#I LIKE to think our posse is strong enough to take it now but I feel like I keep disproportionately training certain people over others

[wanderlust-in-my-soul]

My weekly roundup CW 11

Well, I watch a lot during the week, as you all might know. I really want to write a little bit more about the stuff I watch, but time and work kind of get in my creative way. So I try to write down my thoughts after watching stuff to create a little weekly ranking on my, most of the times, quiet sundays (and because I love lists and this is a good excuse for me to create a new OneNote journal!).

☼ 1. Chains of Heart (Epside 5)

The series I am looking forward to the most every week. I just enjoy it to a healthy amount. Well, slowly but surely everything becomes a little clearer. The biggest mystery for me is indeed Mr. Lue's gloves! Why are you wearing them? What can people tell from your hands? And dude, yeah, you're scarred, I get it, but come on! It's warm and humid in Thailand and you're walking around with a turtleneck and jacket over it. I'd melt! But well, the plot, I don't really care much about it. I just celebrate Ken and Mr. Lue. I think they're cute together and I enjoy that awkward shyness between them! At least there was a confession. Now Ken just needs to finally take a proper look. And yes, the series looks just awesome! There were so many great shots again this episode too! Beautiful!

☼ 2. A Shoulder To Cry On (Episode 1+2)

A strong start. The character of Jo Tae Hyun is at first unsympathetic, even if you can notice that there is something grumbling under the surface. As a reader of the webtoon, I know roughly what will happen, but I hope that the series manages to change some elements and show some of the "love" between the two, which the author herself said was not so easy for her to create. The two members of Omega X make a good first impression and you can already tell that they feel comfortable with each other. In the second episode, the chemistry of the two is just great and I like how they get closer, almost become friends, how Jo Tae Hyun becomes calmer and nicer and Lee Da Yeol lets other people into his life, makes friends. We learn something about Tae Hyun's past, nothing really revealing yet of course, just that he seems to have a dark past. I like the two of them together.

☼ 3. Our Datin Sim (Episode 3+4)

I really like these two. They are awkward and cute together at the same time. We finally have a confession from Eddy at the end of the fourth episode, which of course we've known since the first episode, that he likes Wan too, still! The only fear I have is that Wan will run away again, but Eddy already said he won't let him go now. That's it, hold on to your man!

☼ 4. Unintentionally Love Story (Episode 1+2)

I love it. Could be because of the main character, but whatever. Our protagonists get to know each other and there is definitely attraction on both sides. Now the only problem is that our cute Ji Won Young just plays his future love interest. Sure, he wants his job back, but nope, that's just drama! I don't want drama with them, I just want cotton candy and smitten grins! Damn. Our second couple will provide enough drama I guess..

☼ 5. The Promise (Episode 4)

I love the series. Phu and Nan aren't really progressing at the moment and I could slap them against the wall. It's obvious that they like each other. So obvious! And I already can't stand the drama arising from Phu's secrecy. Granny's friend was definitely correct: lying gets you nowhere. Now Phu just needs to take a cue from Granny and her posse and put his balls back in his pants and finally talk straight to Nan. Otherwise it will really hurt in the end. Everyone sees it, just Phu apparently not quite yet…I still like the two of them together. However! Should Nan have enough of Phu at the end and look else where for a new partner and seek comfort in the arms of Party, he has my blessing!

☼ 6. Bed Friend (Epsidoe 5)

Okay, King marks his territory in front of Krit, the new boss - don't know if this was a good idea...he just woke up a hunter. I'm confused about the status of King and Uea. Are they no longer just friends with benefits, just because King kissed Uea in the parking garage? What is certain is that King is a bit in love with Uea and that Uea is not permanently rebuilding his walls and granting King access. Nice. Uea's mother? Not so nice. I wouldn't have a problem with her disappearing from the scene.

☼ 7. Jack o'Frost (Episode 5)

I knew that it would be unpleasant when the truth comes to light. Can trust be restored, can we start over together? We were left with these questions and I have no idea how it will turn out. I do indeed understand both sides, doesn't mean I approve of Fumiya's concealments. I liked that Ritsu listened to him, not everyone would have and I respect his decision in the end and didn't expect anything else. Let's see what next week's finale brings.

☼ 8. A Boss And A Babe (Epsiode 3)

If the intern takes you to the shower during a video call, I think you can be sure that he won't be embarrassed easily. It's a scene that sticks in the mind. The development between the two is surprisingly quick, after all Gun is just introduced to Cher's mother already. The two are definitely cute together, and I like the scenes in which Gun is a bit cooled down the best. He's a bit of a pain in the ass when he yaps without point or shame.

☼ 9. The End Of The World With You (Episode 8/FInale)

I have only one thing to say about this finale, and that is a gif:

That sums up the absurdity of how this ended quite well. The series started really well and I was excited, but as it progressed it became a bit fantastic and that just wasn't implemented that well. Was Yuma a little god now and did he know it all along or was he a retelling of the little prince? I don't know. Was it a fever dream? Who knows. The end is open and gives room for reflection, all in all a quite positive end, in which it was once again shown that it is worthwhile to live on, even if the future may not look so rosy (I leave out here that you would have to have the perfect partner, because even without him you can come to this realization).

☼ 10. All The Liquors (Epsiode 5+6)

The alcohol, the alcohol…I can't quite get my head around the concept of this series. Now the previously abstinent boss wants to change and happily drinks alcohol along, has no problem ordering alcohol or with drunk guests. I don't really know. Yes, love can move mountains and if your crush is a heavy alcoholic (sorry, but I can't see him as anything else), then you have to change and start drinking yourself, right? This is a normal conclusion. After all, that's what etiquette wants. A beach scene could not be missing. Yes, the two are quite cute together, but somehow the alcohol brings me again and again away from liking this series…could be personal experience with the subject that I can not approve of this excessive consumption of alcoholic beverages…

☼ 11. Tin Tem Jai (Episode 3)

This was not the worst watch of the week! I am surprised myself and would not have expected it. But with episode three and Tin's cheerfulness dialed down a bit, the series is actually quite cute. The subtitles don't make sense some time, the dialogue and characters are a bit…simple-minded (you act so manly, I didn't think you had your period…), but it was quite okay this week. Tin can be really annoying with his flirting with Park, but you can also tell that Park isn't all that resistant to it. I still don't get a lot of the relationships, and I still don't understand why so many little girls are left alone somewhere by their mothers, or dropped off at the next best thing. And I also don't understand Tin's painting lessons.

☼ 12. PasSenger (Epsiode 2)

The series shines for me on an unimaginative script and acting performances that I already feared would not pick me up. The only positive was the portrayal of Bamee and his developing crush on Kiao. He did a pretty good job with that. Other than that…anyone who has seen My gear and your gown or My engineer will notice that not that much has changed in the acting power of the two mains…It's just not my cup of tea. I admit it, I watched it in double speed…not a good sign, maybe I drop this soon….

#josi watching bl #chains of heart #a shoulder to cry on #our dating sim #unintentional love story #the promise #bed friend #jack o' frost #a boss and a babe #the end of the world with you #all the liquors #tin tem jai #past senger #sunday charts #bl series #bl drama

[ghostfaey]

La sparizione - chapter nine

Summary: Plagued by the ghosts of her past, Riona has hidden away for centuries. That is until the call for help of a certain seer finds her and begs her to save her brother. Not knowing how her life will change, she finds her way to Volterra, directly in front of the leaders of the Volturi.

Trigger Warning: Violence, SA, blood, Death of Children, Murder, just some nasty things

<<<chapter eight chapter ten>>>

My fingers touch the soft petals of the beautiful red flower in front of me. So fragile. 

Her smell is sweet and reminds me of honey. The setting sun is hidden behind thick clouds, not strong enough to make her way through. The wind that carries all those different smells to me is soft and warm. It plays with the lose strands of my copper hair, which I put into a braid.

Being in these gardens makes me feel at home. More so than being inside the walls of the castle. The greens here come not close to the rich fields of my home but when I close my eyes I can almost pretend I'm there. Of course, only if ignoring the sounds of the tourists inside and outside the castle and their sickly sweet smell that makes my mouth water.

It is a tiring life. Always drinking. Always thirsty. There is never enough blood to sustain the thirst one feels.

"Riona." I hear my name being said and not a second later I feel a familiar warm presence next to me. A smile lays itself upon my lips and I turn around to look into Marcus ruby eyes.

"Marcus.", I speak his name with hidden affection. He chuckles and offers me his arm.

"May I keep you company?", he asks. I entwine our arms and nod. 

"Of course, are you already done with your trials for today?" I wonder as we stride through the gardens. 

He sights. 

"Well, not exactly. But I am sure my brothers can handle those last few trials without me.", he admits.

I giggle and look up at him. "Ah so you snuck away from them. How terribly irresponsible of you, Marcus." The mockery in my voice is clear and he starts laughting as he looks down at me with clear adoration in his eyes. 

"Well I'm sure they have noticed by now, afterall I do not hold  the gift you posses."

True, Marcus gift is a lot more subtle. Being able to see bonds. I wonder what it is like to see all and every conection there is between different individuals.

We reach a small stone bench which looks upon a beautiful crafted well and he lets me take a seat. He sits next to me, still like always keeping his distance. Respecting my boundaries. 

His hands fold upon his lap and my gaze swiftly lays itself on them. My heart is telling me to reach out, to lay my fingers upon his and entwine our hands so that I can feel the porcelain like skin under the tips of my fingers. But I won't. 

Instead I focus my gaze on the well in front of me and muster the little weeds that grow in between the bricks.

"What is it like? To see the bonds, I mean?", I ask him, my curiosity winning the better of me.

For a long time it is silent and I begin to wonder if I have truly evn spoken my question outloud or if it was merly a thought of mine. But then I hear the deep tenor of Marcus' calm voice.

"It is beautiful. So beautiful that I can almost not put it into words. When I look at bonds I do not only see whom is attached to whom, but also feel their warmth, their loyality, their love.", he explains and I almost think to hear his voice quiver. "For the longest time it was pure heartache for me to look at them. I would wish this gift away. I would beg any kind of god that is out there to make me unable to see these bonds between people because they only ever made me grief what I had lost and could not have ever again."

To hear those words come from him, to feel the pain he feels, makes me look at him. And despite me knowing that all this that I am feeling for him isn't real, despite trying to fight for us to have a real bond between us, one made out of loyality and love, crafted with time, despite all that I let myself go and finally reach out for his hand. 

My fingers lay themself around his right hand and a shiver runs through me, the feeling of his cold skin against mine almost making me gasp. His head snaps towards me and his eyes meet mine before his whole body turns towards me. I smile at him, wanting to ease his pain away. 

Without second thought his hand encloses mine, as if it were the most natural thing there is. Maybe it is.

He leans in closer to me and I force myself to not beg him to come even closer.

"Our bond, I saw it before I lay my eyes upon you, Riona. I first thought it was only a delusion. The soft golden colour warming my heart like the rays of the summer sun. I have not felt this warmth within me for such a long time. What a dream come true when I did catch sight of you. Like waking up from a long nightmare."

The feelings those words leave within me is one I cannot describe. In some way it pains me, but in an oddly comforting way. The compassion and adoration Marcus is showing me is strange, unfamiliar. I do not know what to say, how to react. And still I want him to know that his words have touched me and that I am so truly thankful for the peace he is bringing me during those odd times and the gentleness he is treating me with.

I squeze his hand before my other one finds it's way up to his cheek. I can see him twitch as my fingers make contact with his face. My thumb caresses the skin right under his eye. 

Just a bit closer.

I catch his gaze falling upon my lips for just a second.

Not yet.

"Thank you, Marcus." My voice is soft, nothing but a whisper, carried away by the wind. "For everything."

His eyes meet mine. 

"Nothing I will ever do will be enough, dear Riona.", he speaks. "Yet still, I will spend eternity trying."

There are no more words left for me to say. Suddenly they were taken away from me and all there's left to do for me is to nod. 

As I lean in, tilting my head. 

A wave of pine overcomes me just a second before my lips meet his cheek. 

If I still had a beating heart it would surely be pounding right out of my chest right now. 

My body yearning to be even closer, to pull myself against him, to hold him and not let him go. The feeling so overwhelming that tears threaten to spill. 

Pulling myself away as to not lose control over my own body I loosen my grip on him, bringing my hands to my face as to wipe away all the feelings that I do not wish to have.

And I want to cry. Truly I want to cry. For I do not know my one body, my own feelings anymore. And nothing makes sense but somehow it does and all I do is wrong and right at the same time and I feel like the ocean has pulled me deep underwater, whirling me around until I do not know anymore where is up and where is down.

I feel a strong arm sneaking it's way around my waist. 

Marcus pulls me against his chest, his right hand finding it's way unto the back of my head, caressing it softly. Gently tucked in under his chin I once again wish I could sleep as everything comes crashing down. 

#aro volturi #breaking dawn #marcus volturi #caius volturi #newmoon #twilight #twilight fandom #fanfiction #twilight fanfiction #volturi

[overheardschoolbus]

Best moment of my life:

About two hours after I take my K-5’s home, I go through the same neighborhood for my last student of the day. I keep my eyes peeled for my younger students playing in the neighborhood about 15x more carefully than I do for any other pedestrians. It’s been seven days of school and I think I really like the students I got this year. I’ve been going crazy learning and practicing all 50+ names and faces and personalities best I can.

The last student on my bus is in 6th grade. If he were a year younger he’d be on my elementary bus too, but he’s now a magnet student at the prep school. I just met him last week and I’m proud of him. He also keeps his eyes peeled for his former bus friends.

Finally, on just the second Friday of the school year, I’m creeping down 22nd avenue and I spot a little posse of bicycles. I slow down to give them space.

As I approach, I see they’ve stopped their bikes and are squinting to watch the school bus (for them, school’s been out for hours, they’re curious). I’m attentive, so I notice the moment my rowdiest third grader’s eyes widen and he points and with the biggest grin on his face yells “It’s our bus driver!!” and suddenly four little boys are hollering my name and waving.

I quickly opened my window so I could wave back and start racking my brain for these kids names, but I’m struggling to process because I’m so startled that they remembered my name when I only introduced myself maybe once.

My sixth grader then pops his head out the window ((we stay inside the bus, guys)) and the students happily greet each other. The younger kids marvel that their former bus mate really has moved on to the older, wiser world of Middle School™, and there he is!

But I’m still exploding with happiness in my heart. I’ve admittedly got a tricky name for most people to remember…

I think of the excitement I felt, that they were pleased and connected enough with me as their new bus driver, that they could call me by name. I think of the 120-ish students I will transport every day this year and the effort it’s taking to learn their names. I’m about 65% there.

I’m instantly convinced. It’s worth it. I want every child on my bus to feel as special to me as just then I had felt special to my students. I will get excited, I will smile, I will cheer their names.

Last year was rough, I struggled to connect with my students. This year, I’m encouraged. I started strong, I will keep going. Nothing will stop me.

Thanks, boys! See you Monday :)

#not a quote #story time #I’m so soft for this moment #I could have cried #on Monday I start grinding away at my getting to know my high schoolers #it’s intimidating to me bc I don’t feel much older than them #but I am #i am an adult in their life #and I will show the proper enthusiasm for them and their futures #bus story

[kylorenisadorkable]

How TROS Failed Rey

These are just my opinions and from my personal perspective, if these things worked for you in the movie then cool, but this is why it was never going to work for me.

A Feminine Power Fantasy

Growing up in the 90s there wasn't a ton of media that had female lead characters. I grew up with strong female characters but they were often relegated to being the token girl of the group (see the Smurfette principle), the story was never centered around them and we never got to experience things from their point of view or really get to know their story. It felt like I was being asked to relate to male characters but boys were never asked or expected to relate to female characters.

Just as young boys see themselves as Luke, leading the adventure I also wanted to see myself as the main character. I wanted to have my own adventures.

When I first saw TFA, I went in knowing nothing about the movie. I had seen the OT and the Prequels as a kid and I had thought they were ok but I wasn't a huge Star Wars fan and in hindsight I really think this was due to the lack of female representation, Leia and Padme are great but I never really felt like I really got to know them as people. Not to mention that these characters are 2 women out of a cast that's predominantly male, it just seemed like the message LF was sending was that Star Wars is for boys, yeah girls can watch it if they want to but this isn't a series that is meant for you. So as you could guess I wasn't really expecting much from these new Star Wars movies, but I was pleasantly surprised.

I fell in love with Rey's character during those first 3 minutes of her introduction. During this brilliant example of “show don't tell,” story telling they were really able to convey so much about Rey's character and personality, I really began to care for her and felt like I understood her, as I could relate to her loneliness and isolation in my own way. And I was excited to see a story from a major fantasy/adventure franchise told from a feminine perspective. It felt like I was finally getting the representation I wanted to see.

So what happened? How did we go from Luke's line “And I will not be the Last Jedi” which is essentially him “passing the torch” to Rey, the next generation, to “One day I will earn your brother's saber?” 

As if the saber didn't already choose her in the Force Awakens? Why did they decide that all of a sudden Rey was unworthy? Didn't Yoda say “that library held nothing that the girl Rey didn't already posses?” which yes was a clever way of saying that Rey already took the jedi texts with her but was also implying that she already had everything she needed within herself to be a jedi (courage, humility, compassion etc...). Why did they take a step backwards in the last movie in the franchise? Insisting that Rey needed to train, that she suddenly wasn't good enough?

I can't say for sure what happened to lead up to this point. Was it just that the creative team gave in to the pressuring of a loud minority of alt-right youtubers and bots. Were they relying on Reddit and Twitter for public opinion rather than doing actual marketing research?  While I think that this was definitely a big factor I think there was just a general misunderstanding of the characters on Terrio's and JJ's part to begin with.

What Does Rey Want/Need?

To know where they went wrong, we have to ask ourselves who is Rey? All characters have a story goal, or the thing they want. By the end of the story the character will either get what they want after some struggles of course or learn that the thing that they want isn't what they need. So what does Rey want?  To understand what she wants we have to first understand her wound or past experience that caused emotional pain and interferes with the character's life. Rey's wound stems from her  abandonment. Along with the wound, comes the concept of the false lie. What is a lie that the character believes about themselves that we as the audience knows is untrue? Rey's lie is first, that her family is going to come back for her. 

The other lie she tells herself is the belief that she is worthless because she was abandoned, as she tells everyone she meets “I'm no one“ or “I'm just a scavenger.”

When Daisy Ridley was asked in an interview why Rey says she's “No One.” Ridley says it's because our relationships to people define so much of who we are and without relationships then who are we?  This makes sense considering that our parents are major influences in our development and in how we think about ourselves through much of our lives.

Rey seeks out parental figures, thinking that through them she'll figure out where she belongs. “Whoever you're waiting for on Jakku, they're never coming back. But there's someone who still could. The Belonging you seek is not behind you. It is ahead.” 

Rey initially believes that Maz is referring to Luke and when she later sets off to find him. She believe that he is going to be able to give her answers, and provide her with the belonging that she longs for, but Luke ultimately ends up disappointing her but finds comfort in her relationship with Ben.

This goes back to the idea that what Rey thinks she wants, Isn't necessarily what she needs. As JJ stated in the directors commentary of The Force Awakens, “So there was a very powerful idea that what she desperately wanted was belonging, which she’ll get, but just not how she expects.”

JJ and Terrio try to fullfill Rey's need through “found family” the family she finds with her friends and the resistance, but I think there is more to Rey's desire of wanting family that can't be satisfied by this alone. Finn, Poe, Leia are definitely a part of her journey in finding belonging but they're not the final piece to the puzzle. Otherwise she would have felt completely fulfilled by the end of The Last Jedi when she is on the Falcon surrounded by her friends.

I think part of Rey's desire for family, is also the desire to be understood, to be “seen.”  Rey even tells Finn in TROS that “People keep telling me they know me. No one does.” We hear Ben's response in the trailer “But I do...” (which was cut from the movie)

Ben has always been shown to be the person who truly “sees” Rey. He sees even the aspects of herself that she doesn't like to acknowledge. Recognizing that her holding on to her parents is affecting her negatively and that if she really wants to “find herself” she needs to let go.

Which is why when Ben says “You have no place in this story. You're nothing. But not to me.” What is really being expressed is “I don't care about where you come from and I see you for who you are.”  

This is why I believe that Ben was always suppose to be the final piece to the belonging Rey is searching for. As their narratives are intertwined. They both satisfy each others needs as characters, Rey's need to be seen for who she is and Ben's need for reconciliation and healing within his family.

Rey Palpatine

Rian Johnson said that when he began working on The Last Jedi, he wrote out all the character's names and next to them wrote what would be the hardest thing for that character to face. For Rey, this was that she needs to stand on her own two feet and define who she is for herself but JJ and Terrio seemed to have misunderstood this as Terrio states that,

“We also thought that Rey’s arc cannot be finished after Episode VIII. You can leave Episode VIII and say, “Well, now, Rey is content. She’s discovered her parents aren’t Skywalkers, or whatever, and that’s fine.” But so much of her personal story was about where she came from, what kept her on Jakku all those years and the trauma that shaped her. We see quite strongly in Episode VII that something mysterious and troubling happened to her. Although she did get some answers in Episode VIII, we didn’t feel that that story was over. We felt that there were still more questions in Rey’s head about where she came from and where she was going. So, that was the other big idea that we had to address in this film. Rian’s answer to, “What’s the worst news that Rey could receive?” was that she comes from junk traders, and that’s true. She does come from junk traders; we didn’t contradict that.”

Rey's conflict wasn't that she came from junk traders. Rey didn't care about “legacy.” Her conflict stemmed from her abandonment. Rey thinks she's “a nobody” not because of her parent's occupation or lineage but because she feels that she must be worthless because why else would her parents give her up? Rey learning that her parents sold her off for drinking money, that they didn't want her, was already a difficult and traumatic truth to overcome. Star Wars is a coming of age story, in the OT Luke grows from being a boy longing for adventure to discovering what it truly means to be a Jedi (following your principles and having a compassionate heart). Rey's journey is about letting go of childhood trauma and discovering her own independence.

It's also strange seeing as JJ had previously stated during The Force Awakens press tour that “I really feel that the assumption that any character needs to have inherited a certain number of midi-chlorians or needs to be part of a bloodline. It's not that I don't believe that as part of the canon, I'm just saying that at 11 years old that wasn't where my heart was. And so I respect and adhere to the canon but I also say that the Force has always seemed to me to be more inclusive and stronger than that.”

And there was still conflict for her to overcome. The one person who she felt truly understood her is now the supreme leader of the first order, will the resistance discover their connection? Will they see her as a traitor? All of this had the potential for great external and internal character conflict, but for some reason they didn't see this as conflict enough to sustain a whole movie?

Instead they gave Luke's character arc in the OT of having a dark side relative to Rey. “Discovering that you actually descended from your adoptive family’s greatest enemy, the same enemy who corrupted Anakin Skywalker and is responsible for the destruction of the Skywalker family in the first place, felt most devastating to us.” This doesn't make any sense to me as it feel like they just gave Rey Luke's internal conflict of being afraid of his dark side, I don't think this was ever a problem for Rey. In fact, in The Last Jedi  she leapt into the dark side cave to face her darkness (her abandonment). Luke even says “You went straight to the dark and you didn't even try to stop yourself.” 

The dark side cave in The Last Jedi was symbolic of Rey coming to terms with her darkness (the parts of herself she wants to hide).  It relates back to Jungian psychology (which much of Star Wars is based on) that people can only become whole through understanding both the light and shadow aspects of their personality. So it doesn't make sense for Rey to be afraid of who she is in the final movie when she just finished a journey where she learned to accept who she was?

Rey Skywalker

Terrio says that the decision to have Rey take on the name “Skywalker” was a way to show that “you can choose your ancestry.” Which is not true and also a strange thing to say considering the trilogy started with this:

But even if this was just awkward phrasing and what Terrio meant to say was that she considers the Skywalkers her family. Does this make sense considering that she didn't have a great relationship with Luke to begin with?

 I've seen it argued that she took the name as a way of honoring Leia but Leia never took the name or considered herself a Skywalker. Also this is another step backwards for Rey's character as The Last Jedi was trying to assert that Rey does not need to keep looking for parental figures to define herself.

So why  must she be a Palpatine, a Skywalker and “all the jedi” anyways? I think this was done for two reasons, the first was because by killing Ben they were going to kill the last of the Skywalker family and they wanted to keep the name tied to the franchise, in case they need the characters for future projects down the line, so they just pushed it onto Rey. The second reason is that I think they were trying to appease the misogynists' who spent the last 4 years calling Rey a “Mary Sue” so they explained her power away through powerful male lineage. It just feels so weird to me, like the creators are saying that we should like Rey not because of who she is as a character but because of who she is in relation to all these other characters we know you like (Luke, Leia, all the jedi that use her as a vessel etc...)

Daisy Ridley has even expressed her frustration with the Rey's lineage debate multiple times, “I love that Rey is such a great character, they’re like: ‘No, no, she has to be… she has to be-’She’s her own person! Let her be her guys, let her live.

Yet even at the end of the final film poor Rey can't seem to catch a break as she's once again asked for her last name. She once again has to justify herself for just existing. Why are surnames suddenly so important in Star Wars now anyways? Shouldn't the correct answer be “just Rey,” now that she's come to accept who she is and where she's come from and shouldn't that be good enough? What happened to the message of anyone can be a hero? That you don't have to come from or align yourself with a powerful family legacy. That we all have the power to make a difference?

TROS seems to be constantly asking Rey to prove herself. And weirdly enough it reminds me in a strange meta way of my own experience being a woman in the fandom and being constantly asked to prove that I'm a “True fan” (whatever the f@#% that means...) to prove that I'm worthy of consuming and participating in this content that male fans feel belongs solely to them.

In Conclusion

So what did our heroine gain in the end? Did she find family and belonging? No. So what does she have in the end? A yellow lightsaber (for merchandising purposes) and a surname of a dead family?  I guess she finally has an answer to give all the nosey nellies, obsessed with ones pedigree that have suddenly popped up all over the galaxy.

It's not a satisfying ending for her, as she's basically right back where she started. Alone, in a desolate desert, once again staring face to face at an old woman (an old woman which at the start of the Force Awakens symbolized her fear of growing old and wasting away her life on Jakku).

Terrio states that  this is not meant to indicate that Rey plans to stay here, “The very last thing Rey would do after all that is to go and live alone in a desert.”  but when that is the last shot you chose to end the movie on then what is the audience suppose to think? The bigger issue however, is that Rey's ending holds no significance to her or her journey. Terrio says that “In our thinking, Rey goes back to Tatooine as a pilgrimage in honor of her two Skywalker masters. Leia’s childhood home, Alderaan, no longer exists, but Luke’s childhood home, Tatooine, does. Rey brings the sabers there to honor the Skywalker twins by laying them to rest — together, finally — where it all began.” Tatooine, the Lars homestead and the twin suns, don't mean anything to Rey.  You know who did mean something to Rey? Who was the one person who understood her, who she had an intimate relationship with, who she explicitly states she wanted to be with? Ben. But he's gone too. But clearly a light saber and surname are more important. Again this all comes from a lack of caring for what Rey wants.

I just wish that the Sequel Trilogy had stayed Rey's trilogy, that she got to be a heroine in her own right not because she was a skywalker, or a palpatine or from some other powerful family. I will always love Rey but I will always hate what they did to her and I'm tired of people invalidating my feelings and telling me that it was a good ending or that it was empowering. I just want heroines to be taken as seriously and to have all the same privileges as male heroes. Let them stand on their own without connecting them back to every male hero in the franchise, let them be their own character, and finally just let them be human, let them fall in love and have relationships if they want to. Male heroes are never considered to be less of a hero for having a love interest, so why are female heroes? Basically what I got out of the Rise of Skywalker, was that it was created by a couple of guys that loved Luke and the OT and could care less about Rey and that's truly heart breaking.

#rey #rey nobody #reylo #ben solo #rey deserved better #rey deserves better #bring ben solo back #I love rey #aTROSity #just rey #reunite the dyad

[gunterfan1992]

Episode Review: ‘Wizard City’ (Distant Lands, Ep. 4)

Airdate: September 2, 2021

Story by: Adam Muto, Jack Pendarvis, Kate Tsang, Hanna K. Nyström, & Charley Feldman

Storyboarded by: Maya Petersen, Hanna K. Nyström, Anna Syvertsson, & Aleks Sennwald, & Haewon Lee

Directed by: Miki Brewster & Jeff Liu (supervising), Sandra Lee (art)

An episode focusing on Peppermint Butler’s dark side is something that the fandom has craved ever since the little guy demanded Finn and Jake’s flesh in season two’s “Death in Bloom.” While installments like season five’s “The Suitor” and season six’s “Nemesis” did much to scratch that itch, the story of the Dark One remained mostly unknown…

And after “Wizard City,” it still remains largely unknown. But that’s OK, because instead of focusing on the character’s history, this special focuses on Peps’ quest to relearn magic at a magic school. Put most simply, this special is largely a fun excuse for the show to riff on Harry Potter and The Owl House-style “magic school hijinks,” and it mostly all works.

The special follows Peps quest to go to WizArts (a definite play on CalArts, the school that Pen Ward and Adam Muto, among many others, went to) so that he can relearn magic and once again become one of the greatest dark wizards of his time. Initially, Peps tries to make friends with cool kid Spader and his posse, but once they learn that Peps is not as talented at magic as they had initially thought, they kick him to the curb. It is at this point that Cadebra, Abracadaniel’s adorkable niece who is fascinated with stage magic, enters the picture. Cadebra tries everything in her power to befriend Peps, but Peps pushes back, since she’s not “cool.” It does not matter, though, because both Peps and Cadebra are sorted into the same “house”—the “Skink House—and are forced to work together.

While Peps and his cohort begin learning more and more complex magic, a secret cult of school professors, led by the otherwise caring Dr. Caledonius, are scheming to resurrect Coconteppi, a powerful dark wizard whose putrid heart has been discovered underneath the school excreting a very powerful ichor. The school cult kidnaps Spader and gives him some of the ichor to drink; they hope that because of his talent, he will be able to house the spirit of Coconteppi. This does not go as planned, and Spader is graphically killed (albeit off screen). (In a more humorous moment, Bufo, the scam wizard from season one’s “Wizard,” also ingests some of the ichor, believing himself powerful enough to handle it, but it kills him.)

Eventually Peps and Cadebra learn what is going on. Dr. Caledonius welcomes Peps, believing that he is strong enough to handle the ichor. When Cadebra’s life is put in danger, Peps reluctantly gives the putrid fluid a swig, which infuses him with the power of Coconteppi. Coconteppi-Peps then kills all the cult members before Cadebra manages to remove the ichor from Peps body. For uncovering a heinous plot, Peps is promoted to the highest house, “Salamander,” but he decides to remain a Skink and learn magic “the hard way” with Cadebra as his friend.

As I mentioned near the start of this review, “Wizard City” spends most of its time riffing on the “magic boarding school” trope, with much of the episode feeling like a light-hearted parody of Harry Potter: The characters, after all, are “sorted” into “houses,” they learn various types of magic from skilled “professors,” and they bunk in different parts of a large castle-like campus. Of course, Harry Potter didn’t invent the idea of a boarding school, but when setting your story in a school for magic, it is very hard not to lean at least somewhat into the Hogwarts relation. And this really is a double-edged sword, for while Harry Potter references can be fun here and there, they can also make the overall story feel like a fanfic parody. This special does a good job focusing more so on the characters rather than the setting, but I won’t lie, at times it did feel as if they show was really trying to make you realize it was making a Harry Potter joke.

Of all the characters introduced in the special, the breakout star is easily Cadebra, voiced by Chloe Coleman. Radiating a sort of Mabel Pines energy, Cadebra is the beam of optimism who shines brightly in an otherwise macabre special. There is something about her plucky personality and sense of wacky individualism that charms the viewer. I appreciate how the show compared and contrasted her with her uncle, the one and only Abracadaniel: like her uncle, Cadebra is a good person who wants to help others, but unlike Abracadaniel, she has a sense of courage and fortitude that results in her taking on a Coconteppi-possessed Peps at the episode’s climax. (Say what you will, Abracadaniel stans, but our favorite custodian would never have done that!) Thanks to her bravery and dedication to Peps, Cadebra is easily the heart of the special.

The episode throws an interesting little curveball into the mix by having the ‘ghost’ of Past Peppermint Butler constantly haunt Peps in the here-and-now. Past Peppermint, it seems, was so determined to become a great wizard, he cursed himself, so that if anything were to go awry, his Past self could materialize and set him straight. It’s confusing, but I do think that mixing the “overbearing parent” trope with a curse is a clever idea; it gives the whole special some dramatic heft. The whole setup is made even funnier by the special’s conclusion: After Future Peppermint Butler is ‘defeated’ and the day is saved, Peps reveals to Cadebra that he still wants to be a great and powerful dark wizard… but he wants to earn that power through hard work and determination. (Peppermint Butler might commune with demons, but he would never sell his soul to one for power; Glob helps those who help themselves, ya know?)

One of the special’s strongest points is its background art. Adventure Time always had some beautiful set pieces, and this special goes above and beyond to give WizArts an ancient sense of grandeur and mystery. Ghostshrimp, a freelance artist who was the show’s lead background designer during seasons 1-4, return for this special as a “visual developer”—basically, he mocked up a bunch of rough designs for the locales, and then the episode’s background artists worked up the final pieces in his style. On his podcast, Ghostshrimp mentioned how hectic he found Adventure Time to be, because he was used to taking his time on pieces. As such, the decision to bring him on for just development was smart, as it allowed him to still come up with iconic background designs while also playing fast and loose with everything. Hopefully the show will continue this approach with the Fionna and Cake miniseries that is coming up. After all, Ghosthsrimp’s style is the look of Adventure Time.

Another strong point for the episode is its voice acting. For one thing, you have your regulars like Tom Kenny and Dana Snyder, and Duncan Trussell, who all give a solid performance. But to voice many of the special’s new characters, the show brought on a bevy of fun actors: Saturday Night Live’s Bill Hader, for instance, is now voicing Bufo, and he does a solid job hamming up his role as the old fogey. And then there’s Toks Olagundoye, whose British accent gives Dr. Caledonius a sense of knowledge and expertise. To my delight and surprise, SungWon Cho, an internet personality and voice actor perhaps better known as ProZD, was tapped to voice Brain Wizard, and he does an excellent job. And finally, Anthony Stewart Head, a very talented actor who I know best as Giles from Buffy the Vampire Slayer, voices Con Wizard, and is even given a fun little ditty to sing. I can safely say that the voice acting in this special is likely the best of the bunch, and it’s obvious that the actors were all having a great time playing their parts.

What drags the whole thing down, in my opinion is the excessive murder. (I joked on Twitter that during the climax of “Wizard City,” it felt like I was watching an Adventure Time-ified version of Invincible!) Infused with the power of Coconteppi, Peps goes on a brutal killing spree, boiling Potable Wizard into steam, zapping Dimension Wizard into another plane of existence, smashing Berdzerd, and—perhaps most graphically—excerebrates (had to look that word up!) Brain Wiz. On Twitter, @sometipsygnostalgic​ argued that while, yes, the scene is startling, it does wonders to transmute “a poor Summer Camp Island knockoff [into] Adventure Time chaos.” The more I think about it, the more I think that’s a fair point; after all, this is hardly the first dark thing that has happened in Adventure Time. But the part that I cannot really stomach is the fact that Spader was murdered for no real reason, and the special ends without anyone really expressing their horror at the situation. Sure, Spader was a schoolyard bully, but he was also a child. And killing a child—either for the drama or the lulz—feels decidedly out of place in an Adventure Time episode. It’s hard to express, but it just felt unnecessarily nihilistic and mean-spirited.

All things considered, I think this was a fun episode, but it was somewhat underwhelming for a ‘finale.’ Much of this is because it had to air after the perfection that was the back-to-back “Obsidian”/”Together Again” wombo combo. But I can’t help but feel like this special just felt a little... off. A little too meanspirited, and it leaned a bit too much on standard tropes. Still, it was a fun spin, and I know that I’ll rewatch it.

Mushroom War Evidence: As Peps rides the bus to school, he passes a bunch of abandoned houses, some of which are buried in the ground. There is an unexploded bomb above the fossilized elephant in the school. Cadebra has a dream that takes place in the ruins of a city.

Final Grade: B+

#adventure time #atimers #atdl #distant lands #adventure time distant lands #wizard city #peps #peppermint butler #abracadaniel #Cadebra #Ghostshrimp #Adam Muto #Hanna K #ProZD

[aspoonofsugar]

Ironwood and Cinder: The Final Word

Cinder: And that’s… checkmate.

The Final Word of the volume is Cinder’s and it is meaningful she says it to Ironwood.

As a matter of fact Ironwood and Cinder are two sides of the same coin on many levels. This is conveyed also structurally.

Volume 7 is mostly about Ironwood’s tragic spiral. We are shown him struggle with his flaw throughout the whole volume, but in the end he loses to it and becomes just as dangerous as Salem:

Oscar: Then you're as dangerous as she is, James.

Not only does volume 8 close with Cinder instead, but it also opens with her:

And it even gives us her backstory:

Why does it happen? And why is Cinder’s final line so important when it comes to her foiling with Ironwood?

GRAVITY

It is not by chance that Watts calls both Ironwood and Cinder out before the climax of respectively volume 7 (Ironwood) and volume 8 (Cinder). This is because, as stated above, volume 7 is Ironwood’s volume, while volume 8 is Cinder’s. So they both are confronted with a truth about themselves and their reaction to it influences their stories in the Atlas arc.

In a sense, even if Watts is the one dangerously hanging over an abyss... it is actually Ironwood and Cinder who are on the brink. They are deciding Watts’s survival, but they are also deciding their own destiny.

They are choosing if to fall because of gravity or if to fly in the sky victorious.

At the same time, the two scenes with Watts show how Cinder and Ironwood are both similar and opposites.

AS ABOVE, SO BELOW

Ironwood and Cinder are nothing, but two products of Atlas’s society.

Ironwood was born at the very top:

Watts: You just stood atop it and called yourself a giant!

Cinder existed at the very bottom:

Watts: You think you're entitled to everything just because you've suffered, but suffering isn't enough! You can't just be strong, you have to be smart! You can't just be deserving, you have to be worthy! But all you have ever been, is a BLOODY MIGRAINE!

Watts is in the middle and he represents the worst traits of both.

He wants everything, just like Cinder:

Ironwood: I gave you everything you could have wanted!

But differently from Cinder it was no true he had nothing. He was successful, had food, clothes and respect. Still, he was never satisfied and ended up disgracing himself in the search of something more.

He also disregards feelings in favor of rationality, just like Ironwood:

Watts: Our tin soldier’s heart has cost him his mind.

And he sees people under him as inherently inferior:

Watts: Yes, yes, please keep your posse in check.

This is why his death is fitting:

Cinder: I merely added more flames to the fires of Atlas.

He burns with Atlas aka the city he wants to destroy, but also a symbol of who he is deep down.

What is more, his death happens specifically because he blindly follows his wishes:

Watts: Oh, believe me, this is everything I've ever wanted.

And because he is outsmarted and manipulated by Cinder:

Cinder: You deserve this, Arthur. We'll be back.

He is proud of his genius and rationality, but in the end he dies because of his feelings of pettiness.

In short, Watts, Cinder and Ironwood represent three social classes of Atlas and how the system corrupts people at every level. In general, all three want to be at the very top, but disreguard and mistreat the ones below.

-This is why Ironwood seeks control even in situations where he is not in charge, like the Vytal Festival. He also challenges Ozpin’s authority and leadership because he is not used not to be the one deciding. At the same time, he is shown ready to discard Mantle in multiple occasions.

-This is why Watts can call out Ironwood’s arrogance without seeing he is exactly the same as him.

-Finally, this is why Cinder lashes out at people she sees as Atlas elites (the Schnees, Ironwood, Watts), but treats those below her just like she was treated:

Emerald: We don't need him! Everything was going fine! (a slap is heard, and she cries out in pain)

Cinder: Do not mistake your place.

Mercury: Oh yeah? Tell that to--

Cinder: Quiet.

THE ENEMIES OF TRUST

Both Ironwood and Cinder’s left arms are artificial. Ironwood’s is mechanical, while Cinder’s is Grimm.

Their respective arms convey opposite approaches to things.

On a more general level, they are respectively linked to Creation (Ironwood’s mechanical arm) and to Destruction (Cinder’s Grimm arm). As a matter of fact a robotic arm is a human creation, while Grimms are nothing, but the symbol of destruction.

On a personal level, their arms hint at the two characters’ opposite personalities.

Ironwood’s arm can’t feel pain.

Cinder’s is instead linked to pain and feelings in different ways:

Raven: Aura can't protect your arm, it's Grimm.

Salem: You chose to disobey my specific instructions just to fail again.

Cinder: She’s back…

Cinder feels great pain whenever her Shadow Hand is cut because she can’t protect it with aura. At the same time, it is used by Salem to torture her. Finally, it links her to Salem to the point that she knows when her Master is back.

In other words, Cinder’s arm lets her feel more, while Ironwood’s lets him feel less.

This difference is mirrored by both the ways Ironwood and Cinder respectively attack Watts and by their semblances:

Ironwood’s Mettle lets Ironwood suppress his own feelings, so that he can pursue any objective, no matter how cruel or immoral it is. It makes him “superhuman”, but in a very negative sense.

Cinder’s Scorching Caress represents Cinder’s explosive emotions. It is a form of self-expression, which is both destructive and self-destructive.

Ironwood’s semblance is about repression, while Cinder’s is about lashing out.

Similarly, Ironwood goes after Watts at the cost of his arm and he ignores the pain he feels:

Watts: I wouldn't do that if I were you. I mean, unless you're hoping to add more metal to that body of yours.

Cinder instead goes after Watts to vent her anger:

Cinder: What do you mean, she'll destroy herself? How am I supposed to take her power if she's dead?!

Both are extremes and both are wrong, as Winter explains:

Winter: But yes Penny, we must still acknowledge our personal feelings, wrestle with them. It ensures us that we’re on the right path. It’s what makes us human.

Ironwood and Cinder should aknowledge their own feelings not to be consumed by them.  It is also the only way for them to truly be humans, not machines or monsters, but simply people.

Both characters almost succeed just before the climax of their respective volumes.

Ironwood tries to open up to others:

And Cinder shows vulnerability:

However, none of them is able to capitalize on this chance for development. This is ironically because of each other:

Cinder messes with Ironwood’s insecurities, while Ironwood’s ultimatum gives Cinder the perfect chance to ignore hers.

The result is that Ironwood goes back to control, while Cinder goes back to manipulation. Both do so because they are unable to trust.

Interestingly, they take after their respective mentors in this.

Ironwood takes after Ozpin:

Ironwood: Did you really think you were the only one who got to work on a new plan after Beacon? WIth Ozpin gone, I needed my own team of people I could trust.

Oscar: General? Earlier, you asked for my advice.

Ironwood: I wanted Ozpin's advice.

Oscar: And his advice probably would've been to keep your secrets.

Cinder takes after Salem:

Salem: When I chose you as my vessel for the Maidens, I put my trust in you. So, I trust that you wouldn’t possibly return to me empty-handed.

Ironwood’s whole struggle in volume 7 is his search for a “new approach”. He wants to be like Ozpin, but better. This is why he founds his own group, but wants to trust the world with the truth about Salem. However, he confuses trust with control.

Cinder instead wants to become just like Salem and suffers when she sees she is not. This is why she collects assets, just like her master. This is also why she does not trust anyone, but manipulates others.

That said, what is the difference between Ironwood’s control and Cinder’s manipulation? It has once again to do with feelings.

Ironwood’s attempt to manipulate others is about suppressing feelings. He uses Atlas’s military hierarchy and social structures to ask for his subordinates’ blind loyalty.

Cinder’s method to control people lies instead in making use of others’ feelings. She uses both wishes and fears to her advantage.

In short, control and manipulation are nothing, but the same inability to trust declined in opposite ways. They are both “enemies of trust”.

This is why both Ironwood and Cinder find a strong enemy and a foil in the character, who embodies friendship in these volumes:

Deep down, Ironwood and Cinder not trusting others is because they fear betrayal:

Cinder: I won’t have to run now.

Rhodes: That’s all you’ll ever do.

Ironwood: I've chased a lot of shadows over the years, always expecting betrayal. But never once did I think it would ever come from you.

However, Penny too is betrayed and mistreated by others:

Penny: I do not like it when friends fight.

Ruby: I know. Yang and I may not agree on how best to save Mantle but-

Penny: No. I mean Winter. The general. They were our friends. But then the Ace Ops attacked you. And the general, he said people were going to die, because of me.

 However, she does not give up on the ideal of a genuine bond:

Attached but not By strings

Still, if Penny is a positive foil to both Ironwood and Cinder, why does she die?

RISK

Weiss: Trust is a risk.  

Yang: Ruby, they’re not called sure things, they’re called risks.

These two lines taken together are why at the end of volume 8 Penny dies, our heroes fall and the manipulative Cinder wins.

It happens to show the main theme of the two Atlas volumes. Trust is not a “sure thing”. It is a risk and it does not always work. Still, it is necessary to trust as it is necessary to take risks:

Yang: You were being optimistic. Look, blind optimism isn’t great, but no optimism means we already lost. We need hope. We need to take risks.

Giving up on trust and risks means giving up on hope. It means to give in to fear.

Still, this does not mean your trust will always be paid back. And it does not mean that the risks you take will always work, even if you come up with a wonderful plan:

Cinder: I knew your plan would be bold, but I never could have predicted all of this...

Sometimes people will betray you:

Sometimes your risk will end up in a fall:

However, it is still worth to trust, even when you have no guarantee it will work:

And sometimes It is even worth to risk the fall because it may lead to people being saved:

This same idea is conveyed also through Penny’s final choice:

Penny: Trust me.

Winter: Thank you for trusting me with this.

Penny dies tragically, but she still manages to pass the Maiden’s power to a person she trusts.

This is especially meaningful because the Winter Maiden power, just like Penny herself, has been subjected to both control and manipulation.

Ironwood does all he can to make sure the power ends up to Winter. At the same time, he is the one most responsible for Penny feeling as nothing, but a robot:

Ironwood: As the official report stated, that footage was doctored. Penny is completely under my control.

Cinder tries to steal the power three times. She also manipulates Penny’s feelings towards her friends:

Cinder: I was hoping your friends would be here. But it looks like they left you to do all the work. You’re just a tool to be used!

In the end, Ironwood treating Penny as a machine (control) and Cinder using Penny’s love for her friends against her (manipulation) are among the psychological factors that lead Penny to be mortally wounded by Cinder.

Still, while dying Penny negates both Ironwood and Cinder and frees the power and herself from both control and manipulation.

The fact she chooses Winter works well to illustrate this.

Winter is the person Ironwood wants as the next Maiden. However, Winter becomes a Maiden not because of Ironwood’s control, but because of Penny’s trust:

Ironwood: So… the destiny I chose for you has arrived.

Winter: You chose nothing. This...was a gift.

Winter is a Schnee, so she represents both what Cinder hates and what she herself wants to be:

Cinder to Winter: You Atlas elites are all the same! You think hoarding power means you’ll have it forever, but it just makes the rest of us hungrier.

Winter is a symbol of Atlas and so she is a reminder to Cinder that Atlas is not really destroyed:

Robyn: What do you think a kingdom is? The people, or just the chunk of land they live on?

Just like Cinder’s past isn’t.

WORTHY

Cinder wants to be worthy. Ironwood wants to be a hero.

Deep down, Ironwood and Cinder want the same thing. They want to be above others. They want to be more than humans.

However, they go at it in opposite ways:

Ironwood: I have sacrificed everything!

Cinder: I want it all...

Ironwood thinks that victory lies in sacrificing everything, while Cinder sees it as taking it all.

These opposite viewpoints mirror their respective social stances.

Ironwood can say he wants to sacrifice everything because he has everything.

Cinder thinks happiness lies in everything because she has nothing:

Cinder: You’re right. Without you I am nothing. But because of you, I am everything.

In the end, Ironwood and Cinder are each other’s true enemies, but they fail to see it and lash out against the wrong people:

Ironwood and Cinder’s respective fight against Winter and Weiss is exactly this.

Ironwood fights a Maiden he sees as an enemy of Atlas, while another Maiden is attacking the people he swore to protect.

Cinder lashes out at Weiss because of her origins, while Weiss has decided to leave her status and money behind to make the right thing.

Still, Ironwood and Cinder are too hypocritical to see the truth. This is why they attack people, who could have helped them, if they were given the chance.

This is also why they receive a warning:

Winter: No, you have sacrificed everyone else!

Winter: You… are going to pay… for everything you’ve done!

Ironwood claims he is ready to sacrifice everything. However, he never sacrifices himself:

In the end, he is unable to sacrifice his life to fight Salem.

Let’s highlight he has nothing to lose by this point. He is falling with Atlas anyway. In his final moments, he is given the chance to prove true to his words:

I would die Without regret, I’d offer up my life With zero reservations I would fly Into the sun If that would keep our dream alive

Instead, he gives up. He has been shooting his allies until the very end, but freezes in front of his enemy.

Cinder thinks she is closer to her final victory, but in the end she has accomplished nothing of what she truly wants.

She wants to kill RWBY, but they are alive. She wants the Maiden powers, but she fails.

At the same time, Cinder is still far away from what she truly needs:

Cinder: You have everything you need?

Watts: Oh, believe me, this is everything I've ever wanted.

She is given a perfect mirror of herself in Watts. Still, instead of seeing it, Cinder uses his flaw, which is her same flaw, to kill him. Watts’ wants lead to his death and the same thing might happen to Cinder if she does not stop herself in time.

Finally, there is this:

Salem: This game is not yours to win, Cinder, it’s mine. Just because you’re more valuable to me than a pawn, does not make you a player. Everything is already in motion. All you need concern yourself with is your ability to act when I tell you to.

Ironwood and Cinder share a chess motif.

Ironwood thinks of himself as a player and specifically as Salem’s opponent.

Cinder is instead told she is no player.

However, in the end, Ironwood becomes a mere pawn to the point that all Watts has to do is to open his cell to be sure he is going to unwillingly aid in Cinder’s plan.

What is more, he is so fixated on Salem that he fails to aknowledge the people below him. This is why his true opponent is a slave that Atlas exploited.

Cinder frames herself as a player instead. She is the one who truly makes the first move against Ironwood and ultimately she is the one who defeats both him and our protagonists. Finally, she is the one who calls checkmate.

Still, is she really playing her own game?

In the end, the one who gets what she wants is not Cinder, but Salem:

And all she has to do to obtain it is one small move:

Salem: And I’ve realized, it’s all my fault. You’ve fought your whole life unwaveringly for what you want and here I am holding you back instead of lifting you up.

While Cinder is once again letting her talent be exploited by those above her. She is choosing to be Salem’s Queen instead than a player of her own life.

She is the Black Queen defeating the White King, but nothing more.

#rwby #rwby meta #rwby vol8 #rwby vol7 #cinder fall #james ironwood #my meta

[queenlilith43]

The Eldest Curses

So we know of the eldest curses. We know they are the oldest child of a Prince of Hell. But what do they do? What powers do they hold? And how far do they have to fall?

In this post I'll go over some theories and all the information we know about them, confirmed eldest curses, and their respective parents.

I'm sorry if my hate for Asmodeus comes out, but as my friend @patalliumapples said, "You hate Asmodeus so much and it’s so funny to me. Like I hate him too but it seems like he personally murdered your family and it’s so funny."

Tags: @apple-bottom-jeansx @the-blackdale @murderbabies @unorganisedbookshelf @revati3008 @patalliumapples @tenacioushubb @hardlymatters @pjo-tsc-trc-otherthingstoo if you gave me a theory idea you'll be tagged later in the post.

What We Know

Eldest curses are the oldest children of any given Prince of Hell at a moment. So if a Prince of Hell has seven kids alive, the oldest one will be his eldest curse. However, this is unlikely, because they die easily. The magic is too much for them to handle.

There are two confirmed eldest curses living right now: Magnus Bane and Tessa Gray.

Magnus Bane

Age: Anywhere between 380-400 years old

Parent: Asmodeus

Powers: He's very powerful, but any specific powers based on his demon parent? Not really. Unless you count sexy as a power.

Contact with Demon Parent: Magnus has met Asmodeus several times. He summoned him when he was very young, and the regretted it. Then there was the Crimson Hand, his little demon-worshipping cult. Magnus ran into Asmodeus again in The Red Scrolls of Magic and City of Heavenly Fire, but hasn't been under his sway . . . Yet.

Tessa Gray

Age: 147-ish, born in 1862

Parent: Belial

Powers: Tessa, being half Shadowhunter, is special. She doesn't have many regular warlock powers, but she can shapeshift into anyone she likes. However, after absorbing the power of the angel Ithuriel, it's harder for her to change. It's also not a good idea for her to shapeshift when she's pregnant, as found out in Ghosts of the Shadow Market.

Contact with Demon Parent: She has not talked with Belial. Her children, James and Lucie, have had contact several times throughout the Last Hours, but she herself has not talked to Belial. Belial did consider possessing her, but between Ithuriel protecting her and his sexism, it's unlikely.

The Other Stuff

Eldest curses are supposed to be powerful. They're literally demon royalty, and Magnus and Tessa's uncle is Lucifer. Just think on that.

So I'm just gonna talk about some stuff Asmodeus brought up in The Red Scrolls of Magic. I was going to analyze some quotes but it just was taking me too long and I was getting too angry at Asmodeus. My solution is to just do a brief summary of what he said.

Eldest curses have some powers. We don't what, but I can gather they were made to rule. (On iron thrones as Asmodeus said, which is very specific)

And Asmodeus sure loves his. Why? Because he's a manipulative son of a bitch that's why. (The hate is strong right now.)

Asmodeus has had a lot of kids, because he's the demon of lust, but Magnus is very powerful. He's strong, and Asmodeus wants to mess with him to take control of him.

And now onto the theories!

Theories

And the crackpot clowning starts here.

@the-blackdale came up with the theory that some ✨ necromancy ✨ will be in order and Magnus dies at some point, but comes back to life in TBVOTD.

@murderbabies suggested that to summon Lucifer needs blood to be summoned. Blood of an eldest curse, most likely, because we know warlock blood has some powers. I really don't think it would rivers of blood, but enough to draw a small sigil. (As we know from Chain of Iron all the Princes have a sigil that might be used to summon them.)

@patalliumapples and I have the headcanon Raynor is actually Sammael's son, but it's unlikely to actually be canon. Still, a nice thought.

I think Aldous Nix, the warlock from The Bane Chronicles who making a Portal to Pandemonium, is an eldest curse. Maybe Belphegor. He is dead now, but before that, he was at least 1000 years old. That was before Sammael did his little Incursion thing, and that means there had to be a very powerful demon to get to the surface to be his father. So possibly an eldest curse.

Basically assume every warlock is an eldest curse unless confirmed otherwise.

So combining the two theories from @the-blackdale and @murderbabies is that maybe the death or at least one eldest curse would be needed to get Luci back into this world. They paint a sigil with that blood, and bring Lucifer in through it. Not sure when necromancy would be in order, but maybe Asmodeus would bring his son back to show him what they had done.

@revati3008 brought up that maybe Max is an eldest curse who was placed strategically so Magnus would adopt him. And who did this? Asmodeus. Because he wanted to manipulate his child.

Just imagine that. Asmodeus holding the knowledge of their child's parentage over Magnus and Alec's heads. Sounds like something he would do. This would also be even more causally cruel if Max is an eldest curse, because most of those die under the weight of their own power.

But that's super-likely because of a vision Magnus had in TLBOW and also based solely on vibes.

And then the good ol' key theory. @tenacioushubb is the mastermind of this one.

The core idea of this theory is that the eldest curses are analogous to keys. And these keys are needed to unchain Lucifer from a prison. This theory does require Luci to be chained up, but this could explain why demons are coming from Pandemonium in the first place. Lucifer being chained up (probably in Pandemonium) would be the source of all the demon energy. Him coming to our world would be the "wicked powers" aspect of that series.

Also, as @patalliumapples pointed out to me, maybe this how Asmodeus is going to use Magnus. Though this stems from something I noticed before, and ties into something I call the "Castle Theory" which is legit just based off some lyrics from Halsey's Castle.

Sit down and grab some popcorn this one's complicated and very crack pot.

So here are the lyrics that inspired me:

I'm headed straight for the castle

They wanna make me their queen

And there's an old man sitting on the throne

That's saying that I probably shouldn't be so mean

I'm headed straight for the castle

They've got the kingdom locked up

And there's an old man sitting on the throne

That's saying I should probably keep my pretty mouth shut

Straight for the castle

I've said before this song has the same vibes as Clary going into Edom to rescue Jocelyn and the others. This will come up later.

Focusing on Magnus-he already was going to be made to be a king. In one of his dreams in TLBOW, Magnus dreamt of ruling a ruined world. Those chains on his arms from the thorn were there, too.

In The Red Scrolls of Magic while Asmodeus was info-dumping on us, he mentioned the eldest curses were "meant for thrones of iron." Which was so random. Why specify iron? We all know it's deadly to faeries, what does he want?

So I looked up what iron is supposed to do in the Shadowhunters Codex because I didn't know if there was anything else it did. Whelp, turns out a nickel-iron alloy called meteoric iron (normally found in meteors) is a good magic conductor, along with most iron being toxic to the fae.

And my mind was spinning. Rushing to check the Bane Chronicles, I looked at what the Hotel Dumort was built of. It actually was demonic metal, but I'd you had enough iron that can conduct magic,

So if Magnus sits on a throne of iron with enough demonic magic in him, it could unlock Lucifer down there.

Another theory that a few people have brought up is Magnus being possessed by a demon. I feel like it would be a demon Asmodeus sent to posses Magnus, not himself, but at least Asmodeus is smart. He has some sort of brain, unlike Belial, who just acts like he does, and then fails.

Last theory is something I'll do another post on because it needs a LOT of research to back it up.

This theory is that the eldest curses are similar to the Nephilim from the Bible.

These Nephilim were the children of fallen angels on earth. Same as the eldest curses. Though these Nephilim were giants, hundreds of feet tall.

But in one of Magnus's many visions, he dreamt he was tall. And this was after sitting on that throne, after ruling his own world.

Again, more research needed, but I think it could explain their power.

Feel free to add your own theories and thoughts! If I missed any canon info that could be helpful also tell me and I'll edit the post so it's included.

#tsc #magnus bane #tessa gray #twp #the wicked powers #the eldest curses #tec #magnus lightwood bane #max lightwood bane #the red scrolls of magic #the lost book of the white #the shadowhunters chronicles #the shadowhunter chronicles

[washymylifeaway]

Haikyuu fanfic recs but it’s just more of my faves pt 2 LOL

Hiya loves! My other fic rec (linked here) did well enough that I decided to make a pt 2 :D Here are some more of my faves that I didn’t get to recommend last time!!!! Again the rules are the same, two per ship and no cp (but of course I AM SUFFERING UGH) :’(((

As always, pls check WARNINGS, TAGS, and SUMMARIES for fics before reading and make sure you’re taking care of yourselves (since mental health is key!) Stay healthy loves <3

IwaOi (I made a top ten linked here):

darlin', your head's not right by aruariandance (T) 13.6k // AJKFFJA THIS ONE!!!! I really love this one and unconfident Oikawa is THE MOVE. I really liked the portrayal of Oikawa in this one, it’s done SO WELL :D Everything about this fic is amazing and the ending was SO CUTE,,, I love recursive endings!!!!!

nevermind (but i mind) by seabear (M) 9.9k // TELEPATHY. Okay prefacing this with the fact that there is SMUT in this, so be careful as you read! But the communication in this one? Nonexistent. And like Iwa’s mom? The mfing mvp. It’s a great fic and the ending was FLUFF.

KuroKen:

Addiction and Attachment by eevaeon (T) 41.8k // I’VE BEEN WAITING TO REC THIS OMG. You want a Kenma taking care of Kuroo? HERE IT IS :DDDD The feels in this one are high and it’s just SO GOOD. And they’re so cute the fluff is just so fluffy in this :D

Step by Step by dgalerab (M) 14.7k // inclusivity!!! I really like this one and it’s another where Kuroo gets kinda comforted by Kenma and Kuroo’s a bit desperate in this as well LOL. Also some BokuAka plot and poor Akaashi with the shirt omg. There’s some homophobia and smut so be careful as you read! 

BokuAka:

In the Absence of Light by meeks00 (E) 50.7k // WITCHES AND WITCH HUNTERS LETS GOOOOO. I really love this one because 1. Akaashi and Kenma’s friendship is one of my favorite hc! And 2. because of MAGIC AHHH! It’s a whole mess, but it’s such a good fic omg. CHECK TAGS AND WARNINGS cause fighting and SMUT!

Karma by dgalerab (T) 9k // PETTY AKAASHI? Sign me up. But no really, I love how Akaashi is in this fic and I think he’s characterized SO well! Also I too would get distracted as Bokuto does yoga with me ahaha. Anyway, I love the dynamics between everyone in this fic and it’s CUTE.

DaiSuga:

butterfly in the subway by bigspoonnoya (T) 62.8k // please, I’ve said other fics are a big mess BUT this one might just take the cake. It’s a mixture of ships with DaiSuga being the main one, so read it even if you don’t love DaiSuga (and then you’ll love them LOL). It’s like everything that could go wrong, goes wrong but the AsaNoya in this was SO cute!

you can only take what you can carry by skittidyne (T) 4.2k // Suga is strong. That’s it. That’s literally the whole fic LMAO. But no seriously, I wish I could’ve been there in person to ogle at the muscles cause like think about it. ANyway, Yachi is best. (if this made no sense, go read the fic LOL)

KyouHaba:

if not, winter by knightswatch (M) 54k // YES THIS FIC. THIS ONE RIGHT HERE. I love the development of their relationship,,, IT’S SO GOOD. Like when our boy Yahaba goes on that really friendly field trip and Kyoutani takes matters into his own hands? UGH YES. And when they visit? CUTE OMG. Yes this fic is it.

Isolated Parts by darkmagicalgirl (T) 3.3k // I love this fic cause old men KyouHaba are funny (fight those refs) and I love the nonlinear plot. It really adds another layer to the fic itself, and slowly unraveling the plot through the different years was SO IUAHFJF. I really loved it and piecing everything together :’)

MatsuHana:

Magical Mishaps and How to Deal by plumtrees (M) 10.9k // I lost this fic once and I searched for it FOR THE LONGEST TIME. But that’s cause I wanted to reread this masterpiece. IT’S SO FUNNY AND CUTE AND DOMESTIC AND UGH. Also the small angst made me SO SAD. But the ENDING? THE KISSES AHHHHHHH. (I’m yelling a lot BUT that’s cause I really love this fic <3333)

hang out fall in love by carafin (T) 8.6k // I love the Makki hates Mattsun initially but then falls for the irresistible charm he posses trope. It might be my favorite trope for MatsuHana specifically LOL. Like I really love this fic and it has MAGIC. It’s like a magical version of the VA one LOL. But like no radio shows or reunited best friends in this one :(

SakuAtsu:

the 28 postcards you left me by wheelspokes (T) 8.3k // Okay the whole concept of this fic made me laugh ngl. Like I hate exes to lovers but this concept made me read it and I don’t regret it. I felt Atsumu’s panic when he sent the first one and then later LOL. I loved Omi’s side too OMG, also there’s a timeline at the end :D

the home we built in hell by awkwardedgeworth (T) 5k // I love this fic. I love the execution of this fic. It’s written so well and the development they go through IS SO GOOD. Like the plot is just AMAZING and I literally cannot express in words how much I adore this fic. PLEASE READ IT! But be mindful of the tags FOR SURE!

SunaOsa:

Even forever is too short of a time with you by miyarinnnn (T) 53.8k // C U T E!!!! I really like this one and the way it went through all the time from the beginning. Technically this is the second fic and you SHOULD read the first one! But I loved seeing the references again and being able to read this from Osamu’s POV. I liked how it went in depth into everything,,, IT’S SO GOOD UGH.

Heart Reign by tookumade (series) 42.3k // ngl, I hate the second fic cause it makes me so angry AHHHHH. JK but seriously, it made me angry. Like my favorite is the last one (for obvious reasons), but every time I reread this series, I skip the second one cause I don’t want to GO THROUGH THE EMOTIONS. AGAIN. Like I hate Chuo now AHHHH. But read this series cause it’s AMAZING and makes me happy. The running and catching was the perfect touch to the end of the first fic and there’s a pov swap (the fourth one!) but I love the reminiscing in the third one too :D (but like I said the fifth one is my favorite!!!) 

(Also cause I can’t help myself, if you want another one I love that I’ve recommended before by tookumade, but not for spring to well up is literally my favorite fic of ALL TIME. Like out of all the fics I’ve read, still will be forever in love with this one ok bye. post where I yell about how much I love this fic linked HERE)

Random:

In Good Faith We Swap Our Aces by WInger (G) 15.1k // what’s a post without a chaotic fic? This is just a meme fic, essentially. It’s so funny and all the aces stories made me laugh like,,,, Yeah it’s literally just a crossover event with the schools and it’s just super lighthearted so I liked it LOL.

#iwaoi #kuroken #bokuaka #daisuga #kyouhaba #matsuhana #sakuatsu #sunaosa #haikyuu fanfic rec #haikyuu fic recs #hq fic rec #haikyuu!! #anime #manga #I love these fics #I would die for these fics #like #I would let them kill me #im not kidding #i might like this one more than my first one #or maybe not #but just know #that all of these are so good #omg #these fics live in my head rent free #haikyuu #hq

[monstersandmaw]

Male ice dragon x cursed female reader (nsfw)

Edit which I’m including in all my works after plagiarism and theft has taken place: I do not give my consent for my works to be used, copied, published, or posted anywhere. They are copyrighted and belong to me.

This is a one-off special story that I wanted to write as a huge huge thank you to a very generous person who supported me on Patreon and also on ko-fi. I don't normally do this, and although this is not a commission, I did chat with them about what they would like, and I've wanted to write an ice dragon for a long time, so that worked for both of us! Thank you, 'The Silent Pariah'! Hope you enjoy it! It's been on Patreon for a week, and went down really well, so it’s time to share it here!

Content: reader is cursed to turn into a more monstrous form at night, and is locked away in a tower, guarded by an ice dragon. There's a bit of a misunderstanding, some angst, a bit of fluff, and some smut. Words: 5124

Dusk drifted down around the stones of the castle, bringing with it that daily, familiar crawling under your skin. Night was a time for monsters and shadows, for creatures less than human, and for hiding away, but you welcomed it with open arms as you had for years.

Your bones started to grow warm, your nerves ringing and prickling, and you knew it wouldn’t be long now.

Turning your back on the courtyard of the deserted castle, you left the balcony and made your way inside through the beautiful, hand carved doorway and into the bedchamber beyond. Sliding your dress off your shoulders, you stepped out of your clothes and felt the change sweeping up inside you, rising like a flood of unbridled power and raw joy. Laughing, you bowed forwards like a supplicant at a shrine, and when you straightened no more than a few minutes later, breathing hard and sweating, the creature that blinked its reptilian eyes back at you from the mirror on the far wall was not the nobleman’s daughter with the blood of kings flowing through her veins.

Blueish black, scaled skin covered your cheeks, the delicate scales leading your gaze towards pointed ears, just barely visible through the thick hair that fell around your now inhuman face. Blinking slowly as your gold, crackle-glazed eyes readjusted, you rolled your shoulders and flexed your taloned hands. With skin the colour of shadows at midnight, and a spine-studded whip of a tail, you slid on a simple linen tunic and turned for the spiral staircase.

Outside, through the walls of the castle, you could hear the enormous wing beats of the only other soul who lived in this vast castle, each flex of his wing strong as a storm wind as he came back to his roost at sunset.

“There you are,” came a deep, sonorous rumbling voice as you stepped out into the evening air, still revelling in the change.

Looking like a thousand shards of moonlight, the dragon adorned the crumbling curtain wall of the castle, delicately perching there with the grace of an ornamental bird.

“Irien,” you smiled. “Good day?”

Polite as ever, he inclined his head, slowly blinking sapphire blue eyes and smiling softly to reveal a maw full of deadly teeth. The dragon stretched out one of his elegant, muscular forelegs and climbed down from the wall, over the old stable block, and into the courtyard like a cat slinking down a flight of steps. His ivory talons barely made a whisper on the slate roofs of the tumble-down old buildings, and with his silky-white wings tucked neatly against his scaled back, he flowed like quicksilver.

“Mmm, yes,” he purred, lowering his head almost to the ground in greeting and closing his eyes again as you ran your hands over the glass-hard scales of his face. Each one was the size of your palm there, but as they slid further down his glacially pale body, they grew large as your whole hand, some even bigger than that. “So warm,” he laughed, nuzzling your fingers playfully and breathing his icy breath against your fingers.

“I’m not that warm. It’s not my fault you’re basically an icicle,” you snorted and he laughed, drawing his neck up like a swan.

Suddenly he scowled and turned serious, his whole body tensing.

“Company?” you asked.

You’d been through this charade together before, and something always sank a little in your chest when you thought about what the arrival of a knight and his little posse might mean. Would they have some magic with them this time that negated the ageless magic of the dragon? Some spear sharp enough to pierce his scales? Some trick he’d never heard of? Perhaps a ballista borrowed from the dragon hunters of the south? Would this be the day that your curse would be broken and you’d have to leave the relative freedom of your castle for the gilded cage of marriage?

Irien looked back at you, his eyes hard and stern as he watched your internal struggle play out in a series of scowls across your face. “Same as usual?” he asked.

“Drive them away,” you snarled. “I have no interest in breaking this curse so I can go and live like a brood mare until I produce the requisite number of appropriately-gendered offspring, thank you.”

With a savage snarl, he beat his wings, once, twice, and launched himself into the air. His ensuing war-scream could have split the night sky in two and it made your ears ring and your vision blur.

Irien was relatively young for a dragon but he was still nearly a hundred years old, and there wasn’t a trick or strategy he hadn’t yet encountered from some upstart young knight, hoping to win fame and fortune at the end of a lance. Oh, and the chance to break your curse. Somehow that always seemed to be an afterthought with these men.

“No one ever bothers to ask if I even want ‘rescuing’,” you muttered bitterly as you watched Irien sail away like a galleon on the unseen currents of air.

He circled the central tower of the old elven castle once to get a measure of how many there were, before spiralling down in a whirling corkscrew, breath blazing shards of ice down on the unfortunate troop somewhere beyond your view below. It wasn’t that you didn’t feel sorry for the way they died - at least it was quick - but you couldn’t help the sour sting of spite that lanced through you whenever Irien announced that there was another lot at the abandoned castle’s gates. Your parents still hadn’t given up on ridding the family of the stain of your curse.

Irien was back within five minutes, landing gracefully beside you, breathing hard from the exertion of flying and drawing on his reserves to create the ice-laced breath inside him.

“Were there many this time?”

He shook his head. “Only six in total.”

“Banners?”

“Grey and yellow field with a black raven.”

You turned away in disgust. “Those were Halvard’s men,” you said. “My father’s closest adviser.” Lifting your shadowy palm, you curled your fingers and inspected the black claws before turning your hand over and watching the way the moonlight glinted on the leathery scales on the back of your hand.

Monstrous. Vile. Cursed.

Lock her away!

True love’s kiss! The only way to break it!

Dragonskeep is the only place for her now. She cannot be seen.

The shame of our family…

Irien’s soft, concerned rumble behind you drew you back from your ragged collection of memories and you turned with a half smile. “I pity you sometimes, you know?” you sighed.

“Me?” he asked with a soft chuckle, falling into step beside you as you wandered off, vaguely thinking of heading towards the rambling rose gardens at the back of the castle. “Why would you pity me? You’re the one locked in here with a dragon who keeps eating the men who come to rescue you.”

“True. I used to think you were no better than them,” you admitted. “Those first few years after they dumped me here…”

Since then, you thought he’d rather come to think of you as part of the castle furniture, or even just another thing in his hoard to guard and protect. It was better than nothing, you supposed, and you had the books in the old elven library for company, and the vegetable garden at the back that you’d been restoring since you were sixteen, and a rather impressive number of stone sculptures ranging from the ‘uniquely abstract’ to something halfway decent. The masons who had abandoned the stone workshops in the gardens of the castle had left their tools behind, like children’s toys abandoned.

He scowled, clearly a little affronted, and shuffled his wings like a chilly bird. “Why? Have I ever given you reason to think badly of me?”

You stopped and raised an eyebrow at him. “You accepted their gold and gems easily enough when they showed up on your doorstep with a newly-cursed thirteen year old and struck whatever bargain it was with you to keep me here,” you pointed out. It felt so long ago now, but you’d never forget the first time you’d seen him. You’d burst into tears and begged your parents not to abandon you here.

Irien had the good grace to look embarrassed at that, turning his snowy head away and grunting awkwardly. “I… Well, I did, yes. But when I asked why they wanted me to take a girl under my protection ‘until such time as her true love can break the curse’, I have to say I was frankly appalled.”

Something ugly twisted inside you at his words. Perhaps it was the recent reminder of the world’s disgust at your ‘condition’, and their determination to change you back, but hot outrage boiled up inside you at his words. “Appalled? So you do think the way they do?”

“What?”

“This!” you blurted, halting and angling your face so that the moonlight glinted on the scales there and on the jaw full of fangs. You stared him down with blazing, inhuman, yellow eyes. “You do think this is disgusting, just the way they do?”

“I thought you didn’t care,” he replied haughtily. “I thought you didn’t care about the curse at all.”

“I don’t!” you practically shrieked. “But I do care about -” you cut off suddenly, feeling as though the ground were rocking beneath you. All these years, he’d just been tolerating your company because of the regular shipments of diamonds and cut gemstones that your parents added to his vault of hoarded wealth in an attempt to keep all but the most determined suitors at bay.

“Care about what?” Irien asked in a softer voice.

“What would you know?” you hissed, turning away and marching towards the tower where he couldn’t enter without bringing the whole lot down around him. “You’re made of ice anyway.”

You left Irien standing in the courtyard and marched up the stairs back to your chambers. You heard Irien lingering in the courtyard, but eventually he took wing and left the castle for his preferred roost on the cliff just above it. It was a long time before you got to sleep that night.

When dawn came the next day, you didn't bother getting out of bed til late in the day, and you clung to the shadows of the library instead of going out to tend to the garden. It was a warm day, and the plants would need a water, but you just couldn’t face meeting Irien now. For all the time that you’d been here, you’d always assumed that he’d seen past the effects of the curse.

It had taken you almost a year not to be afraid of him, but as the months had ticked by after that, and he’d shown you the castle grounds and how to take care of the abandoned elven fortress; how to feed yourself and even how to read ancient elven so that you could access the rest of the books in the library; you’d come to think of him as more of a guardian than a guard. Had he just been humouring the cursed little girl all these years, despite the fact that you were a woman grown now?

Late in the afternoon, just as you started to feel restless again with the gradual sinking of the sun, a faint tapping reached your ears, coming from the far end of the library. The room stretched the full length of one of the newer wings of the castle complex, with light flooding in on either side through huge windows, and at the far end it terminated in a wide balustraded balcony where former scholars would no doubt have gone to get some air during their studies.

You poked your head out from behind the bookshelf where you’d been studying best way to rid a certain garden herb of aphids, and squinted along the clear aisle between the rows of shelves. There, at the balcony at the far end, you could just glimpse Irien, gently tapping a claw on the glass. He was far too large to fit his body onto the terrace, but he could perch elegantly on the rim like a butterfly on a teacup.

Grinding your teeth, you fleetingly considered simply ignoring him, but in the end you straightened and dumped the book on the floorboards. Grim-faced, you marched up the length of the room and opened the leaded-glass door at the far end, coming to a halt in the centre of the balcony with crossed arms.

“I think,” Irien carefully began the moment you were outside, “That we may have had a misunderstanding yesterday.”

Your scowl deepened.

“Hear me out?” he asked, clearly well aware of your tendency to bolt at the first sign of discord.

Reluctantly, you nodded. As far as you knew, he’d never lied to you before.

Out here in the fading sunshine, with the low light flashing in prismatic ripples along those pearlescent scales, he looked… Frankly, he looked like a dream, and something ached inside you the longer you gazed at him. The graceful lines of his lithe, powerful body, the delicate, leathery membrane of his white wings, his ivory claws, the crystal spikes that adorned his head like a crown and continued down his lissom neck to his shoulders, only to start up again at the root of his tail and end in a fractured cluster of crystals around the tip of his tail; everything about him spoke of elder magic and of something ancient, something lost and forgotten from another age, despite his relative youth. He was intoxicating.

With a great inhale as if for courage, he began by apologising. “I’m sorry that what I said came out so wrongly yesterday,” he said. “I didn’t mean that you are appalling in any way. What has always appalled me, however, is the fact that your parents were prepared to abandon their own child to the dubious care of a dragon, and lock her away in an old elven stronghold for something that wasn’t her fault or doing in the first place.”

“Oh.” Well… when he put it that way…

“Oh,” he laughed. “I thought you might know me a little better than that after so much time together…” he added, tone bordering on huffy and petulant.

Even you had to admit that it was true. “Yeah,” you hedged. “I… I thought I did too. Maybe that was why I was so shocked. I’m sorry too… I was still in a strange mood after the soldiers came and I let it get in the way and took what you said the wrong way.”

Irien smiled gently and rumbled a slow, almost juddering exhale that you’d always found strangely attractive. In fact, you nearly missed what he said because your attention was focused on the sound. “I promise that what I said to you all those years ago still stands… the time I found you crying on the roof of the keep.”

Your lips gave a feeble twitch at that. He’d had to fly you down because you’d been too scared to climb. “And what is that?” you demanded though you recalled it perfectly well. Your eyes glittered as the mood shifted palpably between you, both tangibly relieved to be sliding back into your familiar repartee and banter, almost as if you’d not fallen out at all.

Catching the look in your eye, he gave another half-laugh. “That if you like the way you are, then it seems pretty futile to me to try to change you against your will. And personally,” he added, lowering his head a little and turning a tad bashful, “I think you’re beautiful whether the sun is up or down.”

The churning in your stomach that had been gnawing away at you since the previous evening suddenly stilled, and you smiled. “Really? I mean… it doesn’t bother you at all?”

Irien rolled his lovely blue eyes. “Not in the slightest. If anything, your ‘cursed’ form is… well…” He bustled and flustered a little with his wings, turning his gaze away.

That was a surprise. “Is what, Irien?”

“You’re stronger and faster like that; your eyes work better in the dark, and your hands seem to borrow a bit of inspiration from my kind,” he said, holding up one ivory-clawed hand so that the sunlight danced off his own talons for a moment. “And you have a tail…” he croaked.

“Sounds like you’re trying to tell me you’ve got a crush on my cursed self,” you snorted in disbelief, taking a few steps over to the balcony and resting your forearms on it. When he didn’t answer immediately, you shot him a sidelong look. “Irien?”

“I… have tried to tell myself that we are victims of circumstance… That… what I have come to feel for you is only to be expected when two souls are locked away in close quarters with each other for so long, but…” He paused and shrugged as he returned your look askance and exhaled. “Alas, I remain unconvinced.”

“Wait, is that your way of saying you do have a crush on me after all?”

He scoffed, frustrated with himself, and snapped, “When you put it in those terms, it sounds somewhat… cheap and insincere.”

His fingers flexed on the stonework, talons grinding small indents into it and sending a tiny trickle of finely-ground dust to the tiled floor of the balcony. Reaching one hand out you placed it over the leathery scales on his hand - really his foreleg - and squeezed. It was like squeezing stone, but he clearly felt the impact because he jolted a little in surprise and slid a foot down the wall from his perch. His wings flapped instinctively to keep himself in place and you almost laughed.

“So your feelings for me aren’t cheap and insincere then?”

“No,” he growled, and then with a little more grace he sighed. “No, not at all. I can’t stop thinking about you. Whenever I see someone with their troops tramping up to the gate, it’s not my hoard I think to protect.” He turned his head and blinked quietly at you. “It’s you.”

Something caught in your throat at that and tears prickled your eyes. “Irien…”

“Mmm?” he rumbled.

“Will you fly me somewhere?”

“Anywhere. Where would you like me to take you?”

Your eyes drifted over the rambling castle grounds, bathed in the golden light of early evening. Of course, now that you knew he truly cared for you, perhaps you could persuade him to fly you anywhere in the world, although it wasn’t particularly safe for his kind out there. People built cruel ballistae with bolts as thick as tree trunks to fell dragons from the sky like downed swans, but in these parts, he assured you he was safe enough.

When you didn’t answer him immediately, he rumbled your name and lowered his white muzzle to the balustrade, resting it there and watching like a patient hound while you decided. You placed your fingers on his nose and felt the chilly, frosty breath wash over them. The sheer steadiness of his presence was almost overwhelming, like he had his own gravity and was drawing you in and holding you there. You found both of your hands going to his face and suddenly you were leaning over him and sobbing.

“Hey,” he murmured, bringing one wingtip carefully to touch your shoulder. “Hey, what’s wrong?”

You sniffed but the surging emotions refused to let you talk. It was too much. After a lifetime knowing you’d been abandoned here for who and what you were, to have the unwavering acceptance of the only being in the world who had shown you true respect and kindness… it left you spinning.

His pale hand closed around your waist and he pushed off the tower with you delicately in his grasp. You’d done this before, though not often, and the thrilling swoop in your stomach chased most of your tears away, leaving room for little else but wonder in your heart as the world spread out beneath you like a patchwork quilt.

Irien didn’t tell you where he was headed, and you found you didn’t care where he took you. He climbed higher into the hazy, lavender sky above, and soared over the castle wall and out into the pastures beyond where deer grazed and occasionally the massive mountain sheep would come down to enjoy respite in the warmer valley in the winter. Out beyond the open, untamed fields, a huge, glittering lake sparkled, and he seemed to be making for it as he glided along on unseen thermals.

The sun had just begun to kiss the mountain tops to the west, gilding a line of fire along their silhouettes, when he landed on the quartz pebbles of the lake shore, their colour almost the same as his own white scales. He set you down on the grassy bank just above the beach and stepped back.

“Better?” he asked and you nodded.

“Yeah, I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be,” he replied, bringing his head back and nuzzling your stomach affectionately, blue eyes rolling closed.

As your hands traced the contours of his massive head, he sank his body down to lie on the pebbles and curled his tail around his legs like a cat. The rumbling of his breathing soon deepened until you had to giggle. “Are you purring? Do dragons purr?”

“Only when we’re - oh - really… ahh…” he faltered as your fingertips skirted around the base of one of his crystalline horns which was, apparently, extremely sensitive.

“Really what, Irien…”

“Ah…” he gasped as you repeated the gesture. “Oh… gods that’s good…” he blurted.

You kept doing it until he rolled onto one side, breathing quickening as a tangible shiver passed along his spine. “I didn’t know you were so sensitive,” you murmured, leaning down to plant a kiss on his smooth cheek.

Half-twitch and half-spasm, his right foreleg raked a huge channel through the pebbles as he groaned long and low, claws flexed.

“Should I stop?” you teased.

“Up to you,” he rasped. “But…”

“But what…?”

He seemed to be having difficulty stringing a sentence together, which was amusing. The fact that he was so affected by your touch was definitely doing things to you as well, and as you felt the sun going down, you realised you were going to shift soon.

“But what, Irien?”

His jaws opened and he began to pant, little crystals of ice forming along his canines and over the pebbles of the beach where his head lay pillowed. His belly was pale as moonlight, the iridescent sheen only beginning on the larger scales of his sides and back, and as you gazed down the length of his body, you saw that the small slit in the sheath on his lower abdomen, almost between his legs, had begun to glisten with a pearlescent fluid. It looked swollen too, and as you caressed that sensitive spot on his head again, you watched as the very tip of his cock began to emerge from the sheath.

“You want me to keep going?” you asked, feeling your own skin heating up, partly from the impending change and partly because the sight of him getting so worked up was affecting you too.

“I didn’t… bring you here for… this,” he panted. “But I won’t stop you if you want to.”

“Do you want it though?” you asked, stepping back as your bones began to creak and shift. “Shit, sorry I’m… I’m shifting…” you gasped, reeling backwards and landing hard on the ground behind you. “I thought I had a few more minutes…”

It didn’t take long, and when you looked up, he was watching you with his steady, sapphire gaze. “Alright?” he asked. “I’ve never seen you change.”

With your new ‘monstrous’ eyes, you had an even better view of him. Where your human sight saw gentle rainbows shimmering on his scales, now you saw refracted light glittering and shattering off his spines, and the sheer depth of colour in his eyes was phenomenal. “How about another kind of ‘first’?” you asked, voice huskier now, and you began to slide the simple shirt up over your head.

The heat of his gaze made you preen a little as you revealed your dark blue, scaled body to him. His jaw parted again, mouth hanging open softly, and his tongue was visible too behind that row of enormous teeth. He was tasting your arousal on the air, you realised, like a predator.

“Gods, that’s hot,” you hissed and he tilted his head, catlike. “I want you, Irien. Is… Is that wrong?”

He shook his head. “If it’s what you feel, then it’s not wrong. I want you too, though I fear I might break you.”

“We’ll have to get creative,” you grinned, feeling your tail lashing behind you playfully.

“Look at you,” he snarled, rearing up a little like a cat about to pounce; a cat made of glass and porcelain.

His cock was not yet fully unsheathed, but you could see it - dark blue at the base, the colour of the heart of the lake behind him, with paler ridges that looked extremely inviting, and fading to pure white at the tip. It twitched and drooled under your gaze and he grunted softly. He was huge. The only way you could think to give him any kind of pleasure would be either to ride him and grind yourself along his length as best you could, or to loop your legs around it and let him fuck the space between them, and honestly, both had their appeal.

A huge drop of pre-come slid from the tip and landed on the pebbles below as his cock twitched again. He was breathing hard now, nostrils flared, and he stared openly as you stepped out of the last of your clothes, moving towards him while he stayed perfectly still. It was as if he thought you’d evaporate if he shifted so much as a muscle.

He whispered your name and you placed your finger on his lips in passing as you stalked along the length of his body. With the slightest pressure of your hands you asked him to tip over onto his side again, and he did without question.

The huge dragon folded his wings carefully behind him and then rolled onto his back as you directed him with little more than a quick touch here or there. His cock began to slide fully free of the slick sheath, and you jutted your chin upwards at his belly. He understood your request and brought his hand to the ground, palm up, for you to step into, and he raised you up onto his stomach. His hand fell back immediately to the beach beneath, limp and weak. You straddled his cock and he gave a huge, low frequency groan that made the water ripple and dance. His tail lashed violently, sending a spray of pebbles up into the air and splashing down into the water.

Slowly, teasingly, you rocked your hips over the tip of his cock and watched him leaking beneath you and all over his stomach. The claws of his hands scrabbled in the stones beneath him and his wings, stretched out on either side like a butterfly on display, flexed to their widest span. His head jerked backwards and he opened his maw wide.

“You like that?” you asked and he nodded, mute with pleasure as you picked up a steady rhythm.

“Oh gods that’s so good,” he grunted after a while, voice sounding wrecked. He bucked his hips upwards and nearly dislodged you, but you grabbed the scales of his belly and ground down harder against him, gripping with your thighs. “I’m not going… to last long,” he panted. “I’m… oh gods… oh…” and he chanted your name over and over as you worked him harder and harder.

You managed to catch a ridge of his cock against your clit and ground yourself into it before bringing your finger carefully there to help you along. When he realised what you were doing, he took one look at you pleasuring yourself and using his cock to help, gave a short whimper, before his whole body tensed up.

He came all over himself, ropes of hot release searing against your clit in a rush as his body clenched and convulsed, mouth open in a silent scream of pleasure, and you found yourself coming a heartbeat later. Your fingers gripped his cock, prolonging and intensifying his orgasm as you came in waves atop his cock.

Eventually he slumped back, head knocking against the pebbles behind him, and he lay there, twitching and spent, apparently dazed and reeling from the force of his orgasm. Your legs were slick and shaky too, but as you moved off him, he managed to raise his hand to help you down.

“I’m going to have to bathe in the lake to clean off,” you grunted, looking down at yourself. “Look at me.”

“I am,” he said. “You’re beautiful.”

Feeling a little unsteady still, you turned away from him and said, “Come and join me when you’ve recovered a bit…”

“Mmm,” he said, making no move at all as you strode into the lake. He was clearly enjoying the view, and it was a long time before he rolled himself over and heaved his body up to join you. When he did, he nuzzled you and let you lounge on his foreleg, half in and out of the water. He brought his tongue to your thighs and carefully laved it up and over your body, honing in on your clit which was still aching and sensitive.

Your legs parted instinctively for him and as he raked his teeth appreciatively over your stomach, bringing you up to his maw so that he could taste you better, you let yourself fall limp in his hands. It wasn’t long before he had you shuddering and moaning against his tongue, gasping his name.

He made you come twice more after that, the last time on the grassy bank above the lake shore, and as he curled around you protectively to let you recover, you rested your head against his side and sighed. “I don’t ever want to leave here,” you murmured. “Can it always be like this?”

“I’ll try,” he smiled, laying his head down beside you. “I’ll try.”

—

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#exophilia #ice dragon #dragon x reader #male dragon x female reader #male monster #female reader

[slugtranslation-hypmic]

I am sorry if someone already ask. Oh maybe I didn’t look hard enough, but do you have any ships or favorite bromance? I really like jakuramu, samaichi, samajyu, hifudo, and kuko/jyushi. And my favorite bromance is the Fling Posse and a Buster Bros.

Good choices! I’m not sure what you mean by a bromance, so I’ll go with close friendships for that. Because some people don’t like seeing certain ships and I don’t want to clog up ship tags with non-content, I put it under a cut. Open at your discretion.

Ships I like:

Ramuda / Jakurai is my OTP for Hypmic. I love the potential in their character dynamics for interesting interpretations and what they bring out in one another.

Hifumi / Doppo can bring warm, fuzzy feelings. There’s a lot of sweet fanart and fanfiction about this.

Gentarou / Dice doesn’t necessarily bring me joy, but it exists in the “yeah, that’s canon if canon had shipping involved” category for me like Hifumi / Doppo.

Sasara / Roshou is in that category too. It’s pretty cute.

Samatoki / Juuto doesn’t bring me joy either, but my dear friend and typesetter Cosmo ships it, so I look out for it. It’s a ship-in-law.

Ichirou / Kuukou is really cute.

Ichirou / Nemu is also cute.

Samatoki / Sasara amuses me. I like their interactions.

Otome / Ichijiku is, I think, one sided from Ichijiku’s end.

Ramuda / Dice has a lot of very nice fanart. A friend (the incredibly talented and sweet Nana) once brought up a concept for Ramuda / Dice which is unfortunately lost to the world in our Twitter DMs that revolutionized the way I approach this ship, hahaha.

To be honest, I’m fine with almost any ship. Outside of Ramuda / Jakurai, I don’t have particularly strong feelings about ships. I’ll go, “haha, that’s gay” when working on the manga because I have the maturity of a ten year old, but I don’t really think about them that much unless I see fan interactions. Fan art or fanfics are wonderful because you can see the individual’s love and attention for whatever it is they’re working on. That’s what I enjoy more than any ship - watching other people be happy and have a good time thinking about something they care for.

Friendships I especially like:

Anything in the above list but multiplied times ten. I tend to like platonic interactions more than romantic interactions.

ESPECIALLY Hifumi and Doppo. These two dudes have had each other’s backs for what, twenty-two years now? They’re best friends who live together and shape each other’s lives in mostly positive ways. This is the relationship IDEAL. Love this for them. Fuck yes!

I know I never write it because I am a sell-out used to writing romance, but purely platonic Ramuda and Jakurai is so fucking satisfying. Going on adventures together! Broadening each other’s horizons! Being comfortable enough with their bodies to do whatever the hell Ramuda is doing in every TDD panel Yes! Fuck yes!

destroying everything out of happiness Riou and Dice are such FUCKING GOOD BOYS with a super chill, no strings attached friendship that is nothing but supportive on both sides. YES!!

The Fling Posse friendship is IT. Constantly roasting one another, hanging out together and enjoying each other’s company, being the most ride or die bitches you’ll ever see, growing together - FUCK YES!

The entire Mad Comic Dialogue friend group is phenomenal. I love their banter and their willingness to mess around. This is the SHIT.

The Dirty Dawg’s friendship interactions are amazing too. On one end, you have the babysitters (Ichirou and Jakurai) who are bonding over coffee while on the other end, you have Ramuda taking immense delight in fucking with Samatoki at any given opportunity. We have a chapter about this to drop very soon, and I love it. It was a much-needed fleshing out of them. Delicious. Delightful. Thank you, Karasuduki-sensei.

Whatever the fuck Bad Ass Temple has going on is beyond incredible. Maybe it’s only because Kuukou is there (I really like Kuukou), but the dorkiness in Hitoya’s treatment of the two kids, Juushi opening up to them both, and Kuukou’s loudmouth attitude makes this good. So good.

Oh yeah, I think Nemu and Jirou could be really good friends. They had a cool interaction in the TDD manga. I’d be so down to see Nemu hanging out with the younger part of the cast and causing havoc.

#not a translation #asks #personal asks

[aenngelic]

I will protect her at all costs (chapter 2)

Disclaimer: please don’t hate me for it, if you don’t ship them please just don’t read it ok 🥲

contains: slow burn, Sniper falling in love with Kuon, Snipers view/thoughts, sexual fantasies, nudity, lemon stuff overall

It is a very long chapter I’m sorry

Note: please feel free to message me if you have certain romantic moments to include in the story! (Already running out of ideas oops)

It did not take long for us to find a bag of supplies. It was on a coffee table in some sort of lobby area. It seemed as if this building probably was meant to represent some kind of hotel, which I thought was a good thing, because that meant that there would be beds and showers to be found here as well. To our surprise, the bag contained mostly candy, which I wouldn't interpret as a balanced meal. However, the girl seemed to like this finding. It was only a matter of minutes before the chocolate residue stained the corners of my companion's mouth in a brown color. However, I preferred to smoke a cigarette at first and watch the girl devour her own body weight in the form of chocolate.

" This is fantastic! It feels like forever since I last ate chocolate! I faintly remember dieting before I entered this world too, so this must have been probably weeks since I held chocolate in my hand." Kuon said with delight. It was amusing to watch her enjoy sweets. Kuon's carelessness may be a burden at times, but her innocent character makes up for it.

" you partly remember your life prior to this, don't you?"

" Yes, not much to be honest. I'm sorry you can't," Kuon replied in a concerned voice.

"Tell me about it."

She gave me a visibly puzzled look before straightening her back so that she was sitting as straight as a candle on the sofa across from me, staring at her hands somewhat lost in thought. She seemed uncomfortable that I had now brought up this topic. Unfortunately, I could not take back my question. "Well," she began, "to be honest,the life I remember has not been the greatest, I guess." Kuon abruptly shook her head. " That's not true either. I was born into a rich family and had many privileges. My father owned a large company and had very high expectations of me from the very beginning. One day I was supposed to take it over. I was probably pretty lucky compared to other people. I was probably a big disappointment for him. My character was just not strong enough in his eyes. I also remember not really having any friends either, because I was privately educated. And anyway..." I could literally hear the lump in Kuon's throat as a tear began to stream down the girl's cheek.

" i'm sorry. You know, I didn't really mean to end up crying."

I felt my heart break once again, watching the girl grieve. I was surprised now, though, to find out that this yet seemingly uncomplicated high school student was actually carrying a lot of emotional baggage. I did not hesitate as I jumped up from my seat to calm the blue-haired girl. I really hated it like the plague when she cried. Trying to preserve my Coolness, however, I grumbled, "oh girl. What's wrong?"

I placed myself to her left, and pressed her against my shoulder while running my hand over her hair a few times. There was no way I could bring myself to face her, though. It would be too embarrassing and, after all, I was far from being the Prince Charming who would dry her tears with a silken tissue. Besides, I could not withstand the sight of her teary eyes. So there I sat, a weeping teenage girl wetting my blazer with salty drops of grief on my right, awkwardly staring off into the distance.

"It's, it's..." she stammered, not being able to form a word. "You're the first person I've been able to trust, and because of that, I'm kind of..."

She took a deep breath, "It makes me so unbelievably happy."

Almost for the second time that day, a cigarette nearly got stuck in my throat, but this time I was able to suppress my urge to cough. The girl seemed to really like me. But did I like her too? I would be lying if I said I did not care about her. And if she got killed, I could never forgive myself. It was astonishing how one could form such a strong bond with another person in such a short period of time. However, pouring out my entire feelings in front of her would not come close to the cool lifestyle I was pursuing.

" i'm also happy to have met you, Kuon.", i finally decided to answer after a moment of figuring out how to respond.

Kuon's face, which was still streaked with tears, started to smile again, which made me feel much relieved. However, it took her a while to completely stop her wailing . We remained in this position for a while, until at some point I realized that the girl had fallen asleep. Her head had lowered in the meantime even further toward the ground, so that after some time she was no longer leaning against my shoulder but much rather against my belly. When I noticed this after some time and looked down to the girl, a cute sight presented itself to me. Admittedly, on the one hand it felt nice to act as this girl's pillow. On the other hand, it triggered an immeasurable amount of embarrassment in me. But cool guys do like to take care of girls' comfort, don't they?

Therefore, I decided I'd rather not wake her up and hardly moved at all. I looked out the window to my right, watching the sunset and reflected on certain issues. I was thinking about Rika as well as the two girls we were trying to find and, of course, about Kuon and so many other things until my eyes started to close.

When I regained consciousness, the night must have settled in. Before I could even perceive my surroundings properly, I swiveled my head once to the left and once to the right and let my gaze wander through the room. Because the moon was particularly bright this night, everything around me had taken on a deep blue tone. It was so quiet around me that I could have heard a pin drop. In the next second I realized that I should not have fallen asleep in the first place. Somebody would have had to keep watch, after all! Crap! If an enemy would have come along the way, it certainly would not have been good for me and Kuon. I looked down to my thigh where the blue-haired girl was supposed to lie. I felt her place her head on my thigh at some point during the night, but when I looked down at my thigh, I could not find any girl. Where the hell was Kuon? A rational thinking person, as I was one, could of course assume that my companion did not necessarily have to be in danger, but could also have simply visited the toilet, for example. Nonetheless, my alarm bells started ringing immediately. Kuon was, after all, a young girl who, apart from the "rail gun", did not posses many possibilities for self-defense. So of course I was worried.

Without thinking much, I hopped up from the sofa, on which I had been napping a few moments before. In quick stride I wandered through the poorly lit hallway without really having a clue where I was heading. My head was foggy from the idea that the girl might be in serious danger. A few days ago, I probably would have accepted the fact that she was suddenly nowhere to be found and continued my journey. And now my stomach was already twisting at the thought of her getting in trouble.

Nevertheless, a short moment later, my heart pounding madly from the ever-repeating scenario in my head, I heard a noise at the end of the corridor. A soft, high-pitched humming was heard, drowned out by the pattering of many drops. Light emerged from the crack of a door on the left. Was she taking a shower? The feeling of relief spread through my chest, followed by some degree of annoyance. Why did the girl not wake me up? I took a few steps towards the door, but before I was about to reach for the door handle, I remembered that I should not do so. A gentleman never violates a lady's privacy. So I decided to wait.

I leaned against the local wall, one leg bent. Then I let my thoughts wander, while the pattering of the raindrops in the bathroom right next to me showed no indication of stopping anytime soon. A lady of high society must spend quite a bit of her life showering, I thought to myself. And before I knew it, the image of Kuon suddenly popped up in my head. In my imagination I pictured her body, wondering what it looked like completely naked. A bar of soap running over her plump breasts, leaving traces of foam on her soft, wet skin. A body swinging under the hot rainfall like a leaf in the wind, presenting its vivid buttocks. I wonder if she was shaved? Hardly had I been able to finish this dirty thought of mine and get mad at my filthy thinking when my ears picked up the sound of footsteps in the distance. And they were coming ominously closer.

Damn, I thought to myself and was about to reach for my rifle, only to realize that I forgot it next to the sofa where I had been sleeping. I had been so upset about her disappearance that I could seriously forget the most crucial item for our survival.What was I going to do? For a brief moment I was at a loss. Escape proved almost impossible at this point, since I was at a dead end and I could not force the approaching enemy down with any surrounding objects. Besides, if I escaped, it would only be a matter of time before the enemy would track down my helpless companion. In the next moment, almost instinctively, I reached for the door handle that led to the bathroom that Kuon had still claimed. Perhaps there were objects in the room that were suitable for fighting, or perhaps we could be lucky and not be found, I speculated in the heat of the moment. So I tore open the door and rushed into the bathroom, greeted by a hot haze that took over the entire area.

"Kuon!" I called out in a hushed tone.

Without hesitation, I pushed my way through the door that separated the shower from the rest of the bathroom as if I was walking through nothing. Until that moment, I had hardly given a thought to the circumstances of this situation. But at the latest, when finally the naked body of a schoolgirl jumped into my field of vision, I quickly realized this again. I was just about to violate Kuon's privacy. An obviously shocked girl looked towards me, that from 1 second to the other tried to cover herself desperately.

"Mr.Ma-", she was about to say, but I interrupted her raised voice by pressing my hand to her lips as quickly as possible.

While I was still in the act of stepping into the shower, I flicked the light switch in the same movement so that no sign of our presence could escape from the room. Maybe they would not find us here, I hoped at this point.

"There's someone out there," I whispered to the naked girl in front of me.

" if we are quiet, maybe we won't be found. If we are, then..."

Kuon replied to me with an unintelligible "Mmm" , which resembled the sound of a frightened gasp. My body had pressed so close to hers by now that I could feel the wetness of her skin soaking through my shirt. I had directed my face facing away from her so that I could sharpen my hearing for the footsteps I could hear. Furthermore , I did not want to add unnecessary tension to the whole situation. It was uncool enough to interfere with a naked girl taking a shower even if it was an emergency. My hand was still resting on her lips and even though I was wearing gloves and looking away, I could clearly feel the warmth building up in Kuon's cheeks. She was obviously blushing in this moment. But having her pressed against the bathroom wall while forcing my hand tightly onto her lips and not even keeping a distance of not 2 inches, I could not blame her.

For quite a while, we did not move at all. We listened closely to the footsteps, which came a little closer and finally slowly moved away from us again. Temporarily it was even so quiet in this bathroom that we could hear each other breathing. Kuon's breathing was fast and almost verged on hyperventilation in this situation. Because there was hardly any distance between our bodies, I could literally feel her chest rising and falling in short intervals. With each rise, her breasts brushed my upper body a slight bit. I tried, as always, to keep my composure and block out the fact that Kuon was completely naked. Only when several minutes had passed did my posture loosen and I breathed a sigh of relief.

"Okay, we should be safe for now," I stated and let go of the girl.

I flipped the light switch and had to swallow.

Kuon had been naked before too, but it was only now that the danger was gone that I could really comprehend this fact. She had tried to cover her breasts with her hands and had simultaneously crossed her legs, looking down with a shameful expression on her face. However, the concealment attempt seemed to be unsuccessful for her. Although I only caught a glimpse of her appearance before I turned away from her as quickly as possible, I saw her entire beauty for a moment.Her breasts were in relation to her otherwise so petite body, large and plump. She had a narrow waist and perfectly shaped legs, in combination with her smooth, fair skin. And so she shaved, I could still tell. What remained most imprinted on my mind, however, was the look on her face.I of course preferred to see her friendly smile a thousand times more than this face that expressed pure shame. But I could not help but adore the sight of her big sparkling dog eyes looking at the ground helplessly.

My breath stopped for a moment, but then I quickly cleared my throat, my gaze already averted from her, scanning the room for a towel. I tried to hide the fact that I actually wanted to slap myself for the thoughts I was having. Luckily, my embarrassment was not visible through the mask. I had to change the subject immediately before the situation became even more awkward:

"Sorry, Kuon." , I mumbled. I was surprised myself by my harsh tone. It took me a while to recollect the words.

"You should let me know next time you decide to go somewhere else."

"Oh yeah right. I didn't mean to cause any trouble.", Countered the girl who also seemed to be a bit embarrassed. So it wasn't just me who was feeling uncomfortable about this situation. Without giving my companion another look, I threw a towel right over my head at her. I had a precise aim.

" I'm going to get my rifle. I forgot it in all the hurry near the sofa."

Just as I was about to open the door to step out, the girl interrupted my process by grabbing my arm with unusual intensity.

" can you come back here afterwards? Please?"

"That's what I was planning on doing anyway. I'll be waiting right outside the door," I replied, a bit puzzled by this question.

" but I have -." she interrupted herself, shaking her head slightly before continuing.

Then her facial expression regained its former composure, whereupon she gave me her typical, beaming smile. I could tell, however, that she did not mean it honestly. How I could tell that, I had no idea myself though. But did she want me to stay here with her?

" no you're right. I'll hurry up and be done in a few minutes," she said. While she was talking, she wrapped the towel around her body in a quick movement, fastening it in front with the help of a knot.

I had meanwhile turned my gaze back to her. Although Kuon was now dressed, it was difficult for me not to inspect her from top to bottom. Her entire body was still drenched in a hint of wetness, so that her skin was reflectingthe bright bathroom light. It was also slightly red from the hot shower water. I wondered if the red tint to her cheeks was also caused by that, or if I was responsible for it.I could not help but notice the way the towel just managed to hide all the places it was supposed to cover and yet was far too tight. If she bent over, a special view would present itself to me. Immediately I dashed this disgusting thought from my head. If I continued to reduce myself only to her appearance this could end in negligence on my part and I would not be able to protect her properly.After all, that was the most important thing. I also discarded this thought. Had this strange girl really become so important to me? Nevertheless, there was no place for interpersonal relationships in this world.Before I could get any further into this train of thought, I turned away again and finally walked out of the room. I was in need of a cigarette.

#kuniper #kuon shinzaki #sniper mask #yuka makoto #high rise invasion #tenkuu shinpan #yuka makoto smut #yu chan #rika honjo #yuri honjo #sky high survival #sky violation #shinzaki kuon #fanfic

[baepsaesbae]

Pag Lubog Ng Araw || When the Sun Goes Down

Pairing— Jeon Jungkook x reader

Genre— SMUT, Angst, Enemies to Lovers au, Delinquent gang au

Warnings— Oral (f receiving), face riding, explicit unprotected sex, somewhat rough sex, fighting (they engage in fisticuffs quite a bit), swearing

Word Count— 2.4k

Summary— The gang leader of an enemy group has been getting on your nerves. This town ain’t big enough for the both of you. 

A/N— Thank you @dollwithluv for requesting! I hope you like it! I got kinda carried away with this one oops. You can still request drabbles up until the end of the August with this post

“Is that all you got, Jeon?” you spat in his face after blocking a powerful kick.

“I’m going easy on you. Just testing out the waters,” Jungkook smirked before landing another blow, knocking you aside.

Now it’s your turn to show off. With your balance regained, you launched forward to unleash a flurry of fast punches and jabs on Jungkook’s torso. That made Jungkook stagger backwards, but it wasn’t nearly close enough to knock him down. And so the scuffle continued. 

You and your gang of girls ruled this town, striking fear into any man who dared looked your way. Or so you thought. Recently, a rowdy group of boys were looking to expand their territory--directly into yours. Of course, you weren’t going down without a fight. Literally.

“You idiots get lost! We’ve been here for ages,” one of your posse members yelled over your skirmish. 

“Why don’t you ladies just move aside? You’ll be under our protection once we take over. You guys can even continue patrolling like you normally would. The only difference is that you’d be flying under our banner, so to speak. That ain’t too bad, right?” one of the boys from Jungkook’s band of delinquents (you believe his name was Seokjin) tried to reason. 

“Over my dead body!” you screamed as you exchanged blows with Jungkook.

“That can be arranged,” Jungkook gritted his teeth. 

“Get em boss!” underlings from both sides cheered. 

10 minutes later, both you and Jungkook were battered and bruised. Jungkook’s lip was busted and your nose was bleeding. Both sides concluded that the match was a draw.

“You’re tougher than I thought,” Jungkook acknowledged.

“I’ll knock your ass to the ground and beat you to a pulp next time,” you threatened with a menacing glare.

“So feisty,” Jungkook chuckled as he spat out blood.

Back at your gang’s headquarters (an abandoned shack that you refurbished), your friends tended to your wounds. 

“You have no idea how badly I wanted to jump in and smash his skull in,” Nayeon tsked as she bandaged your hands, “But I know you would’ve hung my booty above your fireplace if I meddled.”

“I appreciate the concern. He roughed me up pretty good, but I’m sure he’s licking his wounds right now too. Plus this is a leader to leader thing. You are my girls, and I’m gonna fight for you till the very end,” you gave them a thumbs up with a smug smile.

The girls cheered and applauded for their fearless leader. They know that past your tough exterior, you’re a fiercely loyal kind hearted person. Most of the gals joined your group after you saved them from being harassed or abused by various men. If there’s one thing you hate, it’s misogynists. Or maybe just men in general. 

Both gangs practically tiptoed around each other for the following weeks while their leaders were still recovering. You tried devising plans to run them out of town. Your gang was bigger, so you’d definitely win in an all out war against seven guys. But you quickly brushed that idea aside, not wanting to endanger your crew. 

“We gotta have another showdown,” you concluded during a gang meeting. 

“What?! You got so hurt last time. There’s no way we could let you--”

“Shut up! What ___ says goes. You know that,” Nayeon silenced the complaint. 

“Sunmi, bring this letter to the Bulletproof Boy Scouts. I still can’t believe they named themselves that,” you snickered as you handed her a paper with a formal challenge scribbled on it. 

“Uh, boss, I don’t think we’ll need to send that letter,” someone called out from the back after there was a pounding on the door. 

“Open it,” you commanded.

Standing on the other side of the door was a pretty boy whose smile lit up the room. No one would believe that he’s in a delinquent gang, you barely could. But then again, it seemed like that gang only recruited models with a penchant for violence and mischief. 

“Hey pretty ladies! I’m Jimin. I come on behalf of the leader of the Bangtan Boys. He wants a final showdown. Only him and ___ are allowed in the specified location while they fight. He said the rest of us can brawl outside if we felt like it, but I’ll leave that decision up to the audience. Here’s our official note of challenge,” Jimin handed a crumpled receipt to the nearest girl, “Sorry, that was the only paper we had on hand,” he apologized sheepishly. 

“Sundown two days from now at the vacant warehouse huh? Sounds fine to me. Any rules?” you raised a brow at Jimin after reading the challenge aloud. 

“I dunno. That’s all the boss discussed with us. Figured you two would make it up as you go. In terms of weapons, Jungkook prefers to use his hands,” Jimin answered.

“So practically no rules. I can roll with that. See you boys in two days,” you shooed the messenger away. 

“Are you sure about this? You’re finally starting to recover--”

“Gear up. You’re gonna help me spar,” you interrupted Nayeon. You didn’t have any time to waste before the rematch. 

~The Day of Reckoning~

Your girl gang surrounded the warehouse. They weren’t happy about leaving you alone, but they were ready to keep anyone else from interfering. You tapped your foot impatiently as you waited at the front. 

“Is this heaven? There are angels as far as the eye can see!” one of the boys whistled as soon as they pulled up. 

“I wouldn’t count on that, Tae. These gals would probably stab you in your sleep and steal your wallet or something. Not like you have any money in there anyway,�� Jungkook teased.

The group of boys sauntered through the crowd of sneering women until Jungkook stood directly in front of you. 

“Let’s settle this once and for all, you piece of shit. Loser skips town,” you asserted.

“Works for me. I’ll hate to see you go,” Jungkook’s tongue quickly darted to lick the corner of his mouth. The action was meant to be intimidating, but it stirred something inside of you. You tossed the feeling aside; he was the enemy. And you’re about to kick his ass.

The warehouse smelled like mold mixed with wet dogs. It was dark. The only light source was the sun’s rays that shone through cracks and holes in the walls or from the partly torn off ceiling. It was already dwindling. Jungkook loudly slammed the door behind him. You led him to the middle of the building, turning to face him before the fight could start. 

“Hope you enjoyed your time here,” you taunted.

“We did. We like it here better than our own hometown. You sure you don’t wanna just let us take over? I won’t have to ruin that pretty face of yours,” Jungkook offered again. 

“Fuck off Jeon,” you scoffed before throwing the first punch. 

You found yourself locked in a repetitive pattern of offensive and defensive moves. Jungkook’s attacks felt heavier, but you moved even faster. It seemed like both of you had reserved your full strength last time. 

Jungkook’s last punch knocked you off balance. He took the opportunity to knock you to the ground, effectively pinning you under him. He leaned close to your face and smiled maliciously down at you as he assumed that his victory was assured. He was wrong.

You banged your head against his with as much force as you could muster. In a flash, your positions had been switched. Jungkook groaned in agony under you as you tightened your hold on him. 

“Surrender, or I’ll pulverize you,” you threatened.

“Let me tell you something first,” he wheezed.

You reluctantly moved closer to him, but were on guard just in case he tried to headbutt you. 

“Closer,” he demanded.

“No fuck you--”

Jungkook used the last of his strength to repel his upper body towards you to plant a rough kiss on your lips. You looked at him in shock, releasing your grip. Jungkook placed his hand on the back of your neck and pulled you towards him, stopping you just centimeters in front of his lips. 

“Sorry, I couldn’t help myself. I have a thing for strong women,” he whispered. 

You lunged forward and knocked Jungkook flat on his back as you kissed him ferociously. The taste of blood was tinged with desire as the kiss deepened. No one could deny that Jungkook is a handsome boy. Seeing him all beaten up made him even more attractive to you, especially knowing that he’s tough enough to compete with you. 

“You know, I thought you looked cute with a busted lip,” you said when you broke the kiss.

“I’d look even cuter if you busted on my lip,” he winked, “Ride my face, ___. Please,” he added. 

“What? Right now? I’m all sweaty because we’ve been fighting and--”

“I don’t give a shit. Let me taste you. Unless you’re uncomfortable, of course,” Jungkook showed his decent side. 

“In that case,” you say as you slide off your pants.

You kneel above Jungkook’s face, your clothed cunt hovering inches away from his open mouth. 

“Come. Here,” Jungkook roughly pulled you down onto his mouth. 

He licked wide stripes along your panties, soaking them with both his saliva and your arousal. Ripping the measly piece of material off, he dove nose first into your pussy. His tongue explored your folds, making you squirm. He placed a strong grip on your hips to hold you firmly in place. He moved his arm to let his hand rest right above your pussy. 

Without warning, his thumb began to circle your swollen clit. You whimpered at his touch. The pace of his thumb synced up with his tongue as he shallowly dipped it into you. You could feel something ball up within you. No doubt your climax was on a one way express train pummeling towards its final stop. Destination: All over Jungkook’s face. 

“Jeon I--I’m gonna” you shuddered.

“Lay it on me baby,” he said, muffled by your pussy.

A euphoric high took over your body a couple of intense seconds later. You were tingling from your nose down to your toes as you weakly dismounted Jungkook. He licked around his mouth, savoring your cum.

“I guess you’re right, you do look better after I busted all over your lips. And face. Sorry bout the mess,” you laughed. 

“You could let me fuck you if you really wanna make it up to me,” Jungkook suggested as he palmed his groin. 

“Do you fuck as well as you eat pussy?” you inquired as you sat beside him. 

“Only one way to find out. You down?” he propped himself up by his elbows.

“Fuck me senseless, pretty boy,” you requested. 

“Sure thing, except,” Jungkook pushed you onto your back, “I’m on top this time.” 

Jungkook shimmied out of his pants, revealing his already hard dick. It wasn’t too girthy, but it was long. You had a feeling he’d hit all the right places with ease. You were still sopping wet, so Jungkook slid in without a problem. He took his time feeling every inch of you before finally bottoming out. 

Jungkook began to fuck you harder, making your entire body shake with each impact. Your wanton moans mixed with his grunts as he snapped his hips faster. His hand snaked its way from your chest up to your neck. He placed a harsh grip on the sides and smiled down at you with satisfaction. Normally you’d enjoy this, but not today. Not with Jungkook.

A quick jab at his side prompted him to release you and nearly double over. Before he had the chance to cuss you out, you flipped him over, reclaiming your rightful place. You ease yourself back onto his cock, bringing him back to a blissful state. 

You rode him like your life depended on it. Your hips had a mind of their own as they rocked back and forth. Jungkook groaned with pleasure as he rested his hands on your hips. You began to fuck him with a purpose, changing your pace.

“Whatcha doin?” he moaned.

“Spelling my name on your dick. Now it belongs to me,” you answered proudly. 

“Oh fuck, is that so? Are we dating or some shit?”

“Shut up and we’ll figure it out post nut,” you hushed him.

You brought up your knees and squatted over him with your feet on the ground. You bounced up and down and let yourself get lost in the moment. Your carnal voices harmonized and echoed throughout the abandoned warehouse. The sun had finally set, now replaced by the pale moonlight. 

“Baby keep going, just like that. I’m gonna cum. Wait fuck should we be using a con--uuuggghhhh,” Jungkook didn’t get to finish that sentence.

He exploded into you, his warm seed shooting up into you. You bent over to kiss him once more. What was meant to be a quick peck turned into a heated makeout session. 

“Give me a little bit before I can fuck you again,” Jungkook said once the kiss broke. 

“We have more pressing matters to address. Uh, what exactly should we do now? I don’t know if we can really declare a winner or a loser,” you pointed out. 

“I’d say we were both winners today,” Jungkook nodded.

“Interesting…” you thought out loud.

“What?”

“Are you still open to combining forces? Only this time, we’d be on equal footing. We can make a stronger gang together,” you suggested. 

“I don’t see why not. Everyone is outside anyway right? Let’s go break the news,” Jungkook agreed. 

“We both look like shit. And we smell awful,” you observed.

“Eh, it happens. They gotta respect their leaders no matter what, right?” Jungkook shrugged. 

Both Nayeon and Jimin fell into the warehouse as soon as you opened the door. 

“We weren’t doing anything!” Nayeon said quickly.

“We were just wondering if one or both of you were dead, so we tried to see if we could hear you guys and…” Jimin couldn’t maintain eye contact with either of you.

You pushed them aside and walked out to face the delinquents that were eagerly awaiting the official verdict.  

“Listen up dirtbags! Starting today, we will be combining forces. We are now one gang, and we’re gonna be the strongest gang this country has ever seen!” you announced.

“You hear that boys? We’ll be seeing these angels on the regular!” Jungkook chimed in. 

“What the hell?!” was the resounding response as Jungkook grabbed you by the waist and locked his lips with yours.

Published August 11th, 2020. No editing, copying, translating, or reposting allowed. All Rights Reserved © 2020 Baepsaesbae.

#bts smut #jungkook smut #bangtanarmynet #btswritingcafe #jungkook angst #bts angst #bts fanfic #kpop fanfic #kpop angst #paralumanplaylist #jungkook x reader #bts x reader #ksmutclub

[misshuney]

Why Supernatural Shouldve Ended After Season 11

I just watched the rest of supernatural and just really need to vent. these are all just my opinions and analyzations and yours may differ!

I've been putting off watching supernatural for a while now because deep down I knew the current writers would not do the last seasons justice, and boy was I right.

Mind you, I'm not one of those fans with the "spn should've ended with season 5, every season after that is trash" mentality. I actually really loved seasons 6-11.

even watching season 11 I couldn't help but wonder...where are they going to go after this? they've stopped the apocalypse, defeated the leviathans, and patched up gods relationship with his sister.

the writers:oh I know! let's bring back Mary! (just to kill her off again later on) and introduce the positively boring British men of letters.  I stopped watching that year because that season was just so boring with so many pointless subplots that i didn't start watching again till this year.

the writing really went downhill that year. I'm out of the loop with alot of the behind the scenes stuff since I don't live and breath spn, but did they change writers?

■■Bad writing

season twelve was where alot of the fun and comedic elements of the show were wiped clean, which just left a whole lot of angst, drama, and action. but it just get so...dull without the lightheartedness that the show used to posses. dont get me wrong I love the drama and the angst,but when it's just moments after moments and full episodes of that, with no breaks in between, or hopeful moments, it gets damn boring. (especially when we've seen the formula so many times before. big bad, Sam, Dean and Cass making stupid impulsive decisions) but without the lighthearted and sweet moments thrown into the mix, it really is just depressing.

but where I REALLY have a bone to pick with writers, is how they ruined our favorite ■■characters development.

☆Crowley King of Hell

do not even get me started on how they killed off crowley! mark was wronged and I'm glad he made it known publicly!

I hate the "crowley was around for too long" excuse.

you wanna know who really overstayed his welcome? lucifer. as much as I love his character , he used to be this scary powerful angel, who turned into a joke the more they brought him back. Amara should've killed him off after casifer happened. I'm not even gonna go further on that because I could go on and on.

why is it that the winchesters grow to trust and like Rowena but the writers never allow them to truly grow their relationship with crowley?

crowley was not just some villain, he and the winchesters had a complicated relationship, but he should've atleast gotten a better send off.

Excuses■■

first off, I don't want to hear, the characters evolved they couldn't stay the same. that's true, they've all grown throughout the season, but why the drastic changes that happened in the last 3 seasons? they really were stripped of their core personalities and left with some 2 dimensional characters at the end, they were no longer complex.

(CASTIEL)

-oh castiel..my sweet angel baby, what is you doing is all I could think. Cas has had many arks, throughout the series. his character is always evolving for  better or worse. but you always got the sense that he is trying, and he'll always put up a fight to do whatever he thinks is right. untill season 12 and on. Cas went from this strong,awkward yet charming character.. to a boring weakling, there I said it. I don't know if Misha checked out the last few seasons or if he was just doing his best with what he was given..but castiel just comes off as so far removed and every action he takes feels so tedious. they zapped completely his dry sense of humor, and replaced it with grunts and constipated looks. I know that the angels have there wings clipped, but God, castiel can't even take on ur run of the mill monster anymore, when he used to go around smiting demons left and right even when he lost his memory. there's not even chemistry between him and Dean anymore.

- Sam was more or less the same, just twitchier, no comment on him. just less fire in him and far less complex then he used to be as a  character who always internally struggling to weight right from wrong, selfishness and sacrifice etc. he's just there.

-i could take or leave jack. didn't hate him, didn't love him.

(DEAN) The thing that pissed me off the most is how dirty they did dean. his whole thing was always being lead by his heart and fighting tooth and nail to save those who needed saving, because he couldn't not care. also, I do believe the reason that dean never went crazy after all those years of trauma and violence, was his sense of humor. he could always find a light hearted moment or a joke within all the chaos that surrounded his life. they just decided to remove all that and we were left with a cold, and angry man that gives you the sense that he's doing all this because he's supposed to, not because he really cares or loves anymore. the way they wrote him, it really did seem like Sam, Cas and Jack were just a burden to him. they weren't even in the dream world where Michael locked dean away when he possesed him. There never seemed to be a true connection between him and Jack either, he didn't seem to care whether he died or if he had to kill him himself. You get the sense that he spared Jack's life because he knew it wasn't the right thing to do, not because he loved him. If Dean doesn't act out on love anymore, then what the hell is he doing?

why was the complexity of these characters erased?

final opinions/questions**

there was not enough character development in making chuck go from this benevolent being into a malevolent one. it was just the "logical" thing to do since the guys have fought every single thing in existence already, that they take on the last big powerful character. everything known about him in the past was also discarded. they made him so petty and annoying, I'm sure Chuck was upset that things weren't going the way he wanted, but I know he saw Sam and Dean's side of it as well, (like in the season 5 finale monologue) and they could've shown us that! but they just thew away every other ones of his traits away.

also, why did the writers love screwing with Kevin Tran so much??? he truly got the end of the stick and didn't deserve it.

in the end, our heroes really went out sad and didn't get what they deserved. not even going to comment on the ending.

the way I see it, there were two good endings that were thrown away. The best ending would've been Season 5 finale and a good ending could've been the Season 11 finale. anything else was undeserved.

#supernatural #dean winchester #sam winchester #castiel #destiel #misha collins #jensen ackles #jared paladecki #mark sheppard #mark pellegrino #spn #spnwatch #spnfandom #spnfamily

[ilovefandoms102]

Enough is Enough

Pairing: JJ x Plus Size Reader

Summary: You and JJ are starting to constantly be harassed by the Kooks about your relationship. What happens when it becomes too much for you to handle?

Taglist:

@drewswannabegirl @velyssaraptor @kaitieskidmore1 @jiaraendgame @teamnick @jeyramarie @they-write-once-in-a-blue-moon​ @baby-pogue​ @ma10427​ @judayyyw​ @must-be-a-weasley-92​ @iamaunicorn4704​ @agirlwholovescoffee​ @justcallmesams​ @lasnaro​ @lonely-kermit​ @jellyfishbeansontoast​ @ifilwtmfc​ @gviosca​ @fernweh-fangirl​ @runway-to-my-aid​ @eb15​ @tangledinsparkles​ @hurricane-abigail​ @outerbongs​ @jaxandcomet​ 

Note: This is for the anon that requested this summary, I tried to combine the ending so I hope that’s ok! I hope I made you proud! And as always I hope you guys enjoy and let me know what you think!

=======================

JJ and I have been best friends since we were in diapers. Our parents big on the drug market in The Cut. We had similar home lives in that as well, except my parents just mentally abuse me. I had always been ‘bigger’ than everyone else we grew up with. JJ and the others accepting and never having a problem with my size, but my parents were never ending on how I needed to change. There was nothing more than I hated then having to go home....

The endless comments about how I’m ‘too fat’, ‘need to go on a diet’, ‘have you tried exercising’, ‘how do you have friends’, ‘you will never be loved because you are fat.......It wasn’t just them I got these kind of comments from however, the Kooks were also ruthless when it came to body shaming....

========================================

I had started developing feelings for JJ about a year ago, he had started sending me mixed signals that just confused me to no end. For example, he would only want to sit beside me anytime we went anywhere, sometimes he would hold my hand, and he had become a lot more touchy. Which I didn’t mind at first, I thought nothing of it. It wasn’t until at a kegger when JJ got piss drunk and I had to take him back to the chateau since I was the only one capable of driving that things had changed between us....

“You know, you’re really pretty.” JJ slurred, his hat tipped way down over his eyes.

“Who, your hat because I’m sure that’s all you can see right now J.” I laughed, tipping it back up for him. 

“No silly, I’m talking about you! I think, I think I might be falling in love with you.” he hiccuped.

“What the fuck JJ?!” I yelled, looking at my very intoxicated friend.

“Well...I am. Fuck, you’re so beautiful, my favorite part of the day is seeing you. Do-do you think you’re falling in love with me too y/n?” he asked, trying to sit up in the car seat.

“I don’t even know how to respond to that JJ.” I groaned, pulling into the chateau.

“Just say yes or no what do you mean?” he slurred, giving me a ‘duh’ look.

I helped him out, he was a lot heavier than he looked. I kind of threw him on the couch because it was enough getting him up the stairs of the porch. He whined when his face hit the cushions, rolling over to face me. He grinned widely, sitting up not so sturdily. 

“Are you going to answer me baby?” he asked, playing with a strand of my hair.

“You’re hammered J, you won’t remember any of this in the morning. Go to sleep.” I mumbled, getting up to take his bed for the night.

“Nooo, come back I need to know! Babyyyyyy.” he whined, seconds later he was snoring.

===================================

 I woke up encased in warmth, I threw my hand out to take the blankets off when I came in to contact with something hard. I turned to see JJ beside me, his strong arms caging me against him. I didn’t even know he had came in here last night....Does he even remember doing it?

“Ow,” JJ groaned.

“JJ, what are you doing in here?” I asked, turning in his hold. 

“Sleeping,” he grumbled, nuzzling his head further into me.

“I’m positive I left you on the couch last night.” I said, brushing some hair out of his eyes.

“I wanted a cuddle buddy,” he pouted, his eyes still closed. 

“Do you remember last night?” I asked hesitantly.

“Bits and pieces, but I do know what I said to you.” he said, cracking his eyes open. My breath hitched in my throat, preparing myself for the worst.

“It’s ok J, we all say things we don’t mean when we’re drunk.” I chuckled, trying to play it off.

“Well I meant what I said, and I know you feel the same way.” he said, blue eyes staring deep into mine.

“Full of yourself much Maybank?” I scoffed, pushing him playfully. 

“I know you like the back of my hand sweetheart, which  I was surprised you never said anything. I think I’ve made it pretty clear that I’m into you.” he said, his eyes searching mine for any tell of what I might be thinking. 

“JJ, look at me....do you know what people would say? I can’t let you go through that.” I whispered, hiding my face in his chest.

“There’s nothing wrong with you. I don’t give a flying fuck what people have to say about us. I-I love you, and I will do whatever I have to. I want to be with you.” he said, pulling my head back to look in my eyes.

“I love you J,” I whispered, tears gathering in my eyes. 

He kissed me hard, our teeth clashing together at the force. All of our pent up emotions and feelings for each other poured out into the kiss. Teeth and tongues moving sloppily, but it was beautiful. Never in a million years did I think JJ would ever feel the way I felt. I never thought any guy would give me the time of day, but all this time.....it was JJ.

====================================

It’s been about 6 months since JJ and I became official....

I was over the moon with him, never have I felt happier then when I was with him.

That was until the Kooks found out..more specifically, Rafe and his posse. It was hard enough with them harassing us because we are Pogues, but now they go out of their way to get at JJ and I. JJ of course flew off the handle anytime they mentioned my name, and I was tired of having to clean him up. I didn’t like seeing the marks on his face...I had seen enough of them come from his dad. I couldn’t help but feel like it was all my fault.... 

What drew the line for me was a day Pope, JJ, and I were making some deliveries to Figure Eight. Of course we were minding our own business when Rafe, Kelce, and Topper spotted us walking by the golf course. 

“Well, well look who we have here Top!” Rafe yelled, all of us freezing in our spot. I did not want to do this today.

“Guys come on, let’s just do these deliveries and go home.” I sighed, trying to pull on JJ’s bicep.

“You might run out of business if you keep having fatty here make runs with you Pope, she probably eats everything before it gets to the door.” Rafe smirked, eyeing JJ. 

“You watch your fucking mouth Rafe,” JJ growled.

“JJ please, they aren’t worth it.” I whispered, tugging on him again. 

“Hush piggy.” Topper said, shoving you to the side. 

No clue where it came from, but I had enough with them bullying us. I swerved my fist back and punched Topper straight in the nose, a sickening crunch sound followed by a shout came from Topper. Everything happened so fast after that... Topper grabbed me, pulling me off to the side. JJ and Pope were busy fighting off Rafe and Kelce.

“You will NEVER be good enough for him to love you y/n. You know that right?” Topper taunted, holding his bloody nose. 

“He does love me Topper!” I shouted, frustrated tears rolling down my face.

“Who could ever love someone like you? Look at you! You’re disgusting, ugly, and fat” he laughed.

“Shut the fuck up Topper!” I screamed.

I heard a scream, my eyes tearing from Topper to see Rafe beating JJ with his golf club. I cried out in horror, going to JJ’s aid. I was held back by Topper, his sinister chuckle sending chills through me. JJ tried to fight back, reaching for the golf club to stop its attack. Blood covered his beautiful face, splattering Rafe’s shirt. Sobs wracked my body, it became harder to breathe every moment I had to endure.

“JJ!” I yelled, tearing myself from Topper’s hold. I ran at Rafe, my only thoughts were keeping JJ and Pope safe.

“No!” Pope yelled as I ran towards Rafe.

I jumped on Rafe’s back, wrapping my legs around him so I could grab the golf club. It provided enough distraction for JJ to jump up, grabbing the golf club from Rafe and tossing it. Topper threw me off of Rafe, my face hitting the gravel below. The Kooks had enough since they ran off from us, leaving all of us beaten and bloody. I looked at JJ who was starting to sway, I got to him just in time before he hit the gound.

“JJ!” I yelled, and he was unresponsive....

==================================

I sat in the ER room with JJ, machines and tubes running every which way. Silent tears still rolled down my face, the reality of everything overwhelming my brain....I couldn’t let JJ keep getting hurt for me. He has enough to deal with at home, I can’t bare bringing him anymore hurt. It was too much, my heart shattered to pieces. I knew I had to end things before they got worse, no one else was getting hurt for me...

==================================

I was huddled up in my room a few days later, not having spoken to JJ, or any of the Pogues. I had hundreds of missed calls, texts, and FaceTime’s. This way, no one could get hurt. This way would be better for them. 

That’s what I kept telling myself at least....

There was a loud banging on my front door, I looked out the window and saw JJ. I froze, his solemn blue eyes made my heart clench. I opened the door slowly, met with my teary eyed boyfriend. His eyes were so red, it looked like he hadn’t slept in weeks. His slight stubble adding to his tired appearance.

“Why the fuck haven’t you been answering your damn phone!” he bellowed, veins popping out of his neck.

“I want to break up.” I blurted. His face dropped, fresh tears coming to his eyes.

“What?” he asked, his voice croaking. 

“I-I don’t want to do this anymore JJ.” I said, trying to sound convincing. 

“What has happened in the past three days that you decided you don’t want to be with me anymore? Do...Do you not love me anymore?” he whispered, the sheer pain in his voice made me want to forget my plan.

“No,” I croaked, trying to keep my tears at bay. I breathed in, clutching tight on the door.

“You’re lying.” he growled, seeing right through me.

“Dammit JJ! I can’t do this! I can’t watch you and the others get hurt for me anymore! Rafe almost fucking killed you because I’m fat!” I screamed.

“Don’t you fucking say that again! You are not fat! You are beautiful just the way you are, who the fuck cares about the Kooks? They harass us anyways, it wouldn’t matter!” he yelled back, tears rolling down both our faces at this point. 

“Either way, this is done JJ. Goodbye.” I said, slamming the door in his face.

“Baby please! Open the door! I love you, please don’t leave me! Y/N!” he cried, fists pounding on the door.

 I could hear his sobs through the wood, my heart breaking as I cried with him...

=======================================

Almost a week had gone by...

I haven’t ate, slept, just stared at my wall and let the tears roll. I felt like shit....literal shit. I hated myself for looking the way I did...not only did it cost my happiness with JJ, but it put the Pogues in danger. I wished more than anything that I could look like Kie, or Sarah. A skinny, beautiful girl. Someone people are excited to see, someone who can wear no makeup and look flawless, someone who didn’t have to try....

“Kie is here piggy,” my mother slurred, stumbling back to the living room.

“Hey” she whispered, taking in my tear soaked features.

“Hi Kie,” I croaked, my bottom lip trembling.

She came to me, sitting beside me as she wrapped her arms around me. I cried in her arms, what I’m sure JJ had done as well.

“I’ve missed you,” she said, brushing my tears away.

“You don’t have to say that because you feel sorry for me Kie.” I chuckled.

“When are you going to understand that we love YOU. You are the glue of our group, you light up everyone’s day. You’re kind, funny, beautiful, and just an all around amazing friend.” she said, holding my hands tightly. 

“Kie...I’m-” I started.

“You are not fat, I don’t want to hear that word out of your mouth. JJ has been a mess this whole week, what is going on?” she asked, so I explained everything to her.

“I can’t let him get hurt for me when he has enough of hurt from his dad Kiara.” I muttered, looking into her brown orbs. 

“You all need each other y/n. You’re each other’s soulmates, I truly believe that. JJ can take care of himself just like the rest of us can. We would do anything for you, you’re our family.” she said, pulling me into a hug.

“I love you all so much Kie, I can’t let them keep hurting you all.” I sobbed.

“You let us deal with that, now, I think you should talk to JJ.” Kie sighed.

“I-...I can’t Kie. There’s no way he’d take me back. He-he doesn’t understand...” I mumbled, picking at my fingers.

“Alright, I’ll talk to him. Then we can go from there yeah?” she asked, raising her brow. I nodded, hugging her again before she took off.

=====================================

It wasn’t even an hour later before knocking at my door was heard again. I looked to see my mom passed out on the couch, a bottle of liquor in her hand. I ran to the door, peaking out to see JJ. He looked just as bad if not worse than me.

“Hi,” he whispered, looking me up and down.

“JJ,” I croaked.

We both collapsed into each other, crying into the other’s shoulder. I clutched onto JJ tight, afraid that if I let go I’d lose him again. We both mumbled apologies to each other. His huge, ringed hand encased my head to his chest, his lips kissing wherever they could reach on my face.

“I’m so sorry I hurt you JJ, I-I just didn’t want you or anyone else to get hurt because of me.” I sobbed, pulling back to look at his handsome face. 

“I’m sorry to baby, for not understanding your reasons and just blowing up like that.” he sniffed,  his hands gripping my face to kiss my cheeks before placing a tender kiss on my lips.

“I don’t want you to get hurt like that again J,” I whispered, holding his wrists.

“I don’t want to hear you talk bad about yourself anymore. I love you just the way you are...You’re perfect to me. Deal?” he smiled, kissing my nose. I giggled, throwing myself forward to kiss his lips again. 

“Deal, I love you JJ Maybank.” I said, my voice cracking.

“I love you more,” he said softly, leaning his forehead on mine.

#jj maybank x plus size reader #jj x plus size reader #plus size reader #plus size #plus size representation #plus size female #jj maybank x you #jj maybank x y/n #jj maybank x reader #jj maybank imagine #jj maybank fic #jj maybank angst #jj maybank fluff #jj maybank #jj x reader #jj x you #jj x y/n #jj fluff #jj angst #jj imagine #jj fic #jj obx #jj obx fic #jj obx imagine #jj maybank obx #obx #obx cast #obx x reader #obx angst #obx fluff

[gloomyhearts]

Always by your side || Luke Patterson

Chapter twenty-seven~ so precipitate

2020

Thick tension builds upon the group on the loft when Luke arrived back after processing what happened moments ago; the other finished up their roost; their body covered from blankets and heads resting on the pillows. Alex is in between his sister and the shaggy haired boy; her back faced the other’s; her brother wrapped an arm around her. The back of the shaggy haired boy touching Alex’s.

“Are you going to tell me what happened?” she shakes her head, and he pulls her closer, “Will, please,” he mutters, his lips brushing against her ear.

“Alex, back off!” her voice a shaking whisper and he pulls his arm back.

The blonde boy rotates and taps Luke’s back, “dude what happened?” Luke makes no move to turn around and shrugs his shoulder, “you don’t have to be rude towards me! I’m not the problem,” he humps, crossing his arms and laying on his back.

At some point in the night Alex switched his spot with Luke who was now back in back with Sabrina, so far, she hasn’t noticed. His arm slung around her abdomen, moving her gentle.

“Please. Don’t do that,” he mumbles, “I don’t wanna lose you... I can’t live without you,” he quietly cries, “I love you Brina.”

The sound of her nickname wakes her up, noticing the boy next to her and the arm around her constrained her, Sabrina's heart began to race as if she’d run a marathon, she breathed laboriously. Being overwhelmed from the heat he radiates she poofs out of his arms.

What was he thinking? Alex is such a dipshit; I’ll kill him when I’m back. Was Luke really talking about me? Well, he knows none other. But he just dreamed. It doesn’t mean anything.

Her thought was interrupted by an approaching silhouette, her eyes were in slits as she tried to recognize the frame of the person. As he steps into the light of the lantern her blood froze, “my dear,” the phrase will always give her shiver.

“Caleb... how is that...”

“No puzzling dear. I’m a powerful ghost. And I always become my will.”

“But... but why Nick?”

“Right time and place. Accidental victim, the poor boy. I’m hearing his miserable thoughts. He really likes this Julie.”

“I... I don’t know...” she stops as he decreases the gap between them, “no! no. if you take another step closer, I’ll kill you!”

“You’re not strong enough dear.”

“I wouldn’t be sure of that.”

“Then show me your powers, I’m delight to see them.”

She wasn’t sure if she had any other ability than being invisible for other ghost and if she’s honest she doesn’t want to demonstrate them in front of the evil himself.

“I knew it,” he rolls his eyes while clapping his in gloves wrapped hands.

“you know nothing. I’m capable of a lot of things your eyes are too unworthy seeing them!”

“I can give you the power you need dear.”

“I don’t need you, not today nor tomorrow!”

“You’re the mightiest ghost I’ve ever seen, besides me, indeed. Once I got the boys in my power. We’d be invincible. The band would be back at business and we’d play at the club again, come on those time were incredible!” Caleb throws his arms in the air.

“I will never let you near the boys again!”

“Okay this hurt, we’d such a good time!”

“Yeah of course, you enjoyed these, your sadistic asshole!” she hissed through gritted teeth.

“I wouldn’t call me that but yeah I did enjoy it.” He smirked at her and she felt pity for this poor boy himself.

‘I’ll save you nick’ a quick moment life twinkled in his eyes and her lips turned slightly up.

“We’ll see us, again.” She left the boy behind, cursing herself that she couldn’t help him right there, but she needed time, practice, a plan and the boys.

“We concluded you were already dead, Will.” She bows a brow at his statement.

“Yeah right ‘cause… indifferent.”

Reggie steps next to her. "Where were you?"

“I just needed to get a clear mind.”

“You look like you’ve seen a ghost, Brie.”

“I had a strange meeting with Cal... Um... Nick.”

“What?” Luke rises to his feet, “how’s that possible?”

“He was just at the beach too?”

“You met Caleb?”

“No Lexi... it was just this Nick boy.”

“Just tell us the truth!” the shaggy haired boy locked his eyes on her body, stepping closer.

“Well... maybe Caleb was there too…”

“What?” Reggie’s mouth agape.

“Caleb is in Nick, he posses him. He wants us back, battles until we’re back in his band or he’s or we’re dead.”

“And you seriously didn’t want to tell us this?!” Alex began to pace through the room.

“We just have to get stronger, debug our abilities. We can make this!” she grabs after Alex clothes to stop him, “we always make it, Lexi,” he nods to her a smile creeping on his lips.

“Okay and what specific do you mean?”

“I don’t know but I think...” her index rubs her chin, “maybe through music or Julie, we have to try.”

“Yeah... Yeah, okay.” He licks his bottom lip, “we should tell her right in the morning.”

#jatp fanfic #jatp x oc #julie and the phantoms #julie and the phantoms fanfiction #julieandthephantomsimagine #charlie gillespie fanfiction #charlie gillespie fic #jatp luke #jatpluke #luke patterson #luke patterson fanfiction #luke x oc #luke patterson x oc #julie and the fat ones #luke julie and the phantoms #jatp fic #julie and the himbos #julie and the clowns #julie and the mandem #julie and the podcasters

[porkchop-ao3]

A Thrill I’ve Never Known (Chapter 62)

Plans

Sorry for the delay but better late than never! This is a pretty long chapter so hopefully that makes up for it. Warning for use and mention of alcohol abuse. 

Tagging @emily-strange and @actuallyhansolo ❤

(All chapters tagged with #ATINK and also posted on Ao3, username PorkChop)

-

The night it all fell to shit was a weird one. It was like we were hanging in some kind of dysfunctional family limbo. Dutch left the tent where Micah was still fighting to stay alive against all the odds, and he glared at our little group of black sheep from across the camp. We'd grown in numbers, though, even if we weren't all sitting together in a posse, people were with us in spirit. Kieran and Mary-Beth had come over to see how Arthur was doing, and to make it very clear that they were firmly with us; they didn't trust Micah, never had and never would. They couldn't comprehend how Dutch was acting the way he was. 

Lenny showed his support not through words, but by silently stopping by and patting Arthur on the shoulder, nodding at him once. Karen was blind drunk but she yelled at Dutch's closed tent, chanting the words 'snake' and 'die' before Bill dragged her away and deposited her on her bed roll. In fact, Bill and Javier looked like they were the only ones who had outright sided with Dutch, and I wasn't sure if they actually believed that Arthur and the rest of us were traitors, or if they were just siding with him out of blind loyalty. Javier kept looking over at us, something like regret and confusion in his eyes but whatever he was feeling obviously wasn't strong enough to have him leave Dutch's side. Bill, though… Bill was just full of contempt and whatever he believed, it certainly wasn't any conclusion he'd drawn himself. 

Everyone else was just tiptoeing around, not seeming to firmly align themselves with anyone. These were the people who openly sympathised with Arthur and made it clear they didn't believe that any of us were the rat, but also joined Dutch at the table outside his tent where he was smoking a cigar – looking dark and pensive, miles away and stewing within a thick black cloud – to offer him similar words of comfort. The likes of Reverend Swanson, Pearson and Tilly. Even Miss Grimshaw, who seemed a little conflicted about the time she poured into nursing Micah, she didn't condemn either side. She just marched around with a perpetual sad frown, reeling at the way the family she'd tried so hard to keep moving crumbled around her. 

I felt terrible. But it could all have been avoided if Dutch hadn't been so twisted by Micah. If he'd just listened to the people that mattered the most, his 'sons'. But it seemed he'd picked his side. Though I did wonder what would happen if… or when Micah succumbed to his injury. 

"I think we should go," Arthur murmured to me quietly, as he pushed his stew around his plate. It was odd eating dinner at such a time, but there was still plenty of stew left in Pearson's pot and nobody wanted to let his hard work go to waste. Limbo. A weird feeling of normality caked in tension. Like when a marriage is breaking down but both parties are still trying to plod along, going through the motions. 

I looked up at him immediately from where I sat on the bed next to him. "Now?"

Arthur met my eyes. "Well, there's nothing left here," he said. I pondered his words. It was funny. For weeks and weeks I'd longed to hear him say that, to get a concrete agreement that we were to leave and get away together. But now that it was served to me on a platter, I felt so odd.

"You don't want to see if Micah pulls through?" I questioned. 

"I… I'm with Charles. I don't think he'll pull through," he breathed, looking back down at the plate.

"No, but," I began, not knowing where I was going. 

"You don't want to leave?" His question wasn't judgemental or annoyed. 

"Yes, I do. This just feels so surreal. So sudden. It almost feels like it'd be wrong to just pack up and leave after this has happened, like we should stay and try and sort it out somehow. Though I don't know how…"

"I know what you mean. But I'm worried about you, Micah pulled a gun on you. And I don't know what's in any of these fools' heads, there's no telling if someone's gonna try and do the same thing. And I don't know if I want to stick around and save anything that almost took you away from me, or condoned it."

I paused for a while, then finally nodded.

"Just eat up," he whispered, nodding back at me with a brooding look in his eye. "We'll start packing–"

His head jerked as something caught his eye. I followed his gaze and spotted Dutch getting up. My heart thumped painfully when for a moment I thought he was going to come over, but instead made a beeline for the horses, not looking anywhere but ahead. Without saying a word to anyone, he climbed up onto his Arabian and left. Just left. Everyone stared off in surprise, not really knowing what to say about it.

"Where's he going?" I breathed.

"I have no idea," he mused. 

"Should… should we go after him, try and talk?" I asked, meeting Arthur's eyes. He looked into mine for a while and I could see him thinking, coming to some sort of silent conclusion that made his expression sour before shaking his head sharply. 

"I don't think I wanna talk," he told me bluntly and I couldn't help but be shocked. 

"You don't even want to try? Not that I think you have an obligation to," I said softly and Arthur shrugged his shoulders with an attitude I'd never seen in him before then.

"I'm done. And I mean it. I had plenty of doubts about him before this, and now I just can't see a way of fixing things. He took Micah's word over mine. He treated you like the root cause of all our problems and he couldn't care less that Micah almost shot you," he ranted, getting progressively more pissed off. 

I looked away and thought very hard about what to say next. I was sorely tempted to say fuck it, and agree to run away with him right then and there. But I couldn't bring myself to do it. Not leaving the likes of Mary-Beth, Lenny, Abigail and Jack all here to suffer the consequences of whatever Dutch planned. Some people had made their mind up, but others… It was clear to me that they saw security in Dutch that they didn't have elsewhere. They were stuck.

"What if we ask around, and leave as a group with whoever wants to come?" I suggested. It wasn't the first time I'd said something like it, but this time felt different, like it was actually reasonable. That it actually might work. 

"And then what?" He asked me. 

"We'd take our things and go, find somewhere else to camp for a while, and then figure things out when we're not sitting in a camp full of people who might just want us dead," I said bluntly. His lips parted, his eyes bored into mine. The stare he gave was intense, and made me feel as though this was a turning point, a moment with huge gravitas and consequence. 

"I think… I think that'd be our best option," he quietly agreed. "But what will we do about money, Dutch has–" he stopped, remembering something, eyes casting across the camp, settling on the Marstons’ tent. "Hold on a second." 

Arthur got up, depositing his plate on the table by his bed before crossing over towards the tent. He called out for Abigail and John, and was ushered inside. I sat and waited, frowning to myself just slightly, pondering his sudden actions. 

Javier strolled past my eyeline, between Arthur's tent and the Marstons’. Without giving it much thought, I called to him. He paused, casting his gaze to me almost in surprise. He stood there for a few seconds, cigarette hanging from between his fingers, a dusting of ash floating down as the stub burnt away with his inaction. He looked at me expectantly, though he moved no closer. 

"Javier," I sighed sadly, shaking my head, "surely you don't trust a word Micah says. How could you? You know exactly what he's like–-"

"I don't," he told me bluntly. "I think he's full of crap," he shrugged his shoulders.

"So why are you acting like Arthur and John and the rest of us are the villains?"

"I… I don't… think that," he stammered, losing some of his conviction, speaking very hesitantly. "This situation, muñequita… this is messed up. But all I know is that you guys aren't being loyal to Dutch. And that matters to me."

"Why Dutch? Why should we be blind-loyal to Dutch when he doesn't care about us?" I frowned deeply, aggravated by his expectancy. 

"He cares. Dutch always cares."

"He's pouring all our resources into saving a man who was about to shoot me in the face. He doesn't give a rat's ass about me, or Arthur. Because if I was killed in this camp, you know it would destroy him, the guilt he would feel–" I shook my head abruptly. "Dutch has never liked me. And that's fine, I don't care, but Arthur and I– we love each other. We're in this for the long haul. But Dutch doesn't want to see Arthur happy."

"He doesn't wanna lose Arthur to you. And that's exactly what's happened; Arthur wants to leave this gang to be with you, and you think Dutch should be perfectly happy about that?"

"If he saw Arthur as a son rather than a well trained gun, an asset to his criminal gang, then yes. He should be perfectly happy about him wanting to get out of this dangerous world and settle down," I answered bluntly, shrugging my shoulders and looking at him like I couldn't for a moment understand why he didn't see it.

"Criminal gang? That's the way you see us all?" He cocked his brow, finally taking a number of steps towards me. 

"Not at the start. At the start you were all so hopeful and free. Now you're a bunch of penned in animals, lashing out and doing anything and everything to survive with no thought to anyone but yourselves. And this ain't an insult, though you'll surely take it as such. This is what Dutch's decision-making has done," I answered, keeping my eyes on his and not backing down. Javier was good. I knew he was. He was just being led into the fire by a smooth-talking egoist. 

Javier was quiet for some time, twitching a little, his jaw clenched tight. He did not want to listen. 

"Dutch saved me. He gave me hope when I had nothing, put food in my belly, shelter over my head, safety. Without him, I would not be the man I am today. I may not even be alive," he shrugged cluelessly, "and you want me to abandon him?"

"I don't want you to do anything," I sighed, finally breaking eye contact. "This is your decision to make."

"Listen, I–" he began, voice softening. "I always liked you. When Micah told us today about you and the Pinkertons, sure, I had my doubts about you. Now, I… I don't believe you're working against us. You have no motive, especially since you and Arthur…" he trailed off, sighing. 

I looked up at him again, waiting for him to make his point, though he took his time.

"But I cannot betray Dutch. I can't leave him, not now, not when he is the reason we're all still alive."

I almost told him that he was also the reason why we had to run so fast, always pushing his luck, killing Cornwall, Bronte, robbing banks in huge cities, inserting himself into a fight that wasn't ours with Eagle Flies and making things worse for them. Pissing people off left and right and acting as the ringmaster for the world's deadliest circus. 

“Where did Dutch go, anyway?” I asked, instead.

“Said he needed to clear his head. He’s really hurt, you know,” he told me and I was so close to rolling my eyes.

"He had his chance to listen to us but–” I began, then trailed off, “what's the use? I can't change your mind, Javier. I just hope things turn out right for you," I sighed. 

His lips parted, but he didn't know what to say. Eventually, he dropped his wasted cigarette and then carried on walking.

Arthur came out of the Marstons’ tent just a moment later, an edgy, agitated but somehow hopeful look about him. He came to me, immediately beginning to gather his things from around the tent, putting them away in his chest. I watched him with a confused frown, lips hanging open, about to ask him what was happening when he told me anyway. 

"We're going. Us, with those three," he told me very quietly, but in a rushed, urgent tone of voice. 

"Now?" I got up abruptly. 

"Yes. We gotta move while… while Dutch's gone. It'll be easier," he told me, "maybe some folk'll come with us. Would you do me a favour, princess?"

"Of course, anything," I blinked at him, stunned. 

"While I'm packing up, you go out there and you… you talk to anyone who's on our side, okay? You see if they want out. And you tell 'em to pack up."

"Wait, how is this gonna work?" 

"Abigail–" he began, realising he was at full volume before dialling it down, "Abigail knows where all our money is. She's got a key, she stole it while everyone was distracted, when Micah was telling his pack of lies about you. She felt like things was gonna blow up, and she was right. We got a key to all the money, every penny we been putting away for safekeeping," he rose up and closed the space between us. He cupped my face, his eyes were bright and alive, truly, for the first time I'd seen in a while. 

"So, what, are we gonna take it?" I balked in a hiss of a whisper. 

"No, not… not all of it. But we'll take our share," he told me, then pressed his lips to mine briefly, but firmly, "we deserve some of that money, it's ours. It's ours, John's, Charles'..." He trailed off, he sounded like he was trying to reassure himself more than me.

"Damn right we deserve it," I encouraged, nodding my head, "hell, I bet you put most of it in there."

"We're just gonna take enough for us, just what's fair. We ain't gonna screw the rest of 'em over. We… we…" he stammered, his eyes dropping to my mouth. I could see the light dim from his eyes and I could feel the guilt he was experiencing like it was seeping from his pores.

"Arthur, it's okay. What we're doing is okay," I whispered to him, wrapping my arms around him and hugging him tight, "Dutch ain't left us many options. It's clear his mind's made up and he don't deserve a moment more of your time. Taking a little money from the communal pot… that's the least you deserve. All them years; he's lucky this is all you're doing."

"What if he comes after us?"

"Then I'll kill the bastard myself," I said through clenched teeth. "He ain't ruining another moment. This is a good thing, baby, this is… this is the moment. The right time, what we've been waiting for."

"You're right," he breathed, turning his head towards my hair and inhaling my scent. 

"Come on. Keep packing, I'll go speak to the others," I said. 

"Abigail's gonna sneak in and get the money. She knows where it is, it's in that cave," he told me so quietly that even I struggled to hear. I pulled away from his embrace and nodded. I kissed him once more, then exited the tent. 

I scanned the whole camp, my eyes landing on Charles where he was on guard duty. It seemed so strange, again, that the menial jobs people did day to day were still being carried out. I guessed that people were just trying to cling on to normality. I sped over to him first, catching his attention when I was a few places away, he turned to look at me and grew tense at the urgency in my gait. 

"Charles," I breathed, reaching him and touching his arm, glancing around once before continuing, "Arthur and I; we're getting out of here. The Marston's too. I ain't asking you to pick a side, I will never judge you for your decision, but–"

"Of course I'll come. You needn't ask," he told me in his no nonsense tone, tilting his head up slightly in a small display of pride and loyalty. A smile broke across my face. 

"Well then," I breathed with a laugh, "I suggest you gather your things. We ain't lingering."

"Of course," he nodded.

"And will you tell Sadie? Give her the same option to get out of here? Anyone who you think might wanna come," I requested and he nodded again.

"So this is really happening? We're splitting the gang?" 

"What gang?" I grunted, turning and looking at the tattered ashes of what was left. Charles said nothing, but I knew that he saw it too. He patted my shoulder twice, and then headed off. 

Of the gang members left, there were few I wanted to ask. Some were far too loyal to Dutch; obviously the likes of Javier and Bill, others I just weren't close to. I never spoke to Strauss or Reverend Swanson; even Uncle, I didn't know any of them well enough to entertain the idea of asking. I figured Arthur would ask those sorts of people if he felt it was the right thing to do. It interested me to see that some people were already packing, though I knew they hadn't been asked yet. I assumed it was a case of fleeing the sinking ship. Pearson was one of those people, Trelawny – a man who seemed to come and go like the rain – was another. Mary-Beth was too, though she was doing it kind of slowly and subtly as if she didn't want people to notice that was what she was doing. Kieran helped her. 

I made my way over to the girls' wagon, where Karen slept, Tilly woefully held her head in her hands, and Mary-Beth quietly folded away clothes and trinkets into a case around the side.

"Ladies, may I… could I speak with you?" I asked, watching as Karen groggily lifted her head, and Tilly looked up. Mary-Beth hummed her acknowledgement but didn't stop what she was doing. 

"Arthur and I think it's best we move along, given the circumstances," I began softly, timidly. Tilly gave a humourless laugh. 

"You think?" She queried. It wasn't mean-spirited. It was just tired and sad and disappointed. She was taking it hard. 

"And we figured we'd ask folk if they wanna come too. The Marstons think it's a good idea too. I don't want this to seem like I'm asking y'all to pick a side, but I want to give you an option for if… if you don't wanna stay here no more. You ain't stuck," I continued, meeting Mary-Beth's eyes. Her lips parted and she was stunned, hesitant.

Karen grunted and slumped back down on her bedroll, ignoring the suggestion for the most part. I looked at Tilly. She stared off distantly, her mouth slightly pursed. I waited for her to say something, half expecting some anger or upset similar to that of Javier's, I thought she was just as loyal to Dutch as he was.

"I'm not going with you. But I ain't sticking around here neither," she told me, striking me full of surprise. "Things just went too far today, people pointing guns at each other, accusing everyone of everything, this ain't no place for nobody. Listen, I'm glad you have a way out of here. And I'm glad that that little boy does too," she pushed herself to her feet and pointed in the direction of the Marstons' tent. "But I… I don't think I want any part of this no more."

I nodded slowly. "I understand. Tilly, all I want is for people to do the right thing for themselves. And I want them to be safe. If you think leaving all of this behind is the right thing for you, then I'm fully behind you. You've been kind to me, just like everybody else. I appreciate the time I've known you," I told her carefully. She fidgeted a little on her feet, but nodded. 

"Thank you, I– I wish nothin' but the best for you and Arthur," she told me, then with a final nod she disappeared around the wagon. I presumed she was gathering her things. 

"I knew it," Karen slurred, her cheek pressed into the ground. "I knew she was outta here. Jus' like you, and jus' like Mary-Beth," she added. I couldn't help but frown a little, and Mary-Beth met my eyes, but Karen chuckled drunkenly. "I don't blame a single one of you. Get out before this thing kills you." 

"What'll you do, Karen?" I asked, sitting down beside her. She lifted herself up, propped up on her elbows. 

"Me? Don't worry 'bout me. I got places I can go," she told me, a dizzy smile on her face. She didn't seem to be bogged down by the gravity of the situation. The booze was to thank for that, of course. 

"Like where?"

"I don' know. Places. I'll be fine." 

"I'm worried about you," I admitted, remembering how my mother got when she drank too much. The scene before me looked too familiar for comfort.

"Y'all keep saying that. Stop it. Let me live my life," she muttered. I knew from experience there was no reasoning with a person in this state. No way to make them realise their self destruction. 

"You're welcome to come with us, Karen, if you wanna get out of here," I assured her, patting her shoulder.

"I'm with Tilly," she muttered, "this whole thing's a mess and you can run off as a group but you'll fall apart too. Ain't nothing you can do. Nothin' ever lasts," she cried out bitterly, her face screwed up in a wince that was full of anger and pain and I thought of Sean. I thought of the fact that she was clearly close to him and I thought of how things began to fall apart along with his death. I was choked up. I cleared my throat and brushed a loose ringlet from Karen's face and she peered up at me like she didn't know how to respond. 

"I'm so sorry, Karen," I whispered. 

"For what, what'chu done?" She asked. I simply shook my head. 

"I'm sorry that things have fallen apart," I added.

"Can't be helped," she sighed, reaching up and squeezing my hand. I was never particularly close to Karen, so the act warmed my heart. 

"Um, may I speak with you?" Mary-Beth squeaked like a mouse above us, gingerly edging towards me and looking at me with concerned, arched brows. 

"Of course," I nodded, then rose to my feet after giving Karen's hand a squeeze back. I followed Mary-Beth away from listening ears until she turned around and stood before me, fiddling with her fingers. 

"I'm so sorry, but I can't come with you," she blurted out, and I already began to shake my head, holding my hands out reassuringly, but she continued anyway, "you know Kieran and I? We– I promised him–"

"Mary-Beth, it's okay. I ain't asking anyone in a bid to make 'em feel like they gotta. You have your own plans. I'm glad," I smiled at her. 

"You sure? It's not that I don't trust you and Arthur and the others to keep everyone safe, it's just…" she trailed off and sighed, looking across the camp to where Kieran was. I put my hand on her shoulder.

"I know. You go and be with him. I know how you're feeling; take your chance to get away and build your life together while you still can," I told her, then opened my arms and let her decide if she wanted to hug me. She did. She closed the gap between us and squeezed me tight, rubbing my shoulders. 

I felt like I wanted to cry. Why did this feel like a goodbye? More than just a goodbye for now, but a permanent one? I swallowed back the sudden wave of emotion I felt and patted her back a couple times before we parted. She offered me a small smile and took my hands in hers. 

"I hope you build the prettiest of lives. We all deserve a little happiness, don't you think?" She told me quietly, and I nodded in agreement. 

"Yeah, I think we do," I whispered. She squeezed my hands, then headed back towards the wagon to continue her packing. 

I exhaled and turned around to look at the state the camp was left in. It was full of people packing up; a scene that wasn't by any means new or different, it'd happened time and time again already. But the fact that people were packing for themselves this time… there was no sense of community, or togetherness. It felt like an ending. A dissolving of a family that once was so strong; it was heartbreaking, but somehow inevitable. Once there was differing ideas and loyalties pulled in different directions, things would change. And they changed in the most destructive of ways; with Micah laying shivering and sweating and close to death, with Dutch running off alone and abandoning the camp for the first time ever, with the majority of people deciding that it was too late to salvage anything. Deterioration until there was nothing but a scattered collection of parts left to make the best of things. 

All because of Micah Bell.

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