered on even now. Mac had a sneaking suspicion he wasn’t going to lose it for a long time.

“I don’t want to impose,” he said after a strained moment of silence. His gaze dropped to his lap. “I think I’ve disturbed your sleep enough tonight to last a lifetime, bud.”

“In case it wasn’t abundantly obvious, you weren’t disturbing anything.”

“Just ‘cause I wasn’t here, doesn’t mean it wasn’t my fault.”

Mac couldn’t help but roll his eyes again. “C’mon man, it’s done. We’re all good, remember? But if you keep arguing about driving home at four AM when you look like you’re going to fall asleep at the wheel, then you are going to keep me up when I would much rather be sleeping. Matty’s already going to be mad as it is; we don’t need to pile sleep deprivation on top.”

His Overwatched hissed, pulling on a peeved frown. “You’re too sneaky for your own good, you know that?”

Mac released what felt like his first genuine laugh in days and drained the rest of his beer, easing himself carefully to his feet. “Someone might have mentioned it in the past. Come on, big guy. I’m not carrying you inside if you pass out here.”

“You could just wake me up.”

“And give up the opportunity to listen to you griping about that bad back you pretend you don’t have? Ooh, that’s a tough call.”

“You’re an ass.”

Mac’s laugh chased them into the darkened house.

#macgyver #macgyver fanfiction #fanfic #my fanfic #fanfiction #angus macgyver #jack dalton #s02e02 muscle car + paperclip #muscle car + paperclip

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