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maxwell-grant · 3 years

Note

Red of Overly Sarcastic Productions once said :"If you can imagine your Batman comforting a shared child, then congratulations, you're righting Batman. If not, you're just writing the Punisher in a funny hat". This got me wondering: could the Shadow comfort a scared child?

Could he? You forget who was there to lift young Bruce to his feet at his first brush with death (sadly far from his last).

But it's an interesting question to pose still, because children were straight up not in the pulps, not in any I've read, and I can't recall any episodes of the radio show that feature them much (there's gotta be at least a few, because they had everything in that show). The most interaction I think The Shadow's ever had with children (from comics that I can discuss here, because Marshall Rogers' "Harold Goes to Washington" is way, way too much for me to go into right now, and the less I talk about some other DC comics, the better) is in the Street & Smith comics.

There's Jerry from the Devil Kyoti arc, a kid who was traumatized by an encounter with the villain who Sayre's looking after and who ends up having some kind of hidden power that allows him to see The Shadow and defeat the villain. There was a blonde Jerry who showed up later in the Monstradamus arc, but he isn't a kid so much as he's diet Jimmy Olsen or a replacement for Harry, but he had weird eyesight-based powers and a familiarity with The Shadow, so I assume it's the same character.

There was also Donald Jordan - Shadow Jr, and okay, I may have to talk more about this weird little failed experiment some other time, but the basic gist of it is that The Shadow had a friend in Tibet named Harry Jordan (and someday I'm also gonna write about the weird prevalence and significance of the name "Harry" in The Shadow's mythos in and out of universe) who was murdered, leaving his son orphaned and with nowhere to go. And, I'll admit that I have a real weakness for The Shadow calling people "son", which he does a lot in this story.

And as you can expect, it then turns out that the kid's also learned how to cloud minds and has basically the same powers The Shadow has in these comics, and they solve the mystery of his dad's murder together, and yeah, you can absolutely tell that they are setting up this kid to be The Shadow's Robin. Although, interestingly, they don't have The Shadow actually recruit the kid, instead it's Jordan who asks The Shadow if he can go with him and join his mission, and Cranston even states he's going to have to "earn" his way

"Must I stay here, sir? It will always remind me of dad - I'd like to devote my life to your fight against evil and evil doers!

Now, "Shadow Jr's" career was incredibly short-lived, it only lasted for about two other issues, and I have no idea what happened in his final appearence called "Snake Eyes" in Shadow Comics #77, I cannot find that issue anywhere and I really want to. But the one other solo story of his I've read was...well, I think it kinda illustrates why the idea of The Shadow having a Robin was doomed from the start.

...Yeah. Even The Shadow at his most sanitized and family friendly is still The Shadow, and there's no room for children in his network, obviously he shouldn't and wouldn't have children be in those positions or make decisions expected from grown-ups who have already had encounters with death and danger, why would anyone do that-

The only instance I can think of The Shadow interacting with a child in the pulps was during The Prince of Evil, when he has to rescue a young boy from Stark's thugs.

Cranston, dazed, tried to stagger to his feet. Before he could do so, the thug had picked up the limp figure of the boy and was darting out into the street. There was a scream of horror from pedestrians.

A heavy truck was racing at top speed along the avenue. Straight into the path of the truck, the thug threw the senseless boy!

The driver of the truck jammed on the brakes. But it was too late to halt the heavy vehicle. The broad-tired wheels rolled toward the limp head of the lad on the pavement.

An instant before it could crush out his life, Lamont Cranston dived headlong into the path of destruction. His shoulder struck the boy, rolling him toward the curb. A quick wriggle, and Cranston swerved aside from the grinding death that loomed over him.

He picked up the boy. One glance and he knew there was no time to lose. The attempted killer had leaped into a waiting sedan and had already made his escape.

The boy was all Cranston could see or think about. Brass knuckles had fractured his skull. He had suffered a concussion of the brain. A glance at his bluish lips and the fixed glaze of his staring eyes told Cranston that unless the boy was operated on immediately, he would die.

A leap, Cranston was in his car. He laid the boy gently on the seat beside him, then headed the car toward the nearest hospital. Traffic lights were ignored.

The boy was taken to an emergency operating room and a skilled surgeon went to work. When it was over, Cranston asked only one question: "Will the child live?"

"Hard to say. We'll do our best."

"Spare no expense. Put him in a private room. Engage day and night nurses."

Cranston's face was pale. He knew that he himself was indirectly responsible for the boy's attack. A supercriminal had made a prompt answer to Cranston's message over Jackson's telephone. That telephone must have been tapped. The attempt to kill the boy was a vicious warning for Lamont Cranston to mind his own business about the Harmon family. It was a follow-up of the attack on Jackson's dog.

Cranston felt a surge of hot anger. He kept it under control while he answered routine police questions. He told all he knew - which was nothing.

He had only one angry thought. He intended to drive straight to the office of David Chester. He'd get the truth out of the sleek Chester, if he had to batter him with vengeful fists!

Cranston was actually halfway to Chester's office before common sense returned to him. He realized he had lost his sense of balance. He was behaving exactly as the crooks wanted. He was playing their game, not his!

He parked, and the hot rage drained slowly from him. He stopped thinking about the limp figure of a young lad on a white operating table.

This is definitely because Tinsley writes the character differently than Gibson, but I actually cannot think of another occasion where we got to read about The Shadow actively wanting to hit someone with his fists. It's very, very rare to read about The Shadow actually getting mad in the first place in such an undignified way. And I think with this passage, you'll start to notice a pattern.

The problem isn't that The Shadow cannot interact with kids or that he can't comfort them, he does it to his agents and adults he wants to help just fine, he knows how to address people in their language, or any language. The problem is, The Shadow is constantly surrounded by danger everywhere he goes, because he is The Shadow. He can be any number of things at any number of occasions, but usually, when The Shadow shows up, it's usually because people are going to die, and people are going to kill, and it's his job to address that and work the scales.

Children should not be anywhere near this, and if The Shadow's interacting with a child, it usually means that some grave danger or tragedy fell upon them, and he's here to either prevent greater tragedy or address the fall-out, and he'd be the first to agree that neither of these options should be happening at all. It doesn't mean he's not gonna do what's right and give life and limb to protect them, but, it shouldn't be up to the Boogeyman to look after them in the first place. Maybe it shouldn't be up to the Boogeyman to protect us.

But then again, as I mentioned when I talked about my own reasons for liking The Shadow so much, there are many kids who would like nothing more than to have the Boogeyman by their side to protect them. There's comfort in knowing that the scariest man in the room is unconditionally there to protect you, and that is the comfort that The Shadow gives best. Not as Cranston, not under a friendly face, but as what he is.

Due to a lack of scenes from the pulps or satisfying scenes from elsewhere, I will instead be pulling one from a fan story written by Kimberly-Murphy Smith, editor and writer of The Hot Cornerm where The Shadow rescues a child who was kidnapped for blackmail. I couldn't care less that it's fanfic, and if you do, come back in 20 or so years after The Shadow's been made public domain and it's gonna be just as official as anything licensed (on my “to write about” list: how fickle the separation between “official” and “fanfic” is, and the many times it plainly didn’t exist). There’s aspects of her writing I don’t care for, but I really like this scene and I do think The Shadow’s more gentle interactions with people are necessary to getting the character.

Annabelle.

She stopped crying for a minute. "Who's there?" she said, her voice choked.

A friend. Your mommy and daddy sent me to pick you up.

"Mommy? Mommy's here?"

Sh-h-h. Annabelle felt a gloved hand gently stroking her hair. She's waiting for you at home. So, we need to hurry up and leave.

"'kay." She looked around. "Where are you?"

It's kind of hard to see me. It's dark in here, plus you've been crying so much your eyes probably hurt.

"Yeah."

Don't be afraid. I'm here to help.

"'kay."

The implicit trust of children was simply amazing at times. Adults trembled in fear of The Shadow's wrath, but children somehow seemed to understand that he was there to help them, even if they couldn't see him.

Sit up, Annabelle. I'm going to pick you up. Be very quiet.

One hand took each of her arms and guided them around a neck she could not see. "Why are you wearin' a blanket?" she asked as the fabric of his cloak brushed against her shoulders.

Sometimes I get cold at night.

"Even in the summer?"

Even in the summer. He gently stroked her cheek and wiped away her tears. Now, you need to be very quiet so those bad men in the next room don't hear us. I'll bet you're tired.

She nodded.

He rocked her on his arms, projecting a very gentle hypnotic relaxation into her with his powers as he did. You probably didn't get your nap, either. Poor thing. Lean on my shoulder and go to sleep. And when you wake up, you'll be back with Mommy and Daddy.

She yawned, then snuggled against his shoulder and went to sleep.

The Shadow sighed with relief. Now to get past the men out front. He gently pulled the pistol out of its holster under his left arm and slipped it into the belted waist of his overcoat within easy reach, then secured his grip on Annabelle and draped his cloak over her.

She clutched the edge of his cloak in her hand like a security blanket and snuggled against his shoulder again.

(Art by Jill Thompson)

#replies tag #the shadow #pulp heroes #fanfic #I think about the -Sometimes I get cold at night- response a lot #and how superhero capes can easily be likened to oversized blankets #and The Shadow is one of the main reasons why capes became so popular among American heroes #seriously you can see how practically overnight so many heroes at the time imitating The Shadow acquired capes #and what is a hero if not a childhood fantasy manifest #they are all just wearing blankets to battle #I think my posts are turning into too much of rollercoasters

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weirdthinkingdragon · 3 years

Text

Welcome To The Family (1/???)

Yandere EraserMic household x reader

Finally decided to start writing it! I’ve never babysat in my life, so if this is incredibly wrong I’m sorry. No warnings for now. No idea how many chapters this is going to be right now, but for sure at least 3-5.

I’m on my way to babysit two new children. Well, a child and later in the day a teenager when they get back from school. It’s beyond astonishing somehow being the one selected to babysit two children of heroes. They’re adopted, but that makes it all the more strange. I can’t complain much though. They’re paying a rather large amount and asked me to keep quiet about it. I have to go there early in the morning and be there most of the day. They also warned me some days I may have to babysit them longer than others. They did also warn me a few of their students may come by to hang out with Eri for a bit.

My fist knocks on the door four times. Yamada- hopefully, I remembered who is who correctly- opens it. He lets me in with a giant and welcoming smile on his face. In the living room were the other three. Eri, and the other which must be Shinsou, look at me cautiously. Eri hides a bit behind the black-haired adult while Shinsou seems rather watchful and wary of me. I crouch down to her level but stay a bit away to introduce myself. “You must be Eri. I’ve heard a lot about you. My name’s Y/N. I hope to get along with you.” This is true, I’ve been informed by the two about what she has been through.

The black-haired man confirms with a small nod down to her as she looks up at him. Whatever that was supposed to be about, it helped make her take a step away from him and look at me more.

Aizawa- hopefully, I’m still correct- looks at the clock. “We need to go now.” the blond nods and leaves for their rather expensive-looking black car. Aizawa leaves as well. Shinsou glares at me one last time before he starts to head towards the door as well. “Don’t do anything you will regret.” He threatens and leaves too.

Eri sits on the couch still timidly staring at me. To say it felt awkward between us is an understatement. “So, Eri, would you like to show me your favorite toys? Or maybe there’s a show you really like we could watch for a while?” Like a lightswitch, her eyes light up like she was just told she could have all the candy in the world. She then takes off up the stairs for presumably her bedroom. I wait in the living room for her return. I take a moment to examine the living room better. There are hardly any pictures on the walls. There’s only one with the four of them and a bunch of teens. Must be his class. They look like a chaotic and lively bunch. The light gray couch is in the middle of the living room with a large flat screen T.V. in front of it. To the left of the couch and a little behind is a matching gray loveseat with a giant cat tree between it and the wall. Huh, so they have a cat or possibly two. Surprised they’re not in the living room. The black stand under the T.V. matches the coffee table in front of it. There’s a door straight from the main entrance I entered from. My guess is either a bathroom or the kitchen. Next to it is a flight of stairs that Eri went up. That must lead to the bedrooms. There’s another door next to the stairs. A closet maybe? Or maybe another bedroom.

Eri comes down a few minutes later with five stuffed animals in her arms. A green rabbit with matching green eyes, a brown teddy bear with beady eyes, a blue galaxy patterned fox with turquoise eyes, a yellow dog with blue eyes, and a cute tiny light gray unicorn with glittery pink eyes. It looks like her and seems like her favorite with how it seems a little worn. They’re all so adorable that I think my heart might have melted.

“Aw, what are their names?” She proudly holds them up and says their names. The one that got me was “Deku”. Doesn’t that mean useless? How would a child know that term? More importantly, how are the adults allowing her to name it that?

“Deku? Why is it named that?”

“He saved me. I wanted a stuffed animal like him!” She cheerfully says. I’m not going to question why they chose that name.

“They sound like amazing people! I can’t wait to meet them someday!” She smiles at me. It quickly becomes sad instead. “But I won’t be going to the school with them anymore…”

I try to think of how to make her feel better. Those two must be the ones her fathers warned me will come over at some point. “Well, maybe I could ask your parents if they can come over someday after school.” She enthusiastically nods.

It grows quiet between us again as she holds her stuffed animals.

I look back at the cat tree. “I see you have a cat tree. Do you know where the cat is?”

“We have three!” she cheerfully informs.

“Three? Wow! I bet they keep you safe, huh?” I question. She shrugs. “Mochi is too big to even jump on the bed.”

“Mochi? Cute name!”

“Mrow” came a sudden voice from the cat tree. There’s a box part on the floor I somehow missed earlier. A rather fat cat saunters out of it. “Mochi!” Eri cheerfully yells and goes over to it. It’s an orange tabby. She tries to pick him up and miraculously succeeds. It’s so comical I can’t help but laugh. A child carrying a cat that’s almost as big as her. She waddles over with it and places them on the couch between us. They just yawn, stretch, and lie down right where they were plopped. They roll over to show their belly. I rub the belly of it. How could I not? Once again, it doesn’t seem to care in the slightest.

“What are the names of the other two?” I ask.

“Sundae and Oreo! They’re brothers!”

“Are they as big as Mochi?” She shakes her head. “No. My dads went to buy things that feed the cats when we are not home.”

“That’s good! Maybe later we could try finding the other two and have a tea party or something.” She looked like she was nearly screaming in excitement at the news. “Only one of my dads likes to do tea parties with me.”

I smile. “Well, now you have two that do!”

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Many hours later, she decided she wanted to do the tea party. We were able to find the other two cats which were sleeping on her dads’ bed. Eri told me they were in there since I didn’t go in there out of respect. Unfortunately, I didn’t bring a dress or suit to change into for her. I’ll have to remember that for next week so I can do it when not babysitting.

Oreo and Sundae were rather difficult to settle down into chairs around the table. They’re tuxedos and an easy way to tell which is who is apparently the white eyebrows on Oreo that makes him look always angry. We just gave up when they decided to sit on the table instead of the chairs.

The tea set is a pastel green with interesting shiny gold lines decorating it. It’s a great contrast to the small dark red table it’s on in her room. She has tons of drawings with her, Shinsou, and the two adults covering her walls. There’s also a few with a green-haired and blond with her. There is nothing in the teacups as she passes one to me. “Why, thank you, Eri!” She smiles and nods. That smile needs to be protected.

It’s hard to think someone could do something so evil to such an innocent bean. I’m beyond glad she’s in a much better home now. I’ve only known her for like half a day, but if something were to happen to her, I’d kill everyone around me and then myself. She looks behind me and lights up more. “Toshi!”

I turn around to see Shinsou leaning in the doorway with his arms crossed and a glare aimed at me. How long has he been there? Man, he’s incredibly quiet. I understand why he doesn’t trust me yet. I’m still a stranger after all. It would be more concerning if he did trust me immediately. I give him an inviting smile. “Welcome, Shinsou! Why don’t you come to our tea party instead of standing there? I’m sure Eri would be more than happy to have her brother join!”

“Yes! C’mon Toshi, please?” She begs. He shakes his head. “You two go ahead. I’d rather watch for now.” He says, hardening his glare at me. Eri doesn’t seem to notice his glare and goes back to her chair. How cute though, a protective brother! She deserves nothing less.

After that, she wanted to show me her favorite show. Shinsou sits rather close to her between us. Seems a bit excessive, but whatever makes him comfortable I guess. Checking the clock above the T.V., it was almost time for me to go.

Shinsou goes to the bathroom, but something tells me he’s testing me. I mean, I didn't do anything before he came home, and wouldn’t Eri have already run to him if I did do something? Well, with the villains around you can’t be so sure.

Eri swings her feet while sitting farther up on the couch. “Are you going to come back tomorrow?”

“Of course! We still have so many things we have to do together!” I reach over and go to rub her head. She flinches so I take my hand away and think for a moment. How can I get her to trust me without any problems occurring? “Hey, Eri?” She looks at me again with trust, yet a hint of unease still in her eyes. Please don’t tell me I just royally screwed up. “How about this. I do to myself what I’m going to do to you, and you can allow it or not. Like this.” I say, and gently rub the top of my head. I bring my hand halfway to her and wait for her reply.

It takes a moment, but she gives me a small nod. I rub her head, making her give a big smile to me.

At that moment, the door opened to reveal the two men. They were tense as we locked eyes, but that went away when they noticed Eri was smiling at me.

“Welcome back you guys! Eri and I had so much fun today. She even brought me to her tea party! Your cats gave us quite a bit of trouble to involve them though.” I inform as Eri goes to hug Yamada and then Aizawa right after.

Shinsou comes into the room as well. Like a silent conversation, he gives a curt nod to Aizawa, which he returns.

Yamada smirks at me. “But what’s important is… Did ya succeed?”

I shrug. “Kind of. We got them to stay on the table instead of the chair.” He snickers. “That’s those devious two!” He looks down at Eri. “Ya must have had a lotta fun, huh? Sad to miss the party!”

I decide to leave so they get more time as a family before they have to go to bed. I don’t need to interfere with that. I wave to her as I go to the door and put on my shoes. “See you tomorrow, Eri!” She waves back, shocking the two adults. Wonder why they’re shocked about that. Maybe she doesn’t usually trust new people as fast? Well, I’ve always been pretty good with children.

I wave at the three men as well and leave excited for what tomorrow might bring.

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I have rather big plans for this story. Hopefully I keep up with it, and I promise it will get better later on.

#EraserMic household #yandere present mic #yandere eraserhead #yandere shouta aizawa #yandere hizashi yamada #yandere shinso hitoshi #yandere x reader #yandere mha x reader #welcome to the family

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moonlit-imagines · 4 years

Text

Headcanons for being Jane Foster’s child

Jane Foster x child!reader

Thor Odinson x Foster!child!reader

warnings:

a/n: no not a foster child, jane foster’s child 😌 also im so super glad you liked those!!! hope these are just as good!!! and im genuinely so sorry these took so long

prompt: anonymous: “Hey! I just read the Tony Stark x Potts!child!reader HC and I loved it! Would you do the same but with Thor and Jane? ❤️”

no babysitter = go to work with mom

dr. selvig gave you a rubik’s cube to keep you entertained

“fuck that! here, y/n, you can play my DS” -darcy

“can you not swear in front of my child?” -jane

you thought tonight would be boring, but then your mom and darcy collectively hit a homeless guy with a car!

“holy crap, we’re all going to jail!” -you

“don’t say ‘crap,’ y/n! we need to get him to a hospital!” -jane

ngl this dude was kinda funky

darcy used her taser and your mom covered your eyes, but you still peaked ;)

ride to the hospital

“don’t touch him, y/n”

“sorry, doc”

and the very next day you guys stole him 💕

“mr. thor, where are you from?”

“i am from asgard! it is much different from this realm, but your’s is adequate, i suppose”

“thanks?”

you could see the way your mom looked at him, though

he ate all the pop tarts >:(

she gave thor her ex boyfriends clothes

“yeah, donald was a real ass—” -you

“don’t say ‘ass.’ darcy curses too much” -jane

“sorry, mom...anyways, donald forgot to pick me up from soccer practice like, a dozen times. he sucked” -you

“this ‘donald’ doesn’t seem like a very good man...also, what is ‘soccer?’” -thor

you grabbed a soccer ball and tried to show him how to play but there was some other stuff the *scientists* had to take care of

you were a regular at izzy’s diner (well, mom was) and they always made you cute pancakes in different shapes!!

“ah, it’s a smiley face! that’s adorable!” -thor

“yeah! they like to surprise me whenever i come in. they’re pretty awesome” -you

*your mom literally beaming at how good thor is with you already*

you and thor were drawing on paper placemats

and then he broke a glass and you started giggling hdhshshs

but he had to leave

“no, thor, please don’t go!”

“i hope to meet you again one day, little one. hopefully fate sees it through”

:((((

no time to be sad bc ur mom’s lab got hijacked by the government

“hey, no fair! that’s my diary!” -you

“sorry, kid. there are constellation drawings we have to observe” -coulson

“aw, you draw constellations? wait, not now. you can’t just take all our stuff. especially that! that belongs to a child!” -jane

“sic ‘em, y/n!” -darcy

“don’t listen to darcy, y/n” -selvig

chilling in the trailer and missing thor bc he was the most interesting thing to happen to you and your mom in a while

and you wanted her to be happy even tho he was kind of crazy

“hey, mom? do you want to watch the stars tonight like we used to do? we could make s’mores?”

“that sounds like a great idea, baby! i’ve gotta go take care of some science stuff, so i’ll pick up some s’mores stuff while i’m out. love you!”

yeah she went to go see thor and he kinda got arrested but your mom came back home so you could watch the stars!

“so, do you like thor?” -you

“what? what makes you say that?” -jane

“it’s cool if you do, i think he’s awesome. a little weird, but at least he’s nice”

then thor and selvig came home and selvig was drunk as a skunk

*poking him while he giggles and tells you about thor*

“i wish your grandfather could have met that guy! he would have loved him...i wish you met your grandfather, too” -selvig

thor inviting you back outside

“i’d like you to teach me more about this ‘soccer’”

by the time you guys were done, it was 3am and you were too pumped to go to sleep

so thor told you stories of his home and battle and family

you didn’t want him to stop, you were fascinated by it all

and uhhhh yeah then earth kinda had some vikings show up

they told you that you’d “make a fine warrior one day”

and then yall got attacked by a ????? a what??? a destroyer???????

“get y/n out of here now! they shouldn’t have to see this!” -thor

you were still nearby and saw thor become thor again

after he was done fighting the destroyer, you ran to give him a hug

“that was awesome! can i hold your hammer?”

“maybe someday, little one”

then you didn’t see him for 2 years

which upset your mom a good bit, you had to help her through that episode. lots of sitting on the couch and eating ice cream together talking about how he wasn’t worth her time even tho you missed him too

but he came back! and then your mom sent everything flying bc she had an “infinity stone” inside her and thor took you two to asgard

“y/n! you’ve grown so much, i almost didn’t recognize you!” -thor

tbh you really digged the outfit they gave you, but also you were on another planet? thor insisted on giving you a tour (by flying you around)

“i do hope you’re having fun, little one!”

worrying about your mom simultaneously bc you overheard she was sick

but asgard got attacked and you and jane were confined to a room in the palace, which sucked because you wanted to see it all

but thor sent guards to bring you anything to keep you entertained

“maybe we’ll skip the mace for now, thank you” -jane

after several events that count as child endangerment, this chapter came to an end and your mom and thor finally made it official

loki called you a rodent and then saved your life so you were kinda iffy about him

about a year or two later, your mom had to travel a great deal in order to get some work done, so you were left in the care of thor, who took you to avengers tower

“oh, my girlfriend’s child is an angel! and they’re so intelligent, just like their mother!” -thor gushing to other partygoers

“yeah, thor, your ‘angel’ is sneaking drinks from the elderly” -tony

*sipping his beer* “they’re a growing teenager”

you did have an amazing time interacting with the avengers

and once they tried grabbing the hammer, you knew you had to get in on it (but you failed like the rest)

“don’t worry, my y/n, you have to be eighteen years of age to be able to lift mjölnir!” -thor

“oh, that makes sense!” -you, while thor aggressively shakes his head at the other avengers. he just wanted to make sure you didn’t feel bad you weren’t worthy yet :(

more child endangerment but really what did you expect?

thor went off world and your mom split it off w him but you did have his email so you were still in contact with him

swearing you saw odin on the street once or twice (fast forward)

and then your mom dusted and thor found you as soon as he possibly could, it was so good to see him

he took you in since you were alone now, you moved to new asgard and became prince(ss) of the new land by relation?? makes sense right

basically you and valkyrie made all the calls while thor grieved for years

but he still took care of you

“y/n, would you like to play video games with me? i think it may be a good bonding experience, what do you say?” -thor

“duh!”

uncle korg made you help him with fortnite while thor was asleep

you wished to wield stormbreaker one day

showing thor earth media! his favorite star wars character is r2-d2 dont ask why

he taught you asgardian recipes and you taught him...earth recipes?

when he was drunk he’d ramble on about his childhood and battle and enemies and jane and loki and hela and frigga and literally anything that came to mind

“y/n, could you please get me a beer? and get one for yourself, too” -thor

valkyrie most definitely gave you some battle training so you you blow off some steam, you were glad she taught you how to fight like a true warrior

thor wanted to teach you battle tactics so you could fight alongside him, but he never got around to it

a raccoon and bruce banner visited later on, proposing a way to get your family back, thor was an emotional wreck

his debriefing on the reality stone was tense when he started crying about your mom and everyone stared at you

“hey, don’t look at me. i don’t control the god, i just keep him company”

ending up waiting 1 second for the avengers to come back from their mission, resulting in you being stuck in the middle of a very heavy battle

“y/n, get out of here!” -thor

“don’t worry, thor! valkyrie taught me a few moves!”

“you make me incredibly proud, little one!”

“i’m not so little anymore, am i?”

“you will always be my little one, y/n. blood or not, that will not change!”

victory, but at what cost? it was a rough ride, you needed to get patched up, but your mom was finally home and thor...he decided it was time to leave earth again

“don’t worry, my y/n. i will see you again.” *tearing up* “i’m so glad i got the pleasure of raising you these past few years. i love you dearly, now go be with your mother”

you straight up wanted to bawl your eyes out right there

“well, y/n, you’re next in line for the throne of new asgard. what is your first command?” -valkyrie

“actually, i think you’d make a much better ruler than me. i’ve got to spend some time with my mother now that she’s home”

“you’re so much like him, you know that?”

staying with your mother, who was diagnosed with cancer not long after returning from the soul stone (a/n: jane getting cancer is canon in the comics and confirmed for thor 4)

“i missed five years of your life and now i’m sick, that’s just our luck, isn’t it?” -jane

she was understandably upset, but she also felt guilty

“mom, don’t beat yourself up. everything is okay, we’re still together right now. i won’t be going anywhere, i promise”

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#thor odinson x child!reader #thor odinson x reader #thor odinson imagine #thor odinson #thor #thor x reader #thor imagine #marvel #marvel x reader #marvel imagine #avengers x reader #avengers imagine #avengers #jane foster #jane foster x child!reader #jane foster x reader #jane foster imagine

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whatifxwereyou · 3 years

Text

Ashes Chapter 6: Level-Headed

Pairing: Liu Kang x Reader

You meet Nightwolf. Turns out that he's a really good dude. Liu Kang is still having a tough time but he is seeming at least a bit more like himself. He's got a level-head but now you're the one who can't keep it together. And who could blame you?

A/N: I am just so happy that other people like reading the nonsense I write. I know it's not the best but I'm having fun writing it and it's even more fun getting to enjoy it with people <3 Sorry I'm so sentimental lately. Just feeling really loved and I want to spread that love~

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The next day was awkward but you weren’t biting each other’s heads off at least. You were both too tired, it seemed. Liu Kang had a big red comical handprint on his face that morning but it faded by the afternoon. You were both unhappy but you supposed this might have been progress since you weren’t snapping at each other. Either that or you’d taken ten steps backwards and said things you didn’t mean and had done irreparable damage to your friendship.

By the evening you were drawing close to the spot on the map, or at least you thought you were. “Look.” You gestured to a cabin in the distance. You could barely make it out between the trees. Then there was the howling of wolves and you heard their footfalls running toward you, the shadows of the hulking beasts flittering between the trees. It was only seconds before you were surrounded by wolves enveloped in green mist.

You drew closer to Liu Kang and summoned a sword with your ink. Liu stood at the ready but didn’t summon his fire yet. Neither one of you liked to hurt animals, even when they were aggressive. Besides, the floaty green mist made it seem like you were out of your league with these wolves.

They didn’t attack. Instead the voice of a man broke through their howling and the dogs silenced as he walked amongst them. Tall, with messy dark hair, dark eyes and tan skin, the man’s presence was commanding. This had to be Nightwolf or at least someone in close relation to him.

“What brings you to this place?”

Liu made to speak but you grabbed his arm to silence him. He’d caused more than enough trouble with his mouth the past week and you no longer trusted him. “We’ve come to talk.” You dug in your bag and one of the wolves growled. Intimidated, you felt Liu Kang step before you defensively. You reached into the bag and dug for the wolf charm you’d been given. Then you presented it to the man and the wolves disappeared. The man turned away from you.

“Come.”

You exchanged a nervous glance with Liu who remained tense after you’d interrupted him. He nodded to let you know he was okay and you followed the man into the cabin. “You’re Nightwolf.” Liu Kang wanted to make sure.

“Yes, that is what they call me now. You must be trusted to have been given this location and that trinket.” He addressed you and you offered a polite bow.

“I’m Y/N and this is Liu Kang. We’ve come a long way to talk to you.” For a while, the conversation went smoothly. Liu Kang explained the dragon marking and its significance, showing off his own and having you express that you had one too. He explained the nature of the realms, of Lord Raiden, of the war that was likely coming and that you needed him to speak with Lord Raiden and come train in his temple. You were grateful that Liu Kang had somehow managed to have a civil conversation with someone. One point in the win column against a thousand in the lose column. That was something.

But Nightwolf didn’t seem eager to join you and instead mulled over your information. You couldn’t blame him. This was a lot and some of it was beyond belief without proof. If you hadn’t been thrown into the whole mix against your will, then you would have struggled with it too. You’d had nowhere else to run at the time and had been in over your head with unruly arcana and visions from the past.

“I have a duty here in America. I’ll have to think about it.” At least he was honest.

And reasonable. Leaving everything that he’d ever known was a huge decision. It didn’t mean that he wouldn’t return someday but there was also a chance that he would die. What you did was dangerous. Your lives tended to be short. You held your bag a little closer.

“I’m to bring you to Raiden’s Temple. I won’t leave without you.” Liu was sounding harsh again so you sighed. Maybe that was why Raiden had sent you together. Liu Kang was too grief stricken and angry to do his job on his own and you were too swept up in guilt to stay focused. You balanced each other in a horrible way.

“That decision is not yours to make, friend.” Nightwolf was incredibly respectful considering Liu Kang’s tone but the air became tense.

“I understand your hesitation, but would you give me a chance to try and convince you? You have a little time to think about it but we’re not sure how much. The longer you get to train the better off we’ll be. We have no idea how long before Outworld strikes again.” You tried to play mediator. Liu Kang’s hand grasped your arm and you nearly snarled in anger but somehow managed to get yourself together.

“We don’t have time for this, Y/N.” Liu scolded you.

“We do. You’re being impatient. Take a breath.” You narrowed your eyes at him dangerously.

“Excuse me, then.” He gritted his teeth and walked out the door, slamming it behind him. His temper was out of control. You winced at the sound of the door slamming. You missed him. You wanted him to be okay.

“I’m sorry. It’s been difficult. This war has taken a toll on us all.” You offered an excuse and a smile.

“He seems troubled.”

“He’s a good man, I promise. Just having a hard time right now.”

“You seem troubled.” Nightwolf added with a knowing glance. He was a good judge of character. He was calming and you were grateful for that because you had enough frustration from Liu’s attitude. If you snapped, it would have made Liu Kang’s poor attitude look like child’s play.

“And I’ll be okay too.”

“So, tell me, Miss Y/N. Why do you think that I should help you?”

“Well, it’s not me that you’re helping, that’s why. It’s not us. Earthrealm is our home, warts and all. If we have any strength then we have a responsibility to protect it in any way that we can, no matter what that means.”

“A wise answer.” He smiled and you were relieved. “Is that why you do this?”

“Ultimately, yes.” You had found, over the years, that honesty was the best policy. There were plenty of times where it didn’t work, but Nightwolf seemed to be looking for honesty. You had a feeling he would be able to tell if you lied. “I was sort of thrust into this at first. I had nowhere to go after my mark and so I was brought to Raiden’s Temple, which I fought, and then I was too sick to leave. I fought at first because I didn’t know what else to do. I was lost. But with time and understanding, I found that no matter what other reasons I had, I would fight to protect the place and people that I loved. This is my home, and I am willing to die to keep it safe.”

“But you weren’t at first?”

It felt like a test, and you hoped beyond hope that you were passing. You’d failed enough the last few months, you couldn’t risk another check in that column.

“I was overwhelmed with the scope of the danger and truth of all this. In the beginning, I treated it kind of like a joke because I didn’t understand. I knew, deep down, that it was the right thing to do but I had no other reason than that. That changed, of course. I think it’s normal to want to think it over. Liu Kang thinks it is too, he’s just not himself right now. I hope that you don’t judge him too harshly for his temper. It’s not like him.”

“I appreciate your honesty, Y/N.” He stood and walked to the counter, picking up a clear bottle filled with tan liquid. “You look like you could use a drink.”

“You have no idea.” You laughed and he joined you in having one. As long as you weren’t with Liu, there was no risk of you making another stupid mistake. And as long as one didn’t become ten, the risk of that was even lower.

Nightwolf turned out to be a kind and interesting man. He had struggled with his mark because the mark meant that he was special. You understood how that felt. Embracing the fate of something beyond your control had scared you too, but it had been worth it in the end. You listened to him as he shared his story and you shared a drink. You were a good listener. You always had been, and he seemed to appreciate the ear.

When your glasses were drained, he took them and set them aside which you were grateful for. “There are couches and some blankets that are open to you and your friend. I’ll make my decision as soon as I can, but I make no promises as to what that decision might be. You have been patient with me, and I appreciate that patience. I will do what I can.”

“This is a big decision but time is of the essence. Still, I want you to take that time.” You wouldn’t push him into giving up his life as he knew it to travel halfway across the world. You wouldn’t push anyone who didn’t deserve pushing. You also had the feeling that he was going to help. He seemed like a kind and powerful man whose motives were morally aligned with yours. You were grateful for that. So many with the dragon marking had wound up being scumbags.

“Thank you. Get some rest, Y/N.”

“I will. You too.” You watched him leave and then were left alone in the kitchen. You set your bag down on the smaller couch and walked outside. There was a firepit near the house and several overturned logs that served as benches. You sat on one of the logs and faced away from the firepit. The sky was overcast that night so you couldn’t see the stars but watching the clouds was soothing too.

Then Liu Kang sat next to you.

This was all too familiar now. You watched the clouds and were at peace for a short time.

“I’m apologizing again.”

“Oh. What for now?” You couldn’t help it. The sarcasm came out. He mulled it over as if to be thinking through the list of nonsense that he’d done in the last few days that he had to apologize for. Then he gestured back to the cabin.

“Being a jerk about this whole thing, for one.”

“That is just not specific enough, I’m afraid.” You turned to him.

“Being short with Nightwolf. He deserved time to mull it over.”

“I know he did. You know he did. You’ve got to figure out this temper that you’ve developed, Liu.”

“I don’t know where it came from. I always had such control.” He slumped his shoulders.

“You’re grieving.”

“Yeah, but so are you and you aren’t jumping down everyone’s throats for no reason.”

“Not when you’re looking, at least.” You were still angry with him even if he seemed willing to talk. He’d upset you. An apology wasn’t enough.

“I’ve got to get it together.” He held his head in his hands and pushed his hair back, disgusted with himself. The sound he made would have been funny if you hadn’t been a terrible mixture of mad at him and worried for him.

“Do you know what I keep thinking? What I keep wishing for?”

“Kung Lao to be back?” He said in a tired drone.

“No. I keep hoping that you find peace. I’m crushed by his death, Liu, but you’re broken.” You watched the clouds again. You wanted him to be okay, but you couldn’t be an emotional punching bag for him to figure it out with. He watched you and you could feel his eyes taking you in longer than they should have. He scooted closer. He probably didn’t believe you, and you couldn’t blame him.

“Your being here helps.”

Bullshit.

You laughed in disbelief. Liu Kang radiated with fire and you knew that feeling all too well and scooted a little away.

“Really? Because I feel like I’m actively making it worse.”

“Well, it’s complicated, isn’t it?”

“That’s a good word for it.”

“You remind me of him. You make it real. But also, you’re my friend. You were more than that.” He shrugged, clasping his hands in front of him, elbows on his knees. “We never really talked about it and it made things so hard.”

“We’re talking right now. We’ve talked and yelled a lot the last few days.” You were tired of talking about your grief in vague niceties. You were tired of being comforting. Of fighting.

“Not Kung Lao. Not grief.” He gestured between you and then returned his hands to his knees as if he had more control of them there. “About this.” You sighed heavily. Hadn’t you slapped him real hard about it the night before? “About what it was before you decided on Kung Lao.”

“I didn’t decide anything, remember? We did talk about it, Liu Kang. And you said that it wasn’t like it meant anything. That I didn’t owe you anything. A keep the change sort of comment. Remember?” You didn’t want to talk about it. You were so tired of fighting with him. It felt endless. How could Raiden do this to you? Why? Had you offended him in some way? Had your grief over Kung Lao not been loud and sad enough? “It doesn’t matter what you meant then, Liu, because that was what I was left with and so that was what I believed for years.”

“Except that I did that for Kung Lao. Do I not get to talk about it?”

“Sometimes it’s better to leave the past in the past and move on.”

“Except that it isn’t the past anymore, Y/N.” He grabbed your arm and urged you to look at him. You stiffened up. “I guess that you were hoping we’d just never talk about the other night. You keep running off. I tried to say something in the motel but you shut me down hard.”

“You can’t do this.” You struggled to speak without your voice trembling. His eyes were so dark and sad and full of fire, his lips twitching in a way where you couldn’t take your eyes off of them. “You can’t just bring it up whenever it’s convenient for you. You can’t just… wreck my emotions on repeat because you’re grieving. I’m grieving too.”

“Yeah, well you can’t just crawl into my bed and leave a bunch of scars down my back and then fuck off because it’s convenient for you.”

You were exasperated and threw your hands up in frustration. “We were drunk! Obliterated!”

“I wasn’t that drunk. I remember, Y/N.”

“Yeah, well I was. It was a mistake, Liu Kang. A grievous, drunken error that has only made things exponentially more difficult. I was sad and vulnerable and wasted. I made a mistake, okay? So maybe, just maybe, you can eat some of those lies you told me years ago. It’s not like it meant anything.” You spat with some venom and were surprised with yourself, covering your mouth after you’d said it. Oh, that hurt.

“I’m done lying, Y/N. I was never good at it. You’re not either.” He hadn’t yelled at you, which surprised you. In fact, he seemed to have a level head on more than you did. “It wasn’t a mistake for me. I knew what I was doing. I get that you’re trying to hurt me because you’re mad and grieving.” He said that in such an annoying way that you could have smacked him again. “But I’m saying now what I should have said all those years ago. It meant something. It meant something then and I knew what would happen if I went through with it the other night and I chose to anyway.” Liu was going to kill you at this rate. You were just going to drop dead. “Maybe I needed to feel something other than angry and sad. Maybe I thought I should try and undo something I regretted.”

Why was he so level-headed? Why, in this moment, had he managed to keep back his temper? If you could just yell at each other and hate each other it would be so much easier. But you didn’t hate him, you were torn between wanting to shake some sense into him and kiss him and it was so frustrating. Kissing him would only leave you more hurt but it seemed like the easier option too. You didn’t. You fought it, even if he seemed to be drawing closer. The tension of Liu Kang was so thick you could barely breathe.

“It was a mistake, Liu.” Your words were shaky but you tried to stand your ground. You’d beaten yourself up over this for too long and there he was, making it so much more complicated.

“Was it, Y/N? It didn’t feel like it was. It didn’t sound like it was.” His voice was low and serious and you felt your stomach twist into knots. “Look me in the eyes and tell me it was a mistake. That it was all a mistake. That it didn’t crush you when I said that all those years ago? That it had ever stopped being passionate between us even when we weren’t together. Tell me that. Look me in the eye and tell me that’s your truth and I will drop it.” He grasped your cheek and urged you to look him in the eyes.

You tried.

You couldn’t.

You were going to burst into tears at this rate and then he’d hold you and kiss you and you’d end up making this even more complicated and you couldn’t do that. Not right now. Not when he’d taken everything you’d known as truth and thrown it out the window. “I’m grieving Kung Lao and...” You couldn’t finish it. You couldn’t because it had never been a mistake to you back then. He was the one who had drawn the line in the sand. You’d just believed what he’d wanted you to believe for Kung Lao’s sake. And the other night was not something you remembered. There were only flashes of hot and sweaty lovemaking and all that version of you had felt was pleasure. Liu pulled his hand back and sighed.

“Figures that you would honor his memory more than think about yourself. He’d remind you that you were a terrible liar.”

You wiped your eyes as they betrayed you with tears and struggled to find words that didn’t involve crying or sobbing. You didn’t want to cry in front of him, damnit. You didn’t want to cry because of him. “This isn’t fair. It isn’t fair, Liu Kang. You can’t just… I can’t take much more.”

“I’m not trying to mess with your head, Y/N. I’m not trying to hurt you. You feel guilty but you don’t have any reason to. You think I don’t feel guilty? It’s eating me up. But we owe it to ourselves, don’t we? To figure it out?”

“Why are you being like this? Why now? Why?” You wiped furiously at your eyes. Stupid tears. You were so tired of your eyes being puffy and painful all the time. Stupid Liu Kang and his stupid emotions and his stupid whirlwind of honesty and misplaced anger. Stupid Kung Lao, dying and leaving you to deal with this. Stupid Raiden not sending you alone.

“I think that you turned down Kung Lao’s proposal because you were worried that maybe you still had feelings for me and had to figure that out first.”

That was the last straw. You broke.

You hated that it was partially true. You’d never stopped being attracted to him and that had become painfully obvious. What a selfish reason it had been to turn down the love of a man who had been dedicated to you and you alone. You swore that your heart was shutting down, it was beating so hard. He had you confused. Was that part of the reason? You didn’t know because you hadn’t been given the chance to figure it out. The truth was that you probably would have married Kung Lao. You would have talked about your plans for the future, what he saw of it, what you saw of it, and then accepted his proposal. You hadn’t turned it down because you didn’t love him. You had turned it down because you’d needed to talk. You were less spontaneous than Kung Lao had been. The only reason he’d needed was love and you’d needed to know more details. That was it. Liu Kang was making you overthink in ways you hadn’t in years.

“I can’t do this.” You stood and Liu grabbed your arm before you could leave. His fingers brushed down your wrist and to your hand and he gave you a look as if begging you to stay. It was killing you.

“We can’t avoid this forever.”

“I let you have your time to process this bullshit, Liu Kang and you are going to let me have mine.” He didn’t let you go. His grip tightened on your hand as if afraid to let you walk away, as if you would never come back. “Liu Kang?”

“Don’t go, Y/N.”

“You will let go of me right this instant.” You avoided his eyes. “You have ignored my feelings in favor of yours for long enough tonight. Let me go.”

Liu’s grip tightened but then he very suddenly let go and turned away with a bow of his head. “Of course, Y/N.”

The panic as you marched back inside the cabin and sat down on the couch was killing you. You held your head in your hands. What were you supposed to do with this? You had to calm down, first and foremost. Thankfully, Liu didn’t follow you inside and you had some peace and quiet but your thoughts weren’t much better than his argument had been.

You’d fucked up.

It would have been so much easier if neither one of you felt anything. It would have been easier if he had been as drunk as you had been. It would have been easier if you could continue believing that it really had meant nothing. It had never meant nothing to you. It had crushed you and taken you months to recover from that sadness with no one to talk to about it. You may not have remembered the other night but you remembered him from all those years ago.

The hot nights, the times you’d spent devoted to each other’s bodies, tangled up in his sheets or in yours. He’d made you feel sexy and forbidden, something beyond desire that no one else had ever made you feel. You hated those memories for so long that it was hard to feel any way other than that.

You loved Kung Lao.

But would you have even gotten the chance to if Liu Kang hadn’t said what he’d said? You had this connection, this fire that you couldn’t put out even after years of letting it simmer down. Even now when you’d fought, you had known that if you didn’t get out of there then you would have given into that passion, that instinct. What a mess of a human being you were. You curled up on the couch and this time you didn’t pull your bag close to you. You couldn’t think about Kung Lao when you were like this.

Next Chapter >>

#liu kang x reader #self insert #reader insert #liu kang #mk liu kang #mortal kombat movie #mortal kombat 2021 #ludi lin #liu kang/reader #liu kang x you #liu kang/you #fanfic #fanfiction #angst #romance #death #tension #grief #beauty through ash

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yongtxt · 4 years

Text

hundred [johnny]

word count: 4.5k words

characters: boxer!johnny x doctor!reader

genre: fluff

warnings: blood/wound/stitches mentions, johnny hates hospitals but he likes the pretty doctor, [im not a doctor nor a boxer pls dont say that i have info wrong because I Know]

author’s note: i know this isnt long to some of u but to me it is and i havent written this much for so long im so proud of myself for finishing this:( it isnt that good but this is the first long fic ive written in a while and shhsdjk also i needed to get this out of my system ive thought about this au since that jcc came out where johnny and hyuck was doing muay thai plssss (i couldnt find a better gif tho) ok this is getting too long / feedback is appreciated tysm

Johnny Suh hated hospitals with a burning passion.

It wasn't from a past trauma nor was he afraid of it, it wasn't that serious. He wasn't exactly sure what the cause of it really was. If he had to make a guess, it was probably from the accumulation of the little things, the insignificant factors people would usually dismiss but bothered him enough that it contributed to the big hatred he built for hospitals.

Maybe it was the distinct smell of hospitals, it reeked of death and old people. Maybe it was the atmosphere of the fluorescent-lit hallways, always gloomy and heavy. Maybe it was also the fact that the fees were so expensive and yet the food they provide tasted horrible, even the coffee was a hit or miss. The only upside he could think of was people get better in hospitals, but even that wasn't assured.

Despite how much Johnny despised hospitals, he always finds himself coming back. If he wanted to get better, he had no choice but to go. He would endure the gruesome process over and over again whether it be to treat his wounds or to stitch his cuts.

With his jaw littered with small bruises and his lips busted at the corner, he sat impatiently on the hospital bed as he waited for his doctor. He was fiddling with his fingers, knuckles bruised the same way his face was. He looked beaten up, he always did.

The clothes he wore contradicted the state he was in, they were fresh and laid back. He looked like a college student from the way he dressed. A delinquent more like, if one considered his cuts and bruises. Before heading to the hospital, he always makes it a point to shower and make himself appear presentable to the public. Although no one really bothers to take notice of his effort, only him.

The sliding door opened and Johnny's attention shot up from his phone, his gaze meeting with yours. Your head popped in, peaking through the small crack you made. Your eyes lit up in recognition as it always did whenever you see him.

"Youngho-ssi?" You spoke almost as if it was a question, voice barely above a whisper to make sure you were in the correct room, about to tend the correct patient.

Johnny didn't understand why you always did that, call out his name as if this was the first time you were seeing him. At that point, you've been already acquainted with him enough due to his numerous trips to the hospital. Either way, he nods every time.

You gave him a small smile, widening the door enough so you could enter. You wore a white lab coat, a name tag pinned to your chest and a stethoscope hung around your neck. You were small, although anyone compared to him was bound to be comparatively smaller – that wasn't the point, you looked young and that never fails to astound him every time you go through the door.

You had a clipboard in your hands, scanning through what he assumed to be his condition that a nurse had written earlier after a quick checkup and disinfection of his open wound. Your lips were formed on a tight line, eyebrows furrowed. He continued to stare at you with such amusement.

"You don't have to answer my question, Youngho-ssi, but why are you always here?" You finally broke the silence, startling him in the slightest. You never bothered to ask before, always just offering smiles and small talks while you did your work; maybe his sudden regularity of coming to the hospital recently made your curiosity peaked.

He couldn't blame you. Anybody would be curious why a 24-year-old man keeps coming back to the hospital with no clear explanation.

He cleared his suddenly dry throat, he never liked saying his job. He said, "I box for a living."

"Ah, that makes sense!" Your eyes visibly glimmered, absentmindedly jotting down notes on his medical records. "My coworkers and I thought you were in a gang or something."

"I don't think I would be allowed to be here if I was." He chuckled, making you giggle as well.

"Seo Youngho, 24, minor lip laceration in need of immediate suture." You read of his data from the clipboard, almost comically. It was medical terms he was unfortunately already too familiar with, to him, it basically meant that he had a busted lip that needs to be sewed shut.

"You can just call me Johnny. Youngho sounds too formal to me." He said nonchalantly. You nodded your head to his simple request; it probably was best if you got to know him better since he frequented the hospital so much.

"Alright, Johnny. We'll start the process now, okay?"

With keen eyes, he watched you slip on a pair of surgical gloves. You grabbed a tissue from the metal tray that sat beside him and began folding it into squares. He felt his heartbeat quicken, he hated getting stitches or any form of medical treatments for that matter, but as morbid as it was, he thought of it as punishment for his recklessness in the ring.

"Isn't boxing just, I don't know, senseless violence?" You asked, tone dripping with pure innocence and unadulterated interest as you gently dabbed away the remaining dried blood the nurse failed to clean earlier.

"It's a sport, it's how I bring money to the table." He pursed his lips, ignoring the twinge of pain that surged through his nerves. He visibly relaxed when you placed a hand onto his shoulder to reassure him.

Ever since the first time you got assigned to him, the first thing he took note of was the softness of your hands. You handled him as if he was fragile glass, despite how he easily towered over you. He felt pathetic as a 24-year-old but your gentle touches would greatly help put him at ease.

"I guess. I didn't mean to be rude." You were hesitant, Johnny could tell but he was glad you didn't push on any further. He couldn't handle explaining his occupation when you were about to pierce his skin. "Okay, Johnny, now that your lip is clean and the anesthesia had seeped in, we'll start. I think you know how it goes by now."

"Make it quick, please." He nodded, squinting his eyes shut at the mere contact of a surgical pen grazing over his gaped lips. You were relieved that his cut wasn't too big, you couldn't stomach the idea of putting him in too much pain for longer.

As you picked up the tweezers and string of nylon, you couldn't help but laugh at the six-foot boxer in front of you who was clearly petrified of getting stitches, "This will be done as soon as you know it. You won't really feel it because of the anesthesia, remember? Now count to a hundred backward for me."

Once the numb feeling of nylon dragged through his lips, he swore he saw white spots flicker in his vision. His eyes immediately watered and he tried his best not to squirm under your hold, beginning to count to a hundred backward like you had instructed him to. You admitted it to him the first time you stitched him that it was a trick that you learned from your pediatrician friend. Despite it being for children, it helped to get him distracted while you focused on your job.

Minutes felt like hours, Johnny had been fighting the urge to punch something, anything, to release tension and nerves. Swallowing the lump in his throat, he took a peak and tried to take his attention away from what was currently happening on his lip. His gaze landed on your pretty eyes, how it was narrowed in focus and how your lashes perfectly framed it.

This wasn't the first time he'd observe you up close, there had been many occasions in the past that you had been too close for comfort in order to tend his wounds. It had been too many that it was almost as if he was close to memorizing your features. You were not only beautiful but you were also a smart and capable doctor.

Eventually, you finished and started to rub ointment on his sore lip — the finishing line.

"Try not to eat anything spicy or hard. You know the drill." You grinned at his suddenly pale features, ripping off your gloves as his eyes adjusted to the bright lights of the room. "You're good to go. Be careful next time."

He let out a shaky breath, clearly still winded up from the procedure, "I'll try. Thanks again, doc."

The punching bag felt great against Johnny's fists. There wasn't a feeling in the world that could compare to the impact of leather slamming against his skin. He could last hours mindlessly pummeling the bag if his stamina just allowed him to.

Hyunsik, Johnny's manager and personal trainer, drew away from the punching bag he held in between his arms. He let out a breath and held out a hand to motion that Johnny has done enough.

Johnny was hurting, Hyunsik could see that much. The bandages he had wrapped for the boxer's fingers were turning into a shade of red that they were all too familiar with.

Hyunsik clicked his tongue, "You should've used your gloves."

"How can I grow stronger if I keep relying on them?" Johnny rolled his eyes. His muscles needed a boost and this seemed to be the only logical way to strengthen them — a little blood never hurt anybody.

"Someday you're gonna fracture your hand and you'll be forced out of the ring. Remember that." Hyunsik huffed, his voice stern. "Take them off, I'll clean the blood off."

Johnny reluctantly did as told, unfurling the bandages wrapped around his fingers. The pain was excruciating when the fabric grazed along his tender skin, he winced at the unsightly view of his reopened wounds.

Hyunsik led him back outside of the ring to the benches where the first aid kit was. He made the boxer sit down so he could start cleaning off his wounds. It looked horrific, more so than it usually did and he had no choice but to break the news to Johnny.

"It looks really bad. You need to go get that checked in the hospital and have it sewed back." Hyunsik said, taking a wet towel and carefully dabbing it across Johnny's bloodied knuckles.

He didn't want to go to the hospital. Going to the hospital to have his wounds treated meant that Johnny would be medically required to take days off work to let his hand heal. Johnny frowned, "Don't you have an ointment or something that could help? I can't afford to lose a day of practice."

"Don't you think I know that?" Hyunsik rolled his eyes. "As your manager, I want you to be in top shape for your match next week, even if it means sacrificing a day or two for you to heal."

Johnny could only nod. He sat through Hyunsik's lecture on the changes he should make to his dietary plan and the exercises he should do during his temporary break. It infuriated him that he couldn't do anything about it but nod along.

The incoming match that was set next week would make or break his career as an underground boxer. He didn't have the option of missing it because of some measly reopened wounds. If he had to rest to get better, he had no choice but to suck it up. This was his fault anyway for pushing himself too much.

Johnny showered in the locker rooms and changed into nicer clothes that didn't reek of blood and sweat. His hands were stinging but he shook it off.

He ignored the concerned looks other boxers were giving him and begrudgingly made his way to the hospital to get himself checked in. You wouldn't be happy to see him all bloodied again, he thought.

Much to Johnny's surprise, it wasn't you who was assigned to him. It was a much older doctor with graying hair and a nose stuck too far up in the air. She was rude and condescending, her lack of politeness to her patients was quite appalling. If Johnny wasn't in such a bad mood, he might've complained already.

God, this day couldn't get any worse.

With a meek voice, Johnny asked where you were and at the mention of your name, his doctor gave him a narrowed look. She sneered, "She's handling much more important cases. Does she know you?"

"I think so." Johnny gulped, unsure of the answer himself.

The doctor's grip was tight and she was hasty. It was as if she was trying to speed through the process to just get it over with. Johnny wanted to cry because he was starting to get traumatized by this doctor's procedure, he didn't want to hate the hospital more than he already did.

He internally screamed for your name as he watched the doctor pull on the gloves. The sliding door harshly whipped open and there you were in all your glory, like an angel sent from above to save him from the devil incarnate who was about to pierce his skin.

You were panting and the sheen on your forehead made it obvious that you ran your way to his room. Johnny's heart leaped with glee.

"Unnie, I'll handle him." You said, unable to catch your breath as you made your way inside. "I think the ER needs you more than me."

The doctor seemed hesitant at first but you tried to convince her otherwise. She eventually agreed and left you with Johnny who had a cheesy smile on his face the entire time since you've arrived.

"So Johnny, what happened this time?" You asked, picking up the clipboard that sat next to him on the bed.

"I overdid the punching during training and it reopened some old wounds on my knuckles. It hurts like a bitch."

You pulled a face, "That's a bit intense."

He chuckled, "It's normal."

"Can I please see it?" You opened your palm so he could place his hand on yours. You observed his cuts and the scabs that were beginning to form around it, it was too deep to let it heal on its own so you made the verdict that he needed to get it sewed back together ⁠— as unfortunate as it was since he was a boxer and he needed his hands to box.

You tugged on a new pair of gloves and began the painful procedure, Johnny started counting down even without you instructing him to. You quickly got to work and stitched back his wounds with your lip in between your teeth

Johnny felt squeamish, he could never get used to the feeling of stitches. His eyes were glued shut and he mumbled numbers like it was mantra.

Once you were done, you smiled fondly at your work. You managed to get by with fewer stitches and you felt pride swell up in your chest. Johnny noticed and, as lightheaded as he was, couldn't help but smile as well.

"You're pretty good."

"At stitching?"

Johnny nodded with his cheeks flushed, he made a mental reminder to smack himself in the head later for such a crude comment. You probably thought he was an idiot now.

"I sure hope so." You chuckled, making him blush even deeper if that was even possible. "It's part of my job."

Johnny shook his head in embarrassment, his dark hair bouncing from how vigorously he did it. He mumbled, "That sounded really lame and not smooth, I'm sorry. Please forget I opened my mouth."

You could only chuckle as you apply the ointment around his knuckles. He wanted the ground to open up and just swallow him whole.

"Please let this heal completely, Johnny. Don't apply any strain on your injuries for a couple of days and refrain yourself from carrying anything heavy so that the stitches won't rip." You said, carefully placing down his hand back on his knee. You were gentle as ever, Johnny swooned. "Absolutely no punching for a while."

"I have an important match at the end of next week. Is there any way to speed up the healing process?" Johnny asked, his eyes were almost pleading at you and you blinked at him in surprise.

"Apart from what I just said, there's really nothing else you could do." You pursed your lips, watching his expression visibly deflate. "If you want to have even a sliver of a chance at winning your match, I suggest you do as I say. Your stitches won't take too long to heal, I promise."

If Hyunsik was there with him, he would've probably already scolded him but the point would be the same. He had always prioritized Johnny's health above winning.

"Okay, doc. I'll do my best." Johnny said, defeated.

"You know, I always see the aftermath of your matches and your training. I want to see you in the ring next time when you're not bloody and beaten up yet." You smiled at him and you swore that all the color that was previously drained from Johnny's face came rushing back. "If it's okay."

"Are you serious?" Johnny asked, almost dumbfounded. Did the pretty doctor he'd been crushing on for months really just asked if she could watch his match?

You nodded with the same hue of red now tainting your cheeks.

"O-Of course! It's on Saturday next week! Please come and cheer me on!" Like a little kid, he excitedly rambled on about the details about the upcoming match and you nodded with the same enthusiast as you wrapped bandages around his hands.

You weren't from his world so everything he said sounded foreign to you. The terms he said, the infamy of his opponents, the prominence of it all — you were eager to learn it if it meant seeing him this happy.

You've always known that he hated hospitals. It was clear from the way he acted during your first meeting. He was stiff and tense, the body language he exuded just screamed that he wanted nothing more than to get the hell out of there. As he visited the hospital more and more, you noticed the hatred never faltered. He only became better at hiding it from you.

To see him so relaxed and carefree within the four walls he hated with all his being, it was a breath of fresh air and the feeling you had in your chest grew stronger.

"You're good to go. I promise to see you in your match." You were jotting some last-minute details on the clipboard and you missed the way Johnny kept grinning like an idiot. "As much as I love seeing you here, I hate that you keep getting yourself injured. Keep out of trouble for me, Johnny."

You left the room without letting Johnny say another word.

Fuck, Johnny realized he hadn't asked for your number.

Johnny's match started in ten minutes. His heart was pounding in his ears, he almost couldn't hear what Hyunsik was shouting to him.

The underground stadium was filled to the brim with people, he felt more nervous than he did during his first boxing match. A lot was at stake for this win, he needed the belt. He was desperate for it.

"Johnny, are you listening to me?" Hyunsik raised his voice, aggressively slapping Johnny's cheeks together in his hands so he could focus on him. The boxer's mind was fleeting and it was his job to pull him back to reality now.

He hadn't seen you since last week and as much as he wanted to go back to the hospital to see you, he refused to badly hurt himself in the days that led up to the match. Johnny scanned the crowd for your face but he couldn't see it. You weren't there.

At the lack of your turnout, he failed to mask his disappointment. Hyunsik let out an aggravated groan and pulled the boxer on his feet to berate him further.

"Johnny, please for the love of all things holy, look me in the eye."

"I'm sorry. I'm okay now. I'm listening."

"Good because your match is starting soon and I need you to win this. All your hardships and sacrifices boils down to this match, you hear me?" Hyunsik bellowed, trying his best to keep his voice louder than the cries and chants of the audience. "Show them what Johnny Suh is capable of!"

Johnny nodded fervently, forcing himself into a state of serenity of peacefulness. He let out heavy breaths to even out his breathing as his team surrounded him, prepping him for what was about to come.

Hyunsik raised his hand at Johnny. He had five minutes left until his match started and he wasn't calming down.

"Can I please have some water?" Johnny asked and his medic stumbled on his feet to fetch him a bottle from the nearby cooler. He couldn't help but let out a shaky chuckle, his team seemed tenser than he was.

He downed the bottle as soon as it reached his hand. His hand was shaky. Goddammit, why was he so nervous?

At the corner of his eye, he saw Hyunsik making his way over to the barricade that separated his corner to the rest of the stadium. He arched his neck in a way that would let him take a peek what was so important that Hyunsik had to leave his side when the match was starting in a few minutes.

It seemed like Hyunsik was trying to stop a girl who was forcing her way in through the barricade. His stomach lurched at the sight of her familiar face.

As if he was acting purely on instinct, Johnny shot up from his seat and ran towards you. Hyunsik held up his arm to stop him from going any closer to you. You could've been a deranged fan, for all Hyunsik knows.

"Johnny-"

"I know her."

Hyunsik was startled at his response and started to profusely apologize to you. You looked nothing but smug and Johnny let out a breathy laugh that helped unravel the knots in his stomach. The boxer quietly motioned for him to take his leave and Hyunsik hesitantly did as told only after tapping his wrist as a sign that time was ticking.

You bowed at him apologetically, "I'm so sorry I'm late! There was this damn patient-"

"It's okay. You're here now." He cut you off, a cheesy smile on his face. You easily reciprocated it back.

"I just came down here to wish you good luck." You said with the usual confidence in your tone gone and now replaced with a sudden timidness and bashfulness. "Not like you need it or anything."

"Where are you sitting?" Johnny asked, noticing that you were struggling to keep your attention on his eyes. He peered down and realized that he didn't have a shirt on, he chuckled.

You pointed near the walls of the stadium and he strained his vision to see so far away. He pursed his lips and let out a noise of discontent. You said that it was the only seats available because you were so late.

"Why don't you sit here with them? They wouldn't mind." Johnny said, jutting his thumb over to his team who was furtively watching his interaction.

"Oh no, it's okay."

"I insist. I want you to see me win up close."

You blushed a deep shade of scarlet and Johnny grinned at his successful attempt at a flirt. Was it even a flirt or was it an ego stroke? Either way, it didn't matter because you were smiling at him. You were easing his nerves and you didn't even know.

"I got out of my shift early so I wouldn't be in the hospital later to stitch you up." You teased, softly prodding his shoulder blade.

Johnny playfully puffed out his chest, "I don't plan on getting too injured today, I wanna look cool in front of you."

"Whatever you say, Johnny."

"But I'm nervous. I'm actually really nervous today." Johnny mumbled as if he didn't want anyone else in on your conversation, gone all traces of his cockiness as his heart thudded erratically against his chest when he heard Hyunsik's call of the last minute until he has to go inside the ring.

You gingerly reached for his taped hands and gave it a gentle squeeze, "Just count back from a hundred like I always tell you to. You'll do fine."

"Wait for me after the match, okay?" And so you did.

Counting down the numbers, Johnny clambered inside the ring and the bell rang to signal the start of the match. Being in the medical field meant that you were against all forms of violence so you couldn't really watch the entirety of the match without feeling sick to your stomach. Johnny didn't care, he was just happy that you kept your promise and was cheering him on.

It was hectic and everything was happening all at once. It was loud and everybody was screaming. This wasn't your world, it was Johnny's and your heart fluttered at the thought that he was willing to let you in it.

Eventually, the match ended in Johnny's favor and the next thing you knew, you were being hoisted up in the air. You had the biggest smile on your face, similar to Johnny's who now had a shiny belt slung over his shoulder. All his hard work and all his trips to the hospital paid off.

"Congrats on your win!" You exclaimed, placing your palms on his chest to steady yourself.

"I wanted you to see me get the belt." He admittedly sheepishly, reaching out to hold your wrists in his bruised hands.

"Aren't you hurt in any way? We can drop by the hospital if you want." You asked, checking to see if he had any major injuries but true to his word, Johnny was inflicted little to no injuries during the match, exclude the few bruises on his jaw and a busted lip

"Actually, I'd rather we get some coffee instead." Johnny said, the small smile on his lips making you chuckle.

"I'm sorry, I don't date my patients." You smirked at Johnny's crestfallen expression, softly shoving his side to make it known that you were only joking.

Johnny pulled a face, releasing a breath he didn't realize he was holding once he realized your joke. He played along, "I think you can make me an exception, I don't usually invite people to my matches."

"So this is about getting even, huh?" You were teasing him and now your faces were merely inches apart but before Johnny could even think of leaning in, you spun around and grabbed his hand once more. "C'mon then, my treat!"

Johnny let out a laugh. A boxer and a doctor, who would've thought?

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missroserose · 3 years

Text

Fic Writer Question Meme!

Thanks for the tag, @venhedish—I love stuff like this! I'd apologize in advance for how long this is likely to be, but I suspect we share that tendency, haha.

How many works do you have on AO3?

20 total. I've been publishing there since late 2018, so about three years now. That sounds right for me—I'm way too perfectionist to ever be prolific.

What's your total AO3 word count?

125,744! Apparently it takes me three years to write a novel's worth of words I feel are worth publishing...which also sounds right.

How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

Three, primarily: The Lost Boys, Stranger Things, and Supernatural. Mostly Stranger Things, since I was pretty enmeshed in the Harringrove community for about a year and a half, though these days I'm hanging out more with the SPN crowd. We'll see if that translates to more fics.

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

1.) Sunflower (524) 2.) Quickly, look away (506) 3.) We'll Become Who We Meant To Be (383) 4.) Too Young To Fall In Love (333) 5.) When the Waters Start to Cross (283)

First, what's not surprising: all are Stranger Things/Harringrove works. I'm a little surprised to see that "Sunflower" had edged out "Quickly" as my most-kudosed story, for years it was the other way around—but maybe that's actually not that surprising—part of the reason I haven't been as active in the fandom is that I really love the darker and more complex renditions of Billy Hargrove's character (a la "Quickly") and since S3 aired it seems like the fashion has moved more towards more lighthearted fluff (a la "Sunflower"). Still, both are pretty undemanding smut, so it makes sense that they're on top; similarly, I'm not surprised to see "Too Young To Fall In Love" in the top five either.

I am a little surprised that "We'll Become Who We Meant To Be" is #3—it's honestly close to genfic, there's only the tiniest moment of hinted-at attraction in there. I'm not mad about it, I honestly feel like it's one of my better efforts; on the other hand, "Wake Me Up" was in a similar vein and it's close to the bottom. I guess there's just no telling what's going to catch on...in fairness, a 25K outsider POV novella is a much bigger ask than a 3K short story.

Honestly, I'm probably most surprised at "When the Waters Start to Cross" cracking the top five—it's a 52K+ WIP and a profoundly complex atmospheric existential horror/romance, which is, like, five strikes against it. I'm not mad about it, though—I love that fic, even if it is a huge time and energy suck, and it definitely contains some of my best writing.

Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

I do! Sometimes it takes me a while, but I genuinely appreciate people taking the time to leave feedback (even if it's just a string of emoji!). And every once in a while I'll get really thoughtful or incisive comments that spark whole conversations—that's one of the best reasons to write fic!

What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?

Hmm...to be honest, nothing immediately comes to mind; I love angst but tend to want it to serve a purpose, i.e. it gets a character closer to who they want to be. So most of my endings are at least hopeful. *checks list* It looks like probably my angstiest ending is also my first fic posted, "Blue Masquerade". Poor Michael.

Do you write crossovers? If so what is the craziest one you've written?

I don't currently write crossovers; I wouldn't rule it out, but frankly I haven't come across an idea that appeals to me. Waaaaaay back in the mists of time I had a Daria/Harry Potter crossover that I was actually pretty proud of, but I got about as far as getting them to Hogwarts and then kinda ran out of ideas, so I never posted it.

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Not that I can think of? I'm not big-time enough to get hate, haha. Worst I ever got was some rando asking for top or bottom tags, which I just ignored, and one person on "We'll Become" who was like "I don't like this pairing but you did a good job", which kinda had me like ??? thanks, I guess? I did get one comment on "Quickly, look away" from someone who felt like it was in a different headspace from the fic I wrote it as a sequel to, but that didn't strike me as hate, it's a perfectly fair observation.

Do you write smut? If so what kind?

So first off, yes, and second...I recently came across this great Garth Greenwell quote that really gets at what I'm trying to do when I write smut:

In America in 2019 we are inundated with images of bodies to an absolutely unprecedented degree—images of eroticized bodies, images of sexual bodies; the Internet makes all our fantasies visible, and it trains us in new fantasies. And yet it also seems to me that our culture suffers from a dearth of representations of embodiedness, by which I mean of bodies imbued with consciousness. I’m not at all antiporn, but sometimes pornography (maybe especially Internet pornography, with its arms race of extremity) seems to want to evacuate bodies of personhood, to present them as objects. I think literature is the best technology we have for representing consciousness, and so I think there’s a kind of intervention that literature can perform in representing sex explicitly: it can reclaim the sexual body as a site of consciousness.

"Embodied porn" is probably the best description I can come up with—I love writing sex precisely because it's such a charged form of communication (Greenwell's words again), because there are things a character can do and say in that context that they never would normally. Like, sex acts are great and all, but what really does it for me is what's going on in their head, what's the history that brought the character to this point, how're they handling the inherent vulnerability and intimacy of this incredibly risky but potentially rewarding moment. Kink (whether through roleplaying, props, costumes, or whatever) is really just another way of adding to that personal meaning, since without the characters' reactions any trappings are meaningless.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of!

Have you ever had a fic translated?

No, although I'd love to work with a translator someday (whether with fic or another context)—I'm fascinated by the inherent puzzles in translating between languages, especially with informal speech and its many idioms and cultural references.

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Not yet! I'd be open to the idea, but it definitely has to be with the right person...

What's your all time favorite ship?

Isn't that basically like asking a mom to choose her favorite kid? Seriously, I like different things about all of them...which one's getting the most attention depends entirely on mood and headspace and other effectively random variables.

What's a WIP that you want to finish but don't think you ever will?

I don't have any I've given up on entirely, yet. Even Waters, as beastly complicated as it is, I've been ruminating on and adding to and arranging in my head lately...

What are your writing strengths?

Atmosphere, character, dialogue. I've said it before, I'm a capital-R Romantic at heart: I love writing settings that reflect and reinforce a character's headspace—while also implying what said character might be missing in their viewpoint.

Something I've noticed—my husband worked for years as a penetration tester, which meant he would regularly have to talk his way past people on a moment's notice. So, unsurprisingly, we both notice people, but he tends to observe their presentation (clothing, accessories, especially ones that're markers of social class and group belonging that allow him to tailor his approach), whereas I notice what they say and how they say it—and, often, what they don't say.

What are your writing weaknesses?

I suddenly feel like I'm in a job interview, haha. Perfectionism is a big one—I have a tendency to feel hopeless and quit if something's taking too long, rather than persisting until I get it sorted, even though some of my best work is stuff where I persisted. Also, I'm big on emotional intensity—which isn't a bad thing, necessarily, but I sometimes read back over my stuff and I'm like "geez, Ambrosia, ease up a bit"...I could definitely use some comic relief in my writing sometimes, but I think I'm often too insecure to try it.

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

I don't have any in particular—I rarely do it myself, because I don't trust myself to do it properly. (Perfectionism again!)

What was the first fandom you wrote for?

Daria, way back in the day. My work is still up on FF.net...sometimes I wonder if anyone's ever going to dig it up and confront me with it, haha. (I doubt anyone will ever care that much...I guess I'm more just curious if my style from twenty years ago is recognizably me.)

What's your favorite fic you've written?

If we're talking about finished fics, probably either "Wake Me Up" or "Young At Heart"—they're both pretty oddball, but both required a fuckton of work and both came out pretty close to what I wanted. But "Waters" is my biggest baby...maybe I'll open up Act III to work on today...

Thanks again for the tag, Ven! I'm going to tag @ihni, @redmyeyes, @twobrokenwyngs, @skybound2, @sambrosia, @shewritesdirty, @introvertia, @coffeeandchemicals, and @anarchist-billy—if you're up for some rumination, I'd love to hear your thoughts on your writing!

#author stuff #my writing #fanfic culture #about me #tag games

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changkyunswifey · 3 years

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can I ask for 9 (fluff) + 6 (angst) + 39 (angst) with kyun please? if you're comfortable, can I ask for it to be like some soulmates!au? thank you so much in advance! ♡♡

#9 [f] : "Can you sing that song again for me ?"

#6 [a] : "I lost my soulmate"

#39 [a] : "Because I know when I open my eyes this will all turn out to be a dream and I'll lose you again"

pairing : changkyun x gn!reader

Soulmates!au -> The only person in the world you can hear sing is your soulmate.

a/n: it's my first time writing a soulmates!au and it gave me quite a hard time but I hope you like it!! it's a bit messy because I got mixed up with the tag and i only realized at the end because I'm dumb and it’s also way too long like i turned this into a whole fic help irhddfj BUT I hope it's to your liking! Thank you so much for your request love!! <3

You and Changkyun were sitting in his studio with him trying to play the piano to match your singing of improvised lyrics. Those little "song making" dates - as you two liked to call them - slowly became a habit after the both of you found out you were one another soulmates the first time you had heard Changkyun sing some random cartoon opening under the shower.

You loved his voice so much it felt like a blessing everyday to have him as your soulmate, little did you know, he felt the exact same way.

He always wondered if you were not some angel sent on earth for him to charm him with your heavenly voice.

Everyone said you two really made the perfect match, that you would stay soulmates forever, forever yeah, at least that's what they said, that's what they liked to believe.

As the tune of the piano slightly faded along the sound of your voice, Changkyun looked at you and looked at your face with pure adoration in his eyes, gosh you were even as pretty as an angel, how could his soulmate be so perfect ? He would often ask himself this, always scared to lose you to someone better for you, someone more worthy of your perfection.

"Can you sing that song for me again ?" he asked breaking the new borned silence, "I really want to record this if that's alright ?" he asked cautiously, afraid you would turn down his offer.

You offered him a sweet smile followed by a firm nod before gesturing to him to start recording. And he did as asked, pressing the record button on his phone before counting down to 1 and started playing the same melody again for you to sing along to.

After a few minutes, Changkyun stopped the recording as you were finally done with your song, "I'm going to cherish this forever" he said while comically holding his phone close to his heart, "Whenever I won't be able to hear your beautiful voice on live, I will still have this" he explained playfully putting his phone in your face, "You will have to record me a song from you someday too ! That would be unfair if you did not.." you breathed out, as if you were growing scared of not hearing him singing as much as you both will grow pretty busy the next few days, if not for the next few weeks.

"Of course I will love." he reassured you, kissing your cheek before looking at the time.

"Don't you have to go ?" he asked a bit sad that your date was so short today.

"I guess so yeah.." you replied after looking at the time on your phone.

Changkyun got up from his chair, taking your hands in yours to pull you up along with him before kissing your forehead, then your left cheek, going straight to the right one, then your nose and finally placing a lingering kiss on your lips as a silent goodbye, earning a slight chuckle from you.

"I'll see you later, okay?" you whispered against his lips as an unspoken promise to see him again soon. "Yeah, of course." he replied before placing one final kiss on your lips once again, this one shorter to avoid feeling too much pain from being apart from you for some time as he watches you wave at him before watching you disappear behind the door of his studio.

A few days had passed since your last encounter and Changkyun started to really miss your voice.

He was at the studio with his friends and he decided to play your song on his speakers since he was the only one who would be able to hear your voice, which he honestly thought was a shame for the whole world, but it made this moment even more special.

He plugged his phone to his speakers before laying back on his chair, ready to enjoy a musical break, before pressing the play button and closing his eyes.

But after a few seconds, nothing came out of the speakers. The only sound audible was his friends' laughter behind him. At first he thought he didn't plug the cable well so he checked it; everything was fine. Maybe the sound was off ? Not that either. He must have misclicked on the play button, right? It could only be this, couldn't it?

He unlocked his phone with shaky hands, his eyes widening, tears pooling within them, blurring his vision as he saw that the record had been playing for the past 2 minutes.

His knees could not hold him up anymore and he fell on the floor with a loud thud, turning the attention of his friends to his crying form as they rushed toward him to ask him what was wrong, they were so worried, it was not him, he would never cry in front of anyone, so what could have broken their friend ?

“I lost my soulmate.” he said in between sobs, "I can't hear her singing anymore, I can't - Why - What's happening ? Guys I don't -", he was crying so hard he could not talk properly, his heart felt like it had been shattered into millions of pieces while his friends were hugging him tightly, trying to comfort him and take the pain away as they could.

After some time he gently pushed them away and reached for his phone, going to your contact and pressing the call button, bringing the device to his ear, trying his best to stay calm and steady his shaky voice.

"Hey baby !" you said joyfully on the other side of the line.

"Can you sing for me please ?" he pleaded, holding in his sob biting his now dry lips.

"Kyun I'm in the middle of the streets ! I can't sing right now, plus you still have that recording, right?" you asked, almost yelling above the voices of the crowd around you.

He had to think fast and came up with the first lie he could so you would sing for him again : "I think I didn't save the file well, I can't find it. Please baby, just a few lyrics for me?" he was almost begging you for this and you could not deny him this.

"Give me a second" you said "I'm just going to find somewhere more calm okay ?" you reassured him, "Okay" he replied.

The line went silent for a minute, then two, then three, then four, five minutes later you spoke again : "Kyun ?" you asked worriedly, "Are you alone yet?" he asked impatiently.

"You - Did the line cut ? Didn't you hear me ?" as those words came out, he knew his suspicions were true, he knew he had lost you this time.

"I love you Y/N, never forget this, I will always do." he breathed out, not being able to hold in his tears anymore.

The sound of your lover's cries alerted you, "Love ? What's wrong ? Why are you being like this ? Why are you crying ? God Kyun tell me what's going on !" you asked in panic. "Why are you doing this ?" you asked again, almost yelling, tears starting to form behind your eyelids.

“Because I know when I open my eyes this will all turn out to be a dream and I’ll lose you again.”

#monsta x #monsta x imagines #monsta x scenarios #monsta x fluff #monsta x angst #monsta x changkyun #changkyun imagines #changkyun scenarios #changkyun x reader

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sl-walker · 3 years

Photo

All right, since I’m in the middle of a flare and have to work manual labor for the next four days despite it, I figured I would make myself -- and hopefully other people -- laugh by talking about one of my favorite OG Captain Marvel stories. Namely, from Whiz #50, with a cover date of January, 1944, meaning it was probably produced sometime in late 1943.

I want to share it because why not, this is some absurdly charming stuff.

I’ll get more into why it’s one of my favorites as we go, in the form of running commentary. So, full story (with said commentary) under the cut. If you wanna just read the story without my commentary, stick to the pictures. XD

First, let me say that the cover and splash page definitely live up to the story, though the cover’s a bit more sensationalized. But the premise is pretty damn simple: Our intrepid hero and his newsboy alter ego are on vacation. Cap decides to go swimming. It goes hilariously wrong and thus ensues a bit of a madcap adventure, no puns intended.

Second, the fact that Cap and Billy are depicted as essentially different entities makes what Billy does next the ultimate trolling:

Gee, airing out the stolen laundry on the radio? Really? I’ll leave it up to you, gentle reader, whether Billy actually was trolling his own alter-ego for ratings or whether he was just innocently sharing the story while his other-self winced quietly in whatever ether-space he exists in when not front-and-center.

Either way, I love it.

Continuing on...

I get a kick out of the fact that Billy’s monologue is that he’s no dare-devil. One, because that’s so obviously not true in any way -- (that kid is awesomely, sometimes recklessly brave on the regular even without Cap) -- but two, because the bridge is actually named Dare-Devil Bridge. We aren’t given any reason why this dangerous potential death-trap is there, hanging without so much as a gate or a warning sign or anything, because we don’t need one. It’s there specifically for what happens next.

Which, of course, is Billy calling in Captain Marvel, who does some light complaining about the situation Billy left him in. There’s no bite to it, which I find adorable -- Cap actually does get frustrated once or twice in other issues with Billy calling on him for mundane stuff, though he’s never mean about it -- but there is a bit of the sense of being put-upon there that’s just-- I dunno, cute. It’s something I miss a lot in the various post-crisis takes on the character: That duality, that difference in personality, and the way each of them responds to different situations. Often, they’re on the same page, but notably, sometimes, they aren’t.

Someday, I promise, I need to sit down and write how I think that works between those two without being a truly frightening mental illness manifested, what with them being the same person but not the same person. Because I have so many ideas, and I’ve only had since the early-2000s to percolate them. LOL! But until then, just enjoy this.

Here is another reason why I love the Golden Age Captain Marvel books and why I love this specific story: This is an absolutely normal, mundane thing to do. It’s the human thing to do. These aren’t the actions of some super-serious superdude. These are the actions of a pretty shockingly normal guy doing something mundane. And a whole story is built around that normalcy.

It’s cute. It’s funny. It��s the reader already knowing that he’s getting himself into a situation that he absolutely could have avoided, but also completely understanding how it happened anyway. It’s pretty brilliant writing: I say this as a pretty damned good writer myself.

So much of the reason why, I think, Cap was so endearing as a hero is that humanity. He’s got pretty much god-tier power in the Golden Age, once his powerset is established. He’s utterly invulnerable to all physical harm while powered up. But-- he’s human. He knows he’s human. He acts like it, and decides, “You know what? I’m going skinny-dipping.”

He and Billy are both characters it’s so easy to empathize with.

Also, a reminder that the art under Chief Artist C.C. Beck is really, really good. (He had a whole stable of artists to help produce this stuff!) Ignoring registration issues on the printing press, the actual line art is amazingly good; proportion and perspective and consistency.

But anyway--Cap does get to enjoy his swim. But, then, oh no.

I love the idea of a world where the prime hero -- and he definitely is in that world -- can take off his suit and go swimming, and where someone else is bold enough to steal the damn suit off of him. The first time I read this, I started laughing here. Not at him, but at the situation he’s found himself in. At the idea that some random passer-by saw Captain Marvel’s costume and went yoink!

Another thing I love about this particular story is how much Cap and Billy have to work together, just by necessity. Like-- it’s just really good. But anyway, thank everything Billy Batson is on the ball, coming to the rescue.

Sheer bad luck via the weather keeps this story rolling along in hilarious misdirections. Realistically, that uniform probably wouldn’t be all buttoned together (we see Cap take off pieces of it aside the pants in other issues, including socks!), but who cares? The point of the story is that giant bear rug on the floor’s gonna get put to use.

Man, when have you ever seen Superman creeping naked through some stranger’s house wearing nothing but a random polar bear because he went skinny dipping? No wonder these comics sold so well. This next panel is when I start wheezing, though, and pretty much keep wheezing.

“A lady, too! I’ve got to get away from here!”

I’m dying at this point. That’s such a characteristic response, and yet, I think that’s why it’s funny.

Anyway, because this is an excellent story (I mean this without an ounce of irony, too), our dynamic duo stumbles across a plot in play to rob the hotel they’re staying at.

Here’s a big part of why this is such a good tale: Everything fits. Even when it isn’t explained, like Dare-Devil Bridge, it still fits. Why is the tree down? Because there was just a thunder storm, the same one that blew Cap’s suit into the room with the gangsters.

I don’t know if this is Otto Binder’s story, but I wouldn’t be surprised in the least. It’s a complete story told in relatively few pages that accomplishes everything it’s meant to.

Anyway, using foliage as cover, Cap gets to be heroic----then Billy gets to get back to the business of trying to stop the robbery of the hotel and get his heroic alter-ego dressed again. Which leads to a rather adorable and funny scene of Billy not only trying to describe what Captain Marvel wears, but what size it would need to be tailored in.

(Cap is supposedly a 44 for a suit coat, we find in some earlier appearance, which would refer to his chest size. So, an XL for shirts and suit-coats. He’s a big guy, but he’s actually not a hulking huge guy. But more on that later.)

I love the fact Billy tries to like-- use himself as a model. Maybe in another ten years, kiddo. Billy’s actually pretty buff for like a 12-14 year old, he’s not a scrawny kid at this point, but yeah, no. LOL!

Another thing I also really, really love about this style, though, is that they draw Captain Marvel as being strong, as having a powerful build-- but not as a dehydrated body-builder with deep cuts. He’s got human proportions, regardless of his strength; he’s got a human build, not a superhuman one.

C.C. Beck had a lot of things to say about superheroes who were just muscles on top of muscles, all clearly defined, and he didn’t like it. As someone who first got into comics in the early 90s with Jim Lee’s X-Men--

I do get Beck’s point. I not only get it, but I really highly approve of it. He maintained to the end that he drew (and oversaw) the Marvel family to look like high school and college athletes, and I can see that. I think the one person who’s gotten it right in the modern era is Evan “Doc” Shaner, who did Convergence: Shazam! He not only nailed that strong-but-not-hulking build for Cap, but also how young he looked. College-age, in fact.

But anyway, enough digression into art and why I like this better than most modern takes on the character. Also, that’s just a cute set of panels.

I also like that there wasn’t an easy fix there. Cap’s still in his not-birthday suit, and Billy’s still stuck running around trying to solve the issues at hand. Next comes some other really good panels:

-snorts- He’s locked in. Yeah, that’ll hold him.

Anyway, what I really liked here was again that tandem working; Billy can’t punch through a wall, but Cap can. Cap can’t crawl out while he’s au natural -- well, he could, but he’d probably rather die first -- but Billy’s got no such issue. It’s just fun when you get to see them doing something like that. You have to really think for a minute about the trust each of them must have in their alter-ego.

ANYWAY, we get the rare treat then--

--of Captain Marvel not only yoinking a dude into a dark room, but then stealing his clothes. Except, not his underwear. Because that’s nasty. LOL!

I love that in this series, you do actually get to see him wear other stuff. Go incognito. Get his red suit messed up enough to take it to a dry cleaner’s, wherein he ends up dressed like a musketeer after. Jerry Ordway’s series is, I think, the only other time we see Cap not wearing his famous suit, but it happened enough in the Golden Age that it wasn’t a shock.

Like, I hate to be the one to say this, but I do think DC drops the ball often on just how much you can do with Captain Marvel (or Shazam, depending on timeline, but that’s the wizard’s name to me so mostly I’ll stick with the original name) if you unbend enough to. It’s not just the costume change, or the duality of him and Billy being the same but not, but also his inherent, essential humanity.

But I am digressing again, sorry. XD I just feel strongly enough about these versions of these characters to spend hours writing this.

Anyway, only a single panel later:

And that’s that! Billy Batson has just outed his own alter-ego’s most embarrassing moment to whomever’s listening to WHIZ radio -- thank everything podcasts and the internet weren’t available then, ha! -- and we get to see a recounting of a very fun story.

Like I said earlier, I love this one for its essential humanity. The hero got himself into this mess, he and Billy got him out of this mess, and stopping the criminals was actually just kind of a lucky stroke thrown in there. But even though Cap got himself into this, the story never treats him like he’s stupid. It never treats him like he��s some kind of idiot. You’re laughing, but-- not in a mean way.

I love how human it is. How complete it is. How genuinely funny it is. It’s a thousand times more funny when you genuinely love and respect Captain Marvel and Billy Batson, too.

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this dissertation on a skinny-dipping hero. LOL! I enjoyed sharing it with you.

#dc captain marvel #billy batson #shazam #whiz comics

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dr-ethan-ramseyy · 3 years

Text

I’ll Make This Feel Like Home

Pairing: Jonathan Hayes x reader

Warnings: none

Word Count: 1.5K

Summary: Jonathan takes you to Maine for Christmas, which makes you think quite a bit about the future.

A/N: I know it’s nowhere near Christmas, but that 💗 level up conversation got me thinking… Also I’ve been to Maine a few times and I absolutely love it there

✨ you can find part 2 here ✨

“I’ve always wanted to settle down back home… Honestly as far as homes go it’s pretty wonderful. And I’ve always pictured growing old with my partner in a house up there by the ocean. Lighting a fire in the woodstove during the winter...Putting on a Christmas record so we can slow dance to it...I’ve been including you in those plans lately.” ~Jonathan Hayes

Jonathan was thrilled when I had agreed to go to Maine with him for the holidays. And really, how could I say no? I had met his parents once before, pretty quickly after he had gotten back from his deployment. We couldn’t get enough of each other then, he was by my side practically every moment of the day. After we had spent a few straight days in his bed, he somewhat sheepishly asked if I still wanted to meet his parents, and of course I couldn’t wait to go see where the man I loved grew up.

We decided to make a road trip of it, loading up on snacks and singing along to the radio with the windows down, his fingers intertwined with mine between the seats. We had arrived at his parents’ house fairly late at night, and they were thrilled to see us, just the same. His mother launched herself at him, standing up on her tiptoes to kiss his cheek. She beamed up at him and he smiled right back before glancing back at me, a slight blush on his cheeks. It was like I could feel the love radiating off of them, and I suddenly understood why Jonathan’s family meant so much to him.

She turned to me then, as Jonathan’s father gave him a solid handshake, looking at him with all the pride in the world.

“You must be Y/N!” she smiled, pulling me in for a hug. “He’s told us so much about you, dear, we’re so happy you could join us for the weekend!”

“Thank you so much for having me!” I said.

His father greeted me politely and they ushered us inside, Jonathan carrying our bags, his hand on the small of my back.

We settled into the living room, Jonathan sitting next to me on the couch, his arm draped around my shoulders, while he caught up a bit with his parents. All three of them kept bringing me into the conversation, never letting me be left out for even a moment.

The rest of the weekend went on pretty much like that. I got a tour of the house and their town, and it was all just as Jonathan said it would be: absolutely wonderful. His parents told stories from his childhood, and Jonathan would pull me closer and blush. He would tell stories about me, and I would blush and roll my eyes before he laughed and kissed my temple. It went perfectly.

I told him that. I told him that his parents are incredible and Maine is incredible and I couldn’t wait to meet his brothers. I told him that I had such a good time, a better time than I had even hoped for. I told him that it meant the world to me that he showed me this world of his. We went back home, he met my family and friends, and things kept going as perfect as could be.

There was one thing I didn’t tell him. I didn’t tell him because it scared me, even though I knew it shouldn’t. I didn’t tell him that as soon as I felt that ocean breeze on my skin, I wanted to stay. I didn’t tell him that when we were walking on the coast hand in hand, I couldn’t help thinking that I wanted to do that forever. I wanted to be anywhere with him, of course, but I was shocked to find that I fell in love with Maine almost as much as I had fallen in love with Jonathan.

It wasn’t Maine itself, obviously. None of the things I loved so much about being there would matter at all if it weren’t for him. But I started to picture it, living out there, settling down by the ocean with Jonathan. I wanted it. I wanted to stay there with him. He had mentioned it a few times, that he wanted to settle down up there. But, he had never said seriously, not like he was thinking about it anytime soon. So, I never brought it up.

Now here we are, Christmas Eve, snuggled up in Christmas pajamas his mother had gotten us, next to a fire Jonathan had built up in the fireplace after his parents had gone to bed. It was just the two of us now, his brothers had left a few hours before. Of course, they were every bit as welcoming as his parents had been, and they reminded me of Jonathan in so many ways, it was comical.

“They love you, you know,” Jonathan murmured in my ear, pulling me just a little closer into his chest.

“Who?”

“Well, my parents, obviously. But my brothers told me right before they left. You’re officially part of the family, baby.” I could hear the smile in his voice.

“I’m so honored,” I said, looking up at him with a smile. “Your home is amazing.”

“You’re my home, sweetheart,” he said before pulling me in for a gentle kiss. “But yeah, it’s pretty great here, too.”

I laughed. “You’re such a sweet talker.”

“I mean it!”

“I know,” I said, quieter now, looking into his eyes. “You’re my home, too.”

He smiled that brilliant smile that made my knees weak, and suddenly shifted me off of him so that he could get up and walked to the record player on the other side of the room.

He played a slow Christmas instrumental then sauntered up to me, holding his hand out, palm up.

“May I have this dance?”

“Of course,” I giggled, setting my hand in his.

He pulled me close, gazing down at me while his arm wrapped around my waist. I put my hand up on his shoulder as he swayed us, slowly spinning around the room.

Once a new song started, he pulled me even closer, leaning down to rest his forehead against mine. “You’re so beautiful, sweetheart.”

“We’ve been dating almost a year and you still make me blush.”

“I love making you blush,” he murmured before closing the distance between us in a slow kiss.

“I love you,” he said between kisses, bringing his hands up and cupping my cheeks.

“I love you, too,” I whispered back when I got air back in my lungs.

Suddenly, and to my horror, I felt tears on my cheeks. I was crying.

Jonathan’s demeanor changed instantly, concern flooding his eyes. “Are you okay? Did I do something?”

I shook my head, frantically wiping the tears away. “No, I’m fine, I’m sorry, I don’t even know why I’m crying.”

He bent down a little to look into my eyes, unconvinced. “Are you sure? Did something happen today?”

“No, no, everyone is so great, I…” I trailed off. He would definitely think I was insane.

He took my hand, gently leading me back to where we had been sitting before. He sat facing me, his hand placed comfortingly on my knee.

“You’re worrying me, Y.N. Whatever it is, you can tell me, you know that,” Jonathan said gently.

“It’s just…” I looked around the room, trying to find the right words. My eyes landed on several family photos that were hanging on the wall.

He followed my gaze to them, then looked back at me quizzically, waiting for me to continue.

“I love it here,” I said finally. “The ocean, the town, the snow. I really love it here.”

His eyes lit up for a moment. “You do?”

I nodded. Seeing him happy made the edges of my mouth quirk up.

His eyebrows knitted together in confusion. “I’m really glad to hear that but… why were you crying?”

“I don’t know. Ever since the first time we were up here, I could picture it. Us, growing old together up here by the ocean. Dancing to Christmas records… It just made me emotional, I guess. I just really love you,” I said, looking down at my hands, feeling self-conscious.

Jonathan put a finger under my chin, gently tilting my face up to look at him. He was smiling at me with so much affection in his eyes, if I wasn’t sitting down already, I probably would’ve fallen over. “I really love you, too. I didn’t know you thought about stuff like that,” he said quietly.

I lifted my shoulder up in a shrug. “How could I not?”

“You really want to live up here someday? With me?”

“I really do.”

He grinned and pulled me into his lap, wrapping his arms tightly around my waist and kissing me. “I’m so happy. Let’s start looking at houses now,” he said, trailing his lips down to my neck.

I burst out laughing. “Now?”

“Okay, maybe in the morning,” he conceded, capturing my lips again.

“Tomorrow is Christmas,” I said against his lips, teasing him.

He groaned, pulling back just enough to glare at me. “Fine. But we’re looking. Soon.”

“Soon,” I agreed, pulling him back into a kiss.

#lovelink #lovelink jonathan #lovelink fanfic #lovelink fanfiction #jonathan hayes #jonathan hayes x reader #jonathan hayes x mc #jonathan hayes fanfic #jonathan hayes fanfiction #lovelink albert #albert bishop #fanfic #my writing

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sasa-gay-yo · 3 years

Text

Just Us (Chapter Eighteen: Silver)

←Chapter Seventeen

Early 849

“Elias, can you take this order to Mrs. Los? Do you know where that is?” The boy looked up at me from the coffee beans he was grinding and nodded, taking the bag I handed him.

“Can you also pick up some milk on the way? Try to get the one at the bottom of the icebox, yeah?”

“Sure thing, Miss. Eva. What time do you want me back?” I looked up at the clock on the wall, noting that it was almost closing time. By the time he’d be back, I would be cleaning up already.

“Actually, the milk can wait. Bring it when you come to work tomorrow morning. After you drop off the box to Mrs. Los you can go home.” His face lit up, knowing that I wouldn’t keep him to clean the floors today. With that, he took the money out of my hand and turned to wave with his left hand, just like Jonas, and walk out of the door. I rested my elbows on the front counter, looking around at the few people left in the café. I didn’t feel like cleaning, so I just finished grinding the coffee beans Elias left, waiting for the two tables to leave.

Elias had started helping me at the café every day since he turned thirteen, the legal age of work, since his father had given up a career in hopes of revitalizing society through the Order of the Walls. Now being older, Elias was getting fed up with the way his parents started treating June and him, saying it was better to starve than forcibly take food from what the Walls supplied. At one point, the boy had stayed at my house the whole week, not wanting to go back home to face the men his father brought over who tried relentlessly to convert him. June was able to shield herself from this by always staying late in the bookshop taking on restoration projects that made her work for hours on end. She would always come into the café tired, needing a cup of coffee, but saying how it was worth it since she didn’t have to go home. At some point, Jonas, Ben, and I had talked about what we might do to help them. They could only stay over at our houses for so long until their parents would get too strict. This meeting we had was prompted by their father wanting to marry off June to someone’s son next summer. If he married her, especially to someone in the strict Order, she would have to quit her job and would not be able to take over the bookstore for herself. She cried to me that night too, Levi sitting in the corner watching her, only to let her sleep with me while he took the couch. When I told Levi about their situation, he could only get angry for their plight but could give no solution. No one knew what the solution was. All I could do was try my best and shield them from home life. However, I did plan to argue for June if her father pushed marriage next summer.

Speaking of Levi, he was supposed to come over tonight and stay. They had just returned from a rather interesting expedition, and he sent a letter saying that Hange was keeping him locked down for her experiments before he could come. The day after tomorrow, he had to return to, again, plan the next expedition around Hange’s "master plan". The only detail I was allowed to know was the fact that it had to do with capturing a titan. I would have to ask him about that crazy want and how they were going to get a titan through Trost and back to HQ. Hopefully, he brought some of Erwin’s orders too. While most of the Scouts didn’t know about my existence, to keep business going, they ordered from me regularly. Whether it be basic supplies or bread, it came through me first, and then it went to Reeve’s if I couldn’t fulfill. Erwin and Levi were also trying to convince me that with the worsening of the famine, I should just come and work as a cook or stock worker for the Scouts, but I refused. If I left, Elias wouldn’t have money to support his family.

“Have a goodnight, now, Eva!” I waved to the customer who finally left, leaving their stray newspaper on the table, and decided that even if there were ten minutes left before official close, I would start now. As I turned around to get a broom, the knob of the locked door turned and then turned again before opening. Only two people had a key. With a smile on my face and one hand on my hip, I turned to face him.

“This could be breaking and entering. I’m clo…” Turning to the door, hoping to see Levi, I saw four people standing outside the door looking in. They were all wearing Scout uniforms, and I thought at first Erwin could have sent them to pick up the order, but my raven-headed boy pushed through them, grabbing the key from the older-looking man’s hands. The others seemed like they were lost, not knowing what they were doing here in the first place. Their eyes were heavy too like they had no idea why I was here either. Why had their captain taken them here? I also had the same question.

“I brought them here at this time on purpose. Do you have enough tea?” Levi seemed to be the only one calm as he stepped into the café, walking to a round table in the center that would hold all of us. So he had brought them here… but who were they? It’s not like I knew any Scouts by name, and none of them seemed to be officers. We just stared at each other and Levi clicked his tongue, leaning back in a chair in his usual fashion.

“U-uh, um, come in. Please.” I put the broom down, gesturing with both hands to have them sit down, and they all waited to see if Levi was going to protest before they stepped in. With the amount of Scouts gathering after hours, I made sure to lock the door and pull all the front shades down so no one from Mitras could think wrong of the situation. Well, I didn’t know what this situation even was, so they could be entirely accurate. Either way, seeing the normal, annoyed look on Levi’s face as he told the four to calm down made me a bit more at ease, walking to the counter to make six cups of tea.

“Eva?” I looked up at Levi’s call and he had a finger pointing at the red-haired woman next to him, “Petra said she would prefer water, but she was too afraid to ask you herself.” The woman’s face flushed bright red to match her hair, and she held both of her hands up.

“I-I… I’m not afraid! No! I just didn’t… didn’t want to bother you!” I gave her a soft smile and nodded before turning to get her some ice. They still were silent and I could feel Levi’s annoyance grow when looking over all of them. They had their hands in their laps or eyes looking anywhere but Levi and I. Petra. Petra. Where had I heard that name before? Levi and Hange both mentioned her. What were the other’s names? Maybe if I knew theirs’ it would spark a memory.

“Does anyone want honey?” I asked, hoping you could get information out of them that way, but they were still all too nervous to answer. None of them could look me in my eyes either and I realized that Levi had probably told them some scary rules before coming here. I sighed.

“I’ll just bring the whole bottle, yes?” I poured the correct amount of honey into Levi’s cup and put them on two trays, walking over. Levi had an empty chair next to him, one hand already resting over the top, and he pointed down indicating that’s where I was going to sit. When I passed out the cups of tea, they mumbled thank you under their breaths, still not looking up at me. It was almost comical now how afraid they seemed to be of Levi’s wrath if they did something wrong. I was now entirely too curious to see what he'd said and I was going to tease him for it to at least lighten up the mood.

“Geez, Levi. Did you tell them I bite or something? Don’t worry, I’m not as scary as he is.” This didn’t help to lighten the mood at all, and they looked even more nervous now that I’d just insulted their Capitan right in front of his face. I’d have to remind Levi once again to stop being so mean to the cadets. Every time I would come to HQ, I would watch him outside Erwin or Hange’s window and frown at the punishments he so easily dished out. One time, I even caught his eye and shook my head, causing him to glare and make a cadet get up from doing the hundred push-ups he’s punished them with.

Levi cleared his throat before sitting forward to address them.

“This is my Special Operations Squad,” He went around the table, “Petra Ral, Oluo Bozado, Eld Jinn, and Gunther Schultz.” They all bowed in their chairs, none of them daring to touch their cup of tea before Levi did. Were they being cautious of him or cautious of the drink I’d given them? Also, did they know who I was? My memory had sparked, remembering Levi talked about Eld, making him a second in command for this new squad. They’d formed a few months previous if what Hange told me was correct. Levi had told me the final lineup so I could confirm that he made the correct choices, even though I knew nothing about titan killing. He’d do that a lot more, asking me my opinion on a Scout matter, just so I could confirm his thinking was correct. One time I disagreed with him and he pouted all day.

“I’ve heard of all you. The amount of titans you’ve all killed is very impressive.” Again, a chorus of nervous thank-yous came and Levi glared at their apprehensiveness.

“This is my wife, Evlynn. She owns this café.” I had to swallow hard at whatever emotion came up in my throat as he introduced me as his wife. There had to be some form of reasoning for this, but it made my heart jump again. It had been almost two years since he’d made the promise to marry me someday, and he had yet to act on it. A girl couldn’t be that patient. I could see their eyes almost bug out of their heads as he introduced me as his wife too. So, they didn’t know who I was. Their faces all showed an intense form of disbelief at his words. They could tell just by us sitting next to each other the difference in personality. I was upright and smiling at all of them, making fun of their Captain, and Levi was glaring down at them, his voice being nonchalant about this situation. He almost sounded bored and annoyed he had to introduce me in the first place.

“Y-You’re married?” The older man let out, making Levi roll his eyes.

“Not yet. Soon. Why are you all so surprised? Wipe those looks off your faces.” This made me snicker, putting a hand over my mouth as not to ruin the “Captain” hold he had over them. Suddenly, this meeting was going to turn into a fun one on my accord.

“Don’t be so mean to them, Lev!" You hit him in the shoulder, "They’re going to let you die on the field if you act like this. Please, introduce yourselves to me! One by one!” Again, they seemed disturbed by Levi and I’s juxtaposition, and even Levi turned his head, trying not to glare at me. It was obvious to him what I was doing.

“Eld Jinn. Second-in-command. Wall Rose. Ma’am.” The others gave Eld a weary look at his short introduction, finally looking into my eyes, but when Levi didn’t say anything, they continued.

“I’m Gunther Schultz, Ma’am. My birthday is July 30th and I am from a small village inside Wall Rose.” This felt weird to me now. They were talking to me with the same prestige as they give Levi, which makes sense, but it was uncomfortable to me. I was probably the same age as all of them and I’m not in the Survey Corps.

“You can all just call me Eva. I’m not a soldier, I’m a café owner.” Again, all of their gazes went to Levi to see if he would give them this permission. I frowned and glared at Levi. If he wasn’t such a harsh leader, then they wouldn’t be scared of me. I should be happy he’s letting more people know about me, but now it was just making me more annoyed at his treatment of people.

“In this café, I rank above Captain here. Call me Eva. Oluo,” I pointed to him and he looked at me now, giving the same look Levi’s face would express, “Introduce yourself.” I felt Levi shift next to me, but it was just to reach over and drink his tea.

“Uh… I’m Oluo Bozado. Like Captain Levi said.” I frowned again, crossing my arms. All their introductions were the same.

“Any fun fact? How many titans have you killed?” I could see a smirk flit across his face. Ah, now I’ve hit the jackpot.

“I’ve killed almost thirty titans on my own. Six within my team here.” I turned to Levi, and he side-eyed me.

“Is that a lot?” I whispered, putting my hand to block my mouth, knowing for a fact that everyone could hear me. Levi smirked into his tea, hiding it with the cup, before going back to his normal face. He shrugged.

“I have at least double.” The other three had to hide their laughs as Oluo’s jaw clenched. He so badly wanted to yell at Levi, but he knew that if he did, he’d be punished somehow when they got back to HQ. I may rank higher than Levi here, but as soon as they walk out the door, they’re at his mercy. I just raised my thumb at him.

“Well, work hard.” I knew my smile cut into his ego, and he sat back in his chair, moping. I turned to Petra, remembering her last name as some family who lived in Trost. I pointed at her and she almost jumped out of her chair.

“You’re from Trost.” She quickly stood up and bowed, the chair almost sliding back to hit the table behind us.

“Hello, Eva! Ma’am! I’m Petra Ral! My family is from Trost District! I’m a team player and am devoted to our Captain!” It was the others' turn to laugh at her, but this time they didn’t hide their snickers. She sat down slowly and Levi and I exchanged a glance. His glance basically said ‘She’s usually not like this'. I smiled again and just nodded.

“I’m glad you’re devoted to such a meanie.” Levi gripped my thigh, which he placed his hand on under the table to try and control my language, but it didn’t work.

“I can introduce myself then. I’m Evlynn Flynn, but you can call me Eva. I was adopted from the Underground when I was twelve, but I didn’t know Levi back then. My caretaker owned this café before he died, and then he transferred it to me. Levi and I met almost… Oh, has it been almost 5 years already? We met right after he got promoted to Captain.” I saw the way they squirmed under Levi’s gaze. They had questions they wanted to ask, but they couldn’t while he was there. I’d have to fix that.

“Lev, can you go upstairs and get me a jacket? I’m getting cold.” He raised an eyebrow.

“It’s the middle of sp-” I kicked him under the table and his glare increased, but he knew what I wanted him to do. With a groan and a big motion of his chair, he exited through the storage room door. As soon as the wood door stopped moving forward, Oluo jumped forward in his chair.

“How did you marry him?” It was a harsh whisper, but the difference in personality made me laugh.

“We aren’t married yet. I still have a few months to decide if I hate him or not.” That didn’t make him laugh and he still gave me a confused look. Confused that I was with Levi in the first place.

“Is he as mean with you as he is with us?” Petra cut him off.

“Captain Levi isn’t mean! He just expects a lot from us, Oluo.” He rolled his eyes at her.

“You assisted us in three kills this last expedition and he goes,” Oluo dropped his eyebrow and squinted his eyes imitating Levi, “Petra. You should have gotten your own kills.” I had to give it to him, the impression was spot on and when I laughed, they all looked at me in silence. Perhaps the rest of them thought Oluo should’ve been more careful speaking in front of me, but my laugh scared them.

“No, no. That sounds like him. I can just talk back to him where you all can’t.”

“I can’t imagine anyone talking back to Captain Levi,” Gunther said and Eld nodded in agreement, taking a sip. He didn’t talk much. That’s probably why Levi chose him for second-in-command.

“There are so many things I could tell you, but I’m sure Levi wouldn’t appreciate it,” I leaned in to whisper to them and all four of them followed, “like how he likes his back rubbed before he goes to bed.” Just then, the stockroom door slammed open, hitting the wall next to it, and there Levi was with a sweater in hand. By how tight he was gripping it, I knew he’d been standing by the door listening for a few minutes, probably hearing everything Oluo said. Oluo had to know it too by Levi’s very specifically placed glare.

“Thank you, Lev.” I could feel his annoyance at that too, me calling his nickname in front of his subordinates. This was a fun little game I knew I was going to get punished for later, but it was worth it. Levi cleared his throat to get everyones’ attention.

“I brought you all here today because there should be no secrets between our group if we are to maximize teamwork. Moreover, like I would try to protect your family members, which I’ve met, you are expected to also protect mine. No one is to know of Eva outside of you four and various other Scouts. If I find out a rumor has leaked, I won’t hesitate to come to you four.” He, again, glared right at Oluo. I guess he's the troublemaker of the group.

“If you need a place to hide, you all can come here. I’ll lock him out.” Another harsh squeeze to my thigh. Another kick to the leg.

“Alright, you four may leave. Report to Hange Squad tomorrow for training.” They all stood up in an instant when Levi’s Captain voice turned on and affirmed him with a quick yes, Captain Levi! Before gathering to exit. While Levi stayed seated, I stood up and ushered them out, only to notice Petra and Oluo staring at the pastries leftover in the glass case. They probably thought they would be getting some and staying longer than this ten-minute conversation we had. Levi just wanted to get them out before I could say anything too embarrassing.

“Would you like something to take with?” Petra was the first to wave her hands.

“No, no. It’s fine, I was-”

“Peach or apple? It might be the last fresh fruit I get.” One last time, she looked to Levi, who had his back turned to them drinking his tea, and then she nodded slowly.

“Peach.” When I got back over to her, the three remaining pastries in the box, she was fumbling with some money notes and I shoved the box in her hands.

“You don’t have to pay. It’s for visiting.” Her eyes widened again.

“I can’t take this! I have to-” I pushed the box harder into her hands, asserting that I wasn’t going to take no for an answer.

“Pay me back by keeping Levi safe.” She stood there and stared at me for a few seconds, her eyes twinkling, before bowing sharply. It made me jump with the force she put into it, bending a full ninety degrees.

“Yes, Ma’am!” Behind me, Levi showed the signs of wanting to laugh. His shoulders tensed up and I heard one distinct cough. The others behind her were halfway there too. I just smiled and grabbed her to stand up, waving them off as they got on their horses. Once I got back inside, Levi had let his laugh go.

“You’re so mean to them. Did you see how tense they were?” He took another sip and I sat back down, turning my chair so I could face him.

“I’m not mean, I’m assertive. If I’m their Captain, I have to be strict with them.” I rolled my eyes at him and he mimicked me.

“How old is Petra? They all seem young except Oluo.” Levi looked up at the ceiling to try and think about their ages and then shrugged.

“I think Petra is twenty. She came to the Scouts the most recent out of all of them. The rest of them, I think, came a year after I did. I don’t pay attention.”

“They’re your team and you know nothing about them?” He scoffed and put the empty teacup down. I replaced it with my own, knowing I wasn’t going to finish. He promptly picked it back up and took a sip.

“I know their combat and field abilities inside and out. I don’t need to know their birthdays.” I narrowed my eyes at him and smirked, poking his stomach. He swatted at my hand.

“I bet you know all of their birthdays, you just don’t want to seem soft.” I tried to poke him again but this time he grabbed my hand so I couldn’t.

“You’re one to talk. You didn’t know my birthday until last year. Five years you said?” I gasped, putting a hand over my heart.

“That’s because you refused to tell me! You didn’t give me a gift until this year!” He huffed and grabbed my hand to pull me up onto his lap. This was a sign that he wanted to talk about something semi-serious.

“What if I marry you for your birthday gift next year?” My eyes narrowed in doubt.

“Is this one of the things you say you’re going to do and then end up not doing?” He almost choked on his tea.

“When have I done that? Do you want to get married or not?!” I put my hand on my chin like I was thinking deeply about this. It made me think of the other’s reactions when they found out that we were in fact planning to marry. Well, he did introduce me as his wife.

“You have to propose to me correctly.” He lifted his head and groaned before pushing me off of him and starting to get on the floor.

“We’ve had this conversation. Here I-” I held my hand up, looking at him down on one knee like I told him it worked. Frankly, it was a dreamy sight, him in his uniform on bended knee in front of me. However, one thing was missing. Maybe two.

“Ring?” I held out my palm and he left out one big breath before standing back up.

“You know, I’ve actually looked into it. Why the fuck do you look surprised? Yes. I did, I looked into buying a ring, and guess what? There’s no ring maker in Trost. Not one. That means I have to go all the way to the capital for your request.” I puffed up my cheeks at him, trying to imitate his pout.

“And is that going to take Humanity’s Strongest another year?” He gained composure and grabbed the teacup again, brushing off his pant legs.

“If you act like this, it’ll take two.”

“I want to get married before I’m thirty.”

“I’ll do you one better and get married to you on the day you turn thirty.” I glared at him and stood up to collect the teacups on the table that were barely half drunk. I was going to have to fight this man tooth and nail even though he was the one who said yes.

“You’re turning thirty-two this year, old man. You’re the one who has to rush.” His eyebrow lifted as he got up too to join me by the sink and watch me clean his comrade's dishes. Like he usually does, he just leans on me and puts his arms on either side, hands resting on the edge of the sink. Hands that could help me clean these extra dishes too.

“If I recall, you’re the one who told me to live in the moment. Why rush?” I pointed at the pile of dishes in the rack.

“You can live in the moment by helping me clean those. Or would you rather mop the floor?” He pushed himself off the sink, rolling his sleeves up to get ready to rinse off the plates and bowls leftover from customers. We just stood there like that, going through our method of rinse to dry, and letting the sun fade behind us. I stole some glances at him, but he was too busy focusing on cleaning the plates that he didn’t notice. I sighed in content and wished he could have stayed another day before he was swept up into meetings.

“Can I come with you tomorrow to the HQ? We can use Erwin’s orders as an excuse and take my cart?” He just hummed and nodded, finished with the last plate, handing it to me, and turning to lean on the sink like always. It was odd to see the sunshine in Levi’s eyes, reflecting in the silver like a mirror. I didn’t have to turn around to see the sunset, I could just look into his eyes. Moments like this, regardless if it was an hour after he was rude to his team, reminded me just how much warmth he had inside of him. Even now, he was humming, waiting for me to finish. If only I could show Oluo this Levi, then he would understand why’d I want to marry a man like him.

“Stop staring at me.” I smiled up at him.

“No.” He clicked his tongue, turning his head to hide the blush I knew was coming to his cheeks. I turned back to finish the last few dishes in the comfortable silence that was created, and Levi just stood there looking out at the only open window again.

“Did you really have to tell them that you rub my back?” I put the last plate back in the cabinet, laughing.

“What? Humanity’s Strongest doesn’t deserve back rubs?” Turning to face him, I put my hands around his neck and his hands instinctively rested loosely around my waist. He brought one hand up to push a piece of hair that fell out of my bun, back.

“He does, but not everyone deserves to know that I get them. Like you. Not everyone deserves to get to know you.”

“Oh, and you do?” We started rocking back and forth to some music playing in both of ours heads. Maybe to the song that he always hummed. Swaying left and right.

“It’s reparations for the amount of mental trauma you bestow upon me by trying to out me to my comrades.” I paused in the middle, scoffing and letting go of him. He laughed once as I turned away from him, taking off my apron.

“This was supposed to be a cute moment and you ruined it. You mop the floor.”

The next day, early in the morning, we traveled back to the HQ, some of Erwin’s orders in hand. It was nice watching the sunrise, both Levi and I in the front bench of the cart, but over that time, I fell asleep again, resting on his shoulder. Only when he moved me off of him, making me wake up, did I know we were near HQ. That way, if anyone was awake, an hour before training, they wouldn’t suspect much but a supply run. Levi would hop off, I would wave him out, and then turn to the Quartermaster stockroom. This was the only person, besides the officers, who I would react with regularly. The only thing was, unlike the officers, the man didn’t know of Levi and me. Today, he wasn’t there either, so I left a note and put the supplies up. Next, was giving Erwin the pastries.

Being trusted to walk through the Scout HQ alone was something I earned only a few months ago, by Levi’s standard. Still, the only places I walked to were his office, Erwin’s office, or Hange’s office. I would encounter some cadets, and they would bow, believing Erwin’s lie. It actually wasn’t a lie, I was making them bread and pastries, but they all thought I was related to Erwin. He said it was a way for cadets to understand why I would be in the officer’s quarters when other chefs or outside suppliers weren’t allowed. This means I had to be seen talking to Erwin every time I visited, which was starting to be a lot. I didn't mind though, it was nice to talk to him, and you two were creating a friendship slowly.

“You know, if only I actually looked like you then some cadets wouldn’t question this sibling lie.” I sipped the tea he gave me, making sure if the cadets looked up to Erwin’s window, they would see us standing.

“Your hair color is the same as my father's and no one knows that my mother also had blue eyes. If they ask you, just say you look like my mother.” I turned, leaning on the glass and looking up at him.

“And when they find out?” He put his coffee down, looking out the window again at the new cadets having sparring practice that Levi watched over.

“Well, if they find out about your relationship first, it will help us because the new cadets think the officers have a sort of harem. If they find out we aren’t siblings, which will be a bit hard with their limited resources, it is an easy cover-up.” I laughed, covering it with my hand, and glanced over at Levi who was conveniently looking up at us. He couldn’t act out anything or even look at us too long, but I could read his look. He was hungry and annoyed at the number of kids they didn’t receive after the 103rd Cadets were disbanded.

“A harem? Who’s involved?” He set his coffee down and decided it was time to get back to paperwork, leaving me alone at the window.

“Most of the time it’s a combination of myself, Captain Levi, maybe Squad Leader Hange, and some other officer.” I laughed out loud this time, still leaving my gaze on the field below.

“I better watch out or you might steal him from me, Erwin.” He chuckled too, shaking his head. I went away from the window, choosing to sit in a chair across from him. I was told to stay in here until Hange came and got me so nothing else would be suspicious.

“I don’t think anyone is stealing Captain Levi from you, Eva. If you can get him to marry you willingly, I don’t think he’ll ever leave you.” I rolled my eyes and looked down at the papers he was working at. Hm. Why does the Commander seemingly have fewer papers than a Captain?

“Well, we aren’t married yet. You have probably a few years to take him away if you wanted. I recommend not doing that, however. His paperwork already takes him away from me.” I glared at the stack of papers and he knew then what I was talking about, yet he decided not to comment. Instead, he steered the conversation over that bump effortlessly.

“I shouldn’t tell you this, but Captain Levi has asked me a few times about marriage… as if I would know anything about it, but I’ve given advice. I believe him to be apprehensive because he’s never been around someone married. Only a few officers in the Scouts are.” I put down my empty cup, pulling my legs up in the chair.

“Oh, I know. He goes to Hange about “women” things too, but she’s not afraid to tell me all about it. I’m sure she’ll tell me more today. I’m glad you’re helping him though.”

“I’d rather Levi leave certain things out when he talks to me, but I’m happy to help, Eva. Did you two ever figure out the bondage situ-?” My face went completely red.

“- I’m going to kill him.” Erwin smiled.

“Please don’t. We need Captain Levi alive.” I glared at his playfulness. Over the past year or so, getting closer to Erwin, I see exactly what Levi means when he talks about him. A hidden devil.

“Eva!” The door slammed open announcing Hange’s arrival after her squad had complete training. Moblit was trailing behind her too, “You will not believe what I have to tell you today!”

“I will see you sometime later, Eva.” I stood up, giving a playful glare at Erwin, before walking out with Hange’s arm wrapped in mine.

“Hi Moblit,” I said to the boy and he just nodded, walking behind us. I guess he wasn’t that much younger, me being older than Hange as well.

“So, I heard you met Levi Squad. How was it? How was it?”

“I barely got to talk to them. It was a five-minute conversation and then he kicked them out.” She turned around, looking at Moblit before we headed into her office.

“You’re excused, Moblit!” I turned to wave to him, but she shoved me into her office. She turned around, slamming her back on the door, a wicked smile on her face. I would’ve been scared if I didn’t know this was regular Hange behavior. Whenever Levi let her in on a single thing about us, she would corner me to make me elaborate on a single word or sentence of his. Personally, I thought Hange was trying to live vicariously through us, even when Moblit was at her beck and call, but it didn’t bother me much. Levi said he talked to her about it once, but she was the only one who could get away with not listening to him.

“I have been asked for advice, but I think you better just tell me so it turns out well in the end.” I raised an eyebrow and hopped up to sit on her table. This time, there was a new notebook and a lot more drawings of titans. This notebook looked worn and had a brown cover, unlike Hange’s usual green leather ones. I had the urge to open it while she was debating inside her head how to start this conversation.

“Is this one thing I can’t tell Levi you’ve talked to me about?” She snapped her finger, pointing at me and nodding once.

“Exactly!” She walked closer and leaned in like she was telling a secret in a room full of people, “He asked me what type of rings girls like!” I laughed out loud, shocking Hange when I had to hold my stomach too. Levi was still afraid to ask me these things and I wondered who he was going to for advice because it was pretty sound. Any gift he’d get me, minus the rose balm, was something that I liked and I knew he didn’t have any idea what was likable about it. Dresses and hair clips were not Captain Levi’s specialty.

“Specifically you and no one else? Will I have three or four people asking me this same question?” She joined me on the table, moving to grab a pencil and a pad of paper.

“Erwin and I this morning at our brief. The one where nothing gets done. He didn’t talk the whole time and when he did he asked that of all things. Must’ve been on his mind.” She nudged me, handing me the pencil to draw. Honestly, I’d never put thought to it, even when I’d look at Analee’s in awe as a little girl. Her's was too thick. Too gold. Too complicated. I needed to use my hands a lot at the bakery too, so it had to be something I could take on and off. And something I wouldn’t feel bad getting dirty.

“I don’t have to draw it. Just a simple silver circle.” She looked at me, blinking twice, before grabbing the pencil from me.

“Well that isn’t what I thought you would say. What about something like this?” She lifted the pad, showing me something she’d draw up with three stones. No.

“I don’t want stones.” Her mouth fell open.

“You have a man who probably hordes money stacks taller than him and you don’t want him to buy you something expensive? What about just one stone?” She quickly erased the two on the side and I shook my head. Levi did, seemingly, have lots of money to spend since he just put away his Military notes and didn’t spend it, but I didn’t care about that.

“Receiving something expensive just because it’s expensive isn’t genuine. I just want something simple, Han. A silver ring. Maybe a bit thinner than normal.”

“Eva,” she put the pad down on the table, turning to grab my hands, “He’s not going to believe me if I tell him that.”

“But that’s what I want, Hange. Tell him that I want him to have one too.” She groaned and let go of my hands, jumping off of the table to go to her desk.

“He’s going to be annoyed with me again! He thinks you want some big, complicated affair and even I told him that you don’t expect that of him.” I turned to her, glancing again at the worn notebook. Maybe I’d ask her to look at it.

“He said I wanted something big? Does he know that between the two of us there are exactly five family members and a handful of Scouts? Besides, I know he won’t agree to a wedding.” She held her hand up, shaking both it and her head.

“I’m not too sure about that one. It seems he’s willing to do anything you want on this topic. He’s just mentally preparing himself.” I snorted, thinking about how long he’s made me wait since he first proposed the idea.

“He has to ask me first before I can think about a wedding or a get-together. I also have to tell those same five family members that this is even happening. Dragging Jonas or even Ben to a wedding is hard to begin with, but a wedding they probably oppose? Not going to happen. I just told him we can go to the city center and have it done there. I’m content with that.” In a huff, she plopped down in her office chair, shaking her head and not understanding why someone would make this such a simple process. While Hange said she’d never get married, she always thought about the partying aspect of it. She also said that if she had the chance, she’d like to try to drink Levi under the table and a wedding was the perfect place for that. I was probably ruining her dreams as we speak.

“So silver, thin ring. Easy to find, not easy to convince him that’s what you want.” I frowned and my hands went out to my sides.

“I don’t understand why it’s so hard? It’s not like I’m spending money left and right!” The look in her eyes flattened, and she followed with a deadpan.

“You spent almost five hundred notes on a new coffee machine because it was in a peach color.” I hopped of the table in my defense, but the door opened before I was able to.

“What are you two yelling about in here?” I stood up straight, turning to the man of the hour, and just shook my head.

“Just bad things about you.” He rolled his eyes at my smile, a faint one on his lips, before grabbing my hand and turning back to the door.

“Bye, Hange!” I waved, and Levi just grunted.

“Do you even have conversations with her or does she just talk at you?” It was my turn to roll my eyes as I closed the door of his office behind me, following him to his desk. When he sat down, ready to start some paperwork, I sat the other way on his lap, chest to chest. This was our ritual, having found it out late one night when Levi’s heart couldn’t be calmed down from his nightmare. When he was stressed, this would calm him down easily, having my hands work out knots in his back and him able to bury his face in my hair to ground him. It was also just comfortable. Therefore, every time he would do paperwork, an always stressful situation, he would have me sit like that. Now, it was just muscle memory.

“Conversations. You just don’t talk to anyone.” I lifted my hands to between his shoulder blades where he would always get knots. He sighed into my hair, scribbling something down on the paper in front of him.

“I’m sorry to tell you this, but I just signed off on an expedition that falls a few days before your birthday.” I pulled back, looking him in the eyes and hoping my pout would turn around a military decision. Obviously it didn’t work, but he raised one hand to pat my head.

“Don’t worry, I’ll still marry you when we get back. I’m a man of my word.”

“Mhm, sure.” He scoffed and pushed my head back to where it was playfully. I complied, but this time I punished him but not massaging his back.

“Your little kids graduate that day. Didn’t you say they’d come visit you or something?” I subconsciously traced his back, pulling myself closer to feel his heat.

“The last letter I received from them was last year. In it he said they graduated at Trost, so once they are free, they can come to the cafe and wait for you all to get back from your expedition before joining the Scouts officially. I’ve heard they all three are doing pretty good though. Survived that winter hike you were talking about.” He just nodded, now paying more attention to his paperwork.

“You said there were two boys and a girl? Sure they’re joining the Scouts if they’re doing well? Top ten usually go to MPs.”

I shook my head, “No, Eren was quite serious about the Scouts. I don’t know the other two though. You’re assured one.” He huffed once in laughter.

“Great.”

“His resolve seems solid too.”

“Mhm.” I shifted my eyes to see how concentrated he was on his paperwork. When he had the tip of his tongue out, that’s when you knew he wasn’t going to pay attention to anything else.

“Who knows if he’s a good fighter though?”

“Yeah.”

“Maybe they’ll all go to the Garrison if they can’t fight.”

“Yes.”

“When are you going to the capital to get me a ring?”

“Tomorrow.” I pulled away from him, trying to find his eyes, but he lowered his head, noting the mistake he just made.

“Tomorrow?” I poked at him, my smile going from ear to ear. I could even see a little blush that painted his cheeks.

“If you keep bothering me, it will be never.”

Trost was bustling that day, and rightfully so. I was three days away from finally being married, the two, slim silver bands hanging off a small chain around my neck, and the new cadets had gathered on top of the walls. There were even more people in the café than there had been these last few months. It was, honestly, a perfect day, and I hoped that this atmosphere would last for a while. The famine had brought down morale and business, so much so, that it was getting to the point where the café would only be open three times a week, and even then I would sit there in an empty space for hours with Elias doing his school work. Today, however, June and Elias were talking to their friends who had shown up to buy a slice of pie with their pocket change. It was fun to see kids be kids again, and I hoped that I could introduce June and Elias to the other three, seeing they were all close in age. June and Armin, they would like each other seeing they were both bookworms. Eren and Elias, well, they could gush more about the Scouts together, even when Eren is almost considered a Scouts. The possibilities were making me happy, the prospect of the next three days was making me happy, and I had gotten word that the Scouts would be back in the early morning unlike before. The day of my birthday. It really was an unusual day in Trost.

It was warm too. Looking back on it now, I remember it being unusually warm for spring. So warm that I had to go and open the front windows of the café, leaning over the table that June and Elias sat at. I took a moment to marvel at the walls too, noticing the increase in people, and trying, even if it was too far anyways, to spot one of the three. Even if you were closer to the outer wall than the inner, they looked like ants all the way on the top. I closed my eyes, feeling the small amount of breeze run through my hair. It was a moment of peace.

And one I took for granted.

There was a sound, larger than thunder, and it flashed. When I opened my eyes, coupled with the screams, there it stood. I didn’t even have time for fear to well in my eyes when a blast of air sent me flying into the edge of the window. I let out a gasp as my back slammed into the edge, knocking the wind out of me. It shattered the screens I had just opened too. There were screams all over the place and I didn’t want to open my eyes. I didn’t want it to be true. No. No. No. Why now? Why when all the Scouts were gone? It had been so long since I’d thought about the possibility of this happening, and now, when I opened my eyes again, shaking in fear, the Colossal Titan looked back. Like everyone else around me, I let out a piercing scream.

xx Ah yes, we’re finally here. Attack on Titan. No more sweet and cute moments :) maybe some,,,,,,

Chapter Nineteen→

Chapter Masterlist

#LEVI ACKERMAN #levi ackerman x reader #levi ackerman x oc #aot x oc #attack on titan x oc #aot x reader #attack on titan levi #levi ackerman scenario #shingeki no kyoujin levi #snk levi #aot levi #snk x reader #snk x oc #shingeki no kyojin #captain levi

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ljf613 · 3 years

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Colonization & Imperialism in ATLA

One of the things I’ve noticed in fandom complaints about the ATLA comics-- namely, “The Promise”-- and subsequently, LOK’s worldbuilding, is the way the narrative handles colonization.

I see a lot about how what the Earth Kingdom chose to do with the former colonies is “none of Zuko’s (or Aang’s) business.” (I also see people talking about how Katara would never support colonialism, in any shape or form, no matter the circumstances.)

And I just.... don’t vibe with those ideas? At all?

Like, I definitely have problems with the comics-- especially “The Promise,” where all the drama centers around Miscommunications of Epic Proportions and could have been resolved in Part One if all the characters just sat down and listened to each other (not to mention that Aang would never have agreed to make that promise, nor would Zuko have asked it of him (Sokka would be a more obvious choice, but that’s a different discussion))-- but I never had any issues with their worldbuilding.

I love the idea of Yu Dao, and the fact that the narrative acknowledges that a new kind of world has new kinds of problems. It makes sense to me that we can’t always just “give back the land we took.” And I found the idea of the end solution being “give the people who live there their own country” really cool and empowering.

So I want to talk about why I feel this way. About what kind of real-world parallels can be made here. About some little-known bits of world-history that compare.

(Please note that for this meta I am only going to be discussing the relationship between Fire Nation and the Earth Kingdom. As far as I am aware-- and I could be wrong-- there is no real-world genocide quite comparible to what Sozin did to the Air Nomads, and most of the people alive in ATLA were not actually around for or involved in that. And the relationship the Fire Nation has with the Water Tribes-- and that the North and South have with each other-- is worth a whole separate analysis, and doesn’t deserve to just be shoved into this one.)

(Disclaimer: While this is in response to some of the interpretations I’ve seen on this site, it is not meant to discount or invalidate those fans’ views-- I’m just trying to show my take on it. I am a firm believer in the power of active discourse, and the value of looking at the same scenes through different lenses, rather than just getting one opinion and accepting it as Absolute Truth.)

The main thing I notice in general ATLA discourse-- and not just on this topic, but in any sort of meta about the Fire Nation, colonization, and global impact-- is that the fandom mostly compares the war and its after-affects to real-world Imperialism, the Age of Imperialism, New Imperialism, and Colonization.

And I understand why that is. In the grand scheme of world history, that era is still fairly recent, and we are still dealing with the afteraffects from it. It has shaped the Western World’s worldview on every level. (Not to mention that the Euro-centric way we’re taught history means that this piece of world history is the one we’re most exposed to, and so have the most understanding of and room to analyze/criticize.)

However, there are a few issues with sticking only to this perspective.

First off, the Age of Imperialism was a direct response to the Age of Exploration. This was the period of time when white Europeans sailed around the world acting as though they were discovering new places and pretending that there weren’t already existing civilizations there.

[ID: Two dots meme, edited so that Guy A says “i’ve discovered a NEW WORLD,” Guy B replies “you didn’t discover ****,” and Guy A insists “i’ve discovered it” / End ID.]

Now, I’ve mentioned this in passing, but the world of ATLA doesn’t appear to have had an Age of Exploration. There’s no vast “undiscovered” land masses, the four nations have always known about each other, and they all have a shared language.

The whole foundation for the Age of Imperialism was “oh, look, there are all these ‘unexplored’ lands with resources ripe for the picking (who cares about the indigenous people, they’re just simplistic savages who don’t know what’s best for them), let’s see which European country can grab the most land first.”

This was a race. This was sudden. This was Europeans coming in and taking over while viewing the natives as bothersome pests. This was about multiple major world powers competing over resources.

This was not 100 years of active warfare between a single conquering country and the very people they were trying to conquer.

The parallels don’t hold up.

Secondly, by focussing only on this one kind of historical narrative, we ignore any others.

I will admit that I have used the word “imperialism” in reference to the Fire Nation a time or two. However, upon further reflection, I realize I didn’t really mean imperialism, which is actually a fairly modern concept. What I feel the Fire Nation is really an example of is centralism and expansionism-- two ideaologies that have been a way of life for conquering empires throughout history.

(I am in no way qualified to explain the differences between these concepts-- I recommend doing your own research if you’re curious.)

The Persian Empire. The Greek Empire. The Roman Empire. The Byzantine Empire. The Mongolian Empire. The Russian Empire. The First French Empire.

You could take any of these (or numerous others) and make an interesting analysis between the similarities and differences between their behaviors and that of the Fire Nation. And maybe I’ll do that someday.

However, I started this to talk about Yu Dao and all of the other so-called colonies (I really feel like territories would be a better word, but, again, that’s a whole ’nother discussion), and I’d like to focus on that.

FYI, here’s a basic history refresher: If two countries are at war, and then they decide to end the war, neither country is required to return captured territories. They can make a treaty and agree to do so, but there is no obligation to. The Fire Nation didn’t just march in and say, “this is our land now”-- they fought for it. They captured that land. Just because the war is over doesn’t mean they need to just give it back.

Like it or not, that is the way the world operated for thousands of years, and so that is the interpretation I’m working with here.

In any case, “The Promise” actually presents this as a three-way conversation. There’s Zuko (and, by default, the Fire Nation), Kuei (and, by default, Ba Sing Se and the Earth Kingdom), and the people of Yu Dao themselves.

(My understanding of the Earth Kingdom’s style of government is that it’s made up of a large collection of different ethno-cultural regions who all answer to Ba Sing Se.)

I’ll let Sokka explain it:

[ID: Comic panel from Part Three of “The Promise.” Sokka and Katara are talking, both in obvious states of agitation, while Suki and Toph are looking at something in the background. Sokka is saying, “Let me see if I got this. The protestors and the Earth Kingdom Army want the colonials to go, the Fire Nation Army wants the colonials to stay, and the Yu Dao Resistance just want their city to be left alone?” Katara responds, “Yes!” / End ID.]

The people of Yu Dao don’t care about the war. They don’t even really care who’s in charge. They just want to be left alone.

This speaks to me on a very personal level, so I’m going to make another real-world comparison here:

My ancestors first came to America to escape from the poverty and opression they were experiencing in a place known as “White Russia”-- that is, Belarus. To be clear, I am not talking about the country “Belarus,” but the region, which includes the modern-day countries of Lithuania, Ukraine, Belarus, Latvia and Moldova, as well as parts of Poland and Russia.

I looked up White Russia, trying to find out how much information someone who didn’t grow up hearing stories about what it was like (that is, most of the people reading this,) might have. I didn’t find much. Most of what I found talked about political ideologies and such-- things that your average poor peasant, struggling just eke out a living, didn’t have much energy to care about. So let me paint a(n oversimplified) picture for you.

Imagine you’re a poor shoemaker in a small town on the Russian border. You spend your days hard at work, trying to earn a living to support your wife and nine children. You’ve never left the town you were born in. One day you get the news: Russia and Poland are fighting again. Your two oldest sons (ages 15 and 17) are forcibly drafted off to fight in the Russian army; you never see them again and have no way of knowing if they’re dead or alive (they’re probably dead). Poland wins-- this time. Congratulations, your town is now part of Poland.

Does suddenly being Polish make a difference to your life? Not in the slightest. Two or three years down the line, you’ll go back to being part of Russia again. This is the third or fourth time you’ve seen your town switch hands, and you can’t say you prefer one government over the other. It doesn’t really matter who’s in charge-- you’re still faced with crippling taxes, forced drafts, and various other forms of oppression. (It doesn’t help that you happen to be part of a persecuted minority.)

(This is why I have many ancestors who may never have left the town they were born in, and yet records show that they were born in one country, got married in another, and died in a third.)

This is the kind of worldview through which I am looking at Yu Dao. (Obviously, it’s not an exact parallel, but neither is the standard “colonizers vs oppressed natives” lens.)

My ancestors eventually got fed up with the treatment they were receiving from their respective governments, and left to build a new life, in a new place. But the citizens of Yu Dao don’t have anywhere to go. The only two real world powers in this story are the Fire Nation and the Earth Kingdom, neither of which has ever before expressed any true interest or concern in the actual people of Yu Dao.

The Earth Kingdom didn’t really care about the city before the war-- they were just another poor, struggling town, whose citizens were barely able to make ends meet. And while the Fire Nation may have helped the place grow into a bustling town, they also established a hierarchy that did not serve in the citizens’ best interests.

And so, in “The Promise,” these citizens’ frustrations come to a head. “Enough,” they say, “we don’t want to be used as a pawn in your games anymore.”

And Zuko and Kuei (and Aang) actually listen. They say “we need to start thinking about these people as people, not as symbols of one side or the other. It’s time to give them a say in their future.”

And a new country-- a new way of life-- is born.

(Is it perfect? Absolutely not. But it is constantly evolving and changing, trying to do better, be better. And that’s more than you can say about most of the other countries in this world.)

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